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#and it made me physically sick all night so I just really need this okay)
joelsgreys · 28 days
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fall into temptation | three
Post Outbreak Joel Miller x Preacher’s Daughter! Reader
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series masterlist l previous chapter
summary: Of all the women to catch Joel Miller’s attention—it just had to be one of the goddamned preacher’s daughters.
warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI. JACKSON ERA. SLIGHT PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION OF READER, mentions of her hair which she can put up into braids as well as her style of clothing. despite the nickname Joel gives her, it does not speak to her body type or size. AGE GAP (reader is in her 20’s and Joel is 56). several mentions of religion and religious symbols, reader has a father and two sisters, all who come with names, reader gets put into a a very uncomfortable situation, insecurity, anxiety, Seth is an asshole, protective Joel, he threatens to break someone’s jaw which is a warning in and of itself. SMUT. loss of virginity, reader is inexperienced but not totally clueless, oral (both m and f receiving), risky unprotected p in v sex (please wrap it up), lots of praise and pet names (baby, babygirl, honey, you know, the works), Joel gets a teensy bit rough, creampie, hint of aftercare, ends with a cliffhanger, but also not really if you think about it?
MOODBOARD FOR AESTHETIC PURPOSES ONLY, NO MENTION OF RACE OR BODY TYPE.
word count: 10k
a/n: it was not my intention to post this on jesus day, but here we are. this took forever and a day considering the second part was posted back in september, but i am so so proud of myself for finally completing a wip i could cry. i did a bulk of the editing while i’ve been sick and in all honesty i probably should have asked someone to beta for me because i think i coughed out like 90% of my brain cells this week, but i think it turned out okay. ish.
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Somehow, even over the volume of the live music, you could still hear their hushed, astonished whispers.
“Are you seeing what I’m seeing?”
“Is that Joel Miller with Pastor John’s daughter?”
“What’s she doing holding his hand?”
“He’s got to be at least twice her fucking age—”
Throat bobbing anxiously, you glanced up at Joel.
His shoulders were squared back, his head held high. 
Solid. Steady.
Joel couldn’t seem to care less about the bewildered stares, the judgment that was being flung his way. Not once did he seem to waver. But you?
Oh, you were already starting to crumble underneath it all, on the verge of falling apart right before everyone’s prying eyes. Shame sat heavily inside of your chest, the weight of the feeling suffocating you, making it harder and harder to breathe as it prevented air from reaching your lungs.
It had nothing to do with Joel. Of course it didn’t. It had all to do with you and with who you were. Their beloved preacher’s sweet, innocent young daughter. 
His youngest daughter. 
Suddenly, the whispers were no longer whispers.
“Oh God, she’s not going home with him, is she?”
“That’s not right! Someone should say something!”
“Pastor John would never allow something like this.”
“Poor thing’s naive—she doesn’t know any better.”
Hot, stubborn tears of frustration glazed over your eyes and threatened to spill. It was as if you were a child who didn’t know any better, a gullible, clueless little girl with nothing in her brain who needed to be rescued—saved from the bad, bad man before he did bad, bad things to her.
Had it been anyone else, no one would have batted an eye. No one would have noticed, let alone cared. But it was you that Joel Miller was leaving the bar with in the middle of the night and it was you whose hand he had clasped in his own. That is what made it wrong. That is why it was a problem.
Everyone’s concerns had nothing to do with him at all, they had everything to do with you. You, you, you. You were the sole reason why it was a problem, the reason why he was being perceived as the Devil himself, horns out as he dragged the poor little unsuspecting angel down to the fires of Hell.
“Joel?” Overwhelmed, you instinctively reached for his arm with your free hand. Cold and trembling, your little fingers curled tightly around his bicep, digging into the firm, bulging muscle through the thick corduroy fabric of his sleeve. You whispered his name again. “Joel—”
“S’alright, babygirl,” he reassured you quietly over his shoulder. He gave your hand a comforting squeeze. “S’alright. Just keep your eyes on me, sweetheart. I’ve got you. You just keep on lookin’ right at me, okay?”
Nodding, you inhaled deeply and focused on him. Only him. The broadness of his back and his shoulders. Tufts of hair that curled over the collar of his shirt. Only him. He’s what mattered. He’s all that mattered.
“Almost there,” Joel murmured, squeezing your hand again as the door came into view. “Breathe, baby. We’re almost there. I’ve got you. You’re alright. Ain’t gonna let anythin’ bad happen to you. Promise I’ve got you.”
It wasn’t until his fingers wrapped around the old, brass handle that you finally exhaled the breath you had been holding out in utter relief, though it was very, very short lived. Just as Joel pulled the door open, you felt a hand wrap around your arm. Dry, slender fingers dug into the soft flesh above your elbow as an attempt, and a feeble one at that, was made to tear you out of Joel’s grasp.
The music stopped and the bar fell silent. Everything and everyone came to a sudden standstill, freezing mid dance, mid drink, mid bite, mid gossip.
Shocked, you glanced over your shoulder. “Seth?” you squeaked his name. “What—what are you doing?”
Seth didn’t acknowledge you. His focus was on Joel.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing, Miller?”
Joel’s anger couldn’t be seen, but it could be felt. So palpable you could have wrapped your fingers around it. It radiated off of him and loomed over the entire bar like an incoming storm cloud. Threatening. Dangerous.
“Where are you taking her?” Seth demanded, his other hand curling around your wrist as he tried, but failed, to snatch you from Joel’s side once more. “Let the girl go! You let her go right now, you hear?”
Caught in between the two men, you nervously turned to look at Joel. Nostrils flared, jaw clenched, seething eyes that did the talking for him. His message was loud and oh so abundantly clear.
If Seth didn't take his hands off you, he wasn’t going to have any hands.
Not after Joel Miller was through with him.
Blazing heat flooded your face. As if it couldn’t possibly get any worse, everyone had now gathered around you to watch the tense encounter, eyes wide, brows raised and jaws practically on the weathered, hardwood floor.
Tommy Miller stood among the crowd, subtly shaking his head, his lips pressed together in a tight, thin line of disapproval as he glowered at his older brother. Would he be looking at Joel like that had it been Esther in your place? If she was the one he was taking home? Would any of this be happening if it was her instead of you?
“Seth.” Uttering his name, you shifted your attention back to him. You sounded calm and collected, despite feeling anything but. Joel’s hand in yours was the only thing keeping you steady and grounded. His touch was the only reason you hadn’t yet spiraled into a state of panic. Clearing your throat lightly, you spoke again and tried your hardest not to waver. “Please let go of me.”
Still fixed on Joel, he spat, “I’ll be damned if I let him take you anywhere.”
“He’s not taking me anywhere, Seth.” Without thinking, the words came tumbling out of your mouth—loud and clear for everyone in that room to hear. “He isn’t forcing me to go with him. I’m making the choice to leave with him. Out of my own volition. Please let go of me.”
Finally, Seth looked at you. His old, worn features were twisted in disbelief. “What?”
You swallowed dryly. Part of you wanted you to shrink away, curl into yourself. Instead, you straightened your posture, forced yourself to stand a little bit taller. Willed yourself to have a backbone for once in your life.
“You heard me,” you said, lifting your chin in defiance. Several onlookers gasped in surprise at your rebellion. Where had this insolence come from? “I’m choosing to leave with Joel. Now, please let go of my arm.”
Behind you, Joel stood silent and still. 
Watching. Observing. Waiting.
He wanted nothing more than to intervene. Rip you out of Seth’s hands and shatter each and every last bone in all ten of his fingers for putting them on you. Had Joel not realized that this was probably the first time in your whole, entire life you’d mustered up the courage to use your voice, he would have easily given into the urge. He wanted to protect you. He needed so badly to protect you. Yet, he knew you weren’t helpless or incapable of standing on your own two feet. He knew you deserved the chance to stand up and speak for yourself after a lifetime of being silenced, a lifetime of being forced to stay in your place, seen but never heard.
“Seth, let go of my arm,” you repeated. It was no longer a polite request. It was a demand.
He scoffed. “Do you honestly think I’m going to let you leave with somebody like him? You think I’m just going to stand back and let him take advantage of you?”
Oh, you hadn’t liked that insinuation, not one bit. 
It caused something inside of you to finally give way.
Snap.
The blood in your veins boiled, ran hot enough to make you feel like you were about to burn from the inside out. “Joel isn’t taking advantage of me! It isn’t like that,” you seethed, furiously. The quiet, well mannered, obedient good girl everyone in Jackson knew was gone. And she could stay gone. In your periphery, you could see Leah elbowing her way through the sea of people to the front of the crowd with an incredulous look plastered on her face. She stood there beside Tommy, who appeared to be just as incredibly bewildered by your outburst. “Don’t treat me like I’m some child who doesn’t know any better! I’m an adult and I’m old enough to make my own choices, okay?”
For a moment, you had forgotten it was Seth standing there in front of you.
“I’m capable of making my own decisions! I don’t need you to dictate my life. I don’t need you to tell me what is and isn’t good for me—controlling what I should and shouldn’t believe in.” Your voice trembled as emotions you’d been suppressing for years bubbled their way up to the surface. Amidst the chaos, you could feel Joel squeeze your hand again, as if silently encouraging you not to lose your nerve. He was your anchor, the only person who could keep your world from capsizing. You knew he wouldn’t let you drown. Not even God, who you had always been forced to believe was your pillar of strength, had ever made you feel this protected. Safe. “I don’t need you to tell me how to live and much less when it’s the end of the world.”
It wasn’t Seth you were addressing.
It was your father.
Your father, who controlled every last thing, from what you would eat to the way that you dressed and how you wore your hair.
Your father, who refused to let you have a mind of your own, who simply could not bear the mere thought of you thinking for yourself.
Your father, whose love felt like shackles, heavy, rusted metal restraints that had been digging into the flesh of your wrists for far, far too long.
“You need to let me go now,” you said, swallowing back the lump in your throat. Once more, you caught Leah from the corner of your eye, your heart lurching in your chest when you noticed her desperately trying to wipe at her eyes with the back of her hand. She was the only person in the room who understood how you felt. Her rebelliousness only ever masked the pain of knowing her father’s love came with terms and conditions—and the fear of knowing what would happen if those terms and conditions weren’t met. For several weeks, you’d gotten a taste of what she went through everyday, how her fear of putting her foot down led her to run around in secret and live a double life. “Just let me go.”
Seth firmly shook his head. “No! I’m not letting you go anywhere with him. I don’t know what the hell he did to you, but he’s clearly got you all fucking brainwashed.”
That was fucking enough. Joel stepped in, lowering his voice as he said, “Y’know, I’ve just ‘bout lost count of how many fuckin’ times she’s asked you to let her go now and it’s really startin’ to piss me off.” Raising an eyebrow, he laid his offer out on the table. “Here’s the deal. You let go of her right now and I won’t shatter your fuckin’ jaw into pieces. That seem fair enough to you?”
“No.” Seth gripped your arm even harder, prompting you to let out a little yelp as his nails dug painfully into your skin. Though it’d been accidental and he hadn’t meant to hurt you, it didn’t matter. He’d just set off the ticking time bomb that was Joel Miller.
Furious, Joel snatched a fistful of his shirt with his free hand—the other still held yours. Gentle, despite being mere moments away from beating someone to within an inch of their life.
“Joel! Stop!” Tommy’s voice broke through the tension as he approached. His footsteps were slow—careful and cautious, as if he was afraid to make any kind of sudden movement. “Joel. Hey. C’mon now, let’s not do this, alright? Ain’t gotta handle things this way. We can talk it through. No need for anyone to wind up bleedin’ in the fuckin’ infirmary tonight, so just take a breath and let him go.”
Blatantly ignoring Tommy’s attempt to keep the peace, Joel tugged Seth forward, yanking him closer. “Listen to me and listen to me good ‘cause I ain’t gonna fuckin’ say it again. You’d best take your fuckin’ hands off her right now unless you wanna spend the rest of the night sweepin’ up your teeth off the floor of your own fuckin’ bar,” he threatened, his tone enough to send a chill up anyone’s spine, even your own.
“You wouldn’t dare, Miller.” Somehow, Seth managed to keep a straight face, but you could see it so clearly in his eyes and in the tremble of his lower lip—oh, he was terrified of Joel and rightly so. “Not in front of all these people. Not in front of your brother. That wouldn’t be a smart move considering you’re already on thin fucking ice for what you did to that boy’s face, now would it?”
Joel tugged him closer. “Test me,” he hissed through gritted teeth. “Go on. Fuckin’ test me.”
His challenge was immediately met with a pathetic look of defeat. Seth dropped your arm and he was released.
“S’what I fuckin’ thought.” Without another word to the man, Joel whirled around and roughly pulled the door open, leading the way outside. As you both descended the building’s old, creaking wooden steps, you began to shiver and he suddenly remembered he’d left his jacket behind inside the bar. He wrapped an arm around your shoulders. “C’mere, my little dove,” he murmured as he tucked you against his side for warmth. “I’ve got you.”
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The first thing he did was light the fireplace.
“Should start warmin’ you up, sweet girl,” he’d said to you over his shoulder. He tossed a log into the blaze as you sat perched on his couch rubbing your bare arms with your hands. “M’gonna go upstairs and find you a blanket, alright? You stay put.”
“Okay,” you’d mumbled, knowing there was no point in telling him not to fuss over you.
Even with the soft, fleece throw blanket he had draped around your shoulders and the warmth of the flames in front of you, you continued trembling. Subtle, but he’d noticed it, felt it when he had sat down beside you and pulled you close against his side. “Oh baby, you’re still shakin’?” That was when he realized you weren’t cold. Frowning, Joel rose to his feet and disappeared down the hallway. He came back to the living room a minute later with a glass of water in his hand. With a small, labored grunt, he dropped to one knee in front of you and held it out. “Here.”
“No, thank you.” You shook your head. “I’m not thirsty.”
“Maybe not, but I’m kinda worried you could be in a bit of shock, right now,” he stated, the creases in between his brows deepening as he observed you for any other physical signs of distress. Carefully, Joel lifted the glass to your lips, gently coaxing you to take a drink. “C’mon, darlin’. Think you can be a real good girl for me and at least take a couple sips? Hm?”
Sighing softly, you nodded and did as he asked of you, taking a small sip of water. It soothed your dry mouth and throat and you took another one. Maybe you were thirsty after all.
“Little more, now. Little more. That’s it. That’s my good girl.” Once he was satisfied with how much you’d had to drink, Joel set the half empty glass down on the oak coffee table behind him. He turned back to you, placing his large hands on either side of your thighs below the hem of your dress. He started tracing soft, soothing circles into your skin with his thumbs. “M’real proud of you for standin’ up for yourself back there, sweetheart. Took a whole lot of fuckin’ courage to do that, y’know.”
You glanced down at your hands in your lap. “Mhm.”
“Baby. Hey. Look at me.” One of his hands abandoned your leg and he reached up, delicately taking your chin between his thumb and index finger. He tilted your face upwards, his worried gaze meeting your own. “Talk to me. M’right here.”
“That—that was a lot,” you admitted meekly, shoulders sagging as the adrenaline started wearing off and your body slowly came down from the peak hormone rush. “It was a lot.”
Sighing, Joel’s hand fell away from your face. “Yeah, I know it was a lot, babygirl. I know. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have—”
“No.” You were quick to cut him off. “Don’t be sorry.”
His chest heaved with another sigh, this one deeper, heavier, bearing the weight of his guilt. “Well I am,” he said. He planted his hands on either side of you on the couch and lightly shook his head. “Didn’t even fuckin’ think twice when I pulled you outta that fuckin’ supply closet and took your hand in front of all those people. I was so fuckin’ hellbent on showin’ everybody you were mine that I didn’t even stop and think ‘bout what all it would mean for you. It was selfish of me. Real fuckin’ selfish. And I’m sorry, little dove.”
“Do you regret it?” you asked, quietly.
Joel chuckled in spite of himself. “M’pretty sure I’m the one who should be askin’ you that question, darlin’,” he remarked. “Tell me. Do you regret it? Do you regret me pullin’ you outta that closet?” He momentarily paused. There was a stutter in his heartbeat when you dropped your gaze away from his, silence your only reply. “Do you regret me takin’ your hand in front of everyone?”
Of course not.
You wanted to be his and you wanted everyone to know it. There was no regret, none. 
Still. 
The consequences that you would undoubtedly have to face in the morning were overwhelming. Daunting.
Surely, by then, your father would know about you and Joel. When he came downstairs right after sunrise and he discovered you weren’t in the kitchen helping Lydia prepare breakfast, he would question where you were and make some kind of remark about how you should not be sleeping in this late. He would tell her just how irresponsible it was for you to ignore your duties and obligations to him and the family. Sloth was one of the seven deadly sins, after all. He would make her trek upstairs and wake you, and when she did, your sister would find your bed empty.
Meanwhile, there would be a knock at the front door.
No stranger to having members of the congregation show up on his doorstep when they were in need, be it of prayer or comfort, your father would answer it only to find someone, not in need of solace, but who felt that it was their responsibility and moral obligation to inform him that they had seen his youngest daughter leaving The Tipsy Bison with Joel Miller in the middle of the night, hand in hand.
He wouldn’t believe them.
“Now, that is simply not true,” he would say, offended that anybody would have the nerve to show up at his door and accuse you of something so vile. “That’s not possible. I know my daughter and she would never do such a thing. It must have been someone else that you saw with him. Someone who looked like her, perhaps.”
Then, Lydia would descend the staircase and tell him you weren’t in your bedroom. “She must have gone up to the main street as soon as she woke up,” she would suggest with a shrug, not yet privy to the events that had taken place the night before at the party you and Leah had snuck off to. She never had to worry about you, the good one. “I did notice we were running pretty low on eggs. Sugar, too. She probably wanted to be the first in line at the pantry to—Papa? What’s the matter?”
The color would drain from your father’s face when the realization slowly sank in. No, you weren’t out on the main street picking up eggs for breakfast and sugar for his tea. You were lying up in Joel Miller’s bed—defiled, impure, and with the curse of Eve on your flesh. Even after dedicating his entire life to making sure you did not stray from the path of righteousness, he had failed. You had fallen into temptation. 
There was a chance he would have mercy on you. All you had to do was beg and plead for his forgiveness—and more importantly, for the forgiveness of God. “Vow to atone for your sins,” your father would say, his gaze fixed on the Holy Bible in his lap. He probably wouldn’t be able to look at you, not after what you had done. “Repent. And swear to me, child, that you will never so much as glance in that man’s direction ever again.”
No. That’s not what you wanted.
You wanted Joel and the freedom to be with him. 
But that freedom came with a high, high price.
You were willing to pay it, but you’d be lying if you said you were prepared to navigate the consequences. Then again, was there really any way for someone to prepare themselves to be shunned by their own father?
“I can take you home,” Joel offered quietly, the sound of his voice taking you out of the future and bringing you back into the present.
“What?”
“I can take you home,” he repeated himself. “I can take you home right now if that’s what you want, sweet girl. Won’t give you any kinda grief ‘bout it.”
Confused, all you could do was stare at him.
“Listen to me, baby. You mean a lot to me. More than I can even begin to explain,” Joel reassured you before any kind of doubt could find its way into your mind. “I want you to stay with me. There’s nothin’ on what’s left of this fuckin’ earth I want more than for you to stay here with me. But what you want matters to me a hell of a lot more than what I want.” He reached up, lightly stroking your cheek with his thumb. “If you decide you wanna go home and go back to your family—back to your old man—then that’s where I’ll take you. Okay?”
Your father would give you an ultimatum. But Joel? He was giving you a choice. And he’d respect that choice.
“I wanna free you from your cage, my little dove. But I think we both know you’ve gotta make the choice to fly outta there on your own.” He lightly swept his thumb over your quivering bottom lip, his eyes meeting yours as he whispered, “Door’s wide open for you. What you do next is all up to you.”
“I’m afraid, Joel,” you confessed. A tear slipped from the corner of your eye and rolled its way down the side of your face. He was quick to wipe it away, along with the others that followed. “I do want out of my cage. I really, really do. But I’m terrified. All I have ever known is my family and my faith. I have never been apart from my father and my sisters.”
His expression softened. “I know you’re scared. Can’t promise you things will be easy, but there is one thing I can promise you.”
“What’s that?” you questioned, then waited with baited breath.
He gingerly cupped your cheek in his large palm. “I’ve got you,” he swore to you, just like he had done so back at the bar. “If you decide to stay, I promise I’ll take real, real good care of you, alright? For the rest of my life, I’ll take care of you. You won’t ever have to worry ‘bout a thing with me by your side. Swear it on my life.”
Warmth blossomed in your heartspace and finally, you stopped trembling. Lifting a hand, you curled your fingers around his wrist as your gaze fell to his mouth. “Joel?”
“What is it, darlin’ girl?”
“Kiss me. Please.”
With a gentle nod, Joel’s other hand found your hip, the warmth of it seeping through the cotton fabric of your dress. Leaning in, he brushed his lips against yours. It was a chaste thing, soft and innocent until you grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him closer to you. “Babygirl,” he mumbled against your lips. He deepened the kiss, sweeping his tongue through your parted lips and into your mouth. He tasted like bold bourbon and citrus beer. There was a faint hint of tobacco too—you recalled him admitting to you one night in the church house that while he wasn’t all that much of a smoker, at least not like he used to be when living in the zones, he would occasionally partake in the habit if he happened to come across a pack of cigarettes while out on patrol, pairing the nicotine with a drink. He tasted delicious. He tasted delicious because he tasted like yours.
You sank back into the worn, supple brown leather of his couch, tugging him forward so he sank in with you. Over you. Releasing your near death grip on his collar, you managed to wedge your hands in between your bodies and began to claw furiously at the buttons of his shirt, your fingers shaking out of pure desperation to feel him. It wasn’t until you were halfway down that he finally noticed what you were doing and leaned back, catching both of your wrists.
“Baby, wait,” he panted, shaking his head. “Don’t think now’s a good time for that—”
“Joel, please,” you pleaded, the intense ache between your thighs almost too much for you to bear. “Please. I want it. I want you.”
“S’been a rough night for you.” Joel’s voice was hoarse—strained, like he was aching just as much, if not more. “You’re real emotional right now. Vulnerable. Last thing I want is to take advantage of you at a time like this.”
You frowned. Had Seth’s words gotten into his head?
“You’re not taking advantage of me.”
“Darlin’ I just don’t think we should—”
“Joel, please,” you begged him again. “I was so good for you, was I not? Wasn’t I patient, just like you asked me to be?”
His lips thinned into a tight line. He wouldn’t be able to resist much longer. You, his beautiful little temptress of Eden.
“I waited for so long,” you reminded him. “I’ve been so, so good for you. Please, just make me yours already. I don’t want to think about anything else right now. I just want to be with you. Please, Joel. I need you so badly it hurts.”
Christ.
No man could stand it. No man could possibly have the strength to deny you.
With a look of utter defeat, he folded. Before he could say another word or make another move, your greedy mouth was on his, and you kissed him with fervor, with urgency, as you finished the task of unbuttoning his shirt. Pushing it off of his shoulders, the corduroy fabric fell into a crumpled heap behind him, nearly knocking the glass of water off the coffee table. You broke away from him and shamelessly marveled at his mouth watering form—you admired the way miles of smooth, tanned skin stretched over his wide shoulders, broad chest and soft, soft belly. Arousal pooled between your legs and you reached out and raked your fingers down his chest, and over his stomach, going lower and lower, following the trail of coarse, dark hair that led you to his brown leather belt. You clumsily started fumbling with the brass buckle until he caught your hands once more.
“Slow down, my little dove,” he murmured. “No need to rush this. We’ve got all night.” He stood up and held his hand out to you. Time blurred a bit—maybe it was your nervousness mingled with the eager anticipation of what was to come, but there seemed to be a small gap in your memory, a blank space that spanned from the moment you rose off the couch until the moment you found yourself standing in his bedroom where you were about to answer to the call of the flesh.
Dropping your hand, Joel switched on the lamp on his bedside table and kicked off his boots before taking you into his arms. “C’mere, honey.” He nuzzled your cheek with the tip of his nose as he spoke, the scruff of his beard tickling your cheek. “Couple’a rules, sweet girl. I do somethin’ that you don’t like, you tell me. You want me to stop, you tell me to sto—”
Without waiting for him to finish his sentence, you slowly lowered yourself down onto the floor and knelt at his feet with purpose, as if kneeling before an altar, a sacred, holy space. Though you felt anxious, you were eager to worship. “I haven’t forgotten about what I said earlier tonight,” you cooed, noticing the mild look of surprise on his face. “I said I’d make it up to you and I intend on keeping my word.”
All the blood in his body rushed south to his cock and it strained painfully against the crotch of his jeans. “Baby, I—” Again, he was cut off, only this time by the sound of his own groan when your hand brushed up the front of his thigh and over his growing bulge. He glanced down, his heart thrumming painfully hard against his sternum as he watched you reach for his belt buckle.
With all your might, you willed your hands so as not to tremble. It was self-explanatory, what you were about to do, but your total lack of experience sowed seeds of doubt into your mind—you wanted to make him feel good, just like he had made you feel good outside of the church house during services. Just how you knew he would make you feel tonight.
Hand still over his buckle, you pressed the tenderest of kisses to his bulge through his jeans. Then, turning your head, you rested your cheek on one of his thick, blue denim clad thighs and peered up at him through your eyelashes with a small, nervous smile as you confessed what he already knew. “I’ve never done this before.”
Oh, how sweet and endearing you were. Joel reached down and smoothed your hair back and away from your face, tucking it behind your ear. “S’alright, honey,” he crooned, grazing the silkiness of your cheek with his index finger. “I’ll walk you through it. Teach you how to be a real good girl and suck my cock just the way I like it. That what you want, my little dove?”
His filth made your cunt clench hard around nothing.
Slowly lifting your head off of his thigh, you pulled your bottom lip between your teeth and managed a clear, consenting nod as your hands fumbled with his buckle, the clinking sound of metal ringing loudly in your ears. You undid the button on his jeans and pulled down his zipper, your throat drying when you saw the outline of him, his size intimidating even behind the cotton fabric of his faded, black boxer briefs.
With a harsh swallow, you glanced up at him, silently asking him for his permission to continue.
