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mechaknight-98 · 1 month

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Aggression (NSFW) FT Sohee Kim

Authors note: I wrote this in the delirium of Hay fever but I figured some of you might enjoy it

I try to steady my breathing as I wake up. My musth is coming in a few days and it's shaping up to be a particularly nasty one. I need to focus for the next few days as my performance at work has already been dropping and I can't afford for it to slip. after getting up my girlfriend (and fellow Alpha) Sohee stirs.

"You okay dear? It's 3 in the morning." Sohee asked. I nodded and went to go for my musth suppressants in the medicine cabinet. Shit they were empty.

"Honey I know you have been stressed and trying to focus better at work but you need to stop taking Musth Suppressants." Sohee pleads.

my hands tremble as I can feel the anger, lust, and raw aggression beginning to take hold.

"I know honey but I just need to get out of this Probation Period," I tell her.

"Babe you've extended taking them every time something new has come up. First, it was "I need to get this job" then it was "We need to finish the move" Now it's this. You have been suppressing yourself and you're just making your next musth that much worse for you. they aren't helping. You get home lethargic but restless so you can't sleep. You don't dump the hormones either by fucking or fighting. so they just sit in your body till the next must. I see it in your eyes." Sohee warned.

"But we fuck all the time?" I countered. Sohee rolls her eyes.

"While I may not be your type of alpha You and I both know Alpha biology requires musth/rut fucking, and competition to maintain a happy and healthy lifestyle," Sohee replied

I sighed trying to stay calm but I couldn't afford for anything to go wrong with this new job. I know she means well but sometimes she gets in my way...whoa that's not the thought I wanted. Sohee was not an obstacle. I loved her it's just rough right now.

It was just a stressful time right now. I couldn't afford to take time off since I had just been able to move out and support Sohee and me. We are also planning a vacation later in the year to celebrate our 5th anniversary. I ran my hands through my hair as I tried to figure out what to do next. Sohee sighed and said "This is the last time." as she handed me a bottle of over-the-counter musth suppressant.

"Oh, thanks, honey. You are the best." I say with a smile as she throws me those pills Sohee smiles as she walks up and kisses my cheek. I smile and slap her ass as she walks away.

"Hey be careful because you might start my rut, and I won't go easy on you," Sohee says with a sly smile. I laugh and take the pills before going back and having the most pleasant dream of having a lovely brunch with a very naked Sohee.

I wake up well-rested and get ready for work. while I do so Sohee also gets ready. As per usual she walks by naked so she can shower. Usually, my urges are painful but bearable. They aren't complete inhibitors after all (Sohee and I both agreed I shouldn't be taking those). I feel an intense burning sensation in my crotch followed by the equally intense, and almost ravenous wave of lust. I dig my fingers into the sink and stop when I hear a crack. Sohee seems to notice my discomfort and asks with concern, "Everything okay babe?" I breathe heavily before responding.

"Yeah, last round hopefully," I say. Sohee smiles

"Good. Now get ready before I force you to call in sick." She teases as she wiggles her cute butt. She always does this but today she looks so much sexier than usual. I just want to pound her until she begs me to stop. I watch drooling but quickly regain my composure. I finished getting ready and as I did Sohee met me to send me off. I smile at her hungrily as a familiar sensation in my loins burns, and my headaches.

"See you later sexy," I say with a level of confidence I didn't know I had. Sohee smiles as we kiss. Feeling emboldened for some reason I probe into her mouth with the kiss, and get lost in it before Sohee breaks it.

"Gosh, I forget sometimes that you're a really good kisser," she replies breathlessly

"Well maybe you could cancel your schedules and we just stay home today," I say not thinking clearly. Sohee puts her hands up in an x before she smiles.

"No, I need to go to this one. it's for our comeback, just wait for me at home," she says. I nod and fall into another kiss with her. I lose control again as I grip her ass tightly

"I Love you. I love this ass. This ass is mine." I growl. Sohee chuckles before she wraps a leg around my waist. "No other Alpha can satisfy me like you do." I continue. I smile ravenously when I hear Sohee mewl before she pushes me off. "Dinobardo we both need to go." Sohee protests. Her using my full first name excites me but also anchors me. I take it as a challenge to take her then and there. The horny Alpha Part of me accepts the challenge, but my rational brain kicks in and I remember that I don't have time for this.

"I am sorry Sohee I don't know what's wrong with me," I say. Sohee gives me an understanding smile

"No worries honey. Just go to work and come back," she says with an understanding smile. I nod and drive to work. I get through three hours before naked Sohee begins to run through my mind. I begin to pitch a tent and feel the brunt of my musth and fuck it's hard to stop. wave after wave of this unrelenting lust washes over me as if I am caught in a riptide of desire, but that's not the worst part. The hornier I get the angrier and more irritable I get. My senses get dialed up to an 18 out of 10, and every little thing can set me off. the leaky tile in the corner of my office. the tapping of someone's nails in the other office three doors down I sense it all, and it drives me ballistic. This isn't even counting the massive headache I was nursing. I crack my knuckles as I try to focus but the door opens and my friend James walks in. I look at him furiously, and he nods and walks out. I barely make it to lunch before I try to take a nap but all I can dream about is fucking Sohee. I groan and get back and power to work where the heat hits me worse. I claw into my skull as I try to ride out the waves and focus but my mind because foggier as it's consumed by fighting and fucking. I need to do one or the other or I will go feral. As I release my hands from my skull I see blood pouring and realize I may already be there.

I take a deep breath trying not to let my body control me. I do the meditation practices but it doesn't help. my erection is raging at this point uncontrollably. I take another deep breath before counting to ten when I get the call. I look at my phone it's Sohee. I answer

"What's up honey," I say.

Sohee chuckles, "Where's that husk coming from? Are you okay you sound weird." she replies. Her voice makes the feelings worse as imagine fucking her till she begs me to stop.

"I don't know I feel like my skin is burning and something inside me is trying to claw its way out," I answer as Sohee listens.

"Well, honey maybe the Musth suppressant reached their tolerance threshold and won't work anymore. You sound like you're going through like 5 months right now." Sohee suggests.

"It certainly feels like I am. I have never felt this horny and this angry." I lament.

"Dino maybe you should go home and wait for me." Sohee pleads

"I am almost done for the day though I have two hours left," I whine.

"Dinobardo Michaell Benedict Jr. Go home and wait for me. I can hear the lust and anger in your voice, and I almost can smell your scent from over the phone. Go home early and wait for me before you hurt anyone. I promise I'll take care of you while your body rages against you." Sohee demands. I hesitate before relenting. Sohee wouldn't use my full name if she wasn't serious so I'd better take this seriously. I shut all my work stuff

"Okay, honey I'll go. I'll talk to you later" I reply before I get up from my office and go to my boss.

"Oh Dino heading out early?" he asks I nod.

"Good. I was about to send you home as people were complaining about your Rut Scent. " my Boss joked. I groaned and nodded.

"See you next week boss," I reply

My boss smiles and waves, "Take care of yourself." he says as he sees me off.

I arrive home with no issue. I sit on our couch and try to sleep but every time I close my eyes visions of Sohee plague them. when I finally do get a normal dream my alarm blades off and says it's time to take more suppressants I get up and feel my head pounding. I steady myself enough to go to the bathroom and Grab two more pills I take them and I notice the temporin seeping out. My blood boils my suppressant was to stop this specific thing. I look at the bottle of pills, and it reads Maxwell lord’s Marvellous which is the correct brand, but under it in little tiny letters says “musth amplifiers” The flowery letters are hard to read as my brain loses the ability to comprehend complex tasks due to the musth fully taking over. Something tells me to take another too. So I did. At this point, my brain is made a horny and angry mush by the musth the heat of my own body has become unbearable so I strip to my boxers. I try to remember what I was doing or who I was waiting for as I meander over to my bed but I can't. I fish out my dick and begin to stroke it languidly now fully in throes and acquiescing to my body’s demand t try to relieve some of the build-up, but it does exceptionally little to ease the lust I feel. I need my mate. I reach for my phone but I can't remember the code to open it. It infuriated me as I typed in numbers that swam through my head. So I am teased by my mate’s face but I can't even remember her name no matter how much I scrape my head trying to. It only serves to worsen my headache and my temperament I can't even remember my mate’s name and this is the person I wish to mark…pathetic. I chastised myself and looked at the wall trying to clear the brain fog, but the more I tried to focus the more the brain fog intensified. Time space and conscious thought all became labored concepts in my heavily lust-addled mind. Then finally I heard the door open. I heard a feminine voice ring out,

“Honey are you okay.”

I labored down the stairs through an almost endless amount of growing lust and brain fog. When I get down my mate sees me with a wicked smile on her face. I couldn't focus as she wore a crop top pushing her perky breasts up and to attention and a very short skirt that flaunted her curves and ass. I couldn't reply

“You okay? You look feral” Sohee says with a smile. My mind clears enough to remember my mate’s name and I smile. I approach Sohee and steady myself on her shoulders. Sohee looks down at my boxers where she sees my bulge. She smiles at me as she lowers herself to my crotch. I groan as she releases my trunk and it flops on her face. Sohee looks up at me with a lusted smile.

“Oh honey, you've been walking around with this all day. Let me take care of it.” Sohee says and begins to suck. I groan as her warm mouth takes me inside. I finally begin to relief and for a moment my brain fog clears.

“Oh thank god dear that feels so good,” I reply. Sohee smiles

“You're back?” she says with a slight pout. She stops and immediately I'm stupefied again. She drags me up to our bedroom and she goes into the bathroom and grabs a bottle but I can't remember what it said or reads. She takes 3 pills out of it and gestures for me to take them. I shake my head as I get a bad vibe from them. Sohee gets at my eye level her brown eyes are full of stern concern before she says

“Take them. You need this,” she says. Not wanting to make her mad I take the pills she begins to strip down to her panties (which have a stain on the front) and bra. After an unclear amount of time, my brain fog cleared, and the amount of anger I felt as I recalled everything was unreasonable.

“You dirty whore I trusted you and you poisoned me,” I yelled. Sohee’s eyes turned to slits demonstrating her excitement.

“Oh and what are you going to do about it.” she challenged. I ripped her panties and bra open, bent her over, and plunged into her.

“Is this what you wanted? I balls deep in your whore cunt.” I yell as I thrust into her cunt which is unreasonably tight almost oppositionally so. As I fight through the tightness I hear Sohee moan in ecstasy. She loves it when I get rough with her.

“Are you about to cum whore.” I ask as I pound her pussy with reckless abandon. I grab her ass and squeeze as she moans my first release comes and it comes hard. I explode into Sohee’s pussy and she moans as her walls milk me for everything I'm worth. After 5 minutes her body calms down but mine does not. I plunge back into her and she moans again I lift her back up so I can get a nice grab of her ass and tits.

“You got me riled up. You wanted my musth well here it is whore.” I say as I fuck and grope her body relentlessly. My heart hurts from what I'm saying but my body is so enraged and off normal that my brain can only continue to degrade her sinful body. I knead her Tits and ass loving the softness and bounciness of her body has as I manipulate it. I begin to feel the musth deeper, and it exhilarates my body and causes me to fuck my honey’s body with more fervor.

“That's it honey let all that cum and testosterone out,” Sohee says in between moans. I slap her ass out of spite causing her to release a surprised yelp.

“Don't tell me what to do whore. You're only used to me as a cum dump. So shut up and take it all. As I cum into my girlfriend again. She finally cums for the first time as her body goes limp from exhaustion. She falls on the bed limp but my erection hasn't let up. My body is still not mine currently so I watch my girlfriend try to recover

I watch as Sohee recovers she turns over and her eyes go to slits as I smell a familiar smell of toasted cinnamon. I chuckle having triggered her rut. She looks at my cock with a frenzied and hungry look. She pounces on me kissing and marking me. Despite my current status, I accept her mark and in return mark her back. She smiles

“Now it's official you're my whore. “ I grit and Sohee pushes me to the bed where she starts riding me.

“This cock is mine.” she moans. My hands reach out for her ass. I grab and squeeze it. The pliant flesh pleases me. Sohee grabs her tits and moans on top of me.

“I needed you to stop hiding. You're an alpha dammit act like it.” Sohee said as she slammed into my dick. I released my first moan. She begins to bounce harder and faster as her body takes over. Mine does as well as I thrust into her. We continue this merciless pace chasing our highs rather than comforting the other until both our bodies explode. I groan as the must refuses to die down. Sohee looks at me wildly and she keeps riding after that I kind of blackout. I fully give in to the musth and let it run my body

when I come to I'm slowly waking up to my dick still in Sohee. She is asleep leaving me lost and wondering what happened. As I stir Sohee yelps

“Ah careful I'm still sensitive,” she says. I nod and pull out of her pussy a deluge of cum follows. Sohee looks at me with a satisfied smile.

“You feeling better,” she asks and I nod.

“But why am I so hungry I ask

“Well, we have been fucking nonstop for 72 hours.”

“72 hours you're telling me we fucked the whole weekend away?” I asked concerned Sohee nodded.

“Yeah, I can tell your mind kinda left after the third orgasm because that's when the beast came out. I didn't know how strong you were.” Sohee teases. I nod knowingly

“Yeah, being hopped up on 180 times the testosterone I'm normally supposed to have pushed a lot of things out of me. I'm sorry if I hurt you while I was “intoxicated” I apologize

“Oh no you didn't I'm an alpha too after all I can take rough. Besides I have only heard stories about being with an alpha who has a musth it was thrilling especially since you triggered my rut. So we killed two birds with one stone.” I nod and reply to Sohee’s statement

“Also sorry about switching your suppressants with the amps. I was worried that when you did stop taking them you'd be too far gone and hurt me. So I wanted to get at least one large musth dump before our vacation.” Sohee says apologetically

“No that's fair I haven't been listening to my body and next time I'll just take the time needed to give into my musth.”I shrug and affirm

“Ooh I like that maybe I should edge you to the next one,” Sohee said as she reached down and began stroking me.

“Oh, you'd like that little slut.”

#kpop fanfic #fanfic #male reader #kpop smut #alice sohee #sohee smut

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imaginesmai · 7 months

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Right around the corner (3) - Azriel

LISTEN I CAN EXPLAIN if you've been here for a while now, you can expect this part. If not, may I present myself - hi, I'm Mai and I'm an angst queen bitch. Fourth part already on the way, don't worry!

(1), (2), (3), (4), (5)

Plot: the turth comes out, but in a way Azriel didn't expect.

Warnings: prepare tissues.

Azriel had taken his time to process the words, and in the meanwhile, he had received so many notes from his family that he had his hands full of small paper balls.

There were notes from Feyre updating him of the screaming match between Cassian and Rhysand, long texts from Mor promising him the house was a safe place for you and that he better hurry to bring you out. Even Amren had written a brief ‘I knew it, boy’ that had him more worried than before.

It wasn’t as if he didn’t want you to meet them. He loved his family like nothing else, and knew they would only be supportive and kind to his new status. Him being mated or not didn’t change the way they saw him, but part of him – the part that had felt rejection from his mother and his blood-family, was scared.

Azriel ended up sitting in the kitchen counter in front of you with a frown and a growing headache. Even though it was late and you had had a long day, you instantly noticed his mood.

“What’s wrong?”

It wasn’t unusual for Azriel to go quiet in your presence. You had learned by then that it didn’t mean you did something wrong. Most of the times, it was his insecurities popping up randomly in his mind, the troubles of the day dragging him away from you.

And through the years, you had learned that there was nothing else to do but to stay close to him and remind him that he was there. Right with you, and that you loved him.

Still, as you stared at him that night, you noticed it wasn’t the usual frown. He snuck glances at you and moved from the couch, where he was banned, to the kitchen. You left the bowl aside and stood in front of him, one arm extended so he could hold your hand.

“How do you know Feyre?” he asked, not taking your hand.

“Feyre as… the high lady?”

“Yeah. You greeted her the other day. You two know each other?”

“Guess so. She has her art study right in front of my bakery, haven’t you noticed?” you answered, not understanding the nature of the question. “When she moved in, I baked her a welcome to the neighborhood pie and she has actually painted two of the pictures I hang on the wall”

“Feyre painted pictures for you?” Azriel raised an eyebrow. “Are you two friends?”

“Well, not friends per say, but we know each other. That’s what usually happens when you work in front of someone else’s work” you shrugged, you open hand still empty. “Why?”

“I didn’t know you knew her”

“Should you know I know her? For any specific reason?”

“It would have been nice to know you know my high lady. My brother’s mate”

“Now you know. What’s with all this ‘you know I know’? Why does it matter?”

You didn’t understand why but there was an annoyed edge on his voice that you didn’t like. As a morning person, you usually went to bed early, and any minute past midnight was a minute you were supposed to be asleep. No matter how nice it was to spend time with Azriel and how good he had made you feel an hour ago, now you were annoyed.

The male stared at you, still not answering your silent call for his hand. One of his many shadows crossed the table and jumped at the chance of tangling between your fingers. That would have been enough to make you laugh any other day.

That night, you just stared at each other.

“Az, why are you so – “

“Because you should have told me, Y/N” he cut you off. “You know how important my family is to me, and I think it’s fair to ask that if you know any of them you should tell me. So I’m prepared for this”

“What’s this exactly? Late night discoveries about my neighbors?”

Azriel was quiet for a moment, frustration clear in his features. It was a stupid argument over a stupid situation, and Azriel being on his underwear and you only on his t-shirt without panties didn’t make it any less stupid. You rarely argued, and when you did, it was you who had the pointless argument and Azriel the calm one.

His shadows moved behind the couch and dumped in front of you a bunch of papers. They were all wrinkled and Azriel didn’t have time to hide them or think about how to approach the situation before a new one popped out of thin air. It landed next to your open hand, his shadow catching it and unfolding the content.

Does she eat cereal straight from the box? Is it why you’re hiding her?

You didn’t need to think hard to know it was talking about you, and who the note belonged to. In the past, Rhysand had sent notes to Azriel while you were having a shower together, in bed together, and one had even appeared inside your oven while he was helping you around.

“Feyre told them about you” Azriel explained, having read the note upside down. “And because I didn’t know you knew her, now they are deeply offended and want to meet you”

It took you a while to make sense to his words, because you couldn’t find the problem past you not telling him about Feyre. Quickly, you read some of the notes where Cassian threatened Azriel and Rhysand demanded his presence. They were friendly notes, no harm in them. Still, you couldn’t understand the utter sadness until you realized the meaning behind his annoyance.

Finally, you pulled your hand back to your side, not with little resistance from the shadow. You must have opened the bond channel because Azriel frowned, hit with sadness instead of the usual love.

The first note, where Rhysand explained that Feyre had told him, was what brought it all together.

“You haven’t told them you have a mate”

It occurred to you that you had believed it done with no proofs. You didn’t mind Azriel being at your house, living in your apartment. You didn’t mind having separate Starfall and lives. You didn’t mind either when he left for a family dinner and kissed you goodbye, because you understood his need of privacy, of having something that was just his.

What you didn’t understand until that moment that he hadn’t even told them you existed. And through all the reasons that ran to your mind at his silence, you couldn’t pick just one.

“It’s not that they don’t know me. They don’t know you’re mated”

“You agreed when I said I need to take things slowly. That I needed time” he blurted out suddenly, your sadness making space for his annoyance. “The bond was a surprise for me. I didn’t want to rush things”

“Azriel it’s been six years. Six! It’s not a casual fling or a one-night stand” you tried to voice your hurt, your sadness. “It’s not the same not meeting them that being a secret”

“It’s not like I keep you a secret. They haven’t asked and I haven’t – “

“Because you haven’t told them! What – How do you explain the days you spend here? And the… I – Azriel, we’ve been dating for six years and they haven’t asked?”

“They’re used to me sneaking around”

“For months?” you chuckled. “We were locked here for months after we mated. How did you explain that?”

His words were background noise because, above his absences, there was something you realized they should have noticed. Something anyone noticed from mated pairs as soon as they left the house. White noise filled your ears as he tried to excuse himself by talking about missions.

About your safety, about the worry of something happening to you if they discovered you were his mate.

Azriel blurred in front of you as realization hit you and tears filled your eyes. You could barely hold it together as you spoke.

“You’ve been hiding the mating bond” your breath hitched, because if there was something more important than your bakery, it was your bond. “They should have smelt it. But you’ve been hiding it”

“I didn’t hide it, please, don’t say it like that” his voice broke at the end, willing you to listen to him.

“Right. Because you can’t hide the bond from them unless you don’t accept it” you saw the moment your words hit him, the guilt in the way his shadows almost clouded your vision and his wings flared. “You didn’t accept the bond”

Azriel didn’t answer and, worse than any other betrayal or pain, it broke your heart. You remembered offering him the lemon pie, him tearing up and eating. Accepting the bond was an individual decision, one he should have made years ago – just like you did.

You still shared it; you still were mates. The only difference was that, while you proudly loved him and adored each part of his body and soul, he had rejected your smell on him, your imprint on his own.

An invisible hand cut off your air supply and your breath hitched. You covered your mouth with your hand and muffled the sob, but he felt the exact moment your heart broke. Even if he didn’t show it to the world, he could still feel you. Your feelings, your essence. His own eyes teared up and now he extended his hand forward.

A silent invitation, the same you had given him so many times when he was in need of comfort, of love.

But that time, you didn’t reach forward nor acknowledge the shadows that tried to pull you closer to him.

“Get out”

“Darling”

“Get out” you pointed a shaky finger towards the door.

“Y/N, please. It’s not what you’re thinking” he tried to explain, his voice broken by his sorrow. “I accepted the bond. I just – “

“Get the fuck out now!”

The bowl that you had been filling with lettuce, salmon and other vegetables flew from the desk to where he was standing. His shadows, by their own consciousness or his master’s, didn’t stop it as it crashed against his chest. It spilled all over his naked chest, and before he could clean it, there was another tray with grilled pork on your hand.

