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y-rhywbeth2 · 2 months

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Lore: Baldur's Gate #1

Link: Disclaimer regarding D&D "canon" & Index [tldr: D&D lore is a giant conflicting mess. Larian's lore is also a conflicting mess. You learn to take what you want and leave the rest]

The City | Demographics | Administration & Government | ??? - WIP

Might as well start compiling lore on the namesake of the game...

Featuring the city aesthetic (the depiction of it in-game wasn't nearly grey, damp or claustrophobic enough) and a mostly complete overview of the city and its major areas: the Lower City, Upper City, Outer City, Undercellar and Undercity.

Cultural titbits: like why you can't have animals bigger than peacocks; that you shouldn't live here if you have claustrophobia; how the Patriars clearly have it out for people with hay fever; the constant mould problem; where to go to get a glowing tattoo, a fake tan and the magical equivalent of a plastic surgeon; and why, in fairness to the Banites, the city requires very little effort to turn into a nightmarish police state under the control of an evil deity.

And if your Dark Urge is a sewer gremlin then that's a life choice they're making, not a Bhaalist thing: the Undercity isn't in the sewers.

The city state of Baldur's Gate is one of Faerûn's more important ports, situated geographically between the massive trade centres of Athkatla and Waterdeep. It began its life as a fusion of the early fishing hamlet of Loklee (formed around 0 DR) and the pirate and smuggler hub that formed nearby. It was a popular port with a shipyard and visitor's wharves by 204 DR. The natural harbour the man-made harbour is built on is one of the only places in hundreds of miles that's safe for ships to dock at.

Due to the lack of nearby settlements to form competition, the trade hub attained city status and import early in its existence. It briefly fell under the early kingdom of Shavinar, though this was mostly a technicality and the settlement continued to govern itself and continued to do so when the kingdom fell in 277 DR.

The area was first officially recognised in the history books as the city of of Baldur's Gate in 446 DR.

The primary spoken language of the Gate is Chondathan, however during the Spellplague the city attracted enough refugees to become one of Faerûn's most populated cities, and it's a diverse enough location that many people are at least bilingual (not counting Common): many speak Chondathan, their native/ancestral language and a third.

As a major port the city has always been something of a melting pot and encouraged a policy of tolerance - you don't want to drive away merchants and trade, after all. Likewise, in the interests of encouraging trade, the city has enforced a stance of political neutrality and refuses to be drawn into international problems.

Officially, the city prides itself on being welcoming to all ways of life, to the point where anyone and anything goes as long as they obey the laws and don't rock the boat; even the open worship of the majority evil gods is completely unremarkable - what if you want to trade with a place where those gods are a major religion, after all? While Umberlee is worshipped everywhere near the sea (under threat of tidal waves and drowning in retribution for not worshipping her), Baldur's Gate is one of the few places she has an actual temple.

A shrine to any god - regardless of what their faith does or preaches - can be established in any of the temple districts for public worship, and the law will pay it no mind.

This reputation for tolerance and neutrality means it tends to be one of the first choices for refugees and immigrants looking for a new start. The city is extremely crowded, with many people packed into tight spaces and narrow streets, and its population numbers surpassed the metropolis of Waterdeep decades ago; standing at 42,103 people in the 14th century, it has likely more than doubled since. Visitors often find it incredibly - possibly intolerably - loud and busy, while locals consider them to be backwater farmers who don't know what civilisation looks like.

While the city doesn't discriminate legally against any groups, its reputation for tolerance is somewhat overexaggerated. Peoples who are viewed as monstrous by the Realms at large, such as orcs and other goblinoids, or drow, can expect to feel unwelcome as with everywhere else. The recent wave of unwanted human refugees from Calimshan have a strained relationship with the established Baldurians, who view them as foreign and wish they'd just assimilate and start speaking Chondathan already. The city is a human settlement by culture and demographics, retaining its historical human majority, and while the demihuman minorities are part of mundane everyday life, there have been incidents such as in the early 14th century, which saw the rise of The Sure Helm: a human supremacy group who had an issue with the non-humans in their society and were known to carry out hate crimes on the likes of half-elves and half-orcs if they thought they could get away with it.

On a slightly saner note: you have the freedom of religion to worship a god who demands slaves and blood sacrifice, but it's a bad idea to advertise that... Or get caught slaving and murdering, unless you're a very high ranking priest.

Local bards tend to refer to the city as the Cresent moon in their lyrics and poems, after the shape of the city layout. The musical traditions of the Gate focus on "brassy-voiced tenors" and "delightfully smoky altos".

Baldurians frown on drunk, debauched and disorderly behaviour in public: there's no space for this nonsense and you're keeping everybody on the street awake.

The gate has an array of cosmetic services available in the markets of the Wide, where - as well as mundane tattooists and piercers - one can hire wizards in the market to perform cosmetic alterations with transmutation magic: glowing tattoos and other strange illusions, tans, magically affixing gems and jewellery like pieces to your body, changing hair colour, texture and style, changing your eye colour, altering your height or your weight or your sexual dimorphism, etc etc.

It's considered bad luck to harm a cat. Many of the animals moved into the area by hitching a ride on sea traffic, and as they're extremely useful for keeping vermin down both on land and at sea, Baldurians are fond of them.

If you need help carrying your shopping or finding somewhere in the city, most street corners have youths known as "lamp boys" and "lamp lasses" you can hire - so called because of the lanterns they carry at night. With the founding of the newspaper you can also find them hawking the daily papers.

The trade the city brings is the lifeline of the Sword Coast (South), and the only place one can buy foreign and luxury goods in the entire region. That said, these goods come at a significant mark up compared to the prices you'd find in Waterdeep or anywhere in Amn.

The majority of silver trade bars (bars of metal used in place of coins, for ease of transport) are made in the Gate, and the city sets the standards for this form of currency.

The city has always been heavily policed, and is known for being quiet and one of the safest cities in Western Faerûn; Baldurians don't expect much if any major disruption to the city's day-to-day life.

The city has its own City Watch - member of the watch being readily identified by their black helms, bearing a red stripe down one side - however the Flaming Fist Mercenary Company is the first thing that comes to mind when you mention law enforcement; you can barely go more than an hour without seeing at least one uniformed officer.

The City Watch used to be the city's police force, however by the end of the 15th century the Fist has taken on much of their role, and the Watch now functions purely as the private law keepers of the Upper City. They are permitted to live within the Upper City, and positions in the watch are now mostly hereditary.

Even when the Watch was the official city police the Fist boasted an army a thousand strong. By the start of the 15th century the Fist had taken over city patrols in a semi-official capacity. The two groups also overlap, and many of the Watch are also secretly members of the Fist. One in ten people in the gate - Watch or otherwise - are spies and informants for the mercenary company.

They may not be fully reliable as a police force however, as they are known to chose not to deal with some problems, declaring it a problem for the watch to deal with. Notably they do not police the Outer City and refuse to touch anything involving the Undercellar.

The Flaming Fist also has outposts in other realms, where it guards the foreign trade interests of the city, such as Fort Beluarian (a hamlet of 313 people) in the jungles of Chult on the Southern end of Faerûn. Being mercenaries, they are available for hire for any purpose that isn't considered flat out evil.

Of course the heavy policing and massive police presence, to anybody who cares to look closer at the city's outward appearance of security, is a giant tip-off that the city has a thriving underworld. The Thieves Guild is an ever-present force, and the religious tolerance means that there are a lot of other organised crime syndicates (ie the priests), murderers and extortion rackets running around. Such organisations keep close diplomatic ties to the Grand Dukes and the commander of the Flaming Fist.

The weather conditions are typically rain, sleet or fog depending on season and time of day, and the streets and buildings are almost constantly wet either from the weather or the sea. The architecture is almost entirely stone, as it's less likely to rot. The streets are often slippery, and straw or gravel from the river is sometimes thrown over the cobbles for grip. The citizens take advantage of the moisture and damp to use their cellars to cultivate edible fungi. Damp, mould and mildew are a common menace, but it did lead a wizard named Halbazzer Drin to make his fortune by inventing spells that banishes mildew (12gp per casting) and dry out an area without damaging anything (10gp), so services exist if you need to hire them. The spell is not known outside of the city; Drin refused to sell knowledge of the spell to anyone for any price or offer. Due to the damp, the streets have no banners or other hanging fabrics around.

Buildings tend to be tall and narrow, with shuttered slit windows placed high up, which will be firmly shut at night and all day in winter, to keep out the gales and invading gulls looking for places to nest. The extremely narrow streets of the Lower City are full of window planters and hanging baskets of flowers, providing the sole spot of colour amongst the grey. As the city streets are so steep and narrow, the city has a ban on allowing animals larger than a dog into the city (it's too difficult for them to navigate and likely to cause traffic issues).

Boxed in by its thick, heavily fortified city walls and with no space to expand the city has largely built upwards, and the streets are filled with stone buttresses and arches supporting the upper floors.

Due to its stony architecture and frequent overcast, the entire city is often referred to as the Grey Harbour by residents. (This is also the name of the actual city harbour)

The city is built into the chalk white cliffs around the harbour, growing in elevation until the settlement stops at the outermost walls.

By the 15th century, the city was firmly divided into the Lower and Upper Cities, the latter of which is built into the highest elevation, cut off by a wall. In the population boom that followed the mass immigration of Spellplague refugees, many people were forced to make space for themselves outside of the walls, building the Outer City. Beneath the city lies the Undercellar

Descending from the Undercellar is a labyrinth of tunnels leading down into caverns buried beneath Baldur's Gate; housing the ruins of a forgotten era, where the Temple of Bhaal stands over the ruins, surrounded by the restless spirits and walking corpses of undead residents ancient and brand new.

The Lower City houses most of the city, crafts and trade.

With the narrow spaces, cliffs, tall buildings and arches, the city can get rather dark at night. What public lighting is available is maintained by the citizens themselves. The wealthier parts of the Lower City, like Bloomridge, use oil and wick copper bowls, while poorer areas make do with candles in tin lanterns, usually such things are mounted on the walls and ceilings of the darkest corners; but when you want to navigate at night you'll usually be hiring lamp lads.

The Grey Harbour is one of Toril's most famous and best ports, frequented by legitimate merchant captains and pirates alike; many of the families living on the docks are the families of sailors. The area is very industrialised, sporting the shipyard, multiple cranes and railway tracks used to facilitate the moving of goods. The most notable structures are the Harbourmaster's Office, a tiny building with barred windows that deals with all trades and taxes - and the Water Queen's House at the end of the pier, which everybody with a brain makes offerings to and nobody looks too closely at whatever the Umberlant priests get up to in there, because the vast majority of people like breathing.

The Gate has little in the way of large fanciful festivals, but specific streets in the Lower City are prone to a centuries old tradition of "cobble parties", where the people living on a street pull up some chairs, benches and barrels and gather outside to share a mild drink, tell stories and chat. An ongoing cobble party can be recognised by the bright rose-red torches that are hung up along the street walls - these torches are made at Felogyr's Fireworks and can be bought almost anywhere in the city.

Bloomridge is as close the Upper City as you can get without actually gaining access, and houses the Gate's middle class. It was initially built in elevated platforms cimbing up the Upper City's walls using magic and Gondian engineering. It's various attractions - including fanciful architecture, florists, artisanal boutiques, fancy open-air kaeth houses (cafes) and dining houses (restaurants; also known as "skaethars" or "feasthalls"), and elaborate hanging gardens and floral arcades - made it attractive to those with wealth but no pedigree.

The district expanded as those who could afford to do so began purchasing and razing the original, less fancy buildings in the vicinity and building estates on the ground where they used to stand. Those who can't quite afford that instead opt to live in high class apartment buildings and flats over the local businesses. Buildings here often have rooftop gardens and balconies with pleasant vistas.

The Upper City is located in the oldest quarter of the city, the Lower City being built outside of the walls and stretching down to the harbour and then having the lower city walls constructed around it. The only gate connecting the two halves is the eponymous Baldur's Gate, the first of the many city gates constructed. It's also heavily guarded and the only gate by which outsiders may access the Upper City; there are numerous smaller gates, but they are exclusively used by patriars and those bearing family livery or bearing a letter of employment signed by a patriar. This district houses the Gate's oldest and most powerful families: anyone who isn't a patriar is either a servant or a watchman, who will most likely be a member of a family that has served a patriar family/the Upper City for generations. The exceptions tend to be a handful of the most successful and affluent business owners whose businesses have become popular enough with the nobility to be welcomed in. Every business and city service in this district exists to serve the upper class exclusively.

It's the most open and colourful part of the city; the shutters and doors are painted in fresh, vibrant paints. The streets are broad and well lit with ornate enchanted lamps; the terrain is mostly flat, unlike the streets of the Lower City, which can often resemble giant staircases.

Businesses that would cause unpleasant smells are banned from the area, and the Upper City maintains many gardens, windowsill planters and trellises where flowers bloom and fill the air with pleasant scents (unless you have hay fever, anyway). Wandering minstrels provide ambient music as they wander the streets - usually a singer playing a lute or harp accompanied by a flutist and perhaps a drummer who may provide a chorus.

They've also got drains, so the streets are less inclined to flood or turn to mud the way the rest of the city is.

There are no inns or alehouses here: a noble who wishes to drink will either host a party, attend a private club, or go slumming in the Lower City.

The Upper City houses the High Hall, also known as the ducal palace; the administrative building that provides a place for feasts, court hearings and government meetings. The meeting rooms are and have always been open for public use, however there is a rule that states you cannot rent a meeting room there twice within 48 hours (to stop people from monopolising the rooms). The High Hall used to be a more grim, military building but has since been renovated to appear more bright and friendly as a PR stunt following a giant riot over taxes.

The other two of the city's temples are located in the Upper City, the Lady's Hall - a Temple of Tymora - and the High House of Wonders, the temple of Gond (who is near enough the city's patron god). The building serves various purposes: a temple, workshops, factories and laboratories. When something deemed ready for the eye is released it can usually be viewed in the Hall of Wonders: a science museum across the street to the temple.

It's also where the Gate's largest marker - the Wide - is situated. It's the only large open space in the city, and the only open air market. Outside of festivals, performances and music is banned in the area. The Wide is usually packed with people forced to stand shoulder-to-shoulder, and those who are hired to perform deliveries in the Wide are always tall and large, capable of seeing over the heads of the throngs and pushing their way through. Goods are carried atop tall poles that are strapped to the deliverymen's chests or backs. Prices are lowest in the Wide compared to anywhere else, and any transactions that cannot be performed within a licensed store must take place here by law.

Permits to rent space in the Wide for the day are limited, and they usually go to whoever has the money to bribe the bailiff, watchmen and other officials who have sway in over the market's administration - which is usually the merchants of the Upper City.

As well as the usual fare of goods, the Wide offers a large range of cosmetic services including the mundane body modifications and stylists that one would find on Earth, and more esoteric concepts that can only be accomplished with magic; such services and the artisans who provide them are seasonal and ever changing. The Wide is the most colourful spot in the city, and the only place that's the exception to the lack of banners and other hanging fabrics. Historically the Wide was open all day and night, but in recent times the watch has been closing the area at dusk - nobody except for the patriars may have use of the Upper City after dark.

The Wide is only closed if the area must be used for something else, such as public Highharvestide festivals... or because a patriar decided to close it off for private use, such as a ball or wedding.

Just outside of the market area is the rest of the Upper City's commercial area; stores, insurance offices, trade guildhalls, Ramazith's tower and the public entrance to the Undercellar - a flight of stone stairs leading down to a pair of heavy oak doors at the southern edge of the market. The doors are shut, but the Undercellar never closes and if you knock somebody will open them and usher you inside.

The Undercellar is a maze of underground passages lying beneath the city - mostly vaulted stone chambers created from the interconnected and abandoned cellars of the old Upper City, with hidden exits all over the city. Those who know where these exits are tend to guard them jealously, but may be willing to allow the Thieves' Guild access for coin or service. The Guild itself controls a fair few of these exits, and has been working on expanding the network.

It's also the playground for the criminal underworld of the Gate. The Undercellar's public image is that of a rather unprincipled festhall (a specific form of adult entertainment venue in the Realms that serves as a fusion of casino, bar, lounge, spa, brothel, playground, BDSM scene, LARPing club and so forth), which in a way, it is. Due to its dangerous reputation, it's incredibly popular, especially with those who are trying to look edgy and dangerous (particularly teenagers).

If one is openly carrying weapons, you can expect the armed guards stationed in the room to start following you closely; otherwise they'll leave you be. The guards are unlikely to care much about any disturbances, so long as they don't start disrupting everybody's business. Customers are not to venture further into the Undercellar without permission and an escort.

And behind that edgy, but mostly harmless veneer visitors play at and never see past is the real Undercellar, which is every bit as dark as its rumoured to be.

The Guild has its offices down here, and other rooms are used for varying purposes by other criminals. Want to put a hit on somebody, watch somebody get murdered in a Bhaalist red room, smuggle people or whatever crimes against humanity you feel like seeking out, this'd be the place to do it.

The Undercellar is policed by nobody except the criminals who do their work down there; whatever might take place down there, neither the Watch nor the Fists have any desire to know about them if you try and bring them to light. Want to avoid bad things? Don't get involved with the Undercellar.

The sprawling, pitch-black maze - if one knows how to navigate it - is a good way to get around the Upper City without detection. Somewhere down there is a passage that goes deeper, leading further into the earth and into the Undercity.

