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joannechocolat · 1 year

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Society of authors members - a word...

Members of the Society of Authors, we have our annual AGM on November 17th.Usually, only a hundred or so members choose to attend the AGM, but this year is going to be different. This year, we face a well-organized attempt by a relatively small group of members to take over the AGM and push through two resolutions.

The meeting is virtual, so you can attend by Zoom. You can also vote on resolutions by proxy as long as you do so before the 15th.

Before we start, this post is mine, and not an official SOA statement. But –

As members of our union, there are a number of important resolutions for you to look at during this year’s AGM, which will help shape the future of the organization. I urge you to look at them all, and especially at resolutions 6 and 7, submitted by a group headed by some prominent gender critical members.

You’ve probably noticed that this year, there has been a great deal of attention given to our little group by a (mostly hostile) media. Much of it centres on me personally, and much of what they say is typically misleading, incomplete or untrue. Most of it has been driven by social media, where for several years I have been the target of abuse and attacks by gender critical people. I believe that the two following resolutions come as a direct result of this.

Resolution 6 is an attempt to get rid of me as Chair because of my “documented behaviour and comments”, which I take to mean my statements on social media in favour of trans rights, as well as my support of the three writers of colour who received racist abuse in the wake of the Kate Clanchy affair last year.

Resolution 7 includes a demand for a commitment to free speech, which, though it may seem reasonable in principle, in this context shows a basic lack of understanding of what the SOA already does for free speech, and implies that there is bias against certain groups within the organization.

First, let’s have a look at this accusation of bias, which runs through the whole proposal. Some of the people behind these two motions have made it clear that they think that my personal opinions, as tweeted on my personal account, somehow make me unable to exercise impartiality in my capacity as SOA chair.

Okay. Let’s look at my personal opinions. I have a lot of them, and I tweet a lot. I’m a Remainer. I’m left-wing. I’m pro-choice. I wear a mask in public places. I support trans rights. I’m afraid of climate change. I hate racism in all its forms. I really like musical theatre, and (full disclosure) once unfollowed someone on Twitter for saying they hated Les Mis. But the thing I keep being accused of bias over is – you guessed it – trans rights.

If you look at the list of people proposing these motions (and if you take a glance at their Twitter profiles), you’ll find some prominent gender critical voices there. I’m not remotely surprised by this. There’s a history and a context to this attack, dating back several years. If you’d like to know more, here it is. And all this has become part of a right-wing culture wars agenda that sees me as part of “a contamination by the woke”, as this blog post (one of many) typifies.The way I see it, this targeting of the SOA is part of a wider attempt to force the organization to abandon its impartiality and to pander to the demands of the right wing, via the gender critical movement – demands that, in this case, amount to removing a democratically elected Chair, and effectively giving preferential treatment to people with gender critical beliefs.

I don’t think that having openly pro-trans beliefs is a reason to stand down as Chair. I don’t think that anyone would insist on this if I held any other belief – if I were Jewish, for instance. But having a trans son, and supporting his rights, is enough in the eyes of these people to justify this unfounded claim – a claim that either by expression my opinions, or by not supporting theirs, I have somehow “allowed” gender critical authors to be cancelled or to lose work, because of their gender critical beliefs.

This is utter nonsense. My Twitter is a personal account, like the rest of my social media. I don’t bring my clashes on Twitter into SOA meetings, or expect the SOA to defend me against criticism or abuse. Nor should anyone else: it’s not within the remit of the SOA to supervise social media, or to comment when authors disagree.What the SOA is very good at is resolving contractual complaints. But anyone needing this kind of help needs to ask the SOA for help, not complain on social media that they weren’t offered any. If my car gets a flat tyre, I don’t complain to the management of my local Toyota garage that they didn’t help me – unless I’ve actually been there first. I wouldn’t expect them to look on social media to find out if I needed repairs. Why? Because what I say on Twitter doesn’t concern my local Toyota garage. For a start, they probably don’t follow me on Twitter. And I wouldn’t expect them to intervene if someone on Twitter complained that I’d left my Toyota blocking their drive, or if someone had left a rude message on the windscreen. Because – guess what? It isn’t their job. They’re a garage, not The Batman.

So, what do I actually do at the SOA? Well, I chair the Management Committee. We deal with finances and strategy, prizes and grants. We help direct policy and, with the help of the SOA staff, determine how best to serve the members. We are not a political party, though we do lobby politicians of all parties on issues that concern our members. We do not debate “what makes a woman” because the SOA has 12,000 members, including trans people and gender critical people, and we want to serve them all. The gender critical lobby has – or so it seems to me – consistently refused to understand this. I have been asked repeatedly to debate with them on Twitter over trans rights. I have been threatened over my refusal to sign a petition that I felt legitimized JK Rowling’s comments on gender. I have received death threats and abuse. I have been told that as Chair of the SOA I must engage with this debate, and then, when I have expressed opinions, have been told by the same people that I shouldn’t have said anything. But here’s the thing. Free speech is for all, even in the case of those with whom you disagree. And a democracy treats people equally, regardless of their status. The gender critical lobby seems also not to understand this. It may have the support of some very powerful and well-connected people, but that doesn’t make their voices any more important than those of our other members. That’s why the SOA remains neutral in disagreements between individuals, whilst still supporting the free speech of everyone concerned. I’m very sure that if my opinion had swung towards the gender-critical side, no-one would be trying to claim that I was biased now. And I think that where there has been prejudice, it has been directed at me, for exercising my right to a belief that a very well-connected group of people in the media feel I simply shouldn’t hold.

Please don’t see this an an invitation to attack these people on social media. Whatever they may have said about me, whatever lies and smears they have used to make their case, I do not condone attacks or abuse in my name. If you feel there is a legitimate complaint to be made about anyone, then please do so via the SOA, according to their Dignity & Respect policy, not on Twitter. Twitter can be ugly, and things can quickly get out of hand there.

When I was elected to the Management Committee, I promised to concentrate on promoting diverse voices and ensuring that the SOA was an inclusive, fair and welcoming environment for every kind of writer. This current attack on our democracy by a vocal group of ideologues not only threatens that promise, but uses up valuable resources of time, expense and energy that would be better spent dealing with the needs of our members.

If you agree, please consider voting against Resolutions 6 and 7, either in person at the AGM, or by proxy.Here’s the link to register: If you agree, please consider voting against Resolutions 6 and 7, either in person at the AGM, or by proxy.

Here's the link to register:

See you at the AGM, where, whatever your views, I look forward to hearing you.

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andiemw · 2 years

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Life is Fleeting

Obviously. This is not a new or even profound statement. Everyone knows life is short. But what about the things IN our lives? Those are fleeting too.

Sometimes I think about how I tell my wife I love her maybe 5-10 times a day. I don’t know if that’s often or not, but the words themselves are fleeting no matter how often I say them. I truly mean it with every ounce of me, but if I’m not also doing something to make her feel that this is true, the words are just a breath swept away by a breeze. And she deserves so much more.

Anxiety is also fleeting (though in my life it comes round and round again like a boomerang I just can’t drop). It’s that feeling, like a giant hand has wrapped around my chest and is squeezing me until I’m completely crushed. But that feeling is also fleeting. I have to remind myself of this often.

Last summer I was working as a nurse in a COVID/Med Surg unit of a large hospital. I had been doing this for almost a year and when I tell you I had anxiety because of it, it’s a massive understatement. It was war. It was hell. It was all encompassing and all consuming and there was no escape. I came home and it was on the news. I went to get groceries and people were sneering at me in my scrubs or talking about how stupid it was that they had to wear masks in Walmart. And I wanted to say, come do my job for one day and you’ll shut up.

Now I have a job I love. I get to work from home sometimes. I have autonomy. I get to make my own schedule. I absolutely love teaching. My coworkers are so wonderful that I also consider them friends.

I have a beautiful home with a glorious backyard that feels like a tiny paradise.

I have the most incredible wife. She is my rock. The singular piece of my life that keeps me going no matter what. She somehow looks at me when I’m falling apart (often for no reason) and doesn’t see someone broken. She just opens her arms to me and suddenly, all is right with the world again.

It’s easy to look at all these things and say, how on earth could you still have anxiety? Your life is so good! And that’s not an untrue statement. My life IS so good. But anxiety is a strange little monster. Sometimes it pops up for no reason at all. Sometimes it’s for good reason. But there’s something in it that I don’t think I’ve fully appreciated until recently.

It makes me a freaking badass.

You know why? Because I stare it in the face and tell it NO. Because every day I try to rewire my brain to think a different way. If I don’t, I’ll “what if” myself into oblivion. But what tomorrow brings really isn’t my concern today. Today only happens once in a lifetime. This moment is one I’ll never get back. And I’m not going to spend it being afraid of something that may never happen. Why make myself experience something that might never be? Or if it is to be, I’m just causing myself to endure it twice. No. I refuse.

Bravery isn’t the lack of fear. It’s forging on in the face of fear. That’s what facing anxiety is - brave.

So if you have anxiety and it hits you for some specific reason, or for no reason at all, I’m proud of you. I’m proud of you for being here despite it. I’m proud of you for getting out of bed and saying “this won’t bring me down today”. And for living today FOR TODAY.

Don’t think about tomorrow. Don’t think about the next hour. Think about now. Breathe in. Breathe out. You’re here. The things you’ve overcome to get to this moment, you made it through all of them. And you will make it through anything else that comes your way.

Throw that giant hand of your chest.

That feeling is fleeting.

Today is beautiful.

And so are you.

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91vaults · 1 year

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It sucks getting covid but it sucks even more when you feel like you’ve done everything you possibly can and yet are taken down by the foolish actions of someone else.

I honestly thought I was going to make it through. Our current wave (where I live) is winding down, I had been wearing masks everywhere (the N95/P2 ones too) even when it got super sweaty and uncomfortable. I had gone to sweaty packed in music events and hadn’t caught anything (try wearing a mask at that and they didn’t turn the aircon on) I am quadruple vaxxed.

I had a family member come over for Christmas from interstate. They were not boosted (which at this point is essentially the same as being unvaxxed) and did not wear a mask on the plane. The second they mentioned being unwell I masked up and moves to a different bedroom/bathroom in the house. I wore a mask throughout christmas. But alas it was too little too late

It felt like we barely had much contact but somehow I still got it. I know most people would say it’s not a big deal and i’ll be fine but it’s still somewhat upsetting. It’s not just being unwell (though that sucks) it’s also not knowing how long it will take to recover, if i’ll get better or worse or (god forbid) the long term effects, if any. (not that i’m overly worried but it’s now a thing i guess) I think it’s because this was not a risk that I calculated and made a decision on myself (and maybe I’m a bit resentful cause it hit me harder than him)

I don’t want to lecture people about what they should and shouldn’t do but I feel for people who are immune compromised. Who now have to essentially play russian roulette every time they leave the house because other people don’t care. It takes zero effort to wear a mask or keep up with vaccinations. We’re all operating under the assumption that catching covid is a trivial matter and I don’t really get it.

It’s made me feel like eveything I did was for nothing and that I may as well not bother. I got it. I’m not the main character in the plague movie, i’m just a nameless casualty. But I know that’s untrue. Reducing the number of times I got infected was still important and will be going forward. I just feel like I was so close to making it out. And i hated it every time someone said “we’ll we’re all gonna catch it” I thought i could prove them wrong 😞.

#covid #covid vaccine #covid booster #covidー19 #covid isn't over #covid 19 #fuck covid #coronavirus #thoughts

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aphrostarot · 3 years

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The Hermit Pick a Pile

What needs to be illuminated in your life right now, what mask do you wear in public, who are you truly, and how can you embrace who you truly are?

Please remember that this is a general reading and some things may not apply to you. Don't force it to fit. I offer paid readings on my page if you would like a personal reading. Prices are listed there. Please message me or email me if you are interested!

Pile One (Rose Quartz):

What needs to be illuminated in your life right now?

Knight of Wands:

I think you aren't aware of how fast your life is moving right now. You recently experienced a change in your life that has caused everything in your life to accelerate rapidly. I think that thing was a choice you made. You may have hesitated when it came to making that decision, but now that you have, your life is moving quite quickly.

What mask do you present to others?

Six of Swords:

Out in public, you would much rather have others see you as someone who uses their brain instead of their heart. You think that if you were to show emotions to others then that would give them the ammo they need to damage you. You are a great problem solver, and you want everyone around you to come to you for answers to their problems, not for emotional support.

I am getting strong Virgo energy here.

The Alien:

You like to be mysterious and not fully understood. You want people around you to not know the real you. Your curiosity leads you to become involved in other people's affairs, wanting to solve their problems but never showing who you truly are in the process. You don't let people get too close to you, just close enough for them to be satisfied.

Who are you when you’re alone?

King of Cups:

When you are free from the judgment of others, you are an extremely sensitive person. You have a very kind, loving, and generous nature. You have a pure heart and pure intentions. It's quite different from what you show in public, which is interesting.

The Gamine:

You are quite unconventional. Many times you reject what society wants from you, choosing instead to follow your own path. Your style is quite bohemian and independent. You have a whimsical way about you that draws people in and makes you extremely charming.

What is your potential if you could embrace your true self?

The Star:

A choice you made may have emptied you of hope in life, preventing you from seeing how fast your life is moving towards your goals, as well as who you are. As soon as you begin to embrace who you truly are, you will begin to find hope in your life again. Soon you will embrace your more optimistic side.

Pile Two (Amazonite):

What needs to be illuminated in your life right now?

Queen of Cups:

Currently, you may feel that there are people in your life who do not have your best interests at heart. You believe they won't be loyal to you and will take advantage of you in the long run. Your guides are telling you that this is untrue by bringing this card out. You are incorrect in your suspicions of this person. You can count on this person to be loyal to you and to look out for your interests.

What mask do you present to others?

Seven of Pentacles:

When you are out in public, you come across as a very hard worker. Due to your strong work ethic, you want people to think that you are driven towards success. You are also a very patient person, constantly planting seeds that will flourish in the future.

The Witch:

The Witch strives to educate herself constantly in order to further her success. It is her goal to manifest her dreams and be the strongest person she can be. In public, surrounded by the judgments of others, you present yourself in this manner.

Who are you when you’re alone?

Page of Wands:

Whenever you are alone and free from the judgments of others, you are a free thinker and a thrill seeker. You are always looking for new adventures, especially in exotic locations. You have a very youthful spirit and are very cheerful.

The Career Girl:

Career Girls are driven to succeed and are always striving to climb the career ladder. They are very independent and are willing to preserve towards their desired outcome no matter what. According to your guides, this is who you are when you are alone, and it's very similar to who you are in public.

