#my head is reeling at 7:30 am

[haechwrites]

sugar, butter, & the royal crown - L.DH

prince!lee donghyuck x baker fem!OC (no name!)

synopsis: prince donghyuck only has one princess on his mind, but she's not actually a princess. she's just the royal baker's granddaughter.

wc: ~17.1k

warnings: pet names used only so i don't have to namedrop lol. no other warnings tho!

A/N: this is my second longest fic i've actually finished hehe i'm really happy with this one and now i wish i had a prince haechan lol

-- some things to note first:

THIS FIC IS WRITTEN IN FIRST PERSON. if you see ♔, that means it's in haechan's pov written in third person!

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As a child, life is all about the simple pleasures. It didn’t matter that I’d come home to a dark house carrying the faint snores of my mother. I was still reeling from the sweet taste of mangoes on my tongue, the slight dusting of sugar in my hair, and the lingering soreness from laughing in my cheeks. I’d quickly wash up, give my mom a quick peck on the forehead, and tuck myself in bed. Before I know it, the sun greets me again and I meet my grandma outside as she leads me to the palace. This was my routine and for my young brain, there was nothing ever wrong with it.

My grandma is the head baker at the palace. Since the separation of my parents, I have spent my days with my grandma at work. It was all I knew and I was content with it. Every sunrise, I’d have 30 minutes before I had to meet her outside. Together, we’d walk to the palace’s servant entrance and my grandma would give our favorite guard, Doyun, a warm smile and a promise to slip an extra pastry in his meal for letting me tag along. I’d walk past him with a finger to my lips asking him to be sworn to secrecy. He’d always return it with a wink and a small laugh. It was our little promise, though I’m sure no one would actually mind an extra guest on the grounds – especially a mere 7-year-old. 

Once inside the kitchen, I strap on the apron that the palace’s tailor secretly made specifically for me. Grandma told me that the busiest times in the kitchen were the mornings, so I always sit in the corner to let her start the day. I occupy myself for at least an hour before my friend comes to play with me. His entrance is always the same: a secret knock on the side door and a gleaming smile when I open it for him. 

Today he’s dressed up in a super fancy garment, almost like a uniform. I had never seen him in anything other than his casual button-up and pants, typically covered by an extra adult-sized apron we’d find laying around.

“Donghyuck! What are you wearing?”

“Princess!,” He’d squeal, pulling me into a tight hug. “It’s my special outfit.”

“Is it your birthday?” My nose scrunches in confusion, looking him up and down. Even if it was his birthday, I can’t imagine his servant parents could afford such expensive fabric. 

Donghyuck laughs before yanking a spare apron off its hook and pulling it over his head. 

“Nooo. I have something important to do today. That’s why I’m wearing this,” He explains, looking a little nervous.

“Oh wow. You look like the King. Or like a prince,” I say jokingly, but Donghyuck freezes. His eyes are wide like the time he accidentally ate the last mango tart I was saving.

Then he breaks out into an awkward laugh and smiles wide at me, “I am a prince… because you’re my princess.” He says with utmost confidence, before grabbing my hands. We’re standing the way I position my two play dolls during a pretend wedding ceremony.

I quickly turn the shade of freshly baked cherry pies and I tear my hands out of his hold.

“Donghyuck-ah! How many times do I have to tell you to stop calling me that?” I huff, crossing my arms. 

He snickers, “Hmmm… maybe one hundred more times.”

“One hundred more times?!”

“Yes, if you can even count that high,” he smirks, instantly easing the tension from earlier. He plops down onto my stool and looks up at me. “So what are we playing today? Or should we read? Or does Baker Grandma need help?”

I aimlessly kick the leg of the stool, thinking about what we could do today as I can see him anxiously bounce around in his seat. He looks like he’s running on limited time today. Sometimes Donghyuck disappears on me in the middle of our hangouts or doesn’t show up at all. I just assume his parents need help with their tasks just like how Grandma often calls me to help her bake. He’s never told me where in the palace they work despite the years we’ve been hanging out. 

“What if we help your parents today?” The minute the question leaves my lips, I hear a snort from the kitchen staff and Donghyuck goes into a coughing fit as if the flour seeped into his lungs.

I begin to feel myself turn red again and wondering what was so wrong till I feel a familiar warm hand on my shoulder.

“Ah Donghyuck, you’re here today?” My grandma looks at his attire with a suspicious gaze. “Don’t you have somewhere else to be?” Her hands are on her hips and it feels similar to the times she’s caught me using the oven on my own.

Donghyuck starts shyly giggling while fiddling with the oversized apron my grandma is reaching to remove. I stand there in confusion as he looks like a puppy that was told he wasn’t allowed to play or have a treat. I want to help him but the look on grandma’s face is too scary to fight.

She’s slowly ushering him out the door and I’m holding his apron in my hands, watching him pout.

“Bye Hyuck,” I mutter, sad that our day was cut short before it even began. This was the quickest that one has ended.

“Byeee Princess,” He says with as much despair in his voice. He always has to be a little more dramatic than me. I giggle and wave him goodbye, spirits lifted by his antics. I see a smile grow on his face at the sound of my laugh before my grandma closes the door.

My loneliness returns as I stare at the wooden panels of the side door. 

“Did he have to go?” I ask, slumping back onto the stool he was just on.

My grandma turns to me with a quizzical look. I can’t tell if she’s angry, sad, or disappointed and then she’s crouched down in front of me. Her flour-coated hands are resting on my lap.

“Donghyuck got called by his parents. They’re very important people,” She starts slowly. Grandma has never talked about Donghyuck’s family or personal life before. It was never brought up in the past because I assumed he was just like me. Now that we’re finally beginning to talk about it, the hesitant look on her face makes me not want to know anymore. 

“Guards?,” I ask. To me, Doyun is the most important worker in the castle as he freely lets me in and out. Maybe guards earn enough to adorn such fancy clothes I saw Donghyuck wear.

“No, honey,” She glances back at her staff, and I notice they’ve been watching. They give me a reassuring smile, but there’s uneasiness quivering on their lips.

“Donghyuck… Donghyuck is the Prince.”

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♔

They found him. Donghyuck’s personal guards find him where they usually do when he escapes his tasks, and that would be at the palace kitchen. This time, they find him outside the door, rather than inside scarfing down mango tarts. 

Without any hesitation and with no room for him to trick them and run, they grab the tiny prince and bring him to the meeting he was meant to attend with the King. It was meant to be the first glimpse of his life as a future ruler, attending meetings with fellow diplomats and other boring princely things. Donghyuck does not understand why he can’t spend his day playing like a regular 7-year-old with his pretty friend from the kitchen. 

Despite having complained and whined his way out of most duties, Donghyuck had reached the level of maturity to know that this one he couldn’t fight. I mean, the tailor adjusted his royal attire just for this one-hour meeting. After having come to terms with sitting in boredom for an hour, Donghyuck did not expect to be dragged into more as he was about to skip his way over to the kitchen once the diplomats left.

“And where are you off to now, Donghyuck?”

He freezes in his tracks and a shiver ripples down his spine at the sound of her voice. He’s been caught again.

He spins around, plastering the biggest smile possible on his face. “Nowhere, Mother. Just strolling around until my tutoring session.” He hopes she doesn’t recognize this path to the kitchen.

“And is your tutoring session located in the kitchen today?” She asks, words dripping with a patronizing attitude. Nothing Donghyuck isn’t used to.

“Oh! I wanted to see if I could get a quick snack before. My brain needs food, right?” He hides his crossed fingers behind his back, praying she doesn’t call his bluff.

“And you’re not just going there to see that girl, are you?” She takes a step closer and Donghyuck is scared she can see the drip of sweat beginning to trickle down his forehead. How did she know about Princess? He wonders if his guard ratted him out… even after Donghyuck gave him half of his tart. The betrayal, he scoffs. 

“There’s no girl, Mother.” Donghyuck decides it's best to deny it and stare straight at his feet. 

“You are correct, there will never be a girl. Instead, there will be a future queen. A princess for now and you need to begin meeting our potential suitresses,” The queen firmly states, grabbing his shoulders to steer him towards the library. Before he could stop himself, his chest bubbles with heat, and his brain is fogged with confusion. He can’t imagine anyone by his side but her.

“Why can’t she be my princess?”

The words spill out from his royal lips before he could catch them. There’s no missing the instant look of rage and disgust on the Queen’s face when her son’s true desires are revealed. Desires of the heart, but a complete disgrace to his duties as the Prince. Her eyes grow colder and her skin pales till her blush is the brightest hue on her cheeks. 

Donghyuck feels his throat go dry and the crossed fingers behind his back unlock. No luck can help him now.

“No more kitchen visits, Prince Donghyuck.”

The queen’s words are final. His shoulders slump lower and his feet are heavy as he drags them across the cobblestone trailing toward the library. It feels like there was a wall that slammed into the ground behind him, forbidding him from seeing her again.

“Yes, ma’am. No more.”

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^ FIFTEEN YEARS LATER ^

The only memory of my childhood that lingered was the heat of the oven. Like I did every day at the age of 7, I continued to bake to keep that fire alive. There were days where the warmth was cooler than normal and my urge to bake waivered. Days like when my grandma stopped showing up outside my house every day a half hour after sunrise. Days like when my mother decided I was too much to raise when I stopped spending my time at the palace. And days like the one when I moved out of the city to live with my dad. 

However, there were also days where the flame was ablaze. Days like when I got my own personal baking set. Days like when I got accepted into a baking school. And days like today, where I return to the city that pushed me out fifteen years ago to open a bakery. Despite the dismal circumstances of the day I left, I always felt the urge to return. It never felt right that I moved in the first place. Confusion still envelops my mind when I think about how my grandma stopped taking me to the palace for unsaid reasons and how my mother was incapable of taking care of me due to it. There had to be something more going on. 

Outside of this mystery of my childhood, my main goal was to return with my own bakery specializing in my soon-to-be infamous mango tarts. I had visited the city for the first time since my move before to scope out bakery locations. But today was the day that I officially move in, to both my home and bakery, and kickstart my business. My first task was to put up a sign displaying the bakery’s name.

“Oh my goodness… so it is true!”

Warmth blooms in my chest; I would recognize that voice anywhere. I flip around and I’m greeted with her same sugary sweet smile. My grandma looks just as she did before but her hair is dusted white like the flour she worked with. But she still smelled like spiced apple pie, my eyes watered in disbelief. 

“Grandma!” I ran into her open arms and I could feel her chuckle. 

“Oh honey, it’s been much too long. Look at you now… a beautiful woman before my eyes,” She’s smiling widely and I can see her eyes take in my features. Fifteen years worth of change and growth. 

“I’m sorry we haven’t been in contact much. I could barely find the time to tell you I was coming back.”

“It’s alright. All that matters is you’re here,” Grandma rubs my arms reassuringly. “And are you here alone? Or have you moved back with a lover?” The childish gleam on her face makes me giggle and I quickly correct her that I’m single and focusing on my baking.

“Ah, I see. In that case, you must have more time than I anticipated. You must come with me to work one of these days. Just like old times. Consider it research for your bakery.” The way she sways with excitement makes it hard for me to turn it down, and I can’t deny the flutter in my heart at the idea of stepping foot onto the palace grounds again. It was where it all started for me. I agreed with a smile.

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After a week of prepping the bakery, I decided to visit my grandma. To be completely honest, outside of the work I had to do, my nerves did play a role in keeping me from going earlier. But now that I’ve decided I’ve run out of excuses, I’m walking to the servant entrance of the palace a little before noon to give my grandmother the morning to solely focus on work. It makes me smile knowing I still remember the schedule of the palace kitchen. 

The streets surrounding the castle are quiet at this hour. I can still remember the hustle and commotion of the staff in the early morning, lining up to get inside to start their days. It was never daunting to be a young girl surrounded by a diverse array of people. It was thrilling and almost comforting and it was much better than staying home alone. 

When I reach the gates, I feel like I’ve traveled back in time because blocking my path is a young guard who looks eerily like Doyun, the guard I knew from before.

“How can I help you, miss?”

“Hi.” I’m inspecting his face. He has the same colored hair, but it’s parted differently. He has the same warm light brown eyes and his face is a little softer than Doyun’s. My mind can’t help but ask, “I’m sorry if this is a strange question but do you know Guard Doyun?”

His stiff demeanor drops like a curtain and the young guard’s eyes light up, “I’m his son, Yunseo! How do you know my father?” Suddenly I don’t see a guard in uniform, but instead a bright, inviting individual in his place.

“No wonder! I’m the granddaughter of the head baker. I used to greet your father every morning when I was a child.” 

“Oh yes! Yes, she told me you were coming. You can go right along in, just make sure she knows to sneak me an extra sweet treat.” He opens the gates for me.

“Ah like father, like son,” I giggle, slightly bowing to him as I enter.

“Do you remember how to get to the kitchen?”

I stare at the familiar worn cobblestone paths and nod, “I think so.”

The walk to the kitchen is shorter than I remember but the smell wafting from the windows is all the same. I reach the side door and I’m about to knock when I notice it’s creaked slightly open. I hear a voice above all the kitchen noise.

“Gran, please sneak something in my food today so I can get sick and stay in bed for the whole week. I do not want to court these women.” I peek my head in further to take a look at the man speaking. I let out a soft gasp when my eyes land on him.

Outside of his stunning beauty, he looks familiar. His tufts of chestnut brown hair are slightly waved as they curl around the nape of his neck. He often shakes his head to get the bangs out of his face, exposing his tan skin. If I look close enough, he has distinguishable moles on the plush curves of his cheeks. His rosy lips are wrapped around a piece of pastry and even when he’s talking with his mouth full, he’s still attractive. My eyes instantly widen when I notice his outfit: the royal attire.

A squeal escapes my mouth and before I could hide, the door is swung open by my grandma.

“You’re here!”

At the announcement of my arrival, the young man is dusting the crumbs off his hands, and looks like he’s about to make a quick escape. 

“Hi Grandma,” I give her a hug, not minding the flour sticking to my sweater. “I was just about to knock.” I let out a small laugh to hide the fact that I was definitely eavesdropping not moments ago.

“Grandma?” I hear the man say behind her. He decided to stay after realizing it wasn’t one of his guards coming to get him, but instead a pretty woman. An oddly, familiar, pretty woman. 

My grandma bites her lip to keep from smiling any bigger and she grabs my arm to present me to the man.

“Oh my. I forgot you guys know each other! It’s Donghyuck, do you remember, honey? You used to play with him every day as I worked.” The glint in her eyes is something more than just happy nostalgia and I give her a look.

“Pri-... Princess?” When the old nickname leaves his lips, I gasp and feel my cheeks bloom pink. The layers of the handsome man in front of me started to peel and I could see the little boy I spent my early life with. Most of my warmest days were spent with him. But I’m also brought back to one of the colder days of my childhood. The day I found out my childhood best friend was the Prince. 

At first, I didn’t understand why my grandma was so fearful of telling me who he really was. I was ecstatic to hear that Donghyuck was royalty. I was fascinated and curious to see what his life was like and how it compared to being the granddaughter of a palace worker. I soon learned that what I wanted to discover was not so glamorous. Because apparently, his life excluded me. I didn’t piece that together until a few years after my move. Why else did Donghyuck stop showing up and why else was I forbade from going to the palace with my grandma? When I came to the realization, I began to resent him and eventually, completely forgot about him.

“Prince Donghyuck,” I bowed, trying not to show any expression. He had his arm slightly raised like he was about to reach for me but his body stiffened at my curtness. My grandma even looks at me with confusion. “It’s… It’s nice to see you again.”

“Oh, there’s no need to be so polite. You guys were friends!” My grandma squeezes my arms, urging me to get closer. I stay in my place.

“He’s the Prince, Grandma,” I whisper through my teeth and I can tell he hears me by the dejected look on his face. I can’t get myself to look him in the eyes.

“It’s quite alright. I actually have to get going. Prin-... Sorry, It was lovely to see you,” The Prince ducks his head and leaves the way I came in. He looks back at my figure once more, thoughts churning, before he disappears.

My feet remain still and I’m staring at the place he stood. Staring at the pastry he bit into. He’s real and he’s back. And the door he walked through was the same one he used to leave me 15 years ago. The alarms rang in my brain and I quickly shook my head, grabbing a bowl and mixing whatever contents are in it. The faster I stirred, the more I begged my mind to stop thinking about Donghyuck.

“You’re overwhipping the cream.”

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♔

On every page he turned to, the words blurred and all Donghyuck could see was her. She was more beautiful than he remembered. She’s much taller now, and he naturally smiles remembering when she used to argue that he was only taller than her by a centimeter. Her hair was also longer and not bound in her classic two braids. Though he didn’t get to see her smile, he was sure that it’s brighter than before. After all, everything about her seemed to have grown more beautiful than before. Donghyuck wonders if he should be calling her “Queen” now with how wonderfully she’s aged. 

A delicate tap on his shoulder forces Donghyuck out of his lovestruck haze. “Prince Donghyuck, are you enjoying your book?”

He remembers that he’s in the library with one of his potential suitresses. He turns to her and almost wants to laugh. For the years that his childhood friend has been gone, it was the memory of her that invaded his mind whenever he was forced to go on these dates. But now that Donghyuck has seen her again in the flesh, he realizes how doomed he is and how these other princesses definitely don’t stand a chance.

During the fifteen years apart, Donghyuck’s gloom exacerbated the Queen’s determination to find him a future queen. Out of all his regular royal responsibilities, his courtships took the most time. He excels in all areas of his duties, but the one he can’t manage to succeed in is getting a wife. From playdates to formal dates, Donghyuck aged and remained single. And both he and the head baker knew why. 

Despite the Queen’s warnings to never enter the kitchen, Donghyuck found himself there every week whether it was to steal extra mango tarts or ask about the baker’s granddaughter. It was usually after failed dates when he’d trudge into the kitchen, completely drained of energy, and beg the baker to talk to him about his first love. Questions about where she is, how she’s doing, and whether she thinks of him spill from his mouth, and the baker would entertain him every time. Even if he only knew and could only remember the child version of her, Donghyuck still managed to compare her to every suitress he met. None of them stood a chance against his princess. And though with time he could recognize how silly this infatuation had gotten, he grew fatigued of courtship and this was the easiest way to go about it. The grandmother was wary of this long overrun connection as well, but at the same time commended him for his commitment to her granddaughter. She also didn’t have the heart to tell him to move on.

And now Donghyuck’s here, on another date and he actually has an image, a real person, to be thinking of. 

“I’m sorry. I don’t think this is going to work out.”

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“So you are hiding from me?”

“Oh Jesus Christ,” I drop the bowl of frosting at my feet and scramble to pick it up. A pair of far too expensive shoes enter my vision. I shoot up and my heart races, knowing exactly who it is.

“My prince,” I bow, meeting the ground once more. I stand upright and give him a passing smile.

“I like hearing you say that,” The Prince smirks. He swiftly scoops a finger of frosting before popping it in his mouth.

“Formalities,” I respond and I move the bowl out of his reach.

He chuckles and he starts to fiddle with an apron left on the counter.

“So you’ve been visiting at nighttime. Are you actually avoiding me?” He looks at me like he’s challenging me to say no. 

Yes. “No, I just prefer the kitchen at night.” I clutch the frosting bowl tighter and focus my attention on what’s salvageable.

“You mean my kitchen… which you’ve been sneaking into with the help of my guard.” I can feel that he’s moved closer and I wince.

“Yes… I’m sorry. My grandma said it’d be okay and my kitchen at the bakery isn’t finished being built. If you’d like me to stop coming, I can.” I start to untie my apron and his hand catches my wrist.

“No,” He blurts out. “There’s no need. Feel free to use the kitchen.” The Prince raises his hands in the air as if to give me permission. I politely nod and go back to fixing my frosting, ignoring the tingling I feel on my wrist. 

He doesn’t make a move to leave. Instead, he puts on the apron from the counter and leans in to watch.

“Um, what are you doing?” The Prince is tapping the table and humming as he stares at me.

“Hanging out,” He says matter-of-factly. 

“I see,” And that’s all that I can say because who am I to kick the Prince out of his own kitchen? So I just mix and continue doing my thing.

“Just like the old days. You do remember, right?” I make the mistake of looking up and meeting his eyes. He’s looking at me like his question meant more than just a test of my memory.

“Vaguely… It was a long, long time ago.” A time I don’t wish to relive.

There’s a short pause before The Prince replies.

“Well, I remember. I think I’ll always remember. You were my best friend… And those were probably the best days of my life.” He doesn’t look at me when he says this. In fact, he looks nervous to be admitting it in the first place. 

All I can do is nod, not knowing what to say to his confession. Especially when the feeling I get when I look back on those times is not as positive.

“Anyway… I’m planning on recreating those times.” Without thinking, I meet his eyes and he’s smiling hopefully. “So don’t try to hide from me next time. I’ll be here whenever you are. Think of it as your payment for using the kitchen.” 

The uneasiness and warmth in my stomach are hard to decipher. The thought of spending more time with him is thrilling and terrifying at the same time. I try to ease my nerves by mixing even harder and he notices before laughing. 

With my unspoken agreement, we spend the rest of the night in silence, just in each other’s presence. Every now and then he steals a bite of my makings and tries to lighten the air with a poorly made joke. And I don’t hold my laughter back.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

“And then, once the frosting is on, you can add the strawberries.” I demonstrate by putting the nicely sliced strawberries on in a thin layer. 

“When are you going to teach me how to make the mango tart?” The Prince pouts and bites the strawberries instead of putting them on the cake. I scowl and move the bowl away from him. 

“When are you going to stop eating my ingredients?”

He smirks and taps the counter, “When are you going to stop using my kitchen?” He tilts his head to the side to goad me.

I roll my lips into my mouth and stuff another strawberry in his face when he laughs. 

“Eat up,” I say sickeningly sweet.

Completely out of my control, my hangouts with Prince Donghyuck have returned. However, this time, I know he’s the prince and instead of every day in the morning, it’s 2 to 3 times a week at night. My excuse is that my kitchen in the bakery isn’t done being built, but to be completely honest, I could have it done by the end of the week. Maybe it’s because I enjoy my time with the Prince or maybe it’s because I actually do want the extra amenities I asked to be installed last minute… who knows? The end conclusion is that I find myself in the palace’s kitchen more often than I intended, and I find myself enjoying the Prince’s company more than I intended.

“Okay, your highness. Do you think you can stack these layers evenly?” 

He gives me a playful salute, mouth full of cream, as he hops off the kitchen counter. He stands by my side and takes the cake from my hands.

“You know… as much as I like hearing you call me ‘your highness,’ why don’t you ever call me by my name anymore?” 

“Because now I know you’re the Prince.” And I don’t know how it feels to have your name roll off my tongue as it did before, I think to myself.

The Prince lets out a low whistle. “Do you see me differently?” He trains his eyes to the level of the cake to get it precisely right. I watch him from above.

“It’s been fifteen years… so yes, I do see you differently.” I move to mix more frosting to coat the cake with.

“Okay,” He nods, thinking about my response. “So me being the Prince isn’t part of it?” He glances at me quickly with what I can assume is worry before he goes to add another layer of cake.

“Mmm… It is. Not a big part, but definitely a part. I think it’s mainly because you’ve grown up, We’ve both grown up. Maybe me more than you,” I tease. He sticks his tongue out at me and I make a face back. “Example number one.”

He finishes putting on the last layer and stands up straight to admire his work.

“What makes me different than before?” He takes the frosting bowl from my hands and begins icing the cake like I’ve taught him a couple of days ago. I take this as a break and I lift myself up to sit on the counter, dangling my feet.

“You’re taller than me, for one,” he gasps in fake shock and I hit him on the shoulder. 

“You’re dressed nicer.”

“That’s not a compliment for me, that’s a compliment for my stylist,” He corrects me.

“True, okay. You’re smarter than before, I can see you’re not skipping your tutoring sessions. And… you’re not as cute.”

At that, he perks up, frosting is long forgotten. “What do you mean I’m not as cute?” And with the face he’s making, I almost take back my words.

“Well, your highness, you were a boy before. Of course, you’re not cute now. You’re a man.” I roll my eyes as if that were the most obvious thing.

“If I’m not cute, then what am I?” He squints at me and I can tell I’ve fallen into a trap.

“You’re… You’re handsome. Now,” I mutter out. I quickly clear my throat and point to a bald spot on the cake. “Hey, you missed a spot.”

Without even looking at him, I know he’s smiling. “You think I’m handsome.”

