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sunandmhoon · 5 months

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Love Songs

Genre: fluff Pairing: Jeonghan X Reader “He thought about your mind, how crazy it must be, how tiring it must be. Who’s on your mind right now? Who has your time? Who have you been seeing? Why couldn’t you just be his?” w/c: 1926 a/n: Hello~~ new story hehe!! Also it’s fluff this time wooohooo. Also idk if you’ve noticed but every svt story so far has been based off a song…hmmm i wonder why that is?? (also I didn't proofread this so I'm sorry for any inconsistencies) ps: pics are from pintrest ctto :) MASTERLIST; OTHER WORKS Jeonghan was never a person that falls in love easily.

It’s not that he’s anti-romantic, or that he hates the concept of giving love or receiving love. In fact, on some days when the rain gets too loud, the room gets too cold and the sky gets too grey, he longs for a nice warm hug from a person that he loves.

He’s had girlfriends before, but they always end in the same way. The same, ‘it’s not you, it’s me” argument. And it is true, he can never find himself infatuated with a person for more than a month. He still finds them attractive of course but he’s never been interested in them, their goals, their big dreams or even their small ones.

That was until he met you.

Meeting you was like an angel appeared at his door; like a gift from cupid to cure his lonely heart. A gift in the form of a new roommate.

Seungkwan was staying in the flat with him before he moved out to his hometown, leaving behind his room and another part of the rent he had to pay. In his absence though, Seungkwan–ever the social butterfly– recommended the place to you, and although Jeonhan was wary at first, he definitely had to thank Seungkwan now.

When he first met you he felt as though his house was graced by a higher being. The sun flooded into the room in golden rays, shining around you, creating a halo above your head. And though he was the known heartbreaker around town, he felt his palms go sweaty and his ears turn hot. And when you spoke, he felt he got worse. Your voice sounded just like it was dipped in honey; smooth and sweet. He could listen to it forever. Your expressions were kind and gentle, you were the type of person that could lure anyone into your charm like a siren in the sea.

He was attracted to you, so so attracted to you, but he brushed it off. It was probably just that, Attraction, nothing more.

As the days went by you two grew closer. First it was catching each other in the kitchen at 3am for a midnight snack. From then on you started talking to each other more. You find out that he’s been living in the flat for five years, he finds out that you just moved to the city. He’s taken you around the area to get you familiar with your surroundings, you’ve cooked him dinner in exchange (and because he only eats ramen in the house). He’s introduced you to his friends, you’ve introduced him to your family.

You even go to him when you need to rant. School’s being annoying? Go to Jeonghan, Your parents are being annoying? Go to Jeonghan, the neighbour that for some reason finds the need to be up at 4am every single morning watching their soap opera at full volume with their door open is being annoying? Go to Jeonghan. Just like the new flat’s been your physical home, Jeonghan has been your emotional home.

You tell him everything, and even though he loves it, he loves that he could be a person you can come to–can talk to and rant to about your hardships, feelings, accomplishments, he somehow hates it when you come to him for advice on love.

“How do I get a boyfriend, Han?”, “Why don’t guys like me?” to “Han, I’ve been talking to this guy”, “what do you think of him?” to the dreaded, “He asked me out on a date!”, “How do I look?” he’s been there through it all. And he won't admit it–he can’t admit that he likes you, he can’t admit that he hates when you tell him not to wait up for you because you’ll be at Woozi’s for the night. He can’t admit that it bothers him that you come home, greet him and go to your room. He can’t admit that he’s lonely again, and that he misses when you would talk to him late at night about your dreams, inspirations, aspirations, goals or even just your shopping list.

And most of all, he hates that you have him listening to love songs. He never used to listen to love songs on purpose, let alone with someone in mind. Love songs have plagued his playlists, and he dreads the day that spotify wraps up his year into one big lovefest. You were sea, sunshine, star and moon; you were his cocoa butter kisses; you were what comes up in his mind when he listens to Daniel Caesar, Frank Ocean and even Drake. You were his in his mind, his playlist, his heart but not his in real life.

He started doing his work in the living room just to see your face, to see you in the kitchen, on the couch or even leaving for school or work or to your boyfriend’s house, because the longer you were with Woozi, the shorter you were in the house.

That was until one day when he came home from work. The world seemed to mirror the same sad mood he’s been in for the past month; heavy rain, grey skies, cold air. It was the kind of weather that made him feel even more lonelier than he already was. He was just about to pass the living room to go to his room when he noticed you asleep on the sofa.

You looked so peaceful that he didn’t want to move, afraid that even the smallest step could wake you up from your slumber. He stood there for what felt like hours but were only a couple of seconds when he was suddenly snapped back to reality with a cold rush of air down his spine. The room was getting colder, he noticed, and he saw you rustling around the couch–no doubt affected by the coolness too.

He saw that your shoulder was exposed to the cool air and quickly but quietly rushed to get a blanket. He placed the blanket over your body, gently tucking the ends to your sides, effectively blocking any coldness from reaching your skin. He froze as you moved, thinking you had woken up, but sighed as he saw you snuggling into the warm comfort of the blanket, continuing your peaceful nap.

He cleaned the area around you, the tissues, empty soda cans, empty chips. You must’ve eaten yourself into a food coma, he thought, smiling at the thought of your well fed self falling into a deep sleep. However his smile dropped as your phone lights up. Rows and rows of notifications piled up on your lockscreen, all from your boyfriend begging you to ‘take him back’, ‘forgive him’, ‘trust him to do better’. And then it made sense to him. The food, the tissues, your exhaustion.

Once he finished cleaning up, he just couldn’t find himself to leave you in the living room all alone. You must have been sad, angry, upset, tired and vulnerable right now, and he would hate himself if he knew he was leaving you in such a state.

He also couldn’t get over the last notification he saw from your phone–he knows that it wasn’t the best thing to go scroll your notifications, but it was there and he couldn’t help it (pls forgive him)-- ‘I can be better than him’.

Him?

Is there someone new?

He sat on the ottoman, beside where your head was laying on the pillow and watched as you breathed. Your chest would rise and fall in steady patterns, showing that you’ve fallen into a deep sleep. Your eyelashes were feathered along your eye, and he couldn’t help but be charmed by it. Him, charmed by the simple sight of eyelashes? He couldn’t believe how much he changed, how much you changed him. Your lips were slightly parted, a pale pink and full. He wondered how it would feel against his own, would they be soft? By the looks of it, he thinks it would.

You looked so peaceful and angelic and he couldn’t help but think about how much you’re going through right now. He thought about your mind, how crazy it must be, how tiring it must be. Who’s on your mind right now? Who has your time? Who have you been seeing? Why couldn’t you just be his?

He knows that you had a boyfriend but still, despite that, why did you stop talking to him as much? You used to be texting him all the time, checking on him all the time, staying up with him all the time. But recently, your interactions were shorter than two sentences. Was it your boyfriend? Was it you? Was it him?

“If you let me,” he whispered, tucking a stray piece of hair behind your ear gently, “we could paint a perfect picture, we could even last forever.” he sighed as he feels how strong he loves you–it scares him, he’s never felt this way with anyone before. “I’ll even let you wear my sweaters, I know how you get cold so easily,” he said as his eyes traced your face, from your hairline down to your eyebrows to your eyes, to your nose to your lips. He smiled at how perfect you were. “I’m so horribly down for you, Y/N,” he said, “for the worse or the better,” he added.

“To be honest, I hate it,” he said, surprising himself with the sudden confession, “I hate how much I feel for you because It’s so strong that it’s hurting me. But I don’t care, I will keep sticking to you, Y/n,” he breathed in, “Because I love you.”

And although you were sound asleep, he still felt as if the weight of the world has left his shoulders. The burden of keeping it trapped within his heart has finally disappeared, and even though he knew that this confession was done in vain as he knew that pouring his heart out doesn’t mean you have to reciprocate it, he still felt happy that it’s out there.

Maybe you were asleep, but your heart was listening.

He noticed how the sun had disappeared and the clock was moving into the double digits. He knew that your back was going to be painful if you slept there overnight, so he took you in his arms, the blanket wrapped tightly around you still; like a burrito, and carried you over to your room. There he tucked you in properly, propping your head gently a top your soft pillows, laying the comforter over your, keeping the sides snug. Before he turned off the side lamp, his self control had left his body with his confession as he bent down placing a gentle peck on your forehead. When he felt that everything was done, windows checked, you tucked in, lamp turned off, he headed out the door.

“Jeonghan,” you called softly, your voice still groggy from your nap. He froze by the doorframe, turning to you.

“Yeah?”

“I love you too,” you told him, a soft smile growing on your face before you turned over and fell back to sleep.

No amount of self control could stop the smile that was blooming on his face, his mind was fuzzy, his heart was racing. He watched you for a little bit more, the same love-struck smile on his face to see if you were still sleeping.

“Sweet dreams, love,” he whispered before leaving.

He needs to give Seungkwan a gift basket.

-fin.

Like, comment and reblog pls :)

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prettymrswright · 3 months

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Lockdown. Pt 2

pairing: koffee!singer x black fem!choreographer/artist

content warnings: smuttt baby, off the bat! 😂 it was highly requested for Koffee, so as an artist I must deliver. a lot of patois (Koffee is from Spanish Town, she has a strong JA accent).,fluff, strong language, spirituality, art.

a/n: dusting off the pen and paper, (or should i say keyboard), and this was requested the most, so we start here. also, she has a new masterlist design 🤭!!! shout out to my baby, @dejaonline the creator and visionary of my carrd. my taglist is on there if you want to sign up for a specific person or take yourself out of one!!! i missed writing, so this should be fun. love you wh^res <3

translations:

did - past tense

don't? - right? / isn't it?

A suh - so/how

eno - you know

mek - let

ramp - play/ play around

Jah/ Jah Jah - God

yah - here

Gyalis - player/ ladies (wo)man

guh - go

taglist: @dejaonline @prophetalmighty @saintwrld @sapphicvqmpires @inmyheadimobsessed @kisskourt @shurislover @ventingfanfics @vampzxi @abenomeiiii @koffeewife @bbbbbbrilliantly @shuriislut @sopaintercrown @billyjeanonthed

LOCKDOWN PART 1. < if you haven’t read :)

Her mid-back length locs hung down, framing your face as she rocked into your clit, her firm hands gripping you in place. She had her warm, dark brown eyes locked with yours, her bottom lip trapped by her top row of teeth.

"Fuck, Mikayla," You cried out, eyes welling up with tears from the multiple sensations she was giving you. She kissed your slightly parted lips and down the side of your neck.

Your moans and cries flew through her ears like music she loved, encouraging her every action. Her fingers interlocked with yours as she pinned them by your sides, continuing to fluidly move across your center.

"Mhm," You moaned through sealed lips, trying to contain its volume, but it was no use.

"Open up, pretty girl," The singer demanded, and you shortly obliged. She sat up tall and slipped two of her slender fingers inside your creamy center, pumping with precision. If you weren't going to get loud, she would surely make you.

She didn't care for your shy act. She wanted the sex to embody exactly what it was made for; passion. Be loud, be raunchy. If she decided to make love to you, it was with full intention.

She stroked her fingers long and deep inside you, her other hand massaging your right nipple.

"Oh my god," you breathed out as you felt your mouth began to water. You reached your hand out to place it on her chiseled stomach, in attempts to slow her pace, but she smacked it away.

"Doh touch me." She spat. "A dis yuh did want, don't?"

She teased and you whined. You did want her, God did you ever.

You feel yourself creaming around her fingers, and as much as it was, you never wanted it to stop.

"That is it, mumma, yes," She encouraged the beginning of your release. "Let it go fi mi."

Your voice traveled the room as you came harder from the rich, raspiness of her voice. She was trying to draw you out, and it was working.

You grabbed her hand and licked yourself clean off her fingers, still making noise and staring her directly in her eyes.

"Mm," She gave a hum of arousal at the sight. "A suh you wicked?"

You heartily chuckled at her astonishment. Before she could react further, you pushed her off of you and onto the bed. You locked your legs between hers, ass facing her, giving her a rear view of your ride.

You bounced up and down on all fours, riding her clit, back deeply arched. You felt the secretion of the two of you building and sloshing against each other.

“Shit,” She exclaimed, mesmerized by the movement of your ass. She sent a sharp pop upside it, making it shake even more. “You feel so good, y/n.”

You looked back at her and smiled devilishly. Provoked by your gesture, she pulls you back by your hips and drives hers up against yours at a faster pace.

“Ohhh, shit!” You yelled. “Fuckkk, yes, don’t stop, please!” You begged, riding the high of your warm clits colliding and her soft, strong hands gripping your sides, thumbs settled in your back dimples.

“Aghhh,” She groaned, her clit beginning to twitch underneath you. “Mm, mm, no,” She shook her head and pinned you down. She wasn’t quite ready for her release. A bit into edging, but more-so for maximum release.

She kept one hand pinning your stomach down to the bed, grabbing her strap from off the dresser and slipping it on with the other. She rubbed your entrance slightly before heading in, no lubricant needed, the way she had your water running.

“Baby,” you whined out, slightly in panic. It had been a minute, but the last time she put this on you, you were in an over 24 hour recovery. She was dangerous, but you liked danger.

“Shhh,” She whispered in your ear, grabbing a handful of your hair, slightly craning your neck. “Yuh fi tek dis. Wul’ on to me.”

She folded one arm behind your back and held your forearm while she held yours. Swiftly, she slid her length up into you.

“Sssshit!” You hissed, feeling woozy at its depth. “I can’t, baby I can’t.”

“Believe inna yuh self, miss,” She chuckled, before stroking your middle, mid-tempo.

You reached your hand back, pressing your hand back onto her chiseled stomach, and quickly you’d realize that was a mistake. She now had both of your arms pinned and was now picking up her pace.

Your body began to sweat profusely and your legs began to quiver underneath her.

“Mmmm, fuck!” Your moans being drowned out in the pillow your face was stuffed in, the cloth held captive between your teeth. “‘Kayla, please,”

“Memba yuh did wan run weh from me? Hmm?” She antagonized, pumping deeper and faster.

“No, please,” You plead and plead. “Please, baby I’m sorry,”

It was clear she was holding more of a grudge than you thought, and you were certainly paying for it right now.

She hiked you up, forcing your back to her chest, and your ear to her lips.

“Don’t do that to me, again.” She sternly warned, sending shivers down your spine. Overtaken and out of breath, all you could do was nod.

In a quick motion she slid out and turned you over. Your doe eyes, full of lust and adornment, were staring directly up at her. She stared back intently and smiled.

“Mi did miss yuh pretty face, eno,” She confessed. Without giving you time to respond, she was inside you again.

“I—“ You gasped out, clawing at her arms that were pinned at your sides. She held your knees to your chest and gave you long, deep strokes, kissing up and around your legs.

“Oh my goddd,” Your head drops back and your eyes follow, rolling into your lids. You haven’t felt this good since you seen her last. It was like the first time all over again. Every stroke, every kiss, every whisper; you constantly had to fight not to blurt out those three words.

The way she looked, the way she felt, the way she prioritized your body’s every demand made you feel the sluttiest you could ever.

You held your middle and index finger up over her lips and smoothed them across them, and she lubricated them with her saliva, lightly sucking on your digits. You slide those fingers down to your clit and massage small, quick circles into it.

You feel your mouth begin to water at the combination.

“Yesss, just like that, baby, keep fucking me,” You encourage her sinisterly, directly staring into her face. “You make me feel so good,”

You didn’t give a fuck anymore. You missed her, it’s been months, and you were over the games. This was the side she so desperately wanted to see.

“Shit,” she grunted under her breath, strokes getting sloppier the wetter you became. “I love seeing you play with that pretty pussy, baby.” She affirmed you, making your moans spill out quicker.

She replaced your hand with hers, caressing your clit with her thumb, bringing her body down to level with yours. She kissed you slowly and passionately, still keeping the pace of both her stroking and massaging.

