#was afraid she wouldn't come back because she is a stray | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

sleepdeprivedandinsane · 1 year

Text

Love You Like I'm Never Gonna Love You Again

Evan 'Buck' Buckley x Fem!Reader

angst with a happy ending

summary: Reader gets shot on a job. When she flatlines on the way to the hospital, Buck is worried she won't make it out alive.

POTENTIAL TW : : mentions of gsw, blood, grief, guns? I think? If there's any I missed or should add lmk! Enjoy 🫡

I only have one thing to say for this... sorry 🥲

It was times like this that Buck wondered why he did what he did. Everyone was silent as they sat at the dinner table. No one bothered to try and say anything, and no one looked up either. They all focused on their polished black shoes, not having the stomach to look up and see her empty chair.

He hears people say, "it all happened so fast," but when the shot rang out and he watched the blood spread on her shirt, everything was in slow motion. The shot echoed in his ears. He was too shocked to scream as her body fell slowly to the ground. Realization hit when he felt her blood on his face, and everyone rushed to her aid. It was like someone shocked him, like he jolted awake from a nightmare. Only, when he woke up, she wasn't better.

"No..." He said. "No, no, no!" He screamed, rushing to her.

Bobby and Eddie held him back as he fought to get to her, Hen and Chim working with shaky hands.

"This can't be happening..." He whimpered.

She looked at him, a weak smile on her bloody face, blood pouring from her wound."It's okay. It'll be okay." She muttered fraily.

She nodded, as if trying to convince herself as well.

"Please- let me go!" He yelled desperately, "please! I need to go to her!" His eyes watered as he begged Bobby and Eddie to let him go.

They, too, were on the verge of tears, trying to hold them back for his sake. It wouldn't have made much of a difference, though. All his focus was on her.

Once they got her loaded into the ambulance, they let him go. He ran to her side and sat down. He took her hand, brushing the stray hairs that fell from her braid away from her eyes. She looked up at him with watery eyes, swallowing thickly because she knew it wasn't good. A bullet wound is supposed to hurt. It isn't good when it doesn't.

"Try not to move, okay?" He said shakily.

She nodded, squeezing his hand to assure him. She felt somewhat guilty that she was even trying when she knew she probably wouldn't make it to the hospital. She couldn't bring herself to lie to him. She couldn't find the words to tell him how much she loved him either.

"You're gonna be okay. You have to be." He said firmly, denial dripping from his tongue.

She shook her head. "No." She whimpered. "I'm not."

He shook his head defiantly. "Don't say that. Say anything but that." He said, his voice cracking.

Hen and Chim had to choke back the words 'she's right' because they themselves didn't want to believe she wasn't going to be okay. They wanted to believe she'd be okay like Buck did.

"Okay." She said. "Then I need to tell you something. Before I don't get the chance. I-" She started.

But he cut her off with a shake of his head. "No, you can tell me when you're better." He said.

They all knew what she was going to say, but no one said anything. Everyone, including each other, knew about their feelings for each other. Y/n was afraid of it all going sour, however, and she didn't have the courage to take the plunge and risk losing her best friend. Evan, he wanted to save them both the heartache in case it didn't last. Mostly himself, if he was honest. He knew they'd come back from it, but it'd never be the same. They didn't want to take that chance, and everyone thought it was stupid. Anyone with eyes could see they were crazy for each other. Absolutely head over heels.

"You can't leave me. Please don't leave me." He said desperately, tears streaming down his blood stained cheeks.

She reached up and wiped away his tears, her hand lingering when he leaned into her. "You'll be okay." She said sadly.

"No." He croaked. "I won't." He shook his head, placing his hand on hers.

"You'll have Maddie, Bobby, Chimney, Hen, Eddie, and Christopher. You'll be okay." She tried to convince him.

"But I won't have you." He whispered. "You can't give up yet. You have to fight." He said defeated.

"I'm so tired." She said weakly. "I'm sorry." She said, struggling to get the words out.

"I know it hurts-" He said, but she cut him off.

"It doesn't. It doesn't hurt." She whispered.

"Please, it's not supposed to end this way, I still need you. We still need you." He said.

She smiled weakly, wiping his tears once more. She gasped, her chest heaving, before she stilled, her eyes going blank. For a moment, her hand remained against his cheek, but he knew she was gone. Her smile faded, her mouth agape as blood spilled from the corners. Her hand fell, and Buck never knew silence could be so loud. The constant beep, the solid line, seemed to taunt them. Hen angrily shut it off. Chimney slowly took his hands from her wound where he attempted to stop the bleeding.

"No." Buck said, getting up and starting cpr.

He wasn't ready to give up on her. Henrietta shut her eyes tightly, fighting back tears of her own. Chimney shook his head, determined to see her smile again. To see them finally happy together. To see her in a white gown as he watched his best friends say their vows. To see little baby Buckleys running around with Jee-yun. He reached into her wound, closing off the source of the bleed. Hen sniffled as she turned the machine back on, the consistent beep sounding again. What was a taunt became motivation to them, and Buck continued to try recesutate her.

"C'mon..." He said. "C'mon!" He yelled desperately.

Tears mixed with the dried blood on his face, but he hardly noticed either. Hen tried not to look because seeing one of her best friends lay lifeless on the gurney, while another desperately tried to bring her back, would be too much. She knew that would break her. Break her faith in the job. She needed to try to remember why she did it instead of seeing a reason not to.

As Chimney ran beside the gurney, Hen filled in the doctors and nurses, but Buck didn't hear. He just heard a ringing in his ears, the gun shot echoing in his head. Her lifeless eyes stared back at him, the blood still spilling from her mouth. It gave him a little hope, though, because if she was totally gone she wouldn't be bleeding... right?

"Sir, we can take it from here." A nurse said, easing Buck from his position above her as he tried to get her heart beating again.

Chim was eased into paper blue covers as they rolled them into surgery.

They hadn't been ushered away yet. They could see nurses starting chest compressions and giving her O2. They could see the doctors gently ease Chim's hand from her wound. They could see the blood pour from the wound as a result. As the minutes droned on and her heart didn't start, he felt his own shatter.

It wasn't quick. It was slow. Painful.

Hen could see her blood spilling onto the floor. Her hope quickly diminished seeing the amount.

Finally, Buck could see her heart re-start and her chest rise, and he released a breath he wasn't aware he was holding.

Then, Buck finally broke down. He fell to his knees, sobbing. Hen knelt down with him, pulling him into her embrace, but it offered neither of them comfort. Bobby, Eddie, and Athena rushed to them.

Athena's face fell. "She flat lined. Didn't she?" She said sadly, defeated.

Hen nodded weakly. Eddie dropped to his knees, hugging Buck as well.

"I'm gonna get this son of a bitch." Athena growled, storming out of the trauma bay. "Call me when she's out of surgery." She said as she determinedly walked away.

Bobby hung his head, unwillingly letting the tears fall. None of them could bring themselves to leave. None of them wanted to.

It wasn't until Chim finally returned, covered in blood, and said they wouldn't know anything for several more hours.

It took some convincing, but they finally got Buck to leave to finish his shift. But none of them truly left the ER.

Buck had an empty plate in front of him, but he couldn't bring himself to eat. Not when he saw her blank expression every time he closed his eyes.

Their families all came out to support them, the community coming together to put out candles and figures of good luck and healing, hoping and praying for the firefighter and her family and team. Praying for good news. The sight was bittersweet.

Buck couldn't stand the silence. He stood abruptly and left, heading to the locker rooms.

He had to choke back a sob. He didn't want to live without her. He didn't want to love anyone else but her. He didn't want to do this job if she wasn't beside him.

"Evan, you were made to save a life."

His mother's voice rang out in his head.

He wanted to scream. He wanted to sob. He wanted her back.

He missed her smile, he missed her laugh, he missed the stupid jokes she'd tell to cheer everyone up on a hard day. He missed her warm hugs and how she smelled like roses and lillies: her favorite perfume. Her hair always smelled fruity, and her skin was always so soft. He missed her giggles and the way she'd gently caress his face. He wanted her back.

He wanted to hear from the damn hospital. Wanted to hear them say she made it through. It was nearing six hours after the shooting, and it felt like the longest six hours of his life.

He stood in the locker room, leaning against the metal doors of the lockers, his head down. He squeezed his eyes shut, desperately trying to think of her in any way that wasn't the lifeless look in her eyes. Even if she made it, that sight would haunt his nightmares. He mentally kicked himself for not telling her he loved her sooner. He knew she knew. Hell, everyone else did too. But he needed to know she heard it. And right now, he was praying for any miracle. He was praying that he'd get the chance to tell her, kiss her, hold her, anything.

He screamed and stood, hitting the lockers to try to ease the pain in any way. He punched and punched, angry and distraught and so many other things. He wanted order. He needed something to ground him. Right now, that was the stinging pain in his knuckles. He punched the doors again and again until his fist was as numb as he was inside. He fell to his knees, crying weakly.

Maddie came in, silently sitting next to him on the floor. She didn't try reassuring him that she'd be okay because truth be told, she was terrified too. She also knew nothing she said would help ease his pain. So she simply laid a gentle hand on his cheek, turning his face to her. She smiled softly, pulling his head forward and placing a gentle kiss to his forehead. He leaned on her, laying his head on her shoulder as he sobbed tiredly.

"I just need to know that she's okay." He croaked weakly. "I just need her to be okay." He sobbed.

"Shh," she cooed softly, "I know." She whispered. She held his shoulders, letting her own tears fall.

"I'm not going to lie to you and say it'll be okay. I don't know if she's going to make it, and I won't try to pretend that I do. But I know one thing: she is incredibly strong." She said, pulling him away just enough to look him in the eye.

"She's got a lot of fire left in her, still got a lot of fight left. She doesn't give up easily, and I refuse to believe that this time is going to be any different. She's too stubborn and bull headed to let someone else decide when it's her time to leave. And I have that to hold onto." She said.

He smiled faintly. "Thank you." He whispered. "That helps." He said, nodding as he closed his eyes.

"You need to go home and rest." She said concerned.

He shook his head. "I can't sleep without knowing she's okay." He said defiantly.

Just then, Chimney ran in, Jee on his hip. "It's the hospital." He panted. "They've got news on Y/n." He said.

Maddie and Buck shot up from the floor, running out to the main floor where Bobby was on the phone with the doctor.

"Here they are, I'm putting you on speaker." He said when Maddie and Buck approached.

"I'm relieved to call with good news. Ms Y/l/n made it." He said relieved.

A collection of cheers sounded throughout the firehouse. And for the first time since she was shot, Buck felt all the tension leave his body. "Thank god." He muttered to himself.

"She suffered slight head trauma when she fell, and with the pain medication she's on, she'll probably be out for a while." He said.

"When can we see her?" Hen asked antsy.

"You can come down now if you'd like. Visiting hours are over, but I'll make an exception this time." He said.

"Thank you. Thank you so much." Bobby said.

Before he even ended the call, Buck was running to his jeep. He sped to the hospital, probably breaking several traffic laws on the way, but at the moment, he could care less. All he could think was, 'She's alive. She's really alive. She's okay.' In that moment, nothing else mattered to him. She was alive. That's all that he cared about.

He ran up to the receptionist, and as soon as he had her room number, he was running up the stairs.

The elevator might've been quicker, but the burn in his legs and the sharp jab in his gut as he took the stairs two at a time reminded him that he was awake, that it was real. She was really okay.

He saw her through the large window in the wall, the door slightly ajar. All the air left his lungs. He couldn't describe the immense relief any other way.

He rushed to her side, dropping into the chair beside her bed. The back of her gown was open, the bandages peeking through. Before he even registered it, he was tucking the blanket over her exposed skin. He took her hand in his, feeling her warm skin against his. He sighed, leaning his forehead against their intertwined hands. Up until now, he hadn't realized just how tired he was. His face was probably all red and puffy from crying, but he didn't care all that much anymore. He'd hang the moon if it meant she would be okay. He'd hold the sky up for her if it meant he would see her smile again. He didn't care. All that mattered to him was that she was safe.

She groaned, squeezing his hand in hers. "Hey, Buckley." She croaked out with a dry throat.

He smiled, remembering when she would call him that when they first got to know each other. At first, it was because she was bad at remembering names and relied on the name tags. Then, it became a way for her to tease him because she knew he didn't like it. He would always respond with her last name, too, but it was only her and a few other people who were allowed to call him that. The few other people being Hen, Chim, Bobby, and Eddie. And of course, his sister, but she only really did when he was about to be reprimanded for something. Other than that, no one else was allowed to use his full name. She was even allowed to call him Evan, but she only used it when it was just them.

"Hey, Y/l/n." He responded softly. He gently handed her the cup of ice water from the table beside her bed, helping her sit up slightly so she could take a drink. She nodded when she was finished and he set it down.

She smiled at him fondly. "You were right." She said. "Maybe I was being a little dramatic." She joked lightheartedly.

Maybe he wasn't in the mood, but that struck a cord with him. "You weren't being dramatic, Y/n, you flatlined. You almost died." He said seriously.

Her eyes widened and she sat forward slightly. "I- what?" She asked shocked.

His eyes began to water, and his had shook slightly. "You were dead. I thought you were gone. I was so scared." He whispered meekly.

She frowned, pulling his face to hers. She rested her forehead against his, gently wiping his tears away. "Hey, I'm right here, okay? I'm not going anywhere anytime soon." She whispered.

"You almost died. I didn't know what I was going to do if you didn't make it. I wasn't sure I could live with myself." He said softly. "I need you here. I've never loved anyone the way I love you." He admitted. He wasn't too particularly happy with the time and place, but he couldn't wait any longer. He needed to know he told her. He needed to know he said it.

She kissed him deeply, putting everything she was trying to tell him in it. That she was real, and she was alive. She wasn't going anywhere. That she loved him too.

"I love you. God, I've wanted to tell you for so long but I was too scared." He said.

"What made you not be scared anymore?" She asked.

"Oh, I'm still scared. I'm scared if we go all in and it ends badly, that I'll lose my best friend and the best thing that's ever happened to me. But seeing you lay lifeless on the gurney scared me way more. I'm still scared, but not as scared as I was when I thought you died." He said.

Her face fell. "Oh, God, you saw me flatline?" She said, a mix of emotions crossing her face. He just nodded sadly.

"I saw through the window. There was so much blood. It's something that's going to haunt my nightmares for the foreseeable future." He said.

She stroked his cheek gently. "You said I could say it when I was better. Can I say it now?" She asked.

He closed his eyes and nodded. "Please."

"I love you, Evan Buckley." She said smiling.

He smiled relieved. She leaned her forehead against his again. "I love you so much." She whispered. "I love you, I love you, I love you." She said, peppering his face with kisses until he finally smiled. "There it is." She said softly.

"I'm never letting you go again." He said, gently pulling her into his chest to hug her, just wanted to hold her for a little while.

"Well, that's good, 'cus I'm never leaving your side." She said, sinking into his embrace.

Eventually, after a grueling 30 minutes of being stuck in traffic due to a pileup, the team finally made it to the hospital, only to find Y/n and Buck asleep.

