#am i nonbinary | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ghostisventing · 9 months

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I find myself disgusted/uncomfortable/scared of men and idk if it’s the trauma or am I just not attracted to men?

#am I nonbinary #wtf is wrong with me why does everything feel fake even liking girls but that’s not fake wtf #identity crisis #identity issues #bpd #social anxiety #lesbian #bisexual #bisexual women #sapphic #pls help #non binary lesbian #non binary bisexual #vent #am i a lesbian #questioning

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theworthynerodivergent · 1 year

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More on being nonbinary

I have joined some communities since coming to this conclusion and they have made me feel more confident in my thoughts and feelings.

After doing some research I can say that I believe that I am a nonbinary trans masc. I know this can be defined differently from person to person so for me I’d say I feel like I can go between feeling masculine and feminine but I feel that I lean more toward masculine majority of the time. Sometimes I feel like I do feel like neither and I’m just here existing.

For me, I’ve noticed discovering this has been more emotional for me than coming to the conclusion I have adhd. I think it’s because this has the potential to drastically change my life. If it does I’m pretty sure it will be for the better but still change is scary.

While discovering adhd is more of an ah I understand and I can work to work with this being nonbinary is more like time to begin the journey of acceptance, learning, and unlearning and I think it’s forcing me out of my comfort zone of putting myself last to appease others.

With this, I no longer wish to put myself last. I want to feel comfortable in my skin and be proud of who I am. This is going to be a long journey but it’s one I want to take being scared and all.

I told my boyfriend of… wow 8 years yesterday and while he’s not entirely surprised he said that he needs time to process. It was hard for me to do it so it was nice to hear that he accepts me for who I am and loves me no matter what. Tho this still may change things in our relationship and I’ve decided I’ll be ok with whatever happens.

As far as pronouns idk yet I say for now I’m ok with any and all this may change later.

As far as my appearance I already dress sort of masculine but I want to fully commit now and I was thinking of also getting a binder but I have a big chest (44 F) so idk what would be a good one for me. If anyone has any suggestions I am open to hearing them.

This self-discovery journey of mine has been very eye-opening, emotional, draining, overwhelming, stressful, and reassuring. I’m learning so much about myself and realizing I’m not lazy, crazy, or dumb and there is a reason for my experiences and they are valid just like my feelings.

From learning about adhd, the trauma that I’ve been in denial about (more on that later), and identifying as nonbinary this has been a wild transformative few months. I am very curious to find out more about myself.

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rincewind87 · 6 months

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I picked up my kid from the library a few days ago and grabbed a "they/them" pronoun pin out of their basket. I'm not even sure why I did it.

Last night I had a dream that I wore the pin to a queer event. I don't think the dream even got as far as actually going to the event; it stopped after the decision to wear the pin.

Maybe this is something I need to investigate further.

#pronouns #trans shit #am i nonbinary #wtf #im like 20 years post transition ftm

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wackywyvern · 2 years

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Hey, do cis people look at a character of a different gender and want to BE them? Or is that not normal?

#am i nonbinary #gender #am i demiboy #demiboy

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barclaygoodrow · 2 years

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Gender does not have to be so fucky

#once again.#am I actually a very very butch lesbian #Am I nonbinary #or am I just trying to push myself into femininity to people please after hearing transphobic remarks in the kitchen #I ask myself this every couple months and always come back to being trans man who just hates himself a lot

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gigglescapone · 1 year

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#lesbian #dykeposting #am i nonbinary #i think i’m nonbinary #maybe gender-fluid

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feluka · 3 months

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oh god shut up. you didn't even know the damn kid.

"The children are always ours, every single one of them, all over the globe, and I am beginning to suspect that whoever is incapable of recognizing this may be incapable of morality." — James Baldwin

#i am honestly not even sure who you're referring to #the most recent child deaths i've reblogged are #nex benedict (the nonbinary kid murdered at school) and hind rajab #if you can't see why either of these should shatter your heart without personally knowing them #then you're entirely beyond any hope #asks #edit: this was about hind.

