#online school has been tough and dealing with it

[ystrike1]

I Matched With Our Company President -Dating For Marriage Is Sweet And Serious- - By Ori (7.5/10)

Serious issues. Adult problems. Responsibilities. Board meetings. Those aren't elements that you usually want in a yandere story. This one is about two pining lovers, who waited ten years to finally click.

Shinji and Hina are both strange people.

Hina has issues with intimacy. She has never been on a single date, and she only had one crush in high school. She's got an extremely avoidant personality that kinda...gets in the way of her enjoying life in general? The story opens with one of Hina's work friends lecturing her. That friend is worried, because Hina clearly has missed out on alot. Now she's an abnormally naive 27 year old, who has no idea who to approach marriage.......

....even though she works with bridal companies....

Gasp. Awkward.

Hina really does seem like a side character. Her boss is named Shinji, and yes he is her high school crush. It's a fated meeting. A once in a lifetime chance...but she tiptoes around him. She actually pretends that she doesn't know him, even though they were close for a few years back in school.

She's intimidated by him because he's popular. The CEO's daughter wants to marry him. He's handsome etc...

He corners her.

He somehow??? knows she's been using a dating app??? He CONFRONTS her about it. She chatted with someone on the app. She suspected it was him, but she didn’t know for sure....and she avoided him online too.

She's completely shocked when Shinji, her Shinji, appears in front of her very upset about being ghosted.

He immediately takes her out to dinner.

It's expensive.

He drops that he does remember her, and he's kinda hurt that she was cold to him.

Especially since they had ANOTHER fated meeting on the dating app. Shinji was using the app for research purposes, because they also work with matchmaking companies.

He reached out to her because he really didn't want to lose his chance.

Then she ghosted.

Then he hunted her down at work the way any normal, well-adjusted, popular man would.

....

...yeah...

....yeah....

He's not letting her waste their fated (2) meetings. He loved her back in high school, and she wasn't just his crush. He wanted to date seriously.

Hina does remember him and all, but she was willing to date a new man.

He's...a little too serious.

Hina doesn't want to rush.

She says she will date him casually. So they can get to know each other again.

She does get jealous though...and insecure because Shinji is popular.

Ok. It gets serious.

Shinji is popular, but he isn't very romantically experienced either. Actually, he seems deeply traumatized. His parents didn't abuse him. He had friends, but Shinji is his own worst enemy. He pushes himself to be perfect, and he never lets his guard down. Back in high school he couldn't confess to Hina....because he had a stalker. Stalking is a HUGE issue in Japan, and it's believable when you listen to his story. Dealing with the stalker ruined his high school life, and he lost contact with Hina. She assumed he moved/got a girlfriend/didn't like her.

Shinji and Hina are both tired of being left behind. They're tired of losing out. They're tired of being careful. They don't want to settle for an ok partner. Shinji in particular really wants a loving and perfect relationship with a woman that doesn't expect too much.

I know that sounds bad but hear me out.

Shinji isn't actually a Domineering Corporate Alpha in private. He was burnt out in high school. Hina noticed how tired he was. He wants a caring, loving partner. Not an Alpha Woman who sees him as a status symbol. Shinji is totally a coward, because he refuses to let his true personality show.......but yeah being an Alpha dude sounds hard and draining and annoying. I'd want a wife who likes my true self too, if i was in his weird situation.

It's honestly too real.

Shinji has to act tough to make money.

Hina can't be bold in her job as a secretary.

They both run into trouble socializing, but dang it they wanna marry and be happy too!!!

Kunihiro.

Kunihiro. Kunihiro. Kunihiro.

The incel character.

I really hate to see it in EROTIC BOOKS FOR WOMEN, but for some reason male mental health is a big part of the story.

Kunihiro fell in love with a woman who only wanted to hook up. She led him on for a bit but SHE HONESTLY TOLD HIM SHE DIDN'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP. She was quite clear...........but Kunihiro went off the rails and he started using his looks to "prey on women in love"?????

????da fuk???

Shinji is popular. When women fall in love with him Kunihiro picks them up, and he USES THEM because "women" are "easily swayed and their feelings aren't deep"

Bro.

If I fell in love with my unrealistically perfect boss I would GIVE UP, and look for love elsewhere. It's normal???????? Also its super screwed up that you treated those women like used goods, just because they had a crush before.

Literal human vomit I can't even.

Shinji is almost too gentle to be a yandere, but he is really weird, and he is willing to fight this scumfuk.

He waited a decade.

He chased Hina down in the office when she tried to ghost him, but he means well. He really does, and he most certainly did not play with women or become disillusioned with love. Even though his stalker made his life hell he still wants his happy marriage!!!

He's a great guy!

#yandere #male yandere #yandere male #yandere boy #recommendations #recs #rec #recommended #I Matched With Our Company President -Dating For Marriage Is Sweet And Serious-

[boyguk]

Kovis ('tough guy') by Käärijä | fin -> eng trans.

Kovis is a word with a mocking undertone, Finns usually use this word while talking about people like immature teenage boys who act tougher than they actually are. The whole song is about dealing with someone who's a difficult and immature person to be around. I decided to translate some bits very literally and add context to some of the words and expressions he uses, mostly because a more liberal english translation alone probably wouldn't fully convey how much he's mocking the person and their juvenile behavior.

[VERSE]

Voi hyvä tavaton mietin missä sun käytöstavat on hä -> My goodness, I’m wondering where your manners are, huh

Sä kohtelet muita ku *avanto* niin kylmästi et oon sanaton -> You treat others so coldly it’s like *ice swimming*, it leaves me speechless *(avanto = the actual hole in the ice, but English doesn’t have a word for something that specific. He's basically saying the person is about as pleasant as a swim in ice cold water – when you swim in an avanto the coldness usually shocks your body and it's difficult to talk because of it)

Tekis mieli vetää sua lettii mut en oo sellane -> I feel like smacking you but I’m not like that

Oot olevinas mikä lie bossman tääl, mut *sun nokka on keltane* -> You act like you’re some kind of a bossman here, but *your beak is yellow* *(he’s saying the person is a 'keltanokka' = a beginner/‘junior', someone who doesn’t know what they’re doing)

Se on pelkkää puppuu ja legendaa ku sulla aukee suu -> When you open your mouth, it's all nonsense and lies

Sun kylien kovan jätkän maine on valheilla maustettuu -> Your tough guy reputation has been seasoned with lies

Teet niin hiton tyhmii juttui että mietin onks sun *pää puut* -> You do things so damn stupid that it makes me wonder if your *head is made of wood* *(puupää = someone who’s dumb, the word's more humorous than offensive despite the meaning)

Ja muut miettii hätäpoistumisteitä kun sä tuut -> And when you come around, the others think about emergency exits

[BRIDGE]

Ei näin, ei missään nimes näin -> Not like this, absolutely not like this *(a better, less literal translation would be something like "don't act like this, absolutely do not act like this")

Sul on *finkut pystys* heti kun sä tuut -> *Your fingers are up* as soon as you arrive *(I think he means they've got a bad attitude, like they've got their middle fingers up all the time)

Ei näin, ei missään nimes näin -> Not like this, absolutely not like this

Polemiikkii syntyy heti kun sä tuut -> A controversy/quarrel occurs as soon as you arrive

[CHORUS]

Jäbä hei ei tollasel asenteella tääl päin tehdä kavereita -> Dude, you don't make friends 'round here with an attitude like that

Ei olla enää *yläasteella* senkin kovis -> We're not in *junior high* anymore, you tough guy *(the Finnish school system is a bit complex, but 'yläaste' is for people between the ages of 13 and 15 before they start high school at 16. It's hell, it's horror, teens that age are terrible so absolutely no one enjoys yläaste. TL;DR he's saying the person still acts like a childish teenager)

Ei tollasel asenteella tääl päin saa ku avareita -> Here an attitude like that will only get you bitch slapped

Ei olla enää *yläasteella* senkin kovis -> We're not in *junior high* anymore, you tough guy

[VERSE]

Oot niinku ne nettipalstojen *sankarit* jotka postaa -> You're like *those heroes* who post online *(sarcasm, guess he's talking about people who are shitty, rude, and annoying online)

(Vittu mitä pask–) Miks sun pitää olla tollanen kovis -> (Fuck this sh–) Why do you have to be a tough guy like that

Jonka puheenvuoro on ku *battle freestyle, ota rewind* -> It's like *a freestyle battle when it's your turn to speak, hit rewind* *(I think he means that the person thinks they're free to say anything they want without caring about how offensive they're being, and that they think every conversation is like a battle they have to somehow 'win'. He's telling the person to hit rewind to rethink their words)

Sillä nää bileet ei oo mitkää mihi tullaan käyttäytyy noin -> Because this party isn't a place where you can act like that

Sä hiffaat sen ennen pitkää jos tuut näyttäytyy noin -> You'll eventually get it/notice it if you continue to be like that

Sä et lähde pois vaa *intät* vastaa ja se suututtaa muut -> You don't leave, you just continue to *bicker/insist* and it makes everyone mad *(inttää = (to) insist, but the tone of that word is belittling/ridiculing/dismissive. If a kid at a grocery store is being whiny, annoying, and continues to insist that they want a lollipop even after their parent has told them 'no', that's the vibe of 'inttää'. If you call someone's arguments or behavior 'inttäminen' you're basically dismissing their words/behavior while calling them a bit childish)

Voit tehä u-käännöksen ens kerral kun sä tuut -> The next time you come, you can/should do a U-turn

[BRIDGE]

Ei näin, ei missään nimes näin -> Not like this, absolutely not like this

Sul on *finkut pystys* heti kun sä tuut -> *Your fingers are up* as soon as you arrive

Ei näin, ei missään nimes näin -> Not like this, absolutely not like this

Polemiikkii syntyy heti kun sä tuut -> A controversy/quarrel occurs as soon as you arrive

[CHORUS]

Jäbä hei ei tollasel asenteella tääl päin tehdä kavereita -> Dude, you don't make friends 'round here with an attitude like that

Ei olla enää *yläasteella* senkin kovis -> We're not in *junior high* anymore, you tough guy

Ei tollasel asenteella tääl päin saa ku avareita -> Here an attitude like that will only get you bitch slapped

Ei olla enää yläasteella senkin kovis -> We're not in junior high anymore, you tough guy

[And then he continues to repeat parts of the chorus before the song ends]

#*throws this to the non-finnish speaking rats living in the käärijä sewer of tumblr* feasteth my children #translated this cause I was bored and I noticed that there's no eng trans available tee hee #lmk if something's weird/confusing/misspelled! <3 #edit: noticed so many typos + grammar mistakes + missing words right after posting this gjfghgfh maybe I'll edit this when I have more time #käärijä

[ninapi]

Glitched

○●○●○●○●●○●○●○●○●●○●○●○●○●

Premise: Rintarou unexpectedly meets the girl of his dreams through an online game and he does his best to find this mysterious girl in the real world and keep her for good.

