#i cant be the first one to point this out but i honestly cant find any posts abt it

[weebsinstash]

I was seeing videos of these specific heart-shaped "slip chains" which are basically bdsm leashes that can be lowkey disguised as necklaces and I started having ideas about "oh what if yandere Valentino put one of these on you and you didn't even know he has you wearing a leash" AND IN THE FUCKING COMMENTS OF THE VIDEO--

So yeah, could you imagine him slipping the loose chain around you while you're serving him drinks or invited for a fun time with him and other people and he's essentially getting off on you being clueless and unknowingly wearing something so kinky (that he has all kinds of ideas and fantasies about using). At first you think it's just a necklace, a cute gift, you aren't even aware of what it means and are just feeling happy and thinking it's so cute, and then, at some point in the night, he gets mad or possessive and just, tugs the lead and you're suddenly painfully horribly aware he's got you on a lead 😳 like. In Public In Front Of Other People, too.

I feel like yandere Valentino would have a full custom kit of toys and tools he WANTS to use on you before he's so much as even FLIRTED WITH YOU. Imagine actually going to fuck this man and he already has things planned, fantasies to try out, and, it turns out he's been thinking about sleeping with you, uh, a lot more in depth and often than you're comfortable with

I'm just. Sitting here. Imagining being mid fuck and little comments just start slipping out of his mouth,

"Hang on, I wanted to try this position with you--" wait how long have you been thinking of us having sex?

"You're a lot quieter than I was hoping you would be, but this is hot too" bitch what do you MEAN 'hoping'???

You fuck him ONCE and the next time he's trying to get you to let him hit, he has a SUSPICIOUS amount of lingerie that is perfectly in your size and bondage gear that's perfectly sized for your wrists and ankles and maybe shit is even PERSONALLY MONOGRAMED, like forget bullshit like "Baby" or "Pet" or something vague, it'll be YOUR NAME or a nickname he uses ONLY for you, so, he obviously had it MADE to be used on you specifically

Idk I'm just. I promise I'm normal and am not constantly thinking about what kinds of accessories and toys this man would have personally custom made because he just loves spoiling himself and playing with his money with reckless abandon 👀 I promise I'm not like, imagining Valentino having entire closets and rooms dedicated to YOU specifically. Gosh. Just imagine the gun case he has in episode four, except when he opens THIS one, the doors are covered with humiliating, exposing photos of you and all his crops and toys are displayed and loaded into drawers 💀 honestly just the hypothetical scenario of, you have never even kissed this man and you're in his tower and, you snoop a little while he's making you wait, and you find this cabinet absolutely COATED with photos of you, and there are also collars and other things with your name on them

also finally just 👀 the overall design of this chain means if he has it pulled taut enough, you literally can't pull it off by yourself, cant give yourself enough slack to unwind it, so you're just forced to sit there with your face feeling like it's on fire while he's actively holding the other end of your lead, constantly reminding the both of you that you're his new favorite little plaything and using the public humiliation to get you to behave. Honestly I think being forced into a one-sided dom/sub kinda relationship with him specifically is a brand new kind of Hell in of itself, but that's a post for another time

#yandere hazbin hotel #yandere hellaverse #valentino x reader #hh #sinprompts

[productivemswright]

I am in love with Northern Hollywood Henry but the man is Pleakley

#but the man is honestly pleakley #i cant be the first one to point this out but i honestly cant find any posts abt it #barry hbo #noho hank #pleakley #anthony carrigan #sally Reed #bill hader #barry berkman #barry block #barry

[homo-house]

re:hbomberguy, on the topic of citing sources, i want to say:

it is insane how many people on here don't even click the sources op links on their own post to learn more and just hit reblog saying "oh my i didn't know about this thank you for teaching me!". like guys CLICK THE LINK!! CHECK THE NOTES!!! CHECK THE SOURCE!.... i swear half the time the link is dead or takes you to a nonsense page (i see this a lot with art specifically???? and excerpts from magazines??) and some times the linked source disproves a claim the very post that linked it made and people just. don't bother to check, no one bothers to even reblog saying "hey that link is dead! here's a new, working link!" or "hey that link doesn't work, can you link the source again?" and when it comes to misinformation people just share without checking or looking at the notes where numerous people will (in the best case scenario) already be pointing out the misinformation

"OH BUT I CAN'T CHECK EVERYTHING I SEE ON THE INTERNET" there is a surefire way to prevent spreading this kind of stuff even if you don't have the time to fact check immediately. just accept it's fine to save a post for later if you can't look deeper into it right now!!!!! literally just reblog it in private or save the post as a draft so you can come back to it later and check. it won't kill you and in fact it will actually make your life a lot better lol

#hbomberguy #misinformation #plagiarism #adding those for reach honestly because im kinda pissed rn #heres some more on citing sources for this week! sometimes people cite sources and THEY DON'T EXIST. it is REALLY frustrating #people do this to PRETEND they linked to the original artist a lot here on tumblr when theyre actually linking 1- nothing or 2- google imgs #it drives me INSANE #and sometimes they will add “source: xyz magazine” and then you go look for it and there is no available source. its just a loop of- #one person quoting another on where the source came from and none of them actually checked the source #ALSO sometimes journalists will do this kind of crazy bullshit where they quote something from wikipedia thinking the wiki source is real- #and it turns out to not align with the statement in the wiki and so the journalist claims that without checking or sourcing and then #other news sources will quote the journalist on that cyclically up until the point where the journalist that used wikipedia as a source- #becomes a source for wikipedia #'confirming' the statement that actually came from there in the first place #there is a name for this phenomenom but i cant remember it if i find it i'll reblog with an addition #sorry if you saw this before i deleted it to word it better

[little-ajax-56793]

I love being stubborn about random historical interpretations. The American Revolution lasted from the Stamp Act Congress in 1765 to the Treaty of Ghent in 1814. (Treaty of Ghent and not the War of 1812 because fuck Andrew Jackson specifically.) Change my mind. You can't. Anyway the scariest thing about being trans is that I'm going from girl who likes history (sexy) to guy who likes history (red flag)

#mercury mumbles #does that mean we kinda lost bc war of 1812 was a shit show? little bit ngl #but like #presidents washington though madison were all revolutionarys #washington and madison were veterans of the amrev actually #(madison was a colonel but he never saw actual combat just drilled) #majority of major political events from 1781 (yorktown) to 1815 (new orleans) werent expanding on anything they were ESTABLISHING #judicial review powers of exec branch necessary and proper clause etc #and then war of 1812 marks the us's first time defending their sovereignty and truly establishing that britian cant fuck around #and that find out would actually happen #but we did get fucking crushed we lost 1812 BIGTIME they burned down the fucking capital #but the treaty of ghent is the first time england treated america as like. actually seperate. #and then the presidents after madison arent known for being founders anymore. #monroe is a protege of jefferson (honestly i could extend the end point of amrev to monroe doctrine). jqadams is adams son #a jackson was a rev war vet but whats he known for? battle of new orleans! (the war was already over tho. useless and fuck a jackson) #yeah. nerd time. #anyway my apush teacher liked my embargo of 1807 shirt #oh no i just realized that one of my tags up there contains amr/v and its gonna get caught in those tags (censored for hope it wont) #i dont care enough to change it honestly woe amrev fandom my hot takes be upon ye

[chisatowo]

I have successfully made a brush that I adore idk how much I'll use it but I'm definitely gonna make a few drawings with it at least just to mess around

#rat rambles #I was just messing around with some settings and found out how to make some brushes less soft and more pixely #which has made this one brush I drew those last two drawings with from a eh brush to an absolute delight to mw #oc posting #anyone whos ever used a brush in someones art being too pixely as a critique can suck my ass pixely brushes my beloved #I honestly wish I could find a way to recreate super pixely like mspaint style brushes in procreate thatd be fun #Ive tried but I cant find a way to make it work with larger sizes #which is a problem for me the number one thick lineart fan dkfndjdg #I remember having similar problems when I was younger with medibang on my phone #I think I ended up just using the 8bit thing super small to make super little drawings that Id then make bigger #which was too much work I dont wanna do that fnfjdjsjd #but thats actually how I first designes the first of the human kids in eternal gales fun fact #sier was the very first one I designed and then on the same day I designed tali and the snake triplets too #all of them but snek have at this point have had major design overhuals fkdmdkdbd #anyways I need to go to bed now gn gamers

[lsuyia]

❝𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐘 𝐅𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑❞

A/N - ngl i literally pulled this out my ass at 11 am since i rlly needed to start posting on my tumblr more, pls request fic ideas!

relationship is established! also fem!reader

MDNI

ᡣ𐭩

satoru gojo, just seems like the the type of person to randomly be scrolling on instgram,— barely finding interesting and find a video of a baby.

The baby could be doing anything, laughing, giggling, saying its first word,—and like fucking magic will automatically text you about it, spam calling you

it all just started as one simple cute video that satoru saw, making his baby fever go through the roof.

