#i haven’t read it but I really want too! such cute illustrations but poor little guy seems so scared according to what u tell me :(

[happyheidi]

"Owl at Home" by Arnold Lobel is a whole mood

#the teaRpot! #chilling by the fire and suddenly sad n scared(?) poor thing :( #don’t be sad little owlie <3 #still a mood tho #cottagecore #owls #birds #i haven’t read it but I really want too! such cute illustrations but poor little guy seems so scared according to what u tell me :( #animals #illustrations #owl at home #arnold lobel #childrens books #brown aesthetic

[mego42]

Shamelessly stealing @foxmagpie​’s monthly rec thing without the ability to get my life together to do these on a monthly basis so, seasonal recs! So excited to see if I manage to do this again with anything remotely resembling consistency but i’ve been keeping the notes for approximately 43 years (or since ~september, whatever that means) so by god i’m gonna use them. 

found my thrill - s_t_c_s / @sothischickshe​

Turner POV!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

guys turner is SO OBSESSED with Beth and Rio

both canonically and in this fic

it’s gr9

also features a weirdly soothing and relatable cord untangling moment as a metaphor

truly disturbingly relatable turner pov tbh

relentless boomer disdain, always a plus

led to the creation of this monstrosity, not sure what kind of a monster would do that

War In My Mind - mintletters16

Backread!!!!

post-213, gorgeous character study 

guaranteed to make you feEl stUfF

I really love the like, cyclical, fractured pattern of Beth’s internal monologue, it gives the whole thing a really affecting at times dreamy, at times haunted vibe

the end twist is *chef’s kiss*

mourning bells - Ejunkiet / @ejunkiet​

Backread!!!!

Later s2 era, Rio’s at a funeral, gets drunk and calls Beth

V short, kind of…..mmm, not sweet, but almost? Idk

It’s got a wistful sort of almost/i can be quiet with you vibe that i go extremely bonkers for

delinquents - foxmagpie / @foxmagpie​

Lol are any of you actually not reading this yet?

g o d ch 8 where do i start

First off how ABSOLUTELY VERY DARE for the tragic angst that is delinquents!beth boland. This poor baby, this precious bean. MUST PROTEC

SHE’S TRYING HER BEST AND I LOVE HER

zero percent deserves dean’s clammy hands, no i have not forgotten, tattooed on my brain, will never forgive

I also love love love love LOVE the ruby/stan subplot happening

(and ruby’s mom!!!!!) (seriously though you write the best moms)

oh god and baby beth starting to have confusing feelings about rio?????? *chef’s kiss*

p sure i was just like, straight screaming the entire end of the chapter

the dugout is like, pure serotonin

I can’t even talk about the closet

tHe teNsiOn

thank you i will take eleventy billion

don't give it a hand, offer it a soul - medievalraven / @medievalraven

am a desperate heaux for any fic that features rio and mick friendship

you are all incredibly shocked i know

still would not be mad if this swerved into rio x mick fake dating but beth x rio is cool too i guess

Speaking of things i am a desperate heaux for: DIANE!!!!!!!!

and DATING ANNIE???????????? Blessed

honestly this fic is worth it purely for the assertion that mick watches queer eye

Why don't we go to Venus? - watermelonriddles / @bensonstablers​

another grief study! 

apparently i was working through some stuff in september, idk, that was like 4 years ago

considering it’s the premise of the fic, i don’t think it’s a spoiler to say this fic is canon divergent and working with the premise that rio killed beth in 302

he is uh, not coping well

extremely haunted you might say

lots of marcus and rhea which is a delight!

rhea is to good for him tbh

i said what i said

truly top notch dream (nightmare?) sequences

the conversation at the end is extremely uncalled for

drop the game - Ejunkiet / @ejunkiet​

Backread!!!!

Am going to die mad Beth and Rio didn’t hook up in 211 but luckily this fic scratched the itch 

(temporarily, it’s a fairly permanent itch)

Bonus rec: missing scene series i wanna do bad things to you featuring 2x02 and 2x04

Viva Voce - zetuslapetus / @querenaxx​

Whoops we woke up married Vegas shenanigans!! 

So cute!!!!! So sexy!!!!! 

What more do you want?

am desperately obsessed with how beth can’t help stalking rio

feels right, feels organic

this makes me feel a lot of stuff about how they could be without their canon garbage between them

🎶 we could’ve had it aaaaaaaaaaall 🎶

you showed me colors (i can't see them with anyone else) - gild_fire / @gild-and-fire​

really into the use of color to illustrate beth’s emotional state, i feel like there’s a word for that but idk what it is

UNIMPORTANT

really nice job capturing beth’s inner vulnerability balanced by her outer stubbornness

am DESPERATELY into Mick playing matchmaker

more please???????

Both Sides of the Law - JoeyLee / @joeyjoeylee​

LAW SCHOOL AU! I suuuuuuper love Beth and Rio here (alt pov!! a gift!!!!) I love how initially prickly they are, I love how it’s evolving into a grudging respect, I love how INCREDIBLY AND HILARIOUSLY OBSESSED WITH EACH OTHER THEY ARE and neither one of them seems to see it

listen I know we’re all already foaming at the mouth over this one but as it’s gonna go down as one of my all time favorites it bears repeating/rereccing

cannot stress enough how masterful the use of POV is here, both voices feel completely true and distinct and I love how the alternating chapters revisit, reveal and emphasize pieces of each other

i can’t talk about this fic without hyperventilating

I LOVE IT SO MUCH YOU GUYS

the slow burn is going to ACTUALLY KILL ME

rip, no regrats

Earned It - wakeupflawless / @wakeupflawless​

spanking

that’s it that’s the pitch

H O T

living for beth’s exit in the first chapter, rio and i are both incredibly into it

second chapter also features violently possessive Rio who cannot deal with anyone messing with his girl so if that’s your thing boy howdy get on it

shake, baby, shake - openhearts

backread!!!!!

according to my bookmarks this was a reread but ???????

must’ve read it in the fugue state that followed reading for a moment we were strangers which is gr9 and I believe I have recced it before. If not, horrible oversight, reccing it now

beth and Rio POV lead up to the bathroom break, beautifully done, low-key feel bad reccing it bc the end point of both chapters makes me want to throw things but it’s super worth it for the tEnsiOn. ENJOY

What the Sea Wants, the Sea Will Have - flashindie / @pynkhues​

I’m assuming all of y’all are already reading this

If not OH MY GOD FIX YOUR LIVES

P I R A T E  A U

I’m sorry maybe you didn’t hear me piRaTE aU

meticulously researched, brain-meltingly vibrant, already painfully sexy slow-burning PIRATE AU

god where to start okay so first off, the world-building here straight up breaks my brain, sophie’s put in the work and it SHOWS

second, the atmosphere. i’m generally a pretty like, vague mental picture sort of reader but the sensory detail here grabs you by the throat and like, forcibly hauls you in whether your brain’s wired that way or no

and hey speaking of throats if you, like me, go a little funny about the knees at the idea of beth holding a knife to rio’s throat (he’s fine, calm down), there’s a v excellent beth-in-a-barrel moment for you

oh christ and the sexy tension

it’s gonna be a race to see which slow burn takes me out first, this or law school

Stunner - foxmagpie / @foxmagpie​

Another high school AU, this time with baby Rio absolutely head over heels for his older sister’s bff

stunner!Rio has an emotional earnestness about him that I feel like delinquents!Rio has already outgrown and it’s so SWEET I can’t get enough

Desperately cute!!!!!!

alL he waNts iS foR beTh tO bE hiS girL

also unreasonably angsty???????

ANN ARBOR IS NOT THAT FAR MEGAN

A Heart's A Heavy Burden - tooshyforthis / @bathroombreaks​

Howl’s Moving Castle AU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I love Howl’s!!!!!!!!!!!

perfect opp to roast Rio for being a Dramatique Heaux 

and it’s gonna be 9 chapters?????? H Y P E

author’s note boldly presumes I did not know I needed this AU when the reality is I did in fact know I needed this AU, I just wasn’t expecting anyone to deliver

so blessed

author also claims to not be team nose stud and yet it features prominently in all its magnificent glory

what is the truth dot gif

A Bit of a Stretch - septiembre / @septiembur​

SO????? CUTE?????????

would be on this list for Rio calling Beth E alone tbh

really really really really really love this Rio POV of being settled into a relationship with Beth

It manages to be sweetly domestic af while still holding the edge that makes brio brio which is a neat trick

@septiembur may be a witch

beth’s approach to getting rio to do yoga with her is hilarious and exactly right, canon-typical amounts of subtlety 

1000000/10

Post Break-Up Sex - femalegothic / @bethsuglywigs​

stg this was called Hit Shuffle

no matter

h O T

with a side of damn i’ve made some questionable choices in my life haven’t i introspection

(no regrats tho)

(esp not with this fic)

not the point of the fic by a long shot but i’m also extremely obsessed with Weed Eddie, so real

She drains my soul... she drains it not - niham87 / @niham87​

ABSOLUTELY OBSESSED WITH THIS CONCEPT

am a complete sucker for paranormal world building that satirizes bureaucracy 

Is that a trope? If so that’s my favorite

I did it. I’m picking a single favorite. You know what that is growth dot gif

ANYWAY i love the concept, i love the humor, i love beth instantly clicking with annie

I love her and mick’s sort of grudging professional courtesy

Love beth as a champion of environmental responsibility and all of the underworld being like …...okay??

cannot wait to see where this goes

Nine-Tenths - riosnecktattoo / @riosnecktattoo​

*INCOHERENT PTERODACTYL SCREECHING*

sometimes i think about rio putting beth’s hair in a ponytail and have to go lie down

science please explain why this rUinS mE

wait hold on i skipped ahead

HEY KIDS DO YOU LIKE UNBEARABLY CUTE DOMESTIC TENDERNESS

opens with rio sleepily holding beth’s hand to his heart so that’s the kind of thing you’ll be dealing with

uGH theY’RE sO CUTe

idk why precisely but rio adding hair ties to his bracelet collection is my undoing every time

Missed Call - foxmagpie / @foxmagpie​

Rio doesn’t come home from a job when he’s supposed to. Beth (and I!!!!!!!) slowly loses her mind

Truly a masterpiece of rising tension

Will literally never forgive her for calling this light angst

I was SO STRESSED OUT

The first person to point out there was an author’s note at the beginning I obvs didn’t read is getting blocked

crush - foxmagpie / @foxmagpie​

Listen even though this is centered around two OCs, they are OCs FROM a (n iconic) brio fic AND Beth, Ruby and Rio all make cameos (I mean, Rio’s pretty present since he lives in Mar’s mind rent free bc they are THE SWEETEST MOST ADORABLE BEST OF FRIENDS so idk if i’d call it a cameo but whatever)

and even if it didn’t feature any official GG characters I’d still rec is bc that’s mY SON AND this fic is TOO CUTE

I have so many feelings over mar and rio growing up and not knowing how to cope with girls becoming a Thing in their life and how it affects their friendship and mar feeling left behind but (SPOILERS) at the end of the story rio starts feeling that too and it’s so poignant knowing how that’s going to continue in delinquents

while mar may be my son, i also claim elena’s #1 stan status

before you’re like meg you’re only reccing it bc it’s a bday present ask yourselves do i really strike you as the kind of person that wouldn’t be equally obnoxious about this either way?

truly cannot fathom how hard i have fallen for these OCs i don’t normally do that

@foxmagpie is definitely a witch

The Ottoman - Niham87 / @niham87​

look i will be the first to admit that i don’t go near as bonkers over the ottoman line in 308 as y’all do

(don’t get me wrong, i love it!!! I love that he laughs and i love that she’s pleased it just doesn’t hit my lose my whole mind button like idk, the dubby or the 306 convo, idk why)

BUT i v v v much love the context this delightful Rio POV pwp gives it

am also absolutely feral for 209 missing scene fic

and anything that captures the complexity of Rio’s s3 feelings for Beth and how twisted they’ve become

so this scratches a bunch of itches, is what i’m trying to say

Bet On It - zetuslapetus / @querenaxx​

*INCOHERENT PTERODACTYL SCREECHING*

That’s what my brain does when I think about Beth and Rio meeting in ch 1

am DESPERATELY OBSESSED WITH the tension between the two of them in this fic

I love how it plays with the ways they have to rely on but don’t trust each other

plus FAKE DATING and BED SHARING (fair warning hasn’t happened yet but the set up is there)

originally supposed to be 2 chapters, already up to 4, prayer circle it goes on forever

do you like drugs (tonight) - s_t_c_s / @sothischickshe​

v important focus on hydration, other fic should take note

extremely about the use of cut to and then flashback to enhance the ‘we were on drugs’ vibe

speaking of, beth and rio absolutely would take ecstasy to prove they are fun bc they are the exact kind of idiots that would peer pressure themselves

so glad beth kept her purse, got a bit stressed there for a second, clutches in that kind of circumstance are A Risk

not that i would know

FLAWLESS USE OF VOICEMAIL TBH

really love the ongoing denial that they are remotely into each other while proceeding to demonstrate how they are in fact, extremely into each other, great vibe

rio dances

I know my brain broke too

mmmm bacon

Navigate A Broken Path - flashindie / @pynkhues​

*INCOHERENT PTERODACTYL SCREECHING*

I have a long standing tradition of getting unreasonably obsessed with side characters so i’m not like, entirely surprised by how obsessed i am with both Mick and Mary Pat but i never in a million years considered them as a ship

AND Y E T

they fit????? so perfectly?????? It’s amazing how she developes them individually enough that i look at them together and think ah yes this makes perfect sense for both characters

and they’re such an amazing foil to Beth and Rio? 

can ships have foils? do i know what a foil is? 

unimportant

GUYS you dON’T uNDERStAN d 

hell i don’t understand

how absolutely very dare you make me care about YET ANOTHER set of gg ‘verse children

do not read this fic if you have no interest in feelings you zero percent asked for

wHA t hAPPeNED iN aLASkA?????????

A Moment’s Silence - femalegothic / @bethsuglywigs​

*makes sign of the cross*

y’all are gonna make me rediscover religion

extremely appreciate the author’s note approach to backstory top notch prioritization

listen it’s basically 3k of beth deep throating rio idk what more you need me to say about it

it is…..good stuff

bless the kinkmeme or fest whatever we’re calling it

praise - civillove / @blainesebastian​

I mean you had me at “three times rio calls beth a good girl and one time he really means it”

ephemeral rio

I left that note for myself in here in the middle of the night and haven’t the foggiest what i was thinking but i stand by it none the less

okay okay i think i know what i meant, this fic (as do all of my fav civillove brio fics) has this sort of like, liminal, in the quiet moments feel to them that makes the moments and feelings somehow feel like i’m catching a glimpse of something secret and precious???

idk i just really like it okay

Heart and Soul - riosnecktattoo / @riosnecktattoo​

oh look more unbearably sweet domestic tenderness, this time to music

thank you ma’am for my life

rio remembers beth used to play piano and gets her one and revoltingly cute shenanigans result

also hilarity

and sexiness

this fic has it all, truly

shout out to mick who sees no reason to keep rio’s feelings to himself

good girls tumblr fic - prettylittlementirosa / @hypermania​​

cheating and reccing a whole series

It’s my list and i can do what i wanna

stop crying about it, it’s four fics and they’re all AMAZING absolutely impossible to pick a fav

truly flawless characterization, next level ability to capture evocative mood, cannot get enough

three’s a crowd: who knew ballroom dancing while dean watches and grinds his teeth could be so sexy 

(trick question everything about that premise sounds A++++ and boy howdy does it live up)

feel it on the way home: rio tries to break up with beth, it goes about as well as you’d expect

(thE angSty tenSioN)

i want to play the game: [from the floor] i’m still not ready to talk about it

(rio/turner, missing scene, 10000000% a taste of what went down in that hotel room)

june after dark: pitch perfect annie pov, really really love the take that Annie is the baby whisperer, can’t fully explain why but it feels incredibly right

(ANNIE X NANCY COULD WORK SO WELL YOU GUYS)

#fingers crossed these links are right i did not double check #i like to live on the edge #truly mind boggling amount of fluff on this list i surprised myself on that one #no i will not at any point get my shit together enough to write out thoughtful commentary this is a shit posting blog first last and always #fic recs #gg fic #nbc good girls #i'll come up with a tag for these if i ever do them again #check back 37 years from now #or ~~~~~~march #whatever that means

[ae0nx]

FRUITS BASKET S3 EPISODE 1 + 2 RECAP!

Yayyy! Season 3! Finally! I’m hoping this season will make me understand/sympathise with Akito and maybe even Shigure a little bit more because... honestly? My opinions on episode 2?... I might get some flack for my opinions on them...  😬

But, first: I’d like to appreciate how on the Funimation app we got a little interview/message from a few of the english dub VAs! Specifically Colleen Clinkenbeard, Jerry Jewell, Eric Vale, Ian Sinclair and Brina Palencia (Akito, Kyo, Yuki, Kureno and Isuzu). And it was nice seeing some of their opinions of the characters they play and how much they’re emotionally invested in the story. (Ian’s such a nerd ‘I wanna see giant mechs later this season’ 😂 - I lowkey stan him lol)

You should definitely check it out if you’re interested in what they would have to say!

ANYWAYS, let’s get into it...

---------------------------------------------------------------

EPISODE 1

I really love this depiction of the original zodiac and how you can just tell from the tone of the scene how desperately the God of the Zodiac was clinging on to these connections that they had with the participants in the banquet. How much they clung on to and loved the cat... Also, interesting how Tohru’s narrating this scene... almost like she can relate to the desperation of wanting to keep things the same... but we’ll get to that later. But also, Tohru is a God

This new opening is beautiful, I love the way that camera moves around the still illustrations and how the general tone just hammers down that... this season is gonna be some real shit lol (which makes me nervous for the opening for the second half 😳). It’s so warped and the general blue, grey and black tone that follows around every Akito scene we get in the anime has bled into every scene in this opening concerning the rest of the zodiac. Almost... like something is decaying. It’s great, it’s just very sad lol. I love the song tho, issa bop.

One of my favourite things in stories is when we get a bigger villain than the ‘pronounced’ villain of the story. Ren’s introduction through a manicured outstretched hand towards Kureno and Hatori is so weirdly gross in what it insinuates (especially when you apply her connection with Shigure) but again... I wanna know why she’s such an asshole to Akito specifically besides the bad mental health management within the Sohma compound. I have an inkling of what it is through memory of the manga, but like Akito and Shigure... I just wanna understand why.

Also, Ren is gorgeous and I’m sorry for simping. 

I mean... she’s kinda got a point? She just didn’t need to be so mean about it lol. It’s pretty clear that the connection the zodiac have to each other is real and something they cannot control. BUT, wouldn’t it be easier if this connection wasn’t perpetuated by outer circles of the family and if Akito herself wasn’t so cruel about it? But, I guess Akito - through her relationship with her mother - kinda doesn’t know how to genuinely show love and affection. (Which brings me into my thoughts of how the manga ends and how I kinda... have a few problems with it which I will get to... when that comes lol)

Lol - weeeeeeeee! (flashes back to Tohru being yeeted into the river). Is this a part of Akito’s god-like powers?!

Again. She’s got a point! They’ve both got a point. But, they’re both the source of the problem. It’s really painful to see two mentally ill people duke it out. This whole institution is just rotten.

- I am super curious about what Akira’s relationship was like with the zodiac and if it was just as dark. I’m gonna assume it slightly already was, as the exclusion and degradation of the cat curse is already dark in itself but maybe the rest of the zodiac were just fine with how things were? I dunno if we actually will get the full backstory of Akira and his zodiac but I’m definitely intrigued

Ok, but if four crying children came up to me after I’d just consummated with my partner to reach out at my stomach chanting ‘we’ve been waiting for you’. That would disturb me and scar me for a while too so... 😂. I know it’s supposed to be ethereal and spiritual but... dude, wtf lol

...I don’t like how much I’m into Ren being such a Villain™  😅

- Akito being seen as a crying child by the older zodiac members has always been interesting to me because yes, they could see her as that through mainly the age gap, general empathy and the way she sometimes irrationally acts out. But, also the depiction of Gods being seen as children having tantrums has being reflected in many different beliefs and myths (especially Greek Mythology) and I just like the fact that this all powerful, all knowing being would be compared to a child. It gives you a different perspective on power.

- Is the paper note in the CD case that Kureno gave back to Tohru an extra addition or was it always there?...

