#why can't you—an adult—focus as well as in the past?
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im
literally the maddest ive ever been in my entire life i just got bullied on the bus by these 5 loud as fuck cocky teenage cunts who kept opening the window right above my fucking head and spraying passing cars with a water bottle no matter how many times i slammed it shut and told them to stop and then when i finally turned around and said could you please stop i'm literally just trying to get home in peace this one fucking loser asked "ummmm why" so i was like "because it's annoying and everybody would tell you the same thing" and he was like "well if you don't like it you can always leave, there's the door" and i was so genuinely shell-shocked and speechless at the audacity plus i already have a stutter and always get so unbelievably angry during these kinds of interactions that it's literally like life-threatening to me almost so i couldn't even comprehend what he had just said to me but i did manage to humiliate him by being like "how old are you?" (no answer) "how old are you?" (no answer) "fifteen?" and he literally was too visibly embarrassed to say anything and wouldn't give me any other number he just made fun of how "adult" i was but in my stressed out fucking state i kind of forgot to tell him that i literally am an adult bc i didn't want to just compare ages like some kind of cringe idiot so they might live with the assumption that i was either the same age as them or ever so slightly older than them for the rest of their lives bc i do look 16 at most irl which i'm trying to come to terms with currently but anyway i literally just kept my focus on this one asshole right behind me and confronted him in genuinely the most firm but polite manner i could and then immediately as soon as i turn back around the guy sitting next to him goes "uhhhhhh i couldn't understand One single word she said so it's time to continue boys 🤪" and then they started laughing at me + screaming 10 times louder than before + blowing raspberries at me like fucking 3 year olds so i waited for the next stop then got up and sat beside someone else even though i was so happy to get a window seat for the first time in legitimate months and im still so unimaginably fucking angry abt the whole thing i know it doesn't seem like that big of a deal but when ppl make fun of the way i speak or mock me or say they can't understand me it literally makes me want to claw their eyes out and on top of everything else that had happened during the interaction it was just slightly too much for me to handle i didn't want to stoop to their level by cursing them out or being legitimately mean even though they deserved it but i regret not telling them to die as i was walking past them i hope a horrible horrible future awaits their loser hypebeast bully friendgroup i hope they never get girlfriends or accepted into college and i hope someone with less patience than me beats them up for their behavior one day
#this sounds extreme but i speak from experience when i say that nothing in the world is more pathetic or evil to me than teenage boys#mp
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i have a friend with a child on the way who's quitting smoking for their sake after 10+ years—essentially his entire adult life. the decline in literacy, grades, and attention can probably be chalked up to ubiquitous smartphone and ipad use from an early age more than anything else. since children ape what adults around them do, it's incumbent on us to break our own addictions and stop smartphone usage
#and not give them ipads or smartphones#it's all phones i don't think the other factors hold nearly as much explanatory purchase#why can't you—an adult—focus as well as in the past?
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ADULT STORE
↳ GETO すぐる + fem!reader
"Oh, see I told you... this product's a bit intense."
1.5k words
Pt. 2
Summary : product testing with the helpful employee at the adult store!
Warnings : minors do not read/interact : smut/explicit content : using toys, stranger/hookup sex, softdom!Geto, praise, cunnilingus, fingering, dirty talk, squirting, multiple orgasms, sex fantasy trope (sex with the adult store employee)
Note : i haven't made a trip to the adult store in ages bc... everything i want is so expensive lol (the struggle) 😭 i have some rlly funny adult store stories i could ramble about but i will refrain ✋ anyways, indulge yourselves in this fantasy, angels! 😈
Playme : wanna know what it's like?
The gate of the store buzzes, the employee watches you open it with a clink and enter the adult store. Your eyes flood with the overwhelming sight of wall-to-wall toys.
The smooth voice of the employee comes from behind the cash register.
"Yo."
Long hair. Dark, brooding look — almost gothic. Attractive hands with pronounced veins running over the back of them, poised on the countertop which he's lazing over.
He sees you and slowly straightens out his back out to impress you with his height.
"Ah, h-hello..."
He hears you stutter, and assumes it must be your first time in an adult store.
"First time? I mean, in an adult store, that is." he breaks the ice.
"Haha, y-yeah... yeah, it's my first time."
Yeah, that's what I thought.
He holds hard and deep eye contact with you. Yes, he's aware of how intensely he stares. He's doing it on purpose.
"Would you like some assistance, or do you just want to leisurely browse by yourself?"
His tone is so friendly, it doesn't let on to how heated his abdomen is getting at the sight of you.
"Yes, please, I'd appreciate your assistance."
Aw, of course.
"M'kay... then let me assist you."
He smoothly comes out from behind the counter and the two of you stand in front of a wall of toys.
"Overwhelmed?" he chuckles, noting how your eyes widen while looking at all the products. "I know there's a lot to choose from. But just focus on your needs. What do you need?"
"What do I need? Honestly, I have no idea what I need." you laugh nervously.
I know exactly what she needs...
"Well, why don't we carefully go through the products together? I'm sure I can figure out what you need. Promise I know my stuff. I've been working here for three years."
His nonchalance and professionalism puts you at ease. It's something he prides himself on: making customers feel relaxed.
Your eye catches on a pink dildo, so he takes it off the rack to show you up close.
"This one's good, it's got a ribbed design." he shows it off. "Are you looking for just penetration or clitoral stimulation?"
Aw, she's flustered.
"Uh, both I guess? Yeah. I'd love both."
Of course you'd love both. That's what you need, pretty girl.
"Both? Come over here. Let me show you something you might like."
There's a flirty tension between the two of you that just keeps getting more and more... intense.
He plucks a curvy vibrator. It looks expensive. Because it is expensive.
"This one's got ten functions—"
"—ten?! Sounds a bit extra."
"Nothing's too extra when it comes to your personal pleasure."
The two of you share a long look, then laugh.
"But it really is an excellent product."
"Are you advertising?" you joke teasingly.
"Absolutely." he jokes, "Kidding. I'm not trying to come across as a preachy marketer or something. I've used it with partners in the past, that's why I'm recommending it; I know it's good. It's a pretty intense toy. Helps girls squirt even if they think they can't."
I could make her squirt.
He's running his eyes up and down your body.
"Is that so...?" you mumble flirtatiously, eyeing out the product in his veiny, manly hands.
"Hm, still a skeptic? Because I'm sure I could please you."
He hopes that you note his deliberate use of 'I' and not 'it' there.
"Yeah. I'm sure you could please me, too." you flirt.
A heat erupts in his abdomen and stomach.
Oh wow... now she's really flirting, huh? Why'd I wear tight pants today of all days...
He has an unwavering gaze on you. You've captivated him. Put him in some kinda horny trance.
"Did I say me? Sorry. Slip of the tongue." he murmurs, voice dropping lower, "I meant the vibrator." he obviously lies.
You and him exchange a suggestive, longing look. You can feel your pussy clench around nothing, begging to get stuffed up and pleasured.
He hesitates before speaking again, as if he's scared of crossing a line and making you uncomfortable.
"If you want to... we could test it out together?" he suggests. His nonchalance is an act, really he's so nervous when he asks this.
"I'd love to..." you consent, and he doesn't miss the erotic excitement in your tone.
He nods towards the backdoor, eyes keeping on you and your cute little body that he just wants to feel and squeeze like a toy itself.
"Promise to keep your lips sealed about this? I don't wanna get fired for uh... you know... demonstrating products... to my pretty customer."
"Only if you promise to help me squirt for the first time."
Oh wow. Fuck. I'm hard.
His lips widen into a devilish grin. "Sure thing."
After a sloppy, desperate make out with this stranger, you find yourself sat on the couch in the breakroom. Door locked. Blinds shuttered closed. Legs spread wide to his liking, as he cushions the vibrator into your plush slit.
He's rubbing it slowly up and down your folds. He watches your reactions intently, breathing heavier at the sight of your pussy squishing under the pink dildo. The buzzing sound fills the room, but your moans are louder.
He clutches the toy gently, massaging the bulbous head into your clit with sweeping circular motions.
"F-fuck... that pretty clit feels good, doesn't it? Yeah? Let's get it feeling even better."
He turns it up a notch. It buzzes harder against your sensitive nub.
"How's that? Haha, yeah, intense, isn't it?
"Yeahhh — Fuck! Ohhh that's so good, that's so — oh my goddd fuckkk. S-sorry I think... I'm gonna cummm — !!"
"It's okay. Cum as hard as you can, yeah? I want you to get a good idea of how well this toy can pleasure you before you buy it, after all. Oh there we go... just let go and... f-fuck... wow... j-just cum like that. Fuck... that pretty clit feels so good now, huh? Gonna cum? Gonna cum for me, with a vibrator on your cunt?"
He takes note of your reaction to his dirty talk and smirks. Then he slyly turns the toy's setting higher and it buzzes more intensely, and in one... two... three... seconds, you're squirting like crazy all over the pink vibrator and his hand.
Holy shit, look at that pretty pussy gushing... she could drench my dick. I wanna be inside her so fucking baddd...
"Oh, see I told you... this product's a bit intense." he regains his professional tone after you cum.
He turns the toy off and watches you come down from your shaking orgasm, smug look on his face. He keeps it clutched in his veiny hand, and brings it up to his lips to suck and lick up all your juices from it.
She tastes so fucking good... I feel dizzy.
