#tony being vulnerable with his loved ones and showing how he cares by paying attention to little details

[lightwaslaughter]

im watching all the marvel movies in chronological order and ranking them all (just.. cause) and im very surprised to find that iron man three has become my favourite iron man? when did that happen. where did this overwhelming love for this movie come from. hello

#tony experiencing anxiety and ptsd #tony going into enemy territory as himself instead of ironman #and realizing hes strong and capable without the suit #tony being vulnerable with his loved ones and showing how he cares by paying attention to little details #'its a giant bunny relax about it' #harley keener #just in general #tony accepting that what he has experienced and gone through has actually affected him in a negative way #anyways #iron man #tony stark #standing here tenderly #wait also tony stumbling down the stairs in the ironman suit

[donutloverxo]

Spoiled

Kinktober day 5 - Mirror sex

*gif is not mine*

Note - this is a bit of a rushed job. Because while I like August I didn't want to end the year on him lol. It has to be our husband. Thank you so so much for all the support and love all of you have shown me this past year, it's serves as a great motivation for me. I have a resolution of writing 200k in the next year so hopefully there's a lot more hoeness and happiness this coming year for us all. Love y'all❤

This is the last part and sequel to past self and messed up. Dividers by @whimsicalrogers.

Warnings - 18+ only, Smut (m/f), daddy kink, light anal play, hints to threesomes, jealous Steve, cum play, rough sex, general nastiness.

Pairing - Steve Rogers x reader

Word count - 2k

“I am so tired. I mean time travelling is fun and all but sooo exhausting,” you mumbled into the pillow as you laid face flat on your bed. The soft plush mattress providing some much needed comfort to your sore muscles.

After the snap both you and Steve had moved into a brownstone in Brooklyn, it was much smaller than your quarters in the compound but you never really liked having that much of a distance from him anyway.

Even if you weren’t doing anything, you’d prefer to do nothing with him. Just lounging around on like a couple of couch potatoes.

It was hard for him to not have much to do. With half the world gone and the Avengers broken up he spent most of his days volunteering and leading therapy groups. Telling others to move on, that’s what their loved ones would want for them, while not being able to do so himself. Blaming himself for everything that had happened.

He told you that having all that free time made his mind go to dark places, thinking of his past, of all the lives that he wasn’t able to save. And after years of denying that he needed any, he decided to go to therapy.

They were a tough few years. But everything was fine now. As fine as it could be. His friends were back, you joked about how Bucky and Tony had matching cyborg arms now, he laughed at that but they didn’t. There was still plenty of hostility there, he didn’t exactly expect them to become ‘bffs', as you’d called it, hopefully they’d learn to get along.

He unzipped your boots, pulling them off and massaging your feet, listening to you babble nonsense about all your theories about time travel.

He always called you his sunshine. It was an apt petname for you, you brought light into his life, you were his light at the end of the tunnel. After years of being alone, it was as if he was waiting for you all along.

While you had your share of breakdowns during those five years, lots of fights with him because you wanted to move on and not be stuck in the past. He agreed with you, he didn’t want to be stuck, but he couldn’t help it. He couldn’t give up on those he loved.

You were always there for him. His only solace during those dark times.

He had changed a lot, when he met you he was still the Captain, then he was on the run, living in shady motels and not knowing who the fuck he was.

He became a bit more melancholic after the snap, the whole world did, a lot needier for you and your attention and love. Because he was so grateful you weren’t gone.

If you had... he wouldn’t know what to do with himself.

He knew it annoyed you because even though you loved him, that he didn’t doubt one bit, you also liked your independence. But he’ll always need you way more than you need him.

“Sunshine?” he called for your attention, his hands now moving up to your calves, applying just the little bit of pressure.

You giggled, looking over your shoulder to him as you felt your face heat up, “I swear, Steve, you’re so cheesy.”

“Do you...” he cleared his throat and then shook his head, it was stupid of him to even think something like that much less verbally express it to you.

You turned around, laying flat on your back, “What?”

“It’s silly,” he pressed his lips in a thin line.

“I don’t care, you still have to tell me. Come on,” you lightly kicked your legs which were on his lap.

“Do you ever wish... you were with someone closer to your age.”

He couldn’t look at you, even after all these years of being together he couldn’t be completely vulnerable--a life of rejection making him anticipate the worst.

“Why would you say that?” you sat up, cupping his cheek with your hand.

“I don’t know,” he shrugged.

It wasn’t just that you were younger, almost everyone was younger compared to him, but you had a young soul that would never grow old.

And he... he was no fun sometimes, how long would it take for you to grow tired of him. Did just you like the thrill of being on the run? When he was more edgier and rougher than he is now.

“I could never even imagine being with anyone but you,” you assured him.

He scoffed, “Didn’t seem like that when you were with him.”

“Oh, you mean ‘you'?” you cocked your head to the side, feigning innocence.

You knew how jealous your fawning over his past self’s beard had made him. To be honest, you would lose your shit if he acted that way towards any other woman, even if said woman was a version of you.

He shook his head, “Forget I said anything.”

“Wait,” you cupped his cheek, making him look at you, “You’re so jelly and needy sometimes, daddy.”

He bit the inside of his as you knelt on the floor before him, parting his legs, your hands fumbling with his belt but he stopped you by holding onto your wrists.

“We should get cleaned up...” he half heartedly tried to stop you but you managed to pull all his straps open and take his hardening erection out of his pants.

“We probably should...” you hummed, “But I guess I need to show daddy how much I love him,” peaking out your tongue to circle his leaking tip.

“I know you love me, sweetheart, but I just worry sometimes if I’m too old fashioned for you?” he wondered, letting out a shuddering moan as you took him in your mouth, looking up at him with your wide innocent eyes--always so full of life.

You swallowed around him, moaning at the familiar taste and scent of him, taking him deeper till he hit the back of your throat.

Steve being old fashioned did bother you a little at times. Not the part where he was an absolute gentleman, always holding the door open for you, paying for your dates. But where he always wanted to be the one protecting you. Taking care of you. Which was good, but he needs some loving too.

“Swallow it all, honey,” he instructed as he held your head down, his spend coating the back of your throat as you followed his command like a good girl.

Opening your mouth and holding out your tongue, “I did it, daddy,” you proclaimed proudly.

He prodded at your mouth with his fingers, under your tongue, to make sure that you got all of it, “Good girl,” he smiled as you suckled on his fingers, “you always need to have your mouth stuffed, honey, don’t you?”

You only nodded, letting out a pathetic whine when he pulled his fingers out with a loud pop.

“Let’s go shower, honey,” he said but then frowned when you shook your head.

“Are you done already? That’s it?” Don't say it, don’t... “Got another one in ya?”

You knew you were digging your own grave, of Steve wanted you he could literally fuck you for days, you had tried to ‘test' that on your honeymoon. To see who would give out first, your poor pussy or his unyielding supersoldier stamina.

Obviously he won and you were never able to complete your little experiment.

He gave you a fake sweet smile, dripping with--so much malice which was so not Steve. Gripping your hair he yanked you back to bare your neck to him, his other hand tracing your pulse point before wrapping around your neck, applying the slightest bit of pressure - because you were precious, he’d never want to actually hurt you, “I was going to make love to you in the shower, sweetheart.” he squeezed tighter as you choked, wrapping your tiny hands around his wrist, “But then you had to go and say that. What should we do with you?” he mused.

“Fuck me?” you sassed, while making love sounded nice, you would much rather have a good dicking down.

“No, you have to learn your lesson, honey. I maybe older but it only makes me better. I’ll have to show you I guess,” he tutted.

Hauling you up, with his hands under your arms, he manhandled you till you both stood before the dressing mirror you had gotten a few months ago, pressing your cheek against its cool surface as he worked on the seams of your cat suit.

“I’ve wanted to do this for a long time,” he confessed, ever since you had bought the large mirror, he liked to watch you as he took you apart in it, sometimes making you look, somehow that seemed to suck all your sass and feistiness and you’d just turn into a shy flustered mess in his arms, refusing to look at the mirror or at him.

Which would only fuel his lust, because he still had the ability to surprise you, even after he’d seen all of you. Felt all of your caverns, and you, intimately and knew them like the back of his hand.

“Never really got the opportunity to, now’s good a time as any, wouldn’t you agree?” he nibbled at the shell of your ear, smirking as you weakly nodded.

“You’re so good at doing what you’re told.” He pressed a kiss to your hair, kneeling behind you to rid you of your tight pants before burying his head between your legs.

Nudging your intimate lips apart with the lip of his tongue, “You’re already soaked, honey,” he observed, licking his lips to savor your taste before prodding at your second hole with his tongue, just so he could hear you gasp.

“Steve!” you exclaimed, not expecting that. While Steve was more of an ass man, he never wanted to fuck you or even touch you there. But after a lot of course convincing from your side he had to give in.

He bit the flesh of your buttocks before speaking against it, “Since you like having all your holes stuffed, maybe I should call Bucky to help me out sometime...”

“Really?!” you perked up, looking down at him over your shoulder.

He didn’t give you an answer, instead fucking you with his tongue tillyou were quivering around him, crying out loud, as the mirror fogged up.

“Bucky’s nice...” you mumbled incoherently as he rose to his feet, his nails digging into your hips as he picked you up till you were standing on your top toes to meet his height. Sheathing his hard length inside you in one firm thrusts as he stayed still to let you get used to him.

“Hm. Am I not nice?” you saw him frown behind in his reflection, “I buy you whatever you want. Give you whatever you want, don’t I? Apparently it’s not enough for you. You’re getting too spoiled, I need to start saying no,” he drove each word home with hard thrusts, his tip kissing your cervix, his warm breath brushing the back of your neck.

“NOOO,” you whined, tears streaming down your face at such an outrageous prospect. Steve never said no to you. Not even when you literally asked for a threesome with his past self. “I was saying...” You tried to say but moaned as he pinched your clit, trying to jerk away from him but his firm hold on you made it impossible. “That he’s nice...” you panted, “Slow down, please!”

He hummed to make a show of thinking about it but then fastened his pace, twisting your clit between his fingers as he watched your face in the mirror.

“No.”

“He’s nice.... but he’s not you,” you wailed, clenching around him as your climax washed over you.

He had to hold onto your waist, so you wouldn’t collapse on your shaky leg, he smiled, “That’s very touching, doll.” He said.

“’is the truth.”

“I wouldn’t mind sharing it with Bucky though. He knows you’re mine.” Unlike a certain someone who was dumb enough to think he had any claim on you, “Can you hold for me?” he asked as you nodded.

Planting your hands against the mirror you braced yourself as he fucked you from behind, filling you up to the brim with his warmth.

“Okay then. You wouldn’t find me kicking him out of my bed...” you giggled.

#steve rogers x reader #chris evans x reader #steve x reader #captain america x reader #steve rogers x you #marvel x reader #avengers x reader #chris evans x you #kinktober

[imperialstark]

How did Steve feel the first time he got to hold Tony in his arms without it being a “carrying him away from/during a battle” type situation? Maybe it’s even still platonically, but imagine those giant arms around that compact form and Steve’s heart just going “oh”

anon the implications of this ask are *chef's kiss*

just the pining. the security. the size difference.

just—

The first time Steve holds Tony in his arms, he barely even registers it, too focused on getting a vulnerable Tony out of the way of gunfire.

Tony's begging for Steve to leave him behind, to find the others and get the hell out of there. As if that were possible. Steve's lost a lot in his short life; friends, family, a lover, He'll be damned if he loses another. Instead of saying as much, Steve just laughs, a bit hysterical, and says "In your dreams, Stark. Can't get rid of me that easily."

The second time is purely a coincidence.

Tony had missed lunch and their daily team dinner. Steve knew he shouldn't have been too worried. Tony kept food in his workshop for nights like this when the call of invention is too strong to ignore. It's not enough, though, not to Steve. Tony's a grown man; he can take care of himself. That doesn't stop Steve from wanting to do it for him, to pick up where Tony slacks like a...friend should. He supposes that they're friends now. He has his own personal entry code to Tony's workshop, which he uses whenever he wants, it seems. Tony never turns him away, anyway.

Steve punches in said code with his knuckles, his other hand too busy balancing a plate of spaghetti. He makes himself known, knocking on the door frame, and walks in, his footsteps purposefully loud. Tony hates when people sneak up on him.

He doesn't know what to expect as Tony's workshop comes into view. Every time Steve enters, it's like he's seeing it for the first time, power tools and inventions in their infancy strewn about like a child just got done playing with his toys. There's nothing cold about Tony's workshop. If anything, it's filled with life. He stops to say hi to DUM-E and U, who roll up to him, waving their arms in what he assumes is excitement. DUM-E grabs him by the sleeve, rolling in the direction of Tony's main work table.

"I'm coming, I'm coming," he chuckles. When he sees Tony slumped over, his blood runs cold, and Steve nearly drops the plate he had brought down for Tony. His first instinct is poison, but how? Who could have slipped in and out of Tony's workshop unnoticed? Bullet then? Was he stabbed? Why wasn't Tony moving—

Tony let out a snore, turning his head in his sleep to get more comfortable. Steve mentally breathes a sigh of relief. He's only a little embarrassed. The only ones who saw his freak out were the bots and JARVIS, and they'd never tell anyone. They like Steve too much. Maybe it was a little silly of him to panic, but being friends with Tony Stark meant heart attacks on the daily. The man's lack of self-preservation was truly astounding. Not that Steve had room to talk.

He debates waking Tony up but decides against it. Tony barely gets enough sleep as is, and Steve's not about to stop him. He sets the plate of spaghetti down on Tony's table, where he'll be able to see it when he wakes up. There, he's done his duty as captain of their little team, and the others are probably wondering what's taking him so long. But as he turns to leave, he finds that he can't. Not while Tony's using a wrench as a pillow, sitting on a stool with absolutely no back support. He makes his mind when Tony snores again.

It's nothing for Steve to pick Tony up, who only shifts in Steve's grasp before settling. Steve lays him down face up on the navy blue sofa he called home whenever he came down to visit Tony. Tony stops snoring now that he's sleeping like a normal human being, and the knot of tension in Steve's chest loosens just a little. The next morning, Tony stumbles down to join the other Avengers for breakfast. He looks like he got a full night's rest, his hair flying every which way, the bags under his eyes a little less defined. Steve makes fun of his snoring, and Tony vehemently denies it.

"Lies," Tony sputters, a flush pinking his cheeks. "Nothing but lies fall from your mouth, Rogers."

Steve is only a little in love with him. In a friendly way. He's screwed.

The third time he holds Tony has to be a conspiracy.

It's movie night because they have those now, and their little group is bigger than normal. Pepper, Rhodey, and Sam have all made an appearance. Pepper and Rhodey were at the tower for Stark Industries business and stayed around longer than necessary to check in on Tony, much to his visible delight. Sam had come to visit Steve (and check out the tower. Steve was sure any day now, Sam would accept their offer and officially join the team) and had a few more days before it was time for him to go back to D.C.

Natasha and Clint had bullied Tony into letting them host movie night in Tony's penthouse, and they had held them there ever since. The downside to that was there was only so much seating available. At first, there had only been a sofa, more for aesthetics than comfort, but with the advent of their movie nights, Tony had swapped the sofa out for something a little softer and an armchair and loveseat to match. Enough to fit six people, not nine.

Sam and Rhodey claim seats next to each other on the sofa, Pepper and Nat sitting on the opposite end. Steve's sitting in his usual armchair that may or may not have his name stitched on it because Tony thinks he's a comedian. Thor and Bruce take up their usual spot at the loveseat, Thor's arm slung around Bruce's shoulders. Clint sits at the foot of the sofa, Natasha's hand carding through his hair absentmindedly as she says something to Pepper that has her laughing.

Tony's the last to arrive like always, holding his own bowl of popcorn because he's the only one who prefers caramel corn over kettle corn like a heathen. His eyes go wide as he surveys the room, sees that there are no seats open.

Natasha opens her mouth first, and Steve just about dies when she says, "I'm sure Steve can make some room. Right, Steve?" Her smile is saccharine, and yet Steve still feels like she's threatening his life.

He doesn't want to protest and demand that Tony sit on the floor like Clint because one, that would hurt Tony's feelings, and that's the last thing he wants to do. And two...he kind of wants Tony to sit with him. Even if the thought on Tony's thighs touching his makes him want to scream. In a good way, though.

Steve just nods, not trusting his voice, and Tony makes his way over and sits down stiffly next to Steve. It's a tight fit. Tony's thigh presses right against his own. Steve can feel the heat of Tony's skin through his pants. JARVIS dims the lights and starts one of the movies on Natasha's list of Necessary Pop Culture she had created for Thor and Steve. Tonight, it's Legally Blonde, with Elle Woods in all of her pink glory, gracing their screen.

Had it not been for the serum, he's sure he wouldn't have been able to pay attention to the movie (which he's enjoying so far, Elle's likable and relatable; Steve knows all too well what it's like to be judged based off his appearance) and the feeling of Tony's body pressed against his own. He's hyper-aware of Tony's presence. His heart rate accelerates every time Steve shifts to get more comfortable, his thigh rubbing against Tony's. He can smell the remnants of Tony's cologne, something bright and uplifting just like its wearer.

About halfway through the movie, he grows tired of Tony's unending stiffness. He just wants Tony to be comfortable. He says so, leaning close to Tony to whisper in his ear. "I'm not gonna bite."

Tony shivers, and Steve wants to hit himself. So much for not making Tony comfortable. But then, Tony does the unthinkable. He takes a deep breath and slowly sinks into Steve's side. Steve freezes like a deer staring up the barrel of a shotgun.

"Oh, God," Tony whispers. "I'm sorry I can move—"

"No!" Steve whisper-yells, his hands wrapping around Tony and—

Tony's sitting sideways on Steve's lap, his legs draped over the armrest. Steve's arms are wrapped around Tony's waist like a seatbelt. Tony's not screaming, which is a good sign in Steve's eyes. Even without enhanced senses, he's sure Tony can hear how loud his heart is beating in his chest.

"Is this fine?" Steve asks when Tony shows no signs of moving.

"Yeah. You're good," Tony says and finally relaxes in Steve's grasp.

And it feels good. Too good. It's cheesy, but it's almost like Tony was made to fit into Steve's arms, his head slotting into place underneath Steve's chin. Tony's hair is soft, softer than he thought, against Steve's neck.

It doesn't hit Steve until later that Natasha probably organized the whole thing from the start.

He'll thank her later. Right now, he's got his hands full, and he's in no rush to let go.

#or tl;dr steve likes holding things and tony fortunately likes being held #stony hours™️ #stony #stevetony #steve rogers #tony stark #marvel #mcu #gabi talks #i wrote this in like two hours am i okay

[loving-all-for-loki]

Voiecless Love Chapter 8: Hard Day’s Night

(Bucky’s Route)

Bucky x reader

Word count: 2162

Warnings: fluff, maybe a little heat (if you know what I mean), some angst

Tag List: @caffeineoverloadandstudying @zizzlekwum @magicalpieex @buckylokisimp @lokiyoulittle @daddysfavoritesexkitten 

A/N: Welcome to Bucky’s route!!! We’re here!!! YAY!!!!

Two weeks go by since you joined the team for the game night and you’ve been with the Avengers ever since. One day you popped by the training room and joined Steve, wanting him to help you get stronger. The two of you spar for about two hours and you see yourself progressing as a useful member of the team. You even get closer with Steve and start writing on his arm as well. He often asks you if you want to join him in jogs in the morning, but that’s the one thing you turn down. No one can pay you to do that.

As far as Bucky, the two of you spend more time together. You find yourself in his room again reading your books as he watches TV, cuddling until you both fall asleep in each other's arms, like tonight. The two of you relax before you go to bed by reading and watching TV. 

“I think I finally understand this show,” Bucky says. 

You look up to see Jeopardy on the screen and smile, then look back at Bucky who’s staring with a big grin.

“It’s all references and they have to guess, but in question form.”

You nod your head which Bucky chuckles at.

“It’s such a simple concept, but it took so long to register.”

You laugh at his comment which throws him by surprise.

“You laughed,” he states.

Sometimes you forget Bucky isn’t Loki and doesn’t hear you often. The only time anyone but Loki has heard you speak was when you freaked out after he had left for Asgard. You still think about him, knowing you were in love but accepting after two months that you may not see him again. Thor hasn’t said a word about getting him back, not to your surprise. Although Loki was the god of lies, Thor has his own share. 

Bucky is still new to you making sound. He longs for your voice again, remembering how beautiful it was when he heard you the first time despite the circumstances. Even the other teammates want to hear you speak because they know when you do it will be important. Tony laughs how you won’t speak again until Bucky means that much to you as well, which some doubt will ever happen. 

“I’m glad you’re getting more comfortable with me.”

Of course, you write to him, you’ve shown me you felt bad for some past mistakes and have helped me ‘move on’ from Loki. I may not have talked to you much when he and I were together, but you still mean a lot to me.

Bucky looks at the paragraph on his arm and tries to ignore the ‘when he and I were together’ part. You two had never labelled yourself, but the idea of losing you to the manipulative god was a fear of his which is now starting to go away. He shakes off his thought and returns his attention back to you, who he kisses on the head.

You go back to your book and ignore Bucky yelling out answers in hysterical joy. He’s so cute the way he still understands modern things. Two days ago, you had to show him how to download music on his phone, which he also just learned how to use to take photos. He’s taken so many since you’ve shown him, mainly of you. His favorite photo is one where he was lifting you up on his feet, holding your hands while laughing. 

“Y/N, can we talk about something?”

What? “I really like you and I’m sure you know that. I’m not exactly subtle, but I need to know how you feel about me.”

I like you, too, Buck.

“No, I mean,” he sighs, looking off in the window to your left, “I need to know exactly how you feel.”

Okay, I’ll be honest. I like you, but I’m not completely comfortable around you. I can spend time around you and trust you if I need help, but I’m scared to open up because I know how you feel about me. I’m scared to ask for help, even if you will. You think I’m small and innocent because I don’t speak. I’m not. 

“I’m sorry I said that, but I really don’t feel that way about you.”

Then explain every time you take over for me when I do things or how if I get hurt, even if it’s just a papercut, you insist I ‘get help’. I don’t ask for it. I don’t need it.

“I worry about you.”

That’s an issue, too. You need to stop worrying so much. You act like a crazy hound and you can’t focus on anything. You’re addicted to me and it’s exhausting.

Bucky knows it’s all true, but to hear it from you and not Steve is different. There’s a bit of pain to the words. They reside with him more and mean more coming from you. If you’ve noticed the way he is with you, then who hasn’t? And who doesn't have a problem with it besides him? “I’m sorry for treating you like that. It’s unfair.”

I understand you like me and you’re trying to take care of me, but it’s a lot. Sometimes, I need a break from it, not specifically from you, but from your guardian-ness.

“I’ll try to back off, I promise.”

Thank you. Also, please don’t get all weird when I talk about Loki or when you see things of him and I. It makes me uncomfortable.

“What do you mean? I’m fine with you talking about him.”

No, you’re not. You get all angry inside and you speak in short sentences. Let me miss him.

“I will.”

There’s an awkward silence between you two. Bucky has muted the TV due to ads and you’re still reading your book. He contemplates what you said. There’s no doubt in anyone’s mind that you’re not going to get over Loki. He was a huge part of your life here and still to this day, the only person you’ve truly talked to you. You trusted him. They didn’t expect you two to get close and that was their mistake. Tony should have jailed him right away, sending him away for him to not have met you. It would have saved you from so much heartbreak.

But Bucky wants to save you now. He can’t help but dwell on you talking about his protectiveness towards you, knowing it bothers you. If anything were to happen to you, he wouldn’t be able to forgive himself, but he doesn’t want to drown you in his presence. You snuggle deeper into the silent soldier, distracting him from his thoughts.

He looks down at you and ponders. You’re so small compared to his large frame, so vulnerable. Anybody with ill intent could snap you like a twig, even with all the training you’ve been doing. Sure, he can see the muscle coming through, but you’re in your own world all the time. You ignore people so easily, what if someone were to sneak up? What if he weren’t there to watch over you?

Your yawn disintegrates any thoughts still lingering in his mind. Setting the book on the nightstand, you grab the blankets and attempt to fall asleep with your back to Bucky. He gets out of bed for a moment to turn off the light then returns to your side. The bed dips as he lays down with his arm under your head. He wraps his other arm around your waist and pulls you close to him, his body pressing against you. 

He takes in a deep breath, reminding himself you’re beside him and okay, but he still wants to keep you closer. He wants to get rid of everything bad in your life, including your heartbreak from the absence of the trickster god. 

Just as Bucky closes his eyes to sleep, he hears sniffing. Your body shakes in front of him. It’s not that cold in the room, so Bucky gives you more blankets in case you’re catching some kind of cold until he hears the sniffing again. He leans up on his elbow and looks over your shoulder. There are dark stains on the sheet under you like it soaked up water, then Bucky notices the tears falling down your face. He feels stupid for thinking you were cold.