Azriel’s last look to you was of pure despair and sorrow. He winnowed away before the second tray could hit him, leaving you with his shadows already cleaning up the mess.

As soon as he was out of sight, you fell down to your knees and sobbed.

He didn’t have a plan, and when he winnowed away, the last thing on his mind was the sound of your heart breaking. There was no way he would go to his house and face his family, not when he wasn’t even sure what had happened in your apartment. Couldn’t start to comprehend the pain he had caused you and how much he hated himself for it.

So, without planning to, he ended up in the cabin.

The old wooden walls and ceiling greeted him, different from the ones he remembered from his past. Feyre had added drawings everywhere, there were clothes scattered around, and food that was still edible.

No matter how familiar the sight was, it offered him no comfort.

Azriel dragged his wings through the floor and sat on the couch. Propping his elbows on his knees, he hid his face as the first tear rolled down. Followed by many more.

He replayed your hurt voice once more, your face. It hadn’t been his intention to reject the bond, not really. But he hadn’t run away from it.

It took him two weeks of uncertainty to know that he hadn’t taken it the way you had. While you radiated with his scent, people didn’t ask him. He walked past Cassian during training and his friend just teased him for being disappeared for a month. Rhysand commented about having to report to him every now and then, and Amren didn’t even acknowledge his presence.

That was how he discovered that he had to accept his part of the mating process. He had to be proud, to want it, in order to complete it.

But you had been so happy, so full of joy and love, that Azriel had feared that telling you about it would make you sad. Eventually, he had learned how he should have done it – but at that moment, he didn’t know. Besides, he could still sneak whenever he wanted to without explanations. So he hadn’t said anything.

The first year rolled by, and he spent a good amount of days panicking about how to deal with the situation. The second year passed and you didn’t ask about it, neither did his family. By the fourth year, he had almost forgotten about it.

Azriel’s loud sob broke the silence of the cabin. His chest contracted and his body shock. It was different from any type of suffering, of pain, he had ever felt. He could still feel the echo of your own through the bond, could hear your cries in the distance.

In the lonely cabin, under the moon light, the shadowsinger sobbed and cried until his voice was raw. He was angry at himself, at his past and his traumas, even angry at you. Because now that he knew what it felt to be complete, to be happy and safe in someone’s love, he couldn’t bear the thought of not having it.

His body gravitated to the side and he curled himself in a ball, still in his underwear. It reminded him of when he was a kid and would try to hide himself in the dark cell, cowering in his fear and desperation.

As if he was a kid all over again, Azriel let his wings cover his body and cried. Cried until he couldn’t remember his name, until he was begging the Cauldron to turn back time and let him accept the bond. Carry you on his arm around Velaris and don’t let the fear take control of his life.

He felt like punching a hole through the wall. Like flying thousand feet up and letting go in free fall. Maybe get into a bar fight and let everything out. But his body was anchored to that couch, to that pain. Azriel pressed his closed fists into his chest, trying to relief some of the pressure.

While he wondered if that was what having his heart ripped from his chest fell, he forgot to keep his mental shields up.

Letting Rhysand in.

The house of wind had been chaos for a few hours.

Rhysand had tried to manage the situation by himself, wide awake in bed while processing Feyre’s words. He willed himself to sleep, to rest and leave the pondering for the morning. But when he tried to close his eyes, he could see Azriel covered in blood and killing an entire camp because an illegal wing clipping. He could notice the faint, new smell in the house that he hadn’t noticed.

If he had his eyes open, he couldn’t help but look at Nyx’s new toy.

So, Rhysand had woken up Cassian, after Azriel hadn’t answered his notes. And Cassian had been mad. Angry, furious, raging. The general had talked nonsense about berries for a while and then he begged Rhysand to wake up Feyre and find Azriel to interrogate them.

And, who was the high lord to deny a late-night gossiping session?

Feyre had been mad but she had told them that Azriel had a mate that worked in front of her art studio, in a bakery. That you were nice and cheerful, that you had been mated for six years.

That was when Cassian lost it and woke up the whole house.

Now, all the members of the inner circle had gathered in the council room with their pajamas on.

“Maybe it’s not true. Feyre, you might have had imagined it”

“Are you calling me a liar?” Feyre raised her eyebrows at Cassian.

“I’m just saying he would have told me! We’re brothers. And we don’t keep secrets in this house. Never.”

“You don’t keep secrets” Amren cut him off, not looking at him. “Your bean brain is too simple to keep any type of secrets from us, but that doesn’t mean all of us are exhibitionist”

“I’m not – “

“You are an exhibitionist. You announce everything, Cas. Even a fart” Mor corrected him before he could defend himself.

“Sorry for being kind enough to not keep secrets from my family” he frowned, turning to look at Rhys. “You keep secrets from me?”

“I don’t keep secrets from you” Rhys assured him, half a smile.

“He threw the sword you gifted Nyx for his birth and told you Bryaxis took it so you wouldn’t look for it”

Feyre looked at her mate with a raised eyebrow, daring him to say anything else. With a wide-awake Nyx in her arms, she looked at threatening as the Hybern army. She had yet to talk to him privately, but Rhysand knew he was up for a long talk. So he bit his lip and turned to Cassian. Who, of course, looked completely broken and defeated.

The rest of the group was silent, barely keeping their smiles to themselves. Even Nesta, who had a hand on his shoulder, was looking at Feyre with approval. Cassian stared at Rhysand for a long second before he talked.

“It was a nice sword”

“For a teenager, maybe. For a baby, not” Feyre answered again. “Weren’t you just talking about Azriel’s betrayal and secrets?”

“I, for one, knew he was hiding something” Amren commented for the third time. “Just saying I noticed. And you didn’t”

“Not all of us are creeps that stare and don’t talk. We have social lives to take care of” Mor said.

“Some of you do talk. Maybe too much”

Rhysand tuned out Amren and Mor argument when he felt a crack through Azriel’s mental barriers. He had been tugging at them softly to know where his brother was. Feyre had talked him out of the idea of barging in uninvited and demanding answers – at least, he had talked Amren and Mor out of it. Rhysand and Cassian were still unconvinced.

That was why he had kept a talon poking at his mental barriers since the argument started, thinking it wouldn’t be successful.

But then, Azriel opened it unconsciously and Rhysand brought a hand up to his chest.

Everyone fell quiet as the high lord scrunched his eyebrows and pressed his lips together, not ready for the wave of emotions and pain Azriel was feeling at the moment.

Feyre’s hand was instantly on him, Nyx looking up to his father with a pout that would surely turn into a crying session soon. Before the baby could start crying or any of his friends could ask him about it, Rhysand accepted Feyre’s help and got up from his chair.

“He’s at the cabin” he announced, already summoning his darkness to swallow Cassian and him there. “We’ll keep you updated”

Nyx’s loud cry was the last thing they heard as they winnowed away. And the first one they heard from the cabin, was Azriel’s broken one.

Want to read more? Check out my side blog @imaginesmaimasterlists, where I keep all the masterlists! Feedback is always appreciated

Right around the corner taglist:

@lesliemurillo @impossibelle @polli05927 @florencemtrash @going-through-shit @minakay @setayeshmohseni @torchbearerkyle @esposadomd @amysangel @kennedy-brooke @originalcrusadetrash @luvmoo @historygeekqueen @marriedtolike18fictionalmen @wallacewillow0773638 @tothestarsandwhateverend @kristalhi @knmendiola @nikt-wazny-y

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atinysunbaby · 4 months

Text

@ateezluvv asked :

heyyy...could you please make ateez having crush on you? aaaand you are songwriter at KQ too....thank uuuuuu

Thank you for asking! I hope you'll like it even though I didn't make it the exact way you wanted and it took me an eternity to write, really sorry about that. :(. I wrote a different job for each member, because I felt it might be more entertaining that way. <3

⌛Ateez Hyung line having a crush on you⌛

💖Park Seonghwa💖

"Park Seonghwa." You call your next patient's name, standing while holding the door separating the offices and the waiting room. You analyze his every actions and movements, like the boy's eyes widening slightly at the sound of your voice, the pathetic non subtle attempt at taking a shaky breath in hopes to slow his sudden rapid heartbeat, his hands and legs trembling as he stands up and the corner of his lips he can't seem to control that are starting to form a smile.

"Hello Dr. L/N!" You nod with a smile and gesture for him to follow as usual, scoffing under your breath in amusement, the excitement you could hear in those 3 words and the higher tone of voice he used, added to his reddening cheeks and averting eyes, this man really can't keep his emotions from showing.

You position yourself at the entrance of your office, gesturing for Seonghwa to enter. "Please take a seat and we'll get started."

The boy obeys immediately, maybe a bit too fast in your perspective, but letting this slide as well, you sit behind your desk and proceed to ask him a few personal questions. "So tell me Mr. Park, what is the reason of your urgency?"

"My what?" He asks, his voice almost a whisper and wearing a confused expression, waiting for your possible explanation. "Yes, you called my secretary and asked to get the closest appointment disponible.. or was that not the case?"

"No- I mean yes.. It's because of headaches, I get them everyday and I can't focus on practice anymore when it gets to intense." He lets out frustrated, clearly it has been affecting him for a while. "Any other symptoms?"

"Umm- no, I don't think so." You nod and type a few informations in your computer. While being occupied, you can still see the way the boy bounces his legs in nervousness and the way he can't seem to loosen up. "Are you sleeping enough, eating well, hydrating?"

"Well, sometimes?" At that, you give him back your full attention, concerned about his wellbeing. "Sometimes? What is sometimes? How many hours of sleep do you generally get, do you eat all of your meals and what kind of food, how many glass of water per day?"

"I'd say.. 4 hours per nights, sometimes more or less. I drink whenever I can, which I believe is not enough and every time I eat I feel sick, so I eat one meal, sometimes 2 and it's mostly ordered." You know he's an idol and you came to the conclusion that he was working really hard and it must be complicated, but you had no idea it was that bad. "Alright, you'll have to get a blood test and when I'll receive the results I will immediately send you a prescription for the supplements you need. I believe you are malnourished and you lack a whole lot of sleep."

He nods and sighs, feeling a bit helpless at his situation, it's almost impossible to stay completely healthy when there's a comeback and on top of that the group received death treats.

"You must know this already but, you really need to eat all of your meals and try to eat healthily, you need to sleep to regenerate your body and drink more water in order to function better. You might only be experiencing headaches now, but if this keeps on going at long term, there could be a lot of negative repercussions."

"I will, thanks miss!" He says with a blush coating his cheeks, slowly coming to realisation of the word he used. "You don't have to call me miss you know? Y/N will be just fine, if that's alright with you of course."

"No no no- I mean yes of course! It's totally fine- sorry.." He abruptly shuts his mouth because of the amused look you give him, never having felt more embarrassed in his life. "No worries Seonghwa, just make sure to keep this a secret between the two of us, I'm not supposed to get so 'friendly' with a patient and my colleagues wouldn't appreciate that I'm being so unprofessional."

All you receive is a flustered nod from the other and the sight infront of you is priceless. Seonghwa looks breathless and his whole face, neck and ears seems to have turned red, his lips are restrained by his teeth and it looks like they are about to rip from the pressure, in short, the boy looks like he is about to burst. "Seonghwa."

"Mmh?" He looks at you dumbly, as if his brain had just stopped working and he turned stupid. You scoff in disbelief, but mostly because you find him adorable for behaving like you are some kind of goddess. "You can breathe sweetheart."

And with that his whole chest deflates, as he lets out the breath he was holding.

💙Kim Hongjoong💙

Being a teacher always has been your dream job, and for the last few months that dream became a reality, but you wonder now if you might have made a mistake.

Everything that comes with teaching, other than educating people on your favorite subject, is actual crap. Even though you have considered unimaginable scenarios while trying to prepare yourself to this world, it is nothing like what you imagined.

You wanted to quit after weeks of feeling absolutely miserable, but something-no, someone held you back. Hongjoong. That cute boy in one of your class who always pays attention and participates as much as humanly possible.

While the others always treat you like shit, being disrespectful and making disgusting comments that affect you more than you thought they would, Hongjoong stands up for you. He shuts them up real quick which you think is really sweet, but he's your student and it can be nothing more than that. Your delusional self will need to forget about that perfect man and move on.

"Alright guys remember about what we covered for the last two weeks, most of it will be in the exam. Have a good day!" Your students, although disrespectful most of time, salute you on their way out when they feel like being polite, which in your opinion is somewhat even worst. Because you know they know that they make you feel worthless, but they only care about themselves and their image.

"Excuse me miss?" There it is again, that smooth, angelic, soothing and irresistible voice calling for you. Trying to calm the untamable beating of your heart and put on the mask of a teacher who's totally not head over heals for her student, you answer the boy with a charming but neutral nevertheless tone of voice. "Yes Hongjoong what is it?"

"Could I speak to you for a second.. like privately?" He adds the last two words in reason of the numerous students walking around the corridor, you also don't fail to notice him looking quite uncomfortable and proceed to leave the door ajar, to not cause any misunderstanding..

"I just have a certain, uhh.. I need to tell you.. something." He fidgets endlessly which makes you even more nervous, but you remain calm as your 'student' needs you. "Of course what is it, you can tell me anything."

"I.. just kind of like you, like a lot." He throws the confession at you and acts like he's the one in shock, gasping with his eyes full of what resemble fear and hands coming up to hide his gapping mouth. You on the other side, stop breathing completely. "W-what?"

Then you know it wasn't the reaction he was hoping for, because panic settles in his already overwhelmed with emotions' body and mind. "Oh no- please I'm sorry! Could you please maybe forget I ever said that? I don't- it was a lie! Yes I lied-"

"Oh my- you did nothing wrong, no need to panic, just take a deep breath babyboy. " At the beginning of your sentence, you watched as his body relaxed and he started to regain control of himself, but after that you lost the poor boy. "B-babyboy?"

You didn't mean to call him that, but you don't regret it after seeing his reaction. You try to hide your laugh behind a cough, but he catches it quickly. "Are you laughing at me? Was that a joke?"

He looks so heartbroken that it sends a sharp pain through yours, an adorable pout makes its way onto his face without his knowledge, small unshed tears gather at the corner of his eyes and his eyebrows furrow in sadness, making his forehead slightly scrunch up. The poor baby looks way too cute when he's sad, and you shouldn't think so. "No don't cry, it wasn't a joke! I didn't mean for it to slip out like that, but if you don't dislike the nickname..."

"Really?" You have to stop yourself with everything you have right now, to not hug the life out of this precious little human. Fortunately, it seems that luck is on your side today, and the boy is the one reaching out for you. "Umm, would it be ok if I hugged you?"

"Come here." And of course you can't resist, squeezing the boy in your arms in a tight hug and he melts against you, his hands gripping the back of your shirt in fear you'll let go.

💛Jeong Yunho💛

"Hello! Is anyone here?" You hear a deep, masculine voice call out for someone and you hurry to put the tiny kitten your holding in its cage with her siblings. "Yes I'm coming, just a second!"

"Oh there's no need to rush, please take your time." The man kindly responds and you smile at the gentleness in his tone, hurrying your task despite not having to. You don't want to make the boy wait when you have the time for him immediately.

You enter the main entrance with hurry and enthusiasm for a potential new customer, more then ready to greet the person waiting in the room, but your usual joyful speech is cut short when you are met with who you think, is the most handsome man you ever saw. "Welcome to the shelter... Umm I'm Y/N, how can I help you sir."

You gulp unintentionally, all of the confidence you usually have for other animal lovers like you is thrown out of the window from the moment your eyes meets. His smile is as bright as the sun and you swear you can see twinkles in his beautiful brown eyes, his aura gives off positivity and pure happiness and it makes you smile unknowingly. "Hi I'm Yunho, I'm looking to adopt a dog."

"Oh right- of course, we have a few little treasures at the moment! Would you like to meet them?" You ask in hopes that he would agree and end up taking one of the unfortunate pups currently residing in cages after being abandoned. "Yes! I'd love too."

Your heart flutters at the sight of his beauty and sincerity, showing off all of his perfect white teeth, eyes squinting slightly, giving him such a cute appearance. "You can follow me! I'm sure they'll be really excited to spend some time with you."

"I'm excited too. I've thought about this for a long time and I already bought everything necessary, bed, food bowls, toys, food, treats, blanket and- maybe a little too much actually." Yeah, excitement is clear in his tone and you can't fight the grin from appearing on your face. "I'm really glad to hear that. A lot of people who come to adopt some of our animals don't seem to care much."

"Really? Who wouldn't be looking forward to this? I mean especially if they come here in the first place." You're shocked for a second, the more he speaks and the more you are pleased by his kindness. He seems like a gentle and caring person, exactly the type of person a pet needs. "Right! That's what I thought, they don't deserve to adopt one of them if they act like that."

You turn to him slightly while opening the door to the dogs' room, both exchanging an interesting glance and you blush slightly at the way he carefully watches you. You wonder if he has been looking at during your whole small conversation and if he did, you hope you didn't do anything embarrassing. "We're here."

Your voice his small and you silently curse yourself for appearing so shy and nervous in front of someone you just met. You proceed to open the first cage, letting the 1 year old corgi out and introducing him to Yunho. " This is Pudding, he's a pretty active little guy, cuddly and he listens well to the instructions he's given. On the day he was brought here, he whined and didn't wanna come out of his cage for days after, he was so sad. Poor baby."

"I can't imagine abandoning a small being like that, they must go through so much pain." The pained expression he wears now, confirms his thoughts and you try to brighten the mood up a bit. "Fortunately, there are some amazing people who come here to save them."

Yunho giggles, knowing the intentions behind your words and appreciating your efforts to make his visit as pleasant as possible. "Well, there's also the kind and beautiful girl who takes care of them during their stay."

Your mouth hangs open in surprise, heat rising to your cheeks and you can't help but hide your face behind your hand in hopes that your heart will slow down. Yunho chuckles and the sound sends shivers through your whole body, he keeps getting more and more attractive and you don't know how to act anymore. "W-would you like to meet Rocky now?"

"Mmh I don't know, I think Pudding and I are already inseparable." He pets the dog who has fallen asleep in his laps and you can't help but let out a small laugh, happy for the puppy to have found his new family. "Really?"

"Yup, he's my little buddy now, if that's alright of course." He scratches behind the animal's ear and looks at him dearly, you know at that moment that Yunho is perfect for Pudding. He's going to be loved and cared for like never before and you just have a feeling that he will never be sad again. "Thank you, I'm really happy for you both. All that's left is some paperwork to fill and you'll be able to take Pudding home."

You both make your way out and back into the lobby, Yunho holds the still sleeping dog in his arms and walks carefully not to wake him. You take out a small folder with a few pages document he has to fill and you wait patiently while he writes down the informations needed.

"All done!" He exclaims, keeping his voice low so he doesn't startle the small baby asleep against him, he grins at you but it disappears almost instantly, a nervous expression replacing it instead. "Will I see you again?"

"You mean here at the shelter?" You ask hoping that he wants to see you for another reason than regarding his newfound friend, you don't want to sound like a fool if you answer his question after reading his intentions wrong. He laughs, this time it's so quiet and breathy that you almost don't catch it. "No, I mean... Can I have your number or something? I want to see you again, like to get to know you- if you want to of course, if you don't, I'll respect your decision."

You hesitate, only for a second, not because you don't want to, you would without even having to think about it, but you're at work and you shouldn't be fraternizing with a client. You quickly decide that it's worth giving it a shot and if you get in trouble, you'll deal with it then. You write your number on top of the folder containing Pudding's birth certificate and other important papers and hand it to him, feeling giddy and nervous. "I'd want that too."

You both exchange one last smile and Yunho leaves with the promise of contacting you as soon as he can. You're already looking forward to seeing him again. "See you Y/N!"

💜Kang Yeosang💜

You were working as a staff member at KQ, mostly assisting everyone you could with their jobs and making their lives just a bit easier. When they found out that you have a degree in kinesiology and worked at a gym for some time, they proposed that you become a personal trainer to some of the members.

One of them being Kang Yeosang, the prettiest human you've ever laid eyes on, ateez's precious and sweet baby who is loved and recognize for his cuteness, is groaning and huffing as he works out only a few meters away from you.

You make eye contact every once in a while through the mirror and you try to make it look like you weren't just checking him out, clearing your throat and nodding before taking some notes on your pad, but deep down you know he must be aware. "I think if you move your arms a bit more sideways it'll be safer. Wouldn't want you to strain a muscle."

"Like this?" He proceeds to do as instructed and you nod with a smile, letting him continue on his own. Truth be told, Yeosang doesn't really need a trainer, but he insisted that you at least stay and watch him so you can take notes on the mistakes and help him improve.

You should keep it professional and not make him uncomfortable, but everytime he goes back to his exercises, you can swear you can see a smirk appear on his face. As if he is teasing you and enjoying your reactions, it's only adding fuel to the creeping fire in your stomach.

His muscles are bulging, almost threatening to rip his shirt with how tight it became since he started an hour ago, a big proof of his efforts. The veins on his arms and hands, a result from all the weight lifting and it's attracting your eyes like a magnet. The sweat coating his skin and making his hair stick to his forehead doesn't make him look bad in the slightest, actually it's the first time that you aren't disgusted by someone else's sweaty figure and you can't help the way your body responds to the man, who is now walking towards your smaller form and towering over you.

You don't know if you were right to agree and take the job, because in this very moment, having to be so close to him is leaving you breathless and you're scared you'll end up reacting in a way that'll make him hate you. He's searching for your eyes, trying to get your attention, but you're so deeply lost in your thoughts that you almost gasp at the feeling of his fingers on your chin. He lifts your head so you meet his gaze and arches one of his eyebrows in what you think is a mix of amusement and interest. "So did you enjoy the show?"