The Undercity is, clue in the name, the dead remains of a city buried beneath the living Baldur's Gate (specifically the original city that became the Upper City). At its heart is the Temple of Bhaal, and the city is inhabited by Bhaalists, alive and dead; the original, now undead, inhabitants of the undercity and any victims of the temple that have joined them.

The Outer City, Cliffgate and Blackgate are not technically parts of the city, being constructed outside of them.

The soil surrounding the city is little use for agriculture, but it is sufficient for grazing, so most farmers are the likes of shepherds and cattle farmers. As livestock and large animals are not permitted inside the city, cattle markets, stables and such businesses will be found there. Many of the less pleasant businesses, such as butchers and tanners, have relocated here to spare the rest of the city the smell and mess.

Much of the structures are semi-permanent in nature, and the areas are not subject to official oversight or in possession of any particular infrastructure. They aren't policed by the Fist or the watch, the area is near enough lawless, and crime is frequent. "Security" tends to be overseen by the Guild, and while the government doesn't tax outside the walls, residents still have to pay their dues to the local thieves and thugs.

The Outer City is as crowded as the Lower City, but less sanitary or orderly: these places are dirty, loud, smell a lot and tend to be quite dangerous. Many of the residents are farmers, criminals and foreigners and immigrants of varying generation who can't afford or find a place in the city proper.

The Blackgate is the historical slum area, and grew around the inland-facing Black Gate to the North West, growing around the Trade Way connecting The Gate to Waterdeep.

The Tumbledown district, located in Cliffgate outside the city gate of the same name, is the middle child of the expansions, leading down the cliffs. The land was owned by the Szarr family generations ago, before they were all (supposedly) slaughtered by a rival family in the night. Tumbledown is an extremely foggy area, full of graveyards and tombs, and rumours abound that the ghosts of the dead Szarrs haunt the streets there and steal people away. People do disappear there, but most people are sceptical that it's due to ghosts.

The Outer City is a newer, larger slum that grew around the Basilisk Gate and spread along the Coast Way - the road between the Gate and Athkatla - as the city population exploded at the end of the 14th century.

Immigrant communities have taken the opportunity to build their own settlements in the Outer City, styled in their own architectural styles, such as Little Calimshan; a tenement on Wyrm's Crossing is exclusively occupied by halflings; Whitkeep houses a gnomish community who does most of the city's tinsmithing; half-orcs lodge in Stoneyes; a shield dwarven community is located in Shieldgate.

These communities are considered outsiders by most Baldurians, and generally there's no love lost between those inside the walls and outside.

#...the Durge player in me is looking at all the various ways one could go undercover as an assassin I must admit #Karlach is actually a good example of how surnames work in the Realms: she was born/raised in Cliffgate so it's her “surname”#long post

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captainzigo · 2 months

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since I have been making my little pony comics for the past few months, I have basically forgotten what every single one of my duckverse comic prompts means. I had a big list full of one sentence prompts for duckverse comics that I was going to make, and I was reading through it yesterday, because I thought about making one. I was surprised to find out that I have no idea what any of them mean. instead of just deleting the list, I have decided to share with you. For what good it will do you. Think of this as a little shout out to the people who followed me for duckverse content. i havent forgotten about you. it’s also a little peek in my twisted mind. my horrible creation process. a behind the scenes look from hell. the list of prompts is below the break

max college fund

launchpad rescue hero

costco 22¢ per bite

house of mouse

door to darkness

because i’m hispanic?

donald cousins catch and release

fish wife

the greatest skateboard trick in the seven seas

backyardagins movie

evil versions boy band

gladstone gay moms

the poor part of town

private army of freaks vs my boys

you own the town. you are politics - what do you think taxes are for - not gladstone bail - id be doing everyone a favor

kids table is great actually

donald cry gold swim

beautiful gold moon

villains table

these lovebirds

gladstone can’t read

gladstone hyper specific thrift store shirt

louie seeing anyone right now?

managed my uncle’s finances

june dolls episode

may louie webs spy episode

house of mouse christmas hdl want to come

propeller cap start to turn. big wind. its a helicopter landing. thanks babe

double gay batteries

daisy likes donald snoring

if you can understand anything he says then yeah!

sora. quack pack. bald monkey

i respect your pronouns. i dont not respect YOU scrooge

why are you friends with my rival’s girlfriend

we’re sisters now too???

The dancing hacker - do you know how hard it is to lucid dream

are you guys playing dancing hacker?

how did you do that? Those dice were rigged i mean.

you guys were supposed to prepare a musical number every session

Lady in pink but with a knife

girl boss? No girl lady. But not a girl.

sephirof at the door. never seen Donald that serious in my life.

I have a superhero alter ego - like super Grover?

louie x robin the frog

daffy: i’m getting you a job in Hollywood, kid! You gonna make big times. Why? uh… i’m friends with your mom.

Duckburg community college is the only community college that does dance scholarship

duckberg community ducks, and the Duckburg University geese

in helicopter: you ever going to get tired of having our dates like this? no never.

donald take responsibility for our son! panchito what

babe your costume is terrible. why are you still in a sailor hat

tasha austin gay lesbian solidarity

hey webby! *glittery hands*

webby diary

shake for trust? glitter on hand. body slam

why did t you tell me your girlfriend is a pilot? tasha said i shouldn’t tell you because of what happened to you pilot ex. he’s still alive!

pablo: sleeper agents be like time for my next mission

CHRISTMAS GIFTS

WHATS UP T-BOYS?

donald’s boyfriends what does gladstone have against gay people

donald you should wingman for me. i thought you were gay

dugan duck is your secret kid isn’t he

huey ponytail

donald has three boyfriends why can’t i have two

woops i mexed up their super powers - let’s go, t boys! i didn’t make them trans! they were like that before, right?

your brother donald has like five partners. yeah and i’m not my brother donald. you’re right. i should date your brother donald

dewey damn girl your ass phat what are your pronouns. katy nun/ya

tying normie trans girl to a chair turbo pablo

don’t worry. the promise ring is just a tracking device

punch buggy gets steadily more and more violent

dewey’s many licenses

duck twins cobwebs

beaks: help! #911

katy can not entertain in her tiny trailer

uno gaydar donald i finally give you a job and you’re being gay on the clock??

when mom comes in and you have to hide your DS under your pillow

HDL Tulin

HDL chart

#ducktales #ducktales 2017 #donald duck #dt17 #duckverse

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notasapleasure · 1 year

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Hustle S07E.04 (2011)

Once more I am apologising for posting approximately ONE MILLION screenshots, and also for being gullible about the nature of Hustle. This was a delight in the end, but I left my live reactions as they are.

---

Another staple of BBC TV that I. Never watched. (if you wonder why I pay my license fee, it’s as I said before: rugby. So the Joplin-blogging will only be happening in between 6 Nations matches this weekend).

Danush...already does not spark joy D:

God this is exhausting look at all these old men running around, I'm going to have a heart-attack just watching them...

HEY THAT'S WEDGE

Benny is Denis Lawson! Aww, I think Brasso and Wedge would get on brilliantly. That's not how this is going to go down in this episode.

His nickname is The Dentist.

I'm going to say he'd get on with Lee from Utopia :')

If you're squeamish about 'unscheduled extractions' this one won't be for you!

There's a lot of bigging up of how awful and smart and horrible Danush is, but very little Danush thus far.

Hangs out at the boxing gym, wears good suits. Casually beats up goons in broad daylight.

I don't know the lady Hustler's name* (*Emma) but:

She's right.

It's a Look.

Montage montage montage - ooh!

Not the most flattering shot, but for interested parties: the gnarly arm scar is there!

Also he has a pet rottweiler aww. He even chose his password for dear Tyson, the fool :')

He's not interested in boxing at the Olympics, has no sense of humour and I don't know enough about Iranian accents to scrutinise that one too closely...

Bleurghhh so many swishy fast-paced camera cuts I feel seasick

Walk walk fashion baby

It's his turf guys, get off it

Head empty. So pretty. He can take my teeth I don't mind I just want to smell him.

Also for him to not talk, I think that accent is probably Bad.

u ok Jo?

No I uh....just...uhh

Me, having a Perfectly Normal One: I’d let him gut me like a fish, sure.

So the deal ends in Danush nicking the cash...and...

SCREAM

HE'S A BIG ADORABLE GEORDIE BABY WORKING WITH WEDGE!!!!!!! LOOK AT THAT SMILE YOU CAN ALMOST HEAR THE ACCENT DHJSKSHDGKFKFFG

LOOK at this big brown-eyed baby dealing with scary gangsters oh sweetheart no you’re too soft for this

Aww the double-crossers got double-crossed. Hope he and Wedge don't get their legs cut off by Vic :(

Aw he really was all front! Once The CrewTM were onto him he got very easily screwed over.

Lloyd the Geordie is outta here, mon! And Benny's off to Tehran.

Rating

Dead? Nope! Consensus is that Vic won’t care about his legs, only Benny’s.

Evil? Absolutely not, not a drop of malice in his body, just a big cuddly Rottweiler-loving darling.

Affects the plot? Well, not as such, I’d say. He does what Benny tells him to do, and then he scarpers. Not really any agency of his own.

This was a delight, and Joplin looks fine, both as mad Darius and sweet Lloyd. 4/5 again, because I’m still waiting for him to play a character who gets a little more background and motivation of his own, and at least some kind of resolution. A girl can dream!

But also now please give me my Star Wars Hustle AU where post-canon, everyone survives, Brasso and Wedge get a team together to get Cassian and Jyn out of trouble.

#adventures in joplin sibtain's imdb page #joplin sibtain #bbc hustle #look at me getting taken in by everything these days :')#THAT SMILE WHEN HE REVEALS HIMSELF AS LLOYD THE GEORDIE THOUGH OML

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harleiquina · 11 months

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The Cursed prince

A Snowhite retelling.

I've been thinking about this for a while, and as any writer can tell you: the best ideas come in the most unexpected times (in this case I woke up at 4 & something in the morning because my dogs needed to do their bussiness, and I just couldn't go back to sleep. So now at 5:22 I mentally finished this version of the story that was nothing more than an idea for the past few months). Enjoy! Because I know that I'll hate myself when I'll get sleepy at work later today.

So it was true.

Since birth he was destined to lose everyone he ever loved. His mother was the first one, the very same day he gave his first breath. He couldn't even see her once.

His father followed, a few years later. He was kind and warm but strict, as all kings should be. He loved his son but wanted to be sure that the power of their bloodline would never get on his head. What kind of king could that kid become if all of his wildest dreams were granted to him? The child needed limits, so the father gave him exactly that. He was an exceptional man.

Then came Father Solar. The King asked in his death bed for his son to be raised in the monastery that his family build, to have the best education he could have and learn how to be a man on God. All the priests there were dedicated to their task, but Father Solar would let the kid be a child, climbing trees, going fishing, running through the fields and playing with marbles (he taught the prince the most impresive tricks with them behind the other monks' backs). After his death, the prince, now a young man, went to his castle trying to leave the pain behind and to "grow up".

Many friends (because thats what they were, not just soldiers) died in foreing lands, sometimes in battle, others by believed-to-be friendly hands and others in minor incidents where, in a ironic twist of fate, they were trying to avoid any kind of conflict.

Many of his servants, that took care of him, like the cook that always made him smile when he needed it the most also died. Everybody tried to convince him that they were old and nature took it's course but then how could anyone explain that her little daughter, a child that the prince thought of as the little sister he never had, just never woke up without explanation?

The prince was more and more convinced that he was cursed. And now he had the worst reminder of it.

A year ago or so, he had to go to a neighbouring kingdom to participate in the wedding of the king, a long friend of his father. He was marrying for the second time, many thought that it was too soon, to a younger woman whose great beauty was a little suspicious to folks who believed her to be a witch or an evil wooden sprite under a glamour spell.

The prince got easily bored next to the other royals next to him that doubled his age (or even tripled it!) and kept on telling the same stories over and over again with more and more details as the wine began to flow. And then he saw her, the king's daughter, a lovely young girl almost his age with raven hair that made her look extremely pale. People called her Snowhite but he thought that it was a poor choice of a name because her smile alone was as warm as a summer breeze.

He couldn't take his eyes off of her. She was graceful, kind and smart enough to get one of her father's friends to back track a statement he made about his people's labour. She noticed the prince and every time she caught him looking at her, she'd smile as an invitation to join her. But he would turn and walk away.

Yet she was decided to breach that distance, so she asked him to dance. He tried to refuse but as soon as their hands touched, the wall that he was building between them fell apart.

The world disappeared when she was in his arms and so did any kind of fear he felt about losing her. They looked each other in the eyes and inside of hers he saw the possibility of having a future, a family, happiness at last. His entire existence was bound to hers, he could feel himself turning his own life, body and soul so she could do with them as she pleased. He was brought back to reality by her touch, she was concerned, wiping away a tear from his eyes. He apologized and left the party, the castle and country altogether.

A few months later came a letter requiring him to go back to that kingdom for a funeral, his heart was already breaking before he could read that it was the king's. He felt bad for his relieved sigh and the small joy of finding out that she was safe. At least for now.

The solemnity of the ceremony didn't helped with his constant dread. But how could he try to ignore her when she looked absolutely destroyed and alone? Without a word they hugged and she broke down in tears in the safety of his arms. They walked through the gardens to clear their minds. If there was anything he had enough experience about it was pain and how to deal with it. She asked him to come back to visit, he couldn't refuse and both promise to write each other whenever needed.

He returned a few months later, the queen gave him all kinds of attentions but he couldn't see where his friend was. His host tried to tempt him to join her to a hunting trip, or to watch a play, or read next to the fire but he didn't cared about those things so he said that the travel left him exhausted and needed some rest. Of course, instead of going to his room, he wandered through the palace until he saw her. She was dressed in rags like the servants, carrying a sack of flour to the kitchen. She tried to calm him down, it wasn't that bad for her... she always helped as much as she could in the castle, this wasn't new and she would prove it in the kitchen where she baked a delicious cake for them to eat. He still believed that it wasn't fair to her to live in those conditions, but she reassured him that the pain of her father's death made her realized that she needed a change. He wondered how much of that she thought herself and how much of it were her stepmother's words.

He came back many times and tried not to take too much time between his visits. The queen would always try to keep him busy but he always found a way to explore the forest with his Northern Star as he started to call the princess because the shine of her eyes and the contrast of her hair and skin reminded him of a starry night, and he would always follow her to feel like he was at home again.

Then, one day, she was nowhere to be found. The servants were too afraid to speak and the Queen ignored all of his questions. He left the castle and went to the forest to the place they both called their kingdom, where all secrets were kept like that first kiss by the oldest oak tree under the summer rain. She was there, waiting who knows for how long and held him tight while tears flooded her eyes. She told him that the queen was jealous, that expelled her from the castle and promised to punish anyone that wanted to help her. He offered to take her with him, to keep her safe, to be her loving husband and leave everything behind. But this time she refused, she knew about the queen's intentions towards him and couldn't risk starting a war. She assured him that she was well taken care of and that one day, when everything calmed down, she would go with him and never again part ways. It was a bittersweet goodbye, with the softest kiss that would've torn apart even the bravest of all souls.

He rejected any invitation and letter from the queen, as well as her delegations with presents. She even dared to try to reach him through other kingdoms, yet the response was always the same.

One night he woke up with a fear he hadn't felt in years. A premonition. The storm outside of his window darkened his troubled heart and decided to ride to meet his Northen Star again before anything could happen. He had to save her. He could not afford to lose her.

The wind and the water seemed to be against him, forcing him to take the longest road. Rivers were overflooded, the mud didn't let his horse move, trees were plucked out of the soil as easy as any other weed at hands of a gardener.

With the early morning lights, the storm started to fade away but he was still too far from her. His journey continued, he had no time to rest or eat.

And then he arrived.

It was too late.

His knees failed him, kneeling in the mud he cannot stop looking at her in a bed of flowers. Even through his tears she looked as if she was just sleeping pacefully under the morning sun. The townspeople were saying their goodbyes to their princess. Some recognized him and shared his pain, but there's nothing else to be done. If the rumours are true, the queen found a way to poison her and there is no antidote that could help now.

"What have I done? Is my existence such an offense to this world that I do not deserve to be loved? Life, what have I done to you? Why do you keep on taking innocent lives instead of mine? What kind if cruel game are you playing with me? Why her? She's done nothing to you, unless giving me a reason to believe that you are beautiful is a sin that can only be cleansed by death. Earth was greener, the air sweeter and the sun warmer with her alive. What do I have to do? Lock myself in my castle out of sight and wait to the end of my days, just living off the memory of her lips in mine? Answer at once! I beg you..."

People stared at him but just one old woman came to help him get back on his feet.

"My dear boy, I'm sorry. None of this was meant to happen if I followed the rules... but when you spend so much time among your kind as I did it's almost impossible not to get soft" her voice was kind and she was fixing his clothes like a mother would.

"Who are you?" he asked while she was cleaning his face.