One fucking video, was all it took.

You would get home from work, wanting to take a nap, oh but here he comes, bending you over on the kitchen table, making your legs tremble, just so he can try to get you pregnant.

“Spread wide open f’me, yeah?”

You started to wonder what was going on when one day he magically appeared when you were showering saying he wanted to shower with his beautiful girlfriend, which you knew he was lying straight through his teeth.

Few minutes later, he has you pinned against the shower wall, going at an ungodly pace bruising your cervix in the process with every thrust as he smiles seeing breathless, flustered face.— which some how always seemed to keep him hard.

“Just a little longer for daddy?”

You automatically knew when he said that something was going on, and you were going to get to the bottom of it.

For days straight, satoru would always have you bend over, legs up, on the floor,on the wall, in the bed, in the car fucking you dumb until he finally came inside you.

Everytime.

At this point you were getting concerned that you might actually get you pregnant.

So, you decided to finally open up about the whole dilemma, you couldnt keep going on like this.

“toru baby?” You called out to him after minutes thinking about if you should actually do this. “coming.” He said back as his light footsteps treaded across the living room before finally appearing in-front of you before he sat beside you. “yeah honeybun?” He softly spoke to you while his hand traveled to your thighs, squeezing at the plush.

“I wanted to talk to you about something..” You trailed off at the end, which in gojo’s eyes sounded pretty serious to him. His head immediately turned to look at you looking at you concerned. “Do you think we could like…—calm down with the sex?”

You spoke softly to him not even looking at him out of pure embarrassment of the situation. The silence was so loud after you spoke to him,— until he finally casually spoke back to you“yea baby thats fine, if you wanted to calm down you could’ve told me earlier.” He said with a shrug seeming like the situation didn’t affect him at all.

Oh but, it very much did.

In his eyes, It sounded like you didnt want to have a child with him, which drove him absolutely insane.

The constant sex ban worked for a full month until he was back at it again.

You couldn’t even take off your shoes without him touching your nipples through your clothes, just to turn you on and get you into bed with him.

One thing lead to another and you and him getting into a heated argument in your shared bedroom.

“Gojo, what is up with you? I cant even walk into the fucking house without you trying to finger me!” you exclaimed practically yelling at him. Your attitude towards him at him caught in a dumb daze. You were starting to get tired of the constant sex every day.

He was yelling back before but now he was silent as he stood in front of you not speaking, you rarely ever called him last name which let him know you were pretty serious about the whole ordeal.

He couldn’t keep his need for you under wraps for any longer.

“Honeybun, I want a baby.” He said to you, as his light blue eyes locked with yours.

You were honestly shocked at him, he wanted a baby? The only word you could even speak was

“what?”

“honeybun, I want a baby with you.” He leaned towards you cupping your face as he planted tender kisses.

“I want to see you and me mixed together, I wanna see both of us go through mother and fatherhood, I want to see all of you honeybun.” He said grabbing your hands interlocking them with his. He was really genuine and heartfelt about the whole baby fever nonsense.

You were still in slight shock, but you had a small thought about the idea of you and satoru’s kid still fresh in your mind at the moment

—

Needless to say, you finally found out why gojo was acting crazy all those months ago

You sighed watching television with your pregnant belly while gojo had his arms wrapped around you and his head lightly resting on your stomach, careful not to hurt you at any point

“Their going to be so cute.”

he hummed giving your tummy a tender kiss.

#gojo satoru #jjk smut #jjk gojo #jjk x reader #gojo saturo #x reader #fanfic #smut #jujutsu kaisen x reader #breeding k1nk #gojo x reader #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jujutsu kaisen 18+ #jujustu kaisen #isuyiafics!

[yasminebahng]

skz and how they give you physical affection

notes: some fluff for yall after the angst of my last post ;) was waiting for my lecture to start and suddenly started thinking... how do the boys love to show their affection physically? then started day dreaming and yeah.. enjoy! cw: reader x ot8, mentions of kissing, mentions of showering/bathing together, gn reader

‧₊˚ ✩°｡⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡♡ ⋆˙⟡♡⋆｡°✩˚₊‧‧₊˚ ✩°｡⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡♡ ⋆˙⟡♡⋆｡°✩˚₊‧‧₊˚ ✩°｡⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡

Chan: Resting on you

God knows this man needs a break. When he's exhausted after dance practice or doing interviews all day, the only comfort he can find is in you. He'll trudge over to you, head bowed down, his eyes droopy with sleep and just collapse into your open arms. This happens very frequently actually. When he's working on music, he'll bring his laptop with him while he lays on your chest. He knows he cant be around all the time, and when he is around he's usually busy, so he's grateful that you embrace him while working (I mean, he needs some lovin too.) He'll let you know its time for bed by kissing your arm that's usually resting on his chest or playing with his curls. The rest of the night is spent with cuddles and giggles.

Lee Know: Tracing his fingers on your skin

Lee Know is notorious for avoiding skinship. Out of respect for him, you allow him to initiate it most of the time. Whether it be kisses, hugs, or cuddles, you let him take the reigns. Except for when you ask when you're feeling needy, most of the time he will oblige. So whenever he doesn't really want to kiss or hug, he will draw figures or words on any exposed skin. You find that he does it subconsciously when you both watch movies on the couch or are falling asleep in bed. That's actually the way he told you he loves you the first time. He traced the words on your arm while you spoke, thinking you wouldn't catch it. But you did. You always paid attention when he did that. So you picked up his palm, making eye contact with him the whole time, and traced the words back. The whole day was spent with kisses and arm doodles.

Changbin: Bear hugs

Binnie is so touchy in general but his personal favorite in his artillery, are huge hugs. Whenever you guys go out on a date, he'll wrap his arms around your shoulders and waddle behind you. Even when you watch him at dance practice, during breaks he'll chase you around and hug you (much to your dismay, since he's all sweaty.) He loves encasing you and knowing you're safe with him as much as you love the warmth of his embrace. He'll squeeze you so tightly, honestly to the point of suffocating. Whenever you return the favor, he melts. Feeling your arms around him is the greatest comfort, especially when he's had a really hard day.

Hyunjin: Hand worship

Having hands on the larger side, Hyunjin loves looking and feeling your smaller ones in his own. He'll make fun of you sometimes, calling them baby hands even though they're a normal size but I digress. Sometimes when he paints, he'll turn to you and ask for your hand to hold. You smile at him and give it to him and he'll bring it to his lips before intertwining his fingers with your own. If he's feeling especially playful, he will start to paint on it. Landscapes, flowers, even Jiniret. It feels so intimate when your fingers dance around together, exploring each other.

Han: Kisses

This man has some juicy lips and he is not afraid to use them. He will find any excuse to kiss you. ANY. "Aw, you had a bad day? Here, my lips will cure you." "Oh! You had an amazing day? Let's make it a better one." Before he showers your face and neck and shoulders with kisses. His personal favorite place to kiss you is your forehead. He'll rest his head against yours and find your lips, slowly molding them together. Then, after a dizzying and heart melting kiss, he'll leave a trail of them until he finds his lips on your head. You'll close your eyes, savoring the warmth of his body pressed against yours. One time, his kissed your head for so long it left a hickey on there. When he pulled away and saw the angry purple mark, he collapsed on the floor laughing and you looked at him like he was crazy. Until you found a mirror. And you became the crazy one. He did not kiss your head for a while after that.

Felix: Massages

After a long, exhausting day at work, all you want to do is go home, shower, and cry. Thankfully, your caring boyfriend has better plans. Felix loves doing acts of service. If he knows you're not in high spirits he will take your bags at the door, help you take your shoes off, and run a bath for you while you grab yourself something to drink. You'll walk into the bathroom that's thick with steam and see that the candles on the tub are lit and Felix is hunched over, checking the temperature of the water. He'll help you change out of your clothes and lower you into the tub. He has bought several lotions and oils because he loves massaging you so much. He'll spread it over your shoulders and squeeze softly but firmly. You melt. He will hear your words of approval and feel so giddy that he's helping you and relieving some of your stress. Eventually he will move down to your arms, your legs, your feet. Any part of you he can massage he will. It's as enjoyable for him as it is for you and he loves that he can show his love for you this way.

Seungmin: Spooning

This man is a fiend for cuddles. He will jump at any opportunity to cuddle with you. Whenever he wraps up singing at the recording studio, he will get out of the booth and run to your spot on the couch and pull you into his arms. You try to scold him sometimes, since one or two of the members are usually there, but they don't seem to mind at all. You don't really either. You love feeling his arms around your stomach and your legs tangled together. He will fall asleep sometimes and whenever you'd attempt to get up, his grip tightens and you admit defeat. Don't tell anyone this, but whenever you guys are alone, most of the time he's the little spoon. He loves how you hitch your leg over his hip and have your arm under him (it falls asleep most of the time but you never move or tell him.) He feels safest in your arms.

