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#i refuse to sleep on the same floor as her at this point LMAO she dont make me feel safe in there
todayisafridaynight · 5 months
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yagami should get his back snapped in half like a toothpick if he wanna fuckin sleep on couches exclusively might as well be doin the same amount of damage
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teamatsumu · 10 months
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Temptation
Summary:  After all, he has never been able to say no to her.
Pairing: Ishida Uryuu x Inoue Orihime
Word Count: 3,775
Warnings: Angst, Smut, Adultery, Post canon, swearing., you have been warned!
A/N: This is a murky piece lmao. Problematic content, so don’t come for me. It’s fiction!
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The nurse’s foot was tap, tap, tapping on the marble floor, the noise ringing in the quiet of the room. Uryuu was sure it was unintentional, but it didn’t help his concentration at all. He didn't want to reprimand her, though. He wasn't sure he had the energy to. He blinked and pursed his lips, focusing on the file in front of him.
“Everything looks fine to me,” he looked up at the nurse, who looked like she wanted to be anywhere but here. Uryuu couldn’t blame her. If he remembered correctly, she was on hour 14 of an 18 hour shift. “And she wants to leave?”
The nurse nodded. “Her attendants are in the waiting room. She already has her bags packed.”
Uryuu hummed and closed the file, holding it up for the nurse to take it from him. “Then discharge her. Write her a follow up for two days from now. Make sure a resident signs off on that. Then she’s good to go.”
The nurse nodded politely before leaving the office, the door shutting softly behind her. Uryuu sighed and leaned back in his chair, taking his glasses off to rub his eyes. It provided little relief to his burning eyelids. He stretched his legs beneath his desk, hoping to abate the building tension in them. Again, it did almost nothing to improve his situation. He knew what he really needed was a good night's sleep.
He wasn't sure he was going to get it, though.
It's not like Uryuu had a lot going on at the hospital. He was a consultant now, not a resident. He could afford to step away and have his juniors run the show for a bit. After years and years of hard work, he was finally at a point in his life where he didn't have to struggle just to keep up with his career. At 30, he was finally qualified enough to take a breather.
Life wasn't that kind to him though. It never had been. Why would it start now? One problem always replaced the next, and this new problem came in the form of wide, brown eyes and a soft little smile.
Dammit. He was thinking of her again. He looked at the clock hanging on the far wall and mentally cursed at himself. Ten minutes. That's how long she had stayed out of his mind. He should be proud. It was a record. But he had wanted to stay strong for longer.
He wondered what she was doing right now. Midday meant Kazui was at school and Ichigo was at work. And she didn't work at the bakery on Wednesdays. So she'd be home. Alone.
Shut the fuck up.
The voice in his head was cruel and sharp, but it was what he needed. He couldn't afford to think of her. Couldn't afford to imagine her home at her lonesome, knowing he could head over right now and be uninterrupted for a few hours, at least. He knew where these thoughts led. Sooner or later, her voice would ring in his ears if he let these images run free in his head. Quiet little whimpers, biting at her rosy lips to keep the noises at bay, looking at him with those big eyes loaded with unshed tears as the pleasure kept building and building…
Fuck.
Uryuu nearly jumped out of his skin when a soft knock on his door sounded in the quiet of the room. He bit the inside of his cheek, scowling at himself for his blasphemous thoughts. He needed to get a grip. He straightened in his chair and put his glasses back on.
"Come in."
And in poked a head of burnt orange hair, the very subject of his crude fantasies just a minute ago.
No.
"Ishida-kun," her voice made his heart squeeze. "Can I come in?"
Of course you can. Have I ever refused you?
"Inoue-san, of course. Please." He stood up in courtesy, watching her open the door just enough to slip in and shut it behind her. Uryuu froze in place.
She was wearing the same skirt as last time.
It had to be intentional. Inoue-san was dense sometimes but she wasn't an idiot. She knew what she was doing. To him. But he had to believe she didn't have a clue, because she was humming and pulling a chair back to sit on, right across his desk.
Shakily, Uryuu sat down as well.
"Are you okay? Did you want something? You usually text before you show up." Or when you want me to come over. When your husband isn't enough for you. When you need me to make your pain better.
She shook her head, giving him a big smile and placing her hands neatly on her lap. "I was just out running some errands. I thought I'd drop by."
Liar. Uryuu knew instantly. There were no errands. It was just him.
He nodded anyway, letting the corners of his lips curl up. "Well, I'm glad you did. You know you're always welcome."
Her eyes held gratitude, some of the tension leaving her shoulders. It made Uryuu stiffen slightly. Had she been nervous? Had she been scared he would turn her away? His hold on the arms of his chair tightened. Did she really believe he would ever do that? Did she think that at any point, he would reject her?
She was all he had.
No. No. He had promised himself. No more. He couldn't do this to her. He couldn't do this to Ichigo. The few times it happened was already one time too many. Surely, he would not be reduced to this again. This was immoral. It was reprehensible. To have an affair, right under her husband and child's nose-
Her smile had wavered, lessened, her eyes boring straight into his. Her hands were no longer still, fingers wringing together in nervousness. The room was silent, the only noise coming from the ticking of the wall clock. The air felt charged. Heavy.
It was like the very walls were holding their breath.
"Why are you really here, Orihime?" His voice was low, as if he was afraid to disrupt the stillness of the space around him.
"You know why." Her voice was a mere whisper, her eyebrows creasing.
"We can't."
"Why not?"
"Because-" He grit his teeth. How could she ask him that? "Because you're married."
She looked down at her hands, her hair falling gently over her face. "That didn't stop you last time."
Uryuu screwed his eyes shut, teeth clenched so hard it made his jaw ache.
"Or the time before that."
He stood up slowly. Every muscle in his body protested the action. He wasn't even tired, yet he felt like he was weighed down by lead. She had stopped talking instantly, but she kept her gaze on her hands, twisting and pulling at her fingers to calm her nerves. He could read her so easily. She was an open book to him.
He walked around the desk until he stood before her, leaning down and placing his hands on the arms of her chair. At this proximity, the scent of her shampoo invaded his nose, making his eyelids flutter. She seemed to dig her chin further into her chest as he drew nearer.
"Look at me."
She didn't. She kept her stare steadily on her lap. Uryuu sighed, defeated. He knew exactly what he was going to do. Every molecule in his body screamed for him to do it. She was here, still and pliant on a chair in his office, offering herself to him, right within his reach. At the end of the day, he was just a man. Weak willed in front of this woman. A slave to his desires.
There was nothing he desired more than her.
He leaned his head down and nudged his forehead gently with hers. He felt her intake of breath as her head lifted up just marginally. Tilting his face, he slotted his lips with hers.
It was intense and hard from the very start. There was no room for soft, passionate love when their time together was already so limited and riddled with guilt and sin. As much as Uryuu would like to go slow, he couldn’t. One look at her was enough to drive him insane. Here she sat, before him, ready for the taking. In a couple of hours from now, she would be home again. With the man she shared a last name with. A last name he would never acknowledge. To him, she was still Inoue-san.
There was no going slow. Uryuu was desperate.
His hand came up to cup the side of her head, pushing his lips harder against hers, eliciting the first little whimper from her throat. His tongue invaded her mouth immediately, feeling her own tentative movements. It nearly made him chuckle. She came to him, practically begging with unsaid words for him to fuck her. And yet, now she was the one being hesitant.
It just wouldn’t do.
He gripped both her arms tightly and hauled her up until she was on her feet, arms winding around her waist tightly and pulling her body flush against his. He knew she liked that, and he was validated by the sigh that escaped her lips. He swallowed the sound hungrily, feeling his core stir as every part of her body pressed and pulled along with his. Her hands had fisted the white lab coat he adorned, and it made him realize they were wearing too many clothes.
His heart ached again. They didn’t have time.
Their lips broke free for air, and Uryuu immediately descended to the soft, unmarked expanse of her neck. She was pliant and warm, the smell of morning dew and fresh, flowery detergent. Her hands, gentle as always, carded through his hair, scratching lightly at his scalp and sending a violent shiver down his spine. He nibbled at the skin just under her ear, knowing she could hide it with her hair. Her sounds became louder.
He was already undoing the buttons on her shirt, eager to feel more skin. He could feel himself hard and throbbing in anticipation, grinding into her hips for some form of relief. Once her shirt was pushed down her shoulders, he abandoned the kisses on her neck to lean back and look at her, and he wasn’t disappointed.
Her skin had flushed a beautiful rosy pink from her cheeks down to her neck. Her lips were swollen and red, her neck carrying a slight sheen from his treatment earlier. He cupped her breasts, hearing her keen at the contact, eyes fluttering shut. Fuck.
He pulled down the cups of her bra immediately, mouth descending on his right nipple to suck it into his mouth. The reaction was instant, back arching as she gasped, head thrown back. It lit a fire inside Uryuu that he hadn’t felt in a long time. This moment right here. This was the reason he still allowed himself to sin. It was shameful, yes. It was heinous. But when he had her trapped in his arms, tasting her flesh and hearing her pretty little sounds flood his ears, he couldn’t blame himself at all. She was the worst temptation. And he would always give in.
“Ishida-kun…” It was breathy and desperate. Uryuu could feel her fidget and rub her thighs together, begging for relief. He would give it to her. He would make sure she never craved anyone but him ever again.
It was times like these that Uryuu barely recognized himself.
His mouth left her nipple with a soft pop, straightening his back and peering down at the wanton expression on her face.
“What do you want, Orihime?” The same question. This time, with an entirely different undertone.
“You. All of you.” Her nails dug into his waist. She was staring at his lips. Uryuu couldn’t help his little smirk.
He turned her around and pushed between her shoulder blades until her front pressed into his office desk, her ass in the air. He didn’t leave her wanting for his touch however, leaning over to put his weight on her until she sighed. His lips brushed the shell of her ear.
“You dirty girl,” he whispered, hand running under her skirt and skimming up her thigh until he reached the apex. God, she was soaked. And it was all because of him. This time, he huffed out a small laugh. “Walking all the way here and giving yourself to me like this. Do you want me that badly?”
She pushed against his fingers, trying to make him rub her where she needed it the most. “Yes.” Her voice was small, and it sounded almost ashamed. But Uryuu knew better. She wasn’t ashamed. She was desperate. His cock twitched.
He slid his hand up further until he felt the waistband of her panties, tugging them down the swell of her ass and off her thighs. They hit the floor around her feet with a soft plop. The next second, his fingertips were brushing at her burning center, not wasting a second before he pushed two fingers into her down to the knuckles.
She gasped and moaned loudly. Uryuu brought his left hand up to her mouth, to clamp it shut, nudging his nose against her cheek.
“Do you want to get caught?” He asked. She shook her head slightly, hips twitching and walls clenching around him. He curled his fingers, watching her eyes roll up into her head. Tears coated her eyelids, not yet falling, but no worries. He’d have her crying in the next ten minutes or so.
Her quiet whimpers were drowned out by the sound of the filthy squelch Uryuu’s fingers made as he moved them in and out of her, spreading them apart to open her up. Not that he needed to do much. He’d fucked her just last week. She would’ve been fine even without the prep. But he couldn’t stop right then. He was too engrossed in watching her face, the tiny shifts in muscle at every movement he made. He could feel the palm of his hand get wet where it held her mouth shut. He pressed his crotch hard against her ass. She looked….. divine.
How ironic, considering what they were doing.
She gasped when his fingers left her abruptly, mouth free from his grip so she could take big, heaving breaths. The sound of his belt clinking and zipper pulling down had her stilling in anticipation. Uryuu lifted up her skirt, sighing at the sight. He ran a gentle finger up her skin, feeling the shiver that ran down her back. He lined himself up to her before leaning down, elbows resting on either side of her head. Her cheek was pressed to the desk, eyes looking up at him. Her expression was relaxed. She knew she was about to get what she wanted.
She gave him the tiniest smile when their eyes met. Uryuu pushed forward.
The relief was instant for both of them, moaning in unison. Uryuu felt his face scrunch up at the tight grip around him. Warm and hot and twitching. He didn’t stop until he had sunk all the way in, letting out a long, shuddering breath.
“How are you already this tight?” His voice sounded strangled. He heard her giggle and blinked his eyes open, watching the rose flush of her cheeks. Her hair was a mess, sprawled over the desk around her head like a halo. It made him smile too, bending his head forward to brush his lips against her temple. She sighed in contentment.
"Feeling better?" He joked, making her laugh more openly now. His tongue darted out to lick at her bottom lip. She hummed.
"Much."
He pulled out slowly before surging forward again, his skin meeting hers with a wet slap. Her smile disappeared.
"Uryuu…" God. Not his name. Not like this, unhindered, cracked and yearning. Uryuu groaned and started moving in earnest, unable to hold himself back any longer. He leaned his chest against her back and grabbed a tight hold on her hips, thrusting harder into her.
Uryuu’s head was swimming. He could no longer think straight.
Her voice gained a higher pitch, back arching at an angle that made him hit deeper into her. She clenched around him just right, making his rhythm stutter. He growled like a man possessed, hips smacking harshly between her thighs at a pace she simply couldn't keep up with. Her hands scrambled for purchase over the desk, gripping at the edges above her head for stability. Each deep thrust of his cock punched a mewl from her throat that she desperately tried to keep quiet, her cunt clenching down on him in a way that made him dizzyingly close to cumming.
No. Not yet. Not so soon. She'll go away if you do. She'll leave.
His thoughts were broken and muddled as they screamed at him. He wanted to listen to them so badly, but the delicious rub of her walls made it almost impossible to. In his hazy state, he realized she was stiffening up even more, tears streaking down her cheeks and hips jerking with every slam of his cock deep inside her. He felt a sick satisfaction wash over him.
"You gonna cum for me?” He growled in her ear, fist in her hair dragging her head around to look at him again. Nose to nose, eyes boring straight into hers, he saw her and all the need that overflowed within her, felt it in the way he split her open. His eyes were hooded and his sweating forehead pressed into hers to keep her eyes on him. "You love this don't you? Taking me like this and then going home, still sore from the feeling of my cock. I bet you think of me when he looks at you. I bet you wish it was me you were going home to."
He couldn’t believe the words leaving his mouth.
She almost sobbed as her hips twisted without rhythm, but it didn't matter. The plow of Uryuu's hips kept hers pinned to the desk, kept her from losing his pace, and that’s just how both of them liked it. “A-Ah, U-uryuu, y-yes--”
Uryuu's hand reached under her legs, finding her clit to rub harsh circles into. She mewled, forehead banging into the desk hard before every muscle in her body seized up.
"Cum," Uryuu could barely recognize his voice. "I can fucking feel it, baby. Cum, for me, c’mon, cum--" He tugged her head back, nerves firing across her scalp and making her eyes roll. The slick sound of her pussy was growing louder and wetter. He continued to fuck into her even when she clenched so tight it felt like he couldn’t possibly thrust back inside, feeling her ride her high. His pace didn't falter and his fingers didn't halt, dragging out her orgasm until she was mumbling incoherently into the wood of the desk, crying and trying to move away from his insistent fingers.
Uryuu shuddered against her and grunted. He pressed deep into her body and stopped, panting harshly. He rasped out a groan, long and low, against her sweating neck , hips stuttering, fingers massaging hard at her ass and thigh as he swirled his hips into the tight squeeze of her insides. Hot jets of his cum filled her, squelching louder now with each of his shaky thrusts. With every flex of his cock he panted, moaning at the end of each one while he pinned her down with all the weight of him and twitched his hips forward as deep as he could get, knowing she would have bruises due to the unforgiving edges of the desk.
Both of them stayed that way for what felt like hours, panting and writhing as the desk under them groaned harshly. He wedged an arm under her head, feeling her sweaty face press into the give of his muscle.
"Are you okay?" His voice was raspy.
She hummed and didn't say much more, nodding slightly and shifting her hips. He cursed softly into her shoulder blade, finally pulling out of her with a wet squelch that made his ears burn. He straightened up, feeling his back protest the action. Her skirt was pushed all the way up to her waist and he watched, mesmerized, as his cum dripped down the inside of her thighs.
"Ishida-kun," His gaze snapped up to hers, eyeing the deep red color on the apples of her cheeks. She was pouting a little, clearly embarrassed. "Don't- don't look."
Uryuu couldn't help the little laugh that escaped him, leaning down again to pepper small kisses all over her hot face, wrapping both his arms around her waist until her body felt like it was one with him.
"You are so cute, Inoue-san." He inhaled her wonderful, after-sex smell as he pulled her up straight. "I wish I could-"
He stopped.
The air in the room shifted immediately, and Uryuu knew he had just burst the little bubble they had created. He regretted it with every fiber of his being, because she was already going rigid again, arms twisting in his hold a bit. He knew what this meant. He knew what would happen now.
Somehow, despite doing this many times now, the ache didn’t seem to numb at all. In fact, it got worse.
He helped her clean up and dress herself, not meeting her eyes as he did the same. His mind was clearing again, as it always did after every such encounter. Now would come the regret and the longing, and the harsh internal lecture about how this was the last time, and that he would never do it again.
It was all delusion, of course. He knew that. As she gave him one last sweet kiss and told him she'd see him soon, he knew there was no way that this was the last time. They would see each other again in a few days, when either he cracked or she did, either here, at her own house, or the quaint little apartment Uryuu lived in, and they'd play the same game all over again. He would let himself be consumed by her. She would let him taint her body. He would fall asleep alone and exhausted. She would go home to her family and pretend she hadn’t seen him since high school. Rinse and repeat.
After all, he had never been able to say no to her.
--------------------------------------------
Let me know what you think! Requests are open.
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littlemisswolfie · 2 years
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Love your Mustang Family AU, so much!!! I was wondering . . . if like maybe we could like get a fic where like Riza gets injured of something that leads to Ed and Al finding out about her back scar, idk. Also a fic where they somehow discover that Roy and Riza have a longer history than they thought, with him apprenticing for her father and all. They can be the same fic if need be. Forever grateful <3
Not me finally getting to this like. A million years later. Sorry lmao
x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x | x
A few months into their occupation of their Central house, Riza leaves the shower in a towel without thinking. She knows Roy is out with Havoc and Breda for a rare guy's night out (which she almost had to force him into agreeing to) and the boys are usually in the house's library or the one at Central Command until they come home in the wee hours of the morning to sleep, so she doesn't even consider the fact that one of the boys in her life could see her like this.
However, she's apparently forgotten that even prodigious alchemists have to eat at some point, and just as she's about to reach her room, she hears something hit the floor behind her. "R-Riza," says Edward's voice, and she turns around to see her two sons standing in the hallway, staring at her. Edward's eyes are round with horror, and Alphonse's armored body is being held much stiffer than usual. "Your back--"
Riza, too late, remembers that neither of the boys know about her tattoo, or her scar. She spins around, clutching her towel a little tighter to her chest to keep it from falling and making the whole situation even worse. "Boys, it's okay," she says.
"That's a burn scar," Alphonse says in a small voice that belies his true age. "Did Roy--"
She can tell where this is going, and she sighs. "Can I get dressed before we have this conversation?"
*
They go back down to the kitchen when she's in her pajamas, and she makes tea for herself and Edward. "How much do you know about flame alchemy?" she asks them.
Edward's the one who answers. "Only what we've seen Roy do, and the circle on his gloves."