You moaned loudly into her mouth, wrapping your arms around her, digging your nails into her back. The pleasure was so overwhelming yet so blissful.

“I’m so close, ‘kay, don’t stop,” You whined, squirming under her touch.

“This is all yuh did want, ee? Fi di artist come fuck you?” She teased. “All you had to was ask.”

The more cockier she became the more it turned you on. It was impossible to keep quiet or still. You began to see stars, the way she was pounding your g.

“You want to come? Ask me.” She taunted you.

“Please make me come, baby, I’ve been so good,” Your mouth was moving faster than your brain. All of your words were rushed and desperate. Each of your fingers seeking deeper in her back.

She wrapped her hand around your neck and pulled your forehead to hers, speeding up her final strokes.

“Unhhh, yesss!” You screamed at the top of your lungs as your love came down, creaming all over her length before she slid out.

Your chest heaved up and down, as you attempted to catch your breath.

“Mek mi clean this up for you,” She lowered her lips. to your center and licked you clean, devouring you with her whole mouth, ending her sweep with a slow french kiss.

“Oh, baby,” you whined out, rubbing your fingers through her locs and grabbing a handful. You guide her head left and right in a figure 8 motion, leading her to shake her head in it.

She rocked your hips into her face, sucking your bud, draining the rest of your secretion out.

Tears involuntarily streamed down your face, as you semi-hyperventilated. You pulled her up to you, kissed her deeply, and wrapped your arms around her in a warm embrace.

“Yuh alright?” She asked half sincerely, half in amusement.

“I love you,” You blurt out, not expecting a response.

She erupted in a high-pitched cackle. “You funny eno, yuh ramp too much,”

You smile brightly, eyes still almost shut. “I’m serious!”

“Gyal get the steel pipe, and wan chat bout ‘love’” She continued, still laughing.

“Shut up, Mikayla,” You couldn’t help but laugh too. The jokester she was.

“Mi ago give yuh a second, eno, but mi wan yuh fi get dressed,” She says to you, hinting at another one of her shenanigans.

“Dressed? Fi wha?” You say back in patois, semi-mimicking her.

“I wanna show you something. Something i’ve been working on,” She says, sincerely.

You tense up anxiously. “Okay…”

“It’s not anything bad, nuh worry yuhself,” She reassures you, in attempts to calm your nerves.

$ Walking out the hotel in your black, Chanel mini dress, and your black and gold Yves Saint Laurent heels (gifted by Koffee), you head to the car, hand in hand with the artist. She walks with you over to the passenger door side and opens it for you, helping you inside.

After she closes your door, you watch her 5'6 frame walk to the driver side, dressed in a powder blue, mid-sleeved, collared button down, the first three buttons open, slightly exposing her chest. Her legs decorated in some baggy leather pants, that slightly covered her baby blue, designer sneakers. Her locs were neatly compacted up into a bun, gold jewelry hanging from her neck, and wrists. If it wasn't for whatever she was attempting to show you, you'd pull her right back in that hotel. "Yuh ready?" She asks, quickly smiling and your direction while starting up the engine. You smile and nod sweetly and the two of you drive off. The sun didn't begin to set quite yet, but it was at it's golden hour, shining bright and beautiful hues of yellow, orange, and gold down from the sky blue skies and through the windshield of Koffee's 2022 Midnight Gray Lexus ES. You were riding through the city of Ocho Rios, taking scenic view of all of nature around you; trees and bushes blowing through the wind. You'd be flying back home soon, so you wanted to be completely present. You slid and placed your hand onto the back of her neck, massaging it with your fingers, and you felt the tiny baby hairs stand up. Koffee loved how touchy-feely you were and always returned the favor. She slid her right hand, currently decorated with a 18k gold signet ring, gifted by her grandfather, up your thigh and held you in her grip. As you pass more and more tall buildings and music shops, you began to get curious. The two of you would often parlay on the beaches and spend all evening/night and sometimes, even early mornings. But this was a new side of town. It seemed more industrial. "Mikayla," You spoke in a questioning tone. "Hm?" She replied plainly. "Where we going?" You ask. "You'll see." She replies, that smile she had been showing so often this trip appearing once again.

Pulling up to a complex, you park right in front of a building with ‘Columbia’ written in gold letters across the top. You feel an anxiousness in your stomach once you start to realize where you were.

“Come on,” She gestured as she went to open the door. “Hold on," you say quickly, stopping her from opening the door. You pull down the sun visor mirror and prep up your appearance. You adjust your gold heart pendant necklace and smooth out your braids. You reapply your Fenty gloss bomb lipgloss and blot. You lift your foot up and rest the end of your heel on the dashboard, adjusting your shoe strap and your single-plated gold anklet that was resting so pretty on your ankle. “Girl, come on,” She rushed you semi-jokingly, despite her being in a daze previously to. “Okay, okay, how do I look?” You turn to her and fake a pose, framing your face. She took a long, studious look at you, examining you swiftly but diligently. She hummed in approval. “Sexy.”

“Perfect. Let’s go!” You laugh, grabbing your purse. Koffee comes out of the car, rushing over to you to open your door and take your hand to lift you up and out and lead you into the building. It was huge. Tall lobby ceiling, marble floors, futuristic colors. It was like a hotel lobby of a nightclub, if such a thing existed. She signs the two of you in, and you walk into the elevator and ride up to the 22nd floor. She leads you into a room that she opens with her own key that hung off her hip. You audibly gasp at the sight of what you saw before you. It was her studio. And it was beautiful. There was a long white mixing console, two large white speakers next to it and a computer in the middle. A large booth, next to a small one, both with mics, headphones, and other equipment set up. The room was dimly lit with midnight purple and fuschia colored lights. Across each wall were plaques of achievements from various artists. There were long, white couches on each side of the room, and tall stool chairs spread out across it. In between the two booths, up against the wall were a lineup of different guitars.

You slowly strolled through the room, taking everything in. You looked to your left and noticed a pretty, black bouquet of pink glitter roses, Ghiradelli chocolates, a card, and a fat stack of cash sitting on a low table.

“Wha–” Before you could even ask what the purpose of those were, she interrupted you. “Once Shelley told me you were coming, I couldn’t pass up the opportunity. I missed you, y/n/n. And I’m serious about you.” She confesses, holding her glance, as well as your hand. “Kay,” You called out her nickname, feeling your eyes well with tears. She was so sweet and thoughtful. And all this time you were blocking your blessing, and for what? “Doh start,” She chuckled. “Jah. This crybaby, yah.” And you were. But you felt everything so deeply, and as in awe as you were, you were also sad; Somewhat regretful even, for driving a wedge between you two because of your own insecurities. “Thank you, baby.” You thank her with a heart full of love and gratitude. You wrapped your arms around her neck and placed a soft kiss on her lips. “How romantic. Miss Gyalis.” “Please,” She started. “Me anuh Gyalis, and you aren’t just ‘gyal’ to me.”

You studied her face, admiring both her beauty and her words. “Come,” She led you to the seats in front of the computer and pulled up a song. “Tell me what you think about this.” The song began and the summery, mid-tempo beat flowed out of the speakers and filled up the room.

Where will we go?

When di quarantine ting done and everybody touch road?

Mommy, me go NASCAR

Pull up in a fast car, yeah

A nuh false start

Mek you and di boss par, yeah

I know you’re feeling me

You know I’m feeling you

So what now we fi do?

You swayed back and forth and slightly nodded your head. She was so good at what she did. Every song made you feel good, like a fun summer night. You didn’t even notice what it really was about at first.

Yeah, yeah

Aye fancy

How yuh heart stay, it nah no vacancy?

Last time see yuh pon FaceTime

Chatting up di place

Bout you nuh want relationship

Me a go put you pon lock down

A put yuh body pon lockdown, mmm

You got me pon lock now

You got my passion on lock, woah

She turned to you, lip syncing her own lyrics at you.

If you love me

You should let me

You should let me know

And if you don’t know

Better fi let me

A better yuh let me go

You took in every word, flattered at its insinuating dedication, but shocked at her confession. Sure you knew she liked you, but not like this. You also didn’t want to assume. It was hard to take in.

All yuh want talk bout a matrimony, yeah

Any ting yuh want Koffee got di money, yeah

Me give yuh me heart beg yuh take it from me

She dramatically mimicked the lyrics, clutching her chest and kneeling at your feet, making you laugh. She was cute. And the song was really damn good.

Baby are you feeling me?

Cause I'm really feeling you

Baby are you feeling me?

Cause I'm really feeling you

I'm a pull up in my fast car You were silent for a while as the song outro faded out. You were speechless. You stared for a while, going through about every emotion and thought you had the past few months. You’d open your mouth to speak, but nothing came out. “That bad, huh?” She asked comically.

“No!” You rushed out. “It was.. beautiful.” You look around you, still finding the words. “When did you-?”

“Early April. Last time mi did hear from you was March, and mi stop call from den. Mi feelings hurt bad bad. So I took up the pain and drive guh a studio wid it.” “Oh,” You say lowly. “Kay, I’m sorry. I mean, not totally because, you just made a HIT song– yes I said hit— AND it’s about me, so that’s double whammy right there.”

She laughed heartily, leaning back in her chair. “You ramp too much.” “All jokes aside, though. I was in my head so much that I didn’t give you a chance to show me how much you cared. Truthfully cuz I felt like I cared too much. I was anticipating getting hurt, and that wasn’t fair to you or myself.” She looked down and nodded in agreement. “Mi just glad seh you found your way back to me, baby.” She placed a warm, caring kiss on your cheek. “And I love you too.”

You left your chair and opted for a seat on her lap, resting your arm around her back and on her shoulder. “Play it for me, again?” You asked with a beaming smile. She returned a beaming one back to you before pressing the play button on the mixing console in front of her, holding you tighter the second time around.

#koffee #koffee x reader #prettymrswright #black sapphic

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multifandomworldsposts · 1 year

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We Met in Tampa PT 5

A/N: the Elvis movie plot but Y/N version!!

pairing: austin!elvis x reader

Warning: fluff, america burning to the ground, the colonel being an asshole ONCE AGAIN

Y/N POV

When Elvis came back from the Army he got in a movie and he wanted to get married so I invited my family to come up to Las Vegas, we had a hell of a time! Our wedding was perfect! I never seen my parents so happy for me in my life, they wanted my wedding day to be the best day that they can witness! Several months later, our beautiful daughter, Evelyn Presley came in to the world! My family would come up to Memphis to visit her and they would stay at Graceland when Elvis would do a movie.

Elvis got a lot of movie roles and he wanted me to go to the sets but I kinda got scared to because maybe the producers didn’t want me there because I’m too ‘distracting’ to Elvis.

His friends also known as, Memphis Mafia, they’re really nice but we would kinda get along sometimes. They always do dumb things when they would be at Graceland or at a movie set.

‘Dr. Martin Luther King jr., the apostle of non-violence in the Civil Rights movement, has been shot to death in Memphis, Tennessee.’

I already know that Elvis is crushed by this, I am as well, we watched his ‘I Have a Dream’ speech and it was inspiring, we support the Civil Rights Movement.

I hold Evelyn in my arms while Vernon is saying, “With the sale of the ranch and the horses, that’s gonna cover the payroll, but as for the security at graceland…” I look at Evelyn, looking sleepy as ever.

I listen to the radio hearing MLK news, Elvis walks up with Evelyn, I turn the volume up and I get closer to the both of them and says, “Memphis is burning.”

Elvis hands me Eve and I rock her gently and see John F. Kennedy talking about MLK. Elvis walks off to talk to the Colonel and I set Evelyn down in her little crib and walk up to Elvis and wrapped my left arm around him.

“We’ve seen “Elvis the Rebel, we’ve seen “Elvis the Movie Star.”

Now we will see “Elvis the Family Entertainer.” I look at him then hear Jerry say, “And appliance salesman?” Elvis, the Colonel, and I look at Jerry and Elvis says, “What did you say? Listen, Jerry, I don’t need you to question me about how I support my family and every goddamn person here you understand stand me?” I look at Elvis walking away hearing, “Laugh it up, assholes.” He slams the door to his trailer.

I walk in the trailer to find Elvis and I see him with a radio, I lean on a wall to look at him, “Hi.” I said.

He turns the radio off. “Can I watch the memorial with you?”

“Yeah, baby.” He puts his right hand out for me to sit next to him.

“I’m so tired of playing Elvis Presley. Too many people rely on me.” I sigh, “I love you and your daughter loves you.” I whimper to him.

“We don’t care about the money or anything else. We just want you to be happy. You’re only really happy when you sing the music you love.” I kiss his forehead.

I look at the TV and hear “Mahalia Jackson, I used to hear her sing at East Street Church.” I look at him.

“That’s the music that makes me happy.” Elvis points at the TV, I keep on watching the memorial.

Elvis meets up with a guy name, Steve Binder, about his Christmas Special. Elvis tells me about what he’s going to do, and it’s not a christmas special, it’s something different.

I wait for Elvis to get ready for the small stage, he looks good in a leather suit. He comes up to me and gives me a kiss, I kiss him back. I hope this goes well for him. The audience starts to clap when he went up on the stage. Jerry took me to esclusive area to see Elvis better.

‘Well, it’s down at the end Of Lonely Town’

He’s like a new Elvis but the same Elvis like I saw him at Russwood Park. He starts to sing Hound Dog and I get the feeling I had back when we met. He’s still the amazing guy. Jailhouse Rock comes on, he does new moves I haven’t seen before.

“Bobby Kennedy has been shot!” We run in the green room to see the TV and everyone is silent. I start to shake a little. What’s happening in America? Elvis holds me close, I hug him. Steve turns the TV volume down and says, “Listen, I, uh…. I just want to say that…” I can tell he want to cry.

“We have to say something. You…” He looks at Elvis, “have to make a statement, E.P.”

“Mr. Presley doesn’t make statements, he sings ‘Here Comes Santa Claus.’ and wishes everyone, ‘Merry Christmas and good night.’ I hate the Colonel. He rubs me the wrong way. The Colonel shuts off the TV.

Jerry and I hear music so we go in the sounding room, it’s Elvis singing a new song, it sounds amazing.

‘Still, I am sure that the answer’s answer’s gonna come somehow’

I continue to watch, I’m in awe.

‘While I can talk while I can stand while walk while I can dream oh, please let my dream come true, oh right now’

I clap a little but I can see the Colonel looking pissed. I can tell that, that song is going to be huge.

#fanfic #austin butler #elvis presley #elvis the movie #baz luhrmann elvis #austin!elvis fluff #austin butler fluff #austin butler fanfiction #austin!elvis x reader #elvis 2022 #elvis presley fanfiction #elvis presley x reader #fanfaction #fanfiction #memphis mafia #elvis the pelvis

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makima-s-most-smile · 10 months

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Trigun Maximum 1

Hahaha, I am getting closer to the others. Soon I’ll catch up to the book club. This goal is both normal and possible to achieve! And I finally got how to do more than 10 pics… So less parts. MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA, I have all the power now! Edit: Hahaha, I failed. Too much to waffle about and too many nice screenshots. Help me...

Chapter 01: Hero Reborn

And the sheriff was killed off on the first page. New readers get an immediate taste of how No-Man’s-Land works and we old readers get reminded that the world is extremely gritty.

WooWoo! *squeals* He is our point of reference again. I love how he just takes everything in when he gets off the bus, keeping his distance from the trouble around him and just going for his goal. He is a passive observer, like us! We don’t know his angle or his motivations yet. He is as much a stranger to us as to the rest of the world.

Again, just by his style, he is something we are very used to (typical japanese salary man), but at the same time a total outlier to the wild west design of the world. Especially with how he is framed like this, just a black colour compared to the other more western clothes style of the cowboys. Old readers may read him with more of a bit of distrust, but new readers see him with curious eyes.

Okay, correct me if I am wrong, is his titwindow smaller in the earlier volumes? Or did BLR just totally screw me up? Because this is not a titwindow for me! That is just an open collar.

Gosh, Woowoo has the best faces.