“Alright,” I drag out the word. “You’re the Prince. Aren’t you supposed to be handsome so you can woo and marry a pretty princess?”

“Not exactly. Being ridiculously handsome isn’t a royal requirement.”

I let out a scoff, “When did I say ‘ridiculously handsome’?”

“You didn’t have to, I see it on your face.” He taps my cheek and I suddenly notice how close our faces have gotten. Before I know it, my face is blooming pink again and I can feel the warmth shoot from my head to the rest of my body. I launch myself back and adjust my apron. And he stares at me like he’s won.

“Okay, your turn. What’s different about me?” I look around the kitchen to get my heart to settle down. What is happening?

The Prince doesn’t hesitate. “Well, you’re just as beautiful as you were before. Maybe even more.”

I gasp at his words and look him in the eyes. There’s no hint of his typical teasing attitude; he looks completely genuine. My mind goes blank and my ability to respond is rendered useless. He seems to notice that so he brushes off his comment quickly, thinking he’s overstepped.

“Anyways, since we’ve discovered that the only thing that makes me different from before is that I’m exceptionally more handsome-”

“Didn’t say that.”

“-Then why don’t you just call me ‘Donghyuck.’ Like you did before.”

Maybe it’s because he called me beautiful. Maybe it’s because I like the idea of exclusively calling him ‘Donghyuck.’ Or maybe I’m excited to eat the cake we just made, but my heart is fluttering quicker than it ever has.

“Okay. Donghyuck.”

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

“FIRE! DONGHYUCK! FIRE, FIRE!”

“OH SHIT!”

Watching the medium sized fire bursting from the top of the pot, I run to the fire extinguisher. I’m scrambling to grab it, swift to squeeze the white dust all over the burning stove, despite the dough covering my hands. I hear Donghyuck’s screams in the back and he’s grabbing my shoulders to hide. Once I see the last flame get coated, I drop the extinguisher on the ground, exhausted.

I feel his hands digging into my shoulder blades and I grab him by the jacket, turning him to face me. Knowing how to cover his ass, he smiles in shame, rubbing my arm.

“I swear I was watching the stove,” He whips out his baby voice and try my best not to smack the side of his head. He’s the Prince. He’s the Prince. He’s the Prince, I repeat to myself. 

“Your looks distracted me.” I slap him anyways.

He groans in pain, even though I could’ve slapped harder and I cross my arms to look as threatening as possible. 

“You burnt the caramel,” I whine, staring at the black tar in my brand new pot. “And my pot!”

He immediately attacks me with a hug, shaking me around, mumbling apologies. “I’ll buy you a new one, I promise! I’ll buy you three! Four? Seven!”

“Make it eight,” I huff, tearing his arms off me, only to weirdly miss them.

He gasps, hands against his head in shock. “You definitely dressed prettier today just so I could set your pot on fire and buy you twenty more… You’re evil,” He looks at me like I’ve masterminded the biggest robbery of the century. 

I narrow my eyes at him, lifting my hand to smack him again. “And you’re on timeout. No more baking today.” I start putting away the dishes I had ready.

“Hey! Who’s older here?” Donghyuck begins helping me sort the supplies into the pantry.

“I’m pretty sure I am,” I say, trying to remember if we told each other our birthdays back then.

“When were you born?”

“May.”

“Shit,” He mutters. He tosses the burnt pot into the trashcan, wincing at the char. “Okay, let’s keep the ball rolling. What’s your favorite color?”

I laugh, “Really? Also should I save this dough for tomorrow when we try again?” I hold it up to show him and inspects it.

“Yeah, why not? Just wear a trashbag or something tomorrow.” I kick him in the foot and he chuckles. “But yes, really. What’s your favorite color? I like red.”

“Purple,” I play along while saran wrapping the dough. “Favorite food?”

“Kimchi jjigae,” he spits out, with no hesitation. I nod along, remembering all the times he’s requested it as a midnight snack while we bake. “What do you like to do besides baking?”

“I like to go on walks. When I moved out of the city and with my dad, we lived near the beach. It was nice to just walk on the shore only five minutes away from me. I miss it sometimes. I should probably visit soon.” I tap the bowl mindlessly, trying to figure out my schedule.

“You should take me,” Donghyuck says. He’s right next to me now. “I always wondered where you went after I stopped seeing you. I assumed you were still in the city, until your grandma told me you moved-moved.”

“Ohh, no, yeah. I moved. It was hard leaving everything I knew, but at the same time, I learned so much when I was there with my dad. Come with me next time, and we can hangout on the beach. Nothing should be too flammable there.” I tease, bumping his hip with mine. He laughs with me, but I can tell his mind is somewhere else. His eyebrows are furrowed, and he looks almost guilty.

“You know, when I found out you were the Prince, I wrote down a list of questions. I was so excited to see what your life is like.” 

This grabbed his attention and my heart eased seeing his eyes light up a little more. The kitchen was relatively clean now, so I decided to prop myself up on the counter. Donghyuck always gets mad at the sudden height difference, but I can tell he loves it when he naturally wedges himself between my thighs like he does right now.

“Yeah? Do you remember any?” His hands were pinned on either side of my hips, forearms pressed against my outer thighs. It’s comfortable. I’m not sure when we got so comfortable. “This is kind of like ‘Princess and The Pauper.’”

I snort trying to remember my list. “I think I wanted to know how many crowns you had.”

“Classic question. I’m pretty sure I have three. My head’s kinda small, so it actually takes awhile for them to make it.”

I hum, investigating his head. “I can tell.”

“Mean.” He lightly pinches my thigh and I stop staring at his skull.

“I also wanted to know if you had any royal pets.”

“A cute, small, white dog. Yep.” He nods, like he’s impressed with himself for having such a basic dog and I have to laugh. 

“Any cool cars?”

“Tons,” He brags. “Okay, what does ‘Adult You’ want to know?”

There’s always been a question I wanted to ask him since I started hanging out with him again. It nagged in the back of my mind as I watched him, always happy, always cheering everyone on. Despite his bright facial expressions and body language, I could tell it was tiring, it must be. I never imagined the royal life to be hard, or as hard as my own, until I met him again.

I look at his face, checking for any signs that I shouldn’t be asking him. But he looks at me with such softness and openness, that I don’t hesitate to ask.

“Are you happy? Like… do you like being the Prince?”

His eyes widened at my question and he looks down at my lap to think. He takes longer than I expect, and I assume no one has ever bothered to ask. His silence is telling.

“Hey…,” I reach for his face to lift his chin up. “It’s okay to say you’re not. You don’t have to be all the time.”

He flinches like this was a concept he couldn’t accept for himself. I grab his face a little tighter so he really hears me.

“As long as you’re at least looking for your happiness, that’s all that matters,” I stroke his cheek with my thumb. “You deserve all the happiness, Hyuck.”

I can see his mind slowly wrapping around my words as something in his face shifts. He looks hesitant for a different reason.

“And what if I find my happiness in you?” I gasp, instinctively letting go of his face slightly. He’s fast to bring his hand up to keep mine there. His fingers slot between my gaps. He looks desperate to keep me here.

Knowing my words hold immense weight, I still don’t stop myself from saying, “Then I’ll be that for you, in whatever way I can.”

Despite me being vague, Donghyuck takes all that he can. His face blooms into a smile and I return it, knowing it was cause of me. He holds my hand this time and brings it down to my lap, sighing happily.

“Thank you.”

And for a split second, I’m scared for what I’ve promised. After all, he’s the prince and I’m the pauper.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

♔

Donghyuck is the happiest he has ever been. Unlike how it was when he was a kid, he’s attending his classes, his meetings, and even having lunches with the princesses the Queen sends over. However, he can’t promise that these dates are leading up to a potential marriage. He’s doing just enough so that his mother doesn’t get suspicious. Best of all, for most nights, he gets to sneak into the kitchen and talk, bake, and laugh for hours.

The secret hangouts are going amazingly. He can tell she’s warming up to him as she did back then or maybe it’s just the fire from the oven heating up the place. Last week, the kitchen at her new bakery finally finished being built and he knows this because he hired his staff to make sure the job was done well without telling her. That day he expected her to come in and tell him that she had to stop seeing him, but she still showed up like clockwork – two to three times a week. 

Next week, her bakery is set to have its grand opening and Donghyuck hopes this isn’t what actually stops her from coming to see him. He’s even practiced his baking skills on his own and eaten less of the fruit while they’re together in hopes it doesn’t make her want to leave again. And so for the following week, Donghyuck is treading carefully.

“Do you need help with that, Princess?”

“Should I preheat the oven for you?”

“Here, let me tie your apron.”

“I’ll carry that for you.”

All of these mini acts of chivalry are met with a suspicious gaze and a light dusting of red on her cheeks. Donghyuck feels a sense of achievement whenever she accepts his help. And this all leads up to the night before her grand opening.

Donghyuck is lighting the last candle when the sound of keys unlocking the side kitchen door is heard. He quickly blows out the match before scurrying behind the table to greet her with a “Surprise!”

“Donghyuck! Don’t do that! God, I thought I was caught for sneaking in.”

He rolls his eyes at her lackluster reaction and reorients himself. 

“I said… Surprise!” He dramatically waves his arms around to show all the work he put into decorating the kitchen. She finally notices her surroundings and her eyes light up. Donghyuck can feel his heart soften, compared to how it was racing earlier trying to set all of this up without his staff.

“What… what is all of this?” Her hands are covering her mouth in disbelief. There are streamers and fairy lights gracing the walls and candles are littered all around the room. Donghyuck is standing in the center with a single cupcake in his hands.

“Congrats. I heard from the grapevine that your bakery opens tomorrow.” She laughs at his theatrics and sets her bag down to look at the cupcake he’s made. In messy red font, the top of the treat reads the name of her bakery. She almost wants to tear up.

“Only one? Are we sharing?” She takes the cupcake from his hands and he tries not to think too hard about her fingers touching his.

“Well, I made that myself, and I personally don’t trust that I didn’t mess up the recipe in some way. So if anyone’s getting food poisoning tonight, it’d be you.” He taps her nose. “Eat up!”

At that, her jaw drops and she keeps the cupcake at a distance as if it’s some nuclear substance.

“Do you secretly want me dead?” She laughs.

“Hey, when it comes down to a royal and a baker. The baker’s going.” Donghyuck mimics his throat being slit and bites his lip to stop himself from smiling too hard. He loves to mess with her.

“You are the worst. Way to look out for your people, your highness.” She begins to unwrap the cupcake, taking a sniff out of precaution.

“‘Your Highness’? Aw, Princess, don’t be like that.” He moves closer to her and she shifts back, tutting.

“Nope. As a baker under your kingdom, I will gladly sacrifice myself by eating this cupcake. Alone.” She dramatically curtsies before going in for a hesitant bite.

Donghyuck swiftly beats her to it and takes a large bite out of the other end as her lips touch the cupcake. Her eyes widen in shock and he sends her a wink before brushing the crumbs off his mouth.

“Now you can’t tell me I don’t care about my people,” He says while chewing the weird texture of his creation. Donghyuck smirks at the deer-in-headlights reaction she has on her face. 

She gulps, shaking her head so that her hair hides her blush. She sets the cupcake down, not wanting a reminder of how close his face just was.

“Well, it’s edible,” She jokes. Donghyuck’s tongue prods the inside of his mouth as he takes in what was supposedly a compliment.

“Says the one who took the smallest bite known to man,” He accuses, pointing at the cupcake.

“How was I supposed to take a bigger one when you practically shoved your face into it and devoured half?” Once again, she’s reminded of what just transpired and feels her cheeks growing warm.

“Ooo, did I make you flustered? Scared your lips were about to touch mine?” Donghyuck takes a step closer and brushes a nonexistent crumb off her lip with his thumb. He hopes she doesn’t feel his heart pounding like fireworks.

Like she can sense his fake confidence, she grabs his wrist. “Is that what you were thinking about when you took a bite? Kissing me?” She tilts her head to the side and his whole body buzzes.

Before he could crumble even further, he tears his hand out of hers. “Please. Like I’d let anyone touch these royal lips.” He turns around to calm himself down and pretends to busy himself with something on the fridge.

He hears her laugh behind him. “I bet they’re not as sweet as a baker’s.”

He turns around and narrows his eyes at her. “How did this grand opening celebration turn into you messing with me?” Accepting defeat, he resorts to fake anger and his signature pout.

“You started it,” She playfully rolled her eyes. “Anyways…”

With the softest smile, she says, “Thank you, Hyuck. I really appreciate you.”

He returns it, “Always.”

The rest of the night is filled with laughter and playful bickering as the two avoid finishing the mysteriously textured cupcake. Donghyuck makes multiple attempts to pit the blame on her as the teacher, and the soon-to-be bakery owner fails to leave and sleep early at the expense of the Prince’s whines. To be honest, the lack of sleep was worth it if she got to spend more time with him.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Now that the bakery is well past its grand opening and flourishing greatly, I’ve gotten my days back. My employees are well-trained and seasoned and I feel comfortable taking days off when I need to. Oddly, my new opened-up schedule was somehow sensed by Donghyuck and I was invited to the palace during the daytime for the first time ever. I was nervous at first to be sneaking in in broad daylight, but he assured me that if I followed the steps he gave me exactly, I’d be fine – not that reassuring. 

As written in his note, I greeted Yunseo, the guard, as usual, and he gave me weird looks, going back and forth between the sun and my face.

“You know the sun is out, right?” He asked, still looking at me funny.

I gave him the most incredulous look. “You’re joking? It’s not nighttime?” I made an effort to crazily look around and he sighed.

“Alright, alright, I get it,” He shook his head. “What are you doing here?”

“Thought I’d switch things up,” I shrugged, not wanting to reveal who I was meeting.

Yunseo nodded, “Fair… okay, be careful, okay? The palace feels a little frantic today.” With that, he opened the gates for me and I gave him a smile.

“You’re the best. Make sure to stop by sometime this week, I have pastries for you.” I waved goodbye as he promised to come. 

Following Donghyuck’s poorly drawn-out map, I realized our meeting point isn’t the kitchen and that he’s taking me on an obscure path that the Queen and King definitely are not aware exists. As I walk through centuries-old, dimly lit stone walls, I think about how many times Donghyuck has used these secret passageways and if little Donghyuck used these when he snuck out to see me, 15 years ago. I can imagine 7-year-old Donghyuck discovering these routes within the castle’s walls.

“Stop right there!” A voice echoes through the abandoned hallway.

My heart spazzes and as loud as my brain is yelling at me to run, my feet don’t budge. I curse under my breath and crumple Donghyuck’s map in my hands, remembering to kill him unless I die right here. And if I do happen to die here, then I have to make sure I return as a ghost, haunting that man for life. I turn around slowly, eyes half closed, to see who’s behind me, but there’s no one there. There’s no one in the passageway at all. I whip around a few more times to confirm and I notice a crack in the wall to my right. It’s a peephole overlooking the actual palace hallways.

Out of curiosity, I look through and I see the Queen, face as red as the beautiful gown she adorns.

“Prince Lee Donghyuck,” his name is spat out like bile. “You will follow my orders.”

Coming into view, I see Donghyuck. He and the Queen are in the middle of a heated argument. His head is hung low and I can see him playing with his sleeves like he does when he gets anxious. I wish to reach for him, but then I remember the wall separating us.

“Your majesty, I… I can’t. I don’t want to,” He hiccups, and if I can’t see the tears on his face, I can hear them. “I never did.”

The space in my chest feels as tight and narrow as the walkway I’m in and I want to look away, but I can’t.

“It doesn’t matter what you want. You are the Prince and you are expected to marry a Princess. How dare you fool me for all these years?” As the Queen, she still carries her natural elegance, but her words burn like acid. She’s speaking to him at a normal volume, but her tone pierces your ears. 

“I-I didn’t mean to fool you. I tried my best, but I don’t love them. I don’t love the suitresses you send. And I need you to understand that I never will.” Donghyuck finally looks up and I can see the desperation in his eyes from where I stand. 

“Love?,” The Queen laughs bitterly. “I don’t need you to love them. You just need to marry one. As the Prince, what makes you think you have the privilege of being in love? Not when you have a country to rule.” There’s less anger in her words and more disappointment. 

Donghyuck winces, looking like he’s fighting back what he wants to say. His bottom lip is trembling and the grip he has on his sleeves is tight. His whole body practically shakes. Eventually, he lets go.

“If I’m not meant to love someone, then explain to me why I already do. Explain to me why I love her? Explain to me why I can’t have her?!” 

Tears are rolling down his cheeks like heavy rainfall. “I never asked for this!” He screams, and I wonder to which he’s referring to. 

My body is sweaty like I ran a mile and I feel like my breathing can be heard through the wall. He never mentions my name, but I know, I can feel, that he’s talking about me. My whole body is buzzing and I don’t know whether to feel ecstatic or sad. Despite my confusion, one feeling is clear: fear. Before I can hear what the Queen has to say, I run. 

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

♔

“Oh God. Sorry, I was supposed to get here before you. I was supposed to be part of the surprise,” He smiles meekly, praying the puffiness from crying doesn’t make him look strange. He accidentally sniffles and hopes she blames it on the flowers and his chronic allergies.

She’s sitting in the garden chair next to the tea table Donghyuck had set up an hour ago. He scoped out a secluded spot in the royal garden and slowly put everything together. He moves to sit down across from her and she’s staring intently at the cup in front of her. 

“I asked Gran what your favorite tea is and brewed some for us. I know I don’t have your baking skills, but if we get hungry, we can sneak back to the kitchen,” he playfully winks, trying to hide the fact that he was in the worst state five minutes ago. Although he can’t bake, he can definitely make a good batch of tea. He hopes it hasn’t gone cold. 

He waits for a response, but she’s still frozen, chewing the inside of her cheek. Maybe he’s still on edge from his argument with the Queen, but she doesn’t look happy. This is definitely not the reaction he was expecting.

“Do you wanna try the tea? I bet it’ll amaze you so much, you’ll beg me for the recipe,” he teases. The teapot hovers over her cup, but she makes no move to accept it.

“Okay, no tea. That’s fine,” Donghyuck chooses to laugh it off. “Do you wanna walk around? Most of the garden is secluded so we don’t have to worry about someone catching us.”

“Would that be so bad?” The first words she whispers strike him with confusion. Her voice is dry like she just strained it.

“Huh?” He tilts his head, scooting his chair in closer to hear her.

“Would that be so bad?” She says, unable to bate her anger. “Being caught with me? Would his royal highness hate being found walking with me?”

“Hey,” Donghyuck grabs her hand from her lap, interlocking his fingers. “What’s going on?” She tears her hand out from his hold like it stung and he feels like he’s making mistake after mistake.

“I-I’m sorry, is this too much? I wanted to do something nice for our first date outside of the kitchen. Was this a mistake?” He starts to stack the plates, quickly discarding his work. “I usually don’t plan these myself, so I’m sorry if this is bad. I-”

Donghyuck sees her wince in his peripheral and feels her hand on his wrist as he’s about to haphazardly dump the tea in the bushes. Her hands are cold today.

“Date?” The word leaves her mouth as if it made her sick.

The alarms go off in Donghyuck’s mind. “Date? Did I say date? Sorry, I actually mean-”

“Donghyuck,” she cuts him off. He can see her harshly swallow. “Why are you doing this?”

He blinks. “I… I wanted to do something nice for us. It doesn’t have to be romantic if you don’t want it to be. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” Donghyuck can feel himself beginning to ramble.

“No. Why have you been hanging out with me? If it’s because you feel guilty about ditching me all those years ago, forget about it. I don’t care anymore.” She looks at him with so much intensity, not only trying to convince him, but convince herself that none of this matters.

“Princess, please. No, it’s not out of pity. You know that.” He shakes his head almost violently, begging her to believe his honest intentions. He was shocked he had to convince her in the first place, always assuming she knew his heart better than him.

Completely ignoring him, she continues, “And why aren’t you married yet?”

“W-what?” Similar to whiplash, Donghyuck feels like his brain has just been jostled. Are his ears tricking him and forcing him to relive the traumatic conversation he just had with his mother? Why is this topic being brought up?

“You’re the Prince,” she says like it’s an unwavering fact. “You’re meeting with princesses weekly. You’re meant to rule side by side as King and Queen. Why… why aren’t you married yet?” She asks and her eyes are ice cold like her hands. 

She too closely resembles the older woman who was just yelling at him moments ago. The casing around his heart begins to harden and the feeling he gets from the girl in front of him is now anger. The same bitter taste returns in his mouth.

“Are you serious?” He looks at her and the Donghyuck she knows has washed away. Betrayal, rage, and sorrow are painted across his face. It was like she was looking through the peephole again.

“Don’t ask stupid questions you know the answers to,” he mutters, words barely making it past his tight lips. He’s breathing much harder than before.

“Answer me. Why. Aren’t. You. Married.” Her hands are gripping the edge of her knees to stop them from shaking. 

Donghyuck stares at her for a long time, eyes flittering over every facial feature, confirming that she actually wants to hear the answer. Her face is firm and her question is set. He takes a deep, pained breath and leans back slightly.

“It’s because I love you.” Not like the confession he imagined in his head, Donghyuck reveals his long-term feelings like this was their end and not their new beginning. The period at the end of a sentence. The last page of a hardcover book. The last second on a timer.

She simply nods, stiff in the neck. She excuses herself before standing up, bowing, and walking away.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

“That’ll be $6.06. Would you like your receipt?”

The cash register dings with another purchase and I slump back in my chair as the customer leaves. It was a slow and agonizing shift with only two more hours till closing. It’s also been a slow and agonizing two weeks. 

I’m haunted by what went down at the royal garden almost every hour of the day. At first, I was using every chance I could get to skip work and wallow at home. But suddenly the plants in my room reminded me of him and the teacups in my cabinets smelled like the tea he prepared for us. So for the second week, I decided to dedicate myself to work. I’ve been coming in every single day and overworking myself to the point where my employees don’t know what to do but stand around. I debate whether or not to let them leave early when a familiar head of brown hair walks in. My heart picks up its pace and it’s like the teacups all over again.

“Donghyu- oh. Hi, welcome!” I smile wide, trying to hide the previous disappointment drawn on my face. The customer gives me an awkward smile back and begins browsing the pastry racks as I mentally slap myself.

I slump down to the floor behind the counter and silently groan in my hands. Why does every male brunette customer these past two weeks remind me of him? And why are there so many of them? Like every other time I’ve confused a customer with Donghyuck, the guilt begins to creep back into my system and I get flashbacks of our last conversation. 

“Why aren’t you married?,” I mock my own voice. “Are you stupid?” I repeatedly hit my palms against my head when I hear a ding from the counter bell. I quickly shoot up and brush the bangs out of my face, hoping the customer thinks I’m at least slightly normal.

“Hi, how can I hel- Grandma!” On instinct, I glance behind her, foolishly hoping he’s hiding behind her tiny frame, and my shoulders slump when I’m met with no one. So now I’m really imagining him.

“What are you doing here?” I ask, composing myself.

“Just checking in on you. I notice you haven’t been coming to the kitchen because when I come in in the mornings, my counter is actually clean,” she jokes. I smile sheepishly and nervously adjust the apron string around my neck. 

“Sorry, it’s usually Donghyuck’s fault,” I quickly clear my throat, answering a little too fast. “The Prince, I mean.”

Grandma’s eyebrows shoot up at the mention of his name and she looks down at her feet, suddenly fidgety. I notice her change in demeanor instantly. 

“Speaking of him…”

“We don’t need to,” I cut her off. “Speak about him, I mean.” I wince at how suspicious my words sound.

“If you don’t want to, that’s okay. I’m just curious… if anything happened between you two.” She whispers the last part, looking back at the customer to make sure he can’t hear. She clears her throat and steps behind the counter with me, naturally rearranging the bread in the display case. She busies herself while encouraging me to speak.

I gnaw on my lip, tapping the counter, debating if I should finally talk it out with someone. I’ve only been talking to my employees about bread starters and yeast.

“We fought.” I admit.

“About?” Grandma loads the case with more bread. I start passing them to her one by one. 

“He told me… he told me he loved me.” I press my lips together and I hear her head hit the top of the display case and the bread hit the floor. “Grandma! Are you okay?”

I crouch down, grabbing the top of her head to inspect, and she’s giving me the most incredulous look.

“He told you he loved you?!” She squealed at an embarrassingly non-discrete volume, making the customer drop the pastry in his hands. He’s looking around, frazzled, and I can see him debate whether or not he should pick it back up.

