#will come back and tag as I can’t remember the handle atm

[fizzigigsimmer]

That spring, Steve’s mom finally gets tired of getting cheated on and files for divorce. His dad is a dick about it and hires a bunch of lawyers to ensure that she basically leaves with nothing. Worse, he fights her for custody of Steve and taunts her with the fact she’ll never see him again - because why would any teenager want to give up everything, just to rough it out with their train-wreck of a mother? But jokes on him cause the judge basically leaves it up to Steve, and Steve would rather stomp on his own balls than get stuck with that asshole. Even if it means having to leave the big house and his car and starting over in a new place where nobody knows him.

Steve never met his mother’s side of the family in California. All he really knows is that the family disapproved of her marriage. There’s a story about his aunt coming to visit once on his birthday when he was like five, but she got in a fight with mom and she’s never been back. So Steve doesn’t even think about them when he tries to imagine what he and his mom are going to do on their own. He imagines her selling her car and the other gifts dad put in her name over the years to rent a decent apartment somewhere, maybe in Indianapolis or Chicago.

He’s really shocked one night when she announces that she’s been in touch with her family, and she she asks him about how he feels about moving to California to some sleepy little town called Moonwood. She tries to enthuse him about it by going on about how beautiful it is there, right at the edge of the national forest, but Steve’s more concerned with the fact that they’ll be living with people who hate them - and in the sticks too! Its two hours to the nearest mall! How’s he gonna find a job in this place? And what about school?

But Steve looks around at the hotel they’ve been staying in and the paper thin smile she fixes on her face to try and hide her broken heart from him and how fucked everything is, and he just wants her to be okay.

They move to California, and the one bright side is the relatives turn out to be not all that hateful. There’s awkward tension and a shit load of history there for sure, but from the minute they pull up to his grandparents house the door is thrown open and they’re welcomed with open arms. His grandpa seems a little stiff at first, but Steve gets the impression its because he doesn’t know what to do with himself as Steve’s mom and his grandma hug each other and cry. The weirdest part is when they start speaking in a language Steve’s never heard his mother use before.

Later his aunt tells him it’s lythan, but she just laughs when Steve asks if that means they’re from Lithuania. Apparently lythan is a very old language that started in romania and is only spoken today in two places. Here, and some village in romania that an ancestor immigrated from.

None of this is making sense to him but he’s just happy his mother seems happier and that he has help taking care of her, since she’s still pretty broken up about the divorce. She’s always been a passionate woman his mom. The kind of person who believes in soulmates and love at first sight. She’s always told him that when he meets the one for him he’ll know it in an instant and that he should hang on to that person with his whole heart. Which sounded great and all when he was a kid, but honestly just makes him sad now when he looks at how things turned out with her and his dad.

The first week after they get there, Steve cant sleep and catches his mother, his grandmother and his aunt talking in the kitchen late one night. He overhears her say that she knew it was a risk being with his dad, but that she’d have regretted it more if she didn’t follow her heart. Even if she wasn’t the one for Steve’s dad the way he was for her, she’d always be grateful because she has Steve. But she doesn’t want him to grow up feeling like he has to change who he is and like he always has to be the one giving to someone else just to be loved.

For the first time since the divorce Steve is almost mad at her - wants to shout it’s too late mom! - but the feeling passes as quickly as it comes. He’s just sad, for them both. But he hopes things will be okay here and that this can be a new start. It could be worse right? At least he gets a room to himself. Yeah it’s kinda weird that his aunt still lives at home and nobody seems to have a problem with that, or is talking about what his moms plans are like they expect that she’ll just be there forever now. But he figures they’re all just focused on making up for lost time right now.

And his grandma says that people in Moonwood stay close to home anway, and that most of them spend their whole lives there without leaving. It shocks him to learn that she’s never been further outside of town than to the edge of the national forest.

His second worry, about finding a job, gets resolved by his his grandfather - who runs a soda shop on the beach. There’s not much traffic durring the off season, but in summertime the redwoods draw a fair number of tourists. Steve’s kept very busy scooping up ice cream and making root beer floats while he flirts with the gap year girls who come through in groups, to backpack through the forest. He’s just turned eighteen and he’s never had much of a problem picking up girls so he has a few flings. He gets invited to parties on the beach and ends up doing a lot of hiking that summer in his downtime. But then fall rolls around and with fewer and fewer groups of tourists passing through Steve finds himself at loose ends.

School starts up again and he realizes that maybe it was a mistake not to put more of an effort into meeting local kids and making a few connections beforehand. Schiller High is over in the next district, and Moonwood is so far out the kids have to be bussed in. Steve’s a little nervous about starting a new school in his senior year but he tells himself it’s just one year. One year and then he has no idea what to do with himself after that, but at least he won’t be forced to attend school anymore. Still, he begs his mom to let him take their car to school the first day so that he doesn’t have to be the oldest kid on the bus. He’s pretty sure that’s a social constant even out here in the middle of nowhere.

Schiller seems pretty normal at first. It’s about the same size as his school back in Hawkins was. The school receptionist calls in some guy named Tim to show him around his first day and make sure he gets to all his classes. Tim’s alright, but Steve can see the neon nerd sign blinking above his head and plays it cool. He’s not an asshole or anything, he just doesn’t want to close any doors before getting the lay of the land. Steve just wants an easy year and he’s not gonna get that if he’s hanging out with a bully magnet - sorry Tim. Plus, Steve’s not exactly thrilled about the way Tim talks about ‘moonies’ - which is apparently what other people call people from Moonwood, instead of hicks or whatever. Steve doesn’t bother telling Tim that he’s technically a moonie now too.

His aspirations to plant himself firmly in the middle of the student social hierarchy and go unnoticed for the next ten months involve finding a group - or a pack as his grandfather weirdly put it when he assured Steve he’d find his in no time and start to feel more at home once school started. He asks Tim about the school’s athletic teams because being on a team with a bunch of other guys will basically do the work for him. There’s a swim team that Steve is definitely going to try out for. He’s not sure about basketball. He only got started back in Hawkins because his dad thought it was manlier than ‘playing’ in the pool. But he likes it okay, and Tim says the Schiller team has actually won a few regional titles.

Even though it’s his last year Steve figures it can’t hurt his college applications to be on a winning team for once. He probably won’t to start or anything but he thinks he has a good shot of seeing some playing time.

“I would stick with swimming if I were you. There’s no way you’re getting on the team.” Tim laughs. “The head coach is a moonie and he only ever picks guys from Moonwood.”

That doesn’t seem very legal, but that’s not Steve’s problem. He figures Tim is probably exaggerating anyway, just salty that the coach is giving a little extra focus to the guys from the less privileged side of the tracks.

Until Steve actually sees Billy and some of the other guys from the team.

It’s just before lunch when Steve and Tim have stopped by Steve’s locker. A blond kid in a red and white letterman jacket appears at the mouth of the hall, flanked by two other guys. It’s like something out of a movie the way the hallway clears for them and the other students gaze at them with awe filled expressions as if they’re watching a parade of olympians pass through.

“That’s Billy Hargrove. He’s captain of the basketball team.” Tim answers the unspoken question in Steve’s glance. “Don’t get on his bad side. He’s pretty much the top dog around here.”

Steve doesn’t need Tim to tell him Billy runs things around here. The guy is built like the terminator. Like someone who has ascended above mere mortals and wouldn’t be out of place among the gods. He’s built like a man, Steve finally settles on with an prickle of embarrassment hot in his chest. Steve’s a guy and he doesn’t go out of his way to look at other guys a lot, but he appreciates the things about them that are enviable.

Only envy is the furthest thing from Steve’s mind when he first sees Billy. It’s like time slows for Steve. His mouth gets dry, and he thinks to himself that Billy Hargrove is beautiful, and he wonders what that’s like. Steve knows he’s good looking. This isn’t some self depreciation bullshit, it’s just inexplicably different somehow the way he looks at Billy and thinks he finally understands what real beauty is. The way he instantly wants to get closer to him, reach out and touch. Billy has none of the unfinished awkwardness of a teenager. He’s a poster child for physical perfection that Steve is convinced walked off of a poster taped up on somebody’s wall, and has no business walking down the halls of an American high school. Seriously. How is this guy real?

He spares a quick glance for the other two guys with Billy - Dave & Chet - just long enough to confirm that he’s fucked. If these are the kinds of guys they’ve got on the team, Steve has no chance of seeing anything but a bench all year.

Billy and the other two stop at a locker not far from Steve’s on the other side of the hall, but not before Billy’s gaze does a casual sweep around the hall - very much a king surveying his kingdom. Steve fully expects that gaze to pass right over him just as unimpressed as it does everyone else, but to his surprise Billy’s gaze locks with his and sticks.

A little tingle dances up Steve’s spine and he sucks in a breath. He can’t tell what color Billy’s eyes are from this distance - at first he thinks they are something light, like a blue or grey, but then the corner of Billy’s mouth tilts up in a smirk and the light hits them a certain way and they look almost gold as he runs his tongue over some very white fangy teeth. Jesus the guy has some chompers on him.

Steve’s not afraid of a fight but it’s profoundly unsettling to have some dude literally licking his chops at him like he can’t wait to take a bite of the fresh meat. He’s pretty sure he just landed himself on Billy Hargrove’s shit list and he has no idea why. Fuck his life.

But he figures there’s nothing he can do about it but ignore it and hope that Billy decides he’s not worth the trouble. Steve turns to shut his locker, sending the message with his back that he doesn’t care about the dude giving him the crazy eyes and that Billy doesn’t intimidate him. His sweaty palms tell a different story, but that’s for Steve and only Steve to know.

As he leaves, he can feel Billy’s eyes burning into his back like lasers.

So much for going unnoticed for the year.

Now with Part 2

#harringrove #billy hargrove #steve harrington #werewolf au #teen wolf-adjacent #lol #look it’s october and I wasn’t kidding about needing more werewolf fic in my life #will come back and tag as I can’t remember the handle atm #fizzi writes fic #this is loosley inspired by angryhuangyu's lovely fanart #moonwood

[eirenical]

I am dying to know about all of your guardian wips 👀👀👀

[In response to this post.]

(And anyone else who would like to ask about a WiP, please do! ^_^)

I AM SO GLAD SOMEONE ASKED ME ABOUT THESE.  ^__________^

OK, getting these out of the way first, because they are no longer WiPs...

cheng jie KNOWS: This is the fic that became This is Not a Shovel Talk.  ^_^  This is the fic set right after Zhao Yunlan loses his sight and Shen Wei brings him to Dr. Cheng.  Set in a much broader universe (the universe tag is “college shen wei fic”) where Dr. Cheng and Shen Wei were good friends in college, and she had taken bb!Shen Wei, fresh-faced from Dixing (and millenia underground OTZ) under her wing and he imprinted on her like a baby duckling.  ^_^

FEET: I’m sure anyone who’s been following me for a hot second recognizes what this must be.  ;D  It’s the fic that became The Inherent Intimacy of Walking Barefoot Around Someone Else's Home... which is NOT a foot fetish fic, no matter how much Zhao Yunlan thought it might be.  XD  It’s about the INTIMACY.  The YEARNING.  FINDING HOME IN EACH OTHER.  It’s about the DOMESTICITY OF IT ALL, OK?  ...also a ridiculously hot picture of a barefoot Zhu Yilong looking like an absolute thirst trap, BUT WHO’S COUNTING.  XD  (...you’re welcome.  ^_^)  All fic notes and posts can be found under the tag “the foot fic,” because I’m just original that way.  ;D

And now on to the actual WiPs! ^_^

...but behind a cut because this is getting long.

buried and stabbed bookjoyworm: OK, so this one actually... may be self-explanatory.  XD  I reblogged this writing meme yesterday, and bookjoyworm was RIGHT THERE with this suggestion: “trapped under something and stabbed/impaled for weilan.”  (I’m still taking prompts for this writing meme, BTW, if anyone is interested.  ^_^)  And my mind IMMEDIATELY latched on to the idea of some kind of a car accident or cave in where Shen Wei got everyone else out, but was then crushed under the debris/trapped in the crushed car himself.  And he’s half out of it because a piece of debris is literally pierced through his body and he’s slowly suffocating, and he’s the other half out of it because he’s flashing back to the millenia he spent trapped and buried alive and his brain just kind of shut down in panic.  Of course, they’re eventually going to get him out and he’s going to be fine, but HE IS NOT HAVING A GOOD TIME, IN THE MEANTIME.  And I know this is weilan, but I’m on a Shen Wei and Da Qing kick atm, so there is also going to be a little bit of “even as rotund as he is, Da Qing can squeeze through the debris and reach Shen Wei and helps act as a lifeline when Zhao Yunlan has to stop talking because he’s going hoarse.”  ^_^

Shen Wei college fic 01: ...exactly what it says on the box?  ;D  This is the first snippet of what will eventually become the larger universe from “This is Not a Shovel Talk.”  Takes place the first day of orientation with Cheng Xingyan taking a bb!faced Shen Wei under her wing. First bit is actually posted here, if you’d like to read it.  ^_^  Labeled “01″ because I see this being a series of shorter fic, much like the “Care and Training of a Former Megalomaniac” series.  ^_^

Mirror Mirror (x this short film that Z1L did with Li Bingbing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=48K8Q7JyrNU): Oh, I am EXCITED ABOUT THIS ONE.  I am... currently in the process of taking a lot of it apart and rewriting it, but I’m still very excited.  ^_^  First of all, I recommend watching the YouTube link.  It’s a short film (~6 minutes); it’s set in the year 2084 on the Moon.  But here is the gist of it: a woman (LBB) has come to see an art installation of multiple mirrors.  The exhibit is about to close, but the curator (Z1L) keeps it open for her, conversing with her as she looks at the mirrors, but eventually becoming too overcome with emotion to continue talking.  She eventually follows the exhibit around to the stairs that lead up to the office and confronts the curator.  It turns out they have a history.  By the end, you get the definite feeling that there is a reconciliation (...and maybe more?) in their future.

So of course, I IMMEDIATELY went... omg... what a GREAT concept for a Guardian reincarnation story.  *_*  So, the basic premise is that drama canon pretty much went as drama canon goes.  Some 30-40 years later, Shen Wei and Zhao Yunlan are reincarnated.  Shen Wei doesn’t remember anything at first, but he’s haunted by his image in the mirror, convinced that the boy he sees in his reflection isn’t him, but is instead someone else.  (Spoiler: Because it is.  Two guess as to who and the first one doesn’t count. ;D)

He has... a rough go of it.  He starts pursuing art as a way to try to purge the half-memories and images that haunt him, eventually fleeing for the isolation of this installation on the moon, because he can’t handle the oppressive concern of everyone around him for his sanity.

