#no one gets shima like me sorry (by voices in my head)

[mapoeggplant]

skip to loafer chapter 56 analyze + brief shima study // spoilers

summer vacation is over, which means we’re all coming back to tokyo. for some, it’s time to bask in the memories they created, however for others, the harsh reality comes creeping in again.

one thing that i absolutely love about takamatsu’s way of constructing a chapter is how she easily mixes the youth of the characters (the girls talking about crushes) with the obscure subplot she has been creating up to now (shima’s backstory). the change between subjects isn’t harsh or out of place: everything happens in a simple flow, ending in a calm scene to tie it all together.

so, let’s start from the youth: it’s amazing to see how mitsumi was the step that the other three girls needed to finally be free enough to be a teenage girl, something they prevented themselves from being before. she’s the one who manages to ease their worries and let them be free to talk about things teenage girls should be talking about — and they decided to choose one of the cutest subjects ever: crushes!! makoto being the one to bring this subject up just shows how she grew and how much she trusts the girls, since she was always apprehensive to touch on certain subjects. and this talk was the perfect opportunity for mitsumi to get a little more courage to talk about her relationship with shima with the girls, and choosing to do that in tokyo shows how much she cares about shima, since she doesn’t want the girls to think badly about him at any point.

ok, now let’s jump to the subplot, the one that i love to analyze so much. well, we all know that i had a gut feeling that shima didn’t say anything about the trip to his mother — first because we saw nao-chan talking to all the parents, minus shima’s, and second because, by the little we know about shima’s mom, it’s easy to say that she would never allow shima to go there empty handed. so i can’t say that i was surprised by the outcome of the confrontation. 

i think first i have to focus a lot on shima's reaction towards his mother. the scene opens with shima entering his room and noticing that things were not the way that he left before the trip, showing from the beginning a breach of trust. even if his mother had the best of intentions (like, for example, keeping her son's room tidy), it is difficult for shima to understand this act as something affectionate and not as a way of showing that she doesn't trust him.

after that, we have the big showdown. there is no way to defend shima in anyway with the way he acted and what he did. he traveled miles from his mother, without her having any idea about it. this is extremely dangerous, any parent would be desperate to receive news like this after days. i don't blame her, on the contrary: i think she’s more than correct in confronting him about this.

but for shima, this concern doesn't come from a loving side, from a worried mother. shima still sees his mother as that manipulative and controlling person he grew up with and had so many conflicts with, so hearing all of this only a desperate need to get out of this situation as fast as possible. she already broke her son's trust as soon as he entered the house, so it's very easy for him to assume that this is another one of her controlling attitudes.

but there is an interesting point in all this. after the fight, shima begins to reflect on her mother's changes and asks a very important question: am i still mad at her or am i just being stubborn, like a child who expects something in return?

this shows a maturity in his character, as it is the first time he stops to analyze what all this means inside his chest. would it be rebellion? love? distrust? a cry for help?

shima's relationship with his mother is still something that requires a lot of growth and development for it to make a significant change. in my opinion, it won't happen now or in 5 chapters, but much later, something like an ending to shima's arc, a way to embrace all of his growth. it’s as if she represents the beginning and end of his journey.

aside from his mother, now we have two new pieces to this puzzle: the unknown man and a very new image of shima (the image of him walking with other boys, on the panel where he thinks about his feelings towards his mother). what we have left is to have an idea of how many pieces we still need to assemble the final image. what happened? who was responsible? is this the man who ruined it all? or he was just another victim of the circumstances?

(something that is not related to these questions but that made me think was the fact that ririka sent him the photo. could this be a form of provocation or just a way of finding comfort?).

crabs are no longer shima's only concern at the moment. his harsh and difficult reality came back to the surface with full force. and i, who thought we were close to the climax of his arc, am shocked to realize that we are nowhere near halfway there.

to finish: mitsumi's speech about how tokyo is finally being a new home for her. this is something that makes me so happy, that brings me so much peace, especially with nao-chan's happy and relaxed face next to her. tokyo is finally mitsumi's second home, and she's happy to be able to return to it.

another month and another amazing chapter, another reason to be so excited for what's to come. this is takamatsu-sensei's power. thank you for reading me rambling and for all the nice messages you guys have been sending me 💛 it means the world!!

#chapter analyze #skip to loafer #skip and loafer #skip to loafer chapter 56 #chapter 56 analyze #mitsumi iwakura #sousuke shima #feels like I keep getting more unhinged with my analyzes #like you don't have to write all of this girl #calm down #anyways I can't #I love them too much #no one gets shima like me sorry (by voices in my head) #and I'm still stuck in sensei's basement #duckmetas

[frostemeto]

"Shit-" (final)

Character: Kaito, Shima, Elias

Part 3 of "sick" Pls enjoy ^^

Warning ⚠ Sick-gags-cuddles-bad English

--------------------------------------------------

Elias run and get out of the bus, "W-wait! " Said Kaito, Kaito following him, he pull Elias hand and take him to the restroom, Elias run to one toilet and lock the door, Kaito could hear a softly gags noise and the softly vomit noise, "why I'm the one who feels nauseous but you the one who vomit.. ", Kaito sigh, "need help?.. ", said Kaito. " Hmnnn.. -", Elias was still vomiting so he couldn't answer, "what? -", said Kaito. Suddenly Shima came to the restroom. " Kaito-? ", said shima. " Oh- hey shima-"

"What are u doing here? ", Shima hears someone vomiting, " Damn- who's that? -" , Shima asked. "It's lias.. ", said Kaito. " Oh.. He vomited again?.. ", said Shima. Kaito nodding as yes, " Do you need help lias..? "Shima asked with a softly voice. " M-mhm.. ", as a yes. Elias unlocked the door slowly. Shima and Kaito came in. " Jeez- elias- u vomited all your food u just ate 30 minutes ago.. ", said kaito. Kaito rubs his back and Shima held his hair. The brownie hair and the two blonde hair is inside the toilet. " I.. I'm sorry.. ", said Elias. " For what?.. " That two blonde. Answered. "I-..i bothered you guys.. I'm sorry. sorry I'm a burden. I am so stupid.., im-.. I'm sorry.. " Elias's voice was trembled, start to tearing up.

....

"Hey.. It's alright.. Your not a burden.. ", said Shima. "It's not your fault.. It was an accident.. " Said Kaito. "It's fine, okay? Don't blame yourself.. " Shima and Kaito hugs him. A warm hug from Shima and kaito. Made him feel better. And he cleaned up himself and go back to the bus. Elias is end up sitting with them. Elias sit beside the windows, Shima on the middle, and Kaito in other side from Shima (IDK HOW TO TYPE IT MY ENGLISH IS BAD 😭), Elias finally fell asleep in peace. And the bus start to move again. This time, Elias already drinking a medicine. Atleast it help him feel a bit better. What about Kaito? U said he get motion sickness easily?, about him, he already drink a medicine too. So he doesn't really get motion sickness. Elias forehead is start to feel warm. Atleast it's help the fever down. Kaito fever seem already gone. But not 100% sure.

16/24 hours later. Only 8 hours again the arrived to the place that they wanted too!

The sky is getting dark. Almost night time. Elias sleep for 4 hours btw:v, then he awake, "ur awake, how do u feel lias? " Kaito asked. "Better.. *yawns*" Elias yawns was cute. Shima pull Elias closer. "Let me goo..! ", said Elias. " No, your comfy " Said Shima. "Hmpp! I'm not comfy! " Elias mad and try to go from Shima but he can't. "Cmon lias, your comfy. I like it" Said Shima chuckles. "Bro u like lias? -" Kaito said. "Not like that idiot. I had a gf. " Said Shima. Elias leaning to his chest. "Heh. Dumbasses. " Said Shima who Chuckles. "Shut up.. ", he fell asleep again I'm Shima chest bcs it feels warm. " Wanna join? " Said Shima. "If u won't mind it. " He lean to Shima chest too. "It's comfortable on me thoo" Said Shima. They both fell asleep.

Noah take a picture of them and send it to Elijah, her gf. In the text -Look *send pictures*- , Noah send it to Elijah, -Whoa, look like Elias sleep so comfortable. said Elijah -yeah- noah answered.

30 minutes later. Stopped at a restaurant for dinner.

"Oi, wake up" , said noah. That trio is wake up. All the students is get out from the bus, Kaito and Elias is still sleepy:v (yes, they're a sleepy head.) they ordered some food, "How u feel lias?" Kaito asked. "Better, maybe.." Said Elias, he yawns. "That's great if u feel better! I hope the food u eat now doesn't get out again", said Shima. " Mhm" Said Kaito. The food is arrived, and they eat it.

After eating they look around and take some pictures. Elias oh Elias he so dumb. He was started to feel dizzy but he ignored it. HOW STUPID HE IS. after 15 minutes later they go back to the bus and start to way to the hotel. Elias suddenly hugging Shima, "eh? U alright? Ur acting weird " (It's in the bus way to the hotel btw) , "I'm fine. " Elias closes his eyes. Shima put his hand on Elias forehead, "Ayo ur burning up, how do you burning up so fast..! ", Shima a little bit surprised, but cant do anything again because if he give him a medicine he might puke again. " How do you feel? Dizzy? Nauseous? Tired? ", Shima asked because he worried about him, " I'm just tired and dizzy.. Shut up.. " Said Elias that trying to sleep, he think that sleep maybe help. "Tell me if u need anything alright?.. " Said Shima, pulling him closer and hug back, Kaito was talking to Noah beside them, yeah, talking about they're gf Elijah and Lana. Stalking their social media. Elias coughing, and he sit then take some deep breath. "Whoa whoa- u alright? -" Shima asked, "I-im fine.. ", Elias take a deep breath. " S-shima I think.. " Elias voice tremble. "I think what?- what's wrong? Are u going to puke again? -" Shima asked, Elias shakes his head, "I-its hurts-" Elias start to tearing up, "Hey hey what's wrong? " Shima a lil bit panicked, "what's hurts? ", Shima asked, " C-chest-" , he cough, Shima was panicked, "Kaito call Mrs. ***** ! ", Shima said to Kaito, " Huh- why? -" Kaito said, "Just call her! Elias got asthma attack! " Shima said to Kaito, "Shit- wait-", Kaito quickly call the teacher, Noah beside them was help him too " Lias calm down u will made it worse!.. " Said shima, "h-hurts-" Elias crying, and finally that teacher is gave him a inhaler, u know inhaler right? Find it on google if u don't. "Calm down Elias.. Take a deep breath.. ", after 20 minutes later the teacher finally made Elias a lil bit calm down, and she asked if he wanna seat next to his teacher, just in case. But Elias shakes his head as a no, and that's made people look at them, but they go back to their seat again. He so quite after he got asthma attack, but he's not sleep. But he very quite. He doesn't even talk, he just.. Holding shima hand. Shima was very care about him. Elias and Kaito fell asleep on Shima shoulder, on of Shima hand was holding Elias hand, and the other one to Pat Kaito hair, lemme just tell u guys how they look before we continue.

-Shima

He has blonde hair, kind, and he cares about the other. He loves to wear a jacket, his fav color is blue, has brown eyes, with a light skin. Ambivert

-kaito

He has blonde hair to, kinda quite, obsessed with his girlfriend (just like noah), and introvert person actually, get motion sick easily, clingy.

-Elias

Had brown eyes, energetic, doesn't had a girl friend, kind, loves a cat, he doesn't usually get sick, but once he got sick, it would be bad. Ambivert (he will be extrovert if he okay or doesn't had a problem, but he will be a introvert if he sick, or sad, or anything that made him uncomfortable.)

Ok noah and Elijah I told them later. So, Shima was scrolling his phone. Then he think, in the bus, they use a orange smell(?how to type it-), and that made the sickie and the motion sick boy's is uncomfortable, but Kaito doesn't really got motion sick bcs he already take some, anti-motion sick.

22/24 hours later, only 2 hours more and they arrived.

Elias wake up, Shima was eating an Oreo, "do you want some? " Shima asked. "S-sure.. ", said Elias who finally talking again. He takes the Oreo and eat it. And the he drank a chocolate milk. A few minutes later, " W-when will the bus arrived?.. " Elias asked. "About ½ hours more, why did u ask? You ok?" Shima look at him and ask worried, "I'm fine.. " Said Elias, "tell me if you need anything okay..?" Said shima. Elias nodded,

!24/24 later ! They arrived at the hotel

when he got out of the bus, Elias was still holding Shima's hand, but suddenly Elias squatted down, Shima was confused, "Hey, what's wrong?", he asking worried, Elias gagged, and let out a splash of vomit, Shima was surprised, Kaito is take a water from his bag, and gave it to Shima, Kaito was go to the hotel already, because he gonna check in first. " Elias.. Why didn't you tell us..? " Said Shima, "..." He was still feel nauseous, Shima rubs his back. "Here, take a sip.. " Shima said and help him drink the water, then he lean his head down again and he puke again in there, it's was the Oreo he eat before! And the chocolate milk!, it's was a bad combination to eat in a long trip (for me), "i-urh-... I'm done.. " Elias said. "Let's go then.. ", he help Elias to stand up, and carried him, " I can walk.. Put me down.. " Said Elias, "no. I'm gonna carry u " Said Shima, "whatever.. ", he fell asleep on Shima chest,

"Heh, cute.. ~" Said Shima.

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Okay this is the final! Pls give me more inspiration! I need idea 💡

Okay I hope u enjoy it! Goodbye!

Made by @frostysick

#emetophilia #emeto #sick #final #KaitoKyoka #EliasTempest #ShimaTohura

[meli-r]

This is a silly writing I felt inspired to write yesterday as part of a chapter I don't have time to continue. Sorry for the lack of descriptions, I know I'm bad with them and I do too much dialogue. I needed to get this out of my mind somehow xD

*****

Yashiro glided into Shima Seigen's office, the door sliding softly as it closed behind her. The room emanated tranquility, adorned with minimalist decor that seamlessly complemented the serene atmosphere. Shima, wearing a warm and inviting smile, gestured gracefully towards a pair of plush armchairs strategically positioned across a low coffee table.

"Welcome back, Takahashi-san," Shima greeted her with a slight nod of his head. Yashiro, embracing the cultural exchange, responded with a brief yet respectful bow before settling into a chair. The armchairs, adorned with plush cushions, offered an immediate sense of comfort and relaxation.

As they eased into their respective seats, a moment of silence enveloped the room. Yashiro, with one leg elegantly crossed over the other, exuded a poised demeanor. Shima mirrored her posture, conveying professional ease. Their eyes locked, exchanging unspoken understanding, while Yashiro's gaze subtly wandered, immersing itself in the intricacies of the room's architecture.

“My understanding, based on Chief Kasei's report, is that you might have experienced an anxiety attack. Difficulty breathing, is that correct?” Shima Seigen spoke in a calm, measured tone, his voice resonating with gentle assurance. They remained seated in their comfortable chairs, their focused gazes creating a connection within the tranquil space.

“She believes it was an anxiety attack. The recent case turned out negative, and she sent me to you.”

“You disagree with the diagnosis. How are you feeling now?”

“Fine. Back at work.”

“Any insights into why it happened?”

“Stress, maybe.”

“About what?”

“Work,” she said with a shrug.

“We all face work-related stress, but not everyone stops breathing. What did you see that triggered this reaction?”

“There was a woman. She reminded me of my mother.”

“The resemblance triggered that?”

“No. It comforted me.”

“So, what do you think caused that feeling?”

“Something I heard about her and myself. But I've been handling it well.”

“Handling it? So, it's not the first time? Could you share more about your past experiences? Have you identified any patterns or common triggers?”

“I'm not sure. It was different three years ago and certainly six years ago.”

“When your parents passed away. Can you elaborate on how your experiences three and six years ago differed? How did you cope back then compared to now?"

“I don't remember much. It was a long time ago. I was occupied with school, college…”

“Work. Staying busy is a way to distract oneself from distressing feelings.”

“What feelings?”

“Sadness.”

“Everything is a distraction until we die.”

“That sounds like depression talking.”

“This feels like a waste of time for both of us,” Yashiro sighed.

“I don't see it that way. Can you pinpoint when you first noticed these emotions resurfacing?"

“It's been lingering, but it intensifies during moments of silence.”

“How have you traditionally coped? Besides staying busy, have you explored other strategies? Talked to friends?”

“I have many friends and opportunities for friendships.”

“Did you share your feelings with them?”

“Of course not,” she chuckled.

“Do you feel like expressing your thoughts is burdensome or worthless?”

“Sometimes I resent being made a victim.”

“You don't like being called a victim?”

“I don't like victimizing myself or being treated as such. I don't believe problems are solved by playing the victim.”

“You think you're not worthy of attention?”

“I prefer to keep my problems to myself.”

“Did your parents teach you that?”

“What?”