What is your potential if you could embrace your true self?

Two of Wands:

Once you embrace your true self and start to show your true self to the public, you'll be able to see that this person who you are suspicious of is actually loyal to you. With this person, you will be able to work better together and create a better partnership.

Six of Wands:

Once you do this, you will also have more success in your life. All your endeavors will be rewarded with victories. At this point, all you have to do is accept who you are and start expressing yourself publicly.

Pile Three (Amethyst):

What needs to be illuminated in your life right now?

The Moon:

Having this card come out is a bit redundant but it is your guides saying that there clearly is something in your life that you are not viewing correctly. You are thinking one thing when in fact it is actually a completely different thing.

Four of Pentacles:

Currently, you may feel very possessive over certain things in your life. Perhaps you believe that something terrible is going to happen that will cause it to leave your life. It might also be that you feel others are not worthy of experiencing what you have, which makes you unwilling to share. Regardless of your reasoning, your guides are telling you that these views are incorrect.

What mask do you present to others?

The Fool:

Publicly, you appear to be a very youthful free spirit. You wear the mask of someone who rushes into every situation that life throws your way, never too worried about what the future holds, living in the moment.

Queen of Pentacles:

In addition, you present yourself as a loving, sensual individual. With a heart full of love for nature and animals. You have a very kind heart and love to share with the people around you. You strive to make sure everyone feels comfortable around you, so you do everything in your power to make sure everyone is taken care of.

The Spinster:

You present yourself as someone who is highly independent, preferring to be alone. Some may think you are lonely that way, but you aren't. You enjoy being alone and spending time with your animals and plants.

Who are you when you’re alone?

Knight of Wands:

Your charisma and confidence are enhanced when you're free from the judgment of others. You never back down from a challenge and aren’t afraid to take action. When you are alone, you still exude that Fool's energy, but you are more mature.

The Alien:

You like to be mysterious and not fully understood which is why you rarely show your true self around other people. You want people around you to not know the real you. Your curiosity leads you to become involved in other people's affairs, wanting to solve their problems but never showing who you truly are in the process. You don't let people get too close to you, just close enough for them to be satisfied.

What is your potential if you could embrace your true self?

Three of Wands:

Your guides are saying that once you fully embrace your true self and start to show others who you truly are, you will work much better in groups. With time, you will surround yourself with many people who love and support you for who you are. As a result, you will no longer feel possessive over the things in your life. The closer you become to others, the more generous you will become.

Pile Four (Fuchsite):

What needs to be illuminated in your life right now?

Ace of Pentacles:

You may be unaware of new opportunities entering your life that will be bringing you more wealth and abundance. Or, you may be unaware of the effects that these new opportunities have on your life.

Six of Pentacles:

If you happen to be unaware of the effects that these new opportunities are having on your life, it seems that with this care you are becoming more of a generous person. If you are already aware of your generosity, then you may not realize that it is actually hindering your life right now. You may be giving more than you're receiving.

What mask do you present to others?

Knight of Wands:

When you are in public, you come across as someone who is very charming and confident. Because you don't want others to see the true you, you act as if you are extremely confident. When you are around people, you tend to take on whatever is thrown at you since you don't want them to think you are anything less than capable.

Four of Wands:

You are the party planner, the person who is always in close contact and brings people together. When around others, you tend to be pretty cheerful, even if it's an act. You are known as the friend who is always up for a good time and is always happy, which can sometimes be a burden, especially when you don't feel like entertaining.

The Dancer:

You have a lot of energy when you are surrounded by others and you are willing to freely express yourself. Also, you are always eager to understand and connect with everyone around you.

Who are you when you’re alone?

Six of Wands:

You seem to genuinely show your true self when you are around others. The only problem I am getting is that you tend to overdo the cheerful nature of yourself. You do not want people to think that you are anything less than happy. When you are alone though, you let that facade drop. You are more willing to express your darker side. You, however, are still a very confident person when you are alone. You love being in the spotlight and are a great leader.

The Earth Mother:

You have a strong connection to the earth and this side of you shows when you are alone. You may love gardening, or just being in nature. You have a very sensitive nature which only shows when you are alone or with people with whom you are comfortable.

I am getting very strong fire and earth energy here. You may have Aries, Leo, Sagittarius, Taurus, Capricorn, or Virgo somewhere in your chart.

What is your potential if you could embrace your true self?

King of Pentacles:

When you begin to embrace your truest self, and it seems that you are not far from doing this, you will begin to embrace the King's energy. While you will still be very generous, you will be more aware of how generous you are. Also, you will have more abundance and wealth than you do now, which will enable you to fully embrace your leadership qualities.

Though tips are not required, they are very much appreciated. Thank you!

Venmo: @ aphrostarot

Paypal: paypal/aphrostarot

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phykios · 3 years

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this one is dedicated to mi amor mari @perseannabeth, who is a beautiful bird and a wonderful friend and i am v v vvvvv grateful to have crossed the airwaves with her :”)

Today Was A Fairytale [read on ao3] T, modern royalty, fun at disneyland!

She stares at him.

He stares back. “What?”

“Really?”

“What?”

“You really think this is going to be enough?” Annabeth points at her head, the blue Yankees cap squishing her curls.

“Of course! It’s the Clark Kent effect.” As if to underline his point, Percy slips on his fake hipster glasses, except that stupid grin of his is too bright not to draw attention.

“That’s not a real thing.”

“Sure it is. Studies show that glasses are actually good enough to alter your appearance if someone doesn’t know you well.”

“Then why didn’t you bring a pair of glasses for me?”

“Because your hair is definitely the prettiest thing about you,” he says, automatically tugging an unruly curl which peeks out from under the brim, a gesture so practiced she almost doesn’t register it--until he blinks, dropping his hand, blushing lightly. “I mean--the most noticeable thing. You know. A hat should be fine.”

He looks away. Heat rises to her face, too. Because it’s so hot out, obviously.

“Anyway,” he mumbles, “um. No--no one’s going to give you a second look if your hair is hidden.”

Chewing her lip, Annabeth can’t help but worry. Percy’s face is extremely well-known, possibly more than hers, and they’ve both spent the better part of three weeks with their faces plastered all over the media on their diplomatic trip. This is probably a really, really bad idea. Then, a thought occurs to her. “How about,” she says, perking up, “you give me your glasses, and I’ll give you mine.” From her backpack, she fishes out a pair of sunglasses, big and nondescript. He’ll practically be wearing a superhero mask with these.

Percy smiles again, and Annabeth thinks she might fly. “Perfect.”

Which is how Her Royal Highness Anna Elisabeth Ingrid Irene of Sweden and His Serene Highness Perseus Alexandros Ioannis of Thera play hooky from their day of boring meetings, insufferable dignitaries, and stuffy security guards, to go see the eighth wonder of the world: Disneyland Resort in California.

And how Annabeth eats her words as they make it past the security gate unchecked. “Eh?” He beams, nudging her with his elbow. “Eh?”

Rolling her eyes, she shoves him back. “Shut up.”

***

[description: a tiktok video which depicts a line at Disneyland. the op, a black girl with braids, covers her mouth and looking into the camera, turning the camera to focus on the two people behind her. one is a tall boy with black hair and sunglasses, and the other is a blonde girl with a yankees hat and glasses. both are white. video text reads: “p sure the people behind me are prince percy and princess annabeth??? um?????”. background audio is a dubstep remix of the fight theme from undertale. end ID]

***

Maybe it’s a little weird, on account of her being actual royalty and all, but Annabeth has always been interested in princesses, both as a matter of historical record (history is awesome) and in the general sense. Like millions of other people, she, too, was raised on Disney movies and tales of princesses and true love, and she was just as captivated as the rest of them. She and Percy used to watch the Disney catalogue whenever their families held state visits for each other, staying up into the small hours of the morning, sharing some popcorn and singing along.

Luckily for Annabeth, her favorite princess is holding a meet and greet at the Royal Hall.

“Excuse me,” Percy says, approaching Princess Ariel. Well, her cast member, anyway. “Could I get a photo for my friend?”

“Of course!” she trills, her blue eyes sparkling. “It would be my pleasure.” Holding her hand out, perfectly poised and graceful in a way that would impress even Annabeth’s stodgy etiquette instructor, she smiles, warm and welcoming, pivoting to bring Annabeth in for one of those weird, semi-awkward half-hugs. “What’s your name?”

“Anna,” says Annabeth. Hey, it’s not untrue. She’s a little leery of using any of her names, but Anna is common enough. Annabeth? Not so much. Even with her glasses and hat disguise, a little paranoia is justified, she thinks.

“It’s so wonderful to meet you, Anna,” she says, cheerful, with all the grace and charm of someone who doesn’t spend hours saying the same thing over and over again to excitable, temperamental children. What a trooper, she thinks.

“Don’t you recognize a fellow princess when you see one, your highness?” Percy says, grinning that stupid, smarmy grin of his.

Annabeth glares. Oh, he thinks he’s so damn clever.

“Oh, of course,” says Ariel, smoothly. “How could I have thought otherwise? Your highness.” And she curtsies to Annabeth, a short dip, her hand placed delicately against her chest. “Perhaps I can introduce you to my friend Anna, princess of Arendelle?”

Still smirking, Percy takes some more pictures, trapping Annabeth into smiling for the camera. She can’t be glaring daggers in her pictures, nor can there be video evidence of her kicking him--no matter how much she wants to.

And she definitely doesn’t miss the way Ariel not-so-subtly checks Percy out, eyeing him up and down.

“You fucking asshole,” she hisses as they leave the photo area, swatting him lightly, and he giggles.

“Sorry, sorry, I couldn’t resist.”

“Ugh, I hate you so much.”

It’s hard to stay mad at him, though she definitely tries as they enter back out into the park proper, giving him just the barest hint of a cold shoulder.

“Aw, come on,” Percy says. “I was just teasing.”

“You shouldn’t go around tempting fate like that,” Annabeth says. “Do you want to cause another international incident?”

Percy winces, no doubt remembering the Gateway Arch incident of 2008.

“If someone recognizes us, we don’t have Zoe or any of her team to protect us,” Annabeth goes on. “Not that I think anyone here would try to hurt us, but…” But it’s a little nerve-wracking, being on her own like this. She hasn’t been alone like this for a really long time.

Wincing, Percy rubs the back of his head. “I guess I forgot you’re a little higher profile than me. Sorry.”

She doesn’t like to think about it, but it’s true. Percy, by his nature as the younger son of a largely defunct royal house, doesn’t have quite the same number of… issues… that someone like Annabeth might have.

Deflating, she uncrosses her arms. “It’s okay.”

“I should have asked you first.”

“It’s really okay,” she says. “No harm no foul.”

“Do you want to get out of here?” he asks, entirely serious. “I can call someone up.”

She knows just how long they’ve planned this, how many favors he’s called in and policies he’s sidestepped. Backing out now would just be a waste of a day. She shakes her head. “It’s fine,” she says. “I’m just… feeling a little exposed, I guess. But, I don’t want to ruin all our plans. Let’s keep going.” She grabs his hand, squeezing a little.

“...Okay,” Percy says. “But say the word, and we’ll call it a day. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Good.” Like he doesn’t have any other expression today, he smiles at her again.

It hits her, suddenly. He’s so much taller than she remembers. Once upon a time she used to be taller than him; now, he’s basically a whole head above her.

It’s annoying. But also… not.

Spying something over her shoulder, his eyes light up, and he practically gasps. “Cinderella!” he points with his free hand, like a five-year old. “Come on!” And he takes off to one of the park corners, dragging Annabeth along with him.

He has to wait in line behind a pair of twin girls, six or seven years old by the looks of it, in identical Cinderella dresses for a photo, bouncing up and down on the balls of his feet, and when it’s finally his turn, he nearly trips over himself to go up and ask for a photo.

Cinderella agrees, and now Annabeth is relegated to the job of cameraperson. Percy slides in next to the princess, his hand on her waist, but, ever the respectful gentleman, loosely held, so the cast member can slide out of his grasp without any difficulty at all.

Taking a few shots, it does look kind of strange to have Cinderella’s beautiful, shining face, and Percy’s enormous sunglasses blocking his. “Take off your glasses?” she says, lowering her phone for a second.

Dutifully, Percy slips them off, smiling again for the camera.

Cinderella’s smile doesn’t falter, a credit to her professionalism, but Annabeth can see her eyes widen, just a touch.

Annabeth snaps off a few more photos, “Got ‘em!” and Percy once again gushes over the princess, thanking her for her time. Grabbing Annabeth’s hand again, he practically skips off, leading them in the direction of a nearby candy shop.

***

me: IM SHAKING GUESS WHO I JUST TOOK A PICTURE WITH????

sis: prince percy?

me: HOW TF DID YOU KNOW

sis: its on twitter already

***

They’re walking along, Annabeth slurping up a Dole whip, when she suddenly stops in her tracks, outside of one of the many, many gift shops. “Wait up a second.”

“Hm?” Percy says, around the giant lollipop in his mouth.

“I want to get some Mickey ears.”

Very quickly they get lost in the sea of Disney merchandise, walking the labyrinth of Star Wars and Marvel and Pixar goods. There’s a surprising amount of black for the so-called happiest place on Earth, but things do brighten up when Annabeth finally turns a corner and finds the enormous selection of Mickey ears. It’s a wash of sparkles, flowers, bows, and occasionally characters, for children and adults alike. Annabeth eyes a pair designed like Baby Yoda, eyes wide and ears adorably huge, before she fingers a pair of white Mickey ears that have a bridal veil attached to them, contemplating its counterpart, the black ears for the groom, each ear emblazoned with a sparkling silver “Happily Ever After.”

She looks around. Where did Percy wander off to, anyway?

Well, wherever he is, hopefully he hasn’t gotten mobbed by a horde of excitable fangirls. Given that she can’t hear any screaming--well, any unusual, non-Disneyland-relevant screaming--that’s probably a good sign.

Running her fingers over the ear selections, she finally picks out a pair of silver sequined earrings with a shiny gold bow, a tiny, rhinestone Cinderella’s castle placed delicately in the middle.

Yeah. This one.

Percy finds her as she is paying for her ears, a pair of his own already on his head, red balloons inside of plastic circles. The sunglasses, she notes with a tinge of nervousness, are tucked in his shirt, and not on his face, protecting his identity. “Oh, check mine out--they light up!” he says, giddy, pressing the button on the side, not that she can tell in the brightly lit shop.