“Don’t worry about it! I’ll clean it up!” I screamed from behind the counter. 

“Grandma, keep it down,” I curse through my teeth.

She’s rubbing her head and shaking it in either pain or confusion.

“I know, I know. A Prince saying he’s in love with the baker’s granddaughter is farfetched and unrealistic. I get it.” It’s what has been circling through my brain every day.

“That’s not what I’m confused about, dear.” She looks like she’s debating what to say next. “Did you not hear?”

“Hear what?” At the end of my question, and like a universal sign, the door jingles and the mailman is rushing in, hair swept back by the wind. 

“Sorry! I forgot to drop this off this morning. It’s urgent mail.” He salutes and is out the door as quickly as he enters. 

On the counter is a letter with the royal stamp. My stomach feels queasy assuming this is the first contact I’ve had from Donghyuck since our fight, but I can’t help the naive smile that breaks out on my face. I rush to open it, not worrying about the papercuts. Every doubt that was just in my head disappeared and my grandma interjects, hoping to bring me back down from my high.

“Sweetie, wait. I need to tell you that-”

To the owner of Princess Bakery,

Prince Lee Donghyuck will be celebrating his union with Princess Nam Soohae on 26 May, 2023 at the royal garden grounds. The royal family requests a wedding cake to be made with your expertise and culinary skills. 

Please accept this royal assignment with details soon to come.

Signed,

The Lees

The words on the page silenced me and my thoughts, my breaths barely leaving my lips. My eyes kept darting across the paper; the calligraphed words are being repeated over and over again in my brain. 

Prince Lee Donghyuck.

His union.

Wedding cake.

Realization finally dawns that this isn’t the love letter or apology I was expecting from Prince Donghyuck. A breath finally escapes and it’s shaky as it wavers in the air like an offkey music note. A heart-stopping pain envelopes my chest and it seizes up to my eyes. The whites of the paper burn my irises. I catch a teardrop splattering onto the parchment. I’m haunted with images of Donghyuck at the altar with someone else. And then I’m thinking about the garden. And us. 

Surprise.

Our first date.

Because I love you.

Because he loves me? Because Prince Lee Donghyuck loves me? Prince Lee Donghyuck who is getting married to an actual princess in a week? Suddenly, it feels like the floor’s unsteady and the oven temperature was turned up to the highest. The letter wrinkles between my fingers and the ink smudges with salty tears. 

This is what I was afraid of. And yet this is what I set myself up for. I knew I should have stopped seeing him. I knew it the moment mango tarts began to remind me of him. The moment my secret ingredient of love found in every bake was powered by him and his place in my heart. Even though I meant to stop this from happening during our talk in the royal garden, that small teaspoon of hope was still sprinkled in my mind. That hope stayed every time I saw a plant, a teacup, or a brunette. But now it’s dissolved.

A new feeling washes over me. One that I haven’t felt once these past two weeks. Not false hope. Not heartbreak. And not regret.

Anger. 

“Don’t blame him.” 

My grandma’s words slice through the red and her hands on my arms attempt to calm me down. I look up through wet lashes, lips trembling.

“Donghyuck… Prince Donghyuck had no say. The royals… they never do.”

“Aren’t you supposed to be my grandma?” I clench my jaw to stop the shaking, slightly regretting my bitter words. 

Her grip is softer. “Oh honey, I am. And that’s why I’m telling you not to waste this energy on being mad at him. What you guys share is beautiful, don’t let this taint it.” She takes the letter out of my hands and physically turns me to face her.

“Shared,” I corrected her.

“Share,” She corrects me. “Your love for each other is seen by everyone. I know it can’t flourish the way love is supposed to, but at least cherish it for what it was.”

Her words reintroduce more feelings. Sorrow. Frustration. 

“I was really hoping this time it works out…” She voices my thoughts.

At this point, I’m hiccupping between breaths, caught between reliving the past and hearing these explanations. The world was never meant to have us together it seems. But at least I was told this time we had an ending.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

The next royal letter came two days after the first, and I was called to spend a week in the royal palace to test out different wedding cakes. I essentially had no choice but to say yes as the royal chauffeurs picked me up every morning to take me there. It felt like those sunrises with my grandma when I was seven but the butterflies in my stomach turned into bees. Unlike the past, I prayed I wouldn’t run into Prince Donghyuck, but with him having requested I make his cake, I’m sure he knows I’m here.

My grandma designated a portion of the kitchen to me as the head baker and it mimicked the old days as much as it could. That was until I got a visitor on the second day.

“Good morning! I’m Princess Nam Soohae.”

My eyes widened and my whisk fell out of my grasp as I took in her presence. She’s beautiful. She’s an actual princess. Her bright, toothy smile would’ve made anyone smitten if it weren’t for the fact that she was about to marry the man I loved. The pretty pink dress she wore was tinted green through my eyes. I shook my head, trying to remind myself of my place. 

“Good morning,” I bowed. “I’m the baker in charge of your wedding cake.” My smile faltered only slightly with the mention of the union.

She giggles and I almost want to laugh with her. “I know that, silly. I was sent by the Queen to sample some. Or should I say my future mother-in-law.” She bites her perfectly manicured nail with excitement.

Soohae leans her hands on the counter and peers at the bowl in my hand.

“Is there any to try right now?” Her head surveys the kitchen like a kid looking for cookies. It’s genuinely hard to dislike her.

“Um, I have a few cakes placed to the side to cool right now. There’s no frosting on it yet, but I’m sure it’d be good to try the base first!” I move to grab one of the trays and she flutters to follow me.

“Ooooh!” She gushes. “I’m so excited to try it. My own wedding cake, can you believe it?”

“No.” I almost drop the cake. “I mean, yes? Sorry. Getting married to the one you love is… it’s a crazy thing.” I cut a piece of cake and place it on a plate for her.

She doesn’t hesitate to take a bite and as she chews, she thinks. 

“I don’t love him yet, to be honest. This cake is really good, by the way.” I start cutting a slice from the other cake to sample. “But I know I will love him eventually. I already get butterflies when I look at him. I trust that he’s the one for me, I mean have you seen him?”

Before I can agree, and thank god she doesn’t give me a second to, she continues, “I know it’s silly for a person in my position to believe in the one. But I really, really do think it could be him. The other day he brought me my favorite flowers, like how did he know?!” She pops a bite of the other cake in and her eyes light up.

“Oh this is the one! Don’t even think about giving me another,” The Princess reaches for another bite and applauds me.

I laugh and make sure to note to go with the lemon base and not the mango one. As my hands are about to toss the mango cake away, my mind stops me and I consider whether Donghyuck would prefer this instead. The clanking of the Princess’s fork on the plate, finishing the lemon cake slice till it’s crumbs, reels me back and I let the cake fall into the garbage. It feels eerily like a metaphor.

For the rest of the week, Princess Soohae visits me and taste tests the frosting, fondant, and other things she wants. With every passing day, I hear more about Haechan and I can feel that her words have turned fonder. Coincidentally, her sweet tooth has gotten worse and the final components of the wedding cake are a complete sugar bomb like her personality.

On my final day, the Queen joins her. The last time I saw her majesty, she was berating the Prince as I secretly watched. It felt like I was in that hidden passageway again as she watches me prepare a slice of the wedding cake for her. My hands shake, placing the plate down in front of her and her gaze is sharp. It’s interesting how harsh her energy is when her facial features are as soft as the Prince’s. She looks like she’s been through a lot and I wonder if Donghyuck will experience the same thing when he fulfills his role as King. Like she can tell I’m thinking about him, The Queen’s eyes narrow. 

“I hope you enjoy,” I bow, and she doesn’t say a word. Princess Soohae on the other hand is completely bubbling over how good it turned out and how her guests are sure to love it too. 

The Queen simply nibbles on a piece and nods along. The black and white vibes almost give me whiplash as I stand there, watching the two of them. A sweat forms on my hairline and I’m internally glad this is my last day. I can’t go through this any longer. 

And like a karmic jinx, the kitchen door opens and a familiar brunette walks in. This time, it is him.

“Oh my! Prince Donghyuck!” Princess Soohae scrambles off her chair and bows both gracefully and clumsily. I bow as well, trying hard to hide the immediate blush on my face I get whenever I see him. I wonder if I can stay bowing so I don’t have to meet his face. The last time we saw each other was when we talked at the royal garden, and as much as I prayed I wouldn’t run into him here, truthfully, a part of me also hoped I would.

As soon as I force myself to stand up straight, we lock eyes and the strain in my chest loosens like a snapped thread. I can feel my lungs fill with air and it’s relieving to see him again after so long. It hurts in the best way as I’m overwhelmed by his presence. That familiar brown waved hair, the sunkissed tan skin, and the plump smiley cheeks. Everything is how I left it but his expression is not one I expected. He’s in complete shock and I don’t know what to do but look around the room to find something that would cause such surprise. I quickly glance at the Queen, and for the first time since she sat down, there’s a small lift in the corner of her mouth. Is she smirking?

“Princess?” He tilts his head, still staring at me before he realizes what he just called me. “Princess! Princess Soohae! I came to get you.” He runs over to grab her hand and the lifted cheekbones on her face tells me she’s grinning. 

“What- uh- what’s going on?” I’m fixated on the way he fiddles with her hand as he looks around the room for answers. 

“Cake testing? How did you forget, silly?” Princess Soohae laughs as she playfully pats his cheeks. Everyone in the room can tell she’s head over heels and my stomach hurts. As I’m clutching my stomach and the Prince stares at me quizzically, there’s one person in the room watching all of this go down.

“She’s the wedding cake baker we outsourced, Prince Donghyuck.” The Queen says calmly, gesturing to me. She tells him like it’s his first time hearing this and I’m taken aback, my movements making the utensils on the table quiver slightly.

“He didn’t know?” My mouth was too quick to voice my thoughts. “His highness, I mean.” I bow in apology.

“No. No, I didn’t.” His hands are at his side now, gripping the fabric of his sleeves. The shock left his face and now he’s staring at me with pity and then silent anger when his head turns towards the Queen. My eyes follow his and she returns his look as if to challenge him to say more. 

Completely obvious to the shift in atmosphere, Princess Soohae raves about the final wedding cake decisions and begs the Prince to try a bite. He turns her down without sparing a glance and asks her to leave with him. He doesn’t give me a second thought as he breaks eye contact with the Queen and drags his future wife away. There’s no stopping the ache that fills my chest again, slow but strong like the rising tide.

“So he still likes you.”

Snapped out of my haze, my ears don’t believe the words I hear coming from the Queen’s lips.

“Pardon?” She’s looking at me now and it’s a mixture of disappointment and disinterest etched on her face. The warmth on her face has depleted. 

“My son. Prince Donghyuck. He still likes you,” she laughs dryly. “After all these years…” 

My eyebrows furrow and I feel myself getting dizzy. Maybe this is all some sort of hallucination and the Queen isn’t talking to me right now. I grip the counter for support, and she doesn’t wait for me to respond.

“You know, I thought I handled the issue 15 years ago when I asked the head baker to stop bringing you here. I was stupid to think it would be that easy when he purposely sabotaged every date I set up for him the years after.”

She’s twirling the fork on the plate now and the scrapes make me flinch. The kitchen no longer feels like a safe space for me right now as her words slowly suffocate me. 

“And when he started to actually go on these dates this year and report back to me that they’re going well? I was foolish to think it was him beginning to try. I saw you one day, back in this kitchen. Back in his life. It all made sense and it made me so angry.” Her hands grip the fork handle. They’re dainty, but if you look close, they’re calloused, indicating years of work. Her face appears the same. If it weren’t for the terrifying state I was in, I would’ve wanted to comfort her. She looks up at me, and I felt tinier than I did before, her eyes piercing into me. 

“Do you not understand the life I’m trying to set up for Donghyuck? He’s the future king. He needs a queen, a real queen to survive in this world. As the queen, I know firsthand what he needs. My king wouldn’t be anywhere without me and his mother who set me up with him. You’re not fit for this role and you never will be.” She finally sets the fork down with a clatter. 

“Listen to me, and let him go. It’s what’s best.” Her threatening nature fades as quickly as it came and she gracefully stands up, brushing the nonexistent debris on her gown. The Queen gives me one final look, waiting for me to bow and essentially agree, before leaving the kitchen. 

The air returns and I grasp my chest to let myself breathe. Tears prick the corner of my eyes as I choke back sobs.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

“Remember, it’s the room on the right hallway. Third door. And if anyone sees you, don’t tell them I sent you. I’ll get in trouble.” My grandma hammers in the details one more time, waiting for me to nod in confirmation.

It’s the end of my final day and she asked me to deliver pastries to a room in the palace before I leave, saying her workload is too large to be going herself. I figured it’s one more thing I could do before I never step foot in the palace again. I almost turned her down earlier in fear of running into the Queen. Just the thought of that happening makes me feel sick, but I know I won’t be seeing her again after this anyways.

I scoff, “So you’d rather I get sent to the guillotine?” I tease her with an exaggerated horrified look. 

She easily flicks my forehead, despite our height difference, and I grab it wincing. “You’re lucky I don’t chop off your head myself with that attitude of yours.” She sneers at me and I giggle.

“Fair…,” I playfully mutter, soothing the area between my brows.

Her directions sent me to a room with beautiful brown double doors. I smile at the two ladies standing outside of it and I’m about to explain why I’m here before they cut me off.

“Pastry delivery for the Prince?” They say in unison.

Like a horror movie, my jaw drops and I lose my instinct to run. One thing I do know is to make sure I yell at my grandma later as I nod and tell them they’re correct. She completely set me up.

On another occasion, I would’ve appreciated the doors to Prince Donghyuck’s bedroom more, but right now, they look like the gates of Hell. I attempt to swallow whatever saliva was left in my suddenly dry mouth as I brushed my hair out of my face. The ladies allow me to knock on the door. My palms are sweaty as I shakily knock on the varnished wood, hearing it echo into the space on the other side. His room must be huge.

No responses are heard. This was my out, but my body was telling me not to leave, even though my mind was screaming to run. Instead of knocking again, I turn the knob and almost wish it wasn’t unlocked, but it was.

There he is on the other side, scribbling at his desk. His back is facing me and I watch the muscles in them move with vigor. I haven’t seen him work this hard since he convinced me to teach him how to make a creme brulée and accidentally made scrambled eggs with the yolks.

I shut the door behind me and hope it catches his attention, but it doesn’t. I gulp, realizing how very real this situation is and I almost want to throw up knowing I have to speak.

“Hyuck.”

I hear him inhale and he spins quickly out of his chair to look at me. Different to how it felt seeing him in the kitchen earlier today, his face is softer, accepting my presence. My heart floats in my chest, wondering why I was so nervous to see him when just the sight of him oozes comfort. He looks at me like he’s feeling the same way. I see the longing in his eyes and the way they warm, I close my own to stop myself from giving in too much.

“Princess.”

His voice is fragile and his choice of words makes me shut my eyes harder, scared that I’d lose all my resilience and run straight into his arms. He doesn’t correct himself this time, and he says it again with more confidence.

I finally peel them open and force myself to act cold. Just an hour ago I was finishing his wedding cake; this fire has to be extinguished.

“Princess Soohae will make a great queen.” I move to set the pastry basket down on a table near me.

“It’s not what you think. I was going to-“ He turns around in a frenzy and grabs the paper he was just writing on. The Prince takes a step closer and it takes all my strength to recoil. It takes all of me not to be swayed by the obvious hurt on his face. This will be good for us, I have to remind myself.

My hand is up, drawing the line. “You don’t have to explain. It’s not what I’m here for.”

He hesitantly puts his arm down, eyebrow twitched in confusion. The paper is still in his hands.

“I got you a gift,” I partly smile. “A wedding gift and I guess, also… a goodbye gift.” With that statement, I break away from his stare, fixating on a corner in his grand room. 

I hear paper wrinkling. “A goodbye gift?” His voice gets lower and it causes me to wince. It feels like all the tension in the room gathered in the small vacancy in my chest and the overwhelming pressure makes my eyes sting. I can already feel the tears build up as I play with the hem of my shirt. 

“Mhm,” I painfully affirm. “The wedding cake. It’s both my gift and my goodbye. I thought you requested it when I first got the royal letter,” I laugh at the situation, trying to stop myself from letting him see me cry.

“Turns out it wasn’t you, but regardless. You’re getting married and I can’t be here anymore. So I left it in the kitchen. Obviously, it’s not a goodbye-goodbye, since I’ll still be living here in the city, but… No. Yeah, it’s a goodbye,” I nod to myself, trying to unravel the knot in my throat. “I guess you took my advice, huh? Congratulations, your highness.”

The silence from him is thick and it leaves a sour feeling in my stomach. It calls me to look up at him, and his eyes are icy cold. The sweet honey brown is as dark as coal.

“This is your response?” His words are robotic, I can feel the venom on his tongue as it pricks at my heart.

“S-sorry?” I tilt my head, not understanding him. It felt terrifying to make him repeat himself in the state he’s in.

“I told you I loved you. I’m assuming this is your response.” My eyes flicker to the paper in his fist, no longer readable. Neither is his face as he gives me the blankest look. It makes me want to cry more knowing this is how I will remember our last moments.

This time, I do take a step towards him but he’s shaking his head aggressively, lower back pressed against the edge of his desk. Now I know how he felt.

“If you want to hear me say ‘I love you’, you know I can’t do that.” Just having those three words leave my lips causes a tear to roll down my cheek. 

“Because I’m the Prince?” This time, his expression changes to match mine. I can feel the frustration and pain radiating off of him, and all I want to do is to tell him what he needs to hear. But I just nod, forcing a distance.

“So it always mattered. What if… what if it was 7-year-old Donghyuck asking his princess? What would you have said? You didn’t know who I was back then. I was just… just Donghyuck.” He sighs, his body is limp as he settles onto his desk. I notice his frail build, worried that he’s been eating less.

I smile, fondly remembering the ignorant bliss from 15 years ago. But then I’m forced to remember our situation now, our ugly situation where our hearts are demanded to stay silent. 

“I would’ve told him I loved him too.”

And with that, all strength is gone as I sob into my palm. I’m trying to force the wails in, but my body is shaking. My legs feel weak and he’s over here and his arms are wrapped tightly around me in a second. I can feel his heart beating against my arm trapped between our bodies and his breath shakily blowing on the top of my head. One hand is holding me tight and the other is brushing through my hair as he shushes me. 

“I love you. I love you. I love you,” He repeats. A part of me thinks this is to calm himself down too. 

I know I’m right when I slowly pull myself back and see the red in his eyes and on the tip of his nose. My hand flinches as I’m about to caress his cheek. His breath is steadier as it now fans across my face and his eyes are lidded like they’ve finally got some rest. My hesitation vanishes as I let myself cup his face, trace the constellation painted on his cheek, and feel the sweetness of his lips on mine. The warm sensation that envelops my body makes me gasp and Donghyuck tightens his embrace on me, refusing to let go. He tasted better than every sweet treat I’ve had combined. He was intoxicating and my whole body buzzed like a sugar rush. 

I close my eyes tighter, savoring the feeling of his lips, wanting to remember every trace — letting myself be selfish this last time. He’s sugary, cozy, and soothing like the afternoon sun on my back. His mouth moves with such ease against mine and it feels like I’ve been kissing him my whole life. The feeling of his tongue gently nudging my bottom lip jolts me back to reality and I push away, seized by the cold air of his big room again. 

I bring my hands to my face, hoping to cool down the flush. The Prince is breathing as heavily and in sync with me, and all I can hear is our matching breaths and the ringing in my ears. I have to end it here. 

“Um. Congratulations on your wedding,” I say in one breath. I don’t dare look at him as I quickly bow, scrambling to his door. 

“Princess! Wait,” He grabs my wrist, almost too tight. “I can’t go through with this. Please, I-I only want to marry you.”

“Your highness…”

“Don’t. Don’t call me that. Say my name, please. Call me Hyuck. Call me Donghyuck. Anything but that. Just don’t-“ His teeth are chattering and he blinks away the tears. “Don’t leave me again.”

Without a second thought, I’m shaking my head ‘no.’ Even with tears blurring my vision, I can see the hurt on his face and I feel a part of my heart rot. It pains me just as much to reject him, but the Queen’s words swirl around in my head, unrelentless. I’m forced to leave him and my heart here and I want to scream, but I can’t. He notices that. It reminds him of himself.

Letting the finality of my decision settle in, he lets go of me, taking in a shaky breath. This was our end.

I restrain myself from taking any steps towards him as I reach for the door behind me. The wooden panel swings open, gliding past my extended fingers as I’m met with the face of the Queen.

That same hand shoots up to touch my lips, remembering what just happened in here and I bow till my hair grazes the tiled floors. 

“Your Majesty,” I squeak. She looks at me with a million emotions and plants her glare at the Prince. Like pieces of a puzzle coming together, her face twists into anger, dissecting the situation. I take this as my cue to leave but the Queen shuts the door behind the both of us. I don’t hear the Prince make any moves to save me.

“What were you doing in there?” She angrily whispers between clenched teeth. Not sure what comes over me, but the fear I felt before is gone. Instead, I’m left feeling numb.

“Don’t worry. I was just saying goodbye.” I swallow, bracing myself for her reprimands. 

A beat passes, before she speaks, this time in a normal tone. “Are you done?” 

I nod, “Yes, and I’d like to be excused from attending the wedding to serve the cake.” The Queen’s eyebrows quirk up, shocked that I’ve made a request. I look her straight in the eyes so she knows I mean it.

“I can’t… I can’t be there for that. I believe I’ve done all the preparation I can and I am not needed to actually attend.” My confidence waivers, and I draw my attention back to the ground.

“Fair enough. You don’t have to attend. I’ll tell the other bakers to serve it.” I take my chance to meet her eyes again and I can almost see concern on her face. I shake my head of that ridiculous thought, and offer her my best smile.

“Thank you, your majesty.” I bow before dragging my feet off the palace grounds. Hoping to never set foot in here ever again.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Bells. I plan to remove all bells from my bakery. The royal wedding bells have been ringing all morning and I don’t need any more reminders moving forward. 

I spent the whole night crying after leaving the palace and then my anxiety kicked in, trying to get me to map out my life without him. Naturally, I planned to pour myself into work and here I am, out of bed, manning the shop by myself on his wedding day. I may have cried into a batch of dough in the morning, but baby steps are important. This is only day one anyways.

I realized I made a mistake leaving the house when I overheard everyone in town talk about the wedding of the century. I even let my employees off for the day, mainly to have my space to wallow alone. Practically everyone was outside the palace gates, waiting to get a glimpse of the couple. The streets were currently empty and I wonder if I should just close up shop. 

Right when I was about to count up the cash and close out the register, the bell on the door jingles. I’m halfway into the one dollar bills when I roll my eyes at the sound, pressing my lips together to stop a groan. I make a mental note to remove the bell before I leave.

I look up to check on the customer and I see a man with, of course, brown hair surveying the bread on the back wall. All I can see is the back of his head as he peruses. I scoff to myself at the instant fluttering of my chest at yet another brunette customer. Is no one blond anymore? Are gingers that rare for me to never encounter one in my bakery?

I finish counting the ones and I move onto the fives when I realize he’s still standing in the same spot. I’m organizing the bills in my hands as I examine him. Normal guy. Black hoodie. Jeans. 

Maybe he’s just really indecisive. I can see him tapping his foot from the counter. I decide to offer help after I finish counting the five dollar bills.

With the last dollar to count, I place it in the tray and slowly walk over to the man. As I get closer, my stranger danger instincts kick in and I suddenly regret my decision. His foot is still shaking and from this close, I can see him fidgeting with his sleeves in front of him. I grab a pair of tongs from the closest case and approach him.

“Excuse me, sir? Can I help you find something?” I have the tongs gripped with both hands, discreetly but ready to swing. 

I see his body tense and my breath hitches, thinking I’m really going to have to hit this man with my makeshift weapon.

He turns around painstakingly slow and I raise the tongs instinctively to block my face, before letting out a squeal.

But then I see his face. And different bells go off.

“Oh my god. Hyuck?”

The bags under his eyes are prominent and I finally notice the way his hair has been pulled in different directions. His lips are dry as he cracks a sheepish smile. He’s rubbing the back of his neck and notices the kitchen utensil in my hands.

“Were you gonna hit me?!” His mouth is open in surprise and he’s taking the tongs from my hands. I let him and put my hands up in defense.

