#DREAM OF A NEW LIFE WITH HER ON A NEW CONTINENT

[annaskareninas]

My ACOTAR Fanfiction Masterlist

(Link to my ao3 profile)

Elucien:

All Roads Lead To You = completed, 5 chapters, 31k words, rating E // Five years after the war with Hybern, the world is relatively peaceful, and Elain is relatively bored. When she decides to travel the Continent in search of her purpose, the last thing she expects is to run into her almost-mate Lucien Vanserra at a wine bar in Montesere -- and get very drunk and go swimming. Together. The next morning, she flees in shame -- but wherever she goes, Lucien just keeps on appearing. As if it's destiny.

Phoenix Rising = ongoing, updates every Mon, Thurs and Fri, with a final length of 140k words and 32 chapters, rating M // It has been twenty-five years since Elain was Made. Ten years since she lost the love of her life, Azriel, defeating Koschei. Eight years since Beron Vanserra claimed the Dread Crown and became High King of Prythian, forcing Elain and her friends to scatter to the four corners of the world. Lost in her grief, Elain works as a nurse in a war hospital in Rask -- until one day, she recognises a patient: Lucien Vanserra, the last free Heir. Charged with healing Lucien's mortal wounds, she finds herself drawn into an adventure -- of dragons, prophecies, allies and magic. But Lucien has secrets too, and as she grows closer to him, it is her heart that faces the biggest test.

Lonely Together = one-shot, 7k words, rating E // Always the odd one out, always the one without a partner -- Elain can't help the loneliness that plagues her immortal life. Until one Starfall, she decides to finally make a move on her mate, Lucien -- one one condition: that he's not gentle.

Feysand:

A Rake By Any Other Name = Regency AU one-shot, 7k words, rating E, the first in my Regency Romance one-shot series // Feyre gets more than she bargains for when she's caught at a political radical meeting by Rhysand, Viscount Velaris.

Nessian:

Burning Bright = Regency AU one-shot, 8k words, rating E, the second in my Regency Romance series // Dissatisfied with her life living off her brother-in-law's money, Nesta finds solace in Cassian, the groundskeeper, who thinks nothing of proper society -- and everything of pleasure.

Azris:

The Tender and Growing Night = Regency AU one-shot, 8k words, rating E, the third in my Regency Romance series // When Rhysand brings Azriel to a new gentlemen's club, he realises this is a place where he can truly be himself, for the first time ever. And the club's owner, Lord Eris Vanserra, has caught his eye...

Elriel:

I Dream About You = one-shot, 5k words, rating E // Azriel returns to the House of Wind to find Elain, alone; it's time for her to tell him what she really thinks.

Other:

In Spring, Becomes the Rose = Elain/Lucien/Tamlin, 82k words, 20 chapters, rating E // Elain volunteers to go to the Spring Court to help rebuild, with Lucien alongside her. She expects to hate Tamlin -- to hate them both, actually -- but the truth couldn't be further from it. As well as rebuilding a court and redecorating a house, Elain finds herself grappling with irresistible feelings for both males -- as well as strange new powers and magic she must learn to use before it's too late.

This post will be regularly updated when I post more! Enjoy <3

#acotar #a court of thorns and roses #fanfiction #elucien #nessian #feysand #elriel #azris #acotar fic #writing #ao3 #a court of mist and fury #a court of wings and ruin #a court of silver flames #elain archeron #lucien vanserra #elain x lucien #sjm

[lili-of-the-wildfire]

sjm is a sick bitch for what she did to sam and i WILL be reaping my revenge for that one, my fucking god

#WHAT DID SAM EVER DO BUT DREAM SARAH #DREAM OF LOVE WITH CELAENA #DREAM OF A NEW LIFE WITH HER ON A NEW CONTINENT #DREAM OF FREEING HER FROM HER GOLDEN CAGE #EVERYONE EXCEPT SAM CAN BE A DREAMER APPARENTLY #oh i’m so fucking sick she didn’t need to describe his body like that #celaena is stronger than me bc i would’ve killed myself im being so serious #throne of glass #sam courtland #the way i am legitimately nauseous imaging the way he died and he’s NOT EVEN REAL #rest assured i already know arobynn gets his shit fucked #ToG spoilers

[randomshyperson]

Do I Wanna Know - Wanda Maximoff Kinktober #05

Summary: Taking advantage of the fact that the Avengers are going through a divorce, you decide to visit your (not-so-secret) girlfriend in the compound. While they fight, you entertain Wanda and present her with a third option besides staying in the tower or fighting Steve Rogers: to run away with you.

Warnings: (+18), shapeshifting reader, some talking of gender identity, implied gender neutral but use of female pronouns, established and secret (ish) relationship, canon-divergence, bottom!Wanda, making out, unprotected sex, creampie, intimate teasing, praising, general fluff.  | Words: 4.131k

This work was turned into a series. Check the masterlist here.

General Masterlist | Kinktober Collection | AO3 | Wattpad

-&-

It got more dangerous every time it happened. But getting caught, and all the consequences that would come with it, were distant ideas, possibilities that didn't cross Wanda's mind, especially when she was at your place.

She didn't think about the team, the country, what anyone else might think and judge about the relationship - if she could call it that - between the two of you.

All Wanda could focus on when she was around you was undeniably you.

It became a secret routine, a hidden part of her life that she looked forward to almost all the time. Between tiring and dangerous missions, a new excitement among the gray corners of the private life of what many would call the most powerful Avenger.

Nobody knew about you, not the way she did anyway. What the others saw was the smuggler with no loyalty - the thief who stole and would steal from anyone in her path, for the best price. And could also take anything she was paid to take. From a diamond necklace to an infinity stone, from the most exclusive party of the world's elite to the secret country in the middle of the African continent. 

Sometimes, Wanda would trace Wakanda's scar on your skin while you slept, and wonder if the person you were at that moment was the same person that King T'Challa wanted behind bars for a few pieces of metal.

The moral part didn't bother her much - if she was honest, Wanda understood impressions and what really mattered very well. Coming from a country exploited by the United States, which praised a man in blue who was very reminiscent of the captains who marched to the corners of the world to massacre cities, to one who wore iron armor and produced the same bombs that took the lives not only of her parents, but of the vast majority of the children she grew up with, Wanda understood hypocrisy like no one else. Despite everything that had happened to her, she shared a roof with the man indirectly responsible for her parents' deaths. No one could judge her so easily, but Wanda was sure that if your relationship went public, it would happen in the blink of an eye.

So when she was fleeing, for hours between one mission and another, one meeting and another, she tried to enjoy you as much as possible.

And sometimes, when you were apart for too long, and she worried that she was beginning to forget the features of your face, Wanda could prepare a surprise.

She could lie, taking advantage of her magic or not, to prolong everything from your time together to the sensations you shared in bed. She could haunt you - and you would use that term because, without her around, the feeling of lack was very similar to that of loss.  - Wanda would invade your dreams, like a sigh in the night never to leave your mind.

But more often than not, she would simply mark you with hickeys and scratches on everything hidden beneath your uniform, and you might leave a path of purple through the valley of her breasts that would be the only proof of the hours she had spent enjoying your company.

The Avengers were on a thin line now - Accords, fights, and old friends, and neither you nor Wanda knew it, but soon, the world would see you two the same way. 

Criminals on the run.

But the future hasn't arrived yet - And Wanda, unbeknownst to you, was locked away in a tower like an ancient princess, and you, against the advice of your own safety, went to visit a damsel who wasn't so much defenseless but would definitely be distress to see you there.

"You can't be here." The warning came against your lips, pressed into hers half a second after your arrival into the room - you could only kiss back, smiling at the tug on your leather jacket that fell to the floor behind your feet. 

"I missed you too princess." That's what you said back, your hand wrapped around her waist as your tongue slid into hers. 

Wanda sighed, her body yearning for your touch and presence just as much as her heart for the last few weeks without seeing you. Despite pushing you around the room, until you were sitting on the bed, Wanda interrupted the motions, her frown of concern and her out-of-rhythm breathing escaping through her swollen, ajar lips.

"I'm serious." She begins a hand on your shoulder to keep you in place. "They can't see you here-"

"The Avengers aren't home, I was told." You justify quickly, your gaze wandering to look her up and down. Wanda always looked so beautiful, it was almost unfair. "United Nations meeting, everyone's talking about it."

One of your hands plays with the folds of her skirt, pulling it up, but Wanda pushes them away.

"Most of them, yes, but I'm not alone." She murmurs, looking around and undeniably using magic to check the floor. "Vision is keeping me company."

"Which one is Vision anyway?" You retort casually, not caring about the last gesture, moving your hands under her clothes and biting back a smile at the way her thigh muscles quiver with your touch. 

Wanda rests her other hand on your shoulder, her gaze serious. "The one with the damn magical stone you once stole from Hydra." She retorts, sighing softly as she feels your fingers playing with the laces of her panties. "Please, detka. Vision... would kill you if he found you here."

You click your tongue. “I could disguise myself…” But Wanda shakes her head.

“The stone can see beyond.” She retorts with a certainty that makes you assume this information came directly from her team's study of the Stone. But instead of answering right away, you pull her by the thighs onto your lap, smiling mischievously at the surprised yelp that you muffle on your lips. Wanda tries to listen to reason, but it's too faint compared to the pounding of her own heart. 

"Don't make a sound and he'll never know." You whisper your last request before kissing her intently, your bold hands teasing inside her blouse. It doesn't take long for Wanda to be restless in your lap, panting against your tongue exploring her mouth so hungrily, sweating with the precise stimulation of her nipples as your hands pull down her dark bra. But despite a mind almost completely clouded with arousal, she bites at your lower lip and breaks the kiss.

"I missed you." Wanda likes you to know these things because sometimes, you have less than an hour together and it feels like one of those times. She hasn't seen you for weeks, and God knows when she'll get another chance now that the team seems on the verge of collapse. 

You give her a teasing smile, your hands wrapped around her. "You're so sweet, Wanda. My beautiful, darling, princess." Your compliments were accompanied by chaste kisses against her jaw, and it always works to leave her a mess, melting into you and at your beck and call. 

In the safety of your embrace, Wanda risked being vulnerable:

"Did you miss me too?"

You're not so good at these things - It comes from your past, so different from her happy childhood although later overshadowed by the height of a civil war as a teenager, but definitely different from growing up in Tony Stark's mansions and summer houses, or surrounded by family lunches like Bruce Banner or Thor. If anything, your childhood was closer to that of a Black Widow, with training and punishments whenever the expectations were not achieved. 

Still, Wanda warmed her way into your heart, and you tried to give back as best you could.

"I don't really think about you when I'm away." Her expression drops immediately, but before she can conclude anything, you move one of your hands to grab hers, and bring it back inside your blouse. Your intense gaze is the only thing stopping her from pulling away. And when Wanda can feel a new scar near your abdomen, she swallows dryly. "Or rather, I just have to force myself not to do anymore. What you're feeling happened in Berlin. An MK2 hidden in the belt of an arms dealer who asked me... how much I was enjoying America." You narrate, and Wanda frowns, being able to visualize the memory fresh in your mind. You swallowed and looked down at your lap. "I don't know how much he knew, but he said your name, and I just... flinched. I was blinded by rage and he took advantage of it. So, no, Wanda. I can't afford to let you cross my mind when I'm away, because you become a weakness. And I wasn't trained to have weaknesses."

Despite the way her body warms to the confession, Wanda gives you a playful look.

"Should I apologize, you know, for making a romantic out of the grumpy assassin?" she teases, and you chuckle, spinning her around in a tug to drop her on her back on the bed, you on top. 

With your body pressed into hers, one hand on her waist and the other adjusting her hair away from her eyes, you nuzzle your noses together. "Don't ever apologize for making me feel this way." You whisper, and Wanda closes her eyes in anticipation, her cheeks burning. "You have me in a way that no one ever could, Wanda Maximoff."

The next kiss is intense and charged with meaning. It makes Wanda shudder and gasp into your mouth. You smile, secretly proud of the effect you have on her, while your hands move down to pull her thighs up and make her wrap herself around you, ankles locked behind your knees.

The position elicits a deep moan from the girl beneath you, and when you adjust yourself to press your pelvis against her, Wanda chokes in surprise, opening her eyes.

"Is that...?"

Without losing your relaxed posture, you offer her a little smile full of the worst intentions. "I thought I'd play differently today." You reply, grinding gently against her and making Wanda bite her lips. The movement leaves you equally affected, but you let her know: "I can always change back..."

Wanda tightens the grip of her legs around you, shaking her head. Her cheeks turn pink. "N-no! I like... I like you either way." She manages to whisper, and you smile warmly, kissing her softly. 

One of your hands comes down to invade her blouse, starting an intense making-out session between you, enough to mess up your hair and the bed sheets and leave you hard against her thigh.

When Wanda stops to breathe again, there's a wet spot on the thigh she's spent the last few minutes grinding against - and you take the opportunity to plant kisses on her collarbone. Your hands go down to unbutton your pants.

Between kisses, you warn her: "I have to be careful... I think it works like a real one. Speaking of biological functions, you know. "

She uses magic to force your pants down to your ankles, aroused enough that the delay was driving her to the brink of insanity. Still, she manages to gasp between kisses: "You think?"

You hum, distracted by the sensation of your cock rubbing against her covered intimacy - body shuddering with arousal. "Y-yes... I've never... used it for sex before... Just for the job, you know? While in disguise."

The information made Wanda need to ignore the liquid arousal and press trembling hands onto your shoulders, gently pushing you away and attracting your attention.

After a sigh, she asked: "Are you comfortable, darling? With this of course... I don't know the exact feel of your powers, but I don't want you to think you need to change a single thing about yourself for me. Who you are is incredible and enough."

You break into a loving sigh and attack her face with kisses that make Wanda giggle shyly. "You're too sweet on me, Maximoff." You tease, and wrap your arms around her on the bed, hugging her tightly. Wanda bites her lips, still well aware of your lust brushing her, but trying to ignore the sensation in case you change your mind. After all, just your presence after so many weeks away was what she really wanted. Sex was just a bonus. 

Somehow, she ends up on top again, your foreheads touching. 

"It's different because of my powers, everything they do for me, changing my body as needed, you know? But still, I feel that even without these abilities, these details wouldn't make any difference to me." You confess with a sigh, one of your hands stroking behind her back. "Whether my body resembles of a boy or a girl, I say. In my head, I'm always in the middle, or outside of it. I can't explain it very well, and I’m still trying to understand it better but… I know for a certain that I want to make you feel good. In any of the ways I’m able to."

Wanda absorbs your words for a moment, her heart pounding and her chest warm with tenderness. She doesn't know exactly when she fell for you - whether it was from the first second your eyes met, or whether it was over time, between flirtations and arguments, until finally, she had the courage to act on those feelings and was lucky that you held on to them as much as she did.

Instead of answering with words, she kisses your skin. Your cheeks, your jaw, and your lips, while her hands touch wherever they can. It takes you by surprise, the familiar sensation of her magic on your clothes until you're both skin to skin on the mattress. Wanda sighs deeply, still with her eyes closed, as she adjusts herself on your lap, but looks up at you again before shifting to fit into you.

"Are you ready, love?" You whisper against her lips, one hand on her waist, the other lining up at her warm entrance. Wanda welcomes you with breathtaking heat - you slide in easily, yet she gasps until she gets used to the sensation of being filled, her hands firmly on your shoulders. You sigh too, trying not to get lost in the sensation as you ask: "Can I move?"

"Y-yes, please." She practically meows impatiently, her forehead falling against your shoulder as your hips move upwards, gently thrusting inside her. But Wanda clenches inside, hot and eager, and you grunt, trying to hold in your own pleasure. She grinds down against your hips, the sound of her wet arousal echoing between you. Your hands tighten on her hips, and you gradually increase the speed, making Wanda gasp between moans against your ear. "Dorogoy... that feels so good..."

You manage to gasp back, nodding softly in agreement: "You have no idea how amazing you feel, baby... so fucking wonderful... God..." It takes you by surprise, the first reach of your climax. You try to hold back, but Wanda bites your skin hard as she feels the warm shot on her walls, and your grunt turns into a heavy moan as you spill inside her. Wanda wraps her arms around your shoulders, grinding gently as you throb out the last drops, which soon run down her thighs.  A moment later, your voice hoarse, you whisper: "I'm sorry, babe. I didn’t... know it would be so hard to hold it..."

She giggles shyly, kissing your skin before looking at you again. A mischievous gaze. "Do you need a break, or perhaps that was the highlight of the night...?" She teases, but you snort in fake indignation, fixing your grip on her waist to flip her onto the bed. The gasp of surprise turns into a muffled whimper as you thrust inside her powerfully, hard again as if you hadn't just come. Her hands move to your waist, and her nails dig into your hips with each thrust.

"You were saying?" You challenge softly, panting against her lips. Wanda chuckles under her breath, one of her legs tucking behind yours, increasing your reach deep inside her. With each thrust in, she shuddered and gasped on the bed, closer and closer to the edge. You lowered yourself completely, pinning her to the mattress and burying yourself inside her as you felt her become impossibly tight. Wanda came in a high-pitched whimper, her nails digging into your lower back just enough to make a mark. You kissed her jaw, rocking gently as she still rode the waves of her own climax.

When you suddenly pulled out, cumming against her soaked and abused pussy, she mewed in protest, her leg trying to pull down and back inside of her. You chuckled hoarsely.

"Baby, I shouldn't have come inside the first time." You whispered, kissing her cheek. "I have to be careful, it's not replication, I transform truly. Let's get you a pill after this, all right? And we'll need some condoms for next-."

"Problems for later." Wanda cuts in good-naturedly, pulling your face back to hers and kissing you intently, effectively silencing any rational thought in your head.

It's honestly the best you've felt in a long time - as it usually is when you're around Wanda Maximoff.

It shouldn't surprise you that much when a few hours of rolling around in bed together, the moment is interrupted by knocks on the door.

Wanda, naked and panting, is sitting on your hips, and you're inside her still, ready to come again when she practically jumps away, and you have to muffle the grumble of frustration against her pillow.

"Y-yeah?" she manages to ask the visitor, sitting on shaky knees on the bed, one hand pulling the covers over her body. 

It takes a moment, but the male voice answers: "Sorry to disturb you, Wanda, but I made dinner. Won't you join me?"

She pushes the fingers you threaten to drag between her legs away, a smile playing on her lips.

"I'm not hungry, Vision, thank you."

There's another pause, in which Wanda throws you warning glances to stop trying to touch her before the robot speaks again, more seriously than before.

"Wanda, can we talk? Please."

She frowns, and exchanges a look with you, who sigh, rolling your eyes and looking away, your chest burning with a strange sensation. Using magic to bring one of the robes to her after muttering "One second", Wanda stumbles to the bedroom door, which she leaves with only a small gap to the corridor.

"Vis, it's not a good time-

"She shouldn't be here, Wanda." Vis cuts in, and you tense up on the bed. But he makes no mention of entering the room, and Wanda comes out wrapped in her robe, covering the ajar door with her body as a dry laugh escapes her.

"That's none of your business."

The man shakes his head in disbelief, and his tone of voice, although restrained, can be heard by you inside the room.

"Wanda, please be rational." He insists seriously. "At such a delicate moment for the Avengers, to bring... a criminal into the tower..."

"Vision, go away."

He sighs, hesitantly. "I should report this." He mutters, and although you can't see Wanda's face, you can see the way her shoulders tense and you can imagine the hardness of her expression.

"Do as you wish, but know, I will never speak to you again if anything happens to her."

Vision shakes his head. "And where do you think their choices will lead? If it's not the Avengers, it'll be the police who capture her. Interpol, or whichever organization finds her first. What they're doing, Wanda, has no future and you know it." He says, sighing in disapproval. "Send her away now, or I'll warn the others." Vision announces at last.

"Maybe I'll just go with her." Wanda retorts, but Vision chuckles dryly.

"You have no idea what's happening outside those walls, Wanda." He retorts seriously. "The fine line we're on. Mr. Stark is trying to keep everyone out of danger, and after everything we caused in Lagos,  wandering around without signing the Accords is out of the question."

Wanda chokes in surprise. "What... Am I not allowed to leave the tower?"

Vision clears his throat, nodding. "It's for the safety of the civilians." He retorts coldly. "Although I believe your intentions are good now, your record as a Hydra terrorist and recent events are not in your favor. It's best, for everyone, that you stay here until things settle down and all the signatures are counted."

Wanda is speechless at the absurdity, but in the meantime, you're already dressed and she jumps softly when your hand opens the rest of the door. Vision's eyes go wide, but you just give him a forced smile.

"Hey, microwave, long time no see." You greet sarcastically, and the man adjusts himself.

"Unfortunately not long enough." He retorts coldly. 

"Jeez, someone's rusty." You grumble, but he looks at you seriously.

"Don't abuse my patience, Miss. You have fifteen minutes to leave this tower, or I'll call National Security with your location."

You rest your arm on Wanda's shoulder, a smile playing on your lips. "Wow, am I that important?"

Vision takes a hard step forward, but Wanda's magic pushes him back with a jolt. You laugh at his indignant expression.

"That's enough, Vision. She's leaving soon, and you're leaving now." Wanda warns, at last, her irises bright red. The synthesizer begrudgingly gives you one last threatening look and leaves the corridor. 

You wrap your arms around Wanda again to kiss her hard as you close the door with your foot, but she doesn't match the intensity, and soon, her hands are on your shoulders, gently pushing you away and stopping the kiss. 

At your confused expression, she swallows dryly. "You should go." She whispers, fear in her eyes. "I know he meant it. And I don't want to ruin this night with you getting shot by some federal agent."

You hesitate, but end up nodding, kissing her on the cheek before walking away to get your shoes.

But as you put them on, and Wanda hugs her own body, you take a chance:

"You know you don't have to stay here, right?" You begin a little upset. "You could do like that archer guy and ask for a retirement. Or have your friends forgotten that you've already saved the world once and therefore, you don’t owe any of them shit?"

Despite the childish stubbornness in your tone, Wanda smiles sadly before retorting. "I don't think they've forgotten, but things are more complicated than before. And I'm not like Clint Barton, darling." She retorts, swallowing dryly. "I don't have a family to go back to."

You frown, absorbing the words in silence as you finish tying your sneakers. And then, as if it wasn't the sweetest thoughtful thing you've ever said to her, you declare:

"I could be family, Wanda."

She looks away for a moment because she doesn't want to cry in front of you. She has the impression that you won't leave - and she needs you to go so that you can be safe - if you notice the tears. 

Sniffling softly, and wiping her face before you notice, Wanda asks. "Do you really mean that?"

You stand up, moving closer to her to hold her cheeks. "Every word." You assure her with a smile. "We could travel the world, and have lunch and dinner in different places every day. We would buy all the most expensive and tacky things just because we can..."

Wanda giggles shyly at the fantasy, allowing herself to believe it for just half a second. She holds your hands cupped around her face afterward and sighs.

"It's a beautiful dream, darling."

You swallow dryly, staring at her. "Just a dream, isn't it?" You sigh sadly, and she nods just as upset.

Her tone is very low, like a secret. "They'll find you eventually. And I... God knows how much my power will grow. I can't trust myself outside of here, without the help of training. Stark's containment plans. And I know it's horrible, but I don't want to hurt anyone. Ever again. And if I went with you, with this life you lead, eventually, I would."

You swallow dry, sighing in understanding. This time, it's you who sniffles.

“I’m always one call away, Wanda Maximoff. Whenever you need me, just pick up the phone.” Wanda feels her chest warm at your words, but all she does is smile tenderly against the kiss you place on her lips. 

Unknown to both of you, it won’t take long for her to call. With really unexpected big news.

Two of them precisely.

-&-

This work was turned into a series. Check the masterlist here.

#wanda maximoff x reader #wanda x reader #elizabeth olsen x reader #marvel imagines #kinktober 2023

[gyeomsweetgyeom]

⋆⭒˚.⋆ your biggest fan ⋆⭒˚.⋆

idol!jaehyun x popstar!reader

summary: in which the world discovers your relationship with Jaehyun and surprisingly… they love it

(cw: f!reader, descriptions of sasaengs and receiving hate)

a/n: bonus ig posts at the end

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

You weren't exactly sure how you and Jaehyun became a couple, that was his area of expertise, not yours. All you remembered was meeting him in 2019 at the iHeartRadio Jingle Ball and from there a relationship blossomed at some point.

It was hard on the both of you, you were both so busy. He was busy pumping out music every year, always working. If he wasn't touring, he was recording, promoting, learning a new dance, or working on the next step. The life of a Kpop idol was vastly different from the fame you knew as a western artist. You had breaks between albums, a few singles here and there, but your tours lasted so much longer.

It was a reality you were used to though. You came into the limelight as a teenager, building a deeply dedicated fan base that grew in size and grew up with you. A fanbase that grew from your hometown to spanning various continents. Your success and fame had grown far beyond what you had ever imagined when you first signed on to create your first record. This life was everything you dreamed of and more, even if the reality was less... perfect than you thought it would be.

Having been in this industry for as long as you had been, a romantic relationship wasn't at the forefront of your list. There were a few here and there, kept under wraps, but they could never understand the demands of your job. When Jaehyun came in, he turned your world upside down. He was a breath of fresh air and inspired you more than anyone ever had.

It had been 3 years of dating now. You were head over heels in love and so was he. The time differences, the constant missed calls, and dates in the cover of darkness hadn't diminished any of the love you had for each other.

These past few weeks had been lucky, you were in your Asian leg of your tour and Jaehyun had been able to join you for the last week of your tour which was starting with a few nights in Seoul and ending in Japan. It was the night before your concert, definitely past midnight, but you and Jaehyun were hungry. You were both dressed "in disguise" with masks on, hats covering your heads, and baggier clothes.

It really was a mistake on both your ends to think that there would be no one watching. Sure, the traditional paparazzi wasn't really a thing here, but there were other people with cameras. People who were too dedicated and a... different kind of fan that you and Jaehyun were unfortunately familiar with. These people knew where you were staying and would take any opportunity to catch a picture. And that’s what happened.

You both entered a convenience store and you pulled off your hat to fix your hair which left your face more visible to the cameras taking pictures. A few minutes later Jaehyun lowered his mask to take a drink from his cup and from there your relationship was revealed and spiraled out of control.

Fans were making connections, some far reaching and others that were legitimate. In your short, 20 minute trip down the block both you and Jaehyun were trending. You didn’t even know it was all happening until the morning after when your assistant walked into your hotel room with her phone in her hand that was quickly pushed in front of your face.

You scrolled through hundreds of tweets, replies, quote tweets, various hashtags.

Your voice was tired and deep from sleep, “what is happening?”

“Fans caught you two in the convenience store last night and uploaded the picture. Jaehyun our team have been in touch with your management and we’ve agreed to each put out a statement confirming the relationship. I know this isn’t what either of you had planned, but you were lucky for a good few years,” your assistant explained with a soft smile.

Jaehyun turned to you with a nervous expression, “I’m sorry this happened. Just ignore all the negative comments and focus on the good, okay? I love you and this won’t change anything.”

“I’m sorry, but there’s no negatives. Well sure, haters are everywhere but 99% of the posts, comments, reactions, everything really- is positive. You’re both international stars with very dedicated fan bases that have some intersection. Seriously, look for yourself,” your assistant hands her phone to Jaehyun. “People want duets, joint tours, they want interviews together. Seriously, it’s crazy!”

You laugh I shock, looking over Jaehyun’s shoulder to read all the feedback and comments from your fans.

“We have to improve your Korean, baby. They want you to collaborate with NCT,” Jaehyun laughs.

“You told me my Korean was good!” You exclaim with a soft hit to his arm.

“It is! But we can practice more for a whole album full of duets,” he replies with a soft laugh.

“You’re getting ahead of yourself,” you laugh in reply.

That night at your concert, the arena full of fans erupts in cheers so loud you can hear it through your ear pieces when Jaehyun is shown on the screen. “My boyfriend is here tonight! And we can all thank him for my amazing Korean! Before we start the next song, which is about him, how do we all feel about an extra show here?”

The screams get even louder and you look at Jaehyun with a bright smile. He sends you a finger heart and you send a kiss right back in his direction. This was everything you’d dreamt of.

+ BONUS

yourusername

liked by _jeongjaehyun, zendaya, and others

yoursusername in case you somehow managed to miss the news, here’s the confirmation! my inspiration, my muse, my biggest fan, my love, nobody gets me like you do. I’m so lucky to live this life with someone who gets me better than anyone else. i love you foreverrrrrr

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_jeongjaehyun

liked by yourusername, bumkeyk, and others

_jeongjaehyun Sometimes I still can’t believe it myself. I’ve learned so much from you and continue to learn something new everyday. I’m my best self around you. I love you baby, I’m your biggest fan

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#kpop imagines #kpop au #kpop scenarios #kpop reactions #nct #nct imagines #nct fluff #nct x reader #nct drabbles #jaehyun imagines #jaehyun x reader #jaehyun fluff #jaehyun drabbles #jaehyun blurb #jaehyun scenarios

[stxr-slut]

Sirius x slytherin!reader who grew up together, him, regulus, and reader used to be inseparable.

Then sirius got sorted into gryffindor.

Sure, they still talked every once in a while, said hey when they passed in the halls.

Until he stopped. He stopped smiling back, stopped waving at her, stopped caring all together.

