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#please appreciate my stupid meme
bouncydragon · 9 months
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Tommy: I love you but what the fuck, Alfie?
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obimaulartfire · 9 months
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A Maul and Savage interaction based on a text exchange I had with one of my friends. (after I spilled coffee on myself Twice in one day, GOd)
I was like, "yeah I think that's what their dynamic is."
(@savageopressbignaturals I hope I made his naturals big enough lmaooo)
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dittobooty · 7 months
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I saw this post today and knew what I had to do
I feel like my Shuggy divorce playlist really adds to the immersion
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lazyeddie · 9 months
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I have a genuine question to those who have iPads-
How does one download audio/music from here like- YouTube audio/music without getting a virus or it getting corrupted?
I tried searching on youtube but I don’t really understand it- please I need help- I just want to make dumb silly videos again ;n;
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m4tthewmurd0ck · 4 months
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Tom Blyth x Actress!Reader
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i try to avoid descriptors but i do use she/her! click [HERE] for my tom blyth masterlist :)
you post a meme, but of course the internet takes it too far. set a few days after the vogue interviews, so tbosas has been out just over a month. we’ll just say december 22 since it came out november 17. also i changed the ending for the film because eventually you’ll be working on the sequel hehshsdb
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tagged; ewanmitchell
liked by houseofthedragonhbo and others…
yourname me trying to sneak into theaters so i can see people’s reactions to tbosas but i don’t want them to know it’s me. alternatively; coriolanus walking around knowing damn well what he did to sejanus and lucy gray 🤬
username excuse me i’m wheezing 😭
↳ username she really tagged ewan snsjdhxjsushxa
rachelzegler 😂😂😂😂
yourname has liked this comment
username she better avenge her boyfriend in the sequel!!!!
↳ username has a sequel been confirmed already???
↳ username not officially but with how things ended there better be one. talk about a cliffhanger!
↳ username can anyone spoil it for me how does it end??
↳ justiceforsejanus well since you asked!! after the cabin fight scene with nova may and coryo, he does manage to knock the gun out of her hand and attempt to choke her to death BUT my gworl makes an escape and goes who knows where. cut to coriolanus with his 3rd hairstyle of the movie and he looks out before it cuts to black and then the quote from future him “it’s the things we love most that destroy us”. you think it’s over right but NO MID CREDIT SCENE!!!! he knocks on a door and nova may answers. she’s obviously shocked and all he does is that stupid grin (🥵) and say “we’re gonna make a deal”. THEN the screen cuts to black and… that’s all we get. definitely potential for a sequel
↳ username waaaait that means yourname and tomblyth will work together again! and this time their characters might interact more!
username why does she always post ewan when she’s dating tom?
↳ yournamefan relax becky it’s a meme.
↳ username just saying i wouldn’t appreciate that.
↳ yourname good thing i’m dating tom and not you then isn’t it 🤭 also i love you yournamefan 💕
ewanmitchell if i had a dollar for every time you used this screenshot 😩
↳ yourname omg it’s lucerys killer aaaahhhh!!!!
↳ ewanmitchell i hate you 😩😩
enews uh-oh! yourname posting about her on screen boyfriend and not tomblyth? 👀
↳ yourname please take several seats
yourname has blocked enews
username poor tomblyth
↳ username right. yourname isn’t even that pretty he could do so much better!
↳ username 👏👏👏👏
↳ username i hope he leaves her soon.
yourname has disabled the comment section
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Tom Blyth x Actress!Reader taglist — if you requested to be tagged and don’t see your user, I wasn’t able to tag you! if you’d like to be added, let me know!
@daenerysqueenofhearts | @coconut-dreamz | @spencerstits | @callsignwidow | @inf4ntdeath | @upsidedownjill | @toeoffrog | @bada-lee-ily | @sassyangel16 | @or-was-it-just-a-dream | @jolleluvsyou | @ennycutie | @ashcosmo
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Hi! I noticed there were a lot of subreddit blogs getting made lately, and I figured I could make my own. So Here's a tumblr version of r/OutOfTheLoop
If you are out of date on the latest topic whether that be news, drama, meme, etc.? A little confused at what people mean by clown jumpscare? @out-of-the-loop-official is here for you!
Only rules are:
Ask your question in an unbiased manner.
Try to be specific, if your question is too vague or general to understand what it's asking about, it won't be posted.
Please be civil!
Try to answer the question or ask your own legitimate questions in the replies, no judgement here.
I reserve the right to refuse to post your question for any or no reason.
If you know of a blog more applicable to your question (especially the ones mentioned below), please send your ask to them instead:
Would appreciate a signal boost from @no-stupid-questions-official @confessions-official @fuck-you-official @am-i-the-asshole-official @rrelationshipadvice
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yoshida-chiyo · 5 months
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Sunghoon (ENHYPEN) realizing he has a crush on you
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pairing: sunghoon x fem!reader
word count: ~0.4k
disclaimer: No images used in this post belong to me. All credits to respective creators. Contact for credit/removal. Your work is valued.
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casually flexes his muscles while pretending to stretch, hoping you'll be impressed
stares at you for a solid minute during a group hangout and suddenly forgets how to blink
blinking is overrated anyway 🙄
constantly teases and flirts but acts like it's just casual banter
"Oh, you dropped something? Must be my jaw because you're stunning." abhjdwujdbsk.
practices saying your name in front of the mirror to make sure he doesn't stutter when talking to you
ends up giggling cuz he can't contain himself ( >⩊< ).
develops a sudden interest in all your favorite things, like your favorite movies, books, and even your weird obsession with collecting antique spoons
When you ask him about it, he just shrugs ¯_(ツ)_/¯.
gets overly conscious of how he smells and starts wearing that cologne he swore he'd never use because "it's too mainstream." 
hey, anything to impress you, right? ツ
tries to impress you with his "cooking skills" but burns the pasta
still insists it's a new culinary trend called "extra crispy al dente." 😁
becomes the unofficial photographer of the group, taking candid shots of you when you're not looking
insists it's for his "photography portfolio" ( ◡̀_◡́), but everyone knows what's up
can't focus on anything you're saying cuz he's too busy imagining the two of you holding hands and walking into the sunset 🫠
gets caught daydreaming more than once
sits there and spaces out, trying to figure out how to confess to you
attempts to be poetic but ends up sounding like a romantic disaster
"Your eyes are like... um, stars. Yeah, stars. Because they shine... and stuff." 🙄 ahh, my dear hoon
lowkey drops hints about his feelings in casual conversations
"You know, if I were to have a crush on someone hypothetically, they might have the most beautiful smile ever. Just saying." 😌
awkwardly stumbles over words while complimenting you but manages to blurt out, "Uh, you look... really nice today. I mean, you always do, but, um, today is just... extra nice."
gets all flustered when you compliment him back 🤭
steals glances at you when he thinks you're not looking, only to get caught and pretend he was inspecting the nearby wall for potential paint flaws 🤪
rearranges his entire schedule to 'accidentally' bump into you more often ◝(ᵔᵕᵔ)◜
spends an entire day debating whether or not to text you first
finally musters up the courage, only to send a meme instead ( •_ •)
starts using your favorite emojis in his texts, thinking it's a subtle way to convey that he's totally chill and not at all thinking about you 24/7 🙈
initially types out a really cheesy name to save in his contacts, then backspaces furiously, trying to maintain a semblance of coolness
thinks for a while and ends up with a simple "[your name]" but with a subtle smiley at the end. :)
accidentally calls you "babe" in the middle of a conversation and tries to cover it up by fake coughing. (≖_≖ ) smooth, hoon, real smooth
has this stupid grin on his face whenever you are brought up in the conversation
denies having a crush when his friends tease him about it
"Me, crushing on [your name]? 🤨 Pfft, you're delusional!" 
nervous laughter
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Copyright © yukimura-chiyo - All Rights Reserved
Note: Please refrain from reposting my work. If you appreciate it and would like to share, kindly link directly to the original post. Thank you for respecting the effort and creativity put into this content.
ty @deobizonctzen ⸝⸝ᵕᴗᵕ⸝⸝
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ohbabydollie · 3 months
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omg the schlatt x masc fem s/o headcanons make me go absolutely insane ckksjfksjdkskskksk please please please do more
LMAO i’m glad u liked them
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everyone asks you what to get him for his birthday since you know him best and ted took you on a mini shopping spree which you were excited for!!
as soon as you guys were walking through the mall you stopped at a victoria secret, looking at all the lacy panties and bras before picking up a thong
“i think he would like this, it’s not his size though” you say before asking a worker for their biggest size
a bunch of stupid shirts with saying like “i ❤️ getting pegged” “must be on estrogen from the way my rack keeps growing” etc.
the biggest monster dildo you can find at spencer’s with a tube of flavored lube
of course while you got him a few stupid gag gifts you got him shirts and things he would genuinely enjoy
getting mad at him and saying you’ll shove things up his ass and nicknames getting more insulting
“fisting your ass tonight, no prep” “i’ll stick my foot up your ass, bitch” “shut up, that’s why your hole is fucking gaping” “move broad”
schlatt laughs at it sometimes, kissing you on the forehead as you call him a broad and wrapping an arm around your waist
when he asks for your food you feed it to him, airplane and all
if he’s struggling to open a bottle or something and getting frustrated you’ll calmly grab it and open it before handing it to him with a wink and kiss
yk how he was pretending to eat pussy in that one chuckle sandwich vid? you pretend to part open and eat his ass
when you two walk off together you kick his ass and/or the back of his knees because you think it’s funny
yk those videos that are like “when the 5’2 homie finally agrees to cross dressing (he’s definitely getting it tonight)”
yeah you send those to jay all the time and tell him that the height is slowly going up so you’re just waiting until it’s 6’2
along with other memes like that
if anyone tries to defeminize you he’s on their ass IMMEDIATELY!!
