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#he said you'll never get rid of me what i did to you will always linger <3

saetoru · 1 year

Text

✩ ‧₊˚ ✩。DIFFICULT — GOJO SATORU.

「 SYNOPSIS 」 ⋮ gojo is too stubborn to let you peacefully sleep on the couch (1.2k words)

☽ contents ⋮ mentions of an argument but it's fluff, gn! reader, annoying gojo bc who is he if not a headache

☽ notes ⋮ he is so cute i wanna stab him

gojo satoru is difficult to have arguments with.

he’s stubborn and never seems to take things seriously and he never really listens to a word you say—everything always goes in one ear and out the other. like when you tell him you'll be on the couch for the night so you can have space, for example. it seems space is not a word in gojo's dictionary, because he strolls into the living room with his hands in his pockets and his lips whistling a soft tune. you glare at him from your spot on the couch, watching as he stops a few feet before you.

there’s a smooth grin on his face, almost too smooth—like he’s plastered it on for appearance’s sake, like it masks the true nature of his feelings as he hides them with that usual unbothered smile of his.

“is there room for one more?”

“no,” you say bluntly, promptly turning away to face your back to him. you don’t have to look back to know his face is curled into that pout of his—the dangerous one that does too good of a job of convincing you to give him his way.

“kay, fine,” he huffs, and then you hear the soft thud of his body settling on the floor, making you itch to turn and peek over the edge of the couch. you succeed at ignoring for him for approximately thirty seconds before the curiosity gets the better of you and you swallow your pride and take a quick look.

sure enough, he lies curled on the hardwood floor, limbs awkwardly sprawled as he stares up at you with innocent eyes.

"what are you doing?" you furrow your brows, and he stares at you like you've asked a silly question—maybe you have. being hard to get rid of has always been gojo's specialty, and you should know better by now that retiring to the couch is never enough to retire from him.

"i'm going to sleep. what does it look like?" he says like it's obvious. you almost smack him with your pillow for his tone, but you have half a mind not to—it's the perfect opportunity for him to steal it, and it's not your problem he forgot the single most important thing when it comes to sleeping.

"well, why here?" you scowl, making him shrug as he settles his hands behind his head and looks up to the ceiling.

"seems like a good spot to sleep," he says casually, "nice hard floor to cushion my back, cool breeze of the air conditioning to keep me cold, the clock ticking in my ear to keep me up. perfect place, huh? and if i get bored, we even have a tv!"

"i let you have the bed, you idiot," you purse your lips.

"who needs a bed when i can sleep on the hardwood floor next to my sweet little baby—" you cut him off before he can finish, feeling the last possible vein you can preserve while dating a man like gojo satoru pop.

"well, then i'm going to use the bed if you don't," you sit up, grabbing your pillow and blanket. and because he's gojo satoru, the bane of your existence and the sole cause of all your headaches, he sits up too.

"good idea, baby! let's go—"

"no. you stay here, and i'll take the bed."

"okay," he hums, still not making any moves to lay back down.

you quickly realize this isn't a battle you can easily win with him—as is any battle, really—and you roll your eyes, shoulders slumping in defeat as you glare down at him. he looks up at you with that same innocent look—those same wide eyes that blink up at you like they couldn't possibly do any wrong.

"you realize i'm not sharing the bed with you just because you're stubborn, right?" you ask dryly.

he grins, that familiar glint in his eyes that always means trouble, "well, i never said anything about taking the bed, did i?"

"satoru, you can't possibly mean sleeping on the floor next to the bed—"

"it's technically not the bed," he insists, "all you said is you're not sleeping with me. you never said anything about near me."

"okay, i don't want to sleep near you," you scowl.

"ah ah," he shakes his head, "you can't add rules now. it's too late."

"satoru—"

"so what'll it be? bed or couch?"

"i hate you," you grumble, settling back down on the (uncomfortable) cushions of your living room couch, back once more facing him. you can hear his body softly settle back onto the floor again, and after a few beats of silence, he speaks up again.

"can i use your blanket? i'm cold."

"no."

"c'mon, just toss half of it over the edge, i'll scoot. we can make it work—"

"are you trying to piss me off?" you snap as you sit up, glaring down at him once more.

gojo satoru is difficult to have arguments with. he's stubborn and annoying and so stupidly handsome. he makes your eyes soften before you can help it as they graze over his messy hair and the soft glow of his lip balm. he makes your anger ebb away slowly no matter how hard you try to latch onto it just from that toothy grin of his. he makes you forget you're arguing and that you should be mad when you notice the soft, gentle traces of love in his eyes.

so you blink as you watch him, letting out a quiet sigh as he shakes his head and offers you a small, innocent smile—one that tells you he loves you, that he's not mad, that he'll wait on the cold, hard floor with no pillow and blanket for you as long as he needs to.

"no," he chuckles, "no i'd never want to make you mad. you're scary when you get mad."

"that's rich, coming from the strongest sorcerer in the world," you mutter, making him laugh softly. and you're not mad anymore—not as much as you were just a bit ago.

maybe it's because you love him too, even despite the way he makes your veins pop, and your patience thin, and your head ache with that aggravating personality of his. maybe that's what love is, when even the bad and the ugly are part of the good.

"behind every strong man is an even stronger—"

"just come here," you groan, scooting over to make room for him on the couch. he doesn't need to be told twice—doesn't even waste a moment as if he's been expecting it all this time as he climbs in beside you and pulls you into his chest.

and it's cramped—it's slightly uncomfortable as your legs dangle over the edge and your pillow barely fits under both of your heads. but his body is warm and his arms hold you tight and you can faintly make out out the thrum of his heart against your body.

maybe it's not so bad—not if it's gojo.

"did you miss me too much?" he wriggles his brows, pouting when you shove his face away as he leans in for a kiss.

"still haven't earned kisses back yet," you grin, "goodnight satoru."

"but i can't sleep without a goodnight kiss—"

"love you," you cut him off with a giggle.

gojo satoru is difficult to have arguments with—but you think you win this time.

i want to have gojo satorus babies

#teepods.writings #drabbles.#gojo x reader #gojo x you #gojo fluff #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru x you #gojo satoru fluff #jjk x reader #jjk x you #jjk fluff #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen x you #jujutsu kaisen fluff

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all444miles · 11 months

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can you do miles with and earthy black girl! Like I can see him wanting her nose rings, and accessories but don’t get me started on how he SIMPS for her waist beads. He loves seeing her at school with her hair wrap and locs and her lavender and coco sent, she’s a calm person to!

thank you so much for your AMAZING work God bless❤️❤️❤️❤️

— DOWN TO EARTH

— pairing: both miles' x black!earthy!fem!reader — genre: fluff — summary: what its like for both miles' to date an earthy girl ‹3 — a/n: quick note, the reader calls 1610 miles "bambi" as a nickname becuase he reminds her of a baby deer ‹3 (credits to my pookie for that !!) — a/n 2: I didn't know which miles you meant, so i just did both 😭 also pretend that brooklyn visions academy doesnt have a uniform.. i was tired writing this so im rlly rlly RLLLY sorry if this is bad but, i hope you like this, and enjoy !! ‹3

E-42 MILES

Miles loves being in your room. the smell of burning coconut incense, the look of your fairy lights, the small plants, it felt so chill, so peaceful. he liked that.

he always knows which incense you've used, and will pick up if you've changed them. He'll buy you some if you need any more.

"You got rid of the coconut incense? Mami, that one was my favorite." "Baby, I only have one pack left." "Oh? Aight, i'll buy you some tomorrow."

he'll never tell you, but if he misses you, he'll listen to your favorite songs that you'd always hum to yourself when you two are alone.

does he like Erykah Badu? Yes, yes he does. he'll listen to Green Eyes on his missions with his uncle whenever he gets the chance.

his uncle caught him once; one of the most embarrassing moments of his life.

"Kid, you listenin' Erykah Badu? Ian know you into allat." "Yo chill, it's only cuz my girl like her." "Mhm. You sure you my nephew or am I trippin?" "Tio, let's just roll."

he's loves to cuddle with you, especially cause you always smell like lavender. he won't let you go either.

"Miles, I gotta get some food." "Nuh, in a minute." "Hun, you done said that 2 minutes ago." "Exactly, in a minute. I like being here."

absolutely in love with your waist beads. he loves the jewllery you were (you both have matching necklaces), but your waist beads? goes absolutely crazy whenever you wearing a crop top and you have them on.

one time you two were at a beach and you wore them with your bikini, he might as well have fell in love with you all over again. bro has his hands on your waist the whoooleee time.

"Princesa, never take off your waist beads." "Why? You like 'em?" "¿Gustarme? Chica, Dios mío, estoy enamorada de ellos." (Like them? Girl, my god, i'm in love with them.) "Miles!" "What? I'm just appreciating my queen n her style, ion see no problem."

E-1610 MILES

Miles is obsessed, like, obsessed, with your style.

if you two live close, he'll style your locs and do your head wrap for you before school.

if not, he'll come to school excited to see your ootd. that is, as if you don't send them to him everyday before school.

"You look gorgeous in your outfit, amor." "Thank you Miles. You do know i already showed you it before school, right?" "So? It's always better to see my wife's outfits in person." "Bambi, you so corny."

he draws you, all the time. look through his sketchbook and you'll find drawings of his friends from the spider society, his uncle, and thousands of you.

Instead of doing what his twin does, when he misses you, he'll draw you. He misses you a lot.

"Baby, can I see your sketchbook?" "..Uhm, yeah! Sure." "You draw me? Awwe, that's so cute."

he loves how calm you are, he actually thinks of you as an angel the way you're so peaceful.

he thinks your nose rings are so gorgeous. if you let him pick which nose ring, he'll be so honored.

adores the fact you smell like lavender. he'll always lay his head into the crook of your neck because he loves your scent sm.

like his counterpart, he's so fascinated to your waist beads. like, he just thinks you look so beautiful with em. One time, you put his hands on your waist, he honestly didn't know what to do with himself.

"Mami, did you know I love your waist beads?" "Yes, bambi, i know." "Nah, but I loooovvveeeee them!" "Baby, i know!" "Like, I looooooooooooovvvvvvvveeeeee them!" "Love, please."

likes, reblogs, comments and asks are always appreciated !

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yanderehsr · 7 months

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Thinking about the "veronica open the door please!"....What if reader was to lock themselves in the bathroom to get rid of the yandere after a break up? Could I please have this scenario?^^ Ooooo make that be hibiscus lunae, Venti and Aether! Also, how r u? How have u been? Do you mind the fact that I send quite a few requests? Anyways, ty for reading my request <33

Ah yes, Hibiscus Lunae🤣. And no need to be worried, you can send in as many asks as you want.

Anyways, hope you'll enjoy😄

Trigger Warning: Yandere, Obsessive behaviour, Possessive behaviour, Kidnapping

Imbibitor Lunae: He bangs on the door over and over again, hoping to break it down, to get you back, he can hear your whimpers of fear yet cannot bring himself to care right now, you are HIS, he must have you back. He just needs this stuped door down.

When Imbibitor Lunae finally breaks down the door and sees you on the ground, crying and trying to push yourself further back, he can't help but to be happy, you are here and you are coming with him, whether you want to or not.

"I regret ever agreeing to this break up, what I have said before holds true now as well, you are mine, always has been and always will"

Venti: Come out, Comeoutcomeoutcomeout, don't you trust him, why do you lock yourself away from him, the boy is desperate, he will punch, kick and scratch the door, please come out, he wants you back, no he needs you back.

Venti begs you to come out, he needs to see you. He may be an archon but he wouldn't hesitate to grovel on the ground as long as he gets a second chance, should he not get that second chance then he would break the door down and tackle you into the ground, Venti will cry and hug you, now don't struggle, he will just take you somewhere only he will ever gaze upon you again.

"Honey, please talk to me... I-I need to hear your voice, can you not do this for your boyfriend... what do you mean break up, we never broke up, stop spouting lies"

Aether: You can hear him from the other side, banging on the door and screaming at you to open, he doesn't sound angry, more worried than that. You didn't think your ex boyfriend would show up to get you back, much less try and force you back into the relationship, it seems his possessiveness hadn't relinquished.

You can see Aether's efforts is starting to crack the wood in the door, you curl up to protect yourself, it may be useless when it's the Traveler of all people trying to get you, but it makes you feel safe, you hear the door break open, all is quiet until you feel his warm embrace around you, he hugs you and says nothing until...

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you... why did you have to break up with me, all I wanted you to be is safe... now hold on, I'll carry you somewhere better, somewhere without any people who will steal you away"

#yandere #yandere honkai star rail #yandere hsr #yandere genshin impact #yandere genshin #yandere male #yandere imbibitor lunae #yandere imbibitor lunae x reader #yandere venti #yandere venti x reader #yandere aether #yandere aether x reader

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yuri-is-online · 15 days

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Hi hi so can we have an expansion of middle school Floyd completely being his unfiltered self around yuu (maybe even octotrio going like "Oh please don't believe that merculture is like this" because middle school Floyd is embarrassing them in front of their crush) PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

Hmmm

So Floyd says morays are cowards right, but my experiences with little kids tell me that they don't always have the best sense of self-preservation. I picture little Floyd as one of those kids on crack. He thinks this human is cute! Especially because they don't have the sense to be afraid of him at all and are calling him cute, that's real funny. What if he just takes a big chomp outta ya, will you still think he's cute? As for the embarrassment, well...

Azul

It comes from how blunt little Floyd is.

He's got even less patience for Azul's plans than big Floyd does, and the complete inability to see the value of waiting for the pay off. He's actively getting angry at him and throwing temper tantrums every time Azul tries to smooth things over with Yuu.

"No you can't get the ability to breathe underwater from kissing a mermaid Floyd is making that up. And no not all merfolk are obsessed with legs that's just a him thing-"

"Nah Azul really likes your legs and pretty much everything you do with them!" Little Floyd is loud enough that other people than just you are looking at him in confusion (Azul is convinced it is overwhelming judgment) because he's choking on a mixture of spit and air because how did he pick up on that already?!? Azul thinks he's so subtle when he admires you, he's got to be so you don't think he's weird.

He can't wait for this to be over, he can handle being made fun of by the twins now since they've got a good rapport and he can give as good as he gets but little Floyd is like a sea otter with a clam, he just won't let this go because he thinks octopus courtship is boring and he's not above saying that. Outloud. In front of you.

Jade

It's from how willing he is to throw Jade under the bus.

Floyd knows Jade pretty well, even if it's a younger version of him so he knows just how down bad stupid Jade is within 15 seconds and he is determined to "help."

Said help is mostly just humming a very specific song while swimming around you in circles and doing little tricks to "set the mood." Or asking you what you think about Jade when he thinks he's out of earshot, something he's never once been since little Floyd got summoned.

He thought this would be fun, Floyd is always so delightfully unpredictable and now there's two of him! But instead of bothering Azul he's decided to torture Jade and ruin his carefully cultivated image instead. He sort of gets why Azul was so determined to get rid of all his childhood photos now, you're never going to look at him the same after this.

When his efforts don't work because Jade is too much of a coward little Floyd starts just telling you a bunch of stuff they got up to as kids in an effort to embarras him. It clearly works from how quick Jade is to shove him to the side but you're polite enough to keep the laughter to a minimum. For the most part

Floyd

It comes from how much of a coward he is.

Floyd is waiting for the right time to speak with you, when he's extra sure that you feel the same as he does. When he knows you'll accept everything he wants to give you and more.

But no. Little him has to say everything that comes into his mind. "Are your legs soft? Why are you leaking seawater? Do all humans really only have ten toes and can I count them-"

If you find this funny, I think it might depress him somewhat. He wants you to see all the ways he's smart and not brush him off as an unserious joke. If you think it's cute, well that's a mix of emotions. He doesn't want you to see him as cute now, but it's ok if you find morays cute, and even nicer if you find baby morays cute. That thought alone perks him up.

Until little Floyd starts telling Yuu he thinks they're cute. Then he gets possessive and starts competing with himself like a looser. Probably by picking Yuu up and carrying them away since his legs are longer and he can get away faster.

#<3 asks #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #floyd leech x reader #jade leech x reader #azul ashengrotto x reader #I'm writing this on my phone so apologies if there's any typos #I'm thinking about getting soup #or pizza #... probably just gonna have some cereal though

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 3 months

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Look, This is gonna be one of those things that sounds bad until you read the whole story. Please don't read the title and go to 'yta' without reading.

AITA for yelling at our friend that my brother isn't trans?

Look, My brother ISNT trans. He likes to wear kilts and sew, Which is what kind of started all of this. My brother is NOT trans, He loves being a boy (trust me, I can hear him enjoying being a boy in his room all the time. Theres no way he'd wanna chop it off(I mean this as a joke I don't actually know how the surgery works), He's told me multiple times that being told by others what he likes is 'feminine' and 'girly' upsets him because he's proud of being a boy and doesn't like being called a girl. Its not because he hates girls or thinks less of them, He just does not like being called the wrong gender which I'm sure you want to be called the correct gender too.)

Anyways lets begin. I (16F) am my little brothers (15M) best friend, Basically. We grew up together and do everything together, Including sewing. I liked it when I was younger, And eventually convinced him to try it as well. He loved it, And we love just sitting together and making random crap we usually end up selling at our yearly garage sale. (Our mom makes us sell all our unneeded crap every year, But we aren't complaining when we make like $100 for it, Mom and dad even help us figure out what we actually wanna keep (we sometimes see old things and go 'Oh I could never get rid of this' and then throw it away))

Sorry for the rambling, But you'll see why some of this is important to know.

Basically, We were getting our shit together for the garage sale, And invited over a mutual friend of ours, Who I'll call uhhh Ley (16F). Shes kind of obsessed with the LGBTQ and loves to help people 'realize' they're gay or trans or non-binary. By this I mean she'll literally bully people she 'knows' is gay or trans by always telling them they are and spreading rumors about them saying they are. The way she 'knows' these things are from gut feelings. I thought maybe she needed friends who would be honest with her and tell her gently that it needed to stop. She stopped being so bad with it and we even convinced her to admit to the rumors she started being fake. We've known her for around 3 years now, And she's stopped doing it as aggressively for 2 of those years. She still makes jabs and 'jokes' saying things like "Oh thats so girly, Are you sure you're not trans?" and "Oh thats such a boy thing to do, Are you a lesbian?", Both quotes she's said to me and my brother less than a week ago. I am straight and cis, So is my brother. We have nothing against the lgbt, We just aren't apart of it. We support the lgbtq as much as possible (with my part time job I like to donate some of my paycheck towards point of pride so people who need the surgeries or binders can get them), And are very open about supporting them.

While we were cleaning out my brothers room and finding stuff to throw into the 'sell' box (we like to do precleaning before our parents help us, It makes everything faster and less work on the people trying to help), And Ley found my brothers kilt. She did a long exaggerated gasp, Looking at my brother.

"So, How long have you been trans? Why didn't you tell me?? I knew it the whole time!"

My brother tried to explain that it was a kilt for men, And he wasn't trans, But she kept interrupting him saying crap like 'you don't have to lie I know now' and 'Its nothing to be embarrassed about, I knew ever since you started to sew'. The last straw for me was when she continued not listening to him and started to ask about how he was gonna come out as school. I yelled at her to get out, That neither of us were gay, Neither of us are trans, And neither of us are apart of any of the lgbtq. We are allies and nothing more. She tried to argue that he had a 'skirt' which OBVIOUSLY meant he was trans, I basically screamed at her that she was a stupid know it all who made everyone who wasn't apart of the lgbtq's life hell because she made sure everyone knew them as someone they arent (I know, I shouldn't of brought up 2 years in the past) and that I was tired of her trying to force everyone to be in the LGBTQ when its just not realistic. Not everyone is gay or trans, Some people are cis and straight. She started crying and left, We haven't spoken in a few days but I think I'm justified. I'm tired of living my life being told I'm something I'm not, I'm tired of seeing it happen to my brother too.

My brother later thanked me for standing up for him, Telling me it made him really upset when she said those things. To cheer him up we watched his favorite movies and I made him his favorite dinner (mom and dad both work day jobs so we both make lunch and dinner)

And for those who are gonna say that allies are apart of the LGBTQ I strongly believe the A is for aro/ace. Being an ally isn't a gender or sexuality

(unless people identify using ally/allyself of course or whatever it is, I'm not quite sure how neos work or whatever but I love to see how creative people get with it and am happy it gives people who don't identify with any of the normalized(? Idk the correct term but yknow the man woman and nb) genders a chance to be who they actually are)

Extra info on why I think I could be the asshole: I feel like we might've been able to explain it if we got her to shut up for a minute, But she kept talking over us. I feel like I went too far by insulting her, And I feel like I might be TA because she's also autistic (so is my brother though, And I have ADHD).

Why I think I'm NTA: My brother is really quiet and doesn't really defend himself often. He doesn't really know how to stand up for himself and is 'easy' to talk over (soft spoken, Quiet talking voice and nonconfrontational) which is why I believe I had to step in in his place, And I don't believe I did anything wrong defending my brother and making her stop calling him what hes not.

Anyways. AITA for yelling at our friend that my brother isn't trans?

To see later: PINK PANTHER

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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endless-ineffabilities · 6 months

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there's hope for us yet - (2/2)

Anakin Skywalker x f!reader

The reader realizes that her true Anakin will always exist, in some spark or another, however miniscule. And she reconciles with what she must do in order to get him back.

masterlist ▪︎ part one

GIF by nerdside

When your eyes open once more, you're lying on something soft.

A sense of familiarity eases in as your fingertips glide on the silk sheets underneath you. And that scent. Which can only be...

"What were you dreaming about?"

Your head falls to the side, slowly, dreading what you'll see. Because you know, without a doubt, it's all going to break your heart.

Anakin lies on his side, with his torso bare and his head propped up on one sturdy arm, looking at you all starry-eyed.

Like he always had.

You can help but let out a shaky sigh. Why did I have to lose this? Why did I have to lose you?

He notices the switch in your expression. And as if he's heard your thoughts, he whispers, "I'm here, stardust. I'm never leaving you."

But you did.

You sit up halfway, and find yourself saying, "What about all that you said? About Senator Palpatine? If you... if you truly believe that, Ani, then I could... " I could lose you. Your words echo in your head. He must have heard them to be meaningless ploys.

"You don't understand, stardust. I'm doing this for us. For you! This way, we can be together forever. Nothing can take you from me."

You lean forward, gripping his hand tightly. "Nothing will, Ani. Your visions won't come into fruition. You're not gonna get rid of me that easy, you know." You smirk at him to assuage his concerns, but his frown stays in place.

You massage your thumb in between his ruffled brows, in a show of easing the tension in his expression. "I love you," you breathe.

"I love you, stardust," he says, his voice breaking with emotion. He presses his forehead to yours. And then, his lips on your own.

His breathing is heavy, his mouth frantic. His hair falls forward, casting shadows on the sharp angles of his face.

I love you, he keeps saying. Though he claims your lips again and again, before you can get the chance to say it back.

Your fingers tangle in his unruly blonde tresses, anchoring themselves as he slides down and nips at your collarbone. His hand dips inside your blouse, gently pawing at your chest.

When he looks up at you with his mischievous smirk, you nearly forget where you are. You want to.

"Ani..."

I want this to be real.

"It is real," Anakin responds without missing a beat. He lowers himself further, hands gripping your hips. His fingers trace a line underneath the waistband of your trousers. "Give in to me, my stardust. This can be as real as we want it to be."

"Now is not the time..." Your words halt when he presses his lips to your hipbone.

"Why not?" Anakin purrs, then proceeds anyway. His breathing is warm against your skin, as he carefully starts to undo your trousers.

It certainly feels real. Any world, any reality - Anakin Skywalker will always have the ability to set you afire.

Your stomach is in knots, in equal parts excitement and anxiety. You want to focus on him and only him, but your gaze is directed towards the ceiling. Or lack thereof. All you see is an apparent simulation of the night sky, with thick gray clouds to reveal a storm simmering and waiting to unfold.

You were so caught up in Anakin that you failed to notice your surroundings.

"Where are we, Anakin? This isn't your suite."

He sighs, shaking his head. "That's what you're thinking about?"

Lightning flashes overhead. Dread rips into you as it casts a glow above everything. It had been only for a split second, but it was enough.

The sky glowed red. You see much clearer now.

"Let me take your mind off it, stardust." Anakin had pulled himself up suddenly, covering your line of sight. Everything, like always, is just him.

He grips your jaw in one hand, forcing you to look right at him.

"Anakin..." your voice is a low warning him. You notice how it sounded more of a question. Your guard is up, your hands bunched up into fists at your sides, no longer lovingly pressed against him. Suddenly, the comforting feel of the silk sheets feels like a betrayal. A lie.

"Kiss me," Anakin purrs. His lips take yours, roughly. His teeth clashing against yours in the movement. "This is all I want. You're all that I want." He grows frustrated when you don't kiss him back. Almost rabid. One hand keeps your face against him, while the other freely roams all over your body. His fingernails dig into the flesh of your thighs. "Say you're mine."

"No," you struggle to take a breath, squirming underneath his solid form. "You wanted something more. And now you have it."

"Because of you," he implores. "I did everything for you."