Ahhh… the good old “Ey, bartender, tell me the newest rumours”-trope. Every DnD-games needs it!

Nightow just randomly blew up many innocents, including babies, who urged and pushed to get to leave the town with the bus. And everyone just sits there and does nothing. Damn. Well, the sheriff just died, but damn. People really grow apathetic with all the violence around. As long as it doesn’t hurt them or their closest. I have to be honest, I wouldn’t be much different, I think. :/ People just endure.

New readers do not know what happened and they don’t get much exposition, especially the crucial Knives' scene. I wouldn’t say that this is a good move by Nightow. It shifts the tone a bit. But they get to know the gist of what supposedly happened. It tells us how the whole world sees Vash. Old readers already know, but new readers soon will learn about the blatant discrepancy between Vash and The humanoid typhoon. And that point, I feel, is really well done.

I think it is a little bit sad that I don’t see anywhere implied that Wolfwood knows what truly happened. I don’t think we ever get reminded of that little part though it is such an important part for Wolfwood’s characterization. It is the reason he knows so much and the reason why he is struggling so much with his perception of Vash.

Sorry, but that smirk. That has to mean that being a priest while carrying his cross machine gun is a fucking joke for Wolfwood. Only he is privy to it. His own running inside joke that hides the pain that comes with it.

Was the sheriff the minister, too? Or did they both go to placate the evil Vash? Or was he just a random bystander/on the bus on the way out?

This… Is what I headcanon how Wolfwood mostly gets his money from, next to hunting possible bounties and his "tradesman" skill. (I am not over my tradesman perception and I never will, fight me on this, please) He goes from city to city and helping out where no priest is, giving last blessing, first blessing and all the shebang.

Immediate recognition! It’s your dream man, Wolfy! Go get him! Have a lifechanging journey! Find a good place to rest together and find yourself and each other!

I feel Lina on a personal level and Vash… sorry, just no. Really JUST NO! How about you let your body be used against your will for the enjoyment of oth… Oh… VASH, THAT IS EVEN WORSE NOW! (He makes me so angry in this scene that I could only react with sarcasm…) I know this is Vash at his weakest, but still. Bodily autonomy is something very important in this manga (something I will come back to in 9 volumes), Vash regularly gave up his right to his physical integrity, but that was (except with Knives) by his own choice. Lina didn’t have this choice. Should she really be forced to decide between her life and her bodily autonomy?

I think there is at least one other instance where Wolfwood cannot eat his food in peace and… I love this gag. Let Wolfwood eat in peace! But gimme 20 more of these! Please!

Vash has truly lost himself. Someone who makes such demands, isn’t interested in holding his word. This is a sadist who wants to kick someone already down. Even worse for Vash, while abusing his image to do so. And Vash still complies! The image of the humanoid typhoon is so strongly connected to his trauma, that Vash just gives in with the hope that if he just puts his head down, everything will be fine. But it won’t. People just trying to leave get shot up in a bus, the dutiful sheriff got killed. Someone with the firepower to do so needs to stop these people. If you give in to bullies, they will continue and get worse. The image of the humanoid typhoon and his presence won't leave, if you ignore it, Vash.

Wolfwood and Vash seem too familiar in the way they act. It feels a bit weird, when the last thing we saw was that Wolfwood was scared shitless by the fifth moon incident where he barely came out with his life, cursing Vash. I know our babies had this immediate bronection, but it is such a strange change.

In this scene though, I understand. The guys are pisstalking. Putting down Vash and building up their own bravado in doing so. “Hurgh, yeah, I am so cool, I wouldn’t beg for my life, much less for the life of a loved on, fuck yeah.” And they needed to be put down a peg. It takes courage to humiliate yourself. As much as a miserable display it was for the Vash we knew, it took courage!

I truly love when Wolfwood uses the Punisher as a blunt weapon. He used it in Ultimate to put down the controlled Slavers and I just love it. Use that Mega Stake Machine Gun as a blunt force weapon! (I hope someone gets it… I am old… Please.)

New plantpower shown! No wonder Vash can treat himself so haphazardly… I feel it blinds his perspective on humans and their decision quite a bit. A human would have most likely died, being shot like that.

Huff, this scene… Is Vash calling his situation/predicament that or is he calling Wolfwood a hound of hell (funny… Wolf… Hound…) or is it just his name that follows him in the form of the false Vash? All three possible.

And Wolfwood giving him the revolver. He looks so serious there. Maybe even remorseful. Wolfwood knows what he is doing in that moment. He doesn't like it.

Doesn’t Wolfwood just outright tell Vash that he was either there when Knives took over or has something to do with them in that scene? He never saw the gun in his time with Vash, as far as we readers have seen (‘98 on the other hand knows the gun personally). The only time Vash had his gun out was in his fight with Knives. WHY DO I REMEMBER WOLFWOOD AS THIS GUY WHO KEPT HIS MOUTH SHUT WHEN HE IS SO FUCKING OPEN ABOUT EVERYTHING?! HE IS JUST NOT SPELLING IT OUT…

The reveal, this over the top kick arse stance, it is so silly. I love it. Wolfwood must feel very cool in that moment and then Vash goes: “Yeah, but no killing, priest.”

I’ve seen some confusion about Vash maybe knowing about the gun, but he looks seriously surprised. But I have a middle ground. Vash was able to smell gun oil and powder on Meryl (in the ‘98 anime, I don’t know if that was in the manga, too.), so I propose that Vash knew that Wolfwood was carrying a gun in some form or the other, he may have even pegged the cross as somehow holding the gun, he just didn’t know that the whole cross was a machine gun torpedo thrower gun.

I love how they immeditaly start bickering. While they massively vibed in Ultimate, this is the true start of their bromance/romance. Two idiots being able to be themselves around each other. And they deserve it.

I love how Wolfwood holds cigarettes. It’s so gender. Which one? How? Dunno, it just is.

These will never not be funny. Wolfwood is so cute in them and just a childish dude. I love those pics. They are with my favourite ones.

Chapter 2: Lina

Worm birds! Wormbirds! Worirds! Words! Wait… that doesn’t work. Bird worms! Birdworms! Birrms! Eh… Borms? BORMS! BORMS! BORMS! BORMS!

Lina and Granny are one of the few reasons why Vash still has hope in humanity. Two people who don’t live the easiest life being an old woman and a girl of (then) 10 that only have each other. They took him in and took care of him when he needed it the most. He barely survived his body being taken over against his will, losing all his agency and being used to kill countless humans. He looks like he is barely there at the moment, just a hull of a human. And they took care of him. Lina and Granny are good people.

Aww, look, they are playfighting! Bickering as always, but Wolfwood gives Vash important info and tells more about himself than he maybe even realises.

Wolfwood says that he looked for Vash for two years, but the reason he gives is the town from six months ago. He is contradicting himself. Sure, there could be other reasons given, but Wolfwood does not give them. He is completely sus.

I love the composition. Knives is angled towering over Wolfwood, his chest? Spike dangling over Wolfwood like a damocles’ sword. Just one movement and Wolfwood dies. Foreshadowing? Or symbolism for Wolfwood’s position as an agent of the Gun-Ho-Guns as someone with morality, but being forced into a position that goes fully against it. Wolfwood, the man without any agency, indeed.

But Stop it, Knives! Griffith from Berzerk did the BDSM-getup first.

Again, Wolfwood being crystal clear, but avoidant. It is just so weird to read. Vash knows, he has to know it by that point. But as long as either speaks it out loud, they can pretend. They can still be on friendly terms.

Three days? Surely not only a deadline for Vash to take his time with his goodbye for his family, but also time for Wolfwood to bless all the funerals as a priest.

How easily the town turns on Vash. It is easy to other people instead of trying to reflect on their previous notions. Vash may have shot a hole into the moon, but Eriks undressed and played a dog so his little adoptive sister may be spared. All the while, these same people watched and did nothing. Witch hunts are easy, aren’t they?

I also like to stress the point they make. Wolfwood is not normal, either! As much as our favourite priest clings to his humanity, what he did with Vash shows an inhuman level of skill. He would hate it, but people group him in with the plant man. Even more important, they did not even kill 60, they incapacitated them with guns! A much more difficult feat! Especially with a machine gun! Our focal point to bench a normal reaction to Vash is an absolute outlier in this world. What does it mean? Is it a reminder that we as readers from the modern time deal with Vash through a different lens than the people of No-Man’s-Land? What does that mean for our judgement? Or is this the beginning juxtaposition to steer our focus on Wolfwood’s arc, too?

Vash. Let. People. Make. Informed. Decisions. This is an ongoing shonen/seinen trope. I despise it. “OoOOOOoooh, no, I cannot tell my (most likely) female companion the whole story. It could put them in danger!” How? They are alone in the room (Sure, worms, but would Zazie care about that? Is Vash even aware of them at this point?) It reads like a chauvinistic deflection so he does not need to open up. He takes her ability to decide for herself with that behaviour. It is patronising and infantilizes his companions. What he really says is: “I can’t tell you my whole story. It would make me feel vulnerable and opens me up to get rejected.” And I know, this is about not spilling the whole backstory to the readers and it is also a point of Vash’s character arc to learn to open up to other people. Vash is by no means the worst offender and it is not without reason that he acts this way. But what is his fear here exactly? That Lina and Granny would go around and tell other people the truth? That they decide to follow him? Or just that they may throw him out and deny their connection? His fears are larger than his trust in his chosen family. And that stings.

Granny is at least not wrong with her assumption that cutting himself off from his peers and close ones makes Vash vulnerable to get into such a situation again, to get hurt again...

Also, hehe, Lina’s leggy!

I am thinking about Lina’s and Granny’s backstory. We get none. They take in a complete stranger that stumbles in completely exhausted and beaten up. The two women don’t live together just for jokes. Where is the rest? I assume that they both lost Lina’s parents in the past, leaving Granny being her only caretaker. Lina is an orphan. She doesn’t have it the worst, having still Granny around and both of them being able to live comfortably. But that does not mean she has no scars on her soul. In this village/city, she seems to be the outlier. We don’t get to see other children, even less so other girls. She is lonely and only has Vash and Granny.

And that’s how Vash was able to fit into the village. A new (male), (somewhat) able bodied caretaker for Lina.

At the start of the last chapter, Eriks was a complete pushover. The little dude abused Erik’s mental state. But now, Vash has found himself again. Not completely, but he is not willing to risk his loved ones wellbeing for that little twerp. Twerp is about to get a rude awakening. We, the readers, get a beautiful scene, where Vash’s actions counteract the things just said. Love it! We the reader see Vash's developement back to his nearly old self and reap the spoils from it in this scene!

Everything about this is just so fucking hilarious. The energetic circling of Vash, Wolfwood’s whole body, the hair, the eye, the speedlines on everything! It looks so stupid, but it is art anyways.

When your buddy does something so stupid, you need to take off your sunglasses to see it better!

I love Vash’s threat that follows. It brings the point home of how dangerous he really can be. I don’t believe that he’d kill the tiny man, but…

The duality of Wolfwood, dumbass by Vash, a reasonable, sensitive adult by grieving people. As much as he tries to deny it, he has a conscience and a strict moral code. Sadly, reality forces him often to not abide by it. And it burdens him every day.

Vash leaving is heartbreaking. I hope he reconnects to them in the aftermath of Trimax. They became part of his family and he is right that they saved him. He should cherish them.

#trigun bookclub #trigunbookclub #Trigun Maximum 1 #why am I talking so much? Oh I love the series that's why #Trigun

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hldailyupdate · 2 years

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Harry Styles: the world’s most wanted man

Harry Styles has become a global pop icon. Now, he has his sights set on Hollywood. How does he make all of it look so easy — even when it definitely isn’t?

On a Friday night in New York, Harry Styles put on a show.

It wasn’t just any show; it was the first time he performed his third and soon-to-be-biggest album, Harry’s House, in its entirety. The crowd that May night covered Long Island’s UBS Arena in feathers and glitter and tears — a ritualistic skin shedding of sorts whenever Styles comes to town.

Fans noticed something different about the encore: Styles didn’t end with his usual closer, ‘Kiwi’; instead, he opted to finish the night with a second performance of his new single ‘As It Was’, his dance-through-the-tears pandemic reflection on isolation and change. When he played it, the crowd exploded in a way even Styles had never experienced. It left him a bit shaken.

“We came offstage, and I went into my dressing room and just wanted to sit by myself for a minute,” he tells me, two months later. “After One Direction, I didn’t expect to ever experience anything new. I kind of felt like, ‘All right, I’ve seen how crazy it can get.’ And I think there was something about it where I was… not terrified, but I just needed a minute. Because I wasn’t sure what it was. Just that the energy felt insane.”

Before his headlining set at Coachella in April, I caught Harry backstage, surrounded by James Corden, Styles’s onstage guest Shania Twain, and his girlfriend, Olivia Wilde. Later, I took in sold-out shows in New York and at Wembley Stadium. The immense love showering Styles was impossible to ignore — you see it in the faces of every fan, whether they’ve been supporting him for “one year, two years, five years, 12 years”, as he says in nearly every end-of-show thank you speech. Along the way I heard him everywhere, even when I wasn’t trying. ‘As It Was’ played in every cab. ‘Watermelon Sugar’ soundtracked breakfast. ‘Golden’ lurked quietly at a London chemist’s. ‘Late Night Talking’ blasted at a Brooklyn bar, leading one man to proclaim, “I like Harry Styles. I can admit it,” like it was a radical act of self-acceptance.

And while he may be everywhere in 2022, Styles is, at the moment, literally right in front of me, sitting in an armchair of a hotel business suite in Hamburg, Germany, on a sweaty June afternoon. After a dip in the Irish Sea this morning, he flew into town and is now enjoying a day off in the middle of his first European tour since 2018.

In person, Styles looks more like your best friend’s cute, sporty older brother than the gender-bending style icon he’s become. He’s left the boas and sequin jumpsuits in the dressing room, opting instead for a blue Adidas track jacket, gym shorts, and Gucci trainers. His hair, often described as “tousled”, like he’s a renegade prince in a romance novel, is clipped back with a hair claw, a signature day-off accessory.

Styles is a kind of millennial anomaly: he plugs his phone in across the room, never once sneaking a glance for a rogue notification. He maintains eye contact as his thoughts unfurl in his often slow drawl. He’s a bit more Zen, even stoic, than he once was; that goofy, class-clown energy he exuded when the world first fell in love with him in One Direction 12 years ago has naturally diminished. But he’s still as affable and charming as ever, remembering details from small talk we had in all the other cities where I had been (professionally) stalking him, and proving earnestly curious about how I was going to spend my time in Hamburg and how magazine deadlines work. (Back in New York, after surprising fans at a Spotify event for his new album, he asked me my thoughts on David Crosby’s most recent album, which he loved.)

“‘As It Was’ is definitely the highest volume of men that I would get stopping me to say something about it”

“My great uncle lives here,” Styles says of Hamburg. “He married a German lady, so I have a German cousin. They always used to come and visit when I was a kid, and the only word in English [the cousin] knew was ‘lemonade’. I didn’t know if she actually wanted lemonade or was trying to say ‘Give me some water, please!’”

Of course it wasn’t meant to take him this long to get back to places like Hamburg, where he’ll play for more than 50,000 fans tomorrow night at Volksparkstadion, a local football stadium. Love on Tour, the name for his current trek, was supposed to launch in the spring of 2020, a few months after Styles released his second album, Fine Line. We all know what happened next.

Styles didn’t get to play live again until last autumn, but something funny happened in the interim. While we were bound to our homes, Styles experienced his first number one hit in Fine Line’s ‘Watermelon Sugar’, a tune so sweet it may take a moment to realise he’s singing about cunnilingus. Less than a year later, he won his first Grammy for it.

When flying became an option, Styles came home to London. Later, he drove down to Italy in his late stepdad’s car with a friend, listening to the jazz CDs left behind. He visited the Trevi Fountain one day, likely wearing his short-lived pandemic moustache, and was greeted with just four other people instead of the usual throngs that surround the historic site: “I felt like every day you’d say, ‘Weird time, isn’t it?’ Then go, ‘Yeah, it’s fucking insane!’”

