#this piece took me like 4-5 months i'm dying

[goopinko]

Y'all like PMD?

#my art #pokemon #pokemon mystery dungeon #pmd #sharpedo bluff #this piece took me like 4-5 months i'm dying

[whatudottu]

If I thought the Transformers (Aligned) timeline was convoluted, god the Trollhunters timeline is fucked beyond all hell, and worse of all because they use Merlin - bloody MERLIN - as a character that created the amulet there's an upper limit of time Trollhunters have existed before, heck even Myrddin Wyllt his welsh name (and canonical alternate name in the show), Merlin stops being the Merlin from human myth and starts becoming Merlin a similarly named folkloric character in troll myth-

I wonder if I, a fan coming in at minimum 2023, am arriving to this a little late but- if this isn't going to be a timeline rewrite then let me complain about how specific canonical details contradict with one another, including the glaringly obvious issue of Wizard's addition to the timeline, making Deya the Deliverer the first Trollhunter and thus practically erasing most of the historical Trollhunters or conforming to fit them all in a timeline of 900ish years.

I'll address the elephant in the room when we get to it, but let's set up the basics, both for me and any viewer not already in the know (given that my audience is mostly from transformers and ben 10, I'd say it's a lot of you).

Trolls and humans got off to a bad start, humans living on the surface and trolls having originated from a realm called the Darklands, accessible from a bridge (a gateway) Kilahead bridge. Like with any civilisation there are good and bad trolls, the baddest being Orlagk the Oppressor, leader of the Gumm-Gumms. Having been introduced to the surface, trolls fought with the humans who already lived on it creating the War for the Surface Lands, and their fighting lead the first Heartstone (a gigantic magical gem that serves as the centre of troll caverns, healing them and providing power) to corrupt and birth Gunmar. This war lasted for millennia, Gunmar taking over leadership of the Gumm-Gumms after slaying Orlagk at some vague point, up until the Battle of Kilahead Bridge where the Gumm-Gumms were sealed away in the Darklands again thanks to the Trollhunter Deya the Deliverer.

Okay, sure, that doesn't sound very bad at first, up until you realise that the Battle of Kilahead Bridge was 900 years prior to the series (2016 was it's release date) and thus in the year 1116 AD give or take; the legend of Merlin as a magician, a wizard, was in the 12th century which would've been instead at minimum 1300 AD that's 200 years of difference. Not to mention Angor Rot - a character and antagonist in the show - came begging for magic to stop Gunmar's armies from destroying more and more independant troll tribes, like his own, in 1200 AD at least. Why in the fucking hell would Angor Rot bother to risk his own soul asking for magic, from a sorcerer known as (among many things) the Eldritch Queen, if Gunmar and his Gumm-Gumms were already kept within the Darklands. Gunmar's son Bular, the one Gumm-Gumm to not be banished, is surely not that much of a threat to not one but multiple villages it would send someone to the doorstep of the Pale Lady. In addition, Angor Rot was responsible for killing at least a few Trollhunters, one known and named being Voltar the Voracious, who was the only Trollhunter given an exact year of choosing in 1578. And the fucker is listed BEFORE Deya on the wiki but that alone doesn't mean anything, however she does die in 1620 to Bular, 396 years before the show.

Alright then, so you look at Merlin's mythological existence and go 'now what about the whole thing about millenia' because 12th century doesn't allow the War for the Surface Lands to have a Trollhunter, even with 11 named Trollhunters that come presumably before Deya (Unkar the Unfortunate, despite being trained by Blinky who in human standards - assuming his human body tells us his age - is probably about middle age give or take, fought in the time Gumm-Gumms were still around even if slain by Bular). Given that Trollhunters itself references Merlin's original Welsh name Myrddin (and his in show last name is Ambrosius, which would be Emyrs in the original Welsh, as opposed to Wyllt for 'of the wild), I thought that potentially looking into when Myrddin first came around I would be able to get a better timeline; Myrddin Wyllt was said to have been born - and not just the legend - in 540 AD, which gives between that and 2016 1476 years to work with, allowing the 400ish years ago that Deya died (and the 438 years from when Voltar had the amulet) and the millenia's worth of war the War for the Surface Lands took.

Done deal, right?

Well guess what, some fucker named Spar the Spiteful (not even the first Trollhunter like Deya so proclaims to be) died 5200 years before Jim, our protagonist and first HUMAN Trollhunter, ever picked up the mantle. 5200 years before 2016 is the bloody fucking 4th millenium BC. This period included the beginnings of the Bronze Age, and was the bloody time WRITING was invented! And in Spar's time, there was no DOMESTIC HORSES! HORSE RIDING DIDN'T BLOODY EXIST WHEN SPAR DIED HOW FUCKED IT THAT!?

God FUCKING DAMN IT!

Fine, I can work with this.

Merlin in the show is all the old man we think of him as in myth, but he's also still old when we go back in time to when the Battle of Kilahead Bridge takes place, albeit it without a full head of grey hairs (how does the old man age more than his teen/young adult apprentice) potentially as a young sorcerer/wizard/whatever they use these terms interchangeably, Merlin or Myrddin created the Amulet of Daylight. You could even give more wriggle room between whenever trolls came to the surface and when Merlin made the amulet, because although Orlagk was a figure explicitly older than Gunmar, there is no mention of an amulet without Gunmar simply a time when he was still not a leader. In fact, given that Merlin's original name - Myrddin - came from a riddle designed with the intent to kill Gunmar, a piece informing the Trollhunter teams how to kill Gunmar rather than Orlagk the original leader, perhaps it's befitting to make Myrddin technically younger than the trolls; given that the original purpose of the Amulet of Daylight was not to kill Gunmar but to protect trolls, seeing as how one of the keys to Gunmar's destruction is a Triumbric Stone (one of 3) that resulted in the death of Orlagk, the amulet can date to before Gunmar and have been made after the Gumm-Gumms took out their rage on other trolls instead of humans alone.

The Trollhunter after Spar the Spiteful was Boraz the Bold, named that specifically for taking on 1000 Gumm-Gumms, was killed by Bular who was - as I said - Gunmar's son. While that does not mean that Spar the previous Trollhunter existed before Bular did, it does mean that by the time Boraz was selected after Spar's position Bular was competent enough to slay a Trollhunter, especially one as 'Bold' as Boraz who felled a thousand Gumm-Gumms before falling to 1001. It would mean that his father Gunmar would be much older, potentially tracking further and further back in time and putting Orlagk's death deeper and deeper into the War for the Surface Lands, potentially even aligned Orlagk's death and the Triumbric Stone's creation to a period humans heard of Myrddin, the death of Orlagk potentially landing in 540 AD, perhaps even in 573 AD where an actual battle took place, the Battle of Arfderydd; this details a Riderch Hael, King of Alt Clut (Stratclyde, a Brittonic kingdom in northern... well... Britain, which got annexed in the 11th century AKA 1000 AD to become part of the emerging Kingdom of Scotland) slaughtering the forces of a Gwenddoleu ap Ceidio, Myrddin having gone mad watching that defeat.

The remaining named Trollhunters, ones that weren't explicitly dated and timed, are in a bullshit order on the Wiki that I just have to piece together what is being said to put together a timeline.

Maddrux the Many, he/him in the show and she/her in the comics, was canonically an active Trollhunter before another, Araknak the Agile, was either born or an actual functioning adult; Araknak is the ancestor of the previously mentioned (and assumed to be) middle aged Blinkous Galadrigal and his brother (an older brother or twin depending on who you quote) Dictatious Maximus Galadrigal, the pair being present for the Battle of Kilahead Bridge and still alive by 2016 and idk about Tatious but Blinky appears in 2017 or at least whenever RoTT takes place. To use the term ancestor instead of grandparent or even parent, which technically ancestor can be used on either anyway, means that the exact family history is undetermined. However, we can place Maddrux at the very least on the timeline where Orlagk was still active in, seeing as that was her major enemy in the comics.

At the end of her service instead of going directly to Araknak, a Trollhunter preceded him in Magmar the Molten, the only known mountain troll to be a wielder of Daylight. Interesting to note, Araknak learnt from Magmar a certain combat move so, even before his selection by the amulet Araknak was already preferring the lifestyle of a warrior in comparison to his scholar parents; a trait that outlasted the warrior spirit and descended to the Galadrigals however many years later. Mentioned specifically as preceding not only Araknak but Tellad-Urr, we have another date to place as Tellad-Urr the Triumphant - very soon to be Tellad-Urr the Terrible - was active until 501 CE where Orlagk was still alive; how convientient. It helps that Gogun the Gentle - his immediate successor - would be the only Trollhunter to die of old age, potentially because Gunmar was too busy killing Orlagk and Orlagk too busy being dead for either of them to do anything.

Hopefully Gogun was already an old fart because the oldest recorded troll Chokeenamaga lived to 5352 years and I have no idea if that's slightly above average, notably old, or specific to a troll type (like for example, mountain trolls may have the longest average lifespan of all trollkin), and it's not like I can look at the show for any reference because Draal the Deadly, son of Kanjigar the Couragous and the previous Trollhunter did not age between 900 years yet there are no troll whelps in modern Trollmarket, let alone the fact that the Battle of Kilahead Bridge according to our established Trollhunters could not have happened before 1578 but must have happened between then and 1620. And Draal is an adult in modern day but is rather impulsive and I do not know if that is simply a troll trait or the trait of a twenty something year old that should've had a different design in the past but couldn't because of the limitations of 3D show animation (Prime fans would know or at least see visually that you can't just design a cybertronian version of a bot's root mode without things getting expensive, it's why Skyquake couldn't fly despite looking the same before and after alt mode acquisition).

Speaking of age, this is also the time where Aaarrrgghh!!! was a teenager, which either means that Blinky is actually much younger than Aaarrrgghh!!! or there is another Trollhunter or few between Araknak the Agile and Tellad-Urr the Terrible; 5200 years is a lot of grounds to cover, especially with a Trollhunter dying of age between it. Tellad-Urr has an appearance similar to Kanjigar, and given that it's a book cover rather than a 3D model there may be grounds for him being of the same tribe as Kanjigar if not an ancestor like Araknak to Blinky. It could work give or take, especially since 'ancestor' is less of an official word and more of a footnote for someone's opinion, but it isn't word of god nor anything found in any media.

And keeping with age (last one I promise) Gorgus the Gorgeous, referenced in terms used by modern trolls 'By Gorgus' or 'Great Gorgus', was one of the youngest Trollhunters to be chosen. Whether he was younger than Jim Lake Jr, 16 years old at his time of getting the amulet, depends on what the hell the age of 24 fucking means to a troll. Is it the equivalent of 24 years in troll years? If so then why the hell does he begin training 32 troll years later at age 56 if he wasn't chosen to have the amulet at 24 human years old. What is 24 human years to a troll. NotEnrique, a changeling (troll whelp cursed to change into a human, can do so at will) is canonically a few centuries old, and he is fresh from the Darklands after replacing a human baby Enrique. He at a few centuries old is able to throw and host a troll party at his age, and maybe changeling's age differently and a changeling hosting a troll party would be very new because haha discrimination, but no troll flinches at the concept. And a few centuries could be considered more than 2 (being a few it's already more than 1) so the more centuries you tack on to this college type frat party host the more and more Gorgus' age becomes terrifyingly young like exorbitantly so.

If a few centuries means 'ability to host a party where full grown trolls do keg stands' then 24 probably means whelp, baby, a fucking toddler by troll standards, assuming changelings follow troll aging standards against their human mimicking physical development standards. If a 24 year old Trollhunter is only ONE OF the youngest Trollhunters, who was the youngest? Predestined at bloody birth!? Gorgus started training at age 56, presumably when he was old enough to wield a sword, being trained by none other than Kanjigar himself; Gorgus died during training when a group of Gumm-Gumms attacked, an arrow hitting him in the head. If NotEnrique was an adult, or at the very least on the cusp of it, at a few centuries old - more than 1, probably more than 2 - then what of someone at age 56, less than a few centuries, less than one. Whether Kanjigar was a father at the time or not, loosing a kid under his guidance - to death no less - would've stuck with anyone. Why was this child sentenced to death, and so young too. One can argue all the Trollhunters to failed to live up to legacy, who became their own version of Unkar the Unfortunate, were sentenced to death and fated to die young. Gogun may have defied fate and beat the ticking clock, but Gorgus the Gorgeous - a gorgeous child, a son to parents that will never see their little boy again - proved that there is no outrunning the clock for the bells toll for thee.

If Unkar was before Gorgus, then it is to be presumed that by dying on his first night - after 6 hours of training - that Gorgus the Gorgeous was failed by Blinkous in the same way Unkar had been. The next Trollhunter in line was summoned too soon, so because of Blinky's failure the trolls against Gumm-Gumms were without a defender, potentially reducing the remaining candidates for better trainers by slaughtering them before the Trollhunter was of age. If Unkar was after Gorgus, then Kanjigar needed to step away from training, even as it was his task given to the aging elder Rundle, potentially a younger but very busy Vendel, an elder by proxy of everyone else dying on the edges of Gumm-Gumm blades. He couldn't sacrifice another child to death, and as the amulet falls onto the arrogant overconfident Unkar, Kanjigar could not bare to have stone dust on his hands again. Blinkous Galadrigal (there is no mention of Dictatious despite the presence of Gumm-Gumms in Unkar's time) is tasked to train Unkar, to teach him the tennants of Trollhunter and put to good use his scholarly teachings and pray that the soul of his Trollhunter ancestor guides him. Unfortunately - as Unkar will be enshrined in by title - you cannot let a scholar do a warrior's duty.

However way it plays out, Blinky was young (or at least younger), and his failure marked his reputation for centuries.

There is a Grimbald the Grave, trained with Kanjigar AND Deya, which would definitely place that before 1620 and potentially before 1578; Voltar wasn't mentioned to have been trained by either, but given that he was the last Trollhunter before Deya (at the very least in close proximity), Grimbald most likely came before. Now this seems like a non-issue, if you consider Grimbald against our timeline nothing seems to be wrong, potentially Kanjigar's age since he's been around for a while but his son's an adult in the modern day so he could potentially be older than Blinky who knows. But I have an elephant to address and since it's been so long since I brought it up it's been drinking tea this whole time.

Wizards, the third installment of the Tales of Arcadia series, sequel to Trollhunters, introduces to audiences that Deya the Deliverer was originally Callista the Calamity, a troll who's tribe had been wiped out by humans and had been living in human custody since she was a whelp (or of an age that she had forgotten her name). Deya makes the timeline such a mess, because her first appearance in the comics, she was of an age where Rundle - Vendel's father - was the elder of Glastonbury Tor Trollmarket at the time of Deya, the Trollmarket before Dwoza which is the Trollmarket before Arcadia. Rundle was around in 501 AD, but it was his father Kilfred who was the elder and his son Vendel was of age enough to help in consulting, however old that is. In Wizards however, Vendel was the elder of Dwoza before Deya was Deya and when Callista was still an outcast, and even then he was only the elder by proxy, signs of his father Rundle or of Kilfred missing. Of course however Rundle could have been elder of Dwoza, as his father before him was elder of Glastonbury Tor, simply that he was potentially slain potentially died of old age and that Vendel being one of the few older than most of the Dwozan trolls took over in his father's stead.

The issue with Deya is that I really like the Callista part of her backstory, of being an outsider, an outcast, in the world of trolls that still hated humanity but held a deeper fear of the Gumm-Gumms. Diaspora for trolls, Callista the Calamity is seen as a human pet despite her wanting to find her way home, a home she can never go back to because it had been destroyed long ago; the one place that she could be accepted don't because they see her as too human, a far cry to being called a monster by humans but certainly not relieving. But she had become Deya, and found her footing as the Deliverer, by turning the Trollhunter from a single force to fighting alone to rallying a bunch of... gravellors? (Whatever, I like to think of Dwoza as essentially a refugee tribe given it's diversity in comparison to the Krubera tribe who are only krubera and the Quagawump tribe who are only - save for the generic troll king Angor killed - quagawumps) to fight one last fight against the Gumm-Gumms and ending the War for the Surface Lands.

...SO... that probably means that Grimbald was trained exclusively by Kanjigar after the whole Unkar and/or Gorgus ordeal and eventually got the Trollhunter's amulet himself when Deya was slain, her sacrifice delivering the migrating trolls of Dwoza a chance to get to the New World (or the Americas). Oh and their migration was after Vendel and some king wrote a truce called 'The Pact', which - I mean - it's described as a feeble truce and with a name like that I don't blame it, where they promise to stop eating humans and limited their diet to cats and used clothes which well- they might've broke on the journey to the New World because hiding in the cramped ballast of a 1600s era boat isn't fun nor is it fast. But regardless-

I think for a sense of cohesion, let me pull out an almost timeline for this post.

Trolls who had previously been in the Darklands somehow get to the surface

Tensions between trolls and the already present humans grows beginning the War for the Surface Lands

The intensity of the war corrupts the first Heartstone, giving birth to Gunmar

A young wizard Myrddin creates the Amulet of Daylight and gifts it to the good trolls

Spar the Spiteful gets the amulet. He dies 5200 years ago

Boraz the Bold gets the amulet. He dies to Bular, Gunmar's son.