"I never wanted you to cross over into the dark side." Rage is evident in your shaking voice. You find your strength and propel yourself from underneath him, footsteps carrying you away from the bed. He follows suit but you put your hand up. "Stop." He doesn't listen. When has he ever?

For me? How dare he blame me?

Anakin reaches you once more, looking pained. That familiar frustrated furrow in his brow making him look youthful. Almost vulnerable.

Like that brazen young Padawan whom you met a long time ago. The one you fell in love with.

You wait for him to speak. To begin his tirade. He was fuming just a minute ago, surely he has some lovely things to share. About the past. About what you lost. What he sacrificed it all for.

The new Empire. Palpatine. Darth Vader.

Each one a dagger right through your heart. Reminding yourself that he did not choose you.

But he was lost.

You shake your head at your resolve breaking. One look at his broken expression and it all falls down.

He was lost. He was manipulated.

"Forgive me, stardust." Anakin says. His forehead presses against yours, and he holds you close. The makeshift sky above you seemingly calms, no longer displaying the occassional flash of crimson red. You feel the tension leave your body, and nearly slump against him.

A minute passes before he finally speaks again, "I never meant to hurt you. I never meant for any of this."

You know full well that he apologizes for much more than causing you to grow irate moments ago. He means everything.

"I know," you finally admit. Your eyes flit over his features. His eyes gently shut, his fingertips memorizing the planes of your face. "But this... this was the end."

"Well," he slowly smiles, and it is one of both sadness and acceptance. But when his eyes hold yours, it betrays the Anakin that would never accept defeat, who would never relent to losing the one he loves forever. "Why don't we go back to the beginning?"

The scene fades before your eyes, but Anakin remains.

And he always will.

It is the day after your thirteenth nameday, and your Master has granted you leave for the entire week.

It gives you the chance to interact with the visiting Padawans from other Jedi Temples, but you find yourself sitting all alone in an alcove in the inner courtyard.

Training has not been easy as of late, and you're beginning to doubt whether you deserve to be in the Jedi Order at all.

Lost in thought, you make the hilt of your lightsaber hover to the side. Spinning it midair. Tapping it against the stone in a sporadic rhythm.

Maybe if I fail, I can make a living off of these party tricks.

Then a voice breaks you out of it. "That won't be much of a living, but I have a better idea."

The boy you will soon know to be Anakin stands there, with his sandy mop of hair along with its signature Padawan braid, and curious gaze. He looks to be about your age, but already much taller.

"Stay out of my head." You respond on instinct, letting annoyance win over.

"Don't you want to know what I had in mind?" He sits across from you, unfazed. Clearly this is a kid who holds himself in some high regard. His force feels like determination and honour.

And defiance, as well as a simmering fury, but you will find this out much later.

"Not really," you shrug, trying to play coy. Your interest is piqued, but you're still discomforted by the thought that this random Padawan is tuning in to your deepest emotions.

"Well," he sighs. Something tells you it didn't really matter what your response was. "I was thinking that I can help you train. I can feel that the Force is strong with you, as it is with me."

"Is it, now?" The pair on this guy. But he's right. He has the power to bring balance to the galaxy. He just doesn't believe it yet.

"It is. And trust me, I tend to be right about these things." He smiles, and it is one of boyish innocence and wonder. Years later, he will change, but you will find that his smile remains the same.

You shake his hand in introduction, and you fall into conversation. How long is he visiting your Jedi Temple? Where did he come from? How is he finding his training?

It's polite conversation. It's a normal afternoon.

But it's also the beginning of everything.

"Come find me," he says to you, before he leaves.

"I will."

As he walks away, you notice a cloud of smoke encroaching upon him. White tendrils twisting in a race to get to him. Anakin. You blink hard, trying to get clear of the haze. His figure is morphed, doubled in size. Something's not right.

The white tendrils turn red. Darkness creeps in from all sides, and you know there is danger here.

"Wait!" You scream out. I have to warn him.

You take sure, long strides toward his figure and your bones ache. You're certainly taller now, and stronger. Much older than your thirteen years.

"Anakin, wait!"

He turns, and it is not Anakin. You freeze upon seeing the unfamiliar being, towering over everything, dark mask firmly in place.

Darth Vader. You realize just where you are, and why you're here, running around moments of impermanence.

He starts to speak, and you're startled to hear that the voice does not come from Vader's deep, chilling synthesizer.

"Come find me," he repeats. It's Anakin's voice. The one you've always known.

"I will," you say once more, the meaning of the words renewed.

And then everything is lost in a blinding flash of light.

You find yourself back on the suspended path, amidst millions of the same pathways to memories and forms of reality. The galaxy stretches eternal, the stars unending.

Anakin stands calmly before you, as he did when you arrived.

"You have to go back, stardust. Ahsoka needs you."

"I know," you say, not willing to say goodbye, but there's no other choice. You take his hands, committing the feeling to memory, and he rests his forehead against yours.

"Will you come find me?"

taglist: @maggiecc @fandomwarrior98 @irishbl0ss0mz @sarahbutnot @anerdypanda @valsarchives @avitute @standwithcap @lwkaslvt @yourusername1 @queenv319 @hesvoid3434 @caramelcandescence @eykismyfav @maratheidiot22 @leahthesith @hestia-fires @geekygirl127 @solaceinwritings @hueanhdang

"I always will."

#anakin skywalker x reader #anakin skywalker imagine #anakin skywalker #star wars #hayden christensen

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bluebeary-jay · 10 months

Text

Midnight kisses

Joel Miller x f!Reader

Summary: Jackson celebrates the New Year’s Eve, and you're thinking about finally confessing to your crush how much you like him. but Joel Miller, the object of your affections, might have other plans in mind. (based on this adorable request!!)

Tags: FLUFF my beloved 🥰, Joel is very flirty in this one, lots of crushinggg, just old sweet mutual pining (also they're both lovesick idiots)

Warnings: mentions of alcohol and being drunk, jealousy, age difference

Word count: 5.4K

A/N: i had a lot of fun with this one 🥰 thank you so much once again for the request, dear, i hope you'll like what i came up with. (btw this was supposed to be a short fic but it seems i'm unable to write one 😔) still i hope yall will like it and as always, happy reading!! 💕

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝 𓆟𓆝 𓆟 𓆞

The party was in a full swing.

You didn’t expect anything else from the Jackson community. Ever since you arrived here, you were astounded by the effort that the people living in this small town were making to create a life as normal and joyous as possible – for their children and themselves. And today, on New Year’s Eve, they outdid themselves. There was food, music and drinks – almost as if the apocalypse outside those walls never happened.

You were sitting by one of the tables, sipping on your beverage while you waited for your friend, Angie, to arrive. Dancing alone didn’t sound like an appealing idea, so while you waited for her, you opted for some people-watching – though if you were honest with yourself, it was more like ‘person-watching’.

Your eyes strayed to a figure on the opposite side of the room for like a twentieth time, but you couldn’t help it even if you wanted to. Because there stood a man who still, even after more than a year of knowing him, made the butterflies in your stomach take flight.

Joel Miller.

He looked really good in a clean flannel and fitting jeans, you conceded. His hair was slightly wet, like he washed it just before coming to the party, and combed a little to the back, making the silver strands in his hair and beard shine in the low lights. You found yourself unable to look away or get rid of that stupid grin on your face that lingered when Joel smiled lopsidedly at something his brother said. The muscles in his arm bulged when he lifted his glass to take a sip, and you watched the lines of his neck when his throat bobbed...

“You’re ogling,” murmured a voice next to your ear, and you jumped a little in surprise. Next to you stood Angie, smirking at you.

“Jesus, Angie.” You put your hand on your chest, your heart pounding rapidly. “A ’hello’ would be nice.”

Your friend knew, of course, about your massive crush on Joel Miller, and you thought more than a year of pining on your part would cause her to grow bored of all the jokes and teasing that she threw your way. Apparently, you were wrong.

“Hello,” she said, then sat down on the other chair and leaned closer to you with a wide smile. “You’re ogling. In a room full of people, may I add.”

“I’m not,” you murmured defensibly, but your face grew warm at the realization that she caught you. “How long have you been standing here, anyway?”

“Like half a minute. By the way, you’re also drooling.”

“I’m not!” you repeated, now in an irritated whisper. You knew you weren’t drooling, but still had to refrain yourself from wiping your mouth, not wanting to give her the satisfaction. “Stop making things up.”

“You should just go talk to him.” Angie casually nodded in Joel’s direction. “He didn’t come with a date, sooo…”

“That doesn’t mean anything. Maybe he’s waiting for someone.”

“Uh, duh!” Angie flicked you on the forehead, and you hissed. “For you to make a move. You can… oh, I know!” she bounced in her seat excitedly and clapped her hands. “Ask him to dance with you!”

You almost snorted. “Joel Miller dancing? Sure. He wouldn’t agree even if he did like me.”

“He does like you. Jesus, you flirt with each other all the time.” The smile disappeared from her lips and she rolled her eyes. “Honestly, you’d have to be blind and deaf not to notice. And maybe dead.”

“There’s no flirting, I told you.” You took a sip of your drink, glancing at the object of your affection. “He talks in this way to everyone.”

“He never called me ‘darling’,” Angie retorted. “Or gave me his jacket when we got caught up in the rain.”

You smiled softly at the memory, but that just made you feel even more hopeless, because since that day, you weren’t able to have a normal conversation with the man you liked so much.

“What do I do?” you whined, leaning on the table. “He’s so beautiful. And he for sure doesn’t see me that way.”

“Are you drunk already? You said you didn’t want a repeat from–”

“–from last year, yeah,” you finished for her and sighed. “I’m not drunk, just feeling down. There’s no way I’ll be able to tell him I like him, Angie.”

“Maybe you won’t have to.” Your friend nudged you gently. “You can just inconspicuously take him under one of the mistletoe and go ‘oh, what’s that?’, and then…”

“What mistletoe?” you asked, only now looking up at the ceiling where familiar-looking leaves were tied with a string to the support beams under the ceiling and above the doors. “Why is there mistletoe hanging?” you asked skeptically. “It’s a New Year’s Eve party.”

“I think they haven’t taken it down since last week.” Angie shrugged, but then grinned at you. “Don’t you think it’s a sign, though? So many places to kiss your crush under~...”

“Jesus, keep your voice down,” you groaned, hiding your face in your hands again. “You’re impossible.”

“You’re impossible,” she mocked in a low voice. “I’m trying to help.”

“I know, babe,” you whined, and sighed heavily again. “You know what, maybe I should just forget it. Let’s go have fun, dance, and later throw up from all the food and…”

Suddenly, Angie interrupted you with a high noise in her throat. You gave her a questioning look and she looked at you with a tight-lipped smile and wide eyes.

“He’s coming here.”

“What?!” You automatically turned around before Angie hissed for you not to look, and sure enough, there was Joel Miller, making his way through the crowd with his eyes locked on you. “Oh my god,” you breathed, clutching at your friend’s hand. “He must’ve seen us talking. What do I do?”

“You sit there and look smoking hot, and let him flirt with you,” she answered with confidence you didn’t feel. “And maybe you won’t even need to ask for the kiss, maybe he’ll do it for–” Her eyes darted above your shoulder. “Oh, hey, Miller.”

You gulped and took a deep breath before turning around and– oh, God, he looked even better up close.

Angie kicked you lightly under the table when you didn’t say anything, and you cleared your throat, smiling up at the man you were so crazy about. “Uhm, hi, Jo– Mr Miller.”

“Didn’t I tell you to call me by my name, sugar?” He had kind of a boyish smile on his face that made him look younger and even more handsome, which in turn made your stomach fill with warmth. He sat down next to you, and his eyes scanned you down and back up, slowly, lingering on your legs and curves just for a second longer. “You look lovely.” He then glanced at Angie, sending her a nod. “Both of you.”

“Really?” you beamed, and Angie kicked your ankle again, making you wince. “Uhm, thanks. You clean up nicely yourself.”

A trace of smirk ran across his face, but it was gone before you could make sure it was really there in the first place.

“Are you enjoyin’ the party?” he asked casually, hiding one hand in the front pocket of his jeans. Your eyes followed his movement before you caught yourself.

“Y-yeah, it’s nice. A little too loud for me, but really nice.”

“Maybe you wanna step outside for a bit, then?” Joel nodded in the direction of the deck in the back, and your heart started beating faster.

Did he want to be alone with you? Or was just being polite and preferred to talk somewhere quieter, and you were getting your hopes up unnecessarily? You hoped it was the first, that he genuinely enjoyed chatting with you as much as you did with him – but you never knew with a man like Joel Miller. He was an enigma, sometimes serious and so stoic that you couldn’t for the world figure out what was going on in his head, and other times charming and teasing, making you weak in the knees when he was looking at you with that fiery glint in his eyes…

“Sugar?” Joel asked, lifting his eyebrows with what seemed to be amusement, and you cursed yourself mentally for spacing out.

“Sorry, I… Yes, let’s– sure, let’s go.”

All of you stood up and you looked over your shoulder at Angie with a panicked face, but instead of reassuring you, she sent you a quick, sly grin.

“You two go ahead,” she chirped. “I’m gonna go look for my date.”

“Angie–” you whispered, giving her a look, but the woman just winked and turned around, disappearing into the crowd of dancing people. “Angie!”

Before you could go after her, you felt a big, warm hand on the small of your back, and your entire body tensed. Joel leaned over to your ear, whispering in a low voice.

“Shall we?”

“Yeah,” you squealed, so quietly he probably didn’t hear it over the loud music. “Sure.”

Your legs moved on their own, going where he guided you. The walk to the terrace in the back lasted no longer than fifteen seconds, but it felt like hours had passed. You were very aware of the light pressure of his fingertips on your back, with only one layer of material separating your skin from his, and the nerves of feeling him so close behind you were making you walk stiffly and oddly – though, miraculously, he didn’t seem to notice.

“I don’t like how loud the music is, either,” Joel said after you two exited the main room, and he closed the door. Then he glanced at you again, his eyes flicking to your bare legs just for a second longer. “Are you cold?”

“No,” you answered truthfully. Not only was it nice to feel the cool air after sitting in a stuffy room with a crowd of people for so long, but also you still felt warm from Joel’s closeness. “I’m alright.” Joel nodded absentmindedly, and you squinted. “Did you want to talk about something or…”

“Nah, just wanted to escape for a minute.” He rubbed his beard and shrugged, but there was tightness to his body language. “Not much to do in there except for drinkin’.”

“And dancing,” you cut in.

Joel glanced at you, and the lazy smirk returned onto his features.

“You like to dance, sweet girl?” he asked, and you felt your face growing hot when you heard his tone. Low, drawling and oh, so delicious.

“If the party is good, yes, I guess so.” Then you remembered what Angie suggested earlier, and you took a shaky breath, mustering all the courage you had in you. “We… if you want, we could dance a little later, if they play something nice…?”

But the hot nerves in your chest turned to cold disappointment when Joel started to shake his head with a chuckle. “Nah, darlin’. Sorry, I don’t… I’m no dancer.”

“Noone here is,” you retorted, a bit hurt by how quick his rejection was. “It’s just for fun.”

“I know better ways to have fun than t’make an idiot of myself in front of bunch of people.”

“Like what?”

Of course, you just had to ask.

Joel smirked, as if he was just waiting for it, and took a step forward, forcing you to take one backwards. His brown eyes bored into yours, making you weak in your knees, and you promptly turned your gaze away, not able to withstand the tension in the air. With a cough, you walked up to the wooden railing, pretending that you weren’t feeling sheepish at all.

“For one, talkin’ here with you is fun enough for me.”

You forced yourself to look at Joel when you heard it, just to see if he’s joking, but the man appeared genuine. He leaned against the rails, his hand right next to your shoulder, and you couldn’t get rid of the thought of how easy it’d be for him to cage you in this spot with his strong arms, how he’d make your entire body tremble…

But you weren’t quite sure yet if he was being sweet or just tried to mess with you, so you decided that a teasing response would be the best course of action.

“I don’t know.” You shrugged lightly. “I’d still like to find someone to dance with tonight.”

At that, Joel’s hand gripped the railing tighter and his body stiffened. You had to hide a triumphant smirk on your face, pleased that you managed to throw him off his game – whatever it was that he was playing.

“One of your friends?” In your peripheral vision you saw him lifting his eyebrows with the faintest of scowls. “Or one of those shady guys sittin’ at the bar, staring at pretty girls like you? ’Cause they’re no good for you, darlin’.”

“Oh, really?” you scoffed and lifted your chin, feeling touched that Joel was acting so protective – (and maybe even… jealous?) – about what you said. “You were the one that didn’t want to dance. What do you know about what’s good for me, anyway?”

“Those guys won’t treat you right. They just want a girl to spend the night with, and you deserve better than that.”

He was right, of course, but it didn’t mean you were going to openly give him his due. You made an acknowledging noise, not really sure what to say, but Joel didn’t seem to mind. He continued in a quiet, raspy voice that sent shivers down your spine. “You deserve someone who’d take real good care of you, darlin’. Not some drunk out of their ass idiot.”

“Are you drunk, Mr Miller?” you asked, not looking at him in fear he’ll see how red his words made you, though you could still see his smirk in the corner of your eye.

“No.”

“You act like you are.”

“C’mon, sugar, look at me.” He took your chin between his fingers and your body went rigid. His warm gaze met yours for just a second, and he tilted his head forward a little. “Do I look drunk?”

“A little.” You turned your head away, but he tsked and guided your chin back.

“In the eyes, darlin’.” You gulped at his words, and his dark, brown irises twinkled in the fairy lights dangling from the roof and walls. “And call me Joel, please.”

His chest was almost touching yours, and you felt the wooden railing digging into your lower back, but at that moment you didn’t mind at all. Joel was so close, and your breath hitched in your throat when you got enveloped in his earthy smell, with a tinge of bonfire and… was that cologne? For some reason the discovery that he used cologne for tonight made your heart flutter.

But as much as you loved every second of being so close to him, you remembered that you weren’t alone on the terrace. There was a pair of people talking – well, now kissing, judging by the sound of it – and your eyes darted to the side to see if they were looking at you both. “Come on, there are people here. It’s not…”

The man clicked his tongue in disapproval and moved slightly closer, now practically pinning you against the railing with his body, and you squealed unwillingly when he, once again, made you look at him.

“Eyes on me.”

And God, if it wasn’t the sexiest thing you’ve ever seen or heard. It was unfair how much power his gaze and tone wielded over you.

“Okay,” you managed to whimper, and the corner of his mouth curled upwards, creating that adorable dimple in his cheek.

“And my name, sugar.”

You didn't know why you were complying so easily, but something about the softness and tenderness in his voice made you feel safe. He wouldn’t hurt you, of that you were absolutely sure.

“Okay, Joel.”

His thumb brushed the edge of your bottom lip with the softest of touches, making your legs almost turn to jelly. It made you want to say his name again, though in a much more needy tone.

“That’s a good girl,” Joel murmured with a smirk, never looking away.

Lord, have mercy.

You were so grateful for the wooden rails behind your back, because you were sure you’d collapse any second now if he kept looking at you like that.

“I… Joel…”

“Tell me if you’re uncomfortable,” he murmured without taking his eyes off of you for even a second. Your brain was mush at this point, but even if you could formulate any words, you doubt you’d ask him to step away. So you settled on shaking your head slightly, to which Joel nodded. “Lemme know immediately if it changes, darlin’.”

How could you be so blind? All you could think about was that Angie was right – there was no way Joel Miller wasn’t flirting with you. Maybe he even liked you. Maybe – just maybe – he wanted to kiss you just as much as you wanted to kiss him.

“Didn’t you wanna… get back to the party?”

You didn’t make any move to get away yourself, however, not wanting him to drop the arm with which he was holding your chin. The material of his shirt was bulging over the lines of his biceps, and it felt really nice to stand so close to him.

“I’m in no rush.” Joel’s voice dipped, and your insides tightened. “You?”

“No, but–”

“Here you are, you ol’ fucker!”

Joel took a step back, and you both turned to see his younger brother walking clumsily through the door with a big, drunken grin on his face. You cleared your throat, still breathless and blushed, but both Millers didn’t pay you any mind anymore.

“Tommy.” Joel’s face was like made out of stone, but his eyes were betraying how irritated he was with the interruption.

“You thought you’d manage to get away, ya old dog?” Tommy hooked an arm around his older brother’s shoulders and finally looked at you to send you a wink. “Sorry, sweetheart, gotta borrow ‘im for a second. He has a date to get to.”

It took you a couple of seconds to register that yes, you heard him right. A heavy veil of hurt and disbelief slowly fell down on you, and your eyes started to prickle as you looked from Tommy to Joel.

“A date?”

He had a date. Why then did he talk and act this way with you, making you feel like you ever had a chance with him?

“C’mon, don’t keep a lady waiting,” Tommy said to Joel instead of answering you, and tugged the other man back inside, but Joel didn’t move. “Who knows, maybe you’ll even get lucky tonight!”

That you couldn’t listen to.

Trying to hide how painful his words were to you, you ducked your head and tried to slip past the brothers, desperate to get out of here. A hand – which felt so achingly familiar now – shot out and grabbed your elbow before you could escape. You lifted your tearful eyes only to meet Joel’s sorrowful ones.

“Darlin’, wait. It’s not…”

“No, it’s okay,” you interrupted him, tearing your gaze away. “I wanted to go to the bathroom, anyway.”

Joel looked like he wanted to say something else, but you couldn’t bear being in his and Tommy’s presence any longer. You slipped out of his grasp, quickly coming back inside and navigating your way to the bathrooms.

He had a date for tonight. And still he flirted with you and touched you so lovingly, and… and almost…

Stupid. Stupid, stupid, stupid! To think you ever had a chance.

You dashed into the bathroom and quickly opened the first free stall you saw, then shut it behind you. There you just slumped against the wall and wrapped your arms around yourself, giving in to the flow of your tears, but trying not to make a sound.

You felt so foolish for letting yourself fall under Joel Miller’s spell, for ignoring that he obviously couldn’t be interested in someone like you.

He probably saw you as a dumb child. No wonder he’d prefer someone else, probably a woman closer to his own age.

But why did he have to be so cruel, to lead you on and hint that…

No, you realized. It was your own damn fault for letting your heart justify his every action towards you.

Almost ten minutes must’ve passed before you got a grip on yourself and decided to go find Angie. You needed to talk to someone, preferably distract yourself from the unpleasant situation you had to experience, and maybe try to salvage the evening somehow. With that in mind you took a couple of breaths, wiped your eyes and then hesitantly exited the bathroom.

You only managed to take a couple of steps, however, before your eyes were drawn to a familiar and beautiful side profile. You wished you didn’t know his face so well, because then you wouldn’t see Joel whispering something to a stunning woman you didn’t know at the far end of the room. She was hanging off his arm, bright eyes and a million-dollars smile directed solely at him. Joel appeared to be looking around, but a few seconds later he put his hand on the small of the woman’s back – just as he did earlier with you – and started walking. Neither of them looked your way before exiting through the front door and leaving the party.

As well as a gaping hole in your heart.

*****

A few minutes later you managed to find Angie. You were a mess at this point, barely able to stop yourself from sobbing. It was truly pathetic.

“I don’t know her name. But I saw them leaving, and she was hanging off his arm and–” you choked on your words and gave a humorless laugh. “God, I’m such an idiot.”

“I’m so sorry, hon.” Angie looked at you sadly. “We can ditch the party if you want. Go to my place and watch some movies,” she suggested gently, but you were already shaking your head.

“No, no. I’m fine, really, I… I think I'll just go home. But you should stay with your girlfriend.” Angie looked like she was about to protest, but you squeezed her hand reassuringly. “I promise I’m okay. I’m just gonna go straight back home and lock myself inside with a bowl of ice-cream. Or go to sleep.”

“I don’t think you should be alone right now.”

“I… I think I need to.” You gave her a weak, sad smile, and stood up. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow, okay? You have fun, I don’t want to ruin your night, too.”

“You’re not ruining anythi–”

“I mean… this. All of this stuff with,” you swallowed heavily, “him.”

Angie still seemed unconvinced, but finally nodded after a while. “Alright. But come and get me if you feel worse.”

“I promise. Love you.”

“Love you, too. Take care of yourself, okay?”

You nodded, then went towards the side exit and out into the snowy night without looking back. You didn’t want to stay here and watch as all those happy couples share sweet kisses at midnight, thus reminding you of your heartbreak.

This time you had your coat on, but it was far too thin for this kind of weather. You wrapped it tighter around yourself and hid your hands in the pockets, starting to make your way home. It was a bit far from the main square, but you needed to get away from the music and laughter of the partygoers as quickly as possible.

Alas, you only managed to walk one street away when out of nowhere, a big hand grabbed your elbow, stopping you in your tracks. “Wait.”

You turned around and took a step backwards at the same time, freeing your arm with a strong tug. The words full of anger were ready to spill out of your mouth, but that was until you saw who stood in front of you with a painful expression.

The last person you expected to see here.

“Joel?” You whispered surprisedly and looked around, but there was no one else nearby. Not that strange woman you saw him with, at least. “What are you doing here?”

“I was lookin’ for you,” he rasped between gasps, like he ran all the way here. “You weren’t at the party.”