Mannnn... I really wanted Isuzu to fuck shit up after seeing Tohru so upset but... *le sigh* (outfit’s still on point)

But, I’m so glad we get an equal Ethereal Goddess to save Tohru! HANAJIMA! We love her, we stan her. <3

- ‘Tohru will be in my custody’ 🤣 I personally think Hana’s bluntness was a kindness in her conversation with Yuki because if I found Tohru upset? I’d automatically start firing metaphorical shots at everyone in that house

- Shigure fearing Hana makes me sleep better at night <3

Hana’s just like ‘hmm... sounds like someone I know... 👀’ I’m here for this parallel between Tohru and Kureno in the hopes that Tohru doesn’t ever get in as bad a situation as Kureno. Ahhh... Kureno... (Also, Laura Bailey was killing it in this scene as always)

- Hmmm... there’s something terribly poetic about Kyo saving Tohru’s scarf from oncoming traffic... but also, Kyo can’t help himself aha

KWEEEN! I love this look for Uo, it’s very Kyoko. I already said this in Season 1 but I STILL need to get wool-lined jacket. Outfit Appreciation goes to her - 3.5 stars.

<3<3<3 Friendship is magic!

- Megumi is such a good egg as always! From him going to get Uo to him being so wise with his outlook on love and how it takes time to really flourish. The best!

- This whole episode ends really nicely from Tohru’s return home and Kyo washing and returning Tohru’s scarf and Yuki being happy to see Tohru and Shigure being somewhat decent. It was nice to get a bit of relief after the tornado of emotions

Also, this was a nice screencap! Even Kyo is smiling!!! :))))

EPISODE 2

*takes sip of wine* ...ok.

👀... later lol

This scene really highlighted how Tohru is starting to see Shigure and the whole zodiac curse in a new and darker way. For the first time, it felt like Tohru was a little bit more guarded around Shigure and I hope they delve more into this season. Her description of her feeling around the curse being like a ‘dark well with no bottom in sight’ is pretty spot on. Ugh.

Aw! Is this the last we’re getting of Small!Momiji?! I love them :3 (Momiji’s shorts look a little shorter too, like he’s growing out of them ahaha)

- I haven’t found the Yuki fan club funny since their first scene in the anime but their poor disguises made me chuckle

- Yayyy! Kyo has an obsessive fan club too? ...Yay?? 😅 haha

- ‘I won’t kill them but they can go to hell’ why is Kyo speaking like me?! 😂

The fact that we got a scene of Yuki kinda admirably looking at a group of friends (boys and girls) playfully physically interacting and he unconsciously reaches out to Machi almost like he forgot about the curse? Heart eyes... 🥰

Again. Relatable. 😂 God, Yuki. You really are an airhead. Bless your soul. <3

And that look says it all. Damn. Kyo’s sense of hopelessness is heartbreaking but I still stand by it being understandable considering his circumstances.

Kyo freaking out about Tohru being visually upset was super cute but I couldn’t even appreciate the fluff because the whole scene had such a morbid tone to it, despite it being so visually romantic:

KYO’S FACE!!! 💔 Ahhh, my emotions!!!! Also, that shot from Tohru’s perspective under her bangs is great.

- Poor Mitsuru, I’d ask for extra pay just for dealing with Shigure’s ass.

Hahah - what a great metaphor!

- Now that Shigure’s ‘true form’, so to speak, has been fully exposed all his comments that are supposed to be teasing come off so much more awful. Him insinuating Mitsuru wasn’t ‘upper class’ enough for Ritsu was awful

COLLLDDDD. AS. IIIIIIICE. But seriously, Shigure this whole episode was cold in many different ways but I definitely felt this personally since I’ve been told something like this by a family member before... 😕 Also, it’s just gross how both Shigure and Akito are taking their own personal issues and mistrust of each other out on to other people. The curse and the institution behind the curse complicates a lot of feelings for sure, but there’s a difference between wrong and right and I get the general feeling that they both are just using the muddy waters to their advantage. Although, I feel like Shigure is taking more advantage of this than Akito but I’ll get into that in a bit.

- There’s also something about this episode that made me sympathise a lot more with Kureno in a more understandable way. But, it also makes me question the ending of this whole story and the resolutions that happen and what life for the whole Sohma institution/family looks like after the curse has broken.. I guess, I should read ‘Fruits Basket Another’ after this, huh?

😳... Shigure is so petty, man. Really?!

So...

I hate this relationship. I’m sorry. I know there are loads of people who like this relationship. And I’m still giving myself space for the show and the story to convince me why it’s worth it. But... I really don’t like this relationship. It’s so toxic. In so many ways. And in a weird way, this scene made me feel a LITTLE bit more for Akito than Shigure. It feels like Shigure gaslights everyone in his life but none no more than Akito, herself. I hate the fact that he keeps saying he loves her while hurting her or disregarding her. You know, almost like he’s treating her like a child. But on the other hand, I hate the fact that Akito has lowkey gaslighted herself into thinking she can treat people however she wants because she is ‘God’. I understand this is part of the way she was brought up and it seems like life in the Sohma compound has been very isolating for her so there’s been no one really to show her better (or have the confidence to show her better). But, at least I can be a little bit more sympathetic on her side than Shigure’s. I dunno... it’s just all very ugly and toxic and I’m hoping that it’ll turn around somehow.

I just hope it’s not one of those relationships that are ‘so good cos it’s so bad’.

...I’ll briefly talk about the ending theme to end this on a good note lol:

I really like this ending! I dunno if they’re gonna have two endings and two openings for this season but this ending definitely feels like it should’ve gone in the second half as it’s almost spoiler-y? But, then again what anime opening and ending isn’t packed with spoilers lol

All the illustrations are gorgeous, I’m assuming they were drawn by Takaya-sensei herself as it seems very much in her current style of artistry but my favourite illustrations are definitely the ones shown above! <3

---------------------------------------------------------

Ahhh! Fin! Sorry, about this one being super long and you probably having to scroll past a whole lot on your dash 😝 As usual, I had a lot to say. I’m open to hearing from people who actually like Shigure and Akito’s relationship btw, it’s just that everything before and episode 2 just really didn’t sail the ship for me, personally. I do want to understand! Haha

See you soooon!

#fruits basket #furuba #fruits basket season 3 #fruits basket 2021

[yeojaa]

didn’t know me.

pairing.  jhs x reader.  rating.  general!  we are family friendly.  tags.  this is just... cute.  there’s a bit of swearing, teasing, mentions of beer, etc. but nothing bad.  wc.  2k.  beta reader.  my beloved @hobi-gif​ and my wofe @periminkle​!  💖

You’ve always been one to take the things you want, pursuing them with a ferocity your mother calls intense.  You have no qualms about decorum or bashfulness.  To you, if you’re not the first - you’re the last. 

You’d done it all your life.  First, in kindergarten, when you’d taken the orange blocks because they were your favourite colour.  Then, in high school when you’d tried out for three varsity teams and made it onto all of them.  More recently, at work, where you’d demanded (read:  gently requested) a raise after you’d consistently been covering for your less-than-reliable manager. 

If you wanted something, you went for it.  There was seldom anything that could stop you - including your soft-spoken best friend. 

“I’m gonna do it.” 

It being asking the cute guy waiting in line for his number.  It being embarrassing your poor best friend who’s got her face hidden behind your shoulder, soft blonde bangs brushing your cheek as she shakes her head in a poor attempt to deter you. 

“Don’t make it weird,”  she whispers into the collar of your coat, denim rough against your neck. 

“You’re the one making it weird!”  The hiss is quiet, gentle.  More coaxing than reprimand or displeasure.  This is a usual occurrence for the two of you. 

Whereas you were relentless, unrepentant - rays of sunlight on the hottest day of summer - she was the softest breeze, barely a ruffle of leaves.  You complemented and completed each other and had for the better part of your lives.  Exactly why you’d opted to take this trip with her and only her;  she was the one person who didn’t drive you absolutely insane after a certain number of days together.  She filled all the empty spaces of your puzzle, rather than smothered you with her own shape. 

Still, you sometimes had disagreements.  Now was one of those times. 

“What if he doesn’t speak English?”  

She’s being far too realistic, of course, in her patented Ivy way.  You have to admit - she has a point.  The likelihood of this random stranger even understanding you is slim but you figure it doesn’t hurt to ask.  When in Rome Okinawa, right? 

“Then I’ll use Google translate,”  you retort around a mouthful of laughter, the sound buzzing around your teeth.  You’d think they’d stung her by how Ivy recoils, grimacing at you in the same instance you advance a step.  “Wish me luck!”

She doesn’t.  You don’t care.  

A hand reaches out, two fingers poised. 

And then he - the cute fellow customer with jet black hair and expensive sneakers on - faces you, but not because you’ve spoken.  He turns because his companion has caught his attention, jerking his platinum blond head toward you.  At least, you think it’s blond.  You really can’t tell with how his bucket hat is pulled so low over his ears, the bottom half of his face obscured by a plain black mask. 

The words die on your tongue, suddenly stolen by the sheer beauty of cute guy’s face.  He’s disarmingly handsome, with high cheekbones and a perfectly upturned nose.  His mouth splits - heart-shaped around bright white teeth - and you can’t help the little tumble your heart takes when he smiles.  It brushes itself off before falling all over again, nearly launching itself out of your chest and at his feet. 

“Hi?”  There’s something lyrical about his voice, like summertime and riding in the car with the windows down.  It’s also accented - peculiar in a way that’s strangely familiar.  You can’t quite place it. 

“Hi!”  You all but chirp, probably with the dumbest look on your face.  You hope your smile offsets it.  “Could I have your number?” 

Sunshine - because that’s his nickname for now and it feels terribly fitting - blinks at you, head tilting in a way you can only describe as adorable. 

“My number?”�� It’s an echo, in less of a what the fuck way and more of a did-I-hear-you-right way. 

You nod once, twice, a hopeful laugh rolling off your tongue.  It slots into the spaces between you and settles, strangely nervous.  You’re not used to the anxiety that’s thrumming through your veins and causing a ruckus in your ears. 

There’s just something about him. 

“Yeah, your number?”  As if to illustrate your point better, you raise your phone and wave it about, tapping against the back of your fluorescent pink case.  “To text you?”

Realisation dawns, passing in pretty rays over his face.  “Oh!”  For a moment, he seems ready to give it, every inch of his expression wide open. 

Then, all at once, it falls - blinds dropping across a window.  He seems deep in thought, his gaze jumping to the blond that’s now made himself comfortable at a table a few feet away, back hunched and attention focused solely on the screen of his Samsung.  Your stare follows, traipsing the narrow ridge of the other’s shoulders before swivelling back to the ball of light before you.  

God, you can’t get over how good looking he is.  It’s almost hard to look at him, yet somehow harder to look away. 

“You want… my number?”  

“If that’s okay,”  you murmur, with your most disarming smile.  You know it’s a solid effort - you’ve won parents and bosses over with it.  Three years of braces had done you good.

He’s seemingly stuck, torn between giving into the strange girl in front of him and something else you have no idea about.  You can practically feel Ivy burning a hole into the back of your skull with each moment that passes.  She’s definitely going to hold this against you for at least an hour. 

“I can have yours?”  A sleek iPhone - no case, to your horror - is fished out of his pocket and offered to you.  You can’t help but admire his hands, the way his knuckles wrap around the slim device.  “I’ll take your, um, number?” 

It’s not what you’d expected.  Truthfully, a part of you wonders whether this means he’ll take it and never use it.  You hope not.  

“Sure,” you agree readily, nodding with a delight that feels a little much for a chance meeting in a random mochi donut shop.  You try not to dwell on it as you enter your contact details, passing the phone back over with two hands. “Don’t forget to use it!”  It’s meant to be flirtatious, friendly without being too forward.  You’re unsure if it’s lost on him.  You think it might be by how he beams at you, offering nothing in return. 

“Gaja.”  

The interruption breaks the stillness between you, spoken so quietly you almost miss it.  It comes low and swift from the blond that’s joined Sunshine’s side, stealing his attention from you.  You try to hide your disappointment, though it’s quickly replaced by wide-eyed wonder. 

You don’t mean to stare - you probably look like a fish out of water - but realisation brings with it unflattering expressions.  It’s a simple fact of life.  

“Kamsahamnida.”  Your Korean is rusty - clearly without practice and uncomfortable on your tongue. For not the first time, you wish you’d been more receptive to your parents’ insistence that you learn.  

Surprise flips across Sunshine’s face, thrusting his eyebrows to disappear behind his fringe.  Then he grins, so big and unreserved that it really is blinding - like staring directly into the sky on a day without clouds.  He looks on the edge of speaking - as if all the words are balanced right behind his teeth, ready to spill out with the same abandon as his joy - before Blondie repeats himself, this time with more urgency.

You’re holding them up.  Oh god. 

With a swiftness usually reserved for the volleyball court, you sidestep, nearly knocking a lurking best friend over in your haste.  Your head is bowed - a decidedly strange gesture for you - and you glance up through a curtain of swept bangs and thick lashes.  “Mianhaeyo.”  You want to say more but you’re fumbling, trying to find the words you’ve never taken the time to properly study.  “I… um...”  

There’s a hand in yours, squeezing in reassurance. Or maybe frustration.  It isn’t always easy to tell with Ivy.

“It was nice to meet you” is what you settle on. 

“You too,”  Sunshine returns, far too kindly, with that same brilliant smile that has your jaw aching with the intensity of your own.  He’s all but ushered out the door, though he turns at the last minute to wave - a sweet thing that makes you laugh.  “I will call!”

Waiting isn’t something you do well.  As evidenced by your go-getter attitude, your patience tends to run thin.  You want things and you want them now - but it seems that isn’t in your cards.  Shit hand, you think.

So you sit and you wait and well, you’re not really sitting and waiting.  You’re still living your life and enjoying your vacation.  You’ve been to the beach - there’s a neat underground tower Ivy had dragged you to that had you gaping at the fish swimming by at eye level - and you’ve had probably too much taco rice than is strictly speaking necessary.

But you haven’t been able to get him out of your head and it’s driving you more than a little crazy on the third day that you haven’t heard from him.

“Are you listening to me?”  It’s Ivy, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed with two intricately woven bracelets held aloft.  They’re both pretty and hardly discernible in their differences.  One’s blue and the other is… a slightly darker shade of blue?

“Huh?”  Your thoughts are a million miles away, focused solely on the memory of a certain Sunshine boy.  

“Which one!”  She’s exasperated, flailing her wrists just enough that one trinket whacks you right between the eyes.  Okay, so you deserved that.

You’re rubbing at the red mark, turning away in the same instant you speak.  “That one.”  

“That one?” 

“The one on the right!”

She grumbles something that sounds awfully like I hate you but you’re too busy checking your phone to really call her on it.  No new messages, save for the three group chats you’re in that absolutely refuse to shut up.  You don’t count those.

“A watched pot never boils,”  she hums from somewhere behind you, before lapsing into stilted Japanese with the kindly old woman behind the counter. 

You know she’s right but that doesn’t change a thing.  You check your phone twelve more times between exiting the small jewellery shop and stepping into the karaoke bar.  It’s not really that often, you tell yourself.  Most millennials sit on their phones for hours!  You’re a step above, truly.

Until Airi’s husband is grilling you, poking fun at the fact that you can’t seem to tear yourself away from the device in your hands.

“Don’t forget you’re out,”  he teases around the rim of his beer, arm slung comfortably across his wife’s shoulders.  “Live in the moment, y’know?”  

If you weren’t so close - if they weren’t hosting you at their apartment for this leg of your trip - you’d probably ignore him.  As it stands, he’s like an annoying older brother and receives a swift kick to his shin.  You grin just as he grimaces, nearly spilling his glass of Sapporo all over his front.

“Hey— you brat!”

“Takes one to know one,”  you retort, tongue out and mischief wrapped into every syllable.  “Don’t know how you’re married.  Didn’t think kids were allowed to.”  

Across from you, Airi stifles a snicker and the rest of your group breaks into laughter.  You’re in the middle of throwing middle fingers at Sunny when a hand clasps your forearm with an aggression you can’t ignore. 

Ivy’s staring at you with eyes the size of saucers, mouth curled into a perfectly shaped ‘O’.  A part of you wants to shove a limp fry into it - until you follow the line of her arm, the length of her finger. 

Because on the screen - serenading your ragtag group of friends in the terrible voice of Airi’s little brother - is cute-guy-from-donuts.  Sunshine. 

What the hell?

tag list.  @neverthefirstchoice​​​​ @youwannabelostandnotbefound​​​​

#thebtswritersclub #ficswithluv #heartsforbts #magicshopnet #networkbangtan #cypherwritersnet #bts #bts au #bts fic #bts drabble #bts jhope #bts hoseok #jhope #jung hoseok #jhope au #jhope imagine #jhope fic #jhope drabble #hoseok au #hoseok fic #hoseok drabble #jhope x you #jhope x reader #jhope x oc #hoseok x oc #hoseok x you #hoseok x reader #work.zip #drabble.zip #jhope.doc

[w-ngs]

jan21

hello 2021! you did not get off on a good start. let’s try and be a little better, okay?

i didn’t read much this month (and probably won’t be for a long while because of school), but it was a wild month. well, you’ll see.

***

crooked kingdom, leigh bardugo — oh my god???? i completely forgot that i read this before i left for school and almost didn’t include it in my monthly wrap-up????? how dare i forget this masterpiece.

it was great. i loved it. i think overall, i preferred 6oc because heist stories are my guilty pleasure. but romance-wise... let’s just say kaz and inej have made it to my top 10 ships. but also i read through this so fast because i had to finish it before i left that half the story is kinda just not in my brain lololol

the most intriguing part of the entire story was the anti-wraith. her character kind of came out of nowhere, and i’m not really sure she had much of a purpose than being someone who could physically match inej. i guess she was also anti in the sense that she had no respect, just ruthlessness, which is the opposite of inej and what she stands for. but i don’t know if the anti-wraith was significant enough of a character to really be considered a foil.

i don’t really give spoiler warnings because hardly anyone reads these other than myself lolol but big spoiler ahead. skip the next paragraph if you don’t want to know. cuz i accidentally spoiled it for myself before reading and i kinda ruined it for myself lmfao.

poor matthias. he was there, and then he was gone. i feel terrible for nina. they were finally on the same page, and then he had to act all saint-like and trigger some idiot into killing him. and matthias finally came to terms with what he’d been taught and what he was trying to teach himself (#charactergrowth), so he wrapped things up neatly for himself before the bye-bye. but nina, she finally got her guy on her side and they were supposed to change the world together. sigh.

and of course, we got kaz. he’s my favorite. how could he not be, with his trauma and desire to overcome it but not letting it define him and still maintaining that evil genius act he’s so good at. it definitely hit harder in this story, the extent of his trauma. it made him more real, too. both sides of him coexist, and one could not exist without the other. he’s crazy, in nearly all senses of the word. also crazy in love, the mfing idiot. ugh, i love vulnerable kaz. i love what inej brings out in him, how she knows just how hard to push without driving him over the edge. also i saw a tiktok (this app is gonna come up a lot more in the next few reviews fsjdsdfkjdf) with a photo of them kissing with a towel between their mouths because he can’t touch her but he desperately wants to and what a perfect solution is that their... bathroom scene had me holding my breath. or at least taking very shallow breaths. it was intense. so intimate, i felt like i shouldn’t even have been there. ugh, the cute little babies. uwuwuwuwuwu

one last note. leigh bardugo is a very good writer, plot and characters and all. everything flowed much more smoothly in this book, and once again i was impressed by the detail provided. you go girl. i can’t wait to see the tv series development.

a 10/10.

***

the shadows between us, tricia levenseller — literally what did i read lmaooo. this is my first tiktok book recommendation. and it. was. boring. boring characters that didn’t make much sense. boring plot. i skimmed it after the first 50 pages cause it was so boring. that’s it bye.

a 3/10.

***

manacled, senlinyu — um. wow. i literally......... even hours after finishing it my brain is still ridiculously scrambled. edit: it’s about a month later and sometimes random scenes and images still pop in my head for no reason and then i feel all twisted inside again. i love it.

so, this is not a published book but a dramione fanfiction on ao3. i don’t read fanfics that often anymore, mainly because i’d rather read other things, not because i don’t like them. but i found this one because a tiktok that showed the illustrations in the story and i was so blown away by the fact someone would illustrate an entire fanfic that i just had to read it. and i have no regrets. it’s kinda long and a biiit wordy for me at times but holy shit that hit like a mother trucker. and i haven’t read dramione in ages, not since... years. so this really hit different.

the illustrations are beautiful. they’re what dragged me into the story in the first place, so, of course they are. but i’d literally spend minutes looking at every detail in amazement at how perfectly the emotions were captured and the lighting casting the perfect shadows and just… everything. i know nothing about drawing but my eyes were truly blessed.

i think integrating the handmaid’s tale with the hp world was ingenious. i would never have expected that. and wow. the relationship between the two, it’s…….. i can barely put it in words in my mind, and it’s even harder to articulate on paper. complex, but at the same time not, simply the desire for the other to stay alive. timeless. destructive. their only defense from the harsh reality of their situation. desperation at its most desperate, their one and only survival method. depressing. it’s so depressing. i was so sad, the angst almost too much at times.

the flashbacks were insanely intense. and i thought the handmaid section was bad. it was awful to read. i could hardly bear it, it was so dark at times i didn’t know how either of them got through it all. i mean, they barely did. the near-death scares, the constant need to create a blank slate within yourself in order to not overwhelm yourself with crushing emotions… wartime sometimes has a tendency to sound romantic, but theirs wasn’t anything near romantic, and i appreciate that the author chose to be very real about it.

at the beginning, and in the middle when we went through the flashbacks, i was afraid the love would be toxic. and, well, it kind of was at some points. but in a time like that and a situation like theirs, it would be hard to not have a toxic relationship. i was glad that in the end theirs was a good love, the kind that sustained and kept them alive and got them through until the very end, because it was what they needed from each other. and, of course, my favorite part of it all was draco’s ceaseless possessiveness that only seemed to grow, never fade. i love simpy men.

they deserve each other. i was afraid at the end they wouldn’t, that one of them would die—that draco would die because hermione basically did once already for him, so he would have to “return the favor”—also she was pregnant so there was no way she’d be the one to die—idk many theories. but at the end i’m so glad they both ended up alive. after everything, they deserved it.

i did nothing for two days straight but read this book. except eat. and barely sleep. and i have no regrets.

a 9/10.