You watch him with wide eyes as he tastes your slick off the toy.
"F-fuck... wh-what did you s-s-say your name was again?" you stutter, starstruck by this stranger.
You're so fucking dizzy, your pussy is buzzing like it still feels the intensity of the toy against it.
"Hm, wanna know my name?" he smiles teasingly, "How about you cum on my face and then I'll tell you."
"Fuck, okay."
And then as soon as you give him permission, he's hungrily diving between your thighs.
"Oh my god..." he loves how you gasp and writhe under the influence of his mouth.
Let's see how fucked-out I can get her. Wanna see her lose her mind 'cause of me.
His lips latch onto your labia and suckle, then onto your clit. He points his tongue at your clit, then oh my god flattens it and laps at your bud while suckling. His softness shows a hint to tenderness in his personality; he really knows how to treat a woman well.
This stranger spoils your pussy with his tongue and lips. He seems to be in his own little world while nosing between your thighs. He carelessly gets your juices smeared across his cheek and lets the rest dribble down his chin.
"Fuck fuck fuck — like that, like that. Don't stop don't stop — !! 'm gonna cum! G-gonna — fffffffucking cummmm ahhhhh — !!"
He flicks the tip of his tongue against your sensitive bundle of nerves, eager to make your pussy freak out on his mouth. Just before you cum he slips two fingers into your hole, middle and ring, and pumps them into a sweet spot hard. He just wants to get an idea of the feeling of your pussy when it cums.
Suckling at your clit, fingering you with nice hard rough strokes, closing his eyes like he's the one enjoying it meanwhile he's silent and you're moaning like you're going insane. He can tell you're close and speeds it up.
"Cum cum cum, cum for me. Just let go and cum." he sounds so desperate, and that professional tone of his is finally cracking. "Cum on my fucking face, please."
And he dives his tongue right back into your hole, wriggling his tongue around, resulting in the nastiest wet squelching sound. His lips press flat against your pussy, he draws in a deep breath and your heat is all he smells.
Please cum on my face. Please please please.
"Ah! Fuck! Fuckkkk!"
You gush right on his lips, which are plump and swollen and red and glistening with your slick.
He pulls away and licks his lips and tells you his name.
"Suguru, by the way. My name's Suguru. Hey... can I give you my number?"
Oh he's so smooth. But he's even smoother at the checkout, when he asks if you're free this Friday for a date. At his apartment. With the company of some of his favorite toys.
© arminsumi
Do not plagiarize / repost / translate / copy layouts / etc.
Do not steal what I've worked hard to create.
#smut#mdni#geto#geto suguru#geto x reader#geto smut#geto suguru smut#geto x reader smut#geto x fem reader#geto x you#geto x y/n#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen x you#jjk geto#suguru x reader#suguru smut#suguru#x reader#female reader#fem reader
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Smile❤️ (Yandere X Loser!Reader)
Micky thought that he couldn't feel love.
Ever since he could remember, Micky couldn't connect with anyone on an emotional level. Even his own family members were like aliens to him, creatures that stretched their lips into strange contortions, ETs that became unreasonable when he wouldn't do the same. As a teenager many girls flirted with him in school, hell, a few guys did as well, but none of their confessions ever stirred any emotion from him, even at the height of his puberty. The smiles of the people around him never felt warm or welcoming. Just, tight. Cheeks pulled back, revealing teeth, expecting him to mirror their action, and Micky couldn't understand why.
Nothing made him smile.
College was further isolating. Group projects seemed to no longer be a thing, (at least in the classes he took) so his interactions with humans slowly became less frequent, making his classmates look more inhuman and monstrous.
Until someone in his college was doxxed for being a creep. It was interesting, watching how quickly people turned on their friend, forcing him into an outcast because someone online revealed his private post history.
An annoying young woman in his language arts class gathered people around Micky's seat to talk about what had happened. Micky wouldn't have searched up the drama on his own time, but he didn't see the point in pushing everyone away.
"This user on Xforums, anonymousXnightmare is the one who doxxed Nathan."
AnonymousXnightmare? How fucking lame.
"That's a lame username..."
"Maybe it's a kid..?"
Micky did his best to ignore them, but the username kept popping up in conversation throughout campus. It was getting a little annoying. Some people were mocking the name, while others were praising the "internet hero". It started interfering with his ability to focus in his classes.
But the gossip cooled down after a week, and life began to run as normal, until another student had their life ruined. A football player, they didn't post anything incriminating or disturbing. It was anonymousXnightmare who posted their own collected evidence. Pictures taken from afar of the player with his highschool sweetheart, as in sweetheart who was still in highschool. Recordings of the two of them. Months of stalking all compiled by the stranger.
Again, Micky was bombarded by chatter, excitable young adults losing their minds over the situation. It was... irritating.
Back in his dorm room, Micky was scrolling through Xforums, the most popular forum used by students in his university, made by students for students, searching for the loser with the lame username. Scrolling past the photos he had heard about, he found a post stating
"Dear Allen Brackens, if you cannot stop blasting your shitty music in the halls on your shitty speakers, I WILL ruin your life!"
and Micky had to lean back, to just take in what he had read. That must have been the name of the football player. What he was doing was genuinely gross, and should have been exposed by someone. But did this poster really stalk them for what looked like months just because he listened to music they didn't like?
It was so dumb.
He scrolled down farther into the mystery poster's history, to the first man they doxxed.
"Dear Nathan McAllister, we all know you're a two faced little bitch. Either stop littering the campus with your Jesus pamphlets, or else..."
Micky, for the first time in his life, was amused. The whole situation was so stupid. They really ruined their fellow students lives, just because they annoyed them?
He made an account just to follow his mystery poster, not sure yet why he was interested to see what they would post next.
Less than two days later, and Micky's phone notified him of another post.
"Dear Samantha Rudbeckia, your obnoxious laughter is driving me insane. Can't you see how annoying you are? Knock it off."
That was it?! That was enough to set you off? Laughter? Micky paused mid step, still staring down at his phone. Something felt off about his face. It hurt.
It was pretty easy to find anonymousXnightmare in his school. Micky picked up a map of the university, and mapped out the paths of the three people targeted. They ran into a lot of different students throughout their day. But they only ran into a couple of people who openly seemed to hate them, and only one of those people was a student named (Reader). (Reader), who constantly appeared as though they would collapse at any moment, the hollows under their eyes so dark they looked sickly. (Reader), who despite being borderline anemic, was very sneaky, and very good and being unnoticeable despite their extreme appearance. Unfortunately for them, they had someone watching them as closely as they watched their victims bullies. Micky watched as they stealthily snapped photos of students from around corners, how they seemed to blend into the background and nobody noticed them hiding in waiting.
Micky felt ashamed for ever thinking you were lame. You were.. cute.
The way you crouched like a bug, hunched over like a roly poly scared of being picked up. The way you bit your dry lips in anger to the point they bled.
Micky's face hurt more and more. Every time he saw (Reader) a pain he had never felt before would strain at his cheeks, and his face would feel hot all over. It wasn't until he caught a glimpse of himself in his reflection in a window that Micky realized he was smiling. He never knew that smiling hurt. But he couldn't stop it.
Pictures and videos of Samantha and her married professor were posted online, and Micky was excited to know what (Reader's) face would look like when they reaped the fruits of their labor. But when he snuck into their classroom, zooming in on their exhausted face with his phone's camera, he felt a new emotion seeing that (Reader) was just as annoyed as they always were. A hard pit fell from his ribs into his lower stomach. He was disappointed.
Why aren't you happy? You won. You should be rejoicing right now.
He felt conflicted and confused. Like an octopus was throwing a tantrum in his abdomen, squirming uncomfortably. And it ruined his day. Micky couldn't focus on any of his classes, and the rest of his day was like a foggy dream. What was it about (Reader) that attracted him to them so much?
A cute young woman with smooth black hair approached Micky, a dark blush complimenting her picture perfect face.
"Um, excuse me? Excuse me? Excuse me?"
Micky snapped out of his thoughts, turning his gaze down towards the beautiful person. Her rosey lips were slightly upturned in a posed way.
She's smiling.
Micky internally verbalized it. The same way he did whenever he saw anyone smiling. It never looked good. Smiling was so awkward, and strange. People loved seeing others smiling, and smiled when they were happy, but it always reminded Micky of how not one of them he was.
"Hi! My name is Maggie."
I don't care.
"We have econ together?"
"Okay."
Why was seeing her smile make her look fake, inhuman, alien? Just like everyone else. Then why was Micky so let down seeing (Reader's) lukewarm reaction to their victory?
"I was wondering, I mean, (laughs), a group of us are going out for drinks later, and we, I was wondering if you wanted to come with us.."
She giggled nervously, fiddling her fingers and biting her lip. The image of (Reader) practically eating their lower lip was triggered like a trap. This woman, whose name wasn't worth remembering, made Micky feel nothing. The uncanny feeling of speaking with a living mannequin or an advanced AI. Her movements weren't natural, her smile was just a contraction of muscles. Then, like an epiphany, Micky realized all at once what made (Reader) so special.
Maybe, it wasn't that everyone else was alien, but Micky. Micky was the only one who never fit in. The only one who didn't feel emotions or connect with others like everyone else could. And there was a bug walking around in human clothes, barely staying awake in class and casually ruining peoples' lives simply because they annoyed them. (Reader) wasn't a human either, just like Micky. That's why they didn't seem happy with their victory. Why would a human bring them joy?