Such a polite little thing, Joel thought to himself. “Go on, sweetheart,” he encouraged.
You tugged his jeans down to the middle of his thighs and hooked your index fingers underneath the elastic waistband of his boxer briefs, pulling them down and freeing his cock. There was a deep, swooping sensation in your belly as you watched it slap up against the lower part of his abdomen. After many nights of sitting in his lap, feeling him through his clothes, grinding your cunt down onto him, you thought you’d at the very least had an idea of what you would be in for, but oh, how wrong you had been. He was so much bigger than you could have imagined, and your stomach swooped again when you realized he was not going to fit. Anywhere.
Licking away the dryness of your lips, you take him in one of your hands, feeling the heaviness of his length in your palm. He was so long and so, so thick.
“Oh fuck,” Joel hissed the curse through gritted teeth, his hips jerking forward involuntarily as your touch sent a charged jolt of electricity shooting up the length of his spine. He looked down at you, his pupils blown wide with arousal. Christ. You hadn’t even done anything to him yet, but seeing you sitting so prettily at his feet was almost enough to make him come on the spot.
Delicately wrapping your hand around him, you found yourself almost in awe at the way your fingertips barely, just barely, touched. The sheer size of his cock dwarfed your hand, and made it seem so much smaller than it really was.
“You’re so big,” you murmured, echoing your thoughts. You licked at your lips again, suddenly feeling ravenous, an appetite that had seemingly come out of nowhere making you salivate. The tip of him was flushed red, slit already glistening—how badly you wanted, needed a taste. Never, ever, did you think you would be down on your knees for anything but prayer, but there you were, starved and desperate to bite into the forbidden fruit.
“What’re you waitin’ for, darlin’ girl?” he croaked.
“Permission,” you replied, sweetly.
“Go right ahead, baby. S’all yours—I’m all yours.”
Yours.
Yours, yours, yours.
Finding your first push of courage, you leaned forward and so carefully swept your tongue along the tip of his length, collecting the slight saltiness leaking from the slit and getting your first delectable taste. With your hand still wrapped firmly around his base, you looked up, your eyes locked on Joel’s face as you flicked your tongue up against the rigid underside of his cock.
“Fuckin’ Christ,” Joel groaned, all of the muscles in his stomach already pulling taut when he felt you dragging your tongue in a slow, purposeful lick along the length of him. “Babygirl.”
“Is that good?” you asked him, sounding hopeful. “Am I doing good?”
“Doin’ so, so fuckin’ good for me, sweetheart. Look so fuckin’ pretty down on your knees for me.”
Pleased, you wrapped your mouth around the head of his length, pressing forward and taking him in as far as you possibly could—which, in all fairness, wasn’t very far. At least not as far as you would have liked. Another groan tore itself from the depths of his chest as your plush, plump lips sealed around him, your tongue warm and wet on the underside of his cock. Moving both of your hands to rest on the sides of his thighs, you began to move your head back and forth, following what felt most natural to you. The nerves you initially felt slowly but surely dissipated, vanishing one by one with every curse, every tremble, every sharp breath.
Joel resisted the urge to buck his hips forward, fought the desire to feel himself at the back of your throat. He needed to be gentle, so careful with such an innocent, pliant thing who had much, much to learn. “Sweet little fuckin’ mouth feels so good around my cock, baby, just like I fuckin’ knew it would. Y’think it can take more of me, little dove? Hm?”
You hummed, the vibration intensifying his pleasure.
“Yeah? Y’trust me?”
Your reply came in the form of a muffled, “Mhm.”
Joel reached down and cradled the back of your head in the palm of his hand. He carefully guided you further onto his throbbing length, slowly feeding you one inch at a time. Your fingers dug into the denim of his jeans. He was much more than a mouthful for you, and you could only take about half of him before he hit the back of your throat, prompting you to gag around him. Drool dribbled out from the corners of your mouth and down the sides your chin, dripping onto your lap.
“Oh fuck, sweetheart. Yeah, that’s it. Little more now, honey,” Joel encouraged. He bucked his hips forward, his head slipping further down your throat. Just when you felt like you were about to choke, he pulled out and you tried your hardest not to cough and sputter as you took in a much needed, precious breath of air. He gave you a few seconds or so to finish catching your breath as he shoved his jeans and boxer briefs further down his legs. He stepped out of the articles of clothing and kicked them somewhere off to the aside, standing before you completely bare. “Open up.”
Your absolute devotion to him bred sweet submission, so as worried as you were that you wouldn’t be able to handle it, you nodded obediently and very willingly did as you were told. 
He guided himself right back into your waiting mouth, pressing deeply. You tried to relax your jaw, reminding yourself to breathe in and out through your nose. Tears streamed down the sides of your face as you did your best to forestall another gag. “Little bit more,” he said, thrusting his hips in a slow, steady controlled rhythm. He advanced even further into your mouth—trusting he wouldn’t suffocate you, nor push you too far past your limits, you opened up wider. He moaned, “Yeah, baby. That’s my good girl. That’s my good fuckin’ girl.”
With a bit of newfound confidence, you hollowed your cheeks and sucked him. You swiped your tongue along the thick, prominent vein on the underside of his cock, earning yourself more of his sweet, sweet praise.
“Fuck, yeah, suck me off, sweetheart. This pretty little mouth was fuckin’ made for sin,” he breathed, guiding your head back and forth with a firm, but gentle hand.
You moaned, the noise muffled around his length. Slick soaked through your panties and coated the insides of your thighs. With another moan, you tightly squeezed your legs together, inwardly reminding yourself that patience was a virtue.
Noticing the way you had shifted, Joel moved his hand from the back of your head, lightly curling his fingers around your jaw. He pulled you off of his cock, a loud, lewd popping sound bouncing off the sage green walls of his bedroom. “C’mere, baby.” He grabbed your arms, effortlessly hoisting you up to your feet.
“What’s wrong?” you questioned him worriedly. “Did I do something wrong?”
Chuckling softly, he brushed a finger along the strap of your dress. You could do no wrong, his perfect, perfect girl. “Of course not, sweet girl. You did so fuckin’ good for me,” Joel reassured you, lightly tracing along your collarbone with his finger and making your flesh erupt in goosebumps. He leaned forward and feathered a kiss onto your lips, murmuring against them, “Are you wet, little dove?”
Before you could even process the query and generate some kind of coherent response, he dove his opposite hand between your thighs, cupping your warm heat in his palm. At this, your weak knees buckled, prompting you to reach out and grab onto his arms to hold steady and keep yourself from falling into a helpless heap on the floor.
“Oh, honey. You’re soaked. That what sucking my cock does to you?” he cooed. He peppered another kiss, this one onto the corner of your mouth. His voice lowered another octave. “Poor little thing. She needs me, don’t she? Needs me to take care of her?”
You whimpered. “Yes.”
“Manners, babygirl,” he reminded you, skimming your cheek with his nose. “Yes, what?”
“Yes, please.”
Humming in approval, Joel withdrew his hand from in between your legs and guided you backwards towards his bed. “Sit,” he commanded gently, bidding you to let go of him. “Arms up.”
Reaching for the hem of your dress, he took great care in pulling it over your head, then discarded the vibrant yellow material over his shoulder, leaving you in nothing but your cowboy boots and thin, cotton white panties. Without a word, he knelt before you and pulled off one boot, and then the other, setting them both aside. He hooked two fingers underneath the elastic waistband of your underwear, coaxing you to lift your bottom off of the bed, just long enough for him to pull them down and slide them down your legs. He was so tender in the manner in which he undressed you.
“Fuckin’ beautiful, beautiful girl,” Joel praised. His dark gaze dragged down the length of your body as you sat before him wearing nothing but the delicate, gold chain around your neck. The holy cross nestled between your supple breasts gleamed in the light of the lamp on the nightstand. He would leave it on until your decision was made, set in stone. “My pretty little dove.”
“Joel.” You whimpered his name, hands curling around fistfuls of his dark blue sheets. You were drenched now, in dire need of some relief. If he didn’t touch you where you needed him most, you would surely lose your mind.
Desperate, you leaned back slightly onto his bed and parted your knees, your folds glistening as you showed him just how badly you needed him.
Joel groaned, almost visibly salivating at the sight. The blazing heat in his eyes sent ripples of desire coursing through your body, straight to your throbbing core.
You opened wider. “Please.”
“Christ, babygirl. Already soakin’ the sheets.” Sliding a finger up along the seam of your pussy, he grazed your clit, the touch light, but somehow still enough to make your hips arch off the mattress as white-hot pinpricks of pleasure danced their way up your spine. He lowered his head and leaned in, your sweet scent drawing him in like a moth to a flame. Just when you were about to start pleading him for more, he dipped his face into the apex of your thighs, his mouth finally, finally, meeting your wet heat.
“Oh!” you gasped, your head falling back. “Fuck!”
Against you, his lips curled upwards into a wicked grin. He’d never heard you curse before, not until now.
Joel took his time devouring you, savoring the essence of your cunt with each broad stroke of his tongue. Sealing his lips around your clit, he flicked the swollen, sensitive bundle of nerves over and over again, eliciting from you some of the sweetest noises that he had ever heard in his entire life. In preparation for what you both knew was to come, he pushed one finger inside of you, the invasion causing you to fist his sheets even harder. He then slipped in a second finger, groaning in sheer, carnal bliss at how your walls squeezed them, at the mere thought of them squeezing his cock in the same manner. How was it that you felt so much tighter this time around?
“Oh God.”
You shouldn’t be saying His name. Not like this.
Not when something this sinful was being done to you.
Hungrily, Joel lapped at you, curling both of his fingers in an upwards motion to hit the perfect spot. He knew you were close, felt it in the way that you squirmed and writhed. Draping his arm across your hips, he pinned them down onto the bed, holding you still as he chased your high as if it were his own.
“Joel,” you chanted his name over and over again in a fevered prayer. Releasing the sheets, your hands found his hair, tangling themselves in his curls. Your head fell back, and you cursed at the ceiling of his bedroom. “Fuck, fuck, fuck Joel—”
Pushing onto his mouth, you came, moaning his name so loudly you were certain the whole neighborhood was getting an earful.
Joel pulled back, his beard and mustache slicked with your spend. “S’right, honey,” he crooned, his digits still buried to the knuckle as he helped you to ride out your wave of ecstasy. Eventually, when he pulled them out, you tried closing your shaking legs. He tsked and shook his head, wrenching them open further. “No, no, baby. Keep those pretty thighs open for me. Wanna see her.” He admired his work, his cock twitching at the sight of your pussy, swollen and shining, and ready to take him.
Like earlier, there was another brief skip in time.
Mind still in a haze, you hadn’t even realized that he’d risen to his feet and guided you further up onto his bed, not until you were lying on your back with your head on his pillow and he was hovering over you, his hard length brushing against one of your messy, inner thighs when he settled himself between your legs. 
Your heart began to pound in a mingle of both fear and excitement.
Joel’s eyes met yours. His pupils were blown so wide, there was not one, single trace of brown anywhere to be seen. “Y’absolutely sure about this, little dove?”
Your response came without hesitation. “Yes. I’m sure.”
He pressed a kiss to the underside of your jaw. Your submission was a gift, and he would cherish every last second of your surrender to him, savor it for as long as he possibly could. His lips, soft and warm, skimmed along the column of your throat, leaving a trail of fresh goosebumps in their wake.
If, by some chance, you decided that you wanted to go back to your father and to your faith, Joel didn’t know how he would find it in himself to let you go, not after this. Of course, he would have to let go, though.
The last thing he wanted was to help free you from one cage just to stick you right back into another. While he was no stranger to loss, he had to admit to himself that to lose you would be a knife to whatever was left of his heart.
Shoving the thought out of his mind, he reached down and gripped the base of his cock, pumping it in his fist before running the leaking head along your puffy lips, coating himself in your wetness with the hope it would ease some of the pain you were bound to feel. “Ready, babygirl?” he asked you, lightly teasing your entrance. “Might hurt a bit. M’gonna go slow. Just need you to relax for me, alright?”
“Okay.”
“I’ve got you,” he promised.
You nodded, saying softly, “I know.”
Though he knew he had all of your trust, Joel could still sense your anxiousness. He reached out for your hand, lacing your fingers together with his own as he gingerly pressed forward and eased himself into you, taking the very innocence you had been taught your entire life to preserve, one slow, careful inch at a time.
“Oh—Joel!” You cried loudly at the initial stretch, your pretty face scrunching in discomfort. Tightly slamming your eyes shut, sparks flew behind your eyelids when he finally bottomed out. The burning sting in between your thighs was too overwhelming, almost impossible to cope with. He felt so enormous within you, you could have sworn he was in your belly. Another broken cry fell from your lips and he swallowed it with a comforting kiss.
“Jesus Christ,” he hissed against your lips, a thin sheen of sweat coating his brow, neck, and chest. He wasn’t sure where he found the strength, but he suppressed his urge to thrust. Instead, he dropped his face into the hollow of your neck and waited, giving you the chance to adjust to him. He mumbled against your skin. “Doin’ so good for me, sweet girl. Y’know that? You’re doin’ so fuckin’ good for me.”
Even in discomfort, you preened at his praise.
He squeezed your hand, and after a minute, he gave an experimental thrust of his hips—and then another and another before he ceased his movement once again. He was so big and you were so deliciously full of him.
Eventually, the pain subsided, and you found yourself asking, no, begging for more. “Move.” Your other hand found itself cupping the side of his face, coaxing him to lift his head and allowing your gazes to meet. Your soft, plush thighs parted further to help accommodate the breadth of his hips. “Please, Joel. I need you to move—I need you to fuck me.”
Surely, you would be the death of him.
He drew his hips back with cautious, tender care, then advanced in the same manner to fill your precious cunt all over again. He did it over and over, your pleasured moans encouraging him to begin picking up the pace. He drove his cock in and out of your weeping pussy, the slapping of flesh against flesh, the lewd, wet squelch of you around him inspiring him to fuck you harder, faster. And the noises you were making?
There was something oh so beautiful about your cries, sweet raptures of submission as you laid there beneath him, all too graciously taking everything he had to give you like the good, good, good girl you were for him.
“Fuckin’ hell, sweetheart,” Joel rasped. “Look at you—look at the way you take my fuckin’ cock, honey.”
And you did.
Glancing down, your gaze fell between your bodies and you watched in awe, openly marveled at the way Joel slid in and out of your cunt, how he knocked hard so deeply inside of you, driving himself as far as he could possibly go.
“Fuck Joel, I’m gonna—” You tried warning him as the pressure in your belly neared its peak, but you tumbled over the edge before you even had the chance to finish your sentence. Arching up off off the bed, you pressed your chest against his, your fingers squeezing his own so hard you feared you might break them.
“That’s it babygirl, let go,” he grunted, speeding up his thrusts. “Squeeze my fuckin’ cock—just like that. Good girl. My perfect, perfect girl.”
You didn’t quite get the chance to let the praise sink in.
Joel pulled himself out of you, and with ease, he flipped you over onto your belly. His hands gripped your hips and pulled them up off the mattress, his fingers moving to firmly knead the fleshiest part of your ass. He leaned over you, the head of his cock nudging at your hole. “Y’think you can handle a little bit more, sweetheart?” he whispered the question into a tumble of messy hair, the delicate scent of the lavender shampoo you used to wash it filling his senses. “Answer me, little dove.”
“Yes,” you replied breathlessly with a nod. “I can.”
With a satisfied hum, Joel sank into you, this second stretch not quite as overwhelming at the first, but still intense. “Relax,” he murmured, hunching further over your quivering back. He pressed a kiss onto the top of your head and then leaned down to brace his hands on either side of you. “Need you to be sweet for me just a bit longer, okay, baby?”
“God,” you whimpered when the heaviness of his balls came to rest on your sensitive clit.
It was the second time you’d uttered His name.
Joel almost grinned at the irony. He found his rhythm, groaning in gut-deep satisfaction with each snap of his hips—each smooth stroke in and each smooth stroke out.
“Oh fuck, sweet girl.” Heaven was indeed a real place, and Joel Miller was buried in it to the hilt, right at this very moment.
He was getting closer and closer.
Maybe it was your eagerness to help him reach his own release mingled with the pride you knew you would feel once you did that gave you a second wind, a fresh, new burst of energy. You planted your hands firmly on his pillow. Rolling your bottom lip between your teeth, you curved your spine and pushed back onto Joel with purpose, meeting his thrusts halfway as you rode his aching length to the satiation that waited for him at the end.
“There’s my girl,” he rasped. “Oh fuckin’ Christ—”
No way he could live his life without you now.
He needed you.
He needed you so much more than you needed him.
Joel slipped an arm around your shoulders, across your chest.
“Oh!” you gasped as he then yanked you back, pulling you flush against him. The rough crash of your back against his chest, combined with the angle in which he was fucking you knocked the wind out of your lungs.
His lips were at the shell of your ear. “Stay,” he panted, his breath hot against your cheekbone. He wrapped his other hand lightly around your throat. Relentless, were his hips now—his movements had become frantic. Desperate. “Stay with me, baby.”
Even as you fought to catch your breath in the position he had you in, you picked up on the fact that he wasn’t asking you of it, nor was he demanding you of it.
He was begging you.
Him, the most feared man in this town. Begging you?
“Joel,” you choked.
“Please, my little dove,” he pleaded, turning your head towards him. His mouth was then on the corner of your own, his beard roughly scratching the soft and delicate flesh of your cheek. “I need you, babygirl. Stay with me. Please, just fuckin’ stay with me.”
Your hands curled around his wrists. “Yes, I’ll stay,” you moaned. “I’m yours, Joel. I’m all yours. I—I’m not going anywhere. I promise. I’ll stay with you.”
A low, guttural sound rumbled through his chest. Joel firmly took hold of your cross, and without so much as a warning, he ripped the chain from around your neck and tossed it somewhere over his shoulder. He heard it land on the hardwood floor with the tiniest, faint clink the moment he spilled into you, ropes of warm release coating your fluttering walls. Curses and groans spilled from his lips and into your neck. Your cunt clutched at his pulsing cock, greedy for every last drop of his spend she could get.  
Once you were filled, you both collapsed beside each other on the bed, heaving to catch a steady breath.
“Y’okay, sweetheart?” Joel managed to ask, his chest still rising and falling rapidly.
Exhausted, all you could do was nod and utter, “Mhm.”
He exhaled an amused huff through his nose. “C’mere.” He reached for you and pulled you against his side. He draped an arm around your shoulders, holding you as close to him as was possible. “Y’did so good, honey.”
Your mouth curled into a small, contented smile.
Several minutes had passed by, and despite telling him that you were too tired to even think about moving, Joel made you get up and use the bathroom, and while you did so, he ran a clean washcloth under warm water. “Here, darlin’. Let me clean you up,” he’d said, his lips meeting your forehead in a loving token of affection before he sank down onto one knee and ran the damp cloth along the insides of your thighs. He took extreme care when he wiped at your swollen folds, knowing you were still sensitive to the touch. “There we go. All done, now.”
Not long after, you were both back in his bed, wrapped up in his sheets.
Yawning, you nuzzled into bare his chest, your eyelids feeling heavier and heavier with each and every second that ticked by. You’d started drifting off when you heard his voice.
“Baby?”
“Hmm?” you answered sleepily, eyes still closed.
“Did you mean what you said?”
“Mean what, Joel?”
There was a brief pause. “Y’know, when you said you’d stay with me.”
Snuggling closer to him, you mumbled, “Mhm. Of course I did.”
“S’not gonna be easy,” Joel murmured into your hair.
“I know.” You yawned. “But I have you.”
“You do. You’ve got me—and I’ve got you, babygirl.”
“Mm. I know that too, Joel.”
You felt him kiss the top of your head and then fell fast asleep in his arms.
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The sun bloomed over the Grand Tetons.
Your father would wake soon, that’s to say if he wasn’t up already.
The nerves began to set in.
Joel must have sensed it. “Breathe, baby. S’gonna be okay,” he soothed, squeezing your hand.
With one of his warmer, heavier jackets that normally didn’t see the light of day until winter season draped around your shoulders, the two of you made your way down the road and towards your house. Or better said, towards your father’s house. Because after what you were about to do, that yellow and white cottage would no longer be a place you could call home.
He led you up to the porch. “Y’sure you don’t want me to go in there with you?” he asked, quietly.
You could have laughed. You almost did.
“Do you believe that to be a wise choice?”
“No, I reckon it ain’t the best idea,” Joel admitted with a sigh, raking his free hand through his unkempt, salt and pepper hair. He looked up at the house, then back at you. “Look, little dove. No matter what happens in there, just know that everythin’ will be alright. M’gonna take care of you. For the rest of my life, I’ll take care of you. I’ll try my hardest to be everythin’ you need.”
“You already are, Joel,” you said, your gaze earnest.
His chest swelled with warmth.
Truth be told, Joel didn’t know how he had managed to defy the odds—how he, of all people, had managed to make his way into that sweet, innocent, beautiful little heart of yours, but somehow he did, and he would not take this responsibility lightly.
He brushed your lips with his and promised, “Gonna be waitin’ right here, okay?”
“Okay.” Inhaling deeply, you willed yourself to let go of his hand and took a step back. You then started up the porch steps on wobbling legs. When you made it to the top, you glanced over your shoulder at Joel, who gave you a subtle nod of encouragement. Exhaling slowly, you reached for the knob with trembling fingers and turned it, opening the door. You stepped inside, your heart dropping into your stomach when you saw your father sitting there at the foot of the staircase, as if he’d been waiting for you. He had been waiting for you. Fully dressed, he sat on the second to last step with both hands folded on his bible in his lap, a rosary clutched between them. “Papa?”
He said nothing. Instead, he silently observed you—his eyes glazed over the men’s jacket and the short dress you were underneath it, the disheveled, loose hair and kiss swollen lips. Your holy cross nowhere to be seen.
“Papa.” You swallowed harshly and shifted your weight anxiously from the heel of one boot to the other. “We, um—we really need to have a talk.”
He peered around you, catching a brief glimpse of the man standing outside, waiting for you at the foot of the porch.
He cleared his throat, lightly. “Yes, child. I suppose that we do.”
Nodding tightly, you turned around and slowly closed the door. Joel’s words rang in your mind over and over, giving you the push of strength you knew you would need.
I’ve got you.
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divider credit goes to @saradika 🤍
1K notes · View notes
slightlymore · 7 months
Text
deadly kiss
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chief architect jaehyun x chief engineer fem reader
genre: office au, enemies? to lovers, dom x dom and trying to force each other to sub, romance, smut, fluff
warnings: +18, alcohol, language, explicit sexual content, oral fem receiving, fingering, random sir kink because i was horny like that, use of pet name baby for her during sex, gagging on fingers and sucking, light choking, raw, sex in office, creampie. 
words: 12k+
have this little something as I warm up back into writing. it was supposed to be longer and with some angst but it has been in my drafts for monthssss and I was sick of it ehaheah enjoy. if some of these things happened to me irl no they didnt :) 
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Present, Monday 2 after the Kiss
That morning you woke up feeling the best you have felt in a hot minute. The sun was shining, the outfit you prepared looked good, you had no trouble putting on makeup that day and your hair looked great. Nothing could have disrupted such a holy morning.
Well, besides a pile of A3 papers on your desk. 
The sigh that escaped your chest as you stepped into your office sounded so defeated that your colleagues turned around in their wheeled chairs to check if you were okay. 
It’s not like you hated to have piles of paper on your desk. That was your job after all. 
It was the owner of those papers that made you roll your eyes so far back in your head that you saw green stars. 
“Can you kindly check these and confirm they’re okay? JJ :)” 
You stared at that yellow Post-it on top of the pile and the smiley face as if they committed a crime.  
“I don’t think you architects have any conception of math or physics,” you said, placing the papers on Jaehyun's desk maybe a bit too harshly. 
The man looked down at them with open palms then he prepared his cocky smile before lifting his eyes to look at you. 
He took his time with that: starting from the waist, going up slowly, shamelessly going over your breasts and finally face. 
"Hi," he tilted his head to one side and rested two fingers on his cheek. 
You rolled your eyes. 
"That project is halfway fucked," you explained, indicating the papers with your chin. 
Jaehyun's expression changed to a fake frown, going as far as giving you a little pout. "Oh, we can't allow that. Projects deserve to be fucked until the end. Just like yo-" 
You interrupted. "I swear if you continue that phrase, Jeong-" 
"Then what?" he interrupted you as well.
His eyes were dark. Eyelids low. But they were sparkling. 
You wouldn’t get intimidated. "I'll get you fired,” you said.
He chuckled. “That’s not what you said last weekend.” 
That’s right. It was all your fault. You’ve been bearing the heaviness of that fault for a few days now, in silence, and Jaehyun was just trying to make it even more difficult.
You leaned down slowly, looking around with circumscription but none of his crazy architect colleagues were paying attention to you two. If usually they’d be drinking champagne at 11 am discussing a building that breaks every law of gravity, they were weirdly dead inside that day. The project was probably kicking their ass too. 
Jaehyun stared at your cleavage underneath the dangling necklace you had around your neck before looking back up into your furious eyes. 
“Only because we made the mistake of kissing while drunk that Friday night, it doesn’t mean you can be unprofessional. Do you understand me?” 
The man’s eyes flickered and his cocky expression didn’t leave his pretty features. But he nodded once. “Yes, ma’am.” 
You straightened your back and cleared your voice, ignoring how that reply made your stomach churn. You blamed it on rage. Hearing his deep voice so up close made you irrationally mad. 
“Look again at that proposal of yours and the adjustments I made. I can give you a physics crash course if you need it.” 
“Really? Would you?” 
“I was being sarcastic. Do you think engineers in this place have time to babysit you little artsy people?” 
“Maybe I can give you something back for the effort?” 
You scoffed and crossed your arms, expecting some usual Jeong Jaehyun bullshit, like ‘a kiss’, ‘a date’, ‘my cock’. But he stood up and pulled down his dress pants on the thighs before getting the papers you gave him back and stacking them well together. 
“Like some artistic eye since you clearly lack that,” he said. 
You felt your jaw tighten at the insinuation. 
He got closer, his lips almost touching your ear. “There’s no need to be rude to me only because you think I’m attractive,” he lowered his voice, the little smirk never leaving his face. “I can play this game too.” 