Word Count: 3289

Note: Hello, my beautiful dumplings. Welcome to my Suna miniseries, huhuhu. This will be a short story (4 chapters lol sorry, that’s my definition of short 🙃 sometimes I wonder how people write complete stories under 800 words, I just cant-), while I prepare for my new big series. Some high school drama, no multiple endings or routes just one~ Smooches for all of you.

Warning: Mild spoilers, if you’re up to date with the anime you’ll be just fine.

Chapter 1: Not so bad.

Suna Rintarou was by no means enjoying his second year of high school. Summer weather was definitely not his favorite, always tough on him, but the agony was even worse this year. He was tired, not just physically but mentally, the toll of dealing not only with his own sense of failure but also his teammates who were gravely disappointed of not being able to give their captain the satisfaction of going to the finals and bring victory to their school in his last year on the team.

It hasn’t been long since Inarizaki lost to Karasuno, which meant the practice schedule has increased not only in frequency but also in intensity. Days were very long and every single muscle in Suna’s body hurt. He was really looking forward to the holiday weekend, meaning he would have an extra day to rest.

His classmates were raving about this new online game that had recently come out and was very popular. They had plans to play together during the weekend and advance into one of the heaviest of dungeons before classes resumed, but their plan came to a sudden stop, the twins were being dragged by their mother into a family wedding across the country and they wouldn’t be able to join the team.

The boys were devastated, whining men heard all over the class. They were really counting on the Miya power to beat the hell out of the dungeon boss, help was needed desperately.

¨Hey Suna, I know you said you didn’t like the gameplay you watched the other day but can you please join our team? Without Osamu in our side we are doomed.¨ Suna heaved a deep sigh, collapsing on top of his desk. ¨Am I your last option? Can’t you find someone who really wants to play this? I’m so tired, I was planning on staying in bed all weekend.¨ Osamu pulled him back up, giving him a stern look, ¨Come on, help your mates. I wish I could stay and beat them up but there’s nothing we can do about it, it’s just for this weekend, we’ll be back for the next and continue where you left off.¨ he really didn’t want to do this, but if he didn’t agree to it they wouldn’t shut up until he did, ¨Fine, text me the link. I’ll be there after dinner.¨ the boys were smothering him with hugs and trying to kiss off his face in joy, making him grimace as he shook them all off and went back to sleep on his very comfy desk. The thought of finally resting this weekend turning into nothing but a sad memory.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☾ . :☆ﾟ.･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.･

The guys added him to a group chat and everything was ready for the first quest. 

His sister tied his hair up at the front in a tiny ponytail so he would look like some of those cute game-streamers she watches, not caring if her brother needed it or not with his hairstyle. He was beyond annoyed with life in general, why do people not leave him alone, even his sister was now conspiring to destroy his peaceful long holiday weekend, ¨Curse those damn twins. It’s all their fault.¨ he was grumbling under his breath while putting his headset on and going in the game to create his character.

¨Alright guys, let’s go level up first, stay in this area and let’s meet up at the bottom of the hill when you reach level 20, then we’ll move in to the forest.¨ they all hummed in acknowledgement, breaking the group. Suna went off to chase some slimes and smaller monsters, hating his life every second of it, the game had a very cute looking art style and it was just not his jam at all. He found it hilarious though that the toughest guys in his class were all hunting cute rabbits and crying over it out loud and in their shared group chat space, so he made sure to screenshot some of those moments, posting them in his account and tagging all his playmates. He had to get something out of this torture, at least he could make fun of them for a while.

His character stopped moving and it turned into a pixel block, ¨Guys, is the game acting up or is it just mine?¨ he could only hear static coming through his headset and some of the guys were posting on the chat that the game kicked them out and they were rebooting their pc, so he just stayed there waiting for the rest to go back in. His character was still a bit glitchy but it was moving now. Then all of the sudden he heard a very loud screech pressed to his left ear, and he was positive that it was not human. ¨Oh my god, sausage! What are you doing to my poor headset? Leave it alone!!¨ saying he was confused was an understatement, all the players in his team were dudes, ¨Ehm, hi?¨ the line went quiet but he wasn’t hearing any more static, just some shuffling on the other side, ¨Who’s this?¨ you were sitting on your chair now, the fluff ball being kicked out of your room for good. ¨Uhm, Rintarou? How about you? Did the guys call you over? I didn’t hear anything about any girl joining our party.¨ Rintarou? What- you were just chatting with your girlfriends when your cat jumped on you and stole your headset, there was no Rintarou in that group, ¨I'm (Y/N). Are you Miyuki’s boyfriend?¨ Miyuki? Was there a Miyuki in his class? It was possible, not like he knows everybody but this was all so confusing, ¨Nope, definitely not that Rintarou. So you are not with the guys either? How did you get into the group? The game didn’t say someone new joined the party.¨ 

You were so confused, you could see your actual party on the screen and on the side chat but you couldn’t hear them talk, just this random guy, ¨Did your game get glitchy too? Maybe that’s how you ended up in my party.¨ he moved his character around, looking for you, but he was completely alone in the area, some of the guys still complaining about the game not letting them in through his phone. ¨Well, I mean yes. It did get glitchy but I can still see my girls playing on my screen, could it be just the audio that got crossed over somehow?¨ it was so weird, none of the girls even noticed your absence, you said you were having some troubles with your headset and so they just continued killing monsters, ¨Yeah, I don’t see you around me either, so I guess it’s just the audio getting messy. Hold on, Imma log out and see if that resets us back to normal.¨ you nodded even if he couldn’t see you. ¨Ugh, what the hell. The logout button is gone. How about you, do you see it?¨ you were checking everywhere in your screen, it was definitely not where it usually is, ¨It’s gone for me too. I bet it’s just still glitchy and will go back to normal in a bit, if it’s fine with you, we could just keep playing like this until the game fixes itself?¨ he was already back to killing slimes, way over level 20 by now and his classmates were still gone, ¨Yeah, fine with me.¨ 

Both of you continued doing your thing in complete silence, so much so that Suna forgot you were still there and started mumbling curses quietly, he was being targeted by larger monsters now and was still on his own, he didn’t know much about this game and he was loosing HP fast, ¨What’s wrong?¨ your soft voice startled him, his ears flushing bright red in embarrassment, ¨Sorry, I forgot you were still there. Just being attacked by inferno wolves, don’t know how to kill them, today is my first day playing this.¨ you chuckled quietly, he was kindda cute, those were very easy to kill lesser monsters, ¨Just jump on them and stomp hard.¨ he did as instructed, killing one instantly, ¨Oh wow that was easy, thanks. Are you like a guild master or something?¨ that made you smile, you were right, he was cute. ¨Nothing of the sort, just been playing this for longer. Let me know if you need more help, I know my fair share of tricks.¨ 

･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☾ . :☆ﾟ.･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.･

He was about to just ‘x’ out the game since the logout button was still gone, it was 9:30 and none of the guys were able to log back in, the game refusing to accept them, it was a waste of time, he didn’t even want to play this ridiculous game, the happy tune coming out of it was driving him insane at this point, that was until he heard your quiet giggles, it made him curious. They started soft, he almost thought he’d imagined it, but they grew louder each second and without realizing it, he was smiling, ¨What is it?¨ he wasn’t going to say anything but he just needed to know what was causing the cute fit of giggles on the other side, or he wasn’t going to be able to sleep in peace. ¨You heard that? Oh no, so embarrassing. Sorry, my cat, he is crazy you see. Earlier he was chewing on my headset so I kicked him out, but he got out of the house and got back into my room climbing all the way to the window, he’s like a ninja! And was nuzzling my tummy just now, I’m very ticklish.¨ was it normal for such a story to be this cute? Since when does he find cat ninjas cute? Why does he feel the need to tickle an unknown woman-

¨Was that sausage?¨ he chuckled evilly, wanting to continue the conversation, ¨Oh GOD, you heard that too? This game is like boycotting my life, I’m telling you. But yes, that’s sausage. He’s very heavy and of a brownish tone so he kindda looks like one, that’s why we named him that.¨ it’s not like he was interested in cats, but this was way better than killing blue pixel blobs, ¨It’s kay, I find names like that fun, I really don’t like when people name their pets, I don’t know Steve or something,¨ that caused you to laugh loud and clear, getting stabbed by a monster in the process, which made you just laugh even more, ¨Steve? What? Who would name their cat Steve?¨ you let your character bleed to death and were now hugging one of your pillows while sipping on some juice you had left, getting comfy on your chair. ¨Believe it or not, I’ve seen things, specially since I got in my current school volleyball team, there you see crazy, crazy stuff.¨ so he played volleyball…you’re nowhere near athletic but damn, he sounded like an interesting individual. The night was nothing like what you expected it to be, it was getting better every second.

Time surely flies when you’re actually having fun. He got some fruit jelly out and was chewing on it while speaking, needing some extra sugar to stay awake longer, ¨Are you eating fruit jelly?¨ he sits up right away, making sure his cam was actually off, ¨How do you know? Is this game livestreaming now or-?¨ you wished, ¨Hahaha no, it’s just that they make this sound, you know what I mean? Like when you suck the jelly out? I know I’m weird, I’m so sorry.¨ was he making sucking sounds just now? Why was he blushing? He didn’t know his favorite snack made suggestive sounds, well, that was embarrassing, he didn’t do that on purpose, ¨Ugh, well yeah you got me there, I’m eating fruit jelly. But I don’t think you’re that weird. Just a bit.¨ now you were the one blushing, it was fun talking to him, you've been talking about everything and nothing in particular at the same time for the last couple of hours and it was nearly midnight now. ¨Hey, is your game still glitchy? My chara is like dead now but still let’s me talk to you, I think there’s something really wrong with this game today.¨ his character was sitting down on a daisy field, enjoying his life as much as his owner, no monsters in sight, but the logout button was still not available, ¨Yeah, well I’m not dead, but things look the same, my mates were also complaining because the game kicked them out and didn’t let them back in.¨ he actually lied to his classmates and told them he was going to bed like twenty minutes ago but he just wasn’t capable of telling you how tired he actually was, ¨Hm, yeah I don’t think it’s going to let us sign out tonight, should we leave it open and just go to bed? It’s getting late and even if there’s no school tomorrow we should probably get going.¨ so you were in school too, your voice sounded right about his age but he didn’t know how to ask without sounding like a creepy old man, ¨Yeah I was thinking of going to bed too but sausage wouldn’t let us go.¨ us, huh? you smiled bashfully, playing with the headset cord, ¨Sausage is like that, I think he likes to hear your voice.¨ oh boy, was he smitten, he didn’t know much about you or what you looked like even but he wanted more of this, whatever that was, ¨Well then that means we gotta keep talking so he can hear it some more, maybe then he won’t eat your headset.¨ he could hear your giggles once more, they were creating a hole in his stomach, pretty sure it was eating itself out at your cuteness, he just wanted to continue hearing them, people never laughs at his comments, this was a first you actually thought he was funny, ¨We should. Do you think if we just don’t close the game it would stay like this? I mean like the audio and all…? Maybe we could talk some more tomorrow.¨ were you asking him on a date? That was a date, definitely. ¨Yeah I can do that, anything for sausage’s sake.¨ you were both grinning at the screen like idiots, not wanting to leave, ¨Then, since it’s the weekend how about we come back in the morning? Oh wait no, here in Miyagi the holidays are important, I gotta go to the shrine early, but how about after lunch?¨ he was so tired that even getting up by lunch time seemed like a task, but he would gladly lose sleep for this, ¨Yup, can do. See you tomorrow, sausage girl.¨ both of you left the pc on and went to bed, the smile on both of your faces causing your cheeks to hurt. 