He credits his stream of roommates — friends, collaborators — with keeping him together during this time. “I really would’ve struggled if I’d done the whole thing by myself,” he says, mirroring the “Harry, you’re no good alone” lyric from ‘As It Was’. After Italy, Styles visited friends in France, then returned to work, eventually posting up at Real World Studios near Bath. By the time he set off across the US to finally tour behind Fine Line last autumn, Harry’s House was secretly finished.

Now, besides the unavoidable singles and the victory-lap world tour, there are other indicators of next-level stardom: his skincare, nail polish and clothing line called Pleasing and a fashion collection with Gucci, not to mention his flourishing movie career. He’s starring in the psychological thriller Don’t Worry Darling and in the intimate drama My Policeman, and he’s nabbed a deal with Marvel Studios to play Eros in at least one of the Eternals films. “Everything in my life has felt like a bonus since X-Factor,” he says, referring to the singing competition that led directly to One Direction. “Get on TV and sing. I never expected and never thought that would happen.”

When Styles played two sold-out shows at Wembley Stadium in June, the first thing he did after stepping offstage each night was take a shower. The post-show shower has become a ritual: a hygienic necessity, sure, but also a crucial moment of clarity and reflection. He washes away the screams full of love and desire to just be in his presence. Anyone would be overwhelmed by that. “It’s really unnatural to stand in front of that many people and have that experience,” he says. “Washing it off, you’re just a naked person, in your most vulnerable, human form. Just like a naked baby, basically.”

Those post-Wembley showers were especially gratifying. When One Direction, which Styles casually refers to as “the band”, played the stadium in 2014, he ended up with tonsillitis on the day of the show. “I was miserable,” he recalls. “We played the first one, and I remember I came off, got in the car, and just started crying because I was so disappointed.”

Styles’s solo shows at Wembley were a reunion of sorts: he had friends and family from all parts of his life and career in the audience on both nights. His mum, Anne Twist, sister Gemma, friends and his team all danced in the stands next to Wilde and her two young children. Even former bandmate Niall Horan swung by, smiling through ‘What Makes You Beautiful’.

As he’s become one of the world’s biggest pop stars, Styles’s need for privacy — for keeping that “naked baby” self out of the public eye — seems to have grown. Secrecy has helped to fend off constant questions about his sex life, the kind that were tossed his way as soon as he was of legal age.

“Everything in my life has felt like a bonus since X-Factor. Get on TV and sing. I never expected and never thought that would happen”

In the past couple of years, he started to go to therapy more routinely. “I committed to doing it once a week,” he explains. “I felt like I exercise every day and take care of my body, so why wouldn’t I do that with my mind?”

Through it, he started to process parts of himself he hadn’t figured out before. “So many of your emotions are so foreign before you start analysing them properly. I like to really lean into [an emotion] and look at it in the face. Not like, ‘I don’t want to feel like this,’ but more like, ‘What is it that makes me feel this way?’”

One feeling he needed to shed was shame, the kind of shame that comes from having your sex life scrutinised while you’re still just trying to make sense of it. Over the years, he learned to stop apologising for it. He learned he could be vulnerable in private while still protecting it from the public.

He’s found a vague balance through compartmentalisation. “I’ve never talked about my life away from work publicly and found that it’s benefited me positively,” he explains, perhaps preemptively. “There’s always going to be a version of a narrative, and I think I just decided I wasn’t going to spend the time trying to correct it or redirect it in some way.”

Drawing the curtain over his life has only made everyone who’s not behind it more curious. His sexuality, for example, has been a topic of near obsession for years. He has embraced gender fluidity in his fashion, like Mick Jagger and David Bowie before him, and has repeatedly pointed out how backward it feels to require labels and boxes for everyone’s identity. Critics of his approach have accused him of “queerbaiting” or profiting off queer aesthetics without explicitly claiming the community. Defenders feel it’s unfair to force anyone to label themselves as one thing in order to validate their gender or creative expression.

Styles, without prompting, points out how silly he finds some of the arguments about how he may identify to be: “Sometimes people say, ‘You’ve only publicly been with women,’ and I don’t think I’ve publicly been with anyone. If someone takes a picture of you with someone, it doesn’t mean you’re choosing to have a public relationship or something.”

Of late, this can be contested. While he is everywhere, so is Olivia Wilde. The pair met on the set of Don’t Worry Darling, which she directed (more on that in a moment), then made a splash when paparazzi snapped them holding hands at his manager and close friend Jeffrey Azoff’s wedding in January 2021.

Wilde and Styles have said little about the relationship, and rumours have filled the space. Anonymous tweeters acted appalled at their age difference (as if a 28-year-old man dating a 38-year-old woman isn’t completely normal) and criticised the director-actor dating dynamic (as if there isn’t a long history of beloved Hollywood couples meeting the same way).

More intense and jarring was a corner of Styles’s fandom that has made fun of Wilde’s dancing or made lengthy Twitter threads and TikTok videos cancelling her for bad or insensitive jokes made a decade ago. If Styles is already held up to a high standard, his potential partners are held to an unreachable one for some of his fans.

Styles is not the most online person — he uses Instagram to look at plants and architecture posts, has never had the TikTok app, and calls Twitter “a shitstorm of people trying to be awful to people” — but he’s still aware of how those small, toxic corners of the internet are treating the people closest to him. “That obviously doesn’t make me feel good,” he says, carefully. It’s a tightrope he’s treading in discussing this. He wants to — and does! — see the good in his fans, but there’s no denying that like every large online community, this one has a faction that runs on hate and anonymity.

Even with the boundaries he’s set between his public and private lives, sometimes “other people blur the lines for you”, he says. There’s a conversation he has to have early in a relationship, no matter how weird or premature it may feel. “Can you imagine,” he says, “going on a second date with someone and being like, ‘OK, there’s this corner of the thing, and they’re going to say this, and it’s going to be really crazy, and they’re going to be really mean, and it’s not real…. But anyway, what do you want to eat?’”

“Everyone, including myself, has your own journey with figuring out sexuality and getting more comfortable with it”

While Styles takes comfort in knowing his whole fandom is not like that, he still wonders about how to respond when the noise gets too loud. “It’s obviously a difficult feeling to feel like being close to me means you’re at the ransom of a corner of Twitter or something,” he says. “I just wanted to sing. I didn’t want to get into it if I was going to hurt people like that.”

When asked about her experience with his fans, Wilde is diplomatic. Like Styles, she believes in what they stand for as a collective, calling them “deeply loving people” who have fostered an accepting community. “What I don’t understand about the cruelty you’re referencing is that that kind of toxic negativity is the antithesis of Harry, and everything he puts out there,” she tells me. “I don’t personally believe the hateful energy defines his fan base at all. The majority of them are true champions of kindness.”

Styles became a leading man when he was four years old, starring in a play called Barney the Church Man. Later, he transformed into Buzz Lightyear in a production of Chitty Chitty Bang Bang “because Buzz Lightyear was in the toy shop for some reason”. His other early theatre credits include: Razamatazz in Bugsy Malone (“the band leader”) and the Elvis-inspired Pharaoh in Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. (He would later audition for Baz Luhrmann’s Elvis, but was deemed too iconic by the director.)

But as Styles was preparing the release of his solo debut in 2017, he took his first foray back into acting, with a supporting role in Christopher Nolan’s war epic, Dunkirk. (The director said he had no idea how famous Styles was when he cast him.) By the time Marvel recruited him to become Eros, director Chloé Zhao had no one else but Styles in mind for the role. Thanos’s more heroic brother is portrayed in the comics as an intergalactic playboy of sorts, with superhuman strength and the ability to control people’s emotions (a fitting role for the planet’s hottest pop star). MCU boss Kevin Feige recently teased more from Styles, though so far, his only appearance has been the Eternals’ post-credits scene, alongside the Patton Oswalt-voiced Pip. “It’d be funny if that was it, wouldn’t it?” he jokes of his cameo.

Styles’s role in Dunkirk grabbed Wilde’s attention as she was beginning to map out Don’t Worry Darling. He was an early contender for the role of Jack, a charming but secretive husband to Florence Pugh’s increasingly troubled Alice. And Styles had plenty of reasons to be interested in Don’t Worry Darling. Wilde’s second feature film as a director reportedly started a bidding war among 18 studios, following the success of her directorial debut, Booksmart.

Pre-pandemic talks between Styles and the Darling team didn’t make it far; he was, after all, due on a global tour for most of 2020. Instead, Shia LaBeouf won the role, but by the end of that summer, Wilde had reportedly booted the actor for poor on-set behaviour.

“I’d wanted to act again,” Styles says. He spent a lot of the pandemic watching movies with his quarantine set of friends and collaborators: he rescreened favourites like the 2012 Belgian drama The Broken Circle Breakdown. Some nights, he and his friends would put a bunch of titles in a hat and choose. (“There was a couple different tastes in the house, so it was between, like, Parasite and Coyote Ugly.”)

Styles was announced as LaBeouf’s replacement a month before filming began. He proved perfect for the role of Jack, who’s brought Alice to the remote, fictional American town of Victory to work on a secret project the men at the company won’t tell their wives about. Jack’s become a star employee and is desperate for his boss’s approval. “We were looking for someone with innate warmth and palpable charm,” Wilde says. “The entire story depended on the audience believing in Jack.”

At the start, he was understandably anxious about taking on such a large role alongside stars like Pugh, Chris Pine, Gemma Chan and Nick Kroll. “In music, there’s such an immediate response to what you do. You finish a song and people clap,” he says. “When you’re filming and they say ‘Cut,’ there’s maybe part of you that expects everyone to start clapping, [but] they don’t. Everyone, obviously, goes back to doing their jobs, and you’re like, ‘Oh, shit, was it that bad?’” (Being an actor reminded him of session musicians: “You get called in to do your bit, and then someone else puts it all together and makes it.”)

The risk may pay off: he and Pugh are already getting awards season buzz. Wilde says one moment “left us all in tears” — Jack’s promotion scene during a big company gala. “It’s a strange scene, full of fascist references, and a disturbing amount of male rage,” Wilde says. “The scene called for him to stand onstage with Frank (Chris Pine) and chant their creepy slogan, ‘Whose world is it? Ours!’ over and over again. Dark as hell. But Harry took it to another level. He was so fully in the moment, he began screaming the lines to the crowd, in this primal roar, that was way more intense than anything we expected from the scene.”

According to Wilde, Pine backed away, understanding this was Harry’s moment. “The camera operator followed him as he paced around the stage like a kind of wild animal,” Wilde remembers. “We were all gobsmacked at the monitor. I think even Harry was surprised by it. Those are the best moments for an actor — when you’re completely outside your body.”

Within weeks, Styles went from the set of Darling to shooting the more intimate My Policeman. He had read the script the year prior, moved by the story enough to have contacted director Michael Grandage and request a meeting. Styles showed up with every line memorised.

Styles plays Tom, a policeman who develops feelings for a museum curator named Patrick (David Dawson). Set in the 50s, when it was still illegal to be in a same-sex relationship in the UK, the pair move in secret while Tom pursues a marriage with a schoolteacher named Marion (Emma Corrin). The film shifts between the past and the present, when the three reunite under dire circumstances. “It’s obviously pretty unfathomable now to think, ‘Oh, you couldn’t be gay. That was illegal,’” Styles says. “I think everyone, including myself, has your own journey with figuring out sexuality and getting more comfortable with it.” To him, My Policeman is a very human story. “It’s not like, ‘This is a gay story about these guys being gay.’ It’s about love and about wasted time to me.”

According to Styles, Grandage wanted to highlight what sex is really like between two men in the scenes between Tom and Patrick. “So much of gay sex in film is two guys going at it, and it kind of removes the tenderness from it,” Styles continues. “There will be, I would imagine, some people who watch it who were very much alive during this time when it was illegal to be gay, and [Michael] wanted to show that it’s tender and loving and sensitive.”

Darling and Policeman make their big premieres at prestigious film festivals in Venice and Toronto late this summer, but Styles isn’t sure his pivot to the silver screen will be permanent. “I don’t imagine I’d do a movie for a while,” he says. There are rumours about how many Marvel movies he’s signed on for and other franchises he might be secretly in talks to do. (In response to a rumour he’ll be starring in a future Star Wars series, he says, “That’s the first I’ve heard of that. I’d imagine… false.”)

Like a true tousled-haired prince, Styles invites me to attend a concert with him by the philharmonic in Hamburg, eight hours before his own show.

On past tours, he says, “I was getting to a lot of cities and feeling like ‘I’ve been here six times and I’ve never seen any of it.’” This tour, he’s been taking in a lot of architecture. “It’s something I can do on my own, just sit somewhere and look at stuff,” he says.

Studying the finer points of buildings fits the regimented, disciplined and distinctly grown-up tour life he’s created. Styles has found himself enamoured with routine on the road: 10 hours of sleep a night, IV injections pumping him with nutrients and vitamins, a strict acid-reflux-conscious diet that cuts out coffee, alcohol and certain foods that affect the throat 50,000 fans are depending on. Last night, he slept with two humidifiers that apparently made it look like he was stepping out of a steam room when he opened his hotel room door.

The Elbphilharmonie Hamburg — “Elphi” for short — is a striking structure, looking something like a gorgeous sail. Styles is wearing the same outfit as when I met him in the hotel the day before, only with shorts swapped out for pinstripe pants and a surgical mask covering his face. He and I are both late and can’t be let into the show until intermission, so instead we comb through the backstage hallways and elevators to see rooms built for incredible acoustics and sweeping views of Hamburg. He marvels at all of it. In a temperature controlled room full of pianos, he asks our tour guide which is the best (“Is there a shining star?”) before sitting down at one and playing for a couple of dreamy, Beatlesque minutes. (He’d mentioned earlier that he spent last summer playing piano every day with his morning coffee.) He has questions about panelling. And like a true tourist, he takes pictures of everything.

The first time I ever met Styles was a lot like this. On his first headlining tour, in San Francisco in 2017, I went backstage to interview Kid Harpoon. Styles stumbled into the room where I was waiting, strolling around less like a headliner with fans lined up around the block and more like the lighting guy. Here was someone who is inexplicably difficult to casually enjoy (you watch one video of One Direction’s funniest interview moments on YouTube and suddenly you’re contemplating how many of their cardboard cutouts you can fit in your dorm) acting so casually. He greeted me then like an old friend, not someone who was still refusing to let go of a One Direction keychain at the time. He asked me how I had been, what I was up to in San Francisco, and if I was excited for the show. Of course I remember every second of it.

Styles has a gift for making those in his presence feel seen. Just ask fans who bump into him on walks through Central Park or Hampstead Heath, then detail those moments as if they had met the pope (granted, the pope could never pull off a hair claw).

Before the second half of the concert at the Elphi, the crowd mingles and grabs drinks. As we walk through, Styles goes unnoticed. (The mask helps.) It’s funny to watch one of the world’s biggest pop stars move through space with such ease, as if he’s blissfully unaware of how well-known he is.

“If you make your life about the fact that you can’t go anywhere and everything has to be a big deal, then that’s what your life becomes,” he says. “Now, in London, I walk everywhere. It’s hard to stumble across things and restaurants and places and stuff if you’re just driving everywhere, and it’s just not that fun.”

Styles outlines his upcoming months for me: in August, after he wraps his European tour in Lisbon, he’ll go on holiday with some friends, maybe catch up on the Love Island season he was “gutted” to miss, or see if The Bear is as good as everyone tells him it is. The next leg of his tour includes stops in LA, New York, Austin and Chicago as extended residencies, a decision that meets his personal need for a less strenuous touring schedule and a professional need to be able to attend film festivals and rent studios to write and record music for his fourth album. “I’m always writing,” he says. He and his collaborators are already throwing around ideas. “I think all of us are so excited to get back to it, which feels insane because we’ve just put an album out.”

