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#should this have gone into my journal? maybe
artoodeetootired · 15 hours
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dress
she’s been his best friend since they were pre-teens; he was a rebellious, unrelenting, and aspiring racer, while she was a witty, energetic, and hopeful journalist. but after all these years, she can’t help but question whether they could be more- despite the challenges that come with her feelings.
op!81 x fem!journalist, best friends to lovers (smau)
🥀 “say my name n everythin just stops. i don’t want u like a best friend. only bought this dress so u could take it off…” 🥀
ty for the love on my first smau ! here’s the next per the last poll’s fav choice :) warning: lots & lots of typos/underlying delulu cringe
Twitter
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Instagram
ynuser posted a story 6s
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Liked by landonorris, logansargeant, fbsfuser, and others
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landonorris: solidarity queen ✊🏼
-> ynuser ✊🏼
oscarpiastri: u are actually insane
-> wow this is so nice of you.
-> such a great best friend .
-> an even better journalist.
-> ynuser anything to humble u while i am in this industry 🫶🏻
user: you are UNHINGED
logansargeant: careful yn, your favouritism is showing
-> ynuser: it's part of my contract. im the comedic relief of f1 journalism
-> logansargeant: but doesn't will buxton naturally do that
-> ynuser: now THIS convo could get me fired. shoo logan.
-> logansargeant LOLL
mclaren: just 'cause we love you, we'll let this slide
-> ynuser: 🫶🏻😸
fbsfuser: send my fuck you's to them both :D
-> ynuser: already on it 🫡
iMessages
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Instagram
oscarpiastri
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Tagged: landonorris, mclaren, ynuser
oscarpiastri great start to the season @mclaren 💪🏼
the same can't be said about a particular someone tho... betting someone should get fired.
📸: @ynuser
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landonorris i dont support bullying, but exceptions can be made if it's towards you
ynuser if karma doesn't get u first then either stroll or i will
-> user oh my GOD 💀
-> user shots fired LMAOOOO
-> oscarpiastri i'd rather karma than u and...
mclaren and we thought lando was our only pr liability
-> landonorris wait WHAT
-> oscarpiastri that's a bit too insulting towards me
-> ynuser this doesnt include me.... right?
fbsfuser boy if you don't take this down...
logansargeant oscar is this meant to be retribution for her story earlier?
-> oscarpiastri so what?
-> landonorris that's kinda overdramatic compared to what she posted wow
ynuser i would also like to say that this stanky man tried to go out for dinner right after his race 🤢
-> georgerussell scandalous 😨
-> carlossainz55 not very smooth of you oscar
-> alexalbon not smooth.
-> danielricciardo not smooth.
-> charlesleclerc not smooth.
-> maxverstappen1 not smooth.
-> fbsfuser i think, and hear me out, maybe you're in the wrong here oscar
-> ynuser and this is why we were both wearing masks on track
-> oscarpiastri too far. you've gone TOO far.
Instagram: 10/03-21/03
ynuser posted a story 10s
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Liked by yukitsunoda0511, landonorris, georgerussell, and others
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yukitsunoday0511: i will get you back one day.
-> ynuser: ngaww 😹
oscarpiastri: u are tho
-> ynuser: ik
->oscarpiastri: wait. are you?
danielricciardo: mind giving me an extra mic so i can do this when youre not with us?
-> ynuser check ur driver's room ;)
landonorris: how did he know 😨
-> ynuser: we been knew lan
oscarpiastri posted a story 7s
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Liked by landonorris, logansargeant, fbsfuser, and others
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ynuser: there's no way you pulled out a photo from when we were 13.
-> oscarpiastri: full on war. what are you gonna do about it?
-> ynuser: watch me
landonorris: u have to give this pic to me.
-> oscarpiastri: LMAO ty for joining my side
-> landonorris: no no, don't be mistaken. im against both of you.
-> oscarpiastri: mate what?
carlossainz55: u guys should just kiss already
-> oscarpiastri: carlos NO
mclaren: you're really trying to blackmail a journalist who has resources at her disposal? 😮
-> oscarpiastri: ...yes...
ynuser posted a story 3s
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Liked by maxverstappen1, pierregasly, alexalbon, and others
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alexalbon: congrats on winning soldier
-> ynuser ✊🏼
oscarpiastri: HOW DO U HAVE THESE PHOTOS ALREADY
-> ynuser: i like how u still underestimate my job then suffer because of it :)
pierregasly: these go hard 🔥
landonorris: well at least it's not as embarrassing for me. but a HEADS UP WOULDVE BEEN NICE
-> ynuser: bro dont even try ik you've been saving bad pics of me from oscar -.-
mclaren: we hope u enjoyed the pics!
-> ynuser: i owe u guys one fr 🙏🏼
Round 3 (22/03-24/03): Australia
ynuser
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Tagged: f1
ynuser round 3 in australia!!!! 🇦🇺🦘❤️ amazing to be back on home base, and even better to see danny ric and pastry fight it out for the podium! (actual, professional, and correct news coming from me on @f1 tv 🫡)
ossie ossie ossie! oi oi oi! get it? 'cause ossie is like aussie and... okay. i'll stop.
Liked by mclaren, fbsfuser, danielricciardo, and 611,805 others
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mclaren ty for providing us with baby pastry pics 🫡
-> ynuser pleasure doing business with u 🫡🫡
-> oscarpiastri excuse ME
oscarpiastri haha. so funny. at least u have stand up comedy since journalism may not work out :)
-> ynuser so you admit im funny 😸
-> oscarpiastri don't flatter urself.
-> landonorris nah mate, that sounded like defeat
f1 this commentary is fine 👍🏻
-> user LMAOOOO
user danny ric placing in his home base is such a dream come true 😭
-> user yeah im glad it isnt just a dream anymore
user cutiessssss
-> user them driving around the circuit in a golf cart must've been chaotic
-> logansargeant u have no idea...
user she's hilarious ilysm
-> fbsfuser back off fam she's mine ✋🏼
-> user i need to know how she this job cause it is THE dream fr
-> fbsfuser yeah it really is a wonder given how many lectures she slept thru...
-> ynuser OI
danielricciardo 🫶🏻
-> user CONGRATS HONEY BADGER!!!
user can oscar fight???
-> user girl what are u talking about they aint tgt
-> user they aren't???
-> user no bruh theyre just besties
user watch me at the next race rizzin her up
Twitter
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iMessages
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Instagram Messages
landonorris: yn
-> yn
-> yn
-> yn
ynuser: bruh WHAT
landonorris: it's important
ynuser: lando i don't have time to answer whether a new pair of pants make u look flat
-> go ask osc
landonorris: ok first of all: a good pair makes a huge difference.
-> and second, it's about osc
ynuser: did smth happen to him?????
landonorris: no, sorry
-> shouldn't have led with that
-> i sent u a post on twitter
-> but just, read carefully k?
Twitter
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Instagram Messages
ynuser: oh
landonorris: u see it?
ynuser: yeah
landonorris: are u okay?
ynuser: yeah im just surprised
landonorris: so you didn't know about it either?
ynuser: obviously not
landnorris: im sorry yn :(
ynuser: why? it's not like he owes me anything lol
-> im happy he started dating again in fact
-> was getting worried lol
landonorris: u sure u good?
-> doesn't really sound like u are
ynuser: im fine
-> plus i need to stay professional. i still have a job and there are crazy fans and all
-> thanks anyways lan
landonorris: alright, im here to talk if u need
-> so is the rest of the grid tbh
❤️ Liked by ynuser
iMessage
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Instagram: 03/04
ynuser
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Tagged: urmumuser
ynuser a little break back home with the parents doesn't hurt 🌊
@f1's the best for letting me regenerate lost brain cells <3
Liked by f1, fbsfuser, racerbia, and 702,009 others
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f1 we got ur back queen ✊🏼
-> user in the middle of all the drama, this could mean so many things...
-> user well im gonna take it as them sayin that theyre on the right ship :)
user ngl guys the distance rn is probably 'cause yn and osc so close, especially with osc dating brianna, like she probably did it out of respect for them. no one wants to be 'the girl he told me not to worry about' yk.
-> user allegedly dating*
-> user allegedly dating*
user omg the parallelism with the surfboards 😭
-> user we've truly reached peak delulu i love it
landonorris enjoy ur break from a grid of shitheads 💪🏼
-> carlossainz55 speak for urself
wbuxtonofficial how am i going to handle them without you 0.0
-> ynuser well, not to state the obvious, but drivers are just... humans.
-> georgerussell hilarious
racerbia gorgeous girl 🧡
fbsfuser take me with u 😔
Round 4 (05/04-07/04): Japan
mclaren
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Tagged: oscarpiastri, landonorris, vindiesel, and mrodofficial
mclaren A little surprise for our papaya boys as they come back from their Friday practices! 🤫 Here's to hoping we go fast and furious in the land of sakura 🌸
Liked by f1, ynuser, racerbia, and 851,092 others
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user the lack of yn's interactions with the whole grid is actually making me glitch throughout this weekend. and it's only friday 💀💀
user omggggg van diesel and michelle rod!!!!!!
user they really be spoiling osc lolll
user it's so weird to see an interview without yn
iMessages
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Instagram
mclaren
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Tagged: oscarpiastri
mclaren H A P P Y B I R T H D A Y @oscarpiastri!
Our baby driver is 23 today, here in Japan! Drive well, birthday boy! 😎🌸
Liked by f1, fbsfuser, racerbia, and 905,874 others
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user happy birthday ossie!!!
landonorris: our baby is growing up so fast
-> f1 we must shrink him.
user wow she must be pissed if she took her first annual leave during this totally coincidental time
-> user fr sis is fooling no one.
-> user this feels like such a bad omen omg 😭
-> user guys maybe our bestie yn just really needed a break... haha...
briannawood_ happy birthday osc ❤️
-> user oh my god
-> user she actually exists
-> user girl what are you doing here
-> user ayo???
alexalbon happy birthday!!!!!!!!!!!
lilyhme HAPPY BIRTHDAY OSC
fbsfuer hbd
-> user oh-
ynuser
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Tagged: oscarpiastri
ynuser to the one who vexes me, encourages me, n supports me sm, happy 23rd birthday. i've known you since your rebellious days, trying to prove to the rest of the world how your dream was worth fulfilling, and i'm grateful to have been with you to this very stage of your life. from re-watching cars and fast n furious for over a decade, to re-watching ur races and my interviews, know that i'll always be there, on or off track, no matter what. to the bane of my existence, from ur twin devil x
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user oh im gonna be sick is she the one who told f1 to invite vin diesel and michelle rod 😭💔
-> user u are spitting facts but in this case facts should not be facting because this is actually making me hyperventilate by all the drama rn
user no im sorry but why does this sound more like a goodbye than a hbd note
user yn trying to prove that she's actually a great write when she wants to be
-> user and SHE IS 😭😭😭
user the way she doesn't sound like herself AT ALL wtf is going on
user this sounds like a very strange way of resigning 💀
-> user YOU TAKE BACK WHAT U SAID RN
Comments on this post have been limited.
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Round 5 (19/04-21/04): China
ynuser
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Tagged: f1
ynuser im back 😈 lovely weather here in china as we start round 5's quali day!! let's get back to it 💪🏼
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f1 she's back!
user oh my god i thought we were never gonna see her ever again
lewishamilton missed our fav presenter
-> georgerussell frfr!!
-> mclaren actually ☝🏼 she was and will always be OUR fav
fsfbuser welcome back gorgeous <3
user well... the good news is that she sounds normal again
-> user nah bruh im right here in the paddock and she looks nervous/twitchy af
user the besties obvie haven't made up yet 😪
-> user or maybe they never will...
oscarpiastri come on back over to our pit, you left before i finished changing ?
-> user oH WTF
-> user this shit is actually going to be the death of me
-> landonorris i thought we agreed that i'd call her? 🤨
-> charlesleclerc hush for a little while she's over at ours rn
-> user this is too funny
-> user is this a pr trick or some shit 'cause IT'S NOT FUNNY ANYMORE
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Instagram
oscarpiastri
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Tagged: ynuser
oscarpiastri you are never escaping me ever again.
(forgive my impulsive actions tonight everyone, i swear im only ever like this around her)
Liked by landonorris, fbsfuser, ynuser, and 1,397,819 others
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francisca.cgomes SHUT THE FRONT DOOR. FINALLY.
-> lilymhe I KNOW RIGHT
-> pierregasly oscar can be so oblivious sometimes...
-> fbsfuser boy he was blind, deaf, and dumb for as long as i've known them. like pick a struggle??
-> landonorris i second this
logansargeant kinda giving serial killer vibes but u two are cute enough to forgive that
-> ynuser 🤪
-> maxverstappen1 i can finally go back to the garage in peace without u following me to talk my ear off
-> oscarpiastri u knew this whole time??
user i am going insane.
-> user maybe i hit the blunt too good this time...
