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xalicitie · 1 year

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Aftermath — Wylan Van Eck (Angst)

Following Crooked Kingdom events, Wylan and Jesper are living together peacefully at the Van Eck mansion. Wylan’s father is behind bars, but after everything, Wylan finds himself more scarred than ever. After the pain gets unbearable, Wylan decided to reveal to Jesper why he really found himself in the slums of the Barrel.

I saw a fanfic like this on ao3, same plot with the whole Jesper finding out that Wylan’s father sent guards to kill his own son but I swear this is original I don’t even remember reading it. This is also like my first time writing angst and shit it’s so bittersweet to write it

I think I’m also gonna post this on ao3 I just made an acc so u might see it on there

Wylan didn’t think his life was real.

Living as a Van Eck had proved Wylan used to a chaotic lifestyle: intermittent abuse, most of the days being completely ignored by the people in his own house. Despite his newfound life as a rich man with the lover of his dreams, the years of Jan’s constant malicious words had caved a wound deep inside him, possibly beyond healing.

:readmore:

On the latter, Jesper was unshakeable. With all the money in the world, his debt paid off and able to roam a mansion of his own as much as he reckoned would satisfy him—the lack of gambling, however, had made him a little too jittery—Jesper didn’t really have a worry in life. At least, if he did, he feigned It’s nonexistence.

Jesper thought everything was over. For him it was, but for Wylan..it was terribly frustrating, but he couldn’t seem to move on from the past.

Wylan didn’t want to admit it to himself but, there in the dregs of his heart, he still cared about his father. He always had, despite every single cruel thing he’d deliberately done to his own son. Sending him to a prison didn’t sit well with him, not when he shared the same blood. Not when Wylan found himself still lingering to the time when Jan Van Eck was a father—truly too long ago that Wylan couldn’t cherish the scattered memories of the time, but there was an innate remembrance of the period. All Wylan really wanted, was his father to be accepting of his son again.

Hell, he should’ve moved on by now. For moments at a time, with Jesper—when they were sucked in a kiss, when Jesper would make a funny joke and everything in the past vanished for an impeccable moment. In music—his Kerch fingers running along the keys of the grand piano he never realized he missed so much, the sweet sound of his flute echoing in the garden. For moments at a time the past was cured.

Moments.

Wylan had read the newspaper one day and witnessed a large article with his father’s face front and center, describing the imprisonment of the once prestigious Van Eck. He went to the bathroom and cried like a child.

The ache got unbearable enough that eventually Wylan got the courage to have a talk with Jesper. He didn’t necessarily know the exact things he was going to tell him—which was quite odd, since Wylan usually planned things beforehand in case things went awry, but, as far as he knew, he was going to fill in Jesper with what he didn’t know.

“So.” Jesper placed his tea cup on the table side and climbed their queen sized bed, watching Wylan with anticipating eyes. “What is it you wanted to talk to me about?”

Wylan’s fingers were fidgeting fervently. He licked his top lip and inhaled a breath.

It’s going to be okay.

“I didn’t tell you everything.” He started, taking small steps toward the bed. “About my father.”

“I didn’t think he could do a lot worse than he’s already done.” Jesper said with a short chuckle, then cut his mirth off like the twig of a tree. He saw Wylan’s blue eyes gloss, and every bit of happiness, every exaggeration of it inside of him, vanished like the coin of a magic trick.

“Come here.” He offered, gesturing to the bed. Wylan nodded, a bare budge of his head, and climbed into the space beside his boyfriend.

Jesper cradled Wylan into a warm hug, watching him attentively. Wylan resisted every urge to dismiss all that was happening here.

“I..I didn’t run away.” His words were tentative and pithy. He could barely maintain eye contact with Jesper, but he tried. “One day, my father told me he was going to send me to a music school in Belendt. It was convincing enough; he put two chaperones on the boat with me. We were out on the shore, a distance away from the harbor of Ketterdam, when..”

Something caught his throat. His father’s guard, Prior’s, hands were suddenly tight against his neck. The distance from the harbor and the panic of that day were tangibly there, like he were living through it once again.

Then there was a warmth at his fingers. Jesper was taking his hand in his.

“Go on, Wy.” He urged with a soft tone. The memory was farther, less real now that Jesper was there, fingers intertwining with Wylan’s.

Wylan took in a breath. “I was never meant to get to Belendt. My father, he..wanted me dead before the ship could ever reach land.”

There was silence. Wylan had gone over such things too much for his own good, but it still hurt to relive it. Especially say it to someone.

“Saints, Wylan, I’m so sorry.”

Wylan was never really fond of sentiment, but something in the tone of Jesper’s voice made his throat taut, struck his face with a squirmy sensation. He knew tears were coming.

“I didn’t think I could hate your father more.” Wylan faced Jesper fully, allowing himself to be vulnerable. “I don’t think even prison deserves him.”

There was little humor there. Jesper’s voice had turned bitter.

He wanted to believe that. Wylan desired with every swell of his heart that he could hate his father. Thinking about it made the tears come quicker, and Wylan found himself swiping bitterly at the first tear that streamed down his face.

As his chest heaved in heavy waves, Wylan found his face cupped by Jesper’s hand, his lovely fingers thumbing his lightly damp cheek. The next tear came at the other cheek, and Wylan was suddenly fighting an avalanche from falling.

“I still love him.” Wylan said, and a little cry followed. “I want to hate him. After everything, why can’t I hate him?”

Wylan reeled at the weakness in his voice. He hated how pitiful he sounded. But Jesper’s loving, caring gaze made that feel irrelevant.

“He’s your father.”

It was, after everything, so simple. He would always love him, he would always long for what they once shared so long ago—a father-son bond, nothing more, nothing less.

Wylan curled into Jesper, weeping. Slowly, he unfurled the years of abuse he’d undergone, the words of his father’s that stung the most, the days he felt most alone and didn’t think he’d surmount to anything at all. And Jesper was there, the prize after all the hurt and the pain, the priceless sunset falling against the hills at the end of a long, tedious day.

Wylan had found his real home.

#wylan hendriks #wylan van sunshine #wylan van eck #wesper #fanfiction #wesper fanfic #six of crows #six of crows fanfic #crooked kingdom #shadow and bone #jack wolfe #angst with a happy ending #angsty #angst #hehe torture #fck Jan van eck

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ilreleonewikia13 · 1 year

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Before you read, I wrote the first draft of this post in October, then I resumed it in April, but then in May I decided to heavily re-edit it when I noticed the massive grammatical errors that I left. So the version you will read is quite changed from its original form. Starting with the decision to split it into more chapters and not in a single piece as I did before. I even tried to add more characterization to some events as I noticed that maybe I rushed up some important things, cause when I wrote this "fanfic that is not a fanfic" I didn't have a clear vision of the events in their complexity. Some parts were very detailed and explained well, while other parts are only briefly mentioned. As I re-edit it I tried to make everything more cohesive and pleasing to read. For this reason, unlike the first version, this post will only be about the disclaimers and the introduction of my "fanfiction not fanfiction", as the whole "story" will be published on AO3. As I'm writing this I've already posted 2 of the 5 parts, and right now I'm working on the editing of the 3th chapter.

The Doom in Our Blood Comes Back - the Fanfic of a Fanfic

INTRODUCTION TO THE MANUSCRIPT: THE CHRONICLES OF TWO DRAGONS

TRIUMPHS AND DEFEAT

THE CONQUEST OF DORNE

RUBIES AND IRON

When do you start to realize that a fanfiction stops being just a fanfiction and becomes a real work of entertainment?

For me it's when reading it makes you want to theorize about it as if it were a real book and even before it is finished: this is what happened to me with "The Blacks and the Greens" by @sweetestpopcorn a fanfiction (which almost every fan who started watching the series has read if like me you went looking for Daemyra fanfics on AO3 as soon as it started) that tells the story of the Dance of Dragons starting with the idea that Daemon and Rhaenyra got married as soon as their "affair" was discovered, thus an AU of the original plot leading to a completely different scale of events from the original plot of the series/book.

This story, still in progress (at the exact moment I’m writing this post it arrived “just” at its 170th chapter) has gripped me so much this past month that my brain convinced me that this was the real canon story and made me completely forget about the existence of the TV series: so if you are interested to read this AU I suggest you read the original fic, even if it’s a little bit long cause it’s totally worth it.

I thought about writing an actual story about these ideas I had but then changed my mind. It didn't make sense to write about one idea when I already had a bigger story planned that wasn't finished yet.

As I said before, the story from where I take inspiration is only halfway done and things might change a lot in the upcoming chapters as I write this post. This means that the characters I'll talk about in this headcanon might have died to are going to because I don't control the story, the author does.

As I write this post, my idea for "this story" went in a totally different direction than what the original author intended. It became its own separate version of the Blacks and the Greens, with a different set of rules and logic.

I am a big fan of the Black side in the civil war and like happy endings. I wanted Helaena to be happy with her kids and for Rhaenyra to rule the Seven Kingdoms with her husband and raise her five children. In my imagination, the Greens give up quickly and Rhaenyra becomes the Queen without any fighting. She brings both sides together and makes the dynasty stronger.

This means that in this universe almost all of the Targaryen family is still alive and because the war didn't last too much the finance of the kingdom is not significantly damaged making the reign of the Black Queen very prosperous and full of innovations, technically and artistically speaking, making for them more effortless to conquest Dorn and made Westeros finally United.

The first idea for this story was to talk about Rhaenyra and Daemon's five children and their fun experiences instead of just focusing on Rhaenyra and Daemon's relationship, which is already the main focus of The Blacks and The Greens.

When I was reading the fanfic for the first time, I knew that liked Baela the most because of her personality: plus in my head, she's like a female version of Daemon for this reason, I decided to use her as the main character in my story.

She, in my mind, had the right characteristic to be our main POV, being, in my head, the “middle child” of the group - so the one who is between Aegon and Viserys (the boys) and Rhaena and Visenya (the girls) - and that belong to both of the two worlds, the feminine and the masculine, and have both these sides with her. She, in my fantasy, will spend a lot of time with her two brothers, with whom she will share a very strong bond as a very strong rivalry for the attention of their father; with the girls too she will have a special relationship. Especially with Rhaena who is her twin, who is, in some way, her opposite and her complementary, especially in the way they decide to express their femininity over the years. I think that in the Book-canon, Baela looks more masculine than what it was depicted in The Blacks and the Greens, and because this headcanon is heavily inspired by that fanfic, I decided to follow this vision more than the canon one.

In this universe, she dresses like a combination of Queen Visenya, whom Baela really likes, and Queen Rhaenys. Baela is both strong and sensual like her mother Rhaenyra. She wears bright colors like red and loves jewelry.

I thought about what clothes would look good on her at the court. I imagined she would like dresses that were fun and sexy, with low necklines and tight bodices. These dresses would be like armor to her and would have lots of beads on them. I got ideas from the outfits worn by Anne Boleyn in the show The Tudors, which I really like.

She likes to show she is comfortable with her sexuality, without feeling ashamed for having fun with men as she thinks that both women and men should be able to act in the same way. Besides her regular clothes, I also see her wearing softer and masculine tunics as she trains, showing how much she loves the culture of the East continents. Even though she doesn't like to study, Baela enjoys reading High Valyrian poems and listening to Lysene music, as she prefers to sing over playing it. I can imagine her spending time flying and staying with her dragon more than her siblings. She will become very fond of her dragon, Moondancer. She will also train with her brothers with the sword and be very good at it.

Because Baela became a such strong and intense character in my mind, I started to think that she needed an equally strong and enigmatic counterpart that matched it, but at the same time opposed it and gave it a hard time: or in reality the opposite, that is someone she could challenge and confront, someone equally crazy and reckless, but by the opposite and darker energy.