Regulus was so caught up in trying to fill the crack that sirius left in his family that he forgot about her too.

She feels abandoned, alone, unwanted. The two boys she grew up with were forgetting her, moving on to bigger things, and she was left behind.

Until one day, she sees sirius again, but it doesn't turn out how she thought it would. He doesn't apologise and take her away from her equally shitty family, as she'd always dreamed he would.

He sneaks into her dorm room late at night, talks her out of her clothes, and when she wakes up, it's to him sneaking back out. Whispering something about it being 'their secret'.

And so they contine like that. He's too blind to see he's hurting her, and she's too desperate to care.

She sees him around school but doesn't dare to say hi. She doesn't fit in with his new friends, with his new life. She's just a bad habit he can't be bothered to kick.

And it stings. It sends a sharp pain through her heart every time they make eyecontact at dinner, and he instantly turns away. He can't even risk looking at her.

And of course she's not the only one. She knows that. She sees him at parties, openly making out with other girls. Never her.

So she starts plotting. It starts off small, sending notes or sneaky hexes to girls interested in him, scaring them off without them ever knowing who it was.

Then, it was small inconveniences to his day. Hiding his books, sabotaging his homework, spreading a rumour. She knew it was hurting him, but it got him back in her bed at the end of the day.

And then it all got out of control. He started to slowly pull away, despite her best efforts to draw him back in, the small things weren't working anymore.

So she went bigger, messier. And then she slipped. He figured it out.

She was behind all the frustrating little things that made his life worse. She was behind the rumours and the lies and the things she didn't even care was hurting him.

And so it all comes to a front. Screaming, crying, accusations, insults. It's a mess of angst and hurt and pent-up emotions.

She's yelling about how he left her behind. How he forgot her and used her and how she'd struggled without him.

He's yelling about how she's needy and pathetic, and she could've ruined his life. How she needs to let go of the past. They were kids, for fuck sake.

He didn't need her anymore, but she still needed him.

#cassies thoughts !! ☆▪︎☆ #marauders #marauders era #sirius black x reader #sirius black x slytherin!reader #sirius black x childhood friend!reader #sirius black x reader angst #sirius black #sirius black fic #sirius black angst #toxic!sirius black #toxic relationship

[skyscrapergods]

in your au is zecora an earth pony, or does a different species such as a zebra or something closer to donkeys/asses exist? how does zecora, coming from a foreign land, feel about giant gods walking around everywhere - is this a new sight for her, a complete surprise or perhaps something whispered about in tales in her lands, or is there something similar to living, giant where she is from and in other regions as well?

There are many sentient species in the world beyond the main 3 "ponies" which are not all equines. Earth ponies are horses, unicorns are a species of deer, and pegasus share a common ancestor with griffins.

Horses, pegasus, and unicorns are only considered one species socially, because they can interbreed due to compatible chromosomes. However, the foal will always be either a horse, pegasus, or unicorn with no physical traits from the other species. It will be fully one thing or another, as will its children.

Zebras and donkeys are not earth ponies (horses) but they are closely related enough that they can hybridize with them. Non-horse "ponies" (pegasus and unicorns) cannot hybridize with zebras/donkeys. Hybrid offspring within the equines are sterile.

Unicorns can breed freely with horses and pegasus, as well as their relatives, the Kirin. Kirin/unicorn hybrids are sterile. They cannot breed with zebras/donkeys/griffins.

Pegasus can breed freely with horses and unicorns, but cannot breed with kirin, zebras, or donkeys. Pegasus can breed with griffins, and their offspring are known as hippogriffs, which are not sterile and have grown to create an entire new species. They have hybrid vigor and grow larger than either of their ancestor species.

Zecora is not surprised to see Celestia, as she carries the sun around the entire planet, including her home continent. Celestia is known through the world, and worshiped in some way or another through most of it.

Before and after her imprisonment in the moon, Luna is also known throughout the world as the bringer of night and keeper of dreams.

There are other gods besides alicorns. In Zecora's homeland, there are four great trees that stretch into the sky. These trees are actually the legs of Boabab, God of Life. Many thousand years ago, Boabab walked among Zecora's people, before its long neck stretched into the heavens to look for life among the stars. This god is much older and taller than Celestia, so Zecora was not particularly overwhelmed upon seeing her or any of the smaller princesses.

Other regions also have gods, but ponies tend to only care about equestria and often do not believe other species are important enough to become gods.

#skyscraper gods #skyscraper gods lore #ask #genetics #giraffe god canon #boabab #zecora lore #ssg zecora #ssg boabab #ssg gods #ssg genetics

[bloodslust]

𝐨𝐨𝐨. GIRLFRIEND HC ! ; jill valentine

. ft. j. valentine

. content. f!reader , fluff , angst , smut

. note. my fav girl ever

. links. masterlist

Girlfriend!Jill whos gaze softens when her deep blues meet yours, whether you be directly beside her or across opposite ends of the room. She can't help the way her furrowed brows ease at your sweet smile, and the way her frowns turns into a miniature smile when your laugh echos through the room.

Girlfriend!Jill whos never thought of having a family of her own, especially not with her occupation and constant terror of horrible foes finding you and harming you in a way to get to Jill, but the second she sees you helping a small child find their mother, or holding your friend's baby ever so gently, she can't help but crave a domestic, joyful lifestyle with you.

Girlfriend!Jill, who hates the disgusting scar on her chest, a reoccurring reminder of what she did, and the people she harmed in the process. Repeated, continous nightmares of all those disgraceful crimes she did, despite being controlled by an equally deplorable man.

Girlfriend!Jill who tosses and turns in her troublesome sleep, eyes scrunched tightly, and brown brows knitted uncomfortably. Cautious, delicate hands shaking her awake, nursing her name in an anxious whisper, desperate to pry her out of her violent dreams quickly. The panicked look on her face only lasts a brief second before her pale faces soften at your face, looking at hers worriedly.

Girlfriend!Jill who wouldn't really know how to stabilise herself again if she lost you. You, precious you, who saved her from her circular, repeated cycle of daily life; shaking her life up and bringing a whole new concept of life to her.

Girlfriend!Jill who loves to lay in your shared comfortable bed, nestled under the sheets with your head laid on her chest. Focusing too hard on matching her breathing to yours, she almost forgot how to breathe.

Girlfriend!Jill who lets you sit so pretty on her thigh as she works by the wooden desk in the home study. A hand reaching around yours to grab a pen, flexing her thigh against your skin. Sending a quick glance your way before her knee slowly begins to bounce almost teasingly, watching your reaction out of the corner of her blue eyes.

Girlfriend!Jill who tries to always be such a sweetheart during sex, but sometimes can't help but let all of her pent-up stress get to her, pounding into you with her strap as she grumbles and complains lowly.

Girlfriend!Jill who stretches you out so, so good with her rough fingers. Only needing two before she has you whining and moaning for more, threading your hands through her chocolate her while she holds a small grin on her face in triumphant.

Girlfriend!Jill who just holds so much love for you, wishing to grow old with you despite the unlikeliest that you'll actually stay in her life. After all, it was always her job that tore the people she loved most away from her.

© ORIGINAL WORK BY bloodslust. CHARACTERS ARE INSPIRED BY CAPCOM'S RESIDENT EVIL. [2024]

#jill valentine #jill valentine x reader #jill valentine x you #resident evil #resident evil x reader #resident evil x you #resident evil fanfiction #dazlynwrites

[holylulusworld]

Designed by pain (1)

Summary: Broken hearts are hard to put back together. 8 years ago, Dean lost something he didn’t even know he had in the first place. Will he get a second chance?

Pairing: former AU!Dean Winchester x fem!Reader; Arthur Ketch x fem!Reader

Warnings: angst, language, implied break-up, time jumps, strong reader, Dean being a douche (implied), unplanned pregnancy

A/N: This was an alternative idea for the first chapter of my Bucky story: Monster-in-law masterlist. I decided to use it for a story with Dean.

Designed by pain masterlist

Designed by pain (Prologue)

One night of passion, a life-long responsibility. The words you wrote echo in your mind. It’s only a few days since you left Dean and the house, but you are already falling apart. 

You spent the better part of the drive back to your shared home being scared of the future. 

Having a baby so soon into your relationship wasn’t in your plans. Neither was it to raise the child alone. Even though you know, there is no way you’ll not love the life growing inside your body.

“Fuck, what do I do now?” You slam the door shut behind you and immediately sink to your knees. You choke out a sob and hide your face in the palms of your hands. 

Six days and Dean didn’t even try to call you, nor did he come home. 

He’s over you already, and Lisa will take your place. Maybe it never was your place. You were only a placeholder until she came back into the picture.

You grit your teeth and huff. “Fuck you, Dean Winchester.” Something breaks inside of you, and you don’t know if it’s a bad thing. 

The part of you loving Dean unconditionally already starts to fade, and the bitch in the back of your mind taking over whenever you got hurt wins the upper hand.

You straighten your back and look at the woman in the mirror staring back at you. You smirk and put your hands on your hips. “I guess this means we are going to leave and start all over again. Don’t worry little bean,” you lovingly run your hand over your belly, “we are going to fucking rock this…”

One last step and your new life can begin. This is it, the point of no return. Your life with Dean is over, and you are not even sorry anymore.

You gave him time and space to realize what he was about to lose. In the end, you and his baby weren’t important enough to him to even try to talk things out.

Even if he didn’t want to be in a relationship with you any longer, he could’ve at least tried to be a father to his child.

Now you will be a father and mother to the bean growing in your belly. You’re strong and won’t back down, or cry over spilled milk.

If you look back at this moment in a few years, you will clap your hands and cheer for yourself. You’re stronger than Dean or anyone else gave you credit for. Everyone believed you’re only the cheerful and soft girl who loves to bake cookies and dreams of marrying the man you love.

A week ago, you were this person. 

Today you are someone else. An Amazon, who will take her life in her hands and move on from a man who never loved her…

The takeoff is both exciting and terrifying. You are flying to another country, to live on another continent. Your old life will be in the past, and you can only think about the future from now on. 

Holding your old plushie in your hands, squeezing it tightly you take deep breaths. “In and out,” you tell yourself to calm your nerves. Flying always makes you nervous. This didn’t change.

“How do you like first class, Miss Y/L/N,” your new boss asks. He paid for a first-class ticket so you could talk about your new position and the house he rented for you.

“Thank you for inviting me,” you give him a quick smile. Arthur Ketch is a very polite and charming man, but you cannot appreciate him at the moment. 

“I have to thank you for accepting our job offer,” he says and dips his head to watch you nervously run your hand over your belly. “How far are you?”

“Oh—” heat creeps into your cheeks. You should’ve told him that you were pregnant before accepting his company’s offer. “I…I should’ve told you.”

“Most of our employees are mothers and fathers, Y/N. We are a family-friendly company with family-friendly work conditions. And the boss likes you, and your reputation.” He smirks now and leans closer to look at your belly.

“Do you think he’ll like that I didn’t tell them about my pregnancy? I didn’t do it on purpose. I got to know about my pregnancy only a few days ago, and I didn’t intend to accept the job offer at that time.”

“You know that I’m the boss, right?” Ketch grins. 

“You are the boss now?” Your eyes round. “Since when?”

He shrugs. “I was the one behind the job offer. Robert Singer talked highly about you when we last met. From that moment on, I wanted you to work for us. If I told you back then that I was the CEO of the BMOL you would’ve never accepted our offer.”

“So, you tricked me,” you chuckle. “Lately all men seem to lie to me.” You sigh deeply. “Sorry, that was inappropriate. I didn’t want to…” You sniff. “Sorry.”

“You accepted my job offer because of a bad break-up I assume,” he pats your hand. “It’s alright, Y/N. London is the perfect place to start over. I will show you the town, and help you settle in. If you need help, I’ll be there. We care for our employees.”

“Is that a British thing?” You quirk a brow.

“It’s an Arthur Ketch thing,” he replies. “If you ask me, he’s a fool for letting you go. Sorry. Now I was the one saying inappropriate things, Y/N. You can punch me if you want to.”

“No, you’re right,” you hastily reply. “I gave him a choice, but he just gave up on us after meeting his ex-girlfriend again. The job offer was tempting, but I couldn’t imagine leaving the man I love. He made things so much easier for me. I got a new job and a new life. Maybe I should thank him for being the douche he is.”

“You deserve better,” Ketch softly says. “I know that we barely know each other, but believe me, he’s not worth a single tear. A gentleman should never make a woman cry or hurt her. Especially the one carrying his child.”

You give Ketch a sad smile. You’re embarrassed how easily he saw right through you. It wasn’t your intention to talk about your pregnancy and broken heart with your new boss.

“Y/N don’t worry. Everything we talked about today won’t leave this airplane,” he pats your hand. “If you need a friend, I’ll be there…”

Part 2

#dean winchester #dean x reader #dean winchester fanfic #dean winchester x reader #angst #dean winchester x you #Designed by pain (1) #au!dean winchester #tw: pregnancy

[anashins]

His Love in Her Force

Pairing: undercover detective!Jaehyun x ballerina!reader

Genre: fake marriage au, hate to love, action, drama, fluff, romance, small town au, slow burn, smut, suspense

Word Count: 28k (it's worth it if you like slow burn, promise)

Summary: Fleeing from a ruthless stalker, you are forced to participate in a witness protection program at the other side of the world, pretending to be the wife of a taciturn undercover detective from now on. Despite all differences, you slowly start to settle with your new life as a married couple - until your newfound happiness is stripped away from you all over again.

A/N: Loosely inspired by a friend's friend case that went viral where I live. Jaehyun goes by several names here (Jay Jung, Jung Jaehyun and Jeong Yuno).

Imagine leaving everything behind. 

Your home, your friends, your family.

Life as you knew it, vanished overnight, and you had to start anew at the other side of the world.

People easily let such a wish slip when their ordinary life got too exhausting. But what many truly meant was that they wanted to take a break from their daily routine and relax a few weeks under the tropical sun. 

They could always come back to the security and comfort of their stable home, and that was why only the minority was serious and courageous enough to actually go through with the plans of starting anew somewhere far away.

And then, there were people like you. The ones who didn’t have a choice.

“Mrs. Jung, please put up your table, we’re starting to descend,” the stewardess told you.

Mrs. Jung. That was your new name now. 

You had no relation to this surname that you had gotten assigned to only sixteen hours ago through a fake ID and passport at the airport. It sounded so foreign and disturbing to your ears. 

This “Mrs. Jung” wasn’t you, yet you had to slip into her role and pretend to have been someone else’s wife for a significant part of your life already. It was a role you didn’t deem yourself to be suitable for at all.

You were a young, single woman who lived her childhood dream of being a ballet dancer. After having attended different dance academies around Asia and Europe, you had settled with your first engagement, the Korea National Ballet, back in Seoul for the meantime where your family was residing.

A week ago, you had gotten the confirmation letter that you were accepted into the Dutch National Ballet after having studied there the year prior.

Your life was finally everything you had been working so hard towards since you were little.

And then, your future had gotten stripped away from you. Just like that.

“Mrs. Jung?” The stewardess passed by again. “The table.”

“Oh sorry,” you quickly apologized and put it up to properly lock it.

You then proceeded to stare out of the window, the plane having brought you to a continent you had never set foot on ever before. Narrow streets, tiny houses and small forests passed by you in a blur of earthly colors as the plane slowly angled downwards to start its final descent. 

You hated your new life already.

_____

“My duty here is finished,” the officer, who had been accompanying you all the way to the US, told you. “I’ll be taking the next flight back. But no worries, a driver is already waiting for you and will escort you to your new home. You must be relieved, you’re almost there now, Miss.”

“Relieved, detective?” you mocked and crossed your arms in front of your chest. “I’ll be exchanging the life of a successful ballerina for the one of a housewife, stuck in the nowhere on the other side of the world, because you couldn’t do your job right. What in the hell should I be relieved about, tell me?”

“Listen, Miss.” He lowered his voice as though there were other people besides you in this domestic charter flight. “Detective Jeong is one of our best people for this job here, I heard. So when it’s about life or death, there is no other place you’d rather be at the moment. He surely wants to be elsewhere as well, so that makes you two people that have to arrange themselves with this situation.”

“Jeong?” You raised a brow. “Isn’t his name Jung also?”

“Your fake name applies to the both of you of course. It’s a fine, but grave detail to his real one, also for easier spelling. Don’t ever use it in front of anyone though.”

You barely listened to him. “I don’t care. I don’t care about any of this.”

“I’m sorry this happened to you, really.” He sounded almost empathetic. Almost. 

“Don’t be, I know that deep inside, you aren’t. You think you did a good job, detective. If you wouldn’t have sat on your asses all day long and laid out all my collected evidences properly instead, I wouldn’t even be here on this stupid plane, in this stupid country!”

“I already told you there is nothing that we can do anymore, Miss. Stalking cases, where the suspect hasn’t done any harm yet, are always hard to handle since not everything can be considered solid evidence. That’s the thing with social media.” He was tired of leading this conversation, but you weren’t, because you knew you were right. “Besides… The judge hasn’t even passed the sentence yet.”

“But they’re close, and we all know what the sentence will be, otherwise I wouldn’t be here! And it’s only because my father pays such a huge amount of money that you’re willing to get me into this program and away from him.” Your heart was full of hostility, and you let him feel every single bit of it. “Otherwise I would possibly be dead by tomorrow.”

“Again, I’m sorry this happened to you, Miss.”

“Screw your half-assed apologies! I’ve lost my trust in the police a long time ago!” you yelled at him. “You’d rather want a woman dead than get a stalker behind bars!”

And, once again, replied with, “I’m sorry, Miss.”

You didn’t want to hear any more of this, so you remained quiet for the rest of the landing approach and just bid an annoyed farewell to the detective when you disembarked the aircraft. By the exit, after you had picked up your luggage, you were welcomed by the announced driver. 

“Hello, Mrs. Jung. I will accompany you to your new home,” he greeted you. “Welcome to Connecticut. Follow me please. Here, let me help you with your luggage.”

You tagged along with a distance of two steps until you got out of the airport and into his car. The ride distanced you from the airport and thus from the next city as well. While you were hoping to cross another town soon, no such thing happened.

“How far is it?” were the words you finally brought out after half an hour of driving. “It’s been quite a while and all I’m still seeing is… green.”

“Oh, it’s still an hour, Mrs. Jung.”

“An hour?” you squealed and sat straight up from the backseat. “Where are we driving to? Maine? This was Connecticut already, how far into the province are we going?”

“Where your persecutor won’t find you that easily, Mrs. Jung.”

You swore to god, if he called you “Mrs. Jung” again, in every sentence… But it was the first time someone used the word “persecutor”, and it kind of caught you off guard to have someone not talk down on your case.

You leaned back in your seat and closed your eyes to relax after such a long flight that also included a layover. It worked out a bit too well in the end though, sleep eventually engulfing you with the mundane sound of the car rolling over the road in the background.

You only woke up much later when the car had already come to a halt. At the outside, when you groggily opened your eyes, you saw two figures talking to each other in front of your side window. One of them was the driver who had brought you here, the other though, you could only make out the outlines of as he stood with his back turned to you, but it was definitely a much taller man.

“Couldn’t you have gotten someone else?” the unfamiliar man spoke. 

“Since when do detectives in your position get to choose the person they will protect?” the driver asked back.

“It’s just… that she’s…” He faltered.

“A young dancer at the peak of her career?”

“Don’t go there.”

At that moment, he turned around to you and your eyes met. You didn’t know who was more shocked to see the other. So that was him, your “husband”. How dare he speak about you like that! As though you were happy over this situation!

Your eyes were wide open now and you aggressively unbuckled your seatbelt. Opening the door, you stepped outside, getting greeted by the driver right away.

“You’re awake, Mrs. Jung! May I introduce you to your husband Jaehyun? Around here, for better pronunciation, he’s known as Jay.”

The unfamiliar man, obviously going by the name of Jaehyun/Jay, said nothing to you, not even during the entire time your eye contact didn’t break. You felt him clearly examining you from head to toe though, but not in the way a guy checked out someone he was interested in.

No, he was eyeing you from head to toe like he was inspecting a piece of leftover meal that he was unsure of whether to still eat after finding it in the very back of his fridge seven days after preparing. He was full of disgust, and his off-putting behavior was masking how ridiculously good he looked at the same time. 

In the end, he decided against the meal and shifted back to the driver. “She’s looking even gaudier than in the pictures.”

“Excuse me?!” You clenched your fists. “What do you mean?!”

But he ignored you. “She’s looking like a Christmas tree, drawing attention to her wherever she goes. So flamboyant.”

“This is called fashion! People in Seoul wear such outfits!” you retorted, upset that he was still treating you like you weren’t there and simultaneously insulting you. 

The driver just patted his shoulder. “I’ll get going.”

When he had driven away, you were left alone with Jaehyun or Jay - if that was even his real name, but you supposed it wasn’t, a fake name like yours and your both’s surname most likely as well. 

You stood there kind of awkwardly in the small driveway of the house you needed to call your new home from now on. Judging from the outside, admittedly, it looked like a cozy country style bungalow, spacious enough for two people and with no other houses in the immediate radius. 

You would have liked it very much for a short vacation if you wouldn’t have to share it with a stranger who apparently didn’t have the hots for you anyway.

“Let’s go inside,” he barked with suppressed anger, and you wondered why he was already behaving so hostile towards you. 

But at least, the feeling was mutual since he was a policeman as well. Starting from the day they had laughed at you when you called 911 shortly after the physical stalking had started, you had vowed to hate every single one of them.

When you stepped through the entry door, heaving the luggage up the stairs yourself, because Jaehyun was not gentleman enough to help you, you were positively surprised. 

The interior was bright and modernly furnished. There was a huge kitchen, open to the living room that looked equally comfortable and cozy with a soft couch. Additionally, there was an entire wall filled with books only at the opposite of the window facade by the entrance.

“The bathroom is over there.” Jaehyun stood next to you and pointed with his finger to one of the two doors behind the kitchen. “And that is the bedroom. No worries, it’s all yours, I’ll sleep on the couch.”

“You better do so,” you murmured and went straight to the bedroom, dragging your luggage behind you.

“You’re not allowed to go outside all alone. Either I accompany you or you ask for my permission and tell me exactly where you go and for how long.”

He spoke like a robot who had memorized an instruction, and who knew, perhaps he was even one. This already felt like jail. Whether you were here or at home, leaving either wouldn’t be safe for you. It didn’t make any difference except that you hated it here. And him.

Jaehyun cleared his throat. “I’ll prepare dinner.”

“I’m not hungry.”

You shut the door behind you and looked around in the room before you let yourself fall onto the huge bed and stared at the ceiling. Minutes later, you found yourself crying so hard like you had never cried before in your life. 

Your entire body shook, and you sobbed so loudly, you feared that Jaehyun might hear it. But you actually didn’t care. You would gladly let him know that he wasn’t the only one feeling miserable in this situation you two were in, even though you voiced it differently.

Missing your parents, grandparents, friends and everyone else dear to you, you now realized that you were all alone. You hadn’t been allowed to keep your phone in case you’d be tracked down and thus weren’t allowed to get in touch with anyone from your former life either in case someone accidentally revealed your whereabouts.

Another part of you mourned the end of your career that you had been working so hard towards and that hadn’t even really started yet. This same part hated your father for putting you into this program, but loved him at the same time to go through these lengths to ensure your protection. 

But the biggest part of you hated the man who had laid his eyes on you a year ago and vowed to never leave your side again in the most controversial ways. 

The man who had ruined your life. 

This was what he had wanted for you - cornered, shut off, frightened. When admiration turned into hatred, there was no space for happiness anymore. You had never felt more agonized. And lonely.

And with this feeling, after your sheets were all wet from too much crying, you slept in long after night had fallen.

____

The ringing doorbell woke you up, and judging by the misty light that flowed into the bedroom from the outside, it must not be past nine in the morning. You must have slept for over fourteen hours.

Opening your eyes in a slow manner, it took you a few moments to adjust to your surroundings. At first, you were happy to have woken up in your home again - until you realized it quite wasn’t and reality dawned on you, a dreadful feeling instantly weighing down on your heart that nearly caused you to bawl right there and then again. 

You grabbed a pillow and put it over your face to drown out the noise that was coming from the door. If anything, it was Jaehyun’s responsibility to open it as he was closer to the source, and you weren’t even sure whether you were allowed to let strangers in. 

But the string of constant noise just wouldn’t subside, and jet lag was hitting you hard.

“Goddammit!” you yelled in annoyance, jumped out of the bed and stormed into the living room.

But there was no sign of Jaehyun, the couch neatly made, so no one was even able to suspect that someone had slept on it the night before. You tiptoed to the window close by the entrance door to get a look at the person standing outside. 

It was an old, asian woman with gray hair. 

The moment she spotted you by the window, she quickly hurried over and excitedly signed you to open the door. In her hands, she presented a bag, dangling it in front of your vision. You neither had the time nor the patience to put up with her right now, but since she had spotted you already, there was no chance that you could still avoid her.

“Yes?”

You opened the door, not paying attention to your disheveled hair and the clothes from the day before. Whatever she wanted, you hoped that she would finish fast.

“My, my!” she called out in delight. “You must be Mrs. Jung, having arrived yesterday, right?”

You nodded, still not having adjusted to that name. At least you were fluent in English. “Yes, that’s me. May I help you?”

“I brought you a set of dumplings as a welcome gift. Here, take them. According to the villagers, they taste the best in my restaurant, Mrs. Jung. I’m sure they only say it because I’m running the only restaurant here, though.” She winked and then laughed as you took the package into your hands, slowly waking from your petrification. “Far away from your home country, I thought you needed something familiar, and food always manages to lift the mood, am I right? I must know, because when I immigrated here from Vietnam, I also felt lonely.”

This old woman’s surprising genuine gesture seemed so sweet to you though, you had to gulp big time to hold back your tears that were still present from before. Amidst a sea of turmoil, she radiated so much warmth and grandmotherly love, it made your chest tighten and soothed your pain at the same time, and you regretted your malign thoughts from earlier.

“Thank you so much,” you said wholeheartedly, softly.

“Grandmother Anh!” The two of you simultaneously spotted Jaehyun hurrying in your direction while crossing the front yard. “What are you doing here so early in the morning?”

“I wanted to drop by and bring you a set of dumplings as I remembered your wife must have arrived by now,” she explained and pointed at the bag in your hands. “Freshly made.”

“Thank you so much, grandmother Anh!” He wasn’t paying attention to you. “It wasn’t necessary for you to come all the way up there though!”

She waved aside. “A short trip up to here hasn’t hurt anyone yet, right?”

“You want to come inside for a cup of tea?” you offered her as you deemed it suitable for a situation like this despite not knowing whether you actually had tea. It earned you an angry gaze from Jaehyun though, and you wondered what you had done wrong.

“No worries, dear, I have work to go after now, and I’m sure you want to have some time to adjust yourself to your new living situation. Thank you for the invitation though. And don’t forget to step by my restaurant!”

When she was gone, you retreated to the inside, but as soon as the door closed behind you, Jaehyun threw a fit.

“What the hell were you thinking?” he yelled at you. “Oh, I know! You weren’t even thinking! Opening the door for someone you don’t know, even though you’re currently in a security program, are you nuts?!”

“Of course I’ve looked through the window before!” you shot back at him angrily. Stranger or husband, nobody was allowed to talk to you this way, and in contrast to the day prior, you had enough energy now to give him hell back. “If it was a suspicious looking man, I wouldn’t have let him in, but this was a nice grandma! My stalker is still in detention until the court decision, so he won’t come here so easily, and I doubt he has accomplices in the middle of the american nowhere when he’s just a simple korean man!”

“Listen up here, I’m trying to teach you a point,” Jaehyun pressed through gritted teeth, urging you to move backwards until your feet hit the baseboard and your back rested against the wall. “You know why you’re not allowed to use the phone or the internet? You log yourself into your social media account, congratulations, you just disclosed your location and he’ll appear here once he’s free. You call a friend while being connected to a local radio mast, congratulations, you’re now in danger again, because he’s hired a technician to track your steps. The same goes for people. One tells the other who they’ve seen here, words spread, someone knows someone who knows someone who knows him. Or one of them takes a picture, it lands on the internet, and things on the internet stay on the internet. It will then only be a matter of time until he comes across it. How do you know what he’s capable of? Because he’s ‘a simple korean man’? You’re smarter than this!” For the time he paused and inhaled deeply. “I’m here to prevent all this from happening, to prevent him from finding you, so you have to follow me. Since you’re not known by anyone yet, I have to run a background check, and we still have time to study our story so that they’re going to match. Until then, you’re gonna stay quiet and inside.”

“I didn’t ask you to be my protector!” you defended yourself, his closeness flustering you still. “No one from the police has ever helped me anyway, so stop acting like you care about my wellbeing!”

“Care about your wellbeing?” He revealed his pearl white teeth when he scoffed. “I don’t care about your wellbeing. It’s just that I want to get out of here as fast as possible and you’re just something that holds me back if I don’t take care of it. So you play by my rules or you go back now.”

“You-!” You swallowed the rest of the sentence.

With a slip to the side, you escaped from his fearful presence and crossed the living room in a hurry to lock yourself inside the bedroom again.

Only hours later, when hunger got the better of you, you dared to come out. The dumplings laid on the dining table where you had dropped them off earlier, and you couldn’t ignore the gurgling sounds your stomach was making anymore. 

