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kaidanalenkosprmanager · 14 days

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THE BEST OF SHENKO 1/?

The end of the world has a way of reminding you of all the things you forgot to say do. Mass Effect: Legendary Edition (2021)

#mira makes gifs ✨#kaidan alenko #sophie shepard #EDI #shenko #fshenko #mass effect #mass effect legendary edition #dailygaming #OTP: you're real enough for me #i learned i am physically incapable of creating less than like 20 gifs at a time #but shenko stonks are up right now!!#gif’ing my favorite bisexuals gives me joy 🥹#even though ME2 is dry as shit for shenko content like it’s literally the sahara desert #like a whole ass 10 minutes max of cutscenes between shep and kaidan like come on #like 2 minutes in the prologue and like 8 minutes of cutscenes on horizon #and then an email and looking at the picture in your cabin before the suicide mission #i'm so sorry y'all ME2 shenko canon is absolute shit (besides kaidan being rightfully angry on horizon) which is why we ✨ignore it✨ 🥰#but i rant about ME2 VS treatment too much so i will not write another essay about it in the tags #i will say the EDI line isn't the exact quote from the game but i think about it a lot tbf #same with the quote i borrowed from anderson too lmao (which is also a tiny bit paraphrased)#i just love EDI asking shep for relationship advice when you get to follow shep and kaidan's relationship/struggles across 3 games #and anderson's quote about all the things you forgot to do in relation kahlee to is just *chef's kiss* when you think about shenko #like whether it starts in ME1 or ME3 shenko has some really fantastic moments across the series #two characters with strong morals who realize that they're falling in love and literally start to become each other's strength??#their soft place to land?? their support when they need it?? shenko will always have my heart #also the shenko quotes you get are the most fire thing in the world #you're real enough for me?? you make me feel human?? i want to be your strength- your soft place to land?? shenko you will always be famous #I FORGOT IM GONNA FIGHT LIKE HELL FOR THE CHANCE TO HOLD YOU AGAIN TOO LIKE??#but i’ll stop ranting now bc i do that wayyy to much in my tags lol. have a good day wherever you are! <3

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mondaymelon · 6 months

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NUH UH

"nuh uh?"

is that what you'll tell the court?

is that what you'll declare to the judge??

spoken truly like a five year old fresh out of kindergarten???

do you even have the money to support yourself? do you have a single coin to pay in settling fees??

..

monsieur neuvillette will be hearing about this

#★ ˎˊ˗ melonrambles!#★ ˎˊ˗ inbox.#girlie i do not know the first thing about court trials #the fuck am i on about #idk #something about playing fontaine has made me intelligent <- blatant lie #my brain has inflated #with NOT EMPTY AIR #WITH BIG SMART BRAIN MATTER #THERE F. O R E #MY S MA R T NE S S #HAS INC R E A S E D #through the roof.#skyrocketed.#one might even say stonks #lmao #my humor is so dry

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deus-ex-mona · 2 years

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✨foolproof gacha summoning ritual✨: spamming the bf’s voice lines before rolling in the gacha—

hid the vid evidence under the cut bc the tumblr app #betrayed me

#i spammed dai’s voice lines for megu’s birthday and it worked too👀👀👀👀#and i spammed yui’s voiced lines before rolling in the current event gacha and got rio after 2 more pulls lmfaoooooo #i think it only works for fruity thlottle4 though… hmmmmmmm #just honeypre things #‘dai’ly shitpost of the day #also happy birthday dai!!!!!!!!!!!!#i ate (am still eating actually—) strawberry cake as i rolled to celebrate dai’s birthday. best boi deserves best cake!!!!#i managed to get away with it (even though it’s like 11pm here) by saying it’s an early birthday cake for myself though. ✨stonks✨

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autistic-shaiapouf · 2 years

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Local transcription service offers $50 for 8 hours of work

#high key. might see what happens with t my doc visit and then consider applying for disability bc i cant fucking do this #not in a silly oh teehee I'm not sure if im good enough for this job!! 😣#but in a very real and visceral ''my body hurts all the time from an unknown chronic condition and the jobs i can hold will either #take a physical toll on me like my previous job where it took at least a month for me to be able to sit up in bed in the #morning without feeling my back immediately seize up on me; or i will take a psychological toll that medication simply cannot fix #i just. the job market is not made for people like me and it's so frustrating to see people say to just look for things that suit me #nothing!!!! fucking nothing suits me!!!! i dont wanna look at my strong points and make myself marketable!!! reduce myself to assets!!!#i havent even done anything today besides have breakfast and my head is already pounding as it is wont to do #i just. econony.... and stonks.... i am going to start biting people i cant do this i just cant 👁 👁#hoatm rants