Bucky grabs your waist and pulls you into him, including turning you around to being on your stomach. You grab the collar of his t-shirt and bury yourself in him. The pain doesn’t go away. It develops inside your stomach, no longer in your heart. Loki has affected every part of you and you can’t let go. Bucky holds you tight and it doesn’t go unnoticed. Even in your heartbreak, Bucky is still there for you. He’s shown jealousy and anger towards Loki before and seeing how kind and gentle he is when you miss him is shocking. He doesn’t like it when you talk about him casually, but when it comes to you missing him, he doesn’t skip a heart beat to be by your side.

You look at Bucky. He meets your eyes with some kind of pity in them.  His beard is slightly growing in from the last few days, his hair getting long as well. For some reason, it’s just now hitting you how handsome he is. You rub your hands up and down his jaw and diverging your eyes from his.

“You’re so beautiful,” he says.

His words catch your attention again, bringing you out of whatever fantasy is playing in your head. You smile at him and he returns it. He doesn’t smile often, especially in the last few months when Loki came around. It’s so nice to see him happy, even if it’s a short second.

“Thank you.”

Bucky’s smile is even wider now. There’s a sparkle in his eyes as he gets you, adjusting you to sit on his lap in bed, the blankets over your shoulder. He wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you closer to him, and setting his chin on your shoulder.

“You spoke.”

You nod your head. “No, no, speak again please. Why? Why now?”

“Because you make me feel safe.”

“I’m glad,” he smiles. Bucky hugs you even tighter before baking up and looking at you. 

You keep your hands on his jaw as the two of you chuckle. Bucky can feel his heart skip a beat. He thought he was lucky to hear you laugh earlier while reading, but to hear you speak again is a blessing. 

“Your voice is beautiful.”

You blush hard at his words. Not many people compliment you in that way, even Loki, the silver tongue had different words for you. He didn’t acknowledge you speaking when you did and a part of you loved that. You didn’t feel weird or different because of that, but Bucky complimenting you didn’t bother you. There was a part of you that wanted him to compliment you again, but you don’t say anything, not wanting to seem like a brat.

“Never stop speaking, please. For me,” He begs.

“No promises, but I’ll try.”

Bucky smiles at your words again, pulling you close to him. He falls backwards on the bed, pulling you with him so you’re straddling him. Your hair falls down around you two, making a little shield around your heads. A good two minutes pass by as you admire one another, smiling and giggling like fools. Without thinking, Bucky leans up and kisses you. As he leans down, you can see the fear in his eyes as if he’s hoping you don’t get mad at him. You lean down and kiss him back, gently and encouraging. He grabs your waist tightly and rocks you back and forth, creating friction between your two bodies. His lips are soft and inviting. They’re a poison you can see yourself getting drunk on and dying from. His metal arm is cold, sending shivers as he holds you, and contrasting from the heat between your two bodies. For a moment, you slow down and look at him. He looks at you with wonder and his lips slightly part, almost hurt by the sudden seize. 

“I love you,” he whispers, barely loud enough for you to hear. 

You lean down and take his lips again in a passionate kiss. He flips you over so he’s hovering over you on the side. “As much as I’d love to continue this, doll, I’m very tired.”

You chuckle at Bucky’s words as he yawns, further proving his point. He leans back and pulls you into his side, keeping his metal arm around your waist as you tuck your arms in and lean your head on his chest. Kissing your forehead, Bucky closes his eyes and drifts off to sleep, feeling better about the day after your conversations. Your voice blesses his dreams.

#bucky #bucky x reader #bucky barnes #bucy barnes x reader #marvel x reader #bucky fluff #bucky seris

[auroracalisto]

ｍａｓｔｅｒｌｉｓｔ

started: 24 june 2020 last updated: 29 october 2020 see what I will write for here want to submit a request?  do it here (:

THIS MASTERLIST WILL NOT BE UPDATED AS OF 18 NOVEMBER 2020.  FIND MY NEW MASTERLIST HERE!

☼ BIRDS OF PREY ☼

roman sionis

Roman’s Girl┆first chapter of multiple┆Roman Sionis gets what he wants. And when he sets his eyes on you, a girl ten or more years his junior, he’ll get you. Lucky for him, despite your shy and flustered nature, you want him just as much as he wants you.

married life┆short┆the two were always at it—now, the reader was in the middle of it. harley doesn’t care for roman, but she wouldn’t dare hurt you. hell, she would kidnap you—and that’s how you ended up here.

hormones and clubs┆one-shot┆the reader is pregnant and begs roman for a chance to go to his club before she goes into labor.  it doesn’t exactly go how she’d like it to go.  

☼ CRIMINAL MINDS ☼

emily prentiss

i love you┆short┆based on the quote “do you still love me?”

my everything┆requested┆by @millipop18​: Hi! I love what you write! Could I request a emily prentiss x reader where she comforts the reader who’s struggling with depression? Have a nice day, much love xxx

spencer reid

not alone, never alone┆requested┆ by @amy-de-l-abc​.  The request was quite long, but the jist of it was having a suicidal reader, but one who isn’t quite able to do anything.  She and Reid start out as friends but the ending will have them getting together.  Fluff on Reid’s part, as he comforts her when she is feeling down.  Reader also feels like she can’t depend on her therapist or her family, and unfortunately, not even a suicide hotline will help (in a very negative way, which is purely for this story’s purpose).  

empty hearts┆short┆in which the reader tries to get spencer to talk to them, but he’s just not listening. 

useless goodbye┆short┆the reader dies right in front of spencer. 

moon and back┆requested┆by @petrichor-ds.  “i loved you to the moon and back, you know.” for spencer when he’s comforting his SO who has been ~going through it~ w depression ??

jack-o’-lantern┆short┆where you carve pumpkins with spencer and he tells you how carving pumpkins became a thing.

derek morgan

something extra┆one-shot┆where you’ve been married to morgan and now you’re expecting your second child (with a little extra surprise).  the team decides to throw you a baby shower.

baby kicks┆requested┆by anon.  hiii, don’t know if ur taking requests rn. but if you are, i would love if you could do an imagine with derek morgan, where the reader is in her 7 or 8th month of pregnancy. and the team is out on the field and the baby kicks and everyone gets so excited, but especially morgan because that’s literally his baby? 

☼ GOTHAM ☼

victor zsasz

forever until the end┆first chapter of multiple┆the reader is falcone’s long lost daughter whose mother fled to washington after an argument got out of hand. she was raised in an abused home where if she even mentioned her unknown father, she would be hurt. a couple of months after turning twenty-one, she’s beaten to the point she packs her things in the middle of the night and leaves. she does everything she can to get to gotham, even going as far as stealing a car. in gotham, she, fortunately, meets her father, along with a man named victor zsasz who was given the assignment of keeping the reader safe while she gets used to the city. zsasz has never dreaded a job more, but he ends up surprising even himself when he begins to like the reader.

imagines:

you being done with victor’s shit.

☼ HAIKYUU!! ☼

sugawara koshi

grey┆one-shot┆you had always wondered why the stripe of color on your wrist was grey. moving to a new school in the miyagi prefecture, you find out exactly why.

rest of my life┆short┆what sugawara would say if you ever asked him if you could spend the rest of your life with him.

tsukishima kei

it’s you┆one-shot┆after watching Avengers: Endgame, you meet your soulmate for the first time.

ukai keishin

Unanticipated┆one-shot┆the reader is an English teacher at Karasuno, who lived in the United States for much of her life. Never did she think she would meet her soulmate; at the age of twenty-four, she had yet to find them. Yet, one day, after a day of teaching, her friend Takeda asked her if she would come to the boy’s volleyball club meeting. She did. To her surprise, she remembered how much she loved volleyball and actually found her soulmate in that very gym.

aone takanobu

jackets┆short┆where aone points out that you have something on your shirt and he gives you his jacket.  

preferences 

how you meet includes hinata, kuroo, oikawa, tsukishima, sugawara, and ukai

☼ HARRY POTTER ☼

draco malfoy

sick┆one-shot┆where draco comes to join you in the common room, coughing his head off. 

☼ HETALIA ☼

russia

birthday surprise┆one-shot┆no one seemed to like Ivan.  except for you and the children where you worked.  with his birthday going unnoticed by your coworkers, you decided to call Natalia up and make it possible for them to celebrate, only asking for friendship in return. 

2p! nyo! america

pissy proposal┆one-shot┆Emily’s worried that you’re going to leave her.  You make sure she knows that she’s the only one for you.  

2p! russia

scared┆short┆our dear reader is pregnant.  and she’s really nervous about telling viktor.

america

cute neighbor┆short┆alfred ran out in just his underwear after the fire alarm went off.  you luckily had a blanket to spare.  

☼ LUCIFER ☼

lucifer morningstar

willpower┆one-shot┆lucifer really doesn’t understand your motives.  he tries to figure it out.  platonic lucifer x reader. 

necessary goodbye┆one-shot┆where the reader loves lucifer, but he’s in love with detective decker.

necessary realization┆requested┆pt. two of necessary goodbye, where the reader is engaged and she brings lucifer her wedding invitation.  after she leaves to return to her hotel room for that weekend, he comes after her. 

imagines:

lucifer preparing to show you his true face.

marcus pierce/cain

poisoned words┆one-shot┆where the reader is in love with pierce and they go undercover together.  reader is poisoned and she goes to the hospital.  after coming back, she tries to talk to pierce about how she feels.  he shoots her down.  i promise, there is a somewhat fluffy end to this.

uncanny resemblance┆requested┆you like the lieutenant.  you cannot figure him out.  it leads to a home invasion and your uncanny resemblance to a string of victims for anything to happen between the two of you.

amenadiel

lost and found┆one-shot┆the reader’s child, leo, gets lost and goes to the police department.  amenadiel and lucifer are there and leo goes straight to amenadiel.  

ella lopez

nerd basket┆requested┆being ella’s significant other is always filled with geeky questions and gifts.  for your anniversary, she has more questions than you anticipated for your early anniversary gift.  

☼ SUPERNATURAL ☼

crowley

fading┆one-shot┆The reader doesn’t know what to do with their self after Crowley dies, right in front of them.  There’s nothing that they can do except grieve.  

sam winchester

imagines

you hate when Sam says, “All Hallow’s Eve.”

☼ THE AVENGERS ☼

steve rogers

101┆first chapter of three┆steve finally meets his soulmate at the ripe age of 101.  his soulmate is 24 and good friends with peter parker. 

tony stark

shut up, stark.┆short┆tony stark is arguably the reader’s best friend, despite the constant jokes.  he would give anything to help the reader with their constant anxiety. 

stephen strange

birthday plans┆short┆It’s Stephen’s birthday.  Tony called and said he was having a cookout.  But you need to make sure Stephen and your little girl, Rosa, are ready for the event itself.

peter parker

liability┆one-shot┆somehow, the reader is in a predicament that only Spider-man can save them from.  But just a couple seconds of Peter not paying attention literally cost them their life.  

stalker┆short┆where the reader is being followed and peter comes to the rescue.  

imagines

peter loves halloween and among us, a little too much.

natasha romanov

cute┆short┆about natasha calling you cute.

loki laufeyson

a little crush┆short┆in where loki is suuuper vulnerable.  fluffy. 

imagines

loki doesn’t like midgard holidays. 

bucky barnes

cynophobia┆short┆where you’re afraid of dogs and it takes bucky to save you from one trapped in your apartment.  

☼ THE LORD OF THE RINGS ☼

samwise gamgee

conceal, don’t feel┆short┆in which samwise doesn’t return your feelings.

☼ THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY ☼

diego hargreeves

replaceable┆one-shot┆in which diego loves lila, you love diego, and you witness the death of your best friend, elliot.  

klaus hargreeves

back to the future┆short┆in which you are in love with klaus.  he returns the feelings, but unfortunately for you, he does not want you coming to 2019 with him and his siblings.  

allison hargreeves

imagines

cuddling with allison.

☼ THE VAMPIRE DIARIES ☼

series:

for the love of you┆the reader is summoned by bonnie, on accident, to the world of the mikaelsons.  as confused as she is, she comes to realize that not only has she found her soulmate, she’s found four soulmates.  PART ONE PART TWO┆more coming soon

elijah mikaelson

The Soulmate Principle┆one-shot┆Dear Prince Elijah should have just left you alone. But with the Soulmate Principle, he just couldn’t help himself. And it just so happened to cost you your life.

hugs and kisses┆requested┆Hello! Can I request an Elijah x reader one shot; just fluff with lots of kisses and cuddles? Btw, love your blog ^^ — Anon

could you be?┆one-shot┆It’s been on Elijah’s mind for some time.  Would you feel the same way?  Would you want him for the rest of your life?  

ocean’s beauty┆one-shot┆Klaus, of course, the traveller he is, decides to take everyone along with him.  You’re a human and you’re married to Elijah.  Oh, and your ship’s hit an iceberg in the middle of the Atlantic—and it’s sinking quickly. 

kiss of life┆one-shot┆polyamorous reader in a relationship with elijah, klaus, and kol has died.  however, she comes back in a revenge plot by a witch who lost her wife due to klaus.  

injury┆short┆where you are injured and elijah takes care of you.  

glitter┆short┆based off of the song glitter, by patrick droney.  the reader is dead, but not entirely gone.  elijah doesn’t know this.

choose me┆one-shot┆elijah has been a bad boyfriend, in the sense that he’s always gone and never takes into consideration how that makes you feel.   

surprise parties┆requested┆Hii! If the bingo requests are still open can you do a one shot of elijah x reader with the birthday prompt it can be like rebekah throwing a birthday party for the reader or just like elijah fluff, up to you <33 — anon

she will be loved┆requested┆Hi! Can I please request an (platonic) Elijah x 3-4 year old fem!child oneshot where when Elijah went to Mystic Falls (when he needed Elena) and when he’s walking, he hears crying and finds her alone on the streets. I’m sure his heart would absolutely break at the sight and he would do anything he can to help calm her down. He obviously wouldn’t leave her on the streets, deciding right then and there that he wants to adopt her, so he brings her home with him. Omggg he would be such a soft (and veryyy protective) dad and all of the Mikaelsons (once they were undaggered) would love her so much 🤧  (Also Elijah would absolutely lose it if the Mystic Falls gang ever brought Y/n into any of the drama) — @kpopgirlbtssvt

a welcome arrangement┆requested┆Hi! If requests are open, could I request an Elijah x Reader where the reader is a vampire and long time friend to the Mikaelson's, and Rebekah and the others try to set her up with Elijah because they know they both like each other? I love your writing!! 💕 — anon

imagines

you adopt a child with Elijah.

klaus mikaelson 

you’re safe now┆one-shot┆the reader leaves the mystic grill with the intent of going home. instead, something distracts her and she’s attacked. her soulmate is the one who saves her life. crazily enough, it’s the same guy who she was staring at just moments earlier.

pretend boyfriend┆short┆ reader is being watched by some creepy guy at the mystic grill. she asks dear klaus to pretend to be her boyfriend.

which disney princess are you?┆short┆Klaus walks in on you taking a Which Disney Princess Are You? quiz on Buzzfeed.  Color him intrigued.  

heather┆short┆in where the reader is in love with klaus, but he loves heather.

endearment┆short┆klaus is in love with you.  but he doesn’t know if you return the feelings. 

kiss of life┆one-shot┆polyamorous reader in a relationship with klaus, elijah, and kol has died.  however, she comes back in a revenge plot by a witch who lost her wife due to klaus.  

forgotten lifetimes┆one-shot┆reader has dementia and has forgotten her children on multiple occasions.  now, she’s forgetting klaus.  

writer’s block┆short┆where the reader is suffering from writer’s block and klaus comforts the reader so they don’t get upset because of it.

silent treatment┆requested┆hi, can you please write an imagine with klaus mikaelson? his gf calls him by one of her close friend’s name (that he don’t like bc he’s possessive like that) and he gives her the silent treatment — anon

one night stands, and then some┆requested┆hi! i just wanted to say that i love your blog! i have a request, for a klaus mikaelson drabble/imagine. where the reade had a one night stand with him (instead of hayley) and now she’s pregnant. whatever else you want to do with that! thank you! ❤️  — @mikaelson-emma

a bolt from the blue┆one-shot┆the reader has recently moved from colorado and finds one of her first cases on the job to be a dead doctor, invited to a ball held by the mikaelsons.  she goes, expecting to find the killer, but instead, she finds that two of the mikaelsons have fallen for her—klaus and rebekah.  

kol mikaelson

take a hint┆requested┆can you do a kol mikaelson one where Caroline is distracting Klaus and she brought the reader with her so she could distract kol? maybe it can be based on the song take a hint from victorious? i’ve listened to it and thought it would be funny and cute! thank you! — @mikaelson-emma

family game night┆one-shot┆where you play Monopoly with the Mikaelson’s and the youngest finds out he’s developed a little crush.

kiss of life┆one-shot┆polyamorous reader in a relationship with kol, klaus, and elijah has died.  however, she comes back in a revenge plot by a witch who lost her wife due to klaus.  

tell me a lie┆short┆loosely based off the quote, “my favorite lie was, ‘i love you.’”  definitely not happy.  reader was cheated on. 

forsaken hearts┆short┆kol doesn’t love you.  what’s his reason?

talks of mortality┆one-shot┆about you trying to talk kol into taking the cure, but he doesn’t want to listen to what you have to say.  

truth or dare┆one-shot┆after a game of truth or dare, you reveal to your friends and siblings that you’re dating kol mikaelson.  

times of change┆short┆an argument between kol and the reader.

imagines

kol pisses you off

rebekah mikaelson

pesky┆short┆using the sentence prompt, “can someone kill him again?”

a bolt from the blue┆one-shot┆the reader has recently moved from colorado and finds one of her first cases on the job to be a dead doctor, invited to a ball held by the mikaelsons.  she goes, expecting to find the killer, but instead, she finds that two of the mikaelsons have fallen for her—rebekah and klaus.  

imagines

rebekah reveals how she truly feels.

damon salvatore

Closure┆one-shot┆a year has passed since Damon and the reader broke up. Damon was with Angie, the reader was a depressed shell of herself. A drunken three AM phone call is exactly what it takes for the reader to get some closure.

by your side┆requested┆Can I get a fluff fic of either Elijah Mikaelson or Damon Salvatore where the reader is going through a rough time (depressive episode) and they comfort reader through it? 😔  — anon

stefan salvatore

only time will tell┆requested┆a stefan soulmate au — @123cvcz 

lovelorn hearts┆requested┆heyyy, can i request a angst fic where reader is damon’s best friend and stefan has a huge crush on her, she overhears damon teasing him about it which leads to his confession, but she’s unsure if she feels the same way and he gets his heart broken all over again? (after elena) thanks, your writing is lovely. — @xoxosinister

miscellaneous 

imagines:

hope hearing stories about you.

☼ X-MEN ☼

charles xavier

happiest year┆one-shot┆although the reader loves charles—although she makes sure he knows that she would do anything for him, he throws it all away. the reader leaves and moves on with her life.

erik lehnsherr

embarrassing moments┆requested┆BROOOOOOO i didn’t know you wrote for the x men … could i please request smth w erik?? smth with mutual pining ~~~ maybe reader is an awkward mutant who’s insecure and can’t talk to erik ……. bro the erik thirst has been REAL recently — @petrichor-ds

sparks fly┆requested┆reader is a cheerful mutant w some sort of electricity ability, and she’s bright until erik comes around.  then she’s removed, quiet, and reserved.  charles has had enough and pairs them up to do training demos tgt (electricity overlaps w magnetism a bit) and then ~romantic tension~ and then reader finally confesses to him after he’s like “why r u so nervous????” — @petrichor-ds

☼ THE 100 ☼

bellamy blake

imagines:

you’re left behind at mount weather, instead of gina.  

#reader insert #x reader #masterlist #fanfiction #x-men #twilight #the vampire diaries #the umbrella academy #lotr #the hobbit #avengers #haikyuu!! #criminal minds #birds of prey

[anakinisvaderisanakin]

Tony Stark Is An Emotional Man - My Unpopular(?) Take

So, I’m rewatching the MCU - because of course I am - and I just realized something watching The Avengers for the first time in probably 10 years.

While everyone believes Tony is a prick - and don’t get me wrong, he is 60% attitude in a small package - until he saves the damn planet; the statement he gives to Banner about the Hulk saving him is very heartfelt. He opens up about his own condition with the shrapnel, which is a rare moment of him being openly vulnerable - especially in the earlier phase of the MCU. He is being genuine, and he is trying to make Banner see the positives and understand that perhaps, the situation isn’t as bleak as he’s been thinking.

Tony is trying to provide help, to comfort Banner; not for his own gain but because he recognizes himself in Banner, in spite of their very different ways of handling their inner demons, and their wildly differing personalities. Because he knows what it’s like to lose your way and your self worth, and he wants to see Banner regain some sense of himself the same way he has.

It’s nice to see the kind side to Tony, and for him to expose it willingly to help a fellow team mate - and eventually friend - accept himself and his inner struggle. Tony does not get credit enough for the fact that he always did have that side to him, he just didn’t know how to show it. Even his jokes and snarky sarcasm get less “mean spirited” as he evolves, and grows as a person.

I feel like Iron Man 2 coupled with The Avengers (and of course Iron Man 3 added onto that) are a perfect portrayal of how Tony’s more outward sense of caring for people, despite his awkward sense of socializing, was already beginning to shine through the cracks.

To me, Tony Stark is by far the most compelling character because while I am not entirely like him, I recognize so much of myself and my own hardships. It’s never too late to reinvent yourself, and Tony is the perfect metaphor for that. He even directly likens himself to a phoenix in Iron Man 2, although played for laughs at the Stark Expo.

But not only that, later on in the movie when Steve insinuates that Tony is not a hero, that he would never sacrifice himself on behalf of another; that he fights for himself alone, and tells him he's basically nothing without the suit - you can see it's hurting him. Tony never really holds eye contact unless it's worth while; unless it's getting to him and requires his full attention coming from someone he truly trusts, unless it means something. You see him keep his eyes off of everybody in social situations before he knows them or they have earned his respect; you see him avoiding getting in neck deep, avoiding and brushing off comments on his distant persona.

But that insult right there; from the man his father would rave about, that's taking. You see the pain in his eyes, you see the fact that he's being torn open. You see that he's brought right back to who he once was, reliving the guilt of every mistake he ever made. All because of Steve's judgmental, misguided perception of him. Tony hides his true self; hides his suffering, and his internal grappling with his shame and guilt over every problem and death he's directly or indirectly caused. The fact that Steve Rogers - of all people, as the revered Captain America - cannot see through his surface disguise is really getting to him. I believe Tony had assumed Steve would be superhuman, and he's struck by the realization that Steve is no more human than he himself is. He has imperfections, and flaws, and jumps to conclusions.

And the fact that it is Steve, of all people, making these assumptions of him and taking these jabs at him makes it all the worse. You need only watch for Tony keeping eye contact throughout the verbal onslaught to know it's hitting home; and to know that Tony feels, Tony knows this is what people all initially think of him. He had just hoped that somebody as subjectively righteous and morally good as Steve would have the ability to see through the facade. The fact that he doesn't, and that he doesn't hold back on his opinion, is what hits the hardest.

Another point is when Fury informs the remaining team of Coulson's (faked) death. Tony doesn't look at anyone, he sits turned completely away from the conversation. You can see he's close to losing it, and if he were to speak, if he were to look up, were to make any sort of eye contact directly - he would crack. That's one thing I love about RDJ's portrayal of Tony; the fact that he is so terrified of showing his vulnerable side in front of others, even when he is grieving or blaming himself for any mishap. He feels like he has to be the strong one, like he has to keep it together. Not for himself as much as for everyone else - because if the unfeeling, arrogant Iron Man breaks, how are any of the other team mates going to make it?

If Tony of all people reveals he takes it harder than almost anyone else present, how are they going to see him as the same man? I love how it is only later in the MCU, that he exposes this side of himself more willingly and freely - like in Endgame where he mentions how he lost “the kid” while referring to Peter. He not only maintains eye contact with Steve as he admits that, he chokes up. This same theme is prevalent between them in Civil War when Tony asks Steve to lay down his guard and hand over Bucky, “because it’s us” - which is a testament to the fact that Tony has now accepted Steve as a friend and ally, and this betrayal of his hard earned trust is breaking his heart. But this early on, none of this has become a valid option to him yet. So he keeps it inside; refusing to show his true colours.

And in this moment, what does he do when it gets too much? When he's required to speak up, to acknowledge Fury's mention of The Avengers project? He ups and leaves. Because if he speaks; judging by the eyes alone (which is yet another credit to Robert) he's going to tear up. And hence, he walks out to get it under control, to reil himself back in. It’s a habit he throughout the franchise will begin to display less and less; as he learns to be more comfortable with the team as friends, as well as openly displaying his own emotions.

We see another side to this later when Steve approaches Tony alone one on one; and Tony initially attempts to make quips about how Coulson shouldn't have gone alone, how he was an outgunned idiot. Steve cuts straight to the core, and Tony snaps. You see him nearly tear up, you see how upset he truly is deep down and how he was only doing his best to play it off the only way he knows how. But as soon as he is spoken to, is forced to make an assessment, to actually talk about it; to look Steve in the eye and defend himself - that's the exposed vulnerability that is the real Tony Stark.

