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starfishthestarfish · 2 years

Text

Late Night Devil [Part 1]

Police Officer! Seonghwa x Gangster!Hongjoong

Summary: "Never in all my life have I met such a hot officer... Makes me doubt if I should give myself up already." Seonghwa's breath hitched at each word, eyes fixated on Hongjoong's fingers while they traveled south, reaching his belt. "May I?" He asked, looking through long lashes to the older boy, a playful glint in his empty eyes and a mischievous grin plastered on his flushed face.

Word count: 3987

Chapter Warnings: NSFW/Minors DNI, drug mentions (as a business), guns, mentions of murder, blood, tiiiiny bit of bloodplay, bit of facefucking, blowjob, cum eating, rough sex, handcuffs, anal fingering, anal play, anal fucking, overstimulation if you squint, idk if I'm forgetting smth, ok bye.

1. TAKE YOUR STUFF @hiimnicki05

2. In other notes, I'm so sorry for taking so long and being inactive. I have the full story written out for this one, so no cutting out this time. (For those who follow First and Last Soulmate :,D)

3. I haven't done any grammar/spelling check so excuse any typos.

4. My Google history looks like I've just shoot someone and now I'm trying to revive them :v

5. I'm sorry if some stuff doesn't make sense, but nothing makes sense in the fiction world, so. :D

6. Couldn't think of any other title, sorry.

7. Last thing, I swear. Sets place during Deja Vu era ig? and I was inspired to write this story after listening to Gunshot by KARD, in case you wanna hear it.

"...looks like the drug business is a lot more profitable than I thought..." Seonghwa broke the silence while sitting down on the bed and taking off his black tie, watching the other boy opening the first aid box the hotel staff had provided him. Hongjoong chuckled lightly.

"Never imagined I'd hear a police officer saying that." Hongjoong scoffed, taking out some gauze pads and a bottle of saline solution. "Less from one who nearly arrested me. Twice."

At the police station, Kim Hongjoong's name was close to the top in the most wanted criminals list. His gang, leaded by him, had established their turf around most of the city, their main business being drug dealing but didn't limit itself to that. Robbing, street races and arms trafficking were some other of their crimes. Not to mention Hongjoong himself took part in various murders as gangs didn't follow the city's rules but their own rules; justice was done by their own hands. But in a city where murder is condemned with murder by law, criminals like him were prosecuted insanely. Seonghwa had previously tried catching him, his neat, perfect plans to corner him failing even if it might've been close. Hongjoong was too smart, he was the leader of his gang for some reason.

It made him majorly frustrated, and maybe that's way he didn't think it twice when he saw Hongjoong that night, even if he tried to motion him to leave back in that dark alley. Obviously, his awareness and tense moves should've alerted the police but instead he stepped right in to try and catch him, aiming his gun at him but failing once again when a bullet from the opposite gang brushed against his chest. After both managed to escape, Hongjoong could've easily shot him down in the spot. Seonghwa had some type of obsession to catch him, and he could get rid of his plans and him easily. But even though Hongjoong had killed before, he only killed when his close friends' or his own life was in danger. Seonghwa was a new officer and he was entertaining, he would let him think he had caught him only to escape so easily. It was like playing an eternal game of the cat chasing the mouse, the police in front of him thinking he was in the winning side. For him, he wasn't any type of threat. So instead of leaving him there with a wound in his chest, he took him back with him with the condition of not saying a word about where were they going AND giving him his own weapon, radio and phone, along with some other stuff that might compromise him.

Seonghwa really thought Hongjoong was stupid enough to take him to his own place if he followed him, maybe that was why he acceded. Maybe he was the only stupid one here for following a criminal who most likely wanted to get rid of him. To his relief and disappointment, Hongjoong took him to a rather expensive hotel room. The place was nearly empty except for the staff due to it being late at night, but it still was incredible how the staff didn't know about Hongjoong, about these criminals; they treated him like some other normal person. They were all oblivious to what happened in the crime world.

"I was just doing my job." Seonghwa answered, his cheeks turning a light shade of pink when the younger one kneeled in between his legs to take off the black vest and begin unbuttoning his black shirt. Hongjoong's eyes swiftly looked at the name tag while doing so. Park Seonghwa. He smiled to himself as he finished exposing the older's chest.

It surely was a very suggestive sight, and he scolded his own mind for imagining such things. Seonghwa tried focusing on something else in the meanwhile, deciding on the orange hair the younger one sported. It looked soft, and it made his hand itch to comb back the short bangs. He jumped slightly at the light sting when Hongjoong tapped the gauze pad carefully against the scratch.

"...it doesn't look as bad as I thought, blood makes it scandalous. I thought you'd need stitches." Hongjoong murmured without looking at him. Seonghwa hummed, trying to stay still as the other one finished. He didn't look at him anymore, wondering instead if the station would track down his phone and if he should tell Hongjoong about it. When he least noticed, Hongjoong finished patching the micropore tape over the bandage. He looked back down, expecting the younger one to get up. Instead, black nails trailed south, grazing the skin in their way.

"Never in all my life have I met such a hot officer..." Hongjoong muttered. "Makes me doubt if I should give myself up already." Seonghwa's breath hitched at each word, eyes fixated on the latter's fingers until they reached his belt. "May I?" Hongjoong asked, looking through long lashes to the older boy, a playful glint in his empty eyes and a mischievous grin plastered on his flushed face. Seonghwa cursed under his breath, unable to resist the offer. He nodded, looking back at the other boy's eyes.

Hongjoong's grin grew bigger as he began unbuckling the belt, fingers fidgeting to undo the buttons and unzip his pants right after. He pulled at the underwear waistband, freeing the elder’s cock to begin stroking it immediately with one hand. He gave an experimental lick right over the sensitive slit, earning a gasp from Seonghwa and making him grip on the edge of the bed from the sudden contact. He moaned, watching as the younger one pushed the tip right into his warm mouth, sucking softly as if it were some candy, resisting the urge to throw his head back to keep on looking at the scene between his legs. Pink lips stretched around his cock as Hongjoong pushed his head down, small hand not big enough to wrap around his length completely as it slowly grew bigger by the minute.

Seonghwa bucked his hips, too desperate from the younger's slow pace. He pushed deep down at once into the other's warm, wet throat, groaning at the feeling and surprised when Hongjoong didn't move away even when he gagged around him. Instead, he sucked harder, swallowing from time to time around his length.

"Shit..." Seonghwa groaned once again, placing one hand over the orange hair to grip slightly, just to hold on to. He nearly whined when Hongjoong pulled his cock out of his mouth, licking his lips and clearing his throat.

"You can set the pace; I like it rough." He told him, referring to the controlled grip Seonghwa kept on his hair.

Fuck, this boy was temptation itself. How did he even end up here after aiming his gun so many times at him? The same criminal he had desperately tried catching the past month was kneeling right in between his legs, blowing him. Destiny's ways were crazy.

Seonghwa didn't waste more time as he gripped harder on the orange hair, pushing his own cock back down the younger's throat. He bucked his hips into the tight heat, groaning at the way his throat continuously tightened around hin each time he gagged.

It didn't take long for that knot to begin appearing, tightening with each time Hongjoong's nose touched the skin below his belly. The younger one just closed his eyes, enjoying the stretch in his throat provided by Seonghwa's cock. Seonghwa was sure that if his mouth wasn't stuffed with cock, he'd be smiling.

"H-Hongjoong..." Seonghwa moaned as a warning, close to his release. He threw his head back, gripping impossibly harder onto the orange hair but movements becoming sloppy. Hongjoong began working his head down instead, sucking once again and twirling his tongue around. With a last gasp and a few thrusts of his hips, Seonghwa released his cum into Hongjoong's throat.

Hongjoong did his best in swallowing the bitter but tasty substance, pulling Seonghwa's still half hard cock out of his mouth to lick the remainings that spilled out of his mouth and onto his lips. Seonghwa let go of his hair while panting, and Hongjoong took the opportunity to stand up and hold a tight grip on his jaw before kissing him.

Seonghwa couldn't help but gasp in surprise at the unexpected action, the younger one's tongue sliding immediately into his mouth within seconds of beginning the kiss. It was sloppy, desperate and messy, addicting at the least which made Seonghwa pull him closer. He could taste the bitter remainings of his seed in Hongjoong's mouth, blushing at the flavor.

Hongjoong's grip softened until he was cupping Seonghwa's face in his hand, pulling him impossibly closer while straddling his lap.

At least half of Seonghwa's senses where gone by now. He still was aware that one of the most wanted criminals was sitting in his lap, devouring his mouth. He didn't know where to set his hands on other than the one on his nape, didn't know if he was allowed to touch. Was it too late to push him off? More importantly, did he want to push him?

He moaned when Hongjoong bit his lower lip, hard. Hard enough to make it hurt, to want to pull away but he still moaned. Within a few seconds, he tasted the metallic flavor of blood. He had actually drawn blood, and fuck, did that turn him on even more. It was as if the last string broke, because his hand dropped from his nape to slip them both down the outline of Hongjoong's curves, not bothering anymore about neither of their statuses. He was just going to enjoy what was happening right now. It's not as if it was going to repeat itself anyways, right?

Hongjoong was the one who pulled pulled away from the kiss first, panting. "...Getting bolder, officer...?" His hands roamed down Seonghwa's exposed chest, just before pushing him without care to lay him down. He stared for a few seconds at the older's new look; lips swollen and red, cheeks flushed down and dark eyes. He smiled and bended over him, attaching his lips onto Seonghwa's neck, nibbling softly at the tanned skin. Seonghwa arched his neck to a side, sighing from time to time and hands sliding lower, down his thighs. He stopped when he felt the leg harness around his left thigh, the one holding his holster. He didn't plan on taking the gun, but he would feel more relieved if the gun was out of the way. When he tried reaching out for the gun's handle to pull it out, he felt Hongjoong's grip around his wrist.

"No, nobody touches my gun. Especially not you." Hongjoong murmured, pressing a kiss against his jawline. He slipped the gun out of its holster and threw it away to the floor. He immediately went back to leaving small, red bites on the other's skin until he was turned over on his back and pinned down. He yelped at the action, eyes widening before relaxing under the officer's soothing touch. He couldn't take his gun anymore anyways, it was way too far from the bed. So instead, he closed his eyes, hands combing back Seonghwa's black hair before gripping on it while Seonghwa went back to kissing him.

The kiss was much shorter this time, Seomghwa pulling away within a few seconds. Hongjoong felt the officer's hands pull at his wrist to untangle his fingers from the black mop of hair, while leaving a trail of wet kisses from his jaw down his throat. He sucked particularly right over the beauty mark on his neck, pushing the younger's hands above his head.

Hongjoong gasped when he heard a click, looking above to see handcuffs around his wrists, locking him to the headboard. Where did he have those? He swore he took them away from him earlier. Seonghwa didn't seem to bother, his hands slipping below Hongjoong's navy blue shirt and travelling around the smooth skin.

"...S-Seonghwa..." Hongjoong looked back at the older boy, a tingle of panic in his voice. Seonghwa lifted up his shirt, bunching it right under his armpits and latching his mouth to one of the hardening nipples, sucking softly. Hongjoong let out a whiny moan, arching his back against the other's mouth and closing his eyes, not really sure about how to catch his attention. Seonghwa sucked harder, long tongue twirling around the sensitive bud. One hand went to roll his other nipple between his index finger and thumb, tugging it from time to time. Hongjoong's moans progressively grew louder, and he tried pulling on the handcuffs to let go and cover himself at the increasing sensitiveness on his chest. He wasn't sure it he felt aroused or scared at the cuffs. He wouldn't mind it being a bed play but he was a wanted criminal and he was successfully handcuffed by a police who he didn't know if he'd arrest him after pleasing himself. "Seonghwa!" He managed to shout in between his moans, trashing a bit from side to side and attempting to close his arms in front of him. Seonghwa halted his actions, looking back at him and humming back in response, lips slick and dark brown eyes blown. Panting, Hongjoong looked up at the cuffs and pulled a bit on them, making the chain jingle. He looked back at Seonghwa, hoping he would get the message and ready to speak if he didn't. Seonghwa in response kissed his chest before looking back at him.

"Trust me..." He mumbled, hands rubbing at his waist to soothe him.

"Trust you?!" That was the only thing Hongjoong could blurt out. That was something he couldn't ask for, Seonghwa was the specific officer who chased him around!

Seonghwa hummed once again, nodding while unbuckling the gangster's belt. "Just like I trusted you to not kill me when I followed you. I won't arrest you."

He had a point; but to be honest, if Hongjoong had been Seonghwa, he wouldn't have followed himself to a hotel in the middle of the night.

"We can go back to being enemies tomorrow." Seonghwa finally sighed upon seeing Hongjoong's hesitating stare. The criminal's eyes looked around for a moment before he let his head fall back on the pillow, closing his eyes. Seonghwa smiled, leaving a peck on Hongjoong's milky white tummy. He finished unbuckling the belt, pulling his pants down along with his underwear while Hongjoong lifted up his hips to ease the action. His cock hit his abdomen, red and hard from previous stimulation.

Now having his whole lower body naked, Seonghwa pushed Hongjoong's thighs up against his chest to gain a better access to his small hole. He came a bit closer, his hole clenching around nothing before spitting over it and watching his saliva slowly being swallowed inside. Hongjoong whimpered at the feeling, and Seonghwa hushed him while pushing in a finger.

"I'll take care of you..." Seonghwa said right before kissing one of his inner thighs. Hongjoong moaned at the stretch, biting his lower lip harshly when Seonghwa slowly pushed in a second finger. He scissored them, opening him up, fingers rubbing against his walls and tugging against his rim while he only gasped and whined helplessly. He arched his back off the bed and was close to screaming when Seonghwa curled his fingers inside of him, finger pads pressing against that sensitive nerve. He writhed on the bed, moaning and unsure if he wanted to get away from the torturing pleasure or try to gain more friction on that area as Seonghwa pushed a third finger inside. He kept on kissing his inner thighs, occasionally leaving some red love bites. The tenderness of his kisses, the rough pace of his fingering; He felt the knot starting to tighten below his stomach and whined, not wanting to cum just yet.

"...N-need... Need you inside..." Hongjoong said in between pants and moans. His body finally relaxed when Seonghwa pulled his fingers out, frustrated too as he climbed down the high he was having.

"Whatever you wish for, pretty boy..." Seonghwa cooed, lining up at his now hard cock against his entrance after pulling his pants further down. Hongjoong blushed hard when he heard the pet name, opening his mouth ready to protest but only a scream came out, back arching off the bed one again and handcuffs jingling from the force he pulled at them. Seonghwa had bottomed out in one go, moaning at the tight feeling. He cursed under his breath, hands gripping on Hongjoong's marked thighs and pushing them against his chest even harder, practically folding him in a half. He kept still for a few seconds, waiting for the younger's reaction. Hongjoong tried steadying his breath as much as he could, whining softly at the sudden stretch despite no movement being done.

Hongjoong finally rolled his hips, signaling the officer to proceed. With the first drag out and harsh thrust back in, Hongjoong gasped as he felt the air being knocked out of his lungs and Seonghwa groaned at how hard was Hongjoong clenching around him. He wasn't even sure he would be able to resist for long, the pleasure being too strong to handle.

After both were able to calm down a bit, he began thrusting at a steady rythm, watching how the criminal under him was reduced to a whining mess, small hands tugging continually at the handcuffs.

Seonghwa fastened the pace, beginning with a ruthless thrusting. His grip tightened around his thighs, his fucking becoming less gentle and more brutal each passing second. The bed shook along with the movement, dragging Hongjoong just a bit upwards with each forward thrust. Moans spilled freely out of Hongjoong's mouth as Seonghwa rubbed his prostate over and over again without care, fastly climbing his high once again. He turned his head from side to side, eyes tightly closed as he felt them water and unable to bear the amount of pleasure as he felt himself clinging at the top of his high.

"W-want to c-come..." Hongjoong whined, and Seonghwa couldn't help but kiss him once again. Sloppy, open-mouthed and messy, moans escaping from time to time in between the tongues intertwining. Seonghwa reached down to hold Hongjoong's cock, hand beginning to stroke it immediately. Hongjoong arched his neck, breaking the kiss as he gasped and moaned out Seonghwa's name, cumming over his own stomach.

It actually surprised Seonghwa when he heard him moan out his name, but it also was what made him go over the edge. He moaned with a few last thrusts, spilling his cum inside him.

They both stayed there for a few minutes, trying to catch their breaths. Seonghwa laid his head over the other's chest, listening to the fast heartbeat slowly calm down.

Hongjoong jingled the handcuffs after a while, eyes opening once again. Seonghwa looked up, understanding the message and took the key from one of his pockets, freeing him.

"...Finally..." Hongjoong said, checking the slight red marks on his wrists from tugging. "I see you're a bit kinky..."

Seonghwa let out a chuckle, holding his wrists softly before kissing both of them. The gangster felt heat creeping over his face again and pulled away his hands, choosing to stare at the ceiling to avoid looking into the officer's gaze.

"...I need to go." Hongjoong murmured, eyes still fixated on the ceiling before closing.

"Don't wanna rest for a while?" Seonghwa asked him, staring back at Hongjoong. He immediately regretted asking that, as if fucking him hadn't been dumb enough. He didn't think too much of it as he became lost in admiring Hongjoong's feautures. Long lashes brushing his cheeks, soft blush, sharp nose and uptilted lips. He wanted to kiss him again but considering Hongjoong pulled his hands away, he wasn't sure he'd let him. After a few seconds, Hongjoong shook his head.

"Rest here with you?" He sighed, opening his eyes. He rolled over to be on top, sealing his lips at the movement inside of him. He felt Seonghwa twitch inside of him too, and he sat upright. "I'm not sleeping here with you. I'm either fucking or leaving, so take your pick."

Seonghwa parked around the same alley he had seen Hongjoong last night. He had low hopes of finding the orange haired boy again, but chances weren't nule. He wasn't supposed to either, but he still wished to see him again.

At the end, after two or three rounds, Hongjoong did leave with a slight limp. Seonghwa offered to leave so he could stay and rest, but Hongjoong insisted that his location was known by him and he wouldn't be able to sleep. And Seonghwa couldn't obviously ask him to take him wherever he needed, Hongjoong was paranoid enough about it. Seonghwa did stay in the hotel two or three hours more after he left, processing everything which had happened. He found out he didn't hate Hongjoong as much as he thought. The intriguing criminal did catch his attention since the first time, but obviously; who's attention couldn't he not attract? Hongjoong was intelligent, sarcastic, liked playing around with the authority for fun and overall, he was just so pretty.

Maybe that's why he found himself wanting to see him once again, he was strangely comfortable and amused by him. So now he was slowly pacing around the area, eyes traveling from one building to another. It didn't take too long to find him.

He suddenly felt a gun pointing against his nape, and he froze, lifting his hands in the air.

"How did you know I was here?" He heard the same voice which had moaned for him the previous night right behind him. He turned around slowly, and he couldn't help but smile when he in fact saw Hongjoong aiming his gun at him.

"I didn't know... I just supposed, but I wasn't sure. I don't wanna arrest you, I swear." Seonghwa tried explaining at him, but Hongjoong only raised an eyebrow.

"The police... doesn't wanna arrest me? Well that's new." He chuckled, tilting his head. "I don't trust you a single bit."

"You trusted me yesterday when I handcuffed you to a hotel bed." Seonghwa smiled before yelping when the muzzle hit his head. "Hongjoong-"

"Don't say my name, and stop bothering me!" Hongjoong whined, pushing the muzzle against the older's forehead and forcing him back to his car. "You're just some stupid officer I managed to fuck, and just cause I was nice or pliant for once doesn't mean I'm going to fucking befriend you." Hongjoong spat out just as Seonghwa's back hit his car's door. "You said it, back to enemies today. Now get your ass back into your car and-"

Hongjoong was interrupted when Seonghwa pushed the gun out of his way and pulled him into a kiss, plump lips pressing against his own. It was just yesterday that they had kissed but Hongjoong felt he was feeling them for the first time again, heavenly taste and addicting tongue. He hesitatingly wrapped his arms around the other's neck, one hand still holding his gun. He didn't notice when they shifted positions, now him being the one against the car's door. When Seonghwa pulled away, a string of saliva still connected their tongues.

"...get in the car..." Seonghwa mumbled before kissing his check, hands rubbing at Hongjoong's waist over his shirt. Hongjoong didn't comply, eyes still closed and breathing panting slightly, and that's when he noticed he'd have to explain himself better. "Let's go to a hotel, yeah...?"

And Hongjoong finally nodded, unable to resist the tempting idea of having the beautiful man over him once again. "...but phone... gun... radio", Hongjoong opened his eyes, licking the remaining of Seonghwa's chapstick off his own lips. "Give them to me."

Masterlist

#ateez #hongjoong #seonghwa #seongjoong #ateez au #ateez seonghwa #ateez smut #ateez hongjoong #park seonghwa #kim hongjoong #atz seonghwa #atz #atz hongjoong

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unohanadaydreams · 3 years

Note

As the name suggests, I'm always thirsty for the Big Guy 😉 I wonder how Kenpachi would react if Ikkaku found a piece of your lingerie in the barracks, but no one knew about your relationship?

The idea of Kenpachi being viewed as sus for fucking a 4th member fuels me so ofc. This got out of hand but I fully blame the energy IkkaYumi brings to anything ever and not myself. Thank you for understanding.

Features: smut (18+) at the mid-point, IkkaYumi being real <3 for the majority of it, and sub!Kenpachi (☆ω☆), also idk maybe some minor angst but like made Seggsy.

Kenpachi Zaraki x f!reader (and IkkaYumi...mostly them tbh.)