-> user @landonorris and @fbsfuser u guys are the gods of all wingmen.
user oh thank god he wasn't actually dating brianna
-> user our queen and king can come back stronger and better now 😩
user your honour, nvm, my parents just got back tgt :D
ynuser 10 years, both of us having a nasty high school relationship each, and a rumour bomb that exploded from underneath me... i think i have every right to try and escape again.
-> oscarpiastri this was not funny when u first said it, and it will never be.
-> logansargeant ok but it kind of is
user my fav writer inspo is now my fav driver's wag MY HEART
landonorris thank god i dont need to listen to the both of you whining anymore
-> ynuser who said we're stopping 🤨
-> oscarpiastri you can't escape me either lando.
-> landonorris this is foul @mclaren i suggest you give me a raise for keeping ur other driver in check
-> f1 haha no.
mclaren thank god we don't have to whisper every time we see something suspicious now
-> redbullracing im ngl, same.
-> astonmartinf1 we once had to watch while they bantered with each other for 10 minutes 🧍🏻‍♀️
-> scuderiaferrari not that it's a competition, but they were always close to pecking each other whenever they were here
-> alexalbon wait why were they even in any of these garages??
-> mclaren ask oscar why he keeps following her...
user that interview was INSANE
-> user i don't think i've ever seen such a surreal confession oml
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a/n: lowkey cringey hehe. this was supposed to involve a wedding (for a mclaren engineer not oscyn loll) where they'd all be dressed up (you know... DRESS) but i reached the pics limit 💀 honestly i would've written this out as a one shot or smth but once i start i will never stop... and i have my ibdp math final 😭
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eternalsa2z · 18 hours
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Dear Diary
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DAY 1
I don't know why I'm doing this. I found this hot pink journal in my room. The logo is a little silly but it'd be a shame to waste all the paper. So I guess I'll write down what I'm thinking.
DAY 3
Honestly this has been nicer than I expected. It feels good to get your thoughts down on paper. Then you don't have to think so hard about your troubles.
DAY 7
I noticed how negative I've been when journaling. So I decided to be more positive and try some new things. Dress nicer. Take care of my appearance more.
DAY 14
I went to the salon today. It was a strange impulse after writing down things I wanted to improve. Just a little trim...maybe some highlights. Something simple.
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DAY 15
I went full blonde today. Light blonde. I should feel self-conscious but it feels...sooooo good!
DAY 28
Another salon day! Got a touch up with a cute pigtail hairstyle...and a bit more. The girls convince me try some filler and more than a 'lil makeup. It felt like a lot but they were sooooo excited. So I couldn't help being excited too!
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DAY 40
Like, people are looking at me funny. Is it my clothing? They, like, don't fit as much any more. My boobies...I mean breasts...seem bigger. Butt seems rounder. Oh well! Time for a shopping spreeeeee!
DAY 47
Um, like, sorry for not writing more. I've been, like, sooooo forgetful of late. I do my makeup, squeeze on a cute outfit, then I totes forget anything else! Is that bad? 'Course not! It feels too good to be, like, empty headed
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DAY 55
Cherry is having truble trouble thinking. Cherry can't, like, 'member lyfe life before writing in diary. Was Cherry, always blonde, busty, and unsofisycated unintellygant dumb? It's like Cherry's thot thoughts all gone once she writes. But at least, like, she's hawt! :)
DAY 69
Cherry iz, like, luving lyfe! Peepole call me, lyke, a dumbo bimbo...but Cherry soooo doesn't care! Cherry iz happy. Cherry iz cute. Cherry iz, like, no thinky any more since she start wryting in diary.
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fanfictionalraven · 2 days
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Dream Warriors Chapter 4
Title: Dream Warriors Chapter 4
Summary: Sam and the reader discuss her dreams. Dean and the reader make some progress on the case and their relationship.
Characters: Reader, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, other original characters
Word Count: 3,700
Warnings: Mentions of miscarriage, angst
Read Chapter 3 here.
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You and Sam both continue to stare at your perfectly healed hands. All traces of the burns were now gone. You look up at Sam, tears stinging your eyes.
“You saw that, right?? I’m not going crazy. You saw that too,” you practically beg. He nods his head slowly, trying to process what he’d just witnessed.
“What’s going on, Y/N?” He asks. You shake your head quickly, looking back at your hands.
“I wish I knew,” you mumble. You flex your hands slowly, wiggling your fingers as well. “I’ve been having these dreams. We thought it was just stress from the miscarriage and due date but now…”
“Dreams?” Sam asks, watching you closely. You look up at him and nod.
“It’s all so normal. No monsters. Our families are alive. Dean and I are very clearly in love but I married someone else who’s been cheating on me. You finished school and you’re getting married to Jessica,” you tell him. He frowns a little more and nods. “When I’m there, when I’m in the dreams, all of this is just a dream. A dream I hardly pay attention to. And it all feels real, holding my daughter feels real.”
“The burns?” He asks, cutting his eyes to your hands.
“I went to get a pie from the oven in a rush and forgot potholders,” you explain. He nods again then shrugs his shoulders.
“Okay, ugh…normally, I’d agree that it’s just your subconscious but…” He trails off and you nod. “What are you thinking? A spell? A djinn maybe?” He asks as he makes his way back to his laptop. You frown, pulling your knees into your chest.
“I don’t know what to think, Sam,” you tell him. He nods and starts to type on his computer. You sit in silence for a moment before looking around. “Where’s Dean?”
“Went to talk to the sheriff again,” he says, picking up John’s journal. You roll your eyes, throwing the blankets off of yourself.
“The sheriff isn’t going to talk to him. Why didn’t he wake me?” You ask as you move to your bag. You open it to find that Dean had taken your fed clothes last night and put them away neatly.
“He wanted to let you sleep as much as possible. You really scared him last night,” he says. You stop what you’re doing and look at him, confused. “When you heard that baby crying?”
“That was Ella,” you say. He raises an eyebrow in question and you sigh, looking back into your bag. “My daughter. I mean – the baby in my dreams.” Sam frowns as he watches you.
“Y/N, she isn’t real,” he reminds you. Rolling your eyes, you rise to your feet, clothes in hand.
“I told you, Sam. When I’m in the dreams, she’s the realest thing in the world. I’d give my life for her in a heartbeat,” you tell him. He nods slightly.
“Well try not to do that. Minor injuries may heal but dying?” He asks. You frown and nod, turning for the bathroom. “Want me to call Dean?”
“I’m not gonna tell him,” you inform Sam before closing the door behind you. You hear his chair scrape the floor before he approaches the door.
“What do you mean you aren’t telling him?” He asks. Sighing, you begin to change clothes.
“He’s already worried about me enough. I’m not giving him more reason to,” you call through the door to him.
“Y/N, something is hurting you in your dreams. That’s not something you should hide from him,” he says. You finish buttoning up your shirt and pull the door open again.
“Please. We can figure this out. Me and you,” you plead with him. He shakes his head slightly, conflicted.
“Nothing good ever comes from any of us keeping secrets, Y/N. You tell us that all the time,” he says, crossing his arms over his chest. You reach out and place your hands on his arms gently.
“Sam, I’m begging you. Just…one day. Let’s see what we can find in one day and if we don’t get anything or if things get worse tonight, then I’ll tell him,” you say. You bite your lip, waiting for his response. A car door closes from just outside the room and your pleading look turns to panic. “Sam, please.”
“Okay. Fine. One day,” he relents, turning back towards his table in the corner. You let out a sigh as the door to the room opens and Dean steps in. He’s got three cups of coffee and a white bag in his hands. He smiles widely when he sees you.
“Hey, Sleeping Beauty finally woke up,” he teases, setting the breakfast he’d picked up down on the table. Sam takes one of the coffees and looks into the bag.
“Find anything out?” He asks, pulling a glazed donut from the bag. Dean picks up the other two cups and starts towards you.
“Well, they finally got an ID on one of the victims. Monica Lester. Married. From a town about an hour east of here,” he informs you both. He holds one of the cups out to you and you smile a little, taking it. You thank him and he winks at you before sitting on the edge of the bed. “Sheriff Anderson has so graciously agreed to let me do the notification.”
“I’ll go with you,” you tell him before taking a drink from the coffee. He frowns at you and shakes his head.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea. The man just lost the woman he loved and their unborn baby, Y/N,” he says. You sigh and nod, walking over to the table.
“And if anyone can understand at least part of that, it’s us,” you tell him as you reach into the bag yourself.
“Yea, just part of it, sure,” Dean mumbles, rising to his feet. You look at him quickly.
“What?” You ask. He smiles a little and shakes his head, walking over as well.
“Sammy, you good to stay back and keep digging?” He asks. Sam glances between the two of you before nodding.
“Yea, I’m fine,” he says. You give him a pointed look and he nods his head once. “I’ll let you know if I find anything.”
The two of you load into the front seat of the Impala and begin the hour-long drive to the first victim’s house. The ride is quiet, neither of you saying much at all. The invisible wall between you, that you had just started to believe could be torn down, now seemed to be reinforced and even bigger somehow. Dean parks the car on the curb in front of the house and the two of you look over at it.
“You sure about this?” Dean asks. You look over at him.
“Oh, now you’re talking to me again?” You ask. He stares at you for a moment, seemingly stunned. “Yes, I’m sure. Come on.” Pushing the door open a bit too violently, you climb out of the car and slam the door. Dean gets out quickly and rushes around.
“I don’t know why you’re mad at me, but you don’t have to take it out on the car,” he says, fixing his tie. You stop in your tracks halfway across the yard. Dean gets only a few steps ahead of you before stopping and looking back.
“I just wish you’d talk to me,” you tell him. He shakes his head, taking a step towards you.
“Talk to you? Y/N, I try to talk to you all the time. You shut me down,” he huffs, exasperation clear on his face. You stare at him before walking to the front door quickly. “See??”
“We’re on a job, Dean,” you insist, reaching for the doorbell. He grabs your hand before you can make contact with the button, holding on to you tight.
“Y/N,” he pleads. You pull your hand away from his and press the button, hearing the bell ring inside. Footsteps quickly approach the door and Dean straightens up, reaching into his coat pocket as you do the same. The door opens and a man, around the same age as you and Dean, looks between you.
“Chris Lester?” Dean asks. The man nods, panic quickly spreading across his face. “We’re with the FBI. Agents Wayne and Prince. Could we speak with you?”
“Oh God,” he prays, voice trembling. You reach out and place a comforting hand on his arm.
“We should sit down,” you tell him. He nods his head slightly before turning to lead the way. You two follow and Dean pushes the door closed, glancing around the house. Mr. Lester leads the two of you into what seems to be the living room of the house. He sits on the edge of an arm chair as you and Dean take seats on the couch. The man leans forward and wrings his hands nervously.
“Is this about Monica?” He asks. You glance at Dean and he sighs, looking down at his own hands.
“Mr. Lester, we’re sorry to have to inform you but…your wife’s body was found three days ago about an hour from here,” Dean tells him.
Chris’ face falls slowly as each word is processed. You can see the moment his heart breaks in his eyes. He slumps forward with a wail and Dean quickly reaches out, catching him. You allow Mr. Lester a few minutes with his grief before Dean speaks to him again.
“I know it’s hard but we need you to answer a few questions so we can catch whoever did this.” Chris nods and slowly moves himself back into the chair. Dean sits back on the couch and straightens his jacket.
“Can we get you anything?” You ask. Chris shakes his head and wipes at his cheeks.
“No. You, ummm, you have questions?” He asks, voice still thick with tears. You nod and look at Dean.
“Do you know of anyone who would want to hurt your wife?” He questions. Chris shakes his head, looking at his hands.
“No one. Monica is…” He stops and swallows back more tears. “She was an amazing woman. Everyone loved her. What happened?” You frown and shake your head.
“We’ll spare you the details for now but it doesn’t appear that she suffered,” you tell him. He nods slightly, running his hands over his face.
“Why would someone do this?” He asks, starting to lose it again. Dean reaches out, placing a comforting hand on Chris’ shoulder.
“It’s not going to make sense. No matter what we find out. Believe me. I know how you feel,” he tells him. Chris looks up at him and you bite your lip, looking down at your hands. “About three months ago, my girlfriend went to the store. Broad daylight in a crowded parking lot, a man stabbed her. She was six months pregnant. I lost them both that day.” You look at Dean quickly, fighting back tears. Chris shakes his head slightly. Before you can say anything, the sound of little feet running causes you all to sit up straight.
“Daddy.” A little girl, about four or five, runs into the room. “Who are you?” She asks, looking between you and Dean. Chris wipes at his eyes before forcing a smile.
“They’re friends,” he tells her. You put on your best smile before rising and walking over to her.
“My name’s Y/N. What’s yours?” You ask, kneeling down in front of her. She smiles back at you widely.
“Claire,” she says. Your smile widens a little.
“I have a friend named Claire,” you tell her. “Could you show me your room?” She nods quickly and takes your hand, pulling on it. She leads you up the stairs and into an adorably decorated princess bedroom where she immediately runs over to her dollhouse.
