Take a Deep Breath
Another morning awakening, another daymare begins. In an instant, I wake up to confront the intense cold and inhale the stifling air, courtesy of the misty cloth shrouding the mud, moss, and wooden planks that have been my home for the past two years.
I wrap myself in the only clothing I've known during this time and swear by the rifle in my hands for protection against those on the other side of the front, looming above our necks. In these brief moments of standing, I sense an uncommon harmony within my own context, unsure whether to feel concern or gratitude. It's at times like these that my mind drifts to memories of home, seeking distraction from thoughts of the potential changes the day might bring in the event of a stand-off—not to escape my reality, but to fortify myself for more than I can endure.
Truth be told, I can no longer recall if I entered this hell of my own accord or if the call came to me, along with thousands of other young men who have become my brothers in pain. But at this point, it hardly matters. The only reward surpassing any medal or promotion is making it through another night alive in these trenches, praying the next day won't plunge us into engagement.
-
As I make my way to the nearest command post of the trench, a roar from the other side startles us all, akin to the awakening of an enraged beast rumbling through earth and noise.
In response, my mind instinctively seeks shelter at any gap or steep corner between the dirt floor and the earthen ramparts, praying that none of those projectiles will land on me. But when the shells finally drop, the shock of their fall brings only horror, not just for the destruction they cause but for the malevolent aftermath they unleash.
Soon, with no escape, a suffocating chemical cloud envelops us, a man-made enforcer hunting for our indiscriminate extermination within the walls that were meant to shield us. The poison advancing towards us compels me to stand up and search for the one salvation we were all anxiously prepared for—the gas mask, which I've safeguarded since the day it was issued to me. Frantically, I scramble to my pit, accelerating my steps before more cannon fire shatters the air.
-
Desperation drives everyone to run in search of escape from this menace, either seeking their own masks or attempting to flee the trenches in desperation, falling under fire the moment they become visible to our tormentors at the front.
I turn corners as fast as I can when, right before my eyes, another bomb falls, obstructing my path to the short trench route. I turn around, risking myself by taking the longer route, covering my face to prevent the gas from reaching me.
In my path, I watch as comrades fall, their slim hope of life extinguished once fully exposed to the gas. Others fight over the few masks left loose, stealing the chance of life from their peers after months of shared struggle. All to survive one more day in these troubled times.
-
After enduring all this hell, I manage to reach my belongings and rummage through the bag for my precious mask. As the somber silhouette of smoke surrounds the area, my hope fades away when I am unsuccessful.
Desperation leads me to tear at my bag like a brute, throwing everything to the ground, rummaging through the mud in a futile attempt to find it. Clinging to the only thing that could keep me alive and reunite me with my family, I tear one of my clothes lying on the floor and quickly urinate on it.
Disgusting as it is, we were instructed that this would be nothing more than a last resort against the chlorine, having faith that it will work against the gas as I place it against my face and pray that this makeshift solution will save me.
-
In my waiting, I lean against the mud, hoping this makeshift method will be enough to stop the chemicals. Simultaneously, I lean into the absolute darkness flooding my mind with fear. At that moment, something clings to my leg, and I'm pulled back into the awareness of the situation I must endure.
Suddenly, the hand of a young boy, not much younger than my eldest son, weakly clutches mine as his life fades from the gas on his unshielded face. Out of the depths of my consciousness, and with nothing more I can do once the toxic fumes invade his body, I hold his hand in his last moments, offering a pulse of relief on his journey to the heavens.
The look in his eyes, full of fear and misery, disturbs my heart as I contemplate the horror of my own children enduring situations like this and not returning after such a dreadful demise. Regardless of how perfect my life was before this, just by stepping into this strife, I've failed in my commitment to spend the rest of my days, anticipating that this conflict would be something easily overcome once it concluded, as my consciousness falls asleep in memories of peace.
-
As the hours pass, the gas gradually dissipates, carrying the mist that began the morning with it. I release the pale hand of the young man lying on the ground, closing his eyes as a sign of respect for what he endured in his final moments.
Physically and mentally exhausted, I wander the abandoned trenches in search of anyone else, unsuccessful in every corner, with nothing but corpses on the ground and a mess created by the shelling. Unconsciously, I venture outside against all rules, finding nothing but a desolate landscape mirroring the disaster we've caused, which, for the first time in months, I contemplate in greater depth.