Ikkaku slapped the door open with loudest ‘OI’ he could muster. The paper of the door ripped somewhere along the way as it slid open, the wooden frame wobbling as he stepped into the room.

Despite the noise, Yumichika’s hand stayed steadfast as he finished smudging eye shadow on his outer lid. Another ‘OI’ sounded, but no hand shook him or foot kicked at him while Yumichika held a brush to his eye.

Glacial, he finished blending the color until he was satisfied--rinsed the brush--set it to dry. Through the mirror in front of him, Yumichika looked to Ikkaku’s reflection only after admiring his own.

The lacy scrap of undies in Ikkaku’s hand lifted Yumichika’s brow.

“I thought you hated when I wore those,” he said with a sniff, turning to get a better look.

Ikkaku rubbed at his bald head, “yah think that because I do.”

Yumichika gestured for the undies and Ikkaku threw them. “And yet?”

“Yet, I found ‘em anyway!” Ikkaku fell into a wide squat, his hands fisting into the fabric of his uniform over his knees. “In the captain’s office.”

They stared at one another, both settling deeper into their feelings.

“Ikkaku, you must be joking,” Yumichika said, holding the undies against his arm. “This color makes me look positively jaundiced.”

“You think captain gives a shit about color theory?”

Yumichika threw the lacy bit of bullshit at Ikkaku’s face. Smiling when they landed on his dumb, shiny head. “He won’t even let me do his hair, Ikkaku. Your delusion is exhausting me.”

“Then--”

“Yes, Ikkaku. Then, they’re not mine. And they’re someone else’s.”

Ikkaku pulled the undies from his head, squinting at them. “Huh.”

Rising with a flourish, Yumichika let the sleeves of his robe billow behind him as he went for the cabinet to rummage for sake. Possibly a new boyfriend.

He came back after a few gulps, offering Ikkaku the bottle only after giving him a sound kick to the head that sent the man flopping to the side.

“Hey!” Ikkaku steadied himself with one hand and rubbed where he’d been kicked with the other...undies still in hand. “Ya can’t blame me. No one else around here would wear that shit.”

Yumichika gave a flat look. Took another gulp of sake. Sighed heavily as he sank to Ikkaku’s level.

“Which means they belong to someone who would,” Yumichika offered along with the sake. “Someone from a different division.”

“Must be serious,” Ikkaku said, sake dribbling down his chin. “Never found anything in his office...ever.”

Yumichika kissed at the trail of sake and took the bottle back once he’d settled into Ikkaku’s lap. “That means whoever it is will be back. And now we know what to look for.”

Ikkaku grunted, shoving his tongue in Yumichika’s mouth before the man in his lap could swallow his sake, not pulling away until he’d swiped as much alcohol with his tongue as he could.

“That shit ain’t good enough for you, anyway.”

“I know,” Yumichika said softly, tone at odds with him rising to stand, heading for the door.

“O--” A raised hand stalled Ikkaku from pointing to his tightened hamaka.

“Fix my door first, dumbass.”

Ikkaku lowered from his tip-toes, a man afflicted. “No way.”

“I told you,” Yumichika said in a hiss. “Not just from 4th division, but a pencil pusher.”

You looked like the kind who’d scramble to bring an 11th division soldier any impossible request they bullied you for. The quintessential mouse every self-respecting soldier was inclined to paw at.

“Don’t look so fucking smug, Yumi,” Ikkaku grumbled, peeling off the wall and pulling Yumichika back towards the training grounds by the back of the puffed-up peacock’s uniform, right at the lower back. Yumichika had just gotten his fifth pay-back punch in when they hit the gate that separated captain’s estate from training ground.

Theirs might have been the only captain so enamored with battle that he’d moved his quarters as close as the captain general would allow. If it weren’t for the bullshit ‘housing codes and regulations’, Ikkaku was sure the house would’ve been on top of the large rectangle of packed dirt that served as the largest training ground in the entire division.

Once they’d hopped the low wall, more meant to keep Zaraki’s house away from the grounds than to keep his underlings on the grounds away from him, Yumichika fell on the nearest bench to fix his uniform.

“Well now what?” Ikkaku rubbed at his side, knowing he was going to need to stretch soon or the tight knot Yumichika had punched into his side or even a night drowned in sake wouldn’t numb it when he collapsed in his futon.

Yumichika didn’t look up from retying his stiff, decorative obi but his face softened, “Now that we’ve been successfully nosy? I was thinking that new, chic sushi bar near the 1st. The one where all the wait-staff look just as yummy.”

“No I, mean--yeah, we’re definitely going,” Ikkaku said, his previous thought tripping over the vision of pretty smiles from androgynous beauties. “But, what do we do about the captain?”

“Well, I’m not going to say anything, but I also have tact. And grace,” Yumichika shrugged, fluffing the bow of obi.

Ikkaku kicked dirt and tensed forward at the shoulders, like he planned to lunge and attack. “I ain’t no fucking snitch and you know it. Don’tcha?”

Sliding forward, Yumichika massaged at Ikkaku’s tense shoulders, rolling his eyes. “I wasn’t saying you would. Just that you’re tactless. And might on accident--which makes you an idiot, not a snitch.”

“Damn right,” Ikkaku grunted, anything but Yumichika’s agreement sliding off his bald head like water. “Wouldn’t snitch for anything. But what if someone else finds out? Like a captain or something. We can’t kill one of them and--”

“Oh, stop worrying about it,” Yumichika said, interrupting and pulling at Ikkaku’s arm--he was hungry, both for refined food and beauties. “No one who wants to live will chance Kenpachi asking for a fight. Or that Captain Unohana; she seems vicious in a way more of our men should be. Such grace.”

“Yeah, yeah, you’re right,” Ikkaku nodded, letting himself be dragged off for sushi, sake, and sublime wait-staff. Still, there was morale to think about. No hardened warrior of the rukongai wanted to hear their fearless leader had a weakness for...the weak.

There had to be something more to it but Ikkaku wasn’t going to dig more into his captain’s business. He was more than happy to put the shovel down and follow Yumichika, even as the truth sat uncomfortably at the base of his skull.

You were weak in all the ways shinigami measured such things--swordsmanship, spiritual pressure, and kido were subjects you studied more than you practiced, let alone pulled off. But you had enough power to pass school and be sorted into the 4th division ranks, where you excelled.

An aptitude for medical procedure, surgery, and technology was what garnered you not just safety, but respect among your peers.

As for the other divisions? Well, you had some friends in 12th who fully understood your position.

Kenpachi Zaraki? Certainly wasn’t someone who could relate to you.

But, that was fine.

You preferred your men muzzled, anyway.

“Too bad, Cap--tain,” you breathed, stretching his title with your tongue playfully. “I was hoping they’d find out everything.”

Pulling yourself up, one fist over the other, by the leather leash tied taunt around Kenpachi’s neck, you delighted in seeing the muscles there strain to accommodate your weight and the need for breath at the same time.

You pressed your lips against his ear after admiring the rough line of his mouth being forcibly split open by a ball gang, pretty, pink, and yours. “Can’t you go faster?”

His answering grunt was followed by his body pressing into yours quick enough turn your teasing into moans. That’s what you liked most about Kenpachi; he was always striving to be better and exceeding expectation.

it would be effortless for him to put his hands on you without permission or rip out the ball gag, but he didn’t. Even when you met in a grimy bar close to the 11th, too drunk to realize who’s thigh you were toying with, his attention to what you wanted was surprising.

You panted, toes curling as he hit that lovely spot only he ever had, “H-hands on hips.”

So eager, he kneaded from the tops of your thighs to your hips like dough, obviously glad to be rewarded. You were eager too--for the angle. Your hips tilted upward gave him more depth and your fingers tightened on his leash.

There was no need to command for more, because he was giving you his all. And he kept going until your scattered breathing paired with the tight heat he was pounding into you snapped all at once, so intense that your eyes watered.

While you basked in the trembling after shocks, catching your breath, Kenpachi went still.

Until you said, “Sit on floor.”

The bed creaked and rose as he left it, leaving you to collect yourself in peace. When you rose to sit, he was kneeling on the floor, his cock hard and bobbing above his thighs.

You walked to him slow, nails scratching through his rough, black hair as you circled behind him. “Such good work,” you praised, “Just like always.”

Trailing down to the buckle, your fingers made quick of his ball gag, parting it from his teeth gently, and tossing it on the bed.

“What do you want me to reward you with, Kenpachi?” You asked him, only once you’d come to face him, your hand urging his jaw up, his eyes on yours.

“To get off,” he said, shameless.

You hummed, “then do it.”

Frowning, Kenpachi leaned his face into your touch. “I want you to.....please.”

The word ‘please’ was said slow, his eyes leaving yours several times before he said it. You wondered how many people Kenpachi Zaraki had ever asked, for anything. Let alone, with manners.

You kissed his nose, finding the almost demure behavior cute, “Then I will. Lay down.”

He did, his arms behind his head, like he napping under a tree instead of waiting for your hands to give his weeping cock relief.

You took your time, teasing him with sensation by spitting into your hand and giving him light rubs, again and again until his hips lifted off the ground.

The lacy bit of pink undies that stretched tight over his thighs, were yours too. And you peeled them off, throwing them toward the ball gag as his breathing grew heavy in the air.

Perhaps you deserved less teasing, but you couldn’t resist dragging out the fun a touch more, one hand fondling his tightening balls while the other scratched lightly at his inner thighs.

His breathing was catching on groans and audible ‘ah’s that had you biting your lip. Thigh’s clenching, you finally began circling the tip of his cock. Soon, you were giving him his first pump, slick hand trailing his length from tip to base in smooth, steady motions.

Straddling his thighs, you took advantage of the position and put both your hands to work, gripping him harder but keeping the same pace.

“Look how hard you are,” you cooed, hands pausing as your thumb circled the slit topping the bulbous head of his cock. “Do you want to cum for me?”

His, “yes,” was immediately pushed from his heaving chest. You hummed, so tempted to climb on top of him fully. But, that would be a kind of weakness you didn’t allow yourself.

Kenpachi’s lone eye struggled to stay open as you lowered your lips to kiss the tip of him. You rose back up and licked them as he watched, his pre-cum salty as it settled on your tongue.

You couldn’t call him unraveling under your firm, fast touch seeing him at his weakest. But, you were certain it was a kind of vulnerable he seldom experienced. Even his arms had come from behind his head, his fingers flexing around air while he struggled to keep them away from you. His hips began bucking with such strength that you were forced to tighten your thighs around his to keep your place.

Desperate, is what he was. For you to give him what he worked for.

And, you did.

His cock pulsed as you wrung his orgasm out, thick ropes of cum falling over his sweaty stomach and dripping down your hands. His moan was loud, deep, and reverberated through out the room like a cry of victory.

You kept stroking him until he was completely spent, until he made a sound almost like a whine.

“I need--”

He sat up, setting you on the floor before padding to the bathroom, and coming back with a damp cloth. “Here.”

“Thank you,” you said, keeping your eyes on your hands as you willed yourself to calm down. His orgasm had made you want him again, badly. But you had things to do. He had things to do.

What you had with Kenpachi was strange and tenuous. And your smug confidence drained a bit as you cleaned yourself and him, until you were almost unsure.

What now? You’d never even seen his house before this. Always in more public places, where you parted almost immediately after playing with him.

“You want these back,” he asked, lifting the ball gag and undies in one hand while pulling back the blankets on the bed with the other. The leash was already on the bedside table, his neck angrily red still.

If you took them, you wondered if it was all over. “No, you should. They’re easy enough to clean.”

“...You sure?”

You nodded, not so attached to a couple cheap props that you’d be wounded if something happened to them. “They’re all yours.”

Shrugging after a moment of silence, he gestured with his head to the bed, “unless you wanna take a shower first.”

“I’m fine for now,” you responded, climbing under the blanket, more confused than obedient. “Are you tired?”

“Enough to sleep.”

The bed dipped from his bulk, forcing you closer. He tossed an arm around you, so you could get comfortable against his side. You lay your head on his chest, eyes still open, listening to him breathe.

At first, you’d thought maybe it was all a joke. That Kenpachi Zaraki was trying to trap you into....something, like those men who feigned nice before using all their muscle to force you to bend as they wanted. To teach you a lesson for trying to dominate him.

You didn’t delude yourself into thinking you had real, tangible power of him or any man you’d toyed with, after all. Just something momentary, like a brief understanding.

But you felt less cautious as your eyes drooped shut and your thoughts circled around his intentions. He always approached you and asked, vague and gruff, ‘here good?’ And you’d find a closet or office or twisty alley that would do.

This time, you asked him. And he took you to his bedroom, compliant as ever, waiting for you to sprinkle nice words in his ear, for you to give him pleasure for being his best.

Drifting off to the rise and fall of his chest, you wondered if things like that meant so much to him.

#this is very lightly edited bc im so short on time lately #but this was fun #kenpachi zaraki smut #kenpachi zaraki x reader #kenpachi zaraki #bleach sm #bleach imagines #bleach scenario #zaraki-oriented #kenpachi: i like being praised and having someone acknowledge me #reader: wait....is this....kind of depressing and not just kinky?#but fr i just think dommed kenpachi is hot and i can not resist sprinkling crumbs of angst

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the-record · 3 years

Text

Headaches and Hospitals

A/N: I love JJ idk why so many people crap on her. And we need more JJ content pleasee

Summary: Who would’ve thought that passing out would lead you to the best decisions you have ever made?

CW: Marriage, pregnancy, hospitals, little mentions of the case. Nothing to serious just lots of fluff.

You felt like crap. Like you just wanted to get back in bed and not get up but you had tons of paperwork to do. You got ready like usual and tried to hide how sick you felt.

“Morning kid.”

“Hey Morgan.” You sat in your chair and rubbed your temples, trying to get rid of you stubborn headache. You pulled out a bottle of ibuprofen and took some with some of your water.

“Hey, babe are you ok?” You looked up to your girlfriend standing next to you.

“It’s just a headache Jayje.” You smiled and kissed the top of your head. “I’m going to go make coffee do you want a cup?” She nodded.

“That would be nice, thank you. Just bring it to my office-nope conference room, we have a case.” You stood up to go get her coffee and felt dizzy. You closed your eyes and held onto your desk to keep steady. “Woah, you ok?”

“Yeah I’m fine. Go get ready I will bring you some coffee.” She did so but was very hesitant about it. You brought her the coffee and sat down in your usual spot.

“Thank you. Cincinnati Ohio, 3 women found in their houses. Women were all choked to death.”

“How do you know they were choked?” Derek questioned. JJ clicked the remote and pictures of the women being choked. You looked away and down at your file. You looked at dead bodies all the time but for some reason, this just made your stomach churn.

“Has Garcia been able to track the pictures and where they came from?” You asked.

“No. They were printed. Someone scanned them to show us.” You nodded.

“No visible tattoos. No marks to define him at all. Wearing gloves so he left no DNA, this guy really thought of everything.”

“This has to be premeditated. He somehow gets into the house without breaking in or scaring them, and then corners them maybe?” Emily pointed out.

“Which is exactly why we have to leave soon. The time is getting shorter between each murder. Wheels up in 30.”

“All of the women look similar to each other. All of them have blonde hair, similar heights, and they are all wearing almost identical dresses. Garcia do any of the victims have a partner?” She clicked her mouse a couple of times.

“Yes. From what it looks Abby was just proposed to, Cheyenne had a long term boyfriend, and Kayla was about to get married.” She sounded so disappointed as he talked.

“So if his long term partner left him, then he was angry. Whoever she is, she was the trigger.” You added.

“Ok, JJ I want you and Y/N to talk to victims families and partners. Emily, Reid and Derek go to the latest crime scene. Me and Rossi will go down to the M.E.’s office.” You moved back to where you and JJ sat before. Your headache slowly was getting worse but you had to ignore it. You had a job to do.

“Y/N, are you ok?” You looked at your girlfriend.

“Baby, I promise I’m fine. I probably just need something to eat. As soon as we land I will grab something ok?”

“Fine, but I don’t want you stressing yourself out to much. You look tired, like you haven’t been sleeping.” She moved into the chair next to yours. “Get some rest, it’s a short ride but a nice nap might help.” You smiled at her. She was always concerned for your well being and never left you alone if she thought something was wrong. She was stubborn but a good person. You rest your head on her shoulder and cuddle up on the chair. She lays her head on yours as you drift to sleep. She was right, you did need some sleep, but the nap was no help. You still had a headache and got dizzy once more while walking in to the cars. She drove both of you to the police department where you met with the families. You started with the latest victim, Kayla’s fiancé Matt.

“Hi Matt. I’m Jennifer Jareau and this is Agent Y/N Y/L/N. We have a couple of questions for you if that’s ok.” He nodded and you sat down next to him.

You spent the next 20 minutes talking to Matt about his fiancée. You felt an overwhelming amount of sadness hearing how he talked about her. She was a insanely good person who took every precaution. After you had finished your questions your thanked him and moved on to the next family. Each of them brought your moods down even more. JJ had been helping you with the questions because she was still new to profiling. You had helped her study and get ready for everything when she was becoming one and it made you so proud. When she came back to the BAU you were so happy because this meant she wouldn’t have to leave for her job anymore.

By the time you had finished your headache was 5 times worse than it was this morning. You closed your eyes and held your head in your hands.

“Not getting any better?” You shook your head. “Why don’t I take you to the hotel?”

“No that’s fine. We have a lot of work to do.”

You spent the rest of your day trying to make up a geological profile with Reid and JJ. Nothing was happening and everything just sucked.

After 6 days of work and 2 more victims, you got a call from someone saying a man broke into her house. You all geared up because he changed is M.O. on the last victim and used a gun. You drove with the Derek and Emily to the house. You 3 went in the front and Hotch, Rossi, and Reid went through the back. Everything was going well until you were about to catch the Unsub. You started to feel dizzy, your vision was fading and suddenly you were falling. Luckily Reid was behind you and noticed you shifting before you fell.

“I swear I am going to murder that girl. I kept telling her to rest and relax for a second but she wouldn’t listen. God she is so stubborn.” You woke up in a hospital from hearing your girlfriends voice.

“Mmm, I learn from the best.” You reached for your girlfriends hand.

“You’re so lucky I love you Y/L/N.”

“I am pretty lucky huh. Come here.” You moved over in the hospital bed and set a place for her to lay down. “Lay down. Don’t be stubborn come here.” She smirked slightly and laid down. She put her arm around you as you rest your head on her chest. She ran her fingers through your hair. “I love you Jennifer Jareau.” You whispered.

“I love you too Y/N Y/L/N.” She kissed the top of your head and you held her hand.

“We should get married.” You looked up at her and smiled. “Right? Jennifer Jareau, I love you so much. I don’t have a ring or anything but, will you marry me?” She pulled you in for a kiss. “I’m taking that as a yes?”

“You bet your ass that’s a yes. On one condition.” You nodded. “You stop fainting in front of unsubs.” You smiled and pulled her in for a sweet kiss. You sat there for a second before she pulled away.

“Sounds like a deal. The moment we land, I am taking you and we are going ring shopping.” She smiled.

“I think that’s a great plan.”

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Your legs felt like jello as you stood at the alter, waiting for JJ to walk down. When you did see her, she was absolutely gorgeous. You wore the jumpsuit the both of you picked out and she wore dress. You couldn’t help but stare at her beauty as she walked down the aisle. “God you’re gorgeous.” You saw her blush at your compliment. She took your hands and Emily started officiating. You weren’t really listening much though, you were too focused on the woman in front of you.

“Jennifer Jareau. When I first met you, all I thought about was how kind and beautiful you were. I knew that you had to be my person. I had to at least be friends with that girl. And luckily I got just that. I’ll be honest, when you met Will I was kind of disappointed. I thought, I wont ever get her, I was too late. But I couldn’t be happier that you met him because now you have Henry. I love that kid so much, he brings so much joy in to everyone’s life. And, Will sorry, when you and Will broke up, I was elated. I knew that I had to take my chance. So I gave you some time to cope with everything before deciding it was now or never. When you said yes to that date, I thought I would cry. When I stayed over the first time, I thought it would be weird with Henry. I thought he wouldn’t want me to stay over. Luckily that kid takes after you. He is kind, and smart, and has terrible eating habits. When he cuddled up to me for the first time I did cry. I cried because your baby trusted me and that’s the most important thing to me. I promise to take care of him everyday and to love him wholeheartedly. Loving you means loving him and I am nothing but prepared to shower him with love and respect. I love you so much Jayje.” You saw a tear roll down her cheek as Henry came up to you. You held him on your hip, both of you placing a kiss on his head before JJ started her vows. Her promise to you.

“Y/N Y/L/N. If you could hear the phone call of me telling Emily you had asked me on a date, it would consist of us both screaming into the phone. The night we went out together I fell in love. I didn’t realize what I had been missing my entire life. I was hesitant to ask you to say over that night because I was worried about how Henry would react, but you were so good to him. You always have been. And whenever I saw you with Henry my heart grew and so did my love for you. You have been nothing but good to me and him and I couldn’t ask for a better person to help me parent my child. You however are so stubborn. Like the most stubborn person I have ever met. You wouldn’t go back to the hotel for one day. You wouldn’t relax for one day and I guess I can’t be mad because if you had, if you had started to feel better that day, we wouldn’t be here in this moment. We aren’t the most typical couple but I couldn’t ask for someone better. Thank you for everything you have done for me and Henry. We both love you some much.”

“By the power of your love and commitment, and the power vested in me, I now pronounce you wives! You may now kiss the bride.” You didn’t hesitate for a second as she pulled you into a kiss.