“To belittle your own suffering. Don’t you think that line of thought could have led a young girl to embrace these ideas?"

“I bring this on myself, I know.”

"No. When people come to terms with the fact that they hold the reins to their choices, deeds, and beliefs, and that mortality lurks at every corner, it can be a tidal wave of apprehension. A muted frustration surfaces, steering them towards the conviction that the only undeniable truth is the inevitability of death."

Yashiro frowned and chuckled. “You're not angry with me for lying?”

“Everyone lies to some extent, especially patients.”

“You're not like Chief Kasei.”

“We don't agree on everything.”

“Did she force you to come here?”

“No. However, I'd like to refocus on our conversation. This change in direction doesn't address what's important right now—you.”

“But I have nothing to say about myself,” Yashiro opened her right palm beside her.

“Then tell me about your father.”

“He's dead,” Yashiro’s voice echoed.

Shima watched her in silence before asking, “And how has your family been handling it?”

“What? Him?”

“Your non-relationship with your father. How do they understand it?”

“Wherever they are, it's a mystery to me, and I doubt they're losing any sleep over trying to figure it out.”

“And your mother?”

“He ruled her life.”

“But she wasn't his daughter. What did he do to you?”

“He showed his true colors, that's all. I'm glad he's dead. Not even that. I wished he'd die. I dreamed about it for years. Is that right? Wishing him dead? Does that make me a good daughter?”

“A good daughter?”

“Yes, I mean, bad children…” she waved her hand.

“Bad children what?”

“They should die. It’s a miserable thing to be a bad son. We’re supposed to be better than our creators, not a disgrace,” Yashiro narrowed her eyes and looked away.

“Your parents made it impossible for you to experience joy,” Shima observed, making her frown. “Reflecting on your past experiences, we've discussed the events from six years ago when your parents passed. However, I'm curious about what happened three years ago. Is there a particular event or change in your life during that period that you believe might have contributed to your emotional state or influenced the way you handle stress and sadness?”

Yashiro subtly shifted her posture, adjusting in the seat with quiet grace, remaining silent and contemplative, offering no response.

#psycho pass fanfiction

[gayfanservice]

I Feel Like You're Enjoying My Requests Quite A Lot , Huh .

REQUEST :

Tsukishima , And Yamaguchi Having A Boyfriend , Who's Tall , Calm , But The Nicer Fucker Ever . Like , They're Emotion Dead , But They Also Genuinely Care , Its Quite Hard To Tell Sometimes Though -But , Here's The Twist ; They Have A Deep Ass Voice . Like , Anyone Sees Them , Oh Okay , Its A Tall Guy , Who Seems Rude , But Is Nice , But Blunt , Cool ! He Talks , oH shIT - !

You are like the only person who requests, so yes

*********

You walked towards the gym, ready to see your two boyfriends. Club ended for you and you were about ready to be sandwich between them in a nap pile, but alas, they also have club. You pouted for a second before turning back to your neutral (also known as bitch) face, seeing the gymnasium doors you hurried your speed. You reached the steps and took one large step over them, mentally laughing at yourself for being so tall. You opened the gym doors and walked in, ‘Hm, if I was any taller I’d probably hit my head off that.’ You thought as you stood beside a small blonde girl, seemingly not noticed by anyone. You stood there for a minute or so before Tadashi noticed you and waved, you waved back.

The girl in front of you looked confused as she turned around, freezing in horror as her eyes made contact with your chest. She slowly (it was almost comedic) looked up, making eye contact with you. You waved before looking back at Tadashi, feeling the girl shaking and taking a couple steps away from her. Seeing her still staring at you, in what was most definitely horror, you took another couple steps away from her, hoping it made her feel more comfortable. “HOLY HELL, LOOK AT YOU!” You heard beside you, looking down at the two-toned haired child and feeling the rest of the gym looking at you, “Nishinoya, that’s not how you great people!” You could only assume that was the captain.

“You’re so tall! You’re taller than stingy-shima!” Another small person came up to you, “What was that?” The small person let out a surprised ‘EEP’ at the appearance of Kei behind him, Tadashi beside Kei. “Hi, (Y/N),” Tadashi bumped Kei’s arm with his own. Kei let a sigh, “Hey, (Y/N),” You quirked a small smile, “Hey,” The small red head jumped back, taking a defensive stance. “I’d say I get that reaction a lot, but no one has tried to fight me because of my voice before,” You said as Tadashi laughed, Kei trying his best to hold his in. “IT’S SO DEEP!” The two-toned child clinger to your arm, “CAN YOU PICK ME UP WITH ONE ARM?!” He asked, “Nishinoya!” You shrugged before lifting your arm with ease, his body dangling down.

“YOOOOO!” He kicked his legs a little before Kei spoke up, “I think it’s time to go, don’t you think, Tadashi?” He looked annoyed at the scene, “Yeah,” Tadashi looked more confused then pissed. You let the child off your arm as Tadashi and Kei gathered their stuff to leave, you following out the door and waving to the team before closing the door behind you. “You guys get jealous quite easily, you know that?” You laughed as you took their hands, Tadashi with a red face and Kei looking away (face more red than Tadashi’s), “Shut up,” He mumbled, “Sorry, Tsukki,” He groaned as you heard Tadashi giggling.

*********

Ok but like yes

#haikyuu x male reader #haikyuu x reader #tsukishima x reader #tsukishima kei x reader #tsukishima kei x male reader #tsukishima x male reader #yamaguchi tadashi x male reader #yamaguchi x male reader #yamaguchi tadashi x reader #yamaguchi x reader

[tonguetiedraven]

Prompt: long distance call?

This was actually weirdly hard for me because I really hate talking on the phone xD The moment I have to grab a phone I lose any conversation skills (which aren't many) I had. I need to see the person or I lapse into even more awkward silence. Apparently that extends to writing about the phone too, lol.

Thank you for the prompt, and I hope you enjoy it!

Pairing is Bon/Rin because I can, lol.

— — — — —

You have four new messages and twelve saved messages.

New message:

"Ryuuji! How are you doing, son? Sorry I couldn't call earlier. We got the last of the melons harvested, and your mother wanted you to know when you're coming to dinner. She doesn't care that you're in Italy and—"

"He's got the key! What's the point of those things if he doesn't use them to visit?"

"—and we miss you. Stay safe, son, and don't over work yourself!"

Message saved.

New message:

"Hi Bon!"

"Hi Bon--"

"Shima, give me back the phone!"

*Crash*

"Ow! Koneko, that hurt!"

"Then listen. Bon, we got the papers from the Egyptian branch. We've got Shishamo working on a translation, but—"

"Why didn't you tell us they were cursed, man?!"

"Stop talking! Yeah, uh, they've got some kind of seal on them that no one recognizes. We had to bring in some people from the Vatican--"

"If you see Raphael, tell him to put our stuff on priority—"

"Shima! We'll try and keep you updated about it."

"Talk to ya later, Bon!"

"Stay safe!"

Message saved.

New message.

"Ryuuji! Whatever Redarm tells you, it isn't true. Also, I'm going to need you to send that report to Yang and Liu. I won't be in tomorrow, and if anyone asks... Well, get creative. I didn't do what they say I did. Brooks has no proof. And, uh, maybe let them know I was with you yesterday."

*Laugh*

"On the other hand, I did get that book, so you can finish the research. I'll drop it off tonight. Don't work too late."

Message deleted.

New message:

"Ryuuji! Guess what guess what guess what! I got the gig! I'm going to be in Italy next month! I'm gonna text you the flight info and hotel shit, and if you're not waiting in my room I'm gonna be mad. Don't make me hunt you down. Or—"

*giggle*

"—do. It might be fun. Hmm... anyway. I'm gonna go to sleep. Call me back when you can? I wanna hear you. This voicemail thing sucks. I miss you, babe. "

Message saved.

— — — — —

Bon got up with a stretch and rolled his neck to loosen his muscles. He climbed out of the bed, pulled on his running sweat pants, went to the bathroom to take care of the rest of his morning routine, and pulled out his phone as he blended himself a protein shake.

The phone rang twice before Rin picked it up. "Morning, babe!"

"Hey," Bon pulled the shake off the blender and went to grab his running shoes. "how's lunch?"

"Fantastic 'cause I made it."

"Yeah?" Slipping the shoes on, he put one hand against the wall for balance and pressed the phone between his ear and shoulder to hold it in place. "Describe it for me. I miss your cooking."

Rin laughed and the distance between them felt bigger for a moment. He hadn't seen Rin laugh in ages. They should just video call for this bit. Then he could see Rin's handsome face. Though... though that might just make the ache of longing worse. Not that he imagined it could get worse.

"You know," Rin managed around his laughs, "other couple talk about what they are or aren't wearing."

"I know what you're wearing, Rin, and most couples don't have a cook like you. Your food shouldn't be legal."

"You're just sayin' that." Rin sounded bashful now, and Bon could feel his lips lifting in a smile as he left his apartment and headed towards the trail he ran every moment.

"Nope, I'm really not. Now come one, tell me what fantastic thing you made."

"You're gonna get upset."

Bon pulled out his most indignant voice. "You didn't."

"I couldn't help it! I really missed ya since we didn't get to talk yesterday, and every time I smell it I think of you and I just kinda made it when I wasn't paying attention?"

"How dare you. I'm over here drinking a shitty shake and you're eating curry."

"A protein shake?" Rin immediately sounded unhappy. "You're gonna have something else after your run, right?"

There were a few other runners jogging down the path, but it was nearly empty this morning.

"Yes, Rin." He picked up speed, slowing his response a little as he tried to keep his breathing even. "Same as every day."

"Sweet potatoes?"

"Probably. Still got some of the ones you sent me. Tell me about the curry."

"You shoulda eaten those already. Have you been skipping meals?"

"Thought I was supposed to be the mother hen."

"Ryuuji!" Bon almost tripped at the unexpected shout and had resist the urge to cringe and shrink in on himself. He was going to be in trouble now. "You promised!"

"It's just a few lunches, babe. Just when I got a dead--"

"I'm gonna kill Lewin."

Guilt welled up in his stomach. There was worry in those words. Worry and anger, and it was such a stupid thing, but he knew how much Rin worried about eating habits. Especially after all the shit that happened with Yukio in school.

"It's not like that, promise. I'm getting better, and Lightning's pretty good about pulling me away to eat."

"I'm going to make you enough curry for a year when I get up there."

"I don't have that big of a fridge."

"I'll get you another one."

"I'd like to do more than just watch you cook."

Rin's voice immediately dropped into a way over exaggerated sultry whisper. "Yeah?"

Bon grinned and slowed down.

— — — — —

When his phone rang at seven pm, he was immediately worried. He picked it up before the second dial, pulling the pan off the stove and bringing the phone to his ear with a worried "Rin?"

"I wasn't sure if you'd be up," Rin whispered in the quiet way that made him sound scared. "Can't remember what time it is over there."

"It's seven. Not late at all." It was three in Japan. "Why are you up?"

Rin went quiet for a few minutes, his breathing loud but labored like he'd been gasping a moment ago. "Babe?"

"I slept like shit," he finally muttered. "Uh, some... you know. Dark shit."

Bon turned the stove off. The omusoba could wait. "Yeah? Wanna talk about it?"

Rin sighed and Bon could imagine him pulling a blanket around himself. "Kinda? But not really? I just... it's so damn quiet here."

Bon's heart ached. Rin had never lived by himself before this stupid assignment. It was either Yukio or him, and then Bon had got transferred over here for six months and Rin had been handling the new live alone status like a boss, but it still had to be hard.

"You'll be over here in a few more days, right?" He tried to make his voice reassuring but it was hard to make his voice suffice when all he really wanted was to wrap Rin up in a tight hug.

"I miss you," Rin admitted, "and I know it won't be forever, but I just... I started thinking about if you didn't come back and--"

"I am. I'm coming back in two months. I'm coming back and I won't leave again with out you. Not for this long."

When Rin spoke again he sounded a little happier. "Yeah? Promise?"

Bon didn't hesitate for a second. "Promise. Cross my heart." He leaned against the counter and wished he was closer. "I'm gonna finish setting up that office, and you're gonna make us dinner, I'll do the dishes, you'll make me eat lunch and I'll make sure the laundry is actually folded."

"I'm gonna cuddle you all night."

"You better."

Rin huffed out a breath. "You're still not gonna get me up for your run."

"As long as you're there when I get back, that's okay."

They lapsed into silence for a moment while Bon went to grab the rest of the ingredients for his dinner.

"Can you do the thing for me?"

Bon shut his fridge and wished there was a way to hug through his phone. "Sure thing, babe. Anything in particular you want to hear?"

"Day by day."

Bon closed his eyes and wished Japan wasn't so far away. "Day by day," he murmured, "we magnify thee." He recited the ancient hymn quietly until Rin's snores filtered through the phone.

He left his phone going, listening to the familiar sound until the battery died.

Two more months, and he'd be there to hold Rin after the nightmares. He could hardly wait.

#bonrin #ao no exorcist #blue exorcist #ryuji suguro #my tumblr fics #rin okumura #bon x rin #bon suguro #bonxrin #bon/rin #ryuuji suguro #aoex

[buryyourfavouritestrope]

An Exorcist Dance - Yukio Okumura

Author Note: So this is a break from the Arima, Nobuchika, William and Claude. am I right? I remember first watching Blue Exorcist with my Twin and my god did I fall for that show. It was probably one of my first Anime's. I just read the Manga and Yukio will always be my favourite. Followed by Mephisto and Shiro Fujimoto.

“You’re coming too Yuki?” Shiemi extolled as they made their way through the cram school corridors. Truth be told the younger Okumura had no idea what she was questioning him about and if he hadn’t had a bad feeling in his stomach, he would have said yes there and then. He exhaled as he paused the thoughts that had been distracting him.

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t paying attention” Yukio confessed, he let his hand fall on the back of his neck as he smiled at his student. Anyone else would’ve been fine with it but he saw the disheartened expression that crossed over her features, and if he saw it so had his brother. He felt the impact before he registered it. The harsh thump had ricocheted pain through his arm.

“The exorcist dance, you know sort of like a prom or a ball. Like in one of those nerdy manga books you read” Rin jabbed. Yukio had no intention of attending a dance; he had never attended one voluntarily before, usually he would be working or studying.

“I’m sorry, I’m working on the day of the dance,” He apologised; he felt Shiemi sadden before she turned her attention to Rin.

“You’re coming though Rin; we could go together?” Shiemi raved. She hadn’t noticed the meaning of her words, or the way Rin’s body stiffened, and his blood pooled in his cheeks. Without speaking he nodded. Yukio stifled the laugh that threatened to cause ruckus through the air.

“No fair, I was going to ask you that” Yukio caught the mumbled whine that left Rin as they entered the classroom. He watched as his brother slunk his way into his seat, his pride damaged. The youngest Okumura glanced over the rest of the class; the girls sat off to one side whilst the boys nursed their wounds. It was clear Shima had once again asked Izuku to a dance, and perhaps Bon had asked [Y/N]. No Yukio refused to let that image enter his mind, but he didn’t stop the sense of joy that pricked at his mouth when he took in Bon’s rejected features.

“Well class, today I’ll be giving you back your recent Pharmaceuticals quiz- “Yukio began, his words fell short at the sudden crash. His head shooting towards the source. He watched as Mephisto’s form entered the classroom. This had become more than a common occurrence. For a second, he contemplated that the demon was keeping a particularly close eye on his lessons.

“I’m sure you’re all excited for the coming dance and I just wanted to stop by and inform you that everyone should be in attendance, no excuses.” Mephisto practically sung as he addressed the students. “Even you [Y/n], I’m glad to see your injuries from the recent exorcism have healed nicely.”

Recent injuries. Yukio’s head shot towards her. Worry swarmed the teen as he registered the bandage just peeking out the cuffs of her sleeve. He’d sat in a room with her for hours on end each day and not once had he noticed her wince in pain, nor had he heard about her going out on any exorcisms. She wasn’t cleared for any-

“Mr Okumura,” Mephisto’s voice snapped him clear of his thoughts. “Miss Moriyama informed me you’re working the day of the ball. Everyone is to attend, given how hard you’ve all worked recently, I think you deserve the break as well. Wouldn’t you agree?”

“Uh, yes.” Yukio agreed. He’d let Mephisto win this time.

“I’ll be off then. I declare the cram school cancelled for today, we’ve got a dance to prepare for” Mephisto grinned.

“Don’t forget to grab your tests on your way out” Yukio barked as they all but ran from their seats. He observed them as they went, his eyes moving to the next as they picked through the pile of papers. Until the last left was hers, he watched as she cautiously stood, a brief wince falling across her face. She wasn’t in pain, she just…well he could see her eyes looking everywhere but him. “You got hurt on an exorcism” he croaked.