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aroaceofthesea · 5 months

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Ah feels so good to have the bono cultural 😊😊

#just used it for the first time 😋😋#i FINALLY have the tickets to canet rock #i even have someone to go with😋😋#its gonna be awesome theres the tyets and la fumiga and OQUES GRASSES (its been so longg)#and theres also a couple more like 31fam which i dont rlly listen to but ive wanted to try for a while #(getting into new bands is a big deal for me ok its hard so many new songs ouch)#^and mushka too (idek if i spelled it right🥶🥶) (did it have 2 as??)#gonna use it again as soon as i get confirmation from a friend that we go to the la fumiga concert album release in mayy #im paying for her this year and she will pay for smth next year #stonks🤑#<-who knows if there will be bono next year but whatever its not like i have many better things to do with 200 euros for concerts #<-says having spent almost 50 of them already and planning on 30 more plus almost 50 for canet rock next year #(but hey that means i still have like 70 euros left right)#(what am i supposed to do with all that anyway concerts are usually free)#(gracies a deu q hi ha festes majors em donen vida)#mine #life

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theophagie-remade · 1 year

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The great thing about spoken dialect is that it's less noticeable when you do ~unusual~ things with it. o be upon ye. ə be upon ye

#no one will notice that half the things you say don't end in -a if you can blend it in with the general #non-standardness of dialect. stonks #+ i speak faster in dialect than i do in standard italian so it's even less noticeable. double stonks #mytext

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musings-ofthe-unamused · 7 months

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Obey Me Headcanons

Topic: Fights

Characters: Lucifer, Mammon, Beel, Satan, Levi, Asmo, Belphie

Warnings: Angst, Lucifer being a little BITCH

Lucifer:

Getting into a fight with him hurts

He will point out every single way you need to improve yourself

And call you an imbecile while doing it

He’s just so pissed that he’s scolding you worse than Mammon

Call him a little bitch to throw him off

Start crying to make him feel bad >:D

Stonks!

Mammon:

He’s not the type to stay mad for long

Unless you’re like,,,legit making out with someone in front of him, he’s quick to apologize

But if you two happen to be in a really heated fight, he won’t necessarily be mad

Mammon acts more of a sad puppy dog

“Do you really think that?”

He gets very dejected its kinda heartbreaking

Pls apologize rn!!!

Levi:

Tsundere type of angry

“It’s not like I cared!”

He will deflect.

It’s one of the worst types of defense mechanisms

If you just leave him alone for a while

Eventually he will be so consumed with playing back the fight

That he will apologize

Feel free to flick him

Satan:

I dont wanna fight Satan

I feel like he’d slap me not that I would mind

Similar fighting style to Lucifer

He’s a little more cold and doesn’t really point out your faults

He just insults you

“Are you choosing to be this childish right now? Do you really want to fight over this?”

He’s stubborn and will totally drag out a fight

It can either end in you two awkwardly apologizing

Or not talking for weeks

Asmo:

I feel like getting in a fight with him wouldn’t be an actual fight

He’d just be super condescending

“Oh? So that’s how you feel. Cute.”

Will scoff at you (it doesn’t sound like a big deal but it is)

Gaslights

“Darling, I just don’t understand why you’re upset. I did nothing wrong.”

It will end in you storming off in tears telling Asmo that he’s a self centered ass

Only then will he slightly feel bad

(i love him it makes it sound like I don’t)

Beel:

Beel has trouble comprehending other’s feelings

He truly tries, but sometimes it’s frustrating

And when he’s frustrated, he shuts others out

“Beel, you can’t just sit there and eat. Talk to me.”

“I don’t want to.”

It’s very aggravating when the you can’t get through to you

It’s the fact that he won’t even try to understand

Either sit down and talk it through, or have one of the brothers explain it

Belphie:

Two things can happen

The first is he completely ignores you

Every time you say something he just yawns, nods his head

Or he says “I’m sorry” without even meaning it

Eventually, he’ll get so tired he’ll just go to sleep

The second thing that happens is the worst

Full on screaming match

Belphie is so fucking pissed he will start throwing insults

And maybe actual physial objects (not at you though)

If you slap him out of it, he��ll start profusely apologizing

If one of the brothers (Lucifer) intervenes, he’ll storm out of the house and disappear for days before coming back to apologize

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rhenuvee · 8 months

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Playing Animal Crossing New Horizons with Genshin Boys [Modern AU]

A/N: This is not important but I almost wrote sea bass with the characters

»»———————————-««

Treats it like Minecraft. Farms the heck out of your island for materials, and makes his own little "base" that's bordered by fences. Has enough wood, rocks, iron nuggets, etc to supply him for a year.