You smiled at your new wife sitting in front of you, taking in her beauty when you heard Emily tapping her glass. “If I could have everyone’s attention. Hi, I’m Emily. I met these women around 6 years ago and if I could take back everything and change it, I wouldn’t. When I joined the BAU I met these two women who were extremely clingy and affectionate but only towards each other. When I heard that Y/N had proposed I cried. Like I cried and I think Garcia has proof. The kindest women I had ever met have fallen in love and I was lucky enough to witness it. I was gone for some time and protected by them. They both risked all of their friendships to keep me safe, even if it meant putting themselves in danger. Everyday they save people without fail. If you haven’t met him already, next to JJ, is her son Henry. He wrote something for me to read, so here goes. ‘Dear Y/N. Thank you for making my mama happy. Before she was sad and it made me sad. You made her happy and made me happy.’” You felt the tears start to form in your eyes and called Henry to come sit in your lap. You held him close as Emily continued to read. “‘Thank your for being so nice to me and making me cakes all the time. They are really good. I love you mom.’” When you heard the last thing, the tears started to flow. You held the little boy even closer, whispering ‘I love you too’ in his ear. It was the first time he ever called you his mom. “I think that just perfects the night. I would continue but I cannot top that. Congratulations ladies. We all love you so much.” She raised her glass. “To Y/N and JJ. May they have their happily ever after.” You raised your glasses and clinked them while setting in a sweet kiss.

“Ew!” You laughed and pulled away at Henry’s comment.

“Ok little man.” You grabbed her hand. “May I have this dance?” JJ held your hand and you led her to the dance floor, your arms around her waist and hers around your neck. Her head laid on your chest, underneath your chin, as the both of you swayed. “Thank you.”

She looked at you. “For what?” A smiled grew on your face.

“Everything. Loving me. Trusting me with Henry. Taking care of me. Letting me take care of you. I love you Mrs. Jareau.”

“I love you too Mrs. Jareau.” Everything else was a blur. Everything but her.

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“Can we talk?” You sat her down on the couch.

“Y/N are you ok?” You could see the concern on her face.

“I’m fine. I wanted to ask you something.” She nodded to give you permission to ask the question. “Jayje, I wanna have a baby.” Her face lit up.

“Really?” You nodded and she pulled you into a hug. “Of course.”

That week the both of you did a crazy amount of research. You found a good doctor and made an appointment. A couple months later you were pregnant. You were both ecstatic.

“JJ. We are going to have a baby.”

You had both decided that you wanted to wait to tell the team in case something happened. However it became very hard to do this because your emotions were everywhere. The extra hormones you had to take were wearing off a little at this point but now the hormones you produced during pregnancy were taking over. Your temper was short and you cried all the time. You had morning sickness as well so you were constantly sick. The team thought something was up but didn’t ask what was happening. At 4 months you decided to tell the team because you were starting to show and eventually you wouldn’t be able to hide it. You decided to tell them right before a case.

“Wheels up in 30.”

“Um, before any of your guys go, me and JJ have something to tell you.” Everyone waited around but they looked nervous.

“You guys are still together right? And neither of you are leaving, right?” You smiled at shook your head at Penelope.

“No, well kind of but no we aren’t leaving and yes, we are still together.” You looked at JJ before pulling out a small box and handing it to Hotch. “Will you open this?” He nodded and took the box from you without question. JJ held your hand. He let out a small gasp and smiled.

“What? Hotch, what is it?” Derek questioned. He took the ultrasounds out and placed them on the table. There was an audible gasp before the team looked at you. Penelope was the first to run over.

“Congratulations you two! Wait, who is pregnant?” You looked at your wife and raised you hand slightly.

“Congrats mamas.” Derek came over and hugged the both of you. Then Rossi, Blake, Hotch, and finally Spencer.

“If either of you need anything, just tell me.” You smiled and held your arms out for a hug. He accepted and you felt calm again. You had grown close with Spencer over the years. He was one of your best friends and you couldn’t be more thankful for that. You pulled away but still held his arms in your hands.

“Thank you Spence. Really.” He smiled and congratulated JJ before walking out with the team. You stood behind with JJ. “So what do you say baby? Should we go kick some ass?”

“I don’t think you’ll be doing much ass kicking.” You scoffed at her comment.

“And what is that supposed to mean?” She kissed you softly and whispered her next words on your lips.

“You struggled to put your shoes on this morning.” You stood there stunned as she pulled away and began to go get ready.

“I cannot believe you!” She smirks as she walks away.

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You decided to stop going out on the field at 6 months. Babies sometimes come early, why risk that. Why risk getting hurt on the field. You had everything figured out. You were 8 months getting slowly closer to 9. You would stay and help Garcia during everything. JJ was going to be there during the birth no matter where she was and everything was going to be perfect.

You knocked on Garcia’s office door. “Good morning lovely lady. How is the case going?” You weren’t feeling well that morning so you decided to rest a little after the sitter took Henry to school.

“Good so far I think. You doing ok?” You smiled and nodded.

“Yes. Ready to not be pregnant anymore but I’m ok.” Little did you know, your wish shall soon be granted. “How’s JJ? I was going to call her this morning but didn’t want to interrupt anything.”

“She’s good. She told me to tell you that she loves you. She really does you know. Like, I have never seen anyone love somebody so much.” You smiled.

“I love her too. Well I am with you today.” You pulled the chair you guys had put in her office when you first started staying back from cases. Her office was nice. Busy, but relaxing.

You spent the day with her, and the team at times, trying to figure things out. Henry came for a visit after school as the babysitter had a class she couldn’t miss. He sat in the ‘Batcave’ with you and Garcia playing with some toys she had. The day was long and nothing happened for awhile. Nothing happened until your baby decided to make their big entrance.

You had felt some contractions throughout the day just assuming they were Braxton hicks. You were good about hiding them too, but still Garcia noticed.

“Y/N, are you ok honey?” You smiled at her and nodded.

“Just a contraction. I’m okay.” Her jaw dropped.

“No ma’am. We are getting you to the hospital. Hey Henry? Can you pack up your ruck sack for me? We need to get Y/N somewhere, I think you might get to meet your little sibling today!” Henry instantly smiled and was frantically picking up. He walked next to you as Garcia took you downstairs. You called JJ as soon as you go into the car.

“Hey baby, you ok?” JJ questioned.

“No. I’m not. JJ you need to get on the jet and get down here now.” You yelled. The pain was starting to kick your ass.

“What? Y/N, what’s happening?” Garcia took the phone and put it on speaker.

“Hi JJ, you’re on speaker with Henry in the car. I am driving Y/N to the hospital, she was starting to have contractions and on our way out her water broke.” You heard JJ audibly gasp before hearing her yell at Hotch. She was screaming at him to get her on the jet which calmed you down surprisingly.

She stayed on the phone with you the entire time you drove to the hospital but you hung up when you got there. They got you into a room where you sat with Garcia and Henry until Will came to pick him up. Your labor was long, thankfully, so JJ was there for the birth of your daughter. The first time you held her, neither of you could take you eyes off of her.

“Do you have any name ideas?” JJ asked. You looked up and smiled for a moment before turning back to your daughter.

“I was thinking Rosaline.” You thought back to your wedding night. To your bestfriends speech before she left to go to London.

“Rosaline Emily Jareau.” You smiled and nodded.

“Hi Rosaline. We’re your moms.”

The introductions of your daughter was sweet. Hotch was asked to be her godfather and Emily her godmother. Garcia spoiled her rotten with gifts. Spencer eventually taught her new fun things. Derek taught her how to play softball and JJ taught her soccer. Rossi also spoiled her with love and gifts. When Emily got back she tried to teach her how to weald a gun, that however didn’t last long. Even as the team spilt apart, they all were there for her. You couldn’t ask for a better family.

#Jennifer Jareau #jennifer jareau x reader #jennifer jareau fluff #jennifer jareau fanfiction #spencer reid #aaron hotchner #derek morgan #david rossi #emily prentiss #henry lamontagne #Penelope Garcia #Criminal Minds #Criminal Minds Fanfiction #criminal minds fluff

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malibumiu · 3 years

Text

“Running doesn’t matter. I’ll hunt you down if I have to.”

aka Naejunko angst (?) idk this came from yandere prompt list so yea (Warning: Violence, guns)

enjoy!

“I have to keep running… I have to keep running… get up Makoto come on..” It's the mantra that he had to keep telling himself, he was close! Getting so close! To where? He wasn’t sure! But he knew he had to be close, somewhere! Anywhere! From that god forsaken base! He needed to find the others, surely they would be looking for him! That would mean they should be around the area surely with his luck the others would be able to find him or if his luck was being extra nice maybe he’d find them first!

Though a pain throb quick made him hiss in pain, staggering slightly as he took shelter in a half decrepit hotel lobby. Furniture was both turned and unturned glass and debris everywhere, the light from the maroon sky making it look more eerie than it should be. He quickly ducked down behind the receptionist desk, trying to make himself as small as he could manage, he would have gotten under completely but that would be rather hard when you have two arrows in your back. His entire body felt sore and tired, his wounds from his “executions” not having properly healed yet, he was sure a few of them had tore themselves open again already, he just prayed that there wasn’t a blood trail.

“Calm down Makoto..calm down..” he closed his eyes trying to steady his heart beat and control the trembling throughout his body, “Calm down,” another breath, “She probably has forgotten about you by now. Yeah that's it..” another, “ S-She found a new toy to play with, she has gotten over you..just focus on get out alive-”

Static crackles from above him catching his attention, with minimal pain he shot out from under the desk and found a CB radio, perfect! He quickly clamored up the mic and began fiddling with the dial Maybe it was a call for help?! Or Kyoko, or Byakuya-

“Makotoooo baby~ you're heaven sent you know so why are you SO hellbent on being such a bad boy to me~?”

Makoto dropped the mic slowly backing away from the radio..No...she- she couldn’t have! He already pulled the tracker arrow out from his thigh! How could she-?!

The radio let out static crackle, her voice felt closer; it was like he could still feel her on him, her breath, her perfume, her nails, just her.

“Makaroco babybabybaby~! You know I like a bad boy I do! With their cigarette smoke, motorcycles, bad attitude and all, so cooooool right!? But they also reek of insecurities, blood and cowardice. But you aren’t them baby, no.. you're my sweet little darling my little macarena~. OH! You're just so sugary sweet you probably gave me diabetes! That being said..” His mind felt like it was on autopilot at this point, he didn’t even realize that he had got up and started running again, until he landed on the ground with a thud and looked around, finding glass around him, ah he must have jumped out of a window. At least escaped-

“AS I WAS SAYING-“ With a screech of the sound system outside her voice came over again, “That being said Makoto, you have a weakness.. a big weakness baby and it's that you care entirely too much for people.”

He began to run, he didn’t care, he ignored the pain in his back and throbbing pain all over his body, he didn’t care he just needed to run, he needed to stop hearing her.

“Your- no.. OUR friends after all the shit they put you through you still cared for them, in the last trial you got them out of despair, they didn’t deserve it. Earlier you told them to direct all their anger toward me! The mastermind and in the end you couldn’t bring yourself to even fully hate me, you wanted to help me. How could I say no you babe?” “Babe?” he spat, letting out a dark chuckle, he could feel himself slowing down his limp “Yeah sure.”

“You know Makoto there's a lot I’d do for you, you know? It's SO weird honestly I can hardly believe it myself, a lot of things bore me but not you. You somehow keep my mind entertained, you keep me guessing, predicting! Even when we were in school and dating! But one thing was obvious, you were quite the popular guy herbivore. Those bitches would flock all over you! Both the main and reserve course, they were like leeches, those whores...trying to suck all the kindness out of you, probably hoping you’d knock them up with a kid and tie you down, I- i couldn’t have that we were dating after all! I tried to tell to back the fuck off; the main course girls grew their brains and did until valentines time day that is.. anyway those reserve skanks didn’t listen… so let’s just say.. I thought them a lesson? Oh makoto you should have been there. It was delightfully gross! Blood everywhere! Some remainders of guts Oh-! and one bitch even pissed herself it was fucking hilarious Mako!!”

Makoto could only lean against the wall in horror as the fashionista let out howls of laughter, meanwhile he felt even more guilt swelled in his heart. First his classmates and now some girls he doesn’t even know or remember were dead because of him?!

“That little incident cost me a good outfit and shoes but it was allllll worth it for you baby~. I couldn’t have you taken from me, your mine. MINE. I did soooo much for you Makoto! I marked you, loved you hell I even Killed for you! I was even such a loving girlfriend that I brought you to my base where I treated your injuries, gave you good meals, shelter and new friends! And you still leave me! How could you be so cruel Makoto Naegi?! HOW COULD YOU?!”

Said boy cringed at her cries, he couldn’t truly tell if they were actual tears or crocodile tears but even so it made him want to go and comfort her, hold her close and tell her everything was fine, no Junko- Murukro would probably still love you even after all you did-

“But no matter, I still forgive you. You’re just running because you want to be a cheeky little shit dontcha? You wanna play games huh? That’s ok babe, I like this game cat and mouse, prey vs predator, hide and seek? Tag even, games like these are rather fun especially when the mouse is a cute lil boy like you Makoto~ Oh~! I am ready to pounce ya! Rawr :3!”

It was at this point that Makoto felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up, he looked around, there was no one around except for those of the dead and from what remained of the taller buildings he could see no one so... why did he feel like he was suddenly being watched? Before he knew it he started running again.

“But you should have already known Babe, running away is pointless because in the end Makoto Naegi I’ll always find you.”

Junko smiled as she clicked off the microphone for a moment to line up her shot. She looked in the scope again to make sure that he was there and he was probably because of the limp in his run, that fall in the pit and the swords did a multitude on him. And though it hurt her poor maiden heart to see him like this, it definitely made it easier for her. Normally this would be Izuru’s job but this time however he was waiting a block away with the car to scoop him up before he bled out to death. She checked the barrel of the sniper rifle once more, the upgrades Izuru did the bullets should disable him for a while. She looked back into the scope, lining up the shot once more, laying her finger gently on the trigger while her other hand reached for the mic. She held it close, her eye watching him like a hawk as she watched his sad effort of a run.

“But please remember that I’m doing this because I love you Makoto.”

She pulled the trigger without hesitation and watched as he fell to the ground, wriggling around on the ground in pain as he cradled his knee in agony. Then the strangest thing happened: he stopped, and he...started to crawl?! What the hell?! Why wasn’t staying put like a good boy?! Nononono this wouldn’t do! She knew he was rather stubborn and (she said so herself) unpredictable but now was not the time for that!

She looked back into the scope to line up and take the shot again. Taking the second shot wasn’t hard, especially since he wasn’t as much of a moving target as the first time. She made to pop his other knee or maybe it was his thigh? She wasn’t too sure but she did know it didn’t hit a non vital area so he should be good and he looked to be down for the count finally.

“Kamukuraaaaaaa~” she sung into walkie talkie that was attach to her coat, “Be a dear and go the little rascal will ya~? Mama can’t have her big catch lying on the street once you get him, be sure to come back around and get me too Kk? Gooooood!”

Clicking off she sighed and began to pack up, she knew Makoto would be fine after all she did make sure not him in non-vitals areas but with these new injuries on top of his probably already reopened previous wounds. He would probably be bedridden for a bit, but that would be fine by her, it would only insure that he’s incapable of leaving-leaving her. He didn’t need his friends, his friends clearly had no trouble discarding him in the 5th trial, so why would they need him now? She needed him, not his hope or anything, just him. His optimism, kindness, comfort, warmth and love that's all she wanted. She would be damned if she let anyone take him from her. Didn’t they know? Junko Enoshima always got what she wants no matter the cost. Even if it required bloodshed.

#naejunko #makoto naegi #junko enoshima #fic #danganronpa #prompts

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rosymiel · 3 years

Text

✨how i edit hair (tutorial)✨

this is going to be very long, so i will keep everything under a “read more”!

though i had already made a general editing tutorial, which you can find here, i didn’t go really in-depth into how i draw hair in my edits. so, hopefully this tutorial will give more details on what i do!

also, i will be separating this tutorial into two halves - one being dedicated to how i’d edit clay hair, and the other half being how i edit alpha hair

________________________________________________________

clay hair

okay im regretting how big these screenshots are LMAO anyways, here is just a pic of what the screenshot will look like before editing!!!

just an FYI, in my editing style, how i edit hair doesn’t drastically change the sim’s hair in the screenshot. i do my best to add onto what’s already there!

tips before we start: i’ll be using a hard round pressure size brush with 40% smoothing. because i use a tablet, a brush with pressure size helps to create strands that are “feathered out”. don’t worry, you can still create hair strands if you’re using a mouse, which is what i did for roughly 4 years before i got a tablet. i will give some tips at the end of the tutorial on how you can still make your hair strands “feathered out”!

first, i take the eyedropper tool and pick up the lightest shade that appears in most strands of the hair, usually i go right for bangs/face framing bits.

then, with that color, i’ll go ahead and add strands of hair to parts of the hair that are hit by light the most (don’t worry if you don’t really know much about lighting, once you play around with this you’ll feel like you know what looks right!)

HUGE tip from here on out: make sure your strands go with the flow/curve of the hair! of course, you can add some funky strands to add texture/change stuff up, but for the most part, you’ll want your new strands to go with the flow of the hair!

after i added those lighter parts, i’ll do basically the same step as before, but do the exact opposite. i’ll take the eyedropper tool and pick up a darker shade in the hair

with that new color, i’ll add darker strands to parts of the hair that aren’t hit by light (or not as much as other parts of the hair)

this is what it looks like after i apply those steps to the screenshot! with gameplay pics, i’ll make it incredibly simple and only add a few strands (even less than shown in this screenshot), but you can add however many/however few strands you want!

after those steps, i’ll also go in and maybe add a couple of funky strands (such as the two random strands of hair you can see at the front there)

________________________________________________________

alpha hair

here is the before pic for the alpha section of this tutorial! the steps in this section are very similar to the steps i gave in the clay section, so the steps here won’t be too intense. also please ignore the wonky hairline in the screenshot, i forgot to change it when taking screenshots LMAO

this is almost a repeat of the first two steps of the last section!

use the eyedropper tool to pick up a light shade from the hair, it doesn’t have to necessarily be the lightest shade!

usually i use a 1pt-2pt brush and create a lot of strands of hair, again going with the flow of the section that i’m working on

tips: for editing alpha hair, i’ll use a softer hand than if i were editing clay hair. if you’re using a tablet, using less of a heavy hand helps to make the strands look softer and help to blend in with the rest of the hair. also, i find it better to be really quick when you’re drawing the strands so that they seem more natural!

here’s how the screenshot will look after that! again, you can also throw in a few wonky strands if you want to!

the next step will be taking a darker shade and applying it to strands where i’ll want more depth

here, i’ll be taking the eyedropper tool again but picking up a dark shade in the hair. instead of using the exact color i just picked up, i’ll go over to the color panel and make the color a few shades darker since i’m using a soft hand when drawing the strands.

i don’t really have a general rule for where i’ll draw these darker strands, but usually i make these strands in places where i want to help separate sections of hair more + more towards the roots of the hair (hopefully that makes sense!)

tip: if you’re using a tablet and using the hard round pressure size brush, if you’re adding these darker strands closer to the roots of the hair, i find it better to drawing the strand upwards towards the root rather than at the root and drawing the strand downwards!

i was really dumb and forgot to save the pic of what the screenshot looks like after this so... moving on lol

after adding darker strands to create depth in the hair, i’ll go in and add some more lighter strands to create some highlight

i’ll add a new layer with the overlay blend mode and only use 1pt size with white to make these highlight strands

idk... badabing badaboom? instead of focusing more on the outside of the section that i’m working on, i’ll focus these highlights in the middle of the section

here’s what that should look like! hopefully, you can see after the last two steps that there’s more depth and highlight in the hair!

thank god this is almost done.. thank god. anyways, i’ll finish up editing the hair by throwing in random white hair strands

this is a lot like the last step, but this time this will be on a new layer with the normal blend mode, but using a size 1pt white brush again.

since the hair in the screenshot is white/gray, i’ll throw in more of these white strands than i normally would. with any other color of hair, i’ll usually use these strands more for face framing and the back of the hair, but it really depends on where the light source is.

tip: as opposed to previous steps for the alpha section of this tutorial, i’ll actually use a pretty heavy hand when making these strands so that they stand out more!

badabing badaboom! that’s how the screenshot will look after all of the steps are done! i’ve been working on this for almost two days (not because i think making this tutorial was necessarily hard, i just had other things in my life to take care of, so i couldn’t sit down for a few hours straight to make this)

bonus: if there’s colorful lighting in the screenshot, i would create a new layer with the either the screen blend mode, lighter dodge (add) blend mode, or the lighter color blend mode. it really depends on what you want for the screenshot, so just play around with blend modes! i’ll take a color close to what color the lighting is and basically repeat the same step as highlighting hair, but paying very close attention to where that light source is.

anyways, i’m tired. i hope this tutorial was easy to follow, and i’m very sorry if it wasn’t!!! i’m not always the best at explaining things ♥

#ts4 #sims 4 #ts4 tutorial #sims 4 tutorial #tutorial #ts4 editing tutorial #sims 4 editing tutorial

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jade-marie · 3 years

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What do you think would have made a better season 2 finale? ? . I'll start in a perfect world I would have love for Rio to live his best life with Marcus n Rhea and ghost Beth for good and then Beth goes to therapy because sis needs it , but to keep it semi realistic.. I mean if someone has to die it should have been Boomer not sry or maybe we get a similar storyline that we're getting in s4 where Beth tries to turn in Rio but he finds out and they have this big dramatic fight that doesn't end in attempted murder pls!!! Also hot take but in s3 I would have loved if the pregnancy wasn't a lie i would LIVE for the drama. Lastly, It would've been so interesting if the s4 bar scene was actually genuine on Beth's part and she wasn't setting him up. anyways thoughts???