“she might as well be your boyfriend with tits and in a dress” some girl says laughing slightly “well she’s my girlfriend with tits and more femininity than you could ever dream of” schlatt says crossing his arms “not ran through either”
doesn’t like it when men flirt with you but finds it funny once you get tired of them talking about fucking you and get started talking about fingering their asshole and they grimace in disgust before he appears
“hey sweetheart” he says wrapping his arm around your shoulders “thanks for keepin’ her fingers warm for me champ” he says to the guy jokingly as you giggle
posting him with songs like eating by CP hollywood & suki
“fuck is this?” he asks showing you your latest instagram story “an appreciation post for you” you say innocently smiling
Silly costumes for bits or for halloween parties!!
schlatt dressed as jessica rabbit n u as roger rabbit!! you as a prim and proper doctor n schlatt as a sexy nurse, complete with the fishnets and fake syringe
u get the silly costumes n he gets the sexy slutty ones
your behavior gets so normalized schlatt doesn’t even bat an eyelash at it anymore
“pegging session tonight?” you ask him, grinning as he rolls his eyes “only if you’re in leather”
groping at his man boobs, ass and thighs
“goo goo ga ga, i want milk” you say groping at his chest as schlatt pushes your face away, annoyed
if he’s ever walking in front of of you, checking out his ass and whistling at him
nsfw!!
drunkenly going up to schlatt at a costume party and saying “you look so pretty in your costume princess, imma eat you out when we get home” before schlatt pulls you into his lap and telling you “we’ll 69 it” as he undoes your tie and you go red in the face
making out with him at a party, parting with your face flushed and a string of saliva connecting the both of you
the first thing you say, looking up at him with hazy eyes, “no homo” schlatt looks at you confused before yelling “ITS NOT FUCKING GAY”
likes watching you walk around in flowy dresses and skirts knowing the second you both are alone he’s gonna be lifting them up and having you sobbing for him
he loves taking you into a bathroom, lifting your skirt snd fucking you into oblivion
“where’s the big strong girl huh? the one that said she was gonna peg me, huh?” he asks with your knees over his forearms (full nelson) and making you look in the mirror, completely weak to his touches and unable to escape
“look at my girl when she’s all cute and submissive” he says grinning and forcing you to look into the mirror
“where’s that bratty mouth you had earlier, hm?” he asks while he has you bent over on a counter as he goes in and out of your cunt, making you tighten up on his length
is mean to you in bed but there are times where he’s soft with you, calling himself lucky for having you, calling you his pretty wife, etc.
aftercare is top tier, will clean you up and get you food or drinks, whatever you want
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throwingmetothelions · 10 months
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NSFW ALPHABET - Noah Sebastian
I’m once again reminding you because some of y’all don’t seem to understand and it’s making my fucking eye twitch … THESE ARE THEORIES. I know that some of you are younger, and you are new to how fandoms operate, but the whole point of this is to make a compilation of theories about someone based on content that is free floating in the fandom. The information that I’ve been given by people in private is never something that you will ever see me actually write about, so don’t think it is. NONE OF THIS WAS FOUND BY DIGGING OR PRYING (THE TWO ACTIVITIES SOME OF YALL CANNOT STAY AWAY FROM). This shit is theories and personal beliefs based off things we have as a fandom. Do not fuck it up for everyone by accusing anyone of prying. Do not ask me questions about unrelated shit. Do not ask me to answer your thoughts and concerns. ANYWAYS HERE YA GO BESTIES.
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
Noah is the one with the forethought to go ahead and grab a dirty t-shirt and keep it by the side of the bed. There’s probably already water he was drinking, and that’s gonna have to be good enough lol mans will check up on you, but if you’re looking for full blown mushy romance book level aftercare? Yeah, it doesn’t live here.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
Noah is clearly working hard on his physical appearance. From what I can see there was a lot of bulking going on, but we see big ass muscles in those arms. He’s very proud of that. Noah isn’t the type to get transfixed and brain-dumb over something, but I feel like he likes legs. Likes the way they wrap around him, and the way they bend when he pushes someone’s knees back when he’s fucking them.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
Oh boy. Has absolutely tried his own a few times out of pure curiosity. Tries his best to just jerk off in a shower so he doesn’t have to clean anything up, but he’ll wipe it away with something out of the dirty laundry bin. The man literally liked a meme regarding this so I KNOW I’m RIGHT when I say he wants to cum in you and he wants it so deep it doesn’t come back out. He doesn’t even want to see it.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
Has an obsession with panties and I mean this in the “if yours go disappearing please go bang on his door” way. There’s something about the way they feel, all the colors and patterns (this stupid nerd would buy you Naruto panties and I hate that). Like he would jerk off with them wrapped around his dick and send you pictures about it.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
He’s pretty experienced, but I don’t think it’s in the way you all think. You can have so much casual sex and not really be learning a ton, ya know? Like if all you’re getting are random quick hookups for the most part … how experienced are you actually? That being said - he’s ABSOLUTELY the type to have read up on and researched techniques just to keep in his back pocket.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Ha. Ha. Hahaha. I’m laughing because he has a Mars in Sagittarius, so this is going a few ways. He likes to be spontaneous when he has time, so anytime you say “hey do you wanna try …” THAT is his new favorite position. Immediately. The frankness and the roughhousing that comes with that says he would play wrestle until you were no longer playing, and your hands were held above your head while his big ass body all but put you through the actual mattress. So.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
Goofy?!? He’s too goddamn nervous to be goofy what do you MEAN. His heart is about to thump out of his chest because, if like most women you wait for him to make the first move, he’s so fucking shy about it. He would definitely appreciate it if you laughed off things like him getting ahead of himself or making a funny noise when you switch positions though because it works as an icebreaker.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
He trims it all up. I know he does not have a ton of hair everywhere, but obviously when someone has a lot of tattoos, you can no longer truly see the amount of hair they have on their body. His legs are actually a lot hairier than you think, and he has a happy trail, so I think he just trims it all up.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
Oh, it’s Noah’s time to shine. If you give him a reason to be he could be SO romantic. This bastard is an artist. He is a writer. He can set a vibe unlike any other man you’ve ever met (and I swear to god the LED lights are involved unfortunately). If it’s slowing down that you need … Noah’s got you. Neck kisses, eye contact … just please don’t expect it every time. You would absolutely have to tell him ahead of time.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
I actually firmly believe that he used to not jack off a lot, but now that he’s working out and his stamina has increased he probably does it a little more now. Likes the way his rings and bracelet feel when they touch his dick. Doesn’t make too much noise, but he’s a big lip biter. As we said, likes to do it in showers, so after they play which is also when he’s sweaty and full of adrenaline.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
What we’re not gonna do right now is get into the Mommy Issues ™️, and I think if you asked him to call you that he would tell you to get the fuck out (I’m serious) BUT … he could absolutely fall asleep with your nipple in his mouth. Like as a comfort thing. He would ABSOLUTELY ask to watch a show with you and slowly and wordlessly unzip your hoodie and take one of your boobs out and just kinda hang out there in the quiet dark while he sucks away and THAT is actually a kink. I do not take criticism thanks.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
He loves him a good risk, but not if people he knows could be involved. Like he’ll wanna fuck at your house because he really doesn’t want Jolly to hear you, but if it was a bunch of strangers at a bar he wouldn’t think twice about fucking you in the bathroom. He also really loves the bed honestly. Mans is a big ol lazy bear after he comes and he definitely wants to pass the fuck out after yall go at it.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
Seeing you in his bands merch gets his dick absolutely rock solid. We aren’t gonna talk about the narcissist streak he has (I also do not take criticism on this because believe me it’s there), but seeing you in a shirt that barely covers your ass AND has his bands name on it is too much. Also, running your hands over his chest? I feel this one in my bones dude I just know that this makes him feel some sort of way.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
Noah wouldn’t actually ever involve one of the direct members of the band into a threesome. I’M SORRY. TRUST ME THATS NOT GONNA STOP ME FROM READING THE FICS AND HAVING MY SILLY LITTLE THEORIES BUT he just wouldn’t. Too close. He would, however, tag in Davis, Kodi or Jesse and I know you bitches wouldn’t complain about that. Again, please god don’t pull the mommy card on him. With this one, I see it being something like he’s either immediately going to tell you that he can’t do this at all now, or he’s going to do it, but then he’s going to feel some type of way after, and it’s actually really going to affect him. He’s going to get inside his head and have a meltdown.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
He’s a giver. I’m the one that gave you that post. I’m the one that one of his exs contacted. I don’t know a lot about all the things in the world, but I know a little something in this department. Noah eats pussy like a starved man and there’s nothing more dangerous than a man that is hot and enthusiastic. You stand 0 chance. He’s highly skilled. He loves getting blowjobs, but if you’re looking at scales they’re absolutely tipping one way.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
So, for all of you out there that may not know, when a man doesn’t have great stamina or he doesn’t last very long cardio and working out can really help that. Noah has done a 180 in terms of exercise, so I think he’s the type to deliver a fast and hard pace but not really think about it. Like he’s so into it and he’s taking in the sounds you make not realizing that he’s picked up the pace.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
Doesn’t love them because CONTRARY TO POPULAR BELIEF MEN DONT ALWAYS GET TURNED ON LIKE LIGHTSWITCHES. Noah would need to be teased all day while he’s trying to do other shit if you want to just spontaneously pull him into a broom closet and expect him to perform.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
Again … birthchart says he takes risks but I believe they’re calculated. Like the risk of fingering you when you’re on the phone with someone is one he’s willing to take, but he planned it. He also loves to take risks in the bedroom. What happens if he rubs here? What happens if he bites there? Hmmm.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
Noah strikes me as a singular really long round kind of guy. Sure, he’ll get you off once before he even takes his clothes off, but I do think he gets sleepy easily by nature because he has personality traits that align with Snorlax and Winnie the Pooh. Noah will absolutely make it feel like it’s stretched on, and he won’t stop until he’s not sure what language you’re muttering, but he’s not taking a break and jumping back into it. His idea of a break is eating you out while he calms down.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
I think he may have experimented once or twice (we’re not gonna pretend like he hasn’t been pictured with three different dildos before) but he doesn’t really see a need. Now, for you, he’s absolutely gonna do whatever it takes to get you off. You wanna use a toy while you’re fucking him? Go for it. He really wants to watch you.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
Here’s the thing. Noah doesn’t MEAN to. He’s not upset that he did, but seriously he didn’t mean for you to see the strip of skin on his belly when he stretched. He didn’t know that him moving your hair to the side to kiss behind your ear would have you gnawing at your lip. He doesn’t do it on purpose, but when you crawl over him and kiss him until he can’t breathe and then call him an asshole for doing that all day it makes him want to fuck you until the sun comes up.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
It’s all under his breath.
“Jesus Christ”.
“Holy …”.
“Yes - fuck, yes”.
He’s the type to grunt while he’s biting his knuckle when he comes. See, and I know that not all of you have thought about this but it’s the fucking truth, most men are conditioned to be very quiet when they cum and it’s because they were once horny teenagers and they couldn’t keep their hands out of their pants. They had to sneak. Noah has been sharing rooms with people his entire life … this man hasn’t learned to let go and let it all fly. He holds back.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
Random headcanon? Weed makes Noah incredibly fucking horny, and he can come twice when he smokes because his dick won’t relax if he only cums once. I don’t know why y’all all say he used to smoke … yeah he used to smoke cigarettes and quit, but he still smokes weed - just a whole lot less. That’s why it’s exciting when he takes a few hits. I had an ex that was like this and it’s actually pretty hot so I’m assigning it to Noah because it makes the most sense with him.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
There are actual bitchbabies on tumblr.com that are mad because they say that nobody should say anything about the fact that we can clearly see his dick through some of his stage outfits. Listen to me - yeah it’s weird to jump in a strangers inbox and talk about your unhealthy obsession and what you want to do. But. He is a man, and he has a penis, and this is an NSFW alphabet based on theories, and it is not my fault that it is fucking visible through his goddamn pants. THAT BEING SAID BASED OFF OF WHAT WE CAN SEE ON BEYONCES INTERNET - he’s a shower and it ain’t small.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
He gets in his head so often. The number one sex drive killer is stress, and I think he definitely, if he has a partner, can go for a long time without having sex if he’s got too much band business. You would definitely need some open communication. Although lucky for you - he celebrates band wins and personal growth with sex. I guarantee that one positive phone call from Matt would mean you get bent over the kitchen counter.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
I think he’s falling asleep pretty quickly but it’s also because of the setting. Like I said, our boy loves a good fuck in a bed. That, combined with the soft LEDs, the lofi beats and no overhead lights means he’s already accidentally set the stage for sleep. Just blow out the candles and tell him ya love him because he’s gone.