Behind the snarks, behind the facade, behind the charade of the arrogant, nonchalant prick he’s been trying to make the world see him for. He's as human as he could ever be; and I believe this is also the first time Steve notices that there is more to Tony than he had presumed. He too, had assumed Tony is too wrapped up in his own ego and lavish life resume to care for the smaller man. But here, he sees that Tony feels, Tony sympathizes, and Tony is deeply traumatized by the fact that he - as he feels - allowed this to happen. He sees that Tony believes this is on his conscious.

Tony's glassy eyes and emotional turmoil betray him, and even though he jumps right back to his intellect and brains as a safety net and a defense mechanism - addressing Loki's plan to hit them at home and split them apart - this is the first time Steve is exposed to Tony's determination, ability to assess and deduce the situation, as well as his belief in doing the right thing (another theme seen later in Age of Ultron regarding Tony’s creation of Ultron himself, as well as in Civil War where Tony is adamant that the Sokovia Accords are the right path to take to pay for the critical mistake Ultron turned out to be.) And as they assemble, you're struck with the realization that this has been enough of an eye opener for Steve to realize that there is more to Tony Stark than meets the eye.

And who is first to the tower, leading the charge if not Tony?

And despite his blind faith in his own skill and ability to stall Loki just long enough; there's the epitome of the courage Tony possesses. He knows that without the suit, he has no fighting chance. He knows Loki could snap his neck in the blink of an eye. And still, he never backs off. Indeed, there is an underlying death wish or at the very least a sense of him subconsciously feeling he deserves and is fated a grim deminse - but it does take unprecedented bravery to put yourself in such clear danger.

Tony Stark could be called many things; but a coward is not one of them. Sure, he does have the untested suit on hold, but he did not know 100% it was going to work as planned. He was counting on it, but you know a part of him knew it was a long shot and might not work out in the end. The suit could have been faulty, Loki could have cracked his head open; the cavalry could have been running late. Still, Tony gambles with his life and luckily barely comes out on top.

At last, we have the finale. What can be said about it, except the fact that it shows exactly who Tony truly is? He knows he's going to die - indeed he doesn't - but he is intent on that, he is accepting death and welcoming it. If it helps save the world, if it will keep Pepper and everyone he loves, everyone he knows; everyone alive safe.

Here, the decision from the first Iron Man to actually show us Tony's eyes and face behind the mask is a godsend. Seeing as RDJ is an actor who communicates so much of his emotional range with his eyes only; we are given an easy access to see everything Tony is experiencing flash through them. We see the fear, the pain, the uncertainty; the acceptance of the inevitable. We see his eyes convey the jumbled mass of conflicting emotions speeding through his mind, we see how he finally just relents and gives in to what he thinks is going to be his time of dying. His final moments.

And he has made them worthwhile, he has already achieved what Yinsen begged of him in that cave in Afghanistan - he has made his survival count. He has saved numerous lives, and if his death is what it takes - so be it. Cue the parallel to Endgame. Hell, even Age of Ultron has elements of this as previously mentioned; although that one was on Tony himself, and his irrevocable fear and flaws as a human being. However, here the team sees Tony's will to sacrifice himself firsthand, for the first time; and contrary to Steve's initial assessment that Tony would never put his life on the line for anyone but himself - he does just that.

This is what makes this movie so powerful.

Sure, it builds upon every team member’s arc; even Fury's. But it is Tony who proves himself above all; who shows the team what we the audience already knew. That he is a hero, that our past does not define us. That Tony Stark feels, that he knows right from wrong although he's still stumbling blind half the time - just like the rest of us. And it proves to Steve - to the entire team - that he is not merely the selfish, arrogant asshole only sticking up for himself. He is a man, albeit a flawed one, who cares deeply. Who feels, who mourns, who appreciates life and the people around him; and who is - behind the barrier he's placed between himself and everyone else to avoid getting hurt - extremely insecure. He is fearful, apprehensive, sensitive, and well aware of his shortcomings.

And Tony Stark is, first and foremost, a good man.

Repost from my previous blog.

#tony stark #iron man #discourse #meta #tony #stark #anthony stark #rdj #robert downey junior #mcu #marvel #marvel cinematic universe #infinity saga #the avengers #my take #hot takes #cause i love tony #fight me

[gaiapaia]

Kermit and Friends: God Bless America

Kermit and Friends was all over the news cycle last week.

From Elisa Jordana being interviewed in US Weekly Magazine, to Wendy Williams addressing Elisa and Andy Dick on her show, to even Fox News covering the story.... everyone wanted to discuss the bombshell Elisa dropped last week on Kermit and Friends regarding Andy Dick's most recent arrest.

All of this began on Tuesday evening. Elisa's birthday was on Wednesday and she remained relatively quiet on her social media and in the Kermit and Friends Discord. So what happened at her birthday party?

Andy forgot about Elisa's birthday. No shocker there. Still, Elisa managed to get Andy on the phone and paid to have a car go pick him up. To Andy’s credit, he got in the car. Unfortunately, that’s the only credit he will receive from this point forward.

When Andy arrived, the first thing Elisa did was introduce him to her lovely mother. Instead of small talking and exchanging pleasantries, Andy immediately asked Elisa’s mom if she had any pills she could give him. Yikes!

Andy would only stay at the party for a short while. He showed more attention to Lisa Vanderpump than he did to Elisa, and then he would run off to go hang out with the guy who allegedly broke his ankle, Lucas.

So Andy pretty much ruined Elisa’s birthday. Does he care? Of course not. Andy wouldn’t talk to Elisa again until Saturday night when he called Elisa to ask her to pay for his hotel bill. After Elisa declined, Andy hung up on her and blocked Elisa on Instagram. This is really sad, pathetic behavior.

Elisa is claiming she’s officially done with Andy. The thing is, Elisa has one of the most forgiving souls on the planet. All Andy would have to do is have one nice conversation with Elisa and she’ll most likely then treat him (and his friends) to dinner. Who knows if Andy will even do that though. I personally hope not, and if he does... maybe Elisa will keep her foot down this time and refuse to allow Andy to keep hurting her like this.

I’ve been friends with Elisa since 2015. I could do a run down right now of the guys Elisa has dated since I’ve been blessed to know her, and I wouldn’t have anything good to say about any of them except maybe Gonzo, which honestly was just a fling.

Elisa deserves better than this. I desperately hope throughout our friendship that I set some kind of precedent to show Elisa how she should be treated by anyone who claims to love her. If I can get one thing out of my efforts these last 5 years, it’s that. It’s fine that Elisa doesn’t love me back... but it’s my main wish that she someday understands how I treat her is how the real man in her life should treat her. And hopefully that guy has many other amazing qualities to offer too, because Elisa deserves that as well if she’s going to give her heart to someone.

For all my bickering and griping about the men in Elisa’s life this last decade, we met a lovely young woman yesterday by the name of Mel who’s had it even worse than Elisa!

Mel is Jesse G-Rider’s ex-girlfriend. She was a part of the infamous trap house gang right before Elisa became emerged in it. Mel’s relationship with Jesse was extremely abusive, to say the least. There were cases of petty jealousy, beatings, drugs... you name it, it most likely happened.

Jesse called in highly upset with Elisa for having Mel on the show. Jesse claims he has a restraining order against Mel despite the fact that Mel moved all the way to Detroit, Michigan to escape Jesse.

Jesse then threatened Elisa with legal action, claiming it’s illegal to help a person contact another person who has a restraining order against them. Newsflash to Jesse: first of all, that’s not illegal, dumb dumb. Secondly, YOU called into the show. Elisa didn’t call you with Mel on the line. So even if in some ass backwards World where you could press charges against Elisa, they would be dropped immediately because JESSE initiated the contact by his own free will, and it’s all on recorded video.

Anyway, Mel was fantastic on the show. She had cute little elf ears, top notch internet and audio, a nice gaming chair... Elisa was impressed by all of this, as I was I. Mel looked like a professional streamer and she was a good storyteller that was also very vulnerable and honest. She’s everything Elisa looks for in a Kermit and Friends star. Hopefully Mel will become a regular in our community.

During Mel’s interview, Sharmin Smith went in head first about the horrors of abuse and what America needs to do to help women like Mel out. As a survivor of abuse, Sharmin has some strong feelings on the matter and she was not shy to share them. Even though her Presidential bid for 2020 was unsuccessful, I hear by declare Sharmin Smith President of Kermit and Friends. In my book, that’s why better than being President of the United States of America!

We love America on Kermit and Friends though. Yesterday was July the 4th and Elisa invited Tony Alexander on to discuss his career in the American military and what he’s heroically done to help fellow veterans who have had a rough time adjusting to normal life once they returned home from the war. Tony was a class act through and through, and it was great to see Kermit make a new friend like him on Independence Day.

Another US veteran joined the show, Kermit’s old pal Chris Christine. She said a lovely prayer and then randomly flip opened the Bible so that God could choose a special passage to share with all of Kermit’s beautiful friends. She landed on 1 Kings 6, which is about Solomon building a temple of the Lord, much like Elisa has built the Kermitarian Church!

Claire from New Jersey called at the beginning of the show to ask Elisa her thoughts on Wendy Williams’ segment about Elisa and Andy. Wendy wasn’t very kind - she made light of Andy’s addiction despite being an addict herself, she told a very distasteful joke about Bill Cosby getting hired before Andy ever would, she mispronounced Elisa’s name on purpose, and she claimed that Elisa was trying to use Andy for success. So funny how the ignorant morons who say stuff like that don’t realize it’s been Andy using Elisa this entire time... it’s honestly sexism. Wendy as a woman herself should know better, but I guess her IQ just isn’t at a place where she could ever grasp that.

Sigmond returned to Kermit and Friends this week. Elisa kindly invited Sigmond to her birthday party on Wednesday and by all accounts, he was a superb guest. He even bought Elisa a present! Yep, Sigmond Twayne's Mental Cookbook was his gift and Elisa seemed to love it. This led to Gonzo calling in to ask why the book is so cheap on Amazon. Sigmond, remembering that it was Gonzo who called him a serial killer last week, said Gonzo is a liar and that the book cost $37 on Amazon. Well, Gonzo was actually being truthful because at the time of this blog entry, the book is on sale for just $8.76 from it’s listed price of $37.00. Do NOT miss out on this AMAZING deal and buy your copy today by clicking here! 

Of course, Kermit and Friends isn’t Kermit and Friends without some spectacular musical performances. Boy, were we blessed with some good ones for the 4th of July. Elisa’s dad Craig returned to the show to beautifully perform a patriotic song from the 1700′s in which I sadly can’t find the title of. Sigmond’s partner Wappy performed an incredible original song and covered Pool Shark by Sublime. Elisa would also play one of Sugar’s awesome music videos for everyone to enjoy. Good stuff all around from Kermit’s unbelievably talented friends.

All in all, it was a very eventual Kermit and Friends, one absolutely fitting for Independence Day. The future seems more uncertain than ever, but as long as Kermit has all her friends to enjoy, everything will be A-okay. Can’t wait to see what next week’s show will bring :)

[imaginesmai]

Peter Parker - A phone call away

This if fluff. I don’t know why I’m so soft lately. 

Plot: Peter is having a hard time sleeping, and doesn’t know how to tell you. Eventually, someone catches him sleeping on a public place and you find out. The thing is, you love him and Peter should know that you’re always there for him. Even if it’s just by a phone call.

It was a matter of time until Peter fucked up somehow.

He had been huddled over Ned’s phone in the most isolated school washroom, sharing a set of earbuds. They were both running late for second period, but they needed to check out the news everyone at school seemed to be laughing at. On the screen, a local news began on headline ‘Spider-Man or Siesta-Man?”. It was accompanied by a video of Peter, fully clad in his suit and hanging upside-down from a bus shelter on 45th street, snoring dramatically.

About ten seconds into the video, the camera operator yelled something and Peter yelped in surprise, crashing to the ground and gracelessly landing on his head in a heap. He groaned and rolled over dramatically, stumbling to his feet. Peter was about to yell something when the screen went black.

Back in the school, Peter face palmed in embarrassment and slumped to the bathroom floor, sitting with his back to a stall door. Ned quickly shut off the video and crouched in front of his friend, putting a supportive hand on his shoulder.

“I’m dead” Peter whispered, feeling dread filling him. “She’s gonna find out, and I’m – she’s gonna kill me, Ned. She’s gonna rip me limb by –“

“Hey, hey. It’s alright, dude” Ned cut his friend. “It’s just the news of the day. She might not see it. Go do something heroic tonight and you’ll be everyone’s hero tonight.”

“Come on, Ned, she has an alert on my name on the Internet, just like Mr Stark” Peter sighed, knowing it would be very unlikely you hadn’t seen it yet. “She’s gonna have my head”

“Well” Ned swallowed, trying to look for something. “At least she’s your girlfriend? It might make things better”

“That only makes it worse. Honestly, I would prefer Mr Stark”

The words left his mouth without thinking much. He didn’t know which one was worse; if daughter or father. The video of Spiderman wouldn’t be that of a big deal, if it wasn’t because both of the Starks were worried about the thing with the accords and the vigilantes. Still, Peter couldn’t find an inch of fear in his body; he was too tired to care about the consequences, due to the fact that he hadn’t been sleeping for, at least, two weeks. Sure, some naps here and there and sometimes he blinked for too long. But he was still tired, because everytime he closed his eyes, there was something bad waiting for him.

Something bad, as a building collapsing on top of him. Or the vulture killing him in the car. The worst one were when you were with him, in that warehouse. Peter Parker had problems sleeping, but he wasn’t about to accept that.

“Are you sure you’re… okay?” Ned asked, wary. He had noticed how his friend seemed more and more down every day. “This isn’t like you”

“I’m just tired” Peter answered, not having the energy for his usual creatively evasive excuses.

As Ned raised a sceptical eyebrow and opened his mouth to question further, Peter’s phone buzzed, and finally the fear made room in Peter’s mind.

Incoming FaceTime from GORGEOUS Stark

Peter saw the notification and bit his lip. He knew you weren’t in highschool, being home-schooled and all that shit; and from the looks of it, you knew he wasn’t in class, because you were calling him. In his screen stood the photo of Peter and you on the lab, faces full of a thick white foam you had created acting as moustaches. The seconds went by and eventually the photo disappeared, leaving Peter’s dark phone.

Then, it started again.

“Peter! Pick it up!” Ned almost shouted, his voice coming out two octaves higher than usual.

“No” Peter frowned. “If I take it, she will know I’m not in class. And if she finds out? You don’t want to –“

“Peter, seriously. She is going to get more mad if –“

Before Ned could finish his sentence, the phone beeped and the call was forced through, showing your annoyed face on the screen. Behind you, Peter could see you room; so that wasn’t that bad, because your father was still out of sight. Your frown and hard eyes were enough to make Ned step out of sight and Peter to swallow hard.

“Did you just ghosted me?”

“That was rude” Peter tried to joke. “Since when can you do that? I could have been busy”

“Ruder than you ghosting me?” you chuckled humourlessly “Since I have a mess of a boyfriend that can’t stay still”

“I’m in class, darling” Peter whispered, trying to end the call; but he knew better than to hang up on you.

“Really? Because I don’t know much about highschool, but that seems like a bathroom floor” you looked around, and finally settled in Peter.

In a second, Peter relaxed. He saw how your eyes went softer when you took into his tired face. With a vague gesture, he made Ned leave, and Peter was alone in the bathroom. He saw you from the other side moving to your bed, leaving the phone on a pillow while you accommodated in it. From that angle, he could see the AC/DC shit you were wearing; and the spidey pyjamas he had bought you as a joke.

When your face came back into the screen, he could see that you were no longer angry, just concerned. Peter finished to slide against the wall, stretching his legs in front of him and smiling shakily. He didn’t know why, but he wanted to cry.

“You look like shit” you teased.

“I’m fine” Peter said softly. He glanced at the small image of his face on the screen. He was pale against the bathroom wall behind him, his cheeks looked like sunken-in shadows, and the dark purple bags underneath his eyes stuck out like tattoos against his skin.

“Yeah, definitely fine. When was the last time you slept, Parker?”

“Last night”

Technically, he had fallen asleep for a while inside of the bus shelter. He had been listening to the playlist you had made for him the first time you guessed his sleeping problems, called ‘Spidey Lullabies’. Peter had to admit that, even if he had denied listening to it when you made it, he had thanked the stars for having you last night. It was a mix of the songs he loved the most, and if he closed his eyes and let his mind wander, he would almost feel you pressed against his body, hugging his nightmares away.

His dream was short lived when he saw you raising a brow.

“Let me rephrase that. When was the last time you slept somewhere other than inside the bus shelter? In a bed, maybe?”

“So you have seen it?” Peter grimaced in embarrassment.

“You know we have the Google alert. Besides, it’s viral” There was a pregnant pause, before you looked down and Peter felt like the worst human being. “I know I haven’t been paying you much attention. I’m sorry – I’m sorry if this is somehow my fault. Pete, I want you to talk to me. If I have done –“

“No!” Peter interrupted you. He propped himself up from the door, and gripped the phone with both of his hands. “No, Y/N, I promise this is not about it. I – it’s just me, it has nothing to do with you. You’re perfect, and I love you. Please, believe me. You haven’t done anything”

Of all things, Peter would have preferred you to get angry. To yell at him for being so careless and for sleeping in the bus shelter. He would have preferred for you to give him the silent treatment. He didn’t blame you for having a life, for trying to balance your normal life with the superhero one. Your father was Tony Stark, you didn’t need to deal with more shit already.

“Hey” your gentle voice broke him from his thoughts, and he focused once more in you. That time, you were closer to the phone, and had a smile on your face. “It’s okay, it’s none of our faults. I don’t blame you for what happened, we all have our days. I love you 3000, Pete. I’m here for everything, baby”

For some reason, your words hit him harder than before. They were full of worry and love, so full of them, that Peter had to clamp his lips shut tightly, holding back a sob as fat tears began to fill his eyes. The first one spilled down his cheeks as the exhaustion, the memories and the fear made it to him.

He closed his eyes tightly and banged his head hard against the stall behind him. He tried to take in a shaky breath through his nose, because he was not about th blubber on the bathroom floor in front of you. You didn’t seem to mind, so he gave it a try.

“I’m not sleeping” he confessed, his voice low and broken. He didn’t care about how vulnerable. “I can’t – the building, t-the gun… it – everything c-comes back to me. When I… I close my eyes, h-he’s there. And – and, sometimes, you’re th-there too. A-and I, I can’t –“

“You know” you cut Peter off, sensing that if he kept talking in that dirty and small stall he would fall into an anxiety attack. “Thermophysics is actually pretty boring, and I bet you already know everything that can be taught in that hell hole. What do you say if we’re teenagers without responsibilities and, you know, ditch school? I heard Mr Delmar is trying new sandwiches, and it’s a pretty day to try them in Central park”

Peter chuckled wetly at you saying, ‘ditch school’. As the daughter of Tony Stark, believe it or not, you were forced to be extremely responsible and focused. It was the first time you proposed doing something that your mother Pepper wouldn’t approve, so Peter nodded weakly. He didn’t have strength to move out of the bathroom, he just wanted to have you close and hug you. He needed physical attention, and he nodded stronger a second time.

You smiled at him and bit your lower lip. You were pretty. It had been a while since Peter had seen you, too focused on patrolling and not dying out of exhaustion, and you looked to him like an angelical version of yourself.

“I’ll be there in five, I won’t tell my father if you don’t either”

“Promise. I think he would be angrier at me, anyway” Peter cringed when he thought about Tony angry. “Does he, you know, have – uh, seen the –“

“No, don’t worry. He’s locked in the lab, and mom and I took care of it” you winked at him. The phone moved and you were up, the sun on your face. “Give me five to get dressed, I’ll be there in ten. Don’t move, Parker. I’ll be very disappointed if you ghost me for the second time”

“Don’t think of it” Peter sighed, happy. “See you. I, uh, I love you. A lot”

“Me too, Pete. Try not to fall asleep, I’m coming to the rescue”

The phone-call ended, and Peter closed his eyes. He felt a lot better – and tired – than when it started.

True to your word, on the ninth minute you were there. You helped him to get up, washed his hands and face and led him out of the school. You bought some sandwiches and sat on Central Park, on the shadow of a tree. You ate and occasionally talked, Peter just listened until his body naturally gravitated to your side.

Finally, he laid down on your lap, and while you played with his hair and told him about thermophysics and how boring it was, Peter fell asleep. For the three and a half hours that were left from school, Peter slept without nightmares.

How could he have them, when he had his own saviour with him?

Peter Parker taglist:

@delicately-important-trash​

@lexxxistrips​

@smilexcaptainx​

@aikaterrina​

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[cuinawen]

Being Obvious

A Clint Barton/Bella Swan one shot

3175 words

Bella has a crush, Natasha thinks it’s a little obvious but Clint needs a nudge in the right direction before he’ll make a move

Warnings: language, suggestive themes

~*~0~*~

The chime of the elevator sounded, echoing just slightly across the open space and Clint froze for a split second before something akin to panic hit. Not that he would ever admit that he panicked about anything… ever.

He’d been in the middle of setting up for his latest prank, which would be ruined if he was caught in the act, so without a thought he hopped up onto the counter and pulled himself up into a large air vent, carefully closing the grate behind him.

It took only a few seconds, so by the time he could hear a familiar laugh he was out of sight, no trace left that he’d been there.

It wasn’t the first time he’d used these vents as a means of traversing the tower (which was how he’d known this particular grate was unscrewed already), so shifting as quietly as he could, he settled in to wait and watch until the room was empty again, a small grin forming as he saw his two favourite women enter the room.

“I mean really,” Natasha bemoaned, a wry grin on her face as she referenced a recent incident with a former S.H.I.E.L.D agent, “Is it really so hard to find a guy that won’t damn near wet himself just because he accidentally saw me nude, all I was doing was having a quick shower. Honestly, he reacted worse than Steve did that one time.”

“Steve? You mean Cap? Nooo,” Bella gaped, her eyes shining with amusement.

“Yep, he got all red and did that ‘looking anywhere but you’ thing that he does. I wasn’t even completely bare,” Natasha smirked, “I told him that was the only time he’d ever get away with calling me ma’am.”

Clint watched silently from the vent as Bella descended into laughter, suddenly feeling like he maybe shouldn’t be listening in to this conversation. As much as he loved that Natasha had unusually taken a liking to the shy woman since she’d started with the team as their medic, and unofficial lab manager under Bruce, her attempts to draw Bella out of her shell sometimes made him a little unsettled.

He had a hard enough time keeping Bella from straying into his thoughts at the best of times.

She was tiny and cute, adorably awkward, made him laugh, and had the prettiest eyes he’d ever seen. She made his inner Neanderthal want to just drag her off to his room so he could keep her all to himself while he did things with her that you didn’t discuss in polite company.

Of course, he wasn’t about to actually tell her that. Rejection would be one thing, but there was no way he wanted to make things awkward for the team if she didn’t feel anything for him; and as good as he usually was at reading people, he just didn’t know when it came to her.

Bella snickered as she snapped a fresh pod into the coffee machine and hit the button waiting for it to start up.

“So, what about you?” Natasha asked suddenly, making her blink in surprise.

“Me? No, no one’s been seeing me naked.” Bella grinned, making Natasha snort inelegantly.

“I think that’s the problem,” She cackled, bumping Bella lightly with her elbow, “What about finding you a guy?”

The sudden rosy blush that spread from Bella’s cheeks right down her chest took Clint by surprise, and he was surprised neither of the women appeared to have heard him fidgeting uncomfortably in the metal vent as he wondered just how far down that blush actually went.

If he’d been paying closer attention he might have seen the tiny spark of awareness that flickered across Natasha’s face.

“So… there is a guy you want then,” She pressed, giving Bella her best faux intimidating stare.

Bella’s face felt like it was absolutely flaming as she looked at the older woman, trying to think of any way to get out of this line of questioning.

“It’s Clint isn’t it?” Natasha asked bluntly, already knowing the answer and grinning when Bella twitched, “Don’t even try to deny it, you know you want him as your own personal Cupid.”

The dry amused tone plus the bizarre imagery had Bella laughing in spite of herself.

“Okay, okay,” She finally admitted sheepishly, “Yeah… I mean, it’s just his smile, and the way his eyes crinkle when he laughs…and oh god, those arms.”

“Not to mention he’s got a really fine ass.” Natasha leaned forward with a grin her voice low and conspiratorial, and then chuckled when Bella’s eyes widened comically, “What? Just because I don’t see him that way, doesn’t mean I don’t have eyes.”

Clint honestly wasn’t sure whether to blush or preen like a peacock at their words as he vaguely heard Bella humming in agreement while Nat laughed delightedly.

Well, now I know. A slow grin spread across his face, though it quickly creased into a frown as the conversation below him continued.

“Doesn’t matter,” Bella was smiling, though to a trained ear the sadness was clear in her voice, “I’m not sure he even notices I exist half the time.”

“Oh pfft, he notices,” Natasha disputed with a smirk, “And if he doesn’t make a move then he’s an idiot.”