Maddrux the Many gets the amulet

Magmar the Molten, the first mountain troll Trollhunter, gets the amulet

Araknak the Agile, ancestor to Blinkous and Dictatious Galadrigal, gets the amulet

Tellad-Urr the Triumphant, turned Tellad-Urr the Terrible, gets the amulet. He is killed in 501 AD

Gogun the Gentle gets the amulet.

Orlagk the Oppressor is slain by Gunmar. Gunmar loses an eye

Gogun dies of old age.

Angor Rot makes a pact with the Pale Lady, trading his soul for her magic

Unkar the Unfortunate gets the amulet. He dies 6 hours later

Gorgus the Gorgeous, one of the youngest Trollhunters, gets the amulet. He dies at age 56

Grimbald gets the amulet

Voltar the Voracious, born of two minds, gets the amulet in 1578. He dies to Angor Rot and his soul is stolen

Deya the Deliverer, previously Callista the Calamity, gets the amulet

The Battle of Kilahead Bridge is fought. Gunmar is defeated and the Gumm-Gumms (+ Dictatious Galadrigal) are trapped in the Darklands

Deya dies against Bular, last remaining Gumm-Gumm on the surface, in 1620

Kanjigar the Couragous, trainer of many Trollhunters, gets the amulet. He dies to Bular in 2016

James Lake Junior gets the amulet, and the events of the series take place

So, members of the Trollhunter fandom, how'd I do? If you stuck around this long, welcome to my gimmick, long posts :)

Hoo boy how should I tag this?

#trollhunters #toa #rambling #headcanon #idk this is a timeline rewrite but not a rewrite yaknow #like i'm interested in what the book timeline might have to offer #but idk #this took me several hours to write #give or take 4 hours maybe #not every trollhunter in the history of trollhunting is named because not every trollhunter has been listed #and kanjigar is only noted as the trainer of trollhunters because he's the one trollhunter to have experience with trollhunting i suppose #also- its one thing to have longevity as a species (i come from the transformers fandom those robots are fucking old) #it's another to have fathers and ancestors and dying of old age without considering how that shit works #like the oldest lived troll is in the 5 thousands right? is it the equivalent of 100 years old for humans? #like is the typical age of an elder troll 4000? is it just as likely they might cark it at 3000? #that's 80 and 60 in human terms- maybe the common age of an elder troll is 3500 at a human 70 equivalent #24 years in comparison to 5000 years is like a 6 month old human baby #56 compared to 5000 is 1 year old but surely that is not the case #trolls are apparently born egg-like... as egg-like taking a piece of each other literally and putting them together as one object #that eventually hatches into a troll whelp is egg-like... the parts i mean are heartstones which i think are hearts #draal is described to have hatched this way with ballustra and kanjigar splitting their heartstones #what the hell are gronknuts then meta answer kicking people between the legs is integral to kid comedy #okay i'm going to stop looking at my screen i don't have a mirror but my eyes feel like they're red

[gn4wz-0n-b0n3z]

ithink this is what tumblr would be like in the dogman universe: a simulator

😀 randomcivillian-956 follow

can those villain asshats get control of those goddamn monsters i have lost literally every single fucking thing thanks to those brainless pieces of shits last week a fucking T-REX SKELETON destroyed my fucking HOUSE and everything around it

🪻 inmylane-1999

how are you able to say those words

😀 randomcivillian-956 follow

what words?

🪻 inmylane-1999 the a word, f word, and s word

😀 randomcivillian-956 follow

oh i see you're one of the Collardale inhabitants. screw the fuck off your town is a CURSE

🪻 inmylane-1999

what did i do? :(

10 notes

🪰 greenweirdthingwithteeth follow

hnstly i dont get y Daryl hangs arnd that pig guy hes rlly mean & bad

🐊 piethrowingboss

didnt u help us go after him when he ditched us after the mini jail broke 2 bits?

🪰 greenweirdthingwithteeth follow

yeh butt hes still rlly mean & i was a lil moar concerned 4 Daryl

🐊 piethrowingboss

ohhhh kk

5 notes

🐕 zupabuddiezthezenutz

zomg did u guyz watch that new mini-documentary w/ Petey The Cat n Zarah Hatoff??? that waz tragickk..

#holy shart i have so much moar respect 4 him now..

6 notes

🔄 24hotdogsatyourdoorstep reblogged

🌆 icareforyou follow

still dont know why people are supporting Petey Duckhat just because of that documentary, didn't he terrorize the city for more than a month or two?? ntm he quite literally MUTILATED Officer Knight and Greg The Dog's bodies bad enough with that bomb to where they had to become that sick and horrible abomination i have to stomach through seeing on the news every week.

😀 randomcivillian-956 follow

i know right?? like hes genuinely a horrible cat but people are supporting him for no other reason other than "oh hes a victim!!" like shut the fuck up and grow up.

comicpanel-deactivated-98325749857

op i wouldn't say DogMan is sick and horrible, he seems to be in great condition despite such an accident and hard surgery to conduct, and looks perfectly happy. while i don't support Petey Duckhat either, you took it a step further and suggested that DogMan is currently in conditions horrible enough to render him an "abomination".

🌆 icareforyou follow

dont you post tips for fucking evil monsters on your blog.

#LMAOOO dude was SLAUGHTERED so hard they deactivated #redogs

1,509 notes

🌭 24hotdogsatyourdoorstep

walking on the street with a small can of living spray in my pocket and the nearest cop explodes into blood guts and viscera

10 notes

🦷 bigmonsterinyourheart

okay i get that Dr. Scum is a real and kinda sucky person and all that but his labcoat kinda fucks!!

0 notes

✨ lookatthestars

Hot take or whatever but I don't think we should trust a guy who gets really distracted by squirrels and balls and a kitten who could easily get hurt to protect our city. Lightning Dude IS one of the better options as they ARE a highly durable and strong robot, but The Bark Knight and Cat Kid maybe aren't our best bets, they could get hurt easily and aren't exactly professionals.

Don't get me started on the Friendly Friends, I don't think we can trust two guys who JUST left the same exact trio that was responsible for that marshmallow factory's destruction (which left many injured, some DEAD), what if they're pretending? Also the bugs could easily get killed, they're small and fragile, the most work they can do without a high risk of getting smashed is spying on villains.

Commander Cupcake's a different story, as I'm pretty sure that guy only helped out, like, 3 times.

#anti-supa buddies #anti-friendly friends #twinkle twinkle little star

15 notes

🪁 lalalalala89

dude imagine if we were in a book rn and ppl were posting on tumblr abt us

0 notes

🎠 supastarr

remember, calico trans toms are perfectly valid! even cis toms can be calicos, and fur pattern doesn't determine exact gender, especially with fur dying technology nowadays! :)

506 notes

#dogman #dog man #matthew.txt #IVE BEEN WORKING ON THISS POST FOR 4EVER TRYING 2 FIGURE OUT DOGMAN UNIVERSE DISCOURSE TOPICS

[nopeferatu]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love❤



OOF...well, since most of my favorite pieces of writing are eternal wips, I guess I'll just post the snippets here, haha. Please bear in mind that nearly all of them are over a year old, and none of them are very good—I do draw more than I write, after all. But I do dabble here and there and so yeah! This is some of that!

5. Untitled WIP

This is suuuper old, one of the first things I wrote after watching the movie again in early 2022 and falling deep down the rabbit hole. It's actually not that great and is pretty sad in it's entirety, so I tried to grab the better chunk, haha. Try, if you can, to mind the first person pov—I know better now.

It's been years and I still really miss you, Jack. All I known in life is the feeling a missing you. You think I'd get used to the feeling, what with all them months and miles between us in the before times, but this missing you runs so much deeper than these tired bones have ever known before.

Yanno how you said your Mama believed in the Pentecost? She ever tell you 'bout that Bible story, how God made Adam and Eve? It goes like this—the Lord took a big pile a sand and breathed into it to make Adam, then he took Adam's rib and from it, went on to make Eve.

Was thinking on it the other day and figured, what if that's how God made the two a us? What if he breathed life into a pile a horse shit, then when I came up, took my rib, put it in a rodeo fuck up and sent the two a us out to the world, pair a deuces trying to fnd their way? I always thought maybe this hurt was emptiness, where my heart went missing after you were gone 'cause you'd taken it like you took my shirt. Now I'm thinking, what if the pain's from that ol' rib coming back after you died to settle in where it don't belong no more? Tryna rearrange all my insides that gone without for so long, and my body's rejecting it like a horse rejecting rider 'cause it knows it don't belong to me no more, never did, neither.

Then again, maybe it's just busted up in there. Maybe it has been since the summer a '63, and I just ain't taken notice 'til you went on and met your maker.

Maybe this ol' heart's just broken.

Know I shouldn't be asking shit from you considering all the ways I took and didn't give you nothing but hurts in return, but I’m asking as a man who never asked for nothing from you, neither—you wait for me, Jack Twist, just a little longer. Used to say that I couldn't wait to see you again, but you helped give me a second shot, try and fix up what I didn’t think I could hardly stand no more. Now I know I can bid my time here a while longer, being a daddy and granddaddy, living out some a the life that you didn't get to have.

So you wait for me… even if it's just so I can tell you how God damn sorry I am for it all.

I love ya, little darlin'. Reckon I always have, reckon I always will. You enjoy them whiskey rivers, but make sure to save the last round for me.

4. Want

This snippet is also super old, and once again, forgive me for the first person pov. Ik a lot of ppl don't typically like it in fiction and I've also kind of grown unfond of it. I was young! I was dumb! I've learned I've learned I've learned!!!

As I'm crying and coughing up the blood from my lungs into my mouth, the second thought comes to mind: just how bad I want for Ennis to come find me, come and save me from what I know's coming next. But he weren't there. Never was, never would be. The tears came down harder 'cause a that one.

The very last impossible thing I wanted was something I dreamed of for a long time. Even though most everything I craved was outta reach, I always thought I could get it, somehow, some way if I tried hard enough. But from the very start I'd known this want was impossible, and yet sometimes I wanted it more than I wanted life itself.

Dying alone on the side a that hot Texas highway, all I wanted was to be nineteen again, close enough to touch the Heavens on Brokeback Mountain.

I thought I could hear Ennis hollering for me back at camp, and I smiled. I'm comin', cowboy.

Then I closed my eyes, and would never want for nothing again.

3. Untitled WIP

I really hope to finish this one, someday. I really like playing around with the other potential bad end of BBM, where Jack ditches Ennis for Randall after May 1983 because his hope and patience has run dry.

"Name's Randall. Educated type of fella, went to college, got him a job as foreman of the ranch down a ways from my place." Jack takes a deep breath, sighs it out. "Tells me he loves me more times 'n even Lureen's said it," he stays quiet a moment, kicks at the loose pebbles on the ground. "Tell you what—feels good to hear it, too. Man's gotta know he's loved ever now 'n' again, Ennis."

Ennis thinks of cold mountain nights filled with the bleating of sheep and illegal elk, of dozens of jobs taken and abandoned, of divorce; thinks of four years of missing and bruising kisses, of sixteen years of hands worshiping at the temple of a bull rider's broken body, and of every cold night in between filled with dreams about bright blue eyes and the warmth of a perfect smile. He thinks of the last twenty years he spent dropping everything at the siren call of a postcard, and for the first time in his life Ennis thinks about love; wonders what it might be, if not that.

But Ennis doesn't say so, just clenches his trembling fist even tighter into itself.

2. Five Boys that Jack Twist Had Liked (and One More Whom He Had Loved)

This one is another old one that I reaally hope to finish one day. I have a about 3 1/2 of the 6 part written, I just...need to find the gumption to get through the rest.

4. Andrew Peterson

Andrew had been one of his daddy's ranch hands, a boy who would've been two grades above him if Jack hadn't dropped out of high school his sophomore year. He had just graduated, was one of the lucky few whose parents didn't value his contribution to the family finances over his education, and was hired on for the summer in the hopes of making a little cash before heading out of their dead-end town and into the real world. It was a plan that Jack, at sixteen, had already been well acquainted with.

It wasn't often that the Twist Ranch hired hands around his age to help out around the place, and Jack, always the friendly type and more than just a little lonely, had been eager to make a new acquaintance. Andrew hadn't seemed to mind when Jack started taking his chores alongside him, appearing glad for the company, himself. They shared easy smiles and private jokes, becoming such good friends in such a short time that his Mama would tease about one of them losing their very shadow if the other wasn't around.

Just like with Stephen before him, Jack had been drawn to Andrew like a moth to a flame. He never understood what there was in a boy that drew his eye to them in a way that none of the fillies who flirted around with him ever did, until Andrew, after a tiring day mending the old fence posts that corralled the bulls in and about two months worth of dropping frustrated gestures and signals, had said, "Fuck it," pulled Jack out to his Daddy's feed barn and into a scalding kiss that left Jack weak in the knees.

Andrew hadn't been his first kiss—that honor had gone to lil' Miss Sharon King back in the first grade. Seeing as how Jack was well regarded amongst the ladies as a 'pretty boy', there'd been plenty of kisses after that, too. Andrew had, however, been the first kiss that finally had him understanding what all the fuss was about.

As if to slide it on home, later that summer he even made sure to be Jack's first fuck, rounding out on all the bases that left Jack with a whirlwind of questions about himself and even more feelings bursting inside than his young heart ever thought it could handle.

"Been savin' to go to school in Denver," Andrew started, breaking the silence one night out in the feed barn. They sat passing a cigarette and some of his daddy's stolen whiskey between them, riding out the residual high of a midnight roll in the literal hay. It had been dark out, and with only the full moon and the hot red cherry at the end of the cigarette bathing them in their glow, the two were effectively shielded from the scathing eyes of the light. "'m leavin' in a few months, splittin' before fall comes." His gaze was fixed somewhere on the black horizon, watching something that went unseen to Jack.

Jack felt his stomach sink like the stones he used to skip in the creek way out past his house.

"Denver? Ain't that a might bit far for some schoolin'?" He tried to laugh, but it came out sounding choked and strange. Instead, he looked down into the whiskey bottle in his hand and took a swig from it, willing its sweet burn to help him maintain an air of indifference. "What they got down there, anyway?"

Truth be told he didn't blame Andrew for wanting to go—he had been itching to leave Lightning Flat in the rearview, himself. Still, he was unsure that he wanted the conversation to continue. He didn't want to think about his new companion leaving so soon after this something between them had begun. Nevertheless, curiosity—slightly embittered—took hold and ultimately won out.

Andrew took a long drag out of the cigarette. Its hot cherry burned a bright, fiery red before dulling once more to an ashy gleam. "A chance for fellas like us," he finally breathed. The smoky tendrils made their escape past his lips, taking his words with them.

"Oh," Jack muttered after a beat of silence. He wasn't quite sure he understood, nor wanted to understand, what Andrew was getting at, but tried hard not to let his disappointment seep out into his tone regardless.

It hadn't worked. In a moment, Andrew smashed the lit butt out against the wall, leaving them cloaked in darkness once more before leaning over to kiss him sweetly. It had knocked the breath out of Jack, just like their kisses were wont to do.

"Maybe someday you can come pay me a visit. I dunno, it might just be a sweet life down there, yanno?" Andrew's smile, only barely visible under the glow of the full moon above, was easy and inviting.

For once all motormouth Jack could do was smile back before eager hands, warm like the end of the cigarette and the whiskey settled deep in his belly, were on him again, ready to reignite the fire that set Jack aglow.

That summer, Andrew had pressed red-hot marks into his flesh that would soon fade on the outside but sear into Jack's soul for a lifetime, forever branding him as the different sort of boy he had been both warned about and accused of being in the entirety of his short life.

Looking back, he realized he'd known what Andrew had meant all along. At sixteen years old Jack knew what queer was, and finally understood, with no room for doubt in his mind, that it was him. He reckoned that weren't nobody's business but his own, though.

After that summer, Jack never did see Andrew again.

Twenty-four years later, tucked cozy warm into his Colorado bed, Andrew would awake from a dream about blue eyes and wonder, not for the first time, what had ever happened to the kid who'd been his that one short summer before making the move that forever changed his life. Looking beside himself, into the handsome face that had laid dreaming beside him every night the past fifteen years, Andrew would smile and hope that, wherever Jack Twist was in the world, he had gotten out of Wyoming and been lucky enough to make his own bit of bliss out of the hard hand he'd been dealt.

1. Clipped

Summary: Tomorrow may tell another story, but for tonight, this man—with his baby blue eyes, sleepy, self-conscious grumbles, and beautiful clipped dick—was his, all his, and that was enough. It had to be enough.

Aaand here's a fic I've actually posted! Lol! Fun fact: this was actually the very first fic I wrote following watching bbm again in January 2022, and it remains like. The only thing I'm actually super duper proud of. It isn't even that good, but I'm just proud that I actually finished something for once lol.

Thanks for the ask, @alifeasvivid! :D

#brokeback mountain #ennis del mar #jack twist #still brokeback posting #my writing

[masterjedilenawrites]

🌙 Master Jedi Lena's 2023 Blog Stats 🌙

Soo I'm a nerd who loves to analyze data, even on my day off 🤓 I did a little deep-dive into my posts from 2023 and came up with the following stats for the year...