***

bloodlines, richelle mead — dang. i used to be obsessed with vampire academy when i was in middle school. i even watched the terrible movie that released because of it. and now i can’t believe i really thought that was peak literature lmfaooooo

i remember adrian being such a funny and interesting character that i picked up bloodlines to see if it was gonna be as good as i remembered it was. i was disappointed. it was just... well let’s just say there wasn’t enough to get me invested in the characters as i used to be. i think what it was is that adrian’s characterization was so weak. he wasn’t as ~quirky~ as i remembered him to be haha. the plot was also way too slow-paced, and a little too easy to guess. maybe if i was 12 again i’d be going crazy over it like i used to. but i’m not a pre-teen anymore and my brain craves stuff along the lines of manacled—destruction, death, angst that wants me to pull my own heart out to stop it from hurting.

a 5/10.

#the shadows between us #tricia levenseller #manacled #senlinyu #bloodlines #richelle mead #booktok #books #reading #book blog #dramione #fanfiction #ao3 #enemies to lovers #ya #teen fiction #bookish #what i'd give to read manacled all over again #it was the best at being the worst for my heart #vampires #dramione is top tier and you cannot change my mind #leigh bardugo #crooked kingdom

[theorangestar]

Okay, Skyward Sword first impressions!

My first session was long, and there are spoilers for those who never played it before, so my thoughts are below.

- I like the ink blot opening sequence, but I’m a sucker for backstory and lore being told through illustrations and a different style than the main story.

- But why did the Goddess send all the humans to live up in the sky, but not any of the other surface peoples? Are humans just so weak that getting them out of the way is best for everyone? What about the others? I saw a Goron in that ink blot, are you telling me Gorons aren’t worthy of being saved and have to fight? Fuck you, Gorons are great.

- Also, it said humans were sent to Skyloft. Are... are we the humans? What’s the difference between Hylians and humans?

- Okay, the internet told me about Ghirahim and Demise, but who was going to tell me about the spiky doom monster?!

- The colors are very pretty. Skyloft looks great. The water reminds me of the Spyro games.

- Wow, Zelda’s bird is rude.

- Link’s got wood carving tools on his desk and I love me an artistic boi. He made all those figures in his room!

- Pipit is a little intense with severe eyebrows, but I like him. Karane is less intense, and I like her pigtails. I think she crocheted all the bird plushies in her room. I also think she has a crush on Pipit. Little evidence at this point, but that’s my theory.

- Also, if that’s the school uniform, does that mean boys get the long caps and girls get a beret? Karane doesn’t have a long cap like Pipit does. Why the different caps for different genders?

- Also Pipit doesn’t have his own room at the academy. Why doesn’t he have a room?!

- We were a year too late to have a yellow-clad hero. Bananas.

- Who made Fledge try to move these barrels by himself? Rude! At least give him a cart or something. I will help him. This poor guy!! I want to give him a hug, he seems so down on himself.

- Owlan and Horwell make me think of LOTR elves.

- PARKOUR!

- But seriously, I can see how these climbing features led to Breath of the Wild. Sky can parkour, but Wild just clings onto any surface like a spider and just goes.

- Remlits are Pokemon. And I love that Link just picks it up and just keeps smiling at it. Remlits are so cute!

- Zelda is so excited to see Link, this is such a turn from BOTW. She’s so sweet!

- Gaepora is literally an owl man. He is an owl. I don’t think his eyes can go any wider.

- Also, how come the Zeldas never look like their fathers? Zelda doesn’t look anything like an owl! And don’t get me started on Rhoam.

- Honestly, if I was Zelda, I’d be a little pissed if my dad kept saying how amazing my best friend friend is and pointing out how jealous I am but saying it’s natural because my friend’s bond with his bird is JUST. SO. AMAZING.

- SHE PUSHED ME!! D:<

- Wow, Link’s voice is deeper than I expected.

- Okay, someone stole my birb and I have to find it.

- Does no one name their Loftwings? Everyone just refers to them as “my bird”, “your bird.” If they’re supposed to be our soulmates or something, shouldn’t they have names? The remlit gets a name but not the Loftwing?

- ... Fledge, what do you know?

- These character designs are really weird. Obviously, Link and Zelda are made to be the most attractive characters, but the rest is a weird range of, slightly exaggerated but pretty normal to WTF.

- I don’t like Groose’s mouth. It makes weird shapes.

- Okay, he says I’m bragging about my friendship with Zelda, but so far it seems just her dad brags about it. I haven’t said anything. Sorry dude that I have her dad’s approval. Can’t beat that.

- Stop making that face at Zelda, it’s creepy!!

- FLEDGE!!! My goddess...  I may forgive you in time, but right now I’m mad. A heads up would have been nice! And after I helped with that barrel!

- I has sword.

- Okay, I do have a bit of trouble with the motion controls for the sword. Maybe I’ll get better with practice, but the precision I need for some of these cuts may be a problem down the line.

- Okay, does Link have premonition powers or something? First the dream with the monster, then he gets a vision at the blocked cave of his bird, even though he can’t hear or see it from this vantage point, and then later the dream with Fi. Is Link an oracle?

- ... It took me an embarrassing amount of time to realize that I needed to cut the gate with the sword. I’m dumb.

- MY BIRB!! :D I’m calling him Red. Or maybe Big Red.

- FLYING IS HARD OMG. I just keep going in circles over and over and over. This is going to be really difficult, and I had to recalibrate my joy cons a couple times midair.

- Okay, so Link and Zelda are the only ones around for the ceremony. Why is no one around to watch? How do they know we did it? We could’ve just skipped it and no one would have known.

- SHE PUSHED ME AGAIN!! D:<

- Aiming is hard when you’re falling. :’(

- Oh, this is a date. She wants to go on a date. Well okay, but only if she stops pushing me off stuff.

- HOW DID WE NOT NOTICE THE TORNADO?!

- Well shit.

- Also I fell again, but this time Zelda didn’t push me.

- Gaepora is really taking this well. I mean, he’s clearly concerned, but for someone whose daughter just potentially fell to her death, he’s really understanding about it.

- Fi ghost just had to lead me around the longest way possible, didn’t she.

- Also how do you pronounce her name? I’ve heard people pronounce it “Fye,” like “my”, but I keep wanting to say “Fee,” like “Do Re Mi.”

- I take back what I said about remlits.

- Motion controls once again my downfall. I’m trying to point the sword up, but Link will not follow me until my arm is completely arched over my head instead of straight up. I imagine from Fi and Gaepora’s point of view Link is just waving the sword around like a complete idiot.

- Between the sword fighting, the charging of the Goddess Sword, and all the flying, my arms are already sore. I better be ripped by the time this game is over.

- Okay, there was no chance to save any time from when I went to rescue Big Red to when I put on the green uniform. And Fi’s journey blocked all the save statues. I needed another save point in there.

- Fledge gave me a pouch, how sweet! Oh, he’s still talking down about himself. Okay, fine, I forgive him. My two goals for this game are to save Zelda and to find Fledge some self esteem.

Okay, that was my first session with Skyward Sword. I’m liking the story, but some of the controls are frustrating. I’m hoping it’s just a learning curve and I’ll get better as I go on. I know the Wii version had complaints about the controls, but I’m hoping some of it was fixed for the Switch.

Also Link is so cute!! I have to say, Link being so expressive is such a nice change from BOTW where he only makes expressions in certain situations, like when he’s taking a selfie, but he never makes any kind of expression when he’s talking to someone. It’s hard to read his character that way. But SKSW Link I feel I understand him more, and he has such a pretty smile. No wonder Zelda fell for him. XD

#skyward sword playthrough #sshd loz #thoughts and first impressions #skyward sword spoilers

[ahiddenpath]

My Tarot Decks

Hey babes!  I wanted to share my tarot decks and tell you a bit about them.  Maybe one might be right for you!

The decks are listed in the order I received them.  Please click the links to look at the deck art!  These decks are all a feast for the eyes.

Shadowscapes Tarot

This is my first deck, I can’t recall when I purchased it- it was a long time ago!  At the time, it was on a ton of “top 10 recommended decks” lists, and I already knew and loved Stephanie Pui-Mun Law’s faerie watercolor art.

Law’s art is detailed and decadent, and while the cards are gorgeous...  I find they get in the way of themselves.  Ideally, tarot cards should guide our subconsciousness and spark our intuition...  But instead, I find myself squinting at an image featuring ten foxes, a large humanoid figure, and a few smaller fey critters, barely able to make everything out on the tiny tarot card.

I couldn’t use the deck at all, and I thought my third eye must be permanently napping xD  Sadly, I didn’t touch tarot for years after this.

The art is gorgeous though, definitely take a look at the images.  The deck itself is pretty standard in quality, nothing to compliment, but nothing to complain about (except that the pictures are too detailed for the card size).

The Fountain Tarot

Years and years later, I bumped into the Fountain Tarot and instantly fell in love.  The deck utilizes geometry and cool colors, which made it feel more approachable for my scientist, apparently third eye challenged self.  

This is one of the most high quality decks I own.  The cards have silvered edges, and they feel thick and move like water in my hands.  Apparently, many Seekers feel that the deck is “cold,” which means they can’t connect with it or tap into their instincts while using it.  I agree that it feels more “physical” and “conscious minded” than most of my decks, but as a new Seeker who didn’t really “get” the whole “access your subconscious through Archetypes and instinct” thing, this deck gave me the confidence to try tarot again.  

I can see where an experienced practitioner might pass it by, but if you’re a person who is unsure of their ability to tap into their intuition for whatever reason, give this one a try!  

The downsides to this deck are that it doesn’t have enough diversity in the human figures, and that some folks find it “cold.”  The upside is that the quality is stunning, it may feel more welcoming to “logic-heavy” types, and the art is gorgeous.  This deck was hella expensive when I bought it, but you can pick it up for $25 now, which is mind blowing for what you get!  

Considerate Cat Tarot

This deck features a plethora of actual rescue cats, and a portion of the proceeds goes to shelters.  That was all I needed to know to buy a deck.  Oops, I bought it, how did that happen!

The deck is unusable for me, though.  The cats are adorable, but there’s nothing in the art to guide me towards the meaning the card represents.  It’s just a bunch of cute, sweet babies.  The art and the box design are just adorable, but the deck quality itself is miserable.  The cards are thin, and every single one came scratched and dinged.  This was not a cheap deck, so the poor quality was a huge hit :/  I just can’t recommend it, make a direct donation to shelters instead, my friends.

The Wild Unknown Tarot

A huge swath of Seekers swear by The Wild Unknown, and with good reason.  It utilizes images of nature with lots of black and pops of rainbow technicolor.  The images are comparatively simple, but never boring.  Most users report that it’s a “warm” deck that easily guides Seekers to their intuition.

At $30, it’s a high quality deck for the money.  It also comes with a phenomenal guidebook that will really help new Seekers!  The packaging is lovely, and the cards are thick and feel good in your hands.

Tarot of the Divine

This deck is so wonderful- and it’s the only deck I’ve cried over xD  When I opened the box and saw The Little Mermaid as The Fool, I teared up.  When I saw my favorite tarot card, Strength, depicting Janet and Tam Lin...  Yeah, tears were shed.

But let me back up!  Each card in this deck features a fairy tale/folk tale.  It’s a stunningly diverse deck that taps into the collective unconscious by utilizing folk narratives, the kind that pop up around the globe in various similar forms.  I’ve heard people say that the stories get in the way of readings for them, but I find that the opposite is true.

It comes in a stunning box, it includes a nice guide book, and the cards are good quality with gorgeous art.  At $20, you truly cannot beat the quality per dollar.  Plus, you’ll learn a bunch of new stories from all over the world!

The Lubanko Tarot

I was fortunate to pick this deck up from its kickstarter- I’m not sure when they’ll be available for general sale.  It’s a truly stunning deck!  The creator describes it as such: “The Lubanko Tarot is a richly-illustrated tarot deck of 78 original paintings that traverse the mental landscape of the strange, the subconscious, the queer, the divine, and the intense.”  If you’re not sure what that means, you’ll get it when you hold the deck.  The art rises like neon lights from black cards.  It’s diverse, queer, and bursting with energy.  Reading with it is like sinking your teeth into a neon fruit that drips glowing juices.  I’ve never seen another deck quite like it.

It’s a higher end deck in terms of price, but it came with a guide book, extremely high quality cards with my favorite silvered edges, a gorgeous box, and an altar cloth for readings.  It’s stunning and unique and primal.  I tend to feel quiet and receptive when I read tarot, so it feels a bit loud and intense for me.  Still, I adore it, and I know there will be days when it’s the deck I need.

God this is a stunner.  Please feast your eyes and senses on the art (oh, it’s not all work safe, though).

The Spacious Tarot

A brand new deck (to me, I mean) that arrived yesterday!  And it’s another truly special one.

It’s... kind of the opposite of The Lubanko Tarot.  It’s a quiet deck with a watercolor vibe featuring nature.  In that way, it’s like The Wild Unknown, but it utilizes calm colors instead of the rainbow-on-black intensity.  

What makes this deck so great, I think, is that it’s a collaboration between an artist and a professional tarot practitioner.  The cards are supremely well thought out, and they tell a narrative, which the tarot is meant to do (depicting The Fool’s journey through the rest of the cards).  The structure of the art depicts the inherent structure of the tarot.

This deck truly feels peaceful, like meditation.  I haven’t spent enough time with it to say more, but I’m stoked about exploring it.  The guidebook is tiny, but it does so much with so little, which is ideal for learning.  

The deck comes with a guidebook, a box, and the deck.  The cards are good quality with gorgeous colors.  They aren’t as fancy as The Fountain Tarot or The Lubanko Tarot- not as thick, and not lined with silver.  At $49, it’s not the jaw-dropping value of The Tarot of the Divine, but the beautiful art and the unbelievable thoughtfulness of the deck can’t be overlooked.

Those are my decks!  If anyone would be interested in a video flip through of them, please let me know.  I’d love to tell you my story about Janet and Tam Lin as the Strength card in the Tarot of the Divine!

#tarot #my tarot decks #tarot decks

[yoongiloveshobi]

hobi after a hardworking day - sope fluffy ramble

Notes :]

So, today was a very long and rainy day for me. This is just some of the pretty SOPE scenarios i make in my head for mental health and comfort. I hope the feeling gets across even with my poor writing habilities lol c: 

After a long day of work, Hoseok came back home where he shared a dorm with his fellow band members. He came inside the entrance talking through the phone with Jimin, wishing him a nice trip to visit his loved one. The rest of the members were also taking advantage of a couple free days they had to visit families and lovers, which they rarely had time to do. This time, Hoseok wanted to use these days to relax at the dorm by himself and try to write some rhymes he has been thinking about. Even after a hardworking day at the studio and dance practice, he wanted to put up some work for his own mixtape in the free days ahead.

Since he had been going the whole day between the studio and dance practice, his body was covered in dried sweat which was then added with fresh sweat, it was a cycle. As neat as Hoseok is, he wanted to shower firstly, so he turned on the cold water and washed his day off his skin, away with his tired self, he was now very excited and fresh, ready to just enjoy sometime to himself before going to bed, so he threw a towel to his waist and started to fill up the bathtub, this time with steaming hot water. Went on Netflix in his laptop at his bedroom, starting to look for a good romantic k-drama to enjoy in the tub when it was ready.

The door entrance sounded open and Hoseok recognized the footsteps in the living room, though he didn’t understand why Yoongi was still in Seoul if he could visit his family for a few days.

“Hi hyung!! how come you haven’t left yet?” said the redhaired boy, still in a towel, holding his laptop on hand.

“Well, maybe I just go tomorrow, I’m too tired to go tonight” said Yoongi yawning, taking out a few things from his bag and not even really noticing his roommate was only wearing a towel, maybe he was used to it already.

After remembering he had left the water pouring, Hoseok hurried to shut it before the tub overflowed and came back to the living room for his laptop, where he found Yoongi had still not gone to bed.

“Hey, I knew you were gonna be here… and I saw this in the store and thought you’d like it? Idk it reminded me of you for some reason” said Yoongi handing a small box to his friend without making eye contact. The box read WINTER MINTCHOCO LOVERS! Pour steamy milk and mix! And a very cute illustration of a mint and a chocolate cuddling with winter clothes.

Hoseok was so moved by the detail he was embarrassed for not even knowing Yoongi was gonna be there too, he didn’t have anything for him. So, he not only thanked with the widest smile to his hyung, but insisted on him to have a cup of minty hot chocolate with him, to what he ended up accepting.

“I was going to watch a drama on the bathtub, just to distract myself a little, I’m satisfied with everything I got done today, so now I just need to relax” explained the youngest sipping a bit of his chocolate.

“Hobi, you always work very hard, you deserve that distraction, and this mintchoco… I know you love that ice cream, but since it’s winter I thought-” started Yoongi before being interrupted with a finger to his mouth.

“Hey I love it! You really are sweet, Min Suga..” said Hobi smiling and making his eyes disappear into crescent moons.  “Plus, you actually should get some relax and chill time, you never stop working” he finished without realizing how the invitation sounded.

The thought of both of them in a bathtub made Yoongi blush bright red like crazy, which made Hoseok realize the situation and made himself laugh, without expecting the next answer.

“Okay then! I’ll go for the lavender and honey bathbomb I bought about a year ago!” hurried Yoongi already taking his jacket off and waddling to his bedroom. Leaving nervous and blushed Hoseok standing in a towel with his two hot mintchoco’s and a romantic drama about to play.

#sope #yoonseok #jung hoseok #jhope #min yoongi #SUGA #bts #bts fanfic #sope fanfic #sope fic #sobi #mint hot choco #winter lovers #im just rambling by now #the one where hobi invites yoongi to bath together by accident #yoongi is the best boyfriend not boyfriend #oh btw this is kinda cannon inspired

[dannyphannypack]

Crossover Fic Recs

Hey, saw your post for some fic recs! Unfortunately I can't continue the wonderful thread of reblogs because I wish to remain anonymous, but here have some cool crossovers that I didn't see get rec'd yet :D (you can either post this or add it to the reblogs, I don't mind either way)

Just Another Meteor Freak [500k words, complete] (and it's sequel, which is unfortunately incomplete) is a Smallville/DP crossover that's absolutely a fantastic read and I cannot recommend it enough, it's one of my faves! Brief synopsis: Danny goes to live with his aunt Martha Kent after his family dies (and for once Danny's family dying in a crossover fic doesn't have anything to do with TUE!), and misunderstandings of the good kind and mishaps ensue because of course Danny and Clark's hero complexes come into play. It's got hurt/comfort, fluff, angst, sibling-esque-bonding, and all sorts of cool stuff, including ghost king headcannons and new powers for Danny. It takes place mostly from a Smallville perspective, but Danny's woven in so seamlessly that you won't believe he wasn't in the original show to begin with. I read it for the first time after having not watched Smallville in years and I could still understand it though, so I think that if you haven't watched Smallville before you could still enjoy the fic a lot!

And like, honestly, I totally recommend other stuff by this author (jadedbluerose) too. She's got a Merlin/DP crossover that's pretty fantastic, but unfortunately she hasn't updated anything since 2014 :( still worth the read though!!

Spirited Away [70k, complete] is a Harry Potter/DP crossover, it's honestly THE MOST hilarious fic I've ever read. Synopsis: Danny is an unwilling student at Hogwarts, and the most chaotic Hufflepuff the world has ever seen. He claims he's been kidnapped but when no one listens to him, he raises all kinds of hell to try and get kicked out. And if that doesn't work, well, he can always sue them. 100% worth the read, it will definitely make you laugh.

Various Superphantom (Supernatural/DP) crossovers by sapphireswimming. Literally anything Superphantom found here? Totally the best. You can also check out Superphantom fics by surelysilly (whose fics are more on the darker end of the spectrum, and their prose style is kinda abstract rather than your traditional linear narrative) Vitaliciouscreations (they've got a oneshot collection that's pretty fun, as well as a oneshot that I wish they'd continue and a complete cute 13k-word penpal fic.)

