#I had another say that I created the most positive learning environment she's ever had in college

[kafus]

why dot & episode 41 of pokemon horizons means so much to me as a recovering social recluse

when i got into pokemon horizons i had no idea whatsoever that my favorite character would end up being dot, one of the best handled social recluse characters i've ever seen in a piece of media. pokemon places such a large focus on adventure and travel, meeting new people and pokemon, so really the idea of a respectfully handled social recluse character just didn't seem to fit in with the concept. but now that the environment travels with the characters in the form of an airship, dot was able to be created and my god i love her. as someone who's been a recluse most of my life, even as a child, (i would qualify as a hikikomori and/or NEET at different stages of my life!) who is slowly crawling out of that pit, dot means the world to me.

there's a lot of good episodes that have some level of focus on dot but episode 41 in particular really blew me away and for the sake of my autistic ass desperately wanting to tell people about it i'm going to explain that here in trademark rambling fashion. obviously spoilers ahead - though not just for episode 41, i'm also going to be talking about earlier episodes a little bit. you've been warned!! if you don't want spoilers don't read below the cut ty!!

so episode 41. we meet dot's mother as the viewer who is there to pick up dot from her "trial period" on the brave asagi, learn about how dot ended up on the airship in the first place, and then at the end dot gets to have a showdown against her mother's lycanroc essentially to prove that she wants to, and can, stay permanently on the rising volteccers crew instead of going home. this is a huge turning point in dot's development as a character - at first she was a complete unknown only audible through her bedroom door, irritable to anyone who tried to speak to her, then over the course of the show she's managed to make friends with liko and roy, become a pokemon trainer, enjoy food with other people for seemingly the first time, and even caught tinkatink on her own accord pretty recently. and now this episode allows her to say in her own words that she isn't just on the ship experimentally, or because of murdock, or any other reason - she is choosing to be there and is enjoying learning more about other people and experiencing the outside world. again, this is a huge leap for someone who refused to show her face to the main characters for the first half of the show!

this on its own is already a pretty admirable character arc, one i can relate to, but i am really impressed by & feel seen by the way the writing handles her and that's really apparent in this episode. first i'm going to focus on how the writing and characters in the show respect dot's feelings despite her introversion and reclusion here.

dot's mom (blanca) is introduced to us as incredibly overbearing, to the point of freaking out and sending a bunch of angry stickers when murdock and dot don't immediately respond to her messages. dot's first response to seeing her mom is frustration instead of any level of positive response or excitement, which implies they don't have the best history, even before she actually starts talking about her past. i'm not trying to make this a post about dot's family psychology, maybe another time, but similarly to liko her situation is a bit fucked lmao (though for opposite reasons!)

the thing is - the adults around her are ALSO uncomfortable, in particular murdock, blanca's brother, which conveys a lot about the situation. she's not just some stubborn kid, there's legitimacy to her feelings, because if there wasn't the mature figures in this situation probably wouldn't also be reacting negatively, especially not murdock, dot's other relative here. from incredibly personal experience, it is so easy to wave off the feelings of a child, especially one as "difficult" and reclusive as dot, as just being some sort of phase, but already the writers are directly contrasting murdock, an adult dot is comfortable with who treats her with patience and respect, with blanca, who she evidently is not comfortable with - and they're respecting her feelings by making the adults in the show respect her feelings, too. and they're about to do a whole lot more of contrasting her mother with Everyone and Everything Else!

dot is continued to be understood and respected by the people who know her best in the case of liko and roy choosing to approach her to talk first. dot has run off to her room, where she usually is to get away from people, a very clear sign that she's struggling. liko and roy recognize this and cut blanca off from making the situation worse. which, of course they would, they're her friends and they genuinely care about her and understand how she behaves! they even know how to get her to come out her room without banging on her door and continuously yelling or something like that - direct contrast to them struggling with this much earlier in the show, by the way.

dot is happy to see them and much more willing to talk pretty much immediately, because guess what, they're people who respect her space and her feelings!!!

and once again, when blanca tries to force dot to speak before she's ready to (i mean come on you literally jumped her with this massive thing out of nowhere), liko jumps in and cuts blanca off to defend her and once again respect her feelings in a way that blanca definitely is not.

and finally, when they end up having a pokemon battle with each other...

blanca says this, yet another invalidation of dot's feelings and the way she responds to situations. this line actually made me viscerally uncomfortable, i remember the bitterness and upset i felt when i was a young person and my feelings, especially my frustrations with my parents and the way they handled my introversion, were invalidated on account of my age. "oh, it's just a phase" or "it's just because you're a kid" - just so incredibly frustrating.

and you know what that's followed up with?

dot speaking her fucking mind and kicking her mom's ass baby!!!! get her ass!!! let's GOOO. this part of the episode is so fucking rewarding. it's so good to see this character who has grown so much finally stand up for herself. she still needed a little bit of a push but that's OKAY!! the important part is that she's doing it and the narrative recognizes that! having friends and loved ones to help you out is actually a very essential part of happiness and survival!

and before i delve too far into my personal feelings, i also want to talk about a second thing here; i just find dot's characterization really relatable, like i swear to god there's someone on the writing team who must have been a 12 year old autistic NEET or something. it's literally too fucking on point, it's uncanny, i swear there's times in horizons where dot is just a carbon copy of me when i was a preteen. i mean come on:

dot flopping face down into bed after being overwhelmed in an awkward social situation and being confronted with a situation she's been trying to ignore thus far... the amount of times i have done this in my life, holy shit.

the candidness in which dot speaks about being so interested in the outside world, but being unable to have those experiences for herself as simply a voyeur. the shot of her room being such a disaster because she rarely leaves it and stuff piles up in there, including food junk,

the way she spends all this time alone cultivating skills she's passionate about and then shrugs them off as "just something she likes" when an adult compliments her on her abilities, the contrast between her confidence in what she loves but her complete social awkwardness in talking to anyone about it,

her defining herself on the internet by being a homebody, hell even her cute little freakout about the streamer she likes noticing something she said,

waking up late and missing the activities of other people because her sleep schedule basically doesn't exist while she's at home,

even just her general body language of closing in on herself and holding onto something when she's nervous, hell even her clothing choices which are so obviously meant to be as comfortable as possible for her and easy to take on and off - i could go on forever even just with this episode alone but i think you get the point. i feel so seen by how dot is just in general and it's obvious from both the plot/writing and the way dot is portrayed and animated that the people making this show understand people like me, even the type of person i was as a child, too.

all of this means so much to me because like i said in the intro to this post, i was and still very much am a social recluse. i'm a homebody. even now i still rarely leave my room, i don't eat with family often, i struggle to do things in the "real world". growing up, repeated intrusions into my feelings and my life did not help me, they only made me whiplash further into feeling distant and not listened to by the people around me. they made me want to interact with real life less. finally, as an adult, when people started to give me a bit more space, when the ways i communicate began to be respected a little more, that is when i started making genuinely close and good friendships, that is when i began to venture outside of my room and partake in small joys with people, as a direct result of being given the space and time to do so, to have my own autonomy, to make my own decisions, to be myself. i think it's incredibly easy to see someone curling in onto themself and assume they need a fuckton of intrusive pushing, and sometimes they do need a little push, like how dot's quaxly pushes her to move forward in the moment sometimes, or how liko continuously tried to befriend her, but the important part is that by treading too far over her boundaries it is no longer a productive or respectful way of helping her - it's a balance, and a balance horizons always seems to get right, episode 41 included.

it really means so much to me to see dot's journey into coming out of her shell treated with so much respect by the writing and other characters. so often recluse characters are the butt of the joke, are pushed out of their comfort zones unrealistically fast, or never actually receive the support and growth they need - but horizons strikes the balance of being candid about the type of character dot is and giving respect and space to her feelings so she can grow at her own pace, but still giving her support and little pushes when she needs them, and showing that it's possible to grow and enjoy the real world, even as a recluse. it's refreshing, especially with a character who is a child, and a girl, too! i can count the amount of times i have found a young girl character i relate to at all on one hand, and dot is the best one i've ever seen, personally! horizons has been really inspiring to me to continue to cultivate my connections with others and continue to drag myself out of my shell at my own pace with people who love me, during a really chaotic and transitional part of my life and i really love it for that. i'm glad this episode exists for an infinite multitude of reasons but i really just wanted to talk about this specific aspect for a bit and how it relates back to me as a recovering recluse.

thanks for reading if you got this far jesus christ i talk a lot LOOOL. and i might talk more about my feelings on this episode or dot in general later. i have so much to say about likodot and also about the family dynamics in this show i'm practically eating thru drywall thinking about it rn

#pokemon horizons #anipoke #pokeani #dot #trainer dot #dot pokemon #pokemon #pokemon horizons spoilers #anipoke spoilers #kiki was here #kiki.txt #this got personal but i didnt know how to talk about this episode without making it personal #you have no idea how hard i had to restrain myself from making this way too long #i have so much left to say... later #wink wink nudge nudge you should talk to me about horizons in my asks btw #horizons

[viviennelamb]

What do you think of astrology and energy healing practices like reiki? Love your blog btw. I don’t use tumblr anymore but I check your page every week. You’re great!

Thanks for reading, I'm glad you can get something out of my observations!!

Astrology groups people based on their date of birth to predict their interests, creating a mindset focused on "destiny." Astrology has the same premise as the MBTI and Enneagram and is only applicable to egotistical people. Astrology became public knowledge because people will subconsciously arrange themselves to fit into a label they think makes them “good” to garner a false sense of belonging. I have only read about my own zodiac, but it appeared to be a lust and consumerist forecast more than it was about "me." Personality typing is not about the individual Soul; it's yet another way to obtain the individual's ever-important attention. People who lack a sense of self take Astrology (and the like) very seriously, yet it provides no tangible value other than a temporary ego boost.

Those who understand what the Soul is do not see the supposed value in Astrology because the Soul has no birth or death date, so it is not applicable to those of Christ Consciousness or higher. Soul and Spirit are expressed in an infinite amount of ways, so it's more accurate to say Astrology is the study of the Ego because the False Self is predictable once you know what you're looking at - no need to study the stars, planets or time which are all false projections based on what the egotist's physical eyes perceive. When someone achieves Cosmic Consciousness, they gain control over their environment and awaken the all-seeing power of the Soul. She becomes aware of what she was all along: the Present Moment (and not a "past birthdate").

With Reiki, healing is 100% dependent on the thoughts of the practitioner. Body healing does work, but it depends on the consciousness of both parties. Someone with a purely destructive ego can be "healed" by someone who is materialistic like them, but less harmful. For example, a granola mom who is involved in the material world but practices mindfulness once a week if her husband and kids give her 10 minutes of solitude and silence. If this mother was a Reiki healer, she could bring the obligate narcissist to her level, but not past that.

Reiki may not have an effect on beings of higher consciousness as only a divine being, like God, possesses the power to heal them – the embodiment of purest purity. The effects of being healed do not last if the individual engages in the activity that got them sick. Ultimately, the individual must learn their karmic lesson, and heal themselves instead of relying on people who don't have the time or discipline to become a true healer and therefore do not know anything.

If you know anybody who's pure in thought, you feel at peace around them because they're the real healers. You don't need to meet a healer in person either, just perceiving their vibration whether it is in written, spoken or quiet in-person presence will be enough to incite positive change in the perceiver. This is why most people feel at ease around young children who haven't developed an ego yet. A child with an ego is highly disturbing, and this doesn't change when they turn 18... it's still disturbing.

As a child, my mother would come into my room and sit next to me for a few minutes and say, "Your room is so light, I feel better being in here." When I became a teenager, she said my room felt heavy and I felt hostile. My ego became so strong during high school that I couldn't sleep in my own room anymore. I had to move to the basement, but the same thing happened there too. I carried a black cloud of strife with me everywhere I went because my mind was caked with filth I didn't know how to detox. This went on to give me a lot of symptoms I won't get into, but nothing helped. False healers (including doctors, chiropractors, dietitians, coaches, therapists, dermatologists...) can only do so much (i.e. nothing). The "power of the mind" doesn't mean anything when the average person's mind is like an extreme hoarder's home and her prana is like an old phone battery that can only hold 20% of its charge.

An individual who engages in the lust thought or act cannot heal themselves or others which is why those seeking Reiki services need to know about the practitioner's personal life. A lot of them do drugs and participate in tantric orgies then clock into their clinics a few hours later on demon time with zero prana. Being a healer is a job that demands self-mastery as their thoughts can affect the quality of their work. This path is more difficult than being a surgeon where doctors can laugh in disgust over the patient's exposed organs or any other "difficult" job where people have coworkers helping them, vacations and a retirement plan. A certification isn't enough in this case; they need to be put under strict surveillance for five years to confirm that they are a healer.

The reason why Reiki is considered "dark" is because the unilluminated are drawn to "shortcuts" that are a waste of time (same with witchcraft and anything else like it). But what is also dark is to "just believe in Jesus and be saved" when it takes constant work to become and remain pure of mind. Cleansing the mind through scientific meditation will heal the steadfast meditator. There's no shortcut to Health or Wisdom; everybody must become disciplined, consistent and embody true love.

#astrology #reiki #meditation #kriya yoga #paramahansa yogananda #consciousness #non dualism #non duality #nonduality #nondualism #healing journey #healing #yoga #yogaeveryday

[jrhughes]

She Was Deceived, He Was Not!

(Sunday, February 26th 2023 A.D.)  

Genesis 3:1-24  

Message Text:     14 And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression.- 1st Timothy 2:14  

At the end of Chapter 2, we find man and his wife in a perfect environment. God had provided all that Adam and Eve could ever need. Life was good, very good and beautiful. But then was introduced the enemy of our souls and of God. The one and only evil personified, a former arch angel Lucifer had been cast out of his place because he wanted to be God. (Isaiah 14:12-14) Lucifer was cast out of the position of arch angel (Isaiah 14:15). Where did this evil personified one end up coming? (Ezekiel 28:13-17)  

13 Thou hast been in Eden the garden of God; every precious stone was thy covering, the sardius, topaz, and the diamond, the beryl, the onyx, and the jasper, the sapphire, the emerald, and the carbuncle, and gold: the workmanship of thy tabrets and of thy pipes was prepared in thee in the day that thou wast created.  14 Thou art the anointed cherub that covereth; and I have set thee so: thou wast upon the holy mountain of God; thou hast walked up and down in the midst of the stones of fire.  15 Thou wast perfect in thy ways from the day that thou wast created, till iniquity was found in thee.  16 By the multitude of thy merchandise they have filled the midst of thee with violence, and thou hast sinned: therefore I will cast thee as profane out of the mountain of God: and I will destroy thee, O covering cherub, from the midst of the stones of fire.  17 Thine heart was lifted up because of thy beauty, thou hast corrupted thy wisdom by reason of thy brightness: I will cast thee to the ground, I will lay thee before kings, that they may behold thee.  -Ezekiel 28:13-17  

This is the very sad story of the first real sin of mankind and it was not Eve taking the first bite of the forbidden fruit. WHAT?  You read that correctly: It was not Eve. That sin occurred as a result of the sin of Adam.  For centuries, most have blamed Eve and she did take the first bite of the forbidden fruit. However in her defense the devil, the father of lies, the fallen arch angel of heaven, deceived (beguiled) Eve. She was deceived.  

Yet, oh man of God, we have no such rationalization or excuse for the man, Adam (you are a “son” of Adam).  Adam was not deceived!   

Men we are not to emulate Adam, but to learn from Adam our shortcomings.   

Would we allow our wife (or family) to come under the influence of the devil? (Internet, TV?) What if we KNEW it was of the devil?  What if we were not deceived, but just allowed it to happen.  Some commentators tell us Adam was off somewhere. Oh, really, he would leave his beautiful wife and go where?  With whom? And what about verse six that says Adam was “with her”?  NO, friend Adam was without excuse.  He was the first sinner.  Adam did not protect the wife (Gift) God had given him. He allowed her to be deceived. HOW?  

Adam did not defend God when the devil (satan) called God a liar when the devil said, Ye shall not surely die. The devil was responding to Eve having said they were not to eat or touch the fruit of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.  The devil not only messed with his wife, the Gift of God, Adam also did not come to the defense of Eve or God when the devil made out that God was a liar.   

How about you, oh man of God? Do you protect your wife (or family) from the devil? (Internet, TV, Phone). Do you correct those who teach another gospel, another way?  LEARN HOW NOT TO BE LIKE ADAM.    

Message Text Genesis  - Chapter 3, Verses 1 - 24  

1 Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?  

1) Failure ~ In the Face of Evil: As we look in on Chapter 3, God provides Adam and Eve everything. Man is at peace with God. God loved him and met all man's needs. Adam is the ruler of all he sees on Earth and all of God's creation. There is no government “swamp” that hinders all persons no matter your party affiliation. No taxes. No bribes. No crime. Just Peace, Joy and Love and the knowledge of only the good. GOD.  

PARADISE GARDEN: Adam has, as his wife, the most beautiful woman in all the world, a direct creation by God, a gift from God. Man had all the land in the world. It was paid off and was not taxable, no school, property or sales taxes. His garden grows without thorns and thistles. On the property God has given him, is every fruit tree that exists and is good for food. There is a natural irrigation system for plants, by the rivers flowing past and through the Garden. The flies, ticks and mosquitos do not bite.  There is no crime. There is no sickness, disease or death. Animals have plenty and they feed and water themselves. No animal fears man, nor does man fear any animal. All in all, not bad. Not bad at all.  

REBELLION: But, we must realize man was not created, unable to sin. Man has the power, but not the right, to sin; not the authority to sin. Sin is rebellion against God. Man is able to make a decision; able to choose right or wrong, evil or good. How will man react when confronted with evil? Will he become righteous when faced with evil? Will he do right? Will he obey or disobey?  

Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And then, along comes the evil one. The devil was created as Lucifer, an angel of light, son of the morning, who wanted to be God (Isaiah 14:12-14). God cast him out of heaven. This son of the morning, angel of light, comes as a serpent creature into the garden. Ser pent (sûr"p…nt) n. 1. A reptile of the order Serpentes; a snake. 2. Often Serpent. a. The creature that tempted Eve. b. satan. The serpent (devil Revelation 12:9) could not have been the hissing evil treacherous, looking animal we see today. The evil one often transforms himself into an angel of light. (II Corinthians 11:14). The devil must have chosen a beautiful, likeable animal and wise animal (wise as a serpent Matthew 10:16), an animal that was friendly with Eve and Adam; one that communicated with man. Eve was a direct creation of God. She was not stupid or simple as Charles Darwin asserts in Descent of Man (1871, Chapter 19). She was intelligent.  

Yet, the devil was able to deceive Eve. The devil is shrewd to do evil. Adam, who is with her (Genesis 3:6) watches this all happen. Adam was not upset at the appearance of the evil one. We must realize how shrewd is he today with your Eve and you. Eve, you should insist upon the protection of your Adam. (And we know  Adam was not deceived,... 1st Timothy 2:14) If you are not careful, he will invade your mind and tell you the sin you want to do, is just not that bad.  After all God loves you and will forgive you. Go ahead, just this once. (Famous last words: just this once)  

Who was this serpent?  God says he was more subtil (subtle, shrewd, crafty). This was a very cunning, ingenious creature. Why else would the devil have chosen him? This animal was one man would accept in his garden and not be upset.  

A Talking Serpent? First the evil one tempts Eve by asking her a question? DOING WHAT?  TALKING TO HER? An animal talks!?! What is the reaction of Adam and Eve? Are they surprised? NO, not at all. Why? Is it because man and animal could communicate before the fall? All we know for certain is: it spoke and they did not seem to be surprised.  

Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden? The serpent asked, Hasn't God said you may eat of every (all) of the trees? Or was he really asking: Isn't it true God wants to restrict you from doing what you are fully able to do? Isn't that unfair of God?  If God did not say all of the trees, you should wonder why? Is God trying to restrict your full pleasure? Why? These are the things the evil one wants Eve to consider. And notice that the devil attacked the weaker of the two, but do not think for one second the devil did not know that he was going to use Eve to entice (lure, persuade) Adam to sin.  

Listen friend, the devil knew exactly what God said, so his is the perverted version of the word of God. The devil comes close, but only close enough to cause confusion and doubt. The devil wants to recruit you to be on his team. (Just this once, God should not mind.  God will forgive you... just this once).  

2 And the woman said unto the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden:  3 But of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die.  

The woman said unto the serpent. What does Eve answer? She may even begin in a rather defensive posture, defending God. However, we do not see or hear Adam.  Why? Is he enjoying seeing his wife being tempted? Why does Adam stand around? I know a man who told his wife to go ahead and go out with his best friend to lunch (just this once). After all had he not been a groomsman at their wedding? And their marriage was solid. They were in church and overtime, had, had three young children. It was just a friendly gesture. RESULT: DISASTER! Adultery, divorce!   What should my friend have done? He should have said, you know lunch is a good idea. Why don’t we get a sitter and all go to lunch later this week.  Also call up best man and say Friend, do not mess with my beautiful wife. Find your own wife.  

Are you desiring the mate of another? (Just this once)?   DISASTER awaits you!  

Adam should have stepped up to this talking serpent and begin to tell the evil one where to go. Since Adam was not deceived, we can find no reason for his reluctance to become involved. But Adam sits along side and watches the two of them.  What will be the result?  DISASTER!  

 We may eat of the fruit of the trees, ... but, the tree in the midst of the garden, God hath said.  Eve concedes there is one tree God has told us to leave alone as it will bring death. Eve replies we may eat (Hebrew=eat, devour, feed) of the fruit of the trees that are in the garden, but there is one tree that is in the middle of the garden that God (Elohiym) has told us not to eat of it; neither shall you touch  (Hebrew = touch, reach, strike) it, for if you do, you shall die. (Hebrew = die, kill, have one executed).  

Lest you die. Eve knew what God had said. The penalty for partaking of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil was DEATH. Some say Eve added to God’s word and it is not the same that was told to Adam at the first, but from where did she come up with her information? Was it when God was talking with them in the garden? We know God came to talk to them in the cool of the day (Genesis 3:8). Was the addition, something that Adam had added?  We just do not know. But all this time: Adam was not deceived.  

Again, we note Adam was with her (Genesis 3:6) and did not correct her or protect her. (Adam was not deceived,... 1st Timothy 2:14) Should Adam have defended Eve? What can you, man learn from this? Who is to be protector and Spiritual guide?  

4 And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die:  

The serpent said unto the woman. When the devil contradicts the Word of God, he blasphemes and calls God a liar. Who is the real Father of lies? Who is the father of all lies? Jesus tells us that the devil is a liar and murderer from the beginning (John 8:44). God hates lying (Prov. 6:16-17).  

Here in the Garden, the evil one lies and tells Eve, God is a liar. (The serpent is talking again and no one is astonished). The devil says, in effect, HEY! GOD IS LYING TO YOU. You won't die (Hebrew=be killed or executed)!  

But, God cannot lie (Numbers 23:19) Remember Adam was not deceived. Yet Adam stood by and allowed the father of lies to mess with his wife. WHAT A JERK!  

As God had preached to Adam, so satan now also preaches to Eve... The object of satan was to draw away Eve (to recruit her to be on his deadly, God hating team). By his lying words is his assault. The devil has challenged God and His Truth. Here, as far as we know, this and his recruiting speech to Eve, are the first uttered lies on Earth.  

Ye shall not surely die: THERE IT IS. A LIE is a prevarication, untruth, misrepresentation. Because of a lie that was not challenged by Adam, the first sin and the fall from a perfect environment where all needs were met and only good was known. From peace, joy, love and regular fellowship with God to a hostile, hate-filled evil world.  What we call the fall of man takes place (rebellion, sin).  

Some commentators (in an attempt to make Adam look good) contend that he was not here at the conversation, in the beginning. But that can only be asserted by wrestling with Scripture.  Genesis 3:6 says Eve gave also unto her husband with her) Where was Adam?  WITH HER.    

Do we (you) protect our wife from sin, by challenging all lies told to her in our presence?  (And Adam was not deceived,... 1st Timothy 2:14) Note: But, when obeying God rather than man, deceiving seems to be allowed (Rahab lies to protect the spies.) But the last word in the Bible on lying is: all liars shall have their part in the lake of fire. (Rev. 21:8). Those who continue and love lying are lost, They have no right to the tree of life. (Rev. 22:14-15)  

5 For God doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil.  

For God doth know... This all knowing God does know exactly what will happen to man. Man (male and female created He them) will experience immediate Spiritual death.  And being cut off from the tree of life, man will eventually die a physical death. But that is not what the devil warns. NO.  

ye shall be as gods. Devil you are such a liar. But apparently a very convincing liar: some of the angels joined you in rebellion against God. And here this sweet and innocent woman is being asked to partake in sin, to become another recruit for the devil. What a HUUUGE LIE!  

Where did this desire to be as God emanate? The devil, wished to replace God (Isaiah 14:12-14). A paraphrase of the devil is this: NO! WHAT GOD FEARS is that YOU will become gods (gods Hebrew= become Divine: rulers). They will be rulers?  

WAIT, THINK, God already made man ruler of Earth. They were not God, but were God's direct agents, they were rulers. Yet, neither Adam nor Eve defends God. -How about you?- How often do you defend or fail to defend God? Not that God needs your defense, BUT you need to defend Him, for your own GOOD and so you will know on whose side you are.  

Is God; good?  Either God is good and right and wants what is best for you or God is evil. WHAT WILL YOU CHOOSE?  The devil wants you on his team. If you agree with the devil, do not defend God. After all, if the devil speaks the truth, God is not your Friend. God is not your Provider and Sustainer.  

However, if you correctly believe that God would never lie, that God is our Creator, that in God we live and move and have our being; if HE is also the Preserver of all mankind; if HE is your Friend, One who sticketh closer than a brother, if HE is the One Who died in your place, Who paid your death penalty and offered you a ‘legal pardon' (greater Love hath no man than to lay down His life -St. John 15:13) and if HE has gone to prepare a place for you that where He is, there you may be also (John 14:1-3) then you need to defend HIM.  CHOSE GOD. SERVE HIM.  DEFEND HIM.  

You need to declare, how Good, how Great, how Wonderful is our God.  

We either join the devil and want to be gods or we acknowledge that God Only is God. We are to fear (reverence, respect, worship) God and keep all of His commandments, for this is the whole duty of man. (Ecclesiastes 12:13).  

Some claim this Chapter 3 is an allegory, but if they are Christians what do they do with the writing of the apostle Paul, who says (2 Corinthians 11:3: But I fear, lest by any means, as the serpent beguiled Eve through his subtilty, so your minds should be corrupted from the simplicity that is in Christ.) He writing under the influence of God the Holy Spirit (Holy Ghost), Who here in 2 Corinthians, New Testament, affirms the serpent beguiled (fooled, charmed, bewitched) Eve.  

6 And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.  

The woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise. WOW! She looks at the tree. Now, I assume the evil one waited until they were in the vicinity of the tree so they could see it,  before he tempted her. I do not believe the woman and her husband had to walk any great distance to see it. She looked at the tree, which God said was not to be eaten. The consequence of eating it was death. She is listening to this false angel of light figure in a talking-animal. She is being tempted to sin.  

She sees a tree. It is good (pleasant and agreeable) and pleasant (desirable) to her eyes. She may think, ‘Will my eyes be opened?' Now Eve begins concluding it is a tree to be desired (coveted after) to make wise (prudent and understanding). Would she have new knowledge? Would she have the wisdom of this world? (1st Cor. 3:18-20)  Would she become a god?  

What do her eyes behold as she looks on this forbidden (to eat) fruit tree? Her eyes are deceiving her.  She has apparently already believed the devil. Eve thinks this forbidden fruit is good. (Valid; legally firm; not weak or defective; having strength adequate to its support; as a good title; a good deed; a good claim. - Yet peradventure for a good man some would  even dare to die. Romans 5:7.- Webster 1828 )  

It was good for food (1. In a general sense, whatever is eaten by animals for nourishment, and whatever supplies nutriment to plants.  2. Meat; aliment; flesh or vegetables eaten for sustaining human life; victuals; provisions; whatever is or may be eaten for nourishment.) - Webster 1828  

She took of the fruit thereof, and did eat. Eve was sold. She had been recruited, by lies of the worst kind, lies that declared God out to be a liar. Yet, she was beguiled, deceived, bewitched. Eve took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, thus consummating sin. (14 But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. 15 Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.- James 1:14-15) ...   But Brother Hughes it is “just this once.”  

WHERE IS ADAM?  Adam was not deceived.  

And gave also unto her husband with her.  Adam was not deceived. For the first time Adam is announced as her husband. What is the significance of that? Is it like when we see a man who supposedly got saved last week, but we see him drunk and drinking? One man says to the evangelist: Look there is one of your converts. To which the evangelist replies, He must be one of my converts because if was a true convert of God, he would not be in such a sad situation.   

Was Adam now acting as a husband of Eve and not a son of God? And for those who want to give Adam a pass: he was off somewhere tending to the Garden: Read it, the Bible says her husband was with her. Eve was to be as a helpmeet for him. And we could here raise up our holy stance and say: Eve destroyed Adam and the perfect environment of Eden. Poor Adam, poor, poor Adam. Adam was not deceived.  

And he did eat, and so involved himself in the criminality of the acts of joining team devil. But likewise as Eve was being "persuaded by Satan's impostures," Adam was not deceived. Scriptures speak of Adam as the chief transgressor (Romans 5:12; 1 Corinthians 15:21, 22).  

And he did eat! Okay what does Eve (and Adam who was with her) do? (And Adam was not deceived,... 1st Timothy 2:14). Suddenly, she yields to temptation. She takes the fruit. She is deceived and does not realize the gravity of her sin. WAIT! Adam is not deceived (I Timothy 2:14). Will not Adam come like the ‘Lone Ranger' in days of old (or ‘Cavalry') to her rescue. (Hi-Ho Silver!)  

BUT NO!  He stands there. He allows her to eat (Hebrew =eat, consume, devour) Why? And why do we desire the forbidden? (Porn industry, prostitution, dangerous or fattening, neighbors wife/husband, new car, nice things, wealth without working. Do you play the lottery? Just this once. Will you be with your friend’s wife for lunch, just this once?  

And I cannot imagine how Adam had come to disregard Eve so much that Adam allowed her to take the first bite of the forbidden fruit, which God had told him would bring forth death (Genesis 2:17). Why would this husband allow his wife to take of the fruit and perhaps drop over dead? (And Adam was not deceived,... 1st Timothy 2:14) Aren't we sorry that we were not Adam? Surely "I" would have protected my wife. (We are but a bad copy of a bad copy of a bad copy of Adam. Only with God’s power can you find the way of escape.)  

1 Corinthians 10:13 King James Version 13 There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, Who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.  

Going, GOING, ...         But the sin is not yet completed.  

Eve gave to her husband Adam (who was not deceived). Okay here is where Adam will rescue Eve. Adam knows this is sin. He will refuse, and by his actions will redeem Eve from sin (if that be possible). NOPE!  

The big man sees the fruit, opens his mouth (not to speak and command the evil one to go); Adam opens his mouth to participate in the sin. And he did eat. Now the sin is complete. What are the results of sin when it is complete?  

DEATH! (Separation from God)  

What are the three deaths?  Spiritual Death, Physical Death, Eternal Death! This act brought forth immediate Spiritual Death. That led to Physical Death and if you (and I) do not resist the evil one, if we join his team and never leave it, you (or I) will end up in the torments of hell.   

King James Bible. And he (the recently dead rich man) cried and said, Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus, that he may dip the tip of his finger in water, and cool my tongue; for I am tormented in this flame. - Luke 16:24  

9 And another angel, a third, followed them, saying with a loud voice, “If anyone worships the beast and its image and receives a mark on his forehead or on his hand, 10 he also will drink the wine of God’s wrath, poured full strength into the cup of His anger, and he will be tormented with fire and sulphur in the presence of the holy angels and in the presence of the Lamb. 11 And the smoke of their torment goes up for ever and ever, and they have no rest, day or night, these worshippers of the beast and its image, and whoever receives the mark of its name.” - Revelation 14:9-11  

7 And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons.  

The eyes of them both were opened, and they knew they were naked. They were naked before each other and naked before God. They had sinned (disobeyed). Did they now realize the foolishness of their actions?  What to do?  