Jaehyun was sitting on the couch, typing something into his laptop and minding his own business without looking up to you. You were grateful for his ignorance as neither of you wanted to back off from your argument earlier, so you took half of the dumplings and retreated back into the bedroom from where you didn’t come out for the rest of the day.

At night, you cried yourself to sleep again.

____

“Let’s go grocery shopping.”

You were very much surprised when Jaehyun offered to take you on a short trip to the supermarket two days later. Yesterday, you had only been living off leftover dumplings and hadn’t felt any appetite, even until now. This was your very first interaction since the argument.

“I don’t want to,” you blocked it off.

“It’s weird and actually more suspicious when everyone now knows that you’ve already arrived, but don’t show yourself. We have to blend in, that’s how it works here in the countryside. And I have already done a background check on everyone, they’re clean. Besides…” He hesitated. “You should start eating properly.”

You didn’t care about his reasoning as you didn’t want to go out at all. Staying inside, hiding and being left alone sounded like the proper activity according to your mood, but Jaehyun wouldn’t budge, so you had no other choice than to finally dress up and accompany him against your will.

You hadn’t seen anything from the village except for your own house so far, so you got a bit excited when you finally stepped out onto the streets. The sun was shining brightly that morning, and it was kind of comfortably warm already for early spring. 

When you did a 360 degree turn, you silently noted that the village was located on the slope of a hill, your house placed on the highest point and the other houses stretching a few hundred meters apart from each other along the main street and scattering into narrower ones. 

The view and the location were splendid, you had to give credit for that. You weren’t the kind of person to seek this kind of tranquility as you were more a fan of a buzzing city, but somehow, you didn’t find it so bad here. 

The houses were all so small and looked so cozy, embedded and blending in with nature, and the village overall was surrounded by trees and the greens of the connected grasslands that reached to the very top of the mountains.

“If we should come off as a couple, you have to stay by my side.”

You hadn’t noticed how Jaehyun had gone ahead already and quickly fell into his step. You were kind of grossed out by the idea that he would suddenly want to take your hand or do something else that young couples usually openly showed to prove their affection towards each other, so you kept your arms close to your body. But luckily, he didn’t seem to be fond of such a thing right now as well.

As you were walking down the street leading to the village center, Jaehyun told you, “I’ll be starting my work tomorrow. I’m a police officer here, so I’ll be gone for the majority of the day.”

“You work?”

“In contrast to you, I have to.”

“I see,” you noticed curtly. It wasn’t like you minded. No, you rejoiced even!

“But don’t get the wrong idea,” he reminded you as though he was reading your thoughts. “It doesn’t mean you can do what you want and go wherever you want.”

You rolled your eyes. “I understood the first time already.”

“Very well. We’re here,” he then declared when you stood in front of a store, not bigger than a 7/11.

“That’s it? That’s the grocery store?”

“Yeah. What did you expect anyway?”

Yeah, what exactly did you expect to discover in this small village? You sighed. “Let’s go inside.”

A high-pitched voice directly greeted you from the inside. “Mr. Jung! Is this your lovely wife? I can’t believe I finally get to see her! Welcome, Mrs. Jung!” A middle-aged man approached you from the counter, took both of your hands and shook them excitedly. “I’m Mr. Jones. Please help yourselves. You’ll find here everything that you need. My store might be small, but it’s rich in its ingredients.”

You felt Jaehyun’s stares in your back when you carefully greeted him back with a, “Nice to meet you, Mr. Jones” before you went back to his side like the obedient wife you were supposed to play.

Jaehyun was wandering through the small aisles and put one grocery after another into his shopping basket. From afar, he truly looked like a caring husband. But you knew better. 

“What do we want to cook for dinner?” he asked nonchalantly, almost kindly.

For the first time, his voice wasn’t filled with anger or tension that you would also find in your own tone whenever you opened your mouth to speak to each other. In front of the people, you had to conceal your negative feelings towards each other. 

“Hmm…” You looked through the shelves, Jaehyun tagging along. “I’m kind of craving fried rice.”

“I’d rather have steak.” He put the meat in the basket. 

Of course he’d get what he wanted. But you didn’t want to back down either and bought the ingredients for your own cravings.

“Mrs. Jung, please make sure to step by again,” Mr. Jones told you when he packed your groceries. “We always have fresh fruits, you’ll love them!”

You nodded, totally not in the mood for smalltalk with strangers.

Back at home, you waited until Jaehyun had finished preparing his steak before you cooked your own dish. You ate in silence, him on the couch, you in the bedroom, both of you then cleaning after yourselves in silence, too. 

And that slowly became your arranged routine. Silent and separate, yet still together physically.

____

You had spent the past days inside the house mostly, reading, watching TV and staring at the ceiling. At home, you barely had time for these trivial things as you were always practicing, even during your free time. But your free time now was endless, and simple leisure activities prevented you from falling back into this deep, black hole that engulfed you every night, luring out your tears.

You didn’t want to go out, you didn’t want to talk, you barely wanted to eat.

When you felt like this at home, you would just start dancing, but now, you didn’t even have that. Your life was dull after you had been ripped off your passion and your entire future. You didn’t know whether, if you’d ever return, you could catch up again.

At this point, you were asking yourself whether this life was actually worth living. But if you were to give up now, it only meant your stalker had succeeded. This was what he wanted, and you wouldn’t give him this.

As you were lying on the couch that evening again, staring into space, you heard Jaehyun coming home and immediately shot up to go back into your room. You wanted to spend as little time around him as possible.

But he didn’t let you go far. “Mr. Jones saw you in the driveway this morning as he drove by.”

“...And?”

“You know for sure that this isn’t allowed,” Jaehyun hissed sharply. “I prohibited it.”

“But why?” you genuinely wanted to know. “I was only catching some fresh air, nothing to fret about.”

He didn’t show any compassion. “If you want some fresh air, open a window, but, under no circumstances, are you allowed to leave the house when I’m not there. Think about what would have happened if it was someone else driving by, not Mr. Jones!”

“You’re totally nuts!” you yelled now. “And paranoid! That man doesn’t even know I’m here, so technically, I can roam around freely if I want to!”

“This is why I didn’t want you,” Jaehyun growled, his voice full of contempt. “The moment I saw you in the car, I knew what kind of person you would be. And I was proven right. You’re so reckless and neglecting in regard to your own life. On top of that, you’re so audacious as well, and I actually despise people like you. You didn’t even need this program, you’re only here because your father wanted to protect his little princess!”

You froze, and Jaehyun turned stiff in the same breath, your eye contact not breaking despite the interruption. Almost simultaneously, it became clear to you both what he had just said, and the extent of his hurtful words.

Jaehyun opened his lips, his eyes wide in shock. “I-”

The ringing doorbell broke through the distressing silence between the both of you and Jaehyun crossed the living room to hurry to the entrance door.

“Hello Mr. Jung!”

“Grandmother Anh, what a surprise!” he greeted her, still a bit overwhelmed, but trying to downplay the situation. “What brings you here?”

“I was wondering whether you and your wife already have plans for dinner and whether you are interested in joining me and a few other villagers at my restaurant this evening?” she asked politely, trying to get a glimpse of the inside. 

“My wife is doing fine, only still adjusting. There is just so much work to still go after inside the house, so we barely have time at the moment. I’m afraid we have to decline.”

“That’s unfortunate,” the old woman commented. “But I still hope that you can make time this evening and join the dinner. We would be really pleased!”

“I’m going to ask her, alright?”

“Actually I wanted to ask her pers-…”

“Grandmother Anh?” you popped up behind Jaehyun and interjected. “I would happily join the dinner along with my husband! Thank you so much for the invitation!”

“Oh dear, I’m so glad! Then I’ll be going to prepare something nice for you two then, alright? See you later!”

When she was gone, you didn’t resume the topic from earlier, but instead said, “She probably heard it. She probably heard everything and was anxious about what was going on in here. Perhaps, she even thought we were physically fighting, so I had to show myself to let her see that everything is okay.”

“You could have just politely declined,” Jaehyun interposed.

“That’s not the point,” you explained calmly, walking around in the living room and pulling the curtains together. “The whole point of us being here is that we will pretend to be a happy couple, not drawing any suspicion on us. Doing grocery shopping every few days together just doesn’t do it. Didn’t you yourself say that words spread fast here?”

He didn’t want to concede it, but Jaehyun’s following words were his own gesture of acknowledging your believability. “So, what do you suggest we should do?”

Perhaps, he also realized at that moment, that he was missing something that you had been contributing from the very beginning: the ability to not only think rationally, but also compassionately. 

And that sometimes, your reckless acts originated from this character trait of yours, being a person who relied mostly on emotions and urges. He opened his mouth to say something, but quickly closed it again.

“We’re going to show everyone how happy we are as a couple. That it was a usual lovers’ quarrel, that we don’t physically fight, and that you don’t keep me locked up or whatever. And since you’ll be there too, it’s safe. Satisfied?”

You weren’t fond of all that, of the thought of going out, meeting people and pretending you were living the happy life of a married couple. But you had no choice.

You didn’t admit this openly, but this was your only way to survive this hellhole and eventually return to your old life one day.

____

You were more anxious than excited to finally step out of the house again. When you stood in front of the restaurant later that evening, you barely brought yourself to crack a smile. How were you supposed to pretend to be happy when all you wanted was to cry?

“Stop.” Jaehyun held you back when you already wanted to enter through the front door. “Didn’t you forget something?”

You cursed inwardly, having hoped that he had forgotten about it. Why had you even mentioned such a thing as holding hands to prove the nature of your relationship? You would rather not, but you also saw that it was necessary to come off as a true couple and not two strangers who had just met. Even though the latter was true.

So you placed your hand in Jaehyun’s for the first time. It felt surprisingly warm and tender, and so different from the attitude he always showed you. How could someone so grouchy and cold have such tender and warm hands?

Jaehyun’s fingers enclosed around yours, and the unexpected feeling he caused you to experience currently didn’t have anything to do with the fear of getting touched by him. By far not. Not even something close to it.

You were so flustered that you barely noticed how he led you into the restaurant, right towards a large table on which a handful of people were already seated, and all their heads turned to you.

“Oh my, it’s the Jungs!”

You directly spotted grandmother Anh who approached you from behind the counter, taking your hands into hers and out of Jaehyun’s grip.

“Welcome! Dear, let me introduce you to the other villagers,” she addressed you. “Mr. Jones already told me that you two met, but these are…”

She proceeded to list four names that you forgot right after again, and you then took one of the two left free seats at the table along with Jaehyun while the old woman was bringing in one dish after another.

“Please help yourselves!” grandmother Anh then announced after she had sat down well. “Dig in!”

The entire table was filled with different dishes from the region, but also asian food. You felt your mouth watering after having lived off your humble cooking skills ever since your arrival.

“You see, this is a special restaurant,” grandmother Anh explained to you. “I’m not specialized on Asian or Western food. Basically, I can cook anything by order.”

“That’s true,” a middle aged woman next to you answered, Mr. Jones’ wife. “Mrs. Anh started off with an Asian restaurant, but since she’s running the only food place here, the requests started to pile up.”

You swallowed the last bite of delicious fried rice - your go to comfort food - before you responded, “No matter Asian or Western, your food is very delicious, grandmother Anh.”

“I’m so happy you like it, dear!” She smiled from ear to ear. “Hurry, eat up before all the others do!”

You nodded, and for the first time since you had gotten here, you didn’t only feel hunger, but also appetite as you reached for fried chicken, more fried rice, baked potatoes and steamed vegetables all at once. 

When you were training - which was usually all the time - you hadn’t had the pleasure to eat such delightful food as you had to follow a very strict diet to remain your figure. Just a few grams more would have gotten you kicked out of every academy. Of course you stole a secret bite of fast food and sweet treats here and there, but tonight was the first time you could actually eat without compunction.

“... And you left everything behind for your husband, even your job?” Mrs. Jones casually dropped when the dinner slowed down and everyone was finishing off. “That’s so courageous!”

Before you had come here, you had studied both of the roles that had been assigned to you very thoroughly. Jaehyun was the cop who had found a new job here, and you, his wife, had followed from Korea to settle with him in rural Connecticut. That was the part of the script that bothered you the most as this was something you would never ever consider doing in the first place. Giving up your dreams for a man - they wished!

“The things women do for the love of their life, hm?” you only brought yourself to say reluctantly, dripping with hidden sarcasm.

“My husband also made us both move from Vietnam to here,” grandmother Anh clinked herself into your conversation. “He was always dreaming so big, dreaming about living the American dream. I wasn’t fond of the idea, but I was even less fond of living a life without him. So I followed him.”

“Where is your husband now?” it blurted out of you, and you regretted it right at that moment already when her face fell. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

“It’s alright, dear,” she brushed it off in understanding about your unawareness. “It’s been five years without him, and I still miss him dearly. With my experience, I can put myself in your shoes very well. You feel lonely and depressed very often, hm? A new country, new people, an entirely new environment, and a husband who’s not home for the majority of the day. It’s hard to adjust.”

Those feelings had nothing to do with Jaehyun, but with yourself only, so you confirmed them with a nod. 

“How about you join our female poker round every wednesday?” Mrs. Jones then proposed. “It’s grandmother Anh, the girl sitting over there named Rosie, and me.”

When the girl heard her name, she briefly raised her head and smiled at you.

“Poker?” you asked carefully. “I’ve never played poker before.”

“You’ll learn it in no time!” Rosie encouraged you. “I’m pretty sure we aren’t playing it accurately either, but we’re having lots of fun and drinking lots of wine. You’ll love it!”

Poker with two elderly women and a girl around your age that you had barely interacted with before didn’t sound like your usual pastime activity back there in Korea. But at least there would be alcoholic drinks, and it would help you avoid this dark hole for a little while, you assumed.

“I’m afraid my wife might not be able to join,” Jaehyun then cut you off at the moment you wanted to excitedly accept their invitation. The three women looked at him in the same confused manner as you. “She’s really busy with work around the house and chores.”

“I’m sure I’ll be done by wednesday, that’s how fast but thorough I always work,” you affirmed to the women, avoiding Jaehyun. “So I’ll join you for sure.”

Jaehyun opened his mouth again, but it perhaps dawned on him that when he objected now, he’d look more like a husband mistreating his wife. The fact that he was known as a police officer didn’t affect the situation positively. 

“Okay,” he then gave in. “I’ll let you ladies have fun.”

“Oh it’s going to be so fun!” Rosie exclaimed and clapped her hands together. 

You were really looking forward to something now as well, for the first time since you had gotten here.

____

“Go, yell at me,” you provoked Jaehyun when you walked through the front door of your house after the dinner.

But he didn’t. Instead, he hung up his jacket, totally muted, put his phone on the kitchen counter and walked straight into the bathroom, locking the door behind him. Whatever, if he didn’t want to talk about it, then you didn’t need to talk about it either.

With dragging steps, you then moved over to the kitchen yourself to get something to drink before your eyes fell onto Jaehyun’s phone.

Your front teeth sank into your bottom lip as you stretched out your hand in the direction of the device. You knew it was wrong, you knew what consequences it would all bring, yet you couldn’t hold back. The temptation was too strong.

Your fingers glided swiftly over Jaehyun’s display as you typed the name of your stalker into the search bar. And the first article that popped up was the one reporting about his release. 

Dated today. You knew it. You just knew it.

You cursed under your breath as you read through the comments that were almost all defaming him and the acquittal following everything he had done to you. When it had gotten public that a popular ballerina had been stalked, the media was quick to cover the story. Before, no one had cared about it. 

The majority of people having your back in the comment section were only a drop in the bucket. But it still was soothing somehow.

When you went back to the search results, you found an article about you retiring from the Korea National Ballet. It wasn’t a big one, but had still gotten covered by a local newspaper after your absence from the performances had been noticed, and they were quick to link your decision with your stalker not getting a sentence because the state of evidence was too insufficient. 

Your fingers trembled, because now, as soon as he picked up these news, he would start searching for you and carry out his threat that he had sent to your home through a letter a week before you had started your new life here,

I will come for you.

“You know for sure that this isn’t allowed,” Jaehyun scolded strictly next to you, and you flinched, nearly letting the phone drop before he snatched it out of your hands. “Didn’t I already tell you that with today’s technology, every time you go online, you leave traces? You want that? Having him here?”

“I didn’t log into any social media or anything,” you defended yourself. “I just… looked him up, and hundreds of other people pulled up that website also, so.”

“Even that is not-”

“He’s free,” you interrupted him, your breathing only coming in hitches as you realized what it meant for you. “As of today, he’s free again, and he’ll come for me. Like he wrote in that letter.”

You shut your eyes, ready to get yelled at, but Jaehyun didn’t say a word again. With the phone in his hand, he went into the bedroom - your room - and you followed him. You didn’t know what this meant. Had you gone too far tonight? 

“What are you doing?”

He jerked something out of the closet, and at second glance, you recognized the thing in his hands as your suitcase which he then threw at your feet.

“Go pack. You’re going home.”

You blinked in confusion. “What?”

“If you don’t give a damn about your life, you don’t deserve to stay here. So you should go home.”

He was so cold and indifferent about it, it made you shudder. And that stare of his. You hadn’t seen it before. This was serious.

When you had first come here, you would have rejoiced and would have willingly accepted a flight ticket back. But with this knowledge, the thought about setting a foot on Korea’s grounds with your stalker on the loose raised your hackles. Then, this entire nightmare would start all over.

Hesitantly, you brought yourself to admit that this was where you were the safest now. On the other side of the world, by the side of a detective. 

“Please…” you started.

“What am I supposed to say?” Jaehyun asked, overly annoyed, not breaking eye contact. “You defied my orders. Again. You think I didn’t know about this? I knew before you did, before the media did. It’s because of your reaction that I wasn’t supposed to say a word. Now look at what it has done to you! Will you ever get a good night’s sleep again?”

“I’m sorry!” You had never said that to him before, so this was a huge step for you. But you meant it. “I couldn’t resist. I had to know.”

“Of course you had to. You always have to meddle. Did something positive ever result from your meddlings? Perhaps, your meddlings have even brought this upon you!”

You stared at each other and Jaehyun’s face fell when it dawned on him what he had just said. Once again.

“You’re not better than any of them,” you hissed. “Yet, I’m not going anywhere.”

You picked up your suitcase and threw it back into the closet. When you turned around, Jaehyun had left your room already, so you quickly closed the door in case he would return and hid in the safety of your familiar four walls until the next morning. 

____

When wednesday finally came around, you were still feeling some sort of anticipation that Jaehyun’s hurtful words hadn’t been able to entirely tear down. You had only interacted with him when it was truly necessary since the day he wanted to kick you out, otherwise avoiding him at all costs. At least, he hadn’t prohibited you from going today.

“Remember to only share the most necessary things about us,” Jaehyun repeated again as you walked along the streets to grandmother Anh’s restaurant. “And not more. Don’t invent anything, just dodge the topic. If someone wants to take a picture, prohibit it. But luckily, people here aren’t so obsessed with social media.”

“It’s so easy for an emotional klutz like you to say such things,” you grumbled. “But it’s something entirely different when people put pressure on you, especially when you’re in such a small group.”

“Whatever,” he shrugged it off. “Just dodge everything you can dodge.”

You rolled your eyes. You hadn’t wanted him to come with you, but one of his conditions was to still accompany you everywhere once you stepped outside of the house, so you had no choice but to walk with him all the way there. 

“I’ll pick you up at ten, okay?” Jaehyun confirmed, and you nodded. “If something happens-”

“What should happen? We’re in the middle of nowhere and I’m just playing poker with the three less suspicious people on earth. Give it a rest already.”

“If something happens,” he continued unbothered, “or you start to feel uneasy… even if you only want me to pick you up no matter the reason, even if you’re only a few minutes away…” He reached his hand into his pocket. “Take this, just in case.”

He held up a black flip phone in front of you. One which you had only seen in action way back then in primary school, and which you deemed antique by now, because you were only able to send text messages and make calls with it. That kind of phone.

You took it into your hand and opened it up. The black and white display only showed one number when you pulled up the contacts list. You proceeded from the assumption that it was Jaehyun’s.

“It’s curbed, so you can only call me. Shortcut is one. The card has fifteen bucks on it, but I doubt you’ll spend it all unless we talk to each other for six hours straight. So don’t even think about calling someone you know from back home.”

Perhaps, a tiny part of him did care in the end. At least more than any policeman back there in Korea throughout the span of a year.

“Okay.” He cleared his throat. “See you later then. At ten.”

What you had wanted was an apology. But this was nearly just as good and his very own way of saying sorry, you saw that now.

Jaehyun turned his back to you and slowly walked back while you stored the phone away in your purse and entered the restaurant through the front door.

Not much later, you found yourself laughing among the other three women, having forgotten about your miserable situation for the evening as you hadn’t had so much fun in a long time already. 

Poker had faded into the background and you were getting to know about the other women more than playing cards. And while you were talking, you emptied one bottle of wine after another.

“So tell me,” Rosie urged, “how did you and Jay meet? It’s so rare having such a young couple deciding to live with us so secludedly!”

“We’ve met when we were both still in university,” you revealed, having studied this part of your new identities very carefully so that your stories would match. Yet, you couldn’t help but to spice it up a bit. “Through mutual friends. We couldn’t actually stand each other at first. I hated his guts, and he hated mine. But we slowly warmed up, and the rest is history.” 

“At first, I couldn’t quite read him as well,” Rosie admitted. “So I found his character very off-putting. But Jay is actually really warm-hearted and caring.”

No way she was talking about Jaehyun. You suppressed a laugh.

“That’s true!” Mrs. Jones nodded. “When he came into the hardware store earlier today, I was there too, talking to Mr. Alden. And he was searching every shelf high and low for an MP3 player. You know, one of these old things that you can only listen to music with which no one uses anymore. Mr. Alden didn’t have one of these of course, so he ordered it for him. He looked very stressed about it, but in a desperate and not angry way. More like a gift he needed promptly.”

An MP3 player? What would he need it for? In your world, your husband wasn’t capable of showing or even bearing feelings at all. Why was it then, that these people had a whole other picture of him?

“One time, at my father’s pharmacy,” Rosie added, “he asked what my father could recommend if someone suffered from a stomach ache. Apparently, his wife, so you, was in pain one night, and he wanted to be prepared for the next time this could occur. So, I would say you truly have a dedicated husband.”

You frowned. You had indeed suffered from a stomach ache one night, searching through the shelves and ending up making tea instead as you hadn’t found any medicine. That you had found it the next day, you had blamed it on your absent-mindedness.

“Mr. Jung surely has a warm heart despite his stoic demeanor. Otherwise he also wouldn’t have helped me when I had fallen on my back. That happened only last week. He carried me all the way to the doctor’s,” grandmother Anh continued.

There had truly been a day when Jaehyun had only come home much later than usual, and he was commonly very strict in keeping his routines. You hadn’t asked him about it though and had shrugged it off again. That was how indifferent you always were at home. Perhaps, you then realized, you should start doing exactly that: communicate. 

You couldn’t continue living with a person you openly despised and didn’t care about. Jaehyun had said a few awful things to you, but the phone in your purse and what people were telling about him were proof enough to you that he was, indeed, different from the cops you had encountered until now.

Most likely, he wasn’t so awful and you had only failed to see. Jaehyun had given you a few second chances. Now, it was your turn to give him one.

“Why the long face?” Rosie pulled you out of your thoughts. “Let’s celebrate the start of your new life here! Grandmother Anh, I’m going to open another bottle, alright? The night is still young, cheers!”

You heard it pop for the second time.

____

You woke up the next morning with a headache. You didn’t know how you had gotten home or when, but the last time you had gotten so drunk, it was in the academy in the Netherlands. These village people’s alcohol tolerance was really on a whole other level!

A glimpse at your phone told you that it was midday already, and you suddenly were sitting up straight in your bed. But since you had no business anywhere anyway, you fell back against the mattress.

You then slowly drifted off to sleep again when the doorbell interrupted your nap. That was the downside of living in such a small village. People just came over whenever they wanted.

“Have you just woken up?” Rosie asked you.

A bit embarrassed, you scratched your head. “Maybe…”

“It’s been a tough way home, hm?” she laughed. “Jay also didn’t quite know what to do with you.”

“To do… with me?” you repeated with widened eyes.

“Oh my!” Rosie covered her opened mouth with her hand and giggled. “You can’t remember a thing?”

You shook your head. “Nothing.”

“You were so drunk after our fourth bottle of wine, you slept in right there and then. Jay had to carry you in a piggy back out of the restaurant and all the way home up here, and you didn’t even bat an eye.” She chuckled again. “And then, you only cried, ‘I wanna go home, I wanna go home!’ while he constantly replied, ‘You’re gonna be home soon’. And you said again, ‘But not this home!’”

“Holy!” you gasped. “I really can’t remember!”

Everyone knew about the drunken truth, and Jaehyun had also certainly known that you didn’t mean this home when you had said you wanted to return. If the alcohol had gone to your head much more, you would have probably revealed your true identity by accident! You suddenly felt so defeated. You had put yourself in danger. Again.

“Make sure to reward him properly for all the convenience with a nice meal or otherwise, okay?” Rosie winked and handed a paper bag over to you. “And start out by giving him these painkillers for his back pain. My father doesn’t recommend using it on a daily basis. Perhaps, change your mattress to a less soft one as they probably stem from that.”

“But our mattress is not soft,” you commented naively and accepted the painkillers when it suddenly crossed your mind that he didn’t even sleep on the bed. “It’s probably only because he naps on the couch so often,” you briefly corrected yourself. “I’ll have an eye on it.”

After Rosie said goodbye to you, you closed the entry door behind you and directly went into the bedroom to prepare something before Jaehyun came home.

When he eventually walked through the front door a bit later that day, he didn’t say a thing about the night before, but calmly took off his jacket and went to sit on the couch without greeting you. 

Communicate. Your start. “Can you come to the bedroom real quick, please?”

Without a complaint, he arose again and followed you. When you opened the door, you presented a room to him with your clothes and other stuff all gone, the bedding freshly exchanged.

“This is your room from now on.”

Jaehyun blinked in irritation, and it was not the first time that you witnessed him turning so startled. You continued to take him aback. “I don’t understand…”

“I’m sorry,” you apologized to him quietly and bowed. “For having caused such havoc last night, being a burden to you again. When Rosie told me what happened because I can’t remember a thing, I realized that I put us both in danger again, now with my habit of drunkenly telling the truth. It wasn’t my indication to do so, and I will look after my alcohol consumption much better from now on. As I will do with everything else, of course. I will be obedient and follow the rules.”

He slowly turned around to you, his expression not quite distinctive enough for you to read. “Okay.”

“And because of your back pain, Rosie dropped by earlier with the painkillers. But I know it’s all because of me too. So, here, have the bedroom. It’ll be much better if you sleep on the bed as the mattress is not as soft. I’ll take the couch, I’ll be fine.”

You both stood there, quiet for a while. Until Jaehyun broke the silence himself. “There is a mattress.” 

“What?”

“Here.” He crouched down, put his hands in the compartment under the bed and pulled out a small mattress that had been kept there apparently. “It’s too small for me, but for you, it should be fine. Let me carry it to the living room for you, okay?”

You smiled and nodded. “Thank you. And thank you for the stomach medicine as well.”

He opened his mouth to return something, but seemed to get too flustered and closed his lips again. It was familiar to you.

“I’m sorry too.” You turned keen-eared. What had he just said? Jaehyun’s ear tips turned red as he looked to the side. “I- I didn’t mean it. You’re not… you know.”

He didn’t elaborate what he referred to. But he didn’t need to. You knew what he had exactly apologized for, and accepted it. All the things, little and big. About you being a princess, about you always meddling. And about you having brought this upon yourself.

Your husband wasn’t a man of many words, but he had silently accepted your apology too by starting to sleep in the bedroom that night and leaving the new mattress to you. 

You hadn’t been much of a great wife either, and you silently promised to him to be a better one from now on.

____

You were alone the next night, Jaehyun working overtime as one of his colleagues had spontaneously wanted to change shifts, so he had to take up on two in a row.

That was why, even by 1am, you still weren’t able to sleep. In your pajamas already though, you wandered up and down the living room, your thoughts swimming. You had kept the lights turned off as you went back to your mattress every now and then when you felt ready to finally fall asleep, only to fail once again.

You had gotten so used to having Jaehyun sleep in the room next to you that now that he was gone, you couldn’t fall asleep at all as you felt so defenseless. You were not paranoid about your stalker having gotten here, but with Jaehyun around, you had been able to fall asleep with more ease.

All by yourself though, you felt at your own fear’s mercy.

THUD

You froze on the spot. What in the hell was that?

You were currently facing the window, but the noise came from the other side of the closed door where the bedroom was located. Believing that your hearing might have fooled you, you held in your breath and listened closely.

Thud.

Again. This time, not that loudly, but it was clearly the same noise as before. You almost didn’t dare to make a move. It was in the middle of spring, the weather was warm and the moon was shining brightly. This was not the background noise of a thunderstorm.

Thud.

No, you hadn’t been fooled by your own hearing. There was definitely something going on in the bedroom that should not be going on, and Jaehyun was not here tonight! Restraining your breathing volume, you tiptoed to the kitchen area, hoping the parquet under your feet wouldn’t audibly give in.

THUD.