He was cute, you’ve never had so much fun talking with a guy before, it all felt so natural like if you were talking with your best friend, like if you’ve known him since forever. You wondered if asking for his number would be too bold, he was funny and you just wanted to talk to him some more, maybe even meet him one day. Just thinking about it was making you feel giddy, your legs kicking on your bed as you squealed against your pillow, trying your best to quiet down your excitement and not wake your mother up.

Suna was on his bed thinking the very same thing, would it be weird to ask for your number? You were complete strangers, but that’s how people make friends, right? Not weird at all. He rarely had intentions of talking with any girl but talking to you tonight has been the highlight of his year and he wasn’t exaggerating. He didn’t even know he could laugh this much, Suna just couldn’t wait anymore, he was sure he wanted this to continue and with new resolution, he went to sleep, hoping noon would come fast, so he could ask for your number and maybe, hopefully, get to see you even if it was just through his phone, he just needed to put a face to this bubbly feeling inside his chest.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☾ . :☆ﾟ.･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.･

When he woke up the following morning he noticed his pc was off, this causing him to go into panic mode, what happened? He made sure it would stay on all night-

¨MOOOOM, why is my pc off? Did you touch it?¨ he was pissed, anything but that, not the pc. ¨What? No I didn’t. I think we lost power for a bit earlier, your dad was trying to fix the oven and was messing with the power box.¨ that explains it but it wasn’t less aggravating, would he even be able to go in the game again or would he be kicked out like his mates.

He turned it back on as fast as he could, going in the game, but luck wasn’t on his side, two of his classmates were already in leveling up on his screen. He grabbed his headset and literally screamed on the mic, ¨(Y/N), please tell me you are there.¨ but he could hear very manly snorts on the other side, crushing his heart ¨Who’s (Y/N)? Your girlfriend, Suna?¨ he just couldn’t deal with them right now. He rebooted his pc in hopes of getting the line back up to yours, but when he did, he saw a notification pop up on his screen, ¨We apologize for all the troubles caused last night, as an apology, we’ve sent 100 diamonds and 2 HP refills into your inbox.¨ 

No, this couldn’t be happening. They fixed it overnight. He hadn’t ask you for your number yet, that’s what he was going to do as soon as he heard your beautiful voice.

You were fixing your make up, silly thing to do since he couldn’t even see you, but it was definitely a date. You got your headset on with a bright smile on your face as you saw your screen moving, the game still playing on the background, ¨Morning, Mr. Sausage. Got a nice sleep?¨ your friends were beyond shocked, ¨Mr.Sausage? (Y/N) are you talking to your cat again? I think you need to go out some more.¨ Miyuki? No, no, no, no, why??? Where was he? What happened? You didn’t turn the game off, he should still be there! ¨Yeah…did they fix the game? I can hear you guys just fine now.¨ you were seriously hoping he was just late and would jump in the conversation any second now, ¨Mhm, they gave us some dias, check your inbox. You can buy the sword you wanted with that!¨ Stupid sword, you didn’t want it anymore, not if that meant not being able to talk to him again. ¨Sorry guys, I…I’m login out for the day.¨ without another word you just closed your laptop and collapsed face first onto your bed, life sucked.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☾ . :☆ﾟ.･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ.･

Tuesday couldn’t come faster for Suna, he just ran over to the class next door almost clashing with the wall, ¨ATSUMU! I need your help.¨ the eldest twin glared at him with intensity, couldn’t he see what time was it? Why would someone ask for a favor so early in the morning ? He was barely awake after getting up at four to jog. ¨Tell me later, maybe during lunch break when I can actually listen to you.¨

He threw his bag on the floor and went over to the tired setter, shaking him lightly, ¨Please, only you can help me.¨ what could be this important? He looked over at the middle blocker giving him a dirty angry look, but he was sporting a not so fashionable pair of bags under his eyes, even his skin tone was a bit off, was he not supposed to rest for three days? This made him reconsider his actions, ¨What is it? Stop shaking me, dammit!¨ he sat down on the chair in front of his desk, serious mode on, ¨You have the phone number of the Karasuno setter right?¨ huh? this was definitely not worth the while, he went back to sleep on his desk, ¨Atsumu please! I need you to ask him something, please I’ll beg if you want me to.¨ he’s never seen him this desperate, ¨kay, I think I do, yeah he should be on the group chat. What do you need from him?¨ he was pulling out his phone, ready to rely the message and hopefully go back to sleep, ¨Can you ask him if he knows a girl named (Y/N)¨ a girl? This was unexpectedly interesting. ¨(Y/N) what? Is she from Karasuno?¨ he was punching the message out, waiting on the details, ¨Well I don’t know, all I know is her first name and that she lives in Miyagi, she goes to school there and is possibly around our age.¨ Atsumu couldn’t believe what he was hearing, talk about dumb teammates, ¨You do know Miyagi is a prefecture, right? Not a city. How many schools are there even in Miyagi? Why would Tobio-kun know her? You are being stupid, Suna.¨ he was deleting the message, shaking his head, ¨No, no, please just ask him. I know he probably won’t know her but is my only chance, please. I won’t bother you again if he says he doesn’t know…¨ the setter sighed, sending the ambiguous message out, this was really silly, but he could see how desperate his friend was, and he just wouldn’t let him sleep ever if he didn’t comply. 

To their surprise, Kageyama replied almost immediately, ¨I don’t, but I’ll ask around.¨ Atsumu showed him his screen and the small smile that painted his features left the setter breathless, so he can smile-

¨Thanks, please let me know if he says anything else.¨ he would find you, no matter what.

○●○●○●○●●○●○●○●○●●○●○●○●○●

Tagged babes: @dazaisfavgf

Masterlist Next Chapter

#haikyuu!! #haikyu fanfiction #haikyu x reader #haikyu imagines #suna rintarou #suna x you #suna rintaro fic #sunarin #suna fluff #high school drama #inarizaki #haikyuu x f!reader #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x female reader #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu x reader #miniseries #fluff #haikyu fluff #hq x you #hq #hq imagines

[streaminn]

Yknow I've been watching the movie she's the man and I'm thinking

Obviously an au, but here's my thoughts

It's about to be the start of the school's first semester and Enid has an older brother who has a passion for singing

He has the chance to go on a tour with his friends but he can't just leave his school like that

So he has the brilliant idea to ask Enid to step in for him. Literally. Like full on crossdress.

Enid, who attends a special school for special werewolves (plot hole and an online school) has finished her course work for the next two months and is currently just crotcheting shit in boredom. She hasn't gotten much reasons to be out the house because well, her condition is low key kinda volatile

She can't shift, but intense emotions makes her pop a wolf attribute or two

The fam are generally better here, while they think wolfing out would fix Enid's condition, theyre more concerned and focus on coddling her

Enid, who knows their ways of dressing is absolutely different and that she'll get caught immedietely: are you serious??

Brother: I'll buy you first seat tickets to that one Taylor swift concert that's arriving around the time I get back

Enid with nothing else to do and alot of free time: SOLD and make it two

Brother: wha- fine!

Enid: you're also going to explain it to mom and dad

Brother: NO-

Esther and Murray aren't pleased but they're generally more concerned over Enid.

It took a bit, alot of convincing because this would be the longest Enid would be out the house but they agreed. The reason that it'd be good for Enid to socialize and talk to people her age convincing them that a new environment might help her wolf out

Anyways, for this au we gonna end up messing up Enid's design :(

her brothers hair looks alot more dirty blond so if I ever draw this, it'd look like that. And actually draw short hair Enid! Woo

Also I wasn't wrong abt the wolf features so she usually has some sort of side burns bc she's just genuinely really happy to be out the house and being about

She also probably rooms with Ajax, much to her horror bc fuck she's rooming with a guy!? But then she remembers that she roomed with her brothers, it's not that different

Enjax bromance happens, he's usually to high to notice and they're vibing

Then Enid has to partner up with the ever so infamous wednesday Addams for biology

Wednesday here is rather known in nevermore as the silent ice queen. Studious, cold and uncaring. She's there to get her things done and gtfo, no friends needed

But then her attention gets caught at the rather squeamish werewolf of a partner. Most men who talk to her usually had two types, business or annoying. The annoying were the ones that try to court her, acting all tough and that they can handle her. I can fix her! Is a phrase that gets tossed around. It all crumbles the moment they realize that threats she make, the lines she is willing to cross and the things she keep in her room weren't simply lies.

Yoko can barely handle it and she drank blood. It's not surprising but it is disappointing.

It disgusts her, that false brovado. All fake and lies. The promises they can't even keep. How can they even be a partner, let alone a good husband if there was no faith?

Atleast she can deal with business, those were the ones she can tolerate the most. They were there to do their work and only bother her when necessary.

Enid Sinclair (we gotta work on a boy name or smth) was.. Interesting. He would be situated in business, if he didn't seem to always be right where she was most of the time.

In the library (Enid's eyes got overstimulated walking outside so she took a break

Or she does extra online school work there bc it's a good area to focus in, Wednesday Def wonders why tf she taking advanced insert subject name)

The greenhouse (the smell is reminiscent of her room back home, she takes care of alot of plants and she hopes that her mother is taking care of them)

Outside in the dark (enid has all this freedom so you bet she's doing all sorts of kinda reckless things. Like staying up late, running around the campus at night and maybe buying some food from Jericho at like 3 am)

Fencing of all places (reason explained later on the post but Wednesday is wondering how such a stick thin boy is handling himself OK)

But what frustrates her the most is how unapologetically a pussy he is. Like this boy isn't afraid to scrunch his noise and lean far away from the carcass they have to dissect. Then he inches closer and tries it with an obviously green ass face bc he needs to do it for the grade.