"He learned alchemy from my father, Berthold Hawkeye," Riza says, staring into her tea cup. "My father was a genius, but he was also paranoid, and he refused to pass along the knowledge of flame alchemy to Roy. Instead of keeping traditional notes, my father tattooed an array with all of his research on my back, and after he passed away from an illness, I let Roy learn the secrets of flame alchemy so he could become a State Alchemist, and then I followed him into the military."
She takes a deep breath. She's never had to tell this story before; the only other person who needed to know about it also lived through it. "Then, after the civil war, we were both horrified at what Roy was ordered to do, and I knew that we couldn't let anyone else know flame alchemy. If it ever fell into the wrong hands..." She trails off and shakes her head. "So I had Roy burn the knowledge off of my back. He would never have done it if I didn't ask."
"That's why the array on his glove is so simple," Edward mutters in realization. "That's why he does all the equations in his head. If it were any more obvious, anyone with half a brain would be able to figure it out."
Alphonse looks like he wants to reach out and touch her, but he doesn't. "Did it hurt?"
"Yes." There's no reason to lie to these boys. They're too smart for things to be toned down for them. "I don't think I'll ever feel pain like it again." Then, because she knows neither boy will leave before she gives them permission, she feigns a yawn. "Thank you for listening. I'm going to head to bed now."
She barely gets a response out of them as she climbs the stairs, and even when she settles into bed, she doesn't sleep until she hears them return to their room and Roy coming in the front door.
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Note
YEET
Suffer. :)
🌀Post the fic summary for a fic you haven't written/published yet. It can be hypothetical or something you really plan on releasing...
❄️Share a snippet from a WIP of your choosing.
🌤️Share your favorite piece of dialogue from your WIP.
🌧️Share something angsty from your WIP.
🌈 Share something soft/fluffy from your WIP.
💧Share something romantic/hot from your WIP, or just something sweet if it's gen.
🌩️ Share something funny/cracky from your WIP.
☔Is there a fic concept you have that you'd like to just explain and share because you're not sure you'll ever write it? If so, what is it?
🌪️Sum up a WIP with a few fic tropes/Ao3 tags.
Hello to you too, Eil, thank you for the ask!
I do be suffering
You're getting multiple fandoms since you've listen to me ramble about so many of them lmao. Take a guess at which is which lol
🌀Post the fic summary for a fic you haven't written/published yet. It can be hypothetical or something you really plan on releasing...
Katya has rewritten the same paper four times already. Derwin nearly passed out into a plate of eggs. Amber is on her fifth energy drink of the morning. And Raine… they just want their crew to actually sleep for more than two hours.
❄️Share a snippet from a WIP of your choosing.
“I have a high pain tolerance.” Lilith pointed a sharpened claw at her niece, “You, Eda-Spawn, do not. You, much like your mother, refuse to take care of yourself properly because you don’t like to inconvenience those around you.”  Luz rolled her eyes giving a very teenage defeated huff and opted for turning her face into the cushions to ignore the rest of the conversation.  “HEY!” Eda’s offended shout carried down from upstairs.
🌤️Share your favorite piece of dialogue from your WIP.
"No." Daisy gaped at her like a fish. "But, Mom-" "I said no, Daisy," Jiaying sighed.  "But-" "No." Daisy paused, taking an interest in the floor and slumping her shoulders in defeat for a total of seven seconds before looking elsewhere.  "Kora-" "Daisy, don't you dare." "...GORDON!" "NO!" 
🌧️Share something angsty from your WIP.
Eda stared.  Her dad was on the ground. Bleeding.  He was bleeding.  One hand over his eye where she had… There was a sharp intake of air and Lilith was suddenly in front of her, blocking her view of their dad.  And too close for Eda to hurt her. 
🌈 Share something soft/fluffy from your WIP.
“Was there ever a name in mind for him?” Jones wasn’t sure why he asked. Judy and Brad shared a look before Judy let out a soft laugh.  “We were going to name him Fred,” Brad explained.  “After you,” Judy clarified.
💧Share something romantic/hot from your WIP, or just something sweet if it's gen.
i HAD TO GO SEARCHING FOR SOMETHING ROMANTIC BECAUSE I NEVER WRITE ROMANCE LMFAOOO
"Eda?" Raine glanced at her as they were flying beside her trying not to get blasted by the coven guards shooting at them. "Rainestorm," Eda acknowledged, quickly swerving to the right to avoid getting hit. "Wedding. Wedding tomorrow."  "Agreed."  Lilith let out an incredulous groan and ignored the blasts of magic flying past her, "You're telling me twenty years and this is how it happens." 
🌩️ Share something funny/cracky from your WIP.
“Mother, stop trying to bribe my roommate with your knitting-”
☔Is there a fic concept you have that you'd like to just explain and share because you're not sure you'll ever write it? If so, what is it?
Might write it or may not but this concept of going through doors in your mind and like sorta going through the seven levels of purgatory. Idk how to describe it. But like it's messy. Sorry if that doesn't make any sense.
🌪️Sum up a WIP with a few fic tropes/Ao3 tags.
I wrote this instead of sleeping, alternative universe, no beta we die like Daisy's sanity
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pagesfromthevoid · 2 years
Note
bucky definitely has broken into reader’s apartment in the middle of the night while both matt and reader are out (patrol or date or case prep) just because he wanted a very specific snack that he loves and knows reader does too but he was out so instead of going to the store to get more he went and ransacked reader’s pantry.
matt & reader come back and matt is just done and tired so he goes straight to the shower while reader & bucky sit on the living room having a sleepover moment
(kinda how i imagine meredith from grey’s and sandra oh’s character were, ive never seen the show tho lmao)
THIS IS SO FUCKING FUNNY
“Someone’s in the apartment,” Matt whispered, listening carefully as he stood outside on the fire escape.
Matt is bloodied and battered, wanting nothing more than to get cleaned up and sleep. She’s feeling the same, having been thrown on her back tonight to the point that she felt it crack somewhere. But Matt’s paranoid, refusing to enter the apartment until he got a feel for who it was.
She shivers, groaning. “It’s probably Yelena. It’s always Yelena,” she reminds him, going to open the window.
“Welcome home.”
Matt makes the most aggregated sound possible, yanking his mask off and tossing it to the floor. “Why the hell are you in my apartment?”
“Our apartment,” she reminds him as she kicks her boots off. She narrows her eyes as Bucky holds up a box of watermelon sour patch kids. “You ass. You can get those literally anywhere.”
“Yeah but this was closer.”
Matt just sort of stares blankly before he shakes his head. She’s about to ask Bucky to leave but Matt huffs in annoyance and throws his hands up, leaving the room and shutting the bedroom door.
“He’s such a good host,” Bucky offers, holding out the bag to her. She rolls her eyes and plops down beside him.
“We got our asses handed to us. Could have used some help.”
“Yeah, nah. I retired, remember?”
“I didn’t realize stealing back the shield and breaking Zemo out of jail was retiring.”
“Fuck you.”
“Get out of my apartment so I can placate my boyfriend.”
“I think I’m gonna stick around and cockblock him,” Bucky urged, grinning at her. From the bedroom, there sounded like a lamp being thrown at a wall. “See? He’s thrilled.”
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natsfirecat · 3 years
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Okay! Here’s my request:
Natasha x asexual reader (female),where Natasha confesses her feelings for the reader, but the reader reluctantly rejects her. So after turning down Natasha’s declaration of love, the reader can’t stand seeing Natasha all beaten down and upset, so the reader confesses that she is asexual, telling Natasha that she deserves to be with someone who can give her everything and satisfy her needs. That the reader won’t be enough, no matter how much in love she is with Natasha. But little does the reader know, Natasha doesn’t want those needs, but you.
What do you think? 😃🖤💜🤍
Enough
pairing: Natasha Romanoff x asexual fem reader
word count: 3.5k
summary: much to her dismay, r has to reject her crush, natasha
warnings: swearing, drinking, mentions of sex and sexual attraction, lmk if i need to add any more
A/N: thank you for this request! i love writing for asexual reader sm! i hope you like it, and remember that aces are valid and amazing! :D
also not proofread very well. i'm tired and too lazy rn lmao
You fiddled with your ring, staring blankly at the wall. You had just gotten home from a mission, and needed some time to rest up.
The mission had gone well, you went with Natasha. Your task was to stop a HYDRA attack on civilians. Everything went as planned, and there were no casualties.
Now that you were back, all you wanted to do was rest up and relax.
So, you did just that.
You only woke a few hours later because of Natasha calling you, saying that you had to debrief the mission.
So you reluctantly got out of bed, and made your way to the meeting room.
Fury was there, reading files, and Natasha sat in her usual seat. Her face lit up when you walked in, then she waved and motioned for you to sit down.
As Fury started going over the mission, you just gave short, straight to the point answers to his questions.
It wasn’t until Natasha gave a detailed summary that he let you leave.
While walking out the room, she stopped you.
“Are you going to Tony’s party tonight?”
“Wanda’s making me,”
She laughed, knowing that you most definitely would not be going to a social gathering unless one of your friends forced you.
“Well, I think it’ll be fun. I’ll see you there,”
You were about to shrug and go on a rant about how Tony’s parties were very much overrated, but she simply waved goodbye and made her way down the hallway back to her room.
You were about to do the same before you felt someone tap your arm from behind.
You whipped around, then grinned to see Carol.
“You’ve been back and haven’t seen me yet?”
“Sorry…” you muttered, suddenly feeling guilty.
“You can make it up to me by getting me food,”
You rolled your eyes, then agreed, knowing you would get yourself food too.
She gave you a satisfied smile before beginning to walk down the steps towards the garage of cars.
She stepped into the driver’s seat of course, while you followed behind in the passenger’s seat.
“IHOP?” She asked, despite the fact that it was 3:00 in the afternoon.
“Yes!”
“Great, you’re buying!”
You rolled your eyes, already knowing she would say that.
“So how’d the mission go?” She asked.
“It was fine, nothing exciting happened.
“As soon as we convince Fury to let you come to space with me for missions, things will get a lot more exciting for you,”
You smiled, then chuckled at her statement.
She would talk to you about space all the time, and you had often expressed interest in it. So she took it upon herself to make a slideshow presentation about why you should be allowed to go with her to space. It still needed some work, but she was absolutely planning on presenting it to Fury when it was done.
“Where will you take me?”
“Well we’d start off with something close, maybe not exit the galaxy neighborhood quite yet,”
You laughed again, looking forward to your space adventures with your best friend.
-
Carol had eaten about a quarter of her food before she broke the silence,
“So I heard you tell Natasha that you’re going tonight,”
“Yeah,” you said with a shrug, choosing to stare at your pancakes instead of making eye contact.
“Well that’s good, maybe you guys can talk and…”
“And what?” You were beginning to get a little irritated.
“Oh come on! We both know how you feel. Why can’t you just talk with her about it?”
“You know why, Carol,” you said as you subconsciously began to fidget with the black ring you always wore on the middle finger of your right hand.
She sighed, not wanting to fight you on this. So she went back to eating her pancakes, and didn’t say another word about it to you.
-
As you reluctantly promised, you were at the party that night. Not wanting to engage too much, you stood off at the edge of the room, taking a small sip of your drink.
Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Wanda and Natasha talking. You thought nothing of it, until you saw Wanda wink at her.
You turned your head to the side, then accidentally made eye contact.
Quickly shifting your gaze to the floor, you took another sip of your drink to hide your embarrassment.
You then decided to walk away, not wanting to create any more awkward tension.
You made your way into the next room until you almost bumped into Sam, who gave you a weird look as he stepped away from you.
“You alright, L/N?” He asked.
“I’m good!” You told him, quickly walking away.
When you finally got to the corner of the other room, you took a deep breath. You finally let yourself relax against the wall, away from the person you wanted to avoid tonight.
You closed your eyes for a minute, pretending you weren’t here.
For just a moment, it worked; you weren’t a loud, crowded party. You were just happy in your room watching movies and eating popcorn. No one was bothering you, and you didn’t have to worry about anything.
Unfortunately, your moment didn’t last.
Your eyes opened again when you heard your name called several times. Standing in front of you, was Natasha.
You noticed both Wanda and Carol standing at the door, watching the both of you.
“Hi, Y/N,” she said, her voice shakier than normal. “There’s something I wanted to talk to you about, can we talk somewhere more private?”
You nodded, then began to follow her back the way you came until you were in another hallway that didn’t have anyone in it.
“Y/N,” she began. “I’ve always liked you as a person, I think you’re brilliant on the field, and I just love being around you. I feel these things around you, and it’s scary. But there’s something between us, I can feel it, and I think you feel it too. I’d like to explore these feelings, so… would you want to go out together… on a date?”
You let out a sigh as your heart dropped. You felt tears coming to your eyes as you thought about what she was saying to you. As much as it would hurt both of you, you had to do it.
“I’m really sorry, Natasha, but no. I can’t.”
“Oh-” she was taken aback from your response, unable to hide the disappointment in her voice. “This was stupid, you’re right. I’m sorry for even asking in the first place, I-” she couldn’t even finish her sentence before walking off, leaving you alone.
-
Two days later, Natasha had barely left her room. She stayed under the covers, mostly trying to sleep. Of course, it eventually turned into hours of staring at the ceiling while her stomach was in knots.
So, she took a sip from the bottle of vodka she brought up to her room, and leaned back against the headboard.
As soon as she felt tears forming in her eyes, she grabbed the remote and turned on the TV. She watched the saddest movies and TV shows she could think of, and ended up finishing the entire bottle.
If she was going to be sad and cry, it would be from too much drinking while watching sad stuff. It wouldn’t be from you. Natasha refused to let herself cry over a simple rejection.
But it wasn’t a simple rejection.
She’s had these feelings for you for months.
Your smile has made her heart flutter since your first mission with her. She vividly remembers the way your eyes lit up when you found out you were paired with her.
The two of you ended up working so well together. At the end of the mission, you held both your hands up for a double high five. The gesture confused her at first, but she eventually gave in and placed her hands against yours. That’s when you gave her the same smile that still gives her butterflies.
She didn’t even start to notice it until a few months ago, when Clint called her out on it. He noticed that your name was brought up in their conversations a lot. So he blatantly asked her what her feelings for you were.
Of course, she denied everything at first. You were just a friend who was nice to work with. Nothing more.
She didn’t fully realize it until Wanda called her out on it too.
You were eating breakfast, and Natasha’s eyes never left you. You exchanged smiles a few times, and the butterfly feeling in her stomach kept growing.
Wanda saw, feeling a smile grow on her face as she glanced between the two of you. Of course, her powers made this even more fun for her.
While she didn’t usually like to invade people’s private thoughts, especially her friends’, Natasha’s thoughts were loud. Yours too.
So after you got up, and waved goodbye to the both of them, Wanda immediately cornered Natasha. Normally, she wouldn’t do something like that to the assassin, but she felt okay with it considering that her thoughts of you softened her up a bit.
“So, when are you planning on asking Y/N out?” She asked her.
“What are you talking about?”
“You guys would make such a good couple, you should ask her out!”
“Absolutely not! We’re just friends,”
Wanda let out a huff, then rolled her eyes.
“You seem to forget that I’m a telepath,”
This time, Natasha rolled her eyes at her.
“Stay out of my head, Maximoff,”
And with that, she walked away, not wanting to talk about it any longer.
Of course, Wanda had other plans.
The next week, she made mental notes of how the two of you would interact. No matter how much you both denied it, she knew you had feelings for each other.
While you smiled around everyone, you smiled the most around her. Your eyes would light up, and you’d be grinning from ear to ear. And your smile would usually cause her to reciprocate it. She rarely smiled, but she was okay with you seeing her smile.
On top of that, Wanda noticed all the small gestures you would do for each other.
She would pack your bag for missions often, and you would share your food with her.
While both of those things could be seen as platonic, she knew better. You definitely had feelings for each other.
So when she brought it up to Natasha again, she couldn’t even deny it this time.
“Tell anyone, and I’ll make you feel pain you didn’t even know could be felt,” Natasha threatened her.
Wanda nodded, promising that she only wanted to help her.
Eventually, the assassin gave in and let her plan the whole thing out.
It would work out in the end, it had to.
-
Now, Natasha let out a growl of frustration as Wanda entered her room.
“Can you at least knock?”
“I’m worried about you, Nat,”
Despite her glares, Wanda continued walking towards her until she sat down on the foot of her bed.
“Why do you even care? You lied to me, you said it would work!”
“I really thought it would, I’m so sorry. But you can’t keep yourself locked in here, we’re all worried about you,”
“I can’t face her after I humiliated myself like that. Why would you tell me she had feelings for me too? You said you could tell from her thoughts, but she clearly doesn’t see me that way. Now I’ve probably ruined my friendship with her too.”
“I don’t know why that happened,”
“Please, just leave me alone.”
Letting out a disappointed sigh, Wanda realized this would get her nowhere. Natasha still needed a bit more time.
As she saw her friend leave the room, she finally allowed the tears to fall again.
She hated herself for it, but maybe she actually was crying over you.
-
It wasn’t like you were doing any better.
You only left your room to train with Carol, and to bring food back up to your room since you didn’t want to eat with everyone else.
You couldn’t help but notice the way Wanda glared at you when you passed her in the hallway. You ended up glaring right back, surprised by her sudden hostility towards you.
The two of you had been relatively close, but she was especially close with Natasha. You knew you had hurt her with your rejection, but in the end, you were doing her a favor.
She’d understand that eventually, and hopefully, so would Wanda.
For now, you lay in bed. You were clinging tightly onto your pillow, letting a few sobs escape.
Even though you knew the rejection was for the best, for both you and Natasha, it didn’t make it hurt any less.
You were only saving the both of you from future heartbreak. It would be worth it eventually. Soon enough, you’d both get over it and go back to being the friends you once were.
However, now you continued crying into your pillow.
You wished you could just turn feelings on and off with a switch, but you couldn’t. It would make things so much easier if these feelings didn’t exist in the first place.
You had tried to suppress and deny them at first.
You ignored the way you felt yourself smiling more at her. You ignored the way you felt like you were on top of the world when she returned your smile. You ignored the way your stomach turned into a knot of nerves whenever you touched; whether it was a full on hug or just fingers brushing past each other in the hallway.
When she sat next to you on movie night though, closer than she normally did, that’s when you realized you couldn’t ignore the feelings anymore.
You wanted to completely close the distance between the two of you, and snuggle completely into her. You wanted to kiss her, and hold her tight. You wanted everything to do with her.
But you couldn’t have her, and it hurt like hell.
-
After another two days, Carol came barging into your room.
“Y/N, what the fuck?” She said, getting straight to the point.
Your eyes widened, but you said nothing as she sat down and glared at you.
“You’ve been sulking for days, and haven’t done anything about it,”
You shrugged, sinking back father into the bed.
“What do you want me to do?”
“Talk to her!”
“No! I’m just gonna stay here until my feelings go away,”
“Y/N, I love you, platonically, but sometimes you’re the dumbest person I know,”
“Thanks, Carol,”
“Your feelings aren’t gonna magically go away like that. If you don’t wanna date her, then at least talk to her so you can both have some closure on this!”