Louder. Your heart was racing, but you told yourself over and over again that you couldn’t afford losing your nerves now. Perhaps, it was an animal trying to get in, perhaps the wind pressing a branch against the glass, but perhaps also someone trying to break in. 

It couldn’t be him.

… right?

He was still in Seoul, you had obediently followed Jaehyun’s rules, you had left no traces. There was no possibility that he could be here.

… right?

The faults you had made hadn’t been that grave. You were now obediently following the rules.

… right?

As your gaze fell upon the kitchen counter, you reached for the phone Jaehyun had given to you and dialed the shortcut. The phone was shaking in your trembling fingers as the display lightened up and you saw it trying to connect to Jaehyun. 

But he didn’t pick up. You tried again and again. But he didn’t pick up even after the fifth attempt. You nearly wanted to cry. What was a police officer husband good for when he wouldn’t even come to rescue you? 

Whatever, you didn’t need him anyway. You were a strong, independent woman, you would take matters in your own hand. Literally. So you grabbed the pan that was lying on the stove and headed for the bedroom door. 

At this moment, you didn’t know what was louder. Your own heartbeat, your own breathing or the thudding that came from the bedroom. Perhaps, all at once, and the only thing that kept you going right now was the thought that you just didn’t want to die here, all alone, on the other side of the world, without having seen your friends and family again. 

BAM.

“Hey!”

You flinched the second you stretched out your hand to press down the door handle as the lights suddenly turned on, and a sharp scream escaped your lips as you were sure your life was flashing before your eyes. The pan fell onto your feet, missing your toes by a hairbreadth, as a pair of strong arms wrapped around you from behind.

Then, you realized that you were crying as you twisted and turned, trying to escape. “Let me go! Let me go!”

“It’s me!” a familiar voice then came through to you. “It’s Jaehyun! It’s me!”

His voice, his scent. This all suddenly embraced you as it dawned on you that indeed, it was him. You had just not known what it was like to be held by him which had startled you so much as you had never had any physical contact before.

In his arms, your chest was still heaving up and down heavily, but he held you closely and tightly, with no intention to let you go now as tears continued to stream down your face.

“It’s okay,” you then heard Jaehyun whisper, his voice close to your ear. “I’m here now.”

He only let you go after you had stopped trembling and crying out loudly, and only reluctantly with a deep sigh from your part. You didn’t know where that had exactly come from though.

As you then turned around to him, you clenched your fists and hammered against his chest. “You idiot! Where have you been?!” you yelled at him. “I’ve called you five times, but you didn’t pick up! What do you have a cell phone for!”

Jaehyun didn’t hinder you from letting out your anger. Only when your strength was slowly subsiding as exhaustion settled, he enclosed your fingers and explained to you calmly, “I’m sorry. I didn’t hear it ring as I was in the car with my colleagues, and when I got out, I was already here and saw that you have called five times.”

“I- I… I heard,” you stuttered, but you didn’t quite know how to explain your situation. What if he would think you had only imagined it and didn’t take you seriously? 

But Jaehyun did exactly that without you having to explain yourself. “My colleagues are currently searching the property high and low. I came here the moment I left the car.”

“I heard a thudding noise coming from the bedroom. As though… I don’t know. Someone was trying to get in. Through the window… I don’t know, there was definitely something!”

“Okay, let me check.”

You were hiding behind Jaehyun as he slowly pushed the door open and got in position. Then, he switched the lights on and you saw, as you peeked from behind him, exactly nothing. With slow steps, Jaehyun crossed the room and positioned himself in front of the closet. As he drew the door open, as expected again, you only found clothes inside of it.

“All clear inside here,” he then confirmed and approached the window to open it, calling outside, “What’s up out there?”

“All clear out here!” you heard someone yell in the distance.

“All clear in here as well!”

“You want us to stay put?” 

Hesitantly, Jaehyun turned around to you, and then back to the window. “It’s okay, for tonight, I got this. Thank you.”

“Alright.”

Your teeth sank into your bottom lip as you stood by the door and felt embarrassment crawling up your cheeks. “I’m sorry. I was so sure…”

“Don’t ever apologize for such things,” Jaehyun cut you off, and you faced him with insecure eyes. “You were scared, and your feelings are valid. Nothing else matters.”

The majority of people would have brushed it off. But Jaehyun had taken you seriously the moment he saw you all alone, so scared.

Only later that night, when you were ready for bed again, it sank into you that this was probably what the other women had talked about when the topic revolved around Jaehyun last week. Finally, even for only a short moment, he had shown you this part of him as well.

“Where is my mattress?” you then asked when you came out of the bathroom.

“In the bedroom,” Jaehyun deadpanned. “Come.”

You raised a brow, but willingly followed him to the bedroom where you found your mattress lying next to the bed. 

“Tonight, you can stay here. Just…” You heard him gulp. “... just… in case you feel unsafe and scared again.”

He made it sound like you had requested for it, which you surely hadn’t, and you both knew. It was Jaehyun’s manner of offering you some kind of security and solace, just because he wanted to, not because you had asked for it.

“Thank you.”

“And next time when I have the day off, I’m going to show you how to shoot with a gun.”

“... what?”

For the first time since you had come here, you didn’t cry yourself to sleep. You didn’t know whether it was because of the shock that was still lingering or because of someone else sleeping right next to you, even though not on the same bed.

“Jaehyun?”

“... Hm?”

You had your back turned to the side of the bed and were facing the wall from your small mattress, eyes wide open while listening to Jaehyun fiddling with the blanket just two feet away from you.

If you had faced him at this moment, you didn’t know if you would still have said what you were about to say.

“I take it back. You’re better than all of them combined.”

He knew what you meant, and despite his missing audible answer, you were sure he had gratefully acknowledged it.

When Jaehyun’s breathing rhythm became quieter and more regular, you could finally relax as well, a foreign nervousness falling off your shoulders and letting you drift off to sleep shortly after.

You felt so safe like never in your life before.

____

“What exactly happened with that man, if I may ask?” 

You were standing in the backyard, Jaehyun getting the gun prepared while you watched him.

“I thought you had all the background info about me before I got here already?” 

“Not the details. I only know about a guy who’s stalked a popular ballerina in Seoul. She dragged him to court, but the judge decided that the evidence was too insufficient and that he’d most likely get free. Since the ballerina claimed he had threatened her again, she was put in this program voluntarily.”

“I didn’t claim that he threatened me,” you disagreed. “He sent a letter. With a death threat. To my home. But the judge said it cannot be proven that it’s from him.”

“I only told you what I heard.”

Yet, he had still taken your fears from the night before seriously. You wondered whether, if Jaehyun had been responsible for your case back there in Seoul, you would still be here now.

“It started with a simple bouquet of roses after every performance shortly after I joined the Korea National Ballet a year ago,” you started. “I just returned from the Netherlands and it was my first engagement as a professional ballerina. At first, I found it flattering to already have such a dedicated fan. He’s a man in his early thirties, neat, groomed and very polite. Until he made his intentions clear and I rejected his advances. That’s when he stopped being polite.”

“That’s where it usually starts,” Jaehyun noted.

You nodded. “Admiration turned into obsession with bouquets that got even bigger and more pompous. With letters that claimed his unconditional love for me. With presents that I’m too embarrassed to talk about. Then, obsession turned into harassment. With phone calls from different numbers over one hundred times a day. With a date’s car tires all slashed. With fake online profiles of mine where manipulated nudes popped up. Back then, I still thought I could handle this all by myself. I’m a grown up woman. I’m responsible for myself.”

“When did it change?” Jaehyun questioned. “When did you report everything to the police?”

“When I started getting texts like ‘Better pull the curtains together when you sleep’ right after I went to bed and ‘Home sweet home’ with a picture of me entering my apartment building. I never disclosed my home address to anyone.”

Jaehyun was lost for words.

“And what did the police do? Nothing. Because they had too little conception of such things, they told me. The guy never signed his gifts, never showed up physically again as well. Presents, calls and letters aren’t a crime. And they didn’t take the phone calls as well as texts seriously enough to track the source as they claimed they wouldn't be able to do it.”

“I’m sorry.” Jaehyun released the gun’s safety catch, and you heard it in his voice that, in comparison to the detective from the plane, he was sincere about it. “There are detectives who care and detectives who don’t care. After all, we’re all normal people. But they were clearly people who didn't care enough.”

“I’m not alone with this situation. There was a case where the stalker waited under the girl’s bed. Another one waited in her roommate’s closet. Another one waited for her right on the streets. And they all ended up dead. I don’t want to join them. I’m only lucky to be here, because my father had the money to. These other girls weren't so lucky. But I want to be lucky and strong for all the girls who couldn’t be and can’t be in the future.”

“What do you mean?”

“I will come back home,” you responded determinedly. “I will come back home and get him imprisoned. This time, forever.”

“I haven’t encountered a woman like you until now,” Jaehyun concluded after some beats of silence passed by in which his gaze didn’t divert from yours.

You furrowed. “Like me?”

He nodded and held up the gun. “So fearless.”

You took it as a compliment and smiled. You hadn’t heard such kind words out of his mouth until now. But then again, this was the first proper conversation you two shared since you lived together.

“Here.” Jaehyun showed you how to properly hold the weapon. “Make sure this finger is here and this one here. Right now, it’s not locked anymore. If you pull the trigger…”

“... it will shoot.”

“Yes. Here, let me lock it again and then try releasing the safety catch yourself.”

You took the gun from his hand after he was done and placed it in your own palms. Positioning your fingers where Jaehyun had shown you, you weren’t able to get it right on the first attempt.

“Your index finger must be here.” Jaehyun touched it and moved it around. “And your thumb… right. Here. But a bit lower for a better grip.” He gently motioned this finger down as well. 

Where you had loathed his touches before, you still minded them. But oddly, not in the same, negative way. No, better say in a way that made you wish he would have his fingers placed on yours for a little bit longer and one that made you crave for more than these little touches.

“You wanna know how to aim at your target?”

Excitedly, you nodded and heard Jaehyun chuckle. For the first time, very genuinely. It was like last night had broken the ice between you two that should have melted weeks ago already.

“Hello? Someone home? It’s me, Rosie!”

“Quick.” Jaehyun took the gun from your hands and hid it behind his back.

“We’re outside!” you called out and saw Rosie turning around the corner a moment later. 

“Hey you two! What a beautiful sunday, right? I hope next week, the weather will be just as beautiful, because then… drum roll please… we’re going to hold our annual spring festival!” She lifted up her hand and presented a few colorful flyers to you. “Please come, okay? There will be boots, an animal competition and a stage for karaoke!”

Immediately, you were hooked. “Of course!” But then, it crossed your mind that you were only allowed to go outside with Jaehyun’s confirmation and instantly fell back into silence, unsure whether to face him.

“You two have fun together. I have volunteered to patrol that day, so I’ll be kind of there anyway.” 

Jaehyun had indeed given you indirect permission!

“Oh, it’s going to be so cool, trust me!” Rosie clapped her hands. “Okay, I’m going to inform the next house! I’m telling you, the people coming into the village center less than you are the Schmidts! See you next week at the latest, alright? And you, we’ll be seeing each other tomorrow at poker, okay?”

You hadn’t known that you were invited again, that you had gotten welcomed with open arms and accepted into this community. But it made you very happy, and you nodded.

“Of course. See you tomorrow.”

Later that day, Jaehyun placed a small object on the table that you hadn’t seen in quite a while. Since primary school, to be exact.

“This is for you.”

“What’s this?” you asked, even though the answer was quite clear. 

You were sleeping in the living room again, but somehow, since the night you had spent by Jaehyun’s side, you felt a bit more lonely than before. You weren’t crying yourself to sleep at all anymore, yet the feeling of loneliness still lingered. 

And it was not the kind of loneliness that made you long to hear a family member’s voice, it was more than that. This, you were sure of.

“An MP3 player,” Jaehyun announced and crinkled up his nose. “I figured, if you were to spend your time here with no connection to the outside world aside from the TV, you might as well spend it with your passion.” He placed a pair of earphones next to the device. “You can use it to listen to music only or to dance. Just as you please.”

You looked at Jaehyun, and saw it clearly now. With the person who had made you feel so unwelcome the day you had landed in this unfamiliar country, he had nothing in common anymore. 

This was not only a side of him, this was him. 

The man Mrs. Jones had talked about who had searched the shelves high and low for exactly this device. The man Rosie saw buying stomach medicine and the one who had helped grandmother Anh when she had fallen. 

This man had finally shown himself to you too in all his aspects.

You didn’t know what had made Jaehyun accept you for who you were to him, but somewhere along the way, he had settled with this arrangement.

And you were getting adjusted to your new life as well, you realized as your features softened. 

“Thank you.”

____

When the day of the festival finally came around, you stood with Rosie in front of grandmother Anh’s booth and tasted her dumplings together.

“My dear girls, you need to try these too! I experimented with another filling, so please give me feedback.”

The old woman shifted another plate in your direction, but you and Rosie waved aside in unison.

“Granny, we’re so stuffed already!” Rosie said. “And you don’t even want us to pay! Leave these for your actual paying guests.”

“Alright, alright! But I’ll make them for our next poker night! And then, you’ll tell me how they taste!”

“Okay!” you agreed. “We’re going to Mrs. Jones’ booth now, grandmother Anh. See you later!”

Linked with Rosie’s arm, you made your way through different booths, passing by people from neighboring villages as well as the stage, until you reached Mrs. Jones at the other side of the festival ground.

“Hello my favorite girls!” she greeted you cheerily. “Look what I have! A cotton candy machine! You can each have one for free!”

“Are you sure you can operate this?” Rosie skeptically raised a brow. “When people serve these, they look so professional, but you haven’t ever used one before, or am I wrong?”

“That’s not true!” the woman whined playfully. “Don’t be so rude, Rosalind Richards, or I’ll have a talk with your father!”

“Guess I’m not one of her favorite girls anymore!” Rosie whispered to you, and you chuckled while Mrs. Jones prepared the cotton candy for each of you.

In the end, the outcome wasn’t even that bad, she only needed to practice a bit more. With the cotton candies in each of your hands, you and Rosie walked over to watch the animal competition. 

People had brought their dogs and walked with them up the stage where they demonstrated different tricks. You and your friend were standing there for the entire time, eating your cotton candy and watching the dogs show off what they had practiced for. When the competition was over, you rode a few rounds on the small ferris wheel and visited the other booths, only finishing your tour when the sun was already setting.

Your last stop was a shooting gallery where you met Jaehyun overlooking the situation. He had been here since the morning, so you assumed he was off duty now as he wasn’t in his uniform anymore, standing at the sidelines, joking with another colleague. 

You had never seen him effortlessly interacting with other people in daily situations before, and for the first time, you perceived him as the normal man that he was outside of your fake marriage. Casually standing there, talking, laughing. A normal man whose dark hair was blowing in the wind, his sleeves rolled up, his arms folded in front of his chest.

A perfectly normal man who was also very attractive. 

As his head slowly moved to the side, your gazes met, and you gulped, somehow embarrassed that you had gotten caught, although it was only natural to look at your partner. 

Jaehyun was a man you could have easily felt attracted to if you had met under normal circumstances, not as your fake husband and your taciturn protector.

You had only failed to see clearly until this day.

“Oh look, it’s your husband Jay!” Rosie then finally noticed as well. “Let’s go over to them!”

A smile spread across Jaehyun’s face and he lifted his hand to wave at you. When you approached his group though, he got called over to the booth and took a rifle in his hand. Apparently, he had lined up to shoot.

“Oh let’s watch him!” Rosie urged.

“Jay is our best shooter,” one of his colleagues said proudly. “Look closely.”

He was leaning over the booth’s counter, his rolled up sleeves revealing his muscular arms and veiny hands. His entire body was tensed up, every single nerve concentrated on bringing down the targets. The air was almost static due to the tension as even other people stopped to watch.

Bang! Bang! Bang!

Before you could even process what had happened, Jaehyun had shot down all three targets at the first go, and the spectators were rejoicing. 

“Wow!” Rosie exclaimed. “What was that? I couldn’t even follow the happenings!”

Indeed! You watched Jaehyun giving back the rifle and having presented the prizes in the back of the booth which offered everything, from giant plushies, different toys to knick-knacks. Knowing Jaehyun, he would probably take a pass on that, so you were quite surprised when he chose something from the knick-knacks.

You couldn’t see what it exactly was, but as he shifted around to you, Jaehyun approached you with a keychain dangling between his fingers. It was a yellow elephant that wore a red tie. It looked hella ridiculous and childish - but not to you. 

Stretching out his hand, Jaehyun held it out to you, and you were stunned, not exactly knowing where to turn your attention to: the gift or Jaehyun who looked at you with a gaze you had never seen on him before.

As you didn’t move, you felt Rosie’s elbow poking into your back, pulling you back to reality. No, you shouldn’t behave like a dumbfounded twelve-year-old, this was officially your husband after all!

So you raised your hand and took the keychain between your fingers. It was a plush knick-knack that probably wasn’t valuable at all. But Jaehyun had chosen this one among everything he had been offered to give it to you. And you would treasure it dearly.

You smiled. “Thank you.”

“It’s late. Let’s go home?”

You nodded and said goodbye to Rosie before you followed Jaehyun across the festival ground. You had trouble keeping up with his steps among all these people, so Jaehyun did what every other good husband would do: he reached for your hand and kept it in his until you had left the premises.

That was only for the show in front of all these people, you kept telling yourself the entire time. You had to prove to them that you were a happily married couple, and such couples did things like these.

The keychain, which you had attached to your purse, dangled with each step you took as you raised your voice, “Jaehyun…”

“Hm?”

“Why are you here?” you wanted to know. “You know my story, but what about yours? Is this your department?”

You spent every day alongside this man, yet knew nothing about the true him. At first, you hadn’t cared either. But the more time you spent by his side, the more it irked you that he was still such an enigma.

You thought he’d stonewall, but he gave you a clear answer, “I’m the NYPD, as a matter of fact.”

“Oh, I see. New York, hm.” You nodded. “And… why are you here?” 

The way his fingers cramped up around yours made you freeze despite having to keep up with his pace while walking. You had hit a sensitive nerve, you immediately became aware of that.

“I’m sor-”

“You really want to know?” he asked back. 

“Yeah.” You shrugged. 

“I did something a good detective should have never done.”

And with this sentence, he wasn’t about to tell you more. He didn’t need to express this, you were able to read the atmosphere. But that only kept your thoughts spinning. What was something so terrible that a detective could do that got him transferred to another area of responsibility?

You didn’t believe that Jaehyun was a bad person. 

He was cold at times, but an entirely cold person wouldn’t have let you sleep on the bed while they were enduring back problems. He was grumpy at times, but an entirely grumpy person wouldn’t have warmed up to the point of letting a smile slip every now and then. He pretended not to care at times, but a person who entirely didn’t care wouldn’t make sure that the people around them would be well and healthy. 

He was crude at times, but an entirely crude person wouldn’t have held your hand until you were home.

____

“What are you doing?” Jaehyun asked you when he came home from work that day and found you sitting at the edge of the bathtub with the bathroom’s door wide open.

“Dyeing my hair.”

“Pink? Red?” he asked.

“Magenta. It was quite an adventure until I had the base, but I think I’m there now,” you explained while you stirred the color in the small bowl in your palm. A huge amount had already been put on your head.

“Isn’t it too…” He stopped.

“Too flamboyant?” You intentionally used the word he had described you with the first time you had met. “Probably. But, just in case someone will ever make a connection between me and the ballerina from Seoul, they will dismiss the thought immediately since my English is almost flawless and my hair doesn’t match the color.”

Jaehyun seemed to ponder about it, but then confirmed your way of thinking. “I think you’re right.”

“Besides…” You smiled mildly. “Ever since I was little, I was never allowed to alter my appearance. A ballerina has to look perfect where perfect means we all have to look the same. Same hair, same makeup, same figure. It’s kind of nice to try something new after all this time.”

“Okay.” Jaehyun held up a plastic bag. “Grandmother Anh gave me these dumplings when I dropped by her restaurant today. I’ll prepare them for dinner, okay?”

“Alright!”

“Hurry up, they’ll be done in a few.”

“Got it.”

You quickly finished dyeing your hair and wrapped it all up with a shower cap before you went to the dinner table where Jaehyun had not only prepared the dumplings, but also different side dishes such as rice and vegetables.

You hadn’t known that he was such a good cook, but thinking back, Jaehyun had always prepared more extravagant dishes in comparison to you who just threw rice and vegetables together.  In fact, you had never quite learned how to cook.

This was the first time that you and Jaehyun ate dinner together and the first time that he had cooked for you, too.

“You look ridiculous,” he commented while he scooped rice on each of your plates. But was this a chuckle that had accompanied his voice?

“It’s not quite done yet. Wait until it’s washed out and dried. I’ll be the only pink-haired ballerina walking on this earth!”

You threw your hands in the air, almost tipping over a bowl, but you didn’t mind. Somehow, this was a very good feeling - to finally make your own decisions for your own body, your own appearance. It was only a minor change, but to you, it felt like you could conquer the world. 

“Enjoy the meal!” you announced and then dug in. 

By the first bite you could tell that Jaehyun was not only a good cook, but an exceptionally good cook. This, you also told him, which turned him all flustered. He then asked about your day to which you answered that you had thought of finally picking up dancing again after much struggle.

“Why did you struggle?”

You lowered your head. “Because the last time I danced, it only brought me misery.”

You were at your last bite, but suddenly didn’t feel like finishing anymore. Before, you had felt something like easiness, even happiness almost for quite a constant while. Now, your thoughts got thrown back to your stalker who was roaming around in freedom.

“If it’s your passion, you shouldn’t lose sight of it. Because you don’t know whether you will still be able to enjoy it whenever you want in your future.”

You didn’t know what he meant with that, but he wasn’t keen on explaining either as he gathered your plates and brought them over to the sink the moment after.

It was the first evening in a long while that you peacefully enjoyed without a burdened heart. You wouldn’t mind this becoming your routine.

Later that evening, when you had washed out the dye and dried your hair, you hid in the backyard of your house where no one could see you with earplugs in and the MP3 player attached to your body, picking up some ballet moves again.

Sheltered from the whole outside world, you tried to let the fact sink in that you were safe here and that no one would come to make your life miserable after a performance. Here, you could actually be at peace again.

And then, you danced until it turned dark.

When you returned to the inside, Jaehyun had accidentally fallen asleep on the couch with a book on his chest. On tip-toes, you sneaked up to him and wanted to take the book out of his hand to put a blanket over him when something suddenly urged you to halt.

The first two buttons of his white shirt were open, and right there, between the first and second one, you spotted a scar.

Of course. A detective always went hand-in-hand with danger. He was your husband, you saw him every day, yet this was the first time that you noticed this visible mark on his chest. How many more dangers had he encountered so far? How many more bullets had he caught during his young career? You knew nothing about it.

You stretched out your hand, determined to touch the spot, but snapped out of your trance-like state just before you laid your fingers on him. In your head, you scolded yourself. What in the hell were you thinking, behaving like such a creep?

You tried to calm yourself down when suddenly, Jaehyun’s hand snatched forward and wrapped around your wrist before you could even blink. You got bent forward over the backrest with his other arm then enclosed around your neck, his eyes full with surprise as he brought your face close to his.

“You’re so beautiful.” Barely a whisper from him.

You stared at each other for a moment in near disbelief, and you didn’t know where the ground and where the ceiling was anymore as everything around you seemed to rotate. Your whole body felt so hot as though you were suffering from a fever, but your heart beating out of its usual rhythm told you that the reason for your body reacting this way was nowhere near something rational things could explain.

A part of you wanted to break free, another part wanted to look into his soft eyes just a bit longer.

“It’s you!” With a sigh of relief, Jaehyun let go of you and fell back down on the couch. “I wasn’t able to recognize you at first because of your new hair! I thought it was a thief or something!”

“Ha.” You couldn’t even explain the sounds coming out of your mouth anymore, and thus decided to remain quiet about it. “I’ll go take a shower.”

“Okay. I’ll go to bed then. Good night.”

When the door fell close behind you, you leaned against the bathroom’s tiles, trying to calm yourself down once again. But even when you placed your palms on your cheeks a few minutes later, you were still hot all over.

Staring at your face in the mirror over the sink, you gritted your teeth, having tried to fight against this feeling for so long. But looking at your reflection, you came to the realization that this was the expression of someone who had lost this fight a long time ago.

You had never wanted this to happen, because you wanted a way out of this fake marriage someday. 

Now, it seemed like the exit door was blocked by your own feelings.

____

“Can I tell you something?” Rosie asked you the next time you gathered to play poker. “Because you’re my friend now, I want to be honest with you.”

Mrs. Jones was currently giving out the cards, and while you collected them, you nodded. “Go ahead. Is it my hair? You’ve been staring at it forever. I like it though.”

“I love the color, but it obviously looks like you did it yourself. Why didn’t you call me? I could have helped!”

“I’m sorry, it was an urge, I’m very impulsive. So, what is it then?”

“To be honest, in the beginning, you and Jay didn’t quite radiate the happiness of newlyweds to me. You were so distant and cold towards each other,” Rosie laid out her first impression. “I thought it was because of the cultural difference. I know from grandmother Anh that in Asia, public display of affection is not very common and you both immigrated from there. But it was like…” She halted. “Like you were strangers. Not familiar with each other at all. As though you had just met.”

You didn’t know how to properly react to this revelation, and Rosie wanted to apologize right away before grandmother Anh stepped in to support her, “I second that. You tried so hard to conceal it and pretended to be a happy couple, but my old eyes can see beyond that. When he bought the music player for you though… I knew that something had entirely changed between you two.”

Between you two?

You had only assumed that for you things had changed since the day of the festival. When he had looked a little too good that day. When he had smiled a little too genuine. When he had held your hand a little too long.

But never for him either.

“Everything has changed,” grandmother Anh continued. “You look so in love, just like when my late husband was courting me back then.”

You pressed your lips together to a fine line and you tried so hard not to blush, but to no avail as you looked into everyone’s eyes and encountered a smug grin from each side. 

No, you were wrong. The day of the festival was the day you had assumed first, admitting it to yourself the day you had picked up ballet again. But something had changed for you before all that. Slowly, continuously. And it was still in process.

“See?” Rosie teased. “This is how Jay looked as well when I told him exactly the same!”

“Quit joking,” you replied briefly, but your voice only came out as a whisper while the hotness wandered further to the very tips of your ears. “You’re giving out cards now or what?”

“Let me tell you something!” Mrs. Jones now meddled too, not wanting to be left out. “After so many years of marriage, I haven’t seen my husband getting so stressed about buying a gift for me, not even on my birthday!”

But you hadn’t even talked to each other regularly back then when Jaehyun was looking for the MP3 player for you. 

It just didn’t make sense to you.

Or were you just in denial because it couldn’t actually be possible? After everything that had happened between you two, Jaehyun had grown fond of you from the very beginning already, even before you? 

“Oh dear, why are you making such a face?” Grandmother Anh sounded worried as your hands still laid on the table, not touching the cards you had been given while everyone else had already picked up theirs. “Are you not feeling well?”

You were certainly not feeling well. Your stomach had turned upside down, and you suddenly felt like you couldn’t breathe, on the verge of a collapse. While it had become so obvious to everyone around you, you had been left in the dark this entire time.

“I need to get fresh air.”

You arose, pushing the chair under you away with your legs and hurried to the entrance door before you thought you were going to run out of air entirely now. But even the outside didn’t make a difference, and you were supporting your arms against the wall while breathing in and out heavily.

After a while, you heard the entrance door open and close again, and judging by the shoes that you could see from your position, Rosie had followed you to the outside. 

“I called Jaehyun to pick you up.”

“What?!” Your eyes widened and you felt your stomach turn. In your hot ears, you heard it ringing while simultaneously, your loud heartbeats tried to steal the show. “I’m all fine!”

“Yeah,” she chuckled. “But I thought you’d rather want to be with your husband today than with us, and this is a good excuse to leave the round. Just pretend to be a little dizzy.”

“Rosie!” you called her out while the next moment, you heard fast footsteps approaching in your direction. “I’m not coming to your birthday barbecue anymore next week!”

“I know you’re lying.” She winked.

“Are you okay?!” Jaehyun came to a halt in front of you, totally out of breath and beads of sweat visible on his forehead. He only needed a brief moment to take a breather before he faced you, his features drawn with apprehension, his eyes mirroring pure concern. 

The next moment, his palms were on your cheeks, and he gasped, feeling your heat burning against his skin.

“You’re all glowing and hot!” Jaehyun stated in shock. “Do you have a fever?”

“I-I’m… I’m all fine!” you tried to brush it off, but his hands cupping your face possibly made it only worse as you felt like melting from within.

“Jay, you need to take her home, okay?” Rosie persuaded him. “The gathering is over. Have a good night!”

With these words, she turned around and closed the door behind her, leaving you alone with Jaehyun. Despite having been alone with him so often already, with all this new knowledge, everything was different now.

You were jittery and all nervous around him, having problems looking into his eyes, and he noticed of course - but for all the wrong reasons.

“Come, we’re going home! You’re sleeping in the bed tonight, no questions asked. I’ll get a few more blankets so you’ll have it all warm in case you’re catching a fever. Tomorrow, you’ll be doing fine again, no worry. It’s probably the change in weather since it’s been unusually hot these past days for spring.”