✨ Number of Posts: 168

Advice/Opinions: 4

Blind dates: 51

Fic Chapters: 10

Headcanons: 34

Rebels commentary: 23

One shots: 13

Polls: 33

✨ Words written: 82,879

Longest: Falling for You (6,219 words)

Shortest: "It's About the Clones" (67 words)

✨ Poll votes: 6,472

✨ Replies: 63

✨ Reblogs: 1,100

✨ Likes: 4,270

✨ Month with the most posts: February (28 posts)

✨ Month with the least posts: October (3 posts)(uh where did I go?? lol)

✨ Top 5 posts by notes:

"It's About the Clones" mini-rant/opinion (399 notes)

Bois & TBB Reacting to S/O Cutting Their Hair headcanons (263 notes)

Who Would Win in a Fight: Maul or Kylo poll (254 notes)

Falling for You Jesse x Reader one shot (215 notes)

Bois & TBB With a Smart S/O headcanons (208 notes)

✨ Total characters written: 115

✨ Top 5 characters written:

Echo (appeared 32 times)

Hunter (30 times)

Wrecker (30 times)

Crosshair (29 times)

Tech (29 times)

✨ Milestones (thanks Tumblr for notifying about these now!):

Feb 14: 2 year blog anniversary 💕

Apr 21: 1,000 followers 👀

Jun 28: 2,500 likes 👍🏻

Sep 16: 1,000 posts 🏆

✨ Misc Stats:

53% came from requests, 46% were of my own volition. The remaining 2 were for fic exchange events, so bit of both.

70% of one shots/fic chapters were reader inserts.

Only 4 NSFW posts.

Maul won all 3 polls I put him in, about fighting or being sexy (or both??)

Post with the most characters: Seeing S/O's Tits for the First Time, 30 characters (why did I feel the need to cram that many in this one?? lmao i'm dying)

✨ Personal Favorites:

8 one shots on May the 4th Be With You... I loved writing each and every one of those stories, and posting them all on one day was just so fun

Blind Date requests... Even though they took me foreverrr, I enjoyed getting to know so many people and brightening their days with pretend dates

Falling For You one shot/fic exchange... I feel so protective of Jesse after exploring his character in this piece. He hardly ever gets picked for anything and I just need everyone to love him now okay.

Lesser-Known Clone Love Languages... I incorporated a lot more other clone characters throughout my writing this year, from Mayday to Blackout, from Waxer to Bly... even Hawk got a line in a fic.

No links for this one, just general appreciation for all the anons and new friends I got to talk with! 🤗 Those posts weren't included in this analysis, but I did stop scrolling to fondly reread our chats about our OCs, queer representation, and name ideas for the Grand Inquisitor.

Sooo yeah! That was my year! 😅 Idk if anyone will really care about any of this but I mainly did this for me anyway. It was a good reminder of just how much I accomplished, all the fun I had, the great community I'm a part of... This blog has been with me through all the ups and downs for the past couple years, and it's genuinely brought me so much joy. I can only hope it's done the same for others ❤️

Happy New Year, y'all! Looking forward to another year of joy, fun, and clone comfort hours ☕️

#masterjedilena #2023 #reflection #end of the year #stats #data #numbers #analysis #all the nerdy things #tech would be so proud

[tobybells]

Hey, hi! Toby here. Here’s my first CrimeBoys fic rec list! This is my first time doing anything like this lol, so do forgive me if i make any mistakes - criticism and such is welcome :) (Summaries don’t include excerpts! Tell me if you’d all prefer I included them.)

Toby’s Personal Recs!

Tommy Makes Divorce 1000% Funnier by SneakyToni [T, 5k+, 1/1 || Tommy Videos AU.. I think.. // Crack Treated Seriously, Light Angst, Fluff, Kid!Tommy, Parental!George] George and his husband are going through a divorce and a custody battle, leaving Wilbur to babysit their little gremlin while they iron things out.

Because dreaming costs money, my dear by eneliii [T, 15k+, 2/2 || Hybrids + Modern AU // Kid Fic, Fluff, Angst, MCD, Hopeful Ending, Violinist!Tommy] Tommy wants to be a violinist.

Let's make clay figurines together by orphan_account [G, 16k, 1/1 || Modern AU // Fluff, Humor, Light Angst, h/c, Artist!Tommy, Teacher!Wilbur] After two months of art lessons, Tommy very much regretted choosing it as a GCSE. Not because he was bad at it or anything—no he loved drawing—but it was his teachers. It was how his school taught art. Everything about it sucked the creativity out of it. It took away his choice of expression, forced him to write coursework about overrated, dead artists and their dogshit contemporary pieces. But then he got a new teacher to sub into his Friday lessons. He didn't think someone whose last name referred to the stuff in chimneys could make him love art again. Yet, Mr Wilbur Soot did.

under the brine by bonesandthebees [T, 29k+, 4/4 || Modern AU // Angst with a Happy Ending, Horror, Temporary MCD, Memory loss] Wilbur finds a dead body at the beach, and that's only the start of his problems. or or, crimeboys enjoyers just trust me on this I gotchu

Waisting Your Time by shutupanakin [T, 33k+, 9/9 || Modern AU // Angst, h/c, Healing, Bittersweet Ending] Tommy planned on dying. He meets Wilbur instead.

Black Honey by birdfeet [T, 39k+, 5/? || Modern AU // Road Trips, Angst, h/c, Dysfunctional Relationships/Family, Minor Violence // Underage Alcohol & Drug Usage] Being alone isn't lonely, but sometimes having someone else there is

vanderlyle crybaby cry by bonesandthebees [T, 41k+, 7/7 || Modern AU // Angst, Wilbur-centric, Mental Health, Dysfunctional Family/Relationship // Suicide Attempt, Suicidal Thoughts] Wilbur is only a few months away from getting his degree when he has a mental breakdown and is unwillingly pulled out of his classes. With nothing to fill his days, Phil gets Wilbur a part time job at a local bookstore, where he finds himself getting trained by a loud-mouthed teenager who hates his guts right off the bat. Great. All he wants to do is graduate, but now he has to deal with a seventeen year old trying to get him fired. Thanks Phil. But somehow, this kid ends up being exactly what Wilbur needs.

I'm Still An Ugly by AlliRose09 [M, 66k+, 29/29 || Superpowers/Superhero AU // SBI, Heavy Angst, h/c, Manipulative!Dream, Villain!Tommy // Abuse, Amputation] A new generation was here. One filled with heroes but also with villains. A group, which the heroes call The Uglies, were rumored to have been making a plan to wipe out the capital. The heroes, also known as P.o.G need a miracle. Instead they got Tommy. Or Tommy is apart of an evil group and gets taken by P.o.G after an accident. Soon he learns that his supposed enemies might not be that bad.

His Curse Of Binding by orphan_account [T, 144k+, 30/30 || Foster AU + Greek Mythology // SBI, Angst with a Happy Ending, Immortal!Tommy, MCD (sort of), Reincarnation] In which Tommy Soot, originally born in 1509, is cursed to be reborn, to never reach adulthood unless he figured out the Greek myth of his lifetime. He had one rule of not allowing himself to get attached to people but he would have never guessed that a foster family of the creator of Minecraft, an anime stan and a Soundcloud musician would break that rule. ~ SBI Foster AU but with Greek mythology.

Well, that’s most - if not all - of my favourite CrimeBoys fics! Some of these are popular, and you may recognise them or their authors. Hopefully, you find a new fic from this list. Feel free to drop into my Ask Box or request a list! See you darlings soon. 💙

#crimeboys #crime boys #tommyinnit #wilbur soot #crimeboys fic recs #ficrecs #fanfic recs #fanficton #fanfic

[gaming-thoughts-by-an-idiot]

The call of cthulhu

Chapter 7:

I got my brother to play the shambler part, it took 4 months before either remembered it, but it's done, thank god.

*the nameless bookstore *

"Alrighty bois, here we are, what's up"

"Uh oh, blood on the window"

"Oh yeah, let's close the door aggressively, surely that didnt make a noise and potentially alert whatever or whomever is in here"

"Ugh, sigmund Freud. Or I, dont really know anything about him, just the whole sexist something"

"Yeah because, walking around with a lighter around all these books seems like a brilliant idea"

"Eww, wtf is that?? Looks like a huge bug"

"Bleeeh i hate it ew ew ew"

Pierce, picks up a book: how many volumes are there in this collection?

*Also pierce picking up every red book and repeats the same thing*

Game: wanna read the book?

Me: since you're asking I feel I should say no

Game:

Me:

Game:

Me: yeah alright

Game: this will affect your destiny

Me: well fuck. I hope it's for the better

"Ooooh, I had to listen to the tube things, and now the red books are interesting"

Pierce: a strange amulet... I have a feeling that I'd better not touch it

Also pierce: *picks it up*

"Oh? I got an achievement for picking up an occult thing"

"I'm stuck"

"9th volume, I'm looking for the 9th volume"

"He said he cant stop reading it... so it should be somewhere he could sit"

"Ew the bugs"

"My amnesia lamp is dying fast"

"The ghostly fog around the lamps are so creepy"

"Am I looking for a book that doesnt exist?"

"Oh wait, it says that they're numbered, the tube sound things"

"  'Order is the pleasure of reason, but disorder is the delight of the imagination'  huh, I like that quote"

The game: the clues of the combination are to be found in three cylinders, each hidden where life and study combine in the greek world

Me: I got them

Game: each cylinder is numbered-

Me: yeah

Game: yeah :)

Me: what?

Game: :)

Me: sir-

"OH OH WAIT OH OKAY, NUMBERED! AS IN NOT JUST 1, 2 AND 3, BUT LIKE SERIAL NUMBER, OH ALRIGHT I GOT IT"

"I'm such a smart cookie"

"Gotta find myself a cookie monster"

"Wait.. no no nevermind I take it back"

"Asdfghjkl Hannibal is the cookie monster"

"Alrighty gang, first thing"

"One= 10342

Two= .. wait, okay I thought I was onto something here but they're all labelled the same number?"

"No wait"

"Oh no, yeah, the same, ffs"

"Let's try anyways"

"Okay but, theres a glowing star there, it pushed the love child of cthulhu away, and you're like? 'Hell yeah lets touch it'??? This entire game is just Pierce being insane"

"When me and Odin (lil bro who helped me) talked about this game, both would've just gone nah, and just, ya know x.x

Not that we would ON PURPOSE investigate here at all, but after all Pierce have seen? Nah, nah man"

"Didnt work, I mean ofc it didnt"

"I dont have that many brain cells to solve anything with numbers"

"I can do this, I'm sure..  I mean I cant, but let's pretend"

"I can get pleasantly surprised"

"Okay, I have to be missing something"

"Oooh, maybe the love child of cthulhu took book nr 9?"

"If this is as easy as the globe one? I'm gonna go cry"

"Aaaa idk the codddddeeeee"

"So code 666, 616 and 404, does not work"

"I gotta Google "

"Excuse me??"

• Cylinder 1 - Cylinder 1 - regards the Goblet from this room. Indicated number 5. "How??? How does that indicate 5???"

• Cylinder 2 - regards chessboards on the table and the chess pieces defending the queen. Indicates number 3.

"???? WHAT IS THIS GAME"

• Cylinder 3 - regards the books you can find on the counter and to the total amount. Indicates number 9.

"WELL WO-FUCKING-HOO"

"This game is difficult"

"Cthulhu is mocking me, I'm sure"

"Yay. I opened it to find the forbidden book"

"And now he's gonna read it, wow, sure, toss all that stuff down to the floor"

"Oh great, eye of sauron"

"Ooo, floating books and?? Weeeee~"

Chapter 8: Institute

"Yaaaay... more hospital insanity, woo"

"Oh, his mind was projected into another body? Oh yeah because Pierce needs body dysphoria added to all his ptsd"

"Oh cool, I'm a woman now, and my name is... Marie Colden."

"Okay so this dying dude, got something in his body, they joked about him being pregnant.... yoo"

"Oh ew, hes mutating"

"The extra nurse is just watching them talk about illegal things"

"I hate first pov"

Me, whispering: i dont know what that word means

"Nightmare city"

"Eaugh the food looks like... I dont even wanna say it"

"Oooh, I get to see from her pov. I thought this was like a new thing"

"Oh damn, Pierce is down there living through hell, and I'm running around looking at books"

"I got an achievement for healing all the patients"

"I'm just looking for a tool"

"Aha!"

"I'm calling it, the young woman who wash the bathrooms are gonna die"

"??? I WAS STABBED"

"I'm back as the idiot detective!"

"The book dealer guy! Drake! Got a gun on me!"

"I got an achievement that said I fell into Fuller's trap :("

"I only think of Brian Fuller "

"I got a rare achievement because I keep reading the cursed books, oh jesus why am I like this"

"Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back"

"If I was pierce, I'd invest in shoes that doesnt tap"

Pierce: enough time wasted-

Me: I AM TRYING TO FIND THE WAY OUT YOU SHIT

"Oh fuck oh wow"

"Oh, ah.... hh... scary scene... I wish I could record my scream there hahh, it wasnt a AAA it had two sets in it, wow ooof"

"Okay okay, I managed to get past the ??? That was, and I'm finally back to normal, I'm just gonna see if I die, and maybe I'll just game more another day"

"I'm in a hallway... no matter where i run, theres no end"

"Who's singing?"

"I even tried to run backwards"

"What if I stand still?"

"Or I'll close my eyes and run into every door"

"Okay okay uh, inside the patted room"

"Going insane !!"

"Ah, okay so, surgery, fun"

"W h a t  T h e  f u c k "

"SHOOT HIM, SHOOT HIM FOR FUCKS SAKE JUST SHOOT WHY ARE YOU HESITATING????"

"???? Marie, zombie??? Marie just knocked me out, wtf is this"

"OKAY SO"

"Crazy painting woman is alive, alright. Husband is the cthulhu love child, the doctor is clearly in love with her... we're running from guards.... and I think??? We're gonna gas them...."

"Okay.... uh.... so, Sarah is... the key to get cthulhu.... and her husband, tried to "protect" her, and hes dead, combined effort... and now we're in chapter 9.

#gaming #funny #relatable gaming thoughts #call of cthulhu #the call of cthulhu #call of cthulhu game #horror game

[deadlynyghtshayde]

Grief and frustration under cut

I don't know how many goddamn times I have to say "I have trauma around feeling safe sleebetter.aler my brother died, and prefer to have my door closed" before my family get it through their fucking heads that I. Have. P.T.S.D. From. My. Brother. Dying. And. How. I. Found. Out. That makes sleeping with my door open at night, so triggering.

It's been 4 years, 5 this September. What is so hard to understand, so they stop suggesting "just leave your door open" when it comes to me talking about settling Kai in for the night.

I'm lucky I don't have to lock the door anymore. That one lasted 3 years. How is "I was traumatized and find doing that thing fucks me up greatly" not a good enough reason to stop the suggestion. I've started getting blunter and ruder about it because it gets to the point where I have to remind them multiple times a week when they're in that mindset.

And it's not even like I'm asking for help or answers and I don't like what they're saying. They offer the advice unsolicited.

It's simple. The night before I fell asleep on an uncovered bed because my sheets were in the dryer and I didn't mean to fall asleep, I woke up at like midnight/1am, realized what had happened, pulled the uncovered duvet over me and slept on the mattress on uncovered pillows and an uncovered duvet. Then I woke up screaming at 4 something to my grandfather, slamming my door open and banging on it, wailing, I thought he'd fallen on his way to the bathroom. I, shaking, go over to him to ask what's wrong, and he's on his knees on the floor with a phone in his hand. He shoves it into my hands and says he doesn't understand and repeats my brothers name. I take the phone thinking he got arrested or something, only for the man on the other end to tell me my brother was found dead. I screamed, apologized to the man for screaming in his ear, and asked him what I needed to know, what I needed to do, and who we needed to contact. I didn't want my parents getting the same call as my grandfather, so I took the consulate number, told him I would tell them and if he hadn't heard back from them tomorrow night to try calling them if he must.

I had to pick up the pieces of my grandfather, who was wailing on the couch. In the last three years (at that time), he had already lost his wife and one grandson. He was pleading with his god to tell him why he had had to lose another. It didn't help that my brother was by far his favorite. I had to tell my friends, I was supposed to work that day. First thing. I was not going to be going in, if they could please tell my boss, and I'd call later myself. I had to call my parents because I wasn't going to have that man call them and tell them the worst news of their life like a robot, and the gods knew Nonno was in no position to tell them. He could tell his people, our people, when he was ready. Call one member of the family and let it spread. But I was the one who had to tell my parents that their son, my brother, who was supposed to be getting on a plane that day to go home, wouldn't be coming back. They weren't even together, mom was home alone, and dad was out on business, but I couldn't wait to tell him. I had to tell him while he was out on the road, I couldn't make my mom have to be the one to tell him, and he'd know something was gravely wrong the moment he'd walk through the door once he got home. The first time I ever spoke to his girlfriend, someone he'd been talking about marriage with, it was to confirm that he was gone, as she had left him that night to go back home overseas herself and found out through a barrage of messages after she got off the plane for a layover.

