#baby el

[anexperimentallife]

Interracial US family w/ disabled autistic dad and toddler needs to get to the US for medical treatment

(New post because the old one was getting LONG with the updates. Details are under the "read more" to save your dash, with updates in the notes.)

TL;DR: If I'm going to live long enough to watch our daughter grow up, we need to get back to the US and get set up in a disability-friendly place where I can use my medical benefits.

Although I was already disabled (autism, adhd, and spine, joint, and head injuries), my health was stable--until four bouts of COVID left me immunocompromised, and utterly destroyed my health (including damage to my heart, blood clots that damaged one eye, neurological and joint issues, etc.), and although we started off fine, we've been hammered with one crisis after another, both medical and financial, that no one could have predicted.

Until we have enough to get back to the US, a chunk of whatever comes in has to go towards medical care that can't be put off, so the sooner we can reach critical mass on that, the better.

If you can help, or reblog, or share the links on other platforms, we'd be grateful!

The "Donate to Little or None" Paypal donation link takes the lowest fees, I think. (Kept the same link from when we were fighting to get our daughter's birth certificate fixed so we could get her citizenship affirmed.)

Then there's Ko-Fi:

And my little sister started a GoFundMe for us!

EDIT: The donation links above still work, but I removed the GoFundMe link.

IF YOU WANT ALL THE DETAILS SEE THE "READ MORE."

(There's more in my "rob gets medical" tag if you want a blow by blow account of how we got to this point over the past few years, but this is the gist.)

HOW IT STARTED:

I moved to the Philippines six years ago, after the deaths of my adult sons, in part to make my disability payments stretch further. Shortly afterwards, I was joined by my now-wife @thesurestthing (also from the US) for what was supposed to be a visit, but which turned into a permanent arrangement.

After I got a contract to license an old story for a mobile game (which tripled our income*), we found out we were having a baby, which was fine, because despite my disabilities (autism, adhd, two spine injuries, traumatic brain injury, a herniated esophagus, joint issues, etc.), my health was stable, and thanks to the contract, we were fine financially as well.

HOW IT STARTED GOING DOWNHILL:

Zoey's pregnancy was complicated, requiring two hospitalizations, and our daughter's birth was complicated, too--requiring a C-Section--which tripled our hospital bill. A few weeks after our daughter was born, the aforementioned contract was canceled without warning. THEN, when we tried to register our daughter's birth with the US embassy, we discovered an error on her birth certificate that left her stateless, and which took nearly two years, all our savings, and a fundraiser (thank you, generous people!) to resolve. Combined with medical expenses, that left us in a lot of debt.

A brief summary of went else wrong (leaving a lot out for brevity's sake):

I got COVID three four times during all this, became immunocompromised, and developed a slew of other medical issues (heart damage, eye damage and temporary facial paralysis from blood clots, persistent infections, a worsening of my joint issues, neurological issues, etc.) as a result of Long Covid.

I've had to be hospitalized a couple of times, undergo surgery, and was on an oxygen machine twice--once for an entire month, while I was bedridden. As of 24 January, 2024, I'm still recovering from my fourth bout of covid, which started at the beginning of October 2023.

There's a lot more, but you get the idea. COVID has completely wrecked my health, including tearing up my immune system.

And yes, I'm as fully vaxxed against COVID as one can be in the Philippines, with all available boosters, but again--I'm immunocompromised, plus they don't have the vax for the newest variant here yet. Zoey is vaxxed, also, and as a result, her bout with covid was extremely mild. El isn't vaxxed yet because they won't give the covid vaccine to kids under five here, but she's been able to share Zoey's antibodies from breast-feeding--which is apparently a thing.

The only way we can see for me to stay alive long enough to watch Eleanor grow up is to get back to where I can use my Medicare and VA benefits**.

WHY SO MUCH MONEY?

First, while we're still here, we need to pay for whatever medical care can't be put off. Plus, since I'm now immunocompromised, we have to get LOTS of vaccinations before we have to spend 24 hours or so in crowded planes and airports.

Second, we're going to be arriving with only what we can carry with us on the plane, and we'll need to get into a place near a VA hospital that I can easily get around in while I'm recovering from surgeries and getting various treatments. We'll need to pick up some secondhand household goods, and some kind of used transportation (because, you know, it's the US, where you kind of need a vehicle to get around).

We'll also need enough on top of my and El's disability payments to get by for a couple of months while Zoey looks for work. And all this is while we're still paying off the debt from the stuff I mentioned above.

So we're figuring that unless we catch some very lucky breaks, it'll probably cost between 20K and 36K altogether.

(We can't simply stay with friends when we get back, because literally every single close friend we have in the US with extra room and who lives close to a VA hospital has cats--to which I have a severe anaphylactic reaction. As in my entire respiratory system shuts down, and I have to be rushed to the ER to keep from dying; this has happened more than once. The only way I can be around cats is if I'm on immunosuppressants, and my immune system is ALREADY compromised, so I CAN'T do that.)

So again, if you can kick in, or reblog, or post our crowdfunding links (or the link to this post) on whatever other platforms you use, we'd appreciate it.