In a small irony, the only thing I find on the dirt floor is an abandoned gas mask, buried in the mud. I pick it up with indifference, wondering if it might still be useful for a future I'm uncertain of.
-
My gaze turns to the front, where the smoking trail of shelling seems to answer what I failed to notice in the struggle for survival. At this point, I don't know which path to take—whether to return to the front with my comrades for a dire end or attempt to escape this on my own, losing myself in the nothingness of this battered land.
My chances are nil, and fate remains uncertain. Regardless of the decision I make, I'll have to face it alone. No matter how weary my soul may be, I've witnessed man's ignorance toward the suffering of others so often that, at this stage, my fears of what I might encounter along the way may linger long after the war ends.
But sometimes, it's not the fear of death that men like me fear most. Sometimes, it's the long-burning fear of living another day through the horrors of men that concerns me most about the fog shrouding not only my future but the future of those I care for.
Ps: A small update of this short story I wrote around January/February of this year.
Original date of publication: 20/02/2023
Made using MediBang
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[OUTDATED]🦋SRABBA TALK | PERSONAL STORY AND LWS1
SOOOO guess who just finished living world season ONE today? that's right. this guy. first and foremost I LOVED IT? i played through it before but sorta blew through everything, but actually taking time to experience the story was very fun
and now, the even funner part... writing about what srabba was up to during it all! i'll be doing this for each part of gw2's story for fun, and to articulate my thoughts about it!
⚠️ MAJOR SPOILERS FOR PERSONAL STORY (1-80) AND LIVING WORLD SEASON ONE BELOW THE CUT
Beginning with the personal story, Srabba actually has no involvement with the war and eventual death of Zhaitan.
Srabba is only 13 when the events of personal story take place, and thus she has no real place to be at on the battle-field. However, she kept tabs on the new research and theories springing up as more was uncovered about the elder dragon of death.
While she was doing pre-college studies in Metrica Province, Srabba kept up to date on the situation mainly through research papers, news articles and word of mouth. Zhaitan wasn't exactly a quiet affair, so there was plenty of hubbub about the dragon and the three orders— the Vigil, Priory, and Order of Whispers— coming together (for once) to take down the dragon.
The breakthroughs during this time: the confirmation of one Professor Gorr's theory— the dragons consume magic, thereby taking it out of Tyria and growing stronger in doing so— has monumental affirmations and implications, and Srabba finds herself more and more fascinated in the topic.
Because of this, she sort of... nudges her other projects aside. Chaos magic can be put on hold, she'll keep her hearing aid development on the back-burner— this, this dragon research... It was incredible, and Srabba was eager to know more.
Thus, Srabba decided that after turning 14 and enrolling in the college of Dynamics (after proving herself with a clever invention called the Transatmospheric converter— a blend of asura intellect, mesmer chaos magic, and elemental magic), she'd make a name for herself in becoming an expert in dragon magic. Alongside chaos magic, of course. You can be a genius in two things, after all.
Srabba's choice in enrolling in Dynamics was a success in keeping aligned with her goals. Statics only focused on what they already had, and Synergetics... bleh. Too theoretical and philosophical for her tastes. Dynamics got things done in new and innovative ways, and Srabba made a name for herself in her class with her bright, cutting-edge ideas. She was regarded positively by her professors, albiet some of her peers found her a bit... egotistical... and some of her professors found her a bit too smart.
Nonetheless, Srabba was thriving in college.
And then... Scarlet happened.
First it was Dragon Bash. Then it was the Queen's Jubilee. Then it was the wretched tower in Kessex Hills. It didn't take long for word to travel back to the asura side of Tyria, and Srabba once again found her putting her projects aside for a new interest: Scarlet Briar.
Now, Srabba could care less about Scarlet as a person. As far as Srabba cared, she was a crazed Sylvari who liked explosions and bombs a little too much. It was her machines— her alchemy and magitech and gizmos galore— that Srabba really cared about. Srabba found Scarlet to be a genius, and she needed to study some of this genius' work.
Thus, Srabba sort of... Oh.. Y'know... Snuck out under everyone's noses and onto one of the sites of Scarlet's latest monstrosity: the Clockwork Marionette. She wasn't there for the fight, personally, but was found by Logan Thackeray snooping around in debris and fancy shiny bits and rubble. Not only did he have one nosy progeny to deal with, but now two nosy progeny.
Srabba and Taimi had no prior interactions, and as far as they knew before this moment, the other didn't exist. However... If it meant annoying some dumb human...