I.N: Playing with your hair

He discovered how much he loved playing with your hair when you guys were on a picnic date in a field. Your head was in his lap and you were nearly asleep. He was staring down at you and began to stroke your hair and scratch at your scalp. You hummed in approval and it was lights out. After seeing how much peace it brought you, he would always be playing with it. Twirling it between his fingers, asking if he can help apply products, even washing it for you when you guys would shower. He did it for you initially, but then it became his favorite thing in the world. Some days you'd let him tie it into weird styles and with weird hair ties. Some with bows, or beads, or wonky colors. He'd find himself kissing it before bed every night and you could cry at how loved you felt in those moments.

#skz #stray kids #bangchan #bangchan x reader #lee know #lee know x reader #changbin #changbin x reader #hyunjin #hyunjin x reader #han jisung #han jisung x reader #felix #lee felix #felix x reader #seungmin #seungmin x reader #i.n #i.n x reader #ot8 x reader #skz ot8 #stray kids ot8

[popcat69]

Rottmnt boys x youngest sibling!reader who is a sweetheart, but moves super quietly and will just disappear and appear at random (regardless of how illogical it may seem).

WHAT ARE YOU DOING!? HoW dId YoU gEt Up ThErE!?!?

Rottmnt x sibling!reader (PLATONIC!!)

Notes: i'm gonna imagine that reader is like maybe a few months younger than mikey also love this idea <3

Warnings: giving the boys heart attacks

You always just appear out of nowhere

Your poor brothers are always so confused and worried

“Have you guys seen our sibling?”

And you just appear behind him opening a can of soda and Raph just jumps turning around

I feel like it quite difficult to scare donnie he's like almost desensitised to it at this point

It was 3:34 am and you couldn't sleep and donnie was just working in his lab and you just teleported behind him

“What chu doing?” “AHH-”

He put multiple trackers on you after that incident

There are times where mikey would be trying to teach leo and Raph how to properly cook without burning down the kitchen

You and donnie were just there for the show

Power duo for real

I headcanon that leo is pretty much an insomniac

He's walking into the kitchen at an ungodly hour to get like cola and chips or smoothing like that

Turns to open the fridge and just sees a small pair of legs dangling from the top.

He looks up seeing his little sibling just sitting on the fridge

“I cant get down…” “HOW DID YOU EVEN GET UP THERE?”

Honestly starting to get concerned for you (mans gonna Raph chasm soon)

Raphs always now pestering leo to keep a first aid kit on him now for you

You and mikey together are like an epic duo

Always finding ways to scare the crap out of Raph

You and The guys found a abandoned construction site one time and it basically become your favourite place

When you saw it there were stars in your eyes and you were jumping around excitedly

Thats when they all knew they messed up

One second you where sitting on the floor with them the next your on the highest railing 

“Hey..wheres _____?”

They just start looking around for you frantically. Donnie is still sitting down looking at his phone before looking up

“Found them”

“____!” “OH MI GOSH!!” “GET DOWN!”

They worry so much they might as well start growing grey hair

Their begging you to stop

#rottmnt x reader #rottmnt x you #donatello x reader #donnie x reader #leonardo x reader #rise of the tmnt x reader #tmnt 2018 #tmnt leo x reader #tmnt x reader #tmnt x reader fluff #rottmnt little sibling #rottmnt x little sister reader #siblings #rottmnt mikey #rottmnt #rottmnt leo #rottmnt donatello #rottmnt donnie x reader #rottmnt donnie #rottmnt fanfiction #rottmnt leo x reader #rottmnt leo x y/n #rottmnt leonardo #rottmnt mikey x reader #rottmnt raph #rottmnt x child!reader #rottmnt raph x reader

[wolfiesmoon]

What a fate

Ran x good girl! reader

this is a part 2 to my fic "i can't sleep", dont worry i'm feeding ur families they will no longer starve. apparently people are really into ran considering how many notes that fic of mine got (and who can blame them honestly)

unrelated but i cant believe it took me this long to get into housewife radio by ghost i love the horror vibes because of course i do

You've had a turbulent few days recently. Ever since you agreed to do that stupid dare Ran hasn't left you alone.

He did promise to do so but you didn't think he was actually serious about "making you his". How could you let this happen?

Things turned out completely opposite to what you expected, though. Instead of dragging you to his gang meeting to beat the crap out of you, he's taking you there to threaten his lackeys that if they even so much as lay a finger on his girl (you), they'd feel hell on earth.

You suppose that it's nice that he wants to protect you but you feel extremely out of place and uncomfortable at a gang meeting of all places.

Your parents think you're studying at a library right now. Somehow, you feel like you're commiting a crime.

You also met his brother at that meeting.

It seems being a good-for-nothing delinquent runs in their family. You feel sorry for their parents. If they even have them.

"Wow, I would've never thought the nerd would be your type." Rindou teased Ran. Actually, maybe it was both of you he was teasing.

"She's the one that kissed me first." Ran smirked at you.

"You're the worst. Both of you." you furrowed your brows, not finding either of them amusing in the slightest.

"Your girlfriend hates you, man. Personally I would not put up with that." Rindou seemed disinterested, checking his nails as he said that.

"I am not his girlfriend, either!" you defended yourself but Ran just looked at you like he pitied you and Rindou looked like he didn't believe you.

"Right, okay, if you say so. You two have your lover's quarrel on your own. I'm going elsewhere." Rindou just casually left, leaving you all alone with Ran in an abandoned storage unit. Oh boy.

"Umm, I should get going- ack!" you felt your wrist getting grabbed, preventing you from leaving. There's your only exit up in smoke.

"Leaving so soon? But we haven't even had our fun yet." Ran smiled at you and you honestly felt scared at that moment. Oh no, you shouldn't have yelled back at him so daringly just now. Now he's going to beat the crap out of you and drop you off in front of your parents doorstep as a warning to never mess with his gang again.

He leaned in closer and you braced yourself for the pain, but instead of that you felt his lips on yours.

Kissing...?! Again?! Well, atleast it's better than a punch to the face... You can't believe it's come to a point where you're glad to get kissed by Ran.

But still, does he have to kiss you in the least romantic place possible? Even if you did have feelings for him you'd totally find this moment cringy.

"You suck at kissing." He comments heartily, pulling away.

"I'm not the one who kisses a new girl every day. Maybe I actually have some self-respect." You crossed your arms. He was your first kiss after all.

"Every night is an exaggeration. It's like, every week." You couldn't tell if he was joking or being serious, even if you saw his expression.

"Oh, wow. Glad to know that I'll get cheated on in about 3 days. Way to make your 'girlfriend' hate you less."

"I'll stop for you." He smiled.

"Uh huh, whatever." You rolled your eyes.

Though, his kisses are actually kind of making you.... No, no! Don't fall for that! You can't believe you almost admitted that you'd fall for him if he kissed you more.

.

"How's it going with your new boyfriend, girl?"

"God, do not call him that." You held your forehead in frustration.

"I think he's taken a liking to you." Your friend nudged you, pointing at Ran who was sitting on the other side of the cafeteria and smiling at you as he ate.

"Great." You said sarcastically, immediately looking away when your eyes met.

"See? It ended up well. Now you have a hot bad boy boyfriend." Your friend kinda wished she'd done it instead of daring you.

"Didn't I just... ugh! I don't think my parents would agree with you." You placed your forehead on the table, groaning. "You date him if you want a bad boy so bad. But I hate you for dragging me into this." Your voice was slightly muffled.

"Yeah, we'll see. You'll be the happiest couple ever in like, two months."

You raised your head, looking back at Ran once again. You're in quite the pickle, aren't you? The next thing you know, you'll fall for Haitani Ran.

How scarily exciting.

.

"Hop on." Ran stopped on his bike in front of the library. How he knew you had a study session there today? Don't worry about the details.

Another motorcycle ride... You feel like you barely survived the last one.

"My parents expect me to be home in 10 minutes." You crossed your arms. You weren't lying, either.

"Who cares? Live a little." Ran rolled his eyes playfully. Clearly he isn't going to let you back down.

"I'll do it, but only if you keep it to ten minutes." He was right, backing down isn't your thing. You wonder how much resisting him you could get away with if you weren't special to him.

Special to him... huh.

"Killjoy." He insulted you lightly as you sat down in front of him. Again, neither of you are wearing a helmet. This is the last time you'll let it slide.

"I prefer to not get scolded endlessly." You held onto him tightly because you knew what was coming and didn't want to almost fall off the bike again. He felt proud when you held onto him like that.

Like you're finally his. To be honest, he didn't really care much for you until you kissed him out of nowhere like that. How bold of you, the top-of-the-class rule stickler. But he likes that. And that's why he decided to make you his.

Isn't the fact that he lets you ride on his motorcycle enough to see that?

You felt the wind blowing against your face as you set off. Now that you feel it again, it doesnt feel too bad. It's kind of nice, actually. And Ran is warm, too.

The scenery moves past the two of you and strangely, you feel really calm and at peace. It feels like your parents don't exist in this moment and that you can just... live, and feel the adrenaline of the high speed.