“That’s not why I was looking.”

Walking out of the store, ears firmly in her possession, she looks around again. Percy’s face is out there for the world to see, and no one is giving them a hard time.

And her hat is really sweaty.

Ah, fuck it.

She removes the Yankees cap, shaking out her sweaty curls, sliding the ears on in its place.

And the glasses, for good measure.

“Cinderella?” Percy asks.

“I thought you’d approve.”

Outside the shop, next to a corn dog cart, Percy pulls her aside, out of the way of a whole classroom’s worth of children, holding up a plastic plag. “So, confession.”

“Percy…” He didn’t. “We said no gifts!” They had agreed to it that morning!

“Well, see,” he says, fumbling around in the bag, pulling out a black t-shirt. “I saw this, and I thought--I thought you might like it.”

He unfolds it, and Annabeth frowns at the shirt design.

It’s… a drawing of a man in a purple mask against a solid black background, glaring at the viewer. Circling him, in distressed, white-grey military font, are the words “BARON ZEMO,” and the logo for the show he must star in, Marvel’s The Falcon and the Winter Soldier. She doesn’t really watch superhero shows, though, and she’s pretty sure Percy doesn’t, either. Maybe he’s started this one and he really likes it? “Thanks,” she says, confusion coloring her voice despite her best efforts.

But he doesn’t look too disappointed. “I was looking through their pride merch, and they didn’t have any stuff with the ace flag, which totally sucks, but then I thought that maybe you might like something a little more subtle? So, yeah.” He shakes it. “Ace pride!”

Oh. Oh, this boy.

She remembers, so vividly, visiting his father’s summer home on Kalymnos, a few years ago, the summer she turned nineteen, waking up to a banging in the kitchen, noisy pots and pans making a real racket. Granted, it had been one in the afternoon, and Annabeth probably should have been awake sooner, but she had stumbled out of the guest room into the kitchen, rubbing sleep out of her eyes, to the sight of Percy wrestling with the standmixer, making bright, neon purple frosting. The night before, sometime around three or four AM, that weird, liminal hour where the shadow of night just starts to recede, the sky a sweet, soft, dusky blue, she had come out as demisexual to her best friend, saying the words aloud for the first time ever. Loopy from lack of sleep, the moment had passed without much fanfare.

But Percy, dark-circled and still yawning, had woken up early to make her a chocolate cake. By the time she had woken up, he had baked the cake, chilled it, and made two out of the three frosting colors, a beautiful, moist, dark chocolate cake which ended up being frosted with a marbled mix of purple, black, and white, all folding into each other into a kind of colorless, grey sugar.

Here, now, in Disneyland, she throws herself at him, wrapping his arms around his neck. His arms automatically come up to circle her, hugging her tight.

She had been worried it had been some kind of defense mechanism. A young girl with an alarmingly high profile, Annabeth had been the subject of intense scrutiny with regards to any romantic entanglements, with critics, tabloid reporters, and fans alike attempting to invent gossip-worthy relationships with every boy she ever talked to--most usually Percy. They did grow up in the public eye together, attending all kinds of events and functions together over the last fifteen or so years. And they did tweet at each other. Like, a lot. They even had their own portmanteau hashtag. But no relationship ever materialized.

She thought maybe she was just being stubborn, unwilling to play the media game. But it hadn’t been stubbornness. It wasn’t about shyness or inexperience. It was real, and it was her.

And Percy hadn’t even blinked.

“I love it,” she murmurs. “Thank you.”

“Of course,” he says, swaying her from side to side, just a little. “It was my pleasure.”

***

What’s happening: #percabeth (Entertainment • trending)

@kndrck__ STREAM CHROMATICA: um @TheraUS @SwedenRoyals i think i found your sick royals? #percabeth #disneyland

@wasabiviking: omg werent they supposed to be at some hospital opening today #percabeth

@ChampionSno brando he/him: LMAOOO NOT #PERCABETH PLAYING HOOKY LIKE IT’S ROMAN HOLIDAY

***

“Holy shit,” Percy moans, his mouth full of food. “Oh my God. Dear God in Heaven.”

Annabeth kicks his ankle under the table. “Don’t be rude.”

He swallows, eyes fluttering. “Oh my God, Annabeth. Holy shit. This is the best damn sandwich I’ve ever had in my entire life.”

“A monte cristo?”

“A deep-fried monte cristo! In sweet batter!” Taking another bite, he moans again, just this side of indecent. “Oh my God I love Americans. They are absolute culinary geniuses.”

“Better than Bistrot Chez Rémy?” They had both been to Disneyland Paris, separately, sadly, and Percy had recommended the restaurant to her with great enthusiasm for her upcoming trip. As usual, he was spot on with his food recs.

He nods, eyes closed in rapture. “By a mile.”

“You’ll have to learn to make your own when we get back home, then.”

He jolts, straightening up, cheeks full of food. Roughly, he swallows. “You’re right! I need to take notes.” And he takes out his phone, hurriedly typing down whatever scent and flavor notes he must be able to discern. “This is definitely challah…”

Plucking another piece of chicken with her fork out of her jambalaya, Annabeth lets her attention wander a little, content to watch the passengers on the Pirates of the Caribbean ride as they float on beside them, down in the artificially constructed bayou river.

Truth be told, she’s kind of tired. They’ve been walking around all day, and even with the brief reprieve of rides, her shoes really aren’t the kind that deal well with huge amounts of walking. She can already tell that she’s going to crash, and crash hard, whenever they get back to their hotel. You know, if their security detail doesn’t eviscerate them first.

When Percy had first presented his idea to her, she had agreed without hesitation. They had had a long, dense schedule of public appearances planned for their excursions to the states, and the days had begun to seriously wear them out. Together, they had worked out the kinks, coming up with contingencies, negotiating things to do, all over Discord so no one else would get wind of what they were doing. Prior to this trip, she hadn’t seen him in… probably almost a year. She knows his father had been keeping him close to home for whatever reason, and Annabeth had had a handful of official functions to deal with. Their paths just never managed to cross, up until now.

She hadn’t realized how much she had missed him.

It’s lonely, growing up in the public eye. It’s cliche, but it’s true. And while Annabeth is afforded a metric ton of various intersecting privileges, she thinks she’d probably give it up in a heartbeat. It kind of sucks being a living, breathing tourist attraction.

Growing up, she had her cousin Magnus, and a handful of other assorted children to play with, but she would never say that she had a best friend, or even a good friend, until she’d met Percy. Her mother and his father, famous for their mutual dislike, had put aside their differences to host some kind of charitable dinner for the disgustingly wealthy, and had trotted out their respective children in all their finery. Annabeth, being all of twelve years old, hadn’t really grasped the gravity of the event, and had gotten into an itty bitty little food fight with the then-unknown Prince Perseus, the result of an extramarital affair whom his father had so graciously decided to acknowledge and adopt.

After that night, they became fast friends, and she decided that, if she ever left the royal life, she’d make sure to take Percy with her. He’s one of the few things that makes her life bearable.

She thinks about it, sometimes. Renouncing her title. It wouldn’t exactly be hard. There was Magnus, just in line behind her. And it’s not like her family held any executive power anyway. They’re just fancy, historically interesting celebrities.

Would Percy give up his, she wonders?

“Hey.”

“Hm?”

He looks at her oddly over their dessert, two vanilla-bourbon creme brulees. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” she says. “Just tired. Long day.”

“You want to call it a night?”

She frowns. “What’s left?”

“Well, we did Space Mountain, Rise of the Resistance, Haunted Mansion, Pirates of the Caribbean, a few others,” he counts off his fingers, “saw the princesses, got Mickey ears, ate at Blue Bayou… I guess all that’s left is walking around the pier, if you want.”

“Sounds like you two had a full day.”

As one, they almost leap out of their seats, Annabeth choking on her spit. “Jesus, Zoe,” Percy pants, his hand over his chest. “You nearly gave me a heart attack.”

“Oh?” says Zoe Nightshade, the head of their security detail, who had just apparently materialized out of thin air. “Funny. I could say the same about you, sir.”

Coughing, Annabeth eventually manages to get her air back. “Hey, Zoe,” she wheezes. “How was your day?”

“Eventful. Let me tell you about it in the car.”

Annabeth glances at Percy, who’s looking a little bit like a deer in headlights. Honestly, she’s surprised they even made it this far without one of their own tracking them down. Still, it looks like their game is up.

...Or is it?

Out of the corner of her eye, she sees a large tour group, approaching on the horizon.

“Sure,” Annabeth says, getting up. Luckily, they’ve already paid, so they can just head out; they don’t need to wait for another big group of people to cross their paths. “Will you let us go to the bathroom, first?”

Zoe squints. She’s always been able to see through Annabeth’s bullshit. But Annabeth has her best, Percy-patented baby seal eyes on, perfectly innocent. Surely, Zoe wouldn’t deny them a physical need such as relieving themselves?

After a moment, she nods. “Make it quick, if you please.”

“Of course,” Annabeth says, looking over at Percy, hoping he gets the message. He stands up, slow and stiff, eyes darting between the two of them. “We’ll be right back.”

They wander through tables and chairs towards the bathroom, her eyes always on the tour group as it just starts to pass by. Reaching out, Annabeth grabs Percy’s hand, and with a turn that would make her track coach proud, sprints out of the restaurant, using the throng of people as cover.

She thinks she hears Zoe yelling behind them, but maybe it’s just her own laughter. “Come on!” she shrieks, breathless, as Percy’s long legs keep pace with her. “To California Adventure!”

***

darthbingus said: the monarchy are fucking parasites but percabeth is pretty cute i guess :/

ladyofsandwiches reblogged and said: it’s obviously a publicity thing lmao, also prince Percy is gay???

eowynning reblogged and said: he’s dating rachel dare, right? he can’t be gay

ladyofsandwiches reblogged and said: That was a publicity thing too obvs, and Annabeth hasn’t ever been linked to a guy. The king of thera is hardline greek orthodox, there’s no way he’d let his son come out publicly. They’re both gay and pretending to date because homophobia

lardoftheprks reblogged and said: people can be bi and ace and pan and all sorts of things you know

batgirlcock reblogged and said: can you animals leave them alone fr

***

Zoe only spots them after the ferris wheel starts moving. Sprinting over to them, they’re still a full forty feet off the ground by the time she reaches the operator. “Sorry!” she yells down to her, hands cupping her mouth. “We’ll be down in ten minutes!”

“Ananbeth!” he chokes, giggles still escaping him.

“What?” she laughs.

“We’re in enough trouble as it is!”

“Exactly,” she says, settling back on the ride. “You’ll probably be grounded for life.”

“Me?” he squawks, playfully offended. “What about you?”

She scoffs. “Please. I’ll just pin it all on you.”

Leaning back, he pouts, arms crossed. “Wow. I plan this amazing day, violate a few embassorial rules, and probably put both of our countries on a massive red alert, and this is the thanks I get?”

“I helped plan it, too.” But he does have a point. “Thank you,” she says. “I had a lot of fun today.”

He turns his head to her, a grin stretching across his face. “Me too.”

His voice is so soft, so fond. They share a look, a moment, no words between them, only the silence of a true, deep companionship. They don’t need to say anything else, because they already know what the other would say.

As one, they break away, looking back out into the California evening.

They don’t talk much as the ferris wheel climbs higher and higher. Honestly, Annabeth is kind of impressed with how well he’s handling himself--she knows heights are a bit of a weakness of his. He grabs the edges of their gondola every once in a while as it drops a few feet, knuckles white and face a little green, but he manages to keep his dinner down, even as the ferris wheel grinds to a halt, Percy and Annabeth at the top of the world. The swing back and forth a little, hot faces against the cool evening breeze.

And they stay there.

And stay there.

And… stay there.

Annabeth checks her watch. How long have they been up here?

Percy taps his feet, a little too frantic just to be ADHD.

Finally, there’s a burst of noise from below them, garbled and static. “Uh, yes, excuse me--” the voice says, amplified through a megaphone. “Yeah, um, it appears we are having some… uh, technical difficulties with the Pixar Pal-A-Round. Please remain calm, as we have our best technicians on it, and we are working on evacuating the ride in a calm and efficient manner.” Then the voice cuts out.

Annabeth glances towards Percy. He has his hands in his lap, fists clenching and unclenching, over and over again. “Uh… you okay?”

“Hm? Oh, sure,” Percy says, “just fine. Peachy keen.” He squeezes his eyes shut, slowly blowing out his breath through his mouth.

“Hey.” She reaches over, and takes one of his hands in hers, lacing their fingers together. After a long day of holding hands, somehow it still manages to surprise her, how well they fit together, how her skin tingles as she rubs her thumb against his finger. “It’s gonna be fine. We’re gonna be just fine. They’re going to get us off this ride, and then we’ll fly home and be grounded for life.”

“I thought,” he wheezes, “you’d blame it all on me?”

“As if you could come up with a plan as genius as hiding from our guard in It's A Small World.”

He nods, shakily. “Right. All you. Definitely not my idea. Everyone knows I’d have looped back to Pirates of the Caribbean.”

“Definitely.” She squeezes his hand, scooting a little closer. “Just breathe with me a little, okay?”

They breathe together, slowly and evenly. At some point, Percy takes her hand in both of his, running his thumbs over her palm, tracing her lifelines like a map. His hands are big, and warm, and it seems to calm him down a little, so she doesn’t mind all that much.

Twilight darkens, stars twinkling against the grey, dusky sky, and still they are holding hands. Eventually, Percy relaxes, slumping against his seat.

“You good?”

He nods. He still doesn’t let go. “Yeah. Just…” he sighs, stretching his arms up, taking Annabeth’s hand with him. “Not super looking forward to the dressing down I’m going to get.”

She winces. Annabeth’s dad is a little more flexible than Percy’s when it comes to breaches of protocol. The king of Thera is somewhat famous for his paranoia. “I hope it was worth it.”

He whips his head to her, eyes wide. “Of course it was worth it!” he says, as though the opposite were even fathomable. “You kidding? This was the best day of my life.”

“Better than your sixteenth?” His father had officially acknowledged him that day. Annabeth had spotted him in a deserted hallway with his mother, the two of them fighting off a few happy tears. She knows just how special that day was for him.

“Not even close.” Squeezing her hand, he smiles again, that smile she knows almost better than her own by now. That smile she grew up with, a quiet oasis in a whirlwind of ancient tradition and modern media coverage. That smile is safety, familiarity. That smile was there to greet her when her mother chose to leave her family, when her uncle died without heirs, thrusting the position of heiress on her, whenever she had a rotten day or a bad grade or a lonely night, just on the other end of a phone, or down the hall, or in the kitchen.