And so that at any moment this post headcanon "The Blacks and the Greens" has become somehow a story focused on Baela and Aemond, or at least with a particular focus on the relationship and the clashes between these two.

Let me make it clear that the choice to "pair" these two characters were not based on a double interpretation of the original story, which clearly shows a strong dislike for Aemond and the Greens in general. The decision to highlight Aemond's character was solely influenced by the irresistible charm of Ewan Mitchell, the actor who played the role in the television adaption, which unfortunately clouded my judgment. To be absolutely clear, I have never felt any form of empathy towards him during my entire fanfiction journey, except for some mere pity.

There were multiple factors that led me to spare the lives of Aemond and Aegon, as I believed it would be more gratifying to let them suffer as they experienced the consequences of all the actions that they made thought the first half of The Blacks and the Greens and the accompanying disgrace of their defeat, rather than simply executing them on the spot.

In this headcanon, Aemond will undergo significant transformations, causing a profound shift in his mentality and character due to experiencing a series of intense and traumatic events. As a result, this version of Aemond will differ significantly from both the Bookcanon and the Blacks and the Greens. The decision was serendipitously influenced by reading a particular sentence in the fanfic where the detestable Aemond ridicules Daemon for allowing Rhaenyra to mistreat him and become submissive to his sister, referring to him as a "slut." Aemond expresses his reluctance to ever allow a woman to control him as his uncle did.

Well, these two simple sentences made me decide that I need to create my own headcanon where Aemond would become the exact thing that he always derided his uncle for: a "loser" who would be bossed around by all the women in his life. And not only command but as a great misogynistic bastard who was, after touching the bottom of the funds, it would be a woman to save him and put him on track, making him feel indebted to her.

So this is how this literary experiment was born.

A simple and very banal enemies-to-lovers story with A LOT of drama and a bunch of dragons, but that needs the perfect setting to work, for this reason, most of the work I did was on figuring out how to set the side character and the background events in a way that could serve my goal.

As I specified many times in this exaggeratedly verbose disclaimer and in the tags this is not actual fanfic, I will not so use a prostatic style like many other stories in this platform, still, I want my readers to have a pleasing experience while reading this work, the result of a very elaborate mental wank and my pressing need to take my mind off my real duties, so I decided to write the whole thing as if it were a cross between historical writing and the introduction to a Greek tragedy.

Imagine, just like in Fire and Blood, that an obviously bored scholar set out to write the memoirs of Rhaenyra and her deeds; as I tried to make up this story I even tried to figure out the timeline of our characters' birth, some of them are the canon ones used in the books, while the others are the ones I tried to calculate trying to use some mathematics and the information that the writer give us on her fic. This means that it's not very precise, but I hope it's remotely accurate.

Aemond= 110

Daeron =114

Addam=114

Alyn=115

Larra= 115

Aegon III = 118

Viserys = 119

Daenaera = 120

Baela and Rhaena =121

Visenya= 125

Jaehaerys and Jaehaera = 123

Maelor = 127

Baelor = 130

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queenofthearchipelago · 4 months

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im so curious, what was that fic you read about arthur going back in time and trying to fix things, going through every episode? you mentioned it the tags of a merlin post and it sounds really interesting

Hi! I, too, have been wondering what that fic was all day since I wrote those tags. Ever since I made my ao3 account about 2 years ago, I've privately bookmarked every fanfic I finished reading with my own tags and with commentary of what was good and bad literally for this exact situation where I remember a fic and want to find it again just so I know I didn't dream it. But it wasn't in my ao3 bookmarks, and I never did much reading on ao3 as a guest, which tells me I read it on fanfiction.net.

So I went there and tried finding it but I must admit, I never really got the hang of looking for things over there. It's not as well put together as the archive, after all.

I know that the fic was in Arthur's POV. I know that it started off with episode 1 and that Arthur quickly puts together what happened to him (that he died in Merlin's arms and then woke up in his bed about 10 years earlier) and he starts going through all the episodes being very nice to Merlin. I know that Time Travel was involved. I know that we go through all the episodes in order until episode 10, where things go a bit differently after the events of the battle at Ealdor.

I wish I knew how to find it based on that, but I don't.

If you go looking for it yourself, I must warn you of attempted suicide and implied suicide towards the end of the fic. There's more time travel things that happen, where Old Merlin, who is now maybe 500 years old, replaces the Young Merlin that was with Arthur and we come to learn that after Arthur's death, Merlin tried very hard to be patient and wait for him, but couldn't do it. Problem was, he was immortal. So he tried all sorts of things to try and end his waiting. He correctly guessed that if he succeeded then he would be reunited with Arthur, but the whole thing was very dark and concerning and I remember it being the topic of an entire chapter and Arthur insisted on talking about it, so it wasn't just a pass and go plot point. So please be careful if you go searching for it!

To make up for it, let me guide you to one of my top 3 favorite Merlin fanfics of all time, also on fanfic.net (it's not on ao3, or I'd guide you there). Essentially, what if Arthur found out right at the beginning of season 3? This fic is basically the story I thought I was getting into when watching season 1. Arthur eventually finding out, his friendship and brotherhood and also two sides of the same coin-ed-ness with Merlin growing stronger all the time because now he knows, and deeper exploration into what Merlin's powers might be in a way that doesn't overpower him or create unnecessary rules. Arthur having to go behind Uther's back to protect Merlin, much in the same way that Merlin protects him all the time. And as you get deeper into the story, one by one the others find out too. Gwen, Gwaine, Morgouse... It's just so well put together. Like I said, it's everything I thought the show would do, until you realized the show wasn't going to do it. Highly HIGHLY recommend it.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/6319981/1/A-Question-of-Motives

(Again, I'm so sorry I don't have the fic I mentioned earlier today, I hope you aren't too disappointed. But I love the merlin fandom, I've been in it since 2014, and I'm always down to talk about fics, and just anything else about this show. One of the fandoms of all time, truly.)

#thank you for sending the ask!#bbc merlin #merlin #bbc merlin fanfic #tw suicide #thoughtsfromthequeen #asks

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kalinara · 3 months

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So I've seen this post going around that features quotes from various authors who dislike fanfiction, or think fanfiction is illegal. Of course, this being fandom, the post is intended to mock these authors.

Here's my controversial opinion: I think an author has every right to dislike fanfiction.

I'm not saying I agree with them. It'd be pretty hypocritical of me if I did. I've written fanfiction, I love reading fanfiction. I don't know enough about copyright law to really debate the legality of it. (And honestly, I don't think most of the people pointing and laughing at that post do either.) I'll leave that up to AO3's legal department, with the caveat that even lawyers who are experts in their fields don't always agree on the exact interpretation of a law.

I think it's an asshole move to threaten a lawsuit, but I haven't actually heard of anyone doing that since Anne Rice.

I agree, sometimes it's funny when give some of these authors a closer look. Diana Gabaldon, rather infamously, was inspired by Jamie from Doctor Who, to the point where her hero shares the name of the character and the actor. One of my personal favorite authors, P. N. Elrod, dislikes fanfiction, though she's written for licensed properties, and even published a novel where Quincy Morris ended up a vampire!

Personally, I think they're a bit hypocritical. But obviously, to THEM, there's a distinction. Gabaldon might have been inspired to create her hero, but she's not really writing Doctor Who. The characters and plots are original. Elrod's licensed work is contracted, legally approved and done with permission OR involve works that are now in Public Domain. It clearly makes a difference to them, whether or not we agree.

I'm not saying "Don't write fanfic.". I'm not even saying "don't write fanfic when the authors don't like it." I personally believe that fanfiction is a product by and for fans and the original creators ought to butt out.

But I think they have the right to feel the way they do. For whatever reason. Even if they're being silly about it.

(I think we've all, at times, stumbled on a fic or meta that's so off base that it's almost, or actually offensive. Imagine how much more aggravating it would be if you were the one who originally made it!)

Oh and it's really silly when folk try to pretend that the only authors who hate fanfic are the bad ones, while the good ones all appreciate it. It's a variation on that same stupid idea that only good people have talent, while the bad people all suck. The world would be much easier if the only people with talent were the people who agreed with us, and had the same morals, ethics, and general tastes that we have. But the world doesn't work that way.

Heck, if the author didn't have SOME talent, we wouldn't want to be writing fic in their universe in the first place. (Discounting spite fics, but those are relatively few in the grand scheme of things.)

Fanfic, hell fandom, is the business of fans for fans. The authors shouldn't be involved, except possibly as an anonymous spectator pointing and laughing. Or cringing and crying. Depending on the fandom.

If you leave the authors alone, you probably won't ever have to even know their opinion about fanfic anyway.

And we should leave the question of legality up to the lawyers that know what they're talking about.

#fandom woes

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londonhalcyon · 1 year

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Hello! Are there any ideas from the Mad Witch that didn't make the cut? And have you noticed any changes in your writing since you started?

Hello there!

2. Any ideas that didn’t make the cut?

Many! You can see from the “Deleted and Bonus Content” compilation on AO3 that plans change, and characters sometimes don’t go in the direction I originally expected.

Some ideas not in the deleted content that I considered but rejected:

Penny questions her sexuality and kisses Lily but ultimately concludes she’s straight. This would have confused Lily and complicated the story beyond what I could keep on track

Penny questions her sexuality and kisses Lily, which makes her realize she might be bisexual but still doesn’t have any feelings for Lily. And honestly? If I was willing to devote 100K more words to this fic, I would have loved to explore that plot point because a queer platonic relationship between them would be awesome. But there’s already so much going on I couldn’t do it justice

Tulip kisses Lily (a lot of cut kisses in this fic, apparently?) as a wild way to prove to herself that she no longer fancies her and doesn’t feel a “spark.” The moment never felt right while I writing, though, and I preferred Lily’s first in-fic kiss to be with Merula anyway

During Lily and Jacob’s camping trip, before the mother dragon arrives, the hatchlings come down from the mountain in the middle of the night and attempt to break into the tent. I wanted to add this scene, but the chapter got too long

15. Any changes in my writing since I started?

I started writing fanfic when I was 10 or 11, so I sincerely hope so.

Jokes aside, absolutely! I can’t read my older fics on AO3 without wincing—even the ones that are only a year old. I can’t even read the older Mad Witch chapters without some measure of pain. I won’t point out the exact changes because I don’t want to call attention to them, but I always see what I would have done differently now, and it takes an extreme amount of willpower not to give every chapter a complete and thorough edit. I know if I edit the earlier chapters now, my writing will just change again and it will have been a wasted effort, so I’ve promised myself that I’m not allowed to touch those chapters until I’ve written the final one.

Regardless of how painful it is to read my old writing, I treat the fact that I see what I could have done differently—could have done better—as a positive thing, because it’s a sign of how far I’ve come. I’m proud of it!

Questions from this ask game.

#ask the mad witch #the mad witch

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prepnursey · 2 years

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10,11,15,and 29 for the ask game? ~dexsbruins

Thanks for asking! Questions are from this post

10. How do you stay motivated to finish what you’ve started?

Great question, honestly. Most of my published fic has been created as either part of fandom theme weeks (and it's been short oneshots) so there's been the pressure to finish and post the thing during that day, or as a part of a big bang event, so someone quite literally gave me a schedule and told me when I had to be done.

Still, I've got a chaptered fic I haven't updated in a year, and my newest fic sat half-completed for a while when I didn't even think about it. I write because it's fun, but I think the final push to get something polished enough that I want to show it to people is at least partially caused by the desire to get attention. Who doesn't like seeing nice tumblr tags or enthusiastic ao3 comments?

11. What’s your longest fanfic?

That would be She knows herself (and that's enough), my technically canon-compliant big bang fic about Whiskey being a trans woman, dating Tango and Foxtrot and going to the NHL.