Their travel mugs now filled with steaming coffee, both women turned to leave the kitchen, but not before Natasha turned slightly and looked right at the cover disguising the vent where Clint was perched, raising her eyebrows.

Of course, she knew I was here the whole time, Clint thought with a flash of wry amusement, damn woman knows everything.

His prank completely forgotten for the time being, he slid from his hiding place and scratched his head thoughtfully, frowning slightly at the stray cobweb that clung to the strands of hair under his fingers.

He needed a shower, and then he needed to think about seducing a tiny medic.

~*~0~*~

Bella had been completely serious when she’d admitted to Nat that she had a bit of a thing for the dirty-blond archer. In fact, she’d had a crush on him since she’d first met him, and it had made patching him up post-mission just a little awkward for her the few times he’d needed her to.

He’d put her at ease just by being himself though, cracking jokes and making her smile as she tended to him and whoever else might need it.

Natasha had been the first member of the team to invite Bella for coffee, taking a liking to the shy medic who had nerves of steel when it came to her job. Not many people could stand their ground against Tony, or be around Bruce without giving him fearful looks.

Then gradually she’d spent more and more time with the rest of the team, eventually being able to call them all friends. Even Thor, who’d intimidated the hell out of her the first time she’d been there for one of his visits until she realised he was a big softy when it came to the people he cared about.

The only person who was able to make her nervous now was Clint, though she wasn’t planning on admitting that. It didn’t help that something had changed recently, he was acting differently around her.

She had even asked Natasha if she’d mentioned anything to Clint about their conversation in the kitchen a couple of weeks before, but the former spy had just smirked and sworn up and down that she hadn’t said a word.

He just kept going sending panty dropping smiles her way, leaving her with a tingly warm feeling that made her heart stutter and her thighs clench each time it happened. It was getting harder to act normally around him.

Glancing across the room, Bella’s eyes automatically found him, and she inhaled sharply watching him tilt a beer bottle to his lips, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed. Oh god, he’s hot.

The team had come back that day from successfully clearing a Hydra base with no injuries, and while Jarvis was sifting through the mountains of files they had acquired Tony had decided they should have a small celebration.

Unusually for Tony, he’d kept it small and not too extravagant. It was mostly just the team and any of their partners, plus a few people from the tower that they were close to, so it was pretty casual, especially now it was getting quite late. Everyone was there just letting their hair down and relaxing for a while.

“Watch it; you’ve got a little drool.”

Bella jumped and turned to half-heartedly swat at the laughing redhead who easily dodged her.

“You’re getting a bit obvious girl,” Natasha grinned, “And for that matter, so is he.”

“Huh? No way, he just likes to flirt a little,” Bella protested, trying not to get her hopes up despite the warm feeling Natasha’s words were giving her.

“I swear, you’re an idiot, a loveable idiot,” She rolled her eyes fondly, deciding to give her friends a helping hand, “Do you see him looking at anyone else like he’s wishing he could strip them naked with his eyes? He wants you. Trust me, I know Clint.”

“But…” Bella faltered, her wide eyes showing her vulnerability. There’s no way.

Somehow understanding what she was thinking, Natasha sighed and patted Bella’s arm lightly before turning to walk away, tossing one last comment over her shoulder.

“Trust me… and just so you know, he’s not a one night kind of guy.”

Bella swallowed heavily then took a sip of the beer she was holding to combat her suddenly dry mouth.

Somehow Clint had picked that exact moment to catch her eye, giving her the exact ‘naked wishes’ look Nat had described, and though she knew there was no way he could have heard what Nat had been saying Bella couldn’t help the blush that spread across her cheeks.

Clint’s lips quirked into a half smile, his eyebrows rising slightly as he looked across the room at the short brunette who was blushing prettily. Not for the first time, he wondered where that blush would spread to and he couldn’t resist a wink and a slow smirk around the top of the bottle as he drank.

Bella was glad Nat had gone to flirt with Bruce, who was endearingly oblivious as usual. At least she wasn’t there to witness Bella faltering as she tried not to give any outward signs of the effect he was having on her.

~*~0~*~

She was dying. She really was going to spontaneously combust and die.

All because of the man currently sat with his arm around her, his thumb lightly tracing back and forth over a small strip of exposed skin near her hip where her shirt had ridden up slightly.

The party had wound down and the core team were grouped together on the sofas off to the side of the room, drinking and laughing. Bella had switched to soda after a couple of beers, knowing she was a lightweight but was still enjoying herself.

Somehow she’d ended up squashed next to Clint on the sofa, and she wasn’t sure which was worse; the heated looks across the room or the tingling warmth down her side where she was pressed against him.

Then he had shifted suddenly, moving his arm so that it rested behind her instead of in between them, making Bella’s eyes shoot to his face. To her surprise, she’d found him looking down at her with an easy grin, his arm curling around her.

Somehow he was reducing her to a gooey mess, doing something that could still be considered innocent, while being able to appear completely focused on the conversation around them. Damn secret super assassin training.

She was terrible at hiding her emotions. In fact, right now she was sure it was written all over her face that she wanted nothing more than to be utterly ruined in all the best ways by the man next to her.

Judging by the slightly smug grin on Natasha’s face it appeared that assumption was correct, and Bella wondered if the only reason Tony hadn’t said anything was because he currently appeared to be very distracted by a tipsy Pepper.

Finally reaching her breaking point and feeling in desperate need of either a cold shower or some serious alone time, Bella carefully got up and excused herself, quickly saying goodnight to the group and completely missing the significant look Nat gave Clint.

Clint smirked at the look Nat gave him as she mouthed the words go get your girl. Her meddling was as amusing as it was beneficial. Few people would ever guess just how soft-hearted she was deep down when it came to the people she cared about.

Giving her a subtle mock-salute, he got up and followed behind Bella ignoring the curious glances he got from a few of the others.

She was leaning against the wall waiting for the elevator when he caught up to her, and the look somewhere between startled and shy and hopeful that crossed her face absolutely melted him.

Before he could second guess himself, he was standing right in front of her. Their bodies close enough that each inhale of breath made her chest push up against his almost teasingly.

Bracing one hand against the wall next to her head, Clint lightly cupped her neck with the other, his thumb resting on her cheek. He could feel her heart thumping, racing under his fingertips and it made him grin slightly.

“Am I making you nervous, little swan?”

His voice was low and sultry, stirring up a wave of desire that crashed through her as he stroked his thumb across her cheek, his body pressing deliciously against hers.

The small needy sound that bubbled up from her throat would have embarrassed her, if Clint wasn’t now pressing her tighter to the wall, his hands running almost possessively down her sides and over her hips.

“Feels like we’ve been dancing around each other, but if you don’t want this, say the word now,” He murmured, his lips brushing her ear as he leaned down to speak.

A literal shiver ran from her head to her feet at the look he was giving her and Bella had to shake her head slightly to clear enough to give him the reply he was clearly waiting for.

“What word would that be?” She breathed meeting his gaze steadily, a slightly cheeky smile lighting up her face, “I don’t want to say it by accident.”

“Fuck woman,” Clint groaned, “What you do to me.”

The sudden kiss was gentle but no less intense for it, and Bella’s eyes nearly rolled in her head at the feel and taste of him.

A small squeak escaped her as one of his hands tangled in her hair and cupped the back of her head while the other landed far less innocuously on her ass.

“Too much?” Clint murmured against her lips.

“No… definitely no,” Bella replied, a faint blush lighting her cheeks even as she fisted her small hand in the front of his shirt in an effort to prevent him from moving away.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere,” Clint grinned teasingly, backing away and sliding a hand down her arm to entangle his fingers with hers.

“Where we’re going, though, is away from this corridor. Unless you particularly want Tony to find us here, nosy bastard that he is.”

Bella giggled, squeezing his fingers lightly and reverting to his last name like they usually did when they were joking with each other.

“You trying to get me alone, Barton?”

“I’ve already managed to get you alone sweetheart, what I’m trying to do now is stop myself from just throwing you over my shoulder and taking you to my bed caveman style.”

Another one of those head to foot shivers. She was certain that Clint had noticed it this time too, judging by the amused glint in his eyes.

The slight strained tremor of his hand belied his teasing humour though, and Bella realised he hadn’t exactly been joking.

The small soft sound that left her throat was the last straw for Clint and the tension finally snapped when he turned and headed for the lift without another word, gently tugging Bella along with him.

Bella was quiet while he requested Jarvis to take them to his floor, his husky voice doing things to her insides.

Neither of them said anything else as the doors opened and he led her a little way down the corridor. Feeling sure her heart was pounding loudly enough for Clint to hear it, Bella watched him open his door, her heart actually stuttering then at the smile he gave her.

The room was neat unsurprisingly, with a large TV and a comfy looking couch with a thick blanket folded over the back of it. One wall held several bows, quivers full of arrows and a wide array of other weapons and just to the side of it there was a short workbench nearby, a bow and several tools resting on top of it.

On the other side of the room there was a small kitchenette area and in the wall between that and his work area them there were two doors leading to a bathroom and bedroom. The door to the latter was slightly open and a warm glow came from a lamp, illuminating the room softly.

Her gaze fell on his large neatly made bed and that light dusting of red spread across her cheeks again, prompting Clint to gently brush his knuckles down the flushed skin, enjoying the way her breathing hitched at his touch.

“Blushing again?” He grinned, “What exactly were you thinking to blush like that just from looking at my bed?”

“As if you don’t know Barton,” Bella snorted softly.

“You really need to go back to calling me Clint,” He murmured in reply, “Because it’s just gonna just sound really odd if you scream Barton once I’m between your thighs.”

“Oh,” Bella didn’t have time to gape at him for long.

It took little more than a second for him to pull her against his chest, his head ducking to kiss her thoroughly while she was dimly aware of moving backwards until her legs hit the edge of his bed.

“Don’t forget, just say the word little swan.” Clint broke the kiss and looked at her seriously.

“If you’re planning on being between my thighs shouldn’t you be calling me by my name?” She was aiming for teasing, but the words came out more breathless sounding than anything.

“Okay, Bella.”

The way he said her name should be illegal Bella thought, and she pushed up on her toes to kiss him again, moaning softly when his hand twisted in her hair, holding her against his lips.

Her last coherent thought was that she really was going to spontaneously combust.

~*~Fin~*~

Notes:

My first attempt at Marvel, so be gentle please lol

Big thanks to Harley (Harleen Frances Quinzel) this probably wouldn’t have been finished without you

I don’t have a beta so any mistakes are my own

I may add a second part to this, depending on interest and whether I can get my nerve up to actually write a lemon again lol

Have previously published this fic & others under the name Cuinawen on FFnet & AO3, as well as on Wordpress

#fanfic #marvel fanfiction #clint barton fanfiction #bella swan #clint barton/bella swan #marvel/twilight #avengers fluff #avengers fanfiction #clint barton needs love

[simsadventures]

After All: Chapter 15: Paying a Visit

Summary: The Compound is under attack and you feel that Bucky is somehow involved, involuntarily as it may. And then you see why you had such feeling

Warnings: angst, violence, blood, death, swearing

Word Count: 2364

A/N: Long time no see. I missed writing this so much. Hope you’ll enjoy this chapter, as angsty and awful as it is. Let me know what you thought.

Series Masterlist __ Masterlist

< Previous Chapter

The room was dead quiet. Everyone was thinking and the only sound to be heard in the space was Tony’s desperate clicking a tapping on the screen. But all seemed to no avail. The jet was lost, and nobody really knew if it landed safely, at least, or if it was in the bottom of the ocean. Everyone, of course, hoped for the first version to be right, but deep down, everyone feared that it might not.

Your logical brain was telling you a thing you couldn’t ignore. If anyone was as skilled and determined to actually get on board of the jet with Bucky, knowing Bucky’s history, and all of that, they would have to be extremely stupid to let the plane and Bucky aka the Winter Soldier crash with it. You didn’t like this possibility at all, but at least it meant that Bucky was still alive, even if in a very different mode than you were used to seeing him.

But that didn’t matter to you one bit. As long as he was alive, there were still things you could try and get the programming out of his mind. You would give anything to at least know if he was genuinely unharmed, and that you could think of the next steps. Not that you would be the only one. Tony could dislike the guy however he wanted, but he still acknowledged that Bucky was part of the team and he wouldn’t sleep until he knew what the hell was going on.

Suddenly, there was a loud beep, coming from one of Tony’s screens. Head of every person in the room snapped towards the sound, and you all waited intently for what that meant. Tony squinted his eyes.

“What is it, Tony?” Steve rumbled, unable to take the silence.

“The systems are telling me that the jet has been made visible again.”

“Well, that’s a good thing, right?” You asked, but when nobody answered you, the sickening feeling in your stomach even worsened.

“Somebody had to switch it on, which only tells me that they knew that we were looking for it.”

“Can you see where the jet is?” Natasha asked calmly, even if all she wanted to do was yell at everyone to do something, that they needed to get Bucky back safe. He was her friend, knowing what she went through and their talks were almost therapeutic for her, and for her own selfish reasons, she couldn’t afford to lose him.

“That’s the weird part, the systems show that the jet is… here.” As soon as Tony said that, the lights went out.

You would’ve gasped, but you didn’t even have time to do that. The sound of glass shattering all around you made your mind to shut up, and then there were the sirens squealing and shouting, telling you that there was a danger. Duh. You already knew that. You had to idea what to do. Bucky taught you few things to be able to defend yourself, but those seemed to have vanished from your brain. All that was left was sheer panic.

You could see movement all around you. Nobody had their armours on them, and they were at their most vulnerable. To get to the wing with apartments would time they didn’t have.

It was as if somebody kicked your ass when you realised that your lab was the closest room with at least some of their equipment, however unfinished they were.

There were much more people in the room than you remembered. You could see people in all black (or at least you assumed it was all black, you couldn’t be too sure due to the darkness in the room and outside, the only light coming from some flashlights) fighting the team. You were still on the couch, and nobody paid you any mind. You swiftly stood up, trying to be invisible.

You could see Sam looking your way, and you just showed him by a movement of your hand that you were getting out. He nodded and ran to your aid, being your bodyguard on the way.

You knew you didn’t have to worry about Tony, because his new suit would fly to him in any second. Just as you thought of it, you could see various parts swishing around you. You and Sam ran out of the office and before Sam could say anything, you yelled.

“I need to get to my lab. I have some of your things there. You can’t fight with the few handguns Tony has in his office.”

Sam sins waste time by answering you, but he made his way down the corridor, finding your lab, and letting you pick all of the stuff that could come in handy. You knew you couldn’t fight in hand to hand combat, so grabbed a gun you created with Tony. It was something like a smart gun, making a sharpshooter out of any Jane or John.

When you had everything you felt like you needed, you turned around and wanted to run out when a figure appeared in the door. By the look of it, even with the tactical gear on, you could guess that the person standing there was a woman. And when she chuckled, you were more than sure that it was a girl indeed, and one that you already knew.

Sam stood in front of you, ready to protect you. He had more than enough guns now to be able to do so.

“I wanted to take you down myself, bitch. You and your whiny ass caused me a lot of trouble, you know that? If it hadn’t been for your big mouth, I would have gotten him to work for us a lot sooner.” Hannah spoke up and if looks could kill, well, let’s just say she’d be flying out of the window.

Sam had enough of her “bad guy talk” and lurched at her, tackling her down. What he didn’t expect was for her to have a taser in her hand, pressing it against his abdomen, getting rid of him in one swift movement.

“What are you talking about, Hannah? Work who for whom?”

She laughed again, and you now wanted to gauge her eyes out with the bluntest object in the history of the world.

“You guys really thought you could take Hydra down so easily? Sure, you destroyed most of the members, but some of them survived, and they created this new agency. We call ourselves the Revengers, you know, taking our revenge on the Avengers, who are what is wrong with the world. And we used the most powerful weapon to take you down. Would you like to guess as to what this weapon is?”

You just whispered Bucky, and she smirked.

“He is the perfect soldier if you think of it. Our mission is to destroy all of the Avengers and everyone associated with them, and the Winter Soldier has all the information about all of you guys in his mind. We just had to configure his mind so that he would like to listen to what we had to say. If it’s gonna make you feel better, I think he was thinking of you when we were making the Soldier of him again.”

There were tears in your eyes now, threatening to escape the confines of your eyes. But you wouldn’t let them. And you wouldn’t let this bitch have the upper hand. Sam was still groaning on the floor, and you were pretty sure that the rest of the team and the alerted agents had enough of their own problems. Hannah was nearing you, probably thinking you were completely helpless and you’d be an easy target for her. You might not have been a trained assassin, but you would still go down fighting, at least.

She obviously wanted to have her hands on you when she killed you, and that was her gravest mistake. She reached for your throat and started choking you with all her might, you grabbed the gun that was in your left back pocket, and shot her shoulder. That was as high as your arm would go in that short amount of time before she knew what was happening.

She hissed and let you go, letting you run away from her and out of the room. The equipment was still snugged in a black bag, and you sprinted across the hall to get to where you last saw the team. Some of them were still there, you could see Wanda, Clint and Natasha. Tony was most probably outside, taking out all those who would like to come in uninvited, and Steve was possibly helping him.

You yelled at Nat, who turned her head just in time to see two specially modified guns just for her. She grabbed them mid-air and started firing away. You did the same with Clint, giving him a brand new bow and arrows. They both nodded at you gratefully and went back to destroying the attackers. From the corner of your eye, you could see another person coming in the room.

You turned around only to see Bucky strutting towards Natasha, who seemed to be utterly oblivious to her friend marching towards her. You wanted to yell and let her know, but before you could do so, she kicked the guy in front of her in the chest, sending him tumbling and flying down the shattered window. Then she ducked just in time to miss Bucky’s metal fist, and she quickly stood up to kick him the balls and giving him a few good measured punches.

What she didn’t see coming was a rolling bomb stopping right between her and Bucky. She tried to jump away, just like Bucky, who was however much more successful in doing so. The explosion sent Natasha out of the same window through which she threw many of the attackers. You let out a high pitched shriek seeing your friend disappearing in the pitch-black darkness outside. But Clint was faster than thought. He jumped after Natasha, but when you wanted to go and check if they were both alright, a heavy arm on your shoulder stopped you.

You didn’t even want to turn around because you knew you’d have to face the man you were slowly falling in love with, only to find him not recognising you.

He didn’t care about your plans and turned you around, grabbing you by your throat again. You didn’t know what it was with people and your throat.

The cold metal fingers were digging in the skin of your neck, and despite how much you wanted to run away, your limbs were not even protesting. This was Bucky. Your Bucky.

“Bucky,” you wheezed, getting his attention. His face was as solid as a rock, staring blankly back at you. But at least you had his attention and you would take anything.

“It’s me. Y/N. Remember me?”

His face was unmoving, but the grip wasn’t getting tighter, so that was something. Ok, Y/N, think. Tell him something to remember.

“You know me, Bucky. You sleep in my room every night, always cuddling the hell out of me, and then telling me that I’m the reason why you’re always late to the morning meetings. We were together in an entertainment park and you loved it. You even won a huge bear for me, that’s now scaring the shit out of both of us at night. And we kissed, and we wanted to do so much more.”

You stopped to look at him and could see confusion all over his face. Good, you were getting to him, at least a little bit. At least till someone came in and gently put him down until you figured out what to do with him.

What you didn’t expect was a sharp knife pressing in your side, not stopping until it slid inside you. You gasped, almost fainting from the intense pain you were feeling. You looked him in the eye, and he was as determined as he was when he first came in.

“I don’t know you,” he said stubbornly, but you could still make out the glimpse of uncertainty in his eyes.

“You know me, James. You know me better than anyone else. But it’s ok, I’m just sorry you have to hear the words like this. I think I’m in love with you, Bucky, and I hope you’ll wake up soon enough so that I could really tell you all about how I feel.”

“Nobody loves me. I’m the Winter Soldier!” He now screamed at you. But you didn’t even flinch. He was still holding you, but now rather than choking you, he was helping you stand because thou were starting to feel a little dizzy.

You reached for his face, and even though he slightly protested, he let you rest your hands on his cheeks. You caressed them and tried to transfer as much of your love into that touch. There were still the little sparks when you touched his skin, and you hoped that he was feeling it as well.

You could see the gash was now leaking more and more blood, your head growing lighter and lighter by each passing second. Bucky could have easily finished you off, but your touch and your soft tone, they didn’t make sense to him Soldier brain. He was a war machine, no feelings, nothing.

But you. His fuzzy brain was trying to tell him something important, he could feel it, but he just couldn’t focus properly. He could then feel himself grabbing the knowledge when a scream interrupted him.

He turned around in time to see Steve’s fist flying to his chest, and because both his hands were on your body, he couldn’t shield himself. He let you go, and you immediately fell to the ground, groaning in pain.

You couldn’t concentrate on anything. You could see people fighting next to you, but that was about as much as you could pay attention to.

You felt as sleep was taking over your senses, and the last thought on your mind was if Bucky would be ok.

/ Next Chapter >

After All:

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#bucky barnes #bucky #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #james bucky barnes #bucky barnes imagine #james buchanan barnes #avengers #avengers fanfiction #marvel #mcu #mcu fanfiction #angst #the winter soldier #the winter solider fanfiction #the winter solider x reader #the winter solider imagine #the white wolf

[starkerkeyz]

Gateway: The Path to Happiness

Keyz 💖: This rp is LONG and so fun💕 Queen keeps me on track and focused (ง'̀-‘́)ง this is post IM1 so Tony is a young broken baby and Peter is going to save him💖

Queen 💓: I really hope everyone likes it! It is very long and very hard to edit. Credit to @the-mad-starker for doing almost all of the editing, we couldn’t have done it without you!

AO3 Link

Warnings: Alcoholism, self harm, Discussion of past abuse, trauma from past abuse, Obie is the abuse, Tony is a hot mess, ABO, omega/omega, intersex omega

Tony sways as he walks and takes another swig from the bottle clutched in his hand. He doesn’t even bother to hide it behind a trite little paper bag like the nice beta at the 24 hour convenience store had offered. Tony doesn’t care if people know he’s wasted. He doesn’t care if he’s arrested, either. His lips curl up, a snarl behind glass.

Let them try. 

He’s quickly nearing the end of the street he’s on. Just by the corner, only separated from the main road by one measly building, a tiny alleyway housing some other late night drifter leaning against the cold brick. 

Tony thinks nothing of it until the scent of alpha hits his nose like a punch, and he almost lifts a hand to check under his nostrils for blood from the force of it. He’s, at once, filled with longing, the loneliness of an abandoned omega roaring up out of him like a tsunami. In equal measure, a cold fury sweeps down from his ringing ears and his grip on the bottle turns into firm claws. 

Something feral and wild prowls behind the arc reactor and makes Tony’s pupils blow out, neck prickling and hot. 

He remembers the feel of Obie’s hands on his nape. The paralysis of the omegan sweet spot being taken advantage of; held down and kept there while his clothing was removed. For the arc reactor, Tony. But that hadn’t stopped him from pawing Tony’s chest, either. Gloating about how much money Tony had made him on the black market while he did it. 

Fuck alphas.

The Alpha looks up, taking a deep breath, opening his mouth and tastes the omega scent, distressed and abandoned omega. He grins as he surveys the omega walking forward towards him, and he sees the alcohol in the omegas hand. He’s never seen an easier target, drunk and craving an alpha. “Hey, Baby,” the alpha calls, pushing off the wall. He strides towards the omega, “How about you, me, and that bottle go have some fun?”

Tony lowers the bottle from his mouth and tries not to make it obvious he’s holding it ready. He plasters on a sloppy smile and waves his hand, dismissing the alpha and moving to walk past.

“Not interested, buddy,” he grumbles, shoulders rising up to his ears and making him even angrier. The smell of alpha makes his knees feel weak; he doesn’t stop moving forward. Obie was a bastard and so is this guy.

The Alpha is a little surprised by the reaction. Normally, lonely abandoned omegas fall at your feet at the slightest notice, just to have an alpha pay attention to them for a few minutes. It’s what every part of their body and minds crave. 

This one though seems angry. That isn’t a problem. “That’s a pity baby,” the alpha purrs. 

He steps to the side, letting the omega pass, before stepping close and grabbing the nape of the omega’s neck and gripping tightly. 

“But we can have you feeling good, anyway. I was just out for a smoke, baby, let’s go inside and I’ll show you a real good time. You’ll forget about your old alpha and being angry real soon,” he coos.

Tony goes for a swing, having expected something but he’s been trying to convince himself not all alphas are bad (he’s wrong, so wrong, this is wrong) and he’s too slow. His arm drops, fingers going limp.

The bottle falls down to the ground and shatters, beer spackling the pavement and cement along with dark brown shards of glass. 

Tony can’t even flinch away. 

The alpha wraps his other arm around the pretty omega’s waist, hand sliding over his hoodie to feel the body underneath. 

“Mmm, Omega, we are going to have so much fun,” he growls, voice low and full of lust. “Gonna make you scream, baby, and don’t worry, I like my omegas with a little bit of fight.” He roughly pulls Tony towards a doorway, grinning.