“I can’t, she’d never understand and it’d just be a whole thing, and I don’t want that,”
“You explained it to me and I understood,”
“Well yeah, cuz it doesn’t affect you at all. It affects her because it’s the reason I can’t be with her,”
“Have you ever thought to consider that maybe she wouldn’t mind?”
“Of course she’d mind, Carol,”
Sighing, your best friend decided she wasn’t gonna win this battle today.
Despite her anger towards you, she still reached over and hugged you before getting up and leaving.
Once again, you were left alone in your own misery.
You began to fidget with your ring, staring at the flag on your wall. The black, grey, white, and purple colors stood out against the wall, adding a nice touch to your room.
You were obviously proud and unashamed of who you were, but that didn’t change the fact that so many people didn’t understand it. So it was just easier to not bring it up. Maybe one day you could find someone like you, who’d understand.
Tears began to fill your eyes as you thought about Natasha. You hated that you had to do this.
You weren’t even sure if you would be able to salvage your friendship at the end of this. That just made everything worse.
You lay back down again, clinging onto the pillow once more.
You remembered the way you felt when Natasha first smiled at you. You remembered the happiness she made you feel. You remembered just how much you wanted to be around her.
Luckily, your thoughts of misery finally stopped when you managed to fall asleep.
-
The next day, Carol dragged you out of your room. Literally dragged, she grabbed both your wrists and pulled you out of the bed until you hit the floor.
“Ow! What the fuck?”
“No more sulking, you’re getting up and not coming back to your room until tonight. Let’s go,”
You sighed in defeat, then stood up, following her out of your room.
She dragged you downstairs to the kitchen, where she already had breakfast laying out for you.
As annoyed as you were with her, you definitely thought it was sweet that she was going through all this effort for you.
So you sat down and began eating, forcing a smile. You were still hurting, but for now, you could fake it in front of your friend.
She sat down next to you, and seemed satisfied.
You gave a small smile, then continued eating.
It was progress.
-
When Natasha finally came down, you were the last person she expected to see. Her bloodshot, puffy eyes widened as she saw you with Carol.
She immediately looked away, not wanting to face you, especially like this.
Unfortunately for her, you had already made eye contact for a moment. You took in her appearance, letting out a deep exhale.
She refused to say anything, then turned around as if she had never been there in the first place.
As soon as she left, you turned back to Carol.
“I really messed up, didn’t I?”
-
As much as the logical part of your mind tried to convince you not to do this, the other part was currently making you.
So now, you stood outside Natasha’s bedroom, hand hovering over the door, prepared to knock.
You took in a few deep breaths, trying to prepare yourself. Just as you were about to knock, the door swung open before you were ready.
“Y/N?” Natasha didn’t expect to see you after what happened. “What are you doing?”
“Can we please talk?”
She frowned, thinking about what happened the last time you two talked. But, she opened the door wider, letting you in.
You walked over to her bed, waiting for her to nod, giving you permission to sit down.
“I just wanted to start off by saying that I’m really sorry for this, for hurting you like that,”
“You don’t need to apologize. You can’t change how you feel.”
“I know, but here’s the thing; I have feelings for you too,”
Her eyes widened in both shock and confusion.
“Then why’d you say no?”
You took in a few more deep breaths, preparing yourself.
“I’m asexual,” you finally got out. “While I feel romantic attraction to you, and really like you, I’m not sexually attracted to you. I’m not sexually attracted to anyone.”
She tilted her head to the side, but continued listening as you went on.
“So as much as I do like you, it’s not fair for us to be together. You deserve someone who can give you everything you want and need in a relationship, and I can’t do that.” You told her, trying to prevent yourself from crying. “No matter how much I love you, I won’t be enough,”
That’s what broke you, causing the tears to stream down your face as they had so many times within the past few days. Telling her everything you had been thinking, and finally getting it out.
You noticed a few tears forming in her eyes as she sat down next to you, wrapping her arm around your shoulder.
“Thank you for telling me,” she said. “I wish you had told me earlier, though,”
“I know, I’m sorry,”
“You’re wrong though,”
“About what?”
“You are enough for me, Y/N. I don’t care about sex, I just want you.”
“Really? You mean it?”
“Of course I do,”
You let out a gasp, then turned and wrapped both your arms around her, leaning in between her chest and neck.
“You’re okay with kisses though, right?”
You smiled, then leaned in and crashed your lips against hers. That certainly answered her question.
It felt like a weight was lifted off the both of you. You loved being like this with her, lips connected and arms wrapped around one another. You never wanted to let go.
When you had to break apart for air, Natasha smirked at you.
“So how about that date now?”
480 notes · View notes
leviiattacks · 3 years
Note
Lmao Levi being irritated because reader, his roomate, who he still hasn't confessed to yet, gets a cat.
The cat hates Levi but loves reader and reader loves the cat too and it's basically Levi vs the cat someone help
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note :: very rushed and not proofread i only wrote for fun because once again i am bed ridden with sickness ha ha the perks of always being sick i suppose T__T
lord, does levi despise the way you act without thinking sometimes
he’s legitimately appalled at how you can manage to always do shit like this
even more appalled at how he lets you get away with it every time
now, what is the shit you have done this time?
brought a cat home a CAT
first things first, you are allergic to cats so he does not understand how that predicament will fix itself
secondly, cats shed EVERYWHERE
as much as he enjoys cleaning he is not going to clean that up every day
thirdly, cats will ruin furniture and claw at it
as well as the curtains!!!!
and levi loves the curtains in the living room because the both of you picked them out together
though it was a struggle to get you interested enough to pick a pair you liked.
maybe that’s why he’s looking at you irked by this all
you’re holding the kitten in your arms playing around with her
“peek... a... boo!”
playing fucking peek-a-boo with a cat? he questions himself in his head
“y/n. we are not keeping the cat.”
at this you innocently look up at him through your lashes
god, there you go again doing that
he doesn’t know if you’re aware of the impact you have on him when you do that
he’s good at holding his composure but that look ignites something in him
but he always has to push that something down his throat
“c’mon, you’d be the best roomie ever if you let me keep her!”
his eyes narrow at the word roomie
is that all he is to you?? a roomie???
you’re holding the cat up alongside your face and are fake pouting
“you. are. allergic. to. cats.” he punctuates every word clearly
“how do you know that?” you ask reasonably shocked he knows something that obscure and random about you
“you like talking about yourself when you’re drunk.”
a memory of him helping you throw up whilst he carefully holds your hair out of your face flashes past
if it were anyone else he wouldn’t have got anywhere near them if they were throwing up
but it was you,
it was always you.
“you rambled on and on and on about wanting a cat as a kid but not getting one because of your allergies.”
“so you would also know-” the cat tries to scratch your arm and you retract giggling
“that i really want a cat!”
“does that change your allergies? poof oh wow y/n you’re no longer allergic to shitty cats because you want one.”
you roll your eyes at his deadpan expression and pessimism
“if you knew anything about cats you would know this is a cornish rex” you now rebuttal
“a fucking what?”
“hypoallergenic cat breed! my allergies to cats are mild so it’s the perfect cat for me”
the crease between his eyebrow deepens.
“do you forget that we live in this apartment together?”
you scrunch your nose looking at your little buddy who has now settled in your lap “how could i forget that?”
he knows you see him as nothing more than a roommate
levi loves you he does but you don’t know that
but part of him thinks you do because you always give him that look when you want something
you’re doing it again.
the look.
“fuck. fine but if that thing coughs up a hair ball she’s out.”
“AAAHH THANK YOU I LOVE YOU LEVI!!!!” you’re ecstatic
his breath traps itself in his throat when he hears that
how can you carelessly say i love you??
you’re happily looking between him and the cat and hand her over to levi
“hold her you’re the dad”
“so you’re the...?” he asks
“i’m the...???” you’re clueless
he shakes his head waving it off
it takes you a moment to understand what he’s asking then your eyes widen
“ohhh the mum? yeah that would be me”
it’s so stupid, so stupid, so so so stupid he repeats it in his head the whole scenario is stupid
but it doesn't stop him from smiling like an idiot
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in recent days you’ve given her the names diana, garfield and casper
sadly, none of then seem to stick because you’re too indecisive
it’s got to the point where you barge into levi’s room without asking
you’re in your pyjamas he looks at you confused as to why you’ve walked in with no permission at 2am
in a cucumber face mask...?
“name the cat please, name the cat i can’t stick to a name i’m going to rip my hair out“ you’re gripping at your hair groaning in frustration.
“edgar’
first suggestion, too ugly.
you shake your head
“candy“
second suggestion, no, just no.
you shake your head again in refusal
“zero?“
yeah, no.
another shake of the head
levi ponders and thinks hard “...angel?’
you blush, jump back and look more than startled
fumbling with your fingers awkwardly you edge closer towards the door
he just eyes you weirdly wondering what causes that reaction
well, you must like the name
“is it good enough?” he asks
you’re speechless not knowing what to actually say
“y/n...????”
you snap out of it
“isn’t that something you’d call a significant other not a cat?”
and for once in your life you actually seem kinda annoyed at him
“your cat is an angel in your eyes that’s the point” he’s explaining his point but you aren’t listening
you don’t know why levi saying that word makes your heart race
that’s why you’re annoyed right now
in fact it’s not that you’re annoyed. you’re scared that it triggers this response because this is levi.
levi, your roommate the same roommate who argues about pizza toppings with you. he’s nothing more than that.
but your cheeks continue to flush behind the cucumber face mask
“i’ll ask someone else what to name him just call him salad for now” without letting him get a word in you leave but somehow you forget the cat
salad turns to levi and gives him what can only be described as a menacing look.
“you happy you annoying shit? y/n’s annoyed because i can’t name you”
your cat jumps at him and tries to scratch at a piece of flesh but is held off easily
one cold look from levi and she stops.
“get out my room you pest.” he says as he places the cat on the floor
salad scurries away and levi rolls his eyes
he hates that cat he really does
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a few hours pass levi is still up he’s always found it hard to sleep
it’s been a long day he’s just finished a thesis for his physics degree and stretches out contently
to say he’s tired is an understatement but his throat is dry and he needs to DESPERATELY hydrate
he gets to his feet and ventures into the kitchen to retrieve some water then he’ll knock out like a log and fall asleep.
the pitch of your snoring can be heard and he smiles to himself silently.
it’s all good, he’s sure you’re getting all the sleep you need.
“GRRRE”
there it is,
the little fucker, your cat is still up.
“what is it little shit?” levi asks leaned up against the surface of the counter.
salad is only staring at him blankly before turning to look over at the living room.
it’s dim the lights are switched off but levi feels something is feels off
“the hell did you do?” he asks
but salad shows no signs of breaking and revealing what it is she’s done
levi’s going to have to investigate
stepping towards the living room he flicks the lights open.
eyes survey the entire area everything looks good until he sees the way the drapes have been ripped apart
salad is picked up in one swoop she sees how levi is about to throw her out the front door and panics
meowing and struggling just in the nick of time she jumps before running away and slipping into the safety of your bedroom
groaning levi goes back to the living room to see if he’s missed anything.
well, god damn him.
scratches litter the leather furniture, it almost looks like a crossword.
salad has also conveniently taken a shit behind the sofa,
and to top it all off she’s left a dead mouse in the middle of the living room floor
levi. is. infuriated.
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“you should thank her for catching the mouse”
you’re hurriedly eating some toast levi has made for you as you brush your hair out and gather it into a low ponytail
“look at the drapes y/n??” he’s exasperated and trying to make sense of your logic
“i didn’t like the drapes anyway we needed new ones.”
you aren’t taking this seriously at all and it’s getting on his nerves now
he runs a hand through his hair and glares at you “i told you taking the cat in was a bad idea”
your hair tie snaps and so do you
all the doubts from yesterday are eating you away. the question still lingers in your mind - how do you really feel about levi?
“do you have to have an opinion on everything i do? you’re my roommate not my boyfriend.”
it’s your fault for letting your anger and stress get the better of you. to be frank you have no clue why you’ve gone and said that.
if you’re honest with yourself you know he’s not a roommate. he’s not a friend either but at the same time he’s definitely not a boyfriend.
he’s more than a friend to you but you don’t think he sees you similarly.
oh how wrong you are
“roommate?”
levi’s question is filled with not an ounce of humour, the both of you know that.
oddly, he sounds displeased,
but you can’t take it back now.
and you hate backing down
“what?” you scoff
he shakes his head and makes his way to the front door not turning to look at you.
“get a grip on that cat otherwise i’m throwing it out”
SLAM!
you’ve done it, you’ve messed it up.
salad jumps up on the counter and licks your toast
maybe, he is right about the cat.
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the rest of the week is incredibly busy you have an important economics presentation due today and you’ve done everything you need to prepare for it.
at least that’s what you think,
you’re stood in front of the class introducing yourself and everything seems to be going smoothly
price determination within the economic market might as well be advertised as a sleeping pill because you don’t know how you can get anyone interested enough to keep their eyes open.
but putting your best foot forward an attempt is still made.
“the buyers and sellers accept this price, and buy and sell accordin-”
you’re abruptly cut off by your professor who coughs and then proceeds to leer at you in disgust.
a few moments of silence pass and you can feel your heart hammer in your chest.
suddenly he points at the door,
he’s known for being harsh, strict and a stingy marker but it’s not as if you’ve shown up with nothing done...?
in fact this is the largest amount of effort you’ve put into your economics course since you’ve started it.
being in your usual seasonal slump has held you back but now you’re actually trying he’s saying it’s not good enough?
“your presentation. it’s awful. not enough effort put into it, leave for today.” his voice is rumbling and intimidating.
you’re stunned, you’ve worked tirelessly day and night to finish this off.
you’ve even had to cry over not knowing or understanding how to make pie charts.
interpreting data has never been your strong suit.
too embarrassed to ask for help you had to spend hours figuring out how to make it all work alongside your excel chart and spreadsheet
sighing heavily you speak up “professor i’ve spent a lot of time on this?”
“i looked through the slides. dog shit.” his response is fiery and you shudder at the boiling frustration he’s shooting right at you.
arguing in front of the lecture hall is not what you wish to do and you’re sure you aren’t going to be the only person sent out this way.
just retreat y/n 
you do.
the professor is clearly in a bad mood and taking it out on you, there’s nothing you can do about it.
wordlessly you gather your belongings and leave.
as you trudge back home the feeling of not being good enough sinks in your stomach like a heavy anchor at sea.
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entering through the front door is a task and a half through your glossed over eyes but somehow you manage
you’ve kept salad in your room for most of the time after your argument and she seems to actually miss levi’s presence.
so when the first thing you see as soon as you enter is salad clawing at his bedroom door begging to be let in you aren’t surprised.
thankfully for you he’s yet to return from class and hasn’t been disturbed by the sounds.
at least that’s what you assume.
you look at salad and start sobbing
you wish you were a cat.
cats don’t get shit on for fucking up economics presentations that’s for sure.
shaking you try to hold yourself up against one of the walls
frankly, school stress is getting to you.
you tried hard on that presentation only for it to fail when it was worth a quarter of your grade.
A QUARTER...
TWENTY FIVE PERCENT...
salad nuzzles herself against your leg and you lean over to pick her up
she licks at your ear, it tickles and you laugh in between sobs
“you sure are good at comforting people huh?” you’re so worn out your laugh sounds half dead.
it’s all so pathetic. you standing in your living room wailing as you hold your pet cat like a baby.
but she doesn’t mind and let’s you cry to your hearts content.
“MEOW” salad loudly squeaks and you stroke her back but she only keeps at it “MEOWWWW.”
sensing that she’s bringing something to your attention you turn around
there stands levi awkwardly waving at you and you instinctually cover your face with your arm.
the smudged mascara is none of his business.
“wanna order pizza and talk about it?”
pursing your lips at the proposition you slowly lower your arm and scratch at the sleeve of your shirt.
"yeah, i’d love that.”
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“KICKED YOU OUT THE LECTURE HALL?? YOU WORKED ON THAT FOR DAYS Y/N, DAYS??”
levi is beyond pissed he hasn’t even touched the second slice of his pizza after hearing how your presentation played out.
“it’s okay, it was probably going to go bad i can’t do anything right.”
levi’s silver eyes fog up in annoyance and you shut yourself up.
“you are the most able person i have met.”
head rocking up in surprise the confession is news to you.
“really?“
“you’re great at making pad thai, somehow you convinced me to keep that cat, i remember that other time you convinced a first year to bungee jump off a building for last years charity fundraiser.”
it truly is endearing how he doesn’t call you smart or witty or hard-working. none of that basic nonsense you’ve heard time and time again from everyone else.
the fact he’s naming the most random things makes your heart swell.
you burst into laughter remembering the first year’s quivering form and you wonder why levi even remembers that.
“if salad bothers you that much i could find a friend to look after her.”
levi looks at you like he’s just come face to face with a ghost.
“no? i like her, she might frustrate me and get in the way when i want to-” he stops himself fumbling over his sentence.
“when you want to?“ you’re leaning in closer intrigued what the rest of the sentence is.
shock flashes over his face but the next second it disappears.
taking a gulp of his water seemingly in preparation he looks you right in the eye.
“when i want to kiss you.”
and that’s all it takes for you to tug him by the shirt and slam his lips against yours, you giggle into the kiss as you situate yourself in his lap. hands ghosting over your hips he’s disoriented not sure where to place his palms but you don’t care. you’ve been waiting for this and despite his sloppy response the fact you’re finally doing what you’ve been fearing the most these past few weeks is only filling you with adrenaline.
“settle down.” he’s panting heavy and ragged. “i was meant to initiate it and look cool what the fuck??” he’s not mad, he’s just playing with you but that doesn’t stop you from getting into the role.
“and if i don’t settle?” you mischievously ask, levi’s hands are cupping your jaw he pushes your hair out of your face and simply gazes in awe.
he makes you feel so beautiful, it’s unreal.
“meow...” salad’s dissatisfied whining can be heard and then out of nowhere in one fluid motion she jumps onto levi’s chest.
“salad if you don’t mind i’m trying to make out with your dad.” you explain with a frown.
she doesn’t budge and instead a trickling sound can be heard, then a foul smell floats into the room and levi screams.
“Y/N THE LITTLE SHIT IS PEEING ON ME???”
541 notes · View notes
inkbyajm · 3 years
Text
Something Brewing
pairing: C.H. x fem!reader
category: fluff
warnings: anxiety attack
word count: 1.5k
notes: felt like angst, felt like sobbing uncontrollably, but my body wouldn’t cooperate, so imagining it will do for now. this was supposed to be a one-shot, but i didn’t realise how much i had written. now i’m splitting it into two parts. next part will definitely be more angst than fluff, so stay tuned for the terrifying sight that is angry corpse :) (p.s. don’t mind the occasional use of british english, it’s my default lmao)
next >
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A peculiar thing it was, the concept of love. It was very personal and feelings about it varied from person to person. For some, it had existed since the beginning of time, when Adam and Eve first walked the Earth, when the Almighty willed his beloved humans to lead their own lives with him in their hearts. For others, it is a feeling to long for, to crave, a feeling they found themselves daydreaming about often. And for the rest, love is a tool of ruin, potentially driving people who cared for one another away from each other, instilling at least a smidge of repulsion in each one of them. However, humans are social creatures after all, and sometimes, attraction was unavoidable no matter how much one tried. And try he did.