"W-what- are you- you're.. I. I didn't!" You can barely breathe as his overpowering aura engulfs you and it overwhelms you to the point you can't form a whole sentence. His reaction to your response is what makes you break and you try to get away from his grasp, but he only grabs you face more forcefully this time and backs you against the wall behind, almost pressing his whole body against yours. "Now I didn't take you for liar little one."

You accept your fate, his eyes boring into yours and he looks like he's about to devour you. His expression changes from lust to concern in a matter of seconds when you start to tear up, maybe from embarrassment or because everything is too much at the same time, you have no idea. "Are you ok, do you want me to stop?"

You shake your head, but a tear falls followed by your lower lip starting to tremble. Yeosang takes it as a clue to stop even though you say otherwise. He slowly releases your jaw and backs away only enough to give you some space. "Did I hurt you or scare you?"

You reassure him by shaking your head once more, reaching for his hand without realising, only to stop mid air when you do. He notices immediately and smiles sweetly at you, bending to your height slightly before he takes you in his arms, holding you close to his body. "You can touch me if you want, it's ok sweet baby."

"Now do you wanna tell me why you were crying mmh?" He asks gently, not to make you cry again and you try to regain some control over your body, taking a deep breath and thanking Yeosang for being so patient and understanding. "I.. don't know, just felt, like too much."

Hearing your words Yeosang is in dilemma, between squishing you to death from finding you so adorable or kissing you till you can't breathe anymore, but since he doesn't want to overwhelm you again he opts for a more self restrained option. "Can I kiss you?"

You barely have time to nod before his lips are on yours, the gentleness in his touch makes you relax against his chest in less then a few seconds. Your hands reaching up to tug the hair at the back of his nape which results in a deep moan coming out of his throat and you shiver at the sound. Just before it escalates, he slowly parts from you and you both can't help but smile. He pecks your lips a few times before confessing. "You don't know for how long I've been wanting to kiss you."

Maknae line

306 notes · View notes

navstuffs · 1 year

Text

Emptiness

Pairing: Leon Kennedy x GN!Reader

Summary: You are dead, and Leon wonders why he is still alive.

Warnings: MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH, long one-shot, leon is suicidial, suicide attempt!!, leon is depressive, MAJOR ANGST, abuse of alcohol, some usage of y/n, cigarettes/smoking, leon is a mess, SAD SAD SAD!!!, leon is suffering a lot, lots of pain, NO HAPPINESS!, dates in italic count since reader's death

Author's Note: idk, except i am sorry i like to make the characters i love suffer and share that on the internet? i made my husband read this, and he doesn't care about leon whatsoever, and he ended up upset for him at the end so you can imagine how this goes. i have more happy leon's fanfics, you can check it out here!

PLEASE, PROCEED CAREFULLY, AS THIS FANFIC DESCRIBES SUICIDE, SUICIDE ATTEMPT, DEPRESSION, AND ALCOHOLISM.

If you have been struggling with depression or suicidal thoughts, you are NOT alone! Here is a link for tumblr support for some helpful information, depending in what country you are! Seek help, you are loved, you are strong, you are wanted!

3 months, 27 days, 3 hours, 5 minutes

The first thing Leon notices when he wakes up is that he is cold. He isn't wearing a shirt, and for some reason, the blankets covering his body look dirty with some unknown substance. He groans, throwing the blanket on the floor. He still wears the jeans from last night, has no shirt on, and doesn't smell well.

The second thing he hears is his phone's ringtone. It had to be Chris. Or Claire wondering if he is alive. He sits up, his hand rubbing his face as a way to make the headache less.

The third thing Leon notices is his hand resting in the empty space of the bed. Your empty space on the bed. He gulps because he hasn't touched that part since returning to the house. He raises his hand as if Leon contaminated the area, the last pieces he had of you.

Leon glimpses under your pillow a very familiar black shirt. One of the ones he gave to you. Leon doesn't remember grabbing it last night. He holds it, checking if he got dirty, but the shirt seems clean. Leon takes the shirt to his nose, smelling it.

His phone rings a second time breaking his trance. He gets up from the bed and sighs when he sees the nightstands filled with beer cans. You would have hated that.

When he finally finds his phone on the bathroom floor, Leon's headache worsens when he sees Chris's name.

"Yeah?"

"Fuck Leon, I was on my way to your house right now. You scared me, man."

"What do you want?" Leon isn't in the mood to talk, especially with Chris.

"Claire told me she went by your house last night, and you weren't there. She says the motorcycle wasn't there. Have you been drinking and driving again?"

Leon rolls his eyes. As if drinking and driving was a big problem for him now.

"Okay, mom, if that is all, then."

"Look," Chris sighs, and there is a long pause before he speaks again. "There is a mission. If you are still interested."

Finally, Leon thinks. He has been begging for one for weeks now, and Chris has always said "no," "next time," or "we shall see" due to his mental health situation.

"Yeah. When?"

"I will send you more details when I have it. Look, Leon, I just don't think you should—"

Leon hangs up without letting Chris finish. He scrolls through his lost calls, mostly all of them being from Chris and Claire. A few from Jill when she was trying to help. It got too much for her as well. Leon scrolls down even longer, finally finding your name.

Almost four months ago. Has it been that long? Two last calls.

As a ritual he repeats every morning, Leon clicks on your name, hearing the call go straight to voice mail. Precisely as he wanted.

Hi, this is Y/N, you tried to reach me, but I can't take your call now! Leave me a voice message, and I will contact you as soon as possible!

Beep.

-x-

4 months

Jill Valentine is sitting in front of Leon inside the jet. She hasn't looked at him once inside the plane as they are being taken to a contamination site. Her eyes are distant, her form is tense, and Leon maybe thinks that time can't cure it all.

"Preparing to land," They hear in their radio communications. Leon rechecks his gun, wondering without significant interest if any of that would ever end. When he looks up, Jill is observing him.

"You ready for this?" She asks with a mild tone of curiosity in her voice.

You knew Jill longer than you knew Leon, actually. You were her best friend before becoming his lover. Jill had given Leon all the solemn talk of "Don't fuck up with my best friend, or I will kill you." After your passing, Jill had become somewhat like a ghost in his life. She tried, Leon wonders, if not for you, to give him support in the first two weeks, but Leon knew deep down she blamed him.

And she was right.

"Yeah," He answers.

Jill nods. The last time she had seen Leon, he was miserable. With the longest beard Leon has ever had, bloodshot eyes, hair a mess, drunk, and the smell of cigarettes around the house. She told herself she would try for you, but it wasn't easy to see Leon like that. And after she said you would hate it if he smoked inside their house and Leon grunted that you were dead and never coming back, she left without looking twice.

She never understood why Chris and Claire continued. Maybe because they knew him longer than they knew you.

The plane finally lands in a safe space, and they exit. It is in an abandoned industrial area this time, and they might have survivors who live nearby and might need help.

"Do not fuck this up," Jill warns.

"I won't."

-x-

1 month, 1 week, 2 days, and 5 hours

Claire Redfield is knocking on Leon's door. It is way past dinner time, but she brings pizza. From your favorite place. Claire knows he won't have eaten anything since Chris kept telling her Leon is losing weight. Since your death, Claire has tried to help Leon out as much as she could because she knows that is what you would have wanted, to no avail.

"Come on, Leon, I have pizza! I know you haven't eaten today!" She announces.

That's when her sixth sense starts beeping. All house lights are off, which is strange: Leon either left the TV or any light on. Leon didn't like the darkness. Claire tries to open the door but is locked. Leon never locked the door since he was back for this house. With her heart racing, Claire goes to her bag and grabs the reserve key. She shares one with Chris, and they both trade every week. Leon doesn't seem to care, not that he cares about many things lately.

She enters the apartment to complete silence. No sight of him anywhere.

"Leon?" Her voice is distant, as her hands are looking for her gun. Maybe someone invaded and got him? Perhaps something else—?

The air escapes from Claire's lungs when she sees Leon. Hanging from the ceiling.

"Leon!" She screams, running fast to hold his legs. She doesn't know what she is doing, she is calling for help, she is trying to get a chair, she is trying to hold his legs up so he can breathe. Claire doesn't dare to look up.

With one sudden decision, Claire gets her gun and shoots three times at the rope. Leon's body drops, and he is pale as a ghost. She kneels near him, feeling his pulse. There is still one, very light, but there is one.

Without thinking twice, Claire starts CPR, Stayin' Live by Bee Gees, in her head. She knows Leon will hate her for this, but she can't fail this. She would have hated herself, you would have hated her.

"Come on, Leon, come on." She begs desperately as she compresses his chest with all her strength. When Leon finally breathes, a small vigorous one, Claire is sweating on her clothes. She sighs, relieved, sitting down on the floor, drained.

She grabs her bag and finds her phone to call the emergency number, asking for an ambulance. That her friend attempted suicide. She gives them Leon's address, checking for his breathing. When Leon opens his eyes, he is confused. The last thing he remembers is kicking the chair away, the air escaping slowly from his lungs. He looks around, finding Claire's face in his peripheral view. She seems to be crying, her hands on his chest.

His blue eyes find hers, and Leon looks with hatred in her direction for the first time that Claire doesn't recognize him. She feels tears form in the corner of her eyes, and her lips shake, but she holds them back.

"I have called an ambulance," Her voice shakes, and Leon's stare carries so much weight that she must look away.

-x-

1 month, 3 weeks, 8 hours, 2 minutes.

The hospital door opens, and Leon exits, carrying his duffel bag. After staying confined for almost two weeks, he inhales the fresh air. Those two weeks, instead of helping, just made him feel worse. Much worse. With no alcohol, no cigarettes, nothing, Leon had no way to forget. He woke up and went to sleep with your face on his mind.

Going through what he did wrong. What he could have done right.

He feels the pain sting his soul, thinking about your smile. Fuck, he needed a drink. He needed some sort of dubious mixed-up cocktail. The stronger, the better. When he looks to his left, he sees Chris Redfield standing.

Sighing, he walks toward Chris. Leon knows he won't be able to run away. Chris has a worried stare as he gets closer. To be honest, Leon thought he should have hated after what he did to Claire, but no, Redfield still manages to give him a small smile when Leon gets close.

"Hey."

"Who told you I was going to leave?"

"Mhm, the hospital? You are in my care for the next couple of weeks."

"I am going home." Leon starts to walk away from him, but Chris's arm stops him.

"No, you are not. As I said, you are in my care. And if I need to drag you to my car and make a scene in front of all those people, I will. What do you think?"

Leon hates how Chris can look like you so much regarding his care. Always to drastic measures, you both could say. Pretending to have given up, Leon holds his hands up as a sign of defeat and follows Chris to his car.

"Is...Claire okay?" Leon mutters as Chris starts the car. Leon can see Chris hold the wheel stronger than he should, but the moment passes, and Chris answers.

"She is worried sick about you. She has been...busy, that is all."

Leon knows that is a lie. He had seen Claire on one of the visitations day, and she seemed upset like she had been crying every day since she found him. Leon felt guilty Claire was finding him (he thought someone else would) and was outraged when she saved him. And he ended up lashing out at her. When Claire tried to argue during the visitations that is what you would have wanted, Leon roared that he never wanted to see her again.

To be honest, Leon is relieved. One less person for him to hurt. Chris, well, that one was hard. Leon knows he isn't giving up that easily. Especially after the last thing he said to you was that he would protect him during a mission.

"No, no, Chris, you don't understand, he bikes around without a helmet and thinks that is super cool? I mean, how old is he again? You better keep your eye on him, if I am not around. Got it?" You asked, winking in Leon's direction. He knew you were teasing him, but Chris's tone was serious when he answered.

"Loud and clear."

In the first three weeks after your death, Chris was there. He rummaged through the house, taking everything Leon could use to harm himself. Leon's guns were the first to go, Leon didn't know how he discovered the password, and honestly, he didn't care. He just woke up a day with them gone. Knives? Gone. It was like Chris was baby-proofing the house.

Leon would have lost much more weight during that time if it wasn't for Chris insisting on him eating. Or hydrate. Warning if he got too weak to take care of himself, Chris would have made sure to strap him to a bed and kept him there against his will.

"There are cigarettes in the glove's compartment," Chris says, cutting his line of thought.

Leon looks at him with suspicion before opening. Chris wasn't lying. There is even a lighter there.

"You smokin' now?" Leon asks out of curiosity.

"No. I bought those for you."

Leon lights up a cigar, opening the window. The rest of the car ride goes silent, and when they finally arrive at Chris's house, he turns off the car, sighing.

"Look, Leon. I am not very good at this, and you know it. You will stay with me as long as you want, but I can't keep you a prisoner in my house."

Leon observes him, and Chris takes the courage to finally say it.

"No one wants you dead, Leon. What happened to Y/N, it wasn't your fault. And you need therapy."

Leon gives a humorless laugh, opening the door of the car.

"You are not bad at this, Chris. You are terrible at this."

-x-

4 months, 1 day, 5 hours

Ada Wong is good at her job. She does what she is paid to do when she needs to do it. No feelings attached, except, well, when Leon Kennedy is involved. It had been like this since the events during Raccoon City.

And then, suddenly, you appeared on his side during the events in Spain. You were something else, for sure. Standing by his side, remaining strong, although that was your first mission, or so Ada heard. And facing up her, determination in your eyes. Ada found you adorable, perfect for Leon. The loyalty, in your eyes, was something she could never demonstrate.

The man in front of her now was just what once was Leon Kennedy, her..."ally" from the other side. Ada had to admit she was shocked when she first saw him, barely recognizing him. Leon had big dark bags under his eyes, not as strong as he once was. And there was...no life in his once vivid blue eyes. Nothing.

"Ada Wong. Doing something for yourself again?" Leon asks, his voice monotone.

Ada was used to his hostility, mistrust, and even anger. But not that complete apathy, a complete lack of emotions. Leon Kennedy was dead, she was confident, and he died when you did.

"You know I don't share my secrets, big boy," She says, her tone the same as always. "But we can always find common ground, as we always do."

Leon nods, and Ada tells herself she shouldn't care, she shouldn't ask. But she has never seen it like this, and this Leon frightens her.

"I have heard about Y/N. My condolences."

Leon's eyes go wide with surprise. He looks at Ada as if she has just arrived from outer space.

"Is this one of your schemes? 'Cause if it is, cut the crap, I am not in the mood."

"It is not. I heard about what happened." Is Ada Wong really showing empathy? Leon blinks, surprised, but he shakes his head. No, it has to be one of her tricks. Since when did Ada start caring about him?

"Shut up, Ada. Do not mention this ever again. We are here for a mission, nothing else, nothing more. Stop pretending you fucking care." Leon's voice is low, and Ada doesn't say anything as she watches him walk in the dark corridor before her. She has known him long enough to know when he is being serious, and she knows he is threatening her life now.

Ada sighs. The Leon Kennedy she once knew, was gone. You left a carcass behind, a damaged man for the rest of his life. Ada still remembers the last thing she said to you, before she disappeared.

"You are truly special. Take care of him."

-x-

1 minute

"Is Mr. Leon Kennedy speaking?"

Leon stops when he answers his phone to a strange voice.

"Yes? Who is this?"

"Mr. Kennedy, this is from McKenney Hospital. Could we speak with you in just a moment? Are you busy or driving?"

"No. Hospital, you say? What is going on?"

"We just need a moment of your time. Do you know Y/N L/N?"

Leon's heart starts bumping against his chest.

"Yes. What about it?"

"Y/N L/N was involved in a car crash today, sir. At this moment in time, they are doing surgery on them."

"What? No, excuse me, ma'am, this is some mistake."

The gentle voice behind the phone silences as she listens, Leon saying you weren't involved in an accident. It was impossible. You were coming to have dinner with him later, you were going to forgive him, you were going to be back together just fine. When Leon shuts up, the voice speaks again with much more compassion.

"You are tagged as their emergency contact, Mr. Kennedy. How long can you get in here—"

"I just fucking told you, lady, that is impossible, they are coming to have dinner with me, we are supposed to reconnect, and you aren't listening to me!" Leon screams the last part, punching the counter before him and making all the glass bowls in the counter jump.

The compassionate voice waits to speak again in a much more determined tone.

"Mr. Kennedy, I suggest you come to the hospital, not alone. Come with a friend. We will answer all your questions and concerns when you get here. Just don't come alone."

Leon turns off the call, pissed. How can the lady be so stupid? He told her over and over again you were on your way to his house, your house. Leon had been cooking the whole night, preparing your favorite dinner. After that, he would never let you away from him ever again. He breathes deeply now, trying to ease the tremors on his hands, when he lets his eyes wander off to the TV, a news broadcast about a terrible accident that happened. Some drunk driver caused this accident that involved a with a truck oil tank, and five people were killed. Many injuries reported.

Without thinking twice, Leon grabs his motorcycle's keys.

He doesn't know how he got in one piece in the hospital. Something inside him tells him to call Jill, Claire, Chris, or someone, anyone, but he doesn't. The hospital's entrance is chaotic, with most victims being taken there since it was the closest location.

Leon asks your name to the front receptionist, and they say they are operating you now. The lady points to the waiting room area, where Leon waits. Leon had felt fear many times in his life, but nothing compared to this. He knew you were strong. Stronger than him, actually. You were brave. You were getting out of this.

Because he didn't know how to live without you.

Leon observed families getting good and bad news for what seemed an eternity. The death toll climbed to more two people, a mom crumble in the doctor's arms due to the loss of his son and husband. Leon was praying, begging for some higher force or anything for you to live.

He would never drink again. Leon Kennedy would never let the darkness inside him win and let you go. He would never doubt himself or his ability to love. No, Leon would love you even more intensely than he already did, more than anything in his life.

Leon takes a while to get up when the doctor finally calls his name. He feels sick, his stomach is twisting. He counts nine steps until he gets to the doctor, a lady with scrubs and an indecipherable face.

"Mr. Kennedy, do you want me to take you to a more private room?"

"Tell me."

The doctor sighs, looking directly into his eyes when she says.

"We did everything we could, Mr. Kennedy. I am sorry they didn't make it."

No.

"I am sorry, Mr. Kennedy, I truly am."

No. NO! NO!

"Mr. Kennedy, please, don't, I am sorry. Can I get some help over here? Please, don't do this!"

It takes six or seven security guards to stop Leon from destroying the waiting room or even hurting someone. He is crying, he is begging, he is losing himself. It couldn't be true. It just couldn't. It was unfair: not after everything he had done or everything you went through together. He always told you he needed to die first because Leon knew damn well he couldn't live without you. Leon has a hole in his chest that will never close again. He feels someone pull his sleeve up, a pinching sensation, and Leon falls into darkness.

#leon kennedy x reader #leon kennedy x you #leon s kennedy x reader #leon s kennedy x you #leon kennedy #leon kennedy fanfic #leon kennedy fanfics #leon kennedy imagine #leon kennedy imagines #leon kennedy angst #leon x reader #leon x you #please dont hate me too much #but i had to :(#someone give reader to leon back please #i almost cried at the end of this I SWEAR

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lovings4turn · 2 months

Text

★ sick, but never of you . . . (luke hughes)

— when you're feeling incredibly under the weather, your boyfriend is there to look after you the best he can (1.3k)

+ warnings for mentions of illness and feeling sick. yes this is incredibly self-indulgent but i'm currently ill so you have to let me off okay !!!! first time writing for luke so pls don't be too too harsh !! banner from benkeibear <3

luke knew it was bad the moment he woke to the sight of your shadowed outline sitting up in bed, your body hunched over as muffled sniffling broke the silence in the room.

you hadn't been feeling the greatest all day, plagued with an annoying cough and pounding headache, but you had insisted before you headed to bed that you were starting to feel a little better, even assuring him that a good night's sleep would cure everything.

unfortunately, it seemed that sheer wishful thinking alone wasn’t enough.

something happened overnight, and you’d gone from bad to worse within a matter of hours. what had started out as a level of illness that was more of an annoyance than anything had spiralled to an obnoxious level of discomfort.

the blocked nose, the sharp scratch in your throat, the awful cough, and the pulsing headache would all be bad enough on their own, but experiencing them all in one sitting seemed like a level of torture that you definitely didn’t deserve. yet, here you were. and there was nothing you could really do about it.

it took every last ounce of strength in you not to cry.

you were just so frustrated. nothing felt right, and sleep was definitely out of the question; you were left with no other option than to sit and feel sorry for yourself, and hell, who could blame you?

"babe?" luke asked, voice thick with a blend of sleep and concern that already worked to soothe you a little. it was like your own personal medicine, washing over your body and allowing your muscles to relax a fraction.

"sorry," you all but croaked, and luke winced at the sound. speaking had to be impossibly painful for you right now, there was no doubt about it. "y’can go back to sleep, 'm fine."

your attempt at lying was already pitiful, but it was truly ruined when, not even five seconds later, you promptly burst into tears. luke’s extension of care had broken the emotional dam you’d tried to build up, and the wave of upset quickly came crashing over you.

luke swore that he could feel each individual crack splintering across his heart at the sight of you. how he was simply supposed to 'go back to sleep' right now, even if he wanted to, was a total mystery to him.

"hey, hey, c'mere," he mumbled, sounding more like he was addressing a wounded animal than his girlfriend.

without hesitation, he wrapped an arm around your shoulder and pulled you against him, his hand tracing circles on the small of your back as you sobbed into him. small ‘i know, i know’s passed his lips, and he hoped to any god that they sounded reassuring and not patronising.

a particularly rough coughing fit interrupted your crying, and you tore yourself away from him to cover your mouth. luke mourned the loss of your body against his, the warmth replaced by the telltale cold of losing your embrace.