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elleloquently · 1 year
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invisible string [4] : ellie williams
part three
| college!ellie x female!reader - thank you guys so much for patiently (and excitedly) waiting for this update! school is absolutely so busy it's sickening, so it's hard to write as often as i want, but i really want to aim for at least one update per week! writing this chapter was so much fun so please let me know what you think... as always thank you for your love, requests are open, and reblogs and comments are always loved and appreciated! love ya <3 (p.s shout out to a creepy owner irl who inspired part of this fic)
| c/w - anxious reader, swearing, mention of weed, alcohol, men!
studying was very dull compared to texting a pretty girl.
ellie entered your life in a whirlwind, notes filling up your once empty walls and endless texts and pictures cluttering up your phone.
the texts came in slowly at first, maybe a few short conversations every other day, mostly complaining about how much homework the professor of your shared class was packing in before finals week hit. then entered stupid memes, random pictures... and suddenly you were staying up until 3am learning about each other, despite your 8am class.
it had only been a few days, and you knew that you were getting too attached.
it was a feeling that made your stomach sink, the realization of how much your mood improved with a simple text. you were happiest in class, sitting next to ellie, even when your hand cramped from filling out pages of study guides.
sighing, you turned your music up louder and crashed back onto your bed, cushioned by a multitude of throw pillows and blankets. you weren't getting much studying done anyway.
the song grew quiet as your phone chimed, music to your ears.
Zero progress.
attached was a photo of the study guide, the amount of completed questions matching those of your own packet.
you quickly typed out a response to ellie, short and to the point.
literally sickening
it was only a few seconds before she replied:
There goes my weekend!
you replied in agreement before forcing yourself back up to glance over your textbook. you've been lingering on the same chapter for over an hour. if you were truly honest with yourself, you probably only read about two paragraphs... you were distracted.
you hardly had time to even daydream due to how busy you were, but it's not like it mattered. you gaze lingered to the collaboration of drawings made by yourself and ellie, still sticking to the wall. your phone sounded once again, pulling you out of a sleepy daze. figuring it was ellie again, you closed your textbook in an act of resignment.
the smile that appeared once you heard the text notification slowly faded upon closer inspection.
it wasn't ellie. it was a friend, one you admittedly haven't spoken to much as of recent. you hadn't really meant to ghost her, but your schedules didn't really align much. this time of year you were so busy with assignments and work, and she was busy with... well, literally anything else.
her message consisted of only two words, call me. it was short and vague so you immediately obliged, worry taking over your senses.
she answered on the second ring, speaking before you had even opened your mouth.
"please tell me you don't have plans tonight," she urged.
you wince, already preparing an excuse. "i'm studying..." you start. it wasn't a complete lie, you really had been making an effort.
her disappointment is obvious by the way she sighs your name into the phone speaker. "i've barely seen you all semester," she argues.
you start to chip your nail polish on your free hand, holding your phone to your ear with the other one. "what's up?" you ask.
"come out with me tonight? please. you've hardly come out this semester and let's be real, once finals start there's no chance i'll be able to convince you to come out," your friend pleads. her desperation is heavy and you rub at your eyes.
you want to immediately tell her no, but you really hadn't seen her in awhile yet the other day you skipped class for a chance to hangout with someone you hardly even knew. granted, it was ellie, but still.
a pit of guilt planted itself in your stomach, forcing your next words.
"what time?"
yelping in excitment, the girl on the other end of the line gushes out all of the information to you. "i'll pick you up around eleven, okay?"
a rushed end to a quick call, with promises to text more and texting outfit options for the night.
you were nervous about the change of pace. it caused you a strange feeling of obligation, to get out of your bubble and do something different every once in awhile. during college, people were promised four years of finding their forever friends and partying, making the memories that will last their entire lifetime.
you tried to partake, but it felt forced.
with a demanding major and even more demanding coursework, it was hard to maintain friendships by finding the time to actually go out. any spare time you had was replaced with shifts at work.
you felt like you were doing college… wrong.
your music resumed, the volume increasing to drown out any anxious thoughts that would prompt you to cancel last minute.
with no new texts from ellie, you decided to give your study guide one last try.
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by the time you were supposed to get picked up, you were already yawning. you had dedicated the last hour to getting ready and picking an outfit that was deemed cute enough to make you feel good but still comfortable enough that you felt secure.
though it felt like a sleepy time of year, students were nearly restless. the pressures of exams were relieved on weekends, places around the college town open all night for people to blow off steam.
it happened quickly so you didn't have a moment to reconsider or backtrack, a text of 'here!' and shoving your feet into shoes before dashing to meet your friend in the parking lot.
the car ride was a catch up session, your friend talking about her new friends but you made a quick decision not to tell her about ellie. you weren't exactly sure why, but it was almost like you wanted to keep ellie to yourself. you checked your phone mindlessly and couldn't help but feel let down when nothing new presented on your screen.
the streets were alive and busy, girls huddled together to stay warm despite the lack of coats. the outside was an indication of how busy each bar and club would be, warm with heat and bodies packed inside.
you arrived at your friend's favorite establishment, the environment a stark difference from the comfortable evening you were having in your dorm just a few short hours ago. you pressed your way through a thick crowd, hanging loosely onto the arm of your friend so you wouldn't split up.
drinks were overpriced but you ordered one anyway, something to hold onto but you knew you would probably only finish a little more than half of it if you were dedicated enough.
"i'm gonna meet up with some people, my friends and their friends," your friend explained over the music, quickly resulting in your growing concern.
you wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt, you always did, but other people getting involved meant you would be inevitably ditched within the hour. the look on your face gave away your feeling and the girl standing opposite of you had a short patience.
"i wish you would've told me," you tried to reason, not wanting to look or sound pathetic.
"it doesn't matter," she shook her head. "they're nice, it'll be fun."
fun.
'fun' ended up being the act of standing awkwardly in the back because they wouldn't make enough room for you in the circle. 'fun' apparently was listening to them tell the same story over and over, yet talk over you every time you tried to speak too.
forced to be a wallflower, you stood with your back against the wall as you observed other people dancing. you could almost be content like this... the music was loud and the lighting was dark. the combination seemed like it would be an anxiety nightmare, but it was actually the opposite. you could stand there, completely unnoticed, hidden by the atmosphere.
you really could've been okay with it, until your eyes were drawn to your friend pointing at you. you stood up straight, thinking she was beckoning over, until you realized exactly what she was doing. she had been dancing with a guy that night, and that guy seemingly had a friend. she was pointing you out to the friend, pushing him to join you. he started walking in your direction and your stomach filled with dread. you didn't want to be in this situation, and you certainly didn't want to make small talk with some guy.
you tried to look busy, quickly pulling out your phone and looking anywhere else. against your silent praying, the guy stood over you.
"hey," he said, leaning too close to your ear and you ducked your head away. he smelled like alcohol and cologne that was sprayed too many times. you tried a polite smile but it came out like a wince.
"can i buy you a drink?"
you answered his question by holding up your cup, hand tightly covering the opening of the top. you had only taken a few sips of it, not able to stand the taste.
"how many?" he pressed, pointing to your cup.
"what?" your face scrunched in confusion.
"how many drinks have you had?" he clarified with a laugh that you didn't return.
"one. this is my first," you informed him flatly.
he made a face like he was pretending to be let down and your stomach turned. "only one? come on girl, you need more than that."
you outwardly groaned, rolling your eyes as you pushed yourself off of the wall. "i'm going to the bathroom. bye."
"want me to hold your drink?" he called after you, agitated and loud.
you ignored him and stepped carefully through the crowd, not wanting to stand too closely to any men or accidently bump any dancing girls. you were hyper focused on the restroom sign and the way the music pounded in your ears, muttering to yourself when you felt a hand wrap around your arm.
you immediately tensed, your blood running cold but your body feeling hot simultaneously. was this guy seriously grabbing you right now?
short tempered and fuming, you loudly spat "fuck off," as you angrily whipped around, only to be met with horrified green eyes, freckles, and auburn hair.
letting go as quickly as she had reached for you, ellie dropped her hand. "shit, sorry, i-"
you quickly cut her off, apologizing profusely.
"ellie, oh my god, i am so sorry," you stressed, heart sinking when she took a step away from you.
"sorry, i really shouldn't have done that," ellie mumbled, wincing. you nearly didn't hear her, the music was too loud.
she had on a loose flannel, unbuttoned down the middle and her converse. you were sure that her horrified expression matched your own, and you wanted nothing more than to sink into the floor.
"i'm so sorry," you repeated. "i thought you were someone else and-"
"i'm sorry, i called your name but-"
you kept talking over each other, rushing awkward apologies. ellie shifted on her feet, her cheeks red.
"sorry," you mentioned again, defeated. "there was this guy, and..."
"a guy," ellie repeated quietly, her expression unreadable.
"yeah," you pushed on, glancing over ellie's shoulder. he was watching you now, remaining where you left him. gross. "i was trying to get away from him and i didn't hear you, i had no idea, i'm so sorry ellie."
she laughed dryly as she recovered but your face still stung with embarrassment. "it's alright," ellie reassured you, turning her head to briefly spot the guy you had glanced at. "are you here with him?" she asked curiously.
you quickly shook your head, rolling your eyes to express your disgust. "no," you emphasized. "i'm here with my friend but... i don't know," you laughed bitterly, finally taking a moment to let it sink in that you had ran into ellie here.
"i don't know why i'm here," you felt the need to say.
ellie nodded with a short laugh. "tell me about it."
you raised an eyebrow but didn't press it, still feeling like you needed to collect yourself. you could stand and talk with ellie forever, but you seriously needed to regroup.
"hey, um, i'm gonna run to the bathroom," you explained.
"come find me when you're done?" ellie offered, green eyes scanning your face. she pointed to an area by the bar, showing you where you could find her.
your nerves didn't stand a chance, overpowered by the overwhelming desire to be close to her. you nodded, your smile genuine for the first time that night.
before you could return on your path to the bathroom, ellie spoke again. "do you want me to hold onto that for you?" she offered, gesturing to the drink in your hand.
"oh, yeah, thanks ellie." you passed it over and she covered the top with her hand automatically, a simple thing that made your heart swell.
"i'll be there, alright?" she guaranteed, her eyes never leaving yours. you nodded once and parted ways, quickly heading to the bathroom.
you dashed for an empty sink, running cold water over your hands as you stared at your reflection. you couldn't figure out why, but you felt weird about running into ellie here. you suddenly wondered who she was here with, or was she here alone?
pushing out a deep breath, you turned off the water and dried them with a paper towel. you felt dizzy, like you were in a state in between sleeping and being awake.