“What I value the most from my friends is I’m reminded that it’s OK to be flawed. I’m pretty messy and make mistakes sometimes”

More than ever, he is thinking about the future. He wants to take meaningful time off at some point — from touring at least, he’s always writing — and ensure he’s a more present figure for his family and friends. In turn, he’s learned to define what real love looks like to him. “The fantasy, or the vision, or the version of you that people can build you up to be feels like a person that isn’t flawed,” he explains. “What I value the most from my friends is I feel like I’m constantly reminded that it’s OK to be flawed. I think I’m pretty messy and make mistakes sometimes. I think that’s the most loving thing: you can see someone’s imperfections, and it’s not [that you] love them in spite of that, but it’s [that you] love them with that.”

He’s thinking about what he wants to say, too. Styles admits he was uninterested in politics as a teenager, oblivious to things that didn’t personally affect him. But as he grew more famous, he worried about that, too. “I took a massive look at myself,” he says, “and was like, ‘Oh, I don’t do enough… or anything.” When conversations around anti-Blackness and inaction reached a fever pitch in 2020, Styles marched in the streets and read books like How to Be an Antiracist, by Ibram X. Kendi, and The Will to Change, by bell hooks. He started thinking about racial and gender equity, especially as someone who employs many people on the road. “Pretending as a white person you don’t get a head start just isn’t true,” he says.

We were hanging out right after Roe v. Wade had been overturned in America. “I can’t begin to imagine how terrifying it is to be a woman in America at the moment,” he says. He’ll grab a fan’s sign that reads “My Body, My Choice” at the Hamburg show, displaying it proudly onstage. There’s an energy in the crowds that fills him with careful optimism. “I feel lucky to see a group of people, even just on this tour, who come together in a way,” he says. “I think that group of people is so much less afraid of opening the wound, talking about it, and doing the work, than the generation before us.”

As we wait for the philharmonic’s packed show to restart, I notice a few young girls with their families in the audience and ask Styles what he thinks the crossover between this crowd and his show tonight will be. He looks around at the mostly older faces and goes, “Less than one per cent… I know I’ll be at both.”

Styles watches the orchestra studiously. When the conductor leaves and then returns to a standing ovation, Styles whispers, “He’s about to play his big hit.” Even when he’s not peacocking in front of 50,000, he’s still trying to entertain the one person he’s with.

We walk out before the crowd fully disperses. Styles lingers a second to take some photos of the room before he heads out to get ready for his concert, where he’ll bounce around the stage, lifted by the wails of young fans who have been waiting years for this moment.

His fans will linger tonight, too, crowding in the hundreds outside Volksparkstadion. They’ll take photos of their outfits, their tear- and sweat-stained glittery faces, the piles of abandoned boa feathers. They’ll play his big hits back to him, holding a phone light vigil as they sing One Direction’s ‘Night Changes’ or the Fine Line ballad ‘Falling’. As the city echoes as much of him as it can take, he’ll probably be washing it all away.

#harry styles #harry update #rolling stone #article #august 2022

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james-sunshine-potter · 11 months

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when i get home, i'm going to bury you...

READ ON AO3 (pretty please :*)

TW/ Vomitting, Death (we don’t see it happen), blood and morgues, smoking, driving under influence (it’s not someone we see or know)

James doesn’t think this could get any worse if he tried.

Like he isn’t even sure how it got to be like this.

It was meant to be a party for Evan’s 19th birthday. A house party which was meant to be a plain excuse to get wasted for a night and regret it in the morning.

James had been a part of the planning due to his (secret albeit) involvement with this friendship group, through Regulus. Mainly due to the fact he had money and a car to drive around town to collect party supplies. But also, regulus wanted him there… and who was he to say no to him?

Him and Regulus had been… a thing for a while now. It was official, absolutely. They had both confirmed it to each other, they were dating and theirs only. He thinks Regulus might be too jealous to anything but commitment, which James isn’t complaining about. The thing was not many people new. Regulus’ friend found out through an unfortunate accident (they weren’t even doing anything that explicit… they actually just missed it…), Barty doesn’t know what a secret means and suddenly Evan, Dorcas and Pandora knew. And because Dorcas knew, Marlene knew.

But for James and Regulus’ luck, Marlene wasn’t big enough to ignore a bribe (money… £120 to be exact, he paid for a tattoo and piercing), so the secret stopped spreading there.

The point was James had been dating Regulus for almost five months now, and Sirius had no idea. It wasn’t like James was never going to tell him, he was just waiting for the right time. He just doesn’t know when the right time was to tell Sirius he’s dating his little brother who he has a complicated relationship which James knew about. He couldn’t see that going well.

Especially since James was the person to properly start it. He started the flirting, the chase (he wasn’t being chased though) and he was the person who asked Regulus out for the first date. Everything else just happened, Regulus made sure nothing was accidental. Regulus was the one to want to keep in private at first, James would do anything regulus asked him to. He loved the privacy, and the intimacy which came with it. Every kiss was just for them, everything which happened behind closed doors was just for them. There were no expectations, no pressure. No one knew about what was happening with them. Regulus is so private that the people who do know barely know anything.

James is almost surprised it lasted this long. He isn’t complaining though. He can’t think of a time where he felt happier. Where he felt more loved.

It wasn’t hard keeping it from Sirius. Every hickey he had was from a one-night stand Sirius didn’t know about. All the flowers? From parents, Sirius never questioned that. Why would he? Love letters? Never seen, completely hidden to begin with. Days busy? Busy at the gym… or at work… or with family… or colleges at work are doing something afterwork and he was invited. He had an answer for everything. Every I was dotted and t’s crossed. Nothing was forgotten or left behind. Plus, Sirius is too oblivious to actually notice any true connection.

That’s how five months were able to happen before they found out.

And how did they find out? Because Barty doesn’t know what the word ‘secret’ means.

Barty who was drunk and probably high, with what James knew was circling the party, spilled the beans to an equally as intoxicated Sirius about how cute James and Regulus are as a couple.

And now they are here. Sirius has been screaming at James for so long, James is no longer tipsy like he was before. Thankfully, with how many people was at this party, the sheer quantity of alcohol and the volume of the music, not many people were aware of what was going on. Only the people watching.

“I can’t fucking believe you’d do this to me,” Sirius cursed for the fourth time, “My little brother, you’ve been fucking my little brother and you were dumb enough to think I wouldn’t care or find out…. How could you be that dumb James?!”

“What do you think happened, Sirius? He dumbly tripped and fell onto my dick; we are our own people!” Regulus snaps back, who has the ability to mindlessly argue with Sirius for hours.

“NO!” They roar, “I think James has jack shit going on in his head since he thought this was ever a good idea in the first place,” The slur to their words being drowned out by Lady Gaga from the other side of the wall.

“Sirius… there’s no need to be rude, you’ve even noticed that Regulus has been happier in the past months, this could be seen as a good thing,” Remus pulled Sirius back by the shoulder, trying to stop this, even though it doesn’t. Clearly already done with this.

James is too. In the twenty minutes of conversation, he’s barely got one word in. Sirius won’t shut up. James knew he was mad… maybe it’s this bad because they’re drunk. Sirius always picked fights drunk.

“I don’t care about being rude, I care about trust! How could betray me like this?”

“Oh my God Sirius, I didn’t do anything to you!” James snapped, sick of Sirius’ shit, “I don’t have some weird sick vendetta against you where I’d use your brother, and no this isn’t some sick joke, and no this isn’t some situationship which I’ll break off coldly once I get bored and no, I’m not dating your brother to make fun of him, which you so kindly think I would,”

James runs a hand through his hair, “I’m dating Regulus because I love him, and I love spending time with him… or I don’t know, he’s his own being and not your possession you give out like a toy,”

Sirius just scoffs, “I know I don’t possess him, but what I don’t like is keeping it from me in the first place and now rubbing it in my face,”

“Firstly, I was the person who didn’t want to tell you for so long, so if you’re going to be mad at someone for that, be mad at me… and secondly, we aren’t rubbing it in your face,” Regulus said with an impressive amount of patience, “If anything, you are… we’ve been begging you to shut up about it for 20 minutes now, I just want to enjoy this party, so does James… and Remus… and Peter, and surely you…”

Sirius has a disgusted look on their face, if James wasn’t so over this, he’d laugh, “Why didn’t you tell Remus, huh? Or Peter? Marlene knew, Dorcas knew, Barty, Evan and Pandora knew… what makes them so special?” Sirius turned around to try and get Remus and Peter involved but it was clear to everyone but them, that Sirius was fighting a losing battle.

“Pads, going to be real, I couldn’t give two shits who James shags, I thought I made that obvious,” Peter said bluntly before straight up leaving the conversation, walking back into the party.

“Yeah babe… they’re being safe, they’re happy and also, they haven’t been making me deal with any mess, I don’t care… I don’t think this is worth the energy you’re giving it,” Remus said calm and cooly, rubbing a caring hand down Sirius’ arm.

It doesn’t work, as they quick turn back to Regulus to have a sparing over who James belongs to and the betrayal of it all. James quickly focused on finding his own out.

Which came quickly. As if God heard his prayers.

It came in the form of a phone call. He always kept his phone on vibrate, because he’s just anxious if he didn’t. So due to his phone anxiety, he’s able to feel his phone vibrate in his back pocket as he starts to zone out from the conversation entirely.

He pulls his phone out to find ‘PRIVATE NUMBER’ displayed on the screen in bold letters.

Now, this could be a scam call about an alleged, albeit fake car accident he was in or an amazing out.

He takes his get of jail card.

“I’ve got to take this,” He abruptly says, bolting as he turns to leave Evan’s place, leaving the door open behind him.

He vaguely hears ‘YOU CAN’T GET OUT THIS THAT EASY JAMES, GET BACK HERE!’ but he ignores it by walking further down the street and answering the phone.

“Hello?”

“Hello, is this James Fleamont potter?” A serious voice come from over the phone. This couldn’t be a scam call cause otherwise how would they know his full name? Middle name included? “Yes, it is… who’s this?” James answered cautiously, slowing his steps.

“My name is Grace Taylor, and I’m calling from St. Mungo’s Hospital…” There’s a pause from the other side of the phone, it isn’t long, but it doesn’t make James feel good, “It says on my records on my records that you are an emergency contact for Fleamont and Euphemia Potter, is that true?”

“I am… yes,” A pit forms in James’ throat as he continues to walk down the street. He isn’t first on the emergency contact list for either his parents, rather the second behind each other for respective parent. If he’s getting asked for both, this can’t equal anything good.

“I’m sorry to inform you but there has been an accident involving Fleamont and Euphemia Potter,”

James stops dead in his tracks, completely unaware of where he was. Not caring if Sirius followed, or even caught up. He can hear them walking up the street.

“Sorry? An accident? What do you mean an accident? Are they okay? What’s… what’s happened?” James barely lets out a whisper.

“I’m sorry to say no, it was a car accident… we need you to come to hospital as soon as possible… to identify their bodies…” He’s sure she is still talking but there’s absolutely nothing going into his head. Car accident? His parents never drive, his mum doesn’t even have a licence. His dad has a car but doesn’t even take it out the garage half the time. They need to identify… he can barely think it. Bodies means dead. He wouldn’t need identify people, people with ids and records and the ability to confirm their own identity, but bodies mangled beyond recognition…

Fuck he’s going to be sick.

“James… you still there?” he manages to hear.

“Yeah… I’m coming now where… where do I need to go?” he can barely breathe.

“If you come to the accident and emergency entrance, you’ll find me and I’ll help you from there, I’m sorry about this, drive safe,”

James drops his phone as she hangs up. He can’t breathe, he can’t think, he can’t move.

This can’t be happening, it really can’t be happening, surely this isn’t actually happening, surely this seriously-

“If you think you could fake a phone call to get away from me, you’re even dumber I thought James!” Sirius starts on again. James doesn’t even turn to face them.

James doesn’t even answer.

“Oh, you’re a child now, not even going to give me answer… not going to look at me?” Sirius is being mean for the sake of picking a fight. They don’t even sound real, their words twisted and echoing through James’ head.

The only thought in his is ‘your parents are dead, mum’s dead, dad’s dead, they’re dead, they’re dead, mum and dad are dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, DEAD - ‘

James feels Sirius step closer to him. He doesn’t react.

“Real fucking mature James,” Sirius pushes James as they drunkenly speak.

And that… that does it. That tips James over the edge, as with no warning to anyone but him, he leans over himself, placing shaking hands onto even shakier thighs and vomits onto the pavement.

There’s a wave of reaction, none of them good but that doesn’t stop James from going again.

And again.

And again. Until there’s nothing left inside him, until he’s doing a weird mix of dry heaving and coughing. He doesn’t stand back though.

“Shit James, are you okay?” Regulus is suddenly by his side, magically. Adding to the stars he’s seeing. Placing strong hands-on weak arms, crouching down so he can meet James’ eyes.

“Hospital…” Is all that he manages out around the taste of vomit and poorly timed coughs.

“Hospital? What do you mean?” Regulus parrots back, understandably confused.

“Called… it was the hospital… I need to go to the hospital… now” James says, spaced out and feeling a little lost, as he stands up. Regulus catching him as he sways.

“You need to go to the hospital? Are you feeling sick?” Regulus immediately sounds terrified.

“No… parents there… hospital called…”

And really, that’s all he really had to say for Regulus to click. James, even in this spaced-out space, can see it click.

“Okay… okay I’m coming with you, Remus can you go back in and get him his keys and some water?” Regulus told Remus, leaving no room for arguments. Remus left without saying anything.

“Uhm you aren’t going to go with him Regulus,” Sirius says, dumbly thinking it’s a good time to speak, “If anyone should go with him it’s- “

He gets cut off by a sharp slap to the face. If James was more with it, he would reacted let alone cared. But he wasn’t, so he just watched.

“You have done more than enough tonight, you aren’t going anywhere with him,”

Regulus takes James’ hand and pulls him away.

James just follow.

-•-

James is sitting in some chair, in some corridor of some part of St. Mungo’s Hospital waiting for some mortician.

Turns out, the accident was worse than bad. It was horrible. Friday night was always their date night, they never missed it. They had gone to a new restaurant in London which a friend had recommended. They were taking a taxi back to the station when the taxi ran a red light, which caused a bus to crash into the back of the taxi.

They weren’t ones driving, but they were the ones killed.

The taxi driver they had was apparently high behind the wheel. If James hadn’t already thrown up everything previously, he would have again. What made it so much worse was that the driver wasn’t even hurt. Not a single scratch on his body. James could kill him. If he ever saw him, he could him for killing his parents. He’s not proud of it, but he could. He hopes the taxi drivers rots in prison.

He was just waiting for the mortician to come collect him, so he can do what he came here to do.

Regulus is sitting next to him, never have letting go of his hand. He sits there silent, like a saint. James worships him like he is one.

“I can’t remember when I spoke to them last,” James whispered. The silence is thick, it’s killing him. He needs to break it, by whatever means how.

“Sorry?” Regulus whispered back, obviously shocked by what James had said.

“I always call my mum on a Wednesday, we’ll talk for an hour about something… literally anything… then she’ll pass me over to dad, and we’ll talk money and work…” James paused and looked into Regulus’ eyes. His eyes could solve a million of James’ problems, and yet they couldn’t even scratch the surface on this one.

“I can’t remember if I called them or not,” James admitted, guilt in every word.

“I know you did… I walked in on it,” Regulus whispered, pressing a hot kiss onto James’ cheek. Sparking a small smile to bloom on James’ face.

“I’m not going to leave your side, you know that. I’ll be there with you the entire time… I’ll enter holding your hand and leave doing the same you understand?”

James nods, his eyes suddenly feeling wet. Regulus just kisses him.

They sit in silence for not much longer when mortician comes out, a man in a uniform behind him follows like a shadow, to conduct this. It was a borderline fight to let Regulus come in with him, something to do with him ‘not being an emergency number’ and ‘not being family with the victims’, but it ends with James refusing to do anything without him there.