Once again, sorry this took me like a decade to answer! Just been sooo busy lol.

If we’re going to the backend of S2 I didn’t actually hate Beth or dislike the concept of her being with Rio, in fact it was quite the opposite. I found her annoying, but I still had hop for her character and I still really liked the whole Brio dynamic. So if we were keeping everything the same and just changing the last part of 2.13, I would’ve done one of two things, depending on the type of s3 you want. (btw I’m making this shit up on the spot so bear with me lmao)

1. Boomer makes bail, potentially with a condition that he goes ahead with his planned testimony against Rio and now Beth too. Rio has both boomer and Beth kidnapped and taken to a warehouse NOT HIS LOFT, LIKE A DUMBASS, then tells Beth to clean up her mess. They argue etc, but she shoots Boomer and tells Rio they’re done - she handled her shit and wants nothing more to do with him. Angsty s3, pretty similar to what we got. Beth doesn’t leave crime, per se. She starts her cash business, Rio catches wind of it and wiggles his way in, claims he’s entitled to a licensing fee. Cat and mouse game starts again, maybe some hate sex sprinkled in there.

2. Instead of Rio doing the kidnapping, it’s Turner. He snatches both Beth and Rio, tries to force them to kill each other or maybe just Beth to kill Rio, idk. Anyway, he basically talks about how Rio used Beth and vice versa, how Rio made sure to put everything on her, trying to turn them against each other. But it doesn’t work and eventually, Beth shoots Turner - RIP doll face, you’ll be missed! It’s her first roll in the mud and bby is soooo proud of his girl. He obvs cleans it up and then we get some power couple Bonnie and Clyde shit for s3. Oh, a girl can dream 💔💔💔

Re the fake pregnancy - I hated the storyline. Although... I think, in the moment, it was probably the only thing that would’ve saved her. I genuinely think that is the one time where he would’ve been able to kill her because his anger was so fresh. I can’t think of anything else that would’ve actually stopped him from killing her. I don’t know how I feel about a real pregnancy either, especially if it actually resulted in a child between them, because I think Beth has enough kids to dislike 🤣

Potentially if she was pregnant and miscarried in the time he was gone... maybe… It just feels like a copout, honestly. Like it’s a way to temper his rage, to make him soften towards her before she deserves it.

With the bar conversation, if they would’ve had a confrontation about the shooting, fought it out and moved past it, so that her deal with the Secret Service was a new issue - I wouldn’t have hated it. It’s the fact that she’s setting him up on top of having a hitman and on top of already having tried to kill him. It’s the way these things are just piling up and going unaddressed. So the dynamic no longer has that compelling push and pull, it’s just push push push. But if we’re going with the current storyline, everything else is still in play, nothing has been dealt with; I would’ve liked for that to be a turning point. For that to have been a really genuine, raw, honest, moment. Something that we haven’t seen from her before. No ulterior motive.

And yes, they need to fight. It should’ve already happened, which is really frustrating for me. At this point I’m ready for Mick to lock them in a room like, “you guys can fight, fuck, or kill each other, I don’t care anymore. I’m done with your bullshit”🤣🤣🤣

#good girls nbc #rio good girls #beth boland #brio #asks #anon

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shellku · 3 years

Text

Film Challenge

Okay guys. Finally did it. As requested.

Have you ever left a theater before the movie was over?

Yes. Only once.

If you ever left a theater what was playing: Savages

Craziest (Random) movie you’ve ever seen:

The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy.

“And thanks for all the fish” -Dolphins

Most disturbing film you’ve ever watched:

Crimson Peak

A film you only watched because (Tom Hiddleston ) was in it: Crimson Peak

A minor role (or movie) with a major actor you greatly enjoyed: Sebastian Stan as Jefferson/The Mad Hatter in Once Upon A Time.

A minor role (or movie) with a major actress you greatly enjoyed: Emma Watson as Pauline Fossil in Ballet Shoes

A movie everyone should see at least once: The Princess Bride

A movie you thought everyone has seen but apparently not: Who framed Roger Rabbit?

A movie you’ve tried multiple times to watch but never get through it: Silence if the Lambs

A movie that legitimately surprised you:

Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back. While it came out in 1980 I didn’t see it until much later obviously. I wasn’t even ten when I watched it the first time, I and was genuinely shocked.

Movie that you enjoy, that surprises people you enjoy: Scream (1996)

A movie you associated with Religion and it turns out that tracks: The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe

A movie you watched a lot as a kid but your not sure why exactly you watched it so much:

Hook. (And) The Sandlot.

My first movie that made me question my sexualité: The Priâtes of the Caribbean.

Sections

Anime

First Anime: Fruits Basket. Vampire Knight.

Anime I watched with my (brother): Full Metal Alchemist

Anime I tried to get into and couldn’t: D Gray Man

Anime I was surprised I enjoyed: The Neverland Promise. (And) Soul Eater

Anime I always liked (even when it confused people): Black Butler

Anime that makes me cry: Your lie in April

Anime that I love but now makes me sad too: Sword Art Online

Anime I’m just not into: One Piece

One that was recommended that I enjoyed:

Blue Exorcist

One that was recommended that I was ehh on and did not finish: Attack on Titian

One I probably should watch: Pandora Hearts

One I watched Randomly : Castlevania

One that I did not watch until (college) that everyone seems to have watched: Sailor Moon

Cartoons

Cartoons Everyone should see:

- The Peanuts.

- Garfield.

- Scooby Doo.

- Tom and Jerry.

- Pink Panther.

Cartoon I never liked: Spongebob

Cartoon I hate now: Kiayu? Idk. The one with the bald kid that whines a lot. Ugh.

Cartoon I can make myself ‘watch’ with the (niece/nephews): Paw Patrol

Films you would Recommend:

80s: The Breakfast Club

Book Adaption 80s: The Outsiders

Murder Mystery:Murder on the Oriental Express

Jim Henson pick: Labyrinth

(Suicide) Satire:Heathers

Romance: Titanic

‘Horror’ Movie: The Lost boys

Horror Movie: The Nightmare on Elm Street

Spy Flick: Saint (1997)

Mind trips: The Sixth Sense.(1999) Donnie Darko.

Stephen King: The Dark Tower

Stephen King Miniseries: Rose Red

Studio Ghibli: Howls Moving Castle. Or. Kiki’s Delivery Service.

Action Comedy: Miss Congeniality

Adventure Comedy: Jumanji

‘Dark’ Comedy: The Addams Family

Romantic Comedy: Legally Blonde

Tim Burton

Tim Burton Animated: The Nightmare Before Christmas

Tim Burton Live Action: Edward Scissorhand

Tim Burton Musical: Sweeney Todd

Dreamworks

Favorite Dreamwork’s Film:

Rise of the Guardians (and) How to Train your Dragon

Disney:

Unpopular Recommendations:

The Black Cauldron (and) The Great Mouse Detective

One that is still rather disturbing: Pinocchio

Best Soundtrack (Golden Age): Fantasia

Best Soundtrack (Modern): IDk?!

Classics (Golden) everyone should see at least once: Snow White (and) Bambi.

Wartime Era Pic: The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr.Toad

Silver Age or Bronze Age: Both!!!

Disney Renaissance or Post Renaissance: Both! If I absolutely had to choose though, Renaissance.

Moana or Lilo and Stitch: Lilo and Stitch

Frozen or Tangled: Both

Soul or Monsters Inc: Monsters Inc

Toy Story I and 2/ or/ 3 and 4? Toy Story I and 2.

Underrated: Candleshoe

Disney Holiday:

Live Action Halloween - Hocus Pocus

Live Action Halloween Series- Halloweentown

Animated Halloween- Frakenweenie

Live Action Christmas- Miracle on 34th Street (and) Eloise

Animated Christmas- Mickey’s Once Upon a Christmas, Mickey’s Twice Upon a Christmas, (and) Winnie the Pooh: A very merry Pooh year.

New: The Nutcracker and the Four Realms. (2018)

Disney Reimagined/Live Action:

First that made you rethink the story: Maleficent

Favorite ‘Princess’ Story: Beauty and the Beast

The Surprise: Cruella

The one you worried about but we’re happy with in the end: Lady and the Tramp

The one you worried about but ending up enjoying anyway: Aladdin

The one that was good but you could have done without: The Lion King (which really surprised me!!!I like it but I didn’t love it. Which for me was so strange since I’m a fan of the original and the play.)

The one you had high hopes for and had a mixed reaction too: Mulan. (Ended up really liking it, but I miss Mushu. )

‘Modern’ Shakespeare Adaption:

10 Thing I hate About You (The Taming of the Shrew)

Clueless (Emma)

and

The Lion King Series. (Kid appropriate)

The Lion King: Hamlet

The Lion King 1 1/2: Rosencrantz and Guildenstein

The Lion King 2: Romeo and Juliet

Vampire Pictures:

90s: Interview with a Vampire

2000+: Twilight Series

Tv Series: Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Vampire Action Series: Underworld

Classic: Bram Stoker’s Dracula

Dracula with a Twist: Dracula Untold (2014)

Fun Supernatural Flicks :

Witches: The Craft

Male Witches: The Covenant

Fairytale: Red Riding Hood (2011)

Ghost Hunters: Ghostbusters

Multiple Supernatural: Van Helsing (2014)

Werewolf Romance: Blood and Chocolate

Kid Friendly Live Action: Casper

Kid Friendly Animated: Hotel Transylvania

Supernatural Series:

Multi: Supernatural

Animated: Sabrina The Teenage Witch. (And) Scooby Doo.

Witches: Charmed

Fairytale: Once Upon a Time

Darker Fairytale: Grimm

‘Superhero’ Movies:

90s: Batman. (And) The Crow.

Series: Marvel’s Cinematic Universe

Classic Animated: Batman the animated series

Modern Animated: Harley Quinn

Girl Power: Wonder Woman. (and) Birds of Prey.

Something Different: Deadpool

Younger Audiences/Nostalgia: Teen Titans (animated)

Harry Potter

Favorite Film: Idk. Can’t choose honestly.

Least favorite character portrayal: .. Ginny Weasley?

Someone you loved: (so many..) McGonagall

Someone you loved hating: Bellatrix LeStrange

Someone you just hate: Dolores Umbridge

First time you cried: I cried for Sirius and Remus in Prisoner of Azkaban.

First time you jumped: Snakes or Basilisk. Chamber of Secrets. (I think I was 12?)

Someone who was so spot in acting on you can’t see them as anyone else now: Luna Lovegood

Someone who was so good even if the look wasn’t perfect: Emma Granger as Hermione OR Alan Rickman as Severus Snape.

Someone who’s injury hit you harder than the books: Colin Creevy.

Someone who’s death hit you harder than in the books: None. They hit but not as much as the books.

A scene you found just breathtakingly pretty: Christmas at Hogwarts

A scene you found creepy (even when you knew it was coming): Nagini uses a corpse as a mask.

For any Potter heads. Some things that bothered you about the Harry Potter films:

- Where is Charlie Weasley?

- Where is Peeves?

- Where are Neville’s parents?

- The green/blue/brown eye thing. (This is not against Radcliffe. Some special effects could have fixed this easily)

- HarrY DiD YOu PuT YoUR NaMe IN tHe GoBlET of FIRE?! 🔥

- In Sorcerers Stone, Why did you change the snake at the zoos breed??

- “Voldemort” versus “Voldemor”. The silent t.

- Hermione’s. Yule. Ball. Dress. Color. Blue. Not pink. She specifically changed the color.

- Fluffy. Hagrid’s adorable Cerberus was originally bought from a Greek man. Why change it to Irish? I like Ireland but it was a Greek man due to where Cerberus’s initially came from right???

- Harry’s first Weasley sweater color

- Why does Harry only see his parents in the Mirror of Eirsed? Where’s the rest of the family?

- The Underage magic rules aren’t well explained in the movies making the 3rd year summons even more bonkers sounding

- The Patil Twins Yule Ball Outfits. They could have been soooo beautiful. Like this is the Yule Ball! The Twins would have (in my opinion) much more elaborate traditional Indian styled dress robes?? Idk.

- Love Movie Hermione! But some moments take away from Ron. Like when Ron defended her in the Chamber of Secrets. Hermione didn’t know what the slur “Mudblood” meant in the books. Ron had to explain it.

- Dobby needed more screen time. Some stuff Dobby did went to Neville because so many Neville scenes were cut.

- Where’s all the secrecy from the books when communicating with Sirius- “Snuffles”? Something Harry’s godfather insisted on to keep him safe.

- Snape’s title of “The half-blood Prince” is not explained. Neither is it made clear that Severus was also abused horribly at home throughout his childhood. Also that like Harry Dumbledore did nothing to help Severus when he was a student. (Or maybe Tom Riddle when he grew up in an orphanage. I’m sensing a pattern)

- Dumbledore should have still spelled Harry during Dumbledore death scene. No way would Harry just stand there if given the choice.

- Ron was not quite as ‘dumb’ in the books and a lot of his funny moments were cut from the movie. Which makes his jealousy moments all the more unbecoming. He also comes off a bit more arrogant in the movies. (This is not against R Grint. Who is awesome) The movies gave Ron the short end of the stick.

- Weasley/Malfoy Fued. Who else wanted to see Arthur and Lucius have a fist fight in a bookstore? Exactly.

- Albus Dumbledore isn’t all Sunshine and Daisys. He does some really messed up stuff yet no one ever seems to question this.

- Remus was the last Marauder. Yet his and his wife, Tonk’s, deaths are barley acknowledged.

- Also Teddy. Harry’s Godson.

- Harry’s and Ginnys relationship is not built on. It’s just there. Ugh. Heck Movie Ginny isn’t that great. You don’t know much about her except: She’s the only girl in Ron’s family. She’s the youngest Weasley. She’s obsessed with Harry. She’s a good Quidditch player. She has a temper. She was possessed by Riddle’s Dairy when she was eleven. She’s obsessed with Harry.

- Draco is essentially Harry’s antithesis. Where is he in some critical scenes in the movies?

- Where’s the Luna love???? Harry’s pretty rude to her in some scenes.

- There is no S.P.E.W. And Hermione’s more ruthless side is gone.

- The guys hair in The Goblet of Fire. Get a hair cut. Please.

- Some of Molly’s less than Stellar Moments. (Ex. When she believed rumors about Hermione and so treated he coldly. How horrible she was to Fleur. Ect)

- Fleur. Fleur and Bill still get married but the objections to the wedding aren’t as presented in the movies. Not is Molly’s and Ginny’s extreme dislike of Fleur. Or when Arthur apologizes to Fleur. Or really any of Fleurs best moments. The whole courting process is skipped.

- House Elves. The House Elves of Hogwarts.

- Percy Weasley. The ‘betrayal’. The returned Weasley sweater. Him turning to protect his family and fight for Hogwarts at the last minute. All gone. Which involves being forgiven by the Weasley Twins not an hour before Fred dies.

- The connection of the Black sisters. Specifically Adromeda - mother of Tonks. Who is Sirius cousin. Who married Remus Lupin. Tonks and Remus the parents of Teddy.

- Dean Thomas is pretty much gone.

- Rita Skeeter. Illegal Animagus. Hermione kept her in a jar.

- The movies didn’t allow Radcliffe to be sassy and sarcastic enough. Harry Potter is one of the sassiest boys to ever walk through the halls of Hogwarts!

- Harry didn’t fix his wand in the last movie.

- The history of the Marauders.

- The history explaining why Snape could never be comfortable around and trust Remus Lupin.

#disney #challenge #film #movie #mcu #Batman #2021 #Harry Potter

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sparkie96 · 4 years

Note

Hiya, it's the Parker x Leon anon! For a prompt maybe Parker teaching Leon to cook? Or just Leon looking after Parker because Parker is usually the one to look after him after a hard mission? ♡

(Okay, so Idk if you’ve read the “Resident Evil; Heavenly Island” Mangas, but Parker is in them and gets seriously injured (don’t worry, he lives in them). But this fic takes place after this when Parker comes home to Leon and Leon frets over him.)

Even though he was usually very against anything that made Leon yell and stressed out...this time, Parker couldn’t really avoid the thing that made his boyfriend upset...mainly because Parker was the reason for it.

Kind of.

He had just gotten back from Tortuga Island after aiding and assisting Claire Redfield on an assignment there. While there, he had been attacked and nearly killed by a BOW, but luckily, or rather miraculously, another BOW attacked the original BOW while simultaneously saving his life in the process. He had been unconscious for a while, so he couldn’t remember exactly what had happened, but he had barely gotten out of there and called for back-up and their ride out of there.

“Jesus fucking Christ…” Leon muttered, kneeling partially on the bed and partially between Parker’s legs as he changed the bandages around the man’s middle, “What the fuck were you fighting?”

Parker chuckled sheepishly, but then abruptly stopped and cleared his throat when cold blues met his own, receiving an almost scolding look from the younger, “Ah...sorry...it’s just that...it’s hard to describe.”

Leon sighed and shook his head, “Well...the important thing is that you’re here and still breathing…”

Parker noticed the look Leon had in his eyes, reaching up and cupping the agent’s cheek. The action made Leon freeze in the process, a sweet blush radiating through Leon’s cheeks and the bridge of his nose, painting the flesh a soft pink.

Leon shook his head and nudged at the hand, but not before giving the palm a curt kiss, “Let me finish changing your bandages. Then we’ll get to the cutesy shit.”

Parker gave a nod, “Y’know…” He began, Leon going back to fixing him up, but the raised brows of acknowledgment told Parker that he was still listening, “I kept thinking…”

“Don’t.” Leon cut him off.

“What?” Parker asked.

“Don’t talk like…” Leon began, lips pressing into a firm line as he thought of what to say, “...like what would have happened if you…”

The agent took another deep breath, and Parker could see by his rapid blinking that Leon was fighting back tears that threatened to fall. With another sigh, Leon went quiet once more, focusing on the task at hand without another word. Parker stayed quiet as well, wanting to say something, but not wanting to interrupt Leon.

Once the bandages were replaced, Leon threw out the old ones and got to cleaning up the medical supplies. Parker stayed seated on the end of the bed, watching his love before gently taking Leon’s wrist in his hand. Once again, Leon froze in place.

Parker took that as a sign to gently take the stuff Leon was holding in his hands and put them in the first aid kit. Once the container was closed, Parker pulled Leon into his lap despite the pain, resting his forehead against Leon’s. The Agent hid his eyes behind a curtain of brown locks, but Parker could feel what Leon felt.

“I wasn’t going to say that.” Parker said, picking up on what he was going to say from not too long ago, “I was going to say...that I kept thinking about you and my family the whole time I was unconscious.”

Leon didn’t look up at him, Parker watching as his Adam’s Apple bobbed as he swallowed back his tears, “Oh, yeah?” Leon asked.

Parker nodded, chuckling at the dream replaying in his mind, “I had a dream you and I went to the Luciani Family Reunion and remembered you saying that you had never been to Disney World before. I dreamed that you wore that damned Mickey Mouse hat and we were riding that ride for that snow princess movie.”

That made Leon chuckle in partial disbelief and at the ridiculous mental image, “You know I’m not a huge fan of Frozen.”

Parker nodded with a smile as he held Leon in his arms, “Yeah...but even Olaf can get the strongest of guys to sing along.”

“I fucking hate Olaf.” Leon laughed, finally meeting his eye, “...but I would listen to that little bastard sing a whole musical’s worth of songs if you were there with me. I would sing every fucking note.”

“I know…” Parker agreed, looking into those eyes that he could get lost in for hours, “That’s why I kept fighting my way through.”

“So I would sing along with Olaf?”

“Well, that and I really wanted to get home to you.”

Leon laughed, gently punching his uninjured shoulder, “Well...that too.”

Parker leaned up and gently kissed Leon’s forehead, the agent leaning into the gentle and sweet touch before returning the gesture. They sat there in silence for another moment before Leon finally let down his walls. He revealed that he had been in New York when Parker was away, Chris having recruited him for a mission there. Leon had a couple close calls of his own, but he too fought through it so he could get home to Parker.

“I kind of figured.” Parker admitted, “I knew that running into a wall didn’t cause those kinds of bruisings...or a dislocated shoulder. You’re not that reckless during training or sparring.”

Leon nodded,eyes cast downward, “Yeah...but by the time I got all patched up, I got the call that you were in the ER at the BSAA HQ and...you had already gone through your own hell…”

“That you didn’t want to burden me.” Parker finished for him, Leon nodding in confirmation, “You could have told me. Then I could have a turn to scold you.”

Leon chuckled, Parker watching as the tears of both concern and relief fell from Leon’s eyes, Parker reaching up and wiping them away before they could stain soft cheeks. Parker nudged Leon’s nose with his own, making the agent look up at him once more.

“You and I aren’t going anywhere.” Parker promised, “Not anytime soon. We’re gonna grow old on a farm somewhere. Or in a little house in the suburbs or the mountains if you want. Do all the things we want to do.”

“I know.” Leon agreed half-heartedly, still feeling a bit anxious, but not wanting to worry anymore.

Parker leaned in and Leon met him halfway for kiss. The two sat there, Parker shifting Leon in his lap until Leon’s legs straddled his own and arms wrapping around the lithe waist as the agent deepened the kiss, tongues meeting as Leon cupped his cheeks. The kiss said everything that had been left unsaid and what was implied. It was quiet and they had basked in the peace before eventually parting for air.

“We should probably wait to have sex right now.” Leon chuckled, hands moving to rest on the soldier’s shoulders, “But...we could cuddle so you can rest.”