Living in California could get hard and stressful at times, but at least Corpse didn’t live at the heart of the city of anxiety-inducing social interactions and constant chaos that was Los Angeles. Sure, it meant that he didn’t live close to his friends, but he wasn’t far away from her, and that was enough for him.
A few soft grunts and sounds of slippers landing on the hardwood floor echoed from the kitchen of (Y/N)’s apartment. He got up from the couch in her living room and decided to investigate the source of the noise. Coming into the room, he saw her jumping to reach the highest shelf in one of the cupboards. Looking at it, he noticed her favourite mug sitting at the edge of said shelf and, afraid she would knock it over whilst attempting to grab it, he effortlessly got it for her. “Thank you. God, I was about to grow a foot taller trying to reach for this thing.” she sighed, eliciting a deep chuckle from him, “See, this is exactly why you’re my favourite friend.” Friend? Well, yes, of course a friend, what else would he be? Corpse felt an uncomfortable tug at his heart, and he couldn’t pinpoint the exact reason why he was feeling that way, so he brushed it aside. “Why was it that high up if you can’t even reach it?” (Y/N) wasn’t a short person, she was perfectly average, and he himself wasn’t that tall of a guy either. But when it came to situations of this kind, he couldn’t help but feel good about his being taller. “It usually isn’t, but I let (F/N) use it once the other day because she refused to drink out of any of the other mugs, that stubborn bitch.” she replied, pouring her homemade Italian hot chocolate into the acquired cup. (F/N) was also taller than (Y/N), so it was only natural for her to be putting things in higher places. It was done out of habit.
(Y/N) and Corpse walked back to the living room to once again settle into the couch. He glanced at her as she sat with her legs crossed, concentrated on blowing on her moderately hot beverage, while the light from the moon peeked through the curtains of the balcony door, illuminating her face ever so slightly. Since when did he start noticing these things? Looking away to set his eyes on the TV in front of them, he sensed his heart beating at an usual rhythm, palpitating, and along with it came slight lightheadedness. Was he having a heart attack? Were these signs of atrial fibrillation? Or was this simply the start of an anxiety attack? Surely any of these would be more...recognisable, to say the least. The only situation he could think of with similar reactions was when one would develop a crush. A fucking crush? At his age? How old was he, ten? “Earth to Corpse? Please don’t tell me you’re one of those people who sleep with their eyes open, that’s fucking creepy.” Her finger snaps pulled him out of whatever trance he was in. “Sorry, were you saying something?” “I asked you if you had watched Bly Manor like three times. You were very far away.” she answered, emitting a few giggles. “Sorry, I uh- I was thinking of something, but it’s stupid. And no, I haven’t, I’ve been meaning to, though.” And just like that, they settled on the show they were going to watch for the next couple of weeks.
“NOOOOOOO,” (Y/N) yelled, voicing her defeat “WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF LUCK IS THIS.” Corpse lay on the floor, slamming his palm down onto it out of hysterical laughter. They had been playing Unmatched for the past hour, this being their third round, and after many cards and a level of tension that could only be cut through with a saw, his Robin Hood had finally defeated her Alice. It was Corpse’s first time playing, so to say that his winning of all three games was a crushing moment for her was an understatement. “This is not normal, you lied saying you’ve never played before!” she pouted, putting everything back into the box, “I’m usually really good at this game.”
He wiped the tears from his eyes, struggling to keep a good composure. “I’m sorry, I guess I’ve found my talent,” he joked, but he did feel bad for stealing her thunder, “Would it make you feel better if I said that my Robin Hood is, like, extremely hurt right now? You have a fucking gigantic knife as a weapon, I only have, like, a bow and arrow. That’s kind of unfair.” (Y/N) bit her lip in hesitation, then picked up her figurine and lightly tapped it along the table to approach his. Putting Alice at a slight angle, she made a kissing sound as to imitate her character smooching his. “There, a kiss to make it better. I promise not to hurt you too much if you let me win next time.” 
The same strange feeling he had experienced for the first time two months ago, when they were sitting on the couch of her living room, and many more times after that, had come back. He would’ve blamed it on heartburn, except it was nothing like it. It wasn’t anything he was used to. “Hey, you alright?” (Y/N) furrowed her brows in concern “You’ve been doing that a lot lately, rubbing your chest like that.” Fuck. He had never noticed the habit he had developed. “I’m fine, just me and my heart problems, nothing unusual.” Filthy liar. Brows still furrowed, she moved closer to him and, with her legs tucked under her, she put her hand above his heart to check. “Jesus, Corpse, your heart is going a million miles per hour! Are you sure you’re okay?”
Looking up at him, she noticed how red he had suddenly become, and this worried her even more. “Bubs, you’re literally changing colours.” How did she expect him not to when she was doing this? (Y/N) further inspected his condition and put the back of her hand on his forehead, then his cheeks, to check his temperature. Expectedly, he was getting warmer. She stopped for a second and listened intently, only to hear his shallow breathing fill the silence. She then glanced down at his left hand resting on his thigh, and surely enough, found it trembling. “Alright, Corpse? Hey, can you hear me?”
His breathing only picked up its pace as the seconds went by. On the spur of the moment, (Y/N) placed herself in front of him, her legs on either side, and gently cradled his head. “Corpse, darling, I’m gonna need you to look at me, okay? Focus on me, focus on my breathing, mm?” He forced himself to tear his gaze away from the ground and did as he was told, eyes darting around, analysing her expression. He’s never found himself having an attack in her presence, it was surprising how well she was handling it.
Wait- darling? Bubs? “Now, can you name four things that you see? Can you do that for me?” He briefly scanned the room for answers, his mind still cluttered. “The fridge, the couch, the light and-” Did she mean to call him that? It was probably nothing, she could be using it with any of her friends for all he knew. He wasn’t special. “and the game, the board game. On the table.” “Good, now can you name three things you hear?” This one took a lot of concentration, there weren’t many obvious sounds for him to point out. “The motorcycle outside, your hands rubbing against my skin, uh-” What the fuck else? Was he losing his mind? The task was simple enough, why was he having so much trouble with it? “I’m sorry, I- I don’t hear anything else.” “No, it’s okay. You’re doing splendid, see? Your breathing is much more stable.” she reassured him, squeezing his upper arms.
“Lastly, can you give me two things you can smell?” Nodding, he closed his eyes. “The coffee you drank earlier.” It took him a moment to come up with something else, and just as she was about to get off of his lap, figuring he had done a good enough job, she heard him mumble “your perfume”. Scared he’d get another attack, Corpse avoided looking into her eyes, which he could feel the gaze of. He only picked up on the scent from her shifting closer in the last second. “That’s funny, I had forgotten to put perfume on this morning.” 
261 notes · View notes
ncssian · 4 years
Text
A Favor: Part Three
Nessian Modern AU
Masterlist
a/n: tw for abuse mention. i hope this chapter is readable bc a lot of it was written when i should've been sleeping.
***
“...expecting heavy snow, possibly even a snowstorm, by the end of the week.” The TV blares softly in the background as Nesta types away on her laptop propped on the arm of the couch. The fireplace is up and crackling, and Cassian has to stop in the threshold between kitchen and living room to take in the scene. He’s getting a little too used to this, he worries sometimes. She’ll be gone as soon as her apartment is fixed, he reminds himself, and pushes off the wall to circle the couch and approach Nesta.
He sets the steaming mug of coffee down on the table before her and takes a seat beside her. She doesn’t even stop typing as she glances up and murmurs a “thank you” before returning to her paper.
Cassian doesn’t want to interrupt her work, so he settles into the comfortable habit of watching her. They watch each other a lot— Nesta claims it’s because she’s bored and there’s nothing else to look at. Cassian has no such delusions.
She’s in a wool sweater and thick leggings today. Her hair is pulled back in a worn braid and her glasses are pushed all the way up her nose, but what catches Cassian’s attention tonight is the way her baby hairs escape her braid and frizz around her temples. Yesterday it was the way her cheeks flushed in the firelight, and the day before it was those damn glasses. Today it’s baby hairs.
The fantasy is quick and sneaky, there in his mind before he’s even aware of it.
Getting up to sit on the floor before her. Nudging her legs apart with slow hands while her fingers stutter over the keyboard. Pushing the hem of her sweater up, and pulling her leggings down. “Focus on your work,” he says when she tries to push her laptop away. “Finish your paper for me.” Tracing the inside of her thighs with his lips until his head is right—
The slam of a laptop snaps Cassian out of it. Nesta makes a frustrated growl and rubs her hands across her face before shoving her laptop aside to reach for the coffee.
He raises a brow, endlessly amused by everything she does. “Writing troubles?”
“I deserve a break,” she grumbles.
“I could help with that.”
Tucking her feet beneath her legs, Nesta ignores him and gestures at the TV with her chin. “Think we’ll get snowed in?”
Cassian almost hopes so. Any excuse to build more fires and stay inside with Nesta. “I’ll have to make a shopping trip,” he says casually. “You want anything?”
“I want to be in a state where there aren’t blizzards in October.” She looks over at him. “I miss Tennessee.” It’s a simple admission that brings Cassian to attention. She never gives out details about herself unprompted.
“I didn’t know you still got homesick.” Feyre never talks about her childhood in Tennessee. The only indicator of the Archeron sisters’ pasts is Elain’s sweet little Southern belle accent, which Cassian has a feeling is more for show at this point than anything else.
Nesta shrugs awkwardly in response, but he keeps going. “Rhys’s mom had a summer house in the Smokies. We would go down there each year without fail until college.” Rhys thinks it was fate that the summer home was so close to the small mountain town where Feyre grew up. Cassian thinks that’s a stretch.
“Yeah?” Nesta sips her coffee. “Have you gone back since?”
He shakes his head. “Rhys and Feyre are renovating it right now. You should come vacation with us when it’s done.” He perks up at the sudden idea.
Nesta gives him that familiar weird look from the corner of her eye. “Mm-hm,” she hums noncommittally.
“I’m serious,” Cassian insists. “We could have fun.” He’s already imagining it, getting to show Nesta around the place he grew up. Hearing what she has to say about the rocks and corners he would hurt himself on when he played with his brothers, maybe even hearing about her childhood in the Smokies. But Nesta looks stuck, unsure of how to turn him down.
“It doesn’t sound like a good idea,” she states finally. “I wouldn’t be welcomed there, and I would be the odd outlier the entire time at best.”
Cassian already knows Nesta has no interest in getting friendly with the rest of Feyre’s friend group, and he can respect that. But he still wants her there.
“You wouldn’t have to hang out with everybody there,” he says. “You’d have me and your sisters. That’s three whole people.”
She looks surprised at that. “Since when did I have you?”
Oh. Cassian shrugs. “We’re friends, right? I like you, so you have me.”
She straightens even further at that. He continues without waiting for her reply. “That’s why I want you to vacation with us. I like you, and I’d like having you there.”
Nesta sits back against the couch, staring at him, and then her coffee, then him. “This is new,” she finally says.
Cassian is lost. “What is?”
She considers for a moment, chewing her lip. “I’ve had people say they love me,” she says slowly, “but I don’t think anyone has ever liked me very much.”
The words are so incomprehensible that Cassian just sits there like a fool. She’s making even less sense than when she told him she used to come around to Feyre’s all the time and he never noticed. “I don’t get it. Who doesn’t like you?”
Nesta frowns deeply. “Don’t make me come up with a list. It’s not nice.”
Cassian might need a list, because he wants to have words with these people. “Okay, then. Why wouldn’t anybody like you?”
Nesta’s eyes narrow into a glare and she scoffs like he just said something offensive. “Jesus, I don’t know. Why don’t you call up my ex and ask if you care so much?” She sets her empty mug down and stands up, gathering her laptop and notes as she goes.
Cassian doesn’t know what he said wrong. “Wait, Nes—”
“Thanks for the coffee, I’m going to finish my work in my room.” She pushes her glasses up her nose and speedwalks out of the room, ignoring Cassian’s calls to wait.
***
Cassian can’t sleep that night knowing Nesta is upset with him. He tried knocking at her door when he came upstairs an hour after Nesta had, but the lights were off and he received no reply. Now in bed, he listens to the howl of late autumn wind outside and goes over everything Nesta said earlier.
She misses Tennessee. She feels that nobody likes her. She has an ex that definitely doesn't like her.
It's the last two details that bother Cassian the most. He’s about to spiral into another hour of overthinking when his phone lights up on the nightstand.
Subconsciously thinking it's a text from Nesta, his hand shoots for his phone. He has to smother his disappointment when he sees it's only Feyre checking in.
Feyre: how are things going with nesta? is she causing u any trouble?
Maybe he’s still upset about his conversation with Nesta, but the text rubs him the wrong way. Nesta sounds like a pet or a rowdy child.
Cass: not at all. she’s perfect
He quickly erases that last word and hesitates, trying to think of another one.
she’s lovely wonderful great. He settles on great and clicks send.
A reply pops up a few seconds later.
Feyre: lmao sure
Cassian frowns at his phone. What’s that supposed to mean?
Another text appears: just tell me if you need anything and i’ll take care of it. i know this isnt easy.
What isn’t easy? Having a roommate? Cassian replies, We don’t need anything, we’re fine. He uses capitalization and everything, feeling offended for some reason. And then, not really wanting to see a reply from Feyre, he turns his phone off and leaves it facedown on the nightstand.
He shuffles deeper under the covers and pushes his friend out of his mind, thinking about ways to make up with Nesta tomorrow instead.
***
Nesta stays up all night berating herself for how she reacted to Cassian’s innocent question. She wasn’t expecting him to pry for details because no one ever pries into her life, and she freaked out instead of rationally assessing the situation.
A part of her is satisfied now, having seen this coming from a mile away. It happens with everyone she meets, when she says or does something wrong and inevitably pushes them away. Maybe she should keep pushing him away, and keep him at arm’s length for the rest of her time here.
A larger part of Nesta is embarrassed at having caused a scene, and worse, mentioning Tomas. Because that’s exactly where her mind went when Cassian asked that question— to the man who used to say he loved her, but who never truly liked her. Intrusive memories from years past attack Nesta until the sky outside turns a light gray: dressing up for fancy business events and having his arm wrapped around her waist in an illusion of affection. Him pinching her side hard enough to make tears spring to her eyes when nobody was looking and leaning into her ear to lovingly whisper everything wrong with her that night. Going home and having makeup sex.
She’s still flustered from Cassian and can’t keep the thoughts out as well as usual. When she finally does drift off into a restless imitation of sleep, it’s by holding her thumb to her wrist until the steady beat of her pulse soothes her worn nerves.
Nesta wakes up cramping.
It takes her a few moments to pull out of the fog of sleep and recognize the feeling, and she groans aloud. This can’t be happening to her right now.
She was stupidly hoping that her period would hold off until she moved back into her apartment. Her premenstrual cramps are telling her she has two days at most.
She refuses to go through that experience in the same house as Cassian. Her family doesn’t even like being in the same house as her when she’s on her period. Her ex would outright leave their apartment and stay at a friend’s until she got over it. So this…
She groans once more and pulls herself out of bed. A quick phone check tells her it’s only been three hours since she fell asleep, but she’s given up at this point.
Nesta tiptoes hesitantly out of her room, not wanting to face Cassian just yet. It’s only when she reaches the stairs that she realizes the house is unusually quiet, even though it’s almost eleven.
Frowning, Nesta pads into the kitchen to find two things: a covered dish sitting on the island and a green sticky-note stuck to the fridge. She goes for the note first.
In messy handwriting it reads: Went out for groceries. Text me if you need anything. Beneath the words is a dark, almost furious scribble of ink, as if Cassian had written something there only to forcefully scratch it out.
Without overthinking it, she gets out her phone and texts Cassian that she needs pads. It only occurs to her after she’s sent the message that that’s probably not enough information.
Having Cassian know Nesta is on her period is one thing, but him knowing the size of her pad? The heaviness of her flow? She might need to enforce that rule about him never speaking to her again.
In her best attempt to not be viewed as a walking blood gusher, she asks for a smaller size pad than usual and turns her phone all the way off so she can’t see any replies.
Once you’re out of this house you’ll never have to see him again, so it won’t matter if you’re the rude bitch who cried and bled a lot while she was staying at his place.
Going over to the kitchen island, she uncovers the plate she assumes is for her. She isn’t expecting anything much, maybe Cassian’s leftovers from breakfast, so she hesitates when she sees a full stack of chocolate chip pancakes. Carefully decorated with berries and syrup, they’ve long gone cold, but— still.
Nesta reaches out as if they might not be real, or not meant for her, but nothing happens. Mouth tightening, she snatches the plate and grabs a fork.
Cassian comes in through the kitchen door twenty minutes later, long after Nesta’s cleaned off her food and washed the dishes in the sink. He throws her a smile as he shakes snow out of his hair and sets down the bags of groceries on the island by Nesta’s laptop.
“Oh, is it snowing already?” She throws a concerned glance outside, not having noticed while she was working.
“It’s light for now, but it won’t be for long.” He starts taking off his coat, and Nesta gets up to help with the groceries. She quickly finds the bag holding her stuff and discreetly sets it aside, but then Cassian grabs another bag and upturns it, its contents sprawling all over the island. “I don’t know what your period’s like, but we’re gonna be snowed in for a while so I got some of everything just in case.” He looks hesitant.
“Oh— thank you,” she says, overwhelmed. There’s three different types of painkillers, all that she already owns, and ten different types of junk food. And they're all for her. Nesta plucks up a package, stunned. “How are gummy worms supposed to help me on my period?”
Cassian leans his elbows on the marble and shrugs. “They’ll make you happy.”
“I’m allergic to gelatin.”
His face falls. “Oh.”
But Nesta just places the gummies in front of him and starts sorting the rest of the stuff. All the chocolates end up on her side, and the candies and gum and hot chips on Cassian’s side. When she's done, she finds him watching her closely. “Did you want some chocolate?” She offers out a Twix bar, her favorite. “I can trade you.”
“Uh, sure.” He accepts her Twix in exchange for his Hot Cheetos.
Silence ensues as Nesta tears open a Toblerone package and breaks off a triangle of nougat, when she remembers she has to tell him something.
“Thank you.” Her words are out of place and out of nowhere, spoken during the wrong time mark of a film and ruining the rhythm of the scene. Despite this, she powers on. “Thank you for breakfast, but also for this. Thank you for everything, really.”
Cassian perks up. “Did you like breakfast?”
Nesta nods through a mouthful of chocolate. “Chocolate chip pancakes are my favorite, and you’re good at making stuff.”
He raises a dark brow. “You mean cooking?”
“Same thing.”
“Well, I’m glad you liked it.”
Nesta slumps in relief, thinking her necessary talking points are over with. She's thanked him for shopping and for breakfast. What more could be— damn.
She clears her throat, even though she doesn't know what to say yet. She won't apologize— she doesn't know if she's physically capable of it, to be honest, but she can still seem regretful.
“Are we over last night?” she says bluntly. So much for regretful.
Cassian seems startled that she's even brought it up, which is perhaps a good sign that he already forgot about it. “Of course,” he says. “Nesta, I really didn't mean to offend you—”
Oh god, he’s not over it. “Don't apologize,” Nesta demands, throwing her hands up to ward him off. “You didn't even do anything, why would you apologize?”