Regulus comes in and stands by two lumps on metal tables face them. The morgue feels much worse than he could have ever prepared for. Drawers which hold bodies line the walls, there are supplies and knifes lining the walls. Everything feels so… dead. The lighting feels sickly. There’s no life, no pulse. It smells of antibac, sterile. Like the dead people never lived to begin with.

“Just tell me when you’re ready… just take your time,” the mortician says, clearly detached by the idea of having to identify bodies.

James just stands there and breathes, even though it feels like it isn’t getting there. He can’t feel anything, which he should care about, but he doesn't. He just doesn't. He can feel Regulus’ hand, but he can’t feel the warmth that comes with it. He can feel the softest touch of Regulus wrapping an arm around his waist, but he doesn't feel the support like he usually does.

He could stand here and avoid the inevitable until they decompose. He kind of wants too. Denial is the easiest way to live life. Something his dad would parrot on about on their weekly phone calls. ‘Just because you can avoid something, doesn’t you should… it doesn’t go away, it just comes back harder’.

He takes a deep breath, grips Regulus’ hand to the point he might break it and bites the bullet.

The mortician pulls back the cloth and his hand comes up to his mouth in a feeble attempt to muffle the sob that comes in result. He could cry a river at this point.

He confirms the identity, which triggers the officer to leave, along with the mortician leaving with a comment with giving them some space.

They’re barely recognizable, James only recognised through their wedding rings. Scratched and worn and loved. Shiny silver gone dull, chips in the once sparkling sapphire, chipped and bloody. His dad had it custom made for her, as it was her birthstone. He did it before he even had the money to actually afford it. He sold a watch and his car for it. He told him that story every wedding anniversary like he’d forget. They never took them off. No matter what.

Fifty years together, and they died together. They loved and died by each other’s side.

There’s poetry in that somewhere.

He let goes off Regulus’ hand and walks closer to them. And he just stands there. He doesn’t do anything. He wants to touch them. Hold their hand, move the hair out of their face, something. But he thinks his heart might stop if he does.

But there is one thing he wants to do.

“Could… could you get their wedding bands?” James whispered, gentle with his words, “I don’t want them to get lost…” Regulus does it without saying a word. He’s gentle as he lifts dead hands and slides rings off with ease, putting extra care not to touch anything he shouldn’t. He hands the rings to James and places his arm back where it was.

A part of James wants Regulus to leave, the stronger part of him thinks it might kill him. Lay bloody and dead with his parents. Bury himself six feet underground.

They stand there for what feels like hours, and Regulus doesn’t hesitate once. He hugs him when he breaks down, he whispers reassuring words that no matter what happens, he will not leave James’ side, even means getting into more fights with Sirius. That no matter what happens, he isn’t alone. And all James can think is he’s so thankful for a five-month secret relationship.

So when it's time to leave, James lets Regulus take him home.

James just follows.

-•-

It rained throughout the entire service and wake. It doesn’t stop James leaving halfway through for a smoke.

One of his mum’s friends from school, Minerva McGonagall, spoke the eulogy. It was a lovely speech.

The wake was at their home, James didn’t really have the energy to have it anywhere else.

He stepped out after half an hour, sick and overwhelmed of crowds and conversations and the overwhelming feeling of death. He hadn’t been back home in a while, too busy with work and university for it. It was something he’d say he would pop down at the weekend, surprise them with some flowers and an apology for not seeing them sooner and letting his mum be clingy with care until he went home the next day. Nothing in the house changed. His dad kept his golf clubs the same place, his mum read the same gardening magazines, the same photos of James lined the same wallpapered walls. 20 years of this house and it feels the exact same. He's just thankful he made some effort the week before, otherwise he didn’t know what he’d do. He took them to his favourite pub by the beach and paid. He would never be able to do that again.

He stood at the end of their drive, just letting the summer rain soak him through as he enjoyed the silence. No one is pestering him here, giving repetitive condolences and well wishes. He had tried on multiple occasions to step out, but someone always stopped him. Everyone thought he wouldn’t want a second alone for himself at his own parents’ wake.

And apparently, even now, standing the pouring rain, he won’t get the time he wants. As he hears the front door open, a quick blast of chatter getting loud before going muffled again.

He just wants to finish his cigarette in peace.

He turns around to see Sirius waltzing out with an umbrella which certainly isn’t his; it’s his dad’s golf umbrella.

“I’ve been looking for you for like half an hour…” Sirius puffed as he stood next to James.

“Well, you’ve found me,” he says before taking a drag from his cigarette.

“Mind if I pinch one?” Sirius asks, as he covers James with the umbrella.

James puffs out a cloud of smoke before pulling out his packet, and Sirius takes one. Lighting it with their own lighter.

They stand in silence as they smoke. He can only begin to imagine the lecture his mum would give him if she ever found out that he smokes. They never knew he smoked, either of them. He would have definitely found out if they did.

“I… I’m sorry,” Sirius says as James puts out his cigarette.

“Unless you’re about to reveal you secretly drive taxis, I’m not too sure what you’re apologizing for, mate,” James said kind of dryly, not really that interested in having a conversation.

“Well, lucky for you, or me, I don’t… my reaction to you dating Reg,” and fuck, James almost forgot about all that, he’s had some much to do that it completely slipped his mind till now, “I was rude, too rude… as much I’m not thrilled about the idea of you shagging my little brother, the stuff said stuff which was uncalled for,”.

“Am I hearing you admit that you were wrong?” James jabbed.

“Don’t expect to hear it ever again… it’s just…” Sirius sighs as they put out their cigarette on the wall next to James, “I guess in my head, all you two were doing was screwing, which never ends well…” Sirius turns to actually face James. James returns the favour.

“But it’s clear that you two really care for each other, I mean I’ve watched Regulus show you care and patience I wasn’t even aware he was able of doing,” Sirius commented.

“If you’re about to give me the big brother protective talk, save it for a day when it isn’t my parents wake,”

Sirius takes a deep breath, “Did they know? Effie and Monty?”

“No… well I never told them, but they also know, so I like to think they did,”

“You’re a good person James, I have no reason not to trust you, especially if my brother does,”

As if he knew he was being talked about, Regulus came out, ready to complain about James being soaking wet cause of the rain. Stuff about colds and ruined suits and ‘how dare you worry me like that! I thought you had down a runner!’.

James just kissed the saint that is Regulus Black and lead him inside.

James just followed.

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asydicsydney · 1 year

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I was just remembering how Carlos said he could catch Cecil's broadcasts in the Desert Otherworld, but that they were sometimes from the past or future.

Anyway here's a very inaccurate fic I just cranked out with that premise.

I haven't eaten or drunk anything in days. Although I'm not sure I need to anymore, really. I also haven't heard his voice in days. I was so accustomed to slacking on work when his show came on, punishing myself for it later on with all the all nighters, such a welcome escape from reality while I assured my team I was simply using my resources wisely for finding new issues around town. His voice could slip into the air around me and dig out my deepest secrets. A prize only for him, but one of which he knew nothing of. Even after a year of dating and moving in with each other, you can't know someone's deepest secrets. It would take a lifetime to know someone that well. And we would never get a lifetime, all because I went through that stupid door. Carlos, 'the man who can't stop sciencing even during a capitalistic uprising'. My team definitely owes me those 5$.

I've managed to find a wire hanger sticking out of a cactus. I bent it into an antenna-like shape and stuck it in the top of my phone. I couldn't do any damage to it anyway, maybe I could do some good, find a signal.

Yes! Oh, sweet radio waves, how I missed you! Now, if I go to my NVCR app I might catch him on the air... Unless it's his lunch break, or the weather, or it's 2AM and he's pretending to sleep. Oh, I forgot to turn my volume up.

"-has a square jaw, and teeth like a military cemetery. His hair is perfect, and we all hate, and despair, and love that perfect hair in equal measure."

Is he waxing poetic about me again? Eh, at least he still thinks of me.

"-had come to study just what is going on around here. He grinned, and everything about him was perfect, and I fell in love instantly."

Aww, he sounds exactly the same as when...

He sounds exactly the same...

Did I just go back in time?

No no no no no, this must not be tuned right, I'll just-

"And here I remind you that he became trapped there while saving our city from treacherous, dark forces. I remind you he is a hero. I remind you that my boyfriend is-"

Wait! No no, go back! That sounded like the right frequency... Where are we now?

"-and Carlos. I'm proud to call you family."

Steve? Family?

"I said once that a home is just a group of objects connected by a shared personal experience of time. Which was just a fancy way of asking you to move in with me. And it worked."

Now I'm talking? Am I talking to Cecil? Where on the timeline is this?

"In other words, changing the story about you or the story about me into a story about us."

I- what? I'll-I'll just sit down for awhile and listen. Not like an oak door will just show up anyway.

"And now, tonight, I say I'm glad again, for this decision and all the decisions that will come every day after. Which is to say-"

Is this really?

"I just thought that it was time for us to make a life together."

Us? Did.. we? R-really? And of course it's on air. Oh, Cecil, babe! We did it! Wait, that means-

"-knowing that Carlos was there, that no matter what else happened we would come back to each other-"

I made it home.

"I know nowhere friendlier. I know nowhere hotter. The moon is still beautiful, mysterious lights still pass overhead."

I really made it home.

"Stay tuned next for a drunk, newly married couple, long after all the well-wishers have left, pilling up bags of garbage-"

I'm gonna make it, Cecil.

"And good night, Night Vale, and every person who can hear my voice. Good night."

I'll make it home on time. I promise.

#wtnv #cecilos #carlos the scientist #desert otherworld #wtnv fanfic

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strangerthanjonathan · 2 years

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Noah Schnapp saying Volume 2 will have ‘deaths’, meaning more than one... fills me with visceral fear. Saying that, here are the people I think are most likely to die based upon how many people are suggesting it and how it will affect other characters. We want character deaths that hold weight, and I think they’ll really go for that.

Just some fun speculation

1. Eddie.

We’ve all seen discussions on how his entire narrative is set up to reflect him eventually sacrificing himself in an attempt to prove himself no longer a coward. He’s new, and though he’s quickly becoming a fan favorite, the season has already been written and filmed so they cannot rectify it and keep him around. Not to mention, it would be easy to scapegoat him. The town is chasing him down like he’s Freddie Krueger, ultimately it would be hard to rectify and far too complicated for a brand-new character.

2. Jonathan

Now all you Jonathan lovers please know that I am a Jonathan stan and if this happens I can and will lose my ever-loving shit. It will be the Magicians Debacle 2.0 for me. However, setting up Stancy a second time around could allow Steve and Robin to be there for Nancy in the case that Jonathan dies. This, his sudden distancing from Nancy causing a slight rift in their relationship, plus his repeated and deliberate shove to the side in the past three seasons just seems like they’ve been burying his character for a while. While it won’t harm the main plot, it would still be devastating to most of the characters, specifically Will, Joyce, and Nancy.

3. Murray

I don’t think this would be an impactful death for most everyone, but if we’re getting multiple deaths then it could be in there. It just makes sense to me; dude is a bit of a loose end in my opinion. Seems like he’d die, and it’d really break Joyce’s heart and we’d get to see Winona act the shit out of that concept. Just makes sense.

4. Mike

This one might seem crazy, but I think it’s just crazy enough that it makes sense. This would affect multiple layers of the narrative, as pretty much everyone is kind of at least a little bit tied into Mike. It would devastate Eleven, Will, and Nancy. But it will also affect pretty much all of the other characters. An impactful death, and one that just makes sense in my head for some reason.

5. Erica

Now I love Erica, and it seems that despite her antagonistic relationship with many of the characters, everyone also cares about her. I think it would just be ultimately devastating to have such a young kid die.

6. Steve

A lot of people have been suggesting this one. I understand the fear, but I genuinely doubt they would do this. Now if it came down to the final season, I would say all bets are off. But killing Steve off at this point would be dangerous, a lot of people would stop watching. This is one that I personally believe is safe despite other people’s insistence he’s not.

7. Nancy

This one, in my opinion, also makes sense. It would drive everyone further into despair and dedication to the cause. Mike, the kids, Jonathan, Steve, even Robin and Eddie would be impacted by this death at this point. But considering we had a scare already in Volume 1 and we know that she survives said scare from promos for Volume 2, I doubt it will happen.

8. Max

This is another one I’ve seen people fear, and as much as I understand the fear and wouldn’t count it out, I just have a feeling it won’t happen. We’re all worried about her dying, it feels purposeful. If we’re worried about Max and Nancy, it’s way easier to blindside us with a random out of the blue death for one of the others.

9. Dustin

It’s an out of the blue and devastating death, one that would affect every single person in the show basically. However, for some reason I’m hesitant to believe it’ll actually happen.

10. Lucas

Killing off Lucas doesn’t make sense to me. Though it would affect a lot of the characters, we’ve been seeing a lot of Max’s grief this season and giving her more of it so soon just doesn’t make sense. I’m predicting eventual alive and well Lumax.

11. Will

If Will dies, likely I will join Joyce and Jonathan in horrific despair. I don’t think this will happen, I do think he’s going to get outed by Vecna but that’s a whole other thing. We’ll have a scare, but I think it’ll just further the plot.

12. Robin

I think this is the least likely death. And I think if the Duffer Brothers kill Robin, it’ll be a big mistake. Yes it would affect some people, but it’s just not conducive to furthering the narrative of everyone. It’s just another pointless death and I think that’s cheap.

13. Argyle

I just think this one would be cheap and meaningless. But also fuck anyone who looks at this man funny, I’ll kill you.

14. Joyce

Don’t.

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tatedeco · 1 year

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My recs for Nightwing!Dick-comics

This is the real meat of it when it comes to Dick Grayson-recs. Most of his modern stories have been as Nightwing ever since he took on that mantle in 1984. You will hear different recs from different people but these are the stories I personally enjoyed the most. Strap in because this is a long list:

Nightwing's Solo Title

These are the stories I liked the most from his solo title. If you want to read Nightwing as a main character, these are the stories I can recommend:

1. Nightwing: Rebirth by Tim Seeley (2016-2017)

Recommendable? Yes, perfect for newcomers. This very much feels like it brings Nightwing back to his roots. You can't go wrong with this as your first Nightwing-comic.

What is it?

It's Dick going back to being Nightwing (he was a secret spy before but don't worry about it). He goes back to his city Blüdhaven and re-establishes himself there.

What do I like about it?

This just captures why Dick is such a beloved character for me. It includes the fun of reading him but also his grit and need to be independent. He very much makes Blüdhaven his own. Blüdhaven is a delightful setting here. Seeley reimagines it as a former whaling town that tries to reimagine itself as a neon-lit casino city. It's a flashy underdog city that fits Nightwing.

This run has one of my all time favorite romances for Dick with Shawn Tsang (a former low-tier villain) and it introduces one of my favorite DC villains Raptor. Giving Dick a villain who is connected to his mom and his circus days is brilliant in my eyes.

2. Nightwing The Untouchable by Sam Humphries (2017-2018)

Recommendable? Yes, one of the best Nightwing-arcs ever. A short read that is collected in one volume. This follows Seeley's arc directly so you could just read this once you've finished the Seeley-issues.

What is it?

It's a story arc where Nightwing fights a new villain The Judge. This villain is very much connected to Blüdhaven, the sea and Dick's past.

What do I like about it?

Sam Humphries filled in on Nightwing directly after Seeley left but he gave us one of the best Nightwing arcs ever. I love how this arc draws on Dick's past and the Blüdhaven-setting to create a new villain. The Judge feels very mythological and the story is well-told over a short time. Humphries did so much with so little. I'd love to see him come back to Nightwing for a longer run.

3. Nightwing by Tom Taylor & Bruno Redondo (2021-now)

Recommendable? Yes, also for newcomers. It's currently going on so you would be very up-to-date with where Dick is now.

What is it?

Dick's return to form after his amnesia (don't ask, you don't need to know). He is heroing in Blüdhaven again and trying to change his community through his newly-acquired wealth He inherits a lot of money from Alfred who's been dead for a few years (but will hopefully return soon).