Not to impress her but for school

The courage is admirable

And well, can you blame her for wondering what's up with the guy that always says hi whenever they pass by each other after their first class together? Not alot of people are willing to interact with her other than the usual brisk acknowledgement between her and yoko

There's Bianca but they're rivals so it doesn't count

Enid? He'd be walking with his pack of stoners and still say hi if he passes by. Gives a thumbs up if he ever sees her looking and mentions that he saw this flower and that it reminded him of her

It was weird

It was.. Nice

(oh no)

Enid on her side is hyped as FUCK. she's finally out of the house so she has freedom to do some reckless shit

So you bet she signs up for the fencing club bc rough housing? Her parents didn't let her do that!

Gets her ass beat by yoko

Asks for a rematch

Still gets her ass beat

It's only when she's lowkey bruised and her body is sore does Yoko come over and ask if she's good

Enid laughs and accepts the hand given. "never been better!" bc that burn in her muscles? Addicting and so friendship is born

Bianca and Wednesday watching from the side

Bianca: did ur roomie awaken something in him?? Bc this is just masochistic

Wednesday, admiring how sisyphus-esque the whole situation was: no he's always been weird

Anyways that's it, there's definitely a moment where yoko is going into the bathroom and Enid nearly follows her in out of habit

Enid definitely is alot touchier here as well. Always gotta have an arm around someone's shoulder and a hand on someone's back.

Wenclair happens eventually!

#Au thoughts #Enid sinclair #Wenclair #Wednesday addams #She's the man au

[joesmemes]

THINGS SAID IN THE GROUP CHAT SENTENCE STARTERS

Assembled by @sheenathehyena.

I gave you a beach house now be normal

It's just so fucking ridiculous it circles back around to being poignant

I'm fine but what an inconsiderate toolbox

the fucking white boi who is trying to "find himself" that you meet all of once at the beginning

Yeah you want me to shoot my baby batter all over you cover you with almost - children

YOUR PLANET'S HOPE IS SONIC THE HEDGEHOG'S TRANS ASSHOLE

Not sure how to feel about talking to actual fucking yakuza members for entertainment purposes

On a scale of Balan Wonderworld to Silent Hill, how are you dealing with your trauma?

Roses are red, violets are blue, singular they is older than singular you

Concerned Ape noises

You ever think about the fact that [name] really said "the birds work for the bourgeoisie" & they were right

My patience for slipping over improperly spilled blood has run out.

If you can see the bones of your whipped pupil, you failed.

You know the healer's oath: Only do moderate harm to those who cross you.

Man I don't know if lack of shame is a blessing or a curse.

Parsooth m'lady but would you be so kind as to partake of the exquisite past time of role playing?

So they aren't DENYING the piss kink

uhm you need to be more of a doormat…..your boundaries are making me uncomfy 😦

That's HARLEQUIN NOVEL descriptors of sex

where is my mouse arrow? where is it holy fuck

fetishize urself ig

It's always people with feet fetishes or fat fetishes that be so open about it

Look at this unhinged mother fucker

Fuck you I hope your pice of shit family burn in a dumpster fire

Sorry you had to overshare about a tough time with some random chick in school but it's not relavent to my cat at all.

We're at a sword store and it's full of exactly what you'd expect.

Nobody was reading Lemony Snicket going "teehee they made Count Olaf bitch sauce"

Wikipedia I love you but your donation pleas sound like a lying teenager begging for money online

There's no right way to look at the guy that tossed his baby off a cliff and say "I think he needs to look cool for a minute there" is all I'm saying

Okay, wonderful. GREAT, take them all. Please leave immediately

one time I ran a server and I was being weird so I changed literally everyone's nickname to Frank

AKGHDLK I'm gonna SOB they asked if they could share their ticklefics

heavy meals always make me HONK MIMIMIMIMI

I found a fucking book of Mormon lmafo

lemme go take a dump and ill set it up

THREE. THREE TIMES. HE'S BEEN ARRESTED FOR INSIDER TRADEING THREE FUCKING TIMES.

tell her it was you who farted, establish dominance

I have been hoarding vidya games for the three of us to play like a dragon

Nearly had a heart attack because I was poopin and saw blood but realized it was my period

Ok we need to get a big cardboard box and a vaguely feminine scarecrow dressed as a boyfriendless girl

Puts my head in your lap like a cat

Some Filipinos wanna buy your titty mousepads

the chris chan trials are about to be the depp vs heard trial for people who had unrestricted internet access at a young age

Now u will screenshot us talking shit and put it in the callout 😭

GUYS I NEED PROOF THAT [name] IS GAY TO STICK IT TO A 19 YEAR OLD ALT RIGHT IDIOT

🙂 our fursona is gonna b friends with sonic

I both love and hate [name]’s writing. How they go from ancient purple prose to “oh shit oh fuck”

i guess you could say…. this was a triumph

#rp meme #sentence starters #inbox meme #roleplay memes #resources #rp meme blog #starter set #starters

[otakusheep15]

Human World AU (part 2)

The long-awaited update to this post that I meant to write forever ago but never got around to. This one will focus more on the relationships between the characters, how they met, what their living situations are like, etc. 

Warnings: mentions of death during childbirth, several mentions of child abuse/neglect, implied/referenced underage sex, mention of binge eating disorder, mentions physical and verbal violence

The Brothers

The seven of them had a very tough life, especially in their childhood.

Everything started going wrong when their mom died while giving birth to triplets. Beel and Belphie were both fine, but Lilith gave her major complications. She died, and so did Lilith. 

Lucifer remembers the most vividly, since he was 12 at the time. Mammon and Leviathan remember bits and pieces, but they were a bit too young to remember all of the details. 

After the death of his wife, their father became very abusive towards them. Lucifer and Mammon took the brunt of it because they wanted to protect their brothers, but they couldn’t save them every time. 

Beel and Belphie had it especially bad because their father blamed them for what happened. 

This went on for six years until Lucifer turned 18. The second he was of legal age, he moved out and took his brothers with him. After a couple years of fighting, Lucifer was able to get full custody over her brothers and even adopted them. To this day, he has major oldest sibling syndrome, and he still can’t get over it. 

Mammon began acting out a lot when he became a teenager. He would constantly get bad grades in school, get into fights, and even ran away a few times. Lucifer struggled to deal with him, but he knew deep down that Mammon was just struggling like the rest of them. 

Leviathan developed major agoraphobia, resulting in him having to be homeschooled for both middle school and high school. Eventually, his brothers were able to convince him to go to college in person after Lucifer promised he could stay at home instead of living in the dorms. He still has yet to fully get over his agoraphobia, and there are some days where he has to revert back to online classes, but he’s trying his best and his brothers are very proud of him. 

Satan was seemingly the calmest of the brothers, but he developed horrible anger issues. If Lucifer thought Mammon’s fights were bad, he was not at all prepared for what Satan would do. He also had a major superiority complex, and he would often get into (verbal) fights with teachers when he thought they were wrong. Satan has been suspended many times, and yet he was also able to remain at the top of his class every year since kindergarten. 

Asmodeus fell in with the wrong crowds as a teenager. He always felt left out or ignored by his brothers, especially Lucifer, so he became friends with people who definitely did not have his best interests in mind. He lost his virginity at an early age, around 14 or so, and became very hypersexual. It was a nightmare for him, and he regrets everything he ever did as a teenager. He’s gotten better over the years, but he can never fully escape his past, and sometimes he falls back into old habits. 

Beelzebub developed a binge eating order at a very young age. He always overate and was pretty unhealthy as a kid. To try and make up for it, he got into sports and athletics, but it didn’t help that much. He was able to develop muscles, but his disorder never went away, and he was constantly falling ill due to how much he ate. After several doctors visits, he’s started the healing process, but he still can’t be trusted to fix his own meals, so Belphie is usually the one to fix him meals. 

Belphegor suffers from narcolepsy and depression. All of the brothers have depression, but his is the most severe, and his narcolepsy does not help. Beel is almost always around him just in case he suddenly falls asleep, and they’ve shared classes together since they started school. Belphie is another one who constantly fights with his teachers, but he’s better at keeping quiet most of the time. He and Satan cause Lucifer a lot of trouble, but he loves them regardless. 

Now, they’re all grown up and doing a lot better. They are all in therapy, both for the family trauma and their own personal struggles, and it helps. As of now, Lucifer lives with Diavolo and Barbatos, Mammon and Leviathan live in an apartment complex near Lucifer’s home (but they do not live together for obvious reasons). Satan, Asmo, and Solomon live together. Satan has his own room while Asmo and Solomon share. Beel and Belphie live in the college dorms, and they are roomates. 

Lucifer and Simeon

The two of them met in high school and quickly became good friends. They were on student council together. Simeon was president and Lucifer was his vice, and they were a great duo. Everyone in their school loved them and their dedication to the school. 

When they graduated, they both knew they wanted to be lawyers, so they applied to the same school. They took many courses together, but Simeon was a philosophy major while Lucifer majored in psychology. After graduation, they began working at the same law firm, and they mainly focus on child abuse cases. These types of cases are very important to Lucifer, and Simeon wanted to support his best friend. 

They partner up on many cases, and one of their cases actually introduced them to Luke, who Simeon later adopted. Together, Lucifer and Simeon have saved many children, and both of them are very successful in their field of work. 

While they do not live together, Lucifer often finds himself at Simeon’s place. Activities range from working on cases to simply having tea and chatting. Sometimes, Lucifer will bring Diavolo and Barbatos, and all four of them will hang out. On rare occasions, even Luke will come out and interact with them when he is not feeling shy. 

Simeon is very close with Lucifer’s brothers, especially Leviathan and Satan. They’ll often hang out and discuss their favorite writers/novels. Lucifer is just glad his brothers all seem to like Simeon. 

Lucifer, Diavolo, and Barbatos

Lucifer met Diavolo and Barbatos during a work-related event. Diavolo is a close friend of Lucier’s boss, so it was natural they would meet at some point. The three hit it off right away, and it was practically love at first sight for Diavolo. 

At the time, Diavolo and Barbatos were already together, but Barbatos already knew Diavolo was poly and did not mind him pursuing Lucifer as another partner. 

For a long time, Lucifer declined his advances. He was a very busy man between his job and caring for his brothers, so he had no time for a partner. However, Diavolo was persistent, and eventually scored a date. 