How to befriend a ghost [80k, incomplete] is a HTTYD/DP crossover in which Danny gets stuck in the Viking era, and I originally started reading this for the Danny & Hiccup friendship because it's adorable and both of them see how similar they are to each other and find kinship in that. The dragon Danny gets (because this is a HTTYD crossover, this is inevitable!) really sneaks into your heart though, and I ABSOLUTELY adore Sparky as much as I adore Toothless. He's very lovable and complements Danny super well! Of course, it's not all friendship bonding and training dragons, the archipelago is Danny's home now (until he can find his way back to Amity Park/his own century) and he's going to protect it too when trouble arises, just like the dragons do. He even gets new powers along the way. This fic is pretty fun, there's a lot of switching perspectives and you really see the characters' voices come through in it, and you even get to see the dragons' POV, which is really interesting since you get to learn Sparky's backstory!

Den Mother [8k, ongoing] is a Young Justice/DP crossover that acknowledges the fact that Danny is by all rights a first-generation hero, and he's treated with the respect as such and gets to join the Justice League rather than the YJ team. Of course, he doesn't WANT to join the league at first, which is a different take than you'd expect, but he reluctantly agrees and is then given the same responsibilities as a Justice League member--that is, to teach the YJ something about teamwork or whatever. It's not very long right now, but the premise is so good! It has a lot of potential.

A Foreign Perspective [200k words, complete] is a DNAngel/DP crossover that I saw @scrollingdown call a fandom classic once and honestly agree, even though I don't think many people know/have read it. It's a cute friendship fic that focuses on Phantom (not Danny, but Phantom specifically) making his first friend, an older boy named Daisuke, who seems normal at first, but is slowly revealed to be a little more understanding of Danny's situation than he appears. Some comfort involved too since Danny deals with a little more with the idea of mourning/loss than in canon, seeing as Daisuke thinks he's a full ghost and therefore a teenager that died, and Danny learns to be a different kind of hero because of it. Really cool fic too since you don't need to know DNAngel at all to understand the fic, since it's told from DP's perspective, and you get to learn about Daisuke as Danny does. It's just super sweet and it's got some action here and there that makes it exciting, and it's really a fun read.

Other stuff by this author is worth the read too! They've got oneshots of a HP crossover and Ghost Whisperer crossover, and a sadly incomplete HTTYD crossover [100k words] that is still super super good and also deals with ideas about mourning and loss. Their non-crossover stuff is also pretty interesting (there's a Mute!Danny AU and Dash kinda-redemption oneshot I really liked).

Diversity [150k, ongoing] is another Ghost Whisperer/DP crossover, it's a found-family fic where Danny runs away from home after his family dies in the events post TUE. He ends up running into Melinda and she goes out of her way to help him. There's a couple underlying mysteries surrounding the ghosts that haunt this fic, and Melinda tries to understand Danny's past and ends up tangled in a conspiracy because Danny's hiding his ghostly alter-ego and also the GIW are involved at some point (and they are much more menacing here than in canon). It's totally a page-turner, and you can get as invested as Melinda in hoping Danny heals from his loss. Spellbound [150k, ongoing] is a HP/DP crossover by the same author! Danny accidentally gets trapped by Magical Britain and is bitter about it, but he's trying to make the best of it. The Wizards have no idea what to make of him, but he just wants to go home, and he makes a couple friends while he plots his escape. (It's actually been a while since I read that one, so I'm a bit fuzzy on the details, but I do remember feeling bad for Danny in this fic, poor boy's lonely and can't even interact with kids his own age because he's an unknown creature to the wizards. Good thing Danny's never been one to follow authority.)

A Visit to Paris [10k, complete] is a Miraculous Ladybug/DP crossover in which Danny is Akumatized... sort of. The results are hilarious: Danny's a troll, Hawkmoth is frustrated, the heroes aren't really sure what to make of it, and Danny and Adrien make a lot of puns. Oh, and Danny is the only one smart enough to fix Paris' villain problem (okay, so it might be slightly cracky). It reminds me very much of Spirited Away, which I mentioned earlier. It's got the same level of chaos that's for sure. All in all, it's a very, very fun read.

A Different Sort of House Call [50k, incomplete] is a House MD/DP crossover, it's been years since I read it but I've always considered it one of the fandom classics too? It was definitely one of the first things to pop to mind when I was trying to recall all the cool memorable crossovers to rec you, so this goes on the list too. It's Danny at the hospital with House, and the doctors are trying to diagnose him without knowing about his ghost half (and Danny's not exactly willing to tell them either). There's angst (especially since the author wrote this to follow Lab Rat by AnneriaWings), Vlad trying to be an ally (sorta?), and House being clever as usual. Sadly it's incomplete but it's still super good!!

Running Blind [20k, complete] is a CSI/DP crossover (it took me forever to find the link again since it wasn't listed as a crossover). It's super good, Danny runs away for reasons unknown (at the beginning of course) and gets caught up in a murder investigation and he suspects the culprit is supernatural so obviously he helps out. The CSI guys are both trying to protect him (thinking he was a target for the murderer) but also trying to uncover his past and the reasons he ran away. When you find out why he ran away, you might be awed like I was (especially when you realize how long it had been since he ran) or you might be unimpressed, but the aftermath and his family/friends finally catching up to him might make up for that. I kinda liked how Vlad was written here too.

Ghost Crimes and its sequels is a Criminal Minds/DP crossover. It's the first in a very long series (currently 500k+ words in total) that expands on the DP world and lore, and also involves a lot more murder, death, blood (and the other related gore-ish stuff), and overall realism. Like, Danny fights what is basically Jack the Ripper and its terrifying. It's kind of like a "dark and gritty" DP (but like, not unbearably or overwhelmingly dark and gritty), angst sprinkled here and there, along with darker themes and less light-hearted issues (mental health/trauma/depression/etc. and neglect/abuse and like, actual competent adults like social workers and stuff are a real thing in this fic). There's a lot going on but it's got its lighter nice moments too (Dani is there and gets to be a part of Danny's family, Val's in on the secret, among other things). Also some of the chapters are illustrated, it's great. Definitely check it out!

Okay that's a lot of fics so I'm gonna stop now. Have fun reading!!

#danny phantom #phanfic #crossover #submission #THIS IS SO GOOD ! #THANK YOU OMG !

[dragonstoravens]

Trinity: First Appearance

Since I haven’t posted many longer excerpts from Rebel Blue, I thought I’d post this short story introducing my boy Trinity and his complicated relationship with the crew of Rebel Blue-- specifically Periwinkle.

A bit of background-- Trinity was originally intended to be a one-off or minor character, and actually started off as a sort of pseudo-villain, working for Fate (the series’ main villain.) This is the first piece I wrote for him, edited and updated to fit his character now.

Trinity now features in Babylon, a several-novels-length offshoot of Rebel Blue’s main story written by myself and @charlottedotexe. His eventual slow-burn romance with Azure was a total surprise, and has lead to me developing this one-off villain into someone I really love! While Trinity still takes some time to be a truly good person, he was always meant to draw the line somewhere, and I think this piece illustrates that really well.

READ ON WATTPAD HERE!

“So… I guess I’ve just seen her around here a couple of times, and I wanted to let her know that I… even exist?” Trinity chuckled self deprecatingly, rubbing the back of his neck with an embarrassed look on his face. Felicia cooed and wiggled around slightly from her position on his lap, reaching up to pinch his cheek.

“Awww, look at little Ty growing up. You’ve been coming here for years, and a pretty girl finally caught your eye? I’m almost jealous.” She giggled as he playfully smacked her hand away. “Tell me about her, then.”

“Well…” Trinity paused, casting his thoughts back to the woman he’d seen in the security footage. He had, in fact, seen her here at Absolute Zero before, but never close enough to describe. All he knew about her was that she usually sat up near the front, always by herself, or chatting with the bartender or even the owner rather than other patrons. Still, the auburn hair and striking height were hard to forget, and really the only reasons he’d recognized her on that recording. The fact she knew the workers here was good, but she was so often alone. It worried him, if he was being honest. Anyone in his position knew loners were the easiest targets. But Felicia was still waiting for him to answer. He let his eyes go a bit far away and misty as he leaned back in the plush booth, a lovestruck smile coloring his face. “She’s real tall. And pretty. Her hair’s long and wavy, it’s… brown? Maybe red. She always dresses so nice. She sounds like maybe she’s British, or from one of their colony planets. I’ve seen her a couple times, but… I never worked up the courage to buy her a drink.”

Beneath his field of vision, Felicia’s eyes narrowed for just a moment. Only a moment, though, and then she returned to her teasing smile, eyes flashing mischievously. “Sounds like someone’s smitten. Why don’t you go talk to her yourself, lover boy? Put that pretty face to good use. If she says no to that, she clearly doesn’t deserve you.” She leaned into him, adding a bit of real encouragement into her tone and ignoring the urge to mix pronouns and risk tipping Ty off that she knew his target as more than just another patron. She wanted his guard down, for one thing, and on the off chance he was telling the truth, maybe she could get him to prove it and actually talk to her in person. But he shook his head, and despite that bashful look on his face as he did it, Felicia’s suspicions were back full force.

“Nah, I can’t do that. What if she’d rather be alone? I don’t wanna force her into anything. I was thinking you girls could get her a note, buy her a drink on me next time she comes in? The ball’s in her court that way.” He shrugs. “If she ignores it, at least I tried, huh?”

As if anyone could force that person into anything. That alone proved he was lying… or that he honestly knew nothing about the person of which he spoke. But there was protocol to follow here, and Felicia was a professional before all else. Sure, Ty had never been anything but respectful and sweet, but almost everyone working here had learned the hard way that sweet things hid poison better than sour.

“Such a dear.” She ruffled his hair, and slid languidly off his lap, trailing her fingers down his neck and shoulder as she pulled away. “Alright, but you know I’ll tell the other girls. Your reputation as a hot-shot lady killer is in danger.” Her voice remained light and flirty, but the warning was real. Unless he changed his tune now, this was going straight to the top.

Trinity laughed, waving a hand at her. “Ah, go ahead. You all call me ‘little Ty’ anyway, it’s not like my reputation here was tough-as-nails in the first place.” Unconsciously, he rubbed a hand along his thigh, feeling for the tiny cybernetic attachment he already knew was there. He’d been around the block enough to know what this bar really was, and to notice that subtle warning from Felicia. That little note of his wouldn’t be staying secret for long, and they both knew it. In an establishment like this, information trade always passed through the top of the pyramid before being sent along to its target. He didn’t know much about the manager here, but he did know it was dangerous to pass information this way, especially in his position. Who knew what his boss would do to him if he found out about this interference. Still, Trinity couldn’t let this slide. He had to warn that poor woman, without doing anything to actively help her. This was the best chance he had.

Felicia giggled, using the charade to cover a disappointed sigh. Well, his loss. “You could at least pretend to be upset. You’re abandoning us for romance, Etta’s gonna be crushed.” She gave him one of her patented cute pouts, to which he responded with a good natured eye roll. “Well, I’m gonna go see some customers that aren’t too distracted by their mystery girl to appreciate me. You know where to send that note of yours, yeah?” 

“Course I do. Thanks, ‘Licia.” Trinity’s eyes trailed her as she made her way back up to the bar. When she disappeared through a door behind the counter, he leaned forward in his booth, pulling the displaced table back towards him and resting his elbows on it. He let the casual, goofy persona of “Ty” slip away, face turning serious as he considered his task. How did you warn a woman about one of the world’s most dangerous men-- without drawing his attention yourself?

~~~

    “You can stop laughing now.”

    A few moments passed as the person Siren was calling caught their breath, letting out an almost musical falling sigh. Their posh, accented voice, something like old Terran British, was still tinged with laughter. “Sorry, darling, but this one really takes the cake, I think. Either he somehow hired someone with a conscience, or this is his worst plan yet.” A second voice on the same end of the voice call broke its silence with a snort.

    “Yeah, Si. I don’t want to make light of another one of these attempts, but… they happen almost every time we go planetside. And I’m not gonna lie, this one was pretty funny.”

    “Stalking is quite the word for it, though,” the first mused. “I think my favorite part is when he insinuates I should leave the planet to avoid this ‘stalker.’ For my own safety, of course, nothing to do with the job I’m working on. What do you think, Cadet?” 

    Before the second person could respond, Siren interrupted with a soft clearing of her throat. “Perry--”

    “I know.” The humor had disappeared from his voice. “I take this sort of thing very seriously, especially considering he’s gotten your operation involved this time. Is everyone cleared out?”

    “Nearly. We don’t want to make the patrons too suspicious, so the rest will report to secure locations after the mole has left. I’m sending an agent out with him, one of his favorites, so it’s nothing unusual for either of them. She can probably hold him on her own, although--”

    “I’ll go,” Cadet interjected, beating Siren to the punch. “No need for Perry to get too close to the creep, that way.” Perry sighed.

    “I suppose it doesn’t matter if I say that’s unnecessary?” 

    “Look, I know you could take him down, but all his boss’ tricks are focused on you. They won’t work as well on me or Si’s agent, and that way you’re free to focus on questioning him. It’s why we’re in a team, Per.” She added a bit of teasing to her tone, and Perry responded with a slightly begrudging hum of assent. Hearing that, Siren continued.

    “Alright, if you’re both set, I’ll ready my agent and wait for your signal. We have two hours. Be safe.” The weight of the last two words seemed somehow directed at both her listeners at once, but with a different meaning for each. Cadet echoed Siren’s unspoken message to her, pressing her fingers to her lips for a moment in a gesture she knew her wife would mimic without even needing to see her. 

    “Love you too, Si.”

    Perry said nothing. Siren’s meaning for her was something she already knew. They also knew they’d disregard it in a second if it meant keeping that bar standing. With a click, the line disconnected, and the clock began to tick.

~~~

    Trinity hoped he was hiding his nervousness alright. He still hadn’t heard anything back from the woman about his message, but today his sensor had picked up new security footage of her. Recent footage, from just hours ago. His boss definitely had it by now, and it meant she definitely hadn’t left the planet. In fact, she seemed to have moved in even closer. So even though there was a chance it’d get him caught, Trinity was back at Absolute Zero. Felicia had even bent the rules a bit and bought him a drink, although he’d been careful to filter out the alcohol through his cybernetics as he drank. He couldn’t afford to be compromised. He tried to pay attention to Felicia’s attempts to cheer him up, but her reassurance that he could talk to his “mystery girl” in person next time she came in didn’t help much. What would he say if she did? And if she didn’t, would he just have to give up? Maybe it wasn’t any of his business, anyway.

    “What’s that?”

    Felicia’s voice jerked him out of his thoughts, and he realized he’d muttered that last bit aloud. “Oh… I mean, I just don’t know if I should get involved in her business anyway. I did say she could ignore me if she wanted. Why can’t I just get over it?” He let his arms slide down across the table in front of him, laying his head on them pitifully. 

    “Aw, Ty. It’s not even for sure yet, and you’re getting all heartbroken?” A flicker of blue registered in the corner of Felicia’s vision, and she surreptitiously glanced down at her right hand where it rested on Trinity’s back, firmly out his sight. Sure enough, the tiny chip embedded in her thumbnail flashed once, twice, and then faded. She tapped the nail twice with her forefinger-- message received-- then slapped Trinity on the back playfully and stood up. “Alright, that’s enough alcohol and self pity for you, babe. We’re going for a walk.”

“Really, now? But--” 

“It’s my job to cheer you up, and that’s not gonna happen if you’re just sitting around here moping. Come on, I know you love Andromeda Park this time of night, we haven’t been in days since you’ve been pining like this.” She leaned in, tucking her arm through his and pulling him out of his chair with strength that would have been surprising if he hadn’t seen it in action so many times before. With a sigh, he allowed her to lead him through the bar and out into the mild night air. They walked slowly, turning down familiar alleys towards the park. Trinity let Felicia’s arm slip from his as he walked, turning a contemplative gaze up to the sky. The slight wind against his face did seem to clear his head a bit. Perhaps she was right, and this really would give him some time to think things through--

Without warning, his right arm was twisted behind his back. Just as he started to struggle, a second pair of hands, these ones gloved, grabbed his other arm and the back of his head in a steely grip, pushing him to his knees and holding his head forward so he couldn’t see his attackers. Trinity swore, cursing himself for being so distracted. Even his cybernetics were no help if he didn’t have line of sight, or at least a hand free to activate the taser function from the port on his thigh. He knew better than to try and speak, let alone yell for help, given the almost unnaturally strong fingers pressing into the base of his skull right where it met his neck. Held like this, he could do nothing but stare down the shadowed stone alley in front of him, waiting to see what would become of him.

A shadow moved at the end of the alley. Moonlight flashed off of a cascade of shining red fabric, shifting to reveal a smooth expanse of pale thigh… and the matte black hilt of a knife, placed just so it would remain concealed beneath the fabric until the wielder chose to reveal it. As the figure took one more slow step forward, new details revealed themselves to Trinity one by one, his brain registering each as if in slow motion. His eyes traced up from the knife… a long way up. The curve of a hip, clad in red. Wrists and neck free of jewelry or adornment, save a thin black metal band tight around one wrist, leaving nothing that could be caught or grabbed. And finally, a curl of auburn hair caught the moonlight like silk, tumbling loose over one bare shoulder. 

“Fuck.” It came out as almost a whisper, his voice cracking a bit, and he cleared his throat. It was an affectation, of course. It was safest to keep trying to sound like Ty, well meaning if a touch dim, though it was tempting to drop character and coldly insist to be allowed to explain himself. “Guess I didn’t need to worry after all.”

Trinity’s mystery woman chuckled slightly, but there was no humor in the sound. She kept her face obscured in shadow— honestly a good move on her part, since with a clear view Trinity could at least try to activate his eye— and tossed her hair back almost contemptuously. “Please. I know why you’re really here. Do you?”

“Do I— of course I know why I’m here!” Because you’re too soft to survive, his brain supplied, unhelpfully. Whenever he was in danger like this, that internal voice sounded uncomfortably like the velvety tones of his employer. You’ll walk right into a death trap if you think you’re defending a defenseless woman from assault, it whispered, but he ignored it, setting his jaw. Defenseless or not, he still stood by his original plan. No one had the defenses to stand up to Fate— the addition of the Jericho company had only made that fact more stark in his mind. He gave up on keeping character. It was easier to be convincing if he truly wasn’t lying to her. He relaxed slightly despite the arms holding him down. Ty might struggle when outnumbered, but Trinity knew better. His words were his most powerful weapon. “Look.” His voice was more even than before, his word choice more eloquent. “I don’t know who you are, and I’ll be the first to admit that I underestimated you, but please at least hear me out. The man I’m talking about is… truly dangerous. It isn’t this job alone, he’s—“

“So you’re one of those.” She smirked slightly, lowering her voice for a moment. “Azzy owes me 10 cred, she thought you were one of the less stupid ones. You really think you’re the one who came up with this plan?”

Trinity opened his mouth to tell her that in fact, he had, but the woman held out a finger and the hand on the back of his neck tightened almost imperceptibly. He closed it again. 

“Let’s see if I can predict this story. You’re new still, so you’re trailing his footsteps like a little puppy, trying to learn all you can. He can do anything, after all, open and shut. You want that kind of power, so you do whatever he says. Until suddenly a simple job starts dragging on far longer than it should.” She tapped a finger to her lips in a gesture of vaguely mocking consternation. “How can this be? It doesn’t make sense, until one day he just so happens to let something slip to you. An accident, of course. A bit of footage, or a location, or maybe some sad poetry fragment he’s written on the back of a lipstick stained napkin.” Her words grew more and more sarcastic. “You, being the charitable type of power hungry pup, are worried for this poor unknown woman’s safety.” The oddly bitter emphasis on the word woman threw him for a moment, but she moved on before he could puzzle it out. “So you track her down, leaving a sweet little trail of breadcrumbs along with your warning— but it’s alright, it’s all behind his back! And you can go back home to your war profiteering and dirty money, content in your own altruism. Does that sound about right?”

Trinity just gaped at her for a moment before pulling his thoughts together. “Listen to me. I truly don’t enjoy seeing a woman in danger—” She frowned, cutting him off.

“Not a woman, but continue. I’m curious to hear your side.” The tone was biting, and the odd emphasis before suddenly made a lot more sense.

“Oh. My apologies, I assumed.”

“I noticed. Most do. Continue.”

“Right.” He pursed his lips. “Well. Moving past the sheer amount of sarcastic bullshit in your little story, I believe you have the bones of the issue. I won’t argue with you on your assessment of my character, but there’s one thing you’ve missed.”

“And what is that?” To his surprise, they sounded genuinely interested. He filed away that tidbit for later.

“He didn’t ‘let something slip’ to me. I don’t act on things I’ve simply stumbled upon.”