"this," you mumbled to your reflection, "this is why you don't go out."
once you had worked up the courage, you emerged from the bathroom and scanned your surroundings. the girl you came with was dancing with the guys and her friends. feeling secure in the fact that you wouldn't be missed, you went to look for ellie but you didn't have to search for long.
ellie was exactly where she had said she would be, leaning against the bar with her hand protectively covering your drink. she seemed to be keeping an eye out for you because when your eyes locked, she waved you over.
you didn't bother to try and contain your grin as you made your way over, but your confidence was short lived when a pretty girl with dark hair leaned over, talking in ellie's ear.
oh.
whatever the girl said had made ellie laugh, and you faltered in your step. of course she was here with someone. of course she had other friends, (a girlfriend?) other people that she actively talked to and hung out with. you would've been stupid for thinking otherwise, you just hadn't thought about it much.
you didn't want to interrupt, but ellie caught your eye again. she raised her eyebrows, curiously, waiting. taking a deep breath, you pressed on, slowly coming to her side.
ellie handed your cup over and you accepted, taking a drink for courage.
"welcome back," ellie mused, a small smile gracing her lips.
you glanced at the girl standing on the other side of ellie, the liquid in her cup a vibrant color. ellie followed your eyes and made a face of realization, pulling the girl into the conversation.
almost sounding sheepish, she introduced her. "this is my friend dina, and... jesse," ellie craned her neck around but 'jesse' was elsewhere. you nodded anyway, smiling in dina's direction.
"hi, it's nice to meet you," you said, genuinely, despite your heart pounding in your chest.
"likewise! i've heard so much about you," dina replied, eyes bright and smiling.
ellie's eyes widened and your eyebrows shot up, taken aback by dina's introduction. you glanced at ellie but she was already composed.
"really?" you asked, truly surprised.
dina laughed and changed the subject. "jesse complains about coming but yet it's impossible to keep an eye on him," she expresses in response. "it was so nice meeting you," dina smiles at you once more and quickly squeezes ellie's shoulder before disappearing, presumably to find 'jesse.'
you take another drink and ellie clears her throat, music filling the silence. "where's your friend?" ellie questions.
you hum thoughtfully and scan the faces of all of the dancing people until your eyes land on her group. "there," you nod in their direction, trying not to sound bitter.
"are they all your friends? do you want me to go meet them?" ellie asks, watching them for a moment before gazing at you, eyes flickering over your face.
"no," you reply quickly, flatly.
"okay then," ellie laughs, tilting her head to peer at your expression. she brushes a strand of hair out of her face and it's hard not to watch, to not be entranced by every slight movement and expression she makes.
once again, you're thankful for the lighting, or lack thereof, and for the music. for some reason it feels like less pressure, which you appreciate.
"oh god," ellie mumbles, drawing your attention. she wraps her tattooed arm around your waist, gently pulling you closer to her side. your breath hitches and you tense up, but her arm is then back by her side, the ghost of her touch electrocuting your senses. "watch out," she says, nodding to an older man making his way to the bar.
your eyebrows draw together in confusion as ellie watches the man in disgust, but you're more focused on the fact that her arm was just around you for about three seconds.
you take a slow drink, watching as the man leans down to talk to several girls crowded around the bar. it seems nearly harmless though a little odd, he's definitely the oldest person in the room as everyone else is college aged. you turn to ellie, confused, but she nudges your arm to keep watching.
he puts his arms around the girls, his hands going way too low, signaling the bartender to give them drinks with a flick of his hand.
you face ellie, eyes wide and mouth agape. she nods in disgust, but slightly amused at your expression.
"he's the owner," she explains. "he's so gross... people flirt with him because if he likes you, you're set with free drinks. he's just... gross."
"why are you here?" you question, frowning.
"dina likes to dance," ellie says simply.
"and you?"
"no," ellie laughs quickly.
"i definitely wasn't expecting to run into you here," you admit, running your finger along the rim of your plastic cup.
"yeah? i wasn't expecting you either." ellie watches you carefully, thoughtful in expression but casual in demeanor.
"excuse me ladies," a gruff voice cuts through. you snap your head up and meet the eyes of the owner, chewing your bottom lip nervously as his eyes drag across you and ellie. he contemplates ellie for a moment before setting his gaze on you, frowning.
"aren't you warm in that, sweetheart?" he slurs out, indicating to the sweater you're wearing. ellie places a gentle hand on your shoulder, making a face at the man from over your shoulder.
"i'm just fine," you remark.
he doesn't like your answer, but you didn't say anything rude so he can't lecture you. he stares at you, unmoving, and decides to give you one last chance.
"what're you drinking there?" he questions, shuffling closer to get a better look. he makes like he's expecting you to bat your eyelashes at him, and ellie tugs you backwards into her.
"let's go dance," she murmurs into your ear. your face gets hot and her hands are on your shoulders, walking behind you and guiding you away from the bar. you leave your drink on the counter, unwanted.
once you're far enough away, she gently halts you to a stop. your skin is burning from the contact and you turn to face her, trying to be lighthearted. "i thought you don't like to dance?"
the corners of her mouth turn up and you give in, absolutely folding in her presence. you leave about a foot of space in between your bodies, but loosely and awkwardly wrap your arms around her shoulders. it makes ellie nervously laugh, and she hesitates before carefully placing her hands at your waist. it's your turn to laugh now, fully aware of how ridiculous you must look. you obnoxiously sway to the side, putting your weight onto one foot and then the other, threatening to make each other fall over with the abrupt movements. it's a stark contrast to the way everyone else is moving to the music, but you're both genuinely laughing so you leave it be.
you can see your previous group in the corner of your eye and nerves wash over you again, feeling shy at ellie's playful touch. suddenly you feel guilty for harboring a secret crush on the girl, feeling as if you've crossed some sort of boundary. you steady yourself but it's hard to breathe with ellie so close, staring at your eyes and your lips and your eyes again... or did you imagine it? obviously not, but certainly you're reading into it? making something out of nothing?
ellie coughs, flustered. you both stop 'dancing,' dropping your arms and facing each other straight on.
"hey," you say, your face scrunching in confusion, "i thought you were working on the study guide tonight."
your comment makes ellie recover and she breathes out a laugh in surprise, even though you were being serious.
"i thought you were working on the study guide tonight."
you frown and ellie rolls her eyes, shaking her head at you in pretend disappointment. "work on it with me tomorrow then," she tells you, nearly surprising herself with how quickly it came out.
her voice is like honey, making it impossible to pull away from her, even mentally.
"really?" you eye her suspiciously.
she nods and shrugs, and you promise to think it over. standing this close to ellie felt dangerous to the small amount of confidence you tried to build up. she smelled almost earthy, a warm deep scent, maybe a touch of vanilla and... weed?
a hand brushed your waist but it wasn't ellie's, the body stepping into view. the guy from earlier that your friend had sent over came around to stand next to ellie, his eyelids heavy.
"what the fuck, dude?" ellie questioned sharply.
"i was watching you dance," he mused, glancing at you and then ellie. it was hardly even dancing, you were just making each other laugh, so your skin crawled with the idea of that guy watching with ill intent.
"okay, go watch someone else," ellie shot back, her tongue sharp.
you glanced around, catching sight of your friend from earlier. she was watching the interaction, as if it were encouraged, and gave you a thumbs up. you exhaled in disbelief, turning your attention back to ellie. she was staring the guy down, brows furrowed.
"you ladies wanna dance with me or what?" he was cocky, drunk, and standing way too close.
"fuck off," ellie spat, a lot like how you did earlier when you thought that he was the one who grabbed your arm.
he stood in disbelief, unmoving, so you grabbed ellie's hand and dragged her away.
"they should be banned from public places," you grumble. ellie snorts, features immediately softening as she turns to you.
"this is ridiculous. do you wanna get out of here?"
at her proposition, your heart leaps. you definitely do, but the idea terrifies you nonetheless. despite yourself, you automatically nod.
"let me go find dina and jesse, see if they're gonna leave or stick around longer. wanna come with?"
you almost say yes but shake your head instead. "i should go tell the person i came with that i'm leaving, just in case."
ellie nods in understanding. she starts to turn away but stops short, eyes boring into your own. "meet me right by the entrance, okay? i'll be quick."
it's your turn to signal your understanding now, and you head back through the crowd to find your... friend. it's pretty easy to spot her but not to gain her attention.
"hey. hey, i'm gonna go, alright?"
she whips around at you, confused. "you're leaving?"
"yeah."
"are you gonna be safe?"
despite being ignored and ambushed with a creepy guy, you smile at her concern. it's the bare minimum, really, but it's appreciated.
"yeah," you repeat. "it's... a friend from class. she's good. safe," you express.
you say your goodbyes and head straight for the doors like you agreed with ellie. you’re only waiting alone for a moment before she joins you, car keys in hand. dina and jesse aren’t following, and instantly you feel like an idiot.
“oh my god, ellie, i totally sabotaged your night.”
“what? no you didn’t,” ellie disagrees.
you push through the doors together, greeted by harsh winds. the cold evening air was shocking as it hit your face, self doubt washing over you.
"you were just trying to have a fun night with your friends and i... i'm such an idiot," you mutter.
"whoa, hey, you're alright," ellie presses softly. she stops walking to look at you, but looks as though she has to work up the courage before she continues speaking. "i'm glad you here were, alright? dina and jesse are fine."
your face is burning and she hesitates again, but the worry expressed on your face causes ellie to continue on.
"honestly i was getting ready to leave before i saw you," she admits, looking in any direction away from you.
you beg and plead with yourself not to read into it, but why did she hesitate? why would you be nervous to tell that to someone who's just a friend? are you reading too much into it, or are you friendzoning yourself?
"ellie," you breathe, and she finally brings her attention back to you. the wind howls through the night, whipping your hair across your cheeks. your heart beats quicker but ellie grows reserved, adjusting her weight on her feet.
"i'll drive you to your dorm," she tells you as she beings walking once more. you quickly follow behind, in a trance of wondering and wanting.
it felt different from before, different from sitting next to her in class and different from studying together. what was usually light hearted jokes and easy conversation was replaced by a thick cloud of nerves, a tension that conjured itself out of nowhere and you desperately wanted to crack a joke but you felt shy.
you were texting a lot lately, you had some serious late night conversations about your families, stressors, lives, anything to get to know each other but this was different. ellie seemed almost solemn now, guarded, and you were worried that you had gotten too comfortable too quickly.
you worried as you walked to the car and you worried as she drove. ellie did exactly as she said she would and you arrived safely to your building, but your feet were glued to the ground as you reached the door and you desperately wanted to selfishly stay with her, just a little longer.
"thanks for pretty much saving me tonight," you stated earnestly. "it sucked before you found me, i'm glad you did."
ellie's smile was crooked and sincere and a wave of relief washed over you. "see you tomorrow?" she asked, her eyebrows drawing up to her forehead.
"the study guide will be completed," you affirm, grinning back at the auburn haired girl.
you heave open the door to your building and ellie steps back to the car, but you call after her one final time. "text me when you're home safe," you urge her, and you can't see the smile that graces her face.