"i feel like fucking shit."

your voice cracked at every word, even cutting out completely on some syllables, and the expression on your face confirmed that speaking was hell for you right now.

never had luke seen you so utterly broken, and it was killing him. he knew that if you were any more coherent, you would’ve kicked him out of your room instantly, not wanting to risk getting him sick.

he knew that, because it had happened many times before.

it was like clockwork, a dance you two had mastered over the years together. you’d get a slight cold, luke would offer to take care of you, and you’d shut him down immediately, not wanting your sniffles to be the reason the devils lost one of their defensemen for a game or two.

but this was far worse than a common cold, and no amount of convincing would be able to pull luke from your side.

luke sat for a moment, formulating a plan in his mind with a level of precision only otherwise reserved for his time on the ice. he gnawed at his bottom lip gently as he thought, a hand reaching out to brush the hot skin of your thigh to let you know he was still there.

after a minute, he spoke.

“alright, i’m gonna go grab some stuff for you and i’ll be right back okay?” luke promised, rising to his feet.

a stern, yet caring, look shot down your feeble attempt at arguing with him. nothing you could say or do right now would prevent him from looking after you.

“you just get y’self comfy, babe. i’ll be back before you know it.”

a kiss to your forehead sealed his goodbye, and the soft thump of his feet against the wood flooring became quieter as he made his way into the kitchen. you sniffled once more, wiping away the stray tears from your cheeks with the palms of your hands and propped yourself up against one of the pillows, sighing deeply.

remnants of luke’s warmth seemed to bleed along the sheets, tingling underneath your skin to remind you that he was here, looking after you, and he was happy to do it. a small smile tugged at the corner of your lips, and you held back from burying yourself into luke’s side of the bed despite your heart silently begging you to.

as promised, luke returned not too long after, balancing a few objects in his hands. whilst one hand clasped a steaming mug of tea, the other contained some painkillers and medicine you had in your cabinet, along with a bottle of cold water. luke had apparently grabbed anything in sight that he thought would help you out, and cupid’s arrow snagged your heartstrings once more.

within seconds your bedside table was decorated with his haul, and the mug of tea carefully handed to you with a warning that it would be hot. luke busied himself with figuring out how much of each medication you could take, making a mental note as to when you could have the next dose with furrowed brows.

his fingers stretched out to gently tap your palm twice, a silent request for you to hold out your unoccupied hand so he could drop the pills into them for you. the fact you had woken him up at god knows what time of night and his movements were laced more with love than exhaustion was truly a testament to how much he adored you, and it made you feel giddy despite your awful state.

a sympathetic sound left his mouth as he reached out a hand to cup your jaw, brushing his thumb along your cheekbone as though you were fine china, something delicate for him to cherish and admire.

“drink some tea and then try and get some more sleep, baby,” he said in a hushed tone, pressing a gentle kiss to your clammy forehead. “know it sounds impossible, but the meds should make it a bit easier for you. ‘m not going anywhere either, so wake me up if you need me.”

you nodded, lifting the mug to your lips and taking a small sip of the hot liquid. the fact that luke had brewed the drink in your favourite mug didn’t go unnoticed, and you gave him a fond smile over the rim of the mug as the beverage eased the strain of your throat.

as luke clambered back into bed next to you, pulling you into his side carefully so as not to spill your tea everywhere, your frustration began to fade, curling like the tendrils of steam coming from your mug and floating towards the ceiling.

though your sickness wasn’t miraculously cured, the soft kisses luke repeatedly pressed to the top of your head and temple provoked small bursts of happiness to erupt in your mind, like fireflies carrying a golden glow that paled in comparison to that of the boy next to you.

#.° ༘🗝️⋆₊ becca’s drabbles #luke hughes #luke hughes x reader #luke hughes x you #luke hughes fluff #luke hughes drabble #nj devils x reader #nj devils x you #nhl x reader

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animeomegas · 2 months

Note

Glad to see your wrist is doing better! ^^ a short and quick one; how do the Naruto boys handle trantrums?

Thank you! <3 Tantrums from their pup? Interesting idea! Let me see~

If their pup was having a tantrum about not getting a toy, or something similar

Bargaining:

Naruto - He hates when his children cry, so he simply can't help but bribe them with things to stop.

"Hey. hey, hey, what if instead of the toy, tonight we can play some video games together, how does that sound, huh?"

Yamato - He basically begs them to stop crying, and when that doesn't work, he offers something that he can give them instead.

"How about I give you a piggy back ride while we shop, do you want that?"

Deferring/giving in:

Sasuke - Panic, panic, panic. If you're there, he defers to you. If you're not, he gives in immediately so that the tears stop.

🚨🚨🚨

Shikamaru - Crying gives him a headache, and he doesn't like having to deal with it when the reason is so bratty. Giving in is the fastest way to get it to stop.

"I will give you 500 ryo to spend on toys if you stop crying now."

Taking them aside and talking them down:

Chouji - He assumes that they're over-stimulated, so he takes them somewhere quiet and let's them cry it out in a hug. Once they're calm, he explains why they can't have the toy, before bringing the pup back into the shop.

"Shh, there's no need for this, calm down."

Gaara - He's a big 'take the pup for a walk' kind of parent. If they have a tantrum, Gaara will take his child by the hand, and walk outside with them. Once they've calmed down, he discusses why they got upset.

"You're okay, I promise."

Removing them from the situation and going home:

Shino - He doesn't not like public tantrums. At. All. If his child starts having a tantrum in public, he is picking them up and bringing them straight home. He can get a bit frustrated if they don't calm down, but once he's at home, he can deal with it better. He probably puts a TV show on for them and sits with them as they calm down.

"We are going home. Why? Because clearly you cannot control yourself today."

Itachi - He takes his pups home too. They're upset, and when pups are upset, they should go home where they feel safe. He carries them home, and puts them in his nest. Once there, he gets them a snack, and they have a cuddle. Itachi will reprimand if it was super bratty, but mainly he comforts.

"We're at home now, it's okay. I think we need a quiet day inside, yes?"

Ignoring them:

Kiba - Kids cry for many reasons, some good, some bad, and Kiba is an expert at knowing which is which. If it's a stupid tantrum, he'll literally ignore them and keep shopping. He probably has loads of other kids with him too, like he can't just leave. So he lets them wail behind him until they've calmed down.

"Wow, this is a nice shop, I'm having a nice time, everything is good."

Haku - Haku also ignores the tantrum, but he spends the whole time talking to his pup as if nothing is wrong. Once they start calming down and answering him, he offers a hug, and then pretends that nothing happened.

"It's such a lovely day today, which kind of weather is your favourite?"

Discipline:

Neji - Neji is going to put the pup on the naughty step. If there's a space to do it in public, then he will. But if not, he'll probably go home to punish them. After one minute per year of age on the naughty step, Neji asks for an apology, and then gives them a hug. He probably does something quiet and lowkey with his child for the rest of the day.

"Why did you get put on the naughty step? I want you to apologise to me."

Iruka - There is also a punishment from him if the tantrum is very bratty. He takes them for a time out/cool down period. If he's in public, he makes the pup just stand against the wall for a few minutes. If they're at home, he has them sit in a room alone until they calm down. After that, he gives them lots of cuddles and tickles until they're smiling again. He might shout if he's already stressed, but he tries not to.

"I told you no, that means no. Stand here and think about what you did."

#omegaverse #a/b/o #headcanons #alpha!reader #naruto #sasuke #iruka #neji #haku #kiba #itachi #shino #chouji #gaara #yamato #hcs #alpha reader

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kteezy997 · 3 months

Note

can we maybe have some more lee content ?! you’re one of the few people that have written for him and he’s just sooo underrated !! i love how casually dominant you wrote him btw amazing characterization <3

Warnings: this is filthy smut, virgin reader, mention of condoms, unprotected sex, blood, female receiving oral sex while bleeding (sorry), mention of arousal, Lee enjoying the taste of blood? what do you want me to say? if you can't deal with blood, don't read this hehe

Make Me Yours// Lee (Bones and All)

You and your boyfriend, Lee, were traveling across the country together. No real destination in either of your minds. You were just driving until the truck gave out somewhere.

You had been a couple for a while, but things never got too carried away between you. You were young, and Lee was about three years older than you, and more experienced. He knew so much about the ways of the world. You felt like he was teaching you a lot about life in general. But these days, you wanted to know about sex, in particular, sex with him. You weren't sure if he even knew that you were still a virgin. You hoped that he wouldn't care; that he would still love you and want to be with you, no matter what.

"Lee," you started to say as you drove through the night, "I was thinking we could get a room somewhere."

"A room?" he asked, a smirk creeping onto his lips.

"Yeah, I think it'd be nice to sleep on a mattress tonight, instead of a truck bed for a change." Also, you could put your penis inside me.

Lee shrugged nonchalantly, "Okay, we'll stop at the next place we see."

"Okay." you said, scooting over close to him. He put his hand on your inner thigh, over your jeans of course, and you rested your head on his shoulder. You adored his natural scent. Most men needed an expensive cologne to smell good, but not Lee. He smelled of outside, maybe a little bit of motor oil from when he had to work on the truck earlier, and he always carried the smell of musk and pine intertwined.

You cupped your hand on his arm, his lightweighted sweater was soft and worn-in, such a delight to touch your cheek to.

"Are you sleepy?" Lee asked you, noting your snuggling.

"No, just wanted to be next to you." you answered.

You saw him smile and let out a tiny little chuckle. "We're almost there." he said, nodding to a billboard that mentioned lodging in 10 miles.

.......

You passed a small pharmacy on the way to the motel, and you made up a lie to Lee about having a little headache. You asked to stop at the pharmacy to get something to help with the pain, and he agreed.

"You want me to come in with you?" he asked, softly combing your hair away from your face.

"No, it's okay. I'll just be a minute." you smiled, then got out of the truck.

You ended up buying some condoms instead of headache meds. Now, to surprise your boy at the motel room.

"I'm sorry you're not feeling well, is that why you wanted a break from driving?" Lee asked you as he opened up the door of your room for the night.

"No, that's not the reason." you went over to the bed, plopping down at the foot of it.

Lee smirked at you, "What is the reason then?" he kneeled right in front of you, his hands tucked under your skirt, just barely.

"I want to have sex, Lee. I didn't buy meds for a headache. I don't have a headache." you took the pack of condoms out of your jacket pocket. "I bought these, actually."

He shook his head, surprised but very pleased, "Sneaky." He kissed you immediately and massaged his lips over yours with his signature sensuality. He put his hands on you as he climbed on top of your body.

You set the condoms down on the bed, just enjoying the kisses from your boyfriend.

His snaked his lips from your mouth to your cheek, then down your neck. He sucked your tender flesh there, leaving sweet little nibbles.

The grazing of his teeth sent shivers down your body. The heat between your legs mounted, and you were getting wet as he pressed his body against yours. "Oh, Lee." you cooed, putting your hands on his shoulders.

You felt his curly hair trickling along your jawline, his breath was warm against your neck as he said, "Y/n, I've wanted you for so fucking long." He left one more wet peck on your throat, then he reach up your skirt to pull your panties down. You were practically dripping when his fingers met your folds.

Lee watched your face as he rubbed your clit. His fingers were rough to the touch which made for excellent friction.

You rutted your hips against his fingers ever so slightly as your need for him grew stronger. You let your hand rest on his chest, and as he inserted a finger inside of you, you tucked your fingers onto his puka shell necklace. You shuddered when he introduced another finger.

His fingers left your pussy suddenly and you saw him taking his clothes off. He tossed his sweater onto the floor and untied the rope that he used as a belt. Your boy wasn't wearing underwear, and his hard cock was freed just by the removal of his mangled jeans.

Lee then helped you out of your dress, letting your garment join his on the floor.

You felt a little strange being naked in front of him, your breasts heaving up and down as your tried to control your nerves and your breathing.

He used his knee to part your legs, and he lay on top of you. His skin was comfortably warm and smooth against you, like a cozy blanket. He petted your hair, smiling down at you adoringly. He left kisses on your collarbone, then all across your chest. "You're so beautiful." he whispered, then cupped your breasts, softly kneading them.

Your nipples puckered in his palms, making you moan.

Lee held your tits in each hand, but left your hard nipples exposed so he could lick them. First was his tongue, then he put his lips on your left one, sucking, and moaning.

Waves of pleasure were sent straight to your pussy in a way that you hadn't know before.

He sucked your right nipple, leaving small kitten licks on the tender bud and softly bit down, and you whimpered. Lee chuckled lightly at your reaction. He moved his hips even closer to you.

You gasped as you felt the tip of his cock against the wetness of your pussy. "Lee, I-"

"Are you sure you're ready?"

"It's just that...I'm a virgin."

Lee couldn't hold back his delight, grinning, he said, "Yeah? Do you trust me?"

"Of course I do. I just...didn't want you to be freaked if there's, ya know, a little blood."

"I'm not afraid of a little blood." he admitted, kissing you firmly on the lips. He then hopped up from you and the bed, strolling over to the bathroom, retrieving a towel. "To go underneath you." he said.

You obliged, shifting on the bed to let him spread the towel out. You then got onto the towel.

Lee got back on you, putting his forehead on yours, "Let's make a fuckin' mess, baby."

You were taken aback a little bit. You knew your boy was special, but you weren't expecting him to be so intrigued by your virginal blood. You ultimately just chalked it up to him being in love with you and being your first.

"We'll save the condoms for later, I don't plan on coming in you this time." he said, his voice somewhat huffy. He looked between your bodies, and you watched as he lined his cock up to your opening. "Ready?" he asked, his green eyes searching into yours for affirmation.

"Yes, take me, please. Make me yours.”

Lee pushed his cock inside of you. You clung to him, thinking he would tear you open. You couldn't breathe, the pressure from his cock was too much. You held on, letting him slide in further. It stung like hell, but after a moment, it was amazing.

He started to pump in and out of you, increasing his speed slowly. His breath became uneven, and he groaned as he worked his hips. "Fuck, you're so tight, but so fucking wet."

The pain was still present, but the pleasure took the forefront. You cried his name; you dug your nails into his back to relieve some tension. His thrusts got quicker as the wetness between your legs grew. You knew it was your blood as well as your arousal. You were a woman now, his woman. And you loved it.

He was molding your pussy to the shape of his cock. Your body felt like mush, but in the best way. And Lee seemed to love fucking you with your fluids around his cock. He anchored his hands onto the cheap wooden headboard, and the structure creaked with his thrusts. His red tips took on a salmon-colored hue in the dimly lit room, and they bobbed beautifully as he bucked into you.

You felt his bony hips smacking the back of your thighs, you knew that you'd have bruises there tomorrow. But it was perfectly fine; just more proof that you were his.

He held your waist, and you put your hands on his tattooed ones. His hands were rough and scarred but that made you love him more. Every mark on his body made him who he was. If he hadn't had his past experiences, most of them too traumatic for him to even tell you, he wouldn't be the man you fell in love with.

You could hear the sloshing sounds his cock was making inside you. The sinful noise filled the room along with your whimpering moans. You looked down as he pulled his length all the way out, he was covered in red.

"I wanna taste you." he said, taking his eyes from his bloody member to your eyes.

You were stunned, "Really?"

"Yes. Please?" he pleaded, holding your legs apart.

You were horny, of course, and more than willing to let your boy do what he wanted, even if it was kind of grotesque. So, you simply nodded to him.

In an instant, his mouth was on your soaked pussy, lapping and sucking.

The suction was a lot for you to take, you trembled and threw your hands into his hair.

Lee slurped along your clit, licking up your blood and your arousal. It was as if he was sucking the virginal blood out of your body. He moaned like it was the best meal he'd had in years.

You were on fire with pleasure. Lee was squeezing your thighs as he ate you out. He flicked his tongue over your clit rapidly. Your legs shook, your tummy swirled with adrenaline. "Fuck, Lee!" you cried, knowing that this had to be an orgasm.

He continued going down on your even as you came down from your high. You knew it was just as much for his pleasure as it was for yours. He was enjoying this. Maybe he liked the taste of blood. Or maybe it was your cum that he was lapping up.

Once he finished, he perked up, looking down at you. His face was covered in blood from his cheeks down to his jawline, with dribbles trickling down his neck. There were even crimson smudges on his nose. A satisfied smirk was planted on his lips.

In the shower later, you couldn't get over how hot he looked as the water rinsed your blood off of Lee's face. The red collected at his chin and along his jaw for a second, before the stream turned pink as the blood diluted and ran down the rest of his body.

@gatoenlaciudad @thebetawolfgirl @musicandbooksaremyhappyplace @softhecreator @tchalamss @bitchyunknownuser @lixzey @kpopgirlbtssvt @ducktapebar

#timothée chalamet #timmy chalamet #timothee x reader #timothée imagine #timothee chalamet smut #bonesandallfanfiction #bonesandalllee

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yorshie · 6 months

Text

Burnt Out

Bayverse Leo x Fem reader - part 2

Part 1 Part 3

summary: SFW, After confessing your feelings for the Leader in Blue, he makes a decision that challenges your relationship with all four turtles. (warnings for relationship based arguments, yelling, and an altercation with some drunken men) set in 2023 so turtles are 24-25

I don't like one sided fights, so be prepared for reader not being passive. Also I have not proofed read so wording might get moved just a bit.

tag list: @jackalope-in-a-storm @tmnt-tychou @nessarolla-in-constant-flux

Mikey whistled awkwardly into your ear the whole way to the lair. At one point, you turned your head, about to ask what was wrong, when you caught sight of Leo’s face over Mikey’s shoulder.

His eyes were trained on your hands curled around the straps on the smallest turtle’s backpack.

You glared at him. He glared back.

By the time you were set back on your feet in the lair, your slight headache had fledged fully into a dull pounding that nicked the front of your skull. The ache was bad enough that you immediately turned to find Donnie, decidedly ignoring the others as they filtered into the cavernous space around you.

“Don? Can I get some Tylenol or something?”

He gave you his attention, hands cool as he tilted your head back and looked at your eyes. He hummed, and nodded. “Yea, some Tylenol would probably help. Let’s go get your scrapes cleaned too, while we’re at it.”

You followed him to his corner of the Lair, and almost immediately a hissed argument started in the main room. You raised a brow at the tallest turtle, surprised, but he only grimaced, closed the door to block the sound before dropping into a low stool and nudging you towards his chair.

“Just ignore it, it’s been going on for a couple days now.” That was more worrying than the actual argument, even though you couldn’t tell whose voices were overlapping each other. The turtles never let anything fester, there was no way for anything to fester, with how much they were in each others’ pockets.

“Why are they fighting?” You asked, watching as Donnie lined up the hydrogen peroxide and the cotton balls before leaning to the far side for a pack of waterproof bandaids.

“Hm… well….” He returned to sitting straight, handing you a little bottle that clattered as he passed it over. “I don’t- listen to most of it. I just tune it out as soon as I figure out it’s happening.” He looked down at your hands, avoiding eye contact, and you realized he was lying.

You took the Tylenol dry, swallowing and wincing before handing the bottle back. You let him doctor your hands, rub his thumb across the mark on your cheek, before you caught his grip in your own and asked once more. “Donnie, why were both Raph and Leo in the Ha’shi?”

He winced, but answered when you squeezed his fingers. “They got caught fighting. Most of the time they’ve kept it out on patrols, but this time Dad heard.”

“Great.” You ran your hands through your hair. “And you’ve got no clue what it’s about?” You had a sneaking suspicion, but you wanted to be wrong.

“Hm… yea.” He looked away again, gave you a sheepish smile when you let out a low noise of disbelief. “Listen, you should- you should talk to Leo.”

“I did talk to him.” You argued, the ground swooping below your feet at the gentle command in Donnie’s tone. “I talked, and he talked, and now… there’s nothing to talk about.”

Donnie stuck the tip of his tongue out, the move reading anxious as he pushed the issue. “Yea. Maybe try again?”

You had wanted to avoid this. You had thought, perhaps a bit foolishly, that they would all feel too awkward over the whole thing to say anything, especially if you stayed away long enough to be able to act as if it hadn’t happened. Or that maybe the blue banded turtle would have ordered them not to stick their snouts into the whole clusterfuck.

No such luck, apparently.

You hung your head, sighing roughly in annoyance. “Dee, I can’t. He was very, very clear on all the reasons why… why my interest was a bad idea. It’s not like I went and did a great job hiding it.” You said the last part roughly, amused and self-deprecating all in one, staring at the undone zippered pocket on Donnie’s leg to avoid his too golden eyes.

“No, no you didn’t.” Donnie agreed, soft and full of remorse as he stood. He turned to clean up so you could scrub your eyes in peace. When he turned back around, he faltered, swayed side to side in indecision before opening his arms up for a hug.

You stood to make it less awkward, met him in the middle and wrapped your arms around him as far as you could. “I’m sorry Donnie. I went and ruined things, didn’t I?”

“No, no you didn’t.” He parroted again, tightening his arms around you. “Just… don’t go avoiding us, kay?”

You hummed in agreement, scrubbing your face against him in affection. “Never gonna do that, Dee.”

“Good.” He released you, quickly pushing his glasses up to rub at his eyes. “In that case, I really should probably start cleaning up the garage.” He glanced at you. “Leo and Raph are probably finishing up their Ha’shi time, but Mikey’s in the living room if you want to go hang out with him? The garage is a little too dangerous right now.”

“I heard it looks like a war zone in there?” You asked cheekily, taking his cues to return to normal, sticking your hands in your pockets and following him out of the Lab.

“My expertise cataloging may have gotten a little away from me.” He admitted, amused, and ruffled your hair in parting when you both reached the mouth of the tunnel that led to the garage.

“Wish me luck.” You quipped after his retreating shell, not really expecting an answer, but he held up a hand with crossed fingers before he disappeared around the bend.

Once you were alone, your shoulders caved, swinging down and forwards. There was a hitch in your left that no doubt would turn into something nasty the longer you went without icing it.