Zhao Yunlan, OTOH, was orphaned as a child, but found and adopted very quickly by Da Qing and Zhang Shi.  I don’t think he remembers his former life, at all, but most of the major players are there; it’s only been 30-40 years and even the humans could still be alive by then.  He’s been following Shen Wei’s art for a while, fascinated by the young brilliant recluse, some nagging sensation of familiarity telling him that this person is special, and more importantly, special to HIM.  He eventually saves up the money to go to the Moon and see the mirror installation.  (By this point, Shen Wei has his memory back and he is absolutely floored that Zhao Yunlan just... waltzed into his exhibit like that, and he doesn’t even know how to begin to process it.)  The rest of the fic follows the short film canon, only this time it’s Zhao Yunlan seeing Shen Wei and just... KNOWING.  And then they live happily ever after.  ^_^

#guardian #college shen wei fic #the foot fic #eirenical writes things #shen wei #zhao yunlan #shen wei x zhao yunlan #weilan #da qing #cheng xingyan #eirenical.fic #thank you for giving me an opportunity to talk about these! #especially that last one! #^_^ #bookjoyworm #conversations through replies #wip meme

[found--family]

You and your stupid posts about Jared, just because you disagree with his opinion on the finale, is one of the reasons SPN family became a toxic shithole. Thanks for that.

good evening smad nonny 👋

y'know you're right about the SPN fandom. it can get unbearable here at times, but it comes and goes, and if you need to step away, or use that block button with no abandon, DO IT. (i don't think disgruntled anon messages will solve anything btw, but if it helps you vent then you do you, and recipients can either ignore or vent themselves). 

also: i don't hate Jared, let me just be clear on that. but as I and others have already said: you can care about someone, want good things for them, and yet disagree with them/not condone their behaviour - meaning his choice of being a part of Walker, as well as his comments in interviews about what Dean "deserved" for his ending (still being under contract with The CW is understandable in that he's not going to say anything negative about SPN's finale, but as others have pointed out now and in the past, he seems to have a far more detached view of the show and the characters than Jensen does, he's not as clued-in to what makes the story truly fulfilling). 

these are salty times my not-friend, and I consider my (very few) posts regarding J*red (not 'Jared'; please note the difference of tags as I use both) and Walker to be among the milder ones. 

it's a convergence of things, by the way: Jared's comments/beliefs/behaviour aside, Walker's content and associations during these tumultuous times is bound to cause a stir, as it should (and that's not even touching on all the drama with the SPN finale being botched in order to try and hype the lead in The CW's new show, OR the discourse surrounding Jared's acting skills on Walker - personally I find it difficult to watch him portray anyone other than Sam because Sam is peak acting for Jared imho; he's never done better, even though there are some laughably ott or head-scratching moments throughout the series, but the same can be said of many actors, and it's not a bad thing, it's just a thing). 

but focusing back on Jared: the spotlight is on him alone for Walker (Jensen isn't there to split the attention, he's off doing his own thing too) which, for a tv series, is new for him. he's playing the main character so most show-related news - especially in the first season - is going to be about him/relate to him, so we're getting to hear more about where he's at on a lot of important issues, and he's going to realise that his stances on social media and his opinions (or those perhaps "encouraged" by The CW) in interviews will be focused on like never before. 

we're not even out of January and things aren't looking good on any front for Walker, but staying silent rather than voicing our thoughts and feelings - as fans, not as random online trolls - about this show and about Jared's harmful words (please remember Always Keep Fighting is very close to his heart and yet he applauded Dean's ending where death was meant to equal "peace") isn't the way to go. 

some matters we need to laugh about, some need serious discussion, and that's just the way it is. if you can't handle interacting with the majority of fandom blogs atm then don't interact with them. keep to your corner. 

i think I'm done for now. i feel better, so thanks. 🙃 

#Walker #j*red #somewhat salty #thoughts #q and a

[chilling-in-the-dark]

The Batboys Growing Up as Yanderes Part 6/Final: Terry McGinnis

This is a yandere story; it mentions elements of obsession, possessiveness, death, murder, and kidnapping. If any of this is triggering for you, I understand, and you don’t have to read it.

I Can’t believe I finished this, like we’re on the last part of the official series I can’t believe it. That’s not to say there isn’t more coming because I’ve got loads of Ideas. :)

As always, feedback is welcomed.

Terry always knew something was wrong with him. It started when he was small, violently refusing to share his toys, attacking the man who shoulder checked his mother, refusing to acknowledge Matt for a solid week after he was born. Then becoming fiercely protective of him afterward, willing to kill for him, and the rest of the family if it came to it.

Terry met you on his first day back at school after juvie. All of the other kids avoided him, but not you, no, you smiled at him, and suddenly all of the things he’d felt previously twisted up into something darker. Terry wanted to strangle anyone who so much as smiled in your direction. He knew none of this was right, that no sane person thought like he did. Terry pushed it down so deep into himself that even he could almost forget about it, but that feeling was always there like a rash in the back of his mind.

Terry didn’t kill your first boyfriend, no matter how badly he wanted to, but he did leave the boy in a coma when he broke your heart. Terry wondered how he could have someone so perfect and throw it all away for another girl. Once Terry had cleaned up the mess defending your honor entailed, he showed up at your apartment to be your shoulder to cry on. What he wouldn’t give to be the boy you loved, Terry thought as he held you in his arms.

A year later, he was, and that made him the happiest boy on the planet, and a lot of people were jealous of you at school, you had a boyfriend who’d open doors for you, walk you to class, and carry your books like you were in some dopy teen romance movie. Others were grossed out by all of the lovey-dovey nonsense.

Even if everyone at school knew you were his, Terry had to fight back the dark urge to mark you so that the entire world would know, but he couldn’t, so he marked himself instead. It wasn’t hard to find a tattoo parlor in Gotham that was willing to break the law and tattoo a fifteen-year-old boy without parental consent.

The artist initially wasn’t going to do it, but Terry had made it very clear that if he couldn’t get a professional to tattoo him, then he was going to do it himself at home. It wasn’t the first time the artist had heard that, but there was something about the look in Terry’s eyes that told her he wasn’t someone to say no to. That if she did so, there would be consequences, so she agreed. Several hours later, Terry walked out with a depiction of your favorite flower, spelling out your name in bold looping cursive with its stem. The tattoo took up most of his inner forearm.

The artist didn’t ask why the kid’s money literally had blood on it, and the next morning she’d block out the news of a dead Joker found in an alley after he’d robbed an ATM.

His folks had been furious when they found out about his fresh tattoo. The last time he’d seen his parents this angry was when he’d been carted off to juvie. Terry had tried to point out his mother had a tattoo herself, but she’d argued that there was a difference between the little picture on her ankle and the name of a girl who he was probably going to break up within a month taking up nearly his entire forearm.

You wouldn’t be so lucky to have the relationship end that quickly, no your place in his life was going to be just as permanent as his new tattoo, you were going to be Terry’s wife one day whether you liked it or not.

When he’d showed it to you, he wasn’t sure what kind of reaction to expect, but honestly, that was fine because you didn’t know how to react. It was beautiful and sweet, but at the same time, the two of you hadn’t been dating long, wasn’t this a bit much? You made the mistake of brushing back that part of your brain and took it as a sign of his commitment, something that was appreciated after the fiasco of your last boyfriend.

Your dad, on the other hand, hated it with a passion, then again, that could have been because he hated the delinquent his daughter ended up with. Your dad didn’t think Terry was good enough for you. A few days later, your dad’s brake lines mysteriously sprung a leak causing him to die in a horrible car accident. Once more in his life, Terry lost control of himself.

Your mother wasn’t the same after, she was distant and spacey, and she’d find a reason to vanish altogether whenever Terry showed up. She wouldn’t let on about it because she was afraid of meeting the same fate, but she’d seen Terry in the garage the night before the crash, your mom had just thought that the boy was slipping off after coming to see you.

Your mom had her suspicions, but no way to prove them. She hated herself for it, but if Terry really did kill her husband, she blamed you for getting involved with the kid. How many times had they warned you the McGinnis boy was no good, and yet you’d insisted he’d reformed, and that may have cost her husband his life.

You’d grown closer to Terry after your father’s death, he was always there when you needed him, you’d tried to return the favor when Mr. McGinnis died, and at first, Terry had let you, but then he met Bruce Wayne.

After the argument with his dad, Terry had come to pick you up for your date, and everything was normal until you’d started to wait in line, and then suddenly Jokerz swarmed the place, one of them grabbed you as he raced by. Anyone standing near Terry at the time felt as if the grim reaper himself was breathing down their neck.

Once, Terry and Bruce had the Jokers incapacitated Terry stomped on the arm of the Joker, who grabbed you with a cry of “This will teach you to touch my girl.” Bruce knew what Terry was as soon as he heard the bone crack.

Ever since Terry started working for Bruce, he was always so busy, and he’d stopped acting like himself, sure in a lot of ways he was still the boy you’d been dating, the one who would pull out chairs for you and hold doors. Yet there was something you couldn’t put your finger on.

It was a slow change at first, as Terry’s tendencies came to the surface a little more often and stayed a few minutes longer as Bruce assured him what he was feeling was completely normal, and then it was all at once. The last of Terry’s traits triggered when you tried to break up with him.

It’d been a year since Terry had started working for Bruce and the neglect just kept getting worse, at first you’d brushed it off as him trying to balance work and school, but now that the two of you had graduated it didn’t seem to be getting any better.

You’d tried to break up with Terry in person, but he kept braking your dates with thin excuses, you’d had to resort to leaving him a voice mail. “I can’t keep doing this, Terry I love you, but I can’t keep playing second fiddle to Bruce Wayne. What I’m trying to say is I don’t think we should be together anymore.” You’d hung up after that, curling up on your bed and crying. He’d been the love of your life and breaking up with Terry hurt, but you knew staying with him would be worse.

Terry had noticed your message as soon as he’d gotten back from stopping Shriek from killing an entire football stadium of people. When he sat down to listen to it, he couldn’t believe what he’d heard, this had to be some kind of cruel joke right, you wouldn’t really leave. He hadn’t even realized he’d thrown his phone until he’d heard it crack on the ground.

“You know Terry, when Bruce and I were younger, I tried to leave him,” Mrs. Wayne said from the top of the Batcave stairs.

“Really, how did the two of you fix it,” Terry asked, and Mrs. Wayne told him.

The last thing you remembered before waking up in a strange room, with the worst headache of your life, was Terry showing up in your bedroom begging for another chance, and you telling him you’d already given him more chances then you could handle. A look you’d never seen before flashed across Terry’s face, just as he’d lunged at you with a needle.

You stopped breathing for a second when he walked in.

“Sweetheart, I know I’ve been a bad boyfriend, but I can’t live without you, I’ll do better you’ll see,” Terry said after he shut the door behind him.

Tags:

@yanderepeterparker​

@idkmanicantenglish

@prettyafghan

Grow up as only

@neon-phosphorecsent

@foggyturtleknightangel

#Yandere DC #yandere dc comics #Yandre batman beyond #Yandere Batfam #Yandere Batboys #Yandere Terry mcginnis #Terry McGinnis #yandere x reader #yandere dc comics x reader #x reader #Yandere Terry McGinnis x reader #reader insert #CITD writes #Part six #finale #The Batboys Growing Up as Yanderes

[spxcemuses]

Which unpopular stereotype are you?

Mok:

the higher power

you’re the best, you’ve always been the best, and now everyone who’s ever doubted you is gone. you’ve gotten everything you wanted. you smoked all your competition. but something inside of you just won’t settle. all the evil of the world is still out there, all the big problems that you never got around to. in spite of your skill, this is something you simply can’t handle yourself. but that’s ok. you’ve got new, shiny pawns to play with. you know how to make people do what you want. the ends justify the means, right? / / personality: talented, calculating, overbearing / / counterpart: the ghost

Tzekel-Kan:

the higher power

you’re the best, you’ve always been the best, and now everyone who’s ever doubted you is gone. you’ve gotten everything you wanted. you smoked all your competition. but something inside of you just won’t settle. all the evil of the world is still out there, all the big problems that you never got around to. in spite of your skill, this is something you simply can’t handle yourself. but that’s ok. you’ve got new, shiny pawns to play with. you know how to make people do what you want. the ends justify the means, right? / / personality: talented, calculating, overbearing / / counterpart: the ghost

Thrax:

the killer

you got fucked up something awful. sorry. i dont know why or when it got so bad for you, but now that heat feels so true to you that it’s hard to imagine a you without it. there’s nothing grand about the damage you do. it isn’t the kind that people write stories about. for this reason, it’ll be a while before anyone stops you, if they ever come around to it. it’s all the more likely that you’ll have to dig your own way out of this pit. one day you won’t even remember how blood tasted. the rage won’t keep you warm forever, killer! 

/ / personality: intense, introspective, edgy / / counterpart: the dark horse

Rick: 

the ghost

you left them behind, but a part of you comes back at night. you’re in their dreams and just outside their doorway. you’ll haunt them forever. the people you love. the people you hate. everyone who’s ever been afraid of you. they’ll remember your face, your hands, your eyes in the dark. you’re the reason they don’t sleep easy. there was no epilogue when you died, but the whole story is drenched with your requiem. you live on forever in their memories. you’ll always be missed, ghost. / / personality: memorable, shy, spooky / / counterpart: the higher power

tagged by stolen from: @thxwxlf​ tagging: too tired to tag atm, steal it >:) also why do i imagine this is like, what kind of ghost are you gonna come back as lkdsjfklsd, feels like that to me-

#. dash games #i swear with the first two i had different answers ugh #they do kinda fit tho #rick and morty

[mugglemirror]

Ask For Writers

A bunch of thanks to @theisolatedlily and @soldouthaz for tagging me. This was fun!

1. Describe how you first started writing and when you first posted: My high school English teacher always encouraged me to write and that’s how it started. I wrote a lot of poetry before starting fiction/fan-fic and started posting earlier this year.

2. Which of your characters do you typically resonate most closely with? Do you base any characters off of yourself? Every character I write has a part of me, not just in the writing sense but also some traits of mine. I tend to write from Harry’s pov or any other character that is Louis’ romantic interest in the story, entirely because it’s a lot easier to write about Louis rather than as him.