“Why were you… What are you doing here?” you repeated more coldly, the sight of him only making your fresh heartache so much more noticeable. “I thought you left.”

“M’so sorry.” Joel’s beautiful dark eyes were full of sadness and weariness. “I would have never left you if I could help it, darlin’.”

He took half a step forward and lifted his hand slightly to graze yours with his icy-cold fingertips. You weren’t wearing any gloves either, so his touch sent a jolt up your arm. You looked down at it, but gently moved your hand away. “I don’t understand. Didn’t you have a… date?”

“No.” He sighed and rubbed his eyes, shaking his head. You avoided his eyes and instead watched as snowflakes landed and melted in his hair. “No, it was Tommy… You saw how drunk he was, and he wanted to set me up, insisted on talking to that girl, but I…”

“You should get back to her, then,” you said dryly, really not having strength to even hide how hurtful his mere presence was. You went past him, hiding your neck in your coat. “I don’t want to keep you from–”

“Darlin’, wait.” Joel grabbed your arm again, though still gently and without any force. “Listen, she was nice, but I told her that I can’t get involved in anythin’, because I…” He faltered slightly when you looked him in the eyes, for the first time since your talk on the terrace. “There is… it’s– fuck.” He shut his eyes and took a deep breath, as if gathering courage. “There is someone else,” he finally spoke, his voice almost trembling, and looked at you again, “that I’m madly in love with. And it’s you.”

Through the open door to the party someone shouted what sounded like the time, but it was all happening in the background of your mind. All you could focus on was Joel, standing so close to you and looking almost scared as he waited for your reaction.

Cold crept up your limbs and up to your cheeks while you tried to digest what the hell you just heard, but as if held by the invisible force of his gaze, you couldn’t move an inch.

“...what?”

“I… really, really like you,” Joel whispered, his dark and sad eyes drilling into your unbelieving ones. “I went to this party just to see you, darlin’. And I’d never chose to spend the evenin’ with anyone else but you. I’m so sorry I left you like that and…”

He then gulped and very slowly lifted his hand to your face, not fully cupping your cheek but hovering just above it. He searched your eyes, but when you didn’t back away, he touched your skin carefully, and an involuntary sigh escaped you as your eyes fluttered closed.

You never thought one could be touched with such care and fondness. No one has ever treated you like that before, like you were made of the most precious glass.

“You can tell me to fuck off,” Joel whispered, and you opened your eyes to find his face a little closer than before. “I just thought that maybe… if you would maybe, too…”

He was getting flustered again, and it was the most adorable thing you’ve ever seen. It must’ve been close to midnight now, because you noticed that the music stopped and the racket inside the building was at its peak, though it was hard to distinguish the words people were shouting when your heartbeat was almost deafening in your ears.

“But I saw you leaving with that woman.” You had to make sure you were on the same page with him before you did something idiotic. Again. “You aren’t…?”

“No,” Joel breathed a quiet chuckle and tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear, while his eyes danced across your face. “It’s only ever been you, darlin’.”

Then he must’ve heard something – his head turned to the side to look at where the party was still going on, before his eyes returned to you, and you felt his thumb swiping your cheek in an oh, so tender manner.

“May I?” he asked in a whisper, so close that his breath skimmed your parted lips. You hoped he was asking about what you thought, but this time wasn’t brave enough to ask and clarify.

So you just nodded.

And Joel leaned in, without any hurry, and kissed you.

It was fitting, you supposed, that only a couple of seconds later the clock chimed midnight, and shrieks of laughter and cheers filled the air while the people still present at the party celebrated loudly. You couldn’t care less, however, because in that moment, your entire world was Joel. His – still cold – hand caressed your scorching cheek, and the other found its place on your hip. The smell of him, the warmth with which his body radiated, and the feeling of his lips, rougher in touch than you’ve imagined, but still soft in movement – all of it together was almost overwhelming.

You parted after a while with blissful sighs, though didn’t move away – Joel still held you close, his forehead pressed to yours, and eyes shut tightly, as if he was in pain. He took a trembling breath when you touched his jaw with your icy fingers.

“Tell me to stop,” he pleaded in a murmur, taking you aback. “Sugar, if you don’t… Please, tell me to stop.”

You shook your head and held onto him tighter before he even finished.

“Please, don’t stop.”

Your lips clashed again, tongues meeting and dancing together, and it was the closest you’ve ever felt to any type of heaven in this cruel, forsaken world. Joel pulled you flush against him and kissed you again, more forcefully this time, tangling his fingers in your hair. You let out an involuntary moan, but his mouth swallowed the sound immediately, not giving you a split second of respite.

“I wanted to do it a year ago,” Joel muttered between the kisses, before he took your face in his hands to look you in the eyes properly. He smiled, that same adorable and boyish smile, when he saw how breathless and flushed you were. “Wanted to kiss you so much, sugar, but,” he obviously fought back a laugh at this point, his eyes crinkling, “you got wasted and puked your guts out just before midnight.”

“Oh my god.” You didn’t know he saw it, particularly the moment when all the alcohol you consumed a year ago refused to stay in your stomach. “I wasn’t– I don’t usually… I got drunk ‘cause I saw Sheryll kissing you on the cheek,” you admitted with embarrassment, feeling your skin growing even hotter. “I thought you and her were together at that point…”

“But why did you get drunk because of it, sweet girl?” Joel mused, brushing his nose against yours and obviously teasing you. You snorted and shook your head.

“You know why.”

“I want to hear it from you.”

You playfully pushed him away lightly, but he tightened his grip around you, not letting you step away.

“You’re an asshole sometimes,” you whispered, making Joel chuckle. “Fine. I really wanted to kiss you, too. Happy?”

He smiled and kissed you again, softly and passionately this time, cradling your cheek in his palm.

“Very,” he whispered against your lips and dragged his nose up to plant a kiss on your forehead. “Very much, baby.”

Your heart fluttered with joy at his affectionate tone. Joel pulled away, his hands leaving your body to cover your own, situated on his jaw and arm.

“Now, what do you say we head back inside?” he asked with a disarming smile, brushing your knuckles with his thumbs. “And maybe you’ll let me ask you for a dance?”

You didn’t give an answer, but the joyous kiss you pressed to his lips – which, with your enthusiasm, almost made both of you topple over into the snow – spoke for itself.

#joel miller x reader #pedro pascal #joel miller #pedro pascal x reader #the last of us #joel miller x you #joel miller x y/n #the last of us fanfiction #joel tlou #joel miller fluff

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goldustwomun · 2 months

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all of me wants all of you (s.b.)

pairing: sirius black x younger potter!reader

summary: something about your relationship with sirius black had never sit quite right with you, and now that he's back after two years of travelling the world, you're beginning to think that you'll soon find out what'll happens if the two of you finally fall over the edge of whatever precipice you've been teetering close to all these years. plus, you've got to work with him all summer, so what's the worst that could happen?

warnings: angst so much angst, some healing as well, hugs from a concerned mother, more angst, more angst, fluff?, actual communication omg, do you ever meet someone's eyes and just one look from them has you breaking down and bawling, yeah :) , not proofread but i'll do it in the morning!!

wc: 3.3k+

note: i've been on some sort of writing kick so enjoy these daily updates D: anyway can y'all tell i'm MISSING my mum. only four more weeks though! x

pt i. / pt ii. / pt iii.

You were elbow deep in a sink of dirty dishes, your Mum towelling dry the plates next to you, when you finally came out and said it.

“Am I a disappointment, Mum?”

She froze right there, arms poised and plate hovering mid-air. It was only a second later when she recovered, gently placing the dish on the counter when she turned to look at you. Her head was titled in that concerned way of hers, and you’re not sure what it was about the look in her eyes – of hurt and worry and love – but the tears started flowing right then and there.

“Oh, my love, how could you ever think that?” she questioned, tugging you into her arms, not caring about the water from your hands or the tears from your eyes soaking her new cotton dress. She smelled of chamomile tea and custard creams and home. And as much as you thought you hated her sometimes; her reassurance was what you needed most when the world seemed out to get you.

“You could never disappoint me or Da’, you know that.” She pulled back, forcing you to look up into her eyes, noticing the shimmer across her own irises. “Tell me you know that my sweetest girl.”

“I—” and your voice broke but you kept going— “I don’t know if I do.” With a deep breath you tried to explain it all. “It just seems like everyone hates me sometimes. And I guess it, I’m difficult, I know that I am, but sometimes—I mean, a lot of the time, really, it feels like I can’t control it. When I argue and bicker and stomp away in a tantrum. It’s these feelings—I have so many, and I never know what to do with them, and it’s like drowning in indecision and I always make the wrong choice.”

“I know, love, I know,” she soothed, pulling you back in and smoothing her palm across your hair. You melted into her embrace like you hadn’t since you were ten years old. “You’re so much like me, you know? I swear, hear it every time we’re out with our friends. And when I was your age, I felt that way too. Lost and overwhelmed and like I wasn’t enough.”

“So, what did you do—to get rid of those feelings, I mean?” you asked, already dreading her answer.

“I didn’t. And you shouldn’t want to, either.” You almost lifted your head to argue but stopped yourself before you could. “Your emotions and feelings and thoughts and dreams—they make you who you are. Of course, it’s important to acknowledge the root of the ones that pester you the most and try to understand why they have such a hold over you. And maybe it’s my fault, really, for not saying it more, but we are so so proud of you.”

“I think you say it more to James and Sirius than you do to me,” you pointed out, a slight bite to your words but not enough to sting.

“James is, well, James. I can’t deny that he’s occasionally—” you raised your eyebrow incredulously at that and she responded with an amused eyeroll— “struggled with his classes and getting it together, so it seemed important to guide him in the right direction with praises. Sirius, on the other hand—well, we’re all he has. We just wanted him to feel loved.”

You nodded, understanding, but not sure how you fit into all of this. “Then you, my love. When you were younger you were always naturally good at things. I never understood where you got that from cause it certainly wasn’t from me. You put little effort into things and excelled, so maybe I got used to the idea that I knew you’d always be alright even if I didn’t say anything. But that’s my fault, I shouldn’t have withheld my pride out of laziness.”

“I don’t think you’re lazy, Mum,” you urged, but she hushed you with that stern voice of hers.

“I’m sure you don’t but shush because I won’t admit it again,” she scolded, her voice entirely mocking and somewhere between those tears, you managed a smile. “Your Da’ and I always knew you’d go on to do brilliant things. You’re intelligent, and passionate, and those muggle kids of yours adore you. You’re shaping their lives in ways you can’t even know, and they’re lucky to have you, just like I am, my sweet girl.”

She leaned forward, placing a kiss to the crown of your head.

“And do you hate that I live at home still?”

She reeled back, both shocked and confused. “of course not. We love having you here! It’s entirely selfish, really. Got to convert James’ old room into a study, as well as keep you around for the company and to help with chores. If anything, I don’t want you to move out,” she explained, serious. “Really, if you had more natural light in your room, we would’ve helped you to a new place the second you graduated from Hogwarts.”

You barked out a laugh at that, entirely believing her. “Okay, okay. I get it. I’m wanted, or whatever.” You could feel your cheeks flaring at the thought of saying it out loud, but you ignored the feeling to relish in your Mum’s embrace a little while longer.

“Oh, yeah—whatever,” she teased, reaching up to wipe a stray tear from your face. “You could never disappoint me.”

All you could do was nod before your face dropped with apprehension. “What—what is it, love?” she asked, concerned herself.

“Well, you see, you say that now but I did something kind of dumb…” you trailed off, unable to confess just yet.

“What did you—you didn’t murder someone, did you? Because I love you but I don’t think I could manage Azkaban with those arthritis flare ups I’ve been getting.”

“What--! Mum, no, I didn’t—how could I? How could you think I’d be capable of murder?!” and really it had been the longest you’d gone without absolutely belting at someone.

“You are quite easily irritated,” she reasoned.

“If people stopped being so irritating—” you stopped, taking a deep breath, before confessing— “No, it’s both better and worse.”

“Go on,” she encouraged, but even she didn’t seem entirely convinced.

“I kissed Sirius.”

And it was like crickets between the two of you. Not a scolding shout or a cry of horror or—

“Okay… and is that it?” she asked bluntly.

“What do you mean ‘is that it?’. It’s wild, unbelievable, otherworldly, even!” you sputtered, not quite comprehending the calm with which she was speaking.

“Oh, don’t be dramatic, love. It’s not a good look,” and she pushed you out of the way to continue scrubbing at the dirty dishes, ignoring your stunned frame.

“Aren’t you going to ask me ‘why’?” you pushed, peering over her shoulder to check she was very much alive and breathing and not pranking you with a bit of some sort.

“I don’t need to, I know why,” she answered simply. You balked, tugging her shoulder back so she halted her movements and turned to face you.

“And what might that ‘why’ be?”

“It’s simple, really. You love him, you’ve always loved him. Since you were five and he pushed James into the dirt for stealing your copy of that Tiger, Wizard, and Cabinet’ book.”

You couldn’t help the way your hand slapped against your face right then, from exhaustion or exasperation, you weren’t sure. “It’s the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, Mum,” you groaned.

“That definitely doesn’t sound right,” she pouted. “Anyway, he got the book back from James and you were so pleased you came up to me and said ‘Mummy, I think Sirius isn’t so bad after all, can we keep him?’. And when I explained the laws around owning human beings, you huffed and hid under the dining room table all day until you fell asleep.”

“Well, that does sound like me…”

“Of course, it sounds like you. I’m your mother,” she chided. “You didn’t start pretending to hate Sirius until you were about ten or eleven and he got that first girlfriend of his. What was her name—Lacey? Macey?”

“Stacey,” you chewed out, only to realise the anger with which you spoke her name despite never having known her. “Oh—”

“’Oh’ indeed. And what did you say to young Sirius after this kiss?” she pried, entirely engrossed in the story now as she rested her hip against the damp counter.

“I might’ve—you know---”

“No! you didn’t!” she burst out, already knowing exactly what you were going to say.

“I did, Mum, I did,” you moaned, pathetic and questioning if there was any way to rectify the situation, you’d found yourself in.

“Well, I can’t help you with that, love. You’re on your own, kid,” she explained, wiping her hands clean before sending you off (you weren’t entirely sure where, exactly) with a pat on your back.

If you were anyone else, you would’ve taken such an encouraging conversation and somewhat-healed trauma of your childhood as a sign to go speak with Sirius.

But no, lucky for you, you were you.

He hadn’t shown up to work all week, using the flu as an excuse. So when James and Lily invited you over for a small gathering— “Really, James, two parties in one month? What kind of home are you raising my nephew in!”—you hadn’t thought much of it, or him.

“Do let me know if I’ve got this correct– you’ve decided to host a fourth of July party despite not being American, or, now that I think about it further, ever having been to America?” you questioned, genuinely worrying for Lily’s sanity as she rocked a bumbling Harry on her lap, cheeks painted with red, white and blue stars.

“Well, when you put it like that,” James groused, pouting, arms folded against his chest despite being the adult that he was.

“How else would you put it, James?” you argued, exasperated.

Lily perked up at the sound of a potential fight and silenced the two of you with a single look. If anyone was made to be a mother, it had to be Lily. She was compassionate and kind and gentle, as much as she could scare you with a simple glance, she could soothe all your worries as well.

“Look, I just needed an excuse to have a beer, and what better excuse is there than this! The holiday of beers—” I thought that was St. Paddy’s “—Hush! Otherwise, I’d have to wait for someone’s birthday or, what’s the next holiday–? Halloween? That’s ages away.”

You smirked at his odd logic. “Obviously it doesn’t necessarily have to be very Americana or whatever. Red, white and blue– just close your eyes and pretend it’s the beloved Union Jack instead!”

The gathering wasn’t as big as the last one, and you recognised the few familiar faces as Lily and James’ closest friends: Remus, Marlene, Mary, Peter, Sirius—

Sirius? Your head whipped back in a double take, watching as he pulled Remus into a hug ‘hello’ right by the garden gate. He hadn’t noticed you, not yet, but it didn’t take long for his gaze to fixate right on you. You couldn’t read his face, not having ever quite mastered the skill, but this time especially, he looked dazed and withdrawn.

Even his smiled seemed tight, like he didn’t quite mean it, and your heart plummeted at the thought that you’d done that to him.

“I’ll be right back,” you offered, distracted, to James as he preoccupied himself with squeezing Harry’s chubby fist.

Sirius had gone straight inside, probably headed for the kitchen, and you followed suit, wondering what it was about your brother’s house that had the two of you both rushing to and avoiding confrontation.

You found him right where you had expected—peering into the dimly lit fridge and pulling out a bottle of beer.

“Sirius,” you said, announcing your presence as you let the door click shut behind you. Luckily, no one else was inside the house, rather taking in the one day of sunlight and light breeze in an otherwise damp English spring.

You watched as his shoulders tensed instantly, and you just knew he wanted to be anywhere else but there, with you, at that moment, but he turned to face you anyway.

“How can I help, Potter?” he asked, keeping his cards close to his chest still.

“Can we talk?”

“Isn’t that what we’re doing right now,” he pointed out, brow raised as he took a deep gulp of his drink, cringing at the taste.

“That’s not what I mean, and you know it,” you pushed back, inching a step forward.

“No, I don’t know what you mean,” he replied smoothly, seemingly untouched by the implication behind your words.

“You’re such a prick sometimes, Sirius.”

“And you’ve only just noticed? My, didn’t take you as slow, Potter,” he noted, mockingly, and you flinched at his casual cruelty.

“Don’t do that,” you scolded.

“Do what?” he fought back, “Speak my mind? Seems like you’re the only one allowed to do that around here, and when anyone dares contest, well, all hell breaks loose.”

“You’re not speaking your mind, though,” you argued.

“Ah, and you know my mind so well, do you?” The annoying thing about Sirius, amongst many other things, was that he knew how to get under your skin. Had perfected the craft after years of verbal combat with you. So his words poked and prodded at your soft underbelly with ease as he brandished his hurt around like a swordsman with a too-heavy sword.

“Maybe not entirely, but when it comes to us, I think I know enough.” He stayed silent after that, hesitant, as if waiting for you to make the first move. “The other day, when we kissed—” and you knew you were getting hotter because something, some feeling, flickered behind his irises “—I said it was a mistake—”

“—I know, love. I was there,” he scowled. “No need to remind a man of his failings.”

“Just— let me finish!” You inhaled, slow, before continuing. “I said it was a mistake when, in fact, I felt the opposite. It’s just—it’s you and I, Sirius, and when it comes to us, I might know, inside, what I mean and feel and intend to show but when it comes to the actual ‘doing’ part of it all, I always seem to mess up. So, when I said it was a mistake, what I really meant was—”

And it was his turn to cut you off with his mouth, only this time it was sweet and yearning and apologetic as opposed to the fire and passion and lust that had guided the two of you the last time you’d found yourself in his hold.

His mouth slid over your own, careful and inquisitive, whilst his palms cradled your face, as if you’d slip out of his grasp if he moved even an inch in the wrong direction.

It was lovely, really.

As much as you wished for him to keep going, to keeping kissing you like he might yearn for you too (though you wouldn’t be saying those three words for a while), you were horribly aware of the fact that Lily, or worse, your brother, might walk in at any moment.

So, Sirius didn’t allow himself to get carried away with you, not yet at least, and instead he pulled away with a content sigh, tracing your bottom lip with his thumb as if to memorise it by feel alone.

“Is that our thing then? Kisses in the form of sneak-attacks?” you mused, vibrating and giddy and utterly pleased.

“Could be, if you want?” and it seemed like he was still entranced with your mouth to properly reply in any meaningful manner.

“Sirius,” you pleaded, urging him to look at you, properly. He tore his gaze away from your lips, finally, and the way his face split into a grin had those fucking butterflies returning, tenfold. “Are you okay?”

“I will be once I take you to mine and do that all over again, only, a little less clothed and a lot more horizontal” he promised, the cheek of his you had come to endearing having return after his previous sulking.

“You’re a menace,” you groaned as he buried his smirking face into the crook of your neck, holding you tight to him before his grip relaxed and he pressed a kiss to your forehead, holding you right there.

“I know, and I’m only joking—well, if you want me to be joking, I will be. But I’m fine—I swear it. It just seems surreal, us, like this,” he explained.

“I get that, it is a bit odd, but I’ve realised you need to contextualise those weird, new feelings and not let them control you, at least, not if they’re ‘bad’ or whatever,” you offered clumsily, trying, in your own way, to relay the same advice your Mum had.

He snorted in response, and you smacked his back from where your arms were wrapped around him. “You sound like your Mum.”

“Mm, that is my Mum. Only, she said it better, and more concise, and in that Mum-way that just makes sense.”

“Ah, well that makes a bit more sense.” He pulled back for a moment, not letting you out of the circle of his arms yet. “We should talk about this a little more, shouldn’t we?”

You nodded, sighing as you moved away from him to get a hold of your thoughts once more. “I think, for me at least, I conflated anger with my feelings for you because I wasn’t exactly sure how to handle them, and deep down, I worried you’d reject me, so it seemed easier to argue with you than—”

“--this,” he finished for you, and he must’ve read the agreement on your face because he bobbed his head in response. “It makes sense, really, and it’s about the same for me, only, there was the whole issue of James and, I mean, I’m older—”

“—by a few years,” you maintained, scowling, and he wanted to kiss you for it.

“Yes, love, but a few years means different things depending on how old you are. We’ve never really been in the same phase of life until now, so I don’t think I wanted it—nor would it have been appropriate, really—until a year or two ago. By then, it seemed too late, so I just kept—”

“—bickering.”

“Yeah, bickering. Arguing. Biting back. It was the safer option.” And everything he said made sense, it was all entirely reasonable, but you still mourned the time lost to not being entirely honest with each other.

“But there’s no point worrying over that now, not when we can’t do anything about it,” he reasoned, noting the faraway look in your eyes and centring you back, there, with him.

“We should get back to the party,” you whispered, fearing what would happen when the two of you left the safety on the kitchen, flooded still with gold and a certain stillness that had you aching for this moment to be forever.

“Yeah, love, let’s go back,” he answered, just as quiet, nudging his head toward the door. Just as your hand came up to turn the doorknob, Sirius’ palm came up in front of you, halting your movements. He stood, still, behind you, and close as ever. You could feel every breath he took, and that damn cologne you’d started missing in the bookstore as well. “Don’t worry about us, love, we’ll be fine,” he assured you.

You answered by turning the knob and making your way back towards the garden. Sirius followed from behind, and when you stepped through the backdoor, you realised how little had changed since you’d gone inside, but also just how much had changed, as well.

as always, please comment and reblog if you enjoyed this <3

#sirius black #sirius black x reader #sirius black x you #sirius black x y/n #sirius black angst #sirius black fluff #sirius black oneshot #marauders fanfiction #the marauders

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penelopepine · 1 month

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Don't be a stranger! Pt. 3

Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

Simon "Ghost" Riley x FemReader

Content: Neighbors AU, fluff, developing relationship

For the first time in a long time Simon wasn't glad to be leaving his flat. Every other time he would have already been out the door and on his way back to the base. Instead he's sitting at his table nursing a cup of tea at 5am; trying to take in as much as he can before leaving for who knows how long.

You and Simon had said your goodbyes to each other last night per his request. He didn't want you having to be up this early when you still had to wake up for work in just a couple hours. Which was something that made him worried to think about. He had been walking with you everyday, and this was going to be his first time not doing that with you. You were going to start doing a lot of things without him now though.

Simon was sure in just a couple weeks of him being gone you'll have forgotten all about him and moved on in life. Sure he had your phone number now, but he's not going to be able to communicate with you for long periods whenever he's out on a mission. He'll become the neighbor who shows up every once in a while, and no longer your friend. He just knew it.

A sudden knock at his door broke him of these thoughts. He cautiously approached the door; there were only two options he could think of for who was at the door. Either it was someone who was here to try and hurt him or it was you.

He looked through the peephole and once he had confirmed who it was he opened the door.

It was you. Of course it was you, as much as he wished you had listened and were instead asleep right now; Simon was happy to see you. Standing in the doorway with a wide grin on your face, and holding a box.

"Simon! I'm so glad I managed to catch you before you left," You hold out the box towards him, "here this is for you as well!"

Simon softly says your name before grabbing the box from you and letting you step inside, “What’s this? Also shouldn’t you be asleep right now. I thought we agreed to say goodbye last night.”

“You did say that, but I never agreed to it!” You step inside giving him a soft shoulder bump, “and that is a gift that you are not allowed to open until you get back to base.”

With a small smile on his face Simon gives a huff, “I suppose I should’ve known better to think that you would’ve listened.”

“I’ll listen when it’s important, but you never could’ve stopped me from being up and walking you out to the car. It’ll be like our normal walks except I’m walking you to work this time.”

Simon will deny it to everyone, even himself, but he felt so cared for in that moment. Here you were at 5am wanting to be with him to the last second. Not because you had to or worked together, but simply because you wanted to.

"Should I expect an escort from the car to the building when I return as well?"

"Just tell me when to be there and I will."

He hopes you keep your word on that. Before anything else can be said his phone pings, "It seems my car is here."

You give him a sad smile as the two of you head to the door. "I'm going to call and text you by the way; you're not going to get rid of me this easily."