You take a seat at a little tea table in the corner where you spend the next several minutes being introduced to a number of dolls. This is immediately followed by a Barbie fashion show, Claire showing off all of her outfits. While you smile and laugh at the young girl, you can’t help but think back to what Dean had said. I lost them both that day. It felt like the final nail in the coffin that now held your relationship.
After a few minutes, a gentle knock at the door draws your attention. It opens and Chris steps into the room, a sad smile on his face. He tells you that Dean is outside and you say goodbye to Claire before going downstairs. Stepping out onto the porch, you find Dean in the yard on his phone, presumably with Sam.
“Yea, sounds good. We’ll see you later,” he says before hanging up. He drops his phone back into his coat pocket. “He’s got the names of the other two victims. They’re from the same town the opposite direction so he’s gonna go see their families.” You nod slightly and cross your arms, looking down. “Y/N…”
“I’m not dead, you know,” you cut him off. He scoffs a laugh causing you to look up.
“Yea, I know. Do you?” He asks. You stare at him, stunned. “I tried talking to you in the car and you were practically catatonic. You’re mourning. I get that. I am too. But I’m not the one doing the pushing.” You shake your head slightly.
“I’m not…”
“You are! You flinch away from my touch. You barely speak to me. I want to hold you again. I want to kiss you again. I want to make love to you again. And if you aren’t ready for that yet, that’s fine. I get that. But…tell me what I need to do to fix this,” he pleads. You shake your head again, fighting back a sob, and move to walk past him. He reaches out, catching your elbow. “Y/N, talk to me!” You spin to face him, jerking your arm from his grasp.
“Get mad!!” You snap at him, shoving at his chest. He stumbles a step back. “You never got mad!!”
“I’m mad as hell. If you’d seen what I did to that demon when I found him…” He trails off and you wipe at your eyes quickly.
“Not at the demon, Dean!! Get mad at me!! Blame me!! It was my fault!!” You scream at him through your sobs. He stares at you, wide eyed, and shakes his head. “It was. I was her mother and I should have protected her better.”
“Sweetheart, I could never blame you for that. If anyone’s to blame, it’s me,” he says, reaching out for you.
“No, you’re not!! You weren’t even there!!” You insist as he gently takes your arms in his hands.
“Exactly. If I hadn’t been out on a hunt, if I had been home with you, I could have stopped him and we’d have our baby right now,” he says. You shake your head as you stare at him, bewildered.
“That’s ridiculous. We agreed you’d continue to hunt,” you tell him. He nods slightly, slowly pulling you closer to him.
“What’s even more ridiculous is you thinking I could or should blame you. From the day you found out you were pregnant, you were in full mom-mode. And it was the greatest thing I’d ever seen. You stopped hunting, stopped drinking, stopped eating junk. You were already an amazing mom and she wasn’t even here yet,” he says, his voice soft and calming. His arms hesitantly and slowly wrap around your waist, pulling you into his chest. Your firsts clench at the lapels of his jacket, as though you’re clinging on for dear life. “Let me fix it,” he pleads. A sob breaks through as you bury your face in his chest. Dean’s chin comes to rest on top of your head as he holds you close, rubbing circles into your back.
The two of you stand in that same spot, clinging on to one another, for what feels like forever. Your sobs eventually begin to subside and Dean’s arms loosen enough for you to look up at him. His lips brush your forehead and you feel yourself smile.
“Sam’s out for a little while. What do you say we go back to the room and talk some more?” He asks, looking down at you. You nod, wiping at your cheek.
“I like the sound of that,” you tell him. He smiles a little and leaves one arm around your waist as he pulls you to the waiting Impala. He opens the door for you and you slide in all the way to the middle.
After closing the door, Dean goes around and slips into the driver’s seat. He looks at you and smiles widely as you wrap your arms around his, laying your head on his shoulder. His hands come to rest on your knee, his thumb rubbing back and forth slowly as he sets out for the motel again.
The ride back is quiet again but a different, comfortable silence. You stay tucked into Dean’s side, holding on tight to his arm as he drives. Occasionally, he turns and places a kiss on top of your head. Each time, you respond with a kiss to his shoulder. For the first time in a long time, things actually begin to feel right again.
Back at the motel, you take a seat on the edge of the bed you’re sharing and watch as he makes his way around the room. He removes his suit jacket and lays it across the back of a chair before starting to loosen his tie. You smile as you watch the muscles in his shoulders through the tight dress shirt he’s wearing. You’re on your feet before you have a chance to second guess yourself. Slowly, you wrap your arms around him from behind. He tenses up for only a split second before relaxing in your arms. Standing on your toes, you press a kiss against his shoulder blade.
“I love you,” you whisper into the fabric of his shirt. His fingers ghost over your arms before he turns to face you. You pull your arms in between the two of you now, your hands resting on his firm chest. He caresses your cheek with the back of his fingers before quickly closing the distance between you. Your lips move together in unison as he grips at your hips, pulling you impossibly closer.
************************************************************************
Later in the afternoon, you’re lying on top of Dean, your arms crossed over his bare chest as you watch him. He smiles at you sleepily and you can’t help but laugh.
“Wear you out?” You ask. He shakes his head, his hands running over your exposed back slowly.
“Nah, I’m good,” he says. You smile as you watch him for a moment. He reaches up and pushes your hair behind your ear gently.
“I’m sorry I pushed you away,” you apologize. He smiles a little and shakes his head.
“We’re gonna be okay, Sweetheart,” he assures you. You nod slightly before stretching up and catching his lips with yours once more. He smiles in the kiss and threads his fingers into your hair.
The door opens suddenly and you pull away from Dean with squeak as Sam comes into the room.
“Hey – come on, guys!!” He says, turning his back quickly. Dean smirks at you as you scramble to pull the sheet across your chest. “I asked if you wanted a separate room for a reason.”
“Calm down, Sammy. What ya got?” Dean asks, pushing himself up in the bed. Sam glances over his shoulder slowly to make sure you’re covered before turning to face the two of you again.
“I’ve got a pretty solid lead on the Manananggal,” he says, handing Dean a brochure. You look over his shoulder at it and frown.
“That’s just a Lamaze class, Sam,” you tell him. Dean nods slightly, opening the pamphlet.
“Yea, Y/N and I were looking into some,” he says. Sam nods quickly.
“Exactly. What better place for a monster to find pregnant women than a class for pregnant women? I checked and all the victims attended this class at least once,” he says. Dean hands the pamphlet back to him then leans over the side of the bed, picking his previously discarded jeans up.
“Worth a shot. You coming?” He asks, looking at you as he pulls them back on. You bite your lip before shaking your head.
“I don’t think that would be a good place for me right now,” you tell him. Relief washes over him before he rises from the bed and rushes to the bathroom. You watch him go before looking at Sam. “Did you find anything?” You ask him quietly. He shakes his head, frowning.
“Nothing yet,” he tells you. You frown as well and nod, looking down at your hands. The memories of the burns come back to you. “If you go to sleep, just be careful, okay?”
“Yea,” you say, nodding slightly. Dean comes back out of the bathroom a few minutes later, fully dressed in his usual plaid and jacket combo. He smiles at you before giving you a quick kiss.
“We’ll be back. Get some rest,” he says. You smile your best and nod.
“Just be careful,” you tell him. He kisses you one more time before following Sam out the door and to the car. You fall back onto the mattress with a heavy sigh and run your hands over your face before pulling the blankets up around yourself. Your hands slips down to your stomach and you feel the scar. You know it’s real. The pain and grief. The love you have for Dean. It’s all real.
“This is real,” you repeat to yourself over and over, a steady mantra as you drift off to sleep in the late evening.
“This is real,” you mumble as your eyes open to the darkness of the very early morning. Your hand still on your stomach, you feel the smooth skin before sitting up and looking around Dean’s bedroom. “This is real,” you tell yourself, looking at the bandages on your hands.
***
Forever Tags: @roseblue373
Jensen Tags: @lostin-jensenseyes
Dream Warriors: @aylacavebear @winharry @djs8891 @suckitands33 @rickgrimeswifeu @deans-spinster-witch @jackles010378 @foxyjwls007 @cutiesarah @urinternetmom @justrealizedimmascifygurl @kr804573 @thej2report @just-levyy @snowayumi @alisyacsa
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pastafossa · 9 months
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Hit up a used bookstore today. I'm looking for old illustrations, basically, to collage into my junk journal style binder. Hopefully coming from books that would otherwise wind up in the garbage.
Had two interesting finds today!
The first: a book from the 70s about healthy herbs. Whoever owned it underlined a TON of stuff under slippery elm and mallow root (sore throat maybe?). They also left behind two things: a pressed leaf, and a fairly recent looking baby photo, used as a bookmark! Maaaaybe not the best choice for a bookmark. Has some nice illustrations!
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Second: an even older book about herbal remedies, that appears to have once been a Catholic school library book in Buffalo, NY, though originally printed in London! It's still got its library card with names and everything, and some sort of like... Mary prayer card (idk, I'm not a Catholic, I just write one). I'm not sure how old it is (I think from 1950, the printing date is like... roman numerals?), but let's just say kids at the school were reading this book before my parents were even born. Interestingly, the only page with a fold or note in it is, again, slippery elm (follklore: ends pregnancies; coincidence at a catholic school?). It's got beautiful illustrations though, in between hilarious rants about girls PAINTING THEIR NAILS GREEN HOW SCANDALOUS and some... interesting remedies that I wouldn't really trust anymore. 😂
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crumbleclub · 10 months
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my brain keeps trying to delete my childhood memories and it's mostly just annoying because i was USING THAT to WRITE ANGST
but like. joke's on my brain bc now i'l just write mikey repressing shit. i am sticking my tongue out at u, blehhh
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peachiyyy · 2 years
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on another note, i have to stop getting acrylic nails fr now bc my last & current set broke/is breaking off quicker than they usually do bc my natural nails can’t handle it anymore i guess. The only problem is that i’ve been using them as a source to look and feel more feminine so now i’m questioning my entire self and connection to womanhood. My natural nails don’t grow nicely but either way it doesn’t matter bc I can’t keep my natural nails long since I immediately start scratching myself and create bruises and painful open wounds on my skin.
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werebutch · 1 year
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The way my parents ruined my coming adulthood is insane. I take after my dad who is a deadbeat and neglectful and just a fucking idiot in general. And of course I got all the Sickness genes from him so I’m soooo happy about that. But anyways I’m not talking abt that I’m talking abt how he’s ruined the chances of me having kids. Obviously I would not birth them myself 😭 but I love kids and love the idea of having them in the future. But I know I shouldn’t bc of how my parents are.. I know I don’t have enough willpower to completely turn around what my parents have raised me like and break the cycle. It’s not that I don’t want to, I’m just being realistic. And in reality I am a lazy unmotivated short tempered person who gets way too caught up in depression and my own feelings. Just like my dad. It’s not nearly as bad as him but I’m sure it will get worse over time. It’s selfish of me to think this of him and resent him over things he mostly can’t control but it’s so hard not to. When me and my sisters needed him most he was sleeping and watching movie after movie on the couch never moving. I had to start taking care of myself and my sisters age 11 through being extremely suicidal, chronically ill, and bullied. I developed ptsd from it which has certainly gotten better over the years but it still affects me. I just have too many issues to have kids. I’ve used up all my nurturing energy on my sisters (and even my parents because they act like children) when I shouldn’t have needed to. The whole thing is just ruined for me and that’s one reason I’ll always hold a grudge against my parents, but especially my dad. Which is ironic because it’s my mother who left. I’ll only be able to enjoy being around kids when they’re someone else’s.
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faeriesthrall · 2 years
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i have cried at work 2 days in a row this week. i love having a job:)
#i genuinely only have a day left in this department and my manager here was set on ruining my week#i genuinely had a report assigned to me out of the blue yesterday despite the fact that i asked whether i would need to submit anything#when i left this department#like i hate nothing more than a change of plans last minute and i cannot explain how frustrating this rotation has been because#the people here just don't want tk actually help me like everytime i ask for something they're like sure and then never do the thing?#like I'd not going to treat grown adults with kids like children and repeatedly ask them for the same shit#anyway so i get this report given to me and i haven't even had a chance to read through any other reports just so i have context#so i spent like 6 hours post work yesterday figuring the reports out using a template i literally only got from a coworker who isn't#even in this department so like this department continues to be fucking useless#so i spend my night working on this so i could have it done by 8 this morning and then i sent it to the manager#only for him to say its not what he wanted from me which like how would i have known what he wanted since he didn't fucking tell me#like ask for a failure investigation report and i gave you a failure investigation report#he now says he wanted me to research and explain the failure mechanism and describe it's process?????#like hello why didn't you fucking say that#i'm genuinely so pissed i've wasted so much time on this when i have an evaluation practice session on monday#anyway am i a crybaby? maybe but i just don't like having shit sprung up on me with poorly explained scopes because it's a waste of time#should this have gone into my journal? maybe#do i care? no
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crown-ov-horns · 7 days
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I took the leap. I made a Good Omens fanwork playlist. It's... mostly just Ghost right now, and some Alice Cooper. My music taste hardly vibes with GO.