3. Where do you often find inspiration? Real life mostly. Songs, movies and books as well.

4. Has quarantine helped or hindered your writing process? Didn’t notice much of a difference really.

5. Do you listen to music/noise while you write or do you prefer silence? I prefer silence when I write, helps me focus. Rarely do I find a song that fits perfectly with a scene so I have that on repeat until I can’t.

6. What is your biggest writing pet peeve in your writing or in general? People who say only authors with popular works deserve to be called writers.

7. Describe your ideal writing setup ink stains on my hand, fountain pen scribbling smoothly over the paper and a lamp as the only source of light. Somewhere warm and cozy.

8. Favourite time of day to write? Dawn and after midnight.

9. Favourite genre to write + one you’d like to try writing in the future? Horror, fantasy, magical realism, historical and dark elements. Sci-fi is a genre that is way out of my comfort zone so probably that.

10. Do you struggle with writer’s block? How do you typically overcome it? All the bloody time lmaoo. Usually I stick to songs that I enjoy listening, switch genres or plots to overcome the block.

11. What is the easiest part of your writing process and the most difficult? Everything other than outlining is my fav part. Outlining is one pain in the ass.

12. How do you come up with original characters? (If applicable) real life is where the key is.

13. What is your favourite and least favourite word? Least fav: moist fav: tasavvur (it’s an Urdu word that translates into imagination or contemplation)

14. What is one thing about your writing that you’re really proud of and one thing you hope to continue working at? I’m really glad I can paint the imagery of a scene quite well. Paragraph starters is what I’m working on atm.

15. What work of yours has your favourite ‘verse/world building? How did you come up with it? The Blood of Love is one of my best work and I say this very humbly. The atmosphere, the themes, the overshadowing, everything I wrote of it, I absolutely love it and am proud of it.

16. What font and size do you write in? Single spaced or double? Georgia, 11, single spaced.

17. What is a typo(s) you find yourself making consistently? Leaving out apostrophise.

18. (If applicable) do you separate fic writing from fandom? Most of the times. When I’m writing canon, I look into the fandom for inspo.

19. What emotion is you’re favourite to write? Which is the most difficult? Fear is my fav emotion to write, as weird as that sounds. I find writing humour very challenging.

20. What is one thing you hope readers always take away from your works? Writers put a lot of their time into fics and appreciation for the work is always heart-warming. Other than that, I wish more people noticed the overshadowing and metaphors used.

21. What is the best and worst writing advice you’ve ever received? No writing advice is bad. What may work for one may not be suited for other. You may not like what you’ve written today but you can always come back and edit it to your likeness.

22. Which one of your works would you most want to see turned into a film/television show? The Blood of Love for sure! Also a wip: inked memory aka ghost rider au

23. Do you write scenes chronologically or out of order? I write whichever scene I want to and then align them chronologically.

24. How do you handle criticism? Honest and genuine criticism is always welcomed, not spiteful J

25. What is the advice you would give to someone who is looking to start writing? Write because you want and not because you have to. Forcing it won’t do any good. It’s alright to not write when you don’t feel like it but don’t let that get you lazy.

26. What kind of feedback on your work always makes your day? Repeating myself here hehe but when readers notice the foreshadowing and metaphors I use, it brings the biggest smile on my face

27. Which fic ‘verse of your own would you most like to exist in? Which fic’s characters would you most like to befriend? The Blood of Love is a universe I’d love to exist in. Louis’ character from my estranged actor au and Harry from tbol really speak to me.

28. What do you always enjoy getting asks about/wish people would ask about more? Backstories about my characters and fic and my imagination. It runs wild lol

29. What has writing added to your life? How has it changed you? It’s helped me a lot to see from other people’s perspective and read body language in a better way.

30. Why do you write? It helps organize my thoughts and be more coherent in a way that imp not when speaking.

Boost yourself + tags! 

1a. share the last sentence you wrote "Before sunset," he says. It's not entirely true. Part of him wishes he could go now but Harry isn't sure if he'd be able to survive without kissing Louis.

2a. describe the wip you’re most excited about: the sequel to The Blood of Love!! We’re gonna get Zayn out, we’re gonna make zourry suffer a little and some zarry beef. And ofc, loads on magic, horror and dark elements.

3a. share the piece of dialogue from one of your works you’re most proud of: “Falling in love with you was never a choice, Louis,” Harry says through his tears.

4a. share the best first and last lines from your work(s): “Of all the things Louis’ done in his life, falling in love with Harry is perhaps the easiest thing he ever did.” — first line

“Louis flushed but dived in for another kiss, sealing this newfound happiness with the kiss of their love.” — last line.

5a. link the last fic you read. Don’t remember which one it was, sorry.

6a. link the last work you published: Cant link the blff yet so The Blood of Love it is.

7a. link to your ao3 (if applicable): Mugglemirror

8a. someone that inspires you: Can I say Louis? I’m saying Louis. And Taylor!

9a. a comfort fic/work that you’ve been grateful for this year: I haven’t done much reading this year, fandom wise but I’m really looking forward to read all the amazing blff fics.

10a. other writers that you’d like to tag! @yvesaintlourent @thepolourryexpress @lads-laddylads @babieloui @falsegoodnight @ashleyjohnsonfanaccount @allwaswell16

#writer asks #challenges #interactions #writer things

[tarithenurse]

Stolen - 2

Pairing: Loki Laufeyson &/x fem!gifted!reader Content: Angsting, bit of rough handling. Mostly plot though. A/N: Thanks for the interest so far <3 Feel free to ask for tagging and always (please) remember that you are welcome to reblog, comment etc. I love feedback and it helps me stay motivated (+ I want to get better at writing). Atm, I will not pick specific update days due to Covid19 work and all it entails.

2. Misery Machine

...  Reader   ...

There’s a storm raging inside you, the force nauseating and frightening as the chaos disables any logical thinking. Around you, the world has changed. Your apartment has been replaced by the interior of what could be a ship. Or a submarine. Or a bloody spaceship. Metal walls in drab colours blur past you while Loki drags you down the narrow hall before shoving you over the high threshold to a small room (“room” might be too grand a word, actually).

“Before you try, let me help you by divulging a fact -” Loki grins, the smile never bringing any warmth to his eye, “you cannot escape. If I let you run...oh, it would be fun to hunt you down...if you run, there’s no way off the ship and even less hope for you outside. No one’s coming to your rescue. No one is out there to see and save you.”

“Perhaps not.” You hate the shrill sound of your voice. “Keep me prisoner for as long as you want. I will never help you!”

The male who had dragged Aïsha in steps forward much quicker than you could ever have anticipated from someone that bulky and you don’t have time to dodge the thundering punch to the jaw that sends you sprawling across the floor where you only come to a halt as your shoulders and back hit something.

…   Loki  ...

“Arox.” The oaf turns from the dazed Midgardian with a puzzled look on his face. “If you lay a hand on her again, I will control your mind and make you flush yourself out of the airlock. Are we clear?”

“Uhh...yeees.” Arox rubs the back of his neck so roughly the intricate patterns on his skin are distorted. “But uh but ehm...what if she tries to escape?”

Stay calm. “You let me know and I’ll deal with it. This one is not to be harmed. We need her intact.”

Behind the brute, [Y/N] shakes her head in an effort to regain her bearings. Blood is dribbling from her mouth, mixing with the involuntarily shed tears on a cheek that already is swelling just like the fear in the rest of her features at the realization of what just happened. Perhaps she can come to fear me less? A simple order sends Arox away.

She's a curious thing. Defiant, impossibly weak yet ready to attempt besting him at his own game. Loki sees the way she shrinks away as he walks over to pull her up by the arm, his icy fingers digging into the soft, warm flesh for a moment until she's on the bed.

"I won't," she whimpers, "I won't help you."

"You don't even know what it is I require from you."

He can see the hesitation in the way [Y/N]'s mouth is gaping slightly, the tongue quickly wetting the lips before she takes to worrying the bottom one with her teeth. It's almost endearing. Innocent.

"It can't be anything good if it's you."

Ah, there we go. The Jotun should expect resent from her kind, he should be prepared for the hatred aimed at him even now that Odin is far away. Still...the words are a stab to his heart similar to earlier when -

"Believe what you want. Eventually, you will do as I tell you."

With that, Loki stalks out of the cabin, making sure to lock the door securely.

…   Reader  ...

Your insides are burning with anger, matching the throbbing ache of your face until you allow yourself to heal the damage the brute made. Arox. More like “a rock”. You cringe both at the bad pun and the situation. I'm so fucked.

Finally seeing straight, you tiptoe to the door and press an ear against the cold metal (not quite as cold as Loki) but no sound makes it through to you. It's too tempting not to try for freedom even if the plan already is hampered by lack of an obvious way to open the door. You do find it quickly, though: a sensor on the panel prompts a warning in red accompanied by a pictogram showing a rectangle with a red cross over.

"Damnit! OUW!" Apparently a kick doesn't make any difference either.

It's so tempting, leaning against the immovable surface, to break down and cry – the catharsis would be unparalleled for the duration of the tantrum. But then what? You'd still be stuck fuck-knows-where with a maniac of a god and his muscle man. Besides...you can't let Loki have that win.

Looking around the room properly for the first time, it becomes evident that the place is meant as a personal space rather than a prison cell: there's a desk with a rubbery sort of stool or chair (it looks more like a mushroom) moulded into the floor and the bed had felt quite comfortable. Slotted seamlessly under the bed and into the walls are drawers and cabinets of various proportions, but it's the door at the other end of the room that gets your heart beating with excitement at the prospect of escape however slim the chance might be. Don't be a fool. Callous words of warning in your mind does nothing to prepare you for the disappointment when you find yourself in a tight and practical bathroom. There's no way out, except through the door Loki used and locked behind him.

A tiny whimper escapes your throat before a sob chokes you from deep inside the chest as if it's pulling not just the air but your lungs, heart, and soul into a black hole of despair and there's nothing you can do as the floor comes blurring up to greet you with a crash that jars your bones.

#Loki Laufeyson #Loki x you #Loki x reader #Loki mcu #Mcu Fanfic #mcu Fanfiction #loki #Loki Laufeyson x reader #Loki Laufeyson x you #slow burn #enemies to lovers #Loki fanfic #loki fanfiction #fanfic series #fanfiction series #trope game #from enemies to lovers #hate #love #angst #abduction #Post-New York #Alternate timeline #He stole the tessaract during endgame #he wants to burn down the place #no regerts #spite #panic #hopeless

[chaoticspacefam]

I was tagged by @darth-bagel thank you! I shall tag (no pressure as always and feel free to ignore!) : @a-muirehen , @palepinkycat , @walk-ng-d-saster , @kyber-heart and @berriku <3

Rules: Answer 30 questions and tag 5 blogs you are contractually obligated to know better.

Name/Nickname: I usually go by Elf/Elven online, tho my gf also calls me Boyscout (it’s an inside joke we have XD)

Gender: Cis female

Star sign: Taurus  ♉

Height: 5′4″ (I can’t believe I’m actually taller than someone, sorry Bagel!)

Birthday: April 21st. Prolly gonna be spending another birthday in lockdown but hey, at least I can either play SWTOR with some buds or ARK with dad this time so that’ll prob be what I’ll be doing. Gotta make the most of it

Time: as I’m finishing this to post it, it is 1:22pm

Favorite bands: I have a lot so hold onto your hats lmao: Fall Out Boy, Glass Animals, Panic! At The Disco, Hop Along (not sure if these two still count as bands or if they’d fall under solo now...), MISSIO, 30 Seconds to Mars, Shinedown, Lord Huron is apparently a band now too tho he started solo owo, The Oh Hellos, Of Monsters And Men, The Antlers, PVRIS, Bastille, Young Heretics, Dorothy, The Crane Wives, The Mountain Goats

Favorite solo artists: Hozier, Willyecho (pretty sure he’s solo? XD), Billie Eilish, Ed Sheeran, Lorde, Mikky Ekko, Iron & Wine, Marina (& The Diamonds), Florence & The Machine, EDEN, P!nk, Keaton Henson, Amanda Palmer, Halsey, Radical Face, grandson, Lincoln

Song stuck in my head: as of this morning, The Mighty Fall by Fall Out Boy

Last movie: Uuuhh, pretty sure it was Hotel Transylvania 2, I was feeling icky the other day and needed to laugh so XD

Last show: The Alien Worlds series on Netflix, it’s really cool even if I wish they’dve come up with better names for the alien critters ¬_¬

When did I create this blog: Oh, not that long ago actually, funnily enough. I’ve been in and out of tumblr for a long while but never made my own blog(s) till about March last year (2020)

What do I post: this blog is exclusively SWTOR (and KOTOR) related stuff, anything from awesome art, writing and headcanons from mutuals, to my own art, screencaps from my and mutuals’ gameplay, to my own fics, headcanons and stuff. My other blog is for “canon” Star Wars, general fandom/gaming stuff etc. Very occasionally I might post non-swtor posts like this one here if I feel it “belongs” in the “get to know elven” tag

Last thing I googled: "acnh how many villagers can you have” - I wasn’t sure what the limit was and I play sporadically so I didn’t know, don’t laugh at me LMAO

Other blogs: just my other/main blog: @itstheelvenjedi​ . There’s “canon”-era Star Wars, LotR/The Hobbit stuff as well as a little bit of Warrior Cats, other gaming (mainly ARK: Survival Evolved atm), as well as a tiny bit of politics and ranty stuff. All is properly tagged so you can block any tags you don’t want to see.

Do I get asks: I do! I’m kinda slow answering them sometimes but I promise if you send me one I will always answer it and I appreciate every single one <3

Why I chose my url: ok, so, my mains are mostly wlw - except for Kas - (and yes, wlw can use the word “lesbian” if we want to, as a demisexual wlw person I will beat you with my crutch, fuck off, it’s a blanket wlw term just like “sapphic” and you don’t get to decide what I can and cannot call myself or my characters, you’re not me), they’re chaotic and they live in the SWTOR verse which is sometimes affectionately called a “space opera” so: chaoticspacelesbians. my main blog is because “TheElvenJedi” has been my main online pseud since about 2014, but theelvenjedi was apparently taken when I made my tumblr so I had to add something else to the beginning, therefore I went with itstheelvenjedi cause it was the closest thing to theelvenjedi and easy for me to remember XD

Following: 229 apparently (oop. I should probably....go through that and trim out the year+ inactive blogs huh o.o)

Followers: 90 (holy crackers where did you all come from LMAO am I really that funny???)