‘OH! I have a great idea,' man thought. ‘Let us hide our sin.' ‘Let us cover over that which tells us we are sinners.' ‘Let us make it right.' ‘Let us redeem ourselves'. So they took fig leaves and they sewed fig leaves together and made aprons. (Well there goes the false idea of a stone age, where men did not know how to use tools. Here Adam and Eve are sewing ~using tools).  

they sewed fig leaves together. I will make myself right before God. They had looked with their eyes. Our eyes often get us into trouble yet today. (Television,  internet, books, magazines, a new car, or combine, a shapely woman, a hunk). If thine eye offends thee, pluck it out ... rather than... be cast into hell fire. (Matthew 18:9) Suddenly, they both realized their sin. Shame had entered the world. Their understanding and eyes were opened.  

It is bad to sin, but not totally bad to know your sin. It is how you deal with it. Do you confess and forsake your sin striving to never do it again? (1st John 1:9)  

OR do you say, well, we all sin, God expects it, so we will continue in our sin?  

Just this once...  

Which is the proper attitude? Jesus warns us to repent or perish. (Luke 13:2-5) Here we see innocence lost. They knew (Hebrew= perceived, learned, discerned) and now they understood they were naked (nude, exposed, stripped).  

I will make ME right, cover sin and shame. When sin is exposed we find our first Earthly parents tried to "cover it" (their nakedness with leaves). Some commentators believe Adam and Eve were at creation clothed with THE righteousness of God, in the form of light (perhaps as the transfigured Christ and His Face did shine and His raiment was white as the light. Matthew 17:2). If that is true, then the covering of righteousness was gone also.  

They disobeyed God (that is sin). The childlike wonder for his wife (and Eve for her husband's body) was broken. The innocence of being created (without knowing evil) was gone. They knew good from God BUT now also knew evil from the devil.  

They made aprons (Hebrew=girdles, belts, loin cloths) of the leaves of a fig tree to cover those parts of difference, those parts meant by God for good, for the procreation and pleasure of the man and his wife and for the filling of the Earth with images of God. (Genesis 1:26-28)  

But without shedding of blood is no remission of sin. (Hebrews 9:22) Man's best efforts, man's solution, ...cover what now had been exposed. and then . . . (read Genesis 3:8)  

Prayer: Father God, I know You love me.  But I must confess that I do not understand that wonderful agape love. I do desire it and I do accept it.  I need You every hour, every minute, every second, every nano second. Please never leave me nor forsake me. I need Your strength to resist the temptation that is before me. Yes, I am confident that You will forgive me. BUT, I do not know why. Also, I do not want to be recruited by the devil. I do not even want to hear from him. He is a liar.  He is the prince of just this once. I now reject him and in Your Name, Lord Jesus, I cast him out from me and ask You to make it so he never, ever returns or exercises authority over me, ever again.  I want to be Your child. I want to be more like Jesus. HELP ME, I pray. Make me into the person that You want me to be. No fig leaves, no aprons. Please forgive me for all my sins and unrighteous thoughts, speech, ideas and deeds, I pray in the Mighty Powerful, Wonderful Name of Jesus Christ, our Lord.  Amen and amen  

May God bless you in all that you do for Him, Brother J.R. Soul winner, Bible teacher, Defender of the Faith

[humansun]

4am thoughts after a long long shoot day

Written August 31st, 2022 at 4:10AM

I have been up since 7am, and I have to be up in 5 hours. Most likely less after writing this, but it’s cathartic, so it’s worth it. Although I haven’t been writing consistently, I’ve learned that the true meaning of loving yourself includes giving yourself grace for all the times you are not consistent with meditation, writing, reading, and all the things you’ve once been committed to. Life has its ebbs and flows, and I’m grateful to let myself be human.

I have so many thoughts that I cannot go to sleep without writing at least a bit about what I’m feeling. Being in a collaborative environment with positive and kind people always puts me in the best mood. I have been blessed with the opportunity to work with Elizabeth Ai, someone who inspires me and someone who I truly look up to. She has given me such a wonderful opportunity to be on set and to work so closely with folks who handle cameras. Although I did have a bit of that at Disney, it doesn’t feel the same as those who begin from the grassroots.

Biggest win of today is not tangible, which is the best types of wins: emotional observation, which led to emotional control. I noticed myself feeling some type of way - wishing certain folks would like me, feeling like I wasn’t good enough or valued enough (which is valid), and feeling like everyone else was better than me. But! The best part of all of this was me giving myself the mental space to understand it (and maybe not because of compartmentalization) and also observe it in my own head.

It’s not that my feelings are ever truly irrational, but its that they may not serve me well in that moment or those around me. So what should I do in order to make my emotions serve me? Watch them in my own mind and try to give myself answers to them before reacting, you know? This was a huge win for me, and I want to keep this in mind for future experiences in order to keep myself in line and prevent any emotional disasters occurring because of the heightened moments of the work we do.

People are not often what you see on the outside. The small interactions I’ve had with the crew members on Zoom do not compare to the interactions I’ve had in person with each person on the team. Every individual has a beautiful and wild story that I love hearing about, wisdom that I can always learn from, and knowledge that makes the whole set come together to create something beautiful.

I really believe in this project and I can’t wait to see what comes of it. Most of all, what I feel in this moment is gratitude. I feel happy and light that I was able to work with these incredible folks - Ash, May, Rachel, So, Mena, Sam, Elizabeth - all the folks who were so quick to put a smile to my face and heart. I hope to continue to help spread positive light to those who need it and those who give that to me as well.

In terms of what I learned today for hard skills, I witnessed so much beauty in the craft of production and the entire process of film. It all makes more sense now for how tasks get done and how quick and efficiently each crew member needs to move on set. The most important thing to me is that everyone arrives safely, completes their task safely, takes care of themselves, wrap safely, and drive home safe as well. That to me is already a super successful set.

We as humans get really excited and entrenched in what our tasks are in our little world, but we forget how mortal we are in every moment and every day. I appreciate the opportunity period, because it gives me so much slide room for Vietnam and I cannot wait to embark on a beautiful journey that will fill my heart with so much love.

Another lesson - meditation: always do so first thing in the morning if you feel like you need it, because more often than not, you will not get to it if you pass on the opportunity. I learn this the hard way, every, single, time.

To wrap up, since we’re coming to almost 4:30AM, I want to say that I am extremely grateful to be back home safely and to be able to write all of my feelings on a digital platform. I’m grateful to have amazing people in my life who look out for me and are willing to be vulnerable. I’m grateful to be myself. I’m grateful to have my parents and grandmamas in my life. I love all my friends so deeply and truly. I can’t wait to continue living and I want to always remind myself that I can throw myself a jetpack when it gets low and bounce back, whoa. :) <3 

Good night and thank you! 

[c-is-for-circinate]

As promised: let's talk Hades, and how acts of abuse can create toxic environments for everyone around them, and also how people react to those environments--and to them being disrupted.

(For reference, I have just kicked Theseus's ass for the first time, it was exactly as satisfying as it was intended to be, and then I got predictably slaughtered a couple of chambers into Styx. Spoilers for everything through that point, but please no spoilers in reblogs/comments for anything after that!) Also, TW for a whole lot of discussion of abuse, particularly verbal and emotional abuse, and abusive familyworkplace dynamics.

Okay, so. To start out with, Hades is an abusive parent. He engages in innumerable acts of verbal and emotional abuse towards his son, because yep, that's what you call it when a parent constantly berates and belittles their kid for every perceived failure, including the ones the parent themselves could have prevented. Sometimes especially the ones the parent could have prevented. Zagreus failed at his office clerk job because Hades refused to teach him how to do it and then blamed him for not already knowing how. Cerberus tore up the lounge because Hades, who was actually there, chose not to stop him. Hades created, possibly deliberately, and then took full advantage of every opportunity he saw to insult and demean his kid, and the clerk job flashback shows us that he was doing so even before the escape attempts started. I'm pretty sure we're all on the same page here, but: yep, that all constitutes abuse, even if they're gods. Even if Hades has reasons for Being Like That. Even if you think Zagreus seems okay and unharmed by it (which: repeatedly throwing yourself into a gauntlet of violence that inevitably ends in your own pain and death because you're so desperate to escape home, not actually an indicator of someone who's okay). We all good on that?

Cool. Because I'm not really here to talk about how Hades' abuse directly impacts Zagreus right now (although there's for sure an essay in that too). I'm thinking about how it impacts everybody else.

Hades isn't as obviously unreasonable with anybody else in his kingdom the way he is with his kid. When we see him lecture somebody else, it's usually for an actual failure to do their job: Hypnos for literally falling asleep on the job and not doing anything that was assigned to him, Megaera for letting us past her so many time, Orpheus for being a court bard who refuses to sing. His attitude is super confrontational and unpleasant, but on the surface it doesn't necessarily look as fucked-up. Thing is, though, whether any individual act of aggression towards an employee/family member is justified or not (I would generally argue 'not', because aggression towards employees/family members is, y'know, not justifiable)--it's not about the individual acts. It's about the entire cultivated atmosphere of toxicity and abuse.

One of the very first things Meg ever says to us is, "I'd rather be on your bad side than his." Up until that point, we've got no reason to believe Meg has any history whatsoever of fucking up at her job. In fact, we've got plenty of reason to believe she's good at it. She's fiercely proud of it, she's frequently Employee Of The [Time Period], and we've apparently never even met her sisters because she handles her shit herself. But she's still scared of Hades. Dusa, who is an anxious wreck at all times because oh god what if she gets fired what if she gets fired what if she gets fired, in spite of apparently being absolutely exemplary at her job, is scared of Hades. Every single shade in the Hall is clearly terrified of Hades, and it's not because of what he's done to each of them. It's what they've seen him do to other people.

Which is how toxic environments work, whether they're work environments or families. The Court of Hades is of course both, always, with the bonus hell layer of you can't quit even if you DIE. An abuser in authority doesn't have to target you in order to make you feel scared, cowed, and desperate to please them. Humans (and gods who are basically extra-powerful humans) are good at learning by example. The residents of the Court get the picture.

So this Court is a minefield--and everyone except Zagreus is very good at tiptoeing around mines. We see it in Meg, so desperate to do her job well. We see that Hypnos very clearly does not give a shit about anything, but he still makes sure to have a list of excuses ready if/when Hades ever confronts him about failure to do his job, just in case. We see it when Achilles tells us that my ability to help you is constrained by the authority your father gives me, or whatever the line was sixty runs ago when he couldn't let me into locked chambers. The system, such as it is, works, and if Nyx talks to Hades as little as possible, if Thanatos avoids the Court entirely, if Achilles treads very carefully and knows how to keep his head down--well that's just the system, right? That's just how things are.

Even Zagreus seems to have had a role in that system as the court fuckup. He's the kid who didn't have a real job or purpose. He could take the focus of Hades' generalized, day-to-day ire off of everyone else, without triggering some of the more direct and violent ire because the work he was doing didn't really matter (a LOT of Hades' rage-triggers seem to be related to job performance, which means that the people with real jobs are of course the most at risk). And he could do so "safely" (big emphasis on the quotation marks there) because he alone of the court is Hades' actual kid, who's Prince of the Underworld no matter how much he fucks up. If one of Nyx's other kids gets something really really wrong, she might be able to protect them from some consequences, but Hades doesn't have any layer of supposed parental affection holding him back from getting violently furious about it. Zagreus gets a nice bedroom and the abuse is limited to words rather than divine power, and Hades is a dick to everyone but he only occasionally condemns people to eternities of torture, and only for good reasons like refusing to sing when your job is to be court bard, so it's fine, everybody's fine, everything's totally fine, right?

Except it's not fine when everybody is so clearly worried about anything going wrong. And it's especially not fine for Zagreus, who's the person to finally say no. He's leaving, for his own sake, because he deserves better and he's finally convinced he can have it. And that turns the whole system into disarray.

I am endlessly fascinated by the ways this game portrays different characters reacting to this upheaval in their carefully-mapped minefield. It's different for authority figures and peers and servants, different based on how people are positioned in the house under Hades' rule, and it's so spot-on and I love it.

Nyx, for instance, is absolutely calm about the whole thing, because Nyx has power. Hades can't hurt her. Hades can't even really do much against her children, not when Hypnos and Thanatos are gods in their own right. Yes, Hades rules the kingdom, but Nyx owns the land, and she gives no shits about his rages. And it's interesting, too, to see the lines she doesn't draw. The deal seems to be that Hades doesn't fuck with her, and doesn't outright threaten her kids (because Hypnos is bad at his job, demonstrably so, and Hades hasn't ruined him yet), and she doesn't interfere with the way he treats the people around him. She gives Zagreus advice and support and the mirror, but she also doesn't take a direct stand against Hades. He can't hurt her, but he could make life...difficult. She's protected, her position in the minefield is more of a safe viewing platform than slogging through the middle of it, but the mines are still there.

And then we have Achilles, who is one of my favorite characters in the whole game because of how he reacts to this whole situation. Achilles, like Nyx, is so supportive. Every single time you see him he has something encouraging to say. He gives us his Codex, secretly finds us weapons, trained us for years, clearly wants us to succeed. And still he's limited, not necessarily out of fear for himself (though he has to be scared for himself, he knows what Hades does to people who anger him), but out of concern that if he gives Zagreus too much help in one way, he won't be able to provide help at all later. He's still so careful.

Achilles and Nyx are so fucking important to this story because they're the only authority figures Zagreus really has in his life except for his father, and they are so supportive. They're what keep this story from being a nightmare of psychological horror and depression. They can't stop the pressure from Hades and this life in his house being miserable for Zag, but they can give us hope, remind us that Zagreus is still loved. And they have such an incredibly important role when it comes to guilt, which is one of the biggest ways toxic systems maintain themselves.

If Zagreus leaves, what happens to everybody else? Who takes Hades' wrath then? Who becomes court scapegoat if he's not there, and also, who gets punished for his escape? These questions matter, and we see him worry about it! He asks Nyx and Achilles both, is it going to be okay that you're helping me, are you going to be alright, will my father hurt you for this? And they are both so firm about telling him no. No, I will be fine. See, here's the list of reasons about why I'm going to be fine, why my position in this minefield is secure. They make a point of telling us that it's fine, that we do not need to hold ourself back from getting out of this abusive situation for their sake. That is instrumental in Zagreus's ability to keep making these escape attempts without feeling too guilty and worried and selfish to go on. (Another thing that's actually really important in setting up that dynamic--we see that Hades cares about Cerberus, even if he's using him as a pawn against us, and Cerberus seems to be the one figure in court who Hades doesn't get mad at. The dog isn't at risk, and that is really essential in keeping the story from getting too grim.) These people who we care about refuse to let themselves be held hostage to secure our good behavior.

It's also really useful for raising the stakes later in the story--we see Hades arguing with Nyx once or twice, and we see Zagreus feeling guilty about it, but it's also a sign that we're making enough progress to piss him off. After I finally made it out of Elysium on my last run, I came home to find him furious with Achilles in a way that actually makes me nervous, because Achilles does not have nearly as much security in his position as he says he does. (Achilles is such a good teacher/authority figure, because he knows goddamn well what Hades could do to him, and still refuses to let fear for his own situation stop him from helping the abused kid under his care escape his. And no, not everybody has the capacity to do that, but it matters so much coming from the guy who helped raise us. It matters so much. I do not even have the words for how much.)

It's also no mistake that many of the people we find supporting us along our journey are either the people with the most power in their immediate environment, or the least. Sisyphus helps us because what more could they do to me than this? Orpheus is a little wild around the eyes and somewhat disconnected from reality, and he wishes us the best because someone should get what they want and also he no longer gives a single fuck what happens to him. Eurydice has her own cozy little corner of Asphodel, as safe from Hades' rage as anybody anywhere in his realm because she's tucked in such an out-of-the-way middle place she's outside his notice. Dusa is so scared of everything anyway that, crush aside, she isn't any more threatened by us escaping than she is just by her everyday life here. Charon is unfathomable and unstoppable; Skelly literally exists to be a punching bag, and yet he also seems basically immune to pain, no matter what we do to him. There's no threat from Hades there.

So the people most at risk when I flip the world on its ear are the ones who have so much standing that they have something to lose, but not enough to protect them from losing it. Which of course brings us to Than and Meg--who are, of course, the two people who also seem by far the most upset by my attempts to leave.

As authority figures, Nyx and Achilles are constantly reinforcing the message that it's Hades' fault, not ours, if they or anybody else get caught in the crossfire of his wrath. I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing, and it's not my guilt to bear. From Megaera and Thanatos, we get the opposite message--I am fucking with things, I am hurting people, and I need to stop. Zagreus isn't just abandoning them, as a friend or brother or lover or all of the above they're Greek gods who even knows. He's betraying them. They were in this together, as friends or lovers or whatever, but now Zagreus is sending earthquakes through the minefield they both still have to stand in. He is about to capsize this boat in the middle of a thunderstorm, he is fucking with the system, and they're the ones who are going to get most hurt.

I'm so curious how this is going to work for Than, who out of everyone we meet holds the closest role to Nyx's in terms of being sheltered from Hades' wrath. He's the guy who gets to leave, after all, even though he always has to come back. I've seen the least of him out of anybody so far because it took forever for me to get to Elysium, but two things really stand out and I'm so interested to see where they go. One, he really genuinely does care about Zagreus. He wants us safe, he wants us unhurt, the accessory he gives us only grants its bonus if we clear a room without taking injury, he keeps showing up to help. And two, he wants us to give up and go back and recognize how good we had it. Which is SO fucking interesting, considering how miserable Zagreus so clearly was, and how legitimate his reasons for being miserable were.

It makes me wonder so much about Than's standards for comparison. Does he know something we don't about what's waiting for us on the surface, something that might theoretically hurt Zagreus even more than staying down below? Has his life, which apparently allows him more freedom than anybody else in the Court, sucked horribly in ways we haven't seen, and that's why he spends so little time there in the first place? Either of those things is plausible, both of those things are plausible, and yet either one leads to this sense of patronizing, because he refuses to simply tell us. If something terrible is awaiting us, don't give us vague warnings, tell us what it is and let us decide for ourself! If you're fucking jealous because we might get out entirely and you're still stuck coming back here, say so. If you're worried about your mom--and he does bring her up, how could Zagreus turn his back on her like that, does seem to worry for her--then let's have an actual conversation about how many times she has insisted I do this and also how much I love her.

And, right, it's clear that a lot of Thanatos being upset is simply, you were going to leave me without even saying goodbye, you want to leave ME, which is understandable! But, like, he is demonstrably the one god who gets to visit the surface. He's the one person we actually COULD expect to see again. And he is absolutely also upset because there's an Order To Things, and we're fucking it up. We used to be his careless callow reckless friend who could talk back to Hades and get away with it, and now we're not, and everything is changing and we might leave him altogether, and we might leave him alone in that court without us, and he hates it.

Is it a short-sighted, selfish fear on his part? Yes, absolutely. Even if he's not scared of Hades on his own behalf, he is still frightened by what happens if we upset this system--and maybe it's the sanctity of a much bigger system than the Underworld that he's worried about! Maybe it's the whole divine and cosmic order. Whatever system he wants so badly to protect is enabling the abuse Zagreus has been dealing with for however-long he's been alive. Whatever system he wants so badly to protect OUGHT to be overturned, or at least shaken up. But this is what toxic systems DO. They convince the people within them that they have to be maintained, that a broken system that hurts the people within it is far better than no system at all, that changing the world is too scary and too dangerous. And Thanatos wants his whatever-Zagreus-is-to-him to be there, because he loves him and also because that's how the world works, and those things are all tangled up in one another, and that is how relationships are in a messed-up family like this so therefore I love it.

And Meg. Meg, the best for last, my dear, beautiful, furious, bitter, scared angry tired girl. I adore her. I am absolutely never going to date her, because the thing Zagreus needs most in his life hurts her, more directly than anybody else in the story, and that sucks, and it's not Zag's fault but they still shouldn't be together. Meg has taken more injury from this situation than anyone, quite literally as well as metaphorically, and it's not her fault any more than it's ours, but oh boy it has made her lash out and it's awful and it's perfect.

Meg's place in the Court of Hades is unique because she's not dead, not a mortal, not anything other than a god--but she's also not family. Nyx is not her mother. She's very much part of this system, she and her two sisters belong to Hades-the-realm and therefore also Hades-the-king, she can't leave, but she also doesn't have that protection of Nyx watching out for her in the same way. She's not royalty. She and her sisters (if you ask Hesiod instead of Virgil, which seems to be the interpretation the game's going with here) sprang from the blood of maimed Uranus at the same time as Aphrodite, but fuck knows Aphrodite isn't claiming them as siblings. And she can't be fired, exactly, but she sure can be demoted, and she sure can be made miserable in her job. Meg is vulnerable in a way very few people in Hades' employ are. She's a lot harder to do away with than any one random shade, but she's also a lot harder to miss blending in with a crowd.

What's more, she's the one person in this whole mess who is specifically tasked with stopping us from leaving. Hypnos isn't ordered to put us to sleep and keep us in our room. Thanatos can't be compelled or punished if he doesn't hunt us down. Achilles isn't told to lock us up and keep the keys. Meg is the one stationed at the doorway to Tartarus to keep us in. Meg is the one who gets in trouble when we leave. Meg (who Hades knows goddamn well Zagreus cares for, or cared for, who he absolutely knows we used to date) is the one who has to fight us again and again and again. And she's the one who keeps dying.

Again, it's this incredibly fucked-up guilt/hostage situation deliberately designed to keep people from fleeing abusive situations. Meg's insistence on fighting us now puts Zagreus in the position of having to hurt her himself again and again. Now suddenly we're the ones sticking a sword in our ex-girlfriend. Now suddenly someone can point to our desire to leave, to flee, to escape, and say, how selfish. How cruel. How terrible of us to want to go, when we're even willing to hurt the people we love to do it.

Except, right: Hades is the one who demands Meg stand there and stop us. Hades is the one who puts both of us in that position. Meg is also in an abusive situation, and she's willing to hurt us to protect herself. "I'd rather be on your bad side than your father's." It's easy to blame her at the start for being complicit, for being a tool of our father's abuse, for being on his side. It gets harder as the game goes on. I've killed her so many times. There's no way for her to beat me. She knows at this point that she can't beat me. She still fights, every single time, still throws herself upon that spike, not because she thinks she has any chance of stopping me but because she is so damn scared of what will happen if she doesn't try.

In fact, Meg's the one person we have actually seen face consequences for our actions so far, instead of just facing the threat of them. Her sisters are here. Her sisters, who she clearly does not want here, who are wild and violent and who she does not want in her life or anywhere near her, let alone near the job she takes so much pride in. She gets to deal with them now. (Hades doesn't have to deal with them. They're still not allowed in his court. But Meg does.) She gets stabbed, and bludgeoned, and shot, and lightning-struck, and poisoned, and every other thing we do to her. Thanatos doesn't. Nyx and Achilles and Hypnos don't. Bug Meg? Oh yes. Meg pays.

And yes, ok, she is complicit in this system. Everybody is complicit in this system. Zagreus who's trying to escape on his own behalf instead of overthrowing his father for the sake of everyone he'd otherwise be leaving behind is complicit in this system. Pointing fingers and pulling strings of who's more at fault? and who do we blame for this? is exactly how this sort of system perpetuates itself. Your sister always talked back at the dinner table and put everyone in an even worse and more violent mood. Your coworker refuses to work more than forty hours a week so now you have to take overtime to pick up their slack. You're enabling your dad by asking your sister to shut up, you're enabling your employer by working as hard as you do so you don't get fired, everyone's at fault, everyone's to blame, everyone is--

It's not everyone. It's Hades. It's Hades at the root of everything, and probably something big and institutional and fucked-up even beyond him. But even if everyone down in this Underworld does have to be trapped here forever, even if he's trapped here forever, Hades is neither challenging the system that put them here nor trying to make that fate better for anyone else stuck with him. He's just created an entire kingdom of backbiting and misery and people who can either go along with his whims or suffer the consequences.

At this point in the game, Meg is so fucking tired. Every time we run into her in the lounge, hunched over a table, the venom in her voice when she tells us "Do I look like I have anything to say to you?" is so bitter and so exhausted. There was a system, and she knew her place in the system, and it was a system divinely ordered by the gods themselves, and sure it was cruel but that's the literal will of the universe as far as she knows it. She had a role, and her role was vengeance and punishment and violence against those who'd committed the most egregious of sins in life, and there was a point to it, she was the divine deterrent to convince people not to do those things, and that was just, and that was right. The GODS THEMSELVES said so. How do you argue with that? You can't possibly argue with that!

And Zagreus is arguing with that. In trying to leave, he's questioning the unbreakable rule that nothing in the Underworld ever gets to leave it. In disobeying his father to do so, he's questioning the unbreakable rule that what the gods say is LAW. He's breaking everything.

And of course he's not trying to do any of that. He's not trying to destabilize the system at all. He's just trying to get himself out of it, to a place where he feels like he belongs and maybe a parent who's slightly nicer to him than this one. But toxic systems like this one break when the people within them have access to another option. When the kids find a way to actually leave, and not answer the phone, and not come home for holidays, and not deal with it any more. When the employees have the economic freedom to quit. When opportunities granted by education, money, social support, etc etc etc, show up and give people a choice. Even if the option is only ever for Zagreus--he's demonstrating that an option exists. Which is, of course, the one thing the system cannot ever allow.

I really like this game.

#hades game #hades spoilers #C plays stuff #driveby meta attack

[therenlover]

The Boy With The Easel (A Young Artist!Helmut Zemo x Reader Oneshot)

(Hey! If you end up enjoying this fic, it’s the first chronological part of a new fun expanded AU I’ve created with @creme-bruhlee​! Their fic Bliss is part of the same timeline and takes place about a year after this one, so you should check it out!!!)

Synopsis: About a month into your first semester at Novi Grad’s top university, you finally meet the strange young man that you’ve taken to calling “easel boy” in the back of a bookshop. From a distance, he always seemed cold and aloof. As you get to know him, though, you realize things aren’t always what they seem.

Tags: Meet Cute, College AU, First Meetings, Coffee Date, Artist!Zemo, Embarrassment, Awkward College Kids Falling In Love

Rating: T

Warnings: Very Vague Mention of Sexual Content, Swearing, Zemo Says The Word Daddy In Reference To His Father and The Reader Thinks It’s Kinda Hot

Word Count: 7000~

This fic has been crossposted to my AO3!

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                                    The University of Novi Grad

                                                 Fall 1996

Mornings in Novi Grad could be beautiful if you knew what to look for.

Sokovia was… different from America in many ways. From the language to the scenery, you often found yourself adrift in the strangeness of it all. There had been nothing quite as old as the buildings in the historical district of Novi Grad back home, no towering grey behemoths serving as a reminder of a bygone fight against Soviet invasion in the memories of your childhood. Still, though, there was beauty in the strangeness nonetheless.

From your tiny room in the Helena Lyudmila International Scholar’s dorm, for instance, you had a perfect view of a large campus courtyard hosting a statue of the donor by the same name. She was some royal who had invested in education a few hundred years ago, and by the looks of her metal likeness, she had been quite pretty. The sight of her shining in the early morning sun was one of the things that made uprooting your whole life seem worth it in the end, no matter how silly that seemed.

There were other small comforts that you had found beauty in during your first month attending your prestigious university, too.

You found beauty in the way the sunlight streamed over the rooftops like the opening to an Oscar-winning film. In the sound of traffic below and the overcast skies above. Sandwiches from corner stores, wildflowers growing in the median of the road, cups of the worlds best black coffee served steaming by scowling attendants at the cafe; Everywhere there was something small and kind and just familiar enough to relish in, more than able to distract you from the stress of living hand-to-mouth in a country where you didn’t even know the language. It made it all worth it.

That being said there was something else too…

Someone else to be specific.

The campus tended to run like clockwork. The same groups of students would walk past your window to their classes, the same professors would get their coffee and lunch at the little cafe across the square, and every weekday morning at 8 am on the dot, easel boy would set up his palette and canvas and paint the same bustling street.

He was talented, that you couldn’t deny. Even from the 6th floor, which was a considerable distance away, it was possible to admire the detailing and consistency with which he painted. His talent wasn’t when kept you captive at your window in the morning, though. Though you were sure his art was beautiful, he himself was a thousand times more stunning.

All dark eyes and dark hair and dark clothes, he parted crowds with his piercing gaze alone. He was always dressed like the protagonist of some awful artsy film. Massive argyle sweaters, untucked button-ups, corduroy jackets, and flare bottomed pants that must have survived his father’s wardrobe from the ’70s… his style was as close you could get to atrocious while still being impeccable as possible, and that wasn’t even getting started on the smudged black liner always present under his persistent gaze. You had never had the pleasure (or embarrassment for that matter) of meeting him in person, but you were sure that you would have had the same awed and slightly frightened reaction if you ever did. He could have been plucked entirely from the pages of some awful romance novel.

You were well and truly smitten with the idea of him.

If you looked at your morning routine through the eyes of a stranger, you’d consider yourself odd for your strange obsession with him, but you didn’t look at it like that. It wasn’t an obsession. You never overstepped your bounds. He was simply pleasing to look at and so you did. That didn’t constitute as obsessive, right?

Even if it did, you weren’t causing any harm.

Easel boy, as you had come to refer to him, was simply a tool you used to ground yourself in your new and frightening environment. Nothing more. If you ever met him, you would surely hate him from the short interactions you’d seen him have with strangers. They never ended well. He would remain an unattainable, attractive ideal in your mind until he eventually faded away into a funny memory you’d share with your kids one day.

Until then, though, you would watch him from your window before your morning classes and refused to feel guilty about it. So, that was that, no ifs, ands, or buts about it.

On the morning in question, you had woken up a little late and in a foul mood. In preparation for a test in your foundations of algebra course you had spent the better part of the night pouring over formulas while your upstairs neighbor’s bed slammed repeatedly into the wall and floor. Though you were sure they were having an excellent time, you were most definitely not. It all culminated in you missing your original alarms and despite the fact that your first class started at 10, you were exhausted, furious, and not looking forward to missing breakfast to finish the assigned reading you had put off the night before. The only thing keeping you from throwing in the towel and just giving up was the promise of seeing the painter.

So, when he arrived for the day at 8 am sharp, you were positioned at the ledge by your window, textbook in hand with a mug of instant coffee at your right. It was like a breath of fresh air.

As usual, he retrieved a small pack of cigarettes from the back of his eternally paint-stained jeans only to bring one to his lips and light it quickly. He always smoked before he worked, and just like always, he took an extra cigarette from the pack to tuck behind his ear for later. Then, he got to work setting up his easel and the small stool where he set his palette.

Pulling tubes of acrylic, brushes, and pencils from his well-worn messenger bag, easel boy flipped out the kickstand without any problem and set his thick, pre-primed canvas on the worn metal. You watched in fascination. Art had always seemed so unattainable to you. Instead, you were drawn to the more academic. The man before you, though, created beauty with an ease that had evaded you all your life, and it had you both jealous and entirely intrigued. Slowly, you reached down to take a sip of your coffee as you let your eyes drift back to your reading.

Learning about ancient Babylon was far less interesting than watching him, though.  

When you next looked out the window and away from your work the handsome artist had created his base sketch already. How did he do it so fast? You assumed it was practice. He had been drawing the same 3 buildings every weekday morning for at least a month, so after a while, it must have been second nature to measure out the lines and put things into perspective. You smiled. He tended to have that effect on you.

The process was repeated until a little before 9:30. You would read a few paragraphs then look up to watch the painting progress from a sketch to a full-fledged work of art. It was good today from what you could see. The colors were a bit more muted than usual, but that was only on account of the awful, dreary overcast sky that threatened to dump rain on the city at any time. Overall, you would have considered it a masterpiece. Easel boy didn’t seem to think the same.