Y/n lay back, the bed sitting up slightly, but not much. Buck lay right next to her chest, her arm over his shoulders, and their fingers entwined. It looked like they fell asleep talking and watching 'Gone With The Wind' on some channel. They all smiled at the sight, happy to see the two finally relaxed.

Each one took a seat somewhere and eventually fell asleep themselves. They weren't about to leave without giving Y/n a hug and reminding her how much they love her. Besides, they were all exhausted. Physically, emotionally, and mentally. The hospital wasn't the best place to sleep, but they weren't about to leave their youngest member alone in a hospital room, let alone let Buck be there by himself. And maybe it was to make themselves feel better because they were all worried sick about her. Or maybe it was for her and Buck. All they knew: they weren't leaving her alone again.

#angst prompt #writers on tumblr #911 on fox #911 one shot #evan 'buck' buckley #buck x reader #evan buckley x reader #this is some angst angst

2K notes · View notes

skzhocomments · 3 months

Text

Clingy - Bang Chan Oneshot Fanfic

General Masterlist

Pairing: Bang Chan (Stray Kids) x OC (name: Aera. Story is written in 2nd person)

Genre: angst, fluff

Word Count: ~3.3k

Warnings: a little angst, crying

This is just a story that doesn’t describe Bang Chan or other mentioned Stray Kids’ members true characters in any way. It’s just a product of my imagination and should be treated as such.

This story is also on Wattpad (click here) and AO3 (click here)

---

Summary

You overhear Chan and Jisung talking about how clingy you are, and it really hurts your feelings.

A/N: As any other writer out there, I would appreciate reblogs and your comments on this story. Please let me know if you enjoyed it, and most importantly, have fun!

---

Clingy

"Is Aera coming over today?"

"Probably."

"Tsk. She's always here. Don't you find it annoying?"

You were just outside the door when this conversation between Chris and Jisung stopped you dead in your tracks.

You've been dating Chris for just shy of a year now, and you figured out early in the relationship that he never has free time. He's a workaholic through and through, starting his days with early practice and finishing them with late nights in the studio. Thus, you came up with a solution: whenever you wouldn't be working night shifts, you would come visit him in the studio and keep him company.

You never interrupted or bothered him. You just watched him work, stealing occasional kisses when he'd take short breaks, taking care of him, bringing him food (as he more often than not forgot to eat balanced meals completely), giving him water when his bottle would run out, and massaging his shoulders when he'd feel particularly stiff.

You never considered yourself to be annoying, until now. And although you shouldn't listen to other people's conversations, you just had to know what your boyfriend thought about it.

"Annoying? How so?" Chris asked.

"I mean, she's being so clingy. She always wants to see you or be around you and she's coming by, like, every day. It seems exhausting."

"Oh... Yeah, I see what you mean. Well..."

"What?" Jisung chuckles.

"She is a bit clingy, yeah."

"It annoys me sometimes. I miss our bonding time in the studio." Jisung chuckles again.

"Yeah, it would be nice to sometimes have time to ourselves. Sure." Chan chuckles as well, and you start feeling your heart break into a million pieces with every word you hear.

"Oh, so you also find her a bit... of a nuisance?"

"I wouldn't say that... But she does suffocate me sometimes, I won't lie."

You truly didn't know that Chris viewed you as suffocating. He's never told you.

If he had, you would've never started to come to the studio.

Why did he even give you an access key?

Already on the verge of tears, you decide to turn around and give Chris what he obviously wants: time away from you. Just as you do, you see Changbin walking towards the studio.

"Aera!" He exclaims and runs to you happily, taking you in his arms and spinning you around. You've become close friends ever since you started dating Chan, and this was how he always said hi to you.

"Binnie!" You ruffle his hair and smile back.

"Did you come visit? Let's go." He grabs your hand, and before being able to protest, he opens the door and drags you inside.

You try to keep on smiling as you say hi to your boyfriend and Jisung, but now that you're aware of their true feelings towards you being here, you can't help but notice every small detail. Chris and Jisung give each other a knowing look, and you notice it. You just know it's because you are there again.

You wonder if Changbin feels the same way, if he also finds you annoying and suffocating.

Your chest is tight, and it's getting hard to pretend that everything is okay. It's difficult to breathe. You can't even bring yourself to speak much, afraid that Chris will find you smothering, so your words get stuck in your throat, choking you.

You don't even laugh much at their jokes, and you wonder how everything can change in just a span of 10 minutes. The studio used to be a safe space for you, where you could relax and be yourself, but it now feels like a cage.

It seemed like you could now notice all sorts of things you weren't able to notice before. Although Chan is his usual self, it somehow feels different to you.

He doesn't want to spend time with me; runs through your head repeatedly, and with every passing minute, it's getting harder and harder to stay there.

You want to leave.

No, you need to leave.

Your eyes are watering up and the pressure in your chest is crushing you; the throbbing pain in your heart is getting too much; your eyes start to water again; and you need, you need to find an excuse and run away from this place.

You have to come up with something - anything convincing enough so that Chris won't bat an eye. Something that wouldn't be too obvious a lie.

"Oh, shit!" You exclaim, and the three men in the room look at you with questioning eyes.

"What's wrong?" Chris asks.

"I just remembered! Fuck! I promised Jia I'm taking over her shift tonight! Shit! I have to go!" You jolt up from the sofa and grab your bag hastily.

I have to get out.

"Oh, no! Want me to drive you?" Chris asks as he stands up as well.

"No, don't worry. I know you have work to do." You smile briefly, then wave to Jisung and Changbin and begin to turn around.

"You sure?" Chan grabs your hand, making you look at him.

"Yeah. If I leave now, I'll make it just in time."

"Ok, babe. See you tomorrow?"

"Sure." You smile as he presses his lips against yours briefly, before you part from him.

"Text me when you get there, so I know you're safe."

"Will do, bye bye!" You turn around and leave the room with haste, and once you're finally alone in the elevator, with the doors closed and already moving towards the ground floor, you break down.

It's hard to stop the tears from flowing, the overwhelming sadness completely taking over you, and you feel every piece of you ache. It shouldn't hurt this much. He didn't say he didn't love you. He simply said you're suffocating.

It's not that bad.

Is it?

You realise that Chris is right; you are smothering. You've always been the clingier one in the relationship, and maybe it's time to take a step back and stop being so keen on spending time with your boyfriend.

Maybe you should simply let him initiate whatever outings he wants, whenever he has time, and you'll see to your hobbies and occupy your mind with something else but him.

You get home and join a class right away. You don't even notice what you've clicked on.

Pottery, apparently.

Whatever.

This will do.

"She still hasn't texted me."

"Hm? What did you say, Hyung?" Han raises his head from his notebook. They've been working on a new song for a few hours now, and whenever Jisung writes lyrics, he gets completely absorbed in them, not noticing anything else.

"I said, she still hasn't texted me. How many hours has it been since she left for her shift?" Chan asks uneasily. You've always texted him to let him know you're safe, so this felt completely out of character for you.

"Maybe she just forgot." Jisung shrugs.

"Have you tried calling her?" Changbin asks.

"Yeah, I did... she won't pick up either."

As he answers this, Chan's breath hitches in his throat. What if something happened? What if you've had an accident, or fell and hit your head, or- it was already pretty dark out when you left.

Why the fuck did he let you go alone? He should've taken you to the restaurant himself.

Fuck, why are you still working there anyway? He's told you time and time again that he can take care of you while you search for a job in your field. He knows how hard you've worked for your diploma and how disappointed you've been after searching for months on end with no results.

Why didn't you want to take him up on the offer? That would mean all the free time in the world, and more importantly, no night shifts.

"I'm sure she's fine, Hyung." Changbin puts a comforting hand on Chan's shoulder, pulling him out of his thoughts. "But if you're that worried, you could go to the restaurant. It's not far from here anyway."

"Is that okay?" He asks anxiously.

"Yeah. We can manage just fine for a couple hours, don't worry."

With a short nod, Chan stands up and grabs his coat.

"You're just as clingy as her." Jisung chuckles slightly. "Message us when you're there."

"Will do!"

Chris runs hastily to the elevator and clicks on the button for the underground parking lot, then hurries to his car. The ride to the restaurant is less than 10 minutes long, and he curses once more for not taking you himself.

He couldn't even spare 10 minutes for you.

Fuck.

He's definitely never felt shittier...

... until he reaches the restaurant, goes inside, and sees that you're nowhere in sight.

"Chris? Oh, hi! I almost didn't recognise you with your cap on. What are you doing here?" A girl approaches him with a large smile.

"Jia? I thought you weren't working tonight?" He stares at the girl in front of him in confusion.

"Yeah, I am." The girl replies, just as confused.

"Oh... is Aera here?"

"No, she's working day shifts this month. Hasn't she told you?"

"She did, I just thought... whatever, nevermind." Chan waves his hand and smiles. "Thanks."

"You didn't have a fight, did you?" Jia asks with a worried expression on her face.

Chan didn't know. Did you?

"... no, we didn't. Thank you, Jia. Have a nice shift!" He waves and leaves the restaurant, and as soon as he's back in the car, he takes his phone out to call you again, when he notices a text.

Sorry Channie, it's been chaotic at work, and I couldn't check my phone until now. I forgot to text you to let you know all's okay. I got there safe <3

He freezes.

You lied. You've never lied to him before.

Why?

He decides not to call your bluff and plays along. You surely have a reason to lie to him, and he wants you to come forward yourself instead of having to confront you.

You're safe. That's all that matters.

Or that's what he's trying to tell himself, although doubts start running rampant in his mind. Your behaviour today has been weird, ever since you came to the studio. You avoided eye contact, you invented an excuse to leave after not even 20 minutes, you lied that you're going to the restaurant, and you haven't even messaged him to let him know you've gotten there, or home, or wherever the heck you've gone, safely.

With a sigh, he starts the engine and drives back to the studio.

"Babe, can you give me some water, please?" Chan asks in a quiet voice as he's trying to perfect a beat he's been working on. It's 2AM already, and he's growing tired.

When you don't answer, he asks something again, this time in a whisper.

"Did you fall asleep?"

There's still no answer coming from you, so he turns his chair around to see you, and then the realisation hits him.

You're not there.

In fact, he can't even remember the last time you've come to the studio to keep him company.

He noticed that ever since that night you lied to him, you've been acting strange. You no longer text him unless he texts you first; you don't initiate any dates or activities with him; and most importantly, you're never there.

He misses you.

Did you fall out of love? Are you trying to let him down slowly by spending less and less time with him?

Shit, he never expected love to hurt as much as it does. Your absence hurts.

He grabs his phone to text you, hoping that you're not asleep. It takes you 12 minutes to reply. 12 minutes that passed by agonisingly slowly, but he's at least grateful you actually replied. Waiting until morning would've been torture.

As soon as he sees your text, he calls you.

"Yeah?" You reply, your voice small. You always sound like this when you've just woken up.

Fuck, when was the last time Chan woke up next to you?

"Sorry, babe, did I wake you up?"

"Mhm. What's wrong?"

"I just- can I come over?"

"Now?" You reply, still sounding asleep.

"Yeah. I really want to see you."

"You have a key though..." You yawn. "... why ask me?"

"... I know. I'll be there in 10 minutes, okay?"

"Mkay."

Chan makes his way to the parking lot and checks his wallet, phone, and the keys to your place a hundred times. When he's sure he has everything, he starts driving. He usually loves late–night drives, but his heart is now ridden with anxiety, which makes it completely unpleasant .

In front of your door, he contemplates once more using your key. He used to use it and come over all the time, but he's been so stumped with work as of late that he can't even remember when the last time he's been here was.

The apartment is quiet and dark, so he does his best to not disturb the peace as he walks hesitantly through the hallway until the bedroom.

The lights are turned off in the bedroom as well, and you're now fast asleep again. Still, he comes behind you and spoons you; he lets his face come close to your head and takes in your familiar scent as he hugs you.

"You're home?" You ask quietly.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you."

"It's fine." You yawn again.

"I missed you so much." He whispers, and you hum.

"Mhm. I missed you too."

"Do you... still love me?"

"What?" You ask, your voice audibly more awake now. "Of course I still love you, Channie. What kind of question is that?"

"You've been so... distant lately. You don't even come over anymore."

"Look who's talking." You chuckle slightly. "When's the last time you've been here?"

"... you're right. But..."

"I'm sorry." You whisper, feeling yourself on the verge of crying again. "I do still love you, but... I was suffocating you. Maybe it's better that we spend less time together now."

"What?" Chan sits up on the bed, leaving you feeling empty and your back cold. You sit up as well and turn on your lamp, and looking at his face breaks your heart. His eyes are glistening with tears, matching yours like a mirror.

"You... you said you feel suffocated by me... I know I'm too clingy, so..."

"Wait! No... When- when did I say that to you?" He frowns. "Maybe I've just-"

"To me?" You smile bitterly, cutting him off. "Never. But you told Jisung how suffocating I am and how you sometimes just want time on your own, so... I'm giving you that."

As soon as he hears your words, he remembers. He had one conversation about this with Jisung, which he realised was bullshit anyway when he noticed how much he thinks about you and how lonely he feels when you're not there.

"Baby, I-"

"Don't even bother denying it, Chris. I heard it."

You look away as you feel like starting to cry again, and tears start falling immediately after. Fuck, it's pathetic, really.

"Aera, look at me, please. I didn't mean to deny it..." He pleads with you, but it's hard to listen to him and raise your head. It's so damn hard to see him.

When Chris sees you won't budge, he doesn't know what to do. You're crying and shaking, and it's all because of him. He's hurt you.

He thinks about how he could make it better and decides to hug you tightly.

"Baby, look... I did say that, and I'm truly sorry. I was so, so wrong. Yes, you are clingy, but fuck, I don't want it any other way. I've missed you so much these past weeks."

You stand silent and just listen to him.

"I kept turning my chair around to look at you and you were never there. I kept checking my phone but there were no messages from you. I didn't even know if I could still use the key you gave me, or if you're not comfortable with that anymore..."

"Channie, how can you even think that?" You cry out, and he hugs you tighter. "This is your home too."

"I'm truly sorry... I've been up in my ass with work and neglected you completely, and only realised how much I need you by my side when you were gone..."

"Yeah." You whisper.

"Are we going to be fine...?"

"... Yeah, we are. Just... please tell me if it gets too much, mhm?"

"It won't." He kisses your forehead as he smiles slightly. "Thank you for forgiving me. But Aera, you know? You also lied to me." He chuckles. "You didn't have any shifts that night."

"I'm sorry... I was hurt, and- wait, how do you know that?"

"I went to the restaurant to check on you, and Jia was really confused to see me there." He lets go of you and grabs your face with his hands, running his thumb over your cheeks and wiping away all the tears.

"I just... felt so horrible. Hearing you say that I'm suffocating you was like a punch in the gut. I'm so sorry I was too clingy."

He shakes his head and presses his lips against yours.

"Please be clingy from now on. I thought it felt suffocating, but I actually got so used to the warmth of your attention, that being without it felt utterly depressing. So, please, keep clinging to me."

"... okay." You nod.

"And please come by and spend time with me in the studio again, hm? What about tomorrow evening? We can have dinner together, and then you can come hang out with me. If you want to, of course."