Average hours of sleep: I try to stick to at least 7, sometimes when insomnia hits tho it’s more like 4... >__<

Lucky number: 4 again! I just really dig it, it’s a cool number.

Instruments: I used to play recorder, and I took a couple drum lessons in primary school but couldn’t afford to keep it up ;-; it was fun while it lasted tho!

What am I wearing: ...my pyjamas and a dressing gown. It’s cold and I don’t have to go out or expect visitors today so I’m staying warm. Don’t judge me LOL

Dream job: I would’ve loved to have done either Riding Groom/Jockey (which I might have managed 6 or so years back but uhhh, I can’t handle the physical strain anymore, thanks granny joints!) or Animal Assisted Therapy, but there’s no way I can cope with managing my own business, it’s too much for me qwq A lot of things are Too Much For Me, unfortunately. I will take working checkout at a grocery store at the rate I’m going now tbh.

Dream trip: 1) to visit the gf in Germany and see the Christmas Markets there, and also 2) to go to New Zealand and visit the Hobbit/LotR sets and see all the wildlife :’D

Favorite food: Mac n cheese, it’s just...so good....

Nationality: South African/British (yes, I am in fact dual-national even if my SA passport has expired and I can’t find money to renew it, it’s on my birth certificate and in my blood so HAH)

Favorite song: I have...a few... but uhh Bruno Is Orange - Hop Along Bury Me Face Down - grandson Domestic Bliss - Glass Animals (TW: abuse mention, abusive relationship) Raise Hell - Dorothy Woman King - Iron & Wine Save Rock n Roll - Fall Out Boy Saint Bernard - Lincoln I could go on for a while but these are the ones that oft live in my head rent-free XD

Last book read: I don’t even know, tbh....I haven’t been able to focus on reading in a while 😅

Top three fictional universes I’d like to live in:

1. SWtOR (obviously. Gimme a lightsaber and Force powers, stat!)

2. LotR/The Hobbit

3. ARK: Survival Evolved (I’d prolly get eaten by a t-rex or a spino in like 5 mins but hey, the thought of actually having a bunch of pet prehistoric animals is nice~)

#not swtor #get to know elven #i was gonna put this on my main blog but since i have more followers here & *technically* this is the blog bagel tagged #XD #plus i don't post much about *me* here and this is impersonal enough that it feels safe to share with y'all #some proof i am an actual living being behind a screen and not some sort of pro-empire robot #hahahaha

[mimiswitchywrites]

Not A Burden: Chapter 8

TW: SH references, attempted s****de and references, child/s***al a**se references (not graphic but enough that could be triggering).

period typical h***ph*bia

Master list or read on AO3

2.6k words

If you want to be tagged for updates, message me or comment!

Hardly proof read this one so apologies if that's obvious. Going to take a week break from this because I am STRESSED atm and this is just a passion project.

------------

Miriam awoke to Merlin’s face, barely an inch from hers. He was poking her arm with the cheeky grin of a toddler that has just done something it knows it shouldn’t have done. She rolled her eyes and turned her head, trying to go back to sleep.

The poking got worse. It migrated to her back and her neck and her forehead until she snapped, grabbing his wrist, and yanking so hard that he ended sprawled on the stone floor with a groan.

“What the fuck, Miriam?”

“What the fuck yourself, Merlin. How did you not expect poking someone to end badly for you?” came her muffled voice, face still in the pillow.

He groaned again, rubbing his cheek which had taken most of the impact. He was sure it would bruise and not so sure he would want to explain it to anyone. He would never live it down with Arthur. Miriam pushed herself up, so she was sitting, and then leant down to lift Merlin up. He leant his back against the cot so his head was in line with her knees (he kept an eye on them in case she went to knee him in the face – he wouldn’t put it past her while in her ‘just woken up’ grump). She took his chin gently and moved his head round to face her. Her thumb grazed the quickly reddening mark and she frowned.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to pull you that hard.” He shrugged in response, trying to remember which book he had read about a spell for healing small wounds such as bruises. “What are you after?”

“I spoke to Lancelot during training this morning and he mentioned getting you a job in the kitchens and I said I’d handle it for him, seeing as I am already part of the staff and Cook sort of trusts me.” She nodded, rubbing the sleep from her eyes. He looked at he expectantly. “Well?”

“Well, what?”

“Shall we go?”

She kept looking at him, brow cocked in confusion.

“To the kitchens? Getting you a job?” Her eyes opened wide, and mouth dropped along with the penny.

“You mean now?” He nodded, rolling his eyes cheekily. She stood, looking down at the dress that she had been in since last night. The other one still hadn’t been washed.

“Can I borrow some clothes? And I should wash quickly, and maybe do something with my hair? How does it look?” She turned around, hands flapping with anxiety. He laughed, standing up and gripping her arms to still her. He bent down a little to lock eyes with her, “You look perfect, it’s okay. There’s a bowl of fresh water on the stool by the fireplace and I’ll put some clothes on my bed for you. Hurry up.” She nodded, rushing over to the water as he went to his room.

--

The pair stood outside the kitchens in silence. Merlin leant against the wall as he watched Miriam pace back and forth, biting her thumb and jumping with flapping hands every so often. She a pair of his trousers with rolled up cuffs, and his spare bed shirt with a thick belt to pull her waist in. Her hair was in its fourth style: a braid that was balled up with leather cord at the base of her neck. She had nervously fiddled with the front of her hair and so a few strands had come loose but Merlin thought it was cute (he didn’t dare tell her or she would have started the cycle of brushing and pulling it into place all over again.)

The door opened and George strode out with plates and a goblet balanced across his arms. He was the epitome of grace but still looked like too much of a snob for Merlin to appreciate it. The slam of wood against wood shocked Miriam back to reality. “Maybe I shouldn’t do this. No, I think it’s actually a really bad idea and I’ve never worked in a castle before, let alone one as big and as important as this and I could poison the King! I have the power to do that! And you know what, if Arthur annoyed me again, I can’t say I wouldn’t so really, it’s best if I don’t go in there. Let’s go.” She turned on her heel, heading down the corridor. Merlin watched on, amused smile gracing his lips.

She turned abruptly, serious look on her face, and made her way back. “I am a really good baker though and I do mostly like Arthur now so it would be nice to make him something as thanks for helping me through the castle last night.” Merlin shook his head at this, still a little peeved at his awakening that morning. Noticing Miriam’s face drop as she prepared to go on yet another self-doubting monologue, he jumped in.

“You’ll be great, and Cook will keep a close eye on you for a while and Arthur had tasters to make sure no one poisons him, it’s okay.”

“He does?”

“Well sometimes, usually it’s me pinching a few bits before I get to his chambers but- “

“Oh gods, I’ll poison you! Arthur and Gaius kill me!”

“You’re not going to poison anyone, okay?” she nodded, eyes still frantic. He took a deep breath, motioning for her to copy. “Now, lets go talk to Cook, okay?” She nodded again, calmer now. He put his arm behind her back, careful to not actually touch her as he had no desire to have a repeat of earlier and lead her through the door.

Inside, Cook was shouting at some young boy that was covered in broth from head to toe. There was a large saucepan on the floor with its content covering almost the whole back corner of the room. “-insolent child, stealing our good Kings food and ruining it for the rest of the staff! Do you want to ruin our hard work, is that it?” Miriam paled. The boy shook his head, close to tears. Cook sighed and gestured to the door, reaching for a clean saucepan when he didn’t move.

Merlin cleared his throat.

“Merlin! What are you after now?” She sounded frustrated still, but the corner of her mouth was curled up into a smile.

“This,” he waved his hands in Miriam’s direction, “Is Miriam. She is new in Camelot and maybe also new in your kitchens…? I can confirm that she does not steal food, very good at that, really.” He smiled his most charming smile, flashing his teeth a little. Cook rolled her eyes, beckoning Miriam over.

She stumbled over her own feet a little before coming to a stop, about a meter away from Cook and the saucepan she was still waving around. “What do you think you can offer me that I don’t already have, little girl?” She took a step forward with each word, ending far too into Miriam’s personal bubble.

“Saffron cake?” She shook her head, face evolving into something more confident as she thought about the foods she had mastered over the years. “And mince pies – a special recipe with fruit instead of meat – and the best bloody bread you’ve ever tasted. Even cut it into shapes and I know I could bake it into the Pendragon crest if you let me. Ma’am.” She tacked on, dropping into a small curtsy with head bowed.

The trio stood in silence before Cook broke it, belting a laugh that made the whole kitchen turn to watch them. She slapped Miriam’s arm in a friendly manner, the girl bracing herself so not to go sprawling. “Quite something, aren’t you, girl? ‘Ma’am’, well I never.” She shook her head turning in a circle to look at their crowd. With a wave of her hand, everyone went back to work. “You after pay?”

Miriam turned to Merlin who nodded.

“Well, you can work here for the week so I can get a judge of ya, and then we’ll go about pay with the Steward, ’ight?” Miriam’s face split into a smile, the widest she had since arriving in Camelot, and she tripped over thanks. “Not to worry, love. Now, Merlin, the Kings food is on the side there, but I better not hear no more about you pinching bits or I’ll have your head, you ‘ear me?” She lifted the pan above her head and Miriam could tell that she was a genuine threat with it. Merlin’s eyes widened and smile dropped. He nodded quickly, picking up the plate and rushing out the room.

Cook lowered the saucepan, looking to Miriam again.

“You want to start now? The name is Bea by the way, but you’ll call me only call me that when you’re off shift, ‘ight?” Miriam nodded and Bea threw her an apron. “Let’s see what you’ve got then.”

--

Miriam made her way to the courtyard after what felt like the longest shift of her life, covered in flour and a few splashes of egg that the girl next to her had accidentally spilt. She found her way with only two wrong turns (one of which led to a cupboard which rattled and seemed to be moaning; Miri turned and left quickly). The sun was beginning to set, the grounds getting chilly quickly. She rubbed her arms through Merlin’s shirt and began to wander across the cobbles. She got lost in her thoughts, playing through the day she’d had in the castle kitchens. Bea was very sweet, even if she did put up a defensive exterior. She praised Miriam’s work, taking a few items to eat herself which made Miriam smile.

She could see herself working in those kitchens and hoped that Bea and the Steward would let her.

Miriam was pulled from her thoughts when a hand landed on her shoulder. She spun round, pulling herself away, to face Gwen.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to shock you!” Gwen’s face drained, worried for Miriam. The latter laughed, hand on her chest to calm her racing heart.

“It’s okay, I was lost in my head.”

Gwen nodded, colour returning to those beautiful cheeks of hers. She stuck her arm out and the new girl took her elbow. They set off, not really going anywhere.

“You began working in the kitchens today, didn’t you?”

Miriam nodded, “It wasn’t paid but yes, Lancelot and Merlin arranged it for me.” Her face split into a grin, the widest Gwen had seen from her since arriving a week ago. “I think Bea liked me, she certainly took a few of my cakes!” They laughed, Miriam tentatively placing her spare hand on Gwen’s shoulder and giving her an affectionate squeeze.

Breathing hitching, Gwen forced her mouth to listen to her brain. “That was sweet of them, you must really appreciate Lancelot for doing that?” She hoped the desperation wasn’t clear in her voice. Miriam mulled the question over for a second, trying to figure out the best wording.

“I am grateful that he helped get me a job, especially baking, but I fear he did it for his own gain to some degree.” When Gwen didn’t reply, she continued. “He made us a little picnic to have at midnight last night with food I think he stole from the kitchens, and there were beautiful candles and we stayed out until sunrise and, I am less sure about this part, when we got back to Gaius’ chambers, I think he was going to kiss me.” Gwen gasped, heart dropping and an uncomfortable feeling bubbling.

“What happened?”

Miri giggled thinking about it, “Merlin came rushing out and practically toppled me down the stairs! He was barely dressed, poor boy, and was on his way to search the castle for me because he and Gaius thought I had gone missing!” Gwen burst out laughing, the bubbling feeling calming down.

“That does sound like our Merlin.”

They continued in silence, just appreciating each other’s company. They made their way closer to each other, shoulders brushing together occasionally. Miriam looked away from Gwen so the girl wouldn’t see how her cheeks were reddening.

“What would you have done if you hadn’t been interrupted? Would – would you have kissed him back?” Gwen cringed at the stutter in her voice, hoping to all the gods that she wouldn’t notice.

“I truly don’t know. Pushed him away I guess, I certainly wouldn’t have reciprocated.” Gwen couldn’t help the way she smiled at this, walking with more of a bounce in her step. “What about you, what would you do if he tried to kiss you? He certainly isn’t ugly.”

Gwen stopped, turning to face Miriam. “He has already tried. We were somewhat courting once upon a time.” Miri’s face dropped, she looked back at the castle, fiddling with the cuff of her too big sleaves.

“Oh.” She tried to form the rest of the sentence but couldn’t, all she could picture was Lancelot pressing Gwen against a wall, mouth traveling down her exposed neck.

“It was short lived; we didn’t work out. He wants someone to love him with all their heart and I couldn’t bring myself to do that. He was mighty kind about it all though. He’s a good man, one of the best I know, but not made for me.”

“Have you met the man that is made for you, yet?”

Gwen took Miriam’s arm again, walking further towards the lower town. “Sometimes I think there isn’t a man for me. Not that there is no one that will love me – I know there is, what’s not to like about me?” They giggled but Miriam couldn’t help but list all the things she already loved about the girl, even if they had known each other barely a week. “But I have been with two men now, truly been with them if you understand, and something feels wrong about it. I can’t believe that a man exists that would make me feel otherwise.”

Miris mouth worked before her brain could process what she was saying, “Maybe there is a woman that exists that could satisfy you as they can’t.” She slapped her hands over her lips, eyes wide in shock. Gwen choked on her breath, both blushing furiously. “I am so sorry; I shouldn’t have suggested something as – as vile as that.” For a second Miriam thought Gwen’s face dropped in disappointment, but it was back to normal too quick to be sure. “I’m sorry, I have had such a long day in the kitchens, I should make my way back home now. It was lovely to see you.” She pulled her arm from where they had been connected, and turned on her heel, heading back up town. She waved over her shoulder, “bye Gwen!”