"i will," ellie promises, and she did.
after cleaning up you fall into bed, exhausted, but your mind is racing. you turn to your side, facing the wall that is decorated with two sticky notes. you lightly trace ellie's drawings with your finger, willing yourself to go to sleep so you won't be absolutely miserable with a lack of sleep by the morning.
you were seeing her again, tomorrow, and nothing else at that moment mattered.
not your endless piles of homework, or the way you were ditched tonight. not the fact that the weather was getting colder by the day and you still couldn't find your earmuffs, or that one of your finals was going to take place at 7am.
nothing else mattered... just ellie.
[ part five ]
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king-krisu · 4 months
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Kinda cringe to do this so late but I've finally had a moment of peace after christmas and I am ALSO feeling soppy and emotional so here goes:
I know every post in this fandom ever has said that this feels so one-of-a-kind and different from any space they've been in before, AND I'M GONNA SAY IT AGAIN! I have never thought of a tag on tumblr as a sort of weird little family where we all exchange ideas and works of art and memes, or ask questions like it's a community notice board. The friends I've made both here and on tiktok mean the world to me, and I'm so grateful we've created such a community here where people are easy to approach and to maybe get to know on a deeper level. Maybe it's the christmas cheer yay but even if we've sometimes disagreed on some stuff, I couldn't care less right now, I've never been part of a more wholesome community than this.
Käärijä, and Jere as a person, has made me so much more confident than ever before, and I've done things I never thought I could bcs of him. I'm so grateful for such a figure like him in our music scene right now, especially a male figure, who doesn't dismiss his queer/female fanbase and does whatever he wants. His message of kindness not only to other people but also to yourself has helped me SO MUCH over this year. I've never talked about this publicly but the night of the ESC finale when I heard people SCREAMING his name, and lyrics in my native language, I started sniffling like a baby from shock. I've never been particularly proud of my roots, but Käärijä has made being and speaking finnish cool, and none of us have ever seen anything like it here.
To all of you who learn our language, take the time to listen to other finnish music, watch finnish media and maybe even visit our country: thank you. We hope it's been fun and even if all of you move on to other esc artists in the next season of it, we are so grateful for this small moment of recognition. Genuinely, we're so happy people appreciate our culture on its own for once <3 we won't ever forget this.
I hope you've all enjoyed my stupid little translation videos/posts, and that they've been helpful/entertaining in any way lol. I'll admit that ever since I made deeper friendships here I haven't been as active, so if I ever miss an anon please just ask again and i'll get to it! I can't wait to meet some of you who are coming here next summer to see Jere, hopefully by then he's seen sense and hired me as an in-house interpretor for all you fäns from ader kantri. And even if you can't travel here or to any of his other shows: i love you all so much <3
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jinxxedmisery · 2 months
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God... WHY!? (NSFW)
Headcanons plus a short fic.
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Warnings: NSFW content.. this is literally a scenario about Gojo being a goofball during the deed...
Anywho... enjoy...Hope you like dead memes and cringe... (I hate myself for writing this... This should be a war crime)
Generally Gojo enjoys bringing humor into the bedroom, he really loves seeing you laugh.
But sometimes... He can get so fucking annoying.
As you lay on your back, hands pinned down to the bed, Gojo on top of you, thrusting into you in just the right way to make you scream...
A song you know all too well comes on... He's played it during sex so often. After that damned reddit r/AITA post he will not stop.
You've begged him to delete it from your Spotify playlist, but he never did.
Nasty little shit likes to see you go from whining about wanting him deeper to whining wanting him to stop acting like an idiot
Ofc.. He likes calling you really stupid pet names as well.. in and out of the bedroom..
And you better believe he thrusts with the rhythm of the song playing.. not the beat... Like a psychopath.
"Satoru....." you whine. A smirk appears on his lips as he continues the eratic thrust pattern.
"Hmmm? what is it munchkin?" He says with a mischievous glint in his eyes. You roll your eyes
"Please... for fuck sake turn that shit off... and wait... 'Munchkin' did you just call me 'Munchkin'?" You resist the urge to push him off of you and onto the floor
"Aww does my little boo thang not like what I call them?" You narrow your eyes at him
"Do you want me to shrivel up and die down there?" He rests his head on your shoulder and you feel him grin against your skin, you gulp in response fearing what would come next.
"Oh pookiebear~ You'll be okay won't you? You still want my girthy meat stick right?" he whispers in your ear, you hate to admit it but it could almost be hot... If he weren't whispering the most deranged shit into your ears. "You love it when my hotdog is inside your moist cavern don't you?"He whispers making you cringe. "And when my hands move to touch your sensitive nubbins" He says, moving his hand over to your chest, teasing your nipples. "How about I purple your nurple, would you like that my candybear.. the jelly to my peanut butter~"
"Satoru.... I hate you so much right now" You complain, He evidently takes pleasure in your cringing as he chuckles leaning in to kiss you. His thrusts once again moving to a pleasurable rhythm. No matter how much you groan and act like you hated him for it, you still truly love him. And that included all of his bedroom antics. In fact, you appreciate it sometimes, he always knows how to make you laugh and well today was indeed one of those days.
Just as you were soaking in the serious affection he was finally giving you after his goofiness.
Two Trucks came on. And he began bobbing his head and syncing his thrusts to the music. You scream in exasperation. "SATORU GOJO I SWEAR TO SHIT I'M NEVER LETTING YOU TOUCH SPOTIFY EVER AGAIN!!!"
He slept on the couch that night.. As he should.
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kairiscorner · 8 months
Note
reader creating silly miguel emojis and sending them tk the spider society gc for everyone to use bc shes a fun gal ;p (and she likes annoying him too)
fr. (did i legit make a whole ass dc server for this? yes.) sorry i didn't change my display name to y/n, i got lazy 😭😭😭 also written ver with additional scenes under the cut !!
(reblogs are greatly appreciated, it helps get my content out there! if you guys like what you see, please reblog it too <:D)
shitting on miggy cutely. 🫶— miguel o'hara x reader
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✧ written version !! ✧
after lyla had signed miguel up for a discord account, much to his frustration, you immediately got a hold of his username (which was really generic, he named himself: 'miguelohara' at first, but lyla changed it up to: 'migolohellnawh') and added him to the spider society's discord server. you made a channel that was dedicated to showing miguel all the stickers and emojis you and the society had made that was just full of memes of miguel. thanks to earth-928's social media, you were all fed with silly stickers and emojis of him for days; you all had a spam channel where hobie and pav would have contests to see whose thumbs could spam more miguel shitpost memes, but that would be a story for another day.
as miguel got notified that he was added to a server, the first thing that caught his eye was the vulgarly named channel of the server: "shitting on miggy". he brought his eyebrows together and tapped on the bold text of the channel's name. he asked what that channel was for, pointing out the name in a disappointed manner as he typed. lyla giggled under her breath as she watched miguel try to act intimidating and angry over text, but his scrunched up face crinkled even more as he saw that the first thing you sent him was a sticker of his stern, stoic face that had the words: "this ugly son of a bitch is fucking super hot chicks and basically you are fucking stupid. how? ...just watch the free video."
miguel had clicked the sticker, and he saw the file name: "singlehotmominyourarea". he huffed as he texted you, asking you what that was that you sent, because he thought it was an actual link to something. he took his reading glasses and, when he could make out what it said, he got angrier than he already was earlier. he told you what you sent was not at all funny, and when you replied that—no, it certainly wasn't... it was very hysterical, though—you sent him a very pink and cutesy sticker of him with cat ears. miguel groaned as lyla took a hundred screenshots remotely from his phone. "where are you even getting these?" he asked you as you kept sending him more shitpost stickers.
"but i don't even like horses." miguel muttered as he saw the "save a horse, ride a cowboy" sticker you sent. "yeah, you're scared of them." lyla reminded him as he rolled his eyes. "no need to remind me." he said as he typed out that he 'hated' (didn't fear, there's a difference, and that is that miguel is fucking lying, he is scared of horses) horses. but of course, you knew his secret, and miguel pounded his fist against the arm of his computer chair. "are you seriously telling them on your end?" he asked lyla as she stuck her tongue out and shrugged, looking all smug as miguel grumbled and told you that he didn't ask for your correction, only for you to send an emoji of your favorite girl dinner: his five course meal ass on display.
"yeah, you need ass correction 'bee cee' this bakery is packed; what...?" he read aloud as lyla groaned. "get with the times, old man." "we don't say stuff like that in 2099 anymore, don't tell me to get with the times." he told his AI assistant as he looked through the emoji catalogue you guys had, and among them all, a colorful one stood out to him and he sent it—hoping you could tell him what was on the emoji, but knowing you, you'd of course mess with him again. you told him the emoji, which was promptly named: "doublecheekedup", meant the very sticker you sent him in response. it was similar to the cat-eared one, but it read: "i <3 my girlfriend", with miguel's angry face in the heart.
miguel looked at it all confused and pulled his reading glasses away from his face and back on to see if he was reading this right. he asked you if he was supposed to be flattered about your sticker, with him immediately following up with his honest opinion; that it was irritating instead of flattering to him. you told him the sticker was more 'sexy' than it was irritating or flattering, and you soon sent him another sticker, where he was diving face first with his legs spread and bottom out. miguel looked at it all baffled and flustered, where were you getting these photos...?
you asked him who he was spreading for, asking if it was you, while sending him an emoji with his back turned to the camera and his ginormous bottom in full view. miguel couldn't make out the text in the emoji and told you the text was too minute for him to read it. he also cleared up that he wasn't intentionally spreading his cheeks for anyone, he had just 'stumbled'. "sure ya did." lyla said as she appeared over miguel's shoulder with a smug grin on her face. "i really didn't, though." miguel said as lyla nodded slowly, her smug grin not leaving her face as miguel saw your next message. "because you wanted to spread your asscheeks for me, i didn't spread for anybody!" he screamed aloud in the confines of his office, pounding his fist on the arm of his computer chair as you sent the girl dinner emoji that was the very profile picture of the spider society's discord server.
miguel was heated in the face and heaving... oh, was there some unspoken feelings he was hiding about your little provocative words? maybe... he might sound like he wants out of the server immediately, but deep in his heart, he'd stay; even if you'd annoy the shit out of him with those damned emojis and stickers. they were irritating, yes, and maybe just the tiniest bit flattering in a twisted way for him. "wow, you're a masochist." lyla pointed out as miguel mumbled for her to shut up, but she was right as always.
tags !! @miguelswifey04 @binibinileonara @simsrandomstuff @luvstarrstruck @popeheywardssecretgf @meeom @arachnoia @melovetitties @ophanimgold @hisachuu @wreakingmarveloushavok
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theragethatisdesire · 10 months
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much ado about nothing chapter 5 - plug!eren x reader - 18+!!!