"Oh, actually-" She chuckles slightly, "I can't have dinner with you tomorrow, sorry. I can come after 9 to the studio, though."

"Why?" He tilts his head.

"Well, you see...?" You rub your nape, "I have a pottery class from 7:30."

"Pottery?" Chan laughs in disbelief. "When did that happen?"

"When I decided to fill my days with something else to keep me from thinking about you all the time." You smile sadly, and he pouts.

"But I want you to think about me all the time. I also think about you all the time."

"The pottery class will last for a few more weeks, so you'll have to make do." You poke his nose playfully, and he is quick to scrunch it.

"You're punishing me." He kisses you again. "Do you like making pottery?"

"Honestly? I'm shit at it." You say, and both of you burst out laughing.

"I didn't ask you if you're a pro or not. Only if you enjoy it."

"Mhm... I think I do." You smile.

"That's amazing. Show me what you've worked on."

You excitedly grab your phone and show him all the photos and videos you've taken in the past few weeks, explaining the techniques you've learned and how much you've been struggling to keep up with the class, and Chris listens attentively.

By the time you're done talking, it's almost 5 AM, and both of you are barely able to keep your eyes open.

"So, now that we're okay, should we head to sleep?" You ask, and Chris caresses your arm gently.

"Yeah. Let's sleep. Good night, my love."

"Good night."

He kisses the back of your head, and you both fall into a deep, restful slumber.

~The End~

280 notes · View notes

heli-writes · 2 months

Text

A dragon's heart, part 8.

Pairing: Barbarian!Bakugou Katsuki x female!reader

Summary: The dragonblood tribe is known for being cruel, barbarian warriors that slaughter, loot and rape all places they pass through. They are feared among the villagers and even bigger cities. Having lost most of their women to a plague, they're trying to ensure their tribe's survival by kidnapping women from other places. However, they're not the only monsters in human form out there. When y/n experiences this first hand, she has no choice but to ask for help from no other but the barbarian leader Katsuki Bakugou himself.

Disclaimer: injuries, sexism, mentions of male genitalia, orgasms and (oral) sex

[Please don't read if you are sensible to or triggered by the topics mentioned above.]

Minors do not interact.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9

Series Masterlist

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Katsuki fastens the stag at the dragon's back behind the saddle. Y/n stands beside him and secures the stag while Katsuki uses the straps to make sure that the stag doesn't fall off during the flight. She watches as Katsuki works with a grim expression on his face. More grim than usual, she thinks. She wonders why. She doesn't know that Katsuki takes her to his tribe today. He didn't even try to tell her since she wouldn't understand him anyway.

He would never admit it but he's anxious. He knows that his men will celebrate his victory. Coming home with a successful hunt. Bringing home a woman for the tribe.

Concerning the old hag, he's not so sure. His mother is one of the few remaining women in his tribe. The plague took most of the fertile women. Meaning old women past their fertile prime and young girls before their first blood survived. Leaving a whole generation of young men behind.

His mother always had very specific expectations of how Katsuki's life was supposed to take place. Becoming the tribe's leader, for example. That being said, he's not sure she will approve of him bringing home a stray female. Well, that'd be alright if he did and brought her for his men. Or for himself for a night. But definitely not as a potential mate for himself.

Suddenly, there's a warm hand on his bicep. Y/n. She must've said something to him considering how expectantly she looks at him. „What, woman?“, he spats. Y/n furrows her brow in worry. Clearly, something is upsetting Katsuki.

Y/n walks closer to him and wraps her arms around his middle and leans into him. For a second, Katsuki wants to push her away because he is annoyed. When he sees how she looks at him, he changes his mind. Soft eyes look up at him, making him dizzy.

He shifts so he can take her into his arms. He leans his forehead onto hers and takes a deep breath. He can still feel the angry feeling in his stomach. Or is it anxiety? He doesn't know. Either way, it feels like a stone lying right behind his belly button.

Y/n moves her head and meets Katsuki in a kiss. Without opening his eyes, Katsuki kisses her back. In contrast to yesterday at the bonfire, this kiss is sweet and slow. There's no fire behind it just reassurance. Katsuki doesn't realize how the stone dissolves itself.

Breaking the kiss, Katsuki looks down at y/n who places a hand on his cheek and softly strokes it. He wants to sigh and kiss her again but y/n slips out of the embrace and gets another bag that needs to be secured at the dragon's back.

Before they take to the sky, y/n takes a look at Katsuki's injury one more time. She's afraid that the wound won't heal properly with Katsuki moving around so much. Katsuki thinks it's completely unnecessary but he lets y/n fret over him for a bit. Maybe he also enjoys it a bit. When she's done, they mount the dragon.

Y/n watches their surrounding with excited eyes. Somehow, she can't get enough of watching the landscape from so high above. Katsuki does not do any stupid tricks this time and just lets her enjoy the view. Now and then, he presses a kiss to her neck which makes her feel fuzzy inside.

Slowly, but steadily the landscape starts to change. The forest areas become less and less dense and few more settlements can be spotted. The air grows cooler.

They fly for two or three hours when y/n starts to notice a painful ache in her tights. She remembers what happened last time when they flew for a longer period of time. She tries to ignore the pain until it becomes too much. She turns around and asks Katsuki to land. When he doesn't understand her, she keeps pointing to the ground.

„What, you gotta piss? I've told you to go before we left, stupid woman.“, Katsuki mumbles but gives the dragon a sign to land.

After the dragon touches land, Katsuki helps y/n down. He notices how her movements are stiff. He touches her legs and notice how cool she's gotten. He scrambles for some clothes when y/n wobbles behind a tree.

There, she lifts her dress and looks at her tights. There are blisters forming and there are fine tears in her skin. „Fuck.“, she mumbles.

„Fuck?“, Katsuki's amused voice says behind her.

Y/n drops her skirt and turns around. Dramatically, she rolls his eyes to make it clear what she thinks of that comment. She's sure as hell that Katsuki has a foul mouth. He shouldn't make fun of her when she uses a swear word here and then.

„You done?“, he says putting his hand on his hips. Wordlessly, y/n wobbles back to the dragon and looks for the medicine bag. Katsuki watches her closely, not getting why she needs wound dressing.

„You stay here“, y/n tells him, „Don't look.“

She wobbles behind the dragon and sits down carefully she looks for the rash cream and some bandages. Katsuki follows her closely behind.

„Go away!“, she tells him and waves her hand. Katsuki picks up one of the bandages.

„Why do you need those? Are you hurt or what?“, he asks. Y/n gives him a mean look and keeps pointing behind the dragon.

When Katsuki doesn't move, y/n sighs in defeat. It's not like he will see anything inappropriate. It's just legs after all, y/n tells herself and starts ruffling up her skirt.

Katsuki's eyes widen when he realizes why y/n wanted him to leave. However, he does not show any signs of moving away. Instead, he very intensely stares up y/n's naked leg. Y/n makes sure lady parts are covered but can't help feeling embarrassed by Katsuki's stares. He must know this intimate. Especially when she has to prop up and spread one leg in order to get to the wound.

In all honesty, very indecent thoughts run through Katsuki's mind when he sees y/n in this position. That is until he sees the wounds on y/n's thighs. Immediately, he steps closer, kneels down and grabs y/n's knee hollow pushing her leg further apart. Y/n yelps as she almost loses balance.

Katsuki inspects the wound. „Rider's rash.“, he determines. Not uncommon if you ride a horse or dragon without proper clothes. Y/n's dress definitely falls under the category of improper clothes for riding. Katsuki wants to scold himself. He should've thought of this. It's not like y/n had any other choice but to ride with the clothes on her back since she had no others.

Katsuki lets go off her leg and grabs the rash cream.

„I-it's fine! I can do that myself!“, y/n says jittery and tries to grab the cream out of Katsuki's hand. She really doesn't want him to touch her anywhere near there. No, that's wrong. She definitely wants that but not now and not here.

Katsuki just swats her hand away and takes a big goop of cream. Carefully, he spreads her leg again applying the cream onto the wound. While he's very concentrated on treating the wound, he's also painfully aware of how close he is to the place his men would kill for. When the cream is applied he wraps a bandage around it. Without asking, he checks y/n's other leg and repeats the process.

Meanwhile, y/n's face burns in a bright red.

Once he's done, he lets go of her and pulls her skirt over her legs again. A gesture that y/n appreciates. Then, he rumbles through a bag and gets another pair of pants. It's shorter than the one he wears. He helps y/n into the pants and y/n stuffs her dress into the pants trying to use the fabric as a cushion for the wounds that already formed. Katsuki also wraps his cape around her shoulder and arms.

Then, it's time to fly again.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

They fly for the rest of the day. Only taking a quick pee break in between. While y/n is fascinated by the view for a while, she eventually grows tired. At some point, she leans back and rests her head against Katsuki's shoulder. He lets her because he knows how tiring flying can be to an untrained body. He remembers how beat he was after his first few flying lessons.

When the mighty Bear Fang Mountains come into view, Katsuki nudges y/n awake. Actually, she bolts awake and when she remembers where she is, she immediately clings to Katsuki's arms for balance.

„Wow“, she breathes at the sight in front of her. A large mountain range opens up in front of them. Are we flying lower or are these mountains higher than we fly?, she thinks.

„We call them Iron Peaks“, Katsuki tells her. He points along the range of mountains and repeats: „Iron Peaks“. Y/n follows the motion of his finger and mumbles: „Iron Peaks“. Katsuki corrects her pronunciation and y/n repeats the words until she feels Katsuki nod behind her.

Katsuki takes her hand and uses her index finger to point to a mountain to the right of them. „There's my home. There's where we're going. Back home.“, he tells her. Again, y/n repeats the last word Katsuki utters and he nods approvingly.

„Yes, we're going home.“, he mumbles into her hair.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It's not long before the dragon starts flying lower and a settlement comes into sight. Y/n instantly recognizes how it looks different from the settlements in the kingdom. The settlement is made of tents instead of brick houses. Suddenly, a feeling of nostalgia hits her. While most villages in the kingdom were assembled out of brick houses, that's not where the wandering folk lived in.

Her people also lived in tents. Portable homes that can be set up anytime anywhere. And, of course, one cannot be struck dead by falling stones. Just the sight of the arrangement of tents makes her think of her people, her parents, and her childhood. Her heart aches and she can feel tears pricking in her eyes. Quickly she rubs them away and hopes that Katsuki mistakes them as the result of the cold wind piercing her eyes. She really can't wait to sleep in comfortable leather walls again.

Katsuki's mind is too busy to notice y/n's tears. He's growing more tense with each passing second.

The dragon approaches landing and y/n can make out human figures in between the tents. When the dragon's feet stand firm on the ground, a bunch of rough-looking men walk towards the dragon with loud roaring. For a second, y/n thinks the men are going to attack them until Katsuki lets out a triumphant howl in return.

Katsuki jumps from the dragon and his men immediately tackle him. Katsuki laughs and shoves the men away playfully. Y/n feels awkward watching him greet his friends from atop the dragon, so she carefully demounts the dragon by herself. The motion grabs the men's attention.

„A woman?“, a blonde man says with his eyes as big as saucers. „I thought you wanted to go hunting. You should've taken us with you when you planned to raid a place!“, another man complaints. Katsuki shoves him roughly.

„I wasn't on a raid, you dumb fucks. Basically, found that one roaming the woods.“, he tells them.

„Our chief is a lucky one then, heh?“, the blonde grins, „Is she a good fuck? Or you kept her decent so one of us can have her?“.

Katsuki shoots the blonde an angry glare. „Shut the fuck up, Denki. That one's mine, you got that.“, he growls.

The blonde named Denki raises his hands in defeat. „Alright, chief. But what will your mother say about that?“, Denki teases. Katsuki stomps his feet.

„I'm chief and that old hag needs to bow to my decisions.“, he shoots back.

It doesn't go unnoticed by him how his men exchange uncertain glances. While Katsuki took over the regiment a few years ago, the former chief of the tribe, his mother, still holds a certain power over people.

Y/n walks closer to the men and gives the men uncertain smiles.

„Why is she dressed like this?“

„She's so small. You sure she's gonna make it around here? Their kind is not known for being mountain-weather-resistant.“

„Are her boobs big? And her hips wide enough?“

The men swarm her trying to get a good look at her. Y/n feels really uncomfortable and, by the way the men look at her, she's worried they'll try to tear the clothes off of her.

Katsuki steps in between them. „Y'all shut the fuck up. Get your asses to work. Unload the dragon, and take care of the stag! Tonight we feast!“, he yells at them and grabs y/n's arm.

The men get to work and Katsuki wordlessly drags y/n behind him deeper into the settlement. More men wait outside their tents. Upon seeing Katsuki's angry face, they decide against greeting their leader. Nobody wants to deal with Katsuki in a bad mood. They also oogle at the woman at his side.

Y/n searches for women among them to no avail. Where are they?, she wonders. Do they stay in the tents? Are they with the kids?

She doesn't find an answer to her question. Then, Katsuki arrives at his destination. A large, painted tent in the middle of the settlement. There's a small brick hut attached to its side. One of the only stone constructions y/n spotted so far.

Katsuki leads her inside. Once inside, he lets go of her arms and throws the knife he was holding onto a table at the side. Y/n looks around carefully.

There's a large bed with furs and other blankets in the middle of the room. There are multiple wooden chests on the side of the tent.

There is a small table and two chairs on the other side. And there are weapons. A lot of them. Hanging from the ceiling. In buckets on the ground. Thrown carelessly onto the trunks.

Y/n is pretty sure that this must be Katsuki's tent.

"Y/n", Katsuki says sternly. Y/n turns around carefully. Katsuki says something that sounds like an order and y/n stares at him with furrowed brows. We really have to work on this language thing, she thinks to herself while shrugging helplessly to make him see that she doesn't understand a thing.

Katsuki sighs. He grabs her arm and pulls her to the side of the tent. Behind the table, there is an opening in the tent that is closed off with another piece of leather. Pulling it away, Katsuki reveals the entrance to the small brick hut y/n saw from the outside.

He pulls her inside and a sort of bathroom comes into sight. It's sparsely furnished but has everything that is needed. In the middle of the hut is a bathtub that is already filled with steaming water.

Katsuki points at her, then the water and says: "Bath!". Y/n nods and repeats the words. Katsuki nods and turns to leave.

The hot water feels good on y/n's skin. The cool mountain air already cooled down y/n's body and she's glad she can warm herself up a bit. Also, she hasn't washed herself since before the festival at the village. Now that she thinks about it, she must really stink. She wonders if Katsuki noticed.

Embarrassed, she scrubs her skin until it is burning. Katsuki's tribe must not care too much about smells at least there are no nice soaps or scented oils in the bathroom. Just an odorless curd soap. After y/n dried herself off, she wished she had some of that bee wax lotion that her mother made. Her mother always put some lavender oil in it which y/n find quite relaxing.

When she's done, she wraps the towel she found in the hut around her body. She doesn't want to put on her old dress since it's all sweaty and gross.

Katsuki isn't in the tent when she returns. She sits down on the bed while she waits for him. When she grows cold again, she loses the wet towel and wraps herself in one of the blankets.