All you’d have to do is ask Mikey, and he’d fix you up with an ice pack. The thought had you sighing, feet turning automatically for the main room and the tv area, the most likely space to find the smallest turtle brother.

You rubbed your shoulder absentmindedly as you went, cupping the roll of muscle and rubbing back and forth with your fingers. The sound of your blouse shifting across your skin brought you up short, and with a whine you realized you’d forgotten about your coat.

“Great. Just…” You turned again, mind not really caught up on where you were going, annoyance bubbling up, when you crossed the closed doors of the dojo and voices inside caught your attention.

“-look like you ate a whole bag of atomic lemons.”

You stopped, head swinging around at the sound of Raph’s low rumble, and the thought that he’d happily help you find your coat had you reaching for the divider’s edge before the next voice had you pulling back sharply.

“I don’t recall ever asking for your opinion.”

Leo, and where Raph sounded cajoling, the blue banded turtle sounded pissed. In fact, you’d never heard him in that low of an octave, that shade of done with whoever was trying to speak with him.

Raph started in again, words precise and slow, and the hair on the back of your neck stood up straight at the obvious way he was picking a fight. “I mean, most expect me to be the one that growls and loses his temper, sounding more like a beast, but I gotta hand it to ya, brother. You sure know how to-”

“Cut the shit and say your piece, Raphael.” Leo interjected, drawing out the syllables of his brother’s name, and you didn’t have to see into the room to hear how close their voices were to each other, how up in each others’ faces they must be.

Silence for a beat, then Raph spoke up, that careful cajole peeling back to show the rough anger underneath. “You don’t understand how lucky you are, Fearless. We’ve all been dreamin of someone that would put up with our ugly mugs, and you go and-”

“Someone? Or her?” Your eyes bugged at the insinuation leveled in the growl, and fought the instinct to scurry to the side, knowing they’d hear.

The was a long silence that you drowned in, heart beating too fast, too loud, certain a fist would fly -

before Raph huffed, voice so cutting you had to concentrate to hear the amusement underneath. “You think I’m after your girl, Leo?” He let out a vicious laugh that sounded anything but humorous. “You better clean up then, cuz she ain’t really looking like your girl from where I’m standin’.”

You were done. You didn’t need to hear whatever Leo said in response. You turned on your heel and promptly walked away, coat forgotten, shoulder no longer aching, mind a one thought tract to find Mikey and bully him into taking you home.

Goddamn turtles and their goddamn snouts sticking into things that shouldn’t be poked.

You found Mikey exactly where you thought he would be, parked in front of the tv with what no doubt was the game your previous call had pulled him away from. When he heard your footsteps, he turned, easy grin disappearing into wide eyes and a silent question, lips pursed at whatever emotion was on your face.

“Hey, Mike, I need-” You pulled up short, spying your coat on the couch next to him. “What- how…?”

“Raph grabbed it when he went looking for your phone.” Mikey answered, pawing at your coat to hold the mentioned device out towards you, big blue eyes glued on the way your face crumpled, confused on why his words would pull that reaction. “Babes?”

It should be so easy. Take me home. Mikey, take me home. He would, especially with how you couldn’t see him for the tears swallowing up your vision. You heard him toss the controller aside, nothing more than a green and orange blur that took up your vision as he clambered to his feet. You didn’t startle when his warm hands clasped your elbows.

“Hey, hey, you’re ok. Babes, don’t cry. Please, don’t cry.” You were scaring him, you knew, and the knowledge was enough for you to rub your eyes roughly, trying to shove everything back in the tightly padlocked little box you’d crushed under heel for a month. A long month of silence…

There was a scuff behind you, a foot sliding across the ground, and it had your shoulders tightening up, the forgotten ache returning with a vengeance along with the reminder that the Lair was the last place you should have a breakdown in.

A hand appeared in the corner of your eye, a towel bundled up in their grip. You didn’t need to follow the arm up to know who it belonged to- the blue toned fabric and vambrace gave him away.

It was rude to leave the proffered towel hanging there. It was rude and it was childish-

You took it from him with a mumbled thanks, certain your voice could cut glass with how sharp the word came out, and you winced reflexively as Leo shifted next to you.

You smoothed out the wrinkled terry cloth, raised your arm up to press the coolness against your shoulder. Your breath sawed out as the cold started to numb the inflamed area.

“Would you like to go lay down?” Leo murmured, and you almost missed the question, too surprised at how soft his voice had gone, not quite a whisper, but definitely closer to how he talked to you before the whole debacle.

It had your face raising up, curiously meeting his gaze despite the ache in your chest the realization caused.

He took you in, head dipping to the side and closer into your space. “C’mon, you can rest for a bit- Raph’s gone to get some pizza.”

You continued to stare at him, eyes tracking between his eyes as if he might explain the complete 180. “Where…” You trailed off, eyes flitting down to his shoulders, his arms, realizing you hadn’t been this close to him for a while. You swallowed, before rising back up to meet him head on once more. “Where am I suppose to rest?”

It was a valid question. Mikey shifted in front of you, and belatedly you realized you had forgotten his presence, caught up in the blue you hadn’t looked at for longer than a few seconds in quite a while.

It’s pathetic. You thought in a flash. A month of ignoring me and all mr. soft eyes has to do is drop one line.

But in the past you’d always rested in the main room, hunkered under some blankets on the couch and giggled while they pulled antics around you. He wasn’t suggesting kicking Mikey out of the shared space, and the couch was right there, so clearly he didn’t mean-

“You can lay down in my room.” Came his answer, eyes slowly moving over you in a gentle perusal that you knew meant he was assessing your mood.

The words settled in you like stones, scraping down your ears as they went, and you went eerily still. Silence followed, and you almost startled to hear the saw of your breath escaping.

Mikey shifted again, not quite leaving your space.

Your eyes narrowed, lips compressed, but you dropped your gaze in favor of palming the towel and muttering your answer to your feet. “Thanks, but no thanks, think I’ll chill with Mike til Raph gets back.”

Leo sighed through closed lips, and the sound had your hackles raising.

“You’re exhausted, and you’re hurt. Just come lay-” His hand reached out, nudged you gently.

In his defense, you didn’t realize you’d react the way you did to the slight touch either, but you all but jerked away from him, taking two steps to the side before swinging around to glare back. “I said no, Leo!” -

Or at least, that’s what you meant to say, but somewhere between your brain and your mouth, your throat changed the words into something else, something meaner.

“You told me no, Leo! You don’t get to tug me around like… like this!”

Leo blinked once, long and slow like he was processing, and you couldn’t care less where Mikey’d gone, eyes locked on your target as you waited for the return volley.

Eventually, his head tilted, and you saw the exact moment he chose the high road, and it made you see red.

“You’ve been through a lot tonight, It’s not me you want to pick a fight with.” He tried to soothe, taking a step closer, swaying towards you. “We can talk after you rest, but I really think you should-”

“Listen?” The word was out before you could catch it, and Leo drew up short like a puppet on strings, his head rearing back. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Mikey slinking backwards, away, but you barreled onwards. “Just sit and listen as you tell me what to do? What’s good for me?” You snorted, so loudly it hurt, and watched Leo’s mouth compress into a tight line at the noise.

“It doesn’t really matter if you listen to me or not, does it?” He lobbed back, and you reeled, expecting the next line like it’d already left his mouth. “You’ll still wind up in trouble, wouldn’t you?”

It’s too dangerous. For you. It’s nothing but trouble, believe me, I don’t want to place you in danger.

Self-sacrificing. The words whispered in your head then, they pissed you off now. You scoffed at him, waving a hand as though to brush off the memory.

“Yea, whatever, I’m not putting up with this.” You told him, shoes clacking against the ground as you skirted him and went for the tunnel that led to the garage. You weren’t quite sure if you were walking home, but you were angry enough that if no one stopped you by the time you got to the hidden door, you would certainly try.

Leo’s arm snagged out, and you danced backwards, out of reach, teeth gritting because you know he let you. He could have easily grabbed you, hell it used to be a game to see how long you could keep away from his hold-

“This isn’t the time for this conversation.” Leo whispered, breaking into your thoughts, taking another step towards you. His eyes rolled skyward when you matched him with a step back. “Please, just- at least let’s go someplace where we have privacy.” He hissed the last word, and it didn’t take a genius to figure out he was referring to the orange banded blue eyeballs peeking out from behind the couch.

“We already had this conversation.” You reminded him, ten shades of done and tired. The whispered argument from before popped in your head, and before you could corral the words you stuck your whole foot in your mouth. “You think just because you had an- an epiphany, I’ll fall in line?” You snorted again, knowing the sound drove him crazy. “Good luck with that.”

The line had him pausing, brow furrowing as confusion cut through his anger, and you took advantage, all but hopping around him and belting for the tunnel that would lead you out, scooping up your coat and phone and trading the ice pack in their place in one smooth move along the way.

It might have been years of knowing them. It might have been sixth sense. It certainly wasn’t your hearing, he moved as silent as ever, but you twirled on instinct, incensed to find him a step behind you.

Leo pulled back on those invisible strings once more when you all but snapped your teeth at him.

“You better let me have my space, Leo.” You took a step towards him without thinking, and this time it was him who took a half step back. “Back off.”

It was laughable, the thought that you could do anything to him if he pushed into your bubble once more, but that growl started up low in his chest, and you watched as his pupils blew wide, the dark eating up the normally brilliant blue until they were nothing more than light colored rings.

“Back off?” He repeated, growl slurring his words, and you locked your knees as his head swung into your space, shoulders rounding towards you. “But that’s not what you want, is it, princess?”

Ooooo…. That was- that was Raph’s nickname for you, and you stuttered, wondering if that was Leo’s subtle way of letting you know he knew exactly how much shit you were blowing out your ass.

You met him tic for tac, a hairs-breath from his face, blowing purposefully up his nose just to hear that growl hitch up to a higher register. “I told you want I wanted, Blue. You don’t get to throw a fit after you’ve already told me your verdict.”

You wondered if he’d break. You kind of wanted him to, to really yell, to give you some insight to his thoughts beyond what he allowed to filter through the mask. Your heart a fast staccato that almost drowned out whatever growl he was throwing out at your defiance.

He dipped his head to peer down his snout at you, and you weren’t sure what had you more pissed, the way he tried to reel himself in or the words he used. “I am trying to talk to you- if you would just calm down-”

“Oh, I think it’s you who needs to calm down, Leo.” You went to turn, dismissive and all at once feeling the hurt, and his hand snapped out. You thought maybe he was aiming for your arm and misjudged the angle, because instead his fist locked around the fabric of your blouse low on your hip.

“I can’t- be what you want!” He hissed at you, venomous, and you reeled, leaning back, the fabric of your blouse taunt in his fist. “I don’t know how to be human, act human!” He pulled you towards him too roughly, and your shoes squeaked against the polished cement floor. “This is what you’d get, what you’re so- so stupidly foolish to ask for-”

“Leonardo.” Splinter didn’t snap, but he might as well as bellowed at his eldest son. Leo sure acted like he did, hand snapping back fast enough that you almost slipped and fell before he corrected and caught your elbow, touch hauling you straight before it was gone just as quickly.

You refused to look up, conscious that you’d had an audience for the whole fight and it’d done nothing but spur you onwards. Mikey was still perched behind the couch, trying and failing to act like he wasn’t watching a drama. Splinter was at the top of the little stairs that led to his bedroom, cane perched between his two paws, ears swiveled to the side as if he was listening to something else.

Leo was stiff next to you, eyes on the floor, posture polite and hands tightly fisted to his sides. You couldn’t look at him head on, didn’t like the carefully blank face he was presenting.

You blew out a breath, hand pressing to your head for a beat as your headache started back up. “Sorry, Splinter. I got carried away.” Part of you wanted to throw Leo under the bus as well, but you knew he’d likely get his own version of a private talk once you were gone. “I’m just- just gonna go home.” You paused intentionally, then dipped into the bow you had seen Leo make to his sensei over the years. “I apologize.”

“You are always welcome here.” Splinter said softly, as if you weren’t just engaged in a shouting match with his honor child in the living room in front of god and sundry. “But for an old rat’s sake, please allow one of my sons to take you home, if that is what you wish.”

You side eyed Leo, hoping Splinter wasn’t suggesting what you thought he was suggesting.

Then Raph stepped out of the tunnel, pizza boxes stacked in his hands, wide green eyes trailing over Leo, before his gaze flicked to you and you cringed.

Knowing he had seen you lose your cool over Leo was somehow worse than Mikey seeing it, but then again, it was Raph that first weaseled your crush out of you months ago.

Raph arched a brow, tilted his head, then turned to Splinter. “I can take her home, Sensei.”

Splinter nodded. “Good, good.” He gestured at you with one paw. “Let Raphael take you home. Please.”

“Of course,” You said, bopping into a small bow again, and relaxing when Splinter turned his attention to his eldest.

“Leonardo, please, come speak with me.”

“Hai, Sensei.” He answered dutifully, face still carefully blank. He swayed forward like a pendulum, before he caught himself with a near silent scuff of his foot against the ground, and followed his father without a backwards glance.

Raph waited until the two had disappeared into the little room before he looked at you and whistled long and low between his teeth.

“God, just, shut up.” You told him, angry all over again, jamming your arms into your coat and belting for the exit.

Raph chuckled, set the pizzas down on that table, and followed you back out, haphazardly calling to Mikey over his shoulder, “only one of those is yours, numb nuts!”

#tmnt bayverse #tmnt bayverse fanfiction #tmnt bayverse fanfic #bayverse leonardo #bayverse leo #bayverse leonardo x reader #bayverse leo x reader #bayverse raphael #bayverse michelangelo #bayverse donatello

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luvyeni · 1 year

Note

omfg please more perv!chan 🙏 🙏 🙏 🙏, also I shall introduce myself, aj anon, how you've just so quickly become one of my fav writers.

welcome aj anon im glad you like my work <3 since i did perv!felix x 9th member, i'll do perv!chan x 9th member cause it's my favorite to talk about ☝🏽

this ask is what im talking about...

imagine him begging you to be on his live , you agree because you've never never been on his live , you were excited , but chan was even more excited but for other reasons.

"today, we have a guest." you smile , waving to the camera , and for the firsr half it's fun , your joking, listening to music and talking to stays , all of a sudden he puts his hand on thigh.

you don't mind , because it's something he always does , but his hand just keeps getting higher and higher as he continues to talk to stays with that charming smile.

you closed your thighs around his hand , but he pushes them open, turning to you for a second facing where stays can't see, "be a good girl , keep your legs spread."

answering a few more questions his hand finally reach where he wanted , tapping your clothed clit , you whine , hiding your face in your hand. "she's been having headaches for a few days, right." you nodded. "y..yeah im fine, i'll just get some rest when i get home."

he leaned over , smiling whispering in your ear. "such a naughty girl , letting me touch you like this in front of stay." he rubbed harsher circles and you bit the inside of your cheek.

"think you could be quiet for me if i fingered you until you made a mess on my fingers"

#luvyeni: skz hard thoughts #skz hard thoughts #skz hard hours #skz scenarios #skz headcanons #skz smut #stray kids imagines #stray kids hard thoughts #stray kids hard hours #stray kids headcanons #stray kids smut #stray kids scenarios #bang chan headcanons #bang chan imagines #bang chan scenarios #bang chan x reader #bang chan smut #bang chan hard thoughts #bang chan hard hours

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ccraccz · 6 months

Note

Hiya! I saw your Heartsteel requests were open so I wanted to ask for headcanons of the Heartsteel boys with Fem!Reader who’s very sleepy. I mean like, constant naps during the day or sometimes they doze off and become forgetful. And maybe they’re a night owl so they’re constantly up gaming all night!

Night owl attraction

Characters: aphelios, ezreal, sett, kayn, k'sante, yone x Fem Reader

(Implide sauce)

Context: you're a night owl, sleeping here, napping there, but at night, when the sun is down, you live laugh love.

Aphelios

He's with you on this

Aphelios does most of his work at night time and usually takes naps throughout the day.

That was before becoming part of the band, where everyone is usually awake in the day time

So his sleep schedule is kinda (very) messed up.

But knowing you're also a night owl makes his life all the much more easier!

You will always be his excuse.

Naps on his bed? He's ready in the dark, arms wide open, in bed.

You forgot something at your place but are too tired to get it?

He's gone out to get it, don't fall asleep yet though

He'll join you soon!

At night time is were everything goes party rockin

You have your own little space.for gaming in his room you're that important!

He makes his music, has you listen to it and add some input, you play your games, and do you work

Easy as that!

Though, sometimes, he just wants to sleep with you when you have so much energy at night time

Especially on days the band has to go to events

He really wants to stay up with you but he really can't 😕

So most of the time you get your mobile games and play while he's laying on your chest

Or he'll get you tired in another way 😏

Ezreal

He would totally nap with you

But be quite sad that you're always napping when he has the most energy

He really loves to go on dates throughout the day and you always napping always makes him hold off on that

Poor beby

You both are total opposites

During the day he's energetic, you're sleepy

During the night time, your energetic, he's sleepy

Ince he tried sleeping through out the day and staying up at night

He'll never do that again

It gave him a giant headache since he wasn't used to doing that

So he learned that he should tell you the plans beforehand and write them down on a calendar beside the sink in your bathroom because he knows you'll forget

And he'll remind you every 1 hour

He doesn't mind that you nap and are forgetful because of that, but he's slightly peeved by it

He loves you too much to tell you that though

Though if he's incredibly tired at night and all he wants is to hug and sleep with you in his arms

He'll definitely do everything he can to get you tired

Even if it's slightly messy.

Sett

He would totally try to encourage you to wake up early and start your day

He doesn't understand why you're so active at night??

Like??? Huh???

He'd definitely ask you why you sleep so much during the day

Poor beby wants to know how to accommodate you and your likes and dislikes

If you want to wake up but just have trouble, so you just don't

Every day, he'll encourage you to get up with kisses and hugs and breakfast and more!

It'll be difficult at first but he understands, and he'll carry your around if you fall asleep anywhere.

If you don't want to fix it, like ezreal, sett would be a bit peeved but wouldn't do much about it

He lives you for who you are, but it's kinda difficult, literally being an early riser and a night owl couple

He totally understands after you ex0lain it to him but I think he'd feel left out when you're alway in bed and hes.always doing something else

Same thing your way, at night time he's always asleep, alone without you, and you're always gaming or working

He'd try his best and would definitely carry you around when you fall asleep somewhere though!!

Kayn

He'd be a total menace

Waking you up everytime you fall asleep because 'if he can't be asleep l, then you can't either!'

His words

You better have a good reason as to why you're still awake at 3 in the morning-

Oh, work? Understandable, get in bed as soon as possible though, tomorrow you have a date to go to and he wants you awake and alive during it!

Rhaast would totally try to control and wake you up in the most inhumane ways

Like throwing you into a full bathtub

But kayn is still a sweetheart so he won't let him do that.

Sometimes, all he wants to do is lay on your tits and fall asleep

But most of the time, you're working or playing games, and it's so annoying to him

So he tries to keep you awake at all times and have you sleep with him, which usually works!

Other times, he lets you sleep here and there because he knows you're trying your best, but it's just so difficult

And, uncommonly, he'll sleep with you during the day and night if you know what I mean 😏😏😏

K'sante

He's a bit like Sett

Not an early riser but doesn't send his day in bed like you

When he first notices, he asks you about it thinking something is wrong

If you want to work on it, he'll definitely help out

Waking up early, early jogs, cold showers

All along with morning kisses and hugs

He'd, at first, would feel so guilty about waking you, but it's for a good cause

If not, he'd be kinda annoyed by it, but would understand that you've been dealing with this for a while, so you're definitely used to it, and change is quite difficult

At night time, when you're most active, he tries to give as much affection and love before he goes to sleep

Most of the tikenthat means you taking action in bed but whateves

He loves you so much but wishes he'd be able to interact with you more throughout the day without disturbing your precious sleep

And sleeping without you just isn't the same as the naps you both take after lunch

It's just so lonely and wonky he doesn't like it at all

Give k'sante more love, I beg!!!

Yone

(Like alune, there's literally no gifs for yone and that makes me sad)

He'd definitely be more disturbed by it but would understand.

He'd have a calendar every corner lmao

I front of the bathroom mirror so you see it behind your reflection, on the fridge, in your closet, anywhere!

He loves you so much but it's hard to live someone whose always napping

He'd wake you up in the most gentle ways

Kisses.on the forehead, cheek, pouty lips

Fixing your hair, gliding his fingertips over your face as he admires you

Calling out your name in gentle whispers and chuckling when you whine because you don't want to wake up

He thinks you're so cute and gets used to waking you up every now and then.

He's a total insomniac, though, so he's sometimes awake with you, working on songs when he doesn't take his meds.

And he usually only falls asleep with you in his arms so it's a but more difficult to sleep when you're awake.

So someday, when he doesn't want to work, he ask you to have fun with him instead 🤭

-------------------------------------

Note!

Augh YOUR BRAIN IS SO BIG I LOVED THIS REQUEST SO SWEET!!! Thank you so so much for requesting!!! 💙💙💙💙 BTW it was kinda difficult to show that this was a fem reader because I want to include as many body types as I can, so I didn't describe the body ad much as I would have if I had a specific body type so, IM SORRY BOUT THAT 💙💙💙.

#heartsteel ezreal #heartsteel kayn #heartsteel yone #heartsteel sett #heartsteel #heartsteel k'sante #heartsteel yone x fem reader #heartsteel ezreal x fem reader #heartsteel kayn x fem reader #heartsteel aphelios x fem reader #heartsteel sett x fem reader #heartsteel K'sante x fem reader #heartsteel x fem reader

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dearshelby · 1 year

Text

Blessed domesticity | T.S

Summary: Tommy has way too many hard days, but luckily he can always return home to sweet baked goods and warm cups of tea.