Whatever happens, she knows, Percy will be her best friend. Her anchor.

Her…

She swallows. “Thank you,” she says again. “I needed this.” A day without an agenda. A day just for them.

His eyes are dark, and soft, like the water beneath them. One hundred and fifty feet in the air in a broken ferris wheel, there’s nowhere safer she can be. “Me too.”

So she’s not really surprised at herself when she says, “I’d really like to kiss you now.”

Eyes widening, just a hair, he opens his mouth, momentarily speechless. “You--are you sure?”

She nods, maybe a little too enthusiastically.

“Cool. Uh, me too.”

“Cool.”

Neither of them move.

“So, do--do you want to--”

Annabeth leans in, her other hand cupping his cheek, and kisses him.

His lips are soft. His mouth tastes like vanilla and bourbon. They are trapped in a metal box, one hundred and fifty feet off the ground, about to get the punishment of their lives when they get down, and it is absolutely, utterly perfect.

And when Annabeth pulls back, there are fireworks.

Quite literally.

Percy’s face glows with pink and green and purple, and a little fire in his eyes that’s all him. The pops of the fireworks, loud and brassy, and muted, completely overshadowed by the pounding of her heart in her chest.

They rest their heads against each other, breathing each other’s air, quiet and intimate, the calm before the storm that is surely coming. But that’s fine. Let it come, she thinks. She’ll be safe with Percy.

When the park technicians eventually get the ferris wheel moving again, Percy and Annabeth disembark from the gondola like nothing’s even gone wrong, waving to the crowd of people, fans, and reporters alike, who have swarmed the pier, phones and cameras held aloft in a constellation of light, before being quickly hurried away by Zoe and her crew, ushered to the end of the pier where Annabeth’s embassy’s car is waiting.

Percy doesn’t let go of her hand once.

***

KALYMNOS, GREECE--Prince Percy has arrived on the island for his family’s annual summer retreat, bringing his girlfriend, Princess Annabeth of Sweden, with him for the fifth year in a row, and the third as his official partner. Lifelong friends, the couple were most recently seen at Disneyland Tokyo, continuing something of a tradition for the two royals where they visit Disneyland parks across the globe. Our sources inside the castle are hinting that the family is planning something big this year. Could we see a proposal by the end of summer? Be sure to subscribe for more updates!

#pjo fic #percabeth #percabeth fic #my fic #au #perseannabeth #the rivalry ends here #will i ever stop writing modern royalty aus? no 💖#also look mari i even used a taylor swift song

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jayeray-hq · 3 years

Text

Sakusa : You Know We’re Meant to Be

JayeRay’s fluff prompts

Post Time Skip/Manga Spoilers!

Warnings: A little but of Hurt/Comfort and bullying but lots of Fluff after

If you like this, please check out the Character Masterlist!

This is part of a collaboration I’m doing with @lilolpotato some fluff to counter some of the hate from the Sakusa Hate Night thing that was going around 😊💖 Also a huge huge thank you to the amazingly talented @yuujiscurse for the banner! Their work is amazing! 😊💖

You weren’t sure if they simply didn’t know you could hear them whispering or if they simply didn’t care, as you stood waiting for your boyfriend to emerge from the locker rooms. Hopefully you wouldn’t have to wait long, Sakusa was usually the first out due to insisting on showering before the others of the team could infect the space with their germs. Still today you hoped he would hurry, even faster than usual, so you could leave the receptionist and the woman she was talking to, likely someone who worked in the building, far behind you.

“What does he even see in her?” the woman who’d greeted you almost every time you’d entered the building with a saccharine smile that was apparently hiding a mouthful of venom whispered to her blond coworker.

“I certainly don’t see anything special,” the other woman, a pretty brunette agreed giving you a clear once over a blatantly dismissive look on her face, “She’s probably absolutely hideous behind that mask she wears all the time.”

Your hands balled into fists in your jacket, as you tried to ignore them, reminding yourself that you wore the mask for a reason. It was for both your comfort, and your boyfriends. Sakusa’s germaphobia was a very real fear, and frankly you didn’t mind doing a few things to accommodate his fear, or make him feel more comfortable where you could, especially since you knew he would and had done the same for you before.

Wearing a mask out in public was a simple thing, and frankly considering the pollution in Japan, not all that uncommon. The women were clearly being deliberately petty and you sank deeper into the jacket burrowing into it, and taking comfort in the familiar smell and feel of it. It was one of Sakusa’s old Itachiyama jackets, one he’d gifted to you when the two of you had first started dating.

It was warm and comfortable, and a blatant reminder of how very much your boyfriend cared about you. After all very few people were allowed to touch his things, and even fewer were given gifts, especially sentimental gifts. Komori had teased the two of you for days when Sakusa had first given it to you, exclaiming every time he saw you wearing it that even he had never been allowed to touch Sakusa’s Itachiyama jackets and he was his cousin.

It smelled like him, clean and crisp from the detergent he preferred to use for all of your clothing, one you’d become quite fond of yourself, and that you associated solely with him. It took your mind off the cruel women in front of you, at least for a little while.

“Can you believe just the other day he dropped his towel on accident, I tried to hand it to him, and he gave me the most disgusted look and just walked away,” the brunette told the receptionist clearly deeply offended by the incident, “As if I were something dirty he’d found on the bottom of his shoe.”

“I’ve tried to give him pens to use before,” the receptionist admitted equally huffy as she explained, “He won’t touch them, not until he disinfects them with a wipe first, and even then he’ll only hold them if he’s wearing gloves.”

You sighed quietly to yourself, a part of you wanting to storm over there and defend your boyfriend and an equal part understanding, just a bit where they were coming from. Sakusa had a fear, one that was very real to him, even if it seemed silly to others, and he had extreme ways of reacting when forced to face that fear. Still even you could admit sometimes his inability to properly interpret social cues could leave him coming off cold, or even cruel even if he didn’t mean to be that way.

“I bet she’s not even his girlfriend,” the spiteful brunette hissed, “Just an obsessed groupie who follows him around.”

“He probably treats her like trash,” the receptionist added in a cruel enjoyment to her unkind speculations, “Which is really no less than she deserves honestly.”

The women were clearly lashing out, and on the only target the had readily available, but that didn’t stop you from feeling hurt or furious on behalf of your boyfriend. How dare they insinuate he treated you badly? The idea was infuriating especially when you knew how very hard he tried for you.

Sure, your relationship wasn’t all smooth sailing, but then what relationship was? Yes, you’d had to exercise a lot of patience as Sakusa slowly worked himself up to touching you, but it had been completely and utterly worth it. The feeling of being held in his arms, knowing he desperately wanted you to be there, so much so that he fought off his worst fears in order to do so was indescribable. You’d honestly never felt as loved as you did when your germophobic boyfriend reached his hand out to you, assuring you that he wanted to be able to touch you.

Even several years in you still couldn’t cuddle without a thorough shower beforehand, and some aspects of physical intimacy, including public displays of affection were especially hard, but it was worth it. You were so proud, both of your boyfriend and how very far the two of you had come as a couple, and it infuriated you that these two women, who knew absolutely nothing of his struggles would dare to insinuate such awful things about him.

Oh, you knew they probably didn’t actually believe them. You’d dealt with jealousy from other women before. Your boyfriend was undeniably incredibly good looking, stunning even, and for some reason a lot of people found his supposedly aloof and cold demeanor cool and enticing. He’d had fans for as long as you’d known him.

Still it didn’t stop you from wanting to march right up to the women and force them to take it back. They could say what they wanted about you, but in no way shape or form would you allow them to badmouth your secretly dorky and completely socially inept boyfriend. Honestly one more word from them and you might’ve done just that, fortunately or unfortunately your furious thoughts were interrupted by the arrival of your boyfriend.

“Hey,” the sound of his voice pulled you from your murderous thoughts and turned your attention to Sakusa who had emerged from the locker rooms at last. His hair was still a little damp from his shower, the dark curls not quite as springy as they usually were as they fell across his forehead, and he was fully zipped into his Black Jackals jacket, hands in his pockets the traditional mask covering half his face, “let’s get going before the others come out.”

“Sure,” you agreed trying to keep your tone as upbeat and normal as possible ready to fall into step with him and head to the store, which was the whole reason you’d agreed to meet him at the Black Jackals usual practice gym in the first place.

However it seemed you hadn’t done a very good job of concealing the lingering upset from overhearing the women’s gossip session. That or your boyfriend was getting better at reading you, though both honestly were possibilities. He stopped in his tracks, forcing you to come to a halt as well, his brows sitting heavily over his dark eyes as he peered at you intently, clear concern visible in them.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, his voice taking on the clipped edge that let you know he was deeply concerned. Apparently, you’d been more obvious than you’d thought.

“Nothing,” you tried to assure him, forcing your tone to be upbeat, not wanting to drag him down, “Why would something be wrong?”

“Don’t lie to me,” he ordered, the words blunt, but the clear care in his tone taking any sting out of them. Honestly he had very little in the way of tact at times like these, something you should probably be annoyed by, but could only find strangely endearing.

“It really is nothing,” you assured him, your own tone softening at his clear concern for you, “Just overheard people gossiping about us again.”

“Were you upset by them?” he asked hesitantly, clearly peering into your eyes, his whole body fidgeting with restless energy, a tension to him that reminded you of a rubber band stretched and ready to snap. For all that many read him as uncaring you knew that Sakusa was extremely protective of the few people he allowed close to him, and that you were one of the privileged few. He was clearly ready and willing to tear verbal strips off anyone who’d dared upset you.

“Yes,” you told him, figuring honesty was probably the best policy at this point, “But only because they were saying untrue things about you, about how you treat me.”

Some of the tension in his shoulders relaxed at that, and his eyes softened. You couldn’t see his mouth because of the mask, but long familiarity let you know the corners would be curling up in relief,. He clearly didn’t care a bit what people said about him, an attitude you wished rather desperately that you could emulate.

“Let them say what they want,” he told you firmly, “It’s not something that bothers me, so don’t let it bother you.”

“If only it were that easy,” you told him your own lips curling into a wry smile.

Your eyes widened in surprise as he pulled one of his hands from his jacket pockets and gently took hold of your face, the warmth of his shockingly bare fingers on your skin making your heart flip over in your chest his thumb gently swiping across your cheekbone rendering you completely and utterly speechless.

“The only opinions about my person that I care about are opinions from people who matter to me,” he told you sincerity dripping from very word, “And the only opinion I care about when it comes to our relationship is yours.”

Your heart was beating a rapid tattoo against your ribs at his fervent declaration, especially since you knew he meant every word. Your boyfriend was nothing if not completely and utterly honest when it came to you, even brutal at times. He was never one who’d spare your feelings, which was how you knew moments like these were as raw and honest as it was possible to be.

“I love you Kiyoomi,” you told him a little helplessly, the words falling out of your mouth before you’d had a chance to really think about them.

“I love you too,” he responded without missing a beat, even if you could see the faintest of pink blushes decorating the tops of his cheekbones over the mask, “And I don’t like seeing you upset. What people say about me doesn’t bother me, so please don’t let it bother you.”

“But wouldn’t you be upset if people were saying things about me?” you pointed out reasonably, well aware he would be, as he’d proven many times over in the past.

He clearly couldn’t think of an argument to that and so instead remained silent, so you continued, “You mean so much to me Kiyoomi and it hurts to hear anyone might think poorly of you or insinuate cruel things about you and how you treat me that are blatantly untrue.”

He watched you with soft eyes, his thumb still gently tracing your cheek as he explained, “So long as those things don’t cause you to doubt me I could care less.”

“Never,” you assured him fervently, “I like to think that by now I know you pretty well Kiyoomi and I don’t think there’s anything ridiculous petty gossipers could to make me doubt you, to doubt us. Despite the fact that we’ve had our challenges I always felt like we fit well together. Like two pieces of a puzzle.”

“I’m glad,” he admitted freely, “I’ve always hoped that you’d felt the way I do.”

“The way you do?” you repeated curiously.

“Like you know you’re meant to be,” he told you the words stealing the breath from your lungs and you were fairly sure you forgot how to breathe entirely as he leaned forward to press a gentle masked kiss to your forehead.

Fortunately, or unfortunately you were pulled from your thoughts by raucous sounds from behind the two of you. It turned out you’d been so wrapped up in your conversation with your boyfriend you hadn’t noticed you were blocking the hallway and keeping the rest of the team as a captive audience of sorts. Apparently the private, intimate moment wasn’t nearly as private as you’d thought, and you were suddenly incredibly grateful the mask helped cover your cherry red cheeks.

Apparently Bokuto was the one who’d interrupted your moment, too moved by it to stay quiet any longer, and now the former Fukurodani Ace was fervently congratulating your poor boyfriend about how smooth he was. Sakusa looked incredibly put upon as the team swept you up with them as they left the building in a small herd, all of them gently teasing or congratulating the two of you on how very cute your relationship was.

In the midst of all the chaos your boyfriend managed to sneak his hand into yours, his fingers twining together to keep you close and connected to him. You accepted the gesture, feeling warm, and secure and completely and utterly loved, enough to shoot the poisonous receptionist and her bitter friend a blinding smile on your way out the door.

Sakusa was right. Their opinions, especially on your relationship, shouldn’t matter to you, at the end of the day you knew he loved you and that was more than enough.