After a while, the opening to the tent is lifted and Katsuki steps back into the room. He acknowledges her with a curt nod.

Y/n hops off the bed wrapped in the blanket. "Can I borrow some clothes from you?", she asks him. When she sees he doesn't understand, she holds up her dress and repeats: "Clothes?".

"Clothes?", he repeats and looks at the dress and then at her. Y/n can see the wheels in Katsuki's head turning. Suddenly, his eyes widen and he looks at the dress and then at her in realization.

The realization is that y/n is naked underneath the blanket.

Katsuki swallows hard. There's a naked woman wrapped in his blanket in his tent. Quickly, he tries to shake off the thought. He starts rummaging through the chests for some clothes for her.

He finds a woolen shirt and linen pants. He doesn't have any female clothes and he makes a note to get some for her tomorrow.

Katsuki throws the clothes at y/n and y/n almost drops the blanket. Katsuki wishes she would drop it. He's curious about how she looks naked. So, he tries his luck and keeps looking at her expectantly. Maybe she'll change in front of him.

She doesn't. Actually, Katsuki staring at her makes her a bit angry. It's rude, she thinks. "Turn around!", she tells him and makes a rotating movement with her index finger.

Katsuki waits another moment in hopes she will change her mind but then turns around. It takes all the self-restraint he possesses not to peek.

When he feels her hand on his arm, he turns around again.

"Socks?", y/n asks and shows him her naked feet and Katsuki scrambles for some socks. The socks are way too big for y/n but they are thicker than her own socks.

Y/n feels a lot better now that she wears some fresh clothes even though she must look ridiculous since the clothes are way too big for her and not something a woman would ever wear.

Katsuki however can't take his eyes off her. He hasn't taken her on as his mate yet and the fact that she wears his clothes is so... intimate to him. Like she's already his.

Y/n wraps the blanket around herself again since it's still way too cold for her in the tent. Katsuki leads her to the bed and makes her sit down.

He looks at her for a moment and pets her head for a second before telling her: "Stay here".

Y/n sighs deeply. She already learned what "stay" means. He must've told her a thousand times already. But, she doesn't complain.

She's tired and not in the mood to be confronted with his strange men outside. She just nods at him and lays down. Katsuki tucks her in and presses a kiss to her forehead.

When Katsuki leaves, it doesn't take long before y/n's eyes get droopy and she slips into a slumber.

Somewhen when the sun's already down, she is woken up by loud yelling outside. There are sounds of a celebration but y/n is too tired to care. She just pulls a pillow over her head and goes back to sleep again.

She's woken up roughly by Katsuki shaking her uninjured shoulder. He holds a steaming plate into her face.

Suddenly, y/n is awake in a second. Her stomach is grumbling. While y/n eats, Katsuki disappears into the stone hut.

The food is delicious. It's the stag meat and some form of mashed potatoes but spicier. While y/n eats, she notices how quiet it has gotten outside.

Seems like the party's over, she thinks when Katsuki returns to the main room again.

The food almost falls out of y/n's mouth.

He's naked. Absolutely butt-naked. He's not even trying to hide his manhood.

Y/n throws a pillow at him.

"What?", Katsuki snarks and y/n throws another pillow at him.

When he turns fully around at her to scold her for throwing things at him, y/n slaps her hands in front of her eyes.

"Tsk", Katsuki exclaims but has to hide his grin, "What? Did you expect me to act all innocent like you? This is my home, y'know. Also, you should get used to it!"

Y/n doesn't move until Katsuki puts on some proper clothes (which for him is thin linen pants and that's it) and even then her face is still burning red.

Katsuki lays down next to her and props up his head. Even though y/n's appetite is dimmed after the naked encounter, she finishes the plate to not seem ungrateful.

After she's put the plate away on the table, Katsuki grabs her waist when she returns to his bed. While it takes y/n by surprise, she doesn't fight it. Before she knows it, she's pinned beneath him and his lips are on hers.

Katsuki kisses her feverishly, starved even. As if he's been waiting all evening to kiss her. Which, to be fair, he did. The action overwhelms y/n for a second but when Katsuki doesn't pull back and y/n wraps her head around it, she kisses back.

Katsuki lets his hands wander. He avoids any body parts that get him hit with a pillow, at least for now. Y/n mirrors his actions and runs her hands up and down his arms and back.

Katsuki forces his tongue into y/n's mouth which she gladly accepts. With a dizzy head, she acknowledges that Katsuki is an extremely good kisser. At least to her. Not that she kissed that many people before.

When Katsuki starts pressing open-mouthed kisses onto her neck and collarbone, y/n lets out a breathy sigh. Katsuki's mouth and hands on her just feel too good.

While Katsuki's dick has been hard before this, it jumps at the sound y/n makes.

There's nothing more in the world he wants right now than tearing the clothes off of her and exploring every inch of her body with his mouth.

He knows it's off-limit until they become mates and for a second he contemplates if making her come on his tongue really breaks the rules since he's technically not mating her. He decides not to test the rage of the gods.

He detaches from her neck and rolls over facing her. Y/n is left lying on her back, breathing heavily.

"You asshole", she tells him and Katsuki has to laugh.

She turns to him and Katsuki opens his arms to her. Y/n crawls into his embrace while Katsuki pulls a heavy blanket over both of them.

For a while, they lay in silence. Katsuki strokes over y/n's back and presses a kiss onto her forehead every now and then. Somewhen Katsuki's movements become slower and eventually, they stop.

He must've fallen asleep, y/n thinks. Meanwhile, she's wide awake. She snuggles deeper into Katsuki's chest and listens to his soft, steady breathing.

Somehow, she feels at ease. Even though she's been brought to this place and its strange men. She should probably feel anxious about what happens tomorrow but she can't find it in her to stress out about it.

All thoughts eventually spin back to Katsuki and how she's sure that whatever happens, Katsuki will protect her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Tag list: @graviewaviee @cosmicbreathe @tsukikoxo @nnubee @witchbishsblog @elajede @bsallergy @frxcless @berryvioo @eyesforbkg @shamelesjaroflaffytaffy @pastelbaby1111 @iamlizardgod @plvt0fvtvre @hello-peanutdoodle-blog @guccirosegold @kookiemyfeelsposts @sweetblueworm @54fangirl @sakurarr1122 @rv19 @leeliyah @king-dynamight @confused-smol-fan @xmaudx @waterstarz @pinkwhiskerglitter @adeline96 @zoom1374 @fingui @giuli-in-earth @colouringfrogssittinginleaves @futuristicallykawaiiturtle @tragedyofabrokensoul @dynakats @rebel-loves-anime @cloudxluv @itsssyagurll @sunshineandwitchery @cloudxluv @hollykanuki @atouchofmidnight @nutellaenjoyer @musicbecky @miacitocco @cassouandco @penguinlovestowrite @sleepykittycx @bakugouswh0r3 @xxjesshuxx @helenamaximoff @ssssssws-world @k1tk4tkatsuki @gh0stgirl333 @anon-mouse223 @bexxs @i-am-ms-rebel-heart @wannabeisekai @spragaraga @faemagic88 @kolakoke @faetoraa @cax-per @willy-the-witch @stardream14 @jiyuu-da @mintytalesblog @sparklyoperaroadpie @musicbecky @maria-patricia @mistermemister @katsukismrs @l0kisbitch @bakukiriswife @rebel-loves-anime @drink-water-456

@spragaraga @fudo-aki @stillcrazystacey @bakkusimpp @itsiambaby @leelee28901 @angie-1306 @miniaturebouquet @skibbiescoober @weebperson2003 @maria-patricia @alicecil87 @darlink-xoxo @novthewolf @berryvioo @all-in-the-fandoms @deftonianfr @faemagic88 @l-bozo-l @kolakoke @stxrrielle @gold24fish @notsaelty

[Please comment beneath the last update if you'd like to be tagged in future chapters]

381 notes · View notes

24hlevi · 7 months

Text

— lonely star

cate dunlap (gen v) x gn!reader

genre: hurt/comfort

summary: cate has always been hesitant to trust others, and you're the first person who wasn't afraid of her. but, can this lonely star be able to genuinely trust you?

warnings: language

wc: 2.4 k

yeah im a cate apologist so what?

from the first meeting, you knew what kind of person cate dunlap was. troubled? maybe. traumatized? so was everyone at the school. lonely? definitely. you were the first person to genuinely trust cate without any fear of her powers. at first, she was lost as to how anyone, especially you, would be accepting of who she was.

cate dunlap was a lonely star in the world. thankfully, you showed up to make it better.

“do you ever take those off?” you asked her once, gesturing to the gloves on her hands.

“no,” cate shook her head. “they never come off.”

you tilted your head to the side lightly, watching cate look down at her hands almost with shame in her eyes. you rose from your spot on the chair in the room, walking to sit down next to her with no words spoken. the blonde girl stared with those beautiful eyes you always adored, looking at you confused.

“would you take them off for me?” you asked quietly.

“what?” cate said just as quietly. “i don't think that's a good idea.” she said, nervousness evident in her eyes as she shook her head.

“i trust you, cate,” you told her.

now she looked at you with indecisiveness in her eyes, as if she was debating whether or not to do it. hesitantly, she slowly took off the gloves, immediately balling them into fists as she waited to see what you would do. she didn't know what to expect, but she definitely didn't expect you to carefully grab her hand as if she was made of glass and would break at the slightest touch, the warmth of your hand touching her own made her feel things. things she couldn't explain off the top of her head. it was a nice feeling, one she hadn't felt in a long time.

then, you raised her hand to your lips and placed a gentle kiss on it. when you looked at her again, she had tears in her eyes. holding her hand in yours, your unoccupied hand gently touched her cheek, looking back at her with genuine care and love in your eyes.

“i don't want you to be afraid anymore, cate. at least, around me. i trust you, okay? i know you wouldn't hurt me on purpose. just, please don't be afraid around me. because if no one else is, then i’ll be the one person who genuinely believes that you won't hurt me,” you told her in a soft voice.

a few stray tears fell from her eyes at your words, and she was at a loss. she couldn't respond with words, too emotional knowing she would completely break down if she tried. so, she leaned forward closer to you and pressed her lips onto yours. more tears falling when she felt you kiss back, her hands were shaking from so many different things. the fact that you willingly touched her hands without a single ounce of fear, the fact that you trusted her not to hurt you with all your heart, the fact that you were kissing her like she was any other normal kind of girl.

you grabbed ahold of both of her shaking hands, interlocking your fingers with hers and pulling away from the kiss. the two of you stared at each other for some time, until she hugged you so tightly you could barely breathe.

“thank you, for not being afraid of me,” she whispered into your neck.

from that day forward, you were the only person that cate trusted. sure, she might still wear the gloves when around others including you, but when you two were alone she never had them on. she was worried in the beginning that she might accidentally do something, but you reassured her that even if she did, you wouldn't be mad or upset about it. not everyone has full control of their powers. it was understandable. but, she still had her worries and doubts.

there would often be nights spent together in one of each other's dorm, quietly talking to one another and she would again voice her concerns.

“y/n,” cate whispered to you.

“mm? what is it?” you whispered back, looking down at her.

“why do you trust that i won't hurt you?” she asked.

“what?” you said, rolling over onto your side to see her better. “what do you mean?”

cate’s eyes averted downward to the bed when she responded. “i just…want to know why.”

reaching forward, you grabbed one of her hands, feeling her body immediately tense as you intertwined your fingers with hers. “i’ll be honest, i don't really know why. i just have a feeling you won't. i know it's not a very good answer, but it's the truth. you might have hurt people in the past, but i know you wouldn't do it on purpose to me,” you told her.

“i see,” she nodded slowly.

carefully, you wrapped an arm around her and pulled her closer to you, the two of your faces merely inches away from touching. “i know you have worries about it, cate. but please, don't be scared of it. even if it happens, i won't be upset with you. okay? no one else gets you like i do,” you quietly spoke to her.

“okay,” she nodded again.

a small smile formed on your face and you gave her a quick kiss before pulling her even closer to you. cate rested her head on your chest, listening to your steady heartbeat and holding one of your hands, playing with your fingers a little bit. she then fell asleep shortly after, feeling safe with someone for the first time in a long while.

it was nights like those that cate always remembered. no one else even dared to touch her without the gloves on, and yet, you touched her like she was normal with and without them on. she didn't understand it. why you would be so believing that she wouldn't do it to you even by accident or some random instance. you didn't even have a valid answer as to why, which left the blonde more confused.

cate believed that everyone would hate her for her powers, and the majority did, except for you. you were the only one that didn't think she would hurt. she had her worries about how you would react if she did it to someone else, and you said as long as it was with good intentions, it would be okay with you. then she grew more confused. good intentions. were there ever any good intentions at the school? not really.

cate rarely worried about using her powers on someone other than you. she always made sure there was good enough reasons to back her up, even if it was close to being irredeemable. her explanations as to why she did it were good enough, so she just stuck with those.

slowly, cate let go of her fear of using her powers on you. it hadn't happened in the months you two had been together, so she stopped worrying.

until the day it happened.

cate was having a stressful day, beyond stressful, her day was going terrible and was seemingly only getting worse. she was irritated at everything and everyone, she wanted to just scream and make everything go away. then, you showed up at her dorm room.

after knocking a few times, you walked in the dorm to see cate sitting on her bed with her hands pulling at her hair. you quickly rushed up to her and looked down at her. “cate, baby what's wrong?”

she looked up at the sound of your voice, but the glare sent your way was enough for you to take a step backwards. “leave me alone right now,” she told you.

shaking your head, you sat down next to her. “i’m not leaving until you tell me what's wrong,” you replied. “i just want to help.”

“please y/n just go,” cate sighed, putting her face in her hands that weren't gloved.

“sorry but no,” you said, grabbing one of her hands which made her look at you again. “what's wrong?”

“it's nothing,” she shook her head, pulling her hand away from yours. she could see the way your eyes were saddened at her action, but she was too upset to care at the moment. “i just want to be alone right now.”

“cate,” you said softly. “please let me help.”

“i don't need your help,” she said more aggressively. “what i need is for you to go away.”

“no, i’m not going anywhere,” you told her, grabbing her hand again.

cate stared at you with an angry glare, glancing down at your hands connected with hers and placing her unoccupied one on top of yours. “leave me alone for today.” she told you in a low voice.

the second those words left her mouth, she had realized what she had done. from the moment you stood up without a word, cate tried calling your name to get you to turn around, but it was no use. she fucked up big time. she completely forgot what she was upset about when you closed the door behind you, leaving her alone just like she wanted.

immediately fear and worries flooded cate’s mind. how were you going to feel tomorrow when you were knocked out of it? would you never talk to her again? would you find her just to express your feelings and leave her alone again? she started to freak out. she didn't know what to do, so she just sat in her room and stared at the wall in silence. surely, you would be angry at the reason why she did it, and that she did it at all. she didn't know what she was thinking, she just wanted to be alone from everyone. but, she didn't want to push you away. yet, that's exactly what she did.

the next morning, cate awoke in her same spot she fell asleep in, sitting up on her bed leaving her with a strained neck. she looked around thinking you would be there next to her, only to remember yesterday's events. “oh fuck,” she mumbled to herself.

she quickly left her dorm and went asking everyone if they knew where you were. unfortunately, no one knew. so she was left scurrying through the whole school trying to find you. by the time she gave up and was heading back to her dorm, she found you standing in front of her door for the room.