"My name is long forgotten and humanity decided that I am two: Life and Death. But it's only me. I take care of both tasks, maybe it would've been easier if I was two different people" she grabbed his arm and guide him to a rock so they could sit and talk. "And that's why it all began. The night you were born, you were supposed to die but I knew that your parents wanted a child more than anything. They've tried many times and after your death, your mother would've never gotten pregnant again. They were very nice, loved by everyone and always put others first. They deserved a gift, a baby as they always wanted... even if that meant that someone else had to take his place in the Afterlife. Your father understood it, once he held you in his arms, that it wasn't your fault, that you were too precious to be blamed for your mother's death. So he loved you even more than you can imagine. However, consecuences come when things don't go the right way. Your parents and friends would've lived longer if you didn't existed, yes, but that doesn't mean that they died because of you... is the course of destiny, it's just that the dates were readjusted. In her case, you extended her life. If you didn't take her for a walk on her father's funeral, she would've gone straight into her bedroom where the queen would've killed her to make it look like a suicide. Her stepmother couldn't try anything later because she had many guests to attend but every single time that something bad was about to happen, a memory of you made her take a different decision... another road... another fate. But as I said, dates get readjusted, they are never erased. The Evil Queen got her anyway. Such a pity." The prince didn't felt any better "You are not cursed, my dear. You are blessed, you are the strongest testimony that life is a gift that should not be squandered. So live, and share your life with those that make it worthwhile." The woman caressed his hair and walked away. life is a gift that should not be squandered. So live, and share your life with those that make it worthwhile." The woman caressed his hair and walked away.

He stood there watching the others crying and leaving flowers, even if the pain was cutting deep they were not feeling it as bad as he. People would go back to their homes, move foward with their lives and eventually let it go. But not him.

He took some courage and got closer to her. He took her hand, kissed it and pressed it against his face. This time she couldn't wipe his tears like before.

"Life is a gift that shouldn't be squandered... but I only wanted to share it with you" he said before kissing her lips for the last time. Still with his eyes closed he pressed his forehead with hers and sighed. He tought that the morning breeze was fooling him pretending to be her breath he could even hear her voice in it. "You came back" she said, like every time they met again. He started to cry but his tears were stopped by a hand. He opened his eyes and saw her smiling at him. "You came back" he answered before lifting her in his arms and kissing her again.

#harleiquina's retellings #my writing #snowhite #i'm not crying you're crying #writing #my art #aspiring author #the only good thing of getting more Disney remakes is that it challenges me to write more #like c'mon you can reinvent a classic story you don't need to do a frame by frame remake #writeblr #Did I started at 5:22 AM and finished at 8:35 AM #you bet I did

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randomitemdrop · 3 years

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If you're still bored, how about d100 rumors?

Table of Rumors

So, what are the villagers whispering around the pub? (Adapt as needed to your setting, and remember that rumors aren’t always true)

An infamous item-shop owner is actually a fraud and has no idea what he’s doing

One of the party members is secretly in service to the Dark Lord

One of the party members is secretly in service to the Merchants’ Guild, ensuring that the party keeps having to buy more stuff

The Dark Lord is secretly in service to the Merchants’ Guild and their entire evil plan is a hoax to stimulate the economy

Mimics in service to the Dark Lord have infiltrated the village

The Dark Lord’s secret weakness is Essence of (consult Table of Flavors & Scents)

The Dark Lord’s secret weakness is getting stabbed with a cheap tin dagger

The Dark Lord’s secret weakness is catgirls

The local forest has been infested with Cascadian Tree-Krakens

The local counting-house has been infested with Modrons

The local fishing-hole has been infested with Dire Crawdads

The local lake is secretly home to a Fey woman that gives out swords proclaiming the wielder to be the true king of the land

The local spring is actually a portal to the Plane of Water, but only when activated correctly

A nearby swamp is home to a wish-granting hag

A nearby swamp is home to a reclusive retired bard, once famous across the land

A nearby swamp is home to Shrek

A nearby swamp is actually a bog

Deep in the forest there grows a patch of herbs that will cure any illness or wound

Deep in the forest there grows a patch of herbs that make anything taste good

Deep in the forest there grows a patch of herbs that double your strength for four hours

Deep in the forest there grows a patch of herbs that will kill anything mortal

Deep in the forest there grows a patch of herbs that will get you zonked off your gourd

At the top of a nearby mountain there is a shrine to a forgotten deity from beyond the stars

At the top of a nearby mountain there is a shrine to a long-dead celebrity musician where Bards can learn special spells

A nearby cave is haunted by the ghosts of a massacred army

A nearby cave is haunted by the ghosts of cavemen

Long ago, fleeing royals hid a magic sword up the chimney of one of the local homes

One of the local merchants/tradespeople is actually a psychic vampire that nourishes itself by providing the worst possible customer service

A local farm has a chicken that will grant wishes if you pet it without letting the owner know

The local pub owner was once a bandit and buried treasure under the floorboards

The town drunk knows where a treasure is hidden but will only explain when sober

The town Prohibition Society president knows where a treasure is hidden but will only explain when drunk

The weird old man that lives outside town dresses up as a monster to frighten people off his property

The weird old man that lives outside town dresses up as a monster and has won awards at furry conventions for his monster suits

The local blacksmith’s hammer is enchanted so that he can strengthen armor just by hitting it

The local butcher will buy exotic meats, no questions asked

The local baker’s buns are enchanted so that it is addictive

The local candlestick-maker uses dwarf-tallow

The local cooper is the Queen’s paramour, which is how he's kept his license despite his barrels being absolute rubbish

The local cobbler is assisted by Elves. Nobody seems to know if that means traditional tiny magical spirits or, like, a band of Drow warriors bound to his service

The local nightsoilman is the true Crown Prince, having switched places with a lookalike after getting the idea from an episode of “Wishbone” and/or “Garfield: a Tail of Two Kitties” and/or any of the three different Barbie CGI adventures based around the idea

The local grave-digger kills people when business is slow

The local pie-maker kills people when business is slow

The local oyster-seller is secretly rich off pearls

The local arkwright (maker of chests) is actually a breeder of Mimics

The local carpetmaker is actually a breeder of Trappers

The local schrimpshonger will pay dearly for strange and exotic teeth, the bigger the better

The local relic-keeper is a fake

The local phrenologist is legit, somehow

The local cheesemonger can tell your fortune from the bite patterns you leave in a rind

The local pardoner has a direct line to the Celestial Bureaucracy

The local doctor is a vampire

The local tobacconist has some primo shit in the back that he only brings out if he knows you’re cool

The local town guard used to be an adventurer like you, then he took an arrow in the knee

The local town’s rival tater-hurling team has magic on their side, so the locals are looking for an edge

The local mayor is secretly a witch

The local mayor is secretly an avatar of the Dark Lord

The local mayor is secretly two Halflings with one sitting on the other’s shoulders, having achieved office through a cavalcade of hilarious hijinks and desperate to maintain the ruse

The Royal Palace’s knights are actually just empty suits of armor animated by dark magic

The Royal Palace’s knights are actually just empty suits of armor filled with bees

The Royal Palace’s knights are actually illusions and the building is actually defenseless

Eating raw pork increases your strength, the tainteder the better

Man door hook hand carriage door

Putting out all the lights and speaking a wizard’s name into a mirror five times will open a portal to wherever they are

Living near windmills causes cancer

Electrical shocks cure rheumatism

Goblin saliva cures acne

The smell of Bonnacon dung cures respiratory illness

Giant blood replenishes vitality and cures hangovers

Powdered Tiefling horns are an aphrodisiac

Dwarves lay golden eggs when enraged

Pulling Elves’ ears is good luck

Stealing an adventurer’s helmet is good luck

It’s good luck to ignore Aasimar, pretending they aren’t there

People with even a little bit of Dragon blood in their veins are incapable of lying

Feeding a Halfling is bad luck

Druids are aggressive assholes that try to convince everyone else to become Druids

Orcs are disguised humans

Mind-flayers can actually survive on totally normal food and drink, and they’re just flaying minds to be jerks

People with red hair are werewolves

Kicking a Cleric of a deity besides the one you follow in the butt cures curses

Flossing with the hair from a wizard’s beard cures toothache and gum disease

Church wine can be used to remove any stain

The Chosen One has arisen and can be recognized by (insert trait held by party member)

The Chosen One has arisen and can be recognized by being invulnerable to blades

The Chosen One has arisen and a cutting from their hair is proof against the Plague

Many adventurers are actually thought-constructs without free will, controlled by the whims of giant deities living on a higher plane rolling dice

The Royal Palace is trying to hide from the populace that the world is actually round/flat/cylindrical/toroidal/&c.

The Plague vaccines being provided by the Royal Palace secretly contain Potion of Enfeeble Mind to allow them to control the populace more securely

The local ruins were constructed by Extraplanars (note: if this is already true in your setting, instead the rumor is that the Extraplanars are a hoax by the Royal Palace)

Certain unusual clouds are the product of the Alchemists’ Guild trying to control the weather

The gladiator matches are fixed

A famous bard died years ago and was replaced by a look-alike

A famous bard is hypnotizing people with their music

Zalgo is coming

The world is going to end next year

A major chain of food stalls actually uses bio-alchemically-engineered Oozes instead of real meat

The Holy Books have hidden messages that can be decoded by those that know the secret method

The town charter is secretly a treasure map

https://www.snopes.com/random/

#tables #long post

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hoodoobarbie · 3 years

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The mythology of the Siren, Mermaid, Water Spirits & Mami Wata and it’s origins within black feminity.

Today I had to listen to other another black woman rant about how mermaids/sirens/mami wata are evil low key. So this educational post was born in response.

Did you really think the divine essence of the black feminine wouldn’t protect itself ? That energy exists for a reason. Suddenly it’s evil, to have teeth and protect yourself from predators. Water is a precious resource. You will be tested to see if you are deserving of it or not. Also these spirits will defend natural resources so they don’t get fucked up by human greed.

It’s common for some places in Africa for people to offer the Sirens/Mami Wata/Water spirits or make an offerings/contracts with them in order to use the resources on their land. It also keeps the white ppl away too because they cause so much trouble.

Sirens are also associated with being the killers of children and men, but often this is completely misrepresented intentionally.

Men fear the power of the siren because she can override the patriarchy at core and can completely unravel them. The orgins of many water spirits lie in matriachal societies, temples divine feminine and motherhood. This is why temples and sacred magikal knowledge was intentionally destroyed and stolen, especially to empower the white patriarch.

Sirens are also described as thiefs of children and child killers. Sirens have been known to kidnap kids who were being abused or have were murdered near water and take them to their kingdom to restore them.

Sometimes the child returns, sometimes they are not. However in general they are big on kidnapping people, mostly women and giving them powers, if they decide to return. The idea of them eating and killing children, was a lie perpetuated by Greeks to cover up some truly horrific acts. Unfortunate these false accusations have been allowed to continue to perpetuate.

If a siren is acting in a predatory way, there is a reason why as their energy as been disturbed. Sirens are natural guardians.

So the real question is . . . what did you do ? Did you destroy their habitat ? Abuse a child or a person ? Commit an egregious act against a woman ie rape/murder etc ? Disrespect a sacred place, the land, the seas or rivers ? Steal precious resources that weren’t yours to take ?

These sacred traditions are more than just deities, spirits and our ancestors. All forms of ATR are access to our spiritual mind state as an entire community. When you move in Vodou, you can sense the whole of black consciousness and all of our problem spots, specifically areas that need healing.

Oxum-Oshun, Olokun, Yemaya, the Mami Wata, La Baliene, La Siren, Met Agwe, The Simbi - these are all spirits with a connection to waters. Water is life and has always been inherently associated feminine energy. I’m not going into detail about all these cross connections but let’s chat about La Sirene, specifically.

La Sirene, Queen of all Mermaids is more than just a powerful sorceress and queen of song/music and dreams, she is also a keeper of secrets an a guardian of sacred memories & knowledge.

Many of the souls of slaves, from the Transatlantic slave trade that were thrown off the boats into the ocean are her children, citizens and warriors now. She comforts them eternally & they live in paradise. That doesn’t mean all of these souls are at rest, plenty continuously ask their mother if they will be avenged, especially the young children. She also has a close connection with the Indigenous Taino. The isle of Hispaniola also known as Haiti (Ayiti) & the Dominican Republic is her most known domain.

Let’s not act like slavery and colonization was a cake walk. Rape was common place and mermaids, water spirits offered African and Indigenous women protection and power over men. They became demonized overtime for their hypnotic powers and killing men, who often overstepped their boundaries. Women could leave offerings to these spirits, work or commune with them and be quickly avenged or gain great power and wealth. All of this was threatening to the white patriarchal standard.

La Sirene’s presence in Haiti and other merfolk tales that float around the Caribbean/West Indies, is not without purpose. She has ties to many people and many different cultures. Her sacred symbols are global. This is why I speculate she is much older than people think. La Sirene, is a fairly young evolution. She clearly has ties to much older things. Her older names might have been lost but she has evolved, to save her self and also document other forgotten elements of history in the process. There are those who speculate that La Sirene is the embodiment of a cross mixed culture, the evolution of Indigenous & African water spirits combined, due to the excess trauma of colonization and so the Mermaid Queen was born. Others will argue that she is the Orisha Yemaya but a newer avatar of her. I hate to argue semantics but I will say this, she exists and her presence is felt to this day, all around the world.

La Sirene is often depicted as a mulatto woman with eyes like the sea but if you have been blessed to see her in dream state, she does appear sometimes as a brown or dark skinned skinned woman of possibly mixed Indigenous/African ancestry with glowing hypnotic eyes. Alot of her older depictions, deal with colorism and slavery, but as things have grown in the modern world this imagery has begun to change. However mermaids, are known for their shapeshifting powers - to truly behold her true form, is a gift reserved for the rare few.

As a keeper of the mysteries, La Sirene also access to many forgotten things in the black subconscious. The element of water is an intensely psychic sign. Water is her domain, and what is the human body 80% of? WATER! The truth does not hide from her hypnotic eyes. This sacred connection to water and her essence, also means you can track forgotten elements black history and connect to other deities/cultures who’ve had contact with her & her whole court or other black water spirits as a whole. So let’s take a short historical trip down memory lane.

The Greeks & Black women. Sirens, Aphrodite, Sibyls and other Children of Water 🧜🏾‍♀️

The deity Aphrodite/Venus is of Grecian and Roman legend.

A little known magikal fact is that Aphrodite/Venus is half siren. She is a child of the water, she was literally birthed this way after Uranus got his balls cut off & thrown into the sea. Much of her Venusian influence and powers of love and beauty come from this element. Now my Mambo doesn’t like mentioning it but Aphrodite, is tolerated by the oceanic court of sirens/mermaids. Any child of water, falls under the domain of the queen. La Sirene has a sort of strange fondness for her and so does Aphrodite for her. However this doesn’t mean they are best friends. It’s tentative friendship at best and comes with some perks. Aphrodite works quickly for children of water sirens and often will send mermaids to her devotees who misbehave. She has deliberately placed me around her people have pissed her off, to cause mischief. She’s quite petty but also very generous. I won’t go as far to dare and say she is in the queen’s court, but she does curry favor with the queen. Being born of water, her half siren/mermaid influence has definitely attributed to legends of her beauty in myth but also her treachery with men 🧜🏾‍♀️😂. She clearly also has some sort of homesickness for the world underneath the water, because many of her offerings are gifts of pearls, kisses, sea shells, beauty products etc. Anyone who serves the Mermaid Queen knows the meaning behind those gifts. If you’re a black gyal with water or siren energy and decide to work with Aphrodite, do it! If you ever irritate her, the least she’ll do is give you pimples and fuck up your skin, she won’t have the full power to completely fuck up your love life like she does with the white girls. And let me tell you, she has completely ruined some white girls lives by giving them terrible lovers or men.

The trident 🔱 is known for its connection in Greek and Hindu cultures. However La Sirene or other African water spirits are depicted carrying it, which is largely ignored in the occult world.

You can track the trident in Hinduism, with the serpent spirits, the nagas or Lord Shiva but let’s focus on it’s Grecian connection. The usage of the trident and Poseidon, even in mainstream society today is associated with him. This lets us know there is a connection between the mermaids, merfolk and La Sirene/African water spirits. Poseidon’s trident was rumored to made in Athens by the Cyclops - this is the city of Athena. So now we can track an element of black history all the way to Poseidon & Athena. Keep that in your thoughts we’ll come back to that later.

Tridents were also used ceremonially in Africa & India as well, as scepters, tribal weapons and religious symbols.

They were also associated with the sea faring people and fishing. It’s highly likely the origins of the trident are cross mixed between these two societies. Indo-African relations, go back to the Bronze age and the Indus Valley civilization. Which means traveling over by sea to reach each other was necessary. There is historical evidence of African millet being found in a Indian city Chanhudaro, including a cemetary or burial ground for African women. Maritime relations between these two groups existed before Grecian & the Egyptian Ptolemaic dynasties.

Now of course there are some deranged historians that will try to whitewash history and say the trident has its origins from the labyrs but the Ancient Greeks & Africans/Indians interacted regularly. The trident also looks nothing like a labyrs, which is quite literally a double sided axe. This is one of the more painful obvious pieces of white washing and historical revisionism.

Regardless, the trident is associated with water, ceremonial/religious purposes, fishing, battling in the coliseum and the symbol of power for a few African, Black diasporian an Hindu deities.