And with that, a beautiful friendship was born.
Upon being dragged back to Lion's Arch to be sent away to Rata Sum upon a guardian taking ownership of them, Srabba and Taimi got to actually chatting, and found they both had quite a lot in common.
One, they were both orphans. Two, they both were disabled and hated getting pitying looks because of it. Three, they were both brilliant prodigy progeny, and hated even more when people doubted them for their age. And four, they both were fixated with Scarlet and her work.
... As far as Srabba figured, though, Taimi was more curious about Scarlet as a person, and the two had plenty of slight bickering about who knew the most about her or was going about thinking about her the right way— much to everyone else's dismay.
It is around this point Srabba begins to become not the leader, but a facet in the budding new guild, composed of Marjory Delequa, Kasmeer Meade, Braham Eirsson, and Rox— Oh! And Frostbite, too.
In canon, the Commander eventually brings everybody together, but fate somehow managed to gather all of them in one place, and it didn't take the group long to bond.
They have two brawn, two investigators, and now two brain. A perfect even number!
... Odd, if you count Frostbite, though. But Srabba doesn't like odd numbers, so it's an even number now. Hmph.
However, the guild doesn't have time to frolic around. Scarlet clearly is planning something, and the group is determined to figure out what. Srabba manages to participate in some evidence scouring with an asura by the name of Vorpp, and Kasmeer and Majory. To everyone's horror, they all put together that Scarlet isn't just planning something big, she's planning to strike Lion's Arch, and she's about to strike it hard.
Scarlet soon unleashes her greatest atrocity on Lion's Arch: an all out catastrophic attack.
Lion's Arch is gunned, bombed, and a thick miasma soon takes over and claims anyone who is exposed to it for too long. All forms of terrible enemies— Flame Legion, Inquest, Aetherblade pirates, Krait, Dredge, and Nightmare Court— lay siege to Lion's Arch and kill anyone who doesn't escape or tries to stand in their or their leader, Scarlet Briar's, way.
The attack reaches Srabba— who away tending to her studies and research— and the news mortifies her. Although she's dealing with college and papers and exams and her own mini research projects, she feels a strong calling to head out and help.
She has a rendezvous with Taimi at one of the refugee/rally camps nearby the Vigil headquarters, and to see all the damage up close... Survivors recounting the horrors and losses, resources spread thin, people dying with little hope to save them... It takes Srabba out of her comfortable bubble of research and onto the field, and the sight not only horrifies her, but it sparks something in her usually cold heart— forget all about studying Scarlet; the only thing Srabba wants to study is a way to put that wretched sylvari down for good.
However, the rest of the group makes an effort to keep Srabba out and away from danger— they don't want to bring anyone else in to the battle, where the probability of death for a 14 year old with only three years of magical experience and little to no combative experience... Eh, it's better if one doesn't say the exact numbers. (NOTE: They aren't high.)
This enrages Srabba, but despite her anger she knows they aren't exactly wrong.
After Scarlet is slain, something... Happens.
Srabba was in the midst of studying artificing when even she heard a wretched noise— it was a loud, rumbling sound on par with a growl, or a howl, or a roar.
It didn't take long until Taimi urgently contacted her via digitized mail, and despite initial suspicions, Srabba came to the same conclusion as Taimi: that was the roar of a dragon.
Srabba didn't take long puzzling why the roar happened in the first place. Scarlet had descended upon Lion's Arch with some horrible platformed drill that struck into Lion's Arch's sea. Previous discoveries unveiled that Scarlet had been toying and pin-pointing and probing for ley-lines, and Lion's Arch had been the main target on her maps.
Synergetic research dictates that all of Tyria is loaded with ley-lines: rivers and streams of (usually) invisible magic. Wherever magic travels, it travels along ley-lines that dot Tyria's entire expanse. Scarlet Briar had dug up a ley-line, and made a racket so loud it may have drawn the attention of a dragon.
Srabba had plenty of papers to back it up, but not even she wanted to believe it. She knew Zhatian— with it's risen minions and death magic— was bad enough, but what Scarlet could have woken up... It could be much, much worse. What was worse was that Srabba couldn't figure out which dragon Scarlet's infernal drill had woken up, and this put her on edge... Thankfully, her newfound friends could try and soothe those nerves after calling everyone to the Dead End Bar for some food, drink, and light celebration in taking Scarlet down.
However... Srabba knows something lurks on the horizon.. Something bad.
To be continued...
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