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ftm-radio · 8 months

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[SCENE: driving back from my appointment]

dad: ...am I going to have to teach you how to shave?

me: uh yeah! at some point, lol

dad: hm. well I can show you the way I prefer, with mug soap and a brush, because the aerosol cans are just no. I showed your brother my way and he likes it a lot better too...

dad: [rambles for a bit]

dad: ...it's really just another chore, you look in the mirror and go 'ugh I have to shave soon' so it's just one of those things you do every once in a while

me, externally: haha yeah, I can't wait :]

me, internally: he's talking about this like it's no big deal, it's not weird at all,,, he doesn't mind the idea of teaching me despite the fact that he never expected to be doing this with me,,,, he's my dad and he supports me even if he doesn't completely get it,,,

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captainjackscoat · 1 month

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I want to go to a gay bar

However I do not want to go to a gay bar because I do not, nor will I ever, drink alcohol. I do not particularly want to be around drunks.

So instead of a gay bar, I propose a Queer Cat Cafe.

Non allergenic cats ofc

There's a section of the cafe where the cats can't go if you don't want cats near you. That section is the library.

There are lil pride flags everywhere, even the obscure ones.

They sell pride pins for £1.50ish each at the counter.

There are LED lights.

It's autism friendly, lights can be toned down if needed and everything is neatly spaced out

You can have a sticker to write your pronouns on

Mostly queer artists/songs played

feel free to add on

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transassdemon · 8 days

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[My art, don't steal, tag if reposting]

#something about how much i relate to 'burn your village' and all the stories of women fighting for their power #and also i am not a woman but i know that situation #and i recently thought that i feel as if i inherited anger of my mother and all the women in my family #anger issues #violent thoughts #ftm #transmasc #nonbinary #gender nonconforming #lgbt #transpride #bigender #enby #trans man #misogny #feminism #women's rights #kiki rockwell #burn your village

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rabidpunkradio · 2 months

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if you have nonbinary friends , please ask them what their personal gender looks like to them before assigning your idea of nonbinary to them . not all nonbinary people use they/them , not all nonbinary people are gender neutral , not all nonbinary people are genderless , not all nonbinary people are androgynous , some people under the nonbinary umbrella dont even call themselves nonbinary . the whole thing about nonbinary is that its not a set thing . it's not another box , its a placeholder for a billion unique experiences

#ventish #maverique #nonbinary #genderqueer #radfems fuck off and die #i am so fucking tired of blocking people from this post

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theworthynerodivergent · 1 year

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So.. I Think I’m nonbinary

Reasons why:

I am afab but I never felt like I’ve fit into that gender.

I’ve always wished I was a boy but now idk if I can see myself fully as a boy either.

I feel like I’m in the middle or I can go between feeling more feminine or more masculine.

I’ve never admitted this or even gave it much thought until recently (I’m 31) because of my family and other factors but I’m tired of presenting myself in a way that is comfortable for them but not for me.

Not really sure what to do next or if I’m right but I wanted to write this as a way of acknowledging it and not ignoring these feelings/ thoughts like I’ve been doing.

#nonbinary?#black nonbinary #am I nonbinary #idk for sure #self discovery #figuring myself out #trying to be true to myself #about me #undiagnosed adhd #mental health #black neurodiversity #accepting myself

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just-your-average-tangerine · 1 year

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The line between binary and nonbinary trans people is nowhere near as clean as some of yall think it is

#transgender #trans #nonbinary #like i guess i would be considered a 'binary' trans man #i wouldnt consider myself that for two reasons #first because the idea that gender is binary is bullshit to begin with so why would i identify within it #and second because i am a man only in that i am a gay man #i dont identify outside of manhood im terms of gender #but my gender is so linked to my sexuality that it cant be neatly tracked onto a binary view of 'man'#but because i am a man other consider me 'binary' regardless of how i feel about it #and yet will still refuse to use he/him pronouns in favor of exclusively using they/them #but thats a different discussion #op

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socialistexan · 1 year

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I'm so tired of cis people asking stuff like, "Why would Texas want a list of trans people who legally changed their names?" or "Why would Florida want a list of college students who have seeking gender affirming care? We can't figure it out."

It's eliminationist.

Ken Paxton wants a list of trans people who have changed their name in Texas so he can reverse all of those decisions (and that's the most charitable interpretation). Ron DeSantis wants a list of college students who have sought affirming care so he can force them to detransition.