This fic is my baby, I had a wonderful time writing it (by which I mean projecting onto Whiskey) and honestly I think about it approximately ten times a week

15. OCs or no OCs?

My fics have their fair bit of OCs, but I'm more in my comfort zone writing the inner landscapes of characters I know and understand well, so the OCs are very much there to move the plot, rather than to have rich inner lives of their own.

29. What’s more difficult? Fanfics or original work?

Hmm, both have their difficulties. I feel like my strength as a writer (or maybe just what I feel most comfortable doing) is writing characters' thoughts (and describing nature. i love talking about forests and wetlands), but I'm not really great at developing characters and giving them distinct personalities.

In original fiction it's easier to get around these issues, I can create characters that are easy for me to write and just write them walking around a town experiencing gay angst and thinking in melodramatic metaphors (I should finish this story, it slaps but I get sad every time I read it because the main character's so stuck! but then he starts flirting with a guy and it's not going anywhere because I don't know how to write it!)

In fanfic I avoid characters who I have difficulty with, I have so many ideas for fics with a lot of Bitty in them, but I don't know if I'll ever write them because his speech patterns are so difficult to get right! But on the other hand having those canon personalities helps me distinguish characters, even if they all tend closer to my style of introspective and sort of serious. I think Tango is a great example of this, I probably wouldn't put a character like him into my original writing, but in fanfic I can sort of write his canon personality, so it creates an interesting contrast with Whiskey, who very much has the exact same personality as most of the main characters in my original writing.

I don't think it really contributes to the difficulty that much, but I want to mention that I write fanfic in English, while my original fiction is in Finnish. I think what I write in both of them plays to my strengths, because writing natural-sounding dialogue is absolutely horrible in Finnish because of how different spoken and written Finnish are, but I have a bigger vocabulary for waxing poetic about trees in Finnish. (although poetic might be a bit misleading, since I write poetry in both languages) ((well okay the nature poems are all in finnish, but i write notes app poetry about gender and family and everything in whichever language the idea comes to mind in))

So in conclusion, I really can't say which one is easier, but they are pretty different for me!

#my post #ask #ask game

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bettsfic · 3 years

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march pinned: ending the sex project

in the march edition of my lowkey writing-related newsletter, in addition to my writing-related post roundup and upcoming consultation availability, i have personal essay recommendations and a segment on the definition of a project!

for more information on my creative coaching services, check out my carrd.

if you want to receive my lowkey writing-related newsletter directly, you can subscribe here.

full newsletter below the cut, or you can read it here.

fuck february, amiright?

i thought january was bad. but february. february was the stuff of nightmares. my cousin passed away from covid (you can read about her here; she was really an amazing person and i feel so lucky to have known her). i was finally formally diagnosed with PCOS (bittersweet, i guess). my car broke down. i took two (2) days off and it took me two and a half weeks to get caught up again. i can only hope march treats us all a little more gently.

the good news is, i finished revisions on my short story collection to send to my agent, finished workshop submissions for the semester, and now i can return to my first love, fanfiction. that i am constantly working through original fiction to return to fanfiction has been making me think a lot about the nature of a creative, capital-p Project. so, this month’s BTALA (been thinkin a lot about) is going to inspect the concept of a “project.”

new resource

last month i unveiled a folder of my favorite short stories which i’m pleased to hear several of you have perused and gotten some inspiration from. this month i’ve compiled my favorite personal essays. there are fewer essays than there are short stories because i’ve broken them into two groups: personal and craft. next month i hope to have the craft essays compiled.

i’m always looking for more things to love, so if you have recommendations for your favorite short stories and essays, i’d be happy to hear them!

writing-related posts

how to physically maneuver the revision process

the difference between M and E ratings of fic

resources for worldbuilding (check out the reblogs for more!)

a couple syntax/prose book recs

how to break a long work into chapters

march availability

unfortunately i have to cut my coaching hours down a bit, so i don’t have any openings left in march, but i have some availability in april. if you’re interested in a writing consultation, please fill out this google form!

you can learn more about my services on my carrd.

what i’m into rn

for the past year, i’ve basically been trapped in a 10x10 room, and my health is definitely reflecting that, both mentally (does anyone else feel like they’re living in groundhog day? just, every day being exactly the same except fractionally worse than the day before??) and physically (i reorganized the kitchen and could barely move for two days).

reader, i have discovered something called “walking,” in which i put on real human shoes and go outside. it feels strange, bestial. neighbors wave hello to me. a harrowing experience.

while doing this, this walking, i’ve been listening to the lolita podcast which a friend recommended to me, a ten-episode series that dives into everything lolita: the novel itself, its context, adaptations, greater cultural responses, and — as a sticker on my laptop says — vladimir “russian dreamboat” nabokov. as far as i can tell it seems well-researched and presents the many perspectives of lolita in a fair way. i’m only a few eps in, but i’m entranced so far. highly recommended if you, like me, have a complicated relationship with lolita.

i’ve also found myself mildly addicted to a mobile otome game called obey me, which. look i know it’s like the definition of cringe but it’s also mind-numbingly fun and if i want to spend my minimal free time pretending 7 demon brothers are all vying for my affection then that’s between me and god. it’s a lot of what i loved about WoW: frequent events, bright colors, a daily to do list of simple but satisfying tasks, many many rewards, and it doesn’t take itself very seriously. and if i have 4k fic written of mammon/reader that’s nobody’s business but mine and my longsuffering ao3 subscribers.

i’m telling you this because i don’t know anyone else who plays it and am desperate to trade headcanons. so if you play, or start playing, hit me up!! i will give u mad tips and daily AP.

been thinkin a lot about

the project. the project. even the word “project.” PROject (noun). proJECT (verb). what is the project? “project” comes from the latin pro and jacare which means “to throw forward,” or projectum which means “something prominent.” a projector throws forward an image. to project onto something means to throw your perspective onto something else. to embark on a project is to make something prominent in your life. the concept of “the projects” comes from public housing projects, the government throwing forward affordable housing.

what is the project? in joseph harris’ essay “coming to terms” he says that “to define the project of a writer is…to push beyond his text, to hazard a view about not only what someone has said but also what he was trying to accomplish by saying it.” harris’ perspective is that of an english teacher encouraging his students to read critically, not just to summarize a text but to find its project, its greater purpose. and while i first read this essay in a seminar on composition pedagogy, it stuck with me as a writer. it made me reconsider the greater nature of the creative project.

how many of us, if asked to describe our writing project, would begin with a plot or character premise, the nuts and bolts of a specific story? maybe even the working title? but i wonder, is breaking out the plot really the project? is the discipline of sitting down and typing really the project? and when the story is finished, is the project over? what is the project?

in 2019, i wrote 86k words of a novel. i began revising that novel last fall, and i’m finding that i’ll probably keep maybe less than 10k of that initial draft. i’m not bothered by that. the novel i wrote before that started at 125k, then i rewrote the entire thing to 200k, then i whittled it back down to 160k, and next i’ll be tasked with paring it back down to 80k. i’m not bothered by that either. in the past five years or so i’ve written about 2 million words, and i’ve only published 20k of them. only 1% of what i’ve written, i’ve published. in the words of lauren cooper (catherine tate), i’m not bothered.

i used to see publication as the birth of the project, and writing it akin to a long gestation period. then i saw publication as the death of the project, and its life was lived in its drafting. now, publication seems irrelevant to the project. the confines of a story and its many revisions are also irrelevant to the project. the beginning of a story is not the start of the project and the end of the story is not the end of the project. the project is larger than the story, its revisions, its publication, and its eventual readership.

i think it took me so long to see this because for so many years i was still in my first project, the sex project, an exploration of trauma and sexual identity, which began in 2014 with destiel fanfiction, endured through many fandom shifts, my MFA, years adrift as an adjunct, all the way through 2020 with the completion of my short story collection. i used to wonder how anyone could write about anything other than sex. to me it was the only topic worth my attention. i was certain that i would spend my entire life being a sex writer and i’d never find fulfillment writing a young adult sci fi adventure or a highly literary novel about complicated family dynamics. i was baffled by people who were interested in other things, who could write entire novels without using the word “cock” even once.

then my sex project ended. i don’t know when exactly it happened or why, but suddenly i realized i never wanted to write another artful description of an orgasm or find a tactful euphemism for a vagina ever again (personally i prefer “wet cunt” because not only is it blunt, i find it phonetically pleasing). obviously i’m still writing explicit fanfic but it doesn’t feel the same as it used to. sex feels more sidelined to me, even if it’s still the center and drive of a fic. i no longer get any personal satisfaction from writing it, although i do get satisfaction in sharing the work for readers to enjoy.

it’s like i’ve somehow solved the biggest puzzle of my life. or i guess made peace with my meanest monster, that extremely complicated double-mind of desire that some non-sex-repulsed asexuals feel: you want to feel desire you can’t actually feel so you write it into fiction, to try to understand this thing you can’t have and which society tells you you’re missing, and you don’t even know if you don’t have it, because you still feel desire for affection and intimacy, and maybe even a desire to be desired. and for those of us who are asexual and have c-ptsd, sex you don’t actually want (but don’t know you don’t want, because maybe you’re ambivalent and mildly curious and touch-starved) and an unrelenting drive toward people-pleasing can be a dangerous combination. how can you ever know what consent is if you always put other people’s desires above your own?

maybe i’m alone in this. maybe i’m not. maybe for most people, wanting sex is a light switch: yes i want it, or no i don’t. but for me, i had to write a whole lot of words to figure out things like desire, consent, intimacy, forgiveness, the shape that good love takes. the lengthy theoretical flowchart of “i might be interested in having sex if this and this and this and this and this happens in this exact order and under these exact circumstances.”

it was hard to write something into reality that i have never seen except in pieces, in subtext i clung to with no lexicon to give it shape and meaning. te lawrence in lawrence of arabia. some of tarantino’s early work. the film benny and joon. and weirdly, the star wars prequels (that one’s hard to explain; i’ll spare you). i don’t think the sex project was about coming to terms with my asexuality as much as it was trying to organize my thoughts and feelings by continuously rendering my own experiences within a greater, shinier ideal — like how you sometimes have to unravel the entire skein of yarn to find the loose end, and only then can you get started.

i guess i’m in the infancy of the power project now. i’m moving toward themes of control, infamy, greatness. the exact circumstances in which atrocity occurs. how people rise into leadership and fall from grace. the consequences of success. i don’t know why this project has come to me, or what, if anything, it has to do with me. i’m not famous and have no intention of becoming famous; i don’t have social power or influence, at least not beyond my little corner of fandom, and i’m not interested in having it. and yet, here we are, already hundreds of thousands of words in.

my fics digging for orchids (tgcf) and a standing engagement (the hunger games) deal with the detriments of fame. and even float (breaking bad) to a degree is about the aftermath of being so close to power. my novel cherry pop, loosely based on macbeth, is about an ongoing power exchange between two teenage girls. my other novel, vandal, is about a girl who believes she has magic powers and casts a spell on her neighbor to fall in love with her. and i’m in the very early stages of a novel called groundswell, a cult story i’ve been wanting to write for years. i had no idea why i couldn’t write it until i realized it wasn’t yet my project. i’m not even to the stage of developing characters, let alone a premise or plot. i’m still just building my aesthetic pile (i discuss the aesthetic pile here, as well as vandal in more detail), watching documentaries on cults, reading books, finding inspiration, marking down ideas as they come. it may be years before i’m ready to sit down and write it.

now that i know what the project is, i have more patience with myself. it doesn’t bother me to rewrite a novel from the beginning, or to scrap novels altogether, because the story isn’t the project. the project cannot be diminished by cutting words, sentences, paragraphs, entire chapters. the project does not have a product. the project cannot be published. the project is in the practice, in dragging the impossibly large into clear, acute existence, so you can see it. so you can see the very center of what you thought was an unknowable thing.