--

Miriam made it back to Gaius’ chambers before letting herself think about what she had just done. Merlin was sat at the table, reading some tome looking book. Miri’s brain was racing so fast that she couldn’t decipher a word as she sat next to him. His head shot up; book slamming shut. He rushed to cover it with some others, stacking them on top of each other before turning to the worn-down girl. Her head hung low, eyes wide and darting round the room, and her lip was beginning to bleed from chewing it so much. She was furiously picking at the skin next to her nail and that turning red raw.

“Miriam?” Merlin lifted her chin to look her over fully. “What’s wrong?”

She threw her arms around him, a soft ‘oof’ slipping past his lips.

“I fucked up everything with Gwen.”

He could do little but rub sympathetic circles on her back.

#merlin x arthur #merthur #merlin fic #Merlin #BBC merlin #Gwen x reader #Queer Gwen #Queer reader #queer characters #Gwen x oc #Queer oc #gwen x lancelot #Lancelot x oc

[ghost-town-story]

It’s late but I have Thoughts about fanfic ideas that I just want to get out so here goes lol

So there’s two different fanfic ideas I have floating around in my head rn. One of them is The Umbrella Academy shit. The other one is The Unwanteds. I’ll do TUA first since it’s better known lol (tho the TUA idea is newer than the Unwanteds one)

The Umbrella Academy fanfic

So this idea basically came about bc i’m a slut for servant/master fics (you know, with the illicit secret meetings and that shit? ya, you know the stuff), and somehow this idea popped into my head

Where the Hargreeves are the royal family. (are the 7 kids all the same age? or in age according to number? who knows? not me atm lol)

Either way, Vanya is still the seventh child, the last in line for the throne, the most looked over

Harold/Leonard has a bone to pick with Papa Hargreeves and his entire administration, so he infiltrates the castle as a servant

He meets Vanya, sparks fly, yaddah yaddah that’s about as far as I’ve gotten with this. Kinda wanna write it but gotta figure more stuff out first

The Unwanteds

Buckle your gotdamned seatbelts, bc I have a lotta vaguely related ideas for this AU. Also it’s been years since I’ve read the Unwanteds and I haven’t finished the series so rip. 

The basics of it is: it’s a high school AU. Or a college AU. I can’t decide which would work better atm. Again, it’s been years since I’ve read the books, and my only notes for this au are from tags of a post I reblogged ages ago

So basically. High school or college. Wherever the kiddos go. The art department is like, really separated from the rest of the school Like, really separated And like, really shunned too

So Justine would be like, the principal/president of the school, and Mr. Today would be the vice-principal (or whatever college equivalent that is), and also the head of the arts department.

So like, obviously, we have Aaron, who’s going to go into the military or the government or some shit like that And darling Alex, the artsy disappointment to his parents

I also have no plot for this just as a heads up right now

So Simber is a cat that hangs around, maybe he’s a stray that wandered in, or maybe he’s a teacher’s cat, but he basically ends up living in the arts buildings. He gets nicknamed a cheetah because his fur is almost constantly splattered with paint (students would make sure to only splash him with kitty-safe paint. does it exist? i don’t know). And years ago, some sculptor made him wings, and he loves them and hisses if you try to take them off

Spike is just a normal ass fish lol. So like, there’s this empty fish tank in one of the classrooms, just fully equipped to handle a fish, but minus the actual fish bc something something nobody ever got around to getting another fish. But Alex just stares at this fish tank day after day, until he finally comes in one day and just plops a fish in. And that’s Spike! Simber gets jealous of Spike (if i remember correctly that actually correlates from the series lol but just. lil kitty staking his claim on Alex, trying to one-up a fish that doesn’t know what the hap is fuckening)

Jim’s the resident turtle, and somebody painted his shell years ago (would also have to be with animal-friendly paints)

There’s squirrelcorn sculptures hanging from the ceiling bc nobody has the heart to take them down

The blackboards are PA announcers

And eventually Alex and Aaron would come back to take over for Mr. Today and Justine

That’s about all I have right now, but like dude, this AU’s been floating around in my head for YEARS. Too bad I don’t have a fuckin PLOT

#writing #in which i write #ramble ramble #fanfic stuff #the umbrella academy #the unwanteds

[enchantedamusedslightlyconfused]

73 questions.

I was tagged by @wescoasts @machine-gun-casie (BABES)

Almost all my friends have been tagged and I don't wanna be that asshole so ill try not to be. I tag @awkwardrocker @backoftheroomandnotbelonging @trixiehoe @she-who-is-timey-wimey

On a scale of 1-10, how excited are you about life right now?

Well it’s finals week so about -864. After that I have two weeks of legitimate nothing where I will bake my heart out so we’ll see

Describe yourself in a hashtag?

#yikes #ughshesinherfeelsagain 

If you could do a love scene with anyone, who would it be?

Milo Ventimiglia, Kells, Rook.....being a music video love interest is only my life’s pipe dream 

If your life was a musical, what would the marquee say?

And that’s on daddy issues and no supervision...

What’s one thing people don’t know about you?

I used to model like went to modeling school and got paid for it type shit

What’s your wakeup ritual?

get woken up by my dog tired of hearing my alarm, walk said opinionated quadruped, feed quadruped, get dressed, COFFEE, then take life as it comes

What’s your go to bed ritual?

melatonin gummies (gotta make anxiety fun), skincare when executive dysfunction will allow, brush teeth, fight dog for my spot in bed (moving a 90lb animal is no joke), turn on my sleep playlist or use my ambient noise app, stare at ceiling

What’s your favorite time of day?

witching hour followed by golden hour

Your go to for having a good laugh?

lately tiktok and Kellyvisions, previously vine compilations or Netflix specials

Dream country to visit?

Ireland. I NEED to go to the motherland. My families castle is still standing and I get in for free. its on my bucket list FOR SURE. 

What’s the biggest surprise you’ve had?

getting into nursing school and chiropractic school. I’m a loser and I’ve never had a surprise party. I’d melt in puddle of love tbh

Heels or flats/sneakers?

Flats 98% of the time. Heels are reserved for business casual necessity, Halloween, or if I’m feeling myself 

Vintage or new?

both, depends on the item

Who do you want to write your obituary?

Amy-Sherman Palladino 

Style icon?

lmao a what? on the real though catch me fucking with those eco-friendly kitchen witch vibes. All the dainty jewelry, linens and converse/docks fam

What are three things you can’t live without?

my dog, my family (found and blood), healing people however I can (medicine ruined me for any other career and its sucks you guys)

What’s one ingredient you put in everything?

tbh salt, I question a recipes validity if salt isn't involved 

What 3 people living or dead would you like to make dinner for?

Kells and the band (I'd be too nervous for a one on one), a dinner party with my MGK fam, Elvis

What’s your biggest fear in life?

Failure, not accomplishing anything 

Window or aisle seat?

window all day everyday, on the wing preferably cause I like to feel the landing gear #pilotsgranddaughter 

What’s your current TV obsession?

Roadies forever, pry that series from my cold dead hands (also Gilmore Girls and Criminal Minds)

Favorite app?

tie between Tumblr and Pinterest (im an aesthetic slut)

Secret talent?

I am bomb at disney princess songs, the girls I babysit for treat me like a jukebox at bedtime, cutest thing ever

Most adventurous thing you’ve done in your life?

delivered a baby has hands down been the coolest thing I’ve ever done

How would you define yourself in three words?

I fucking hate this question. always have. empathetic, resilient, intuitive 

Favourite piece of clothing you own?

overall: my senior prom dress. its emerald green, backless, with a slit to upper thigh chefs kiss 

everyday wear: Colorado sweatshirt

Must have clothing item everyone should have?

I second Jude: over sized hoodies

Superpower you would want?

nonspecific healing powers so they aren't limited to physical ailments

What’s inspiring you in life right now?

Colson

Best piece of advice you’ve received?

HA. probably that the body remembers more about trauma than the mind and your seemingly irrational physical reactions to things are your brain’s attempt to protect you

Best advice you’d give your teenage self?

his mistake does not define your worth. I went for a variant of these boys aint shit don't judge me cause she needs to hear it

A book that everyone should read?

Harry Potter series (yes the whole thing), Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson, Wintergirls by Laurie Halse Anderson, The Giver by Lois Lowry 

What would you like to be remembered for?

empathy, the way I made people feel

How do you define beauty?

FOR THE LAST TIME ITS SUBJECTIVE, things that give you peace, it could be a song, a person, a sunset, a scone, a leaf. If it makes you stop a second and exhale then its beautiful to you

What do you love most about your body?

holy trigger question Batman...my eyes, my hair color, texture, and its ability to grow

Best way to take a rest/decompress?

drive with the windows down and blast music while singing at the top of my lungs

Favorite place to view art?

unexpected places, like street corners, carnivals, just somewhere it takes you off guard and makes you stop and pay attention

If your life were a song, what would the title be?

it’d be one of those crazy long 2000s fall out boy titles for sure, subject matter yet to be determined 

If you could master one instrument, what would it be?

violin hands down, it hits me different

If you had a tattoo, where would it be?

I have a bunch planned, plane on my right shoulder, Kells related between 3rd and 4th ribs (maybe lower in case I ever need a chest tube), watercolor portrait of my dog at some point location TBD

Dolphins or koalas?

dolphins are stoners and they're super smart, but koalas cause they’re grumpy af and honestly same

What’s your spirit animal?

again Jude and I are vibin: I've been identifying with a phoenix as of late. according to pottermore im a greyhound though (yes a patrons is a wizarding spirit animal. fight me)

Best gift you’ve ever received?

seven year old me was stoked to get a functional microscope and metal detector, I was in my egyptology/archeology phase, I still have them lmao

Best gift you’ve ever given?

oh hell idk...I made my cousin cry once cause I made cupcakes for her birthday party, they were cherry limeade flavored and had little straws and everything. that was pretty cool, granted she was seven. I also made my teacher cry cause I made sea salt caramel chocolate cupcakes for her going away party. I guess my baking brings people to tears

What’s your favourite board game?

candy land, battleship, cards against humanity even though there isn't a board

What’s your favourite colour?

forest green atm

Least favourite colour?

bright yellow/orange, its offensive to my general The Dirt Mick Mars disposition

Diamonds or pearls?

pearls (actually opals though)

Drugstore makeup or designer?

not picky provided they are evironmentally friendly. I really like Besame Cosmetics though

Blow-dry or air-dry?

air-dry, I don't have the patience for blow drying

Pilates or yoga?

yoga

Coffee or tea?

COFFEE, im still learning to like tea

What’s the weirdest word in the English language?

holy shit how much time do we have, my favorite weird word to say is fistula or omphalocele (they're medical conditions, don't goole it unless you have a strong stomach) 

Dark chocolate or milk chocolate?

dark chocolate

Stairs or elevator?

stairs 

Summer or winter?

neither FALL BITCHES   winter if I had to pick cause I love Christmas 

You are stuck on an island, you can pick one food to eat forever without getting tired of it, what would you eat?

burgers

A desert you don’t like?

red velvet cake....just why is it a thing that exists 

A skill you’re working on mastering?

baking scones or shit that’s flaky in general 

Best thing to happen to you today?

being tagged to do this twice, I felt special for a hot second (thanks babes)

Best compliment you’ve ever received?

that I would make a good doctor (I handled a scary pt situation like a champ, they didn't know I threw up after I made sure my pt didn't die. puking in a foreign country on the download is a skill in and of itself)

Favorite smell?

bergamot, baking bread, baking spice cakes at Christmas

Hugs or kisses?

HUGS CAN SAVE THE WORLD

If you made a documentary, what would it be about?

gifted kid fall off

Last piece of content you consumed that made you cry?

In These Walls - Machine Gun Kelly

Casual Sabotage - Yungblud

genius assholes...

Lipstick or lip gloss?

lipstick for special occasions but actually tinted chapstick or lip stains 

Sweet or savoury?

savory to eat sweet to make for someone else

Girl crush?

Brittney Furlan Lee, Alexis Bledel, Lauren Graham 

How you know you’re in love?

you look at them and just say yep. them. usually while they're doing something stupid 

Song you can listen to on repeat?

imma out myself but Swing Life Away - Machine Gun Kelly

If you could switch lives with someone for a day who would it be?

the grass is not greener ya’ll. id rather go back and relive days 

What are you most excited about at this time in your life?

hopefully passing my first trimester of chiropractic school. fingers crossed pls

#quarantine games #don't come for me people #if you identify with this stuff hit me up #I can always use more quarantine buddies #love and good vibes to you all

[afewmarvelousthoughts]

From The Heart

Pairing: Bucky X Reader

Summary: It’s your first Valentine’s Day together and Bucky is beyond stressed about how to make it a memorable one.

Warnings: None. Just fluff. 

A/N: While I may not be the biggest Valentine’s Day person I am big on loving those around me and meaningful gestures. SO. Here’s some sweet V-Day fluff from my heart to all of you lovelies. I love you all dearly! 

(Sorry for the double notification tag list pumpkins. I posted this to the wrong place first.)

Bucky gapes, morosely at the endless selection of flowers before him. Daisies, tulips, chrysanthemums, irises, of course, roses. Some bouquets have these odd little plants the shop owner called succulents, others have candy or even small bottles of booze tucked into the foliage. None of them seem right.

His hands feel clammy, heart either lodged in his throat or floating in his stomach from moment to moment. All of which is laughable. He was a soldier, an assassin, had killed more people then he cared to think of… all with a fraction of the anxiety he feels right now. This is what you do to him though.

Every time you laugh he feels like he can’t hear anything else. Your smile makes the whole world fall away. When you touch him… His heart is back in his throat.

It doesn’t help that every shop he’s been in is packed to bursting with people. He’s getting better at being in public. In fact, if you or Steve is with him he almost feels like his old self, or… something close to it. But this was something he told Steve he wanted to do on his own, something for you. It was Valentine’s Day after all, and you were supposed to get your girl flowers on Valentine’s Day. He’s regretting not having him come along.

Someone bumps hard into him in the tight space and he feels his heart rate tick up a little too high. Left hand flexing into a hard fist. He isn’t worried about hurting anyone. He just doesn’t want to go into a panic… hates the disorientation that follows… quickly he presses through the crowd in the shop to the sidewalk. It’s Manhattan, so it’s not like there’s not a bustle of bodies out here too, but at least the air doesn’t smell like impossible decisions.

“Ya know,” Bucky jumps a bit at the sound of Wilson’s voice. “I don’t know that flowers are her thing.”

“Are you following me?” Bucky feels his pride tingle. Did Steve have Sam tag him? Did he not think Bucky could handle this?