"I won't always be able to reply." He wasn't going to lie and say the two of you would always be in constant communication. That would only lead to hurt for both of you, "but I'll try to when I can."

"That's ok, besides who else am I going to get to listen to me ramble about my day?"

"Then I look forward to your 20 minute voicemail messages then, love."

The rest of the walk to the car is passed with you telling Simon what plans you have coming up, and that he shouldn't worry about his place since you'll hold down the fort for him while he's gone.

You stood silently now standing by his side as he put his bag in the trunk. Looking at you he can clearly see a glassy look in your eyes as you look up at him.

"Can- can I get a hug before you go?" You nervously ask.

You and Simon had exchanged shoulder bumps, back pats, and side hugs at most. Never have the two of you given the other a real hug. It took just a moment to think before Simon was opening up his arms towards you. Instantly you rush forward and you both stand there for a moment holding on to each other.

“Be safe.” You whisper before letting go, and taking a step back. Letting Simon get inside the car.

He watched up for as long as he could; memorizing you to mind. When he couldn’t see you any longer Simon took a deep breath, and slipped back to what he was most comfortable with. Being the ghost he was once more.

“Aye, Lt. good to see you again! How was your time off?” Johnny of course was there right as soon as he stepped back on base. Normally he’d appreciate it, but right now all he wants is to get to his room. You said he couldn’t open the package till he got here, and he didn’t want to wait any longer than he had to.

“It was fine.” Simon says as he walks past the other, “I’ll meet up with you later Johnny.”

“You better! I have a lot of gossip that I need to catch you up on.”

“Copy that.”

He didn’t stop walking till the door to his room was firmly shut behind him. Placing his bag down he sat at the desk and opened the box.

Inside was a small container, a bracelet, and a letter. Pulling out the container first he opened it to find the little thing filled with cookies and a note on top.

“I know you have a secret sweet tooth! Hope you enjoy these!” The note read. It was hard for him to not smile at that. He didn’t know that you had noticed that about him; it was actually something he tried to hide from you.

The bracelet was clearly homemade by you. It is made up of black and gray beads, and a small silver pendant the shape of a heart. He runs his fingers over the pendant feeling the smooth cool surface before he slips the bracelet onto his wrist. He’ll cover it with his sleeves or put it in his pocket when he’s not in his own personal space.

A thought pops into Simon’s head as looks at it; taking out his phone he takes a quick photo of the bracelet and sends it to you. Along with a text thank you for the cookies as well.

Looking back in the box there was only the letter left. This was the item that made him the most nervous to look at. Very carefully though he opened it.

“Simon,

The very first day I met you I was so worried that you were there to yell at me. That I had already messed up a relationship with one of my neighbors, but you had surprised me. You offered to help me, and I said yes.

That was the best decision I could have made. Having you as my friend will never be a mistake. I’m going to miss you while you’re gone, but rest assured as soon as you get back home I’ll make you whatever you want!

Make sure to stay safe out there and bring me back any cool rocks you find!

Sincerely,

Your favorite neighbor!”

Reading the letter he couldn’t help but think about every moment he spent with you; noting to himself how different everything seems to be now in his life. He never thought he would meet someone like you that made him feel a certain way.

With something akin to horror Simon realized what that feeling was, he liked you, he wanted you to be his. Somehow you had dug yourself into his heart, and made a home.

Taglist:

@nexthyperfix @spicyspicyliving @yourdaydreamerfan @tf141gloryhole

#simon riley x reader #ghost x reader #x reader #fem reader #task force 141 #call of duty #simon ghost riley #female reader #john soap mactavish

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elisysd · 11 months

Note

hi! could i please request some comfort charles? like you’re sick or feeling down and he’s just the best boyfriend ever and helps you through it? thank you so much 🧡

Thank you for your request and sorry for the little delay! Hope you'll like it! Requests are open. I'm not guarantee you to be fast tho 😅

Tissues and Pit stops

You couldn’t be sick for Charles’ home Grand Prix. You just couldn’t be. You did not know how you managed to get the flu right before Monaco’s race but here you were, in bed a box of tissues next to you and medicine to help you get rid of the headache.

You had not said anything to Charles. You did not want him to worry, he did not need that. You were not proud to admit it, but you lied to your boyfriend when he asked you if you would come to the paddock for qualifying. You pretended to have some work to catch up on, but you still would be keeping an eye on the TV and cheering him on from the window. On the other hand, you did not manage to find a good excuse to miss his race. That’s why today you would keep things slow. Bed rest, soup, and medicine and hopefully, you were praying for it, on Sunday you would be fine for the race.

But what you did not plan was for Charles to show up upset at your door after the qualifying session. Ferrari had, once again, found a new way to mess with his home Grand Prix. When you opened the door to let him in, completely caught off guard by his presence, he immediately noticed that something was wrong.

Your flat was a mess which was unusual. You were always so put together, so organised. The opposite to Charles. So, seeing cluttery everywhere and abandoned dirty plates in the sink of the kitchen surprised him to say the least.

“Babe… are you okay?” he asked carefully while looking around.

“Me? Perfectly fine. Never been this good.” You tried to persuade him while trying to suppress a sneeze. “I should ask you the question, I heard about the penalty.”

“Yeah… well it is what it is. I can’t do anything about it. I’ll try to have a good race tomorrow, but I don’t expect anything from it. I just needed to see you and hold you.”

He made a move to take you in his arms, but you skilfully avoided him, pretending to pick up something that was laying on the floor.

“I’m not sure it’s a good idea… you must have so many things to do. Like meetings and people to talk to. I don’t want to stay in your way. And you must be tired. You should sleep it’s important.”

“Y/N are you sure you okay, you are acting weird.” He was starting to worry.

“What do you mean? I’m…me. My usual self.”

“No, you’re not. What are you hiding? Why is your flat a mess?”

“I told you; I caught up with some important paperwork and I just did not have time to clean.”

“I know my girlfriend and I know there is no way she would let her flat be this messy.”

His eyes scanned a room trying to find a clue that could explain his girlfriend’s strange behaviour. And then his gaze landed on the sofa where a used tissue and a stuffed animal he knew well from giving it to you on your first anniversary as a couple were lying around. As he approached, he noticed a heating bottle and a thermometer under a cushion. He did not need more to understand the matter.

“How long have you been sick?” he asked.

“It started this morning… I woke up with fever. That’s why I did not want to see you today… I don’t want you to get whatever I caught. I would feel bad.” You confessed.

“Baby, you will always be one of my biggest priorities. I want you to tell me these kinds of things.”

“I did not want you to worry…”

Without a word he took care of the stuff that was laying around in the living room before washing the dishes. When the flat looked cleaner, he took a blanket from your bedroom as well as your computer and installed them on the sofa and coffee table. He then went into the bathroom to prepare you a hot bath with some lavender in it to help you relax. Without asking for anything in return, he took care of you, washing your hair with your favourite shampoo and massaging your shoulders and back that were aching from the fever.

He then helped you get comfortable and once back in the living room he wrapped you in a big and fluffy blanket before making you both some chamomile tea. He pressed you against his chest while setting up your favourite movie, his hand tracing patterns on your skin and his lips absent-mindedly resting on the top of your head.

“Charles, I appreciate what you did, really but you should not be here. What if you got sick?”

“Then we will be sick together and honestly I don’t mind it.”

And indeed, a few days later, Charles was stuck in bed with the same flu that you had a few days prior. And just like him, you spent the day taking care of him. After all, you both did promise to one another to always stick around when things would get rough. You were each other’s rock, there in the good as well as in the bad moments. Forever and always.

#charles leclerc #charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc x reader #fiction #writing #charles leclerc imagines #charles leclerc x female reader #cl16 #cl16 x reader #charles leclerc blurb #f1 x oc #f1 fic #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #charles leclerc fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 x you

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klaustozier · 1 year

Text

uniform ; miguel o'hara

SUMMARY: you and spiderman 2099 are arch enemies, but when you capture him things are different.

warnings: miguel o'hara x fem!reader; you are archenemies; light knife play (there will be NO injuries being done, the knife is for taking off part of his clothes); angry sex; bigcock!miguel; nipple play (in both); light mask kink; again he will swear in spanish; mention of blood (he will bite you a little 😳); choking; degradation kink; fingering; pet names (princess); spanking and slapping; i think i might have a fang kink idk

word count: 2k

english is not my first language, so i'm sorry for any mistakes

the villain is invented for this story, okay? you don't exist in marvel universe, at least not that i know of

have fun ^^

Miguel was trapped. He had appeared in your lair to try to capture you before you destroyed more lives. But he didn't imagine it was just an ambush to capture him. He was in a dark warehouse, bound with chains, mostly on his hands, not wanting to give his claws a chance to help him break free.

"Oh…", you said approaching, wearing a tight black outfit, the beautiful makeup adorned your face, with sparkles on your eyelids and a star under the eyeliner, "You always think that you will be able to defeat me, but we know that is not so, uh?", you approached with knives in hand, your face getting close to his, the mask and a small distance separating them, "You have to remember that I will always, always be one step ahead… Miguel."

His eyes widened, his mask moving in astonishment, "What?"

You laughed, "You don't have to hide from me, I know a lot more than you can imagine…", the tip of the knife passed gently across his cheek, cutting through the mask without difficulty, making him pull back his face, "Calm down, mi amor", you whispered, "Miguel is a beautiful name…"

"How did you find out?", he asked, feeling the cold wind of the warehouse lit by computers cool the skin on his cheek that had been exposed.

You were good with knives so you hadn't cut him because you didn't want to draw blood, and something inside him responded to the thought that you could do as you pleased with him.

"Ah…", you chuckled, "I have my tricks, Mr. O'Hara", the knife slid gently across his chest where the chains didn't hold him, horizontally, the uniform opened, revealing his strong chest. You sighed seeing the delicate nipples prickling, his breathing seemed uneven not out of fear, or out of anger, but for another reason, which made your eyebrow rise, "Oh…", you smirked, positioning the flat part of the knife on his nipple, making him suck in air between his teeth as the cold metal made contact with his hot skin. He groaned and shook his head trying to get rid of that feeling when the thin sharp tip of the knife played with his skin, "What a shame, Miguel. ¿No tienes vergüenza de eso?", you laughed seeing his erection showing in your tight clothes, "You like to be dominated by the enemy, Miguel?"

Your mouth was positioned on his, still covered over the mask, not much contact, just a slight proximity.

"You will pay for this", he whispered.

You laughed, your knife being placed in its holster on your thigh, leaving you free to slide your finger across his nipple, "How? Are you going to lock me up, 20-9-9? You'll never get it and you know it", and you ran your tongue across his lip, the tip of the knife in your other hand playing gently with the skin of his chest, only teasing the delicate skin, not cutting it.

"Shut the fuck up."

"Come on, Spider-Man."

You, again, licked his lip, then biting it, still covered by the thin cloth, your finger pinching his nipple. Abruptly, he grabbed you, grabbing your arms, pushing you toward the center of the room, slamming you against the computers.

Pulling the mask off, baring his massive fangs at you, earning a wry smile, "So pissed off."

"Carajo", he cursed.

And he kissed you. First you were startled, then you allowed it to continue. Your mouth opened to allow his tongue in, kissing him angrily, feeling his fangs rub against your lower lip, scraping as you kissed him. Your hands went to his soft black hair, stroking as you kissed him angrily.

The older one held your face tightly, his lips red from the kiss, panting hard, "You have to learn to shut your fucking mouth."

"If I don't learn, will you teach me, Miguel?", the way you said his name filled him with anger. You took the knife in your hand and started ripping his clothes off, from his neck, down his chest, until your hand was grabbed and the knife was positioned under your neck, "Are you going to kill me, O'Hara?"

"In a little bit", he promised.

And he kissed you again. His hands went to your ass, squeezing through the tight pants you wore, devouring your lips. One of his hands went to your chest, its claws scratching at the tight-fitting black turtleneck you wore, ripping through the material. With the hand that previously ripped your clothes off you, he grabbed you by the neck and squeezed, pushing you against the computer screens, looking at what he had done.

Your chest rose and fell, your lips red from the kiss, your breasts showing through the torn fabric. His free hand went to your breasts, scratching the soft skin over the nipple gently before sliding his thumb over the hard spot making you moan.

"Such a sweet moan, fucking slut", he grinned, letting go of your neck so he could grab both breasts at the same time, pinching the nipples, your back arching in the direction of his touch. Your legs tightened together making him laugh, "Carajo… tan increíble…"

"Miguel", you whispered.

You groaned loudly as you received a slap across the face after he held it, making you look at him, "Don't call me that."

"What do you want me to call you? Daddy?", you mocked, getting another slap on the face.

He laughed, bringing his face closer to yours, "I want you to shut up."

"Whatever you want, cariño."

He smirked and gave you a soft peck, lowering his lips to your neck, scraping his sharp teeth over your skin. Even though it was smooth, a little blood escaped, instinctively, he ran his tongue over the área, tasting your blood, before continuing his way down.

You held your own breasts and offered them to him. The brunette smiled and looked at you as he licked at your nipples before scraping his fangs over them. You moaned and took a deep breath feeling his strong hands tearing your pants, he didn't even use the claws, it was brute force, and that alone made your pussy throb.

He knelt down between your legs, picking one of them up and placing it over his shoulder. His intention was to provoke you, to just lick your thighs, kiss your pussy and lick the wet delicate lips, but you didn't have the patience, so you squeezed his hair and forced his handsome face against your pussy.

His lips sank into your wet pussy and he sighed as he began to lick you with so much lust, his mouth getting all wet. His experienced tongue going up and down with no rhythm, making you squirm and whine, while holding his hair. Miguel's claws were positioned over his thighs, holding them while he sucked your clit.

"Tan dulce", he whispered.

The brunette gently bit your thigh, making you moan and tremble, "Harder", you asked softly.

"Puta", he chuckled.

He bit the thigh a little harder, kissing the área, and soon after, started licking it, moaning low as he felt the taste of your blood on his skin again.

Miguel retracted his claws and took the gloves off one hand just so he could fuck you with his fingers, he needed to feel you, you were just begging for him to fuck you while you moaned disconnected words and begged for absolutely nothing with your mind completely blank. His mouth was experienced, licking you with such precision, making you squirm and moan, gripping his dark hair.

When O'Hara sensed you were close to cum, he pulled away, getting up, lips all wet with your pleasure, the pretty lips glistening, he licked them tasting a little bit more of you.

"No", you whimpered, "I thought you were the good guy."

"You thought wrong, princess", he sighed looking down, "Come on, take off my pants."

You nodded, taking a knife from your boot and sliding the shiny blade down the happy trail area, tearing his uniform, taking his cock in your hands and sighing thinking you could finally suck him off and have your jaw hurt from the effort to suck that thick cock.

Miguel had other plans. He flipped you over on the table, leaving you with your face pressed against the computer screen, your ass facing him. He slapped your ass and positioned the tip of his cock at your entrance. Your legs shook.

"Miguel", you whispered, "please."

"Oh", he chuckled, "are you polite then?"

You wanted to respond, to be rude and smart, but there wasn't time. Miguel sunk his cock all the way into you, his cock filling you completely, stretching you.

"I'll leave you all loose…", whispered the brunette, his body leaning against yours, biting your earlobe, "You'll stay days", and he thrust hard, pausing, "and days" , lunging once more, "thinking of me."

"Miguel."

O'Hara smiled and continued to thrust, making the table move with his movements, the monitors moving with the force he exerted. You whined softly and he moaned low, against your ear, feeling your insides crush him, press on his cock.

He didn't think he was going to end the day like that, fucking his archenemy in your hideout, but he wasn't going to complain, it felt so good. They kissed, the movements didn't stop. At first, as you went, he came back, but time passed and the rhythm was out of step with their desperation, each moving how they saw fit to sick for their own pleasure. His hands caressed and pinched your nipples, which were erect and hard against your digits.

You came first, moaning loudly in agony, your lower lip being bitten as you felt your body being overcome with pleasure.

You didn't have time to compose yourself, Miguel picked you up and put you on your knees in front of him. The thick cock in front of your face, glistening, the tip flushed and oozing pre-cum. One of your hands held the thick base, helping you to suck it while the other went to his ass, squeezing the soft flesh. You had to do it, you had looked at his ass on his uniform far too many times not to feel the need to grab it.

His hands held your hair, moaning low, feeling his cock hitting your throat, "What a loose throat, uh, princess?"

You smiled and licked the base before swallowing all of it again, your hand and mouth making twisting motions, going back and forth to give him more pleasure. His moans made your pussy ache, it was so good to hear, so low and dark, his fangs gleaming in the delicate light.

He pulled you by the chin and forced your mouth open with his hand, his thumb holding your tongue and the other fingers under your chin. He jerked off looking into your eyes, pausing only to watch his cum fall onto your tongue. The brunette held your mouth open for a few seconds, absorbing the image of you like that, the cheeks flushed, the eyes watery, the lips red and the tongue marked with his cum. And after that, he finally released it so you could swallow.

"Puta madre", he whispered as you got on your feet.

"I agree", you laughed while kissing him.

Miguel kissed you desperately, tasting his cum on your tongue. For a second, he wondered what he would do now, with his clothes torn like that, how would he get out of there like that? He needed to change clothes, but what clothes would he put on? Without being able to think of a solution, the brunette felt a thin needle in his neck, letting go of your lips, and soon after his body went limp, fainting.

Miguel woke up in his home, scared. He was wearing his own pajamas and lying on his bed, in the empty space next to him, his uniform was folded delicately with a card and a note on top.

Lost, he took the note and read it, chuckling afterwards.

"2099,

I hope you can pay off the damage with this credit card. We can't let you fight evil with your cock out. It will scare the old ladies.

Next time, you'll end up in a coffin, not in your bed after I blew you oh so gracefully. So be careful.

Signed,

Your #1 fan."

...

well, i hope you liked it <3

please reblog and leave a like if you enjoyed it! and leave a comment with your thoughts, i would love to know!

see ya next time.

(´｡• ᵕ •｡`) ♡

♡masterlist♡

#miguel o'hara x you #miguel o'hara fic #miguel o'hara fanfic #miguel o'hara smut #miguel o'hara #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara x y/n #spiderverse fanfic #oscar isaac x you #oscar isaac x y/n #oscar isaac smut #oscar isaac fanfiction #oscar isaac fic #miguel o'hara fanfiction #miguel o'hara imagine

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animehideout · 6 months

Note

Hello! can you do a scenario with gojo x reader who simps out loud for him

like she says the craziest shit she would do to him infront of everyone and they look at her like she crazy 💀

like she says "Gojo could slash me across the back with a belt and make me flow on the inside out"

and everyone just whips their heads at her and just give her that look😭😭😭

(BRO IDK IF THAT WAS ME BEING WERID OR SIMPING💀💀💀)

Gojo Satoru X Simp/Flirty Reader.

a/n: Thank you @bootyholeater for this request, I had do much fun writing it💗. I hope you like it tho 🥹🫶🏻

WHERE ARE MY GOJO SATORU SIMPS AT?

warnings: fluff overload with some smutty flirting 🫦.

No one ever managed to make the famous Gojo Satoru blush, let alone stutter.. but guess what?.. You did ! Congratulations 👏🏻.

Both of you are Jujutsu high students, spending the day face to face with him made you fall head over heels for him.

He was your type, he was literally the male version of you but add a lot of boldness.

Because you would openly simp for him, in public, in private, even during Yaga sensei class.

“ So class, you'll be paired up for a mission. Y/n and Geto both of yo-”

“But Sensei, I wanna be paired up with Gojo!!”

“huh, any reasons?”

“IDK, he's hot” you'd shrug.

Let's say simping shamelessly is your love language.

You'd literally be armed with a repertoire of pickup lines reserved for him.

And your pickup lines never fail in making him grin from ear to ear.

You'd flip your hair around him a lot.

Literally teasing a tease.

A light touch on his arm that'll flutter his heart.

When you're with your classmates, you'd literally say the dirtiest shit ever.

You'd be spending the evening with them when you started your flirting duty.

“Do you know that 70% of your body is water?” you'd pause shifting your gaze to Gojo, “And I'm 100% thirsty”

“Really y/n? We thought you're sharing a scientific fact but I guess flirting with Gojo is more important” said Shoko shaking her head.

Gojo would burst into uncontrollable laughter.

“Two peas in a pod, I swear to god” Exclaim Geto.

“What was your technique again y/n?”

“Baby-making technique wanna help in that.. Satoru?” you'd say with a wink.

“Nice blindfold Satoru, did you get rid of your sunglasses?” Asks Geto.

“yeah nice blindfold, wanna try that on me Satoru?”

“Seriously y/n? Again?”.

He loves the way you say his name, and loves your soft giggles.

He would turn off his infinity when you're around cuz he knows you get extremely touchy with him and FUCK he loves that.

“So what's you'll favorite food?” asked Geto.

“Oh, I'm a sweet tooth , I really enjoy sweets”

“Damn what a coincidence Gojo, me too. I enjoy sweets especially lollies, I enjoy sucking them”.

Geto would get his ass up and leave, he's so done with you.

You're literally unfazed by any awkwardness.

You don't care if your flirting comes out as cringe or cheesy, you said what you said and don't give a fuck as long as you're expressing yourself.

But 90% of the time your flirting is smooth ( like butter ).

You'd challenge him into a duel of pickup lines.

Literally made his jaw drop from all the raunchy lines you were directing to him.

“Your lap looks so inviting, inviting me to sit on it and roll my hips till we can't take it no more”

You'd never shy away, despite you being serious when you flirt with him, you always manage to create an atmosphere of lightheartedness for both of you ( definitely not others cuz they're whether cringing or shaking their heads in disappointment).

You'd always incorporate humor into your flirtation to the point that he thought that you're only joking and not really into him.

Geto would do you a favor and knock some sense into him, making him realize that you're actually giving him hints and not teasing him just for fun.

“Can't believe you're this dense Satoru”

“I- I thought she was just being playful”

The moment he knew, you had actual feelings behind your flirting, you'll start having an intense effect on him.

Geto would start teasing him, leading the conversation on to get you to flirt with him.

“So y/n who do you think is more handsome, me or Satoru?”

“Well Suguru you're handsome of course, but Satoru is the typa handsome that I would let him spank me with his belt and make me flow on the inside out”.

Their mouths would hang open from your extreme dirty simping.

His face would be crimson red, exposing him and betraying his attempt to look unfazed.

But he couldn't hide it, the effect you had on him was stronger.

“Satoru blushing? No fucking way” Said Shoko.

Geto is the sweetest he would help you with it.

After class you'd play Spin The Bottle and he managed to get you both together.

Would shove you both inside the closet, barely containing both of you.

He's a giant, big boy ( I need A big BoOoY).

You'd smirk “Finally, my moment has come”.

( I mean I'd pass out of excitement if I had 7 minutes in heaven with GOJO SATORU).

“So um D-do you h-hav”

“Why are you stuttering Gojo?”

“Fuck it” he would mutter, slamming his lips on yours, kissing the living shit out of you.

“Is this what you wanted huh?” he'd ask.

“Well if I'm being honest...I want more” you'd say with a mischievous smile.

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moumouton4 · 1 year

Text

Would He Handle Masturbating In Front Of You || Naruto characters x reader

Part 2 including : Madara Uchiha, Tobirama Senju and bonus : Hashirama Senju

A/n : Finally able to publish this 😍

Find part 1 including : Sasuke Uchiha, Itachi Uchiha, Kakashi Hatake and Orochimaru ➡ HERE

Warnings : NSFW, masturbation, mention of breeding, cum play, grinding, morning wood, use of Shadow Clone Jutsu, mention of Genjutsu, 18+ READERS ONLY and wrap it before you tap it

Masterlist ⚜

I don’t give permission to repost my work, if you want to share it just reblogue it

Words count : 1918 ( why that number 👀 )

Madara Uchiha :

The idea came to you because you felt his morning wood poking your ass when you woke up

With him, you would usually sleep on your own side of the bed, because he wanted to look tough, but you always either waited for him to fall asleep and then snuggle up in his arms, where he would welcome you eagerly, or he would move alone in his sleep until he caught you in his arms

You whispered his name several times because you felt his arms tighten around you, so he was probably awake

Just imagine this all whispered

"Madara-"

"What do you want ?"