“Bet you have a lovely pussy, baby. Wonder how wet you’ll be already given how much you crave an alpha, poor little thing.” A foot connects with the back of the alpha’s knees and they buckle. He yelps and lets go of the omega. As soon as he does, he turns to try and see the attacker and gets punched in the face. He stumbles back and sees a slender omega who, at once, puts himself between him and the first omega. 

The omega growls and the alpha growls back. He goes to punch the omega who ducks out of the way and swings at him. Then everything goes black.

Tony stumbles back, going for the neck of the broken bottle without thinking about what’s going on behind him. 

He grabs the neck, shallowly cutting his fingers and palm in the process as he snatches the broken glass in his clumsy post-paralysis grip.  By the time he turns back around, his attacker is knocked out.

Tony blinks rapidly.  

The newcomer smells like another omega but he overpowered that alpha like it’s nothing. He isn’t sure what to do. His hand stings but he isn’t about to drop his only means of defense. He doesn’t want to turn his back when his nape still throbs with the memory of that asshole’s grip.

“Who are you?” Tony starts off, shifting his weight from foot to foot, swaying more than intended as the alcohol fights for control over his faculties. The omega kicks the alpha to check if he’s really out cold before turning to the alpha’s victim. He can smell the loneliness and he can see the alcohol, too. He’s very glad to have gotten there in time. He gives the other omega a gentle smile. 

“I’m Peter.” His eyes flick to the weapon the omega holds. “How about you put that down. You’re hurting yourself. I’ve got bandages, how about I help you stop the bleeding and get you to a taxi?” he suggests. 

“N-no. No, thanks. I’m fine.” Tony takes a step back even though it hurts to leave such an invitation behind. 

He can’t trust anyone. He can’t even trust himself. 

He wants to stay so badly…

That’s why he’s gotta leave. He can’t stay. He should be heading home, Obie will want to know-

Oh. Well.

Tony stops and looks down at his hand where his knuckles have gone white over the broken brown glass. It makes the red rivulets of his blood stand out vividly in the dim lighting. 

He doesn’t have an alpha anymore. He doesn’t even want one. But what does he do with himself without one?

Peter knows just how scared and instinctive omegas are in this kind of state and he inches forward and lets out a gentle calming scent, the kind you use to calm children. 

“It’s okay, you can trust me. I know you must be really scared, but I have had that happen to me, and I really do just want to make sure you get home safe, and you don’t hurt yourself.” He pauses and offers the omega a hand palm up. 

“I’m Peter Parker, what’s your name?”

“Tony." 

Tony doesn’t offer his last name. His hand spasms on the bottle and shatters it further, splintering the glass. He sees the cuts and slivers but doesn’t feel a thing. 

He drops the useless bundle of shards at his feet and then drops his hand at his side like his injuries mean nothing. 

"I’m not going to hurt myself,” he says as if he isn’t bleeding onto the street. 

He furrows his brows, petulant and feverish with conflicting emotions and cravings. He could still smell alpha pheromones in his nose and feel the hot, dirty clamp of alpha fingers on his omegan weak spot. 

“How is an underage twink supposed to help an adult with adult problems, anyhow?” Tony snarls meanly, trying to hurt, to lash out and cut off any attempts to get closer. Trying to cover up his pulse starting to kick and scream frantically behind the reactor. 

“You’re gonna make me do things I don’t wanna do. I don’t. Wanna. I don't…” Tony blinks, slow and furious with himself. He snarls at nothing. Then he looked at the other omega with naked longing, vulnerable and glassy-eyed and wanting so much. “I don’t wanna be alone.”

Peter nods encouragingly.

“I’m 25 and I know no omega wants to be alone after an alpha tried that. You won’t be, I’m here,” he promises, stepping a little closer as he continues to hold his arm outstretched. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want. Let’s just go a street over, away from this alpha. And then, if you want, I’ll sit with you, or take you home, or stop the bleeding, I promise,” he says softly. “I know everything is scary right now, but it’s going to be okay. I’m an omega just like you, and we look after each other.”

“Nobody looks after me,” Tony tries to say it meanly, to say it through his teeth, but it comes out more broken and tender than the split skin of his fingers. 

He scowls at himself for showing vulnerability and shakes his head, angry and hurting but not retreating anymore. 

“I look after me. The people who look after me. My alpha…” Tony’s eyes go far away. He slowly comes back to himself with a shake and looks at Peter, shoulders pulling in to make himself small. He’s so alone. “I don’t have an alpha anymore, Peter. He wasn’t a good alpha. But he was mine? And now I'm… alone. I look after me.”

Peter nods. 

“I know, it’s awful being left alone like you don’t matter, but omegas always try to look after each other, because we understand each other in a way alphas never could. I know what it feels like to be abandoned by an alpha, but the things that helped me were my omega friends.” He steps closer. 

“It’s hard to trust, Tony. I know that but you only have to trust me a little bit, for a little while, just till we get you home,” he says softly. He reaches out and takes his uninjured hand. “Just for a little bit, I’ll look after you.”

“I don't…” Tony looks down to where the other omega is holding his hand. 

He can feel that more clearly than whatever dull throbbing ache he’s done to his other hand. He looks up at Peter and wants to stop fighting. 

“You’ll take care of me?” Tony’s voice is as small as it’s ever been. He’s scared to move; not even to lace their fingers together. 

What if Peter leaves him like Obie did?

Peter smiles and nods.

“Yes, I will, Tony. It’s going to be okay. How about we go away from this horrible alpha?” he suggests gently. “I’ve got bandages in my bag, and I can help some of the pain go,” he coaxes. He steps back and gently tugs on Tony’s hand. 

“I’ll take care of you,” he promises. “Come on, omega, we will have you home and safe soon.”

Tony goes along with the other omega, forgetting about his hand and the glass and the alpha and Obie. Peter has such a nice smile. Tony doesn’t want to think about the rest if he doesn’t have to. 

He doesn’t meet the other omega’s eyes but he does weave their fingers together, holding on tight in the dark. 

Peter guides the omega to a bench the next road over. He lets go of the omega’s hand to take his backpack off and get a first aid kit out. He then gently takes Tony’s hand.

“Let’s see, ow, that must hurt,” he murmurs letting out a soothing scent. “Let me get that glass out.” Peter gets some tweezers and starts gently getting the glass out. 

“You’re being so good, omega. Good boy,” he murmurs sweetly. He gives him a big smile. “That’s all of it out. I have to disinfect it now though. It’s going to hurt but you’re going to be a brave boy for me, aren’t you?”

Tony doesn’t even care that this kid is calling him boy like that. It makes his insides kinda squirmy. Maybe the alcohol is making him nauseous. 

“It doesn’t hurt,” Tony responds honestly. He watches Peter tend to his injuries dispassionately, eyes hooded. He reaches over and grabs one of Peter’s hands with his free one. “I can feel you, though. You’re warm.”

Peter rubs Tony’s good hand for a few seconds before pulling away to get the disinfectant. He wipes several times.

“That’s it, well done. You’ve been so good,” he murmurs with a smile. 

Tony is still bleeding and Peter carefully wraps the hand in a bandage. He then takes both hands in his.

“There, all good. It’s better now, omega. A taxi will come soon and then you can get home and in bed. Won’t that be nice? Maybe you can make yourself a nice nest?” He suggests gently.

“No.” Tony takes both hands back and puts them in the pockets of his hoodie. He moves to get off the bench and walk away altogether, shoulders hunched against rejection and cutting himself off preemptively. 

“No nests. My alpha…” Tony pauses, stuck in his autopilot with an interrupted subroutine. He doesn’t have an alpha. “I’ll sleep. Somewhere. But not in a nest. Good night.”

Peter’s heart aches for the omega. Was he not allowed nests?

“Of course, you can sleep wherever you want, Tony,” he says, stepping forward towards him. “You are an omega who looks after themselves, but why don’t you wait for the taxi? You said I was warm. You must be cold. Walking home won’t be nice. The taxi will be here real soon and then you can get home and have a good sleep.” He pauses. “I promise you’ll soon wonder why you ever missed an alpha when being by yourself can be wonderful.”

“I don’t know about that,” Tony whispers. He ducks his head and looks at his shoes for a moment. Then he turns back around and comes close to Peter again, still not making eye contact. 

“But I’ll stay. For the taxi,” Tony murmurs softly. His hand still doesn’t hurt but he thinks maybe it aches, being alone. 

Peter gives him a big bright beaming smile. 

“That’s good, Tony,” he says. He gently takes both hands and stands a little closer, thumbs stroking his hand soothingly. 

“You know what helped me when I was alone?” He asks, “After a bit, I broke the rules the alpha had laid down and that helped me feel a little better.”

“My alpha would have pinched me for being out so late.” Nothing worse, because Tony would have complained and someone would have seen, but those hateful little corrective pinches to his sides and ass were humiliating. 

Tony whines, distressed, shifting from foot to foot again like he’s thinking of running for it as soon as Peter lets go of him. 

Peter’s heart throbs in sympathy. He steps forward and pulls Tony into a firm hug. Arms strong around him like an alpha’s would be. 

“He won’t do that anymore, because you’re not alone. You’re free,” he promises, hands rubbing Tony’s back soothingly. “Right now, it feels bad but when you shake off the physical craving then you’re free and it’s wonderful, I promise it is, Omega.”

Tony shudders and clutches at the other omega, fingers digging in too tight as wetness threatens to spill past his lashes. Peter smells so sweet and soft and sincere. Tony wishes it was real. He wishes he deserved nice things. 

The taxi pulls up before Tony can break down any further.

Tony jerks back like he’s been stung. He stumbles away before he can make even more of an ass of himself, mumbling a tiny thanks to Peter without looking at him. He heads towards the taxi with the scent of blooming happiness being snuffed out and replaced by uncertainty and shame. 

“See you around, Peter.”

Peter opens the taxi door for Tony and waits for him to clamber in. He then pulls out a business card. 

‘Gateway-The door to a new world

Peter Parker’ 

It then lists a business email and phone number. Peter pulls a pen out and writes his personal number on the back and gives it to Tony. He leans in and kisses his cheek. 

“Feel free to call me anytime, okay?” He says softly. “You seem like a great person I’d like to get to know.”

Peter steps back and shuts the door and waves as the taxi leaves. 

Tony looks at the card and thinks about tearing it up. He doesn’t deserve someone as nice as Peter. Obie wouldn’t want him to keep this card… 

Tony slides it into the back pocket of his jeans and rests his head against the taxi window. 

—

“Wake up, Tony." 

Tony rolls off the couch with a flail, shouting at nothing and landing on his bandaged hand for his troubles. He winces, standing up with his hands cradled to his stomach protectively. 

"I don’t want to know where you’ve been or what you did to your hand. Just please take a shower and go to that meeting like you promised me, okay?” Pepper means well but she’s not his alpha and her presence so close when he’s so unbalanced is more stress than relief to his omegan senses. 

“I will, I will. I’m up. It’s at 2? I’ve got hours.” Tony shuffles to the bathroom. He can’t turn his back, even on Pepper. 

“Tony, it’s noon and the place is 45 minutes away. Please let Happy take you.” It’s so he’ll let her know when Tony arrives. He’s used to being monitored and kept track of this way. 

“Sure thing, Pep." 

She leaves. 

Tony takes a piss but doesn’t return to the bathroom. He pours himself a morning glass of whiskey and nurses that in place of showering or brushing his teeth. 

He feels the little card in his back pocket - didn’t change his clothing from last night- sitting on the couch and in the car. He doesn’t pull it out until he’s all the way at the meeting, alone and afraid and trying to remember Peter’s smile. It’s for reassurance and it leaves him feeling like a dumbass for hoping a little card could or would help. 

"Stupid. Why am I even trying…” Tony murmurs to the card, leg bouncing, bandages stark and obvious and ugly. He’s a mess. A wreck of a human and a disaster of an omega. No wonder Obie tried selling him for sex.

—

Peter is helping set up chairs with MJ and Wanda when people start to enter the room. This is a meeting that isn’t run by Gateway but by going as clients, there is a Gateway presence there, one that the organizers love because of how the three of them give the other omegas hope. 

He’s just finished when out of the corner of his eye he sees… Tony? He turns and sees Tony standing in the doorway in the same clothes from yesterday. Oh, the poor thing. He waves, smiling widely.

Tony enters the room, looking around for a quiet corner to stand and hide in, but then he sees Peter. He is hit with the sudden urge to move closer to him and enjoy his company and also to move farther away because fuck, he hasn’t changed clothing and he brushed his teeth with whiskey this morning afternoon. 

Maybe other people could tell, but Peter would know.  Anyway, Peter’s accompanied by another pretty omega closer to his age and Tony isn’t sure if he’s even welcome. 

He flushes in humiliation but waves back. He hovers around the proceedings without looking at the other omega, getting in everyone’s way with his slow shuffling in and out of their paths, swaying gently from booze and lack of good sleep.

Peter can see the others omega’s embarrassment in the way he quickly looks away and awkwardly walks around the room but Peter strides over.

“Tony, it’s good to see you.” 

Tony seems very responsive to contact so Peter greets him traditionally, kissing his cheek.

“It’s especially good to see you here, Tony. Do you want to sit by me?” He asks. “If you need it, you can always tap me and we can go take a little break.”

“It’s okay. If you want to stay with your friend.” 

Tony isn’t nearly as drunk or out of his wits as he was last night. He still finds himself leaning into Peter’s space, craving the contact and attention with a bone-deep need that he wishes he could smother and repress.

“I didn’t think I’d see you again. Especially not… like this.” He sprayed himself with something expensive and nice but is it enough to cover the smell of his self-loathing and depression? 

He shouldn’t have come. Peter will think he’s- well, Peter will know he’s a terrible person to associate with, now. So much for that little card being helpful. 

Peter would probably hang up on him now. 

He’s just being polite to Tony.

Peter gives him a smile.

“MJ and Wanda are fine on their own, probably already making new friends,” he jokes. 

Peter takes the bandage free hand. He feels a deep sympathy at the way Tony smells and looks. He’s clearly falling apart at the seams, poor thing. Peter will help him though.

“Let’s sit together. Don’t worry, I promise the meetings aren’t too bad and you don’t have to speak if you don’t want to.”

“You’re the nicest person I’ve met, Peter Parker.” 

Tony might be drunker than he thought. He lets the younger omega guide him to their seats. He, thankfully, takes a spot that’s a little away from the others, a small oasis of a chair or two of space between Tony and any other omega besides Peter. He relaxes, turning his shoulders towards Peter and feeling light enough to exhale and smile.

“Thanks, by the way. I think I dove into the taxi too fast to say it last night.” He squeezes Peter’s hand. He’s reluctant to let go. Peter is the only familiar face amongst the crowd and he smells so comforting and his smile is just as charming and boyish as Tony remembered. He doesn’t want to let go. 

Tony is sweet. Peter can tell he’s scared and feels alone, that he’s been mistreated too, but that inside, he’s the sweetest little omega. It will just take a while to draw it out.

“That’s okay, I’m just glad I helped, Tony.”

The group leader Emma stands up and starts talking. Peter doesn’t drop Tony’s hand, just strokes it with his thumb. He gives Tony an encouraging smile as they go around and introduce themselves. Some people say why they are there, some not.

“Hi, I’m Peter. I’m here because I want to support people who went through the same things I did, to show that you can get through it and get stronger despite the experience.”

All eyes turn to Tony after that and he panics. He can’t do this. He can’t tell them the truth. He can’t.

“I’m- my name is. Tony. And I was assaulted. By an alpha.” He’s lying about why he’s there. He was scheduled to be at this meeting long before the incident last night. Nobody in this room but Peter will know the truth and Tony-

Tony actually trusts him not to call him out on that.

It makes his next words come breathy. His hold on Peter is tight so he doesn’t float away.

“A good Samaritan saved me. It’s the only reason I’m here today.”

Peter knows Tony isn’t being truthful as he references yesterday, but he can also hear some truth in the omega’s words. He’s been assaulted before that. 

He feels the tight grip on his hand and squeezes back. 

They finish up with names and then the group leader has them go around the circle and talk about a time that they overcame fear. Tony stays silent for each round of talking but Peter speaks up every time. 

The whole time he holds Tony’s hands. 

After an hour, the meeting wraps up, and Peter turns to Tony. 

“Perhaps this sounds strange, but would you like me to come home with you to just help you do some normal things? It can be hard to do those things after being abandoned,“ he says quietly.

“You don’t want to see it.” Tony turns into Peter’s space, mirroring his posture and still holding onto his hand. The uncomplicated comfort is nice. The bubble of privacy around them is nice, too.

“You should be doing better things with your time. I have the money to pay people to help me.” Tony rubs his unshaven cheeks ruefully. He has the money for a barber but he won’t go. He’s never letting anyone near his upper body with sharp implements ever again. Not without a repulsor to the face.

Peter gives him a smile.

“I’d like to help, Tony,” he says softly. “How about we go to yours and you take a nice hot shower and shave and I make us some dinner?” 

He leans closer letting out a soft interested scent.

“I’d really like to know how to get to know you better, Tony.” 

“I’m Iron Man,” Tony blurts, like it’s shameful, like Peter will leave him -like Pepper, like Obie, like his parents- and he runs a hand through his hair, breathing out harshly. He looks at Peter through his lashes, shoulders rounding for a blow.

“My name is Tony Stark. I’m… I’m too old to be this fucked up, kid. You don’t want to get to know me better. I’m really, really not worth it.” 

Tony should have waited until after he had home-cooked food to deliver this news. Then again, hiding his huge home and fleet of cars and name brand everything would have probably been impossible. 

Well, it’s better to get this out of the way so he can absorb this let down with some rum and coke for dinner when Happy gets him home after this.

This statement piques Peter’s interest but he gives no indication that that is the case. He smiles at Tony and squeezes his hand. 

“That doesn’t matter to me. I still want to help no matter how much money you have, so do you want my help?” He asks softly. 

"I–. Yeah.” Tony can’t believe this kid. For someone able to knock out a horny alpha with ease, he’s only ever been soft to Tony. It makes Tony’s skin prickle warmly and that light floaty feeling comes back. 

“Some things you can’t buy, I’m offering one of those,” Peter says with a soft smile. 

“You can come back to mine. I have a driver but we can take your car or a taxi or- whatever.” Just don’t leave me goes unspoken but rings loud and pathetic in Tony’s ears. 

Peter gives him a kind loving smile.

“My friends carpooled, so we go with your driver. Don’t worry,” he soothes. “I just need to go and tell them.” 

He stands and leads Tony over to MJ and Wanda.

“Guys, this is Tony. We’re going to go and chill at his place,” he explains. 

MJ gives him an up and down and then nods.

“Okay, see ya,” she says. 

Wanda smiles, “Night, Pete!” Peter gently leads Tony out of the hall. 

“You got any food in the fridge or do we need to pick up some?”

“Probably should pick some up.” 

Tony only knows what alcohol he has on hand at any given moment. There are snacks everywhere but as far as real food goes, he only eats that at work when people are watching. 

“Or we could get burgers on the way back.” 

His comfort food. A good, greasy burger to absorb all the toxins from his body and flush his cheeks with warmth. Obie used to pinch him for loving burgers so much. 

Peter sees the light in Tony’s eyes when he talks about burgers, and he smiles.

“If you’d like that then we can do that, Tony,” he promises with a soft smile, “I’ll just make you some nice tea at home.” Peter guides Tony down the hall and out into the cold.

“When is your driver getting here?” he asks. “And where would you like to get burgers?”

“Happy should be just around the corner.” Tony doesn’t think about it as he leans into Peter’s touch, taking his phone out and texting for his beta friend and driver. He’s too excited about the idea of burgers with another person to think about how skin hungry he’s acting.

“We can get some from this place near my house. It’s a hole in the wall but so good. I’ll pay.” Tony finds his words ramping up the more excited he gets. He hasn’t had a burger with a friend in. A while. 

And Peter’s his friend… right?

Peter smiles as the car pulls up and they get in together. The driver gives him a look in the mirror but doesn’t comment. 

Tony rambles, clearly nervous about the hole in the wall and going there in the past with his friend, Rhodey. Peter smiles and listens, thumb stroking the back of his hand reassuringly. When they get there and get out of the car and join the queue, Peter stands close so their arms press against each other.

“I love burgers,” he tells Tony, grinning.

Tony moves closer and closer the more Peter smiles and doesn’t push him away. He’s really missed this. 

Obie never touched him, he wasn’t Tony’s alpha, sexually, but the loss of his scent and even the contact of those damn pinches left him feeling raw and exposed. 

Peter’s skin against him makes him feel settled and warm and he wants to keep this feeling going for as long as he can. He’s forgotten about wearing yesterday’s clothing or basic social norms and is nearly climbing into Peter’s back pocket in his eagerness by the time they get to the register and order. And Peter still isn’t pushing him away!

“We can eat at my place. I’ll shower and get cleaned up for you.” Tony puts his arm around Peter’s shoulders, wanting to cuddle and holding back. 

Peter loves how Tony is so tactile, already craving his touch. And the way he says he’ll do things for Peter. He’s the sweetest little thing. 

Peter kisses his cheek and puts his arm around Tony’s waist.

“That sounds wonderful, Tony. Just got to wait for our order then, go together!”

Tony preens under the attention. He ducks in and rubs his cheek against Peter’s, quick and shy, scenting him like it means nothing and ignoring the blush on his cheeks. 

Tony pays and they pick up their order not long after. Tony holds the food and opens the door for Peter, not letting him lift a finger. 

Tony feels giddy enough to do it again at the car door, smiling widely at Peter, and letting him in first. Pepper doesn’t like it when Tony showers her with affection like this but Peter isn’t pushing Tony away and so Tony can’t seem to stop wanting to get closer. 

Helen Cho has warned him about alpha withdrawal but that couldn’t be why he feels so at ease around Peter… could it? He isn’t an alpha…

Peter is surprised when Tony scents him. For such a nervous skittish thing, he has warmed up to Peter very, very fast. Then he holds the doors open like a sweet gentleman and Peter gives him a big smile.

“Do you want me to eat with you now? Or after my shower?” Tony chatters away to cover his insecurities, tugging Peter along now they’re in his territory. 

He, kind of, doesn’t want to separate from the other omega. Would it be weird if Peter comes into the bathroom with him? But then, he’d see the arc reactor, so nevermind, forget that mood killer. Tony will stay fully clothed around the other omega at all times. Peter reaches out and gently strokes his cheek. “Tony, you go shower and I’ll get out plates and get us something nice to drink. It will feel really nice to get all clean, and then, you can put on nice, fresh clothes, something soft, okay?”

“Soft. Right.” He could do that. And then Peter might smile and say he’s done good. The thought makes Tony’s stomach flip and twist.

Tony rubs his cheek against surprisingly long fingers, eyes going lidded and glassy for a moment at the rush of pure endorphins. He blinks slowly; nods even slower.

“Okay, Peter. I’ll go do that. You won’t get bored? I can make it quick. I can leave the door unlocked?” Tony’s anxiety starts pulling him back down from wherever he’s floated off to. 

If Peter’s gone when he gets back from his shower then he’ll be heartbroken. 

Tony is so so so vulnerable that Peter is surprised there isn’t anyone in his life living with him to help him. Just Peter’s wrist near his nose has his eyes glazing over. But he’s such an anxious thing, scared of being left alone. Peter steps close and draws Tony into a hug, guiding the omega’s nose to his neck.

“I’ll be here, Tony. It’s all okay,” he coos.

Tony nuzzles into the offered skin. He moans softly, full of need and longing, and clings onto Peter tightly. He feels so much building up under his skin from years of being pushed down too low for Obie to reach. Feelings and cravings and cracks in his armor he’s had to hide. 

Tony exhales the weight of it all and nearly cries from how easily Peter holds him up. 

The kid’s a miracle. 

“Sorry. Sorry. I’ll go shower. You’re not a teddy bear or a therapist.” Tony backs off abruptly, his limit hit and tolerance too low for any more touchy-feely things without the ease of alcohol. He gestures to the kitchen and dining area, cheeks and neck red. “Have at it. I’ll be back soon.”

Peter watches as Tony leaves the room and heads off through some doors into the bathroom. There's a strong urge to follow, to see what the beautiful touch starved omega would do if he strode in naked and joined him in the shower. Tony is so eager so surely he wouldn't mind...

#keyz writes #keyz rp #starker #omega tony stark #omega peter parker #intersex omega #tw: alcholism #tw: self half #tw: self destructive behavior #tony is not in a good place in this one but peter is helping

[idyllicstarker]

Do you do little peter prompts? Would love some Tony comforting a sad Peter after a rough day.

I do!! Little Peter is adorable, but it was my first time writing it, so I’m sorry if it’s not the best. I hope you like it!

Warnings: Little!Peter, Daddy!Tony, ddlb

Bad days don’t last forever. 

This was the mentality Peter had been trying to uphold since he woke up this morning. But  as the day just continued to get worse, it was getting a lot harder and Peter didn’t know if he had the willpower to cope. 

It started as soon as he got out of bed. Some days Peter would just feel down and on these days the easiest way to make himself feel better was to slip into his little space and be with Tony, so that he was able to forget everything that was going on around him. Yet Peter was in high school; he had responsibilities, work to do, and an education to gain, so it was never that easy. 