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DISCLAIMER: this post contains MATURE CONTENT that is intended only for those over 18. minors and ageless blogs, please do not read below the cut.
i have successfully kicked my writer's block to the curb and am ready to pick back up on plug!eren!!!! woohoo!! this is the part of the story where it gets really plot heavy and there's a lot of moving parts, so it's been a fun exercise to write and brainstorm. if anything is confusing or u have any theories/questions PLEASE hit my inbox i'm so down bad for plug eren i could talk about him for days.
get ready to meet a new character who is......not the best lol. this is also the first chapter written in eren's pov :o things are about to get interesting!
still haven't caught up? series masterlist HERE <3
specific cws: mentions of smut but nothing outright, alcohol use, swearing, u know the drill
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“If music be the food of love, play on. / Give me excess of it, that, surfeiting, / The appetite may sicken and so die.” - Twelfth Night by William Shakespeare (Act I, Scene 1)
Eren is, admittedly, a romantic person, especially given his occupation. Not romantic in the cheesy, buying-flowers and kissing-in-the-rain sense, but he appreciates the little details of life. He loves autumn, when the leaves catch on fire with the changing of the season. He loves the little crook of a woman’s neck, that slope where it goes from tendon to shoulder to collarbone. He can appreciate a good bourbon; after years of raiding his dad’s stash, he developed a palate for it early on. Eren’s romantic nature leads him to believe in signs. When the universe tells him something, he listens.
The text still sat in his inbox unopened, marinating in its own bizarre, heartbreaking nature.
> heyyyy lover boy! i’m back from austria! missed u, let’s catch up ;)
Eren knows that Breeze knows him, knows him well enough to understand that his three-week radio silence isn’t a no, it’s a maybe. He hates himself for not immediately texting her back and telling her to fuck off, but after his conversation with you, he thinks it might be the universe telling him it’s safe this time, that he won’t end up a shell of himself. Maybe.
You had been firm in your assertion that you and Eren were better off as friends, and as much as he wanted to fight it, Eren respects women. As much as he can when he’s prone to wrenching their jaws open and spitting in their mouths while he’s balls deep inside them, at least. He’s disappointed, but he respects it, and if he’s honest, he likes you.
He likes your sharp humor, likes the way you tend to keep your hair up off of your neck, likes the way your eyes light up when someone gives you an excuse to talk about your studies. He hasn’t been “just friends” with a woman in a long time, but it’s refreshing, an excuse to go grab a coffee and shoot the shit like a normal person instead of lurking in the corner of a frat party handing out pills like a perverse ice cream truck.
The last three weeks of “friends” have been the best Eren’s had in a long time. You’re easy, that’s what he likes about you. He can drop the cold mask he wears so often, giggle over a stupid meme, listen intently as you prattle on about some long-dead 18th-century author that was “so ahead of her time!”, smirk when you chastise him for doodling little hearts and flowers all over your coursework.
Sure, he still steals a glance down your shirt when he can, and he’d never admit it, but he thinks about you late at night. He thinks about you when he’s in the shower, when he’s got himself in his hand, panting and swearing under his breath, but he manages to feel enough guilt over it to still consider you a friend. You’re caring and considerate and easy, wholesome fun, unlike someone that’s made a sudden reappearance into his life.
After that first night, just when he was starting to entertain the thought of promoting you from one night stand to official fuck buddy, the closest thing to commitment Eren allows himself to maintain these days, Breeze swept back into his life, and you hit the brakes on him. While it may not have been the sign he wanted to receive, Eren’s a romantic, and he listens to the universe, especially when it goes so far out of its way to tell him something.
He’s decided to let Breeze stew for a little while longer. Campus will be clearing out for Thanksgiving break soon, along with most of his business, and he’s going to wait until his hands are empty of work and you before answering her. Plus, she had flitted off to Europe after college like their entire relationship had been nothing more than a passing phase; Eren’s owed at least a little bit of pettiness, right?
> paradise ath 1130! see uthere ;)
Eren snorts at your text. Being as uptight as you are about grammar (you’re constantly hounding him about his texting style, and he’s been making them even more incorrect just to hear you berate him), he knows you’re not just texting quickly, you’re drunk.
“Yo, ‘min!” Eren calls into the kitchen, an excited flutter already rising in his chest beneath his hoodie.
“Yeah?” Armin’s head pops around the doorframe, a dab of ketchup on the corner of his mouth.
“Wanna go to Paradise later?”
“The club?” Armin’s nose wrinkles. Connie’s head appears right beside Armin, a wide grin splitting his face.
“Oh, hell yeah,” Connie answers for both of them before Armin has the chance to shoot the idea down, “who’s going?”
“Like you don’t know the answer to that,” Armin scoffs, ducking back into the kitchen with a roll of his eyes.
“I never took her for a ‘club’ type of girl,” Connie adds air-quotes to emphasize his confusion.
Eren mulls that over for a moment; he doesn’t really take you for a club type of girl either, but from the sound of it, Historia and Sasha have already done the job of getting you good and drunk and talking you into a night on the town. Eren’s always wanted to see what you’re like when you’re well and truly fucked up; every time you indulge him with a story from college, he ends up laughing so hard he’s clutching his stomach and gasping for breath.
Supposedly, when you go all out, you drop the mom-friend act and become a little less tame; is this Eren’s opportunity to get an eyeful for himself? He’s not waiting around to find out.
Eren shrugs. “Come help me make these runs and we’ll go. Armin, you’re driving.”
The drop-offs are uneventful, and as soon as Eren steps foot inside the club, his nose scrunches with distaste. Ironically, he’s never been into the partying scene, much preferring a quiet beer at Scout’s or a blunt on the couch to a club. The music’s horribly loud, bass thudding through the fabric of his hoodie and beating against his chest, and as he looks for you, he can barely see through the mass of bodies and the fog machines. You’re here? It’s difficult for Eren to imagine you, in your favorite flannel and those cute little Vans he likes, tucked against the bar throwing back your signature craft beer. As Connie urges him and Armin in the direction of the bar, calling for green tea shots, Eren nearly regrets his decision, until fingernails dig into his shoulder, spinning him on his heels.
“Hey, you.”
Eren blinks stupidly as you grin up at him through thick, black lashes. He’s never even dared to imagine you like you are now, piercing eyes gazing up at him through a heavy dusting of makeup and the shortest, tightest dress Eren’s ever seen hugging every inch of your curves. You look sinful in a way he’s never seen you before, not even when he was holding you tight to him and wrenching out orgasm after orgasm from your body. He gulps.
“Holy shit– hey,” he lets you pull him in for an overexcited hug, bites down on the inside of his cheek to distract himself from the bulge already swelling in his pants.
“I missed you!” You pinch his cheeks, much to Eren’s dismay.
“Just saw you yesterday– quit pinchin’ me. What are you even doing here? Didn’t think this was your scene.” Eren has to actively keep his eyes trained on your face; there’s a little bead of sweat traveling down the expanse of skin between your breasts that’s making his mouth water. Friends, he scoffs in his mind. Are you trying to kill him?
“Well, it’s not, but Sasha says I need to be more fun, and Stor says I need to find a boyfriend.” You gesture around like it’s obvious. Eren cocks an eyebrow, ignoring the inappropriate envy that twists in his stomach at the mention of the word ‘boyfriend’.
Boyfriends never like the guy friends, it’s practically a law of nature. If you’re dating around, it’s only a matter of time before some square in a button-down steals you away from your coffee dates and movie nights with Eren, but he can’t get too caught up in that now, not when you’re looking up at him all dizzy and sexy and bursting at the seams.
“Don’t know if this is the place for that.”
“That’s what I said!” Oh, you’re drunk drunk, all of your movements overexaggerated and shaky. It makes him want to laugh seeing you like this; his little book nerd, trashed and mere inches away from having her ass out at a club. Well, either laugh or drag you into the bathroom to bend you over the sink. He can’t be sure.
“Hey mama!” Connie shouts over at you, handing you a shot. Eren has half a mind to snatch it out of his hand after catching the slurring in your voice, but he’s too late; you throw it back without so much as a shudder, grinning all wide and wet and pretty when you swallow.
“I didn’t think you’d actually show up,” you tell him, pulling him down by his collar so you can speak into his ear. Eren has to bite back a groan at the feel of your hot lips against his ear. Friends, he reminds himself urgently, pushing you back from him but keeping his hands firm on your hips, relishing in the way your flesh gives under his grip.
“You know the rules. You call, I come.”
“That’s what she said,” you snicker, pinching his cheek again.
“Cut that out!”
“Make me.” Oh fuck, Eren’s going to die. He’s going to die if you keep looking at him like that, bottom lip tucked between your teeth and fuck-me eyes on him.
“You’re not being very friendly,” he manages to choke out, trying his hardest to give you a suspicious look through the dizzying wave of images that flash through his brain. You with your mouth full of him. You spread out on his bed, back arched and fingers twisted in his hair. The little “o” your mouth made when you rode him for the first time. Eren wants to smack himself, jump in a cold shower, something. Get a grip, dude.
“Maybe not,” you shrug, eyes darting over to the bar. “Hurry up and grab a drink, I wanna dance.”
“Not much of a dancer,” Eren admits, taking the beer that Connie hands him.
“Don’t worry, I’ll do all the work.”
Eren isn’t sure if he likes or loves the sound of that, powerless against that stupid little dress you’ve got on as you drag him behind you to the mass of bodies he had so disdainfully eyed on his way in. He’s greeted by a loud round of shrieking, one more pinch to the cheek by Historia and a slap on the ass from Sasha. You make a show of teasing him for how pink his face gets, but luckily, your friends are instantly distracted by Armin and Connie’s arrival right behind him. You pull him back down, glossy lips pressed right against his ear.
“I really like this song.” You’re barely audible over the pounding music, but even if Eren hadn’t heard what you said, he’d get the gist from the way you grind against his thigh, slow and sensual. Maybe you are actually trying to kill him.
“Yeah?” He’s breathless, irreparably and embarrassingly caught in the little web you’ve woven.
“Yeah.” You’re moving harder against him now, throwing your arms around his neck and grinding your hips into his. Eren’s only thought is to let his hands fly back to your hips, let you use him like a stripper pole to show off.
He can feel eyes on him, not the eyes of friends, but of other men around him, wondering who the lucky asshole is that’s getting the royal treatment from a girl as hot as you. If he were to be truthful, it’s getting him off, how every eye is on you and, by proxy, him, holding you like a lifeline as you let the beat rock through your body.
So this, this is the party girl you claim to have living deep inside you. This seductive, electric creature moving tantalizing against his body, this is the source of the stories Historia tells him that make you blush? How you could ever be embarrassed of this is beyond him; you’re like a little devil, sent straight from hell just to torture him, and Eren’s mouth is watering.
Song after song goes by, and you don’t let up, don’t let him catch his breath for a moment, moving from facing him to pressing your ass into his crotch and then back again, arms above your head or wrapped around his neck. Eren wishes he was mentally sound enough at the moment to feel ashamed that you can absolutely feel how hard he is through his pants right now, but he’s drunk on you, letting you press into him so insistently he has to tug your dress down for you, letting you drive him so crazy that he’s grateful for the loud music now. He’d die if Connie or Armin could hear the way he’s grunting and groaning low under his breath, powerless underneath you.
Suddenly, as if you haven’t just been riling him up for the last half hour, you back away enough to face him, shaking your empty cup and him and mouthing something that Eren’s still too dizzy to make out.
“Huh?”
“Get me another drink!” you shout over the bass, laughing at him.