Razor, Bennett, Albedo, Alhaitham, Chongyun, Gorou, Kazuha, Mika, Thoma, Tighnari, Wanderer, Xiao

Chaotic. Attacks you with a net, sends you purposely cringey notes with a smelly sea bass attached, dresses like a hot dog after telling him to dress nice for a picture, probably decorates his house like a demon summoning ritual.

Childe, Cyno (does it to make you laugh), Itto, Kaeya, Lyney, Venti

Has sooo many bells... and from what?? He is your resident glucose father, always giving his bells to you to pay your debts. That 75,000 bell piano? It's yours. Really good with the Daisy Mae stonks, buys 100 turnips every time.

Alhaitham (asks you to catch a Coelacanth first), Ayato, Childe, Diluc, Kaeya

Broke. You’re the one with millions of bells. Takes so long for him to get out of the tent, and can't pay his home loans for days- but always has money for buying random things like a chair? Sometimes they have bells, but still ask you for some to annoy you. Also frequently gets scammed by Redd.

Bennett, Itto, Kaveh ("why does this feel oddly familiar..?"), Venti

Trash island. They are hoarders (honestly me). Your island's trees are still at the original random locations, along with weeds you have to pick every time, and some unknown "leaves" scattered everywhere. You say this is the reason Isabel gave your island a 2* rating but he denies it.

Bennett, Razor, Cyno, Itto, Venti

Clumsy. Always gets stung by wasps because he never takes out the net on time, falls for pitfall seed traps, and lots and lots of sea bass.

Bennett, Gorou, Itto, Kaveh

Treats it like Pokemon. Catches every single fish, bug and ocean species, completes the art gallery, every DIY. If you need something caught or made, he's your man.

Albedo, Bennett, Chongyun, Cyno, Freminet, Kazuha, Mika, Razor, Heizou, Thoma, Tighnari

Wholesome af. This one gifts you sweet letters with nice gifts, aw. Plants lots of flowers outside your houses. Always gives you things you need. Probably decorated a small little space your you two, and gives the villagers nice gifts too.

Ayato, Baizhu, Bennett, Freminet, Kaeya, Kaveh, Kazuha, Lyney, Mika, Thoma, Venti

Doesn't really play video games... but he knows you like it so he tries to understand it. He's like a tourist, following you around, occasionally getting sidetracked by random things such as villagers. He doesn't know about the mailing system (yet) so he drops off gifts for you in front of your house.

Alhaitham, Ayato, Baizhu, Diluc, Gorou, Kazuha, Mika, Razor, Thoma, Xiao, Zhongli

Villager drama enthusiast (but chaotic). You tell him about your island and the personalities of your villagers. He goes a step further by making up gossip like "_____ cannot be neighbours with _____ because he cheated on her with _____!"

Childe, Kaeya, Kaveh, Lyney, Heizou, Venti, Xingqiu

The artist. Takes Animal Crossing very seriously. Has only the best clothes and furniture, sometimes making his own custom designs. Terraformed and decorated your island to a T, and takes cute pictures with you in the museum's aquarium, fireworks festival, etc.

Kaveh, Kaeya, Kazuha, Lyney, Venti

The competitive one. Originally he thought Animal Crossing was just a cutesy game. Once you introduce him to it, it doesn't take long for him to complain about Tom Nook being a capitalist and struggling to pay his loans and complete the museum. You offer to help but he insists on doing it himself.