“y/n!” cate exclaimed, running up to you.

when you turned to face her, she felt her heart drop at your expression. you had new bags under your eyes likely from staying up the night before, your hair was a mess, and you looked at her with a look she was terrified of.

“do you mind if we talk inside?” you asked, getting right to the point.

“that's fine,” cate nodded her head swiftly, opening the door and walking inside with you following behind.

you closed the door behind you and sat down next to her on the bed. she looked down at the ground, playing with the material of her gloves as she anxiously waited for you to speak.

“why did you do it?” you asked her, not even looking at her.

of course that would be the first question you asked. the question she knew you would ask after she realized what she did. cate continued looking at her hands as she answered. “i…just wanted to be left alone. i didn't mean to.”

“do you not want me around anymore?” was your next question.

that one she didn't expect. her head shot up as she looked at you, quickly shaking her head. “no, no no that's not what i want. i was just stressed and needed to be alone.”

you finally turned your head to look at her, and seeing the afraid expression on cate’s face made you release a sigh. “i’m not going to leave you, cate. don't be worried about that. but, i also want you to know that i’ll always be here for you. whenever you need it, i will be here. i don't want you to think that you have to be alone anymore. because you have me. so please, don't push me away. i…love you a lot,” you told her.

cate froze upon hearing the last words you spoke. love? she must have heard you wrong. there was no way someone like you could love someone like her. it didn't work like that. she could feel tears welling in her eyes as her vision became blurry, trying to blink the tears away. “you…love me?” she asked in a tiny voice.

“yes,” you nodded. “i love you more than anyone else, and that's the truth. you're the only one i can tolerate at this fucked up school. every day is like hell here, but, you make it better. even if you don't notice it. you make my life a lot better, cate. so yes, i do love you.” you grabbed her hands and wiped the few tears falling from her eyes.

a short sob escaped from cate’s lips, and you pulled her into your arms, letting her cry into your shoulder. her grip on you was so tight that you couldn't let go even if you wanted to, and for the first time she completely broke down. she thought that no one would love her. her own family didn't anymore, so why should anyone else? she was forced to be alone for so long that she had almost forgotten what it was like for someone to genuinely love her, even after all that she's done. she was starting to believe she didn't need it, the nice feeling of being loved by someone else. but, you came into her life and changed that.

“i love you too,” cate mumbled into your shoulder. “you're the only person i care about in this shitty place.”

“i know,” you nodded, gently kissing the top of her head with one of your hands rubbing her back. “but trust me when i say i won't be leaving anytime soon. i’ll die first before leaving you.”

“let's not manifest that,” cate said, lifting her head from your shoulder. “i don't need you dying on my watch.” she poked your cheek.

“i was kidding,” you chuckled, patting her head. “but i won't leave you, i promise.”

“you better not.”

#gen v #gen v amazon #gen v prime #gen v x reader #cate dunlap #cate dunlap x reader #cate x reader #gen v imagine #gen v scenarios #cate dunlap imagine #cate dunlap scenarios

313 notes · View notes

lactoseintolerentswag · 7 months

Text

Rise Characterizations Pt. 6!!!!!!

After the turtles and Splinter, here we have the girl Ever. She's pretty spunky, I had fun analyzing her for writing.

April O'Neil Character Notes

Language Habits:

Uses bae/aave, something she could have passed on down to Raph and Mikey as they also use bae/aave

Most notably uses "mm-kay" in place of "okay"

Uses a lot of filler language, interjections, or onomatopoeia. Think "mhm", "uh huh, uh huh!", "oh yeah!"

"Ah nuts" is her go-to disappointed phrase

Grits and or strains her teeth when she's frustrated

Uses her own name (the full "April O'Neil!!!!") as a battle cry, or brings her name as a motivator i.e. "the one and only April O'Neil will solve this case!"

The more worked up she the louder she tends to be, this extends to stronger emotions such as passion or panic

Over text uses emoticons

Refers to splinter as "splints"

Refers to the turtles as "the fam"

Refers to villains/antagonists through insults rather than their names

Personality:

Adrenaline junkie, as she's often the first to jump into a fight. She also laughs in the face of danger, and was seen maniacally laughing and smiling the entirety of the gumbus episode

Jack of all trades. April has a lot of skills she's picked up from various jobs or personal adventures she's seeked out (like canoeing through the sewers in a hazmat suit and earning a crane license)

Wild and blunt. April is Loud, and rarely ever afraid to share her opinion. This can either make people draw back from her bluntness or be drawn in by her excitableness

Self-conscious. Despite her strong sense of self-esteem, April is still often motivated to impress the popular kids at school or at least fit in. She doesn't want to be seen as the weird kid, or associated with the weird kids

Persistent. April is always quick on her feet to hit back whatever comes at her. She has a good set of problem-solving skills that she's gained from all the skills she's picked up

Loyal. She's always willing to back up the turtles, and goes out of her way to keep Splinter happy with her company. Once she finds a friend it's hard to pry her away

Unlucky. Mostly in absurd or mundane ways. She has that whole curse with her birthday, but things don't often tend to go right for April O'Neil, which contributes to the disasters that cause her to get fired all the time

Miscellaneous:

Code-named "yellow submarine" by raph

Tends to have information on wifi passwords, secret exists, and access to keys from all the jobs she's been hired and fired from

Has a preference for blunt objects as weapons (most commonly bats, clubs, pipes)

Uses the environment in a fight in general

She's been part of the "warren stone fanclub" since 2010, and keeps all her ids in her wallet

Likes unicorns and cats (as seen through her brief texts with sunita and her pajamas)

Loves laser tag

Can beat Donnie at video games (if he didn't use cheat codes)

"sherlock_corn" is her handle online

Lives in an apartment/flat with her mom (showed onscreen briefly), that has its own bathroom

Has a subtly mentioned interest in fantasy, as noted by Donnie she tends to download fantasy rpgs and freaks out over cosplay wizards

Just an end note to all of you who aren't black, some offensive tropes I would stray from is making April the angry black girl. This is one of the most common stereotypes of black women in media. I wouldn't mistake April's passion or loudness for aggression. It would be a disservice to dilute her lively character into familiar but ultimately harmful tropes in media.

I am in no way saying you cannot portray April as angry, this is a powerful emotion and it should be explored with black characters, but I am saying that should not be the base of her character. Because well that's not even April's base. She's centered around fun and thrill-seeking.

Wikipedia (yes I know, But they have proven to be more dependable these past years) has a good article on the angry black woman stereotype, so that would a good place to start research on what to Avoid. In my splinter post I also provided some links on doing research on writing poc.

---

Anyway!!! We've ended our analysis trip of the main cast in s1. Next I'm thinking of picking apart our antagonists :]. Gonna take a break to work on my own fic, but stay tuned if you found any of my other posts helpful! It's been a fun ride with you all <3

#rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt #teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt april #rottmnt april o'neil #character analysis #writing #fan fic #long post #critter talks #she's the weird girl of all time #she's like lilo to me

274 notes · View notes

lucozadehulahoop · 6 months

Text

A Question of Time (Astarion x f!reader/tav) part 2/?

Chapter Summary: Astarion gets caught by Cazador in his daughter's room. Tav attempts to get him out of the situation.

Read part 1 here! part 3 part 4

tags and TW: pre-bg3! Astarion, slave!Astarion, mentions of torture and abuse, demi-goddess!tav, Cazador being all sorts of creepy, eventual NSFW (minors stay away kindly, thank you darlings)

tag list for those who asked for part 2 (if you want to be added to the tag list, just let me know!): @d0nutkaky0in @i-just-want-to-sleep-97 @omggiannarosa @dead-giirl-walking @warbwarts @mrsfullbuster500 @uwomina @iyaesakura @cheeslyy @dragon-kazansky @bambamwolf87 @chibi-chi @orsomethingelseentirely @davenswitcher @adequate-superstar

Astarion dropped to his knees and bowed his head the second Cazador stepped into the room. He couldn't even look at his Master, choosing to stare at the ground, fixating on the space between the Vampire Lord's heavy boots to anticipate the blows that were no doubt coming to him.

It was over. Whatever hell awaited Astarion next, it was going to make the past two centuries seem like a dream in comparison. That much he was certain of.

He could feel Cazador's ice-cold stare on him, yet it was his daughter he spoke to. "Step aside, my dear. I have made the terrible mistake of being too gracious with this... servant. I will personally make sure he never strays again..."

Astarion began to shake violently. For all he knew, Cazador was already making a promise to break his legs.

What he did not expect was what happened next. The young woman stepped in front of him, putting herself between him and Cazador. "Father, there has been a misunderstanding... I sneaked out and met... Astarion in a local tavern." She faked an attempt at trying to remember his name correctly. "I believe he was deeply charmed by me and offered we spend the evening together. When he brought me back here, I had to confess who I truly was and immediately realized his mistake. He acted like a true gentleman and returned me to my chambers."

Astarion didn't move a muscle. He could not have come up with a better lie himself, considering that little story painted him as a dutiful spawn who'd merely been out seeking prey for his Master. But he doubted Cazador cared. A line had been crossed, and Cazador rarely needed an excuse to torture anyone, least of all Astarion.

"Is that so, dearest?" Cazador's tone turned sickly sweet, yet he was not fooled by the shared. He'd taken a good look at the dagger on the floor and the open window. He'd already come to his own conclusions. "In that case, such a valiant display of chivalry deserves a reward, wouldn't you say? Come along, Astarion, I wish to give you the recognition you deserve..."

Astarion had lost all feeling in his limbs, but he knew it wouldn't matter because Cazador's words would have been enough to make him stand and walk like his own personal puppet. Except... they weren't.

Cazador had given him a direct order yet he hadn't budged.

The Vampire Lord seemed to notice this too, his eyes widening at the realization his influence seemed to have no hold on Astarion's mind at that moment. Astarion looked back at his Master and it was all Cazador needed to make a stride toward them, no doubt intent on dragging his slave out of the room by force when his luck struck out for a second time.

"No!" His valiant protector protested in the face of Cazador's increasingly obvious rage. Her little outburst was followed by a loud crash as a heavy bookcase fell in the middle of the room, nearly missing Cazador by an inch.

And that was when Astarion realized why Cazador kept this girl pampered and at a considerable distance from him. He was afraid of her. Of his own daughter. Terror was all that was left on his Master's face now, and Astarion had never witnessed something so satisfying ever since he'd crawled out of his own grave on that faithful night.

"I mean..." She backtracked, looking quite abashed at the mess she'd just made, more so than the thought of having nearly buried her father underneath a small library. "I would like to request Astarion stay in this wing of the castle from now on. I... have no servants, and I never see anyone all day. I believe Astarion has proven himself to be an honorable man, and I trust him. That way... I won't be tempted to run away again, and you can trust him to keep an eye on me and...report back to you in case I get into trouble again." She reasoned in a sweet voice, almost as if she were asking Cazador for a new pony.

"The reasonings you make are quite sound, my dear. But-"

"Oh, wonderful!" She cheered and looked back at Astarion. "Only if that would be an agreeable arrangement for you, Astarion. It's your choice, of course..."

Astarion stared up at her blankly. His... choice?

The spawn hadn't made a decision for himself in two hundred years. Obviously going back to Cazador meant there was a world of pain to pay for the innumerable transgressions that he'd perpetrated that night. But what about this girl? She was clearly a force to be reckoned with, and he was more than familiar with the old saying: better the devil you know...

"Tav, dearest." Cazador attempted to interject. "It is unbecoming for a noble lady such as yourself to have such a bleeding heart for the lower class. Astarion knows his place, he does not need to be asked for permission..."

Tav. Astarion knew that word well from the scriptures he'd studied for so many nights on his path to becoming a magistrate all those centuries ago. The name meant 'sign' or 'omen', the symbol of truth, perfection, and completion.

Maybe he could let himself hope one last time.

"My lady, I accept your gracious request..." And put myself in your debt.

Cazador gave him an amused look, almost as if he knew whatever freedom Astarion thought he'd just obtained was going to be extremely short-lived. After all, Tav, as far as either of them was concerned, did not know about the true nature of any of the inhabitants of the castle. Her father had more means than necessary to hide his appetites and odd schedules, but Astarion? He'd soon have to make the choice between staying up in the tower and starving or crawling back to Cazador to beg for a measly rat to feed on.

Tav smiled at Astarion's decision and helped him up to his feet.

"Well, my dear. It seems as if I can't do anything but warn you... this one barely does anything during the day and I personally wouldn't let him near any one of your dear pets... When you tire of his incompetence, be sure to return him back to me."

...💫...

Astarion was shown to a private guest room and he had an inkling of what was to come next, now that Tav had finally got him alone. If there was one thing he'd learned in all of those years was that the only thing about him that was worth anything was his body.

Now that he could think things through with a clear head, there was no doubt in his mind that Tav had 'saved' him solely because she, like many others, had come to be infatuated with him. And as much as it pained him to acknowledge he'd merely swapped an old owner for a new one, he wasn't going to look this gift horse in the mouth. He needed her protection and the fact she was already harboring affection for him would only work in his favor in the future. Maybe, just maybe, he could convince her to let him escape someday, once he was sure the bond between him and Cazador had truly been severed. he had no way of knowing if it had been Tav's presence in the room that had counteracted Cazador's powers, nor could he be sure how long that blessing was going to last.

The first step for now would be seducing her, and at least that part he was an expert in. Another blessing he could count on was that she was gorgeous, and if he truly had met her in some tavern, she'd been right in thinking she would have been one of his marks.

"I'll be leaving you now..." Tav announced, snapping Astarion out of his reverie. He looked back at her as she returned his dagger and his climbing tools to him. The weight of the gear seemed heavier than, before and he heard the distinct sound of a heavy pouch of coins in the mix. "There is a small boat that leaves the harbor in a few hours. By dawn, you should be well away from the Sword Coast... although where you'll end up I don't know."

Being out at sea at the break of day was not a realistic option for Astarion unless he wanted to burn alive with nowhere to hide. But that certainly wasn't what he took away from her words. Tav was giving him a way out, just like that. Her plan could not work for him, but she couldn't have known.

"What is your angle?" Astarion snapped, baffled beyond reason. He could not wrap his head around what she was or what she wanted with him and it was driving him insane.

"My.. my angle? Forgive me, I don't-" Tav wrought her hands together nervously, fearing she'd somehow misunderstood. All this time, she'd been certain Astarion had been crying out for help, for someone to rescue him.

"You can cut the crap now, sweetheart. I'm not as easily spooked by a falling armoire as your dear old dad is..." Astarion grinned, a slight glint in his eyes as he spoke. "That little naive act of yours though... that's the real thing about you that's terrifying. And let me the first to say, it was quite something watching you put on that show. I'm not that easily impressed."

Tav looked completely lost at his words, and Astarion admired how good she was at keeping up the act. But he was tired of it now.