#pinned #lkwrnl

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hopeswriting · 3 years

Note

Hullo hullo Hopes, it's for the ask game ! 4, 23 and 43 ? :O

Hi there, thank you for the ask!

4. Link your three favorite fics right now.

I simply could not only choose three of them, so you get six instead, in no particular order.

come get me by MakeItVoid on ffnet (Katekyo Hitman Reborn).

Reborn waits a little impatiently for someone to come get him. He doesn't know what to do now. The fire is creeping closer. (Reborn doesn't want to die like this.)

It’s a one-shot, with the exact dynamic I reach for in all my Arco fics, and it hits just all the spots for me. Simply cannot recommend it enough.

Just Another Tuesday by ariathal2410 on ffnet (Katekyo Hitman Reborn).

Tsuna doesn't know why all this supernatural shit started happening in his life, but he'd really like it to stop now please. Mild Arco27

OR in which Tsuna attracts too much attention because he's surprisingly good at recognizing supernatural beings (and he's just too cute to resist).

A 10k one-shot where Tsuna is in college, and keeps stumbling upon these supernatural creatures that then just never leave his life. Very domestic fluff like, and never fails to brighten my mood when I need it. Very funny too.

Survivor by atruwriter on ffnet (Harry Potter).

Waiting. He was always waiting. He'd already buried one best friend and now the other will follow. There was nothing he could do or say. There was no Harry without Hermione. Ron witnessed the beginning and now he must accept the end. HHr. 4parts Complete!

It’s been a long time since I reread this one tbh, but as long as you’re a Hhr shipper or just don’t mind the ship? I recommend it a thousand times.

It’s written from Ron’s pov, and is written so well, and I remember having called it a masterpiece after I read it, and I still stand by it. Just a very beautiful fic in all its tragedy.

Sincerely, Scattered Shards by You_Light_The_Sky on ao3 (Katekyo Hitman Reborn).

Tsuna’s the foolish type to give a bit of his heart to anyone he meets. No one ever wanted his ugly heart shards until he met his Guardians. No one ever treasured his heart shards until them either. Hints of All27 and R27.

It’s an ongoing fic, and I don’t remember it in details anymore lol, but just read it. You want to read it. You won’t regret reading it if it seems the type of fic you might like.

It’s beautiful, and sad, and a bit tragic at times, but then Tsuna starts finding his Guardians and it becomes a little better. And worth it.

Those Last Few Memories by Ourliazo on ao3 (Katekyo Hitman Reborn).

In one future, the Arcobaleno band together and try to fight off the Anti Tri-ni-set radiation.

As the author says, “ this story follows their slow descent into death”, and it’s low key fucking heartbreaking, and high key gets you in the feels and makes you want to bawl your eyes out, so really, I can only recommend it asdfgh.

Target Acquired: Wicked Jester by poorasdirt on ao3 (Katekyo Hitman Reborn).

Colonnello has always been a military man. He understood what led to him being cursed. He understood why the others had been cursed. Or, well, why most of the others had been cursed. Skull's motivations had always been a mystery to him. Now that the curse had been lifted, Colonnello could finally sit back and try to puzzle it out. If only it were that easy.

Or Colonnello's instincts were telling him something wasn't right and curiosity only kills cats.

NELLO/SKULL SUPREMACY. Also told in Nello’s pov so Nell-centric. But also entirely about Skull, so Skull-centric. What more do you want??

Azesdfgh ahem, jokes aside. This one is seriously good. Not just because it’s focused first on Nello & Skull relationship (it’s actually a gen fic lol, my bad), or because it has just the right amount of Poly!Arco hinted for us shippers even if it’s platonic/found family.

The fic gives Skull a very in depth and intricate backstory, and for having read my fair share of Skull-centric fics, it’s a very original one. A very mysterious one too, and the fic has a spy/thriller aspect to it that’s very fun to read, as you discover more and more about Skull along with the Arco.

Some of Skull’s backstory also tie with canon worldbuilding the author then expands with their own take on it, and even if it’s a characters driven story, and the plot is only really there first to enhance that fact, it still gets you curious to see it unfold.

And of course the Arco interactions with each other. The fic has a very low key found family vibes fitting to it, but that are very present nonetheless, and feel genuine and heartwarming.

Though there’s some Sky Arco, and specifically Uni and Aria antagonism, but as a Giglio Nero stan myself, it’s not present enough you can’t overlook it if you try.

So if you like Skull and/or Colonnello and/or found family Arco and you didn’t read the fic yet? Don’t wait any longer!

23. What’s your absolute favorite trope to write?

Already answered this one so I’ll just copy past it!

I’ve been thinking about it, and it’s gotta be Hurt/Comfort, both as a writer and a reader. And this is probably just me projecting lol, but there’s just something in seeing characters be hurt/hurting, knowing they’ll have/will be given care after that speaks to me.

Also I guess it’s pretty obvious to say it, but mostly as a reader, the hurt must come with comfort. Or at least I need to be 100% certain the comfort will come at some point, and will matter.

And I actually think that’s why I can only handle so much amount of angst, because unless it’s tagged for it (and even then, I find Angst with a Happy Ending and such, and Hurt/Comfort just don’t hit the same way), you never know if it’ll be worth it in the end. And I’m a big softie so I can’t handle it zsdfgdsc.

A very close second favorite trope, also both as a writer and a reader, is when any characters with Responsibilities/Duties/Expectations (namely The Chosen One trope and such) just say fuck it all and does fuck it all.

Either by finding a solution that won’t leave them incredibly traumatized when all’s said and done, or by actually fucking off and making it everyone else’s problem.

I find it’s mostly present in Dark![Character Name] fics, which I also love to write and read, so it all works out for me lol.

43. Talk about a positive experience with fanfiction or the fanfiction community that you will always remember.

Mmmh, not sure if I have one yet? I only really started trying to get involved in the fanfiction community last year, so I feel maybe I’m not quite there to have these type of experiences.

That said, I can only talk about that one time I did a fanfic event for the first time, and @chierry was there every step of the way, leaving me a comment on each of my fics, and that was incredibly motivating. Felt really amazing too, and made the event that much more fun, so shoutout to her<3.

Also shoutout to that one time where we got Arco brainrot at the same time on the same frequency, and kind of just went nuts about it for a while zsdxfgh. That was very fun too!<3

#ask games #khr fic rec #long post #echtach messy place

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regicidal-optimism · 3 years

Note

hey i just wanted to drop by and say i really really adore your writing, the ones i've read from you have hit rather close to home and i'm pretty sure you're one of my favorite writers on ao3 as of now. if it isnt too inconvenient, i was wondering if you had any reading recs or writing tips on hand? or else please dw ab it

!!!! thank you anon!

writing tips:

all advice for how to write that’s like “write every day! write 200 words a day! write every week! outline first! don’t outline first! start with character sheets! definitely do not start with character sheets!” is incredibly personal. if it works for you it works for you and that’s great but whatever Cool Trick someone else has to get themselves to write may or may not work for you and that’s fine and it doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you or your writing, people are just different.

read. read a lot. take notes of sentences you really like, for meaning or for imagery or just for sound. poke at things you like to figure out why they work and poke at things you don’t like to figure out why they don’t work. read variety, lots of different genres, poetry and prose, fanfic and non-fan fiction. in particular read in the genre you’re going to write in but the more different things you have experience with the more you can steal from them all.

everyone’s first [idk exact numbers but it’s a whole lot] words are going to suck. i was lucky enough to start writing really young, such that i got most of the really egregious suckage out of the way before i was old enough to consider putting any of it on the internet, but the writing i publish now is the product of eleven years (at a conservative estimate; i could have said 14) of writing and telling stories almost constantly. no matter what it takes time.

for me personally the most important thing is character subjectivity - not just “what’s happening” but “what do these people think is happening, what filters are they seeing it through, how do their past experiences affect how they interpret this one, which things do they notice and which do they fail to notice, which things do they make a note of and which do they not make a note of because that’s just normal, why would they note it.” this is because i personally find that really interesting; other people might prefer other things. but lots and lots of focus on how these specific people are interacting with whatever is around them, as opposed to how a person in general might, is really important to me.

steven brust put forward something i really like called “the cool stuff theory of literature,” which posits that all writing consists of what the writer thinks is cool, and the reader will like it to the extent that they and the writer agree. so what do you think is cool? what kinds of things do you really like writing about? this can be things like “dragons” or things like “people who are doing their best but their best is kind of terrible” or things like “really pretty prose” or things like “engagement with religion,” it doesn’t really matter, but everything i write is optimized for being full of the kind of thing i like writing.

the way i personally do outlining is that i have a list of scenes, and notes about what each scene is doing and why it’s there. if a scene does not have at least two things it’s doing / reasons it’s there, it gets cut. if a scene is a slog to write, i look really hard at the things it’s doing and reasons it’s there, because usually when something is a slog to write the problem is that either i don’t actually have a reason for it to be there, or that it isn’t doing its job.

everyone onscreen is sympathetic, even when they are a disaster person who is making terrible decisions. if i don’t care enough about a character to make them a three-dimensional person whose internal experience i am interested in, i don’t put them onscreen.

relatedly, a frankly embarrassing amount of my writing can be summed up by “everyone here is doing their best, but because they are all traumatized and also they are all disasters and because the circumstances they’re in are hard, their best is kind of terrible.”

for reading recs you may have to be more specific because i am constantly overflowing with reading recs but here’s an abridged list of short-form recs with links:

monet refuses the operation (poem)

the ones who walk away from omelas (specfic short story. even if you think you know it from osmosis i recommend reading it, the discourse around it really doesn’t do it justice.)

and then there were (n-one) (science fiction short story; locked-room mystery about parallel realities and choices)

a mathematician’s lament (essay about math education and beauty)

the ballad of reading gaol (poem)

when the circus lights down (fantasy short story about expectations)

on fairy stories (essay about fantasy writing)

what the caves are trying to tell us (article about cave art and things we don’t understand)

in memory of anton webern, dead september 15, 1945 (poem)

thirteen rules: why mammoth machine cares about worldbuilding (essay about religion)

the cartographer wasps and the anarchist bees (fantasy short story; fairytale-esque with lovely writing)

we know the devil (visual novel; let’s play here). contains people doing their best (but their best kind of sucks), engagement with religion, and really lovely writing.

the old astronomer (poem)

longer form things:

lord of the rings (novels). not for character or even for plot or setting (although i do love the plot and the characters and the setting) but for theme and prose.

the magnus archives (podcast). incredible at the “these people are doing their best, they are all sympathetic, and their best is kind of awful” thing, especially in season four.

heaven will be mine (visual novel; incomplete let’s play here; video playthrough here). gorgeous writing, lots of character stuff, complicated metaphors for queerness, uses words in a really beautiful way.

#for best results use words #grace dot text #anonymous #ask

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lexa-griffins · 3 years

Note

Hi. I don't know about y'all but when I decide that I don't like a story on ao3 and that I won't keep reading it, it's not so much the plot or the writing that I dislike, it is each character's actions and the sets of words used to describe them that bother me. For example, if I see that lexa is always referred to with words like strong, muscles or charismatic and Clarke is always referred to with sweet, soft or curves, I will exit the story. I kind of feel bad about it because I know they probably internalized that in the fandom and they don't even think about it when writing it, and the style and story might be good, but I just can't continue reading it. I feel guilty and like I am too picky and that I should just appreciate someone's hard work instead of reacting that way

Listen, this ask feels like it was ghost written by me and I actually had to question if I didn't have an absent episode and send this to myself!!!!