This is so scarily exciting.

"You look relaxed." He said, looking down at you.

"I am. And look at the road, will you?" You scolded him but your voice was still relaxed. You look up at him again.

He actually isn't that bad looking. You kind of understand why some girls would fall for him. You, on the other hand...

Are unfortunately befalling the same fate.

He didn't say anything but you had a feeling he knew you were staring.

"You look like you're in love."

"What?! How would you even know?!" You looked back at the road, hiding your face from him. You can't help but get defensive of such a thing.

God, you hate that he's right.

#˗ˏˋ ★ ♡ 「Wolfie’s other works」 ♡ ★ ˎˊ˗ #tokyo revengers x you #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyorev x reader #tokyorev x you #haitani ran x reader #haitani ran x y/n #ran haitani x you #ran haitani x reader #haitani x reader #ran haitani #tokyo rev x reader #haitani brothers #haitani ran x you #haitani ran #ran fluff #tokyo rev x you #tokyo rev x y/n #ran x you #ran x reader #ran x y/n #x fem reader #fem reader

[sparkelingspectres]

#yall it was so funny. #like he pulled through and my coworker lisa answered the speaker and the guy said he wanted the 2 for 6 spicy fish #and my coworker went over to the computer and *tried* to ring it up like she honestly tried #but the computer updated or something and said that the fish cant be rung up likely bc its a limited time sandwich #so she politely told him that the computer isnt allowing her to punch in the sandwiches so until further notice we cant sell them #and he first started chssing her out bc ig the menu said we were still serving them #but like. we didnt know they had been removed from the system until then so #and we were willing to compromise w/him but he just sped off and flipped is the bird on the way out #but thats not all #so like 2 minutes later he pulled back in and lisa didnt feel like getting another earfull of that dudes shit so i offered to answer it #and the dude was even meaner with me telling me to go f myself multiple times and obv i was at the computer as well #trying everything i could to ring up the fish but it just WOULDN'T let us and at one point the guy even insulted my intelligence #at that point one of my male coworkers jumped on the mic and refused him service due to the verbal abuse he was giving to lisa and i #so the huy pulled up to the window and unbuckled his seatbelt and threatened to fist fight us #eventually we were able to get him to buzz off but like. bruv #you threw that whole ass temper tantrum over TWO FISH SANDWICHES #and again we TRIED to work woth him and see what we could do to help but he just wouldnt hardly let us get a sentance out without #insulting us personally or our work ethic #i actually find the whole situation absolutely hilarious #like you really expect me to be hurt after you told me to go fuck myself over a sandwich? especially since the situation #wasnt even our fault and we made that very clear to him so like. #no fishes? ;(

[thatdeadaquarius]

imagine if reader is given an ancient scripture from around the time humanity founded out how to write and do the alphabet (somehow it was preserved so well that you can still see the words with no issue)

and it's the most heart wrenching, soul crushing, tear inducing, hyperventilating, sanity disappearing angst, misunderstandings, hurt/no comfort, it gets worse but never better, major character death, unrequited love story to have ever existed in teyvat.

and after reader goes through the whole thing, they can barely talk or breathe properly with how much they're crying.

(even better, it was smut not angst and reader is staring ar the scripture, jaw dropped to the floor with shaking hands.)

STOP- I avoid fanfics like that at all costs 😭 id stop reading it after the first angsty event LMAO

Im like... too emotionally affected by fanfics, esp angst ones 💀

Its just, ppl who write closer to my generation or just very psychologically honestly, are like fucking deadly writers. Got my day ruined and shit w/just fanfics 😭

LMAO THE GIF IS JUST YOU ON THE SPOT NOT EVEN HALFWAY THRU-

☆

Sun: Gender Neutral Reader (you/they/them)

Orbit: Short! Headcanons-ish

Stars: my first of the Fontians!! Fontainianes? Fontainains?? u get it

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: sobbing, discussion of vague smut/NSFW book at the end, okay for Teen/Mature audiences, & Trigger Warnings: none known.

no but it’d be hilarious if u got this crazy like hand-width deep tablet for each “page” of the book, like how every novel or info in genshin is like one page at a time 😭

Sumeru and other international academics are literally constantly harassing politely requesting your translation of these and sending them to you in whichever country you’re visiting at the moment

Fontaine was even more complex and pretty in real life than it could ever be in game and i can def see you at like Neuvillette’s office or a nice french fontaine cafe and just WHAM

huge ass tablet bc as much as the fic tortures you, you have to know what the fuck happens to these miserable idiots

Neuvillette, Clorinde, and Lynette are all the type to immediately try and dissuade you from reading it again, bc from their point of view you just pull out this huge old rock and start sobbing quietly about 10 mins into the read every time 😭😭

(unsurprisingly, Neuvillette would even go so far as to get the Marechaussee Phantom to sneakily steal ur most recent tablets of the story to hide them, which sucks for you LMAO)

Freminet, Wriothesley, Navia, Lyney, and Furina,all frantically try to distract you, and also theyre in order of who would be the most dramatic w/it lmao

NO BC I JUST HAD THE THOUGHT-

Ur tears absolutely are top priority to Neuvillette and Furina so when they inevitably find the memories in them (and the traveler too maybe)

of what the story is about, except its like all the feelings and stuff, so like its the best “translation” they get of the book so far, u best believe it rains for a week straight

it started out as a light drizzle, but as Neuvillette “read on” in ur tear’s memories if got worse HAHA

mans is out here trying to convince himself like, “this is a classic tragedy from eons ago, its about a human romance, im definitely unaffected, though im glad i could figure out what ails My Majesty so”

meanwhile the story gets worse and its just like that meme “ohHHhhhHH its got a little kiicckkk”

Neuvillette nearly floods the streets by chapter 5 when the miscommunication happens and then they cant get in contact with each other to fix it lmao

LMAO I JUST HAD A VISIONNN

ur in fontaine and while yes drinks were popular (like obv fonta)

business is rlly booming bc now everyone you know (like the Vision-users or archons Neuvill, etc) all have develop this habit of having a water bottle or drink on them to offer you when u start reading to rehydrate you 😭😭😭

Navia, Clorinde, Neuvillette, Wriothesley, Lyney, Lynette all have a handkerchief on them at all times too 😭😭

Good God-

the moment you translate the now instant Shakespearean-level tragedy classic, it is a known tear-jerker thruout all of Teyvat,

like theres trigger warnings and age limits and shit 💀

◇

on another note,

if its smut,

ur desperately combing thru all the tablets and wall carvings and cave paintings to try and lowkey cover it up LMAO

and its not like a story with a smut scene either, its like what anon said,

just fully like the ao3 tag “Porn What Plot/Porn With Plot”

STOP

not u yanking the tablets out of Neuvillette’s hands when he curiously picks them up one time lmao

(he is now invested in getting these translated too bc of ur reaction lol)

☆

consider supporting me with an iced coffee? :0

Spooky Season! Spooky Season!! Spooky Season!!!

still not dead btw

just got hired at my new job so ive been training and busy!! :)

im a host at Olive Garden lol its weird and kinda hard, my feet hurt a lot and i havent had a full shift yet ;-; its a brand new one so it opens the 23rd

dw that eldritch one shot is still coming btw, just talking with betas and editing it now lol

hope if you read this you have a great upcoming weekend!!

Safe Travels Anon,

💀♒

☆

If you wanna join a taglist, DM me what for! "Pspspsss, please tag me for [All SAGAU posts, Only SAGAU Language AUs, diff fandom, etc.]!"

(If you ever wanna drop, just DM me! "No more taglists/[specifically this AU/fandom] please!")

☆

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi / @fallen-starr / @areaderofbooks / @devilangel657

#hello #its me #reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated #if anyone was reporting my death #ironic bc of my user #<3 cant wait to post that one shot #hope u guys will like it #its the eldritch au 1000+ followers celeb if u remember #sagau #genshin isekai #genshin imagines #genshin sagau #genshin impact #aqua asks #my asks #genshin impact sagau #genshin self aware #genshin x reader #gender neutral reader

[z3rinn]

# #. GROCERY STORE !! pt. 2

a part 2 to my grocery store post !! This time it contains scarabia - diasomania ! ahem- going grocery shopping is usually a mundane task, boring and usual. that is until the twst boys want to join you in your outing. you just hoped nothing would go wrong this time… for once…

Sorry this took so long to get out !! I hope you all enjoy !! ♡

# #. KALIM AL-ASIM

Going grocery shopping with Kailm is definitely an experience. Its basically like bringing a kid to a candy store. He is ogling at everything around him. That's when you realize he's probably never even been to a grocery store-

By the way he's running around and pointing at everything- putting as many things in the cart as possible- (which you would not be able to pay for) you would like to place him in the baby seat of the cart, but alas he can't fit. So you just settle for placing him in the cart instead. Its at times like this you can imagine where Jamil is coming from. But its ok because he's a cutie patootie and i love him w all my heart- Oh! And just know that he finds the ride absolutely delightful.