You hadn’t ever seen him so talkative and openly expressing worry, and it somehow took you by surprise. Goosebumps raised all over your arm as Jaehyun’s hand slid down your side and his fingers intertwined with yours.

There were no other people aside from you out here at this hour, there was no need to pretend being a couple - yet, he held your hand as you walked all the way up to your house in silence.

It didn’t feel real to you.

But the night sky was your witness.

____

A few days later, long after nighttime had fallen, you were lying on your mattress, still wide awake like the nights before. 

You hadn’t noticed until now, but your life wasn’t so dull anymore. You weren’t on the verge of depression anymore in contrast to the first month in your new home. You had made new friends, had picked up your passion for ballet again, trained during daytime, and spent the evenings with Jaehyun, cooking, eating and then watching a movie or taking a stroll on the hill behind your house together. 

It was an entire different life from the one you had lived back at home in Seoul, but nothing you enjoyed less. No, which you enjoyed even more, if you said so yourself. 

A warm feeling embraced you every time the clock approached the hour your husband would return home, and even though you saw each other every day, it was like seeing him for the first time, your heart almost jumping out of your chest whenever he walked through the door, greeting you with a smile.

You were able to clearly name that feeling now that made you so excited, you were barely able to sleep at night while Jaehyun was lying in the room next to you, sleeping peacefully.

Or… could he not either?

There were noises coming from the bedroom. You sat straight up on your mattress, feeling a rush of hotness wash over you with your heart beating out of its usual rhythm. Flipping the blanket over, your naked feet touched the wooden floor, but you didn’t bother slipping into your shoes.

You tiptoed to the bedroom to make sure that your ears hadn’t misled you, but you swore you could hear him walking up and down in there as well. With a trembling hand, you placed your fingers on the handle, but before you could even think about how in the hell you could explain what you were doing in front of Jaehyun’s bedroom in the middle of the night, only dressed in your light pajamas, the door suddenly opened from the other side.

Jaehyun was just as shocked to see you as you were shocked to see him. You wanted to stutter something about sleepwalking, but as you made eye contact, you realized that he wasn’t expecting an explanation from you.

He wasn’t expecting anything as he closed the last remaining gap between you two, his hands cupping your face again, this time to pull you against his chest. 

And as his lips met yours, you now were assured that he had lied awake every night like you as well. 

____

With hasty movements, Jaehyun unbuttoned your pajama top all while not letting his lips slip from yours, his fingers rather fumbling, but knowing exactly and precisely what they were doing and the carelessness most likely stemming from pent-up anticipation, because he was finally getting what he had wanted all along:

You.

You felt him smiling into the next kiss that came rather sloppy in his hurry as your shirt glided from your shoulders, the palpable traces along your skin getting replaced by Jaehyun’s fingers that drew down the same path in a feathery-light manner. 

He was holding himself back until it almost hurt, you felt it as his fingers’ grips were first tight, then froze and softened lastly. But you didn’t want him to hold back. You had both been holding back for way too long already.

Both of your hands slung around Jaehyun’s neck as you deepened the kiss until it almost became hard for you to breathe, that was how wildly and hungrily you were craving for each other. With a little jump, you also hooked your legs around his waist, feeling him supporting you instinctively from the bottom with a strong grip.

You moved from the door frame to the bed where Jaehyun seated himself down and placed you on his lap, but you had no intention of moving away as your fingers vanished under his shirt and pulled it over his head in one swift motion.

But Jaehyun’s lips didn’t find their way back to your mouth. Instead, they traveled down the side of your neck, eliciting a moan from you in the process, and stopped by the raising of your breasts. You threw your head back, your nails digging into the flesh of his shoulders, leaving red marks as he took your nipple between his lips.

Sucking sounds mixed with the audible rhythm of your heavy breathing, thwarted by suppressed squeals whenever he bit into it, pulling it between his teeth and teasing you until you couldn’t take it anymore. So Jaehyun then wrapped his arms around you and flipped you both around.

“You have no idea for how long I’ve been holding back,” he told you with an expression on his face that you had never encountered before as he was hovering over you. 

Lust, desire, and so much… passion. 

Yes, you for sure had had no idea. But you luckily did now. 

Strands of your red hair had gotten disheveled, partially disturbing your view, and he brushed them off, smiling. For a short while, you shared a moment of loving understanding, and your heart thumbed so fast against your chest, you were scared he was going to hear it.

There was a distinct feeling growing inside of you that didn’t want to admit. That you couldn’t confess, not even to yourself. Because you knew, this was only temporary.

“Then show me,” you challenged him.

“Very well.”

His grin widened, revealing his teeth even in the semi-darkness when his mouth came back down on yours, his hands roaming across almost every single inch of your body as though he wanted to keep a map of your body in his mind. As though he shared the exact same thought with you:

That this was not permanent, struggling with holding himself back to prolong the experience and going through with the act as fast as possible because he had been looking forward to it for so long already.

Jaehyun’s lips left yours, passing by your neck and tracing down to your stomach where he placed butterfly kisses around your navel, and you shuddered from the soft touches that you had been missing out on for a very long time already.

Your hands disappeared in the thickness of his hair as his lips further approached your nether regions, and you gave him credit for still being so patient when release was so close as it made you almost go crazy in contrast.

Tender warmth covered your core, the fabric of your pajama bottoms being the only barrier between the two of you, and you craved for nothing more than to feel his tongue inside you right now, feel how it dipped into your wetness, his mouth doing the same as he had done to your breasts before.

But Jaehyun’s patience had reached its limit. There was nothing left of it anymore.

After several moments of internal conflict, Jaehyun decided to not withhold anymore and to go for it instead. At the end, he had the entire night, and he would make use of every single second he had left.

The mattress gave in under you when he hooked his fingers into the waistband of your pajama bottoms after he had removed his own boxers, the feeling of his weight then carefully pressing back down on you, now the both of you entirely naked. It felt so surreal to you as you locked your gazes, and you needed a moment to process this situation, to let the fact sink in that this was indeed real.

Then, as though he had just done the same, Jaehyun eased between your thighs and started to enter you. The night was still so long, but it felt like he didn’t want to lose any time, and neither did you. You hadn’t noticed how wet you had gotten throughout the foreplay which had made his entrance so easy, almost imperceptible.

Your pupils rolled to the ceiling as he adjusted and you finally felt him inside you fully. You couldn’t quite remember the last man you had been intimate with, even though it had happened only shortly before moving here, but somehow, Jaehyun had clouded your memories of every other man in your life who wasn’t him at this point.

As a matter of fact, on the contrary, you now knew that you had never desired another man this much. Every fiber of your body was longing for him so badly that despite him being right here, it ached so much not to have him even closer. And that wasn’t even physically possible.

“What’s wrong?” Jaehyun asked suddenly, having noticed your conflicted expression and coming to a halt.

You shook your head. No, nothing was wrong. Everything was perfect, it was almost unbelievable.

“I-... I…” You were so overwhelmed by your feelings, the words nearly slipped carelessly out of your mouth. Luckily, for you though, you were able to swallow all of them. Instead, you said, “I’m just so happy.”

The corners of Jaehyun’s lips tilted up, and he took this moment of sweetness to tenderly peck your lips and confess, “Me too. I’m happy too.”

Soft moans fell from your lips as he started moving inside of you again. His motions were deliberate and powerful, and you enjoyed every single thrust of his. Jaehyun was so excited, but put you first still, and you appreciated that.

There were times, his thrusts seemed insatiable as he rammed into you nearly in a trance, seeking for his release, but despite you enjoying these rough phases very much as well, he always calmed down and feeded you with slow, sensual pushes that put you on the verge of being delighted and desperately wanting more.

His lips were wet and warm against your lips when his hips got a rest on top of yours, and you were quick to hook your ankles around his waist when he picked up his pace for the nth time, but this time being the last that would finally bring the long awaited release, you both knew at that moment.

Jaehyun’s chest glistened with a paper thin layer of sweat, and your eyes wandered along his neck to his face where you watched him in awe changing his features to a more tensed one, working towards your orgasms. Your fingers slithered up his arms that were propped up to the left and right of yours, and you held tightly onto him, breaking your eye contact to not let his hard work go to waste and concentrate on yourself.

You bit into his arm as you came, and he let out a groan, whether it was because of your bite or because of him reaching his own heights as he released into the sheets next to you, you didn’t know. But at that moment, as you slipped out of this world for a few seconds, you wished that you could have this for the rest of your life.

Especially for - no, because of - what followed after.

Your grumpy and always stoic husband rolled onto the space next to you to take a rest, a smile spreading across his face that just wouldn’t vanish anymore as he turned his head aside and looked at you. And you genuinely felt the same. 

Instinctively, you moved over to him, and he stretched out his arms to pull you onto his chest where you laid yourself down. You didn’t say anything for a long time until you felt him pressing his lips on your forehead.

Now, you truly felt like you had arrived at home.

There, it was so warm, and so comfortable that you wanted to stay forever.

____

Rosie’s birthday barbecue took place the next day where the festival had been held weeks prior. If anything, you knew by now that her father, the pharmacist and major apparently, technically built this village. Aside from the pharmacy, he owned several other stores here.

Unfortunately, you had come all by yourself. 

Jaehyun had left early in the morning already, rudely awakened by a call from his supervisor, so you weren’t able to fully concentrate on celebrating Rosie’s big day right now as you wished, but for reasons that couldn’t wipe that grin from your face.

Your thoughts revolved around Jaehyun as well as around what had happened the night before - several times in different positions as though he had feared he was running out of time to do all this to you.

This morning, you had woken up with your limbs entangled and strands of your hair in his face, but he hadn’t complained. Instead, after getting the call, he had pulled you closer to him, lying in bed with you a few minutes more and even kissing you goodbye when he had walked out of the door.

You flushed when you recalled the memories.

“My, my! What’s that?” Rosie called you out as she took the seat next to you. “What’re you blushing for? Long night with your husband?”

“Rosie!” you called out indignantly, totally shocked, but she only laughed.

“Come on, nobody heard! Lucky you!”

You shook your head and shifted a small box in your friend’s direction. “Open it.”

“What are you doing?” Rosie feigned upset. “I told you to not get me anything!”

“Well, the gift shopping area in this village is very limited, but I didn’t want to come empty-handed.”

You could tell Rosie was very excited as her fingers fiddled with the ribbon that held the gift wrap together. As she untied it, a small, flat box was revealed.

“It’s not much, but where I come from, these are very trendy now, and I’m more of a personal gift giver than buying something random. My husband had to order them from the internet, but the rest was made by me. I hope you like it.”

Rosie stilled her motions. “Did you just say ‘my husband’?”

Did you? You gasped nearly inaudibly. You had never referred to him like this before, and truth to be told, you hadn’t even intended to do so now. It had just slipped somehow.

Your friend giggled. “Your husband always refers to you as ‘my wife’, and I found it odd that you hadn’t until now. Perhaps, it took you longer to get used to it, right?”

“...Right.” You kneaded your fingers in uncertainty.

“Are you kidding?!” Rosie then squealed as she opened her gift fully and pulled out a pearl bracelet. “It’s so cute!”

It was made of freshwater pearls in different colors that you had beaded yourself with all the colors Rosie liked the best. You had never seen her wearing jewelry, so she apparently didn’t want to bother taking them on and off.

“It’s an elastic band, so you don’t have to close and open it every morning. You can wear it all the time or take it off and put it on easily.”

Rosie pulled it over her hand and held her wrist against the sunlight. “Such pretty colors! Thank you so much! I will cherish this all my life! It’s a token of our friendship!”

She cuddled you a little bit too tight for your liking, but you didn’t mind. You hadn’t seen such an openly pure reaction to your gifts ever when you had given presents to your friends or family all along. And they had been more expensive and impressive than what you had given to Rosie.

Here, life was much easier. People seemed to be content and satisfied with the little things life had to offer, that was why they had chosen to stay in the countryside. You admired this mindset as people in the big city always thrived to achieve more and to be better than everyone else. 

You wanted to be more like Rosie and the villagers.

“Okay, let’s eat now! The meat is ready!”

You really wanted to enjoy the barbecue, and more often than not, you earnestly did. But watching Mr. and Mrs. Jones' banter-like but loving interactions, along with many other married and dating couples, made you long for something which you had never expected to be missing. 

“What is it, dear?” Grandmother Anh then asked you as most of the people were slowly finishing their meals and moved on to play with the children or to talk with each other. “You look so somber.”

You, among only a handful of other guests who were still eating, had remained in their seats. Next to you, there was an extra plate with food that hadn’t been touched yet.

“Grandmother Anh…” You turned to her, your eyes expressing exactly what was going on inside of you. “Is it possible to miss someone so much, your heart hurts even though you had only been together in the morning?”

Because that was how you were feeling now. You wanted to be around Jaehyun all day, all night, not missing out on his presence even a single moment. Where you had loathed his existence before, it was all you could think about now and how you’d probably die of a heartache if he was ever gone.

You had never experienced something close to this.

“Oh dear…” Grandmother Anh squeezed your arm and smiled compassionately. “I miss my husband starting from the moment I open my eyes in the morning. And I even felt like that when he was still with me. We weren’t separated for a single day, and I know that even now, he’s with me.”

Because they loved each other wholeheartedly. You couldn’t say the same about what Jaehyun felt for you.

“But why are you so upset right now, dear?” she asked you. “He’s here now.”

“... what?”

You looked up and spotted Jaehyun walking down the street in your direction. You suppressed the urge to blink a few times in case this wasn’t real. But grandmother Anh had just said so, and he would be standing right in front of you not too long from now.

Suddenly, you were all nervous and excited like a child on the first day of school. Jumping out of your chair, hitting the table’s edge in the process and flushing to your cheeks, you didn’t quite know what to do at first. You wanted to run towards him and jump into the safety of his arms like this morning, but were too shy to do so.

What if he rejected you?

What if last night and this morning were an exception?

What if he had returned to being the reserved and taciturn Jaehyun from the beginning?

These were thoughts that were running through your head when you were standing there awkwardly to welcome him.

“I…” you then started when he stopped right in front of you, his mien not quite expressive enough for you to read. “I saved you some meat and potato salad.”

You didn’t know what you were saying, you were only trying to downplay this awkwardness that had weighed down the lighthearted atmosphere of the party as Jaehyun also clearly didn’t know how to behave after your intimate encounters.

“Are there n-”

But your words got stuck in your throat as Jaehyun stretched out his arms and cupped your glowing cheeks with his palms. It was almost magical how instantly, you were able to calm down. Then, he pulled you towards him, covering your lips with his as though he had been waiting all day only to do that.

As he kissed you there, in front of everyone, chastely, but also deeply, you knew that this wasn’t an act. This was not staged for the villagers to believe that you were a truly married couple.

This was honest. His feelings were real.

“God, I’ve wanted to do that all day,” he admitted, tucking a strand of your hair that had gotten loose behind your hair. “I thought time would never pass.”

And you were on the same page.

You were still on the same page when the front door of your house closed behind you later that evening and Jaehyun shoved you against the door, devouring all of you with an open mouth and his tongue, his fingers locked with yours in a tight grip, pinned against the wall above your head.

You were still on the same page when he bent you over the kitchen counter, not even showing the slightest patience by undressing you clothing for clothing as he just dragged your pants down and pushed into you from behind with a long-suppressed groan that made you scream in excitement.

You were still on the same page when you laid your palms flat on the surface in the illusion of getting support, moving along his length to meet his thrusts whenever he pulled out to just slam back into you full-force, because you couldn’t take being apart from him for even a second.

You were still on the same page when you were shaking from past-orgasm spasm, his cum dripping down your hips as he had released on your back, and he carried you on his hands to the bedroom with the words,

“I’m not done yet.”

It was raw.

And it was real.

____

For the fifth morning in a row, you woke up next to Jaehyun. And every time, it still felt so surreal to you that you wanted to give yourself a pinch to make sure this was real. But whenever you turned to his side, his arms tightly wrapped around you, and looked into his eyes that were so sincere and clear, you didn’t mind if this was a dream after all if only you wouldn’t wake up from it.

But today, his expression was clouded, and you could tell something was bothering him gravely that he couldn’t let go of.

“What is it?” you asked him, barely awake yet, but irritated that he wasn’t cuddling with you as usual. “Did something happen?”

It was odd. The fact that you could live with a person for so long and still know nothing about them. That was what Jaehyun told you the next moment.

“What do you mean?”

“That you don’t know my biggest secret yet. And that it might make you hate me.”

You feared that your whole world would teeter under your feet the further he spoke about what he had to confess to you. At this point, you loved him so much, you didn’t know what could possibly make you hate him. After all, he was a detective, and one of the good ones.

The last thing he would have done was kill an innocent person.

… right?

Jaehyun’s struggles were almost palpable for you as he inhaled and exhaled deeply, the muscles on his chest straining and never seeming to relax anymore as he withdrew into a deep hole of silence.

Minutes passed without him crawling out of it, and you sat up yourself, leaning against the headboard while Jaehyun was leaning forward, not facing each other. You wanted to hug him from the back to give him comfort, but also sensed that this would only restrain him from crossing over the final line he was so close to reaching.

And he really wanted to pass it.

“I could never hate you,” you told him. “I l-...” You gulped. “You’re a good person. What would ever make me hate you?”

“Not even knowing that I ruined someone’s life?”

There it was. The elephant in the room that rendered you totally motionless and emotionless. Ruining someone’s life was a wide term and could come in many shapes and forms, each that had a different impact on the victim, and the culprit. 

You desperately wanted to know Jaehyun’s dimension, and you knew he desperately, finally wanted to tell you.

“Explain to me. Has it got something to do with the scar on your chest?”

“Yes. As a detective, my job is to protect the victims. But I failed to do so once when I purposely hurt them.”

“How so?”

Jaehyun bent further forward, and you perceived how he lifted his hands to ruffle his hair in aggravation before he continued, “Last week, at Rosie’s birthday party when I got called to my supervisor, I told you it was about my case.”

You nodded. You hadn’t pushed the topic, because if Jaehyun had wanted to talk, he would have come forward. And now, it was apparently the time.

“This case has brought me here to this witness protection program. I’m clearing my name and serving my sentence, because I hurt a victim. The trial is long finished since the victim decided not to press charges, but hurting a hostage is not seen as a peccadillo among the police nonetheless. After I got suspended for a few months, I got sent here to prove myself again while working in another unit and eventually return to the NYPD.”

You had a hard time processing what Jaehyun tried to get into your head. Inwardly, you were repeating every single syllable until they settled.

“I ruined a life. That hostage, a woman… I shot at her,” he pressed bitterly through gritted teeth. “There, you have it. The reason to hate me.”

Your brow arched. “I don’t quite understand. Why did you shoot at a hostage?”

Being nosy was one of your characteristics, but the best part of it was that you never judged a situation before you got all the details, and you hadn’t collected enough details to waive Jaehyun’s action as something bad yet.

“The kidnapper was holding her hostage with a gun pointed at her head.” 

It was difficult for Jaehyun to speak about this situation, you could tell from the way he expressed himself, with hitches and deep breathers in between, but you gave him all the time he needed.

You lifted your hand and touched his back in a reassuring gesture, scared he would shy away, but still wanted to try. Instead of retreating, you felt his muscles relaxing under your palm, and you exhaled in relief, letting him know you were there for emotional support, no matter what was to come.

And what was about to come was really hard to digest.

“Instead of shooting at the kidnapper, I shot at the hostage’s leg. Of course I didn’t want to hurt her on purpose, but at this moment, it was the best thing that I could do. I could see it in his eyes. He really wanted to pull the trigger, that was how ruthless and brutal he was. As soon as I would shoot at him, he would shoot at her. So I had to do the last thing a policeman is supposed to do, and aimed at the hostage instead.”

Your forehead was in creases. You couldn’t grasp the entire situation as it sounded just so absurd to you. As a ballerina in the spotlight, you had never gotten in touch with this dark side of the world.

But Jaehyun was a good person. So good, that he omitted the entire story from you.

“You shot at the hostage, because an injured hostage is useless to the culprit,” it suddenly became clear to you. “You’re not a bad person, Jaehyun. That’s very courageous. And honorable as you did everything to save the hostage.”

His shoulders shook, and you were irritated whether he was laughing or crying. Until you noticed that his shaking was actually trembling, and that he was uttering indistinct sounds. Only moments later, you realized that he was, indeed, silently crying.

You just weren’t sure whether these were tears of guilt or tears of relief for finally coming clear with you.

“The scar… it’s from a bullet, right? Did he shoot directly at you after that? Is that how you got it?” 

“Even if, at the moment I pulled the trigger, he let go of the culprit and shot at me, I didn’t save her life.”

You felt a tight knot in your stomach. “Jaehyun… that woman… is she still alive?”

It didn’t sound like she didn’t survive the entire incident, but you wanted to hear it from him. Almost instinctively, he nodded with much hesitation, and relief washed over you. 

“But at what cost?” he broke through your thoughts. “That woman… one of her legs was rendered useless. I hit der at such an unfortunate spot-”

“But she still has her life,” you interfered. “And you risked your own life for her. You were ready to die for a victim. But she’s still alive, and you as well. That’s all that matters.”

“All that matters? Here’s the thing you’ll hate me for…” He sucked in a rush of air. “She was a professional ballerina. Just like you.”

You didn’t know what to say. Perhaps, it was best to not say anything at all now.

For a ballerina to lose the ability to use even one of her legs was the most unfortunate thing that could happen. All your life, you were trained to rely on your legs. They were your pillars that carried your passion, your career. You were dependent on your legs. You hadn’t learned how to use anything else to get through life.

You leaned forward and replaced the palm of your hand on his back with both of your arms. Gentle, you snuggled up against him and held him in your arms, resting your head in the crook of his neck and closing your eyes, listening to his silent cries.

“Jaehyun. Still. You didn’t ruin a life.”

Everything happening in the past weeks suddenly made so much sense to you. Why Jaehyun had been behaving so hostile upon seeing you for the first time, why he hadn’t wanted you to think so lowly about your safety, why he had wanted you to pick up your passion again, why he had bought you the MP3 player…

“You saved hers.”

Reluctantly, he placed his arms over yours. You really felt his insecurity, but your support was unwavering, and you let him know.

“And you saved yours as well. No lives were lost. You’re a good detective.”

At that moment, you assumed that you were the first person he actually opened up to. And the first person who actually truly understood his deepest feelings.

“Thank you.”

Jaehyun turned to you and kissed you. It tasted of tears and despair. 

And a bit of wishful thinking.

____

“I’m still in therapy because of it,” Jaehyun spoke the day after when he was ready to pick up the topic again. “Well, when I’m in New York, I mean.”

It was constantly warm outside nowadays, you two sitting on the slope of the hill behind your house, and you couldn’t wait to finally embrace summer fully in this part of the world where you had never experienced this season before. 

Your hair was glowing in the bright sunlight. Jaehyun liked to compare it to a pink rose when you woke up in the mornings and he ran his fingers through the strands.

“That’s good,” you coaxed him, showing full support ever since his confession. “I think it’s always good to speak with a professional about traumatic experiences. They will never go away at some point, but we all have to learn to live with them.”

You stood by your opinion that Jaehyun had had no other choice and actually had made the right decision in this situation. You respected him for that, and you had learned that the hostage, who had attended the trial of course, thought so as well as she had voiced during the process.

It was only the inner demons Jaehyun was fighting now, and you would help him get every single one of them caged.

“It’s odd.”

“What is?”

You stretched yourself, enjoying the warmth. “The fact that I know about your most traumatic experience, but not even where you were born.”

“I was born in Seoul, as a matter of fact,” he clarified instantly.

“The city where I live?” you called out in surprise. 

Jaehyun nodded. “I lived there with my mom until I graduated from high school. Then I went to New York because my dad has been working there, and pursued a career as a policeman.”

You pulled grass between your fingers, the mild breeze playing with the tips of your hair strands. “Why did you want to join the police?”

“I’m good at solving cases. And I really want to help people, but didn’t have the patience to go to med school.” Jaehyun looked up, smiling softly against the wind. “Why did you take up ballet classes?”

Yeah… why? You shrugged. “It was something I was passionate about ever since I was a little child.” Your reasoning was not as extensive and detailed as his, but for you, it had always been enough.

And for Jaehyun as well. He turned his head against the sky and basked in the sun. “That’s great. Anything else you want to know?”

“Fair enough, since you knew every fact about me before I even set foot in this country. Do you have siblings?” you jumped at the chance. 

“No.”

“Favorite food?” 

“Nothing specific. I like anything.”

“A country you’d like to visit one day?”

“Japan.”

“A country you have visited and is your favorite?”

He smiles. “I’ve only been to South Korea and here, so… Here.”

“Can you imagine going back there though?” you then asked. “To Seoul, I mean.”

“Absolutely not.”

You didn’t know why his answer hurt you. Disappointment seeped deep into your heart at the realization that your real home and his real home were separated by an entire ocean if you were ever to go back. 

“Do you miss your home?” Jaehyun then returned.

Did you still?

You weren’t so sure about that anymore. You missed your family and your friends, as a matter of fact, and not a day passed in which you didn’t think about them. But not as much and as hurtful as in the beginning where tears had kept you up all night. Your sadness had stepped back, making space for a feeling that was much greater.

But you didn’t want to tell him that.

“Yeah, I do.”

Jaehyun shifted his head back to you. “I can imagine that.”

He kissed you then, right at your favorite spot in the entire village, his fingers entangled in your rosy hair. You felt so happy, yet so regretful as you hadn’t had any memory of a moment where you had been at such a high in your life back there in Seoul.

There, you had everything. The spotlight, your family and your friends. But despite everything, right here and now was where your heart was going to burst because you didn’t know how much bliss it could still grasp.

There were so many more questions you wanted to still ask him.

How his life back there in New York was. How he imagined life when this was all over. Whether he had someone he held dear back home.

But you swallowed all of them down. You were scared of the answers.

You didn’t need to know every little detail about a person’s life to fall in love with them. All it took was to know how they treated others, how they treated you and their outlook on life, nothing more.

Not even their real name.

The rest would fall into place.

Deep down, you had accepted your new life with every aspect it offered itself to you, and whenever you thought about the village and its people, a certain warmth enclosed your heart that nearly made you teary-eyed.

You didn’t want to leave anymore. That was now clear to you.

____

Call it intuition. Gut feeling. A woman’s instinct.

Whatever it was called that you were experiencing that day, it would be right. Your whole world crashed when Jaehyun walked through the door after work that day.

“You have to leave,” were his first words as soon as he spotted you. “Now.”

“... what?”

With widened eyes, you watched the sweat drops on his forehead slowly rolling along his temples. Had he run all the way here? And why did he seem so anxious as though he was trying to uphold a friend? You had never seen him like this.

“Go pack your things. You have five minutes.”

“Jaehyun…” You stood up from the couch. “I don’t understand, only last wee-”

“It’s all settled,” he interjected calmly but curtly. “The day I got called to my supervisor, you remember? They told me I was free to return to the NYPD. My job here is done as they finally found someone else for you. I can go back home, to my old life.”

“That means…?” You halted. You wanted to cover your ears. You didn’t want to hear.

But Jaehyun broke the hard truth down for you. “You’ll be moved to another city, get assigned another fake husband, exactly. The driver will be here in a few.”

You were flabbergasted at how factual his way of delivering the news to you was. “You only stayed with me to deal with your bad conscience, right? Because I’m a ballerina as well, and for protecting me, you would pay your debt? Now that the time is over, you want to get rid of me?”

Of course you hoped he would deny everything you had just accused him of. But he didn’t. This was like a nightmare.

“This program works like that,” Jaehyun explained to you like you were some twelve year old, with much repulsion written all over his face. “You move from one city to another, from one husband to another. You brought this upon yourself.”

Here was the deal with anger. You didn’t feel how it got implanted into you. You couldn’t feel it grow and feed on your pain. Suddenly, it was there, and you didn’t have any control over it until, from one moment to another, it made itself aware verbally and physically.

You wanted to scream, grab for the nearest vase nearby and throw it against the wall, yelling at him how much of an asshole he could be, leading you on this entire time. But sometimes, people were stronger than anger.

And so were you.

He had never led you on. You had always been aware of the rules. He didn’t owe you anything.

“Is that all?” you only brought out dryly, the vowels stuck in your throat. 

You didn’t want to cry, you didn’t owe him a single tear in return, not a single word anymore, because you had known all along that this was about to come eventually. 

This… all this wasn’t real. This wasn’t your life. And the next one wouldn’t be your real life either.

You didn’t know what your next fake home and fake husband would be like. You didn’t know for how long they’d stay this time. All you knew was that you didn’t want them. You didn’t want anyone else other than Jaehyun.

“That’s all.”

But he didn’t want you anymore.

You just wondered how he could stand there, as stoic and taciturn and as cold as when you had first met. 

What had happened to the Jaehyun that woke up next to you every morning, playing with your hair, snuggling up against you and kissing the nape of your neck? The Jaehyun that showed you a different side every night, making you feel so special and loved? The Jaehyun that had let you into his deepest secrets?

Perhaps, he was just so good at his job. No wonder they wanted him back in the NYPD.

Your fingers grabbed just whatever piece of clothing they could find, regardless of whether you had picked up everything that belonged to you or not.

When you rolled your suitcase to the door a few minutes later, you had digested the first waves of shock and were only barely able to hold back your tears. You had expected that the end would come in little steps, with signs that would indicate the last days were approaching, giving you time to adjust, prepare and linger around.