You opened your mouth to reply but the swoosh he created by walking away made your hair get into it. 
“Thank you for the review,” he added already a few meters away. 
────────────
“It’s a theme park.” 
You licked your lips with furrowed eyes, your tongue still faintly tasting the hair conditioner. The meeting of the day was to announce the new project the firm was about to take on. One of the many you've been going crazy over lately. Of course, you had to be the one to take notes that day. You enjoyed the fair share of responsibilities your company had, but sometimes you really missed having a little secretary to do the little jobs for you. 
You sighed as your nails tapping on the keyboards accompanied the voice of the speaker. 
“There will be a few main rides we’ll be responsible for. Our engineers are great and I have huge trust in you all. For this task, you’ll have to work with the architecture team though.” 
Your typing stopped. A few of your colleagues murmured. Engineers were usually complete individuals. They could build rides for a theme park themselves with no need from the weirdos of the other office. They usually needed the engineers, never the opposite. 
“I think we’re capable of working on this on our own, sir,” you said.
The man sighed as if he expected the resistance. 
“This is just to ensure the theme park will also be-” he hesitated, “pretty.” 
The murmurs got louder. 
“Sir, you’ve seen my portfolio,” someone argued. 
“I designed a theme park on my own for my final university project and last year I-” somebody else added. 
The man lifted his palms like a tired father. “I know, I know. And your work is ideal. It is, however, very boring. Ugly colours. Mechanical innovation, yes. Is it interesting to look at? No. You’ll work with the architects. Meeting closed.” 
────────────
Jaehyun didn’t have to ask anyone why you all were mad as fuck after exiting the meeting hall. The rumour of the firm taking onto the project of a theme park has been whispered around in the CEO’s office for a few days now and he was lucky to have a charming personality and become friends with him. From the look on your face, you didn’t know and Jaehyun would have wanted to stop you and ask if you also wanted a coffee, maybe clown you a bit, but he didn’t manage to. He brought the white cup to his lips instead and blew the steam, going back with his mind to the Friday night, when you were doing the same. 
────────────
Past, 2 weeks ago, the Kiss day
“Coffee so late at night?” Jaehyun asked, getting closer to the drinks table. You were resting your red-wrapped hips on it, looking bored. 
“I had too much to drink already. Trying to sober up,” you replied and your voice came so muffled that Jaehyun had to stop and look at your face. 
You weren’t bored. 
You were completely drunk. Absolutely shit-faced. 
That wasn’t the most surprising part though. Everyone was drunk at that office party. Jaehyun himself was feeling too lightheaded for his liking. It was something else. 
“Are you acting cute right now?” he asked with a mix of shock and amusement. 
Your lips were pouty on the brim of the cup you were holding. You shook your head. 
Then you tried to take another sip from the steamy coffee but your wavering hand missed your mouth and the dark liquid slowly descended from your chin towards your chest instead. 
“Shit,” you looked down at your dress.
“God, are you okay?” Jaehyun was quick to grab a napkin. “Did you burn yourself?” 
He took the cup from your hands and put it on the table behind you before gently tapping away at your neck. 
“No, it was just warm,” you assured him. “It’s very sticky though. Poured too much sugar. I’ll go wash up,” you announced and placed your palms on his chest to gently push him away from your path. Jaehyun watched your back as you tried to walk towards the corridor but the way you were dangling to one side and then the other in your high heels made his anxiety go through the roof. 
“Wait, I’ll help you,” he wrapped your shoulders with one arm. 
You hummed as if appreciative and Jaehyun blinked a few times, squinting then relaxing his eyes to try and read all the signboards and see where the hell the bathroom was on that floor. He was also almost shitfaced from the suspicious wine the office brought, but also, he forgot his glasses home that day. 
What a couple of losers you two were. 
“Listen, I think we need to go down a few floors. I have no idea where the hell the bathroom is here.” 
You hummed again and leaned with all of your weight against Jaehyun’s chest. Your eyes were closed as if about to fall asleep. 
Jaehyun sighed, a little sarcastic “great” huffing from his chest. He let his arm fall from your shoulders to your waist for better support and he hit the lift button with his knuckles. It was fortunately already there and Jaehyun had to half drag you and half push you inside of it. For a moment he felt relieved, but then your weight pushed him against the wall and he had to wrap his arms around you again to not make you slide down. 
“Can you just hold yourself up for a second?” he felt irritated. 
But his expression relaxed as you lifted your face. Your half-closed eyes and open lips made him gulp.
“Can you smile for once? I really like your dimples,” you replied and poked one of his cheeks. 
Jaehyun was flabbergasted. The stuck-up, boring, and work-obsessed chief engineer was poking his cheek while her coffee-shined tits were pressed against his tie?  He felt like seeing you for the first time. 
“Ah, come on!” you added, grabbing his face with your hands and making him pout. “You never smile.” 
“I smile a lot, you just never look at me,” he tried to speak while your thumb was digging into his cheek. Unfortunately, he thought, but he kept that to himself. 
You tried to say something else but the ding of the elevator made Jaehyun look towards the opening doors towards a dark corridor. You turned his face towards you again and leaning in, you pressed a chaste kiss on his plump pink lips. 
Jaehyun’s eyes widened and although drunk, you looked surprised as well. “Shit, sorry,” you tried to take a step back but Jaehyun’s palms on your waist didn’t let you go. 
He slid one hand on your neck, right below the ear and pulled your face back to meet his lips again. You hummed, closing your eyes and firstly grabbed at his jacket before you finally decided to wrap his neck with your arms and abandon yourself in the kiss. Your lips tasted like sweet coffee and Jaehyun hoped it could sober him up as well because he felt suddenly very dizzy. And when you slid your tongue inside his mouth he almost moaned, letting his palms caress your spine before groping at your soft ass. Your body got even closer to his and he had to move just once to pin you against the elevator wall. You grunted and Jaehyun wondered if he pushed into you too harshly, but then you kissed him again as if you could not get enough and he relaxed, welcoming the leg you lifted on his hip. Your skin felt soft under his fingertips and it felt even softer under his lips as he started to kiss your jaw, going down your neck following the coffee trail and cleaning it up with his tongue until it reached the chest. Your eyes were closed and your hands in his hair were making his half-hard cock throb too much. With an enormous almost inhuman force he stopped, hands resting on both sides of your head, chest lifting and falling quickly. Your sensual gaze made him gulp and when you talked, he could barely hear it. 
“What?” 
“I said, what department are you from? Sales?” 
“I’m an architect. Jeong Jaehyun?” 
Your face fell so fast that Jaehyun had to take a small step back. 
“God,” you furrowed your eyebrows, “not an architect.” 
Jaehyun had to remain still for a few minutes after you left to process the whole situation. 
────────────
Past, Monday 1 after the Kiss
Monday morning came quicker than you expected and with it the memories of Jeong Jaehyun the architect’s tongue inside your mouth. The elevator you were taking was the same and with the corner of your eye, you could exactly pinpoint where he pushed you against the wall to give you the best make-out session of your whole life. You shuddered and looked away. You psyched yourself to forget everything the whole weekend, or at least, to stop worrying about it, but it was very hard when you knew you would end up seeing him at work. You tried to drink from the cup you were holding but the taste of coffee made your brain buzz with the memory of Jaehyun licking up the sweet and bitter liquid from the swell of your breasts as if he was doing it at that moment too. 
You really drunkenly kissed a coworker? An architect? Your university friends would probably laugh at you for the rest of their lives. 
You didn’t know much about him so you hoped that by not seeing him often every embarrassment would soon die out. 
But apparently, he knew a lot about you. 
The shoes you chose that day were flat and comfortable and you were quick to reach your desk and sit down, avoiding everyone that might have seen something. 
Clearing your throat you turned on your computer right before a shadow in the shape of a man could obscure the keyboard. 
You looked up and Jaehyun smiled politely, the head to the side like a little bird. 
“Good morning,” his voice was deep. 
You opened your mouth and you felt your glasses slide down your nose. “Good morning?” 
The man blinked at you for a moment as if waiting for something. “Well?” 
You slowly looked around, darting your gaze across the room to understand what the hell was going on. Was he there to talk about the kiss? Was he a little boy who thought you were dating? Did you promise something? Did you offend him and he was waiting for an apology?
“Do you need something?” you pushed your glasses back and gulped at his sudden chuckle. 
“Yes. The projects for today,” he replied with both hands politely extended towards you. 
“Huh?” 
You took in the view of the man talking to you. Wasn’t Jeong Jaehyun the architect dude with sick tongue skills, and that’s it? Why was he talking to you as if he knew you? 
Then you felt as if the gods themselves hit you in the back of your head. 
“You’re-” you covered your mouth with the fingers, “you’re Jisung?” 
The man’s smile disappeared to make space for confusion. He furrowed his eyebrows while thinking about what he could reply to that. 
“You do call me a different J name every time so, I guess that’s technically true for you.” 
You took off your glasses because you were afraid the sudden heat wave to your cheeks and chest could melt them off. 
“I thought you were-,” you started, “I thought you were some assistant. You’re the Architect team chief Jeong Jaehyun? The man that I kis-”, you stopped yourself. 
Jaehyun couldn’t conceal a sudden chuckle but you also saw the shadow of annoyance in his dark eyes. 
“You had no idea who I was all of this time we worked together? We talk all mornings and you hand me the projects.” 
You were too stunned to speak. 
“We’ve been doing this for months now,” he added. 
You felt your mouth dry. 
Jaehyun scoffed and placed his hands on your desk, leaning down as if having a secret to share. 
You gulped and looked around but no one paid you any mind. 
“You need Architects to make out with you for you to remember their name and face?” 
His whisper made your skin shiver and while you were previously looking at his eyes, you had to stare at his necktie instead after that phrase. 
“Why do you keep coming to my office? You have nothing else to do? Send some assistant over from now on,” you blabbed. 
Jaehyun straightened his back. 
“Okay.” 
You nodded as if you just somehow resolved that embarrassing issue. 
“You’ll come to my office starting tomorrow and hand me the projects instead.” 
“What?” your voice was louder than you expected and a few heads turned around. 
Jaehyun’s lips stretched in a lazy and cocky smile. “I’ll get them. For today,” he grabbed the pile of papers from your desk. “Thank you.” 
His back looked huge as he turned around and exited the office. 
────────────
Jaehyun was fuming. 
He threw the papers on his desk with such violence that two poor interns jumped in place with their little coffees. 
“Everything is under control. Go back to work and mind your business,” he barked at them. 
He forgot he styled his hair that morning and when he tried to pass one hand through the fringe his fingers got stuck in the wax. 
“For fuck’s sake,” he sat down and unbuttoned his sleeves instead, rolling them up. 
You really had no idea who he was. 
He was shocked, embarrassed, and so fucking offended. 
No, he felt humiliated. 
All of those mornings of him longing- no. He would not admit that to himself. All of those mornings of him working with you and you couldn’t even remember his name, let alone his face. 
Was everyone just a nameless and faceless pawn around you? He has never seen a more arrogant and rude person in his whole life. 
And the fact he was still burning with desire for such a conceited woman was driving him insane with rage. 
────────────
Your fingers were a bit trembling after Jaehyun left. That was possibly the most embarrassing experience of your entire existence. 
You rested your forehead on your palms and waited for a few minutes to see if you could get your shit together and start working. 
And you kissed. For fuck’s sake. 
The mewl that escaped your lips caught the attention of some fellow engineers who were kind enough to stop and ask if you had some sort of stomach ache. 
You lifted your head to look at them in the eyes and you realized you had no idea who these people were. 
Your parents have always told you to stop overworking yourself and start having a bit of fun too, especially in school. It shouldn’t have been such a huge issue, but realizing you made zero close friends or even acquaintances because you’ve been staring at your desk and computer for all of that time was a shocking realization. 
You cleared your throat and gave your coworkers the kindest smile you could pull off. 
“I am fine. Thank you very much.” 
The people whispered something between themselves and walked away with awkward nods. 
“She’s definitely sick. She smiled.” 
“You know when people are about to die and they change personality all of a sudden?”
“She never looked me in the eyes before. I felt like getting turned to stone after seeing Medusa.” 
You felt your glasses slide down your nose again at the gossip and you exhaled deeply. 
Jeong Jaehyun - and his tongue - made you realize people considered you the worst bitch in the universe. 
────────────
The HR secretary furrowed his eyebrows. 
“What do you mean, all profiles?” 
You were tapping your thigh with one fingertip in front of his desk. 
“I need all profiles of all workers in the company to choose the- uh- the best team for this huge important project, yeah.”
The young man wasn’t impressed but he wasn’t going to deny the desires of the notorious Chief Engineer. 
“I will send you the credentials to access the files, ma’am. Anything else I can do for you?” 
“Thank you. That’s all,” you gave him a small nod and turned around. “Actually,” you stopped in place and hesitated. “I know this is not your job but could you talk to someone and bring coffee to the Architets’ office?” 
The secretary blinked. “Coffee, ma’am?” 
You gulped down the irritation. “Yes, please. Don’t say it’s from me. Please.” 
────────────
“This coffee is a gift from Chief Engineer Y/N,” the HR secretary announced as he accompanied the interns carrying a tray. 
Jaehyun was groaning and extending his arms above his head when he suddenly heard the commotion. 
“I think she’s punishing us for something we did,” one person said, grabbing a cup of coffee and looking at it suspiciously. “This is also so expensive.”
“Well, even if she spit in it, I will drink it, you know what I mean,” another winked and got shoulder hit by his cackling friends. “What? She’s scary but she’s hot.” 
“She’d probably bite your dick off.”
Jaehyun got closer and stared down the iron tray. 
“You said Y/N sent this?” he asked the secretary who seemed just as baffled, Jaehyun realized. 
“Yes, sir.” 
“Did she say why?” Jaehyun grabbed a cup and smelled it. Normal coffee. 
“No clue sir. She instructed me to not tell you she sent it but-,” he interrupted himself and got closer. Jaehyun leaned towards him to hear. “-we need to track who’s giving what food to whom, you know. It’s right for you to know if perhaps something bad happens to all of you.” 
Jaehyun winced. The jokes about you being evil were funny only when he made them. 
“You don’t think she would actually do something to this coffee, right?” Jaehyun asked. 
The secretary straightened his back and although Jaehyun had no idea what expression he had on, the other man felt somehow intimidated because he stuttered a tiny “no, sir.” 
“Good. Why did she ask you to do this?” 
“Oh that, she came over to ask the profiles of all the people working at our company.” 
Jaehyun’s head was hurting. You were so convoluted. 
“Why?” 
“No clue, sir. She said something about making up a team.” 
You had no business reading the info of all of your coworkers for that. The idea of you wanting to learn more about him after the terrible interaction you had that morning made him roll his eyes in annoyance at how good it felt for a second. 
────────────
You felt like a thief although you got the info of everyone legally. You cleared your throat and started to scroll through all the profiles, mildly interested. You opened the first one and tried to read but then you puffed your cheeks and closed it. 
The J was in the middle and you pretended to have accidentally stumbled upon Jeong Jaehyun’s profile instead. 
Alright alright, you yelled at yourself in your mind. You were interested. God, his kiss was so good and his face, wow. You couldn’t forgive yourself for not looking at him once in all of those months. 
And you’ve been so rude to him. You shivered. 
Jeong Jaehyun 14 February 1997. 
You rolled your eyes. That birthday must have been made up. It’s impossible for a man like him to be a Valentine Boy. 
You tried to remember what you knew about Aquarius but your astrology knowledge was too limited so you hoped that would be compatible with your sign. 
Pause no. Why were you thinking about astrology compatibility? Maybe you were actually dying?
Tsk, graduated cum laude, the rascal. He wasn’t just pretty but also smart. 
Your eyes slowly darted across the page, eating up all the info the company could legally allow you to read and you had to admit that his projects had been insane even before coming to your company. 
And the ones he had under his belt afterwards? Well, they were all projects you also worked on. You felt sick. 
Were you really such a bad person?  
You sighed and closed his profile, starting to read the others. 
────────────
Jaehyun’s day has never felt longer. He thought he should probably go to the gym because the pain in his back was only getting worse and he should probably extend those muscles somehow. 
His brain was going over the menu for the dinner as well when he heard your voice in the main hall. He exited the lift and saw your smiling face greeting some of your fellow engineer colleagues. 
“Good work today, Minnie.” 
Poor Minnie smiled back as if the queen herself greeted her and almost tripped against the poor man who got blinded by your sudden kindness. 
Jaehyun stopped in place and sighed, trying to suppress the cackle. 
“See you tomorrow, ma’am,” the man added. 
“Have a nice evening, Yeonjun.” 
Jaehyun lifted one eyebrow at Yeonjun’s glossy eyes and walked over. 
He saw you sigh and turn around right into his chest. 
“I see you’ve done your homework.” 
You gasped and took a step back to be able to see him in the face.
“Do you remember my name too?” Jaehyun added with a cocky smile and you exhaled, crossing your arms on your chest. 
“Of course, I do.” 
Jaehyun buttoned up his jacket with a smile. “Good. Don’t forget to come to my office with the projects tomorrow.” 
“Listen,” you stopped him as he tried to walk around you. “I am- sorry for what happened this morning. I am very embarrassed about it.” 
You couldn’t look him in the eyes and Jaehyun had to tighten his fist inside his pants pocket at how cute you looked. 
“But-” you lifted your gaze on him. It was piercing. “-you have no right to treat me like this.” 
“Like this how?” 
“You’re punishing me.” 
Jaehyun opened his mouth then closed it at the accusation. It was true but he didn’t like for you to know about it. 
“I am not.” 
“You are.” 
“Coming to my office and seeing my pretty face is a punishment in your opinion?”
You put your tongue in the cheek with a scoff. “This. You’re- so cocky. You’re annoying.” 
Jaehyun’s dimples made an appearance. “You think I’m annoying? You didn’t know who I was after months of working together. That’s annoying.” 
“I apologized.” 
“Very insincerely so.” 
“I learned everything about you.” 
“Stalker.” 
You scoffed again, putting your hands on your hips. His everlasting smile was driving you nuts. 
“Alright. See you tomorrow, then. In your office. I’ll gladly hand you your work as you clearly burn with desire for me to do.” 
────────────
Back to Present, 2 weeks after the Kiss
The following days rolled on fairly easily. The annoyance and anxiety about going to Jaehyun’s office died slowly as you realized you only had to walk over, say hi, and place papers on his desk. 
If he thought you were rude by not small talking it wasn’t worse than not remembering his name and face after months of working together. 
Everything went back to normal and you started to be also decently popular in your office. Shocker, but if the chief is in a good mood and treats everyone with kindness, everyone works more efficiently. That’s the only good thing Jaehyun brought into your life. 
Well, that was until that day and the stupid yellow Post-it sticker on your desk. 
“Can you kindly check these and confirm they’re okay? JJ :)”  was still in front of you on your desk after the meeting about the Theme Park. 
There’s no need to be rude to me only because you think I’m attractive, was also still rolling in your brain and you wanted to go back to his office and yell that he was not attractive at all. He was just an annoying prick who had the upper hand because you embarrassed yourself in front of him once. 
But there were limits to all and he was starting to be too much. 
────────────
Jaehyun expected an Engineers and Architects meeting to happen at a certain point but he didn’t expect for it to be only the two of you. 
“So, I guess you’ve heard but we’re tasked to work together on a theme park.” 
You were alone in the huge meeting hall, one in front of the other, the large shiny desk separating you. Jaehyun looked at your white button down snuggly covering your breasts and the tiny bit of lace adorning your bra pocking out made him swallow dryly for the fourth time in one minute. 
“Yes,” he simply said. You moved and the shirt covered the lace. He sighed. “We can finally have a pretty theme park.” 
You rolled your eyes and Jaehyun wondered if you’d roll them the same way while he’d pound you into the mattress. 
His crush on you has been annoying him for a while now, but the recent development and the fact you didn’t even know who he was for a long time while he was under the impression that you might fuck soon has been a very low blow to his self-esteem. 
Now, he was trying to fight the attraction so badly but his cock had a brain of his own apparently because even if he found you arrogant and annoying, he really liked the soft side you showed him multiple times and that turned him on too much to ignore. 
“Engineers also have taste.” 
“Well you kissed me so I guess you do have a bit of taste, I’ll give you that.” 
You let the pen go and crossed your arms on your chest. “Can’t you keep it in your pants for one second so we can discuss this like normal adult coworkers?” 
“It is in my pants.” 
“You’re being inappropriate.” 
“You brought up cock talk.” 
“You brought up kiss talk.” 
“You kissed me first.” 
Jaehyun smiled at the victory and you leaned back in the chair. 
“Can we please stop talking about that and pretend it never happened?” 
“Actually you owe me another apology.” 
You waited with a lifted eyebrow. 
“You basically said ew architects after kissing me that night.” 
You scoffed. “And I stand by that. I’m not apologizing. Are baby architect’s feelings hurt?” 
Jaehyun licked his lower lip in annoyance. “Why?” 
“Why what?” 
“Why do you hate architects so much?” 
“Why do you hate engineers?” you resorted. 
“I don’t hate you.” 
“You do.” 
He lowered his voice. “I don’t. You want me to hate you, maybe.” 
“Why would I want that?” 
“That’s your homework for the day. Think about it.” 
“If you’re under the impression that I pretend to hate you because I secretly like you so I secretly would like for that to be the case from your part too, well, you’re wrong,” you smiled although you started to feel the muscles of your thighs shake ever so slightly under the desk. The building was almost empty and the lights were getting turned off one by one leaving you and Jaehyun alone in the huge room, faces illuminated by the blue screens of the computers and the constellation of lights of the skyline. 
“That’s a very convoluted thought. Of course, you don’t like me. You don’t even know me.” 
“You can stop rubbing that in. I know you now.” 
“Well, then it’s a matter of time before you start liking me.” 
“You’re so arrogant.” 
“I am arrogant?” 
“Well, I don’t have the presumption that everyone in the building is onto me.” 
“How do you even know I’m like that? You don’t know me.” 
“You walk around like you have a 9 inches cock.” 
Jaehyun widened his eyes for a second then leaned forward to laugh. His eyes closed and his perfect teeth shone on display. You realized he got whiskers when laughing hard. It pissed you off. 
“And if I do?” he tried. 
You scoffed with a smile. “That’s not human.” 
“9 is a lot, I’ll give you that, but it's not inhuman.”
“Well, I hope you don’t have 9 because I’d be worried about your lower back carrying that around.” 
“Holy shit, I do have back problems. You think it’s that?” 
“For fuck’s sake, Jeong Jaehyun. Please let’s get back to work.” 
Jaehyun stopped talking and you started to actually explain the new project. You both liked the little smile that remained on each other’s lips. 
────────────
Jaehyun was not at his desk that morning so you bit your lower lip, slowly putting down the files for the day. You had no reason to see each other or talk about anything else since both teams had to work on their share of tasks before meeting again but you just wanted to- you had no idea what.
You looked around and touched a few of his desk items before noticing his phone silently blowing up. You looked around the office to see if he was coming but he was nowhere to be seen. The walk around the desk felt natural but also stealthy and you hoped no one was looking at you. You sat in his chair and the jacket he kept on it smelled like him. 
You sighed. Ew men and their hot cologne, right? 
The phone’s screen had no time to turn off as text notifications rolled on the screen again and again underneath your gaze. You wondered if he was part of many active groupchats before realizing they were all private messages both from registered numbers and numbers with no name. 
You felt your throat itchy upon realizing they were mostly from women trying to chit-chat. You scoffed, staring the phone down. He was that popular huh? And he wasn’t replying to any of them? He was so arrogant-
“Fuck!” you whimpered, bringing one hand to the back of your neck and finding someone’s cold knuckles. “What do you think you’re-” you grabbed the hand and turned around. Jaehyun’s perfect eyebrow was lifted. 
“What are you doing at my desk?” he asked, interrupting your question. 
“I came to give you the files,” you stood up and looked at your hand still holding his fingers. You let them go in the same instant. 
He hummed and sat down before realizing you were still there. “Is there something I can do for you?” he turned towards you in his chair. 
You cleared your throat. “I need your phone number.” 
You had no idea why you said that but it was too late. You tried to maintain a neutral face.
Jaehyun’s expression didn’t tell you anything about what he thought. 
“You have it. It’s written on the file all workers have-” 
“Your personal cellphone number,” you interrupted him. 
The man’s eyes were piercing but you didn’t want to look away. Your brain was running quickly to make up some excuse about why you wanted it but he didn’t ask. 
He extended one arm to reach the pen holder and got one, clicking it. When he turned around he searched for your hand, the same holding his fingers before, and grabbed it gently, palm towards his face. 
“Why are your hands so cold?” you mumbled as he started to scribble on your skin. 
“Because my heart is warm,” he replied without missing a beat. “Also, I just washed them.” 
You rolled your eyes, watching him write his number slowly. His fingers were on your pulse and you hoped he could not feel how quick it was starting to get. Why was he writing on your hand instead of a piece of paper? And why didn’t you just take your hand away? Being around him made you feel and act stupid.
One strand of hair fell from his hairdo, obscuring his eyes from your gaze, but then he finished and looked up at you, the neck extended showing a single vein popping out from his tight collar. 
“There you go,” he added. 
You slid your hand from his hold and fought the urge to tighten it in a fist as if to hide something shameful. 
“Thank you,” you replied and exited the office. 
────────────
That night you were at your home desk, head in hands, trying to come up with a problem about the project you could text Jaehyun about. 
Everything could be an email and bothering coworkers outside of working hours was abhorrent, but he was Jaehyun and you didn’t care if he got mad at you. 
No. You wanted him to get mad at you. But why?
You couldn’t think of anything at all so you let your phone go and walked towards the kitchen to grab a bottle of wine. 
Last time you got drunk you kissed him, you remembered. The glass was cold and the wine fresh and you tried to drown the memories of his lips on yours because they made you shiver in embarrassment. Or desire? 
Your growling stomach communicated the need for a snack too but the only thing you could think of making were chicken nuggets so you threw them on an oven tray and hoped for the best. 
When Jaehyun heard his phone ring he was about to jump on the bed, kicking his feet and giggling before realizing he was a grown man with cock and balls. 