Also, I think the playlist cover picture is very fitting.
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Because I target Crowley for no reason, and later feel bad about it.
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bukuoshin · 5 months
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Okay, it's. It's probably safe to say I'm autistic, lol
#rae rants#i took the autism test twice before and. both said 'yeah autism' but i was like. well it's just one test and maybe it's coincidence.#the r one. anyways. yesterday. i found a site that was like a megapost of autism tests and i took... i think 6 tests from established#like. medical journals and psychology sites. and they all were just like 'yeah you have autism' so.#i mean I'm not gonna get a diagnosis but when i was going thru the questions i was like. 'doesn't everyone do that? no one does that!'#when it was decidedly not the case. and then idr how but i got on quora for a related but different topic and got to some#question by someone who is highly suspecting being autistic but didn't understand one of the questions. and before ppl even got to their#explanations (which i always inherently understood) they'd be like 'sorry for the block of text for smth that could use a 2-3 word answer.#that's a symptom of autism.' and when i told my mom abt that she was like. yeah. thats you.#also. i think this is funny. 3/5 of my family has gone 'am i autistic?' and told that to each other.#and we went to watch my brother the other day do a presentation thing for the career he's going into. and we could recognize him (aside from#his unique clothing set-up-- he was rhe only one w a black coat and tan pants) we could identify him cuz he'd be a loner or he'd like.#waddle a little bit while walking. and i know i have a bit of a bob to my step and my mom waddles too (but thats a medical thing).#and after i finished the test i was like. oh yeah isnt 'strange gait' a symptom of autism.#and when i told my mom she was like 'yeah i think we're all autistic. but we're not getting diagnosed bc let's avoid bigotry.' and. yeah.#i mean. obvs its not just cuz i too a handful of online tests. ive been exhibiting symptoms my friend. like ones i should have seen and gone#'well duh' like im selectively mute. always have been. and when i read 'mostly autistic ppl are selectively mute' i was like.#'but im the specialest little exception in the whole wide world :3c'#as well as other related shit. ya know.#knowing my history tho i haven't been officially diagnosed with anything but it's all in my notes. like my medical chart.#so with my weird good-bad luck I could straight up be like 'i have exhibited signs of autism since early childhood' and they'd write#that word for word in my chart. which avoids the oppression of a diagnosis but also doesn't help me much besides that ya know?#if we're mutuals you might have seen me be like 'do i have autism? no i don't have autism but this post is so relatable.'#whilst exhibiting symptoms.#... is 'exhibiting symptoms' offensive to say? it's one of those phrases I've been stuck on lately cuz it's real short hand for#'i recognize this bc i am familiar with it due to my experiences with mental health' but idk if it's taken that way :\
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gotham-daydreams · 7 months
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How would it have gone differently if Reader didn't try to be an "overachiever" and instead just stayed quiet and didn't interact with anyone besides Alfred until they left? Their room they left being mostly blank, with only the music journals? Giving up on trying to get their attention.
I think what's so funny about this ask, to me, is that I already have a concept like this written down (along with 3 others since the current reader I'm writing for the "Not [ ]" series is one of them but with a few missing details), so this'll be fun!
I guess it generally goes how you'd expect? Which is different for the most part, but the reader's perspective on what's happening is also different.
Granted, I would like to point out that, at least for this particular concept and the idea I have for it of how this would go, does have more stuff going on pre-Batfam that do affect how they perceive what's happening, and that's what makes things interesting in my opinion. Because someone can be naturally shy or just overall more reserved either out of nature or because they feel a certain way, but still feel bad about being neglected and, despite their lack of effort, feel that pain just as much as someone who's tried. Which is valid! Besides, someone's definition of 'trying' can vary as well.
Everyone should have a chance to have a family, and form some kind of connection with people. Just because you aren't going above and beyond for one person, doesn't mean you're undeserving of certain things. Especially not a chance to have a family, or feel like you have one. That's what I think anyway.
Nevertheless, back to the reader!
From the original concept, I will be tweaking a few things to fit the ask, but the same general outcome remains! Though again, the reader's perspective on things is a tad different. But how about this- I'll show two versions of the reader.
One that's quiet and more reserved because they gave up much earlier, or just generally hopeless really early on because maybe they felt as if anything they'd do just wouldn't be enough, who'll be accurately named Quiet!Reader. With the other being more closely related to the concept I wrote for such an idea, that we'll refer to as Waiting!Reader.
Quiet!Reader would change up things quite a bit! I won't lie!
They might already have bad self-esteem that's quick to develop at the start of things, which is something to note as that doesn't get better with time. They grow more cold and distant from the family at a quicker pace both from personal and external reasons.
Put simply, they don't feel good enough, and even if they did- anything they could do to get the Batfam's attention would never be enough in their eyes. To which, they see very early on when they try to engage and do some things with the family, only to be turned down. What doesn't help is when Quiet!Reader sees Damian get adopted and almost immediately showered with love, (compared to them) and that really cements some ideas that were already developing in their head about the family.
When Damian comes into the picture, they feel replaced. Seeing him as someone to fill in the 'youngest Wayne' role instead of them, so that Bruce and the others actually have someone to acknowledge for such a title. Just someone else to further take away the little they had.
So, they further step out of the way, glaring at the Batfam with tired eyes before that eventually stops too. Envy clawing at their heart, hatred being sent through waves of pain all throughout their body. Hurt unmatched. Yet they still remain invisible. Quiet as ever. Unnoticed. Everything they ever felt dies down, and forms a cold numbness that they begin to associate with the family.
Maybe through that, they feel closer to the family in some twisted way. Now just as cold as them. Just as talkative, and just as engaging. Almost mirroring them, but they're honest about how they feel. Honest about what they think, and therefore better. At least when compared to the Batfam- and to them, even if it wasn't a high bar to reach anyway, at least it counts for something.
It was never Damian's fault, or really about Damian at all. It could've been anyone else and Quiet!Reader would've still reacted the same way, they know that. Though just seeing the Batfam show love and care to him and not them just makes them feel... worse.
Clearly they're capable of love, and can notice new additions to the family (to which they may have mostly believed that the Batfam's neglect was just something the family did for whatever reason, and thought that them being the youngest had something to do with it for a while) and that breaks the reader. It doesn't hurt, not as much as it would've, maybe, but whatever hurt is there dies down quickly as Quiet!Reader, well, quietly accepts their fate.
The Batfam clearly wants nothing to do with them, so why should they try to do all of these things for them? It's simple, they shouldn't. So they don't. Quiet!Reader gives up, and continues to live their life without them.
The Manor just becomes a place they sleep in, and nothing else. It isn't anything close to a home, and not even Alfred can help with that.
It's because of that little fact, however, that Quiet!Reader leaves much sooner than the reader in the "Not [ ]" series. Maybe once they get a friend they can trust, they essentially end up living with said friend, hence why their room remains so empty. The notebooks they even keep in the room they have in the Manor is from when they were way younger, instead of just being from a few months ago or so. We're talking years since Quiet!Reader has touched those things now.
Maybe they do 'officially' leave a month or so before they usually would as an overachiever in the "Not [ ]" series, having only bothered to return so often before because of Alfred. Though even then, they'd forget to return most nights- only being reminded to even try and go back once Alfred would personally call them, and ask them where they were.
However now, after a while of just the time between them basically living with their friend and sleeping at the manor, they stop returning altogether. Though this time around they instead personally go to Alfred to say they're goodbyes. Not explaining much, but just saying that while they might still try to come and visit him sometimes, they don't live in the Manor anymore. Alfred already knows this, and the embrace they share fully hammers in that fact.
Yet when Quiet!Reader turns away, and leaves the Manor for good- even through the front door at that. Alfred can't help but just... miss them already.
You see, while Quiet!Reader is indeed quieter and more reserved, especially towards the Batfam, with Alfred really being the only exception, they still made music.
Maybe they didn't have as many concerts or physical, grand, live performances compared to the reader in the "Not [ ]" series, they not only started earlier, but may have actually started out on a social platform such a youtube. They really started out small, but were able to find and start their passion much earlier!
Most of what they played was when they were in the Manor, but slowly they started to get involved with things music related outside of the Manor and in Gotham- and from there were able to build themselves up even more. Hell, I'd even say that Quiet!Reader is a little more well-known and popular than the reader in the "Not [ ]" series because of the amount of extra time they dedicated to their passion.
So basically, Alfred this time around has more recordings and such of Quiet!Reader actually doing something they love than with the one in the series. However! Funnily enough, they're gone for a shorter amount of time despite having left earlier than normal.
Alfred is just, extra fed up with this nonsense, and so pulls his tricks more early on, but also make them hit harder.
He doesn't clean Quiet!Reader's room to show how long they've been gone, adding onto the emptiness and almost abandoned feeling the room itself gives off because of how bare and empty it is. They're music haunts the halls, subtle, sure, but still noticeable- especially to those who are hyper aware all the time. Pictures of Quiet!Reader and Alfred begin to be hung up, and if he can manage- some with Quiet!Reader and their friends during important parts of their life.
No one is safe from the guilt and anguish Alfred seeks to cause to not only have the Batfam look for you, but most importantly, to finally notice you.
Let's just say, things work out a little too well.
---
As for Waiting!Reader? Oh man, I've been wanting to rant about them for a while!
Unlike the reader in the "Not [ ]" series and Quiet!Reader, Waiting!Reader had some semblance of a life before getting adopted into the Batfam. Though the idea and character themself isn't musically inclined/involved in music, or even all that interested in music for that matter- for the sake of this ask, lets say they are!
I won't dabble too much into the life Waiting!Reader had before the Batfam, as if I do end up writing them I'd also like to keep some details vague (for the sake of leaving it up to interpretation and everything), but just know that during the time they were still with their original family, they were essentially taught that they should 'wait their turn', and eventually their parents would spend time with them and care for them. Hence the little name I've given them.
So! When they get to the Manor and are officially adopted, only to be neglected and ignored during their first few attempts- because of their young age, they immediately think "oh! they're just like mom and dad!" So they 'wait' for 'their turn', believing that eventually, should they wait long enough, they'll be rewarded with bonding and such from the Batfam just as they were with their previous parents.
This mindset changes what they do as well, as Waiting!Reader even goes out of their way to not bother anyone, or "get in the way" of whatever they could be doing. Waiting!Reader treats the situation so much like their previous home life, that sometimes they might even forget that the Batfam are completely different people from their parents. The only real difference that they can think of is that they're not acknowledged at all and it seems like their 'turn' never comes. Though for a while that doesn't get them down. The Batfam is busy like they're parents were! Waiting!Reader is sure that when things die down then they'll have their time.
... Hopefully.
I can imagine that part of the reason why Waiting!Reader holds on to hope for so long is because, again, their own parents constantly reassured them that they would have their time eventually. That if they behaved, and stayed out of the way, then they would go somewhere fun with their parents and essentially be rewarded for their efforts. They were conditioned to wait, to be patient, and just comply until those around them decided to actually take care of them, and spend time with them.
Of course, as they grow up the reality of the situation does hit them eventually, but during that time they do try.
Waiting!Reader helps Alfred around the house, and so they mostly bond over doing chores, among other things. They are also more mindful, and try to keep the amount of noise they back down— so they actually don't play at the Manor all that often, and instead play literally anywhere else. If and when they do play outside, around the area of the Manor like in the gardens or something, they make sure no one is around before even thinking of playing.
Alfred does help them break a few of their habits that they got while living with their parents, but the one thing he can't seem to 'fix' is how absolutely quiet Waiting!Reader is when they walk around. Which, as on can imagine, doesn't exactly help in a situation where the whole family, except for the butler, is neglecting you.
The amount of times Waiting!Reader has caught Alfred off guard is more then you'd think for someone that works with the Dark Knight, and his various sidekicks and such, over the years. Which does say something, sure, but it's also funny!
Regardless, similar to Quiet!Reader, Waiting!Reader is able to start their musical career earlier than normal, and thuse becomes a little more popular than they would originally. However, they're more known for their live performances and giving back to the community. Seemingly just like Bruce as they attend charity event after charity event, and try to do good by the people.
Waiting!Reader also does genuinely try to become a vigilante as well, but they do so in a way where they only take care of the smaller/medium guys, and leave the bigger ones to the rest of the Batfam. This is because they want to remove possible distractions for their family, and while they would try to take on "bigger guys", they don't think they're skilled enough or experienced enough to even think about it. So they don't even try. (They also don't have the same theme as the Batfam- since they don't want to 'ruin' their reputation with what they're doing or something. Which does hell them further detach themself from the family later on.)
I'd say that with Waiting!Reader, the difference between them and the Batfam is more clear to them? Like, to them, the Batfam are just so good at what they do that they have no hope of reaching them. So instead of trying to reach for them, they just do their own thing and try to help in their own way.
Because Waiting!Reader takes care of smaller guys, they are kind of closer to Waiting!Reader as a vigilante.