Now, it was like ripping off a band aid. 

As you turned away from him, who had not moved since, tears were burning behind your eyes, but you didn’t want to lose your dignity in front of him. You wanted to defy him again, show him that you were just as strong as him and that it all didn’t bother you. That you had only played the role of a wife so perfectly, you had not only fooled the ones around you, but him as well - just as he had done with you.

But in contrast to Jaehyun, for you, it had meant everything to the point you had wished that this was your real life.

This, you couldn’t lie to yourself about. And it was the thing that hurt the most.

When the car pulled up the next moment, you expected Jaehyun to still say something to you, but he just stood there, with an expressionless face, watching you getting into the vehicle. Your eye contact didn’t break, even though you wished so. You just couldn’t tear your gaze away from him as you still hoped that he would raise his voice and beg you to stay.

And you would have.

But he didn’t.

When the car reverted, he just stood there. When you drove along the main street, he just stood there. Even when you were almost out of his sight, he just stood there.  

“You’re going to Phoenix this time, Miss!” the driver, the same as from your first day, told you, looking through the rear mirror. “I’m sure you’ll like it there!”

No, you wouldn’t. 

This was the most miserable day of your life, and still in the car, you broke down in tears.

You would have given everything to sit down with Rosie, grandmother Anh and Mrs. Jones just once again, playing cards and drinking wine. You would have given everything to go shopping with Rosie and hear her lighthearted laughter again. You would have given everything to eat grandmother Anh’s dumplings and get her advice again.

You would have given everything to just spend another day in the village, appreciating what you had had and saying goodbye to everyone.

But even this, he had pried out of your hands, rendering you so defenseless and vulnerable.

You hated him.

And whenever your gaze fell upon the key chain of the yellow elephant wearing a red tie on your purse, you cried even harder, wanting to rip it off and throw it out of the window.

But no matter how much you wanted to hate him and talk yourself into it, you couldn’t bring yourself to truly feel so.

You didn’t care about your old life anymore. You didn’t care whether you could never go back. You didn’t care about your career, about your future.

You were willing to give all of this up forever just to spend another day in the life that had been such an illusion, but had made you the happiest so far.

“Uhm… Miss…”

____

Klick.

The sound of the safety catch of a gun getting released.

“You’re late,” Jaehyun announced into the semi-darkness as he took the weapon back into his hand. “She’s not here anymore. She just left.”

“I know,” a voice he had never heard before, answered back. “I actually came for you.”

“Oh. Be my guest then.” Jaehyun chuckled with sarcasm. “I wasn’t sure when exactly you’d arrive since my people couldn’t find the flight you boarded, but this is what I call perfect timing as I just left the door open. So, how did you find us exactly?”

He shrugged. “You know… it cost me a fortune and a few private detectives, but I was always watching her, even during detention. I always knew where she was. That I’m only coming now is because I thought that eventually, when she sees that I’m free and behaving, she’d come back.” His voice cracked. “But she didn’t.”

Jaehyun remembered the night you had claimed to have heard someone roaming around in the bedroom or garden. So there had been truly someone among you, a private detective most likely. He hated himself at that moment for not having been able to protect you better. 

“You know what happened to the former guy she dated?” 

The stalker stepped into the light that flooded into the room from the window, and as Jaehyun looked into his face, he encountered a man who he, and probably every other person, would deem harmless at first glance. He looked like a normal office worker, not intimidating or even dangerous at all with his slicked back hair and wide glasses.

“They packed their things and went away as soon as they met me,” he illustrated, almost boastful with much pride in his voice. “One of them didn’t want to back off, so I had to slash his tires. That was when he got the message.”

“Lucky you that I’m not one of these guys. I’m not scared of you.” Jaehyun grinned. “I’m her husband, and I’m going to protect her at all costs.”

“She doesn’t belong to you!” he then yelled, throwing around his arms. “She belongs to me! … But… she’s always running away from me… She never comes back to me. Why would someone do that when you’re destined to be together?”

Despite the semi-darkness, Jaehyun saw the insanity coming forward in his eyes that gradually slowly took power of his entire body. He wasn’t familiar with stalking cases personally himself, but had read quite a few things prior to your arrival.

Clearly, this guy followed the delusional disbelief of your both’s romantic destiny despite you having made it clear several times that no such thing existed at your side. Yet, his obsession with you had made him want to continue being a part of your life and change your mind at all costs until it turned unhealthy and dangerous for you, watching you and following each of your steps. Admiration had quickly turned into the sadistic urge to torment you, because if he couldn’t have you, nobody could.

And now, you didn’t even deserve to live if it wasn’t with him.

“I’m not going to run away like the other guys,” Jaehyun spoke calmly. “I’m here to set an end to this, because she deserves to live freely and happily. And I want to give this to her.”

“No!” he screamed, sweat dripping down his temples, and only now, Jaehyun saw the blade glistening against the dim light. “She can only be happy with me! With me only, not with someone else or even alone!”

Jaehyun lifted up his arms and aimed the gun at him. He flinched. “She’s happy with me. How does that sound, asshole?”

Suddenly, he laughed. “If you shoot at me, you’re going to jail, and you’re not going to have her either.”

“I don’t care,” Jaehyun spoke calmly and the guy raised his brows. “I don’t care if I might go to jail because of this, because no one else before cared enough. I don’t care if I have to give my life for hers, because my life is not worth living if she’s dead. I don’t care if I have her or not. I just want her to be far away from you and live her life to the fullest, because she deserves it. Because this is what love is.”

“Oh, you fool.” He laughed again, this time like a maniac. “She has you in her force. That’s what she usually does.”

“Maybe.” Jaehyun’s finger enclosed the trigger. “But that’s what love also is. Forceful.”

The stalker raised his hand, the huge knife between his fingers fully visible now as he prepared himself to dash forward, but the second he moved, your voice echoed through the house.

“Stop!”

You stepped into the living room, totally out of breath, but lucky to have convinced the driver to turn around before it was too late after he had empathized very much with you during your breakdown in the car and told you the entire truth.

“It’s okay,” you breathed, having reached the premises only seconds ago. “I see it clearly now. I can’t be with you, Jaehyun. I can’t run away from my feelings either.” You smiled mildly and stepped closer to the stalker. “I see where I belong to.”

Jaehyun couldn’t believe what he had just heard. “What-!”

“I know we didn’t have a great start,” you said, your gaze not wavering from the guy who had made your life on earth a living hell, yet you tried to conceal that you were trembling all over and sweating in fear as this was the only way to save Jaehyun. “While you only wanted to protect me, I always tried to defy you. I felt caged, imprisoned and really unhappy. It was only later that I realized that you did all that because you cared. About my safety… about me.”

Jaehyun saw that you were directing these words to your tormentor, but he also saw that they were not lies. They were only directed at the wrong person.

“Yes, yes!” the guy blurted. “That’s totally it!”

“Will you now please put away the knife? I will willingly come with you.” Then, you finally spun around to Jaehyun. “Please put the gun away as well.”

“But-!”

“Please!”

Hesitantly, he did as he had been told, so did the persecutor. He knew where you had come from as the guy wouldn’t have done the same, but still didn’t find the thought to be so weaponless appealing. 

After the stalker had placed the knife on the kitchen counter, he turned around to you with a bright smile on his face, but it got wiped out very quickly - with your knuckles rolling nearly in slow motion over his cheek and continuing along the bridge of his nose. He lost balance and was thrown against a chair, folding like a piece of paper as he collapsed against the furniture.

Your fist had met his face full-force, and you stilled the seconds after, having totally caught him off guard - and yourself as well.

“The knife!” Jaehyun then screamed, reaching for his gun once again.

But as your fingers moved to reach for the weapon, your hand got slapped away and the blade vanished in front of your eyes and back into the possession of the stalker. Only this time, the knife was not the only thing he claimed to have taken control over.

The sharp blade slightly buried itself into the side of your neck as he had rendered you motionless by having you in a choke with his other arm wrapped around your middle. All your twisting and turning didn’t benefit you in any way as he was much taller and stronger, and you could only watch all the color drain from Jaehyun’s eyes as he looked back at you in horror.

“What wishful thinking, I’m such a fool,” the stalker whispered into your ear, blood streaming down your side, and the pain slowly overshadowed the shock you had initially felt. “If you can’t have someone yourself, all you can do is kill the person.”

You heard it click as Jaehyun was now pointing his gun at you. “Not before I kill you first.”

And then, there was pain.

____

When you were in the hospital, you dreamed of Jaehyun.

He was holding your hand at night, not leaving your side. It was tender and warm, just like the first time he had held your hand when you had joined the dinner with the other villagers. You could even hear what he was saying to you. Many words you had been longing to hear for so long.

Too bad that these were only fever dreams.

Because instead, when you woke up three days later, there was Rosie.

… Rosie!?

But you weren’t able to bring these words out as your throat was dry, so the syllables only came out as rasping sounds. She was quick to serve you a glass of water before you were finally able to ask,

“...Rosie? What happened?”

“Jesus!” she let out in wonder. “You can’t remember a thing?”

You shook your head. “Do you?” And then cocked your brow. “... what do you know exactly?”

“Jay told me everything. About you. About the program.” Your eyes widened and you prepared yourself to sit up, but Rosie gently pushed you back against the pillow. Only then you noticed that you couldn’t have made it further anyway. Your entire middle hurt. “It’s okay, lay still. Nobody can harm you anymore. He’s dead.”

“... dead?” You barely believed your own ears. 

Rosie nodded. “Jay’s bullet hit you, but it was only a graze, barely visible, but enough to take the stalker by surprise so that he suddenly let go of you. But… he was on top of you the next moment… with the knife.” She struggled to find the right words. “When I arrived after the reinforcement you called before… there was so much blood, and Jay was holding you in his arms… he was screaming… wailing. He thought he’d lost you, and so did I.”

You got stabbed?!

That would explain the immense pain that turned more distinct with each bypassing second, and you were so close to calling a nurse to pump some more morphine into you.

“W… what happened to… him?” you asked, though a part of you already knew the answer.

“Jay shot at him. He died on the spot.”

You didn’t blame yourself for feeling so much relief at this moment. For the past year, this man had robbed you of all your happiness and freedom. Now, it was all over. You were safe and free. You had every right to be happy.

But you weren’t.

“Where is…” Suddenly, you stilled as a dangerous thought crossed our mind. “Is he-”

“He’s fine.” The corner of Rosie’s lips tilted up. “Even now, you’re only thinking about him. He’s outside. Should I call him in?”

“Yes, please. And Rosie?” You reached for her hand, squeezing it. “Thank you for coming. It means a lot.”

She squeezed your fingers back. “Even though this life of yours wasn’t real… I know our friendship is.”

She was so right.

When Rosie left, Jaehyun didn’t come in right away. You waited for at least five more minutes until the handle moved downwards and the face you had been longing to see all along finally appeared in your room.

“How are you doing?” he asked, and it made you shudder how distant he sounded as opposed to the look in his eyes. 

They were telling a whole other story, and you wondered what was holding him back from running over to you and finally taking you into his arms. 

“Fine.”

The pain in your stomach really did feel fine when the pain in your heart was a much graver one.

“Don’t lie to me. You got stabbed right through. It’s not like it’s nothing.” He lowered his head. “And it’s my fault. Again.”

You saw where he was coming from after everything that he had been through. Your mind was still working only slowly as it hadn’t been able to make the connection right away, but now, it was all clear.

“It’s thanks to you that I’m still alive. I’m very grateful.”

Eventually, the pain in your stomach would pass, leaving only a scar. You couldn’t imagine what the stalker would have done to you if Jaehyun wouldn’t have been there. You counted yourself very lucky to still be alive.

“Thank you, honestly.”

He acknowledged your feelings with a nod, though you weren’t entirely convinced that he thought the same about you. And as he didn’t move away from the door further in your direction, you finally grasped that he just wasn’t there by your side yet. Not only physically, but also emotionally.

At some point, everything happening in the past months had been real for him too. But now that he could have it all, he was getting cold feet. You didn’t know why, but you knew that it wasn’t your fault, and it certainly wasn’t in your power to lay out all the reasons as to why he shouldn’t feel this way.

He just wasn’t ready.

“You’re going back to the NYPD, right?”

“Yeah. Tomorrow already, as a matter of fact. I have things to take care of.” He scratched his head in nervousness. “You’ll be okay?”

Oddly, you could affirm his assumption.

You’d return to Seoul and to the Korea National Ballet. If you’d had a talk with the academy, you were positive that you could also still join the Dutch National Ballet as originally planned. You had your old life back, and it would all fall into place.

Your future, everything you had worked so hard for, laid in front of you again.

And without Jaehyun. 

Again.

“I’ll be okay.” Despite these insights, you smiled through your pain. “Really.”

“Okay.” Jaehyun’s smile was equally painful. 

Perhaps, he had wished for another outcome as well. But whatever was holding him back was more powerful than everything he’d ever felt for you, and you wished that you could share his pain again, telling him that he didn’t need to go through this all alone.

But you knew, this time, he wouldn’t let you.

Rosie was there for you after he had long left, comforting you throughout the entire night. She was also there when you got discharged two weeks later, bidding you farewell at the airport and showering you with so much love a friend could possibly feel for another. 

“We’re going to meet again,” you promised her.

“I’ll come visit you,” she promised you too.

And with that, you returned to your old life.

____

The curtain call was your favorite part of each performance. Then, all the burden and pressure fell from your shoulders and you could finally breathe again, showering in the spotlight and relishing the applause.

Today was the first time that you stood on the stage of the Korea National Ballet again after the events in the States and thus, your first curtain call after such a long time.

Your hair had returned to its natural color, and despite the fact that you hadn’t changed at all from the outside, you knew that on the inside, you were an entirely different person. Nothing would be like before ever again.

“Good performance,” your instructor remarked and moved on to tell the same to the others as well.

You hadn’t danced an important position, only moving in the background as your instructor had been sure that you had let things slide in the months you were away. Before, you would have gotten angry, practicing day and night to lose the remaining weight and catch up with the others. Yes, you surely had let things slide, but to you, nothing of this was important anymore.

The Dutch National Ballet hadn’t wanted you back, and you couldn’t hold it against them. You were glad to have been able to pick up some kind of engagement again. Until you were back at the top, a lot of time would pass.

You just weren’t so sure anymore if you wanted to climb up that high again.

You took off your tight shoes in the dressing room and rubbed your wounded feet, your thoughts drifting off. You had seen him again. In the audience, sitting in the first row and watching you. Usually, you didn’t let your eyes wander through the people, but this time, your role had given you enough time to do so.

Not your stalker, but Jaehyun.

He had sat there, in a black tuxedo, and had watched you with the same gaze that he would share only with you during your time together.

You knew immediately that this wasn’t real. He wasn’t here. He couldn’t be here. 

Because lately, you saw and felt him very often. Next to you on the bed when you were waking up, walking close to you as you strolled through the streets, and in the mirror whenever you lifted your head after washing your face. 

This was what it was like when you couldn’t let go of a person you had once loved so much.

“There is someone waiting for you in the lobby,” another dancer told you in passing.

“Who is it?” 

“Said his name was Yuno.” She shrugged. “Wears a black tuxedo and waits by the stairs.”

“Okay.”

You didn’t know a person named Yuno, so you didn’t hurry changing your clothes and took your sweet time, until a sudden thought crossed your mind. This was how it had started out with your stalker as well! 

But it couldn’t be. He wasn’t alive anymore, and here, nobody would give you the same attention as you were only a background dancer. You sucked in a rush of air, halted, and then continued your way.

You’d be fine.

Just as you had promised Jaehyun.

“Mister…” you called out when you came around the corner. You didn’t know his surname, so you faltered, only able to watch him from behind as he stood with his back to you.

“Jeong. Mister Jeong.”

“... Mister...”

Your voice was stable, in contrast to your inner feelings as a storm broke free deep within you. You hadn’t seen him in so long, and you wanted to cry, scream and slap him all at once.

“I saw your performance.” He smiled. “You’re marvelous. I wanted to bring you a bouquet of flowers, but thought it would be a bit too tactless…”

“You’re late,” you interrupted him.

“I know,” he agreed. “There were a few things I had to take care of.”

“Things that took you three months?” You folded your arms across your chest. “I thought… I thought you moved on.”

“Is that what you think of me?” He looked hurt. “Have you moved on?”

Not a single bit. Every night, you lived through every moment you had spent together in the States. As much as you had wanted to, you hadn’t been able to move on.

Almost unnoticeably, you shook your head.

“You want to know what I did during this time?” He stepped closer to you as the lobby was emptying, and you didn’t retreat. “I visited the ballerina. She’s doing well. She’s a counselor now, helping people who are as handicapped as her. She said it’s fulfilling and that she’s very happy, and she thanked me again for saving her life. Hearing it from her personally takes a huge burden off my heart.”

Despite your controversial feelings, you smiled. “That’s good to hear. I’m happy for you.”

“And I finished my therapy sessions,” he continued. “For a long time, I thought I was the person bringing harm to people. I’m a detective, why am I only bringing harm to people I desperately want to protect? It just didn’t get into my head. My therapist said that not everyone is made for this life and I should focus on finding a partner who is as equally courageous and fearless as me. Who shares my views on life, who doesn’t back down and looks danger right into the eye. Only then, when I have a partner who can take care of themselves, I don’t have to fear for two lives, but only for one. For mine, because my partner will be fine by themselves.”

Then, he smiled too as you recalled, “I slapped the hell out of that asshole.”

“Yeah, you did. You also defied all my orders. You always know how to take care of yourself. You don’t run away when it’s getting dangerous. And you didn’t hesitate even for a single second when you found out that I lied that day. You came back right away to help me. If there is a woman suitable for me, then it’s you.”

You chewed on the inner flesh of your mouth to keep the growing smile from showing. You still didn’t know what exactly this all meant, but you were eager to hear it from him soon.

“But I didn’t come here to tell you this only.”

You tilted your head. “What did you come here for then?”

“I came to pick up my wife,” was his answer that nearly made your heart jump out of your chest.

You stared at him, lost for words and mouth agape.

“I’m sorry that it took me so long. I wanted to get everything cleared and settled. I wanted to be emotionally ready for a new path in my life, with you by my side. I… I mean… If you hate New York and want to stay in Seoul instead,” he hemmed and hawed, “I would be happy to cross the ocean again as long as you’ll be waiting for me at the other side. But if you want to come back to the US, I’ll be fine with that as well. In Seoul, New York or Connecticut… I can call any place my home as long as you’re with me. This time, as my real wife.”

You felt tears gathering in the brims of your eyes. “As… as your wife?”

“As my wife.” He nodded. “You want me to repeat that again?”

“Yes, please.” You blinked, your shoulders starting to tremble.

“Perhaps, you rather want to read it,” he dismissed softly and reached into the inner pocket of his tuxedo to pull out a sheet that he carefully unfolded and handed over to you.

You read attentively.

MARRIAGE CERTIFICATE APPLICATION

of

Jeong Yuno

and

….

There it was. His real name. Your real name. 

This was real.

You looked up to him, the tears now streaming down your face, and you desperately tried to dry them with the back of your hand.

“If we get all your papers together, we can apply tomorrow and be officially married by next week.”

You could barely see through the blurry curtain of tears. 

“This time, for real?” 

you asked as Yuno, as his real name was, took your hands into his, and it felt just like the first time when you had walked along the streets of the little countryside village.

“This time, for real,” he promised.

#jaehyun #jeong jaehyun #jaehyun imagines #jaehyun scenarios #jaehyun smut #jaehyun x reader #jaehyun x you #nct imagines #nct scenarios #nct smut #nct x you #nct x reader #kpop scenarios #kpop imagines #kpop x reader #kpop x you

[canirove]

My neighbour Rúben | Chapter 1

Summary: Have you ever watched this movie Scarlett Johansson and Chris Evans did before Marvel called “The Nanny Diaries”? It's about a girl, Scarlett's character, who finds herself working as a nanny for a very rich family, and Chris happens to be her hot and very cute neighbour. And something very similar is what has happened to me, neighbour included. Though in my case, mine is very cute and very hot. And handsome. The most handsome man I have ever seen. And his name is Rúben.

Author's note: This story has been finished and waiting in my drafts since 2022. I wrote it as a new and different version of "The Nanny Diaries" (my story with Ben Chilwell) because I didn't like it, and then I ended not liking this one either 🙈 But time passed, I read it again recently, thought it was cute… And here we are, having now both of them posted when they weren't supposed to 😅 I hope you like it, and as always, thank you for reading! 💜

Next chapter

Masterlist

Have you ever watched this movie Scarlett Johansson and Chris Evans did before Marvel called “The Nanny Diaries”? It's about a girl, Scarlett's character, who finds herself working as a nanny for a very rich family with a spoiled kid and Chris is her hot and very cute neighbour. And something very similar is what has happened to me, but let's start from the beginning.

My entire life was designed to achieve one goal: become the best piano player in the country. Or in the continent if my father got too excited. And since I can remember, I've been glued to one.

While my friends were going out to the park, I was going to my teacher's house to practice. While my friends were meeting to go shopping or watch a movie at the cinema, I was practicing. While my friends were going out clubbing and meeting boys and girls, I was going early to bed because I had practice in the morning. And while my friends were choosing a career path they liked and enjoyed and moving to different cities all around the country, I only had one option: playing the piano and moving to Manchester, where the best teacher lived. 

The weather sucks, yes. But it isn't such an ugly city as they say, and all the people I met were lovely and very welcoming. Unless you are fighting with them for a spot on the next recital or to get the next scholarship. That's when things get nasty, and that's how you end up with broken fingers and the dreams your parents had for you shattered. Because becoming the best piano player of my generation wasn't my dream, it was theirs. Or my father’s to be precise.

So when Anastasia Hamilton pushed me down the stairs and I found myself with two broken fingers on my left hand, a sprained ankle and my body covered in bruises, I didn't complain. Well, that's a lie. I complained and cried because it hurt like hell. But I didn't complain when they told me I wouldn't be able to play the piano like I used to due to one of my fingers not healing properly despite being treated by the best doctors. I didn't complain because I was finally free. If I wanted to play, I would be doing it because I wanted to, not because it was my job, because I had to, because my future depended on it. Now I was free to finally follow my dreams and not my parents’. Or that's what I thought.

I told them I wanted to take a gap year to figure out what to do with my life, but they said no. They had decided that I should study to become a music teacher, to help others achieve what I hadn't been able to. We argued, they said that if I wanted to do anything different it would not be with their money, I said ok, and I found myself alone in Manchester with barely any money or a place to live.

And that's when I crossed paths with Julia. 

I had gone to the shopping centre to see if anyone was looking for a waitress or someone to fold t-shirts in a shop, when I saw her crying in the middle of one of the corridors, most people walking past her and ignoring her. 

"Hey, are you ok?" I said, kneeling in front of her. "Where are your parents?"

"Quiero a mi mamá" she sobbed. That was why people were ignoring her. She only spoke Spanish and they didn't understand her. But, lucky me, I used to go to the north of Spain for music summer camp and I can speak it fluently. 

"¿Dónde está tu mamá?" Where is your mum? 

"No lo sé. Estaba comprando una taza fea y..." Her mum was buying an ugly mug. I couldn't help but laugh at that.

"Ok, let’s go find her.” Where we were most shops only sold clothes, but I remembered I had just walked past a Zara Home. Maybe she was there? "Come" I said, grabbing her hand. She didn't say a word and just followed me, her sobs turning into hiccups. 

"Julia!" a woman screamed the moment we turned the corner. "Oh, Julia, I thought I had lost you!" 

"Mami!" the kid said, letting go of my hand and throwing herself at the woman. "Me perdí y esta chica me ayudó."

"Did you help her?" the woman asked me.

"I saw her crying and that people were ignoring her, and I decided to check on her. She was speaking Spanish and I think that's why most people were walking past her, because they weren't able to understand her."

"Oh, she always does that when she gets upset. Do you speak Spanish?"

"Yup."

"Oh, you are an angel" the woman said, hugging her daughter a bit tighter. "I don't know how I'm gonna be able to thank you."

"Knowing that she's alright is enough, don’t worry."

"No, no, no. You must allow me to do something for you. What do you say, Julia. Should we invite this wonderful angel to have lunch with us?"

"Yes!" Julia said, her English coming back. "We'll bake you a chocolate cake! Do you like chocolate cake?"

"I actually do, yes" I smiled.

"Then it's settled. Let me give you my card, it has my office phone number on it" Julia's mum said, opening her bag. "Call tomorrow morning and we'll schedule that lunch together."

"Ok. Thank you."

"Thank you" the woman said, giving me a hug. "My name us Lucía, by the way. But you can call me Lucy like everyone in this country does."

"Nice to meet you, Lucy."

Lucía, Lucy. A Spanish lawyer specialized in divorces, and the divorces of very wealthy people. Which meant that when I arrived at her house for that lunch date, I found myself before one of the most expensive apartment buildings in the city. 

"Are you coming in, miss?" the doorman asked.

"Yes, hi, sorry. Do I have to tell you where I'm going or..."

"You don't look like a thief" the man chuckled.

"I'm not, I promise. I'm meeting with Lucy and Julia."

"Oh, yes. Miss Julia said a friend was coming for lunch today. An angel."

"That must be me" I said, blushing a bit.

"Then welcome, miss" the man said, opening the building's door. "Do you know their floor number?"

"Yes, the 7th. Letter B."

"That’s the one. Call for the lift and push the number, their house will be the one to your right."

"Thank you very much, sir."

"My pleasure, miss" the man said with a smile. Roger. The loveliest man you'll ever meet.

"So glad you could make it" Lucy said after opening the door, giving me a hug. 

"Angel!" Julia screamed, coming to also hug me. "You came!"

"Of course I did."

"She’s decided to start calling you angel because of what I said at the shopping centre. I hope you don’t mind.”

“It’s fine, don’t worry" I smiled.

“Come, let me show you my room" Julia said, grabbing my hand and forcing me to follow her.

After a tour around the house and its many rooms, we were back in the living room, one where the small flat I was renting thanks to some money my grandparents had been sending me without my parents knowing, could perfectly fit.

"Is that a real piano?" I asked Julia.

"It's daddy's" she said. "We used to play together."

"That's lovely." My dad never played with me just for fun. It always was about practice, practice... And oh, yes, more practice.

"Do you play?" Lucy asked me.

"Since I was Julia's age."

"Oh, that's wonderful! Why don't you play something for us while we wait for our food?"

"Sure" I said, sitting in front of the huge black piano. It was a very expensive one like everything else on that building.

"Daddy used to play that!" Julia said when she recognized the song. "Hey Jude, don't make it bad... Mami, why are you crying?" she asked her when we finished.

"Because it was beautiful, sweetheart. And you play so well" Lucy told me. "Have you ever thought about giving lessons?"

"Not really..."

"Julia started to take them a few months ago, but her teacher... Had other things to do, so now she doesn't have one. Would you like to take her place?"

"Me?" 

"Yes, angel! Be my teacher!" Julia said, clapping her hands and jumping.

That was what my parents had wanted me to do. To become a teacher. I wasn't going to be doing it at the music school, but this still was teaching, right? And I liked Lucy and Julia a lot despite only knowing them for just a few hours. 

"I'll do it" I said. "I'll be Julia's teacher."

"Oh, perfect!" Lucy smiled. "When can you start?"

"Whenever you want. I have nothing else to do" I shrugged.

"Then tomorrow. I have to work, so maybe you could pick up Julia from school, bring her here and start your lessons? I'll pay you for that extra time."

"Ok" I nodded.

I had found a job, one that I liked, and one that was going to pay me handsomely judging by the numbers Lucy had mentioned while doing a draft of my contract. 

I was so busy thinking about all that, checking the details she had given me about Julia's school, that I hadn’t noticed the lift had made it to the lobby and the doors were open. 

“Are you going up again?” a male voice said.

“Uh?” I replied, lifting my eyes from my phone. And what did they see? The most handsome man you could ever imagine.

“Are you going up again?” he repeated.

“I…” I had forgotten how to speak. I may have not been wearing an ugly costume like Scarlett in one of the scenes where she met Chris Evans, but I had my jaw on the floor and definitely was making a fool of myself. “No” I finally managed to say.

“So… are you leaving, then?” he asked, trying to hide a smile.

“Yes” I said, still looking at him. Was he real? He was real. When he stopped the lift’s door from closing again, taking a step forward towards me, I saw that he was very real. “Thank you. Sorry. I’m leaving” I blurted out, my brain finally remembering how speaking worked. Kind of.

“It’s ok” he replied with a smile. No, not a smile. A smirk. One that made everything inside me turn upside down. “Bye” he said, walking inside the lift and letting go of the doors, disappearing behind them while I just stared. He must have thought I was stupid. A creep. Or both. But what else are you supposed to do when you find yourself face to face with the hottest man in planet earth?

“Miss, are you alright?” I heard Roger say from the door.

“Yes, yes. Just… Processing what just happened. That I got a job, I mean” I quickly added, noticing how he was arching an eyebrow, his eyes moving to the lift. 

“Oh, those are great news, miss. Congratulations.”

“Thank you. I guess you’ll be seeing more of me from now on.”

And hopefully, I would be seeing more of him too. Of the hot neighbour, my own Chris Evans. Though later on I would find out that his name wasn’t Chris, that would have been too much of a coincidence.

His name was Rúben. 