“Hello?” he talked into it calmly, after clearing his voice. He knew you'd call after that awkward encounter in his office and he paced the apartment the whole evening.
“Hey,” your voice on the other line sounded muffled. “You answer surprisingly well for someone that gets calls and texts from women 24/7.” 
Jaehyun smiled and sat on the bed. “So this is what it was about, huh.” 
You didn’t reply for a moment and he desperately wanted to know what expression you had on. 
“I’m calling because of an issue with the project,” you mumbled after a bit. 
“Y/N,” Jaehyun called calmly. 
“Yes.”
“Are you drunk?” 
“I am not drunk. I am working right now!” 
“Every time you’re drunk you think of me?” 
“I said I am not drunk.” 
Jaehyun kept ignoring you. “Well, you can’t deny it’s a weird coincidence.” 
“Fuck-” you suddenly said and Jaehyun stopped talking. 
“Oh, shit-” you repeated and dropped your phone, probably on the ground. 
“Y/N, what’s happening?” 
Jaehyun could not make sense of any of the sounds on the other side but it didn’t seem anything good. 
“Y/N, everything is fine?” he spoke again but you probably couldn’t hear him. 
“My fucking nuggets-” he heard your whimper as if far away and the moment the smoke detector went off and you mumbled something about a fire extinguisher Jaehyun got his shoes and ran outside his apartment. 
────────────
Your voice got cut off as soon as you opened the door after the endless incessant doorbell rings from someone clearly very panicked. You opened and his arms were so strong that your breath went missing and you were forced to nuzzle your face into the crook of his neck by the sheer force of his embrace. You’ve never seen him with soft unstyled hair and the worried expression underneath his fringe just made him even cuter. 
“You’re just-,” you heard Jaehyun’s deep voice on the crown of your head, “-so fucking stupid.” 
You furrowed your eyebrows but he went on. 
“So irresponsible. I am shocked at how you could have let your fucking oven burn when you have the brains to build a whole city.” 
“I was distracted,” you spoke softly into his shirt. It smelled like laundry detergent. His mix of insults and compliments weirdly made you giggle.
Jaehyun let you go and grabbed your face with both hands, finally looking at you frantically and squishing your cheeks. 
“I am okay,” you assured him. “Everything is under control.” 
The man sighed deeply as if slightly placated but the line between his eyebrows didn’t get smoothed out. And when he finally looked behind you and assessed the tragic situation of your burned-out oven covered in white foam he had to close his eyes for a moment to gather his shit. 
“It’s okay! It was an old oven anyway,” you turned around, trying to ignore that he was still holding your hand. 
“Your house could have burned down with you in it.”
“How do you even know where I live? And you called me the stalker?” you confronted him. 
“It’s written in your profile.” 
He let go of your hand and got closer to the kitchen, looking at the mess with hands on the hips like the embodiment of a dad. It made your guts tingle. 
“Sure. And you know all the addresses of all of your coworkers,” you followed him, resting your elbows on the island. 
“Of course, I don’t. I don’t like them. Stop talking nonsense and let’s clean this out.” 
You had no idea in what capacity you helped because at a certain point Jaehyun just gave you a glass of water and told you to sit down. 
You didn’t feel that well. 
Both because you were kinda tipsy and you went through all stages of grief putting out a fire, but also because he was there, and he said he liked you. Right? Jung Jaehyun said he liked you. 
And not only. 
"I know you're capable of dealing with this alone. You don't need my help but I'd like to help," he said as you tried to push him to the side and clean the mess yourself. No one talked like that before and a weird fuzzy sensation softened the muscles in your legs making you sit down. 
You sipped on the water without talking back, staring at the way his forearms were flexing while cleaning out your oven and the surroundings.
“No need to be meticulous. They’re coming tomorrow to change it anyway,” you tried, feeling awkward as no one did you any favours before. 
Jaehyun didn’t reply and you realized he looked very handsome when focused. Well, not that he was ugly when unfocused, but the way his jaw looked sharper and his gaze darker made you sigh and take another sip of water. 
“Is your hair bothering you? I can give you a headband,” you tried again. 
“You are bothering me.” 
You scoffed. “I am trying to be nice right now. Your hair is pretty long. Doesn’t it go in your eyes?” 
You were expecting some witty flirty reply back, along the lines of you pushing it back for him, but Jaehyun didn’t look in the mood. 
The truth was that you felt very embarrassed about the situation; as if you failed at something and Jaehyun was scolding you. That was new for you. 
“Fuck, this could have been a tragedy,” he mumbled, as if almost on cue. 
“I am sorry to have worried you.” 
Jaehyun stopped to look at you. “Why are you apologising to me? You’re the one surviving a fire.” 
“But I am okay. You seem much more shaken than me.” 
Jaehyun kept silent and when he stood up you realized he finished cleaning up the foam and the dark burning spots. You stared at the back of his head as he washed his hands in the sink. 
“Also thank you for being here,” you added. You didn’t know what else to do so you got up and walked towards him. Was a hug weird? Should you just shake his hand and call him a pal? 
His body stiffened a bit feeling your timid arms around his waist. “You’re still drunk?” he simply said, patting his hands dry with your kitchen towel.  You stopped and slid them away. 
“You said you like me,” you mumbled against his back. 
“Yep, still very drunk.” 
He grabbed your hands to be able to turn around and face you, resting his hips against the kitchen cabinet. 
“You said there were issues about the project when you called,” he added. 
You blinked at him. “You really want to talk about work right now?” 
Maybe he did. He was your coworker after all. And he certainly didn’t come over to “save” your sorry ass if you didn’t call him about it. 
Suddenly you felt very embarrassed. 
You kissed the man in an elevator after not even remembering his name and then asked for his number and now you wanted to make out with him in front of your destroyed oven? 
You gulped and took a small step back but your breath stopped as his hands holding yours grabbed your waist instead and didn’t let you move away too much. 
“I am buying some time,” he explained. 
Your voices got so low that you barely could hear him, but your gaze on his lips helped you understand what he was talking about. 
“Are you scared to kiss me again?” you asked. 
“Are you going to ask me to forget it happened Monday morning again?” 
His fingers were delicate on your skin for a moment you remembered you were wearing your pajamas. The thin top definitely didn’t hide anything from his gaze and the midriff being exposed to his knuckles made you shiver. 
“I won’t ask to do that if you don’t make it awkward.” 
“Fucking your coworker is always awkward.” 
You blinked at him as if suddenly realizing you were standing half naked between your hot coworker’s thighs (who was an architect!!) “I didn’t say I was planning to fuck. Just-uhm kiss.” 
Jaehyun smiled and your eyes darted to his dimples then back to the white flash of his teeth. 
“You think you’ll be able to stop after one single kiss?” 
You stepped back and crossed your arms on your chest to feign confidence but mostly to hide the tremor in your arms. "Try me."
Jaehyun took a moment to let his gaze slide on your features. “You get very cute when you’re drunk, you know that?” 
“Well, to quote someone, I guess the stick I have up my ass disappears.” 
“I can put it ba-”
You put your fingers on his lips. “You will not continue that disgusting phrase,” you warned. 
Jaehyun smiled wider and his lips rubbed on your skin. He kissed the spot then he kissed one of the fingertips. You inhaled, eyes trained on his gaze, unable to move away anymore as the room suddenly got sucked of any sound besides your own breath. 
He grabbed that hand and kissed your wrist, this time closing his eyes for a moment as if savouring it. You gulped. And when he locked eyes with you the shiver that went down your spine manifested in a little exhale. Jaehyun smiled again, a little curve on his plump lips you felt on the softness of your fingers. 
The kiss felt the same as the first one you exchanged in the elevator after he pulled you closer towards himself. But this time you took your sweet time, letting your palms feel his chest, the skin on his neck, the thick hair on his nape. He did the same, caressing your back with his knuckles, rubbing your thighs with his blunt nails, and grabbing your ass in your flimsy shorts. 
You whimpered in his mouth at the feeling and he hummed back, a low sound, almost a growl, your lips apart but tongues still swirling until you dove back in. 
“Can’t you be like this in the office too?” his murmur made your eyes open. He was licking his lips while his fingers intertwined with yours in a slow dance of pushing you back towards the couch. 
“You want me to get called by HR?” 
He flashed you a small chuckle. “That secretary is so scared of you by the way. He thought you poisoned the coffee.” 
The couch’s arm dug into your thighs and you sat on it, pulling Jaehyun closed by the waistband of his sweats. His eyelashes fluttered as you looked up at him, then again as you dragged your palm upwards underneath his shirt. 
“And you think I didn’t?” you tilted your head to the side. 
“I am still alive.” 
“Not for too long. I might suck the life out of you," you placed a single wet kiss on his hip bone making him hiss. “Take this off,” you tugged at the shirt. 
Jaehyun’s hum was low. “Shit. Ordering me around?”
You looked up. “Please take this off?” you changed your tone but you couldn’t hide the mockery. 
He exhaled amused and did it in a second, pulling it by the collar and throwing it on the ground. But you didn’t have time to do what you intended to because the torso you so desperately wanted to see disappeared from your sight - Jung Jaehyun Chief of the Architect Department fell on his knees, savouring the delicate skin of your inner thigh. 
You gasped at the sensation and the anticipation of what was actually going to happen made you suddenly dizzy. 
You wanted to grab his hair to support yourself, physically or morally, but his head jerked back and with the most angelic and devilish smile, he pushed you back on the couch. 
“You should be respectful,” you chuckled at the manhandling. "I'm a senior." 
Jaehyun grabbed your ankles with one hand as a reply while the other swiftly slid your garments off your body. “I will be respectful after I am done,” he murmured. “For now you will have to take the disrespect, I’m afraid.”
You tried to think of a witty phrase but your legs were being directed on his shoulders, his knees were on the carpet in front of you now and his voice came from between your thighs. Oh, and you were naked. 
Too much work for your brain. 
“Thought you were a gentleman.” You didn't like your shaky voice. You didn’t like any of this. Didn’t you make some kind of bet just moments before? You forgot anything you two said to each other already. 
“I am a gentleman who knows when to not be gentle.”
And you soon realized what that meant. 
You had no idea if other men's tongues have felt that velvety before or if you were just developing the fattest crush on Jeong Jaehyun the Architect as he was devouring you and making you biased. But fuck he knew how to eat pussy. And you made sure he knew that. 
Jaehyun hummed appreciatively at the praise, his deep eyes covered by his long eyelashes making you unable to look away. So you slid your hand in his luscious hair, pushing it away from his face and pulled a bit. His arms and back muscles flinched and he visibly enjoyed your breathy moans when he increased the pace of his tongue's movement. 
"Shit, Jaehyun-" you curled your toes against the smooth skin of his spine then gasped, feeling his long fingers rub your slick before swiftly sliding inside of you. It was wet and messy and loud and the moment he let go of your clit with a dirty plop to start kissing your stomach instead you knew that night wasn't going to end with just that. Should you stop him? Should you continue? Would you be okay tomorrow? 
"Where are you?" Jaehyun curled his fingers and you bit your lower lip. 
"I'm here," you replied against his wet lips, body rocking back and forth on the couch as he fingerfucked you, the veins popping on his bicep making you swallow dryly. 
"I need you to focus on me. What are you thinking about?" he leaned down to rub his nose against your ear before outlining it with his tongue. 
You shivered underneath him and your nails probably left some indents in his pristine skin. 
"About how much I want your cock inside of me," you exhaled. That was the truth. 
Jaehyun hummed deeply and his breath became more shallow. 
"And?" he kissed your neck slowly, so different from the pace of his wrist to make you dizzy. 
"And I'm thinking of the consequences," you curved your spine, raising the tone of your voice on the last syllables. "Fuck, Jeong, this is-"
"Yeah?" he came back to your mouth, letting you whimper your moans against his lips. "You want me to stop then? No orgasm, no consequences."
"If you stop-"
"Then what?" 
You shuddered, frantically palming his hard chest then going down to loosely grab his moving wrist. 
"Are you going to beg for it? I'm kinda curious to see you like that," he added. The roughness in his already deep voice sealed the deal and you couldn't do anything but let your head fall back and bite down a scream as you came around Jaehyun's fingers. It was too late. It was already too late the moment you pushed him against the damn elevator wall. 
He let you decide when he should stop moving his fingers and you felt yourself clench rhythmically around them as you desperately tried to calm down. His lips were on your throat and you realized that he was talking, murmuring something so sweetly that for a moment you wished for him to just hold you until you fell asleep. 
"Good girl," he placed a kiss on the tender skin, then on the corner of your lips as you opened your eyes to look at his gorgeous face. His cheeks and ears were dusty pink and it made your heart skip a beat. 
You pulled him down and kissed him again, slowly and deeply. Then he smiled, stopping your hand from reaching underneath his sweatpants. 
"Tonight is all about you," he whispered. 
You furrowed your eyebrows but the mind-blowing orgasm blew your mind so well that you had no reply. 
"Why?" Your voice was a quiet waver. 
"I don't want you to regret anything," he replied. "And I don't want you to think about the consequences." 
Somehow it made sense. Waking up tomorrow and realizing you let him fuck you with his tongue felt better than realizing he came down your throat. 
Were you really that proud? Maybe you did have a stick up your ass. 
"Don't argue with me," he gave you a crooked smile as he got up on his knees. 
"I'm not arguing with you."
"You have a specific look in your eyes when you're about to debate me." 
You crossed your arms on your chest mostly to cover up given the sudden disappearance of his body from on top of you. Then you sat up and closed your legs. 
"That's not true. You're making things up." 
Jaehyun collected his shirt with another smile and you stared at his long back and the way his sweatpants sat low on his hips. 
The fucking consequences. 
"I really need you though," you whispered. 
Jaehyun wore his top. "How do you want me?"
"Riding," you replied. 
He chuckled. "Of course you do. You can't possibly let an architect force you to your knees, can you?."
You curled your toes at his words. "No, sir." 
Yes, he fucking could. 
Jaehyun leaned down again to slide his hand on your jaw and almost kiss you. But he whispered instead. 
"I'll let you ride me if you keep calling me sir." 
────────────
You didn't notice when Jaehyun left your apartment that night. You thought that the way he took you to your bed bridal style and let you nuzzle into his chest would roam your brain the whole night and would prevent you from falling asleep yet you had the best night's sleep in months.
And you hated to admit it but waking up that morning you felt embarrassed out of your mind but you'd probably have crawled out of your skin if you actually fucked him until the end.
"Hope you got home well," you texted him. Maybe that was how adults did stuff. Maybe that’s what he wanted from you in the first place. Just fucking. Yet why was he so considerate? 
"Yes :)", he replied with his stupid smiley face a second after. Was he not busy? How did he even see your texts in the middle of the hundred he was getting? That made you almost kick your feet and you realized you were slowly descending into madness. 
"And I slept as well as you did after taking care of your gift," he added. 
You furrowed your eyebrows. "What gift?"
"My boner" 
You sighed so much that you thought you had turned into a horse. Then you had to pass one hand on your face as flashes of Jaehyun's hand fucking his cock while thinking of you entered your brain. 
"It was you who stopped me from taking care of it myself." He was driving you insane. Your coworker - an architect (!!!). 
"I wasn't blaming you :)" 
"You're a bit of a masochist"
"I'm everything when I'm with you" 
"Barf"
"Honestly I thought you wouldn't even want to talk to me today" 
"Well we both know that you have poor judgement" 
"Maybe I should have let you ride after all :)" 
"Okay byee I'm turning off my phone" 
"Or suck me well"
"I'm blocking this number" 
"Or let me blow your back" 
"Sending this to HR" 
"Andy, if you're reading this, the Chief Engineer let me fuck her with my tongue and she liked it"
────────────
Texting and fooling around was one thing, but seeing his polished figure while sober and in the middle of the workplace made you almost have a panic attack.
"Good morning," you trilled, hands already pushing the files on his desk. 
"Hey," he lifted his face and gave you a warm but professional smile. 
"See you around," you nodded once and turned towards the exit hoping not to hit the glass door with your face. 
He let you go.
Then you came back the day after. And again. And again. No further exchange. Give papers. Take papers. See his face. Lose your mind at night with your hand between your legs and his name on your lips.
Then your name, pronounced by those lips you’ve been staring at as he pretended to sleep the previous weekend, made you stop in place and close your eyes. You swallowed and got ready to turn around. 
He was already there, standing right behind you and you inhaled his cologne as you took a step back. 
His shirt was open enough for his collarbone to peek through and the way his half-exposed arms looked, crossed on his chest, made you almost angry. 
“Would you like to have lunch together?” he asked. 
You lifted your gaze to meet his eyes the looked around his figure. Jaehyun smiled, tilting his head to the side to get in the middle of your gaze. 
“Don’t look at them. Look at me,” he added. 
“It’s easy for rumours to start forming,” you murmured, imitating his pose. Your fingers grabbed your arms perhaps a bit too hard. 
“It’s just a normal lunch.” 
“I don’t do normal lunches. It would look weird.” 
“At least you’re self-aware.” 
You snorted and turned around. “The last floor is always empty,” you only said as you walked away. 
────────────
Jaehyun didn’t actually expect you to be there. Somehow he thought the way your voice would waver when he was around, or the way you melted under his touch back in your apartment, the noises that you made because of him, all because of him, was just some incredibly orchestrated big joke. You didn’t try to speak to him after that weekend and you didn’t linger around his desk anymore. Hell, you didn’t even text him. 
He had to do something or he would go insane. 
Yet you were in the last room of the upper floor, sitting down on the only couch inside of it, staring at your little plastic container with your lunch and waiting for him. 
You were adorable. 
He had to stop in place before entering to gather his shit. 
Then he knocked two times on the glass frosted door and your head snapped. Your eyes looked so pretty that he felt his fingertips tickle. 
“Hey,” he said.
“Hey,” you replied. 
Jaehyun closed the door behind him and he could sense the way your spine tensioned. He wanted to pass his palm on it, he wanted you to curve it as he’d grab your neck to pull you up against his chest as he’d pound into you from behind again and again until you’d break. 
“What have you got?” he walked slowly and sat down. The couch was sturdy enough. He made a mental note. 
You looked down at your container as if seeing it for the first time. “Cold pasta. What about you?” 
Jaehyun licked his lips. There you were, looking at him as if hoping for him to devour you. 
"Don't look at me like that."
You closed your mouth. “Like what?” you smirked.
He exhaled. 
"Should I close my eyes then?" you giggled. 
Jaehyun opened his lips to breathe and your gaze fell on them.
"Do you know what would keep my eyes closed?" you asked with a lower voice.
The man's eyes darkened and a whiff of air dilated his nostrils as he leaned in and knocked the air out of your lungs. The kiss was rough and its rhythm erratic. His palms were on your jaw and cupping your head. Yours were on his chest, grabbing at his shirt. You had no idea where your food containers disappeared because suddenly your hands were full of him and your legs straddling his body as he plopped you on his lap. 
You opened your eyes a little when you felt him pull away to let you breathe, the air flowing between your lips still brushing against each other. You looked at them, they were flushed and plump and you desperately needed to taste them again. His gaze was on your eyes and his deep voice surprised you.
"You opened them again." His voice was so deep that you felt it vibrating in your chest. 
You met his eyes.
"I guess you'll have to keep kissing me, then."
His palms on your waist felt wide and so warm that when he slid them on your ass to pull you closer you felt like mewling. Close so close it was so close and you were at work. You were kissing at work. You were sitting on his lap, on his sexy black dress pants, fingers sliding in the slit of his shirt, feeling his chest, his neck, his jaw, his hair. Fuck. 
“We need to slow down,” you exhaled, pulling yourself away from him.
“Why? You’re afraid you’re going to cum too quickly?”
His arms wrapped around you even tighter and his amused and warm mouth attached to your throat instead. You felt your eyes roll back in your head as he nibbled on your skin, peppering wet kisses all over it. And when he scooted his hips forward, his palms on your ass pulling you closer until your chest hit his face, you inhaled feeling his hard cock underneath you. Jaehyun looked up, drinking in your reaction. 
“Show me how much you want this. Show me that you don’t care about the damn consequences.”
Like a spell, your hips started to move on their own, rubbing yourself on him. You were desperate, humping him like a mad woman and his choked moan as he let his head fall back on the couch, extending his throat, was the final thing about his maddening presence to fully break your mind.
"Does it feel good, sir?" you didn't hide the mockery in your tone, feeling your control sliding back in your hands. 
But then Jaehyun shattered it again.
"Ride me."
His eyes were two dark cuts under his scrunched eyebrows and his command made your whole center boil. You stopped your movements and you shuddered on top of him. 
His chest was expanding and shrinking under your palms and when you pushed into it to be able to stand his Adam apple shifted in his throat as he swallowed. 
"Undress me."
Your order made his tongue poke his inner cheek and you smirked, mirroring his expression.
Jaehyun sat closer to the edge of the couch to reach your body and your skin shivered with goosebumps the moment his long fingers unbuttoned your pants. His gaze never shifted away from your face and it made you boil with need. 
The fabric hit the floor and you scooted it to the side, the pant legs so wide your heels just passing through, leaving you and your naked and elongated legs for Jaehyun to touch with his wide palms. They were warm as they slid up your thighs, your breath hitching as you looked at his open lips, his own breath stuck in his lungs and released only when he pulled you towards him. 
You bit your lower lip, feeling his mouth on your stomach, and then you let your head fall back as his fingers trailed your sides, lifting your top until reaching your breasts. You lifted your arms and Jaehyun stood for a moment to help the fabric away from your limbs and before you could kiss him, he sat down, with your between his knees, and unclipped your bra. You gulped, helping yourself stand by placing your hands on his wide and firm shoulders. 
“This is so inappropriate,” you whispered, muffling a whine as Jaehyun kneaded your soft breasts, looking at the skin fill the gaps between his fingers. 
“Yeah? Is being naked like this in front of me making your sweet pussy achy and wet?” Jaehyun’s deep voice made your stomach shiver as he spoke on your skin, trailing open wet kisses down your navel.
You were about to reply, your hazy brain still able to formulate some snarky comment, but when his hands cupped your ass, and one slid to your thigh to lift it on his shoulder, your hearing flatlined. You felt your underwear being pushed to the side and his luscious tongue making you gasp. 
“Jaehyun-” you felt your legs suddenly wobbly and his grip on your body tightened, his mouth licking and sucking at your clit making you grab his perfectly coiffed hair and pull. 
His groan travelled inside of you and his blunt nails dug into your soft skin before he let you go, sporting shining lips and heavy breath. 
He didn’t speak, and he only grinned as he sat back on the couch, his arrogant face making you quiver almost as much as his tongue inside of you. He patted his lap. 
You scoffed trying to hide a laugh but before you could roll your eyes at him, his hands were on your waist, making you sit flush against him. 
“If you dare to roll your eyes at me, I’ll give you a real reason to do that,” he murmured against your lips. 
You kissed him, deeply and messily, grabbing the short hairs at his nape with one hands, and cupping his balls with the other, making him hiss. 
“Oh yeah?” you whispered back, massaging him through the tight dress pants he was wearing. 
His adam apple bobbed in his throat but his eyes shone with mischief. He nodded, not for one second intimidated. It infuriated you. 
So you undid his button and slid his zip down, feeling the wetness of his precum adorning his expensive boxers. 
“And yet, look who made a mess,” you cooed, sliding your hand underneath the elastic band and making him close his eyes and extend his neck back. 
“God,” he groaned. 
He was long and thick, his skin velvety and soft, hot with need. You jerked him with your hand slowly, swallowing at the thought of having him inside of you, splitting you apart. 
Maybe you made a sound, or maybe he saw your expression as you opened his eyes but he smiled faintly. 
“Come on, end this torture. You want me as badly as I want you, chief engineer,” he said. And you would have had another ounce of brat in you if only he didn’t say the following things. Just one word, and it made you dizzy with desire.
“Please,” he murmured. 
Your hand shook as you felt his bigger one on top of yours, directing his pretty cock towards your aching core. You let it go and Jaehyun aligned himself, lifting his gaze with a heavy breath to see your lustful expression as you sat on it slowly. 
You both exhaled, his deep growl and your higher pitched breathy sound, until you reached the base, his girth making you see stars. 
“Good girl, take it all,” he breathed out, letting you adjust. 
“Fuck, Jaehyun-” you gulped, feeling your skin hot, as you lifted yourself once before sinking deep down again. 
He hissed, “I know, baby, I know.”
The petname worked as a spell, throwing you into a fast haze, riding his cock as deep as you could. Jaehyun wrapped one arm around your waist, while the other hand raised to shove his fingers inside your mouth. 
“I’d love for the whole company to hear how good my cock makes you feel, pretty girl, but we don’t want a call from HR, do we?” 
You gagged on them at first, then sucked, trying to turn down the noises you didn’t even realize you were making. 
And when your movements became sloppy and you felt on the verge of losing your mind, Jaehyun’s hips snapped, thrusting up inside of you and making you fist his pristine shirt. 
“That’s it, baby, take it like a good girl.” 
You let go of Jaehyun’s fingers to whine, but then you choked again as his wet hand warmly grabbed your throat instead, making you steady yourself on his wrist instead. 
“Fuck, just like that,” he pulled your body even closer to himself, squeezing your breasts against his expensive wristwatch. It would probably leave a bruise and for some reason the thought of being marked by Jaehyun made you quiver on his cock so hard that with a few deep thrusts you came undone, shaking in his arms and calling his name again and again and again. 
Jaehyun’s warm breath tickled your face and his muscles were pumped with tension as he forced his hips to still, feeling your clenching walls tighten around him rhythmically. 
“Baby, I need to cum or I’ll pop a fucking vein,” he chuckled breathlessly, the hand previously on your throat cupping your face instead. 
“Then cum inside of me,” you replied, ears still ringing from the raging orgasm. 
Jaehyun groaned and snapped, drilling into you so fast that you didn’t have enough force to fully oxygenize your lungs, his arms tightly around your soft body and his face buried in the crook of your neck. 
The sounds were dirty, the tall windows of the small office were getting foggy, and you wondered how long you’ve been fucking like rabbits over your lunch break when Jaehyun’s hips stilled, lifted ever so slightly from the couch, deep inside of you, and you felt on the verge of another orgasm seeing him dig his fingers into your flesh. 