Waking up in such a vulnerable head space set the tone for the rest of the day. The moment something went wrong it would only upset Peter further. And of course, today was the day everything decided to go wrong. 

Flash was being his usual irritable self but for some reason he decided to try and push on Peter’s patience further. He wasn’t violent, but he called him names as Peter trudged past him to get to his locker. They were nothing he wasn’t used to hearing: ‘Slut, whore, cock sucker, Penis Parker’ but today they just hit Peter that little bit harder. As he moved to swap his books out of his locker, he wiped the tears from his eyes letting out a shaky breath. Just a few more hours and then he could be in daddy’s, no, Tony’s arms - he couldn’t afford to slip here, if anyone noticed he’d never hear the end of it. 

It also seemed like every teacher had suddenly turned against Peter overnight. In second period he was yelled at for not paying enough attention. The shouting hurt his ears, and the embarrassment left him feeling sick, but most of all, it was only a reminder that he wasn’t good enough. One of fragile Peter’s most prominent insecurities. It was only further developed when in third period, he found out he’d failed his last biology test. Sure, everyone failed sometimes, but Peter had tried so hard with this one. He’d revised until his eyes were red and sore and he had been positive he was going to pass it at least.

He ended up not eating lunch because the teacher of his class just before kept him behind wanting to talk to him about how he needed to start working hard and not get distracted if he wanted to get into the college  he’d applied for.  But the problem was Peter was working hard, sometimes Tony even said too hard because he never took a break. Peter didn’t know what else he could give, he was already so worn down and tired… and now, he was hungry. Throughout the whole one-sided conversation (basically lecture) Peter sat still, his hands twisting around each other in his lap, his leg shaking up and down nervously and his head bowed. His teacher didn’t seem to notice that Peter was almost on the verge of tears.

There had been more incidents throughout the day but as Peter slowly began to regress beyond his control, he began to block them out. He’d been trying to uphold a conversation with Tony all day over text, but he didn’t want him to know the state that Peter was in knowing it would only worry him.

Finally when the end of the day came, Peter almost sank onto his knees in relief. He wanted his paci, and his stuffie, maybe some dinosaur nuggets and chocolate milk in his bottle. He wanted his warm fluffy onesie with the bunny tail and ears, but most of all he wanted to be cuddled in Tony’s arms.

Ned had offered to walk him home seeing that Peter wasn’t exactly in the most stable of mental states and wanted him to get back safe - Peter had instantly shot down Ned’s idea of him calling Tony to come and get him because he didn’t want to bother the busy man. Knowing reasoning with Peter wasn’t going to work, he just decided to do the next best thing. 

Peter wasn’t quite fully regressed, but he was dazed. The want and need was there, but the motive wasn’t. He couldn’t. It was just a short walk back, one short walk. 

After waving a solemn goodbye to Ned, he entered the tower. The moment he got into the lift, Peter’s resolve broke. He sank to his knees, letting out the softest of sobs, as tears began to fall down his cheeks.

Of course, Tony was standing looking frantic in front of the lift, the moment the doors opened on his floor, having ran at FRIDAY’s announcement that Peter had returned and was in ‘distress, not hurt, just in distress.’ 

The moment he laid eyes on Peter his gaze softened. The boy looked up with the most broken expression, but the relief that washed over his tense body was clear as he realised it was all okay now, he could let go. Tony was here. His head titled very so slightly to the side as he let out a staggered breath.

“Daddy”, he sighed out softly, a slight whine to his tone, a needy one, followed by a soft whimper. 

Tony wasted no time, bending down to remove the burden of his heavy backpack on Peter’s shoulders and slowly lifting him into his arms. “It’s okay sweet pea, daddy’s here now”, he soothed. His tone was gentle and low. And caring, always so caring. Slowly carrying the trembling little from the lift, he placed his backpack down beside the couch knowing Peter wouldn’t be touching anything from that for the rest of the night, and focused on rubbing the boys back genty. Peter instantly sank into Tony’s arms, his own wrapping around his neck and clinging onto him like a koala, legs crossed at the ankles. He didn’t want to let go and that much was obvious. He needed Tony right now, and Tony was more than happy to give himself. 

“There we go baby, everything’s better now. I’ve got you. Just let it all out”, Tony hummed, pressing a kiss to his temple. Peter nodded weakly in response, but didn’t lift his head from where he’d burrowed it into Tony’s neck. He was breathing in his scent, allowing how safe and protected he felt when he smelt it to shield away all the negative stuff that had happened today. 

Tony could feel the wetness on his neck indicating that Peter was still crying. Today must have really been a rough one. He needed attention and care, someone there, it was obvious. 

“Peter sweet pea..”, he whispered gently as he entered the bedroom, not wanting to disturb him from trying to feel better, but knowing the process would be easier if he was fully relaxed and comfortable. Peter let out a small whimper to show he was listening, but still didn’t talk. Tony wasn’t sure if he was at his normal regressed age of five or six, or if all the emotion made him regress further, but either way Tony didn’t mind, he’d still be here for him no matter what. “Let’s get you out of these clothes baby, into something warmer. And then you can cuddle with daddy to your little heart’s content”, he reassured. It was a warning of sorts, knowing Peter would begin to get whine and fidget once Tony set him down. 

And whine and fidget he did - Tony hadn’t even got him onto the bed before Peter began to screech, kicking slightly as he clung onto Tony’s t-shirt. “No daddy, don’t wanna, wants you”, he began to chant, but the guttural sobs his throat was producing made them harder to make sense of. 

“Baby. Baby please, Peter I need to set you down for two seconds so I can grab you some clothes okay? Just two seconds and then If I take any longer I’ll give you extra chocolate as an apology.” Tony was always patient with little Peter knowing it took him longer to fully comprehend his actions. But especially when he was in a needy and clingy state knowing that Peter just wanted to be held when he got like this. Tony had deduced it to the fact that today must have been a pretty bad one, and poor little Peter was traumatised which called for one medicine: Cuddles! But first, he had to get the taking care part out of the way. 

Peter sniffled, his little face scrunched up. His eyelashes were wet with tears and his cheeks and nose flushed scarlet. Slowly but hesitantly he began to let go, swallowing his tears as he nodded slowly. “Bunny..”, he stated softly, and Tony knew exactly what that meant. 

Grabbing the bunny onesie from Peter’s special little wardrobe, he also grabbed a pull up and Peter’s bunny paci to go with the onesie. He was back beside Peter within seconds, pressing a kiss to his cheek and brushing some of his hair from his face. “There we go, such a brave strong boy listening to daddy”, he praised with a gentle smile. Peter let out a watery giggle, happier at the praise. Tony had been the first person to today (apart from maybe his friends) to recognise Peter’s efforts and tell him he was doing well. Of course, the feeling made Peter’s heart swell. 

He cooperated beautifully with Tony as he dressed him, lifting his arms and bum and legs when he was told which of course earned him more praise. Tony never stopped pressing kisses to whatever inch of skin he could get to, and by the time they were done, Peter had stopped crying for good. As Tony handed him his pacifier he eagerly opened his mouth for it, pink lips closing around the nub. A soft moan fell from his lips as he did, it was nothing sexual of course, more of relief than anything. He began to make grabby hands for Tony, and with a soft chuckle, the older man lifted him into his arms. 

“There we go, don’t you just feel better now my sweet bun bun”, he said softly, his hand running over Peters bunny tail to emphasise the nickname as began nuzzling their noses together sweetly. Peter’s lips turned up slightly at the action, a very quiet giggle coming from him. Tony practically grinned hearing it. 

“There we go, there’s my adorable little Petey Pie!”, he used the pad of his thumb to gently wipe away the tear stains on Peter’s cheeks, as he got into the bed, lying Peter down on his chest genty. He snuggled against him, little legs rubbing against Tony’s as rested his head on his chest. As soon as he heard his heartbeat, he let out a long breath, and closed his eyes. Tony was here with him now, everything was okay.

Tony’s entire body warmed at the sight. “Are you sleepy bun bun, do you wanna take a nap? Peter was usually good at these things. Although he could be a brat when Tony himself put him down for a nap or bedtime, he was usually quite honest if he was tired. Especially since he was almost completely mentally exhausted from today. But, he could just be looking to rest in Tony’s arms right now.

Peter shook his head, curling up against Tony more. “Nu uh, no nap”, he slurred quietly around the paci, small hand bunching Tony’s shirt into his fist. The man nodded his head, but didn’t say anything else, simply pressing soft kisses to his head occasionally, and rubbing his back in a circular motion. 

They stayed in this soft comforting silence for a while, Tony just wanting Peter to relax in the safety of his own home before he allowed him to get all worked up and excited. It would result in a build up of many emotions and he didn’t want Peter to have another breakdown because he couldn’t handle what he was feeling for the second time today.

It was around an hour before there was any movement from either of them. Tony had stayed completely still, simply admiring his beautiful baby as Peter began to doze off from how warm and gentle and soft everything was. But a loud gargled sound eventually came from Peter’s stomach which even frightened Peter himself, his eyes shooting open. He let out a soft whine, lifting his head as Tony looked over him concerned. “Awe, my little bunny’s hungry”, he whispered softly, gently placing a hand over Peter’s stomach and rubbing it gently. “Come on, let’s cook you some food and then we can watch paw patrol, and cuddle”, he said softly, which Peter squealed at, nodding his head eagerly. 

But Tony paused raising an eyebrow after a second. “Baby, what have you eaten today?”, he asked. He understood Peter’s metabolism was faster ever since the bite, and it could just be because he hadn’t eaten his after school snack but Peter was never usually this hungry. It was clear he was in discomfort from the way he was rubbing at his stomach. Peter frowned slightly, shaking his head showing that he didn’t want to say. 

Tony gave him a stern glance. Hooking his finger into the ring of his paci, he pulled it out from Peter’s mouth earning a whine of disapproval from the other. “Petey Pie, when it comes to your health, you know I don’t mess around!”

Peter huffed, sticking his bottom lip out in a pout. “Mr meanie head made me stay over lunch”, he muttered, barely opening his mouth to form the words because he didn’t want to talk about it. For a moment Tony’s gaze turned dark.

“He did what?” There was a cutting edge to his tone, And although it clearly wasn’t directed at him, Peter didn’t like it. 

He sniffled. “Daddy pwease don’t be mad at me”, he begged quietly.

“No sweet pea, no please don’t cry”, guilt settling in as he watched Peter’s bottom lip begin to tremble, “It’s not you daddy’s mad at, It’s your teacher, he can’t do that”, he explained.

Peter began to relax a bit more, scared that he’d upset Tony. “Said I wasn’t working hard enough”, he grumbled, his words slightly slurred with emotion. “And, and Flash was a poopy head. And - and daddy and, I failed my test”, he explained all at once, tears forming in his eyes once again. He bought the man’s hand from where it lay on his waist up to his mouth, it always helped when he was particularly sad. An oral fixation of sorts. Without a second guess, he began to suck on his pointer finger. It wasn’t his fault!! Daddy took away his paci. Tony sighed at the action, shaking his head but didn’t scold him. Peter would not be able to handle that right now so it was better just to give him what he wanted. 

“You haven’t had a good day today at all, have you baby?”

Peter shook his head, removing the finger for a second. “Nu uh”, he muttered, a frown on his pouty lips. Tony nodded his head. 

“It’s okay now baby, daddy here’s. And everyone at you stupid school is a dick.”

Peter gasped, the tears halting as he giggled and shook his head. “Daddy said a naughty word”, he hummed in a sing song tone, to which Tony smiled at and laughed. 

“It’s all better now my sweet baby boy. All better, right?”Peter nodded in confirmation. Pressing a soft kiss to Peter’s lips he brushed some of his hair from his face. “Daddy loves you so much sweet pea, never forget that okay? You were such a strong boy today going through all of that and daddy’s so proud of you”, he said softly.

Peter hummed softly, nuzzling against Tony. “I wuv wu too daddy”, he slurred around the finger, letting out a soft sigh of content. All the worries of today made so much better just by having Tony by his side.

Tony nodded content that he was a lot happier now, as he lifted him into his arms and stood. “What stuffie do you want baby, whilst daddy cooks?”, he asked gently. Peter seemed to think about it, a hard decision really when your daddy was spoiling you with new stuffies almost every week. But he eventually pointed to the one on the bed that Peter had been insisting on sleeping with every night since the day Tony began to care for him. It was a small iron man plushie, and the first one Tony had ever gotten for Peter. “A good choice if I may say so myself my beautiful little bun bun”, Tony hummed, causing another giggle from Peter as Tony passed the small stuffie to him. 

Together they ventured downstairs so that Tony could cook those little dinosaur nuggets he knew Peter loved. 

Today had been a really bad day. But bad days didn’t last, especially not when his amazing daddy was there to help him through it.

#starker #starker fanfiction #tony stark #peter parker #tony stark x peter parker #skylar writes #little!peter #daddy!tony

[stachmousworld]

Dear Dad, fuck you.

Pairing: Stuckony 

Summary: My take on Civil War, but with less property damage and as much betrayal and drama. 

TW: abuse both physical and verbal but not sexual (thank you Howard for your A+ parenting skills).

Ok, so you may cry and hate me at the end.

Also: This is the first installment of my universe A. The two others are: 

Dear Dad, fuck you Punishments

27 MINUTES AND 32 SECONDS AFTER THE CIVIL WAR

Tony would have never guessed it would have ended like it did. Not in a million years would he have thought that his dead dad would be his demise. He was dead for fuck’s sake. He couldn’t beat Tony, nor verbally abuse him anymore. He wasn’t there physically, and yet he managed, from the grave, to shoot him in the soul. Literally. There were no other words to describe the way he felt.

He couldn’t breathe, his head felt loud and light at the same time, he couldn’t stand straight but sitting down made the earth spin faster, if that made any sense. 

Eyes closed his thoughts spiraled out of the control and images. No. Memories of his dad stuck to his retina, giving Tony a full 3D experience, sound included. And eyes opened, reality dawned him: Steve and Bucky didn’t want him anymore.

You are a worthless piece of shit, that’s what you are.

I should have made your mom abort you.

I won’t pay for any ransom.

Why can’t you die?

Funny how when everything goes to shit, his dad is the first one he hears. Always. Tony was long used to his voice in his head, muttering death threats, insults, or influencing his suicidal thoughts.

Tony finally decided to sit on the couch.

“JARVIS, lights out”.

He flinched at the sudden darkness. His left eye twitched. Maybe it wasn’t a good idea, after all. He’d rather suffer under the artificial lights than…his breath quickened and his thoughts spiraled. He could feel hands on his shoulders. A fist to his left eye. A blow on his lower back. A sharp pain to his right wrist…

The lights suddenly went on. Tony gasped, body shivering from the phantom pain, the adrenaline forcing him to stay alive through all his tortures, while shock and uncertainty chained him close to reality.

Focus Tony. You can do it, whispered a soft motherly voice. He wailed at the sound of her voice. She was the only one he heard when everything went to shit. Not his mom or Ana, Edwin’s wife. No. Hers. He called her mammina even though Howard would have had a heart attack hearing him. She was a nurse, who used to take care of him every time he was kidnapped. All 7 times.

She was a middle age black woman, who had worked as their personal nurse in case of emergencies. She had given him more love in the first few months after his first kidnapping than both of his parents in years. 

She’d smell like vanilla and cinnamon and talk softly. She’d always have a twinkle in her eyes every time she’d tell him a story. Tony used to be so thrilled to listen to her. Whatever the kind of story, whether it was fairytales or made-up ones from her life, he’d feel as if he was a part of it. She never made him feel worthless. She even learnt Italian for him, calling him her Tesorio, when he’d show her his grades reports and inventions, Cucciolo when Howard or Maria were missing his birthdays, and Luce dei miei Occhi, whenever she saw him.

If he’d been her light, she’d been his sun in the darkest night. He couldn’t recall one moment when he didn’t hear her voice calming him, cheering him, reassuring him. Even she wasn’t here physically, she was still in his head. Always.

Her death had hit him hard. Harder than his parents. Harder than the Jarvis. She had always been his pillar. His guide in life. He could recall a thousand proverbs, phrasing, advice for each different situation in life. She had prepared him for the real world, and yet, he somewhat felt like a failure. After her murder (she was shot while going to church), he had totally lost touch with reality. His parents had been dead for a few years by then and Jarvis and Ana for less than 2 years.

Tony should have been seen it coming. Everyone died because of him.

He went to the funeral and sat in the back of the church, feeling like an intruder. He had jumped to his feet a few minutes in the ceremony and tried to run out, when his mammina’s daughter, Celestia, intercepted him, calling him in front of the entire church, his name resonating in the holy building. He could still hear what she said, loud and clear.

“Tony, my baby brother. Mom wanted you with us, your brothers and sisters. Don’t run, please. Luce dei miei Occhi, come back to us.”

It only took a few words for him to feel the sun. The light he hadn’t expected to see again.

At the end, he found more than a mom, he had a family.

And every year he went to each of their birthday. He had[AB1]  two baby siblings, two older brothers and one older sister, nieces, and nephews and even grandparents. They all accepted him for what he was and never used him, nor his money. They welcomed him when he was down, teaching him how to recover with love, a lot of talking and proof of fatherly/motherly love.

To say he’d been surprised, when he had to witness an “argument” between one of his nieces and her dad, would be a euphemism. He had feared the violence, the insults and other dismissal, but had been floored. They both had decided to go to their room for a few moments, the time to cool down and then talked in the living room in calmed voices. Not ones had he experienced an argument in his new family, even the most vocal ones, which didn’t end up calmly.

Never in his life had he seen a more functional family. More props to burn Howard’s grave.

“Sir,” JARVIS urged him.

Tony focused on his surroundings. DUM-E held a poisonous smoothie under his nose. How hadn’t seen him before?

“No, thanks, DUM-E”, he replied softly. “I feel a bit…nauseous”

DUM-E chirped sadly but moved away.

“Sir, are you all right?” JARVIS enquired worried.

“Yes, thank you, J’” Tony replied softly.

Tony stayed down for a moment. His breathing was back to normal and his migraine was gone. Maybe he should go to his bed and take a nap. He didn’t dare ask Jarvis for how long he’d been awake. He’d work on the prototypes later anyway.

           He stood up, wobbling on his feet and made his way to the doors.

You should keep Cap’s name out of your mouth, Boy. He was worth ten of you.

He never was slacking; you should take example on him…not that you’d be able to reach his level anyway.

You may be a genius, but you still couldn’t free yourself. What are you, 9? 10? You’re old enough to get away from these clowns. Kidnapping? I call it attention seeking.

At your age, Steve fucking Rogers fought against bullies despite his asthma and scoliosis. What’s your excuse? Go back to work!

Tony tried to tune out the voice, but they kept getting louder.

“Stop!” He screamed panicked.

“Sir? Your heart rate is to high, do you need Dr. Banner?”

“No!” He exclaimed. “No,” he repeated softer. “I’m okay”.

Lies. JARVIS’s silence spoke volume.

“I’ll…Where are the capsicle couple?” he asked uncertain.

“On their floor. They had restricted the access.”

Tony ignored the tug in his heart.

“To whom?”

J’ took his time to reply. It didn’t comfort Tony at all.

“Only me, huh?”

Silence.

“If I had wanted you to be silent, I would have put you in a coffee machine, J’. But thanks for looking after me.”

“It is my duty and my honor to do so.”

Tony went back to the couch, took his clothes off, staying in underwear and laid down. The lights went down to a semi darkness.

“Where are the others?” Tony mumbled, half asleep.

“With the Captain Rogers and Sergeant Barnes, Sir.”

Tony snorted. J’ must be really mad at them to use their titles, he thought, dizzily. As he closed his eyes, he felt the embrace of his mommina and a kiss on his forehead.

 DURING THE CIVIL WAR

Today was a good day, so Tony had thought. He wasn’t late in his projects, he signed contracts, surprising Pepper to silence (“No, I’m not going to die, again.” “Are you sure Tony?” Grunts in response.), he had even eaten his breakfast, lunch and snack. It was good day. Until Bucky came back to God knew where, dressed in a blue midnight suit. Steve was also wearing a suit. And by the look on their face, Tony believed he’d missed something and messed up already. 

He probably had forgotten an anniversary. But even as he racked his brain he couldn’t think of a single anniversary. Christmas was in a few days and nothing remotely important happened in this month. Nothing worth being celebrated. So what?

“I’m sorry”, Tony said unsure. He didn’t even know why he was apologizing and couldn’t questioned J’. Glancing at the others, he could tell they knew about this “important” day. And what was it with the grim faces?

“Tony,” Steve called gently. “Are you not coming?”

“Where exactly are we supposed to go?” he asked in the same vulnerable voice. God, he hated that. The tension was torture. He half expected Clint to jump in front of him and admit it was a prank. No. Cap would never participate in this kind of activities. And Bucky had always expressed his resentment against suits and tuxedos in general.

“Tony” Bucky sighed. “The cemetery”

“Someone’s dead!” Tony exclaimed fear pumping in his veins. He looked sharply around trying to find clue. The others didn’t let anything show. Even Bruce who was bad a hiding his emotion.

“Stop joking, man,” Clint said calmly. “You can drop the mask. We are your friends too, you know. No one is going to judge you for mourning your parents.”

Tony’s laugh erupted. They…he…what now? He tried to stop himself as Steve’s frown went lower and lower and morphed into a disappointed face. Tony bit his lips and coughed for good measures.

“Tony, can’t you be serious?”, Natasha said coldly. “Have some respect. We know it is hard for you…”

“You know?” He failed containing his hysterical laugh. It kept bubbling and escaping is control.

“Yes, we know.” Bucky intervened. “He was not only your father, but our friends. One of our closest, actually. I…regretted more than anything murdering them. If I could…If I had been stronger…”

“Don’t Buck, it was not your fault,” Bruce reassured him. “There was nothing you could have done to prevent that.”

Tony laugh died somewhere between Buck’s guilt and regret. Tony’s right hand felt too heavy, hanging by his side. He crossed his arms to relieve the tension.

“I won’t go.” He stated firmly.

“Why?” Bucky asked with a small voice. “Is it because of me? Because I could stay in the-”

“No Bucky. If you can’t go, I won’t. But Tony, we’ve known Howard the longest. He was our closest friend, don’t do that. He had helped finding Bucky when he was tortured and helped me adapting to my new body. He provided us unique gears. He was there for us. He…he had respected me despite my small height, my sickness. He saw the soldier in me. He believed in me,” Steve pleaded.

Tony felt the glares from the others and shuffled on his feet. He resisted the need to give in.

Stark men are made of iron, but you are none that. I don’t know who your father is, but it is certainly not me. Always crying, complaining…(laughter)

Look what you made me do! Stopping the production of weapon to built this…(throws the object at Tony’s face). You should thank me on your knees, boy! No one would do that for a burden like you.

“It is not the problem, Bucky, Steve. It has nothing to do with their murder or your friendship. You can go, but I won’t. I wasn’t going to, anyway, so it doesn’t change anything.”

Silence. Tony’s eyes stayed fixed on his biggest “threat”, Steve. He was red, not the sexy, embarrassing kind. No. The ugly kind. Tony widen his stance preparing for the worst. Steve would not hit him. He was 100% sure. But his words had the same effect anyway.

“Can’t you be more respectful, Anthony. Some of us didn’t have the chance to live a lavish lifestyle with caring parents. I don’t even know where my ma’ and pa’ are buried,” Bucky deplored.

Et tu, Brutus? Tony’s head snapped toward Bucky. What the hell? And “Anthony”, really? Bucky’s face revealed discontent. His eyes were narrowed and he stood tall and strong.

“I beg you pardon, James” Tony hissed annoyed.

“Tony,” Steve warned him, inching to stand in front of Bucky. Tony’s eyebrow went so high he felt a strain in his left eyelid.

“What?!”

“After everything they’ve done for you (to you supplied mammina’s voice). And you couldn’t do that? Going to their grave and commemorating their lives should be the bare minimal. After all, if it wasn’t for them, you’d be (loved) nothing,” Bucky spat.

“No…nothing!” Tony spluttered indignantly. “They were never around me. I didn’t even call them mom or dad, they had always been Maria and Howard. They were never there for any of my birthdays, celebrations, school representations, not even the annual parents-teacher meeting. I. Made. Myself. I was born alone, and I’ll die too.” He ended up breathless. He hadn’t wanted to spill these details. Hell, he hadn’t even talk about the worse of it.

“All I heard was “poor rich Anthony Edward Stark, mommy and daddy worked too hard to make the Earth a better world for me”, “poor me, I seek attention…”

The rest of Bucky rant was lost. His father words came back in full circle.

Then Sunset’s words “you were always too much. Too needy. Always seeking attention”.

Tiberius “I don’t know what I’d done with this attention seeking whore. Really Anthony is only good when he opened his legs. I don’t see the genius in him.”

Obediah “God, Tony, lay low for a few months and seek help. Closing the weapon sector, but for what? My attention? You didn’t need that for me to care for you. Don’t be delusional, what would your father say?”

Maria “Anthony, stop, touching my dress, you’re ruining it. (She called someone behind the 3-year-old Tony.) Hey, you! Go take Anthony to his room and locked it. (She went back to her conversation). If I had known he’d be so clingy I’d have given him some sleeping pills in his baby bottle. (Laughter).”