“If I’d told you Mephisto asked me to go on an exorcism you would’ve asked to join, plus I had Shura supervising me. It’s just the exorcism was in my hometown.” She smiled. She made her way to the front, her hand reaching for the paper. “Anyway Mr Okumura, I don’t think it matters what I do in my free time, considering how our last conversation went.”

This time Yukio winced. He felt the sharp blade of guilt turn in his gut. He called her impulsive and reckless when she stood against Amaimon. If Rin hadn’t caught the Demon’s attention your injuries could have been catastrophic. He felt his harsh shouts echo through the room as though the walls had remembered them.

“I-“He paused, his mouth closing as he looked down.

“If it helps, the anger from that argument helped me kick serious backside on the field. Especially when I was trapped between a rock and a demon. I won’t bore you with the details, I’m sure you’ll find the reports somewhere. Thanks for the test Mr Okumura, I guess I’ll see you at the dance tomorrow.”

Yukio hadn’t slept that night; he hadn’t even been conscious through his training that day as he kept pinging back to her words. He should’ve just told her why he’d been so angry after that incident. Not only had his brother lost control and been taken away in cuffs but his students had been injured. He’d been helpless in that moment caught between the threat and protecting them. He held seniority in that situation with Shura indisposed. Yet he let her antagonise Amaimon, whilst he patched the others up. She’d been hurt because he couldn’t get to his guns quick enough, she’d been both hurt and saved by his brother in the space of a minute.

Yukio stood with his back against a wall as the dance began. He hadn’t registered people trying to gain his attention as he swam in his own thoughts. He hadn’t noticed Rin and Shiemi laughing as they approached him in an attempt to get him to loosen up. To remember that right now he was still a teenager and that even the other Exorcists were letting themselves enjoy the night.

“It takes some level of antisocial to be stood in the dark at a dance.” Her voice had been the only one to ripple against his thoughts. His eyes blinked a few times before he straightened up. He smiled feebly at her. How long had she been stood there? How long had it been since he’d arrived, by the looks of the exhausted crowd it had been a while? The dancefloor had been all but abandoned with only a few remaining people dancing with one another. “Here I got you a drink but then from the looks of the teachers I think Mephisto may have spiked it. I’d give it a pass.”

“That clown” Yukio grumbled. “I’ve been thinking and about the other day. After the whole Amaimon fight. It was wrong of me-“ She stopped him. A hand on his shoulder squeezing firmly.

“Mr Okumura- Yukio its fine. I was angry too; they carted your brother off and Mephisto wouldn’t say anything. I asked him to give you a break and before you get angry, it was my choice. I went on the exorcism in your place. These injuries are my fault. But I’m fine. So fine that I wanted to ask you something. Yukio Okumura, can I have this dance?” She interrupted him. He felt the anger bubble for a while as he let the information sink in. He sighed, his head dropping for a second before he nodded.

“I mean considering all of our classmates have passed out, sure. But really it should be me asking you. At least that’s what I’ve wanted to ask you for a while.” Yukio uttered. He held his hand out to her, his eyes peering at her over his glasses as he smiled. She placed her own hand in his as they stood to the side, there was no need to walk into the spotlight at least he hadn’t felt the need to do that. Instead, he pulled her close to him as the music lulled into a slow melody.

Her head fell against his shoulder as he held her tight, their bodies swaying together. He pulled himself closer to her, his head resting atop hers as his thoughts that had clouded his mind for days evaporated. Right this instance, all he could focus on was her.

“I’m sorry” He whispered; his lips ghosted over the top of her head as he listened to the music. “I wanted to do nothing more than run after you after our conversation, I wanted to apologise and tell you that I was mad because I’d failed as both a teacher and a friend. You were hurt on my watch and I let you put yourself in the line of danger. I was mad because you mean more to me than anything.”

“I waited” Her words fell in line with the rhythm as she lifted her head to look him in the eye. “I waited for a while outside the door. If it helps, I wanted to go back in the room, and both hit you and kiss you. If you failed as a teacher, then I failed as a student.” She smiled. He mirrored her smile. Both becoming aware of just how little space there was between their faces, and just as they felt the breath of the other heavy on their lips; a shriek tore them apart.

“Mr Okumura, seriously. You rejected me for him” Bon’s voice boomed from across the hall. The commotion had caught the attention of most of the other students, bar Shima who had fallen unceremoniously asleep across a few chairs.

#yukio okumura x reader #yukio okumura imagine #blue exorcist imagine #ao no exorcist x reader #Potentially had a bias at the start because I'm too am a younger twin #precious boy needs a hug and also to talk to his brother and or therapist

[reneesi]

i never would have thought // CH.07

WRITTEN PORTION

The clock on the sleek mint green wall of the train station read 10:15. Only 2 minutes had passed since (y/n) had last checked it, never the less at 10:18 her eyes where shifting to read the time once more. (Y/n) wrung her hands together, gaze falling to her feet for what felt like the millionth time. She wasn’t nervous, or more like she wasn’t nervous because of Tsukishima, she was just in a hurry! At least that (y/n) told herself as another wave of fluttering washed through her stomach and up her throat. Her breathing had been weirdly staggered all morning, and though she’d never admit it (y/n) had spent a little too long picking out her outfit. Eventually she had settled on a pastel pink tank top and light wash overalls along with low white socks that had cute lace trimming along the edge. It was simple enough, nothing that seemed as though she had necessarily tried but enough of a difference to elicit an exited “You look really cute today!” from her little cousin Natsu as she was leaving the house.

(Y/n) went through her mental checklist, again, attempting to calm her nerves. If she had forgotten anything she’d have to walk all the way back home to grab it and would probably loose too many daylight hours. Speaking of which she was already falling behind schedule given the fact that Tsukishima had yet to arrive. (Y/n) pulled out her cellphone, reviewing her last three text messages again. It had been nearly half an hour since Tsukishima had sent his simple “Im on my way.” And yet he was no where to be seen.

Sighing, (Y/n) sat on the nearest bench, frustration threatening to consume her. She tried sending another text. She checked the clock once more, 10:20. She sighed.

“This fucker…” she mumbled under her breath, staring at the time on her lock screen. They had agreed on 10 o’clock sharp. Well maybe not “sharp” but it had still been 10-ish as in around 10, not 10 fricking 30. (Y/n) calmed herself yet again, wanting to maintain a positive attitude for the long day that was certainly to come. Five more minutes, she thought. Five more minutes and if he didn’t show she’d call Tsukishima until he picked up the fucking phone.

Five excruciatingly long minutes later, (Y/n) was holding her cellphone to her ear, dial tone ringing its mechanical melody. (Y/n) bit her lip.

“Idiot.” A familiar voice scoffed from behind, as a sideways palm came over her head, hitting her hard enough to elicit an ouch of compliant.

“Why would you call me when I’m right behind you?” He asked, voice even and monotonous as always.

(Y/n) turned to look back at Tsukishima, sending him a glare as she stood.

“Because you’re 25 minutes late!” She accused, pointing an enraged finger at his chest.

“I told you somewhere around 10.” He shrugged, moving past her as he shoved his hands into his pockets.

“Yeah well I thought that meant maybe 10:05 at the latest? What kind of idiot thinks 10:25 is around 10?! Thats around 10:30 more than anything!” (Y/n)’s voice was rising with every word, “And where are you going?!”

Tsukishima stopped and looked back over his shoulder, not an ounce of readable emotion across his face.

“We’re going to miss our train.” He said evenly, before turning back to walk onwards. (Y/n)’s eyes widened and in a scramble she picked up her backpack and stumbled to catch up, boarding the train just after Tsukishima. Once they had settled into seats right by each other he mumbled quietly.

“You wanted to go to the city right? The train leaves at 10:30 so as long as I was here before then everything is okay, right?”

Rosy pink bloomed over (Y/n)’s cheekbones, her head dropping slightly to hide her face. Suddenly she was too close to Tsukishima.

“Y..yeah.” (Y/n) uttered, embarrassment pricking at the tips of her ears as the nerves in her stomach flared.

The two rode in silence for the remainder of the trip, Tsukishima tilting his head to stare away from (y/n) while listening to music though his headphones, and (y/n) sneaking glances every so often at Tsukishima. She argued internally that she was just doing pre-shoot mental plotting. Deciding what poses she’d put him in, what kind of lighting would look good and so on. But it was during these reticent glances that (y/n) noticed Tsukishima’s hair was still damp. A single droplet of water rolled off a strand of shimmering blonde every so often, and with the early light each bead shone like a crystal. Upon further inspection (y/n) concluded he must have taken a shower not long before his departure given the fresh glow of his creamy light skin and the hint of shampoo that hung in the air between them. It was a scent close to laundry detergent and something else she couldn’t quite place, something sharp and intriguing.

(Y/n) felt something strange bubble in her chest, similar to nervousness but different enough to be foreign, and realized she had yet to pull her eyes away. Mentally she thanked the higher powers that Tsukishima had settled down facing away from her and leaned her head back, moving to stare at the ceiling. If not for his position he would have otherwise noticed not only her staring but the hints of pink and red that had failed to leave her face since the beginning of the train ride.

They arrived at the city around 12 PM, (Y/n) complaining loudly at the sheer amount of time “wasted” on the train. She quickly declared their first order of business to be finding a spot with some sort of decent lighting and taking a few preliminary shots to determine the best angles for the shoot. The pair walked around for a while, passing sarcastic jokes and small retorts back and forth. Every time they’d pass a window, on of them would make some sort of judgment call about whatever was being displayed and in the turn the other would jump in to defend said item.

“I just don’t see how you could hate a hat so much! It’s got flowers!” (Y/n) explained, mouth wide and aghast

“It looks tacky.” Tsukishima shrugged, (y/n) shook her head tragically

“Oh Sucky-shima, when will you learn the true beauties of this world.” She sighed drastically, Tsukishima snorted in response

“You’re the one who said that strawberry shortcake looked soggy, which was just factually incorrect.” He threw back, side eyeing (y/n) with a raised brow

“It did not look appetizing.”

“You just have no taste.”

“I don’t dislike strawberry shortcake! There’s just better out there, and I am a person of taste” (Y/n) defended.

“Plus I could probably make a better one.” She finally added, after a long beat of silence. Tsukishima looked like he had something to say but ultimatley didn’t reply, instead he simply rolled his eyes and continued in silence.

Eventually the two came across a fairly empty park and settled into a well lit corner of the greenery. (Y/n)’s camera flickered on and after some button pushes and general adjustments she looked up, half expecting Tsukishima to be in some sort of position. But to nobodies surprise but her own, Tsukishima only stood a couple feet away looking around awkwardly. (Y/n)’s breath caught in her throat as she considered going over and positioning him herself, only to realize that would require touching him which might make things even more awkward than they already where. Because even for all the friendly banter they’d grown to take comfort in, they were still barely good friends and a thick layer of discomfort was very much present between the two.

“H-how do you want me to stand?” Tsukishima asked after one two many moments of silence had passed. It was difficult to tell due to the harsh light and hot weather but (Y/n) could have almost sworn Tsukishima was beginning to develop a soft blush atop his cheeks.

“U-um, why don’t we start with some sitting one! Like on that bench!” (Y/n) pointed, giggling forcibly at the end of her sentence. She cringed inwardly. Tsukishima only nodded, walking over and taking a seat on the bench she had selected.

(Y/n) took a deep breath, it was always weird in the beginning. She always felt awkward at first, so this was no different. All she had to do was get into a groove and she’d be in her element in no time. Then everything would stop feeling so suffocatingly weird.

“Okay, um, don’t move just maybe rest your arms on the top behind you and put that leg over the other, wait not like that I mean-“ (Y/n) blushed, resisting the urge to cover up her face with her hands. Tsukishima looked up at her, confused.

“Just, sorry, just sit however makes you comfortable and try to um relax.” (Y/n) finally sputtered out, sighing as she brought the lens up and squinted. This was going to be harder than she thought.

The first couples shots were tense and really REALLY awkwardly positioned. Tsukishima looked like a broken store mannequin that was being held at gunpoint. But once he noticed (y/n) had started to relax, Tsukishima began joking around again, throwing insults and light criticisms at her in a playful way that felt comforting to their dynamic. Once (Y/n) started laughing again, the ice began to melt and Tsukishima was able to produce a much more normal looking pose. After a half hour of shooting like this (Y/n) stopped and plopped down beside Tsukishima, leaning back into the bench. She began to swiftly click through the images, deleting most of them.

“What was the point of that if you’re just gonna delete them?” Tsukishima asked, furrowing his brows in annoyance “Now I’m gonna have to do all that work again.”

“Relax, that wasn’t the actual shoot. I was getting some test shots to see what exactly I wanted and also what you’d be comfortable doing.” (Y/n) explained, pausing on an image of Tsukishima with his head back, a smile barely visible but never the less present. She smiled to herself, moving on to the next picture without deleting it.

“Since clearly you don’t like to smile for the camera we’re gonna do a stylized phtoshoot so your facial expression doesn’t hinder the process.” She continued, emphasizing the last bit in a sarcastic tone.

Tsukishima rolled his eyes,

“Whatever, let’s just get this over with.” He sighed, melting back to lay against the bench in a half seated half slipping off sort of way.

The next couple hours were long, to say the least. (Y/n) barked orders from afar at an increasingly annoyed Tsukishima, as the day grew hotter and brighter forcing the pair to change the spot they had settled into. The stances Tsukishima took only really worked half the time, since he was mostly too tense or couldn’t figure out the desired posing from (y/n)’s words alone. Regardless, (Y/n) refused to go over and physically put him in position in fear of accidentally ruining the easy atmosphere they had finally achieved. And as they trudged on, the heat began to wear them down, gathering sticky sweat across their foreheads which dripped down to their chests which fueled their matching exhaustion.

Eventually Tsukishima came to a halt

“Okay, enough.” He ran a hand across his forehead “We need to take a break.”

(Y/n) considered arguing but as she felt another bead of sweat roll down the back of neck she decided that maybe just this once, she’d have to listen to Tsukishima.

“This shit is no joke, now I understand why people get payed to do it.” Tsukishima huffed, collapsing back onto the bench they had initially sat in, which had now come to be in the shade. (Y/n) tossed him a water bottle from her backpack and sat beside him, popping the cap off and guzzling the cold down her throat. The refreshment of the cool liquid was unparalleled, and as she drank (Y/n) felt streams of water slipping down her chin. She exhaled, wiping at the wetness with the back of her hand.

“Yeah, it usually isn’t this hot though.” She remarked, shooting Tsukishima a look of apology before leaning back to let her head fall off the edge of the bench.

“Had Tsukishima been blushing just now? No, it had to be the heat.” She pondered internally, staring up and enjoying the way the tree’s leaves moved in soft tandem with the wind, streams of light breaking through the shrubbery.

“You said you needed something interesting, right?” Tsukishima asked a few minutes later

“For the photoshoot?” (Y/n) asked, pulling herself back up to sit upright while turning to look over at Tsukishima

“Yeah, I had an idea.” He began

(Y/n) tilted her head expectantly.

“What if we used the water, from the water bottle? You could probably create a cool effect with that right?” He suggested, holding up his half empty water bottle. (Y/n) narrowed her eyes, thinking for a moment

“That… could actually work.” She pipped up, energy returning in a burst “Wait! I think I have an idea.”

(Y/n) scooped up her camera, fiddling with the settings as she looked around for a spot to shoot. In the blur of excitement she took a hold of Tsukishima’s wrist and dragged him into position.

“I’m coming, I’m coming, jeez.” He grumbled clearly annoyed, not attempting to pull his hand away despite this. (Y/n) released his hand and began adjusting his shirt, and it was then that she realized just how touchy she’d suddenly become. She peeked up at him and this time he was definitely blushing. Her own cheeks flared and (Y/n) jumped back, vision hazy with embarrassment.

“S-sorry! I didn’t even-“

“It’s fine.” Tsukishima scoffed, looking away to avoiding her eyes “It’s just part of the job right?” He shrugged, feigning indifference that was clearly contradicted by the red on his face.

(Y/n) bonked herself internally, he was probably so embarrassed and uncomfortable. She stood farther away but positioned him physically none the less, making sure to only touch him if absolutely necessary. As she set up the exact shot she wanted, (Y/n) mumbled little apologies in between, biting her cheek to calm the raging nervousness at the pit of her stomach that only worsened with every touch.

Eventually they were able to get a picture that (y/n) deemed presentable and the pair moved on to the rest of the portfolio, since the major piece had been accomplished. The two first years ended up staying out until the sun began to set, partially because they kept pausing to banter in between each click of the shutter but mostly because (y/n) couldn’t help but to stop and stare through the lens every so often, making some snarky remark to hide the way her breath caught behind the camera.

Orange light swallowed the tile and columns all around, painting the empty train station (Y/n) and Tsukishima had come sit in in a soft gold hue. The sound of wind and far away trains whirred in the distance and the weather had cooled to a comfortable warmth, the kind felt by a fireplace in the dead of winter when snow falls on eyelashes and the air smells like sugar cookies. A gentle warm, like that of a blanket.