The date was at Diavolo’s home, and Barbatos even made dinner for them. It was a lovely evening, and Lucifer was finally able to admit his attraction for Diavolo. 

It took awhile for the three to work out the relationship, but it got there. Lucifer and Barbatos were more than fine with sharing Diavolo, and they worked together to create a schedule for dates and the like. Diavolo is just happy to be included. 

Naturally, Diavolo loves spoiling his partners, and he has the money to do so. Barbatos is already used to it since they’ve known each other for so long, but it took Lucifer some getting used to considering he was never exactly rich growing up. However, he does get used to it eventually, and will often ask Diavolo to buy things for his brothers instead. 

Lucifer only moved in with Diavolo and Barbatos once Belphie and Beel went off to college. He was afraid to move in any earlier since he didn’t want to leave any of them behind. 

All of his brothers love Diavolo, but it’s mostly because he’s rich. Diavolo does not care and is just happy Lucifer’s brothers like him. Barbatos is also well-liked, especially by Beel and Belphie. 

Barbatos has also become close with Simeon because of their get-togethers, and Luke has gotten very attached to him. At this point, Barbatos is as much of a father to Luke as Simeon is, and Simeon is very happy Luke has found another person to look up to. 

Satan, Solomon, and Asmodeus

Satan and Solomon were in the same year in high school. At first, they did not get along at all, and they had a constant rivalry going on. In fact, they never quite got over that rivalry, and still (half-jokingly) fight from time to time. 

Around their junior year, they actually became very close friends and started hanging out all the time. Once, Satan brought Solomon over to work on a project, and that’s when he met Asmodeus. The two of them fell in love at first sight, and Satan had never regretted having friends more than in this moment. Of course the one time he tries to have a friend over his brother just swoops in and romances said friend. Don’t worry, he gets over it eventually and actually becomes their number one supporter. 

Solomon and Satan moved in together once they started college, but Solomon dropped out after a couple years. He went on to get a part-time job at a cafe while Satan continued school full-time. 

By this time, Solomon and Asmo had already started dating, so it surprised no one when he moved in with the two when he graduated high school. Everyone thought Satan would get annoyed with them immediately, but they’re respectful of boundaries and rarely cause a disturbance. 

As of now, Solomon still has his part-time coffee shop job, but he’s lowkey embarrassed about it and is looking into better jobs. Satan works at a local library full time and occasionally does pet-sitting for some extra cash. Asmo is still in school and plans on becoming a fashion designer when he graduates. 

Simeon and Luke

As stated earlier, the two initially met because Luke was the victim of a case Simeon and Lucifer were working on. At the time, Luke was about eight, and he had very neglectful parents. He also had no other family who could take care of him, so he was at risk of being put into foster care. 

Simeon saw what foster care did to young children, and he couldn’t let a kid suffer like that, especially not when said kid was relying on him to protect him. 

As expected, they won their case, and Luke’s parents lost custody of him. However, Simeon was not done with this case yet. He wanted to be the one to take care of Luke. The adoption process was long and difficult, but Simeon never gave up hope, and soon the day arrived when he could officially adopt Luke and become his dad. 

It was a huge deal, and everyone was very excited for him. Lucifer and his brothers all showed up to watch the adoption be officiated, and they had a small party afterwards. 

The first couple months were a bit shaky. Luke had already gotten used to Simeon’s home, but it was still a bit awkward to get used to living there full time. They took it slow, and Luke gradually relaxed more. 

At school, Luke is a very shy kid, and he has no friends. Simeon knows it’s because of his trauma, and he's trying his best to help Luke open up more and make friends. Surprisingly, Luke does like some of Simeon’s friends, specifically Barbatos. Barbatos comes over often to teach Luke how to bake, and they get along much better than anyone could have guessed. Luke is also fond of Beel, and often bakes him little treats. 

Everyone adores Luke and does their absolute best to accommodate him whenever he’s around. Simeon is very glad to have their support, and he’s happy Luke has begun to branch out more and interact with others. 

#obey me #shall we date obey me #obey me au #human au #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me simeon #obey me solomon #obey me luke #au

[sapphirefallschronicles]

- ̥۪͙۪˚┊❛ Welcome to Sapphire Falls - chapter 15 ❜┊˚̥۪͙۪◌  

Basketballer!Chris Evans x Abigail Syverson (plus size!ofc) & Farmer!Syverson x Livia Darmandi (Asian ofc)

Summary: Abigail has locked herself in her room and Sy has no idea how to deal with last night's debacle.

Word count: 1.3k

Warnings: Mention of murder and prison, but nothing severe.

A/N: Today it's @keanureevesisbae her birthday (the big 24), so don't be shy and congratulate her 🥰🤗

The Advent Calendar (a.k.a. the masterlist)

So, last night started out great. I knew Livia would look gorgeous, because we bought the dress together, but when I was waiting for her in the lobby of the hotel and I saw her, I was flabbergasted in the good sense. That green dress looked stunning on her, it hugged her frame in all the right places. Paired with the heels and her long locks and a little bit more make-up than she usually wore. 

It did remind me of prom night.

When I placed my hand on her lower back, to give her that physical nudge to actually walk inside, I realized why she was so dead set on having me along her side, minus the fact she had to turn her lie into reality, because of what she said to Chris.

Livia Darmandi isn’t great with large crowds. Nervous ticks I thought she retired in high school came back full force. She chewed on her bottom lip, it appeared like she was holding her breath continuously and even when I saw her coming back from the bathroom, she patted herself on the head, a nervous tick she did all the way through high school, almost like she was consoling herself.

My poor Liv. 

And that meant I had to be there for her. Which I did. When she was talking to people, she introduced me as her best friend and when I sensed she got slightly nervous, I’d place my hand on her back and she physically relaxed.

Last night was supposed to be great, but then it made a full 180.

And now I’m just furious. 

Fucking Chris. I don’t think I ever saw that much hurt in my sister’s eyes. She’s a tough one, but this absolutely broke her. It’s that I don’t hit ladies, but that woman was really close on getting a smack on the head from me. 

No one hurts my sister. 

All morning I’ve spent chopping wood, carrying the logs to the barn and taking care of the animals. All to distract myself from the fact I want to strangle Chris. I was tempted to look up how long you have to spend time in prison for murder, but I didn’t. 

I drop the logs on the ground when I feel my phone vibrate in my back pocket. ‘Hi,’ I say when I pick up and place the phone on the windowsill of the barn.

I stare at Livia’s beautiful face on my screen, as she apparently has decided to FaceTime me, instead of calling. She looks casual, with her hair up in a bun and from the looks of it, she’s still in her pajamas. She looked absolutely gorgeous last night, but even dressed down, Livia Darmandi still looks ethereal.

‘How is Abigail?’

‘She locked herself in her room.’

Livia grumbles. ‘Well, I stalked that bitch Bethany online and boy… If you wanna talk about big city girls, I think she puts all of them to shame. She’s a big city girl with daddy’s credit card. The worst kind.’

I nod. ‘Figured that much.’

‘So, Abigail hasn’t shown herself at all?’

I shake my head. ‘Nope.’

‘You know, you should bring her some wine.’

‘What? Wine? Liv, it’s twelve in the afternoon,’ I say, rolling up my sleeves.

‘Yeah so?’ Livia asks. ‘Bring her some wine. Caleb Syverson, I implore you to get your sister a nice glass. It has been a tragic night, she deserves some alcohol. Also, when you do give her that wine, tell her detective Livia Darmandi is looking into all of Bethany’s weak spots and we’ll get her back.’

I can’t help but smile, because of the way Livia is trying to make me feel better and hoping therefore she makes Abigail feel better. ‘I will do that.’

‘On another note, I really had fun last night. You really do radiate calmness. Sorry for being a nervous wreck.’

‘You were a nervous wreck,’ I say, ‘but it was fine. You’re pretty cute when you’re nervous.’

She smiles and says: ‘And you are absolutely thirst trapping with that lumberjack blouse and the rolled up sleeves. I think it’s a good thing that the shed is far away from civilization, because no one would survive that.’

I push aside the shed and the memories attached to it, however parts of it still slip. She looked gorgeous that night, but she always was gorgeous. It didn’t matter whether or not she was in that red prom dress, or in her worn down pajamas. Her smile, her body, her trust in me.

Over the course of the years, I hadn’t been living like a monk. The times I left Sapphire Falls, I had emerged myself in some bar visits, pool games and what not, where I met different women. But I couldn’t attach myself to them. It never felt good, it never felt familiar.

It never felt like it did with Livia. 

‘Stop that,’ I say.

‘Never,’ she retorts. ‘Anyways, I’m going back to my writing and my digging on a certain ex-fiancée and you are going to…?’

‘Bring my sister some wine.’

‘Oh, Sy, where did you get that marvelous idea from?’

I shrug. ‘Don’t know. Think some annoying lady nagged about it.’

‘I will kill you next time I see you,’ she tells me, glaring at me. ‘Alright, see you later. Bye.’ She blows me a joking kiss, before she hangs up. 

●・○・●・○・●

Knowing better than to dismiss Livia’s ideas, I do what she commanded me to and I have poured in a glass of wine. I am not the sophisticated kind, so I googled how much wine to pour in. There is a chance I still messed up, but wine is wine and it will taste good no matter what, I suppose.

I knock on the door and hear a: ‘Go away.’

I know better than to listen to that. ‘I’ve got something for you,’ I say.

‘Go away.’ This time, she sounds even more pissed than before.

‘Livia told me I should bring you wine,’ I continue, a door still dividing us. ‘Want me to place it down on the ground here or hand it to you?’

It stays silent and I think she’s contemplating whether or not she is gonna allow me in. ‘Come in.’

I open the door, only to see Abigail curled up in her bed, not sparing me a look. 

‘Don’t ask,’ she says. ‘Just hand me the glass and give me a refill in approximately half an hour.’

Knowing she doesn’t want to talk more about it, I simply hand her the glass and walk back out. I close the door and let out a deep sigh, before I continue on my business of carrying around the logs. To keep myself distracted is the best way for me to go. 

I know that there has always been this lingering feeling between Chris and my sister, but I felt like I wasn’t the right person to tell them to get their shit together, when I couldn’t even tell Livia how much I adored her. 

But there is this thing between Chris and Abigail and that is they hurt each other unintentionally. 

I move onto chopping wood, when I hear someone approach. I turn around and see Chris walking up to me.

That son of a bitch.

‘She doesn’t wanna talk to you,’ I tell him. ‘And neither do I, so just go.’

He doesn’t just go. Instead Chris has the audacity to open his mouth and says: ‘Sy, just listen to—’

‘I’m holding an ax and I’m pissed at you. Know that I don’t care if I go to prison for murder.’ To further prove my point, I use my ax to chop the log in two. Chris swallows hard. Despite him having some extra height, even back in high school, it was clear I was the strongest and with just one look, I can confirm that’s still the case. ‘Now get off my damn property.’