#ruben dias #ruben dias fanfic #ruben dias imagine #football fanfic #football imagine

[meazalykov]

redirection I

esmee brugts x barcaplayer!R

last chapter: redirection; prologue

next chapter: redirection II

It's been a few days since i’ve arrived in Barcelona. Sometimes my mind goes blank when I process that this is my life now. Don’t get me wrong, I am excited and this is what I've always wanted, but moving continents by myself at the age of nineteen is a big adjustment.  

My mother, m/n , and my older sister, s/n , came here with me for a week to make sure I am adjusted into my club, my new apartment and life. 

Currently, I am at Ciutat Esportiva with my mom and sister. They stood behind the barcelona media team member, Sarah, who started to record my Juggling skills for the fcbfemeni instagram. A poster with myself was in the background of the recording, this is the traditional way of welcoming new Barcelona players onto the team.

(the poster behind you, y/n, during your first media day shoot is yourself doing the pose that joão félix is doing in this picture above^ with your other hand pointing to the badge!) 

Thankfully I didn't lose the ball while the media admin, Sarah, was recording or that would’ve been embarrassing. I tapped the ball high enough where I could catch it with my hands after the recording ended. Sarah instructed my mom and sister to come beside me to take pictures, as it was nearly time to wrap up the first media day I've completed for the club. 

I had on the 23/24 Barcelona kit with my all white Nike cleats. I didn’t have a number yet so the kit I'm wearing is numberless, but that is totally okay and expected. My mother wore a green maxi long sleeve dress and my sister wore jeans with a lavender cardigan. I couldn’t see their faces but I knew we were all smiling in the picture. Signing for this beautiful club is a dream come true. 

My father and other sister couldn’t come to Spain with me but they did say their good luck and goodbyes. My father is a college basketball coach and my sister, s/n l/n, is a d1 basketball player at another college and couldn’t spend a week away from her life back home.

The media shoot and signings this morning were all complete. Officially, I am a Barcelona Player and everyone is aware of it. I had to stay back at Ciutat after saying goodbye to my sister and mother, who left to go back to America, since I am about to meet my new teammates who are arriving for practice. 

My emotions were all over the place. My stomach felt empty and I continued to smile as a response to my nervousness. Meeting new people came with my career but I am a shy person. Would they like me as a person? What if the language barrier is a problem for a few teammates? A million questions ran through my head as I followed the sporting director and Sarah down a set of stairs and down a hallway I haven’t walked through yet. 

As we turned the corner, the talking and laughing coming from girls echoed down the hallway from the room at the end of the hallway. I took a deep breath, preparing myself for meeting my new teammates. 

Most of my new teammates are Spanish, meaning that the ones from their national team won the World Cup a few weeks ago. I remember being happy for them since this is the first time Spain’s women's team reached this accomplishment. 

Stepping into the room, I immediately noticed all of the girls putting on their cleats or playing around with their water bottles. This made me smile. Their laughter filled the air, mingled with the sound of cleats hitting the floor and random clapping coming from a young girl with brown curly hair. 

Alexia Putellas, the captain of the team and the best player in the world, noticed the entrance of y/n l/n first and smiled brightly. y/n smiled back in admiration for the leader. She knew that these were the faces she would be spending countless hours with on the field, striving together towards victory. Y/n had a hesitant smile as she stepped into the locker room more, ready to introduce herself.

“Hey girls! We have the last new player for the team, meet Y/n!” Sarah grabbed the team’s attention with excitement in her voice. 

All of the girls started to walk forwards towards me with smiles. The first woman, the one who had a locker close to the door, stood up and gave me a hug. I didn’t expect it so my hug back was a little awkward, but I don't think she noticed. 

“Hi, I'm Ingrid. It’s so nice to finally meet you!” Ingrid’s bright smile showed as she pulled back from the hug. I felt comforted by her almost immediately, if I had to guess, she's probably the mother or older sister of the team. 

“Hi, I'm y/n!” I said with excitement in my voice. 

“Oh we know who you are! It's so nice to meet you! I’m Aitana!” Aitana’s strong catalan accent was present as she spoke. I smiled brightly and a light blush showed on my face as she gave me a hug.

After meeting and talking to most people on the team. We all striked up a conversation about the upcoming season, what our goals are, other things we are interested in outside of football, and some teammates even offered to take me around Barcelona to get used to the city. I can’t wait to play with these lovely girls.

As I looked around the locker room, I caught the gaze of a girl. She had two dutch braids and had nice brown eyes. She sat across the room and seemed to be watching me…. with admiration? No that can’t be. She smiled at me lightly and I smiled at her back since she is the only girl I haven’t met yet.

Bruna, who's sitting beside the girl I'm smiling at, saw us and playfully nudged the girl’s shoulder, prompting her to approach me. With a shy smile, the girl stood up from her bench and stepped forward, this made me… nervous? The girl had an adorable smile and shes attract- 

“Cut it out! You just got here and already found a potential crush? Maybe get to know her first..? Or maybe focus on getting used to playing in Barcelona before starting potential relationships!” 

I criticize myself in my head. 

“Hiii, I’m Esmee. It's nice to meet you.” The girl, who I know as Esmee now, embraced me into a hug. She had a unique accent. Dutch? She was soft spoken and it comforted me more after getting along with the team. 

I hugged her back and almost realized how tight we held each other. However, that was overshadowed by some observing teammates that looked at us, while others exchanged knowing glances. Their expressions hinted at a deeper understanding of Esmee and I’s introduction. I know that they’ve met me today so I have to catch up on the inside jokes among the team, but did they notice something I didn't notice? 

"Hiii, I'm y/n! It's nice to meet you too Esmee." I blushed as I kept my hand on her right shoulder when we backed from the hug. I looked over at Ona Batlle to see her smiling at Esmee and I.

"Are you going to train with us today? You probably just finished your first day doing media things." Esmee smiled as she observed the playing kit I am still wearing. All of the other girls have their grey training kits on, so I stood out from the group.

"I am! I still have to change from this then I'll meet you guys on the pitch." I said nervously, afraid that I am wasting time from the girl's getting out on the field to train. I think Esmee noticed my nervousness as she lightly giggled.

"There's no worries. I did my first day stuff on Tuesday. I'm coming from PSV Eindhoven." Esmee said as I headed over to my assigned locker, where my grey training kit still laid.

Before the pictures started this morning for my signing, the sporting director showed me around campus so I wouldn't get lost. I had my assigned locker and everything I needed. I met Jona, my new coach, as well. He is a nice guy and he appreciated my skills as a striker. Sometimes having a coach can make or break your motivation in the sport, so knowing that my new coach is nice gave me relief.

"PSV Eindhoven that's so cool!" I say. I have a lot of knowledge with football clubs so I knew exactly which club that is.

"I'm coming from Washington Spirit." I continue. Esmee nods her head as I pick up my grey training kit and sit down in the seat between Salma and Mariona.

"Washington Spirit! Is that in Washington?" Keira's english accent spoke up. She looked up at me as she was tying her cleats.

"Yes it is!" I smile, believing that she is referring to Washington DC.

"That's so cool! You know, I went to Seattle one time-" Keira was cut off by everyone's laughter. She was confused as she saw me shook my head with a smile.

"Seattle is in Washington State. Washington Spirit is in Washington DC." I say. Everyone in the dressing room continues to laugh as Keira jokingly taps herself on the head.

2.5 hours later

The first day of training was a success. Nothing in this training was anything I wasn't familiar with, but the mentally is different. Everyone takes things a little more seriously here than back in Washington DC. However, I'm not complaining. I like it.

I wore the long sleeve grey training kit with the grey shorts today during training. I wasn't used to wearing another club's kits yet, so this new look was exciting to me.

After I put on the outfit that I originally came to Ciutat Esportiva with (photo with above), I grabbed my nike sports bag before seeing Esmee walk out of the dressing room at the same time as me.

I wasn't distracted at training by her, but I did look at her a few more times than what is necessary. I think Bruna noticed, as she stood beside me and smirked at me when I watched Esmee do some juggling.

Before Bruna left the dressing room around 5 minutes ago, I saw her mention something to Esmee. The dutch woman looked surprised, had a smirk on her face, then had a look of denial before Bruna left for the day.

"Hey." I said as I walked beside Esmee on the way out of campus.

"Hey!" Esmee smiled brightly as she looked back at me. That smile of hers is adorable, I don't think it will leave my mind.

"It's nice knowing someone who's starting their first season at the same time as me. I've never transferred clubs before so this is all new to me." I spoke as Esmee and I continued to walk where the parking lot is outside of Ciutat.

"It is nice. I saw 433 post your transfer announcement on instagram and I followed you, it's a relief to know I'm not the only one going through this." Esmee agreed with me. I have to remember to follow her back on instagram when I get home soon.

We both walked in silence as we headed out to the parking lot. The silence wasn't awkward at all as the sounds of cars driving by with the wind filled our ears.

"Are you doing anything later?" Esmee spoke up before I started to turn from the opposite direction from her, planning to walk to the rental car I have until I can buy a car of my own.

"No not much." I said. I didn't know much about Barcelona, so I just planned to eat by myself at some touristy restaurant later before spending the rest of the night watching Netflix documentaries.

"Do you want to go out to eat later? Ingrid and Mapi recommended me a few places when I met them on Tuesday. It'd be nice to have a friend here in Barcelona to go with." Esmee spoke.

I smiled as I nodded my head at her request. Having a friend here In Barcelona would be nice. Going out to eat by myself later wouldn't be as fun.

"Yes!" I said as I walked over to Esmee. She pulled her phone out of her back pocket and pulled up the phone keypad.

"Just put your phone number in so I can text you. We can decide which restaurant and timing is best." Esmee spoke with her normal soft spoken voice. I typed in my number and listed my contact as "y/n :)" before giving her the phone back.

"That's great! See you later Esmee." I smiled as a I walked away to the car.

next chapter: redirection II

:)

#esmee brugts #oranjeleeuwinnen #woso x reader #woso fanfics #barcelona femeni #fc barcelona

[tolstayas]

there's a sense of foreignness, a haunting awareness of the immigrant and third culture experience, that's everywhere in mitski's music. it's the awareness that moving changes you; that where you are is who you are. it's in 'brand new city', with its dream of becoming a new person by moving to a new place. it's in 'texas reznikoff', the love song of someone who's never found even just one continent to settle down on: "but i've been anywhere, and it's not what i want, i want to be still with you". it's in 'your best american girl' - obviously. it's in the story behind 'nobody', going back to malaysia where she'd lived as a child and finding that she might as well be an alien - perhaps from the "planet of love" - and certainly had no home where she was. it's in dying on a plane in 'last words of a shooting star', a soul passing by with no grave on earth to return to. it's in the sound of a train pulling away in 'happy', echoed again in 'buffalo replaced': love always leaves by literally going somewhere else. it's in "the city where you're from" in 'blue diner' because every old friend and lover has their (physical) place in her life. it's in the americana, the liberty bell, cowboys, laurel hell, buffalo - and the lines in japanese in 'first love / late spring'. it's in the love that has "traveled very far" in 'star'. it's being the "king of all the land" while belonging to no part of it in 'i love me after you'. and this is ultimately how i interpret 'the land is inhospitable and so are we': it's an autobiogeography. the land may have no place for us, but it defines us anyway. after all, where you are is who you are.

#ramblings #mitski #the land is inhospitable and so are we #i haven't read all the info on the album yet these r just my thoughts from listening to it yesterday!

[thenerdykneazle]

Slytherin Green

Summary: Sebastian is none too pleased to discover you've borrowed Garreth's jumper after his experimental potion ruined your usual uniform. Your duelling practice threatens to turn into a falling out.

Seb's POV

Sebastian Sallow x Ravenclaw F!MC

Warnings: 18+, explicit sexual content, 7th year, aged-up characters, jealousy, CMNF, Seb being toxic

Word count: 5129

Sebastian owed you the world. He would be rotting in Azkaban if it wasn’t for you. He’d spent all of sixth year trying to earn the second chance you’d given him. He helped you on every new mission to root out the last of the Ashwinders or chase off poachers. He helped you with homework. He practically followed you around like a lost puppy, or so Imelda would say. But he couldn’t help if he wanted to be around you all the time.

He'd grown to have quite the crush on you. Not that he’d ever admit it. He didn’t want you to think everything he did for you was a ploy for your affections. Besides, he knew how you felt about him. He’d find you slumped against Ominis as you both napped against a wall. He saw how you’d ruffle Garreth’s hair when you teased him. You gave Natty and Poppy hugs constantly. Even Imelda would get a punch to the arm or a squeeze of her cheeks, much to her dismay. But you never touched him. Not on purpose, anyway.

There was the odd brush of a hand as you trekked through the forest or press of your sides together while hiding from dark wizards or dangerous beasts. But, unlike the rest of your friends, you seemed averse to touch him. He’d dream about it being different sometimes. The heat of your hands sinking into his arms as he tangled your hair around his fingers. Your hot mouth on his neck. The warmth of your body flush against his.

There was a chill that had sunk into his bones ever since he used that damned relic. He felt certain you could warm him in a way blankets, cloaks, and the common room fire always failed. Their heat couldn’t reach deep enough. But you. You would seep into his very soul. He was sure of it.

He wondered if you could feel the chill. If that was what made you loathe to touch him. He worried further if you were simply repulsed by him – by the things you now knew him to be capable of. Maybe you only kept him close to ensure he didn’t slip back into dark magic.

He knew any further misdeeds of his would weigh on your conscience. You would blame yourself for letting him walk free. So, he was determined to ensure that you didn’t regret your choice. He hadn’t even touched a dark tome since the end of fifth year. Not just for you. He’d realized how much he almost lost due to the seductive forces of malevolent magic and decided to stop before he made even worse mistakes. That didn’t mean he’d given up on curing Anne, of course. He was searching for any sort of unusual medicine that might help her. He’d written healers across the continent about her symptoms to see if they had any ideas. So far, he hadn’t had any luck, but he held out hope.

You helped him, too. You spent every spare moment sat across from him at a library table, reading old healer manuals and texts on curse breaking. You’d even gotten Professor Weasley to help tutor you on the latter subject. Sebastian would’ve felt guilty if he didn’t love spending the time with you so much. He cherished every moment spent with you, partly because he feared that, at any moment, you might cut him out – that his sins would catch up with him, and you’d abandon him.

He couldn’t take the thought of not having you in his life. He was paranoid about someone stealing you away. As he entered potions class, he was faced with one of the many things that made him nervous about the prospect.

You were already at your station, which you shared with Garreth.

That day, you were revising brewing veritaserum before you would learn to make the antidote next class. Sebastian didn’t like the mischievous look on the ginger’s face as he whispered to you.

You just rolled your eyes at him.

“Good morning, Sebastian!” you said with a bright smile when you noticed him.

“Hello, MC,” he replied, returning your grin. “Still on for some duelling practice this evening?”

“Wouldn’t miss it!” you vowed.

He beamed at you. “Brilliant! Meet you after dinner, then?”

“Yeah, sounds like a plan,” you replied.

Sebastian’s gaze flicked over to your tablemate. His smile vanished. “Weasley.”

“Sallow,” the gregarious Gryffindor replied coolly.

The lesson was torture. Despite having learned the potion the previous year, Sebastian almost mucked it up three separate times. He even almost used a fwooper feather instead of jobberknoll. He kept getting distracted looking over at your station. Garreth kept leaning over and whispering to you, and you kept giggling in response. Smarmy git should focus on his studies more, Sebastian thought.

Suddenly, a cyan plume of steam rose from Garreth’s cauldron, forming a cloud overhead. Blue slime began raining down on your whole station. You shrieked.

“Whoops! That wasn’t supposed to happen!” Garreth said as he stared curiously at his cauldron.

Sharp quickly vanished the sludge from the cauldron, but the cloud kept growing. “Everyone out!” he growled before looking pointedly at Garreth and MC. “Except you two.”

The professor sounded exasperated. Sebastian was taken out in the current of fleeing students. As he left, he could see Sharp casting several spells at the cloud in vain. He could also see you were splattered in blue goo.

“I don’t know why Sharp is punishing you for Garreth’s idiocy,” Sebastian groused as you both walked from the Great Hall to the Undercroft. You were goo-free now, fortunately.

“Well, I did dare him to brew it,” you admitted.

Sebastian rolled his eyes. “You really shouldn’t encourage him. He’s a hazard.”

You shrugged. “It was so boring, though. It’s worth the detention.”

Sebastian frowned harder at the thought of you and Garreth sat together in detention.  “What time is that again?” he asked.

You sighed. “Eight,” you replied before stepping into the old clock.

Sebastian followed close behind you. “I’ll have to make quick work of you, then,” he teased.

You sent him a scandalized glance over your shoulder. “Merlin, that sounds a bit rude, doesn’t it?” you replied.

“You know I didn’t mean it like that!” he said in an exasperated tone, but his cheeks coloured, nonetheless. He hoped it was too dark for you to tell. “Besides, I’m not falling for your innocent Ravenclaw act.”

You spun on your heel and batted your lashes affectedly at him. It still made his heart race. “I’m afraid I have no idea what you’re talking about,” you said innocently before shooting him a sarcastic smile. “Now are you going to keep prattling on or ‘make quick work of me’?”

Sebastian’s voice caught in his throat as a string of lewd images flashed through his mind – mostly of you on top of or bent over the desk you were walking towards. His ears were burning as you smirked at him.

“Snake got your tongue?” you asked, amused.

Sebastian cleared his throat. “No,” he said lamely as he unhooked his robes. He draped them over a crate.

You shed your own robe, as well, tossing it over the chair as you always did. You began rolling your oversized sleeves up past your elbows.

Sebastian saw red, literally and figuratively. “What the fuck is that?” he hissed.

You looked down at the crimson jumper and then back up at him. “What?” you said brusquely. “My shirt was stained from the goo, so Garreth lent me his jumper. So, no fire spells today, please and thank you.”

Sebastian’s jaw tensed. “That looks absolutely ridiculous,” he said harshly.

You shrugged. “Better than looking like I have doxy sick all over me,” you argued. “Now stop being so childish. It’s not like I’ve switched houses. It’s just a jumper.”

“People exchange scarves when they’re courting,” he said. “You look like you’ve gone off and shagged him in a broom cupboard!”

“Go fuck yourself, Sebastian,” you replied acerbically. He could tell you were more upset than you were letting on. Your shoulders were tight, and your jaw was clenched. There was a fire smouldering in your eyes. He was surprised you hadn’t–

With a quick flick of your wand, you sent a nonverbal blasting curse at him. It hit him in the shoulder, leaving a large but minor burn. Your nonverbal spells were always weaker. “Ow!” he whinged. “That’s hardly sporting!”

“Well, you’re an arsehole. You don’t deserve me being sporting,” you bit back.

“Have it your way,” he growled before send a slew of spells in your direction.

You blocked the first three and dodged out of the way of the last one, which was a blasting curse of his own. “Oi! I said no fire!” you barked, glancing down to check for scorch marks.

Sebastian glared at you. “Oh, yes, I’d hate for your little keepsake to be damaged!”

He sent two more blasting curses at you. You dove, rolling out of their path. When you got back to your feet, you started your counterattack with a stunner. “You. Are. So. Frustrating!”

You punctuated every word with a basic cast.

“I’m frustrating?” he bellowed. His eyes darkened as he prowled in a circle around you, poised to strike the instant your arm twitched. “You are the most infuriating witch I’ve ever met!”

You rolled your eyes. You pivoted to stay facing him as he stalked around you. “You’re the one upset about a bloody jumper!”

“Well, you’re the one acting like it belongs in the deepest vault at Gringotts,” he shot back.

You scoffed. “What do you even care?”

He cared that it was Garreth sodding Weasley’s jumper and as red as his stupid hair.

He cared that you were acting like some moon-eyed, besotted little girl.

He cared that, while you wouldn’t even touch him, you were pleased as punch to be wearing another man’s clothes.

“I don’t care,” he asserted, losing most of his venom as he aimed for nonchalance. “It’s just…embarrassing.”

“Well, if I’m so embarrassing–” you started, hurling an exploding charm at him. He dodged it, and it blew apart a crate, instead. “–then you don’t need to be seen with me.”

You hit him with a banishing charm he was too stunned to dodge. He flew back into a large stack of old books, scattering them all over the floor. “What are you saying?” he asked as he scrambled back to his feet. Fear had edged into his voice.

“I’m saying you don’t bloody owe me anything!” you fumed amidst sending a flurry of spells at his head. He blocked them all and even sent back some spells of his own. You growled in rage as a severing charm caught your arm. “If you hate me so much, then you can fuck right off! I won’t make you hang around.”

You felt like your shoulder might pop right out with the force you used slashing your wand through the air. Your spells deflected off Sebastian’s shield charm or hit random object across the room as he evaded them. By the time you stopped casting, several small piles of rubble were smouldering and you were panting to catch your breath.

You expected a counterattack, but Sebastian dropped his wand as soon as you stopped.

His whole face had fallen. “I didn’t…I don’t hate you,” he said quietly as he stepped forward through the tattered books and splintered wood. You let your wand arm drop.

“Could’ve fooled me,” you spat as he approached.

“How could you think I hate you? I–” He choked back the words. “I care about you so much.”

You crossed your arms over your chest. “Not more than you hate Gryffindors, apparently,” you said bitterly.

“The only reason I put up with that self-righteous lot is for you!” he said, jabbing a finger into your chest. You took a step back. “You’re the one that can’t seem to stand being around me.”

You rolled your eyes. “How d’you figure that?” you asked, incredulous.

“I’m the only person you keep at arm’s length. You snuggle up to Ominis like you’re a couple of crup puppies. You, Natty, and Poppy are practically conjoined twins. You play with Weasley’s stupid ginger hair all the time – and you’re in his sodding jumper. You’re even touchy with Imelda. And you act like I’d burn you or give you some incurable disease if you got too close.”

“You’re insane! I…I don’t do that,” you said, but your voice faltered.

Sebastian rolled his eyes. “You’re not hiding your little crush from anyone, love,” he bit out, making you blush madly. “It’s rather obvious that you’re smitten with Weasley. But the point is–”

“I don’t have feelings for Garreth,” you interjected.

“Yeah, obviously,” he said sarcastically, giving the hem of the jumper a swift tug.

He pulled harder than he’d meant to, sending you stumbling forward into him. You let out a little gasp as you smacked into his chest. He caught you by the arms to steady you. You hissed in pain, and Sebastian immediately released you. There was blood on his right hand.

“Shit, I’m so sorry!” he said, quickly reaching into his pocket. He took out a phial of green liquid. He pulled the stopper out with his teeth, avoiding using his bloodied hand, and passed it to you.

You took the potion from him gingerly, and he noted how you carefully avoided brushing his fingers. You downed the brew in one gulp. His eyes caught on the column of your neck as you swallowed. He blinked and forced himself to look away.

You returned the empty phial, and he pocketed it. He stepped closer before carefully pulling the cut in your sleeve apart to inspect your skin. It was already mended.

He turned his head to your face, examining you with concern marring his features. “Does it still hurt?”

You stared at him with wide eyes. “Um, no. It’s fine now…thank you,” you said, looking down and taking a step backwards.

Sebastian huffed as you pulled away from him – like you always did. “That is exactly what I’m talking about!”

You furrowed your brow. “What is?”

“You’re constantly putting space between us,” he said. His breath caught as a realization struck him. “Are…are you afraid of me?”

“Afraid of you?” you asked like it was a laughable idea.

He ran his left hand through his hair. “Well, if it’s not that and you don’t hate me, then what is it?” He was clearly exasperated.

You stared up at him, biting your lip anxiously. You let your gaze fall again, landing on his bloody palm. You scourgified his hand for him, since his wand was still lying on the floor amongst the wreckage. He waited out your silence. “I just…” You took a deep breath. “It’s difficult for me to be close to you.”

You glanced up at him. He looked gutted. He stayed rigid, even though what he wanted most was to reach out to you. “But why? What did I do? I’ll fix it, I promise! Just tell me what I did.”

“You didn’t do anything wrong, Seb,” you said, unable to stop the flush from coming to your cheeks. “It’s just hard because it’s not the same with you. I…I like you. And I know you don’t like me. Obviously. But it just hurts to be close to you when it can’t be in the way I want.”

Sebastian blinked rapidly. He looked stunned. “What?” he nearly yelled.

“Please don’t make it a big deal,” you pled. “It’s really not.”

Sebastian was still reeling. “You like me? As in fancy me?”

You just nodded.

In a flash, he had your face in his hands and his lips on yours. He kissed you fiercely, and the warmth of your lips spread through his whole face and down his neck. The heat from your cheeks seeped into his palms. He pulled back before you could even reciprocate. You just gaped at him.

“Why on earth would you think I don’t like you?” he asked, bewildered.

“I heard you telling Isaac Cooper last week that I’m a terrible dancer and he should ask Natty to the Halloween dance, instead,” you said, looking at your shoes.

Sebastian rolled his eyes even as he stroked his thumbs over your cheeks fondly. “Because I didn’t want to watch him spin you around the Great Hall all night or snog you behind the jack-o’-lanterns. Because I can’t stand seeing you with anyone else.”

“You mean you were jealous?” you asked. You gasped. “That’s why you’re so peeved over a silly jumper!”

You were wearing an arrogant smirk now.

Sebastian glared at you. “Obviously, you silly witch,” he said grumpily. “Now take the ruddy thing off! I’m not kissing you again while you’re in it.”

“Is that so?” you asked, raising an eyebrow. “But it’s so cozy. And it smells like butterscotch and sarsaparilla. It’s quite nice, don’t you think?”

You were biting back a smile, but Sebastian wasn’t amused.

His hands dropped from your face. “No, I don’t,” he gritted out. “Off. Now.”

You gave a shocked gasp. “That’s no way to treat a lady, Sebastian!” you teased.

He narrowed his gaze at you. “You can take off the jumper, or I can do it for you,” he said darkly. “But I can’t promise I’ll stop there.”

Your eyes sparked with excitement. “And you’ll overpower me how, exactly?” you asked with a cocky grin. “You don’t even have your wand.”

He fisted a hand into your hair as he leaned in, letting his lips ghost over your ear. “I don’t need it to make you beg,” he replied in a low voice. You’d already admitted how affected you were by him. He was feeling rather confident.

His words shot straight to your core. He leaned back to watch your reaction. You licked your lips as his eyes dragged over you. Grabbing the hem with both hands, he pulled the jumper off over your head. He flung it across the room. You were left in your thin combinations and trousers. Immediately, his lips were back on yours. He held your hips as he backed you toward the desk. His fingers flexed into your curves as he memorized the feel of them.

As your bum hit the desk, his hands slid up your back, leaving a trail of fire. He pressed his body flush against yours, eliminating the remaining space between you, and he gave an involuntary shiver. Holding you was like stepping into a warm home after a hike through a snowy forest. Breaking your kiss, Sebastian dipped his head to press his lips along your collar bone. His tongue darted out, tasting the salt on your skin. A moan escaped your lips, and he smirked against you.

“Shut up,” you grumbled.

“I didn’t say anything, love,” he replied before nipping at your skin.

You breathed in a sharp gasp before he recaptured your lips. He slid his tongue forward, licking into your mouth. He groaned with need as he tasted you, whispers of the tea and chocolate pudding you’d had at dinner meeting his tongue. He’d imagined it on countless nights, but now he had the real thing. Then he felt you smirk.

He brought one of his hands around to your front and palmed your breast through the thin cotton covering it. He could feel your nipple perk up at his touch.

“Sebastian,” you whimpered as you panted for breath.

Much better. He quickly began on the buttons lining the front of your undergarment. “Need something, darling?” he asked as he pulled your top open. He brought his hands to cup under both breasts as he kissed down your sternum. He peppered kiss over each mound, avoiding where you’d be most sensitive.

You were keening continuously. Your hands tangled in his hair. He could feel you trying to guide him gently to where you wanted him.

“You need to say it, love,” he said firmly.

You let out a frustrated whine. “I want you to k-kiss me,” you managed.

Sebastian kissed your lips briefly. “Like that? Or here?” He kissed your shoulder.

You shook your head urgently. Your teeth had sunk deep into your bottom lip. The desperation in your face made Sebastian’s cock jump.

He kissed the inside of your breast, then looked at you expectantly.

You let out a pathetic groan. “Please, Sebastian.”

Your whole face was scarlet, though he wasn’t sure if it was from need or embarrassment.

He took mercy on you and latched onto your nipple, massaging his tongue into it as his hand kneaded your other breast. Your moan echoed through the underground chamber. He worked your clothes off your shoulders as his tongue flicked back and forth over your nipple. Your top half was stripped bare. Sebastian released your breast and leaned back to admire you. He took in every contour with reverent attention. His saliva glistened on your skin, but the sheen was already fading.

Using your purchase in his mane, you pulled Sebastian into another heated kiss. He let you explore his mouth with your tongue as he worked to undo your trousers. He moved down to your shoulder, tracing down the long lines of your neck on the way there. He sucked a dark mark into the top of your shoulder, a much more lasting sign of his presence with you.

Your hands shot down to his shoulders, and your nails dug into his jacket. He slid his own hand into your unbuttoned trousers, slipping underneath your combinations and down to your core. He groaned at how slick it was.

“Fuck,” he hissed. “You feel so fucking good.”