🧜🏾‍♀️ Oracles & Sibyls

Some sibyls/oracles were known to be African prophetesses/Mamissi to the Mami Wata/Sirens in Africa, some were stolen or captured by Greeks or Romans, sold into slavery and made to be oracles, some of whom became quite famous in legend. Their connection to these water spirits, is what gave them their gift of prophecy. Not every sibyl or oracle was African but SOME were. This lead to the sharing and theft of sacred knowledge. It’s likely these women shared this sacred information, with their colleagues, some whom may or may not have been enslaved or kept in these temple and likely this information was traded, for their freedom, power or money etc. This gave way to the usage of sacred spirits and magick being used by men. A great example of this is the snake spirits of the genii, genius spirits (not to be mistaken with genies) and which then evolved into a diluted lesser energy in Greek society being known as daemons (not to be confused with goetic demons) Instead of a woman commanding these specific energies/spirits, the patriarchs decided that these specifics powers were only worthy of being used by men. These spirits were whitewashed, adopted into their religious practices and said to only be given to men at birth. No woman was allowed to possess them anymore.

🧜🏾‍♀️ The whitewashing of Medusa & Lamia.

In mainstream society these two women stories have been white washed but also to hide a very shameful history and narrative. These two were beautiful women, in older stories of black black mythology were known to be black and they were children of water & daughters of the powerful water spirit/snake/siren divine mother/feminine goddess.

Medusa was raped by the GREECIAN GOD OF THE SEA, POSEIDON and Athena covered it up, refused to avenge her and punished her by making her ugly to everyone. It’s speculated in several magikal circles that the snakes in her hair were actually dreads, due to their lack of understanding of black hair and also allegorically might have been a reference to her devotion to the fish or water snake, great mother goddess. A child of the divine feminine, mother goddess was assaulted in a temple by a man and a woman covered it up & celebrated it.

Let’s start there ... cuz this story says a lot! It’s one of the first historical cases in myth that really documents the issues that surround the black feminine specifically and it was intentionally whitewashed. Then to add insult to injury, Athena made her hideous to all men and her chopped off her head and used as a symbol of protection but also a subtle sign of disrespect to the fullest. This still goes on to this day.

In fact ALGOL, the demon star, which is considered to be strongest protective magick talisman in the occult world today is the HEAD OF MEDUSA. The child of water! BITCH! This energy is invoked constantly and the spirit of medusa is never allowed to rest.

However these egregious acts did not come without a price. Athena at time was a goddess of fertility. However desecrating a child of water or the sirens, is seen as an attack by the divine feminine and can will cause people to be afflicted with fertility and other mental health issues as well. This is speculative but it’s also likely that after this they were constantly visited by droughts, floods or repeating issues with water sanitation & purity after this. Lowered fertility rates and miscarriages might be more prominent, for Athenians and Athena devotees & likely continues to this day.

Devotees of Athena may also develop severe issues when it to their mental health because of this connection. They completely lose touch with their feminine energy and become extremely misogynistic after continued work with her.

Not only did Athena, cause Medusa to be seen as hideous throughout the land but she celebrated when she was murdered and proudly wore Medusa’s decapitated head on her shield. From the feminist eye this virgin deity/woman was extremely male identified and adhered to the patriarchal standard. She was tested by the divine feminine and failed.

Even more strange, Athena’s birth allegorically proclaims her essential character: her wisdom is drawn from the head of a male god; the bond of affection between father and daughter; her championship of heroes and male causes, born as she was from the male, and not from a mother’s womb. A dreaded goddess of war, she remained a virgin and a servant of the patriarchal society and remains so to this day. She is the misogynistic cool girl and very asexual at the core. In fact if you explore more of her mythos, it becomes very clear she hates women. I’m bewildered at how she has become associated with lesbians and the feminine at large, when it’s been very clear that she was intent on transcending her gender from the very beginning, but never managed to escape it.

To top it off, I’ll leave you with this quote from Aeschylus’ Oresteia by Athena:

“There is no mother anywhere who gave me birth, and, but for marriage, I am always for the male with all my heart, and strongly on my father’s side. So, in a case where the wife has killed her husband, lord of the house, her death shall not mean most to me.”

Queen Lamia was a said to incredible beauty who seduced Zeus, (a literal man whore) which as made Hera jealous. Hera cursed Lamia with infertility and insomnia. She went insane and is said to have killed her own children and ate them. Zeus is said to be the one who gifted her prophecy and gave her the ability to take out her eyes, so she would not be irritated at the site of other happy mothers.

She became associated with a child eating monster who was half woman and half snake, which ties into the Libyan snake cults. She was associated with phantoms, the shapshifting laimai or empusai and the daemon spirits.

Medusa and Lamia were Libyan by heritage and came from a place in Africa where temples to the water snake mother goddess & divine feminine were common before they were destroyed by invaders intentionally. These women likely had extreme gifts of seduction, mind control and other abilities etc. It’s highly likely that Queen Lamia used her powers of seduction, at the behest of her people to save them from colonization and was demonized for it. Zeus’s temple was in Cyrene in Lybia, so this is far more than an allegorical story. This may be a real life story that was disguised in mythos. Unfortunately deeper research into this subject has turned up many dead ends for me. It’s highly likely Medusa was a priestess of the the matriarchal Mami Watas or water goddess/snake spirits and was likely raped intentionally in Athena’s temple, as a show loyalty to the rising patriarchy by descrating the symbolism of the great mother and the divine feminine. This was likely an attempt to lessen power and status of the matriachal societies that existed at the time. Rape was common war tactic amongst colonizers and news of such disgrace would likely spread like wildfire. This also solidified Athena’s place amongst the male gods and gaining her their respect. Athena and her devotees went a step further to show their allegiance to the patriarchy, by stripping Medusa of her beauty supposedly and exiling her, then parading her decapitated head on shields, when going into battle likely with Libyan enemies.

This is just a brief explanation of a few horrific acts in history, which were whitewashed & explain why the essence of the black feminine has evolved to become more protective, predatory and fierce. She learned to defend herself. Now she kills those who threaten her.

Fun history tip: Usually anytime you see a snake in Grecian mythology, just know something got whitewashed, because the truth was really fucked up, made them look really bad & a black woman was there.

🧜🏾‍♀️ The black feminine is capable of more than you know.

Yes, mermaids/sirens/snakes & the mami watas can be scary at times but that’s what stepping into mysticism of deep waters is like. Water is capable of many things, it is one of the most powerful elements on earth. It can nourish you and kill you, and that’s the beauty of it really.

We should all be grateful the black feminine is so beautiful, fierce & scares the living daylights out of everyone.

You would be dead if it wasn’t.

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robininthelabyrinth · 3 years

Text

Rugrats

- Chapter 3 - ao3 -

After they’d eaten and napped, they headed out, properly equipped and filled up with courage.

“No doubles are gonna get us,” Wen Chao said proudly, waving around his little wooden sword. Lan Zhan had painted talismans for all of them (cleansing talismans, but still!) and they’d all stuck them into the collars of their padded jackets, so everyone was feeling extra safe.

“Definitely not,” Jiang Cheng said, trying out a thrust with his own little sword and over-doing it a bit, but he quickly caught himself before anyone noticed him stumbling around. “We’re gonna be the ones to get them!”

“If we can find them,” A-Xuan pointed out, and that was a good point. “Do we even know where to look?”

“Sure we do!” Wei Ying exclaimed. “Wen Chao’s big brother got taken, right? That means they’ve got to have a nest somewhere nearby.”

“Just like with birds,” Nie Huaisang put in wisely. “If you want to find birds that eat fish, you go look for nests by the river.”

“Do the doubles eat people?” Lan Zhan asked Jiang Cheng in an undertone, looking a little perturbed. “I am uncertain whether my talismans are strong enough to keep people from being…eaten.”

“I dunno,” Jiang Cheng admitted. “But that can’t be right – they want to take your place, don’t they? To switch with you. And if it’s switching, it means both the original and the double have to still exist, or else it’d be stealing not switching – that’s why we have a chance at finding Wen Chao’s original brother again.”

“He was acting pretty nice earlier,” Nie Huaisang said, having clearly eavesdropped on their (not especially quiet) conversation again. Sometimes it was annoying not being able to hold anything against him just because he was the littlest little brother – he’d claimed it was a rule, and Lan Zhan had regretfully not memorized all the rules in his sect so he couldn’t say it wasn’t, even though he’d been suspicious about it, too. “When they were helping us find the jackets and swords. Maybe they haven’t got him all the way yet?”

“They’d better not’ve,” Wen Chao mumbled. “Why does there have to be a nest here, in my house? It’s so unfair.”

“That’s not quite right, though, is it? There’s one in Jinlin Tower, too…”

“I bet they’re probably everywhere. Like pests.”

“What’s a pest?”

“…dunno. Maybe like an insect or something? Oooh, or a beetle!”

“Beetles are the best!” That was Lan Zhan, surprisingly enough, so enthusiastic that he forget even his normal reserve. “I have to dig around all afternoon to find them – my brother keeps releasing my collection by accident…”

“You have a collection?” Jiang Cheng marveled. “Of beetles? My dad doesn’t even let me collect rocks!”

“That’s so cool,” Wei Ying agreed. “Beetles are really cool. You’re so cool, Lan Zhan!”

Lan Zhan ducked his head. “I had a pet spider once,” he admitted, and it automatically made him the coolest person Jiang Cheng had ever met. “It made webs in my window.”

“I don’t have pets,” Wen Chao complained. “I asked once, but my dad had visitors over and they made it weird.”

“How so?”

“Well, you know…”

What they knew was not explained, largely on account of Nie Huaisang interrupting to ask: “Hey, Wen-xiong, didn’t you say you and your brother were the only kids here?”

“In the main house, yeah, we are,” Wen Chao replied, looking puzzled. “Why?”

“Because I just saw some.”

“Doubles!” A-Xuan gasped.

Jiang Cheng raised his wooden sword with confidence – with this many of them, they were bound to defeat the bad guys. “Let’s get ‘em!”

“You idiots!” Wen Chao hissed. “These are my cousins!”

“Sorry about that,” Nie Huaisang said apologetically. He had an extremely thick face and didn’t mind apologizing – or crying, or whining, or anything, really, as long as it meant he got his way in the end. “we thought you were evil monsters.”

“I’ve n-never been m-mistaken for a m-monster before,” the little boy who Wen Chao had introduced as Wen Ning said. He seemed to think it was pretty neat, which Jiang Cheng could understand.

He’d never gotten mistaken for a monster.

…well, he was still young. One day, when he was all grown up, he’d be the scariest.

“I don’t want to know,” his older sister said. She looked cross, and also like she was about the same age as Jiang Yanli, though much less friendly – her name was Wen Qing, apparently. “Don’t tell me, because I don’t want to know. This whole thing sounds like the introduction to a bad joke: a Wen, a Nie, a Jiang, a Lan, a Jin, and – some kid – ”

“I’m Wei Ying!”

“ – and some kid are running through the halls of the Nightless City completely unsupervised? Ridiculous.” She snorted. “I don’t want to even consider what sort of trouble leaving you alone would cause! You should be sitting quietly somewhere, keeping out of the way –”

Wen Qing was definitely not going to be helping with the doubles hunt, Jiang Cheng decided, and glanced at all the others, who seemed to be in agreement.

Then they all unanimously turned to look at Nie Huaisang, because while Wen Qing might be Wen Chao’s cousin, it was pretty clear that Nie Huaisang was the one who was best at managing older kids.

“Our older siblings are over at the room in the end of the hall,” Nie Huaisang told her, his eyes somehow seeming even bigger and more adorable than normal. “I think Wen-da-ge was saying something about teaching them a lesson, I don’t know what he was talking about…”

“A lesson?” Wen Qing looked alarmed. “Those are the sect heirs! He’d better not – oh, A-Ning, you stay here with the other children. I’ll be right back…”

She strode off with a determined expression on her face.

“Wow,” Wei Ying said. “That worked really well.”

Nie Huaisang preened.

“I don’t remember my big brother saying anything about lessons,” Wen Chao said, sounding puzzled.

“He didn’t,” Nie Huaisang told him. “But it got her to leave us alone, didn’t it?”

“Do not tell lies is a rule,” Lan Zhan told him sternly.

“It wasn’t a lie. I said I thought Wen-da-ge was saying something like that, I didn’t say he actually said it – I’m entitled to think whatever thoughts I want!”

Lan Zhan didn’t look convinced.

“Look at it this way, Lan Zhan,” Jiang Cheng said practically. “Would you really be willing to sit in a room out of the way instead of night-hunting?”

Lan Zhan still looked mulish, but he shook his head, conceding the point.

“You’re n-night-hunting?” Wen Ning said, sounding fascinated. “I’ve never been night-hunting!”

Interestingly, his stutter seemed to decrease as he got excited. Jiang Cheng wondered why that was – maybe he was just nervous around new people.

“That’s right,” Jiang Cheng told him proudly. “Tell me, have you ever seen – doubles?”

“Seeing double?” Wen Ning asked, scratching his nose. “Uh, yeah, I guess so? Sometimes when I get really dizzy, I see double…”

“I don’t think running around in circles is going to help us find the doubles,” A-Xuan said dubiously. “I just got really dizzy, and I still didn’t see anything.”

“Yeah, me either,” Nie Huaisang said. He was lying on his back on the ground and moaning a little. “Maybe we need a new plan.”

“I think our original plan was better,” Jiang Cheng agreed. He was still a bit dizzy, too. “Their nest has gotta be somewhere near Wen-da-ge’s room, right? If they’re planning on swapping him out?”

“Maybe he’s tied up in there,” Wei Ying said. He was a little bit of a ghoul, Jiang Cheng had discovered. “Locked away for the skinning.”

“He’s not!” Wen Chao exclaimed, sitting up in his fury and turning a little green from having moved too quickly so soon after all that running. “You take that back!”

“If he is locked up somewhere, we’ll find him before anything bad happens to him,” Nie Huaisang intervened. “Wei-xiong, don’t be mean, okay? That’s his big brother you’re talking about.”

“…oh. Sorry. I didn’t mean it.”

Wen Chao sniffled a little, pressing his lips together to keep from crying. “You’d better be sorry.”

Jiang Cheng rolled over to look at him. “Wen Chao, I’ve got a question for you,” he said. “It’s kind of a dumb question, and you might get angry if I ask it, but I don’t actually mean it as being mean or nothing. I just really wanna know.”

As anyone might’ve expected, that got everyone’s attention onto him and off the previous subject, as well as off their still slightly uneasy stomachs. Even Lan Zhan tilted his head in such a way that suggested he was interested in hearing it without actually giving anything away.

Wen Chao looked suspicious, probably rightfully. “Uh-huh,” he said, eyes narrow. “What’s the question?”

“Uh,” Jiang Cheng said, feeling a touch awkward. “Okay, so, my mom taught me that when someone says ‘sorry’, you’re supposed to say ‘that’s all right’ or ‘you’re forgiven’ or ‘think nothing of it’ or something like that.”

“…yeah?”

“Well, every time anyone says ‘sorry’ to you, you say ‘you better be’, so I was wondering if that was a Wen sect thing or a –”

Wen Ning started giggling. “It’s not a Wen sect thing,” he said, his eyes curved until they were nearly slits. “Not Dafan Wen, anyway. Maybe it’s a main clan thing? Are there special main clan things?”

“My ribbon’s a special main clan thing,” Lan Zhan said.

“It is not,” A-Xuan said. “All Lan sect people have ribbons!”

“Not with clouds.” Lan Zhan was pouting. “Only main clan can have clouds on their ribbons.”

“That’s just a design, though, isn’t it? Like – fashion.”

“It is not!”

“We have special clarity bells,” Jiang Cheng interrupted, waving his own. “Everyone else’s normal, but ours are special!”

“Wait, does everyone get cool main clan only stuff?” Wen Chao wondered. “Why don’t I get cool main clan stuff?”

“I don’t!” Wei Ying volunteered.

“You’re not even from a clan! Or a sect!”

“Oh. Right. Oops. Got over-excited for a second there.”

“Uh, hey…” Wen Ning said, coughing a little.

“I don’t think we get anything special for being main clan people,” Nie Huaisang mused. He’d turned over to lie on his stomach, so he put his chin on his hands and was kicking his feet in the air. “Do we get something special? Except maybe more spending money? We should get something special. Like…I don’t know. A special pin.”

“A pin?” Wen Chao scoffed. “That’s not special!”

“Why not? It could be!”

“Uh-uh.”

“Uh-huh!”

“…excuse me, please…”

“Hey, Wen Chao never even answered my question,” Jiang Cheng complained. “Can we get back to that?”

“Maybe I don’t want to answer your stupid question!”

“Hey! My question’s not stupid!”

“Excuse me…!”

“Yeah? Well maybe you’re stupid!”

“Why you – Lan Zhan! Bite him for me!”

“Don’t you dare, you stuck up bedsheet –”

“Will you all SHUT UP AND LISTEN TO ME?” Wen Ning yelled.

“…and that’s why you have to bring along snacks when you go on adventures,” Wen Ning finished his explanation. “Because if you don’t, you get hungry, and when you get hungry, you get angry.”

He’d brought enough peanuts to share.

They really did feel better after eating them, too.

“I thought it’d be okay because we had jiejie’s soup,” Jiang Cheng muttered, shamefaced. His mother had reminded him to eat plenty of snacks as well, right before he got sent here, and his mother never said anything extraneous. “I didn’t realize we’d get hungry again so quick.”

“You had a whole nap in between,” Wen Ning told him. “Napping uses a lot of energy, and running uses even more. Once you burn the energy, you need to replace it with food.”

“You know lots of neat stuff,” Wei Ying told him, and Wen Ning turned red. “Also, you’ve got great lungs.”