Itto, Tighnari, Wanderer, Kaveh

»»———————————-««

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thesmpisonfire · 4 months

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Anyway. Once again I don't think this is the end of ccForever in the server. MAYBE qForever is practically dead but this ain't ccForever leaving

Because he wants to focus on the Stonks project now, plus if he really wanted to be killed off, Eve would have been actually killed instead of locked up IN THE ISLAND and shown to still be spreading the black matter

He said he will leave qForever marked in the QSMP while he does other things. Richas also was clear to say he will save Forever and we know Ricardão and ccForever chat a LOT off stream about lore. Also, Bad and Forever planned this lore together, and Bad also haven't given up on Forever

I think he'll just take a long break before his grand return. He's an amazing villain and he wanted to play the bad guy role for a while now so give him time <3

EDIT: Also if he was actually leaving the server, he'd say way more than just about his character 😭😭😭 calm down besties <33 give him time to breath and lore to settle down post holidays :D

#qsmp

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weirdmageddon · 7 months

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I'm taking the plunge because why not:

What are some headcanons regarding small, silly things that happened during the 3 year trips on the Golden Yard and Meteor?

oh lets go i love this sort of ask. no meteor crew stuff sorry im kinda tired but

on the prospitian ship:

the crocodiles are never recovering from that shit bro. un-stonks

alchemizing sessions. probably with mundane household devices like toothbrushes or something. patterned toilet paper. davesprite absolutely remakes the sbahjifier for himself but i think he also likes to hand draw them from time to time. also john and jade alchemizing bathing suits and going swimming on lolar and hanging with the turtles. casey can come too. floaties on casey

the sbahj canon diverges. so many sbahj in-jokes exclusive to the prospitian ship. unfortunately the retcon make it so none of this ever happens :(

he’d never say it but davesprite likes it when john and jade fall asleep on him doing whatever, it makes his presence feel wanted and appreciated by the people he sacrificed his self and humanhood for good for. sorry for immediately going into davesprite but good god is he tragic. oh yeah heres more. he’s still part dave and shares the same history with john and jade that alpha timeline dave does. john gave him his shades on his 13th birthday in december 2008, he sent john the con air bunny and jade a physical copy of sbahj as furries in the mail. he is identical to alpha dave in relation to his friends before the timeline splits off. dont forget that 4/13/2009 was also his first time meeting his online friends john and jade in person, even after 4 months chronologically of sburb grinding—nearly a year with all the time shenanigans—and going back to day 1, since john and jade were dead in his timeline

tries not to cry cries anyway but only when he knows theyre asleep. pov when the weight of everything suddenly hits you (you are an emotionally repressed 14 year old)

also because he’s fucking fluffy and absolutely knows it and probably thinks to himself “yeah this is the best possible use for these otherwise pointless breast feathers” and yall already know he craves cloth mother plus probably has nesting instincts

(source)

adding on to that also i think people forget sprites are actually fucking LONG and his wingspan is fucking huge he could be a pillow and a blanket at the same time

i wrote davesprite jade cuddles and john thinking about mushrooms and davesprite thinking about how they contribute to the ecnonony

^ john toked too hard on the lowas mushrooms by accident one time

it feels like pajama parties would be a common occurence just the vibes im getting. literally jade is seen sitting on a pile of squiddles and theres plushies fucking everywhere you know they got up to plushie mayhem. do you think they ever alchemized them. look how lived in that room is they all contributed something

jade resumes gardening :) but theres no sun :( but she alchemizes some plastic plants :D but its not the same :(

canonically the imps in johns house just gave up tormenting him and started hanging out and having snacks on movie night

PENIS!

imagine looking up into the sky and seeing a giant casey the size of a planet sleep. jade resizes stuff for fun like this just to introduce some novelty to their lives

this is something

davesprite has beavis and butthead do america (1996) in his collection somewhere in his apartment on lohac

yall theyre watching johns fuckin spongebob dvd box collection. you KNOW john owns the spongebob squarepants movie (2004). and the best thing is it brings all of them together without any of them objecting. they all love spongebob

when the episode jellyfish jam comes on johns like “wow, pretty much this exact scenario happened to me with the imps.” (arthur flashback sfx)

DAVESPRITE: yeah well you didnt have a giant sound system did you

jade warps dave’s bro’s sound system from lohac and sizes it up. they put on stadium rave and the entire fucking house shakes

#homestuck #hs #davesprite #john egbert #jade harley #nannasprite

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saintsenara · 1 month

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Opinions on Tonks/Snape?

thank you very much for the ask, anon!

here's where i confess that i've got quite a soft spot for stonks as a ship - and not just because of that ship name - because it's a great vehicle for one of my favourite post-war questions: how the hell do you put a life together in peacetime if you never expected to have survived the final battle?

that this would apply to snape is obvious - it's pretty clear in canon that [much like harry] his experience of the entire period 1981-1998 is that he's following a script written for him by dumbledore which he believes [and, i suspect, hopes] will end in his own annihilation. while i don't think he imagines dying in the exact way he does [and while a hill i will die on is that dumbledore tried as best as he could to arrange things so that snape would survive], i think the only post-war survival scenario he envisions for himself is a lifetime rotting in azkaban, continuing to punish himself and consider himself unworthy of absolution for his role in lily's death.

but - perhaps more controversially - i also think that this can be said to apply to tonks. while i would absolutely reject the suggestion that she would have imagined herself dying because she was a bad mother, i think that several things she says in deathly hallows - above all her recognition that she's locked into a battle to the death with bellatrix - would lead to her sharing the view lupin's shade expresses to harry when he summons him with the resurrection stone: that the greatest act of love she can show her son is to die for a world in which he can live freely.