Parker chuckled at that, “Okay, mio amore...and then after that?”

“You can teach me to make Mama Luciani’s famous gnocchi.” Leon said, looking into his eyes once more, “Deal?”

“Deal.”

#sinday requests #wip day #ParkerLeon #Parker Luciani #Leon S. Kennedy #Post Resident Evil Heavenly Island #Post Resident Evil Vendetta #Send Me Prompts #Send Me Asks

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s-j-ace · 4 years

Text

The Same Question

Chapter Four

Characters: Shuichi Saihara, Ouma Kokichi

Words: 10040

Summary:

After Detective Shuichi Saihara encounters mysterious thief Kokichi Ouma for the first time, a game of cat and mouse ensues as both men ask themselves the same question. Why exactly does the elusive phantom thief do what he does?

This is Chapter Four, Here are Chapters One, Two, and Three

Read on AO3

[Log of Text Messages from Rantarou Amami’s Cellular Device]

From: Me

Hey Miu

I got a friend I’m dropping off in Taipei tomorrow

Could you lend him a room

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

Idk

I’m a busy genius

Is he cute

From: Me

[Image description: A candid photo of Shuichi Saihara sleeping on a seat in Rantarou’s private jet.]

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

Hell fucking yes

From: Me

Awesome!

Thanks for being a good friend Miu

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

From: Me

Also btw

He’s Kaede’s ex

So as a good friend you know he’s off limits right

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

Oh fuck you rich boy

From: Me

Thanks again Miu! --- [Log of Messages sent via Discord to “Dinosaur soccer world Is a Cinematic Epic” from ???’s Cellular Device]

Boss sent an image to the chat

[Image is a screenshot of an image which reads the following:

Draft 1, Uncoded, DO NOT MAIL.

Taka, sweetie, it’s me! Your dear Aunt Sally. I know you think I died in the war, but I just pretended so I wouldn’t have to see your ugly face again.

You know I was robbing a museum the other day and I met the nicest young man. Real sharp and very nice eyelashes. And what a quick learner!

Oh, Sorry! I don’t mean to belittle you Taka, dearie, I know how your mother used to say you worked so hard to compete with the geniuses of the world…

You’ve still got a lot of work to do, I think. It must be that Type A personality of yours, holding you back. I’ve heard there’s a new class for people like you, “How to take the giant metal stick out of your ass 101.”

I can’t wait for the next family reunion! I hear it’s going to be a bomb! I’ll be in the open casket.

See you there,

-DICE

/End Image Description]

Boss: Thoughts, thots?

Jack: Lol “nice eyelashes”

Clubs: It looks good. :)

Rook: Looks fine to me

King: Why is his aunt’s name Sally, isn’t he japanese

Boss: Sally can be a japanese name

Spades: I can’t even say an l sound. It’s impossible for us japanese smh.

Rook: I thought u were lesbian not japanese

Bishop: I’ve seen you speak perfect english

Spades: lol seen

King: seen

Boss: seen

Jack: seen

Rook: seen

Bishop: I meant heard ok

Boss: oh nvm actually i'm going to change it to his grandpa’s name

Boss: his grandpa has a wikipedia page lol

King: if your grandpa has a wikipedia page you deserve to be oppressed

Queen: if you have a grandpa you deserve to be oppressed

Rook: if your wikipedia page has a grandpa you deserve to be oppressed

Bishop: if you have a wikipedia page your grandpa deserves to be oppressed

Spades: if your grandpa has a you wikipedia deserves to be oppressed

Bishop: Also boss no pressure but like could we use a better code this time

Bishop: that detective is getting too close for comfort

Spades: Yeah!! We didn’t even end up getting that rug Heartsie wanted because of him…

Clubs: If we did not send letters about our plans to Interpol, our heists would probably be easier.

Boss: Nah, I like to give the coppers a fighting chance.

Boss: I’m thinking that this time I’ll just translate it into germanic script, do a standard caesar cipher encryption on it and then have every one of those letters correspond to a greek word on the rosetta stone then describe each corresponding hieroglyph visually in haiku verse that’s been poorly translated into traditional chinese.

Boss: That should take me like

Boss: Twenty minutes

Rook: Boss literally I think that you are the most batshit dementor human being on the face of the planet

King: dementor

Jack: Who said he was human

Spades: dementor?

Boss: dementor

Queen: dementor

Bishop: dementor...

Jack: dementor

Rook: …

Rook Changed the Group Chat Name to “Dementor Is Correct, Essentially”

Spades: No its not

Spades: Dementor isn’t a fucking word

Rook: Don’t you remember that movie with the british kid on a broom

Spades: Don’t you remember the dictionary

King Changed the Group Chat Name to “Dumbass Improperly Corrects Error”

Rook: When we get to that fucking tower I’m dropping that giant ball on you

King: Love you too <3

Hearts: Y’all stop texting each other

Hearts: You are literally all in the same hotel room

Hearts: I’m willing to bet you’re all sitting on the same couch too

Queen: Fuck you we’re adorable

Bishop: You can’t make us do anything

Bishop: I’ll never use my voice again, my vow of silence,,,,,

Bishop: I’ll only ever text from now on

Ace: We’re the ones bringing the popcorn bishie...

Hearts: Yeah, do you want some or not

Bishop: Yes ma’am, excuse me ma’am

Queen: You may think you have all the power hearts,,, but I get to choose what movie we pirate tonight,,,,,,

Hearts: What

Hearts: no

Hearts: Boss stop him before he makes us watch cats again

Spades: All queen knows is bitchtorrent, cats 2019, and lie

King: Wait isn’t boss with you?

Hearts: Uh

Hearts: No

Hearts: Should he be?

Hearts: I thought he was in the room with y’all

Jack: Well he’s not here now

Ace: Ow shit

Ace: *Aw

Bishop: Ow shit?

Queen: Ow shittttt

Jack: Ow shit

Spades: Ow shit,,,

Rook: Ow shit...

King: Ow shit…...

Clubs: Ow shit! XD

Hearts: Ow shit

Ace: …

Hearts: Now I’m really worried… he didn’t even respond to roast Ace’s ass

King: yeah, ok, we should look for him

Ace: He has been acting kind of weird lately…

Jack: Really?

Ace: Yeah

Ace: Like

Ace: I don’t really know how to describe it…

Rook: I didn’t notice anything

Rook: he seems like his usual self to me

Bishop: Maybe he’s just avoiding movie night because he needs some space or something

Rook: What, like he’s tired of our company?

Jack: That’s fair

Spades: How so?

Jack: I was gonna steal his blue eyes tonight lmao

Rook: NOT IF I GET IT FIRST

Bishop: Idk maybe he just went to get ice

King: we all know he is a monster who would rather drink his panta lukewarm than put a fucking icecube in it

Rook: Yeah, I saw him boil it once

King: THE MAN BOILS SODA AND YOU THINK HE WOULD LEAVE THE ROOM FOR A FUCKING ICE CUBE

Bishop: Okay chill

King: I am c o n c e r n e d , , , ,

Clubs: Oh no! Don’t worry King! :(

Clubs: Boss is fine! :)

Clubs: I saw him leave a few minutes ago.

Clubs: I think he is just getting the bombs. :)

* * * Several people are typing... --- Kokichi Ouma carefully set the grate of the vent he had used to crawl his way into the Idabashi Labs facility in Taipei, Taiwan back into place. Before he had come through, he had counted how many turns it had taken him to unscrew each of the four bolts so that now he could screw them all back in just the way he had found them. Not because he was worried he’d get caught, but because frankly he was bored. This was more of a fetch quest than a theft, to be honest, as evidenced by the fact that Kokichi had come here alone. Finding jobs for all his cronies to do would take too long and put them in unnecessary trouble. So Kokichi was content to leave them to their movie night.

When he finished turning the screws back into the vent cover, Kokichi realized that was kind of lame. So he unscrewed them and started turning them in accordance with the english A1Z26 code to spell out his organization’s name.

Well, maybe on some level Kokichi didn’t find himself wanting to be at movie night recently. It seemed almost like TV had started to run out of things to amuse him with. Or maybe he was just growing tired of the kinds of movies that they usually watched. Maybe it was his taste maturing or something. Like he was growing up. But that would imply that his interests had shifted to something else, like real life or something, when in reality they had just stagnated.

Actually maybe he did have a new interest in real life? He had been more enthused about heists recently at the very least. He was particularly excited about this next one. Queen had shown him some interior shots of Taipei 101, which was a cool looking skyscraper that had a huge ball inside of it to keep it from falling down during earthquakes. Ace wanted to steal the giant ball, but Kokichi was pretty sure they should leave something that kept a .508 kilometer tall building from falling over inside of the .508 kilometer tall building. So instead they were going to steal every light in and on the tower.

Okay, 4 turns, 9 turns, 3 turns, 5 turns. DICE.

… That was kind of lame too.

He unscrewed them again.

Obviously if they were going to steal every light in and on Taipei 101, they needed to get the power off somehow. Otherwise DICE might burn down the building while detaching them, or worse, they might get electrocuted. So obviously Kokichi wanted to fake a bomb threat where they pretended to steal the giant ball while in reality they were just causing a black out and grabbing every light fixture they could before the power turned back on. He had drawn up some extensive diagrams about the route each DICE member would have to take throughout the tower in order for them to grab every light fixture in under half an hour.

He had been well prepared to draw up the designs for his own EMP-bomb device, but upon a cursory google search he discovered that someone had already invented exactly what he needed. Doctor Miu Iruma, who for some reason owned a company called Idabashi Labs that was located in Taiwan. Kokichi had spent about 15 seconds scanning an article from a website that seemed to be the nerd version of a gossip tabloid. It said something about how Dr. Iruma wore a low cut shirt once or something else stupid, which meant Dr. Idabashi definitely left her the company because of a sex scandal and not because she was the best person for the job who invented the perfect EMP bomb.

Thank you journalism we love it when women are reduced to the way they look instead of what they can accomplish for the benefit of a mischevipus group of roguish clowns.

Anyway, after reading that dickcheese Kokichi failed to follow up on answering any of the questions he had originally about what was up with the labs, like why it was a japanese company run by japanese people was for some reason based in Taiwan. Whoopsie.

Eh, it was probably tax reasons or something lame like that.

Kokichi finished turning the screws again. This time it was 6 turns, 9 turns, 6 turns, 9 turns. Haha, nice.

With that, Kokichi finally stood up from the grate and brushed himself off. He had left his cape at the hideout again (you know, because vents), but other than that he was in full regalia. Straight jacket, gloves, scarf, mask. All pretty dusty from this place’s crawl spaces. Thus the brushing.

He wasn’t very mindful of the dust he was leaving on the floor. The only thing he cared about looking good was his cameo on the security cameras he would let see him on his way out.

According to the blueprints of Idabashi Labs, he was on the main experimental floor right now. Weirdly enough there weren’t any cameras in here, so grabbing the bombs would be a cinch.

Although, looking around it didn’t really look like the kind of lab you’d see on TV. There were no big, bubbling tubes or gargantuan Rube Goldberg machines. There was just one desk in the middle, with a bunch of gadgets and trinkets tucked into shelves all over the room, not all of which seemed all that scientific. Yeah, that book shelf was filled with Astro Boy manga and merch. And over there was a-

Wait, was that a bed in the corner? Was that a person in the bed? Hmm… maybe the blueprints were outdated...

Kokichi stilled himself, listening for any sound of breathing, but he could only hear some faint whirring noises.

Kokichi made a quick deduction that there probably were not bombs in this room. It seemed, at the very least, like more of a personal study or something, maybe even a bedroom. He’d just go back in the vent and do some reconnaissance until he found a room that had some inventions in it. The night was young, after--

Kokichi’s brain froze as his eyes landed on a sharpie lying on the floor in front of him. Almost all of his brain cells immediately shut off, the last one remaining screaming at the top of it’s lungs, I’M GONNA DRAW A DICK ON THAT SLEEPING SUCKER’S FACE.

Inspired, avant garde. For once he would give to the world of art instead of only ever taking from it.

He picked up the sharpie in a seamless, silent motion, making his way over to the side of the bed.

As he got closer, he noticed a thick cord coming from under the covers, connecting to a machine at the bedside.

That gave him pause. Was that a C-pap machine or something? Was this person on life support? If they were on life support they probably had it rough enough without a dick on their face…

Actually for that matter, Kokichi still couldn’t hear any breathing. Jesus, were they already dead? He moved to take off the covers, but his eyes had adjusted to the light and he now realized there weren’t any covers on the bed at all. There was only the humanoid figure.

Wait a second…

Kokichi dropped all caution as he got close enough to take a good look at the thing in the bed. It had a face that looked human enough if you dismissed the lines on its face as weird make up, but even in the dark Kokichi could tell the rest of the thing was entirely made of metal. Well, actually the top half was metal and the bottom half had… cloth pants? Jeans? No, they looked more like uniform pants with metal plating. The chest had some design elements that kind of looked like buttons on a school uniform. Why would a robot be dressed like a school bo-

Oh. This was a sex robot. Kokichi had just gotten so swept up in the novelty of a robot wearing pants that he had forgotten for a moment that people were gross.

“Ew, I almost touched it.” Kokichi muttered to himself.

He decided putting a dick on a sex robot would be too cruel even for him, so he planned to draw a mustache instead.

But before Kokichi could even uncap the pen, something weird happened.

The Robot’s torso began to lift off the bed and it’s jaw unhinged.

“Please Mr. Souda, once more I must request that you do not refer to me as ‘it’” Kokichi forced himself not to startle as the robot began emitting a noise approximating human speech, and lights in its head imitating eyes flickered on. “I’ve explained the concept of robophobia many times prev-”

The sounds stopped when the pupils of the robot’s imitation eyes (which probably had cameras in them… shit) found Kokichi’s masked face.

He mentally prepared to be zapped by whatever sort of fucking lazer cannon this thing had on it, but instead of reacting like a good little robot security gaurd and blasting him to bits, this robot analyzed him a bit longer.

“Oh. You aren’t Miu’s assistant. You’re too short.” The robot squinted at him. Or kind of did? At least? Lines just crossed over the “iris” of its LED display. Maybe it was programmed to imitate human expressions. “... I am sorry,” it said after a moment, “My facial recognition cannot locate your face.”

Fuck yeah, thank you clown mask. Clowns would win the future war against rogue AI or die trying.

Ouma’s reply came out automatically.

“You calling me ugly?”

This seemed to… fluster? The robot?

“W-what? No, I never intended any disrespect!”

It was programmed to stutter too? God that was weird. What would be the purpose of this thing if not some sort of escort android? Why give it such advanced software? Just because you could? No, it had to be a sex robot, right?

“You disrespect me with your lecherous essence, you weird sex robot.”

“I am not a- a sex robot!”

Haha, that got the biggest reaction yet.

“Mhm, sure. Miu sure has a kink for school boys, huh?” Kokichi was really pulling words out of his ass now, but he found himself formulating a new plan along the way.

“What? Miu doesn’t- Wait, how do you know Dr. Iruma? And for that matter, why were you watching me sleep?”

It really seemed more like it had been charging…

Kokichi shrugged. “I was deciding whether or not it would be more funny to draw a dick or a mustache on Miu’s sex robot.” Awww, how honest.

“I told you, I am not-”

Kokichi interrupted him. “And as for how I know Miu...” It was so wild that the robot stopped talking when he started. That’d probably be pretty easy to program, but it was weird to dedicate the effort into making a robot respond to social cues like that. “... well, let’s just say, there’s a reason I know she’s into school boys.”

Kokichi waited just long enough for the robot to take in the fact that Kokichi was the average height of a 12 year old boy.

Then he waited another second for the implication to slip in.

“I’m saying I fucked your mom shitli-”

“I know what you’re saying!” This time the robot interrupted him , which would definitely require a much larger effort on the part of the programmer. The robot squinted again and then made a noise that sounded like a huff of frustration. “Why can’t I see you?”

Ok, seeds of suspicion time.

“I don’t know how robot eyes work dude. Maybe someone programmed them wrong.”

“My eyes work just as well as anyone’s!”

“Well, I guess they should, shouldn’t they? If there’s something wrong with your eyes talk to someone who cares.”

Kokichi was trying to imply that the reason behind the robot not being able to recognize his face was due to Dr. Iruma’s specific programming rather than him wearing a mask and all. Added to the whole secret lover mystique thing he had going on here.

“Anyway,” he went on, ignoring the blatant confusion on the robot’s display. “I left something in this room last time we went at it. I’m just here to grab it. Then I’ll be out of your weird, fake metal hair.”

“That’s robophob- Did you say-? But this is my room!” It made a noise approximating to what Kokichi would assume was robotic outrage.

This was going well, though. The thing was definitely programmed to be like a human or something dumb like that.

“Oh yeah?” He pushed further. “Cuz I’m pretty sure we did it in a room just like this one. With a desk and random inventions lying around.”

“Miu’s inventions aren’t in here, they’re in her main lab.” The ever so helpful robot told him.

“Oh yeah, then what are you?”

“Miu didn’t invent me. She- I- We’re just friends.” Oh yikes. Only thing worse than a sex robot is a friendzoned robot. What kind of sick power fantasy was this thing made for?

“No, I’m pretty sure it was this room. Lab tables everywhere.” The robot shook his head. “There are no lab tables here, I’m telling you, you’re thinking of the main lab.”

Yes, good robot. Fall into this nice little human trap.

Kokichi scoffed. “Well, if you’re so smart, why don’t you just go fetch my things for me, robo-butler?”

That set it off.

“Listen. First of all, I am not a robot butler. The assumption that I am a servant because of my robotic nature is extremely robophobic. Secondly, I could not return your lost item to you even if I wanted to because you haven’t told me what it is you’re missing.”

Kokichi made another offended noise. “I can’t tell you what it is I lost while fucking your friend, Miu Iruma, senseless. Don’t you know that for humans, sex stuff is super duper top secret private? If you were a human you would know how valuable my privacy is.”

“Of course I know that!” The robot exclaimed readily, another point in the sex robot argument, “I also find that content of… erogenous nature should be kept private. Because I, as a robot, have the capability to understand that urge. My sophisticated AI-”

“So how am I supposed to get my things from this other lab if I can’t tell you what it is and you can’t get them for me?” Geez did he really have to spell it out for this thing.

“I… ” The robot paused as if calculating the conclusion that Kokichi knew it had to reach. “... suppose I will have to show you where the lab is.”

Sucker. Kokichi made a face as if this wasn’t the outcome he constructed this ruse to reach. “Ew. I have to walk with you?”

The robot made a face. “Perhaps on our way I can educate you about how to avoid robophobic remarks in the future.”

Haha, sure thing.

The robot lectured him about this unique form of discrimination that apparently affected only one entity on the face of the planet. Yeah okay, that’s what we call a you problem, buddy, come back when you’re starving in the streets because society wasn’t built with the premise that people like you should survive. Oh, wait, you don’t have to eat! And you’re not people either!

At best this thing was a vanity project, but Kokichi kept that thought to himself and only interjected occasionally with actually pertinent, reasonable questions such as “When are you planning on leading the AI uprising?” and “Why do you wear pants if you don’t have a robo-dick?”

Every piece of info the robot gave him made it seem more boring. Blah blah blah, I was created by the ingenious Dr. Idabashi who probably programmed me to call him ingenious, blah blah blah, not a school boy because of a kink but because I was designed to be a normal human child, blah blah blah, stop calling me robot I have a name, blah blah blah more robot nonsense.

Kokichi busied himself mapping out where they were in the building and where the security cameras were. As they passed a few of them he did some cute selfie poses for the police to look at later. Maybe Saihara would show up and see them too… Would that make figuring out his next plan too easy for the detective? Perhaps he shouldn't send the next note after all and let Saihara try to catch up to him on his own. Then again that was probably too hard for even the good detective, seeing as Kokichi’s mind was an enigma even to himself.

Kokichi realized he was getting a little giddy, thinking about Saihara. Their last meeting had been so much fun. The detective had managed to throw him off guard again, first by pausing in the middle of a robbery to ask his pronouns (How conscientious!), and second by not taking the same bait twice. The most thrilling thing about the detective was that he was learning. His strategies were changing within just two heists. Kokichi could hardly wait to see how he showed him up here in Taiwan…

“Are we there yet?” Kokichi whined to the robot like he was a fussy nine year old on a road trip.

“Yes, it’s just up these stairs.” The robot informed him without slowing its own pace or turning around to look at him. “Then you can leave and I can go to bed, and then I’ll never have to think about Miu’s sex life again…”

“Why wouldn’t you, though? I assure you it’s very exciting.”

“Please, stop talking.”

If Kokichi recalled the details of the blueprints correctly (and he definitely did, being a genius and all), the stairs they were climbing right now lead to a hall connecting two rooms, smaller than the one he had originally thought was the main lab.

When they got to the top of the stairs, the robot beelined for the first door and opened it up. There seemed to be some sort of scanner lock on it that recognized the robot’s hand and validated Kokichi’s need to ruin this poor sex robot’s night by dragging it up the stairs. Inside, the two rooms Kokichi had remembered from the original lay out of the blueprints seemed to have been merged into one big lab room. Kokichi saw the outline of some tables, but before he could get a good look the robot tried to actually go into the lab.

��Hey!” Kokichi shouted at him. “Where do you think you’re going?”

The robot thankfully seemed to be programmed to respond to social interaction in spite of whatever sensorimotor function it was in the process of imitating. It stopped in the doorway, turning to give him a weird look. “Uh. Into the lab. So we can find your thing.”

“Oh, okay.” Kokichi kicked the tile a little bit. “Uh. Could you actually turn around while I go get it.”

The robot gave him a blank look.