For months, I had to be the backbone of my grandfathers stability. "Stay strong for nonno" I only took 3 days off before my dad told me to go back to work, he thought it would be better for my head, I wonder if that's why I'm so resistant now.

So forgive me for getting pissed off when something that makes me relive that near daily is treated as so simple to do, I'm being stupid needing to be told over and over again to do it. Why won't I just listen?

Forgive me for being sharp, forgive me for speaking with ice and knives when I ask how many times I need to explain that once simply leaving the door unlocked would summon dreams and nightmares so cruel I would stay out until the dawn was about to break. Waiting to ensure that when I got home, back to the space where I had to hear the same footsteps I heard that night pass 3, 4 times a before the morning, the space that is supposed to be mine, supposed to be safe, I would be unable to dream. Because even a dream pleasant and warm with the familiarity of his voice left echoes of the most bittersweet pains. At least now, most nights, I can sleep with the door simply shut and not have to worry.

I hate that I have this pain, that I can't just get over it. They all have. But they didn't find out like I did, and they didn't have to become the keeper like I did.

At this point, when I do dream of him, it doesn't hurt. It feels like the comfort I always wanted it to be. But when it first began, even the sweet dreams were full of pain; my pain, his pain, at first he didn't know in my dreams. I was the only one who could see him, and he didn't understand why he was being ignored. Why we were planning a party for him, it made no sense to him. Then started the whispers of what everyone hopes is true. They made a mistake. He's alive. And, in my dreams, he begged me to fix the mistake and find him. "This is not a dream," "I'm not dead,"and around this time, I read a story where a character says, "A dream would never tell you they're not a dream." My phone almost went across the room in hurt and rage because, yes, it would. Of course it would. If the depths of your soul wanted that dream to not be a dream, the dream would want that too.

All of this, really, is to say that there are things I just can't do now. And I shouldn't have to be forced to try when I have already come so far. I can't sleep on a bare bed. I bought new quilts and refuse to use the old one, so even if the duvet cover is in the wash, the duvet doesn't have to be. I don't like my grandfather yelling up the stairs for me. I don't like him hovering outside my door on the phone. And above all, I don't like sleeping with the door open if the sun isnt up. Even now still I lock it at least once a month.

Im fine. Or at least I will be, I woke up at 3:30am so I need to sleep. Then I should be better. But overall, I'm fine.

[equestrianwritingsstuff]

In recognition of 200 followers.....

I composed a list of 200 hero x villain dialogue prompts for you guys to ask me or reblog it and ask your own followers or if you take inspiration.

Thank you so much! It means a whole lot!

1. "I wish I had longer to love you."

2. "Sometimes being the greatest is being the worse."

3. "I will kill you if you die on me."

4. "Bury me... under a willow tree... with tulips and lilies to blossom in the spring and a small stream to keep me company."

5. "Villains aren't capable of love; yet, here I am crying over your grave."

6. "The kitten's name is Max."

7. "I'm going to get a beer."

8. "There is only one way to kill me, but you could never muster the strength to pull through."

9. "I'm dizzy with love for you."

10. "Hero, you are drunk not a toddler."

11. "I pledge to serve you willingly, butthead."

12. "Ride the waves with me." "You are a mermaid, no thanks."

13. "Stay awake for me; it's only a little farther."

14. "I can't carry you!"

15. "He isn't much, but we'll make do."

16. "I WANT TO SEE HER! LET ME SEE HER PLEASE. Please..."

17. "George Washington never told a fib, and I am greater than him, so trust me, Hero, when I say I am telling the truth."

18. "Eggs and butter make dough, knives and guns make death."

19. "You are insane."

20. "The bomb is going off in twenty seconds, Hero. Run now. I-I'm going to stop it."

21. "What is love?"

22. "I don't get the function of hugs."

23. "Mentally I'm good, but physically..."

24. "I only wished for happiness from that genie. I guess it was evil."

25. "Break him, shatter him, destroy him."

26. "Sing with me."

27. "Villain you are touch starved, not dying."

28. "What the heck did you do to your hair." "What? You don't like it?" "It looks like my cat's litterbox."

29. "Don't give me hope."

30. "I am not a disease or a parasite. I am a human. I am one of those millions you swore to protect."

31. "Kiss, marry, kill?" "Kill, kill, kill."

32. "You created me."

33. "Villain don't you dare pass out."

34. "I like the look of blood on you, compliments your eyes."

35. "I kinda dropped Hero through space."

36. "Power exhaustion sucks."

37. "Time to save the world. Yay!" *says in sarcasm*

38. "Let me feed you Hero."

39. "You do not have AC?!"

40. "Villain you have a fever."

41. "Am I drunk?"

42. "Movies. Nine o'clock. Don't be late."

43. "Lemme grab a beer and we are good to go."

44. "Don't. Look. At. Me."

45. "He just had his wisdom teeth out sooo." "How bad can it be? Villain has been shot with twenty tranq darts at one and didn't pass out... immediately anyway, took a good twenty minutes." "Well, you see-" "THE KITTEN IS TRYING TO KILL ME!!!!!"

46. "She needs surgery."

47. "It's a panic attack..." "KISS HIM!"

48. "Blood, gore, madness... this was made for me."

49. "Quit drooling on me and sit up."

50. "There's only one bed."

51. "He looks so cute when he sleeps."

52. "Of all the places to live, you had to choose a heavily fortified medieval castle two thousand years in the past?"

53. "You are a peacock Hero."

54. "Let's see who will drown first. You or me. One, two, three... let's go!"

55. "I wasn't always like this."

56. "Madness is for geniuses, not for me."

57. "It's just a sedative that's going to make you nice and docile."

58. "He's out." "Good, let him rest, villainy is hardwork."

59. "I love her, but she doesn't love me."

60. "If I had a choice to save you or me, I'd pick me."

61. "Gag her."

62. "They aren't made for this, give them mercy."

63. "Talk now or she dies."

64. "Broken ribs, broken jaw, broken arm... are you sure you want me to continue." "No." "Then tell me your name."

65. "Get me some thread and a needle. Just don't touch me."

66. "The police are coming."

67. "Tell me where she is. TELL ME WHERE IS SHE OR I WILL SLASH YOUR THROAT AND TOSS YOU IN THE SEWER!!!!!"

68. "I love you." "I don't."

69. "Hug me just one last time."

70. "Villain hey hey hey. Calm down. You've been in a pretty bad accident."

71. "They won't be able to walk again."

72. "Tell me... just tell if they made it."

73. "Can't you just poof me another arm?"

74. "If you saved all of them, you can save me."

75. "I'm really tired..."

76. "Sleep. I will stay with you."

77. "She is sixteen years old." "All musicians start young." "This isn't a concert, this is life. Stop ruining it."

78. "He"s been in an accident." "Where?" "Five minutes away from your place."

79. "I wish he wasn't unconscious, so I could talk to him. So I could thank him."

80. "It's been four months now. I have came everyday and, uh, I dunno what to say. Hero, I need you to wake up. I can't function knowing you are right here."

81. "I have a date." "Hmm with who?" "Supervillain." "When and where honey?"

82. "Shhhhhhh. Be quiet. We are still being hunted."

83. "Desert?" "What are you trying to do? Kill me?"

84. "I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you." "I know, I know dear and I so sorry, but I need you to help me. I need you to help them."

85. "Villain just sleep. Allow the drugs to take you under. Don't fight it, don't resist... just sleep. In the morning, we will be safe."

86. "Being lost in the woods isn't ideal."

87. "An injection of valium will do it."

88. "There's no anesthesia."

89. "Wouldn't it be great if we never met each other?"

90. "Bless you." "I didn't sneeze." "Yeah right. Now go sit down, you're sick."

91. "It's called insomnia you dim-wit."

92. "Join me and we can be great."

93. "You didn't bring me here for the cake." "No, dear, but you are so gullible. I brought you here for a sacrifice." "My life?" "Why yes."

94. "I don't know. I never had someone collapse on my doorstep before."

95. "I have nothing to lose. No family, no friends, just my meaningless life."

96. "That's my daughter, not the villain's... so give me her back before I rip your eyes out."

97. "How long was I out for?!" "Ten minutes, but you were drifting. I don't think you had that good of rest." "Oh, I thought I was asleep for hours."

98. "I know, I know you are going to hate me after this, but trust me when I say it's for the best."

99. "I know everything about you."

100. "I think narcissism is contagious because after watching you for a couple hours, I think I may have developed a little crush on the mirror..."

101. "What did you give me?"

102. "Is she screams, I'm going to scream, and then we are going to die."

103. "No fighting today, my cat just died."

104. "How hard did you punch me?"

105. "Not gonna lie, being delirious was epic."

106. "I am cooking for you. You aren't my servant, so stop thinking it."

107. "My old masters made me into a weapon and called me Villain, but if you desire a lapdog I am going to need to be refurnished to fit your needs."

108. "What is his deal?" "I think he's just crazy."

109. "Love is not what I had in mind when I agreed to go on a date with you."

110. "Hugs are overrated."

111. "Are you too hot or too cold?" "Both."

112. "I wish we could turn back time."

113. "I lost the game." "What do you mean? Hero is dead." "Precisely."

114. "Make a wish." "That you live."

115. "Villain has been acting exceptional! Today we granted them a break from the machine. Go ahead Hero and take him for some ice cream."

116. (Sleepy murmurs) "Don't go. I neeeed you." "Yeah yeah I know Villain."

117. "Villain was the one who hurt me, not Hero."

118. "Supervillain is in danger!"

119. "If everyone is scared of me, I might as well be alone."

120. "My head is killing me."

121. "Don't call an ambulance. Just... hold me."

122. "You don't have to do this. It's going to hurt you more than me." "Anything for you dearest, anything at all."

123. "Hero, go wash your hands before dinner."

124. "You have PTSD?" "I don't know?"

125. "I have soap in my eyes!' "Rinse it out." "Mm no I'm permanently mortally blinded." "Uh huh."

126. "We need to cuddle to keep warm."

127. "Take care of them for me, will you?"

128. "When I'm gone, promise to tell my mother, please."

129. "Drug him and then bring him to me."

130. "Superheroes are for children. In all honesty, we are all villains."

131. "Oh my gosh, Hero, what happened?" "Poisoned."

132. "Wouldn't it be nice?" "I don't fancy prosthetics."

133. "Just shut up and listen!"

134. "There is a memorial parade for Hero tomorrow. They asked you to lead it."

135. "She turned it around... at the end."

136. "I wish that he understood how much I care for him."

137. "Civilian! He fell asleep in my lap last night, like totally zooted. It was so cute, but also very tempting. I stuck a french fry up his nose." "Wow. Did he wake up then?" "Yeah, I am sorta kidnapped right now..."

138. "The book, the sword... all pieces of the puzzle huh." "No, darling, all pieces of my game."

139. "Their death is my fault! Not your's, but mine, so quit trying to make me feel better."

140. "Once upon a time-" "Oh please, not another fairytale."

141. "If only it was that easy."

142. "We are stuck in a maze, how can you be so joyful?"

143. "Celebrate Hero, eat your cake, party into the night... but just know, I will be back."

144. "Call 911!" "Why?" "I stubbed my toe."

145. "Your jawline looks like it was gauzed over in lard." "It looks better than your hay for hair."

146. "You're my best friend." "Villain? Are you on drugs?"

147. "Lay him there and leave him. Let the rats dine on him."

148. "The point of the cow suit?" "Oh, uh, I was at a Halloween parade. You know, for children."

149. "I-i never wanted to hurt you." "I know, I wanted you to, so I allowed it."

150. "Favorite movie?" "Your death." "Ooo never heard of it, let's watch it." "*groans* Oh my gosh, you are stupid."

151. "Being a flutist is my only superpower. And being modest apparently."

152. "Your head will join my collection if yoi don't watch out."

153. "Hey, hey! Wake up, buddy. It's just a nightmare."

154. "Meh head hurts." "Yeah, you hit it pretty hard."

155. "Let's go for a ride." "On that yellow miniature school bus?" "It's a ranger you idiot."

156. "No painkillers, no bandages, perfect environment for infection to settle... I'm just gonna leave you here Villain."

157. "I save you and this is how you repay me? A prison?"

158. "What are you doing?" "Climbing a tree? No Hero, I am breaking into your house to kidnap you."

159. "I formally apologize."

160. "Of all places, Hero, you had to teleport us to a desert. A DESERT."

161. "Supervillain won't stop unless we team up." "I don't think our alliance will stop them, I think it'll just make them angrier."

162. "Stop singing or I will blow this place until even the last atom is broken into itty-bitty molecules!" "That... that is scientifically impossible."

163. "I'm a genius! Yippee!"

164. "Life isn't perfect and nor is your morals."

165. "Control yourself before you kill everyone around you."

166. "Say your goodbyes."

167. "Of all the ways I've died, drowning was by far the nicest."

168. "Love the collar. Is it for fashion purposes?" "Uh, um, uh, er, no?"

169. "You look lonely. Want some hot coco?"

170. "It is negative million out there and you expect me to come in toasty warm after fixing your power?"

171. "Are you sick?" "Yeh." "Come on in then."

172. "Civilian, don't even bother trying to save him."

173. "We have a breach!"

174. "What makes a villain's life less important than your's?"

175. "Enjoy your soup." "You poisoned it." "And you're delusional, eat up."

176. "I hate 99% of the population." "According to a meme I found, you are therefore a cat."

177. "Don't overuse your powers."

178. "This is just an unfortunate event."

179. "You look so cute when you are sleepy and barely conscious."

180. "His fever is rising."

181. "Save her, leave me. I'll-i'll get out of this somehow."

182. "Sometimes self-sacrifice isn't noble, it's selfish."

183. "You are so funny that I need my inhaler to kill you with." "That sentence was so discombobulated that I am leaving."

184. "Just for your information, I hate oranges but love grapes."

185. "Walking down the stairs shouldn't be a momental effort." "You broke both your legs."

186. "You just destroyed my life's work, don't expect me to give you a huge bear hug."

187. "Is it true that you have telekinesis?" "Yes, why?" "Go steal me a donut."

188. "You are so incredibly touch starved, Villain." "Mmm." "Tired? Go ahead and sleep, I'm here."

189. "This is for your own good, I promise."

190. "I'm cold."

191. "I don't want to move and you can't make me."

192. "I AM RETIRED! YOU DON'T NEED TO CONTINUE TO SEND ME PAMPHLETS OF THE HOTTEST HERO OF THE YEAR!"

193. "He's unconscious." "That tired, huh." "No, he passed out from blood loss."

194. "I want a kitten."

195. "I'm no scared of you, so stop acting like I am."

196. "He isn't dangerous, just scared."

197. "They won't be going anywhere for a long, long time."

198. "Hero? Hero? Oh my goodness, please wake up."

199. "Life is too short for pleasures."

200. "I hope you are happy, in the end."

#heros and villains #ask game #200 followers #thank you so much

[enchantedblackrose]

All the Pieces Pt 3

Gif not mine. Full credit to the owner. Taken from Google Images

All the Pieces

Sirius Black/Fem Reader

Warnings: unedited, mild language, alcohol consumption, brief mentions of underage drinking, small mention of bullying. Lengthy author's notes at the end. Also this was a huge PIA to write so hopefully it doesn't read too disconnected

Part 1|| Part 2|| Part 4|| Part 5

Part 3 of ?

When you touch me gently I remember how you know And the sun shines rings around your smile And I'm here laughing like a child -Pieces, Dan Powell

If it was any other person on your doorstep, you'd probably berate them for inducing that almost heart attack you just experienced. Instead you grab the familiar face by the sleeve of his worn jacket, pulling him into your living room.

"I could deck you, Remus John Lupin. I thought someone came for him. Ugh. Come here." Your arms wrap  around him for a tight hug, which he returns. "He's here, Remus. He's safe." You feel Remus let out a deep sigh of relief. Pulling away, you look at him with gentle scrutiny, knowing what a toll last night took on him. "You look awful. Did you walk far? You should've told me you were coming. I could have met you."

Remus shakes his head. "I caught a train and apparated most of the way."

"Stop fussing over him, y/n. Let the poor man get past the door."  Sirius's teasing voice calls out from behind you; no doubt his canine ears allowed him to hear the familiar voice even through the closed bedroom door and knew it was safe to come down.

The two men embrace; this encounter being much more relaxed than their last. No Peter, no warranted need for revenge, no threat of execution.

As you all stand in your living room, a haunting thought hits you: you three are it, the last of your true friends. Peter is the traitor. You suppress a shudder, swearing to make the most of this moment.

"You know," you say with a grin, "I happen to have a large bottle of firewhisky. Fancy a drink, boys?" Sirius's grin mirrors your own. Remus has a small tentative smile, but it's all the encouragement you need to send you to the kitchen to fetch the bottle.

The small, quaint kitchen appears even smaller with the disregarded dishes from breakfast still sitting out on your table. The sight causes a small frown to appear on your face. All the rest of the morning and most of your afternoon had been lost to the unplanned nap with Sirius. You fill your sink with soap and hot water. A few flicks of your wand and your dirty dishes are submerged in the water, scrubbed, and rinsed. The process begins again as now clean plates make their way to the drying rack, which is concerning because you dont believe you cast a spell for that. Confused, you turn to see Remus in the kitchen. He winks and wordlessly reaches your top cabinet without so much of a stretch to retrieve the bottle of firewhisky. You follow him back to the livingroom, toting three glasses.