A/N: I'd like to gift @thomashelbyswhore this little drabble because since this post crossed my timeline I can't stop thinking of lil domestic tommy and his sweet tooth, you gave me inspiration and I simply had to write about it! I hope you like it <3

The first thing Tommy saw when he got to his home's door was a cat lazily lying in front of it. The feline barely moved to his approach and he fought the urge of throwing the animal out of the way.

Not that he had something against cats, he knew they only surrounded the house because his wife fed them and she surely would be upset if he shooed them away. However, today had been a tough day and Tommy wasn't exactly in the mood to walk over something to enter his own home.

Still, with a frustrated sigh, he allowed the cat to rest on his front door. Entering the living room, he removed his cap and overcoat, the scowl in his face slightly softened as he breathed in the delicious smell of a cake in the oven.

But besides the aroma, he heard classical music coming from the kitchen and quickly followed after, the loud volume mixed with the shouts from the betting shop gave him a headache.

Tommy made his presence known by lifting the disco stick and quitting the melody. Turning to him, his wife muttered a greeting and continued to decorate the cake on the balcony.

He kissed the back of her head before trying to take some of the cake's topping, but she quickly (and gently) hit his hand with a wooden spoon.

"This is for Katie's birthday," she kissed his cheek, "yours is in the oven,"

"Hm," he acknowledged.

She peeked at him through the side of her eye while he took a glass and a whiskey bottle, "If you wait until I'm done I'll make you some tea,"

Clumsily, Tommy switched in between returning the bottle to the shelf or pouring some into the glass and in the end, he decided to wait until she finished.

Sitting at the kitchen's table, he lit up a cigarette, blowing the smoke in the air with a tense brown.

He stared at the knot of her apron, perfectly sat at the curve of her lower back, he wanted to untie it, lift her skirt and have her right there. He would later, after he had a slice of cake and calmed down a bit.

"Do you wanna tell me what's troubling you?" she asked.

"Just-" he huffed, "the usual, fucking business,"

"The guns? Ada? Kimber?"

"Yeah, all of that,"

Dropping the spoon on the sink, she walked near him, cupped his jaw and gently caressed his cheek, "Things will fall back on the tracks eventually, love, don't stress too much about it,"

Tommy could argue he had many reasons to worry or that just not stressing wasn't so simple. Instead, he wrapped his arms around her waist and rested his head on her stomach.

"Y/n," he called.

"Hm?"

"How long will it take until my cake is ready?"

MASTERLIST

#tommy shelby x reader #peaky blinder imagine #peaky blinder fanfic #peaky blinders moodboard

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cissywritess · 1 year

Text

𝑪𝒂𝒕𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒉𝒆 | Two

Summary: You’re in your last year of high school, you want out of this town. It won’t be so easy when you got a stalker.

Pairing: Dark!Stucky x reader

Warnings: 18+, Contains Dark themes, please no not read of you are sensitive. Please read warnings before reading any 18+ posts.

Notes: damm, unedited.

・❥・

You did your usual routine in the morning, using the toilet, brushing your teeth, and changing clothes. As you were tying your shoes you hear the doorbell ring, and you quickly go downstairs.

You didn’t expect there to be a cop when you opened the door, “Good morning ma’am, Are you Y/N,” he said. You furrow your eyebrows confused about why there was a cop looking for you.

“Yeah I’m Y/N, is there a problem officer?” You asked,

“We were informed that you saw Amelia Sawyer two days ago, I don’t know if you have heard but she’s missing,” he explained leaving you with wide eyes. You were shocked, I mean you guys weren’t as close as you were before but she was still your friend.

“Um- yeah I’ve seen her at the diner I work at, it’s 10 miles south. I’m sorry but when did she go missing,” you were curious.

“Apparently you and a group of friends were the last to see her,” he wrote down on his notepad. “Thank you for your time have a nice day,” he smiles and left. You closed the door still processing, there was no reason why she would run away or leave. You just hoped nothing bad has happened to her.

Half of the day was spent at school, Amelia’s friends and peers were talking about the possibilities that probably happen to her. They were also talking about doing a search party. Everyone was freaked out by Amelia going missing because it wasn’t her there was no reason why she would winningly leave. You didn’t consider going to the search party since no one knew you. And they’d probably give you funny looks as they did at the diner.

You were having a big headache at school and once you got home you knocked out on your bed. When you woke up you were surprised that you’re mom was there, she was in the living room having a glass of wine. Like always.

“Hey sweetie, I thought you worked today?” She seemed to have her attention on the tv and her phone.

“Today's my day off,” you go into the kitchen opening the fridge, “did you hear Amelia went missing,” you told her

“Isn’t she friends with you? Girls run away all the time I’m sure she’ll turn up soon,” she changed the channel to the tv. You ignore her, she’s in her own world.

You were preparing a sandwich, the only thing you ate all day, besides an apple for breakfast, you had a poor diet, you knew that but you didn’t have any time to really fit 3 meals in a day

You go upstairs to your room. Switching your laptop on, still no acceptance letters. You decided to watch a movie. You ate your sandwich and watched a family film. Halfway through you got a notification from them, your heart quickens as you hesitantly clicked on it. You have never been so scared in your life before, goosebumps were everywhere on your skin.

I wonder what happened to that fake bitch Amelia, maybe when she got home someone was waiting for her and you know, maybe that’s why she’s missing.

You were scared, your fingers loomed over the keys and started typing,

Did you do something to her?

At this point you were shaking, maybe it was a joke someone who was playing a prank on you, just because they have nothing else to do. You thought of many excuses for why they would say this, the three dots popped up making you more nervous.

Why don't you see for yourself?

A picture was sent, you thought for a second wondering what you would see, as you clicked on the photo. It was a picture of Amelia, she was naked her arms behind her back, and tied with her feet she had some type of cloth in her mouth. You quickly closed your computer and stood up horrified. Do you call the police? Just as you finished that thought you get a message, this time on your phone the contact name said Amelia and your heart dropped.

Don't try anything funny baby, is that your slut of a mother on the couch? Don't want another picture, do you?

This time you started crying, freaked out by what was going on. You got another text message from the same person

Calm down, and carry on with your day, I'll see you tomorrow.

Your body was shaking, you went downstairs and made sure all the doors and windows were locked. Your mom didn't acknowledge you as you locked the front door. You shut the curtains in your room and turned the lights off.

・❥・

The whole day was you worrying, at first you thought maybe it was someone from school but there wasn't anything out of place there. Your shift was the same, worrying. Almost at the end of the shift, the door rings, it was Steve and Bucky, they flashed a smile and sat at a booth, you went up to them,

"The usual, both of us," Steve said, you nodded and wrote it down.

"I do have to let you know that the diner closes in 20 minutes," You told him. He nodded, you went behind the diner placing his order in. You cleaned up the tables, Steve and Bucky were the last customers left. You place their food in front of them and as you were about to leave a hand grabbed your wrist.

"I missed you, baby," Bucky smiled at you. Your heart stopped, the same name your stalker called you.

"Y/N you can leave early I'll close up today," your coworker said snatching your attention, Bucky let go of your wrist and you quickly left to the back room.

You grabbed your stuff and headed for the bus stop, the last bus to come is your only ride home. You did not feel safe at all, looking around once in a while. Maybe he was just being nice, but the long pause before he called you that name left shivers down your spine. You pulled out your phone pretending to do something to keep you distracted.

"Need a ride sweetheart?" You jump, it was Steve, you didn't see Bucky anywhere.

"Um n-no thank you," you look down at your phone, Steve stepped closer to you making you feel uneasy.

"Bucky didn't mean to scare you off," He started as he licked his lips. "He was trying to be nice,"

"He didn't" You shook your head, the bus should have been here by now. The more you stayed here with him the more you felt like he wasn't a safe person to be around with.

"Really?" big arms wrapped around you holding you tightly. You were about to scream out for help, but Steve quickly cover your mouth. "Then why could I hear your heart pounding?" Bucky spoke in your ear.

You cried from being frightened, "sh sh sh, we'll be home soon," Steve shushed you. He removed his hand, before you could scream a cloth covered your mouth making you feel dizzy, you tried not to breathe it in but you were too out of breath. Soon enough you saw dark spots clouding your vision.

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heartsfourdazai · 6 months

Note

Hello, may I please request scenarios of Ranpo, Chuuya and Dazai caring for a fem!reader who constantly has headaches?

taking care of a female s/o who has headaches

ranpo, chuuya, and dazai<3

warnings: lowrcase writing

a/n: tried a new style!! idk if i'll keep, or change this one!! thank you for the request anon<3

RANPO EDOGAWA 🔎

"do you have a fever?"

"no.."

"are you sure?"

you grumbled, piling up all your finished paperwork handed down to you. ranpo cocked his head to the side upon hearing your grumbles.

"i'm just...stressed..."

oh, he already knew.

the moment you walked through the doors of the agency. the bright lights of the building caused you to sink into your jacket, however the moment you took it off, you had tp cover your eyes with the sleeve of your dress shirt.

ranpo watched you pull the chair from your desk and sit, your head resting against your arms.

it was quiet until he spoke, "pretty sure kunikida has some advil somewhere around his desk, you know him. always perpaired for anything."

your boyfriend started to rumage through kunikida's desk. luckily the perfeconist wasn't here to scold him, however he will 100% notice someone has looked through his belongings.

eh, he'll just go off on dazai.

"ranpo- no- don't take kunikida's stuff- that's rude. especially if he doesn't-" "found it!"

you frowned, giving up with trying to reason with your childish boyfriend.

with a hop, and a skip he stood in front of you, digging out a pill and held it in the palm of his hand in front of you.

"take it!"

you stared at the pill,

"with what water?"

ranpo's eyebrow furrowed, looking around your desk then by your purse at your feet. he dug through it, much to your liking, and whipped out a bottle of water and placed it and the pill in front of you.

you take the pill, rubbing your head after you did. ranpo pats your head, "rest. no one should be coming into this room, unless they need papers or folders, it should be pretty quiet."

"what about you?"

he shrugged, "i'll stay here. i go nothing better to do anyway, i'm bored. hand me your phone."

you too tired to defend, so you handed your phone to your boyfriend laid your head on your arms.

ranpo just chilled at the desk beside your own, and just played minecraft on your phone waiting for you to wake up.

he'll take proper care of you when you both get home<3

CHUUYA NAKAHARA 🍷

"babe, take the advil.." he wasn't done with you, however he as growing quite tired of your childsish behavoir. you've had a fever for three days now, and you have not been getting any better then you told him you'd be.

he would be at work whilst your home sick in bed, lying to him you've been getting better the more you sleep. "it hurts to swallow!" you complained, gently slapping his hand away.

"it will help you!" he reasoned, however you were still stubborn. hiding under the covers of your shared bed and heard chuuya sigh. the wight in the bed changed from heavy to light as you felt him step off.

"where are you-"

"you obviously don't want my help. so i'm going to go out and get dinner. you still need to eat something, or else you'll never get better. feel free to take whatever medience you want, just don't overdose too many.." he whispered the last part, grabbing his coat and left the bedroom.

you were still facing the window of your room. it suddenly got so quiet, the only sound you could hear was the ceiling fan and your short breathing.

your headaches haven't gone away in the past hour your boyfriend has left to get dinner. must've been a busy night wherever he was going.

you've fallen asleep a couple of times, squriming in your bed because of your aching head. finally, you sat up from the covers and stepped gently out of bed and toward the bathroom.

in there, you took out a bottle of advil and poured one pill out and into the palm of your hand. with the cup of already clean water in it, thanks chuuya, and swallowed it.

your face cringed as you swallowed the pill and wiped your mouth with your sleeve PJ top. you slipped back into bed walking out of the bathroom and into your bedroom and once your head laid on the pillow, you fell alseep.

an hour later, the door to your bedrioom opened. "babe, i'm home. sorry i'm-" the ginger immdeiatly stopped on his words seeing your sleeping figure on the bed. the covers were around you and you looked like a cacoon.

he sighed happily, walking into the bathroom and noticed the advil bottle opened.

walking out, he kissed your temple gently and left the room, leaving you to your peaceful slumber.

OSAMU DAZAI 🩹

"daaazai..." you whined out, leaning on the mountain of pillows that had surrounded you on the couch of your shared apartment with dazai. your boyfriend for 1 year.

"yes, my sweet belladonna?~"

his voice. god it made you melt. was heard through the bathroom you two also shared in your small, but cozy, apartment.

"another!" you coughed, rubbing your temples as you turned down the volume on the television.

dazai walked out if the bathroom with a hot wet towel in his hands.

"already? this is the forth time you asked me this hour!" he exclaimed playfully, sitting down with you and motioned you to lean your head on his lap.

with no question you laid your head on his thighs and whined. "i know, but it feels good when you do it..." he whispered, closing your eyes.

with a hum, he started t gently comb his fingers gently through your hair after moving your bangs to place the wet towel on your forehead.

"are you feeling any better?"

dazai asked in a hushed voice after a couple of minutes of just silently stroking your hair.

you hummed in response, curling deeper into yourself and attempted to over the fuzzy blanket over you. you smiled warmly feeling dazai aid you and flop the blanket over you like a child.

he leaned down as kissed your temple, taking out his book and started to read before stating, "get well soon, bella~ i'll be here with you until you do."

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fayes-fics · 1 year

Text

Succour

Double Bind Masterpost PREV | NEXT

Pairing: Benedict Bridgerton x fem!reader, Anthony Bridgerton x fem!reader

Summary: Follow on to Reprimand. Benedict soothes your pain and Anthony makes a bold choice.

Warnings: 18+ smut, minors DNI, oral sex (m to f), vaginal sex, massage, aftercare. Affection, emotions, confessions and proposals. Mildly angsty maybe (?)

Word Count: 5.7 k

Authors Note: Last planned fic in this series. Thank you to @colettebronte for betaing. Requested by and dedicated to @eleanor-bradstreet, who framed most of the last three fics in this series. I errr hope everyone likes this. Enjoy(?) <3

The next evening you steal away to Benedict’s lodging under cover of darkness, paying your footman some pin money to take you there in a carriage after dinner.

You managed to avoid your family for the day, hiding in your room and claiming you had a headache as a way to disguise your discomfort. Anthony’s harsh treatment, which at the time felt like penance, absolution, even, now feels tender. Blooms on your skin that you can hide from everyone… except the man you have arranged to see tonight. You consider not going through with the plan to meet until you are healed, but you can’t resist him any more than you can his older brother.

You hide behind a large velvet hooded cloak as you step down from the carriage and bustle to the door already opening before you get to it. It’s not the valet that greets you, as you expect, but the man himself.

“Y/n,” Benedict greets and, glancing around the deserted street, closes the door. You both know no one comes for art instruction after 10 pm; if you are seen, there will be talk.

“He knows Benedict!” you lament the instant the door closes, removing your heavy cloak. “Anthony. He called at my house while I was here two days ago; he knows we were together. Oh god. I have no idea what to do!!!”

All day you had managed to keep a lid on your simmering anxiety about what transpired with Anthony, primarily through denial. But seeing his brother, it all comes tumbling out of you.

“Shhh, shhh,” he soothes and places his hands on your shoulders as if considering taking you into an embrace but deciding against it. “All will be well. He only knows that you were here, not what we got up to,” he tries to reason.

“Benedict, you left teeth marks on my inner thigh!” you bemoan. “He's not stupid. I tried to claim it was something else, but, dear god, your brother is not that obtuse… I honestly don't know what he will do,” you fret. “He looked so hurt and sent me away last night.”

“He has no claim of exclusivity over you,” Benedict points out, very much wanting that to be true as much as it may be objectively questionable.

“He told me, in no uncertain terms, that he thought it was clear he is the only one I should be with.”

“And has he made similar promises to you? Because if not, that feels distinctly unfair. For all you know, he could be with another.”

You pause for a moment. Benedict is right. Anthony made no such claim of devotion, merely that you should only be with him, not that he should only be with you also.

“He did not,” you admit.

Benedict curls the arms on your shoulders and draws you into his embrace. His scent, the one that makes your mouth water, surrounds you as your cheek is crushed onto his breastbone. Instead of just arousing, tonight it is also comforting. Safe. You band your arms around his waist and take a deep breath, burrowing into him—taking refuge.

“My girl. I cannot speak for him, but I would devote myself to you wholly. I would never be with another as long as you give me the word that is what you desire,” the words vibrate against your jaw as they rumble in his chest.

You know that Benedict is trying to twist the situation to his advantage, but nonetheless, you believe him and appreciate the honesty behind his words. It’s just not something you want to contemplate tonight.

“Do not, Benedict,” you warn. “Please. I cannot think of the future right now,” you pull back and look pleadingly into his eyes. “I just wish to live for the now, for tonight. I need touch, kisses….” you trail off in a whisper.

He nods in understanding and wordlessly takes your hand, pulling you into his drawing room, where the heavy velvet drapes are already helpfully closed, and a fire is roaring. It feels like a place of comfort.

But when the arm he wraps around your waist makes you wince, a cloud of concern flits over his face.

“What did he do to you?”

“He reprimanded me,” you answer simply. “And I let him. I wanted it. I needed it.”

Benedict shoots you a sorrowful look.

“I do not want your pity Benedict,” you state fiercely, “I choose this.”

“But, my darling girl, there’s a difference between punishment and pain. You appear to be in pain, and it hurts me to see you hurting. Come here,” he pulls you into his arms in a loose embrace, surprisingly sweet. “Let me soothe you,” he murmurs into your hair, placing a kiss on your forehead.

This is not the commanding Benedict he was the last time you met; his tone and touch are gentle. He backs you towards the fireplace, where you feel the warmth from the crackling flames.

It’s there that he undresses you. He doesn’t tell you to strip. He doesn’t tear your dress off. No, he stands behind you, delicate fingers brushing your spine as he slowly unbuttons between your shoulder blades: just slow breathing and the hiss and pops of sap boiling in those wooden logs. Your dress hits the floor, and he reaches around in front wordlessly to loosen the strings of your chemise until it gapes enough to slip over your shoulders. The second it joins your dress around your ankles, he sucks in a breath.

“Oh, my darling girl, what did he do to you?” He sounds almost tremulous as there are gossamer caresses over the marks where the rope tied you around the waist onto the bench and the flecks on your skin from the riding crop.

“I chose it, Benedict,” you remind, your jaw set defiantly, looking at the flames in the hearth.

“I know you did,” he placates, dropping a featherlight kiss onto your shoulder that makes your heart skip, “but you shouldn’t choose physical pain to alleviate your guilt. Especially not for me,” he adds.

Your eyes raise and dart to him. “That’s not….” Your words of protest die out, trapped by his hazy blue stare, heavy with something unspoken.

He’s right.

You chose to let yourself be punished more harshly than ever because of how bad you feel for being torn between these two men—these two incredible but so different brothers.

Those gentle hands are at your stays, unwinding the lace through each hole. Intentionally slow, calming, letting you breathe and sigh and relax into the moment. Then when you sway backwards into him, he instantly pauses, and his lips land warm on your neck, sucking so attentively you moan, just soft heat and dampness. No force, no bite, just lucious sensation.

Your hand shoots back into his hair, scraping your nails over his scalp, revelling in the shiver you feel running through his body. You want to give him an indulgent sensual experience too. Your moan is gauzy as your eyes flutter shut, and you tilt your head, pushing your neck up into his mouth for more. He indulges it, warm wet lips kissing your pulse point, taking you to an almost trance-like state, pliant in his arms.

“Darling, darling girl,” he whispers, then purses his lips and blows warm air over your skin, damp with his saliva, and you shiver from the tenderness.

So slowly you barely feel it, he peels away your stays until you are topless.

“Lay down,” he exhales, gesturing to a pile of oversized pillows gathered on the rug in front of the fireplace.

You sink onto them, their warmth from the fire and plush stuffing a wondrous place to be. You sigh deeply and look up at him as he gazes down at you. His eyes covetously roam your breasts.

“Roll over onto your front,” he asks quietly, and you do so, confused why he might want that. He drops to his knees and covers your body with his. You moan lightly as he drops a kiss on the inside of your left arm. He moves and does the same to your right arm. It’s then you realise he is kissing the spots where you have marks.

Gently, his wet lips trace down over your shoulder to your mid back catching each mark there. You sigh, feeling yourself grow almost drowsy with the heat of the fire and his delicate damp lips. He shuffles lower and spends time mapping the line where the rope lashed you down. Bussing the abrasions softly, your eyes flutter closed, resting your cheek on your joined hands as he salves your skin.

Time slows when he starts unlooping the tiny buttons at your hip for your silk underwear, carefully pulling the material over the swell of your bottom and slipping it down your legs. Hence, you are entirely naked save your stockings, held by ribbons tied just above your knees.

His name is a breathy sigh on your lips as his open mouth traces warm and wet over your bottom, damply kissing each mark. His tongue lathing gently, swirling motions designed to soothe. Moving down further to the back of your thighs, you start to quiver a little. Wondering if he will push your legs open and drink from your body the way you are desperate for him to do. He spends time kissing the sensitive spots on your inner thighs, his breathing a little ragged, and you know he can smell and see your arousal, your legs open as they are. But he does not touch you there. He crawls back up over your prone body, his voice suddenly right by your ear.

“Does that help, my sweet girl?” he inquires sotto voce, and you nod, floating on a cloud of lush sensation—his saliva drying in patches, evaporating in the warm room. “I want to make you feel so much better,” he intones the genial sincerity so beguiling.

“You have,” you assure, twisting to give him a gentle smile.

“Wait here, do not move an inch,” he advises, dropping a kiss on your temple before standing up and walking out of the room briskly.

You are momentarily confused but too drowsy to be concerned, just closing your eyes and enjoying the warmth and crackle of the fire next to you and the comfort and slight velvet tickle of the cushions under you. You hear him re-enter the room but just ghost a smile without reopening your eyes. He chuckles warmly, and you feel a dip in the cushions as he rejoins you.