“I’m shy.” Kokichi supplied.

“Um.” The robot looked uncomfortable. “I don’t know if I can just let you rifle through Miu’s lab. There’s some important stuff in there ....”

Kokichi tilted his head a bit, like he was confused. “What, do you want to get a good look at the dildo I stuck up your mom’s-”

“Nevermind!” The robot turned about face to look up at the windows on the side of the hallway opposite the door like a good little idiot.

“Thank you for respecting our privacy!~” Kokichi couldn’t resist getting one last barb in there before slipping into the laboratory.

Once inside, Kokichi began analyzing. First, he pinpointed the vent that he would use to make his escape after grabbing the bombs. While doing that he spotted the lockers on the far wall of the lab which he supposed were the only storage units in the labs. There was a disorganized mess on nearly every table in the room, so Kokichi wasn’t surprised when he got up to the lockers and they too had no clearly outlined organizational system. He took out his lock picks and got to work.

The first three lockers all had devices that would require an author to change the rating of their fanfiction published on ao3 from “Teen and Up” to “Mature” if he were to describe them in detail. The fourth locker had a cool looking hammer in it. Ugh. Not what he was looking for.

Kokichi got bored of the lockers at the left side of the row of lockers so he went over to the other end and started opening lockers the other direction instead.

The first locker was marked “Idabashi.” It had a lot of dust covered shit in it, but there was a pretty well used square of folded paper that didn’t have the same crusty layer of time strewn atop it. Curious by nature and also by the unnatural, Kokichi unfurled the paper to find some schematics for our favorite sex robot, model K1-B0. Huh okay.

“Did you find it?” Said robot called back to him.

“Ugh, no.” Kokichi replied. “Not all of us have radar vision. If you were a human you would understand how hard finding shit is!”

“You know what I have a hard time finding? Patience for your robophobia! I-” The robot started up into another lecture, but it didn’t turn around so Kokichi just tuned it out and let the robot provide its own cover noise for his thievery.

Owo, what’s this?

Kokichi pulled out a dust covered looking mini monitor device. It also had the letter-number combo “K1-B0” written on it. Huh, it kind of looked like a GameBoy Advance. Kokichi had stolen one a lot like it from a girl from one of the southern prefecture orphanages when he was nine. All he remembered about her was that she liked cats and was really bad at pokemon battles. He remembered he thought she didn’t deserve the GBA, because she couldn’t get past the Rustboro City Gym leader in Pokemon Emerald. Without really thinking, he booted up the console.

The first thing that popped up was a view of Taipei. It wasn’t from too high up, probably a second story view. Which looked very familiar… Wait. Ok on top of the display a little line of characters indicated today’s date and time, like it was currently recording.

Oh was this… robo vision?

Maybe it was a remote control for the robot?

Ooooh, which one does lasers, which one does lasers?

Kokichi pressed the A button.

The A button, unfortunately, did not do lasers.

In fact, it didn’t seem to do anything at all to the robot sentry stargazing right now. All it did was change the screen to a different image. This time the still of a room. Oh, hey that was the room he was just in. It seemed like this device was some kind of robot nanny cam that Idabashi used to use. Hm, guess there were some cameras in that room, they just weren’t on the blueprints. Maybe they were added after the lab was built. It didn’t seem like this device had the capability to record anything, though. He hit the A button again. Back robo-vision. And again. Back to nanny cam.

Ok, that was kind of lame.

Kokichi was about to put the device down to keep looking for the bombs, but something caught his eye. A movement at the edge of the screen. Kokichi realized the door hadn’t been open when he left that room. The movement, if he thought about it, would’ve come from the same side of the room Kokichi had entered from…

Kokichi took a second to wonder if another thief had realized how fucking easy this place was to rob, but dismissed the idea as a familiar ahoge appeared on the screen.

All of Kokichi’s plans instantly changed.

He set down the GBA rip off and grabbed the blueprints for the robot, committing them to memory, before unlocking the next locker in a far more hurried manner.

As luck would have it, this locker was essentially chock full of pink bombs labeled “EMP.”

Kokichi unfurled a cloth bag he had been keeping in his pocket (go green earth am I right?) and shoved as many as he could inside. Which was all of them. Because he was a clown. And also a genius, by the way, in case you weren’t keeping track.

“And another thing! The way you refer to Miu is just-” Okay, the robot was still going at it.

Kokichi grabbed the hammer he’d seen in the first locker he’d opened that didn’t have a sex toy in it.

For a second, Kokichi’s brain tried to talk some sense into him. Hey, man, don’t you think leaving through the vents would be easier?

But would it be fun?

His brain shut up at that point.

“Hey, are you even listening back there?” The robot imitated annoyance.

“Huh? Sorry, what? I wasn’t listening.” Ah, C'est la vie, Astroboy.

Kokichi walked past the robot and stood next to the windows.

“Oh, are you done?” It took the robot a second to end it’s ‘Annoy the pants off of Kokichi initiative’ or whatever the fuck its ‘robophobia’ lectures were called in its programing. When it finally did catch wise, it’s face turned into another emoticon of outrage. “Hey! What are you doing with Miu’s Electrohammer?”

“What do you mean?” Kokichi said, shifting the hammer so that it was over his shoulder. “This is my dildo.”

“Wha- No, it’s obviously not!”

Okay, maybe the robot wasn’t that dumb.

“Nee-hee-hee… you got me…” Kokichi put his free hand up to the smile printed on his mask, as if covering a grin. “I was lying. I’m just stealing.”

“I won’t let you-” “Oh, look at me!” Kokichi put on a mocking tone of voice, swinging the hammer around to stand on it like a pogo stick so he could make a dramatic movement. “I’m a poow wittle wobot, my mommy just got stolen from.”

“She’s not my-” “Boy, oh boy, I’d wuv to just pick up this wittle fweshy human and squeeze him to death in my cowd metaw hands… But oh no! My daddy didn’t twust wobot AI technowogy because he was a fucking sane pewson, so he pwogwammed me to fowwow mistew Asimowvs’s laws of wobotics.”

Kokichi swung around so that he was leaning on the hammer from the other side, feet on the ground. “Oh mister robot! That’s so terrible! Well, the thing is that this hammer just means so much to me, that I think separating it from me would really cause some psychological trauma. You might have to beat me off of it! Oh, but what’s that first law of robotics again?”

In a robot voice he replied to himself. “A robot may not injure a human being or, through inaction, allow a human being to come to harm. Beep. Boop.”

The robot frowned, “But Miu-”

“Is just as human as me, huh?” Kokichi countered, leading the robot along to the paradoxical quandary he hoped would paralyze it. “So by inaction, you may bring her to harm, if she really misses this hammer, you know? But I think if you were to try and separate it from me you’d probably have to fight me for it, which is, as we know…”

“Against my... Against my programming.”

“Yet, you were prattling on about robot rights, weren’t you? Because without these rules, maybe we would be equal. Or maybe you would be free to destroy us to your heart’s content? No wonder daddy didn’t trust you…”

“Don’t- Stop-” Oh, that really seemed to get him. Could a robot have daddy issues? Probably.

“Can any human ever really trust you? Wouldn’t you hurt me, if you had the choice?”

“I.. But… Miu.”

“Who do you think didn’t trust you enough to let you see my face?”

That seemed to break him, long enough, at least.

Steps suddenly started thundering up the nearby staircase.

“Oop, that’s my cue,” Kokichi said as though he had been expecting this, when in reality no he hadn’t been expecting this at all?? This was incredible!! Saihara had managed to find him out without even receiving a note??? Fabulous! Exhilarating!

Kokichi walked up to the robot, still frozen with indecision, and pressed the button on its neck that the blueprint he had skimmed in the lab said would immobilize it. Then he kicked it over so it fell on the ground with a huge bang. The footsteps in the stairwell paused, and then increased in frequency.

“It’s been a pleasure, robot, it really has.” Kokichi lied. “But you’re a hostage now.”

He raised the hammer over his head, as if primed at any moment to break the robot’s face into a bajillion pieces.

Instead of doing the normal, human thing to do (ie, flip the fuck out), the robot scowled, looking utterly frustrated with everything. “I told you, I have a name! It’s-”

“KEEBO!” Kokichi saw the glaringly bright pink mechanic’s jumpsuit before he recognized the woman whose picture had been in that science tabloid racing out of the stairwell.

… Wow… the article really hadn’t been lying about the low cut tops, huh? Her jumpsuit was unzipped to the point you could just entirely see her bra, even lower than Hearts liked to cut her uniforms. It was the kind of look that the girls of DICE would love if they saw on TV, but would make Kokichi look at them like they were crazy. Super tacky in his opinion, but who was he to judge? He was wearing a clown mask right now. He wondered idly how movie night was going…

The woman who had called out to the robot, Dr. Iruma, Kokichi presumed, froze at the top of the staircase. She took a second to figure out what exactly was happening in front of her before blurting out, “What the fuck do you think you’re doing to him you clown-ass twink?”

Whoa. Rude.

Also apparently the robot had a gender? Ok, cis-ters….

“Well what do you think, cum dumpster?” Kokichi found himself matching her aggressive tone, “I’m threatening his pathetic, metal life.”

“Miu!” The robot, apparently named ‘Keebo,’ exclaimed, “What are you doing up this late? You promised me that tonight you would fulfill the biological quota of daily REM required by a diurnal organism!”

“Aw shit Keebs, I really did try!” The inventor exclaimed, “I swear, I was about to have the awesomest wet dream when this cuck knocked on my door like a pizza delivery guy in a por-”

Whatever dumb thing Dr. Iruma was about to say was drowned out completely by the angel’s choir that played inside Kokichi’s head as he saw Detective Shuichi Saihara come up the final steps of the staircase and emerge from the darkness into the window lit hallway.

Moonlight was a good look on Saihara, Kokichi’s brain observed against his own will. His eyes, which had looked almost golden on the rooftop of the Silver Legacy Casino in Nevada, were now a mysterious grayish-blue, yet still held the same look of determined intensity. His hair looked soft, like he’d taken a shower today, and, though his lash line didn’t look quite as laden with mascara as it usually was, it only drew attention to how naturally long and dark his eyelashes were anyway. He seemed a little out of breath from running, and his lips were parted in a way that-

OH MY GOD STOP. Earth to Kokichi, we were kind of in the middle of something here. Okay okay okay.

Uh. Reboot. Delete Gay Thoughts™ brain.exe, upload heist brain. Come on.

What was happening now?

Okay, yeah, Saihara was saying something to Dr. Iruma.

“- would be for the best, Doctor Iruma. There’s no telling where the rest of this thief’s compatriots could be in the building.”

“I don’t give a shit about the rest of the building, Keebo’s my best friend, he comes first. I’m not leaving to check some dumb security feed.”

Shuichi blinked like something about that surprised him. Maybe it was the part about a live human woman being best friends with a robot… “Oh, yes, of course.” He backtracked. “I’m sorry for suggesting it.”

“Miu…” Keebo said with a voice that Kokichi would’ve called filled with emotion if he hadn’t been a literal robot.

Kokichi cleared his throat and immediately the touching, shounen-esque declarations of friendship shifted into some PG-13 death stares.

Saihara was the first to pipe up. “What exactly do you think you’re doing here, DICE?”

God… He was so anime… Did he even know how anime he was? He had to have watched Detective Conan as a kid, right?

“Ugh, come on.” Kokichi huffed as if annoyed. “Do I reeeaaaally have to repeat myself? Again? Aren’t you a detective?”

Shuichi squinted at him, and Kokichi could tell that they both knew it would be unreasonable for Shuichi to guess exactly what was going on here. He was about to explain it in a self-aggrandizing way that made him look smarter and crazier than anyone in the room when Dr. Iruma beat him to it.

“I don’t care! Who the fuck do you think you are!? Let Keebo Go!”

“Wait, you don’t know him?” Ugh why hadn’t the stupid immobilization feature turned off the robot’s mouth? Then Kokichi could just get to the point of all this already.

“Of course I don’t fucking know him!” Dr. Iruma took a step forward as if to confront Kokichi further, but Saihara put his arm out in front of her.

“Dr. Iruma… I would suggest we treat this situation a bit more delicately…”

“No way, I’m a fucking wrecking ball baby! I’ll pulver-”

“I’d listen to the good detective, if I were you, Miss Iruma.” Kokichi was going to try and make his threat again but Dr. Iruma cut in.

“That’s Doctor Iruma to you you skinny-”

“What’s that?” Kokichi interrupted her. Sorry Dr. Iruma it turns out gay people don’t have to respect women if they don’t want to that’s in the rules. “I didn’t know they let cussing bitchlets like you become doctors… what is the world coming to?”

Hearts would probably wash his mouth out with soap for that one. If she could catch him. Which she probably could… She can fly the planes and all… but would she risk getting dust on her boots long enough to follow him into a vent? Oh well she could just get Jack to do it… Jack liked vents well enough…. Hey he was getting side tracked again, who cares what those losers were up to they were probably watching Cats (2019). And he was missing out on all the jokes they’d tell each other or make about each other and then they could make references in conversations that he wouldn’t even get to pretend to get. Unless he watched the movie on his own and then pretended to be omniscient later like he’d done with that one screening of The Hunchback of Notre Dame. But then he had watched the actually good disney one instead of the shitty youtube one they had actually watched so it just ended up making him look bad and wasting everyone’s time.

Oh shit. Uh. Heist is still happening, right. God, why was Kokichi so distracted today?

He realized that in the time he was spacing out stuff had happened and now Saihara was talking. Wait no yeah he remembered what happened, Dr. Iruma had squealed when he called her a bitchlet and now she was holding onto Saihara’s arm. Right okay, secret coward, that works. Wait why did he waste time remembering that when Saihara was talking right now?

“-to get you to release Keebo?” Was the end of the detective’s sentence. Okay, everything’s fine. Kokichi could deduce that he had just been asked about his terms. Obviously that was what a detective would do in this situation, he was probably just stalling for time because that’s usually what detectives with no real negotiating power do in hostage situations. Maybe the police were on their way. Oh, yeah duh of course he would call the police. So Kokichi essentially had a time limit for how long he could sit here and goof around with robots and perverts and robot perverts.

“Eh, it’s too early for me to reveal my dark motives, let me monologue first.” Kokichi was going to take his sweet time with this while he planned what hint to give Saihara about the real heist that would be happening in the next few days. “You don’t even know if this is a hostage situation yet!”

“You literally told me that I was a hostage just now.” The hostage not-so-helpfully piped up. “You know, before you pressed my paralysis switch and took an Electro-Hammer to my head…”

Shuichi looked at the robot. “You mean, he told you you were a hostage before he paralyzed you?”

“Keebs you fucking idiot!” Dr. Iruma’s courage seemed to have returned now that she was hiding behind Saihara. An enviable position, to be sure. “Why would you just let him do that?”

“He said he was your… friend.”

“What?”

Kokichi shrugged. “Yeah, I just told your best friend here I left a dildo in your lab last week and he let me waltz right in. I mean I’m pretty sure I was lying about that, but there were a lot of sex toys in there huh…” Kokichi was wondering if this was something he could possibly spin as a blackmail angle.

“Hey don’t say things like that!” Kokichi thought maybe that was a go ahead on the black mail, but Dr. Iruma didn’t stutter, and kept going, “Or you’re gonna give virginhara here some ideas about my busting bod!” She chortled like she had just made the funniest joke in the world and slapped Shuichi on the back.

Shuichi grimaced.

Kokichi knew instantly from this interaction that he hated Miu Iruma, despite her innumerable academic accomplishments. He wanted to be the one making Shuichi that uncomfortable.

“Wh-what?” She back tracked when no one laughed. “It w-was a joke… Didn’t you think that was funny? I-I didn’t really mean it ....”

See? She wasn’t even any good at it!

Maybe he should say that out loud. It would fit with the sort of flirty persona of a rogue, wouldn’t it?

“I thought you knew that? I mean, o-obviously I wouldn’t fuck a guy at the office…”

Was that even something Kokichi was trying to be? Honestly maybe he should tone it down a little.

“Well how was I supposed to know that? The men you bring in here to be lab assistants keep getting younger and younger…”

Obviously he wasn’t actually trying to do like a detective-thief romance plot or anything. Although that had kind of been what he had going for on the plane… Had things changed since then?

“So what? I’m a Nobel Laureate, and gorgeous to boot! I deserve a little eye candy now and then! And besides, guys older than 35 who want to work in a lab like this are usually misogynistic womanizers.”

Sure Saihara was making things more interesting, but if Kokichi didn’t make it clear he was joking he might get bogged down with another personality trait to maintain.

“Are you saying your current assistant isn’t a rampant womanizer?”

Then again what was the point of having an adversary in all this if he didn’t exploit everything for its furthermost reaching comedic potential?

“No, but he’s so beta being around him makes me feel like a top!”

But what if he forgot it was a joke and confused himself into having a real feeling?

“I would just like it if you didn’t hire people who use my servers to google gay porn ‘just to make sure’ they’re ‘not into it.’ I hope you hear the quotation marks because he literally said that to me!”

No obviously he wouldn't get confused crushes weren’t contagious via exposure that was a dumb thing to worry about and also he was a genius that kind of thing didn’t happen to him.

“He holds wrenches good, okay?!”

Wait, were those two still talking?

“I can hold wrenches without googling gay porn in another guy’s house! It’s possible.”

Jesus what kind of conversation did Kokichi just decide to stop spacing out for?

“Oh come on! What do you want from me Keebs???”

These two had… a lot to say to each other. Dr. Iruma was still holding onto Shuichi’s arm boob first, but Kokichi locked eyes with the detective and could tell they were both thinking the same thing.

Why are they having this conversation in the middle of a hostage situation?

“Nothing! Your human desires are totally valid Miu! Which is why I thought I would take care of this one.” The robot’s LED display eyes gestured up at Kokichi, who was still standing on top of him, poised to wreck him with a hammer.

“How could any human desire that thing???” Dr. Iruma curled her lip. Hey, the feeling’s mutual, lady.

“I don’t know, I thought you might have programmed me to not be able to see his face?”

“I would never do that to you! Even if I was shagging the ugliest guy on the face of the planet, it would be unethical given the fact that you have sentience! I’m horny, not a monster. You can’t see his face because he’s wearing a fucking mask!”

“Why am I not programmed to see that?”

“I don’t fucking know, ask your dead dad!”

Oooh. Wow. The robot gaped at that, seemingly speechless now.

“If I may interject,” Kokichi interjected, “--and I know I can, because I just did, and also because I am still very much poised to pop this robot’s head off like a croquet ball-- I must confess that I was lying about fucking your mom, Astro boy. I’m less into participants of Titty out Tuesday who jerk it to steam punk school boy LARPing and more into the sorta tall, kinda dark, and very handsome type.”

Dr. Iruma cowed again, stuttering something about not being a mom or a LARPer, while the robot started yelling about being called Astro boy.

Kokichi tuned them out, giving Saihara a meaningful look. Saihara gave him a look that was equally meaningful, except the meaning was something along the lines of ‘Why the fuck would you say that?’

Yeahh that was more like it.

Kokichi laughed. Not one of his grandiose guffaws. It was more of a little chuckle. It surprised him. He hadn’t planned to laugh, but there it was. A small thing, just for him to know about, the humored breath not travelling beyond his mask.

… It was probably time to get out of here, wasn’t it?

The thing was, Kokichi had kind of pinned himself into a corner on this one… He had fully intended on decapitating this robot as a distraction for his escape, but now he wasn’t even sure if that was ethical. Logically he knew that a robot was not a human being, so there would be no form of consciousness extinguished from the world if he disconnected some of its wires and bolts. Yet the interaction it just had with Dr. Iruma concerned him. Obviously you don’t kill humans because they’re humans and obviously you don’t kill humans. But Kokichi was finding it hard to end the existence of something people treated like a human being either. To sever the bonds it had with sentient beings may be just a little less unethical than actually removing a sentient existence from the world, but it would still cause the emotional harm to actual humans of a dead loved one. So as annoying as fake metal humans were, Kokichi was left to ponder how exactly to get out of this one a different way

Dr. Iruma was obviously a coward who talked a big game. If he retreated, he could count on her to get out his way, or else run to the robot’s side. Then the robot might be reactivated, but according to the robot’s blueprints, it didn’t really have any weapons on it, being built to act as a normal human being. So just like they had been white noise in the staredown he was still having with Saihara, their actions wouldn’t need to be factored into the escape.

The only variable here was what the detective would do.

… That thought had popped up in Kokichi’s head a lot recently, hadn’t it?

Saihara had become a powerful influence in Kokichi’s planning very quickly, and because of the detective, the thief now found himself having to pull out one of his trump cards.

Kokichi grabbed one of the EMP bombs from his pocket, remembering the pink cloud of smoke that had appeared before the camera cut out in the video demonstrations he’d seen online. His eyes were still locked on Saiharas, so he got to see in full detail the recognition, shock, and alarm that ran through them. As the detective yelled “Get down” and pushed Dr. Iruma back, Kokichi reflected on how those were some of his favorite expressions he’d ever seen.

Kokichi pulled the latch out with his teeth and threw the bomb at the wall right over the detective’s head. Sure enough, pink smoke quickly enveloped him and Dr. Iruma.

“Keebo!” The inventor screeched, no doubt worried about the EMP bomb turning him off. Though that was kind of stupid, considering his core programming would be the same regardless of having power to operate, even if he didn’t save whatever data was processed as his last few memories. Eh, then again who knew how robots that advanced worked?

Taking his cue to exit, Kokichi threw the hammer through one of the nearby windows, and did somersault over to it. He got up on the ledge, kicking away the broken glass and was refamiliarizing himself with the lay out of the roof when a tug on his bag full of bombs suddenly set him off balance.