I am the exact same honestly.... which is why I barely even read clexa fics anymore. There are huge fics out there that have great writing but I just can't get past the character descriptions... I think if there were more fics where their descriptions and personalities matched more how I see them I would be less """"""annoyed""""" when trying to read the ones with the more popular ways the fandom views them, but since there aren't I just get tired and end up not reading them. I have read some of the more popular fics in the fandom and while yes, the writing is fucking good, I either don't finish it or end it not feeling particularly satisfied because I don't feel like I read a clexa fic. It's also the reason why I don't have any particular favorite writer's in the fandom unfortunately and why I take ages anytime someone asks me for a rec list of some sort. I will skip fics that have certain tags because after all, that's what they are there for and you have every right to skip them even if it has a million kudos and everyone praises it.

(About it being a internalized fandom thing.... Even has someone who doesn't enjoy overly feminine curvy "princess" Clarke or all muscles sporty all suits Lexa, I find myself second guessing myself any time i describe them as anything but that because it feels like I'm not describing them as the fandom expects them to be written - which it's a weird insecurity to have because so far I never had anyone say anything about it, neither here not on ao3 and in actuality it only got me some very fun anons to read and respond to!)

Fanfic is supposed to be fun to read and something for you to enjoy. I too feel like I'm overly picky with what I read but if I feel like I'm gonna force myself to read something I don't particularly enjoy then I'm not doing neither me nor the fic writer any favors. As long as you aren't leaving any negative comments on fics simply because you don't like someone's interpretation of a character, it's perfectly fine for you to decide you don't want to read something because of the way a character is being portrait and exit. There are fics out there that are badly written. And I'm sure someone put a lot of hard work into them too and has barely any interaction in it but that doesn't mean you are forced to read them - a fic having a big number of kudos on it and being well written doesn't change that!

This very non linear answer to say: read what you want or don't read what you don't want to read and don't feel like you are just being a picky little thing simply because you dislike the popular interpretation of characters. It happens in every fandom and you're no less right or wrong about your way of viewing clexa simply because your view of them doesn't match the popular fandom interpretation. If you are starting to feel guilty for not reading a certain type of fic or popular fics for what is supposed to be an hobby for you to enjoy (because that has happened to me too) I recommend blocking tags both here and while I don't think ao3 allows you to block tags you can filter them out I'm pretty sure!

#letter opened #there are people who won't read fics the other way around #although there are so little that its easier for them to avoid without feeling guilty even if they are brilliantly written!#READ WHAT YOU WANT!#WRITE WHAT YOU WANT if you do write #I was shaking in my boots before writing DES thinking I was somehow be floaded by hate comments #never #simply because the people who dislike the way I write them either never even clicked on it #or read it. disliked it. and exited it #so yeah that's what I got to say about this!

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kylorengarbagedump · 4 years

Text

Line of Kylo Ren’s Dialogue (NSFW)

Read on AO3.

Summary: Being that this was a fanfiction written by kassanovella, it was to be anticipated that the Reader-character would, in fact, do something that resulted in violent sex with Kylo Ren.

What that would be was difficult to discern, as neither the title, summary, or tags gave any sort of helpful hints as to the content of this one-shot.

Words: 980

Warnings: egregious parody, dubious consent

A/N: I just wanted to make fun of myself because I'm sick of my own bullshit.

"Oh, boy," said the Reader-character (that's you, by the way), "I sure hope nothing happens today that will end with me having violent sex with Kylo Ren!"

That was the statement made by the main character indicating foreshadowing of future events. Being that this was a fanfiction written by kassanovella, it was to be anticipated that the Reader-character would, in fact, do something that resulted in violent sex with Kylo Ren. What that would be was difficult to discern, as neither the title, summary, or tags gave any sort of helpful hints as to the content of this one-shot.

The Reader-character continued throughout her day, doing nothing of value or worth remembering, as this was a one-shot, and her motivations were wholly unimportant. It was only after a short set-up and half-assed attempt at plotting that the Reader-character came into contact with the only person the audience actually gives a shit about: Kylo Ren.

"Kylo Ren," she said. "It's you!"

Kylo Ren looked blank, because writing that is an easy cop-out to make him look complex. "Yes."

"Wow, you sure are big," said the Reader-character, immediately throwing the audience out because that's something they would never say to Kylo Ren. "In comparison to me, I'd say you're massive!"

Kylo Ren took his big ol' enormous gigantic massive overwhelming hands and snatched the Reader-character's neck. Then he said nothing, since the author couldn't think of anything useful or exciting for him to say.

"Let me go!" In this moment, the Reader-character was articulating the exact opposite of what the audience wanted to happen. "I'm both angry and turned on by this!"

"I am annoyed by your shouting."

"This is my only way of demonstrating any sort of personality!" she said. "I have less than 3000 words to establish engaging characterization!"

"Enough." Kylo Ren was becoming inexplicably turned on by this, something that the author never decides to explain or elaborate on. "If you continue, we will have violent sex."

"Oh, no!" replied the Reader-character. "I only halfway want this to happen!"

"I know," said Kylo Ren. "One of the tags is Dubious Consent."

"What? How did you know that?"

"I looked up and read them."

The Reader-character scoffed. "That sounds like a waste of time. You know the author only uses tags to make luke-warm jokes, rather than filling them with useful information about what to expect!"

"Yes." Kylo Ren's face continued to be stoic, which the audience apparently needed a reminder of. "But I think this one might be accurate."

It was at that point Kylo Ren leaned in and started the sex scene, a signal to the audience that they should not have started reading this fanfic on the bus.

The Reader-character's thighs probably clamped together as she pretended to resist Kylo Ren for the benefit of the dubious consent tag. "Why do I never get to start the sex scene?"

"Because writing characters with agency is too difficult."

Kylo Ren then made obvious his thick erection, which was shocking to the Reader-character in its size and girth. Seriously, it was so big that it too could be described with words such as massive enormous gigantic and overwhelming, but those words were already used to describe other parts of Kylo Ren's body. The Reader-character made noises and experienced bodily reactions that were described with lots of adjectives with the intent to drag the scene out as long as possible.

Meanwhile, Kylo Ren refused to take his clothes off as he prepared to enact violent sex. This was both infuriating and baffling to the audience, because they came to read Kylo Ren porn, yet he never bothers to get undressed in any fic on this author's page. It was after some drawn-out foreplay that penis-in-vagina finally, finally happened, though it was written in a way that imitated a bad porno.

"I'm going to fuck your little pussy and make you cum, whore," said Kylo Ren.

"You do that every--fuck--every time!"

"But this time is different," he replied through ragged breath, "because it's happening in a scenario that the author hasn't written about."

The sex was very aggressive and violent in ways that would not appear pleasurable to any typical human. There was also, likely, a bizarre kink or two thrown into the scene, as creating a good or interesting story is always secondary to inserting whatever gross garbage the author has a taste for that week.

Finally, after some dirty talk and more verbal humiliation, both the Reader-character and Kylo Ren came simultaneously in orgasms that were written about in language that failed to capture the reality of most orgasms (disappointing). They breathed and stared at each other in acknowledgement that the sex scene was over and their relationship was now different than it was at the beginning of this fanfiction.

The audience was then forced to read through overwrought flowery paragraphs where the author was clearly trying to shove in as many metaphors and analogies as possible in order to look like she knew what she was doing. Of course, she didn't, and never does, but by opening a thesaurus and beating people over the head with as many different words as possible, the author believes she is tricking people into thinking she is competent. At some point italics were used for emphasis on words she couldn't bother to try and make important through showing versus telling.

"That was a lot of nonsense for one little sex scene," said the Reader-character. "Is the story over yet?"

"A line of Kylo Ren's dialogue."

"What?"

"The author can't think of titles, so I needed to say something she could use as a title."

"Oh."

Kylo Ren continued looking blank and vacant. The Reader-character ruminated on the change in status quo.

"So..." she asked. "How is she going to end the story?"

His eyes glimmered with an emotion. "Like this."

#kylo ren smut #kylo ren x reader #kylo x reader #kylo ren imagine #kylo ren #kylo trash #I wrote this in 30 minutes on my phone before work #many apologies #I just hate myself and my writing rn lmfaoooo

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btsficfinds · 4 years

Text

google searching: a step-by-step guide (with examples)

hey guys, admin rumu here~ we’ve already provided a fairly straightforward guide to google searching in our tips, but it seems some people are still having some issues. if you needed something a little more in-depth or if you were just curious about the process, this is for you! this will be very lengthy as i will be going through every step with different asks. i will not be addressing searching with google cache but if you’d like to see how that's done, dawn has already explained it in this post.

our searches are based on what you send us. if you’re looking for a fic but are confused about what terms to use in your search, write an ask like you’re going to send it to us (but don’t actually send it yet). i’ll be showing you how asks get turned into google searches using some of the asks we’ve previously received, so try this with your own!

general rules (these apply to all examples except example 1)

1. as you might have seen in the google section of the tips, there are some keywords that every search should have:

-the pairing (namjoon/seokjin/yoongi/jimin/taehyung/jungkook) (if you don’t remember the pairing, use the generic ‘bts’) -the platform (tumblr/ao3/etc.) (*if you don’t know where you read it, do not include this) *IF YOU READ THE FIC ON AO3, YOU MAY NOT FIND IT ON GOOGLE. you can (and should) still try, but google gets weird searching for ao3 fics. you might have better luck using ao3′s fic searching system first.

2. USE QUOTES IN APPROPRIATE SITUATIONS. quotes are only useful if used correctly, but they can make a HUGE difference. conversely, use them incorrectly and your search will not work.

3. make sure to actually read through your search results! don’t just assume it’s not what you’re looking for. if it looks like it could be a potential match, click on it and find out.

now let’s take a look at some examples:

*example 1: looking for a specific blog

we already have a tutorial on how to find lost blogs (you can find the link for that in the tips) but maybe you still can’t find it. thinking about asking us? try tumblr search/tags first, then google, then check our lost blogs list (link also in the tips), THEN ask us.

for these asks, you would search the blog name in quotes followed by ‘tumblr’ (e.g. “mintedmango” tumblr or “bluesxde” tumblr)

example 2: you remember...something (it’s extremely vague)

maybe you sent an ask without reading our tips (specifically the part showing how to write an ask for the best results), or maybe you did read them and unfortunately this is really all you remember. we hate to say this, but if you send us an ask like this your chances are slim to none.

the fic relevant parts are highlighted. based off of that, you would know the following: pairing: seokjin/reader fic type: one shot au: best friend

as you can see, there is little to no information here. even if we’ve read the fic they’re looking for, we probably wouldn’t have any idea what you’re talking about. in these situations, we probably would not make any suggestions because there are far too many to list. if you don’t send us more details, then there’s nothing we can do :(

example 3: you remember the title

depending on how unique the title is and how accurate your memory is, this should be fairly easy.

the fic relevant parts are highlighted. based off of that, you would know the following: title: somebody else pairing: taehyung/reader writer: aiscka

unless you misremembered the title or the title is an extremely common word/phrase, you should be able to find the fic simply by using quotation marks. if the title is a common word/phrase it would help to include other details in your search, but if the title is unique enough you probably wouldn’t need it. for this example, you could search: “somebody else” taehyung bts fanfic tumblr and you would be able to find this:

this is one of the top results but maybe you don’t feel like clicking through all the potential options to find the right one. the anon knew the author is this case, so they could also find the fic by searching: “somebody else” aiscka taehyung bts fanfic tumblr which would allow them to find a reblog from the writer’s previous name.

having more details will narrow your search down and make it faster for you to find what you’re looking for.

example 4: you remember the plot and specific/unique keywords (best case scenario)

the more details we have, the better chances we have of finding it. we are not exaggerating when we say we want you to send us EVERYTHING YOU REMEMBER. think we can find it even without all that? or perhaps you aren’t sure if it’ll help? maybe so but it doesn’t matter, we want it anyway!