He regarded the painting with a sort of begrudging satisfaction that bordered on disappointment before he pulled the second cigarette from behind his ear, lit it, and began the process of packing up his materials. You finished the last of your coffee watching him do so. Smoking, well, smoking tobacco at least, had always been a vice you had avoided and yet you often wondered what it would feel like to take a drag of one of his cigarettes after it had been between his lips. Then, the magic lifted.

He folded up the flimsy easel, tucked it away with his materials back into his messenger bag, hoisted the stool under one arm and the painting under the other before taking off at a brisk clip down the street away from your window. You watched him until he was out of sight.

You were snapped from your concentration by a knock at your door.

“Y/N,” a heavily accented voice called, sending you scrambling for your bag, “If you are not outside in the next 15 seconds I will break down your door,”

Shit.

“Coming, Sasha!” You wailed. It took about 10 of those seconds to grab your backpack and shove your textbook inside, an extra 2 to check your appearance in the mirror- you looked slightly disheveled, but it was the best you were gonna do after the night you’d had. Besides, it wasn’t like you were doing anything important. You didn’t need to be dressed for a date -and you were opening the door for a quick save at the 14th second. Your door was safe for another day.

Out in the hall waited Sasha Balandin, arms crossed and grey eyes piercing in the flickering light of the terrible overhead fluorescents. As a fellow international student, you had become fast friends with Sasha. He was a little rough around the edges, and definitely didn’t take your bullshit, but he was a rare friend. “I have been waiting for 10 minutes,” he griped. You tried your best to look apologetic. “Don’t do that,”

“Do what?” You asked, closing and locking your door behind you as you began walking down the hallway.

Sasha huffed. “Do not pretend you were not too busy ogling that painter in the courtyard to hear me knocking on your door,” His Russian bluntness was on full display now as you shook your head in mock disbelief.

“I can’t believe you’d accuse me of something like that!”

“It is not an accusation if it is true,”

“There’s no way you know for a fact that I was watching him again,”

“But you were. This happens every week,”

You sighed, pausing at the top of the stairs. “I was,”

Taking the stairs in twos, Sasha sighed. “You are too soft, Y/N. Besides, you have said so often that he seems like an asshole. Why do you continue to get all mushy at him out the window if this is the case?”

“Because… well, because…” for a moment, you floundered in search of an answer that wouldn’t make you sound like a complete freak, but you found that there really wasn’t one. It came down the one small factor. “He’s just really hot, okay?”

The look Sasha gave you could have killed. He kept his mouth shut, though, choosing to let his silence shame you more than anything else did. It worked. For the entire trip down the stairs and the mile-long walk to your lecture hall, you felt the weight of shame heavy on your shoulders. Or maybe it was just your backpack. You didn’t know which you’d prefer. He did start speaking again eventually, going on about some party you had missed in favor of studying, but the feeling never left. Even as you sat down for your lecture it was still at the forefront of your mind. In fact, you were so busy thinking about your crush on easel boy and the problems with it that you barely paid attention to the professor’s rehashing of the Epic of Gilgamesh.

Your error only hit when the professor flipped the PowerPoint to the final slide.

“Before you go, I want to remind you that you have a paper on the importance of Enkidu in the Epic is due at the beginning of class this Friday. The details and requirements should be listed in your syllabus. Class dismissed,”

Fuck.

Friday was only two days away.

You were so screwed.

The problem was, you didn’t have a spare copy of the Epic of Gilgamesh just lying around your dorm room. Usually that wouldn’t have been an issue, the professor for your current history course used English for her slide because her particular history course was specifically for first-year international students. Unfortunately for you, though, you hadn’t been taking notes. Instead, you had been daydreaming about how it would feel to have easel boy blow his cigarette smoke in your face and then subsequently scolding yourself for having thoughts like that about a total stranger. In a terrible twist of fate, the professor only held office hours after her last classes on Mondays and Fridays, so even getting the information from her then was off the table. Dread began to pool in your stomach.

Any other student would have been able to cut their losses, rent a copy from the library, slog through it in a night, and write the damn essay even without the help of the classroom slides for context. The only problem was all the books in the library were in Sokovian, and you still barely knew how to order a coffee correctly. Reading the language in a full Cyrillic alphabet would just be impossible, especially for a book as stupidly old as the Epic of Gilgamesh.

In short, unless you could get your hands on a copy in the next day or so, you were absolutely, well-and-truly fucked.

Sasha was quick to find you as the hall cleared out, waiting near your seat as you packed away your notes. “That was all bullshit, no?” He asked, but the second he took in your slightly panicked expression he stopped short, pinching the bridge of his nose and breathing deeply. You knew what he was going to say before he ever said it.

“Something is wrong. You were not paying attention. Were you thinking-”

“Yes. Okay? Yes, I was thinking about him,”

He shook his head slightly. “I am concerned for you,”

“Who isn’t?”

Despite his usually stoic demeanor, that made Sasha huff out a soft laugh. “You got yourself into this mess, Y/N, you will get yourself out somehow,”

Your jaw dropped as you slung your bag over your shoulder and started making your way towards the door. “You’re not gonna help me?”

“Though I would love to be helpful, you forget that my English is poor. It will do me better to read the book in Sokovian myself than to use the information from class,”

Oh, yeah. You winced. “Sorry, Sash’”

“Nothing to be sorry for,” he shrugged as you walked out onto the lawn, chilled to the bone by the wind that whipped in every direction.

A storm was brewing. It might not fully take hold of the city for a few hours yet, but it would make the walk to your evening class absolute hell if the rain fell as hard as it had several weeks prior. You could only hope that it wouldn’t start until after you had walked home. Your odds were looking slim, though, based on the way you could already hear thunder clapping in the distance. After a moment you hit the edge of the sidewalk where your paths would diverge.

“Good luck with the paper,” you offered weakly.

Sasha replied with a sharp, “Good luck with your crush,” and then he was off in the opposite direction without another word. Sasha was blunt like that, never overstaying his welcome or lingering when he didn’t need to. There was something enviable about it. What you wouldn’t give to be able to simply say things as they were without an unnecessary sugar coating to save face and spare feelings. It lingered on your mind for the whole half-mile walk to the campus bookstore. Speaking of which...

There was only one place where you might possibly find an English copy of the Epic of Gilgamesh. It wasn’t the big student bookstore, most of the textbooks there had been in Sokovian, Russian, or German and you hadn’t even tried to set foot in their actual book section. No, your only hope was the tiny hole-in-the-wall bookstore you had stumbled upon during move-in. It was only about half a mile away from your dorm from any of your lecture halls, so you often found yourself wandering inside when you had time to kill. They were one of the only stores you’d come across that sold anything in English, magazines included, so despite the fact that the young cashiers rarely spoke your language you often found that the back shelves of that tiny shop kept you from going mad.

Now, they might also be keeping you from ruining your GPA.

You could only hope. If anybody could save you, it was them.

Ducking in through the small doorway, you were greeted by the soft ring of the bell above your head. The attendant at the register simply regarded you with a polite nod. You had seen her there before and she knew you barely spoke a lick of Sokovian, so she didn’t attempt a pleasantry. Instead, she simply let you wander through the entrance and into the towering bookshelves, passing a few other faceless shoppers on your way towards the back. You were grateful for her nonchalance.

If there was anything worse than feeling foolish for not knowing Sokovian, it was being talked down to in perfect English by a Sokovian citizen. Most interactions left you wishing you’d actually taken anything away from your high school French class other than emotional trauma from your teacher and a caffeine addiction. Damn America and its terrible public-school language programs…

The path to the English classics section was one you’d walked many times since discovering the book store. It was right in the very back corner of the shop, tucked away where the city natives wouldn’t have to address or see it. You had snagged a copy of Pride and Prejudice a few weeks back, so you knew exactly where to search. The only problem was slogging through every single book on the shelf in search of the one you were looking for.

Your eyes scanned the wall.  

Gilgamesh, Gilgamesh, Gilgamesh…

Gilgamesh!

On the 6th shelf up sat one small copy. Score! You were saved! As you reached up to grab it, though, you were met with yet another roadblock. The shelf it was on was juuuust a little too high for you to reach. Oh, come on…

You hopped a little, extending your hand up as far as it could go, but your fingers just barely brushed the spine. Somewhere behind you, you could hear footsteps. Then someone coughed to suppress laughter. The shame was plain on your face. As your flannel rode up and you stretched up in one last desperate attempt to grab the book when suddenly someone, you assumed the same person who had been laughing at your misfortune, spoke.

“They have stools, you know,” he said, accented voice thick with amusement. The English surprised you, but you assumed they used it for your benefit. You were in front of the English language books after all. Besides, the shame of it all kept your mind from questioning it too much. “For reaching the top shelf,”

Of course they had stools.

If your face hadn’t already been burning with embarrassment it definitely was now.

In a split-second decision, you decided playing dumb was the only way you could walk out of the situation with any dignity left at all, so you plastered on a confused smile and spun around to greet the stranger. “Really? I had no cl-”

You stopped short.

Oh.

Oh no.

You’d know those paint-stained jeans anywhere.

There, with his hands in his pockets and the most self-important, thin-lipped smirk you had ever seen, was easel boy in all of his cocky, intimidating, hot glory. Had you really noticed how hot he truly was before? It didn’t feel like it. Not now that you’d really seen him close up and reveled in the way his dark eyes hypnotized you with their smudged liner that felt borderline obscene. You could smell him too, all charcoal and turpentine and cigarette smoke. If you had it bad before when he was just a blurry ideal out your window, you were completely and utterly smitten now.

He regarded you with a sort of practiced annoyance, and yet there was a strange softness to it that you hadn’t found in many native Sokovians, especially ones that saw you as the stupid, bumbling American wandering blindly around their country.

“Would you like my help?”

“Huh?” You were so lost in his eyes that you couldn’t even focus on his question.

“To reach your book. Would you like my help?”

“Oh!” With a brisk nod, you stepped away from the shelf to make room for easel boy, “yeah, I’m just trying to grab that one there. The, uh, Epic of Gilgamesh,”

In one swift movement, he was stepping right beside you to easily reach up and grab the offending piece of literature. The closeness of it all nearly sent you into a tailspin. That wasn’t even mentioning the way your heart thudded just a little faster when he finally handed the book to you, his calloused fingers brushing against your own. You barely find a grip on your brain strong enough to thank him through the fog of embarrassment and attraction. Eventually, though, you managed to choke out a placation as your eyes explored the cover of the book.

“Thanks for that,”

“It was no problem,” he shrugged. He didn’t move though, still standing just inches away from you. When you looked up from the book you found his eyes were still on you, watching intently as if he expected something from you. The answer to what he actually expected was a mystery but you could tell he wanted something. When you didn’t speak, he spoke for you. “So, The Epic of Gilgamesh? That’s definitely a bold choice,”

You looked up at him sheepishly through heavily lidded eyes. “It’s not a choice at all, actually. I’m only buying it so I can write an essay,”

“Ah,” Something about his tone was almost disappointed as the conversation stalled.

You quickly changed the subject to the first thing you could think of.

“Your hair is really nice!”

“My hair?”

“Yeah… your hair,”

Smooth move, dumbass.

Easel boy’s expression seemed to soften once more as his signature grin crept back onto his face. “Thank you, I grew it myself,” Between his accent and the way he was looking at you like he was going to eat you alive, you weren’t exactly sure how you hadn’t had a heart attack yet. Still, the attention was nice, even if it was bourne out of you repeatedly embarrassing yourself in a never-ending cycle of fuckups. He ran a hand through his loose brown hair. “I like your shirt. Very American,”

Silently, you cursed yourself for not taking a few extra seconds to pick out a better outfit when you woke up. Standing next to him, even while he was dressed in his paint-stained jeans and undone button-up, you looked like a wreck in comparison. He didn’t seem to be speaking from a place of judgment, though.

If you didn’t know better, you’d think he was being nice, but that couldn’t be the case… could it?

“Maybe it’s just that I haven’t met very many Sokovians that are fond of America, but I’m not sure if that was meant to be a compliment or an insult,” You joked. It was a bit sarcastic, the lilt of your voice masking your deep insecurity, and to your surprise easel boy laughed. He really laughed. From your place beside him, you could almost feel the warmth radiating off of him as he shook his head.

“It was definitely a compliment,”

Oh.

Your heart skipped a beat.

That was a new revelation.

You steeled yourself with a deep breath. Fuck it. It was now or never.

“I, uh… I’m Y/N, and you are?”

He regarded you once again with that strange expression of expectation. “What?”

“I asked for your name,” you repeated, and yet he still stood, slightly dumbfounded, staring down at you with that same expectant expression from earlier. For a moment, you almost thought he expected you to know it already. That fact was quickly glossed over when he moved to rub the back of his neck with his hand, eyes drifting down to the floor.

“Sorry,” he chuckled, “I’m not very good with people. My father thought college might help me finally connect with my peers, but I don’t think he expected that I was the problem, nor do I think he expected me to pick a degree in the arts,” Suddenly, he paused and stuck out his hand to you. “I’m Hel. It’s very nice to meet you Y/N,”

With only a moment of hesitation- because wow, your name had never sounded more right on someone’s lips -you took his large calloused hand in your own and shook it gently. His palm was warm, his fingers lingering on your own for just a moment even as he pulled away. It wasn’t much, just a soft brush against your flesh, but it sent a flash of heat and liquid confidence through your chest.

“Is that short for something?” Your eyes met his in the soft yellow glow of the overhead lamps. Seeing him like this, so up close and personal, he looked a lot more human than he had from your window. Sure, he was imposing. Underneath the initial harsh facade, though, was something softer and almost poetic. You weren’t an artist by any means but if you had been, you had no doubt that he’d be your muse.

“It’s short for Helmut, but only my father calls me that, and only when he’s cross, which, unfortunately, is most of the time,” he chuckled, “Besides, it’s an old man’s name. It doesn’t suit me,”

The words left your mouth before you knew what you were saying.

“Well, it’s better than calling you easel boy,”

Shit.

Today really just wasn’t your day, huh?

In the split second where you were mourning your chances with the most stupidly handsome guy who had ever shown any interest in you, you almost missed the way Helmut’s eyes lit up at the admission.

“Easel boy?” His voice was teasing, but not demeaning. That didn’t do much to ease your mortification, though.

“Is there any chance that I can get you to forget I said anything?”

“If you already have a nickname for me when we’ve barely met, I think you already know the answer to that question,”

His knowing smirk was enough to get you pleading. “You can’t just let me off the hook this once?” you begged, scrubbing a hand across your forehead in a desperate attempt to get away from his piercing gaze. The things those brown eyes did to you could be classified as obscene… “I will genuinely do anything if you don’t make me explain myself right now Hel,”

Hel quirked up an eyebrow. “Anything?” The way your stomach turned at just one word from him was both terrifying and extremely exciting. It felt like a promise. Without hesitation, you nodded. That made him smile. “In that case, get coffee with me today?”

Once again, you were rendered speechless.

“My treat,” he added, “unless you’re not interested…”

“No!” Your answer left your lips embarrassingly fast, “Or- yes? No, no, I think I meant no. No; I am very interested. Yes; I would like to get coffee with you,” There was a hint of shame in your words, but only a hint. After the day you’d had already, there wasn’t very much there to be ashamed of. Still, that same pit of dread began to open up in your stomach as you mulled over your choices.

Thankfully, Helmut continued to take it all in stride. “Wonderful! Is there anything else you’d like to do here before we go? It’s best we leave soon if we want to beat the rain,” He offered up his arm as he spoke like some sort of Disney prince. It was, by far, the cutest gesture you had ever been lucky enough to receive.

You linked your arm with his without hesitation. “As soon as I pay we can get going,” He was warm. It radiated off him in waves just like the warm hints of tobacco and wintermint that seemed to seep from his skin and clothes. With that, you made your way to the front desk as Hel shot you a sly smile.

“Who said anything about letting you pay?”

True to his word, he didn’t let you pay for a single thing for the rest of the afternoon.

The two of you made your way up to the cashier together, and Helmut only separated from your side to grab his wallet before you could grab yours. He then spoke in rapid-fire Sokovian to the lady at the register and pulled what could only be described as a wad of Sokovian koronas while you set the book on the counter, and from the looks of it, she seemed more than pleased with the two of you. Who wouldn’t be, especially when Hel seemed to insist that she keep the excess? In the end, after the book had been wrapped nicely in a paper bag and deposited in your backpack, Helmut held the door open for you like some sort of gentleman and followed you out into the grey afternoon.

Then, you were off down the street on Hel’s arm, pushing through the wind and the biting chill that had settled in the air.

“So, you don’t sound like a big fan of your dad,” you asked, half laughing as you attempted to broach conversation once again.

Helmut groaned beside you. “My father is a menace who is unable to understand that some people want more in life than to sit behind a desk all day making phone calls. In fact, most of my family is the same way. The only reason I haven’t completely cut them off and changed my name is the money,”

“I assume you get a lot of it if it’s worth sticking around someone you hate so much,”

“Never ask a man about his net worth,” he chuckled, gently elbowing you in the ribs, “but yes, I’m very comfortable. I have my own apartment just far enough away to be considered off-campus with my own car and as much money as it takes to keep me happy and getting good grades; Daddy makes sure of that,” The word daddy was a deep sneer, barely there in the wind, but something about it sent butterflies through your stomach. Well, that was never something you thought you were into… “Little does he know, I’m not here to make money. I’m here to find inspiration worth my time while out from under his thumb,”  

You snorted softly. “Artistic and rich? You’re just ticking all the boxes, Hel,”

“Good for me. Would offering help on that essay of yours endear you to me further?”

“Absolutely,”

The next 5 minutes you spend discussing the Epic of Gilgamesh. Surprisingly, in one of the first stokes of good luck you’d had all day, Helmut seemed to be one of the only people on earth who knew plenty about Enkidu off the top of his head. When he was the one lecturing you in his smooth, heavily accented timbre it was so much easier to pay attention to something so very tedious than when you heard it from your aging and often monotone professor. In fact, you were so enthralled by his retelling of the tale that you barely noticed you’d made it all the way to the cafe that sat across from the international dorm.

If you didn’t consider Hel to be smart as a whip and twice as clever as he was smart, you would have thought it was a coincidence. It couldn’t be though. No, there was no way anything was a coincidence with Helmut around. You shot him a smile when he opened the door for you and ushered you inside.

“You know Hel,” you muttered, “I’m starting to think you might know more about me than you initially let on,”

He shrugged. “You’re American, so it’s unlikely you live anywhere else and I wanted to make the walk home easy. It’s supposed to rain, you know? Besides, despite the… interesting waitstaff, they make the best pastries in town right here in this cafe,”

“Did you mean it when you said you were paying?”

“Absolutely,”

“Then I can’t wait to try one,”

The two of you were seated quickly (you assumed it had to do with the waitress finding Hel as hot as you did, because you caught her looking at him from behind the counter and whispering excitedly in Sokovian to her coworker at least twice over the course of the meal) and the conversation flowed easily as you waited on your coffees and the deserts Helmut insisted on splitting to let you try. Millefeuille, pear tart tatin, chocolate devil’s food cake, and a towering plate of apricot kołaczki awaited you, and they kept you sitting and talking and snacking for over an hour as you really got to know each other. The more you learned, the more you fell in love with the man across from you.

Over the course of the afternoon, you learned that Helmut was majoring in studio art while minoring in psychology just because it interested him, he hated the Beatles almost as much as he hated Freud’s theories on women, his favorite color was purple, and he spent most of his free time reading or getting high off his ass in his massive studio apartment in what you now knew was one of the most expensive areas in the city. He, in return, sat at rapt attention across the table as you gushed about your life in America, your reasons for going to university in Sokovia, your favorite books, and the ridiculousness that was trying to pass college-level classes in a country that seemed to avoid English at all costs.

Eventually, though, you did touch upon his nickname.

“I just thought it was really interesting that you did the same thing every single day, no matter what,” you explained, grabbing one of the last kołaczki from the plate and ignoring the powdered sugar that stuck to your fingers, “and by watching you… I don’t know, I guess it kind of felt like I had another friend who’d share breakfast with me in the morning if that makes sense,”

Hel nodded, swallowing his last bite of chocolate cake. “I understand completely. It can be lonely, coming to a new place without any friends or connections, but you were brave enough to take the leap. I admire that,” He brought his napkin to his lips before crumpling it and setting it one of the now empty plates before him, “But I can’t say I’m not a little disappointed that you didn’t watch me because I’m attractive,”

You nearly choked on your pastry. “Well, I wouldn’t say your pretty face didn’t help…”

The grin that spread across his face was heartstopping. He grabbed a napkin from the little holder next to the two of you and grabbed a pen from one of his pockets as he spoke. “In that case, you should join me tomorrow morning. Bring coffee if you can, I never have enough hands to bring a cup for myself, but even if you can’t bring some, if you want to come and watch me work I’d be more than happy to have a companion for the morning,” he paused for a moment, flustered, “or every morning, for that matter,”

“That sounds like a deal,” Your cheeks were hot, but not from embarrassment this time. No, it was anything but, because here you were across the table from a kind, attractive, intelligent Sokovian boy with money to spend and time to spare for you. You couldn’t help but feel a little bit proud too. He wanted you back, after all. You could see it in the way his eyes lingered on you just a little longer than he should, and even more plainly in the way he wrote his phone number in bold blue ink on the napkin and signed it with a doodle of a heart before passing it across the table to you.

“I’m going to go pay,” he said quietly while standing, “but I’ll be back in a second to walk you out. Alright?”

“Alright,”

There was something strangely similar to sorrow sitting in your chest when you watched him walk away. The sight of his ass as he went made up for it, though. Once he was obstructed by other patrons, you turned your attention to the napkin in your hands. Hel’s handwriting was neat as far as artists’ handwriting goes, but it still held a sort of looseness in its curves, a freedom in the way the numbers had flowed effortlessly from his pen. You popped the last kołaczki in your mouth as you admired the blue ink before devouring the final bites of pear tart and millefeuille. How had you gotten so lucky to have someone like him giving you his number and buying you pastries? You pondered the bizarre nature of it all until Helmut returned.

You stood quickly, folding the napkin and putting it away in your pocket. “Ready to go?”

“If you are,” he replied. In an instant, you were standing beside him again as he opened the door for you. The wind was even stronger now, strong enough that his loose hair whipped wildly around his forehead from the force of it. You couldn’t help but giggle at his appearance.

He caught you off guard as he walked you across the street. “You have such a pretty laugh,”

It was like you were seeing him again for the first time. You fiddled with the strap of your backpack as you got closer and closer to the door to your dorm. “Thanks. I’m pretty fond of your laugh too,”

Then, you were there, just two college kids standing awkwardly before your first departure.

“So,” you said before you could stop yourself, “when I tell my one friend all about this afternoon after my math class tonight, should I say it was a date?”

Hel’s cheeks flushed pink. “You can call it that, if that’s what you would like it to have been,”

“I think I would,”

“Good, good,” he let out a little chuckle, “I’m glad. Would you… would you consider going on another? I promise I have much more to offer than just small talk and tips on where to buy the best pastries,”

Looking into his brown eyes, so full of uncertainty and hope, you knew you couldn’t have denied him even if you wanted to. Still, you weren’t going to give in to his advances without a little bit of taunting. It made it fun, a game to be played where, hopefully, you both would win big in the end.

“That depends,” you teased, letting your lower lip catch between your teeth, “what do you have in mind?”

Helmut shoved his hands into his pockets as he rocked back and forth on his heels, pensive. “If you want to, we could go to my place and I could actually show you all of the paintings I’ve been working on while you watched me. The view from the rooftop is lovely too. We could have dinner up there while looking out over Novi Grad. I have to warn you, though, it’ll probably be takeout. I’m an atrocious chef,”

Slowly, a brilliant smile spread across your face. “Does Friday work?”

The smile Helmut shot back was as bright as every star in the night sky and even more enthralling. “Friday is perfect. Can I pick you up at 7?”

“As long as you come in that fancy car you were talking about,”

“Then it’s a deal,”

“Well,” you turned away, walking up the steps towards the door before turning back to him, “I’ll see you tomorrow morning, Hel, and I’ll bring coffee. Have a good night,”

“You too, Y/N. Parting is such sweet sorrow and all that,”

With that, he gave one last short wave before turning on his heel and pulling out a cigarette from the pack in his pocket. You watched him walk away until he turned the corner and disappeared from view. Only then did you enter the punch code and race up the stairs to your room.

Your back was pressed to the door of your dorm room the second you had shut it, your hands clutching at your chest in a desperate attempt to keep your heart from beating right out of your ribs. The second you were in the privacy of your own place, your cool facade had melted away to reveal just how much of a wreck you really were.

He had invited you over to his apartment.

He liked you.

Easel boy really, honestly liked you.

No, not easel boy. Helmut. Hel.

Hel liked you, and he invited you over to his apartment, and you had plans to meet him with coffee as he painted the next morning.

You smiled softly under the fluorescent lights and pulled the book that had brought you together from your backpack. It seemed so unassuming now, just a fresh paperback with an unbroken spine, but in reality, it was so much more than that.

Hel.

It was such a nice name. You liked it a lot.

Now you couldn’t wait to see what else you liked about him too.

------

a/n: I have been so excited to start sharing this AU with you guys, and it’s finally here!!! If you liked this fic, I once again will direct you to Bliss by @creme-bruhlee​ because that’s technically next in chronological order for this AU. I hope you enjoyed!!!

TAGLIST: @tatestripedsweater , @elaineygrace, @multiyfandomgirl40 ,  @lovelymischief , @rami-malek-trash , @avgravy , @wh0re-4-techno , @forcebros , @sugarsweetkiss , @grandmuffinsharkbailiff , @killsandthrills , @novasstudy , @thnksfr-ptrkstmp , @inmate-marmalade, @alanathedeer , @your-pixels-are-showing , @shit-post-things , @bbarton​ , @sux-ubus , @halefirewarrior , @janelongxox , @rax-writes , @mossybank​ , @simsiddy​ , @xxspqcebunsxx​ , @be-cautious-around-bri​ , @metaphorical-love-for-a-car​ , @frothonthedaydreams​ 

#zemo #helmut zemo #baron zemo #baron helmut zemo #zemo x reader #helmut zemo x reader #baron zemo x reader #baron helmut zemo x reader #fanfiction

[gakkubi]

Ame Trio Analysis: Konan

I want to share some thoughts on the Ame Trio/Ame Orphans because I do think they have one of the most complex, interesting and beautiful arcs in the Narutoverse. I will discuss their personalities and thoughts. This post is about Konan, there are also Yahiko and Nagato. (3/3): I'll end with Konan because she's the one who lives the longer and is impacted by both Yahiko and Nagato's death.

KONAN:

Also available in Russian: ссылка на русский перевод

Konan is possibly the hardest character to analyse because her stand-alone arc is the last one to appear, and the story doesn't dwell on her ideals and motivations until the very end - despite that, it's my personal belief she's one of the best female characters developed in the series. With a few exceptions, female characters in the Narutoverse will usually take the position of supporting the male characters - but unlike most of the other women, Konan's position of support actually makes sense with her character.

A person not being the "original creator" of the philosophy they follow or joining other characters to achieve a common goal does not mean they don't have a mind or will of their own; Konan is just as free to make her own decisions as the other characters.

While Yahiko takes the role of "fallen hero" and Nagato is the "unwilling protagonist", Konan is the ever-present observer; she's the last one to take the spotlight in the Ame Trio storyline, and with her, the last open ends are closed. Konan is the element which endured throughout all of the Ame Trio's different phases, from their start to their brightest and darkest points until the very end. She's the Angel, the one who will carry and reinforce the will she has received.

Konan has a moral trait which makes her strikingly different from Yahiko and Nagato; she is not loyal to abstract ideals, but rather concrete ones. Even though Yahiko and Nagato eventually digress on their philosophies, both dedicate their lives to the pursuit of peace and give up their lives to guarantee the survival of their goal, as abstract as it may be.

Konan, on the other hand, is loyal to people; of course she had beliefs of her own, but they mostly come from a local perspective, not a universal one. She's loyal to Amegakure; to her country, to her people, her citizens, her friends.

It's heavily implied in the story (more in the anime than the manga) that the people of Amegakure held her in high esteem (perhaps even more than they held Pain himself). This shines a new light on Konan, who early on the story was just an unknown villain of the Akatsuki - in fact, we come to learn most of the important aspects of her personality lie outside of the classic, evil Akatsuki.

To understand Konan it's important to understand the Ame Trio's dynamic as a whole; it's fundamental to consider that, just like Nagato, Konan owes her life to Yahiko's fierce will of surviving- her backstory alone with Yahiko is never shown but it's heavily implied that she was just as dependent on him as Nagato was. Like Nagato, her personality is much more passive and quiet until provoked.

Both Konan and Nagato were Yahiko's followers, and they were happy that way - they believed in his dream and his philosophy and found in the Akatsuki the meaning of their lives. It's important to understand that Yahiko's goals are also her goals, regardless if she was the one who created them or not; it's better to say he first inspired her into creating such dreams for herself.

Many other (very popular and loved) characters in the Naruto universe follow dreams and philosophies not originally created by themselves and are not perceived as mere "followers without opinion" like Konan sometimes is.

A common reason for the misunderstanding of Konan's character to claim she has no will of her own is that she continued to support Nagato even though he suffers an immense personality and philosophical shift after Yahiko's death. It's often wondered why Konan decided to stay by Nagato's side after Yahiko's death despite his radical change, and it's often associated with her having no ideas of her own. This is not true; the story builds a very logical and realistic reason for her to continue supporting him regardless of her truly agreeing with his new peace philosophy.

Very much like Nagato, Konan saw the people she loved and her reasons to live be taken away from her twice. The first time, it was Yahiko who gave both of them meaning and direction; the second time Nagato and Konan found themselves having nothing again - all they had was the legacy Jiraiya and Yahiko left behind.

Konan's life was saved by Yahiko twice; first when he helped her survive and second when he sacrificed himself so she could escape Hanzo's trap. It's important to realize the reason why Hanzo could trap Yahiko and Nagato is that they captured her first; although we have no evidence for this, it's possible Konan also felt guilt for "giving" the enemy a token to which they could manipulate Yahiko into obedience.

Yahiko being a key factor on her survival (both physical and mental) and her feeling responsible for his death are both factors that could result in her feeling immense guilt and a sense of debt with him. Like Nagato, Konan couldn't just let Yahiko's death be pointless after giving up his life for them.

Any reasonable person would have their hope shaken after seeing Yahiko get killed after his "non-violence, mutual understanding" philosophy failed. It would take an enormous endurance and faith to lose a person who she loved and keep on trying the same thing with the hope that "next time things will work as intended." Perhaps, things would never work as Yahiko imagined - perhaps his original plan needed adaptations.

However, unlike Nagato, Konan hadn't been conditioned by either Jiraiya or Yahiko to think that she was the one who would find the key to peace; she didn't spend her life pressured by the responsibility of coming up with a plan. Nagato was the one who the former leaders trusted would find the answer to end all the wars - and he stepped up to continue the "plan to peace" with his new ideas of how to get there.

And there's yet another important factor in all this; Yahiko had left her with a mission - the mission of supporting Nagato. The conversation where Yahiko entitles her with the responsibility of being by Nagato's side is highlighted in her fight against Obito to tell us, the audience, why Konan is so determined to help Naruto now - her mission of protecting the "savior of the world", originally given by Yahiko, had been transferred from supporting Nagato to Naruto.

Once we see the perspective of her feeling like she was in debt with Yahiko for saving her life twice - and adding love and guilt to the mixture, which makes it much harder for reason to overpower emotion -, it's easy to see why it could be hard to nearly impossible for her to dismiss the last mission she could actually complete; following Yahiko's will was a way of still being connected to him after he was gone.

Both Nagato and Konan nearly lost the meaning of their lives when Yahiko was killed and the original Akatsuki destroyed - both clinged to what they had left. Neither ever had a proper environment to deal with the grief they felt, a grief that echoed a childhood trauma that shaped all of their lives.