#sakusa kiyoomi #sakusa fluff #love sakusa #sakusa love #sakusa x y/n #sakusa x reader #sakusa x you #sakusa kiyoomi x you #sakusa kiyoomi x reader #sakusa kiyoomi x y/n #haikyuu!!#haikyu imagines #haikyu fluff #haikyū!!#sakusa oneshot #JayeRayWrites

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nostuntmanneeded · 3 years

Note

I've thought about the 'jabs' a couple of times as well and while I don't exactly condone namecalling and that I do believe that people go out of line in a couple in situations, in my opinion, the ones specifically that were mentioned above like spoiled brat and things like that are not just plain petty and untrue remarks, because I can get where the frustration is coming from and that's a huge thanks to the long insightful tips. Try to go back to the recent thorough tip talking about Cultural Appropriation and the ones explaining what's wrong with her doing PR, it might help you understand things more. People are not calling her dumb because they think she's illiterate, she's being called dumb because the way she behaves is not on par with her age and the behavior of a person capable of acting and making decisions with good reason and responsibly and also has decent cognitive skills. She's not a child, she's a grown woman who is almost 30 years, she should know better. A reasonable person would know better than to make multitudes of unecessarry travels at the height of a global pandemic or at least know how to follow the protocols. Never forget that when she went back to the US, it hasn't even been a week upon arriving LA when she was found hiking outside and when she posted a picture of her at the cinema, it has been over a year since the pandemic started at that time, and she have made a lot of travels by then, you can't possibly tell me that she was not aware that she was supposed to isolate herself for two weeks. Even if for some insane reason, she truly was not aware if it, I wouldn't exactly call it wise and responsible to choose not to learn about the protocols of the country you're travelling to in the midst of a deadly and uncontrollable pandemic, and so is choosing to follow your boyfriend all the way to Prague and invite your manager and mom to follow you there like you're on some sort of vacation while they are on lockdown. The authorities and citizens are obviously scared for their health and safety, the lockdown was imposed for a reason, I'm pretty sure the last thing they want are tourists (who aren't properly wearing masks) roaming around while they're trying to keep things in control. I'd consider that dumb and inconsiderate. One thing I've learned from one of the tips is that you should not trivialize cultural appropriation as it's a complete disrespect and mockery to the oppressed people who owns the culture that is being appropriated. I can definitely see why people find her dumb for willingly participating in something like that, many people were just so hurt and infuriated that they find it unbelievable that someone would be capable of doing something like that simply found it insane and foolish. She's not a teenager, she's a grown woman well capable of identifying what is right and what is wrong, she needs to act her age and act responsibly. She's way too old to be this ignorant about a lot of things and not too old to know how to use technology at the same time, the internet is a vast and almost limitless platform to educate yourself, and it' free. It's not her friends or "boyfriend's" responsibility to teach her these things and to be the ones to make her take accountability she's old enough to know. "Dumb" doesn't even have to be necessarily an insult, sometimes there are just people who are essentially dumb and that's that. If she isn't dumb then I guess she must be fully cognizant of her actions, the consequences that comes with it and the amount of people that can possibly affected and hurt by her actions then and she's just consciously ignoring it and is deliberately choosing to be indifferent and selfish. Now, about the spoiled brat part, people are not calling her spoiled just because of the fact she's rich, she's being called spoiled because she's taking advantage of her privilege and making a career out of it. As mentioned before, it's one thing to use PR stunts to boost your career but to use it as the very foundation of your career is just unethical and unprofessional.

Pursuing a career as an artist is extremely exhausting in every sense of the word with all the drawbacks you have to deal with like financial issues, discouragement, anxiety, constant rejection and all that, artists go through a lot of shit, buying your way into an industry is a big insult to artist who basically beat themselves while trying to pursue artistry. Regardless if you tried to put some effort developing your skills, it doesn't change the fact that you cheated and that you possibly stole an oppotunity for someone who is way more deserving, it's such a privileged mindset and completely selfish. If you want to achieve something, do the work, and I mean all the work that is required, if you're really passionate about it you'd know for a fact that it would completely be worth it and that taking the long way instead of a shortcut would benefit and teach you more. I don't have that much to say about the talentless part because it's highly objective and talent is irrelevant to one's moral character but I think that comes from the people who've seen her work and was not impressed by it at all. Also the fact that she's using PR to build her career kinda implies that she herself is not convinced that she has talent, that she doesn't need to pull a stunt in order to be succesful because she's a capable person. Just my two cents.

Anon, you deserve to do a mic-drop!

While I'm not a fan of name-calling either, the names that were mentioned have a legitimate reason. They're not insults, but merely harsh criticisms at the things she's done and the things she continues to do.

This was perfectly said.

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mythicaldemigoddess-of-deltarune · 2 years

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Monster Funerals And Technically Rebirth In Dark World (Deltarune Theory)

first let me say that we know that in Undertale, Monsters have Funerals

have the dust of their love one, be thrown on their favorite item.

this could also be done in Deltarune, but it might take much longer for Monsters in Deltarune to turn into Dust, like perhaps up to 2 to 3 years.

in the meantime, the body will be placed in a Crystal Glass Coffin until it turns to dust and then the remains will be placed on the dearly departed’s favorite item.

in theory, in Undertale if a Monster had “fell down” by natural causes, the body of the monsters will take about a week or so to turn to dust.

but Alphys’s “treatments” to the Monsters that “fell down” may have prolonged it.

plus there is a possibility that the Monsters that became the Amalgamates,

had the same sickness as Rudy Holiday, it does make sense if you think about it.

Rudy might of had the early stage of the sickness and it was caught right away and he was able to be treated right away, and that is why he has to stay so long in the hospital.

but the counterparts in Undertale, the same sickness was not caught right away and it wasn’t treated properly by Alphys.

I don’t think it could be Covid, and I am glad that I only had that for a few days, though I didn’t know it was the reason I was sick.

I know that it was almost the next month when I started to get sick,

and it lasted for a few days and plus I think it was during when I was still sick that I had to do a type of home test to see if I have Covid, it was send to the people who gave us the news that we did in fact caught it.

and we were so careful before, we made sure to wear masks when we went out and everything, but we ended up catching it from some who weren’t careful.

I know I was given a few days of Quarantine, well at least it wasn’t a very long one....but I don’t go out much anymore anyway....

and knowing there is a dirty thief roaming around the town I live at, I rather not go out unless I need to, and always keep the doors locked.

and the dang cops around here better freaking do their job,

even if there are some cops who do their job well and there are some who shouldn’t even be allowed to weapons, there is such a thing as tranquilizers....

I believe that using tranquilizers might help save lives, even those who haven’t done anything extremely evil and can have a chance to change, but not if they that chance is taken away from them by shooting them with lethal force.

if a Cop does that to someone who has never killed someone and never plan to, and only take make some food to feed themself and their family,

then that Cop might not be seen as a Hero, if they want to make sure that person doesn’t do it again, then it’s best to take them and their family to a place that can service food to everyone who is in hard times or are homeless.

it might be better if there was some form of Modern Knight Officers, I know that some of my Ancestors were Knights, not just Kings and Queens.

Knight Officers could make sure that Police don’t misuse their power,

even if there are a few good eggs in there, there will always be a lot of corrupted ones that are the bad eggs, and yeah if some point this out as being untrue and all cops are bad, I know someone had send me a message before about it after the reply I made, can’t remember much about it...

but I know they were missing the point I was making,

I know there are bad cops, but there are good ones too, the one good ones don’t abuse or discriminate, but knowing some humans, this fact will perhaps misinterpreted and twisted, well not like I am very attracted to humans anyway...

I can still have crush or some attraction but how some humans are, isn’t very attractive....I am a Semi-Misanthrope but I still care about humanity and I know there are still good people in it.

anyway back to the whole sickness and monster funerals,

I believe that the sickness that Rudy has in Deltarune, might be the same as what caused the Amalgamates’s components to “fall down”, but it might be possible they weren’t really “falling down” and might of had the early stages of the sickness like Rudy, but they had been misdiagnosed.

misdiagnoses happen, you might not even realize until later on in your life, that you have been misdiagnosed by doctors.

I still believe that my seizures weren’t the kind that needed medicine,

and was the kind that was reacting to the energies of people and a place...

but if the counterparts of the Amalgamates in Deltarune, had died and their dust was placed on their favorite item, it is likely that if that item were to fall into the dark world, it will turn into them, having their memories and feelings.

the sad thing is, that they wouldn’t be able to leave the Dark World without turning back into their Favorite Item that they had when they were alive and still a Lightner.

if Dess Holiday did ended up dying, and her dust was placed on her favorite item and that item being a Ribbon Hair-Clip with a Bell on it and the said Hair-Clip ended up in Dark World and transformed into Dess,

but if she tries to leave the Dark World, she will not be her anymore and will turn into a Ribbon Hair-Clip.

this could be for any Monster who ends up dying and their dust is placed on their favorite item and if that item falls into any land of the Dark World,

that item will take the form of the Monster that died and have all their memories.

if travel between the two alternate reality universes are possible,

if some of Asriel’s dust (from Undertale) fell through a portal to that alternate reality and fell into Kris’s Favorite Item, that item being the horn headband,

it could turn into Asriel, who for all we know could be the Ralsei we see in Chapter 2 of Deltarune, I can’t help but think there is a possibility that the Ralsei we meet in Chapter 1 might still be in the Card Kingdom and can’t get through the door because the Ralsei that appears in Chapter 2, had locked it so the Ralsei that Kris and Susie met in Chapter 1, wont get through and reveal that they are technically a fake.

even if Ralsei seems the same, he isn’t, sure he might act like adorable cinnamon roll but there is no way he could of grown a few inches in just one night, even if days and a year or so passed in the real world, time passes differently in the game world.

so there is no way that Ralsei just became taller than Kris overnight,

I believe that the Ralsei that we meet in Castletown, is a fake or some kind of other version of the Fluffy Cinnamon Roll.

yes I and other fans have suspected that Ralsei might secretly be a villain,

or is tricked by the Knight, like either truly being bad or being used as a pawn.

but if the Ralsei we see in Chapter 1 and the him that is in Chapter 2 are two different Ralsei, the theory about a Ralsei being secretly a villain could be true....it’s just not the Ralsei we first meet in Chapter 1.

for all we know, the Ralsei we meet in Chapter 2 could be a Anti-Villain.

in Chapter 1, Ralsei is around the same height as Kris,

but in Chapter 2, Ralsei somehow becomes taller than Kris.

then there is his odd behavior that shows most of the time in Chapter 2, that perhaps gives hints that he is not the same Ralsei....

Ralsei wont hug or comfort us, if we don’t hug him when taking the picture when on the boat ride, plus when after leaving the room and basement we fight and possibly spare Spamton in, when Susie walks over to Kris...

Ralsei does something strange, like he all of a sudden starts to float in midair.

Susie might not notice this, but both the Player and Kris does...

plus the conversation that Ralsei has with Kris on the boat ride, might also be another hint that he is not the same Ralsei that we encountered in Chapter 1.

if the theory that there being more than one Ralsei is true, which by the way that would be the best fan prediction of all time.

the Ralsei we meet in Chapter 2, might be the Ralsei that belonged in the Card Kingdom, while the Ralsei we meet in Chapter 1, had belonged to the place where all Darkners from different Dark Worlds can live together without fear of turning to stone.

which is Castletown....

if a Darkner was originally a Lightner but had their dust placed on their favorite item and that item fell into the Dark World, it is possible they might turn to stone statues if they try to go to other Dark Worlds that is not of their Dark World where they had their Rebirth.

if they had their rebirth at the Castletown, then it is possible they could be able to travel to to other dark worlds without ending up turned into statues.

Boss Darkners might be a exception, Ralsei in Chapter 2 or as I like to call him Falsei, he never turned to a statue once or even by half like Sir Roulx Karrd.

this might be because he is a Boss Darkner, much like the True-Ralsei we meet in Chapter 1.

Boss Darkners can’t turn into statues if they leave their home Dark Worlds/Lands of their birth, not unless they spend more time in a Dark World they don’t belong in.

it would just take them much longer to end up turning to stone statues,

like maybe if they spend a year in a dark world that they weren’t originally born in, they would perhaps end up turning to stone during the New Year.

the only way a Boss Darkner can be safe from that fate, is if they live in Castletown.

if time works different in the Deltarune, and the True-Ralsei from Chapter 1 is trapped in Card Kingdom, then it is possible he still has time before he turns to a statue, if time passed the same way in real world, then he would of been a stone statue by now.

if the door that leads between the Castletown and Card Kingdom were to break, then the two Dark Worlds could merge into one and still be a neutral place for Darkners from different Dark Worlds.

we can rule out Lancer and his Dad & Possibly Mom, being Boss Darkners.

because Lancer did turn to a statue, and if you push him towards the table, he will get spaghetti, Papyrus might be the Spaghetti Lord and blessed Lancer with spaghetti for all we know.

most Darkners might not be of Tulpa birth, and some might of originally been Lightners and only end up being reborn as Darkners, because they had died and their dust ended up being placed on their favorite item that belong to them when they were alive.

the former lightner turned darkner monster, would have all the memories they had when they were alive and a lightner, but if they try to leave the dark world and go to the light world, they will turn into their favorite item and go into a type of hibernation.

but they will come out of hibernation once they return back to the Dark World or any Dark World really.

I’m sure some might of seen the awesome AU comic called Paper Trail by LynxGriffin.

who ended in a way ended up predicting what most of the stuff that was going to happen in Chapter 2 of Deltarune, like from the turning to Statues and when a Darkner leaves the Dark World they will turn into objects and Items.

and will possibly go to a hibernation type state.

no matter if a Darkner was originally born in the Dark World or if they were originally a Lightner and when they died their dust was placed on their favorite item and that said item fell into the dark world and turned into them with all their memories.

the same laws will imply to even former Lightners, who can only keep their new body while in the Dark World but if they try to leave they will turn into the object that their dust was placed on.

it is possible that there is a entrance to the Dark World in Undertale,

like you know that big hole in the True Lab that is in the same room as that Determination Extractor, that might be a entrance to the Dark World.

like even though Undertale and Deltarune are two different realities and timelines with different outcomes, it might be possible one to travel from to the other by either the broken machine in Sans’s not so secret lab, or by falling through the hole in the True Lab.

Gaster fell into his creation and was scattered through time and space,

so it is possible each piece of himself ended up in different places in different dark worlds.

Undertale and Deltarune are two different worlds, realities and timelines with different outcomes.

one of the predictions in Deltarune that I hope is true,

is that it was Humans who ended up in Underground, and the entrance being behind that red door that you can find in those woods.

and with how some humans are in real life, I wouldn’t be surprised if we all did end up being banished underground....come on, you know it’s true...

even if there are still some good humans around the world...

but according to some about the whole blood type I and others have,

we wouldn’t be considered human.

don’t know when I can try to check my blood type again, to test if it will come out the same again, but if it comes out as O RH D Negative again for a third time, I will accept it fully as my true blood type.

yeah there is talk about the whole RH Negative being either Alien or Angel heritage, but my theory is that most of humanity’s heritage comes from Andromeda and some of the heritage is from here.

so the whole Alien theory might not be far off from being true.