“Please. You think you’re the first to believe you got your information on me genuinely? Of your own merit? With the amount of stock you seem to put in his abilities, that seems rather conceited of you.” They sighed, almost seeming to deflate a bit from that perfectly poised stance. “He knows you’re here, and he knows I’m here. And if that establishment is destroyed tonight along with the livelihood of all who work there, it’s on you.”

Trinity flinched slightly at the accusation, but kept his gaze level. “He does not know that I’m here. I swear that.”

The figure pinched the bridge of their nose. “After all of this, that’s the hill you’re dying on?”

A rough sigh came from Trinity’s left side, and the hand on his neck tightened again as one of his captors finally spoke in a low, slightly gravelly voice he didn’t recognize. “We can’t keep dragging this out, Per. Two minutes, then you gotta call it.”

“I know.” They ran the hand that had been pinching their nose back through their hair, and took a half step forward. “Ok, then. What makes you so sure?”

Trinity bit the inside of his lip, the way he did when he didn’t want people to see him sweat. This was getting dangerous, in more ways than one. The longer this went on, the more likely it became that his boss would find out somehow, and this person was right— anything that happened would be on him. If he didn’t say something soon to convince them, he had no doubt they could have him killed or detained as quickly as they had subdued him in the first place. But the only way to prove what he knew was true was to reveal something he’d managed to keep secret for four years, now. Two minutes. It’d probably be less if the hand on his neck had anything to say about it, so he didn’t exactly have much time to come up with a better plan. Fuck it, if he was dead either way he might as well die knowing he was in the right.

“I’m sure because the way I saw it was with my cybernetic eye that two people in the entire galaxy even knew existed... until just now. It’s one of a kind. You were right, I have been watching him. It’s the best way to learn. So I planted my sensor in his office, and watched him creep on security footage of you alone in there for hours when he thought no one could see. That’s no convenient slip up.” He didn’t bother to disguise the disgust in his voice. He respected the man, but this was one thing he couldn’t abide.

“Cybernetics…” They lifted their wrist to their mouth to speak. That black band must be some kind of communication device. “Azure. Is that possible?”

There was a pause as they listened to some response Trinity couldn’t hear, then their gaze slowly panned back to him, staring him down like a hawk to a rabbit.

“Secret, one of a kind cybernetics. An interesting story, but not an easy one to make up on the fly. Either you’re a far better liar than you seem and have been completely in on his plans from the beginning, or…”

“He’s telling the truth.”

Oh. So that’s where Felicia has gotten to. In the heat of the moment he hadn’t really thought about that until he heard her voice from his right side— his other captor. Wonderful.

“You know about this?”

“I knew his eye was cybernetic. He played it like a fancy prosthetic, but that’d make sense if it’s one of a kind. What he’s saying isn’t impossible, and he’s a regular. I know when he’s lying.” The red clad figure nodded slowly, processing Felicia’s endorsement.

“I trust you to do your job.” Even while they spoke with Felicia, they still hadn’t broken that piercing gaze, focusing on Trinity. “Well. I suppose you’re a first, then. In that case, take this advice.” Their weight shifted slightly, and Trinity could almost feel the danger radiating from them. The energy was spine-chillingly similar to the danger that Fate projected just by entering a room, a mirrored twin. “Know that I know far more about your employer and his abilities than you do. I can’t stop you from going back to him, and you can’t stop me from ruining this lovely, easy job you’re trying to finish up.” They spoke with perfect confidence, without a hint of conceit. “He and his other lap dogs will continue to pull this kind of shite, it’s a given. But if you ever try to track me down again, you will die. Are we clear?”

“Crystal.” Trinity narrowed his eyes. “And so we’re clear on one more thing— I’d never bring harm to this place. It’s been as much a home to me as anywhere.”

“People like you never do, intentionally. That’s why you’re less trustworthy than the ones who do intend harm.” The low light of the alley caught a hint of a bitter smirk as it crossed her lips. “At least you know where they stand. Cadet, let’s go.”

The grip on his left arm and neck loosened, and he felt his unknown captor shift to stand next to him. “Four, hold him till we give the all clear. Then Siren says protocol’s down to your discretion.”

“Got it.” Felicia took over the grapple, pushing him further to the ground. His cheek pressed up against the pavement, the craned position of his head and neck keeping him from seeing anything but a sliver of wall in front of him. He sighed, listening to the thud of two sets of heavy boots as they faded down the alley and into the sounds of the night.

“...Four, huh?”

“You’ve been a regular long enough. In your line of business, you suspected. Just like I suspected ‘Ty’ was a front.” Felicia’s voice was much more matter of fact than he was used to. “It’s a useful place, and you can play all sides, but there’s always priority one.”

“I get it. I could’ve put the place in danger.”

“It’s home for a lot more than you.”

“I know. I was telling the truth, but if I can’t come back—“

“That’s up to me.” Felicia glanced down at her thumbnail as the tiny chip flashed again. All clear. She lightly moved off of him, releasing his arm from the position she’d held it in twisted behind his back, and Trinity could see a compact blaster in her palm. She flicked her wrist, and it disappeared. “I say you can, if you can take it for what it is.”

“Just a bar. People gossip and flirt and trade information. It’s a good place to land at the end of a day.” He shrugged, rubbing his shoulder. “You could have dislocated that, you know?” 

“Fair enough.” She ignored his last comment, and tapped her nail twice to acknowledge. “Maybe I’ll see you again then, Ty.” The name was a promise in its own way— he could keep his cover if she could keep hers. “Stay out of trouble.” 

With that, she turned and began walking purposefully back towards Absolute Zero, leaving Trinity alone in the alley to nurse his bruised shoulder and pride.

#writeblr #writing #writers on tumblr #my writing #sci fi #rebel blue #trinity

[thecrenellations]

Return of the Thief Notes, Part Two: The Book of Pheris, Volume 2, Chapters 1-5

Notes from my first read, October 2020. (Part One | Part Three | TaT)

Contents: Me losing my mind in multiple ways each chapter, helpful links, nighttime garden cousins, an Irene pun, notes from my second read, “mwt is just like going for it,” and “this is so fucked up and heartwarming.”

Format: Page number. My thoughts (Context?)

Volume 2

Illustration

Book 2 bro

Now we’re caught up and changed forever by lots of things

What printer’s apprentice made this?

Elephants!

Chapter 1

175. me too, Costis, me too. I am so tired. (it’s hard to sleep when your brain and heart and everything are fizzing because you’re reading Return of the Thief for the first time and a new Queen’s Thief book for the last time) 

176. Klimun + Gerosthenes vibes [moon doodle]

Holes in documents. That’s cute

Gen!!! <3

Wtf Ansel was hoodwinked!

177. The Queen waited

They’re ridiculous

Hi Pheris

Wtf he stole her earrings for Melheret?!?

178. Excuse me??? What is this book (sleeveless leather tunic)

He still roams!!!

Tattoos!

179. a sentence I never fucking expected to read ever “The absence of tattoos…”

180. that’s interesting

Stacked like kindling wow oh dear

181. She wants him to move in lol

Lol sorry Ion

Did she just want them to leave the room?

182. I can’t with this… I can’t. Why is sex symbol Relius canon. (the play that featured him! It’s great, it’s great, it was just a lot to take in!)

Silver crown?

183. Cleon! Rude!

Did they call Costis to deck him?

Queen scene!! <3

184. This is an epic. Abt Costis. Dirty stranger

185. he’s “the high king”

Lol

187. prophet (Pheris sure makes Costis sound like one)

Shut up Piloxides

188. resources for war! (book launch foreshadowing part two! She talked a lot about this kind of thing as well, and recommended the book Alexander the Great and the Logistics of the Macedonian Army)

189. “we”

What were you gonna say (Gen almost says something to Costis part one)

193. RIP The Magus Archives … it was not to be. Yet.

194. Melenze’s doorstep. Why? Bc Melenze is Ferria’s dog. (idk dude that line from ACoK has just never left me)

195. This is … a big war

196. Oh gen

Nighttime garden cousins.

Chapter 2

197. wtf did Relius think of that play

Also … not a peep from the sacred mountain huh

198. wtf will happen with Cleon

with Erondites

with THE MOUNTAIN

a lot going on

everyone was in that room but Kamet! So close!

199. Cute Fordad + Gen friendship (I never said these notes would make me look smart)

Same 2 T + R! :) It’s not them is it? (I NEVER SAID THESE NOTES WOULD MAKE ME LOOK SMART)

Poor Teleus

200. gdi Gen

Excuse me? Is he worried for Pheris??? (taking his tablet)

They trust each other! C’mon!

Sure he has reasons

202. oh dear. :( that’s … the worst cover story

Also falling

203. wow almost like a story huh

Ula’s altar :(

Why haven’t we had a Gen and Costis scene IN THREE BOOKS

205. I just … I don’t know if he’s just miserable or if it’s all a plan. I feel like I should know it’s all a plan. But he really feels like he has far to go. He’s just a mess and the same and so different. (having a small Gen meltdown)

205. he did give him the gun

Odd that he missed Quedue

206. he’s gonna bite them (buckle up! it’s abdication time!)

207. Power. Power. Power. Power.

Thx 4 the editorializing Pheris

208. Gen is making choices. That’s a choice.

209. There’s KoA down the drain

Aaaand he’s Eugenides

“Eugenides stared into the future”

The page of like 3 different tumblr posts: Trophy husband, Library, No! yes!

210. make sure he doesn’t leave lol

211. Pheris :(

Also fucked up timing for Irene

I love them

212. again with the birthday book

He’s still the king in the narration

Go on the roof! So close!

213. EUGENIDES IS ALWAYS APPROPRIATE my motto

Viper! Bastard!

Oh shit. I love them.

214. “our treaty” “our queen”

AAAH! Wedding night!

Asked her to leave!

Smash Erondites and peace out, literally

215. a frank talk

HE SAID IT.

216. The Bructs?

Wait is this his grandfather (taking a moment to remember all about Susa)

Also that’s Costis territory

217. who is this lion

218. #3 to Gen.

219. hmmm ring

There’s been a lot to unpack wow.

Did this happen, Pheris? Pheris?! 

220. Atté atté!

(Dear reader: for some strange reason, I completely forgot about taking notes on the final pages of this chapter. These notes are from when I reread those pages a few minutes later.)

Erondites full cup to brimming

The Pherises…

We must think of others before ourselves … occasionally

I do not like Orutus

Don’t fence Costis in! Does this count as prison? No (I had a square on my bingo board for “someone ends up in prison” ... but it turned out to be for someone else)

221. damn Costis

Aaah

Costis …

Irene… your jokes (I mean, it’s a joke, but also it is very real for her.)

SHE SAID IT!

My heart

222. where is Relius going?

SPYING

What you see and what you think it means (I love these instructions/this quote so much)

So are Susa + Erondites 2gether or what (listen ... proximity generates meaning in these books)

Also, like

What can

I say

WHAT CAN I SAY (Hell yeah! Never more glad to be wrong about the magus)

[page long list of doubles and parallels - from Cleons and Pherises and Ions to god-character and character-character connections]

Also the fact that in KoA and TaT Relius was like … oh … no … I just live a gentle life being friends with my king and queen and being scholarly. But no. He’s SPYING and TRAVELING MYSTERIOUSLY and has MANY LOVERS and also has been WITH TELEUS ALL ALONG and there is a PLAY written about him and he has a ~messenger~ network and PLAYS THE FLUTE and DOESN’T MAKE HIS BED and DISLIKES MATH and oh and he’s VERY HANDSOME! (Yes I was losing it, I hope my note from after the poem helps show some of the feelings behind this rant.)

Fucking … Wine shop. Should have known.

Chapter 3

224. ominous

Hello magus!

Sophos … babe (his impatience!)

225. Magus … cool your socks that’s your bff (he’s just describing Helen’s dead body! Fun!!!!)

In the van

That was good I love them

Why is it Couples Hour?

226. finally we’re out of the capital of Attolia

Ok they’re so cute

She was NEVER Helen in ACoK narration! 

Also – Pheris. This is all Pheris. (Pheris plus information others told him!)

227. Bringing each other up to date – that’s their thing. Talking forever

All this talk of shooting Therespides

228. EX FUCKING SCUSE ME (time to learn a lot about the country of Eddis)

He was 15! (or almost 15)

He didn’t know! Or did he!

The MoW!

All thru Pheris

Fuck you magus

When did he know

229. EXCUSE ME

The emeralds?

Assumed the worst?

That classic quote about little to do with winter but with “seducing other people’s lovers”

230. yeah Sophos that’s a lost cause (“spare me my blushes”)

Also she didn’t answer you

What are they laughing about (the generally nameless men we’re learning many things about this chapter)

233. Gen I think it’s fair to say that was a mistake

234. wtf Gen

GEN! he just. Had those. (the jewels!)

Her crown

I cannot

235. Gen!

237. Crash

Her CHANGES

238. THESE TWO

239. called annux

Yeah it’s like … a family meeting (the war council)

Bring your father to work day

241. Oh no.

Stenides! Boagus!!!!!!!

EDDIS!

Wolves! Lol

mwt is just like going for it

243. aww

Eddis > Boagus > Gen

244. Yeah I’m with her on this. (“if that doesn’t frighten you, it should”)

Chapter 4

245. Gen and Magus scene yes!

Two people affected by his long hair (Gen and the magus? I think?)

Pheris are you there?

Gen … you used to wish yourself out of existence

Wow

Hair vanity

Yeah also battlefield

Ion is a darling tbh

248. Is he. Is he going to fight all of them

Also they are all his cousins huh

AULUS! I liked you!

Same, Hilarion

Taking a page out of Costis’s book?

You have definitely seen it before. (I mistook his lie for truth!)

Will Costis hear about this? (please)

249. #4 to Gen!

Pheris where are you

Why doesn’t the Continent want to conquer them (do I get partial credit for this)

A tattoo!

250. “Do not offend the gods”

Honestly … too bad Helen DIDN’T do this

251. he said he’d give all he had

I’m sure there are rules

253. Just men? :( (let everybody fight him!)

Ornon is back! I mean, of course he is

Also yea they practice

HELLO ORNON

A house being built … or one knocked down. Nice

Is Teleus in on this?

254. Pheris called him my king!

255. I wanna know which guards though

:( he’d been faking

Kicked him in the head (ouch)

256. “when he fell”

I … don’t like this

He never gives up. The thieves don’t have limits. They have flash points.

Stepped on his hand

“Enough Gen” – what Irene said?

257. :( :( :( :( :( :( :(

The magus. I forgot he was there.

The magus said … nevermind …

The magus is probs very into this as a cultural thing. Also he was talking to the MoW

Pigeon. The sky. :( Like in TT (OH BOY, THE SKYYYY)

If there was a god, Pheris would see…

258. They’ve, they’ve been through a lot.

Oh god what’s next

259. I … no. not in his arms to the palace.

The palace where….

The stairs…

They are all 3 lookers. Basilisks and brass and lead

I hate this. But I love this.

I will someday see this differently.

Ah yes… the grunt. Approval.

260. Honestly, this is so fucked up and heartwarming. These books.

Lol don’t defend Hilarion, we know him

Eddis visits him.

Attolia watches him.

261.WTF Gen. I knew it. Why.

Crying or laughing? Crying? :(

How does this not undermine her now that he is her king?

But … what he wouldn’t do for her.

262. “he did fine”

This book is like… Reasons Gen Says Sorry

So, so… - Helen

GEN!

263. I am right. I am always right. It’s a curse.

Helen :( :( :(

The amount of times these people have seen him beaten.

He’s like … self destructive, but in a way that gives himself more power. Which he hates.

Gen, let them in. Let them in.

Chapter 5

264. honeycomb

OH NO. is it happening?

266. I’m just supposed to accept this?!! What does it mean?!

267. … a my king moment … important

But like … now can he fight?

Caryatid? [doodle after I looked it up]

268. Teleus!

C’mon Teleus. Everyone you love or respect loves him!

Honestly Pheris and Teleus … not a duo I expected

THESE TWO ARE SO DEDICATED TO TELLING HIM THAT! Ok I should chill. At least he said “may.” These are like … Pheris’s life lessons.

Honestly… I love that Teleus likes poetry, or at least likes it for Relius.

269. Lol Legarus. It’s been years! I mean, I guess that was a big deal for him… (almost being executed is a big deal for most people.)

Does he not love Gen because of Relius? Because Gen manipulated him? Because he keeps sending away his successor? Why on earth not! Hop on that train! (...)

It’s interesting that their relationship is the one that touches Pheris, not Gen and Irene. Hm.

Also … “Idiot.” The parallels.

“relatively gently” (it’s so good)

~Teleus here to talk about love~

This book is full of surprises.

270. That is NOT the bright side, Gen (“I could use my newfound authority to insist on going into battle”)

271. BUNNY! Wtf is a wineglass warrior

Very cute everyone, good job.

Still sad about Helen’s tears.

271. Gen. Don’t say these things. [volcano doodle]

272. SEE I was worried about this! The doubt!

I am not ok

This is TOO MANY Eddisian Revelations (Lader time)

Yeah. Wow.

273. Cleon x5

I … his grandfather

No.

Baby Helen begging

How did Pheris get this scene

Gen chose Cleon for his plan

275. IRENE WITH THE STATS!

276. lol Gen

My brother Sounis!

277. Missing Relius club.

Where is he though

Yes! Sophos Gen food fight!

Grapes!

“Wisdom”

He’s “the king” here and in KoA bc that’s the story but also that’s who he is to Pheris and Costis

278. So how did that Irene and MoW meeting go anyway?

How does Aulus know???

Thief short story! Probably terrible to reread, oh no

279. Are … are Aulus and Boagus together???! (“his slightly smaller partner”)

This feels … potentially traumatic … but fun? Idk

Fleece

280. This dang book. No rules!

The chandelier! So dramatic!

Mwt had … a lot to put into this one. A lot. A lot.

283. “not the Thief he was chasing”

284. The queens! The salute!

He can’t give this up.

Official Worries:

100,000 soldiers heading towards Kamet

Re: Lyopidus, Gen called Sophos his brother. Helen apparently might BE his sister. Temenus and Stenides are also going to a war where 9/10 will probably die.

Also

the MoW could have been a king if he’d stolen Helen’s throne. A lot there.

why does this book have the vibe of the library post, my comic from 2010, the king and queen interactions here, and the military tactics dream

#part twooo #word clouds next #the queen's thief #return of the thief #mwt #rott spoilers #return of the thief spoilers #something i

[northoftheroad]

The Robin 80th Anniversary Special

It's not a secret that I'm first and foremost a Dick Grayson fan, whether he comes dressed as Robin, Nightwing, Batman or something else. But I try to be charitable and be happy for fans of the other Robins that they got a pice of the birthday cake, i. e. the Robin 80th Anniversary Special.

For your enjoyment (?), here are my thoughts about the book. Spoilers ahead, obviously – don't like, don't read!

I honestly thought almost all of the stories were ok – but pretty forgettable. Marv Wolfman's spin on Dick leaving to become Nightwing, in "A little nudge" (art by Tom Grummett and Scott Hanna), is probably the only one I will remember and reference in the future. I don't know if or how it is supposed to fit into the (any?) continuity, but as far as I can see, it works nicely in the current setting.

Dick's parting from Robin and Bruce was successively portrayed as more and more hostile. When he originally left Robin to become Nightwing (1983–1984), the two still had a good relationship. This changed in comics to, first, that Bruce decided to retire Robin, and then to that Bruce outright fired Dick and kicked him out of the cave. This lead to that their relationship was portrayed as poor, antagonistic even, for a good many comics years.

The bad mood was picked up by Batman The Animated Series, where Dick left being resentful of Bruce and his methods.

I don't have a lot of good things to say about what has happened to the Bat-family after Flashpoint. But from what we've seen from scattered panels, Dick was the one who decided he wanted to leave Robin. You can read Marv Wolfman's story as confirmation of that. Which is nice.

Bruce is only a little bit of a jerk in this story, being utterly rigid about that Robin has to follow orders. Dick, however, chooses to stay with a kid that had been shot instead of following the criminals.

Dick has had it with Bruce's rules and leaves the cave, but he says "later" rather than "goodbye".

It's made clear that those strict rules were Bruce's way to say, "I know you've grown up, and you should move on; I'll be fine without you."

Batman # 408, where Bruce decides to retire Robin because he got scared when the Joker shot Dick, is firmly established in my mind as the "correct" leaving story in my mind. It was the only one I had read and knew of for many years, and the two still part on decent terms. But Marv Wolfman's 80th Anniversary version has a lot going for it.

On to the rest of the stories...

"Aftershocks" By Chuck Dixon, art Scott McDaniel and Rob Hunter.

Set during Cataclysm (a storyline from 1998) where Dick lived in Blüdhaven before he moved back to Gotham and became Batman. It's an action-filled story where (fingerstripe) Nightwing comes to Gotham after an earthquake has hit the city.