All of these factors are reasons why it would be hard for Konan to look objectively at what she was doing by supporting Nagato's new philosophy; however, Konan wasn't just guilt trapped into being by his side.

Konan, as I stated before, is much more pragmatic than her counterparts; she's loyal to what is hers - her friends, her nation. Even if we ignore the guilt or the "mission", it's safe to assume she would have stayed by his side anyway; Nagato was all the family she had left, and she was loyal to what was hers above all else.

Perhaps, if the mental conditions weren't so harsh, Konan could have resisted or opposed some of Nagato's new radical ideas more than she already did - debated with him, perhaps they could have convinced each other to stay in Yahiko's path. In the anime, Obito even says he relied on Konan for "calming" Nagato, which tells us that she reasoned with him to some extent - however, neither of them were able to keep their pain from overriding the morals they previously had.

Konan has a mind of her own, and it's shown to us in the moments where she disagrees either visually or verbally with Nagato's actions; Jiraiya's death, Konoha's destruction and the conversation with Naruto are moments where she confronts him. She is shown disagreeing with Nagato on multiple instances, which is proof that she felt she could voice her discontent with him - that she didn't feel completely trapped by guilt or that all she had to do was simply obey him; she was not just a voiceless "Angel" obeying her "God." We're also shown that Nagato disregards many of her opinions - by the time he becomes a villain, he is extremely narcissistic and confident in his hability to make the right choice - but that doesn't keep her from voicing her disagreement anyway.

It's not clear to us, the audience, how much Konan was hurt by Nagato's disregard (we're shown she is uncomfortable to some extent); it's the combination of her guilt, Yahiko's "mission" and her own faith in Nagato's plan that keeps her following their goal.

All the members of the Ame Trio value the search for peace above everything else, each in their own particular way.

Unlike Nagato, Konan has a much clear and objective way of thinking, interested only in what will serve them to achieve their goal and dismissing everything else that will not be useful.

Konan is never shown having any interest whatsoever in the other members of the Akatsuki (she never engages in the conversations they have), in the people of Konoha (which is why she condones wasting energy on being violent with them) or even in what Naruto has to say. All that she cares about is what is hers - her nation, her family; she's completely indifferent to everything else.

(That being said, I must note we don't know how her relationships with the other Akatsuki work as it would be impossible for her to spend almost 20 years without interacting with the other members. One of Konan's most important traits is her kindness, so it's "in character" to assume she would treat them respectfully and kindly, being fond of them to some extent; it's also safe to assume she didn't care about them at all, given her behavior in the manga. I think both interpretations are equally canonical because they lean on different aspects of her personality to fill a backstory we're never shown).

Although Konan is never shown being especially inclined to violence, her indifference and disergard for everything that is not hers - together with her own belief on Nagato's plan and the suffering which she endured - allows her to be the cold-blooded leader and killer she eventually becomes.

Konan believed in Nagato - like both Jiraiya and Yahiko did - while recognizing his flaws. When Naruto received recognition and acceptance from Nagato, he was incorporated to Konan's definition of what is "hers"; she aligns him in a sequence of "saviors" who she believed, a sequence that began with Yahiko and continued with Nagato. She makes the conscious decision of giving up her life for her dream of peace as Yahiko and Nagato have done before her.

Obito is the example of a person who Konan never incorporated on what is "hers" - this is clear on their fight where she says she studied his moves and his powers all the years they have worked together, and also clear on the passive-aggressive conversation they have after Jiraiya's death (Chapter 407). The way their relationship works - especially considering that she spent approximately half of her life working with him - also shows that Konan doesn't blindly support other characters for the sake of supporting them; for all we know, she trusted him much less than Nagato did.

It's also in Konan's fight with him that we see her analytical intelligence at full bloom - I dare say she is the most intelligent of the trio when it comes to strategy; first, for not ever truly trusting Obito to begin with (possibly because Yahiko also didn't), and second for being able to set a strategy that effectively killed him (hence why he used Izanagi - he was killed by her) with information based on her own observations.

Konan is extremely careful and precise; she pays incredible attention to detail, being able to draw accurate conclusions after analyzing just a little information.

Konan isn't ever shown to be hateful or angry, with the exception of her encounter with Jiraiya, where she treats him with spite, taunting him with the idea that following Orochimaru's suggestion could have avoided all the trouble he was going through with the Akatsuki. It's one of the few times we see Konan treating anyone in a way that is not kind or neutral, as if she held some type of resentment against Jiraiya - I like to think she blamed him, in a way or another, for not preparing them well enough for the cruelty of the world; for letting them be so naïve that Yahiko could be killed in a trap easily avoidable. It's obvious that Konan still held Jiraiya in some regard as it's easier for people to lash out on those who they like the most - after many years interacting with people to whom she was completely indifferent (outside of Nagato), Konan was finally talking to a person she had feelings for.

She is also - as described by Jiraiya and also viewed on the characters memories - a very kind, gentle, caring person; the very fact that she chose to save Nagato by sharing food with him shows her predisposition to helping others. Her kindness wasn't lost after Yahiko's death, but mostly replaced by the indifference she felt at everything that did not contemplate her goals, her family or her nation. After she accepts Naruto as being "one of her own" and sharing goals with him, she's quick to display kindness towards him and indirectly make amends with Jiraiya in the process.

As quiet, introspective person, Konan is very self-sufficient; although she is a member of the Akatsuki, she only interacts with them when necessary, probably spending most of her time alone or caring for Amegakure's business (as she shared both Akatsuki and Amegakure's leadership with Nagato and he was more active with the Akatsuki, it's safe to assume she cared for the other half). Her quiet, calmer nature matches that of Nagato; they could find understanding by having similar thought processes and also having a harder time processing their feelings, finding sympathy and comfort in each other.

Although I have mentioned that Konan might have felt a sense of debt towards Yahiko for saving her life, I want to highlight I see this feelings as possible only after his death because of its traumatizing circumstances; I don't think she felt she owed him anything while they were all alive, especially because it's never shown that he ever demanded such recognition. Yahiko and Konan have very distinct energies and personalities that complete each other, their relationship has a strong foundation because they share the same core beliefs and traits; loyalty and faith. I can see her falling in love with him for many reasons and one of them being by her admiring how hard he works to achieve the goal of peace.

Konan is a person that feels gentle and kind towards life as a whole; she doesn't seem to need much to be happy - as a child she made origami to pass time and have fun (and eventually used her intelligence to turn her passion into power); as an adult, the anime dedicates a scene to show her smiling to the rain while thinking of happy memories - happy for the sake of being in peace with the new direction she was taking her life after she and Nagato found someone to believe in again.

(Edit: Unfortunately I could not add another image to the post to illustrate this comment, but I wanted to talk about one aspect of Konan's personality that I like a lot and also forgot to mention. Despite her collected and serious demeanor, she also has a tendency to taunt people, a bit similar to Nagato's taste for ironic jokes. This is shown just a few times. In chapter 373, when Yahiko says he will save Nagato the next time something happens, Konan makes fun of him by remarking that Nagato is actually stronger than him, and she laughs when he gets annoyed. As I showed before, she also provokes Jiraiya with the hypothesis of things being better if Orochimaru had killed them. In her fight with Obito, despite his clear disinterest in what she was saying, Konan goes on to explain why Nagato and her betrayed him, and why he will never win. During the Water on a Frog's Face Training with Jiraiya she's also shown laughing at Yahiko's clumsiness. In my opinion, the way she evidently enjoys herself when she mocks people is strikingly contrasting to her generally unaffected personality, and personally I like that most of those times Yahiko was involved. Both in the anime, because of the animation, and in the manga because of Yahiko's surprise, I'm also under the impression that she was the one to initiate their kiss).

All of the Rain Trio's characters have very distinct and interesting psychologies; personally, I find Konan to be the most complex one because of the extreme discrepancies she displays, sometimes warm and kind, sometimes extremely cold and indifferent. I think the way she seems to only care about a very limited aspect of things is very attractive, as it shows how focused she is on her goals - as a nonviolent person, the most cruel act of Konan as a villain comes from her apathy to everyone else that is not part of what is "hers." Unlike Nagato and most of the other members of the Akatsuki who actively indulge in vile acts, she simply pursues her goals, removing anything and anyone on her way.

When he watch Konan's childhood, we see a child that is kind and light-hearted despite of all the pain she has endured, and only after being inflicted by yet another wave of suffering Konan's empathy and hope are shaken to the core; however, we learn her feelings were not dead but rather dormant, and it's by reconnecting to her core traits and beliefs that she finally finds peace in the very end.

#konan #meta #mymeta #naruto #naruto meta #character study #character analysis #analysis #amegakure

[heliosthegriffin]

The Adventures of Shota Jaune, Ep II

Chapter Two

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Two Months have passed.

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The last couple of months had been absolutely wild for Vernal.

First, the woman she respected the most and thought was the strongest in the world was beaten by three children... and Vernal, after it turned out Raven was a complete psycho bitch. In a moment of sheer panic she had just swore allegiance to the strongest thing in the vicinity. The little aura monster that had knocked her old boss's teeth out.

Jaune Arc aka The Boss

It had been a whirlwind of a week, getting her own room with new clothes and an actual bed, people who seemed to care about her, three meals a day and a completely stocked kitchen and someone to follow that wasn’t a complete psycho.

That was the good stuff, that was what kept her going. That and if she wanted to be the world's strongest Huntress it was probably a good idea to train under a actual huntsman, and who was training the human equivalent of a Fire Dust Bomb. While Vernal didn’t consider herself Branwen anymore, the ideals didn’t fade.

‘Nature has only one rule; The Strong owns the Weak.’ Her old mentor’s words came to her again.

Vernal scowled. ‘So much for being the strongest huntress there is.’

Her time at the Arc House had really opened her eyes toward how big the world actually is. 

Raven was strong, really strong. She was a former Huntress and Beacon Alumni, she was fast, strong, high aura levels and control, along with a versatile semblance that made long distance travel her bitch. All of that, to top of all that, to just further put herself outside of the realms of warriors and huntress and huntsman she had Maiden Powers, fucking magic.

But, she lost, not just, because there's always either a hard counter, or a bigger fish, that wasn’t the only reason. Despite her power, despite her being the most notorious criminal in Mistral, despite her experience, she lost...

Because... because...’ Vernal thought. ‘She’s a coward.’

Vernal had seen her kill before, huntsman, brave civilian, or Grimm, or even other tribes. But, never from anything other than a position of power, she always waited till there was a moment of weakness to strike, less warrior more assassin, and if things got too tough she’d whip out her Maiden Powers.

More often than not, when more than one hunter came after them, Raven would have them move out. Saying, “They're too weak for us to bother with.” Now, Vernal was sure it was just her cowardice… Like her inability to stick around with her real family.

Why she took Vernal in to begin with. 

‘Because, she’s a coward… I’m just a replacement, so she doesn’t have to think about…’

The time with the Arcs had definitely taught her that there was more to strength than fighting ability, and Raven was lacking in conviction, the thing Mr. Arc and The Boss had spades.

The Boss was way stronger than anyone she’d ever met, in terms of Aura and physical strength, yet his sisters, mother, those two lackeys of his, and his own father weren’t the least bit afraid of him.

They had conviction, that they knew their family.

Darkness be damned, those two lackeys could even put up a decent fight with him.

The oldest Arc child, Gris could even match her little brother in raw strength for a little while and even hold him down, even if he got up right afterwards. 

Then there was Mr. Arc, if his son was a dust bomb, an all direction and all consuming blast of destruction, then he was a high powered, high precision plasma beam. Not as powerful, sure, but no less dangerous or devastating when used correctly.

Mr. Arc was still teaching his son and his two lackeys… and Vernal even. His skill, aura manipulation, and physical conditioning was insane. Sure, he didn’t have even a tenth of her Boss’s reserves, but he had more than twice Ravens, and he had the skills to manipulate it like it was just another limb of his body.

He could probably beat Raven if he wanted to, and didn’t lack the courage to stand his ground.

Actually, Vernal was entirely sure he could, considering he was fighting her little monster of a Boss right now, and controlling the fight handily.

Mr. Arc practically danced around his son, as the boy tried to land a hit on him, swinging wildly and kicking up small windstorms as he did so. The boy got nowhere close to landing a hit on his father, as the man anticipated blow after blow, stepping out of his son’s range and enduring the shock-waves his son released with practiced ease.

He stepped into his son’s range and stuck his leg out between his son’s moving feet, tripping him, then shield bashing him in the back and sending him flying into the ground. The Boss bounced off the ground, leaving an indent where he hit it, and landed on his back.

The Boss got back up, his face red, and smashed his practice sword into the ground, breaking the ground where it landed, sending boulder sized clumps of earth into the air, Arthur Arc deflected and evaded the earth as it flew at him. Redirecting the earthen shrapnel back at his son with small controlled bursts of Aura Deflection.

The stones and dirt clumps being flung back at the speed of bullets and pelting The Boss, making a show of light when they hit his aura, the light bursting from his aura and creating ripples on top of it.

Mr. Arc was fast too, he moved from one position to the next like he was teleporting, Vernal couldn’t track his movements, his sword striking precisely into The Boss’s chest faster than Vernal could see, Vernal only being able to track his movement based on how The Boss was being knocked backed and where his Aura was flashing, and then with one last lightning quick slash The Boss was knocked onto his back, Arthur stomping his foot onto The Boss’s chest, putting his blade on the boys neck.

“Another victory for me, son,” Arthur said, smirking. “If you had less aura than you did, I could take your head off.”

Jaune pouted, struggling fiercely under his fathers boot, his own strength only barely lifting his father’s foot. Showing off the man’s immense strength as he barely budged, the strength of a real Hunter, and despite how much strength his son had, it didn’t matter if he couldn’t get any leverage to take advantage of it.

“I’ll beat you one day.” The Boss said, red faced and sweating.

“Yes, I’m sure you will.” Mr. Arc smiled. “But, first you got to land a hit on me.”

Vernal wasn’t sure if that was normal father-son conversation, but her definition of normal had long since been warped.

Arthur took his foot off his son and pulled him up. “Good for another spar, son?”

The blonde boy nodded, and then tried to pull his father into a headbutt, but Arthur didn’t budge and then flipped The Boss over his shoulder into the earth.

Vernal would watch late into the evening as the father-son sparred, taking notes mentally on what worked against The Boss for when she’d have to spar with her boss again. He may be her boss, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t give it her all in trying to surpass him, he deserved nothing less than a subordinate who was useful.

The Arcs told her she was priceless, but the only way Vernal knew that she had value was by proving it, and the only way she could was by fighting.

------

Three Months later.

-----

Three Arcs step off of a bullhead, all immediately throwing up their lunches on the ground.

“The family curse, haaah, it strikes again.” Arthur said, being the first one to recover.

“That it does, that it does father.” A platinum blonde who was nearly as tall as her father said putting her hand on her father’s shoulder for support.

The father and daughter watched as Jaune continued to puke his guts out all over the ground, the curse was particularly bad on the youngest, and it truly was a curse, as neither aura manipulation, meditation, or medication helped in the slightest. It was as though the sky’s and heaven’s had a grudge against the Arcs.

Eventually though, they all recovered.

Arthur grabbed both children by the shoulder. “Alright, I trust you two to remember, why, I brought you two with me on a mission.”

The platinum blonde nodded. “You said, I needed more field experience, especially in foreign environments and learning in person was worth more per hour than a day in class could ever teach…. also I forgot father’s day and this is my way of making up for it.”

“That’s right, Gris.” Arthur said with a smug smile.

Gris looked at her only brother. “Why’s he here?” Pointing at the blonde boy next to her.

Arthur smiled nervously. “Because, if neither of us is home to watch him, we won’t have a home when we get back.”

Jaune was fast asleep on his feet, a small stream of drool leaking from his mouth, and loudly snoring.

Arthur pulled his son into his arms, holding him securely and tossing Gris the boy’s luggage.

Gris nodded. “That is a fair point, but why not take his groupies too?”

“Because, I already have enough to worry about with Jaune, who is more than likely going to put someone else in our family by force before we head home, and those two are enough trouble by themselves and I don’t want them picking fights or causing trouble on a mission. Your mom, with her semblance, can handle them no problem, even less so with Vernal.”

“Fair enough, let's get going… What’s it called again?” Gris said with a tilt of the head.

Arthur hummed. “I think it’s called Kuroyuri, apparently rumors of an abnormal grimm have appeared. Something more than the local Hunter can handle.”

===

It had taken a couple hours of walking, through exotic forests and mountainous trails, but the Arc trio managed to make it to Kuroyuri a little after lunch. The Arc boy still sound asleep during the trip, being swapped between his father and elder sister as the situation demand, even when being carried up sheer cliffs,  when they were fording through shallow rivers, or the many fights between the Grimm, Bandits, and Aura Animals on the way to Kuroyuri, nothing of which way enough to prompt his Aura sense that there was enough danger to wake him up.

The Father and Daughter duo were thoroughly famished, and immediately beelined it to the first restaurant they could see, ending up running over to have lunch at a local tea house, Kazehana or something to that effect, The Arc duo were many things, linguist is not one of them.

The Arc’s sudden entrance to the Tea-house was quite sudden, the waitress quite shocked to see two hunters and a sleeping child look at her with a terrifying hungry expression. Needless to say they were quickly seated and served.

 Arthur and Gris finished their meal, several plates of local noodles, boar meat, and some local plants, letting out a satisfied groan of fullness, looking up while stretching and Arthur making eye contact with one Li Ren, the local hunter who requested a seasoned Huntsman investigate the rumors of an abnormal grimm.

There was a moment of eye contact, Arthur’s mind slowly grinding out the details, before realization sets in. His eyes widen and waves the man over with highly animated gestures, pointing down at an empty seat on the floor.

Li Ren stoically processed the actions before calmly making his way over to the table, taking the empty seat. In a matter of moments they were sitting, discussing the details of the contracts, over a cup of steaming tea, while Gris watched and observed, noting important details her father might miss and studying how her father negotiated and asked questions, weaning information out.

“So how long ago was this Grimm sighted?”

“Two or three months ago, It was sighted in the aftermath of a fallen village to the southeast with a horde of Grimm making its way out of the ruins.”

“Hmm, any possible thoughts on it’s species or is it a aberrant?”

“I have talked with those who have observed it from closer, they have described it as being around fifteen meters tall, with a equine bottom half, resembling a fully formed Uma Sama and Elder Imp like grimm’s torso growing from it’s mid back, the sight being quite… disturbing, it seems quite old having many battle scars and weapons stuck inside of it…. I do not know of any species it might belong too, but its too familiar to be a aberrant, Sir Huntsman.”

Arthur frowned, wrinkles creasing his forehead. “This is quite concerning, have you reported this to Haven?”

Li Ren scowled. “We of Kuroyuri, founded it in an attempt to escape Mistrals… less than savory nature, this did not make many friends or allies when we left, any attempts to have contacted Haven have been met with silence.”

“I’ll contact Beacon when I return, this behavior is unethical and unbecoming of a Huntsman institution.” Arthur said, his facing taking on a dark and stormy expression.

The talks between the two men then fade into the background as two children walk into the establishment, an orange hair girl and a black haired boy walk in, only to see their father talking with a blonde headed man, the orange hair girl sighs then spotting a sleeping blonde next to him her father and zips over to him and starts poking his cheek.

Ren sighs and goes to try and stop her from causing trouble, only for the blonde boy to casually wake up and slap her across the room and outside into the street.

The room goes silent in shock, as Jaune rises up yawning, Ren just stands there horrified, Arthur, Gris and Li all looking shocked for different reasons.

‘Did he do it? Did my son just kill a girl by accident?’

‘If he killed that girl, that means we’re probably going to have to waive the fee, and it’ll probably go on Jaune’s record,’

‘Damn-it Nora, how many times do I have to tell you to keep your hands to yourself!?’

Ren though, while horrified, was also quite awed. Nora was the strongest kid in town, he had never even seen her winded outside of training with dad, and she hit him hard enough to break his aura in just two to three hits, and it took him dozens of hits to just bring her down.

This blonde boy just socked her out of the room!

Nora laid on her back, a manic smile on her face. A tingly numb feeling all across her body, with some kind of scratchy feeling beneath the numbness. Awesome. Her aura never felt so low before, outside of Papa Ren fighting her in training. Nora’s aura felt like it was more than half gone!

Nora's smile didn’t fade as she contemplated the sheer strength behind, it didn’t just knock her around, it sent her flying! How far could he make her fly? 

“Jaune,” Arthur said to his son. “Please go make sure she’s alive?”

Jaune yawns, and rubs his eyes. “Who? Did I hit someone?”

“Yes.”

He nods “Ok.” Then he walks to the person with a damaged aura signature outside.

Nora looks at the boy in awe, as he looks down at her. He knees down and puts a hand on her cheek where he hit her. “Pain pain, go away.” Then a surge of light overtakes Nora, and her aura is completely restored and then some.

“Who are you!” Nora says, grabbing Jaune by the shoulders and putting her faces really close to his making intense eye contact.

“I’m Jaune.” The boy says pushing her away, her breath smelled like syrup, and it was making him hungry.

“I’m Nora and this is my brother Ren!” She said dragging the boy over to her brother who still was processing the fact that his sister had just got slapped out of a building.

Jaune thought they didn’t look anything alike, but then thought about his new adopted sisters. Realizing that Nora must have adopted Ren, he nodded.

“Oh cool, he’s like my sisters.”

Nora nodded. “Yeahs my brother, but not my brother-brother, but we’re blood-brother and sister, because we cut our hands and shook hands!”

Jaune’s eyes widen, and made note of what to do when he got home. He had to make sure his sister were has much of his sisters as possible.

“You’re really strong! Want to be friends? Wait, wait, I have a better idea, you want to be me and Ren’s new blood brother?”

“Sure!” Jaune didn’t really have any friends outside his family, he looked at Ren. “Can we be friends too? I mean blood-brother?” 

Who needs friends when you have family!

Ren looked at his feet nervously, the idea of cutting his hand again didn’t appeal to him, but nodded anyway. Nora hugged them both. “That’s his way of saying, yes!”

The three adults looked at the children in amusement, Li and Arthur sharing a knowing look.

“Feel welcome to stay in my home for the duration of your contract.”

“That would be great.”

Gris couldn’t stop smiling at her little brother and his new friends. “They're so cute!” Taking out her scroll and snatching several photos as Jaune and Nora, plus Ren got to know each other.

Only for the adults to scream once Nora brought out the knife and tried to cut their hands.

------

After the knife incident, and Nora finding out she couldn’t open Jaune’s hand no matter how hard she tried, they finally managed to settle down.

An Ren immediately took a shine to her children’s new friend and easily welcomed the Arcs into her home. Despite the fact the two other Arcs and her husband were scarcely in the house as they went out looking for the abnormal Grimm. Taking the time to spoil Jaune and her children, eventually managing to slip them all into matching Yukuta before letting them slip out to play for the afternoon.

Arthur and Li took several days to locate the Grimm, traveling around Kuroyuri looking for tracks and trails to indicate where it was, Gris traveling on the further outskirts acting as a scout.

During that time Jaune had spent all his time playing with Nora and Ren, investigating all over town, now that they’re dads were gone they were going to explore a mountain near the town.

“Be careful in the mountains. Also don’t stray too far into the forest or the lord of the mountain will eat you!” The old man said as Jaune walked into the forest, Nora and Ren followed him.

Ren and Nora followed behind Jaune, grabbing his long kimono sleeves. The kimono was something his eldest sister and Mrs. Ren and the Village girls managed to force on him in his sleep last night.

“What’s the lord of the mountain?” Jaune said, swinging his practice sword in front of him crushing through the brush and tearing up anything in front of him, but also creating a cool breeze behind him that Nora and Ren took advantage of.

Nora laughed. “It’s just a stupid folktale, beside I heard there’s really tasty peaches out in the forest.”

Ren sighed, tugging on Jaune’s sleeves. “Actually it’s a tale about a dangerous animal that lived on the Mountain centuries ago, long ago a there a enormous wild boar that lived on the mountain, the king of a nearby city wanted  to take the mountain, but no matter how many solider he sent none ever came back, so the king himself went, and came back wounded, he declared no man may ever rule over the mountain, as it had its own Lord. The Lord of the Mountain.

An electric look went through Jaune’s eyes, “Awesome, do you think we can find it?”

Ren looked nervous though. ‘This isn’t going to end well…’

A couple hours passed, as the trio totally wandered around the mountain before somehow ending up at the top of the mountain, which instead of peak it hosted a large depression that sunk several dozen feet into the width of the mountains top, home to only wild grass, boulders, some bushes, a large grove of peach trees. 

Nora elbows Jaune, smirking. “See I told you there were peaches at the top.”

Jaune snorts. “Yeah, but you haven’t proven that they were tasty yet!”

Nora frowns. “Fine, I’ll race you over there, and I’ll show you how tasty they are!”

“Fine!” Jaune said as he sprinted towards the peach trees, with Nora hot on his trail.

Ren however, felt quite nervous, as something was making his Aura sense crawl. This place was weird to him. He walked around, trying to find the source of the weirdness here.

He wadded through the waist high grass, noting the grass that had some large passage through it that neither Jaune or Nora caused. Nature trails all over the top.

Then he found it as he walked over to the grove. 

Skulls and bones, all over the ground, shattered into pieces and fragments, and the roots were all over them. The tree had been eating the bones.

Ren felt his blood turn cold, as he noticed the rusted and shattered weapons all over the top now that he looked closely.

He quickly looked around for Jaune and Nora, seeing them eating peaches from the tree in the center. Despite how happy they were, they had to leave now.

Calmly as he could, somehow managing to make himself feel numb, the world taking on a slightly muted color, he walked over only to feel the ground shake behind him. Dust and dirt falling behind him, and the warm breath of air on his neck, on the high mountain top. His calm disappeared.

“Jaune! Nora! This is the Lord of the Mountain’s lair!”

A scream from behind him, pulled Jaune and Nora out from their fun to see Ren on the ground before a huge boar.

Jaune and Nora stood in awe of it for a moment, before Nora realized the danger and ran to protect Ren, Jaune close behind her.

However, he couldn’t help but be awestruck by the big piggy behind Ren that was absolutely leaking aura, it almost had as much as his dad did!

It was also so cool looking! It’s fur was black and thick and hairy! Like it was made of black iron. With one blood red eye and one milky one with a scar going over it. It had a bunch of scar actually, over its sides and on its neck. Jaune bet it fought a bunch of strong guys and piggies too. And it’s tusks were ginormous! Like instead of growing tusks it grew two clay-mores instead!

Jaune put his hand under his chin. Could he tame it? Only for him to scowl as the foul smell of the boar fell over to him. ‘It needs a bath. Otherwise, mom won’t let me keep him.’

“SQUUUUUEEEELLL!!!” The Lord of the Mountain bellowed at the three children who invaded it’s lair as it stomped the ground and got ready to charge. 

Only for it to take notice of Jaune, it’s eyes further narrowed in rage, it was the one who had been stinking up it’s mountain with his aura, now dared come into its home! The Lord of the mountain bellowed out of rage and challenged the boy in front of it, then charged forward intent on brutalizing the boy who dared leaked it’s smelly aura all over his mountain. The one who dared to wake him with his offensive smell. It’s beady eye then saw the discarded peach pits on the ground.

It snorted in pure wrath, they dared to eat it’s sacred peach! The one’s that granted The Lord his longevity?! He would grind their bones into dust for his grove and rend their flesh off their muscle and have the rain’s dance with their blood!

The pitch black boar’s singular working eye glowed with a diabolical spirit, as then blood-crimson lightning sparked over it’s black fur, as it galloped it legs forward in blinding speed, going ahead like a black missile, barreling at the seven year old with all the force of a runaway train. Jaune in a split second decision grabbed Ren and Nora, tossing them into some nearby bushes as he was hit hard enough to be sent flying away, the impact turning making the sky around them shake, the light exploding around them nearly blinding them as Jaune disappeared.

Nora and Lie Ren watch in horror, shivering silently as the boy they just befriended, their new brother flew into the mountainside impacting it with a blood-chilling crunch. The pair’s eyes went wide as they went into shock.

The rock-face shook, and the pig squealed in triumph as Jaune seemed to have been defeated.

“That was mean mister piggy, I don’t like mean people.” Jaune walked out from the dust and shattered rocks falling around him surrounding his impact sight, the rocks bouncing off his aura, and looking no worse for wear, if anything he looked incredibly angry.

His golden aura burned around him causing his clothes to float on etheric currents. The boar snorted at him and bellowed again, unimpressed, in it’s long, long life, it had defeated many opponents, from aura users, to soldiers and bandits, to warriors and huntsmen, and even centuries ago the king of this valley and his army, what was one child to his many fallen foes?

The Lord of the Mountain snorted again, summoning it’s lightning to coat him, and then shot it at the insolent child.

Jaune saw it all though, the sneer in the animals eyes, and the hostility riding it’s aura, and the deathly intent in the creature's semblance. It was all too easy to read it and step aside from where the red lightning hit next to him.

With a flourish Jaune then unsheathes his training sword holding it defensively, ready to fight the old boar.

The Lord of Mountain’s tusks glimmered menacingly in the evening light.

Nora and Ren held their breaths hoping not to give away their positions.

Clank! Klink! Crack!

The boar charged into Jaune, with Jaune blocking the beast with the flat of his sword, being pushed back several feet. The boar lashing out with it hooves that almost knocked Jaune flat before deflecting the blow, it’s tusks swiping at him only to be ducked under, and finally it tried to bite him in half, only for Jaune to hit’s teeth with his sword in a silver flash.

Bzzzzt!

The boar’s fur began to stick up on end as currents of electricity gathered across its body, collecting between its tusks briefly, then exploded in a blast of lightning at Jaune.

Jaune’s eyes went wide as a column wide blast of lightning was shot at him knocking him onto his back spasming, mere feet from Nora and Ren.

The boar saw an opening and charged at him coated in auric lightning power, Nora saw it all in slow-motion, Ren’s heart seized with fear and tried to stop Nora, but she moved faster than she ever moved before grabbed Jaune to pull him out of the way, the boar only grazing him, but still blasting bolts of electricity as it brushed them, a wayward zap hit Nora, knocking her onto her back, Ren quickly running to her side as his sister was laid out on the ground smoke drifting off of her.

The boar gave a evil look at the children as it turn around and charged at them, only for the boar to be punched in the nose before it could run them over. The huge animal reeling back, as it was knocked back, Jaune then rose up, smoke rising off of him, then he jumped up and socked it. Anger in his eyes, as he grabbed the blade of his sword and hit the boar in it’s head with the hilt, sending it rolling across the ground and into the trees, destroying several in the process, Jaune then chasing fast behind it.

As the Lord of the Mountain and Jaune continued to fight, Ren was trying his best to tend to Nora, only he couldn’t figure out what was wrong with her as she kept laughing. “It tickles Ren! It Tickles!” Then jumping up onto her feet, grabbing the largest branch see could find then running at Jaune and the Lord of the Mountain.

The Lord of the Mountain and Jaune had fought from the forest line back into it’s den, leaving a trail of destruction and broken rocks behind them, the boar discharging lightning at him and Jaune summoning orbs of Aura to take the blows instead of him, several bright aura orbs orbiting around him at high speeds.

Lightning collects on the boar again, making the boar too bright to look at, wayward bolt striking everywhere blasting Nora back again, as it disappears behind a veil of electricity, then faster than the children’s eyes could follow, the boar flashes out towards Jaune in a series of brutal hits, only for him to deflect every blow in a shining silver strikes, with is Aura taking the blows he couldn’t deflect. 

Then in a matter of moments the fighters became invisible, until an ear-splitting shriek cut the air in two, as a shock-wave cut the air in two, razor sharp winds shearing across the air, cutting all the around in a twenty foot circle in half.