The best way I can put it is that while the community trusts Batman and the members of the Batfam to save their city, they trust Waiting!Reader to save their homes.
So basically- Batfam is the bigger picture while Waiting!Reader focuses on the smaller picture.
Nevertheless! Also like Quiet!Reader, Waiting!Reader actually leaves earlier. Except when they leave, they leave.
Waiting!Reader straight up leaves Gotham City to attend the college that they want to go to, in an area that has more opportunity for them, that isn't close to where the Batfam lives or patrols.
So they not only leave earlier, but it also takes the Batfam longer to find them. Especially because Waiting!Reader does still do some things in Gotham, they just don't live there anymore.
I feel like out of all three readers, Waiting!Reader definitely feels like the kind of person that someone would assume is some kind of "Phantom of the Wayne Manor," y'know?
So Alfred definitely tries to make the Batfam feel bad like he does with Quiet!Reader. Except how anyone in the Batfam is reminded that Waiting!Reader even exists, and that they've been gone for a while now is through a letter that is accidentally sent to the Wayne Manor from one of Waiting!Reader's fans. From there, some research does start and the more the Batfam learns, the more they want to go and find the reader- you know the deal.
I hope this answered your question even if I really did ramble on this time- if you'd like me to clarify anything or go into more detail on a specific part, feel free to send in an ask!
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shroomi1e · 1 year
Text
❝ i object! ❞
kazuha + albedo
summary: you as a noble should naturally marry another noble, despite your love for another. your parents had managed to pry your lover off of you and get you wedded to a powerful nobleman- that is, until your past lover comes barging through the doors on your wedding day.
cw: gn!reader, arranged/forced marriage, teeny tiny bit of alcohol, angst to comfort
what i listened to while writing: wave - wave to earth
a/n: *slowly crawls out of my cave* hey guys. it's me again😭 i randomly got the motivation to write again, idk what demons possessed me to write this in the span of 5 hours but at least i have new content!!!! i was gonna do this with more characters but kazuha and albedo were the only ones i see pulling this cheesy-typa stuff tbh
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kazuha
“…what?”
your gaze fell down towards the wooden docks you were standing on. kazuha frowned, his grasp on your hand loosening. he was aboard the crux, and the crew was preparing to leave inazuma for another trip to liyue.
“i’m from one of the tri-commissions, kazuha,” you said defeatedly. “it’s over for us now. i’m going to be wedded as an alliance with another commission. i… i’m sorry…” but before kazuha could respond, the large ship began to sail away, his hands completely slipping away from yours.
kazuha leaned over the edge of the ship, watching your figure get smaller and smaller. though he hoped you would at least give him a wave goodbye, you simply turned around and left the docks of ritou, leaving him saddened and confused.
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kazuha spent the next month lost in his thoughts. ink blots were all that filled the pages of his journal now that he’s lost his muse.
“it’s over for us now.”
those words played in his mind like a broken record in hopes that maybe he could find a sense of doubt from those words, just a hint that it wasn’t truly over. he’s tried to understand, truly. but the thought of losing you ate kazuha up from the inside, especially knowing that he had no control over it. there weren’t any flaws in him or you that caused this, only circumstance. and that stung his heart more than anything.
despite kazuha’s wishes and prayers, the wedding would happen either way. news eventually reached his ears that two commissions from inazuma would be joined through a marriage between the two heirs, and that was when kazuha truly felt like he was losing control. you were being swept away so suddenly, carried away in the arms of another man. what was he to do?
you were being fitted into a kimono that very second, the maids tying the knots and wrapping the fabric around your body. your limbs felt heavy like lead, your head hanging low like rotten fruit on a tree. you tried to live in a fantasy just for at least a few moments, imagining that kazuha was the one you were being wed to, not a nobleman.
kazuha almost felt like a dream now that he was gone, as if he was only a fleeting imagination before you had to wake up to reality. the ephemeral touches, the honey-dipped sunsets, the smell of salt and the sea. that was all simply an illusion. you had to go back to the wooden floors, the inked papers and the melting candles. this was reality now, where everything was out of your control.
“this is all for the sake of our family, you know that?” your father’s voice broke your train of thought. “think of this as a way to pay us back for raising you. you’re much better off with a nobleman than that wandering fugitive anyways.”
you grit your teeth and tightened your fist, your knuckles whitening. “i know.”
the ceremony went through in a daze, the sacred sake tasting bitter on your tongue. a part of you felt like you should’ve just jumped on that ship along with kazuha. regret sat in your stomach like a sickly bag of bleach. but you knew it was for the better, both for you and your family.
after the vows, the priest then asked, “does anyone here object to the wedding?”
a heavy silence followed. the two of you were heirs to the biggest commissions in inazuma, it was obvious that nobody would dare to object this wedding. your gaze fell further down in defeat. it was really happening now.
“i object!”
your head snapped up from the ground and turned towards the voice. at the end of the crowd stood kazuha, the wind blowing softly through his hair, the golden light from the sunset outlining his silhouette.
emotions rushed through your chest: happiness, regret, sadness, doubt, and guilt. the cup you were holding dropped to the ground and shattered. the crowd began to murmur and gossip.
“kazuha,” you breathed out.
the crowd parted to make way for your lover, who confidently walked towards you and held his hand out. everything around you seemed to suddenly disappear the moment your fingertips met his. it was only the two of you now.
“kazuha… what on earth are you doing here?”
“i just need you to answer one question for me,” kazuha said softly. “do you trust me?”
by the way he eagerly interlocked his fingers with yours, his intentions were obvious. if you were to answer this question, it would mean throwing away everything you’ve known thus far: your family, your possessions, your wealth, your inheritance, your responsibilities. everything. but with the way kazuha was silently pleading you with his eyes… how could say no?
you let out a shaky breath. “i do.”
kazuha merely smiled in return, his eyes softening as if to tell you that everything was going to be alright. that he understood your choices, and that all you need to do was take this final leap of faith.
“hurry up kazuha!” beidou’s voice interrupted. a few meters away, the crux was anchored to the docks, the crew eagerly waiting to set sail. “the guards might come and take ya anytime soon!”
kazuha held your hand tightly and began running towards the docks, the two of you giggling as he helped you up on the ship. the nobleman, priest, and the crowd all watched in disbelief as you hopped onto the crux, sailing away with the samurai.
the crew cheered as you and kazuha shared a kiss of reunion, the anchor lifting from the seafloor and the two of you sailing away into the golden sun, just like you were meant to be.
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albedo
“i…see.” albedo’s eyes wander off to nowhere in particular after hearing your explanation. he blinks a few times as if to confirm that he wasn’t dreaming.
“it’s not your fault, albedo, and neither is it mine,” you added. “i hope you understand.”
for the first time since albedo was created, he feels numb. his fingertips lose grip as it all finally settles in. you’re leaving him for another man.
of course, he knows that’s not really the case. albedo understands your circumstance as well as the political powers at play, but at the end of the day, that’s what’s happening, right? you’re being wedded off to another man, which of course means you’ll have to leave him.
and when he sees you take off your ring- the ring he gave you- and put it on his desk, his heart shatters. you silently take your leave, disappearing into the dragonspine snow. albedo’s gaze is immediately pulled to the golden band on his desk, which seemed so much duller now that it wasn’t on your finger.
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projects seem more pointless than ever before, and piles of crumpled up drafts fill albedo’s trash bin. he’s taken down all the portraits of you in his home because it was too painful to bear, yet he can’t deny that he was still hopelessly in love with you. the thought of you standing at the altar with another man made albedo positively sick. and there was nothing he could do about it.
he even decided to abandon his projects to visit the city in hopes that he could catch a glimpse of you, but you never seemed to be there. he’d wander for what seemed like hours, only for it to be in vain. ‘of course,’ he tells himself, ‘they’d be busy preparing for the wedding.’
the ring in his pocket weighs heavier than before. he takes it out and twirls it in his hand, the afternoon sun reflecting off of it almost blindingly. the church bells ring in the distance, as well as the melody from the church organ.
wait… the organ is playing.
albedo clasps his hand around the ring tightly before frantically running up the stairs towards the cathedral. the scent of flowers fills his nostrils as he makes his way past the statue of barbatos and climbs the final flight of stairs until he’s met with the wooden doors of the cathedral.
he won’t lose you. he can’t lose you.
albedo’s hands feel heavy as his palm rests flat against the door. once the organs stop playing, the faint voice of a priest could be heard from outside. he can hear the nobleman say his vows, then you. his flat palm turns into a fist as he contemplates what to do next. he’s never liked crowds, nor has he ever liked being the center of attention. this could certainly ruin his reputation, and hell, the clan you’re getting married to might even get him fired but-
the thought of you being by his side again gives albedo more than enough courage to push against the doors.
“does anyone object to this wedding?”
with one strong push, the doors swing open. sunlight spills into the cathedral and forms a path of light leading to you. and dear lord barbatos, you look breathtaking.
albedo watches as you turn around in confusion. the ring you were holding in one hand clatters to the floor, echoing down the hall.
though albedo had planned on walking towards you, he couldn’t help but start running down the aisle. panting, he turns to the priest. “i object this wedding. i am their rightful lover, am i not?”
you step down from the altar, your hands reaching to caress his face and gently wipe the sweat from his forehead. “even after everything i told you… you still came. i tried so hard to hurt your feelings, so why are you here?”
despite the tears pooling in your eyes, you’re smiling. and that’s all albedo needed to see. “i must be going insane, y/n. i’m not one to act like this.”
he kneels down right then and there, holding up the ring with two of his fingers. “will you marry me?”
you take a moment to look down at albedo, who’s kneeling before you in a silent plead. the faint bags under his eyes are proof enough that he’s missed you. your family would hate you for this. doing this would mean to be shunned and disowned from your clan. the support you once had would dissipate in an instant. albedo might be put in danger as well. but you’d rather have nothing and albedo rather than everything but albedo.
“yes,” you said before sliding the ring on your ring finger, right where it belonged. you grab albedo’s arm and run out the cathedral, much to the protest of your family sitting at the pews.
you skip down the steps in a hurry before turning your head to see albedo smiling softly. you’re dolled up, and the afternoon glow of the sun hits your face just perfectly. and with his ring resting on your finger, albedo can’t help but simply adore you.
‘you are killing me softly,’ he thinks, ‘yet you seem to be the only thing keeping me alive.’
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lazarusemma · 6 months
Text
Nov 6 - Cas is
Nov 11 - He’s
Nov 18 - Sam says Mia says journaling helps. Sure.
Nov 19 - Should’ve been me.
Nov 20 - Sam, if you’re reading this thing, I’ll kick your ass.
Nov 21 - Spaghetti for dinner. Cas still dead. Journaling still stupid.
Nov 24 - I should’ve said
Nov 25 - Should’ve told him.
Nov 26, Thanksgiving - Not a whole lot of thanks around here. Thanks for dying in front of me, man. Thanks for saying all that. Thanks for disappearing again before I
Nov 30 - C not back.
Dec 5 - 1 month. C gone. J quiet. S annoying.
Dec 6 - Least Sam’s alive.
Dec 8 - [drawing of Castiel, half sketched]
Dec 10 - Not much of a friggin’ artist huh.
Dec 26 - No miracle.
Dec 31 - Gonna be another year without 
2021
Jan 1, New Year’s - Midnight alone. You should be here. You should
Jan 2 - I should’ve
Jan 5 - 2 months
Feb 5 - 3 months since I should’ve fucking kissed you.
Feb 28 - If this was a leap year man I bet you’d be back tomorrow you always did shit like that surprised the hell out of me.
Mar 1 - So it goes.
Mar 2 - S thought the library here had Vonnegut. Didn’t.
Mar 5 - 4 months Went to get a library card in town.
Mar 11 - “And I asked myself about the present: how wide it was, how deep it was, how much was mine to keep.”
Mar 30 - Sam might have a hunt for us. Don’t know if
Mar 31 - Turned it down. Passed it to Jody’s crew.
Apr 1, April Fool’s - Real funny C. Joke's over. Come back already.
Apr 9 - There’s things I can’t say things I’ve never been good at saying but you gotta know
Apr 29 - He didn’t know he didn’t know he didn’t know he didn’t
May 5 - You died not knowing, you asshole. 6 months and you’re not back so I can’t tell you.
May 6 - You missed Star Wars day, you know.
May 7 - Didn’t even Han you. Well I didn't know did I.
May 8 - Did I?
May 9 - Maybe I
May 26 - “How nice — to feel nothing, and still get full credit for being alive.”
June 5 - 7
July 5 - 8
Aug 5 - 9
Aug 6 - What if you don’t
Aug 10 - You missed my birthday. S’s too. J’s.
Aug 11 - If you can hear me
Aug 12 - What would he even
Sept 5 - Nearly crashed the car today. S had to drive. Banged up my head leaning on the window in the backseat like a kid. 10
Sept 6 - Researching.