“Well, you looked upset,” he says seriously. Cassian’s apologetic face looks an awful lot like hurt, though Nesta doesn't know why he would possibly feel hurt. Still, she has to pin her stare to the dark cabinets so he can't hurt her in turn. He keeps talking. “I know I promised to push your boundaries, but I never want to hurt you.”
His sincerity is more than disarming; it makes her ache.
“And I hated not talking to you last night.”
That gets Nesta's attention, and she suddenly feels two things at once: a swoop of joy that he likes talking to her, and a heavy drop of guilt that she ignored him all last night, even when he knocked on her door and apologized profusely.
“I fell asleep early,” she decides to lie. “I wasn't ignoring you.”
Cassian smiles softly and reaches out to brush a thumb over the tired circles under her eyes. “I can tell,” he says.
She's gone dead still, but she doesn’t flinch. She doesn't even want to flinch. Cassian clears his throat and drops his hand, and Nesta’s eyes follow him closely. “We’re good,” she says in finality. “Let’s go back to normal now.”
Cassian nods, his face carefully blank. “Okay. Then stop stuffing your face and help me with the rest of the groceries.” He moves off the island and elbows her on the way.
That makes Nesta smile, which makes Cassian smile even harder, and just like that, they’re back to normal.
***
a/n: two things: 1) cassian definitely texted feyre that morning and asked what nesta’s favorite breakfast was, and 2) can you tell im in love with writing nesta archeron?
tagging: @ladywitchling @sjm-things @thewayshedreamed @drielecarla @sensitiveillyrian @superspiritfestival @aliveahaahahafuck @cupcakey00 @sayosdreams @rainbowcheetah512 @claralady @thebluemartini @nessiantho @missing-merlin @duskandstarlight @lucy617 @sleeping-and-books @awesomelena555 @julemmaes @wickedqueenoffantasy @poisonous-bloom @observationanxioustheorist @gisellefigue08
237 notes · View notes
ticklishfiend · 3 years
Text
Angry Little Guy
My Hero Acadameia - Kirishima/Bakugou
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A/N: heyyy haven’t written in a hot minute (again lmao)!! my mental health has been taking a tolls recently so writing has been hard, but i still hope y’all enjoy what i wrote today!! i love these boys sm and i hope to write some more for them in the future :) hope u enjoy!! xx
Summary: After Ms. Joke visits the school and forces Bakugou to laugh after he was being a grumpy-butt in class, Kirishima can’t help that he just wants to hear that cute little laugh again. But when Bakugou refuises to laugh any other way, Kirishima decides to use some...persuasive methods :))
Word Count - 2,550
Today was a physical training day for Class 1A, all the students gathering in the training gym in their matching blue and red outfits ready for whatever task Aizawa had prepared for them that day. Aizawa’s demeanor today, however, was just a little…off. Sure, he was being hs regular boring, monotonous self, but something about the way his eyes seemed to sink deeper into their sockets, and the way his back seemed somehow more slouched than usual, showed that the class’s teacher was a little more annoyed today than he already was regularly.
“Does Aizawa-Sensei seem more…upset than usual?” Kirishima scratched his neck worriedly, heck cocked as he watched Aizawa pinch the bridge of his nose.
“I don’t know, man, the guy’s never exactly been the bubbly type. Maybe he just got less sleep than normal,” Denki shrugged, his eyes also meeting the groggy teacher stood in front of their whole class. “What do you think, Bakugou? Think Aizawa woke up on the wrong side of the bed or what?”
“Shut the fuck up, Sparkplug, he’s about to start class,” Bakugou grumbled, not even glancing down at his bright blonde counterpart for a second.
“Okay everyone, it’s time to shut up,” Aizawa spoke loudly, his eyes tense as he stared the teens in front of him down. The mumbles in the room went silent as Aizawa began his lesson. “Today’s gonna be a little…different. Despite my pleas against this, you’ll be taught your training by a different pro-hero today from Ketsubutu High.”
Muffled whispers slowly rose up from the crowd of teens before Aizawa, mumbling predictions of who the hell could be teaching them today and why it wasn’t someone already from their school. Of course, as always, Iida’s hand was the first to shoot up and question this strange decision.
“Aizawl-Sensei, why are we being taught by a teacher from another school? Why not use any of the many teachers we have available at UA?”
“Unfortunately, Nezu believes it would be best for you all to not only be trained by the same heroes, as you need to widen your options for training techniques, especially considering many of you need to learn better techniques of distraction. Which is exactly why they’ve brought in-“
“Helloooo~!” The gym doors behind the students’ burst open, a female figure standing in the doorway with her hands on his hips and a bright, wide smile imprinted on her face.
“Oh no way!” Sero pointed excitedly towards the woman. “It’s Ms. Joke!”
“That’s right, future pro-heroes!” Ms. Joke began making her way over toward Aizawa, his glare on her intensifying with every step she got closer.
“Ohhh, now I get why he’s been so moody all morning,” Kiri whispered to Denki, the two sharing a knowing glance as they both grinned.
“Joke, why are you so late? You were supposed to be here an hour ago so we could discuss-“
“Oh cmon, Eraser, don’t be so serious! Just got caught up in a little morning traffic is all, plus spreading a few smiles along the way!” Joke grinned widely at the stoic man beside her. “Y’know, I’m always happy to spread a few more smiles as long as they’re coming from your cute little face-“
“That’s enough, Joke. Please get on with the lesson,” Aizawa rolled his eyes, refusing to look over at his extremely smiley counterpart.
“Whatever you say, future husband!”
“Not your future husband-“
“Okay guys! So who here knows about my quirk and can explain it properly to the rest of the class?” Joke asked, followed by multiple hands shooting up into the air, Deku’s even waving about excitedly (as this IS his favorite thing in the world to discuss).
“Hmm…how about…you! Mr. Grumpy in the front!” Joke exclaimed, pointing towards Bakugou. His arms were crossed in contempt, eyes glaring into Joke’s happy persona like his gaze alone could burn right through it.
“I didn’t even raise my hand,” Bakugou scowled at his higher-up, his stance never wavering. “How do you know I have any idea who you are?”
Ms. Joke smirked at Katsuki. “Y’know, teachers talk, Bakugou,” the mention of his name made his eyes grow a little wide in surprise, not expecting her to know him by name. “Sure, I know you from the sports festival, but I also know you from a little more than that. I know that you’re an angry little guy who doesn’t like not being at the top, and you find satisfaction in knowing more than your peers. I also know you’re very smart, and you’re well educated on the status of most- if not all- pro-heroes today.  So, I’ll ask again; can you please explain to the class what my quirk is and how it functions?”
A silent but stressed pause fell over the group of teens. None of them had expected Joke to get so analytical on Bakugou like that, and it made them all feel a little fearful of what the “angry little guy” had to say next to her next. Bakugou’s glare on the woman deepened, his brow furrowing slightly.
“You can make people laugh uncontrollably, basically making it easier for you to fight them with one-on-one combat. And if you want me to be honest,” Bakugou’s face contorted into an ugly smirk, his arms crossing tighter as his body leaned in ever so slightly towards the hero. “-it’s one of the lamest quirks I’ve ever seen from a pro-hero.”
The air in the room was suddenly 10x thicker than before, almost making it harder for the students to catch a healthy breath. Ms. Joke only smiled fondly at the teen before her, walking closer to him until they were face-to-face.
“Y’know Bakugou…ever since I saw you perform at the sports festival, seeing you so red-faced and angry the whole time, I couldn’t help but wonder…” Joke’s hands went to her hips as Bakugou’s smirk slowly began to fade. “…does that guy ever really laugh?”
Suddenly and without warning, Bakugou began belting out one of the screechiest laughs anyone in that gym had ever heard in their lives. His arms came down to his stomach, harshly crushing his abdomen as if this would cease the laughs at any capacity. After a second, one of his hands shot towards his mouth, after he must’ve finally realized how embarrassingly girly his laugh must’ve sounded.
“Oh my god, no way! Bakugou can laugh!” Denki shouted, pointing at the hysterical boy in front of him. The rest of the class erupted into giggles, unable to contain it after hearing that contagious laugh leave that angry little man.
“SHUHUHUT UHUP! THIS ISN’T FAHAHAHAIR!” Bakugou’s screams were muffled behind his hand, but it did nothing to mask the laughs coming out of the boy.
“So, is anyone who didn’t know about my quirk starting to get how it works?” Joke giggled, Bakugou now crumbling to the floor on his knees without even meaning to. After another moment, his laughs began to die down to soft titters, before standing back up on shaky legs. To his dismay, his face was flushed an adorable shade of pink, and though everyone noticed it, no one dared to make a comment. His eyes made their way to Joke’s, an angry flash of light glaring from them.
“YOU MADE YOUR POINT YET, HAG?!” Bakugou shouted, his hands in a combat position by his sides, making small explosions not big enough to hurt a fly from his palms.
“Yes, actually. I think we’re ready to move on to the lesson at hand!”
-
“Man, I still feel sore after training today. Who knew Ms. Joke could be so ruthless at hand to hand combat!” Kirishima exclaimed, massaging his shoulder before turning back to his homework in his lap. He was sat crisscross on Bakugou’s bed, with said explosive teen leaning against the wall behind him also working on his homework.
“Whatever, Shitty-hair, it wasn’t that bad,” Bakugou rolled his eyes, earning him a shove on the knee from the red haired teen beside him.
“You’re just mad she had you laughing like a little girl in front of the class and you KNOW it!” Kiri chuckled.
“Hell yeah I’m mad, I’m fucking pissed! That hag had no right to do that, it made me look like a fucking idiot!” Bakugou grumbled throwing his head back and hitting the wall with a thud.
“Oh cmon, it wasn’t that bad, it was adorable! You should totally laugh like that more often, Bakubro. I know I’d sure love to hear it,” Kiri giggled, looking up at Bakugou, noting the small tinge of crimson painting his cheeks. He decided to be nice and not say anything, just like he had been at training.
“I’m not adorable, fuckface, and after that whole stunt I don’t think I’ll ever laugh again.”
“Bakubro, you know I can’t have that! I’ve gotta get my dose of Kats giggles every once and awhile, even if I have to pull em outta ya!” Kiri snickered, playfully shoving Bakugou in the shoulder. “In fact, I wanna hear you laugh right now! Cmon, gimme them giggles!”
Bakugou just looked up at Kirishima with the most blank expression he could possibly pull. Kirishima pouted, grabbing his and the other boy’s homework and moving it to the other side of the bed.
“Shitty-hair, I was working on that-!”
“Ah ah ah, Bakubro, you can get right back to your work as soon as I hear that laugh of yours that I heard earlier today!” Kirishima moved to sit cross-legged in front of Bakugou, giving him the dopiest smile he could pull in hopes to get the boy to giggle even a little.
Nothing.
“Kiri, I can’t just laugh on command. You’ve gotta do something funny, and you’re not a funny fucking person,” Bakugou’s expression remained partially blank, but Kirishima could spot that hint of mischievousness behind his eyes that got him all worked up and playful.
“Hmm…well, while I might disagree with you on that, it’s really hard to make you laugh. And trust me, I know that from experience,” Kirishima brought his hand up to scratch at his chin, looking Bakugou in the eyes experimentally. Then, a lightbulb went off over Kiri’s head.
“Hey, Bakugou?”
“Um…yes?”
“Are you ticklish?” Bakugou remained unwavered, but Kirishima could tell that question made the blood boy uneasy.
“No. Can I get back to my work now, Shitty-hair?”
“I already told you, we aren’t working until I hear you laugh. And, I don’t believe you.”
“Well you should, because I’m not.”
“Then can I?” Bakugou furrowed his brows confusedly at the question.
“Can you what?” Bakugou asked, his head leaning back in confusion.
“Can I tickle you? Y’know, since you aren’t ticklish.”
“No, that’s a stupid question, why would you tickle someone who isn’t-“ suddenly, Bakugou’s words halted as Kirishima grabbed the boy by his shoulders and turned him to push his back onto the bed. He sat down on the boys waist, pinning his hands beneath his knees, effectively trapping them. “WHAT THE HELL, SHITTY-HAIR?!”
“What? You said you aren’t ticklish, so this-“ Kirishima pulled Bakugou’s shirt up just above his lower ribs, before lightly and slowly tracing shapes into the boys sides. “-shouldn’t bother you at all.”
Bakugou’s entire body was as stiff as a board, his eyes shut tight and his mouth shut even tighter. His teeth grinder against one another and titter after titter left his lips against his mind’s wishes.
“Kiri- I- Stop- hehe-wait, just hold on a minutehehe-“ Bakugou giggled lightly, his hands struggling beneath Kiri’s knees. Then, Kirishima began digging his fingers into his ribs, and that’s when all hell broke loose for the explosive boy beneath him.
“WAHRHEIT! STOHOHOHOP! NOT FAIR! NOT FAHAHAHAIR!” Bakugou twisted and turned his body, but to absolutely no avail. Kirishima was massaging circles into Bakugou’s lower ribs, and the hysterical boy under him just couldn’t take it. “See? Now THIS is what I wanted to hear, Bakubro!” Kirishima moved his right hand down to skitter his nails on the boy's lower belly, resulting in high pitched squealy giggles to leave the Bakugou's lips. "Aw, you're so ticklish! I never expected this from you, it's so cute!" Kirishima cooed, only making Bakugou's laughs to grow more frantic and panicked.
"NOHOHO! NOHOHOT CUHUHUTE! NOT CUHUHUHU- AHAHAHA!" The boy's words trailed off into even more giggles as Kirishima brought his left hand down to sueeze at his hips. "NOHOHOT THEHERE! PLEASE! I CAHAHAHANT!"
"Aww, is this a bad spot, Bakugou?~ Is it really ticklish right there?~" Kirishima teased, now moving both hands down to sueeze and spider over his hips, which proved to be one of his worst spots so far.
"YEHEHES! TIHIHICKLES!" Bakugou screamed, his legs kicking out frantically behind Kiri as the red-head experimentally moved his fingers upwards and dipped into his bellybutton.
Bakugou let out the most high pitched scream Kirishima had ever heard.
"Oh my god, dude! Is it that bad here?" Kirishima used one nail to scratch at the inside walls of the navel, while another finger skittered around the entire button.
"BAHAHAHAD! SO BAHAHAD! PLEHEHEASE!" Bakugou whined, small prickles of tears forming in the corners of his eyes.
"Alright, alright, i'll quit. But-" Kirishima halted momentarily, his nails resting on Bakugou's lower tummy without moving. Even with the lack of movement, Bakugou couldn't help the small giggles that left his lips, his childish giggle box already turned on it's head, making those unmoving nails feel like their skittering all over his tummy. "-first you have to admit that your laugh is adorable."
Bakugou's eyes widened. "What?! Are you crazy?! I'm not gonna say something like th-hehehe!" Kirishima slowly began skittering over his lower tummy again, his fingers slowly but surely getting closer and closer towards his navel.
"Bakugou, you are way too ticklish to just not comply with me right now. Just say what I want and I'll let you go," Kirishima smiled, bringing one hand up to skitter at his lower ribs, resulting in a surprise shriek and louder giggles from the boy. "Unless...you don't want me to stop?"
Bakugou's entire face turned beet red, and this time Kirishima just couldn't help himself. "Aw, Bakugou~! Y'know, you're way more of a blusher than you'd like to admit, but that's just another thing that makes you intesnely adorable. So say it! Say you're adorbale!"
"Nohoho! I cahaha- Kiri plehehease! Don't make mehehe!" Bakugou whined, twisting his body as if trying to escape the unstoppable fingers on his torso.
"Cmon Kats~ Just say those two magic little words~"
"Alrihihight!" Bakugou shut his eyes tight, turning his face as much as he could to try and smush his words into the mattress. "I'm...I'm adorablehehe..."
Kirishima finally halted his fingers and moved them off the boy's body, but still not getting up off of his waist. "See? Was it that hard?"
"Yes!" Bakugou whined, finally pulling his hands out from under Kirishima's legs after the red-head gave him some leverage to, shoving them into his face to mask the ever-growing blush and smile emerging.
"You're too cute for me, Kats. I don't think I can handle it," Kirishima smiled fondly at the boy underneath him, his heart swelling in his chest unbeknownst to that angry little giggly guy.
-
A/N: i hope u enjoyed!! i just love lee!bakugou so i rlly couldn’t help myself LMAOO he’s so cute wtf :(( anyways, if u enjoyed this pls consider liking and reblogging!! reblogging is much more appreciated as it helps spread my fic to more ppl :)) love u!! xx
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urlocalnctstan · 3 years
Text
𝚃𝚒𝚍𝚎 𝚘𝚏 𝙷𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚜
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Genre : Angst, Fluff, Slow-burnish, Idol AU
Pairing : Jaehyun x Reader ft.Mark (other members too)
Warning(s) : strong language, age-gap, mature contents, weird writing style lmao, uh what else? idk but yeah
Disclaimer :The story is completely fictitious, idol-fan relationships are not common so some of you crazy ones out here, pls don’t get too delusional, your oppas will be your oppas only virtually, not in real life.
Playlist : Youtube Link / Written
Word Count : 5.4k
Summary : ‘Time and tide waits for none’- a quote that is universally accepted and believed. You both had had your experience of meeting the right one at the wrong time, the concept of love long forgotten after the sudden downfall of your relationship together. But will time eventually heal everything for you both?
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The car came to a halt, your mind subconsciously drifting back to the humiliation you faced tonight back at the office.
“ARE YOU FUCKING DUMB, Y/N?” your boss was a fuming mess, his whole office scattered with the documents you had brought just a few moments ago. At the sight of the shredded papers, you felt you heart clench. You worked so hard for this project, disregarding God knows how many nights of your sleep. The feeling of abomination was slowly creeping up from the pit of your stomach towards the man who stood taut, seething in rage.
“HOW MANY TIMES DID I TELL YOU TO JUST DO WHAT THEY ASKED YOU TO?” He yelled, his fist furiously banging on his wooden desk, beneath his hand rested some pieces of the torn documents.
“Sir, even you know how risky it is to design as they asked to. If a blunder happens it is our company that is to be held accountable, not theirs.” you knew it was pointless to reason with the stubborn headed prick, but you had to try out your luck.
“Get out. Out, out, out. Get your fucking face out of my face.” He swished his index finger repeatedly, letting out a frustrated shriek just as I was about to exit his office. His wrath was nothing new in the office, as all the other employees shot me a rather pitying look when they saw me exiting the team leader’s office with hands full of ripped papers. Wow, my 2 weeks worth of sleep. Just wow. You didn’t bother to reciprocate their sympathetic glances, storming out of the corridor as you furiously started clicking the floor to your cabin. The jabbing of your finger on the glowing button that read ‘13’ was the only sound that resonated in the fairly empty area, earning annoyed looks from the two individuals who stood right behind you.
“Ah, fuck.” You banged your head against the steering, recalling the even as you clutched the handles harshly. “Why,” another bang. “do I,” bang. “live like” bang. “this,” bang. You could feel your face was burning without even touching it, streams of tears flowing down. Just as you were about to give yourself another bang, the sudden honk of a car made you pause amidst your ritual. Indeed all motherfuckers love to test my patience. You decide to ignore the rider, mainly because you were also partially at fault for resting in your car in the middle of the park. You twisted the metal keys as the ignition went off, signaling your car was ready to flee. Yet again, you were distracted by soft knocks. You prayed to God to help you not lose your shit, at this point you were questioning if He ever hears your woes at all. The soft knocks stop immediately when you started to pull down the window, the person straightening only crouch again.