“You were standing there for so long, all fidgety! I’m alone in here, what was I supposed to think?” I fight back, taking the tongs back and clutching it close to my chest.

He lets out a long sigh, seemingly frustrated with himself as he runs his hands through his hair. I hate that I find it attractive.

“Wait.” He looks up at me through his lashes, swallowing. “What are you doing here?” I ask. He blinks, knowing that question was coming. 

I expected to feel sick awaiting his answer, but instead my heart is racing, anticipating his next words. I almost feel that false hope I felt a week ago, and I try hard to deny it. But the way he’s looking at me leaves me with no doubts. 

I’m about to push him out the door when he digs a hand into his pocket and pulls out a piece of paper. The wrinkled piece of paper from yesterday. He plays with it in his hands as he thinks about his next move.

“I was drafting a request to get the law changed.”

His words peak my interest. I set the tongs down and let him continue. Wrapping my arms around my waist for security, I’m fearful of what he has to say next.

“I’ve actually been working on it for the past two months.” He flattens the paper out in his hands. “You caught me finishing the final draft yesterday. I didn’t expect it to take up until my wedding day…” He laughs, unhumored by the situation. 

He hands it to me. “This is an old copy now, but it’s actually already being reviewed by the King. Right now. Being who I am, I fled just in case.” 

He looks at me anxiously as I read the top of the page, the words in bold:

Formal Petition to Repeal the Royal Marriage Ordinance 

Written By Prince Lee Donghyuck

My eyes don’t believe what’s written, like the royal letter I received not too long ago, requesting I bake the royal wedding cake. The same royal stamp and all rests in the top left corner. 

This time, I can read the words clearly. They settle into my chest, leaving me with such a funny feeling. I read the text and I can tell it’s written by him. I imagine him staying up every night after we meet in the kitchen, working by himself on this proposal. All of his hard work for the past couple months was printed on this very paper. All this work… for us. 

I feel my cheeks wet from pure joy and I cover the smile straining my mouth. A rush unfurls through my body like sweet, sweet sugar and I look up to share it with him. 

“Donghyuck… You-?”

“Marry me.” 

He gets down on one knee, holding my free hand. He’s rubbing that one spot on my ring finger and it feels unreal. The gleam in his eyes reminds me of the toasty fires in the oven, the glistening mangos on his favorite tart. His smile matches mine, nervous just slightly, and I want to paint this memory in my brain forever. The love and desperation in his eyes are begging me to think of him. Think of us. Every fear that had been eating away at me the past month was overcome by his pleas. This paper and his actions are proof that we can happen.

He continues, 

“Princess, please marry me. I’ve only wanted to marry you almost my entire life. I know that sounds crazy, but how can I doubt my obvious soulmate? You always come back to me, but I still don’t want another reason for you to have to leave. So please, trust me and trust us. Forget everything and everyone else and say you’ll marry me. If this petition doesn’t pass, I’ll continue to fight. Just…

Say you’ll be my princess forever.”

I tug his hand softly to get him to stand up. He obliges and I free my hands to hold his face. He finally breathes and closes his eyes, leaning into my touch. I can feel him relax and his hands rest on my hips, drawn like a magnet. My mind is bouncing back and forth trying to contain the frenzy in my heart and the steady warmth of my core. I tap his eyelid lightly with my thumb and ask him to look at me. He opens them slowly, fear still trickling in his irises. I smile at him.

“My Prince,” His breath hitches. “I love you too.”

Donghyuck wastes no time tucking his head into my neck and lifting me against his body. He spins me around between the cases of bread and I giggle, feeling his heart beat erratically against mine. He softly lets my feet touch the ground and we’re looking at each other again, tears adding sparkles to his eyes. I wipe them away instantly.

“Thank you for coming back,” he whispers, but it feels like he said it with his whole being.

“Always.” I say with just as much commitment.

We’re cherishing the moment together, laughing at how happy we get to be, when the wedding bells go off once more. I look at him with confusion and he shrugs, just as lost.

“I can’t believe my wedding cake is going to waste,” I pout, remembering all my hardwork. And he squeezes my hip at my choice to be silly, snickering.

“I can’t believe you went with a lemon cake. Do you even know me?” He teases, pretending to be hurt. I gasp, slapping his chest.

“I’ll make sure to go with the mango tarts for ours.” I press a soft kiss on his lips and he smiles with me, pulling me unbelievably closer. 

“I like the sound of that,” Donghyuck hums.

“I’m sure you do.” I laugh.

Donghyuck and I stand there in each other’s arms for as long as our legs allow. We talk about the past, how it felt to leave each other. We talk about the garden and I admit to catching him talk to his mom, which explains everything he needs to know. Even as I’m profusely apologizing, he’s doing the same, saying sorry for putting me in such a situation. I choose to ask about Princess Soohae and he bites his lip nervously, telling me he hasn’t handled that predicament yet. I almost drag him out of the bakery at the sound of that. We even go over his repeal proposal and I call him out for some typos.

Eventually we move to the kitchen, doing what we do best, and what we’ve done for years, waiting for someone to find him. The Prince and his Princess.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

A/N: i hope you enjoyed!! pls like, reblog, reply, whatever!! if u want hehe

#lee donghyuck #lee haechan #haechan fic #prince haechan #royalty nct #royal nct #nct dream #nct #nct fic #nct fanfic #nct dream fanfic #haechan oneshot #haechan blurb #haechan imagine #haechan scenario #haechan fluff #haechan angst #haechan fanfic #lee donghyuck fic #haechan x reader #lee donghyuck fluff #lee donghyuck fanfic #lee donghyuck imagine #lee donghyuck oneshot #nct writing #haechan writing #haechwrites #haechan #lee donghyuck x reader

[lovesosweeet]

better left unsaid // cth

chapter sixteen

in which orion has leukemia, and calum doesn’t know.

calum hood x fem!oc

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august 13, 2018 melbourne, australia calum

Waking up in Australia doesn't feel like it did a few years ago. It'll always be a special place, and I love being close to friends and family, but truly, it's not home anymore. LA is home.

Actually, now that I think about it, I don't know if that's true. I love LA. It's a rich mix of cultures, an incredible place for us to do our work, great friends are there, the weather can't be beat, and I really don't have any complaints about the city. I just know that there are many other cities that I could live with Orion and Duke that would feel like home, too.

That's where home is: with Orion.

I have to check my phone to see where we are today. I know we're in Australia for another few days, but exactly where we are on the continent and what day it is are two things I don't know without looking. When I tap the screen, it lights up with a few notifications and a photo of Orion and Duke hiding behind them as my background.

It’s only 7 am, which means I have a few hours before we’re escorted around for press interviews and then sound check and the show. Most of my notifications are normal stuff, just random emails about bills, each of the boys letting me know they made it back to the hotel safe last night, etc. I have a few texts from Orion, which is what I click first.

From: my love + stars good morning whenever you see this i miss you so much talk to you soon probs ily❤️

To: my love + stars hi good whatever time it is are you up? got time for a chat? xxx i miss you

Her texting bubble doesn't appear for a few moments, so I sigh and click through the rest of my notifications. There's nothing as exciting as hearing from her. I text my mum, who's still with us since we're still in Aus. All of our mums have joined us for the Australia leg, which we all have a love-hate relationship with.

I ask if she wants to grab breakfast with me, and she does, so I quickly get up and put on a shirt, some sweatpants, and a pair of slides in order to meet her in the hallway of the hotel we're at. She grins when sees me and reels me in for a hug as if we haven't spent the past several days together.

"Good morning," I tell her.

"Good morning," she says. "I already looked and found us a place to go, not too far. Are you ready?"

"Yeah, sure."

Mum and I walk through the fluorescent-lit hallway to the elevator, nodding at the security officer standing guard by it. We ride down to the lobby and head out the back door, running into Matt who's standing outside on a phone call that happens to end right as we're walking out.

"Back by 10:30, Hood!"

"Ay, ay, captain," I confirm, saluting him. Matt rolls his eyes and flips me off. I turn to Mum. "Which way is it?"

"Just this way," she says while she checks her phone for verification. She starts walking to the right, turning onto the street. A few fans are waiting, and I just wave and smile at them all. A stray security guy holds them back while Mum and I pass.

We walk about a block before she pulls me into a small cafe. It's busy, which is a good sign. Lots of business must mean it's good, right?

Mum and I stand in silence, both of us scanning the menu that's hanging on the wall. I pick out a basic breakfast sandwich and will just get an unsweetened latte like normal. If Orion were here, she'd scold me for getting something I can get in LA and she would push me to try something unique.

I look back to the menu, trying to see what I think Orion would get if she were here. I find it quickly. A pistachio rose latte and a kimchi bagel. She'd say they don't go together, but she couldn't choose to get only one of the two. They both sound so good, she'd say.

"Have you decided?" I ask Mum.

She nods. "Yeah, I think I'll just get the bacon egg and cheese and a black coffee."

I smile. Our orders are practically the same. "Sounds good. Wanna grab us a table and I'll order?"

"Perfect plan, thank you."

It used to be hard for her to let me pay for things, but thankfully, over time, she has accepted it and lets me pay now without a fight. She makes up for it by spoiling me with Aussie things when she visits the US, making all of my favorite foods while I'm home, helping clean the apartment, and taking Duke on walks.

I order our food and drinks, taking Mum's coffee from the cashier and plopping a few dollars into the tip jar. While I wait for our food, I take Mum her coffee. She's found a table outside under a blossoming tree, and she smiles at the sight of her hot drink.

"Oh, thank you," she says, happily taking the cup from me.

"'Course, Mum. Happy to buy you breakfast anytime."

She smiles, taking a sip of her coffee.

"Can I take a quick photo of you?"

Her smile grows. She's not as bad about it as Orion, but Mum is always asking for photos. "Yes, but we need one of us, too."

I agree, snapping a photo of her smiling under the tree with her coffee, and then pose for a quick selfie with her. "I'm gonna go back inside and wait for the food."

Once back in earshot of the baristas, so I can hear when they call my name, I open my photos again. Carefully, on the photo of my mum at the table, I draw a light blue stick figure on the chair that will be mine in a few moments. I draw some shoulder-length hair and add a pink heart next to it.

To: my love + stars Image attached pretending you're here with us. will have to bring you someday they have a pistachio rose latte

From: my love + stars WAIT HI SORRY I DIDN'T SEE YOUR LAST TEXT i have time for a chat but you're busy now so dw!! THAT SOUNDS SO YUMMY AND JOY IS SO CUTE

I silently curse our situation. I won't be able to call her until after the show tonight, since once Mum and I get back to the hotel we're headed out for interviews. Then we're going straight to soundcheck from interviews, and once sound check is over, we're typically off our phones and watching the opener, getting ready for the show, and just doing our general goofing off together while we get hyped up. Especially since our families are here, we are present in the moment backstage.

“Calum!” A barista calls my name, making me put my phone back in my pocket. I’ll reply to O later. I grab my latte and the two sandwiches and tell her thank you.

I bring the food out to the patio, giving Mum her sandwich and taking a seat on the empty chair. Mum unwraps her food and takes a picture of it.

I laugh. "Since when do you take pictures of your food, Mum?"

Mum smiles and shows me the picture of her sandwich. "I've been texting updates to Orion. You don't think she minds that there's meat on the sandwich, do you?"

I try not to let my chuckle turn into a full laugh. "Mum, I promise, she doesn't care." Orion is a staunch vegetarian — she has no intention of ever eating meat again in her entire life and she's vehemently against the meat industry, but she also would never expect or ask anyone else in her life to feel the same.

A wave of relief washes over her face and she nods. She types out some kind of text to go with the picture and then locks her phone.

"What else are you sending her?"

Her face lights up again and then she unlocks her phone again to show me her chain of texts with Orion. It's a mix of food she's eating, blurry photos of me onstage, sneaky pictures of me and the boys goofing off backstage, and sunsets. Orion's side of the conversation consists of pictures of Duke and Emelia, coffees, and views of sunsets from our balcony.

I had no idea they were talking this much, and I'm almost a little envious of the pieces of their lives they're sharing with each other but not with me. At the same time, I adore that two of the most important people in my entire life are becoming closer, despite living on different continents and having several years of age between them.

"I'm glad you guys are friends," I say, sliding her phone back across the table.

"How can I not love her?" Mum asks.

It's rhetorical and it's true. I am quite biased, but I can't imagine someone not liking Orion once they spend more than a few minutes with her.

"She loves you," I say. I also feel like Orion loves everyone. It's one of her many incredible traits: she sees the good in anyone and anything.

Mum scoffs. "She loves you."

My cheeks get hot with that and I can't help but smile. "Yeah, I mean, the feeling's mutual."

—

The day flies by. It's a whirlwind of interviews and drives to other interviews and then we're back at the venue, our families all waiting for us backstage.

"Soundcheck in 20, boys!" Matt yells out before he disappears down a hallway. His job never ends.

"Hey, I'm gonna go call O really quick. Haven't gotten to talk to her at all today," I tell Ashton, turning toward the dressing room.

"Yeah, of course, tell her I say hi?"

I nod, patting his shoulder.

"Wait, we all say hi!" Luke yells.

"Actually, I say hey!" Michael follows up, and I just roll my eyes at their antics.

While I walk, I'm tapping around on my phone to call her. I press the phone to my ear and walk into the dressing room, flopping onto the couch as it starts to ring.

It rings three times before she picks up.

"Hi."

Her tone is curt, short, and neutral. She's mad. I brace myself for impact.

"Hi, how was your day?"

"Fine."

She's not giving me anything here, and I wince. My absence from her today must have her feeling upset. I wish she'd just say that, but I also know that she's told me several times that she has been having a hard time adjusting to life without me there with her, and I've basically ignored her all day. I can understand why she might be unhappy with me.

"I'm sorry I've not been texting much today, it's just so busy with our families here and the press all day."

Orion's side of the call is quiet for a few seconds while she calculates the right thing to say. That's how she is when she's upset: calculated. It's either incredibly calculated or she can't hold any of her emotions back. There's no in between. The precision comes when she's been stewing on something for a while.

"Joy didn't seem to have a problem with keeping up with me today. Or yesterday. Or any of the other days that y'all have been in Aus. I think Ashton has texted me more than you have, and we aren't dating."

I don't doubt that Mum has been texting her more than I have, but Ashton? If he's in contact more than we are, then I definitely feel like I've been slacking. It's been a long time since I've been in a committed relationship while on the road. I realize that while Orion and I were together the last time we did a big tour, she didn't realize we were actually dating.

I feel my heart drop a few inches. I don't know what I expected. We live together and have spent so much time together that I don't have a lot of experience with us being apart anymore. I feel like I've been making an effort to stay connected to Orion, but maybe I haven't been making enough of an effort.

Orion sighs and I realize I've been thinking for too long.

"Fuck, I'm sorry, that came off more harsh than I meant it—"

"No, you're fine," I say, cutting her off. "I'm sorry."

I am. She's the most important person in my life, and she deserves to feel like she is.

"Do you want to send me your class and work schedule? I can get Matt to give me mine for the week every week, and each week we can plan a time for each day that we can talk?" It's the most logical way—find a gap and cement it with time for her.

"Cal," she says sadly. Was that not what I should've said?

"I'm sorry, O, is scheduling a time not good for you? I want you to feel like—"

"No, sorry, I just... we don't have to talk on the phone." Her voice is still quiet and veiled in a thin layer of sadness.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, it's nice to hear your voice. I just wish you'd take a few seconds to reply to my texts, even if it's just a heart or something, or if you're headed into an interview just give me that heads up." Her words are still slow, like she's tiptoeing across them like rocks in a stream. "I appreciate calls, just more consistency throughout the day, I guess, would be nice?"

Today especially, I've been pretty much offline. Aside from the handful of texts I'd sent her this morning, it's been almost 7 hours since I last texted her. Yesterday wasn't that different, and neither was the day before. I know that she's right. I really haven't been talking to her that much.

"Yeah, of course, I'll be better—"

"Sorry, and I don't want to be a girlfriend who wants to hear back from you instantly every time and I don't mean that you can't just, like, live in the moment and have fun with everyone. I don't want you to feel like you have to be on your phone constantly to keep me happy, either."

Here it is, the side of Orion where she doesn't have a filter to keep some thoughts inside.

"O, I don't think you're being unreasonable," I say, hoping that'll calm her mind a little. "I will try to be better."

Orion sighs again. "Thank you."

"How was your day today?" I ask. I think our crisis is averted. "It's Sunday there, right?"

"Oh, it was fine. Macy came over and we watched a few movies. Oh, and we split a bottle of wine and watched the sunset on the balcony. That was nice."

I wish I could've watched the sunset on the balcony with her. I remember when we first moved in, Orion would set a timer for 10 minutes before the sunset every night so we could go watch it. After the first night, she insisted we get more mirrors so that the colors can reflect all over the house. We have dozens of pictures of us sitting in golden hour together on that balcony.

It's not happening anytime soon, but one day, when I propose, I'm either doing it on that balcony or on a balcony in Madrid (at sunset of course.)

"Sounds like you and Macy are hanging out a lot?"

Orion laughs. "Yeah, I really like her. She's fun. How's today? I know Joy's been having a great day. The mums all went to get pedicures."

I'd wondered how they were filling their time while we were off with press. Orion isn't even here and she knows more about what the others are doing than I do.

"Oh, y'know," I say. "Same as always. Interviews where I don't really talk, bullying Luke. Walked around a park with Mum this morning."

"Cal, I always tell you. Bullying your best friends isn't okay."

"Babe, he knows we're joking."

"Cal," she warns, and I can picture her stern expression. If she were here, she'd be wagging a finger at me.

"Don't say it," I plead.

"As your former best friend Harry Styles says, treat people with kindness." Not this again.

Ever since she found out that we opened for One Direction, she brings them up constantly. 'Did you see what Louis posted?' she'd ask. 'Can you ask Liam if he still has that beanie?' or 'How did you not know Harry worked at a bakery? You were best friends for two years!'

This bit is arguably my favorite recurring one that she does. It makes me laugh every time. She says it to the rest of the band sometimes, too. Instead of quoting the Bible as instruction to be kind, she quotes our 'former best friend' Harry.

Our conversation is interrupted when Matt bangs on the door to the dressing room.

"Five minute warning, Cal!"

Damn it. Already?

"Babe, I'm sorry, but it's almost time for soundcheck. Did you have anything else you wanted to talk about?"

"No, no, I'm good. I'm sorry for being snippy earlier. I'm glad we got to talk for a bit, even if it wasn't too long," she says.

"It's okay. You're allowed to get snippy," I assure her. "It's always great to hear your voice. Oh, and before I go, Ash and Luke say hi and Michael says hey."

She giggles. "Tell them I say howdy."

I laugh, shaking my head. Always has to be a little different. "Will do. Gonna let you go. I love you very much, and will text you when soundcheck is over?"

"Sounds good. I love you very much, too. Bye."

"Bye."

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#5sos #5 seconds of summer #luke hemmings #calum hood #ashton irwin #fanfiction #michael clifford #fanfic #5sosfam #5sos fanfic #calum #calum 5sos #calum fluff #calum angst #imagine #better left unsaid #tw cancer

[jungwnies]

partners ✰ 7 so, you did your research?

masterlist | next

after a long 3 hours you finally arrive with jake at somuuido. "it's beautiful, isn't it?" you say taking your phone out to take a picture of the scenery as jake did the exact same. "the fishing place isn't too far from here i don't think."

after about 10 minutes of walking the two of you have arrived at a fishing spot where the guide had been waiting for you guys, "welcome to somuuido, are you the girl who called us a few days ago about setting up some equipment?"

"how'd you know i love fishing?" jake asks as he casted his line into the water.

"all it took was a little search on twitter, it's almost as if you make being australian and a fisher your personality." you laugh casting your line in as well.

jake rolls his eyes, "what's wrong with a little aussie spirit?"

"it gets annoying when you're informing everyone every second that you're from australia and how blue the fish filled oceans are." you tell him reeling back in your line with no fish on the other end.

"you shouldn't reel your line in immediately after casting it by the way." jake says as his line stays out.

you roll your eyes, "then what, am i supposed to stand here for hours and wait for a fish to bite?"

jake laughs and reels his line in, "you should cast it, reel it in every 30 seconds to make it seem like there is live bait in the water, and then that's when the fish will bite." jake demonstrates, "like this."

you copy what he did and look at him. "is this right?"

"your casting skills could use a little improvement, but you're getting there." he tells you.

ten minutes later jake was shouting, "i got a fish! i think i got a fish!" he says reeling in his line that now had a little tension due to whatever was on the other end. eventually he wins the quick tug of war just to find out he had caught a branch. "nevermind." he says defeated.

you laugh and shake your head, "nice job, idiot."

you feel a tug in your line, "wait, i think i actually have a fish!" you exclaim, reeling it in. it was also a small fight to reel it in, except you actually did catch a fish. "this is the first time i've gone fishing, and i'm already doing better than you."

"bro, you actually just caught a fish! a crucian carp!" jake says excitedly as he helps you take the fish off the hook. "i think you should take a picture with the first fish you've ever caught."

you nod and hand him your phone from your back pocket. you hold the fish by the mouth and show it to the camera smiling. jake takes the picture and hands you back your phone after you released the fish back into the ocean.

the two of you continued fishing in peace, although there was playful banter here and there, it was the calmest interaction you've shared with each other.

the sun is starting to set, "it's beautiful here, i think i want to take ni-ki here one day maybe." jake says as the two of you pack up the fishing equipment to take it back to the store.

you nod and walk back to the building with jake behind you.

"thank you guys for coming today, you two make a beautiful couple." the older man says as he collects the borrowed equipment.

"oh we're not dating." the two of you say at the same time.

"my mistake, please forgive me." the man says, smiling.

you laugh, "it's alright, thank you again for letting us borrow the fishing stuff today."

"yes, yes, feel free to come back any time. it gets lonely here sometimes." the man says waving at the two of you guys as you two walk away.

"what time is it?" you ask jake as the two of you make  your way back to the train station.

"oh it's already 8pm." jake says shocked as he checked his watch. "we haven't even eaten dinner yet."

"when we get back to seoul it'll be a little before 12am." you tell him. "since we're already here, why don't we get something to eat?"

jake nods, "that sounds good, i think i saw this really nice place a little bit back." jake says, turning around.

"you're paying." you tell as you follow him back to the restaurant he spotted a while back.

"it was your idea to come here, i think you should pay." jake tells you as he holds the door open to the restaurant.

you roll your eyes, "after what you said to me last week, i think you should be the one to make up for it with dinner."

"y/n about that, i really want to-" jake begins to say until the older lady interrupts him.

"welcome to cafe joeunnal (섬카페좋은날 in somuuido)." the older lady says smiling at the two of you. "table for two?"

word count: 846 | thanks for reading!

taglist: @whois-alexis , @hanienie , @reikofruitloops , @baldi-2 , @yelleloww , @aetzensvct , @moonshoon , @kimipxl , @shinsou-rii , @giraffeass , @ghostiiess , @ohbeomgyu , @tlnyjoong , @silcry , @beomgyusonlywife , @xiaoderrrr [open - bolded could not be tagged]

2022 © jungwnies

#enhypenwriters #enhypen imagines #enhypen smau #enhypen au #enhypen x reader #enhypen scenarios #enhypen fluff #enhypen angst #jake imagines #jake smau #jake au #jake scenarios #jake fluff #jake x reader #jake angst #jaeyun scenarios #jaeyun imagines #jaeyun smau #jaeyun au #jaeyun fluff #jaeyun angst #jaeyun x reader #jungwnies #𐐪♡︎₊˚ ― jungwnies #jungwnies ; partners (sim jaeyun)

[nyamadermont]

Year in review (eventually)

Thanks go out to @itsmoonpeaches for suggesting I give this a shot.

1. Number of stories posted to Ao3: 14, total, all LOK-based.

2. Word count in 2022: 96,206

3. Fandoms I wrote for: Avatar: The Legend of Korra

4. Pairings: Lin Beifong/Kya II (3); Lin Beifong/Reader (1); Lin Beifong/Pema/Tenzin (9); Other (1 - shorts with various pairs, if any)

5. Stories with the most:

Kudos: Lin’s Interview, part 4 of Give Us Your Hand (Pemlinzin)

Bookmarks: Two Pairs of Eyes, (Kyalin)

Comment threads:  Elemental Changes, Lin Beifong-centric multi-chapter

Word count: Elemental Changes 

6. Work I’m most proud of (and why):  I’m sure it’s cheating, but I have 3 answers. 

1: Elemental Changes: This started with an image in my mind, and I wrote the whole thing before I published any of it. And the art I commissioned from @slowdissolve kickstarted a whole new experience for us both.