the fic relevant parts are highlighted. based off of that, you would know the following: pairing: namjoon/reader au: aquarium, veterinarian/doctor, single parent, twins plot: reader meets namjoon and his sons at the aquarium while working

more specific details = more search options but this is enough for us to work with because these details have unique keywords (note: we would still prefer you give us more details than we need than not enough. PLEASE SEND US EVERYTHING YOU REMEMBER). my first search for this would be: namjoon reader tumblr fanfic "aquarium" i can immediately find:

i’ll still skim through the fic to double check, but just based off this i can already tell this is probably what we’re looking for! some other searches we could have tried are: namjoon reader tumblr fanfic "aquarium" vet namjoon reader tumblr fanfic veterinarian “twins” namjoon reader tumblr fanfic single father veterinarian all of these would find the fic we want, and i’m sure you could try other combinations as well. notice that some words have quotes around them and some don’t. how do you know which ones to use quotes for? if you are SURE that those are the exact word/words, put them in quotes. if you don’t know for sure how it was phrased, consider trying searches with and without quotes. ‘single father’ with quotes will only search for ‘single father’. ‘single father’ without quotes will give you results for ‘single dad’, ‘single parent’, ‘single fathers’, etc. in this example, you can see that the correct phrase was ‘single dad’, so not using quotes was the right idea!

example 5: you remember the plot and a name

searching for names is tricky. keep in mind that names must be exact. if you get the spelling wrong, a name will be useless as a keyword and will probably ruin your search.

the fic relevant parts are highlighted. based off of that, you would know the following: pairing: taehyung/reader au: best friend, fuckboy(?) plot: reader is best friends with taehyung, taehyung is blowing reader off for his girlfriend named vicktoria

there are a couple of issues with searching for this: -there is no universal spelling for fuckboy/fuckboi/fuqboii/etc. we all know they mean the same thing, but people can spell it however they want. unfortunately, google doesn’t know how to handle that. it’s also possible that the fic was not tagged with fuckboy, but there was fuckboy behavior present. either way, very difficult to google. -plot events can be hard to search for since it could happen over the span of multiple chapters and/or be explained different ways and google doesn’t know how to search for that either. plot points are useful for fic verifying, but not so much for fic searching. -the aus for this fic are very common. if not for one keyword, this would have been near impossible to search for and to verify.

you could probably guess what the initial search would be: taehyung “vicktoria” bts fanfic tumblr from that you would get:

based on the description, this search result is worth checking out. note that if they had remembered the name as ‘victoria’ or ‘something starting with a v’, this probably would not have worked.

example 6: you vaguely remember the premise, but nothing in detail

unfortunately there isn’t much you can do without specifics. there are TONS of fics out there and we simply cannot find what you’re looking for if there isn’t enough detail. we will try our best, but just know that you should not expect much.

the fic relevant parts are highlighted. based off of that, you would know the following: pairing: taehyung/reader/? fic type: multiple chapters au: yandere plot: reader is in some kind of danger and is saved by taehyung

not very specific, which is why we ask that people try to be as detailed as possible! this ask is pretty vague and it’s difficult to search for a fic without concrete details. ‘yandere’ is a pretty unique keyword so you might want to put it in quotes (some yandere fics aren’t tagged as yandere, but i’m going to assume it was in this case). NOTE: each exact term/phrase should get its own quotes. for example, it would be “taehyung” “yandere”, not “taehyung yandere” so from there you could have: tumblr taehyung “yandere” reader fanfic this search is still extremely broad so there will be a lot of irrelevant results. if you have the patience to check all the pages on google you can, but it would definitely take a while and you might not even find it. too many terms could confuse your search but less terms means more to look through. unfortunately everything from here would be guesswork. if it’s not in quotes, google will include results that are a match for synonyms and/or different tenses. let’s say my search is: tumblr taehyung “yandere” reader fanfic die rescued you can tell i’ve chosen those words based off of the plot detail. from the term ‘rescued’, google could give me results for ‘saved’ (synonym) or ‘rescue’ (word tense variation). click through the google pages and scan through your results. if the google summaries seem like they could be a match, check it out. if not, try a different search. from that search, i found:

it seems like a potential match since it’s a yandere taehyung fic involving another member, so i skim through the fic and check the details (reader is involved in a life or death situation and is saved by taehyung, fic is not a oneshot). this fic is only a suggestion as it’s possible this isn’t the right fic. from there we would ask for confirmation/denial, and unfortunately a lot of fics get left as pending. if your fic is pending, PLEASE let us know if it’s correct or not!

*edit: this fic was not the fic the anon was looking for, but we’ve received a potential fic suggestion from another anon. if this was your ask, please check back in!

example 7: you remember the plot and details, but you don’t remember the pairing

this might be tough since the pairing really helps narrow the search results down, but it’s not a deal breaker if you have enough unique keywords.

the fic relevant parts are highlighted. based off of that, you would know the following: pairing: jungkook/?(taehyung/hoseok/jimin) platform: ao3 au/genre: soulmate (red string), demons(?) plot: jungkook can manipulate his string, jungkook cuts his string, jin and namjoon are in a relationship, jungkook gets sick at jin and namjoon’s house, alex(?) is a demon(?), jungkook gets tricked by alex(?)

lots of information so lots of potential searches, but unfortunately a lot of unsurety. the concrete words here are going to be ‘jungkook’, ‘soulmate’, and ‘red string’, but everything else is up in the air. it’s even more complicated because it’s an ao3 fic and like i said before, google gets weird with ao3.

my first search for this would be: jungkook fanfic “soulmate” “red string” “alex” note that i did not include the other half of the pairing in my search terms. if you want to take a guess for the pairing you can (i would have guessed taehyung because taekook is the most popular pairing for jungkook on ao3), but it’s best not to take too many leaps in logic from the very start. i usually save that for the end when i’m just trying my luck with different searches. i also chose not to include the platform in this search in case it was crossposted and could be found elsewhere. the initial search does not provide any promising results. after that i might try searches like: jungkook fanfic “soulmate” “red string” “manipulate” jungkook fanfic “soulmate” “red string” “alex” jungkook fanfic “red string” manipulate sick jungkook fanfic “red string” “soulmate” demon but unfortunately the fic doesn’t turn up for these either. now we’ve got to start guessing. i won’t lie, this is pretty difficult. i typically try to think about how the fic might be written/consider the most obvious or common way for them to say something and make guesses from that. i might try something like: jungkook fanfic “soulmate” “won this round” that doesn’t work, so i try: jungkook fanfic "cut his string" "soulmate" from that i get this:

looks like it could be the fic, so i skim through it for the details in the description and it is! obviously this will not always work, but sometimes you’ll get lucky.

example 8: you remember a quote (word for word)

the success of finding a fic based on a quote is dependent on how accurately you remember it. if the quote is unique to the story and you know the exact wording, you have a very high chance of being able to find it! *if you DO NOT know an EXACT quote, this probably will not help. i would advise searching using your other details instead of a partial quote because misremembering even a few words will ruin a quote search.

the fic relevant parts are highlighted. based off of that, you would know the following: pairing: jungkook/reader au/genre: college, f2l plot: jungkook asks reader for a pencil, reader remembers him from high school, jungkook remembers reader from kindergarten, reader defended jungkook when he was bullied for his knockoff ninja turtle shirt

lots of information here, but what stands out is the quotes! it’s SO specific that it would be surprising if other fics had them. assuming you didn’t misremember the phrasing, you 100% want to use quotation marks for this. my first google search would be: jungkook “it’s morphine time” bts fanfic tumblr

as we thought, there it is! alternatively you could have used the other quote (the search would have been jungkook “it’s morphin time” bts fanfic tumblr) and found it as well.

example 9: you remember lots of plot but no unique keywords

this kind of ask probably won’t be found through google searching (or if it is, there is a LOT of guesswork involved). hopefully the community remembers it or one of the admins will read it somewhere and recognize it (i’m always on the lookout for old asks!), but unfortunately google isn’t your friend this time.

the fic relevant parts are highlighted. based off of that, you would know the following: pairing: jungkook/reader au: established relationship, cheating plot: reader is dating taehyung or jimin, jungkook is dating someone, reader goes to taehyung/jimin’s apartment to give them food and sees jungkook in the hallway, jungkook’s girlfriend is in taehyung/jimin’s apartment, jungkook and reader sit outside and eat the food that was supposed to be for taehyung/jimin and jungkook’s girlfriend, taehyung/jimin and jungkook’s gf leave the apartment and see jungkook and reader together, taehyung/jimin is pushed back by jungkook

this is a very specific plot, but unfortunately there’s nothing concrete we can search for. these google searches would be all guessing, so i’ve tried variations such as: jungkook reader tumblr fanfic cheating "hallway" eating food jungkook reader tumblr fanfic "his girlfriend" eating food cheating jungkook reader tumblr fanfic "eating" "apartment" pushed and a lot of others, but none of those worked (as expected).

we’re still looking for this one so if anyone knows this fic or has other information please let us know!

JUST A REMINDER: please try all your search options BEFORE sending us an ask! i would recommend trying google first, then our tags, then the search bar for our blog, and if all of those don’t work, THEN try us.

if you send us an ask, PLEASE GIVE US ALL THE DETAILS. it doesn’t matter if it’s super long or you think the detail might not help, the more the better. maybe we might end up not needing everything you sent, but it increases your chances of the fic being found and helps us confirm what you’re looking for. so assuming you really want to reread it, tell us everything you know! if you aren’t sure what to write, you can check the ‘be detailed’ section of the tips for the best way to write an ask.

hopefully this cleared up some things about googling :)

#info

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miacutie · 4 years

Text

Fanfiction or Reality?

AO3 LINK

Wei Wuxian discovers a fanfiction site about him and his best friend/classmate Lan Wangji.

As much as it horrifies him, one of the stories catches his attention.

They're whispering again.

Wei Wuxian's eyes narrow as he sees Nie Huaisang and Jiang Cheng talking against the lockers in hushed tones. They’d been doing this a lot recently, and it was starting to get suspicious. Actually now that he thinks about it, a lot of people at school have been doing this around him as well.

Honestly he just wanted to go home already after gym, but he may as well get to the bottom of this once and for all.

'No way, that's my brother!'

'Crazy right? Check out how many views there are.'

'Gross, I don't want to see Lan Wangji and my brother shacking it up in any form!'

‘Excuse me, what?’ Wei Wuxian says loudly. They jump at the sudden interruption, and Nie Huaisang quickly hides his phone behind his back.

‘Nothing.’

‘Nothing my ass, what’s this about me and Lan Zhan?’ He moves over to his friends craning his neck to have a look.

‘I don’t know! Really!’ Nie Huaisang babbles, still moving his phone out of reach every time Wei Wuxian tries to swipe at it.

‘Ugh, just show him.’ Jiang Cheng groans, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration. ‘Then maybe they’ll stop denying it and cut out the obnoxious pining.’

Wei Wuxian finally manages to grab the phone, only to be greeted by a website. A fan site…?

He scrolls through it and regrets it immediately. There’s dozens, no multiple pages worth of short stories. Short stories of him and Lan Zhan. Him and his best friend doing unspeakable things to each other.

‘W-what…’ Wei Wuxian says weakly. The site even has a gallery, full of photos taken from different perspectives of him and Lan Zhan hanging out together.

A photo of him leaning on Lan Wangji’s desk, chatting. Another picture of him clinging onto Lan Wangji’s sleeve. Lan Zhan helping him tie up his hair with his custom red scrunchie. A photo of him getting piggybacked when he got a twisted ankle at the school carnival. Even a photo of him fast asleep on Lan Zhan’s shoulder.