“Y/n?” his called out unsurely, as if he were afraid of mistaking you for someone else. You knew that voice, and that is not good news. Shit.
“Mark?” you were surprised to say the least, not expecting to run into an old friend. “Oh my god! How have you been?” You shoot out of your driver’s seat, instantly being engulfed into a bone crushing hug by the male.
“I have been good. Oh god, I can’t believe this! I can’t believe I ran into you after so long!” Mark still held you tight your embrace, the sudden reunion making him feel giddy with excitement.
“Yes indeed,” you were the first to pull out from the hug. You took a moment to study him; black mask covering half of his face as he smiled widely, eyes crinkled and the signature cheekbones still the same as they were in the past. God, it’s really been so long. “What are you up to these days?”
“Er,” Mark scratched his head as he laughed nervously, unsure if he was allowed to give you spoilers about his new album. “I have been working on my solo album actually.” 
“Are you for real?” You found yourself hugging Mark again at the joy of his successful career. “I’m so so proud of you mate!”
“Thank you, thank you,” Mark swayed you lightly, his voice muffled due to the mask he wore. Mark was the one to pull out now, still keeping your caged as he placed his hands on your shoulders. “In no way I am gonna let you leave without a trace again,” he almost groaned.
“Promise, I won’t anymore,” you signaled to the stack of files that rested on the backseat of your car. “They won’t leave me alone.”
“I’ll just ask your boss to assign you with more tasks then,” he giggled mischievously, earning a light smack from you at the mention of such an absurd idea.
“I’ll track your way to hell to kill you again if you do something like that,” you hissed at Mark, who was still giggling at your frustrated reaction. The atmosphere became quiet as Mark looked up in the vacant sky, deep in thoughts while you waited for him to continue. Your phone buzzed against your leather coat.
[From Bullhead] : Don’t think I am overlooking your mess. This is the first and final warning from me.
You shivered, half from the cold and half from the text you just received.
“26th, sharp at 8 PM, my place.” He snapped his fingers, hooting at the realization of having a free day in his busy scheduled life.
“Okay, done.” You should have refused, you thought. But for some reason, you found yourself agreeing to his offer, you felt both sad and guilty for disappearing out of your friend’s life without a trace. However, you couldn’t ignore the greedy feeling you felt, the want to see him again. “I think I should be done around...7:30? So I think I’ll be able to make it.” You unlocked and handed him your phone.
“You have to make it,” his eyes focused on the screen of your device, swiftly typing what you assumed was him number. “Just incase, text me if I happen to forget - no I know that look, Y/n, you must text if that happens..” He rolled his eyes, knowing that how much you would be overthinking about possibly tiring him because of his busy lifestyle. Mark dialed his number from your phone before handing it back to you. You visibly snickered at the name he saved his contact with : ‘My Boo MarkLee <3’ 
“Stop pretending as if you never renamed my existence as Markie Boo,” he groans, remembering how this has been his another one of the hundred pet names he had. Your conversation was cut mid way as his phone loudly vibrated in his phone, swiftly pulling it out as the guy whined in annoyance.
“Yo, I gotta go now I guess, something came up at the company.” He looked sad, pouty. “See you around, yeah?” You were pulled into another hug by the male, he surely loved to hug as usual.
“Yes, yes. Now go. Don’t be late.” You patted his back, pulling out of the hug and shooing him away towards his car.
“See ya, Mom.” He beamed as he sped off with his car. 
“Dumbass.” You muttered, softly laughing at the name he would always call you by, despite being years younger than him. You rounded around your car, getting inside. The start was bad but the end was good nonetheless. The keys of your car jiggled as you closed the door. Again, you twisted the keys, your mood slightly better than before for which you were grateful. Your car’s ignition blared, as you positioned towards the exit of the park, subtly muttering ‘long ass ride.’
The digits ‘7:37’ glowed on the the small digital clock beside your desktop. You felt stiff, stretching your neck as your bones made those cracking noes. You stare at your toes, zoning out was your passion and you excelled at it. You snapped straight, letting out a deep sigh as you started to scheme the projects before you were to hand them over to your bullhead boss. Soon enough, you were done, muttering almost too loudly for everyone that you wished your boss would be napping off instead of being awake.
Good for you, your prayers were answered for the first time in a while. You quietly placed the files that contained all the details that needed to be checked again by your boss, quietly making your way out of his cabin as soon as possible. On you way, you informed his secretary you were leaving, her face wore distraught and annoyance but softens as she saw you approaching. Sometimes you felt sympathetic towards her, often asking the heavens to bless her with utmost patience and perseverance to deal with the bullhead.
The marble floor clicked with every step you took, the sounds eerily audible in the serene lobby. It was very rare for the lobby to be filled with people in evening, the employees would practically sprint off their seats as soon as the clock hits 7. You made your way out of the building, making a mental note to buy a gift for Mark on your way back to home. What would he like? Take outs? Homemade? Wine? You drove across the street before halting your car in front of the department store that was situated just a few blocks away from your office. The header of the store glowed, the alleys seemingly half-crowded with people of different occupations you assumed. You let out a hiss as you felt a chill run down your spine, it was almost the end of Autumn which meant Winter was just round the corner. You decided to rely on your instincts, deciding to gift your friend a fancy bottle of wine despite having zero knowledge about it.
You were never quite the fan of wine. According to you, the seemingly alcoholic drink was too expensive, plus the etiquettes that came along for its consumption would always just make your turn your head away every time you laid your eyes across one. You schemed through the white shelves filled with different tastes and colors of wine, each hailing from various corners of the world. “How do I even spell it?” You crouched down a bit to a bottle that had caught your attention, the exquisite name was starting to make your head hurt. It’s probably a white wine you thought, the transparent color of the liquid was what made you convince. But something rather nostalgic caught your sight, before you could even realize, you found your fingertips caressing the cold glass bottle of the red liquid that you held now.
“If were to be a drink, then what would I be?” You lazily laid sprawled across the couch in the living, while you boyfriend who sat on the marble floor across fumbles with the knotted bunch of cables. Jaehyun had his gaze focus of the wire maze in his hands, eyebrows furrowed and lips pouted in immense concentration.
“Peach milk,” he smiled, unbeknownst to you he was actually implying a double meaning for his answer.
“And why that?” You felt his choice a bit amusing, not really expecting that as an answer.
“Because I love your ass and boobs,” he winked, only to be hit by a pillow that was resting beneath your curled legs. Jaehyun felt himself giggling by your reaction, it was cute to see you being annoyed. “Babe, c’mon. I can’t lie about it.” 
“Never mind, just forget it.” You started to get a bit pissed, hurt as well because your sensitive ass thought he would probably say something sweet that would make you heart flutter. 
“Peach milk is my favorite, that’s the main reason why,” Jaehyun shifted his focus back to the cables, the last two knots were too adamant to let go of each other. You felt yourself smiling, too wide, he definitely knew you well. Cheeky bastard.
“What about me?” he asked, eyes still focused as he working on untying the last knot.
“Hmmm...” you shifted your position on the couch, now sitting up as you stared your boyfriend’s figure for a short while.
“Red wine.” sophisticated, classy, unique, warm. If you were to describe the aura around him, these would be the first choices.
However, your answer seemed to have caught Jaehyun’s attention, pausing in his tracks as he got curious as to why the specific choice. He had a huge grin on his face, he adored how you remembered the specific detail of red wine being his favourite, for he mentioned it in your first date which was 2 years back. But he knew there was more to it. He knew you too well. “But why red wine?”
You kept your gaze fixated on Jaehyun as he gets up from the ground, putting the cables in a secure manner to avoid another tie war. He hugged the pillow tight which you had previously thrown on him, before propping down beside you on the couch with a tired sigh, looking at you intently. It was as if you both were having a staring contest. So you rested your head on your right hand, both staring each other with soft smiles before you continued.
“You are much more to what everyone thinks you are,” you notice how Jaehyun cocks an eyebrow, still staring and trying to process what you just said.
“Just like wine, the more I know you, the more I know just how amazing you are. Both sweet and sour, but the balanced ratio of it is what makes you more admirable.” You admired how he was always able to balance things out, prior to what everyone believes about him, he had both good and bad sides to him. And that’s what made him more human, him acknowledging his flaws. That’s what made you fall for him.
Hearing you, Jaehyun thought he might dislocate his jaw anytime soon for smiling so hard. His heart started to do all sort of flips, ears starting to pink. It was at times like this when you don’t need words to express how you were feeling, silent but the communication was still present. Jaehyun slides his hand into yours, you glanced at both of your intertwined fingers before looking at him, his eyes full of hearts for you. You giggled, feeling shy at his intense stare but returning him the same way.
“I love you,” he whispered, his starry eyes which were only looking at you.
“Excuse me miss,” You jolt at the sudden change of voice coming from behind you. You whip around, a girl probably in her late teens stood nervously, her hands fidgets with the belts of her backpack. 
“Miss, you were kinda in the way so..” you felt flustered for absent-mindedly drifting into your dreamland while shopping for your friend, chiding yourself mentally in the process.
“Ah, I am so sorry,” you moved swiftly to the side to allow the teen some space to carry out her shopping. “Please, carry on.” You smiled softly. Though at the back of your mind you wanted to point out how she shouldn’t be consuming alcohol, but disregarded the urge nonetheless. Sometimes children should get to enjoy their minimal amount of fun in their youth too. You were still clutching the red wine bottle in your hand, eyeing it one last time before placing it back in the racks. You cleared your throat, as if to let the voices speaking inside your head know that you are not a stupid 20 year old anymore. You shake your head, glancing around to inspect if others were judging your state before proceeding to the counter for the random wine you picked which might have cost you half of your monthly salary. It’s okay to spend once in a while.
Mark was literally running around his apartment. Running. His head shot up as he remembered something. “Shit, fuck, are the bathroom lights okay?” he murmured to himself, sprinting off to the bathroom that was located in his vast living room first, followed by the ones in his bedroom and guestroom. Mark was still a newbie to the norms of living alone, him being a newborn living-alone man for sparsely 2 months. And he would barely be home due to his schedules. There were even times he would just forget his own bedroom.
“What else, what else,” he glanced over the whole area eyes drifting here and there before he realized something. Dumbass forgot to check if there were even enough food for two. Mark quickly scurried to the kitchen counter, the utensils were more than enough before checking his fridge. Beers? Check. Soju? Check. Kimchi? Check. Slices of chicken breast? Check. But the 33 year old still felt something was missing. Mark shifted his focus on the wooden shelf that was just above the kitchen sink, the transparent glass door of it making a creak sound as he opened it. For an apartment who’s owner was barely home, the shelf was definitely well packed and organized. It contained all sorts of ramen, tteokbokki and any other fast food you could name. “What else, what else, what else, what else,” he kept chanting, as if by some magic his chants of short memory would be heard and he would know what else was he missing out. He hunched over the lower shelf to inspect if all the sauces his housekeeper stores for him were present there. Absorbed in his thoughts, Mark did not notice the sudden sound of his bell going off, before the sounds just got repeated and even more louder. 
“What the fuck?” his eyebrows creased in annoyance, cussing out all the profanities he had in his vocabulary at the visitor’s insolent mannerism. Mark was beyond pissed, the person behind the other side of the door not only disrupted his memory battle but also had the audacity to ring the bell like a 3 year old in the middle of the night. Instead of just answering from the intercom, he directly opened the entrance door. “Look, it’s like 11 in the night - Hyung?” Mark halted his rant session as he realized it was Jaehyun standing in front of his house. Covered in black shirt, black mask, black pants - black everything, it would take a while for others who did not know him personally to recognize the member of the top boy group in the industry.
“Were you shitting or something,” Jaehyun smiled before casually giving his best friend a hug. Mark pulls out some of the spare slippers he had stored, while Jaehyun sits on the wooden step as he unties the knots of his black adidas. As Jaehyun get ups, he looks over to the other male standing in front of him, then down at the slippers and then again to the male.
“What?” Mark laughed, his hands shifting to the sides of his waist.
“Mark, please don’t go shopping by yourself next time,” Jaehyun silently judged Mark for offering him the fluffly colourful pink body and yellow polka dots slippers, similar to the ones he was wearing but the combination in opposite. 
“I got them from the BOGO offer going on in the supermarket just down the lane,” Mark wiggled his toes under the furry layer of clothing, slightly humming at the texture. “Bro this shit comfortable and cute, you can’t deny that.”
Jaehyun gives him another look, amused at how his bandmate’s old habits were still the same. “I help you out with your fashion choices next time. Don’t worry.” He patted Mark’s should, a sympathetic grin on his face as he anticipated the other male’s dramatic reaction. 
“Oh please,” Mark scoffed. “More like you need my and Johnny hyung’s assistance for your monotonous wardrobe!”
Jaehyun laughed at his friend’s rebuttal before lazily propping himself on the bean sack in the living room with a low hum. Oddly enough, Mark’s apartment felt more homely than his own apartment which was just above a few floors.
“But what brings you here?” Mark walks over to his fridge, judging by his friend’s sudden visit, he knew drinks had become a necessary part of the night. “And what about Hayoung?”
“What about her?” Jaehyun raised his eyebrow at Mark, skillfully catching the beer Mark had tossed to him after asking about Hayoung, Jaehyun’s, well complicated girl something.
“I though you guys might just....I don’t know, be official or something.” Mark stole a glance towards his friend, nervously opening his can. The momentary pin drop silence was an indicator, he indeed blurted something he should not have. The fizzy hiss of the beer can being opened barely broke the ice.
“I don’t do things like official,” Jaehyun scoffed, producing a low sigh after sipping the beer. Mark decided not to further press his friend, despite having an old unresolved grudge against Jaehyun somewhere deep within him. It had been years since all of that had happened, but he still felt hostility creep up inside every time he remembers that night, that week, that month. After all, it was you that Jaehyun had completely broken, torn and ripped apart.
Unbeknownst to the rummaging thoughts inside the mind of his bandmate, it took a while for the older to realize how oddly clean and organized the apartment looked. Jaehyun turned to Mark, eyebrows raised with mischievousness coating his words. “You having someone for the night tomorrow?”
Mark almost made a disgusted face but instead opted to scrunch. “Bro, I don’t have Tinder, neither do I wanna be a carrier of STDs.” Mark placed his empty can on the small glass table, simultaneously letting out a tired huff. Jaehyun almost took an offense to the statement, the attack was definitely but indirectly made towards him. But he decided to shrug it off, Mark was not lying after all. Jaehyun did not even know half of the girls’ names he had slept with, someday or another mixing up names which ends in him getting kicked out or being cursed out. That was what had happened that night as well. 
“Okay, I forgot. Hayoung, yes. Speak.” Jaehyun shot an incredulous look to the younger, as if he was able to read his mind or something. Mark only furrowed his eyebrows at the reaction.
“I-I....got kicked out,” Jaehyun’s voice was barely above a whisper, but the sharp eared male was able to catch his friend’s low murmur. Mark stifled his giggle, only to receive a glare from his friend. Jaehyun ran his fingers through his newly dyed lilac hair. Fucking embarrassing.
“But what made her do that?”
Jaehyun felt chills run down his spine as the scenario replayed in his head. He shivered despite the heater being on, an amused Mark glancing while chugging down the small remaining amount of beer. Mark was being a gentleman trying to conceal his laughter as Jaehyun rambled how he managed to fuck up yet another good hook-up buddy. At this point, Mark was not even surprised. Victim to his obvious facial expressions, Mark hated lying, and equally hated being lied to as well. Jaehyun side glanced his friend, a loud annoyed snort escaping from him. “Having fun, aren’t you?”
“Well, I mean it’s fun — sorry,” Mark clears his throat. He should be the type of friend who gives advices instead of laughing. Mark wiggled in his seat, distorting the empty can before having a perfect shot in the trashcan just a few feet away from him. Smooth one.
“I think I might retire, or just quit after the current contract ends,” Jaehyun felt tight, the words came out from him in a way too suffocating form. Mark visibly tenses, his laidback posture now crouching forward to his friend. Mark was too pre-occupied in his escalating solo career, the support he had been getting even before the official stage was way too much for him to fathom, but he was grateful for it nonetheless. A stinging guilt crept up inside him, chiding himself of being such an inconsiderate friend. “It’s high-time I start to live on my own accord.”
Mark decided to rather not pressurize the half-drunk dude with his numerous questions as to why or what has made him to take such a step. Jaehyun struggled to keep his eyes open, exhaustion was taking over his body ever faster now that he had booze in his system. Jaehyun would have rather opted to just spend the night on the couch (he preferred Mark’s limited edition long L shaped sofa over any king sized bed) but the guy decided to not get welcomed by his mate as ‘good morning.’ Mark put a hand on Jaehyun’s knee, an attempt to stop the non-stop stomping which was a very well-known drunk habit of him. Piling the blankets he just brought, the younger warned again, eyes like red lazer lights before trudging towards his bedroom. 
Feet wobbly, Jaehyun struggles to drag his build to switch off the remaining lights in the living room, glancing throughout the long empty space. He gulped down harshly, the familiar empty feeling creeping back to him which he had been avoiding for so long — for years. Jaehyun took a deep sigh, the heavy feeling feeling weighing down his chest as he took light steps towards the big glass window which granted him the view of the whole city. His eyes flickered at the luminous sight. He felt big but small, full, content but numb and empty. 
“Hyung, you’re still awake?” a sleepy voice spoke from behind, breaking out Jaehyun from his trance. 
“Huh?” It took a moment for him to process an answer. “Uh yeah. just like that. You go sleep.”
Mark shrugged, walking towards his bed as Jaehyun plopped down harshly on the duvet, wincing slightly as he felt a sprain in his lower back. With the alcohol slowly losing its effect on him with each passing second, Jaehyun started to feel more sober, more drawn back into the reality. He hated it. This feeling he was feeling.
Mark was having a rather difficult time to fall asleep. He even put on a random sleeping eye mask he uses for travelling, but alas that did not help either. He was too giddy, too excited for tomorrow. Pulling up the blankets over his head, Mark was assured he was safe from everyone, even maybe from God as a huge grin breaks out on his face. As much as he hates to admit it, Mark loved how things turned out to be the way they were.
“Oh god, this is so awkward. Oh god can I please please just die already?” Mark halted on his steps at the voice, glistening in sweats after the recent stage. He thought it would be an adventure to opt for the public washroom in disguise since the green rooms’ ones were all occupied by the rest of the members; and boy, Mark was really giving his all hold his pee.  
“OH GOD!” the sudden yelp caused the male to shriek quietly, muttering an inaudile ‘jesus’. Despite the odds, Mark decided not to test his luck, holding in the bubbling feeling just before explosion as much as he could. Muttering quiet curses, the male struggled to hold his posture as he stealthily tried to get to the other side of the stairs. Too busy in his on the way to urination voyage, Mark realized it was too late, he bumped. Bumped into someone. A girl. Hell yeah fucked. Panic crept at the back of his throat as he anticipated what was coming forth. Him being surrounded by numerous fan as he desperately tries to hold his pee. What a fucking sight.