Micky's lips pulled tight, smiling brightly at the young woman before walking away without saying a word.
You're the first person to make me feel, because you're just like me. Right, (Reader)? If no one but you can make me feel, then no one but me should be able to make you smile!
:::::::::::::::::::::::::
(Reader) slouched over their laptop, their messy hair pulled back in a top bun just to keep their untrimmed bangs out of their eyes in the privacy of their dorm, eating another cup of noodle while reading all of their "fan mail". Samantha wasn't getting kicked out like they had hoped, but Professor what's-his-nuts did get canned, so hopefully when Samantha comes back to class she'll be too busy sobbing "woe is me" to find anything funny.
Ba-ding♪
A private message popped up from an account with an automated username.
(Reader) snorted so hard a noodle went up into their sinuses.
user01793664544001: I know who you are <3
"Ah-ow! God damn!"
anonymousXnightmare: Who the fuck is this?
user01793664544001: ur prince charming <3
anonymousXnightmare: Don't fuck with me
user01793664544001: come find me
"Watch me, bitch."
Looking up IP addresses is a lot easier than people make it seem. It doesn't take a genius hacker to doxx someone. Of course, (Reader) goes above and beyond, often following assholes for months to collect evidence of their douche baggery. (Reader) got an address in less time than it took to finish their noodles, and took down their hair, quickly setting out to start getting information on their newest "bully".
The address took them to another dorm across campus. How dumb are they? (Reader) faux chuckled, feeling superior to this newest dick. No one was quite as smart as them.
As they crept through the building, no one payed them any attention as they began taking notes on the residents. It had to be one of these losers.
They didn't have a chance to fight back, as they passed one of the rooms the door opened and pulled them inside faster than they had a chance to scream. The man who abducted (Reader) wrestled them to the floor, panting heavily.
(Reader) glared up at the handsome stranger, smiling down at them in a creepy way, his cheeks twitching like he had never smiled before, like his face hurt from the small action. His face was pink and he was sweating, panting with a feverish moisture glazing his eyes.
"Aren't you happy? You found me~"
"G-Get off of me, you pervert!" (Reader) attempted to kick the kidnapper off of them.
This wasn't the answer he was looking for. His smile fell briefly before bouncing back.
"You're just upset because you don't know me yet. Don't worry, it took me a while to realize you and I were the same species as well, so don't worry. I'll wait, I'll wait for you to realize you love me too..."
He rambled quickly, pressing harder against (Reader's) body. A strange noise squeaked out of his throat as he seemed startled, (Reader) feeling a bulge form against their upper thigh.
"Ah, I'll wait.. I'll wait for you to love me too.. but I need you to do something for me while I wait.."
Micky stuck his fingers in (Reader's) mouth, pulling their dry lips out till they bled across his skin.
"Smile for me..."
#yandere x reader#yandere oc#yandere x darling#yandere#pathetic loser#loser reader#tw stalking#bully reader#yandere fanfiction#gender neutral reader#romance#not proofread
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Sebastian Sallow Headcanons (revisited)
I made a similar post a while back, but I think it's time to revisit it.
Sebastian Sallow is a Scorpio (born between Oct 23 and Nov 22).
Typical Scorpio traits include being resourceful, ambitious, brave, (com)passionate, possessive, jealous, loyal, supportive, emotional, intense. I’d say he is all that. Also fits the Slytherin characteristics.
I don't have a particular date in mind for him anymore, but I'd say around Halloween or after would suit him and Anne. (I haven't looked at the actual Astrology aspect of it, leaving that to the experts here!)
He is a nerd and an athlete.
He is the kind of nerd who will hit you with knowledge when you least expect it and never as the know-it-all type, but rather the let-me-share-my-knowledge type. I'm sure he'll be actually fun at parties.
And I see no problem in him being hunched over books for hours on end and being physically fit at the same time. (Yes, he seemed a little unfit at the start of fifth year, being all breathless on the way to Hogsmeade and during a mission up some stairs, but I'll ignore that. He'll grow into it.)
So he's not only fit enough to brave all those stairs in Hogwarts, I also see him on the Quidditch team. I initially had him as a Beater in my head, and I still stand by it, but I do see him as a Seeker as well now, just because how he can show off by catching the Snitch.
(I don't see him as a Chaser, too average a position for him imo, or a Keeper, I think he'd be too hyper to stay in one place all the time, even though his protective trait might play into it, but he can focus on that more when he hits some Bludgers around.)
He is tall.
I also HC that Ominis is taller, but Sebastian is still tall. I put him at 1.80m/180cm (5′11″) initially, but I might even put him taller now. He'll definitely have another growth spurt during his last years at Hogwarts and grow into an even taller adult, so for now, let's settle on him being 1.85m/185cm/6'1" at the end of the game. (Angst can make you grow, yes.)
(And I need him to be tall because my MCs usually are quite short and I just love that size difference dynamic so much!)
He is an extrovert.
He might have his baggage to carry during his fifth year (and beyond), but he still has many extrovert tendencies, especially needing people around to recharge - even if it's just one person (our MC preferably). He is a twin, so being alone was never really an option before Anne got sick.
That's why he hates being alone, he'll certainly have his mind flooded with doubts and dark thoughts if he happens to be alone. That might make him clingy and/or overprotective towards his significant other/friends, but if it helps him sleep at night, he won't hesitate to hog those special people to his advantage.
He is a light sleeper.
And probably has nightmares more than your average boy considering all the stress he puts himself under, with his worries for Anne and the constant abuse from Solomon and his general past (loss of his parents, etc.).
Yet even though he might have trouble falling asleep and sleeping in general, I do think he can sleep anywhere, thinking about the shed in Feldcroft that the fandom considers to be his place to stay when he visits his sister. Also as a twin he was probably used to sharing small spaces and finding sleep wherever he can.
He can't sit still for long.
Call it ADHD, restless legs syndrome or general nerves, he probably can't sit still and has to fidget a lot as well. Might conflict with his ability to absorb himself in books for hours on end, but even when reading, I'd imagine him moving a lot (think back to him pacing in front of the fireplace in the Slytherin common room, or his constant walking cycle through the DADA tower, etc.).
His favorite color is green.
Obvious choice, I just needed something to end this with. So here we go. Green for Slytherin, for nature, and maybe, probably hope? Who knows.
[ 🔞 NSFW Sebastian Sallow Headcanons ]
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Could I perhaps request Kung Lao (mk11) when the time merger happens he learns of his child from that future could it be a one shot with prompt :
63.) "You're my everything!"
Btw Have an amazing day :)
I tried to see what I could do with this! Wasn't that bad yandere-wise compared to what I usually write, hope you still like it! I didn't have much to go off of.... I was also rusty on MK11's plot so this is pretty much mostly spoiler free.
Yandere! Platonic! Kung Lao Prompt 63
Pairing: Platonic
Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Overprotective behavior, Murder, Blood, Darling doesn't mind his lapse in judgement, Possible OOC Kung Lao, Darling just wants a father and accepts him, This could lead into a future fic but I'm out of ideas rn, Dubious companionship.
Kung Lao never thought he'd have a kid. That was the last thing he thought he'd see when the time merge happened. Yet here he is, his past self, meeting his future kid.
You too were confused. You never entirely met your dad before he became a revenant, only a few times. As a result, your encounters with him were only ever with the revenant form of your father.
While Kung Lao was shocked at the fact he even had a kid somewhere down the line, you're shocked at meeting your father alive. You didn't expect your father to be so… Arrogant at first. However, you didn't entirely blame him due to your bloodline.
Kung Lao was unsure how to warm up to you when he met you. He noted the fighting techniques you naturally shared with him and saw how well you've trained. Kung Lao actually… Pities you a bit considering his present counterpart's fate.
Due to the existence of his present counterpart and you, Kung Lao actually drops his arrogance. Instead he wants to focus on learning about you while fighting beside you. You deserve a good future, don't you?
While the events of Kronika's plan develops, you end up spending time getting to know Kung Lao and Liu Kang. You barely knew the two growing up but feel at ease with their younger counterparts. You feel a bit of resentment that you never got to have moments like this until now.
Liu Kang teases you and Kung Lao as you talk with one another. Usually it's something along the lines of how soft Kung Lao is with you instead of his usual arrogance. Kung Lao tries to brush him off, simply saying he's learned to appreciate other things than winning and proving himself.
Why does he have to prove himself when he has you right here?
It seems as though anything he talks about captivates you at times. The idea of that makes him a bit sad. You must've had a hard life, huh?
Kung Lao has a hard time denying the fact he's attached to you. He understands he doesn't belong in this timeline but he can't bring himself to just leave you alone. Is he really just supposed to leave you to the revenant version of himself?
No… He doesn't want that. He doesn't think you do either.
As time passes Kung Lao finds himself unable to let you go. You'd be so alone without him, right? Clearly… He has to do something, right?
Kung Lao ignored the fact you were a mature adult. He still thought of you as a kid, his kid, that he's meant to protect. So for you… He'll make an exception to the pacifist rule.
You've been told your father was a reckless pacifist at heart. Which is why when Kung Lao returned to you after an attack… Covered in blood… You felt a pang of fear in your heart. This… This was still your father, right?
Kung Lao ignored your changed mindset towards him. Even when you asked why he changed his ways so suddenly afterwards… He gave you an eerily calm smile. One on any other bloodthirsty warrior would make sense… But not your father.