“Hell no,” Wilson laughs. “Well… sort of.” He holds up a bouquet in his hand that Bucky hadn’t noticed. Had that been a weapon… he pushes the thought from his head. Wilson is a friend. Friend’s don’t have to be checked for weapons.

“I saw you at that place off 33rd when I was getting these. You seemed… like you were struggling a bit so I thought I’d come by and give you some friendly advice.” The shop on 33rd had been the last shop he’d been at before this one… at least Wilson thought this was only the second shop he’d gone to today.

“I was that obvious huh?” Bucky forces a smile and tugs at his short ponytail.

Wilson grabs his shoulder, “Yeah. But that’s alright man. Happens to the best of us.”

Bucky huffs out a mirthless laugh, “I just… want to get Y/N something nice? I don’t know if 1943 nice is the same as 21st century nice.” Wilson laughs and lays an arm across Bucky’s shoulders, tugging him down the block to a little coffee shop.

Each of them gets a coffee and sits outside their cups sending clouds up into the crisp February air.

“Look, you’re overthinking this.” Wilson takes a long, grateful sip, “You’ve got a damn good woman there, Buck. Chances are she’ll just be happy to spend a night with you that doesn’t end with you both picking gunpowder from under your nails.”

He’s not wrong. Still… “I know. But,” Bucky stares into the swirl of steam from his mug, “I wanna make it special I guess. It’s our first Valentine’s…”

Wilson throws his head back in a good-natured laugh, “Who the hell would have thought you were such a romantic Barnes?!” Bucky sneers and throws a balled up napkin at his friend.

“Dick.”

“Woo,” Wilson dabs his eyes with the napkin, taking a deep breath to swallow his giggles. “Alright, alright. Flowers are nothing special,” Bucky eyes the bouquet on the table. “Hey, these are for someone I’ve known for two weeks man. Not sayin’ she’s not great but what Y/N and you have… that’s on another level.” Bucky feels his heart squeeze a bit.

“Hmm…” Wilson sips his coffee, a pensive look on his face. “Alright. What’s something you used to love doing? Before all the bullshit, before the war, when you were…”

“Normal?” Bucky almost spits the word.

“I was gonna say less of a pain in the ass but sure, normal works,” Wilson gives him a warm smile. “Come on. What was something that made you happy?”

Bucky wasn’t expecting this question and it throws him more than he’d like to admit. He busies himself with his coffee while he sorts through his sometimes fragmented memories. There is one place…

“I liked the Boardwalk… Coney Island.” He stares off into the middle distance as he tries to bring it all into focus, “Steve and I would go a lot, I’d take my sisters or even dates. I’d go by myself too when I wanted to disappear for a little while, just watch the water and write…”

When he comes back to himself Wilson has a soft smile on his face. “Well, there ya go man. Take her there.”

Bucky scoffs, “Isn’t that lame?” He drinks his coffee to stall, “Plus the park is closed, it’s off season in the winter.”

Wilson rolls his eyes, “Dude, you’re a fucking Avenger now. A hundred bucks that in one phone call you could have all access to the park.”

“I’ll take that bet.” Wilson whips out his phone and begins typing, “What’re you doing?”

“Making the easiest $100 of my life, Barnes.”

In less than an hour, Bucky finds himself at an ATM with a self satisfied Wilson at his side pulling out the $100 he owes him.

Wilson smirks as he tucks the twenties into his jeans, “May upgrade this bouquet after that winfall.” He winks. “Seriously man, have fun tonight. Don’t overthink it. You already got the girl.”

“Yeah yeah,” Bucky yells over his shoulder. He did have the girl. But he really wanted to keep her too… Once more the nerves set in.

-

A few hours ago he texted you to wear something warm and casual and be ready by 7pm. 

In the elevator, he tugs at his ponytail trying to get his heart to settle in his chest. Instead of flowers he got two bottles of wine Pepper assured him were good and some things he knows you like. Dark chocolate, good cheese, crackers, some charcuterie. Kind of a picnic… that you’d have in an empty amusement park… in the middle of February… in New York... Damn you Wilson.

The door slides open to your apartment and he breathes in the familiar scent. Really it’s been feeling more like home than his own place for the last few months.

“One second,” you call from the bedroom. “Sorry I would be ready but I was helping Tony with something for Pepper and lost track of time.”

“It’s fine,” he sets the basket down on the coffee table and perches stiffly on the edge of the couch. “We don’t have to rush.” Or… go at all...

“Honestly, you kind of surprised me. Didn’t think you were the Valentine type.”

His foot begins to bounce, “I mean we don’t have to do anything if that’s not your thing.”

“Nah,” you call out, “You peaked my interest with that vague text.” He stares at his hands. “And the... picnic basket?”

His eyes shoot up and take you in. You look simply stunning to him, even though you’re bundled up in an oversized chunky sweater, kneehigh leather boots, skinny jeans, and a large scarf. Really it’s your smile that stops him cold. How in the hell were you with him…?

“You look amazing,” he manages to say despite the storm in his head.

“You always say that,” he stands and pulls you in for a kiss. Your lips are painted with that red lipstick that never comes off and you taste like magic.

“Because it’s always true.” You roll your eyes at him and pull away to lift up the lid on the basket. He swiftly holds it down.

“Come on, you’ll ruin the surprise,” he sounds far more confident than he feels.

“Fine, Romeo. I’ll play along.”

-

Tony had lent him one of his lowerkey sports cars. A matte black Audi, even though he had tried to force the cherry red Corvette on him, insisting it was far more romantic.

He felt relatively together… until you got into Brooklyn. Being back was always weird. It felt like he was always trying to force pieces of two different puzzles together. The Brooklyn he remembered was still there but then again… not. However, when the sight of the lights come into view he’s strangely comforted. Not everything changed.

When he pulls up to the park you squint at him, a smile on your lips. “What are we-”

“What happened to playing along?” You shake your head and let him open your door, something that had been a point of contention between the two of you in the past.

He gets the basket from the trunk and holds his right, gloved hand out to you. Happily you take it and he leads the way.

The boardwalk is quiet even though it’s open, likely due to the biting cold. But the bright lights of the park seem all the brighter in the cold. As he walks toward the entrance you stop.

“Wait, Bucky the park is closed…” You look worried, like he’s about to be disappointed.

He smiles, “Not for us, doll. It’s ours tonight.”

“Seriously?” You’re beaming at him and all his concerns from earlier fall away.

“Yup.”

A park attendant calls out, “Mr. Barnes?”

“That’s me,” Bucky feels strangely warm inside at hearing his name.

“We’re ready for you both whenever.”

“Oh, you better win me a bear, Barnes.” You plant a kiss on his cheek and tug him in the direction of the lights as he laughs.

Once inside music starts. Not music you’d hear now… His music. Smack in the middle of Luna Park and Deno’s a tent has been set up and a full brass band is playing, speakers sending the sound throughout the park. What a Tony Stark thing to do. As over the top as it is Bucky can’t help but feel a little emotional.

“Oh, Bucky,” you look enchanted.

“Come on, I’ve got a bear to win.”

The two of you ride the Cyclone four times, kiss at the top of the Wonder Wheel, have an inordinate amount of fun slamming into one another in the bumper cars, and make it a point to get on every ride at least once. You insist that he has an unfair advantage in the shooting games so you blindfold him with your scarf. He still wins you a bear.

Finally, you insist to know what’s in the basket. You both retrieve it from the band’s tent and he leads you out to the boardwalk. The lights from Luna Park illuminating everything in colors, the sound of the ocean still as soothing to him now as it had been over half a century ago.

He straddles one of the backless benches and motions for you to sit across from him as he pulls everything out. Each item seems to make your smile brighter. He pops a bottle of wine and just hands the whole thing to you shrugging.

“Seemed silly to bring glasses.”

You laugh, “I’m definitely not too classy to drink overpriced wine from the bottle.”

He opens his own and holds it up, “Happy Valentine’s, doll.”

“Happy Valentine’s,” you echo and your bottles tink together.

Odd but enjoyable picnic complete, you both repack the basket and walk down the boardwalk hand in hand, the sound of the band echoing. It’s pretty if not a touch haunting.

“Thank you, Bucky,” you lean your head into his shoulder as you walk. “This was amazing.”

“Really?”

You stop and stare at him, incredulous. “Of course! We had a whole amusement park to ourselves, a picnic, come on this beats flowers and dinner hands down.”

He can’t help but laugh. “Wilson isn’t going to let me live this down.” You raise your brows. “He told me to take you some place that made me happy, that flowers weren’t you… this place always made me happy… and, well you make me happy.” A particularly upbeat song picks up, “The band though…”

“Tony,” you both say in unison laughing.

He sets the basket down and spins you into him. “I love you, Y/N,” he purrs before kissing you breathless.

“I love you too,” you manage once he pulls away.

“May I have this dance,” his hands moving to clasp yours.

“Always, Bucky. Always.”

@mywinterwolf @disagreetoagree @breezy1415 @peachthatdrinkslemonade @wonderlandmind4 @piensa-bonito @buckysstar @for-the-love-of-the-fandom @handplucked @jewelofwinter

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fluff #bucky #bucky barnes #bucky feels #valentines day

[winchesternova-k]

Why/how do you support "Dean" when he has nearly every major trait in which people dislike "John" for? And I genuinely have no aggression towards this question! I just want to get your take on this character.

tbh i rlly hate comparisons between dean and john fvgfvf bc i don’t think it’s fair when their dynamic is one of a victim and abuser but i’ll do my best to answer this fvgfvg idk how articulate i’ll be this bc i do have adhd. ik what i mean and i understand what my point is but whether anyone else will is anyone’s guess fvgfvg

largely in the early seasons dean’s picked up john’s toxic traits as a way of coping w his abusive/neglectful behaviour. in later seasons, dean doesn’t exhibit many of these traits in an unhealthy way, and when he does (which is rare) i usually put it down to the unhealthy coping mechanisms he has (more on that below) or bad writing bc there have been several times when i feel he’s been ooc (his early treatment of jack for example). there’s multiple posts abt these instances in my liveblog tag (“emily liveblogs spn”)

a lot of the issues i have w john stem from the way he puts his vengeance in front of his kids. dean never does that. in the recent seasons, there’s multiple occasions where he actually puts jack in front of his mission. john continually puts his kids in danger, on purpose. the episode w the strega comes to mind. he used his kids as bait and takes his anger out on dean when sam nearly gets killed. he doesn’t even tell them they’re bait. dean is absolutely terrified of sam getting hurt and of disappointing his father. i can’t remember dean ever doing anything like that to anyone let alone jack or ben.

john treats his kids like soldiers and possessions instead of y’know kids. he gives them “orders”. like parents obviously tell their kids what to do but this is whole different level tbh. they blame themselves when things go wrong bc “they didn’t follow orders”. there’s “wow maybe dad knew better and i should listen next time” and then there’s “dad gave me an order and things went wrong bc i ‘disobeyed’. i’m a bad person”. dean and sam experience the latter. on top of that when they disobey john gets rlly angry bc they’re not under his control. this is a classic abuser move and one that my abusers have used on me. dean doesn’t do this w anyone let alone any of the kids he’s been in charge of, including sam.

i mean dean straight up blames himself when they’re used as bait by demons to get to john in one episode. that’s not a reaction that comes from a healthy relationship. jack’s scared sometimes of disappointing his dads (and i think on one occasion of making dean angry), but dean’s v quick to reassure him that even if he’s done smth wrong they still care abt him. john never does that. and like i said, any negative thing resembling john w dean & jack’s dynamic i usually chalk up to bad writing bc parts of it are v inconsistent between eps and dean never acted this way before w ben. and that aside dean has no history of acting like john in those respects any other time.

when sam and dean need help, john doesn’t give it. he just lets them handle it alone, even when they think it could get them hurt, unless it could help w his overall vengeance. whenever someone needs dean’s help, he’s there. i’m rewatching s1 atm (coming straight off the back of not watching any spn for abt idk 3ish yrs, and then starting from last 2 eps of s12 to the most recent ep), and a major difference between dean and john is how they r towards sam. when sam wants to leave, john shouts at him and guilts him into staying and even disowns him. dean is clearly upset and short w him but he tries to be supportive. he doesn’t know what to say and ultimately he’s honest abt how he feels but he doesn’t want to make things hard for sam or hurt him or drive him away like john. he doesn’t want to control sam like john does. he just wants his brother around, but accepts that sam wants things to be different. ultimately i think if sam had gone back to college he would’ve accepted it and gotten used to a more functional relationship. that’s not to say that the winchester brothers relationship is healthy in early seasons bc it’s not. their relationship formed when they were being abused/neglected and dean literally raised sam, and he doesn’t rlly know how to get along w/o sam which is rlly rlly toxic. but it improves over the yrs bc neither of them want to keep living in that unhealthy cycle

w ben, his parenting model w him is completely different to john’s. he tries to keep him out of danger to the point of trying to keep him from knowing the truth until he absolutely has to. when he does the wrong thing by ben (which i’ll admit like john, is usually out of fear) he apologises and tries to make sure he doesn’t do it again. john never does either of these things.

idk if ur talking abt his drinking, etc.? if that’s (partly) what this is abt, they’re unhealthy coping mechanisms that dean has developed bc he doesn’t know how else to deal. he doesn’t do therapy and the influential figures in his life coped this way (bobby, john, etc.) and he would’ve copied it.

mostly i think john doesn’t want to improve. dean does. dean doesn’t want to hurt the ppl he loves and when he does he apologises, even tho it takes a while. that last part is smth i relate to as an abuse survivor, bc abuse makes it hard to admit when ur wrong bc it will be used against u, smth we know for a fact john did w both sam and dean. john is shown to care less abt hurting ppl he cares abt than whatever he’s chasing and i think he apologises like once? in the entire show. i mean dean even knows when he’s being possessed by a demon bc john’s nice to him and tells him he’s proud. sam even says he feels like nothing he ever does is good enough bc of john (smth i also experience due to abuse and neglect). dean’s never afraid to tell jack or ben when he’s proud of them.

john’s happy to hurt whoever he has to to achieve his mission and his revenge, even hurt or kill his kids. he doesn’t WANT to hurt them, but again the strega ep shows that the mission comes first. dean shows how different he is when he refuses to kill jack in the s14 finale. he’s angry and he wants revenge but he knows hurting jack is wrong. dean often goes headfirst into danger to protect others w little thought for his own safety. that’s partially a reaction to john’s treatment of him, but john used to drag his kids into that danger w him. ik sometimes when theyre older john tries to keep them away from it, but that’s when they’re old enough to choose (and he’s still not letting them). but when they were dependent on him, he straight up did not care whether they were in danger or not. not when his mission was at stake. when they’re older and can keep themselves out of danger, that’s when and only when he tries to keep them out of danger. it’s a control thing. john wants them under his thumb and to only do what he wants. jack is usually kept out of the situation unless it’s necessary, and ben was entirely except for one instance where it would’ve been more dangerous to keep him out of it. dean parents jack and ben but he doesn’t try to control them.

ig my main thoughts r that dean’s actions r that of an abuse survivor and developed to survive the situation whereas john’s r that of an abuser. dean’s negative actions usually r only intended to hurt himself whereas john’s r intended to hurt everyone. all up i think their traits seem similar on the surface, but deeper down dean’s v different to john. his negative traits tend to be self destructive rather than just destructive. it’s more ig that dean’s actions r different to john’s? idk if that makes sense fvgfvg but i think that dean treats ppl v differently to john. he tries not to hurt ppl but john doesn’t rlly seem to give a shit if he hurts ppl or not.

tldr; i don’t rlly think dean’s toxic traits are similar to john any further than on a superficial level. any time i’ve seen that (esp in recent seasons) has been a result of bad or inconsistent writing. dean’s also a better dad than john. john shows signs found in abusers and ones i saw in my own abusers; dean doesn’t.