[and i also think - indeed i am convinced of it - that she also thinks it's her duty to die trying to off bellatrix because her decision to join the order means that andromeda and ted's safety in the first war - something voldemort can be plausibly said to grant at bellatrix's request on the proviso that they keep their heads down and their mouths shut - is forfeit in the second.]

the post-war tonks - a widow at twenty-five, navigating life as a single mother to a tiny baby, dealing with her own cavernous grief over the loss of her father and her mother's grief over the loss of her husband - can be written about really interestingly as someone who's unmoored within her new life and looking for something - anything - to anchor herself.

and a snape who survives nagini is a really interesting tool in all sorts of post-war ships [snarry and snack chief among them] in how he serves as a connection to a lost generation. and, in this case, he is the only person tonks will know who - no matter how negative his assessment of him - actually knew lupin well.

and it's so clear that tonks' relationship with lupin in canon was shaped by her searching for answers about him which he kept hidden behind the mask of his own self-loathing. i can absolutely see her being devastated at the knowledge that his death means that she finds herself with no chance of ever actually uncovering the reality of him, and i can see this leading her to snape's hospital bedside out of a desire to grasp at someone - anyone - who might help her fill in those gaps.

but tonks is also clearly very bolshy and very brave - two traits you need to help you survive grieving the loss of one love and still have room to chase after another.

she's also clearly very curious and very kind. and so i think she's the order member - other than harry - who would be most able to accept the fact that snape was on their side all along and to believe that he should be pardoned. i think snape would find that show of trust in him terrifying - obviously - and i think he'd go out of his way to push her away as a result. but she's got plenty of prior experience at dealing with emotionally constipated men...

and i think you can make a very credible case for the idea that snape must genuinely quite like tonks. i think it's often overlooked just how clever she must be to be admitted as an auror, and how one of the areas in which she would have been required to be clever was potions. she's also clearly one of the youngest people in the role, and her position as a junior auror who ends up doing far more for the war effort than many of her seniors mirrors snape's experience as the youngest teacher at hogwarts. i also think her shock at just how horrible to her snape is in half-blood prince when he mocks her new patronus can be read as evidence that, during the order of the phoenix timeline, she and snape had a cordial relationship. and cordial for snape is transcendentally fond for anyone else...

[plus, his disappointment in her being interested in lupin is clearly because she's someone he respects - if he didn't think she was far too good for lupin, he wouldn't have bothered saying anything.]

i genuinely think you can do something lovely with the two of them initially coming together because they view the other as a life raft in a world they don't think really belongs to them, but then something which looks a lot like dry - and stable - land coming into view as they realise they have more than that in common.

snape's terrified, obviously, but tonks is a woman who understands how to go with the flow. she'll follow love where it takes her - no matter the obstacles she finds in the way - and he's going to have no choice but to come along for the ride.

#asks answered #asenora's opinions on ships #stonks #severus snape #nymphadora tonks

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indigo-scarf · 7 months

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imagine if lucius actually knew a lot about the muggle world so he could extract stonks from it (like that pottermore post that says the malfoys used to mingle with muggles when it was advantageous)

and then

he starts snarkily explaining things to arthur and that turns into an enemies to lovers/friends arc

#lucius malfoy #arthur weasley #arthucius

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valiantroeagleangel · 3 months

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Jolly's alphabet

Jolly Karlsson x female reader

Bad Omen's alphabet request part 2. Jolly my dear man. This is obviously NSFW.

Mama's tag list: @circle-with-me @somewhere-diamond @malice-ov-mercy @smokeynaomi @darkhallcorner @loeytuan98 @sthnog @cookiesupplier @cncohshit @lma1986

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Let's face it, Jolly knows how to take care of someone. I think that he can be really rough during sex so he will make it up to you afterwards.

B = Body part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Maybe it's because I'm obsessed with this dude's arms and hands but I want to say his arms and hands. Fuck me they are so fucking hot so it has to be his favourite body part.