2: The In-Between Years: I managed to take all 30 prompts from Angstpril 2022 and string them into a mostly coherent story, writing no more than 1000 words at a time. Not every day is a gem, but I am happy with the progress of the story from high angst to an amicable resolution.

3. Give Us Your Hand: What started as a 507-word @flashfictionfridayofficial prompt blossomed into a 46K-word, 9-part series (so far).

7.   Work I’m least proud of (and why): This is ‘least’ proud in a set of stories I’m really pretty happy with. I’m going to throw Now Is Not the Time under the bus, because in retrospect, it’s kind of a rewrite of I’m Sorry I Need You.

8.   Share or describe a favorite review you received: This isn’t quite what the question asks, but having @slowdissolve say she would have done my commission for free was right up there in the highlight reel. And those three little hearts from @mjsharizai are always an absolute treat.

9.   A time when writing was really, really hard: I’m still very new on the writing wagon, having just started writing for a hobby in early 2021. Thankfully, I’m old enough that when it’s hard, I just set it aside and come back when the ideas are ready.

10. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: I just can’t answer the questions the right way tonight. Here, I’m going with the whole Pemlinzin ship. How little goody-goody two-shoes me wound up writing polyamory is something I should think through at some point in my life.

11. A favorite excerpt of your writing:  

This feels very odd to describe as a favorite. It engendered my first negative review which was so mean-spirited that it was, in its own way, the fire that helped me write the next seven entries in the series. From Mistakes (Give Us Your Hand, part 2):

[Tenzin] sighed. “About a week before he died, she came to visit. She was being Toph, trying to pretend it wasn’t that bad, that he wasn’t dying. Mom left them alone to talk and went to lay down for a little while.”

He shivered. “I wasn’t with them. I just heard Mom shouting. When I got to Dad’s room, Mom was healing him, and Toph was crying. She had punched him like always. But this time, her punch knocked him into the wall and he hit his head. It wasn’t terrible, Mom got him comfortable, but Toph didn’t come back after that. I know she and Mom saw each other at the memorial, and I know they basically made up. But then I hurt you.”

He squeezed Lin closer.

“They were best friends for over forty years. But one argument broke their relationship.”

12. How did you grow as a writer this year: This is a question I think will be easier to answer in retrospect. I was able to complete a couple of larger projects, even after I got so far into them that I kinda didn’t know what to do. I’m just so new at this I mostly can only see my weaknesses.

13. How do you hope to grow next year: Differentiating speaking styles and speech patterns between characters is a sore spot for me re-reading my own writing. I also know I’m not great at describing the interiority of characters. And starting fewer sentences with ‘and,’ ‘so,’ or an adverbial phrase {not an English major, I forget what the technical term is}.

14. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc):

I think that should be obvious by now. I owe @slowdissolvee a lot of credit.

15. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: 

I’ve been married for 25 years and have 2 kids. There’s a lot of blood, sweat, tears, and memory in what I write.

16. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: 

Be where you are. Sure, your readers are interested in seeing your updates, but your life comes first. #YourAudienceAwaits - and the patient ones are worth listening to. 

I’m going to offer a slightly different perspective than @itsmoonpeachessmoonpeaches, who was so kind as to suggest I take on this exercise. All while not disagreeing with her here:

Don’t be afraid to break out of your comfort zone. You will never grow as a writer if you continue to write the same things over and over again. If you have an idea for something very different, go for it! It takes a lot of effort and time to do something you don’t normally do, but you will end up being better after it.

I know I’ve already written the same story at least twice (see above), but it served me to write both of those stories. I clearly had some thinking to do on the topic.

17. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: I cannot put into words how much fun I’m having on Red Jade. Between working with Slowdissolve and getting to read the other Linzolt writers’ stories, I have been grinning for months.

18. Tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read:

All in fun, friends. If it’s not fun, leave it be: @slowdissolve @orangepanic @master-sass-blast @pamplemousseparadox @superliz6 @chaoticnerdsstuff @wishingforatypewriter

And anyone else who wants to!

#year in review #who let me do this #more fun than I know what to do with #slowdissolve's art #nyama's short fics #nyama's longer stories

[misspeculiar-principe]

August 14

1:23:47 jh

2:22:14 i dropped two out of 7 boxes of my brother's tea collection the rose oolong tea gave mom and twinings green tea. WHY AM I CLUMSY TODAY?

8:57:53 jwu from a dream that i already forgot; phone died 0% depleted and i happened to see 8:55am after turning it on; i probably woke up at around 8:54am or 8:53am idk

9:24:30 cricket sound left ear

9:37:07 jh to see 9:36am after viewing an elmo reel on my dumpitrealgood account's explorer page; although i initially did see 9:30am because of a npise (sis went out? Or from sis's bathroom? I forgot 🤷🏻‍♀️)

9:47:33 jh to see the time after reading the obama comment; WTF

9:57:26 because i was supposed to make a post and say i'm 29 in 2023 and will be 30 in 2024; i want a husband and a baby 😭

10:02:33 initially jh to see 10:02:32

10:17:47 accidentally swiped right instead of down in my likes

11:09:38 jh to see the time after the song changed to enemy from Yet Not I but Through Christ in Me

11:36:59 jh after doing personal chores (releasing spade and making his soup); jgbimr and unplugged my other phone bec i will multitask while peeing

12:21:15 felt like crampish pain on my right leg at 12:20pm

12:23:13 why did my music stop after i said "I Need You, God" at 1:00 timestamp; DID SOMEONE HACK MY SPOTIFY

12:27:11 jh to see 12:34pm on my old phone when inwas about to press back

12:28:58 because of typo on previous post; was supposed to type "back" not "pack" dont know how that happened

4:20:14 i happened to see a sperm and a snack shapes at the bottom of my yeti

43840 forgot to like it

50214 jf pooping; got out of the bathroom

5:34:48 because i heard "rust" from set for life after i touched the rusty comb of my dog, coincidence? Listening to my pedro playlist

65622 without a light; because i heard witjour a light and "sign" when i was about to head to the kirchen and i happened to see McDonald's sign mear our house

7:33:59 because i happened to hear arms from from steady steady

9:10:08 jh when i was about to send a message

9:11:55 because i happened to see 110 bookmarks on a tweet

9:46:17 "look up to the sky" after i looked up to the sky, heard the lyrics and then let it light up your pathway after i pointed my other phone to my pathway because i just turned off the lights on the rooftop court; wow, coincidemce syncs

Wasnt able to take screenshots but little nebula played whenni heard "galaxy" and then teach me

9:57:33 jh to see 10:04pm literally changed in a split second; i wasnt able to unlock my phone due to wet hands; i just finished washing my feet with soap and water when i realized to check for the time because of the song and when i was about to do so it accidentalky got unpkugged

1007 and thats all it is

1035 jgbimr after washing hands and preparing food etc ready to bathe

10:56:53 weird menstrual blood; was about to start bathing; went out of bathroom dripping

11:05:35 jh to see the time after seeing my menstrual blood became straught ftom horizontal to veryical; while wetting my body

11:14: was aware but didn't expect to catch the time; the reasong why is because i thought i already drained it to the drain and was surprise its stuck and i moved it with my slippers it formed a j like shape; origunal song playing was every victory i accidnetally jist swiped left panicked and annoyed by notifs

[slothbearsstuff]

social media detox

Contrary to my heading, I am really putting up this on a social media, but one in which I'm the least active.

So I deactivated Instagram few days back. You know I always wanted to do it because at one point I felt like it was eating up my brain; but for some reason I still continued to scroll all day everyday. My screentime was over 7 HOURS!! 7 hours out of 14 hours of my conscious time. That's about half the time and I spend larking and wasting the rest of the time in some way too with least productivity. I joined Instagram in 2018 and reels came into it in about 2019. You know what it did to our brains. From watching 30 min YouTube videos after 4 years I could barely concentrate on a 1 min reel. That was alarming too.

The primary thought that kept me from deactivating Instagram was the fear of missing out. The fear that I'll be left out when all others were in it. But one fine day I just did it and you know what happened, I didn't give a f*ck. I didn't even care about it as much as I thought it would. It wasn't hard. But when I was going for a rest the first thing I did was take up my phone which I still do now. But I downloaded YouTube instead. Thanks to the s*itty algorithm of YouTube they play the same video so many times that it'll force us to keep our phone away.

Everyday after my morning classes till 12, I rest for a while till 3. That's about 3 hours. I usually spend 2.5 hours out of this on my phone and took a nap for less than 30 minutes and wake up all grumpy and moody. I wasn't actually resting my body was not my mind. This afternoon I thought of a change. I took the book I was reading (Currently "Little Women") and read 2 chapters out of it and thought of taking a nap. Guess what it did to me. I woke up fresher than ever and was satisfied with my nap. I even felt like there was so much time left for me.

so yeah, I just wanted to pour it all out cuz this s*it have been killing our brains for a really long time now.

#social media detox #instagram #life #explore

[alfonzone]

Here’s a long ask you might have to think about but I’m bored and interested in your answers too so what the heck! 😂

What are your top 5 countries you’d love to visit and top 5 cities in those countries ?

Top 5 songs that you listen to when you’re sad?

Top 5 movies?

Do you have a top 5 actors or actresses who you love and same goes for bands/ artists? :)

ANON, MY GOODNESS —

first off, I only think I can give 1-3 max cities for each country so I hope that's okay with you!!!

Top 5 countries I'd love to visit and will visit at least two or three in my lifetime:

1. Germany!!

Cities:

Möttingen, Germany - why? Because of 'The Romantic Road'!! Obviously driving can be a nuisance and take a toll on you BUT it seems like a nice 3 - 4 day vacation? here's a link that I read and saved a while back. It's not a must for me but something to think about.

Erfurt, Germany — why? Unlike the rest of the countries and cities, it will be because one of my friends live there and it's better or at least it seems wiser to visit my friend and spend time with them as they show me around and I experience their culture, the location, etc!!

2. Scotland!!

1. Edinburgh, Scotland - it's obvious because it's a popular or seems like a popular tourist attraction and I really want to walk those stairs I keep seeing in Instagram reels!! Aghh

Another reason would be because my mom is a HUGE Outlander fan and she stated that she would love to visit that place sometime so I'm like !!!!!! YES. I want her walking around Loch Ness, Old Course, and anywhere near the vicinity of Edinburgh. Have her enjoy a different scenery for once.

3. France!!

I actually tried learning French 5 years ago and that's pretty much why haha. I know that France, well I don't know, but I have been paying a little attention that there seems to be a revolution or disagreement with their laws or government and I don't know where it would be a good place to visit just to experience a life in France (I don't want the fake experience) but if someone can help me with that and just help me find a place where I can walk around, shop groceries, park walks, thrift shopping, and etc then I'd greatly appreciate it!!

4. Canada

British Columbia is just above Washington State and I've been looking around there and it's not necessarily that I would like to travel there for a week or so but more so give it a day or two of walking around there and then heading back to Washington. I guess it's more for me to say that I've "been" to Canada 😆

5. Japan/South Korea

I have no particular reason as to why, HOWEVER, if I can visit any of these two places then I will — I'd like to learn about their culture, the things they teach in terms of manners or beliefs, way of living, etc.

—

Top 5 songs I listen to when I'm sad:

Chances Are • Bob Marley and The Wailers

Leave a Light On - Acoustic • Tom Walker

My Tears Ricochet • Taylor Swift

Call Your Mom • Noah Kahan

Mercury • Sleeping At Last

* by the way, it's not me intentionally listening to sad music but moreso the music I like to help me feel better ARE sad music. I'll honestly listen to anything really when I'm sad. The point or more important question is AM I WALKING, PLAYING BASKETBALL, OR JOGGING while listening to music?!

—

Top 5 movies:

Oooooh, I recently got introduced to my new all time favorite so I'm glad I can share it here!! I can boast and ramble about each one listed but the message of this is YOU GOTTA WATCH IT SOMETIME IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY!!

1. Notting Hill

2. While You Were Sleeping

3. Pizza My Heart

4. The Family Man

5. One Fine Day

6. 13 Going on 30

7. The Incredible Hulk

—

Top 5 actors/actresses and bands/artists!?

Artists/bands

Taylor Swift

Noah Kahan

Harry Styles

Sleeping At Last

Twenty One Pilots

Bastille

—

Top 5 actors/actresses:

Hmm, this is a little bit more complicated because I've haven't watched much lately and only rewatch mostly — all I can give you is actors I've enjoyed watching on more than one films!!

George Clooney

Ben Stiller

Jennifer Lawrence

Michelle Pfeiffer

Mel Gibson

Nicolas Cage

—

*catching my breath* THANKS FOR THE ASKS, ANON. I hope I made sense!!

#asks #personal

[gettingreadyfortour]

Phish songs I am chasing, if you call it that. Just really excited to get MY Phish debut!

Some of these are head scratching because of the amount of times they have been played, but will you might not know I took an unplanned, unwanted hiatus from seeing Phish perform live from 12/30/19–7/19/22. Yes, some of these songs have yet to be performed live by Phish or Trey Anastasio. I’m just putting it out there.

what are you “chasing“? That’s been an uncomfortable term with me for the past 30 years because I’m happy with whatever I get. Everything else is just jimmies on top!

📸 by Stacy Benstock Klein

🎵 2001 by Phish 12/31/22, lights by CK5 at @thegarden

#welcometomyphishylife #phish #musicformysoul #phishtok #fyp #foryou #foryoupage #reels

[kuroos-babie]

random thought but like,,,, fireman!daichi

#my head is reeling at 7:30 am #i want fireman!daichi #chiqui chats

[belovasangel]

Come Back to Me

Summary: Shawn missing big events leaves to beautiful memories and Christmas miracles

Pairing: Shawn x fem!Nurse!Reader

Warnings: swearing, light angst, fluff, flashback heavy, holiday feelings 

A/N: Yup. Surprise. Also flashbacks are in italics, per usual. Also I am not Canadian so I don’t know if y’all celebrate Remembrance Day. For the sake of this story, pretend that it’s the equivalent to Thanksgiving.

Shawn took your hand as you barreled down the sidewalk, laughs flying past you in the wind. Tonight had been a perfect date, something great to wrap the summer up, full of time alone with your favorite guy (and your favorite wine). He had been planning this for weeks now, and you can even remember him talking about this back in June when his tour had been announced. The pandemic put a damper on your two’s plans since March, but once the numbers started decreasing did he get calls from managers, and then... there was another world tour. You weren’t mad, music was his passion. Even though you two would be wrapped in each other’s arms after a lovely night, you could tell behind his eyes he longed to play the guitar for different cities. 

That’s why tonight was so important, because he started packing and planning, then he would leave on Wednesday for Prague. And of course, your job needed you in Toronto. While Canada hasn’t experienced any significantly alarming numbers, there were still cases rolling in. You insisted that Shawn goes on tour, so much that you had to pay for his first ticket yourself (he payed you back, though. He insisted). 

Shawn skidded to a stop, turning around and putting his hands on your shoulders. “Now promise me you’re gonna close your eyes, just for a few seconds.”

You huffed and shrugged your shoulders, “Shawn I’m out of breathe, you made me run in heels for about half a mile... Give me 5 minutes instead.” With a quick chuckle, he pecked your lips and turned you around. You heard his shuffling from those black boots he wears to rubble, then decided to look around. He somehow managed to find a quaint park, with a nice bubbling fountain and family’s scattered around. Dogs were running a lit in the distance, and the bustle of the city wasn’t nearly as booming as it usually is. This was nice.

“Okay, turn around.”

With a giggle, you turned around to see Shawn on one knee. Behind him was a tree strung with lights that were glowing, and underneath the tree was champagne and a radio playing your two’s song, Turning the Page (Yeah, we know it’s from Twilight, but that doesn’t stop it from being any less romantic). He was kneeled on a red and white picnic blanket, the typical one you’d see in catalogues for fall. On the blanket were rose petals scattered. 

“(Y/N) (Y/L/N), you have changed my life for the better. The moment you saw me in the E.R., and had to take care of my broken hand, I knew you were just as kind and gentle as you looked. Once you let me in, and take you on that shitty first date, I got to see the real you. The you that cries during every Disney movie, the you that would bring me breakfast in bed when I had a rough day, the you that would rescue a damn pigeon off the street because it looked sad. You are the most sincere, selfless, and intelligent woman I have ever had the pleasure of knowing, and I don’t want ever want to stop or slow down. You have become my life and my rock, I’m completely lost without you. I am utterly in love with you, (Y/N). I want us to have a family, I want to make an album for you, and everything in between. Will you please marry me?”

You shuddered awake, looking quickly at your blaring alarm from the end table. Picking it up and turning it off, the time read 4:25 A.M., signaling it was time to get ready for work. You got up, and went to open the blinds to your bedroom, watching the snow fall steadily. Slipping on your socks and bathrobe, you shuffled to the kitchen to get a cup of tea brewing before you hit the shower. 

Mornings like this weren’t incredibly tough anymore, once Shawn was gone on tour. He face-timed you once a week because of tour, sent you letters and packages from your favorite cities, and even had roses delivered on your birthday. And of course, he always said, “Lemme see it. I wanna see you wear that pretty ring. There it is, there she is, soon-to-be Mrs. Mendes.”

Slipping in the hot shower, you played some of his songs, some of your regular playlists, and when you were throwing on your outfit, your two’s song. You missed Shawn. He had missed your two’s favorite holiday, Halloween, where you two always did the cheesy couple costumes. He missed your birthday, but he sent his family in place. He missed Remembrance Day, because in Europe that wasn’t a thing. And tomorrow is Christmas, where he has no sign of coming home whatsoever. That’s fine, though, because you took the long shift at the hospital.

When the song came to an end, you threw on your coat and snow boots, grabbing all the food and equipment you would need for a 12-hour and began to head out. Shawn sent you his daily vlog and you watched that on the shuttle. Once that was over, you got to the hospital where you would forget about your slightly more aching heart. After work, the routine would basically go in reverse. Commute home, get back into your pajama’s, drink some tea, get dinner, and go to bed, where you would have a restless night in an empty bed.

“When do you think we should have the wedding?”

Shawn looked over, a piece of popcorn hanging onto his lip like a lifeline. His cheeks were flushed and he still looked a little sweaty from the show he just played at TD Garden. He knew you were doing the planning to keep yourself from descending into madness (well, not entirely, but you only brought it up when you really missed him). “I think we should do a summer/fall sort of wedding, like when the leaves are red but it isn’t freezing by 5, ya know?”

You hummed in agreement, a smile picking at the corners of your mouth. “I completely agree. Do you want it to be outdoors then, because of the leaves?”

Shawn took another few things of popcorn from the bag and popped them into his swollen lips, he always licked them when he was frustrated by how a show went, or just when his mind was reeling. “I think we should get married outdoors, and then have the reception indoors. Kind of like-”

“Twilight...”

You both looked at the screen and snorted, sending both of you into fits of hysteria. “Shawn, we really base our relationship off of those books, didn’t we?” He looked over, licking his lips once again. “Explain, babe. I get a little bit, but our whole relationship?”

You shuffled in the bed a little bit, “Hear me out, Shawn-y boy. We met when you were hurt and I had to save you, or more-so your career. Edward saved Bella from the car, right? Right. So, there’s that. Then that girl who you worked on the album with tried to get you on the few dates, but that was long after we were official. Boom, Jacob plot line. Then you leave me for your first tour, which I get 100%, so don’t be upset over that. But the girl you worked with saw you kind of sad and made it her mission to befriend you and then attempt to change your mind over me... And our song is the one from their wedding, and we want an outdoors-y wedding.....”

Shawn looked at the screen, then back to the popcorn leaking butter in his hands. “Damn. So you’re saying that I’m Bella?” You began to shake your head, cheeks turning red. “Maybe I meant that wrong, but-”

“No, no you’re saying I’m Bella. Does that mean I get to wear the dress? I cannot wait to get married with no emotions and then have the ugliest CGI baby in the history of cinematics. Aren’t you so excited for that, my love?”

“Absolutely thrilled.”

The alarm on your phone blared once again, pulling you from Shawn. You picked up the phone, getting a few “Merry Christmas” texts from family and friends. You assumed Shawn was out partying with his crew mates, plus it must’ve been a busy day altogether. Turning off the alarm and standing, you pulled on the slippers and followed your routine again. 

Once it got to 6:07, and still no text from Shawn, you decided to call him. Immediately, you were sent to voicemail. With a sigh, you waited for voicemail.

“Hey bubs, Merry Christmas! I miss you more than ever, it’s snowing here pretty rough. I know you’d probably go outside right about now and insist to make a snowman or some angels, so that might be a mission for me after work. Um, I wanted to let you know that I love you so much, and I hope you’re having fun on tour... The apartment isn’t the same without you here, especially around this time. You’re probably having fun with your friends and I don’t wanna intrude on that, so I’ll hang up. I love you Shawn, be careful. Stay safe, come back to me soon. Bye.”

Wiping the tear that fell down your cheek, you stepped outside your apartment, hopped into the elevator and began the commute to your shift. You got to work on record time, beginning your patient rounds and vitals, then celebrating with the coworkers. Working 6:30 AM-9:30 PM would be a tough one, but whatever to keep you under that roof. Plus, double-time because of the holiday.

Once it hit 9:30, you booked it out of the hospital and onto the shuttle. Your eyes were barely open as you saw the texts from Shawn.

(Shawn) 7:59 AM: Hey babe, I’m so sorry I didn’t answer your call! I can’t wait to see your face tonight, you still up for FaceTime?

(Shawn) 9:26 AM: I bet you’re busy, but I’m gonna be in a few conferences and doing press so I won’t be able to talk for a while. Love you!

(Shawn) 3:14 PM: (Y/N) I don’t think we can FaceTime tonight, I have to do something for a fan and it’s really important. I am so sorry.

(Shawn) 8:44 PM: Are you mad at me or are you still working?

(Shawn) 9:32 PM: Something is waiting for you at home, it’s your gift. I hope this can make up for the call!

You hopped out of the shuttle, heart feeling extra heavy as you walked into the apartment. The string lights and streamers along the walls were taunting you as the elevator brought you to your floor, and you tried to compose yourself until you would get inside. Stepping up to your door, you looked for the present, to no avail.

(Y/N) 9:45 PM: Shawn I don’t see a package

(Shawn) 9:45 PM: Mom must’ve brought it inside, I’m sure it’s there.

With a huff, you shoved the key into the door, and walked inside. Chucking your purse and coat onto the hooks, while flinging off your shoes, you composed yourself enough to look for the package. If he got it express-shipped it had to be good. Checking the kitchen was no luck, and the living room looked normal. 

(Shawn) 9:48 PM: Bedroom, babe

With a gasp, you quickly buzzed to the bedroom, and laid your hand on the door. You stopped, hesitant to what was behind the door. What if it isn’t him? Taking a deep breath, you dismissed the negative thought and opened.

The room was filled with lit tea lights, rose petals on the bed and the floor, and Shawn. He was standing there in that chunky-white knit sweater you loved, with flushed cheeks and watery eyes, holding a bouquet of flowers, and your favorite song playing softly in the background.

You gasped, running into his arms with a squeal and sob, him mimicking the sound. He held onto the small of your back, and one hand on the back of your neck, and you felt his tears falling onto your skin. “I missed you so much, (Y/N). You don’t even know.” He pulled back slightly pressing his lips to yours in a soft embrace.

After a minute of kissing, you pulled back. “Merry Christmas, Shawn.”

“Merry Christmas, (Y/N).”

#shawn #shawn mendes #shawn mendes imagines #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes x reader #shawn mendes x you #shawn mendes fic #shawn mendes fanfiction #imagine #love #christmas #lumineshawn

[jaehyunhour]

for the first time... | lee jeno

summary: a collection of firsts with lee jeno.

warnings: slightly suggestive at one point, but it’s mostly just cavity-inducing sweetness.

2.6k words. (a/n: i’m considering writing these for other members, so if you want to see it please send me an ask!)

the first time jeno… kisses you.

it’s no secret to anyone that around you that jeno has a massive crush on you. you’re the most beautiful person he’s ever seen, he loves the way your eyes scrunch up whenever he tells a bad joke, the way you stand on your tippy toes to reach your hand up and ruffle his hair, the way you fight with jaemin for his attention, and so much more. quite simply, jeno is obsessed with you and isn’t afraid to show you. when the dreamies invite you over to celebrate the end of their promotions and decide to play a half-drunken game of truth or dare, he holds you close and says the blush on his cheeks is due to the alcohol (but everyone knows it’s because of you).