Mammina “Tony, why are you so far from me, come nearer. You know you can always come to me. (Tony mumbles a few words). An attention seeker? Baby no, where did you hear these words? (Tony stayed silent) Cucciolo, I would never lie to you, you know that. You are the cutest little child ever, and I have 3 of them. You’ve met them and they absolutely love you. You are the perfect big brother, Tesorio.”

Tony closed his eyes, took a sharp breath and straightened his back.

“You can all call me by any name in the book: whore, worthless piece of shit...” Bucky flinched, panicked. He opened his mouth, but Tony kept going. “Warmonger, Merchant of Death, attention seeker --” He spat the name. “...but it wouldn’t change the fact that the person you knew as my biological father was a disgusting man, and my biological mother an air-head bint”. Tony approached slowly from the soldiers. He felt enraged. How could Bucky even say that? If he wasn’t so angry, he’d cry at the ice-cold words of his lover, but he was on a rampage. “I should actually thank you. Thanks Bucky dear, you made me a huge favor: to not be in the same world as them”, he finished with a deformed smiled. He knew he looked demented. And for the first time in a long time, he didn’t care.

Bucky’s expression went from guilty to confused. He pressed his left hand flat on Tony’s collarbone to push him away or hug him, Tony couldn’t tell. He brought his own hand on top of Bucky’s, moving the vibranium one to his neck. Immediately, Bucky backed off horrified.

“Was it with this hand you choked her to death? God, this stupid bint couldn’t shut up! How many times she drugged me, and put me to sleep, because I was “too attention seeking.” He screamed at the top of his lungs. Bucky stared at him with an unreadable expression. Tony may have lost his got damn mind, and he didn’t care at all. He strutted to the elevator facing them.

“Do you hear that Howard, you “made me” Tony cackled. “I’d blow your grave, if it wouldn’t give you satisfaction”. As he entered the elevator, belly cramped by his laugh, he yelled through his tears. “Burn to hell Howard and Maria! Burn…”

   TEAM CAP 

“What the hell was that?” Clint said in shock.

“Stark lost his goddamn mind, that’s what it was,” Natasha replied faintly surprised, which said something.

Bruce was the only one not saying anything. Tony’s act had reminded him of…himself. But, no…Howard could have never abused him. Bruce shook his head clearing his mind. No, Tony just acting as a spoiled child. A very insulting one.

“Should we go check on him?” Bruce asked with mixed feelings. Tony had the chance to have parents providing for them and he literally wish them hell. The Hulk pushed his walls. Bruce took a few deep breaths. Tiny tin man sad, Hulk repeated in his head. Bruce didn’t even try to explain the situation, Hulk wouldn’t understand the situation.

Bruce put his head in his hands. He could feel the headache creeping.

“No.” Stave said categorically. He had his Captain voice. “I don’t know who this man was, but I’m...” His voice broke. “...disgusted by this behavior. It was not our sweet Bambi,” Steve finished lamely.

Silence.

“I guess Natasha; you were right in your report on him,” Bucky commented defeated.

“And I was starting to believe that I had been mistaken,” she reflected disappointed.

“What are you doing to do?” Clint asked tired.

“What do you mean?” Bruce answered, head still down.

“Are you going to bench him? Because I don’t trust someone who could say that and act like a maniac. And what about your relationship? I know it’s not our business, but we are family. A fucked-up one, but still.”

Steve looked at Bucky and sighed. Bucky had this faraway look in his eyes. His left-hand twitching next to him. Whatever he’d say, he’d not be able to get out of the loop Tony had pushed him in. Steve massaged his own temples.

“Is it how you all feel?”.

Everyone raised their hand, even Bucky.

“Ok. He’s benched. I’ll tell him tonight at the dinner. As for our relationship…” He took a deep breath. “If we can’t trust him to have our backs on missions…” He left the rest unsaid.

“We’re coming with you!” Clint declared out of the sudden. The rest followed slowly, still under the effect of Tony’s outburst. “Give us 10 to change and we’ll meet you at the Quinjet or the car?”

“Quinjet. It’s quicker that way. They were buried upstate.” Steve answered quickly, as Bucky fled. Steve followed him worried. He waved at the rest of the group and entered the elevator, next to his lover.

“Do you think he is…ok? He looked like he’d do something crazy. And that laugh…” Bucky’s all body trembled.

Steve hugged him and kissed the crown of his head. Bucky went lax in his embrace. He sniffed a few times as Steve murmured sweet nonsense to his ears. It opened the gate for their tears. Steve didn’t want to end their relationship. Tony had been his home in this century, helping him and proving him wrong from left to right. But…he had to be strong for Bucky and, most importantly, the team. He resisted the need to go to the workshop, pounding on the tainted windows, and confront Tony.

It must be a big misunderstanding. It had to be.

Please Howard and Maria, forgive Tony, he found himself praying silently. He himself had wished for his dad to survive the war and his mom to see him become a man. Please God, let it be a big misunderstanding.

If Tony apologized tonight, Steve would take him back, no judgements. He’d be benched for a couple of days, but Steve would hold to him for as long he’d let him. The pain in his heart matched the distress in Bucky’s eyes.

“You know him, he probably is working to cool down. Anyway JARVIS is here to help him if he needs anything.”

“I would have never thought he’d blown up like that. I read the psychological report of Natasha but dismissed it. Tony had forgiven me and given me a new arm. He even went into a relationship with us. How couldn’t we that side of him?”

Steve shrugged. When he thought about it, Tony had never been particularly keen on talking about his parents. Jarvis and Ana, ok. At first, even Steve had thought they were his godparents, not the butler and his wife. And when Bucky told stories about Howard, Tony tended to shy away and changed the subject. Steve was now frowning. Something dark and ugly woke up in the pit of his mind.

“Well, I don’t know. At first, I thought he never liked talking about them because he missed them, but after what we’ve just witnessed, I’d say he really hates them.”

“Do you think they could have been more than distant parents? He said stuff about his mom drugging him and his dad being a monster. But Howard had never been like that, right Steve?” Bucky asked, guilt pouring in his voice.

Steve heard the rest of his questions loud and clear. Were we so blind that we inflicted emotional pain to our lover? And the most important, what if it was true? Steve couldn’t reconcile the image of Howard, sweet and joyful Howard, and the one from Tony’s memories. If Steve…he swallowed with difficulty. If he were to believe Tony, and a big part of him already did, because Tony had never seen so raw, begging for them to believe him through his rage, Steve would set the entire cemetery on fire.

So, he hugged Bucky tightly and tried to reassure him.

“Sweetheart, no. Don’t do that. You can’t guilt yourself for that. Even blinded by his anger, Tony didn’t blame you for their death. He was angry and lashed out. He would have done the same or worse if it was me.” Steve refused to talk about the thanks for their murder. What the hell, Tony! Steve thought anger flaring in his chest. It wasn’t fair for Bucky, his sweet love he shouldn’t have to relive his worst moments. They survived the Depression, war, ice/Hydra and they were still together. Has everything been a sham? They had given their life for a better future, putting their lives in their friends’ hands, who were supposed to hold the peace torch, when Steve and the other soldiers couldn’t anymore.

But, it also explained why Tony was so jagged, his control issues, lack of trust, insecurities, big mouth…

It wasn’t fair for him too, their Bambi…Steve contained his tears. The mere thought of little Tony being afraid, unsafe (Drugged, he said) and sad, made him sick and furious. 

Steve deflated. 

No, Howard couldn’t…he hadn’t…

“He thanked me…” Bucky said broken. He pushed Steve, bending and heaving. Steve massaged his neck slowly.

“He didn’t mean it, Babe. He wanted to rile us up. You’ve seen how hysterical he was…”

It took a few minutes for Bucky to come back to himself, and even then, his face had a greenish undertone. A fit despite the serum.

“JARVIS, could you tell us if Tony is not okay, please?”

The AI took a few moments to reply.

“Yes, Sergeant Barnes.”

Bucky nodded silently, while Steve cringed. What a fucking day.

   POST CIVIL WAR

Tony woke up at the sound of an alarm. He groaned and covered his head.

“Sir, the others are already here. They have prepared dinner and request your presence.”

“What are the odd I could charm my way out of this trap?” Tony asked sarcastically.

“Slim to none. Emphasis on the none.”

Tony laughed and stood up. His left eye was blurry, but alas, he didn’t have the time to fix it, as well as his hand, which gave him hell. Stark men are made of iron, he said out loud to give him more strength.

The voice of mammina replied full of wit. “Oh, really? I don’t know about the Stark men but my little Tesorio is made of love. No one can take love away from you. It makes you fly, melt, explode, you feel invincible. Once you love, Tonio, you could rule the world, and bend any types of iron. I love you, my Luce. I’m proud of you, no matter what.”

Tony wiped his tears. I hope you are still proud of me. As he entered the elevator, his phone rang. One of his little brothers.

“What do you want Darius?” Tony asked upfront.

“Listen, listen. Go on, talk to him” Darius replied in a hush tone.

“’Onc’ ‘Ony! Onc’ ‘Ony!”

Tony cooed and felt his inside melt. His baby nephew, Anthony, was just a few months old and already a beam of joy in his life. He had more pictures than he dared to admit. Sue him, his nephew was the cutest, with his little dimples and crooked smile. But then again, his other niece and nephew had him wrapped around their chubby fingers.

“Hello big boy, Oncle Tony is so proud of you!” He cooed in his “I’m going to melt inside and have cavities” voice.

“Do you imagine our surprise when his first words were ‘Ony and then Onc’ Ony’. I swear to God, we won’t invite you anymore. That’s the third baby doing that stuff. Are you sure you don’t have any magic, bro?”

Tony laughed through his happy tears.

“I guess I have some magic left from mammina”.

“True, true”, he conceded. “Are you still coming for the commemoration?”

“Of course! I have never missed one and wouldn’t dare. I don’t want mammina to haunt me and whoop my ass.” Tony joked.

“Pfff. She’d never do that. You were always her favorite, didn’t know why. We knew she worked for a white and rich family (Tony rolled his eyes amused), and then we saw your scrawny ass and lost puppy eyes. Couldn’t resist this kid who needed to be our protector, even though, he was pocket size.”

“Hey! Although I liked the beginning of your story, the wording could be better. I never was pocketsize; we call it fun size.” He pouted.

“Who? The members of your “fun size” group”.

Tony grunted. Darius laughed and bid him goodbye in a hurry. Apparently, his nephew had taken his diaper off and was smearing poop on the white walls. Tony’s laugh resonated in the stilled elevator. J’ opened the doors as he placed the phone in his pocket.

The sight in front of him made him frown. He prepared himself to stay calm and have a mature conclusion to their arguments like he’d seen with his siblings. Mammina’s advice about love was about to come handy. They at least deserve the truth and some apologies. Hearing them talk about his parents so fondly had made him angry, jealous, then sad. Why was he not enough? Could he have done better, be a more obedient child… no. He wouldn’t go there. He had to stay clear-headed.

 Steve and Bucky had changed clothes. They were now wearing hoodies and joggings. Their comfort clothes. Like him. He had found Steve’s hoodie and Bucky’s jogging, in one of his private stashes. He would deny taken them and some other of their items because it soothed him.

This was going to be long. He took a deep breath as he walked towards the kitchen. The rest of the team were standing up around the table.

Steve went on Tony’s left and Bucky next to Steve. Tony stared at them sadly. The fluffy conversation with Darius seemed like years ago.

“You had fun on the phone,” Clint noticed calmly. Almost too much. It was such a 180 with his jerk personality.

“It’s not every day that you nephew’s first words are “Onc’ Ony”. Well, the two others did the same. So, I was kinda happy.”

“Lying Stark? You don’t have no family left,” Natasha accused him, eyes narrowed.

“So, family is only the people from your blood, got it.” Tony replied without showing any annoyance. He took his phone, scrolled down a few family pictures and showed them one, where his papà was still alive. Before cancer took him.

He introduced each member, referring them as his baby brothers or older ones. His finger trembled as he reached the head of the family. Mammina and Papà. A little Tony could be seen standing proudly next to two smaller kids.

“It was my mammina.” He explained softly. “She was the best woman in the world. She took care of me when I got kidnapped. She was always here to help me, heal me. She built me.” He threw a glance at Bucky, who was frowning.

“Kidnapping?” Bruce asked in disbelief.

“Tony…Why would they kidnap you?” Steve asked, as skeptical as Bruce.

“I’m a genius. I was the one proofing Howard’s blueprint. By the age of 7, I had improved one of his Jericho. But people kidnapped me because of money. They thought Howard would pay them. He never did. (Tony raised a hand to cut the protestations.) J’ will send you all the medical reports and police ones. He will also forward my file from CPS. I know it’s hard to believe it. He was your friend and never showed his other side. When you both went down, he died too. He became…” Tony choked on his words.

“How can we believe you, when you were so maniac, this afternoon? You hurt Bucky and used his guilt to make a point.” Natasha asked, arms crossed.

“If you don’t believe the official papers, you should ask Coulson and Fury. They won’t lie to you.”

“What?” Bruce blurted.

“What do you mean?” Bucky asked concerned.

“I don’t have the envy, nor the will to go through the verbal and physical abuse of my parents. Coulson and Fury were there to retrieve me from Shield office after each kidnapping. They couldn’t do anything because my dad financed the entire organization,” Tony explained bitter. “Call me selfish but this woman and this man (he showed mammina and papà), were my real parents and those are my brothers and sisters, grandparents…They are MY family. They chose me when my real parents didn’t.”

The room grew silent. Tony tap his left eye and groaned in pain.

“Are you okay, Tony?” Bruce inquired, with a certain unease.

He waved at Bruce, brushing his concern. Gosh, it itched. Fuck it, they already knew too much already. With his right index, he pressed firmly his temple and with his thumb pressed the corner of his eye. He felt the prosthetic pop out, disconnecting from the electronical socket linked to his brain. After all these times, he still felt proud of himself. He had succeeded in something his dad could have never. 

Everyone can create a missile Howard, but it takes a genius to create something so complex connected to the brain.

“Tony!”

Bruce’s voice bloomed in the room.

“The fuck!” Clint swore.

“Bambi?”

Tony finally paid attention to his surroundings. The lack of pressure on his socket almost made him come. If only he had his cotton swab and alcohol. He gritted his teeth to recede his pleasure. It wasn’t the right time to be distracted.

He turned blindly on his left and bumped against a wall. A human one. Tony raised his head and met Steve’s blurry ones.

“We are so sorry Tony. We didn’t know. It certainly explained why you didn’t want to talk about them.”

Tony frowned. They believed him, like that.

“Don’t you want to read the files, before trusting me?” He asked with a small voice.

Bucky shook his head.

“No, Doll. If you want, you’ll talk to us about it, but we won’t read anything. We trust you. Like you trusted me with my issues.”

Tony was left speechless. He had expected screams, fat tears and a few blows. It was anticlimactic at best. He tried to remember what Darius had told him about reconciliation. Now was his time to “apologize”.

“Ok. Ok. I have some apologies to say.” He held his hand to stop them, from interrupting him. “I should have talked to you frankly. If we had discussed about them, none of that would have happened. I should have understood that the people they were with you and with me were totally different. You’ve known them as your friends. And you wanted to visit your friends and not them as my parents.”

“That’s stupid, Bambi, and you know it. If we’d known what they did to you, we would have been pissed, and maybe broke a tombstone or two.”

“Steve!” Tony screamed flabbergasted. He glanced at Bucky who shrugged smugly.

“I told you he was a little punk.”

Steve didn’t even resent this affirmation. He was smirking (SMIRKING) proudly.

“So…you are okay?”

Clint looked so out of it. Natasha didn’t look like she really believed Tony. As if pulling his own eye wasn’t proof enough.

“What Clint meant, is that we still don’t trust you, Stark. And we had decided to bench you.”.

Tony step back, eye going from each of them to stop on Steve’s pleading ones.

“What?”

“We weren’t sur you were ok. What you said without context scared us.”

Tony’s left hand flew to his neck as a reassuring gesture. He massaged the place under his jaw. Bucky made a strangled noise, making him stop.

“I’m sorry, Bucky. I should have never done that and sorry for thanking you. Even though, I am still relieved they are dead. I wished it wouldn’t have been by your hands.” Tony apologized ashamed; face pinched in a pained grimace. He sighed deeply. “I understand all of your concern and I…would stay out until you deem me worthy.”

Bucky surged forward pushing a frozen Steve. He grabbed Tony’s face, pressing their foreheads together.

“You. Are. Not. Worthless” Bucky said through clenched teeth. “I don’t care what Howard or Maria said to you, but you are definitely not worthless.” Tony couldn’t avert his eyes and felt compelled to spill more truths, Howards truths.

“You should keep Cap’s name out of your mouth, Boy. He was worth ten of you.” He mumbled eyes now closed. He couldn’t handle to see the pity in those baby blue.

Steve gasped audibly. Bucky’s hand gripped tightly his face, pleading him to stop.

“Cap and Sarge were never slacking; you should take example on them…not that you’d be able to reach their level, anyway.”

Bucky’s breath hitched. Tony felt two additional arms around him.

“You may be a genius, but you still couldn’t free yourself. What are you, 9? 10? You’re old enough to get away from these clowns. Kidnapping? I call it attention seeking.”

Bucky stepped away, breathing loudly. You have done it, Tones, they are going to leave you. They’ll see that you are not good enough and leave you, he thought darkly.

“Buck!”

“Bruce”

Tony opened his eyes just in time to witness Bucky breaking his kitchen counter and Bruce’s departure. Clint and Natasha went after Bruce, leaving them all alone. What the hell just happened! Steve walked carefully to Bucky. He looked wildly around him, in defensive posture. Steve’s hands were raised in front of him.

“Bucky, everything is ok. There is no threat.”

“Tony,” he replied miserably before breaking down. He sobbed in Steve’s arms, eyes locked on Tony. He raised an arm to make it come. Anthony E. Stark would have deflected and made a run for it, then hid in his workshop, but Tesorio raised by his fierce mama sucked it up and approached. Steve let go of Bucky and embraced them both, crushing them both into his chest.

Tony hissed in pain. Steve backed away.

“What is wrong? Did we hurt you?”

Tony shook his head. His right wrist was, again, acting up. He should have never slept on it. He massaged his wrist firmly and waited for a little whirling sound.

           Immediately, the servos in the socket released the prosthetic. Tony moaned as the pinched nerve in his human upper wrist relaxed. He held his right hand with his flesh one, as he kept massaging the injured one.

“J’, pull up the blueprint for the latest version of Dub 4 and add a note to look for any rust. And also contact Dr. Cho, for my usual appointment.”

“Done, Sir.”

“Thanks.”

Still in his thought, it took him more time to notice the heavy silence. 

Oh. 

Steve was again in his personal space, Bucky on his right. They both eyed  him with awe and sadness.

“I was 7, my third kidnapping. They wanted me to build something or were mad at my dad for not coming nor paying them. Knowing I was a genius they had the brilliant idea to extract my eye. I was unconscious. I guess.” Tony explained while massaging under the eye pocket. “The hand came before I went to MIT. I had already won multiple engineering /robotic prizes. They had wanted me to build a missile, the first one. Guess Obediah was already dealing under the table. When I didn’t want, they severed my hand. I was conscious.” Tony stated numb. He hated thinking of his past defenseless self. He wished he could hug and protect his younger self.

Bucky pushed Steve aside and scooped Tony in his arms. He squealed but didn’t try to escape for once. Steve followed them briskly.

Once in their room, Bucky laid him in the middle of the bed and hugged him. Sweet nonsense pouring out of his mouth. Tony tried to ask Steve for help, but he joined them and did the same. Tony closed his eyes, fighting his weaker side.

Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry.

His persona broke piece by piece.

“I want my mammina,” he cried loudly, tears rolling down his cheeks. He missed her warmth, her smile, her scent. She should have been here instead of him. He destroyed so many lives building weapons while she was killed by them. Mammina, forgive me, please, he prayed in his heart.

“We know, Doll”

“We are sorry, Bambi”

“We’ll make it up for you”

“We love you”

Bucky’s strong body in front of him prevented him from curling on himself. He placed his head his heart, as Steve pressed his body in his back.

Soft kisses made him relaxed. She used to do that when he had nightmares, kissing his demons away.

“I ‘ove you, too” He confessed softly.

“Tell us about them, your family.”

When I was 3, I met this nurse. She was…

   Notes: Two baby siblings one his Kareem, Ahmaud.

Two older brothers Darius, Joseph

One older sister Janice

Mother masterrliiiisssstt ✨✨✨🐱‍🏍

#part 1 of many #stuckony #tony stark #writing #marvel mcu #mcu #character of color #bucky barnes #steve rogers #bucky x steve x tony #tw child abuse #child abuse #angst with a hopeful ending #black woman #adoptee #family adoptive #black woman character #black characters

[spellbound-banshee]

You - Tony Stark

Request: Hi! I love your writing so much 😭😭 can i request a Tony Stark imagine when you’re best friend with him for years and you love him but he never notices you and you watch so many girls came and go until you had enough and wanted to move on, then he realizes he loves you all along! Thank u so much 🥰🥰

of course, love! this sounds fun! and thanks so much :)

Summary: explained above!

Warnings: fluff, swearing, angst, bad writing, sexual themes

Pairing: Tony Stark x reader

“Morning Tony.” You greeted as a messy-haired and stumbling Tony Stark came down the stairs, just as you were pouring you both a cup of coffee. He mumbled a response, clearly sleep-deprived and rubbing his eyes harshly as he came to the counter to sit down. You passed him a cup of coffee while you poured milk and sugar into yours, blowing on the steaming liquid. “Should I make one for your lady friend as well?” You inquired, genuinely curious but with a bit of edge to your voice. 

His head popped up at your words, suddenly disinterested in the coffee in front of him. “How did you... oh shit-” He put his head in his hands and groaned. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t know you’d be back so soon, I thought you said you were going out so I figured-”

“Hey, you don’t have to apologize. It’s not my first rodeo, Stark.” You smirked, taking a sip of your cooled coffee and shooting him a playful glance.

You and Tony Stark are best friends. You decided you would move in with him when he thought he needed your help, but really he just wanted someone to keep him company on some of the lonelier nights. He was also completely oblivious to the fact that you were head over heels in love with him. Not wanting to mess up your strong bond, you obviously kept it a secret, deciding that being his “roommate” was enough, especially because you got to spend so much time with him. 

On the nights you would go out, he would bring girl after girl back to his house and they would leave in the morning with a great story to tell. You rarely saw the same girl twice, and sometimes you would be there in the morning to make him breakfast and instead be greeted by the face of some woman. Truthfully, it broke your heart. For years you dealt with this, but you knew it was his decision to “sleep around” like this, and he would never feel the same way about you.

And it kept happening, over and over again. Until one day you just snapped.

“I can’t...” You shook your head as you watched Tony and some blonde bimbo flirting at the kitchen island, eating the breakfast that you made them. Still in your pajamas, you rolled your eyes and quickly grabbed your purse. You didn’t know what set this off, but today you seriously couldn’t deal with Tony and his antics. You needed to get away.

“Hey!” Tony quickly sprung into action, gently grabbing your arm to get you to turn around. “What’s wrong, are you okay?” He seemed so genuine and caring, which is what frustrated you even more.

“I’m fine. I just... I can’t right now...”

“Hey, why are you being weird? What’s wrong? You can talk to me.” You felt tears brimming in your eyes, and you felt so stupid. You couldn’t believe you were about to break down over something you saw weekly. Today just wasn’t a day where you could handle this.

“You really are an idiot, Tony.” You sighed and shook his hand off of you. He was taken aback, he stood there in shock, not being able to move and paralyzed with the fear that he’d lost you forever without knowing what he did wrong. Letting out a small exhale, he sat on the couch, running his fingers through his messed up hair.

-

“She’s okay, Tony. She’s with me.” The sound of Rhodey’s voice was soothing to Tony, especially because it was confirming that the person he cared about most was okay.

“Okay, thank you.” He paused for a second, taking a deep breath. “D-Did she say why she was upset? I felt really bad and she just sped off without telling me anything.”

Tony heard Rhodey sigh heavily, and he could picture his hands coming up to pinch the bridge of his nose. “She’s right, Tony. You are so smart sometimes, but you really are an idiot.” Tony rolled his eyes, just wanting to understand why he’d been called an idiot by two of his best friends today. He was about to start yelling when Rhodey cut in. “Are you serious, Tony? Every time that you bring home different women, do you ever pay attention to the look on her face?”

Tony blinked. He didn’t know where this was going, but it felt like he wasn’t going to like where it ended. “She’s heartbroken, Tony. Can’t you see she loves you? She has been for years, and she thinks you don’t even notice her because you’re too wrapped up in the parties and the girls... she thinks that you’re drifting from her.” Tony felt his heart break into a million pieces. If he knew you’d felt that way, he would’ve confessed his feelings a long time ago. 