For you, ass man. Slaps your ass when you bend a little too much in front of him. And I'm pretty sure he can't say no to a nice cleavage too. That aside I think he is a pretty caring guy so he might just like to see you smile, obsessed with the way your lips curve.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

CUM INSIDE. WANTS TO FILL YOU UP. thank you.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Already have fucked a glove full of boiled pasta to masturbate. Why? I don't know, he just felt like it. Wondered how it would feel and then just did because he had this power.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

This dude is experienced. He has to be. But not in the "Omg Noah and Nicholas must be so experienced" kind of way. You know what I'm talking about and no, that's not it. Jolly is EXPERIENCED. For real, he fucking knows what he is doing and he is totally chill about it. Maybe it's because he is the oldest, something to do with maturity.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Cowgirl. He loves to see you ride him. Once again he can't say no to a nice cleavage so seeing your boobs in this position just got him STONKS. And that way he can grab your hips and push you down on him and he loves it.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He can crack a dad joke and then go full serious like nothing happened. This dude isn't scared to break character, it's more fun and intimate to him. It's the two of you so if he wants to make a cheesy joke he will but he will also make sure to fuck you in full mode just after that.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Come on, let's be real. This is bushy. He might trim it a bit sometimes but I'm sure he mostly doesn't care much.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Romantic but not in a very cliche way. He will make sure that you feel loved, that you know he cares and that he can take care of you but like don't expect him to wait for you naked on the bed with a rose in his mouth, surrounded by candles and red sheets. Or maybe he will do it but then burst into laughter because what the fuck.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Masturbate in that little thing that I don't remember how it's fucking called in English but you know it's like a fake vagina in plastic and you just fuck into it.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Back to the cum thing, he has a breeding kink. Wants to fuck you dumb and push a baby into you. HIS baby hm.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

I'm sure this dude likes to fuck you in the bathroom so he can watch your reflection and now that I'm writing it here I want to do a fic about that. Anyway, he will bend you over the sink and fuck into you like a beast as he watches you fall apart, your makeup running down your face, completely ruined.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

You know that saying that says "A hole is a hole. Men can fuck walls or corpses." Well, I hate to say that but I think that Jolly is the kind to get horny over the most random and little things.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Alright to come back to the last point I was kidding. Jolly isn't fucking corpses. But the hole in the wall...

No okay just kidding, but I don't know what would turn him off except dead people and animals maybe.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Both. Likes to eat you and likes you to eat him. He likes to fuck your throat roughly, letting your gag over him as he pushes in your mouth with both of his hands on the back of your head. Though he will also make you sit on his face and suffocate under your pussy.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

This man fucks like a beast I'm sorry y'all. He can be sensual, he can be tender and caring but it will always end with him grabbing you and fucking into you senselessly.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Likes them and will do it often. I think he likes the idea of quickly getting you off but not enough for you to be good to go. So he will fuck you quickly before a show or before leaving. Letting you on that high but not enough for you to come down. He will leave you horny and think about how wet you might be all day just for him to fuck you in the night.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

I'm pretty sure he is ready to experiment. When you arrive to the point where you are fucking boiled pasta you can try a lot of things.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

I said it before but that dude is horny okay. He fucks and he fucks for a long time, many rounds if he wants to.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Oh he has toys, for you, for him, for everybody. Fuck that little plastic vagina I told you about but will also fuck you with a dildo if he wants to (or any other toy).

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Unfair in the way that he likes to get you aroused, like really aroused before fucking you. he wants you to mewl for him.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He groans and grunts. He is not afraid of being loud or of letting you know that he fucking likes it.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Has a thing for footjobs.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

I don't think it's THAT massive but he can still defend himself with it. It might be heavy and thick but not super long.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Horny Jolly = high sex drive.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Once you're both taken care of, he will take you in his arms and just fall asleep, snoring deeply.

#jolly karlsson #bad omens #fanfiction #fanfic #fic #headcanons #alphabet

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heartscrypt · 9 months

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Hii! I have a question about your thoughts on jamiazu.

Do you think that Azul would ever be able to confess any romantic feelings for Jamil? If so, how? And if not, would they be able to get together in any other way?