"Would you like to touch yourself in front of me while you get rid of this ?" you said, emphasizing rubbing your ass on his shaft

He gasped from the friction

He was relieved by the dim morning light coming through the curtains because he was as red as his sharingan, but he felt compelled to act tough and nonchalant

"Feeling bold today aren't we ? Be careful you might burn your wings my Little Bird" he said in a teasing tone that hid his flustered state very well

"Come on please. I wanna make this about you-"

"So get on all fours and beg"

You huffed at his boldness he wasn't going to let his facade down like that

You held out hope because he didn't say no

Madara's only problem would be his habit of hiding what he thinks is weakness, unlike his body which he is very confident about being a skilled ninja

You tried everything... literally

"What if I let you breed me as a reward"

"You'll let me breed you anyways" ( true but that's an headcanon for another time U.U )

You asked so much he even joked about trapping you in a Genjutsu to fulfill your fantasy and have you leave him alone

But inwardly it made him much more that you wanted something from him so much

You really didn't know how to do it

Grab him by the feelings while crying ? No you still have self respect

Maybe you could make his life a living hell by sitting on him and grounding on his crotch- no you'll get aroused too and he'll never let you get away with you touching yourself if he doesn't want to indulge you in cumming

The whole thing was a real head scratcher ( and for me too )

And then you had a flash, sometimes when he fucked you he would pull out of your pussy to cum in your mouth - another way of showing that you belonged to him - so you made him a proposal he couldn't refuse

So that's how you ended up at the foot of the bed on your knees and naked while he masturbated sitting on the edge of the bed with his lust-filled gaze locked in yours. After fucking his fist for about ten minutes or so thinking about how pretty you'll look with his cum in your mouth

His cock was dripping precum and low grunts were coming out of his mouth. And when he was about to cum he called your name in a breathless voice, it was your cue to open your mouth and take his load in, swallowing every drop of cum he gave you after showing it to him

You hear him chuckle still breathless as he peered down at you

"Now it's my turn, and I hope you have enough to give me because I'm thirsty"

Tobirama Senju :

You asked him out of the blue one night when he was coming home from his brother's office, because you didn't want to miss his reaction for anything

It's true he was always grumpy and had a frowny face most of the time, unlike his brother who was a happy goofball

Sometimes you call him the “Frowny face nin” lmao

His expression was indeed priceless

He did a double take, his eyes wide, his red pupils looking very small, his mouth half open. He cleared his throat before speaking fearing that his voice might crack

"What's your problem ? Did you fall on your head today ? Or are you just more stupid than I thought ?" he asked in an outraged and angry voice and you swear you saw his eye twitch

"Well it could be fun-"

"Fun ?!?" Are you out of your mind ?!?" he screamed, his voice echoing in the walls of your living room

So you tried to chuckle you wait out of this and so far it has worked

I think even if you ask him a few times he won't accept

If you want it to happen one day you'll have to trick him

Maybe if you ask him to do it while you're touching yourself he'll say yes, but frankly I don't think so

He has a real block in showing his real feelings, like you know he loves you but he can't express it the way he wants to. Probably a consequence of growing up during a war

You try not to make fun of him when he's making an effort and you can tell by his red cheeks and ears that he's struggling and embarrassed, sometimes he even stutters, he's like "…dork- Darling"

But sometimes when you're really frustrated and you don't think before speaking, you compare him to his brother like "Even Hashirama with whom I’m not dating shows me more affection for being his sister-in-law than you who I've been with since ages-"

Aaaaaand you got him started

Okay this is not the most logical way to act but you know that by doing this he’s going to make you suffer... in a good way

“But your dumbass is stuck with me” he says punctuating his words with deep trusts

Tobirama knows that you are doing this to boost him and it works in a way, he’ll fuck you hard and then the next days he tries to be better than his brother and this healthy rivalry that he keeps to himself allows him to try to open up more

He feels that he still has to do better than his brother's cordiality towards you, and it works but it has its limits

This seems to be the only thing that keeps him from touching himself in front of you, because he doesn't have any problem with his body, he knows that you like what you see

Why else would you lick his abs when you ride him OHO

When he jerks off he thinks about you though, how else could he get that knot in his stomach to tighten if he wasn't thinking about the hottest kunoichi he'd ever seen walk the pavement of Konoha ?

One day he got curious and being the one who created of the Shadow Clone Jutsu, he wondered why not use it to train himself to try to achieve what you had proposed to him last time

Because no, from the moment you said it, it won't leave his mind until he makes your request a reality

So there he is, naked, blushy in front of a clone that looks just like you, his hard cock in his hand, his usual frown not leaving his eyebrows

His gaze alternating between your clone - naked or clothed - and the ceiling as the speed of his hand accelerated until he came

The clone disappeared right after and he thought it was extremely stupid, it wasn't really you so it's like he just gave in to his own fantasy all alone, he got even more annoyed by the situation

Next time it will be in front of you that he will touch himself... at least he is still thinking about it, because even if for now it seems impossible, he will at some point do it, because for you he’ll do anything

Bonus :

Hashirama Senju :

When you had the idea you couldn't even wait for you guys to meet up at home later. So you went straight to his Hokage office

You walked in smiling and closed the door behind you and fortunately he was alone

"Hey Y/n how's your day going my Lov-"

"Tell me how about you jerk off in front of me ?" ( lmao Y/n went straight to the point )

He shocked on his spit, as the sound of wooden floors cracking could be heard behind you, when you turned around you saw that a small flowering tree had grown in the room

"You're so excited about it" you said with a laugh

He was all red trying to recover from his surprise

"Come on, don’t you want to try ?" you added

"Not here !" he hissed still red, his hands covering his face

That's when his brother came in the office and you got kicked out because your boyfriend had a lot of work to do and no time to be distracted

So you continued on your day waiting for him to finish his, and for you both to finally meet in the privacy of your apartment

When he arrived you could tell he had a lot of pent up energy to spare

He had been hard from the moment the words “jerk off” and “in front of me” came out of your mouth, fortunately his hokage outfit was wide enough where he didn’t want people to look

To his great despair, it was already dinner time when he arrived, and you hadn't decided to make life easy for him, because you hadn't mentioned it again

Embarrassed as he is, he would have a hard time talking about the situation that occurred earlier in the day and especially during dinner

You left to do the dishes as if nothing had happened and he was extremely frustrated, so he came to you, his cheeks reddening, rubbing the back on his neck as he spoke

"Y-you didn't want to do something earlier ?"

"No what is it ?" you said, teasing him to the max before reassuring him when you saw his face break down, he was close to sitting in a fetal position on the floor

He doesn't have a problem with his physical appearance but he would prefer you to be close or even hold him while he touches masturbates

So now he is naked with his head resting on your as naked thighs, one of his requests knowing that it was impossible for him to cum without you cumming as well later

With one hand you play with his hair, scratching his scalp and with the other you run your fingers over his body, grazing his abs with your nails, going down to his pubic bone and even to his cock and down to his balls, which makes him buck in your hand while whimpering softly

Sometimes he looks up at you, and just your smile makes him feel even closer to his release

He looks so peaceful and relaxed that you can't help but praise him

"You're doing so good baby"

It doesn't take much to tip him over the edge as his balls tighten and he cum on his lower belly

His cock is pink from the stimulation and you take the opportunity to touch him and watch him squirm in your lap

Yet you won't be looking so smart when he’ll turn around and grab your ankles and pull you to him and dive into your cunt

Better be ready for it

A/n : Again my requests are open 🌯🍩

Taglist : @foxxymunson, @cl0vr, @ilovemanypeople, @glossy1pearl, @jane57sstuff

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noroi1000 · 11 months

Text

A place with too many monkeys

Summary: You're his shy kitty. And he won't let you go to a place full of monkeys.

Yandere Geto x shy reader

"Where are you going?"

You turned around calmly when you heard a soft voice coming from the bed you just got out of.

You smiled nervously and looked at Suguru's purple eyes that were staring at yours, waiting for an answer.

He lied. His cheek against the pillow as half of his bare chest was exposed by the duvet.

You're so nervous because you didn't want to wake him up. However, this man's instincts are too developed and sensitive for you to just get out of bed without his knowledge.

He is especially sensitive to you.

Because he knows he has to take care of you and take care of you. Protect you from a world full of monkeys...

You're his and he won't just give himself up to dirty hands... It wouldn't make sense if he did.

How could he give up HIS girlfriend? You are his only person so intimately close. He won't let anything hurt you...

He just can't allow it.

Only he can touch you. Only he can look at you.

"I wanted to go to the bathroom and then to the city. You know... Shopping won't..." you said giving him a small smile. A slight red on your cheeks as he looked at you like that.

You are a human. An ordinary man whose cursed energy exceeds the norm for non-sorcerers. But you're not a sorcerer either. You're just a man with cursed energy. That's why he treats you as well as other members of his "family".

However, you... You are almost the most important person to him. If not the most important. You're always supposed to be with him.

And the last thing he wants is for you to go out to those monkeys...

If anyone touches you, he will have to clean you.

If anything happened to you, he'd be so furious.

His cleaning you is not perfect...

It takes a little longer than a bath with many soaps to wash the smallest invisible thing off you.

It's practically keeping you with him for a long time. Because you can't leave his side.

You love him. But he's obsessed with you...

He will wash you and mark you. In this way, it will get rid of the "dirt" of people from you.

Because their eyes won't follow you when they know you belong to him.

You will be marked and show that you are his.

It can not be otherwise.

You are so sweet and innocent.

It's like he's keeping a small, pure and innocent pet locked away from the bloody world.

And that's how it is.

He keeps you from getting dirty with dirt that can't be washed off.

He holds you so that your white form will not be covered with black spots. Because once your soul gets dirty, you'll never go back to white.

His soul is black... And he can tell right away. He has been fighting and killing for years. He learned to murder in school... Killing curses... Even though a curse is a monster, he's still alive.

Therefore, he had no qualms about killing a man.

A non-sorcerer is not pure.

You are to be forever that sweet soul next to him.

So shy even though you've spent so much time with him.

"Larue later goes shopping in town. Nanako and Mimiko asked him to go with them to various shops. That's why you don't have to go there." he said with a small smile as he sat down. "Well... you can't go there."

He lifted his hands up to stretch himself.

"Suguru..." you murmured.

And you saw him get out of bed.

"You know I care about you like the most important thing, right? Because you are the most important to me. You're mine. That's why I can't let you go to a place with too many monkeys. Tell Nanako what you need and they'll buy it."

He walked over to you, placing his fingers on your cheek.

You blushed at the gentle touch and warmth of his hand.

You grabbed his wrist as I let him touch your cheek.

"You're so cute when you blush~" He hummed as he leaned down and kissed your forehead. "Don't forget that."

He pressed the finger of his other hand where your neck meets your shoulder. You looked to the side to see an arm full of marks made by his mouth.

Your face turned red as he buried himself in his chest to hide your embarrassment.

You were so shy. He loved how cute you are when you blush.

That's why he knew right away that you would be his.

And that no one will have the right to see your sweet, flushed face.

Only him.

You can't go to a place with so many monkeys. Someone may touch you or look at you. And only he can look at you and touch you.

If anyone else touches you with even a little finger, they will lose their entire arm.

His hands moved around your waist as he pulled you closer to his body.

You then pulled away from him, covering your face with your hands.

"What's going on?" he murmured with the same smile.

You covered your burning cheeks.

But even so, he knew you were blushing.

"You don't have a shirt..." You mumbled softly as he pulled you against his chest.

"You too may soon not have..." he whispered over your head making you feel like your body just went soft from overheating.

You leaned back even more as his forearms held you, and you fought to keep that smile of his out of sight.

"You're mine. And those red cheeks are mine too." He said close to your lips, blowing cold air slightly to show you that he is close. "You can't go to a place full of monkeys because you're mine. And I have other plans."

You placed your hands on his broad chest, pushing him slightly, but to no avail. He stood there, practically unfazed and amused by your attempts.

"Honey, you were still hugging me less than an hour ago~. And now you don't want to hug me? I feel hurt~."

His hands suddenly grabbed your shoulders, pressing you into his chest.

"I will never let you go. Especially for a place like this. Because my cute shy kitty belongs to me~."

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk x you #geto suguru #geto x reader #geto x y/n #yandere geto x reader #geto x you

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bvidzsoo · 7 months

Text

Salty tears, agog whispers

Author: bvidzsoo

Warnings: suicidal thoughts, mentions of death, injuries, wounds, blood, manhandling, mentions of sex worker, human trafficking, swearing, ptsd

Pairing: Kang Yeosang x female reader

Word count: 19,9k

Summary: Kang Yeosang was forced to flee from his once very familiar life as he killed his father. He didn't mean to do it, but he harmed his mother and Yeosang just couldn't sit and watch anymore. You have never had an easy life. You were sold off at a young age, then bought, then sold, then bought again and sold again. It was a neverending cycle. You were just a toy for men to use and then disregard of; you wanted to disappear. And one man almost granted your wish, he killed you, or so he thought...and so did you. But an angel, a kind-hearted man, saved you from your terrible fate. You found a family, just like he did so many years ago. Yeosang was your angel. (Reader is called Jung Hana in the following oneshots.)

A/N: I'm baack!! *sighs* this part is a harsh one imo, nothing is very detailed but it's heavily packed with emotions; I hope I covered everything in the warnings. For better understatement, once again, I heavily advise you read San's part (why is it always about him haha) and the other parts too ofc because everything is tightly woven together and you'll have a better understanding of the whole story and world building!!! If you want to be tagged just let me know and share your thoughts! Happy reading!

Taglist: @pingyu-in-wonderland @marievllr-abg @lelaleleb @loveforred @horanghae8 @jeonghanscarat7 @orshii @mundayoonimnida @m3tavita @silentcry329 @icarusignite @cooljuni

Series Masterlist ↭ Previous Part

Everything was cold. Painfully cold. The heavy wind and salty water were freezing, numbing, as the sea pulled me further away from the cliff. From the shore. Away from the atrocious monsters called humans. A painful cough tore through my lungs as a wave crashed into my body, sending me down under, before I was pulled back to the surface by the same wave, nose and throat stinging from the salt. I wanted to scream. The pain was unbearable, but my throat was sore and my eyes so swelled up that I couldn’t see anymore. What would I scream for? For help? To be back between the evil claws of men? Then, I would rather accept my fate and succumb to the darkness. At least it was quiet there, safe, and finally…I’d have solitude. Nobody would touch me, nobody would degrade me, nobody would violate me anymore. That brought serenity upon my spasming muscles as they finally relaxed, finally giving in to the cold. There was no use in fighting against it. If the Gods didn’t find my life entertaining enough anymore, then they probably wanted to get rid of me right now. And that would mean a certain death. Lost in the sea, sinking down under as wave after wave washed me away. The thought didn’t seem too scary, nor sad, and I found myself smiling. For the first time in ages, I was smiling as another wave crashed into my body, whipping me around and around, nose and mouth filled with water. It didn’t hurt anymore as my brain seemed to shut down, the clatter of my teeth barely there. I wanted to see the sky for one last time before the darkness would take its claim on me, saving me from my misery. But when I opened my eyes, I couldn’t see much other than darkness. Everywhere. Above and around. Have I died, then? Did the Gods drag me to hell finally? Why was it still so painful then? So cold and terrifying? What if the man hasn’t had enough with me and came to fish me out the sea? What if terror would follow me even after my demise? What if I wasn’t allowed to ever rest? To ever be happy? What if the Gods hated me and were punishing me for all the wrongdoings I have done? Which weren’t many, but they hated sinners. Everyone said that. Everyone knew that. Did Heaven exist? What if they didn’t want me there? I would’ve chuckled if I could’ve, but my body wasn’t working anymore, it was dead weight. I couldn’t fight back anymore; I couldn’t hold on anymore. So, I closed my eyes and let a long breath out, emptying my lungs, not wanting to make the process longer than necessary. As if the Gods succumbed to my final cry of pity, a harsh wave sent my body underwater, cold tentacles wrapping around my body, pulling me even further under. It felt like I was wrapped up in an icy cocoon, void of air as my lungs started quickly screaming for oxygen. I didn’t feel the need to fight back, to try and swim up to the surface, to save myself. What was the point of living if life was so miserable?

If I was being used day and night to others pleasure, my wants and needs completely disregarded? What was the point of trying to save myself when I’ve been desperately wishing to die already, to just drop dead in the middle of the day or night, to be free of so much horror this awful life has put me through? If I would’ve had any tears left, I would’ve been sobbing by now, shouting in agony and asking ‘Why me?’. But I just smiled, choking on nothing but pure salt and water, body convulsing in awful ways despite my serene thoughts. There was no need to do this, to try and fight back, even if it was a normal human reaction. I welcomed it with open arms, content with the sudden turn of my fate. If the Gods wanted to drag me to hell, I wanted it too. If they wanted to do it right now, I thanked them for it. And it did feel like someone’s grip was around my wrist, strong and burning, as it pulled me towards themselves, but it didn’t feel like I was sinking anymore. It didn’t feel like I was being dragged towards Hell anymore, it felt like I was getting closer to the surface with each passing second and if my body wouldn’t have been on the verge of blacking out, on the verge of dying, I would’ve kicked and scratched, fighting the saving grip off myself. But my vision blackened and my lungs burned, skin like ice, as everything faded around me. Sounds muted, senses vaned and darkness engulfed my whole being, body going limp. Finally, I have let go.

I imagined this is what it felt like resurfacing from underwater once your lungs were left with no oxygen, gasping loudly and frantically for air as my eyes opened and I shot up in a sitting position. My heart was beating fast and my lungs burning as I took quick breaths, body panicked and on high-alert as my eyes adjusted to the darkness. It was so dark in here, not even the small window provided enough light for me to see my surroundings. My body was tense, muscles sore and screaming in pain as tears filled my eyes, realizing I was in a bed. A bed which had soft blankets and a pillow which smelled like flowers. I was back in the hands of my tormentors, but then why was this place rocking from left to right? Why did I hear waves crashing against the house? Why was the wind howling so loudly, sending chills down my back? As if reminded about my back, my body finally caught up with my brain and the pain finally seeped through my veins, to every inch of my abused body. It felt like my skin was being ripped open once again, cut with the sharp blade of the knife, abused and abused relentlessly. I couldn’t help the despaired cry which left my lips, clutching the blankets tightly in my balled-up fists as I bit my lower lip harshly, on the verge of crying out again from the aching of my whole being. It was so strong that my head started pulsing, making me light headed as I was about to fall backwards, but the only room to the door was quickly opened. My eyes had adjusted to the darkness by now, but the little light was welcomed as a figure walked inside the room, their actions rushed as they quickly closed the door behind them. I frowned, whimpering from the pain again, as I tried to make out who the person inside the room was, only to gasp when they stepped further inside, candlelight illuminating their face. It was a man. His features were very soft, almost as if he was carefully drawn and then painted by the Gods before he was brought to life. Perhaps in a different setting and in an earlier stage of life, this man wouldn’t have seemed like a threat. I have met too many angelic faced men with cruel intentions to not recoil from this one’s touch as his hand reached out, freezing midair as I scooted backwards. The man seemed shocked and sad at the same time, eyebrows lightly furrowing before he lowered his arm.

“My name is Kang Yeosang,” The man suddenly spoke up quietly, almost in a whisper, and his deep voice did not match his angelic features, “I’m somewhat of a doctor, I know how to heal certain sicknesses and how to patch people up, you don’t have to be scared of me. I’m just here to heal your wounds, but before I do that, I need to see if you have a fever.”

His words carried through the room, slowly reaching my brain just as Yeosang raised an inquiring eyebrow. How could I believe him? What if he was just lying for me to trust him and give in to him easier, allow him to touch me? I quickly shook my head and scooted further up on the bed, back colliding with the harsh wooden wall, a yelp leaving my lips at the throbbing ache which traveled through my spine at the contact. Tears sprung into my eyes instantly and I held a hand over my mouth, lips trembling in fear and pain.

“I’m sorry, I—” Yeosang seemed to be at a loss of words as he gazed at me with so much sadness on his face, “Your back is—very bruised, I know it hurts a lot. Your body has been through a lot, so just…please, let me heal you. I will only touch your forehead to see if you have a fever, I promise.”

Everything in my body screamed to scamper off the bed and run away, but where to? Where even was I? The candlelight wasn’t strong enough to light up the room, but it was enough to see how small it was and how little furniture was inside it. And the constant rocking wasn’t normal either. I dared to look up into the eyes of the angelic man and I found no malice in them. Could he be genuine? Or was he just a very talented actor? Before I could doubt him more, another painful throb racked my whole body and I whined, shutting my eyes tightly closed, head lightly falling forward. Yeosang didn’t reach out to me, but he tensed as he slightly moved closer to the bed. I waited a second for the pain to dissipate, but nothing happened, so I raised my head and looked at Yeosang, who was waiting patiently and keeping his distance. Did I have much of a choice? When was I even allowed to choose something? So, with a shuddering breath, I nodded slowly and Yeosang’s face instantly relaxed, seemingly glad that I allowed him to inspect my temperature. His hand reached out again and my muscles tensed as I brought my legs to my chest, body screaming at me to stop moving, but I felt exposed as he leaned closer. A small smile, which looked comforting, appeared on his lips as his fingers lightly brushed against my forehead, making me shudder, before his warm palm was pressed firmly against my skin. I stopped breathing as my lips trembled and gazed into the beautiful man’s eyes as his eyebrows furrowed, eyes slightly closing. I wasn’t cold anymore, but his palm was a lot warmer than I was and the press of his hand made my headache slightly disappear. But then, his hand was gone as soon as it came, and I looked at him surprised, not expecting him to keep his words. His eyebrows furrowed as he shook his head, mumbling something to himself as he suddenly started walking towards the door.

“I’ll be right back, don’t be scared.” He said softly and I just looked away, hoping he wouldn’t see the tears in my eyes. It wasn’t that easy to not be scared. So far, he seemed to be honest and do as he said, but I couldn’t trust him. Not yet, not when I was so vulnerable and he might be acting just for me to start trusting him. I couldn’t fall in his trap. Men were sly and they used anything they could against you, I wasn’t in the physical state to fight back if he tried to harm me more, not that I usually could. As I sniffed, wiping a few tears off my cheeks, the door opened again and I looked up alarmed, watching as Yeosang walked in with two different cups in his hands, shutting the door quietly behind himself. He paused for a second, his eyes running over my face before he quietly sighed, licking his lips as he spoke up, “I brought you two different herbal teas. One is to boost your immune system and help your wounds heal faster, and the other is to lessen your pain and allow your muscles to build themselves back up faster.”

I gulped once he finished explaining and my eyes looked between the two ceramic cups, gulping thirstily. It only occurred to me now how thirsty I was and how sore my throat felt. Even if I wanted to speak, I probably wouldn’t have been able to. I looked back at Yeosang, who was watching me expectantly but very patiently, slightly extending his hands towards me to take the two cups. What if he tried to poison me? To kill me? Wouldn’t then my wish become reality? I’d be finally free. The thought of that and the constant aching of my back and muscles made me take a rash decision as I blindly trusted this angel faced stranger and took the cup in his left hand, an encouraging smile appearing on Yeosang’s lips as I brought the cup to my lips. It was still steaming, the cup warm to my touch, and I smelled it first, only to be met with a pleasant flower like scent. It was sweet and I allowed the warm liquid to pour down my throat, almost crying at the soothing feeling, thankful to have something finally hydrate my wrecked body. The taste was velvety and sweet, like I had expected, for a herbal tea it didn’t taste too bad. Yeosang’s smile seemed to widen as he watched my reaction and then eagerly handed me the other cup, taking the empty one as I quickly drank the contents of this cup too, desperate for something which would relieve me of the pain. This one’s taste was bitter and sour at the same time, it made me gag a little bit as I shuddered, squeezing my eyes shut tightly. I heard a chuckle and as I opened my eyes, Yeosang had an embarrassed look on his face. He took the empty cup as I handed it to him and cleared his throat.

“Sorry, this one tastes a bit awful; I know, I haven’t found the matching ingredient for it yet to sweeten it.” I nodded upon Yeosang’s explanation and watched him for a second longer, taking in his features. He seemed tall, at least taller than me, and his frame was well-built but his muscles weren’t bulging uglily. His black hair was longer and beside the few strands which framed his chiseled face, the rest was pushed behind his ears. His round eyes watched me softly and his pink lips were pulled in a comforting smile, he looked like he was pitying me. I watched the discoloration next to his left eye and cheekbone, wondering what caused the redness of his flawlessly frail skin. He was tanner than me, but then again, I was as white as a wall. I averted my eyes, realizing that I was staring and he could see it and noticed how drowsy I started becoming. My headache became dull and I noticed how the aching of my body didn’t seem so unbearable anymore as I lay on my side, feeling Yeosang’s watchful eyes on me. He didn’t move and I didn’t have the energy to stay alert as my body succumbed to fatigue. My eyelids fluttered shut and I sighed loudly, feeling the weight of the warm blanket fall over my petite form. Darkness abducted me for a second time tonight, but this time it didn’t feel so menacing, so final.

Normally, I would have never slept through the night without waking up shaking in fear, having to wipe my tears away as my mind was plagued with nightmares. Normally, I wasn’t even allowed to sleep throughout the whole night as men came and went whenever they wanted to, no such thing as rest was allowed at the brothel. Or the torture house, as I had started referring to it years ago. But something in the teas Yeosang offered to me must’ve had some anesthetics as I hadn’t even woken up to the thunderstorm ripping through the place currently. There was something very comforting about storms, but I could never truly sleep during one, the thunder oddly reminded me of screaming men who berated you and then punished you for not listening to them. I only woke up when the faint clanking of porcelain registered not far from my head, which was still pounding, but not as painfully as last night. My eyebrows furrowed as I shoved my face further into the flower-scented pillow, until the aching of my back caught up with my brain and I realized where I was. Eyes flew open and I shot up, scrambling back into the wooden wall when I realized how close the angelic faced man was standing to me. Yeosang, was his name, I remembered. He looked just as startled as me as he stared back wide eyed, hands hovering in the air above the tray he was holding seconds ago. My heart was beating fast as I stared at him, biting my bottom lip as the entirety of my back was pulsing, thighs sore and right ankle throbbing.