“I've learned sometimes more lethal violence is necessary to protect what you fight for…” Kung Lao hums, quickly pulling you into a hug. You remain stunned in his arms… It's the welcoming hug a parent would give… But felt wrong here. “Was I supposed to just let you get hurt?”
You pause your fear and think on his words. Kung Lao, even when he wasn't your Kung Lao, killed to protect you. You meant that much to him… The thought soon begins to soothe you more than scare you.
“You're my everything.” Kung Lao mumbles while holding you. This felt… Natural. This felt like it was meant to be. Why were you denied this before?
You felt the same, checking to make sure you were in private before huddling closer despite the blood.
Part of you yearned for this…
Even if you were unaware of the dark changes you stirred within this past version of your father.
#yandere mortal kombat#yandere mortal kombat 11#yandere kung lao#platonic yandere#yandere platonic kung lao
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The reason why I can't behind any of the characters or things they do is that they're made into hypocrites.
You got Mina and Eijirou who're against bullies yet are friends with Bakugou don't do anything when he gets onto All Might.
Hawks who had a past with an abusive father and when Endeavor is exposed as one, he doesn't react or say anything about it.
Izuku with his quirkless past yet doesn't offer any sympathy towards those like him, like how he tried to make Nighteye laugh or Aoyama.
And then there's Aizawa... the guy's a walking hypocrite so I don't feel like going into any of the things he did.
All this makes it difficult to really get behind and like these characters when they contradict their characteristics this much all to make the worse characters look good.
Hi @theloganator101 👋,
Exactly this. Hori's characters act how HE wants them to to service the plot rather than what would fit their characters. So we have situations like this where they become hypocrites and bad things are implied about them. We have talked about Aizawa before so I'll focus on Izuku, Kirishima, Mina and Hawks.
Izuku - was quirkless, was horrifically abused by Bakugou for this as well as daring to try to help him out a river once.
Also Izuku - is NOT allowed once to reflect on the similarities between Aoyama and himself. Is NOT allowed to think one bit on his quirkless past or the horrific bullying (abuse) he went through. Does not seek to change the status quo now that he is a part of it. Or think about how HE could change how quirkless are being treated. This in my most charitable interpretation could be Izuku's self hatred coming out full force, he doesn't want to think about when he was quirkless so he doesn't. But this could also be construed as arrogance, stupidity and narrow minded-ness.
Izuku - knows in graphic detail the Todofam situation, is best friends with Todoroki Shoto and confronted Endeav for being a POS when he first met him.
Also Izuku - Acts like a fanboy of Endeavor in the agency arc and defends Endeavor to Dabi's face (another of Endeavor's victims.) - This puts a sour taste in my mouth not going to lie, this reads as Izuku thinking, 'because he's nice to me and he says he's going to change all is good now!' Also (unlike defending Shoto) defending Endeav just isn't necessary here. No one is denying Endeavor's mentorship or heroism skills. Dabi is saying he is an abuser and a shit dad which - you know - he is. Izuku reads as a naive, narrow-minded teenager at best here. There are better ways Hori could have worded Izuku stepping in - this wasn't it.
Mina and Kirishima: 'We hate bullies!' 😠 Very vocally anti bully, their heroism stories each center on it.
Also Mina and Kirishima: look on as Bakugou acts like the BIGGEST bully for all of the academic year and decide to become his besties. - This can be read as them being too thick to work out Bakugou is a bully at best. At worst... They read as cowards and hypocrites. The 'It's ok as long as he's not picking on me or my friends,' type.
Hawks: has an abusive father that was taken into custody by Endeav before being taken by the HPSC and enduring more intense training (likely abuse.)
Also Hawks: Despite his past abuse as an adult licks the boots of another abusive father, Endeav (Endeav's boots must be super shiny.) - Are we still pretending Hawks is an actual character at this point? All he is now is an Endeav Simp with some 'I killed Twice' angst sprinkled in. But I will save the major pieces of salt regarding Hawks for the ask I have about him. Least charitable interpretation - Hawks has LOW empathy thanks to his abusive childhood and latches on hard to a select few (Endeav) who he will protect, screw everyone else. Hawks doesn't care about Endeav's past child abuse, spousal abuse and literal crimes just what he means to him. Most Charitable - Hawks is an abused messed up person who never grew up past his idealisation of Endeav and clung to anything that meant he could keep the 'hero Endeav' in his mind intact.
With all of these deductions in mind, characters we are meant to root for feel flat, hypocritical, OOC and just downright bizarre at times.
Why? Because Hori bends characters to his script rather than writing the script for what works for the characters.
#mha critical#Bnha critical#Anti Ashido Mina#Anti Kirishima Ejiro#Midoriya Izuku critical#Anti Hawks#Sorry but it had to be said#The writing is to blame#Anti Bakugou#Anti Bakugou Katsuki#Anti Endeavor
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Heizou and the Dad He'd Like to Fuck
Your neighbor Heizou decides to pay you a visit
FTM!Heizou x Top!Male Reader
Warnings: Non-Con Somnophilia, Oral, Creampie, Age Gap (Reader Age Unspecified), Daddy Kink
Words: 1,323
"Oh, Heizou? What brings you here?" You open the door to your neighbor. He was wearing a very cute outfit, a loose white tank top and brown booty shorts. If you looked at him from the side, you could see a part of his tits. He apparently wasn't the type to wear bras.
"I know you're alone during the day so I wanted to give you some company! I made you something...it's my own special recipe," Heizou smiles and shows you the dish he made. "I call it The Only Truth."
"It looks great, I appreciate that you're thinking of me Heizou. Come in." You step out of the doorway, allowing Heizou to come in. You lead him to the table and go into the kitchen to look for the right utensils to eat it.
"How have you been?" You ask, sitting across from Heizou.
"I've been great! I'm actually the top of my class." Heizou grins smugly.
"Congrats!" You clap. "I can't wait til my kids get to college." You sigh happily.
"Thanks, I wonder what major they'll choose." Heizou smiles at your expression.
"This is amazing, Heizou! You're a great cook!" You praise him. "That's a good skill to have y'know? Especially when you get married, you gotta pull your weight."
"Y- yeah. Thank you.." Heizou blushes.
"I'm not the greatest cook myself, my husband is the one who cooks here. I make up for it with my job though." You laugh. You didn't work everyday but you got paid very well.
Heizou smiles.
The two of you continue talking and end up watching TV on the couch. You got yourself a few cans of beer, it was very early for you to be drinking but you were feeling stressed.
"(Name), is everything okay?" Heizou asks.
"Yeah....no..." You shook your head.
"What's wrong?"
"I don't wanna bother you with it. You're only 19, you don't wanna hear an old man like me vent."
"I do, just tell me." Heizou insists.
"Alright..." You sigh.
"Me and my husband haven't been getting along lately. We're really only together for the kids. I want a divorce but it would hurt our kids. My husband sleeps in the guest room now." You take a big sip of your drink. "I know it's bad to stay together with the kids but the both of us have traits our kids can't live without. He cooks and I work. His job doesn't pay enough to properly support the kids."
"I see.." Heizou hides a smile. "If you were to get a divorce, would you have full custody?"
"I'd want to but they'd have to eat my shitty cooking everyday." You laugh.
"I could cook for them."
"You're a college student, you should focus on that instead. Not somebody else's kids."
"If I lived here though...I live alone so it'd be nice to be around a family."
"Why would you want to?"
"Because I like you." Heizou leans towards you.
You look at him in shock. I mean, sure you had a few passing sinful thoughts about Heizou but you never wanted to indulge in them. The age gap kept you away.
"Heizou-"
"I know we haven't known each other long but I really do like you." Heizou goes in to kiss you, locking your lips together.
And maybe it was because you were feeling upset and had 2 cans of beer, but you found yourself kissing him back.
Heizou moves his hand past your thigh, palming your crotch.
"Mm- Hey-" You put your hand on his wrist.
Heizou frowns. "Why?"
"Kissing is where I draw the line, okay? You're just too young." You move his hand away.
"I'm an adult! I live alone, how am I too young?" Heizou huffs.
"Maybe in a few years but I just can't date a 19 year old. It's not right."
"How? I don't understand...This is perfectly legal!"
"It's not right to me, I'm sorry. I think you should go home." You stand up.
Heizou sighs and reluctantly leaves the house, not without secretly swiping the extra key though.
──────────────────
*Both of you are whispering i just dont wanna italicize all of it sorry*
Heizou sneaks into your house late at night, knowing you'd be there asleep. He knows all too well how illegal his entire plan is but he doesn't care. It's not like he's going to murder you.
He creeps into your room and quietly makes his way onto your bed. He thanks the Archons for your bad marriage.
He pulls down your pants and underwear, freeing your soft dick. He spits on his hand and jerks you off to full size, he was practically drooling at the sight.
He licks the tip of your dick, taking in the taste and smell of your pre cum, before he sucks you off.
You weren't too heavy of a sleeper so you eventually woke up to Heizou's head bobbing up and down on your dick.
"What the-" Your words are cut off by a low moan forcing its way out of your mouth.
Heizou reluctantly removes his mouth from your dick and looks up at you. "You're awake.."
Yeah, and incredibly horny. You had an erection that needed to be taken care of and you were so damn worked up and tired you decided to use Heizou to do it.