Kalim tries to take turns with you when riding the cart, pushing you around the store while laughing happily. He walks into aisles youve never even seen before, showing off weird things that are fascinating to the both of you. Like that self washing cup! Or those lava lamps that costs well over 5000 thamarks !! But he could easily pay for them. You never thought grocery shopping could be so fun- and so you can't help but smile back at his amusement, joining along as the two of you ran around target.

9/10 it's a little overwhelming at first, yet going with him just makes you happy beyond words. Plus he pays!

# #. JAMIL VIPER

Jamil is obviously one of the best people to go grocery shopping with. He's a food expert, and he knows exactly what to get and do while there. Plus, he is most likely tagging along with you to get some things for the Scarabian kitchens.

As I said, Jamil's a food expert, and he knows just what to buy and get while out. Like I said in my previous post, Ruggie knows how to haggle with grocery store managers- and I think Jamil does too. He knows what products are the best, yet are also the cheapest, it's not like he's paying with Kalim's money. (Although he did offer to give you his card!) Jamil is also the type to not get distracted while out, so whenever you try to but something you definitely don't need, he'll snap you back in place.

While out with him make sure not to buy any frozen food, as it'll make him think your prefer that over his fresh and healthier food. And he'll give you a judging look due to it. Oh! And he's gonna cling to you the entire time. This is one of the only moments he'll be able to hang out with you without having to worry about any of his duties and Kalim. So don't question it if he holds on to you or if he's pressed up against you the entire time.

10/10, I'd go with him any day of the week. It doesn't even have to be to the grocery store smh.

# #. VIL SCHOENHEIT

Vil is taking you to some fancy ass grocery store. Like whole foods or sprouts, maybe even the mall. Or whatever the twst equivalent is. As if he'll you just go to some random grocery store- And with him- it's not gonna be all fun and games -_-

He immediately takes you to the veggie and fruits section, piling on good enough amounts of spinach, broccoli, tomatoes. He also buys fruit for his homeade smoothies, those will make your skin glow for days afterwards. It's annoying- you just want your chips- but you cant because of the preservatives. You just want some cookies. Yet you cant. Honestly you were this close to just falling to the floor and crying your heart out like a frenchman. "I JUST WANT MY JUNK FOOD" Shopping with him just seems like a chore instead of something fun tbh.

He's right in front of the cart, dropping only the necessities into it. You were this close to running him over the cart if he slapped your hand one more time for trying to reach out to the chips. He gives you a glare, and tries to resist your puppy eyes. With a click of his tounge he eventually does calm down, dropping a bag of Cheshire Chips into the cart. He might allow it if you come over to Pomefiore to do some face masks with him.

5/10. It's like going shopping with a mom or like a weight trainer or smth. You understand why he's doing this of course- But theres no funny business with him. Zero. Sigh. Well he pays at least. I LOVE HIM I SWEAR-

# #. ROOK HUNT

When Rook notices you walking out of the broken down building you were staying in, from the tree right above your house, he obviously offered to accompany you on your endeavor! Even when you told him you were just going to the grocery store a part of him just couldn't help but be overjoyed. Oh how he just loved being out with you!

Rook is notorious for loving the smallest of details- the simplest things in life. So going to a grocery store and seeing all the beautiful people surrounding him- along with the gorgeous displays of food made his heart practically smile. You watch as he holds an apple in his hands, raising it up to the sky with a glorious smile on his face. (You're this close to just walking away-) He's humming in joy as he recites a poem of the luscious, juicy, red apple to you. Very fun !!

Meanwhile- when Rook is not being a hopeless romantic for apples, the huntsman is all fun and games !! He's straight up singing in the store, admiring anything and everything. He watches as you shop for groceries, a smile on his face. Rook lets you sit in the cart whenever you get tired, pushing you across the store while humming to himself lightly. Just don't say you're getting tired while going back. He'll carry you all the way back.

8/10- he's a bit over bearing at times. But its Rook so like what can you say about it? I love Rook yall.

# #. EPEL FELMIER

Epel is tagging along for two very important reasons! Firstly, his family has branched out to stores all across twisted wonderland- and he obviously has to make sure the quality and presentation were absolutely perfect! Secondly, he gets to hang out with you!

Epel makes his way to the fruits aisle first, dragging you along with a bright smile. His excitement is slowly seeping into you, causing you to laugh yourself. The two of you make your way to the fruits section, the both of you gawking and jumping up and down happily. After that little moment its basically a normal shopping spree. He has experience in going out to the grocery store with his family- so he helps out with practically everything!

He tries to show off as much as he can. He'll help out with the water packets, and baskets carrying them if your hands get tired. He will jump up to grab the snacks you need- that might be too high for you reach. Speaking of snacks - Being out with you lets Epel get junk food and snacks that Vil would NEVER allow- so maybe the two of you can sneak them in the middle of the night.

10/10 !! One of the best to go with! He doesn't bother you whatsover and is very helpful. Guys I love Epel so much KDHDVFTSSKS

# #. IDIA SHROUD

Uhhh- your more likely going to a electronics store- and then maybe stopping at the grocery store on the way back. There's NO way Idia would ever go out to a grocery store on his own. Especially if Doordash exists. But if you stop by an electronics store first, and you need a handsome firey head boy to show you around the store. How could he ever refuse??

He felt like a prince, leading you through his castle while showing off all his prized possessions. While in reality he was just walking through Best Buy or something, and was being an unemployed clerk. He probably pays for your electronics- or maybe he says he'll just make them for you! His designs are 100 times better obviously. However on your way out, he doesn't expect you to point out the whole foods or twst version is across the street.

He basically just sticks to you like a shadow while out. The poor dormleader can't help but be scared that people are gonna judge him for being blue all over. That is until you tell him this was your little shojou moment. Walking out in a supermarket together, inspecting what brand of eggs or milk you should get. It's the whole package! Well obviously now he can't complain. But now he might be just a bit too excited to be here.

6/10 Honestly if you needed groceries that badly you could've just asked him to order from online. Doordash is sooo much easier that doing it the plain (and scary) way.

# #. ORTHO SHROUD

Ortho probably tagged along to experience the "real" life. He's seen families on TV before- and he can't help but crave that domestic lifestyle. So when you ask if he wants to tag along- how could he ever refuse?

He's buzzing with excitement! Hovering around the grocery store with stars in his eyes. Usually he orders groceries from the comfort of his brother's dorm- it's a lot easier that way- but going outside is just so fun !! Ortho might even switch to his P.E form, as it'll make it easier for him to walk around the store like you! Although, he does want to try riding in the cart, it's something that everyone wants at least once in their lives- so how could you say no?

He's very helpful too, it's common courtesy since you took him out in the first place. He's able to reach high places and doesn't have trouble carrying the heavy things. Another plus is if your shy (like his brother) he's able to scan the store and find whatever you're looking for- without asking any employees for help! Sweetie pie fr.

10/10. He's one of the best to go with! Plus no complaints here (like his older brother)

# #. MALLEUS DRACONIA

Malleus? Why does he go??? He just wants to hang out with you. And maybe see how human grocery stores are nowadays. But its mainly the first one. Perhaps when the two of you are out on one of your nightly walks- you suddenly remember that, "Oh no! You forgot to get groceries!!" And now you have to take a menacing dragon man out with you.

Like others, Malleus tags along behind you, inspecting the many products and items in the aisles. He asks questions about products he finds interesting, he'll inspect all the different kinds of fruits (dragon fruits especially), and he'll find different products to try out. He'll always ask you for help too, asking if something is good enough to get. Like that tamagotchi in the corner !! He should get a bunch of friends for Roaring Drago...

He's so oblivious and confused it's kind of funny. Just imagine being a little kid and seeing a giant- like a literal GIANT- standing in the ice cream aisle inspecting the icecream sandwiches. Kinda silly ngl. Wait- what this- your phone is buzzing now? Who? Sebek? Wondering where Waka-sama is? Uh oh.

7/10! It's like going out w a kid whose never been to the outside world- but in a fun way. It would be higher if he told Lilia or Sebek he was tagging along tho... hopefully you don't go deaf from sebek yelling !

# #. LILIA VANROUGE

Did you bring him along? No! Of course not! Should you have noticed he was trailing behind you? Yes! But you didn't because he's an old fae that has experience? Right again! Does that excuse you? No. Obviously not. It's a rule by almost everyone in the dorm. Never bring Lilia grocery shopping. But your dumbass still did.

Well as long as he didn't feed you the food it was fine- right? So you'll let him tag along i guess. Lilia is the type to sit in the cart as you drag him around the store, and he only really gets out when he needs something. You guys probably stop by the spices aisle like 10 times- you feel bad for those in diasomania who are eating that mush. He tells you about the stores in Briar Valley and how he would take silver out when he was but a boy.