"Cheers to freedom," you say once everyone has a full glass, "and to being reunited with old friends."

"You hear that, Remus? She thinks we're old." You roll your eyes good naturedly. Remus rests a hand on Sirius's shoulder, giving it a brotherly pat. "We are old," he says simply, before all three of you raise your glasses to your lips, sipping at the burning liquid. You each settle comfortably in your living room. Remus sits in the armchair, leaving the overstuffed couch for Sirius and you. You sit at an end, while he opts for the middle seat, but in a respectable distance of your space. The bottle of alcohol sits in arms reached on the coffee table.

"I thought you swore off this stuff y/n." Remus says with a twinkle in his eye as he takes another drink from his glass. "You know, considering your history with it.." You groan and Sirius throws his head back in laughter.

"I almost forgot," Sirius says breathlessly from laughing. "Was that seventh year?"

"Sixth. Just before we got together. I suppose I was trying to impress you," you tell him.

"You matched me drink for drink that night."

"Which was mad seeing how I never had a drink before. I spent all next morning and afternoon in bed, throwing up. It was awful."

"You're forgetting the best part," Remus interjects.

"Dancing on top of that old table in the Shrieking Shack, singing the chorus of "Rock and Roll all Nite" at the top of my lungs was far from the best part. I only wish I could forget it."

"That wasn't singing, love. More like cats dying," Sirius quips while he and Remus laugh. You say nothing, well aware how accurate the description fits. You take a long drink from your glass.

"Yes, well as, uh, entertaining as that moment was, I wasn't referring to it," says Remus. You look at him questioningly. "Have you forgotten sneaking into the Slytherin boys' dorm, stealing all their robes, turning them hot pink, changing the crest to a mountain troll, and then returning them to the dorm?"

"Oh,  Merlin. That was the same night wasn't it? James had never been so keen on lending me his invisibility cloak until I concocted that plan!" The two men laugh and you join in.

"You know most of my other friends thought I was strange for being into muggle music." You say as the laughter dies down.

"Lily shouldn't have?" Sirius asks after he swallows his drink.

"No. You're forgetting Lily and I weren't friends first. We didn't really talk or hang out until she and James started dating."

"That's right. I forgot. I remember the two of you constantly together."

"Because we bonded over you two idiots. Prior to that, she never came out and said it, but I think she thought I was daft hanging around you lot most of the time. The other girls were more forgiving, but they had crushes on you all." You give a careless shrug. It was no secret how sought after the boys had been in their schooldays.

"I never quite understood how you became friends with us," Remus says.

"It was easy with you. You were so nice, calm, dependable, and not obnoxious. Peter…" you pause, choosing words carefully, not wanting present feelings to influence memories. "He was quiet and lonely. Pretty much agreeable. Again, easy. James and Sirius? I was determined to never speak to either after that boat ride our first night."

"We saved your life that night!" Sirius interjects.

"You two were the reason it needed saving! Standing up in a fucking boat because you two saw whatever in the lake. James knocking me overboard in the process."

"It was a giant squid and we rescued you."

You roll your eyes. "I was drenched, freezing and completely mortified. And as apologetic as James was, he kept calling me the wrong name." You all laugh. 

"It wasn't until second year that I thought they might be okay. We had already become friends," you say looking at Remus. "I missed about a week of classes due to acute bronchitis. You spent time with me afterwards, helping me catch up. When you missed later that month, I was ready to return the favor."

Remus nods, remembering the time fondly. "You were an excellent note taker. Much better than the other three."

"Did you even take notes?" You ask with a playful glance to Sirius.

"In second year? Probably not." He grins ever so cheekily. You shake your head, but are smiling.

"So we became friends and you befriended James and Sirius by default?" Remus muses.

Sirius feigns hurt. "Are you implying we were some sort of consolation prize?"

"Actually," you interject, "They saved me once again. A group of four older boys were harassing me, just dumb taunts and knocking my books out from my hands. They came right over, not caring about being outnumbered. Got the gits to leave me alone. James finally learned my name and I realized Potter and Black weren't so awful after all."

"Those guys were jerks. It didn't sit well with us to see anyone bullied like that."

"Unless of course it was Snape," you counter.

"That was different," Sirius's free hand clenches into a fist as he takes a hard drink.

Remus is quick to change the subject. "Do you still have that remembrall?"

"The one we enchanted to go red only for James? Mhm! It's at my flat in the city."

"Do you mean our flat?" Sirius asks.

Your smile falters. "No. Sirius. I got a different place. After…everything. It was too hard."

A deafening silence falls. Each of you taking long sips from your glasses.

"Oh!" You jump up suddenly, which given your somewhat inebriated state is not the brightest idea. You stumble slightly, but Sirius steadies you, grabbing you by your hips. His fingers linger and your eyes meet. You lose yourself; for a moment you're sixteen again and his touch is more intoxicating than the alcohol. His gaze tells you he feels the same.

Remus clears his throat loudly before taking a drink from his glass.

"Thanks," you mumble, setting your glass on the table.

Sirius releases you from his grasp, though you still feel the ghost of his touch. "'Tis no trouble, darling." You sense his eyes on you as you disappear from the room, heading upstairs. Your head is buzzing, but you blame that on the alcohol…

You return downstairs to the living room, the fetched item tucked securely out of sight under your arm, and find the boys, men talking with easy smiles. It makes you so happy to witness and spend this time together. Your presence has their full attention.

"Follow me, please." You fill your glass with more firewhisky. Sirius mimics the gesture and offers Remus a refill, but he just shakes his head no and silently indicates to the liquid still in his glass. You grab your wand and lead your little group outside to the backyard. The sun sits low in the west, the sky becoming more plum and black than pink and gold. Buckbeak sits on the ground near your shed, one wing tucked over its head.

You hand Sirius your wand and then produce his prisoner robes. He laughs and even Remus looks as if he approves. Sirius waves your wand and the dingy, tattered garment is set ablaze. 

After a while, you all make your way back inside. You prepare a light dinner and the eating and drinking continue with more laughs and shared memories. Hours pass. The contents of the bottle nearly drained signal the night coming to an end.

"I'm one drink away from dancing on tabletops and singing, or, screeching some A-ha, or something equally as embarrassing." you laugh. "I'm going to bed. Remus, I offered Sirius your room, but you're welcome to the couch. There are blankets and pillows in the hall closet." 

"Thank you, y/n. But I should be going."

"What? No. Stay. I insist. I need to see your bemused face sipping tea when I come downstairs with a bloody hangover and you're just fine."

Remus grins. "I hate depriving you both of such a moment, but I have an appointment tomorrow morning. I've already rented a room." You frown but don't press the issue any more. "Though if you don't mind, I thought I'd travel by floo."

"Of course. Help yourself. Powder is on the mantle." You hug him close and kiss his cheek. You excuse yourself, giving the other two time to say goodbye.

As you head for the bathroom, you pause hearing their low voices.

"I'm so sorry, old friend, for believing you... betrayed them. I should have known better. I-"

"There's nothing to forgive. I doubted you, too. The war made us all fear the worst.."

Mentally, you chastise yourself for eavesdropping and begin washing your face.

Sirius has made his way upstairs. In passing his room, you say goodnight. You're about to close the door to your bedroom when he calls your name and you turn to see him stepping towards you. Without warning his lips crash down on yours. Your fingers intertwine in his dark curls at the nape of his neck as you let the kiss deepen. His hands grip your waist and he hoists you up off your feet with little effort just as he did many times all those years ago. Your legs wrap themselves around his waist as he carries you to your bed. He drops you gently and only breaks the kiss to look at you. Still hovering over you, his gray eyes search your face for the answer to an unasked question. You nod in response, but he continues to gaze at you longing to hear you say it.

"I want you."

A slow breath of relief leaves him and his mouth finds its way back to yours. 

The night ends with two former lovers once again completely losing themselves in a perfect moment.

//

There's an unspoken understanding that the night you and Sirius shared together was more than a drunken hookup after a long night of reminiscing. But you don't repeat the night, though you share your bed with him. Nights are hard for him. Sleep doesn't always come easy and he often wakes in the middle of the night screaming, or panicked with sweat pouring off his body. But your presence brings him a comfort he can't otherwise achieve. And so, you spend your night together in your bed. Sleeping.

As days turn into weeks, a comfortable routine has set. Remus visits about once a week. Surprisingly, Sirius has taken to caring for your garden. You go into town as needed and you and Sirius cook dinner together most nights. Buckbeak, now known as Witherwings per a letter from Hagrid that reached Sirius, roams your yard freely, occasionally taking flight in the safety of the countryside night skies, always returning by daybreak. As precautions for the hippogriff and Sirius you casted Protego totalum over the cottage and yards. 

During this time together, Sirius learns how you took over your parents' shop*, how you've taken on a promising young woman who mostly looks after it, leaving you to spend more time here at the cottage, which also belonged to your parents. With tears in your eyes, you told him how they died months apart just over two years ago. He comforted you, remembering them both fondly and told you they'd be proud of you.

The day is still young when you tell him you have to go to the shop to take inventory. Before you leave you call out to him.

"Since it looks like rain, can you please go through some of your things in the attic?"

"Yes, dear," he uses the term mockingly and you playfully glare back at him.

"Try not to burn the place down while I'm gone." With that, you close the door behind you.

It's late afternoon when you return home. Sirius is waiting for you. A midnight blue box in his hand.

"Will you marry me, y/n?"

*a/n: I kept this vague so you can imagine a shop that fits your personality/likes/whatever. I'll only specify this later if needed for storylines. I wanted something where you could be allotted time off easily. Personally I imagine maybe an apothecary? Or maybe an antique shop. What about you?

2: I'm thinking of writing a prequel? More like blurbs, highlighting moments between you and Sirius. But I need to know what you want to read. First engagement? First kiss? When Sirius realizes he's in love? Time at Hogwarts? Post Hogwarts but pre Azkaban?

Taglist <3:  @oingo233 @marimorena06 @medalloway-blog

#sirius x y/n #sirius x you #sirius black x reader #adult sirius #harry potter fanfic #sirius black fanfiction

[pennypalblorkposts]

Hampsterdance hyperfixation?

ok ok i know me being fixated on a song about dancing hampsters is very strange but theres actually a ton of underground lore about hampsterdance thats been obscured for decades due to hampsterdance (the brand/band) tanking in popularity after its one hit wonder single in 2000

[ID: a doodle of a person with short hair, looking very excited, with a thought bubble containing the word "Hampter" over their head. end ID]

1. this is probably more well known thanks to this video and also due to me talking about it with random strangers all the time but hampsterdance had a straight-to-dvd movie called "how the hampster's saved winter" that's a piece of lost media (which isn't a new thing for this franchise) due to barely anybody ordering it off the website. the only reason we know it exists it thanks to an article from 2019 of someone interviewing the guys who own the hampsterdance brand (yes, brand!!) and web archives of the website (and the dead purchase link on it.) as well as screencaps from a now dead flash game (which i have saved thankfully pre flash dying) which includes a ferret which is just making me want to find it even more, even if it's just a shitty christmas movie

2. i'm gonna follow up on the hampsterdance movie kind of by explaining what i mean by brand. it's well known info (and if you dont know this thats ok) that the original website was made by an art student named deidre lacarte in 98 in a competition with her friend and sister to make a site with the most web traffic. well, after the hit single "hampsterdance", in around 2002ish? the trademark to it was bought by abatis inc. who still currently holds the trademark. and also they're the ones behind this fucking 3d redesign of the main 4 (i blame alvin for this one personally :/)

[ID: a set of two images. the first image contains a 2D drawing of a yellow hamster with a bowtie, a brown hamster with a cowboy hat, a grey hamster and an orange hamster. the second image contains a 3D rendered version of the four hamsters with names beside them, as well as instruments. a brown hamster with a cowboy hat named Dixie, holding a guitar, an orange hamster with goggles named Fuzzy with a pair of drums, a yellow hamster with a bowtie named Hampton with a guitar, and a grey hamster with a yin and yang symbol named Hado with an electric keyboard. she also has a flower on her ear. end ID]

like.. i love their current designs now despite how Interesting they look, but what we had already was perfect.

3. there's actually a niche community of hampsterdance fans and there has been for decades! there's an official forum that exists and that's still active (last i checked a few months ago) if you wanna make an account on it good luck getting it approved, it took my account a good year i think :(. so i guess my hampsterdance fixation isnt that strange even if it's mainly focusing on the backstory of this entire franchise vs the actual characters themselves (id probably fixate on the characters if i actually got my hands on that damn movie)

4. hampsterdance has actually made songs outside of its one hit wonder. it has a few albums also!! you can find some of the songs on youtube as well as some of the other music videos ;)

5. official merchandising of the hampsters exists, and yes, im qualifying that as lost media. this includes shirts, rubber bands, and lollipops strangely enough. also plushies of the main cast (unfortunately in the reboot style). also a mug i regret not buying when i saw it for 20 bucks on ebay </3

[ID: an image of four pairs of red lollipops, each with the face of the hampsterdance cast on them. in order: an orange hamster with goggles and some necklaces, a yellow hamster with a bowtie, a grey hamster with flowers beside her ear, and a brown hamster with a cowboy hat on her head. end ID]

6. hampton (the main hampster, the guy with the bowtie, the man who started it all) was named after deidre's hamster who had the same name. he was featured a few times on the website after it went through a few updates (aka going from literal gif hell to an actual website with things to do on it).

thank you mr hampton for inspiring millions of people by existing. and also promoting hamster care for two decades. youve done a lot for us (actual image of him below)

[ID: a small, low quality image of a real life hamster in a cage. the cage has a pink bottom. the hamster is orange with a white belly. end ID]

7. i bet you're curious why hampsterdance is spelled with a p. well, according to hampton hampster (fictional), he named himself that because unlike hamsters (without a p), he was no ordinary hamster. in actuality this was probably a misspelling of hamster that just ended up sticking, but i do think that little in universe explanation is very cute.

i could go on but this post is long enough as is. i highly recommend going on the wayback machine through all the hampsterdance urls (hampsterdance.com, hampsterdance2.com) if you're really curious about how hampsterdance (the website) has changed so much. or you could ask me 😏😏😏

#sorry if im a bit all over the place so is my interest in this damn thing #i fell down a rabbit hole in 2019 and i havent managed to find my way out sinc #e #hampsterdance #hampster dance #long post #im not good with image transcriptions but ill try and add some onto this in an edit #penny posts #ok to rb/interact #hamsters #food #sorry forgot to tag that #edit: added image descriptions rb this version if u can

[heavenfell-au]

Okay so, i'm taking my time to write you this... In the best english i can uummm, so around april i've fall into a coma bc of a very bad meds error, they gave me too much valium oh heh i forgot to say that i am in a hospital for soul since 5 years and this year was the WORST i had 27 f* meds by days every day and very strong one to turn me into a zombie.. they send me to 2 different hospital while i was just dying everyday a little bit more, i should complain to the police and SH* but i have nothing to show and my voice as a patient is not taking serious yeaah that suck, but why am i complaining about my life to you ? And you in particuliar ? For one art piece you made. This one with frisk in a hospital bed surronded by papyrus and sans i'm talking about the firts one not the remade ( who is Amazing btw ) this art.. i was thinking of it a lot between the pain and every shame i had to face, in my head i wanted to fight just like frisk did and get out of this urgent Care unity but it took me a while and my mind was still focus on your art it gave me a f* lot of power and finally i was able to go out around may but i'm still in the hospital for 2 months and will get finally freedom soon yay ! So i have to thanks you for this piece of art who nearly saved my life. I think that, an artist can have a real impact on someone life with they art just like music or any form for art but i guess you know it.. now i only have 4 pills by days, i have a nice life way better than before and its part bc of you, i've know about your arms and i'm sorry i hope you will be free from this pain soon ! Also i just have a request, can you please post my Ask on your blog ? It's not for peoples to Come tell me 'omg poor you' i want peoples to know that they art, passion, anything they share can help anyone in any time of they're life, it's precious, i hope you get the message and that i didn't waste your time it could it be longer with more detail but i have my phone only 2h by day so it was a bit hard to find the time ! Well have a good day my fav artist ! With luv - Castielsan

Merci

I'm glad you survived, Castiel. I really do. Thank you for holding on despite all the shit you're going through. And the fact that my creation helped you somehow really hits a spot, thank you so much for sharing this.

Take care of yourself. You deserve to have a healthy and happy life.

[lovemalecforever]

Chapter 4

Confrontations and Truths

It was almost 5:30, the dusk was setting in as Alec walked out of his office, mumbling something under his breath. He looked around to find a taxi which he got after 5 minutes, then got in and left for Catarina's house.

*At Catarina's apartment*

Catarina was pacing in her living room, glancing at the clock again and again. Her worries were deepening with each passing second when her doorbell rang. Sighing, she waved her hands and opened the door.

Alec walked inside and gave her an apologetic look. "Sorry, Cat! I'm.... 15 minutes late." He said while hugging her gently.

"That's not what I'm concerned about Alec, you asked me to meet you urgently and not tell Magnus about our meeting at all, what's going on!?"