#anti john winchester #dean winchester #sam winchester #spn #supernatural #alex talks #i mean this w zero aggression to but i rlly dk how anyone could compare dean to john in this way but anyway #also if this comes across as agressive i dont mean it to! so long as u dont spew ‘john did nothing wrong’ at me we’re good fvgfvg #im sure theres stuff im forgetting to but #this is so fucking long fvgfvg sorry #john stans dni or get blocked #winc*st shippers dni or get blocked #abuse tw #meta #i think it officially counts now fvgfvg #long post #anonymous #asks #my meta

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #192

“i’d love to give you wings, but babe, you’ve got to grow them.”

Where have you lived throughout your life? The same general area in North Carolina. Do you find your job rewarding? N/A What kind of cake did you have for your last birthday? I'm sure it was red velvet. To you, which is better: English muffins or bagels? I enjoy both, but bagels. Do you paint your nails? No. What’s the last website you signed up for? Good question... maybe a feral dog RP forum I was considering making a character on? Do you check your email everyday? I'm getting into the habit. Have you created any pages on Facebook? Yeah. Is there a subject that you absolutely suck at? Social studies/history, math. What’s your favorite song by Dave Matthews Band? I have no idea who that is. Are there people you have absolutely nothing in common with, but still enjoy talking to? Maybe? Have you ever wandered around drunk with your friend? No. Are you good at holding back your laughter if needed? Nooo, not at all. Have you ever been so unfortunate to suffer from a hangover? No. Have you ever had a panic attack? Plenty. Are you deathly allergic to anything? No. Have you ever had a mouse in your house? Yeah. In our old one, anyway. Do you know anyone who DOESN’T have an ex? Not personally, I think. Is anyone you know really religious? Welcome to the South. Yes. Are your eyebrows naturally thick? I'd say they're average. Has speaking in front of people ever made you sick? No. I haven't spoken in front of an actual audience since my senior project, though. It was hard, but I think I did well. What was the last movie that made you teary-eyed? I'm not sure. Moana may have gotten me a bit teary? But if no, Coco absolutely did. Have you had two friends that absolutely hated each other? I think "hate" is a strong word for it. Has a laptop ever burned your legs? Yes. I legitimately had dark spots on my right leg for a long while. Do you know anyone who has a scar through their eyebrow? Juan. Who was the last person to flip you off? Idk, but I'm sure it was playfully. Anyone’s birthday coming up soon? Miiiine! And my friend Alyssa's. Would you ever wear fake eyelashes? Sure, in rare circumstances. Are you good at following directions? No. I have zer-O sense of direction. Do you have someone that you can just act a fool with and not care? Sara. From where you’re sitting, can you touch a wall? Yeah, behind me. When at a restaurant, do you put your napkin on your lap? Not unless I'm with my grandmother. She's extremely "proper" about things. Do you prefer electric or manual pencil sharpeners? Electric. Are your biceps at all noticeable? No. Have you ever seen a walrus? Are there any at SeaWorld? Otherwise, no. When it comes to dropping food, do you believe in the 10 second rule? HELL NO. I'm a germaphobe with that stuff. If given the opportunity, would you ride on a camel? Sure? Do you believe that cellphones actually do cause cancer? I don't recall the science behind this theory, so idk. When people you know cry, does it make you feel like crying too? Oh yes, especially if it's someone I'm very close to. Particularly, I can't handle Mom, my sisters, or Sara crying. I've never seen Dad cry, but if he ever did, I know I would bawl. Do you tend to jump to conclusions? Was this written as a direct @me??????? Are you good at remembering your friends’ birthdays? NOPE. I only remember... Sara's, Connie's, Caleb's (just because it's on Halloween), Shaylee's, and that's literally it out of friends/acquaintances. Is there something you need to do, that you’re trying to avoid doing? Actually use WiiFit. I'm doing periodic exercises throughout the day, but I need to dedicate more and be able to see my center of balance. Ever pop someone else’s pimple? NONONONONO IT'S SO GROSS TO ME How long does it take you to fall asleep? No less than 15 minutes, I think usually more. Do you crack your neck often? I can't. Did you have a weird dream last night? OH MY GOD YES. I was awkwardly with one of my acquaintances at his house somehow????? and we both seemed very uncomfortable??????? and I think I was high or some shit???????????????? I don't even know this person well enough to like-like him?????????????? Who do you sometimes compare yourself to? My sisters and successful friends. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things? Doing the right things. But I aim for both. In what way are you your own worst enemy? I criticize. The. Hell out of everything I do. What activities make you lose track of time? Video games. When you help someone do you ever think, “What’s in it for me?” Full offense, you're an absolute dick if you do that. Who do you tell your secrets to? Nobody really unless there's reason to, and only ever Sara, Mom, or my therapist. Who do you live with? Mom and the pets. When did/will you graduate? '14 for high school. Idk when I will for college, gotta get there first... When are you moving next? Probably when Sara and I are ready for our own place. When is the last time you took a vitamin? I have to twice a week now, so Thursday, because I have an incredible vitamin D deficiency, and that's probably what's causing my knee problems. Why are you stressed? The everlasting weight loss struggle. Do you need to return anyone’s phone call? No. Where do you keep your birth certificate? It's in a safe. How many books are in your room? Uhhh like three? Then one coloring book. Have you ever been IN a wedding? I was the immensely triggered and ugly bridesmaid at my older sister's. Weddings were a very sensitive thing to me at the time, so while I was so happy for Ashley, I had a very difficult time and cried numerous times. What was the last thing you laughed out loud at? I think during a Mark video? Do you have a nickname? Why? "Britt" for obvious reasons, and Mom's called me "Twinkie" since I was a baby. She gave all her children sweets-based nicknames. Fuck out my face if you think that ain't the cutest damn thing. Have you ever had a bad concert experience? No. When was the last time someone told you that you were beautiful/good-looking? Do people often tell you this? I think the last time was when Sara said I looked really pretty with eyeliner on and I just eeeeeeeeeek. I'm not often told it. Are you missing someone of the opposite sex atm? Not romantically. I'd like to see Girt as a bud; I'm gonna invite him to my birthday dinner to hang out. Hopefully he doesn't have work. Want someone back in your life? Yes. Are you currently sad about anything? Weight. Unbelievable difficulty getting my fucking transcript and inability to find my ACT score so I can go back to school. Are you wearing anything shiny? My lip ring has gems on it, and they shine a bit in the right light. How important is a sense of humor in a significant other? I need it. I don't think I could really enjoy a constantly serious person as a partner. How many followers do you have on Twitter? Idk, don't care to check. I only ever use it to be able to like Mark's shit lmao. Do you sleep with the door open or closed? Open so Roman can go in and out. Have you ever been to the beach? Multiple times. Can you handle blood? Doesn't bother me a bit. Do you pay your bills or do your parents? My parents. I have no source of income to. What’s your best friend’s middle name? Jane. Has any place hired you underage for a job? No. Have you ever barely passed a grade/year in school? In college courses when my mental state was at its worst. Have you ever carried a concealed weapon? No. Have you ever tried to sell something overpriced to someone? No, I don't think so. Do you plan to become very wealthy some day? "Very" is unlikely, but I am dead serious about being at least perfectly financially stable one day. I refuse to live how I have my whole life so far, wondering if rent will be paid each month 'n things like that. Do you remember your first time going to the movies? No. Does eating breakfast make you sick? No. Are you dying to say something to someone right this minute? No. Well, not dying to, but after this whole revelation I had, I really want to apologize to Jason. I wasn't without evil in how I responded to and treated him after the breakup. Book series you enjoyed reading recently? I haven't read a series in years. Do you enjoy lying in the grass during the summer, and just existing? Nooo. Summer sucks and lying in grass is super uncomfortable. Do you have a passport? If so, how many stamps do you have in it? No. Are there any keys on your keyboard that have letters fading away? Not fading, but literally gone from the keyboard because this one is horrible, even after being "fixed" or replaced (idr). No joke, 21 are gone. Sooo I have to smash those buttons for the sensor or whatever to understand I'm pressing them, to the point my fingers, especially right pointer, are mildly callused. Do any of your close friends have children? No close ones, but one I'm hoping to reconnect more with it expecting. What do you plan on having for dinner? Probably a sandwich and nutrition shake to get enough calories to take my medicine and get the intended effect. Do you like Chinese food, or do you find it disgusting? The only things I enjoy now are fried rice and eggrolls, but I used to like sweet and sour chicken and bird on a stick or whatever its proper name is. Have the police ever come knocking on your door looking for someone? Once. Know anybody who works in a tattoo parlor? We're not like, "real" friends, but I know a good number of and get along great with the employees at the parlor I'm a regular customer at. I want to work there so badly. Small, environment I feel at home at, great people. Have you ever played flashlight tag? Don't even know what that is. Could you call yourself a movie buff? Not at all. Have you ever had a piercing get infected? A second hole in one of my earlobes, and the first time I got my tongue done, there was an abscess inside that indicated one was likely to form. Thank God that the rollercoaster of The Tongue Piercing Woes has ended. Do you check your fire alarms when you’re supposed to? Mom does occasionally. Are you a shorts wearing kind of person? NOOOOO MY LEGS ARE NOT OKAY. Plus I chafe. Is your grandparents’ house obsessively tidy? Ohhhh I'm sure. I haven't been to her house since I was a kid, but I remember it being like, pristine. Her rooms at her son's is neat as hell too. About how much can you bench press? I have no clue. Have you ever had your phone die on you in the middle of a conversation? Yeah. Is anybody in your family a carpenter? Not to my knowledge. Are you avoiding someone? No. Do you call your boyfriend “Monkey”? I have a gf, and I have never in the least understood how that's a term of endearment. What’s your favorite primary color? Red. What were you for Halloween? Nothing, ugh. I haaave to dress up this year. Do you have any clothes from Walmart? Yeah. When did you get a Facebook? I have no clue. What color are your eyes? Grayish-greenish blue. What motivates you? How far I've already come, wanting a better future than I have now, encouragement from friends, family, my therapist, and psychiatrist, the drive to thoroughly enjoy my one mortal existence. Can you walk in heels? Not well. When was the last time someone asked you your age? Ummm, last time I got something done at the parlor, I think? Do you keep a journal? No. Have you ever tried a weird flavor of vodka? No. Do you wear a ring on your finger? One, my friendship ring with Sara. What are you doing? This, listening to Asking Alexandria's "Closer" NIN cover (no shame), and waiting for Girt to reply on Facebook. What’s the last kind of soup you ate? A bit of vegetable. Do you currently have a sunburn? No. Who did you last text? Mom. Who’d you last call? About what? My old college to find out why I couldn't get my fucking transcript after weeks upon weeks of being directed to different people about it. I regret going there immensely. Complete waste of time and money. Are you currently frustrated with someone? I'm really frustrated at myself. Do you drink water or soda more often? I'm actually not sure... Do you straighten your hair? No. When did you last talk to your brother or sister? One, not since Christmas, and the younger, a few days ago. All my half-siblings have been forever, and one I've never spoken to. What is your least favorite vegetable? Probably asparagus. Or beans. Outside of family, name 3 people that make you smile/laugh often. Sara, Mark, Shane Dawson. In school, what subjects did you achieve your highest grades in? English or art, idr. Was there a subject that you enjoyed, but weren’t too good at? No. When was the last time something didn’t go to plan? What happened? Being into what's called "vulture culture" now (at least to a certain degree), I searched for quite a while for the bones of the very first opossum I photographed (I have a photography "series" focused on exposing the horror of roadkill to hopefully influence people to be more careful and vigilant), but despite thorough searching, I couldn't find it. Gruesome, but Mom speculated the remains were destroyed by whoever mows the grass there. Do you have any children? If not, at what age do you think you’ll feel ready to be a parent? No, and never. When was the last time you bought a new item of clothing? Describe it. Uhhh. I seriously have no clue. Maybe some underwear months ago. Was your last Facebook friend request from a male or female? Idk who the last person was. Do you have an item of clothing that makes you feel especially beautiful? Describe it. No. Think of the last person that betrayed you. If they said they were sorry, would you forgive them? I can literally almost guarantee Colleen shared our whole goddamn conversation and shit on Facebook after our last talk, as she did the first time too. Too many times our business became everyone's. I'd forgive her, but I refuse to ever be friends again. Nastiest thing you've ever done? I hate talking about this, but okay. When I was deep into my suicidal depression phase, I had a hard time brushing my teeth as needed. Like... I wouldn't for days. I avoided brushing my hair as long as I could too. Anyone who doesn't believe in how deeply depression is capable of chaining you down and making vital things almost impossible, go get fucking educated. Have you ever been in a lighthouse? No. What color is your shower? White. Where do you order your pizza from? Ideally Domino's, but sometimes Little Caesar's. When is the last time you had a serious talk with someone? Yesterday. Do you find that you have a certain meal you eat every time you go to certain restaurants? Oh yes. I rarely try something new. What color is your bike? N/A What word can you not stand to hear people say? The “n” word. What room of your house are you in? My bedroom. What is the temperature in your city right now? Apparently 38 F. When did you last use a post-it-note? No idea. Would you ever want to own your own restaurant? No. Do you have a fan in your bedroom? I have three lmao. My room is unbearable in the summer. Who is the last person that you took a picture with? Sara. When is the last time you were stuck in a fairly long traffic jam? A couple months or so back when there was an accident. Do you have certain friends that you hug every time you see them? All my friends. When was your most recent trip to an aquarium? 2016 visit to the beach. We went to the aquarium there and it absolutely sucked. What do you like in your salads and what dressing do you prefer? Just lettuce (but I can also handle cucumbers) and the Olive Garden dressing. If it has one, do you ever use the notepad function in your phone? Occasionally. Rn I have tattoo ideas written in it. Surprised? How good would you say your memory is? Absolutely horrible, lately worse than ever. I worry about it quite a bit. About how many times during the night do you wake up from your sleep? Once or twice. Are there any air fresheners in your house? What kinds? Not currently on or anything. What’s one thing you’re glad you’ve done recently? Improved on picking up the phone when I don't know the number. Have you ever done something sexual that you regret? Well, I've talked about flirting with my friend's bf as a pre-teen, and it wasn't always innocent, if you count that as "sexual." I regret the hell out of it. Do you like to sit in the sun and tan when it’s hot out? NO. Ever had a person who was obsessed with you so much that it scared you? Yes, Tyler. I wasn't like, terrified, but preeeetty uncomfortable. Can you drive, and if you can, do you like it? I can, but I'm not that great, and I absolutely hate it. Have you ever said anything to the last person you kissed that you regret? Yes. Do you like french fries? Hell yeah. Have you ever eaten so much you puked? No. Do you care about what others think of your physical appearance? People whose opinions I care about. Would you rather go to Greece or France? Probably Greece.