Oklahoma introduced a bill to forcibly detransition people under the age of 21 (ironically doing what they accuse us of doing, forcing someone to live as the wrong gender). Texas has a new bill that will ban gender affirming care for every Texan of any age and makes it a felony for doctors to provide it. Multiple states either have passed or will pass bills that will ban legal name changes. Some states have slipped in language to anti-drag bills (which are horrific enough on their own) that ban anyone from displaying, presenting, or dressing outside their "biological" gender (one state has language about "DNA gender") in public.

It's about legally and morally mandating trans people out of existence.

Plain and simple. It's about making sure that trans people can not exist. Period. It's not about restrictions, or "think of the children!" It's about eliminating us from public life and then eliminating us from private life so that we have a choice of either die or conform.

When will y'all realize this isn't some wedge issue or a political football that they'll just give up on if they lose an election or two. These are ideologues who are singularly focused. They don't care about the marketplace of ideas. They don't give a shit if they get mocked on lefty Twitter and the late night shows. They only care about one thing: gaining and then wielding power to achieve their goal of eliminating trans people (and then gay people, and then women who don't conform to their gender standards, ect).

If you give them that power they will use it.

#trans #transgender #nonbinary #lgbtq #lgbt #i kinda have nowhere to go here if theres forced detrans i have breasts now i am getting bottom surgery #like you take me off my hormones and i just... dont have sex hormones anymore #or we'll just have to go underground again just like we had to in the 1930's

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inkskinned · 10 months

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so one of the things that's so horrifying about birth control is that you have to, like, navigate this incredibly personal choice about your body and yet also face the epitome of misogyny. like, someone in the comments will say it wasn't that bad for me, and you'll be utterly silenced. like, everyone treats birth control like something that's super dirty. like, you have no fucking information or control over this thing because certain powerful people find it icky.

first it was the oral contraceptives. you went on those young, mostly for reasons unrelated to birth control - even your dermatologist suggested them to control your acne. the list of side effects was longer than your arm, and you just stared at it, horrified.

it made you so mentally ill, but you just heard that this was adulthood. that, yes, there are of course side effects, what did you expect. one day you looked up yasmin makes me depressed because surely this was far too intense, and you discovered that over 12,000 lawsuits had been successfully filed against the brand. it remains commonly prescribed on the open market. you switched brands a few times before oral contraceptives stopped being in any way effective. your doctor just, like, shrugged and said you could try a different brand again.

and the thing is that you're a feminist. you know from your own experience that birth control can be lifesaving, and that even when used for birth control - it is necessary healthcare. you have seen it save so many people from such bad situations, yourself included. it is critical that any person has access to birth control, and you would never suggest that we just get rid of all of it.

you were a little skeeved out by the implant (heard too many bad stories about it) and figured - okay, iud. it was some of the worst pain you've ever fucking experienced, and you did it with a small number of tylenol in your system (3), like you were getting your bikini line waxed instead of something practically sewn into your body.

and what's wild is that because sometimes it isn't a painful insertion process, it is vanishingly rare to find a doctor that will actually numb the area. while your doctor was talking to you about which brand to choose, you were thinking about the other ways you've been injured in your life. you thought about how you had a suspicious mole frozen off - something so small and easy - and how they'd numbed a huge area. you thought about when you broke your wrist and didn't actually notice, because you'd thought it was a sprain.

your understanding of pain is that how the human body responds to injury doesn't always relate to the actual pain tolerance of the person - it's more about how lucky that person is physically. maybe they broke it in a perfect way. maybe they happened to get hurt in a place without a lot of nerve endings. some people can handle a broken femur but crumble under a sore tooth. there's no true way to predict how "much" something actually hurts.

in no other situation would it be appropriate for doctors to ignore pain. just because someone can break their wrist and not feel it doesn't mean no one should receive pain meds for a broken wrist. it just means that particular person was lucky about it. it should not define treatment.

in the comments of videos about IUDs, literally thousands of people report agony. blinding, nauseating, soul-crushing agony. they say things like i had 2 kids and this was the worst thing i ever experienced or i literally have a tattoo on my ribs and it felt like a tickle. this thing almost killed me or would rather run into traffic than ever feel that again.