Sept 7 - Ain’t fair you missed a whole year. Gonna have a lot of catch up to play when
Sept 8 - …when we get you back.
Sept 18 - Been 12 years. You believe that, Cas? Since I came back. Since you brought me back. Guess I hoped today would be the magic bullet to getting you back. Like you’d tip your head at me and say Hello Dean. And I’d tell you how I raised you from perdition. Whatever. Just a day I guess. Universe doesn’t care it’s our anniversary
Sept 19 - Still gonna say it though. When it works.
Oct 5 - 11. It’s gonna work
Oct 31, Halloween - Never got to put you in a dumb matching costume. Next year though.
Nov 4 - Can’t sleep. Sam says time is powerful magic or some shit like that. Says an anniversary can have echoes. So we’re trying it tomorrow. God, this better work. Cas, you hear me? We’re coming for you. I’ve been praying all year and I’m hearing nothing back. I’ll tell you tomorrow. Gonna get this stuck mouth of mine to make good. It’s just the words, even on paper, they don’t—Tomorrow though, tomorrow I’m telling you everything. Promise.
Nov 5 - Today.
Nov 6 - !!! 🙂🙂🙂🙂
^ heh. check out this dork
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octoberclidan · 3 months
Text
Can't Say No to You
Request: Could I request one with Sam and Dean (they are all best friends and either Sam or Dean has a crush on y/n; you can choose who!) where they all had just gotten back from a hunt and y/n decides to take a shower and then clean up a little bit around the bunker, and then while she is doing the dishes she’s listening to music on a speaker and she dances/sings along to the music (any choice of music). The boys catch her.. something like that? Sorry it’s such a long request I’ve been trying to look for someone to write this idea :))
Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader
Masterlist
Story:
"I am very much looking forward to getting home", [Y/N] sighed from the passenger seat in the Impala. Dean was driving, as usual, and he nodded in agreement. It had been a quick enough hunt, but the drive back had been a long one, and they were all looking forward to a rest.
"I'm just looking forward to being able to stretch my legs since someone stole my spot", Sam said from behind Dean, and [Y/N] looked around to smile sheepishly at him. "And someone else", he flicked Dean on the back of his head, "let them".
"Hey", Dean reached around to rub the back of his head. "That someone just saved both our asses back there. She can sit up front if she wants".
"Mhmm, she can have whatever she wants, because that someone else can't say no to her". Sam sat back and crossed his arms, and [Y/N] giggled as he reminded her of a child throwing a tantrum.
"Sam, are you saying that you can say no to me?" [Y/N] asked him. He mumbled something and looked out the window. She caught Dean's eye and they shared a quiet laugh at Sam's expense, before she turned up the music and the three of them listened to it for the rest of the ride home. Truth was, neither of the boys could say no to her, because they both had an above-average soft spot for her. Dean's soft spot just may have been slightly bigger and may have run deeper than Sam's, but she had both of them wrapped around her finger, and they knew it.
***
[Y/N] announced that she was taking a long, hot shower first as soon as she got out of the car in the bunker's garage. The boys watched her almost skip off towards the bathroom as they pulled their hunting gear out of the car. "She's gonna be the death of you", Sam chuckled as he closed the trunk.
"What?" Dean asked, pulling her bag up over his shoulder and grabbing his own.
"When was the last time she carried her own bag in from the car?"
"She hurt her arm on the hunt", Dean shrugged, starting to walk out towards the bedrooms.
"You mean that scratch on her elbow? She lost what, two drops of blood? Maybe you should go find her and stitch her up", Sam said as he caught up with Dean.
"Yeah, and who was it that drove to not one, not two, not three, but four different grocery stores last week because we were out of her favourite ice cream?" Dean chuckled and Sam paused for a moment in contemplation before sighing.
"She's gonna be the death of both of us".
***
Later in the evening, Dean was in his room, lounging on his bed and scribbling down some notes in his journal about how the hunt had gone, when he heard music playing. Not just any music, but one of his favourites, Ramble On, a song that made it on to nearly every one of his mix tapes. He closed his journal and tossed it to the end of his bed before getting up and wandering out of his room, following the sound of the song. He stopped outside the entranceway to the kitchen. There she was, one of his cassette players set on the counter beside her, while she was cleaning up some dishes that they'd left behind before the hunt. He watched as she swayed her hips from side to side and nodded her head in time with the beat, and he crossed his arms and smiled as he listened to her humming along. He leaned against the entranceway and watched in adoration, the attraction he felt for her was just different to other women, he couldn't quite name it though.
The song had ended and the next one started playing when he felt a nudge on his shoulder, and he looked over to see Sam chuckling and shaking his head, watching her too. "How is she so carefree, when we hunt monsters for a living?" He asked quietly, and Dean shrugged, thinking about it for a minute.
"I think she just makes time for it. You know, time to just not worry about monsters and demons, just be a girl, listening to music, and screw everything else".
Sam looked at his brother, who's eyes were still glued to [Y/N]. He'd seen desire in Dean's eyes before when talking to attractive women, but this was more than just desire. Sam knew [Y/N] was special to Dean. He turned around to walk back towards his room, but stopped to pat Dean on the back and leaned in towards him. "Tell her how you feel", he said, not waiting for Dean's response and leaving the two of them alone.
Dean waited a moment longer, enjoying the sight in front of him, before he pushed himself off the doorway and stepped down into the kitchen. He walked up behind her and smirked to himself before leaning close to her ear and whispering "Boo". She yelped and twisted around to slap him in the face with a scrubbing brush and frowned as he laughed at her reaction.
"You scared the shit out of me, Dean... Jesus", she shook her head but gave him a small smile as she realised she'd just wet half of his face with her attack. "Sorry", she reached behind her to drop the brush into the sink and grab a towel, and lifted it up to dab his face gently. He studied her face as she did so, and he felt a warmth inside him as she concentrated on the task. She was about to turn around and put it back when he took it from her.
"You have suds on your forehead", he grinned as he started to wipe her face too, and he laughed as she blushed in embarrassment. He threw the towel behind her when he was done, and then hooked his thumb under her chin to tilt her face up towards him, looking to see that he hadn't missed anything. He tucked her hair behind her ear and let his hand stay on her cheek, feeling the warmth from her blush. She closed her eyes and leaned into his touch, humming quietly in content.
"How long were you watching me for?" She asked, opening her eyes and looking up at him. Now it was his turn to blush.
"You uh, knew I was there?"
"I'm a hunter, I'm always aware of my surroundings", she smiled up at him. "I don't mind, I like watching you too".
"You do?" He raised an eyebrow at her.
"Mhmm", she nodded. "I like watching when you work on Baby. You know, when you have your sleeves rolled up".
"Really? Why is that?"
"You're nice to look at", she said, looking up into his eyes.
"Yeah... yeah so are you", he said, lowering his hand from her cheek to her neck, wrapping around the back of it. They were standing very close together now, [Y/N] leaning against the counter and Dean's hips pressing into her stomach.
"What would you say if I asked you to kiss me?" She asked, her forwardness raising Dean's eyebrows.
"Well", he chuckled, "you already know I can't say no to you". She grinned up at him as he leaned down, and slowly but firmly, with purpose, pressed his lips to hers. They closed their eyes as [Y/N] wrapped her hands around his waist and Dean held her face between his hands. They fit together perfectly. He broke the kiss for a moment, keeping his eyes closed and leaning his forehead against hers. It was now or never. "[Y/N]... I uh.. I'm not really sure how-".
"I know", she cut him off. "I like you too". Relief flooded through him and he immediately kissed her again. It was like she transfered some of her carefree thoughts to him in that moment, as all he could think about was her, and how happy she made him. Sam was right, she was going to be the death of him, and he welcomed it.
The end
Dean Winchester taglist: @123passwort @janineb86 @k-slla @lyarr24 @candy-coated-misery0731 @jackles010378 @hobby27 @pizzagirlxnsfwx @itburnslikehelltobevega @queenie32 @livingdead-reilly @vmaier12 @littlemadamred @darthysfanfic
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erospandemos · 5 months
Text
Winter's mission
Aespa Winter x Reader
Winter finds your secret diary and most importantly, your secret bucket list. Upon the discovery, she decides to fulfil every possible desire. The problem, however, is that every aspiration revolves around Winter herself.
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Minjeong and you agreed to do a marathon to watch the whole drama you had both been saving up to watch. Your friend came to your house right before lunch so you could start eating with the first episode. It was just like the other times: she promised she wouldn’t get too invested and after two episodes she’d start screaming from frustration when the main leads were this close to kissing but backed away. You’d be laughing and she’d be yelling at you because it was a serious matter.
In the late afternoon, Minjeong got hungry. She begged you to get her favorite snack, the pepero sticks. You bought them two weeks ago and put them somewhere in your kitchen but didn’t remember at all. Still, your friend wanted one thing and one thing only. You tried to refuse but when she showed you her googly eyes and puffed her cheeks, you gave in. She was just too cute.
So you stood up and reluctantly made your way to the kitchen.
However, you made a big mistake by leaving the room without checking the stuff on your table, most notably your diary. Minjeong saw it clearly, the weathered journal peeking out from under a pile of books on the bedside table. She knew it wasn’t a notebook because she’d been your friend long enough to have memorized all your preferences and you were too cheap to buy such a nice diary.
Curiosity piqued, she hesitated for a moment to think if she should do it or not. She chewed her lower lip, with a light sense of guilt. You were gone to find some hidden and forgotten snack, so it should have been long enough—she had enough time. The more she waited, the more dangerous it was. 
Minjeong made up her mind. She lifted the books and took out the notebook. She sat cross-legged on your bed, ready to reveal your secrets. As she contemplated opening it, a rush of adrenaline hit her veins, causing her heart to quicken and her muscles to tense up. She hasn’t even read a single letter yet but sweat was already dripping down her back.
“I probably shouldn't be doing this, but... what's the harm?” she whispered to herself, sighing deeply. “Okay, just a peek. It won’t hurt anyone.”
Minjeong took one last deep breath, her fingers trembling slightly as she started to open the diary. The creak of the leather seemed to echo in the room, she was alone. She started reading the entries, a mix of doodles, random thoughts, and personal reflections. 
Some of the pages only had silly ramblings like how you noticed a game’s sale too late and had to pay 5 dollars more. Minejong giggled lightly but the adrenaline was still there. Her breathing became shallow, her gaze scanning the words on the page. As she flipped through the pages, she stumbled upon an entry that caught her off guard.
She raised her eyebrow as she started reading it: 
SATURDAY 21 OCTOBER, 2023 I’m pretty sure Minjeong is playing with my heart. She’s been acting a lot more touchy lately. She was hugging my arm, hugging me and constantly touching me. She hugged me before as well since we’re friends but it just feels different these days. It’s probably because I’m a boy and she’s a girl. Even if we’ve been friends for a long time, she’s too cute for me to ignore. I think I like her. My heart beats faster when she’s around. I get nervous and fidgety. I’ve never felt like this before. It’s quite weird.
Winter's cheeks flushed with a mixture of surprise and excitement. Her curiosity took over her, she had to know. She had to know more. 
TUESDAY 7 NOVEMBER, 2023 I almost had a heart attack when I saw Minjeong with someone else. They were acting so friendly and I just felt my heart shrink. I’m not attractive compared to them. Maybe I should go to the gym. But that wouldn’t change my face, would it? Dear Diary, I really really like her.
“Wait, this is all about me?” Minjeong whispered to herself. She skimmed through the stupid entries and found even more pages about herself. She covered her mouth, blushing madly. “Oh my… I had no idea.” She couldn’t help but smile and continue flipping through the pages.
TUESDAY 14 NOVEMBER, 2023 Minjeong is back at it again. I’ve met her eyes a couple of times today and it was simply enchanting. The way her face lit up when our eyes connected mate my heart skipped a beat. She looks honest. Happy and amazing. I wish I could see her eyes every day, see every feeling in her pupils, knowing she wouldn’t be afraid to hide anything from me. Of course, I’d do the same. Minjeong is already a great friend, she’d be a great girlfriend as well. I thought about confessing for the first time. It was really a stupid thought. There is no way someone like her would accept me. I’m just a bum. I don’t even like myself, why would she? Eventually, someone will come and take her away, I just have to accept it. I love you, Minjeong.
WEDNESDAY 22 NOVEMBER, 2023 Am I a pervert for looking at Minjeong’s legs? My eyes were glued to her thighs. Maybe for a couple of minutes. Yeah, that’s definitely too much.
Minjeong glanced down at her shorts and bear legs and suddenly she felt too exposed. She regretted wearing such revealing clothes.
MONDAY 27 NOVEMBER, 2023 I want to love Minjeong properly. She’s such a perfect girl. I want her to feel loved. I’d cuddle and hug her a lot if she was my girlfriend. I daydreamed in class instead of listening to the literature lesson and this thought came to me: Minjeong backhugging me. That’s it. That’s the thought. It was enough to make me a blushing mess. Dear Diary, I have a problem.