“Oh,” Yeosang mumbled, looking lost as he looked between himself and the bed, he was standing by the bedside table, “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you awake.”

I remained silent as I watched the man fumble around for a second until he stepped back, scratching the back of his head, “You really shouldn’t press your back against anything right now, Miss.”

He said he was a doctor; his constant attention to my actions was probably because he knew better what was wrong or right for my body, but I couldn’t move. I was scared to. What if he really was just acting to gain my trust and then use me like so many others have before him? My brain was screaming at me to move away from the wall, the pain was becoming too much, but then I would get closer to him, making it easier for him to reach out for me. I couldn’t do that.

“Alright,” Yeosang mumbled a little defeated when he realized I wouldn’t move and he looked around at a loss before his eyes fell back on the tray, “I brought your breakfast. We don’t have much food on the ship right now, but I saved some rice for you.”

Ship? For the first time, I allowed my eyes to look around the room, to take in my surroundings. Everything was made out of dark, sturdy wood. The room was relatively small, but still bigger than the room I was allowed to inhabit back at the brothel. It had the necessities only, the bed I was sitting on, a nightstand with a vase and a white lily in it, a desk which was full of chests of different sizes, a chair next to it, and a wardrobe. The house was still rocking from left to right, albeit a bit harsher compared to last night. But I wasn’t in a house, I wasn’t on land anymore. I was on a ship, trapped here even if I wished to run away. The thought sent panic through my veins and my breathing accelerated, but as I looked at Yeosang, the helplessness in his eyes somehow calmed me down. He really didn’t seem harmful, but I could never be too sure. He looked like he didn’t know what to do as he stared at me and I looked away, embarrassed. My eyes fell back on the nightstand and suddenly, my stomach rumbled loudly. I bit my lower lip and refused to look at Yeosang as my cheeks flushed. I haven’t even realized up until now how hungry I was.

“It’s simple rice and a boiled egg, you really should eat, Miss, your body is too weak. It won’t recover if you don’t feed it.” His voice sounded desperate as he spoke up and I nodded wordlessly, reluctantly reaching for the tray. But it pulled a muscle in my back and I hissed as a strong pang of pain traveled from my shoulders to the center of my back, making Yeosang slightly step towards me, but when my wide eyes looked up at him, he froze. He bowed his head and took a step back, a good four steps away from the bed now. He was standing in the middle of the room, hands clasped in front of him and head bowed. For a second, the image of him almost covering in front of me made me feel bad, but it didn’t last for long as I realized it could be an act. I reached for the bowl of food and fork, quickly pressing back against the wall, ignoring the pain, inhaling the food in mere minutes. Yeosang remained quiet as he watched me eat, I couldn’t care less what I looked like since I hadn’t had a meal in three days. Despite the rice being simple it tasted amazing, and it wasn’t because I was so famished, it was because the cook did a very good job. I ate the egg too, licking the fork clean once I was finished with my breakfast, looking back up at Yeosang with grateful eyes. I was still a bit hungry, but it was nothing I couldn’t deal with, I was used to it. A big smile appeared on Yeosang’s face and he nodded happily, reaching out to take the bowl, but I quickly placed it on the edge of the bed, scared of any contact. His smile slightly fell, but he quickly fixed his expression and took the bowl, placing it back onto the tray, and cleared his throat.

“Wooyoung is quite the cook, isn’t he?” I glanced at him but said nothing, and after waiting for a few seconds, he continued awkwardly, “Yeah, uh, I brought some more medicine. It’s the same from last night, but I added a little ginger into the sour one so it won’t taste good still, sorry. But it’s important for your immune system, anyways, it will make you sleepy but it’s good if you sleep, you heal faster, did you know that?”

Yeosang’s eyebrows raised in question and I shook my head no, the information new to me. Yeosang grinned and extended the two little cups towards me, which I took cautiously, making sure our fingers didn’t touch by accident. I drank the contents of it, cringing more from the taste of ginger, making Yeosang chuckle as he took the cups back once I placed them on the edge of the bed.

“I know not everyone likes ginger, it once made Mingi throw up when he was sick and I prepared a tea for him, but I personally really like it. It’s a bit spicy, but very tasty, and—” Yeosang sucked in a deep breath as I stared at him wide eyed, taken aback by his chatty personality, “Sorry, I ramble a lot. I figure you might not be used to that, I’m sorry. I don’t mean to make you uncomfortable by any means.”

I fought the muscles of my face as they threatened to pull up into a smile and instead lowered my head before I nodded, uncomfortable silence engulfing us. Yeosang hesitated for a few seconds before he cleared his throat, “You should lay down, take pressure off your back. I’m going to leave you alone until lunch. Nobody will bother you; do you want me to lock the door?”

If he locked the door, did it mean nobody but him could enter? He would also trap me in here, defenseless, but once again, we were on a ship. It’s not like I could run away. The most I could do was jump into the sea and die. The thought of dying, all of a sudden, didn’t sound as comforting as last night. It was foreign. Peeking up at Yeosang through my lashes, I nodded to let him know that I wanted him to lock the door. Yeosang humped and grabbed the tray off the nightstand, eyes falling on me when I moved to lay on my back, wincing and gasping at the pain, tears springing into my eyes. The headache was still dull, but it couldn’t be compared to the ache of the rest of my body, I could only hope the medicine would make its effects quickly, lulling me to sleep where I wouldn’t feel anything. I could only hope to have a dreamless rest, my body probably wouldn’t be able to cope with torment even in my dreams. I let out a shaky breath as I tried to relax against the sheets, but my back was burning, and a few tears started rolling down my cheeks.

“Stop laying on your back.” Yeosang’s soft voice suddenly turned stern and my eyes snapped up to look at him, his eyebrows were furrowed and he looked distressed. He also looked angry. I have misbehaved. Punishment would follow. My lips started trembling at the thought, knowing very well my body wasn’t able to take any more abuse, and all I could do was start crying harder, shaking my head no and looking at Yeosang pleadingly. His anger dissipated instantly and his eyes widened as he took a step towards me, but I whimpered and he froze again, looking confused and guilty at the same time, “I’m sorry, I didn’t—I didn’t mean to—please don’t be scared of me.”

His voice was pleading and his lips were downturned as his eyebrows furrowed, looking at me with sadness written all over his face, “I won’t harm you; I just don’t want your wounds to worsen. You should stop laying on your back and pressing it against the wall until it’s somewhat healed, please. Sleep on your front, if you can, or turn to the side—nothing will happen to you while you’re here, alright?”

His words did no good as my mind was ready for anything, ready to take the blows and the screams. I couldn’t help but cry more as I struggled to turn onto my stomach, muscles screaming in pain and body trembling. Yeosang watched me speechless, grip tightening around the tray. His words were my command, there were few things I wouldn’t do if he asked me. I buried my face in the pillow, my tears wetting it as I felt movement next to me and before I could turn and look, the door to the room opened and closed, a key locking it before I could hear Yeosang’s footsteps walking away hurriedly. He was the first man who didn’t yell at me for not listening to him. He was the first man who walked away instead of antagonizing me.

The day passed by in a blur, Yeosang was back when it was lunchtime but he didn’t stay for long and he didn’t say much. I took the medicine, a different kind of tea this time, and went back to sleep as the rocking of the ship was making me feel nauseous. Besides, I had nothing else to do and the dull ache of my body exhausted me beyond like anything else, even if all I did was lay in bed all day. But I woke up a few hours after lunch and found myself wide awake for the first time. The wounds decorating my back were pulsing, but it wasn’t as unbearable as the sharp pangs of pain which seemed to plague my system before the medicine I took during lunch. My head stopped thumping and for the first time it felt like it was truly above the surface. My thighs were sore and despite me trying to massage them nothing much happened. I also noticed for the first time the bandages wrapped around my ankle and around the few cuts on my biceps. I finally felt the soft cloth pressed against my back, and I realized Yeosang had bandaged me up the second he found me. My heart warmed at the thought, but I couldn’t trust him just yet. He could be acting. He could be playing me. He could be helping me just to sell me off once again once I get better. Men weren’t trustworthy, I have learned that a long time ago.

Having turned onto my side, I was facing the little circle window of the room and I could see the cloudy sky and the sea when a wave crashed against the ship. I was curious as to where we were, whether we were close to the shore or far away; I have never been on a ship before. I had no idea what the sea looked like once you were sailing it. I never had the luxuries of trying out such mundane things as travelling. It was truly depressing. Feeling curious and courageous, I pushed myself up into a sitting position and allowed my feet to dangle off the bed. My pink dress was dirty and torn, I hadn’t even thought about that until now. But I had no spare dresses, so I couldn’t change into anything else. I looked down at myself and noticed the fabric was ripped around my breasts, the outer layer missing, a sheer cloth the only thing hiding my body from view. I was used to being naked, it meant nothing to me, it brought no feeling of shame anymore. I took a deep breath and looked towards the window once again, dusk and the stormy clouds casted a gloomy veil over the room. It wouldn’t hurt anyone if I looked out the window, so I scooted lower on the bed until my feet touched the wooden floor. It was cold at first and I hissed as I stood, suddenly remembering all the shards I ran over when I was trying to get away from that monster. My feet were cut up. It made me wonder if there was at least one little nook on my body which was healthy, untouched currently. Probably not. I bit my lower lip as I slowly took off towards the window, it felt like I was walking on shards all over again, yet there were none here. I barely got to the desk, when I heard the door being unlocked and it swiftly opened behind me. My body went rigid, goosebumps erupting on my skin as someone walked inside, slamming the door shut behind them.

“Miss! You can’t do that!” The deep voice whisper-shouted at me and my hands curled up into fists, body starting to tremble as panic and annoyance oozed from Yeosang’s voice, “Your feet are all cut up!”

I heard him shuffling behind me, but I couldn’t move. I was frozen to my spot, closing my eyes and awaiting the repercussions of my mistakes. After all those years, I really should have known better. You never disobey your master. You never step out of line and you never do anything by yourself, unless you were previously told to. If a beating followed, I would truly deserve it. Yeosang never said I couldn’t walk around before, but he also never said I could. So I took a deep breath and braced myself for the blows as I heard him place the tray on the nightstand forcefully, footsteps storming towards me. My body couldn’t take much, perhaps, I would die tonight at the hands of the doctor. But the expected pain never came as suddenly I felt an arm bending my knees from behind meanwhile another arm went around my shoulders. I was hoisted up into the air before pulled against a firm chest, strong arms holding me snugly against his body as if I weighted nothing. I didn’t think my body could tense even more, but my muscles were screaming at me from how tense I was, it felt like my wounds were opening up once again. My whole body trembled as Yeosang’s warmth seeped into my cold skin, his flowery scent dominant now that I was so close to him. He seemed tense too as he hurried us over to the bed and I closed my eyes when I felt myself being moved again, and I still didn’t open them when I was sat on the edge of the bed, Yeosang’s breathing loud as he stood close. Too close. My body shivered at the loss of warmth and suddenly, the flowery scent was gone and so was the nerve-wrecking proximity of Yeosang. But his gaze was still on me, I could feel it, it was burning into the top of my head as it was lowered. My lips trembled as I fumbled with my fingers in my lap and as the silence was even more prolonged, I couldn’t take it anymore.

“I’m—I’m sorry—” My voice sounded hollow, croaked as I hadn’t spoken in two days. It seems like my throat was still healing from the gut wrenching screams I let out just days ago, “I didn’t—I didn’t know I wasn’t—”

“Miss.” Yeosang’s deep voice was soft and coated with anguish as he cut me off, “Don’t apologize. I didn’t tell you that you shouldn’t walk for now, I am the one sorry. I shouldn’t have frightened you like that nor carried you—I’m sorry, I just panicked. Your wounds are fragile and they can open up anytime, especially the ones on your feet.”

My skin tingled and didn’t feel as cold as before, but I didn’t dare look up at Yeosang. He exuded no negative feelings, but I didn’t want to test my luck. Eye contact could be a show of defiance, of provoking, and I hoped to avoid both.

“I brought you dinner and medicine.” Yeosang mumbled quietly and I nodded as I looked towards the tray on the nightstand. Indeed, there was some rice and stew in a bowl. I reached for it and the fork and quickly dug into it, eyes filling with tears. I sniffed a few times as I devoured my dinner, so thankful to have three meals a day after so many years. My tummy hurt from so much food, but I refused to let even a drop of rice go to waste. Food was precious and I wasn’t going to act ungrateful even if my body refused to intake anymore. When I finished my dinner I dared to look up at Yeosang, and surprisingly he was smiling as he grabbed the two cups of tea. I quickly placed the bowl back on the tray and took the cups from him, hurriedly chugging them down. I noticed another jug in plus and figured it was just water as Yeosang went to place it on the nightstand instead of the tray. My eyes widened once I realized there was no sour taste this time and Yeosang smiled sheepishly, taking the cups from me and placing them back on the tray.

“I finally found the combination,” He said with a chuckle, grinning, “It’s unfortunate that it’s because of your injuries, but it’s also good because from now on it’ll taste good.”

I nodded once and watched Yeosang as he slightly blushed before turning around and grabbing something off the wooden chair. They were clothes. He turned back to face me and took a step towards me. My body tensed, but I didn’t scramble away like before. Yeosang seemed hesitant to take another step, but as I watched him wide eyed, he did, and then extended his hand. I looked at the clothes before back at him, confused.

“I figured you’d like some fresh clothes, yours are…quite damaged.” Damaged was a nice way of saying it, I took the clothes from him with a nod of gratitude, “There are two girls on the ship, so the undergarments and the pants are from them, I figured those would fit you better than mine. I also brought a clean shirt of mine, you can feel free to wear it, I have many more of those.”

Two other girls on the ship? What kind of ship was I on if only two other girls were here besides me? Perhaps I didn’t want to know the answer to that. I bowed my head at Yeosang once again and he smiled, pausing for a second. I placed the clothes next to me on the bed and gripped the front of my damaged dress, tearing the fabric apart, not that it mattered much. That dress was worth nothing at this point. I wore nothing underneath it and goosebumps erupted on my skin as the cool air hit my exposed chest. A gasp left Yeosang’s lips and as I looked up, his face was red and he whirled around rigidly, body tense. My eyebrows furrowed as I paused, looking at him confused. What happened? Did I do something wrong? Did he…not like my body?

“Why…” My voice faltered as I stared at the back of Yeosang’s head, “Why did you turn around?”

“Why—” Yeosang almost exclaimed, voice alarmed, “Because it’s inappropriate for me to watch a woman undress! You’re naked, I—I need to offer you privacy.”

My eyes remained on his strong back, mouth slightly opening in amazement. I watched as the back of his neck flamed, ears turning red too. This man had turned around because I was undressing. Because I was exposing myself to him. Because he was offering me privacy? My lips started trembling and I took in a shaky breath, about to speak up, but Yeosang beat me to it, “I will see you in the morning, Miss, sleep well.”

Sleep well? Since when was the last time anyone wished me that? My eyes were glued to Yeosang as he stormed out of the room, not even once trying to peek at me, he even brought his left hand up to shield his eyes from my naked torso. As soon as the door was locked, I broke down, tears falling freely as my body rocked with sobs, hands working gently to undress myself, having to stand for a little while to wear the undergarments and the pants. I have never been offered privacy before. Not by men, not by women. I couldn’t help but allow my heart to warm a little, silencing the voices in my head. If he truly was just acting, why would he show respect? Men never did that, not even when they were acting. As I buttoned up Yeosang’s clean shirt, I realized that too smelled like flowers. As I got under the thick covers, I couldn’t help but cry myself to sleep as my body has never felt so warm and comfortable before. The alarm bells silent in my mind for the first time.

It was my second day on the ship, and despite the freshness of my wounds, they didn’t hurt as much as I was expecting them to. Yeosang truly was a doctor, his teas were already making their effect. I still couldn’t trust him, but the way the burning of my back would fade into a rhythmic pulsing after each time I drank the medicine was confirmation enough that he wasn’t lying about his identity. I felt grateful, but I couldn’t trust him just yet. It was too soon. I was laying on my side, gazing out the window, thoughts wrapped up in a fantasy world where I was on a boat, out on the sea fishing, on a blazing hot summer day. I haven’t been to my home Kingdom in ages, I wondered if my parents were still alive, if they even remembered me. I couldn’t remember them much, but I could recount the path to our house, and I still remembered the days when my father would take me fishing with himself. These were the only memories of my childhood; these were the only escape my mind could grab onto when things became too hard to cope with. I slightly tensed when I heard knocking on the door, wondering who it could be since Yeosang never knocked before unlocking the door. It also couldn’t have been lunch time, he usually brought food later in the afternoon. I grimaced as I quickly sat up when the door was unlocked and watched with wide eyes as Yeosang slipped inside the room, peeking out cautiously before he closed the door softly and locked it again. Whenever he brought food he didn’t lock the door. My heartbeat picked up as I stared at him, taking in his attire. He wore black leather pants with a black sleeveless t-shirt tucked inside them, a brown leather belt snug around his waist. His black hair was pushed behind his ears and I just noticed two bobby pins securing them. My eyes fell onto the tray he was carrying and my heartbeat picked up even more as there was a big bowl of water and a few rags next to it. What did he plan on doing to me?

“It’s not yet lunchtime.” Yeosang spoke up, seemingly frozen in front of the door, “But I have to change your bandages so that your wounds don’t get infected. It’s the only free time I have from my duties, I hope I’m not intruding.”

Intruding on what? I almost chuckled, but instead just lowered my gaze to the bed and shook my head no, making Yeosang nod to himself. He walked further inside the room and placed the tray down on the nightstand. It looked heavy, the muscles of his biceps were bulging until he placed the tray down. Wasn’t he doing too much for me? At the brothel no one would even check up on me, let alone try and change my bandages. I pushed the warm blanket off my body and sat up fully, scooting towards the edge of the bed, not quite knowing how Yeosang wanted to proceed with this. I watched as he walked up to the desk and opened the largest chest, which was full of gauze. He took one roll into his hand before closing it, then opened the one to its left, slightly smaller than the previous chest. This one was filled with vials and different little metallic containers. Yeosang’s lips pursed as his eyes ran over the different contents, until they stopped on a black tin can. He hummed and took that one out, closing the chest and opening the smaller one in front of it, swiftly grabbing a lidded tube which contained a yellowish liquid. Yeosang turned to face me and froze for a second, seemingly taken aback by me watching him and waiting for him at the edge of the bed. My face remained expressionless as he blushed, even though I was trying very hard not to smile. He seemed cute for a second, until my brain decided to remind me that he was just acting. Trying to gain my trust.

“So, uhm, I will start by patching up your feet,” He mumbled as he came closer, making my body slightly tense at the proximity. He gently placed down every item in his hands on the floor before grabbing the bowl and rags and doing the same. I watched with furrowed eyebrows as he sat on the floor, right where my legs were dangling. Why was he sitting there? Shouldn’t he have gotten on the bed instead?

“Is it fine if I touch your feet?” My eyebrows furrowed as Yeosang looked up at me expectantly, and I nodded dumbly, trying to asses the situation. Why was he even asking for permission? He was only touching my feet, “Alright, I will clean your feet with water first and then apply a minty ointment on them, it might sting at first, but it’s very good for inflammation. It kills anything which isn’t supposed to be inside your wounds.”

The last bit sounded disgusting and my face scrunched up involuntarily, making Yeosang chuckle. He scooted a bit closer and then looked up in my eyes, gaze soft, “Ready?”

“Ready.” I found myself whispering back, enticed by his gaze and his deep voice, making Yeosang’s eyes widen at the sound of my voice. He smiled to himself before he quickly looked down and tentatively touched my left foot, his hands slightly colder than my own skin. I flinched a bit and Yeosang muttered a quiet sorry, before he grasped my foot firmly, raising it so he could inspect it. His eyebrows slightly furrowed and then he dipped the rag into the water and quickly got to work, cleaning my foot.

“They look a lot better compared to when I found you, Miss.” His voice sounded happy as he informed me, gently pressing against my skin here and there with the rag. The water was warm, and it felt actually nice to have my feet cleaned, after walking on it, I’m sure I had drawn a little blood. Yeosang’s calloused hands were soft and very careful as he slightly massaged my ankles once he disregarded the rag and then grabbed the tin can, opening it with one hand. He scooped out a copious amount of white ointment and then gently started rubbing it against the cut wounds. My eyebrows furrowed and I hissed as I went to yank my feet away, but Yeosang was faster and caught my ankles, keeping me in place. It did sting, a lot, actually, but as soon as it came it was already gone, leaving me flabbergasted.

“It’s an uncomfortable feeling, I know. I’ve had my fair share of this ointment as well,” Yeosang explained as he applied some more, this time the sting less intense, “But trust me when I say this…it does wonders, your feet will be healed in no time!”

Yeosang’s little exclamation made my eyebrows raise in surprise and he blushed again as he looked up at me, averting his eyes quickly as I tried to fight the smile off my lips. How was it possible that he could make me smile so easily? Why did my body feel like it was buzzing with life in the mere presence of him? He was a man I couldn’t trust yet, but his demeanor made that rather hard to accomplish. However, the walls built around my heart and mind were stronger than this, they wouldn’t allow me to slip and blindly offer my trust to him. I just couldn’t.

“Your feet are all done.” Yeosang said with a smile and scooted back, looking up at me, “How are your thighs? Still bruised, right?”

I nodded wordlessly and lowered my head, hiding my embarrassment as Yeosang just hummed and got up from the floor, walking to the desk. I peeked at him and watched as he opened the drawer of the desk and grabbed a black tube before he walked back to me. My body tensed at the proximity again; I couldn’t help it; it was a subconscious answer at this point. If Yeosang noticed, he said nothing about it, just placed the tube on the nightstand and pointed at it, “You should smear this over the bruises—after I have left, of course!”

He was quick to add that in, eyes widened, probably remembering how quick and unashamed I was to undress in front of him. I couldn’t help but grin and as Yeosang blushed, again, I bit my lower lip and averted my eyes, waiting for what he wished to do next. Yeosang cleared his throat and pushed the stray hair strands out of his face as he leaned down to grab the wet rag and the vial of yellowish liquid, “I’m sorry, but I have to clean your back too. You—you have to take off your shirt for that…”

Yeosang and I looked into each other’s eyes as his words seemed to hang in the air between us, filled with tension. I had no problem with taking off my shirt, but he seemed uncomfortable. It was very strange, uncommon. Yeosang’s eyebrows were furrowed as I went to unbutton the shirt and he quickly looked away, “I normally wouldn’t ask such thing of you, Miss, but there’s no other way to treat the wounds on your back. You can lay down on your front or stay sitting and hold the shirt to your chest, whichever makes you less uncomfortable.”

“I don’t have a problem with you seeing me naked.” I couldn’t help but let the words slip out as I stared at Yeosang’s profile. He sucked in a harsh breath and shook his head, eyebrows furrowing.

“That’s—that’s not how you’re supposed to think, Miss.” Yeosang mumbled and my own eyebrows furrowed, “It’s your body. Nobody should be able to see you so vulnerable unless you want them to. Everyone needs to be respected, you included.”

I stood staring at him, mouth slightly falling open as his words whirled around in my head, something deep in my chest breaking. Respect? I can’t remember a time when anyone respected me. The tears in my eyes were quick to surface, but I managed to keep them from falling, managed to gulp and suppress the urge of wanting to sob into his chest. He was being so nice. He was treating me like a human being, not like an item.

“I’m making you feel uncomfortable.” I suddenly realized, “I keep acting like a harlot.”

“Miss, don’t say that!” Yeosang was quick to interject, eyes widening as he finally looked at me. There was a fire in his eyes, so strong and burning, that for a second I was left breathless. He looked angry, sad, and determined at the same time as he shook his head, “Don’t ever say that about yourself! Don’t let anyone make you feel something you’re not. And don’t degrade yourself.”

The intensity in his eyes made me nod without much thought, drinking in his words. Even if I wanted to contradict him, I wouldn’t have been able to. He seemed to firmly believe his words, and I couldn’t help but believe him. I settled for a simple question, instead, “Do you mind if I don’t lay down?”

It brought back unpleasant memories and I couldn’t do it right now, not when my mind felt like a mess. When my heart couldn’t decide what to stand for. Would a man who was acting be so sincere and fired about what a woman calls herself?

“Of course not, as long as it makes you comfortable, I am comfortable too.” Tears sprung to my eyes again and I nodded, biting my lower lip and averting my gaze from him. My fingers went to grip the buttons of my shirt again, but this time I paused, and cleared my throat quietly.

“Then, I’m going to take off my shirt.” Yeosang said nothing as he turned around, his back facing me. I stared at him for a few seconds before undoing the buttons, fingers lightly shaking from the flood of emotions I was experiencing after such long time of feeling nothing but numbness. These were positive feelings; I couldn’t even decide whether to cry or laugh. Instead, I settled on chewing my lower lip nervously, fighting those tears from falling. My chest felt heavy, but I ignored it as I turned to the side, facing the wall, and pressed the shirt to my chest to make Yeosang feel comfortable, concealing my naked chest, “I’m ready.”