(*When I told social security about it, they said I could keep getting disability, too, because licensing IP rights didn't count as work income, and since it was a Moldavian company, it also fell under a special tax clause for getting paid by a foreign company while living overseas, so no taxes on it, either. )

(**VA benefits--I was a cold warrior in 1980s Germany. It was less than forty years after WWII, there was a lot of sabre-rattling--some of it nuclear--and we were there as a deterrent to prevent in Germany the kind of thing that's happening in Ukraine right now. Disclaimer because I'm tired of people accusing me of "invading" folks in the early 1980s when I was a dumb, heavily propagandized pre-Internet kid fixing generators in Europe. I wouldn't join today even if I could.)

#rob gets medical #mutual aid #medical fundraiser #long covid #repatriation #my face #baby el #zoey

[thesurestthing]

The other day my toddler was saying "no" over and over for no apparent reason, so i asked her what she was talking about, and she said, "I'm talkin' about no!!!"

#words from bug #rob #babyposting #pie #baby el

[ankayim]

#couple #lostonyoubabe #bugeceicelim #rumll #busonolsun #visnelimeybuzz #elden ele #love #bokmutluyuzaqq #baby #kaanbubelli #kakaollusut #fypシ #sarhoskedi #cottagecore #easthetic #cirkinkadininutopyasi #ahpiraye #asosyalbeyfendi #ankayim

[imthursdaysyme]

El Hopper

#stranger things #drawing #art #digital art #eleven hopper #eleven stranger things #el hopper #el hopper byers #i just think about how little she was often #how tiny #she was literally a baby #there was no reason #which is why I never take any criticism or hate on her character #I just want to bundle her up and hold her tight #pretty much I relate the most to Joyce byers

[tiger-in-the-flightdeck]

Kon’s Prize-Winning Cock

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Bonus:

#conner kent #kon el #young just us #superboy #dc social media au #bart allen #tim drake #cissie king jones #cassie sandsmark #owen mercer #ray terrill #red tornado #yes i decided that baby boomer is a member of yj for this au #because it's funny to me

[dailydccomics]

Clark speaking the truth One-Star Squadron #3 art by Steve Lieber

#clark kent #dc comics #superman #kal el #dc #one star squadron #one-star squadron #kal-el #comics #preach baby

[hothammies]

concept designs for the zombie apocalypse au i'm working on - pt. 1 (small au details under the cut regarding their designs)

--- mike's design

always wears his bomber jacket (normally decorated with pins) - was given to him by nancy when he was ten and he grew into it

signature weapon is a machete - likes its versatility + has terrible aim with guns: the only one he can kind of use is a shotgun, but he rarely uses it because the kickback fucks with his shoulder

will's design

always wears a long sleeve around his waist "just in case" (normally his military jacket or a flannel)

watch was given to him by jonathan when he was ten

signature weapon is a hunting rifle - is the second best with guns after lucas + follows the st canon of him using a rifle in s1e1

el's design

wardrobe always consists of one thing from a different party member (ex. gray hoodie is actually mike's, next day she wears a lucas jacket or a will flannel, etc.) it makes her feel safe :'D

doesn't have a signature weapon + is very versatile - just tends to use whatever's on hand at times or the environment around her

---

other notes: i fucking love apocalypse shit :P i'm still working on the whole outline of course, but if you're wondering, the infection i'm imagining would be a mix between days gone + l4d + a smidgen of tlou while the world is similar to tlou and a little of twd. i'll include some upside down stuff with the infection to make it feel like st :D i'm currently planning where i want this universe to go, with backstories and relationship dynamics between the entire party - byler will be the main romantic relationship, but i'll also dedicate some time to lumax too. however, the biggest theme surrounding this au is found family for me, so while romance will still be important, i want to put a lot of focus on the entire group's dynamic as a whole!

#i've already designed and drawn the other three babies <3 i'm just trying to pace the posts and solidify details #also please ignore the moderate art style change i'm trying something new and its working #stranger things #mike wheeler #will byers #el hopper #willelmike #the party #byler #stranger things fanart #st apoc au #<- tag for this au #just bc i intend to be drawing way more of it!! #sammi's art

[damienns]

#this is how i imagined nepo baby kara danvers in jazz's latest masterpiece that got bratty ceo lena luthor looking👀 #kara danvers #kara zor el #karadanversedit #melissa benoist #melissabenoistedit #supergirl #supergirledit #dcedit #dctvedit #dcladies #dailysupergirl #supercorp #dc comics #dc multiverse #arrowverse #arrowverseedit #** #jazzfordshire

[t00thpasteface]

if you're lucky, you get to ride in a gold meteorite

if you're not, you get a mouthful of red kryptonite

#HAPPY (EARLY) BIRTHDAY KAL EL!!!! or should we call it his earthday??? anyway i'm sure Baby In Corn has been done before but hey #art #m1nty fresh hall of fame #dc #superman #clark kent

[ladybug616]

#NOT MY ART #there you go #pat pat #steven grant #moon knight #moon boys #my babies #layla el faouly #bi panic #mommyyyyy

[ky-landfill]

#superfam #kon el #kal el #conner kent #clark kent #de aged kon! #looking like his other daddy #superman #laser baby scene from The Boys

[anexperimentallife]

As an autistic adult parenting an autistic toddler, I'm glad I'm able to use my experiences to help my little girl, and start teaching her the lessons about dealing with it that I didn't learn until I found out as an adult that I was autistic.

