I want to escape real life responsibilities with every fiber of my being
So I’ve been gone for a while. I had too much on my plate at the time to even think of doing anything writing related, let alone podcasting - as much as I wanted to do those things. I was working full time, going to school, planning a wedding, graduating with a BA in psych, planning an unexpected trip to New York, planning our honeymoon, relocating to the city and trying to find a better paying job there. . .Half of these things happened within the span of 3 months alone. It’s been the wildest time of my life to say at the least.
Now the honeymoon is over, and my husband and I are officially settled in our new lives as a married couple. We’re thrilled to be married, and we love the time we spend together when we’re off work. But we’ve both discovered, as writers that are not in writing related fields, our new jobs are leaving us feeling. . .Unsatisfied.
Neither jobs are what we expected them to be, and after working only a couple of months, I’m already looking for work elsewhere to focus on a slightly different avenue. I’m tired of waking up feeling a loss of appetite because this is the job I have to wake up to every day. I’m terrified of the idea of having to do something like this for the rest of my life.
The fact of the matter is, I want nothing more than to become a successful author. Successful enough to be able to make a living off of it, that is. My husband feels the same way as well. I’ve never before in my life wanted anything more than to just leave everything else behind, and pour all my time, attention, and resources into this dream of ours. Let me be clear about something: I am not spontaneous. At all. I carefully plan everything I do before I take action. I would never leave my job unexpectedly, especially for something so impractical. But I’ve never felt more tempted to take action on this dream before in my life.
“Why can’t I pursue this dream?” I’ve been asking myself. “All I have to do is just make it happen.” It sounds so simple, but I know it’s not realistic.
Though it pains me because writing is what I feel I do best. My husband has expressed feeling similarly about himself. I feel crippling imposter syndrome every day at my current job, when I’ve never felt that as a writer. All the more reason why I feel I’m meant to write.
Although I’m aiming to try traditional publishing first, I feel I would have the perseverance needed in order to tackle self publishing as well. The idea of writing every day and making a living off of that sounds heavenly to me. The idea of doing that and podcasting at the same time also sounds heavenly. I can’t help but wonder if I simply gave it my all, maybe I could eventually support myself as a writer. Perhaps we could support ourselves as writers. Or at the very least, I hope and pray for that.
One day, that is.
In the meanwhile I keep working my regular 40 hours at my current job, thinking of my dream job. I feel as if I’m wasting my time doing the wrong thing. Never have I felt it so strongly before. I feel as though I’m living the wrong life. I’m sure this is a universal feeling for all writers. But man. Doesn’t it suck?
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I don't think many people realize how much they've been turned into a bunch of casually cynical jerks.
Someone may come to their parents and say "I want to write a book" and their parents will say "it's really hard to get published".
Someone might confide in their sibling and say "I want to sell my art on "x" platform" and that sibling will say "do you know how many people you'd be competing with? Do you know how many shops are even on that platform?"
I know a kid who once told his best friend "I think I wanna start a dnd podcast" and the friend was like "do you know what the word "oversaturation" means?"
Personally, I don't know why any of that matters? And even if it did, perhaps your response should be "Do it! Do it and see where it goes!"
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can you believe that we have fanfiction. that we have websites dedicated to fanfiction. that there is a place that you can go and read tens, hundreds, thousands and thousands of pieces of writing that strangers have made. people who are not "writers". people who come home at the end of the day and have feelings and say, i am going to put that into words. i am going to share those words. short, long, sweet, sad, horny, funny, wonderful words. we are all just human and we all love to make and remake and share that with others. can you believe that.
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Reblog for a larger sample size!
No "show results", if you're not a fanfic writer just be patient.
I saw a post about an anon saying it was embarrasing to have an ao3 account in your 30s (it's absolutely not), so I want to do a poll and see what the age range actually is.
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I honestly and truly believe all good AUs should be a little “”””ooc”””” in the sense that good characterisation involves understanding that changes a characters backstory and circumstances will have an effect on how they respond to the world around them
Good characterisation isn’t about creating a perfect 1:1 canon replica it’s about understanding why a character is different in your work and about grounding the changes you do deliberately choose to make in canon character traits
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bisan's live video on her 2nd acc is piercing my heart
she started off expressing (in arabic) how sick she is of the constant sharing, photographing, capturing, having to speak english and how she wants to speak in her native tongue instead.
she explained that the leaflets that were dropped again are ordering evacuation to rafah so they are forced into the sinai, and how impossible it is for over 2 million people to go to an area that's only 151 square km, so many have no choice but to stay in khan younis. they are trapped and have no international passports. rafah is the southernmost point of palestine after khan younis and she said - this part in english - "after rafah there is no more palestine. if we are forced into rafah there is no more palestine."
someone asked her if she has eaten and whether they have any food, her response was no, not at all; one loaf of bread has to be divided between everyone in her tent.
the video kept freezing because of how bad the internet service is in gaza right now so i lost bits and pieces, but at some point an older woman joined the live, a journalist outside of the country. it's unclear whether they knew each other previously, but a lot of warmth was exchanged. the woman got tears out of bisan when she told her "dont listen to people who tell you to be strong, i don't want you to be strong, i want you to be you. if you are sad i want to know, if you are happy i want to know." she explained that she tried entering rafah but the occupation refuses to let any foreign journalists in anymore.
after the woman left, bisan talked about her life before october. she said her life was beautiful and fruitful and any source of strife was solely on israeli hands; namely her inability to travel or pursue placements for her education outside of palestine. other than that she had nothing to complain about. if im able to watch the video after it ends, i will add any pieces i missed
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Nothing destroyed my confidence as a writer like becoming a professional writer
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