“Good, I will sit behind you then.” Yeosang informed and turned to the left without looking at me, keeping his eyes fixed to the floor. I watched him closely, the red spots on his temple and cheek catching my eyes again. I wondered what those were. I have never seen anything like it on anyone else. I turned my head towards the wall when I couldn’t watch Yeosang anymore and I felt the bed dip behind me, flowery scent invading my nostrils as my body tensed up once again. My arms were covered in goosebumps and I took in a shaky breath when Yeosang shifted closer, his knee lightly grazing against my waist. I knew he had to get close in order to change the bandages, but it still felt nerve-wracking.

“May I touch you? Are you alright?” A stray tear rolled down my cheek and I nodded wordlessly, knowing that my voice would betray me right now. His attentive behavior and constant asking for consent was becoming too much. I felt Yeosang sighing behind me, his hot breath hitting my left shoulder, before careful fingers started peeling the gauze off my back. I shuddered at the feeling, despite it not being painful, my skin burned as the protective layer disappeared. I felt exposed and I couldn’t help but sniff loudly when the gauze was fully off my back. Yeosang paused, “Are you okay?”

“Yes, continue.” I whispered, clutching the shirt tightly in my hands as I felt Yeosang moving behind me. The dirty gauze was dropped to the floor and I dared take a glance at it, it was almost fully covered in blood. The sight made me nauseous. I should’ve listened to Yeosang, he was probably trying to avoid this from happening, but I couldn’t help how my body reacted when it thought it was in danger.

“I’m going to clean your back now, may I?” I nodded and felt the press of the rag against my raw skin, hissing as even the warm water made it sting. My back was burning as Yeosang carefully washed it clean, having to scrub gently in some places, but I could take it. My body has been through so much worse. He was doing this to help me too, I would never complain.

“I know it hurts, I’m sorry, but I have to thoroughly clean it otherwise it will get infected and then I can’t help you anymore, Miss.” Yeosang explained and I nodded in understatement, realizing I have never told him my name. That’s why he kept calling me Miss. I knew his, meanwhile he didn’t know mine, yet he never asked nor demanded for it.

“I’m going to pour some oil like serum on your back now, it won’t sting like the minty one.” I heard him open the vial, it made a quiet sound when it was popped open, “It has aloe vera in it, so it’s supposed to calm the burning feeling and it’s also an amazing antioxidant for open wounds. Your wounds aren’t deep enough to be stitched up, that’s why we have to take close care of them, Miss.”

“Alright, thank you for telling me.” I voiced my gratitude for the first time and Yeosang hummed lowly, a sound which tinged my cheeks red. His voice could get incredibly deep, it was quite unexpected.

“May I proceed then?” Yeosang inquired quietly and I nodded, biting my lower lip as he poured the serum over my wounds, fingers carefully massaging it into the skin. It slightly stung, but I was surprised at the warm feeling which engulfed my whole back as Yeosang kept rubbing it deeper into the wounds. It felt so good, the pain finally subsided for even a little bit and I could feel my body relaxing, muscles finally crying out in relief as I let out a shaky breath. My head hung low and more tears started falling down my cheeks. It felt so warm and relieving, I wanted to thank Yeosang a million times, but instead, I asked the question which was burned to the forefront of my mind.

“Why do you keep asking for consent when you want to touch me?” Yeosang’s fingers froze mid massage and I tensed slightly, wondering if I pissed him off this time, if he would break and show his true intentions. But nothing happened, he resumed his ministrations and then sighed long and deeply.

“Because I keep touching you.” His words held a finality to them, they were hard but not harsh, “Because if you told me to stop, I would. Because I would never touch you inappropriately or against your will. I’m a doctor and my duty is to heal you, Miss, not damage you more. And even still…I would never lay a finger on you…I just—I couldn’t hurt you—or anyone. No human being is capable of doing such horrible things like what was done to you, I—I’m sorry. I promise to heal you and then let you go, Miss, once we hit land you’ll be free.”

His words sounded too good to be true. As if I was in a dream. As if he was a prince talking to his princess. And he sounded so genuine. I couldn’t find anything but sincerity in his voice and that just made my lungs feel even more restricted, brought more tears into my eyes. People like him existed? They were real? Could he be not acting? As his fingers disappeared I knew he was done massaging the serum into my skin and Yeosang leaned down to grab the fresh gauze.

“I’ll wrap this around you and you’re good to go.” He said and I couldn’t help but start crying, trying to keep quiet, but I couldn’t when hiccups started leaving my mouth. Yeosang seemed alarmed, thinking he had hurt me, but I just muttered for him to continue and ignore me, too overwhelmed by my own feelings. He worked quickly, probably scared that he was the cause of my breakdown, and while he indeed was, it wasn’t from any ill-intention. It was because for the first time in my life I felt like I was being treated like a human being. Like I was being respected and given a choice.

“My—my name is—” I spoke up between sobs, wiping the tears off my cheeks only for new ones to roll down, “It’s—Y/N.”

Yeosang sucked in a harsh breath of air before humming, careful to not touch my skin as he wrapped the gauze around my torso. I allowed the shirt to fall to my lap, he couldn’t see me from behind, it was fine, “Glad to meet you, Y/N.”

His voice was sweet as he said my name and I could hear the smile in it, making me sniff even more and cry harder, “You too, Yeosang.”

When he was done with the gauze, he tied it tightly against my back, patting his hands down to make sure it fit correctly against my small form. I felt him moving behind me and his warmth and flower like scent disappeared as he got off the bed, but didn’t move. He was waiting for me to dress myself. I bit my lower lip and tried to stop crying, but it was hard, as I wore his shirt and did the buttons with a shaky hand.

“I’m from the Sun Set Kingdom.” I muttered as I did the last button, Yeosang moved to place the items he used before back to their place. He made a surprised sound and then looked at me with a smile, ignoring how pathetic I looked right now, tears still flowing down my cheeks.

“Me too!” He seemed happy as he closed his chests filled with medicine, “We’re both far away from home, then.”

I nodded and watched as Yeosang gathered the dirty rugs and bowl of water, placed them back on the tray and stood up straight, walking to the door. He unlocked it and before he opened it, he peeked back at me over his shoulder, “Don’t forget about the ointment for your thighs.”

“I won’t.” I nodded as he slipped out the door, locking it behind him before he walked away. I face planted into the pillow and allowed the sobs to wreck my body, for my heart to ache just like the rest of my body.

My body felt exhausted for the rest of the day after Yeosang placed on the new bandages, my mind wrapped up with thoughts and heart clenching with unwanted feelings. I didn’t know how to feel anymore. I knew I couldn’t trust Yeosang so quickly, but he sounded genuine. His eyes reflected nothing but honesty and purity. Would he treat me so gently if he was just acting? Would he get mad or tense even at the little implications of why I was in such state? Would he respect me so much if he truly was just acting? I couldn’t tell what was real or not anymore. I have never been shown so much care and respect before, my body and mind yearned for it. It screamed out for Yeosang’s tenderness and warmth. He radiated calmness and safety. I have barely known him for three days, yet I wanted nothing more but ask him to protect me from the horrors of the world. Would he do that? Could he do that? Everything hurt as I tossed around sleepless, eyebrows furrowed and lips parted in constant huffs as my mind kept racing with questions. Dinner was hours ago; the medicine has made its effect and the pain felt dull. The rocking of the ship wasn’t as bothersome as up until now, it didn’t make me feel nauseous anymore. Perhaps I was getting used to it. Or perhaps the waters have calmed down, the storm passing by us. I yearned for fresh air, but I was scared of what the men on this ship would do to me. Or was everyone like Yeosang? My ears perked up when I heard shuffling just outside the door, body tensing when I heard a faint knock. It was quiet, barely there, and I gripped the blanket and pulled it up to my nose, curling up in a ball despite Yeosang’s warnings not to do so. I could only hope the wounds wouldn’t bleed. My heart started thumping wildly as the key was inserted into the keyhole, slowly, carefully turning without making any sound. Yeosang never bothered me after dinner. Did someone else take the key? Did he give it to someone else? Of course, I have started trusting him too fast and now I was about to get treated like on the mainland. My breath stuttered and I tried to make myself even smaller as the door cracked open just a little, dim light flooding inside the room. I squeezed my eyes shut tightly and stopped breathing altogether. If I made no sound, perhaps they would think I wasn’t here.

“Y/N,” The deep voice was familiar, “It’s Yeosang.”

I released a deep breath and opened my eyes, peeking at him as he swiftly entered the room and quickly locked the door. He stood frozen in front of it as we stared at each other, both of our eyes wide, “You shouldn’t curl up like that…”

He whispered, eyebrows furrowed, breaking the tense atmosphere. I nodded and straightened my body, laying on my side, heart still beating fast. Yeosang scratched the back of his head and took a step further inside the room, seeming very hesitant and nervous. It was rubbing off on me as I waited tensely for him to say anything else.

“I’m sorry, I know this is unexpected, but—” Yeosang cleared his throat before continuing in a whisper, “Nobody besides myself and the two other women know about your presence on the ship. If I keep sleeping in Jongho’s room they will come and inspect mine, thinking something was wrong. The other pirates started getting suspicious already, I can’t—I have to sleep in here, Y/N. It’s my room, you know.”

My brain seemed to be hung up on one thing only, “Pi—pirates?”

I’ve only heard about them when the other ladies at the brothel would whisper about them, dreading their time with them. They sounded ruthless and aggressive, had little care for anyone else besides themselves. I exhaled shakily as Yeosang approached the bed, but stood at the end of it.

“Yes, we’re Ateez.” Yeosang answered and watched me expectantly, as if I was supposed to know what that meant. But I have never heard of that name before, so I just raised my eyebrows, lowering the blanket from my nose. There was no need to hide myself anymore.

“Do you not know Ateez?” Yeosang asked when I stared wordlessly and I quickly shook my head no, “Oh, well then, uhm, yeah. We’re like…well-known for the things we do, you know? On the sea, we’re—quite famous? I mean, people tend to stay away from us because we’ve created a reputation for ourselves and our Captain is quite fearless. He’s a well-respected man amongst pirates.”

I nodded and chewed on my bottom lip, taking in his words, “Are you dangerous? Do you hurt people?”

My voice sounded too small, but I couldn’t help the shudder which followed. I knew Yeosang saw it as he rubbed his chin, trying to smile, “We never hurt innocent people—we don’t hurt women.”

I averted my eyes when his stare felt too much, eyes boring into mine. I understood what he was saying. He wouldn’t hurt me, but I couldn’t be so sure of that just yet. I nodded without looking at him and he walked further inside his room, headed towards the wardrobe.

“I will sleep on the floor, don’t worry—”

“I can’t let you do that, it’s your own room.” I quickly interjected, sitting up quickly, wincing at the burn of my muscles. I should be more careful; my wounds weren’t even half healed.

“I’d rather you feel comfortable, Y/N, sleeping on the floor is nothing I can’t handle.” Yeosang’s lips pulled into a reassuring smile and I gulped, looking down at the bed. His eyes were soft. And once again, he was putting me before himself. Wanting me to feel comfortable. He was caring about how I felt, instead of how he would feel.

“Please,” I said quietly, looking up into his eyes, “I would feel horrible if you slept on the floor. It’s—it’s the least I can do to show gratitude for everything you’ve done for me.”

“I haven’t even done anything, Y/N, I’m just healing you.” Yeosang’s eyebrows furrowed and he shook his head, “It’s my duty as a doctor.”

“I know,” I pressed, biting my lower lip, “But I—please, just let me do this. I have no money to pay you.”

“I don’t need money.” Yeosang muttered, eyes lit up with a fire I couldn’t recognize, “I just want to see you healthy and walking away from here.”

I said nothing as my heart clenched and I licked my lips, staring into Yeosang’s eyes pleadingly. I really had nothing with what I could pay him back, this was the least I could do. It was his room after all. I didn’t want to deny comfort from him, he wouldn’t deserve it. In this moment, I decided to blindly trust him. Yeosang seemed to be fighting with himself, eyebrows furrowed as he ran his fingers through his hair, which was framing his face without the bobby pins. He glanced back at me and then suddenly sighed, shaking his head, “Are you sure?”

“Yes.” My voice sounded firm for the first time as I nodded and Yeosang nodded back, slowly approaching the bed. I scooted closer to the wall and laid on my back, making space for him. The bed wasn’t big, but I was small and so Yeosang had enough space. I closed my eyes as I felt the bed dip and then the blanket was slightly lifted as Yeosang sat on the edge of the bed. He shuffled around for a bit and then his body was laying next to mine, mirroring my stance, blanket pulled over his body too. I tensed without meaning too, breath catching in my throat for a second, used to this, yet the feeling so unfamiliar. His warmth seemed to quickly envelope mine and I found myself breathing in his familiar flower scent. Yeosang didn’t seem to be tense, he was staring up at the wooden ceiling, jaw clenching and unclenching. I turned my head and allowed myself to stare at his profile in the darkness, hoping he wouldn’t notice. Despite the bed being small and Yeosang a buffer man, his body never touched mine. Not even his hands as they were intertwined and placed on his stomach. He seemed to be deep in thought and my eyes traced the outline of his sharp nose, eyes having long adjusted to the dark. His lips were slightly parted and as he blinked, he suddenly turned his head and looked at me. I jumped and quickly turned my head away, towards the wall, embarrassed. Yeosang made no sound and didn’t move as he continued looking at me. My cheeks were burning and I cleared my throat, fingers flexing and unflexing as I turned my head to stare at the ceiling. Yeosang didn’t look away and I took a shaky breath, so many feelings stirring inside my heart. Any other men would’ve been on top of me by now. They wouldn’t even bothered asking before they got in the same bed with me. Yeosang didn’t even ask, he offered to sleep on the cold, hard floor. My eyebrows furrowed at the thought and I couldn’t help the words which bubbled out.

“I was kidnapped by a man at a young age and was soon sold off to a family.” My voice sounded too loud in the quiet room, but it was barely above a whisper, “The family wasn’t too bad, until the father started becoming handsy. I ran away, and the man who kidnapped me found me somehow and took me with himself once again. But this time he sold me off to an old man, who was—not a good person. I lived with him for two years, until he died. Until I—I—killed him.”

My hands started shaking as all the repressed memories were resurfacing. Yeosang sucked in a sharp breath next to me, but I continued, a newfound braveness seeping through my veins, “His son found me and well—I survived. Barely, but I did. I was forced to be his maid for too long, and when he got bored he made me work at an Inn. I don’t know how it happened, fate was probably laughing in my face, but the man who kidnapped me showed up again at the Inn—years after, he recognized me. I felt so helpless as he took me with himself and sold me off again. To a brothel this time, and I’ve been working there up until three days ago. My last client—he wanted me to go to his house. I’ve always been afraid of him; he’s always been so scary and just—not sane. I didn’t do anything, but he just—started to take his anger out on me. Promised I’d never see the daylight ever again. I don’t know how I did it, but I managed to fight him off and run away, but he found me at the cliff. He didn’t even think twice before pushing me down. I think he once said I resembled his late wife whom he hated, it was a long time ago, I don’t quite remember. I was sure I was going to die in the sea that night, you know? And when I felt someone pulling me to the surface—I wanted nothing more than for the sea to swallow me up, to save me from humans. But I don’t know anymore how to feel. What to think. You’re—not like them. You’re gentle and you respect me. Want to heal me, help me. I want to trust you, Yeosang, but the voices in my head keep whispering that you’re just acting to earn my trust, I can’t help it.”

I took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, biting my lower lip as I didn’t dare move. Yeosang seemed stiff next to me, I couldn’t hear him breathing anymore. I was afraid to look at him, so I didn’t, I just stared up at the ceiling and blinked rapidly, the tears in my eyes sudden. I didn’t want to cry, but my chest felt heavier the longer the silence stretched between us. And then, finally, Yeosang sighed. Deep and long. I heard the movement before I felt a warm hand grabbing mine underneath the blanket. My body felt too exhausted to react, I couldn’t help but cling onto Yeosang’s warm hand, fingers intertwining with his. Nobody has held me like that before. So firmly yet tenderly.

“We all make mistakes, you had to kill that man because he gave you no other choice.” His words surprised me and a few tears were quick to roll down my cheeks. I had always felt so horrible about what I had done. I wasn’t a murderer, yet I took a life. I wasn’t a God, yet I was playing God. I wished for forgiveness every day after that, but I never got an answer. I have sinned so severely that not even the Gods wanted to give me another chance. I was doomed a long time ago, yet I could never truly accept my fate. Yeosang’s words carried weight, almost as if he understood the feeling, “Sometimes we’re pushed to do things we never knew we were capable of doing. My mother placed me on this ship and paid a lot of money for the Captain to take me in after I’ve done something horrible—after I—I killed my father.”

My heart stuttered for a second and I felt my grip tighten around Yeosang’s fingers, lips parting in surprise.

“If he wasn’t abusive I would’ve never hurt him, but he almost killed my mother. He beat me up too and I just—snapped. It was my mother’s way of saving me by sending me here. I was lucky enough to find a family here within the nine pirates.” I quickly wiped my tears with my free hand and turned my head, to look at Yeosang. He turned his head too, eyes glistening with unshed tears. My breath caught in my throat for a moment, he looked so soft. So warm and gentle, “When you’re all healed up and healthy, Y/N, you are free to go. To get off this ship on a land where nobody knows you, where you can start again. New. Build a life for yourself. Somewhere you’ll be safe.”

“Thank you.” I whispered and Yeosang nodded, determination coating his eyes as he squeezed my hand, before turning his head away and slowly retracting his hand from mine.

“You shouldn’t sleep on your back, Y/N.” He muttered as he turned onto his right side, back facing me. I couldn’t help but smile as I turned onto my left side, facing the wooden wall. Despite being underneath the same blanket, Yeosang’s presence didn’t feel threatening.

“I know.” I whispered back before closing my eyes and allowing the gentle rocking of the ship to lull me into a deep sleep.

Things seemed to change after Yeosang and I started sleeping in the same bed. I wasn’t so tense around him anymore and my body stopped reacting to him as if he brought danger with himself. Yeosang always remained respectful and careful. He never stepped out of line and never touched me unless it was necessary, and even still, he always asked for consent. A week has passed since he found me and saved me and my wounds were healing just fine. My feet felt as good as new, nothing but little scars decorating them. The ointment was like magic and the bruises have been gone from my thighs in just a few days. However, my back was still in the healing process, three wounds still not having fully healed, but I was doing better. The pain had turned into discomfort and the wound would only burn when the aloe vera serum was massaged into it. My muscles have finally eased up and I could move my body freely. I could barely recognize my body, and my mind as well. I was still alert when I heard movement outside the door, but I didn’t flinch nor tense anymore when Yeosang would come close. I stopped questioning his genuineness and allowed my heart to trust him. He would constantly reassure me that he had no malicious intentions and I believed him. I hoped the safe haven he had created would never break, that he truly was the man who he seemed to be. I knew I wouldn’t survive it if he was lying, but I have also decided that if Yeosang wasn’t the man he preached himself to be, then I would just end it here on the ship. At least the sea would take me away quickly, would allow me to go peacefully, to float away into nothingness. Yeosang had told me that nobody on the ship except for Taeri and Ara knew about my existence, so that’s why I had to stay in his room. After I was allowed to walk it wasn’t even too depressing, I could lean against the wall and stare out the window all day long, taking in the beauty of the sea, watching as the waves crashed against the ship, as the sun shone high up in the sky. Despite yearning to feel the warmth of the sun, Yeosang’s room brought comfort and safety and made me never want to leave the ship. Despite usually being a quiet person, Yeosang brought out a side of me I didn’t even know I had, and we were often giggling about peculiar stories we shared with each other during lunch and dinner, sharing the lives we had before we became the way we are.

When Yeosang found out I couldn’t read he made it his personal mission to teach me and the next morning he came to our room with two different books, one thin and the other very thick. They were tale books from the North, talking about folklore and creatures which only existed in fairytales. They were interesting and my curiosity fueled the want to know more, to learn more. Reading proved to be difficult, I wasn’t too good with memorizing things, but Yeosang was patient and calm. He never raised his voice; he never made fun of me or made me feel stupid if he had to help me out with a certain letter. He just explained calmy, patted my shoulder reassuringly, and then allowed me to read. I stuttered quiet often and after whispering how cute I was, he walked off with a blush on his cheeks, excusing himself as he had a lot of work to do, but encouraged me to read the chapter on my own and narrate it to him in the evening. It was the same evening my curiosity got the best of me and as Yeosang and I were sat on the bed, knees touching as our bodies huddled together, book between our laps, I blurted out the question I tried to keep to myself.

“What’s that?” I wondered loudly as I poked his temple carefully, Yeosang’s eyes widening as he turned his head to look at me.

“What is what?” He asked confused and as his eyebrows furrowed, I couldn’t help but think how cute he looked.

“The red mark on your temple and cheekbone.” I explained and cleared my throat, realizing I might’ve been rude for asking such a thing. Perhaps it was something he was uncomfortable with, I didn’t know how he got it after all, “I’m sorry if that was rude—”

“It wasn’t.” Yeosang quickly shook his head with a smile, “The redness is called a birthmark. I was born with it.”

My eyes widened and my lips formed an o shape, never having heard of such a thing before. It was my first time seeing it too on anyone. Yeosang watch my reaction and chuckled to himself with a grin before he turned his head, looking down at the book again. He took it in his hands and hummed, fingers brushing against the last sentence I have read, “Do you believe in it?”

My mind was still stuck on the new information as my eyes bore into the side of Yeosang’s face, eyes glued to the red birthmark. It was special, just like Yeosang. When Yeosang suddenly faced me again, I jumped, realizing he had asked me something. I quickly looked down at the book and re-read the last sentence I have read minutes ago and hummed. The tale was talking about a red string which was similar to fate, but talked about binding two people together. Two people who were supposed to find each other in every lifetime they shared. A bond which could never be broken,

“I’ve never really believed in anything like folklore and tales, but—perhaps if there are Gods then this is real too.” I voiced my thoughts freely, having realized that Yeosang was always curious of what I was thinking, quite often asking for my opinion. Nobody has been interested to hear what I had to say, nor would listen as intently as Yeosang.

“I believe in it.” Yeosang muttered quietly, his deep voice making goosebumps erupt on my skin, “I always thought we had a purpose in life and that the people we come across aren’t coincidental.”

His words carried a nuance I couldn’t quite understand, but couldn’t help but agree with. If Yeosang never came into my life I would be long gone, dead, forgotten.

“You’re the best part of my life, Yeosang.” I found the confession tumbling through my lips, eyes slightly widening when I realized I had said aloud what I was thinking. Yeosang’s lips pulled into a wide smile as we made eye contact and he nodded his head, looking humble and grateful.

“I hope you find more people like me one day, then.”

“I don’t think I will.”

The silence was heavy as we stared into each other’s eyes, mesmerized by Yeosang’s stare. It was soft and warm, filled with gratitude and happiness. I didn’t know what made me do it, but my body yearned for the familiarity of his warmth and I reached out hesitantly, slowly reaching for his hand. Yeosang glanced down when I gently poked my fingers against his hand and a shy smile stretched onto his lips as he opened his palm, facing up. I pressed mine down against his and our fingers intertwined as my face suddenly flushed red, becoming embarrassed. Perhaps it was a normal reaction for your body to yearn for something as simple as holding a hand, but the feeling was foreign and I couldn’t decide whether it was normal or not for Yeosang. His smile got even wider and he hung his head low, the flush on his cheeks matching the redness of his birthmark.

“I have never asked, I just realized this,” He spoke up after he seemed to collect his thoughts, still hiding his face from me, “But did you have anything you enjoyed doing before—before I found you?”

When I was still living in the brothel. And even before that. But Yeosang didn’t have to say that for me to understand, “I love to draw, actually. The brothel paid enough that I could afford some parchment and cheap pencils. It used to help me take my mind off things.”

Yeosang’s fingers twitched slightly and his thumb started rubbing my knuckle, making my heart almost jump through my chest. What was this feeling? Was it normal? Was I about to die?

“I’ll see what I can do about that.” Was all Yeosang said before he picked up the book and continued reading the story about the red string, his thumb stroking my knuckle in an even rhythm, my heartbeat frantic until it finally calmed down to an even beat, the only evidence of feeling flustered the flush on my cheeks.

And this is how I found myself a day later sitting at Yeosang’s desk with a fresh piece of parchment and five pencils. He even had something I could erase the lines with, something I have never even heard of before. I was shocked as he walked in with all the items and made place for them on his packed desk, placing two chests down onto the floor, next to his desk. He led me to the chair and asked me to sit, undoing the bindings around the surprise he had for me. I gasped and thanked him a million times as I opened the parchment and grabbed a pencil, feeling it between my fingers before I started drawing fine lines. Yeosang watched for a little before he excused himself, saying he was needed on deck by his Captain and that he would stop by with lunch. I was taken by the new activity I enjoyed dearly and only hummed at Yeosang as he left the room, leaving it unlocked. He stopped locking the door after I told him I trusted him and felt comfortable with an unlocked door, having realized that nobody other than Yeosang ever came to his room. He seemed reluctant at first, but obliged after a while, telling me that if this is what my wish was, he would respect it. But perhaps I had been too naïve and trusting, because the safe haven Yeosang and I have created in his room, came crashing down as I heard a manly voice echoing down the hallway.