Deep down, Tony always knew he loved you. Whether it be like a friend or more than a friend, nothing could ever shake that bond. He couldn’t believe he was so blind, the most beautiful person in the world was standing right in front of him the whole time. His brain short-circuited, and for the first time in years he was at a complete loss for words.

-

Rhodey came back into the room with a warm smile as he looked down at you. Your cheeks were no longer sticky with tears and Rhodey had wrapped a blanket around you, putting on one of your favorite shows. You felt warm and content, and you looked up at Rhodes with a small smile. “What’s got you smiling?” You asked, nudging him a little as he sat down next to you.

“Tony’s coming over.” As soon as he said that you groaned, rolling your head back and whining like a child. “Hey, hey. He has something important to tell you. You two have to work this out, you’re best friends.” It sounded like a high school argument that could be resolved with a simple text, which in hindsight it kinda was.

A knock at Rhodey’s door made you jump a bit, sticking a hand into your popcorn and taking a small bite. With a final look back at you, Rhodes opened the door and a disheveled looking Tony stood at the door. He had this look of sick guilt on his face, especially when he saw you sitting on the couch. “I’ll let you two work this out...” Rhodes said, stepping out of the living room, though you knew he’d be listening from the other room. The thought made you smile.

After a minute of awkward silence, you reluctantly patted the cushion next to you. Tony quickly sat down, fiddling with his hands and struggling to look at your face. “I’m sorry...” That was all he said for a little bit, the voice so small and afraid you couldn’t help but feel terrible.

“I’m sorry that I’m such an idiot. You’re right, I’m blind and ignorant and I can’t believe I treated you like shit when you’re the only stable thing in my life right now. This whole time, it’s you. It’s only been you and I’m hitting myself for not realizing it sooner, but I... I love you, (Y/n).” The confession made your heart flutter and knocked the wind right out of you. You wanted to assure him that what you said was wrong, that he didn’t treat you like shit at all, but the words got caught in your throat. 

“Genuinely, I really do. And-and I’m sorry it took me so long, I just... I just got stuck.” He wasn’t breathing as he was talking, so he quickly took a deep breath in, making you smile slightly. His heart seemed to flutter when you smiled, and he felt like a high schooler all over again. You always seemed to have that affect on him, but now it seems it’s been dialed to eleven.

“Thank you... for coming all the way here and saying that, really.” You gave him a genuine smile, not knowing what to say or how to say it. “You haven’t treated me like shit... you really haven’t and I don’t want you to think that. You’re the kindest man I’ve ever known. I just never thought you felt the same way because...” You shrugged your shoulders, but he knew what you were implying. He shook his head guiltily, and when you saw this you quickly leaned over to put your hand on his shoulder, rubbing his back up and down gently. That always seemed to help when he was feeling bad.

“How about you let me make it up to you?” He asked, but this was a side of Tony that you weren’t acquainted with so often. He didn’t have his usual cocky smirk or sarcastic edge to his voice; his eyes were innocent, wide, and scared to be vulnerable, and his voice was small, almost child-like. “Can I take you out for dinner? Wherever or whatever you want, as long as it’s you.” You giggled at his words, pressing your forehead against his shoulder, unable to contain the butterflies having a rave in your stomach.

“Sure, that sounds nice. How about tonight?” You inquire with a teasing glint in your eye, causing him to look you up and down and smile. Tony admired how even in awkward situations, you could still keep a calm and light energy, it’s what made the two of you so similar. You made him feel comfortable, safe and welcomed without saying any words. In that moment, he knew you were the one. You.

“Tonight it is...”

-

#tony stark #tony stark fluff #tony stark angst #angst #fluff #tony stark oneshot #tony stark fanfic #tony stark fanfiction #rhodey #rhodes #james rhodes #tony stark x reader #robert downey jr #robert downey jr x reader #robert downey jr fanfic #marvel #marvel angst #marvel fluff #iron man #iron man x reader #iron man fanfiction #iron man fluff #iron man angst #iron man fanfic #iron man oneshot

[banashee]

Part 17 of my @badthingshappenbingo​

Square: “Suicide Attempt”

Please mind the tags and warnings in the bottom notes!

 Brooklyn Bridge at Night

 It's been a long day and Clint is dead on his feet, but still walking the way home instead of driving, waiting for a cab or taking the subway. He could have also taken Tony up on his offer of a ride, which he does sometimes, but today, he kinda wants this time for himself.

 All of those other options would have been a lot easier than walking all the way, but he’s also still in his uniform and carrying his bow and quiver. An Avenger attracts attention, even when they’re off-duty and not one of the shiny members that the newspapers love so much.

 Usually, Clint wouldn’t mind it, even though he’s still getting used to being “seen” and being out of the shadows of a spy organisation, having walked into the light of being on a team of literal superheroes. Three years is not long enough to be used to it. Maybe he’ll never be used to it.

 Tonight though, he’d rather keep to himself before he gets home to unwind.

 Clint is not in a great mood, but things could be much, much worse, either. Right now, all he wants to do is curl up somewhere warm with Phil and Lucky and sleep for the next three days.

 He’s lost in thoughts, more so than usual, and he doesn’t pay as much attention to his surroundings as he probably should in New York at night. Clint is walking in a haze, impatient to finally reach his apartment. But then his gaze wanders - stops - and very suddenly Clint is wide awake.

 About halfway on the otherwise empty Brooklyn Bridge, there is a small figure, standing behind the railing and close to the edge. Way too close to the edge for comfort.

 Carefully stepping closer, Clint can now make out the figure to be a teenage boy, probably around 15 or 17, if he had to guess. He’s clutching the railing and even though it’s not audible over the wind and nearby city noise, his shaking shoulders make it obvious that he’s crying.

 Something dark and painful turns in his stomach, and Clint walks just a little bit faster, as fast as he can without jogging or running or losing the calm. He doesn’t want to scare this boy any further and stops a few feet away - just out of reach, not wanting to crowd the clearly distressed teenager.

 “Hey. Are you alright?”

 Clint takes great care in keeping his voice calm and friendly, but the boy’s head whips around and he glares for a moment. Sniffles, then he says,

 “Fine. Please go away.”

 “If I did, would you get down here and go home as well?” Clint asks, already knowing the answer. His words make the boy look again, but this time, there is no anger in his dark eyes. Only desperation and more tears, and hey roll down his cheeks.

 “Why do you care?” he challenges, and wraps his arms around his torso, as if to protect himself. He is tired - so very tired.

 Honesty is the best way to approach this, Clint knows.

 He’s been in situations like this before - on both sides. He knows what it takes to talk a person down from attempting to end their life, knows how to keep them safe in the moment until they can get help, medical or otherwise.

 Clint also knows what it feels like to be the person standing on the edge, holding the gun or holding the knife in an attempt to end it. He understands the despair and emptiness that lead to decisions like this. Feeling lost and alone, too tired to go on - he knows all of it.

 But he also knows what life can be like after. He knows that even after all the pain and heartbreak, true happiness waits to be discovered.

 Coming from there, he may have the best luck now.

 “Because I know what it’s like to be tired enough to give up. I also happen to know that things can and will get better, with time and most of all help.”

 The boy looks at him with interest now, but remains silent. At least he no longer stares down into the cold depths of east river.

 “Do you mind if I keep you company for a while?” Clint asks, still keeping his tone calm and even.

 After a long beat of silence, the boy steps back a little, sitting down on the concrete floor and wipes a sleeve across his eyes. With a little bit of distance, but close enough to quickly grab the teenager if he gets too close to the edge again, Clint sits down next to him. He detaches the quiver from his belt and puts it down on the floor, right next to his folded up bow.

 “I’m Clint.” he offers, hoping that the chatter will help, or at least keep the boy occupied.  “Do you want to tell me your name?”

 The boy looks over, in the low light of the lamps hanging above them. His eyes wander to Clint’s face, then down to the shirt of his uniform and then the bow and quiver on the ground. His thought process is clear, and Clint waits patiently. He’ll go in whatever direction the boy next to him leads their conversation - anything as long as he can keep him safe.

 “I’m Lucas.” he says quietly, and after a beat of silence, after another look he adds, “You’re Hawkeye.”

 Clint simply nods at that.

 “Sometimes, yeah. Right now I’m just a Dude.”

 Lucas is quiet in the minutes that follow. His tears are slowly drying up, but he’s still tense. After a while, he looks back over to Clint, who is waiting patiently for Lucas to say something.

 Clint is calm and steady, keeping his posture open, but he remains quiet for now.

 “Your first instinct will be to fill in the silence - don’t. Let them talk in their own time.” he remembers the Agent leading the seminar about Suicide prevention telling them all those years ago. Clint knows the urge and fights it - despite knowing the other side, he still itches to say something, to do something. To help.

 “Uhm. My parents kicked me out.” Lucas blurts out and starts fidgeting with the seams of his jacket.

 “I uh, I’m gay, and they don’t like that. Things have been difficult ever since they found out. Then we had a fight, just about a month ago. They told me to get out of the house and to never come back. Well, that’s the short version. There was also a lot of shouting and slurs thrown my way.” Lucas angrily wipes his eyes, trying to stop a new flood of tears, but it’s useless. He still keeps talking though, breathing hard and ragged while he does so.

 “ I’ve been staying with my friend after that and he’s great, he really is and I love him for it, but… I’m just so tired, and I feel like a waste of space. Everyone will be better off without me.”

 Lucas sounds defeated, empty and sad. But now that he’s started, he keeps talking, eyes locked on the New York skyline that is illuminated by thousands of lights in the night.

 It is a beautiful view, but both of them know that this city can hold a lot of heartbreak and loneliness.

 Clint listens to Lucas, patiently and mostly silent, only nodding here and there, offering words of comfort. Lucas cries at times, and Clint manages to find a pack of tissues on his suit that he hands over.

 Listening, really listening is something he is a master at, even with his physically shitty hearing.

 Clint doesn’t mind being here for people to vent to. That, and his ability to wait and sit in one spot perfectly still help a lot. He could never deny anyone this comfort if they need it.

 The clock is ticking away, and  Lucas just keeps talking, seemingly getting more and more comfortable around Clint.

 Maybe it is a good thing that he’s recognizable in his uniform and with his weapons of choice close by his side. Or maybe an open ear and patient person to listen and be there is enough in a city that swallows people alive if they're unlucky is enough - whatever it is, it helps.

 It is a near miracle, but Clint manages to get Lucas down from the bridge, eventually.

 He also walks him to the nearest hospital, because he is uncomfortable leaving him alone in this state of mind.

 Lucas protests at first - he doesn’t have an insurance, he blurts out in a panic, but Clint insists as he tries to calm him down. The Avengers have charities for this, and they’ll keep in touch, he promises. Lucas looks at him with a mixture of hope and disbelief, but then he agrees, very silently and looking much smaller and younger than he already is.

 In the privacy of his own head, Clint thinks, that there is no way he would have left Lucas to his own devices. Even if there wasn’t a official way to help with this, Clint would have paid for the hospital bill out of his own pocket - as long as this kid is safe and taken care of.

 He also calls the landline of Lucas’ friend, after he’s given him the number - Lucas refuses to talk to his own parents, and Clint understands - he knows how difficult these things can be.

 In the hospital, he waits with Lucas until his friend arrives with his Mom in tow.

 It doesn’t take them long at all, and when a tall and gangly boy around the same age as Lucas comes running to the waiting area, Lucas doesn’t hesitate when he pulls him into a tight hug, both of them refusing to let go for a long time.

 The mother, who seems to be an older, female version of her son, looks stricken and hugs Lucas as well, talking quietly to him and Lucas just nods, pressing closer to her in a way that is heartbreakingly vulnerable.

 Clint is starting to feel a little lightheaded, but he is immensely relieved that Lucas now has people he knows and obviously loves around him - they’ll figure out the rest.

 Clint keeps his distance, not wanting to intrude in the private moment. Having a little time to catch his breath is also well needed - this night has taken its toll on him, and it’s starting to show.

 He still manages a small but honest smile and friendly words when their ways finally part, and Lucas surprises Clint with a sudden but tight hug.

 “Thank you for being there.” he tells him, and Clint simply hugs back, hoping that this boy will get the help he needs - at the very least, he seems to have found a loving environment now, even when his own parents are unwilling to provide this.

 A nurse shows up and walks the three of them down the hallway, Lucas in between his friend and the mom, both having an protective arm wrapped around him.

 Clint takes this as his cue to go home.

 It is late, so, so late at night when Clint opens the front door and shuffles into his apartment.

 He’s started out the night exhausted, but now he’s completely drained. He lets his bow and quiver drop to the floor, and quickly joins them there.

 He sits right in front of the door, back propped up against it and legs sprawling all over the floor.

 Clint can’t make out the soft clicking sounds from Lucky’s claws as he rushes through the apartment to greet his favourite human, but he smiles when the dog runs up to him, tail wagging furiously and licking his face in true dog excitement.

 Clint is happy to let Lucky do his thing, running his hands through the thick fur, leaning one cheek against Lucky.

 As always, Lucky seems to pick up on the fact that Clint is upset, so he remains close and simply lays down right on top of his legs, affectionately licking the hand closest to him.

 Then, there are steps coming closer to Clint, and he looks up to see Phil coming up to him. He’s already in pyjamas and looking concerned as he kneels down next to Clint, softly kissing his forehead and brushing away a strand of hair. He leans into the touch, and Phil takes this as an invitation to pull him into an embrace.

 “Hey. Are you alright?”

 The choice of words is not at all unusual, but right now, they make him want to cry because it’s just the same phrase he used earlier to approach Lucas on the bridge.

 Clint chokes on his own voice, and then everything comes crashing down around him - the thoughts and emotions of his encounter with Lucas, the worry and the fear for this boy’s safety. His own, old memories and experiences. The long, exhausting day and the equally long week.

 His hold onto Phil tightens and Lucky shuffles closer, whining softly and pushing himself against Clint while he lets go of the pent-up emotions.

 Clearly worried, Phil strokes his hair with one hand and keeps the other arm firmly wrapped around him, talking low and staying close by his side.

 Clint can’t make out half of the words, too out of it to listen in the first place, and Phil’s voice is too low for his aids to properly pick up. But he can feel the vibrations of it, the soft and familiar rumble against him incredibly soothing.

 He’s home, and he can safely let go now.

 After the worst of the storm has passed, Clint pulls away.

 “Sorry about that. It’s been a long day.” He sighs, head leaning onto Phil for a moment longer, and then they both get up from the floor. Lucky still remains close to Clint, who reaches down to stroke his large head.

 “Good boy, Lucky. I’m okay. It’s fine.” he’s starting to ramble, and stops himself when he realizes.

 “Are you sure?” Phil asks, and gets a small nod.

 “Yeah, I… I just need a shower. I’m gross right now.”

 When Clint makes it to the bathroom and piles his clothes into the laundry basket in the corner, he knows that Phil is in the kitchen and making tea. He knows Phil is going to  ask, but never pushing him to talk, because he never does. Instead, he’ll provide support in whatever way it’s needed, even when it’s entirely silent. But the offer is there. It always is - Clint will probably take him up on it tonight.

 Lucky, however, still follows him like a large, fluffy shadow. He nearly jumps into the shower with Clint, and it makes him laugh out loud, even with the salt of dried up tears crusty in his face, hair a hot mess and a pounding headache and racing heart.

 This goofy dog always manages to make him laugh, makes him feel better even on a dark day and Clint loves him dearly just for existing. He tells Lucky as much, even when he pulls him out of the bathroom to prevent a wet disaster at fuck o clock in the morning.

 When Clint steps into the living room a little while later, Phil waits for him on the couch, two steaming hot mugs of tea ready for them. He settles down next to him and leans close, inhaling the comforting scent that is so familiar in a unique way that is so very much Phil. Clint has been associating this with home for many years now.

 He accepts the warm mug that Phil is offering him, taking it with a small smile and wrapping his hands around it. The warmth helps chasing away the chill in his bones, and so does the feeling of being close to his partner.

 Clint remains silent for a while, cuddled up with Phil, tea in his hands and Lucky sprawling on top of him. It feels good to soak up this comforting feeling of home, and for a moment, he basks in it, debating if he should just leave it at that. But deep down he knows it won’t last - he needs to talk about this. If only to get the thoughts out of his head, and so Phil knows where his mind is wandering.

 This night's encounter with Lucas has hit a little too close to home for him - he knows it’ll catch up with him eventually, and he really, really doesn’t want to go there again.

 After minutes of silence tick by, Phil turns over to him while he keeps drawing invisible patterns onto Clint’s forearm with soft fingertips.

 “Do you want to talk about it?” he asks, and Clint takes a deep breath. Then he nods.

 “Yes, I think that would be good.”

 And so he does.

*+~

Square: "Suicide Attempt"

                             Warnings:

- Attempted suicide of a teenager, not graphic, no blood or violence - Talk and thoughts about suicide - Implied homophobia, unsupportive family - References to emotional abuse - Mental health issues

#banashee writes #bad things happen bingo #marvel fanfiction #hurt/comfort #tw mental health #tw suicide

[tarithenurse]

Agent of Hope - 23

Your world falls into ruin together with the Strategic Homeland Intervention Enforcements Logistics Division when you find out that your boyfriend isn’t one of the good guys. Pairing: Brock Rumlow x fem!reader, Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader Contents: Errors (no, I did not spell check this time – shame on me), dealing with trauma, mental health care, feels, growth, smut, pain. A/N: So, this is one of those chapters that I call a “bridge”. Maybe that’s not the right term, but it’s needed for…reason. You know before tossing the last chapters at you. Lots of love for liking and reblogging!!

23 - Never give up. Never back down

…   Romanoff   …

The change comes creeping in like the first light of dawn that suddenly makes it possibly to make out the shape of furniture in the dark and later adding a depth to the surface even before the colours are visible. Some days are exhausting for both [Y/N] and Natasha in each their own way. One is drained from the weekly session with the psychologist or maybe the hard physical training under the stern but kind guidance of Maria. The other, a certain redhead, finds it had to stand by. Hands off even as her love struggles with nightmarish processes that set off nightmare after nightmare until her throat is raw from crying out in anguish. No preparation can make it easier. No knowledge of the importance can soothe the Avenger when she rocks the shaking woman in the dark of night.

But that’s not the real change.

The change is the flashes of peace. The straight back and head held high. It’s the healthy thoughts that are voiced, each time with a sense of acceptance that they are the truth.

Sitting in the kitchen of the Compound, [Y/N] is allowing herself to be completely absorbed in the book she’s reading only glancing up when the glass of lemonade is empty. Clint, who’s sitting next to her, is twirling a straw around in his own empty glass but otherwise only paying attention to the take-out menu. Supposedly. Natasha is fairly certain that she’s heard him drinking even after he’d drained the jug and as such running out of options for a refill plus it’s the kind of stunt the archer has pulled on pretty much anyone who isn’t paying attention to their snack, drinks, or food.

“Mister Barton,” [Y/N] begins hyper-politely, “do you have any knowledge of what might have happened to the last half of my lemonade?”

The man puts on the perfect display of surprise spiked with such a subtle outrage at the underlying accusation that Natasha knows 100% that he’s guilty. “What? Why should I know?”

“Not buying that,” you happily announce, “so I guess I’ll use you to test out something Maria told me about.”

You refuse to tell the suddenly nervous archer what it is, merely patting him on the shoulder as you get up to make a new batch of lemonade.

…   Reader   …

Every single muscle in your body is sore. It hurts to put on a sweater. There are muscles in your back you didn’t know you had screaming at you when you bend to put tie the shoes. Hell, you can barely face going to the loo because your thighs and butt are punishing you for all the work you’re putting into the training with Maria, but at least it’s finally paying off. The former SHIELD agent is an exceptional teacher: honest, but kind without talking to you like you’re a kid. Most importantly, though, there’s an unspoken understanding of why you feel like you have to learn to defend yourself and perhaps feel like you’re in control of your own body. So that’s where she’s started.

First, she has helped you get into shape with simple cardio and strength, teaching exercises you can use on your own in the impressive gym two floors down. The second step has been to show how to use defend against simple attacks by using the other person’s body (weight and size) against them – your own stature is irrelevant or can even be used as an active benefit.

“Aaaah.” Hot water sloshes against the sides of the tub as you lower yourself into the soothing bath.

Natasha’s voice drift through the gap by the door: “Should I be jealous?”

She’s perched on the bed with the blue light from the tablet creating shadows almost as ominous as the intel she’s studying for tomorrow’s missions. Well, it starts in the morning when the present Avengers (Tony, Nat, Cap, and Clint) all leave for wherever they’re heading, and if all goes well they should be back in three days.

“Mhmmmmm…I’m having an affair with the bathtub.” The heat seeps into stiff limbs, dissolving reluctant tensions. “Sometimes we even go as far as adding bubbles to our fun.”

There’s an audible snort and you can imagine the exasperated eyeroll that doesn’t diminish her smile. Perfect, that’s how it is. Sliding deeper into the water, jaw skimming the surface as steam rises past the face, you’re completely enveloped in subtle heat and it lulls you into a drowsy contentment that pulls the eyelids down.

A rustle of clothes seems to filter in from far away before the water and you are stirred by sleek limbs as Natasha settles between your willingly parting legs, back against chest, with a quiet moan. Perhaps it’s an addiction rather than natural behaviour, but your hands are drawn to her, first massaging the tension from shoulders that hold up your world too before flat palms start stroking her arms. Her chest. The swell of her breasts where fingertips tug and twist the rapidly hardening nipples only for the warm water to soothe the skin.

She’s your friend, ally, and lover. Someone you never planned on being such an integral part of your soul and though logic dictates you could be happy without her, you simply don’t want to try. Natasha.

You love these moments when the tough hero melts like snow in your hands, head resting against your chest and mouth slightly open to release the quaking sighs of satisfaction conjured by you and no one else. Tasha is surrounded by you, laid out bare and vulnerable and easy to read. Breaths hitch, toes curl, her fingers dig into the flesh of your thighs as your fingers move faster now they’ve found her clit. She’s granted a few fingers for the core to clench around, and holy fuck, the heat fluttering around the digits that curl against the soft walls is beyond divine. Better than any bath could be.

The name on her lips as she falls apart in your hold is like a prayer. Or the praise from a goddess who has decided to adorn the life of a mere mortal, you.

“[Y/N]!” There’s a hint of a whine to her gasp. “I love you.”

The red locks are matted against her skull from the steam but still soft on your lips as you find the way to her ear. “I lo–”

Out of nowhere, the pain bombards you, starting in your head but sending rigid tendrils into the rest of your body.

…

Gone is the gentle lapping of the water and the comfortable weight of Natasha’s body against you. Fighting against leaded eyelids, you catch a glimmer of white and steel illuminated by a (thankfully dimmed) panel of LED lights overhead, but it’s the smell of hand sanitizer that reveals where this is. Infirmary. This time, as you try to look around again, it’s evident that you’re alone. Aware of an itch on the back of your hand, it’s with some trepidation you begin to search for the button to call for the nurse or whoever’s on duty.

What happened? You recall the bath, the sighs on Tasha’s lips before…the vision. The scene had unfolded (or will unfold) somewhere tropical, a lush jungle as a backdrop for the little houses in a village or maybe the outskirts of a town. It’s the two-story building with the flaking reddish concrete that holds Brock, so that’s where you have to go because you’re the only one that can get access to the place. But…why? There’s no logic to it as far as you can tell. Why would he let me in? But he did, or will, waiting on the other side of the door with a crazed smile as if it had been an agreement to meet. It hurts just to think about it, and not just in your head.

A door slides open with the ssshhh of vacuum, allowing the petite Dr. Cho to enter with Maria Hill in tow.

“How you feelin’?” Maria asks, phone in hand and thumb dancing on the little screen, “Promised to let Natasha know as soon as you woke up.”

Your throat is dry when you try to answer, but Cho is already prepared and stands with a glass of water with a straw in it. It’s drained before you try again. “I’m ‘kay…I guess.” Admittedly, you wouldn’t quite mind volunteering to test a guillotine, but that just means you’re alive. “Where’s Tasha? Why am I here?”

…   Romanoff   …

48 hours. Learning to wait had been a part of Natasha’s training, but the last 48 hours after [Y/N] seized up in the bathtub have been the longest and hardest to get through for the former assassin. Steve had offered she stayed back, he could ask his buddy Sam to cover, but of course she can’t accept that either. The redhead needs to stay busy which isn’t an option if she stayed by the side of the bed. Useless, that’s what Tasha would have been.

“Everything’s okay?” Clint asks, placing the last slice of cheese on the impressive sandwich he’s made.

There’s a distinct absence of weight on Natasha’s chest, a pressure she hadn’t allowed herself to focus on until now when she finally can breathe freely again. “Yeah, everything’s fine.”

#Agent of hope mcu fanfiction #natasha romanoff #Natasha romanoff x reader #Black Widow #natasha romanoff x you #Black widow x reader #Black widow x you #avengers #Hydra #Brock Rumlow #Former Brock Rumlow x you #Former Brock Rumlow x reader #Crossbones #captain america #Steve Rogers #clint barton #hawkeye #Iron Man #tony stark #maria hill #SHIELD #Dr. Cho #helen cho #MCU #mcu fanfiction #fanfiction #fanfic #Bitasha #bisexual #smut