For a second he hesitates, but then Chris nods. ‘Just tell her I’m sorry, okay?’ And with that, he saunters off.

Like I’m gonna tell her that.

#Welcome to Sapphire Falls #Welcome to Sapphire Falls Masterlist #diegos-butt & keanureevesisbae advent calender #Chris Evans #Henry Cavill #Syverson #Basketballer!Chris Evans #Farmer!Syverson #Plus size!ofc #Asian!ofc #chris evans x plus size ofc #henry cavill x asian ofc #chris evans x ofc #henry cavill x ofc

[apompkwrites]

I LOVEEE the Traveling!Vanrouge Idea!! So I'm going to expand on it :D !! Wholesome - Vanrouge!Name who's been everywhere in the world and met more people then you can count. They've made their way into the history books much like their brother. The only difference is they go under many names. They see the history books much like a photo album! Vanrouge!Name who's adopted their own little family within time. The Black Sheep! While they don't come to the school or are seen by others. Vanrouge!Name provides to them much like a guardian angel, whisking them away peter pan style away from their troubles Vanrouge!Name getting into the stupidest unthinkable scenarios, and ready to tell them to the Black Sheep children who don't believe a single (truthful!) word they say. Vanrouge!Name who can actually cook, but is bad at handling children Vanrouge!Name who's been playing online with their brother (and Idia) this entire time trolling him Vanrouge!Name who knows how powerful they are, and use it to troll random people on their journeys in random villages or cities, and making friends along the way! Angst - Vanrouge!Name who appears to Lilia in many different forms to check on their brother, despite not being able to truly connect again Vanrouge!Name who Lilia has mourned for thousands of years. He saw their body lying in his arms, and when their body disappears from his grasp, he realizes the best things in life leave at some point. His lessons about time to Malleus have this as an origin. Lilia telling Malleus, Silver, and Sebek about tales of two travelling siblings who fought off enemies, two siblings against the world until one settled on a tree behind, while one carried on. Lilia mourning Vanrouge!Name for years and years, clinging onto anything they left behind. He looked for them for decades until giving up. Friendships - Vanrouge!Name who Lil King has MAJOR tsundere tough love with. Little King will never admit that Vanrouge!name is their parental figure, no way Vanrouge!Name who Young Draconia LOVES, Young Draconia is similar to Malleus in the way that they're overprotective over their parental figure! Vanrouge!Name who Rebel Rosehearts adores, Vanrouge!Name is so cool in their eyes! Vanrouge!Name who met Older!Volt during one of their travels, they two are part time travelling partners! Its literally the Drama Queen x Angry Mature, trope - Aster Anon

traveling!vanrouge is that like trope of a time traveler just going around doing whatever because they're bored. like they've long realized that they'll be alive for a while so they'll do whatever they want.

imagine traveling!vanrouge just collecting all of the history books! and then one of the black sheep are doing something for class, specifically history, and traveling!vanrouge just goes "oh, i can help! i was there when it happened!"

oogh and for angst imagine traveling!vanrouge actually did want to come home but saw the lilia was teaching lil malleus that time will continue to move and all they can do is move on from loss. so they just think that if they come back, it would ruin all of what lilia worked so hard to deal with :(

the vanrouge siblings give the same vibe as aether and lumine ngl...

#a pompk answers #black sheep #an aster anon's rambles

[lovebirdgames]

How much dating experience do the ROs have before Cadence?

Tom: He had that one online girlfriend and he never saw a picture of her so who even knows what kind of person he was buying League skins for.

Peter: He definitely has the most experience. He started breaking hearts as early as middle school. Is that something to be proud of though??

Clark: None. There are more important things to deal with!

Samuel: I can picture him having had one serious long-term girlfriend so far.

Poptart: None. He doesn't get out enough. Maybe he had a girl who was crushing on him in the foster home.

Doug: He's had multiple short-term relationships and many one-and-done dates that he probably didn't even realize were dates.

Garth: Not much, his standards are narrow and it's been tough finding a good match, though he's looking to fix that.

#ask bcb

[silyabeeodess]

What headcannons do you have on Derrick Arden? I saw your post while back. What would've happened in an AU, everything is the same, except Derrick lives? What would he do after graduation? Both as a job and in private?

Been a long time since I've talked about anything Kuroshitsuji related! Sadly, with the amount of pull Derrick has at school, I just don't see him changing if he survived. More than likely, he'll follow a victim mentality where he'd think he's completely innocent and would ignore all the abuse he himself has done to other students leading up to Greenhill attacking him and the vice headmaster. The reason Derrick was able to get away with everything he has throughout his life is because he's never had to face any true consequences for his actions up until that point. His only consequences prior were responsibilities he did not earn and then just passed on to other people. Moreover, however strict his family his, they've apparently never caught Derrick in his lies, so not even his parents will punish him properly. They'll more than likely just back Derrick as "their poor son attacked by four prefects gone mad."

The thing is though, despite what all of these students, and people like them in the real world, think... School isn't everything. It's a closed environment that means absolutely nothing except what you take with you once you step out of it. I once had bully who ruled over my first elementary school because her mom was a teacher. Everyone followed her like a bunch of mindless sheep, but the instant we got to high school, those connections broke. At this same school, I had a lunch monitor that was so vile she wouldn't let anyone, not even a student with Down Syndrome, get up from their table to get a fork if they forgot it: We were basically told to eat with our hands or starve. She was eventually fired, not for those actions, but (according to rumor anyway) because she refused to help a student who needed to use a urinary catheter (which she legally could not do). She had to work at a gas station after that, along with receiving some other karma that is so dark a fate that I don't feel comfortable sharing it online. In a school's hierarchy, people like those two women, or Derrick and the vice headmaster, get on a power trip, but the instant they step away from that environment... they're nobody.

What would Derrick take with him when he'd graduate? Knowledge? He never put any effort into his studies. Connections? He's got his small circle of nobles, but the prefects and Derrick's victims are a much bigger one--not to mention they're a part of other powerful families like the Druitts that could both figuratively and literally bury him without anyone batting an eye. The prefects would more than likely end up expelled after the event, but all that free time would just give them plenty of opportunities to build up a grudge and cook up revenge. And when things get tough, chances are, those so-called friends of Derrick's that are just as morally bankrupt and follow him around for money are going to kick him to the side.

Derrick's a noble and the family heir at that, so it's unlikely he'd go for a traditional job. More than likely, as soon as he got out of Weston, his family would start pushing him into more adult social circles and prepare him to take over as the next Marques. Here though is where the true consequences of his actions would take over. Because with the prefects expelled, they'll have likely already been in those same circles. Even if his social standing wasn't destroyed, barring him and potentially his family as a whole from things like business deals or marriages... Derrick would by no means be fit to run his family's household. He'd either drag his entire family to ruin; end up revealing his lies to his parents, who'd then strip him of his status as the heir; or both. Even if his family still keeps him afloat with their wealth, if he doesn't know how to manage it, he'll still end up destitute or dead.

Could he grow after that? Maybe. People can change. However, given how many people he's hurt and the severity of his actions, it's not easy to say that others would be willing to give him a second chance.

#derrick arden #kuroshitsuji #black butler #manga #anime #weston college arc #ask #alsbishop #au #headcanons

[allbeendonebefore]

“For all of that, the notion that Alberta’s politics stifles all dissent, or made queer life impossible was not historically accurate. This research illustrates how the largely middle-class activists and organizers strove to make it safe... to be queer in Edmonton. And it makes plain how much further they had to go than their peers in Saskatchewan and Manitoba.” “It is suggestive of the challenges of being queer in Edmonton that so much energy and resources went into counselling individuals struggling with their sexual orientation and negotiating the commensurate identities issues.”

this is very hard hitting to me because waking up today in this reality was an ordeal. but it makes me think a lot.

i don’t want to glamourize or valourize the difficulty of being queer in the “tough” city too much because i don’t want to fall into the trap of queer life in edmonton = suffering only but. at the same time it makes me reflect a lot on how i’ve perceived and chosen to personify and characterize my city (is it mine yet? has it always been?) in art over the years and so rambles about that follow

i designed Ed in sub-rural high school a few years after returning to Canada from post 9/11 midwestern America when i was filled with this dissatisfaction of being "home” only to discover that my life was matching next to none of the imagined past i had growing up in Edmonton, and trying to reconcile the gap between this mythical multicultural utopia in the Big City just out of my reach that existed only in my memory and this growing awareness of the rest of Canada looking down on us as a province and as a city- as I discovered firsthand in a rural k-9 school (which even this past year was subject to a horrific hate crime), this was not an entirely undeserved reputation.

of course during this time i was dealing with several battles that didn’t occur to me until later as having any real impact on who i was: all my classmates assuming upon barely interacting with me that i was a lesbian on the grounds of not admitting to liking anyone Ever; being referred to as “that” because my gender expression was considered deviant by my peers; grappling with the sexual deviance associated with hobbies at the time that were far far far from the mainstream at this point (anime and online social networks! gasp); protesting bill 44 without a second thought as to how people would perceive me after; coming out as asexual to relative strangers in a time where there were still only 2.5 orientations and identities barely spoken aloud; and graduating (finally!) into Big City University where I was struggling to reconcile things like being a notorious atheist completely against religious fundamentalism with my Not a Sexuality TM with my Yaoi is for Perverts Which I Am Not with my Feminism is Too Political For Me and so on and so forth.

(so you can see why when i was stepping between ultra religious conservative alberta and weird lefty university life i made these characters somewhat ironically with all the yaoi tropes and demanded that they not be shipped together. lmao. what was i thinking honestly. was it a challenge for others or for me? was it the start of a dialogue or the end of one?)

and sequestered as i was in my little southside university life a certain born and raised Edmontonian from an inner city north side school background, as desperate to escape the city as i was to be repatriated to it, decided this was insufficient and thrust me into directly confronting the fears and anxieties i had picked up through osmosis of Scary Downtown Edmonton. It’s not really a coincidence that the two major changes in Ed’s design (his queerness and his Indigeneity) happened at northside transit stops, both at night, in the company of the incorrigible quatschmachen). I remember us joking about Ed as “the gay cousin” after a particular journey to a discount theatre with a distinct sketchy reputation just a hop skip and a jump from the industrial, uh, charm of the meat packing plants and Belvedere LRT station and, naturally, it stuck. The myth in my head was beginning to grasp onto the realities that I had once been disenchanted by and was desperate to cover up. And it stuck.