“Fuck-” he exhaled, and you bit your lower lip, whimpering as you felt his spurts of cum coating your insides. Then his hips moved again, prolonging his high as much as he could, the vein on his forehead showing you just how much blood was pumping inside of him. 
You’ve never felt like that and you’ve never seen him lose control just as much as you did. 
“Jaehyun- I think I’ll-” you pressed your palms into his hard chest and he rested back on the couch, looking at your with dark eyes and plump lips. 
“Give me another one, beautiful,” he murmured, his cock sliding out of your and his fingers collecting the cum before shoving it back inside. 
“Shit-” you closed your eyes, losing yourself in the feeling of his fingers pumping in and out of you and your spine curved making you bite your lower lip until almost tasting blood when he added his other hand, rubbing your sensitive clit. 
“I can’t-” you mumbled, “I can’t- please-”
“Yes, baby, cum all over my hands,” he urged, his gaze never leaving your face as if bewitched. 
And you did. 
────────────
You were grateful for Jaehyun not abandoning you in the office’s bathroom alone to clean up the mess you asked for but the one he did. 
“You know I can technically use my cock to take the cum out,” he tried again outside the door. 
You rolled your eyes amused. “I said, no thanks, I got it.”
“The tip is anatomically made so that a man is able to take out the cum a previous man-” he started to ramble but his words were cut off when you opened the door. He blinked staring at you and you noticed his ears were a dusty pink. 
“Do you always share fizzy drinks bottle cups facts when embarrassed?” you finished adjusting your clothes. 
He cleared his voice. “Do you think there would be sex facts on the cups of fizzy drinks? Also, why would I be embarrassed?” 
You crossed your arms on your chest for a moment, taking him in. 
“Do you perhaps have a little crush on me, Jung Jaehyun?” 
He scoffed, putting his hands in his pockets. “No.” 
You expected him to say that but the sudden confidence threw you off. 
He leaned in. “It’s not a small crush. I thought it was obvious.” 
He then straightened his back and opened the office door. “Come on, chief, I think we might get a call from HR anyway because we had a 3 hour long lunch.” 
You shook your head, trying to conceal the little giggle your body apparently wanted to let out. 
“You have too much faith in your skills. We went at it for like 15 minutes at best.” 
Jaehyun stopped in place and turned around slowly. 
You stopped too. 
And when he grabbed you and threw you over his shoulder, giving your ass a good spank, the yell and laugh that escaped you was probably heard in the whole company. 
2K notes · View notes
hoony2k · 4 months
Text
ANNOYING THINGS THEY DO
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Enha hyung line goofy annoying compilation
PAIRING: hyung line
GENRE: fluff, humour
WARNINGS: mentions of kissing
NOTE: hii i was really excited to share this since its been in my drafts the longest...i'm still writing the maknae line and wondered hm what if i just divided the lines yk jakehoon's is NOT longer its an illusion (lie)
masterlist
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★ HEESEUNG:
stares at you, blank emotionless stare. At first, you think it's an affectionate prank where he's waiting for the moment your eyes meet so he can scare you but no. It might seem cute at the start but then it turns almost sinister because he will not stop looking at you with those love-sick eyes and smiles that turn blank and you're worried if he's okay. When you ask him about it, he says YOU'RE lovesick and delusional because that's how he looks at everyone. Man has to save his crumbling dignity somehow. You're with your coworkers, minding your own business and your friend nudges you and asks "if you know him?" Him being your bf who's been making heart eyes at you from across the room for an hour straight.
★ JAY:
He's a neat and clean person which is great for mornings when you're rushing out and can't find where you placed your socks, keys and bag. But it's not fun when you're minding your own business and he texts you "pls pick up your laundry next time." Or complains about last night's dirty dishes you promised you would clean. They're just dirty dishes to you but he rolls his eyes and says it's so much deeper than that and gives you a speech. Draws a chart where he divides chores and duties and sticks it on the fridge so no one forgets. The chart has a rewards and punishment feature. Rewards mean extra kisses and he's not evil so he keeps the punishment low- just two hours without a kiss.
★ JAKE:
the type to speak during movies. It's a variety of statements and questions. Sometimes it's endearing when he recognises a certain actor from another liked film but has this habit of commenting on scenes regardless of the genre. "oh wow. Hide instead of calling for help, why not?" "That is NOT scientifically possible but they could have at least made it sound like they knew physics." Sometimes he gets passionate and you need to grab his shoulder to calm him down. There's going to be a crucial, heart-wrenching scene of the two main leads staring at one another playing, you're at the edge of your seat and he'll turn your head towards him with his fingers and go, "Do you think they stared at each other pores and compared skin types? "
★ SUNGHOON:
makes everything a competition just to make it "fun". Has a bit of trouble understanding when people aren't competitive or don't like a challenge. Which is why he's created puzzles in your own house 😭. Holds a "who can eat food the fastest" competition, Hides your favourite mug and puts a riddle note in its place. "Babe, it'll be so fun, come on." It's not and every time he pulls a stunt like that you want to grab him by the throat but he'll swiftly grab your hands and show off his stupid fang smile and you'll forget what you were going to do. The type to prank you by hiding behind ajar doors and spooking the life out of you and anticipates you doing the same He is so cute. Constantly tries to provoke your competitive spirit by making mundane tasks a competition and sure it's fun but not all the time TT.
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Thank you so much for reading!
All rights belong to me. Please do not translate/edit/copy.
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rafesfavgirl · 14 days
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treat you better — j. maybank
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❝ tell me, why are we wasting time on all your wasted crying when you should be with me instead? i know i can treat you better ❞
pairing: best friend!jj x cheater!reader
context: once again, you went through your boyfriend's phone and found things you didn't wanna find. but for some reason, you can't seem to build up the courage to finally end things with him (he was your first love, after all). so, you turn to your best friend, jj, for advice and comfort.
words: 1.4k+
warnings: reader's in a toxic relationship, mild cheating (physical & emotional, but i don't condone it!!), a little angst, fluff
you sat at the edge of the pier at the chateau, your eyes focused on the way the moon reflected off the marsh. you had just snuck out of your boyfriend's house after he fell asleep and you looked through his phone.
adriana. kelly. paige. maya. lauryn. the number of girls' names you found in his insta dms and messages went on and on.
why did you put up with this? i mean, sure, he was your first… everything, but was he really worth it?
"y/n?" you hear a familiar voice call out your name and turn your head to find jj walking down the dock to join you. "what are you doing out here?"
"just needed some time to think," you said, looking back out towards the marsh.
jj lets out a sigh, already having an inkling of what must be bothering you, and takes a seat beside you. "let me guess… liam again?"
"i just don't understand why it can't just be me," you shrug, a thousand things running through your head. most of the time, liam told you the girls were just his "friends". but deep down, you always wondered whether or not he took it any further with any of them. and that thought, alone, made you sick to your stomach.
"i mean, am i doing something wrong?" you turn your head to look jj, only to find that he was already looking at you, a certain kind of sadness filling his baby blues. he hated that you even thought you were the one in the wrong.
"it's not you, y/n. whatever he's doing, it's on him," he tells you. "stop putting up with it."
"but i love him, j," you admit, your voice cracking a little. you knew that you shouldn't. he was a scum bag. nothing but a cheater. but he was also the guy who made you feel like the most special girl in the world. the one you'd completely laid yourself bare to. "what am i suppose to do about that?"
the defeated look in your eyes broke his heart. but instead of listing off different ways you could deal with liam, jj decides to be a friend, and opens his arms up to you, "come here."
for the first time all night, you let yourself break, and immediately fall into his arms.
"i just don't get it," you sobbed into jj's chest, as he ran a hand through your hair and rested his head on top of yours,
in an attempt to soothe you. "i've done everything, j." you continued. "everything he needs from me, i do. everything he wants me to be, i try to be. so why can't he just let the other girls go? why can't i just be the one?"
hearing you cry about this guy was not only breaking jj's heart, but also making his blood boil. liam didn't deserve you, he knew that much.
after a few minutes in silence of jj just running his hands through your hair and pepperring soft kisses on your head, you finally pull away from him, looking like a complete mess.
there were now black stains under your eyes from crying some of your mascara off, and pieces of your hair stuck to your tear-stained cheeks, as you sniffled.
"i'm sorry," you said, attempting to rub off the mascara stains also leftover on jj's shirt. "your shirt's all stained with tears and mascara now."
"i don't give a shit about my shirt, y/n," he tells you, bringing a hand up to tuck your messy hair behind your ear. "are you okay?"
you sighed, the tears threatening to well up in your eyes again. ugh. after hearing yourself going on about the way you've felt about liam treating you, you were beginning to wonder whether or not it was really love you were feeling for him or not.
but if it wasn't love, why did you still feel like crying?
"i don't even know anymore," you say honestly, shaking your head and running your fingers through your hair. "i mean, how do you even go about loving someone who's hurt you so much?"
"you don't," jj tells you.
"you don't think i love him?" i asked. i wasn't sure why i was asking jj, but i also knew that he knew me better than anyone. maybe even better than liam. so if there was anyone who could tell whether or not i was in love… it'd be him, right?
"i can't tell you how you feel, y/n," he says.
"i'm not asking you to," i reply. "i just wanna know what you think."
he sighs, and shifts his eyes between yours. he knew exactly what he wanted to say, but he wasn't sure it was his place to do so—more so, he wasn't sure you'd like his take.
"promise you won't get mad?"
you chuckle, feeling uneasy now. "why would i get mad?"
"i think you're scared," he says, causing you to furrow your brows.
you scoff, thinking he sounds ridiculous. "scared? why would i be scared?"
"because he's your first," he shrugs. "i mean, he was your first, right?"
"so? what does that have to do with anything?" you ask, knowing damn well the information was relevant.
"i know you, y/n," he says, locking his eyes with mine. "you're a hopeless romantic who has your head buried in those romance books all the time because that's what you want. you want your first to be the one. and you're a perfectionist. you can't stand the idea of putting your all into one person only for them to not be worth it… so all this time… that's what you've tried to do."
you stay quiet. jj was actually making sense.
"i'm not saying you didn't love him," he continues. "i think you really did, but the love you felt before isn't what you're feeling now. i think it's just indifference. you don't want to believe that you've actually lost feelings for someone you've fought so hard for, so you try to convince yourself those feelings are still there. because that way… at least you won't be the bad guy."
your mouth had fallen agape, as you realized that jj was right. "wow."
"but you're not the bad guy anyway," he assures you, placing a hand on top of yours. "you've done all you can. what he does isn't your fault. your only fault would be staying."
"but what if he's fucked me up so bad that i've become unlovable?" you ask, voicing your real fear. truth was, you weren't always the best girlfriend. since liam made you feel so insecure about his feelings towards you all the time, it made you act out in ways you never thought you would. you'd call him incessantly when he wouldn't answer. you'd demand he cut certain girls off. ask for his location at all times. he saw the absolute worst of you. and yet, he stayed. what if no one else did?
"is that really what you think?" jj asks.
"i wasn't always the perfect girlfriend, j," i admit, glancing down and fiddling with his fingers on top of mine. "i was insecure all the time. i constantly-"
"because he made you feel that way," jj cuts you off, and picks your head up with his hands to make you look at him. "don't you get it, y/n? whatever you did, it was because of him. anyone made to feel insecure would act out. that's not your fault. you're just…" his eyes shift between yours. "human."
"but what if-"
"but nothing," he shook his head. "you are the absolute perfect version of yourself, y/n. and liam's an idiot for not realizing that. it doesn't get better than you."
without even thinking and being overwhelmed by the sweetness of jj's words, you lean in to kiss him.
he doesn't even hesitate to kiss you back, his hands on your face immediately tangling into your hair. 
your hands make their way to back of his head, the kiss deepening as they do.
your tongues dance together in perfect harmony, until you abruptly pull away.
"wait, wait, wait," you say, and he looks at you, a mix of confusion and sadness at the lost of touch present on his face. "this feels wrong."
he glances down, "oh."
"no, not like that. i mean-" you take a deep breath to get your words together, while jj just looks at you. "the kiss was great. amazing, even. it's just… i'm still technically liam's girlfriend."
his eyes light up at the compliment about the kiss, before he chuckles, "shit."
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owliellder · 8 months
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circling back to this finally!
i'm so sorry i wasn't able to do this sooner. i was gonna write it out yesterday but i was busy surviving a tummy ache on top of a 60 hour work week.
i tried to make this super duper sweet for you. forgive me, my sweet anon 💔
ID! Leon x Pregnant! Reader
MDNI 18+
Pregnancy was more than difficult.
Day in and out you hoped your pregnancy would be easy like your friends' had been, but of course you can't always get what you want.
Dealing with everything you didn't want to happen was more than frustrating, and for the first seven months, Leon was constantly being pulled away from you to work.
However, that man was incredibly helpful when he was home, doting on you as if you'd break at the slightest breeze. The most amazing person you could ever ask for.
Swollen ankles, strong food cravings, intense mood swings, horrible morning sickness which is not limited to just the morning, and the overall struggle to perform basic tasks was hard to handle, physically and emotionally. Everything would be so much better if you just had more of Leon.
Closing in on the eight-month mark, he was finally able to take leave, those months of stressing his need to be at home with you ultimately paying off in the end.
From there, you were taken care of. Everything you asked for, you got. You wanted a large pizza at three in the morning? No problem. Need help getting your socks on in the morning? You don't even need to ask. Can you get a back massage? Is that even a question?
You were never afraid to ask Leon for anything, expect for one thing. The need for this specific thing had been growing throughout your pregnancy and you weren't really expecting it to, hoping it would simply come and go. That thing that you were dreading bringing up to him was sex.
Understandably, it was a hard topic to approach, seeing as the man would treat you like expensive china. And no matter how many times he told you, that nagging voice in the back of your head was constantly whispering negative insults about yourself; you're overweight, you're too needy, you complain too much, etc.
Thinking about asking would always lead to you crying and that freaked Leon out, immediately rushing to make sure you were okay. That really only made you cry more. He was so unbelievably sweet and kind, how could you think so low of him to say no to such a simple request like sex?
You always refused to tell him why you were crying, brushing it off as hormones or maybe you just saw a video of the cutest kitten being rescued. You'd cried over similar things, so it was easy to excuse.
Though you'd been able to ignore the urge for quite some time, you couldn't ignore it forever.
The baby had you up at odd hours of the night to waddle into the bathroom, waking Leon in the process since the guy is the lightest sleeper ever. It never failed to make you cry, apologizing for waking him, to which he would just gently shush you while helping you to and from the toilet.
After one such bathroom trip, you couldn't fall back asleep, doing your best to ignore that feeling breaking away at your composure.
"Leon? Are you still awake?" You suddenly whispered, looking away from your phone to study him for any sort of movement.
"Mm.. mhm.." He breathed in through his nose as he rolled onto his side to face you, eyes squinting from the glow of your phone. "What's up baby?"
All you could do was stare, silently working up the courage to ask. Your need was too hard to ignore now, and that deep, sleepy voice of his wasn't helping. "I-... can I ask you for something?"
Leon nodded and slowly lifted himself up, resting his head in his hand as he propped himself up with his elbow. "You don't need to ask, just let me know what you need and I'll do it. Or get it."
"You have to promise me you won't laugh, okay?" You placed your phone down on your stomach, screen side down.
Leon pursed his lips, raising an eyebrow. "I promise."
"Is it-.." You paused, running one of your hands over the top of the other nervously. You didn't really think this far ahead, so forming the question was proving difficult. "Uh.. would it be weird if I asked for sex right now..?"
His soft laugh broke the silence and that only made you even more nervous. "You said you wouldn't laugh!"
"I know, I know! I'm sorry, I just think you're funny." Leon lifted himself up so he was now sitting up next to you, scooting closer in the process. "It's not weird to ask." His voice remained low and smooth, which did help calm your nerves. If only a little.
"Are you sure it's not weird? Cause I've been having urges for months and-" You were cut off by his hand suddenly grabbing yours, stopping you from fidgeting. "You've been having urges for months? And you didn't tell me?"
The question itself was definitely not meant to come off as mean, but regardless it was bringing you close to tears, bottom lip quivering as you tried to apologize once more.
"No- hey, hey c'mon.. I would never say no to you, sweetheart." He brought his hand up to stroke you cheek, wiping a stray tear away with his thumb.
"But-" You tried again only to be cut off again. "No buts. You're perfect, I love you, and I want you." He leaned over and kissed the tip of your nose before planting a tender kiss to your lips.
You gave Leon a weak smile before you let him take off your nightgown and lay you down, lifting up a bit so he could slip his pillow underneath you to cradle the small of your back. He triple checked that you were comfortable, running his hands along the swell of your belly.
Such tender touches, such sweet kisses. This man provided you with everything you could possibly want, how did you end up so lucky?
Your underwear hasn't fit you since month six and maternity underwear felt a little constricting, so you've been going without them for awhile. Leon definitely didn't mind that.
"Wanting sex for months and never asked..." He shook his head with another soft laugh, dragging his rough hands up your body to massage your swollen breasts which made you gasp. "I'll never be able to resist you."
He squeezed your breasts and pinched your nipples, letting out sounds akin to growls as he watched your milk-filled breasts leak at his ministrations. "Been wanting to play with these since you bought those pumps. Making me jealous of them."
His gravely voice was hitting all the right spots in your brain. "Leon.. please.." You whined, biting at your bottom lip in a poor attempt to hide your increased sensitivity.
"So pretty for me. Always so beautiful." He bent over you, careful of your stomach, to bring one of your nipples into his mouth. The vibration of his moan made you cry out, hands flying into his hair. He sucked and swirled his tongue around it, eyebrows furrowed as he concentrated.
Leon pulled off with a loud pop, swallowing with a sigh before moving over to your other nipple, repeating the process over. By the time he was done taking his fill of your milk, you were a crying, drooling mess. You gave up hiding your pitiful noises as soon as you started trying.
"Tastes so good.." Leon groaned, giving both of your nipples one last harsh suck before kissing his way down your stomach to your dripping pussy.
For a brief moment you were embarrassed at the fact that you hadn't shaved, you hadn't been able to since your stomach masked the view that you needed. Yet, he said nothing but the sweetest things as he stroked through your folds with his finger, bringing it into his mouth before quickly descending between your legs.
He groaned into your cunt, lapping at your entrance and clit like it was the last thing he'd ever do. You were soaked, he couldn't just pass up getting a good taste of you.
"Fuck! Leon- ah~!" You moaned as he sucked on your clit, making sure he paid extra attention to it. He sat back on his legs with a content sigh, giving your pussy a few extra rubs with his fingers before sinking the entirety of his middle finger into you. Before you knew it, he was stretching you with two. "Couldn't fuck you without giving this neglected pussy a little extra attention.."
He was so skillful with his fingers, stretching you out like it was an art, but you were desperate to have him deep in you, aching to your core. "N-no more-.. gah.. I need more.. please Leon..."
"Yeah? You need more?" Leon cooed, thrusting his fingers in you a few more times before slowly pulling them out. "Need my cock deep in that cunt?" Feeling him grind his dick against your slick folds was torture. He knew just how badly you needed it and he *still* decided to tease you.
"Yes! Please! God, please.." Your moan fell to a whimper as he carefully pushed the tip of his dick into you, pausing for a moment to rub the tops of your thighs as they trembled with your orgasm. "Poor thing, just feels that good huh?"
One of Leon's hands on your face brought you to open your eyes again. You didn't even realize you started crying until he wiped them from your temple. You could only nod, leaning your head against his hand as he sunk deeper into you.
Once he was flush against you, you both let out a sigh, sitting still so he could caress your body. His hands felt so good against your hot skin, eyes falling back closed as he massaged your breasts for a minute.
It wasn't long before he started to thrust into you, his slow place quickly frustrating you. "Faster, Leon- ngh~.. I-.. I'm not gonna break I promise!" You whined, panting in between words.
"You're perfect." Leon wasn't going to pass up a request like that, immediately beginning to pound your sloppy cunt once his hands settled on the barely visible divots from your hips. "Feel so good around me, baby~..."
You were incredibly sensitive from already having came once and his brutal pace was bringing you close to another. He knew just what angle to hit at and just what to say to get you right back to that edge.
You felt amazing with Leon taking care of you like this. Even as your body changed, he still made you feel like the most beautiful girl in the world.
"That's it, ohhh, there ya go baby~.. Fuck that's hot.." Leon grunted as you came again, your walls clamping around him. He leaned back a bit to watch his cock disappear into your cunt as he neared his own high. "Gonna cum baby, shit, I'm gonna cum-" He spilled his seed deep inside you with a long, drawn out moan, gripping onto you tightly as his thrusts slowed to a stop.
After catching his breath, he let out an airy laugh, bending over to kiss right above your belly button before pulling out of you.
"I promised I would take care of you, didn't I?" He whispered against your skin, and you nodded with a small hum. "Right. So the next time you want me to fuck you, please don't be afraid to jump my bones."
You couldn't help but let out a laugh of your own, placing your arm over your eyes. If you knew pregnancy sex would be this good, you would've asked him ages ago.
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bimbobaggins69 · 1 year
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Fooled round & fell in love (part five)
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Eddie Munson X Female!reader
summary: you’re in love with your best friend but your best friend thinks love is for losers, choosing to sleep around rather than settle down. You’ve had enough and you’re ready to move on from your feelings, luckily you find someone who might make that possible but does Eddie really hate love as much as he leads on?
warnings: angstttt, hurt/comfort, allusions to depression, mention of reader having a ponytail, reader has some self doubt, cussing, fluffff
A/N: This took me a little longer then I wanted, I had this chapter almost completely written out but didn’t save it so when I went to change a song on Spotify and went back the whole app refreshed and everything was gone, yes, I had a mini break down lmao but wow I’m so proud of this series and I so glad to finally get the finale posted 🖤 Thank you to everyone who took the time out to read it! Also extra points if you get the twilight reference.
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“Hey baby” rings out in your ears, your stomach drops at the sight in front of you, your feet feel stuck to the floor beneath you
“What are you doing here?” Eddie says to the blonde hanging off of his neck
“You called me and told me to come over, remember?” She says as she furrows her eyebrows
“I, what?” Eddie grits out while his jaw tenses
“Cmon baby, let’s have a repeat of the other night? I can’t stop thinking about you” she wines out
You’re still stuck, so silent the girl in front of you doesn’t even recognize your presence
But once those words leave her mouth, Eddie’s looking over at you with sullen eyes, and a look you couldn’t quite place, as he does, she finally realizes they’re not alone
“Who is she?!” She spits out
“Look you really need to go!”
“What the fuck Eddie? I said who is she?” The girl growled
“Get the fuck out!” Eddie yelled out
The girl turns to look at you while she clenches her jaw
“He’s just using you! I bet he said a bunch of crap that made you feel real special, huh?”
Eddie’s eyes widen at her words
She turns around rushing out of the door slamming it, almost making the whole trailer shake
“Y/n” Eddie says taking a couple steps towards you, he can see the tears brimming in your eyes
“Babe, please let me explain that” he says trying his best to be calm
Finally you snap out of whatever daze you’re in
“I can’t believe I actually fell for your bullshit, Eddie. What was she suppose to be your round two after I left?”
“What? No, no please I don’t even know what she’s talking about!”
“Yeah, okay, I’m gunna go” you grab your keys and head for the door
“Baby-“
“Don’t call me that, I’m not your baby, we’re not even friends, I wish I never let you touch me!” You say as tears roll down your cheeks
“Y/n don’t say that, please”
You race to your car and jump in slamming the door, as you peel off, you hear Eddie yelling your name, but you couldn’t even bring yourself to look at him in the rear view mirror. On your drive home you can barely see through the tears in your eyes, it’s late so luckily the streets are dead, and all you want to do is get home and curl up in a ball and cry yourself to sleep
How could Eddie tell you all of those things knowing he invited another girl over, like you were nothing but another notch on his belt, You really felt like you two connected on a different level, you thought maybe since Eddie has known you for so long that you would be different, you would mean more to him.
The blonde girls words kept playing back in your mind
“Repeat of the other night” “I can’t stop thinking about you” “he’s just using you” “I bet he said a bunch of crap that made you feel real special, huh?”
Okay yes he dropped the L word, yes he said you were his dream girl but is that just shit he says in the throes of passion?
You felt physically sick to your stomach, but apart of you wished you heard him out, listened to what he had to say.
You weren’t sure what to feel in this moment, so many emotions pulling you in different directions, you just wanted to scream
Finally you pull up to your drive way, and make your way inside. Luckily your mom’s asleep or else she would definitely ask questions about the mascara and tears staining your face, and you just couldn’t bring yourself to talk about it. As you trudge upstairs, you make it into your room shutting your door and yanking your clothes off, all of them smelling like Eddie and you just wanted them as far away from you as possible, you throw them in your hamper and pull on a big shirt as you slide under your covers turning out the lamp on your nightstand
You toss and turn, trying your hardest to fight back tears but you can’t they flow out of you like a stream
You cry so much your chest starts to physically hurt, and in that moment you promise yourself after you get this agonizingly painful cry out, you won’t shed anymore tears for Eddie
You continue to cry until you eventually drift off to sleep.
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The next morning you wake up to your phone ringing off the hook, you look at your clock on your nightstand, the big red numbers making your eyes squint a bit before they eventually adjusted, reading 12:42 pm, you sit up and stretch as the memories of the night before play like a movie reel in your head, your stomach twists as you remember every little detail of last night, you decide to ignore the phone and head to the shower wanting to scrub the nights events off your skin.
As you wrap a towel in your hair and put your black silk robe on tying it securely to your body, you make your way back into your room, you hear the phone go off for what seems like the 5th time, as much as you just want to shut down and lock yourself inside never having to deal with anyone again, you know thats just not realistic so you hesitantly walk over to the white house phone sitting on your desk.
You clear your throat as you answer
“Hello?” It comes out way more hoarse then you would’ve liked
“Sweetheart, please don’t hang up! I need to talk to you, please” Eddie let’s out in almost a panic
“Eddie, I have nothing to say to you, lose my number” you say as tears threaten to spill again, guess that promise you made to yourself is tougher then you thought
You slam the phone back down not wanting to hear another word from him.