The Lord of the Mountain was breathing heavily, blood-seeping from it’s mouth and nose, mighty as it was, boar weren’t built for this kind of fighting, while Jaune staggered around erratically as electricity stilled flashed over him, his hair standing on end and smoke waffering off of him. Jaune with as much aura as he has, was just as vulnerable to electricity as any aura-user, especially to one such as the Lord of the Mountain, who had honed it’s semblance in many battles, he could heal yes, but the effects on the body were noticeable and quite damaging.

The fighters met eyes with each other, a brief contact, but one that conveyed the tangible amount of respect they had for another.

The Lord of the Mountain scraped the ground with it’s hooves, gathering more of it’s semblance than it had ever before, collecting the red power into its prized tusks, turning them into glowing red and white sabers of energy that zapped with lightning around them.

Jaune held his sword with both hands in low stance, his sword’s tip pointing at the ground behind him, four aura orbs floating around him then one after the other they circled around the blade faster and smaller, till the blade was obscure in white and gold colors.

The two fighters charged, they met, they clashed.

All was still, all was silent, they froze meeting like a still frame image, the small blonde boy wielding an equally small sword meeting a building sized boar in a charge, clashing together, it would look comical if not for the serious look on boys face and the obvious power being thrown around, and the wrecked environment around them.

The clash held for a scarce moment, then the world caught up, as light overtook the senses, followed by an all encompassing boom that echoed across the providence like thunder, that nearly deafened Ren and Nora. Finally was the bone-cracking snap, as the victor was decided.

For a brief moment Jaune and The Lord of the Mountain became visible, the sword biting into the fangs, the rotating sheath of aura diverting the condensed semblance back into lightning bolts around Jaune digging a foot deep furrow for tens of yards behind him. Then,

KA-CRACK!

As the Lord of the Mountain’s tusks were broken in two. The two ivory natural weapons spun in the air and then stabbed into the earth, still crackling with its power, and blood leaking at the base of the shattered ivory.

The Lord of the Mountain thrashed about wildly as it’s mind was overloaded with pain and phantom sensations.

Jaune frowned sadly at it. His dad’s voice then echoed in his head. ‘Never disrespect your opponent with mercy if they come to kill you, give them the warrior’s end. Its the end they deserve.’

Ren and Nora could only watch in awe as Jaune then ran at the Lord of the Mountain, stopping it’s wildly flailing with a running sideswipe at it’s head, knocking it onto its side. Quickly he grabbed a broken tusk holding it firmly, holding the beast still he aligned his blunt sword with it’s eye with a lightning quick motion he plunged his sword, followed by his entire arm, and then part of his shoulder deep into through its eye into it’s head. Completely obliterating it’s brain, and the top of its spine.

In an instant, he broke its aura, cutting’s life away in one ending move.

The beast shutters weakly in pain, once, twice, and then never again.

Jaune frowns as he puts his foot against the head and kicks off, pulling his arm out in a spray of gore, showering the forest floor in red, pink and grey. He then swipes his sword through the air, in an attempt to remove the boar viscera off the blunt sword.

Nora and Ren looked on at Jaune, unable to take their eyes off of him. HIs movements were like nothing they had ever seen, powerful, without mercy, terrifying, and awe-inspiring. They fell to their knees without hesitation, bowing before the great one before them.

“Teach me, oh great one!” Nora said, suddenly latching onto Jaune’s leg. “Show me the way, so that I might break enemies! Those that would be unworthy of you!”

Ren hugged Jaune’s waist. “Show me the ways to manhood, Great Master!” Looked up at him. “Allow this one to have the power to serve you, and protect those I care for.”

With a casual pat to their heads. “Sure, you’re my brother and sister, right?” He said, with a bright smile and face dripping with blood.

Ren and Nora could only hug tighter in excitement, this would be the beginning of a long, long, and deep bond.

--------

It had taken most of a day to get to the creature’s lair, but it was well worth it.

Arthur had Gris play interception, leaving her to fight any Grimm that tried to attack Arthur and Li as they fought the Nuckaleeve as they found it was called.

Gris watched in amazement, as she finished the last of the fodder grimm, cutting a deathstalker in half with her zweihander, as her father and Mr. Li Ren fought the Nuckaleeve.

While Li Ren did not have much power behind strikes, he could shoot dozens of arrows near instantly, laced with some type of dust or another, and could easily dodge the blows that the Nuckaleeve tried to hit him with.

Her father just kept proving why he was the patriarch of the house, as he matched the monster blow for blow, overpowering it and laying it back as Li Ren froze, burned, and electrocuted it’s limb.

Till Arthur finally knocked it to the ground and sawed off the horse like head off the abomination as Li sniped the head off the top of the thing they called a Nuckaleeve.

Arthur stretched as he popped his body. “What a work out, haven’t fought something that strong in years, even if it was a little disappointing.”

“A little much for me,” Li said, taking a seat. “I would prefer it if I never had to see something like this ever again.”

Arthur shrugs. “To each their own,” He then smiles at the man. “How does it feel to longer have that monster hanging over your head?”

Li gave a wide smile. “Like a boulder has been lifted from my shoulders, ah, it feels like I just regained ten years of my life back. My Ren and Nora, will now be able to grow up in relative peace, hopefully.”

Arthur gave him a pat on the back, nearly knocking the man onto his face. “They will grow up in peace, if you ever have any other trouble, do not hesitate to call the Arcs.”

Li’s eyes started to water, but he quickly rubbed them away. “Then, I suppose there is one thing I have concerns about, in your time here in Kuroyuri, have you heard of the Lord of the Mountain?”

--------

Arthur couldn’t be prouder of his son if he tried as he lugged a two story tall boar through the town square whilst that little girl Nora shouted out a story that would probably fit right in with a Mistralwood movie, the boy Ren giving out details to smooth the story along.

“The Lord is dead, the Lord of the Mountain has died!” An old man shouted.

“It was real?”

“I thought for sure, that the old man was full of shit!”

“I’m not that old! I'm forty five, I just smoke a lot!”

“You should really quit, it’s bad for your health.”

“If I wanted your opinion I’d bloody well ask for it! Anyway the Lord of the Mountain is dead!”

Arthur gave his new friend a sly look. “So, about that problem… I don’t think you need to worry about it.”

Li grabbed his head and shook his head from side to side, a tears of happiness running down his face. “I suppose I do not.”

He rubbed his face dry, then grabbed Arthur by shoulder. “Tonight we party! Kuroyuri is safe again, and these are our champions! Tell the mayor we are celebrating tonight!”

Cheers erupted around the plaza.

--------

The party lasted for several days, as the news made its way around the neighboring villages who went to join and congratulate the Arc’s and the Ren Family.

Positivity at an all time high, fun was had, merriment too, but all good things come to an end.

A Bullhead sat on the outskirts of the village, which was being loaded up with gifts, and some of the remains of the Lord of the Mountain.

Nora and Ren clung fiercely to Jaune, tears running freely down the trios face.

“I don’t want you to leave!” Nora dug onto him tightly

“You’re our brother, don't leave us!” Ren buried his head into the blonde boys shoulder.

Jaune was silent, despite his teary eyes, then he flicked them both on the head. “Quiet! You’re my brother and sister, aren't you going to be strong?”

The two shut up filled with shame.

“This isn’t me leaving, this is me going somewhere else, I’m going to be back and stronger than ever, so don’t think I won’t be back! I would never abandon by brother or sister, so don’t insult me by saying I would leave you forever. So, promise me you two will get stronger, so when I come back we can go on more adventures, promise me!” Jaune looked at them firmly, his eyes still red and puffy.

Nora dried her eyes, and Ren blinked away the tears.

“Yeah! I’m going to get stronger than ever, if you don’t come back I’ll break your legs and bring you back!”

“I’m going to be a real man, Jaune! I’ll show you how strong I can be, so you better come back, or we’ll track you down and bring you back with us for good.”

Jaune looked strong for a moment, then broke down in tears again and hugged them tightly. “I’ll miss you guys.”

Gris looked at them through her scroll, recording the whole thing.

“Couldn’t we, you know, take them with us? We already got the other three groupies, what are two more?”

Arthur swatted her head, “I’m a serial adopter, not serial kidnapper. Anyway, I like Li enough, but not enough to steal his kids, so no, I’m not taking his kids.”

Li gave him a narrowed eye glance. “I’d prefer to keep my children,”

An Ren then carefully puts away a kitchen knife. “I’d cut a bitch, if you tried.” An Ren then smiles. “Anyway, the Arcs are always welcome in our home, you three better come back soon with the rest of your family.”

Arthur gulps, but nods. “Yeah, the misses wouldn’t forgive me if I didn’t take her here. So, will come once I get the children settled.”

Gris smiles. “We’ll be back for the junior Mistral Regional Tournament, Dad wants to put Jaune in it. Thinks it’ll be funny.”

Arthur looks off into the distance. “Damn right it will.”

It took some effort, but they separated the children, and loaded up the Bullhead flying home.

------

The three Arc got off the Bullhead onto the Arc Estate, then promptly emptied their stomachs.

The curse striking hard, the one thing the Arc will never defeat.

Airsickness.

#The Adventures of Shota Jaune #Jaune Arc #Lie Ren #Papa Arc #Nora Valkyrie #Li Ren #An Ren #Arc Sisters

[brandywine-tomatoes]

Omega's Sixteenth

99 FOLLOWER SPECIAL!!

Masterlist

Characters: The Bad Batch + Omega, Rex, Hera

Prompt/Inspo: #2 from my list: Cross teaches an older Omega how to use a rifle.

TW: blaster shots (to the armour, everyone's fine), it's just a lot of banter and family shenanigans

Word count: 1857

QUICK NOTE: just a bunch of fluff. This'll be a two or three part deal, so Cross actually teaching Omega how to use his rifle will come.

NO BETA, WE DIE LIKE CLONES

--

“Hunter, where we going?” Omega shouted ahead of the running group. Her hands were tightly gripped around the gold energy bow with a purple bolt already in place.

“Keep going!” He yelled, farther back down the hallway with the rest of the Batch.

Omega didn’t think her sixtieth birthday would be spent raiding an Imperial base for information, but there she was, dodging blaster bolts from circular corridors and laying down cover fire for the Batch who were looking for a way out as they ran aimlessly around the sky compound.

The skull embroidered bandana around her forehead kept her brown hair from her face as the customized armour weighed her down. She backed against a wall, peering down a corridor and quickly sprung back from the sizzling bolts whisking by.

Omega jumped from her spot and rolled away from the laying shots, pulling back the bowstring rapidly to take down the KX-series security droid. She was still on her knees with her bow outstretched as her team rounded the corner.

She stood, rolling her shoulders and pointing to the window at the other end. “We could jump.”

“And get squished like pancakes?” Wrecker sounded uneasy through his helmet. “No thanks, I’ll take the stairs.”

“We have KXs inbound,” Crosshair interrupted.

Omega walked to Cross’s position, the sniper offering his fire puncher for her to see. The scope looked through the walls and picked up the movement of what looked like a whole platoon of droids. “Shit.”

“Language!” Hunter raised his voice.

“No, I agree. We’re in deep shit.” Cross took back his rifle.

“Omega’s right, the window is our only option if we value our lives,” Tech looked back at the group from the circuit breaker he was fiddling with on the wall.

A duo of security droids came around the corner, blasting away. The Batch dove for cover around both corners, Crosshair, Hunter, and Tech across from Omega and Wrecker.

Omega and Hunter counted down to sync their defence and Omega’s bow was shot into another corridor as soon as she tried to let lose an energy bolt. She jumped back in shock and shook out her hands.

“You okay, kid?” Wrecker shouted over the blaster fire.

“I’m fine, but I don’t have a weapon!”

“Catch,” Crosshair sounded from the commlink wedged in her armour.

Crosshair threw a spare blaster across the hall with expert precision, Omega catching it with one hand and flying out into the fire of the droids. After a couple missed shots, she sent them both to the ground in a sparking heap.

Hunter ran from his spot against the wall and checked Omega over.

“Did they hit you? Are you injured?” He asked frantically.

“What is it with you guys? I’m fine, only a shot in the armour,” she shrugged Hunter’s hands off her shoulders. A fleeting look of hurt passed over his face before relief.

“We don’t have time, they’re rounding the corner,” Crosshair’s voice flooded through the comms.

“You could do what you did on Skako,” Echo looked down the corridor to find Cross firing an offence.

“Not enough time.”

Omega started down the hall towards the window, picking up speed. “The window it is!”

“Omega wait! We have to wait for the ship!” Echo shouted.

“We’re going to be blasted to hell if we wait! Tell them to hurry up!”

She heard Echo’s frantic chatter on the comms and the group’s heavy footfalls bouncing off the round steel walls as they followed her lead.

As the security droids rounded the corner, Omega was pushed through the tinted glass by a bolt to the back, tumbling through the air before landing face-first on the wing of the Havoc Marauder. She flipped herself onto her back and groaned, watching the blaster fire shoot out the window before, one by one, the batch landed on the wing. Their pilots kept the ship steady and flew off in a hurry once everyone had a hold.

If Omega wasn’t shot twice in the armour, she would’ve laughed blissfully as they flew through the fluffy orange clouds, holding out her arms as the moisture-created little droplets running off the armour plates and slicking back her hair. Instead, she laid there on the wing, holding on for dear life and hoping the moisture wouldn’t loosen her grip.

“You okay?” Hunter yelled over the rushing wind to Omega.

“Stop it!” She growled back.

Echo put a hand on Hunter’s shoulder. “Kids are like this when they’re older, it’ll pass. Don’t get hung up on it.”

Hunter only nodded, putting on his stoic face and looked ahead into the clouds.

--

Once they were far enough away from the Imperial compound, the Havoc touched down on a hill in the middle of a rolling prairie. Blue skies with fluffy clouds surrounded them and the plain landscape.

The Bad Batch slid off the wing, Omega refusing Hunter’s help, and waited for their pilots to extend the steps.

Hera exited the ship first, shouting that she was going to kill Omega for her ridiculous plan and started chasing the brunette. Omega took off in a sprint, yelling that it wasn’t her fault while laughing her head off. The Batch started taking bets on whether Omega would outrun Hera or not and cheered the kids on.

Rex watched the madness ensue, leaning against the door frame with a smile. A fleeting and pained memory of Anakin and Ahsoka at the start of her padawan days passed through and his smile dropped, his light mood dampened. He couldn’t let go of family so easily, but it only made it more painful to go on each day without them.

“We should probably get out of here, Sargent. Imps will be crawling all over the planet,” Rex retreated inside to the co-pilot's seat.

“Alright, pack it in guys! Onto the ship!” Echo shouted to the girls far off in the distance.

Omega sprinted up the steps, gasping for air while Hera held a smile on her face, her breathing barely obstructed. She saw the confusion and the team’s heads turning from the ship to her.

“I was track star at my school, 100 meters in 5 seconds,” she said proudly and climbed into the ship.

“Who knew?” Hunter remarked.

“You would if you paid attention to your kids,” Crosshair smirked and boarded the ship with the rest following.

“I do pay attention! You got something you want to say, Cross?”

“Of course not, Sarg.”

--

“Thank you for your hard work, Sargent Hunter,” the rebel cell leader’s recorded message projected on the dash. “You will be fairly compensated and given your next mission in two weeks. Enjoy this time off, there won’t be much more.”

Tech shut down her hologram and looked to Hunter in the seat behind Rex. The rest of the crew waited for their leader’s next order. They hadn’t had two weeks off... ever. The most clones got was a weekend, Omega was constantly working with Nala and then going on missions, and Hera had been training as a pilot or busy with school and family. Even their droids were never shut down for more than a day.

Wrecker scratched the back of his neck. “What are we doing, Sarg?”

Silence.

“Hunter?” Omega piped up from the shared seat with Hera.

“I’m thinking,” he waved them off.

Crosshair scoffed playfully and went further back into the ship. “That’s a first.”

“It’s already pretty tight in here,” he started. “I say we touch down on a planet, enjoy the peace for once.”

Hunter saw Hera visibly deflate and Omega put an arm around her shoulder.

“You can fly the ship, Hera, but only with one of the adults around,” Hunter added in defeat. She bounced in her seat and started talking with Omega excitedly, pressing a button on the armrest and spinning the seat around back to the stars.

“Where are you thinking?” Rex asked, silently praying for no god damn desert planets.

“I don’t know. Tech, any ideas?”

Tech pulled up his trusty datapad and started furiously tapping at the screen.

Crosshair had returned from the poor excuse of a kitchen with two soda cans and strolled smugly through the aisle to Hera and Omega. He sat on the floor, his back resting against the console, and gave the soda over to the kids. They jumped excitedly, not knowing there was any more of the fizzy drinks left, and swiped them from his hands. They filled him in quietly on what they were conversing about as Crosshair gave the rest of the crew a shit-eating smirk.

“I didn’t know we had any soda left,” Wrecker whispered to Hunter across from him.

“We don't.”

“This is why he’s the favourite, isn’t it?” Rex leaned to the side towards the two.

“He did this all the time on Kamino when we were cadets. It got the others off our backs.”

“I just hid in the ceiling panels,” Rex snickered.

“You weren’t always ‘mister beloved of the GAR’?” Echo shoved the captain's shoulder from his place against the wall.

“Hell no. Pretty sure Cody was part of the ‘fuck Rex squad’ at some point.”

“I think we all have seasonal membership cards.”

“Hey!”

“So there’s Mantessa,” Tech interrupted with the list of planets. “A thick jungle planet with a fiercely predatorial native species called the panthacs. They kill quite efficiently in their home environments; I’d quite literally commit murder to get documentation of their-”

“Tech, we have kids on board,” Hunter stopped him. “Maybe something more... vacation-y?”

Tech glared at him. “Vacation-y isn’t even a word-”

“Tech.”

“Fine fine,” he dismissed the idea, a little saddened that Hunter shot it down so eagerly.

“Mimban is largely unexplored and has a very turbulent atmosphere as well as energy storms in the stratosphere. It would be quite the learning experience for Hera to-”

“We aren’t looking for learning experiences, we’re looking for a break,” Echo said.

“You all have ridiculous standards,” he mumbled, scrolling to the bottom of his list. “Numidian Prime. The syndicates have been known to use it from time to time, but with the Empire extending it’s rein, it shouldn’t house too much trouble for us. There’s a very interesting bird species-”

“Tech.”

“I swear it’s habitable and without predatory species that would rip us to shreds,” he dismissed Hunter’s insistence. He tossed the datapad carefully on top of his satchel in the corner. “I think I heard a friend having a camp there, a Calrissian. He’ll let us stay.”

“How do you know?” Rex asked.

“He’s never there.”

Hunter clapped his hands, getting everyone's attention. “It looks like we’re vacationing on Numidian Prime.”

Hera, Omega, and Rex went to work on plotting their course and getting them to lightspeed while the Batch strapped in for the ride.

“After you,” Rex gestured to the console.

“Why thank you, Captain,” Hera smiled and pulled the hyperspace levers back. The ship stopped for a second and shot forward into the stars, a tunnel of churning light making way for the Havoc.

Omega sighed blissfully, sitting back against the seat. “This never gets old.”

--

I haven't posted any fics in 11 days, I really just needed to get something out for y'all.

ALSO

I reached 99 followers yesterday!! Well, it's 101 now, but thank you all for giving me a chance at sharing my love for Star Wars. It's you that makes this possible! I know I have a lot of improving to do when it comes to writing, but I'm so incredibly happy that you're giving me a chance and following along on my journey!!

Part 2 will be up soon (I hope), stick around for that! I post basically every day and I'm constantly online!

More fics of mine!

A War Without a Winning Side (Ahsoka, Rex, Maul series)

One of the Bad Ones (female!oc and Crosshair [platonic])

Only the Beginning (Cap. Howzer Part 1 (part 2 linked))

Hope was a Dangerous Game (male!oc and Crosshair [romantic])

Lightsaber Trials (fluff)

And here's my masterlist for more!

#the bad batch #tbb #bad batch #clone force 99 #star wars #sw #hunter #echo #crosshair #omega #tech #wrecker #rex #captain rex #hera syndulla #hera #lando calrissian #han solo #star wars rebels #sw rebels #the clone wars #tcw

[mysterioushogwartsrequests]

Ceremony (Smugglers, Part 5)

Hello everyone! I am so excited to finally be posting Part 5 of The Smugglers Series! I am so sorry to keep everyone waiting for so long, but I really had a creative stump when it came to continuing this, but I finally figured out the structure. This will be the fifth installment of this seven-part series, the next parts will center around their honeymoon and the Battle of Hogwarts. 

This piece is extremely long and I tried to shorten it, but after all the waiting the fans of the series have done, I couldn’t bear to leave anything out. I started writing Smugglers on a whim about two years ago after reading a Tumblr post and I cannot believe how much this story and this blog have grown. I owe you guys everything and I cannot wait to keep putting out work. I apologize for the long wait, but I went through a painful writer’s block regarding this story and I am happy to be releasing it.

Smugglers Series: Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV

Taglist: @a-sweet-little-fangirl | @homowillraise | @fanfable

Just in case anyone was interested (and for my own visualizations sake) I compiled a picture of the wedding, maid-of-honor, and bridesmaids’ dresses, along with pictures of the various bouquets written in the story. If you guys would like to see them, please let me know! 

Anyways, enjoy the long-awaited continuation of “Smugglers: A Charlie Weasley Fanfiction”

Romania. November 30th, 1994.

The Romanian Dragon Sanctuary was home to an array of dangerous species. The dragons held there ranged from both manageable and potentially deadly. But amidst the potential dangers, foul-smelling cages, and bitter weather, a certain couple spent their final month before they finally moved back to their shared home in Scotland. 

Charlie Weasley, renowned Dragonologist, and fidgety husband to be proposed to master Gringotts Curse-Breaker (Y/N) (L/N) during the 1994 Quidditch World Cup surrounded by their family and friends. Encouraged by the outbreak after the cup and the realization that war could break out at any moment, the two worked quickly to organize and finalize their wedding. 

But before going forth with their wedding, Charlie and (Y/N) were finishing up their tasks at the Sanctuary. The workers had safely transported the four dragons utilized in the first task of the Tri-Wizard Tournament back to Romania and they all settled comfortably into their respective nests. Luckily for (Y/N), her last mission reeled in far more gold than the Goblins had expected, and granted her some time off, which she gladly took to spend some time with her fiancé. She was truly enjoying her time at the Sanctuary, although she never encountered dragons while on her trips, she hoped that the information she learned from Charlie and his colleagues would prove useful in the long run. Charlie, on the other hand, spent his early mornings caring for the newly hatched Peruvian Vipertooths and his afternoons patrolling the grounds ensuring the dragons were safely secured for the night. Ever since his departure from Hogwarts, Charlie had spent most of his time studying the various dragon species held at the Sanctuary. During his stint there, however, he had never witnessed the ferocity of baby Vipertooths. 

The nonnative Vipertooths were having a difficult time adjusting to the brutal cold of the Romanian countryside and Charlie worked day and night to ensure they survived. Although quite small, the dragons posed a large threat to whoever handled them due to their poisonous bites and their intense, unsatisfiable craving for human flesh which Charlie – charmed by their adorability – almost fell victim to them the first couple of days they were in his care. 

The Sanctuary workers were in full swing, carefully preparing for the upcoming blizzard. Steady tents erupted near the dragon nests and each worker was tasked with creating protective barriers around them to protect any of the eggs and their mothers.

Back on Ridgebit Rock, (Y/N) trudged through the snow with a clipboard in hand and studying the contents of the wooden crates lined up along the center. Charlie pulled the collar of his jumper higher, hiding the lower half of his face in the turtleneck as he called out numbers to his fiancée. (Y/N) had grown accustomed to the hectic environment and considered the sanctuary a second home so she couldn’t help feeling nostalgic as they finished up the final task. 

She looked around the surrounding forest, closing her eyes and breathing in the crisp cold air, shivering as a gust of wind blew past them. “I’m going to miss this,” she spoke up, clutching the board close to her chest, “You’ve spent so much time here, it feels bittersweet to leave it behind…” She understood that to grow, one must move on, but it was unusual to have their time at the sanctuary come to an end. 

“Me too,” replied Charlie, gazing towards the heated tent that held the small Vipertooths, “I wonder if the Dragons will remember us when we’re gone...” (Y/N) giggled, cut off by a sneeze as another gust of wind blew through the forest. Charlie glanced over at his fiancée, his heart swelling at the tinge of red that spread across her nose and cheeks. “You’re cold, aren’t you?” He asked while (Y/N) blew hot air into her gloves, attempting to cover her reddening nose.

Charlie smiled sweetly, removing his scarf, and wrapping it around her to shield her from the cold breeze. He gazed at her face with admiration, running his thumb across her cold cheek as she leaned into his gloved hand. 

“A little,” She admitted, setting down her clipboard and quill and slipping her hand into Charlie’s with ease, “But, I hope they remember us,” responding to his earlier statement while gazing over the hill where some of the dragons were kept, “They’ll be taken care of here and we can always come to visit.” (Y/N) grinned, squeezing her fiancé’s hand, “I’m sure they’d love to have their best Dragonologist back, not to mention their most handsome one.” 

Charlie hummed in satisfaction, “You’re absolutely right,” He replied, pulling her in for a tight hug and pressing a kiss against her cheek, “We’ve done a lot here and I never properly thanked you for staying by my side” He muttered, his fingers playing with her hair as they embraced. 

“And why wouldn’t I, Mr. Weasley?” (Y/N) teased, “After all, we said ‘til the end of the line our fourth year, remember?” 

All the adventures, family outings, dangerous vault discoveries, and, of course, all the travels that helped them grow as a couple. The two had spent years together, watching each other go through the awkward stages of adolescence and all the hardships that came along with it. From the moment they met, they had each other’s back and although that fact did not need to be confirmed by a ceremony, they knew it was the next big step in their relationship. 

“And soon we’ll be saying, til death do us part” Charlie added sweetly, pulling her scarf down and quickly stealing a kiss from her.  (Y/N) smiled against Charlie’s kiss, placing her gloved hands on his cheeks, and pulling him in before pulling herself away from his grip, “But we need to finish taking inventory” she joked, picking up her clipboard from the crate and tapping her quill against it. 

“Always so determined,” he replied, rolling his eyes as he attempted to pull her back into his grip and laughing as she ran down the snow, “Let's finish up so we can head home” Charlie smiled, catching up to her and pulling her along the Sanctuary. 

Scotland. November 30th, 1994. 

The warmth of their home quickly enveloped them as they stepped out of the fireplace, the green flames dying down at their feet. Although it was still rather chilly outside, it was nothing compared to the weather in Romania. 

The two walked around the ground floor of their home, hanging up their coats and scarves in the entrance closet. Their usually tidy home had papers scattered over the countertop, along with different types of flowers, silverware, envelopes filled with wedding invitations, and other materials necessary for their preparations. 

(Y/N) sighed at the mess they left behind. Planning a wedding proved to be more difficult than breaking curses at Hogwarts, and she always worried she would miss something essential while they prepared. 

She rounded the kitchen counter, sorting the letters the owls had deposited at their house while they were away. Their wedding date was approaching fast, and the thought of their big day eased her worries but amplified them simultaneously. 

(Y/N) tore open one of the letters, her eyes scanning over the neat cursive with a subtle smile on her face. 

Dear Cursebreaker, 

(Y/N) Selwyn, I wanted to reaffirm how honored I am to hold the position as stylist for this special occasion. I’m sure you’ll recall our previous correspondence where I told you not to stress about any of the fashion choices for your wedding. But knowing you, you’ve spent hours tearing through magazines trying to find the perfect wedding dress and bridesmaids’ dresses.

But I am a man of my word and I intend to provide one of my best friends an eye-catching gown with bridesmaids’ dresses to match. I have enclosed the finalized – and colorized – sketches of your wedding gown and the dresses the girls will be wearing. I’ve included three options for your dress and two for the bridesmaids’ dresses. You’ve never mentioned a maid of honor, but I designed a variant just in case you picked one without informing me. 

Write to me as soon as possible so I can finalize the preparations. If all goes accordingly, your dress should be finalized before Christmas. 

I hope you’re intending on wearing a tiara, I think it would tie everything together and I included them in the drawings so you could visualize it. In all honesty, I truly think this is my best work as your style-Wizard and I expect some well-deserved credit at your reception. 

All jokes aside, take a look at the dresses and send me your response, along with the measurements of your selected maid of honor and bridesmaids. Also, tell Charlie to write back as soon as possible. I sent him his dress robes options ages ago and he hasn’t sent a letter back, I should honestly charge him for it. 

That was another joke, I’m not taking any form of payment from either of you. That’s final so don’t even try to debate me on that. 

I can’t believe you two are finally getting married. You don’t know how long everyone has been thinking about this day, I can’t wait to see everyone. 

I hope you and Charlie are well.

Best Regards, 

Your friend and best style wizard in all of Europe, 

Andre Egwu

(Y/N) reached into the envelope and pulled out several pieces of parchment, each containing intricately painted dress designs in various shades of white, silver, and gold with a thin red sash tied around the waist. She smiled brightly at the letter and tucked the contents back in the envelope, setting it in the bin labeled “important” to remind herself to take a better look at them tomorrow morning. 

She turned back towards the kitchen countertop, gathering the letters from Gringotts, as well as notices from the Ministry of Magic, and sorting them into their respective piles. Charlie came out of the entrance closet where he stashed his dragon-hyde boots and the rest of his fireproof gear to the sound of the rustling of papers. Shaking his head, he turned into the kitchen with a faint smile. 

Even after all their hard work in Romania, she still managed to find another task to keep herself occupied. 

“I don’t think so,” Charlie uttered, pulling (Y/N) away from the mess, and gently pushing her against the kitchen wall. Charlie admired her beauty once more, placing his calloused hand on her waist, “You’ve been working all day, I’ll be damned if I see you cleaning this late” He spoke, brushing a strand of hair away from her face. 

“Charlie,” whined (Y/N), crossing her arms with a pout when her fiancé caged her in, “You know we’re behind on preparations,” she explained, placing her hands on his shoulders, and massaging them gently, “And you haven’t replied to Andre, he’s growing rather tense and so are you, it seems.” He caught himself admiring her once again, admiring how easy it was for her to read him. Charlie thought back to their years at Hogwarts and those moments where she would bring him exactly what he was craving for dinner or when she silently comforted him, even though he had not spoken about what bothered him. And even though he immediately eased up under her touch, his goal to keep her relaxed was unshakable. 

“You, my love,” hummed Charlie, running his thumb against the apples of her cheeks, “Are going to take a nice, warm bath while I make you dinner.” (Y/N) smiled up at Charlie lovingly, wrapping her arms around his waist and nuzzling her face in his broad chest, “What if I want you in the bath with me?” She asked playfully, her hands sliding down his waist and into the back pockets of his work trousers. 

Charlie chuckled darkly, his hands sliding towards the back of her thighs and lifting her off the ground, wrapping her legs around his hips, “Who am I to deny the lady what she wants?” boasted Charlie, tightly gripping the back of her thighs, and leaning his lips close to hers. 

“Such a gentleman,” (Y/N) muttered breathily, her hands gliding through Charlie’s and her nose brushing against his. Her soft lips brushed delicately against his, close enough so he could inhale her breath and feel the warmth radiating off her skin. Charlie’s heart pounded harshly against his chest; the feeling of her lips so close yet so far sending a subtle shiver down his spine. Understanding why she paused, Charlie closed the gap between them, his lips perfectly molding against hers and she swore she felt time stop. 

It did not matter how many times they shared a kiss, it still felt like that moment on the Quidditch Pitch. That moment when Charlie pushed through the crowds of cheering Gryffindors, the house cup forgotten in the hands of another team member, to pull her in for an electrifying kiss, one that set the course of their loving relationship. (Y/N) was so captivated by their kiss that she did not notice when Charlie expertly moved up the stairs and towards the master bathroom. 

It wasn’t until he set her down on the bathroom sink that she opened her eyes, laughing wholeheartedly as Charlie bent down to open the warm water, his endearing chuckle echoing through the bathroom. 

“You’re quite sneaky, aren’t you?” questioned (Y/N) teasingly, hopping off the countertop and making her way towards Charlie, her cold hands sliding underneath his long-sleeve making him jump. 