He was about to answer when a soft voice echoed the whole house.

"Aallleeecccc!"

Madzie came running down the hall and hugged Alec's leg who was around Alec's waist height now. She was growing faster and learned a lot in all these years. Catarina had officially adopted her, and they formed a really great bond over the course of years.

A wide smile appeared on Alec's face as he bent down to her height and gave her a tight hug. "Hey, sweet pea!"

"Magnus didn't come?" She asked in a sad voice.

"No, sweet pea, I had some important work with your mom, that's why I came. We'll surely come soon to meet you, okay?"

"Okay!" she said enthusiastically, her sadness completely gone.

"Hey Mads! Go to your room sweetheart, we have some important work to discuss." Catarina said to her softly but a slight tone of worry was visible in her voice.

"Okay mommy, bye Alecc!"

"Bye, sweet pea!"

After she left, Catarina sighed, crossed her arms above her chest, and glared at Alec. "Alec! Are you going to tell me what's going on?"

"Cat! Calm down, can we please sit and talk?"

Catarina sighed yet again. They walked towards her mini balcony where there was a coffee table with two wooden chairs placed around it. She waved her hands and summoned a hot coffee for herself and hot chocolate with marshmallows for Alec.

"Thank you!" Alec said as he sat down on the chair.

Catarina was still looking at him firmly.

"So, to answer your question, Magnus is not fine."

"What!? Alec! What happened to him, has his powers-"

"Cat! Cat! Calm down! There's nothing wrong with him. He's completely fine, he's just not fine emotionally."

"Emotionally!?"

"Look, Cat, it's our anniversary in 6 days, I want to do something for him for which I'll be needing the help of a warlock, and I obviously can't take Magnus' help, so that's why I wanted to meet you."

Catarina let out a breath of relief, which she didn't know was holding. "Alec, I'm still confused, how is Magnus' mental health and your surprise plan related?"

Alec took a deep breath and composed himself before speaking. "You're aware of the biggest attack that happened in Alicante about a month ago, which almost resulted in war?"

"Yes, Alec, I obviously am, that's the reason I'm in Alicante. They needed the powerful warlocks from around the globe to fix the broken wards, you know it really well those are no ordinary wards. But, what about it?" a frown appeared on her forehead, not understanding where this was headed.

"Well, in that attack, I was in the field and Magnus was also called. It was not a small attack so they called everyone that can fight that battle. We both were on the field fighting side by side, but..." Alec cleared his throat, his eyes starting to flood with tears with those memories.

"Alec?" Catarina asked softly.

Alec closed his eyes and a teardrop fell on his cheek. "I... I almost died in that battle."

"What!?" Catarina's eyes went wide. "Oh my god! Alec... why nobody told me about this!? Why am I hearing about it now?"

"You were at the Spiral Labyrinth, Cat. We wouldn't be able to contact you even if we wanted. And, you know Magnus, he hates talking about things like these."

Catarina sighed and gave a slow nod.

"Anyways, I was in a coma for 10 days. My recovery was really slow, but I recovered. I knew Magnus was by my side the whole time, I was able to hear him, hear everything happening beside me, I heard him crying, begging me to wake up, to not leave him this soon, that... he won't be able to live without me, he cried on my arms, didn't sleep for a day!" He paused as tears kept running down his face.

Catarina gently squeezed his arms.

"When I recovered and went back home, he didn't allow me to go back to work for days. I had to convince him, remind him that I'm an inquisitor, I don't have that much fieldwork now, but... he never was able to get over it." He took a deep breath and continued.

"He told me he was fine, but I know he's not Cat! He still cries at night, thinking I'm asleep and not hearing him. whenever I've come home early, I've heard him crying, saying things like... like I'll die someday in a battle or I'll grow old one day and die and leave him forever. But I've always ignored it, knowing that I won't be able to comfort him no matter how hard I try to. And also, because he thinks he's hiding from me. If I confront him, he'll become defensive and more secretive, he'll push me away."

He closed his eyes and let out a deep breath. Catarina reached out and gave his shoulder a light squeeze. When he opened his eyes, tears were shining brightly in them.

"I... I can't see him like that, Cat! He had a past full of pain, he had been in and out of relationships, had bad ones like Camille. You know all about it better than me, I know he's scared that I'll grow old one day and die. My mortality is scaring him, I love him and I'm worried about him."

"Oh my! Alec... I can't believe Magnus didn't say a word to me. But how can I help you with this?"

"I... Is... I... I... Is...."

"Alec!?" Catarina frowned, her mind going only in one direction with Alec's confrontation.

"I want to become immortal!" He announced.

At first, Catarina's eyes went wide, but then a light smile appeared on her face. "Look, Alec, I'm happy to see the love you have for Magnus, but becoming immortal-"

"It's not just for Magnus, Cat! I'm doing it for myself as well. I want to be with Magnus forever. I can't think of being apart from him even for a day, and, about watching my whole family dying in front of my eyes, with Magnus being by my side, I know I'll handle it!"

Catarina was so awestruck by his determination. 'Magnus is really lucky to have Alec, I'm so happy for you Magnus Bane!' she thought. "But there's one more problem, Alec, you have pure angel blood running in your veins, if you want to become immortal-"

"You think I came without homework, Cat!?" He took out a piece of paper from his pants pocket and kept it on the table. She took it and carefully opened it but then her eyes went wide.

"Wha... Alec, from where did you get this?"

"I was looking through the history of Shadowhunters and Immortals when I got this. The only thing I got to know this far is that," he pointed at the sketch on paper, "his name was Kasper Windermere, the first Shadowhunter to become immortal, half angel and half Shadowhunter, he became half-angel through a spell, but I'm not able to find the rest of it."

Catarina's eyes were wide. Noticing that, Alec took her hand in his catching her attention.

"Look, Cat, I want to become immortal, but Shadowhunting is my life, my career, it's what I've taught since childhood, I can't just give up on it. And I know I'll regret if I become immortal by using demon blood, you all know me. So that's the only option I have. Please, help me Cat!"

She couldn't help but give a wide smile at Alec.

"What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

"You know, Magnus has been my best friend for centuries, I've seen him falling in and out of love, being with people, caring for them, and getting heartbroken but I've never seen anyone caring for Magnus the way you do. Magnus is really lucky to have you in his life. I'm really happy for both of you."

Alec's cheeks flushed red at this. "Thank you, Cat!"

"But for what you want, we need to search in every place possible. We can start with Book of White; Magnus gave it to me to keep it safe, I'll bring it."

"Okay, let's do it."

-----------------------------------------------------------------

* A Few hours later*

"There's only a small part of the spell mentioned in it, Alec." Catarina rubbed her temples as she turned the book towards Alec. They searched for hours but were only able to find a few details.

"Hmm... but that means it's possible right? We just need to find the rest of it." He was really happy with their findings.

"Alec, are you really sure? There's little mention of it, and... it's written there that it has consequences, that's why it's removed."

"What consequences?" He frowned.

"This spell is irreversible, so you can never turn back to mortal ever again and the only means that can kill you is.... is your own will, as an angel you'll only die when you desire to be."

"How is the other one a consequence?" He asked, confused.

"Alec, no one desires to die, and there's no mention whether Kasper Windermere is alive or dead."

"I don't see any problem with any of the above!"

Catarina sighed. "You are so determined, aren't you?"

"Cat, I can't see Magnus like this anymore. With our anniversary coming, I want to surprise him in the best way possible. I want our anniversary to be about him, his happiness, and I know he'll be happy, so yes, I'm determined to do anything which will make him happy. I'll look for more information tomorrow at Gard's library."

Catarina grinned then out of nowhere, giving him a tight hug. "Magnus Bane is a hell of a lucky man!"

Alec pulled out of the hug but then his eyes fell on his watch, it was 10:30. "Shit! Oh, no! Shit! Shit!"

"Alec, what happened?"

"We planned a dinner at 7 today and it's 10:30, Magnus is going to kill me, I need to run!" He said in a hurried tone.

Catarina laughed and shook her head. "Go, get your husband Alec!"

"Bye, Cat!" With that, Alec rushed out of Catarina's house.

__________________________

Magnus was pacing in their living room, eyeing the cold food kept at the kitchen counter and at the clock alternatively. It was almost 10:45. His eyes were filled with the pool of tears that were ready to shed at any moment.

'Where are you, Alexander? You promised you'd make it for dinner.' He sighed and started pacing again when a sudden thought struck him. 'Is... Is he all right? Did something happen to him? Did he go for the hunt? No, No! But he should be home by now then!'

He was about to change into his regular clothes to go out in search of him when he heard the jingle of keys and the door opened making him let out a breath of relief.

Alec walked in and noticed that Magnus was standing in the center of the living room with worry-filled eyes. 'Shit! I'm screwed' he thought then cleared his throat before speaking.

"I'm sorry, Magnus, I... Umm... I...." He kept shuffling in his place, unable to meet the eyes with his husband's.

"Where were you, Alexander?" Magnus almost choked on his words.

Alec noticed this, 'he was crying again, shit! I'm sorry Mags. Just a few more days and you never have to worry about it ever again' he thought.

"I... I was actually with Izzy; she was at the meeting too... I met her after a long time, so after we were both done with our work and meetings we decided to meet for a coffee. We met and started chatting and didn't realize the time. I'm sorry Mags! I should've texted you, I forgot, I'm really sorry." He said half truthfully, Izzy was at the meeting, but she was in a hurry so they only talked for 5 minutes, then she left but she's still in Alicante.

He then took out the flower bouquet he was hiding the whole time, with a sorry card placed on top of it. "I hope this will make up for it, I'm so sorry Magnus!"

Magnus was completely on the verge of crying right now, he was trying to hold his tears back, as he kept glancing between the bouquet and his husband. 'I missed my chance again, how am I supposed to say anything when you keep doing things like this' he thought, unable to keep his tears back he started crying.

"Magnus!?" Alec kept the bouquet on the couch then hugged him tightly. "I'm sorry Magnus, I'm sorry!" 'I know why you're crying Magnus, please don't be scared love, just a few more days!'

Magnus cried on Alec's shoulders, holding his jacket in his fists tightly. 'how am I supposed to tell you, Alexander, how am I supposed to tell you that... that I want to end our marriage, that I want to end us. I can't take it anymore, thinking that you'll be gone forever someday, and I, I'll have to live with those memories. I can't create more memories with you, Alexander. What happened a month ago had hurt me in ways you can't imagine. I can't do this anymore, the more I'll be with you, the more it'll hurt me when you'll be gone. I won't be able to bear that pain, I have to end us, I need to end us, but how am I even going to say it, when you keep showering me with your love' he cried harder on his shoulders.

#happily married #malec forever #malec fic #magnus bane #malec #asaab #angst with a happy ending #angst #fanfic authors #alec lightwood #fanfiction #fanfic #lightwood bane family #fantasy #wattpad writer #wattpad

[paradox-psyc-hoe-sis]

5 + 1; Bucky Barnes

(Five times Bucky Barnes almost kissed you, plus the one time that he did)

Bucky x reader, avengers x reader ,(platonic)

Warnings: a lil bit of swearing :)

Word count: 4.4 k (I'm sorry)

A/n: I LOVED WRITING THIS SO MUCH! I'm back at it again with my obsession with James Barnes, so here it is. Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoy it! - Aphrodite :))

(1) "C'mon James, you need to go to bed!" Bucky was sprawled out on the sofa in the Avengers common area, face pale and clammy. You had been with the avengers for a year, and Bucky was definitely the person you were closest with. You didn't know if you saw him as a brother, a best friend or even something more, but you both definitely felt connected.

"Y/n," he groaned, "I'm fine. I've survived Russian medical tests and torture, a little cold is something I can handle." He sniffed and wiped his nose on a tissue, putting it into his jumper pocket. He looked seriously in pain, his forehead sparked beads of sweat and his eyes looked tired, almost hollow.

"Firstly, it's not a cold, it's the flu." You stated, picking up a few stray tissues and throwing them into the bin a few meters away. "Secondly, if you don't go to bed now I will carry you, and God knows neither of us want that." You glared at him, expression stern with your hands on your hips.

"Good god, you're beginning to turn into Steve." He muttered, rising from the sofa. Heaving in pain, you put his arm over your shoulders and helped him to his room.

Once you got to Bucky's room, he sat on the edge of the bed. You stayed at the door, holding onto the door frame. "Right, change into your pyjamas and get comfy in bed. I'm going to the medical bay to get you some cold & flu meds, a thermometer and a glass of water. I'll be back in two secs."

Once you left, Bucky took off his jumper and sweats, to be left in a black tank top and his boxers. He flopped into bed, pulling the blanket up to his waist. You returned after a few minutes, not bothering to knock on the door. You spend more time in his room than yours, and you knew he didn't mind your presence.

Panting, you set down a small glass of water and a box of tablets, holding a small thermometer and cloth in the other hand. He looked up at you, puzzled at your breathlessness.

"Ran into Tony...on the way...had to run away...so he wouldn't ask me why...I had medicine and stuff." You took a few deep breaths and plopped onto the bed, sitting cross-legged facing Bucky. Taking the dry cloth, you gently patted at his forehead, mopping up a small bit of sweat. You continued to do this, moving a few stray pieces of hair from his face and tucking them behind his ear, until he looked a bit better. Although you were both silent, an awful lot of eye contact was held, and that was a conversation all in its self.

"Thank you, y/n." Bucky looked serious, as if there was something he really wanted to tell you. Laughing, you popped two cold & flu tablets out of a packet and placed them on the nightstand. "Jeez, don't get all soft on me now. You're not dying, Buck, I just want to make sure you're alright!" You grabbed the thermometer and held it up to his mouth. "This won't taste good, but once this is over I will definitely make you some soup. Open wide..."

Bucky smiled, shaking his head. "I have arms, y/n, I can do this mys-" you shut him up by shoving the thermometer into his mouth, laughing when he almost choked on it. As he re-adjusted the thermometer, you placed a hand on his forehead. He relaxed under your touch, closing his eyes; he was definitely burning up, his forehead was far warmer than your hands.

You took the thermometer from his mouth and brought your hand back from his head. Bucky opened his eyes, and you gave him a sigh. "Yep, you've definitely got a fever. You need to rest, I'll come and check on you soon...maybe put on a movie? Anything to distract you, really. Okay?" Bucky nodded, sitting up a bit more. You leant in and gave him a hug, and placed a kiss on his cheek. You pulled away slightly, your foreheads inches away. You leaned into his touch, his hands holding your arms, but stood up when you realised what was happening.

"I...I'll see you soon, Buck." And with that, you were gone.

(2) The clock read 6:14. The smell of marinara sauce and french cheese wandered around the avengers tower, making you grow more and more hungry by the second.

One minute. One minute, and you'd be able to stuff your face with Wanda's signature pasta. One more minute and you'd be in pasta heaven. One more minute.

You began to grow impatient, the ticking of your clock driving you insane. You paced in your room, mouth watering at the thought of the delicious dinner waiting for you. 30 seconds.

Your stomach growled like a tiger hunting it's prey. You opened your door, an even stronger whiff of Wanda's creation hitting you like a sucker punch. You turned back around to look at the clock - 5 more seconds.

It's almost time.

4 more seconds.

You couldn't wait.

3.

A month's worth of pleasure waiting for you on one plate.

2.

Anticipation bubbled inside of you.

1.

This is it.

The clock turned to 6:15, and you heard Wanada call from the floor below.

"DINNERS READY!"

Racing out of your room, you ran at the speed of light. You knew what was waiting for you, and you weren't going to waste any time getting to it.

Jogging down the stairs, you saw everybody around the kitchen, talking and laughing; you got to the 5th step from the bottom before you ankle buckled underneath you. With a yelp, you twisted and fell, trying to grab the banister for support but failing. However, you didn't fall on the floor, but fell into a pair of arms. Looking up, you saw Bucky grinning.

"You're telling me you can kill 8 Hydra agents with one bullet while fighting off three more at the same time, but when it comes to stairs you forget how to walk?" Tilting your head back in laughter, Bucky tightened his grip, holding you bridal style. Almost falling out of his arms, you threw your hands behind his neck, causing you both to laugh even more. You heard Wanda and Nat laughing with you from the kitchen, but you were only focused on Bucky. After you stopped laughing, you smiled widely, looking back at him.

"The sad part is, you know exactly why I was running down the stairs." He smiled back, eyes glistening. "Mhm," he nodded, rolling his eyes, "you are so desperate to see me that you couldn't help but run!"

Giving him a fake slap on the arm, you chuckled.

"I know, I know. You really want the pasta, don't you?" Nodding, Bucky shook his head. You felt relaxed in his arms, comfortable and secure. He could've put you down a few minutes ago, but you didn't mind. You looked into his eyes and he did the same thing, breath hitching in your throat. Only just realising that your face was particularly close to Bucky's, you felt his gentle breath on your cheek. You closed your eyes as he leaned in closer to you, his hair tickling the side of your face.

"What's up with the lovebirds!?" Tony exclaimed (loudly), walking into the kitchen. Both you and Bucky bolted upright, and you fell out of his arms. Hitting the floor with a smack, you landed face-up.

"Son of a BITCH, that hurt!" You yelled, Bucky rushing to help you up. You all laughed, but something inside you felt disappointed, almost unfulfilled.