Minjeong didn’t feel exposed anymore, she just felt warm and flustered. “You silly…” Minjeong said. She glanced around, making sure no one was watching, then hugged the diary close to her chest. “I never knew you felt this way…”
Fearing that you might be coming back, Minjeong thought that she had read enough and it was time to put it away. She just stood up and was about to put the diary back on the desk when a piece of paper fell out. It looked like it was sandwiched between the hardcover and the last page. She picked it up from the ground and read it.
BUCKET LIST Go on a date with Minjeong (skating?) Watch the starry sky Touch Minjeong’s cheeks Top marks Try skiing Confess Kiss MinHold Minjeong’s hand
Minjeong didn’t have the time to put it away when she heard your steps. She just stuffed the diary under the books and kept the paper in her pocket.
Minejong quickly recollected herself. She straightened out the few messy strands and the wrinkled clothes. She took a deep breath and shook off the agitation, anything could have been suspicious in your eyes. You weren’t dumb—although you weren’t exactly smart either—so Minjeong had to be extra careful. That said, she had to think of a way to put the little paper back in place because surely you would have noticed the next time you were going to write about how fantastic the latest wrestling match you watched was.
“Here you go,” you said, throwing Minjeong the box of pepero. “You had me looking everywhere for those… fortunately they were still good.”
Minjeong smiled, picking up the box from her lap, a natural grin on her small lips. “Thank you, you’re amazing.”
You had no words to reply but only another smile. You exhaled, letting your body drop lifeless on the bed, beside your friend. The episode was still at the 26:56 mark, and you were recollecting what happened previous to the still frame.
“Oh, by the way, I also got a bag of chocolates,” you said. You took the plastic bag you left on the corner of the folded covers. It was full of those little bite-sized chocolates you’d buy to decorate your tables in the living room when someone was coming over during the winter; or for a bunch of kids. But you got the smaller version, which also cost a couple of bucks more because it was of “fine quality”.
“No way!” she said, letting go of the pepero, forgotten like it never meant anything to her. You looked at the Oreo-looking box and blinked a few times. Why did it feel so relatable?
“You know I love chocolate!” she exclaimed.
“Yeah, that’s exactly why I bought it,” you said. 
When you pressed the space bar on your laptop and the episode restarted, the room fell into a comfortable silence. You could only hear the dialogues coming from the speakers and Minjeong cutely munching on her peperos. You were grinning widely, having more fun staring at the hamster beside you than the scenes on the screen themselves.
Minjeong on the other hand, wasn’t exactly happy. Sure, the joy from her discovery was still lingering in her mind but so was the shock. The crunchy sticks of chocolate and biscuit took the roles of her nails, on which she nervously munched without stop, box after box. She would steal glances at you from time to time, and seeing you smile so happily, laughing and passionately talking to her, made her feel things she had never felt before.
She wasn’t sure if it was indigestion or butterflies in her stomach, but the thing was, Minjeong couldn’t focus on the screen at all. Her mind was still processing the revelations from the secret diary, she tried to act nonchalant, and fortunately, you couldn’t see her well, but her cheeks were betraying a faint blush.
“The cat is so round, it looks like a bag of potatoes, don’t you think?” you laughed.
“Y-yeah,” she whispered. Winter cleared her throat, “So, what do you think will happen next in the drama?”
“What do you mean? They’re like—they’re gonna kiss. Look at the romantic tension. I bet it’s gonna be a cliffhanger.”
“Right, right…” Minjeong continued to stare at the screen. Didn’t the protagonists kinda look like you and her…? She swore they were very similar at that moment. Somehow she could see herself in the shoes of the girl, while you could have been the protagonist, with that manly shoulders and features—ehem—you had the same eyes. Yes, that’s exactly what Minjeong was thinking, or at least, that’s what she wanted to think.
The protagonists, Ji-hoon and Soo-mi, stood close, their eyes filled with emotions, concealed, to the point of overflowing. Just like her and you.  Ji-hoon tenderly reached out, cupping Soo-mi's face in his hands. With a soft smile, he gently brushed a loose strand of hair from her forehead, his touch lingering. His fingers looked very gentle, you always have been gentle too, maybe if it was you doing, it would feel… 
“Minjeong.”
“What?!” The girl squirmed lightly, suddenly feeling overwhelmingly self-aware. The romantic scene felt really closer than usual and her facade was slowly falling.
“I think it’s about to happen,” you said, still keeping your eyes attached to the screen. “They’re gonna kiss, I feel it.”
“Uh,” Minjeong started, terribly awkward. “These romantic scenes are always so... uh, intense, right?
“What do you…” you turned around and saw her heated cheeks. You looked at her and raised an eyebrow. The corner of her mouth twitched. “You're blushing, Minjeong. Are you sure you're okay?”
“Me? Blushing?” she fumbled. “No, I'm perfectly fine. It's just... you know, the drama.”
On the screen, the air crackled with tension as Ji-hoon kept cupping Soo-mi's face, his eyes searching hers for consent. Without words, their lips finally met in a tender yet passionate kiss. Time seemed to stand still as the world faded away, leaving only the sweet symphony of their hearts and the intoxicating warmth of the embrace.
Minjeong was watching everything but the kiss. 
“You're not usually this flustered,” you observed. Minjeong’s behavior was really weird. You looked back at the screen and it all looked normal. They were in their slowed-down shot with the ballad in the background.
“Yeah, well, it's just a really good episode,” she said, avoiding eye contact at all costs. You tried to look at her by bending down and tilting your head but likewise, she turned around to avoid you. It looked strange but you just continued to watch the drama, accepting her answer.
As the episode concluded, Minjeong heaved a silent sigh of relief. She attempted to divert attention by reaching for more snacks, hoping to distract both herself and you from the lingering awkwardness.
You continue to the next episode. 
You turned around and tried to get one of the snacks that were on her side. As you stretched, your hand brushed against Minjeong’s thigh. At the touch, she jolted with a loud gasp. It was like you sent a shock through her body.
“Oops, sorry about that,” you said apologetically, retrieving the box to your side.
“N-no problem at all,” she stammered.
You continued to watch without thinking much of it but Minjeong was completely on the edge. When you shifted and adjusted yourself, your leg would accidentally brush against hers. Or when you wanted to take the water bottle and you’d hug her shoulder by mistake. The blush on her cheeks continued to grow and she started to want to get out of there.
Your touches continued, all the ones that you were both accustomed to before, now sent a ripple of flustered nerves through Minjeong. 
Eventually, the episodes ended and you came to the end of the drama. Minjeong’s nerves finally relaxed. You helped her gather her things and after chatting for a while, you bid her goodbye. You insisted on bringing her home, especially since it was quite late but she didn’t want to hear any of it and ran outside.
Minjeong slept well that night. She had all sorts of dreams and fantasies—was someone in the hallway, they’d think an actress was rehearsing for her future role. When she woke up, however, it was another story. Thanks to the newly found clarity of mind, the realization hit her harder than ever.
You liked her.
You! You.
You liked her.
Minjeong sighed and sat up on the bed.
She liked you.
Yes, she.
She liked you.
Now she had two options: either ignore it, act like nothing happened, which was both the easiest and hardest choice she could take; or deal with it. Minjeong didn’t like the idea of ignoring what she found. It would be like playing with your feelings. Really, you confessed indirectly, she has read all of your honest words, letter by letter, and now knew all of your feelings. You confessed to her. 
But she also didn’t want to talk to you about it. Because, well, it was embarrassing. 
What if you didn’t feel ready for a relationship? Maybe your journal was an outlet for your stress where you poured out all of your feelings knowing full well you couldn’t be with her.
Maybe it wasn’t a journal, maybe it was a fictional diary that you were writing. Like some sort of diary of a wimpy kid but for lovers.
Maybe you were writing about another girl. You knew that someone could have found your diary, just like Minjeong did, so you used another name. You could have been in some sort of Romeo and Juliet type of affair and the repercussions could have been deadly.
Minjeong was just making stuff up at this point. Let’s face it, you were just a normal person and what she read were real journal entries. 
She sighed heavily. “Why?! Why did I…” she yelled. Minjeong closed her eyes and remembered your words—how sweet they were, how honest and meaningful—then shook her head. “It’s better this way.”
The piece of paper was still on the desk, crumbled and waiting. She got up and held it in her hand, skimming through your bucket list again.
BUCKET LIST Go on a date with Minjeong (skating?) Watch the starry sky Touch Minjeong’s cheeks Try skiing Top marks Confess Kiss MinHold Minjeong’s hand
She just ignored your last desire—the crossed-out line was still pretty readable but it was too embarrassing right now. You have helped her a lot until now, making most of the dreams from her bucket list come true. Yet, she has never had the chance to pay you back. Minjeong thought carefully and realized that this was the perfect occasion. She liked you so she would have liked it too and if you didn’t want to get into a relationship with her, at least she could fulfill a couple of your desires.
Minjeong clutched the paper with determinatione; it was her mission.
Objective 1: Secure the date
When Minjeong made up her mind and got up, two steps from the door of the room, she realized one thing: she had never been on a date. Such a pretty girl like Minjeong should have been asked out at least ten times by now. Especially since she wasn’t exactly shy or intimidating. And truly she had been asked out, but she never accepted. She’d say she had to focus on her studies, or that she wasn’t ready, or that it wasn’t the age for that kind of thing.
Minjeong turned while holding her chin, her eyebrow furrowed in deep thought. She had a location—the skating ring—that was a starter. But now, what do you do on a date? Minjeong tried to recall all the dramas she had watched: maybe she’d get some sort of idea. She has watched plenty of shows, surely there was something useful.
Characters would usually kiss each other ‘accidentally’ for example. Minjeong tried to imagine the scene: you and her walking in the frozen streets, her tripping and falling in your arms… some kids bumping into you, your lips brushing against her in a split second. Minejong started to blush terribly. “No, no, no, that’s not good,” she shook her head to get the thought out of her mind.
She was definitely overthinking this. You probably didn’t know any better than her and couples don’t really prepare that much before a date—it had to be natural. Minjeong decided to call you. There was a skating ring opened in the city during that period so that was the right occasion. 
She gripped her phone, inhaled and exhaled. “Just hanging out,” she pointed out. “That’s right, don’t stress Minjeong, it’s just a hangout between friends.” 
After Minjeong decided what to say and prepared all the possible dialogue options, which took about half an hour, she dialed your number and called. She couldn’t even calm her mind that you already picked up.
“Hello?” you asked.
“Hey,” Minjeong answered.
“Oh, Minjeong, how are you? Why are you calling me?”
“Well, I’ve got an idea for you.”
“Shoot.”
Minjeong swallowed her saliva. “How about we go skating at the ice rink? They opened it in the city center, I think it would be fun.”
“Skating, huh? Uhm… well, I’ve been thinking about it,” you said, you’ve been really thinking about it. It was such a weird coincidence that Minjeong asked you about it. However, “I haven’t done that in ages. Are you sure I won’t end up flat on my back?” You didn’t want to make a fool out of yourself in front of your crush.
Minjeong laughed jokingly. “Don’t worry, I’ve got your back… or, well, I’ve got your back if you do fall. But trust me, you’ll learn pretty quick.”
“Sounds tempting, but I’m not really convinced.”
“Come on, we’ll have fun. They also sell hot chocolate and crepes. I’ll buy it for you if you come!”
“Free food? Okay, you’ve convinced me. When do you wanna see each other?”
“How about Saturday? We should both be free.”
“Sounds good. Alright, thanks, see ya.”
“Goodbye.”
As soon as she hung up, Minjeong started jumping around like a maniac. She felt like she was a kid again, so excited and happy. She just forgot to tell you at what time to come. Whatever. She could have texted the time later. Plans were just going as planned.
The plans did not go as planned.
Objective 2: Find a replacement
Minjeong spent her whole morning preparing for the date. She looked at all the possible cafés and restaurants and food places you two could go to in case you got hungry. Then she looked at all the possible outfits she had in her wardrobe. She called her friend, Karina to help her decide the clothes. They ended up giggling and talking for about 5 hours about Minjeong’s story with you and Karina’s love interest. 
In the end, they decided to go for the simplest sweater and pants they could find. It was to “not hide Minjeong’s natural beauty” as Karina put it. Whatever that meant.
You met right at the entrance of the city. You were already waiting there. 
You found it hard to recognize Minjeong. She was bundled up in a big cozy scarf, a huge hat, and big gloves. The jacket was also quite thick, making her look like a snowman. You knew Karina didn’t let her go out of the house before dressing her up properly. You smiled, she looked very cute.
The both of you made your way to the ice ring talking about uni, friends, work, and so on. Being with Minjeong was always a pleasure as you could confide in each other about whatever problem or worry you had.
Hand in hand, you scrolled through the city, the subtle crunch of snow beneath your feet providing a serene soundtrack. There were a lot of people on the street. You came early but the sky was already starting to darken. 
When you reached the ice rink, you gulped. Minjeong instead, was extremely excited. You paid for the skate shoes, slipped them in, and stepped on the ice. 