“Look, I know you might be a staff or something,” Mark whipped his head at your voice. “But please just oh god,” you rambled, leaving the man standing with his legs crossed tightly in utter confusion. “I had no idea — Mark Lee?”
The colors from his faced drained, Mark turned casper for a split second. 
“PLEASE!” he was quick to react, half-whispering as he desperately caught your hands. “Please don’t just, uh.., shout or something.”
You immediately raised your hands in defense. “I uh have no reason to do so?” You stated, observing how he was literally squirming, it did not take you long to understand that the canadian needed to go the washroom as soon as possible. ”Oh!” You quickly moved. “Sorry for blocking your way!” Before he could even say thank you, you disappeared without any trace. Mark made a quick mental note to thank you, well that only if he ever happens to cross paths with you again. And deep down, he wised he would. On the other hand, you let out another distressed growl, promising to all of the heavens that never will you be ever accompanying your cousin sister, or let alone come to any concerts from now on. The stunt your drunken cousin had pulled just a while ago was humiliating enough, but of course, she had to spice it up by vomiting on the hallways just in front of the green room. You silently prayed and hope with all your might that maybe they will be generous enough not to sue you or ask for compensation for the mess, looking around cautiously for any employees before you sprinted off for the exit door, and yes, dragging the passed out stunt lady.
Mark felt as if he had a halo above his head, the water balloon inside him finally set free. But he had to race when he saw his phone buzzing with notifications, all of them belonging to his manager or the group chat of the members chanting same syllables ‘Where are you’ ‘show starts in 2′ ‘get yo ass here’. It did not take the rapper too while before he reached the green room, the makeup artists and stylists immediately wrapping themselves around him with brushes and hair sprays. He was smiling, genuinely smiling as he replayed the encounter he just had. Johnny raised an eyebrow with an amused grin on his face. 
“What’s with the smile, bro?” Johnny pulls up some random exercises to relieve the tension in his muscles.
Instead of dodging his question, Mark replied, still smiling, but wider. “The pee voyage was a nice one.”
Johnny judged the younger for a second before chuckling and heading towards the stage. The loud noises from the fans echoed throughout the whole arena, full of green lightsticks gleeming like blossoming spring garden. No wonder I called them grass, Mark thought. But today, he was looking for a rather specific individual, his eye scanning almost all the faces in the crowd. He hoped to see you again, smiling gleefully as he performed, but thought that it was too greedy of him to want this much in a span of a day. And so he performed, for the first time without any pressure of doing good, enjoying every moment of the stage he was on and yet again, wished that maybe, maybe your paths will collide with his again.
.
.
.
part 2
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Empires on the Horizon XVI
Jason is a CEO: Part XVI
okay wow it has been a hooottt minute since i’ve updated a multi-chap fic and an even hotter minute since i’ve updated this one. so here’s a recap:
jase and zoe broke up, because she is being forced by her father to marry someone else (who that may be is yet to be revealed). jason has finally had enough and at the insistence of his friends he packs up on a holiday to Panarea (in italy) where he is delightedly shocked to discover Percy Jackson is currently working, and oh no.....would you look at that......the hotel messed up their reservations and now they have to share the same room, and the same bed. lmao they’re dorks.
here’s how the last chapter ended:
“Let’s just stay together? We’re friends. We know each other, we trust each other, and it’ll be less hassle than trying to find a room for either of us.”
“But there’s only one bed?” His brain was short-circuiting.
It shut down altogether when the man before him smirked. “Well i can keep my hands to myself, if you promise to.”
“I-” What is stopping him from saying yes? Why should he say no?
“It’s totally okay if you don’t want to.” Percy’s expression was so gentle, and it turned every weathered rock in Jason to gemstone.
“Yes.” He said firmly. “Let’s share the room.”
It was only when they got back to the hotel did Jason realise they were still holding hands. He wondered if they’d find each other like that in their dreams too. They did.
masterlist; my links
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Jason awoke to an arm slung over his waist and soft breaths fanning the bare skin of his back. Bright sunlight streamed through the windows, bringing with it the heat that was sure to get unbearable. He thought he’d feel uncomfortable with someone touching him in weather like this but Percy seemed to be cool, and gods did he look cute with his messy black curls, and brown skin that absorbed rays of light and turned it into magic.
They had promised each other that they’d keep to their sides of the bed and refrain from mauling one another in the night, but it seemed like they had gravitated together anyhow. And Percy was certainly a cuddler. 
A knock sounded and with groaning realisation he saw the clock on the wall read ten am. They were out later than either of them had realised. 
“Jackson,” He nudged the man gently, “I think you need to get up.”
A mumbled response sunk into his skin as soft lips brush against his back. Jason went completely still, the sensation running along his nerves like hot wires. 
“You okay?” Another mumble filtered through his delirium. 
“I’m fine,” He managed to choke out, “I think we need to get up though. Room service is already here.”
That sparked movement. Suddenly green eyes were wide open, and cheeks, streaked with the creases of the pillow, were red with panic. “What is the time?” 
“It’s ten am,” He pointed to the clock. 
“Fuck!” Percy practically leaped out of bed and slammed his shoulder into the door frame as he skidded into the bathroom.
Jason heard the shower go on, and an electric toothbrush whirr to life, and then he heard a multitude of curse words, a loud bang and some groans of pain.
“Er,” He should go in there and make sure his friend was still alive. “Jackson?” He stepped into the bathroom and was not at all prepared for the sight that greeted him.
There, tangled in his pants, toothpaste stains on his face, and the shower soaking the bathroom floor was Dr. Percy Jackson.
“Do you need help?”
“This is not how this morning was supposed to go,” The dark-haired man garbled, looking hopelessly at the mess he had created.
Jason hid a smile as he bent down to help tug Percy’s pants off him, “And how was the morning supposed to go.”
Green eyes clashed with his, the toothbrush still whirring in his mouth. “I was supposed to wake up early and order a buffet for breakfast and then as we stuffed ourselves-” he cut off, choking on the toothpaste. 
Jason couldn’t hide his amusement, and burst out laughing at Percy’s subsequent glare. Standing up and tossing the pants in the wash basket, he offered his hand to his friend, who took it gratefully before heading to the sink to finish brushing his teeth.
“What were we going to do while we ate?” He asked, leaning against the basin, one leg crossed over the other.
“I was going to feed you maple-covered waffles and answer some emails, and you were going to read that book I know you brought.”
“Are we an old married couple in this scenario?” He quirked a brow, lips twitching.
Percy frowned, stripping off his underwear and stepping into the heat of the shower. “I’m just trying to start our future early.” 
Jason watched those glorious back muscles ripple, as water streaked down, but he refused to follow its path, not daring to go lower than the small dip of that spine. He didn’t even know why he was still in the bathroom, why he was being such a creeper, but his feet were superglued to the floor. He couldn’t move even if a crowbar tried to pry him away.
“Are you not agreeing with my vision?” A muffled voice drifted around him.
He attempted to come back to reality but it was proving near impossible. “Uh no-” He stuttered, “I think it’s a solid plan.” His eyes traced the sharp angles of that jaw, and the strong-bridged nose, and black hair matted to beautiful brown skin. He was sure he was dreaming. There could be no other explanation for the surrealness of the moment.
“Jase?” Percy touched his arm gently, skin hot from the shower. “You okay?”
He startled into the world so fast he felt dizzy. Where on earth had he gone? To another dimension it seemed. “Oh gods i’m so sorry,” He groaned, dropping his face into his hands. “I just watched you shower like a complete pervert.”
His friend smirked, and then he was laughing. “Who says i didn’t enjoy it?”
The blush that raced across his skin was enough to dull rubies. He didn’t know where to look, or how to breathe, or what he was made of. He was simply an untied balloon barreling towards the nearest thorn bush. “You,” He managed to choke, “Are going to be the death of me doctor.”
“Good,” He heard the smirk like violins, “Maybe then I won't feel like I'm falling straight to the bottom of the ocean all by myself.”
Jason peeked through his fingers, watching as Percy finished up and flitted around the room, trying to still the heart that threatened to beat out his rib cage and into a drum set. It was an ache in his chest, how much he felt for this man. How much he wanted him.
“So i’m going to be in and out for the next few days but i’m going to work my butt off so i can have Thursday and Friday off. I’m sorry for being a terrible roommate but i don’t think i’ll make meals until then.” He could see the regret in the doctor’s eyes, turning that vibrant green a shade like dying leaves.
“No,” He shook his head, “Seriously it’s not a problem. You do what you have to.” He couldn’t believe his friend felt bad for leaving him, when they hadn’t even known they’d be here together. It said enough about Percy's character that Jason was trying very hard not to bundle the man up in blankets and kiss his cheeks until the guilt of the past stopped carving valleys between his brows. Instead he hugged him, accidentally letting his lips brush against Percy's neck, just above his collar as he pulled away. Accidentally. The squeeze at his waist let him know his accident was well received.
“Goodbye Jackson.” He smiled as he watched the doctor race down the hall. A ringed wave was the response before he disappeared around the corner.
Jason closed the door, leaning against it with an expression made from coffee foam and whipped cream. He couldn't imagine a morning as peaceful as that one, not in days, months, years? With a satisfied sigh he flopped back into bed, inhaling the ocean scent of Percy that lingered across the sheets like cool waters on a summer evening. The plan for the day was that there was no plan. Thalia had chosen well by booking this little place. He wouldn’t be distracted by touristy things ergo he couldn’t possibly do anything else but relax. So he snuggled into the pillows and stared at the ceiling and fell half asleep and listened to the wind and felt the heat creep across his skin and he just let himself be.
His thoughts were as wild as the tides and sometimes they spilled like ocean water across his cheeks. But then he’d drift off to a dream and wake up to the sound of people laughing and cars sputtering and footsteps stomping past his door and all of a sudden nothing felt too far away.
He was sad. He was sad enough to wonder if sadness was all he knew. His ex boyfriend, who he had loved like stars loved darkness, had broken down his dream and rebuilt it as a nightmare. He managed to wake up. His girlfriend, who he could have loved given time, had tied all the fraying parts of his heart to the wheel of a car and pressed accelerate. He managed to cut himself free. His girlfriend, who he had loved outright and bold, had danced him to the edge of a cliff and left him with one foot already going over. Had he managed to catch himself before reaching the bottom?
It was a question that kept him occupied through the day. Through the breakfast he ate slowly. Through the sleep he found restlessly when his mind wouldn’t focus on the book he’d brought. Through the very late lunch he gobbled down like his stomach would start a rebellion if it didn’t get it’s due. Through the golden sunset he sat at the window and watched.
But it was finally when he sunk to the floor of the shower, letting the water hit his back like welcome rain, that he had an answer; and with it the question of “What came next?” That answer, he knew, would come later. Clear and bright and ready to be grabbed with teeth and hands and love.
So he finished his shower, and changed into loose cotton pants and a shirt that he didn’t bother to button. A walk on the beach didn’t require formality.
The sand was soft on his feet, different to the way New York beaches felt. And the ocean was a richer blue, as if he were being introduced to colour for the first time and this was how water was supposed to look. He supposed places like this weren’t called paradise on earth for nothing. The last dregs of sunlight skittered across the water, as if playing with it. His fingers itched to paint the scene but with nothing but the sand at his fingertips he simply took in the view, and let his mind form the painting he couldn’t.
The air was cooler here, not as sticky, but that didn’t mean the heat wasn’t ever present, scorching the sand like coal hearths. His feet would be blistered if it weren’t so late into the evening. Any earlier and he may have been hopping around like a scared crab. The image was enough to make him giggle to himself. It’s a sound he misses, and one he loved enough to leave him smiling.
“Care to share, comedian?” A smooth voice called from behind him. 
He turned around, whipped faster than the wind, to see Percy walking towards him, a grin on his handsome face.
“I was picturing myself as a scared crab.”
Dark eyebrows raised in confusion, before rich laughter burst into the air. Jason swore it turned the night into magic. “Maybe I should have left you in peace.” The doctor shook his head. 
“Who says you’re disrupting it?” He tilted his head, before starting on his walk once more.
He didn’t see the look that crossed his friend’s face, like comfort turned to being.
“What did you do today?”
“Self reflection,” He said into the air, into the world, into himself. “How about you?”
“Oh you know, a little lab work here, a little analysis there.” Percy shrugged.
“Tell me more,” He prompted.
The look of surprise on his friend’s face made him want to throttle anyone who’s ever stopped this man from talking.
“You sure?” It was hesitant, it was heartbreaking.
“I can’t promise to understand everything so I may have questions but if you’re willing to indulge me I want to hear all about it.”
With a look that spoke of worlds beyond their comprehension Percy launched into a detailed play-by-play of his day. He answered every question with patience and sparkling eyes, and there were many questions. By the time they got back to their hotel the crescent moon was their only source of light in the inky blackness of the sky and his stomach was growling enough that he knew he couldn’t afford to snack for supper.
“Want to go to the restaurant for dinner?” He tilted his head to the opposite side of the lobby where grand doors opened and closed periodically. 
“I uh,” His friend winced, “I have some work today so i’m going to head to the room.”
“Okay,” He shrugged smiling, “I’ll meet you up there later.”
“Uh yea,” Percy’s face held an expression he didn’t quite know how to interpret. “See you then.”
“Want me to bring something up for you?”
“No, no, don’t worry about me.” Black curls bounced as he shook his head. 
They parted ways, Jason only slightly confused by the weird turn his friend’s mood took, and decided he’d bring back a chocolate brownie if nothing else.
As he sat down at a table, observing the grand balustrades and curtained windows he felt suddenly alone. It wasn’t a feeling he let himself be consumed by but just the fact that it was there had him reaching for his phone. With a few taps he was calling Leo, knowing it’d be early morning for them.
“Hello,” A cheery voice crackled through his earphone. It was enough to settle all the worried nerves hidden between his ribcage.
Their conversation was bright and energetic, Leo being a morning person; he even got a few grunts out of Annabeth, who was decidedly not. Everything was okay with his company and more importantly his friends were fine.
“I found a person we know here,” He mumbled, trying to keep his voice and excitement quiet.
“Who?” Leo was practically vibrating. Even Annabeth looked at the camera with blurry eyed curiosity.
“Uh Percy.” He scratched the back of his neck, shyness crawling across his skin.
“Oh,” His friend’s eyes widened. “What is he doing there?”
“Work,” This was fine. This was safe. Nobody was jumping to any conclusions.
“Are you sure you didn’t run away to get married?”
And there went all his hope of having reasonable friends. “No!” He hissed. “And besides I didn't run away, you guys forced me to go.”
“Well it’s done you good. I can finally see some colour in those pasty cheeks.” Brown eyes sparkled with mischief. 
Before Jason could respond another call was interrupting. “Zoe Nightshade” flashed across the screen.
“Uh Leo,” He frowned at his phone. “I’ll call you back.”
“Everything okay?” He heard the worry like tv static.
“I hope so.” The furrow between his brows didn’t disappear. 
And then he hung up on his best friend and answered the other call.
“Oh Jason,” Relief flooded in his ear like water in a drought. “Thank you for answering.” The smooth voice of his ex-girlfriend reached him.
“Zoe,” His nerves were bow-string taught. “What’s wrong? Why are you calling me?”
“I need your help.” She answered. She sounded desperate. “I can’t marry Octavian.”
Jason Grace nearly falls off the cliff.
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Allies + Canada and Axis + Prussia walking in on their toddler singing Disney songs while wearing a costume that matches that certain Disney movie (like for example Germany walks in on them singing I’ll make a man out of you and the toddler is dressed like Mulan, you decide the song the toddler sings that fits which country and who they’re dressed up as)
QwQ omg my favorite Disney princess is 100% The girl from brave! (I'm kicking myself for forgetting her name...) And you know this prompt is gonna be super cheesy lmao and I'm stretching it across general kid movies!
Dad!Allies and Dad!Axis catching their child dressed up as their favorite Character!
Allies-
America:
He could hear Monster's Inc. playing for about, the fourth time today
The only difference this time was he could hear his kid going "Rawr!" Every five seconds.
The man got curious and just about busted a gut from restraining his laughter.
His kid had Purple colored paper taped all over them. It was hard to tell but they were dressed up as Boo!
This gave him an idea!
Running up to this spare attic he found a purple blanket and an unused mop and some googly eyes.
Walking back to his kid he helped them get on his make shift Boo outfit, and the kid was ELATED about it. No more paper cuts for them!
The best part was when he asked them why they dressed up as Boo, they told him it was because Boo was brave, and wasn't scared of monsters, just like their dad!
Cue their kid getting America a box of tissues while he cried on the floor.
England:
He wasn't a fan of American movies, but his kid was, so what his kid wanted, was what they got.
It... It was Shrek.
At first England kind of disliked the movie, but the more he watched it with his kid, the more he liked art the interpretations of the fairy tale characters.
And this was an extremely special moment for england.
Around the fifth time watching it he saw his kid point to one of the characters and say "That's not what tinker bell looks like!"
England had immediately spit out his tea, and started questioning his kid about it.
This was how he learned that his child had the same ability to see fairytale creatures as he does!
Soon enough he had his kid running around grabbing different blankets and scarfs to try and recreate what she really looked like!
Now he has a child sized Tinkerbell running around, Tinkerbell herself chasing after them playfully.
France:
He has the whole Disney collection from start to finish, and it's terrifying.
His kid is also badly addicted. But especially to Little Mermaid.
The thing is, France has his child completely spoiled, and has a bunch of maids around the place. One of which loves nothing more than sewing together cute outfits for the kid.
It's not that France doesn't have the time, oh no, this was the kids idea, and their idea only.
One day, after a grueling work day, he's in his room, trying to rest. His kid comes in wearing a trench coat.
France is courious as to why, and his mood is immediately lifted as the small child acts out a shortened play of The Little Mermaid, all costumes included.
It was amazing how well they moved with all the clothes they were wearing, and taking them on and off again as quickly as possible.
By the end France had given them a standing ovation, and they both happily napped on his bed due to the amount of physical exhaustion.
You can 100% catch France bragging about his little star to the other countries when he gets the chance!
China:
China's rubbed off on his child with several things.
One of those things is his love for old culture and reminiscing memories.
so surprise! Mulan is 100% a movie in the house... Except his kid has become brutality obsessed with the dragon.
One day China's fancy res shirts goes missing, and he finds it on his child while they were watching Mulan.
Mimicking everything Mushu does.
China has to hold his hand over his mouth as his kid eventually trips over the long shirt and starts saying things like "This is disrespectful to dragons!" And "If this shirt has a cow, it is now dishonored!"
Eventually china, very shyly, dresses up as Mulan while his kid isn't watching.
The kid proceeds to act like they're meeting a princess at Disney, not recognizing their own father.
Russia:
Unlike him, his kid really, REALLY loves the snow.
It's something that he hopes his child grows out of because he's heard them sing 'let it go' about 50 times.
It was very cute at first. Now he wants to beat the CD with his pipe (and then America for gifting them the movie).
But then the SECOND on came out.
Now his child parades around as Elsa, hitting high sqeaky notes, and following around the cat.
Cat is having more fun then the kid to be honest.