And it stuck and I spent a long time “justifying” it in my head, because you have to remember up until this point that personifying a place with any “difference” (in ethnicity, ability, etc) or acknowledging the real struggles of being queer in a place outside of the sacrilegiously gay-and-silly and yes subversive heta-verse... it wasn’t acceptable in fandom. It was rarely done and when it was it was often met with extremely virulent hostility, hostility in similar-but-different ways to the hostility i faced for accidentally expressing “difference” that I didn’t realize I was expressing in rural backwater Alberta.

And it stuck and suddenly it became a gateway into this secret untold history of the city.

And maybe I will write more about that as my research progresses. but there you go, a little insight into why I designed Ed the way I did and why I’ve upheld that particular characterization for all these years. And now a decade after designing him exist the citations to back up my choices, on one hand, and the resolve to keep fighting, to keep writing that history in spite of these odds that look insurmountable from the outside.

it’s tough being the tough city but the battles are worth fighting. and that’s why i do what i do.

#hapo rambles #ed notes #hapo reads canadian history #hapo reads queer history #personal hapo

[countlessrealities]

𝐅𝐈𝐅𝐓𝐄𝐄𝐍 𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐑

Are you named after anyone?

Yes and no. No one in my family has my first name, but I have a second and a third names (which aren't official, as in the are present on my birth certificate but not on my other IDs) that are dedicated to my maternal grandfather and to my maternal great-grandmother.

When was the last time you cried?

I honestly can't remember. It's been a while, though. I had an anxiety attack last month, but I didn't really cry. So maybe...uh, December last year? 0.o Or maybe before then. I know that I cry way less than it's healthy these days.

Do you have kids?

Nope and I don't have plans to ever have some. I don't think I have what it takes to be a good parent, considering that I'll be mostly focus on my work. And I'm not equipped to be a parent in any case. At most, if I ever were to adopt a kid, I'd been some sort of older sibling figure to them, but definitely not a parent.

Do you use sarcasm a lot?

Yes. It's my number one defensive mechanism when I'm directly dealing / talking to someone. In general sarcasm is my humour. I can't say that I'm a funny person, because I'm not, so sarcasm and irony tend to replace what for most people would be covered by humour.

What's the first thing you notice about people?

It depends on the person and on how I meet the person. IRL, I guess it the way they approach others (myself included), Online it's usually their speech patterns and how they related to other people. Usually, I'm always wary of new people until I've seen how they relate to other. How they talk to and about them is usually a good way for me to tell whether or not they are worth my efforts.

What's your eye colour?

Grey-blue (I didn't give my eyes to one of my muses on purpose, nope. I realise it in the aftermath like an idiot xD).

Scary movies or happy endings?

Damn, this is a tough one. Horror is one of my fave genres, but it's also to be said that I'm very picky when it comes to horror movie. They not only have to be scary, but they have to make sense and have a comprehensible lore. If it's just jumpscares and random stereotypes, thanks, but no thanks.

On the other hands I really like happy endings in fiction. Real life sucks badly enough, I want some satisfaction and proper endings at least in fictional universes. So, if I had to pick, I guess happy endings?

Any special talents?

I'm kind of not sure? I've been told that I have a knack for writing and also that I have a great emotional intelligence (which isn't the same as empathy, mind you). Personally, I don't think I'm especially talented in any field.

Where were you born?

Italy! That's my mother country and Italian is mother language ^^

What are your hobbies?

writing (mostly fanfics), roleplaying, listening to music, watching movies/shows, overthinking shit, being a walking mess in general.

Have you any pets?

I have a cat! He's white, deaf and has motor issues, but I really love him 🖤

What sport do you play/have you played?

I've always practised sport, since I was in elementary school, and I've practised a lot of them before settling for one in particular. Before the pandemics, I used to do martial arts (even if I have been skipping a lot of lessons because of university). I'm not doing much nowadays, but after graduation, I'm planning to get back on track with that too.

How tall are you?

168 cm (which should be 5'5"? Or 5'6", I can never remember)

Favourite subject in school?

Philosophy and literature.

Dream job?

I'm on my way to become a doctor and I'd say that it's my dream job. Not because I've always wanted to become one or stuff like that, but because nowadays I can't imagine myself as anything else.

Tagged by: @misstantabismuses & @misfits-of-zaun [[ thank you! ]] tagging: @advnterccs @omniishambles @imprvdente @halfghcst @dynamoprotocol @technodromes & whoever wants to steal it !

#[ ooc :: mun scotty on comm ] #[ ooc :: about the mun ] #[ ooc :: dash games ] #;; queue

[animeandfilmotaku]

Haikyuu and how it helped me to find myself and that hunger

I am going a little sappy here, as I am writing this right now, on the shockwave of finishing my last day of work, and I am so grateful for watching Haikyuu and its adventures.

So I have been working in a certain social enteprise for like a good time in my 20’s (like 5 or so) In short, it is great but however I feel basically stuck here with that comfortable utopia, until the end of last year due to personal circumstances I circled into a very bad depression which to the point, I just broke down sobbing and just simply numb mentally and emotionally. I recall during an annual accountability meeting that I simply do want to speak to anyone.

The details are fuzzy, but the weight of work is too much for me, until my family made a choice to go to Japan in the cold winter to let me have a breather. And it is where I let myself figure out what to do, of course I did my pilgrimage to Fushimi Inari shrine to try to climb to the top, because many years back- I did this on my first trip with family friends- after a trying period of dealing with a toxic boss and health issues, which I did not as my health was fragile- which I recovered from a bad cold.

And the most unexpected thing is that I want to know Haikyuu because of my dear work bestie, which I call them affectionally as Bokuaka colleague and my online friend Fawnie talking about the series which I was surrounded curiously by the many merch here, which I snapped so many pictures and share it on discord and telegram, so when I came back home, I decided ok what the heck I am going to watch it, and man it was a breath of fresh air- to see such a small underdog team conquering bigger and scarier teams to reach a simple goal which are the nationals. And along the way, they grew better over many lost matches and wins.

Of course I was team Karasuno as every Haikyuu fan, (yes Asanoya was the pairing that I adore and Asahi’s arc being so inspirational as I faced my own Iron Walls) but however it is Inarizaki high, and mostly the character Miya Osamu that has such a huge significance for me that actually made me settle that decision which I simmer since last January to actually take the plunge.

The team’s motto ‘We don’t need the memories” seems saddening, but it does not mean we must dump away the horrible shit- it means that we do not hold them like precious treasures but learn from it and grow from that experiences. And it is funny, as Inari which the school is named after, is a patron god of foxes which concide with that said shrine that I climbed as a symbolic passing that I am over these tough times just landed to me.

I got to talk about Miya Osamu, my beloved boy which I affectionately called him my boyfriend, that propelled my decision to quit that job, so in short- he is the other half of a mega powerful duo alongside with his brother Atsumu known to be pretty much a terror (I mean even the way they cheer, you can simply lose your shit)- and he is super chill vs his otherwise hot-tempered brother, a lot of people said he is physically better than his brother in terms of stamina and reflexes but however Osamu is aware that he did not have this demonic hunger like Atsumu to pursue further, even a flashback which Atsumu is accepted at Youth Camp-Osamu said frankly that ‘You loved volleyball more than me’. So BKAK colleague was like oh you know Osamu end up working in the food industry, opening his own restaurant because of his passion of food. I did not get it until I watched the speech of Hunger with Osamu in the last set point that gave me that sign and it goes like “When you’re hungry, and you eat a small mouthful of something…it makes you even hungrier.”

And I be like holy shit, what???, and I thought to myself, maybe I am becoming like him, just going by the flow, scared to move out of this comfort zone to search for tastier food which unlike me, I blaze through endless food options to keep me happy (Thank god that Samu has the same passion as me, which is food), which I nearly ugly-sob for such a simple line (Kudos to Hideaki Kabumoto for such a beautiful performance), and watching the video essay of him, made me be like alright- I am going to submit the resignation letter.

Of course, after that said submission, it is where I really struggle myself mentally, if I actually made the right decision, basically gaslighting my ass to all these memories, and I am so grateful that time I decided to rewatch Haikyuu with my mum. And of course rewatching Haikyuu was that source of comfort which I look forward every night after work to watch it.

We talk over the people being like the Ushijimas and the Oikawas over me simply leaving for a new chapter.

Ok imagine an Asian 60 year old mother who binge over K-Dramas screaming like a mad football fan with the matches, and being like I love my boys so much, and Sugawara (My favourite moment from my mum when Daichi is substituted by Ennoshita, my mum be like why Suga did not replace Daichi, I liked him), and she asked me the reason you are able to quit, because of Hinata’s determination and Kageyama’s passion, which I tried to show my mum that Osamu panel, being that same reason and she did not understand why as she said you will be overstuffed.

So we reached the Inarizaki arc, which of course I enjoyed as hell, and it came to that part when we watch the Osamu speech and it suddenly clicked to my mum as I see food as passion, which I figure that I need to venture out to make me hungry again. So she was like oh so the passion of the things you enjoy is akin to a good meal, and she is like yep.

Long story, we managed to get the final date of me working here, which is coincidentally today- and I took the approach of another character from Inarizaki that help me in this transition period is Shinsuke Kita, I know super weird as he is an introvert unlike me, and what strike me is his composure to take things as ‘things as byproducts’ and it was that philosophy to take things as a process, that I even use that line as the header for my handover list. I even repeat that mantra to myself that I must hold these experiences as byproducts of a process, and holding that scene of Kita being happy that they play that final match despite the loss to Karasuno.

On the morning of that last day- I was playing Kita clips to calm me down, to prevent myself for getting emotional over my last day- and I told my mum, I want to be happy like them (akin Osamu in his restaurant and Kita, in his farming job) and she said yes, like Kita in his farm and it gave me so much comfort. And I blasted Hikari Are to calm myself down, knowing there is a bright light to break out of the darkness, that I can conquer my own iron walls.

And it is funny on that said day, I met a bunch of Japanese high-school kids coming for a visit which I broke the ice of telling them I played a chill version of Hikari Are (Haikyuu anime Opening 3), which one  knew that anime and I asked what is her favourite and this girl, from a country prefecture said that she likes Tsukishima which I am like yeh, my favourites from Haikyuu (in my best Japanese, which I self-taught myself during the pandemic), is Inarizaki and Miya Osamu, and my best Japanese adding Kita, the captain. And I spend that day actually trying to make small talk over these Japanese high school kids, which made my heart so happy that even the sensei was kind to see that I am trying so hard to speak in Japanese, which I left the scene with a full heart.