You pulled Heizou up and pinned him down on the bed. You took his shorts off with ease. The dim light that shone from the curtains revealed Heizou's ecstatic expression.
"Yes!" Heizou pulls his shirt off then his underwear. He was dripping wet, he even had slick on the inner part of his thighs.
"You're a whore, you know that?" You line your dick up to his hole.
"I'm a whore!" Heizou nods. "Please fuck this slutty little whore daddy!"
You were glad your kids never called you that.
"Don't you dare complain, got it?" You started to ease yourself into him.
"Mm- yes daddy~" Heizou nods, biting his lip to hold back his moans.
"Fuck- you're tight." You groan, stopping and giving Heizou time to adjust.
"Move, please."
"'S gonna hurt."
"Please daddy." Heizou pouts. "I won't complain at all."
"Fuck. Fine." You grip onto his waist, thrusting into him like there's no tomorrow. Heizou covers his mouth, his small tits moving along with your thrusts. You regretted rejecting him earlier.
"Mmph~!"
You hated that you couldn't hear his moans but there was no way in hell you were going to stop and change locations.
"You're doing so good." You groan. "Just like that, taking me so well."
Heizou bites his hand, holding back a loud moan.
"You're so much fucking better than my husband." You praise Heizou. "He rarely had sex with me. You're so perfect compared to him..."
He bites harder, he's so happy but he has to be quiet.
"I could make you into my wife. You'd like that, wouldn't you?" Your hand trails up to Heizou's chest, your thumb circling his nipple.
Heizou nods his head rapidly.
"I'd fuck you all the damn time." You lean into his ear. "You'd be my little bitch."
"D- da~ daddy~" Heizou manages to speak quietly. "Cu- cu-" He covers his mouth again as he feels his orgasm quickly approaching.
"Slut." That one word is enough to have Heizou's back arching as he has the most intense orgasm he's ever had. He squirts all over the two of you.
"Fuck-" You feel your own orgasm coming after witnessing that. "I'm close."
Heizou wraps his legs around you, making sure you don't go anywhere.
"You want me to- fuck-" You couldn't hold it in anymore, you shoot your load into him.
"Mm~" Heizou removes his hands and grins.
You pull out and flip Heizou over, lifting his ass up and watching as your cum drips down onto your bed. You'll clean the sheets in the morning.
"Daddy?" Heizou looks back at you, confused.
"What? You thought that was it?" You smirk. "I'm gonna pound you til the sun comes up."
#wicks🕯works#heizou smut#heizou x male reader#genshin heizou#genshin shikanoin#shikanoin heizou#genshin impact#genshin smut#genshin impact smut#genshin x reader#top male reader#male reader#wicks🕯reposts#🕯heizou#🕯️heizou#🕯️Genshin
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More Willel Mirroring: Textual vs. Subtextual Abuse
So not only do Will and El's mirrored storylines reveal ideas about sexuality, but they also present an interesting narrative about the different facets of child abuse.
Also, for this post I think I want to just want to focus on season one. There is absolutely subtext for abuse across the other seasons, but since the first season was written to hold on its own, it does create an interesting self contained story about child abuse.
TW for discussion of child abuse
This time around I am probably going to be focusing on Will more than El, because Will's abuse lies more in subtext whereas El lies more on the surface. And there are layers of metaphor and subtext for both instances, which I touch on in my sexuality longpost, although it is much easier to point to El's story and say "she is being abused." After all, this is what happens in the show as well.
The age and lived experiences of the characters does impact their perception, however.
An adult like Benny is able to look at El and understand that she's likely been abused, but young boys like the party who don't know any better think she's crazy. Regardless, it's obvious with El, a little girl with a shaved head who doesn't say much with no sense of privacy that something is wrong with her.
I think that Will and El's storylines are meant to represent invisible versus visible abuse, thus El's abuse is textual while Will's abuse storyline is subtextual. With El, it's hard for her to hide her abuse. As for Will, it's much more concealed. In Jonathan's words—
"He's good at hiding."
The inclusion of this line is part of what points towards Will's abuse. It postulates a couple of questions— why is Will good at hiding and what was he hiding from? Furthermore, I think this line plays into the idea of Will's abuse being hidden. You can't tell just by looking at him that he's been abused, at least from what we see of him in the show. And when you look at his story from a surface level, you may not catch on to this.
Gleaning subtext from Will's flashbacks
El and Will are the two characters that we get flashbacks for, and for both we see what their differing home lives are like. El is being treated like a weapon in the lab by Papa, and Will shares some wholesome moments with Joyce and Jonathan.
Because Will is not presently on screen for much of season one, so a lot of his characterization has to be delivered through flashbacks. Within these flashbacks, there is a lot that can be gleaned from just below the surface that points toward Will being abused.
Lonnie may not be on screen for any of these flashbacks. But if you look closely, his presence is definitely felt.
Flashback #1) Castle Byers
First off, Castle Byers itself— the fact that it exists, and the fact that it's so far away from the Byers' house.
We aren't given an exact location for Castle Byers, other than it's in the woods behind their house. But it's not in their backyard, that's for sure. We also get a comment about Castle Byers from Jonathan later in the season, stating that it's his hiding spot. Why would Will need a safe space and hiding spot outside of his home?
Furthermore, Castle Byers is password protected, with a big sign in the front that reads ALL FRIENDS WELCOME in big letters. Is it not hard for one to infer that Castle Byers is meant to keep something out? Something not a friend?
More from this flashback, we know that Will used to be scared often to the point of having nightmares for a week.
"Anymore" implying that he did used to get scared in the past tense. Had Will just said "I don't get scared like that." it would have a different meaning. The "anymore" is an important inclusion. Will used to be very scared of something when he was younger, but not anymore.
Flashback #2) Should I Stay or Should I Go
The second flashback mentions Lonnie more explicitly, when we hear Joyce arguing with him over the phone over not showing for visitation. Perhaps the mention of him here is meant to subconsciously tie him to the other flashbacks?
This flashback also provides heavy subtext surrounding Will's sexuality, using this line from Jonathan.
I think it’s very likely that Lonnie was abusing Will because of his sexuality. We already have confirmation that he was verbally bullying him for it from Joyce.
Flashback #3) Will the Wise
Will the Wise was introduced in the first scene of the show, but this moment shows that Will the Wise is more than just a DnD character to Will. He’s something he goes to in search of comfort.
In this moment where Will is drawing him, we see that Will seems a little somber. Drawing can be fun, but it’s also a tool that Will can use to express his emotions, both good and bad. More specifically, Will the Wise is fighting bad guys.
Could these bad guys just be referring to Troy and his gang? Or someone else?
The thing about all three of these flashbacks is that they sneakily hide their subtext behind more pertinent pieces of information.
We are introduced to Castle Byers which becomes an important set piece. We are also shown that Will has a safe space outside of his home and used to get nightmares.
We are introduced to Jonathan’s distaste of Lonnie and also given clues about Will’s sexuality.
Will’s drawing becomes a plot point later (used to discern El from Will) but we are also shown that Will’s has a persona which he uses to fight “bad guys.”
The Upside Down as Subtext
Here's the main point I wanna make that took too long to get to, the Upside Down is used to deliver subtext about Will's past abuse.
But isn't Will being actually being tormented by Vecna in the Upside Down? Well I think it's both. Yes Will is literally being hunted by Vecna, and at the same time it's metaphorical for Will's abuse by Lonnie. Some things have a dual-purpose.
We know that the Upside Down is a dark mirror of Hawkins. For most of his time there, at least from what we see, he stays in or around his home.
Will is, quite literally, in danger inside of his own home.
Here.
R-I-G-H-T H-E-R-E. Right here.
My most solid piece of evidence that backs this is this moment where Will tells Joyce "Mom, it's coming!" and the following Byers House scene we see is Lonnie pulling up to the house.
Additionally, we do not see any attempts from Will to contact Joyce while Lonnie is there, along with Lonnie hammering over the hole in the wall and taking down the lights he was using to communicate. Lonnie's presence literally silences him.
Does Joyce know?
Joyce's comments in the sheriff's office suggests that she is aware of Lonnie's homophobic bullying, I think that just like the Upside Down, the extent of Lonnie's abuse is something that she doesn't fully understand. But she does want to.
Understanding does require communication from Will. And unfortunately for Joyce—
—he's good at hiding.
Evidence from future seasons does lead me to believe that Will forgot some of these traumatic memories, although if I were looking at season one on it's own, I would say that Will is hiding his past abuse.
If anything, Will was likely hiding this abuse as it was happening.
#shorter than a usual longpost cause ive touched on some similar points in other posts and felt like i needed less to get my main point acros#willel#will byers#el hopper#lonnie byers#tw lonnie byers#tw child abuse#longpost#ik that this is mostly stuff ive said before but listen. the will byers hyperfixation never dies.#i cant rest until ive covered every single little part of his life. okay
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so, what's up with korvin's parents?
they're just normal people. they just have their circumstances and korvin doesn't want people putting their ignorant opinions on them.
=
but what's really up with korvin's parents? (+ a deeper discussion on my other fics, why the SI MCs are the way they are)
Getting Real™️ warning: reading this might provide context that turns you off my fics.
if you want to keep enjoying light-hearted snark as it is, don't read. if you read this, i request you do not come to me to argue a contrary interpretation of my writing. i know where my brain worms come from, please and thank you.