“y/n, truth or dare?” chenle asks, wiggling his eyebrows at you.

“hmm, truth,” you respond, leaning your head on jeno’s shoulder.

“do you have a crush on jeno hyung?”

“dare.”

“kiss jeno hyung.”

jeno quickly sits up and turns his head to look at you. you pull yourself up and off of him and stare him in the eyes. he’s blushing more and now you know it can’t be the alcohol. you give him a smile and get closer to him.

“only if jeno wants to,” you say.

jeno is at a loss for words, and opts for nodding his head furiously instead of speaking. so you lean in, press a kiss on his lips that he returns, and memorize the feeling of his lips on yours.

“no fair! i want to get kissed too!” jaemin objects. you can feel jeno smile into the kiss and you smile, too.

the first time jeno… takes you out on a date.

although you thought kissing jeno was enough to let him know that you also had a crush on him, it was not enough for him. he thought about that half-drunken kiss for two weeks before bringing it up to you again, trying to casually slip it into conversation when you were out picking up food for the rest of the dreamies.

“do you regret kissing me?” jeno asks.

you shake your head no. “absolutely not, you’re the best kisser i’ve ever met.”

“how many people have you kissed?”

“a couple,” you say, staring at the menu of the chicken place. “did jaemin tell you what they want?”

“not yet… would you ever want to go on a date with me, y/n?”

you shake your head yes. “i thought that was obvious.”

“wait— are you serious?”

“yep, as serious as can be. should we go on one now?”

jeno tears his eyes away from the menu to look at you with wide eyes. “what about food for the boys?”

“we can order it and have them deliver it, and then we can go somewhere else and sit down and eat. or get ice cream, or go to the han river… whatever you want.”

“i’ll do whatever as long as it’s with you,” jeno says, ruffling the hair atop your head.

“that’s cheesy.”

“you love it,” he says.

“you got me there.”

and then, jeno took you to do everything you suggested. he took you to one of his favorite sit-down restaurants to eat, treated you to ice cream, and took you to watch the sunset at the han river.

the first time jeno… says i love you.

you’re sitting next to a sleeping jeno, your laptop resting on your thighs and back pressed against the headboard of his bed. you have a paper due by noon, and you want to finish it and sleep in instead of having to wake up early to finish it, and jeno has fallen asleep waiting for you to finish your essay. the soft music you played and the sound of your fingers hitting the keys on your keyboard quickly lulled him to sleep. days after your first date, jeno asked you if you wanted to be his girlfriend and you said yes. and now, four months later, you’re enjoying yet another sleepover with jeno.

you were so close to finishing your essay, only a page and a half left and your works cited page and you were done. it was almost 4 in the morning, and a frustrated groan you let out forced jeno to stir in his sleep.

“baby?” jeno asks, eyes still closed and voice muffled by the pillow.

“ah, i’m sorry love, did i wake you?” you ask, moving one of your hands to play with his hair. he lets out a content sigh.

“it’s okay, you should sleep,” he responds.

“i’m almost done, don’t worry.”

jeno shifts his body closer to you, puts one of his arms over your stomach, and presses a kiss to your arm.

“go back to sleep, love,” you say softly, returning to your paper.

“i love you,” he mumbles.

you stop your typing and a smile breaks out on your face. as you bask in the warm feeling in your entire body at his sleepy confession, you hear quiet snores coming from jeno.

“i love you too, baby,” you say and return to finishing your paper.

the first time jeno… makes love to you.

your paper takes longer to finish than you thought it would, and when you turn it in at 7:30 in the morning you’re no longer tired and don’t know what to do. still reeling from the feeling of jeno confessing his love to you, you set your laptop down on your bedside table and straddle jeno’s hips. you and jeno have been intimate in other ways, just never crossing the line and having actual sex. not that you guys weren’t ready, you were ready for jeno whenever and he was ready for you whenever, but jeno wanted to make sure everything was perfect for you.

you ground your hips slightly into his, soaking in the feeling of the friction, and leaning down to press kisses all over his face and neck. jeno doesn’t react, and you think of how to wake him up, but when you press a kiss to his lips he returns it and you know he’s been awake the whole time.

“you’re up!” you say excitedly.

“baby, it’s so early, why are you up?” jeno’s hands come up to rest at your hips. you grind down again and he groans, hardening underneath you as you speak.

“i haven’t slept yet, i’m not tired.”

“aw, poor baby. did you finish your essay?”

you shake your head yes.

“how was it?”

“it was okay… do you remember what you said to me when you woke up in the middle of the night?”

he thinks for a second, but comes up empty. so you lean down, pressing a firm kiss to his lips.

“i love you,” you say.

“really?”

you shake your head and kiss him again.

“you said it first, though, when you woke up in the middle of the night.”

“what? really?” he asks.

“yup, you told me to finish my essay then told me you love me, and then knocked out again.”

“man, that sucks, i don’t even remember! but it’s true, i do love you.”

“and i love you,” you respond. jeno flips you over and presses you into the mattress firmly, grinding his hips up against yours.

“jeno, make love to me,” you say quietly.

“are you sure?”

you nod. “absolutely sure,”

and so jeno makes love to you, bringing you to cloud nine and back, and cleaning you up afterwards. he cuddles with you afterward, and you quickly fall asleep with your head on his chest. he presses a kiss to your forehead, wrapping his arms around you, and drifts back to sleep content with the morning’s events.

the first time jeno… argues with you.

“y/n, you’re not listening to me,” jeno says, frustrated. at times, you can be quite stubborn and get upset when things do not go your way, and this is one of those times. jeno has a comeback soon, and while normally you’re very understanding of his schedule and how busy he gets, this is one time where you aren’t so understanding. your one year anniversary is coming up, and to you, it feels like jeno isn’t putting in the effort to make time to celebrate with you.

“jeno, you’re not trying!” you respond, equally as frustrated.

he sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose. “y/n i am tired, my body hurts, i’m in the middle of preparing for a comeback, i can’t just drop everything for you.”

“i know that, jeno, but this is our anniversary! you really can’t find a couple of hours to celebrate with me? our anniversary, jeno!” you say, slightly raising your voice.

he looks up at you and frowns. “i’m not going to have this conversation with you if you’re going to raise your voice at me. you know that.”

“sorry,” you say sheepishly. “i’m just upset, but that’s no reason to raise my voice at you.”

“why are you so upset, baby? i’ve gotten busy before but you’ve never reacted like this. what’s going on?”

you sigh. “i just… i’ve never been able to celebrate an anniversary with someone, and i just want to make sure that we’ll be able to spend it together… i know we can celebrate every year but, it’s our first year, so it’s special to me.”

jeno takes a few steps forward and pulls you into his chest, wrapping his arms around you and playing with your hair. “ah, my sweet baby, you should have just said something. you don’t need to pick a fight with me to get me to hear you out, baby. just tell me how you’re feeling from the beginning so we can work it out, okay? i love you.”

you pull back to look up at him and pucker your lips. he leans down to give you a quick kiss.

“i love you, too.”

the first time jeno… buys you a present.

jeno bought you plenty of gifts before you were together, but he wanted to make sure the first gift he bought you as an official couple was a nice one. for weeks, he secretly asked you about things you liked and things you wanted, so he could put something together for your 100 days. but around the 90-day mark, jeno began to panic because he was a perfectionist and didn’t want to disappoint you. you kept flexing that your gift to him was incredible (and it was) and he was scared that he wouldn’t be able to match what you got for him. he had gotten you a pair of pajamas you wanted, some new skin care products you saw your favorite beauty youtuber review, but the gift he was most excited to get you was the couple bond touch bracelets. you didn’t spend a lot of time apart from each other, but when you did you missed each other greatly. it was the perfect gift. when he touched his bracelet, it would light up on yours. when you touch yours, it would light up on his.

and you, too, thought it was the perfect gift. on your 100 days, when you opened everything and saw the bracelets, you began to tear up. for a split second jeno was afraid that he had fucked up, but when you tackled him into a huge hug and began peppering kisses all over his face he knew that you were just happy.

“jeno, this is incredible, thank you so much,” you say, voice muffled by his neck.

“anything for you, my love.”

the first time jeno… goes away.

you were prepared well for the first time jeno had to leave to tour. it sounds silly, but he slowly had to ween you off of him so you would be okay once he left. it was difficult, but you were able to go all the way with him to the airport to send him off. once arrived at the airport, you pressed a long kiss on his lips in the van and sent him off.

“you’re going to do amazing, baby. i love you so much.” you say.

“i love you so much, i’ll let you know when we get to japan, okay?”

you nod quickly, leaning in for another kiss, and jeno gets out of the van.

at first, it’s difficult going back to an empty room when you are so used to sleeping with jeno every night he can sneak out of the dorms, but when you walk into your bedroom and see a stuffed animal wearing one of jeno’s shirts you smile. there’s a stack next to the stuffed animal with a few more of jeno’s shirts, and one of his hoodies, and in that moment, jeno texts you.

from: jeno ♡

“baby, did you get home and see what i left for you? hopefully that’ll hold you over until i come home. i love you, sweetheart.”

to: jeno ♡

“you are seriously the best boyfriend ever, i love you so much. call me when you land.”

and the first time jeno… introduces you to his family.

the first time jeno introduces you to his family is well before you two officially get together. you’d been friends for a few months, and when one of his aunts announces she’s getting married he immediately knows to bring you as his guest. it’s a beautiful ceremony, taking place on jeju island, and you’re surrounded by the entirety of jeno's extended family. he holds your hand to guide you through everyone, taking the time to introduce you to everyone one-by-one and dodging questions about the status of your relationship.

he didn’t know if he had feelings for you or not yet, but the way you interacted with his family had a blush creeping up on his cheeks and his whole body feel warm. he snuck a few shots of soju when no one was looking, hoping that the alcohol would give him some courage to possibly make a move on you. jeno watches as you talk to one of his uncles, taking his baby cousin out of his uncle’s arms and holding him in your own. you bounce him in your arms and make faces at him, sway to the sound of the music as you hold him close to you arms. his heart swells at the sight and he makes his way to you.

“can i steal you away for a second?” he asks, but he notices the baby has fallen asleep in your arms.

“i’m afraid i can’t let him go, he’s knocked out,” you respond.

“do you want to dance?” he asks, leading you to the dance floor.

you dance with him as best as you can while still holding the baby, jeno’s arms wrapped around your waist while one of your hands is placed on his shoulder, the other arm occupied with the baby.

as the song comes to an end, the happy couple announce that they’re going to toss the bouquet. you transfer the baby to jeno’s arms, and he only stirs quietly as you rush over to the group of women and try to get a good spot. they count down, three.. two.. one.. the bouquet goes flying and you catch it right in your hands. everyone cheers and you run back to jeno excitedly, pulling him into a hug as best as you can with the baby still in his arms.

“good job, bub,” he says to you, and you take the baby back from him. you hold both the baby and the bouquet in your arms, and in that moment jeno knows he doesn’t want anyone else but you.

#lee jeno #nct jeno #nct dream #nct smut #nct #jeno au #nct fluff #nct angst #nct scenarios #nct drabbles #kpop smut #kpop drabbles #kpop scenarios #nct imagines #nctzens

[thedumpsterqueen]

Standards of Performance, Chapter 7: Hangovers and Confrontations

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6

AO3 Link

I’ve been crazy busy this week, so this one is a bit short, I’m sorry! Thank you for your kind, complimentary, and h*rny thoughts in my messages this week. They truly keep me going. Big shoutout, also, to the few people that have messaged me angry about how long it’s taking Hotch and reader to get together - you had ample warning I was gonna drag this out ;) Final bit of business: there will be no chapter next Friday. I’m going to take the next two weeks to get ahead on writing so I’m not panicking when the content starts to get longer and more ~intense~. I’m sorry for that :( Thank you so much for your continued support, truly. You’re all amazing. Lastly - shoutout to @honeyshores for your advice on this one <3

Summary:  You’re the BAU’s newest intern, desperate to prove yourself amongst an established team of much more experienced profilers. Agent Hotchner, the seemingly infallible team leader, sets strict expectations for your performance. He commands your respect without even trying, but is there something more to your relationship than a simple desire to impress your stony-faced boss?

Chapter Summary: You try to determine whether it's the hangover or Hotch causing more of your headache. 

Words: 2320

Rating: Explicit, 18+. Warnings on AO3.

Pairings: Hotch x Reader, Hotch x You

Your phone’s ringtone blared into your ear, waking you up from a dreamless sleep. Opening it to check the notification, you groaned at the bright light emitting from the screen. Upon seeing it was a text from Hotch, all traces of unconsciousness dissipated, and you sat up in bed, head pounding.

Ok, so you were really fucking hungover.

After Hotch freaked out on you last night and you ditched Cooper, you’d made it your mission to have fun with the rest of the team, which involved you buying everyone many more drinks. It worked - you didn’t leave until 2 am - but you were about to pay the price, because Hotch apparently wanted everyone at the office in 30 minutes. You checked the time.

7:00 am.

If you didn’t know better, you would’ve thought he was doing this on purpose.

You showered and threw on a dress, praying the commute to the BAU would give the 3 ibuprofen currently digesting in your otherwise empty stomach time to work.

  It didn’t - in fact, it just provided ample time for the nausea to set in. But by the haggard looks everyone else was shooting as they settled into the meeting room, they seemed to be in the same boat. 

Garcia, wearing massive sunglasses and laying on the couch in the corner, spoke first. “I threw up in the shower this morning.”

Morgan raised his head out of his crossed arms on the table, probably about to make some quip about Garcia and showers, but seemed to think better of being upright and laid his head back down with a grunt. 

“I feel great,” Reid said with a smile, prompting groans out of everyone, including yourself.

“That’s because you had like, 3 drinks.” JJ said. “And 2 of them were beer.”

“It’s also because I drank an appropriate amount of water. Did you know if you consume 8 ounces of water with each alcoholic drink, you can reduce the incidence of hangovers by-”

“Kid,” Rossi interrupted, taking a break from gulping down a massive mug of coffee. “Know your audience.”

“Everyone here?” Hotch asked, walking in and flicking on the lights, which earned him a collective hiss from the rest of the team. His shock at the reaction quickly turned to faint amusement. “More importantly, is everyone capable of working today without throwing up in a trashcan?”

“I’ll do my best, Sir, but I make no promises,” said Garcia, who definitely looked the worst for wear.

“Well, good, because Internal Affairs requested the Use of Deadly Force reviews early this year.”

Another groan from everyone, with the exception of you, who had no idea what reports he was referring to. As if reading your mind, Hotch turned to you and explained, “Use of Deadly Force reviews are required reports we fill out annually in which we analyze and justify every situation where deadly force was used against a subject. I know you weren’t here for most of these, but you can still help type them up, and it’ll be helpful to go over the cases for your learning.”

You nodded, not thrilled to watch the team dredge up the worst moments of the past year, but thrilled that today’s task didn’t require you to move from your chair. Hotch slid a box of files onto the table, reminded you all that he’d be in his office if you needed anything, and took his leave.

“Doesn’t he have to go over these with us, seeing as…” you trailed off, unsure how to speculate that Hotch was probably the one to take the shot in at least half of these cases.

Morgan knew what you were trying to say. “He goes over them before we submit the reports to Internal Affairs.” He grabbed the top file from the box and grimaced. “The Toelle case, man, remember that one?”

Prentiss sighed and rubbed her temples. “Just when I thought I might get through the day without losing my breakfast.”

  ____________

  You pushed your laptop away and slouched back into your chair. “I need a break.”

It was a miracle you’d made it to this point, honestly - your headache was now raging despite pain relievers, and you’d spent half the day meticulously poring over the actions of some of the BAU’s most gruesome killers. (Prentiss was right - the Toelle file had been enough to make everyone, even Reid, turn a little green).

“You doing alright, kiddo?” Rossi asked, peering over the file he was reading.

“Just hungover. Went a little harder than I expected to, ya know?”

“What happened with Hotch last night?” Reid asked.

“Reid!” JJ admonished. 

Morgan shrugged. “Hey, we’re all thinking it. We saw him drag you outside, then he stormed back in and left. How’d you manage to piss him off so bad?”

“I’m surprised you noticed anything. You were pretty occupied,” Rossi said, raising his eyebrows towards Garcia, who flushed scarlet. 

You laughed and sent a silent thank you to Rossi for taking the heat off of you. 

“He just told me the guy I was dancing with was on coke and that I shouldn’t hang out with him.” You shrugged. “It was weird and I kinda freaked out on him at first, but I guess he was right.”

That didn’t get the nonchalant response you expected - everyone looked just as confused as you were when Hotch had initially approached you.

“Wait, hold on,” Prentiss said, sitting forward. “He told you not to dance with that guy because he was on drugs?”

“Yeah,” you replied, “He said after Garcia got attacked by that one man, everyone on the team needs to be more careful about who they associate with. Is that not… the case…?”

You trailed off, because judging by the looks the rest of the team were exchanging, it definitely wasn’t .

JJ shook her head. “Hotch has never really cared what we do in our private lives unless it affects our job.”

“Yeah, like remember that time you dated Will for a year without telling us and we had to pretend we didn’t know?” Prentiss asked, grinning.

“Or that time you hooked up with the mail guy and you made us sign for your packages for the next month?” Morgan ribbed back at Prentiss.

“I was drunk -”

“I think you should talk to Aaron,” Rossi suggested gently over what was quickly becoming a team debate over who had the craziest love life.

Still reeling over the knowledge that Hotch’s erratic behavior towards you wasn’t merely some standard attempt to keep the team safe, you nodded and stood.

It was time for some answers, god damn it.

  The righteous indignation that spurred you towards Hotch’s office was quickly being replaced by nervousness as you neared. You considered turning back, but you were sure he heard you stomping down the hall, and you weren’t trying to make a habit of awkwardly hesitating outside like you had at his apartment. Despite his door being ajar, you knocked gently, and he looked up from his standard mound of paperwork and nodded. 

“Come in.”

You obliged and sat down across the desk from him, twiddling your fingers. He waited for you to speak, never one to opt out of awkward silence.

“I think we should talk about what happened last night. Sir.”

He cocked his head slightly, setting down his pen and folding his hands in front of him.

“What are you referring to?”

You hated how he did this - it was an interrogation tactic, you knew that. He’d make the subject describe a situation with which both parties were clearly familiar to get their interpretation of events, which was usually very telling. And, more importantly, it made them uncomfortable.

You rolled your eyes. “I’m referring to you pulling me away from the group and telling me not to dance with that guy at the club.”

Hotch sighed and picked his pen back up, scanning his paperwork, making it very clear he felt this conversation wasn’t worth his time. “I explained my reasoning last night. If you take issue with the standards I expect of my team outside of the office-”

“But you don’t,” you blurted out, cutting him off.

“Don’t what?” he asked, now looking at you.

“Don’t expect that of your team,” you explained. “I talked to them about it just now. They said you’ve never acted that way before.”

“Their interpretation of events may be different-”

“It’s not their interpretation,” you interrupted for the second time. “They told me about all their dating escapades and you’ve never made it your business, not once. Why am I different to you?”

You hadn’t intended that last part to come out the way it did, and you cringed at the vulnerability in your tone. He was silent for one, two seconds, and you knew then he was making a decision, that the answer to your question wasn’t the simple truth he’d projected it to be.

“You’re the youngest member of the team, and the least experienced. I feel a responsibility to make sure you don’t make any decisions that you may regret. I’m sorry if you felt I was out of line.”

The detachment in his tone felt like a punch to the gut. Some part of you had been secretly wishing, you supposed, that his actions betrayed something deeper - that you were different to him, and not just because you were young and naive. And when the team had reacted the way they did, you’d gotten your hopes up that it had meant something. Just like him telling you about his past. Just like him killing Matthews. Just like… it didn’t matter . Even if he had been lying just now, it wouldn’t have changed anything. He wasn’t letting you in because he didn’t want to. You’d overestimated your significance in his life, but in reality, you were probably no more than a blip on his radar. Hotch was the sun, the central point to which everyone around him was drawn, and you were a lonely, distant planet that had somehow convinced yourself you were close enough to have gotten burned. 

Choking back undeserved tears, you left his office, fighting the bile that was finally rising from your stomach, realizing that this was about to be the second time in as many days that your feelings for him had made you puke.

  ____________

  When Matthews lunged at you, he hadn’t spared a thought, not a moment for consideration before breaking his neck. He knew, even as he felt the vertebra detach from its seat in the base of the skull, that there had been other paths - not that killing him was unrequited, of course, but it was a last-resort type of action, and Hotch had never been a last-resort type of man. Morgan hadn’t questioned it, not beyond a hushed, “You good?” after the whole thing went down, but he could sense his shock at the fact that Hotch was the one to go straight for lethality.

And your reaction - that was what kept him awake at night. Not killing the suspect; it was a sick truth, but he’d killed far too many people by now to have that same nauseous, horrified reaction he did the first few times. No, it was the way you looked at him afterwards. He’d expected shock, panic - hell, even complete disgust - but you’d looked at him like he was your hero. Like he was good, somehow. And he’d wanted to correct every day since, say, “No, you’ve got me wrong, I’m not what you think I am,” but he hadn’t mustered up the courage. He’d grown to need that look, if he was being honest with himself; needed someone to gaze upon him with the admiration and respect and doe-eyed awe that you did, because sometimes it was the only thing that kept him from going home alone to his apartment and shattering every mirror in the fucking place so he didn’t have to look at his reflection.

So when you’d asked him - all flushed face and halting words and twisting fingers - why he’d acted the way he did, he couldn’t be truthful with you. He’d answered with what should’ve been the truth, because he couldn’t tell you that he’d wanted to kick that boy’s teeth in from the minute he saw him touch you for daring to defile something so innocent and pure and good, even if you’d wanted it. Especially if you’d wanted it, if he was being honest with himself.

This was all twisted, of course. There were a million ways to profile a man in his 50’s who thought the way he did about someone your age (not to mention his employee, for fuck’s sake), none of them good. He’d deserved the raised eyebrow Rossi gave him before he stalked off to drag you from the dancefloor, and he’d more than deserved the constant, chiding internal voice scolding him whenever he paid too much attention to you, asked you an easy question just so he could see you light up at knowing the answer, divulged information he hadn’t talked about with anyone in years.

He saw how much his words affected you. You’d tried to hide it, but you were so endearingly bad at masking your feelings, and even though his stomach twisted to see you crushed, he felt a twinge of hope knowing you’d wanted a different answer. He could’ve given you one that would have made you happier:

“You’re important to me.”

“I was worried about you.”

Even, “I wanted to spend time with you last night, instead.”

But those were all too adjacent to a truth that he starkly refused to consider.

So he let you down, because letting people down was something with which Aaron Hotchner had plenty of goddamn practice. 

#hotch x reader #hotch x you #aaron hotchner x y/n #criminal minds fanfiction #hotch #criminal minds smut #Criminal Minds #aaron hotchner imagine #criminal minds headcanons #thomas gibson #thomas gibson fanfic #hotch fanfiction #jennifer jareau #emily prentiss #derek morgan #penelope garcia #david rossi #spencer reid #mgg #sub!reader #dom!hotch #standards of performance #fanfiction #ao3 #writing

[youvebeenlivingfictional]

I Could Be Your Sometimes Part Ten

Previous Part | Next Part | Masterlist Rating: Explicit - 18+ Only Notes: I hope y'all are having a good week :) Pairing: Andy Barber x Reader Warnings: Infidelity and sexual content. If you dislike this, please don’t read. Thank you. 

Chapter-specific warnings: Masturbation; fingering; implied dom/sub dynamic; dry humping Summary: I didn’t want to talk about this. I didn’t want to talk about the additional press coming up for those last-minute Christmas week deals; I didn’t want to talk about the drinks I’d gone out to with Laurie and Toby the day before that I’d barely been able to sit through, or the night that had followed with my tossing and turning in bed. 