And it struck to me coincidentally, that in the end of things, Haikyuu brought me that strength and courage to move on to my new chapter. Yes, the path may be different as of now, but I am so glad to have that courage to make that path thanks to a small volleyball anime as the lyrics of ひかりあれ go

Hikari are //Daichi wo keru riyuu wa tada hitotsu //Motto mabayuku ore wa toberu Hikari are //Kimi no kyou no kagayaki ga //Mayoeru tomo no ashita wo terasu yo

(Let there be light //There's only one reason to kick the ground I can fly even more radiantly //Let there be light Your sparkles from today will light up a hesitating friend's way)

And I am so grateful for the once flightless crows, and the strong foxes to blaze me through that path, to find my hunger again

So ありがとうございます！古舘ー先生！！！for creating such a motivational piece that blaze through my new path 💕

#i am sorry if I am being sappy #but Haikyuu has saved me dude #Haikyuu #Miya Osamu #Inarizaki #haruichi furudate #cat talks about things

[makingspiritualityreal]

The Best Moments of my practice as an Intuitive Astrologer

Even though I have been studying Astrology for years and I have been in touch with it since I was a kid, raised in a family with strong spiritual and religious inclinations, I only got the courage to express my thoughts more through my creations last year. One of the reasons for that is that I felt like no matter how much reading and study I have done, it never quite felt enough.

It didn't feel as if I was getting close enough to the truth, or that there would ever be a definitive point, where I could think "now I have learned enough, and I am competent enough to share". Another reason I had is that I'm a very intuitive learner and I was plagued with a lot of self-doubt, fearing that my impressions and feelings are not valuable enough to be shared. This is sadly the flaw of public schooling, as systemic education teaches us not to use our intuitive perceptions, as I have painfully learned while getting my University degree.

As time passed, I have seen many people with less talent or knowledge express themselves without shame, and I've come to the conclusion that the only way to deal with this issue is to start somewhere. Then I learned more about Vedic Astrology and realised, that what is so commonly socially criticised in people is an expression of their past life talent, no doubt as an attempt at mass enslavement and social oppression.

Over time, I started to share my gifts with less and less reservations whenever inspiration came, testing the waters in various online communities, and finding out over time that even experienced, well-learned Vedic Astrologers rooted in traditional culture and knowledge valued and praised my input. I have since lost all doubt, as I have not once been disappointed by my intuitive skills. As a result, I practically stopped consuming other people's content altogether, relying on pure channelling of my intuitive talents instead.

Occasionally, however, I watch content from some of the more renowned Astrologers, especially when my friends want to share it with me. My favourite moment is when I see these people, who technically have a much bigger following, express something, that I have noticed from my own real life observations of Astrology. Then it turns out my intuitive perception matches with in-depth truth of Vedic theory. I used to fear my own personal narrow experience is not enough, but it always inevitably turns out, that my intuitive perception is so wide, I somehow skip the necessity for a lot of research and can make accurate conclusions with less data.

The best moment of that sort for me was when I watched a very detailed Youtube video, containing a lot of elaboration and explanation on certain Nakshatra characteristics...which I mentioned myself, albeit in much less details, in a post I published months before the video even came out. There was no way anyone in this situation got inspired by the other party. It was just the synchronicity of the general patterns of the Universe, noticed by both of us.

Knowing, that my perception is equal to someone widely regarded in Astrology circles has been the biggest blessing and a confirmation of my talent I have ever experienced, and a truly healing moment for me as a person, who was always bullied, felt inadequate and thought that things could only be achieved with years of tough work and sticking to a rule book.

#personal #astrology #astrologer #astro community #vedic astrology

[leclerqued]

Happy Monday! 🧡✨

Normally October is a month where I’ve settled into an autumnal routine, my school stress has levelled itself out and I’m actually in a happy place - but now that the deadline for my final part of the study is approaching… yeah no that autumnal routine is out of the window and the stress is back in full force. So, this weeks motivation will all be about stress!

Tim. S. Grover once said: “Stress keeps you sharp, it challenges you in ways you never imagines and forces you to solve issues and manage situations that send weaker people running for cover.” And while that holds a piece of truth, do I fully agree with it? No. Stress these days is one of the reasons so many of us struggle with anxiety and get burned out. But stress, that adrenaline rush, does often help us stop overthinking over the things that give us stress. I always go in focus mode, not stopping until it is done.

But it wouldn’t be a Monday Motivation if I didn’t actually did have something to help deal with stress and it is something that comes so natural to all of us that we forget we do it every minute - breathing. Just taking a moment to close your eyes, breathe in deeply through your nose for the count of four, holding your breath for a couple of seconds and then pushing the air out through your mouth for the count of eight… it is the greatest way to relax the mind and the body. Stress endures hyperventilation and hyperventilation is a sign to our body that we’re in danger - which means we go into lockdown… and none of us want to go back into lockdown.

So, if you are dealing with something stressful this week: breathe along with me. Sit yourself down, close your eyes, breathe and know that you are stronger than you think and life only throws things at you that you can handle.

Now, I’m going to go and focus on this assessment! Sending you the biggest hug and kiss for this week. You’re not alone 😘

Good morning darling!

I've actually decided a couple of days ago that autumn is my favorite season. Especially this month, the Halloween vibes, the weather is still nice and I don't have to stress over holidays or exams.

Since I've finished to attend all my lessons atm I'm just enjoying playing videogames (actually only World of Warcraft) and chilling. Covid has slapped me in the face multiple times now, I've been ill for more than 3 weeks and even tho I'm not positive any more, I still have weird symptoms (rn I feel like I have bruises all over my body). It's tough and I've gained a lot of weight, have been neglecting eating in a proper healthy way bc covid & medicine would make me unbearably hungry, and whilst I thought my depression was about to get better, my father decided to scare the shit out of me behaving like he was capable of hurting me and destroying my stuff.

It's tough, but I have people helping me go through this. I have a community online and I can focus on many things in-game, keeping my mind busy until my body is strong enough to pick myself up and go through hell again.

I'm sorry this felt like removing a big thing from my chest, but I hope my perspective over this situation will give you some insight since you're always so positive.

Thanks for your kind messages, as always, as they make me reflect about myself and give me a big push forwards ❤️

Hope you have a wonderful week.

#babssionate

[fruit-teeth]

I had a bit of a breakthrough tonight while I was sobbing in my room and I feel compelled to share it for some reason so here I go

Lately I’ve been dealing a lot with trust issues. Specifically: I’m socially anxious and I have very few irl friends (and online friends for that matter, I’m socially anxious on here too), but a big part of that is that I tend to instantly assume that people either a) don’t like me, b) like me at first, but then realize I’m annoying and decide to stop talking to me or c) will end up hurting me in some way if I get too close to them. These fears of mine are, as I’ve come to realize, a reflection of things that actually did occur during my life.

I had a friend who I thought of as my best friend for many, many years, only to have her randomly stop talking to me and join a completely different friend group. The last time I saw her, she barely said hello to me and acted like I was just an acquaintance. That encounter upset me so badly that I remember hiding in the bathroom and trying not to cry because I was so heartbroken. Even though it’s been years since then (this happened my senior year of high school and I’m an adult now), it led to a spiral of shame, anger, and resentment that eventually led to me deciding I would never call someone my best friend again. Not only that, but that same year, I had my high school graduation party, and I’m not even exaggerating when I say that NONE, and I mean NONE of my friends or really even any of my classmates showed up. I felt extremely betrayed by this, even more so when one those friends expected me to show up to HER party (allegedly she’d had to cover a shift for a coworker at her job at the last minute, which is why she didn’t show, but I still doubt the validity of this). These weren’t the only instances, make no mistake - I’ve had other friends that mocked my interests, and even one that turned out to be a straight-up bully towards me. She made fun of me for liking My Little Pony, and there was even a horrifying moment where she mockingly imitated one of my stims as a way of ‘teasing’ me. High school was tough on its own, but a bad system of friends made it even harder than it ever needed to be.

It’s been years since then, sure, but this has really destroyed my confidence when it’s come to making and keeping friends. I worry constantly if maybe my old friends thought I was annoying and that’s why I was so easy to cast aside like nothing, so now when I get into new friendships, I hide my true personality because I’m terrified they’ll see the real me and think it’s annoying or weird. At the same time, though, when someone is being nice to me and genuinely wants to hang out with me, I always think to myself “this has to be a trap or something, this is too good to be true”. I have a very small circle of friends now, both online and in person, but even with those friends I worry that when they see me or think about me they think to themselves “oh god not Mara again”. This leads to me being very distant, which also causes these friendships to dissipate sometimes. Social interaction is already confusing sometimes thanks to being autistic, but it’s made even worse thanks to the history I have with making and keeping friends.

I started thinking over these things today and remembering all the pain, the anger, everything, and I started feeling really hopeless. I started to feel like I was going to be alone forever, because I couldn’t trust anyone to not secretly hate me or leave me when I wasn’t convenient for them anymore. But it was during this that I suddenly remembered a comment my dad had made a couple years ago: “you don’t remember every time you ate a decent apple, but you certainly remember the times you bit into rotten ones”.

And…yeah. I don’t think about all the times people were kind to me, or the times people were gentle and said nice things to me. When I think about friendships or people in general, I tend to ruminate on all the things that have gone wrong, the times I was ignored or criticized, the moments I realized someone didn’t actually care about me. This realization broke me, though I can’t really hate myself for it. My brain is trying to protect me from future heartbreak by convincing me that there’s no point in maintaining those relationships, that my heart will just get stepped on again. That’s why the negative experiences get amplified while the positive ones fall to the wayside, it’s a method of protection. But it’s a rock and a hard place - either I open myself up to trusting again and get hurt, or I keep closing myself off and hurt myself by isolating from everyone. There’s no way to truly avoid or anticipate pain, though - we can only cope with it when it happens. That’s at least one thing I’ve fully realized lately, and it was NOT an easy conclusion to come to.

The times my old friends abandoned me, mistreated me, or shattered my heart will forever live in my memory. But the times my current friends have said kind things to me, hugged me when they were happy to see me, shared their happy moments and interests with me, even told me they loved me…those are things I can’t let myself forget. Even if my brain is trying desperately to protect me from feeling pain, I know now just how important it is to counteract those anxious thoughts with the memories of what it’s like to be loved and appreciated, because that’s one thing I don’t think anyone should ever forget.

So…I guess I’m sharing this because I think I’m not the only one dealing with this. I know how difficult it is to make friends and to open yourself up to trusting others after you’ve experienced pain, but I think finding people you can trust and who will love you for you can feel very worth it once it happens. Sorry I’m not making sense because it’s very late and I need to go to sleep but I hope you understand me

#geez this turned out very long #I’m emotional rn sorry #just me things #text post #long post #social anxiety #friendships #trust issues #healing #actually autistic #bullying #vent #my writing