I can’t agree that humans are the only sentient bipedal lifeforms able to think and speak, though some aren’t able to speak but that doesn’t mean they don’t think or feel like everyone else.

there could be other lifeforms out there, some might not be earthling kidnappers who abduct humans for the fun of it or for illegal experimentation.

how are they not arrested by some form of Space Police by now...?

if my pendulum wasn’t pulling a prank on me, I would fully believe that the Aliens from Mass Effect and Halo Game series are Real In Real Life.

don’t think it will stop that prank giving a Yes reply to them being real, anytime soon....and now that Halo series’s Aliens are added to the mix, I wouldn’t be surprise if I get another Yes when I ask again about them being Real In Real Life.

though a part of me hopes it ain’t a prank, and it is true.

if Non-Humans can become Presidents, I hope a Asari or Female Krogan becomes the first Non-Human President.

you know some Male Krogans can’t because of certain reasons,

sure there can be some who can become a Non-Human President,

but we know how the Male Species behaves, so trusting the Female Species to become a President is a lot safer.

it ain’t sexist, if you played or even watch a walkthrough of Mass Effect games,

you will know that it is the Female Krogans that aren’t as battle happy as the males, and there can be some percent of Male Krogans that wont be battle happy as well and some of them will become scientist or engineers or healers.

even if the Asari do appear female in Mass Effect, that is not fully true.

Asari are Monogender and their gender identity is either Feminine or Masculine.....even if they appear Female, their gender identity could end up being Masculine.

some Asari will go by She/Her or He/Him, and there could be Nonbinary Asari that could go by both She/Her & They/Them or He/Him & They/Them,

or just go by They/Them.

the Asari in Mass Effect, are able to have a child with any Alien Species of any gender.

if a Asari were to have a child with a Human that is Nonbinary, they might not want to go by “Father” or even “Mother” and might go by Renny instead.

there are some who are Nonbinary that may go by Father or Mother if they become a parent, but it would be a Nonbinary-Parent and not the Binary-Parent.

not all Nonbinary will be the same, and well I hope some of you understand what I’m trying to explain.

anyway back to the whole Deltarune theory,

I believe that it is possible that a Lightner Monster can become a Darkner Monster if when they die and their dust that contain their essence and memories end up placed on their favorite item and that said item falls into the Dark World, it will take on the form of that Monster and have all the memories.

they can’t leave the Dark World without turning into the favorite item they had owned in their life as a Lightner.

I still believe that the Dark Fountain Portal in the Library was created by “Kris”

or the third entity, it is possible that Kris has a split personality and their soul split into two at some point either before or after the Player came into the picture.

the Good half of Kris’s Soul, which I believe is a Turquoise-Blue color,

is the Kris we have to help and have go through a true pacifist route.

and it is that Kris we the Player’s Red Proxy-Soul has a Symbiotic relationship with and we can only see what the good half of Kris sees.

the Other-Kris who takes out the Red Soul, we can only see them or the room they were formerly in, but if they leave the room we can’t see what they are up to.

whatever the Other-Kris does, it might be without the Player or Kris’s knowledge.

I believe that when the Other-Kris takes full control, the Kris we known at the start of Chapter 1, their Soul goes into a type of hibernation.

it is possible in the bathroom scene in Chapter 2, where Kris was suppose to wash their hands, when the Other-Kris pulls out our Red Proxy-Soul out and put it back in after they finish what they were doing when they sneaked out of the bathroom window....

Kris might of thought they had either fell asleep or spaced out.

the Other-Kris might be the only half of the split soul, that is aware of the Good-Kris, the one that is Susie’s true friend.

it is possible that the Original-Kris before their Soul Split into two forms,

wasn’t always a Angel and like how some in the game have hinted, was mischievous and had a very dark sense of humor.

Noelle has known them much longer than Susie, as they were in a way childhood friends....

the Kris we know now is the one we first met in Chapter 1,

who could still be a prankster but not the same as their Original-Self.

the only one who carries the original personality, would be the Other-Kris but in perhaps a more darker version of it.

in theory without the Player’s Red Proxy-Soul, the Other-Kris will perhaps take full control and cause misery to Kris.

the job of the player can try to help Kris (Not The Other-Kris) to make friends and give everyone a happy ending in each chapter of Deltarune.

but if we choose to go down the Geno Route, we are playing in not just the Knight’s hands but also the Other-Kris’s hands as well.

if there can be two Ralsei, then there can be two Kris...

we only end up meeting the Other-Kris at the very end of Chapter 1, and we see them again when we return from our journey through the other Dark World.

also it is important to save in the Dark World, before going back to Kris’s House, that way what you did in Chapter 2 will be remembered in Chapter 3.

though I wonder what would happen if you play Chapter 2 first and then Chapter 1 and then go back to Chapter 2...?

I still want to see if I can’t get Noelle’s watch in a Pacifist Run.

she does deserve to know that what happen in the Dark World wasn’t a dream, not just in the Geno Route.

also if it is true that Noelle is Transgender, her deadname

could be Noel Holiday, but if she isn’t transgendered, she might be one of the type of female deer that do end up having antlers.

this might mean that Dess and Noelle’s parents could be two different type of Monster Deer, one coming from the species where the Female Deer don’t have antlers when they mature, while the other does.

there is a possibility that Dess never had antlers like the Fan AU versions of her does.

so it is either because Noelle inherited the genetics from either her father or mother, that comes from some Female Deer having antlers, or there is another possibility that Noelle is in fact a Transgirl.

we need to wait to see if such a thing is confirmed in the future.

for all we know, Dess might not even be a Monster at all and like Kris, was a Human who was adopted into a Monster Family, but was adopted way before Kris came into the picture.

if Dess was a Human adopted by the Holidays,

they are the first human in the canon, to be confirmed to be female and being both the daughter of the Mayor & Rudy Holiday, and the Big Sister of Noelle.

if they were human and not a monster, they could still end up in the Dark World with their body back, but if they try to leave their body will turn into their Human Soul but they will not go into a type of hibernation.

if a Lightner Human dies and their Heart Soul ends up in the Dark World,

they (like the Darkner Monsters) will be given a new physical body and will be technically reborn as a darkner, but I guess would technically be a Twilightner.

but if the now Darkner Human tries to leave the Dark World,

they will lose their physical body and be turned into their Heart shaped Soul,

the only way they can get their physical body back, is if they return to the place of their rebirth, which happens to be the Dark World.

so no matter if Dess Holiday is a Human or Monster, if her Soul or Dust Covered Favorite Item ends up in the Dark World, she will gain a new physical body back that will have the same appearance but with Darkner clothes and their hair and skin changing to a different palette in the dark world.

but if Human or Monster Dess tries to leave to go back to see her family,

she will either transform back into a Heart-Soul (Human-Dess) or into her favorite item (Monster-Dess) that her family The Holidays had placed her dust on when she left the world.

if Dess is a human who was adopted by the Holidays, she might of came from a abusive and unloving human family and was very young when Mayor and Rudy took her in and saved her from her Ex-Family, and Noelle might not of been born yet.

if Dess was human, she might of been the only human that Noelle wasn’t scared of, even if Kris did scare Noelle at times, Noelle could still care about Kris.

so yeah my new theory is that Dess Holiday was a Human who was adopted by the Holidays, and if possible maybe in the Dark World she could appear as a Deer Monster like the rest of her family, as it could be a place of wishes and wanting to be how you see as your true self.

not everyone has to agree about the theory that Dess was in fact a human adopted by the Holidays, but I’m still gonna believe it is possibly true.

and Dess either having died or went missing, could of still ended up in one of the Dark Worlds, possibly from a portal that Gerson created with his hammer.

I can talk later about the theory about Gerson’s hammer and how it was the first to be used to create a portal to the dark worlds and how it might be linked to either the death or disappearance of Dess Holiday.

right now I have to go and eat, so see ya later and stay safe everyone.

#deltarune theory #lightners #darkners #asriel dreemurr #ralsei deltarune #undertale theory #deltarune spoilers #dess holiday #read more #do not reblog without permission

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twdmusicboxmystery · 3 years

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How Scars MIGHT Relate to Leah and Daryl

Okay Everyone, this is a post that I wrote like 6-7 months ago. It was after we learned about Leah and 10x18, but before the episode actually aired. It was really just conjecture on my part. Me, trying to connect patterns and similarities I was seeing.

Why didn’t I post it back then? Because we decided we thought Leah was a hallucination, and at that point, I thought this less likely to pan out.

What I’ll say now is that, if she IS real, this may still be true. And if she isn’t, this pattern may hold but it might be about some other character, other than her.

Even if it turns out to be completely untrue, just see this as patterns I’m seeing that may come into play in the future. And I wanted to post this today, before ep 1 airs and ep 2 shows up on AMC+.

Also, someone sent me this yesterday:

Norman saying there’s some double agent stuff going on DOES suggest she might be a villain. It’s hard to interpret exactly what he meant by that, but this is one possibility. So here’s what I wrote to my fellow theorists several months back:

Here’s what I have to say about Scars, and I’m still grappling for how best to frame this, so I’m sorry if it meanders a bit. And honestly, it’s nothing super ground-breaking. It’s a lot of what we’ve already talked about concerning Leah, and it comes from what you found about the “masks” lines in the Michonne/Zeke convo, as well as between Daryl and Michonne in Scars. I’m really just giving more evidence for this and predicting a future storyline. You know, like I do. ;D

And one thing I will say is that, while I WANT to tie this to Leah because both her storyline and Jocelyn’s happened during the 6 year time jump, I’m not 100% sure this even has to do with Leah. It might, but it also might not. So, I think this is a coming storyline one way or the other. But it may have to do with Leah or may be completely independent of her. No way to tell, yet.

So, in both conversations (both between Michonne and Zeke and Michonne and Daryl on the swings) they talk about people wearing figurative masks. Daryl specifically talks about someone who has so much evil in their hearts that they actually lie about who they are and present themselves in one way, as one type of person, when really they’re the opposite.

We see this theme played out all through Scars, because obviously Jocelyn did that. But now that I’m alert to it, I’m seeing it a lot. Even in 10x17, the Sniper fell under this theme. Mostly literally in his case because he was wearing camouflage (a kind of mask) to hide out and kill people. But figuratively, that’s kinda what Jocelyn did, too.

Okay, so let me start at the beginning. I’ve watched Scars twice now and I’m thinking more and more that the thing with Jocelyn happened BEFORE Leah. Now that we know Daryl’s story spans 5 of the 6 years, I think Leah must happen after Jocelyn. Michonne is big and pregnant, so Scars can’t be more than 6 mos after Rick disappeared.

Michonne asking Daryl if he’s okay being alone definitely hints at the Leah storyline (another reason to link Leah and Jocelyn). But I think it’s a jumping off point for his story. Because he tells Michonne he’s okay being alone, and in that moment, I think he really is. Or at least he really believes he is. The story with Leah will be him realizing he really doesn’t want to be alone. Romantically or otherwise. Which pushes him back toward TF when Carol comes knocking with Henry.

But let’s get to the good stuff.

After Jocelyn shows up, she tells Michonne that some of her kids aren’t with her and she wants to go get them. Jocelyn is hurt and Michonne’s about to pop, so neither of them go. But this is interesting. The three people who go to get her kids in the one building are Gabriel, Aaron, and Eugene.

It was Eugene that really caught my eye. I started going, “hmm. What could this foreshadow?” And I don’t know the answer in detail, but I think it may foreshadow his entanglement with Beth’s return in some way. And of course Aaron and Gabe are both major proxies for Beth, with Gabe being the resident Sirius character. So yeah, kind of side-eyeing that.

The next thing is that we see two hand-drawn posters detailing, through pictures, how to skin and drain both a deer and a rabbit. These are things Jocelyn has obviously made to teach the kids to survive. And I know we noticed them before, with the deer and rabbit being big Beth symbols. But I’m seeing a much bigger theme, having watched the episode several times.

The poster of the deer shows the deer strung up by its legs (head pointed down, I assume). Then, after they bring all the kids to Alexandria, we see several deer strung up this way, and Michonne comments that Jocelyn’s kids are amazing hunters. So, we learn that two of them, Winnie, the blond, and Linus, one of the boys, killed the deer and even prepared them for everyone at Alexandria.

But here’s where it gets more interesting. When Jocelyn captures Daryl and Michonne, she strings them up over pipes in exactly the way the deer being slaughtered are strung up. And of course she brands them like animals. So, in a way, they’re meant to be the deer that she’s going to slaughter.

And I’m not even sure exactly what to make of that where the deer symbol is concerned. I thought about how killing the deer does keep people from the danger of starving to death, so it fits with Deer = Tractor = getting rid of the threat, as I discussed HERE. But I also wonder if deer is synonymous with captivity in some way.

Then there’s the rabbit. I have less to say about it except that the biggest place we saw rabbits were around Lizzie and Mica. And the poster specifically lays out how to kill a rabbit, which is what Lizzie did to Mica. And I think it works here because we’re dealing with evil kids. Like Lizzie. (I will have more to say about the rabbit theory next week. We’ll see them in a big way in 11x01.)

This is where I’m going to link it to the good twin vs evil twin theme. Remember I talked about this with Noah’s twin brothers and of course Lizzie and Mica, even though they aren’t twins. I don’t think we have to have twins or even siblings for this theme, though it’s common for them to do it with siblings like Lizzie/Mica and even Daryl/Merle. Back in S4, there was Pete and his brother as well.

It occurred to me that we have a representation of it here, with Michonne/Judith on one side and Jocelyn/Winnie on the other. Sorry to go racial, but even the ethnicities match up. Michonne, a black woman with a Caucasian daughter (Judith) who isn’t biologically hers (good). And Jocelyn, a black woman with a Caucasian daughter (Winnie) who isn’t biologically hers (evil). See what I mean?

One scene that really jumps out at me is when Michonne and Jocelyn talk in the kitchen. Jocelyn goes out of her way to REALLY earn Michonne’s trust in that scene. Michonne even says, “I’m so glad you’re here,” so she’s obviously fully trusting and loving having her friend around. This is the biggest place where we see Jocelyn’s “mask.”

Then, when Michonne and Daryl are on the swings, Michonne says, “she was a friend. Like, a real one.” She talks about how they’d been through a lot together before, like heartbreak, losing parents, etc. And then she says, “I wanted it to be that way again. I believed her. I let my guard down. I should have known. Should have sensed something.”

Okay, so many ways I could go with that. First of all, it’s REALLY close to what Carol said about Lizzie. “I should have seen it. It was already there.” So, another link to Lizzie/Mica.

But I was also thinking that I can see Daryl thinking this about Leah. Like, he wanted to believe that she would stay with him, that he could love her, but it was all just a mask.

Okay, that may feel like it came out of left field, but it’s essentially where I’m going with this. Let me keep going and I’ll circle back.