“And what does that make you?” He retorted flirtatiously and gripping her wrists, pulling her against his chest, his hand trailing down to the side of her neck. 

“Hm, a demiguise, maybe?” She asked innocently, her eyes shifting upwards in mock pondering and Charlie rolled his impatiently, tugging the hem of her jumper and slipping it off her body. 

“Of course, how could I have missed that? The long hair honestly seals the deal. Although…” He trailed off, his eyes scanning her bare torso and sneaking a hand behind her, his fingers drumming towards the clasp of her bra, “I’ve only ever seen your eyes light up like that when your squirming underneath me–” 

“Charlie!” (Y/N) exclaimed, gaping open mouthed at the blushing red-head and failing to catch her bra as it slipped down her front. She quickly crossed her arms over her chest, hiding her exposed breasts, and slid past her fiancée, “Enough playing around,” she stated firmly, turning her back towards him and unbuttoning her trousers, letting her panties fall on the floor with them and sliding into the warm water, “Get in before I change my mind” She grinned, splashing a handful of water across his chest. 

Charlie scoffed, but pulled off his shirt by the neck, almost tripping over his trousers as he tugged them off with urgency, “Alright, alright! I surrender!” With that, he sunk behind (Y/N), pulling her against his chest and peppering kisses against her cheek. 

The Burrow. December 5th, 1994.

“Oh, my dear!” Cried Mrs. Weasley, tears threatening to spill from her eyes as (Y/N) turned in her wedding dress. Andre Egwu stood behind her, proudly gazing and his handiwork and twisting the red sash so the diamond snowflake brooch sat comfortably on the left. 

“Come on,” Andre crooned, “tell me I’m a genius” he prodded with a smirk, stepping back to stand beside Mrs. Weasley with his hands stuffed in his pockets. 

(Y/N) rolled her eyes, but turned to admire herself in the mirror, “I’m going to have to admit it this time,” she acknowledged, looking back at the satin train of her A-line gown, the tails of her red bow falling shorter than it, “You truly have outdone yourself, Andre. I really can’t thank you enough” 

Mrs. Weasley dabbed her eyes with her apron, sniffling as (Y/N) spoke, “You look radiant, (Y/N)! Charlie is going to faint when he sees you,” she beamed and walked to her, pulling her in for a tight hug. 

“But I still think you’re missing something,” Andre chimed in, drumming his fingers against the old brown box sitting on the bedroom dresser, “Like we discussed, Mrs. Weasley?” He added and (Y/N) raised a questioning eyebrow as Mrs. Weasley scurried to the desk and opened the box, shielding its contents from the soon to be bride. 

“It was Auntie Tessie’s wedding tiara,” Mrs. Weasley spoke up, beaming as she faced (Y/N), the sparkling headpiece held delicately in her hands. 

(Y/N)’s jaw almost hit the floor. Of course, she had expected Mrs. Weasley to pull out all the stops for their wedding, but she never thought she’d be hiding such a luxurious piece. 

“Mrs. Weasley– You can’t mean–,” stuttered (Y/N), shaking her head vigorously and her eyes jumping from Andre’s grinning face to Mrs. Weasley’s loving smile. 

“I do, dear,” she reassured, beckoning for her to come closer, “Andre sent me the letter when you picked your wedding dress! Of course, he didn’t know I would have the perfect piece to tie everything together, but Auntie Tessie left this behind when she passed and she especially fond of Charlie,” she began to explain, gazing down at the tiara and turning it to set it on (Y/N)’s head, “She wanted his future wife to wear it down the aisle. If that’s alright with you, of course.” 

(Y/N) turned to face the mirror once again, but this time focusing on the five sparkling rubies in the crystal tiara, “I don’t know what to say,” she forced out, overwhelmed with emotion at the sight of herself in a wedding dress, “And, yes. I want to wear this tiara, are you having a laugh?!” She exclaimed excitedly, tears welling up in her eyes as she threw her arms around her future mother-in-law, “You’ve been nothing, but kind to me all these years. I don’t know how I could ever repay you.” 

“My dear,” sniffled Mrs. Weasley, “How many times must I tell you? Charlie is the happiest I’ve ever seen him and that is all because of you, (Y/N)” she explained honestly, her hand rubbing up and down her back as they embraced, “All these years, he’s only spoken about you. How you make him feel and how important you are to him.” 

“Mrs. Weasley–”

“I think it’s high time you started calling me Molly, dear” interrupted Mrs. Weasley, pulling out of her embrace and holding (Y/N)’s shoulders tightly, “You’re going to make a wonderful bride, my darling” 

(Y/N) let out a small sob, her arms wrapping around her fiancé’s mother once again, “Thank you, Molly” she whispered, wiping her tears away and smiling down at her as tears streamed down both their faces. 

“I hate to interrupt,” Andre chimed in from behind them, the grin still evident on his face, “but I think we should get (Y/N) out of that dress before Charlie ruins the surprise.” 

The women nodded in agreement and (Y/N) removed the tiara, handing it to Molly, who returned it to its velvety cushioned box. 

“I’m going to go work on dinner, I’ll see the two of you down there in a bit,” She announced happily, exiting the room and descending the stairs to her kitchen. 

“Andre–” (Y/N) started, holding her friend by the elbows, “I have to find some way to repay you. After all these years– I mean, you made my first date outfit for Godric’s sake and you’ve never let me pay you once–”

“And I never will.” he retorted defiantly, “Your friendship is far more precious than some stupid galleons,” Explained Andre, placing his hand on her cheek, “You helped me find my passion in fashion design, you and McNully taught me how to become the best Keeper Ravenclaw house had ever seen and,” he paused, shifting around so she could look at herself in the mirror, “even though we’re not at school, you invite me to all your adventures and Ministry events. You and Charlie have given me so much and you don’t even realize it.” 

Andre took a step back, holding (Y/N)’s hands in admiration, “You deserve the very best on your wedding day, and so does Charlie. I’m just glad I’ve been along for the ride, but if you’re so adamant of repaying me,” he grinned, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes, “Save me a dance the day of your wedding, that’s all I ask for.” 

The waterworks came once again, (Y/N) let out a small sob as she threw her arms around her long-term friend, “Of course, Andre,” she agreed, her voice wavering while they embraced, “Thank you so much for everything.” 

Andre smiled, his hand resting at the back of her head, “Anytime, Cursebreaker.” He muttered, “But we should get you out of that dress, I need to fix Charlie’s dress robes before dinner.” 

(Y/N) nodded in agreement and stepped out of his grasp, watching Andre head towards the door, “Make sure he doesn’t look better than me!” She joked as the door opened and Andre let out a hearty chuckle. 

“Wouldn’t dream of it!” He shot her a wink and slipped out of the room, the door closing gently behind him and his voice booming down the stairs while he yelled for Charlie. 

(Y/N) laughed when she heard Charlie’s startled yell and the door to his bedroom slamming open. Her hands slid down the soft satin of her dress, the rhinestone straps glinting as the sunset over the horizon and the ghost of a smile decorating her relaxed features. 

“Only a month away,” she thought joyfully and hung up the dress in its black garment bag before joining Molly in the kitchen. 

Scotland. January 5th, 1995. 

Wedding preparations were in full swing at the home of Charlie Weasley and (Y/N) Selwyn. The family of the bride and groom ran up and down the house, folding the seating arrangements and fixing any stray flower bouquets that remained in the kitchen. 

“George!” Bellowed Mrs. Weasley as he and Fred slid down the bannister, their ties around their heads and vests unbuttoned, “You two better straighten up before the guests arrive!” 

“Molly dear,” Mr. Weasley spoke up from behind her, his hands running down her arms soothingly, “They’re just excited, I’m sure they’ll settle down soon” 

Mrs. Weasley placed her hand over her husband’s while the other soothed the velvet of her elegant green dress, “I’m sure you’re right, Arthur. I just want everything to be perfect for Charlie and (Y/N)’s special day.” 

“I know, Mollywobbles,” he muttered, pressing a kiss against his wife’s forehead as she blushes furiously, her cheeks turning as red as her hair.

“Come now, Arthur,” she urged, but unable to fight the smile that formed on her face, “Let us go finish up the tent” 

Outside stood Charlie, running up and down the wedding tent, yelling orders to his younger brothers who had, apparently, never seen this side of Charlie before. 

“No–! Percy!” He groaned, straightening the ribbon against the back of it, “Over and under, like this!” Charlie twisted the ribbon, leaving a delicate bow to decorate the pearl white chairs. 

“I am perfectly capable of tying a ribbon, Charles.” declared Percy pompously, demonstrating his bow-tying skills on the next chair, but struggling a little more than Charlie had. 

Charlie let out a small sigh, adjusting his tie and the lapels of his red and black dress robes, “I know,” he admitted solemnly, “I just want everything to be perfect, (Y/N)’s spent so long planning this–” 

“Don’t worry,” Percy interjected, “With William and I here, everything is bound to go smoothly.” He grinned, placing his hand on his older brother’s shoulder, “We’re the most responsible and we’ll make sure everything goes smoothly, for you and (Y/N)” 

Charlie sighed, but this time out of relief, his arms wrapping tightly around Percy, “Thank you for being here, Perce. I know it wasn’t easy to get time off.” 

Percy let out a small scoff, “You think I would miss my brother’s wedding? Mr. Crouch’s cauldron bottoms can wait until after the ceremony, even though it’s rather painful to put off my work for this long.” 

Charlie fought back the urge to ruffle his brother’s hair, “When did you get so grown up?” He asked playfully, “I still remember you killing spiders for Ronnie.” 

Percy rolled his eyes at his remark, but smiled nonetheless, “We all grow up eventually, Charlie. Just look at today, I could not be prouder of you and I know Mum and Dad are too.”

Charlie thanked Percy with another hug, but their moment was interrupted by Bill, who was waving his wand towards the marital archway, making light silvery roses appear in between the bright red ones, “Oi! Guests are arriving in twenty minutes, we’ve got time for friendly chats later, but we really need to get everything together before they apparate!”

Percy nodded in agreement, striding down the silver carpet and clearing out a path through the snow, raising another set of tents from the entrance of their house towards the wedding tent. Charlie joined his brother near the archway, clapping him on the shoulder and waving his wand so the rest of the flowers appeared on top of the seat ribbons. 

A gaggle of women hid inside the master bedroom on the second story of their home, a half-empty champagne bottle resting on the vanity with six empty glasses surrounding it. Six girls stood around the bedroom window, gazing down at the boys in the garden with wide grins, “This dress is quite beautiful!” exclaimed Rowan Khanna, turning to examine herself in the mirror, “Andre truly has outdone himself!” Her dress was slightly different than the other girls. It was still made out of the same silver fabric as the other ones, but her’s contained an array of silver crystals covering the left side of the bodice while a ruched one-shoulder sleeve came up and around her right shoulder 

“I agree,” chimed in Penny Haywood, twirling around in her floor-length silver dress, “I can’t believe the day is finally here!” she squealed. Her dress also contained a ruched one-shoulder strap but lacked the bodice crystals in favor of a criss-cross fabric belt around her dress, “Tonks! Stop messing with it!” 

Nymphadora Tonks shifted in her seat as Penny attempted to soothe her bright pink hair, which she had grown out to shoulder length for the occasion, “It looks too neat!” complained Tonks, ruffling her unnaturally straight hair, and curling the bottoms of it with her wand. Tonks and Tulip were wearing the second variation of Andre’s dress, it contained the same details as the others, the only difference being the two straps in contrast to the one-shoulder Penny and Merula wore. 

“I think it looks quite nice,” muttered Merula Snyde, gazing at her straightened hair, “Don’t you think this color brings out my eyes?” She asked absentmindedly, her hands running over the chiffon gown.

“Oh, please” groaned Tulip Karasu with a grin, “That’s what you said during the Celestial Ball!” 

Merula glared towards Tulip, “And was I wrong?” she asked, throwing one of the satin dressing gowns they wore while getting ready. The two girls broke out in a fit of laughter, launching the dressing robes at each other and dodging them swiftly and the other bridesmaids joining in until the sound of the bathroom door opening caught their attention. 

“Merlin’s beard,” gasped Rowan at the sight of her best friend standing underneath the doorway, an angelic glow radiating off her, “(Y/N), you look–”

“Breathtaking,” finished Merula, her lips curling into a devious smile, “Weasley is going to lose his mind when he sees you.” 

Penny nodded in agreement, rushing to (Y/N)’s side and taking her by the hand, “I promised you I wouldn’t cry, but I honestly think I am going to break down during the ceremony.” admitted Penny, and the other girls joined her around the bride. 

“You guys,” (Y/N) smiled sheepishly, gazing around her friends, and pulling them all in for a messy group hug, “I can’t believe this is actually happening,” she admitted, a sniffle resonating through the room as she pulled back, “And you’re all here, what more could I ask for?”

“How ‘bout a sack of galleons from your boss at Gringotts?” joked Merula, slapping (Y/N)’s arms and laughing along with the rest of the girls. Rolling her eyes, (Y/N) returned Merula’s slap with one of her own and stepped towards the vanity table to add the finishing touches to her hair. 

“Oh! Let me help you,” exclaimed Rowan, rushing behind (Y/N) and picking her wand up from the table, “I’ve spent hours reading hair-spell books, I want to be the world’s best Maid of Honor!” She ran her fingers delicately through the curls of (Y/N)’s hair, waving her wand and uttering an incantation so a thin stream of hairspray sprayed out of the tip. Unlike ordinary hairspray, this magical substance would ensure the curls stayed intact even if she stood in a hurricane zone. 

(Y/N) smiled at Rowan through the mirror, fighting back the tears that were welling up in her eyes, “Rowan, I’m so glad you’re here, I still remember when we first met and the wonderful scarf I picked out for you” 

Rowan laughed as she sprayed another curl in place, “I still have that scarf, it was approved by Andre and everything so you should start calling yourself a style-wizard as well.” As the two best friends reminisced, Penny and Tonks were opening the brown-leather box, gaping at the tiara with admiration and carefully wiping it with polish to amplify its shine. 

“Some guests are arriving,” Tulip announced, looking out the window with Merula, the two of them craning their necks to see the small group pass through the snow led by Percy and Molly Weasley who bore wide grins. 

In the sitting room, the groom and his groomsmen gathered around the kitchen island, six glasses of firewhiskey resting on the countertop, “No, I-I really shouldn’t” Charlie pleaded, raising his hand out to block the shot glass his best-man, Andre, was forcing into his grasp. 

“Just one!” urged Andre, wiggling the glass in front of him as Bill and Barnaby raised their own in celebration, “(Y/N)’s had her champagne! I saw the glass, I promise!”

“I’m even having one, Charlie!” added Ben Copper, raising his glass to meet Barnaby and Bill, earning a laugh from Jacob Selwyn as he rounded the corner of the island, his own shot glass in hand.

“Charlie, I know you and my baby-sis talked about it and in all honesty, mate…” started Jacob, his eyes scanning Charlie’s tense behavior, “You need to loosen up a little, I saw you yelling at chair ribbons before the guests arrived.” 

The groomsmen laughed, earning a small scoff of amusement from Charlie, “Alright, alright!” He boomed, snatching the glass from Andre, and raising it into the circle with the rest of his men, “But I’m making you all take three at the reception!” 

“That’s fine by me!” cheered Barnaby Lee, “We don’t have drinks at work; they’re all a bunch of prats really” he jested, gazing at the firewhiskey bottle longingly, “I’ll do however many you want!” 

“Enough talking! To Charlie and (Y/N)!” bellowed Bill Weasley, flashing a toothy smile while Jacob patted Charlie’s back encouragingly. Jacob’s relationship with (Y/N) had strengthened significantly as years passed and although he loved having a younger sister, a part of him always wanted a brother. And, after months of getting to know him, finally found one in Charlie. 

The groom and his groomsmen down their shots, slamming the decorative glasses down on the countertop and filing out of the house, excitedly patting Charlie on the back as they urged him out the front door. Several minutes later, the girls, in their matching silver dresses, came down the stairs excitedly waving their red and white bouquets. 

(Y/N) came down the stairs, her dress and veil trailing behind her as she gripped the banister, her other hand carrying her much larger bouquet which contained a set of additional black roses mixed in with the red and white ones to match with Charlie’s robes. With the guests settled in their seats, Jacob ran back into the house and past the curtains dividing the tent connected to the front door. 

“Look at you...” He gaped, his eyes wide in admiration when he finally caught sight of his little sister in her wedding gown, the sparkling tiara sitting perfectly atop her head, “I wish Mum and Dad could see you.” added Jacob in a whisper, reaching for her hands and smiling softly as their eyes met. 

“Me too,” added (Y/N) earnestly, “We’ll visit their grave before the honeymoon, it’s not much, but it’s the least we can do.” She proposed and Jacob nodded in agreement, squeezing his sister’s hands while she spoke. 

“I’ll tell you this, though,” chuckled Jacob, sneakily glancing out the tent as the music started, “I’m surprised Charlie isn’t sweating bullets, he looks more nervous than that time he asked for my permission.” The two siblings broke out in a fit of laughter, heading closer to the door as, unbeknownst to them, the wizard officiant began making his way down the decorated aisle, waving happily at the guests. 

“It’s almost time,” muttered (Y/N), butterflies fluttering in her stomach as they stood behind the icicle wedding curtains, “Oh my god, I’m getting married.” She could feel the nerves overcoming her excitement, a small lump forming in her throat as she worried about the many things that could go wrong, one being tripping down the aisle. 

“Hey,” Jacob spoke out, turning her by the shoulders while Charlie and Andre strode confidently down the aisle, the soft violin accompanying them as the sound of cheering whistles followed after them. “You, my dear sister, have dealt with cursed ice, magical ciphers, loony and manipulative professors, and  – not to mention –  spent the last few months taking care of hordes of dragons. The most dangerous creatures, according to the Ministry registry,” He explained comfortingly, his hands running down the side of her arms, “I think you can walk down this aisle and meet the man you love, and more importantly, who loves you without anything to worry about.” 

(Y/N) bit her lip at her brother’s words, throwing her arms around him and pulling him into a tight hug, “Thank you, Jacob,” her voice wavering, “Thank you so much.” 

Jacob rubbed her back comfortingly, looking over her shoulder to see the bridesmaids making their way towards the archway, “Anytime, baby sister. Anytime.” 

“But” he added, pulling away from their hug and grabbing the first layer of her veil, pulling it over her face with a gentle smile, “I think Rowan is about to walk down and the only tears I want to see are Charlie’s.” Pressing a kiss against her cheek, Jacob turned his sister towards the curtain, bright smiles pulling at their lips. 

Charlie stood nervously at the archway, conspicuously twiddling his fingers as the song changed and the icicle curtains were pulled open by an unseen force of magic. At the sound of the change, Charlie looked up and as soon as he met (Y/N)’s gentle expression, all his worries slipped away, and his mind blocked out everyone else at the venue. 

He wanted to burn the image of (Y/N) in her stunning white dress into his memory. A sight he had been dreaming of since their one-year anniversary, one that surpassed the vision of her during their first date or the ones of her during the Celestial Ball. As she was led down the aisle by Jacob, Charlie made a mental note to thank Andre with the largest slice of cake or some-kind of present because this was, honestly, the perfect gown for (Y/N). 

The dazzling white pleated crisscross sweetheart neck bodice fit perfectly, the red sash around her middle accentuating her waist most breathtakingly. The small snowflake brooch on the left side of her sash sparkled brilliantly, matching perfectly with the delicate rhinestone straps that fell delicately over her shoulders. His eyes trailed upwards, his grin faltering at the sight of Great Auntie Tessie’s tiara underneath (Y/N)’s veil and he finally took notice of the tears that spilled out of his eyes. He hastily wiped them away, stepping down towards the carpet to meet (Y/N) and Jacob a few meters from the archway. Charlie grasped Jacob’s hand tightly, giving it a stern shake before taking (Y/N)’s hand delicately into his own, leading her in front of the officiant. 

Charlie held both of her hands, looking her over and sighing in amazement as he pulled the veil back, exposing her flushed face and the dazzling tiara, “You look–” He breathed out, unable to find an appropriate word to describe how incredibly gorgeous she looked.

“Breathtaking?” She finished with a mischievous gaze and placed a kiss against Charlie’s cheek who blushed furiously as they turned towards the officiant. 

“Ladies and gentlemen,” said the sing-song voice of the officiant who raised his arms in acknowledgment to the couple as a collective silence fell over the crowd, “We are gathered here today to celebrate the union of two beautiful faithful souls.” 

The wedding guests watched avidly, some moving towards the edge of their seats with intricate handkerchiefs as the couple turned sideways, their hands intertwined. 

“Do you Charles Septimus Weasley, take (Y/N) Selwyn to live together in marriage? to cherish in friendship and love today, tomorrow, and for as long as the two of you live, to trust and honor her? to love her faithfully, through the best and the worst, whatever may come, and if you should ever doubt, to remember your love for each other and the reason why you came together with her this day?” 

Charlie was nodding eagerly before the officiant had even finished his spiel, tears streaming down his face but an unwavering smile decorating his freckled face, “I do. More than anything in the world.” 

(Y/N) beamed back at him, squeezing his hands tightly and releasing them momentarily so Charlie could slip the wedding band onto her finger. The officiant turned towards (Y/N), the smile on his face widening as he opened his mouth to speak. 

“Do you, (Y/N) Selwyn take Charles Septimus Weasley…” the words floated away from (Y/N)’s mind, she registered the officiant speaking but she could only focus on the man in front of her and how his hands felt in hers. The way his dress robes fit perfectly and how they brought out the color of his bright green eyes. She felt her hand moving on its own to grip the golden band and the words, “I do” sliding past her lips and she recalled it being the easiest phrase she ever had to say in her life. 

The two of them did not register the happy sobs of Mrs. Weasley in the front row or the audible sniffles of Barnaby, Penny, and Rowan beside them. They even blocked out the loud trumpeting noises at the back of the wedding venue that undoubtedly came from Hagrid with Professor McGonagall dabbing her eyes an aura of dignity by his side.

The two of them only returned to the present moment when the officiant uttered the words, “Then I declare you, bonded for life.” With that, a stream of glittering snowflakes came out from the tip of the officiant’s wand, spirling over (Y/N) and Charlie’s heads. 

“Come here,” Charlie practically growled, twirling (Y/N), pulling her in by the waist, and pressing his lips against her. At that moment, it felt like all the planets had aligned to create a timeless- one passionate moment that defined the future of their relationship. Overwhelmed by happiness, Charlie turned his wife in his arms and dipped her in front of the whole crowd, the sound of thundering claps and booming cheers filling the tent while they kissed. (Y/N)’s leg was lifted beside him, stretched perfectly and peeking underneath her gorgeous gown as the heat rose in her cheeks, that familiar sensation of liquid lightning coursing through her body. 

The newlyweds turned upright again, pressing their foreheads together as they laughed and returned to the tumultuous crowd surrounding them. Charlie and (Y/N) raised their intertwined hands and the excited guests rose from their seats, their chairs disappearing only to be replaced by the reception tables and an ample dance floor. Overlapping ‘congratulations’ came from the numerous guests, patting the couple in support as they made their way towards the dance floor with their wedding party. 

“I love you, more than you’ll ever know,” Charlie spoke out, spinning (Y/N) as they shared their first dance, the lights dimming around them as the crowd watched them. 

“I love you so much, Charles,” replied (Y/N), placing her hand on his cheek and leaning in to steal another kiss, “And I’ll spend every day showing you just how much.” Charlie let out a gleeful laugh, spinning his wife around the dance floor and pulling her towards their table once they finished. 

“Mr. and Mrs. Weasley,” a soft voice caught their attention and they both turned to see Professor Dumbledore, McGonagall, and - to both their surprise - Professor Snape standing in front of them. 

“Professors!” (Y/N) exclaimed, “We’re so glad you could make it! We thought with the tournament it’d be difficult to get away-” 

“Nevermind that!” dismissed McGonagall, placing her hand on the bride’s shoulders, “I’m so proud of you and Charles,” she gushed, unlike her usually composed self, a small hint of moisture underneath her eyes, “Professor Dumbledore insisted we attend.”

“Yes,” added Snape in his usual tone, unlike McGonagall, he was devoid of any emotion, “Even I have to congratulate you on this joyous occasion,” he explained, his black eyes scanning over the crowd and back on his former pupil, “It seems Selwyn- or must I say, Weasley, that you have grown into a capable young witch. One Slytherin house was very proud to have.” 

(Y/N), overcome with the emotion of the celebration, wrapped her arms around the Hogwarts Potions’ Master who returned her embrace with a very stiff pat on the back, “Come now, Severus.” Dumbledore added gleefully, his eyes twinkling with excitement, “I’m sure Mrs. Weasley is just happy to see you.” 

Charlie let out a small snort, unable to contain his laughter as Snape recoiled and his wife returned to his side, “But Minerva is right, we are all very proud of you and I am not one to miss a wonderful evening to celebrate love.” 

“Please, help yourselves with food and drink!” urged Charlie, gesturing towards the tables and bar, “We’ll be resuming the dancing shortly, we’re so thrilled to have you here.” He finishing confidently, shaking Dumbledore’s hand who returned his smile with one of his own. 

“Will do,” He agreed with a nod of the head, “We’ll leave you two to it then!” With that, the three Professors trailed off to speak with Charlie’s parents who stood excitedly at the bar. 

“Do you think I went a bit overboard?” asked (Y/N) cautiously once they left, a small giggle overcoming her as Charlie vigorously shook his head, “Are you mad? It’s our wedding day, we’re allowed to go overboard.” He reassured, pressing a kiss against her forehead.

“Well, if that’s the case… I could use a drink,” she whispered coquettishly but was interrupted by their wedding party clearing their throats behind them. 

“Wow, Weasley,” Merula pipped up, “I thought you were an excellent Legilimens, if you were, you could’ve heard us coming from a mile away” she teased with Rowan waving a shot glass as (Y/N) turned around. 

“You’re not allowed to tease today, Merula!” She exclaimed happily, taking the shot glass from her and pulling Charlie along so he could grab his from Andre, “I’m a married woman now! I get a free pass!” 

Merula rolled her eyes but gave in to her request, “As long as you take this drink, I won’t say anything!”

“Who knew it only alcohol to get Merula to lay off?” Barnaby quipped, earning a small punch which hurt her from than him due to the considerable amount of muscle he gained throughout the years. 

“I’m not going to wait any longer!” threatened Ben, raising his shot glass towards Charlie, “Ready?” he announced and everyone raised their glasses in a circle, “To life and happiness!” 

“To life and happiness!” They bellowed in unison, downing the chocolate vodka liqueur and extending their glasses towards Bill, who had hidden the bottle behind his back.

“Charlie did say three!” He announced, replicating the sing-song voice of the old officiant, “So everyone better have an excellent tolerance tonight because we’re celebrating until dawn!” 

Tonks threw an arm excitedly around Penny’s shoulders, almost spilling the contents of their shot glasses but laughing as Bill continued to pour their drinks. 

“You better switch up the drinks then!” Tulip muttered while sniffing the glass, grimacing at the strong scent of alcohol that practically burned her nostrils, “I’m more of a firewhiskey girl.”

“I’m going to have to agree,” nodded Jacob, “Not about the girl part, but I do like to mix things up… I wonder if they’ll prepare my specialty drink at the bar,” he pondered, looking longingly at the bar with a mischievous smirk. 

“On three!” Andre yelled, catching everyone’s attention and he gestured towards Rowan so she could join in on the count down. 

“Three!” Andre and Rowan finished chanting, throwing their heads back and swallowing their drinks before bellowing out indistinct cheers. 

“I know you guys said three-” whined Penny, shaking her hands in front of her glass but it was snatched away by (Y/N) so Bill could pour their final shot, “Oh, come on! At least let me breathe!” 

“You’ll breathe when we eat and dance!” dismissed Tonks, forcing the glass back into Penny’s hands who reluctantly raised it towards the happy couple, “Your turn!”

“Ready?” Charlie asked (Y/N), a dark blush spreading across his cheeks as he felt the early onsets on the alcohol affecting his body, “Let’s do that arm thing we talked about…” he whispered excitedly, pressing soft kisses against her cheek making her giggle. 

“You’re so in love, Mr. Weasley,” She muttered with a small shake of the head, “But so am I” (Y/N) pressed a kiss against his nose and linked her arm around his, “On three!” she exclaimed, forcing her glass as close to her lips as possible. On three, the wedding party downed their third shot of the evening, some of them shivering as the alcohol coursed down their esophagus. 

“Alright, let’s dance!” yelled Ben and Barnaby, pulling the bridesmaids away towards the dance floor to join the rest of the excited guests. 

“If you don’t mind,” interjected Andre, extending his hand towards (Y/N), “I do believe you owe me a dance?” he reminded her, and (Y/N) quickly slid her hand into his. 

“You’re quite right, most notable style-wizard of all Europe,” she replied, shooting Charlie an apologetic look but he only smiled, “Don’t worry,” He reassured, “I’ve got to see Mum and Dad.”

Andre pulled (Y/N) away towards the dance floor, the two of them spinning away towards the middle with wide grins. Charlie joined his family, who overwhelmed them with hugs and kisses, including his thirteen-year-old sister who had traveled with Ron, Harry, Hermione, and Hagrid to be there for the occasion. The rest of the guests danced and conversed excitedly, eating away at the delicious food the white-robed servers had brought to their tables. 

Jacob Selwyn sat at one of the farthest tables, exchanging stories with his sister’s old prefect, Felix Rosier who was accompanied by Angelica Cole, the former Gryffindor prefect. Sometime during the evening, Hagrid appeared in front of (Y/N) and Charlie Weasley in his mole-skin coat and tears streaming down his face, lifting them both up from the ground as he happily embraced the two of them. 

“So grown-up” cried Hagrid, wiping his tears away when he set them down, “I remember when yeh were both this tall” he gestured downwards, replicating their heights during the first-year and the couple nodded happily, red tinges on both their cheeks as the giggled at Hagrid’s remarks. 

The rest of the night went by smoothly, exchanging numerous conversations with witches and wizards they could hardly remember their names of due to the amount of alcohol in their system. (Y/N) was spun around the dancefloor but all of the Weasley siblings, even performing an impressive three-person tango with Fred and George, who seemed to have more to drink than the newlyweds themselves. Charlie was joined on the dance floor by his mother and father, his best man, and, at one point, Jacob who had raised him onto his shoulders at the climax of the song. 

While they were dancing, Ronald Weasley explained his blunder with Hermione at the ball to (Y/N), who automatically dragged him away to the muggle-born witch to correct his mistake and giggled excitedly when she saw the two twirling in a small circle with Harry and Ginny at their side. Some of the guests began to politely excused themselves by midnight, waving the couple off after leaving the gifts at the respective table and heading out towards the garden to the designated disappartation point. 

The celebration did not stop until the first hints of sunlight gleamed over the horizon. At that point, most of the younger guests had retreated inside the home to sleep on transfigured mattresses set up throughout the newlyweds’ home. Rowan and Bill had to forcibly escort (Y/N) and Charlie away from the dance floor since the two expressed their desire to stay until the sun shone above them but kept closing their eyes as they embraced. 

“Come on, little brother” chuckled Bill, winking at Rowan as he pushed Charlie, who continued to hum the processional song, up the stairs. Rowan blushed furiously at Bill’s actions but kept her eyes on (Y/N), who was spinning Great Aunt Tessie’s ruby tiara in her hands at the rhythm of Charlie’s humming, “I’ll have to thank you for that,” whispered Rowan excitedly, gazing longingly up at Bill and successfully getting the couple into the bedroom. 

Bill removed their shoes while they giggled on the bed, exchanging several kisses while Rowan secured the tiara in its leather box, “Think we should help them change?” asked Rowan, turning towards Bill, but quickly realizing the answer to her question. 

“I think that’ll be a no,” declared Bill, running a hand through his hair and extending the other towards Rowan, “Let’s go before we see something we don’t need to see. I think I saw an empty mattress in the room Andre is staying in.” Rowan nodded stiffly, sliding her hand into Bill’s and quickly closing the door behind her, locking the door for good measure. 