The sticky sweet vanilla dripped onto the floor beneath her and (y/n) licked at her ice cream bar, hoping to catch the next drop with her tongue instead.

“Thanks for helping me out today.” (Y/n) finally mumbled, eyes fixated on the barely visable pink tinted clouds that lay in the far away sky. She could feel Tsukishima next to her, radiating subtle warmth which was sort of strange since he was always so cold, not just to her but to everyone. It was hard not to think so much about him, when he was only centimeters away.

(Y/n)’s mind wandered back to her slip up and suddenly she remembered the feel of his wrist in her hand, and another wave of hot brushed over her face. His skin had been… soft. She peeked over at his hand, the free one that lay in the space between them and wasn’t holding up an ice cream bar. She’d never really been one to pay attention to such trivial details, but now that she knew what his skin felt like, (y/n) couldn’t help but wonder if his hands were just as soft.. how his long slender fingers would feel wrapped around her own.. what his palm would feel like against her cheek-

“Yeah, no problem.” His response was like a snap back to reality, and although Tsukishima hadn’t noticed the way (y/n) had been staring longingly at his hand her blush still deepened as she lowered her gaze back to her feet.

In the end, (y/n) got ice cream on her overalls and a pestering poke to the cheek from Tsukishima.

“Don’t zone out while you’re eating ice cream, idiot.” He’d sneered, causing (y/n) to slap his hand away in protest. The two had argued back and forth before eventually boarding the train and much like that morning, had rode home in silence. When they had arrived back home, there had been only a slight pause on Tsukishima’s part before the two had exchanged goodbyes and parted ways. In that moment before their departures, Tsukishima had looked confused, almost as if he’d been trying to figure out his next play in a long game of chess, but a look like that only had a lifespan of about 5 seconds on a face like Tsukishima’s. (Y/n) sighed in exasperation, throwing her head back to stare at the stars as she walked, she never could read Tsukishima… So what the hell had he been thinking?

CH.07 II you owe me

A/N: Hi, i am SO SORRY! I really was trying to stick to the uploading schedule and then i just got absolutely hit by life. Last weekend was kind of really crazy and i knew i had a big chapter planned so i didn’t wanna sacrifice the chapter in order to release something earlier :/ Then yesterday I was still trying to finish up this chapter and it kind of all snowballed together. To stay on schedule Im gonna double upload wednesday since i still owe you guys another chapter. I hope this one sort of makes up for the lateness, since this is the first REALLY long one in terms of ss and writing! Again, i’m really REALLY SORRY :(( But i hope you guys enjoy!!! 

The picture of Tsukishima from the photoshoot with the water bottle is FANART and nOT MINE, it belongs to @unico_ts on twitter!! All credit is her’s!! Go check her out, her fanart is DIVINE <3

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#haikyuu #tsukishima x reader #haikyuu smau #tsukishima imagine #haikyuu!! #hq #hq!! #hq x reader #haikyuu tsukishima #hq x y/n #hq smau #tsukishima #Tsukishima Kei #tsuki #tsukishima x y/n #tsukishima smau #tsukishima fluff #tsukishima texts #haikyuu fanfiction #hq fanfiction #tsukishima fanfiction #fanfic #twitter au #haikyuu twitter au

[kiribakuficrecs]

hi!! i’m kinda sad rn, can you rec any really sweet, fluffy fics? hurt/comfort maybe too if possible?

hello there!! i’m so sorry you’re feeling sad, here are some of my favorite fluffy fics and hurt/comfort stories that come to mind

cotton candy hands by chonideno

Studying to become a hero requires knowing how to take care of yourself. Sometimes you might need help on the way so if your crush offers to do your hair for you or to give you a well-deserved back rub, it'd be stupid to say no.

A series of soft vignettes in which a love-struck Kirishima and a touch-starved Bakugou care for each other and it's definitely not making their hearts jump through hoops, they’re never this close to kissing, no, they're totally best friends bro

get tough, straight up by qactus

Then again, Kirishima never had this Bakugou Katsuki thing under control—probably everyone's known that, too.

what we deserve by aloera

“Never have I ever met my soulmate,” Uraraka says.

Katsuki freezes. Around the circle, a few people take their drinks. Deku and Todoroki both smile softly before sipping. Yaomomo and Kyouka grin and clink their drinks together, before sipping at the same time. It’s so fucking stupid, this is a dumbass game and he could most definitely lie and nobody would even know–

Drunk Katsuki takes a sip and the room goes silent. At his side, Eijirou goes rigid.

“Sorry, Katsuki, what?”

“Oh boy,” Mina whistles.

in which nobody has ever taught Katsuki that the foundation of most healthy relationships is not, in fact, weapons-grade emotional repression.

cranky-shima by purplepersnickety

"Oh, I just fell out of bed," Kirishima said, almost airily. He put one hand to the back of his neck. "But I'm good."

Katsuki squinted at him. "No you're not."

Kirishima's expression fell, and he looked down at the hand not on his neck. His fingers were trembling and he closed his hand up into a fist. "No, I'm not. Fuck it."

the knock-on effect by kiritime

Katsuki hated the sound of a knock.

From parents on his bedroom door to extras trying to coax him out - it all meant invasion of his fucking space.

Until it came from the other side of the wall. That knock? The opposite of unwanted company. It meant Kirishima was who wanted him.

-

red - im jus knocking

you - just knocking?

red - for when u dont want to talk to anyone

There was another knock, one that somehow sounded happy? It was upbeat at the least.

red - ill jus knock! red - n all u need to do is knock back so i kno ur ok

we’re a good match, so let’s start a fire by claus_lucas

Kirishima thought he’d mess with this guy by pretending to help him hunt down a dragon, but at this point Kirishima really likes Bakugou and doesn’t know how to admit that he is the dragon.

Maybe if Kirishima can get Bakugou to like him back enough, he won’t be told to fuck off forever.

shattered by toshichan

The hardest of rocks can break, the strongest crystal can shatter.

Still, nobody thought that Kirishima of all people, could be hurt in such a way.

easy now, with my heart (careful now, with my head) by multiclassmaps

Between kissing in the woods and arguing where others could hear, the only real surprise is how long it took everyone to figure it out. - “'Course there's nothing to worry about,” Bakugou grumbled, voice low. “You're here, right?”

an obvious patch by sweetsentences

In which Kirishima is hurt, Bakugo is stressed, and everything is going to be okay.

if i offer you my hand, will you take it? by bleukitsune

“Why?”

Kirishima leaned back on his hands, trying to create some space between them. Too close. The ash-blond looked really nervous, his usually arrogant and cunning demeanor gone.

“What do you see when you look at me?”

Kirishima is worried. Bakugou is hurting. After his confrontation with Midoriya, he finally reaches out to him.

help me get out of my head by popcap

“Don’t let go." "Deal."

when you’re in love with your boyfriend by ellieb3an

... and you live in different cities.

5 times Eijirou wished he and his boyfriend lived in the same city, plus 1 time they fixed that problem.

cold in the hands you left me by poetic_leopard

Bakugou forces his gaze level with Kirishima’s eyes—and he’s never been looked at so softly. Bakugou is not soft. If anything, he’s blood spat on concrete.

[or: it's been a month since bakugou's kidnapping & consecutive rescue, but he's still having nightmares. a series of 5 anxiety-peppered, surreal nights where kirishima's the only thing bakugou can allow himself to hold onto].

i also have alot more fics tagged under both hurt/comfort and fluff if you wanna check those out too! i hope you feel better soon and that these helped a lil ♡

#kiribaku #kiribaku fic rec #masterlist #fluff #hurt/comfort #fic help

[mono-dot-jpeg]

fries and milkshakes - k. tsukishima

Summary: A salty volleyball player and a pro gamer walk into a room, so many insults were made that day.

Word Count: 1.8k

Genre: Fluff, Enemies to Lovers, Pro Gamer! Reader, Open Ended (?) 

Pairing: Tsukishima Kei x Reader

a/n: purely a self indulgent fanfic bc salty shima is growing on my best friend :))) follow them if you haven’t >:(((( @mangobangi​ also a very fun quote was put in here from them as well skjdksjdk

"Waa~ the season is over! Thank god. I don't have to worry about practicing with Heesu!" You sighed blissfully. Now you weren't a pro at what would be called normal sports but you were definitely a pro at gaming.

You were (streamer/name), one of the pro players of Philadelphia Fusion from the Overwatch League. You were known for being one of the first females to join Overwatch League. It was a bumpy ride but you made it far. But now you had your studies to focus on. While you weren't in the official line up (due to how young you were), you practiced hard with the benched players and streamed in your free time with your fellow teammates.

You arrived at Karasuno, it wasn't a new day for you. A pretty normal day, except you were transferring into a higher class so that was pretty new. You get to Class 1-4, entering hesitantly.

"Ah, you must be the new student! Introduce yourself!"

"Morning, I'm y/n l/n! Please call me y/n! Nice to meet you!" You bowed as you introduced yourself, you ended up having to sit next to a tall blonde named Tsukishima Kei. Soon it was free time/study hall.

Some students had come up to you as they seemed to recognize you from your streams. You never minded the attention and you just hoped it never got too bad. "Are you really s/n?"

"I prefer not to talk about it too much.." You laughed nervously.

"Wow! You're in like the top 50 in the Asia and American servers!" You rubbed the back of your neck sheepishly. You were never one to brag about your achievements. It was all just a video game to you in the end but then again, you were gonna be in Overwatch League when you get out of high school.

"She can reach top 50 and yet her height says she can barely reach the middle shelf." You turned to look at the tall male.

"Well, that's not very nice, Tsukishima-kun." You tell him. "And if you're gonna insult me, make up something better. I've dealt with years of misogyny in the gaming world, fight me." You have an annoyed glint in your eye as he glares at you.

"Oh my bad, chibi-chan." You were walking right into his trap and you didn't even realize it. "At least I'm in the starting line up on my team." He snickered. He knew very well that you were part of the Philly Fusion and you knew he was in the volleyball team. He knew of a few ways to push your buttons.

"H-Hey! I'll be in the starting line up soon! Just you wait! I'll be at the top!" You huffed. "You'll see me with the big boys, you salty beanpole of a guy!"

"Beanpole? Is that really the best you could come up with?"

"I could come up with worse but I don't think you could handle the heat. What with your petty insults and all." You crossed your arms. "At least I'm at the top with the best."

“Tch, what insults could you come up with, chibi-chan?” He scoffed. Everyone can feel the tension rise between you both. Luckily, a fight didn’t happen due to the fact that the bell had rung. While you and Tsukishima were frustrated at the sound of the bell, Yamaguchi seemed very relieved. 

It’s been several days since you got transferred to Class 1-4. You made a decent amount of friends in the class (though you weren’t sure if someone of them wanted to be genuinely friends with you or they just wanted to meet your teammates). You were really good friends with Yamaguchi, although you still didn’t like Tsukishima enough to want to be his friend. More often than not, you both spat insults at each other with no remorse. It seemed to be a mutual thing, neither of you wanted to be friends nor plan on it. 

You went to see volleyball practice pretty often as to support Yamaguchi (though Tsukki joked a lot that you were obsessed at continuing the feud you and Tsukishima had). “Hey Yama-kun.” You weren’t as energetic as it was getting close to league season and that meant less time with hanging out with friends.

“Are you okay, y/n-chan?” he asked as he was rubbing the sweat off his face with his towel.

“It’s almost league season for me, which mean I won’t spend as much time here. I’ll be home earlier to practice with my team.” You often practiced in your free time when it was off-season but the coach always thought it was better for you to practice with the team even if you weren’t gonna be in the line up.

“You really have to practice even if you’re not in the lineup?” Tsukishima scoffed.

“At least I’m passionate about what I do! You barely put energy into yourself playing!” You snapped back at him.

“Whatever..” He muttered.

“Sorry about Tsukki..” Yamaguchi said. “So, you’re gonna be really busy now, huh?”

“Yeah, I’m gonna be going back to the Fusion base since they might want me to train over there.” That struck a cord in the duo.

“You’re gonna be leaving?” Yamaguchi asked, shocked.

“Yeah. But it won’t be forever. But they know it would be better for me if I went back to school around the Fusion base so it would be easier for me.” You ruffled your hair in slight frustration. “So funny enough, this is my first and last year here.” You sighed. Tsukishima didn’t know what to say. Nor did he realize what feeling were stirring up inside of him. But they didn’t feel good.

“That sucks, but you’re gonna get close to your dream, right?” The green haired male asked. “I’m glad you’ll get the dream you wanted but we’ll miss you when you leave.” He smiled sadly.

“Saltyshima won’t miss me though but I appreciate that you will.” You smiled at Yamaguchi while said male scoffed at your statement. “Let’s just have fun for these last few day before I leave.”

“Eh? You’re leaving that soon?”

“In 3 days actually. On Saturday.” 

D-1

You already felt yourself missing everything in this school. While Tsukishima is struggling to think about what were these dumb feelings doing to him. Why was he feeling this way? Why was it always towards you? Why were these feelings even existing?

“Okay, Tsukishima-kun. Yamaguchi and I made a promise. I have to try and get along with you before I leave to go back. So, let’s start over.” You stuck his hand out. He doesn’t shake your hand and scoffs.

“Like I wanna be friends with you, chibi-chan.”

“Okay, let’s go out to eat then. I’m not taking no for an answer.”

“How about ‘I decline’?” He says back.

“It’ll just be for 30 mins after practice. You can handle that right, Tsukki?” You say almost mockingly.

“Fine.” He huffed. And so started the adventure of the salty male and the pro gamer. After practice both of you headed off to a small diner. “Wow, very fancy.” He says sarcastically.

“Hey, my mom won’t let me in on the money from Overwatch League, give me a break.” You ordered fries and a milkshake. He ordered the same thing as he didn’t seem to care for anything else on the menu. You held up a fry close to his mouth. “Look it’s you.” Before you could move your hand back to eat the fry, he moves closer and eats the fry, his lips just grazing your fingers. “Hey! You have your own sets of fries, Saltyshima!”

“Never said I couldn’t eat your fries though, chibi-chan.” He smirked smugly. How were you gonna get along with the male if he acted like this? You don’t know. You sip on your strawberry milkshake as you glare at him.

D-2

“You’re telling me, you haven’t dipped your fries in a milkshake before?! You’ve got to be kidding me.” You huffed. “Well, now you gotta try it, right now. Do it.” You crossed your arms as you waited for him to do it. You and Tsukishima had unknowingly made a routine between each other which was fries and a milkshake after practice or after school.

“No way.”

“Do it, you coward.” You dip your fry into your milkshake and eat it. “Don’t knock it until you try it.”

“If I do it, will you stop annoying me?”

“You and I both know, I’d still annoy you. Just do it.” He rolled his eyes at your statement before finally trying a fry dipped in the milkshake. “So?”

“It’s not that bad.”

“See! I’m such an intellectual!”

“How are you in my class again?”

D-3

“So...this is the last time we do this. Then I leave.” You were a little gloomy since you and Tsukishima seemed to finally get along, only to probably forget each other in the long run.

“You act like you’re leaving forever. You’ll come back when the season ends, right?”

“I..don’t know yet.” You sighed as you stirred your milkshake with your straw. “You’ll wait for me right? If I come back.”

“When you come back. Don’t say if.” You laughed a bit, but it was a bitter laugh.

“I never thought we’d somewhat get along and when we do, I have to leave for Overwatch League.” You muttered. “Why don’t you come and say goodbye to me when I get to the airport? My aunt is driving me, Yama-kun knows where I live, come with us.” You offered.

“Maybe.”

“Well, let’s not make this our last goodbye right?” You said softly.

Leaving Day

You took a deep breath. Yamaguchi is sitting beside you as he notices the sad look on your face. Tsukishima didn’t come with you to say goodbye. “I’m sure he’ll show up.” He said, trying to be optimistic.

“I don’t know, Yamaguchi...” You mumble. You finally arrive at the airport. “I’ll miss you. I’ll try to text and call as much as I can.” You give him a sad smile. You hug him as he hugs you back.

“I’ll see you soon.” He smiled. You grab your suitcase slowly starting to leave.

“Oh, chibi-chan, you think you can escape from me that easily?” You hear a familiar voice and look up, seeing Tsukishima. Yamaguchi seem to have to take that as a sign to give you and him some space.

“You came after all.” You smiled. He patted your head before pushing you back, chuckling.

“Who do you think I am, chibi-chan?”

“Well, say your goodbyes now. I got to go soon.”

“Right. We got off the wrong foot in the beginning. I will admit that. But within the last 3 days, I tolerate you.”

“Wow, you tolerate me. That’s better than before.”