What do I like about it?

This entire run is just pure positive vibes. I feel like it very much captures Nightwing's positivity and empathy. Fans of Dick/Barbara will also have a good time here because Babs is featured heavily. The plot moves very slowly - which makes this run a bit controversial among many fans - but if you're here for the vibes and the slice-of-life, you'll have a good time. There are also many team-ups, especially with Babs, Tim and Wally.

The art is also to die for. Bruno Redondo is just perfect for Nightwing. There is an entire issue that is one continuous chase-scene and it's one of the most impressive Nightwing-issues ever. Every Nightwing-fan should at least pick up Nightwing #87 for this reason. It's a masterpiece of comic artistry.

4. Nightwing by Peter J. Tomasi (2006-2009)

Recommendable? Yes, a very self-contained run that shows how connected Dick is to the DC universe. Dick is very competent but also fun here. It's all collected in one book.

What is it?

This run has Nightwing move to New York and have adventures there. He is very connected to the DC-universe and there are some cameos and team-ups. Superman shows up at one point, Wally, the Justice Society, Tim Drake... Our boy is beloved.

What do I like about it?

You very much feel how integrated Dick is in the superhero-community. At the same time, he is very independent and competent. There is an especially epic fight here that I won't spoil. You have to love a run that starts with Dick jumping out of a plane for fun and Bruce giving him the disappointed DadTM-vibes.

Nightwing with the Titans

These are the stories where Nightwing is part of the Titans. Either he is the lead for an arc or he gets some great character moments within the team. I also threw a team-up with Wally in here for fun:

5. The Judas Contract (1984)

Recommendable? Yes, if you're interested in Dick's first appearance as Nightwing and classic Titans-stories. This is *the* Teen Titans-story. It is an arc within the pages of New Teen Titans/Tales of the Teen Titans. Be aware of the dense 80s style. It's manageable though.

What is it?

Deathstroke makes his move against the Titans and captures all of them except Dick. Dick takes on the identity of Nightwing and has to save his team with the help of Slade's son Joey Wilson.

What do I like about it?

If you read all of New Teen Titans (which you should because it's a masterpiece), you'll feel the masterful build-up to this arc. It's a pretty well-known spoiler but I won't spoil it here in case you're not familiar.

This specific arc shows Dick fully stepping into his own and moving forward with his new identity. It's a central piece of characterization for him. He's also really badass here, the way he takes on Deathstroke. He's the only non-powered Titans but he deserves to be there 100%. This arc really shows what Dick contributes to the team.

I also love the introduction of Joey. He's a great character - a pure cinnamon role with a compelling backstory and a great addition to the Titans. One of the few mute characters in comics. He actually communicates in sign language.

6. Titans: Rebirth (2016)

Recommendable? Yes, for the pure fun factor.

What is it?

It's the Titans coming together again. Wally is the driving factor here. He was erased from existence for a while due to the 2011-reboot (don't ask, you'll learn everything you need in this comic) and makes his friends remember him again. This time, the team consists of Dick, Wally, Roy, Donna, Garth and Lilith. Bumblebee and other characters also join at some point.

What do I like about it?

I love all of the characters. You just feel the love these long-time friends feel for each other. There are also so many great Dick & Wally-moments. The overall vibe is just very wholesome and I love spending time with all these characters.

My only gripe with this run is that the Titans are quite obedient to the Justice League. In my mind, the Titans should be their own independent network. The point of them is that they don't want to be controlled by their mentors. Still, this is a great run for anyone who likes these characters and wants to spend some time with them.

7. JLA/Titans The Technis Imperative (1998-1999)

Recommendable? Yes! A great story-arc that highlights what makes the Titans so special and different from the Justice League. There are information boxes for all key characters so newcomers should be able to catch up.

What is it?

An event-comic in which all the (former) Titans get abducted for a specific reason. The JLA and the Titans have to deal with what develops into a global crisis.

What do I like about it?

This story arc highlights why I love the Titans so much. They are friends who are close enough to be family while the JLA are more like co-workers. Many of the Titans get some great character moments, including Dick. There is a particularly heart-wrenching page here that says a lot about Dick's relationship with Bruce. Always a gut punch for me when I see it. Again - it's complex.

8. The Flash plus Nightwing (1996)

Recommendable? Yes, for everyone who loves a good Dick & Wally team-up. This is very much a beginning point for their very close friendship in modern comics.

What is it?

It's Dick & Wally going on their yearly vacation where shenanigans happen. Did I sell you on it yet? It's just one issue so it's a very quick read.

What do I like about it?

These two are just too much fun together. There are so many great character moments and you can just read it with some bare knowledge about Dick & Wally as characters (any fanfic-reader should be fine). The plot is also really wacky. Not spoiling it - but it gets wild.

I also love the premise that Dick & Wally go on yearly vacations together. It's a retcon (in the sense that it was never mentioned before & Dick&Wally weren't that close before) but it works so well - one of these great retcons. Since then, these two have been one of the best comic friendships. (And I like to ship them of course. So, any shipper's heart will also find some great moments here.)

Nightwing with the Batfam

These are the stories where Nightwing's relationships with the Batfam are in the foreground. I have two great arcs that deal with the relationship between Dick, Bruce, Alfred & Tim. They follow up on each other so you could just read them one after another:

9. Batman: Year Three (1989)

Recommendable? Yes, if you have bare knowledge about Batman-lore and Dick & Bruce as characters. Again, fanfic readers should be fine. This is very much related to Dick's backstory with Zucco - the killer of his parents. The arc is contained in Batman #436-439.

What is it?

Such an underrated story arc. Basically, it takes place after Jason's death and deals with the possibility of Tony Zucco coming out of prison. We see Dick, Bruce and Alfred reacting to the Zucco-situation.

What do I like about it?

This takes place after Jason's death but before Tim's introduction. So, it's a very dark time for the Bats - Bruce in particular as Batman gets more brutal. I love how this little arc illuminates Dick, Bruce & Alfred as characters. The characterization is very nuanced.

There are a lot of flashbacks back to Dick's time as Robin and the way he deals with grief. In the modern time, Nightwing tries very hard to get Batman back from his more violent tendencies. Great character moments for Dick, Bruce & Alfred!

10. A Lonely Place of Dying (1989)

Recommendable? Yes, again with knowledge of basic Batlore. A requirement for Tim Drake-fans because it's his proper introduction as a character! You can easily get this collected. It takes place directly after Batman: Year Three.

What is it?

The introduction of Tim Drake that takes place after Jason's death. He has figured out Batman's identity and sees the brutal rampages Batman goes on. So, that little fanboy goes up to our boy Nightwing and tries to convince him to become Robin again.

What do I like about it?

This story sold me on Tim Drake as a character. It is very much a case for why Batman needs a Robin. Tim, Dick & Bruce get great character moments. Dick's & Bruce's relationship is very complex here again. You also see Dick meeting one of his little brothers for the first time which is a lot of fun.

Nightwing with the Outsiders

This is a very special time in Nightwing's history. This recommendation shows him with the Outsiders - a more edgy team:

11. Outsiders by Judd Winick (2003-2007)

Recommendable? Yes, if you want to see a moodier Nightwing with a more edgy team. Also, for any Dick/Roy-shippers. I see you and I hear you. This is like the Dick/Roy-bible.

What is it?

The Outsiders form as a black ops team. Their mission statement is to do what other teams aren't willing/ready to do. Roy gets Nightwing on as the leader. Other team members are Jade, Anissa Pierce, Grace Choi, a version of Metamorpho (it's complicated) and Indigo.

What do I like about it?

On paper, I should dislike this concept. Nightwing is very moody here and a giant asshole (I love my boy but he screws up hard here). There is very much a reason though for Dick's mood shift:

Donna - his bestie - died before the Outsiders formed and the Titans disbanded for that reason. Dick is very much grieving and doesn't want to join any teams. He doesn't want to get close to anyone again for the fear of losing them. Still, Roy gets him to join the Outsiders under the condition that they won't be friendly with each other - purely professional.

So, the premise of the comic and the context explains Dick's cold and harsh behavior. I like this comic because it's interesting to see Dick in this dark place. Despite his attempts though, he can't help but get attached over time. He also has so many fights with Roy. The tension between these two is running high - no wonder you see so many Dick/Roy fics related to this time (it's headcanon though, I don't want to mislead anyone here).

Also, the characterization for each team member is supreme. I hadn't read much with characters like Jade, Anissa or Grace before but they quickly became some of my favorite DC-characters.

Dick/Roy may not be canon here but Grace/Anissa is a *canon sapphic romance* within the pages of this comic. It's a wonderful relationship and very unexpected for the early/mid 2000s. So, this may also interest you if you are looking for some cool LGBT+ superhero-couples.

This comic shouldn't work on paper but it did. It has so much heart that I can recommend it also to those who may not find the idea of Nightwing in his edgy-phase appealing. An interesting time for his character that I'll probably dig into at some point with a future post.

Events

Events often concern the entire DC-universe. They bring characters together. Here, I recommend an event where Nightwing is part of the larger cast and gets some character moments that made me very happy as a Nightwing-fan:

12. Infinite Crisis (2005-2006)

Recommendable? Yes, also if you are interested in reading an iconic DC-event where most of the DC-universe comes out to play. This also has some great moments for Dick & Bruce's complex relationship.

What is it?

A giant DC-event. Basically, characters from the old DC-universe try to erase the new DC-universe because they believe that the new universe is too dark and corrupted. What is Dick's role here? He's involved in the action and there are some great character moments that will make most Nightwing-fans squeal with joy (okay, maybe it was just me).

What do I like about it?

It's an epic event. The action is big, so many great characters are here, incredible art... But apart from that, this event shows how much Bruce loves, respects and appreciates Nightwing. I won't spoil this moment but it shows how important Nightwing is to the DC-universe. The original plan for this event was to kill Nightwing off so they were really trying to make you sentimental about him. Thankfully, he didn't die so we only get the wonderful character moments highlighting our boy's impact.

It also has another big character moment in Nightwing's history that is related to his city. Slade is a real bastard here and this is a key event in their rivalry.

Comics that didn't quite make my list:

Nightwing by Chuck Dixon (1996-2002)

Recommendable? Depends, if you want to see where much of Nightwing's lore comes from and don't mind older tropes and writing.

What is it?

The first long-running Nightwing-solo. Dixon established Nightwing as a solo hero in Blüdhaven after his time on the Titans. He takes on a lot of organized crime and one of his most iconic villains Blockbuster.

Why do I not quite recommend it?

This is probably the most iconic Nightwing-run. It firmly cemented Nightwing as a solo hero and established Blüdhaven as his city. If you want to understand where much of Nightwing's lore comes from, you should read it. I'm personally glad I read it and got a lot of enjoyment out of it.

I wouldn't quite recommend it though especially to newcomers because it feels quite dated in some of the writing and art. A lot of the tropes are well-worn and I needed some time to get into it. The plot can feel a bit unremarkable with Dick working his way from one forgettable gangster to another.

Dick is also characterized in a more angsty way. It fits with this point in time because he still has a lot of tensions with Bruce and is struggling with his independence. Still, not my favorite characterization of his. I'm definitely grateful this run exists though because modern Nightwing builds on this a lot. Anyone interested in Nightwing's history should read it.

New 52: Nightwing by Kyle Higgins (2011-2014)

Recommendable? Depends. It's very understandable for newcomers but it is held back by more company-wide decisions. What do I mean by this? Let me explain.

Why do I not quite recommend it?

In 2011, DC rebooted its entire universe. Newcomers could just jump on. This also goes for this run. In principle, it's cool that newcomers can just pick this up but the New 52 (as it's called) had a lot of issues though which you can feel here.

A lot of the beloved Batfamily-characters are missing (Cassandra Cain, Stephanie Brown) and the lore is very stripped down (this Nightwing was never really part of the Titans). So, the entire universe feels more empty and bleak.

More importantly though for this run, there were a lot of Batfamily-events (Death in the Family, Night of the Owls). These events call all of the Batfamily together and they interrupted the storylines that were currently happening in Nightwing. So, you can feel that Higgins isn't really allowed to let loose because he has to write around these events.

So, I can't really recommend this run as one of your first Nightwing runs. I would still encourage anyone to check it out eventually because I got a lot of enjoyment from it. You can feel that Higgins has a lot of love for Nightwing and when he is allowed to let loose (especially towards the end), he has some brilliant character moments.

I would be happy if he came back to Nightwing at some point with more creative freedom. He still delivered a solid run despite all the hurdles he was forced to overcome. There are just other runs which are more in line with the more classic Nightwing-lore that I would recommend first.

This is it! Take some deep breath because this was a long list. Again, these are all my opinions and there may be stuff I missed or haven't read yet. Nightwing-fans are quite divided on many of these stories.

So, pick what seems interesting to you. I've got enjoyment out of pretty much every Nightwing-solo run (except the run with the tentacles, don't ask).

I have a list of Robin!Dick-recommendations up and I'm going to make one for Batman!Dick-recommendations.

#nightwing #Comic recommendations #titans #new teen titans #batfamily #bruce wayne #tim drake #wally west #dick Grayson #dc comics

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marrow-minded · 1 year

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v7/v8 made me dislike ruby a lot but v9 made me really side with her. i've been in her shoes, with having to put on a strong happy face for everyone because their problems always seem to be bigger than mine.

but to see yang walk ahead of blake to shield her from ruby really broke me. like?? do you not know your own sister?? do you genuinely think she'd harm her own teammate??

blake doesn’t need protection, and it’s weird how yang tries to shield her like ruby is about to hurt her. i get bumbleby's whole thing is "we're protecting each other"

but that doesn't mean go and protect blake (who has shown she can hold her own in a verbal argument anyway) against your own sister, yang!

sorry for the rant, i just am in shock that this was written and executed this way with no one thinking of how ruby would feel from this. ruby was somehow more effected by jaune's rant (which, while valid, doesn't change the fact that jaune basically held a whole town hostage for 10-20 years) than by yang shielding blake.

as a certified Older Sibling that actually had to raise their siblings, its so wild to me how the writers seem to not want them to be sisters during this volume

:readmore:

like. from rubys seeming confusion at weiss saying "about time" to yang and blake flirting-- bc ruby is the team leader, she should be aware of the interpersonal development of her teammates, and also thats her SISTER ur telling me ruby wouldnt be a lil shit about her sisters crush on blake?-- to the more obvious, egregious issues that yang displays the entire volume about ruby and her mental health, its increasingly obvious to me that the writers of rwby struggle with writing their characters to have multiple different dynamics and relationships with multiple people, either from a lack of skill or an inability to diversify their characters emotional states

thats the problem with a) having all four main girls personalities mimic and mirror each other. there very little between their dialogue (until v9) that distinguishes them from each other; the words blake says could have been spoken by yang, whose lines could have been weiss', whose lines could have been rubys, whose lines could have been blakes, etc etc. until we get to v9 where suddenly blake is this flirty happy "bridge between humans and faunus" who can make plans when rubys unable to, who is more than happy to lead them through a fairytale without a care for the real world. and yang is back to being her quick to violence jokester, who seemingly never learned a lesson about starting fights and relying on her semblance. weiss is literally a joke, her character swinging rapidly between sadness for her fallen kingdom and physical comedic relief thats kinda... odd. and ruby... well. we know what rubys like in v9. but the point of all this is Suddenly all four girls are acting Very Different, not just between themselves but between their previous selves. it makes me wonder if these new personalities (sans depressed ruby who just had to be told her mother loved her and she kinda got over it all) going forward-- but this all means that yang and blakes relationship HAS to take priority for both characters at the loss of their other dynamics. we got half a second of blake and weiss actually talking and working together (which they failed, btw, somehow weiss and blake, the two smart ones, couldnt figure it out) where we get them shyly saying "im glad youre here" as if theyre barely friends, we dont get to see either of them actually find each other or ruby and the reunion-- but blake gets to glomp yang and cling to her and cry and have yang comfort her and hold her tight; weiss and ruby, who are also partners dont get that. RUBY AND YANG WHO ARE SISTERS DONT GET THAT.