Wen Ning turned even more red, somehow. “….I didn’t mean to shout…”

“You did,” Lan Zhan said. He was pouting. Maybe because Wei Ying was paying attention to someone else for once. “A lot.”

“…I’m not supposed to shout…”

“Is there anything you are supposed to do?” Jiang Cheng asked. Thus far it’d mostly sounded like Wen Ning wasn’t allowed to do very much at all.

“Uh. Study medicine, I guess?”

“Ooooooh,” Nie Huaisang said. “You’re our healer! That makes you important!”

Wen Ning stared. “…no one’s ever said I was important before.”

“That’s why you’ve gotta listen to me,” Nie Huaisang said happily. “My da-ge says that everyone’s important for some reason, and also that everyone’s good at something, even if it’s hard to figure out what it is exactly. And whenever people try to make fun of me for not being good at something, he hits them right in the face even though he gets punished for it, so you know he’s right!”

Jiang Cheng wasn’t sure that was how that worked, but it sounded pretty impressive.

“Well, as our healer, do you think we’re okay to keep going?” A-Xuan asked, and stuck out his hand. “You can feel my pulse if you want to check.”

“Uh, no. I’m sure it’s fine…you all look less angry now, anyway. You shouldn’t be too angry, it’s not good for you.”

“I don’t think that’s right,” Nie Huaisang said.

“I’m pretty sure that’s not right,” Jiang Cheng agreed, thinking of his mom.

“Anyway, let’s go find Wen Chao’s brother’s room,” he added, getting up himself. “Before we can meet any more obstacles!”

“Uh,” Wen Chao said, following along as they made their way down the hallway that he’d indicated to them earlier as being the right one. “About that…there might be one more obstacle in our path…”

“Really?” Wei Ying asked. He was right behind Jiang Cheng, who was out in front. “What obstacle?”

“Well…you see…”

Jiang Cheng tugged open the door.

Unexpectedly, something huge and dark leaped out, heading right for them.

He screamed.

They all screamed.

“I’ve decided I like your big brother,” Jiang Cheng said to Wen Chao, who was scowling. “When he’s not double-i-fied, he’s got good taste. No, great taste. Amazing taste.”

“It’s just a dog,” Wen Chao grumbled.

“It’s the fuzziest, most wonderful dog,” Jiang Cheng said, trying to cuddle it. “I want to ride it like a horse.”

The dog that guarded Wen Xu’s room might even be large enough for that, being all big boned and tall, with a thick jaw and heavy teeth that looked good for crushing things – but also the most adorably dumb-looking little doggy smile that made Jiang Cheng’s heart melt the second he saw it.

“I’m impressed you managed to tame it,” Nie Huaisang said. He was hiding back next to Wen Chao. Next to most of the others, actually – apparently Jiang Cheng was the only dog-crazy one, although A-Xuan had also eventually come over to pet the dog as well. “It’s so…large.”

“I’ve got three dogs of my own,” Jiang Cheng boasted. “Back at home. They know all the commands! Like sit, and stay, and find master –”

The dog gave a bark and got up from where it was sitting and happily receiving pets, then started trotting down the hallway.

Jiang Cheng stared.

They all stared.

“Wait,” Wei Ying said. “Is the dog going to find Wen Chao’s big brother? I mean – maybe – the real one?”

“It must be! Chase it!”

They chased it.

Unfortunately, the dog only led them back to the same main hall that they’d been next to before, the one where Wen Ruohan kept his throne and accepted audiences. They’d already looked there, and there hadn’t been any sign of doubles there at all – and this time the door was shut and locked with a great big bar on it, blocking everything.

The sound of faint voices echoed out from inside.

“Is that my mom?” Wei Ying asked, pressing his ear to the door. “It kinda sounds like my mom, yelling. But not quite…”

“I think that might be my mom, yelling,” Jiang Cheng said, his ear equally positioned. “But she’s back at the Lotus Pier, isn’t she?”

“Maybe she came to pick you up…?”

“If she could’ve come to pick me up, she wouldn’t have sent me in the first place,” Jiang Cheng pointed out. “Either me or jiejie.”

There was a deeper sound, almost like a thrumming, or maybe like a mudslide.

“That might be my dad,” Nie Huaisang said frowning. “It kind of sounds like my dad, though; no one can yell the way he can when he gets angry, not even da-ge. I can’t tell through this stupid door, though. Wen-xiong, where’s the back entrance?”

“What are you talking about?”

“The back entrance,” Nie Huaisang said, and rolled his eyes. “There’s always a back entrance! That’s how people can escape if they’re stuck!”

Wen Chao blinked at him.

“He’s right,” Lan Zhan said, unexpectedly. “We have a back entrance, too, back home – a secret one. My shufu showed it to me so that I’d know about it in case of a crisis.”

“Lan Zhan,” Wei Ying said. “You are so cool.”

Lan Zhan made a small meeping sound and covered his face with his hands. His ears were red again.

“…I think we do, too,” A-Xuan said. “We’ve got so many entrances I don’t know which one would be the ‘back’ entrance, but we’ve definitely got more than one way in or out to the main rooms. It’d be dangerous not to, wouldn’t it? If there was only one way in, you might get stuck.”

“See?” Nie Huaisang exclaimed. “There’s always a back entrance! Always! Isn’t that right, Jiang-xiong?”

Jiang Cheng scratched his nose, feeling slightly embarrassed since he didn’t think he knew what the back entrance at home was, though it sounded pretty plausible and he didn’t want to feel left out. “I think our back entrance back home is jumping out of a window and swimming away,” he temporized. “But there’s still another way in and out, yeah. I mean, what if there’s a fire or a flood?”

Wen Chao was turning red, and not in a happy way. “Well, there’s no back entrance here, okay?” he said, glaring. “None at all!”

“There’s got to be! Maybe you just don’t know about it –”

“Wen Chao couldn’t tell you about it even if he did know about it,” Wen Ning interjected. “He’s gotta keep the sect secrets. Isn’t that right?”

“…yeah. That’s right. That’s right!”

Jiang Cheng was pretty sure Wen Chao was just trying to save face.

“Well, it wouldn’t be giving away the secret if we guessed it, right?” Wei Ying said, lacing his hands behind his head as if he were trying to look cool, which he wasn’t. Well, maybe a bit. Wei Ying was intrinsically cool in a way Jiang Cheng was a little jealous of, and was going to get Wei Ying to teach him right away when they were done. “That wouldn’t be you telling us, just something we worked out. We can all try to figure out where the back entrance is, like a mystery, and if we find that, maybe we can find our way inside!”

“I mean…I guess that makes sense…but wait. Why do we even want to go inside?” Wen Chao asked, though he looked halfway to being convinced. “There’s nothing in there related to the doubles. It’s just my dad, and maybe your parents.”

Wen Ning raised a hand. “Do doubles just affect kids?” he asked, and they all turned to look at him. “I mean, we know there’s a doubles nest around here, right? And we’re worried about it getting your siblings…can it get your parents?”

“No way,” Jiang Cheng said at once. “My mom’s a great cultivator, no one would ever be able to beat her!”

“No one in the world can beat my dad,” Wen Chao scoffed. “He’s my dad.”

“I would know if my shufu was replaced,” Lan Zhan said firmly.

They looked at the others.

A-Xuan looked uncertain, which was fair, but Nie Huaisang was frowning. “Well,” he said. “I’d normally say the same because my dad’s super strong, but…well…I mean, if it were me…”

“What is it?” Lan Zhan asked, and he looked a little anxious. And if even Lan Zhan looked anxious…

“Well, I’m just saying, if the doubles were smart, and wanted to gather all the important grown-ups in one place all at once…”

Jiang Cheng’s stomach dropped.

“We’ve got to find the back entrance,” Wei Ying said, now looking worried himself. “We’ve gotta. My parents are there, too, and my mom is already doomed – she’s gotta be really careful!”

“We’ll figure it out,” Jiang Cheng announced, trying very hard to be brave. “Don’t worry. We’ll save them!”

#mdzs #jiang cheng #nie huaisang #lan wangji #wei wuxian #jin zixuan #wen chao #wen qing #wen ning #my fic #my fics #rugrats

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thatringboy · 3 years

Note

Hey I'd love to read a fanfic bout Percy comforting Annabeth when she's on her period and has horrible

both of my sisters and i get very bad cramps so this was very cathartic to write

Thank You

Warnings: Taking medicine pills

Characters: Percy Jackson, Katie Gardner, Malcolm Pace, Annabeth Chase

Ships: Percabeth

Word Count: 969

Summary: Percy takes care of Annabeth when her period cramps leave her immobile

Percy stood to the side awkwardly as Katie moved briskly around the camp store, tossing things into his basket.

“I thought girls needed ice cream and chocolate for this stuff, not… whatever all this stuff is.” He rummaged through the basket.

Katie gave him an evil look. “Do you know what goes on in a woman’s body during her period?”

Percy blinked twice and stopped to think. “Well, her abdomen hurts for a few days and she can’t go swimming. Also, her mood gets bad.”

The daughter of Demeter rolled her eyes. “That, and we lose a lot of body fluids, so yes to all of those water bottles. And we need a heating pad to help with her cramps which can sometimes leave us immobile and I’m not sure if she prefers pads or tampons so we’re getting both.”

He followed behind her as she moved to the registar where a young son of Hermes stood waiting for them. “Thanks for the help, it means a lot.”

She gave him a smile and took the basket from him. “No problem, my periods get super bad too, so I’m more than happy to help Annabeth out. I also recommend getting her some snacks, but not too many or she’ll feel bloated.”

Percy shook his head. “And this happens every month?”

“Until we’re in our fifties.”

“I’m never underestimating you girls again. Not that I did to begin with, but now even moreso.”

Katie snorted and pulled out a handful of drachmas out of her pocket to pay for the supplies.

The son of Poseidon grabbed his things and left the store, walking briskly back to the Athena cabin where Malcolm sat on the steps waiting for him.

“Oh good, there you are. I wasn’t sure what to do, so I had Slingshot Derek go look for you, but now you’re here. I’ll go find them later.”

Percy held up his bags. “How’s she doing?”

Malcolm rubbed the back of his neck. “Well, she’s not crying, but she hasn’t been able to move from her bunk for a while.”

The older boy nodded and stepped inside the cabin, not really worrying about the rules saying that he couldn’t go in. Annabeth was sitting on her bunk, eyes squeezed shut and her hands bunching up the hem of her shirt. She didn’t notice her boyfriend had appeared until he sat himself down on the bed next to her and began pulling out the heating pad Katie had bought.

“Hey there, Wise Girl.”

Her eyes flew open and she grabbed the heating pad. “Yes, thank you! I lent mine out to Laurel and she never gave it back. What else did you get?”

Percy dumped out the bag next to her while she moved to plug in the heating pad and turned it up on “high”. “Eh, Katie and I got you some extra water, supplies, she threw in some protein bars that are chocolate and mint flavored, a bottle of ibuprofen and I think that’s about it.”

Annabeth kissed him on the cheek and settled herself back down on the bed, the heating pad pressed to her abdomen. “Life savers, both of you. Could you get me three ibuprofens?”

He did a double take. “Three?!”

Her grey eyes pierced his soul and her eyebrows furrowed deeply. “Did I stutter, Seaweed Brain?”

Percy quickly uncapped the bottle of medicine and fished out three tiny red pills. He slid them into Annabeth’s hand and got her a water bottle as well. She downed the painkillers and chugged half the bottle before nestling into her pillow and sighing.

“Thanks again. I think I’m going to have to miss Capture the Flag this week.”

He stroked her hair softly. “Don’t worry. It’ll give Malcolm a chance to be the strategist this time.”

Annabeth hummed and leaned into his touch. Her face scrunched up in pain for a few seconds before she pressed the heating pad tighter and her features went back to normal. “Sorry…”

“For what?”

“For being a burden. Usually I get over the cramps and carry on like they never happened, but this time they’re worse. It’s frustrating to not be able to do anything.”

Percy rolled his eyes and laid down next to her, putting his arm behind her head and letting her cuddle up next to him. “Eh, you’re not a burden to anyone. Everyone here at camp would gladly drop everything to help you. Well, maybe not Sherman but literally everyone else. Besides, this gets me out of archery practice.”

She dug her elbow into his gut. “Wow, so I’m just an excuse to get out of training? Is that what I am to you?”

He planted a number of kisses into her hair. “No-o-o-o~, I yove you, Wise Girl!”

Annabeth giggled and let out a content sigh. “Thank you.”

“If you say ‘thank you’ one more time then I’m gonna lose it.”

She turned her head to face him, snuggling up into him more. “Oh? Really? Thank you, Perseus Jackson.”

Percy sighed and leaned closer to her. “Hmm, guess I’m gonna have’ta shut you up.”

“I suppose so.” She brushed a kiss against his lips with a smile. It only lasted for a few seconds before the cramps came back and she pulled away, but Percy only scooted closer to her with a loving look.

“I’ve got you. We’ll get through this like we’ve gotten through everything else. What could possibly be worse than our adventures?”

Annabeth groaned and pulled her knees up. “This.”

“Then I’ll stay here until you’re all better.”

It was such a simple phrase that he tossed around, but it always made Annabeth’s heart swell with love. “Thank you.”

He flicked the top of her head. “What did I just say about the ‘thank yous’?!”

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slashingdisneypasta · 3 years

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Hello. What about a villain SO who adores animals for Captain Hook, Hades, Dr. Facilier, Bill Cipher, Beetlejuice, and Jafar? Thank you hun😊🍯