===
They are stated to be undocumented persons in chapter 1. They intentionally abandoned Korvin in the US. Korvin's reaction is he does not want anyone's judgment on the situation, because chances are it will be 'well-intentioned' but without context, kinda racist and classist, and he's an adult in a kid's body. He gets the kind of pressure that he, as a 'weird kid', as who should be his parents' first-born son to make it in America, would put on his parents. There are no other relatives here to help. They are too poor to be careful parents and do more than financially support their child, just barely. Mental health and superstition are greatly tied in Chinese culture, so he also squicks them with his 'unnaturalness'.
Their choice to leave him in the US is a far-shot hope that while they can't support their kid properly, he'd at least be to stay as a Dreamer and somehow make it.
And how do you begin to explain all that to someone? And better yet, how do you control the gut clenching reaction to someone's judgment of your situation when there was no good choice? What if someone accuses you and your parents of taking advantage of the US legal system, as if you're cockroaches that don't 'deserve' where you are right now?
It's better to never leave an opening for someone to judge. Or if someone has to say something, you just smile and nod, because you usually can't afford to say anything back to them.
I don't make this blatant in the fic because that's 1) insensitive 2) I don't want to deal with people's ACTUAL ignorant opinions 3) it's kinda meta and ingrained for me to be circumspect about this stuff, even if it makes up an essential part of Korvin.
===
It's cosmic comedy, I think, that I'm doing an application that needs me to submit a statement on my academic interests and diversity within my professional career. What is my past experience with that? What is my future intent? How has this impacted my goal to join academia?
I'm almost 30. And growing up somewhere metropolitan, moving all over the country, interacting with people of many walks of life and knowing there are many more I don't interact with...I've been through a roller coaster of perspectives what makes a person distinct. Their distinctness isn't just personality, even if personality isn't so flimsy that a different day will change someone so completely. Yet, we're all shaped by where we come from. Our background, culture, class, sex, environment, etc.
This might be rather obvious, but over the years I've read fic I find that it's a quality and philosophy that doesn't come across often. I'll focus just on SI and OC-insert fics since that's the most relevant. Perhaps it's the type of fics I read, perhaps it's the fandoms, perhaps it's the demographic, perhaps we have too much practice in accepting some Everybody who is Everybody as a baseline regardless of how well that Everyone resonates with us personally.
Of course, not every fic is written for every audience. And different people will always have different perspectives. But I want you to ponder these metrics: I've read fanfic since 2003. Non-stop. I would average 20-50k words a week as a preteen, and ramped up from there. SI and OC make a big portion of what I engage with because I find it a fascinating examination of canon material using an external force, or something like that. They also have the potential to be deeply developed super quickly because we, as amateur authors, really can't help putting a lot of ourselves without filter into our creations. It can lead to polarizing feelings over them because of that.
It's been twenty years, and I can count on one hand the number of SI and OC fics where I legitimately felt that I understood where this character came from and they make sense to me. The rest...some I understood where they came from in the same way I need to empathize with the people around me so that I don't offend them. As a kid and teen, that meant ostracization and bullying. As a professional, it means missing opportunities, also getting bullied, being sabotaged, being used and tossed away. I have to show sympathy, bend my brain to see what makes them 'them' and see how sensible it is for them so that I can survive and thrive.
Some I had to accept that we either lived in vastly different realities in which such a character is sensible, and that's just the world we live in; or they're just bonkers. We move on.
I am compelled to write because I want to explore something that I find has not been explored. If it was already done to my satisfaction? I have literally felt my interest dip like a video game health bar in that situation.
My MCs as SIs cannot be divorced from my background. Ostensibly, that's the square-shaped brain with the math and engineering, the ADHD, and the internal snark. But those traits don't exist in a vacuum. Luckily my interests aligned with my parents' hopes and dreams for me as poor immigrants to the US and I am the first to have an advanced degree since my family has been wiped through the Cultural Revolution; though they were lucky enough to be sponsored by an aunt that married a missionary.
The ADHD was undiagnosed because god forbid I had Problems, "What do you mean Vermillion has problems? She's so bright! She never has to study! She has so much potential!" I have a brother who has problems, and both culturally American and Chinese I have been trained to Not Have Problems because I'm supposed to keep the household together. Plus, we're poor. We can't afford that! We're poor, we have family problems, AND our child has mental issues? They already say enough shit about Chinese people, jeeze.
The internal snark--it does hurt a bit inside whenever I see the reaction to my brand of humor in my fics as if it's meant to be expressed to tell people off, mic drop, actions having no consequences. You know what that is? It's coping. It's also developing the social wherewithal to be circumspect because your livelihood depends on it. And beyond just me, the internal pressure of carrying my family's expectations and wanting to not make their sacrifices in vain--that doubles the risk.
No fucking way do I mouth off without thinking (not since I was actually eight, and learning ever since), and that's why my characters are the way they are. We see a spectrum of them: Zhu Yunxun that needs to put up a front to maintain societal privilege and also is lucky to be born with money and lineage; SI!Taiga with money, physical + mental advantages, gender on his side, and talent; Lan Wenhui born into lineage, physical advantages, privilege, and talent, but still a woman; and now...Korvin Kwan with only the advantage of youth and male privilege. I am a point of departure for each of these and despite whatever gains that have been made with these new lives, I know myself well enough and have been burned before that it's instinctual to not grow into that privilege as if you've always had it.
Zhu Yunxun needs to walk a delicate tightrope of politics and intrigue and is wildly windmilling in the air, even if they're staying on.
SI!Taiga is so baffling to the Clown Gang because he doesn't act like a typical cocksure talented sports boy.
Lan Wenhui...she has her convolutions to be revealed.
Korvin is perpetually at the end of his fucking rope (like, what's Bat-WIng-Guy gonna do? Kill him for swearing? It'd at least cut out the middlemen for child trafficking), and just managed to trust Dick and Babs. Now that he has some sort of solid ground beneath him, that's where we get the chapter 4 code switching and masking.
Actions, and speaking is an action, have consequences and my SIs are me. They live with that philosophy.
We see ten million and one characters that like to loudly and boldly declare themselves, with the implication that they truly believe everything they say matters and will make a difference. They will be heard!
There's no catharsis for those who need to keep it in, where catharsis isn't actually worth it.
You might think: well, that's just on you. You choose to internalize this, you choose to make your family your pressure, you choose to not speak up--
And then I would point out, again, that culture and background makes people. Being diaspora, it influences what I find socially important. And it's even more important because I grew up poor. There's a realm of difference between the professional and well-off Chinese diaspora vs the ones that had to cram in the slums of Chinatown. My family was luckily not at the tail end, but we were nothing like the well-off (I'm lucky that we've essentially achieved the vaunted American Dream, now). To us growing up like that, family was your support network. Regardless of how shitty they are, what they do, the cost of cutting them out was rarely worth it.
And now that I've gone into my professional life--I'm lucky enough that I've either made others think they can't talk shit to my face, or my poker face was strong enough to survive the utter bullshit I've heard told to me like it was the weather. I thank them for their time, and I do what I need to do to navigate the situation. Usually, I don't have the power to do much but survive, so I did. And now, I've reached a point where 1) times are changing 2) I'm niche and competent enough that people are too busy listening to what I have to say than condescend me 3) I can shut them down if they do 4) the field I'm working in values circumspection as a whole.
===
Anyways, this is probably a big bubble burst for my fics. I know a lot of people enjoy them for the funnies, but the funnies come from somewhere. I think I build compelling characters and interpersonal relationships because I work to ground them in reality and what I know and have learned through my own experiences and needing to empathize with others.
My writing is my catharsis. Every time I'm able to resonate with someone out there, I'm happy if someone completely different from me can understand, and I'm even happier if I make another person like me feel seen.
Anyways, that's my kinda intense and sad TED talk, I need to go back to writing my application statement.
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Heya! So today I decided to do a Dabi fanfic for y'all so enjoy
Friend or foe
You walk back to your apartment wornout from a long day at work when you get a phone call from your mom. You pick up the phone. "What is it ?" You ask with a worn out sigh.
"are you at your house?" Your mom asks through the phone.
"no but I'm close.... excuse me why does that matter so much right now?" You feel yourself getting irritated so you take a deep breath.
"there's been way to many amber alerts in you neighborhood for my comfort." You mom says like she's lecturing you. "I think you should move back in with your dad and me."
"I'm hanging up now." You sigh. "Don you d-" you cut your mom's sentence off as you click the end call button.
"she worries to much" you say to yourself as you reach your apartment building. You see a small cheep looking moving van next your apartment building. "Perfect more people to deal with" you mumble.
As your walk Into the building you see a man wearing a black hoodie with the hood up carrying boes I to the elevator.
"There's no way I'm avoiding this is there?" You think to yourself as you debate between taking the elevator or the stairs. You decide to take the elevator.
"which floor?" The man asks looking at you. "Fifth" you respond quickly pulling your hood up. "Heh guess where on the same floor" the man smiles slightly but it's not exactly a nice smile.
"wonderful" you mutter leaning against the elevator wall to gain more distance from the stranger.
The elevator door opens and you walk out first. As you walk you notice the man is following you but ignore it. You stop Infront of your door and he walks past you. Stoping at the door next to yours.
"you have to be kidding me" you mutter a little to loudly as you unlock your door and open it.
"you know when you talk trash about people you generally don't do it in front of them" he gives you a blank stare.