which leads me into b) why are the teams even done the way they are. why is there an assigned team leader. isnt the whole point and culture of remnant that everyone is unique, every one has something special they can bring to a team? shouldnt a team of four be on equal footing with each other, where if there is a team leader its due to a vote by the members OF SAID TEAM? not some literal stranger after seeing one (1) fight based off the relics they picked on the first day of school?

idk thats more of just a flaw on rwbys worldbuilding and how frankly its kinda Silly to give ruby this angst about being team leader when A) multiple characters throughout the show have shown not to he happy and cheerful all the time and have never been punished for it, and those characters have only been met with love and support; where is this idea coming from where ruby thinks she cant be upset? she was literally upset a day ago when finding out about the hound and yang actively comforted her. nora was met with love and support with HER suicide attempt, was that why ruby veered to this extreme? idk and B) she spent more time as a member of RNJR and then as a conglomeration of two teams + two adults, and then they were huntsmen in atlas, where we didnt see team RWBY actually be a team at all.

anyways im spiraling off into other issues with the writing bc every bad writing choice in rwby spawns from fifteen others scattered throughout the show lol

as for ruby being more affected by jaunes outburst than yang defending ruby... well if i was ruby, id also be used to yang prioritizing blake and herself over me this point; both of them are basically strangers to me with all the shit they went through and all the shit i went through when we werent in each others lives and neither of them seem to be able to function without each other-- given that yang spent the whole time blowing up at ren and worrying about blake, and blake was unable to kill a single grimm without begging for help from ruby-- and jaune has been rubys best friend since the first day of beacon, and they have genuinely spent more time being partners and working together than ruby has had with any of her teammates. and regardless of what we, the audience, feel about his rant, to RUBY hes right; it IS all about her. the weight of the world is on her shoulders and she thinks shes fucking everything up and jaune just validated those feelings of failure, albeit unintentionally, given his own debilitated mental state

(i dont think i precisely agree the the paper pleasers were hostage but to be fair i think the whole paper pleaser thing was stupid in general bc when they ascend... they just have the same purpose? theyre just made of like gemstones instead of folded paper which isnt much of an improvement in the destructability scale tbh lol i see the paper pleasers as more metaphorical in a meta sense but then again i watched all of v9 blitzed out of my gourd so im not an expert and also everyone is entitled to their own interpretations lol)

sorry for just sort of going off and away from the main point of ur ask which was about the warped dynamic of yang and ruby; like i said, ever issue spirals back and around to twelve other problems and v9 is TERRIBLE WITH IT. v9 is just so WEIRD and not in a cool interesting way but in a... filler ooc way. it confuses my brain the way a tangled strand of a fine delicate necklace compels me; it looks interesting and sometimes i make a breakthrough but mostly its just tangled up in a weird knot that only seems to get worse the more i try and unravel it

#thanks for the ask!#rwde #v9 spoilers #i could literally ramble forever about the failures of rwby.

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thelittlesunlena · 2 years

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Revision ( + new ones) of my Submas headcanons because the blorbos have stirred in my head long enough for a new list

Childhood headcanons angst edition

They absolutely got bullied as kids

They'd practice not walking in sync but they'd trip faster

Emmet got bullied more because of his quieter voice, teachers could hear Ingo from miles away

Emmet didn't start talking until he was, like, 5 years old

Ingo would do the talking for him and didn't mind

They shared a room but decorated their sides differently

They have a single mom

They lived in a small town and had to take the train to the city for school

The subway employees liked them a lot and would get them snacks or ice cream after school

It took Ingo longer to learn how to ride a bike, Emmet patiently taught him how to

Matching bracelets

The first time they bought something for eachother's birthday they accidentally bought the same thing

The bullying ended in highschool because they grew taller than everybody else

Emmet's better at maths while Ingo's better at subjects like geography and history

Ingo can concentrate on studying for longer but needs a bit more time

Emmet remembers things faster and would most of the time study last minute

They're both smart as hell

They went to college and shared a dorm

Emmet studied Technology and Engineering

Ingo studied Business Administration and Commerce

They went on their pokemon journey during their childhood but I can't decide on an age

They absolutely got all their gym badges and even beat the elite four and champion at one point

Adult edition

Emmet listens to music when showering and Ingo has to absolutely remind him to not turn the volume up to 100

In turn Ingo sings in the shower and is absolutely too loud

Ingo isn't a morning person and needs much longer to wake up

At work they both take a nap during luch time

They don't have a driver's license but they do have one of those scooters that you don't need a license for

Or a bike

Ingo's the cook out of the two

Emmet is a bigger eater than Ingo

Most of the time they just get fastfood while walking home from work

Emmet has a "build your own train model" set that he got from Ingo for his birthday and he has been working on it for a while

Emmet bought Ingo a bookset of thrillers and detective stories that Ingo loves reading a bit of every night

Because they're always inside the subway they have a vitamind d deficiency

Yes their little vitamin containers are either train or PokeBall shaped

Have you seen any siblings together ever? The blorbos absolutely get into fights and arguments

"You're mom's second favorite" is their most used insult when properly angry

"How's this jacket look Emmet?"

- "Ugly."

" You're wearing the same jacket."

- "Well, I'm prettier than you."

"Emmet we're identical."

Their snack cabinet is color coded so they don't eat eachother's snacks

They eat eachother's snacks regardless

Emmet goes on runs with Archeops in the evening

Feel free to add onto this list with your own or share your opinions 😊

#submas #ingo #subway masters #pokemon black and white #kudari #nobori #battle subway #pokemon legend arceus #subway boss ingo #subway boss emmet #pokemon emmet #ingo and emmet

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anonymousfoz · 10 months

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Crimson Eclipse #7

Part 6 | Part 9

The two outcasts continued to bond over the past week as they began to see each other more and more. Crimson would sneak into town, and the two would meet at the library, or they went hunting in the deadly forest. He was always thinking about how Luna reminded him of his sister, whom he has lost so long ago. He hadn't bonded with anyone like this since his sister had passed. He isolated himself from everyone to make sure he couldn't lose another person when in reality the only person lost was himself. Shut off from the world and is deemed a monster by the people that used to be friends with him. Constant betrayal was something he was used to. So this was a nice change of pace. Yet he wondered if Luna was going to betray him, she had no reason or motive currently, but that fear of "what if" always stayed in the back of his mind. His dark thoughts always popping up at the worst time and becoming louder to where he couldn't drown them out. "Crimson." Crimson turned around to see Luna poking out of her tent, she had worked all day yesterday and decided to spend all day with him to make up for it. "Sorry, am I thinking too loudly?" Crimson was still getting new to this concept that someone could hear his every thought and that his thoughts had volume. It made sense when his darker thoughts were louder than his typical thinking but it was still hard to wrap his head around it. Luna came outside her tent and sat beside Crimson. "No. Your doing fine, just your thoughts are sad." Luna sighed before continuing. "I also shut myself off from people once my parents left. I tell people they always will come back. They told me they won't due to me being a liability with my powers. Something I didn't ask for. They took the dog over me. It sucks but I learned that people in life always come and go, and you want to keep those you love most closest." Crimson looked down at Luna before hugging her. He didn't know how to feel, this was the first time both of them had really opened up about their past and struggles. "Your parents don't deserve you anyways." Luna heard the rage in his voice, she could tell Crimson was trying to hide it, but he wasn't doing a good job. "Besides, how good can that mutt be?" "The dog has worse people skills than you." Crimson's rage turned into laughter as he wasn't expecting Luna to respond. The two continued to chatter through the night, then fell asleep under the stars. Crimson hugged Luna close, promising himself that he wouldn't lose her. Luna reassured him that he would never lose her. It would be most likely that she would lose him.

#crimson eclipse #fiction #writing #story #writeblr #fantasy #my writing #pre-rebel arc

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parkeraerts · 1 year

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You Can't Tell Me What To Do...

It is actually quite comical how often I find myself having this conversation around social media and how I perceive it. Growing up watching TV shows like "Family Matters," "Full House," "The Nanny," and many other shows that aired in the 80s and 90s where the use of the internet was non-existent. Everyone once in a wild, I find myself going down memory lane and binging one or more of these series to escape the todays reality of advanced, high-speed technology, internet, and social media platforms. Solely looking at this aspect of this time period, this would be my ideal level of social media: none. Well, alright, maybe a little. However, I find myself thinking about the lack of control and the amount of freedom that they had from technology, let alone social media. The article "Before the Internet" by Emma Rathbone, put me in this same state of mind where I envision being free of technology and social media and the chains that it has on me.

Almost a year ago, I caved and created a Facebook profile. It wasn't something I really wanted to do but felt as if it were something that I needed to do for a variety of reasons. A major component of this was that my job entails me working and being active on Facebook. When I took over the reigns for the company that I am at, I was left no choice but to create and engage on Facebook. At our company, we use Facebook groups to communicate with staff at a high volume. For some events, we hire in up to 350 security guards to perform services. We have found that the best way to do this was by creating groups on Facebook. The thought behind this is that it allow us to communicate with everyone in real time and on a platform that an overwhelming majority of people are on very actively versus having people download an application that they have never used and having to teach everyone how to communicate using it at a high level in a short period of time. On top of that, I have to understand advertisement campaigns, algorithms, and more on Facebook to help make the company as popular as possible. So, on a day to day basis, I work on Facebook to promote our company, upcoming events, communicate with clients and staff.

When it comes to my personal life, I can see on every social media platform that I am a part of that they have mastered my algorithm. I see ads, videos, pictures, statuses and more that pertain to my lifestyle, ideals, hobbies, friends, and family. When I'm on my personal time, this can cause me to get caught going down "rabbit holes" on social media where I find myself on different platforms watching videos that have me stuck. Much like Max Stossels discussed in his presentation, I sometimes find myself thinking, "Am I using technology or is technology using me?" I found it bizarre that only 50% of teens believe that they are addicted to their mobile devices, per the presentation. I would've assumed that number was much higher.

The summer between Freshman and Sophomore year, I worked at a summer camp in Boyne Falls, MI where there was no cellular service for miles and we only had a limited wifi plan available that was designated for official office use only. It was different. It would feel weird when I would come home or go into town and reconnect with the world. There was always some big news that some new album dropped, a new scandal occurred, and someone new usually died. So it was hard to think everyone else was getting real time updates via the internet and social media yet we wouldn't hear of big updates for up to two weeks after they happened. It was hard only because I felt as if I was at a disadvantage compared to the rest of the world.

I would love to be able to use technology in a way that has a little more intent than it does right now. It is very often I find myself going on one of my devices to email someone back and then 10 minutes later, I'm on my third Facebook video and I still haven't sent that email. This happens all the time. So, in the future, I would love to have more control over this and other factors that draw us in like Max Stossels referred to. I would also love to not have to use my phone as a "safe place" when I'm entering situations that I am not comfortable in. I am extremely guilty of this and like Stossels said, many of us are. I would love to just embrace this level of awkwardness and not feel like I have to default to using my phone as a resource to protect me. I would love to be free of these chains.

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azems-familiar · 1 year

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@ipreferfiction tagged me in this a few days ago and i promptly forgot to do it, so here we are. i uhhhhhhhhhhhh do not have anything star wars related to share currently, whoops, but i can toss up a snippet of an mdzs/the untamed fic i'm working on!

tagging @thelavenderhimbo @exlibrisastra @sleepswithvillains @tarrevizsla and whoever else wants to do it!

It’s an unseasonably warm summer day and classes have once again been canceled as shufu works on the persistent problem of the waterborne abyss in Biling Lake. With classes not happening and xiongzhang working with the swordsmanship classes he usually supervises, Lan Wangji finds himself at something of a loss. His only real responsibility during the guest lectures is to supervise the visiting disciples, but with the weather and the newfound freedom, many of them have chosen to spend the day in Caiyi Town, away from the three thousand rules and the chance of punishment. Wei Wuxian - Wei Ying - is likely among them, since Lan Wangji knows for a fact that Jiang Wanyin and Nie Huiasang departed earlier, and the three of them are close.

It does not grate, watching their interactions from the outside and knowing that they would never willingly include him. He is quite used to being alone, and he has little desire to make friends, no matter what xiongzhang thinks he needs; he is comfortable being seen as stony and silent and emotionless, the cold Second Jade of Lan. He watches them not because he wants to be a part of their camaraderie but because he cannot understand how they integrate so smoothly together, how they touch each other without thinking, expressing their every emotion so casually it must break a rule. And then there is Wei Wuxian himself, who delights in breaking every rule he can, causing chaos wherever he goes - who is somehow the most brilliant man Lan Wangji has ever met, the only person of their generation he could consider his equal. From the moment they first crossed blades under the moonlight, he knew the YunmengJiang’s head disciple would be the only one who could match him.

And this rare talent is being wasted on a man who is frivolous and infuriating, with no sense of decorum, who laughs in the face of judgement (until he realizes someone else will be getting in trouble, and then begs for the elders to recognize that it was his fault and only his fault), who revels in answering every question shufu poses as outlandishly as possible (but knows every answer, and spends afternoons tutoring the other Jiang disciples with an infinite amount of patience and an active and engaging teaching style), who regularly stays out past curfew and says it’s because he wants to watch the stars (and looks utterly ethereal under the night sky). Wei Wuxian is the most frustrating man he has ever met.

Lan Wangji might be in love with him.

But for as much as Wei Wuxian seems to enjoy following him around, calling his birth name out at deafening volumes whenever they’re in any kind of proximity, and teasing him with comments that edge along the line between good fun and flirting, he still chooses to spend his free days with his shidi and his close friend. And Lan Wangji is fine with that, because it means he does not have to deal with the confusing mess of emotion that knots his chest whenever Wei Wuxian and his brilliant laugh and bright red ribbon are around. He is most certainly not jealous, because the two of them are barely even friends, so there is nothing to be jealous of.

At least, so he tells himself as he wanders away from the main compounds and training grounds towards the back hill. If spending his afternoon practicing new music scores surrounded by nature means he won’t be near the gates when the guest disciples inevitably come back, chattering and laughing together, then that is a secondary benefit to the fact that he hasn’t had a day to himself since the lectures began and he’s beginning to feel stifled by all the unfamiliar faces moving so freely through his home. It will be nice to be properly alone for a few hours - perhaps he can check on the rabbits Wei Wuxian left him, who are very much not pets, and therefore allowed.

The sound of a flute interrupts his musings, and Lan Wangji finds himself following the melody, something light and lilting and cheerful that sounds nothing like the songs he’s used to hearing in Gusu. He climbs the small hill separating him from the path that runs along the riverbank as the sound gets louder, only to freeze the moment he crests it.

Wei Wuxian is sitting next to the river, one foot dangling over the bank into the water, his back against a tree. An elegantly carved dizi painted in warm browns and blues with a YungmengJiang purple tassel attached to the end rests against his lips and his eyes are closed, an expression of something like serenity on his face. A breeze rustles his hair and the red ribbon in it, carries the dizi’s airy song off into the distance (and that suddenly seems unbearable, the idea that anyone else might hear this impromptu concert and come looking for its cause), and the rich summer sunlight dapples golden and heavy across his fingers where they dance across the dizi’s holes. The song comes to a close and Wei Wuxian takes a deep breath in and shifts seamlessly into another one, a melody that twines with the rush of the river and the birdsong, and there is no spiritual power in it whatsoever, but all the same, Lan Wangji feels strangely at peace.

He listens to three more melodies before he finally speaks into the small gap between songs. “I did not know you played an instrument,” he says, carefully, the words feeling strangely thick and muted on his tongue. He is loath to disturb the air, but this entire performance is a strangely private thing, and he has begun to feel nearly- voyeuristic, watching the other man pour out his heart into his music without any knowledge of his observer.

Wei Wuxian squawks and startles so badly he falls into the river.

#long post #things i'm tagged in #mdzs #wangxian #my writing

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