It's interesting to read this, living through the corona crisis that is going on right now. I don't know how it is where you live, but where I am, people are setting up networks to help people who can't go out to shop or walk the dog, University students are helping kids do their math lessons with the help of Facebook, people make masks for health workers etc. But when Chuck Dixon writes what happens after a catastrophe, Dick has to fight his way through masked thugs who are trying to rob an ambulance of "painkillers and tranks" when he tries to save a cab from falling with a damaged bridge. A woman is giving birth inside the car, and the story ends with that the mother wants to name the boy after Nightwing.

"Well...Robin works, right", he says.

"Team building" by Devin Grayson, art Dan Jurgens and Norm Rapund.

Well, I'll always soak up everything that has to do with Dick and the Titans – Teen Titans, New Teen Titans, Titans, any Titans...

Devin Grayson wrote The Titans 1999–2000, which is the setting of this story. Most of it takes place inside a H.I.V.E. locale, where an exasperated boss (Damien Darkh) chews out his soldiers after a fight with the Titans. But Darkh decides not to kill the lot of them, because they did distract the Titans while he stole a red crystal/power source. Of course, it turns out Dick is the soldier who has kept his helmet on; he takes the crystal with him and gives Darkh a bit of advice on team-building on his way out.

"Generally speaking, fear of execution isn't a great motivator. I've found basic team-building and morale-boosting to be much more effective. Like, I'm just spitballing here, but... You ever consider a pizza night?"

Well, it did keep me amused, and it shows us that Dick is a good leader and strategist, (and a great acrobat who manages to get out of the H.I.V.E. uniform with one hand, on the way out), although it isn't exactly a surprise that Dick was in the building when you get near the end.

"The Lesson Plan" by Tom King and Tim Seeley, art Mikel Janín.

Now, I do like some things about the Grayson run, but with a bit of distance, I've realized it was mostly the art. The sexualization of Dick and how King and Seely wrote him as a guy who jumps first and plans never got tiresome. This story is in-character for Grayson; Dick is accompanied by a girl (Paris) from St Hadrian's on a mission, and on the way, he remembers the lessons Batman gave him and imparts his own interpretation of them to Paris. As is Batman says, "plan everything", and Dick says "Improvise. Leap first... figure it all out on the way down." Ergo, classic King and Seeley. Also, it is possibly implied Dick made out with a beautiful girl that turned out to be gorilla in disguise...? Yep, vintage King and Seeley.

Other than that, I don't have a big problem with the story. Some things ring true to me – as when Dick remembers Batman saying, "At their core, people are cowardly and self-serving. Trust no one until you know them. And even then, never completely". And what Dick says is, "Give the benefit of the doubt until you gotta knock 'em out."

For my own peace of mind, I'm reading this as Dick is half-joking with his advice. It's not like we've never seen him make plans and be suspicious post-Flashpoint.

On a side note, one of the best characterizations of Dick Grayson to my mind is a panel from Black Mirror. When Dick explains he had injected James Gordon Jr with a subdermal tracer, and says about himself, "I am a softie. And I do try to see the best in people... but that doesn't mean I'm stupid."

Detective Comics # 881. By Scott Snyder, art Jock and Francesco Francavilla.  

"More Time" by Judd Winnick, art Dustin Nguyen.

Jason has a cute story about him repairing Thomas Wayne's watch as a present to Bruce. He started the work as a tiny Robin (too tiny, in my opinion, but with Dustin Nguyen on art it probably couldn't turn out any other way) and finished the work as Red Hood. Jason delivers the present to Bruce on his birthday, placing it on the Batmobile while it is parked in a Gotham alley.

"Extra Credit" by Adam Beechen, art Freddie E. Williams II.

Tim has an appointment with the guidance counsellor at Gotham City High School. Tim sees a future in law enforcement (that's the first I've heard of that, but I'm no expert on Tim) and he's adopted (again, something I haven't seen post-Flashpoint). But the counsellor doubts that Tim will be admitted because he has nothing to show when it comes to extracurricular activities. It's kind of a fun few pages where the counsellor suggests things that Tim could do, and Tim thinks about what he does as Robin on his spare time.

"Boy Wonders" by James Tynion IV, art Javier Fernandez.

Tim, Red Robin, is unsure what he wants to do with his life and goes to his brothers? fellow Robins? for advice.

I know emotions have been running high because Dick tells Tim that he is "demonstrably smarter" than he is, which makes it sound as if Dick is not really smart at all.

Again, for my peace of mind, I choose to read this as I want: that "big brother" Dick is encouraging, he has always thought highly of Tim, he has no ego to preserve. This doesn't make Dick a reliable narrator on the subject, and the page ends with that Tim thinks "He was the first. He's the best. He's always going to be the role model. "So, two brothers who admire each other.

Tim also talks to Jason and Tim, and the story ends with that he tells Batman he wants to start Gotham Knights protocol, the team in Detective Comics (Rebirth.) 2016-2018.

"Fitting In" by Amy Wolfram, art Damion Scott.

Stephanie, as Robin has problems because Tim's Robin suit doesn't fit her female body. But at the end of the day, Bruce gives Stephanie her own "changing room" in the Bat-cave, because she's female.

...are Bruce and Alfred idiots? Did Dick, Jason and Tim have exactly the same body type when they were Robin? Stephanie deserved a story worth being told, not this one.

"My Best Friend" by Peter J. Tomasi, art Jorge Jimenez.

Jonathan Kent writes a school essay about his best friend, Damian. As he writes the words on his laptop at home, they are illustrated with pcitures of the two as both Robin and Superboy, and as Damian and Jon in civvies. Tomasi and Jimenez worked with Super Sons (2017–2019), and though I didn't read that, I'm pretty sure this story is an extra chapter in that series.

"Bat and Mouse" by Robbie Thompson, art Ramon Villalobos.

It's not the worst story in the book, but somehow the one I disliked the most. It is part of what is going on in Teen Titans and Bat-titles right now; we see Alfred's tombstone and how Batman and Robin have a strained relationship and difficulties in communicating. I'm not keeping up with what is going on with Damian and Bruce in detail, so I really can't say whether this story is consistent with how things have been going lately. I'll let Bruce-and-Damian fans take that ball.

To be honest, my reaction to "Bat and Mouse" is probably due to that I really, really don't like what's happened in the Bat titles lately. I firmly hope that the current situation will be changed and Alfred will be alive again, and I wish I could go back and re-read this book years from now without being reminded of this very dark time when DC seemingly doesn't want any money from me for new comics...

Being who I am, I probably take it waaaaay too seriously to try to understand where/if these stories fit in the DC continuity... The writers have probably (rightly) thought more about writing a good story than making it consistent with any grand plan for a timeline for all of the DC universe. But whatever.

The Grayson story clearly happens in a post-Flashpoint universe, as does Damian's and Tim's stories. But Tim says he's adopted, which I believe has never been said outright post-Flashpoint. And Stephanie has as far as I know not been Robin in this continuity. Chuck Dixon's Nightwing story is explicitly set during Cataclysm (a storyline from 1998) where Dick lived in Blüdhaven before he moved back to Gotham and became Batman. Post-Flashpoint, he moves to Blüdhaven for the first time in Nightwing vol 4., so Dixon's story should take place in the old continuity.

On the other hand. The last pages of the book are made to look like profile overviews in the Bat-computer and use pictures from different Robin runs. If the snippets of information are supposed to be the current continuity for the Robins, a lot from the pre-Flashpoint universe is back in canon.

Shortly, Dick was adopted (that's the word they use), formed the Teen Titans, moved to Blüdhaven and was Agent 37 for a while. Blüdhaven comes before Agent 37, but it's not explicitly stated when he first moved there. Because if Dick was in Blüdhaven before his time with Spyral, it is inconsistent with parts of Rebirth Nightwing. (Which I can live with...)

Jason's story starts as the street kid who tries to steal the tires of the Batmobile, his stint as Robin was short, and today, Red Hood has formed a tenuous alliance with Batman. Tim uncovered Batman's secret and made a bid to become the new Robin – and his new moniker "Drake" is acknowledged. Stephanie was Robin for a very short while. Damian was created with genetic material that Talia stole after a romantic tryst with Bruce, and he was bred to be an assassin.

Personally, of course, I think that Dick Grayson was worth more of an effort from DC on his 80th anniversary. But on the whole, the things we got were decent, "A little nudge" gave me something I will keep with me, and several of the covers are great.

(The cover photo is still pinched from Dan Jurgens' Twitter – I haven't bought all of the variant covers.)

#Dick Grayson #Robin #Nightwing #Jason Todd #Tim Drake #Damian Wayne #80 years with Dick Grayson

[moviegroovies]

i feel like i haven’t done an actual review on this blog in months, so get hype, everybody, for my incoherent, unedited thoughts on the fly (1986). 

(i actually watched this movie for the first time about a week ago and should have written this review at a similar point in time, but there’s nothing i can do about that now)

(just know that it’s starting to get fuzzy is all.)

so the thing about the fly is... it’s pretty gross. like before i say anything else about the quality, or even how enjoyable i found it, i’ve gotta be upfront and say that my main takeaway was really this big, resounding ew. by the end of the movie, what starts as an attractive, confident jeff goldblum has become an oozing, seeping creature of mucus and weird hairs. just for that, it’s kind of hard to watch.

which isn’t to say i didn’t like it, because i did. 

it’s a good story. the effects are pretty fantastic, and cronenberg’s trademark body horror, while nasty, made for a good, campy sci-fi/horror story, and really, all i look for in a movie is camp, sci-fi, and horror elements. so it checks those boxes pretty well.

the thing that kind of holds me back on this movie is its treatment of women, or more specifically, the treatment of the main female character, veronica quaife. veronica is the primary love interest, pursued by both main character seth brundle and supporting character stathis borans, and boy, she gets treated like shit from both of them. i’ve heard arguments that say the second act of the fly feels like a different movie entirely from the first act (the first act having a lighter, softer tone and 80% less body horror, unless you count what happened to that poor baboon), but i honestly can’t see it; there isn’t a part of the movie i can identify wherein the tone suddenly changes. it’s just been dark from the start, and getting darker.

stathis borans apparently exists as a character to be a sort of romantic foil to brundle in his treatment of veronica. at first, it’s pretty easy to identify. stathis comes off as a dick from the start, pursuing ronnie jealously and doing petty things to spite her, like threatening to run the teleporter story after veronica has shelved it. at this point, seth hasn’t yet started to ooze and drip and puke on his food to dissolve it, so he’s got a pretty good shot at coming out ahead in a comparison. still, if you’re really watching, brundle doesn’t really respect her autonomy a whole lot more. their very first scene together, brundle insists that veronica come back to his apartment with him, and won’t take no for an answer, hounding her until she eventually gives in and follows. it’s not that stathis does respect veronica, or that his treatment, at least to start, is any better, but the difference is in the way that they’re framed. borans is a dick, and we’re meant to think that about him. brundle’s unrelenting pursuit of veronica is softened by a geeky exterior that makes his harassment cute. i’m honestly not sure if we’re supposed to excuse his behavior here or not--on one hand, he’s the “hero,” and if the romantic subplot has any chance in hell of landing, then we probably shouldn’t be reading him as a chauvinistic asshole. on the other hand, it definitely does foreshadow what we see of him later on. 

hm. 

another dark shadow over seth’s character is his actions upon veronica leaving unexpectedly. they share their “is this a romance?” scene, which i’ll have to be honest and say that i found endearing, but then veronica gets stathis’s petty threat and leaves to contain it--an action she’s undertaking FOR SETH, given that it’s him who wants the teleporters to be kept under wraps until he’s ready to unveil them--and seth instantly becomes just as jealous as borans. he drinks for the melodrama, and then, despite having no actual proof that veronica is cheating (and really, no real reason to think so at all, beyond stathis’s name on the portfolio thing), he decides to rush into an extremely dangerous experiment that he wasn’t supposed to undertake for weeks. does he want to hurt himself? i’m not sure. is he spiting veronica? almost certainly.

things naturally deteriorate from there. seth comes out of the experiment feeling better than he has in his life, and for a little while, things seem to be great. he reconciles with veronica. he’s got superhuman strength. he’s suddenly become an insatiable sexual dynamo.

...which is another thing.

if the beginning of the end wasn’t seth getting into the transporter with the fly, it’s probably the scene where seth tries to pressure veronica into going another round after she’s already complained of being exhausted. his stamina is just as superhuman as the rest of him now, but she’s being worn out, and when she finally pushes back against him, he becomes manic, trying to drag her into the transporter so that she might be made as godlike as him (yeah, good luck with that, seth) and lashing out when she declines. from there, he deals with his emotions poorly again and goes out to a bar, where he breaks a man’s arm and hustles another girl into coming home with him--a girl whom he also tries to force into the transporter, only to be stopped by veronica, who’s Had Enough.

good for her!

that’s when things start getting nasty and gooey, so i’m gonna cool it with the plot summary now. let’s just say he turns into a fly, she freaks out about it, things are bad. veronica goes to stathis borans, her only confidante (as laughable a title as that might be for a dick like him), and that’s sort of the point where he becomes a little more sympathetic. 

i’ve gotta be honest. i really liked stathis, generally. not all the extra-creepy shit from the beginning, but once seth gets bad enough that stathis is preferable in comparison, he starts to be forced into a role where he acts like a goddamn human being, and the “confidante” role is played more seriously. of course, all of this with the disclaimer that i have terrible taste in fictional men and that i thought the scene where he pretended to “worship” her in the department store was kind of sexy, but he genuinely did step up to the plate, if only because of the absolute horrors that his foil was then undergoing. at any rate, his fingernails were intact, so i don’t think it’s unreasonable for veronica to have gone to him as the better option.

this is also the part of the movie where the pregnancy scare took center stage, and i have to be honest, that was the part of the movie that probably upset me the most. personally, as the unwilling owner of a uterus, the idea of pregnancy in general is fucking horrific to me. veronica’s naked horror at realizing that she’s carrying the baby of the mutated genetic horror seth brundle has become felt real, not only in the context of the actual horror she would have had inside her (although the dream sequence did a very good job of illustrating that), but also in the more personal context of the fear of pregnancy in a person who doesn’t want it. seth’s reaction to her pregnancy versus stathis’s is another reason i came to like stathis best by the end of the film. of course, seth wasn’t in his right mind by the point when he found out, but he begged her to keep it despite her fear and the probable consequences, whereas stathis’s face showed the same dawning horror i felt upon her announcement, and he helped her to get the abortion she wanted. there’s probably some comments about agency to be made here, at the risk of gassing up a character who is still, essentially, an asshole.

(side note: i haven’t seen the fly 2, but the fact that the whole plot is based around veronica keeping the baby after all that and then dying... sours it for me. to say the least.)

then, of course, there’s the grand finale. the three main players in the story settle into their final roles once and for all: veronica is the damsel in distress, for all the discussion of her agency, stathis is the reluctant hero, brundle is the monster. his ultimate plan culminates into fusing himself, veronica, and the baby into one being (a “perfect family”), removing veronica’s agency forever, along with setting up the kind of body horror i really don’t care to imagine. yuck. stathis comes in to stop him with a shotgun, and gets his hand and foot dissolved by acid for his trouble. despite that, he still has the presence of mind to shoot at the telepod with his one remaining hand, freeing veronica (his best scene, imo, but maybe i’m biased) and luring brundlefly out of his own telepod... where he gets further warped by the machine of his own creation, and comes out a horrific, bloody mess, warped together with the machine and begging for his own death. veronica grants his last request. role the credits.

so, what? what’s the takeaway with this movie? it must go beyond “flies are evil and if you merge with them you’ll become that too.” the fact is, the worst parts of brundlefly don’t come from the fly at all, but from seth. his inability to acknowledge veronica’s “no,” his jealousy; all of these come from seth’s humanity. they’re heightened, perhaps, when combined with the mindless creature concerned only with its own survival, but ultimately, the fault is his own. it would be easy, perhaps too easy, to say that the movie functions as a warning against the evils of technology. personally, i think that such a reading is bullshit. over and over, it’s drilled into our heads that computers are stupid. they only do what we tell them. yes, seth’s transformation was heralded by a mistake in the machine, but such a mistake was only possible because of his spiteful, stupid decision to get into the telepod without checking all variables in the first place. i think it’s more of a warning against hubris, if anything. the fly shows us a man with an idea that could change the world, and a disposition that makes us wonder if he’s really ready to. it’s a tragedy, what happens to brundle. but he’s hoisted by his own petard. 

#the fly #jeff goldblum #text post #seth brundle #veronica quaife #stathis borans #went this whole rant without saying anything about the 'cheeseburger' scene #smh #well. here's me signing off. #until next time..... think of me and know that i'm out there stanning nasty ugly men #peace

[riverboundao3ff]

Riverbound, Chapter 5

You are THE GUARDIAN, and you are currently munching on the most delicious bowl of grubflakes to have ever existed.

You have seen many things over the course of your travels, met all kinds of people and befriended them, been to places most could never even dream of. Space, time, and an entire universe have surrendered to your whim. The heart of an eldritch sun flowed through your veins not too long ago, and you through it.

And yet, you have still to encounter anything as satisfying as a good breakfast.

Yesterday was mostly spent sleeping, only waking up to eat a couple of times and talk to Daraya and her friends. Bronya had also brought Karako with her when she came to check in on you, which had been the highlight of your night. Like Wanshi, he had noticeably grown, and now had a couple of inches on you. There was a new depth to his gaze that had come with the passage of time. He almost looked like that… entity you and Feferi spoke to at her palace.

It was a little unnerving at first, but it had soon become apparent that this boy was still the same young clown you nearly threw hands with seadwellers for. He was still Karako.

That much was obvious as you watch him and Wanshi plot out the next chapter of her Soldier Purrbeasts fanfiction, with Wanshi arguing that Lionstar of ShadeCaste needs to be killed off and Karako drawing out Lionstar eating a bunch of other purrbeasts. It’s very detailed and anatomically correct. You wonder how Bronya even let those books into the caverns, and then you remember reading Warriors as a kid on Earth. Those cute illustrations of cats running around in the woods on all of the covers did a great job of hiding the gorefest that raged within.

Sitting next to you on the couch is Daraya, typing away furiously on her palmhusk, and Lanque, who is trying to judge how well your ribs are healing by poking your side.

You dodge another perfectly manicured claw in time to see Daraya receive another text from Tyzias, saying that she and the others would be at the bottom of the mountain in an hour or so. “Tell her I said hi!”

“You’ll see her pretty soon,” Daraya says, a little confused.

“Yeah, but I’m excited-ow! Lanque, quit it!”

“I’m feeling for the break.”

“You’re gonna be feeling my fist up your flat ass if you don’t stop.”

“They said a bad word!” Wanshi yells.

You freeze. Your mind races for a solution that doesn’t involve Bronya reaming you out for cussing in front of the kids. “If you don’t tattle on me you can say a bad word too.”

Her big black eyes widen. “Really?”

“Really.”

“‘Cause Lanque taught me a really good one!”

“I taught you nothing of the sort, young lady,” Lanque growls, slapping a hand over your mouth to shut you up. You contemplate licking it just to see how he would react. Better yet, you could throw your empty bowl at his head and see how thick troll skulls really are.

Wanshi takes control of the situation by hopping up to you and leaning into your ear. “Lususfucker.”

You squeal into Lanque’s palm, and Daraya’s jaw drops. Even Karako looks impressed.

“Wanshi Adyata!” Lanque scolds, but the corners of his eyes lift in such a way that tells you he’s not actually angry. You wiggle out of his grasp and stand, taking a couple of slow breaths to test the pain. It’s still sore AF in there, but as long as you take it easy you’ll be fine. You’ve had a lot worse for a lot longer.

Taking your bowl and putting in the sink by the bathroom, you turn to your friends and do your best impression of having your shit together. “Alright, so I know it’s only like a fifteen minute walk down to the bottom of the mountain, but I’m crippled so I say we head out early.”

“Bronya won’t be here to pick up Wanshi and Karako for an hour,” Lanque says, tapping the armrest he’s leaning on.

“They could come with us. Tyzias is bringing Tirona, she’s around their age,” Daraya points out.

“Won’t Bronya be mad?” you ask warily. The last thing you want to do is drag her student and her adopted clown son into a possible Situation™. It’s not like you’re going out tonight looking for trouble, but this is Alternia.

Lanque considers it, and then leaps to his feet with a smirk. “Nah. I’ll be coming with you guys, and I’ve taken the children out plenty of times.”

“Bronya didn’t-” Daraya begins to say, huffing in amusement, but Lanque cuts her off with a dramatic twirl of his suit jacket that slaps her in the face with a perfectly pressed sleeve.

“Daraya, dear, if I don’t get out of these godforsaken caves soon I might actually lose my mind. Wanshi, Karako! Come, we’re going on an adventure.”