Eren nods stupidly, darting away from you before he can grab your jaw, pull your lips to his like he so desperately wants to. Finally out of the throng of bodies, he can feel his head clearing, some semblance of sanity crashing over him. What the fuck has gotten into him? It was just one night, and you’ve kept him at arm’s length ever since, only seeing each other under the guise of coffee, or a beer, or Eren insisting you need to continue your education in the wonders of horror films. You’re drunk, that’s the only explanation; drunk and teasing him like you aren’t going to wake up and throw him right back into the friendzone. He rests both elbows on the bar, shaking his head like he’ll be able to knock some sense into himself if he rattles his brain around a little.
Eren orders your vodka soda and a beer and a shot for himself, something to clear his head and keep his blood pressure manageable. Hopefully, at least.
When he turns around, drinks in hand, that plan flies out the door. There you are, center of the dance floor, hands above your head and hips moving like you’re intentionally trying to make him lose his fucking mind. He tilts his head in interest when a man approaches you, grazes his hands over your hips like he means to start grinding against you. Eren can feel his own hands tightening around the bottle and the plastic cup in his hand, but he holds himself back; he’s got no claim on you, and if you’re willing to entertain the man (who, if you ask Eren, is way below your standards), who is Eren to stop you?
You surprise him in the best way: when the man touches you lightly, you whip around, brows furrowed and a little glitter in your eyes so mean that even Eren nearly flinches. He can’t read your lips in the low light, but he snorts to himself anyway as the man puts his hands up and backs away from you, eyes wide. As if nothing had happened, you spin back on your heel, facing a cackling Sasha with a shrug.
Eren feels a wide, proud smile blooming on his face. As much as he feels an unwarranted protectiveness towards you, he likes watching you get your teeth out and stand up for yourself. Before he can make his way back over to tease you, a voice from his left makes his blood run cold.
“Rennie?!”
Two thin arms are tossed around his neck before Eren can even respond, the familiar scent of vanilla and coconut enveloping him.
“Breeze?” Eren chokes out, too shocked to keep his composure. She pulls away from him and grins, a little diamond glittering from her right canine tooth.
“You didn’t text me back, you tease,” she swats at his chest, snags the vodka soda he’d bought for you right out of his hand, taking a sip. Eren takes the opportunity to swallow hard around the lump in his throat, one last tentative glance towards you before he turns his gaze back to Breeze.
She’s cut her hair, something short and choppy that swings around her ears, and fuck, she’s still just as pretty as he remembers, little freckles on her button nose visible in the darkness of the club.
“Didn’t think you wanted to see me,” Eren shrugs, forcing his face to remain schooled into one of cold apathy. She had left him, like he was nothing to her. He hates her, he realizes, god, he hates her so much it burns in his veins. Breeze cocks her head, frowning.
“Why would you think that?”
“You fucking left me, Breeze, don’t be stupid,” Eren makes a move to steal the drink back from her, but she holds it close enough to her chest that he’d have to practically grope her to take it, and his fingers recoil at the realization.
“Are you double-fisting, or did you buy this for someone special?” She teases, brushing right over Eren’s bristly demeanor. When he doesn’t answer, she raises her eyebrows. “It’s for someone. Well, point her out! Is she cute?”
Breeze turns on her heel, standing on her tiptoes to glance through the crowd. Before he can stop himself, Eren’s grabbing her upper arm, spinning her back to face him with anger blazing in his eyes. When he meets her gaze, her baby blues are alight with mischief, and he knows that no matter which direction he moves, he’s losing whatever little game she has him trapped in. That was the thing about Breeze; Eren was always losing her games.
“Fuck, just…just stop it, Breeze. What are you even doing here?”
“I’m back in town, didn’t you see my text?” Breeze shrugs innocently, sipping your drink.
“Okay, well, welcome back,” Eren deadpans, leaving her question hanging in the air between them. He turns back to the bar to order another cocktail for you, having given up hope of getting the first one back from Breeze, but she’s relentless, has always been that way. She slides up to the bar beside him, smiling demurely up at him.
“I missed you, you know.”
“Wouldn’t have guessed,” Eren scoffs, rolling his eyes. Breeze flinches, but Eren knows her better than that. It’s all an act, it always is.
“I never realized how much I hurt you,” her fingers grazing over his cheek nearly burn with how cold they are in contrast to the heavy, thick air around them, “‘m sorry, Rennie.”
“It’s fine.” Eren hates the way he twitches and nearly leans into her touch when she swipes her fingers over him. How many times has he thought about this, seeing her again after all these years? Everything he’s planned out, everything he’s ever wanted to say is lodged in his throat, a jumble of letters and words so squished out of order that they no longer hold meaning. He doesn’t love her, not anymore, but his body reacts before his brain can stop it, a conditioned response.
“Can we talk about it soon? Maybe over coffee?” Blue eyes blinking up at him earnestly.
“There’s nothing to talk about, Breeze,” Eren rolls his eyes, swallowing thick around the knot in his throat.
“There is,” she insists, “I brought this amazing espresso blend back with me from Florence, and–”
“If I say yes, will you leave me alone for tonight?” Eren can feel the exasperation in his tone, can feel the weight of his mistake weighing on his shoulders. It’s fine, he tells himself, he’ll make up some excuse and get out of it. A long conversation with Breeze about their breakup is the last thing he needs.
“Maybe,” Breeze tucks her lip in between her teeth, a little smile playing at the corner of her mouth, “unless you change your mind.”
“We can talk or whatever another time, but I’m going back to my friends, okay? Go find yours.”
“You’re my friend,” Breeze purrs, one hand stroking over Eren’s bicep, “and I haven’ seen you int–”
“Don’t push it,” Eren nearly growls, scowling down at her. He knows half of the hatred buzzing through his veins is reserved for himself, but he’ll unpack that at home with a blunt, not in the middle of the club with you waiting for him on the dance floor and Breeze staring up at him hungrily.
“Always wound so tight,” Breeze hums, reaching a hand up to squish his cheeks, “but fine. I’ll see you soon.”
She miraculously leaves him there with nothing but a wink, taking your vodka soda with her; Eren’s shoulders slump in relief. Knowing Breeze, it was a wonder she hadn’t tackled him right there. When he turns around for the second time, two drinks in hand, you’re already staring at him. Shit.
You don’t look mad– and why would you be? You’re friends, Eren reminds himself. There’s no reason for you to know who Breeze is; he’s never told you about her, and he never planned on doing so. Eren knows Historia, though, well enough to believe that she told you everything from the godforsaken moment he walked into your apartment that day. 
He doesn’t like that look you’ve got, though; again, not mad, but he can see the gears turning behind your eyes. Eren has to practically force himself to walk towards you. Your head’s cocked in confusion, something watery and hesitant glimmering in your eyes through the low lighting. If he didn’t know better, he’d say you almost look hurt, but that wouldn’t be fair, would it? You didn’t want him, you had made that abundantly clear.
“Sorry it took me a while. Long line.” Eren hands you your drink, nearly wincing at how naturally the clearly false statement rolls off his tongue.
“Mhm,” you nod, downing nearly half of your drink in one long slurp. Your movements aren’t fluid and dynamic anymore; you’re stiff as a board, bouncing back and forth on the balls of your feet along to the beat of the song. “I…I actually have to pee, do you mind holding this?”
“Now?” Eren blinks, confused. “I just got your drink.”
You offer him a tight smile. “I wanted to wait ‘til you were back, so you could watch my drink. And so you didn’t think I ran off on you or something.”
“Oh, yeah, go ahead.”
He watches you slink away into the crowd, watches the dozens of eyes follow you, surely wondering what happened to the little firecracker in the middle of the dance floor. Eren knows you get like this sometimes, suddenly pensive and nostalgic, knows that per your own admission, you like to handle it yourself. He hadn’t done this to you, had he?
A firm pinch to his cheek distracts him, pulls him down a foot below his normal standing height. Could everyone just stop pinching his fucking face? “Shit, ow!”
“Was that Breeze?” Historia yells directly into his ear. Eren, six-foot-something of hell on wheels, blushes furiously.
“Dude, was that fucking Breeze, or am I too fucked up?” Connie echoes Historia’s sentiment from over her shoulder, eyes comically wide. Armin’s peering around him, eyes flitting back and forth between Eren, Connie, and Historia as he tries to understand what’s happened.
“Who cares?” Eren snaps at Connie. Historia’s grip on his face loosens, releases entirely. If Eren didn’t like the look that you had given him, he hates the look Historia’s shooting at him right now. All daggers and disappointment. She turns on her heel without another word, making a beeline for the bathroom and dragging Sasha along behind her. Eren doesn’t miss Armin’s eyes either; stripping him to the bone without saying a word.
“Quit looking at me like that,” Eren scoffs, waves a hand in Armin’s direction.
“When did Breeze get back into town?” Armin shouts over the music.
“A few weeks ago,” Eren admits, avoiding Armin’s eyes and looking for a spot at the bar where he can escape the heavy gazes of his friends, run away to drown this conversation in a shot of whiskey.
“Did you–”
“I don’t know, man, you know how she is. She just showed up.” Eren knows he’s being unnecessarily gruff, but in his defense, the last hour or so has been a whirlwind of memory and emotion and lust that he doesn’t have the capacity to deal with.
Armin nods simply, takes a sip of his beer. Eren’s known Armin since they were kids, and he knows Armin can read him like a book. If he had a little less pride, Eren would pull Armin to the side and ask if he can make any sense of what’s going through Eren’s head right now because Eren sure as hell can’t. There’s you, with your skimpy dress and your flirty eyes, grinding on him like you’re going to take him home and fuck him stupid again, like you hadn’t demanded an honest-to-god friendship that Eren happens to very much enjoy. On the other hand, there’s Breeze, flighty and just as much of a ghost as she is a real person, popping back into his life and batting her blue eyes at him like she’d never left.
You’re his friend, and Breeze is his terrible ex. There shouldn’t be a choice here– there isn’t, it’s just the way things are, but Eren feels stuck at a crossroads for some reason.
He finally gets fed up with the music and the bumping of bodies around him and storms off to the bar again, biting back the urge to snap at Connie and Armin who he knows are hot on his heels. Eren’s just looked up from the shot of whiskey burning its way down his throat, acknowledging the dizziness that’s come with his drinks for the night, when he spots you.
You don’t look angry, that’s a small mercy you unwittingly grant him, but you’re cowering. Historia, even being shorter than you, is practically pinning you to the wall outside of the bathroom, shouting at you with her finger in your face. Sasha doesn’t look all too pleased either, arms crossed and a deep scowl written into her features. Eren gets a glimpse of your phone in Historia’s other hand that she’s waving around erratically, and wonders what the hell happens in women’s bathrooms. He’s not exactly sure what prompts it, but he checks his own phone. Nothing.
“Are they fighting?” Connie asks, nose scrunched as he peeks around Eren’s arm.
“Looks like it,” Armin nods, wincing as you try to make a grab for your phone from Historia, resulting in Sasha saving you at the last second from face-planting as Historia holds it out of your reach.
“Should we, like, do something?”