‘What is this!?’ He chokes, thrusting the screen in Jiang Cheng’s face. ‘Why are people writing things and taking photos of me and Lan Zhan?’ He’s totally dumbstruck. ‘I mean I can understand if people made a site for Lan Zhan, but why am I in it too?’

‘Calm down.’ His brother gingerly pushes the phone back at him. ‘Looks like the girls in your class started it, and things got a little out of hand.’

‘A little? Why did no one tell me this earlier?!’

‘We were afraid of your reaction.’ Nie Huaisang admits. ‘Can I have my phone back now?’

Wei Wuxian hands the phone back to him, feeling betrayed. How could his friends do this to him?

‘You guys can NOT show this to Lan Zhan! He’ll 1000% stop being friends with me if he knows this is how everyone thinks of us!’ He whines, distraught. ‘You guys KNOW how long it took just for him to stop seeing me as his enemy!’

‘Chill out, we won’t endanger your relationship with your precious ‘Lan Zhan.’ Jiang Cheng drones, deadpan.

‘Hey, only I get to call him that! You don’t have the privilege!’

‘It’s because you talk like that is why there’s a website.’ Nie Huaisang supplies unhelpfully.

‘Hey!’

---

When he gets home that night, he types the url into his laptop and goes straight to the fan website.

Wei Wuxian scrolls through the page, stopping to read a story here and there. Some were terribly out of character, like having Lan Zhan date girls to make him jealous, or Wei Ying throwing Lan Zhan aside after a stuttered love confession. However some are quite cute, like coffee dates or movie nights that he could see them doing on a usual weekend.

The top fic there had a shocking 10,000 views. Wei Wuxian knew there weren't even half of that many students in the school, let alone reading a story about him and Lan Wangji!

'Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation.' He reads aloud. It was by some author called WangXian. They even had ship names now?

Skimming through the story, it seemed to be set in ancient China, with them being something called ‘cultivators.’ It even had his friends featured in it, from differing clans and sects all coming to study in a place called the Cloud Recesses.

It was pretty well written, he had to give them that. He even laughed when the Wei Wuxian in the story pranks Lan Wangji with porn, as it definitely sounded like something he had done when they were kids.

But as he kept reading he felt himself get steadily more invested in the plot, and the rich detail the author had put into creating that world. It was actually really good, he could totally picture it becoming a live action drama or movie.

Wei Wuxian had almost forgotten that it was supposed to be a romantic fanfic about him and his best friend until the kiss.

He freezes reading it, all of fictional Lan Wangji's romantic feelings and lust as he forces the fictional version of him against a tree. It starts to get hot and heavy, getting into detail about-

Slam!

He slams the laptop lid shut, embarrassed.

No way! No way. This wasn't a thing. Him and Lan Zhan, they were bros, homies if you will.

Wei Wuxian could picture the distaste if Lan Zhan ever caught him reading this. His delicate features would furrow and his eyes would go icy and the curve of his soft lips would-

Nope.

He flops himself sideways and pulls the covers over his head. The laptop charging light blinks back at him, almost teasingly.

Squeezing his eyes shut, he wills sleep to come.

He is greeted the next day by Lan Wangji, waiting for him at his garden gate as always. Lan Zhan frowns slightly, cocking an eyebrow at his dark eye bags and dishevelled hair.

'Oh this? I didn't get much sleep last night, ahah..'

Of course he couldn't. Wei Wuxian had given into temptation and continued reading after ten minutes of rolling around in anguish.

Just one more chapter he had reasoned, and before he knew it he had marathoned the entire fic until it was 3am. Haggard, he had clicked the next chapter only to find out that he was up to date. That couldn’t be it! Where was the rest of it? He needed to know what happened next.

Checking the date, it had been updated last Thursday, meaning there probably won’t be a chapter out anytime soon.

After a loud frustrated groan and Jiang Cheng banging on the wall for him to shut up, he had created an account and written a very enthusiastic review.

fluterave420_6969

This fic was BRILLIANT!!! You should be a famous author!!! Now of course Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji are friends and NOTHING more but the rest of it was great!!! You wrote their interaction really well

ヽ( ´ ▽ ` ) ﾉ

Plz plz update soon!!!

Well of course he couldn't tell Lan Zhan about all that.

'Don’t worry, I'll just grab a coffee and I'll be fine and dandy.' Wei Wuxian chirps, flattening his hair down as they walk side by side to school.

Lan Wangji is silent as usual on their morning walks. Wei Wuxian chances a side glance at his elegant profile.

He's pretty, he thinks vaguely. Well obviously he's always known, but like, in a platonic way. Like how one would find a lotus flower beautiful, or a sunset.

The people in school definitely knew. They would always talk about Lan Zhan being as beautiful as a sculpted piece of jade, but if you looked at him his gaze would turn you into stone. Didn’t stop the girls from pursuing him though. He had once borrowed Lan Zhan’s phone to make a call, and that man’s conversation history was filled top to bottom with thirsty girls in his DMs. All the messages were ignored of course, the only messages being replied to being his brother, Lan Qiren and of course Wei Ying.

He had been thrilled, bragging about it to Jiang Cheng (‘I don’t care.’) and Wen Ning (‘Oh good for you!’) before adding a bunch of heart kaomojis next to his name in Lan Zhan’s phone. Surprisingly Lan Zhan hadn’t changed it since then.

Soon it was lunchtime and as usual they would eat lunch together under the sycamore tree outside. It was always their spot, since this tree had the exact right amount of shade and sometimes this wild rabbit would come into the garden. Lan Zhan would leave behind bits of carrot, trying hard to win its trust. Wei Ying thought it was cute, so they had been sitting out there everyday for the past 6 months hoping to catch a glimpse of the furry black rabbit.

Today he didn’t feel hungry, deciding to save the lunch Jiang Yanli made for him for another time. Yawning, he wants to ask Lan Zhan to borrow his lap, but after what he read last night it might be too weird.

Suddenly he hears a giggle behind him.

There was a group of girls nearby, who after making eye contact with him quickly whipped their heads back pretending to eat their lunch.

Usually he would assume they were part of Lan Zhan’s fan club, but now he suspects they had different intentions.

‘Eat.' Lan Wangji interrupts his thoughts, holding a lotus piece out of his own meal with his chopsticks.

Tearing his eyes away from the girls, he shakes his head. 'No no!' Wei Wuxian flaunters. He can hear the girls muffled squeals, and was that a camera shutter? 'You really don't have to! I'm not that hungry anyway.'

'Wei Ying.' He fixes him with a disapproving stare, pinning him down with it. Wei Wuxian really doesn’t want to make more fodder for these girls fantasies. He always wanted to be popular with the girls, but not like this.

Reluctantly, he gingerly takes the lotus piece in his mouth from Lan Zhans chopsticks. He’s halfway through chewing before he hears a whisper that on a usual day he wouldn’t have noticed.

'He's feeding him!! That's so domestic!'

Wei Wuxian chokes on his lotus piece, coughing loudly to Lan Wangji’s alarm. He hits him on the back a few times, until his face returns to its usual colour.

'Lan Zhan, you really shouldn’t encourage them...' He says weakly.

‘Hmn?’

‘Never mind…’

So, here he was in after school detention again. He had forgotten to submit his homework after being distracted last night and Lan Qiren had given him a verbal beating for it. Luckily the teacher had refused to give up his afterschool hours to supervise and trusted Lan Zhan who had volunteered to watch over him instead.

Lan Zhan had silently joined him at his desk, quietly reading some novel as Wei Wuxian mulled over a math problem. To be honest, he couldn't concentrate; his mind was always drifting to the fan website. As much as he was disturbed by its existence, he couldn’t deny how much he had enjoyed that one story he had read. Was there an update yet? Chancing it, he brings out his phone behind his textbook to refresh the page.

To his shock, the fic's view count had increased by a few hundred from last night. There were a couple of new comments too and he scrolls down to read them.

Swordbois172

This update was so good!! I can really feel the love between them <3333 Such burning passion!

3000rules

Actually I saw hanguang-jun and wei wuxian having lunch together today :O they were feeding each other! So domestic.

BewareofIncenseBurners

Dude, respect their privacy. Do you really want to get perma banned?

3000rules

Shut up, you were there too!! srsly who died and made you mod

Rabbitsalesperson

Lol get real if we respected their privacy we wouldn't even be here lol X___x let's hope they never discover this dumpster fire.

>Comment Removed<

WenNing

What a great chapter!

Wait. Wen Ning?! What was Wen Ning doing in the comment section? Also, who uses their real name on the internet?

'Wei Ying. Pay attention.'

He jumps in his seat, guilty that he had been caught reading about them in front of the person himself.

'Aww but it's so boring! I can't concentrate.'

'You were on your phone.'

'I, well, started reading something recently. A novel.' He says, settling for a half lie. I mean fanfiction counts as a novel, right?

Lan Wangji's eyebrow raises, and he tilts his head to look at Wei Wuxian's phone.

'No!'

He almost throws the phone out the window in his rush to turn it off. Lan Zhan looks at him, bewildered.

'Sorry! I was lying, it was porn.'

Lan Wangji blinks at him before settling into a deadpan expression. Rolling his eyes, he goes back to his book.

This scene felt familiar.

'Lan Zhan. Lan Zhaan. I'm sorry, I'll work diligently.' He whines, genuinely apologetic. 'I know you waited here for me to keep me company when you could've just gone home.'

His best friend's golden eyes soften just a tad.

'If you understand, finish your work quickly.'

'Okay!'

---

They’re having another one of their movie nights, watching some drama at Wei Wuxian’s place. He had his head on Lan Zhan’s shoulder, trying to fight sleep that was overcoming him.

His mind was drifting over to that cave scene in the story, and he tries to picture his best friend in white robes and an elegant headband playing the guqin. Lan Zhan was pretty enough so it would probably work. The one thing he couldn’t picture though was what the song he sang to the Wei Ying in the fanfiction sounded like.

Actually he wasn’t sure what Lan Zhan’s singing voice sounded like at all. He had always shot down his invitations for karaoke, but that was most likely because his other friends were there too.

‘Hey, Lan Zhan. I’ve never heard you sing.’ He really wanted to hear it now.

‘...’

‘C’mon singgg for meeeeeee~ Your voice probably sounds like one of an angel, and I would have never known! We could make your c-pop idol debut!’

‘No.’

He pouts, ‘Okay fine, you probably sound like a dying rat anyway.’

‘...’

‘Hmmn then again Lan Zhan is so perfect at everything, I bet you’d sound good even as a rat.’ Wei Wuxian murmurs sleepily. He slips off his shoulder to lean into Lan Zhan’s lap. Lan Wangji adjusts himself so they were in a more comfortable position.

‘Don’t forget me when you’re famous okay? I could even be your backing instrumental. We could go to the same university, join the same company, live in the same apartment....’

He thinks he can see Lan Zhan nod slightly from his shuttering vision.

‘Even buried together in the same grave!’ Wei Wuxian jokes, a smile stretched across his face. He could imagine the field day those girls would have if they could hear him now.

But he’s glad that it was just the two of them, in Wei Ying’s little room with no one to take photos or question his relationship with Lan Zhan. I mean he’s seen k-pop compilations of the members doing way more affectionate stuff than what he was doing right now. Jiang Cheng totally had it all wrong, since he hadn’t experienced the magic of true friendship.

‘We’ll stay together forever, yeah?’

‘Mn.’ Lan Wangji responds, carding his fingers through Wei Wuxian’s hair.

He laughs a little, grateful at having someone like him in his life. Yawning, he falls asleep on Lan Zhan’s lap, just like that.