"So, what does it feel like to have me all to yourself now, hmm?" Astarion inquired, his voice turning sultry as he carelessly chucked the objects she'd handed him on the bed and took a step towards her. "Is it everything you dreamed of, precious? All couped up in here by yourself, day after day..." He stroked Tav's cheek with the back of his hand gently, and Astarion would have been lying to himself if he didn't recognize the warmth ghosting over his fingers from that brief touch.

"You-you misunderstand, I don't have you. I... I heard you calling-" Tav tried to explain, but it was difficult. Would Astarion have believed her if she told him who she truly was? All that mattered now was that he could leave, so why didn't he? She must have done something wrong. It was hard putting the right words together when Astarion was so close. Her mind was completely scrambled and her face felt like it was burning up.

Astarion smirked. Finally, he was getting somewhere with trying to understand what Tav wanted with him, and he'd been right. Watching her blood rise to her cheeks, however, almost made his mind go blank for a few seconds.

What on earth was he doing? Standing there trying to figure out the impossible woman in front of him, when he should have been getting out of dodge and putting as much ground between himself and Cazador as possible?

A faint voice inside him wondered what the consequences on Tav would be if he ended up going missing, and he hated himself right after for even having such a thought.

The way out was right in front of him, and he could still count on a few more hours of darkness to make his way underground.

All he had to do was turn and run.

---

AN: aaah thank you so much for the love! Comments are appreciated and keep me writing. I'm planning on adding more chapters soon!

#astarion #astarion x reader #astarion x you #astarion fic #astarion smut #astarion ancunin #astarion angst #astarion fluff #bg3 astarion #bg3 x reader #bg3 x you #bg3 x tav #astarion x female tav #astarion x female reader #astarion x f!tav #astarion x f!reader #astarion x tav #astarion my beloved #cazador szarr

390 notes · View notes

hellenhighwater · 11 months

Note

This may be a mildly weird question, and I apologize if it is, but do you have any advice for how to figure out if a person (specifically oneself) would be a good cat owner? I love cats, and a lot of my future dreams involve owning one (or several). However, I often worry that I wouldn't be a good cat owner. When I was a kid, I was often nervous/skittish around animals because I couldn't predict them and was afraid of getting scratched or bitten. I'm a lot better now than I used to be (will actively seek to interact with my friends' pets, have been trusted to look after peoples' dogs for short periods of time), a lot of my instinctive reactions to being startled by animals are still . . . not entirely helpful. (Not directly harmful! I would never! But stuff like freezing up or pulling away in such a way that it can give the wrong signal to animals.) Plus, I'm not always great at picking up cues/body language from people, and based on what I've read, that's about 75% of how animals communicate, so even during good interactions, I'm always a little worried that I'm doing something wrong because I'm missing some cue.

Again, I love cats and would very much like to have one or more someday. But I only want to do that if I can be sure that I'm going to be able to give any cats of mine a good life, and I don't want to get a cat only to have to rehome it a few months later. Any tips on how to handle all this?

Thanks so much for your time and, more generally, for the delight of seeing Malice and Vice (and the kittens!) periodically on my dash. Your posts about them always brighten my day. <3

It sounds like you'd be a good owner to the right cat, and that you may want to find someone who can help you pick that cat out when you're in a position to adopt one. If you're lucky, a local shelter or rescue may be able to help you with this. If you can, call ahead and explain that you're looking for your first cat, and would like some help finding that one; ask if there's a good time to come meet some cats where someone who knows the current cats well could maybe point you to one that might be right. Also, if a personality profile for a cat includes "good with kids," that probably means they're going to be tolerant of any mistakes you might make re: body language.

You should definitely look for an adult, at least six years old, maybe even a cat in the senior category (which, depending on how a shelter or rescue categorizes cats, can be any cat over the age of 10. Cats can live a long time, so 10 is really not that old.) Try to not get attached to specific looks and just go by personality.

Cats have a lot of personality variety, and there's tons of cats out there that are truly very friendly and cuddly, and really just need someone to meet their basic needs and shower them in affection. An adult cat that has lived with people before, or who was just a friendly stray is probably going to take it fine if you freeze up or pull back suddenly, and if they're old enough to have become chill, will just walk away if you're bugging them. Crucially, you do not want to try to take a difficult or traumatized cat as your very first one. Those cats need help, true, but you need to learn first.

You can learn a lot about body language for cats online, but mostly you learn it by exposure. Plus, cat body language can be very individual-specific, so it's fine to just learn over time what your cat is saying.

There's tons of cats that are just sweet-natured. A'Tuin, my momma foster, would make a great first cat for someone! She's not shy about coming up and asking for attention, and will even use her paws to pull my hand to her face for ear scratches. She's good with not using her claws, has never tried to nip or bite, and mostly just wants to be looked after and cuddled. And there's tons of cats like her out there.

#I actually picked mal and vice by looks specifically because I didn't really have strong personality preferences #Vice particularly fell into the category of a Difficult Cat #and i like all sorts of cat personalities so that was fine

272 notes · View notes

cute-as-buttons · 4 months

Text

could not resist trying my hand at a drabble after seeing this post by @wanderingbards

spoilers for act 1 under the cut!!

(no traps here.)

“we're good, mira.“ you smile. ”see? everything's fine.”

you stand there, and a moment too late you realise that maybe, just maybe, you'd perhaps been wrong.

and as you live through the novel experience of your body being crushed by a rock, you feel a tug on your stomach. And-

[loop 1]

you sleepily open your eyes. your body feels sore.

were you on the ground too long?

you close your eyes again and breathe out. around you, you can hear the chirping of birds, and you know just a few moments away, is the bright and chattering town of dormont, who've still managed to keep up the levity even though the world might end tomorrow.

but it won't. because you and your friends will stop the king and save vaugard.

after all this time, your journey is nearing its end.

you smile, thinking of how much they've all grown since you've known them. you've been travelling for as long as you can remember, and while your memory has never been your greatest strength, you do know that this is the happiest you've ever been.

the sun is shining, peaking from behind the clouds, the air is warm and you and your party will make sure that the warmth carries over into tomorrow.

you will win. you have to.

(get up, siffrin. you have a country to save.)

you dust the stray leaves that found your way onto your cloak and hat when you hear a voice calling out your name.

“-frin!”

oh, yeah it's almost midday, you probably overslept. oh well, you had a nice nap.

you yawn and call out.

“i'm here!”

you barely get in a “hey, mira-!” she crushes you in a hug. you stiffen, your arms hanging at your sides. you don't know how to react.

is…this the first time she's done that? hugged you?

huh. weird.

she pulls back a second later, and you're about to crack a joke when you see her face.

mirabelle has always been an anxious person, but this feels…different. somehow.

she's always been anxious, but right now she looks terrified.

“i'm so sorry, i didn't mean to touch you, i was just so afraid i wouldn't find you here-” she says, clasping her hands together. she looks like she's about to explode in a ball of anxiety and burst into tears.

(didn't mean to touch you?)

you're so confused.

“hey, hey, mira,“ you say, gesturing to her. ”slow down. breathe with me?“

you put your hand on your chest and gesture for mirabelle to follow.

deep breath in. deep breath out.

you smile a little at her when she stops shaking.

”better?“

she nods.

”okay, now, what's wrong? what happened?“

something about you is bothering her. but you don't know what.

”i…“ mira looks at you, almost like she's in…awe? “do you not remember?”

your breath catches at that.

(what is it, what did you forget this time? was it a birthday, an anniversary? what did you forget??)

mirabelle looks upset.

YOU MADE MIRABELLE UPSET!!

(You need to rectify your heinous crime right now.)

“no, of course i remember,” you say quickly, trying desperately to figure out what you might've forgotten. “we were supposed to meet at the clock tower, and tomorrow we go and defeat the king and save vaugard! right?”

you look to her for confirmation. she looks at you like she's going to cry.

(wait…)

”wait,“ you say, shaking your head in confusion. ”what did you mean that you were “afraid you wouldn't find me here”? i told you guys i'd be here if you needed me right?“

(did you forget to did you forget to did you forget to did you-)

something in mira's face changes. she sighs and shakes her head. you're so so confused.

and you can tell that mira doesn't seem to be in the mood for answers. you get it. so…

”did you,” you start, smiling a little. a little smirk just to let her know you're teasing. “fall asleep and have a nightmare?”

it's an out, and she takes it.

she shakily nods and tries to laugh. it comes out more as a whimper.

“yeah, i guess that must've been it,” she says. “i'll be in the town if you need me.”

you watch her leave.

something is going on with her, and you don't know what it is, but you intend to find out.

maybe something happened while you were asleep. you should

#isat act 1 spoilers #isat #in stars and time #in stars and time spoilers #might make this a whole fic if ppl wanna read more<3 #isat siffrin #isat mirabelle #sara scribbles

73 notes · View notes

azurlily · 1 year

Text

Day 9 of 31 of the yandere month May challenge. This yandere is more than intense so DARK DUCKING THEMES.

So my mental health hasn't been the best lately. I'm sorry I didn't post day 8, I'll be getting it out whenever I can. This one ain't all that long, I apologize.

Azula has been your "friend" for a good couple years. When you start pulling away, you see just how fucked up she is.

Yandere!Azula ANGST

"It's not a big deal."

Over and over again. You hear those words leave Azulas mouth. She always has a reason, you hate it. You hate that you cant just say no to her. To her no, means "willing to just don't want to."

You've told her time and time again. She refuses to listen, Azula thinks that it's fine. She's not getting hurt, she's not getting in trouble. She thinks it's okay and that you enjoy it. She thinks you enjoy being her punching bag, her scapegoat, her guard. Her everything.

All of the truly important people have been replaced, by you no less. You hate it, hate the idea and hate the jobs. It isn't fun and more times than not it's just Azula saying or doing bad things. You thought she'd grow out of that.

Azula always called you a friend, and you did too. You didn't notice her relying on you, you didn't know what it ment. To Azula, giving up so much power, to her ot means she trusts you. She trusts you more than any other friend.

You're not though, not her friend. No, to her, to Azula you are a suitor. And a good one at that. She wants to marry you, and she assumed it was obvious from how she acted around you. You chalked it up to her using you.

One day, oh that day. Azula had wanted to test one of her new tricks on you. In reality, she wanted to hurt you so you'd need to rely on her for once. It was a smart plan in her mind, except you hate the power she holds over you. So why would you give her more?

You didn't. When she attacked you, you fought back. You didn't(couldn't) win, but that's okay. You just showed Azula you aren't her puppet. You aren't her toy for when she's bored.

You had fallen to the ground. You were shaking, you're not used to trying to hard in fights. Azula really is on another level. Speaking of Azula, she was standing over you. Pissed. Why would you fight back? She knows(thinks) she isn't subtle, she assume you figure out her plan.

Did you not want to be coddled? Well too bad. Seeing how hard she hurt you, the chance of you getting out of bed for the next few days. They're utterly slim.

You had found your way up, trying to walk away. Azula tried helping, but you flinched and pushed her away. You told her to stay away, and this time as well as every other time. No means no. She needed to understand that before coming near you again.

"What? What the hell are you talking about? I know that no means no, I've never forced you to do anything. You always changed your mind!"

Lies. They're lies and she knows it. You can see it on her face. You walk into the palace, into your room. You refused food, water, and most importantly Azula. Anytime she tried coming in, it was like you just knew. Like you had a sixth sense for her(for danger).

Finally Azula decided that this whole "giving you space" thing. It wasn't going to work, neither would apologizing, mainly because she wouldn't. Instead she broke into your room, it was late, so late you'd fallen asleep. She stood above your bed, her cheeks glowing red.

"You look so cute when you're sleeping. If only your actions were as cute during the day."

She puts a hand on your cheek. A few stray flames warming your cheek. You feel it, feel the warmth. You shoot up, slamming your hand against Azulas chest. It didn't do anything but surprise her. She stood there, she looked like a kid getting caught stealing a cookie.

Your eyes finally met, you were afraid of what you had seen in hers. Frenzy. Pure fucked up, frenzy. She looked at you the way you'd look at prey, but at the same time. The way you'd stare at your partner of 10 years. With unmoving, and unwavering adoration.

Finally you move your hand away from her chest. You scooch further into the bed. Away from her. You ask her why she's here, what she wants. You see the frenzy die down, slowly calming down. A dark smile, Azulas face finds it way to her face.

"I'm here because you refused to let me in. What do I want? In terms you'll understand. . .you. I want you in every sense of the word, and I've almost convinced my father. Just a little more and you'll be my wife."

You were appalled by her words. You tell her to get out, you yell that she's a monster. She smile is still there, it's different now though. Before it was smug, cocky, scary, mean. Now it's dark, cold but at the same time hot, psychotic, and down right fucked up. It looks like someone you'd see from her father, that monster of a man.

"You will be my wife. Cry all you want, I'll be here to catch you when you fall. I intend to make you perfect, all I have to do is help force you to love me."

Her grip tightens, the smile fading, but the darkness not leaving her eyes. She leans closer, her forehead pressed against yours.

"I'll make you see. I'm better, better than anyone. I don't need to hurt you for that."

"I'm sorry for hurting you, but please love me."

Those are the words that refuse to leave her mouth. The words she could have said, if not for her pride.

"Hate me if you want. Giving in though, that would make me nicer. You know it too, just-"

You slapped her across the face. You yelled at her and probably woke a few servants. Your glare is hard and unwavering.

"Fine then. Violence wasn't my first choice, but you refuse to listen."

That night all you felt was the excruciating pain of Azulas fire. The morning after she was different. Not colder, nor did she have those crazy eyes. She was just herself, if not a bit touchier. She acted like she'd done nothing wrong, and even bragged to Mai about you accepting her proposal.

You just sat and listened, trying to hold the tears back. You didn't notice it, but Mai did. You didn't notice how no matter how long she talked to Mai, her eyes never left you. When they did, it was to blink, or to looked away when you looked at her.

Azula knows, she knows what's she's done. She knows she'll end up living with it, that in reality this is just a step to changing her relationship with you. Azula knows she's a monster in your eyes, and that not fine. It's never going to be fine. Sadly she brought this upon herself.

All Azula can do it hope the gifts, the attention, the love. She hopes it's enough, because if not, if not. . . She might do something to herself she's going to regret later.

#atla #avatar the last airbender #azula x reader #azula #yandere azula #yandere azula x reader #yandere month challenge #wlw #lesbian #angst

353 notes · View notes

bestworstcase · 2 months

Note

I have a question about some of your Salem thoughts

If Salem is 110% certain that she can take down the Gods (assuming that's her goal since we don't actually know), why wouldn't she communicate her plan to Oz? Especially if she truly doesn't want anyone to die like you say. Oz would jump at the bit if Salem said "Hey I want to stop fighting" since that would mean their shadow war would stop. I really don't think Oz likes the Gods either, and even if he's afraid of them, if *Salem* is that confident she can stop them (she's far from an idiot), I'm sure he'd at least hear her out (which would tell Salem a LOT).

If she's that confident and truly doesn't want to fight, why wouldn't she tell Oz her new plan? And why would she kickstart her plan by attacking the kingdoms/Academies? Surely she could find a way to steal the Relics without flat out attacking them (like sending in double agents to take the Maiden powers)? Like... she would've known she'd get people killed, including children and innocent people. Even if she did damage control (which I think is just strategic, why bother going after people if she's focusing on the Relics? She's not gonna waste precious time and resources), she surely knew people would get caught in the crossfire.