Like, this morning she started screaming literally within seconds of waking up because @thesurestthing was in the bathroom instead of giving her morning milk (her usual routine--the hardest thing is starting the day with a break in routine).

Then she was screaming and kicking me in the face because she didn't want to wear a diaper, then she wanted her old pee-filled diaper back on, then she wanted NO diaper again. Then when Zoey returned to nurse her, "MOMMY GO AWAY!" (Because the routine was already broken, and things would not be Perfect no matter what at this point.)

Then (and this was the majority of the meltdown) she started screaming because "I want to feel daddy! I need to feel you!" I offered my hands, my arm, my beard, and my head, to no avail. All this while I'm being intermittently kicked in the face and trying to keep her from hurting herself or me. She tried several times to do her deep breaths, yelling, "I WANT A NEW FEELING!" But she COULD NOT calm down.

THE SOLUTION: It took approximately a century (or so it felt like) to figure out she wanted me to put my hand in the high-five position so she could put her palm against mine--at which point she took a couple of deep breaths and immediately started calming down.

If we can keep her chill for the next few hours--long enough for her body to get over the meltdown--she'll most likely be fine for the rest of the day. I'm just glad that I have similar neurodivergent patterns to hers, and that since I've begun to figure out how to handle mine, I can help her learn to handle hers so that hopefully she'll have an easier life than I have.

Update: headed off a couple more meltdowns by offering my hand again, and praising her when she did her deep breaths and got herself under control. She's so cool, and she works so hard at learning self-regulation. Then she just sat with me stimming for a bit, and we read a book together.

Right now she's being a total cuddlebug with me. I love her so much, and I wouldn't change a single thing about her if I could.

I just hope that by helping her learn about dealing with her autism early I can help her have an easier life than I've had. Not by pretending to be allistic, but by taking her autism into account and doing what she needs to regulate her feelings.

She is so perfect in every way, and I love her. Yes, there are challenges, but if I could wave my hand and make her allistic, I wouldn't do it, because that would fundamentally change who she is. She's autistic, like me. And she's perfect.

#baby el #autistic #actually autistic #autistic parenting

[thesurestthing]

I went to slice another bit of apple for my toddler and this is what she said while it was happening:

appuh appuh appuh appuh open you CUT YOU appuh

#words from bug #babyposting #baby el

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Phantom: *Kicks down the doors of the Titans Tower*

Titans core four: *Getting ready to fight"

Phantom: Which one of you is Superboy?

Kon:

Kon: Me obviously *gesturing to the large S on his chest*

Phantom: Cool. What custody days do you want?

Kon: You're going to have to explain

Phantom: *partially unravels the bundle of blankets to reveal a baby with kryptonian blue eyes*

Phantom: Congrats! You're a dad!

Kon: Oh god the card I got in the mail wasn't a prank

Phantom: Nope. Help me name him.

Tim: I have so many questions

Phantom: I have so few answers

Cassie: Thats not comforting

Phantom: I woke up in a mad scientists laboratory 200 years in the future to find out i have a clone baby with someone I've never heard of and everyone I knew and love is likely dead.

Kon:

Cassie:

Tim:

Phantom: If anyone needs comforting here its me

Nightwing: *the only adult in this situation* Okay, how about we talk about this. I'm sure the Justice League will be happy to help you and your baby

#fanfiction prompts #prompts #dp x dc #danny fenton #tim drake #danny phantom #kon el #kon el kent #superboy #I debated doing this with superboy or Damian #superboy won out cause im curious #kon is freaking out so hard #danny is refusing to abandon his baby cause thats the only family he has now and hes a scared 15 year old #might actually write this into a proper prompt later but rn im lazy

[hypewinter]

The summonings for residents of the Infinite Realms are constant. Across space and time they do not change. They require the same strokes in the sigil from past to present and the same breaths needed to chant from one edge of the universe to another.

Danny has always liked this as it has allowed him to see many wonders of history. And to visit many alien planets. He has met all sorts of people and experienced all sorts of events. But he has never experienced something like this. This time, he is summoned to a dying world. The planet exploding as its core devours itself. This time he is faced with two desperate parents pleading for him to save their son. But he can't. Living beings cannot be taken back through the summons. All Danny can do, is promise to guide their son to safety.

#dp x dc #dc x dp #dpxdc #dcxdp #winter's tales #danny guides a baby kal-el to earth where he knows he'll be safe #does he intentionally leave him with the kents? #or do they just happen to stumble upon the craft as he's deciding what to do next? #does danny remain a constant figure in clark's life? #or does he silently check in on the boy from time to time? #that's up to you

[awaitingrain]

Just another Supercorp Sunday 💙❤️

#supercorp #lena luthor #kara danvers #supergirl #kara x lena #kara zor el #supercorp fanart #fanart #supercorp endgame #she's her dork #kara danvers food baby #my art