As you make your way to your closet to pick out some clothes, your phone rings again, and now instead of tears you’re seething “can he not take the fucking hint?” You think to yourself
“I said leave me alone!” You bark out
“Woah, what did I do?” Robin says while removing the phone from her ear and looking at it in confusion
“Oh my god, Rob I’m so sorry, I thought you were someone else” you say as you let out a deep breath and let your tense shoulders deflate back to their normal position
“And who would that be?” She says as she laughs
“It’s not that important, anyway what’s up?” You say trying to change the subject
“Well, you never called me back after the other night, and I was just wondering how everything went with you and that Randy guy? But now i’m not so sure I should’ve brought him up” she says
“Oh, yeah me and Randy aren’t really talking anymore, we just kind of decided we weren’t for each other, I guess” you say trying to sound as convincing as possible
You didn’t wanna lie to Robin, she’s your best friend but you just couldn’t go into detail about the whole situation, god you were still humiliated enough by saying Eddie’s name while Randy made you cum, but also Eddie’s friends with Steve and Steve’s friends with Robin so you didn’t wanna create awkward tension between anyone, knowing Robin would have your back if she did run into Eddie. You’ll tell her eventually but now is just not the time
“I’m sorry, babe, well you know what they say, there’s more fish in the sea and all that” she says trying to be as empathetic as possible
“Yeah, well lucky for me I don’t think I’ll be exploring the sea for a very long time” you laugh out
“Hey, how about we hang out today? Maybe go to Benny’s and grab some burgers and shakes? Forget about the burdens of our failing love lives?” She says as she wiggles her brows up and down, like you can see her through the phone
“Um, yeah that actually sounds nice, I wouldn’t mind stuffing my face with some fries and a strawberry shake” you say almost excited
“Okay, I’m gunna tell Steve and we’ll be on our way to pick you up, say around 3:30?”
“Kay, I’ll see you then”
As you hang up you start to overthink, what if Eddie shows up, what if Eddie’s already told Steve, what if, after what if, and now you are almost tempted to call Robin back and cancel, but you know you can’t, you already made plans
Finally you walk back over to your closet and pick out your outfit for the day which consisted of high waisted jeans, a white tank top and a cropped leather moto jacket, you make your way into your bathroom to throw on as little makeup as possible just a little something to cover up the redness from a night of crying, you decide to just pull your hair into a ponytail on top of your head, leaving bangs and some face framing pieces out, you slip some sneakers on and after your finished you make your way downstairs, to watch some tv until Robin and Steve get there
After about an hour of mindlessly flipping through channels and finally landing on music videos on MTV, you hear a car pull up in your driveway, you walk over to the window peaking out, to see Steve’s bmw. You grab your bag, turn the tv off and head out the front door.
“Hey, there she is” Steve says with a smile
“Hey guys, thank you for picking me up” you say as you slide in the back seat
“Don’t mention it” Steve and Robin say in unison
“It really creeps me out when you guys do that” you say as you stifle a laugh
Steve shoots a playful glare at you in the rear view mirror, and you can’t help but to giggle, which in turn makes Steve laugh
“So” Robin says “do you need me and Stevie here to beat this Randy guy up?” She says as she looks back at you, and you wonder if she can tell you’ve been crying
“No, Randy’s not my problem” you say without giving that statement much thought
“You sure?” Steve says looking at you again in the rear view mirror almost trying to read your face
“Guys, I’m fine can we just go pig out, please?” You beg
“Fine, fine let’s go” Robin says as Steve puts the car into reverse and backs out of your driveway
Once you walk into Benny’s with Steve to your right and Robin to your left, you are greeted with a waitress who tells you to sit any where you’d like, so you all opt for your usual booth in the back. its pretty big as it almost wraps around the whole table, being able to sit up to at least 6 people.
You all scoot into the booth and begin talking about god knows what, it’s more Steve and Robin talking while you get lost in thought but pretend to listen as you nod your head to the little words you catch here and there.
But your ears perk up when you hear Steve mention Eddie’s name, Robin asked where he was and that we should’ve invited him, but Steve says he had some business to take care of, whatever that means.
Before you’re able to get back to your thoughts the waitress is asking if you’re ready with your orders, she’s tapping her foot and chewing her gum as she waits for Robin to decide whether she wants fries or onion rings. Once the orders are put in, Steve and Robin go back to their normal chatter and banter, while you butt in every once in awhile. You’ve never felt like this before almost too stuck in your head, like it’s almost impossible to follow through with a whole conversation. After everyone’s done eating, you’re ready to head back home and maybe hide out in your room for another couple of days, this was too much human interaction for you and you just wanted to be alone with your thoughts. Once you all are finished eating you split the bill and head back out to Steve’s car, as Robin gets in the front seat, Steve stops you
“Listen, Eddie told me what happened and as a friend to a friend I really think you should hear him out y/n” he says with doe eyes you almost feel like he’s trying to play this up for Eddie, make you feel bad so you’ll talk to him
“I really don’t have anything to say to him Steve, I mean I don’t know what he told you but what he did was really fucked up”
“Yeah he told me” he says nodding his head
Your eyes widen a bit
“Like everything?” You say as you look down
“Well I mean he didn’t go into detail if thats what you’re asking but I mean I know enough” he says
“And you don’t think thats fucked? Telling me he’s in love with me and then inviting another girl over? Like who does that?”
“I don’t think that’s exactly what happened y/n”
“Okay so what did happen Steve?” You say as you start to get annoyed
“I don’t know but Eddie wouldn’t do that to you, I’m just saying you should hear him out” he says as he heads back to his side of the car, opening the door and getting in, leaving you there as you stair at the ground, lost in thought. After a few seconds you make your way to the car and slide into the backseat
“Is everything okay?” Robin says as she looks from you to Steve
“Yup, everything’s fine” you say as Steve nods in agreement
Once they pull up to the curb in front of your house, you thank them and tell Robin you’ll talk to her later. You head inside greeting your mom who’s just got home from work, you tell her about your day and listen to her latest work gossip, and then you head up to your room, once inside you take off your jacket and jeans and leave your white tank top on and slip on some black cotton shorts. As you sit in bed you realize how exhausted you feel and decide to take a nap, and maybe deal with the whole “listening to Eddie” situation later
As you drift off to sleep you can’t help but to dream of Eddie, his face, his hands, his lips, god you wanted to hate him, but this was physically taking so much out of you, you were still so irrevocably in love with him
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The sounds of tapping wake you up from the best nap of your life. Once your eyes open and adjust to the darkness you hear the tapping again, as you sit up you realize it’s coming from your window, you stand up making your way over but as you look down into your driveway your breath hitches as you see Eddie releasing another rock into the air, as it hits the glass you flinch and back up, debating if you want to shut your curtains and go back to bed, but the conversation with Steve is still fresh in your mind, so without giving it a second thought you open your window
“Eddie, what are you doing here?” You hissed
“Come outside, please!” He yells back
“Eddie go home!” At this point you want him to beg before you hear him out
And almost like he read your mind, he yells back
“Please y/n, five minutes just give me five minutes!”
You close your window and go downstairs, throwing on the sneakers you wore earlier, as you head outside you see Eddie leaning against his van with a cigarette perched in his mouth, when he sees you he looks at you with the saddest eyes, as you get closer it almost looks like he’s been crying
“Your five minutes start now” you say as you fold your arms over your chest
“Okay, well what happened last night was not what you think, I never invited Becky over” he cries out
“Oh that’s her name” you think to yourself
“She said I called her and invited her over, and that was bullshit” he says as he fiddles with the cigarette in his hand
“Okay so enlighten me Eddie, what did happen?” You say a little condescending
“I spent all fucking day trying to figure that out, and after talking to a few people, I found out Becky and Randy are friends, like they definitely run in the same circle and what I believe happened is Randy asked her to come over and say that I invited her, how he knew you were there I don’t know, but I promise you sweetheart, I would never do some shit like that, not to you, everything I told you last night, I’ve been wanting to tell you for years but I was too stupid and too pussy. But that aside, I would never do anything, anything to lose you! Fuck y/n I mean I’ve never felt this way before and after last night I can’t even imagine being with anyone else. I don’t think my dick could get hard for anyone but you, now”
You roll your eyes at that
“Real romantic, Munson” you retort
“I’m serious” he says as he takes a step closer to you
You don’t move as he takes a couple more steps closer now standing directly in front of you, you’re looking up into his eyes trying to scan it for any bullshit, but all you see is sincerity and that makes your stomach flutter
“Okay, your five minutes are up” you whisper up to him as he looks down at you starring into your eyes
“Cmon y/n you have to believe me” he whispers back, as the hand without the cigarette comes up to cup your cheek, he’s surprised when you don’t make a move to pull away
“I do believe you” you whisper back as tears fill your water line
“But I don’t know, eddie” you say as you shake your head “I mean if we do this, what if you realize I’m not enough? What if you get bored? I can’t compete with all those girls, and that lifestyle” you say as the tears begin to fall
Eddie wipes them away with his thumb as his own tears threaten to spill
“Baby, you’re so much more than enough, you don’t have to compete with shit, because there is no competition, I want you, I’ve already had that and now I just want you, I want you to be mine”
“I have one more question” you spit out almost not thinking before you said it
“Yeah, anything?” Eddie says while nodding his head
“What did she mean by, I bet he said some crap that made you feel special? What did you tell her?” You say almost too nervous to hear the answer
Eddie let’s out a deep breath before he begins talking
“I’m gonna be honest with you, absofuckinglutely nothing, we barely talked I fucked her for a total of maybe four minutes, before I pretended to cum so she could get the fuck out of there. The only reason I went home with her was because I wanted to see if you’d get jealous maybe show me some kind of reaction but you were too busy cozied up to Randy boy, and then when I took her back to my place, I regretted it cause all I could think about was you. I really wanted to pull you off of his lap and drag you back home and teach you fucking lesson, god when I showed up to your house and seen you in that little outfit I had an instant hard on, I wanted to tell you how I felt then, but when you told me you were seeing someone I didn’t wanna ruin it for you no matter how jealous I was”
His words make your heart soar, you can’t believe you spent all night crying over something you shouldn’t have been crying over, now you felt like it was your turn to grovel
“I’m sorry, Eddie. I should’ve heard you out instead of assuming the worst” you say as you wrap your arms around his waste and put your chin on his chest
“S’kay baby, I’m just glad we’re okay, I’ve been a fucking wreck since last night”
“Me too” you say as you both laugh at each others sheer stupidity
“Hey do you wanna go for a drive or something?” He says looking at you with a glint of hope in his eyes
“Mm, I don’t know if I should” you say as you look back at your house, debating whether it’s a good idea
But when you look back into his doe eyes you can’t say no
“You know what, fuck it, yeah let’s go” you say with a smirk
“That’s my girl” he says back with his signature mischievous grin
my girl
I could get use to that.
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epilogue
THANK YOU FOR READING
PLEASE COMMENT AND REBLOG 🖤
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2K notes · View notes
bat-writer · 11 months
Note
Bruce doting on a pregnant batmom 🥰 (I might have sent this twice sorry but if so I still hope you have a wonderful day/evening/night ❤️)
A/N: Yes. THATS all just Y E S - I may have gone overboard LMAO
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 ‿̩͙‿ ༺ ♰ ༻ ‿̩͙‿  ‿‿ ༺ ♰ ༻ ‿̩͙‿
Probably has a hunch way before you. This is Batman/Bruce Wayne. He know your cycle, signs and symptoms and all!
One day he came into your bedroom with some breakfast in bed and a small plastic wrapping
“What is it?” You asked
“A test. It’s been a week since your period should have been here. don’t be nervous or afraid we’ll talk it over with the results” he didn’t want it to sound like a business transaction but he wanted it to be a serious conversation
If it was negative or positive he’d be there with open arms and full support. Whatever your choice may be.
You step out of the bathroom with no emotion on your face and walk over to him. You place a kiss to his lips and whisper
“We’re having a baby” with a grin. His large arms coming around your frame to embrace you in a strong but gentle hug. Was it planned? No. Was this the best news he could hear all day? Absolutely! The woman he loves carrying his child is just beautiful to him.
Goes downstairs to tell Alfred about the news and has him set up a doctors appointment as soon as possible to get everything in order
During the first trimester you thought he might secretly be a caretaker. From morning sickness, to fatigue, to even your aches and pains he found some kind of solution for it all. He started to move things around the manor to make space and to start planning a nursery.
He would have a tape measure to measure your stomach each week to see the growth
"Honey, I won't be showing until I'm at least 3 1/2 weeks" you giggle
"I'm telling you the bump in right there! You just cant see it because your breasts are swelling" he tried to defend, when in fact they have not grown yet
During your second trimester he tried to crack down on crime as much as physically possible for your new addition
Speaking of new additions, he had to inform the rest of his family about who would be the newest Wayne. First up with Jason and Dick.
“Congrats you two!” Was Dicks response and of course Jason says
“…you still do it at your age-“ dick hit him in the ribs to not ruin the moment.
Either way, they were both happy for you and let you both know if anything is needed. They were there to lend a hand. The only other person left now was to tell Damien. Luckily Damien had a liking to you. However, when he had first gotten to the manor, he had his clashes with a dick so he doesn’t know how exactly he’d react to a new baby. 
He also would secretly ask them to right down any kinds of foods or combos you liked so he could always have them handy
“As long as it stays out of my space It wouldn’t really matter. And as long as Y/N is okay with it…” it was his own unique way of saying as long as you were happy, he was happy
Damien also made it habit to be around the same area as you when Bruce was out and Alfred was busy. You even asked him once if he wanted to feel the developing bump. He did and for a spilt second you could tell he was a bit flustered. After he had his fill he’d move and tell you some fact about your state in the pregnancy
Also his way of showing he cared
Bruce’s favorite thing was to watch you sleep in the morning and watch as you’re bummed rose and fell from every breath that you took. He also really love to watch you walk away because you’re starting to get a slight waddle from the new center of gravity on your body it was adorable.
He also loves when you have his shirt on and the slight bump that stretches the fabric so slightly
Hes on the verge of banning you from the Batcave and watching the computer. It gets pretty chilly down there. He doesn’t want you or the baby getting cold. Even though you told me you were fine and you have three blankets on you but because he loves you so much he loves his stay there.
Speaking of, missions is the only time he’s constantly in communication with you to make sure that you are right which also means Alfred is constantly being called to check in on you. But he did love coming home and taking a nice warm shower with you and feeling your bump
He gets a new glimmer in his eyes when the baby starts to kick and move more. There was one time the baby had a big stretch. It was a little scary but also fascinating and slightly painful 😭
He’ll give you the entire bed just so you could be comfortable!
Lots of massages and kisses. Anything he can relive for you! He’s also restricted you!
No bag carrying, no going up the stairs (had tried to instal one of those chairs to take you up and down), no bending down to get something, no kitchen knives, etc.
He wanted you to just be pregnant💀but you just could not love that way! So he lets you help with very SMALL things
He has also gone overboard on baby clothes, accessories, and just anything baby!
Has 2 cribs one in the nursery and one in your bedroom.
He organized your baby shower and just made it soft, elegant and beautiful. Gender is left as a surprise since he’d want to keep any media as far from you as possible
Sometimes feels guilt when he sees your struggling with pains he can’t really take away. Like when you experienced a Braxton hick he was reminded of what you would soon go through when it was the baby’s due date but he’s also reminded that he will be father once again tk a new baby.
This time he’ll be there from the very start.
Oh he’s also booked you the best suit in the hospital with only the best doctor and midwife. He knows sometimes hospitals can be inconsiderate of their patients so he wants only the best in securing your safety and the baby’s
He helps to pack your bag for when you go into labor. While you go through it all you hold up the tiny clothing that will soon be filled by a tiny version of you or him! At one point you do get a bit emotional and overwhelmed
It was a lot
You’re going to be a mother, you’re gonna push a baby out, there was A LOT more than just having a cute baby. Feedings, doctors, loosing sleep, all of that so you cousins help but cry. Bruce put everything down and came over to you and inlet in front of you
“Hey, hey, it’s okay…..I can’t lie to you and say it’ll be easy as pie. But I can promise you I will be there for you both always. Anytime you need help, a break or just need me there. I’m always here for you both” he said placing a kiss to your bump and one to your ring finger where your ring sits
He wipes your tears away and kisses your head. You finish packing the bag and set it aside. You snuggle into Bruce’s side and lay in comfortable silence
In this bed Bruce was holding the love of his life and the product of their love that grows inside of her
-kitty🐈‍⬛
- part 2???👀
453 notes · View notes
youunravelme · 8 months
Note
hiiii congrats 🥳 so amazing!! you’re amazing!! love seeing you on my dash/notifs and especially your fics!! they’re amazing
only if you have time, but could you do “I saved a piece for you.” with mat <3
i know we don't really talk, BUT ILYSM! your writing always brings a smile to my face!!
this got out of hand, but here ya go!
mat knew you were a hopeless romantic, it was one of the reasons he fell in love with you. the way you sobbed when watching the end of 27 dresses despite it being a very upbeat and happy ending or the way you squealed and thanked him a million times every time he so much as came home with a bouquet of flowers.
you made it easy for him to be a good boyfriend, your very reactions to his love made him only want to love you even more.
"babe?" he walked through the front door, ready to be accosted by your warm hug.
but it never came.
mat furrowed his brows and walked further into your apartment. he found you standing in your bedroom, throwing the clothes you packed across the room while you cried.
"baby, what's wrong?" mat hurried across the room to pull you into his arms but you shrieked and pulled away.
"stay away!" you cried. "i'm sick."
mat stopped, even though he wanted nothing more than to hold you, but not at the risk of upsetting you even further. "talk to me, how can i help you? what's going on?"
you collapsed face first into bed and sobbed. "stupid martha came to work when she was sick and got me sick. so i can't go to the wedding with you, mat. i'm sorry."
mat was quick to sit down next to you and start rubbing your back. "it's okay, i'll just tell ethan we can't make it and--"
you sat up immediately. "no! you're going mathew barzal."
"i can't just leave you here."
you set him with a hard look. "you can and will. i'll get a friend to help me, but you need to be with ethan on his big day." you cried a little more. "just promise me you'll eat some cake, diet be damned."
mat rolled his eyes but a smile was playing on his lips. "it's just cake, babe."
you scoffed. "no, wedding cake is the best cake because it tastes like love and promises and commitment and cherishing the one you adore." if you didn't look so serious, mat would've laughed at how stopped up you sounded.
"okay, if you say so," he conceded.
"i'm glad you see it my way." you paused. "you know what this means, right? me being sick?" mat shook his head. "you can't sleep in here tonight."
he scoffed and pulled you into his chest before placing kisses up and down your neck. "like hell i am, i'm sleeping in our bed with you."
you eventually acquiesced that night, but not without establishing a pillow wall between the two of you (which mat discarded quickly after you fell asleep.
the next morning, he let you sleep while he gathered his things and headed for the airport, leaving his entire heart back in new york.
ethan was the one who picked him up from the airport, and he immediately asked where you were. when mat explained the situation, his friend seemed a bit bummed, more so for mat than anyone else.
"god, i couldn't imagine leaving my fiance at home while i was in another country."
mat blinked. "you do that literally all season long."
but ethan shrugged him off.
when the day of the wedding came, mat's hands felt empty. usually, at the other weddings you'd attended together, you were attached at the hip. mat had a hand on you at all times. though, if he was being fair, his physical touch was not exclusive to weddings and parties.
he couldn't help but think of you in every decoration, every song that was played. he could picture you now wearing the dress you picked out for that very occasion. he could see you walking down the aisle towards him wearing the ring that was currently sitting in his bedside table drawer.
after his speech, mat stepped outside and dialed your number. it rang three times before you picked up.
"mat?" god he loved the sound of your voice.
"hey baby, how're you feeling?"
"i'm fine, have you eaten the cake? how did lenasia look? was she gorgeous? i bet she was beautiful."
he laughed into the phone. "you sound like you're feeling better."
"a little, i miss you though."
"i'll be home tomorrow, i promise. and then we can enjoy the rest of the off season together. how does that sound?"
"sounds like heaven."
the wedding continued on, with mat sneaking a slice of cake to take home to you. he partied, but hated you weren't there to dance to some cheesy ed sheeran love song. he laughed at jokes, but wondered what you would've found funny. he watched ethan and his wife dance together and couldn't help himself from messing with his ring finger on his left hand, wondering what it would feel like to feel cold metal there.
"you okay, barzy?" ethan must've stepped away from the dance floor while mat was zoning out.
he smiled. "never better."
"but you miss her," ethan supplied.
"but i miss her." mat shrugged. "i'll see her tomorrow though."
"is she feeling any better?"
mat nodded. "she's fine now, hates that she missed it."
"it happens," ethan said. "besides, i'm sure we'll see her when you two get married." mat flushed. "that's still the plan right? next month?"
"next month."
ethan smiled and slapped his friend in the shoulder. "best decision you'll ever make."
mat flew home the next day. he politely took a few photos with fans, but for the most part sprinted out of the airport just to get home to you.
he couldn't drive fast enough. couldn't get enough green lights. the elevator up to your penthouse felt too slow.
but it was worth it when he opened the door and saw you wearing his sweatshirt (that had mysteriously gone missing two weeks ago) watching yet another rom com.
he didn't even say hello. didn't greet you. he just sat his bag down and pulled out some tupperware and held it out to you.
"i saved a piece for you," he said.
your eyes watered until you jumped off the couch and into his arms. "i love you i love you i love you!" you exclaimed before taking the cake from him and diving into it. you moaned at the rich flavors before smiling at him. "this is so fucking good. isn't wedding cake the best?"
mat shrugged. "their cake was decent, but i bet ours will be better."
283 notes · View notes
call-me-copycat · 2 months
Note
Hey! Idk if you still write fics but if you do. Could you please write about Aizawa having a daughter who selfharms, but he didnt knew until one day he entered to her room and find her doing it?.
Its kind of an emergency so i would really apreciate if you wrote it 🩷
Hi! I'm really sorry for the slight delay, I've been bouncing between school during the day and work at night, so even though I saw your ask I couldn't physically write it due to exhaustion (⑉ ᷄ ⌳ ᷅ )ก
That being said, even though it's been a couple days I didn't want to leave you hanging! I got some rest and wrote as much as I could in one sitting!
I really do hope this helps, feel free to message me anytime if you need to vent or such ₍ᐢ‥ᐢ₎ ♡
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What I Owe To You
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*I listened to this on loop while writing*
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➤ Welcome - Introduction and Request Rules (Requests are open + Some info about me)
▶ Characters: Just Aizawa and Reader
▶ Genre: Comfort + Slight Angst
▶ Summary: As the ask states
▶ Word Count: 2925
▶ WARNINGS:
- Self harm
- Depressive thoughts
- Overall lots of angst
Please don't read if any of this makes you uncomfortable!
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The cycle always went on.
At this point you were afraid of what was to happen next. At the same time, the thought was pushed away by the constant emptiness that filled you through. The sticky tar-like hands of this unknown void ravaged your mind, shredding it apart piece by piece.
Leaving you constantly feeling... Hollow. It was difficult to describe it as anything else.
You walked to school everyday and went to your classes. You sat next to your classmates as they animatedly discussed the usual topics of training and what to do after school.
On the weekends, you slept. Sometimes went shopping with your father. Maybe you'd get visited by your Uncle Mic, other times you'd train.
There wasn't much variety. It was suffocating. These feelings had no place to spawn from, as your life wasn't much different from everyone else's. There didn't seem to be a reason, for all you knew. But it was there, no doubt about it. It made itself known.
-
It was a usual Friday night. You had completed all your classes and had the weekend to yourself. It felt pointless, there wasn't much to do. Nor did you have the energy for anything either.
Sitting in your room, you jumped a bit at the unexpected knock on your door. You had been gazing out of your bedroom window for who knew how long, zoning out as far from your mind as you could. You vaguely remembered that a storm was to come soon.
"Dinnertime. Wash up and come to the table when you're ready."
Your father's voice never failed to comfort you, and in a way he was one of the main beacons of light in your dark and foggy world. An unchanging pillar of strength, he held on tight to your cracking mind.
Slowly, tiredly, you made your way out of your room. As you passed by Aizawa, he couldn't help but sigh in response to your barely-there smile at him. You had a habit of doing that, possibly to keep him from worrying.
Truth be told, Aizawa always worried about you. Ever since you were young, he was on guard every second, trying to keep you from falling and scraping your knees, to keeping an eye on you during training.
Though recently, he had noticed some... changes. Your eyes began to grow dull, and their usual energy faded with each passing day. The bags under them grew more prominent, and in turn your hair began to be left more of a mess. Slowly, little things were building up, and he couldn't tell why.
It worried him sick, since the only thing he had in mind for you was for you to be happy and safe. Seeing your condition worsen with each day made him nauseous, as it was the last place he wanted you to be at. He wanted to help you, the best he could.
So that's why before you even sat down to eat, he began to question you.
"Are you feeling okay, [Name?]"
Truth be told, he knew you'd say you were fine. He just needed to soothe his frantic mind.
Looking up at him, you gave him another smile. He couldn't help but grimace at how forced it looked.
"Oh, of course I'm fine." You clenched your jaw at how unenthusiastic you sounded, but it would have to do.
Aizawa only felt uneasy. Too many things added up and gave him a weird taste in his mouth to leave it at that.
"Look at me, [Name]."
The unusual tone of his voice brought you out of your foggy state of mind as you looked up at him fully. Once you met his eyes properly, Aizawa took notice of the... Saddened expression that filled yours. He knew someone was wrong, but it was being covered.
"You'd tell me if something was wrong, right?"
He needed to know if you trusted him. He needed to be the one person you trusted in life. This was all or nothing.
Your eyes went wide for a split second as your breath hitched, but you quickly shook it off. His bluntness was what caught you off guard.
"Really, it's nothing Papa." You tried smiling once more, raising a hand out a bit in an attempt to calm him. You knew it was a pitiful attempt, but you didn't have the energy to make it convincing. Alongside that, Aizawa was generally a very tough man to fool. It'd take a lot to actually pass anything through him.
Aizawa's eyes narrowed in response as he saw your reaction to his question. Your body language indicated how uncomfortable you were, and he didn't want to push you too far past your limits.
It was tough, but he decided to give it up in the end and hope you'd come to him whenever you were ready. You always shared everything with him since you were young, and he had gained a large amount of trust over you in turn.