Don't get me wrong, I like what you bring to the table!! Your posts are thought provoking and unique. But I can't see Salem being somehow secretly good. I don't think the show is setting her up that way, and I think she's a fantastic villain, so from my own perspective, doing that kind of twist would be a disservice to her character. I don't think she's inhuman or a complete and total monster who should go, but she's definitely not a good person especially if she can't communicate that she supposedly doesn't want people dead. She seems to be an "the ends justify the means" kind of person, and the show I think has stated that that isn't a good mindset i.e. Ironwood.

Sorry, I rambled and completely strayed from my point 😅 I don't mean to be mean if I come across that way. I hope my ask is interesting or thought provoking though :P

my position is that salem is right, not that she’s secretly good—that is an important distinction. i think she sees the gods clearly for what they are, thinks the divine ultimatum repulsive and unjust, wants remnant to be free, and believes that humanity is transcendent over their creators; she also, quite plainly, does not have any compunction about doing whatever it takes to achieve her ends and while i do think she is still fully capable of and driven by love, she is so TERRIFIED of being hurt again and so CERTAIN that no one could ever care for her that when she does care for someone else it comes out in very, very twisted and often cruel ways. she’s not good, she’s not nice, she’s just right.

equally the heroes are good but not right, because they have yet to really grapple with the premise of the divine mandate (that humanity as it exists right now does not deserve to exist) or their own role in upholding it (their immediate goal is survival, but when they envision the ending of this war they imagine salem driven back and the relics squirreled away again in hope of at best everlasting stalemate). the point of structuring the narrative this way is that neither side can get to the proverbial good ending alone; they need to work together, salem’s ends with the heroes’ means.

like. she’s evil. lol. that’s not in question and i think it goes without saying that she is doing evil things so i don’t feel the need to make a “but she’s still evil though” disclaimer every time i try to tease out what’s going on in her head. notice how my reaction to salem razing vale was OH GLINDA LAYS SIEGE TO THE EMERALD CITY, WE’RE REALLY IN IT NOW and not, like, shock or dismay that salem would do such a terrible thing. brgdfjs

(i DO think she has mostly been trying to avoid ozma and not reciprocating the shadow crusade against her prior to about fourteen years ago and that she isn’t about wanton destruction or killing for the sake of it; and in that sense i think she’s not as bad as the general fanon reading. but that comes with the territory of thinking she has actual reasons for doing what she does as opposed to being, like, a genocidal lunatic.)

anyway. to your questions. the short answer is she’s just as scared of oz as he is of her.

“but he’s the good one!”—think about this from her perspective for a minute. set aside your opinion of her and oz, presuppose for the moment that i’m correct on her motivations, and consider what everything ozma’s done in the last few thousand years looks like to her.

she knows that the gods were monsters. she witnessed them slaughtering the whole world and she saw how little it mattered to them after. she was alone for millions of years, and then hated and feared for thousands of years because she didn’t look human. all that suffering because the gods are punishing her for praying to them. yes?

then ozma returns to her, somehow. he doesn’t explain how or why—maybe he tells her he just doesn’t know—but that’s alright. what matters is that he’s here. he asks what happened to her, and she tells him the truth: the gods ended the world. cursed her. killed everyone. she was alone for so long. (maybe not the whole truth: there are things she’s afraid to say, because the gods did it all to punish her, and it’s her fault, and she’s so scared that he’d despise her if he knew everything. the only reason for her to fear ozma would reject her is if she blamed herself. you don’t hide things out of shame if you don’t feel ashamed of them.)

they learn each other again. fall in love all over again. things are finally okay. they fix up her house. they’re happy together. one day ozma tells her that he’s worried about how divided people are. she wants so badly to make him happy; she would move mountains for him. salem herself has no interest in ruling over people as a god—if she did, she wouldn’t have been living alone in a rotting shack in the middle of nowhere—all that enthusiasm is for him. to support what he wants.

they build a following, found a prosperous kingdom, start a family. four children! how long do you think they were married—ten years? twenty? and the whole time, the whole time, ozma was keeping these secrets from her. that the god of light, who’d condemned her to eternal suffering for praying to his brother, who’d shown utter indifference to the deaths of millions, had sent him back to redeem humanity FROM HER SINS, from what SALEM did. that the point of all this is cleansing humankind of her defiance and inviting THAT MONSTER to remnant to judge whether this world deserved to be subjugated under the brothers’ tyranny again or else be put to death.

imagine how she must have felt when ozma finally told her the truth, knowing that the first thing she told him was that the gods ended the last one. imagine the sickening realization that their whole marriage is built on a lie, because she would never, ever, ever have agreed to help him unite the world if she had known what he sought to unite them for, and ozma knew she never would. that he deceived her! manipulated her into serving the will of a god she knows to be a monster!

and even then—even to the very end—she loved him enough to try. she was willing to forgive all of that and figure out a way to move past it together, and the only thing she asked was that he walk away from his task of submitting this world to the judgment of THAT MONSTER. and he wouldn’t do it.

there’s a gap we don’t get to see, in between ozma backing away from her and salem catching him leaving with the girls, but we can infer that ozma walked out of that room and salem didn’t. imagine how she felt. ten years, twenty years, however long it was, and he was lying to her through it all, and he left her with hardly a moment’s hesitation when she refused to help him enact THAT MONSTER’S retribution against herself. because that is, ultimately, what this is all about; humanity is found guilty by association with her.

imagine how she felt. used. worthless. duped. like a fool for ever trusting him. did he ever love her at all, or was that a lie, too?

when she caught him in the hallway later that night, they both attack each other in the same instant. ozma remembers her attacking him first, but their volleys meet in perfect symmetry and right before salem throws her first bolt of magic, her eyes flicker down in surprise as she tracks the motion of his staff (which we see in the previous shot)—salem remembers him attacking her first.

because they were both so tense and scared and angry at each other that they snapped in exactly the same moment.

their battle is so intense they blow up the castle, and when the smoke clears, salem is a pile of ash. ash! he incinerated her! imagine how enraged you have to be to burn someone to ash. that level of fury, of absolute hatred of her, is literally burnt into her memory as the last thing he did to her before she managed to kill him, inextricably twisted around the guilt and unbearable grief she feels for her children.

he’s dedicated all but a handful of his lives since then to getting rid of her. finding a way to destroy her. (how far is he willing to go? what would happen if salem tried to move on, find community and solace somewhere far away from him? would he come after her? would he follow his god’s example and go after the people she cared about to punish her? is she willing to risk that he might?)

do you think salem understands why ozma did any of this? she doesn’t. she doesn’t get the luxury we do of jinn narrating his side of the story and showing us the anguish he felt, wanting so desperately to be with salem but eaten alive by terror of dooming the world for his happiness. she doesn’t know.

all she knows is how he treated her: the secrets, the deception, the manipulation, the immediate and absolute rejection when she told him no, the explosively violent anger at the end, then centuries upon centuries systematically erasing her from history and enforcing her exile whilst searching for the relics he needs to summon his god for the final judgment. which she knows will inevitably end in the annihilation of the whole world and yet more torture for her with no hope of reprieve, because if all of this was not enough to satisfy the god of light’s grudge against her for, again, just praying to his brother, nothing ever will.

salem feels about ozma now the way blake felt about adam. why did he lie to her, why did he use her, why does he keep coming back, why won’t he just LEAVE HER ALONE, hasn’t she suffered enough, hasn’t she been punished enough, when will it be enough—and intertwined with that, she is being EATEN ALIVE by the conviction that no one could ever truly care about her or feel for her or want to help her or think that she deserves help or even just see her as a person, because if ozma—ozma, the one who saved her from her father’s tower, who knew her and loved her before all of this happened—if ozma thought her so worthless that he would rather serve a god who ended the last world and promises to condemn this one too than suffer her to exist at all in this world, why the fuck would anyone else be any different?

thousands of years later, she still flies off the handle when anyone lies to her. (except cinder. but cinder is always the exception, to every rule.) there’s a reason she recruits the kind of people she does—desperate, broken, angry people starving for something she can promise to give them if they make themselves useful to her—and it’s because she does not believe that she can get anything better than strictly transactional relationships with people who have literally nothing and nowhere else to turn. and when she actually cares about someone? she fights herself tooth and claw over it because she desperately doesn’t want to open herself up to more heartbreak. look at how erratic and cruel she is with cinder.

it’s not rational. salem is smart and very, very tactically shrewd but she is making all of her plans and all of her choices from the assumption that she is and will always be alone in this, because she is unlovable, because she is worthless, because she is the reason this world is damned. and she’s terrified of ozma because to her everything he does suggests that his conviction and dedication to the god of light has never wavered. she cannot see his doubt. she cannot see his misery. she cannot see how much he misses her and desperately wants to make amends. all she can see is that he’s zealously guarding the relics and spreading his god’s word and training children to fight and die in the name of keeping her exiled.

why doesn’t ozma just go to her and tell her he wants to make amends? because he’s terrified she’ll never forgive him and terrified that he’ll damn the world to annihilation if he follows his heart. they’re the same. they’re exactly the same.

but this is also what makes it so possible—even easy—for salem to undergo a villain-to-hero arc, because the only thing that needs to happen is a spark of real hope. that someone, anyone, could really care about her. like. the things she says in her soliloquies about the transformative power of hope? “even the smallest spark of hope is enough to ignite change,” and “it’s true that a simple spark can ignite hope, breathe fire into the hearts of the weary…”—that’s her. one small reason to hope. that is all she needs to change.

she doesn’t want to be razing kingdoms to the ground or cutting a bloody path through children to get those relics. she is willing to do it because she truly, genuinely, from the depths of her soul believes that it’s the only way to free herself from the torture she’s been subjected to for millions of years. she’s driven to this by desperation. she won’t keep doing it if she’s given a reason to feel less desperate.

but she does need to be given a reason, first. she’s hemorrhaging. this is why the winnowing of her inner circle and the split between everyone else in vacuo versus salem + cinder + summer in vale is important; Those Two are the ones she cares about—technically we don’t know for sure regarding summer yet, but the level of trust she has for the lieutenant holding beacon is suggestive—and that being reciprocated is what ignites her hope.

#she IS a fantastic villain #but what makes her so compelling as a villain is all the contradiction and tension in her character #how deeply she loves vs her deep conviction of being unlovable. not wanting to hurt people vs believing it’s the only way to free herself.#everything she does is so intensely personal and so circumscribed by the fear of rejection #these opposing forces drive change because they are pushing and shoving against each other inside her mind and the moment of culmination #occurs when one triumphs over the other. and then she changes in what i expect will be a startlingly dramatic fashion #(that doubles as writing advice btw if you want to write dynamic character arcs put unreconcilable contradictions in your characters)

39 notes · View notes

themultifandomgal · 1 year

Text

Kelly- Meeting Him

I turn the key in my car again irritated that my car won't start. Groaning I get out of the car and slam the door behind me. Leaning on the car I ring Connor but he doesn't answer, he's probably at work at the hospital. Sighing I end the call

"Sorry is everything ok?" A handsome stranger asks me

"I'm fine don't worry, just a broken down car"

"You want me to take a look at it?"

"Sure, knock yourself out" I say watching as he opens up the hood of the car "I'm YN Rhodes by the way" I stick my hand out for the guy to shake

"Rhodes as in Connor Rhodes?"

"Yeah that's my twin brother"

"Kelly Severide" he shakes my hand "how come I haven't see you around before?" I take in a deep breath

"I tend to keep to myself really. Don't usually do bars or going out in general, but tonight I was on a date. Went pretty shit" I chuckle thinking back to my date

"How so?"

"The guy wouldn't stop talking about himself. Liked to drop in the fact he had a yacht every couple of minutes" both Kelly and I chuckle

"Well, I'm afraid it looks like your going to need a new car battery"

"Great" I groan with annoyance

"I'll give you a lift home"

"Oh no it's absolutely...."

"Don't say ok or it's fine. I'll drop you off home"

"Thank you"

It's about a 15 minute drive and the whole tome we just chat about ourselves and jobs. Kelly tells me he's a firefighter while I tell him that I work for the family business with the numbers. When we arrive I get kind of disappointed that our chat has to end so I offer him a drink inside, to which he agrees to. As soon as I open the door, my black German Shepard greets me

"Hello my baby" I squish her face in my hands and kiss her. I look back at Kelly who's smiling "sorry I should have warned you that I have a dog. Her names Nyx she's super friendly so be prepared for cuddles"

"She's beautiful"

"Thank you. I rescued her a couple years ago, kept me company since then. Do you want a beer?"

"Sure" I walk over to the kitchen with Kelly and Nyx following me "you've got a nice place"

"Thanks it's not much but it's good enough for me and this girl" I give Nyx a head rub then open up the fridge and hand Kelly a cold beer and take one for myself. We go back to the living room where Nyx climbs onto the sofa next to me and places her head on my lap

"How long have you lived in Chicago?"

"Forever. Connor was the one who left us all as soon as he could. Clair, our younger sister was bitter about Connor leaving us with our father"

"And what about you?"

"At first yeah. I became a mother figure to Clair and I resented Connor for leaving when I couldn't. I then soon realised that the reason I hated him was only because Connor did what I wanted to do. Leave the family business, you know I actually wanted to be a firefighter" I sip my beer

"Then why don't you do it?"

"Dad" I give Kelly a sad smile "can't do it to him. Probably will end up giving him a heart attack"

"You shouldn't give up your dreams because your scared your dads going have a hissy fit" sighing I get off the couch and go to the kitchen to grab us both another beer. What I don't realised is Kelly has followed me in, until I turn around and face him. He tucks away a stray hair "you should do what you want to do. If your dad doesn't like it then so be it"

"It's not as easy as that. If I go against him I literally loose everything. My dad pays for my car, my house. Of course I don't want him to do, but if I leave the company all of that stops and I will have no income. I've had one beer and I'm pouring my heart out to you. I'm sorry"

"Don't apologise"

After quite a few beers we both end up drunk. Not wanting to worry about Kelly driving or worrying if he's home safely I tell him to stop the night. We end up in bed together, for the first time since having her, Nyx slept on the floor.

#kelly severide x yn#kelly severide imagine #kelly severide #chicago fire #one chicago #one chicago imagine #kelly severide x oc #kelly severide x reader

137 notes · View notes

esther-dot · 6 months

Note

i think people vilify harry a little too much lol like yeah he’s an asshole but he’s not an abuser?

So, I didn’t know this but an anon told me the Hound fans/Sansan shippers criticize him which is absurd imo. The Hound threatened Sansa’s life repeatedly, insulted her, and then assaulted her, so I don’t think they have any grounds to object to Harry’s interactions with Sansa which are far less horrifying.

If we're not comparing this to a degenerate and just looking at him as himself, I'm still not much of a fan. He's upset about the match with Sansa, so we can decide not to judge him too harshly for making Sansa cry, but this comment about the mother of his child is just...yikes?