(3) after dinner that night, you avoided Bucky for roughly a week. You felt embarrassed, awkward, so you kept your distance. You went down to the training room one day and checked the chart: Wednesday - Sam and Bucky's turn to use the sparring mat. You didn't mind being in the same room, as he'd be focused on training, so you were just going to use one of the machines. When you walked in, you found Bucky on the treadmill - Sam wasn't there. Luckily, Bucky hadn't noticed you yet, so you turned around and slowly walk away. Before you were fully out of the door, you heard Bucky call your name.

"Y/n!" Sighing, you turned back around and gave Bucky a tight smile. "I thought today was your turn to train with Sam?" You asked, placing the water bottle and small towel that you were carrying on one of the benches and crossing your arms, becoming conscious that you were only wearing shorts and a sports bra; it was summer, after all.

He smiled and wiped his forehead with his own towel, stepping off the machine. "Yeah, Sam didn't feel so good and had to cancel. Thought I'd come here on my own, but you're here now, right? D'you want to spar?" Your mind raced, you knew there was no getting out of this one.

"Sure thing. I train with Nat anyway and I definitely need a break from her Russian spy tricks." He laughed as you both stepped onto the training mat. "Is now a bad time to remind you that I'm trained in Russian spy tricks?" You smiled, genuinely relaxed. "Maybe not."

Not a second had gone by and you had already started sparring. You kicked him on his side, he punched you in the throat, you pushed him onto the floor, he took you with him with a swift move of his leg. You both jumped up and started all over again, even more vigorous. You went to punch him on the side of his face, but he grabbed your wrist before it met his cheek. "Try again."

With your free arm, you elbowed him above the shoulder and punched him in the nose. In retaliation, you recieved a blow to the stomach, but you were quick to push him up against the wall and lock him there with your arm against his throat. You leaned in close and whispered in his ear.

"I've been wanting to kick your ass all week."

He quickly flipped you over, and you pressed your back against the wall. He pinned your arms up above your head with one hand and held your waist with the other. You tried to kick him away, but his legs were pressed flatly against yours. He leaned in even closer.

"Yeah? Hit me with your best shot."

His words were a mix between whisper and a grunt, which sent a shiver down your spine. However, you knew his weakness. You pressed your forehead against his, and his grip weakened slightly. Just before your lips were about to touch his, you raised your leg and hit him in the crotch with your knee. He stumbled backwards, giving you the perfect opportunity to strike him in the chest. He went toppling to the side, falling heavily onto the floor. Calmly, you walked over and looked down at him.

"Is that the best you can do?"

(4) summer came and went in a flash, and before you knew it, the trees had lost their leaves and everything was a warm shade of red and orange. It was a late autumn evening and you had been reading in bed. It was far to cold for pyjamas, so you wore joggers and one of Bucky's knitted jumpers that you had stolen a few months ago, it smelled exactly like him. Turning your bedside light off, you glanced at your clock, which read 10:53. Laying down, you soon fell into sleepy doze, the sound of rain patterning against your window aiding your sleep.

You must have been asleep for almost an hour before you were woken up. Light streamed into your room from the open door in front of you, and you saw the silhouette of somebody crouched down by the side of your bed.

"Hmm?" You sat up and rubbed your eyes, adjusting to the light. The person sat next to you on your bed and you immediately knew who it was.

Bucky.

He looked a bit guilty for waking you up, but his eyes looked sorrowful and ridden with regret.

"Nightmares again?" You tiredly asked, placing a hand on Bucky's shoulder. He nodded, avoiding your gaze; his hair was pinned back into a bun, and his hands shook slightly. Usually, when Bucky had nightmares, he'd get into your bed and cuddle you, falling asleep with you by his side. However, you wanted to do something to distract him from his memories, and not just cuddle him. He stood up, about to walk to the other side of your bed before you stopped him. Rolling out from underneath the covers, you walked over to your record player and set up a vinyl. It was a record that Buck had gotten you for your birthday, 'The Best Of The 60s'. Quietly, Elvis began singing one of his ballads as you walked over to Bucky.

Placing your arms behind his neck, you gently swayed to the beat of the music. He cautiously wrapped his arms around your waist and bent down slightly, allowing you to rest your face in his neck. You couldn't be any closer; your torsos were pressed firmly against each other, arms tightly gripping to the other person. As you both rocked back forth, Bucky raised one of his arms up and placed a hand behind your head, holding you closer. You had never felt safer in your life, and you began to think about the man holding you.

When you first met, you could honestly say that you were scared of him. You weren't intimidated by him, but you were terrified that he would snap at you or hate you as soon as you met. You could've never guessed that you'd have the sort of connection that you do, but it worked out brilliantly. After growing more mature with each other, you found it easier to empathise with him. Everything that he had been through - torture, near death experiences, kidnapping, forced murder - you felt the same pain as he did.

Tightening your grip around him, you let out a few tears. You were comfortable crying around him, he never made you feel uncomfortable, yet you really didn't want to break down in this situation. But guess what? You broke down anyway.

The few drops on your cheeks became a river of tears as you thought more about Bucky. Your shoulders heaved, and Bucky noticed instantly. He knew why you were crying, he felt the same pain. He stroked your hair, warm fingertips against your scalp. He lifted your jumper up ,slightly, with his other hand and rubbed circles on the small of your back. Your skin tingled under his burning touch.

Bucky's eyes stung with tears; there was a lingering thought between you both that hung in the air, and he hated seeing you in pain. You pulled back from him, moving your arms to his shoulders. The music stopped a while ago, but you still moved to a shared rhythm. You looked down, but Bucky used his real hand to lift your chin up. His hand was large and warm, radiating heat. He cupped your cheek, and with his thumb, brushed away a few of our tears. You tilted your head into his hand, closing your eyes. In that moment, Bucky would've kissed you. He wanted to lean down and brush your lips with his, run a hand through your hair as he kissed you. Yet he saw the sleepiness in your face, and knew it wouldn't be right.

Putting both arms around your waist, he effortlessly lifted you up, and you wrapped your legs around his hips. He walked you back over to your bed and placed you underneath the soft covers, planting a kiss on your forehead. With a small smile and a 'goodnight', you were back on your own.

(5) three months later, it was almost Christmas, and the avengers had gone all out. The group always did something ridiculously extra over the holidays, and this year Tony had rented out an ice skating rink. It was only a few blocks away from the Avengers tower, so you all took one of Tony's limos down there. You wore a red turtleneck jumper, a plaid skirt and black tights, as the group arranged that the dress code was red. Bucky wore a dark red shirt + hoodie with jeans, and everybody else wore an odd combination of christmas jumpers, cardigans, tee shirts, and (in Steve's case) a red Hawaiian shirt.

In the limo was you, Bucky, Tony, Steve, Natasha, Wanda, Sam, Bruce, Vision and Clint. Everybody was invited, but many had gone home to see their family for the holidays. You all made a pretty nice group, though.

The skating rink was huge, enough to fit hundreds of people. As you all sat outside of the rink putting on your ice skates, Tony asked a very important question.

"How many of you guys can actually skate?"

Out of all 10 of you, only three could say that you've skated before.

"I can." You stated, tying up your laces.

"Same here." Replied Wanda.

"Me too." Said Sam. Everyone looked at him, amused yet puzzled.

"What!? My mom made me go with her when I was a kid, alright?" Everyone laughed, and Sam looked slightly pissed.

Once you were ready, you carefully stood up and took Bucky's arm.

"D'you want to skate with me?" You asked, entering the rink. You flawlessly made your way around the edge, Bucky slipped quite a few times. "How did you get so good at this?" He questioned, clinging onto the barrier for dear life.

"I used to go all the time with my friends, there was a cute little skating rink next to our school." You span around on the ice, landing perfectly on your feet. Bucky tried to leave the wall but fell directly onto his bottom, making you laugh harder than you ever have.

The night went on peacefully as you skated with your friends. Nat and Wanda stayed together the entire time, hand in hand, and every time you looked over at Steve he was on the floor. You and Bucky spent your time skating around the rink together, talking about anything and everything, laughing whenever you saw Steve fall over. You all decided to leave at 9pm, and 9pm seemed to be coming closer by the second. You and Bucky were the last ones left on the rink, everybody else had gone to the limo. Steve sat on the bench outside of the barrier, putting his shoes back on.

"Should we wait for you guys?" He asked, putting his skates back on the shelf.

You glanced at Bucky who had just fallen over and giggled. "Nah, we'll get a taxi."

Steve left, and Bucky got back up. "Come over here." You beckoned him to the centre of the rink where you were stood. He laughed, shaking his head. "And sign my death certificate? No thank you."

"C'mon Buck, you haven't left the barrier all night!" You skated over to him and took his hand. "I'll help you?" He sight and gave you his other hand, and you both slowly skated over to the centre of the rink. "See how easy this is?" You asked as you let go of his hands and span around on the spot. Moments after you let go of his hands, he fell backwards. You didn't realise until too late, and fell over his leg, resulting in you on top of him. You couldn't of landed worse; your legs were straddling his hips, your chests pressed up against each other, your hands on the ice either side of Bucky's head.

Laughing nervously, you gave him an awkward smile and apologised. He sat up, you now sat, facing him, oh his lap. You both thought the exact same thing - now was the perfect time to kiss. Both of you slowly leaned in, and your lips barely brushed before the lights went out. You laughed hysterically, plunged into darkness.

"Shit," Bucky exclaimed, holding onto your hand, "how are we going to get out?"

(6) not a week had gone by before the new year came around, and Pepper had planned a new years eve party. Despite it only being the same eleven of you that spent Christmas together, Pepper told you all she wanted everybody to wear suits and party dresses, so you could have a fancy new years party. It was 8:25pm when you went to the common area. Everything was different; furniture had been moved, there was a soft orange glow from the ambience lights that lit up the room, and the large windows showed the rest of the city below ((the common area looks how it did in the party scene in age of ultron)). You were the last to arrive, and you heard music playing from the common area as you walked down the stairs.

Tony had hired chefs and bartenders, and set up a photo booth in the corner of the room. Fairy lights were strung around the large room, and you heard the sound of Steve, Bucky and Sam laughing together. You wore a floor length, red glittery dress that had a cut on the side, running from the floor to the side of your thigh. Your hair was curled and gently flowed down your shoulders, almost meeting the sweetheart neckline on your dress. Your outfit was complete with a pair of red heels, and you could admit that you looked stunning.

Once you got to the bottom of the stairs, you immediately walked over to Natasha and Wanda who were at the bar. Nat wore a knee length black bodycon dress with spaghetti straps and stilettos, whereas wanda wore a dark purple tiered dress with black wedges. As soon as they saw you, both of their jaws dropped. You blushed, your cheeks matching the red lipstick you wore. "I'm overdressed, aren't I?" You asked, feeling slightly self conscious.

"No way! You look amazing!" Wanda reassured, looking you up and down.

"Wanda's not the only one thinking it." Natasha said as she pointed a finger past your shoulder. You looked behind you and saw Sam, Steve and Bucky staring at you. Steve and Sam merely gaped at your appearance, whereas Bucky grinned at you. Turning back around, you laughed with Nat and Wanda and grabbed a bottle of water from the bartender. Once you got your drink, you walked over to Bucky who was now sat alone on one of the sofas.

"Good evening, James." You spoke in a fake posh accent which made both of you laugh, and you sat down next to him. He wore an all black suit, his hair styled nicely, falling past his jaw. You began talking, but the chit chat didn't last long before Tony arrived from the kitchen.

"Tables set guys, let's eat!"

You sat next to Natasha at the rectangular dinner table, Bucky sitting across from you. Everyone ate steak and salad, and you each went around the table saying what your new years resolution would be. When it got to your turn, you were stumped.

"I don't know...I can't really think of anything." You stated, taking a sip of your glass of white wine.

"Even though we've known you for a year and a half, there's still so much that you haven't told us about yourself." Clint opined. There was a mutual agreement between the rest of the group, but Bucky stayed silent.

"Maybe your new years resolution could be to learn a language?" Sam added, taking a bite of his dinner. Bucky snickered as you turned to face Sam.

"Non penso sia davvero necessario." (I don't think that's really necessary) Everybody looked taken aback at your bilingual secrecy, except Bucky. Instead, he just smiled at you.

After dinner, everybody went back to the common area and danced. After Tony and Steve got defensive about who could dance better, they decided to host a mini dance competition. Bucky looked around, but you were nowhere to be seen. Before anybody could notice he was leaving, he snuck out of the room and down the corridor. It took him a few minutes before he saw you out on the balcony, staring up into the night sky.

"What's up?" He asked as he stepped out into the cold breeze, placing an arm around your shoulder. You tilted your head to rest on his arm, and sighed, your breath forming a little cloud of steam. "I'm just thinking about that delicious chocolate ice cream." Bucky laughed, thinking back to the ice cream everybody had for dessert. "I don't blame you, it was very nice." He spoke, voice calm and sweet.

"Hmm" you sight contently. Bucky felt the goosebumps on your arms and pulled away.

"Here." He said, taking off his blazer and handing it to you.

"Thank you, Buck." You replied, wrapping it around your cold arms.

"Wait..." He paused, looking at your face. "Mhm, you've got a bit of chocolate ice cream in the corner of your mouth!" He laughed as you wiped around the side of you lip.

"Gone?" You asked, examining your clean finger. "Nope, try again." You breathed out, swatting at your mouth again, but your finger always came back clean. "Can you get it off for me?" You asked him, and he smirked.

"Sure thing, y/n."

He leaned in close to you and crashed his lips onto yours. His lips were dry and he kissed roughly, making your soft lips turn to jelly under his. Your hands found his neck, and his your waist as you ran a few fingers through his hair. He pulled you closer, deepening your kiss, as you sighed into his mouth. You weren't quick to pull away, making sure you savour the feeling of his lips against yours. You smiled at him as he looked at you, pure admiration in his eyes.

"You don't know how fucking long I've been waiting to do that."

#avengers #avengers x fem!reader #avengers x y/n #avengers x you #marvel #marvel fanfic #marvel fanfiction #the avengers #marvel fic #avengers x platonic reader #bucky fic #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes x reader #bucky imagine #bucky x you #bucky x reader #bucky barnes #james buchanan barnes #james buchanan bucky barnes #james barnes #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes fandom #bucky barns x reader #bucky barns imagine #bucky barnes x fem!reader #bucky barnes x y/n #5 + 1 #5 + 1 bucky barnes

[jjmaybanksblog]

Lost Sweater- Kiara Carrera

Kiara x female reader

Summary: Alternative Universe where when one person loses something, their soulmate receives it. 

Word count: 2,028

Warnings: None

B/N: Brother/ boy name

Y/N: Your name

Y/A: Your age

Soulmate. A simple word that brings many thoughts to the brain. Someone who you're supposed to spend the rest of your life with, happily. Someone who will treat you in ways you could only dream of. Many people believe in them, others don't. You grew up a non-believer never understanding why God would make something so amazing, such a difficult task for people. Your friends all around you had begun receiving their lost items, all of them meeting their soulmates, meanwhile you remained confused and alone.

You were a non-believer until one day your missing sweater wound up on your bed with a note attached to it.

"You must have misplaced this, I was confused when I was sleeping and the cotton fell on my face, fun fact I almost suffocated. Anyways, hi. This must belong to my soulmate, damn that's crazy. In my entire life I never believed in this shit, my parents telling me about how they met because my dad found and returned a necklace that meant a lot to my mom. I always thought it was bullshit until recently. Here's your sweater back, I 'lost it' throwing it out my window. I hope to hear from you soon.

Your soulmate"

You read the letter over and over as the thoughts finally sunk in. Maybe you wouldn't be alone after all. Gently biting your bottom lip, you suddenly felt a rush of adrenaline run through your body. You ran out of the room and into your brother's room.

He was sitting down at his desk when you barged in. He turned around towards you, only to be nearly tackled in a hug. "Who are you and what have you done with my sister. You barely hug me." B/N asked as he saw the letter in your hand. "Ohhh shit. You got your soulmate." He mumbled, putting the pieces together.

"I'm not gonna end up alone!" You smiled. Your brother knew of your fear. You had talked to him before, explaining your thought process about this all. You were afraid you would die alone, not knowing what it would be like to love and be loved. You knew it was irrational, but growing up you never pictured someone falling in love with you. You took it to heart so you just shut every romantic aspect out of your life.

Your brother congratulated you before you ran back into your room, writing on a lined piece of paper.

"Dear soulmate,

Wow. Just writing those two words felt foreign. Sorry about my sweater almost killing you, I'm just a clumsy person that loses things a lot, but I'm glad you're okay. I also was a non-believer. I always saw the people around me finding their soulmates and being happy, meanwhile I was in the corner watching all my friends find the one. For the longest time I was convinced that maybe I just wasn't meant to have one, but knowing you're out there makes me feel... safe. Attached to this note is a picture of me, I figured maybe if you're curious enough you would want to know what I look like. My name is Y/N I'm Y/A years old and I can't wait to find out who my soulmate is. Xx

Y/N

You took an image of yourself and stapled it to the back of the letter. Opening your window that led to her backyard, you grabbed a scrunchie and wrapped it around the note. You carelessly threw the note and picture out of the window and watched it effortlessly fly away in the night sky. You fell onto your bed, staring happily at your bedroom ceiling. 