-
Dinner was eaten in silence, and as soon as it was over you bid your father a goodnight before heading off to your room.
Aizawa stayed seated at the kitchen table as he watched you walk off, wondering what was happening to his child. He couldn't bear the thought of you struggling with something alone. He had been there your whole life to help you get through everything you passed by, so why weren't you letting him in now?
After much deliberation, he got up from his spot at the table and made his way to your room. He needed to finish this conversation, and he needed to know what was going on. His mind had been sprawled all over the place for the last few months, as he'd been observant enough to catch on to the smallest changes you went through. Seeing you go into such a decline was like a punch straight through to his heart.
His mind was in such a haze that he threw open your door without second thought, seeing as he normally takes care to knock first. The room was pitch black, but based off of the startled gasp that came from you and the clanging of metal hitting the ground, Aizawa felt his blood freeze in fear.
Quickly flipping on the light, his eyes widened at the site that laid in front of him. You didn't have any time to cover yourself, so Aizawa saw it all.
The bandages laid out.
The blades.
And most importantly, your cuts.
You felt your eyes water at the expression on your father's face, guilt and self-loathing bleeding into your mind.
Aizawa was stuck in shock for a moment. It felt as though all time was warped as he saw what was his worst nightmare laid out in front of him. He was quickly snapped back to reality at the sound of your sobs that echoed throughout the room.
He swiftly made his way towards you from across your room, and in one smooth movement he pulled you into his lap, hugging you tightly to himself.
He had known something was wrong, felt it deep in his heart, but he didn't realize how serious it truly was. His heart ached for you as his grip only grew tighter around you. Aizawa didn't want you to hide these things from him, and in a way, he felt disappointed at your lack of trust towards him. All his disappointment and anger quickly dissipated, leaving him to face his worry and guilt.
"[Name]..."
He could hear his voice tremble, but couldn't care less.
"Why? I-" He was stuck in shock. It was something he never thought he'd run into. Looking down at you, his worry for your well-being grew tenfold, but he gathered the willpower to overcome the sudden surge of emotions he was feeling.
"I want... I need you to promise me you'll never harm yourself again," He looked down at you, cradled in his arms, "I don't think I could ever bear the pain of losing you..."
He knew this was only one step of many. That it doesn't start like this. That it grows. Although he couldn't pinpoint what might've started it, he at least needed to confirm you'd be safe. He just needed this one thing to give his already worn heart a little bit of ease.
You couldn't help but recoil a bit, bringing your arms to hug your torso. As much as you wanted it to be that easy, as much as you wanted to tell your father 'okay!', you knew it wouldn't be done so fast. And in a way, that only worsened your resentment towards yourself.
"I... don't know if I can.." You avoided his gaze as you faced the ground, hating how saddened he was and much rather preferring him to be angry. It'd lessen the guilt a little bit, at least.
He needed something.
"[Name]... I can't make you promise me you'll be able to stop right away. That's foolish to believe." Heaving out a sigh, he put a hand atop your head. "But I just need you to know that I'd be devastated without you. I can truly say from the bottom of my heart, I'd never be able to live a normal life again if you were gone."
Looking up into his eyes, you saw a heaviness that swirled in them. This was coming from a man who had seen it all - numerous deaths in ways he wished he could unsee.
You hadn't realized just how much you meant to him. It never popped up in your head. The all-consuming void had blocked any sensibility or logic from getting to you, and the more you thought about it, the more you realized just how much it would affect your father. He always told you your pain was his to deal with too.
Settling your face in the crook of his neck so you wouldn't have to see the hurt in his eyes anymore, you tried your best to explain everything to him.
"It feels..." Closing your eyes, you tried imagining everything that has built up. "Like I'm running a race, yet getting nowhere. That everything I do has no effect... I'm tired."
You stayed silent as you felt your father put a hand on the back of your head. Aizawa watched as you carefully pieced your words together, and saw the true effect of everything you had been dealing with. His heart ached to relieve you of your pain, his fatherly instincts screaming at him to help save his child.
"[Name]." His grip on you tightened ever so slightly. "I want you to get this through your head, alright? You are not a failure. You're going through a lot, and it's weighing down on you. And I understand you're under a lot of pressure, but-"
Aizawa was cut off when he began to choke up, the thoughts too much for him to bear. As much as he tried to keep his composure for your sake, his walls were beginning to crack.
You heard your father pause and looked up at him, only to be brought into shock at the sight of your normally stoic father tearing up. You felt ashamed for forgetting about his pain, tearing up once more at the guilt that ravaged your mind.
He could see how surprised you were, but he couldn't help it. He always struggled to contain himself when it came to you, especially whenever you were hurt. He hated seeing you in pain.
"Do you have any idea what it would do to me if I lost you? I- ... [Name], if anything happened to you, I don't know what I'd do anymore, I'd-"
He truly couldn't help it. All that Aizawa wanted was for you to be happy. Seeing you in so much agony... seeing your only escape being to harm yourself... He felt that he lost a part of himself.
You cried out loud this time, seeing your father so torn over you. It was heartbreaking, but oddly soothing at the same time. To have someone to deeply care about you that they felt intertwined with you. He cared.
You could feel his arms engulfing you, and you allowed yourself to be swallowed in his hold. It was warm and soothing... A stark contrast to the cold you constantly couldn't escape from.
As he held you, Aizawa couldn't help but be more shocked at himself than anyone. He normally was able to easily retain his composure, so as he felt tears flowing down his face he couldn't help but stiffen. Quickly getting over it, he held you close. The room gradually began to get quieter, the both of your emotions slowing down.
You couldn't help but feel... Secure. It was a stark contrast to the constant void you felt. You felt... Warm.
Yeah, warm.
It was a nice feeling.
Closing your eyes, you finally allowed your body to relax. Aizawa rubbed your back as he gently rocked back and forth.
"I just want you to breath. Don't think about anything else."
Following his word, you kept your eyes closed and settled your breathing. You quickly noticed how much easier it was to think this way. Nothing else was getting in the way, no unwanted thoughts or fears, and you felt safe. Safe and comfortable.
The world around you normally was so chaotic. It seemed everyone was in a rush, always somewhere to be. You couldn't have time to yourself either, constantly getting pushed to and fro. There never seemed to be a place to stop. Nowhere to rest. An unchanging race.
But here you were. The world has stopped, giving you a break you so badly needed. You couldn't describe it, but such a simple hug from your father seemed to dull everything that pained you.
"I understand what it's like."
Aizawa would be lying if he said he was never in your place before. Too many nights he was kept up, worrying about working on himself. Scared of the changing future. Feeling like nothing was changing for him while the world moved on. It was isolating.
Over the years, he got better. The world's rush blurred to background noise, and he learned to appreciate his own speed in life. It was his own life he was living, after all.
Looking down at you, he saw a mirror image of himself.
"Y'know, it's not fair..." You looked up at him as he brushed away a lone tear from your cheek with the pad of his thumb. "You allow me to laugh with you in your happiest moments... So why do you lock me out when you're at your lowest?"
You had never heard it phrased like that before. You did enjoy having him around whenever you had something good to share. Whenever you were proud, or amazed, or just plain happy. But you understood, he wanted to be a part of it all. Every smile... And every tear.
Your voice couldn't find you, but Aizawa didn't mind. To you, he was always a hand outstretched. A guide to help you through the fog and the dark. It made the terrifying a little less daunting.
"Please talk to me when you can. Tell me whatever you'd like, I just want to know how you're feeling."
You nodded, looking at him directly. Your heart rate had gone down significantly, and you didn't know how much time had passed. If you listened carefully, you could hear the distance rumble of an oncoming storm, thunder booming on the horizon.
There was a pregnant pause before he started once more.
"Tomorrow, we'll need to get your injuries looked over-"
Seeing a look of fear cross your expression, he was quick to calm you.
"I'll be with you. The entire time. You won't have to deal with living life alone. I understand it's frightening to look at, but let me hold some of the weight you own."
You watched as Aizawa stretched out his hand, offering it to you. Looking at it, you thought back to all the times he'd helped you in the past. Every time he's offered his hand out to you.
All the times you were too scared to cross the road when you were little. Every time you felt too suffocated by the number of people surrounding you. Or even when it was just the two of you, silently walking home together in the warm afternoon sun.
He always offered you support, for every little thing life had to throw at you. Aizawa's expression softened when you gently put your hand in his, no hesitation in your movements.
Clasping his fingers over yours, you saw how your hands intertwined. And you realized, he was always there to take some of the pain from you - acting like he was a part of you.
"You get it now, huh?" Looking up into his eyes one more time, you thought you saw a sparkle in them. "Whenever you bring pain to yourself," He squeezed your hand a little tighter, "you're hurting me right alongside with you. I need you in one piece, kid."
You breathed out, everything a little clearer now. There was so much more to do. So much to go through. It was a formidable thought.
But as you looked up into your father's eyes and as you felt his hand in yours, you realized;
You weren't alone.
You really did owe him the world.
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During my lowest moments, Aizawa was always a huge character I relied on to get me through it. I will always write comfort for him to anyone who asks.
I hope you have a lovely day, and I hope things get just a little easier for you, you definitely deserve it (*´艸`)フフフッ♡
➜ Please let me know if I missed any warnings/triggers in the tags or in the opening!
122 notes · View notes
lynnlovesspidahman · 9 months
Text
this is me trying.
peter parker x reader
part 2. || part 1.
masterlist.
warnings : angst, mentions of violence, swearing, lots of self-doubt (peter im sorry)
word count : 2.7k
summary : There’s always two sides to a story. An apology is put into place.
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Peter felt like he was living three different lives at once.
Each taking so, so much energy every single day.
His job, an assistant for Dr. Octavius at Octavius Industries. He felt guilty for arriving late every day, and still somehow having a job.
Peter was smarter than Doc, they both knew that. So that meant he would be called to office very, very often.
Usually because of some mistake Doc had made while working on the new prototypes of prosthetic limbs.
But the pressure it brought could get to be too much sometimes. One small mistake could cost millions of lives — or dollars — if not noticed early enough.
But he knew it would help the world someday, in so many ways. The exhaustion was totally worth it.
Spider-Man. Peter had loved and genuinely enjoyed playing his alter-ego.
Constantly, day and night, he was out. Out saving people everywhere. Sure, his work wasn’t appreciated by everyone but it was 100% worth it — to him.
But Spider-Man came with considerable costs. His everlasting lack of sleep. Peter can’t remember the last time he really got his 8 hours. The bags under his eyes made that apparent enough.
The physicality of the job, how many times had he stopped a car with his bare hands? He lost count years ago.
The bruises, cuts, broken limbs, brought immense pain, even to Spider-Man. Sure, he can heal faster — a nights rest, a heating pad, and your some soup is more than enough — But that doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt.
And the emotional weight it brought.
The crimes haven’t slowed, if anything they’ve gotten much more prominent all around the city.
The overwhelming amount of times he has to swing across New York to fight off large groups of thugs has become too much.
And honestly, he’s so sick of it.
And so, Peter stopped pulling his punches as much.
The guilt didn’t come until later.
He climbed through your apartment’s window after a long, long night of patrol.
You were sitting there — unaware of his presence— watching TV, all cuddled up on the corner of the couch with your mini Spidey plush.
“Hey, beautiful.” He called out to you.
“Holy shit-” You jumped and turned around to look at him. “You can’t just pop out of nowhere like that, you scared the hell out of me.”
You got up and walked towards him, “Was patrol okay?”
“Uh, yeah it was alright, kicked my ass tonight though. I’m worn out,” He stretched his arms above his head.
“Hm. Why?” You raised an eyebrow at him.
“Uhm, I mean I fought bad guys all night?” He scoffed, a stupid question, he thought.
“Or was it because you practically killed someone tonight?” You bluntly said.
You had taken a step away from him, like he was a danger to you too.
“They were a criminal!” He shrugged.
“Why does that matter? You can’t just completely take someone’s life away. That’s not who you are. Before you say you didn’t, you came real close to.” You stood your position.
It felt like you shot him straight in the heart.
He should’ve listened to you. But instead, he took a shot right back at you, a shot to kill.
“Again, they’re criminals. I’m sorry I had to calm things down somehow. I’m sorry I needed to do something to catch a break for once in my damn life. And you’re not exactly helping that.” He looked away from you. He felt ashamed.
You were right, he knew that, even then. But his pride couldn’t let him admit it.
“What is wrong with you? You love Spider-Man. And you always talk about how killing sickens you. You’ve changed, Peter.” You spat back at him.
He should’ve just ended it there, stopped the excessive violence, stopped the fight. Maybe then he wouldn’t have been in your kitchen on that faithful Tuesday.
It had been two days since that argument.
His almost perfect rep was officially ruined (Jameson had a field trip that day, too). The stress was at an all-time high.
He almost couldn’t handle it. He didn’t want to anymore.
He was still so angry at you for being right. Because you always were.
You were the one who kept him balanced, who took care of him no matter the time of day or night.
He hadn’t been back to your apartment since the fight, either.
But he would return to it after a tough night the day after. And the next.
And you forgave him, so fast (He took you to see the Barbie movie, paid for every snack and drink you could’ve wanted. It was indisputable on your end). The guilt from what Peter’s put you through has just stacked on and on.
Now he really couldn’t handle it anymore. 
And so, there he was. Sat atop a random rooftop rethinking everything.
He debated his life. His three lives, more like. Which parts were worth it, and which weren’t. (It was really fucked up, who measures parts of their life in worth and just decides which to throw away?)
He couldn’t lose his job, how would he make money?
He couldn’t stop being Spider-Man, he knew that.
And there was you. The biggest and undoubtedly the most important part.
But you were also easy to throw away, he thought.
So much stress and time would be lifted off of his shoulders.
(Little did he know, it would be the complete opposite. His injuries didn’t heal all the way like they did when you took care of him. Every time he was hurt, it would linger for days at a time. He missed how much you’d worried for him. He really took you for granted.)
And so, he decided in the next couple of weeks, he would break it off.
And he did. On the Tuesday the following week.
He looks back on it — to this day — and realized everything he had said to you that evening, wasn’t directed at you. It was directed at himself.
Of course he enjoyed loving you. He didn’t enjoy being himself was what.
He needed to be his best for you because he couldn’t be with anything else. He failed at being the friendly and reliable Spider-man. Him and Doc didn’t get the grant they’d been needing for so long.
And when he did try to improve when you called him out that night, it just wasn’t enough.
He didn’t deserve you.
He took everything out on you, he didn’t mean a word he said. But you didn’t know that.
Peter never had an outlet to take anything out. He couldn’t leave you with every burden of his life, Doc and him weren’t that close, and May couldn’t know he was Spider-Man.
He snapped that Tuesday.
And there’s nothing more that he regrets in his entire life.
But he couldn’t burden you anymore. He wouldn��t.
He did nothing but keep you up late at night, hurt your feelings, and make you do everything for him.
Peter loved you. And he couldn’t let himself torture you like this.
So he forced himself to let you go. You would move on, anyways. He couldn’t.
He listened to every single one of the voicemails you sent.
Every. Single. One. He’s never heard you sound so down (Because of him, nonetheless).
It took so much out of him to not respond. More than what he had to give.
And after five weeks, he finally caved.
He texted you.
9:52 PM
Hey, beautiful.
You wouldn’t forgive him quick this time, he knew that. This time wasn’t just some fight. He tore your heart apart.
But he would work for your forgiveness, he swore to himself, God as his witness.
You read the message immediately. He knew you had gotten off of work, so it wasn’t completely abnormal.
But you didn’t respond. He checked his phone all night and the next morning (He was desperate for something, even if it was an angry text. He hated nothing more than you ignoring him).
So he texted you again. He just went straight for it this time, no holding back anymore.
1:16 PM
Can we meet up?? I think we can agree there’s still some loose ends we need to revisit, together.
Read 1:18 PM
He was patient this time. He tried stepping in your shoes, and it broke his heart. He couldn’t imagine you snapping on him like he had.
He couldn’t live if you were angry at him like he was at you. And if you weren’t going to respond again he was debating on just showing up to your apartment. Can’t ignore him that way.
2:12 PM
Y/N 💞 : “Loose ends” is a funny term. You mean when you randomly showed up to my apartment and broke up with me for the stupidest reason?
He cringed. This was a dumb decision.
2:12 PM
I know, trust me. I just want to talk. And explain myself.
Explain my biggest mistake. I’ve never regretted anything more than leaving you and taking the anger at myself onto you.
He debated on sending the message, but he didn’t.
You would just see it as him trying kiss your ass into forgiving him. It worked before.
2:14 PM
Y/N 💞 : Peter, why? Why are you only just know texting me? Why are you trying to meet up when you tore my heart into pieces? Why are you seeking forgiveness randomly?
Why are you asking such hard questions, he wanted to ask.
2:14 PM
Idk, I miss you?
I miss you and still love you. I regret that night so much.
Can you just hear me out? Please?
Nothing sounded right. But he just went for it, again. At this point, he was pacing across his rooftop, anxious for your response (If you even gave him one).
2:15 PM
Y/N 💞 : Peter, I swear. If you make me regret this, I’ll come for you. Worse than any enemy you’ve ever faced and ever will.
He laughed at that one. You wouldn’t —right?—
2:15 PM
I won’t, Y/N. I promise. Tomorrow, Micks at 3?
Read 2:16 PM
You left him on read, but he counted that as a success — you didn’t refuse his offer so.. —
He would come back from this. He has to.
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Peter was late. Fuck him.
Why did you even give him your time of day anymore? This man could tear you apart and you still gave into his words.
3:13 PM
Peter 🕸️ : Babt, I’mso sotry. I got caugjt up with worl, I’m bloxks away I sqaer.
You could barely understand him, but you were used to his usually proper grammar slipping while he was swinging.
How dare he? How dare he beg you to come out here and he gets to show up late??
He practically busted the restaurant’s door open. He rushed to your table.
“Baby I-”
“No,” You interrupted. “You don’t get to call me that. Fuck you, asshole. You ask me to meet you and you show up late? Are you kidding me?” You crossed your arms and stood up from the booth you were sitting at.
“Y/N, I’m so, so sorry. I got caught up with Doc at work. Huuge internal wiring problem. I don’t even understand how he could’ve messed it up so badly,” He talked with his hands, he was so cute when he did that.
You took a step towards him, and slapped the shit out of his stupidly attractive face.
“You don’t get to break me and show up late when you wanted me here.” The tears were back. You were livid. You shoved your finger into his face as you scolded him.
“I know, I know. I keep fucking up and I’m sorry. Lets just sit down and let me explain everything. I promise you, it’s worth it.” He put his hands on both of your shoulders to keep you from leaving and tried to calm you down.
“Hands off,” You pulled his hands away from your shoulder and slumped back into the booth.
You wanted to go home.
“Okay, okay.” He sat down and stared at you.
“Well?” You waited, “Let’s hear this explanation,” You rolled your eyes.
“Well, uh-” He paused for a moment, “I don’t know how to start.”
You waited for him to continue, arms still crossed. You really didn’t want to hear him out.
“Do you remember when I almost beat the life outta that guy? Like a month ago or something?” He asked.
“Yeah.” You rolled your eyes again, not exactly a good moment to bring up.
“I feel like that’s where it started,”
“Mhm..” You nodded for him to keep going.
“I started slipping. I stopped pulling my punches and I was so stressed out every moment of my life. A-and one day I just got so sick of it,” He started choking up, you almost felt bad for him.
“So I sat down and tried to organize my life. I wanted to rid myself of stress and try to free up time for myself in order to y’know, rejuvenate.”
You sat there, you were expecting plain excuses. But it seemed he had something real going here.
“I couldn’t rid myself of my job — how else would I be able to live? — and obviously Spider-Man isn’t a choice. And there came you. The best and biggest part of my life.”
You raised an eyebrow, waiting for him to continue.
“I was stupid, I thought that by taking a break, I’d feel more free. And feel more.. well less stressed out. If I had something to myself then I would be better and feel okay? I don’t know.”
You narrowed your eyes at him.
“Don’t look at me like that, please. I was so overwhelmed with everything. I’ve been so behind on rent, and crime just never stops around here. Its like it raises more and more every week.”
“I thought-” He took a deep breath, “I thought that if I had one less chore — trust me you are not a chore to me — life would get easier.”
You’re guessing he tried to rephrase his words he said before, he’s almost repeating himself.
“But it didn’t. At all. I was in pain all the time — emotionally and physically — it didn’t help at all. I said I didn’t enjoy loving you. I lied. I didn’t enjoy loving myself- or being me.”
Your heart clenched for him. He hurt you so bad, but hearing how he truly felt made you slightly reconsider things.
“I didn’t enjoy the stress of my life, and I don’t have any outlet for my anger. And you forgave me so easily the last time we fought. And I guess I took advantage of that. I took all of the hate I had for myself onto you. I think that will forever be my biggest mistake.”
Your eyebrows scrunched.
“I love you. So much, Y/N. More than words can describe. I’ve never regretted anything more in my life and I can’t ever be away from you, again.”
“I broke it off thinking it would cause me less stress, but I understand now that it was you who took the pressure away. Being away from you, Y/N,” He laughed (At his own pain, seemingly). “I’ve never felt shittier in my life.”
Your tears flowed. Your expectations were well exceeded. He’s fucked up so much, but he makes up for it every time. And this time, it wasn’t done by kissing your ass and spoiling you, you recognized that.
“I can’t explain how sorry I am. I regret what I did to you that night so much. More than anything in the world. I just hope you can understand that.”
“I hope you can understand me.” He kept eye contact, his eyes were watery. “I know how complicated I can get,” He let out a breathy laugh.
“Pete.” You just about whispered his name.
“Yeah..?” He wiped his eyes on his sleeve before answering you.
“I forgive you.” You smiled, still crying from his well thought out (you had to give him credit) apology.
“Wait- Really?”
“Yeah. I do.”
He stood up and hugged you from across the table.
“But..”
“But..?” He repeated you, curiously. He let go of the hug to look you in the eyes.
“You’re gonna have to pay for the meal if you really want me back.”
He laughed.
“I love you.”
He grabbed your cheeks and pulled you in for a kiss. He’s never kissed you so hard.
Stunned, but pleasantly surprised, you sat there for a moment. Unsure of whether you should kiss him or not.
But you grabbed his collar and melted into the kiss.
No matter how hard he had broken you, his words brought you back to him.
And you wouldn’t regret it, you knew that.
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part 2 is finished 🥹
just wanna explain a few things just in case:
peter is a lil ooc w the excessive violence and it’s not him to be like that but i feel like every body gets to that point where everything can be just too much. even spider-man.
i also feel like he needs a healthy outlet for his feelings, being spiderman, he’s constantly busy. not exactly easy to make friends. but also being spiderman, he doesn’t wanna leave y/n with all of his problems, he’s supposed to be the hero. so he bottles it all up. to the point where he just burst one day and took it out on her. (not good!!)
also i felt like him being a man, he’s going to feel insecure if y/n’s the one taking care of him all the time. he’s the man, it’s supposed to be the other way around, but it’s not. and that’s okay!! often times, old traditions still lies deep within all of us. men’s mental health matters too!! men can still feel insecure!! EVERYONE DOES. but that doesn’t mean we (as people) can take out our insecurities or anger at ourselves onto other people. most times, they don’t deserve the hate we bring onto ourselves.
that being said, not everyone can be perfect. (peter is a great example) we’re all going through something in life and are constantly being tested. but, the biggest thing is to always persevere no matter what. you’re never going to have more on your plate than you can handle. if you’re struggling, always remember to reach out to someone. a loved one, a professional, or even me. my dms are always open. i love you all. 🩷
anyways,
likes, reblogs, and comments are always appreciated!!
i hope you all enjoyed this story as much as i liked writing it 💗💗
288 notes · View notes
n0vabug · 9 months
Text
Insomnia
So the readers mom gets like sick and put into the hospital and the reader finds out, but doesn't tell sam because she didn't want sam to worry, so she snuck off everyday to the hospital to visit her, She developed depression and really bad anxiety and insomnia and sam finds out. Sorry if it's not good, I forgot about this and then came back to it and rushed the end so yeah 👍.
This contains: mentions of depression, anxiety, insomnia, angst, a little fluff (I would've wrote more but I needed to post smth 😭😭), and other stuff like this. If this or anything else makes you uncomfortable, I recommend that you do NOT read this. Words: 1757
THIRD PERSON POV
Sam, Y/n, Mindy, Chad, and Tara, have all moved to NY six months ago after the ghostface attacks. Y/n's mom lived in New York and Y/n was always close with her mom, her mom made her feel loved and always put her first, when Y/n first told her mom about dating sam, her mom was very supportive and loved sam like she loved Y/n. When Y/n told her mom that they were moving to NY, her mom was very happy. Her mom lived in Brooklyn while Y/n and Sam lived in the city so they lived about 30 minutes away from each other. After 2 months of living in NY, Y/n's mom got really sick and put into the hospital, she eventually fell into a coma. Y/n's dad left her and her mom when she was 2 so they had no contact with him, so Y/n was the only person the hospital called when she got put there, since they had no other family, her mom's parents died and her sister lived in another country and has no contact with them. Y/n snuck off to the hospital every day to visit her mom, she hasn't slept in 4 months and hasn't been the same. Anika quickly became best friends with Y/n, so when she wasn't with Mindy, she was with Y/n. Sam and Anika have noticed but Y/n just lies and says she is fine.
Y/N'S POV
It was 1pm, which was the usual time that I went to visit my mother in the hospital, I told sam that I had to go to my job, praying she wouldn't find any of this out. The insomnia, the depression, the anxiety, the pills, everything else, all of it, if she found out, she would be pissed that I've been lying to her.
"Bye sam, I have to go to work."
"Yep, I know, bye." She came over to me and tried to hug me before I left, but I flinched when she put her arms out, causing her to not hug me.
"You okay?"
"Yeah, I'm great, love you, bye."
"Love you too..." was the last thing I heard before walking out the door and to my car.
SAM'S POV
Y/n has been acting really weird lately, she usually loves physical touch but she flinches every time I try to hug her, she hates only saying "love you" because she says "it has less meaning if you don't put the I in front of it" but she hasn't said "I love you" in who knows how long, she stares off into space all the time, and her eyes, they look exhausted. She goes to her job everyday at 12:30 pm, she doesn't tell me where she works and she shows up very late every night. Anika was the only one to seem who noticed. Anika was thankfully at our dorm so I could tell her what happened this time, Chad, Ethan, Tara, Anika, and Quinn all had a small hangout. I walked up to Anika to pull her aside for a second.