“I would like to relieve your ache with a massage, my darling girl.”

“I've never had a massage before,” you answer honestly.

“I will pour oil on your skin and rub my hands over you,” he details, “it will make you feel blissful, I promise.”

“Then go ahead,” you smile, eyes still closed.

He hums, and then there is more movement. Suddenly two warm naked thighs straddle yours, the downy hairs tickling your skin, and your lips part in surprise.

“When did you get undressed, Mr Bridgerton?”

“I came back into this room naked, but sadly you missed it,” he teases.

Your eyes fly open, and you twist to look at him over your shoulder. “I demand an encore. Get back out there and walk in again,” you order with a slanted pout.

He laughs loudly this time, a sparkly sheen of bemusement over his enlarged pupils. “Sorry, you missed the show. It was a one-time thing,” he peals lighthearted.

Something in the air feels so soft, so sweet, so safe that you feel a pang of yearning that perhaps this could be your life. Living in this lovely cosy townhouse with this caring man who, when you ask, will tie you to the bed and fuck you so hard you scream the house down… but will also do this. Kiss every inch of your skin better. Lay with you in easy loving intimacy.

“I could get used to this, Mr Bridgerton,” you sigh.

“This could be your life,” he responds liltingly, “please choose me.”

“Benedict….” you warn.

“I know, I know,” he exhales, a touch defeated. “I would indeed rather have a part of you than none at all,” he confesses as you feel him place a sheet down next to you, and he opens a small glass bottle.

The air fills with the comforting aroma of calendula and oil. “This herb is good for healing. A number of my friends swear by it for their boxing injuries,” he explains as he rubs the oil into his hands to warm it. “Lay flat,” he advises, and you twist back, arranging your hands under your forehead and closing your eyes.

He begins at your neck, running lines over the tension you carry there. You cannot stop the noise you make as his talented, strong fingers knead at the knots there until they relent. It feels blissful, and all the tension you have carried since Aburey Hall melts away. He moves to your left, then right shoulder and does the same; your whole upper back turns to putty in his arms. His name is a ragged sigh escaping your lips.

He huffs a laugh at your intoxicated state and continues, his hands working their magic. It feels like one hand could span your whole back as he splays his fingers wide and expertly assuages your aches. Mapping down your spine with the side of his hands with a pressure that makes you groan so loud, it sounds entirely wanton.

“You make the most delightful noises,” he buzzes as he leans over you, his chest warm on your oiled back.

“Please do not stop,” you slur, drowsy, floating, so relaxed and high on a sea of pleasant brain chemicals.

“Do you want me to massage every inch of your body?” His voice is dark and sugary.

“Please…”

An oiled hand slides heavy down your spine, mapping the dip of your waist, then crests over the slope of your bottom cheeks. It keeps going, trailing the cleft of your bum, and your breath catches as his fingers glide lower, between your thighs, over your folds, slick from an entirely different source.

“How about here?” He murmurs smokily. “Do you want me to massage here?”

“God, yes, yes,” you moan and push into his fingers that just rest lightly on your swollen clit, not moving.

“Mmm, I will,” he promises, but you whine as his fingers move away and sweep up the same path to your backbone.

“Don’t tease me,” your plea is a hushed thing as his hands squeeze your shoulders and run up your arms to your hands, where they rest under your chin.

He chuckles warmly, the noise low in his throat. “But it's one of life’s greatest pleasures,” he asserts, lacing his fingers with yours as again those lips are by your ear. “You so very needy and hungry for me is the best high there is,” he sighs, his teeth biting your earring and tugging gently. “I have plans to ensure you are floating on a cloud of wonderment before we…” he trails off with an uncharacteristic bashfulness.

“....fuck?” you supply.

“...make love,” he corrects.

And something warm unfurls in your chest as he pulls up off your body, and those hands map your skin again, this time on your lumbar region, digging his thumbs in, to the point you cry out in relief and surprise. The unrealised tension you hold in your hips from being bent over that bench by Anthony seems to melt away as Benedict digs in and releases every knot you hold tight in your lower spine. The magic of his skilled hands has you docile and breathing slowly under his ministrations. Eyes closed and floating, just as he said. Your senses dialling back to a languid, almost tenuous hold on your surroundings, your experience rooted in your body and the newfound relaxation he brings to your being.

This time when his hand slips lower, you slowly suck in an anticipatory breath through your teeth that you do not release until his fingers swipe achingly light over your clit. You exhale raggedly as he finally takes pity on your weeping folds, and with a playful smirk you feel against your neck as he leans in to kiss there, he starts to circle your clit in a soft, expert tease.

You breathe his name, allowing him to fill your every thought, every fibre. Take over your body and direct it like a symphony, increasing the pressure of his touch and making you moan and bite down on your knuckles resting under your chin, pushing your pelvis into his hand.

“That is darling girl,” he encourages, his voice rich and resonant, seeming to vibrate through your very being.

“More,” you plead and grab the hand not between your legs, bringing it to your face and sliding your lips around two of his long, deft fingers, sucking them deep into your mouth, pulsing your tongue over the underside, tasting the massage oil and a flavour that is all him. It’s a catalyst that makes him groan and surge his naked body over you, all heated, toned flesh.

“Please,” your appeal garbled around his fingers that you suck as if it were his cock, deep pulls all the way down to his knuckles, and he growls and curls his fingers, hooking around the back of your lower teeth, his blunt nails digging into the sensitive flesh under your tongue. Something becomes more urgent between you as his rigid cock drags over your tailbone, his fingers curling around your clit more insistently as you instinctually spread your legs wider.

You whimper as he withdraws his fingers from between your legs and your mouth, and they crest your hip bones, painting your skin with your own arousal and saliva.

“Turn over, my girl,” he requests sotto voce, and you do so, rolling over so your oiled back is on the soft sheet he brought in. Your field of vision is filled with him—his face beaming down at you with a loving expression, his smooth chest and his skilled, soothing hands, which now move to cup your breasts as he settles between your legs, his cock brandishing your inner thigh. Greased fingers slide around your nipples, and you groan and push up, loving the slide and warmth.

“Kiss me,” he asks, his pupils blown and glittering, his lips an inviting sheen of pink.

Craning your head off the pillow to meet his lips, it's a tease for a few moments, and then you are hungrily devouring each other, tongues sweeping over one another, breathing shared air, swallowing the little noises you both make. As you kiss, your legs slip open wider until you feel him rocking the apex of your thighs, his public hair tickling your clit. The drawn-out tease makes your belly simmer with fire, ready to beg.

Then he is slipping down your body, his mouth hot and hungry on your nipples, making you pant and writhe as he uses an edge of teeth and then a swipe of tongue; a jolt right down to your clit. He moves lower; you know where he is headed, your clit pulsing and engorged as he heatedly glances up at you from your belly, a knowing crooked smile crowding over his handsome features.

When his nose trails into your thatch of hair and he inhales deeply, you can’t help clenching, your cunt so desperate for him, spellbound by his desire focussed so wholly on you. Almost aggressively, he manhandles your legs around his shoulders and, with no preamble, dives face-first into your folds, the noise and heat making you startle.

He has an almost vice-like grip on your thighs as his tongue parts your folds and unerringly finds your clit. He feasts on your body, even more than that night at Aubrey Hall when Anthony sat outside the room listening to you both. There was the frisson of being caught that gave that night an edge, but tonight feels different, more profound, and his efforts more meaningful but just as untamed. He gives long, languorous strokes with the flat of his tongue and sucks your labia into his mouth, tugging a fraction so you feel the pull in your throbbing clit. Then he spreads his mouth wide over that sensitive nub and sucks hard, a sudden stabbing sensation making your hands fly into his hair and push yourself into his face.

He groans encouraging words, drinking from your body, swirling his tongue until he hits a spot that makes you squeak, your nails scraping hard on his scalp. His tongue rolls around in increasingly fervid motions, and you feel that hook deep inside, coiling for release, needing a little more to push you over. As if sensing it, he snarls and glances the edge of his teeth onto that most responsive pinpoint; you call out his name loudly, rapidly circling that pinnacle.

“Please.” That one simple needy word from his lips has you undone.

A tide hitting you, that tension snapping inside. Strong waves emanate from your core, ecstasy racing through every inch of your body, your grip on his hair slackening as he drops gentle kisses onto your lower belly, making his way back up as your body shivers with aftershocks.

“Look into my eyes,” he implores quietly as he hovers over your face, your scent strong on his chin and lips.

You do, and while you are still fluttering from the orgasm, he slowly breaches your body, a solid mass stretching you open in that way that is so hypnotising. Your breath catches, and he growls as you pulsate around him.

He utters a curse, dropping his head briefly. Then his head snaps back up, his gaze intense but full of something else, something fundamental, and you have to swallow the lump in your throat as he bottoms out inside you, letting out a shuddering breath before placing a doting kiss on the tip of your nose.

“Tell me how you feel,” he hums over your cheekbone, his fingers trailing over your arms, shoulders, and neck, just holding still within you, letting you feel the way his cock holds you open, how you cling to him.

“Wonderful,” you confess, your body thrumming and yet relaxed, all your muscles before so aching now revived and sated.

With another kiss, he pulls back from within you and then pushes forward slowly, cupping your jaw, studying every inch of your face, watching your mouth form little noises as he takes you tenderly, slowly. He bends down and whispers inaudibly into your neck. It sounds like a foreign language, maybe French, but it’s so quiet under the crackle of the logs in the fire that you can’t decipher; you just let the sounds roll over you, into you, filling your heart. Distantly, you hear the patter of cleansing rain on the window behind the curtains, lending the room an even greater feeling of a haven, a cocoon from the outside world.

Your body undulates under his as he takes more pronounced thrusts, building a slow but steady rhythm that feels carnal and ethereal, as if you are floating above yourself, being taken away on a wave of serenity.

This isn't fucking; this is love-making. Something you have never really done before, something that feels too vulnerable and dangerous. But yet all you feel is safe and cared for, his eyes soft, his lips quirked in an affectionate smile. This is the succour your mind and body needed. To quell the turbulence and roiling guilt that has been clawing at your being. Torn between the man inside you now and his brother. So alike, so different, two sides of a coin you cannot choose heads or tails of.

You push up into him, angling your pelvis so he hits a spot inside you that makes your eyes roll, and your mouth slacken, greedy for another high so soon. He kisses your lips, breathes your air, encourages you with mumbled words, moving to pepper little kisses over your cheeks, making your scalp tingle and ripples run down your limbs. Your hands run greedily over his flesh, mapping his back muscles, scraping your nails over the globe of his bottom, pressing your thumbs into his flesh, wordlessly asking for more. Always more.

He tilts and moves deep, a spear just the right side of painful, causing you to moan; there is a triumphant chuckle as he kisses your eyebrows. The easy intimacy of the moment is so enchanting and yet so visceral. Every sense heightened, every touch burning, as if he had taken ash from the fire and painted it over your skin. You plead with him, pulling your legs higher, wrapping around his hip bones, wanting him to be so deep inside you carry a physical reminder tomorrow.

“My girl,” he whispers, the tone possessive and a hand slides between your head and the pillow, grasping and then twisting the hair at the nape of your neck between his strong fingers, a mild sting on your scalp as this take on a different more frenzied edge. You rasp his name, wanting nothing more right now than to be utterly owned by him under his thrall.

“Bite me,” he begs, and you falter. “You heard me,” he gusts into your left ear, angling his neck by your mouth. “I marked you with my teeth, darling girl; it is only fair you do the same.”

Something about the nature of the offering, the way he sees you as an equal, makes you feral, and you pitch forward and sink your teeth into the sturdy column of his neck before you can even engage the higher logic part of your brain. He grunts and thrusts harder, hissing for you to take more, your teeth clamping down before backing off to lathe your tongue over the bite mark.

Pulling back and seeing the evidence of your mark on him makes you clench around his cock with such force he growls and begs you to do it again. You do, his cock feeling huge, steely, so invasive. He stills, buried to the root inside you, and shudders all over.

“I never want to be anywhere but right here,” he groans fervently, “inside you, please, god, please let me.” The tone tinged with desperation as he restarts, urgent, spiking, the hand in your hair tangled amongst the strands. And in this febrile moment, it’s what you want too—always to have him touching you somehow.

You cry out as his other hand slides heavily down your contours, and his fingers plough into your folds, finding your clit and spiralling you higher, his gaze burning you.

“Come apart for me again, please; I'm so close,” he confides, his hips slightly erratic.

It won't take much, your whole body in a tinder state, and he is quickly hurtling you towards a new peak, engulfing your senses, enclosing your body, feeling as if he is everywhere at once.

There are a few rapturous moments where your whole body tenses, circling that abyss, robbing your lungs of air, your eyes fluttering closed. Before one more nudge of his cock and fingers and you are tumbling, freefalling. Every synapse fires as your core clenches on him, squeezing so hard you distantly hear him making noises that are almost inhuman, and you cry out as he quickly withdraws from your body, still pulsing and wanting; he splashes his release over your thighs with a grunting shudder.

He collapses atop you, breathing heavily, and for a few moments, there is nothing but the sounds of your panting, the dying log on the fire and the steady drumbeat of rain outside. When he pulls up again, his mien is affectionate, untangling himself from you and arranging your bodies into a comfortable hold.

He grabs the corner of the sheet and dutifully cleanses your skin of his seed, kissing your temple, staring at you with a reverence that feels almost too claustrophobic now the maelstrom of desire has passed. You bite your lip, and in the rush of chemicals in your bloodstream, you are suddenly overwhelmed. By his devotion, by the magnitude of what you feel for him and for Anthony.

“This is impossible,” you lament, fiercely willing the tears welling in your eyes not to fall. He knows precisely what you are referring to without you having to say it. He twists you in his arms so you lay atop him.

“I never want you to be in turmoil because of me,” Benedict says, his eyes clouding with emotion. He grabs your hands and kisses the back of your knuckles with a hot press of his lips. “If it means you have peace, I will desist. Step away,” he offers chivalrously. “I will always, always hold what we have dear, but I cannot be a source of distress to you.”

Your stomach lurches at the thought of not being with him.

“No, Benedict!” it’s a gut reaction from deep inside, a swoop in your stomach that feels like you are falling. “Please, do not. I….” words seem to fail on your tongue. “Just do not…,” you hiss. “You deserve me as much as your brother does. Fight for me,” you implore, knowing it is twisted to ask him to do this, to fight for you when you don't even know who to choose.

You swallow thickly as he looks at you through his lashes.

“I can picture it,” you say quietly, determined. “A life with you. Here, in this house. It’s wonderful, Benedict,” you answer honestly.

His eyes go soft and glassy, and you kiss his knuckles, echoing his gesture. And there is something bubbling up inside of you that feels decisive when….

There is a crash as the drawing-room door swings violently open.

And the bottom falls out of your world.

Anthony.

He stands in the doorway, his whole frame quaking, rain dripping from his jacket and the curls over his forehead.

Benedict startles and quickly grabs your chemise and his trousers, trying to conceal you both with the sheet the best he can. But it’s a pointless endeavour. It’s so very obvious what you have been doing, naked and entwined as you were on a pile of cushions in front of a fireplace with now glowing embers.

Anthony doesn’t say a word but strides into the room, breathing raggedly. As he draws closer, you see his face pinched, and his whole frame fizzles and crackles with energy. But it's not anger. It's something else, a nervousness that is verging on frantic.

“Don't,” his word is gruff and pained, screwing his eyes shut.

“Anthony,” you breathe.

“Please… don't… don't choose him,” he swallows and reopens his eyes. They are beseeching and desperate. “I’m not angry,” he adds, holding up a hand as if to explain, “I just… need you not to choose him.” You see the shake in his fingers as he lowers his hand. The hurt on his face makes your chest heave.

You hang your head as Benedict is silent next to you. Almost an equal in your shame. It was he who tempted you away from his brother in the first place; you can practically feel the guilt hanging heavily around his frame. In the silence, you quickly pull on your chemise and climb to your feet as Benedict pulls on his trousers and stays seated, curling in on himself, not looking up.

“This was tenderness, wasn’t it?” Anthony gestures to where you were lying, accurately surmising what happened from the surroundings and pacing slightly.

“Yes,” you whisper, almost ashamed, rooted to the spot.

“You… you never let me try that,” he utters; there is a world of hurt in that small voice, and he stops moving.

“I… I did not think you wanted to,” you decry, feeling a whiplash of confusion in your ribs. Anthony and lovemaking is not something you have ever considered; your dynamic always so much edgier, meeting your wilder needs.

“I believed I did not… until you,” those last two words whispered and lingering. “So much about you confounds me. Every time we are together, I’m left wanting more. Yearning for things I- I never thought I would. And now it feels like you are being stolen away…,” his Adam's Apple bobs hard. “I knew you would bond… with him. It’s why I begged you not to seek him out. I see your similarities… but… sometimes in life, we need someone different from ourselves. To be with someone who challenges us; that is a better balm for our souls. And so…”

The world seems to go into slow motion as Anthony drops to a knee before you.

“I want to humbly offer you me, my world,” you inhale a shocked gasp as he holds out a ring box. “Y/n, please be my wife?”

At your side, Benedict makes a forlorn noise, and he slides around in front of you on both of his knees.

“You asked me to fight for you, and by god, I will,” his pained appeal makes the ache in your chest spread wider, deeper. “I have no ring to offer you. I cannot offer you jewels and titles,” he winces slightly as he says it. “But I can offer you me and… and freedom. To pursue what you want in life, with me, as an equal, with no titles to burden you. All I can offer you is all we have experienced together. And my love. All my love. Always.” He holds up his hands almost in prayer and peers at you through heavy lashes, pleading his case.

“Titles are only a burden if you see them as such,” Anthony argues impassioned, his knuckles turning white as he grips the ring box. “As Viscountess, the world would be your oyster. And you deserve the world, y/n.”

“On that last point, I can agree; you do deserve the world” Benedict concedes.

Them steadfastly looking only at you but acknowledging each other’s points adds a weighted poignancy to the moment that almost hurts. Your head whips between the two. Both of these brothers, on their knees before you, their declarations sincere, their hearts on their sleeves. And yours beating wildly and torn in two different directions. An impossible conundrum. The very best and worse double bind.

You have no idea what on earth to do.

Benedict taglist: @makaylan @foreverlonginguniverse @iboopedyournose @colettebronte @aintnuthinbutahounddog @severewobblerlightdragon @margofiore @writergirl-2001 @heeyyyou @enichole445 @enchantedbytomandhenry @ambitionspassionscoffee @chaoticcalzoneranchsports @nikaprincessofkattegat @baebee35 @crowleysqueenofhell @bridgertontess @fiction-is-life @lilacbeesworld @angels17324 @broooookiecrisp @queen-of-the-misfit-toys @eleanor-bradstreet @divaanya @musicismyoxygen84 @benedictspaintbrush @miindfucked @sorryallonsy @lilithseve @cayt0123 @hottytoddyhistory @truly-dionysus @fictionalmenloversblog @zinzysstuff @malpalgalz @panhoeofmanyfandoms

Anthony taglist who may be interested in the last few paragraphs lol: @queenofmean14 @elizah99 @debheart @amanda08319

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starrysvn · 1 year

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married in vegas | choi san

pairing: choi san x gn!reader genre: exes2lovers synopsis: choi san had been your first true love and who you'd hoped would be your last. but things don't always work out. too bad your friends were his too, and jung wooyoung was hellbent on spending a long weekend birthday trip in las vegas. never mind your poor heart. warnings: drinking, swear words, a lil angst, dramatics, fluff, unedited word count: 5.2k author's note: fourth installment is here! hope you like this one, i recently rewatched that one episode of friends (iykyk) and just thought i'd put the final dialogue from it in here, kinda. ngl i feel like on the whole i could've done better but i hope you'll enjoy your read anyway! :3

series masterlist | regular masterlist

The breakup was amicable. You stayed friends and, sure, you didn’t hang out as much as you used to - for obvious reasons - and, yes, you did try to get out of any gathering that you knew he was going to be at. Still, you were civil. You could be in his presence.

And yet, all of that didn’t explain why the mere mention of him joining his best friend’s birthday trip to Las Vegas, had you circling around the room like a madman.

“I hope you’re fucking joking” you whine through the phone, earning a sigh from Yeosang.

“You’re blowing this way out of proportion”

“Am I?”

After talking your best friend’s ear off for minutes on end, that sounded wrong to your own ears.

“How did you not realize? San is Wooyoung’s best friend, of course he’d be there!” he reasons, as if you need a reminder that you are being ridiculous. “Plus, he’s taking a huge leap of faith in inviting you both”

“Listen, it was months ago, he didn’t use the group chat to invite us, I didn’t put two and two together. I had a lot on my plate! And hey, we’re civil!” The silence that meets you is so loud. You sigh. “Sorry for the dramatics, it’s been a long day”

After all, you are still recovering from having to dash home in a downpour. And having to stay after hours to have a long, unnecessary meeting with your head of department. Realizing your ex-boyfriend would also be joining your long weekend getaway was just the cherry on top.

“I’d say sorry for springing this up on you at the last minute, but then again, I could’ve just waited to see your face tomorrow” you hit him back with a real funny, Sang, smiling when you hear him snort. The line goes quiet for a second. “Do you want me to come over? We can head to the airport together in the morning” Yeosang says softly, a silent peace offering.

“Are you kidding? Have you seen the weather?” you look out the window, the rain’s still unforgivingly pouring down.

“Unlike you, I don’t refuse to drive in dire conditions” he pokes fun.

“You’re on thin fucking ice, Kang Yeosang”

“I’ll be over in ten” you could basically see his amused grin. You let out a chuckle hanging up. Then you press a hand to your forehead, trying to soothe the headache starting to form.