It's nice to listen to him as he drops another (that's 15) box of noodles into your hands- again, you feel bad for the people who are going to eat this. You guys probably bulk up on food while there- I mean it's totally not like Lilia has a butt load of money from being an old ass general right? And of course hes not gonna spoil you because your the best right? Yeah of course nottt. Just be careful at the end of your trip. As compensation for taking him with you he might offer to make you something.... and it might be a bit rude to say no....

9/10 ! It's nice listening to him talk- but uhm like many before this- you won't make it through his ...amazing... cooking skills.

# #. SILVER

Silver had spent most of his life living with fae and not many humans. Briar Valley doesnt have many grocery stores- instead being filled with various farmer markets and merchant's. Meaning he'd never been to a grocery store!! So obviously you had to invite him.

Silver is straight up just following you. He's wandering silently like a little cat, trailing from behind. He's looking around with a hint of curiosity. The store was very different from Sam’s- bigger and more luminous. It had a certain vibe to it. He liked it though, it was oddly comforting. Silver usually sticks to himself, but you can tell when something is confusing him. Take the dragon fruit for example, when he saw it a slight chuckle escaped his lips. It looked so different compared to the dragons and longs he’d met before. You couldn't help but laugh yourself- It’s fun watching him experience something new.

Silver is a very reliable man, if you ever need any help he won’t hesitate to jump in. He will help with the cart, the heavy groceries, the water jugs that weigh a mountain load. As you all know- Silver gets tired (and omg he's so pretty thats not fair) and wont hestiate to fall alseep on you if he ever gets tired. So easy solution: just put him in the cart and bury him in food. It’s easier to drag him that way. (instead of him sprawling on top of you)

10/10. Love him. I love HIM. HIIIMMMM. I LOVVVEEEEE HIM. RAAAAAAHHHH-

# #. SEBEK ZIGVOLT

There's no way in wonderland Sebek would ever go with you! He has duties to attend to! He has a beautiful, mystical, enchanting prince to protect!! Malleus was of the upmost importance, why would he ever go with a dumb human like you? You didnt matter compared to his leige-- Lilia is making him accompany you.

At first Sebek will grumble to himself, upset he couldn't stay with the majestic Malleus. Yet he soon remembers (you reminded him) that Lilia was the one to tell him to accompany you. So he immediately assumes this is a type of training for him !! Oh and now he's bragging that he got to join you on this trip instead of Silver- oh boy-

Like others, Sebek will help. Uhm. But like- loudly. As he carries the bags he will ask if you notice how strong and capable he is, a smirk on his face. And then he goes on a rant about Malleus. Whenever you need something you can't reach he will help, with a "human" comment on the tip of his tounge. And then he goes on about Malleus. It's kind of funny though not gonna lie- seeking a giant man boasting while getting groceries of all things. Very fun!

3/10. But a nine in my heart. He's so silly. Anyway. GRAAAHHH- I WANNA PULL HIS HAIR OUT (in a loving way !!)

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #kalim al asim #jamil viper #vil schoenheit #rook hunt #epel felmier #idia shroud #ortho shroud #malleus draconia #lilia vanrouge #silver #sebek zigvolt

[satoruhour]

OK but gojo would overuse cheezy lines because it makes reader laugh and roll her eyes, I can see him being so cheesy it hurts

a/n: DARLA U R FEEDING THE INSANITY I HAVE IN REGARDS TO GOJO !!!!!! this is so cutee ty for requesting !!!

yes very correct!!! he likes to find jokes in EVERYTHING i swear he’s so smart relating them to mochi or farts

“did you fart? cause you blew me away.” like…. that is not a romantic pick up line gojo…

hes not ashamed to say how he picked you up with a joke back in high school and all you did was roll your eyes (because he is was pretty annoying to you back then) and walk away

he had even bought your favourite drink to confess but all you did was roll your eyes and walk off… immediately flipping open your phone to text utahime and shoko in a group chat of the three of you

poor dude 😭😭

but you started to fall for him — you’re not too sure how and when, but you’re actually the one who used a lame pick up line to start the rs and not him!!

you were tempted to use his but you thought of something you knew he’d like and you’re almost mumbling it (gojo hears it the first time, like doesn’t he have six eyes? not six ears? smh)

he asks u to repeat it (“i like you very mochi…”) and he’s soooo annoying about it but ceases your misery with a big hug

continues to use it throughout your relationship - has SO many from the top of his head it’s quite a feat ngl

a little more into your relationship he teases you about love @ first sight — “do you believe in it? or should i walk past again?”

you almost slap him with your drink

when you’re going shopping for new clothes for megumi and tsumiki he points to his shirt

“know what this is made of?”

you deadpan, “what.” and the giggles are almost so difficult to hold back on gojo’s end.

“it’s boyfriend material.”

“satoru. you ARE my boyfriend.”

HES SO GOOFY I SWEARRR and he screams excitedly and does jazz hands and says “really?” with a cute, fairly punchable face 😭😭

that was the first time it really sunk in gojo was ur bf cause u bagged the strongest sorcerer? insanity. it made you smile a little, you cant lie

another time you’re teaching history to megumi as part as one of his middle school classes, and gojo shouts from the kitchen

“im studying to become a historian.”

and you almost spit out your drink cause what the fuck was he saying??? wasn’t he 25 and a super popular sorcerer

megumi says “oh no” and you think you know what’s coming. gojo finishes it

“i’m especially interested in finding a date.”

“oh COME ON.” and megumi leaves PLEASEKRNF hes so funny, “come teach me when you two stop flirting” 💀

safe to say megumi failed his history test

he plants these little things a lot, that soon you get accustomed to it or even answer it for him and he’s like whining

“you’re so sweet, baby,” and you know there’s a catch to everything he says

“yeah cause i give you a toothache, right”

“BABEEEEE ….” he attempts to give you the silent treatment for one hour. he lasts five minutes

you think it has something to do with age, maybe, cause the longer you’re with gojo the longer you find yourself liking the stupid lame pick-up lines he uses

like sure rolling eyes and giving him the finger is fun but they make your heart flutter at times and you find that you can’t stifle a smile that well around gojo anymore lolol

one day gojo broke the door off the hinges, honestly you dont know how either, so you head to IKEA

“your eyes are like IKEA, i could get lost in them for hours.” and you’re shoving him with a loud laugh, not really rolling your eyes.

he bombards you with lines as you act as suburban couples in the showrooms, he says something about meatballs and then you two really get lost

shrek movie night: “call me shrek cause i’m head ogre heels are you”

and you’re sputtering pizza all over the living room as you laugh, giving your own line that has you two forgetting about the movie. megumi rolls his eyes and smiles when he sees you two having fun :)

gojo likes your laugh, he likes to make u laugh, and he has a thousand and one more pick up lines to use on you

that night he uses “you’re so beautiful you made me forget my pick up line” and you gush, pushing him away with a shy smile and everything. he kisses you and whispers “i mean it.”

just know you’re fated to this stupid goofy man and his stupid pick up lines for the rest of your life <3

#asks #sukunaphilia #jujutsu kaisen headcanons #jujutsu kaisen gojo #jjk fluff #jjk x reader #jjk smut #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jujutsu kaisen #gojo x reader #gojo fluff #gojo satoru fluff #gojo satoru x reader #gojo satoru #satoru gojo x reader #jjk drabbles #jjk hcs #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk gojo #jjk gojo x reader

[a-certain-romance]

house wife reader pt 3!!! (house wife annon atp)

i wanna expand on shenhe and house wife reader bc i lost my 50/50 for her again

shenhe and housewife reader!!, Shenhe would be troubled to know if her house wife could leave her in an instance. Just so she knows you wont leave her she sometimes bends you over the kitchen counter ripping a hole in her favourite suit to let out her boner to fuck you desperately. She needs to cum in you leave some mark inside you so you get the hint.

She always cums raw inside she always wants your around so if you get an accidentital conception she’ll freak out at first and be confused since are you gonna leave? are you gonna scream at her? But turns out your making a new life with her guess her house wife really is something. she’ll happily learn abt parenting with you just for the slight mistake she caused from her own insecurities

beidou and her house wife reader is really something sometimes you beg along to go into going on the sea trips with her since you cant handle being lonely she reluctantly agrees sometimes but all you can do is sit in her cabin all day

at one point she drank too much and stumbled into the cabin, Full of lust she tears both your clothing off. she first gets you to suck her off getting her already to penetrate your cunt since you both knew how desperate you were for eachother you both just couldnt fuck due to the crew

but i know definetly they can hear that night of intamacy

lets also talk abt the inazuman girls more mainly miko rn

Yae miko is a very busy cunning woman who can only afford to give half of her time to you but that doesnt mean shes highly possesive over you, leaving condoms filled with her cum in your shared bedroom sometimes from how much she wishes she could be there for her house wife or while at night she wants you to rut against her cock and gets hard at the thought of it. All she can do now is rut against your cunt desperatly not trying to wake you up since she knows how hard her house wife works<3

untill she couldnt take it anymore she needed you she needed your tight cunt around her cock

she softly wakes up that night opening your thighs leaving cute bike marks and hickeys with her fangs as a sense of ownership before her buldge from her night suit is finally clear she pulls down her pants down enough for her semi hard cock to appear before slowly inserting the first few inchs

she was intoxicaited and drugged by how good you felt around her cock spasming already to cum inside but she knew she had to make it special she slowly started to join your hips and disattaxh them but honestly she got too desperate and started pouding away till you woke up

“go back to sleep, mommy’s g’nna make you feel real good princess” you knew you couldnt argue with your wife you cook and clean for her everyday and serve her as much as you could

honestly you thought you fsiled as a wife to have theese urges inside of you but turns out your wife was just as desperate as you <3

Dude I lost my 50/50 on her weapon I feel your pain.