#survey #quiz #questions #random #lyrics: ''get up'' by mother mother

[tarithenurse]

Stolen - 3

Pairing: Loki Laufeyson &/x fem!gifted!reader Content: Angsting, bit of rough handling, threats. Loki being a nasty, creepy shit. Mostly plot and setting though. A/N: <3 Feel free to ask for tagging and always (please) remember that you are welcome to reblog, comment etc. I love feedback and it helps me stay motivated (+ I want to get better at writing). Atm, I will not pick specific update days due to Covid19 work and all it entails.

3. Fundamentally Loathsome

…   Reader  ...

Five days have passed. Or four. Or perhaps it's been a week. To be honest, you don't really know how long it's been because the only hint of time passing is the rise and fall in natural needs. Loki comes with food seemingly twice a day and often he uses the visits to attempt to conjure up conversations – even treated with complete silence, he chats calmly about all sorts of pointless subjects, many of which you don't know anything about. Still, there's one thing he touches upon more than once.

"Who taught you magic?" It doesn't matter that you don't answer, he just smiles his creepy smile before leaving you alone once more.

It has become a routine that slowly is getting to your sanity and deteriorating it bit by bit unless you find a way to entertain yourself. The little room has become your entire world which you have explored every inch off and tried to adapt to suit your needs. Physical exercise? Not something you normally are a fan of...now it’s one of the few things you can do to keep your mind off things. Entertainment is a severe issue even after you accidentally find a function on a panel that opens the window shutters to the endlessness of space – and brought the little hope you’d scrounged together that day crashing down.

You see...there’s something the movies don’t show in the sci-fi adventures: space is exactly what the word implies. Space. Empty space, to be exact. The endless parades of stars and swirling galaxies? Nope. Sure, sometimes there is light out in the distance but it doesn’t bring any sense of comfort to you, just dreadful isolation manifesting itself with renewed power. It’s impossible for you to tell if it’s Loki’s way of messing with you. Perhaps he purposefully sticks to the vacant areas of infinity to get under your skin. After all, who would remain stubborn when the outlook is as dark as this?

Attempting to remind yourself of who you are and where you come from, you do what generations of humans have done before and recount the stories you know or sing the songs you remember.

...  Loki   ...

A muffled melody catches his ears as he walks past the locked door, making him tilt the head in amusement. Too faint to pick out more than a few random words, Loki remains rooted in place until the tune changes together with the hope that the prisoner might be breaking. Time to expedite the process.

If the door had been mounted with hinges then he would have loved to slam it open and startle the mortal, instead he leans against the door frame, grinning as the view slowly is revealed with [Y/N] seated on the desk with the back to him. Her feet, resting on the seat, are tapping along slightly off the beat. The song grows hesitant before it stops all together and her head dips – it’s as if Loki can feel the breath she takes and he imagines his scent filling up her lungs along with it.

“How prettily the caged bird sings.”

Of course, he’s given no answer: the stubborn Midgardian just sits there with the back straight as a rod and shoulders squared. Such fragile shoulders. Oh, she may try to appear tough, but he could crush every bone in her body if so inclined, and as to remind her of this, Loki walks over and slides cold fingers up her arms before coming to rest on the tense muscles.

“No need to stop now, my pet, I will make you sing is I wish,” he promises on a whisper.

Sitting down behind her, the god easily pulls the warm back against his chest and savours the chills obviously racing up the woman’s spine. A lesser man could forget the great scheme of things if he pressed his nose into the hair to inhale the nigh toxic mixture of fear and subtle rebellion against the natural submission.

Whispering into [Y/N]’s ear, he enunciates each word carefully. “I could force you. Hurt you. Have you asked yourself why I haven’t?” Of course she has, he can tell by the way her breathing stills. “Because, you will come to recognize my claim is righteous and so you will do your part of your own free will.”

“Impossible!” Under the breath, she adds, “I don’t even know what it is.”

“Ask and you shall learn.”

The doubt and distrust is rolling off the mortal in waves, clinging to his skin like sweat while she makes up her mind. “Fine! What’ya gonna do? Sell me as a slave?”

“Not right away.” Loki snickers at the chills shaking her body. “We are going to the realm of Alfheim where you will use your magic to heal their beloved priestess thus placing them in debt to me.”

“...and? I mean, now we are dreaming.”

Part of his plan or not, the former Asgardian prince feels like ripping her tongue out for the insolence. Shoving her off the table instead, her chest forced into the squishy seat even as she fights the force of his grip, Loki presses down upon her to squeeze the air from her lungs. The heat. It’s maddening, a sweet burn that penetrates his trousers’ and tunic’s front as if they were skin to skin when he bends over her.

“My dreams, little slave, are your nightmares.” Face millimetres from her ear, he drives the point home with a slow lick along the jawline. “Do not forget your place.” Kneeling. Before me.

She can’t see the grin on his face as he stalks out, leaving her trembling with tears.

#Loki Laufeyson #Loki MCU #loki x reader #Loki x you #loki fanfic #Loki fanfiction #fanfiction series #Loki #Slow burn #enemies to lovers #Loki enemies to lovers #from enemies to lovers #loki angst #loki dark #jotun loki #loki odinson #post-Battle of New York #Alternate timeline #Timeline spawned in Endgame #Loki is a scheming shit #reader #reader insert #fem!reader #gifted!reader #magic #Evil loki #birthright #writing #fanfiction #fanfic

[nostalgiaispeace]

1086.

Where have you lived throughout your life?

mostly VA Beach

Do you find your job rewarding?

yes

What kind of cake did you have for your last birthday?

-

To you, which is better: English muffins or bagels?

bagels

Do you paint your nails?

no

What’s the last website you signed up for?

dropbox.

Do you check your email everyday?

yes

Have you created any pages on Facebook?

yes

Is there a subject that you absolutely suck at?

math

What’s your favourite song by Dave Matthews Band?

-

Are there people you have absolutely nothing in common with, but still enjoy talking to?

maybe?

Have you ever wandered around drunk with your friend?

not that i know of.

Are you good at holding back your laughter if needed?

sure

Have you ever been so unfortunate to suffer from a hangover?

yes

Have you ever had a panic attack?

too many to count.

Are you deathly allergic to anything?

enough to have to carry an epipen

Have you ever had a mouse in your house?

nope

Do you know anyone who DOESN’T have an ex?

not that i can think of.

Is anyone you know really religious?

yes

Are your eyebrows naturally thick?

sure

Has speaking in front of people ever made you sick?

no

What was the last movie that made you teary-eyed?

A Star is Born (I Think)

Have you had two friends that absolutely hated each other?

yes

Has a laptop ever burned your legs?

no. just made them hot

Do you know anyone who has a scar through their eyebrow?

not that i can think of

Who was the last person to flip you off?

idk

Anyone’s birthday coming up soon?

my mom’s

Would you ever wear fake eyelashes?

no

Are you good at following directions?

depends

Do you have someone that you can just act a fool with and not care?

yes

From where you’re sitting, can you touch a wall?

no

When at a restaurant, do you put your napkin on your lap?

if i remember

Do you prefer electric or manual pencil sharpeners?

manual

Are your biceps at all noticeable?

i guess?

Have you ever seen a walrus?

no

When it comes to dropping food, do you believe in the 10 second rule?

no

If given the opportunity, would you ride on a camel?

no

Do you believe that cellphones actually do cause cancer?

idk.

When people you know cry, does it make you feel like crying too?

yes

Do you tend to jump to conclusions?

yes

Are you good at remembering your friends’ birthdays?

yes

Is there something you need to do, that you’re trying to avoid doing?

yes

Ever pop someone else’s pimple?

yes

How long does it take you to fall asleep?

depends on the day

Do you crack your neck often?

no

Did you have a weird dream last night?

can’t remember it.

Who do you sometimes compare yourself to?

no one really.

Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?

both

In what way are you your own worst enemy?

in all the ways

What activities make you lose track of time?

reading

When you help someone do you ever think, “What’s in it for me?”

no

Who do you tell your secrets to?

no one really

Who do you live with?

Matt

When did/will you graduate?

2009

When are you moving next?

idk

When is the last time you took a vitamin?

idk

Why are you stressed?

life

Do you need to return anyone’s phone call?

no

Where do you keep your birth certificate?

idk to be honest.

How many books are in your room?

too many to count.

Have you ever been IN a wedding?

yes

What was the last thing you laughed out loud at?

the SAG awards.

Do you have a nickname? Why?

sure; people give them to me.

Have you ever had a bad concert experience?

Danny wasn’t that great once when I saw them on their last tour before Denis was their singer for a bit.

When was the last time someone told you that you were beautiful/good-looking? Do people often tell you this?

recently i’m sure; Matthew does.

Are you missing someone of the opposite sex atm?

no

Want someone back in your life?

sometimes i do.

Are you currently sad about anything?

no

Are you wearing anything shiny?

no

How important is a sense of humor in a significant other?

pretty important

How many followers do you have on Twitter?

no idea. i don’t pay attention

Do you sleep with the door open or closed?

cracked

Have you ever been to the beach?

yes

Can you handle blood?

yes

Do you pay your bills or do your parents?

i’m grown and married fam.

What’s your best friend’s middle name?

Willow

Has any place hired you underage for a job?

no

Have you ever barely passed a grade/year in school?

probably?

Have you ever carried a concealed weapon?

no

Have you ever tried to sell something overpriced to someone?

no

Do you plan to become very wealthy some day?

idk

Do you remember your first time going to the movies?

no

Does eating breakfast make you sick?

sometimes

Are you dying to say something to someone right this minute?

no

Book series you enjoyed reading recently?

Lizzie Garner series

Do you enjoy lying in the grass during the summer, and just existing?

no. i’m allergic to the grass....

Do you have a passport? If so, how many stamps do you have in it?

no

Are there any keys on your keyboard that have letters fading away?

no

Do any of your close friends have children?

yes

What do you plan on having for dinner?

i had pizza

Do you like Chinese food, or do you find it disgusting?

yes

Have the police ever come knocking on your door looking for someone?

no

Know anybody who works in a tattoo parlor?

yes

Have you ever played flashlight tag?

no

Could you call yourself a movie buff?

yes

Have you ever had a piercing get infected?

yes

Do you check your fire alarms when you’re supposed to?

no

Are you a shorts wearing kind of person?

yes

Is your grandparents’ house obsessively tidy?

yes but like dusty. like i don’t think they ever dusted lol

About how much can you bench press?

lol

Have you ever had your phone die on you in the middle of a conversation?

yeah

Is anybody in your family a carpenter?

idk

Are you avoiding someone?

sure

Do you call your boyfriend “Monkey”?

no

What’s your favorite primary color?

orange

What were you for Halloween?

nothing

Do you have any clothes from Walmart?

yes

When did you get a Facebook?

2008?

What color are your eyes?

brown

What motivates you?

God

Can you walk in heels?

yes

When was the last time someone asked you your age?

idk

Do you keep a journal?

yes

Have you ever tried a weird flavor of vodka?

yes

Do you wear a ring on your finger?

yes

What are you doing?

watching “Many Faces of Jane” (I think it’s called)

What’s the last kind of soup you ate?

idk

Do you currently have a sunburn?

no

Who did you last text?

Amber

Who’d you last call? About what?

i don’t remember

Are you currently frustrated with someone?

yes

Do you drink water or soda more often?

water

Do you straighten your hair?

yes

When did you last talk to your brother or sister?

rn

What is your least favorite vegetable?

all of them

Outside of family, name 3 people that make you smile/laugh often.

Paulina, Sami, Brittney

In school, what subjects did you achieve your highest grades in?

English

Was there a subject that you enjoyed, but weren’t too good at?

no

When was the last time something didn’t go to plan? What happened?

my life.

Do you have any children? If not, at what age do you think you’ll feel ready to be a parent?

no; hopefully next year

When was the last time you bought a new item of clothing?Describe it.

last year; harry potter leggings and a harry potter sports bra

Was your last Facebook friend request from a male or female?

female i think

Do you have an item of clothing that makes you feel especially beautiful? Describe it.

dresses

Think of the last person that betrayed you. If they said they were sorry, would you forgive them?

idk

Nastiest thing you’ve ever done?

idk

What’s one thing you’re glad you’ve done recently?

actually doing the chores i needed to get done.

Have you ever done something sexual that you regret?

no

Ever had a person who was obsessed with you so much that it scared you?

yes

Can you drive, and if you can, do you like it?

yes; no

Have you ever said anything to the last person you kissed that you regret?

probably

Do you like french fries?

yes

Have you ever eaten so much you puked?

yes

Do you care about what others think of your physical appearance?

yes, sadly

Would you rather go to Greece or France?

Greece

#me #survey