so it's either true that every single person who reports severe pain is exaggerating. or it's true that it's far more likely you will experience pain, rather than "just a pinch." and yet - there's nothing fucking been done about it. it kind of feels like a shrug is layered on top of everything - since technically it's elective, isn't it kind of your fault for agreeing to select it? stop being fearmongering. stop being defensive.

you fucking needed yours. you are almost weirdly protective of it. yours was so important for your physical and mental health. it helped you off hormonal birth control and even started helping some of your symptoms. it still fucking hurt for no fucking reason.

once while recovering from surgery, they offered you like 15 days of vicodin. you only took 2 of them. you've been offered oxy for tonsillitis. you turned down opioids while recovering from your wisdom tooth extraction. everything else has the option. you fucking drove yourself home after it, shocked and quietly weeping, feeling like something very bad had just happened. the nurse that held your hand during the experience looked down at you, tears in her eyes, and said - i know. this is cruelty in action.

and it's fucked up because the conversation is never just "hey, so the way we are doing this is fucking barbaric and doctors should be required to offer serious pain meds" - it's usually something around the lines of "well, it didn't kill you, did it?"

you just found out that removing that little bitch will hurt just as bad. a little pinch like how oral contraceptives have "some" serious symptoms. like your life and pain are expendable or not really important. like maybe we are all hysterical about it?

hysteria comes from the latin word for uterus, which is great!

you stand here at a crossroads. like - this thing is so important. did they really have to make it so fucking dangerous. and why is it that if you make a complaint, you're told - i didn't even want you to have this in the first place. we're told be careful what you wish for. we're told that it's our fault for wanting something so illict; we could simply choose not to need medication. that maybe if we don't like the scraps, we should get ready to starve.

we have been saying for so long - "i'm not asking you to remove the option, i'm asking you to reconsider the risk." this entire time we hear: well, this is what you wanted, isn't it?

#where's the word woman in this u might wonder if u suck #good news i am nonbinary and have a uterus so that is something that can happen #im also gender fluid tho which means im immune to certain psychic damage bc if u call me a woman i'll be like <3 okay <3 #writeblr #the tightrope of ''ppl need access to this''#and like also #''what the fuck is going on over there'' is like. so difficult as an activist #i was <3 punctured <3 during mine #and almost bled out on the table :) they didn't have anyone standing by bc it's ''just a little insertion''#so i started crashing and i vaguely remember apologizing for the fuss as i heard my heart rate monitor start going <3 tachycardic <3 #she wasn't even a bad doctor tbh #ps btw the reason i even HAD a heart monitor is that i have a genuine heart condition and they knew GOING IN that there was a chance #i'd crash on the table #like my heart just likes to do fun little tricks and <3 stop working <3 (i do not want to discuss the specifics ty i am okay im ontop of it #and they were like 'oh u will be fine' and then she did do a puncture thru my uterus . pop!#and im sitting there dizzy and feeling my heartrate start to drop bc it feels almost. beautiful. like. the whole ground just #woosh! out from under you. and shit is like grey's anatomy. i'm looking up at her grey eyes #she's old she wears this nice shawl she's like got Cool Lesbian vibes and people are sprinting into the room #from other parts of the clinic unrelated to me. while the monitor is like a little aria singing #and shes like hey youre okay stay awake stay with me something went wrong we have to keep trying #and i remember thinking - i was trying to think of nice things. i have so many beautiful places that now overlap #with this terrible memory #i became dimly aware that there was too much on her wrists and hands. like #that was too many liters #and then when they had finished all this. i packed up and drove myself home #i have had (bad thing) happen to me. and the same feeling happened after #that numb almost lamblike bleating. you cry without noise. like. ur body is so shocked and ur mind so empty #you just stare at the road and everything everything is happening behind glass and static and you are standing so far away from it #while you hold ur hands at 10 and 2. and something in ur brain is SCREAMING at you - IT WAS BAD AND IT SHOULDNT HAVE HAPPENED #and ur just watching the alarms in your body going off and youre thinking. a little pinch! ha. i think i just lost something important.

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jetsi · 1 year

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Most fucked up chocolate i have ever seen

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