Sorry if this is a weird question, just curious.

thanks for your question! it is SO not weird at all i really enjoy stuff like this. actually i am going to go on a huge ramble that goes on a little tangent so like. LONG POST AHEAD!!!! be warned!!!!!

anyways. azul is always confessing his romantic feelings for jamil whether he knows it or not. in every interaction. because he's so damn obvious. hope this helps LOL

in all seriousness though. i really like to think that azul is kind of cursed to be a hopeless romantic despite it going against all of his pragmatic sense. i mean. he's a child of divorce who hates leaving things up to chance and he believes in getting something back whenever he gives something away. being head over heels with someone goes against his whole nature, so i think it's definitely a new thing for him. he won't recognize that his feelings are romantic right away because he'll be too busy trying to justify to himself why he's investing so much time and energy into a guy that Clearly wants nothing to do with him and won't give him the time of day. its business, guys, i swear.... stonks.....

i think once he does come to terms with it though. it starts leaking through in Every Interaction he has w/jamil. in every encounter, azul basically ends up saying I Love You without actually ever speaking it out loud. whether it's through his actions (like getting jamil gifts / offering to help out without any genuine expectation of repayment) or or his words (like implying things about them being good together / complimenting jamil excessively). things he did before he realized, but they just have so much more Weight to them now that he Knows he likes the other in a very Non-Platonic-Business-Partners way. he doesn't intend for it to have that emotional weight but its fucking impossible for him to hide and he does NOT know what to do with himself.

he keeps pushing forward regardless because some part of him hopes that his feelings will reach jamil but he also does it with the expectation that jamil will push back like he always has and that's completely fine by him because never actually directly admitting that these feelings are romantic means that the rejections also stay platonic and that is. Way easier to bounce back from. because god forbid jamil sees at who he is behind all the walls he's put up to protect his most vulnerable and emotional self and ends up hating the real azul too.

tl;dr: i don't think azul would go out of his way to make a real, honest confession of his feelings. but he's so obvious it actually hurts to watch

---

ok so. as for jamiazu get-together:

maybe im like super biased b/c im a sucker for narratives that involve jamil learning to shake his passivity and going ahead and Taking what he wants. but i always think that any scenario where jamiazu gets together has to be initiated by jamil somehow. azul can make the first move and several moves after that but jamil has to be the one to make the Final move if that makes sense.

i don't have like. one set get-together scenario but i have a couple that i like to rotate in my head sometimes. most of them involve azul being a failgirl and getting caught off guard because i think it's funny and jamil also thinks it's funny. here are two for your viewing pleasure:

azul makes a pass at jamil that is romantic-coded but could be interpreted as platonic. jamil seizes the opportunity to turn it Explicitly into a romantic thing and fluster azul to no end about it.

azul: there's a new tasting menu at the mostro lounge if you'd like to come with me and try, i'd love to see what your discerning palette makes of it ^__^!

jamil, very casually: yeah sure. why not. i'll go on a date with you

azul, who did NOT expect a yes so his head is about to explode in t-minus 5 seconds: oh, uh. that's .fantastic, actually— wait. ....DATE?!?!?;!?

jamil corners azul and admits romantic feelings first. bonus points if it's a situation where any romantic confession would be incredibly out of the blue. and the way that jamil says it is like dropping a bomb on azul

like in potions lab. azul's concentrating very hard on pouring an exact amount of a substance. jamils watching him and at some point out of nowhere he breaks the silence in between them by going "i think i like you. in the romantic sense". azul's concentration snaps immediately and he fumbles the beaker into the cauldron out of sheer WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING. it explodes in both of their faces. they both have no chance to address what jamil said because crewel is chewing them out for the next 15 minutes about lab safety. during the entire 15 minutes azul looks like he's been hit over the head with several bricks. Repeatedly. jamil's smirking the whole time though he dgaf. takes pleasure in flustering azul

anyways. im insane about these guys ♥️ if you stuck around and read the entire post im really sorry for writing so much i just have a lot of thoughts

#twst #twisted wonderland #jamil viper #azul ashengrotto #jamiazu #azujami #jamie talks #txt post #the public forum #again. sorry for the long post. oh god they make me so sicj #delusional posting tbh #the azul hopeless romantic hc is something that is very special to me #something about it is just very good. goes against his entire character but he cant help but Feel that way although he knows its irrational #also a big fan of jamiazu situationship #where jamil still insists that he finds azul insufferable and azul calls jamil his future business partner #but they also make out on a regular basis. so obviously they're both not telling the truth #so fucking funny to me. but thats not what you asked so ill elaborate on that eventually on another post

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writingforatwistedworld · 2 years

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hello ! can i req self aware jamil , malleus , and kalim with a gn s/o who likes to collect antique dolls ? like they get a new doll and immediately open the app to show it off to them , rambling and what not ? thank you !! <3

Self-aware au

I do not take any responsibility for you reading this no matter which age group you are from!