You watch with a smile as the kids look up with sparkling eyes and instantly abandon their project to scramble over to Lanque. Daraya glares up at the older jade, nose still scrunched up from being smacked, but finally heaves herself upright to follow. You join her as the five of you head out the door and bump your shoulder against hers. She must have grown a little as well, because the top of your head now barely reaches her jawline.

The stairs are kind of a bitch, but you persevere long enough to get to the main level of the caverns. Your ribs are throwing a Karkat-worthy bitchfit, though, so when Lanque halts the group at the end of the corridor for some reason you don’t complain.

“What?” Daraya mutters, impatient.

“Hush. Just because we can leave the caverns doesn’t mean we’re supposed to, and Bronya is supervising tonight’s shift. Do you want to explain to her who we’re going to meet?” he shoots back.

There’s something in his voice that tells you there’s more to this than either of them are letting on. You want to ask them what’s up, but even Wanshi and Karako are silent, so you keep your mouth shut and trot after Lanque. Teleporting is sounding more and more appealing by the second, but you know you’re still a little high from the painkillers Lynera gave you before she left for work. You learned the hard way that teleporting while drunk/high/otherwise incapacitated is a bad idea, like the time when you and Lanque had to ditch a party because the drones showed up and you, in a panic, zapped the both of you right into a river outside of Thrashthrust. That was the night you also discovered that landdwelling trolls are notoriously poor swimmers.

The next twenty minutes are spent dodging from building to building like you’re a group of spies trying to escape the government. It’s fun at first, but when Daraya has to yank you down behind a garbage bin to avoid being seen by a group of girls on their way to class, you wonder how often these trolls have to resort to sneaking around just for a glimpse of freedom. How many jades had never even had a friend that wasn’t of their own caste? How many haven’t seen the stars in the night sky, felt the wind in their hair, had the opportunity to pursue something they chose for themselves instead of being thrown into a life entirely dedicated to others?

Kids raising kids. That’s what this is.

The world outside of the caverns is cruel, devoid of justice and mercy for even those whose blood ran cold in their veins. But when you look at it, really look, the caverns aren’t much better. It’s a prison with bioluminescent cells.

You focus on keeping up with Daraya so you don’t get even more pissed off than you already are. Being angry would have to wait. Right now, you’re going to meet your friends.

… This isn’t the way to the main entrance, though? Where are you guys going?

Lanque answers your question by leading the way down an offshoot behind what you think is a storage unit. No more fungi grows to light the way, so you simply trust him to know where to go. There aren't many other options. In less than a minute it’s pitch black and strangely damp, and the temperature has dropped far enough to make you wish you’d brought that nice jacket Vriska gave you.

“This is how I get out,” Lanque whispers. You hear his footsteps stop, so you stop as well. “It’s a bit of a climb, but it’s the fastest way to the surface besides the main entrance.”

Your heart sinks at the word climb. Also, you can’t see balls. “I’m assuming there’s another tunnel? I'm as good as blind down here.”

“You seriously can’t see? How is your species still alive?” Lanque chuckles.

“Because we’re diurnal, pretty boy. We do our business with the light of our nice, not-lethal sun shining down on our backs. And just because I can’t see doesn’t mean I can’t do anything.” To prove your point, you take a careful step forward and feel for the walls of the tunnel. It’s narrow, and you can already feel the rock sloping up to the surface.

How the hell does Terezi do this?

You feel the challenging spark of Lanque’s gaze on the back of your neck. Nice Boy hours were over, it seemed. Time to return to the regularly scheduled programming of roasting each other until he let you in behind those meticulously maintained emotional walls for a moment or two, or you doing something especially stupid to spite him.

With one foot in front of the other, you lead the way into the darkness.

Fifty steps in and you can tell that if you hadn’t taken the painkillers earlier you’d be on the ground crying. One hundred steps in you trip and almost eat shit. One-hundred and fifty steps, Lanque is right up in your business, trying to make you go faster.

Keyword being trying. You wait until he’s got one foot up on the rock slab you’re standing on and pretend to trip again. He grunts and grabs the walls for support as you slam back into him, using the weight of your frankly magnificent ass to knock him off balance.

“My bad, sorry,” you tell the blackness.

“Do I need to carry you? Because I will carry you. Like a little wiggler.”

“No, thank you. You can wait for the poor injured alien without self-combusting for a little while longer. Unless… Daraya? Kids? How are you guys holding up?” you call back.

“We’re good! Take all the time you need!” Wanshi announces, giggling.

“Yeah, dude. Don’t push yourself,” Daraya adds.

“Honk!”

Lanque growls, and you grin.

Luckily, he doesn’t have the time to come up with a plan for revenge when Wanshi yells that she can see the end. You can’t see anything for another half-minute or so, but when you do you, moonlight illuminates the bend in the tunnel you’re rounding like a searchlight. The slope flattens out, much to the relief of your aching legs.

The secret exit leads out underneath some huge tree you have no name for, shielded from sight by a thick layer of roots that twist all over the place. You squeeze through an opening in the mess and hop aside to let Wanshi and Karako through. Lanque hauls himself up and over through a bigger hole above you, and Daraya does the same.

You take a moment to suck in fresh air. The trolls come to stand beside you, and together you all look out towards Thrashthrust. Two moons hang low in the sky, lighting up the planet below in shades of pink and green.

It’s beautiful, but you know the kinds of danger that beauty can hide.

Karako is the first one to hop off the ledge, with Wanshi close behind. You opt to carefully shimmy down as far as you can before sliding to the forest floor. You’re left breathless nonetheless as the impact sends stabs of pain through your torso, but you shake it off and follow the kids. Daraya and Lanque come up on either side of you to lend you support.

“I’m fine, guys, really,” you protest.

“I saw that flinch,” Daraya mutters. “Besides, if we show up with you limping all over the place the teals will have my ass.”

“You just want to impress Tyzias,” Lanque snickers.

Daraya hisses like a feral cat, and you turn to her, interest peaked. “Wait. You and Tyzias?”

“No! We’re just friends!” she snarls, swatting at Lanque.

Lanque has a knowing grin on his face, though, and he wraps an arm around your waist to lean down to your level. “They’re so pale it’s disgusting.”

You look back to a green-faced Daraya and wiggle your eyebrows. Daraya gives you and Lanque the finger and stomps ahead to catch up with the kids.

“We gotta set them up,” you tell Lanque. “How far along are they?”

“Oh, you’ll see.”

You want to demand more information than that, but then Wanshi calls out a greeting from ahead. Somebody farther down the path answers.

“What’s with you and good timing?” you ask, your heart rising to your throat. Despite your ribs you quicken the pace, and when you don’t feel like you’re going to pass out you break into a jog.

“Oh, so now you want to hurry it up?” Lanque snarks, but right now you’re more interested in seeing your friends again than coming up with a good comeback.

You follow the path as it turns, and boom, there they are.

Karako, Wanshi, and Tirona are all saying hi and introducing themselves, Daraya and Tyzias are hugging each other (Oh, worm?), and Stelsa and Tagora are standing back like proud parents, even if good old Gor-Gor looks a bit scandalized by all the pale stuff going on.

It’s Stelsa who sees you first. Her hands fly up to cover her mouth and she squeals in delight. Tagora jumps at the noise and turns to see what she’s looking at before breaking out in the biggest smile you’ve ever seen on him, not the customer-service smile that’s all fangs but with his eyes as well.

You manage to haul your crippled ass over to them in time for Tyzias to pull away from Daraya, spot you, and pull you into a desperate but careful embrace. Daraya must have told her about your injuries, which is great because you don’t think you would have survived a whole gang of teals jumping on you all at once.

“I’m so glad you’re okay,” she croaks. “Fuck, we searched everywhere for you but you were gone and I thought you died somewhere all alone-”

You squeeze her tighter. “Hey, hey. I’m alive. I’m back.”

She sniffles and pulls back in time for Stelsa to wrap up the two of you in her ridiculously buff arms. Not for the first time, you can’t believe how much your friends missed you. It makes you feel so whole to know that you have so many people who care about you, and at the same time you’re crushed with the guilt of knowing that they all thought you were dead. Damn.

“Please, people, not in front of the children,” you hear Tagora complain, but his voice is a little thicker with emotion than you remember it being. You turn and stick your tongue out at him.

“What about me?” A frantic hand smacks your arm. “Hello? Gimme a hug, alien!”

“Hi, Tirona,” you laugh, reaching out behind you to bring her into the group. She squeaks in protest before letting it happen.

“Better,” she mumbles into your hoodie. You graciously pretend you don’t see her using it to wipe away a stray tear.

“Daraya told us everything and I could hardly believe it, it all sounds so… it sounds too much,” Stelsa says, wrapping her arms around herself. “Before all of this the world was so much smaller, and now you’re back because you escaped from a bunch of gods!”

“That’s the gist of it, yeah,” you agree.

Tagora pats your shoulder, which you know is his version of a hug. “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. We’re just glad to have you back in one piece.”

Doc Scratch’s calm voice agrees somewhere in the back of your memories, overlaid by Dirk’s- no, not the goofy, lonely young boy you helped feel cared for, the other one-! “Thanks, Gor-Gor. I’m glad to be back, too.”

“Well, there is one thing I hope you’re willing to share,” Tyzias begins hesitantly. “Daraya said something about you being able to do some… interesting stuff. For… ah, screw it. We all know why we’re here.”

You meet her sharp, tired eyes. “What’s that?”

“We’re rebels.”

All of the trolls turn to glare at Lanque.

The tall jadeblood just shrugs and shoves his hands in his pockets. “What? It needs saying. Words are powerful, you know.”

“Yes they are, Bombyx, which is why you need to be more careful with them,” Tyzias drones.

“I can’t believe you guys are dragging me into this,” Tirona whines.

Tagora gives her a withering look. “Hey, you wanted to come, kid.”

“Yeah, ‘cause I wanted to see my friend-!”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!” You throw your hands out in a hold up motion. Your mind frantically replays what the fuck just happened. “You guys are saying that all of you are rebels?”

“Don’t say it out loud!” Tirona stage-whispers, ears flattening against her head.

Daraya sighs and comes up to pat your shoulder. “It’s a long story.”

“I’ve got time.”

She and Tyzias look at each other, seemingly come to a silent agreement, and then look back to you.

“You might wanna sit down for this,” says Tyzias.

#homestuck #hiveswap #Hiveswap Friendsim trolls #riverbound #c5 #jadebloods #teals #yayyy! #The Guardian #MSPA reader #pesterquest

[wordstrings]

Inbox dump 

(brace yourselves, I’m including the timestamps because these have been sitting forever and you may literally forget ever having sent one of these because they’re from so long ago 😬)

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Anonymous said: March 11th 2014 *Clears throat* Non-canon verse, uni AU probably *strums guitar and takes a deep breath* DUEEEEE TO A COMPUTING errORRR, dean and gabe are stuck as roomatesssssssss, whilesamandcascanbestucktogethertoo that'snotaneccesitybutitwouldbegreaaaaaaaaattttttttt, and veeery soon it turns into something of a friendship BUT THEEEENNNN dean fights with saaAAAM and gabe is like "dude stop being so upset" aND FLUFF HAPPEeeeeeEEEEEEeens! *stands up and bows* tyvm for accepting debriel though like omg <3

I’ve been rewatching some of Supernatural seasons 5 and 6 this past weekend, and it reminded me how much I love and miss Gabriel. I still maintain that Debriel is a super-underrated ship. The manic-chaos potential is *muah*. (see: #Debriel)

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Anonymous said: August 7th 2018 psst... light back tickles while cuddling in bed are pure™ and wholesome™

Good shit good shit good shit

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Anonymous said: September 19th 2018 I love science and go to public seminars as often as I can. I walked in to the most recent one (which I had picked at random), and it was on the science of tickling. There were demonstrations. There were hand gestures and finger wiggling. There were in depth descriptions of the anatomy and physiology behind ticklish spots. It was legitimately your Amateur Production’s fic, and I was Kevin. Worst of all it was 2 hours long. I think I died during it and my soul was sucked into hell.

Uhhhhhh where can I get a copy of the slide deck?? Asking for a friend. (see: #series: Amateur Production)

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Anonymous said: September 23rd 2018 your art skills have me shook in the best possible way

aaaahh thank you! Fun fact: I went to art school and even took illustration as a concentration area but I’ve hardly drawn anything for like ten years. When I do draw, it’s usually because there are feelings that I don’t wanna do words about. (see: #strings does art)

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Halo!anon said: September 27th 2018 A small, sinful part of Castiel had the urge to gloat. It was somewhat dampened by the fact that Dean was still under the impression that being abducted is peak romance."I can't believe you went out of your way to set up our second date!" He'd squealed, as Castiel tightened his restraints. - little excerpt of a sequel to Date Nights with Demons i had planned for months but abandoned. halo!anon

Your demented version of Demon!Dean is so entertaining 😄 (see: Date Nights with Demons)

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Anonymous said: November 6th 2018 Aaaaah your Gabriel / Kali drabble was adorable, I can't help but love seeing our mighty archangel reduced to a mass of giggles, and you write Gabriel so so well <3. I love your writing your stories always brighten my day ^^

It’s so rare for him to let his guard down, isn’t it? But when he does, he has a grand old time of it. :) (see: this drabble)

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sarah-lou-who said: November 8th 2018 1/4 Boo! The ghost of my online presence in the community is peeking its head in because I need help. I don’t have a platform or following to sound an alarm, so I’m using my platonic tumblr wife’s platform and following for me, because that’s what platonic tumblr wives do. Right? Anyway, I’m very actively fixated on Attack on Titan atm. You know this very well. You also know my predicament. I seem to have exhausted the entire supply of tickly AoT content I’m interested in that exists currently. 2/4 So, if you’re willing to publish these for me, I’m crying out into the vast TFB lands hoping that there’s someone out there to answer the call. I am in desperate need of tickly AoT content. I don’t know if anyone around here writes for it much these days. I haven’t found anyone. And I know beggars can’t be choosers, but it can’t be helped; I really only care if Eren is involved. Even better would be Levi, but I haven’t found ANYTHING involving him, so I feel like asking for that is futile. 3/4 I digress. Even after all this time I can’t keep my asks less than 50 parts long. So my goal here is that someone, somewhere, will by chance come across these, and be able and willing to either write fic of the tickly variety for Eren and/or Levi from Attack on Titan, or direct me to someone who can, if they know a person who knows a person who knows a person. (Sidenote, hi anyone who still remembers me! It’s Sarah, the more ticklish half of Leerah. I’m doing good and I miss you!) 4/4 (I hope you’re all doing well!) Thank you for letting me take advantage of your devoted followers, Strings! Love yaaa!!!

Ah, my platonic tumblr wife Sarah returns! (Digitally, anyway. Reality-wise, we hang out all the time and it’s probably very rude of me to have not published this ask for so long!) I keep teasing her that she has a Type, and that is dark-haired sulky badass who’d probably make a wicked ‘ler – AoT Levi, SPN Cas, FMA Roy, etc. So anyway, if anyone knows of somewhere I can point her to find the content she’s (still) craving, lmk!

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Anonymous said: October 23rd 2019 I’m sorry if this is invasive in any way, but how is Sarah doing? I’ve been absent from Tumblr for a couple years and I see that her blog is now deactivated. I was just wondering if she’s doing alright and if she’s still around here on a different blog maybe?

See above! She doesn’t have a TFB community blog anymore, but she’s doing well. We’re quarantine buddies and helping each other out a lot. Very kind of you to ask! <3

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Anonymous said: December 2nd 2018 Hi, sorry to bother you but do you know what happened to prodigal-anon’s blog? It seems to have been deleted. Sorry again if you’ve been asked this before

No worries, friend! Here’s an answer for you!

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Anonymous said: December 13th 2018 I LOVE THE LOOPY SERIES! I love it so much, is there any chance you’ll be doing a part four? I’d give anything to see Cas and Dean tickle each other, it would be so cute 😍

Despite all evidence to the contrary, I haven’t entirely stopped writing... and Loopy 4 is one of those unfinished pieces that has seen a few additions lately. :) I’ve learned not to make promises about when something might get finished and posted, but I genuinely do believe this may be one of the first things that shows up once I’m ‘back in the game.’ Stay tuned... (see: #series: Loopy)

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Anonymous said: January 1st 2019 No no no you can't just stop there! I need more fluffy destiel with tickles and kissing! Pretty please?

I believe this is in response to Wonder whose arms will hold you good and tight. Don’t you worry, anon – Dean and Cas are not done being fluffy on this blog!

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1832wasalongtimeago said: January 25th 2019 Hi I just wanted to pop in and say the Maintenance series is amazing!! The second part was doing things to my poor heart I’ve read it like 5 times already. You’re such an amazing writer and thank you fo writing for us!

I’m very flattered, but I can’t take credit for the Of Maintenance series – that’s the lovely work of ask-flip-frost! It does things to my poor heart, too, so you’re in good company. :)

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Anonymous said: January 26th 2019 Sam Winchester can take a lot of things. The one thing he CAN'T take? Someone using baby talk on him when he's being tickled. He collapses into a puddle of helpless giggles faster than a house of cards in a stiff wind.

Precious Sammy just needs to laugh and be held, doesn’t he? <3

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Anonymous said: May 17th 2019 Thor needs tickles. So. Damn. Much.

Oh this was from right after Endgame came out. Thor did make me feel some sads there. :( Poor bab.

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Anonymous said: July 25th 2019 hi! i’ve read your wonderful fics forever but i’ve never really sent anything like this before so i don’t really know what to say.. but i had a destiel tickly thought and really wanted to share it with somebody, so here goes i guess- dean is taking too long in the shower so cas decides to use his mojo from the other room to speed things along. and listens to dean’s echoey laughs through the door. that’s all. sorry if this is weird! okay bye have a good one

This is not weird and I may have delayed in telling you any of my feelings about it but I definitely have a doc somewhere that has some vague notes about how I’d like to write this because I like it!

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Anonymous said: August 6th 2019 Anhhgff your Good Omens tword fics are so cute snvfddf i never knew I needed that of my favorite husbands till now😳😍

I know, right?! They’re just dying to be dropped into every fluffy situation. (see: #Good Omens)

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Anonymous said: July 25th 2019 Poking my head in to say hello, hope you’re doing well still! I just got into Good Omens and I absolutely loved your fic! (I watched the show first because my book was taking too long in the mail lol) Also, the other week I somehow talked myself into making a tfb blog, after all these years of almost doing so before chickening out (this ask isn’t from it because I just hopped in here briefly in a private phone browser to say hi, it’s literally just august-anon though) ~August!Anon

August!anon, I’m always so happy to see you stop by! Tagging your (not-so-new anymore) blog so everyone can check you out: @august-anon​

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hey-teenblog said: August 4th 2019 I love your fanfiction very much! They give me a lot of pleasant emotions. And most importantly, they, saturated with tenderness and love, gave me to accept myself as lee!! sorry for my english, i'm russian Love you 😘❤️

I will never tire of hearing things like this! Thank you for telling me. “Saturated with tenderness and love” is a such wonderful compliment about my writing – thank you very much! No need to apologize for language differences; I’m always impressed with anyone who manages to pick up English because it’s bonkers. 

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Anonymous said: August 23rd 2019 Hi! Just found this blog and wondering some basic info. ** What fandoms do toy write for? ** Do you accept prompts? ** Do you write reader insert fics? Thank you lovley ❤️

Anonymous said: August 29th 2019 Do you write tickle fics for bnha?? Asking for a friend 👀👀

The only fandoms I have reliably been able to write for are Supernatural and Good Omens – but even Good Omens is a rookie player here. Supernatural is my main jam, and Destiel is my favorite flavor. I don’t do reader inserts, but I’m always “accepting” prompts. I just haven’t written many of them for quite a long time now, so you’re welcome to drop them as long as you’re okay with them collecting dust. (see: this selfsame post)

My About/FAQ page is very dusty right now, too, but there might be some useful tidbits in there for you.

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Anonymous said: November 12th 2019 okayokayokay. Have you watched Lucifer? It's on netflix, it's great, so much emotions and pining. (Also, y'know, reg. Luci stuff. He runs a club. Bad jokes. It's great.)

I haven’t, but it’s on my Netflix watchlist, so I’ll get there eventually! I saw a gifset once where he actually did the thing I see in winged fanfic all the time, where there was gunfire and he sheltered someone he cared about with his manifested wings. And honestly, that was the deciding factor for me.

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Anonymous said: November 16th 2019 Oh Man U listen to Critrole as well! Nice! Campaign 1 was awesome but also heartfelt and really gut-punching at points. Who is your fav so far, anyone you aren’t fond of? (& Out of interest do you have any tickle related thoughts on the main crew or upcoming Fics we can look out for? As you said it’s tumbleweeds out here for this fandom’s tickles and I’ll take anything really 😂!) Hope u enjoy!!!!!