On the bed, Charlie shrugged off his overcoat and threw it to the side while (Y/N) pulled on his tie, undoing it and tossing it with the rest of his outfit. His lips mashed against hers, his tongue pushing past her teeth as she gripped his head firmly, locking him in their embrace as she fell back on the mattress and her dress pooled underneath her. 

“My dress,” she moaned against Charlie’s lips and he let out a small laugh, shrugging his dress shirt off and reaching behind for the zipper of her dress, “Of course, we can’t desecrate such a delicate creation,” he mumbled against her lips and lifted her up so she could wiggle out of it. (Y/N) laughed as the cold air hit her body, winking at Charlie as his eyes widened at the sight of the bright-white lacy lingerie she had hidden under her dress.

“Like what you see?” she teased, attempting to wriggle away from his grip, but he caught her by the waist and pulled her onto her back, “Don’t you dare, my darling” growled Charlie, pressing harsh kisses against her neck and pulling her stocking-clad thighs around his waist. 

“I love you,” gasped (Y/N) as Charlie groped her breast, her fingernails digging into his broad back and her hips grinding upwards to meet his, “So so much.” Charlie cupped her cheek, harshly pulling her up to exchange another kiss, not satisfied – no matter how mesmerizing they were – by the previous ones. 

“More,” groaned Charlie, his red-hair falling over his eyes as he pulled away to mutter against her lips, “I love you more” he breathed out, pressing kisses in between each word and pulling his wand out of his trousers, and uttering inaudible silencing charms towards the door. 

The two of them grasped messily at each other, running their hands over each others’ bodies and leaving marks that would surely be visible in the afternoon.

#charlie weasley #charlie weasley x reader #charlie weasley x jacob's sibling #charlie weasley x slytherin!reader #charles weasley #jacob's sibling #ben copper #bill weasley #hogwarts mystery #hogwarts fanfiction #harry potter fanfiction #Smugglers Series #harry potter hogwarts mystery imagines #Harry Potter Hogwarts mystery #tulip kasaru #nymphadora tonks #rowan khanna #hogwarts mystery au #William Weasley #barnaby lee #andre egwu #this was literally eighteen pages... #I went overboard lmfao #i hope yall enjoyed it tho #i was gonna add the smut but it was literally so long already #it probably wouldve hit twenty pages so Im just going to include it in the honeymoon portion hehe

[somepinkthing]

Is edelgard a racist and/or xenophobic? Yeah definitely a little bit. But you gotta frame it in the context that about 90% of the characters we meet are too. Tbh I wasn't aware people really focused in on this aspect of her character until recently. I am not denying or dismissing it, it's an important theme, but for edelgard it's more in the peripherals of her story arc. However, the fact that it exists so casually perhaps makes a point in and of itself

Fodlan is isolationist. It has been isolationist for as long as its people can remember. That has created a mindset that is very distinct amongst people born and raised there. Them vs us. If you are not for us, you are other. Something else. Unacceptably different. That logic applies to broad political topics such as race and to more personal issues as well. That’s the norm of fodlan. Edelgard is not immune to racism; very few in the cast are. We see it in lorenz with his blatant distaste of outsiders. We see it in ingrid with her assumption that people who are different are the enemy, guilty without any proof and guilty to each and every person. We even see it in people like hilda and sylvain, who harbor no ill will but simply don’t think too hard about their actions or attitudes towards sreng or almyra. We see it in how people treat petra like an interesting commodity, dedue like a danger to society, cyril like mud beneath their shoes, and claude like a violent interloper. This is the environment edelgard fits into. That’s not an excuse by any means, but it does provide a certain context for the scale of the issue. The problem isn’t that it’s rare, the problem is that it’s the norm. Xenophobia is so ingrained that even people that might be decent otherwise don’t see the system as wrong

Now, if we are comparing, amongst the lords edelgard is definitely the most ignorant of this issue and, arguably, might not always pay problems outside of the crest system the attention they deserve. On this front especially, she can’t compare to dimitri who has seen the aftereffects of such hatred firsthand. And neither of them will ever know how it is for claude to live it every day of his life. Edelgard is more or less on par with hilda or sylvain. She holds no malice towards people from outside of fodlan and is open to seeing them as allies and friends. She’s even willing to consider opening peace talks with almyra. It's not that she's entirely intolerant, it's that she just doesn’t think too hard about her learned biases and her own position of power. The best example of this? Petra and claude

Edelgard treats petra like a friend and equal but, at no point, does she ever really seek to understand petra’s situation. In her letter to petra before the timeskip, she reminds petra so easily that Brigid is under imperial rule and, in the same breath, tells petra to make her own way and choose for herself. That's where the disconnect comes into play. Edelgard likely meant every word she wrote but given their situations? It’s disrespectful at best and a threat at worst. Edelgard never asked petra what her opinions of the empire are, about her situation, about her aspirations except to compare them to her own, or about brigid at all. Again, their interactions held no malice but it also lacked consideration. It's not that edelgard was being cruel but she didn't understand nor did she think to ask

Then there’s her words to claude in verdant wind and to byleth her paralogue. The irony of criticizing almyra for its invasion when she invaded another sovereign state just last month is not lost on me. And her words to claude in verdant wind? Honestly even if she had never said anything out loud, her attitude towards claude throughout the game more than spoke to her mindset on that front. But I think people latch onto it too much as a sign that edelgard is extraordinarily racist while I feel she was meant to represent a norm in those moments. “You can’t possibly be good for fodlan you weren't raised here,” is an unfair assessment which implies a lot of untrue things about immigrants, but comparatively? Edelgard’s opinion is downright tame and it's entirely possible that she even didn't understand that this is discrimination. I'm aware that claude spent at least seven years intensely studying fodlan's history, customs, and people and that he's more than proven himself as a leader—I'm not saying edelgard's right, don't misunderstand. I'm saying that the takeaway isn't that edelgard is singular in this. Rather, this opinion is fodlan's norm. The point is that even edelgard, who preeches against allowing one's birth to determine their future, would accuse claude of being unfit for a role simply for being born elsewhere and see nothing odd. In her mind, there's no reason keeping an "outsider" out of leadership roles should contradict her ideals. This scene exists to showcase how deeply intolerance is ingrained into all of fodlan's people, not to imply that edelgard is the outlier

Now, there is ofc one other thing that can’t be overlooked when talking about this topic: edelgard’s view of the nabateans. A million things can be said about that. Perhaps the agarthans whispered lies to her that she believed. Perhaps her hatred for rhea blinded her. We know for a fact she at least never knew the whole story. Whatever the reason, edelgard undeniably views nabateans as Other. They are not human, not like us. She heavily implies that they do not deserve to participate in fodlan’s future in part because of rhea’s mistakes, but also in part because they are not human. That they've lived on this earth just as long as the current human race has doesn’t seem to occur to her, only their relation to rhea. And yeah rhea had no right to use the people's faith the way she did and someone should say it, but we know for a fact that rhea isn't the only nabatean. Of the ones we know, only three have anything to do with the church! To decide that all the nabateans are overlords based soley off rhea is... something

The way I see it, edelgard's questionable takes on the nabateans are as likely to be due to xenophobia as it is a mixture of her being understandably angry, her relationship with rhea, the empire's history, and TWSITD's influence on her. However, whatever the case, there's no denying that it's messed up for edelgard to view an entire group of people this way and I know some people don't like CF partially because of this—and that's fair! To me though, it’s another aspect of her character that plays well into her backstory and all-or-nothing viewpoints. As for the rest of it though? If you dislike her for buying into fodlan’s crap about outsiders that’s definitely fair too, but don’t forget that her degree of ignorance is hardly the exception. It is very much the norm and, yes, that statement probably includes some (or a lot) of your faves

#edelgard von hresvelg #fe3h meta #fire emblem three houses #fire emblem #fe3h #long text post #edelgard #its weird to single out edelgard as The Most Intolerant One when #thats a) not true #and b) not the point #edelgard is smart and obsessed with change #edelgard believes in a merit system #edelgard believes in not judging based off what u were born as #... except claude #except the nabateans #almyrans are annoying when they invade #and brigid's situation is a blind spot #the point isnt that edelgard is evil here the point is that #she's never had to challenge these viewpoints #and the issue with the nabateans is ofc highly nuanced but it still def is generalization. which edelgard hates

[schleierkauz]

Q&A Highlights

Ok so bad news first: My questions were ignored. Cornelia did not clarify any of our death-related theories. Maybe next time.

There was A Lot of other stuff, though so... Enjoy!

- The stream starts with everyone wishing us a happy women’s day! Usually women in Erfurt (where the bookstore people are) get flowers but not today because... you know. Cornelia says America is starting to go back to normal, meanwhile Germany... :| Anyway. Don’t look over here.

- Cornelia says she probably won’t get the vaccine anytime soon because she’s just chilling on her farm anyway and people who have to be out in public/are vulnerable should get it first

- Question: When will Cornelia visit Germany again? In response to this, she gives us some exclusive news, not official yet, heard it here first: She’s gonna move to Italy! Apparently she bought an olive farm there which is cheaper, better for the environment (her current farm will be sold to some people who want to turn it into an organic farm) and obviously closer to Germany so she’ll be here more often. :)

- The 4th Reckless book will be released in English at some point this autumn

- There’s no definite release date for TCoR because she’s busy with Dragonrider but she hopes she’ll have finished writing it by the end of this year

- If she’s still alive after all that to work on Reckless 5, it’ll be the last book of the series... probably. She’s also working on a bunch of smaller projects with her artists in residence

- Question: What are Cornelia’s favorite stories by Jane Austen, the Brontë sister and Shakespeare? She’s not a huge fan of Austen or Brontë because she finds all those repressed emotions too exhausting to read about. With Shakespeare on the other hand she struggles to name a favorite because there’s so much greatness to choose from (she does name MacBeth and Romeo and Juliet though)

- The Black Prince’s legacy in the Reckless timeline may play a role in the next Reckless book or it might evolve into a whole other story. Either way, she’s thinking about it  👀

- Someone asks about Reckless characters and Cornelia says that Kami’en and the Dark Fairy felt very familiar to her from the start in that she always knew who they were as people. She’s not sure why that is. She thinks the Dark Fairy represents many aspects of womanhood, like the ancient forgotten Goddess. Same with Fox, who embodies different sides of that.

- If Cornelia had to date a man from the Mirrorworld, Kami’en would interest her

- Rainer Strecker randomly joins the chat to say hi and everyone is delighted

- Cornelia’s favorite book series is still Lord of the Rings

- Question: Why has the Black Prince never found his true love? Cornelia says she’s not sure that’s true - maybe he did found true love at some point and then lost it again? ‘...and they lived happily ever after’ isn’t a guaranteed outcome after all. Since he’s such a passionate man, she’s pretty sure he’s had at least one big lovestory at this point. She hasn’t asked him about that yet but hopes she’ll find out when she continues writing his story.

- Jumping off that question, Cornelia says she respects her characters’ privacy and lets them keep their secrets until the time comes to ask about them, just as she would with real people.

- Someone asks if Cornelia has ever written herself into a story and she says a part of her is in all her characters. Except the villains because she hates them. She feels closest to Fox because she also always wished she could shapeshift

- The bookstore lady jumps in and asks about Meggie, is she similar to how Cornelia was as a child? Cornelia says yes, especially because she also had a very close relationship with her father and they would bond over books. However, she always envisioned Meggie with dark hair and as a different kind of girl than she was. (Ok sidenote from me on that, I wonder what she means by ‘dark hair’? Because Meggie is explicitly blond, so like... dark blond? Or did we just unlock brunette Meggie in 2021? Cornelia-)

- Continuing the conversation, Cornelia says she doesn’t consider herself the creator of any of the characters in her stories, she feels like she met them and wrote about him but she would never say something like ‘I invented Dustfinger’ because that’s absurd. How would that even work. That’s disrespectful. No.

- Some characters pretty much demand to be written about and are very impatient (like Jacob), others are more shy and elusive and take effort to understand (like Will or Dustfinger)

- There probably won’t be another book like The Labyrinth of the Faun because it was created under such unbelievable circumstances. Cornelia does enjoy writing film scripts, though, like she did for the Wild Chicks recently

- Question: How does Cornelia come up with character names? She has a bunch of encyclopedias and when she knows where a story takes place she checks if there are any artists from there whose names she can steal. She always wants names to have meaning and to paint a picture of whatever character it belongs to. However, she says that sometimes the vibe of a name is a tricky thing: When she wrote The Thief Lord (which takes place in Italy), she thought ‘Mosca’ was the perfect name for a big strong boy. However when the time came to translate the story into Italian, the Italians told her that ‘Mosca’ sounds like the name of a tiny little fly. Oh well.

- Cornelia says a lot of readers have written to her about The Thief Lord because at one point Victor (the detective) calls Mosca (who is black) a “Mohrenkopf”. Context: ‘Mohrenkopf’ is a German slur towards black people and also an outdated name for this goddamn marshmallow cookie:

Fuck this cookie.

- Cornelia says yeah, Victor is being racist in that moment but that doesn’t mean that she, the author, is racist. Similarly, she used the term ‘Indians’ in Reckless and a lot of readers were upset which she did not anticipate. To her it’s a positive word since she admires ‘Indians’ so deeply and finds terms like ‘Native/Indigenous Americans’ very complicated. She wonders how much longer she’ll be allowed to say ‘Black Prince’

- She thinks it’s right to be vigilant about bigotry but simply searching for problematic words is dangerous because context matters

- Bookstore lady brings up Pippi Longstocking and how the N-word has been removed from modern copies (think Pippi’s father). She think’s it’s wrong because the original text is part of the cultural heritage and shouldn’t be hidden from children but instead explained. 

- Cornelia says that in America she sees the hurt that’s connected to that word but she doesn’t think it’s right to simply remove the slur and expect everything to be fine. After all, the text in which it was used is still the same so any harmful ideas would still be in there and that needs to be discussed. Simply whitewashing things doesn’t make them any less racist.

- Cornelia brings up a visual example: The Asterix comics. She always liked them but the fact that the only black character is drawn as a racist caricature is harmful and wrong. It’s time to listen when black people express how hurtful depictions like that can be. Many white people never noticed racism growing up because it never affected them and that’s why it’s important to learn

- The ‘from rags to riches’ American dream was usually reserved for white people and Cornelia thinks a lot of (white) people are waking up to that fact. The way black people are still being criminalized and the way prisons use inmates for cheap labor is horrible and like a modern kind of slavery

- The bookstore people try to say something but Cornelia is not done: We Europeans are not off the hook either because the sins and wounds of colonialism are still felt around the world, not to mention the way other countries are still exploited today. Our wealth rests on the shoulders of poorer nations. Many doors are opening and it’s difficult to step through but we have to do it and admit to the things we may have been blind to due to privilege.

- The three of them agree on that and go back to reading questions

- Question: What are Cornelia’s tips for young authors? She advises to never start writing a story on a computer, always get a notebook and collect ideas & pictures for your story. Don’t rush things. If you have more than one story, give each story its own book and feed whichever one is hungry. It’s important to follow the idea where it leads, if you use cliches your readers will recognize them. And then it just takes time and passion. And trust in your own unique voice. She paraphrases a quote by Robert Louis Stevenson who once said no one cares about stories or characters or whatever, people read books to see the world through the goggles the author puts on them. I’m sure he said it prettier, I’m paraphrasing the paraphrase.

- That said, Cornelia thinks authors who say things like “I’m writing to express my innermost turbulences” are kinda dumb. She thinks it’s important to write about the things that happen everywhere else and around yourself and to try to find voices for others, not just yourself. Just like how carpenters build furniture for everyone else, a writer should use words to build things for others, whether it’s a window or door or a hiding place.

- Speaking of notebooks, as most of us probably know Cornelia has a lot of those and occasionally publishes them on her website. She says she’d love to let people look through them in person, maybe at the new farm in Germany (Cornelia sure does love farms)

- Speaking of writing things on paper, all three of them stress that everyone should write more letters because one day they’ll be old letters and curious people will want to read them, just as we like to read old documents now.

- Last question: How come both the Inkworld and the Mirrorworld feature a character called Bastard? Cornelia thinks that’s a good question and she should probably think about that. (Am I stupid? Are they talking about Basta? I’m confused)

...And with that, the livestream ends. They’ll get back together to do this again two months from now, until then: I’m going tf to sleep

#its 4am fuck me this took SO LONG- #cornelia funke #info #reckless #inkheart #man this was a long one #a lot to unpack here #thanks cornelia i have more questions now hdfhkjghd #i googled way more slurs than i had planned for today ngl #i really really hope i managed to accurately translate especially that part of the conversation #honestly i cringed a bit hearing them talk about it #but it is an important discussion i suppose #also @ the people who actually read my tags: #thank you for the good luck wishes for my interview today!! it went really well! #i was vibrating the entire time bc its been so long since i talked to a stranger #but i got the job :) so all is well

[nocturna-iv]

001: descendants, 002: Bumarry, 003: Ben for the ask game please ❤️

Hi luv!

About this ask:

And of course!

001: Descendants

Favorite character: Uma

Least Favorite character: Mal

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon):

Harry Hook x Uma

Ben x Uma

Harriet Hook x Ginny Gothel 

Jay x Lonnie

Jay x Uma

5 Favorite polyships (canon or non-canon):

Ben x Harry Hook x Uma (Ben x Gil x Harry Hook x Uma)

Audrey x Harry Hook x Gil x Uma (Audrey x Ben x Harry Hook x Gil x Uma)

Carlos de Vil x Jay x Lonnie

Chad x Jay x Gil x Harry Hook 

Gil x Harry Hook x Jay x Uma

Character I find most attractive: Harry Hook

Character I would marry: Ben, Harry, Lonnie & Uma

Character I would be best friends with: Ben, Carlos, Jane & Jay

A random thought: Because it’s Disney, Descendants doesn’t touch on prostitution, human trafficking, and violent sexuality and at a very early age that the VK had to live, as happens in the real world in invasions, guerrillas (child soldiers), street children or centers penitentiaries not properly regulated (such as the Isle of the Lost, a prison without guards and any law). But I don’t touch on the subject because it’s something very real and strong to expose it like that with the fandom but due to my profession and work, it’s something that my brain always remembers. Also, I don't like it when people treat these topics just for shock value.

An unpopular opinion: It's visibly awkward that ships and popular characters are mostly white. And I mean in the content of the fandom. Although we talk about the racism that exists in the canon, very few people seek to balance the numbers with new contributions  (whether with content with canon characters, OCs, or y/n). I don't know if it makes sense. But it seems that it is easy to talk about racism but not do something actively to include BIPOC characters (This is why I get excited when I find people drawing Audrey, Jay, Evie, Uma, and others without lightening their skin tone or writing fics with BIPOC y/n or creating things with the BIPOC canon characters as their main characters)

My canon OTP: Harry Hook x Uma

Non-canon OTP: Jay x Lonnie

Most badass character: Uma

Pairing I am not a fan of: Any ship with Mal. Especially Mal canon. And I HATE Mal x Uma, Audrey x Mal and Ben x Mal. Because of the toxic and abusive environment.

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): 

Chad Charming.  From the start, Chad, Cinderella's son was turned into... a terrible character. Well, in the beginning, he is intelligent and manipulative, who knows how to use his charm against others. Brilliant. Cool. I can work with that. He may have an arc about learning about his wrongdoing and using his privileges to help others who don't. But no, the character just went downhill and became everyone's joke. 

Also, Ben, obviously. The movies wouldn't exist without him and he became an accessory to Mal. Disney can only write hero and damsel in distress, it seems. Because they do that to Ben. A tool to move the plot. My poor golden boy.

Favourite friendship: Jay and Lonnie. Give me two best friends who constantly joke around, kick each other's butt, compete in even the most ridiculous things, are affectionate with each other and even if they don't plan on it, they spend time together (I'm seeing you Jay and "I'm not going to invite no one to the ball but I'm going to dance with Lonnie all night ")

Character I want to adopt or be adopted by: I'm going to adopt Celia and no one will be able to stop me!

002: Bumarry,

When of if I started shipping it: Technically I answered this here. Also, from looking for Huma and Buma fics, I ended up finding my first Bumarry and... Oh, I got hooked on the idea.

My thoughts: They are my OTPoly (One True Polyship). I love them. Because they allow me to mix the variables and create new scenarios. After all the damage Ben has gone through, I inevitably want to give him the best and the best is Huma. What else can I say? It’s absolute logic.

What makes me happy about them: The devotion, affection, and strength they would have. Ben and Uma are very different leaders who complement each other very well and I could only trust Harry to take care of the two of them and give them the freedom they deserve. Ben is incredibly loving and that's something both Harry and Uma deserve to feel, Uma is incredibly protective and Ben needs that backing to rule and Harry needs that to stay alive every 5 seconds. Harry's loyalty is unprecedented, he would see to not only that everything is up to Ben and Uma's standards, but he would personally see that their dreams come true.

What makes me sad about them: 

Harry Hook/Uma:

Ben/Harry Hook:

Ben/Uma:

Ben/Harry Hook/Uma:

There isn't much of them... And they're mostly fics of mine. I want more content, you know? I want to read fics, drabbles, see fanarts... Buh.

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: It’s not in Bumarry itself. Actually, it's in Ben/Harry Hook, they usually play dirty with Uma. And it annoys me. They make her mean, jealous, cruel, or things like that to Ben and Harry. And this I came across once: They make Harry gay and that his relationship/dynamic with Uma is pure appearance. I had no problem with Harry being gay, but the justification for his sexual tension with Uma was all... Fake? No, it didn't fit in well with me. I think that's why when you ask me to write Ben/Harry Hook, Uma is there to give support. Don't play dirty with my queen.

Things I look for in fanfic: Uma dom! Uma top! Those are my favorite tags.

My kinks: With this polyship? Okay... BDSM all the way. 

Ben:  Caring dom, cuckolding, cupping, degradee (especially with actions), experimentalists, little one, masochist, pet, hunter (primal), praise kink, prey (primal), rope bunny, submissive, suspension, switch, tentacle fetich, voyeur,  wax play

Harry Hook: Alpha sub, brat, breath play, biting fetich, choking, cupping, dom, degrader, exhibitionist, knife play (hook play?), owner, pet, praise kink, prey (primal), rigger, sadistic, slave, submissive,  switch, tentacle fetich

Uma:  Brat tamer, biting fetich, Dom, electrostimulation (electro-wand, feel like a little sting), exhibitionist, Immobilization, masochist, mistress, owner, hunter (primal),  orgasm control, sensation play, scratching, 

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: Ben/Uma, Ben/Harry Hook, Harry Hook/Uma, with Gil, Evie or Jay. 

My happily ever after for them: 

Ben and Uma reigning Auradon and the Isle of the Lost together, Harry Hook taking care of them so they don't get exhausted and are protected from any attack. 

Ben on the run with Harry and Uma to live a pirate life and reclaiming Auradon in a rebellion.

003 Ben

How I feel about this character: I love him! He has good intentions. Ben knows that he is in a position of power and struggles to take advantage of his privileges to change things. He is rebellious, the second he is going to take the throne he begins to dismantle the system. Ben has a good heart and wants to help other people. Besides, I love that he has his survival instinct broken.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: Uma, Harry Hook, Evie, Gil, Jay, Audrey and Chad

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Jane, Lonnie, Chad, Audrey, Evie, Uma, Harry Hook, Evie, Gil, Jay hahaha

My unpopular opinion about this character: Because he's a guy, the fandom downplays the horrible things he's been through.

One thing I wish would happen/had happened with this character in canon: He has maintained his friendship with Audrey and Chad. It breaks my heart to know that he is completely alone in that department since D1 and is perpetuated throughout the following films. I also wanted him to end up with Mal.

My het ship: Ben/Uma & Audrey/Ben

My fem/slash ship: Ben/Harry Hook, Ben/Gil, Ben/Chad

My OTP: Ben/Uma

My OT3: Ben/Harry Hook/Uma

My cross over ship: *thinking* Oh... Ben/Leo Valdez (PJO) And! And! Ben/Reggie (JATP)

My kink: Caring dom, cuckolding, cupping, degradee (especially with actions), experimentalists, little one, masochist, pet, hunter (primal), praise kink, prey (primal), rope bunny, submissive, suspension, switch, tentacle fetich, voyeur,  wax play

A HC fact: He likes to constantly question himself. About his sexual orientation, about his gender identity, about his ability to love, about his pleasure, above all. He likes to explore. Ben is queer.

My gender bend: Technically I already have it. In Meanwhile. Bee, she loos like her. I LOVE the idea of Bee shieldmaiden.

I love responding this! Thank you!!!!!!!

#ask game #uma descendants #harry hook #ben descendants #ben florian #harry descendants #uma daughter of ursula #descendants #huma descendants #buma descendants #benry descendants #bumarry descendants #audrey descendants #gil descendants #sea three #jay son of jafar #chad descendants #anti mal #anti bal #ben deserves better #huma #buma

[chat-noir-always-here]

Marinette and Anxiety

First, lets count all the things Marinette has that Adrien doesn’t have:

She has a healthy and positive home environment

Both of her parents are living, active presences in her life

Tom and Sabine love Marinette unconditionally

On top of having loving parents she has extended relatives who care deeply for her

she is allowed to go out and have friends over

going to public school is treated as a necessity rather than a privilege

she has, to some degree, or at least more so than Adrien, knowledge of socializing and is able to perceive signals better

she is on good terms and has a history with almost all of her classmates

she is allowed to explore her hobbies

she is allowed to choose her own occupation 

she has the freedom to do whatever she wants with her schedule outside of school and curfew

I could go on but I trust my point is clear? Marinette is blessed with many of the things Adrien has been denied. Worse, everything listed above falls under the category of “normal” “common decency” or “necessity.”

Long post is long and I don’t like cuts because I’ve lost a few posts in the past using them. Please filter the tag “long post” i use it for walls of texts like this one.

But Mari’s life, despite being vastly different and more fulfilling than Adrien’s, isn’t perfect.

In order to understand Mari’s struggles we need to take a look at her history.

We see in Origins that Marinette has been the target of Chloe’s bullying for a long time—three years or perhaps even longer. As is the case with many victims of bullying she lacked the courage and confidence to stand up for himself and more or less suffered in silence until Alya encouraged her to fight back.

Something to understand about bullying: it drastically warps someone’s perspective. Not only in how they view themselves but the people and environment around them. The end result? Some form of isolation and possibly PTSD. Bullying victims tend to be either physically/mentally withdrawn, or both.

Not a lot is known about Mari’s life before the Origins episode, but given that none of her classmates stood up to Chloe except Alya, we can infer that they have grown accustomed to Chloe’s treatment of Mari and are likely not especially close with her at this point in time. 

In her “In defense of Chat Noir” video, Toon Ruins states that Adrien isn’t especially close with his classmates yet either, saying he is “that friend that your mutual friends invite along and is just kinda there.” Its not unreasonable to presume that Mari was in that spot before she became Ladybug, befriended Alya, and developed enough confidence to stand up for herself as well as others.

It would also help explain why her friends were so quick to doubt her when Lila accused her in the Ladybug episode. Despite everything she’s done for them between Origins and Ladybug, they simply haven’t been close for very long and as Alya pointed out the evidence “was stacked against her.” Of course Alya and Adrien believed her because they are closer with Mari than practically any of her other classmates.

Adrien glaring at Lila when Marinette calls out to him for help. I cannot~~~~

Of course there was another, more obvious reason they doubted her: her feelings for Adrien and how intense she is when acting on them, which as Alya puts it served as her supposed “motive” for “hurting Lila.”

Marinette has often been seen crossing lines that are better off left uncrossed when it comes to Adrien. Her friends, especially the girls, are even somewhat aware of how intense these feelings are. (i.e. Alex’s comment during Gigantitan “Marinette knows a lot about Adrien it’s kinda creepy”).

More often than not, Mari wants to go somewhere mainly for the sake of seeing Adrien. Examples of this are when she’s supposed to wait for Nadja to come pick up her cake and during Simon Says when she is grounded for valid reasons . Often times there is some obligation involved—her promise to show up at Alix and Kim’s challenge and her promise with Nino in Simon Says—but chances are if Adrien weren’t there she wouldn’t want to go so bad (until an akuma showed up that is).

Something to understand about this: Mari has little to no opportunity to see Adrien. Worse, her history of being bullied and her previous status as an “acquaintance” rather than a “close friend” gives her at least some modicum of understanding about his situation. She empathizes with Adrien and cares for him, and is aware of his loneliness. During her life before Ladybug she likely longed for someone who would comfort and console her, and yeah probably found some relief with her mom given how Sabine seems aware of Chloe’s treatment of her daughter.

 But Adrien has no one, and knowing that makes Mari all the more anxious when he doesn’t show up for their social gatherings as well as driving her desire to be the source of love and comfort he so desperately needs.

I won’t deny Mari literally breaking the law for Adrien isn’t okay. Sneaking into his home, stealing his phone, and kissing his statue (its a statue in an important museum. Chances are you’re not supposed to touch those, let alone kiss them) are simply NOT OKAY things to do. A lot of this behavior earns her some hate from the fandom and some well-deserved scolding from Tikki. But rather than making me hate her, or call her a stalker, I’m mostly concerned that she doesn’t understand how bad that is. 

But Chat Blanc was a game changer. Adrien would NEVER have seen Ladybug in his room if she hadn’t taken her sweet time inspecting his belongings, smelling his pillow, etc. Meaning Adrien could have had her present and not known about Ladybug (he may have been curious as to how Mari’s gift got past security though). 

However since Marinette WAS seen by Adrien, he was able to learn her secret identity which led to this:

This is a scenario she never expected. And as she learns this was caused by her own poor judgement, she wastes no time in saving Chat Noir, erasing her name from her gift and allowing Adrien to believe it’s a gift from his Brazilian fan club instead of from her, Marinette.

Chat Blanc was one of the last episodes of s3. Safe to say she probably won’t be breaking into anything anytime soon (theres some debate over the chronological order of the episodes, but if I recall this one takes place either in the last four or five episodes on most lists). She nearly lost her kitty for good after all--that’s not a price she’s ever been willing to pay.

This likely wouldn’t have happened at all except Mari’s life as ladybug has caused her to become accustomed to certain behavior in order to keep her secret. Yeah Mari stole Adrien’s phone right out of his locker—and no that wasn’t okay. But remember when she stole her textbook back from Alya? Taking it right out of her bag when Alya wasn’t looking? Just so you know, in the French version, Mari tells Tikki she wrote her name in that textbook. So her secret identity was in grave danger and she had to act quickly.

You’re damn lucky Alya didn’t crack that book open the minute she got it, Mari.

Anyhoo the point is this: Mari is applying what she has come to know as “acceptable behavior i do to protect my secret identity” to her situation with Adrien and misinterpreting it as “acceptable behavior I do to keep Adrien from possibly rejecting me and crushing my soul.” And in her head, they’re similar even though the consequences of either secret coming out are vastly different.

Really think about the context of that voicemail she sent Adrien—if she had accidentally butt dialed Adrien while taking to Tikki about her life as Ladybug and then had to go steal his phone to keep him from learning the truth the fandom wouldn’t have had nearly as much beef with her over that as she wasn’t the one who created the “secret identities rule.”

The reason the two secrets are equally crucial in keeping, in Mari’s mind, is likely due to her overwhelming anxiety. Which even before she became the Guardian of Paris and then the Guardian of Miraculous she was still an anxious person.

She didn’t have much confidence or even a large support network. But in the span of one day she was entrusted with the safety and well being of every single person in Paris.

She didn’t believe she was cut out for being Ladybug but was denied the option of refusing the position and told to just do her best.

She knew going out she would likely screw up the job and given her task failure wasn’t really an option.

Then her worst fears were realized when she failed to capture her first akuma and many citizens were turned into stone statues. The only way to turn them back was to allow Ivan to be akumatized so she could defeat him and take his akuma. The very knowledge of which crippled her and caused her to give up the ladybug earrings.