Warnings: Smut written by a minor, possessive tendencies (Shenhe, Miko kinda), creampies (Shenhe), mention of pregnancy(Shenhe), power dynamics (Beidou), submission (Beidou), crying (Beidou), blowjob (Beidou), Riding (Beidou), Somno (Miko),

Links to pt1, pt2, & pt3

She’s so out of touch with society that sometimes she’ll get a bit insecure. Wouldn’t you rather want someone who has more knowledge about modern city life? Someone who can treat you to all the things Liyue has to offer? But she doesn’t let these thoughts get the better of her, not when she can do something about it. And that something is you, when she fucks your brains out. Suit be damned, a thin piece of material won’t get in the way of sex. She’s obsessed with the way her cum drips out of you when your pussy gets full of her. She finds it so incredibly hot how you’ve taken so much of her that the only place left for her cum to go is to drip out.

And it’s this same obsession that lead her to this accidental conception. In her time spent with Chongyun, she’s learned a bit or two about taking care of “kids”. And with the help of Cloud Retainer, she’ll try her best to fulfill the responsibilities of a mother.

A small part of her loves it. You’re “ruined” for anyone else. Not that she’s forcing you to stay with her after, but now your lives are intertwined in ways she didn’t anticipate. Her hand holds yours as she pounds away at you during another late night. You’re already carrying her child, so might as well cum inside again.

As much as she loves having you on board, she can’t always protect you from the dangers out at sea. Beidou feels much more comfortable with you safe and sound on land, even though it makes her miss you like crazy. There isn’t much you can do without the proper training needed to be apart of either the Shield or Spear groups so there isn’t a lot to do to pass the hours. There’s drinking of course, and on one of those nights you stop at a few glasses to go back into the cabin.

When she stumbles in with that look in her eye you know what’s about to happen. But here’s the fun part: when she’s drunk, she’s a lot more sensitive. You found this out long before you boarded. And ever since, with Beidou’s consent of course, you use that to your full advantage.

She has the faintest bit of pre-cum leaking out of her cock. You coo at how sensitive she is, aren’t you just so needy? You’ll hold the tip gently in your hand, softly wrapping your hand around it as you guide it towards your mouth. The sound of her whimpers fills your ears as she buckles greedily into you.

“Been waiting so long to have you like this. Damn the crew if they hear us, I need you”

She’s on the verge of tears as you suck her cock almost all the way. Her hand shakily grip the back of your head; weakly helping you bob your head up and down while massaging her balls for leverage. You’re usually the louder once, but when Beidou’s drunk, her breathy moans are hard to conceal.

Her cock will twitch inside your throat. When her eyebrows crease in pleasure and concentration, she paints your throat white with her cum. When you release your mouth from her cock, with a thin string of saliva connecting the two, you replace your mouth with your cunt as you shift to sit on Beidou’s lap.

She tends to sober up quickly after you suck her off, but she’s too overwhelmed to take full control. She’s tends to be the one to dominate and always loves the power trip. When she’s like this for you, she has no qualms over giving the reins to you.

Straddle her and hope there’s no noise complaints the next day.

Miko hates how she can get caught up in her work so easily. It happens a lot more than she would like since there’s always so much to be done. You’re always on her mind however. The image of your tired body cuddled in her arms, or tending to the various chores you assist with, or having your body spread out for her on the sheets. Sometimes in her office she would take her cock out and stroke it until she came. Sure it was a mess to clean up, but she desperately needed the stress relief.

Miko is mindful of your energy. No matter how much she wants it, she doesn’t want to over-exhaust your poor body. And that was how she started to bring up somno with you. You would get your much needed rest, and she would get her much needed release. She’s only settled with grinding but lately she’s been craving more.

Those first few inches felt like heaven. It feels like it’s been so long since she’s had your wet pussy wrapped around her. She was going to make this last. She started slow as she would any other night. A steady pace so your body can get used to the feeling. Her blunt nails dig into your hips as she began to loose control. It’s as if her instincts are being controlled by something else, something primal within her.

She can sense your eyelids flutter open but quietly shushes you before you can say a word. “You’re doing so good, you’re so good for me, princess. Close your eyes and let Mommy use you to get off.” She has big plans for you tonight, too bad you’ll be asleep for most of it.

#genshin impact #genshin x reader #genshin smut #yae miko x reader #yae miko imagines #yae miko smut #yae smut #yae miko x y/n #yae miko x you #shenhe x y/n #shenhe x you #shenhe smut #shenhe x reader #beidou smut #beidou x you #beidou x y/n #beidou x reader #💋

[envy-of-the-apple]

Hello, first of all HAPPY BIRTHDAY !!! I hope you had a happy birthday today !

I recently read your recent fic (The Sun eats the Moon) and the writting was amazing. But I have some question in my mind like :

"After that maybe 'Reader' could take contraception in secret, no ?"

"Is she (or they) gonna end up married to him, and forced to be a housewife or just following him where he goes ?" honestly I think her destiny is tragic no matter the result.

"How did he react to her disappearance, did he tried to find her (honestly my question was why he didn't ask her parents or search where did she goes, but honestly its a good thing that he didn't search) ? And during 10 years, how was to him ?" Maybe the only thing we can say "good" about him is he will only looking toward her and not any women after THAT day...?

And last question, I was wondering what will happen to them after THAT day like I know fr that in the media there will be news, but honestly I think the conclusion is well writting, the fact you first introduce the concept about the Moon and conclued with the detailed about the Moon and how tragic the ending is for them (Moon and 'Reader'). And if you are going to a Geto's it's will also be interesting because he was there to.

Sorry for the long message (eng isn't my first language) and thanks you to read that ! Have a nice day or night !

Thank you!!!!!!All great great great questions! I'll try to answer them as best as I can before giving tooo much away lol:

Why cant Ms.Moon take contraception?

yes Ms.Moon (that's my nickname for the mc now lol) could definitely try to take contraception in secret but I don't think it'll be a good ending if Gojo finds out. In the comments of the fic, many ppl were pointing out that Gojo was intentionally trying to get Ms. Moon pregnant back when they were "dating" buuuut it was sort of an afterthought for him. His logic was 'oh well it doesn't matter either way. you're staying with me regardless' but now that he's seen that Ms.Moon is 100% willing to leave him his next course of action is 'k well can't do that if you have a kid'. It's really not about Ms.Moon having a baby, rather it's insurance that bestie won't just dip again. He cares about you more than any kid you'd make together (awww thats so....sweet???)

Will Gojo force Ms.Moon to get married?

Probably, he's a romantic at heart teehee. But also he loves the attention. Part of the reason he was so effective in "keeping" Ms.Moon (in high school) was largely due to public pressure. Now, where he's basically a celebrity, his obsession with the spotlight has only increased. He's gonna be on talk shows and never shy about your relationship to the press. Gojo will definitely describe your relationship as 'newly reunited highschool sweethearts'. People at work will definitely bombard you for the details, and you were never one to be defiant so you'd probably just mutely agree with him (that's why he loves you so much: you're so agreeable). He'd make sure your wedding is the biggest celebration of the year. And then he'd drag you to Aruba or something for yalls honeymoon:)

Why didn't Gojo try to find Ms. Moon?