“Let me finish. I will wait for you. I...don’t just tolerate you. I like you.” His face is dusted with pink, making you hold back a smile and a tease. He took a step closer and kissed your forehead, surprising you. “Take that as my goodbye. Don’t forget to text me when you land, idiot.”

“I won’t forget, beanpole.”

“Shortstack.”

“Lamppost.”

“Gremiln.”

“Salty fries.”

“Sweet milkshake.”

“When you get back, you better buy me fries and a milkshake.”

“I haven’t even left.”

“Well, hurry, so you can come back quickly.”

“I like you too, Saltyshima!” 

#haikyuu!! #haikyū!! #haikyuu+x+reader #haikyuu fanfic #haikyuu fanfiction #haikyuu tsukishima #tsukishima kei #kei tsukishima #tsukishima x reader #kei tsukishima x reader #kei x reader #haikyuu kei #haikyuu kei x reader #haikyuu kei tsukishima x reader #haikyuu tsukishima x reader

[ibelieveinahappilyeverafter]

Writing Commission - Where I Want To Be - Chapter Nine (END)

Summary: Yamada Hizashi, better known as the Voice Hero Present Mic, is a busy man. He has classes and students to teach English to, an agency that always seemed to be in the middle of a disaster to help deal with, and a radio station that was one bad show away from being cancelled to run. He doesn’t have time for a bad day triggered by nightmares and fears and anxieties that just never seem to stop.

Luckily for him, his partners are Aizawa Shouta and Yagi Toshinori and neither of those two are very good at leaving Hizashi to suffer alone.

Fandom: Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia    

Relationship: Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic/Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic/Yagi Toshinori | All Might, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead/Yagi Toshinori | All Might

Characters: Yamada Hizashi | Present Mic, Aizawa Shouta | Eraserhead, Yagi Toshinori | All Might

Rating: Teen Audiences

Word Count: 29,323

Transaction Amount: $200 (USD)

WARNINGS FOR: Past childhood abuse (both emotional and physical) and anxiety attacks verging on panic to PTSD episodes. Please read with caution if needed.

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                                      Chapter Index

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Hizashi gave a soft sigh, stomach pleasantly full and thoughts cloudy and murky as he felt sleepiness tug at him from all sides. It was hard to resist the urge to just give in considering he was curled up on the couch between an equally sleepy Toshinori and Shouta, all three of them curled under blankets. Their bowls and cups were empty on the table, dinner long since done, and Hizashi felt like he could give in and purr like their cats at how warm and content he felt. 

Toshinori was the first one to shift, looking up at Hizashi with bleary, but worried eyes, “How are you feeling, sweetheart?” If Hizashi thought his partners had been worried at the start of the day, it was nothing as to when he had finally gotten home and had been smothered in love and attention for the rest of the night. 

“Honestly? Like I could sleep for a couple of years, at least,” Hizashi said, smothering a yawn against Shouta’s shoulder, who gave a quiet chuckle. “Sorry you had to deal with all of that today, Toshi-”

“No apologies,” Toshinori cut off, giving him a stern look. “We all have our bad days, and I know you would do the same as I did today.” The man paused, face twitching towards amusement. “Actually, knowing you, you would go overboard with it.”

“He would and he will,” Shouta snorted, easily betraying Hizashi and the years of trust and love they had. Shouta at least softened the blow by moving to wrap an arm low around his waist, kissing at the edge of his jaw. “It always helps, though.”

The three lapsed back into silence, Hizashi closing his eyes for a moment as he listened to the soft sounds of their shifting and breathing. It felt like both a second and an eternity before he tilted his head towards Toshinori, resting against him with a soft sigh before he spoke, “It happened when I was a kid, but it was stopped by the time I got to U.A.” 

Shouta was still and quiet, but Hizashi felt Toshinori twitch against him before he was speaking, “You don’t have to explain anything to me, sweetheart, but I’ll gladly listen if you want to share.” God, Hizashi had gotten so fucking lucky when it came to the men he loved. 

“I know I don’t have to explain anything,” Hizashi said quietly, eyes fluttering shut and staying that way. Curled up between the two men he loved, he didn’t see the memories he loathed when he closed his eyes. He saw just them, warm and content and curled up together on the couch. “Besides, I don’t think I have to explain much to you. You probably already have most of it figured out, but to make a long story short… I had a villain’s quirk.”

“You had what they called a villains quirk,” Shouta said firmly, hugging Hizashi closer. “You’ve never had a villain’s quirk, ‘Zashi, because you’d never be a villain.” 

“Hey, now, I think I’d make a pretty decent villain,” Hizashi pouted, letting himself be tugged away from his memories as Shouta gave a sharp snort of laughter. “Hey, hey, I could be evil! I could be terrifying!”

“You’d start bar fights and still try to get cats out of trees,” Shouta shot back and, well… Hizashi wished he could say the man was wrong, but he probably would be like that as a ‘villain.’ “A nuisance at worst, but never evil.”

Hizashi grumbled before opening his eyes and turning back to look at Toshinori, who was looking at him with a soft smile. Hizashi couldn’t resist the urge to lean up and give him a soft kiss before he continued, “Right. Before Shouta so rudely interrupted, I had a quirk that they were afraid of. You’ve probably heard the stories, by now, yeah? Blew out the hearing of everyone in the delivery room when I was first born?”

“You’ve had your quirk since birth?” Toshinori blinked, looking surprised. “Huh. I’m afraid to say that I didn’t know that. Has your quirk always been this powerful, then?”

“Oh- Well.” Hizashi sat up, already recalling what he could remember about quirk theory and everything he had learned and looked up. “It’s actually pretty interesting! You see-”

“Off track,” Shouta interrupted, and, right. Hizashi could geek out about quirks and quirk theory later. Toshinori was stuck with them, after all, so it wasn’t like he could easily escape even if he wanted to.

“Right, right. Okay, so I had a quirk they were scared of that was pretty powerful, and, well…” Hizashi trailed off, giving a nervous shrug and a smile to match it. “What kid can perfectly control their quirk when they’re that young?”

Toshinori sighed, something old and deep as he hugged Hizashi closer, lips pressing against his cheek, “And so they forced control upon you themselves.”

“That’s the short of it,” Hizashi agreed, curling in closer and smiling when he felt one of Shouta’s hands lace their fingers together. “Kid with a voice quirk that’s activated by opening his mouth. I think it’s pretty obvious what happened from there.” It made him think of Shinsou and how the kid knew sign language so fluently all while having a voice-activated quirk that could control someone’s mind. He’d have to remember to see if he couldn’t find out more about the kid’s home life; just to be safe. “They made sure my mouth didn’t open.”

Toshinori nodded grimly, Hizashi sighing and continuing, “It’s not… When I have a bad day, like I did today, it’s usually not too bad these days. It’s phantom sensations for the first half of the day and then, when that’s over, it’s just words and memories that don’t matter anymore.��� 

“If they still hurt you, then they matter,” Toshinori said softly, reaching a hand up to brush against Hizashi’s cheek. “They matter a hell of a lot. Is there any way to prevent these days from being too hard on you?” 

“Nah.” Hizashi shook his head, settling back in and reaching the perfect position for the utmost comfort. “These kinds of days don’t really… build, you know? They just sort of happen.” He wished there was build up and signs that let him know when to prepare for a day of hell, but, as of yet, there hadn’t been much way to tell until he woke up panting from a nightmare. The best they could figure was that stress could make them more frequent, and that wasn’t much to go on. “They’re sure as hell not easy, but I’ve learned to deal with them.”

“There is that, at least,” Toshinori laughed softly, relaxing more against him with a soft sigh, content to just rest in the quiet the three of them had made.

It was a quiet that Hizashi was all too happy to rest in, peeking his eyes open to see Shouta looked to have already fallen asleep. The man was slumped against the couch, body limp and mouth cracked open as he made soft snuffling sounds in his sleep. It was adorable enough that Hizashi didn’t bother fighting against the urge to take a couple of pictures once he dug his phone out, only stopping when he noticed he had messages waiting for him.

The most recent was from Nemuri, a quick, ‘Hey, we’re going out drinking this weekend. Don’t tell Shouta so we can kidnap him.’ The messages before were her typical check-ins and picture spams all designed to make him, if not at least feel better, than distract him from his thoughts.

The next messages were from Tensei, his typical nightly check-ins to make sure Hizashi wasn’t dead after a busy day. ‘Hey it’s 3-job day. Text me later so I know you lived. Oh, and Nemuri says we’re going out drinking this weekend. Bring All Might so I can threaten him into treating you two right.’ ‘I also need to make jokes before Nemuri can.’ ‘I at least show mercy and know when to quit.’

After that it was Tenya, a simple message that was dated for not long before the curfew of the dorms, ‘I hope you are resting well and doing better, Hizashi-nii-san. Please take care of yourself!’ Damn, the kid was so fucking sweet. Hizashi couldn’t wait until he graduated and dropped the stupid ‘Yamada-sensei’ bullshit he had been doing since he had been accepted into U.A..

The messages were shorter after that, but they were still all there. A picture from Shinsou that showed a cat high off catnip, a message from Shima that was just her being annoying as hell, a reminder from Ito to get his shit together and rest, and even a check-in from Suzuki that wavered between telling him he was going to die of stress in less than five years and giving him detailed updates on everything that was happening in the studio.

It was… They were all just… Hizashi didn’t know how to explain what he felt, but he knew he fucking loved every single person in his life who had his back.

“You know,” Toshinori spoke up, voice soft and sleepy, “You don’t have to deal with these kinds of days on your own.” He really, really didn’t. “I don’t know if it was different when you were younger, but you’re not on your own. You don’t have to deal with this yourself.” And Toshinori was… right.

This wasn’t back when he was a teenager who had just gotten into U.A. and was still frightened of anyone moving too fast or getting too close to him. This wasn’t back when his ‘bad days’ would end up with him screaming and crying to the point of seeing hallucinations, a teenage Shouta clutching onto him and keeping his quirk erased for hours at a time so he didn’t tear the whole block down.

“That so, huh?” Hizashi turned his head back towards Toshinori, looking up at him and feeling nothing but warm fuzziness filling him up from one end to the other. “Because you’re here?”

Toshinori barked a laugh at the tease, tugging Hizashi into a soft kiss before parting just enough to whisper a soft, “Because we are here.” As if in agreement, Shouta gave a loud snore, Hizashi burying his face to try and contain the wild burst of laughter that almost flew out of him. “Think you’ll be able to remember that sweetheart?”

“Trust me, Toshi, I don’t think I’ll be forgetting that anytime soon.” Because every single one of them had been there, in some way, to try and make his day better. It had been a bad day, and a hard one at that, but Hizashi had gotten through it just like he had all the ones before -- and all the ones he knew would come after.

Letting his eyes fall shut, Hizashi settled down in the warmth and quiet of the room, hearing nothing but his Toshinori’s soft breathing and Shouta’s sleepy mumbles and mutters; no whispers or words to be heard. It was just the three of them, home and safe and where they belonged. 

It was exactly where Hizashi wanted to be. 

#bnha #boku no hero academia #where i want to be #allerasermic #mha #my hero academia #original #my writing

[rentranslates]

Danshi Koukousei Hajimete No Episode 7 Short Story

Prequel story as roughly translated from this original material 

First Love Sprout

By: Ginger Berry

Translation: Ren

"How about this, Tsukigase. Can I leave it to you?"

That happened one school day near the end of August.

I asked Outa-sensei, who is painting by himself in the Art Club Room as usual, to lend us the electronic drill we needed in preparation for the presentation during Cultural Festival. In exchange of lending his drill, he made a strange request.

"Have you heard about the exchange student who will be coming to your class starting the second term?"

"Yes, I've heard about it, but..."

"That student, it was decided that he’ll become a homestay at the Chairman's place. Take care of him, will you?"

From what I heard, that exchange student's grandfather was a common acquaintance between Chairman and Outa-sensei.

It was probably also because of it, that it was decided that he stay at Konomi Gakuen. But since the Chairman would not be able to tend to all his needs, someone should be able to become his helping hand. And that was Outa-sensei's condition for letting us borrow the drill.

I am more than happy to become of help. To an exchange student, who was away from his family for around one year, would definitely be anxious and troubled. Fortunately, I was good at English and could speak a little. Still, I should practice speaking until the next term.

Of course, I said as I nod to Outa-sensei.

"This is probably a good thing, for both of you," Outa-sensei said with a mysterious smile in his face.

***************

Laughter filled the center of the classroom after the classes. In the middle of that, surrounded by several girls and boys, was the exchange student who had just been admitted on this second term, Albert Nanao Ainsworth.

"..."

I immediately gulped down the sigh I wanted to let out - the exchange student did not really need any help at all. A week ago, after he introduced himself with "My name's pretty long, so just call me Nanao", he instantly became the center of the class.

Although, for some reason, he was strangely attached to me. I thought Outa-sensei told him something, but sensei flatly rejected my suspicion. Up until now, he was still repeatedly stealing glances on me even though he should be preoccupied with the other people.

"Hey, Ai. What are you doing while thumping the keyboard?"

"It has nothing to do with you."

Ah, really, Nanao shrugged his shoulders while returning to others' conversation. I secretly let out a sigh... I wondered if that was too unnatural.

But I was relieved when I saw that others did not really mind what just happened.

In order to not pay attention to Nanao, I keenly stared at the screen of my laptop. I had not yet finished even half of what I should be accomplishing for today.

"But, Nanao's really good at Japanese."

"Really? I still don't know some words, you know. Like, ..."

Nanao whispered the continuation, and everyone was "what?" as they wondered. Only me who knew what it meant blushed from afar. When Nanao noticed my face, he gave a meaningful wink, but I ignored it and pretended to be busy with what I had been doing.

But really, I needed to focus.

There was only 2 months before cultural festival. Our class presentation, the jet coaster was actually my idea. I will definitely make it succeed.

While desperately trying to regain my momentum, I finished jotting down the information I got from the 3rd years during the lunch break.

I noted down all the things we needed to prepare. The tentative schedule during the cultural festival. Budget. Important points for the working the class presentation. Most parts of the blueprint for the jet coaster had been completed during summer break, but problem would definitely arise when actually working on it. Also, the division of work during the day of cultural festival itself. There were still a lot of things to do.

Moreover, the advice from the senpais who accomplished a coffee cup class presentation was actually an important thing to consider.

"In the end, be it a coffee cup or jet coaster, you still need manpower during the cultural festival, right? That time was our spotlight!"

"Yeah. We could not assist during the preparation, so we're glad we could help in that way"

"Shima, you were really desperate the rotate those right"

These were the stories from Yamabuki-senpai which is part of Basketball club and Kawai-senpai from Track and Field club. Since both of them were busy with their respective clubs, they were not able to help during the preparation of the class presentation so they were glad to be able to make memories on the day of the cultural festival itself. I should also take note of this...

"Ai, don't make such a scary face, come here"

I was caught unprepared when I suddenly felt a weight in my shoulders. Before I noticed it, Nanao had gotten so close and he tried to put his chins in my shoulder as he peeked at the laptop monitor.

"What's this? A blueprint?"

"...Yeah"

With Nanao's voice, everyone in the class gathered around us. It was amazing how he could do that so simply.

"What do you plan to create with that?"

"The class attraction, a jet coaster."

"Jet coaster?! With the class? You can do that?"

Unconsciously, my body cowered when he made such a surprised voice. "I want to make a jet coaster" - I almost recalled the stupid face I made as I told this to the homeroom teacher. Everyone in the class agreed to do it, but I wondered what someone from outside like Nanao thought about it. He would probably say that something like that could not possibly be -

"Wow, that's interesting!"

"Eh..."

When I turned my face unintentionally, Nanao's face was really close. And when I saw his eyes sparkling at the blueprint on the monitor, I felt a little nervous.

Then, Nanao stretched his hand from my body to the monitor and pointed out some things.

"So this is the course...I see, there are curves huh. Is this curve for slowing down?"

"Ye-yeah...If the speed gets too high, there's a risk of derailment after all..."

Without minding the distance, Nanao continued with his questions as he stared at the screen. Calculation of strength, safety devices, acceleration and friction. Since he was trying to understand the tricks and patterns in it, he also got me passionate about explaining it to him.

And the class who heard our exchanges also got interested.

"Oh, so you really need to consider a lot of things huh..."

"It's a lie, sorry. We left everything to Tsukigase"

"No, I did it because everyone listened to my selfish demand"

It was two years ago. I was still conflicted which high school to enroll, so I visited the Konomi Gakuen's Cultural Festival to learn the school's atmosphere. Then, there I saw the jet coaster. I was amazed that they can make those things by themselves. I was sure that something would change if I go to that kind of high school where they are free to make such creations.

In the end, they were not able to make the jet coaster move. So, when I enrolled in this school, I decided to make it successful.