“Absolutely not,” Armin and Eren echo each other, looking at Connie as if he’d just suggested they all walk into oncoming traffic.
Eren watches as Historia grabs you by the wrist and drags you out of the bar, your feeble protests doing nothing to stop her insistent steps. Sasha follows both of you, gently pushing you along by the small of your back and shooting a regretful glance at Connie, mouthing a sorry as you all make your exit. It’s hardly been five minutes before Eren’s phone buzzes.
> had to leave. do you mind paying our tab if i venmo you? it’s under reiss.
Eren bites the inside of his cheek again, not worrying in the slightest about covering the tab, but more so the reason for your abrupt exit.
> yeah i got u everything ok?
> thanks a ton! see u next time.
It’s purposefully avoidant, especially coming from Historia, who never misses a chance to make fun of you good-naturedly. If you had been sick in the bathroom or far too drunk to stay, she would have come out and said it. Eren throws his card down, going to pay the hefty tab you and your friends racked up, but not daring to pay his own. After all of the shit that’s just gone down, he owes himself at least one more drink.
Once he’s signed, he pulls out his phone again, thumb hovering over your text thread, then Breeze’s, then yours again. Mindful of Armin’s prying eye over his shoulder, Eren sighs heftily and shuts his phone off, leaning in to order another shot. The following morning’s approaching quickly, whether he wants it to or not, and he’ll save his fucked-up emotions for the daylight.
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solar-wing · 9 months
Text
⚣ BatBro Incorrect Quotes: TikTok 🤳🏻
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⚣⏰ A/N → Literally in the middle of brainstorming and writing the 100-follower Conner Kent fic, and this came to mind. If it's good or not, I'm sorry, I just had to get it out. Thank you for understanding.
⚣⏰ Summary → BatBro has introduced TikTok to the Wayne Family...
REBLOGS and replies are greatly appreciated, please! 💛
⚣ ENJOY 🤳🏻
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BatBro: And if you let that motherfucker Shanon once, best believe they gonna Shenanigan.
Source: Mya Monaco
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Cass: Is Being Gay An Illness?
Cass: Yes, it is. How come every time I kiss a girl, my stomach hurts?
Dick: Those are butterflies.
Cass: Well, they're gay too.
Source: Farha Khalidi
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Stephanie: He is not the love of your life!
Stephanie: He is literally just a guy!!
Stephanie: HIT HIM WITH YOUR CAR!
Source: chrissy
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Damian: Why do you hoes act like if yeen ain't in no relationship, you gon die? Y'all be weak in the knees. Stand up! STAND UP!
Source: Leezy V
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*BatBro with Jason in his weekly therapy session*
Jason: I was silent, ummm...
BatBro👓: Were you silent, or were you silencedSST?
Jason: ...
Jason: The latter.
Source: Beni2.0
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Dick: I'm sorry. Not everybody fits in the bad bitch JAN-RAH. IT'S A JAN-RAH. Not everybody fits on the RAS-STA.
Source: Ms.PressureCooker
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White people chillen in their house:
*Silence*
Black people chillen in their house:
*Silence*
*Beep*
Duke: I don't know why, but I am offended.
*Beep*
Duke:😯
Source: shaelovve
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*Damian chastises his siblings*
Damian: Stop acting like a fucking hooligan! I know your momma raised you in a barn, but around these parts, we have some decorum, okay.
Source: KHAENOTBAE
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Jason: No! Hear me out!
Jason: Why would I write the two essays that I had due 38 minutes ago rather than catch up on my fanfiction?
Jason: A bitch can not be academically sound AND lonely!
Jason: I can't where–I can't wear both of those hats. I'm gonna read a fanfiction in 20,000 words or less by a 15-year-old named Sarah who likes Supernatural. I'm gonna do that.
Source: anania
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*Tim hanging out with BatBro and Conner*
Tim: And I ain't never seen three pretty best friends.
Tim: It's always two of them motherfuckers gotta be gay.
BatBro:*screams*
Conner: cUt ThE cAMeRaS!
Source: reganladd
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*Bruce tells Tim he needs to get more sleep*
Tim: Duh! DUUUUHHH!!! Okay, duuuuuhhh!
Tim: You. Stupid! FUCK!!!
Source: HRH Memes
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Jason: Therapy isn't enough. I need to punch that bitch today. Tomorrow is never promised.
*Walks aggressively towards Bruce's office with Wii Sports fencing music playing*
Source: B. Lee
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*BatBro threatening Conner forgetting the Kryptonian is bigger and stronger than him*
BatBro: How you gon snap my neck off? Bitch, you weigh 95 pounds. I'm 5'8 almost 200 pounds. You can't snap my muthafuckin neck off, bitch. You'll be dead by the time you think about snapping my neck off, bitch.
Source: KB AND KARLA
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BatBro: It is OTOM🍂. *pose✨*
🐦:*squeak*
BatBro: ¡Callate!
BatBro: My husband is cutting the backyard. So I decided to bless him with my company, even though he DOES NOT deserve me.
*walks in Spanish*
BatBro: I HAVE ARRIVED! 👑
*Conner used to these antics but still looking confused*
*BatBro stands in glam while Conner continues mowing the lawn*
BatBro: Good job!
*glam*
BatBro: Yeah, that's enough.
Source: SHIADANNI
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*arguing with BatBro*
Damian: Next time you fucking put your hands on me, I'ma fucking rip off your face, bitch!
Dick: What did he do?
Damian: CAUSE HE FUCKING PUSHED ME...
Source: Nikkibussy084
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☀️ | Bat Family | ☀️
☀️ | Masterlists | ☀️
153 notes · View notes
stick-ball · 5 months
Note
pspspspsp Kevin's trauma and his choice to stay with Thea, why her why not someone else? How does it work considering his characters as whole books/ec , does it make sense or just feel "random"
<Picks you up like a little cat and smooches your head.>
This responce has been sped up by the people who asked Nora on twitter to break Kevin and Thea up, making me see red KillBill style, so:
For me, Kevin's and Thea's relationship makes perfect sense. Maybe it's the realist in me, maybe its the idealist in me, I don't care. When it comes to Kevin's traumas, I think that since most people can't really relate to a majority of them, they get all hung up on the one they most definately can, as in, his mommy issues. When we relate to something, it becomes a really big deal. And here we go! Thea/Kevin suddenly is feared to be toxic instead of being seen for what I think it is: finding love in a hopeless place.
The main issue i see discussed is the disproportion of power at the beginning of the relationship. The main concern is the age difference. I personally don't really get the hate about the age gap between them, because if you read the extra content you will know that while they met when Kevin was 14 and Thea 18, it's not like anything happened between them at that age? First, Kevin saw her as an impressive player, when he did actually see her. That wasn't all that often bcs from what I understand from the EC, Kevin and Riko trained with the Ravens sometimes before they joined the team but a big part of their training happened without them, as well as their life growing up was more detached from the Uni students than people seem to think. And honestly, do you think Tetsuji would just let all the freshmen know they signed into the Yakuza sportsTM? Methinks not, but be delulu if you want I guess. 💋
So anyway, from the EC, it seems like Kevin had a crush slowly build up for Thea over the years, growing from his appreciation of her skill and athletism. Considering how cold that guy is, it probably took him some time to realise, after his irritation at her romances (yeah hello she was dating people her age when Kevin was mooning for here as a pathetic teenage boy, bye bye Thea haters) with other teammates started having nothing to do with the fact it could result in the teams distraction during the game, bcs of their hormones and feelings, and turned to conscious jelousy. And here I have to applaud young Kevin because he did not even realise he was distracted from the game by being jealous. Knowing how oblivious Kevin can be about non exy issues, it likely took quite a while.
So what's next? The "getting together"? Kevin and Thea only started having a sort of physical relationship when Kevin and Riko were already freshmen for Edgar Allan, at 18/19.
Whoever wants to fight me on this being a toxic age gap, what exactly is your angle?
Anyway, Kevin was the one to initiate their relationship, after Riko was done with his distraction from the game and his focus on picking fights with Thea, and told him to sleep with her and get it out of his system. (And that's how i met your mother.) It wasn't much more than that for a long time, because having a relationship on a 12 hrs day/night full of training and uni and juggling two other teams on top of that as well as celebrity status literally sounds like the most insane schedule ever, so it's insane they even managed to talk privately at all.
Now, we circle back to the question, why Thea? Why not someone else? Well, first and fucking foremost, because Nora Sakavic said so. Second of all, because Jung and Freud weren't as stupid as imternet memes would have you believe. (Read their books, read all the books please, i can rec you like a 100 psychology texts, dont be shy)
To keep it short, we do base our attraction on the role models we have, one way or another. I saw enough of my friends pick partners that have the exact character quirks that make them just slightly like an after image of their guardians. Kevin doesn't really have a father model, but his mother? She's always going to be a huge part of his life, is it really so weird and dangerous, that he got infautated with a strong, driven, 4 years older woman, who's incredibly talented and just as determined as him? I don't think so. Is it unhealthy? Is it unsafe? As much as life is, I guess, no one is perfect, but I think he could've done much much worse for himself.
Why did Kevin decide to stay with Thea? I would find it pretty obvious, because she doesn't actually need him. She built herself, but she wants him. Even if she will never have the same fame and recognition in her career that he does. Being wanted this way must be really new for Kevin, who was always a trophy to show off because of his legacy, always a property. But Thea is not competing with him, she doesnt want to own him either. I believe his mother is as much of a role model to her, as to him. So, they have sex, when they want to, they talk - when they feel like it. They don't, well fucking fine, so they don't, they fall in love anyway. It's okay if exy comes first in the beginning, considering both spent a lot of time in cult mentality, I think neither is all that bothered as long as its not obsessive (we could discuss how reasonable it was of Kevin to ghost her for over a year and not tell her about how he broke his hand but thats a whole other essay).
What's really wild to me, is that I think the power imbalance in this relationship is the opposite of what many may think.
Kevin holds all the cards. Thea joined the Ravens as a 18 years old talented athlete, she was one of the only girls on the team, and the Nest was not a place to make friends, on top of that it was a mafia cult. She had everything to prove there, and no way of being prepared for all the grooming. On top of that, she knew nothing of the Moriyamas or even of what actually went down with the whole Perfect Court thing. Kevin knew everything, on top of that, up until he left, he had nothing to prove. He ghosted her, is it so hard to believe she accepted his cold shoulder in this dynamic, in which she obviously is not at the top of the foodchain? He kept secrets from her, is it really so hard to believe she was angry? I think neither of them was ready for neither what life at the nest was like, or for a relationship when it happened, but I also think they are incredibly lucky that they have eachother, their shared passion for exy, their daughter, their dog and friends from the dog park who can't talk about exy to save their lives.
I think Kevin was incredibly lucky for finding Thea, because maybe she did not know everything, maybe it wasn't easy for them, but they understood that Rikos death wasn't a one dimensional victory, that it was just as much of a tragedy for them, for Kevin. I'm happy with the canon and I wish more people appreciated this ship, as its very soothing.
As an ending fun fact, did you know I am the only person to make a playlist for Thea Muldani in all of spotify? Pretty insane if you ask me.
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