“Come on, you should be heading home, anyway.” “Yeah, and I would be if I didn’t have shit to do.” “Maybe I could come up...Keep you company.” “Nu-uh. You’re never allowed in my office building again.” “You get in trouble for what happened?” “No, but if you come up here, I’m gonna want it to happen again.” I was warmed by Andy’s chuckle on the other end of the phone. “I’m giving you half an hour, and then I am parking outside and leaning on the horn.” I glanced at the time. It was nearly 7:30. “That is not nearly enough warning--” “Half an hour, angel,” Andy repeated before hanging up. I looked down at the phone before I eyed my powerpoint. If I didn’t stop to order food, I could be done with this in twenty-seven minutes, tops. --

“God, I am so hungry-- Are you hungry? I’m gonna call Harvey’s,” I groaned as we stepped into my apartment. “This late?” Andy asked, glancing down at his watch. “Yes. I never got to eat dinner. I was gonna have a leisurely office evening, you totally fucked up my plans,” I shrugged out of my coat and tossing it over the back of my armchair. “There’s no such thing as a ‘leisurely office evening’,” Andy argued as he tossed his coat over mine. He reached out, turning me back toward him, “And exactly how much money do you spend on takeout?” “Mm, way less than you think, ‘cause when I’m in the office, I just expense it, which was another part of my plan that you ruined, ‘cause you’re a plan-ruin-er.” I reached up, tweaking his nose before wriggling out of his grasp. “You want anything from Harvey’s or not?” I added, heading for the kitchen. “No.” “More for me,” I mumbled, dialing and tucking the phone under my ear as I opened the fridge, “Beer?” “Sure.” By the time I’d headed back into the living room, ordered my food, and opened beers for both of us, Andy had made himself comfortable on my couch. I settled down beside him, tucking myself into his side and passing him a beer. His arm curled around my shoulders and I sighed, closing my eyes. “When’s the food getting here?” “Like, forty minutes,” I mumbled, “When do you need to leave?” There was a pause; I assumed it was Andy checking his watch. “I’ve got a while.” I nodded, taking a sip from my beer and setting it on the coffee table before leaning back against Andy. He pressed a kiss to my head, murmuring, “You seem tired.” “Do I?” “Mm.” “Well, my last half-hour was a little rushed, see, some asshole threatened me with horn-leaning.” “This seems like more than a half-hour’s worth of tired.” I didn’t want to talk about this. I didn’t want to talk about the additional press coming up for those last-minute Christmas week deals; I didn’t want to talk about the drinks I’d gone out to with Laurie and Toby the day before that I’d barely been able to sit through, or the night that had followed with my tossing and turning in bed. I tipped my head up, brushing my lips across Andy’s. He pressed forward, deepening the kiss as his fingers slipped into my hair. “Don’t think... That I don’t know a ‘shut-up’ kiss when one is given, young lady,” He murmured. I smiled. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Mr. Barber,” I teased. Andy set his beer down on the coffee table before drawing me into his lap. I sighed as I was cuddled against his chest. I slid a hand up over his neck, thumb drifting over his Adam’s apple before I dropped it down, working to loosen his tie. Andy lowered a hand to my thighs, smoothing over them before he teasingly worked one between, cupping my mound and thumbing the zipper of my jeans. I shifted in his lap, trying to quell the throbbing between my legs. “You know,” He murmured, “I’d be taking these off of you if the delivery guy wasn’t on his way.” I reeled back to stare at Andy in disbelief. “Oh, so now this is my fault?” I asked, raising a brow. Andy shrugged. “Decisions were made, I don’t know if we need to rush to assign fault.” I laughed, disbelieving. “Wow, Barber-- You know what.” I swung around so that my back was against his chest, reaching down and taking hold of his knees. I pushed them apart, making him spread his legs before lowering myself onto the couch, nestled between his thighs. Then I leaned back against Andy’s chest and lifted my legs, settling them over his knees so that my thighs were splayed wide. I reached down, undoing the button and zip on my jeans. “What are you doing?” There was almost a waver to Andy’s voice, and I grinned wickedly. “If you won’t take care of me,” I said, slipping my hand under the waistband of my underwear, “Then I’ll take care of myself.” I was already wet; the anticipation of Andy coming home with me had had me squirming through the last half hour of work, regardless of how tired and hungry I was. I sighed as I smoothed my fingers over my lips, feeling the wetness gathered there. I bit my lip as I tipped my hips forward, alleviating some of the pressure I’d felt while I was driving home and trying not to grind against the seam of my fucking jeans. I sighed as I raised my hand, sliding it under my buttoned cardigan and tank top and groping my breast. Andy’s hand pressed to my side, and I tutted, reaching down and pushing it away. “You didn’t wanna help,” I reminded him. “I didn’t say that,” There was an edge of a whine to his voice. I let my head loll back onto my his shoulder. “Implied it.” I nipped at his jaw and Andy groaned. I glanced down, watching his hands hover above my waist before he clenched them into fists. “Put your hands on my thighs, Andy. Just put them there,” I murmured. Andy did as I said. I hummed. “Good boy,” I murmured. His hands tightened on my thighs as I said it; I could feel his cock straining in his pants, pressing against my lower back. I teased myself, loosing sighs and moans and watching Andy flush. “Can you do something for me?” I asked. “Yes.”  “Unbutton this for me?” I arched my back, pushing my chest out, “Put your hands back where they belong when you’re done.” Andy’s hands came up, obedient, albeit slow. I lifted my head and watched, the pad of my finger swirling around my clit as he undid the buttons. He tenderly pulled the fabric aside, exposing the swell of my breasts to the two of us. I felt him grind his cock against me and I shushed him, “Hands back down.” He did as I said, resting his hands back on my thighs. I raised my other hand, tugging my tank top down to expose my bra before I pulled the left cup down. I thumbed my nipple and I let my head fall back again, sighing. “ ‘m gonna get that damn thing off of you one of these days,” Andy grumbled. I giggled. “Oh yeah?” I asked, “When you take me apart?” His hips jolted at that. Someone liked that idea. Well, who was I kidding, both of us liked that idea. I lifted my hand away from my breast, holding my middle finger up and sliding it over Andy’s lips. “Suck,” I ordered. Andy’s lips parted, his tongue dipping out to delicately tease over the pad before he took the tip into his mouth, closing his eyes with a moan. I watched him, taking in the sight of his lashes fanned out across his cheeks, watching his pink lips dip and recede before they could reach my second knuckle. I teased a finger into myself at the same pace, pressing it deeper as Andy’s head bobbed. I pulled the finger out of his mouth before I lowered it to my nipple, swirling and teasing it, arching into the cool wetness as it hardened. Andy watched, lips still parted from when I’ll pulled my finger away. “Angel,” He murmured, hands tightening on my thigh, “Angel, please.”

“Please what?” I asked, tone feigning ignorance. “Lemme touch you.” “You are touching me.” “I need more, I need--” Andy cut himself off, hips rolling as he ground his erection against my back. “You need what?” I asked. As calm as I sounded, I was beginning to lose my cool a little. I wasn’t so used to being in charge, and hearing Andy come apart at the seams was doing things to me. “I need to touch you, I need to taste you-- Fuck,” Andy hissed, turning his head and pressing his face into my hair again, “Fuck, tell me what your hand is doing.” I closed my eyes, pressing a second finger into myself with a sigh. “I’m fucking myself, Andy.” “Shit,” Andy mumbled, “How many?” “Two.” “Does it feel good?” “Mmhm... Your hand would feel better. Your fingers are so long and...Fucking thick,” I pouted as I felt Andy lean away to look at me, “But you wouldn’t do it...” “I wanna do it,” Andy mumbled, “Please.” He leaned down, swiping his tongue into my mouth, lapping over my tongue, my teeth, before he pulled away, whispering, “Fuck.” I eased my fingers out of myself, pulling my hand out of my pants. I took hold of Andy’s hand with mine, guiding him under the waistband. And then, carefully, I guided in one of Andy’s fingers with one of mine. Our groans echoed through the apartment; I felt myself tighten up around our fingers as Andy and I began to move them in tandem. “Like this?” Andy asked it against my lips as I began to fuck myself against our fingers. I nodded, unable to speak. Andy slipped a second finger into me, his palm grinding against my clit as he finger-fucked me harder. “Fuck--Fuck, Andy, yes,” I moaned, giving my nipple as a pinch. His other hand lifted away from my thigh, covering my hand and giving my breast a squeeze. I pressed another finger in beside his and couldn’t help the high whine that left my throat. “That’s right,” Andy’s hips were meeting me roll for roll, “Fuck, that’s it--Feel so fucking wet an’ tight-- Can’t wait to have this pussy clamping down on my fucking cock--” I gasped as I came, hips bucking as my pussy pulsed hot around our fingers. I felt Andy’s hips press against my back, felt him groan as he kissed me filthily. I settled against his chest as we pulled our fingers out from my pants. I raised my fingers to his lips, coating his bottom lip in my juices. He lapped at his lip before sucking the fingers into his mouth. “Fuck,” I mumbled weakly, watching and feeling him suck my fingers clean, “Did you cum in your fucking pants?” “You try having someone squirm in your lap, we’ll see how well you hold it together,” Andy mumbled once I lowered my hand. I lifted my head as I heard the buzzer ring. “Ugh, right on fucking time,” I grumbled, pulling my bra and shirt back into their proper position before lowering my legs and refastening my jeans, “I’m starving.” Tag list: @jhayes6984;  @fanficadddddict69 ; @nina-sj​; @rosalynshields ; @what-is-your-wish​ ; @chris-butt

#I Could Be Your Sometimes #andy barber imagine #andy barber x reader #andy barber x you #Andy Barber/You

[becomewings]

Timelines: 30 August Year 22 (Diary)

“The red diary lay between us like a traffic light.

… I became more frightened the more I tried to be someone else. Wouldn’t my real self be discovered? Wouldn’t she be disappointed and leave me? I frantically hid myself and turned my head away from myself.

… I know now. That the insufficient me who makes mistakes and fails is indeed a part of myself. That no matter how cruel and merciless things are, only by being true to myself can I take the next step forward. I stood up from my spot and she didn’t try to grab me.

I went out to the street and took off my hat. As I swept my hair back, all the time I had spent trying so hard to be someone else seemed to slip through my fingers. I lifted my head and locked eyes with the me reflected in the window. A frail face, pale lips, thin shoulders. I looked endlessly shabby. I laughed. The me in the window laughed too.”

— SeokJin, 30 August Year 22. The Notes: Answer. Translation cr. @origamifirefly tw.

Gif 4 (SeokJin, 30 August Year 22; The Notes: Tear) and gif 6 (SeokJin, 30 August Year 22; The Notes: Answer) translation cr. @origamifirefly tw. All other captions from The Notes 1: SeokJin, 30 August Year 22 (#2).

Commentary below the cut. CW: contains mention of blood

❀

It’s been a long time since my last posts in the Timelines series (May 22, to be precise)! While August 30 is the latest entry of all the Notes published to date, references have been made to events later in September that trigger more time loops. I doubt this will be the end of the series—and I am also certain that I will be revising and reissuing posts for earlier key dates, including this one, as more information is revealed. My goal with these Timelines posts is to trace SeokJin’s specific efforts to manipulate events and to highlight these changes within the different versions of each date’s texts.

There are currently 4 entries for SeokJin on August 30: one from Tear, one from Answer, and two from The Notes 1. The version from Answer, excerpted above, is apparently the “repaired” timeline: rather than intending to confess his love to the girl that night at the fireworks display, he confesses that everything he has done for her was taken from the diary she lost. On the other hand, the entries from Tear and Notes 1 seem to present (an) earlier version(s). The uncertain parentheses are brought to you by the fact that, while they seem to describe the same unfolding of events—the girl being struck in the road as SeokJin looks on with the smeraldo bouquet—the texts are slightly different.

Both the Tear and the second August 30 entry from Notes 1 include the quote captioned in gif 3. The full quote (sourced from Notes 1): “The bouquet of Smeraldo flowers fell from my hand. She was lying in the middle of the road. Blood began to spread out from underneath her tousled hair. Dark red blood flowed down the road.” But the following lines are different. Gif 4’s caption is from Tear: “I thought. If only I could turn back time.” Gif 5’s caption is from Notes 1: “With a loud pop, the first set of fireworks burst into the air on the night sky in the distance. Somewhere, I heard a mirror crack.”

“I thought. If only I could turn back time.” To me, this is a fascinating turn of phrase. We are most likely assuming, at this point, that SeokJin has already time travelled. In the Save Me webtoon, it certainly appears that he begins returning to April 11 much earlier in order to save his friends. But what if that wasn’t the case? What if his thought wasn’t a reflex but a sign that he had not yet been sent back in time? There is plenty of evidence in other entries that the number of loops SeokJin has tried and failed is affecting both his character and his memory. Still, I’m only tentatively posing this as a possibility because the ambiguity of the Tear version’s placement in the overall timeline of the narrative is further complicated by its first paragraph (also not present in Notes 1):

“Can anyone remember the moment they fell in love? Can anyone predict the moment their love will end? What could be the reason that humans don’t have the ability to recognize those moments? And why was I given the power to return [restore] all of those things?”

— SeokJin, 30 August Year 22. The Notes: Tear. Translation cr. @origamifirefly tw.

Therefore, it seems possible that the Tear entry, as a whole, is written from two different perspectives: a SeokJin who is aware of his time traveling and a SeokJin who has yet to embark on that journey. But like much of the Notes, it is really up to interpretation. What do you think? Please come yell at me in my inbox if you have thoughts to share!

Note: I unfortunately do not know Korean and do not own either the Korean Notes 1 or Notes from the album (with the exception of MotS:7), so I rely on the official English translation of Notes 1 and fan translations of the album Notes (I do my best to compare multiple versions of the latter). Any mistakes in misunderstanding the differences between the text are my own. Particularly in this instance, I recognize the possibility that some of the variations in the August 30 texts occur between the translations of Notes 1, rather than between the Tear and Notes 1 entries. If you have the Korean Notes 1, I would LOVE to hear how similar its August 30 entry is to its English counterpart, especially in regard to the fireworks/mirror cracking line that seems most different from the final line in the Tear entry. (And/or if you also happen to have the original Korean Tear entry, that would be a fantastic point of comparison too!)

❀

Love Yourself Highlight Reel '起承轉結' Wings Short Film #5 Reflection

#networkbangtan #bangtanarmynet #armysource #dailybangtan #btsgif #seokjin #jin #bts universe #hyyh #bangtan universe #bts the notes #timelines #bts highlight reel #bts reflection #bts theories #smeraldo

[jaxsteamblog]

Ambassador

Click here to read the entire fic on AO3

After the daylong comedy of errors, and a scathing phone call from Katara, Zuko and Sokka sat across from each other, staring down at Zuko’s phone. Zuko was sure they were both trying to process everything that happened, but there wasn’t any way for him to begin to understand.

He was still trying to find out if he was going to get in trouble for breaking into the North Pole and breaking his leg. This was completely out of his capacity for logic.

“Could you imagine if it was Katara instead of me who ended up as ambassador?” Sokka asked as they headed toward the private wing.

“Hmm.” Zuko intoned, narrowing his eyes.

“What?” Sokka asked, glancing over.

“I’m trying to figure out if that would be better or worse.” Zuko said.

“I’m going to assume you mean that as a purely hypothetical because you are, of course, thrilled that your best friend is living here now.” Sokka said, shoving Zuko hard enough to make him stumble.

Zuko chuckled, quickly regaining his balance.

“Of course. But I think I’d somehow manage to get even less work done with her around.” He said.

“That’s my sister, dude.” Sokka groaned.

Zuko laughed. But as the night went on, and he lay in bed, he wondered what it would have been like.

“If the Fire Lord is ready,” the assistant said, bowing low, “the White Lotus has arrived.” 

Zuko straightened his robe and stood behind his desk, nodding curtly for the assistant to usher in his guests. 

When the White Lotus announced the ambassador program, he worried about what kind of impression he would make on the diplomats. He was the traitorous son of the now imprisoned usurper Fire Lord. Iroh tried to assure him that the Earth Kingdom delegate was sympathetic, but Zuko didn’t know how fully he believed that.

And neither Sokka nor Katara had given him much of a hint when he asked about the Water Tribe.

“Good to see you again, Zuko.” A subdued voice said and Zuko roused himself.

“Welcome, Master.” He replied, bowing. Piandao waved his hand dismissively, and Zuko tried to calm down as he straightened.

The other members of the White Lotus, excluding Iroh, trickled in.

When Tenzin came into view, Zuko flinched. He could never figure out where he stood with the Air Nomad leader. 

“Fire Lord Zuko, I have the appointments here.” Tenzin said. As the older man walked forward, he held out the dense scrolls; a number of colored seals spilled out from the ends. 

“Thank you.” Zuko said, starting to walk around his desk but halting as his assistant intercepted the scrolls. Of course he couldn’t take his own paperwork.

“Fire Lord.” The assistant said, bowing. Zuko withheld his sigh as he took the scrolls. 

Cracking open the Earth Kingdom seal on one, he quickly scanned the characters. He had no idea who Mr. Ying was, but maybe that was a good thing. No news was good news.

Setting the open scroll on his desk, he neatly split the Water Tribe seal. 

Before he could even read it, his eyes caught on the familiar characters.

“Katara?” He questioned.

“While she does not have a lot of experience,” Tenzin said carefully. “She was appointed by the Avatar herself.” 

“No, that’s fine. It’s just…” Zuko cleared his throat, trying to regain his composure. “I was under the impression that Master Katara was enrolled in medical school.” 

“She’s doing this at the personal request of the Avatar.” Katara’s voice said from behind the door.

“Master Katara, this is highly inappropriate.” Tenzin said, his voice flat.

“Aw come on, you knew this was going to happen.” Katara replied as she stepped into the room. Zuko’s throat dried and he busied himself with rolling up the scroll.

“That’s why I was against this whole thing.” Tenzin sighed.

“Too bad no one can say no to Thuy.” Katara retorted and then turned her attention to Zuko.

“Hi Katara.” Zuko said, unable to stop his smile.

“Hey.” She said with a bright smile of her own.

Dinner that night passed in a blur. Zuko could barely remember talking to the Earth Kingdom ambassador, instead watching Katara engage with the others at her table. For some reason, it made his heart flutter seeing her laugh with the governor of Hira’a.

After dinner, Zuko offered to show Katara around one of the gardens. She agreed readily, and they went out into the cool night, silence finally finding them.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He asked, when they were far enough away from the palace.

“I wanted it to be a surprise.” Katara said.

“But what about school?” Zuko asked. 

“I was failing out.” She sounded pained, and Zuko grabbed her hand, squeezing it gently.

“I’m sorry.” He said.

“It’s okay. Maybe I’ll go back later, to a smaller school. I know I can do it, but those lecture halls were massive.” She replied and they were quiet again.

There was work to be done with her around, and Zuko knew that rationally. But a lot of the work involved the war, and as he looked over at her, he grew concerned. 

One of the many projects meant to handle the wartime tragedies was paying out reparations and benefits to former POWs. That included Katara’s own father. 

Then there was the subject of her mother. 

“The work is going to be hard.” Zuko said.

“I know.” 

“And personal.”

Katara stopped him, pulling on his hand to make him turn.

“Do you think I can’t handle it?” She asked.

“It’s not that. I’m worried it’s going to hurt you.” Zuko replied. 

Katara took his other hand in hers and gently swung them, looking down at the ground.

“I know it was rash, but I didn’t want to lose this chance.” She said.

“What chance?” Zuko asked.

“Being with you.” Katara looked up at him, a small smile on her face.

Zuko frowned, and her face fell.

“What is it?” She asked.

Zuko took back his hands and held her face, stepping in to kiss her. Katara leaned into him, running her hands up his back. Her lips, her tongue, her breath, everything that he could take in, Zuko took greedily. 

When he did step back, Katara reeled, slightly dazed.

“That was nice.” She murmured. 

“This isn’t like you.” Zuko said.

“What are you talking about?” She asked, a laugh in the background of her words.

“You would never put me before everything else.” Zuko said, then sighed, looking bemused. “As much as I would love that.”

“Of course I would! I love you, Zuko.” Katara said.

“No, you wouldn’t. You would’ve dropped out when I asked you to if that were true. You would always chase your dream to be a doctor, because you love your people more than anything else.” Zuko countered.

“You are my dream.” She said firmly. 

“I am very much not.” Zuko, still holding her face, looked into her eyes. “Plus, you would be terrible at this job.”

“And why’s that?” Katara asked, moving her hands to hold onto his arms. 

“Because if I were to work in any sort of proximity with you, I would be trying to get you alone and in a locked room.”

“Zuko!” 

“You would be amazing. You would fight for your people here, even as the work eroded you. You would balance out all of the hostile mess in my court. You would be bound to the spirit that surrounds my entire country and that, well,” Zuko smiled and Katara’s face flushed. “I don’t want to explain why that intrigues me so much.” 

“So why do you say this isn’t my dream?” She asked.

“Because it’s mine.” Zuko said softly, kissing her again. 

Having her near him was everything he could ever want. He wanted to dress her in red and black, with the blue tied neatly at her neck. He wanted her at court, bearing down on his ministers and governors that constantly stymied his work. He wanted her compassion and her vengeance as he made his penance for the war. 

There would be long nights as they worked together on these projects. He wanted to see her asleep every single night. He wanted to pin a crown in her hair.

“I am going to marry you.” Zuko said.

“Yes.” Katara agreed.

“Blazes, I’ve never wanted anything so badly in my life.” He said, his voice shaking manic energy.

“Nothing?” She asked, coyly.

“Well…” Zuko replied.

Loud knocking made Zuko jolt upright.

“Fire Lord? Your breakfast is ready.” Someone called through his door.

Sitting up, Zuko rubbed his face. 

It had been three days, and he was already back to having these dreams again. 

Gripping his blanket, Zuko looked over at the empty half of his bed.

A broken leg hadn’t been that bad, all things considered.

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#jax writes #zutara #zutara month #zutara month 2021 #fanfiction #modern au #the fic that prompts built

[ihopuhopwehop]

I like to see your take on one of this: we need more of this prompt

🔥Zutara 🌊

The Ember Island Players doing a play for the Fire Nation's Most Beloved Relationship, Firelord Zuko of the Fire Nation and Master Katara of the Southern Water Tribe, but the craze doubled when they didn't get together, or did they???

Basically, the whole Fire Nation and selected people from both the Earth Kingdom and Water Tribes creating a system that could get them access to other fan works of the two.

Sokka started it. He lives for a good dose of chaos.

Hello! Thank you so much for being so patient with me as I finish finals! I took my last one yesterday and submitted a ten-page essay :D I am now done!! And as such, I just finished this! I hope you enjoy it!!

I present...

ZUTARA: A MUSICAL

THIS WEEKEND ONLY, FREE ADMISSION TO THE EMBER ISLAND PLAYERS RENDITION OF THE MOST THRILLING TALE OF ROYALTY AND ROMANCE, ZUTARA: THE MUSICAL. DOORS OPEN AT 7:30 PM. COMPLEMENTARY FIRE FLAKES WILL BE SERVED UPON ADMISSION.

Sokka had done a good thing today. Or rather an entertaining thing. He sold his sister out. That’s right, her and Firelord Zuko want to have a secret relationship behind his back while he’s out training warriors in the South Pole, then they’re gonna get what’s coming.

Really, if they had just told him themselves he would have been fine with it…eventually, but having them trust him enough to tell him would have helped him get over it a lot quicker BUT NO instead he found out through Uncle Iroh making an offhanded comment about their children being called steambabies and Sokka being understandably confused and Uncle Iroh nonchalantly mentioning that they were a couple now.

Sokka, at the time, had been so surprised that he spit out his bite of fried armadillo bear meat, which was unfortunate really because Fire Nation cuisine had so many new and delectable flavors. Uncle Iroh had looked alarmed when he realized Sokka had not been told yet, but Sokka really wasn’t paying attention to Iroh’s supposed to-be soothing parables as he figured that must have been why Katara had decided to stay in the Fire Nation this time around instead of coming back home with him. It must also be why Aang had been in a particularly foul mood the last few weeks.

Sokka was brought back to the present as the man at the booth handed him a plump bag of coins.

“Thanks for the tip kid, this play is sure to be a hit. So many people shipped them together already.”

Sokka inwardly blanched at that, knowing that must mean Katara and Zuko were out in public together a lot, but he pushed that thought aside to continue the conversation.

“No problem. Let me know how it goes. Oh and if you could send a script over to King Bumi of the Earth Kingdom, that’d be great. He’s always looking for romance novels to read.”

The greasy man looked at him like he was crazy to suggest sending a king this type of play but nodded his head none-the-less.

“Will do. —” The man paused, “Say, aren’t you Master Katara’s brother?”