When Scars first aired, I said I thought Jocelyn was an anti-Beth parallel. I don’t think many people agreed with me, but I believe that more than ever. And @wdway’s X/Chevron stuff actually backs it up. My biggest reasoning, originally, was just all the child/baby stuff around Beth. I can see her doing something similar to this—raising an army of mini-Daryls—but of course she would be good and raise them with good values. Jocelyn will be a foil to her.

Watching it again, there are SO many Beth symbols around this Jocelyn story. There’s the deer and rabbit, which I’ve mentioned. At one point, Gabriel is telling a story to all of Jocelyn’s kids, and he covers one of his eyes, showcasing only his Sirius eye. We have Eugene going to find the kids. And of course, the X-shaped brands in Michonne and Daryl’s backs, which is where the Chevron stuff comes in.

So, one way or the other, I feel like this is a foreshadow of something to do with Beth and/or her return.

Then, at the end, I paid close attention to what Michonne says to Judith, and I picked up on a few things that had never registered for me before. Remember that, in this episode, they juxtapose these Jocelyn flashbacks with Daryl coming to Alexandria with Lydia and Henry, and Michonne doesn’t want them to stay, but Judith does, etc. And at the end, Judith takes off on her bicycle and Michonne has to go find her.

So, at the end, they’re sitting on the rock together and Michonne is telling Judith about the Jocelyn situation. She says that when Judith came out of the trailer, it “was like you were looking right at me and didn’t know it was me. I thought you’d changed, or that I’d lost you.” (Emphasis mine.)

Think about that. It’s a really odd thing to say about a two- or three-year-old kid. Like she thought Judith had turned evil or something. And I think plot-wise, she means that she thought Judith would think differently of her because she’d just killed all these kids. Michonne had a lot of guilt about that. But it’s a really odd wording, and kind of hearkens back to the mask symbol. People wearing masks, appearing to be something they aren’t.

We’ve also discussed extensively the idea of Beth’s memory loss: (X, X.) Maybe her seeing Carol but not knowing who she is, or Daryl seeing or hearing Beth but not believing it’s really her. It just sort of plays into the whole hallucination theme obliquely.

Judith then says that Michonne just didn’t look like herself because of all the blood, but after a moment, she saw it was her. So, more masks. And Michonne was kind of right. At first, Judith really didn’t recognize her, or at least thought she looked like someone else. More of the same theme.

But that bicycle is a big deal. It’s showcased obviously in the episode, and bikes almost always represent kidnapping or captivity. We saw them around Glenn in S1 when he was taken by the Vatos gang. We saw one outside the Claimer house when Rick got away. I feel like this foreshadows Judith being kidnapped. She already was once by Jocelyn. But Michonne sees that bike in the present-day scenes, which makes them a foreshadow, not a callback.

So, I’ll be the first to admit that this is mostly speculation and at least half head canon, but I’m really wondering if Leah and Beth will be the good and evil to one another. (This is obviously going to be the case in terms of a good/healthy vs unhealthy romantic relationships. And if Leah is a hallucination, and Beth will obviously be real, you can already see how they’re doing this with Beth and Leah.)

Leah is wearing a mask when Daryl is with her. And once again, she may not be totally evil like Jocelyn was. But she may be misrepresenting herself in some way. Toxic at the least, evil at the most. But maybe the reason she’s practically wearing Beth’s clothes is that she’s a foil or anti-parallel to Beth.

And you see what I mean about how, if Leah turns out to be a hallucination, clearly this won’t apply to her in a literal way.

I still think there’s a good chance she’s a hallucination, but I think this still applies. It wouldn’t be literal or physical if that’s the case, but she’s still the “bad” relationship as opposed to the good one Daryl will have with Beth. We all talked extensively about how unhealthy the relationship was right after 10x18 aired. How Leah gave him an ultimatum, didn’t seem to want to meet his family, etc. So, you can see that, real or not, the relationships will be juxtaposed, with one being good and the other, bad.

The other thing want to mention is that it’s interesting that they did this story (Scars) with Michonne instead of Daryl. It makes me think that something about Michonne and Rick’s reunion story might follow this template as well.

We’ve discussed how Leah might be part of the New Mexico symbolism, and I’ve had people message me that they’re afraid that when Daryl and Carol take off together for the spinoff, he’ll be looking for Leah. Now, I obviously don’t think he would be looking for her in a romantic/looking-for-Beth sort of way, but it’s possible that she may be involved.

And like I said at the beginning, I think there’s a good chance of parallels between Leah and Jocelyn, because they both happened during the 6-year time jump, and then there’s all the other ties like, “are you okay being alone,” the mask theme, and that Carol knew about her/the acorn conversation.

I’m actually thinking this less and less, now. I really don’t think the New Mexico symbolism will be fulfilled until the spinoff, and we already know Leah will be in s11. So, I suppose if she survives S11 (and depending on whether she’s real or not) she COULD still be involved, but the timelines just don’t seem to match up to me. At least, not right now. This may change depending on what S11 brings us.

So, total conjecture here, but I’m really wondering if Leah (or if not her, someone else Jocelyn foreshadowed) will kidnap Judith, and that’s why Daryl and Carol leave to go after her. It would fit with the TWB template for Daryl and Carol (Felix and Huck on TWB) to be following Judith (Hope and Iris on TWB). If so, Daryl might really might be following Leah to New Mexico, but not out some romantic inclination, but rather because she took the kids.

Another possibility, of course, is that Leah is real, but Daryl was drugged or is just remembering things wrong. If that ends up being the case, then this could still happen. But again, we’ll just have to wait and see.

So yeah. Let’s just say I have plenty of head canons filed away in which Beth kicks some evil Leah butt. I would enjoy that very much. :D Granted, it probably won’t play out quite that neatly for us, but that’s what head canons are for, right?

And as I said, I can’t be sure this has to do with Leah. It’s possible this storyline is completely independent of Leah, and she’ll be something else entirely. But I think something like this will happen either way. And I’m sure I’ll recognize it as fulfillment when it does.

Any thoughts?

#beth greene #beth greene lives #beth is alive #beth is coming #td theory #td theories #team delusional #team defiance #beth is almost here #bethyl

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clumsyclifford · 3 years

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Rian helping Alex to dye his hair!! And complain how it'll fall out and stuff just to mask how pretty he thinks it's gonna look

alright anon here it is! my rilex debut. i hope it does not disappoint. also full disclosure i have had my hair dyed Once for me and my friends did it and i do not remember most of what happened so while i did do some light google searches please suspend disbelief if and when you must

read it here on ao3

Rian should know more about dyeing hair. It seems impossible for him to have been in a band with Jack and Alex for this long and not pick up on the basics, at least. Standing in a CVS, Rian feels confident that he should know this.

"Should" being the operative word.

Finally he calls Alex.

"I forgot which brand you said," he tells Alex when he gets yeah?

"I texted it to you, you moron," Alex replies. He sounds very fond. It's always fun to hear Alex try and be bitchy when he's really just being fond.

Sighing, Rian pulls his phone away from his ear and checks his texts. "No you didn't."

"I definitely did." Pause. "Oh, it didn't go through. Whoops."

"Who's a moron now?"

"Still you. I told you the name like fifty times. Okay, it sent. If you get the wrong color, no offense but our friendship is over."

"Gotcha," says Rian. "So was it bright orange or more of a burnt umber that you wanted?"

Alex hangs up on him. A minute later he calls back.

"Love you," he says.

Rian rolls his eyes and grins. "Love you."

"Isn't it kind of disrespectful to do this in a hotel room bathroom?"

Alex doesn't stop setting up the hair dye supplies on the sink, but he does shoot a dry look towards Rian. "Yeah, duh. But it's just hair dye. Worst case scenario it stains the tub or something."

"Or the floor," Rian puts in. "Or your hair all burns off from the bleach and you sue and then there's a whole court case. That'd be pretty bad for them."

"But dope for me," Alex says. "So wins all around."

Not wins for the hotel, Rian doesn't say. He's not sure why he's bothering to try and convince Alex that they shouldn't do this. Not only is Alex thoroughly unable to be convinced, Rian doesn't even think he believes himself.

It's just, Alex is dyeing his hair blue.

Rian tries not to form opinions, like, about Alex in specific, because in general his opinion is wow and good-looking and would love to kiss him and AHHHHH, and those opinions don't really change with Alex's look. Even in the most emo of Alex's hair days, Rian had been very much extremely attracted to him, and Alex has only gotten cuter since then. It will probably become a problem eventually. Rian suspects it might already be a problem that he's just ignoring very effectively.

It's not like he only likes Alex for his looks. Alex has lots of wonderful qualities, and Rian could easily wax poetic for hours. It's just that it would probably be easier not to fall in love with him if he was a little less what they in the music business called Fucking Gorgeous.

But no dice. Obviously.

All of which to say: helping Alex dye his hair blue cannot possibly end well for Rian. Alex has yet to do blue, but Rian is one hundred percent sure it's going to look as good as all the other colors have, and he's just going to find himself speechless for a couple minutes again. Which hadn't been a problem before, when Alex had gotten Jack to do it with him, but for some reason this time he's enlisted Rian, and Rian has yet to find within himself the capacity to refuse anything Alex requests, within (and sometimes without) reason.

Speaking of which: "Why isn't Jack helping you with this? Don't you think he'd be, like, a thousand times more competent? I mean, I wouldn't usually say that about Jack, but this is so not my area of expertise."

Alex huffs, opening the box of dye. "Well, for starters, Jack is busy with Zack, and they are probably banging and/or playing a board game and/or getting wasted and/or doing things that I can't even fathom because Jack and Zack are ineffable," which takes Rian a long moment to process but none of which is technically implausible or untrue, "and second, I wanted your help."

"Yeah, no, I got that when you told me you wanted my help," Rian says dryly. "What I'm wondering is why."

Alex frowns in judgement as he mixes the dye. "What's with all the questions? I just like hanging out with you, man. Do I need a better reason?"

Rian clears his throat. "Uh. I guess not."

"Damn right." Alex gives Rian a smile, and a small part of Rian melts, and he thinks about how much of a naive idiot he's been that he didn't realize how much of a problem this would be until right now. When it's too late. "Okay. Gloves on, Ri. It's gonna get messy up in here."

There's no way that innuendo is unintentional, and Rian is a sucker because he blushes anyway.

Apparently it's just a matter of painting. Which is much easier said than done. Not because painting dye onto hair is particularly challenging, but because Rian painting dye onto Alex's hair is, well.

"One of these days you're gonna lose all your hair," he says at one point, mostly to distract himself from the look on Alex's face as he works the dye through his hair with his crinkly-plastic-gloved fingers. That look is putting Rian's mind in places it should not be.

Fortunately, this comment alters it, and Alex opens his eyes. "I don't dye my hair that much."

Rian gives him a critical look. "Yeah, but still. This stuff can't be good for you. Even if you don't use it a lot."

"You know what else isn't good for me?" Alex says seriously. "Alcohol. Tattoos. Sex before marriage. Rebellion is hot. What kind of punk rocker are you?"

"I'm sorry it's not punk to be worried about your friends," Rian replies. "Doesn't it burn your head?"

"Nah," Alex says, closing his eyes again. "Feels nice."

"How the fuck does putting — I don't even know what's in this stuff — feel nice?"

"It's more about the experience," Alex says around a smile. "You putting the dye in my hair, it feels nice."

Awesome. Rian's fine.

"Oh," he mumbles, and then decides that not talking is in his best interest.

Rian is thorough with his task. If that means he goes twice through all of Alex's hair, it's because he's being extra careful.

(By the second time, Alex has begun humming along to the Motion City Soundtrack song playing from his phone on the sink top, and Rian is distracted for a little (long) while.)

With the shower cap on, Alex actually looks kind of dumb, which is a relief. The timer is nearly done ticking down from thirty minutes and Paramore is singing about how the camera's lying as Alex stares at himself in the mirror, using a washcloth to wipe off the smudges of rogue dye on his forehead.

Rian should stop watching, but there's something very captivating about the intensity of Alex's demeanor. It's not about what he's doing so much as the manner in which he's doing it, and God, Rian would give all the money in the world for Alex to look at him with that same attentiveness, even though he would probably just disintegrate if it ever did happen.

Rian was once a dignified man. He's not sure what happened but he's certain it's Alex's fault.

"Hey, Ri," Alex says. "Can you help me with this? I can't get this fucking dye off my face."

You're doing fine, Rian absolutely does not say, and instead says, "Yeah, sure. Although you might wanna think about just leaving it. I really think you could start a trend with this."

"Yeah?" Alex says, passing off the wet washcloth to Rian. "What, a trend of wearing hair dye on your face?"

"Dyed face is the new dyed hair," Rian says, grinning. He hesitates for a moment and then resigns himself to what he knows has to happen. "Don't move or talk or breathe or anything like that," he tells Alex, sliding a hand around Alex's neck to keep his head in place.

"Don't breathe?"

"What did I just say about talking and breathing?" Rian holds up the washcloth like a weapon. "Shut your mouth."

Alex presses his lips together and mimes locking them. He slips the imaginary key down the front of Rian's shirt. Rian snorts and begins his efforts to clean the dye off Alex's face. It's probably not going to go away for a little while, and they'll need to cover it with makeup, and Rian knows that, and surely Alex knows that too, so he's not sure why they're even bothering with this.

But. The position they've found themselves in is as compromising as it is tempting; Rian keeps his eyes firmly on the washcloth in his hands so they don't flit around Alex's face or land too often on his mouth. He could give himself away far too easily right now.

(He would like to. He would love to. If he kissed Alex right now, would Alex kiss him back? Would Alex have put them in this position as a joke? Is Alex a heartless monster or just a friend who thinks they're just friends? Are they just friends? Do they have to be? Could hair dye be mixed with glue to make colorful glue or does it only work on hair? All these questions and more crowd Rian's mind. It's a wonder he ever gets anything done.)

Eventually, though, Rian has to admit he's not going to get this dye off Alex's skin, and he doesn't want to hurt Alex. He sighs and drops his hand to his side, curling the washcloth in his fist. "Sorry, Al. You're gonna have to start that trend whether you like it or not."

Alex doesn't look even slightly disappointed. "That's cool," he says, smiling at Rian, smiling only for Rian, in a way that paralyzes Rian and renders him momentarily unable to respond. "It's kinda hot, in a subversive way. You know?"

Rian swallows. "Huh?"

"I mean, objectively being punk isn't hot compared to mainstream hot people, but there's something inherently hot about doing exactly what you're not supposed to. That's the whole point of punk." Rian's pretty sure punk has an additional, slightly larger point, but at the moment it's slipping his mind. "So like, this is hot in the sense that it's not what you'd expect to be hot. But I kind of make it work, don't you think?"