It’s STILL tumbleweeds out here and it’s making me crazy! My heart belongs to Vax primarily, Percy secondarily. I don’t really have cohesive thoughts or headcanons about anything, unfortunately. I do have this one mental picture that keeps coming up that I keep wanting to see art of (who knows, maybe I’ll commission somebody someday?) – of ridiculous brute Grog just lifting Vax straight up in his arms and gettin’ wiggly with his fingers while all Vax can do is laugh and pry and kick while absolutely nobody helps him.

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Regarding #series: Accessor:

Anonymous said: August 31st 2015 I would like to see accessor!verse cas using feathers on Dean!!! and NIBBLES and RASPBERRIES and TEETH and TONGUE and WOWWWWWW

ME TOO, FRIEND. It’s been aaaaages since I published anything new for the Accessor AU, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t been going back to my unfinished docs every once in a while to add a few lines here and there. ;) 

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Anonymous said: October 29th 2016 Prompt: Cas is put in charge of getting a treaty with a neighboring country that shares a lot of the same customs, including Accessories, with certain... twists (think Bracelets AU) and treats their personal slaves (like Accessories) like people (listening to opinions, giving proper care, etc.). The foreign diplomats keep bringing that up and talking to Dean. Cas isn't sure he can make it though the diplomatic proceedings. Also, he might be having improper thoughts about that custom and Dean...

I’m posting this here, but I’m definitely keeping this filed elsewhere because it’s FANTASTIC.

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Halo!anon submitted: June 4th 2018 I can’t help but imagine how tickling must play a part in other aspects of society in the accessor ‘verse, besides the sessions between master and accessory. So here’s some imagines and headcanons, with a touch of worldbuilding. (Warnings, besides the usual for this AU: death mention, reference to past trauma.)

- Among the high class, during parties and other celebrations, it’s seen as a common courtesy to string up one’s personal accessory in the center of the room and let the guests entertain themselves with them. Lord Castiel never does this with Dean, much to his fellow nobles’ disappointment; the mere suggestion had Dean quaking as things he’d rather forget came back to bite him.

- Every so often, a petty criminal(the poor man’s accessory, if you will) is placed in stocks in a small town’s square and left at the mercy of the very people they used to menace. What happens next usually involves honey, some sheep, and plenty of begging. A guard stands by to warn people, “No hurting, only tickling. Everyone please wait your turn, they’re not going anywhere any time soon.”

- Certain monastic healers perform tickle therapy as a treatment for anxiety, stress, and other “diseases of the soul”, as they call them. Balthazar himself proposed the idea, because of course he did. The rich usually indulge in this kind of therapy secretly, due to its undignified nature. Some contemplate the possibility of training accessories to tickle in the future, but it’s still a big taboo.

- Every town has a folktale about a tickle monster. Curiously, many of them involve controlling plants and attacking through dreams. The southern communities still have a giggle remembering that one time six years ago when Michael offered to hunt down one such monster and came back with Crowley, a sleazy drunkard with a fetish and a dream, sitting in a cage and wearing a mask.

- The Masters sisters, Lillith, Meg and Ruby, have a long history with law enforcement. Their favorite pastime is snatching unlucky merchants off the roads and tickling them into coughing up everything they have. Everyone is sure they had a hand in Fergus"Crowley" Macleod’s untimely demise by ferocious attack hounds, but they’re very good at covering their tracks. They’ll help you cover up your tracks too, if you’re a friend- ask Bela Talbot.

I might make a second part if I get any more ideas. I hope you enjoyed this! -Halo!anon.

I am very fond of you indeed, Halo!anon. These are so creative!

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hypahticklish submitted: July 24th 2018 Accessor!Ideas:

~ Gabriel leads a furious rant regarding Prince Lucifer/Sam to Castiel, relating back to perhaps dealings he has directly had with the Prince between their two unstable-yet-truced Kingdoms. Castiel relates with similar views shared by Gehenna’s councilor(s).

~ Dean and Sam BM where the audience learns more about their homevillage. Dean starts it after a rather morose remark from Sam and ends with Sammy smiling and stealing my heart.

~ Balthazar helps Sam in several ways: 1) Learns the Sam was originally a psuedo-Advocates apprentice, as well as herbalist nephew when Sam identifies the components to some salves/medicines he’s making (he had been explaining what he was doing in an attempt to spare himself being attacked like the first couple times) 2) Calls Sam out on being intelligent and making a recklessly stupid choice by selling himself to find Dean. 3) Removes Lucifers mark. And maybe perhaps: 4) Allows Sam to assist in his own healing/medicine making under his careful observation, feigned as needing two sets of hands to do correctly and his assistant was running an errand, to assess his skills. 5) Offer he work in the hospice under him, apprenticing, should Gabriel allow his intelligence not go to waste. It’s not what Sam really wants to do/learn, but it’s better than doing nothing.

~Dean officially thanks Castiel for saving Sam. I’m talking full feels, single man tear sorta thing. And Castiel says “there was never another option” and then its schmoopy sweet with the kisses and the tickles and the Cas saying he loves Dean back!!!!!!!! swoon.

~ Kali!Likes!Sam’s!Spirit! Give me a dinner scene with Gabriel, Kali and Sam where hes holding his own in a diplomatic conversation with them when he nearly crosses a line (maybe something classist? Making it clear that Cas and Gabe are the exception to his experiences) and she says “I like this ones fire. He reminds me of you, my love.” *grabby hands*

~ Prince Lucifer sends a message to Gabriel requesting (threatening) his Helpmate be returned to him for a handsome reward. Sam somehow sees letter and gets spooked because DRAMA. Gabriel responds to Lucifer with the Chief Advocate equivalent of “Fuck Off”

You, my friend. YOU. All these feelings about Sam? Top-notch, and I shall be borrowing them, yes I shall.

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Regarding #android!Cas:

hypahticklish said: January 23rd 2016 Android!Cas deciding today is the DAY. Dean has been teasing him lately that he likes these strange sensations that have him using all his back-up generated power to not accidentally break Dean's bones and challenging him with that cocky smirk and relaxed confidence. Android!Cas practicing during time while Dean rests with holding objects with similar density to the human wrists with enough gentle force that they neither fracture or slip from his grasp. Android!Cas surprising Dean by turning the tables and pinning his wrists over his head while settling himself on Dean's thighs. Android!Cas not necessarily tickling at first so much as just touching like he had been wanting to so as to catalog how his best friend feels with his new technology. Android!Cas feeling that bubble of FEELS in his chest as he listens to Dean swear at him with positive physical actions negating his harsh words, growing more amused as the bubbling giggles begin. I love Android!Cas 

Anonymous said: January 23rd 2016 Android!Cas figures out his own strength comes in handy for more than just retaining himself during tickle fights. When he surprises Dean, Dean tends to squirm and fight back a little (even though he told Cas to get him back as part of the experience), so Cas uses his strength to gently hold Dean down while ticking him. Dean's never been held immobile before so it's a new experience for him, but he ends up liking it. Cas notices how Dean relaxes into his hold after a minute or so. Cas doesn't fail to use this knowledge about Dean, coming up with teasing words and methods of ticking to make Dean all squirmy and giggly, taking special notice of how light tickles effect Dean even more than most other touches, using that specially designed soft brush meant to gently clean Cas' delicate computer chips.

Anonymous said: February 17th 2016 I'm joining in on the Android!Cas thing, if not too late. Perhaps Android!Cas has detachable parts, like a foot, and Dean is a jerk and runs off and hides with it all the while tickling it and making fun of Android!Cas's increasingly desperate attempts to get it back.

Y’all, careful deliberate curious determined ‘ler Cas is LIFE. And, reserved confused helpless adorable ‘lee Cas is also life. Detachable and extensible parts are probably key to both of these things.

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Regarding current personal circumstances:

Anonymous said: January 14th 2020 I pray that you’re able to find peace during this difficult time. You are loved more than you will ever know. I know it’s hard to believe, but there will come a time that you are thankful for this experience, because it will have turned you into the person you are truly meant to be. Be strong and be hopeful. Keep your faith and keep knowing that you are going to be okay. Don’t let this dark time destroy the magnificent light inside of you. Sending you so much love

Anonymous said: January 17th 2020 I’m so sorry you’re struggling. Hang in there! We’re all here for you!

Anonymous said: February 11th 2020 all my love, thoughts and prayers are going towards you right now. also wanted to just drop a little thank you note in your inbox for all the light and joy i've found in your fics over the years. im sitting half way through my first year at uni currently but ive been a fan of yours since early highschool and i feel like ive almost grown up with your writing and fanfics in a strange way, so thank you so much for that. sending all my love to you once again- you are so strong x

I love you all so much.

#blog maintenance #ask #you people are too kind #prompt #Accessor 'verse #android!Cas

[pinelife3]

What Women Think Men Think

In the 2000 film What Women Want, Mel Gibson accidentally electrocutes himself with a hairdryer in the bathtub which for some reason gives him the ability to hear women’s thoughts. This comes at a great time for him personally and professionally as it allows him to perform well in his job as an advertising exec, woo the lovely Helen Hunt, and bond with his estranged daughter.

Sadly, the genius of What Women Want was not recognised by critics in its time and the film received poor reviews - however, it did perform well commercially, making it a great candidate for a gender-flip remake. Our prayers were answered earlier this year with What Men Want, in which Taraji P. Henson plays a sports agent who misses out on a promotion because she doesn’t get men. Surprising no one, What Men Want received worse reviews than the original, but managed to one-up it by also being a commercial disappointment.  I haven’t seen it (I hear it is genuinely unwatchable) but from Wikipedia I gather that she drinks some magic tea and then can hear men’s thoughts which... makes her good in bed but doesn’t lead to as much professional success as you might expect. While What Women Want, directed by the great Nancy Meyers, is about a chauvinist learning to respect women, What Men Want is about a woman learning that most men suck and that they don’t deserve respect so it’s better not to work for them. What Men Want was directed by a man which, if you ask me, seems kind of pandering: why would a man make a film about how cartoonishly awful men are?

The rough premise of both What X Want films is that when the protagonist has access to the inner thoughts of the opposite sex, what they hear is revelatory: the opposite sex is apparently unknowable, inscrutable, vastly foreign. It requires magic (or bathtub electrocution) to know what others really think. Ha! Well, I have that magic. A portal to another world. A world where men, unobserved, unfettered by social barriers, freely say whatever they really think of any idea, image or product you present to them: Reddit.

I’ve often complained to Matt that practically any post on Reddit which features a young and/or attractive female woman girl will draw comments from men saying that they’re going to jerk off to the picture. Why do you think we care that you’re going to mash your genitals while watching this gif of a girl in a bikini using a homemade water slide? Why did my eyes and mind have to be subjected to this information about your plans for the afternoon? Did that first improbable spark of life, apes descending from trees, straightened spines, the birth of technology, everything our forebears strived for across eternity, really lead up to this moment where you wrote that on the internet? Why are we pack animals?

So the shtick of this blog post is: I sneak about on Reddit to find out want men want, what they care about, and think about. But! We ladies don’t care what they think about beer and barbecues (we already know that all men are practically BBQsexual, am I right?) so let’s identify a few things where we do care about what they think. 

For our purposes, I think women only care about men’s opinions on women - and possibly also sexual politics. For sports, most political issues, food, music, etc. I think we all agree that if you ask a man what he thinks, he’ll probably give you a pretty straight answer. The fantasy of knowing what men really want is that it’s information you would not normally have access to, because you’re too shy to ask, or you’re concerned his answer would be evasive or dishonest. Most people aren’t dishonest because they’re mean liars. They’re dishonest because they doesn’t want to hurt your feelings - or perhaps because they can’t be bothered to argue. So some of the impulse to eavesdrop on someone’s thinking is an insecurity, it’s suspecting they’ve withheld or softened an opinion - and wanting to know the full truth even if it’s hurtful. 

In particular (and mostly because I want to talk to someone about these books), I’m going to pick ideas from Sally Rooney’s novels to compare romantic men as written by a woman with the actuality of men on Reddit. Rooney writes love stories (or at least love-adjacent stories) which are widely read by women and have been enormously popular: this to me suggests that her idea of romantic men has resonated with many women and therefore it may be interesting to see if the interiority of the men she’s written could exist in the real world (or, at least on Reddit).

My methodology for trawling Reddit for relevant information is simple:

1. Is the attribute mentioned in Reddit’s NSFW directory? I don’t want to solely rely on the Reddit NSFW directory as a barometer for men’s interest in things, but I believe when trying to assess what men find attractive, this is a decent tool. I would venture to say that every (legal) niche interest is addressed by a NSFW subreddit: gamer girls, women in sundresses, redheads, anime princesses, cute girls, sexy girls, skinny girls, mums, teens, big boobs (attached to women with rich interiorities, I’m sure), mascara stained tears, and so on forever. Related to this: just because a subreddit exists to address a particular niche (e.g. braces), this doesn’t mean all men find that age group, attribute, body type, piece of clothing, etc. attractive - but it at least illustrates that someone found it attractive enough to create a community dedicated to it.

2. Is the attribute mentioned in any of Ask Reddit’s 'Men, what’s one unusual thing you find really attractive about women’ type threads? Men seem to sense that these threads are always started by women, so the responses are more romantic than sexual. Dudes tend to say the ‘unusual things’ they find attractive are freckles, when women can’t reach things on high shelves, messy up-dos, etc.

Question 1: Do men like the pale, non-sexy parts of women?

In Rooney’s second book Normal People, the male protagonist spends a lot of time looking at the female protagonist and admiring her pale delicacy.

You look really well, he says.

I know. It’s classic me. I came to college and got pretty.

He starts laughing. He doesn’t even want to laugh but something about the weird dynamic between them is making him do it. ‘Classic me’ is a very Marianne thing to say, a little self-mocking, and at the same time gesturing to some mutual understanding between them, an understanding that she is special. Her dress is cut low at the front, showing her pale collarbones like two white hyphens.

Later, he admires her pale lips and wrists: 

He hasn’t seen her in person since July, when she came home for her father’s Mass. Her lips look pale now and slightly chapped, and she has dark circles under her eyes. Although he takes pleasure in seeing her look good, he feels a special sympathy with her when she looks ill or her skin is bad, like when someone who’s usually very good at sports has a poor game. It makes her seem nicer somehow. She’s wearing a very elegant black blouse, her wrists look slender and white, and her hair is twisted back loosely at her neck. 

Women hope men think of them in this way: that men closely observe us and like what they see, that they can thrill romantically at non-sexy parts of our bodies like our under eye bags or bony elbows, that they’re so devoted they like us even when we’re sickly. Lolita has this to thank for its enduring popularity. Sure, Humbert Humbert is a broken man and a pedophile but he’s so lyrical:

I looked and looked at her, and I knew, as clearly as I know that I will die, that I loved her more than anything I had ever seen or imagined on earth. She was only the dead-leaf echo of the nymphet from long ago - but I loved her, this Lolita, pale and polluted and big with another man's child. She could fade and wither - I didn't care. I would still go mad with tenderness at the mere sight of her face.

Men want to be him, women want to be adoringly described by him. 

Anyway. Let’s check Reddit to see what men really think of pale wrists and collarbones - or if they think of them at all.

There are no communities in Reddit’s NSFW directory focused on wrists or collarbones or any bony protrusion through pale skin. There is a subreddit dedicated to NSFW content featuring pale girls with ~420,000 subscribers but the focus of this content is sexy areas of the body (enormous pale breasts, perfect pale butts, etc.) and there is not much coverage of pale wrists and/or collarbones.  

I also couldn’t find any references to pale non-sexy parts of women in any AskReddit threads related to things men find attractive about women. 

Conclusion: I do not believe that men as a cohort are particularly into dark under eye bags, bony chests, etc. These are just things women wish men liked about them.  

Question 2: Do men like damaged women?

In Rooney’s first novel, Conversations with Friends, the protagonist has the following conversation with her ~lover~ in bed:

I want you to hit me. I don’t think I want to do that, he said. I knew that he was sitting up now, looking down at me, though I kept my eyes closed. Some people like it, I said. You mean during sex? I didn’t realise you were interested in that kind of thing. I opened my eyes then. He was frowning.  Wait, are you okay? he said. Why are you crying? I’m not crying. Incidentally it turned out that I was crying. It was just something my eyes were doing while we were talking. He touched the side of my face where it was wet. I’m not crying, I said. Do you think I want to hurt you? ...  I don’t know, I said. I’m just telling you that you can.

In Normal People, the protagonists have a similar exchange during sex:

Will you hit me? she says. For a few seconds she hears nothing, not even his breath. No, he says. I don’t think I want that. Sorry. She says nothing. Is that okay? he asks. She still says nothing. Do you want to stop? he says. She nods her head. She feel his weigh lift off her. She feels empty again and suddenly chill. He sits on the bed and pulls the quilt over himself. She lies there face down, not moving, unable to think of any acceptable movement. Are you okay? he says. I’m sorry I didn’t want to do that, I just think it would be weird. I mean, not weird, but... I don’t know. I don’t think it would be a good idea.

in the context of these novels, this behaviour is a form of self-harm from women who hate themselves: even those I’m closest to want to take advantage of me, will do what they want with me, will hurt me if I let them. The perfect men, confused and innocent to this self-destructive behaviour, are concerned and decline the offer. The women interpret this as a form of sexual rejection but the reader knows this rejection is actually romantic. Could we really thrill over a man who agreed to beat her? No one talks about 50 Shades of Grey anymore but Mr Darcy lingers in the minds of mothers and BBC-watching daughters the world over. Rooney’s romantic leads are very nice men for not hitting the protagonist during sex. 

Importantly, while the offer of subservience and sexual violence is not an immediate aphrodisiac, it adds to the overall appeal of our lady protagonists as women who are soft, damaged, not easily available, but also deeply vulnerable. Bob Dylan muses, basically (she’s delicate and seem’s like veneer. Sidebar on that line: I heard it when I was 17 and was jealous because it’s so good. Turns out this line is hotly contested in places where people contest Dylan lyrics. One tribe thinks it’s: she’s delicate and seems like veneer. Another tribe thinks it’s: she’s delicate and seems like the mirror. The tribe which is 100% wrong thinks it’s: she’s delicate and seems like Vermeer.). 

These books both have this thread of college-aged women who hate themselves and want to be mistreated by their lovers, and lovers who are perfect and sensitive enough to like the control they have in the relationship, but not abuse it. My read on this is that women like to think that men like to save damaged women. Damaged meaning women who are clearly dealing with one or more of the following: 

Untreated mental health problems

Self-medication dependencies 

Daddy issues

Memories of growing up with violence/abuse/Teletubbies/war crimes/poverty

Heavy baggage from previous relationships

You know what I mean. So, let’s check Reddit to see what men think of damaged women. In the NSFW directory there are a number of BDSM subs, most of which are focused on women being dominated by men: women trussed up in elaborate rigs of ropes and straps, women being used in various ways, beaten, dominated. Most of these subs have between 100,000 - 200,000+ subscribers. This would indicate that there are a decent number of Reddit users who are interested in hurting their sexual partner. 

(DISCLAIMER: I don’t mean to kinkshame. ContraPoints (I think in this video) argued that while it’s fine to be into BDSM and enjoy being hurt or hurting someone else, it does suggest some things about you. BDSM isn’t just fun. No one wants to be tied up and beaten/pissed on for no reason. You want those things because it means something to you to be treated badly or to treat others badly. Liking BDSM doesn’t mean you’re damaged, but it might mean something adjacent to that.)

Furthermore, re: Reddit’s attitude to ‘damaged’ women, any time a guy on Reddit tells a ‘crazy ex’ story, someone from the 3 brain cells club will flop out an old cliché: don’t stick your dick in crazy. Men like to warn each other about damaged women. That cliché often attracts a popular counterpoint:  

Crazy chicks are good in bed! What a treat: there are perks to dating a damaged woman. More than anything, men on Reddit love acting like they know a lot about women and wild sex. A damaged, compliant woman is great for clocking up these experiences.

I think we can say that some men do indeed like damaged women. The impression you get from Reddit is that a lot of these men would take advantage of the vulnerable Rooney protagonists, but that’s the point even within the novels: the man could have said yes, could have hit her - which the reader wouldn’t find romantic because we know that on some subcutaneous level she didn’t really want to be treated that way. A lot of romance only reads as romantic because we’re aware of the unromantic alternative: what if Richard Gere had treated Julia Roberts the way most men treat prostitutes? What if Bob Dylan compared a beautiful, mysterious woman to the 17th century Dutch painter Vermeer? 

In the final act of What Women Want, Gibson loses the ability to hear women’s thoughts. The point the film makes is that he’s been so reformed by hearing women’s perspectives and relating to them as actual human beings, that he doesn’t need magic anymore to behave like a nice person. This is also because it would not be romantic to be in a relationship with a man who was eavesdropping on your inner monologue. If the relationship is real and working, then you don’t need psychic powers to anticipate how the other person is going to feel and respond to things. You can always just ask - and you’ll have to trust that the answer is honest. 

Bonus: more of that lovable scamp Mel Gibson:

#What Women Want #Nancy Myers #Mel Gibson #Helen Hunt #What Men Want #Reddit