"Hey can I talk to you for a second?" I asked
"Yeah, is everything okay?"
"Yeah, it's just something important I have to talk to you about." I said before walking into my room with her following behind.
"She's being weird again." I told her
"What happened this time?" She asked me, we always told each other if she was acting weird, we asked her if she was okay, but she always said yes, we both doubted it though.
"She said 'love you' again and flinched when I tried to hu g her."
"Ask her about it Sam, and this time don't just ask if she's okay, because she obviously isn't, tell her that she can trust you, and she can tell you anything, but if she doesn't say anything just give her time, she'll open up about it soon."
"I can try, if I see her tonight, thanks Anika, you can go back to Mindy now."
One secret I knew about Y/n was that even though she was 25, she still kept a notebook that she wrote in like a diary, like a 13 year old. I knew I shouldn't have, but I wanted to figure out what was going on, so I looked in the place she hid it, and grabbed it, I opened it and started reading.
June 2022
One of my mom's friends went over to her house today, they found her passed out on the floor, she called an ambulance and they took her in, she was put in a coma, I don't know how to feel, but I told sam I got a job, and left today to visit her at the hospital, she was cold, lifeless, seeing her like this hurt me, I couldn't tell sam, I didn't want her to worry about me, plus it'll ll probably be fine soon.
September 2022
It's been 3 months, she's not awake, I've had little to no sleep during this time, I developed depression and worse anxiety problems, I sneak to the hospital everyday at 1pm still claiming I'm going to work. I think Sam and Anika have started to notice, they ask me a lot if I'm okay. Every time Sam touches me, I think of my mom when I was little, I know it's a weird comparison but idk it's just how I feel, I miss it, but I just don't want a reminder of what's been going on.
October 2022 I've suffered from insomnia for 4 months now, all because in my restless dreams, I see her face, her pale lifeless body, laying there. It's all getting worse, I still haven't told sam, I don't want her to worry.
Y/N'S POV
I walked into the room my mom was in, again, like I have for the last four months. I'm staring at her cold lifeless body, every time I see her my heart just shatters, seeing her like this everyday, asking myself if it will ever just get better.
Before all of this happened, I loved physical touch, when sam's warm soft hands would intertwine with my fingers, or wrap around my waist. I loved it. I miss it, but every time she touches me, I think of my mom. When sam puts her hands on my shoulders it makes me think of a game me and my mom played where I would hide and when she found me she would be secretive and put her hands on my shoulders to scare me. When sam hugs me I think of how I would run into my mom's arms everyday she picked me up from school. When sam kisses me on the forehead or cheek, I think of my mom kissing my forehead or cheek when saying goodnight. It is a weird comparison but of course my mom did it out of love, but family type of love, while sam does it out of romantic love, but her touch just reminds me of my mom when I was a kid. I understand it sounds weird, but idk.
~~~
I get back to the apartment, thinking it would be a normal day, but the second I saw sam, I was interrogated with many questions. 
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Is she okay?"
"Are you okay, well I know the answer to that, but you should've told me, I worry more now that you didn't tell me about this."
I looked at her confused, why would she know any of this, I couldn't think why she would know, until she held up the diary, I know I'm 25 and it's stupid but it's a nice way to get my feelings out.
"I uh, I don't know, I'm sorry, I should've told you sooner." Tears brimmed at my eyelids, I tried to hold them back but I couldn't, I stared at sam for a moment until the warm tears trickled down my cheeks and wouldn't stop. She gave me a concerning look, but didn't hug me because she knew about the touch thing. I walked up to her, wrapped my arms around her, and tightly gripped onto her shirt. She wrapped her arms around me and rubbed my back, she put her other hand on my head until she picked me up, my legs wrapped around her waist and face buried in the crook of her neck.
We sat there for a few minutes until I calmed down.
"Listen, you know you can tell me anything right? It hurts me to see you in this state, I can see you have barely slept, I've noticed the anxiety and everything else. You can talk to me whenever, if you want to talk to me about this, I'm willing to listen whenever you're ready and whenever you want to talk. I love you." Is what she said before kissing my forehead.
"Thank you, I'm sorry that I didn't tell you before, I just couldn't, but you know now so I'll tell you more about it later, I'm still not exactly ready. I love you sam."
She looked at me and smiled, she then passionately kissed me, and ofc not being able to resist, I kissed her back. I love her.
A/N Sorry about the end, I kind of forgot about this and needed to quickly finish it 😭😭😭, anyways it's almost summer and i'm really excited, except for the fact that I have to leave my friends which makes me very sad, I wished for it to be summer and now it almost is and I regret it because I might not see some of my best friends ever again ☹️☹️. Anyways I hope you liked this chapter.
UPDATE: WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK WAS GOING ON THROUGH MY HEAD WHEN I WROTE THIS, IM NGL I HATE IT, BUT IT HAD THE SECOND HIGHEST AMOUNT OF VOTES ON WATTPAD 😭😭. ALSO FUCK THE AUTHORS NOTE, ITS ALMOST SCHOOL, AND IM NOT FUCKING EXCITED, IT WAS ONLY ONE FRIEND I WAS LEAVING BRO, AND I STILL TALK TO HER, BUT WTF WAS GOING THROUGH MY MIND WHILE WRITING THIS, I MEAN ITS WHATEVER IG. BTW THIS AND SICK WERE ALSO FROM MAY.
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oneforthemunny · 28 days
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okay SO. i know i don't even go here, i'm a janitor!eddie girlie BUT i feel very strongly about hockey!eddie because he's insane but also so dumb and i love dumbasses. anyways. i was reading what you said about him being grossed out by his teammates when they cheat and i had this idea so i wanna share it with you
imagine, if you will, that reader becomes really good friends with another hockey wife. young couple, maybe they recently had a baby and reader is obsessed, eddie is obsessed because omg my girl with a baby why is this awakening something in me, it's all very cute. double dates type of shit, maybe this is the first time reader has felt included in the wives and girlfriends club! and then eddie's teammate cheats on his wife and reader finds out. she's DEVASTATED because that's her friend!!!! that's her adopted nephew/niece!!! why would that asshole do that??? so ofc she goes and tells eddie and eddie is LIVID. next day at the locker room eddie breaks his nose or something lmao
god this is so sick and so good because i feel it. like i can see it so vividly.
she finally gets into the group, feels apart of it, and is enjoying herself. plus, she's with this other wife, who seemingly has made it work ya know? husband still plays and she's with him, but also has a balance to her life and schedule, and a baby??? it's like everything reader has wanted, and she's seeing someone have it, and it gives her hope. like all these fears, they're silly bc this can work!
eddie's close with the teammate, but not the most close, bc they're on opposite sides (defense and offense) so they don't really practice and play as much. but still, he likes him, thinks he's a cool guy.
they all get super close, especially during off season, and hang out all the time. guys got a wife, a career, a baby? he's older, been traded before and kinda takes eddie under his wing. truly, they're very very fast friends.
then they go out one night. maybe they had a press thing to do, or a team meeting, decide to go for a beer after it.
eddie's thinking nothing of it, they're sitting at some bar or club or whatever, and next thing he knows, there's two girls?? the guy had called them?? he kisses the one girl in greeting and eddie is immediately sick to his stomach. floored, shocked, disgusted, hurt- all of the above.
he leaves, right there. no warning, nothing, just leaves. is visibly shaken when he tells you later, rambling, eyes wide, just perplexed.
i feel like he wouldn't jump right into beating him. you both talk and are like "no way, there's no way, right?" maybe they're in an open relationship? maybe they swing? maybe they're freaky like that?
so eddie tries to talk to him the next day about it. "i know you'd never do that, man. i'm sorry. i just, i kinda freaked."
but his teammate doesn't reassure him. doesn't tell him that his wife knows. he kinda gets quiet. "i mean, no, she doesn't know, but she really doesn't need to. now does she?" he kinda shrugs. "i mean, we just had a baby, and ya know, she's so tired all the time. it'd be shitty of me to ask her."
eddie is, once again, sick. jaw dropped, he can't even speak, he's so fucking sick. "plus the road gets lonely. you know what i mean." the teammate continues. "look, i love my wife. i don't think there's anything wrong with getting a little something every now and then. it's purely physical. i wear a rubber, get what i need, and come home and keep them happy. i mean, what's the point of causing issues in my own marriage, when i could do this? take care of it."
"you don't think fucking around on your wife is causing issues in your own marriage?" eddie sneers.
"no." he scoffs. "not unless she finds out. what she doesn't know won't hurt her, right?" he shakes his head, shrugs it off nonchalantly. "look, kid, i get it. you're in love right now with your girl. it's all about her and nothings better, and that's great. for now. then you'll want a little more, and, hey, there's nothing wrong with that. it's biologically encoded in our dna as mammals to need more than one mate. monogamy, it's barbaric. and you'll understand. one day... you know, shit won't look the same, feel the same, and you'll-"
that's when eddie breaks his teeth. knocks him clear out, his coaches and team mates running to break it up, confused why there's a fight on the sidelines? no regrets from eddie. he got fined, had to run suicides until he threw up, but it was worth it. knocking that piece of shit out, totally worth it.
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pahtoosh · 1 year
Text
doctor daddy
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[image ID: a behind the scenes photo of Sebastian Stan as Lee Bodecker from The Devil All The Time. He is standing with his hands in his pockets and looking off into the distance. /.end ID]
masterlist
18+
wc: ~980 words
warnings: Lee wants to beat someone up(no one in particular, he’s just frustrated), reader is in physical pain, mentions of painkillers, written on my phone, sappy and needy reader as usual. Lee carries reader.
a/n: this picture makes me giggle, I wonder what he’s thinking about.
pairing: lee bodecker x gn!little!reader
summary: Lee’s baby is hurting
⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆ ⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆ ⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆
Pain and suffering: that’s all you knew. The sun never seemed so dull and the nights never seemed so cold. You wondered if you’d survive the ne-
“Baby?”
Oh! Daddy’s home!
Lee quickly toed off his shoes and met you at the couch, setting down his paper grocery bag along the way. You looked adorable swaddled up in a blanket with your stuffed bunny, but Lee’s heart couldn’t help but ache for you.
You’d been stuck on the couch all day. Standing or even sitting up required too much energy, not to mention that shifting positions could mean upsetting your body further.
Earlier today Lee wanted to call in sick and tend to you, but you assured him that you would be okay as he went on with his shift at the station. He lovingly carried you to the couch where he’d set up everything you could’ve possibly needed while he was gone. Blankets, painkillers, snacks, water, books, and the TV remote were all within reach. Your daddy left you with a kiss on the forehead and strict instructions to rest up, drink water, eat a snack, and call him if you needed help.
You obliged with a yes, daddy and made it through the next seven hours still in pain, bored, and missing your daddy. You were so happy when he came home, but your state meant you had to wait for him to come to you instead of running to meet him at the door as usual. Luckily, Lee wasted no time getting to your side. He’d missed you just as much as you’d missed him.
He held your smaller hand in his and gave you three gentle kisses on your forehead, the tip of your nose, and your puffed out lip. Lee normally loved your pouty face but knowing that this one was caused by your state of pain rather than an adorable neediness made it less enjoyable. He almost wished there was a single person responsible for your pain so he could take it out on them, but he knew all he could do now was be here for you.
“How ya feelin’ sweetie?”
“Hurts, Daddy.”
Lee muttered a curse under his breath and gently massaged the hand he was holding. “My poor baby. ‘ wish there was somethin’ I could do to help. I could beat up someone right now, makes me so mad seein’ my baby hurt like this.”
You shook your head and pulled his hand closer. “Just need Daddy.”
Lee smiled for the first time that day. “And you’ll get him, sweetheart. Just let me help ya out a little first, yeah? I stopped by the store and got somethin’.”
You raised your eyebrows in curiosity. Lee normally just bought the essentials, and you technically had everything you could need to recover at home already. He tucked your arm back under the blanket and began pulling stuff out of the bag.
“I gotcha a different kinda pain medicine, this one’s a cream. There’s a new thermometer, in case the old one wasn’ workin’ right and my baby really is sick. This here’s a new pair of socks to keep yer feet warm and protected. And this is a lollipop for being my good ‘n brave little baby.”
You admired your new socks and treat with a soft thank you daddy and let Lee fuss over you with his new supplies. He cleaned the new thermometer and let out a sigh of relief when it confirmed that you were at a safe temperature. He swapped out your old, worn-out socks with the new, softer ones. And then he carefully peeled back the blanket and your clothing to rub in the pain-relief cream.
After Lee washed his hands, he climbed in behind you on the couch, replacing the numerous pillows and blankets with his solid body. His round belly fit perfectly into the curve of your back, and his strong arms acted like a weighted blanket. He knew just how to support you to keep you comfortable and ease your pain.
In this position, he could also speak to you in a hushed tone and feel butterflies in his chest whenever you whispered back or snuggled closer to him.
You asked him about his day. He kept it brief, mostly talking about how much he missed you. He only shared the details of his work with you when you were at your big age; Lee was very diligent about preserving the safety of your little mind.
He turned the question on you, listening to you describe the episodes of Bugs Bunny you watched and what antics your stuffies got into today. He loved hearing about your inner world. Lee never got to explore his imagination too much. His responsibilities kept him tied to the real world, so he admired that you were able to keep that part of you alive while still dealing with your own issues.
The two of you fell into a comfortable silence before you were overcome with the need to tell your daddy how much you appreciate him.
“Thank you for takin’ care of me, Daddy.”
Lee kissed the back of your head. “It’s no problem, sweetheart. That’s what daddies are for. You feelin’ any better? That pain medicine doin’ its job yet?”
“Mhm.” You nodded and then turned your head to muffle your next sentence, shy about the sappy words about to leave your mouth. “Daddy’s the best medicine though.”
Lee chuckled and pulled you closer if that was possible. “Oh yeah? What makes ya say that?”
You squeezed his arms wrapped around you and wiggled against his belly, proving your point. “Daddy’s soft and cozy and strong. And Daddy gives the best cuddles.”
Lee shook his head, not believing how lucky he was to have you in his life. “Daddy loves you, baby. And I’ll never stop cuddling you.”
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xypherz · 1 year
Text
Six Rooms
Details: Cole Cassidy x Reader, GN!Reader, fluff, 1.2k words
Warnings: A single curse word, mention of anxiety and reader insecurity, not proofread.
Being a recalled Overwatch hero isn’t easy. Omnic crises and vigilantes are enough to burn anyone out. Though you’re trained to handle situations like these, you need an escape. Some respite to ease your constant stress. 
This is not what you had in mind. 
You planned for a night in. A night all to yourself with no distractions. Sure, there are the other heroes around, but no mission, no omnics, no expectations, is all you wanted.
You planned to have your own room. Your own bed.
You did not account for someone being shoved into what you thought was your escape.
In the bathroom when it happened, you were just setting up essentials like your toothbrush and soaps, when you heard the door to your room being opened, followed by a deep grunt, and a small British voice.
“6 rooms, 7 of us, sorry!!”
The door slammed shut before you could even process what little information you were given. 
Contemplating if you wanted to sleep in the bathtub to preserve your mental solitude, you decided to check who invaded your space, voluntarily or otherwise. The hinges of the bathroom door made an uncomfortable squealing noise as you opened it to the rest of the room.
This is a sick joke.
Not only were you met with the man who had tripped your hopeless romantic heart down the stairs, but he was dressed down.
Cole Cassidy in a t-shirt and jeans? This was simultaneously the best and worst day of your life.
“Hey there, sorry to intrude, I wasn’t given much of a choice in the matter. You’d think I have some advantage on Tracer, but damn, she is stronger than she looks.”
You nodded, voice getting caught in your throat. You’d talked to Cassidy plenty of times, hell, you consider him a friend, but this is too different. You’d never really spoken with him outside of work in private. It’s always on a mission or with others.
“I can sleep in Reinhardt’s room if you’re not comfortable,” he said, voice seeming gentle when not muffled by commands and gunshots.
“No,” you replied, a bit too fast for your liking, “I’m okay with you staying in here, I just wasn’t expecting visitors.”
“Sorry for that, I wasn’t told about the room situation until a few minutes ago. I offered to stay in Reinhardt’s room in the first place, but Tracer insisted.”
“Not your fault, don’t worry about it,” you said sheepishly, eyes trailing to the elephant in the room. Cassidy’s eyes follow yours to the bed. Singular. 
“I’ll sleep on the floor, don’t worry your pretty head over it,” he said, offering a small smile while making his way to the open spot in front of the bed with his bag.
“No, I can’t let you do that, there’s no way that’ll be comfortable.”
“I’d rather the discomfort over yours.”
“I’ll be fine, really,” you said. Though you were aware of Cassidy’s chivalry, you didn’t want him to be in physical pain for your sake.
“I’m not letting you sleep on the floor.”
“Well…” you trailed off, knowing the two of you were too stubborn to let the other be uncomfortable, “We can just share.”
His expression morphed into that of surprise, “I wouldn’t want to intrude more-”
“Cassidy,” you cut him off mid-sentence, “It’s okay, really.”
He resisted the urge to ask for reassurance again, “Okay, then. But if you need me to leave at any point, you can push me onto the floor,” he joked, lightening the awkward tension.
“You got it,” you smiled and walked to your bag, grabbing a set of pajamas and walking to the bathroom. Suddenly the weight of what you had proposed settled in when you looked in the mirror. You were going to sleep in the same bed with someone. Cole Cassidy, no less. The man you’ve been silently, or maybe not so silently to the other heroes, pining over for however long you’ve known him.
Maybe you did want to sleep in the bathtub.
You finished changing, brushing your teeth, and silently calming your anxieties and left the bathroom to see Cassidy was already changed. Any thought of how good he looked in jeans was replaced by how good he looked in boxers. He passed you as he walked to the bathroom while you approached the queen bed in the center of the room. Sitting under the covers, you decided to distract yourself until you were tired enough to sleep.
It was hard to distract yourself when Cassidy joined you in the surprisingly small bed. Maybe it was just the difference between it and his stature that made it seem small. Maybe it was your anxiety closing in on you.
“You sure you’re okay with this?” Your thoughts were interrupted by Cassidy’s concerned question. 
“You’d be pushed on the floor by now if I weren’t,” you joked, though truthfully, it wasn’t far off. Had it been anyone else, you’d have been completely okay with them sleeping on the floor while you enjoyed your personal space. But it wasn’t anyone else.
He smiled a bit at your statement, though it seemed unsure. He leaned over to the bedside table and turned off the lamp.
“Goodnight Y/N.”
You were still sitting up in the bed, staring into nothing as he laid down, his back turned to you.
“Hey, Cassidy?” Your voice came out before you could stop it.
He turned a bit to look at you, “Yeah? You okay?”
“Yeah, I just…” you trailed off, “Sorry, I’m just thinking too much.”
“What’s on your mind?” He sat up fully, staring into the darkness with you.
“Why are you so nice to me?” Though you couldn’t see it, you felt his eyes turn to you. The anxieties you’d been staving off seemed to catch up to you. “I mean, I guess you’re nice to everyone, but… I don’t think I deserve it.” 
“I think if anyone deserves it, it’s you.”
You turned your head toward him, knowing his eyes were on you as well, but the space was too dark to see.
“Why?” The question held a lot of weight. Why had he asked you so many times if this situation was okay? Why had he refused to let you be uncomfortable? Why was he willing to sacrifice his own comfortability just for yours? Why did he always stay by your side during missions? Why did he help you through broken limbs and bullet holes? He didn’t need to do any of it.
So why?
He didn’t respond for what felt like too long.
“You think too much,” he said softly, lightly grabbing your jaw and pulling you closer to him. 
He waited. He waited for you to pull back. He waited for any signal that what he was doing wasn’t okay. Instead, you leaned forward, placing your hand at the back of his neck before pressing your lips against his. The kiss was sweet. It was slow with no expectations.
You pulled back a bit, the darkness making it easier to find your voice, “I definitely think too much.”
----
Your bag seemed way too heavy so early in the morning. 
You walked out the door ahead of Cassidy, turning the corner to head to the lobby. Reinhardt and Tracer were in front of you, halfway there already. A door opening made you turn your head, Mercy and Genji walking out of a room. 
“Didn’t we have 6 rooms?” you thought, when the realization dawned on you, “Well played, Tracer.”
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sirfrogsworth · 14 days
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Clark Bridge in Alton, Illinois
These were not the photos I intended to take.
They were not the photos I had in my head.
A new friend had offered to help me with various things and one of those things was my photography field trips. We had been planning this for over a week and the day finally came. I was feeling okay, but not 100%. It was nearing sunset and I was getting all of my gear together. Then I decided I needed to find my ND filters (sunglasses for a camera). Which were downstairs in storage. And, stupidly, I spent 20 minutes digging through things to find them. And by the time I found them, I noticed I was out of breath. Usually when I lose my breath that quickly it is a bad sign. My body is telling me I'm probably not up to anything physical at that moment.
But, I really wanted to take some new pictures. My mental health has not been doing great and I just needed some photography therapy. So we headed to the location. When we reached our destination there was an uphill path to where we needed to go.
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It was a warm 85° and I was still not recovered from my scavenger hunt despite the car ride. But I had to get my photo, so I didn't listen to my body. As we walked up the hill I just kept going slower and slower. It was getting harder and harder to breathe. And when I finally got to the top my body had almost no energy left to power itself. And when that happens and all of your vital body functions still demand energy, you can feel quite sick. I tried so hard to tough it out. I took a few test photos. And then I realized I had to either lay down or collapse.
This was my first time meeting this new friend in person. And she was very understanding and helpful. But it was still embarrassing having to lie down on some grass next to a public bike path. There was a moment when I was convinced I was going to need to call EMTs to carry me off that hill.
But I just gave my body a moment and let the bugs eat me as I rested in the sharp grass. And I slowly started to regenerate some energy and felt much less sick. But I could not take another photo. The test shots were all I was going to get. And we had to call it a night and get me back home.
Thankfully walking down a hill is much easier than walking up it. But as I walked down I could see the sun kissing the horizon. I could see the photograph I wanted to take. I was able to get something sort of like I wanted with my smartphone as we walked down the hill (the top photo) but the wide angle lens made the bridge look tiny and I was just frustrated it wasn't what was in my head.
I got home and passed out. I woke up in the middle of the night feeling pretty drained from the experience. But my body seemed to be back to a stable state. I finally looked at the few photos I managed to capture and they actually surprised me. The smartphone snap was way better than I was expecting and with some fancy editing it looked pretty close to the quality of my big camera. And I got that cool boat without even realizing it.
So it seems I can take decent photos by accident during a health crisis.
New talent unlocked.
The actual goal of the evening was to get to know my new friend. And that was 100% accomplished despite my embarrassment. She was very kind and reassured me everything was fine and there was nothing to be embarrassed about. I appreciated that empathy and that's a pretty admirable quality to have in a new friend.
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the-s1lly-corner · 5 months
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Heyy me again so about the creepypasta thing, I just wondered if you can do Ben drowned with a gen z reader platonically? It's okay if your uncomfortable doing it ><
Ben drowned x gen z!reader (platonic!)
not uncomfortable at all! love that im getting ben drowned requests since i enjoy him a lot and kind of want to write for him more; just strictly platonic ..which reminds me, i need to draw him again soon! gonna answer this then take a break and get back to requests yipe!
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admin is still sold on the idea of ben being confined to electronics most of the time so i can easily see him gaining access to your devices so he can pester you whenever he wants; though this may get a little annoying since youre... well still alive! you have a life
whether or not the reader is a creepypasta themselves or is a normal person is up to you! i think both can work, though i must say the idea of the reader being just some random person is really funny. like can you imagine? you get some haunted virus but the ghost is chill an you guys become friends
i do think ben can only mess with devices, i dont think he can mess with like. any internet browser stuff.... which segways me to my next idea; the og creepypasta came out in 2010, majoras mask came out in 2000, so putting it in the middle lets say ben died in 2005.. bro has missed a lot. youre going to have to fill him in on a lot of stuff, and boy let me tell you hes going to be going nuts
tell him about the new legend of zelda games. i think he would be hyped. throwing admins hc of ben being sick and tired of LOZ due to being trapped in the game out the window, admin needs this boy to get joyous!
he probably pesters you and asks you about the dumbest shit, does it on purpose because he thinks its funny
sometimes you guys play video games together, bro is absolutely astounded by how far games have come since he passed away. i think he would go insane over five nights at freddys. fill him in on the lore
going back on the video game stuff and playing together, just know that hes going to break the game and cheat + hes a sore loser, soooooooo...
do you think sometimes he comes and tries to spend time with you more and more over time because hes been stuck for years and hasnt really had many people to talk to? like yeah hes an angry spirit, but even angry spirits deserve friends!!!
ponders
probably messes with you by messing with your recordings if youre trying to make a video/tiktok/reel/what have you
probably interjects his own texts into your posts, never really says anything harmful, just messes with spelling or adds dumb messages
honestly its not your SM account/blog, its yalls shared account/blog now/j
stuck with old 2000s humor but i think he would absolutely love present day humor and how unhinged its gotten, though quick warning hes going to start quoting stuff
definitely quotes the sticking out your gyatt thing, hes going to drive you insane with it and hes going to laugh at you
do not play roblox tycoons with him hes going to bully small children
you guys play a horror game together on roblox and you can hear him freaking out through the speakers (likely using an old device for him so youre not fighting for control over one device)
absolutely DEVASTED when you tell him club penguin shut down
just know hes punching the metaphorical wall
on the rare chance ben is able to pull himself into the real world for a brief period of time, you guys probably do the same stuff hes just physically there for a short time!
make him touch grass while hes out, bro hasnt touched grass in nearly 20 years. this isnt even a haha "hes chronically online" joke, he hasnt actually touched grass in years due to circumstances
closing this with a hit of angst that made me go :( but imagine that it starts out as you guys being around the same age (well... close enough, since ben doesnt age anymore due to being a ghost) but overtime, you obviously grow up and have less and less time for him and :(
like owie
"what happened to us? we used to be best friends?" audio but its you two SOBS AND CRIES
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