WARNINGS: Yandere themes, kidnapping, obsession, possessiveness, unhealthy relationship, violence

Kalim Al-Asim/Jamil Viper/Malleus Draconia-Player collects antique dolls

A nice hobby you have! It might not be so nice for the budget of the Al-Asim family....

But let us start from the beginning

Kalim loves everything that makes you happy

Whether that is your favorite food, book or in this case, your dolls

And believe me when I tell you that he feels overjoyed whenever he sees you showing him them

Oh not because he likes those dolls

More because of your smile

Uh... this only goes well in the beginning

Kalim, and I'm not joking, gets jealous of dead material which is formed to resemble a small human

If he were to be able to enter your world then he would smash them to pieces

So um... maybe only buy one once a month? To keep the jealousy level low...

But since those threats bind him to his world he isn't able to do anything. Unless...

How about buttering you up with dolls??!

Since that day there is a whole room filled just with antique dolls in his castle

One servant quit because they found their eyes too spooky when they were passing by at night

However, once Jamil had to clean up a pile of broken porcelain after Kalim threw one of them against a wall screaming something along the lines of “Curse them!” (Jamil was scared of Klaim for the first time in his life)

You now have the choice, keep on showing him those dolls and make it worse (making him possibly hire somebody to summon you into his world) or keep low an keep your freedom

The choice is up to you (choose freedom!!!)

Jamil is a much safer one

So one day she found out that you liked dolls, so what?

He doesn't get jealous

Oh no, he is genuinely happy for you

Not everyone has hobbies that make them so happy

He would also prepare some for you if you ever were to enter their world but... money doesn't grow on trees...

So he has to be satisfied with seeing your smile every time you show him a new one

He might just gets way too protective of dolls from now on...

Some first year say g they are lame?

Suddenly they don't remember the day before they woke up in their room in their dorm with wound all over themselves

And they might will be accused of behaving violently

Eye contact can be a dangerous thing is all I'm saying in this case

Voicelines will also start to get weird

These last few days he has started to talk about how he learns how to make and fix dolls

But this is just a funny little update, right?

Just don't worry about the small rumors you sometimes hear about him whenever a NPC is talking to another NPC

Something about Jamil being weird...

But nah, that can't be, right??!

This one might be the one who is the most happy but also most dangerous one

Happy about your hobby 2.0

The thing is, Malleus probably has really old antique dolls back home

Probably every Fae child but shhh we don't talk about that

Like Kalim he also starts a doll collection

Just with the difference that you have a small chance of not being summoned into their world if we are talking about Kalim whilst in his case this is guaranteed

But let's turn out gazes at something else for now

So, when you first showed him a doll he was confused

Weren't dolls out of fashion these days?

But he befriended the idea of you liking such a thing very fast

He isn't very judgemental, just a nuclear bomb on two legs

Where were we moments ago... ah yes, that summoning bussiness

There has been a huge increase in doll stonks

Rumors say that the reason for that is the sudden disappearance of many old dolls

They are in that castle but I get the feeling that once someone or something enters that place they won't leave for a long time

Malleus just wants you beside him and if a doll collection will make you even happier then he will happily buy every single one

But for now please enjoy your hobby!

Who knows how long you still have the freedom to run into a antique store to buy these...

Wait is Malleus drawing some weird symbols on the floor while muttering something weird??! Reader, run! (I don't think that helps but you never know...)

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disfrutalakia · 4 months

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Funnily enough one thing that comforted me about cc Forever going on hiatus was remembering he was getting a bit burnt out on QSMP simply bc it has been all rp and no major projects hes passionate about. Like yes he had the voting system and the moon house, but I remember him saying theres nothing he NEEDS to make or NEEDS to do bc he already had everything so I think in Stonks, he will be able to redstone and create mod to his hearts content nd start new projects like he's been lacking in QSMP bc I'm parasocial and like seeing my fave ccs happy and having fun yk? He needs the mechanical minecraft enrichment and he can rp in Stonks as well if he wants so I will happily watch it even if I dont understand portuguese LOL

Yeah, the whole mods thing was because he thinks the server doesn't have new things to do and that it's a bit boring (?) Because of that lack of things

But even then the rp was never a complaint for him, because he enjoys it a lot nowadays and has talked about mixing that with other things he enjoys doing like building and redstone!

#asks

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