She tried to go back to her normal life but couldn’t. Ivan was akumatized, Alya’s life was in danger and Chat Noir was struggling to the point he got captured and needed her help. So she took up being Ladybug again in order to help them.

What was she supposed to do? Watch?

From the very beginning she had no say in the matter. Her life as Marinette wasn’t and isnt easy—she has plenty of her own problems but she was given a Miraculous and basically condemned to being at war with Hawk Moth indefinitely.

Ever give a thought as to why the French government allow these two vigilante teenagers to handle the situation? Because ordinary people can’t. In other words if Mari thought only of herself she would give up the fight and ignore all the ensuing damage. But she can’t. And she won’t. She has a job to do. She could give up her miraculous but that would mean taking the pressure off her shoulders and dumping it all onto someone else just as it was dumped onto her. She cant bring herself to do that and even if she could—who would she possibly give it to?

Just imagining that kind of pressure makes me want hurl from nerves. And as of the S3 finale its gotten worse as she has lost Fu, the person who could give out Miraculouses to other people in case she never comes back one day.

Hawk Moth would win. Game over. That’s what it would mean.

Ladybug and Chat Noir know what Hawk Moth winning would mean better than anyone else does. Of course they won’t walk away from this fight. But that means they have to juggle their double lives until its over, and apparently have to do it again with a second hawk moth later on in the future.

And again, even before all of this Mari had a lot she suffered from. Chloe bullying her, feeling lonely, being clumsy. Clumsiness is mortifying--it truly means suffering. Being the class clutz is like being the class laughingstock. Mari seems to handle it fairly well.

 Until she’s around Adrien. I mean look at her!

Poor girl can’t stand looking so uncool in front of her crush. Even though he seems to find her clumsiness endearing.

Going off what was said in my “Debunking: Adrien is perfect” post, Marinette is hyper-sensitive to Adrien’s situation despite not really knowing the full extent of his suffering. 

Marinette doesn’t know Gabriel is Hawk Moth either, but she does understand Adrien is lonely, isolated and in need of a source of love and comfort. She also understands to some degree that his heart is delicate, so she constantly handles him with kid gloves and looks on him with a perfection filter. We see how Mari reacts to upsetting Adrien in Malediktator when she softly whispers an apology after Adrien expresses his sorrow over everyone celebrating Chloe’s departure. She seems pained and distraught over causing him to be upset. Thus the reason Marinette calls Adrien perfect isn’t that she never sees any of his flaws--she just cannot acknowledge or process them under these conditions. She’s too busy trying not to hurt him. 

Marinette can comprehend Adrien’s situation, couples that with her own past experiences of bullying/ loneliness/ being a clumsy laughingstock. That combined with her love for him and her anxiety-warped common sense, led to the behavior which has earned her some disapproval from the fandom at large.

 But really? Marinette’s not a terrible person. Anymore than Adrien is.

 Adrien’s sometimes-obnoxious-flirting is brought on by his desire to “not look lame” in front of Ladybug. Ergo, his own insecurities are amplified around her because he too lacks confidence.

 Likewise Marinette’s stammering and clumsiness are amplified around Adrien, as is her anxiety and her desire to be cool in front of him.

 They both feel they have to prove themselves to the other in some regard. And they both have past and present experiences that have left them hurting and/or warped their judgement in some ways. 

 This doesn’t make Mari’s irrational behavior any more acceptable than Adrien’s troubles make his leading Kagami on and lying to Ladybug acceptable. It’s not acceptable. But Mari is no more deserving of hate than Adrien is.

They’re just a couple of stressed out kids, folks

#long post #marinette dupain cheng #Marinette #adrien agreste #adrien #miraculous ladybug

[mdelpin]

Male Order Bride - Chapter 2

AO3 | Prev: Ch 1 | Ch 2 | Next: Ch 3

Chapter 2

Gray examined the crowd of people, attempting to figure out what they were doing there. There were a lot of young couples in attendance, which seemed strange for an old building away from the town center. Several recognized him and offered a friendly wave.

It appeared Lyon hadn’t caught the guy yet, as he observed some of his father’s hirdmen walking around the room and studying the faces of those assembled. Gray was further impressed by the fire mage, although considering his outlandish appearance, it probably wouldn’t be long before they found him. He kept an eye out, hoping to catch sight of him again.

Gray continued to explore the large room, careful to avoid any attempts at conversation. He noticed a platform at the back decorated in silver and blue, the colors of Isvan, while a colorful sign welcomed everyone to the Isvan Employment Auction.

Employment Auction? He’d never heard of that before.

“What are you doing here? I thought I heard Erza say you went home.”

Gray recognized Lyon’s voice behind him and turned to smirk at his friend. “Never thought I’d see the day someone else would put you in your place.”

“It’s just a matter of time. He’s in here somewhere.”

Lyon didn’t seem concerned in the slightest, instead looking around the room with an odd smile. “This place takes me back.”

“Huh? Back to what?”

“Don’t you remember? This is where your Dad found Ur and hired her to take care of your sorry ass.”

“Here?”

“Oh, that’s right. I forgot we met later.” Lyon pointed to the platform, “Right up there. The organizers had demanded I wait in some back room, but Ur wouldn’t have it. Your dad came to see what the commotion was. That’s how they met.”

“What is this place?”

“Well, most of the time it serves as a storage building for merchant cargo, with the occasional dock worker meeting thrown in. But twice a year it hosts this employment thing for women. They can get hired as governesses, teachers, housekeepers, nannies, you name it. Ur had heard about it when we were in Brago. It’s what brought us here, actually. She’d wanted us to start a new life. You know, after everything.”

Back then, Gray hadn’t cared about where Ur and Lyon had come from, but he struggled to accept that Ur’s introduction into his life had stemmed from anywhere so ordinary.

He’d resented her at first, convinced she was trying to replace his mother. But once her magic lessons began, he’d cast all those feelings aside. Ur was strong. Stronger than any other ice mage he’d ever met. He’d figured if he worked hard and learned everything he could from her, he’d soon be able to avenge his mother and grandfather, and the countless others who had died at the hands of that foul demon. Lyon had been the perfect training partner, equally determined to push through all their limits.

Why had he never thought to ask him why? He’d always known Ur wasn’t Lyon’s mother, but it startled him to realize that even after all these years, he had no clue how they’d ended up together. Lyon was the closest thing he’d ever had to a brother, and it disheartened him to realize how little he truly knew about him.

He opened his mouth to say something, but never got the chance as a man he recognized as Invel Yura, one of his father’s advisors, stepped onto the platform and commanded everyone’s attention.

“Ladies and Gentlemen, I am pleased to welcome you to this year’s Winter Employment Auction.”

The participants crowded around the platform eagerly, applauding the announcement.

“As many of you might know, our late Chief, Sterling Fullbuster, founded the Employment Auction over twenty-five years ago.” Invel peered at the audience, smiling when he recognized Gray.

“An ardent supporter of women’s rights, Chief Sterling sought to create a safe environment for women to find employment in our great town. Over the years, we have helped place hundreds of women, and as word of our experiment has reached other towns, we have seen increased participation. We are proud to continue this tradition, and we hope that our future Chief, who is with us today, will see fit to continue it for many years to come.”

Gray groaned internally, even as he smiled and waved at those who acknowledged him, realizing he now had no choice but to stay until the conclusion of the event. He attempted but failed to ignore Lyon’s laughter at his predicament. With a parting clap on the shoulder, Lyon informed him he was returning to his search, promising to check in with him later.

He listened as Invel followed his introduction with an explanation of how the auction worked. It seemed to be divided into three phases. In the first phase, employers received a clipboard with several bid forms and were allotted two hours to interview candidates. Each candidate wore a pin on her right shoulder that showed her identification number.

Once time was up, the second phase began. Employers submitted their bids at the platform, placing them into envelopes marked with the candidate’s identification number. Each bid needed to describe the job duties and pay offered clearly.

During the third phase, all candidates would receive their envelopes. They would then evaluate the enclosed offers and pick out the job situation that most appealed to them. Should any issues arise, Invel would mediate them. Seemed simple enough.

With the explanation now at an end, Invel announced the candidates’ entrance and ceded the platform.

Gray was curious to see how many women were taking part, considering the number of people present, but Invel’s approach blocked his view.

Invel bowed his head briefly, and then immediately launched into a scolding. “This is most unusual, Master Gray. All prospective employers must pass a thorough investigation before being allowed to take part. It is one of the safety measures we’ve set in place. Given your position, however, I will allow it this one time. In the future, see that you submit a request in advance.”

Invel thought he was here to hire someone? For what, court jester? Lyon already filled that role nicely. Still, it was easier to play along than attempt to explain how he’d gotten there.

“I apologize, I wasn’t thinking. Thank you for your understanding.”

He accepted the clipboard Invel offered him with a polite smile.

“Of course,” Invel said, “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I see someone trying to get my attention. Good luck.”

Gray killed time by walking around the room and trying to blend in, half-listening to conversations around him while keeping an eye out for his mystery man. He still found it hard to believe Ur had been a part of one of these. None of the participants seemed remotely like her. His eyes nearly popped out of their sockets when he recognized one candidate.

Shit! What in Hel’s name was Lucy Heartfilia doing here? She’d been the last girl he’d sent home before Juvia. Was she here because of that? Should he go talk to her?

Just as he was deciding it would be best for him to avoid her, another girl joined her. One that immediately drew his interest. Her steps were awkward, and she seemed ill at ease in the formal clothes. Her walk reminded him of a young Erza proudly showing off her first pair of heels, even though she could barely walk in them.

Her pink hair came down to her shoulders in loose waves, while the blue gown she wore contrasted nicely against her tanned skin. At first glance, Gray merely thought her a beautiful girl, until he got a good glimpse at her face.

His eyes widened as he recognized the features. He forgot all about avoiding Lucy, compelled by the need to know if he was right.

“Hi Lucy.”

“Gray.”

Her tone was not welcoming in the slightest, but he ignored it, smiling at her as if they were old friends. His gaze soon shifted to her companion, hoping to force her to speak. If he was right about who she was, she’d try to avoid it.

“Hello, I’m Gray Fullbuster, a pleasure to make your acquaintance.” Gray offered his hand in greeting. The girl had been about to shake it when Lucy noticed.

“Natsu!”

The girl’s hand stopped in midair, and she peered at Lucy in confusion. Gray smirked, that was one point for him.

“Natsu, that’s a lovely name, and something we could certainly use a lot more of in Isvan.”

She tilted her head, frowning cutely at him.

“It means summer, doesn’t it?”

“Oh yes, it does,” Natsu replied in a silken voice, which was not at all what Gray had been expecting. Could he be wrong? Was she just a small-town girl who’d come to Isvan in search of a job and was understandably nervous?

“What sorts of jobs are you interested in?”

“We’re looking to be nannies, or governesses. Something I know you’re not in any need of, so if you’ll just excuse us,” Lucy grabbed Natsu’s hand and yanked her away towards a young couple.

Natsu tried to keep up, but ended up losing her balance. Gray was quick to catch her, and as he did, he felt her magic flare, materializing into a thin layer of flames that traveled across her arms.

“Let go of me!”

She struggled in his arms; the flames spreading as she did so, skirting ever closer to the fabric of her dress. Gray’s eyes darted up to follow their path, noting absently that her pin had the number seven emblazoned on it. “I don’t want to hur-.”

“Steady there,” Gray interrupted, smiling down at her as he called on his magic, coating her arms in an icy mist that quickly put out the flames before they could blaze out of control.

Natsu’s jaw dropped as Gray dispelled his flames, “How did you do that?”

Gray wasn’t able to respond right away, for after the initial satisfaction at having succeeded, he’d peered into Natsu’s eyes and now found himself utterly lost in them. He’d never seen any more beautiful. Bursts of green converged on a gold-rimmed pupil, reminding him of the early morning nature walks he’d once taken with his mother in the summers. And when those eyes met his, Gray couldn’t help but recognize the fear and desperation that lurked in their depths.

Pink hair, tanned skin, fire magic, fear - not to mention the awkward way she carried herself. Everything pointed to this being the guy Lyon was after but made up to look and sound like a strikingly beautiful woman. Hell, he’d done such a good job it would even convince Silver.

Natsu must have gotten help from someone here. No, not someone. Gray knew exactly who.

Lucy Heartfilia.

What was her magic? He wracked his brain but couldn’t remember, and that more than anything forced him to acknowledge he'd barely paid any attention to her during their meeting, or to any of the others. But none of that mattered right now because he had a choice to make.

“I just used my magic to push yours back,” Gray finally replied, struggling to keep his voice level so as not to give away that he knew Natsu’s identity.

Natsu gazed at him, his mouth suddenly breaking into a lopsided grin that elicited a strange fluttering in Gray’s chest and complicated his thoughts further.

“Let’s gooo, Natsu,” Lucy urged, and while Natsu had seemed ready to protest, she spun around and followed.

Gray turned to see what had spooked her and spotted Lyon walking swiftly towards them. He could tell from his friend’s expression that he’d already reached the same conclusion.

What should he do, which side should he take?

Gray was the future Chief of Isvan. He knew well that his thoughts should be on the danger this man could pose to his people. But that brief interaction had shown him his instincts had been correct. Natsu didn’t appear to have control over his magic, and Gray had sensed no malice coming from him. In fact, it had been just the opposite. He'd acted terrified when his magic had flared. It just didn’t add up.

Still, Lyon was his best friend, his foster brother, and he didn’t want to get him in trouble either.

Then Gray thought about how his heart had felt at the sight of that grin and how he’d considered Natsu’s appearance could fool even Silver, and a plan formed in his mind.

Confident that Natsu didn’t pose a danger to Isvan, Gray considered pursuing a different choice. One that could both help him and protect Natsu from the hird until he could learn control of his magic.

The more he thought about it, the more convinced Gray became it was the only way to get out of this wedding mess. If he could persuade Natsu to pretend to be his fiancee, he wouldn’t have to marry Juvia and it would give him time to see if something could blossom between them.

He grabbed Lyon by the arm, ignoring his protests as he searched for a place where they could speak privately.

“We need to talk.”

0-0

Gray found a small office near the building’s entrance and shoved Lyon inside. He closed the door behind them and launched into a swift explanation of his plan, but Lyon wouldn’t even let him finish.

“Absolutely not!”

“You’re being unreasonable. Erza said no one was hurt in any of the fires. You must have felt his magic signature. If that were his intent, why only target abandoned buildings?”

“To gauge our response for when he launches his actual attack.”

Gray groaned as he recognized Lyon’s stubborn streak kicking in. He didn’t have time to argue. For his plan to work, he’d need to put a bid in soon.

“What did you expect me to say?” Lyon crossed his arms over his chest. “You don’t know the first thing about this guy, and what little you know points to him being a criminal.”

“He’s terrified. I could see it in his eyes when he lost control a few moments ago. You didn’t see his face when I pushed his fire back. He was relieved.”

“He lost control here?! That’s even more reason to keep him away from our house. He could hurt everyone we care about.”

Lyon had that I know better than you expression on his face that Gray hated with every fiber of his being.

“While surrounded by ice mages?” he snapped, struggling to keep his temper in check despite Lyon’s attitude. He’d known this wouldn’t be easy, but he’d hoped Lyon would be more willing to see his side. Screw it, if logic wouldn’t work then he’d go for pity. It’s not like he wasn’t desperate.

“When I talked with him earlier, I felt something.”

“You just met him, Gray.”

“I know that, but feeling something is already more than the nothing I feel for Juvia. And if I don’t find someone soon, I’ll have no choice but to marry her on my birthday. Fader said so after you left.”

“He said that?”

Lyon looked away, the first outward sign that he was weakening.

“Time’s up, please enter your bids now,” Invel’s voice echoed through the building’s speaker lacrima, injecting an air of urgency to their conversation.

Lyon had shifted his gaze back to him, his eyes boring into him for what seemed like a lifetime. Gray held his breath, worried the slightest gesture from him might work against him.

“I won’t pretend to understand the attraction you feel toward guys, but I can’t imagine how I’d feel if Ur forced me into a marriage.” He remained silent for a few more moments before announcing, “I’m so going to regret this.”

It took Gray a full minute for the meaning to seep into his brain, but once it did, he beamed with excitement. “I knew I could count on you!”

Lyon grinned, “You mean you knew you could con me.”

Gray didn’t have time to refute the charge as Lyon swiftly turned serious, “Just promise me you’ll be careful,”

“I will.”

And he meant it. He understood the trust Lyon was placing in him, and he would do his best to be worthy of it.

“I gotta go put in my bid,” Gray reached for the doorknob, but Lyon grabbed his arm.

“Hold on there, Romeo. You’re going to have to hire someone for real.”

“What? Why?”

“Invel saw you, dumbass. I’m sure he’ll mention it to Silver. If you only show up with your dream girl, Silver will know something’s up.”

“Oh.”

Gray hadn’t considered that, but had to admit it made sense. Who could he hire and for what? The only other person he’d talked to was Lucy, and he was pretty sure she hated his guts.

But if she’d helped Natsu, he should probably monitor her too, just in case he was wrong about all this.

“Oh, and Gray?” Lyon said as Gray opened the door.

Gray turned his head impatiently, waiting to hear what Lyon had to say, even though he was pretty sure he already knew.

“If he refuses your offer, I will arrest him.”

Gray scowled at the words but nodded his understanding. He’d just have to make sure that didn’t happen.

As Lyon issued new orders to his men through his communication lacrima, Gray offered a silent prayer to his favorite deity.

He had a feeling Loki would understand where he was coming from..

0-0

“I can’t wait to see how many bids I got!” Lucy said as they stood with the other candidates, waiting for the organizer to arrive with their envelopes.

“I just want to get out of here.”

The last two hours had been incredibly stressful for Natsu. He’d felt ill at ease with all the stares and attempts at conversation, not to mention the uncomfortable clothes Lucy had forced him to wear. It had taken all of his self-control not to run out of there. When that light blue-haired hirdman had walked towards them, he’d thought he’d get arrested for sure.

The organizer finally got to them, checking the numbers on their pins against the large envelopes he was carrying and handing them each one. They both thanked him.

“I bet you I got a bunch,” Lucy said while opening her envelope, “I was killing it out there!”

Natsu held on to his envelope but didn’t bother opening it, assuming it was empty. Instead, he watched the expressions of the other women with interest. There were a lot of happy tears, and it made him feel good that things had gone well for them.

“One?! I got one stinking offer? Don’t these people know who I am?”

Natsu turned his attention back to Lucy, alarmed by the loudness of her voice. “Hey Lucy, can you keep it down? We’re trying to avoid attention, remember?”

“Right,” Lucy said, her voice coming back down to normal levels. “I’m sorry, it’s just when I stuck around here for this I thought I’d have lots of choices, you know?”

“Well, but one is better than none, right?”

“I suppose.”

“What’s it for, anyway? Is it from that guy that kept staring at your boobs?” Natsu nudged her with his shoulder, trying to get her out of her foul mood.

“Ew, I hope not,” Lucy giggled, “You’re right though, I bet it’s gonna be something great, and at least I won’t have to go back home.”

He should have realized her sudden silence wasn’t a good sign, but he was too busy thinking about how he couldn’t wait to get back into his clothes to notice. His thoughts wandered back to that ice mage, wishing he’d been able to talk to him longer and ask him for help with his problem. He’d seemed like an okay guy.

“That sonofabitch! Does he think he’s funny? Is that it? Is he trying to ruin my life?”

Lucy continued to rant, getting progressively louder. All the other candidates had moved away from them and the man who had handed them their envelopes was making his way towards them, his features set in a scowl. Natsu wanted nothing more than to leave his friend there and make a run for it, ridiculous shoes and all. He could feel his magic surging and his panic mounted.

“Shh, Lucy, please!”

Natsu closed his eyes, resigned to his imminent arrest, this time for disturbing the peace.

“Invel, you may return to your duties, I’ll handle this.”

“Of course, Master Gray, I’ll leave it in your capable hands.”

“You!”

The venom in Lucy’s voice surprised Natsu but not as much as recognizing the other voice. It belonged to the guy who had caught him earlier, who, now that he thought about it, had acted as if he knew Lucy. His pulse sped up as he realized there was still a chance to ask him for help.

“So, you finally found someone who wasn’t quite so... what was it you said? Oh yes, perky,” Lucy seethed, “and now you want me to be your nanny? Do you even know what your little stunt cost me?”

“Look, I’m sorry about the whole turning you down thing,” Gray said, “It was nothing personal, okay? I’m sure you’re perfect.”

“Damn right I am!”

Natsu looked from one to the other, completely lost to what was going on.

“Could you keep your voice down?” Gray hissed, “I just want a minute to plead my case before you decide.”

“She only got the one offer,” Natsu revealed without thinking.

“Seriously?” Gray laughed, “Must be her charming personality.”

Natsu wanted to laugh at the retort, but he knew better than to provoke Lucy when she was seriously pissed. “Dude, you are so not helping your case.”

He frowned, hating how strange his voice sounded.

“Oh, right.” Gray ran his fingers through his hair, and flashed a sheepish grin that, while oddly distracting to Natsu, did nothing to placate Lucy.

“Well, you can take your job offer and shove it where the sun doesn't shine.”

Gray’s shoulders slumped at her words, “I already said I was sorry, didn’t I? Besides, I only wrote nanny cause it was something you were considering. You can do whatever you want. If you’d bothered to look at the actual offer, you’d see the pay is more than fair.”

Lucy examined the paper, her eyes widening as she read the offer over, finally looking up at Gray with a guarded expression. “I don’t understand.”

“I’ll be happy to explain, but not here. I’ll need both of you for what I have in mind. Well, to be honest, it’s up to Natsu. If she doesn’t agree, then the offer is off,” Gray said, turning to Natsu.

“You want my help?”

“Yeah, didn’t you see my offer?”

“There’s something in here?” Natsu opened his envelope, saw there were several pieces of paper inside, and snapped it shut quickly.

“Well? Let’s see it,” Lucy gave him a curious glance, “What did he put down on yours?”

“Um, it doesn’t matter. He can just tell me.”

“Honestly, I’d rather you read it, it’s kind of embarrassing.”

“It, uh, doesn’t matter what it is,” Natsu said, hiding the envelope behind his back, “I’m happy to do it as long you promise to help me with my magic.”

“Yeah, sure, I can do that.”

Gray looked relieved and Natsu wondered what he’d just gotten himself into, but it didn’t really matter. Lucy had saved him from the hirdmen, and it seemed as if she wouldn’t have a job if he didn’t accept. Plus, he wasn’t afraid of hard work, and getting help in controlling his increasingly erratic magic would make it worth his while.

“Alright, then you have yourself a deal,” Natsu offered his hand to seal the deal, not knowing how to respond when Gray pulled it up to his mouth for a kiss instead of shaking it.

It was then he understood two things. First, why Lucy had yelled at him earlier. It hadn’t occurred to him that girls rarely shook hands. Second, and by far the most important, Gray thought he was a girl.

He was about to clear that up when a more pressing issue presented itself. The hirdman who’d been chasing him earlier walked up to them, and although Natsu desperately wanted to run away, he knew he couldn’t do that without giving himself away. He only hoped that the guy would leave quickly and not look at him too closely.

“Everything okay over here, Gray?”

“Everything’s fine!” Gray smiled, “I’d like you to meet Natsu. And you remember Lucy?”

“Yes, of course, lovely to see you again, Lucy,” The hirdman bowed slightly to both of them, gazing at Natsu with open curiosity.

“Natsu love, I’d like you to meet Lyon, my foster brother.”

That guy was Gray’s foster brother?!

That complicated everything! How could he tell Gray the truth about who he was now?

He couldn’t and he didn’t like what that implied. The more agitated he became, the more his magic roared, itching to get out. Natsu had almost given up on containing it when Gray placed his hand on the small of his back, reining in the fire that churned inside him with one simple gesture.

Natsu didn't understand the how or why of it, but it made him realize that the safest place for him right now was by Gray’s side, at least until he could regain control of his magic. So he met Lyon’s gaze and flashed him his most disarming smile.

“It’s so nice to meet you.”

#fairy tail #gratsu #update #fic #gray x natsu #male order bride #mob #ch 2

[ncisladaily]

Renée Felice Smith was only six years old when she knew that she wanted to be an actress and storyteller, but people tried to dissuade her from her chosen career path, telling her it was an impossible goal. Luckily, Smith’s parents weren’t among the naysayers, and today she’s living her dream, starring as Intelligence Analyst Nell Jones on NCIS: Los Angeles (Sundays, 9 p.m., CBS) and co-authoring her first children’s book Hugo and the Impossible Thing with her creative partner Chris Gabriel.

So, when her French Bulldog Hugo was diagnosed with a brain tumor, Smith once again ignored the doubters and found the best vet possible to give Hugo a shot at life rather than listen to those who told her it was “just truly impossible.”

“We just knew we had to try for our little guy, and we’re so glad we did because he was with us for another two beautiful years, just grinning, growling and running around the yard like the wild man that he always was,” Smith tells Parade.com in this exclusive interview. “So, we’re so glad we fought for him and advocated for him.”

When Hugo finally passed, Smith and Gabriel knew they had to tell his story to inspire others to conquer the seemingly impossible things in their life. So they wrote a story about a little dog named Hugo, who succeeded where others didn’t even try as a result of his bravery, curiosity, teamwork and persistence.

“The love is still here, and it needed someplace to go, so now we have the book and Hugo’s message that now we get to share with the world, which I’m just so grateful that it’s become real,” Smith adds.

Related: NCIS: Los Angeles‘ Daniela Ruah Speculates About Whether Kensi and Deeks Will Survive the Obstacles Ahead

This Sunday night, Smith will be back with some teamwork of her own when NCIS: Los Angeles returns with a new episode dealing with technology, which is something that Nell excels at. In the “Imposter Syndrome” episode, NCIS obtains a hard drive containing a realistic deep fake video of a deceased terrorist and must retrieve the dangerous technology behind it. However, when the team’s comms are hijacked during their mission, they find that one of their own has been a victim of its potential.

And, spoiler alert, Smith says that in the May 23 Season 12 finale, Nell will finally be reunited with Hetty (Linda Hunt)! But how that will play out remains to be seen.

“Linda was essentially sidelined by the pandemic, but, very exciting, I do share a scene with her in our season finale and it’s one of the most memorable scenes of my time on NCIS: LA, so I’m very grateful to have her back as my scene partner,” Smith says.

For more of what Smith had to say about her real-life Hugo and Hugo and the Impossible Thing, as well as more NCIS: Los Angeles scoop, read on.

With your background, a movie seems a more natural project than a book about Hugo. How did it turn into a book?

Chris, my other half, and I are lovers of all types of books. We grew up with children’s books and some of the most impactful stories and lessons we feel that we’ve learned in our lives we learned in the pages of those books, so we really wanted to create this modern classic, a book that kids, or quite frankly, anyone nowadays could really benefit from.

Especially right now, we’re all dealing with our own version of the impossible thing, and we’re trying to find our way to the other side. What better way to inspire you and yours to go out and conquer whatever your impossible thing is than through a storybook following this spirited French Bulldog through the forest, kind of this yellow brick road, Wizard of Oz structure? He meets up with his forest friends and they end up helping him through the impossible thing. It’s really a story about bravery, curiosity, teamwork and persistence. We wanted to encourage that in our readers, both young and young at heart.

Tell us about Hugo and his battle with his brain tumor.

Hugo was diagnosed with a brain tumor and we were truly beside ourselves. It was an out-of-body experience. He was a feisty, curious, wild man who was quite literally sidelined by this potentially terminal disease, and we just knew that we didn’t want to give up on him, and he wasn’t giving up on himself. Every step of the way, we would say out loud, “Hugo, just let us know, buddy, do you want to keep going?” And he met us with this enthusiasm for the process every step of the way. And that is truly why we kept going.

Did Hugo instill in you the belief that the impossible might be possible? Or did you already have that?

That’s interesting. I think the process really showed us that if you ask the questions, oftentimes the people who ask the questions are the people who find the answers, and this process really reiterated that. He inspired us to advocate for him, because animals are helpless on their own, but we could do something about it. We could ask the questions; we could be his voice. I’m just so thankful that he was always this bright light that had this insatiable curiosity for life. He definitely imbued that in me, and I know he imbued that in Chris. He did inspire us to help him conquer his impossible thing. If he didn’t have the fight in him, if he wasn’t such a spirited dog, I don’t know if that would’ve happened, but he was singular in a way. I reference him as my canine son, because he was. He was my baby.

On NCIS: Los Angeles, Nell is torn these days. She feels Hetty tricked her into taking the job when she said she didn’t want it, but she has the support of her team and also Kilbride. So how do you think she’s feeling these days?

She really is at a crossroads in her life. I think a lot of young women find themselves at this point, where they are very good at their job, but is it the job that they always saw themselves in? Is it the job they saw their future selves thriving in? I think for Nell, she’s really questioning whether she wants this to be her story, and in the process, she’s really finding her voice this season. There’s a scene with Sam Hanna, LL Cool J‘s character, that recently aired, where she spells out her frustrations in her position as de facto operations manager and how she’s struggling to keep the plates spinning. And she tells him that he needs to get on her team. It was a really stern moment for Nell.

I don’t think we’ve really ever seen that. Actually, LL Cool J and I were talking about what a different flavor this scene is bringing to the show because Nell usually is quick with a quip, but she doesn’t often drop the hammer in this way. And this season, we really do get to see Nell drop this hammer, stand in her power, and let people know that she needs help and she’s questioning this process.

I think that’s the side of being the operations manager that we didn’t really get to see very much with Hetty because she had everything under control. So, it’s kind of fun and new to see the person, who may be greener in the position, find her way in this new position of leadership.

How much has COVID affected what we’re seeing this season? Is that why we don’t see more of Linda Hunt, to keep her safe? And I noticed there are fewer people in scenes, especially in ops.

You’re absolutely right. Our show did an incredible job managing the crisis that was the pandemic and continues to be the pandemic. We are tested five days a week. Our crew was incredible in keeping everyone safe. The was goal to keep everyone safe, and we were, in turn, able to create 18 episodes of television, which is incredible.

You were just picked up for your 13th season, so it isn’t over yet, but when you look back, what will you take away from it?

Oh, my goodness. We’re a family, you know, but it’s been a mini-film school for me as well. My time at NCIS: LA has been educational. I just pinch myself how lucky I am that I was able to quite frankly lock onto a job like this for so long. In our industry, stability as an actor is not something you often experience. So, to have this group of people who I’ve grown to love and really consider extensions of my family, I’m just so grateful for the time. I feel like I’ve been a student. I feel like I went to school all over again for 10 years.

With Linda being this master in her craft, I can’t even quantify what I learned from her and most of it happens when we’re waiting to do our scene. It’s in those moments that I hear the stories from her childhood and the stories from early in her career, just these nuggets of wisdom that I have now in my little carpet bag.

From your work outside NCIS: LA, it seems as if maybe long-term, you’re more interested in being behind the camera and writing, producing, directing.

It’s interesting, often as actors, we’re part of someone else’s story, we’re carrying out someone else’s vision, but I’ve always been a storyteller. As a kid, I would essentially write my own little plays and perform them in the yard and direct my friends and family, my sister, namely, in those plays. And for as long as I remember, I’ve always wanted to tell stories. So, yeah, that is where I see myself heading in the future.

You’ve said that you knew at age six that this is what you want to do. And you were lucky that your parents supported you.

Oh, 100 percent. I wouldn’t be standing here today if they hadn’t instilled confidence in me and in my creativity. They really created an environment that fostered out-of-the-box thinking, and I’m so grateful for that.

Which takes us full circle back to the impossible just might be possible.

It’s so true. If you’re curious enough and brave enough and you have the support, obviously, of your community, I think that’s the missing piece in a lot of these puzzles. It’s really the support because you can’t get there alone. No one can. The one-woman show does not exist. It’s an ensemble; it’s a production.

#s12 #Renee Felice Smith #Linda Hunt #ncis la #ncisla #NCIS Los Angeles