Russia was about to try and distract his kid until they asks him to play dress up with them
The sparkle in their eyes made him immediately say yes.
They wanted him to be Christoph, and when he asked them why he just about cried.
"Your cool, funny, nice, and you have the same nose!"
That's it. That broke him, he's trying not to cry
Has never knitted a dress so fast in his life, and has a very similar outfit to Christoph as well, so the two of them are parading around the house with their cat trailing behind them. His own little knitted Olaf costume on!
Canada:
Canada's kid can be rebellious at best, but seeing them dressed up as maleficent almost made him choke.
Is his kid turning into a villain!?
Nope. Turns out they just thought she was really cool, and felt bad that she wasn't invited to the child's birthday, or whatever.
And to be honest, yeah, that's kind of cruel.
Canada had bought the Sleeping Beauty film via America's suggestion, and wasn't dissapointed.
And now it was totally worth it since his kid was going through their "I have one outfit and no matter how many times my horns won't fit through the car door, I refuse to take them off" phase.
He enjoyed watching his kid act out a happier ending dressed as the Disney villain. And even snuck a few pictures of them prancing around and singing.
It brought tears to his eyes knowing that no matter what, his kid can see the good in anyone, and maybe one day that will come in handy!
Axis-
Germany:
I need to make it immediately clear, that Germany and China now officially plan playdates for their Mulan obsessed children.
Except Germany's kid is obsessed with Li Shang, and the "let's get down to business" song.
He's so proud of his kid not being afraid to show their little clumsy moves in order to show people they mean business.
Even if he can't take them seriously when they are this small and cute.
It starts out when they wanted to be a character from Mulan on Halloween, not yet seen the movie, but all that was left was a mock up Li Shang costume.
It was game over.
The kid would sing to his German shepherds as if they were their shoulders and bark dog commands.
Germany is a proud father now.
And the playdates I mentioned earlier? Oh yeah it's twice as cute when you have a tiny red dragon going "I HAVE TINY ARMS I CAN NIT BE MAN!"
Italy:
Beauty and the beast.
Italy's kid adores Bell, and has memorized every line, and dance.
One point gave him a heart attack catching them climbing a latter.
The best part is, Italy kept his chibi outfit from when he lived under Austria's rules. Which was at some point died blue, but now he has a tiny Bell running around more than gleefully.
Italy even joins in with him, and honestly it's the cutest thing.
Surprisingly his kid is really good with singing, and this is their new favorite hobby now.
Italy is also really emotional over the fact his kid wasn't scared of Beast either. His little tike is going to be a brave one, Italy is going to make sure of it!
Japan:
Yeah, Disney movies don't exist in his house, but Studio Ghibli 1000% does.
His kid is obsessed with Ponyo!
One day Japan was really concerned over how quiet his kid was being until he found them in the koi pond, trying to talk to the fishes, and heard him name them Ponyo 1-5.
His heart dank because he wanted to tell them the fish had no clue what they were saying, but at the same time.
Kawaii overload.
Small child talking to the koi, and enjoying the water, and muddy rain puddles? Oh yeah. That's adorable.
Eventually he makes them a fish outfit and it's a good thing it was mostly foam because the first thing his kid did was splash around in the puddles.
Japan filmed it.
He's planning on embarrassing his kid when they turn 16.
It's payback for not letting him watch the movie with them earlier.
Prussia:
Oh no. His kid has become obsessed with Rapunzel.
"how is that an issue?"
Well when your kid developed some of your impulse control issues, you will find them trying to crawl out of a window to escape their unlawful step mother/Prussia.
He was extremely confused about it at first as well. Untill his kid said, something something RAPUNZEL!
Then it clicked, and he was able to laugh about it.
Prussia hasn't seen the movie himself, and when he watches it he thinks Rapunzel is so quirky and super AWESOME! Especially because his kid now has a bunch of yarn on their head.
Not gonna lie, they both dress up as Rapunzel and try and fight each other with the long wigs.
Which is a sight to see first thing in the morning. Just ask Germany.
I know I didn't answer the prompt exactly, but I couldn't resist making some wholesome content! Also-
HER NAME IS MERIDA I JUST REMEMBERED IT LIKE, 3 DAYS AFTER THE FIRST DRAFT! THE CHICK FROM BRAVE IS MERIDA!!!
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spicedhoneyy · 3 years
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one last chance
*its 1 am and my brain is dead, i tried tho lmao*
cw// alcohol,
music rang through the club at a deafening volume, bass vibrating the floors as dahyun danced against a stranger. the neon strobe lights illuminated just enough to see a person or two in front of her. her intuition slowly started to fade with every shot of alcohol, the acrid tasting liquid rolling down her throat, burning with every sip. 
it was momo’s idea to bring dahyun for a night out, her best friend insisting that she couldn’t sit at home and mope about her ex forever. despite dahyun’s pleas, momo dragged dahyun to her favorite club. granted she chose it because of the cute bartender, mina, she convinced dahyun that she’d find a girl here. 
dahyun scanned the dance floor, momo nowhere to be found, instead she found a woman, eyes locked on her. the woman’s eyes crawled up dahyun’s body as she strode over, her stilettos clicking against the floor. despite the music drowning out the noises around dahyun, the distinct click of the heels sent shivers up her spine. 
“well hello beautiful, what are you doing standing alone like this? dance with me?” the stranger reached for dahyun’s hand before she could respond. although dahyun was hesitant, there was something about the stranger that drew her in. 
the mystery woman danced against dahyun, wrapping an arm around her waist and gently pulling her closer. dahyun cautiously moved with her, their movements becoming one as the stranger lightly pushed her hips against dahyun’s. 
the woman’s blonde hair brushed dahyun’s ear as she bent down, and in a husky whisper rasped out, “im sana, and you are?” her voice was smoky and rich, far more inviting than dahyun was up for in the moment. 
sana turned dahyun around, resting a hand on the curve of her back as she placed dahyun’s hand on her ass. dahyun gradually moved her hand so her palm was resting on sana’s back instead, this woman was a stranger and dahyun didn’t exactly know her intentions. 
“i’m dahyun...” the pale skinned girl stated as she started to dance away from sana. she knew that she didn’t want what sana had to offer and she was not one to stick around in these situations. 
dahyun pointed to momo who was now against the bar, clearly flirting with that cute bartender she’d been crushing on for months. the fair skinned girl smiled softly, “i have to be somewhere. it was nice meeting you sana.” 
sana smirked, “see you around beautiful, it was fun.” she removed her hand from dahyun’s back, immediately turning to another woman nearby and introducing herself. 
momo perked up upon seeing dahyun, “i see you met sana.” 
dahyun turned back to see sana now grinding against a woman, a smile aross her face. dahyun replied, “yes...she’s very...pretty.” 
momo offered dahyun another shot just to be turned down by the younger woman. dahyun shook her head, “no, i’m going to head home now. i already texted chaeyoung to come get me.”
the taller woman sipped from a cocktail glass, “you sure? we can do something else if you’d like?” 
dahyun refused, “no, you stay here with your...friend and i’ll head home. text me when you get home okay?” 
the woman from behind the bar spoke up, “i’m her ride. don’t worry about her okay?” 
dahyun eyed the bartender, not knowing if she could trust the woman. however momo added, “yup, she’s been taking me back to the apartment for weeks. i’ll be okay dahyun-ah.” 
the younger woman nodded before heading for the door and walking down the street. dahyun stopped midway, pulling off her heels and carrying them in her hand. a sigh of relief upon taking them off, replaced with a small squeak upon feeling the ice cold cement under her toes. 
the humid night air made her dress cling to her body, slowly riding up her thighs as she walked under the balmy, yellowed, light that illuminated the streets from above. 
memories from months prior flooded dahyun’s memory. the way she used to walk over here almost every night to see her then girlfriend. the two of them going on night drives through the city, sneaking into buildings and running up to the roof to star gaze. those rainy afternoons that were spent in bed, cuddling under warm blankets and dozing in and out of sleep to the rhythmic falling of raindrops. 
tears fell down dahyun’s cheeks, her thoughts clouded with everything about her ex. nayeon was her first everything, her entire world revolved around nayeon, dahyun loved nayeon with her entire being. she thought it was the same way until the older girl told her she fell out of love. it was as if the rug was pulled from under her feet in an instant. 
dahyun didn’t know if it was the alcohol in her system that led her here, to nayeon’s apartment, or if it was her heart blocking out her judgement. either way she was here and chaeyoung was still ten minutes away. 
the fair skinned woman walked up the stairs slowly, holding onto the railing so she didn’t slip and fall, the last thing she needed was a twisted ankle on top of a broken heart. 
dahyun stopped at nayeon’s door, bringing her hand up to knock, hesitating as if she was actually considering leaving without a trace. her heart got the best of her and she knocked loud enough to wake up nayeon and her neighbors. she held herself up on the doorframe, remembering how this is where many goodnight kisses were given. 
the front door opened, nayeon standing in the doorway, her hair messy and shirt on backwards. nayeon wore no pants as her t shirt hung around her mid thigh, her cheeks flushed pink as she tried to smooth over her shirt as if it wasn’t clear what she’d been doing moments ago. 
nayeon squinted, “dahyun? we talked about this, you showing up at my doorstep. this has to stop.” 
dahyun exhaled, her breath reeked of alcohol and cheap perfume, “i-i’m sorry. i’m trying so hard nayeon. i keep going on dates and kissing strangers, only to imagine that they’re you. i-it’s not the same. i only remember you nay. i only want you, i still love you. i’m still in love with you. please just give me one more chance, i just want one last chance with you....please.” 
nayeon momentarily thought about how dahyun was the only one on her mind as well. she’d been hooking up with girls and going on blind dates for months, just to end up moaning dahyun’s name into someone else’s ear or calling them by the wrong name at the end of the date. 
she missed dahyun with all of her heart and she still loved dahyun more than anyone else in the world. however her father made a business deal and she was to be together with someone else. 
before nayeon could answer someone walked around the corner, clad in only a pair of pajama shorts with a blanket wrapped around their front. the woman asked, “nayeon who’s at the door?” 
nayeon looked into dahyun’s eyes, “nobody, they were just leaving babe.” she lowered her voice for only dahyun to hear, “i’m sorry dahyun, please don’t come back here.” 
dahyun watched as the door closed in her face, salty tears falling down her face, surely ruining what was left of her makeup. she wiped her face, turning around and walking back down the stairs. with every step she picked up speed, ending in a full sprint back down the street in hopes that chaeyoung was waiting for her. 
the front door that was once closed reopened, “dahyun wait-” nayeon called as she looked around, sprinting down the stairwell but to no resolve. dahyun was gone and this time she wasn’t going to come back. nayeon broke down, sobbing against the railing of the stairs, the cold metal against her bare thighs, she whimpered, “please....” 
as dahyun ran she could have sworn she heard nayeon call for her, but she ignored it, knowing it was probably all in her head. her eyes full of tears, her thighs burning with every step as her feet slapped against the pavement. she cursed herself, wondering why she even thought nayeon would give her one last chance. 
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lgbtqlegends · 3 years
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poly!legends headcanons
alright y'all so,,, i was doing the sara/charlie/zari ask the other day and then poly!legends (smth both me and mod choco Love yet clearly don't think abt/write enough lmao) popped into my head and wouldn't leave so,, headcanon time woo!! there's not really any Set relationships it's just,,, poly!legends, so ig they're all just basically dating each other, or at least,, within the parameters of their sexualities lol so like,,, i.e. ava being a lesbian wouldn't be dating any of the guys. do with that what you will. onto the headcanons!
they have giant sleepover movie nights every single week, non-negotiable, and they gather a bunch of pillows and blankets and beebos and throw them on the floor in the rec room. they get into comfy pjs (sometimes they have onesie nights where all of them have to wear a onesie for pjs- yes even you too mick- but most times its just,,, whatever they wanna wear for pjs). they're all in a massive cuddle pile and it's practically the only time they can all have a collective date night bc there's Too Many of them to do much else lmfao
after any really hard crossover missions they forgo the cleanup and instead just have giant cuddle puddles in the middle of wherever they are, because they're all like,,, terrified about the potential of losing each other. everyone else has to clean up around them bc they refuse to move. kara always ends up in the cuddle puddle eventually, bc she pouts and looks longingly until someone tells her to go cuddle
gideon would be such a little shit lmao she would tease all of them about Everything,,, without mercy. everything is fair game. also she has,,, no idea how like half of these relationships even work out but at the same time,,, she doesn't really need to know?? she's just happy that they all found each other and that she was able to witness all of these friendships/relationships/connections form so,,, (the legends all 100% band together to get the science nerds to figure out how to let human!gideon come out every so often bc let's be honest they're all shook by her and they definitely all think she's hot lmao. gideon doesn't know how she somehow ended up in the midst of poly!legends but she doesn't really think she'd change a thing)
they have so many smaller sleepovers too like,,, in between the giant movie night sleepovers. like they all kinda more or less have their main relationship(s) or w/e but they're all still generally dating each other so it's definitely not uncommon at all for there to be smaller sleepovers in any of the rooms on any given night, because they all like spending time together but they have to limit the giant movie nights to no more than once a week bc they can't just,,, permanently set up shop in the rec room and also there are no beds that will fit All of them but they definitely cannot just sleep on the floor with pillows and blankets every night so,,, they make do lmao
all the other superteams are lowkey scared of/intimidated by the legends (and also probably just,,, a little bit scarred for life lmao) bc they've portaled onto the waverider w/o calling ahead before and they've,,, seen and heard some shit,,, and although the other superteams don't necessarily understand like,,, how,,, the legends exist and operate like they do they also like,,, respect them for it too bc like,,, they're all dating each other and they're all also Living together and they,,, have not killed each other yet (at least not Intentionally,,, and i mean,,, they get on each other's nerves and prob Threaten death but that's just How They Are,,, esp with, for the most part, emotionally constipated pyromaniac/thief and former assassin and just,,, everyone else,,, it's just How the legends Are lmao)
also there are,,, so many different levels of affection with them lmao cause like,,, you've got a few who are very openly physically affectionate with everyone (also dependent upon the other person's comfort level w/ affection though), like say ray and nate and mona, and then there's like,,, sara, who's love language Is physical touch but she's much more guarded about it and reserved with it and then there's like,,, mick who is like,,, absolutely Not with physical affection unless it's with snart or like,,, mona (and like,, lita too obvi but that's obvi parental and not some type of poly relationship lmao). but he shows his affection for everyone else in other ways lmao so,,, outside people probably find it very amusing and confusing to watch
speaking of lita, her visits to the waverider are super fun lmao it's always a surprise, she never knows quite what's gonna happen lmao. it's always an adventure n she's got so many aunts and uncles now
also?? there are,,,, So Many "meet the parents" and each time is just,,, utter chaos and confusion. quentin (and dinah) were def the most chill with it, after all they've seen (esp quentin) they're both just like "yeah alright this is just a normal tuesday". everyone else's parents' reactions range from "a little confused but supportive" to "it didn't go very well" and uh,,, anyway quentin and dinah are like,,, "fuck it we have So Many kids now" lmao
sometimes they all try to go on like,,, big proper collective dates that aren't just,,,, movie nights on the waverider, but it almost always ends in disaster lmao. they've tried lasertag and paintball, they've tried escape rooms, they've tried amusement parks,,, it just Always ends in absolute chaos and disaster
anyways that's all I've got for this headcanon post, if mod choco or I think of more at some point, we'll probably post them lmao but for now have these, and feel free to come to our inbox and send us asks abt poly!legends
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marcholasmoth · 2 years
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OSRR: 2654
great news! yesterday was just my body being Dramatic™ because it needed a break. but i generally refused to give it, so it said "well fine, but don't come crawling to me when you do need a break."
lmao ok
anyway
i woke up today with no nose problems. no stuffy head. no allergies pestering me. clear nostrils. clear head.
but i also woke up at 6am.
for no discernible reason.
i tried sleeping again, which worked for about forty minutes, and then i said "yknow what? fuck it." and i just got up. i showered (it was lovely) and cooled down enough (wild, right??) and got dressed while cleaning up some things in my room (what???) and i went downstairs around 7:25. around 7:35 or so i left. i made it to bedford around 8. there was no line at starbucks. i made it to the school - with starbucks - by 8:20am. what. the fuck.
i walked in and aileen intercepted me and told me, "there's a veterans breakfast outside the MPR, everyone's invited." so i went and got breakfast. eggs and potatoes and fruit, all well cooked and really good and i was a happy clam. a moderately tired but happy clam.
i went back to the library for 9. no appointment at 9. 10am appointment (chemistry) didn't show. 11am appointment (microbiology) was online. 12pm appointment (spanish) was late but still came. 1pm was my break, so i laid on the floor to stretch out my spine. 1:30pm a student came over for help with calc. the first math i'd done. i'm the math tutor. lmao.
anyway, 2pm appointment (older lady in for early childhood education) showed up at 2:40, so i told her to come back at 4. 3pm appointment (earth science) was there on time and we went a little long, but that was fine. then for two and a half hours, i worked with the older lady on her early childhood ed class materials.
i left around 6:30pm. i got home just after 7, and immediately sat down to tutor some more. (statistics!! MATH!!!! fuckin incredible.) we went until about 8 when she had to go check around for her son, as he wasn't where he was supposed to be and she was worried.
by that point, i'd been working with students and handling other peoples' shit for twelve hours. i was brain dead.
so i did what any normal brain dead person does:
sit and stare at the computer screen until it does something.
in my case, i stared at my homework until i decided i had a headache and i needed to go the fuck to sleep instead. i was also stressing about cleaning my room. but i knew that the homework was the priority, because i can always clean my room tomorrow after class; homework is due by 10am. so i had to get it done first.
but i sat and watched tv, completely tuned out. i was hungry, but was sick of the sugar. i grabbed a big cup of water and gulped it down. put it down. didn't pick it up again.
did nothing, curled up in my chair and waited for myself to give in and go the fuck to sleep.
did i do that?
no.
i stayed up, decided around 10 that i needed food, so i made mac n cheese which, despite not being the normal stuff, was quite delicious. so i had mac n cheese and i went back to my physics work. i kind of logic-ed through the second problem and then got stuck on the third one for so long because i did the right thing and i did it over and over and i wasn't getting the right answer. fuck. so i looked it up, and i found a step-by-step process, which made sense, honestly. but it didn't give units, so when my answer was ultimately wrong, i didn't fucking know what to do. i got the same answers that i did the first time. i was just missing a step: i had to convert the sun's luminosity from units of Ldot to Watts, which isn't something that anyone said anything about anywhere. so i'm glad i figured it out. i ended up getting it right after that. because i'm a smart cookie. hell yeah. and then i did the fourth one, which was stupid too. i don't even remember what it was. oh. i remember. i think i may have gotten it wrong. but it was fucking. 1:30am. and i wasn't about to do another problem again because i was just too damn tired.
at some point i talked to joel, he encouraged me to eat and to go get some sleep, which i did, and will do shortly. he's got an interview tomorrow, and i'm so excited for him!!
but also i miss him. i would like joel hugs.
and i realized this morning as i was being a couch potato at work why my knee has been killing me so fucking much.
it's sensitive to the weather.
but not because of the surgeries i've had.
because i broke it in february this year.
i'm a goddamn fool. christ on a cracker.
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