When I shared this to the class, they decided to cooperate with my plan. I was so happy. That's why I would definitely make it successful. No, it would be successful.

"But, why is the course so short? If you reroute it here, it will be more interesting, don't you think?"

Nanao pointed out as he intently gazed at the blueprint.

I was amazed Nanao actually noticed that. When I first made the blueprint, the original plan is to make it move from the classroom's entrance and the course should last long for 1 week. But now, it was more compacted and should only run for half the week.

"There's not enough budget. And schedule."

"What do you need to buy?"

"Mainly, wood. If only we can get some scrap wood from construction sites, it's easier but..."

"Then, why don't we search one?"

Nanao remarked as if it was simple, as he turned to face everybody.

"Someone knows something like that? Someone with lots of spare wood?"

Everyone looked at each other.

Nanao said that, but it was not as if I had not yet searched for one. But something so convenient like that would not just pop out. It was impossible.

But then, a girl exclaimed "Ah!"

"It's not a construction site, but our house's currently being remodeled. I'll try asking them."

"Oh, if it's a remodeling company they will have information on where to get scrap wood..."

Isn't that just a trouble. For the remodeling company. And for her family also.

I was about to refuse her offer when Nanao beat me to it and gestured a thumbs up to the girl.

"Yosh! It's decided! Where's your house, Kanako?"

"Eh...? You'll come to our house, Nanao?"

"Well, isn't it better to talk to them about our situation? I plan to go with Ai. Anyone wants to go too?"

"Can I also go?"

"Of course,"

"Do you plan to go after this? I'll tell my family."

"Hmm, what do you think Ai? Can you go?"

The conversation continued before I knew it. I was not able to keep up with it and unknowingly let out a "Won't it be a bother?" while feeling restless. And she immediately shook her head.

"Not at all. Ah, but there's a chance they might refuse, okay?"

"Of course, there's also that. But..."

"Don't mind it, it's not a bother, really... Actually I've wanted to help before, but I don't want to become a hindrance to you, Tsukigase."

"A hindrance?"

That was so unexpected, and I could not help blinking my eyes. There was no way someone like her would be a hindrance. However, everyone seemingly agreed with her.

As if there was a misunderstanding regarding my behavior.

When I became listless, Nanao let out a big sigh.

"You see, Ai, everyone wants to help. Since we're going to do something interesting, don't just monopolize it and let everyone join."

"I'm not monopolizing anything."

"Really? But you know, I never knew you were doing something like that."

"Ah, I'm sorry if I wasn't able to explain this to you..."

"That's not it."

Nanao extended his big hands. For a moment, I thought he was going to beat me up so I kept myself on guard, but those hands gently patted my shoulders.

"You do everything by yourself."

"Eh..."

"Everyone knows you're doing your best. So, we want to help, right?"

"Yeah, that's right!"

Someone from the class agreed with a large voice. Then came a stream of voices of what they can do to help, or apologies for not helping since Tsukigase can do anything, or admiration on the blueprint.

They did not really have to apologize. At first, I was surprised but later I realized.

Everyone said "We'll help you" when I presented the idea. But I proceeded with the plan without telling them at all, and this troubled everybody.

I recalled what Yamabuki-senpai told me this afternoon. "Our spotlight!" and "We're glad to help". The senpais who told me those lines looked so pleased. I certainly felt their delight...

I don't want to bother anyone - those thoughts were just so selfish I felt so embarrassed about my attitude.

"I'm sorry."

"What are you apologizing for?"

Nanao asked exasperatedly.

Ah, right. I should not be apologizing.

I looked at everyone. We were all too awkward to say anything. Not everyone can be as bold as Nanao, after all. We were all trying to be considerate on each other, and then in process, we left some things unclear.

But that was not it. That was not what I want to do.

"...Thank you."

I almost whispered, but everyone sighed with relief.

My chest felt warm with delight and contentment. This was the result I wanted. I was not wrong. I felt a smile creeping up on my face, but suddenly, something big pressed on my body.

"?!"

"This is crazy! Ai, you're soo cute!"

The moment I realized it was Nanao's abdomen that embraced me tightly, I suddenly felt so hot I thought my whole body ignited with flames. The perfume Nanao always wore permeated from my nose up to my brain. I also felt his hard and muscular abdomen, strong arms, body temperature. I could not breathe.

"Hey Nanao, release Tsukigase. He's stiff as rock."

"Don't wanna-"

"Don't "don't wanna" me. What's with that cutesy line?"

Everyone was laughing but I could only hear the loud palpitations of my heart.

"Ai, you don't hate this, right?"

He said with a playful voice, but Nanao let go of my body and met my eyes. Then, his eyes looked at me with a surprised expression. Reflexively, I pushed him and stood up. I was lost on what to do, so I ran out of the classroom to escape from Nanao's touch.

What should I do? He would definitely think it was weird. Or maybe he noticed.

I jumped on the nearest toilet, locked the door and breathed deeply several times. I lowered my view and terrifyingly, saw the erection rising through my pants. That was humiliating.

No, no, that's not it!

I clutched the hand that was trying to relieve my erection as I desperately tried to keep myself calm.

Nanao s kind to everyone. I'm not special to him. Don't misunderstand his actions. I'm the one who's weird for getting excited from his hug. Yeah, I'm the weird one.

I clenched my teeth as I tried not to get crazy about the faint smell of that perfume left in my clothes.

I like Nanao. Probably. Most likely. From the start. Always.

I know. I just didn't want to accept it. I won't accept it.

Nanao was my ideal person. His face, voice, cleverness, kindness. As I knew more about him, I realize he was my complete opposite.

That's why.

I won't get closer to him than this. Not any closer.

I breathed quietly. To calm my palpitation and to hide everything deep in my heart. It's okay. I can do this. I will not let him notice it. I will never tell it. We will be just classmates all throughout this 1 year of his stay.

Even if that means he will end up hating me.

#danshi koukousei hajimete no #danhaji7 #danhaji #tsukigaseai #albertnanaoainsworth #translation

[poyomon2]

let's play "Sentence prompts": #26 for Angelmaker, pretty, pretty please :> (and may I request big fluff with it? only if it's okay... !)

I should probably post this one shouldn’t I. It’s been forever. Probably not as fluffy as I’d like but I tried!

26. “Did I just say that?”

The crack of thunder shook the two of them out of their focus on their schoolwork, making them both look up in surprise.

Rain was coming down in sheets, causing muddy rivers to flow down the various paths of the park. 

Aoi stood up from her side of the table set, walking to the edge of the gazebo. “When did it start raining?” She asked, looking back in Yusaku’s direction.

He shrugged. He wasn’t sure either. He began to pack up the various books and materials they had, stacking them into a pile, before joining her at the edge.

He peered at the sky, frowning. “It doesn’t look like it’s going to let up any time soon.”

Aoi groaned. “Of course not. Just our luck. My place is too far from here to make it in any reasonable amount of time.”

Yusaku pondered the distances for a moment, then nodded. “My apartment isn’t too far from here, and if I’m remembering correctly, there’s a store along the way we can buy an umbrella at.”

Aoi hummed. “Are you sure? You’ve never wanted me to visit in the past.”

“That was-” before it stopped mattering whether or not she knew he was Playmaker. He still hadn’t told her.

He recognised the reason for what it was, though. A flimsy excuse. There wasn’t really anything in his apartment that could tip someone off to the fact that he was Playmaker. Especially now that Ai wasn’t around.

He knew, inside himself, that he just didn’t want to ruin her opinion of him. He didn’t know what she would think when she saw he lived in such a run-down place. He could tell he had budding feelings for her, but he didn’t want to mess anything up between them.

So he kept putting it off, telling himself that she could visit another day.

‘Another day’ had come, he supposed.

“Fujiki?”

He gave a start, realising she was still looking at him. Waiting for him to finish his sentence. He waved a hand. “Nevermind. It’s fine.”

He stared out into the rain, then turned and picked up the stack of books. “We should go before it gets worse.”

Aoi blinked, looking back and forth between him and the rain. “I don’t think it can.”

“It will, just for us.”

Then he ran out, moving between what little cover he could while sheltering the books from the rain, ignoring her call to wait for her.

She hurried after him, laughing slightly. “You could have let me carry some of the books!”

—

The two burst through the door, out of the rain, panting with exhaustion. The store hadn’t ended up having any umbrellas, so they were both soaking wet despite their best efforts.

They’d managed to keep the books from suffering any permanent damage, though, so that was good. 

“It’s better than outside, but it’s still cold.” Aoi commented.

“I’ve got a heater in my room. We’ll be going through to there.”

They passed several rooms, before coming upon a door which Yusaku opened, waving her in. Descending some stairs, she noticed that there wasn’t much in the room, aside from some basic furniture.

“Welcome home, master!” A cheerful voice greeted them, and Yusaku gave a tired, sad smile at the small robot at the bottom of the stairs.

“I’m back, Roboppy. We’ve got a guest today.”

“A guest!” The small robot cheered, waving its arms in the air. Aoi giggled slightly, but stopped at its next words. “According to data from my previous iteration, it has been five hundred and twenty four days since anyone else stepped foot in your home! Congratulations!”

“Five hundred-” She began, but hesitated.

Yusaku gave a short, dull laugh. “Thanks, Roboppy. Please be silent while she’s here.”

“Understood!” The small robot moved to the corner, powering down with a happy tune.

Aoi paused on the stairs, looking at Yusaku’s back as he continued down them. He suddenly looked extremely tired.

“I can come back another time if you want.”

“It’s fine.” Yusaku set the books down on the table, leaning down to turn on a heater. Before long, the room had started to become warm enough for them to be comfortable.

Aoi put her books down, too, then they both sat down on the floor.

“Your parents aren’t home?” The moment the words left her mouth, she realised the apartment wasn’t big enough to comfortably support more than a single person, and winced.

As she expected, Yusaku’s eyes slid sideways and looked down at the floor. Her heart reached out to him as she instinctively knew what that reaction meant.

“Sorry.” She leaned forward and grabbed a hold of his hands. “You don’t have to say anything.”

“It’s fine. I never really knew them anyway.”

He stared at her hands holding his, giving a small smile, before shaking them off and reaching to remove his jacket. He placed it on the floor in front of the heater, then beckoned for her to do the same, so she did.

He pinched at his shirt, then looked at her. “I’m going to get another shirt to wear. Uh-” He hesitated. “Would you like to borrow one for the time being?”

“Ah, if you don’t mind.” She looked away to hide the slight red on her cheeks.

“Alright.” He walked back up the stairs, exiting the room and leaving her alone with her thoughts.

She regret agreeing to visit. She was a mess, her thoughts were a mess, and she didn’t really know how to interact with him. She didn’t think she could focus on the schoolwork anymore, either.

She sat down against the bed, contemplating what to do when he returned.

A few minutes passed, and she heard the door to the room open. Turning her head towards the sound, she got a face full of shirt as she heard the door close again.

She laughed under her breath at the action. He could have at least said something.

Nonetheless, she changed her shirt before calling that it was okay.

Yusaku tentatively stepped back into the room, descending the stairs once more. He threw his wet shirt down next to hers by the heater before sitting down near her.

“Should we do some of the work now?” He asked.

She looked down at the floor. “I don’t know. I can’t really focus now.”

“Oh.”

They fell silent.

Yusaku wasn’t sure what to make of the situation anymore. He’d invited her over for once in order to get the work done, but now they weren’t going to do it.

He felt comfortable, though. Having her around made him feel happier, and he realised how lonely it could be without someone else around. It was silent, but it was a nice kind of silent.

Now that he thought about it, compared to Takeru, or, if he had to, Naoki, he much preferred Aoi’s company instead.

He smiled quietly to himself, then glanced at Aoi.

He froze. She was staring at him with a blush on her face.

He blinked at her, confused for just a moment, then it hit him.

“Did I just say that?”

She nodded. “Yeah. Is there… a reason for that?”

He looked down at the floor as his face flushed red. “It’s just that- Shima is kind of obnoxious to be around most of the time, and Takeru doesn’t really stop talking for large stretches of time. You’re much quieter in comparison, which makes me feel a lot better instead. I don’t have to feel like I need to keep up with everything going on at once.”

She smiled at him, then shuffled over to sit closer. “Thanks.”

“And- I just feel comfortable around you. You don’t prod too much. Even now- you didn’t ask about what Roboppy said, nor about my parents.”

“You don’t have to say anything if you don’t want to talk about it.”

He nodded, then leaned back to lie on the floor, turning onto his side. “Maybe I will another time. Sorry I keep so many secrets.”

“It’s fine! It was obvious you were, but it’s not my business.” She laid down facing him with a smile. “I can come around more often if you’d like.”

“That would be… nice…” He smiled back at her.

She extended her hand out to sit between them. He stared at it for a moment, then hesitantly reached his hand out to touch it, before grabbing hold of it lightly.

The sound of the rain began to lull them to sleep, both content with the other’s presence.

Aoi later had to stop herself from screaming her brother’s head off when she was woken up by his call.

#vrains #vrains ficstuff #aoi zaizen #yusaku fujiki #angelmakershipping #asks #breakdawn-avenue #thank you for the prompt! sorry it took forever #honestly this was an experience to write and I kinda wasn't sure entirely where I was going with it #poyo writing ficstuff

[chamibii]

Boundaries - Sneak Peek

So, I'm posting a continuation of "How does that make you feel". I'm actually gonna sit at my computer and type this up and not be a trash ass person and stress my note app out 🤣 but, enjoy this sneak peek! A few warnings: slightly NSFW and assault ((both physical and sexual))

***

Bakugou sat in the lobby impatiently tapping his foot. He checks his watch, again, and looks towards the door. What the fuck was taking him so long?

The receptionist peered over her glasses to give him a dirty look. "You know he can seriously get in trouble for this."

Bakugou flips her off and keeps tapping his foot.

There was a faint crackle and Midoriya's voice rang out over the intercom, "Bakugou, that was rude. You really ought to apologize to Hagakure."

Bakugou sat with his arms crossed and averts his eyes. He could feel the smug bitch looking at him.

"Progress is a process Bakugou. Don't take two steps back over a simple apology."

Bakugou hates that damn intercom system. He sighs and barks out an apology. "Sorry."

"Good job Bakugou. You can come in now."

Bakugou walkd past the receptionist desk and hisses out, "jealous bitch".

Hagakure gasped and clutches her chest.

Bakugou enters the office and leans over the desk to place a chaste kiss on Midoriya's lips. "You either have to schedule my appointments later in the day or stop demanding I'm so loud while we're fucking. That jealous extra is pissing me off."

Midoriya laughs and guides Bakugou around the desk to pull him in his lap. "Hagakure is concerned that I can get in trouble, but she won't say anything."

Bakugou sighs softly as Midoriya nuzzles his neck.

They were in a weird psuedo-relationship. Bakugou continued therapy once a week with Midoriya and Midoriya came over nearly every night to fuck Bakugou..hard. Bakugou still hadn't acknowledged his feelings for Midoriya, but he seemed to be okay with how things were.

"Where'd you go Kacchan?" Midoriya whispers softly against his neck.

"Nowhere, I'm here with you."

"Should we actually have a session today?" Midoriya wraps his arms around Bakugou's waist and pulls him in closer. "You up to it?"

Bakugou tenses up at the question. Midoriya pulls back and looks up at him. "Tell me what's bothering you Bakugou?"

He leand into Midoriya's chest, hiding his face. "I-had the nightmare again."

--

If there was one thing he was good at, it was his job. He loved being a bartender. He thrived at night and was able to truly be himself. No one told him what to do and how to do it. He just had to mix a strong drink, flash a smile, maybe show a bit of skin, and the patrons became regular and the tips rolled in.

"Hey beautiful", a familiar voice called out.

Bakugou rolled his eyes and turned to face Mineta, a regular at the bar.

"What're you having tonight Mineta?"

"Hopefully you."

Before Bakugou could respond, Kirishima, his best friend, groaned loudly. "Really bro? How many dudes have fallen for that line?"

Mineta's cheeks were dusted red with embarrassment. "I wasn't talking to you, hair for brains."

Bakugou slammed down a mug and placed both hands on the bar to lean in close to Mineta. "You can either respect me and my friend, or you can fucking leave my bar. Got it?"

Mineta placed a hand on top of Bakugou's and leaned in closely. "Sure thing, sweet cheeks."

Bakugou snatched his hand back and sneered with disgust. "Are you drinking or not man?"

Mineta placed his usual order, sat in his usual seat and drank until last call.

Kirishima and Bakugou were closing down the bar that night. Bakugou knew that Kirishima had a boyfriend at home and he didnt want to make him stay for a job that was realistically a one person job.

"You sure you're good to stay alone? That fucking perv is still here.."

Bakugou pushed Kirishima towards the door. "Go, go. I can handle him."

Kirishima looked at him with concern. "You'll text me as soon as you get in?"