Hope you like these ^^

~~~

Beetlejuice:

· I wouldn’t put it past him to make one or two beastiality jokes…

· But apart from that, he doesn’t half mind animals either! (And he finds it endearing to see you playing with them, not that he cares to identify at all the warm, soothing feeling in his chest when he sees you boop your nose against a tortoise’s.) He’d love a dog, or… a tiger. A dinosaur would be ideal.

· But actually, its animals that tend to have a problem with him.

· Cuz of course animals are a lot more sensitive than humans tend to be to ghosts, and demons, and souls. And his soul is pretty damn mucky. BJ has met exactly zero animal’s so far (Since his death) that haven’t taken an immediate dislike of him. They hiss at him, or growl, or try to wriggle away even if they aren’t being held by him; Just nearby to him.

· He scares them because they can feel his evil and want nothing to do with it.

· So your dreams of adopting a dog with your new ghostie bf will need to be put on a back burner. Maybe he can lasso a sandworm and y’all can name her Rose and she can be your pet? He absolutely does not want you to be sad because of him!!

Bill Cipher:

· “ooOOH, what kind? Anglerfish? Clown fish? Sharks? Lobsters? Giant Squid? Wolffish? The Textile Cone Snail’s native to the Red Sea, Indian Ocean and Oceania waters? Octopus? Lock Ness Monster? Mermaids? Shrimp? Koi? M E G A L A D O N S? OH OH- THE KRAKEN?”

· “Wow, that was a lotta underwater stuff. I mean, yeah, they’re all great but also land animals and birds… And I don’t think all those are actually real?”

· “Heheh, that’s what you think… “His body loses its colour and becomes like a Bill Shaped screen, like he does sometimes when he’s brainstorming, and you just catch a picture of somewhere under the ocean and a beautiful, purple tale flapping out of the picture and a flash of soft, human skin just above it. Your eyes blow wide open. “Y/N, remember 80 percent of the ocean is unexplored.”

· SO, yeah. Bill’s really into underwater creatures. It is the most mysterious part of earth and in it lives some of the world’s freakiest creatures.

· He’ll install a whole aquarium in your house out of excitement, and inside? Nothing but angler fish, giant squids to watch you while you sleep and beautifully coloured sea snails climbing up the glass walls.

· Land animals though and birds? Very little interest. Birds get points only for being close to dinosaurs (You ask about reptiles in that case and his eye inverts in its colouring. His ‘skin’ goes red. “Those jerks know what they did.”), but still he’d much rather talk about star fish! Get ready to be more educated about the ocean’s weirdest creatures and mysterious happenings then you ever wanted to be.

Captain Hook:

· He has very confused feelings about this- especially when you act so chummy with Tik Tok who, naturally, loves you and your T-Bone steak snacks.

· On one hand, if you’re feeding Tik Tok then Tik Tok probably won’t feel the need or be able, to eat him.

· But on the other- bEtrAyER! How could you feed and love that monster, that has plagued his life for years and made his existence a living hell?

· But then again, the fact that Tik Tok is now often too full to bother with him rears its head again and he calms down.

· Because of this, its typical that he says nothing when you have animals around (Any animal. They all remind him of Tik Tok. Scales, fur, or feather). He’ll want to. Gosh, the need to speak will overflow in his throat and he’ll take a deep breath- … but then no words come out. He forces it down. Because he can’t mention his dislike without mentioning his relief also, so speaking at all would really just make you confused and feel bad and leave him frustrated because he doesn’t know how either of you could change to make this better for anyone, so its just not worth it.

· So then he just walks away.

· Its pretty humorous to see, actually. Because he’s just all grumpy and slouching off, maybe shaking his head and muttering, and you’re all wide eyed and confused. Holding, like, a budgie or a snake or something.

· The other pirates are keeping a tally.

· Bonus point: He’s not scared (Or allergic) of any other animals apart from Tik Tok, so you don’t have to worry about him being skittish or anything.

Dr Facilier:

· Frogs are a difficult subject for him so enjoy amphibian cuties somewhere that he is not, please. Also rabbits- there was an incident before you came along that he does not speak of.

· Other then that, Facilier is basically a normal person about animals. He can appreciate a nice zoo visit every now and then and pet the odd dog or cat but with you in his life he never wants to go to a zoo again. And he’s bored as hell by everyday pets.

· But he won’t tell you he’s sick of all the animals. Nay, nay. Its one of those things where you love the person, so you put up with the crazy/annoying shit they love. Like ‘Yes, yes. Very interesting, cher… ‘ when you talk about it, while he’s actually reading the newspaper and he hasn’t heard anything you said. After all, you stay quiet when he’s plotting or cackling over something he did to a victim that day. Its only fair.

· He is fascinated, though, when he’s just watching you (Sometimes he just sits back and observes you doing your thing. Its relaxing for him) and he notices little quirks you’ve picked up from various creatures. Like the way you curl up when you’re lying down on the couch and how you shrink back from things that happened to surprise you, similar to a big cat. Your eyes are focused like a wild animal, too. Very cute.

· Lots of animal-themed nicknames.

Hades:

· “You know, some tell me I’m a kinda animal, babe… “He wiggles his eyebrows at you over his mug of whatever-he-drinks (You fear asking, after watching him eat a bowl of worms), offering his best (And funniest) bedroom eyes to you.

· “Yes, but are you as cute as this snake Hades?? Are you?? Look into these eyes and tell me this snek is not as cute as you are.” You lift the little grass snake gently from the table and onto your arm, letting him wrap its body around you and lift his head to look around; Checking out what’s up. He was getting his scales stroked good; Why has it stopped?

· “Pfft,” Hades rolls his eyes, returning to the chess board in front of him (He likes to play both sides and challenge himself).

· Okay so, Hades can take or leave most animals. But it’s so cute that you love them, so he lets you keep them around. Whatever animals you like (Don’t worry, you also have the proper equipment and enclosures for them, and Hades makes another God, who is an expert on all things animals, come by whenever you have a question), and however many you like. I mean, what’s the good of being a God if you can’t spoil yourself and your preciously excited, human significant other?

· So you have, like, Reptiles at the west end of his underworld castle, nocturnal animals on the east, more pet-type animals like dogs and cats and rabbits in the living area part of the castle, etc.

· The animals give Pain and Panic a hugely hard time, which Hades thinks is a great bonus to doing this for you.

· He really loves it when you call him and yourself the animal’s parents. Yes, call me Daddy, babes. Its fine by me!

Jafar:

· Oh my god, the disdain in his voice when he looks from you, practically bouncing on the heels of your feet and to the fluffy white kitty you’ve gently shoved in his hands- which he holds at nearly a full arm’s length away from him. “Eugh. Really?”

· “What’s wrong! ? Isn’t she the cutest?”

· “She’ll get fur everywhere.”

· “Oh, that’s rich… “You say, side eye-ing Iago, who’s making a face at the cat from Jafar’s other shoulder. “Iago stress moults- and you stress him out all the time!”

· A dramatic, offended gasp erupts from one of the two males (Not gonna tell you who). “It is aesthetically pleasing mess!”

· So basically if the animal doesn’t speak a language he understands, he doesn’t care for it. You’re going to be fighting him on this for the rest of your life, Y/N. (Or his. I mean, I heard evil double crossing sorcerer vizier’s are dying at an accelerated rate these days. Hm, mysterious.).

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script-a-world · 2 years

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The Drow (Ask Submission)

So…I have decided to worldbuild a type of organism which uses seismic energy to produce sugars and is an autotrophe producing oxygen and requires salt to survive. This allowed many cave systems to develop rich ecosystems. There are also Drows, in my verse, which are quite different from the “normal” drows you’ll find in D and D. These dark elves believe it is their devine mission to protect those salt depots, which allows the cave ecosystem to survive. Said drows tolerate sunlight very poorly, and thus are dependent as an ethnic group on those salt depots, and mining them would double as both an ecological catastrophe and a genocide. Elves, because of their magical abilities, are a far less destructive species than humans. The drows specifically have a cultural taboo against eating things conserved in salt and only royalty would be permitted to consume lactic acid conserved foods, and only a table spoon’s worth per year.

The city they built is quite special, with all buildings made to surround and avoid salt depots and have enough infra structure. They are fairly technologically advanced in water collecting and fungiculture, allowing them to have a rather regular supply of food, with a technology level similar to one would find in the XVII century. (By the way, in this verse, elves are fungivores but cannot digest starch, but can fly after puberty).

Because of their very specific life-style and needs, this group would become a frequent target for persecution and eventually became hidden from the world? Also, how big of an impact on their culture would be the risk of extermination if discovered (sure, elves are overpowered, but they are less numerous than humans) be?

Also, if a catastrophe would force them to re-enter the eye of other groups, how would they survive as a group?

Tex: I’m already hooked by the idea of autotrophic halophiles, and curious as to the circumstances that would allow any organism that relies upon seismic activity to… synthesize? Sugars? Within a cave system. Would the latter be working off of a model like how humans synthesize vitamin D in their own bodies using solar radiation as a catalyst, or some other method? I do also wonder about the general geological mechanics of a cave being able to withstand enough seismic activity for organisms to develop a biological reaction that depends upon it without causing the cave(s) to collapse - what type of caves are these, and what do their surrounding features look like?

I did a quick google on drow, as D&D isn’t my area of expertise, and I’m curious as to how your drow’s relationship to what would traditionally be a component of “light” magic (i.e. the salt) has diverged from what I’m assuming is a typecast within D&D lore (e.g. evil-aligned creatures cannot interact beneficially with virtue-aligned spells/spell-casting components).

As you’ve set up parameters already on a very low-salt diet, how does this impact their physiology, to make your drow able to metabolize and balance energy consumption needs with a comparatively lower amount of salts? Do they get this from a different source, such as a unique type of fungus that leaches salt from the walls, or from fish, or something else? These sodium ion channels (Wikipedia) are of particular importance in the brain, which makes me curious as to whether their metabolism is slowed way down to make up for the little amount consumed from their environment, or they have alternate pathways in their cells to accomplish the same function in order to maintain the same level of metabolism.

If their diets are also restricted from starch, then their carbohydrate requirements are also going to be vastly different, or else they have a very, very different metabolism pathway that doesn’t use broken-down glucose (or their source for glucose might look strange to a human’s perspective).

To add to the mix, if they are as deeply subterranean as their inspiration from D&D, then they would be deeply un-adapted to sunlight, and possibly to fatal levels if in combination with the previous two metabolic considerations.

Providing that these three points are simultaneously true, then they would be inherently restricted to a subterranean environment and would physically be unable to venture into any area that differs so drastically as aboveground would.

In that respect, I think your drow would be naturally endangered, due mostly to the fact that they would have an exceptionally difficult time finding physical or cultural commonalities with non-drow, and their environment would be likewise uninhabitable to outsiders. Should anyone discover them, a less intrepid soul would likely react out of fear (i.e. the “kill it with fire” approach), and the angle of first contact would interpret the degree of devastation.

I don’t know if you mean socially or physically with “re-enter the eye of other groups”, as the former can be done more or less remotely (trade routes, letters, literature, music, etc), whereas the latter would require them to leave a domain they are exceptionally well-adapted to and venture into one that might be physically dangerous for them to exist in (for a comparison, if humans had a walkable path to the moon, they still might not, as the moon is unsuited to human physiology).

If in the latter case, your drow would need to recreate their cave system to survive, and - provided the subject is approached delicately and with tact - they could well coexist on the same proverbial square of land, albeit as one/more groups “topside” and them “below-ground”. It would certainly look interest to have a mega-city like that, with liminal spaces where both groups could mingle with little harm to themselves.

#subyss-chan #pylons #drow

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princessphilly · 3 years

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Word Count: 1975 (you know I start small then build up)

Tag list: @newlibrary , @luvsherleafs @spine-buster , @m00nlightdelights @lovethepreds @myhockeyworld87 @Defiant-mouse, @callllumhood @yzas-stuff , @stars-canucks @laurenairay @cutiesara23, @besthockeyfics @hockeyallthetime @tazerass , @markymarkstrom @letsgobaby, @himbos-on-ice @hockeywocs @bloodthedevil @nhlboyshavemyhart88 @whatishockey @dreamer1430 @shelbsatans

CW: people failing to be mean, some angst. We are still rated pg-13 but we will be hitting NC-17 soon.

Add me to the tag list!

It’s okay to admit that you are enough. It’s also okay to struggle with admitting that to yourself. At least, that’s what I learned when Meghan Markle still had her old blog, The Tig, up online before she became the Duchess of Sussex. Honestly, she’s one of my goals; her father is a trip and she’s managed to live well despite his issues. I’d like to be able to do whatever she did with my mom. - journal 9/2

“The man over there says thanks.”

Jamila looked at the waiter, confused. “Um, okay,” she questioned as she looked where the waiter was discreetly pointing. A tall, brown haired guy raised a whiskey neat in salute. Jamila gave him a tentative grin. After the waiter left, she hissed, “I didn’t send him a drink, Lisa! What the hell?”

Jamila had to admit he was attractive but not her usual type. Her type was the outdoorsy type, the kind who could fish, hunt, and actually be able to live off the land if society collapsed overnight. This guy… he looked like money and power, the kind to hire someone to take care of him.

After a moment, it became obvious what happened as Alyssa and Frances came back over. Jamila put on her best movie-star fake smile as those two came by. They were the worst kind of people; backstabbers who even when they got caught, still got away with it because they knew how to suck up to the people in power. Jamila knew exactly why they didn’t like her: she had enough fame left over that she didn’t need to be their friend to earn a good reputation in their phD program.

“Meet any nice guys,” Frances asked with a sly smirk on her face.

Jamila gave Lisa a sideways look as Alyssa said, “I mean, there’s Jonathan Toews, he’s single. I bet he’d be interested in a washed-up actress.”

“Hmmm, I have no idea who you are talking about,” Jamila honestly said.

Alyssa smirked as she replied, “He plays for the Blackhawks, Meena.”

Jamila grit her teeth as Alyssa used her first name. She hated when people used her first name, it brought up too many bad memories. Before she could reply, the attractive brown-haired guy was standing next to her with a faint grin on his face. “Um, hi,” Jamila said as Lisa, Alyssa, and Frances stared at him.

“I figured I’d say hi after you sent me that drink. I would have bought you one but I don’t know what you’re drinking and it wouldn’t be nice to assume. My name is Jonathan,” he said with a flirtatious wink.

Jamila hesitantly replied, “My name is Jamila and I’m just drinking merlot tonight.”

“Another glass,” Jonathan asked, his deep voice doing things to Jamila’s insides. She bit her lip as she looked at him, trying to decide if she wanted to encourage him or not.

“Sure.”

As he found a waiter, Jamila looked at Lisa. Lisa motioned to her phone and Jamila checked her screen. That’s jonathan toews, the guy those bitches were talking about. He plays hockey and is the captain of the blackhawks

Jamila texted back, what is hockey n y should i care

Then the waiter came with a fresh glass of merlot and Jonathan passed it to her. Jamila took a deep sip, loving the taste. Merlot was truly her favorite and they had a good house vintage. Jonathan asked, “Are you new to Chicago?”

“I’ve been here for a year. It’s alright,” Jamila replied. “This is my first time going out on the North Side though.”

Jonathan gave Jamila a slow smile and her breath caught. He definitely was attractive but not her usual type. He said, “Then that’s why we’ve never met til now. I would have definitely remembered such a beautiful woman if I saw you before.”

Jamila giggled. “That’s a good one. You get one point for that.”

“Just one point? Is it an assist or a goal?”

“Um,” Jamila stalled. “I have no idea what you are talking about.”

The sly smile on Jonathan’s face turned into a wide smile. This girl was not only hot but he could tell that she was truly clueless about hockey. Tonight was a win-win for him. “I’m going to assume it’s a goal then.”

“Okay.” Jamila shrugged as she took another sip of her wine. “I’m still not completely impressed so you still need to work on it.”

Jonathan laughed, causing some people to turn towards them. Jamila caught Alyssa and Frances giving her the evil eye and she smirked. Reaching out a hand, she touched Jonathan’s upper arm. Jamila had no idea what hockey was but whatever it was, he definitely was built. Jamila turned slightly as she rubbed his arm, making sure that those two bitches could see that she was touching him.

“You like what you feel,” Jonathan asked, his voice slightly deeper with a sultry tone.

Unable to resist the bait, Jamila replied, “Of course,” licking her lips. There was no problem in flirting with him, she thought to herself as he smirked at her.

Jonathan’s eyes were on her lips. She had full lips, made for kissing. Jamila wasn’t his usual type but Jonathan didn’t have a problem with that. “There’s more that you can-,” he started before someone bellowed, “TAZER!”

Jamila whipped around towards the sound, annoyed to have been interrupted before her attention was caught by the kind of guy of her dreams. He was tall, auburn haired, and looked like a lumberjack. He was perfection and he came over to them.

“Duncs,” Jonathan called.

The lumberjack said, “Heyy Tazer.”

Jamila smiled. Maybe this whole drink mix-up thing was working out for her, she thought until she saw her LA friend, Shan, come up behind this Duncs guy. Shan’s brother Alex was with them, his ever present backwards cap covering his hair.

Jonathan loved Duncs as a brother but right now, he was annoyed and pissed. He had been close to sealing the deal but Jamila was now looking at Duncs like he was the last man on earth. Then Jamila gave him a brilliant smile and Jonathan suddenly realized that he was totally fucked.

“Hi,” Jamila purred, forgetting that her hand was still on Jonathan’s bicep. Duncan looked at that and raised an eyebrow at his captain. Jonathan gave him a glare and Duncan made a motion with his hands.

Before Duncan could reply, Shan yelled, “Jamillllaaa!! Long time no see!”

“Hi Shan,” Jamila drily replied, glad she used her preferred name instead of her first name. Shan was a fellow child actress, a Canadian who managed to get supporting roles at Disney over the years before transitioning to a character actress when she became an adult. Shan was the only one whose parents were actually on-set all of the time and paid attention to what was going on. Consequently, Shan was the only one who didn’t have substance abuse problems, etc. and the only one from her former shows that Jamila kept in contact with.

Jonathan looked at Shan and Jamila. “You two know each other?”

Shan drunkenly giggled as Alex closed his eyes. “We were both Disney kids back in the day.”

Jamila sardonically smiled. “Those were fun days.”