The ice beneath your skates glistened brightly, it felt like ice, ready to crack, ready to swallow you in case you fell and gave in to the demons of the cold. Minjeong was still excited. She was already laughing while looking at the small kids tumble down the ice like bowling pins. 
Wrapped in the warmth of your scarf and being alongside Minjeong, provided you enough confidence and comfort to aid your attempt. You stepped slowly, your legs shaking. Your friend held your hand and guided you through the edge of the ring until you found the right rhythm to continue on your own.
Your confidence grew, maybe too much, and you tried to make a tight turn and slipped. Your heart skipped a beat and your life flashed before your eyes. Fortunately Minjeong, with lighting reflexes, reached out and grabbed you. 
“Oh my god, thank you Minjeong, you saved my life.”
“Be more careful!” she laughed.
After the incident, you started to be more careful and continued skating. 
At one point, tiny snowflakes began to fall down the sky, soft and gentle. Both you and Minjeong started smiling brightly, thinking it looked like a scene from a romance movie. It really looked like what you’ve always dreamt of, skating with Minjeong under the snow.
The snowfall intensified, turning the ice rink into a snowy spectacle. It added a layer of magic to their already enchanting evening, and you continued to skate with carefree joy, leaving behind a trail of swirling snowflakes. However, as the snowfall grew heavier, the twinkling lights began to fade, and a voice over the speakers announced the temporary closure of the rink for safety reasons.
Minjeong panicked. She couldn’t end the date this way. 
“Isn’t that a shame?” you said, walking away from the ice ring. “Well, I still had fun nonetheless, thank you for today, Minjeong.”
“Wait, wait,” she interrupted you. “Uhm, it’s still pretty early, wanna go back to my place?”
“Heh? Well, why not? Wanna order out?”
“Yeah, that’s fine by me.”
“Then let’s go.” Good job, Minjeong.
Objective 3: Look at the sky
You entered the pitch-black living room and turned on the lights. The room was well-lighted but still felt small and comfy, it probably was the darkness from outside the window. You glanced at Minjeong as she folded a blanket and tossed it over the back of the sofa. The air held a chill, a reminder that winter had firmly settled outside the confines of your makeshift refuge. 
She nonchalantly dropped a stack of DVDs onto the coffee table, the worn covers hinting at countless movie nights spent in this room. Minjeong leaned over the desk, planting her hands on the edge. Minjeong's gaze shifted to you, What do you feel like watching?"
I shrugged, my gaze scanning the room as if the answer lay hidden in the faded wallpaper. "Anything. Surprise me." She picked a random DVD, its label scratched and worn. She put the disc into the blueray reader and grabbed the remote. The sofa creaked as Minjeong plopped down, patting the cushion next to her. "Grab a blanket. It's gonna get colder."
You complied, dragging a fuzzy throw from the back of a nearby chair. You two draped yourselves in layers of warmth, settling into the groove of the well-worn sofa cushions. The silence enveloped you, a familiar companion that required no words.
Halfway through the movie, however, Minjeong looked at the sky: it stopped snowing. It was like the snow had purged all the previous filth between the clouds and smog and left it a pure black, only decorated by the glowing stars. Minjeong kept slapping at your leg and pointing at the sky until you turned around and the view stunned you.
Objective 4: Hold that hand
“Wow…” your friend whispered.
“Yep,” you said back. The two of you continued to watch the sky, while Kung Fu Panda 2 was becoming noise in the background and your conversation shifted to the sight. You raised an arm, pointing at the bright dots.
“You know, the color of a star indicates its temperature,” you said. “Hotter stars appear blue or white, while cooler ones look red.”
“How is it red if it’s colder?” Minjeong said, puzzled.
“It’s about the waves of light emitted. To put it simply, cooler stars emit less blue light so they look red.”
Minjeong smiled, “That's interesting, but you know, in astrology, stars, and their positions also play a significant role. I'm a Capricorn, ruled by Saturn, and it says a lot about my personality.”
As soon as you heard the word ‘astrology’ you sighed heavily and rolled your eyes, sliding down the sofa. Minjeong has already filled your head with that stuff to the brim. Whenever she had time or whenever she bought a magazine from the news kiosk, she’d start reading the entire thing of the signs, you don’t even remember what it was called.
“Astrology, Minjeong? Seriously?”
Your friend furrowed her eyebrows from annoyance and spoke defensively, “What? It's fascinating! Capricorns are disciplined, ambitious, and practical. I mean, doesn't that sound like me?”
“Disciplined? Sure. But practical?” you laughed. “You're the one who believes in star signs.”
“Well, you're just a typical Capricorn skeptic. But I bet you secretly find it intriguing.”
You chuckled and shook your head. You two laughed it off and the silence resumed. After a brief moment, where your breaths signed the passing of time, you noticed Minjeong’s glow in the dark. Your heart fluttered as you watched her profile against the moonlight. Sometimes you forget your true feelings for your friend, but they always come back. 
You sighed while turning back to the sky. “It's such a beautiful night, isn't it?” you whispered, masking the true meaning of your words because you weren’t really talking about the night. Both of you talked in codes, not on purpose but none of you could be honest. You were too scared of her possible answer and Minjeong was too scared to lose you.
“Yeah, it is,” she said softly. As you continued stargazing in comfortable silence, her mind swirled with a mixture of emotions. The recent revelations from your secret diary still lingered in her thoughts, and her unspoken feelings were twisting and turning inside her. 
Her hand slowly crept up near you, a subconscious action maybe, a planned incident perhaps; but it was the perfect occasion. You felt her touch and didn’t think twice to hold her hand. The initial contact, when your fingers intertwine, sends a wave of warmth through you. The touch is surprisingly intimate, it felt like a bridge between Minjeong and you. In a way, her feelings were coursing through you.
Objective 5: Spill it out
“Today was perfect,” you say. Minjeong silently watches you with a soft smile. “You know, I’ve always been dreaming of this moment. To watch the stars with you…” your air suddenly blocked in your throat, “Well, I—” “I already know.”
“What?”
“I already knew it. That you wanted to watch the stars—and that you wanted to go skating… with me.”
You opened your mouth to ask her how but Minjeong was faster and pulled out the crumbled piece of paper, the title ‘BUCKET LIST’ was still visible. You panicked, your eyes flicking between her stupidly satisfied smile and your embarrassing, horribly written list of desires.
You gulped and started talking, stuttering, mumbling every word, “S-so did you see the di-diary?”
“Yes.”
“Oh my god… I wanna die.”
“No, wait—”
“Forget everything Minjeong, no, well, you obviously can’t,” you blurted out, you didn’t know what to say anymore. “I’m sorry you had to read that. It was gross. I’m going to move out of the country, buy tickets, pack things, you’ll forget about me and I’ll start my new life—”
“I like you too!”
“What did you just say?” you stopped and looked at her with wide eyes.
Minjeong's admission hung in the air, and for a moment, the only sound between you two was the soft rustling of the crumpled bucket list paper in her hands. Your eyes widened, locked onto hers, searching for any sign of jest or misdirection, but all you found was true sincerity. Her pupils stared at you, eagerly waiting for your answer.
"You... you like me too?" you stammered, hesitant and scared that you might have heard the wrong words.
Minjeong nodded, a gentle smile playing on her lips. "Yes. I like you. I read your list, and it wasn't gross. It was... endearing. Honestly, it made my heart race a little."
A nervous laugh escaped your lips, a mixture of relief and newfound anxiety. "I thought I'd scared you away with that stuff."
Minjeong chuckled, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "Not at all. It made me realize we share the same dreams, the same desires. I've been wanting to do those things too, you know?"
The weight of uncertainty lifted, replaced by a warmth that settled deep within. You felt a connection, a shared vulnerability that made the revelation less daunting. "So... what does this mean?" you asked, your voice soft.
She leaned in, her gaze unwavering. "It means we don't have to dream about those things anymore. We can make them happen together."
A grin broke across your face, and you couldn't help but feel a surge of happiness. "Yeah, together."
Minjeong's hand found yours, and this time, it wasn't just for a casual touch but a deliberate, reassuring connection. The stars above seemed to twinkle in approval as you both sat there, hand in hand, in the quiet realization that your shared dreams weren't just fantasies on a crumpled piece of paper anymore—they were possibilities waiting to unfold.
“There’s still a last wish on that list I can fulfill…” Minjeong whispered. She took a deep breath and went for it. 
She kissed you.
Minjeong's eyes, soft and inviting, met yours, and at that moment, the world outside faded into insignificance. 
"I've been wanting to do this," Minjeong whispered, her voice a delicate murmur that hung in the space between you. Her fingers grazed the side of your face, a feather-light touch that sent a shiver down your spine. The proximity between you became charged, the magnetic pull undeniable.
You didn't need words. The unspoken agreement lingered in the air, and with a gentle tilt of her head, Minjeong closed the distance. The first brush of her lips against yours felt like the tentative caress of a butterfly's wings, a delicate exploration that spoke volumes. It was a moment of hesitancy and boldness, a dance between vulnerability and longing.
You didn’t say anything else, the look in your and her eyes understood each other perfectly and you kissed again. The first one was a quick peck, a mix of fear and sudden braveness. The second one was the overflow of your feelings, a long and deep kiss, a slow fusion of warmth and connection. 
The world outside might have continued its relentless pace, but within the embrace of that kiss, time became elastic, bending to the rhythm of your shared heartbeat. It was a stolen moment, a stolen kiss, and yet, it felt like something long overdue, as if the universe itself had conspired to bring your lips together in this tender collision.
When the kiss finally broke, your lips naturally curled into a large smile while she hid under the blanket from the embarrassment. Minjeong emerged only a moment later, red and flustered. “Uhm, I wasn’t too bad, right? That was my first kiss…”
“It was my first too, and no, it wasn’t bad. It was amazing,” you said honestly. “I just like how I dreamed.”
Minjeong and you laughed together. This was just the start of the many more desires you two would fulfil together.
Mission completed
THE END
Written, 03 December 2023 - 14 December 2023
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haikyu-mp4 · 15 days
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Yoga partner
word count; 667 – pregnant!reader
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You were a few months pregnant and every time you felt like you were adjusting to the size of your bump, it seemed to get bigger. When you found out you were pregnant, your husband, Bokuto Koutarou, had been moved to tears and there was no lack of support from him so far through the pregnancy. That’s why you weren’t afraid to communicate your troubles to him as they started plaguing your mind.
As it got more difficult to adjust to your body changing, the two of you sat down to research pregnancy activities. And then Koutarou got bored of researching, so he ended up asking someone on the team who had kids instead.
That’s how he learnt about pregnancy yoga. There were classes specifically for pregnant women, and in his excitement, Koutarou had signed you up and encouraged you to go. However, now he was looking at you with a subtle pout as you leaned on the kitchen island, not feeling as sporty as you wished you did.
“I don’t want to go. What if all the others are used to it and do super well while I can barely do anything?” you complained, pouting right back at him. This made him huff, resting his arms on his hips. Then his eyes lit up again. Oh no, an idea.
“Maybe I should go with you!”
Next thing you knew, Koutarou was helping you out of the car, adorned in the gym wear he had that most resembled yours in colour. You were laughing softly, holding his hand as he babbled about how excited he was.
When you walked inside, your laughter died down as you scanned the room. A lot of moms-to-be were staring cautiously, first at you and then at your husband who smiled and waved. You felt the anxiety creep back into you as you whispered your husband's name to alert him, but he took no notice.
“Hello, ladies! Ready for a good workout?” he called out, and it didn’t take long before the moms melted for his personality (and looks probably, but you tried to ignore that for now). In the end, he wasn’t allowed inside the class because of the women's comfort, but he gave everyone encouraging high fives while the trainer led them inside the little gym. Before closing the door behind you as you were last, you turned to him and pulled his shirt down so you could kiss him fiercely.
“That’s for being such a perfect man. I’ll see you in an hour.”
Koutarou was thrilled to see the glow back in your cheeks when you came back out. He had gone for a jog around the neighbourhood but made sure he was back before you finished. When you walked out of the class, you were conversing happily with another woman before bidding her goodbye. You made new friends! Even though you were still shy, you had asked to exchange numbers.
All of this was possible because your husband encouraged and supported you. You truly were blessed to have him and he reminded you every day how lucky you were through this constant support.
Now you even bring him into the living room at least once a week so the two of you can do pregnancy yoga by following some videos you found on YouTube. It’s great fun and Koutarou proudly documents it in the workout journal they fill out for their trainer.
7 pm Pregnancy yoga
Iwaizumi tilted his head at him curiously after looking over this month’s notes. “You’re not supposed to write your wife’s workouts.”
“We’re doing them at home now, too. Feel like it’s doing great things for my bum,” he answered, one hand on each asscheek for emphasis. Iwaizumi already regretted asking about it. Atsumu slapped one of Koutarou's hands off from behind him before staring at his butt and humming.
“Not bad. Maybe we should all do it.”
To say the least, Koutarou is very dedicated to being with you every step of the way.
masterlist
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