"I'm not talking trash about you I'm talking trash about everyone." With that you walk into your apartment and close the door.
~~~~~~
Later that night you walk into your balcony for fresh air. After you'd just had a argument on the phone with your mom.
"why can't that lady mind her own business... Grown ass adult" you lean on the railing of your balcony.
"you know you should really be more observant of your surroundings." You jump as you here a voice coming from your next door neighbor. When you turn around to see him you realize he's covered in what looks to be burns
"maybe you shouldn't sneak up on people!"
Your neighbor chuckles and smirks. "Technically I was out here first." You stare at him not sure what to say. "Too shay." you respond
"sorry about earlier." You look down. Don't worry about it. I'v had a lot meaner things said to me." takes out a cigarette and flicks his fingers blue fire appearing on his hand.
"that's a impressive quirk" you stare at the fire mesmerized as he lights his cigarette. "Yeah it is pretty cool" he puts the fire out and puts the cigarette in his mouth.
"what's your quirk?" He asks looking at you. "It's nothing special" you look away.
"oh come on it can't be that bad" he looks at you curiously.
"I can enter people dreams" you look down. he smiles"that's a pretty interesting quirk. How does it work?"
"well if someone is sleeping If I focus hard enough I can enter there dreams and I can walk around talk to them that stuff. But I sometimes activate by accident."
"that's a pretty useful quirk" he puts his cigarette out and turns his full attention to you. "You think so?" You smile hopefully.
"yeah I mean think about how much you could learn about someone." He stretches his arms above his head and you see just how burnt his arms are. "Can I ask you a personal question?" You look at him.
The man sighs as he sees you looking at his scars. "Yeah go ahead" he looks like he knows what you're about to ask.
"what's your name?" He raises a brow seeming surprised by your question. You smile to yourself at the fact you caught him off guard.
He smiles and rolls his eyes. "My name's Dabi" he looks at you like he's accepting a big reaction. You smile "nice to meet you Dabi, I'm y/n." You smile at him.
"y/n?" He muttes to himself like he's testing the sound of your name.
"yep that's me"
You shiver slightly as a cold breeze comes by. "Well it's getting late and I have work Tomorrow"
"yeah" he looks at you like he's disappointed.
"g-night Dabi" you wave as you slide open you screen door "night" Dabi sigh's.
~~~~
The next day you wake up to your phone buzzing. You pick up the phone to see your mom's caller ID which is labeled worry wort.
"what does she want now?" You mumble as you pick up the phone.
"what do you want?" You say tiredly.
"where are you right now!?" You mom says sounding panicked.
"in my bed" you sit up and rub your eyes. "What's wrong?"
"there's been a villain sighting right in your area." You mom says sounding like she had seen the villain herself.
"mom I'm fine and no villain is going to be interested in me" you sigh standing up And walking to your balcony
"we'll be careful and don't talk to strangers" you mom say's like your a teenager going to the mall for the first time.
"oh my freaking gosh mom I'm not 15!" You yell getting slightly mad you here someone trying not to laugh from behind you. You run to see Dabi leaning against his screen door staring at you.
"don't give me that attitude young lady!" Your mom shouts back. You glare at Dabi who's smirking at you. "I'm hanging up now" you hang up before she can respond.
"that was one heck of a show" Dabi says clapping sarcasticly. "Oh haha" you roll your eyes
"do you usually hangout on your balcony pajamas or?" He says with a cocky grin. "Shut up Dabi!" You feel the heat rising to your face
"no thx. Actually I have a reason for being out here." He leans on the railing of his balcony.
"and what would that be?" You give him a puzzled look. "I was wondering if you wanted to get dinner together tonight?" He looks away.
"are you asking me on a date?". You smile teasingly. "Maybe I am" he looks back at you making you blush from his forward ness.
"fine I expect. Pick me up at eight" you walk into your apartment. And get ready for the day with a big smile on your face. "It's been a while since I was on a date you think to yourself"
~~~~
Later that day you finish getting ready with ten minutes to spare so you turn on the news. You see a news alert flash across the screen with Dabi's face saying dangerous villain. You freeze in horror. "Is he?..no he can't be." You say trying to convince yourself.
You hear a knock on your door. "Hey y/n you ready?" You recognize Dabi's voice immediately and turn off the TV.
"ye-yeah I'm ready" you stutter as you stand up and walk towards the door.
when you open the door you see Dabi's in a T-shirt and a coat.
"you okay? You lool like you've seen a ghost." He says putting his hand to your forehead.
"hey Dabi?" You look down scared as you feel his extremely hot hand touch your forehead.
"what is it?" He looks at you curiously as he removes his hand.
"are you a villain?" Your whole body is shaking and he notices it and sighs. "Yeah so?".
You look at him surprised. "Is that gonna stop you from going on a date with me?" He looks at you like nothings happened.
"what kind of question is that of course it will!" You look at him slightly mad. "Wow your skimping free food cuz I'm a so called villain." He looks at you like you insulted him.
"are you shaming me?" You look at him suspiciously.
"maybe..is it working?" He smirks.
"yes" you look down.
"then what are you waiting for let's go" he starts walking towards the elevator and you follow him closing your door.
"I'm so stupid" you think to yourself.
Hi I hope you liked it I kinda got bored waiting for the voting poll thing to hurry up so I wrote this
Anywho have a nice day bye~
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Not so much a theory but just me trying to make sense of everything that's happened so far. This will be a stream-of-consciousness dump.
LINK CLICK S2E8 SPOILERS!!!
------------
So remember how, in season 1, when CXS changed something in the past, it would later reflect in their present? In the kidnapped child case, kid!CXS and adult!CXS had appeared at the same time. In the Xu Shanshan case, the gang received a mysterious call, which turned out to be because an alt!CXS had issued a challenged to red-eyes in the past.
So with that in mind, we can just focus on one timeline—the one being shown to us. Any changes made in alternate timelines would reflect in the present that the audience sees.
Our current present is LG saving CXS from being kidnapped, resulting in him taking his place.
Qiao Ling had hypothesized that maybe that wasn't Lu Guang but an alt-timeline!CXS because LG seemed more physically strong.
For this hypothesis to be true, CXS has to dive into the past as Lu Guang and rescue the past!CXS in one go. (A photo can only be used once.)
The chances of this going correctly is slim. Without Lu Guang, Cheng Xiaoshi has no idea what's gonna happen while in the dive. He didn't even know what object Lu Guang used to break the window (it was definitely not the kettle!). Also, does he even know where to find a speedboat? How about driving one? And if you had looked closely in the LG and LTC fight, you can see that LG was always trying to avoid being touched by LTC. That means he already knows how his ability is activated. On the off-chance CXS manages to reach past!CXS on time, it will all be for naught anyway coz he won't able to defend against LTC.
That's why I think Qiao Ling is wrong. It was never an alt!LG. It was the real Lu Guang all along.
As for how to explain his improved physical state... well, that's something I don't have an answer yet for. I do believe in the alt-timeline/future Lu Guang theories, though. If LG is from the future, maybe he's had some time to train.
Another theory of mine is that LG didn't actually suddenly got better at martial arts. He just knew how Li Tianchen would move, so he was able to defend against him. (Maybe LG can see the future).
Or maybe Lu Guang had relived this rescue many times and only now did he finally get it right. (Time loop maybe?)
As for him being able to resist the pain of his injury... idk man, adrenaline, I guess? Love can make you desperate lol.
Anyways, writing-wise, it's so easy to just dump everything on Lu Guang coz he's still shrouded in mystery. He's always seemed like he knows a lot about their abilities, and who knows what the true extent of his abilities is.
If Cheng Xiaoshi can't do the rescue right in one go, then how are they gonna explain him diving a second time?
Also, I find it hard to believe that CXS would want to endanger Lu Guang many times while he's acting as him. If he just doesn't dive, won't Lu Guang be saved?
What's sus here is the photo LG left. Did he know CXS can open his phone, or was that a save point he had actually left for himself in case he fails to save CXS?
But why would he not bring his phone? Was he afraid the enemy would get ahold of it?
But without his phone, and by extension, the photo, how can he go back in time?
Maybe his time-travel ability doesn't require a photo? (LTC definitely didn't have a photo when he was controlling WJ and CXS. His ability was just activated by touch)
Come to think of it, CXS's ability is also activated by touch (clapping). What about Lu Guang? Maybe he has a touch-based ability, too. After all, they can have more than one abilities.
LG can see what happens in a photo, and thru CXS diving, he can also record it. If it's a CCTV, he can hijack it and make it his eyes.
LTC can possess someone directly, but he can also just bewitch them through touch.
CXS can go back in time, and he can also possess people
I have no idea where I'm going here... Still confused as ever
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We made it! Yippee! Thank you everyone for this milestone, I'm feeling super happy about it hehe. It's a nice gift to wake up to. I promised to do a face reveal but I want to see if I can hand over an old selfie instead. I do have some updates to give since I see it as an appropriate time to share and they'll be below the cut!
But before that, I want to say thank you again. I really wouldn't be much without you guys haha.
What happens @ 600 followers?:
Well, I’m not doing an event until 666 followers (Badum tss) but a while ago I did promise a face reveal so behold:
An extremely edited photo of me from about a year ago before I had my apartment. This, is 20 year old me in my grandma's basement... In a maid dress... Drinking a bang energy in front of my PC set up... (I still own my maid dress if anyone needs me to clean their house for them) I am in fact a REAL PERSON! Behold me. I won’t do a proper face reveal until I’m a little happier with myself as I am dealing with a lot of mental issues as of recent.