Sokka smirked, “That I am. That I am, kind sir.” Sokka then realized he couldn’t let his sister know it was him who released the play, so he held up his boomerang and pointed it at the man’s head, “But you can’t tell her anything! She’d kill me if she knew I told.”

The man’s eyebrows raised in surprise, “So it’s true? Firelord Zuko and Master Katara of the Southern WaterTribe are dating?”

Sokka reeled at that, “No, no! Er, no, I mean, maybe? Who knows, only time will tell, bye now!”

And with that he turned on his heel, proud of his recovery of that conversation.

Katara stormed into Zuko’s meeting room the minute the last fire sage ambled out.

“What the spirits is this?” She asked as she slammed a flyer for ZUTARA:THE MUSICAL down on the large marble table.

Zuko raised an eyebrow as his eyes swept over the page. He was about to respond to her inquiry when she continued in her rage, “Did you tell someone?!?”

Zuko stepped back a space to put a little more distance between her anger and himself, “No of course not! Did you?”

She ran a hand through her dark curls, narrowly avoiding getting them caught in her braids, “Would I be this mad if I told? Of course, I didn’t tell! I haven’t even told Sokka yet!”

That was when Zuko remembered something that he knew would cause a problem from them. He sighed loudly and drug a hand down his face, “We need Uncle in here.” He turned to his assistant standing a few paces behind him in the corner, “Could you please tell my Uncle his presence is requested in the Peace Meeting Room?” As the assistant nodded and turned to leave, Zuko offered a kind ‘thank you’ and turned back to Katara.

“I think Iroh knows.”

Katara looked shocked but then composed herself, realizing it would have only been a matter of time before he knew since they were always working in close quarters anyway.

“What makes you think he knows?” She asked as she moved to sit down in a previously vacated seat.

Zuko didn’t answer for a minute and Katara realized he looked a little embarrassed. “What Zuko? Why would he know?”  

“I believe he was having tea in the garden when we were watching the turtleducks last week. I hadn’t noticed he was there until he mentioned during our weekly tea time that sleeping by the pond may not be the safest thing to do, but he was glad I had a waterbender by my side to do it.”

Katara groaned, “Of course Iroh knows! He’s too smart not too!” Katara then paused as she remembered the day by the pond. Her and Zuko had gone to watch the turtleducks and fell asleep in each other’s arms. Then when they had woken up, her and Zuko chased each other around the pond, which ended up in her pushing him into the pond with his full Firelord Regala on. It was hilarious watching the turtleducks swim up to him as he pouted in the water.

She giggled a little as she thought of his face and noticed Zuko’s features soften in real time.

“We’ll figure it out Kat. Plus, he was bound to know sometime right? As long as he didn’t tell anyone else…”

“But who told! Do you think it was one of the guards? Or your assistant?”

“They’ve been instructed not to, I highly doubt they would disobey my orders on something like this.”

She raised an eyebrow, “’something like this’?” She questioned.

Zuko grimaced knowing he had said the wrong words, “Something that isn’t relevant to war, peace, or the outcome of humanity. Us dating isn’t a big deal unless we get engaged or the public finds out too soon.”

Katara pursed her lips, “Maybe not a big deal to you, but I had to turn down the Avatar. That’s bound to have some repercussions if people find out.”

Zuko shook his head, “You turned down Aang, our friend.”

Katara was starting to get angry, “Yeah, our friend, The Avatar, who thought it was his destiny to marry me! You don’t think Aang would have told just to get back at us do you? I don’t think he would but if he was hurt enough…” Katara trailed off worriedly.

“I highly doubt he had time to tell anyone. He went with Toph to the Western Air Temple to restore the architecture, he would have had his hands full with that.”

Katara nodded slightly thinking over who could have told, but the only people that had appeared to know were the palace workers, Iroh, and Aang.

Zuko sat down beside her, putting a hand over the one she had resting on the table. “We’ll figure it out Kat. For now let’s talk to Uncle and see if he knows anything.” Just as he leaned forward to give her a kiss, he noticed his Uncle shuffle through the large, oval doors. He pulled back and tried not to smirk at Katara’s disappointed face.

His Uncle chuckled, “Don’t stop on my account Nephew. I got an eyeful last week.”

Zuko scowled at him, “Uncle, tell me you didn’t tell anyone?”

His Uncle took on a guilty face causing Katara to bang her head on the table and Zuko to groan.

“Uncle!”

“It was an accident! I was having lunch with Master Katara’s brother upon his arrival yesterday, and he pulled it out of me! He is a master of persuasion that one.”

Katara chuckled, but then stopped as she realized this meant that Sokka knows. “Sokka knows? As in, he knows?!”

She stood up abruptly, “What did you tell him?!”

Uncle Iroh looked sheepish, “Er. That your children would be called steambabies.”

Katara gaped while Zuko flushed in embarrassment, “Uncle! You didn’t!”

“Ah. But I did. So sorry Zuko, but a friend of mine from the Northern Water Tribe sent me a scroll that a student of his had written about you and Lady Katara that mentioned the clever name. Apparently, many people are speculating on your relationship. Some even encourage it by writing.”

Zuko furrowed his brow, “What do you mean “encourage it by writing?”

His Uncle smiled, “I mean romance scrolls, nephew.”

Zuko banged his head on the table while Katara gasped slightly. “You mean people are writing stories about us! What kind of stories! How did they even know? I hope my dad hasn’t heard about this yet.”

“Ah, the soul of the world is always searching for new love. Especially when a good story, such as two royals come about. Adds dramatic effect.”

At this Zuko grabbed the previously forgotten flyer and slid it harshly towards his Uncle, “Did you have anything to do with this Uncle?”

His Uncle beamed, “No, but I wish I had. A musical! How creative!”

Katara and Zuko both groaned.

After a short pause of her and Zuko thinking, and Iroh requesting a pot of Jasmine tea, Katara spoke again, “We need to speak to Sokka.”

------------------------------------

Sokka strolled happily back up the steps of his sister’s boyfriend’s palace and was met with a guard and a servant.

“Master Sokka of the Southern Water Tribe, your presence is requested in Lady Katara’s living quarters.”

Sokka smirked, knowing he was about to tease his sister beyond belief. That, or freak out, depending on what she was doing with Zuko when he got there.

“Alright, is she, alone, by chance?”

The servant hesitated before answering, “I believe she is with Firelord Zuko and Royal Advisor and Dragon of the West, Iroh Sozin.”

Sokka furrowed his brows in confusion over Iroh being there but didn’t think much of it as he ascended the steps towards her bedroom.

He slammed both doors open as he strutted through the door, “Hello Princess Master Katara of the Southern Water Tribe, daughter of Chief Hakoda, sister of the handsome Master Sokka, friend of the Avatar, and girlfriend to—”

Katara interrupted his speech unfortunately, with Uncle Iroh watching in pleased amusement. “Alright we get it, you know. But did you tell anyone Sokka, because if you did, so help me…”

Before she could roll out any threat Sokka interrupted her, “Excuse me! If you had just told me yourself this wouldn’t have happened!”

Katara’s eyes narrowed as Zuko raised his brow in surprise, “What wouldn’t have happened Sokka?”

He stuttered, “Er- uh, I wouldn’t have choked on my armadillo bear meat?”

Iroh nodded sagely, remembering the night before.  

“Sokka,” she said in warning, drawing out the last syllable of his name.

“Ok, alright fine! I implied you were dating but I didn’t confirm it! I left it up to the viewers discretion!”

Katara and Zuko both looked surprised and then turned to anger.

“Sokka! —” Zuko started.

“You did this?!” Katara finished punctuating her sentence with thrusting a paper at him.

He looked down at the paper to see a flyer for the musical, “Man, word travels fast here.” He mumbled under his breath.

“Yeah word does travel fast here, and because of you people know that their nation’s leader is dating the daughter of the Southern Water Tribe! Do you know what this could do?! Other nations could be mad that they found out so callously, think that the Water Tribe will get more resources because of our relationship, or Agni, even be mad she’s not dating the Avatar! Why would you do this?!” Zuko asked raising his voice.

“Hey! If you guys had just told me from the beginning that you were dating, no one else would have had to know! Instead I find out because you are having steambabies!”

“I was planning to tell you when you got here, but Iroh beat me to it! And besides, we just wanted some privacy before everyone else found out! Is that so bad?” Katara asked, feeling guilty for not telling her family yet, but knowing she wouldn’t take back the last few weeks for anything.

“How long has this been going on?” Sokka asked angrily when he noticed Zuko reach out to touch Katara’s elbow. His eyes flashed between the two of them.

Katara hesitated while Zuko answered quietly, “about a month and a half.”

Sokka blanched, “Before I even left! What, you couldn’t even write me a letter Katara or or—explain why you didn’t come back with me?! I had to explain to the tribe that their princess was staying with the Firelord for some unknown reason! And not to mention Aang stopped by and was moody all week leaving everyone to believe something happened between you two, and I still had no idea why my sister wasn’t there with me.”

Sokka realized he wasn’t hurt because they wanted privacy, he was hurt that Katara had chosen not to tell him why she was abandoning their trip back home.

Sokka was pulled out of his head when Katara placed a hand on his shoulder, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you the reason I wasn’t going back yet. I just wanted some time alone to sort things out with Zuko and figure out the best way to tell you and the tribe I was dating the Firelord. Can you forgive me?”

Sokka thought about it for a second before nodding petulantly.

Katara quirked a smile, “Good. Because I need you to meet my boyfriend.” Katara was now smirking and Zuko was beaming at her.

Sokka gagged, “Gross! Don’t go all googly-eyed in front of me Sparky!”

Katara laughed, “Then you’re really not going to like this!” Katara let go of his shoulder and crossed the room to kiss Zuko passionately with Sokka gaping and Uncle Iroh chuckling.

“Eww! Oogies! Stop, stop! You just told me, ease me into the affection won’t you!” Sokka covered his eyes and only looked up when he heard Katara laughing and Zuko turning red from embarrassment.

“Like you and Suki don’t kiss all the time!” Katara waggled her eyebrows as Iroh stood up.

“Ah, young love. Lovely to be but hard to see.” He said as he ambled out the door with a short wave to them all.

They all burst out laughing at his odd parable and then continued chatting into the night, including Katara explaining what happened between her and Aang and Sokka giving Zuko a warning not to hurt his sister.

----------------------------------

A servant walked up to the throne of Earth King Bumi and bowed as he bestowed a scroll to him.

Bumi quirked an eyebrow at the unexpected mail and snatched it out of his friends’ hand.

His eyes widened in joy as he read the title of ZUTARA: A MUSICAL. His hooting laugh and a few snorts echoed throughout the room as he continued reading the dialogue between Master Katara and Firelord Zuko.

“Zu Li, send a copy of this dialogue to Piandao of the Fire Nation, Pakku of the Northern and Southern Water Tribe, and…Toph Beifong of the Beifong Family. They will be sure to enjoy this script.” He continued snorting as the servant made to take and copy the scroll.

----------------------------------

Master Piandao was not surprised to learn that his former pupil and current Firelord, Zuko, was dating Master Katara of the Southern Water Tribe. Before the final battle of the war, they had seemed very close to each other. He was only surprised it took them this long to figure everything out. None-the-less, he thought it a good idea to stop by the play, especially since Ember Island was not far from his vacation home. He could use a good vacation and a play to lighten his spirits.

He packed up his carry-on, including a sword gifted to him by Sokka, created by his metal bending friend, and boarded a faery across the way.

----------------------------------

Mater Pakku of the Northern and Southern Water Tribe scanned the scroll King Bumi had sent him, wondering why on earth the crazy king would choose to send a play about his granddaughter dating the Firelord to him. Was this a hint? He thought. Did King Bumi know something he didn’t?

There was only one way to find out.

Attend the Musical that would be played in two days’ time. Hopefully the fire nation will be able to clear a few things up for him. He packed up his things, kissed Kanna goodbye, saying he had business to attend to in the Fire Nation, and readied the ship that would take him to Ember Island. He decided not to tell Kanna about her granddaughter’s happenings unless something was actually happening.

----------------------------------

Aang brought a scroll that had been delivered to the Western Air Temple for Toph, over to her handmade earth house and walked in without knocking.

“Toph! You have a letter!” He called as he moved into the house and rummaged through her cabinets for some fresh fruit.

“Twinkle Toes, we’ve been over this, I’m blind! You’re going to have to read it to me.” Toph said as she moved into the kitchen to sit at the table across from where Aang had sat to eat her food.

Aang sheepishly rubbed the back of his head, “Right. Sorry. Um, okay…” He went to unroll the scroll and promptly frowned at what he saw. ZUATARA: THE MUSICAL? Had Katara and Zuko already announced they were dating? He knew they were but they had said they would give him a warning before they told everyone so that he would be prepared for the questions about his and Katara’s own failed relationship.

“What is it?” Toph asked curiously as she noticed Aang heartbeat pick up.

“Um.” He had yet to tell Toph that Katara and Zuko were dating and he wasn’t sure it was his place to do so. But if they can publish a play about it, surely he could tell Toph.

“King Bumi sent a script of a play. Um, a musical to be exact.”

Toph’s face brightened, “Really! What is it this time!? He sent me a few leaflets a few weeks ago, I’ve been waiting for more!”  [pretend that braille is a thing back then and that king bumi normally sends her stories made with earth that has braille on it :)]

Aang scratched the back of his head again, “Zutara.” He mumbled quietly. He was surprised when Toph’s smile got even wider.

“No way! Did they finally get their crap together? Or is it just another romance scroll that ships them?”

Aang spluttered, “another romance scroll? You mean there’s more of Zuko and Katara?”

Toph schooled her features, “No. There is none of Zuko and Katara. Speaking of which, how are you and Katara doing, by the way?”

She noticed his heartbeat pick up again and wondered if that was a good or bad thing.

“We uh—well we broke up I guess? We were never really official, but I had assumed we would be together, but she rejected me several weeks ago because she said her and Zuko were dating…” He trailed off at Toph’s excited, “Alright!!”

He stared at her for a moment until she continued, “I mean. I’m sorry you and Sugar Queen didn’t work out Twinkle Toes, but really it’s for the best. No offence. Zuko and Katara have been dancing around their feelings for each other for ages and then when he took that bolt of lightening for her, I just knew they would be together! But anyways, how are you handling this?”

“I mean, I’m okay now. It was hard at first because it was so unexpected but then they said they would wait to tell everyone so I could have some time to get myself together. Guess that only meant a few weeks though if they are okay with a musical being made about them.”

“No way, this has Snoozles written all over it. I bet he found out and wanted to mess with them.”

Aang hadn’t considered that Sokka did not know yet, but if he had found out, he was sure Sokka would do something to cause drama. There was a lull in the conversation as Toph and Aang both thought about what the musical meant.

“There’s only one way to find out if they’re telling people.”

Aang sighed, “We have to go, don’t we?”

Toph let out a decidedly more girly grunt then Aang had ever heard her make and she jumped up from the table, “Let’s go see a musical!!”

Aang smirked, “You’re blind Sifu Toph, you can’t see a musical.”

“Spirits, Aang, you can see, can’t you? So my point still stands! Maybe we’ll even get a seat on the ground floor so I can see!”

Aang shook his head while Toph ran back towards her room to begin packing. He was excited to be getting a short break but seeing a musical about how his forever girl chose someone else was not what he had in mind. Oh well, Toph would need someone to steer Appa.

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Uncle Iroh had bought 2 extra tickets for the musical. He had received letters from Piandao and Pakku stating they would be coming this weekend to catch the musical. He wrote back saying he secured a seat for them both, while ignoring Pakku’s questions about his nephew and Pakku’s granddaughter’s relationship. Pakku would find out soon enough.

He also secured enough bags of fireflakes to enjoy throughout the play, along with some ginseng tea for himself. Dinner and a show were Iroh’s cup of tea.

He noticed that Sokka had also secured two extra tickets, though Iroh was not sure whether it was for Toph and Aang or perhaps Suki and someone else. But he would find out soon enough.

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Katara’s POV:

Zuko and Katara had debated on whether or not they should go. If they went, they could play off the musical as a joke, but if they didn’t there would be no news to confirm it either. In the end, Sokka had convinced them to go so he could brag about his playwriting skills, even if Katara thought it was weird that her brother wrote a romance play about her.

Sokka had also warned her that Aang and Toph would be coming, which worried Katara, at least for Aang’s sake, but also upped their credibility if they decided to play it off as a funny musical with no truth to it.

None-the-less she was excited to have almost the whole gang together again, even if for something as stupid as a musical. Though, Katara thought it was a better reason to be together than because of a raging war.

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It was now the first showing of ZUTARA: A MUSICAL and Sokka was thriving.

He was an hour early to his written show and already half the auditorium was filled. He had also gone backstage to see how the Ember Island Players created costumes and such, and they had done spectacular, though Zuko’s scar was still on the wrong side. Sokka thought that added comedic effect so he left it be.

Just then someone punched him in the arm, making his spill his bag of fireflakes.

“Ow! Watch it— oh, its you.” He said to Toph petulantly.

Toph grinned, “Hello Snoozles. How’s the play coming?”

Sokka grinned, “It’s great the costumes are amazing! They left Zuko’s scar on the wrong side like before.”

Toph chuckled, “Classic. Now where’s Sugar Queen and Sparky?”

“Zuko’s coming with Iroh later and Katara went to the bathroom. She thought it’d be better for them to come separately.”

Toph raised her eyebrows, “Wait so they aren’t dating?”

“Shh!!” Sokka whispered, though no one was around their families seat since Zuko let them sit in a Royal Suite. He then leaned closer to Toph to continue their conversation, “They are dating but they don’t want to announce it yet. And anyways, where’s Aang? I thought he was coming?”

“He went to get some more fireflakes.”

Sokka pouted, “I wish I had fireflakes, but somebody just had to punch them out of my hand!”

Toph snickered, “Stop whining. You’re a guest to the FireLord, just order someone to get some more for you.”

Sokka looked aghast, “I’m not going to order them to do it, I’ll just ask Aang for some of his. We can share like old times.”

Toph smiled lightly, “Hopefully this play will end better than the other one.”

“If they kept my ending the same, it should.” Sokka assured.

Just then Katara, Aang, and Pakku walked in. Sokka was surprised to see his step-grandfather in the fire nation.

“Pakku?! What are you doing here?”

Sokka stood to greet him and noticed him eyeballing Katara and Aang chatting amicably in the doorway.

Pakku smiled slightly, “I came to see if the rumor about my granddaughter was true, though judging by her and Aang, I’d say they are not.”

Sokka replied after he hugged Pakku, “Oh no. They are, the people just don’t know it yet, so if you could keep it on the down low that’d be great.”

Pakku looked at Sokka like he was 400-foot-tall purple platypus-bear with pink horns and silver wings.

“What do you mean they’re true!?! Katara is dating Zuko, the FIRELORD!?” Pakku’s outrage was met with four people shushing him before Katara came over to explain.

“Pakku, I’m sorry we didn’t tell you sooner, but we wanted to work everything out first and then tell the tribe. No body else knows besides those in this booth, so please don’t tell anyone else, not even Gran-Gran.”

Pakku opened his mouth to argue until Aang came up and hugged him. “Long time no see Master Pakku. How are things in the Poles?”

That was enough to distract Pakku for the moment, which Katara was thankful for.

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Zuko had on his casual FireLord Tunic, instead of the entire ensemble. Uncle Iroh had said casual wear would be fine for the night since it was not a peace meeting or something like it. It was just a night on the town.

Even so, Zuko kept fidgeting with the edge of his sleeves. He was so nervous. He didn’t want to make a mistake and accidently kiss Katara in front of everyone and he also didn’t know how the play would turn out. It was nerve-wracking, especially knowing Pakku and Piandao were also here to see the play about a rumored romance regarding himself.

He thought it really weird.

As he walked beside Uncle and Piandao into the Ember Island auditorium and up the steps to the royal suite, he couldn’t help but get more nervous as camera’s shuttered around them. [I don’t know if cameras were a thing back then but if LOK can have everything they did, surely some type of camera would have been invented, even if it’s a crappy one]

He made sure to stand tall and not look directly at them so he could avoid any unwanted questioning and when he made it into the suite, he sat in between Sokka and Uncle so that no one would suspect anything of his and Katara.

But it was so hard.

He really wanted to hold her hand or something, but with Pakku behind him and the possibility of someone seeing him, he didn’t risk it.

And it seemed Sokka was enjoying his torture because he kept throwing slick glances his way and then failing to suppress a smirk.

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Katara chewed on her lip as the lights finally went down. She was worried about Pakku threatening Zuko, about the play, and about what the public would say. She hoped they would accept them being together, but she knew it wouldn’t be that easy. Especially because she was a waterbender from the South Pole.

Either way, she pushed these thoughts aside to focus on what Sokka called his “creative genius”.

 His creative genius disappointed her as her character’s first song was about hope. She threw Sokka a hard glare as she noticed both him and Zuko trying to suppress their laughter. They weren’t very good at it, and when Toph starting laughing loudly, they too burst into uncontrollable laughter. She smacked both of them on the back of the head and then faced forward with her arms crossed. She thought she even heard Aang giggling and that just made it all worse.

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Several scenes later and now Katara was the one smirking. The play had Zuko’s character singing about teen angst and turtle ducks, which she found hilarious because only Zuko’s friends would know that the angsty Firelord truly adored turtle ducks.

Her, Sokka, and Aang all shared a look before glancing at Zuko and when his face shifted into a scowl, they couldn’t help but burst into raucous laughter, with Uncle Iroh, Piandao, and Toph joining in.

Zuko scowled even further.

  ----------------------------------

It seemed Sokka had based a lot of the story from real life events that were dramatized.

Instead of Aunt Wu predicting she’d marry a “powerful bender”, he changed it to a “powerful firebender” but then ended that scene with Aunt Wu being wrong about everything so Katara wasn’t sure why Sokka would even change it if he was just going to discredit Aunt Wu anyways.

 He had Zuko save Katara from falling rocks, but instead of her real reply of “Okay, you can get off me now!” Sokka changed it to, “Oh Zuko! You have given me rock hard hope!” Causing everyone to groan and Katara to flick Sokka on the harm.

 Instead of Zuko saying “I’m never happy”, Sokka changed it to “I’m only happy with Katara.” The actor for Zuko had added a dramatic hair flip after he said the line, which had Katara giggling.

 At one point, Sokka had written Zuko singing a song with the phrase, “That’s rough buddy” after each character of Team Avatar revealed something that had happened before Zuko joined the group. Both Zuko and Sokka had shared a glance and a laugh when that happened, though Katara wasn’t sure what the significance was.

 Really, the play was overly dramatic and ridiculous, but it was quite funny, especially if you knew what actually happened and knew Sokka changed it to be lighter than it actually was at the time. It helped Katara think back on those hard days without as much sadness as she normally had when she thought about them.

Nearing the end, Katara was thankful that Sokka had not included Zuko being struck with lightening from his own sister…Katara didn’t know if any of them could handle that, but especially not the members of the Fire Nation Royal Family.

 The closing scene was very ambiguous, which Katara was grateful for. It would make playing it off as a joke much easier.

It ended much how the end of the war had, with Zuko and Aang speaking to the crowd and Suki, Sokka, Toph, and herself holding hands behind them while they finished their song about peace.

The final note ended and the entire theatre blew up in applause and whistles. Eventually, the audience stood up and continued their praise, with Sokka bowing theatrically even though no one knew he had written the play.

Katara politely clapped while she caught Zuko’s eye. He nodded his head at her and she smiled back at him.

As the group descended the stairs from the Royal Booth, they were surrounded by a large crowd of people asking questions. The main one being if Katara and Zuko were a couple. One person even asked if Toph and Aang were a couple, which had both of the young teens blushing furiously.

Zuko’s only comment was that the musical was very well written and he hoped that whoever the playwright was, they had more in store for the Ember Island players.

Katara said the play was dramatic and that the humor was a lot like her brother’s.

The group thought they were in the clear and headed towards the main doors…

until Uncle Iroh stopped Katara in front of the ostrich horses they rode on and very publicly asked her if she would be joining his nephew for dinner tonight, leaving everyone to groan and the reporters to swarm again.

 THE END :)

also, thank you to @clarensjoy for teaching me how to do the “keep reading” thing lol  it helped a lot. 

#zutara #not canon compliant #ember island players #uncle iroh bc i love mr. tea man #make tea not war #atla #gaang #hehe #:) #thanks for the prompt