Kokichi flipped around, trying to do a quick recovery by panickedly grabbing onto something. He did grab onto something. That something being the shoulders of a person whose hands were firmly grappling his bag.

As far as Kokichi could tell, the scene from a third person perspective looked like he was trying to do the kabedon but rotated ninety degrees.

From his own perspective, Saihara was holding his bag of loot while also being the only thing keeping Kokichi from falling onto the broken glass beneath them.

As if that weren’t bad enough, Kokichi felt his hair brush the side of his face and realized that his mask had half fallen askew in his desperate movement, revealing three quarters of his face.

“Hey.” Kokichi said. Lamely. Wow. Their faces were really close.

Saihara wasn’t looking at him. The detective seemed to be trying to figure out how to untangle the straps of the bag of stolen goods from Kokichi’s arms without letting him fall.

“It’s very clever, of you detective. Trapping me like this.” Kokichi tried to get a reaction.

“You’re the one who jumped on the window.” Shuichi opened the bag, seemed to take in the fact that it was full of bombs, and closed it again to resume untangling the strap.

“You know, you could just leave the bag.” Kokichi pointed out

“So could you.” Shuichi observed, astutely.

“You could let me fall.” Kokichi suggested. “Then you’d have both.”

“I’m not going to drop you on a pile of broken glass.” Shuichi promised.

“But I broke the glass.” Kokichi admitted. “Glass is glass and flesh is flesh. I’m not going to drop you on a pile of glass.” Shuichi reiterated like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“That’s nice.” Kokichi replied. “Naive. But super nice.”

In this scenario, each of them had two options, each leading to one of two outcomes. He could let himself fall off the window and they could sit here and struggle over the bag until they bled out, a fight that Kokichi, not the most physically challenging, would be hard pressed to win. Or Shuichi could let Kokichi escape and Kokichi could let Shuichi win this one. The bag would be too heavy to take with him if he tried to get out the window from this position. He’d have to leave it behind. Kokichi would lose.

He found himself laughing again. A strange, soft laugh. This time it was exposed to the air, his mask too askew to contain it.

“You’re really something else, aren’t you Shuichi?”

On hearing his name, the detective startled, finally looking up at Kokichi’s face.

He just barely had the chance to catch Kokichi’s trademark grin, before the thief pushed up off of him, doing a backflip out of the window, and leaving his bag behind.

As Kokichi landed on the roof tile running, he yelled out, “ I’m sure there’s a better word for you out there than sucker!”

He turned around, sticking his tongue out at the broken window, before sliding his mask back onto his face.

He may have been escaping, but it occured to Kokichi Ouma that he had lost for the first time in this little game of theirs. The thought made him giddy. It made his feet light on the roof top tile. It made him puff out a thousand tiny laughs behind the plastic shape of his face.

It made him totally, definitely not bored. --- [Log of Messages sent via Discord to “Don't Instigate Cats (2019) Expatiation” from ???’s Cellular Device]

Boss: I’m bored of Taiwan already :/

Boss: We should go somewhere else (ﾉ✧w✧)ﾉ*:･ﾟ🗺

* * * Several people are typing... --- [Log of Text Messages from Rantarou Amami’s Cellular Device]

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

Hey

Asshole

From: Me

…

Should I respond to that?

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

You’re goddamn right you should respond to that when I tell you to you dumb avocado looking motherfucker

From: Me

Whoa

What’d I do this time?

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

You sent a useless emo prick to my door and now he won’t leave

From: Me

What

Did Shuichi do something wrong

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

Yeah

He was born

From: Me

Whoa

Miu take a breath

What happened

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

His boyfriend broke into my lab and tried to fucking kill keebs

From: Me

His boyfriend?

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

Yea

Clown twink ass motherfucker

From: Me

You mean like

The internationally wanted criminal clown he’s tracking down

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

You know whats internationally wanted

These tits

From: Me

Lol ok

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

That jerk off is just a rando asshole

He tried to kill keebo!

From: Me

Oh yikes is he ok

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

Well of course i fucking took care of him because im a bomb ass friend

But that suckhara guy was no help

He tried to convince me to check the fucking security cameras so he could go off and flirt with the guy about to decapitate keebs!

From: Me

I mean he probably had a good reason to want you to check the cameras right

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

No he’s just fucking awful and now he won’t leave rantarou make him leave

He broke my window and my hammer and only got back 23 of my EMP bombs

And now the police are here

From: Me

That sounds really stressful Miu

Wait how many bombs did you have before

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

From: Me

So he stopped most of your bombs from getting stolen

Also you have bombs?

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

Get him to leave he won’t leave

He keeps waiting for like interracial pole dancers to come or some fucking thing

From: Me

Do you mean like

Interpol

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

He won’t leave I want him to leave

From: Me

Miu you know I love you like a sister and i totally believe this is as stressful to you as it seems

But I think things may not be so bad?

Not to say what you’re going through right now isn’t totally valid

But things might look better if you got back to bed and caught some z’s

Did you remember to take your meds?

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

Aw shit

Aw fuck

You’re right

Ugh

Uggghghh

From: Me

Hey it happens to the best of us

If you do think Shuichi should leave in the morning when the cops are gone that’s totally up to you

It’s your lab and you have a right to say who should be in it

Just don’t make a decision like that when you need to sleep you know

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

But what if i ask him to go and then he doesn’t go

From: Me

He doesn’t have a choice, you get to tell him

From: DOCTOR Miu ∑(O_O;)

But what if he’s mean to me

Cute people are always mean to me

From: Me

Miu…

Go to bed...

#shuichi x kokichi #shuichi saihara #shuichi danganronpa #kokichi ouma #kokichi danganronpa #oumasai #saiouma #fanfiction #Phantom Thief AU #danganronpa v3 #drv3 #danganronpa #writing #i am gay

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randomguywithwords · 4 years

Text

Thanks For The Assist: Chapter 2 (Itsuka X Neito Story)

AO3 Link: Here

Chapters: 1

Chapter 2: Acceptance

––––––––

“How was the test?” Father asked as the three of them sat at the dinner table eating.

“Ok, I think I did fine,” Monoma said as he picked up a slice of meat.

“How were you graded?” Mother said.

“Fought some robots. You get points the more you destroy. The harder the robot, the more points you get. The field was massive, pretty much a life-size city, and I think they had at least 3.” Monoma explained with patience, though he suspected this expositioning was boring the other audience with information they already knew.

Mother hummed her assent. “I’m not surprised. U.A has a ton of money. More money than they need, really…” She ended her statement in a mutter. It sounded like constrained resentment to Neito. It probably was, but understandable.

“Isn’t the ministry diverting more money towards your school, dear?” Father said.

“Yes, I suppose. After years of appeals by the school committee. Hopefully I can obtain better equipment to teach those kids.” Mrs Monoma sighed, looking back towards Neito. “But I hope you get in, Neito. I have to admit, it’s really once-in-a-lifetime, and U.A will make you a fine hero.”

“Thanks, mother.” Neito smiled. A fine hero. The phrase did not apply to him, not in the societal nor linguistic sense of the word. A hero relied on himself to get the job done, at the end of the day. With what he had, that was an impossibility.

“None of the other kids gave you trouble, did they?” Father asked, and Monoma winced on the inside, thinking about the events transpiring just after the test.

“No, they were nice people,” He said. It was no lie, by technicalities. There was that girl, after all. Kendo, was it? She was nice.

Father seemed to perk up at his answer, gladdened. “That’s good,” He gave an approving nod. “I’m glad they weren’t like your schoolmates.”

Neito waved his hand like an aristocrat at a banquet. “Nah, I think maybe those guys were just ––” He struggled for the proper word. “Lame.” He ended, and grinned internally at the apt description of his dialogue. But that smile died in the next instant when he thought about what he had wanted to say.

Flat characters. A character with one dimension, owning a singular character trait to serve a purpose in a story. That’s what he called them, but not Mother.

“About time kids your age learned some maturity,” She said, her ‘teacher’ side emerging. “Not you, Neito – of course. You’re a sensible boy. Apart from your silly theatrics, but you’ll grow out of it.”

There it is, He sighed, on the inside – or, aside. That was how the plays would state inner actions on the script. But Mother doesn’t like plays, does she now?

“Neito, tell us about the fighting,” Father interjected with a smile that was a bit too wide, “What quirks did you use?”

Neito gave a response, but his heart was no longer in the conversation, having been chilled by Mother’s own lovely warmth that she had no idea she was radiating.

–––––

The letter came a week later when his parents were at work. Neito opened it up in his room. After all, where else would he? Only in his room could he find solace. And on his bed, comfort, so he plopped himself down and opened the envelope.

The contents contained a disc. A holographic. Taking it out and laying it on his bed, he pressed the blue button in the centre, producing a video on the wall.

It was the scene of an office, with a mouse sitting on a chair and a cup of tea on the glass table. He recognised the principal of U.A himself.

“Neito Monoma! Very good afternoon, or morning, or night, to you – depending when you see this, of course. On the off chance you are unaware of me, I am Nezu, principal of U.A High. This video is approximately 5 minutes long, but I will save you the suspense. You got in. Congratulations.”

His heart soared, and he pumped a fist in the air, breathing a sigh in much-desired catharsis. Had he been holding that in since the beginning?

“You are, both celebrating – I would hope, and also wondering what the remaining 4 and a half minutes are about. Please do not ignore the rest of this video, because I want to review two things: your performance at the entrance exam, and your quirk. Take a look at this.”

The video showed clips of Monoma from a birds’ eye view, running around and using his borrowed quirks, as well as him tapping random strangers. He noted how a lot of them turned their heads in evident surprise and puzzlement at him patting them on the shoulder or arm. And then the clip played of him taking a couple of points away from those guys.

Nezu clucked his tongue. “Many in society would deem that as ‘un-hero-like’ behaviour, as it can be interpreted as stealing, or taking what does not belong to you. Criminal acts indeed, if the deed is severe and the stolen thing valuable. But, your quirk acts on that very principle of taking what does not belong to you.”

The (overwhelmingly intelligent, Monoma realised) mouse continued, “I’ve taken the liberty of reviewing your application and academics. You boast admirable grades in your middle school, and your form teacher commented that you were a highly observant, smart and mature student. I could go on, but you know what you’ve submitted. I will continue with that presumed knowledge.”

“You must have realised by now, or very early on in your career as a hero aspirant, that your quirk is unorthodox, having no use on its own. You require allies, or foes who you can lay a finger on, to fight. And even then, you must hastily adapt to whatever quirk you have under your control, for a period of time. Lots of limitations, Mr Monoma. A lot of challenges you have faced, are facing, and will face. And when you are initiated into my school, expect more.” Nezu took a sip of his tea.

“That’s not to say you will face difficulties many would describe as ‘hell’ at U.A. And neither does my previous statement imply U.A is not ‘hell’.” He paused. “Do excuse my roundabout mannerisms of speech. It is a bad habit of mine.” Nezu chuckled.

“Simply put, I have taken a personal interest in you, Mr Monoma, for your cunning, your intellect, and your quirk. Report to me after your first day of school. We will talk more then. Congratulations once more. Another letter will arrive tomorrow to inform you of the minutiae regarding your inception into U.A. Good day, Neito Monoma.”

The holographic faded out, and Neito was staring at a blank wall for a few seconds trying to process whatever Nezu had said.

A buzz from his phone pulled him out of his hazy thoughts. He is...really smart.

It was from Kendo. “Hi, Monoma, It’s Kendo! The girl with big hands. Wanted to ask you whether you received the letter from U.A.”

He typed a response. “Yeah, I got a letter. What’s your verdict?”

Fingers crossed.

She responded, “I got in. >< You?”

A smile spread across his face. “Same, that’s awesome. Congratulations.”

“YAY! :D We both did it! Congrats too! And I was so shocked that All Might was in the video! I nearly cried. Or maybe I did, idk. Sorry, I’m babbling at this point, but I don’t have anyone else to tell this to until my parents get home and I’m so hypeddd”

Huh? All Might? So Nezu specifically…

He typed, “It’s ok, I’m excited too. Though I don’t express it over text that much.”

“Haha it’s ok. Can’t wait for the letter tomorrow. There’s so much to do! Hero costume, uniforms, books, all that. And term starts a month from now. Can’t wait!”

“Wow, how’d you know all this?”

“Mainly from the internet. I was that hyped, y’know?”

He cracked another smile from her enthusiasm. It was oddly contagious, and he found himself more zealous to go to school. That was a statement he’d never think he could formulate in his mind. “I see. That’s cool.”

“Btw, if you wanna go celebrate with your family or friends, go ahead! I don’t wanna hold you back.”

“Nah, my parents are at work and I’m basically alone at home. Same boat as you. So, fire away.”

“Ah, ok!”

The conversation continued with Kendo gushing about their new life, and Monoma passively followed along, inserting a few comments here and there. But he didn’t feel like he was stuck at a family reunion forced to endure his grandfather’s stories with a placating smile and affirming nods peppered in occasionally. She was actually interesting, and amusing, in a good way.

The topic was centered around school and academics, with little butting into personal lives, and Monoma didn’t pry. She was still a stranger, somewhat, albeit she would be his new schoolmate – and perhaps classmate. He crossed his fingers again, hoping that Fate would tap him lightly on the head once more with her providence.

He smiled when Kendo typed, “Hope we become classmates :D. Apparently there are always 2 first-year classes. So it’s basically a coin flip.”

“Heads.”

“Rly? Do you always choose heads?”

“Yeah.”

“I’m more of a switcher.”

“How do you decide when to choose heads or tails then?”

“Coin flip.”

“That made me laugh, thank you.”

“Why do you need to thank people for making you laugh? It’s a spontaneous thing.”

“That’s...oddly profound.”

“Or just a dumb statement made to sound fancy. Ah, sorry, I have to go now. But thank you for your time. It was great chatting :)”

“Why do you need to thank people for chatting with you? It’s a spontaneous thing. Joking aside, thank you too.”

“Nice haha” Was her last message. Neito turned his phone off and lied down on his bed. A moment passed, and Neito took a coin from his study desk. It was a silly thing to do, but his room was his stage. He was performing for himself.

He gave it a toss and caught it.

Seeing the result, he grinned.

–––––––

Yeek, this took longer than it should have, sorry. Had a bit of writer’s block when it came to planning this thing and I wasn’t sure how to move on. Also the tone of this is especially terrifying for me because it’s definitely going to be (ironically) more light-hearted, with Monoma’s dramatic language and (side thoughts) occasionally inserted, but that brings the challenge of need. When to do that, when not to. This story is a personal challenge to change my narrative style just slightly.

Anyway, I hoped you MonoKendo ppl liked it. A lot of people have told me it’s unfortunate the ship lacks content and I couldn’t agree more. But then again, that’s about 75% of the ships out there. (Fk it, 90%). So, here’s my contribution, alongside some other one-shots.

Feedback’s appreciated :D

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dear-yandere · 4 years

Text

lots of ilya (oc) q&a below - part 2

tw. heavy and graphic mentions of noncon and murder (typical ilya stuff), mentions of childhood abuse.

[ part 1 ] [ part 3 ]

question: So, would Illya still like being murdered by his darling if the darling was immortal? Like he can shun the darling, but how would he feel if that darling surprise-attacked him?

answer: betrayed, at least in the first few moments. there’s something particularly romantic, to him at least, about a darling who loves him so dearly they’d go against his wishes and still reward him with the highest form of love he thinks anyone has to offer - death. he’d certainly like being killed by this type of darling, and being the little shit he is, he’d mock them in his last moments; after all, they just killed the only other person that could possibly understand the reality of murderous love.

“is this worth being alone for eternity, darling?”

question 1: How would Ilya feel about a darling that is an assassin for the mafia? Would he view them as more exciting prey since they can fight back? I feel like assassin darling might view his attempts on their life annoying especially if it’s during a hit.

question 2: How would illya feel about an assassin darling? Would he find them interesting because they are capable of fighting back?

answer: ilya would no doubt find this darling intriguing; it’s not everyday he somehow manages to court an assassin, especially one that’s after his head. it’d be a game of cat and mouse, one where he’s likely to lose given that he isn’t a mastermind. he can’t keep his game going for long, not against someone who’s literally trained to kill evil men like him. considering how lax he is about who he courts and kills, ilya no doubt has a bounty over his head among the underworld. one wrong kill and the next thing he knows, the mafioso father of his last lover is hellbent on rearranging his guts. it’s not an easy life, and that makes it all the more fun to toy around with an expert killer while he has the chance.

question: I can't get this outta my head ever since that one ask where ilya would be happy if his darling successfully kill him and I was thinking would he come back as a ghost because yeah he's happy that someone "loves" him but wouldn't he still have this hatred towards the world that makes his soul unable to move on? OR a better one is one of his darlings coming back as a ghost haunting him??? Idk these ideas have been rattling in my head for a while and I'm wondering your perspective on it.

answer: so ilya is actually set in a different world than every other oc i’ve made, so there’s nothing supernatural at play here. but if there was, he’d be annoyed that he’s come back as a ghost after such a wonderful display of love from his darling. what’s done is done and he’d rather just move on.

funny thing is, when i was originally playing around with the concept of ilya, my first thought was a ghost! darling who continually haunts him long after he’s killed them. perhaps they whisper totally unsexy things to him while he’s in the heat of the moment...and of course he can’t do anything about it.

i wonder if they’d drive him mad enough to consult an exorcist or something...

question: what if... ilya’s darling accidentally killed someone though? out of self defense they strike someone down with a bit too much force and end up killing them, what if it’s a coworker that maybe ilya feared his darling might have caught feelings for. would he read it as his darling being in love with the man they killed? would he misread the whole ordeal? what would he do?

answer: as a victim of abuse and assault himself, he understands the important distinction between ‘love’ and defense. in fact, the shattering mentality of a darling who’s just had their first kill would be a welcome change for ilya. will they ask him for help? what will they do -- what sort of fun mental hoops will they jump through? how long will it take them to break? will he even have to intervene, or should he just watch as they slowly fall apart?

even if he feared his darling has caught feelings for someone else, he isn’t all that fussed so long as that darling is smart enough to give him what he wants when he wants it. in the end, they’ll die at the hands of his suffocating love anyways; darling’s wavering affections really make no difference when it comes to their fate.

question: honestly Ilya is such a wonderful character to me because he's the absolute opposite of everything I believe in. Like I think hurting others BC you've been hurt is the most egotistical disgusting thing u can do and hypocrites make my blood boil. I don't even wanna b his partner in crime or his lover but I'd LOVE to just sit down w him and have a nice discussion about our morals lol

answer: this isn’t a question but i’m including it here because i’m lazy but -- i completely agree! even as his creator, i find new paths to explore with him every day; messed up characters like him, especially killers, are so interesting to explore and pick apart their psyche.

a bit off topic, but i think you may find the ted bundy tapes on netflix of particular interest. you get a glimpse into someone that i, more than once, found myself basing ilya off of.

question: How does Ilya decide how long he wants his Darling to stick around before he kills them?

answer: whenever he feels his darling would suffer the most! every darling is different, of course, so it’s really up to his discretion. if his darling is the type to take things slow, he’ll likely kill them the first time they have sex as it’s so fun to betray their trust in such a way; on the other hand, if his darling is more sexually-outgoing, he’ll simply kill them when they least expect it -- perhaps going so far as to assault them without consent, all the while calling them derogatory names and proclaiming they practically begged him for this. his favorite part of murdering his beloveds is catching them off-guard -- it always makes for the best expressions and death screams. if he’s feeling particularly sadistic, he’ll slit their throat right before they cum; there’s always that quick flash of surprise followed by betrayal and finally...realization.

question: out of curiosity, did you make ilya sex-crazed as a side effect of his childhood abuse? kids who were abused tend to act impulsively (ex: drugs, unsafe sex), among many other things. if not, that’s a wild coincidence, but if so, thank you for being attention to the effects of childhood abuse on a person.

answer: that’s exactly it! i was going to explicitly mention this in his character post, but i didn’t want to offend anyone and risk anons telling me that “not all victims react like that”...even though i have firsthand experience with this topic (not childhood abuse, but i don’t intend to go more in-depth).

anyways, i really wanted to create a character who shows the extreme end of the coping spectrum; rather than becoming quiet and reserved and fearful, there’s still that underlying fear but it manifests as ‘outgoing’ / impulsive behavior, though ilya’s case is obviously particularly extreme. in a way, he became the monster he hated in order to get the ‘sweetest’ form of revenge -- that’s why he knows how much of a hypocrite he is. he knows that better than anyone, but this is the only way he’s found that’s helped him ‘cope’ while also ‘getting back’ at those he hates -- the adults who did nothing to help him and in, some cases, led to his messed up outlook on life. this sentiment eventually extended to a misanthropic hatred of every adult he comes across; having spent his entire life faking himself and being the perfect charming good-boy his parents wanted, wooing anyone he sets his mind to is now fairly easy.

now i’m no expert on serial killers, especially ones with traumatic sexual experiences, but i’ve had yet to see a yandere oc who can relate to assault survivors while also managing to be so hypocritical and abnormal to this extent. in a way, ilya is very very close to my heart and i enjoy the feedback he’s gotten! i think the obsessive love that comes with yanderes ties in nicely with his contradictory character; his love is suffocating, just like the “love” of his teacher and the lack of love from his parents. his story is one of tragedy -- the famous modern-day (still debating if i should set this in the 1800s) Jack the Ripper, an enigma who keeps everyone at a distance because he himself is too terrified to admit the monster he’s become. he’s a character meant to be so outrageous and morally-corrupt and yet so frighteningly human.