What’s going on?:
To make a long story short; I just got laid off at my job and I have to move in January. I do have some requests in queue and I am going to be on and offline as I look for a job and get unemployment for the time being. They said they will bring me back January 1st but they forget I am an adult with no support from my parents so I need to work to live. I won't be taking commissions as I cannot live off of those and again due to mental issues I have been having my production times for my commissions has gotten increasingly slow over the past year. I cannot complete them in a timely manner to keep my head above water. My last check will go towards rent and I NEED a job by next week as I need to save for my deposit in January for my new apartment (1,000 dollars) and I need to pay my last bill of the month (40.55 in consumers haha).
I am moving in January because me and my little sister agreed we would live together for a year and then live on our own. So, we're in the same neighborhood but our own apartment so if we need each other we're still close. Our lease is over on the 27th of January so I need to get all the money I have so I can be prepared. It's crunch time! I don't want to ask for charity, but I do want to express that my inbox will be staying closed so I can focus on adulting.
As you can see, I queue my posts like this so I always appear active online when the truth is: I'm probably sleeping/at work/writing/ect. I have the persona of a chronically online hikikomori, but the truth is I'm just a depressed person haha.
What about January?:
By January I won't plan to move for a long time as the rent is very cheap and the building allows smokers which is a big bonus for me. The usual response is; why don't you quit smoking?
Do you know how hard and expensive that is? Kicking a bad habit is hard enough, but doing that for the sake of HOUSING is not a good reason to quit. My survival shouldn't have anything to do with that. And also... The non smoking apartments are very boujiee and I don't like those kinds of uppity neighborhoods. I seek comfort in familiar and more impoverished areas. And again, dirt cheap rent. I'll be offline for the first few weeks of January and working on moving into my new apartment and I'll be updating you guys once I do! I can't use my PC since... Well, I gotta cut my internet off before I move haha. And my consumers the day of so they can turn my lights on at my other place. I am very excited that I have a new spot and I need to just get my deposit, and I'll deal with rent when I get to it along with all my other bills. I'm anxious and excited for the future. And with enough hard work I can strive towards a getting a small house.
But with the economy? ... Let's stick with an apartment. <3
Thank you for reading. And as always,
The Devil Loves You!
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day 3 of 30 // human happiness lies in a series of tensions 🍋
i haven't been able to sleep well since i started this challenge and i don't know why. maybe it's because i'm too excited? 😅 i do know that i feel such a strong sense of purpose now and i don't want to give it up 🥺 i'm hoping it's one of those things that gets easier with time🤞
that said, the information overload is starting to feel unsustainable, so i will adjust, at least for now, because retention is more important to me than apparent volume 😌 new goals for the rest of this challenge:
watch 2 videos on useful Korean expressions in a week instead of every other day
review vocabulary 2 days a week
today's accomplishments 💯
🙊 watch one video from useful Korean expressions playlist
🥰 physiotherapy exercises (morning set)
🥰 ran (2m, 15s break, 1m)
🙊 completed Japanese lesson (2x)
🙊 completed Korean lesson (2x)
🧠 read Clinical case studies (3x)
🧠 read for Cognitive Psych (focus time: 1h 30m)
🙊 completed Chinese lesson (2x)
🥰 physiotherapy exercises (evening set)
❤️ practiced mindfulness meditation for daily life to help me give my full attention to everyone i talked to today
❤️ vocabulary with my practice sentences + random psychology facts under the cut if you're interested ☺️ have a lovely day! 🌷
I forgot I even learned these 😅
Japanese
すみません — excuse me, すみません 学生ですか? (trans: excuse me, are you a student?)
ごろ — about (as in time), 一じごろです (trans: it's about 1 o'clock)
半 — half, 二じ半です (trans: it's half past 2)
Korean
건강 — health, 건강 원해요 (trans: i want health)
다섯 — five, 저는 귤 다섯 개 못 먹어요 (trans: i can't eat five tangerines)
여섯 — six, 가족은 사람이 여섯 명 있어요 (trans: there are six people in the family)
아홉 — nine, 우리는 차에 상자가 아홉 개 못 있어요 (trans: we can't have nine boxes in our car)
어둠 — dark, 집은 안에 어둠니다 (trans: it's dark inside the house)
군처 — near, 내 근처에 와서 안자 (trans: come sit near me)
일곱 — seven, 저는 이 일곱 권의 책들을 좋아요 (trans: i like these seven books)
Chinese
帮 — help, 帮我 (trans: help me)
认识 — meet, 昨天我认识 我的朋友 (trans: yesterday i met my friend)
旅游 — travelling, 我旅游 (trans: i travel)
明白 — understand, 我不明白但我爱你 (trans: i don't understand but i love you)
从 — from, 从这里 (trans: from here)
走 — walk/go/leave (similar to 去 but can't be used to describe an object), 为什么走? (trans: why go?)
还是 — or, 喝咖啡还是喝茶 (trans: drink coffee or drink tea)
i actually kind of remember these but only when i see it 👀
上网 — online, 我是上网 (trans: i am online)
喜欢 — like/enjoy (similar to 想), 我喜欢上网 (trans: i enjoy being online)
水果 — fruit, 我想水果 (trans: i want fruit)
这里 — here, 我是这里 (trans: i am here)
酒店 — hotel, 这里是酒店 (trans: here is the hotel)
汽车 — car, 这里是汽车 (trans: here is the car)
学习 — study, 我学习很快 (trans: i learn quickly)
These are actually new (新), woohoo!
因为 — because, 因为我学习所以我很高兴 (trans: because i study, so i am happy)
新 — new, 新字 (trans: new character)
所以 — so, 我很高兴, 所以 我可爱 (trans: i'm happy, so i'm cute 🙈)
Random Psychology Things 🧠
flashbulb memories are vivid but inaccurate or lack detail
reminiscence bump — we remember adolescent/young adult memories better
when someone immigrated later in life (e.g. in their thirties) as opposed to earlier, their reminiscence bump shifts because their adolescence/young adulthood wasn't followed by a period of calm/stability when the memories could be consolidated and/or because the period of the most rapid changes in their life was their thirties as they were immigrating
youth bias — we think the most important public (national/international) events in our lives will happen in our youth
#studyblr#langblr#seventeen#leveling up#level up journey#jeonghan#study motivation#student life#study inspiration#girlblogging#studyspo#productivity#100 days of productivity#30 days of productivity#korean langblr#japanese langblr#chinese langblr#becoming that girl#astudentslifebuoy#daily routine#workout routine#workout progress#academic validation#cute aesthetic#light academia#chaotic academia#zesty's life#100 days of studying#100 days of self discipline
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Your post did make me reevaluate some things.
Like you do have a point that george should have been more empathetic to the pain he caused in his first response.
I just hope this will spark more on a discussion on how men treat women, especially in CCs spaces.
But can't help but also feel bad for them after the past year where they suffer from a false allegation, especially dream, which people are still targeting even tho he's not the main focus (but still in part responsible)
You got a point, it's only just unfortunate that just before this they suffered for things that actually wasn't their fault and it's still affecting them to this day.
And I know they shouldn't be the main focus other than caiti
i think a lot of men are very ignorant even if they themselves think they aren't. some of those men who are replying to george's tweets right now and condemning him have probably done bad things as well without realising it, which is kinda fucked up, but i hope george serves as an example for them and all of them, especially george, will be more caring towards women around them, whether they've been friends for a long time or just met them. as a content creator george has many responsibilities, and he clearly haven't been "cautious", as he said, enough. i think when your best friend has been dealing with grooming allegations for like eight months (at that time) it is logical to be INCREDIBLY careful around women noticeably younger than you. and i'm obviously not blaming caiti, she is the victim in this situation and george is paying the price for that right now, what i'm trying to say is it's fucking stupid to flirt with someone without learning their age in this context, i would be so fucking paranoid to do that while witnessing dream's situation up close, no matter how drunk i am. so what he did was stupidly irresponsible, and i cannot begin to express how much i feel for caiti, i hope he releases a proper apology (and if possible contacts her privately because she deserves to hear this directly i feel like) and she heals from this.
now, the hate! i think both dream and george have been blinded by the hate they have been receiving, and this part of george's statement made me particularly angry. they've been so caught up in the hate they get from that cc group, it made them completely overlook caiti's feelings. and i would understand that to some degree but george took more than twenty four hours to release his statement. i think he (and dream) had had plenty of time to realise that this should not be the main point of what's happening. the main point should be the girl that george has unintentionally hurt who deserved an apology for that, and this is what he was supposed to end his statement on. i get where he was coming from, but instead of trying to search for a reason of "why she's doing this to me" he should've been Empathetic. she cried so fucking hard during that stream, and if that wasn't enough for him to start feeling bad, then he needs to go to fucking therapy and learn to be an emotionally responsible adult. you are twenty seven, she is nineteen. come the fuck on
#i hope you realise this is all coming from a george main#i have loved him so fucking much he was my literal baby AND my muse#drawing him was so fucking fun for me i loved every minute of it#and besides drawing ive learned how to make gifs and how to make fucking s.ims cc brah#i've never put so much of myself into the fandom before and all of the stuff i did i did because of george#so you can imagine how hard it has been on me#Be so fucking kind#nia ask
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