“I’m sorry,” Alex replied. “Shan’s got a role in one of the next Marvel movies so she decided to celebrate.”

“Congratulations,” Jamila sincerely stated. Getting a role in the MCU was a steady check and something to celebrate. Then Jonathan took a double take and looked at her and Jamila groaned. He bit one of his thin lips and then he smirked before putting a finger to his mouth. Jamila exhaled and gave him her biggest smile. He recognized her but he didn’t say anything. Jamila leaned over and whispered into Jonathan’s ear, “You just got a second point.”

“Then maybe you should let me have your number,” Jonathan purred into Jamila’s ear.

Jamila smirked, rolling her eyes but before she could respond, Shan slurred, “Wow, Jamila, you waste no time. You were just telling me yesterday that you didn’t know a damn thing about hockey and tonight, you’re talking with Captain Serious.”

Jonathan wanted to shake his teammate’s sister because Jamila shut down, pursing her lips.

Oblivious, Shan continued, “Now, you don’t have an excuse not to go with my brother to the bowling thing.”

Alex face-palmed as Jamila pinched the bridge of her nose. She had totally forgotten about that and of course, when Shan was drunk, she was loud and obnoxious.

Pasting her best fake smile on her face, Jamila said, “I think it’s time for me to go.”

“So soon,” Duncan teased.

Jamila smirked at him, looking him up and down. “I need my beauty rest and to not strangle my friend.”

Jonathan gritted his teeth as he watched Jamila eye his friend. Then she turned to him and blew him a kiss. “It was nice to meet you, Jonathan,” Jamila said, giving him a wink.

Jonathan smiled back and Jamila was taken aback for a moment. There was a promise in those dark brown eyes and she felt her body begin to respond. Then he licked his lips and for a moment, all Jamila could think about was maybe those lips on her body. Slightly shaking her head, Jamila waved her fingers before going to call an Uber. This was a night.

After getting home, Jamila tossed her bag onto her front table. She suddenly felt exhausted even though it was barely after 11:30pm. Walking into her living room, Jamila saw her other cell phone glowing. Picking it up, she cursed. There were fifteen messages and ten missed calls, all from Janine. The messages started off nice, asking how Jamila was doing to nasty, calling her all kinds of names for not picking up and giving her “mother” money.

Tossing the phone back onto the table, Jamila sighed. Getting a separate cell phone just for her mother’s calls was the best but it was draining just to look at it.

Janine Brown was a bit actress, stage-mother, and now two-bit manager. Janine had always wanted to be an actress, even when she was attending grad school at MIT for physics. There, she met Jayesh Vyas, a student earning a PhD in computer engineering. Within six months, they were married and expecting a child; after two years, they were divorced after pressure from Jayesh’s parents. Jayesh returned to India and Janine was stuck with an 11 month old baby with dimples made of gold.

By the time that Jamila could remember, she was in front of a camera. Her life as a child was in front of a camera; first as the adorable adopted child in Granger vs Granger, then the youngest kid in The Elliot Show as a young child. Then from age 12 to 17, Jamila starred as Jane Lee in the Disney show, Plain Jane. School was on set. Birthdays were celebrated on set. Everything revolved around a set year round until right after Jamila’s 17th birthday.

The aftermath of that birthday was a stay in rehab, a cancelled show, and living with her dad and stepmom full time in Atlanta.

Jamila promptly deleted all the messages and voicemails before going on online banking. After authorizing a transfer to Janine’s account, Jamila showered, put on pajamas, and grabbed her pink Lepidolite and pink quartz crystals. Sitting cross legged, Jamila worked to calm her anxiety so that she could have a restful night sleep.

But in her dreams, she tried to focus on a pair of blue eyes and a lumberjack look. However, she kept dreaming of a pair of deep obsidian brown eyes, a crooked smile, and a deep voice telling her everything he was going to do to her

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ordinaryschmuck · 3 years

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Why Samurai Jack is a Fan-Frickin’-Tastic Character

Salutations, random people on the internet who certainly won’t read this! I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons.

And today, I’d like to introduce you to somebody:

This is Samurai Jack, from the popular Cartoon Network series Samurai Jack. Jack is a rare case. Where most shows would have a cast of main, secondary, and recurring characters of varying sizes, Samurai Jack is a series that mostly follows its titular character on his own. Sure, occasionally, you'll see the Scottsman or Aku making an appearance once in a while. But for ninety-five percent of the series, it's entirely focused on Jack and whatever oddball bounty hunter he's forced to deal with for the next twenty-two minutes. This type of decision can be risky because without quality writing, strictly following the same character week after week could get boring real quick. Thankfully, Samurai Jack is a series that's packed to the brim with incredible writing and direction, making Jack himself a fan-frickin'-tastic character.

How is that possible? Well, let me count the ways.

1. He’s the right type of overpowered

Jack knows almost every fighting style in the world and uses that knowledge to survive every bounty hunter, demon, and/or robot he faces every episode. On paper, this type of character could seem unbelievable given that he's just a mortal man, and even monotonous to know he always wins. But that's the thing: Even though Jack manages to almost always win every fight he's in, it's quickly explained why in the very first episode. Through a montage, we see Jack learning every fighting style from several teachers, each of them helping him prepare for the ultimate battle against Aku, an unspeakable evil. Through the simple act of showing us a few scenes of Jack learning a new skill, it's easy to understand why he's a difficult opponent to beat and easy to believe when he introduces another fighting style we haven't seen him use yet. Plus, while Jack's fighting is formidable, that doesn't make him--

WRONG SHOW! But it's true.

Despite winning every episode, it is never an easy feat. Nearly every battle results in Jack getting beat up and torn apart (Or, his clothes do, anyway). When this happens, it makes the victory feel earned rather than easily given. Take his fight against the beetles in episode three, for example. All of his traps go off without a hitch, and he makes it out while standing upon a pile of his vanquished foes. However, during the fight, his armor got stripped away entirely, and he's now scratched up and covered in robot oil:

That image alone proves that even though he’s winning, it doesn’t come easy for him. That remains a staple throughout most of the series, throwing in a few instances when he temporarily loses only to make his eventual victory all the sweeter. He may be overpowered, but at least it's still entertaining to watch regardless.

2. He adapts quickly

A bit of background information to those who haven't the show (probably should have done this in the beginning, but live and learn, I guess): Jack is an ancient samurai that gets magically teleported to a future where his mortal nemesis rules the world. Now, Jack is forced into an environment vastly different from his own, and in turn, he's forced to deal with a lot of stuff he doesn't know. Most writers would take advantage of this type of predicament to make a ton of fish-out-of-water jokes as a way to poke fun at the idea of a samurai being in a futuristic "utopia" (Or, at least, in Aku's eyes, it's a utopia). Thankfully, the writers avoid that cliche. In fact, if my memory serves me right, there's only one fish-out-of-water joke in the entire series. Which I'm more than grateful for because having a character getting thrown off and confused by the world around him would have gotten old fast. But it's not just being in a future world that Jack quickly gets used to. It's also being in situations he's unfamiliar with. Whether it's learning to fit in with dance-crazed zombies or being turned into a chicken (yes, that happens), it doesn't take too long for Jack to figure out a way to get through his current crisis. It proves that even though Jack is a strong warrior in battle, he's also a strategic one who can't be so easily outsmarted.

3. He plays off of everyone he encounters

Jack, in almost every sense of the word, is a straight man. Most of his humor comes from interacting with the bombastic temperaments of others due to his own behavior being so stoic and calm. The series accomplishes this feat by having the future world filled with colorful personalities, making almost every character the best comedic partner for Jack. Primarily through Aku and the Scottsman, who, as I mentioned before, are the only characters that make regular appearances. These are characters with personalities that clash with Jack's, what with Aku being bombastic and chaotic and the Scottsman being loud and crash. Every time Jack interacts with either of them, comedy almost always follows. A good thing too because while Jack can have his own humorous moments, it's better to pair a straight man with someone insane if you want the laughs to come frequently.

4. He’s still a ton of fun himself!

That being said, Jack is still a riot when he gets to be. By and large, I'd say he has a dry sense of humor, often shining through when he interacts with someone carrying the chaos for the both of them. But, occasionally, there are moments when Jack lets his goofy side out, and it's always funny. They're rare, but that in itself is why they work. Because since Jack always acts so serious in this series, seeing him suddenly break that character results in a laugh because it's something we wouldn't expect from him. If he always acted like this, it wouldn't hit as hard as it would only just be his usual sense of humor. So seeing him smile like an idiot as he's waiting "for the magic to begin" causes me to bust a gut laughing each time.

5. He lives despite tragedy

But not everything is all fun and games for our protagonist.

Jack has one goal in this series: Get back to the past and stop the future of Aku from happening. Several episodes make it clear how strenuous a task this could be, showing Jack briefly losing hope that he'll even complete it. Hell, a good chunk of the final season is him practically given up. He still fights to stop Aku's minions from wreaking havoc, but you can see that the light has left his eyes, and he is more than willing for it to end. But, despite how hard things get and how tragic his life can be, there is always a spark of hope that reminds him what he's fighting for and gives him a second wind to finish it. Even when he's at his lowest point, when everything is seemingly hopeless, Jack will always get back up to defeat Aku, no matter what timeline they're in. It is truly noble and shows just how much of a hero Jack is. In fact--

6. He’s the definition of what a hero should be

At least, to me, he is.

What do I mean? Well, I always believe that a hero is a person who would do everything they can to do the right thing, refusing to let innocent people suffer no matter what the cost. Jack proves it in every episode, frequently the ones where he's inevitably screwed over by his own selflessness. He could easily finish his quest and finally get back to the past, but because it could mean that someone innocent would be badly affected by it, Jack always doubles back to save them. The best example is in the second episode of season two. Jack gets ahold of a fairy that he heard can grant him any wish that he wants, but it's trapped in this ball of energy and will never get out. Jack can just wish to go back to the past and stop Aku once and for all. He only needs to make one simple wish. And what does he wish for? The fairy's freedom.

Because that's who Jack is. He's not the guy who would bargain for the life of another, even if his quest is more important. You can argue all you want that if saving something as inconsequential as the fairy's life is pointless due to tragedies like it being preventable if Jack successfully goes back in time. But that doesn't matter to him. A life is a life, and Jack is not the person to trade it. He's a hero and a damn good one at that.

There are many reasons why Samurai Jack is a fantastic character, but the one above, and the others I've just listed, prove how he is a fan-frickin'-tastic character.

(Sidenote: Does it bother anyone else that, despite five full seasons, we've never known what his real name is? No? Just me? Ok.)

#what i thought about #fan-frickin-tastic characters #samurai jack

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themafia-terrapins · 3 years

Text

Into the night.

A/N: You should read the post before this to get an understanding of this AU. Fair warning, this is pretty long. Enjoy! 💚

Disclaimer: mention of child abuse ahead. Be warned!

Cold. Merciless. Dangerous. Mysterious.

They were the only words that many used to describe the Hamato Clan. No one wanted to mess with them in fear of what they would do, countless stories were told of those who had double crossed them and in result, hadn’t lived to see the next day. The most feared gang caught in a dark and ruthless world of crime, violence, blood and lust. Others wanted their wealth and power but not everything is what it seemed to be.

The cold breeze hit Leonardo’s face, as he gulped down air quickly into his lungs. He was sure those horrid nightmares would have stopped, it had been almost 11 years for God’s sake. Cursing under his breath, he knocked down the tub of medication which rattled on the floor. The view of New York was beautiful from all the way up here and as frantically as he tried to focus on it, those poisonous thoughts blazed through his mind and he had no power to control it.

“Father please don’t leave again” The young teen cried, trailing helplessly after the rat who swore angrily. Being only 13, he wasn’t able to grab those supplies that his brothers needed. They were forced to rely on Splinter but he would hardly help them. They were lucky if he even brought down the bare necessities for them to survive on.

“How many times do I have to tell you leave me alone?! Enough!” Splinter growled, loosening his tie as he made his way to the sewers steps. But Leo had to try for his brothers, he couldn’t look at their pain anymore. He couldn’t go back empty handed, to witness Raphael put up a brave front despite actively bleeding and bruised practically everywhere on his frail body. He couldn’t see Donnie on the verge of another panic attack because he didn’t know how to fix them. He couldn’t bear to see Mikey trying to hold it all together but breaking down in the bathroom , when he thought nobody was listening because he couldn’t live in this nightmare.

“R-Raph is hurt and we don’t have any more bandages” Leo spoke timidly, trying to sound clear and confident but his voice trembled. Splinter stood still and the turtle could already smell the sour whiskey from his clothes. It had been a bad day, he presumed. Whiskey was only drunk whenever a loss was incurred. And that usually meant he wouldn’t be home for days, much o the turtle’s pleasure.

“What have I said about speaking back?!” Splinter bellowed, his arm whacking Leo backwards until his shell hit the tunnel. The side of his shell had already been damaged due to constantly training day and night to perfect the routine Splinter had set them. But an audible crack had been heard and a small gasp left his lips, already seeing a trickle of blood roll down his skin staining the previous bandages. He hadn’t even time to register the pain until Splinter loomed over his body, his eyes black and dangerous.

“Father I’m-” Leo’s breath hitched in his throat, tears prickling his eyes painfully watching his hand raise slowly. ‘Not again, please not again’

“You’re absolutely hopeless, you hear me?!” Again Splinter punched the turtle, laughing each time when the terrapin recoiled in pain. Leonardo held his tongue, scared to further anger the drunken rat. Every slap, punch and kick was taken without a sound because the punishment for wincing was double the amount than the beating now. And he wasn’t so sure his shell could take anymore.

“Look at you! You expect to take on my legacy acting like a pathetic little girl?! Get out of my sight before I finish you” With one swift punch to Leo’s jaw, Splinter left to go topside. He could hear his evil voice cackle on the phone to one of his partners in this mysterious business he refused to utter a word about.

“Why do you hit us so much? What did we ever do to you?” Leo sobbed quietly, curling into a little ball on the floor. The punch on his plastron seared throughout his body, burning in hot white pain. Yet it must be nothing compared to what his brothers were going through. They were awaiting Leo but the eldest could barely move, let alone walk to their home.

Home, usually described at being comforting and loving but he hadn’t felt any of these emotions since they moved in. He used to yearn for a mother to come and take their pain away but as he grew, that dream slowly died as hope in him also began to wither.

Maybe one day things would be different...

---

Blaring traffic shocked the turtle out of his trance and with a shuddering breath, he took several deep breaths. He l

“Why must I be reminded of such memories?” Leonardo sighed, his hand drifting over his temple to soothe the dull ache. No matter how long it had been, the wound from his past was still fresh. They say time healed all pain so why did his still hurt? Some nights it was bearable and some nights it felt like he was being suffocated in his mind, slowly driving insane.

Physical pain definitely was a lot more tolerable than verbal, even now he could still hear the echo of Splinter’s voice reprimanding him whenever he failed. Those stabbing words ringing louder and louder in his ears, berating him for being stupid and weak. Laughing at how his ridiculous attempt of leading a team. Leonardo never wanted anything more than to make Splinter proud but during his years, he realised that it was never going to happen.

Splinter only cared for himself and Leo, along with his brothers, were merely pawns in his cruel game.

But now was not the time to dwell on these matters, things had to be done and completed. His phone rang jarring him out of his thoughts and he picked it up rather reluctantly.

“What is it, Silas?” His assistant/companion spoke quickly, picking up the disinterest in Leo’s voice. He was never one for sugarcoating his feelings or emotions, if the boss wanted something done it was pronto.

“Beast is requesting dinner with capo and the mob. Your presence is required, sir” Holding his urge to groan, the turtle glanced down at the lights that decorated the buildings of New York. They were so beautiful but he couldn’t even take the time to appreciate it, reality had called and with great reluctance he had to answer.

Beast... what was there to say? He was a snob, ignorant, extremely wealthy but lacked any common sense or values. Leo’s patience was practically non existent whenever he communicated with him. While he provided a great reference for other business partners, Beast himself was on thin ice with the brothers.

“Dinner at... 1am?” Leo scowled, looking at his watch. Beast, while had been an average business partner, had constant demands and ideas that were completely absurd. The brothers were tiring of his constant requests and awful timing.

“I did not suggest the convocation at this late sir” The assistant began but Leo interrupted him, wanting to end this conversation.

“Be that as it may, unfortunately I cannot attend. Cancel my plans for tonight, I have a reconciliation to attend to and the conference will take up most my time” He ordered, observing the bonsai trees that stood on the balcony. One thing he grew to adore was his plants, they were simple and with enough care and love, blossomed into something gorgeous.

“I don’t think Beast will be pleased with the rejection. He only wants a few words with the mob and especially you, Capo” Silas tried to reason but the terrapin was adamant.

“Enough. Reschedule this meeting tomorrow at 11pm sharp. Am I understood?” Leo commanded and Silas nodded, already writing it down in his notepad.

“Crystal. Enjoy your night sir” ‘Unlikely’... Hanging up, the blue cladded turtle inhaled a deep breath to collect his thoughts. Cancelling the meeting is a mistake but there were bigger fish to fry tonight. Other duties lay heavy on his mind and with a turn of his heel, he left his safe haven.

As he entered his room, a young woman appeared at his door. Her heels echoed on the polished marble floors, grinding on his last nerve. God he really didn’t want to deal with her right in this moment. Her eyes settled on his and her face lifted into a small smile, one he did not mirror back.

“Katherine, what brings you to my quarters? Surely you’re old enough to understand you cannot barge in whenever you please” Leonardo watched as the young woman quickly stepped back, picking up the heavy discomfort that lay in the air.