Your bastard daughter Alys, Alayne thought, but what she said was, “That one had a different mother, though.” “Yes. Cissy was a pretty thing when I tumbled her, but childbirth left her as fat as a cow, so Lady Anya arranged for her to marry one of her men-at-arms. It is different with Saffron.” “Saffron?” Alayne tried not to laugh. “Truly?” Ser Harrold had the grace to blush. “Her father says she is more precious to him than gold. He’s rich, the richest man in Gulltown. A fortune in spices.” “What will you name the babe?” she asked. “Cinnamon if she’s a girl? Cloves if he’s a boy?” That almost made him stumble. “My lady japes.” “Oh, no.” Petyr will howl when I tell him what I said. “Saffron is very beautiful, I’ll have you know. Tall and slim, with big brown eyes and hair like honey.” Alayne raised her head. “More beautiful than me?” Ser Harrold studied her face. “You are comely enough, I grant you. When Lady Anya first told me of this match, I was afraid that you might look like your father.”

He lost interest in Cissy because she gained weight, handed the mother of his child off to someone else as a problem to solve, and chased after a prettier girl. He's shallow, and it's a little concerning he not only tells all this to Sansa but then indicates that she isn't as attractive as his new baby mama, so I'm doubtful he'd change his ways once married? Sansa picks up on this and says she'll "be all the spice you’ll want," but is that a fate I want for my girl? To constantly have to vie for her husband's attention, try to entice him all the time to keep him from straying?

The guy is definitely a better option than some people Sansa is shipped with, but with how he spoke of Cissy to someone he doesn't know...would I want Sansa to be married to a man who might belittle her that way? Behind her back? To her face? He's no Hound, he's no Tyrion, but I wouldn't want that for Sansa.

Maybe that sounds like I'm unfairly vilifying him too, anon, but that's where I'm at on Harry!

#dot chat

43 notes · View notes

lythea-creation · 2 months

Text

Brighten My World - Tasneem x fem reader (Chapter 2)

Previous Chapter

warnings: grieving

word count: 1.121

-------------------

Before Tasneem had become my girlfriend she had kept me a secret. She would only meet me at school when nobody was around. Her friends had had no idea that we were even interacting at all.

But now it had all changed. They all did not know the whole truth because we had decided to wait a bit longer to tell anyone about our kind of relationship. But Tasneem was trying to integrate me in her friend group.

“Have you taken in a stray?”, was Hiba's first reaction when Tasneem had introduced me to her friends.

“Shut it, Hiba”, Tasneem shot back angrily. “I won't let it slip if you try to pull her down.”

“Woah! What's gotten into you? First Sarah and now that freak? What are you trying to accomplish? Improving your status by taking in outcasts? Is Shams next then?”, Hiba mocked her.

“You know what? Forget it!”, Tasneem exclaimed and pulled me away from then.

I could feel Hiba's eyes boring into my back.

“I'm sorry, (f/n). I should have expected Hiba to act out. If I had known it, I wouldn't have tried in the first place”, Tasneem stated. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, it's fine. Don't worry about it”, I brushed it off.

“Please don't lie to me, okay? You don't have to pretend around me”, she assured me.

We were coming to a hold between two buildings, a corridor where barely any students came by.

Tasneem was still holding my hand, waiting for a reply.

“Of course it always hurts a bit to be rejected. But I didn't really hope for anything. So it doesn't bother me too much”, I explained.

“You shouldn't stop hoping for good things to happen, (f/n)”, Tasneem considered.

“Yeah, I know”, I admitted. “After all you're the best reminder that there's still hope. I guess it's just a bad habit I picked up.”

Tasneem sent me a sympathetic smile.

“Speaking of bad habits … have you finally talked to your mom about seeing a therapist?”, I wondered.

Her body language was answer enough.

“Tasneem, you need to work through it all. I can only help you so much and you never know when I'm not around anymore”, I remarked.

“Why? Are you planning to leave me already?”, she worried.

“Of course not”, I reassured her. “Sometimes you don't have a choice though.”

“That's not the first time you're saying that”, she recalled. “Why are you worrying about that so much?”

“It's my thing I have to deal with”, I alluded.

The ringing of the school bell signaled the end of the break before we could deepen the topic. I did not know if I should curse or thank it as this conversation was just as tough as it was inevitable if I wanted to build a trustful relationship with Tasneem.

After school I was visiting Tasneem again. Her mom was not even questioning my presence anymore, already expecting me to join them for dinner.

Shortly after entering Tasneem's room we ended up on her bed in a make-out session, hoping that her mom would not walk in on us.

When we were both too exhausted to continue we switched over to cuddling.

“Do you wanna tell me now? About the thing that's hurting you so much?”, Tasneem questioned.

“I haven't worked through it yet. The last time I tried to tell you I broke down crying”, I reminded her.

“I wouldn't mind comforting you”, she noted. “But you don't have to tell me if you don't feel ready for it.”

Tasneem was caressing my cheek with her hand, a gesture that was relaxing me to no end.

“What if it makes you uncomfortable?”, I considered.

“Why should it?”

“It's about the last person I had a crush on, my first love”, I confessed.

She took a deep breath. “You lost her?”

I nodded slightly, holding onto her other hand for support.

“I was too scared to tell her. And now I never will. That was the only reason why I was able to gather the courage to tell you about my feelings for you”, I proposed.

“And why you're always afraid that we won't stay together as well”, she concluded.

“Yeah”, I whispered.

Silent tears were running down my cheeks. But with Tasneem still caressing my cheek and having her to hold onto, I could hold it in check. Stop it from paralyzing me again.

“It was Layan”, I enlightened her.

Tasneem gasped at the revelation. Now I could see tears in her eyes as well.

“She was the closest person I had and Rania, her best friend, told me that Layan loved me, too. But Layan didn't want to admit it to herself. So she tried to be with someone else, which killed her in the end”, I declared.

My crying was getting stronger the more I was talking. I was choking on some words, but continued anyway: “If I had just told her, she might still be alive. It feels like it's all my fault.”

Now I could not control the sobs anymore.

Tasneem switched over to holding me in a tight embrace, until my crying settled down again.

“I'm so sorry you have to endure all of this”, she whispered. “I wish I could make it better.”

“You are”, I uttered, clinging even more to her.

We stayed like that for a while, my breathing regulating itself.

Tasneem placed a kiss on my head. “I love you”, she proposed.

“I love you, too”, I mumbled into her chest. “Thank you for wanting to be with me.”

“You were the one who started helping me first, remember?”

“Doesn't matter”, I pointed out. “That doesn't oblige you to be my girlfriend.”

“True”, she stated. “But that made me get to know and love you. It's awful what happened with Layan, but it isn't your fault that she made the wrong decisions or her brother in that matter. And even if you feel guilty about it, it made you save me.”

“I never thought about it like that”, I admitted.

“What do you think about going out and enjoying ourselves a bit? We don't have to if you're too exhausted or not in the mood for it. But I think it might help”, Tasneem suggested.

“I wanna do what makes you happy. Seeing you smile always cheers me up”, I proclaimed.

Ironically my words caused her to smile at me.

“That won't be hard then”, she supposed and pulled me up with her.

--------------------

Next Chapter

This story is ripping my heart out in the best way. I'm feeling so lucky to get to write it. I hope you like it, too.

Btw I somehow turned this oneshot into a series. I've already written chapter 3 as well. I didn't plan it. It just happened. But I'm glad it did.

Tag List: @sunwoniie

#al rawabi school for girls #tasneem x reader #fem reader #lgbtqia #romance #angst #fluff #drama #layan x fem reader #dealing with grief #grieving

13 notes · View notes

hmshermitcraft · 11 months

Note

rose anon! Pearl x Cleo this time

Imagine you're a pair of mischievous twins, Grian and Pearl, and decide to wander through the woods one day. Stray from the path while foraging.

You come across the remains of... something. Maybe a tower, maybe a small part of a much grander structure long, long passed. It's full of statues of people. You explore, naturally. It mostly has sun access, being mostly broken. It's very easy to explore in full, being so small.

Imagine you hear a chorus of hissing.

Pearl hears it, recalls a legend and takes note of the statues, and tackles her brother to cover his eyes with her hat. Hisses at him to shut up when he squawks.

Now imagine you're Cleo, looking on at two people in your ruins. You know what they've assumed, and laugh a bit as you approach, catching the gaze of the younger twin. She goes stockstill.

Pearl gives a nervous hello. "We can leave now if we're bothering you," she adds.

Cleo struggles to explain that she carved the statues herself, and isn't cursed with a stone gaze. They do urge the two to stay while she thinks of how to start, asks them to come back even if they leave in the meantime, and maybe Pearl takes note of the invitation.

The person with the snakes for hair was beautiful, once Pearl realised she didn't have to be afraid of looking at her. The sunlight glinted off the scales and her golden jewellery alike. Green eyes stood out against her paler complexion. Even if she's not the myth Pearl expected, Pearl wouldn't be surprised if she were a myth of some kind. Nothing else could be that dangerously beautiful.

Grian, because of course he does, instantly picks up on her crush. Her brother is nothing but insufferable (she loves him really.) She makes sure to very quickly disregard every single piece of advice he gives her... Not that half of them constitute as advice to begin with.

So, she sneaks away so Grian can't bother her on her mission. What would the snake person like? Flowers, maybe? Pearl doesn't know. So, she takes what Pearl would like. One of her favourite rocks - a piece of opal that's polished to perfection. Everybody loves pretty rocks.

She can hear Grian teasing her already.

It takes her a little while to find that same path, wondering if she should mark it somehow next time. When she looks up at the ruins, she can see the remnants of carvings in stones. Worn with time, cracked and broken. But every bit as intricate as the statues within the walls.

A fellow artist. Pearl can work with that.

Cleo wasn't sure if they expected either of the twins to come back. Most people who wander through here don't. Though, they're not as welcoming to most. People nowadays don't know how to respect history. But, they spot the hoodied figure climbing over collapsed pillars, letting out soft noises as she slides down the other side.

Cleo laughs, striding across the half-tiled floor to greet her. Hopefully, they can make a better impression than last time.

Then Pearl grabs something from her hoodie pocket and thrusts it at them. A shining opal, glittering in the light of the sun. Cleo finds themself lost for words again. So much for that plan.

#hermitshipping #ask #grian tag #pearl tag #zombiecleo tag #pearleo #rose anon #mod 🎀#weekly theme: immortal au

47 notes · View notes

the-starryknight · 2 years

Note

thinking about harry and draco from A Room Up There. would you like to tell us what they’re up to these days? are they happy? 🥺

"We're languishing," Draco sighs dramatically, affecting a depressed pout. "Middle age doesn't suit me."

"Don't be ridiculous," Harry swats him. "He's just in a snit because he found his first grey hair."

"My mother went grey overnight. I'm doomed."

"Your mother was hit by a curse when she was twenty," Harry rolls his eyes. "And besides, I think you'll look very sexy with grey here," he brushes Draco's temple.

The look in his eyes is too sweet, so Draco breaks away, willing the faint flush in his cheeks away. "Ridiculous."

"Tell them about your show," Harry nudges.

"They don't want to hear about that." But it's very obvious Draco wants to talk about it.

"He's lead curator on a show called-- what it is? Belongings?"

"Longing and Belonging," Draco says quietly, meeting Harry's eyes. "Contemporary painting and sculpture, mostly from the gallery's collection, but we have a few loans."

"Draco fought very hard for a pair of Prewett-Bones photomontages from the Tate."

"They're still a bunch of bastards." Draco crosses his arms. "There's been three open positions in the last decade and a half. Three. They won't even give me an interview. But I've made my peace with it, I have."

"Mostly," Harry grins.

"I don't think it's inappropriate to ask Ginevra to cancel her museum membership when they continue to prevent diversity of thought among their curatorial staff."

"Nope," Harry says. "I mean, she didn't even know she still had the subscription but--"

"It's the principle of the thing."

"Absolutely."

"I get the feeling you're making fun of me," Draco frowns, the flush on his cheeks turning worse.

"No," Harry says quickly, touching his hand. "I wouldn't. I think Longing and Belonging is going to be a stunning show. And the Thestraline is doing more exciting work anyway."

"That's the gallery," Draco adds quickly. "Founded about ten years ago because the Tate canceled an exhibition of a series of D-E portraits. Not that— not that I think we should be glorifying that particular part of our past, but the series was really so much more than that, trying to understand why the war happened the way it did. It was... Messy."

"And messy isn't marketable," Harry says with a grim smile.

"So if our cultural institutions won't make space for difficult commentary, we'll just keep making new ones. Even if positions at them aren't quite as prestigious."

Harry laces their fingers together. "I'm proud of you."

"You're a sap is what you are." Harry starts to respond and Draco raises a hand. "Don't even. I don't want to hear whatever ridiculous romantic notion is about to come out of your mouth. Not--" he stumbles, cutting his eyes to the side. "Not in front of them."

"Alright," Harry says, and they share a quiet intimacy played out in indiscernible eye contact. "Alright."

"Potter has a proper job now. Out in front of real people and everything."

"I do," he says proudly. "It's part-time, because I like to work at my own pace."

"He repairs things for an antique shop on Horizont Alley. He's very good. People come back not because he's Harry Potter—and not stare, at least not anymore— but because they know his work is high-quality."

"There's a few of us in the shop. Marcie does charm work, and Vadir does the metals, so I'm not... I'm not alone at it. I'm not singled out."

Draco slips his hand beside Harry's, so their pinkies are touching, so subtly it's easy to miss.

"We've got a kneazle," Harry adds. "Or, two of them."

"They're strays."

"Who we feed and allow to live in the Cottage most of the time."

"They came from the street."

Harry leans forward, grinning mischievously. "He's got to pretend he hates them, but the little one, Flint, falls asleep on his lap most nights and Draco won't ever move him. He's always late to bed because he won't get up."

"I'm afraid of his claws," Draco insists, though he reaches beside his chair to brush gently fingers over Flint's tail. The tiny kneazle purrs and leaps onto Draco's loose shoelace.

"Sure. They're terrifying."

"Horrible. I hate this."

Harry raises one eyebrow, pointedly glancing down at the little cat.

"There is one other thing," Draco muses thoughtfully, abandoning Flint in favor of running his palm over Harry's chin.

"I'm not telling them about the beard."

"You just did, darling. It's very becoming on you."

Harry rolls his eyes. "I lost a bet. And then my razor."

"At the tenth annual Potter's Coming Out Party—"

"You can't call it that!"

"It's been a decade since he told the world he wasn't dead after all," Draco flicks his hand. "So we have an annual do, just friends and family."

"In my defense, George got me drunk."

"And Ginny bet you couldn't beat her in a Quidditch one-on-one. Stupidest bet I've ever seen, she absolutely swept the field with you."

"So now I have to suffer with this," Harry gestures to the growing beard, soft brown and scruffy at his chin.

"While the rest of us benefit immensely." Draco touches him once more, as if savouring the fact that he can. He turns back. "And that's what we've been up to. I think you could say that we're..." He hesitates on the word.

"Yeah," Harry finishes for him. "We're really fucking happy."

A Room Up There (And You In It) | Boldly

#a room up there #asked and answered #this has been in my drafts for a minute #so i am releasing it

191 notes · View notes