Slowly drifting off to sleep, your eyes snapped open when you heard a soft popping sound echoed by your desk. Rubbing your eyes, you stood up and walked over. Another letter was displayed on the wood, you smiled softly as you sat down. Your eyes scanned the letter as you read it out loud.

Y/N,

Wow. Just wow. I can't even think of words to form right now. You're absolutely breathtaking. I'm not gonna lie I wasn't expecting a girl, but God, do I feel blessed knowing that you're my soulmate. Your letter and picture were actually soaking wet. But it smelled like salt water, so I'm guessing you live possibly on a coast. I live in the Outer Banks in North Carolina. When I got your letters it just smelled like home. I wanna go traveling, to you, out of the country, just explore new things. I totally understand how you felt about feeling like you're not gonna find a soulmate. I've watched more than half of my high school senior class find their soulmates during the year. Meanwhile I was acting like everything was completely fine and I wasn't distraught. I should be asleep right now, but I'm dying to talk to you. Get to know you. Later on if you'd like, I would love to call you. To hear your voice and your laugh. I think you should get some rest as well. I have no clue what time it is where you are but I want my love to be well rested. Goodnight Xx

Kiara Carrera

You flipped the paper around to see a beautiful mixed girl with carmel colored skin. Her hair was curly and beautiful, flowing from wind. Your eyes were drawn to her smile, you could tell she was laughing and you wished to be able to hear her laugh.

For days on end you and Kiara had been 'losing things' with letters attached to them. Tonight was the night where Kiara was going to call you. Both of you were on the edge of their seats, your hearts beating rapidly. Kiara's hands shook as she dialed your number, pausing between each number.

After what felt like forever, the phone began to ring. You audibly gasped at the sound of a bell ringing. You hesitantly picked up your cell phone that was placed on the bedside dresser. "H-hello?" You spoke into the phone. Kiara broke out in a grin, "Y/F/N, Y/L/N." Your name rolled off her tongue, goosebumps rising on your arms and back of your neck.

"Kiara Carrera" you spoke back, Kiara internally squeaking at the soft, velvety voice that spoke her name. "My god your voice.. okay I totally don't mean to sound weird but it's just so calming and relaxing. God okay wow hi, I never thought I'd see the day where I'd be on the phone with my soulmate." Kiara spoke as she nervously chewed her bottom lip.

"Honestly, me too. Growing up I always... ugh I don't mean to sound like I was sympathy or attention, I always grew up insecure and pictured myself as someone who could never be loved. And everyday I always saw or heard about people finding their soulmates in different ways. It went on for years and everyday I lost hope, but now I'm here talking to you and I feel nauseous, but in a good nervous way. Does that make sense?" You asked, rapidly shaking your leg.

"No I totally get it, I feel really hot right now mostly because I don't know what to say to you. Like my whole life I've planned on things to say but now that I'm talking to you I have no clue what to say or how to say it." 

Kiara threw herself on her bed, her smile never leaving her face as she closed her eyes, listening to your soothing voice. "So, tell me about Kiara, what it's like to live in the Outer Banks?" 

4 months later

After months of planning, you had managed to save up enough money for a plane ticket to OBX. You were currently walking off the plane and into the terminal, your heart beating a mile a minute. You stood to the side as you were about to text Kiara, asking where she was. 

That was until you locked eyes with the girl you'd recognize from the pictures. Kiara's heart felt like it was about to leap out of her chest as your eyes met. You held your suitcase tightly as you made a run towards your girl. 

You released your items mid run as you opened your arms out. With one swift motion Kiara picked you up in her arms, holding you close to her. Your legs wrapped around her waist as you held each other tightly. "You're real." Kiara mumbled into your neck as she held back tears.

You pulled away from the hug, your legs still around her torso. Her fingers brushed their way through your hair, subconsciously leaning into her touch. Kiara pecked your cheek as she placed you down onto your feet. Your hands intertwined as you guys walked to her car, your thumb rubbing over her knuckles.

They spent the car ride debating on which Beyonce song was truly the best. Kiara blasted the music as loud as she could take as she sped down roads to her house. 

She drove past the beach, your eyes not leaving the beautiful view in front of you. Your head was turned to the window as colors of the sand and the ocean blurred by. "You want to go?" Kie asked you as she saw you admiring the waves.

You were left speechless, only able to nod your head. 

As soon as they got to Kiara's house, her family was waiting at the door to be introduced. You felt an overwhelming amount of support from her family, none of them giving you attitude or being rude. No one was being homophobic, they were so welcoming towards you which made this day even better.

"Let's go get changed. Bathrooms down the hall and to the left." You dragged your suitcase behind you as you entered the bathroom. You quickly changed into a teal bikini, both pieces of fabric covering you properly, throwing on an oversized shirt for comfort. Kiara grabbed 2 towels and waited for you at this point her face ache from smiling but she couldn't stop.

You walked back out, giving your girl a thumbs up. Joining Kie in the car, she set off to the beach which was only 5 minutes away. It was currently 7:42 p.m. and the sun was beginning to set. The sky was painted in a mixture of purples and pinks, splashes of orange thrown into it as well. You laid down the two towels and sat down on one of them, patting the space next to you.

Kie sat down, instinctively wrapping her arm around you. You rested your head on her shoulder, sitting there in a comfortable silence. You were still in awe at the sight, the waves rising and then quickly falling onto the sand. This was everything compared to the beaches in New Jersey. The birds that flew above, diving down at any food they could find. The sounds of the waves crashing relaxed you to another level. 

"I can't believe you get to see this everyday." You whispered. "You could get to see it everyday too. Well, one day. Well only if you want of course." Kiara nervously stumbled on her words, not knowing how to recover from that. "I'd love that." You simply said, looking at her. The sunlight reflected perfectly off her skin, giving her a sort of Golden look. 

"Kiara?" You questioned, your eyes falling to her lips. "Hmm?" "Can I kiss you?" Kiara was taken back at your question, but immediately answered by moving in toward her. She leaned forward, her lips brushing against yours. You made the final move and pushed slightly so you two were finally kissing. Both of you melted into each other's touch as you smiled into the kiss. You two shared a passionate kiss for a few seconds before pulling away, your noses gently touching. You pressed a kiss to her nose as she shyly bit her bottom lip. 

You rested your head back on her shoulder, staring back into the sunset. "I'm really glad I lost that sweater." You admitted.

"I am too."

#rafe cameron #outer banks #madelyn cline #jj x reader #kiara x reader #obx kiara #kiara carrera #kiara outer banks #kiara icons #madison bailey #jj maybank x you #jj maybank x y/n #jj maybank x reader #jj maybank fanfiction #jj maybank imagine #jj outer banks #obx jj #rafe cameron x y/n #rafe cameron x you #rafe obx #rafe outer banks #john b #john b imagine #john b routledge #john b obx #john booker routledge #kiara carerra x reader #madison bailey x reader #soulmate

[judgement-free-sideblog]

Ghosts from the rainforest

Captain James Conrad x Reader

Summary: A simple rescue mission will bring him back to a place full of nightmares, and maybe this time he could find redemption. Situated in 1975, 2 years after the events of Skull Island.

Warnings: Violence, blood, wounds, mentions of war, cursing, implied smut, smoking, angst.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

I finally manage to write the end to this tiny fic, I hope you like it, and I'm going to start on my ideas for a Jonathan Pine adventure, but I haven't decide yet.

Chapter 7: Fever [Final]

The helicopter was already on motion, and the rescue crew that Brooks had sent for you were charging everything for the trip. The guys were excited to finally going back home, the Celebes Sea was ahead of you in the military base you were staying, and waiting in the Pacific the majestic USS Constellation  (CV-64) waiting to take all of you home.

Home? A country that had make more damage and taken everything from you, your family, and had force you to live away to mend some of the atrocities they had committed in the name of freedom.

"Not looking so charming today are we?" You said to him once he walked in your room to pick up your bags, you have finally stop the hostilities after he had offered you his shoulder to cry while you mourned Shukri on his funeral and after all the physical torture he had endured so you could safely leave Borneo.

He had been clear about letting you stay if that was what you wanted, and even when the rest of the crew asume you were coming back to USA, he knew you would have to say goodbye sooner or later, so instead of telling him all the things your heart was keeping from him you kept teasing him and pretending the chopper was not waiting for him.

"I have a minor headache love, but it's okay, are you ready to say goodbye?" He said and you noted how his temple had a few wrinkles, he was trying to smile over the pain in his head "It's a shame you don't come with us, I have a lot of things I wanted to show you" he grabbed your hand and all your alarms started to scream.

"Conrad are you okay?" Those words were all you have hoped for, however the radiant heat from his skin told you he was not exactly fine. "Dear God you are burning up" You said touching his head and looking desperately for a thermometer in your belongings.

"I like you too doctor, but why don't we wait until we get to the ship, we can share a bunk bed" He was definitely not himself.

"103° damn it Conrad!" You said, and for some oddly reason remember the night he told you about Randa and how much he complained about mosquitoes while he was dressing "Look at me, I'm not kidding, did you take Chloroquine before we leave Malaysia? I told you guys you had to..."

He nodded negative, and before he could speak he simply throw up in the nearest trash bin, making you suspect of the worst, specially since all the medicine was now gone and the only viable solution now was the aircraft carrier in the middle of the Pacific waiting for you.

"Also you have perfect legs you know that? I could spend my life sleeping on them." He kept saying things like that while you helped him to the heliport "Come here princess your prince charming needs your love" he said trying to kiss you.

"Later dear, preferably when you're not dying or smelling like vomit" you tried to stop him.

"Well you didn't mind me covered in dirt and sweat" He tried again but he stopped to scream "Reg! I love you man, you are like a son to me" and also tried to kiss the boy on the forehead.

"What happened to the Captain?" Slivko asked concerned once you help him to board the chopper while carrying his luggage and your medical bag.

"I have no idea, but I'm afraid it might be Malaria" you said bluntly and all of them looked concerned at you, while he vomited again "Do you have medical equipment here?" You asked the pilot and he only raised his thumb while you make sure he was steady on the helicopter floor, and almost didn't feel the machine take off while you tried to put an IV on his arm.

After one hour that felt like ten you could no longer see the island, only the immensity of the Pacific, and growing in the horizon the USS Constellation, even when you despised war and everything it represented the enormous carrier was enough to let you speechless, specially when a team of nurses and a doctor was already with a stretcher waiting for him.

"It's going to be ok James" you told him holding his hand while the experts rushed him inside.

"You really like men to die quite literally for you right?" He tried to joke, fighting the impulse of vomiting again, "Hey it's okay, I have to take care of you remember?" He smiled and you hold his hand trying to not get on the way of the medical staff, but he was too weak and fall asleep.

After they had stabilized his temperature, and take samples of his blood to determine the pathogen they let you in, the beds inside the medical bay of the ship were oddly spacious, and you could be sited next to him without any other person listening.

"Y/N?" He asked opening his beautiful eyes, "Hey it's okay love, I'm feeling better" He said and tried to reach for the glass of water on the table.

"Let me" You said and put it closer to him, "I know, once they identify the plasmodium they will know what is the best treatment for you, they take test and interrogate all of us, don't tell him I told you but Reles almost passed out when he saw the needle " He attempt to laugh but was still weak so he only smiled.

"Well is rewarding seen you on my dead bed, I'm quite honored, tears look oddly beautiful on you" He said and a small smile form in your lips.

"And you are still delirious" You said looking for a piece of cloth, and cold water from the sink to put on his head. "Here, try to rest, I'll come see you later" you told him but before your hand could leave his head he hold you still "What?"

"I might be dying, so you owe me at least listening me like adults" He said forcing you to stay next to him.

"You are not dying" you said trying to sound like it didn't matter and failing miserably "you are not, but fine. Let's talk" you concede.

"I'm sorry" he started contrary to what you had expected. "I had no idea how you looked before we met, and i was under no circumstances trying to seduce you to lure you back to America" you blush and regret your decision to stay by his side.

"I'm sorry too" You responded after a while "You have done so much helping me, even when half of the trouble I caused was preventable if I haven't trusted in the wrong people." You said and he hold your hand softly, he didn't want to hear about that, and you knew it so you took all the courage you have to continue. "And I'm sorry I over reacted, I am so used to people coming to me with second intentions that I just pushed you away to avoid getting hurt, and I just end up making other people hurt you"

"I'm sorry I make you come to the ship, I knew you wanted to stay" he said sincerely.

"It's okay, I have to make sure you stay alive, you know for the boys, maybe working at Monarch with you and Brooks won't be so bad"

"Well you can always run away from us in Hawaii, or maybe... we could run away together" He gave you a pleading look, and for moment you could imagine that life, keep running away, by his side, the soldier that never came home, and the idealist doctor, and keep leaving ghosts in every island, trying to find happiness apart from the world, but together. He kissed you, but this time it wasn't a lusty hunger kiss, nor passionate and angry like before, it was reassuring and you knew no matter what your answer was, he was on your side, for the first time you had someone on your side "So what do you say?"

But you couldn't answer because out of nowhere your stomach make you nauseous and you rush to the toilet to empty its content.

"Are you okay dear?" He screamed from the bed "I'm trying bloody hard to not take this as criticism"

"I'm okay, but I'm going to check your tests and start taking the pills before I end up confessing my sins on the fever like you" you said and walked out of the bathroom to saw him "We can talk later" you assure him.

You marched inside the medical office and started to look in the cabinets, when the young doctor that had received Conrad walked in.

"I'm sorry, I start feeling the symptoms and I thought it would be better if I start on the chloroquine before it gets worse" you excuse yourself.

"That would be great, if any of you had Malaria" he said offering you a seat that you take since he speak with a Texan accent and an authoritarian voice that made up from his young face "But we test all of you and what our SAS friend has is more likely a stomach flu from some bad shrimp, I was just on my way to tell him." He said and you sigh in relief, but also concerned about your own symptoms

"Oh that's great, but I start barfing too, and I didn't had the shrimp last night" you said and he took out a small file with your name that the nurses had put together earlier.

"Well it may be motion sickness, we are in a boat after all, or maybe... you told the nurse you didn't remember when was your last period?" He said looking the file.

"Well we have been in the jungle almost a month so I wasn't exactly counting" you tried to joke.

"The change of environment can trigger the vomit, or if you had sex in the past three weeks you might be pregnant" He smiled and all the weight of the world fall into your shoulders instantly. "In any case you should rest and let alone my medical cabinets, go with nurse Matthews she will give you some vitamins" he said but you were not longer listening.

No, it couldn't be that, right? You tried to convince your mind, but deep down you knew it was true, what would he think? He was a soldier, a man of the field, not a father, and you were obviously not a mother, what will happen now? Now that he wanted to run away in the world next to you, a baby had a place on that plan?.

Two days later Conrad was out of the medical bay and trying to approach you, offering you a fresh start from the afternoon you pause all those weeks ago in Malaysia.

But the stolen kisses on the hallways, and his nightly incursions on your cabin only made it harder for you to find a way to come clean about your news, even when the idea had already sink in your mind, because it was a baby, and it was his baby, how could you not be happy and grateful? Yet you haven't say anything to him.

Four days later he had spend the whole day walking on the deck with you, like if the planes and choppers were an appropriate sighting for a date.

"We'll be in Hawaii soon" He started "If you want to go out for a walk in the morning and get lost in the jungle we have to star planning now" he said and you were looking at the ocean trying to make up your mind.

"Maybe... I was wondering about the work you do at Monarch, maybe I will give it a chance" you start not sure how the whole we are having a baby situation will fit in your speech "I mean if you want to travel the world it might help to have a paying job for a while" you were nervously touching your hands.

"Of course, also when the baby comes I would like to have a proper house for him to be... or she, I don't care you know? as long as they're healthy" he said and you nodded yes.

"Yeah of course... what??" You look at him and he had the most radiant smile on his face, and he was clearly holding his laugh and apparently tears, of joy? "How do you know?

"Well nurse Matthews saw us kissing and then she complained about how Children this days keep having children out of wedlock" he said and you hide your face on your hands.

"I was really going to tell you... for real is just..." but you didn't have the words in you, and the tears were running on your face

"I know, it's fine, I mean is a little soon but if I'm honest I'm tired of running, and after all we've been trough I couldn't imagine a single person to share this experience with" He said cleaning the tears from your face.

"You sure?" You asked again, needing to hear it from his mouth.

"I'm sure, I fall in love with you when I saw you scaring local vendors in Malaysia and then fighting guerilla liders in Borneo, I even loved you when you vomit after kissing me for real, I'm completely taken by you Y/N"

"I fall in love with you too James" you said, and his expression got serious for a moment. "What?"

"Nothing, is just that I'm going to miss Prince Charming" he said giving you again the disarming smile that had started all this adventure.

The end

@damalseer

@kinghiddlestonanddixon (I hope you like the end)

#captain james conrad x reader #james conrad x reader #captain james conrad x you #james conrad imagine #captain james conrad #james conrad #kong skull island #kong skull island fanfiction #reg slivko #joe reles #glenn mills #tom hiddleston