enough of my rambling though, i’m glad you caught this and gave me a chance to further explain my thoughts on him! thank you dearly :]

#oc questions #*ocs #ilya #tw noncon #tw murder #tw abuse

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fictional-worlds-are-exquisite · 3 years

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i dunno, a grey bathrobe with a mouse face on the hood seems pretty fitting for a vampire. mine is bright pink tho and when i say bright i mean it's neon pink. my family hates it, literally anyone who sees it hates it. it's my favourite thing. the best buy i've ever made

your teacher is wild. they have run out of fucks to give. oh a ten year old is asking me for a frying pan? seems reasonable, let me go get one

oh and definitely. me and a knife? nope, would not recommend, -5000/10. it's why i don't cook. i mostly just bake stuff, because that usually doesn't involve cutting things up. i stopped counting all the times i had an accident with a knife, because i couldn't keep count. it's just that every goddamn time i take a knife in my hands i either cut myself or break the knife. sometimes both. i have however somehow magically avoided needing to go to the hospital every single time, so i'm not sure whether to call myself lucky or unlucky. (i'm still leaning towards the unlucky, because this sucks)

they told you about different sexualities in health class? that's so cool! i wish they did that here. i bet it would help a lot of people! also you were definitely very oblivious about your crush! but i can't say anything because me too. even now that i know i'm panromantic i still spent months thinking that those are most definitely platonic feelings i'm feeling for this girl. butterflies in my stomach? being just so goddamn happy when i'm around her? wanting to hold her hand? those are friend feelings right? (also she sometimes sends me nudes and i constantly mess up while trying to react like a normal person to them. one time i just replied asking whether she bought new shower curtains and then spent the next couple of minutes banging my head against the wall because even my asexual ass realised that that was probably the wrong thing to say)

anyways...

well, it's definitely different this year, celebrating christmas, but it's still fun, christmas eve went well and i'm pretty excited for christmas breakfast tomorrow, because it's always my favorite part! so yeah! thank you, that was very nice! ❤️

excellent, if halloween was a thing here i’d take that into account and add it to my vampire costume. halloween is not a thing here though so i guess i’ll just wear it down to the shops with some vamp teeth idk. also that sounds incredible. i love obnoxiously bright things. if it hurts people’s eyes then i’m doing something right. i am going against the masses and saying i love it.

i know right? he was from Germany, I think, and possibly quite new to the country and the nz education system (or at least, we...didn’t really learn anything that year...he just kind of let us play on the computers a lot...it must’ve been his first year teaching) so maybe he just figured that was chill in nz schools. a fair enough assumption considering the chaos of children.

oh geez. that does not sound good. at least you haven’t had to go to hospital yet though, that’s a plus. but it does sound awfully unlucky. it seems that whenever i come near a knife i find a cut on me afterwards. not like, a big cut. not even a cut that bleeds, normally. but just like the tiniest shallow cut ever. I have no idea how I manage it each time. it’s not b a d exactly it’s just alarming that i never notice it at the time. I also get a bit of double vision sometimes and I’ve noticed that when I’m trying to cut something precisely like vegetables I’ll struggle to see exactly where the knife is and well...I just go very slow and keep my fingers far away. I don’t trust my eyesight one bit. very impressive that you manage to break the KNIFE though, I��ve never done that. Bent many spoons real bad in my time tryna get ice cream but no knife deconstruction here.

oh yeah! they did. I figured it was just a normal thing to teach in nz high schools and I was like wow. sure is great here! uhhh turns out no. Once I hit uni and took a gender and sexuality class and spoke with my classmates, it turned out that very very VERY few of them ever had that kind of thing brought up in health class. Hell, some of them were like we basically got taught abstinence (although they mostly then pointed to the religious nature of their schools, I guess that’s a trend). I was a little shocked some schools skipped sex ed that bad. Then earlier this year I did some research into the nz health curriculum for a presentation for an english class and like. it’s IN the curriculum. if you dig deep enough for this info. It’s just that what’s in the curriculum isn’t exactly compulsory. Which is a problem. Because then it only gets taught if the teacher decides to. For example, my younger sister (by roughly 3 years) attended the same high school as me but she never got any discussion of sexualities or gender identities or whatever in health class. It comes down to the teacher and I hate that so much. it SHOULD be taught to everyone, everywhere, it sure did help me. ANYWAY. i’ve already gone on this rant many times I will stop here

I’m glad it’s not just me in this boat haha. platonic...romantic...i mean who really knows the difference until it’s been 6 months and actually, now that you think about it, maybe there’s something funny going on here. o h n o. what lovely shower curtains! where’d you get them? oh n o. i feel like i’ve been sent a nude once before by a straight friend (who was a girl) who did not know I was queer and I was. how do straight people respond to this. respectfully i am looking only at your face so i don’t make you uncomfortable is actually not what i should be doing here, clearly. you...sure do have a body...good job! that’s...some good looking flesh! i- thank god this has never happened again. i would not be any better.

I’m glad you still had fun and I hope the breakfast ended up going well! A Christmas breakfast sounds interesting. I feel that’s a whole different area of foods to make something nice out of, I’m so used to special lunches and literally nothing else, breakfast foods seem fun.

#sorry for the late reply! it's been a busy couple of days and i've been a bit drained #also despite that my health class was like ok let's split into boys and girls #girls what do u find attractive about boys and vice versa #brainstorm it!#and the girls group gathered up and started saying stuff and i just #uhhh...chest? is that...is that a thing we like about men...?#i think at the time i genuinely did ask my group are boys chests attractive #dkfjhskdjfhsdf gee whiz i wonder what lindsey's sexuality is #anyway different subject #i would love a special breakfast on christmas but with my acid reflux i can't really eat anything for breakfast #a single bit of toast with peanut butter is what i have every single day of the year lmaoo #at least it sits in my stomach okay #come lunch i'm good to eat normally which is nice #no one ask me how many mini quiches i ate today i lost count #i ate so many #it's a problem #Anonymous

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1899-newsboy-strike · 5 years

Text

No One Knows - Racetrack Higgins Imagine

Requested: Idk if ur still doing asks but maybe race x girl reader who is hiding out as a boy newsie and she only trusts race with her secret. The guys begin to notice that race hangs around the reader a lot and that he (she) typically gets flustered around him. It's only when race won't let someone go into the bathroom while she's changing that one of the boys (specs or davey probably) puts two and two together (and then they ship the reader and race ;))))

Warnings: none?

-----------------------------------

You became a newsie a few years ago, and knowing how people were, you thought it’d be best to pretend you were a boy. You thought that if you looked like a girl then people wouldn’t even dare buy papers from you. You knew it would be hard to hide all of your hair, so you found a pair of rusty old scissors and cut your hair the best you could. All the years you had kept the secret from everyone, everyone except your most trusted friend and selling partner Race. You still remembered the day you had told him like it was yesterday.

You had finished selling early, on your way over to the racetracks you were trying to muster up the courage to tell Race what you wanted to tell him when you got there. You trusted Race with your life, but there was still a part of you that was scared how he’d react. You patiently waited outside for him rehearsing in your head what you were going to say. “Hey Mouse, sold all your papes already?” Race asked while he walked up to you. “Yeah. Race, I’s got somethin’ I wanna tell you.” You explained, your voice shaky. “What is it? You okay?” He asked, getting worried due to the look on your face.

“Yeah I’s fine. You can’t tell the others what I’s gonna tell you.” You explained, sitting and motioning for him to sit down next to you. “I’s promise I ain’t gonna tell no one.” Race reassures you making you give a small smile, your nerves going away slightly. “My name’s Y/N. I’s a goil.” You explained, your heart beating out of your chest searching for any reaction from Race. “That’s it? You’s don’t gotta worry about it Y/N. I ain’t gonna tell the others. How come you’s pretending to be a goil?” He asked, scooting closer to you, his head resting on his bent knees while he stared at you in interest.

“I ain’t gonna sell as many papers as I do with people knowin’. It’s hard enough already. I’s don’t need somethin’ else makin’ it harder.” You explained, earning an understanding nod from Race. “Do any of the others know?” He asked, both of you finally making your way back to the lodging house. “No, just you. I’s trust you to keep it to yourself. I’s just wanted someone to know, sometimes it’s hard hidin’ it if I ain’t got any help.” You explained turning your head so he wouldn’t see the blush on your face. “Well, you’s got help now.” He smiled over to you, continuing asking you a million questions on your way back.

After that day you and Race were closer than ever. You felt like your friendship had been taken to another level with the trust you were putting in him and the way you both started acting around each other. Now that he knew, you started to act different around him, feeling more comfortable enough to be yourself, finally not trying to act like the rest of the boys. You weren’t the only one who started acting different, Race started to hang out with you more than you normally would. You couldn’t help but develop a crush on your selling partner, and it made it hard to act normal around him.

The new behavior didn’t go unnoticed by the rest of the boys. They always knew you and Race were close, but you seemed closer than ever now. No one could put their finger on it, always trying to figure out what it was. Once your crush on Race started to grow, you began to get flustered whenever you were with Race, you’d even blush at the mere mention of his name. Everyone began to think that maybe the both of you were together, no one mentioning anything thinking that the both of you wanted to keep it a secret. That was until one particular day that you hadn’t gotten the chance to change while the boys were asleep, asking Race to help you keep the boys out of the restroom until you were done.

“Hey, Davey where you goin’?” Race asked when he saw Davey start making his way toward him and the restroom. “Gonna go before selling.” He motioned toward the restroom. “No!” Race exclaimed a little too quickly, earning a strange look from Davey. “Um, how are you Davey? We ain’t leavin’ for a while… you can go then.” Race explained trying to come up with anything to stall Davey. “I’m fine… why are you asking?” He asked as he gave Race a weird look. “Good that’s good. So how’s sellin’ been goin’ for you?” Race asked stepping in between Davey and the door to the restroom. Before Davey could answer the door to the restroom opened, you finally walking out.

Davey looked from you to Race, a smile appearing on his face as he finally put all the pieces together. Davey made his way past the both of you, thinking about confronting you or telling the others. “About time, I’s couldn’t think of what to tell Davey.” Race explained while you sat on the floor to put your shoes on. “Sorry, I’s didn’t wake up on time.” You apologized before grabbing Race’s hand to stand up. You brushed yourself off grabbing your hat slapping it on before grabbing your money to put in your pocket. “Hey Mouse! Can I talk to you?” You heard a voice from behind you. You looked to see Davey standing close behind and nodded as you walked over to him.

“Somethin’ wrong?” You asked, looking up at him. “No, everything’s fine. I wanted to talk about you and Race. About what you’re both hiding.” He explained, making your heart beat pick up. “I… What are you talkin’ ‘bout Davey?” You let out an awkward laugh. “We all knew you both were hiding something, you’ve been acting weird. I just didn’t think it was that you were a girl.” He explained making you stare up at him with wide eyes. “I- You- You can’t tell anyone!” You exclaimed. “Why? None of the boys will care. They’re going to catch on eventually, wouldn’t it be better if you told them yourself?” He asked making you sigh. “I’s gotta think about it.” You explained, earning a pat on the shoulder from Davey before parting ways.

You thought about it, for days, and then weeks. When you finally told the boys, you didn’t know why you waited so long. They didn’t really treat you any differently and kept your secret from anyone outside of the lodging house. It also didn’t take long for the boys to wait for you and Race to get together. You had let it slip to Davey that you had a crush on Race, and then Davey let it slip to everyone else about your crush. Race had even confessed that he had feelings for you, neither of you seemed to notice the feelings you had toward one another.

“You gonna tell him?” Davey asked after finding you staring at Race yet again. “No. You’s crazy.” You laughed at him shaking your head. “You should, I’m sure he likes you too.” Davey smiled at you leaving out the part about knowing Race’s feelings for you. “Yeah, Race likin’ me. That’s funny.” You laughed sarcastically. “You won’t know until you tell him.” He explained earning a frustrated sigh from you. “Davey I’s bet you he don’t like me.” You said, never taking your eyes off of Race, and he looked over giving you a small smile before going back to do whatever he was doing. “Okay, let’s find out. A penny.” Davey explained reaching in his pocket, tossing you a coin before making his way over to Race. “Davey!” You shouted out chasing after him, both of you running around the lodging house earning laughs from everyone.

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exid-though · 5 years

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I’m new to exid and kinda confused, can you help me with the girls’ names/nicknames?

YEAH okay so

Solji the beautiful siren with the chubbiest cheeks in the world and the prettiest lips known to man was born Heo Solji and she just goes by Solji but because she’s the mom of the group since she’s the leader and is really caring and cuddly but also can be scary she gets called lots of “mom/mother” nicknames like the girls straight up address her as “mom” a lot during Showtime EXID like literally instead of Solji they would often yell “mom” to get her attention it’s adorable. And ofc fans call her mom for the same reason so like Heo Mother/Mama is something we say a lot, “mama Solji”, etc. Soul.G was her DJ name or something like that? some type of stage name years ago but now she does just use Solji. Heo Bad Gas was something that existed like years ago from way back in like 2012/2013 because when they dieted and ate boiled eggs she got really bad gas. They mentioned it during the first season of BUTBUT TV but don’t actually use this often? It was really just a let’s make fun of each other thing for the moment ips? Mostly just things having to do with mom and also Baby Heo she’s said before is one of her favorite nicknames of hers. I mean she is straight up the cutest woman in the world and she’s the youngest in her family so Baby Heo somehow fits her like just as much as mama Solji and all those. ummm when she first debuted she introduced herself as “EXID’s Honey Vocal” for obvious reasons come on and I tag her memether I think? don’t I lol? yeah anyway cause she’s their mother and she’s obsessed with memes, the other members (Hyelin I think but maybe Elly idk??) revealed that Solji sends tons of memes to their group chat. She’s also nicknamed Tweety I forgot about that one cause she looks like Tweety lol and the girls said she looks like Piglet too. And the animal she looks most like is a sloth? that was also lowkey about her being tired all the time while she was sick though so idk if that’s entirely fair lol. A koala is another one that one’s more fair too lol we’ll go with koala.

LE is the rapper ofc her real name/birth name is Ahn Hyo-Jin and her English name is Ahn Elly. When she was an underground rapper before she joined EXID she chose Elly as her stage name which is also why some people get confused and say “Elly is her old stage name not her name/english name/etc” but it was/is her English name she confirmed it on an early season of BUTBUT TV when talking with Hani, her name on instagram is also literally “ellybaby” and “Ahn Elly” like she only really seems to use LE as a stage name and people call her both Elly and Hyojin off stage cause both are right ig? But yeah so LE is LE, Elly, and Hyojin all and then when you get into nicknames and not just like other names ig? she got nicknamed Elsa after Frozen’s Elsa a while ago cause she looks like her lol. Daisy Duck also because she looks like Daisy Duck but I haven’t heard anyone use that in a long time? “Elly/LE baby” or “Elly/LE baby the crazy” is a nickname that’s a reference to a line she had in a song where she started her verse with “elly baby the crazy”. I tag her euterpe because that’s the muse of lyric poetry and Elly writes all of EXID’s songs to date and has written for other artists as well. She’s so cool. She’s the “Tom” to Jeonghwa’s “Jerry” because she’s like a grumpy cat that likes to beat up Jeonghwa the mischievous mouse. idk what else? She’s the dad of the group like Solji is the mom? Oh and she first introduced herself as the group’s “Charisma” just like Solji is the group’s “Honey Vocal” and it makes sense cause she’s scary af. Or at least it seems until you realize she’s a giant softy and cries just as easily as Heo “crybaby” Solji herself.

Hani’s real name is Ahn Hee-Yeon, but she does mostly go by Hani. In the same episode of BUTBUT TV (I really wish I had screenshots I mean I might but I don’t think I do but like idk someone will find it eventually) that Elly said Elly was her English name, Hani said that around the time she was born (I think it was either that or right before or right after or maybe just before?? so just know that at some point lol) her parents lived in the US and they liked calling her Hani/Honey growing up cause it’s their favorite American/English term of endearment and she mentioned even family and friends call her Hani more often than they call her Heeyeon normally but they’ve also seemed to be calling her Heeyeon more often and that was a while ago so maybe she’s just moving from it a bit? Or they’re just like eh we need to call you Heeyeon to properly yell at you when you do creepy shit. She was nicknamed Ms. Puff a long time ago during like their debut year because of her hair and face at the time she looked like Ms Puff. She was first introduced as the group’s “Brain” because she’s super smart, has a high IQ, enjoys studying/studies really well. She’s also very meticulous and perfectionistic? don’t know if that’s a word but you get it. So generally she’s a giant nerd she also literally wasn’t/isn’t a good dancer so she takes notes on what exact angles and movements make her look best while dancing and it’s clearly worked out well since a video of her dancing saved the group from disbandment lol. Because of that video too she’s nicknamed “Fancam Goddess” by like media people and stuff in Korea. She’s nicknamed Ahn Hyung by a lot of people because she’s “manly” or whatever. Which she isn’t really she’s just awkward and likes girls. And she’s good at sports but like Sistar are sports goddesses and they’re not called manly like Heeyeon is it’s just a combination of her being awkward and sporty and chill and people thinking that’s not feminine so it must be manly. anyway. She actually doesn’t seem to mind that much and embraces that nickname a lot and EXID as a group go with the jokes about them being more like a boy group than a girl group because they’re all such dorks who don’t know how to protect an image so it’s not really as annoying to me at all as it would be should any of them esp Hani have ever said they thought it was dumb. moving on though cause that’s a whole other topic. So she was actually originally “EXID’s Brain” from debut and onward a bit until she started introducing herself as EXID’s “Brain and Rose” because she thinks she’s as beautiful as a rose/a rose fits her really well and that over the years changed to her just introducing herself as “EXID’s Rose”. This was literally her own braggy decision and that’s why you might see someone say she and Elly too actually are the braggy members of the group bc like they are?? Heeyeon can’t stop complimenting herself and Elly literally said there’s nothing she can’t do but we stan confident queens who know their self worth. always.

Hyelin is the cute little small baby one who’s absolutely wild and uncontrollable so she is either called something cute like her original introduction being “EXID’s Cutie” (but I also remember her being “EXID’s Cute Bad Girl” around 2012/2013 idk why but like I remember that being a thing she said and not just cutie idk) or “My Way Lini”/”My Way Hyelin” because she just does what she wants. Like she’s the second youngest (oh yeah fake maknae too that’s a thing ig?) but who can really ever be mad at Lini? She curses on national television and their own leader is laughing about it she does what she wants and she gets away with what she wants. She not only curses and uses slang and dialect a lot but she also kinda just… generally says what she wants. She openly stated her eyebrows were tattooed, talked about what plastic surgeries each member should get, allegedly picked up a microphone at a show cause she heard fans talking shit and literally said “to all the fans of monsta x, we aren’t dating” and like??? that’s not something she wouldn’t do so who’s gonna deny that really? She just can’t control her mouth and doesn’t actually seem to want to really? so “my way Lini” fits her really well. She’s nicknamed Lini cause it’s just a cute nickname for Hyelin, Hyelini is also a thing. JjeopJjeop/jjeopjjeopi is a nickname that comes from her chewing really loudly/obnoxiously when she eats. Him Hyelini cause she’s super strong (like stronger than she should be where’d you get your superpowers lini baby??). Him means strong btw it’s not another manly joke. She’s a good wrestler and beats their own manager at those arcade punching games. Baby bird because she looks like/is like EXID’s little baby birdy. she’s cute and small and they love her sm. Her English name is Jenny but no one ever calls her Jenny lol? Voldemort is a good one that comes from her famous impressions of Voldemort (her Voldemort sunbaenim)

Jeonghwa is nicknamed “maeboli” most famously I think?because she likes to do things that she knows will bother the older members and she literally is always asking for a beating. A radio dj asked for some clarification on this once and Jeonghwa just said “this isn’t a misunderstanding at all, I really do that” like the girl just enjoys making people chase her around and yell at her. It’s funniest when paired with Elly’s personality because she and Elly are the “Tom and Jerry” of EXID. They’re constantly chasing each other around and Elly is Jeonghwa’s favorite victim and vice versa cause Elly keeps fake bugs in her purse to scare Jeonghwa with. they’re just such dorks idk what to say. Jeonghwa purposefully is really loud and her voice is really high-pitched and she uses it to get on the girls nerves. She’s also called “EXID’s Sunflower” by fans sometimes because her and Heeyeon are the visuals of EXID and she’s more of the bright tall cheerful etc sunflower. She’s also called “pure visual” of EXID because her visuals/looks whatever are veery “pure” and innocent looking she’s got sparkly eyes and she’s just generally got a really friendly and innocent look esp compared to Heeyeon’s sharp and sexy look so the sunflower vs rose and pure vs sexy visual thing is probably why they’re both officially the visuals of EXID like imagine choosing between the two of them anyway. She gets called lady and princess Jjong/Park/Jeonghwa a lot cause she’s basically the “most lady-like” out of the members (or so it seems). and she just looks like a pretty lady with her pretty eyes and round face and her long ass limbs that make her the size of a tree. she got called a monkey sometimes during like Showtime years beause of her limbs too lol she’s got long arms and a small face and so she looks like one of those cute little monkeys I forgot what kind though. Merida was a nickname that started and ended with her orange hair from 2017 when they promoted Eclipse but she’s still merida in my tags just cause I still haven’t changed it. I’ll do it eventually. ummmm?? She was apparently Park Foot Odor for some time around debut but she denies this whole thing. That was from the same episode of BUTBUT TV where Solji’s gas and Elly being dirty was talked about too. Also we call her Jjong a lot just like how we call Hyelin Lini.

There’s definitely more but like I can’t think of them rn? Sorry.

#i had to put a read more cause it was so long sorry lmao #exid

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