“Kang Yeosang!” The man shouted and I tensed, barely able to react as the door to our shared room was thrown open. I froze for a second and all I could hear was my own breathing as my body tensed, pencil clutched tightly in my hand. The other man said nothing as he took a few steps inside the room. He seemed to forget to close the door, it brought little consolidation to my racing heart.

“Oh,” The voice sounded taunting, “You’re not Yeosang, are you?”

I pushed the chair back and stood up; hands turned into fists as my body lightly shook. This stranger could be just like Yeosang. I shouldn’t be so quick to judge, but I couldn’t help myself. Perhaps the pencil clutched in my hand could be used as a weapon if the man turned out to be another monster from the mainland. I swiftly turned around, trying to ease a smile onto my face and ready to speak up, but I paused. I froze as I stared at the man standing a few steps into the room, one eyebrow raised. His sharp eyes were quick to run over my body and I couldn’t help the instant reaction of my body as it tried to make itself small, shielding my face with my hair as I lowered my head. My body was visibly trembling as my brain quickly placed a name to the face of the man and all the history between the two of us. I suddenly couldn’t breathe as he took more steps further inside the room, feeling like the wooden structure of the room was closing in on me, ready to swallow me up whole.

“Don’t you have a mouth you can use?” The tone of the man was sharp and words harsh as I felt his intimidating glare bore into my head. I bit my lower lip, trying to find courage and speak up. But nothing came out as my lips opened, breathing through my mouth loudly. I was terrified. Perhaps if he didn’t see my face he wouldn’t recognize me.

“I’m looking for my little doctor friend, Yeosang, where is he, don’t you know little mouse?” I cringed at the nickname and closed my eyes harshly when his boots came into view, body freezing at the proximity between the two of us. I stopped breathing as I heard shuffling and suddenly, a harsh hand gripped my chin and raised my head up. I gasped loudly and started hyperventilating as the man shook my head by the grip he had on my chin.

“Open your eyes, little mouse.” My lips trembled as I opened them, but I looked anywhere but at the man’s face. I couldn’t. My body was full on trembling, mind screaming at me to run away. To get away. My grip tightened impossibly more on the pencil, mind racing with thoughts. Could I stab him in the neck if he tried to do anything to me? The atmosphere was tense as neither I nor the man spoke, up until his grip started tightening, making me wince in pain, “Little mouse—or shall I call you Y/N?”

My eyes widened as they snapped back onto the man’s face, terror written all over my face. I could see the same smirk in each one of my nightmares as the man’s lips were stretched into a sneer, looking incredulous but livid at the same time, “Aren’t you a bit far from your little brothel, Y/N? Walked into my little cage willingly, little mouse?”

I shook my head no as tears fell down my cheeks, trying to breathe properly, but I couldn’t anymore, “I—I didn’t know—please, I’m sorry. I—I will go back, just don’t hurt me again—please, San.”

“Weren’t you paid enough at the brothel, is that why you’re here?” San quirked an eyebrow and I quickly shook my head, but he didn’t let me speak, “Or did you come willingly to me, Y/N? Have you finally decided to work for me and only me?”

“No—I—” San chuckled and yanked me forward, faces mere inches away, making me choke on my terribly stuttered words.

“Wrong choice, little mouse.” I let out a sob as San’s wide smile looked sinister, and I knew it only promised more anguish to come, “I know just the perfect client for you. And he’ll pay me lots of money since you’re still good to be used—”

“Let her go!” A deep voice cut off San’s words and my eyes were instantly drawn to Yeosang. He stood in the doorway, chest rising and falling quickly as if he had been running, hair disheveled, and for the first time Yeosang looked scary as his lips were pulled into a scowl and his eyes held sharpness as he glared at the back of San’s head, “Let her go, San, I’m not going to ask again.”

San’s eyebrows were pulled up and he looked at me with amusement written all over his face as he tilted his head slightly at me, a question swimming in his eyes. I shook my head barely, but I knew San caught it as he glanced back at Yeosang with the same amused expression. It made Yeosang livid as he stormed inside the room and grabbed San’s bicep hard and yanked him away, San’s firm grip from my chin disappearing. I gasped as I fell back into the desk, holding tightly against it as my heart raced and I struggled to breathe.

“What the fuck do you want?” I have never heard Yeosang swear. The sweet Yeosang I knew was gone and was replaced by someone I couldn’t recognize. He looked dangerous in his all-black attire, veins on his arms bulging visible as he wore another tank top. His hair fell into his eyes and hid his glare, making him look even more menacing.

“I came to find you, mate, because thanks to Taeri, Ara has managed to actually injure me.” San hissed out, jaw clenched as he gripped the top of Yeosang’s tank top, “And what do I find instead of you? A whore sitting at your desk and drawing.”

It happened barely in a few seconds and I gasped loudly as Yeosang’s punch threw San off balance, head whipping to the side, and if Yeosang wasn’t still holding him, San would’ve stumbled to the floor. My hands flew to my mouth as I watched San raise his head back up slowly, getting all up in Yeosang’s face, “What the fuck are you doing?”

“Talk like that ever again about Y/N and I will kill you with my own hands—” The cackle San let out was shrill and it made Yeosang’s head thump as he sucked in a harsh breath, “Touch her again, and it will be Hongjoong who kills you, not me, San.”

“Hongjoong doesn’t give a shit about a whore, Yeosang—”

“Shut the fuck up!” Yeosang screamed, making me flinch, “I thought you learned your lesson with Taeri and Yunho, but it seems like you haven’t.”

“I own that whore!” San screamed back, pointing his finger in my direction, making me sob as Yeosang looked at me, he was breathing harder and harder, “She’s mine, Yeosang, and when we hit land I’m going to sell her off like the good little whore she is—”

“Get the fuck out right now, San.” Yeosang suddenly sounded too calm, face void of any emotion. It even threw San off guard as he stared at him, stumbling forward as Yeosang released him while hauling him forward. San didn’t cast a second glance our way as walked out the room as if nothing had happened. When he was gone, Yeosang finally looked at me, and I couldn’t help but break down in front of him, fall to the floor as I started sobbing loudly, clutching the pencil to my chest as if my life depended on it. Yeosang was frozen until he slowly approached me and crouched down in front of me, his own eyes filled with tears. I was heaving and my body was shaking badly, but his flowery scent was able to clear my mind, to silence the fear inside my brain as I looked up at him. He looked just as broken as I felt. It made me hate myself. Everything was so perfect. And now it was all ruined by San.

“I’m sorry, I should’ve—”

“Stay quiet, Y/N.” Yeosang’s voice was hard and it made me flinch, “What are you apologizing for? That you’re on the same ship as your tormentor? The one who continuously sold you off? That you’re here because of me? Because I am in the same crew as San? Because I’m a horrible person?!”

I shook my head quickly and reached out to hold Yeosang’s face, action foreign, “You’re not a horrible person, Yeosang. You’re anything but that, please—you couldn’t have known that San—You saved me, Yeosang. I’m alive because of you.”

Yeosang’s lower lip trembled as he lowered his face and placed his warm hand over mine, letting out a shuddering breath, “We’ll get to land in a week. Then you’ll be free. And San will never again find you or touch you again, I swear.”

I nodded my head furiously, sniffing as Yeosang suddenly pulled away and stood, storming out the room. I was left alone, trembling and gasping for air as repressed memories of San came back like a violent blow.

Another week passed by like nothing, the days seemed to blur together here on the ship. After what happened with San, Yeosang barely left my side and would lock the door even if he was inside in the room with me. He seemed to be always on high alert and tense if someone walked by his room. It took me a few days until I let Yeosang in again, having seen San and realizing we were on the same ship has messed up my mind. I couldn’t feel as safe as before, but with Yeosang by my side, I knew nothing would happen to me. He stopped San the last time. I knew he’d do it again. Yesterday night when Yeosang came to bed he had told me that we have finally reached land and that while the others would be out tomorrow he’d like to take me to the market himself. The idea sounded exciting and I barely got a wink of sleep all night, tossing and turning freely as my back was all healed up now, scars the only reminder of what was once done to me. The clothes Yeosang brought for me to wear in the morning were a bit foreign and I didn’t know how to feel about them, but I thanked him and wore them nonetheless, almost daring to think that I looked like a real pirate in them. The leather pants I wore were slightly longer than my legs but I managed to tuck them into the worn-out boots Yeosang found for me, they were my size thankfully. The black shirt I wore was silky against my skin and I gaped at it when I pulled it on, feeling the fabric with my fingers in awe. The corset I had a little difficulty with wearing it, foreign and uncomfortable, but I didn’t want to seem ungrateful to Yeosang so I quickly put it on and laced it up myself, leaving it looser since it felt like a reminder of the wounds littered around my torso, a reminder of the suffocating pain they have once caused. When I was done dressing I knocked on the door and Yeosang opened it, a wide smile on his face. His eyes quickly ran over my outfit and he grinned happily, complementing me. I blushed furiously and looked away, having noticed that he also wore all black, our outfits matching in color. It seemed like black tank tops were his favorite as he wore one again, this time a black ribbon tied around his neck. He styled his hair in a way to cover his birthmark and a very obvious sword sat secured around his hips.

“Shall we go then?” Yeosang’s soft voice brought me back from my thoughts and I looked at him and nodded quickly, excited to get off the ship. Excited to see an unknown world. Excited to breathe in some fresh air finally. Yeosang led the way as I kept close behind him, fingers itching to hold onto the back of his tank top, but I stopped myself and just followed close, his bigger frame hiding me from anyone’s view. The corridor we walked down was narrow and long, doors leading to rooms on both sides until we reached wooden stairs leading upstairs. I sucked in a harsh breath when the sound of the waves crashing became louder and the salty air hit my nose, the light almost blinding as I padded after Yeosang. The moment we got on deck I paused, looking around with big eyes, taking in the place I’ve been living in for the past three weeks. The ship was huge. If you were to run around the deck you’d get tired. Yeosang started moving and I followed after him, turning around noticing some more stairs which lead to the quarterdeck, a round wheel sitting highly on top of it. I smiled as the sun shone down upon us, closing my eyes and throwing my head back as I stopped walking, basking in the warm sunlight. Seagulls screamed above us and I chuckled, thankful that I tied my hair in a low ponytail as the wind was strong up here. I felt like I was alive once again as I realized how much I have missed fresh air. It was nice to be out of Yeosang’s room. As I opened my eyes Yeosang was watching me silently, having stopped as well to wait for me. I grinned at him and ran up to him, allowing him to lead the way. We were the only people on deck, I found that weird since this ship was so huge, but I figured Yeosang might’ve arranged it to be this way.

After getting down and in the boat, Yeosang paddled towards the shore and I leaned over and dipped my hand in the sea, yelping at how cold it was. It made Yeosang chuckle before he focused on paddling and once we got to the shore he tied the boat securely and then helped me out of it. The water felt cold against my boots and it made me run quickly towards the sand, away from the water. Yeosang shook his head at me and then caught up, watching me as I twirled around with a smile on my face. Before either one of us could say anything, Yeosang led the way again as I stuck close to him, walking further and further away from the beach until we reached cobblestone covered streets. Little cottages started showing up too and I took in the beauty and simplicity of them, different from the houses I was used to seeing in the nasty city I was forced to live in while working at the brothel. Everyone was dressed in bright colors here and despite being strangers, people greeted us with a smile on their faces. There were a few people who recognized Yeosang, but we never stopped to talk with anyone. Everyone seemed too busy with whatever they had going on. As we neared the heart of the city, the streets became crowded as people roamed around, not quite paying attention to us anymore. It was a little stressful as I had to pay extra attention to not lose sight of Yeosang, but he slowed down his steps and paid attention for me to be always by his side. I almost got lost at one point so I gripped the back of Yeosang’s tank top and he sent a smile my way before walking with purpose, headed towards a boutique.

“What are we doing here?” I asked curiously as he pushed the door open for me, then followed me inside. The place was nicely decorated and many pretty dresses were placed on display. An older lady greeted us with a big smile, eyes fixated onto Yeosang as if she knew him.

“We’re here to buy you some new clothes,” Yeosang explained before he turned his attention onto the shopkeeper, “Hello, Mrs. Yang.”

“Long time no see, my boy, how have you been?” The lady asked with a fond smile and Yeosang shrugged nonchalantly.

“Just the usual, busier than before.” The lady hummed and then turned her attention onto me, eyes twinkling.

“What a beautiful girl, finally someone has charmed Yeosang.” I blushed at the lady’s words once I realized what she was implying, but before she could say more, Yeosang cleared his throat.

“Do you have dresses in her size?” He asked with a smile.

“Of course, follow me, my dear.” She extended her hand and I hesitantly placed mine in hers, glancing back at Yeosang to see if he was still here. But he just gave me a reassuring nod and followed after us, the lady showing a multitude of dresses, making it hard to choose. At last, I settled on a lavender breezy dress, perfect for a warm day. A white floral dress and a soft pink silk like dress. However, as she stated the prices of the three dresses I realized I had no money, yet Yeosang was quick to open his pouch and offer the lady the pennies she asked for. I looked at him surprised as the lady quickly packed the dresses into a big wrapping paper, biding it together by a rope. Yeosang took the package from her and carried it for me, ushering me outside the boutique as the lady opened her mouth to say something. Once we were out he shook his head.

“She’s a very nosy person, I don’t like discussing my affairs with her.” Yeosang explained and I nodded, pointing towards a little shop I had just noticed.

“Is that a bakery?” I asked in awe and Yeosang hummed, motioning for me to lead the way. I bounced towards the bakery in excitement, having not been to one in ages. The food was extremely good on the ship, but I missed the taste of pastry. It smelled heavenly as Yeosang and I walked through the opened door, another lady greeted us with a friendly smile. She stood behind a long desk, pastries displayed on it.

“Welcome, would you like some?” She motioned towards the yummy looking food and I nodded eagerly, eyes running over the pastries.

“Do you have anything vanilla flavored?” I asked and the lady nodded, pointing at a heart shaped pastry. I gave her a smile and she motioned for me to take it, which I did, and quickly turned to face Yeosang.

“I love anything vanilla flavored!” I beamed up at him and he chuckled, looking at the lady.

“May I have then one too?” The lady nodded her head and Yeosang quickly took one too, dropping four pennies on the table for the lady. She wished us a good day and we exited the shop, standing a little to the side as I took a big bite of the pastry. The rich taste of vanilla exploded in my mouth and I hummed contently, closing my eyes as I savored the delicacy. I haven’t had something this good in ages.

“You like it?” Yeosang asked as I opened my eyes and nodded at him eagerly, happy to be eating the pastry. He took his first bite and his eyebrows raised as he looked down at his own delicacy, finishing it in mere seconds. I started laughing loudly as Yeosang’s cheeks were stuffed with the vanilla pastry, cheeks hurting from how widely I was smiling once I have calmed down. Yeosang’s cheeks flushed and he rubbed the back of his head as he chewed the food with difficulty, eyes widening when he realized it might’ve been a mistake eating it all at once.

“Have you never eaten something like this?” I asked as I took some more bites of my own pastry and Yeosang shook his head no as he wasn’t able to speak just yet. I chuckled and quietly munched on the food, waiting for Yeosang to finally speak up.

“This was my first time,” He admitted with a chuckle as he had successfully gulped down all the food he had in his mouth, “and it was amazing, thank you for recommending it. Now come, I have a surprise for you.”

“Really?” I asked wide eyed and he nodded, gently grabbing my free hand and interlacing our fingers as he started pulling me further down the market. My cheeks were burning as I lowered my eyes and stared at the cobblestones, making sure I wouldn’t trip, but also to hide my own blush. Yeosang’s steps were quick and I realized he was eager as he was grinning from ear to ear, quickly stopping when we reached our destination. I almost ran into him, but managed to stop last minute. I looked at the boutique we have stopped in front of and my eyes widened as I looked back at Yeosang in shock.

“After you, Y/N.” He didn’t have to repeat himself as I basically tumbled inside, scaring the poor man sitting in the corner on a chair. He jumped up to his feet and relaxed once he realized it were just two regular customers, but didn’t smile nor speak to us as I took in the place, mouth hanging open. It was a crafts boutique. It was littered with blank canvas and pencils and so many colors. This was a painters dream. I went and touched a canvas as I heard Yeosang approaching, stopping next to me.

“You can buy anything you want, don’t worry about the price.” I looked at Yeosang with big eyes and bowed my head slightly in gratitude before picking up the canvas and clutching it to my chest. It has always been my dream to own enough utensils to be able to make paintings. But I never thought one day that dream would become reality. I was overwhelmed by many feelings as I picked up a few colored pencils, you didn’t have a big variety to choose from, but it was more than I have ever owned. My hands weren’t big enough to hold onto so many items at once, but I refused to let Yeosang help as I showed the men what I have chosen to take back to the ship. He seemed to count in his head before he asked for ten pennies and Yeosang handed it to him without many words, nodding at him as we left the boutique. I realized I could store the pencils in the pockets of my pants and quickly stuffed them inside, hugging the blank canvas to my chest. Yeosang hid his smile as there was a bounce in my step as I followed after him, allowing him to take me wherever he wanted to. Surprisingly we stopped by a flower stand and Yeosang greeted the seller with a smile before he leaned down and picked up a freesia and brought it up to his nose, inhaling its fragrance. He handed the seller two pennies before turning towards me and handing me the flower. My eyes widened and I blushed as I quickly took it from him, thanking him shyly. Yeosang grinned as I smelled the flower, eyes widening at the familiarity of it. As our eyes connected, Yeosang had a fond look on his face.

“They are my favorite flowers.” He explained and I nodded, realizing that this whole time Yeosang smelled like freesias. A tiny voice in my head whispered that they had become my favorite flowers too, the fragrance bringing comfort and safety as it calmed my nerves and racing mind. They felt like home. Yeosang and I stared at each other for another moment before he cleared his throat and went to lead the way again, but had to pull me back, into himself, as a man raced down the street, crashing into people. Three more people chased after him and I realized they were the constable’s men. Yeosang’s face was suddenly lowered and his breath hit my neck as he hid his face, suddenly the smell of freesia stronger with Yeosang so close. For a moment I was confused, until I realized why Yeosang had done that. He was a pirate. And constables didn’t like them. He was trying to hide his identity. But when nobody seemed to notice him, he straightened up once again and mumbled an apology, asking me to follow him as he led us away from the busy street.

My day spent with Yeosang has been magical. We spent it wandering around the little city, which I learned was a village by the sea on one of the South Kingdom’s islands, close to the Irenic Sea. It was completely on the other side of where Yeosang had found me. It was a comforting thought that I was far away from where once I have lived through torture and hell. Yeosang and I bought some more pastries and then we sat down by a cliff, looking over the sea and talking about our day together. Yeosang seemed to be content, serene even, as he had laid down in the grass, staring up at the blue sky. I mirrored his actions and started seeing shapes in the clouds, pointing them out to him and giggling when he wouldn’t see what I could. We talked about anything that came into our minds and Yeosang shared stories about all the times he was clumsy when making his medicine, making me laugh when he retold failed experiments. All the worries I previously seemed to have disappeared the longer I was with Yeosang. I seemed to find nothing too worrying in his presence. He placed a blanket of safety over me and I couldn’t help but want to snuggle closer to him. He suddenly sat up and then grabbed something from his pouch, it was the book we were currently reading. I continued laying on the grass as Yeosang started reading, his deep voice warm and lively as he read a conversation out loud. I closed my eyes and allowed his voice to take me to a land I’ve never been to, finding myself smiling.

But when you are enjoying yourself, it always feels like time flies by. It was the first time I have experienced the saying. I truly wished for the day to be longer, but as the breeze calmed and the sun slowly started setting over the horizon, I knew it was time to head back. We were walking down a dirt covered path, at a crossroads towards the beach and some homey looking cottages, when Yeosang suddenly stopped as I went to walk towards the beach.

“I hope today was as beautiful as I planned it to be.” He said with a smile and I turned to look at Yeosang with a chuckle.

“Of course, it was, Yeosang. I couldn’t have asked for anything better!” I beamed up at him and he nodded happily, running his fingers through his hair.

“Good, I’m glad to hear, I also had an amazing time with you today, Y/N.” I looked away shyly.

“We should head back now.” I said quietly, avoiding Yeosang’s eyes, but his next words made me pause.

“I am heading back, you are not.” I looked at him alarmed, eyes wide as he grabbed his pouch and undid it from his belt, “There’s enough gold in here to last you for three months, Y/N. That’s enough time to find a nice house to live in and a job which pays well. You could even work at the bakery or perhaps sell flowers.”

I gulped as I looked at Yeosang, eyes falling on the pouch, “Are you saying…that I’m staying here? And you’re leaving with…Ateez?”

Yeosang nodded wordlessly and suddenly my mouth went dry as I reluctantly took the pouch when he nudged it towards me. I watched as he fidgeted with his fingers for a bit before he pulled a ring off his finger. I have noticed it a long time ago, but never gave it much attention. Yeosang stared at it longingly before handing it over to me, my palm closing around it tightly, “Keep that ring on you at all times. Wear it as a necklace so that everybody can see it. It will keep you safe, I promise.”

“A ring will keep me safe?” I mumbled as I opened my palm and looked at the ring closely. The letter A was craved inside it. Perhaps from Ateez? How could a ring keep me safe?

“It will, trust me, everyone knows about the meaning of this ring. So it will keep you away from unwanted people.” Yeosang explained further when he noticed my hesitancy.

“I don’t—I don’t want your ring, Yeosang.” I whispered as I looked at him pleadingly, “Don’t leave me behind. I—I can’t be on my own. You can keep me safe, not this ring—”

“No, trust me, it will!” Yeosang quickly exclaimed as his eyebrows furrowed, “I would never lie to you. This place is safe and pirates rarely come here. I suggested sailing here specifically to drop you off here. Y/N, please. I promise nobody will find you here. You can start your new life right here. People are welcoming and friendly. You will be safe. And you will find happiness.”

My eyebrows furrowed at Yeosang’s words and I quickly shook my head, walking up to him, feeling dread pool in my stomach. I wasn’t safe anywhere. San will always find me. Men will always be around me. They will use me. They will sell me. Yeosang was the only safe person. He was the only genuine man I have ever known.

“That’s not true, I don’t want to stay here, Yeosang.” I couldn’t even continue my argument because Yeosang sighed and started talking again.

“Just listen to me one last time, Y/N. You have to stay here—”

“No, because I—I feel like I’m about to die if you leave me alone here!” I exclaimed and my eyes widened at the confession, but my heart was racing and my mind was a mess again, “I’m scared of people if you’re not with me, Yeosang. I can’t trust anyone, no matter how hard I try. I just—my mind is full of these thoughts that are only silenced if I’m around you, Yeosang. Please don’t push me away. Don’t leave me here. I can’t—I can’t live without you. I really mean that. If you go, I might just—”

“Don’t finish that sentence.” Yeosang gasped out as a hand was placed on the side of my neck, holding me gently. I gulped and felt my eyes fill with tears as Yeosang looked at me alarmed, eyebrows furrowed as we gazed into each other’s eyes, “You won’t be safe on a pirate ship. You will be a wanted criminal by association. You will witness gory fights and heavily injured people often. You might become friends with someone who you might lose the next day. The life of a pirate isn’t easy, Y/N, it’s demanding. Both physically and mentally. There will be days when I won’t be able to look at you or even talk to you. I shut down sometimes, when I can’t save someone, I want to die with them. I have outbursts and sometimes struggle to remain calm. I’m not always so gentle and I can’t lose an argument, I—I can hurt you. And that’s the last thing I want to do. I could lose you and then I—”

“Don’t finish that sentence.” A tear rolled down my cheek, “I will stand by your side, no matter what, Yeosang. Always. I will wait for you patiently when you need time. I hate arguing so you won’t have to win that from me. I will try and be strong, I will learn how to fight, and how to help you with healing others. I won’t allow you to spiral into guilt and self-hatred. We’ll work through everything, together.”

Yeosang sucked in a deep breath, his grip tightening on my neck. I offered him an encouraging smile and he shook his head, almost disappointed at himself, “You really want to come with me? San will be always there.”

My jaw clenched at the mention of that terrible man’s name, but I shook my head, “I don’t care where San is as long as I’m by your side, Yeosang. You’re my home now. You make me feel safe and appreciated. You listen to me and care about me. You showed me respect when nobody else did, you—you treated me like a human being when nobody else has.”

Yeosang let out a shuddered breath, sniffing as he nodded slowly, eyes boring into mine. They were filled with warmth and determination. His eyes were twinkling with a newfound purpose and I felt a smile creep up onto my lips, “Let’s go home, Y/N.”

“Let’s go home, Yeosang.” I whispered with a big smile on my face and allowed myself to act without second guessing everything as I leaned up and pressed a kiss against Yeosang’s birthmark. Both of our faces were red when I pulled away and I couldn’t help but giggle shyly as I stepped back from Yeosang’s reach and raced down towards the beach, a newfound freedom lacing through every inch of my skin.

A new chapter of my life has just begun. I was Jung Y/N, a woman who’d start the journey of her life starting from…right now.