Choi San is the boyfriend. The one you never thought would leave. The one parting from hurt like nothing you ever experienced. The one you eventually bounced back from, but did you really? Because it still feels as if he was a part of you, just as much as you are a part of him. And when he left, you had to re-learn how to go through life with a missing piece.

He’d been your best friend, the person you ran to for everything. Someone you loved so much that it scared you sometimes because you knew just how much it would kill you to lose him.

Choi San is the one that got away and took a piece of you with him.

But what could you do, after months of healing and avoiding him, when your friends were his friends too? Declining invitations got old fast. The first time you saw him again, you thought you could handle his presence for the night. And you did but cried the whole way home. After that, no more. With time, it got better. Seeing him no longer left you with a sinking feeling. Of course, it isn’t like before, but it never could be, and you made your peace with that.

Still, after one year, you microdose on San, afraid of what could happen to your heart if you spent too much time close to him. It’s for your own sake, your peace of mind. That’s why, when it finally clicked into place that you’d be spending a whopping four days in his presence, you flipped.

The doorbell pulls you from your thoughts, and a smiley Yeosang holding a bottle of wine greets you. You should have known better than to accept alcohol as a peace offering from your best friend. Most of all, you should know that it never really ends with just one bottle. Because now you are incredibly hungover, severely nauseous and totally late for your flight.

“This is all your fault” you hiss as Yeosang asks the Uber driver to please hurry. Both your phones are annoyingly dinging with unread text messages, not helping your headache at all.

“Excuse you?” he turns around, tone accusatory. “As far as I remember, you were the one who brought out the tequila”

“Well, you didn’t stop me”

“You were crying!”

“Even worse!”

Your bickering is brought to an end by the screeching halt of the car in front of the airport. You ignore the severe wave of nausea it causes and get out, Yeosang right in tow. Incessant teasing and half-hearted blame tossing accompanies your run through the airport.

With just five minutes to spare, Wooyoung’s screeching hyena laughter welcomes the two of you at the gate. Surely the matching sunglasses and coats thrown over your pyjamas are a sight to behold, you think as you hug your friends hello.

“Birthday boy!” you pull Wooyoung into a big hug, giggling when he sways you both back and forth.

“Thank you for coming” he already said that months ago, when he first proposed the idea, but right now - with San’s eyes on you - the sincerity in Wooyoung’s somehow shines brighter.

“Thank you for having me” you smile genuinely. The breakup put a strain on your group of friends for a little, and you wanted to make sure he knew how much you appreciated him wanting you here. He squeezes your hand, before moving to Yeosang.

“We need to go, you’ll say hi in eleven hours when we land. Chop, chop!” Seonghwa rushes everyone to join the last few people in line. You let go of Mingi, laughing, hearing Yunho say something along the lines of they literally just started boarding, and follow the rest. You finish saying your hellos through boarding, finally facing San.

As you always do when it comes to him, you push down whatever mixed feelings bubbled up in your chest and put on a smile.

“Hi, San," you wave, so you're stunned when he just spares you a quick side hug, smiling curtly after greeting you.

Your friends had long stopped holding their breath whenever you two are in the same room, but this feels off. Like a splash of cold water, it sends you back to the first, awkward time you met up again. Nobody seems to notice though, apart from Yeosang. Unlike the rest of your friends, his gaze still lingers on you carefully. You subtly nod at him, like you always do.

Sighing, you keep walking beside your best friend, not really able to shake the disappointment San’s cold greeting leaves you with. Despite your best efforts, you let it eat away at you during the flight, the car ride to the hotel and the moments you unpack. No amount of berating does it. Why would he behave like that? Is this all in your head?

It’s not like you two would usually have heart to hearts but you talked, at least. You were friendly. So you don’t get why suddenly San is being so distant. For Wooyoung’s sake, you promised yourself you’d do your best to ignore it all. Be the bigger person and not get involved with whatever bullshit had his panties in a twist.

A whole day into the trip and you had to resist the urge to punch him in the face for behaving like an immature teenager multiple times. But you keep contact to a minimum. Complain to Yeosang in the comfort of your hotel room. Take several deep breaths. You aren’t good at this whole maintain-inner-peace thing.

“I just wish he would stop ignoring me”

The view from the panoramic terrace of the hotel is breathtaking, but, margarita in hand and sunglasses on, you find yourself not fully appreciating it. Not when you are using your time away from the rest of the group to vent to your best friend. Again.

“Ah, so you do care” the way Yeosang wiggles his eyebrows makes you want to wipe off that smirk on his face.

“No, I don’t” he doesn’t look too convinced. “Seriously! He’s just making it hard to get along with him”

“Or is his distance making you think about stuff you don’t want to think about?” you hate how much your best friend knows you. You let out an exasperated sigh.

The last thing you should be thinking about was your ex, but you can’t help it. He wouldn’t usually behave like that and, you had to admit, it threw you for a loop. Not to mention how you despise the way you still catch yourself thinking about him. It’s subconscious at this point and it's been hard to accept. Had he finally moved on? Were you the only one left running in circles inside your head?

No matter how much distance there is between the two of you, he’s still there, in a corner of your mind. Like a phantom pain, he follows you in the most mundane of things. The frozen aisle at the supermarket still reminds you of his favorite ice cream brand. When buying Christmas presents, your brain immediately goes to the one thing he’s been obsessing over. The reminders zap you like an electric shock, bringing you back to reality. San is a friend now - they say. Nothing more, nothing less. And so you’d berate your heart for acting like he wasn’t. You’d put down the tube of mint-choco ice cream with a sigh, and choose fucking socks as a present.

“Promise we won’t change?”

It was hard to make out the look on his face through the tears in your eyes. You never thought breaking up would hurt this bad, like giving up a piece of you. It felt like the end of the world. Of your world. One where you could no longer navigate life with San.

“You’ll always be my best friend” he murmured, lips against the skin of your neck. You felt the wetness on his face, too. “We’ll go back to how it was before”

But how could it? Now that you knew what it was like to be loved by him, and what a thing it was to love him. Against all hopes, that night, you hoped he was right.

No amount of space was ever able to lessen the strain the break-up put on your already existing friendship. You keep it amicable, for everyone else’s sake, but it just isn’t like before. It could never be. You both broke that promise, one that perhaps you shouldn’t even have made.

You’ve long realized that it’s closure that you need. Because the two of you healed separately, but never really talked about it together. It’s a conversation you need to have if you intend on being around each other. What scares you the most, though, is the possibility of something happening. Or rather, of you letting it happen. You aren’t so sure about San. If you truly want to let go, you need to know.

The dings of your phones pulls you from your thoughts.

meet in the lobby in an hour-ish? we’re going out!

You share a look with Yeosang, knowing birthday celebrations are due tonight, and Wooyoung isn’t about to hold back.

“Let’s go” your best friend offers an encouraging smile, walking back to the room with you.

The second you go down to meet with your friends, you feel yourself stumble on your heels and almost wish to find a way out of this dinner party. Now, you aren’t a stranger to San’s beauty, you never were. But holy fuck, how you wished that he was still yours. If he were, you could saunter up to him and tell him just how breathtaking he looked with his unbuttoned white shirt and slicked-back hair. The knowledge hits you like a train and leaves you breathless.

You need a drink.

And, boy, do you get one.

You don’t remember the last time you had this much fun. Wooyoung sure knows how to party. The dinner went quite smoothly - safely hidden between Yeosang and Mingi, you didn’t spare much attention to San, not that he spared you any - and soon after the birthday boy dragged you to a club.

“Sunshine!” Wooyoung appears out of nowhere, stealing you away from your impromptu dance battle against a buzzed Mingi. “Don’t you look stunning” he compliments, twirling you around, flirty as usual. You cackle, throwing your hands on his shoulders.

“Thanks Woo, you look dashing” you wink back, dancing with him.

“You shouldn’t be saying that to me,” he laughs. The confusion in your eyes must be enough for him to elaborate. “I noticed you’ve been eyeing a certain someone… who happened to be eyeing back”

“Who?” you’re going to fight this. No way.

“Don’t play dumb now” his face gets closer until his lips are pressed against the shell of your ear. “If looks could kill, I’d be dust right now. So would be Mingi” you gape at him, watching as he smiles amusedly.

“Wooyoung, we’re not going to talk about me and him during your birthday party”

“Oh, please! My birthday wish is for you two to get back together already!” homeboy is drunk. Your jaw hits the floor, and you smack his arm. He just laughs harder.

“Wooyoung, what!? You can’t be serious”

“Come on! You’re both incredibly oblivious about your feelings. It's getting sad” he groaned in frustration. “You’re still obviously hung up on each other and I can’t take it anymore, it’s excruciating! Take me out of this misery”

“There’s a reason we called it quits, Woo” you deadpan, taking a step back from him.

“And it’s a stupid one,” he looks like he’s about to say more, but he can’t.

“Alright enough” because Yunho, your saving grace, intervenes. “We’re going back to our booth” he shoots you an apologetic smile, half dragging the birthday boy away and back to the others. You don’t know how much of the conversation he caught, but judging by the good-natured scolding he’s doing, it was enough. You sigh, deciding it’s time for your well-deserved drink. As soon as you reach the bar, you claim the last free stool for yourself.

Wooyoung’s words won’t leave you alone. They keep bouncing around in your head louder than the booming music. Was it really a stupid reason? But most of all, how drunk does he have to be to insinuate that San is still in love with you? That you are still in love with him?

You nod to the bartender when the drink lands in front of you.

The night you broke up is a tangled up mess of emotions and memories you rarely ever allow to resurface. At first, it hurt too much, and then, just like everything else San, you tried to forget in order to move on. But if you think long enough, you still feel him slip away from you, the hollow in your chest when you woke up the morning after and his head wasn’t resting on the pillow beside yours.

Lazily, you toy with the straw of your drink.

It was something about work and it keeping you apart that drove a wedge into your relationship. The nights when one of you would pass out waiting up for the other started to become the norm. The arguments that the lack of each other’s presence fired up outnumbered the sweet talks you used to have over dinner.

Bitter words were spoken, and everything crashed and burned to its fateful end. The mutual decision to break it off before you broke the other seemed the best option. You never truly gave yourself time to think if you regretted it, afraid that bringing it up would only prevent you from letting San go. So, you foolishly swept it under the rug.

And now, here you are, downing your drink in response to the wave of emotions Wooyoung’s words elicited in you. Trying to ignore how your skin crawls every time the man sitting beside you lays his eyes on you. Inching away every time he tries to talk to you.

“We’re leaving” there is no mistaking his voice, but it feels so foreign. You turn around, facing him. His unreadable eyes send a chill down your spine. You lift a brow in question.

“You’re drunk,” San shrugs. “I’m taking you back to the hotel”

Who does he think he is? Looking down at you from his high horse of righteousness, worrying about you like he cared. You scoff.

“‘M not and you most definitely aren’t” you turn around in your seat, facing away from him.

“Are too, come on” San’s hand reaches for your arm, turning you back around and trying to safely get you off the stool.

“And what’s it to you?” you finally snap, shrugging him off. “You haven’t spoken more than two words to me the whole trip, why do you care now?”

Despite your resolution not to cry, or not to care, you feel tears stinging in your eyes. So much for not letting him phase you.

“Yeah, let go man” all hopes of getting out of this situation are ruined the second the guy sitting beside you speaks. You roll your eyes, bracing for what’s to come and cursing yourself for not leaving the bar after getting your drink. “Who are you to ruin their fun?”

“I’m their boyfriend”

Of course.

But you can’t deny that the way he says it - like he very much believes it - moves something inside you.

San doesn't waste any time and doesn’t wait for a reply. His fingers wrap around your wrist delicately, making goosebumps cover your skin. His hold is familiar, warm and it makes you feel like crying. Too stunned to speak, you let him carry you through the stuffy club, not even bothering to apologize to the people you bumped into.

It takes way longer than you’d like to get out of the club, and the lump in your throat is getting harder to ignore by the second. Suddenly, you don’t feel like blaming San all that much for ignoring you.

Once the cold air of the night hits you, you free yourself from his firm grasp. San stops dead in his tracks, looking at you. You can’t do this right now. You worked so hard to keep things civil between you two, you can’t fight with him on Wooyoung’s day. Knowing that one more word from him would break you. You take a deep breath.

“You just had to do that, didn’t you?” Clearly, it didn’t work.

“And here I was, thinking I was going to get a thank you”

You point a finger at his chest. “I can handle my own, San” and there it is, that look on his face that tells you he knows better. He knows you. And for a moment, you hate that he’s right. For a moment, you hate him for fucking with your head. “And you know perfectly well what I’m talking about”

“Do I?”

“What do you want me to tell you, San? You’ve been acting all distant and righteous these past couple of days, and then you pull this stunt?” This is most certainly a conversation you don’t want to have in the middle of the street, but oh well. “You could’ve just asked if I wanted a ride back to the hotel, there was no need for all that”

A gust of wind blows by, making you shiver. When San moves closer, all traces of his anger gone, you stand still, holding your breath. Dumbstruck, you follow his every movement. San peels his jacket off, only to drape it over your shoulders. Something he’s done a million times before. A melancholy so strong pulls at your heartstrings. You didn’t think he noticed. His touch lingers a second too long, eyes looking into yours as if asking if what he just did was alright.

“Thanks” you mumble, watching him step back. The warmth melts your anger away as much as it messes with your head. You don’t like how the air shifts and becomes heavy with the weight of words left unsaid.

But what would you even tell him? That, apparently, for how much you tried, you can't move on? That he lingers in your mind, in your heart, your apartment. That he’s still all over you, and you don’t know how to shrug him off – you aren’t even sure if you want to.

“I miss you” the words leave your lips before you have a chance to stop them. You definitely shouldn’t have drunk tonight. San’s eyes are on you in a split second, but yours stay focused on the pavement. You can feel his gaze putting you on the spot, begging you to say more. You don’t.

“Me too” he speaks so quietly that his words almost get lost in the night.

San waves a taxi over and helps you in. The whole ride back is quiet; you’re a second away from bursting into tears, having finally realized the extent of your feelings for San. Only cursing Wooyoung for being right keeps you in one piece until you reach the door to your room.

You go to unlock it and turn around to give him his jacket back. Not being surrounded by his scent sends your heart to your feet. You can’t believe all the work you did not to feel like this anymore has gone to shit.

“Thank you,” you say once more, before turning to step into your dark room so you can cry to your heart’s content and pretend none of this happened in the morning.

San’s hand grips yours, stopping you in your tracks. When he whispers your name, you’re done for. One second you’re about to hide in your room and the other he’s turning you to him. You can see how he's looking for the words to say. You know that expression all too well, you recognize the furrow of his brow. Then e pulls you closer and the breath gets knocked out of your lungs. He’s closer than he’s ever been in a year and pressed as you are against his chest, you’re afraid he might hear the way your heart is furiously beating.

His sorry eyes are scanning every inch of your face, or so you think, blinking back tears. Under his gaze, you’re burning. Because you want him to let you go and hold you closer at the same time. His hands on your hips are still delicate, you can break free at any time, but you’re not sure you want to.

Your breath hitches when his forehead connects to yours, you can’t breathe, you can’t think-

And then he’s kissing you, and it’s like coming home. It tastes sweet like your drink and bitter like the whiskey on his tongue. You’re unsure if the saltiness is from your tears or his. It’s familiar and your gut tells you that it’s so right, so good that you push yourself closer, lose yourself in him. San’s hold on you is almost bruising, and he’s kissing you like you’re the only thing he’s ever known. Like he used to when he wanted to show you just how much he loved you-

You push away from him like you’ve been stunned. His confused eyes search your face, asking what’s wrong. You clear your voice, but no words leave your mouth. So, when he calls your name with a voice so fragile that it makes you shiver, it’s all you can do to bid him goodnight and finally lock yourself in your room.

Your lips are still tingling, you still feel San’s mouth on yours. In the darkness, a sob wrecks you. You’re supposed to be over him. You spent so much time trying to be. Your heart shouldn’t be breaking this way; for the time you lost trying to forget him, for how all your efforts were in vain.

“Let me in” though muffled by the door, his voice makes you jump. “Please”

Another loud sob escapes you, and you curse yourself for not stepping away from the entrance. Of course, he’d stay. Of course, he’d hear. Well, you can’t run now, can you?

When you open the door, San’s head shoots up. He goes to take a step but hesitates. You simply open the door wider, and he visibly relaxes. After letting him in, you close the door and turn on the lights. The silence is thick, and you almost can’t breathe.

“I’m sorry” he starts, catching your attention. “I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have… I shouldn’t have done a lot of things these past few days” despite your tears, you manage a scoff.

“Why?” it’s all that leaves your lips, but you know he’s caught on. You’re met with silence. Disappointment spreads like wildfire in your heart. He doesn't even have an answer - you bitterly think.

“So you’ve got nothing to say for yourself?” you push, starting to feel the anger bubble up inside. “You know how hard I’ve tried to make this trip work for Wooyoung's sake? For all our friends' sake? So that they don’t have to walk on eggshells around us, or invite us out one at a time?”

“And I haven’t!?”

“Oh, don’t sound so surprised, San!” you take a step closer. “We were doing alright, why’d you have to go and act like you have a stick up your ass whenever I’m around? Wooyoung’s your best friend, for crying out loud!”

“Don’t act all high and mighty! Have you ever considered, hell, even ever stopped to think-”

“Have I?” oh, if he only knew. “Have I? All I ever do is think, San! You’ve haunted all of my what-ifs ever since we broke up. So you can’t go ahead and pull shit like this when I’ve been trying my damn best”

Your voice is thick with emotion and your throat feels tight. The deafening silence that meets you makes your ears ring. San visibly deflates and the way he speaks is in open contrast to how you just did.

“Would you keep trying?” you don’t remember the last time you heard him sound so small. Still, his eyes are so full of determination.

“Why would I?” you ask, defeated. It’s like a flip switches inside him.

“Because I love you! I still love you”

Time stops, and for a moment nothing exists but you and your racing heart. It’s going so fast you fear it might beat out of your chest, or that he might hear it. It’s so loud that it rings in your ears. A surprised gasp escapes your lips: you understood perfectly fine, you just can’t believe the words he just so desperately uttered.

“I’ve been in love with you longer than I can remember. I loved you when I thought I’d never get to tell you again. I loved you when loving you quietly and at a distance was all I could do, but it was alright as long as I got to love you”

“San…”

“I’m sorry for earlier. I’m sorry for these last couple of days. There’s no excuse, but I just…” he sighs, closing his eyes. You go to take another step, but all determination to do so dies when you see him produce a little velvet box from his pocket. Your breath hitches and a sigh of his name leaves you. “All I could think about leading up to this trip was our first anniversary. You remember how we joked about eloping in Las Vegas?”

It seems your tears won’t stop flowing. You can’t believe he remembers. It was such a small thing, it takes you a second to connect the dots. It was a comment thrown around, something you said to make him laugh. Though you remember thinking that if he’d asked, you would’ve said yes in a heartbeat.

“I’ve had this since then” hope sparks in your heart, though you’re not really sure you’re even breathing right now.

“San-”

“Don’t. I know this is so incredibly stupid, I don’t even know why I brought this with me-”

“Ask me” finally, finally he looks up at you and there’s no doubt in your mind. You still love him, you always have. You always will.

“What?”

“Choi San, ask me or I will” he’s blanking, frozen in his spot. So, you get down on one knee. His eyes widen and you hear sounds of protest. Suddenly it’s a race on who’s speaking first, both on your knees, face to face. You’re giggling like idiots, tears in your eyes.

“I thought that I could manage life without you” he starts, and you let him intertwine your fingers. “I thought we could go back to being happy without being in love. That we’d be better at a distance, but I was so wrong. The only thing that matters is that you make me happier than I ever thought I could be, and if you let me, I'll spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel the same way. Fighting to make us work. I already made the mistake of giving you away once, I'll never make it again"

"Will you marry me?”

You waste no time in kissing him, big smiles barely making it a kiss, but you don’t care. You don’t care because San just asked you to marry him. Because he’s lifting you up and spinning you around and kissing you like he’ll die if he doesn’t. And for the first time in a while, you’re happy. So happy you could burst, laughing like you haven’t since you let him go.

“Do you think we should go get married?” he asks, swaying you around in his arms. You stare up at him, snorting.

“Maybe let’s wait till tomorrow, when our friends aren’t drunk off their faces, you know?” he chuckles, looking at you like you’re the only thing that could ever hold his attention. How could you ever convince yourself even for one second that you didn’t want to fight for him?

bonus:

Yunho’s slowly munching on a croissant, head resting on Mingi’s shoulder – who’s barely awake. You fear Wooyoung’s not even on your same astral plane right now, forehead against the table and hand gripping a coffee cup for dear life. Yeosang’s head is thrown back against the wall, he’s sipping slowly at his own coffee. It almost makes you think that you and San walking hand in hand could go unnoticed.

“Is that a ring?” you should’ve known Seonghwa’s sharp eyes wouldn’t miss it. After all, he’s the only one remotely awake. That, and he’s the only one not wearing sunglasses at the breakfast table. Lethargically, your friends’ faces emerge from behind the shades. Various sets of eyes squint in your direction as you come closer.

“Holy fuck you got back together” surprisingly, the voice is Wooyoung’s, though he sounds exactly like he just came back from the dead.

“Technically, we got engaged,” San points out. The words have barely left his mouth that suddenly his best friend is up and asking what, how, when, and why?! Eliciting various groans and shut the fuck ups.

“My birthday wish came true!” he throws himself at you both, squeezing you in a hug. Over his shoulder, you look at Yeosang. Despite his tired face, he smiles at you. So do the rest of your friends.

“Alright so, wedding tonight before we leave?” Wooyoung smirks all too enthusiastically, and you hear Seonghwa mumble as long as we drink juice, eliciting a round of quiet laughs.

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