He did! When you dipped (graduated early and left for college) he went ballistic. I totally forgot to add this in, but Gojo is a huge reason why Ms.Moon doesn't talk to family anymore/anyone in that town. You didn't even tell your parents what college you were headed off to. I bet Gojo harrassed your family for a bit, because he's Gojo Satoru, but when it's clear you just disappeared I bet he was depressed. As terrible as he was, he did love you. It was also a pride thing for him. No one's ever 'won' against him, and you technically did. He'd greatly underestimated you and you got away. I bet he'd be a little impressed at that. I think in the fic it was greatly implied that he was searching for you buuuut eventually he forgot because he got so busy with his life. He still thought about you, but its was probably more along the lines of 'damn, can't believe i lost that bitch' And then you unceremoniously fell from the sky. Surprising, but he's grateful. It was fate to meet you again or was it? *cackles in omniscient author*

The Aftermath

Yeah, you're not living a normal life after that ever again. You're moving in with him, he's getting that marriage certificate ready bye bye freedom. I don't think he'd lock you up, buuuut having a security detail on you at all times, putting a tracker in your phone, and constantly calling/texting you is pretty close to life in prison right? EVENTUALLY, he'd limit your social network, then not-so-gently encourage you to quit your job. By the end of it, you'll be his little housewife but I think he'd be nice about it. (kind of)

#yandere #x reader #yandere jjk #dark content #dark jjk #dark gojo satoru #gojo satoru #asks #yandere gojo satoru #“The Sun Eats the Moon” Asks #SEM

[toreigh]

CAN I REQUEST SUB! KEN WITH W PRAISE KINK PLEASE 🙏 ur amazing ily

Those eyes | ken!ryan x reader

summary: Set in the real world, you take Ken to the fair for the first time. Having a little too much fun, things get.. A little out of hand in the House Of Mirrors. Need I say more, someone ends up on their knees. Also loosely based off the song Those Eyes- New West. MINORS DNI.

pairings: ken!ryan x reader

word count: 1,719

warnings/notes: SMUT! p in v, cursing, spitting, unprotected sex, creampie, praise kink, oral (m receiving), sub dynamics. ken is obsessed with you, but what’s new?

“Ready?” You said.

“So ready.” He replied smiling.

You took Kens hand leading him to the Ferris Wheel. You had come here last week with Gloria and she showed you everything there is to a fair.

"C'mon you're gonna like this one a lot." You said smiling.

Bringing Ken to the fair made him act like a kid again. He was pointing at what you two should do next, smiling ear to ear. He also said he would win you a pink teddy bear.

You were just admiring the view. Both of the views actually. All the lights down below, and Ken. The perfect taper of his jaw, the way his eyes look. He was all yours.

After getting off you took him to a couple more rides before he insisted on winning you the pink teddy from earlier.

You watched as he scored perfectly, winning it with ease. He handed it to you proudly.

"Thank you, my perfect boy." You praised. His cheeks flushing a bright shade of pink.

"Let's go there's a food you just have to try." You said pulling him in the directions of funnel cakes. Bear in one hand Kens hand in the other.

Once you got it Ken was walking towards a table trying to eat it on the way, and got a little bit of whipped cream on his nose. It made you giggle and when he asked what was up you just took a picture, showing it to him. Causing him to give you the same mark, and you two broke out laughing in the middle of the crowd, and no one else knew why.

Sitting down you fed each other the funnel cake like a couple on their wedding night. You had the most fun possible. By the end of it you were food drunk, and gave this devastating smile. Well honestly he thought everything you did was perfect.

"Cmon there's one more thing we have to try before it closes." You said taking his hand. The House of Mirrors.

Being one of the last people in line you had to use the restroom so you told Ken to wait there of course. He didn't really protest.

He did get a little worried when he had to enter without you, but oh would you be back.

It takes all of five minutes before he's lost though. A few minutes pass by with nothing but his own reflection. Off in the distance Ken hears faint shuffling sounds. Ken can feel his heart rate increasing.

"Kennyy!" You call out knowing he's close. You let out a small giggle as he lets out a relaxing sigh.

Thats when he sees you dressed in that white and pink outfit he couldn't get enough of.

"Stop it" He bites out, as its still only your reflection.

"Are you alone Kenny?" You ask.

"Obviously," He breathes. Trying to pin point your reflection still. He honestly gives up waiting for you to find him.

When he suddenly feels hot breath on his back, sending shivers down his spine. You press your front to his back snaking your arms around his slutty waist.

"Thats such a good boy." You mutter.

He spins around looking down at you ready to respond when you crash your lips to his. He can't get enough of you, his hands finding your waist rubbing up and down. He sucks your bottom lip into his mouth. Your like a drug he cant recover from at this point. He pulls away only for you kiss him again deepening the slutty kiss.

You suck his bottom lip into your mouth, making his cock throb and he suddenly remembers what its like for you to have your hot little mouth around his cock. He moans involuntarily at the sensation.

You can taste the arousal at this point kissing him like its the last thing you'll ever do.

"Wait B just wait," He said sounding on edge. "what if someone catches us, really?" He finishes

"Mmm is someone scared? That's the fun of it Kenny." You said rubbing your bottom lip.

You spin him around to look at himself standing behind him you wrap your arms around him.

"Do you know what I love about The House of Mirrors?" You asked.

"What?" He said meeting your eyes in the mirror.

"I can see how perfect you are," you say creeping your hand lower "from every" your hand grazes over the most masculine part of him. "single, angle." You say squeezing him through his jeans causing him to involuntarily buck into your slight grip.

You slip off his jean jacket, reaching for the hem shirt you look at him for permission, he simply nods for an answer. Breathing heavily though his nose. You undress him slowly earning shivers down his cool skin.

Once he's fully undressed you step back getting a good look at his tanned, toned frame.

"You have to undress to." He said feeling very exposed.

"Well Kenny if you want that, you're gonna have to do it." You say twirling your hair around your finger.

He gives you the same respect. Slowly undressing you.

"Your soaked B." He said looking up at you as he pulls your pink panties down your thighs.

"Only for you, can't help it baby." You say in a seductive tone.

When he's done he stands back up looking down at you.

You give a smile that almost brings him to his knees.

Now it's show time. You kiss him on the lips then under the jawline, slowly creeping lower. Peppering kisses all over. You make sure to take it extra slow on the V-line. Making him let of inpatient whimpers, you know he's not proud of.

Finally wrapping your little hand around the base he lets out a frustrated sigh. You kiss his angry red lip adorning a bead of arousal.

"The perfect fucking cock." You praise looking up at him through your lashes as his cock twitches getting harder at the praise.

You finally let your tongue come out teasing his tip, wrapping your lips around the tip finally. You make sure to set a devastatingly slow pace.

His hips struggle to stay still after a while, you pick up the pace teasing the underside of his head. You see him struggling to hold back and know he's close. His hands find your hair, not to guide you or force you anywhere, but purely because he needs something to hold onto.

Only when you felt him twitch in your mouth did you pull of with a audible pop.

Leaving him whimpering with need and his cock twitching with want.

Right before he spoke you cut him off. "But I want your cum inside me."

"You asked so nicely." He said taking your hand and helping you up.

You turned towards the mirror running the tip through your slick folds. You didn't even need foreplay just him.

He finally pushed in and you both gasped at the feeling. You felt so full, and your warm slick cunt was clenching him so, so good. He started to move slowly.

Starting to move fast you could feel him hitting your G-spot.

"Fucking me, so, good." You moaned out each word punctuated by a thrust. His cheeks always flushed it turned him on, his praisee kink through the roof.

Fluttering around you knees got week as you started to go down to the cool glass floor and he followed.

Then he leaned back, scooting his legs underneath you, and he placed you solidly on his lap. Your knees were arched, sitting on the lower of his stomach as he tucked a hand behind, keeping the other one on your clit.

He stroked you hard now. Four fingers abused your swollen area as he fucked up into you. You started to moan from the sudden stimulation as he watched you with grave interest in the mirror. Your head tilted back onto his shoulder, but no he wanted you to watch.

“Look at yourself while you come. Watch yourself come on my cock.” He said into your ear making you whimper and look up at him.

You felt your tummy tighten and build. It all felt like too much as you started to squirm. That unfamiliar knot unraveled at a speed so intense that stars prickled in your eyes. Everything turned black. Pitch black. So dark that you believed you passed out for seconds.

You came in a way you’d never done before. Your orgasm squirted out. Hips and dick covered in juices. Because he held you down on his dick as you came, he always did.

“Look at you, you’ve made a mess of us.” He said smirking at you, and caressing your boob. You whimpered leaning forward as his dick fell out, he whimpered at the loss of heat.

You turned around pushing him back so his back hit the cool glass. You finally got on top again wasting no time riding him hard. He began to moan he was so close again.

You kissed kiss swollen lips, before pulling back and whispering in his ear.

"C'mon gotta give it to me, that perfect cock always fucking me so good." You said as you felt him get impossibly harder and buck his hips.

"Give it to me my perfect boy." You said sweetly.

You stuck two fingers into his mouth pulling his bottom lip down and spit, and he swallowed it.

You kissed his lips praising him, sliding your tongue in his open mouth. You kissed him until he came inside you feeling warmth pool in your tummy. Kissing him till he couldn't kiss you back head thrown back in pleasure. His big hands slowly lifted you up because he was so sensative.

He helped you get dressed pulling your pink panties back up and using two fingers to push him cum inside. Pulling your shirt over your head he stood kissing your forehead.

After you gave him the same respect pulling his jean jacket on you could see him watching you in the mirror.

"What 'cha looking at." You said giggling.

"I just... cant get enough of you."

#ryan gosling fanfiction #ryan gosling ken #ryan gosling x you #ryan gosling #ken smut #ken and barbie #ken x you #smut #ryan gosling smut #i need him biblically