I think you kind of make this shower cap work, so I'm not exactly an unbiased authority on the matter, Rian keeps to himself. "Are you asking if I think you look hot with blue hair dye on your face?" he says, neutrally, trying not to give away that he does think Alex looks hot with blue hair dye on his face.

But Alex just meets Rian's gaze and says, "Yeah, that's exactly what I'm asking."

A moment passes. Rian realizes he never reclaimed his hand and it is now just kind of cradling Alex's neck where it meets his shoulder. Another moment. Alex keeps his eyes steady on Rian's. Neither of them move. Rian starts to feel his heartbeat and wonders how he never notices when he's not feeling it. It's only startling to feel it because it's so quiet usually. People should be able to feel their own heartbeats, all the time. Then it wouldn't be such an inconvenient surprise any time it kicks to life with a thudding intensity that almost makes Rian flinch.

It's not like he can lie. Morality aside, because Rian doesn't like to lie, he also knows Alex will see through him like glass.

Which leaves him with the truth as his only option, and unfortunately it's been too long since Alex asked for the truth to sound anything but incredibly guilty coming from Rian.

Well.

"If anyone is going to make it work," he says at last, "it's you."

Alex raises his eyebrows. "Way to not answer the question."

"I basically did."

"You completely didn't."

"Why do you care if I think it's hot? You don't need to impress me. I'm already in your shitty band."

"Maybe I'm trying to impress you for something that isn't the band," Alex says evenly, with an impressive degree of confidence, but Rian can feel his heart rate rise under his fingertips.

He has the presence of mind to think, what the fuck is going on? But instead of that, he says, "Like?"

Alex bites his lip. Rian thinks that if he's reading this right, it will flip everything upside down, but surely even he couldn't read a situation this wrong. There's nothing else Alex could possibly mean by this, right?

"I take it back," Rian says. "Dumb question."

"A little," Alex says, breathing a nervous laugh. There's a dangerously small amount of space between the two of them, the kind of small that Rian could bridge so easily, and with no reason not to, he figures there's not much more he can lose.

(He can't be misreading this. There's just no way. Alex isn't this cruel, and Rian isn't this stupid.)

Alex leans closer when Rian does, breath mingling in the air between them, so so so close, like insanely close, like Rian can practically taste it already, how impossible and incredible it's going to be to kiss Alex. The air catches in his throat, and he kind of smiles a little hesitantly, and Alex smells so much like hair dye that it is overpowering all of Rian's senses but he'd love to drown in that smell as long as it means drowning in Alex and their noses brush and Rian lets his eyes fall shut and then

The timer goes off, blaring an aggressive alarm throughout the bathroom, and Rian almost has a heart attack as he jerks backwards and he is going to fucking break his phone into many many pieces.

They're quiet as Rian rinses the dye out of Alex's hair. The worst part is Rian can't quite figure out what kind of silence this is, if it's awkward or anticipatory or what. But thinking for too long makes him want to scream or something, so he stops thinking and just focuses on washing out the dye. Alex is sitting in a chair they pulled in from the room, head tipped back under the sink, that same look on his face that —

But Rian's not thinking about it.

The water starts out bright blue, and Rian almost panics before Alex says lightly, "You just have to rinse until the water runs clear. Don't freak out if it's blue, that's normal."

So Rian does not freak out when the water is blue, and true to Alex's word, it starts to grow clearer the more Rian lets it run. If it were Alex in his position he would probably have a thousand poetic things to say — it's like life, he'd say in a tone just shy of pretentious, it starts out looking like it's going wrong but then everything literally becomes clear — but Rian isn't Alex and to him it's just a Good Sign that he hasn't Fucked Up.

Well he hasn't fucked up the hair, at least. Probably. Yet.

At long last, the water starts running clear, and Rian breathes a sigh of relief and turns the tap off. "You're good," he says, wringing the worst of water out of Alex's hair. His hands are stained blue, he now notices; probably he should have put the gloves back on when he'd gone to rinse Alex's hair, but he hadn't thought to.

"Yeah?" Alex asks, experimentally lifting his head and stretching his neck. "Ah, that is not the most comfortable position, not gonna lie."

Rian grabs the hand towel and dries his hands off, then gives it to Alex so Alex can dry his neck, which Alex does, and then leaves the towel around his shoulders. They are definitely going to get dye on this towel and the hotel will not be pleased, but as Alex stands up and begins rearranging his hair to look like himself again, the comment dies in Rian's throat.

Predictably, he looks really fucking good.

Rian watches Alex like some kind of lovestruck idiot until Alex turns to him, tilting his head, and says, "So? Final thoughts? How do I look?"

"Can I kiss you now?" Rian says, surprising himself. "That's what was about to happen before, right? Like, I'm not insane?"

"Your sanity has nothing to do with whether or not we were gonna kiss," Alex says, grinning, eyes bright, "but we totally were and now we definitely are."

This time Rian wastes no time, and his dye-stained fingers blend into the blue oasis of Alex's new hair color as their lips meet. Briefly, Rian's mind is once again crowded with dumb pointless questions, but he pulls Alex closer and Alex curls a hand into the front of Rian's shirt and Rian decides that his mind can take a hike.

As they break apart, Alex laughs. "So you think it looks good?"

"It looks terrible," Rian deadpans. "Yes, of course it looks good. You could shave your head and it would look good." Alex gasps. "Well. Okay. That was an exaggeration to make a point but I'm not sure it's actually true. But honestly, Alex." The jig is up, so Rian just smiles at him. "I always fucking think you look good. This?" He tugs at Alex's hair. "Hot. No doubt."

"Well, that's the only vote of confidence I need," Alex breathes, and then they're kissing again.

(The hair dye leaves its mark on the towel and Rian's hands and the pillowcases they sleep on that night, but its impact, in Rian's opinion, is altogether immeasurable. It's not every day a box of blue hair dye gets him a boyfriend.)

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themissinghippogriff · 4 years

Text

Operation to the Moony and Back

Word Count: 1.8k+

Rated: PG-13

Description: Reader is a rambuctious girl who falls for the soft and gentle Remus Lupin

WWW

Your eyes traveled from your paper to the person who sat in front of you. Remus Lupin was somewhat of a shy person, rarely speaking, rarely going out, and barely had any friends. He was well-liked all the same, this included you.

It was odd really. The saying 'Opposites attract' was correct in this situation, well on your side of things. Man of your friends urged you to hook up with Sirius though the idea was unappealing to you. You and Sirius would never be more than friends, the two of you were more like siblings really and acted pretty much the same.

Remus's gentle nature intrigued you, it was undeniably attractive.

You fiddled with your quill and smirked slightly. You looked and snapped at a dozing off Sirius who sat behind you with James, " Oi Snuffles," you whispered.

Sirius blinked, " What?" he yawned.

" Throw a party Friday night,"

Sirius nodded and began to doze back off, but shot back up, " Wait why?"

An almost sinister grin stretch across you (Y/S/T) face, " Don't worry about,"

The handsome boy grinned, " (Y/N), you sly dog!" he gushed, " Planning to corrupt my Remus are you?"

You rolled your eyes at Sirius's wiggling brows, " I swear to Merlin Sirius, if you get any louder I'll make James transform into a stage and ram his antlers up your ass," he snarled.

Sirius held his hands up in surrender and you turned around going back to taking notes.

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Sirius had managed to sneak a keg into the Gryffindor Common Room and enchant a Wizard Radio to tune into Muggle Radio Stations.

You wore a snug Led Zeppelin t-shirt you had gotten in fourth year, that hadn't been tight when you got it, and typical 70's jean shorts.

Sirius had dubbed your mission 'Operation Pounce the Wolf' and you had slapped him on the back of the head and argued ' Operation to the Moony and Back' was better.

You weren't sure what you were going to do. You had known Remus since you were 11 and had always had a soft spot for him, and even the smallest crush. He was handsome, kind, smart, and gentle. A part of you felt like he also had a small thing for you, as did James and Sirius. You were hoping to drag it out of him and even advance it into something more because now you were sure, you liked Remus Lupin.

You looked around the crimson room and observed. Remus wasn't there, but according to Sirius, he was going to be a little late due to prefect duty. You decided to join your friends over by the keg, nodding your head to Robert Plant as you walked over to them.

Marlene giggled as Dorcas whispered something in her ear and beamed when she saw you, " (Y/N)! Sirius told us about 'Operation Pounce the Wolf'!" she cheered.

You scowled searching the thrumming crowd for Sirius, " Oh that bloody idiot, it's called 'Operation to the Moony and back'," you sighed, " But who all knows besides you two?"

" Well just Lily and James, but that's a good thing!" she said quickly after seeing your look of distaste.

" Lily is going to be sure to get Remus back here when the party's in full swing, and by the way 'Operation to the Moony and Back' does sound better,"

Dorcas nodded her head in agreement before filling a cup with firewhiskey and handing it to you, " Thank you guys, that blundering idiot has no facility for language," you said eyeing Sirius before taking a swig of the strong beverage.

" Oi! Why are you looking at me like that for?!" he shouted back from across the room.

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" Alright Remus time for us to head back to the common room," Lily said with a smile, gesturing for her friend to follow her.

Remus returned the smile, " Eager to get back are you?"

She shrugged, " You have to admit, it's been a while since the boys threw a party," she sighed happily, " I need to have some fun or I might just go mad,"

The werewolf chuckled, " Unfortunately I can't relate, I think I might have a glass of butterbeer and head to bed,"

Lily's eyes widened and she turned around, masking her troubled face with a more soft expression, " Y'know (Y/N) will be there,"

Remus raised a blonde eyebrow, " Will she now?"

Lily grinned, " Mhm," she hummed, " I know you fancy her Remus,"

The man in question stopped in his tracks and blushed, " I wouldn't go as far as to say that, Lily,"

The red head's grinned became a smirk, " Then why are you blushing, Remus?"

He rolled his eyes and continued walking while Lily happily followed behind him. Crushes had always scared Remus, never wanting to get too close to someone for the fear of forming a romantic relationship and then having it all taken away when they found out what he was, the difference was (Y/N) already knew, and didn't look at him any different because of it.

She was smart, funny, stubborn, and bloody insane. Her rash actions exasperated him to the point he wanted to slam his head against a wall, but at the same time it's what made (Y/N) herself, and he wouldn't change her for the world.

They found their way back to the portrait, said the password and stepped inside. As soon as the portrait swung open they could hear whoops and the sound of Led Zeppelin's Black Dog being sung by two familiar voices.

Lily and Remus rounded the corner and was met with the sight of Sirius and (Y/N) standing on a table, arm's around each other's shoulder, and in the other a cup full of fire whiskey.

"Didn't take too long 'fore I found out

What people mean by down and out

Spent my money, took my car

Started tellin' her friends she gon' be a star!!"

They screamed off-key, laughing so hard they almost fell off the table.

Remus laughed at the scene but couldn't deny the insecurity of not being 'fun' enough for (Y/N). She would be happier with someone like Sirius, someone who was rambunctious, spontaneous, and had a free spirit like she did.

He sighed through his nose and made his way over to the table that held the butterbeer and began talking to James.

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" Oi, mate," whispered Sirius in her ear as they got off the table, " He's here,"

Your laughing ceased and you quickly looked around for the tall marauder. You spotted him by the butterbeer table talking to James. Remus turned around to grab another butterbeer and you saw James wink at you before shooting you a thumbs up.

You snorted, " You guys are taking this way too seriously,"

Sirius laughed, " You're just not taking it seriously enough, love,"

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Remus turned back around and noticed James had left, not knowing the messy-haired boy had rolled under the table and was waiting for (Y/N) to come swooping in.

His light green eyes looked around the room and spotted (Y/N) waving at him, he waved back, his heart nearly skipping a beat when she came walking towards him.

She never wore makeup or did her hair any kind of particular way. The most makeup he had ever seen her wear was mascara and eyeliner. He found her immensely attractive and how natural she was, physically and emotionally.

" Hey, Remus," she said with a bright smile, " Are you not going to dance?"

Remus scoffed at the idea, " I rather not have people thinking I have a stick up my ass, I'll just be a wallflower for tonight"

She laughed, " Well I suppose I'll have to join you,"

" You really don't have to do that,"

She shook her head, her (Y/E/C) eyes twinkling, " I know, but I want to, c'mon," she gestured for him to follow her and the two went across the room to the small balcony that was connected to Gryffindor Tower.

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They closed the doors and the rock music became muffled and the warm yellow light from inside faded, and was replaced with the blue glow of the crescent moon. The two leaned against the railing and began to chat.

" Remus I need to ask for some advice," you said.

Remus took a sip of butterbeer, " Yes, (Y/N)?"

" You see I like this guy,"

Remus's stomach dropped and he lowered his head, " Oh... um please continue, " he said kindly with a strained smile.

" I don't really know how to tell him, what should I do?"

Remus placed a hand on the back of his neck, I think you should be straight forward, get him alone and tell him how you feel,"

You smiled and watched him sit down on an iron outdoor chair, evening out the height difference between the two of you more so.

" Well," you said stepping toward him looking down at him slightly, " I like you, Remus,"

Remus's mouth opened slightly, " Y-you like me?" he choked out, genuinely shocked.

You nodded, " Will you out on a date with me next weekend?"

Remus's eyes widened at your forwardness, " I-I don't really know what to say,"

You frowned and took a step back, " Do you not feel the same?"

His green eyes widened, " No!" he shouted reaching out and grabbing your hand, " No, I mean not no! But no as in no that's untrue because I do feel the same I'm just shocked you-"

You cut off his rambling with a soft kiss, your other hand coming up to cup his rough jaw. Remus's large hand placed it's self on the small of your back while Remus deepened the kiss.

You pulled back slightly and smiled, " Well that was great," you sighed.

Remus struggled to hold back a smile as he cupped your cheek and stroked it with his thumb, " You're probably the most beautiful person I've ever seen," he hummed.

Your stomachs did flips and you felt your face heat up, hating and loving the effect his words had on you. When guys would hit on you, you were always cool and collected, saying something witty or flirting back but you found yourself at a loss for words.

You leaned back in and caught his lips in a deep kiss, allowing yourself to melt into his embrace. Your hands ran through his sand locks and his grip around your waist tightened, his calloused thumbs playing with the hem of your shirt.

You smiled into the kiss and came back up for air, " Operation To the Moony and Back," you said thoughtfully, " Was successful,"

" Wait, what?"

#young remus lupin #remus lupin #remus x reader #remus lupin x reader

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