Bakugou rolled his eyes dramatically. "Of course Ei. Now go! Before Kaminari starts accusing me of trying to ruin your relationship."

Kirishima placed a kiss on top of Bakugou's head and hugged him tightly. "Be safe man. I'll see you tomorrow night."

Bakugou went back to wiping down the bar. He spied Mineta standing up on wobbly legs with his car keys in his hand.

"A little help getting to my car Bakubro?"

Bakugou grit his teeth and took a deep breath. "Unless you plan on sleeping it off in your car, I've already called you a cab. You can sit in here until they come."

Mineta muttered a quick thanks and sat at the bar.

"Y'know, I bet I can fuck you better than 'shima can", Mineta slurred.

Bakugou clenched his fist and willed himself to calm down. He knew the man was just drunk.

"I mean, have you even seen my dick dude? Like its fuckin huge."

"I highly doubt it." Bakugou snapped.

Mineta's eyes flashed with anger. Bakugou sighed and attempted to soothe the angry man.

"Look, it's been a long night--"

"Shut the fuck up, faggot."

Bakugou's head snapped back as if he had been hit. "What the fuck did you say to me?"

Mineta came around the bar and grabbed Bakugou's wrist tightly. He attempted to wrench away, but the man had a powerful grip.

"I said, shut the fuck up faggot. You prance around in your tight ass jeans showing off your cock and your crop tops to show off your fucking dormal, whatever the fucks, and you get mad at ME when I take the bait? You're such a fucking cock tease."

Bakugou felt a mixture of fear and rage; However, neither emotion was enough to snap him out of being paralyzed. His chest rose and fell rapidly. Mineta leaned in close enough for Bakugou to smell the stale stench of beer on his breath.

"I'm tired of you teasing me. So I'm just gonna take what I fucking please." Mineta's thick rubbery lips crashing against Bakugou's and his clammy hand sliding down his pants was enough to push him into action.

Bakugou grabbed the closest thing to him and smacked Mineta in the head. He released Bakugou's wrist and stood blinking in shock. Bakugou felt something within him snap and he pounced on the man, pummeling him with closed fists. He didn't stop until he felt a pair of hands pull him off.

When he looked down, he saw Mineta bloodied and crying. He pulled away from the hands and saw the driver shaking. "I already called the police.. they're on the way."

Bakugou backed away and sat on the floor of the bar sobbing. The police alerted the owner of the assault and Aizawa showed up, eyes heavy with sleep.

"Help me to understand why one of our regulars is in the hospital with a broken eye socket, nose, and a severe concussion."

"He's fucking lucky that's all I did to him Shota."

"Look, I know your temper is explosive, but you gotta use your goddamn head. Good thing for you, I have hidden cameras in the bar so, we do have him assaulting you on tape."

Bakugou breathed a sigh of relief.

"But, you're on leave. Something like this can fuck you up and make you more explosive than you already are. So, you need to go see a therapist. You cannot return to work until he gives you the all clear."

---

"In the nightmare, I'm not able to stop him.. and he--he--" Bakugou feels hot tears sliding down his cheek.

"Hey, hey, I got you. Okay? You're safe." Midoriya places a kiss on Bakugou's forehead. "You attempted to set a boundary by demanding his respect. That's a good thing Kacchan."

Bakugou feels weak and vulnerable, just like he did that night. "Why didnt I move? Why didnt I push him away?" His voice was soft, barely audible.

"People often think of our reactions being just fight or flight, but theres a third one: freeze. It's a natural reaction to being cornered. You weren't weak."

Bakugou presses his palms hard into his eyes to stop his tears. He sat up straight and took a deep breath. "You know, when we actually have sessions, you're a really good fucking therapist Izuku."

Midoriya laughs and pulls Bakugou's face to his and kisses him softly. "I know", he whispers against soft lips.

#bnha deku #bnha fanfiction #bnha #bnha kirishima #bnha bakugou #bnha bakugo katsuki #bakudeku

[rhnuzlocke]

Chapter Two: In Another Land

Ren stood at the front desk in the Oldale Pokemon Center, flanked by her parents. Tāraki lay back on the counter, pushing himself up and down with his tail in what seemed to be his version of push-ups while Ren filled out her information. She signed her name and slid the tablet back to the nurse.

“Okay!” he said cheerfully as he checked everything over. “That should be it for the paperwork.” He handed Ren a square device that looked more like a mini laptop than any Pokégear she’d ever seen. “Here is your trainer card and PokéNav, which comes loaded with all of the basic apps and functions. You can buy anything else you might want online, and it will download pretty much anywhere that isn’t underground. Congratulations, you are now a registered trainer!”

“Thank you so much,” Ren said as Tāraki hopped to his feet and clambered up her arm to crouch on her shoulder, tail swaying.

“You’re welcome!” the nurse responded with a smile.

Senri leaned back on the counter to face his daughter. “I was beginning to think it would never happen.”

She shot an irritated glance his way and responded in Kantogo so that the nurse wouldn’t overhear. “Don’t you dare be smug about this.”

“Who’s smug?” he said jovially. “I’m just happy.”

“Good, because Tāraki is the one who roped me into this.”

Senri looked no less pleased because of her harshness, and Ren turned to her mother, who was bravely was trying not to cry.

“Oh, Renko,” she said, hugging her daughter tightly, “I’m so proud.”

“Okāsan, arigatō,” Ren chuckled, hugging her back.

“Well, I really have to get to work. I can’t wait to tell everyone my daughter is finally a trainer!”

“Otōsaannn,” Ren groaned, but he ignored her.

“See you later!” he called as he exited.

Ren snorted at him, and Tāraki filched the trainer ID out of her hand while she was distracted.

“You should go to the mart to get your supplies,” Asuka prompted. “I’m going to head home and unpack for a bit. Ahh, the joys of moving. I’ll see you for dinner, I hope?”

“I’ll be home early to help, silly,” Ren assured her, giving her a kiss on the head.

Oldale was small, but was still an actual town equipped with all of the amenities that designation implied like a grocery store, post office, fire station, and library. Ren wandered down the main street for a bit before striking back out onto Route 101.

Tāraki bounded excitedly ahead of Ren on the trail for a bit, then climbed a tree and started leaping from branch to branch, flipping and twisting midair as his confidence built up steam. Despite his   circuitous route, he inevitably outstripped her. He landed on a low branch and swung beneath it, hanging like a Zubat as he waited for her to catch up. Ren laughed at him and picked up her pace.

A bush rustled near the path ahead of them and Tāraki launched himself into it before Ren could think. There were sounds of struggle, and a moment later, he came tumbling back out and landed on his face.

“Tāraki?”

Instead of a wild pokemon, Jay the Torchic emerged from the bushes with a disgruntled cluck. She cheeped angrily at Tāraki as he picked himself up. He made a quiet gurgle, looking moderately contrite.

Pacified, she turned to Ren and chirped pleasantly.

“Hi Jay,” Ren replied. “Sorry about him. Is Kai around?”

Jay trilled loudly into the woods and Kai’s distant voice responded, followed soon after by the rest of him.

“Hey Ren!” Jay peeped something to him before Ren could greet him. “Ha, sounds like him,” said Kai with a fond grin at Tāraki. But apparently Jay wasn’t done and she jerked her head at Ren this time. “Um…” Kai ventured uncertainly, clearly not eager to repeat whatever his pokemon was saying. Jay peeped stubbornly and jerked her head more forcefully. “Okay,” Kai muttered to her under his breath before looking back up at Ren. “She says she already told him, but you should also tell Treecko to be more careful because he’ll listen now that you’re his trainer—no she’s—”

Jay interrupted his objection with an emphatic chirp.

“Wait, that’s a PokéNav! So you are a trainer now?”

“Yeah,” Ren admitted. “We were just in Oldale registering.”

“Awesome!” Kai crowed. “What changed your mind?” Then more softly as he lost confidence: “Or maybe you always wanted to…”

“Tāraki talked me into it,” she explained. “And Jay is right, please don’t go pouncing on things without looking. There could have been a Growlithe in that bush for all you knew.”

“Not in this region!” Kai chuckled, then caught himself. “BUT, um, it’s great that you’re a trainer now! The only other trainer I know is your dad, and he is like super busy all the time but now we can battle and, uh, um, that is, if you want?” He seemed to notice his babbling and the rather discouraging expression on Ren’s face at about the same time and abruptly changed topic. “SOOO, Tāraki? His name is Tāraki?”

“Yep.”

“Oh, like a breeze, right? I like it. It really fits.” Kai looked like he might still implode from embarrassment and Ren finally cracked a smile.

“So, what do you think, Shima? Ready for your first official battle?”

Tāraki hopped up, fist in the air, then flexed unimpressively.

Kai remained dumb for a moment. “Oh! How about you Jay? Ready to take ’em?”

Jay trilled and tensed into a fighting stance, eyes glinting.

Kai tapped his PokéNav, and Ren followed suit. Once the battle parameters were set, the two began.

“We’ll start!” Ren called “Pound her legs, she’s only got two!”

Tāraki dove forward and spun, tail sweeping low.

“Catch him!” Kai commanded.

Jay reacted fluidly, grabbing Tāraki’s tail with one foot and spinning on the other. Her talons dug in as she used the momentum to fling Tāraki away.

“Naruhodo! Ni ashi dake ga hitsuyo desu!” Ren muttered, eyebrows raised. She grinned and her whole face lit up. “Alright, hit with your fist this time. Use your tail as a counterweight!”

Tāraki leapt forward again, too fast for Jay to dodge. She caught his punch, but he swung his tail as he wrenched his arm to the side. Jay hit the ground and released him.

“She’s open!” Ren cried.

Tāraki was already diving on top of her.

“Kick him!” Kai yelled.

Jay rolled onto her back just in time to meet Tāraki’s chest with both feet. Tāraki went flying, but flipped in the air and gracefully stuck the landing.

“Nice save, Shima!” Ren cheered. “Try a one-two combo.”

Jay caught the first strike but had nothing for the second and went sliding back, even more winded because she was holding on.

“Let her up and aim high this time!” Ren commanded.

Jay hopped to her feet, and Tāraki leapt up into the air for an overhead somersault tail-strike.

“Bring him back down!”

Jay flipped as Tāraki came down, catching him mid-air so that Tāraki landed on his back with Jay on his chest. He groaned, but when his eyes re-opened, they were full of defiance. He grabbed her leg, but before he could throw her off, she head-butted him. His arms fell to the ground, stunned.

“Alright, you beat us.” Ren conceded, still smiling. She crouched down as Jay hopped off him. “You okay, Tāraki?”

The Treecko hauled himself up into a sitting position and grimaced, but gave her the thumbs up.

“Good battle,” Ren told him encouragingly. “Maybe just lay off some of the unnecessary flipping, at least when your opponent is almost as fast as you.” They smiled at each other, and Ren turned to Jay. “And you have some nice moves, my friend!” She offered her fist and Jay tapped it with a preee!

“That was a close match. You guys did great,” Kai congratulated them.

“Thanks!” Ren responded as she scooped up Tāraki. “I better go patch this guy up.”

“Bring him back to the lab! We have a health care machine there. No one would mind, and it’ll save you a bunch on potions and stuff.”

“I’ve never used one,” Ren admitted.

“I’ll show you!” Kai volunteered. “It’s super simple! I’m sure Jay could use a break too after that.”

“Lead the way,” Ren told him.

They started off towards Littleroot but barely got ten feet before Kai’s enthusiasm got the better of him again.

“Oh, and when we get back to the lab we can load DexNav and some other apps on your nav! You can even have some pokeballs if you want! You’re helping with the pokedex so it’s totally fine!”

Ren tried and failed not to smile at his excited rambling.

“Of course, I hadn’t bought any pokeballs. But I couldn’t say no when it made him so happy.”

And was that the only reason?  

“It felt like it. I held out for a while. But you’re probably right. Somehow I’m always working against myself.”

...

Tāraki was already hanging from the door, and Ren had to laugh at his impatience before caving to his wishes and setting out into a warm and misty morning. They had barely made it to the road when she spotted her neighbor setting out as well.

“Hello, Kai! Where are you off to?”

He stopped and waved, letting her catch up to him. “Just up to the pond off Route 103 and then over to the estuary. A wild told us that they’d seen Rosy Wingull in the area, and we’re trying to confirm if any migrate through the mid-continent.”

“That sounds cool. Tāraki and I don’t really have a plan. He just wanted to go out.”

“Oh, do you maybe want to come with us then?” he ventured, wringing his hands.

“Yeah! That would be great!”

Her enthusiasm seemed to soothe his nerves and his shoulders fell back down from around his ears. He didn’t say much at first as they hiked up the trail, but she started asking him questions about the local flora and fauna and soon he was rambling away with barely a pause to let her get a word in.

“It was nice having such an expert to guide me around when I first got here. Thanks to him, none of it seemed so strange after a while.”

I think perhaps I owe him something as well, for making you feel at home here.  

“I probably wouldn’t be doing any of this without him.”

Perhaps not.  

“So will you let me tell him?”

I will… consider it.  

There were no Wingull—Rosy or otherwise—on the pond, so Ren strode up to its edge and looked down into the clear, dark water. “It looks so deep.”

“It is,” said Kai. “It used to be a quarry, a very old one, all pokemon excavation.”

She admired it a little longer, until Tāraki stuck his whole head in and blew bubbles into it, which made her snort with laughter. They settled some distance away so as not to disturb any wild pokemon who came to drink, and passed an hour or two with intermittent conversation, just watching the world go by.

“He taught me how to record with the pokedex, so I could actually help a little with Prof. Birch’s pokemon distribution work, and showed me how to look up all kinds of useful things. It really is an amazing tool. And it’s always tough to not be at least a little interested with how excited Kai is about it.”

I have always found the human desire to collect knowledge admirable and quite useful at times. It is one of the reasons Latias and I work with your species. Even existing as long as we have, we could never hope to gather as much.  

“That almost makes me feel proud, but also pretty under-qualified.”

Nonsense. Please continue. There must be a reason you found this day important.  

An unusual Taillow caught Ren’s eye and she grabbed for his wrist. “Kai, what variant is—” The way he startled at her touch made her draw back immediately and cut her question short. He looked absolutely mortified, and her gut twisted up in knots. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” he said quickly.

She couldn’t look at him. “I shouldn’t have—I wasn’t thinking.”

“I wanted to leave it there. I hate exposing myself like that. But it felt like I owed him an explanation.”

You are brave, Ren. You were afraid, but you did what you thought was right.

“Some things are worth the risk.”

“In Johto, we don’t use personal names unless you’re very close to the person. I guess I’m still getting used to it not meaning the same thing here.”

“It really is okay,” Kai said gently, and she dared to meet his eyes again. “I don’t mind. I just startle easy, that’s all. And I’d like to be friends. It would make our parents happy.”

She grinned. “Are yours bugging you too?”

“Lots of  ‘subtle’ hints.”

They both laughed at that, quietly at first but ending loud enough to send a flock of Taillow from the trees.

“Oops,” Ren said, still chuckling. “Should we head down to the estuary?”

“Probably,” he said, and she pulled him to his feet as if he wasn’t a good stone heavier than she was. “I’m still not used to how strong you are.”

“It’s the judo,” she said with a broad grin and flexed, patting her bicep. “And you’re one to talk.” She poked his arm as they started off down the hill. “I saw you scurry up a tree like a Sentret yesterday.”

“I like climbing. My dad and I used to go all the time.”

“After that it was so easy. I probably should have known it was all going too fast, but I guess that’s just how I’ve always been.”

I think it’s one of your finer qualities. But I suppose I don’t have the same sensibilities as a human.  

“Well I think that’s a strange sensibility for an immortal, but thanks all the same.”

#ORAS #nuzlocke #storylocke #Ren #Kai #Jay #Taraki #lgbtq #chapter

[facets-and-rainbows]

Blue Exorcist: Spy Game - Yukio in Wonderland (part 5)

The fifth (and final!) part of the crackiest crack I’ve ever read in an officially sanctioned book, dragged kicking and screaming into the Anglosphere for your viewing pleasure.

If you thought Yuki(k)o was having a rough time before, just wait till MEPHISTO gets involved...

Previous parts: 1 2 3 4

“You mean it’s…a dream? All of this?”

“Yes, a dream.”

Faced with Yukio’s suspicious gaze, Mephisto nodded dramatically.

“But not the same sort of dream your kind usually have when you sleep at night. This is a dream caused by demons.”

“Demons?” Yukio raised an eyebrow behind his glasses.

“Yes,” Mephisto nodded gleefully. “There’s a type of demon called Húdié, kin of Beelzebub, King of Insects. They look like normal butterflies at first glance, but they have a troublesome taste for trickery…They parasitize humans and give them nightmares, so they can feed off of the victim’s negative emotions—embarrassment, shock, hatred, despair, and so on.”