#the untamed #wangxian #mdzs #lan wangji #wei wuxian #mo dao zu shi

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solesurvivorkat · 4 years

Text

‘Six’ Sentence Sunday/Monday WIP meme

Tagged by @noonvvraith, ty hunny! :-D <3 (I’m sure you won’t mind that I combined both meme tags, hence the quotes around ‘Six’, lol)

...SO. As I told my Discord group, I must have lost my mind with this whole pandemic thing. I MUST have - why ELSE would I ever consider starting a THIRD fanfic, especially when I’m so far behind in updating my other two? (...Seriously - still haven’t given up on them yet, I swear.)

Welp, I have no idea why, but one of my favorite movies, ‘While You Were Sleeping’, has been in my head lately. Couldn’t shake it off. So... after much (sooooo much) debating, I figured any writing/inspiration was better than none - and I decided to start a ‘Far Cry 5′ no-cult AU fic based off of this fluffy little ‘90s romantic comedy.

...I don’t expect a ton of people to know this movie... and whether they do or not, I don’t expect a ton of people to read this fic. I’ll be a little disappointed if no one reads it, I won’t lie, but... this is something that I thought would be fun to work on, so at the end of the day I’m doing this more for me than for anyone else (...no offense meant, lol).

For those that do know the movie though, I’ll say this: while the main plot is going to mimic that of the movie, it’s not going to be exact. I plan on incorporating a ‘non-cult FC5 touch’ into the story. Some details will be changed (both from FC5 canon and the movie’s), there will be slight ‘fudging’ of details, and I just ask that if something seems ‘factually wrong’ or ‘out of place’, to please bear with me. I will do my best to entertain and not disappoint, I promise. The main pairing in this fic will be my FC5 OC Sarah Rook, and of course, my boy John.

Without further ado (and sorry for the long intro):

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

‘I Need to Tell You’ (coming very soon to AO3)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I was growing up in Connecticut, my dad used to say, ‘Life doesn’t always turn out the way you plan.’ I used to think he was referring to him and my mom, who had died when I was only a little girl. It never occurred to me until I was much older that he was actually referring to MY life.

He tried to be brave, always look happy around me... but I could tell he really missed her. My own memories of her were a bit hazy, so I’d question him about her every so often. One time I asked my dad when he knew he was TRULY in love with my mom. He got this big smile on his face as he thought for a moment, then replied, ‘Sarah, your mother gave me a special gift. She gave me the world.’

...Actually, it was a globe with a light in it. But... for the romantic that he was, it might as WELL have been the world.

Well, the first time I saw HIM, he didn’t exactly give me the world - it was a train ticket stub (...here in remote Montana - where I live NOW - we don’t have those fancy automated ticket machines like more densely-populated areas). But... I looked forward to it at work, every single day. He started coming to my station counter between 8:01 and 8:15am every morning, Monday through Friday, and he was just... what was he? ...Mysterious, I think is the word I’d use to describe him. Mysterious, yet... alluring.

Tall, definitely at least six feet. In his late 30s, maybe early 40s based on the slight crinkles beginning to form on his face. Imposing but not over-the-top build. Always wore a green camouflage army jacket. I’d catch a glimpse of the name tape every so often - ‘SEED’, above his right upper pocket. Undercut hairstyle (buzzed short on the sides, longer on top), moustache, and beard the color of rust. Some small scars and rashes on his face... this man has definitely seen some battle.

He’d lumber over, combat boots thumping with every step, drop the ticket stub on my counter, and continue on to the train platform. We didn’t make eye contact often - and in the brief moments in which we DID... there was just something about those blue eyes of his. I felt like he had a lot of interesting stories to tell.

We’ve- well, we’ve never actually SPOKEN, but... I know someday we will. I just know it. And someday... I’ll find a way to introduce myself, and it’s gonna be great - just like my handsome, mysterious soldier.

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crowsent · 4 years

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👶,⭐,💘, and💻. Love you!!

thank you for ask anon! writer ask game is here if yall wanna send in something. still taking asks for these btw

👶- advice for new writers =

yall this is hella fucking generic but PRACTISE. theres a reason almost literally every writer on tumblr gives the advise of “practise practise practise” and that reason is it works. practise doesnt mean ‘oh just write bc youll automatically get better over time’ it means ‘write bc if you dont, you wont figure out what you need to improve.’ did yall know that i literally had no sentence variation in the past? i started every sentence with [character name] or [character pronoun] and i didnt realise until i was 15/16 and i only realised bc i started writing a lot.

i think there’s a fear of failure with new writers. there’s this lingering doubt of “what if its not good?” and boy howdy i will answer that question right fucking now. it wont be good. when i compare my current work to my earlier work, my earlier work sucked fucking shit. i spelled soldier with a fucking ‘j’ and i had no idea what the hell a point of view was. and thats okay. whoever tells you that youre going to perfect writing is a fucking liar. there is no perfecting writing. 20 years from now, imma look at the writing from today and im gonna think it sucks shit. writing is a process. its a craft. you get better and better over time and the way you get better is by experimenting w different styles, different genres, different ways of writing.

and the only way you can experiment and improve is through practise. in video games, especially rpgs (which are my favourite kind of video games), you struggle in the early game. youre at a low level, you dont have good equipment, you have a hard time moving to the next area. but the only way you progress is by grinding, gaining levels, and getting stronger. same w writing. if youre a level 1 writer, just starting out, no idea what to do, just experiment. fuck around a bit. write crackships, write rarepairs, write niche self-indulgent reader/character fics. at the end of the day, you should write for yourself. its good and cool if other people like your stuff and validate all your hard work, but at the end of the day, the one who should enjoy your writing the most is yourself.

you WILL mess up and you WILL struggle, but thats the only way you can improve. i struggle with pacing the most. still do. but others might have pacing down pat and struggle instead with word choice or pov or something else. cant figure out where you need to improve if you dont write, so just practise and worry about all the fine print later

⭐️- how do you get your inspiration? =

this is definitely not universal, but i just sit on my bed, close my eyes, and meditate. cycle through all my emotions and thoughts and filter them out. then i just toss everything out the damn window. like. id just meditate for a while, focus on breathing, on experiencing the present, picture a field and a tree and myself and breathe. thoughts fly by and i let them happen but dont focus on it.

meditating gives me some semblance of emotional control bc i normally have none, and it gives me kind of this space. this safe space that only exists for me and me alone. so i use that space to let the world drift away. just me and my thoughts and sometimes, those thoughts end up being good writing ideas. but i usually meditate for a set amount of time. like 15 minutes or 30 minutes so i dont write until i finish meditating.

then when i get out of my headspace, i open up my laptop and see what i remember. thinking too hard about something causes it to muddy up. same with art. in digital art, artists flip the canvas to refresh their eyes, see if there’s anything weird or wonky about the illustration that they normally dont see bc theyve gotten used to it. flipping the canvas is like giving our eyes a jumpstart and lets us see what we could do better. in traditional art, its turning the canvas this way and that or repositioning yourself. meditating is like that. a break. a cleanse. a kind of pause where you dont think about anything and just try to process what you already have. you relax and kind of let yourself float down a river of thoughts and sometimes, a fish would jump out of that river and youd go “hey, thats a good idea. i should try that” so when you get out of the river, youre refreshed and ready to go.

same principle with showers. more ideas come to you in the shower when you dont have anything to write with bc youre not thinking about it. youre not focusing on finding inspiration or motivation so ideas naturally flow through you. you know that feeling when you want to do x then someone comes along and says “hey you should do x” and suddenly all motivation to do x leaves? same w your brain. focus too much on “i should be writing” or “i want inspiration” and its never gonna come. just let things happen. at least, thats how i do it. some people might get inspiration by reading or watching tv. everyones different so if thats not what works out for you, dont feel pressured to try my method

💘- what’s your favorite AU? Least favorite? =

magic au. specifically fantasy au set in like a pre-modern era. shows like avatar where theres all this magic and fantastical beasts and so on and so forth. semi-modern like six of crows and nevernight are great too. i want that magic to be woven into people’s lives. harry potter is okay but there’s like this separation between magic and muggle. there’s this feeling of “magic” but like as a tool. like a spoon or a gun or a shovel. i want magic au’s that are INTEGRATED with the world its set in.

like in atla, earth kingdom people have trains they move with bending while fire nation people have machines powered by heat and steam. both correspond to their bending and makes sense for the world they live in. but if your plot is like harry potter and its less worldbuilding and more action, then there’s this book series called seasons rising (read it. so good) where there’s a bunch of spells but the spells have character. the people using the spells GIVE it character and it feels much more intimate. pokemon does the whole fantasy mixed w reality better. give two trainers the exact same pokemon and by the time that pokemon reaches lvl 50, its gonna have a different moveset, different fight style, etc bc it was shaped by the world and people around it. i like harry potter but tbh it could have been so much better

for the least favourite au, it’s A/B/O i dont like the whole “omegas are only good for breeding hurr durr” and “alphas are violent and aggressive and cant control themselves around omegas” thing and it squicks me out. major squick. i read the original harry potter squick (THAT one. yeah. you know the one) and i still hate a/b/o more. i get why people like it, and there are one or two fics set in a/b/o au that i enjoy reading, but as a whole, i severely dislike a/b/o fics.

the themes are squick, the character dynamics get so messed up, and shipping dynamics (bc a/b/o fics usually have shipping) just get so blown out of proportion. there are so many a/b/o fics that turn ooc or the character interpretations radically change or something else. no hate against a/b/o fans bc yall are amazing for writing/drawing yalls au. there are things that you can only do in this setting and exploring those things can be incredibly fun for people, but for me personally, its not an au i like to visit.

💻- three works of yours that are must reads =

i. dont know what fandom youre in anon or your genre preferences. so ill just rec you one fic for a different fandom each with kind of different genres. ts masterlist is on my side @hufflepuff-deceit and regular fanfic masterlist is on my writing blog @crownonymous

(BNHA) Viper. its my first serious attempt at fanfic in YEARS and its my baby. currently has 7 chapters, i havent updated it in a while bc im hyperfocused on ts rn, but i love it to bits. its just all of my fav bnha fics crammed into one fic. quirkless kind of villain izuku with stain as a mentor as they work together to bring light to the injustices of hero society and where bakugos bullying has visible and long-lasting repercussions? sign me the fuck up. you can read it on ao3 HERE bc its not on tumblr. kind of fast-paced, has a lot more action scenes than anything else ive written. heavy plot-wise but has a lot of humour and comedy to break things up

(Kimetsu no Yaiba) I Pray To God He Hears You. not related to my other kny fic oleander which is a multichap retelling au. iptghhy is a standalone one-shot and kind of a character study on one giyuu tomioka. i love him so much. giyuu is my baby and i adore him. so of course i wrote a sad fic focusing on him. well technically, the fic focuses on giyuu AND his relationships. SPOILERS for chapters 130 and 131 of the manga. focuses mostly on giyuu and sabito, but there’s a fair bit of giyuu and tanjiro and urokodaki. you can read it HERE bc this is also not on tumblr. also deals with heavy things but more emotion-wise since it doesnt have that much of a plot. loss. grief. moving on. survivors guilt. that kind of stuff. very sad. hurt but with comfort, especially at the end.

(Sanders Sides) Logan’s Birthday Fic: Logicality. just what the title says. i wrote 5 different fics and published them all on logans bday but the logicality one received the most feedback and honestly? the cutest of the bunch. its gonna be crossposted onto ao3 but for now, you can read it HERE on my ts sideblog. theres no plot since its literally just domestic and relationship fluff. and puns. patton is in the fic, theres gonna be puns. nothing but good things and warm feelings bc logan deserves it.

thank you so much for such interesting asks anon! i enjoyed answering these. have a lovely day!

#crowsas answers #kny #bnha #sanders sides

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