“My apologies Leonardo. It’s Raphael, he said that you guys are attending a conference tonight but it’s our 3 month-”

“I fail to understand how this is my problem” He was quick in letting her know, he hadn’t the time to listen to her. Truth be told, he would never understand why Raphael stuck with her. She caused more pain and grief than anything to him.

“Okay... but could you tell me at least why?” She cocked her head and Leo turned, his face set in a hard frown.

“That is between me and my brothers Katherine. I do not appreciate when people interfere in my business. That much should be painfully obvious” His tone was calm but the harsh voice was clearly heard.

Opening his cupboard door, the small picture of Eva caught his eye. A small pang of sadness washed over his body before getting a grip on himself, refusing himself to succumb to the weakness. Eva was the past yet it seemed no matter how long the years had gone by, the yearn was as strong as ever. He wondered if he would ever be free from the shackles around his heart that locked tightly in his chest.

He had to accept that no matter how much he hoped on a wishing star or to the sky, she simply was not coming back. On the side showed a glass mirror, outlining all the features on his face. Sleep hadn’t come to the turtle much recently, he was lucky to get 4 hours and that was on a good day.

“You know you can just call me Kiki like everyone else” She raised her brow as he grabbed his navy blue velvet suit, the unreadable facial expression plastered on his face while his dark sapphire eyes burned into hers. Still standing at the doorway, she felt almost scared of him. Despite being with his brother for around 8 years, she never felt like she knew Leo. No one did, he kept to himself and only showed his true colours to those he cared about.

“Katherine, if that is all you have come to say then I highly suggest you leave me be now. It would not bode well for you to overstep your boundaries” With an almost snarl, he walked forwards and closed his door.

---

“Would you like some champagne, Mr Hamato? It’s the one you specifically requested, Dom Pérignon” The waiter asked and Leo nodded his head, flicking through the newspapers as he awaited the rest of his brothers to join him. This meeting was better suited to the office, he didn’t need any extra ears or eyes to listen in on the information discussed between them.

“God, I need a drink” He could hear the brute’s voice carry through the halls and into the meeting room.

“Right away boss” Greyson, his assistant spoke and vanished to make his preferred alcoholic beverage.

“What is the occasion, dear brother? As much as I like to spend time with you, I’m assuming you haven’t called us for fun” Donnie sat down, his ankle resting on top of his thigh as his attention diverted to his brother. Delicately folding the papers up and placing them to the side, Leo eyed his younger brother with a smirk.

“Always straight to the point Donatello. And you’d be correct, I’ve called this meeting to discuss our next steps” He spoke authoritatively as the turtles settled in their seats, glancing at the board which held ideas and secret plans.

“Did ya cancel tha meetin’ with Beast tonight?” Raph asked, eyes skimming at the tablet. That was very unlikely of the leader, he was the one always nagging to keep up with business meetings and such.

“Yes, I’ll be damned if I have to listen to another lie of his again. He cannot speak clearly and I have no time for beating around the bush. Once we’re done with this proposal, it will be a big relief to have him off our backs” Leo sipped his wine, flicking through his notes. A few names picked up but on the whole, everything seemed relatively calm. But there was no resting, they couldn’t afford not to be on their guard. Trouble was brewing on the horizon, he could feel it in his body.

“Fuck sake, how many times do I have to tell you I hate when you organise my notes like this” Mikey sighed irritably as his brothers smirked, looking at each other with amusement.

It was a running joke that Mikey couldn’t hold an assistant down for more than 2 months. Perhaps it was his picky way of being organised or that he had a short temper and hated his things being out of place, they didn’t know. This new assistant fumbled with the drinks, paling as his boss shouted his displeasure.

“What happened to Donetti Licata?” Donatello asked, chuckling at his younger brother expecting another childish story about organisation as it as had been the story before.

“Fired him. Caught him screwing Mia in my bed. Which reminds me I really need to employ someone who actually has a working braincell” Mikey spoke nonchalantly while his brothers looked at each other wide eyed.

“Oh... shit. M’sorry Mike, that must’ve been hard” Raph murmured, surprised at how well his little brother was taking the whole thing. Almost... too well in his opinion. Amelia had been the light of his life, his love at one point. They both brought out the best in each other but perhaps it was simply a mirage to the toxicity that lay just under the surface.

She wasn’t the Amelia he fell in love with and as he came to grips with that, the idea of losing her forever felt absolutely scary to him. He tried everything to put their relationship on track but it was Amelia who refused to partake in anything.

“Hmm? Oh.. yeah. It was tolerable once I beat the shit out of him. I can’t ever believe I trusted the fucker....” Mikey leaned back on his chair as another glass of wine was placed in front of him. Yet the lump in his throat felt unmovable, rendering him breathless.

“Don’t tell me ya still wit’ her Mike. Yer deserve better than that” Raphael’s hand ached to knock some sense into the terrapin. Even if she would countlessly cheat on him, which she probably had done, all she had to do was flutter her lashes and sweet talk him. And just like that Mikey would forgive her in that second. In his eyes, Mia could do no wrong. She had Mikey on a leash but of course, he was oblivious to it all.

“You still with Kiki?” Mikey retorted, venom in his words while his eyes glared at his brother. Raphael’s frown deepened, holding his gaze. While he knew it was in the heat of the moment, he wished Mikey could see the damage Amelia was doing to him. Kiki was different only because Raph knew her past, knew that she was damaged too. How could he, of all people, leave her hanging alone?

“Children, behave. What do we do about these last few payments? I’ve talked to Xavier and he’s saying Gomez hasn’t responded to anything. It’s high time we pay a special visit, he’s got to know who exactly he’s messing with here” Donnie rolled his eyes at the quarrel and adjusted his glasses, raising them closer to his eyes. Leonardo seemed to be in deep thought for a few seconds before looking at his family again.

“If that’s the case then I want you and Mikey to check it out tomorrow. Me and Raph will deal with Beast, we all know how dramatic he likes to get when he doesn’t get his way” They all knew the last time they messed with Beast, how he threatened to take his money away and leave them bankrupt. Regardless of his filthy money, the turtles were not affected without it.

Years of investing and saving up had allowed them to live luxuriously. They had everything they ever wanted, Beast was just a liability to them. They needed him to increase potential business partners. To be able to stay at the top, they needed to associate with people at the top. If that meant doing business with idiots who couldn’t hold their ground and lacked any sense of morals and values, then so be it.

This was the mafia, after all. Nothing was pretty here.

“He’s clearly trying to inherit the property, why not just kill him altogether” Mikey pointed out, leaning back on his chair but Leo shook his head.

“Too risky. He may be a fool but he’s a smart one. He has plenty of connections with others, much powerful than the ones we have. We’ll keep him on the side but don’t turn your eyes, he will strike when least expected. Once we secure this deal, you can unleash all your anger on him. For now, we stay in his good books. However long that may be” He grimaced at the thought of the meeting they were supposed to have instead of this one. How long the turtle brothers would remain on his good side was unknown but hey, only a few more months of his bullshit and it was home run. The brothers continued to talk about upcoming events and nearing the end of the meeting, they all grabbed their belongings.

“Wait a sec, Amara’s coming here tomorrow?” Mikey read out the small note on the board and Leo nodded, finishing off his wine.

“Yes, well technically she’s visiting but we needed some help around here and she agreed to stick around for a while” She was a close friend to the turtles, meeting them after they newly escaped Splinter’s clutches. She had found them at a time when they were barely breathing and even without knowing who they were, she nursed them back to health. They all were indebted to her. Throughout the years, she went back to Italy since her father was part of their own mafia but her loyalty to the turtles never wavered.

“At least we get ta see a new face ‘round here. But goin’ back ta before, I can’t wait ta finally kill that bastard” Raphael cracked his knuckles, unbuttoning his vest. He never was one to take orders from people, he was incredibly stubborn and arrogant to take commands from someone else. He barely followed Leo’s on a good day, let alone someone who continually threatened him and his family. If it were up-to him, he would have Beast’s head on a silver platter and sent directly to his team

“All in due time brother. For now, let’s focus on getting our money back and dealing with Beast”

#tmnt mafia!turtles #tmnt mafia!leonardo #tmnt mafia!raphael #tmnt mafia!donatello #tmnt mafia!michelangelo

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purplerose244 · 3 years

Text

My thoughts on Seabound!!! 🌊🌊🌊 (2/4)

SPOILERS ALERT!!!

For now, nothing to complain about! We got Nya, we got MAYA AND RAY, we got GILES PANTON BACK A LEGO SHOW!!! 😍😍😍

Of course now I'm definitely curious about what the story is really about, like I'm guessing Wojira will wake up at some point so... Great Devourer all over again maybe? 😅 Idk, for now I just wanna enjoy Nya having her moment 🥳

Alright, here we go!

GENERAL THOUGHTS

New alert for reader, during the Nexo Knights period I was and still am the hugest Clay fan. Now that his voice is in this season I might scream more than necessary... keep that in mind 😅

I love the humor in this, all random but still kinda clever 😂😂 Maybe I'm biased because I love Jay but still 🤷‍♀️

I really like the design of the marine world, very cool!! 🌊🌊🌊

I guess I'm not really seeing any big plot twist moment for now? Ninjago seasons have history of basing seasons on a "we need to prevent this event from happening but it will happen anyway", so I can see Wojira waking up no matter what 🤷‍♀️

I wonder if that will be shocking? Usually when this situation happen, someone makes a major sacrifice (Zane with the Overlord, sensei Garmaron with Chen, again sensei G with the Preeminent...). Maybe Maya? I DON'T WANT THAT 😭 But I am curious, everything is going nicely and I'm not sure what it will bring! 🤩 I'M EXCITED SO LET'S GO!!!

THE WRATH OF KALMAAR

So this is the name of Clay's new incarnation, neat! 👍

Okay really, for having a season lately the main character just can't help but be trapped by the villain: kinda Zane in the ICE Chapter, Jay in Prime Empire, Cole in Master of the Mountain... we can call it a tradition at this point 🤷‍♀️

Giant serpent, yadda yadda, I wonder if we're gonna address the Great Devourer at some point? Not mandatory, but the reference would be very cool 🤩

Clay's new incarnation is a prince I- *hyperventilates in awe*

Nya playing dumb lol, I don't know if that's personal experience as she used to get kidnapped a lot in the past or she just have too many idiots in her life 😂

ALSO ANOTHER BEST GIRL'S SMIRK

NYA YOU'RE TOO MUCH ILY ❤💙❤💙

Jay I love that you're so worried about Nya but maybe try NOT TO DIE? YOU'RE WITH LLOYD AND ZANE YET YOU'RE THE ONE GOING FOR THE SACRIFICE WTH?? 😱 But he's worried about his cool GF I kinda get it, also he didn't do it so good...

WHAT. THE. HECK.

WHO ARE YOU OH MY FIRST SPINJITZU MASTER YOU'RE ADORABLE I WANNA KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU YOU ABSOLUTE CUTIE 🤩🤩🤩

So Giles is doomed to voice LEGO characters with daddy issues 😂 That being not having a dad at all or having one that is... a good guy? Idk he seems chill with the surface at first glance, I wonder what's the story of this family

Maya reminds of my mom, she also mentions her work a lot and I study the same thing. But she doesn't want to brag, it gets annoying but she just wants to give me advice. It's nice to see actually 👍 Also Ray reference NEAT ❤❤❤

Wow, if any child-parent couple of this show was doomed at going semi Emperor's New Groove style, I would've bet on Ed and Jay honestly 😅

Oh HECK yes I knew that with my water girls things were BOUND to get cool 😎 ... yeah I know where the door is *goes away*

JAY NO WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT TRYING TO DIE STOP DOING WHAT YOU'RE DOING!!! 😱😱😱

My GOSH that scared the crap out of me 😅 Jay honey we have too many deaths in this team, you're not helping... BUT YOU POWERED AN ENTIRE SHIP BECAUSE YOU LOVE NYA AND YOU DIDN'T DIE AND I LOVE YOU SO MUCH BLUEBELL 💙💙💙

They were all so worried, I love this ninja family so freaking much 💜💜💜 Also better not tell this one to his GF 😂

And Bluebell?

Welcome to the "change eye color because of elemental power" team! WE GOT ANOTHER ONE I LOVE WHEN IT HAPPENS!!! 😍😍😍

Awww, Zane letting Jay be the captain, that was so cute of him 💕

Another great episode! Doing great so far but I still wonder if we got into the main story. Feels like there should be more, well we got time! Next one! 😊

LONG LIVE THE KING

Sooooo... that's one very telling title 😅 If we're going full Lion King on this one, I think I know where this is going 😵

Maya: Don't they know that metal taste terrible?!? (Again feels like Kai could say something like this 😂)

FINALLY NYA USING FREAKING WATER POWERS UNDER THE SEA!!! Thank you Maya for saying out loud what we were all thinking 👌👌

NINJA TO THE RESCUE!!!

Pff, okay, the fact that Kalmaar is all evil and cruel and then he gets startled like that, it's kind or adorable! 💕 Honestly Giles got such a deep voice, with Clay it was firm warm and reassuring, here we got plain devious and I ADORE it 😍😍😍

Maya come on don't doubt your daughter 😅 But I like her, and if she knew Nya they way we all do she wouldn't doubt that she could make it every time 😎

Yeah I was right, the king seems chill... oww I fear what's coming then 😳

Okay, so Kalmaar thinks that the world should go back to be lead by them like in the past, while the king just wants peace with the surface. And as we know, no drama no season so...

Yep, saw the death coming 😅

WHOA DID NOT SEE THAT LITTLE BLAME ACT COMING KALMAAR IS SO EVIL!!!... with a glorious voice but still (Rose focus on something that is not that godlike voice, you can do it 💪💪)

THE OLD ONE TWO I LOVE THIS SO MUCH COMBO ATTACK!!! 🌊❄🌊❄

Awww Benthomaar is actually really cute, he's so worried about his father 😢 And he's adopted apparently? I wanna know the story!!! 🤩🤩

Yep, there's the reason why Zane got a mask even though he doesn't need one, it completes his attire 😂😂😂 My gosh how I love this nindroid ❄

Did... did Jay just say phooey? Dude Ducktales ended a while ago but I'm still not over it 😭

I said it once before I'll say it again, Ninjago is really REALLY good at making death scenes. Like, omg, I genuinely felt sorry for them 😢😢 I also really liked that the king didn't ask to be avenged, he still wanted peace and he asked his son to protect the ninja and he cried actual tears...

MY HEART WTH 😭😭😭 So we're adding this to the real tears moments of the show, with Jay crying over pie, Zane with the flashback of his dad, Jay crying over Nya and Lloyd thinking the ninja are gone... my world this show is angsty 🙂

Third startle for prince Kalmaar, I love the gag 😂 Oh wait, king Kalmaar 🤷‍♀️

Okay, we got a coup, the ninja running away because they got framed, Benthomaar is most likely going to join them or at least help them, I guess Wojira will come out at some point while... Kai, Ray and Cole are still playing videogames? 😅

THIS IS GETTING COOL I WONDER WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT AAAAHHH HECK YES THERE IS THE HYPE!!! 😍😍😍

Although I hope we get more stuff with Nya and Maya, that's what I like 🤩

ESCAPE FROM MERLOPIA

I'm good at English and I can follow most of it, but the fantasy names are tricky so I didn't get before that this was the name of the place 😅 It's nice, at least it's not another Atlantis 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

LLOYD I SWEAR TO YOUR GRANDPA IF YOU TRY TO DIE AGAIN 😱

NYA YOU ARE NOT A GOOD SUBSTITUTE NONE OF YOU ARE OMG 😱😱

Ah, there he is, my new son Benthomaar 💙 He is so lovable already, I know nearly nothing about him and I like his character already a lot! He could relate with all of the ninja really, but maybe with Jay the most? They were both adopted after all 🤔🤔

*scribble note for a fanfic for later if this doesn't come up in the season*

Alright moving on 😗

I am so happy Nya gets a season, Kelly got a great emotional range that doesn't come out often in my opinion, but with a full introspection of water goddess we are all blessed by her voice acting 😍

Gotta say, admitting that Bentho didn't have to help them to answer the usual 'Can we trust him' question is pretty reasonable, like, better than other stupid answers 😅

Also don't mind me

Just screenshotting by ship 💙❤💙❤

Somehow lately we are letting Jay do the talking and I both hate and LOVE the fact 😂😂 Plain Bluebell nonsense, heck yes that's my jam👌👌

MAYA IS SO COOL OMG 🤩🤩

I literally can't not laugh at the startle gag with Kalmaar 😂

LLOYD WHAT DID I JUST SAY ABOUT SELF SACRIFICING!! PLEASE IT'S NOT EVEN YOUR SEASON!! 😱😱😱😱

Aww Jay is still the Captain, nice! Wonder if it's giving him Skybound flashbacks... I hope not considering all he went through that time, poor Sparky 😅😅

ARE THOSE LITTLE WU ROCKETS?? 🤯

Can we skip a season and hang out with Pixal one time? I really wanna know how she organizes her free time to create these things 😍😍😍

THANK YOU LLOYD FOR NOT DYING ONCE AGAIN, MUCH APPRECIATED!!! 💚💚💚 My green bean needs a vacation... they all do 😅

THEY ARE

SO BEAUTIFUL 💙🌊💙🌊

Alright, back to the island hoping Kalmaar will not track us and follow us so he can get to the place and discover the amulet 🙂

Are we not calling the others? I miss my flame babe and Rocky ❤🖤❤🖤 Also RAY WATCHA DOIN I WANNA KNOW EVERYTHING 🤩🤩

THE TALE OF BENTHOMAAR

Wait what? Shark boy backstory? SHARK BOY BACKSTORY?!? 👀👀👀

Wow, I see that Kalmaar didn't change a thing growing up, still the same gonna-be-a-villain 😂 Of course his voice got a lot deeper and cool and okay you know I love his voice moving on

I find it kinda funny that Kalmaar is so focused on royal blood and superiority, while Clay was basically a farm boy who worked his way up. Giles knows how to get the character no matter what 😍

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH

BABY BENTHOMAAR AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍💙💙💙💙💙💙💙

The king seems like such a good pers- fish- creature 😅 Now I'm double sad that he died, my world, why do I always care so fast, it's not healthy in this show where everyone could die 😰😰

I'M SORRY IS THAT KAI'S HAIR??? 😂😂😂 I LITERALLY CAN'T LOOK AWAY WTH I DON'T KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT THIS

Literally every frame of Benthomaar makes me love him even more 😢

Interesting that we got an academic villain, he kinda reminds me of Clouse in a way, maybe even Harumi since she studied her way to her plan as well? I like that we got a bit of personality too!

Using your little bro for your own purpose... it's very evil but kinda also brotherly like 😂

Benthomaar really gives me that very PRECIOUS vibe, kinda the perfect son but also a naive and unaware BABY 💙

LEGO HUG 🤩🤩 Not exactly reciprocated but still 😅

Ooohhh, so this is how he found the temple! I like this, it shows that Bentho is most likely physically stronger than Kalmaar, while evil brother is focused on brain and studies. They are planned differently, I like it! 😚😚

Ouch, peer pressure... sibling pressure? Eh you get what I mean 😂

POOR BENTHO 😭😭😭 YOU GOT THE NINJA NOW DON'T WORRY WE'RE NEVER GONNA LEAVE YOU ALONE YOU PRECIOUS SHARK BABY!! 🦈🦈🦈

Bentho: will I really fit in with you guys? Do you really understand how I feel?

Lloyd: Jay was adopted, Nya's parents were gone most of her life, Zane lost his father while mine turned evil

Bentho(tearing up): yeah that can work

Okaaaaayyyyy, I like that we got a bit of backstory for Bentho too! We didn't get much for Vanya in Master of the Mountain, which is the only thing I was sad about (very little detail, AMAZING season 🖤🖤🖤), nice to see it here!!

But I really want more Nya and Maya interactions, I hope we'll soon get to them again!! 😍😍😍

Alright, getting somewhere here! I'm very curious about what's next 🤩🤩

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