“You’re telling me these Húdié are parasitizing me?”

Even as Yukio said it, his mind went to the insect sounds he heard when he woke up, and the black butterflies he kept seeing everywhere.

Could those have been—?

 “Well, it’s not as though they’ll take your life. Why not think of this as a rare opportunity to experience—“

“How can I get back to my world right now?”

“My goodness,” Mephisto sighed at Yukio, who was glaring at him without the slightest hint of wanting to listen to what he had to say. “It’s really quite simple. You just need to let them wake up.”

“…” Hearing this, Yukio hesitated a little. Then he started pinching his own cheeks, forcing his eyelids open…anything to give himself the right stimulus.

Mephisto grinned, his eyes narrowing to threads as he did it.

“Um, I’ll ask just in case, Okumura-sensei, but what exactly are you doing?”

“Hm? Well, I was trying to wake up, like you said…” Yukio answered hesitantly. Mephisto immediately burst out laughing. He clutched his stomach and rolled around, paralyzed with hilarity.

“Wha-?!”

“Oh, my apologies. That isn’t what I meant. I meant you need to wake the demons up. Hehehe.”

Yukio looked at Mephisto, who still couldn’t contain his laughter, with an indescribable expression.

Mephisto stopped cackling like a monster and added, “In other words, you need to make the Húdié realize that they won’t get anything out of this. Act as though you don’t see this nightmare as a nightmare—quite the contrary! You love this situation and enjoy it to the fullest. This will deprive the Húdié of their sustenance, forcing them to release you and seek out another host.”

“Enjoy this situation?”

Yukio’s face twitched subconsciously.

There was no way he could do it.

But if he wanted to get out of this ridiculous world, he was going to have to try.

He clenched his teeth and braced himself.

“What…exactly…do I have to do?” he asked, swallowing his self-esteem.

Mephisto had apparently been waiting for this moment. He took a sketchbook out of a desk drawer.

The first page said “SDE5” in massive letters. Yukio raised an eyebrow and asked, “SDE5? What does that stand for? System Director…Enterprises?”

“No, it stands for Song and Dance Exorcists.”

“Come again?”

It’s the name of an upcoming idol group based around a singing, dancing, all-female exorcist unit! ♪ The members are Ren Shima, Ryuko Suguro, Koneko Miwa, Rin Okumura…and you!”

“…”

“The twins are SDE’s biggest draw. Plus, you exorcise demons and can even work with hymns and sutras. Oh, and the producer will be me, Mephisto☆ Looking forward to it!” Mephisto giggled cutely.

“I’m afraid I’m going to have to refuse,” came Yukio’s cold, immediate reply.

Mephisto’s response was like a slap to the face. “So I take it you’re prepared to go on living in this dream forever?”

“!!”

“You could always try waiting until the Húdié get their fill, but alas, they can be quite the gluttons and there’s no telling when that will happen. Will you endure this world until then? Can you?”

“…” Yukio was at a loss for words.

It hurt to admit it, but he did want to avoid that outcome. Anything to keep from being taken over by Yukiko…

It’s the only way, he thought, and he made his bitter choice.

“If I join this ‘SDE5’…can you guarantee I’ll be able to escape this place?” he asked, his voice shaking with disgust.

Mephisto nodded and said “Yes,” grinning ear-to-ear.

He casually flipped to the next page of the sketchbook, revealing a most likely handmade illustration of Yukio and the other four wearing cute, positively idol-like outfits. It was creepily well drawn.

“You’ll start as an indie idol group, gather a phenomenal amount of support, and go major. The group will gradually grow from just the five of you to a grand total of forty-nine. As their leader, you’ll keep the members together, sometimes butting heads with them, sometimes crying with them, always strengthening the group’s unity. You’ll bond with your fans at meet and greets, sell CDs of your newest single…and when you finally defeat your twin sister and greatest rival to rise to the top of the popularity polls, you’ll give a tearful thank you speech…and then you should be able to return safely to your world.”

“… By the way…How many days is this going to take?”

“Oh, I’d say about five years?”

“THAT’S TOO LONG!!”

Yukio slammed his fist down on the desk in anger, causing Mephisto to jump back in overdramatic surprise.

“I can’t say I’m impressed by you yelling at a lady like that, Okumura-sensei. Are you sure you’re getting enough calcium in your diet?”

“Urgh…I’m sorry…It was unlike me to lose my temper like that, and…wait, what lady are you talking about?”

“What do you mean? I’m right in front of you.”

“Huh?” Yukio stared wide-eyed at Mephisto, who was sighing wistfully.

“…I’m sorry. You really don’t look any different from usual to me.”

“What are you saying? I’d expect better from you, Okumura-sensei. Of course I’m different. Just look.” Mephisto stroked her own chin.

It was true, the goatee was gone. Yukio started to feel lightheaded.

“So…having no beard makes you a woman?”

“Well, gender doesn’t mean much to demons in the first place. We can take any number of forms just by using different vessels, after all. But enough about me. We should be focusing on your Húdié problem right now, shouldn’t we?”

Yukio was clearly making a weird face, but he answered “Yes” to Mephisto’s sudden sane question. Mephisto set the sketchbook down on the desk and leaned back in the chair lazily.

“So, if we set the SDE5 idea aside for now and try to think of a way for you to more quickly experience the joys of your life as a woman…” she began, smiling with her eyes. Yukio leaned forward with an earnest look on his face.

Mephisto, who was gazing at Yukio in amusement, clapped her hands and said:

“Come work at the luxury hostess club Faust. You can start today!”

“What?!”

“For your stage name…let’s see…we’ll call you Yukkii after your real name Yukiko. You should aim to become the number one cabaret girl there.”

“…”

“I’ll stay by your side to teach you all you need to know about entertaining customers. With your looks you could become number one in three—no, two months. Oh, and when you wake up from the dream only two minutes or so will have passed in your time, so there’s no need to worry. You won’t end up like Rip van Winkle,” Mephisto announced with a smile.

As Yukio stood motionless, rooted to the spot, Mephisto snapped her fingers and held up an SLR camera.

“We’ll just take your cast photos for now. Let’s see…You have such big breasts, we can’t not take advantage of that. How about a shot where you rest your chin on both hands, so that it emphasizes your cleavage?

Yukio instinctively edged away from the camera’s gaze.

Mephisto, on the other hand, stood up from her chair and started edging closer.

“Come now, your expression looks so stiff! Smile, smile!”

“…”

“Hmm…I suppose you are the sort of overly straight-laced, studious type that’s lacking in raw sex appeal. Maybe we should be bold and open up your neckline a little more, go for that gap moe look. …Right, after the headshots we’ll move on to some full-body shots. What do you think of getting down on all fours like a tigress?

“?!”

“Okay, I’m taking it now. Smile, and make it brighter than that! Give me your best smile! Come on! Picture yourself snatching up all that money and recognition from the customers!”

“…N-No…I…”

“Come on, you’re making such an awkward face. Make it cuter, sexier, more devilish! Not like that! We’re not taking a student ID photo here. You’ll never be number one at this rate!

“LIKE ANYONE WOULD EVER EVEN WANT THAT!!”

Yukio finally reached his breaking point. He started shouting—and the world went dark.

He thought he saw the fluttering of that black butterfly, almost lost in the pitch-black darkness…

As he floated through the darkness, Yukio kept thinking, over and over:

I’m done being Yukiko.

I’ve had enough of the world of girls.

Being a boy is what’s right for me.

I want to go back to being a boy as soon as I can…

I miss my male brother and everyone else. I want to go back to my world, the world where I belong.

If I can just go home, I promise…I’ll be manlier than anyone else on the planet.

I’m a man. A man.

“Yuki…Hey, Yuki…Get up already.”

It was his brother’s voice.

It may have sounded like he was yelling from far away, but this time it was definitely his brother’s voice.

“Yuki…Hey…Yuki…”

“Mmmm…” Yukio forced his heavy eyelids open.

The first thing he saw, aside from the bright morning light, was the familiar face of his brother. Not his sister, but his brother.

Is everything back to normal…? But how?

As he asked himself, he came to the conclusion that the Húdié must have finally gotten full off the stress from his final tirade. In a way, you could even say it was all thanks to Mephisto.

“You’re running late, Yukio. We’re supposed to meet up with Suguro and the guys today, remember?”

“Thank goodness…Nii-san, you’re back to—“

Yukio smiled and started to talk, but then he froze.

As it turned out, his brother was completely ripped from the neck down—even a professional bodybuilder would have turned tail and run from him.

 “First we’ll hit the gym, then break for some protein bars, then back to the gym for more strength training, then we’ll get all the protein we need at all-you-can-eat sukiyaki!”

“…”

Yukio boggled vacantly at the muscles of steel wrapped in a martial-arts style white gi (which had the sleeves torn off, for some reason)—at his manly brother.

 Out of the corner of his eye, he could see two Húdié now, fluttering around cheerfully…

#what even was this story #blue exorcist #Ao no Exorcist #blue exorcist novel #spy game #translation

[abs0luteb4stard]

One of the worst experiences with a doctor I've ever had.

So a week or two ago I went to a new psychiatrist. I asked if my mom could come in for my first session but this doctor said she'd prefer to have me come in first alone.

I didn't like it, but I thought I'll do it. That for the 2nd half of the session my mom could come in. Then add the session went on I thought perhaps she'll come in for the next time.

So she took my vitals and dais my heart rate and blood pressure were up. I said "well I'm nervous."

Then in the session all the standard questions and background and stuff. But I dunno I felt like she was "off" something in tone of voice or whatever.

Then she asked if I was on disability. I said I'm not sure I think, I forget what it's called.

She said "... Because we don't do disability consults here."

I said "I'm not here for that, and I think the government sends you to a doctor they choose anyway don't they? (I knew that much).

She said "typically they do."

In my head I already feel like she's looking down on me from on high.

Also she said on the questionnaire tablet I said my pain is high rated. And that I need to exercise to get my fibromyalgia under control. I said I have other physical problems. I told her what they were. She said you can't control those were gonna work with what we can control.

But those problems impact my physical activity. And they make my fibromyalgia activate pretty often.

But I left the office with a sense of her being cold to my issues. I tried to stay open. Perhaps it is just her "process".

"Next time", I thought.

I'll do these things, I allowed her to increase my medication. I'll go home and lightly exercise. Etc.

Out in the lobby my mom said how did it go? I said quizzically I think it's alright.

My mom said you didn't need me for the second half? I said I didn't really have a chance to say much I was answering all her questions. I didn't think of it.

My mom asked if I'd like her to go with me to talk to the doctor for a second. I said yes.

So we walked down the hall and my mom said that we felt she left my mom out and that why couldn't she be part of the session. She said "she doesn't see parents, she sees adults".

And my mom said because people with mental health issues need support and she's my support. That we don't have secrets and that kind of stuff. We speak openly about everything in our family.

I was nervous this whole thing I looked up and that doctor looked perturbed, and I saw she was judging my mom with her expression. Like my mom's some saboteur or controller. So she shooed us out, said we'll discuss next time, my mom apologized and the doctor closed her door.

I thought "We'll discuss it next time" was "we" including my mom.

In the interim I was supposed to see a psychologist she assigned me. But I didn't go one day because I had flared up fibromyalgia. Then I didn't go the second time because my dad with his stroke issues he was awake half the night confused and thinking he had to go to work or do something that's from long ago. So I was dog tired and just couldn't wake up.

So fast forward to yesterday:

I figured if she's says no to my mom coming in today then I'm not going in until she says yes.

So not only that but she shows up with the guy I cancelled 2 appointments on.

(Now I looked him up the day before yesterday. He's got some shit reviews or two. On doctor rating pages. It could be genuine or a disgruntled patient. But it made me wonder because I already felt snubbed by the lady psychiatrist)

Now I felt an ambush. But I tried to keep cool. She just wants to introduce him to me to get me to feel comfortable maybe. Okay think positive, right?

So I said can my mom come back with us this time?

She said "no I prefer to speak only with you."

I got loud because now my anxiety boiled over in one millisecond flat.

I said them "I said fine, she doesn't go back with me, theni don't go. I'm the patient and I want my mom there." It's my right!.

And she totally dismissed me! Like "fine".

Not as in fine my mom can come in, but fine then I guess you don't want help.

Human compassion? It didn't exist there.

My mom tried to talk to her plead our reasoning and case. But I was already deaf to everything. I can't remember much of what my mom said.

My mom said we can do the session here in the lobby nobody is here. I said "why? What's the point? She's the doctor, she's got a diploma she's the boss."

But that doctor kept turning and whispering and murmuring to that psychologist guy She had a half smirk. Like how about you share with the whole class?

I said something about her whispering like "talk amongst yourselves motherfucker"

And that doctor had this instigatory tone and said "well, I think I know what happened, why you cancelled your sessions [with the psychologist]."

I was taken back. I was like in my head thinking you do? You read minds? Your like a fictional psychologist/detective that can be like Sherlock Holmes and figure out shit from literally no information?

So I said it. I said "what are you a fucking psychic now? You know what I cancelled? Why don't you enlighten us motherfucker?"

My mom said in her diplomatic wss you do not know. He had a flare up pf his pain. Etc.

But before my mom could go further.

The doctor said "well I think you've made yourself clear, you made your choice" to me.

I had it.

I said "No, you made it clear when you said my mother couldn't come in! I do have a choice, but you made it!"

I continued with every variation of fuck I could create, but I ramped it up. I was cut deep. My whole soul said "How dare you".

If I'm done here, I'm going out saying what's on my mind. Nuclear fucking fission. Just Burn down the whole situation.

I said things like "get the fuck out of here, fucking asshole liar motherfucker"

I can't remember because I was so beyond upset now. That kind of high school whispering about me to her buddy fucking triggered that second meltdown. This was "Fuck-a-shima" (pun).

Hell was walking the earth.

She said that "I'll call the police".

I said "call them motherfucker, stupid bitch. I know half of them." (I don't know any of them, lol - I was so mad I was just random)

She said "I will"

I said "call the fucking Army you're gonna need them motherfucker."

I said "I'm not hanging my fucking head and let anyone walk over me. I did that long enough." "I'm a person and I have rights."

I mean I wasn't asking for her to change the world, I'm asking for my mom to come in to the session and help me.

This kind of doctor had betrayed her Hippocratic Oath. She's never helped anyone. She's never "cured" anyone.

She's a pretentious entitled fucking asshole.

Like my best friend told me "it sounds like she wanted to lord over you".

That's the word or description I couldn't find in my anguish. That's how it felt. It was like I had no say in the direction of my care. Like I was a lab rat and not a human being.

They had the power. There's no winning an argument with such a "doctor". There's no winning in any argument. Mutually assured destruction. She'll keep her cool because she's holding all the cards. She's in power.

So fuck it, I'll salt the fucking earth then.

She has my medical file. She knows my issues, she would still have no compassion? She would still cut me off from my only help of family? To what make me "independent"?

Then on top of that to manipulate me with her whispering, and pompous attitude and flash judgement saying "I think I can figure out why you cancelled"? And all that shit?

What kind of sick fucking doctor are you?

I've never been treated like that by any psych doctors. They've all let my mom come in with me. Then when I'm comfortable my mom doesn't come in anymore. She helps me to remember all my medical stuff and when I'm nervous with new people I forget stuff.

She's my mom. People say all the time 'their mom is their rock' or something. To me that's a platitude.

My parents are my left and right hands. Their my spirit and my flesh. To say they're my rock or support or whatever idioms is a gross understatement.

That's what killed me inside yesterday. They don't get it. And they don't want to. And they don't care. To say it was infuriating would be a lie. I don't have the vocabulary to explain it. I don't have the vocabulary to explain 80% of how I felt yesterday.

You come for help, to try again to keep the hurt at bay, to correct the past that wad inflicted on you. And you take away my freedom and my trust?

You build trust with a patient, not walls.

I mean what if there was a patient there in my place who was actively suicidal in the lobby?

Broken the 6th floor window and ready to jump? You gonna turn your face and whisper to your colleague about them in front of them?

I feel sorry for their next patient.

But I'm not feeling sorry. They deserved every syllable.

My mom apologized to me for finding this doctor. That was another thing that cut me. It's not her fault.

I said "you shouldn't be sorry. I'm not sorry. That bitch won't let you come in with me, fuck her, I'm not sorry. And you shouldn't be."

If I had known that doctor would make my mom feel sorry to me about this whole mess, I probably could have punched her in the mouth.

My mom doesn't need to be sorry. Ever. Especially not for someone else's heartlessness to me/us.

That was that doctor's unprofessional and cold approach. She has no respect for the patient or people.

#anxiety #ptsd #psychiatry #psychiatrist #psychologist #bad doctors #terrible day #bad people #meltdown #asshole doctors #my journal #my post #personal #anger #bullies #bullying #terminal psychotic #help me #help me god #i hate this world #people are the worst