You moaned as his fingers slid through your swollen folds. He found your nub at the apex and stroked over it languidly. Your hands on his shoulders tightened, and your head fell back. Your breathing grew more and more ragged as he switched to quick little circles.

“Oh gods, Sebastian!” you cried.

“That’s it,” he praised. “I want you to come for me, MC. Can you come like this?”

You nodded eagerly as a whine escaped you. Your lip was back trapped between your teeth, and your eyes were screwed shut.

“Look at me,” Sebastian demanded. He wanted to watch you fall apart. Your thighs were trembling, and he suspected you were close.

Your eyes snapped open.

“Good girl,” he said. “Let me see you. See what I do to you.”

“Fuck, Seb! I…I’m…” you tried. You cut yourself off with a cry of pleasure.

Your hips jerked against Sebastian’s hand. Your eyes had glazed over, but you kept them open. You keened and panted as your orgasm flowed through you.

“Thank you. You’re so beautiful,” Sebastian whispered before pressing a kiss to your temple as he slid his hand out of your trousers.

You laughed. “I should be thanking you.”

He gripped your waistband with both hands, hooking his thumbs underneath your combinations, as well. “May I?”

“Gods, yes!” you replied.

He tugged the clothes down your legs, crouching down and helping you step out of them along with your shoes and stockings. He kissed your thigh tenderly on the way back up. As he stood, you began unbuttoning his waistcoat and tugging his shirt out of his trousers.

Just then, your wand started buzzing in your pile of discarded clothes. Your head snapped in its direction. “Fuck! I’ve got to get going,” you said.

Sebastian pinned your hips to the desk with his own. “If you think I’m letting you run off to see Weasley before I’m through with you…”

You rolled your eyes. “It’s detention, not a social call.”

His jaw tensed. “We can do this here, or I can come and fuck you in front of Weasley and Sharp. And I don’t think you want to be expelled, so you’re not leaving until my cum is running down your thighs so that the next time you think of accepting a jumper from Garreth bloody Weasley, you’ll remember the feeling of my cock inside you and your tits in my mouth and think better of how you cover them.”

You were staring up at him with lust-blown eyes. “Merlin, you’re such a prick!” you chided, even as you were undoing his belt. You added under your breath, “It shouldn’t be so hot.”

Sebastian grabbed you under your arse and lifted you onto the edge of the desk. He leaned over you as he gave a punishing kiss, laying you back in the process. Gods, he would snog you for hours if you had the time. As he stood back up, he undid his trousers and pulled himself out of them. He held your thigh with one hand and the base of his cock with the other. He allowed himself to stroke his head through your slick folds a few times before lining himself up at your entrance.

You were propped up on your elbows and staring in awe at where your bodies were about to be joined.

Sebastian pressed forward, sinking into your heat. Finally. It was like sliding into a warm bath after a rough fight. “Merlin, it’s like you were fucking made for me, MC!”

Every thrust into you was pure bliss. Your tits bounced with every rock into you, and Sebastian couldn’t resist bending down to capture one of your nipples in his mouth again. He was pleased with the moans that poured from your lips. The pace of his hips suffered, and he didn’t have the time for it, but he kept sucking on your perfect breast, anyway. And he couldn’t find it in himself to feel sorry about it. It was the first time he got to have you – though, it definitely wouldn’t be the last if he had anything to say about it – and he was going to enjoy it fully, damn it!

He moved to kiss your lips, slipping his tongue back into your mouth to remind himself how you taste. Then, he finally righted himself and focused on the task at hand. With a bruising grip on your hips, he pounded into you over and over. He watched as your body clung to him while he pulled back before disappearing inside once more. All he could think about was filling you up. Marking his territory from the inside out. Because now that he had you, he’d be damned if he let you slip through his fingers. You were finally his – just like he’d been yours since fifth year.

“You feel incredible, Seb!” you moaned, your back arching off the desk as you’d long abandoned propping yourself up.

“I’m gonna make you come again,” he vowed in a strangled voice, making you whimper in anticipation. “That’s it. Be a good girl and come on my cock.”

He released one of your legs, which wrapped around his waist as he thumbed your clit. Your breath hitched. “Fuck, Seb!”

Your thighs began to tremble, and your chest was covered in a sheen of sweat. Sebastian’s teeth sank into his lip. You looked positively delicious as you neared your peak. The noises you made were obscene. Your body writhed in pleasure. Your cunt was clamped around him. He felt ready to explode. But he knew you were close, so he did everything he could to hold off his own climax. But it was so hard. You were in ecstasy because of him. The fact made his head spin and his cock ache.

Your breathing halted altogether as your body tensed, and then suddenly you let out a keening cry and gasped for breath. Your walls fluttered around him, and Sebastian went rigid as he came with you. Waves of pleasure crashed through him as he hissed out a string of expletives.

He collapsed forward, exhausted. You drew him into a kiss with a hand on his cheek. It was slow but still full of passion as your mouths melded together. He rested his forehead on yours and panted in your breaths like he was stealing the air straight from your lungs.

“Fuck,” he said breathlessly.

“Yeah,” you agreed, a smile tugging at your lips.

He kissed you again, and then nuzzled his nose against yours when he pulled back. “I love you.” The words had bubbled up, unable to be contained in his throat. All air left his lungs with their escape. Instead, they filled with panic.

“I love you, too, Sebastian,” you admitted. “I think I have for a long time.”

He could breathe again. He scooped you into his arms and just held you against his chest. He never wanted to let you go. He pressed a kiss to the love bite he’d left on your shoulder. You let out a contented sigh as your hands rubbed up and down his back lazily.

Suddenly, you tensed. “Fuck! I’ve got to go!”

You slid out from under him and began collecting your clothes. Sebastian fished his wand out of the wreckage and summoned the jumper. He mended the cut from his severing charm and vanished your blood from the sleeve. He’d rather rip it to shreds, but he knew you’d want to return it intact. He slid off his suit jacket and transfigured it into a Slytherin jumper.

“Have you seen–?” you started as you looked up after doing up your trousers. Your face broke into amusement as you saw Sebastian holding out the emerald jumper to you.

You took it and slid it over your head.

Sebastian smirked at you. “Green’s much more your colour,” he asserted.

“That makes two of us,” you quipped, winking at him as you pulled your cloak on.

You snagged Garreth’s jumper from Sebastian and rushed for the door.

“What? No kiss goodbye?” he asked.

You spun around, smirking at him as you walked backwards. “I’ll need to wash up properly after detention. You can meet me in the prefect’s bathroom. I think you’ll quite enjoy just how – and where – I’d like to kiss you.”

Sebastian’s pulse jumped. His eyes darkened as they fell on your lips – his witch’s lips. He was still speechless as you slipped through the gate, chuckling at him.

Several thoughts were running through his head all at once. The first was that Ominis would kill him if he found the Undercroft in this state. The second was that you were in need of a date to the Halloween Dance. The third, and most important, was that he should thank Garreth for his inadvertent assistance in getting you to admit your feelings for Sebastian – and tell him to keep his sodding wardrobe to himself.

#sebastian sallow #hogwarts legacy #sebastian sallow x mc #sebastian sallow x f!mc #hogwarts legacy fanfic #sebastian sallow fanfiction #sebastian x mc #sebastian sallow fanfic #hogwarts legacy fanfiction #sebastian sallow x reader #jealous sebastian sallow

[f1letters]

labyrinth | aa23

"uh-oh, I'm falling in love, oh no, I'm falling in love again"

summary: it's safe to say she wasn't expecting to fall in love so quickly after just ending a five-year relationship, but alex albon was just everything she needed without even realizing it

warning: overall fluff with a little hint of angst, rom-com vibes, brother's best friend, recent breakup, mentions of falling out of love with someone, reader's ex has a name (Harry), mentions of Alex breaking his collarbone when he was cycling with George (I still remember laughing so hard when I read about this lol), reader completely clueless that her feelings are reciprocated, big romantic gesture in the end, swearing

pairing: alex albon x russell!reader

word count: 3.9k

note: everything in bold are song references and in italic are thoughts, which includes memories from the past.

living for the rom-com content this week! haha, I hope everyone enjoys their daily dose of sweet, fluffy, perfect alex because he owns my heart and I'm always a sucker for the brother's best friend trope! haha

masterlist

"It only hurts this much right now"

Was what I was thinkin' the whole time

Breathe in, breathe through, breathe deep, breathe out

I'll be gettin' over you my whole life

Having the painful realization that you fell out of love with someone you still adore immensely feels almost like losing touch with reality for a moment.

All of a sudden, your entire life changes.

You find yourself loving old memories more than the opportunity to create new ones. 

You feel afraid of leaving all the plans and all the dreams you spoke of fulfilling behind.

You realize you're trapped in the past, stuck in the old idea you still have preciously stored in your head of how they used to be.

Y/N felt like she was losing a part of herself now that Harry was gone.

It was five years together after all. Five years of ups and downs, of laughter and tears, of happiness and anger, of dreams and nightmares.

But as much as she tried to find the butterflies she felt at the beginning in every detail of him, when the young woman looked at her long-time partner she could only see traces of what they once were.

Stupidly, it hurt more that they'd broken up on nice terms. Maybe if they'd had a dramatic, fiery ending she'd have had an easier time moving on.

But fuck, he was still one of the best people she'd ever met. Things just weren't working anymore and their paths didn't seem to align anymore.

Y/N was more than convinced that she would be getting over him her whole life.

At that point, her only source of sanity was her brother's unconditional support. Well... Sanity might have been a strong term.

George had become a true helicopter brother, constantly glued to her side, even if it meant dragging her around the world with him.

It had been a month since Y/N and Harry had been separated and the girl had managed to cross three continents in that time. What a fancy way to deal with heartbreak.

But in one of the few moments when the younger Russell managed to escape her sibling's watchful eyes, Y/N found herself with tears in her eyes, her heart shattered on the floor and her head spinning.

As much as she tried to suppress the sobs that were coming out of her mouth, her cries did not go unnoticed by the attentive ears of the Thai driver who passed by the Mercedes motorhome on his way to visit his best friend.

You know how scared I am of elevators

Never trust it if it rises fast

It can't last

Taking a detour from his previously planned route, Alex carefully approached the crying girl, placing a hand on her forearm which made her turn towards him abruptly.

He felt a tightness in his chest as soon as he saw her smudged, red eyes. "Hey little Russ, are you okay?"

Y/N quickly wiped her eyes with the back of her black long sleeve, putting on a forced smile. "Alex, hey! Oh, it's nothing, I'm okay. Don't worry."

"You were always a terrible liar, you know that?" The boy leaned against the wall, his eyes still fixed on hers. "You can talk to me, Y/N. I promise I'll take your secrets to the grave. Scout's honour!"

The young woman laughed. She knew that the driver was someone she could trust. After all, he had been a constant presence in her life for many years now through George, even if she was never that close to him.

"It's so... Stupid, I feel ridiculous." She confessed, looking up at the open sky and letting out a sad sigh. "Harry is seeing someone new."

"Harry as in your bore of an ex Harry?" She rolled her eyes but nodded yes. "Damn, already? Do you think... Do you think he was already seeing her before you split?"

"No, he wouldn't." The girl spoke. "The thing is neither of us was happy in that relationship, and I know we made the right choice, but... It doesn't hurt any less to see the person who was with you for years move on."

Not knowing exactly what moved him to do so, Alex let his hand run along her soft hair in an act of comfort. Y/N found herself feeling a familiar feeling in her stomach, although she wasn't sure what it was.

"Look, don't waste your time dwelling on that." The driver said as he continued to play with the ends of her locks. "I'm sure that someday he won't be more than a distant memory and that you have a bright future waiting for you with someone who makes you feel like the best version of yourself."

"Alex Albon, what an amazing motivational speech, who knew you were so poetic!" She made him laugh and then hugged him from the side, resting her face on his arm. "But really, thank you. I needed this."

"Anytime, little Russ." He rested his face on the top of her head momentarily, only to push away almost immediately. "So, ready to see your brother get his ass kicked today?"

Y/N felt her palms sweat as she walked next to the boy on their way to her brother, still confused about the sudden effect Thai had on her.

It's just a moment of weakness, it won't last, she tried to convince herself, he's your brother's best friend for God's sake.

Uh-oh, I'm fallin' in love

Oh no, I'm fallin' in love again

Oh, I'm fallin' in love

I thought the plane was goin' down

How'd you turn it right around?

From that moment on, and for some reason mysterious to both of them, they seemed to seek each other out whenever the occasion presented itself.

Y/N would purposefully extend her path to Mercedes on race days in hopes of passing Alex by Williams to wish him luck.

And boy, if Alex didn't make an effort to spend as much time outside the motorhome as possible praying that the girl who he couldn't get out of his head would show up, even if she always had George next to her.

In the middle of all their yearning, the two had started an unspoken tradition during the weeks that followed, which made them feel all warm and fuzzy inside in true puppy love fashion.

On another Sunday like all the others, Alex was lost in conversation with Lando in front of his team's motorhome when - to his shock - he saw the girl about to pass by him... Alone?

Leaving his friend behind with just a few words and a confused look on the British driver's face, Alex hurried over to her, putting his arm around the girl's shoulders.

"Well, well, well... What do we have here? A rare sight of Y/N without her bodyguard?" He spoke with a mischievous smirk.

"Yeah, looks like I got left behind today." Y/N chuckled, eyes twinkling in his direction.

"I never seem to get you alone around these parts. Is Georgie really that controlling?" Alex laughed, knowing full well that his friend had always been very protective of his sister. 

Yikes, if he only knew the way his best friend thought about her now.

"So you wanted to get me alone, unh?" Y/N teased the man, without controlling the flirtatious energy with which her question came out of her mouth.

Alex was taken aback but didn't hesitate to respond with the same tone. "And what if I wanted to?"

"Didn't know you were such a flirt, Albon!" She said, teasingly. "My brother, on the other hand, might not be very happy that his best friend is trying to make a move on his baby sister." The girl stated with a serious look, although her mouth still revealed a smirk.

"He doesn't need to know." The driver said as he started walking back to the building, but not before turning to her again and speaking. "If you don't have plans tonight, let's do something. What do you say?"

"I'll think about it." She said, grinning from ear to ear. "Good luck, lover boy."

Uh-oh, I'm falling in love, she realized as her heart pounded in her chest.

It only feels this raw right now

Lost in the labyrinth of my mind

Break up, break free, break through, break down

You would break your back to make me break a smile

Y/N really thought of not going. 

It would've spared her the inevitable heartbreak she was going to go through when her brother eventually found out that she had feelings for Alex.

But on the spur of the moment, the young woman chose to worry about her fears later and take her chances, as she stormed out of her hotel room towards the driver's.

Y/N knocked on his door nervously and it only took a few seconds for Alex to show up, with only his shorts on, his hair dishevelled and his toned chest on full display.

"Y/N, you came," he said, an obviously surprised look on his face. "I thought you had bailed."

Oh great, he has someone in there with him, she thought as soon as she saw the strands of his golden hair all tousled. "Oh, I'm so sorry, I didn't know you had company. I'm going to g-"

"What?" He asked lost until he realized the state he was in. "Oh no, no, no! I ended up falling asleep when I realized you weren't com- Or rather when I thought you weren't coming. Please, come in."

The girl entered the room, studying her surroundings while Alex put on a sweatshirt.

"I honestly had lost all hope that you were going to show up," He chuckled timidly. "But I'm so glad you proved me wrong."

After some discussion, the two ended up settling on ordering room service and rewatching The Office - obsessed with the show they had seen it dozens of times over the years - while they ate their late dinner sitting on his giant bed and talked to each other about everything.

"Why did you guys go cycling into the middle of the forest... If the brakes on the fucking bike didn't work?" Tears were now streaming down the girl's eyes, she was laughing so hard at the story Alex was telling her.

"Hey, stop laughing! I broke my collarbone!" The driver already felt stomach pains from laughing so hard and he pushed her until she fell backwards onto the mattress. "And you should know I saved your brother's ass! I gave him the good bike and that's how the universe thanked me!"

"Stop, stop!" She remained laying on the bed, arms hugging her stomach. "I can't laugh anymore or I swear I'll pass out."

Lying down next to her, Alex looked at the girl with passionate eyes. "I'm glad me breaking a bone at least made you break a smile."

At that moment, lost in his gaze, Y/N knew she was in too deep and there was no way back.

You know how much I hate

That everybody just expects me to bounce back

Just like that

Now that the two had already crossed the line and they had spent time one on one, the two friends - or so they liked to call themselves, their feelings still hidden from both parties - were inseparable.

Whenever they could they found themselves together: whether it was within four walls late at night just enjoying each other's company, or exploring cities around the world after getting rid of George with a lame excuse.

So, when Y/N received a message from the driver inviting her to dinner, she wasn't surprised or questioned anything.

It was at a restaurant where the two had already been several times in Monaco along with other friends, so the girl just assumed that the same would happen this time around too.

However, hours later, when she questioned George about his plans for that evening - convinced that her question would spark a debate about rides to the restaurant - the words that came out of his mouth quickly made her realize that she had the wrong idea all along.

"I'll probably just stay home and play with the boys. Well, other than Alex, apparently he has a hot date today with some girl he's been all mysterious about."

A d- d- date. Was this supposed to be a date?!

"Oh." She felt her face go white in shock, something that thankfully went unnoticed by her brother as he was glued to his phone. "I- I'll be right back."

The girl ran upstairs to her room and grabbed her cell phone to reread Alex's message.

From: lover boy

what do you think about dinner with your favourite guy tonight at blue bay, 7pm? 👀 

All of a sudden, her palms got sweaty, her heart rate started to increase, and she started to feel apprehensive.

Of course, she had already come to terms with the fact that she had feelings for him but him liking her back?

Surely it was nothing more than a misunderstanding and tonight was nothing more than a dinner between friends.

Uh-oh, I'm fallin' in love

Oh no, I'm fallin' in love again

Oh, I'm fallin' in love

I thought the plane was goin' down

How'd you turn it right around?

The hours passed and she found herself dolled up in a simple long blue dress on her way to where Alex was waiting for her completely alone and more beautiful than ever.

It was a date, there was no question about it.

Alex held out his hand for her to help her out of the taxi and kept it in Y/N's as he looked at her in astonishment. "Jesus, you- You look... Incredible. Fucking incredible really. Shall we go in, little Russ?"

With the simple use of the nickname he always used, Y/N closed herself within her walls as she remembered how wrong she was for going after Alex on her brother's back.

And with that remembrance alone, the date was already ruined before it even started.

For a couple of hours, the two sat at a glamorous table making small, forced talk. Even Alex gave up trying to keep the conversation going when he realized she wasn't feeling it.

The driver felt like the dumbest person on the planet at that moment: not only had he broken his best friend's trust, but he had done it just to have his heart broken in the end.

The silence continued on the ride home, with Alex offering to drive her back like a true gentleman even after the whole dinner fiasco. After a few torturous minutes, he stopped the car and she put her hand on the door handle so fast his heart only shattered more.

"Well, thanks for dinner." She said, her eyes glued to her lap afraid to face him. "I- I'll see you soon, good night."

Alex saw her get out of his Mercedes but unable to accept that this was it, the driver jumped out of the driver's seat towards her. "Wait!"

The girl turned back, coming face to face with the dishevelled image of the boy rushing towards her.

"What went wrong tonight?" Alex asked distraught, letting his hand run through his hair. "I thought I was pretty clear that I cared a lot about you. Hell, I thought you felt the same way. Did I misunderstand things between us that badly all these months we spent together?"

Oh no, I'm falling in love again, she thought to herself and dread filled her from top to bottom like a shiver.

"I'm sorry, Alex," She said, still unable to look at him, especially now that tears were threatening to fall from her eyes. "But I just can't do this right now."

And without even answering, Alex simply walked away.

Uh-oh, I'm fallin' in love

Oh no, I'm fallin' in love again

Oh, I'm fallin' in love

I thought the plane was goin' down

How'd you turn it right around?

After spending months on end talking every day, it all became radio silent.

Y/N couldn't help but blame herself for ending up hurt. He'd put his heart on the line and confronted the undeniable feelings between them, only for her to let fear drive her and ruin everything.

She was the only one responsible for the sudden lump she felt in her throat, for the heaviness of her heart and for the wave of sadness that hit her.

It only got worse when a week later she saw his misery-written face on yet another race weekend, as she got choked with tears, thanks to the painful distance now set between them.

One week turned into two and those feelings of hopelessness and melancholy were still in the air, something that did not escape George's watchful eye.

Taking his place on the sofa next to the girl wrapped in a blanket drinking tea, the elder Russell sat down without much care and let out an exhausted sigh.

"Crikey, what's up with everyone? I swear you've all been in a bad mood lately." He said, without getting a response back. "Did you and Alex plan to get all depressed together or something? Jesus."

The girl gulped at 'her and Alex' and 'together' being in the same sentence, as she tried to keep her concentration on the movie that was on TV.

"He's been all upset since he went on that date I told you about. Apparently, it was a complete failure and now I'll never know who the girl was." George laughed, shaking his head. "I never understood the secrecy. It's not like he went out with you or som-"

Unconsciously, Y/N turned her face towards the large glass window embarrassed but quickly realized that her reaction had given her away.

"Oh, my God," George spoke slowly, trying to accept what he had just realized. "It was you?"

"It doesn't matter now." She finally seemed to get her voice back. "It was a silly decision but it's over anyways."

"What happened?"

"It's over, I told you. I never should have even developed feelings for him." Y/N looked into her brother's eyes, tears forming. "I knew he was your best friend and I still didn't put a stop to things. I'm so so sorry, G."

"Y/N…" The driver leaned against the back of the sofa and brought his hand to his forehead. "Please tell me you didn't break his heart because you thought I would be bothered by you guys going out."

Uh-oh, I'm fallin' in love

Oh no, I'm fallin' in love again

Oh, I'm fallin' in love

I thought the plane was goin' down

How'd you turn it right around?

"Just now you were saying the only reason he should hide a date is if he was going to go out with me!" The girl's voice rose. "Of course, I had to put a stop to it before things went too far!"

"I said it was the only reason he WOULDN'T tell me, not that he SHOULD hide it!" Her brother screamed along with her.

The two sat silently contemplating each other's words until George spoke. "Little sis, I'm sorry to break it to you but I think things have gone too far just by looking at your broken faces these past days."

Oh, he's right, I'm definitely falling in love, she finally accepted.

"Alex is one of the best people I know and I trust him with my life. I couldn't ask for a better person to be by my sister's side if you guys love each other." The man said, his hands resting on each of her shoulders. "Go for it and get him back."

Uh-oh, I'm fallin' in love

Oh no, I'm fallin' in love again

Oh, I'm fallin' in love

Speeding as if her life depended on it, Y/N reached the house of the boy who had her heart and knocked incessantly on his door.

"Calm down, who the f-" Alex opened the door, ready to argue with the person on the other side until he realized it was her. "Y/N."

"Before you send me away, please listen to what I have to say." Y/N pleaded while Alex observed the girl. 

She was in his doorway, still wearing her pyjamas, fluffy pink slippers on her feet, with a beanie and a scarf that she at least remembered to grab on her way out or she wouldn't have survived the cold.

"I was a complete idiot for letting you go that night. What I should have done was run after you, begged for a second chance and told you that I'm falling for you and have been since the day you found me crying in the back of that motorhome."

"I was at my worst and you still managed to put me back together and turn it right around. You are literally the man of my dreams. You have everything I want and need in a partner, and I never should have let this drag on for so long in the first place. So please, give me a chance to show you how happy and great we can be together."

The two seemed frozen at the moment, with their hearts on their sleeves and eyes filled with love and hope for a happy ending, until they heard someone from inside the house clearing their throat.

Turning to face his living room, Y/N now noticed the group of drivers - and unfortunately friends of her brother as well - with sly smiles on their faces. "Oh God, please kill me now."

"It was quite the speech, Russell, but maybe we should go." Lando spoke, grinning at the girl, as he, Charles, Pierre and Carlos left the apartment.

"I will never show my face in the paddock again." She said to Alex, covering her face with her hands.

The Thai affectionately removed her hands, intertwining them with his, and approached her, with a smile the size of the world. "I don't know. I agree with Lando, it was quite the speech indeed."

Without thinking twice, and before he could change his mind, Y/N placed her lips on his in a kiss that both of them had been craving for months.

And the moment their mouths met, they both discovered what it was like to feel that one person was their home.

"What about George?" Alex questioned, pulling away slightly from her.

"He almost pushed me out of the house to come here and make things right." The girl laughed, circling the tall boy's waist with her arms.

"Well, little Russ, looks like I'm going to have to buy Georgie dinner as a 'thank you'." He chuckled, grateful for his best friend. "Or should I say, my future brother-in-law?"

"Calm down, lover boy. I've been here for a few minutes." They laughed together, wrapped up in each other. "We have all the time in the world to think about the future."

Sometimes it only takes one painful heartbreak to help us see we are worth so much more than we're settling for.

I thought the plane was goin' down

How'd you turn it right around?

taglist: @dan3avocado @starxqt @roseinnej @spiidergirlsworld @ccloaned @hotpigeon22 @dr3lover @lovelytsunoda @primadonnasdream @luxebeautystyle @wallfloweriism @ilivefortheleague @gwynethhberdara @satellitelh @adavenus @audreyscodes @wifeoflucyboynton @th6ccnsp6cyy @classifiedsblog @flyingmushroomss @motylekrozi @claramllera @gabrielamaex @handsupforamiracle @pierre-gasssllyy @lorenaloveslewis

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(taglist continues in the comments)

thank you to everyone that asked to be tagged! please let me know if you want to be added to the next stories! 💌

#f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 fanfiction #formula 1 imagine #f1 one shot #alex albon imagine #alex albon x reader #alex albon #aa23 #f1letters #f1 x reader #f1 x taylor swift #f1 x midnights #Spotify #alex albon one shot #alexander albon #alexander albon imagine #formula 1 one shot #alex albon fluff #alexander albon fluff #aa23 x reader #alex albon fic #f1 fic

[unicyclehippo]

spare some vexleth? maybe? "i don't believe this"

‘i don’t believe this. i don’t believe you. you should have told us.’

‘and when was i - ow - supposed to do that? how? maybe when you were all the way across the continent in emon organising the armies, doing exactly what i was trying to do? maybe i should have - ah - told you then! can you please stop trying to make me sit!’ she growls at her helper—someone left behind by her right hand, who doesn’t deserve to be growled at, but if they touch her one more time… her growl deepens.

they scurry to the door, yanking it shut behind them to “give the tempest time with her guest” she hears from the antechamber.

across the room, vex purses her lips to keep from smiling; she’s upset, still, about keyleth’s wounds and finding out from esqoult of all people—whom vex considers an “idiotic blowhard tight-fisted hateful byblow of a rock” at the best of times—and the attack at the red centre and vax. unceasingly she is upset about vax. unceasingly, his death follows them both like feathers in their hair; he is their constant, dark companion. keyleth’s near death, however, is far more recent and unclosing wounds is a new and hellish experience that hurts them both.

anger crackles in her gut. she hasn’t the energy to shift forms but smoke curls in tendrils out of her nose, sparks smoulder in the one fist she can actually close. her other hand aches, split to bone.

‘sending stones aren’t working. our earrings aren’t working. sending—‘ she takes a moment to breathe. it hurts. ‘sending spells aren’t working, not that i have that anyway. and a bird,’ she grunts, propping herself against the headboard, ‘would take days at the very least. so tell me, lady vex’ahlia, when exactly was i supposed to tell you?’

‘i don’t know! but when you’re nearly dead, you make the effort!’ vex commands.

it looks good on her. keyleth can admit that in very private thoughts and fever dreams. maybe a death bed. she stares across at vex, who has only ever grown into her considerable beauty, and manages a shaky smile. command has always looked good on vex.

‘missed you. if that - i don’t know - helps.’

vex snorts. ‘yes, darling, i missed you too. obviously. i’m furious with you that you nearly died, oh and also we really must meet up when the world isn’t alarmingly close to being obliterated.’

‘brunch?’

‘girls day. i’ll invite pike.’

‘i thought - just you and me,’ keyleth says, trying on a flirtatious smile. it’s been a long time since she wore it last, some fifteen, twenty years. it feels weird so she stops trying. ‘ignore that. ignore me. i’m- death bed propositions.’

‘stop it. you’re not in your death bed.’

keyleth glances around the room. it’s empty, just her and vex, so she can admit, ‘feels like it.’

vex softens. she always does. she gets angry first, angry and scared, because she’s lost a lot in her time and she learned early and harder than most that the only way to stop that was to fight back with everything, anything. she does bitter and snide and bitchy and mocking better than anyone keyleth knows, but that’s because vex is better than anyone keyleth knows, and it all comes from the same heart. vex softens, and she comes to sit lightly on the side of keyleth’s bed.

‘what can i do?’

‘nothing. nothing. it’s all - there’s people helping me already. cursed flowers and potion stuff. bells hells.’

vex starts. ‘the ones who came to us? with her?’

‘did you -‘ she can move, a little. it hurts but hell, what in life doesn’t hurt? she covers vex’s hand with hers. ‘did you talk to her? i saw her - alive this time. she’s…sweet. strange but sweet.’

‘i know. at least, i thought so.’

keyleth slid her fingers over vex’s. ‘you gave her your ring.’

vex laughs, bitter-edged. ‘yes, and it made up entirely for all the shit that poor girl has been through.’

‘not your fault. it isn’t,’ she insists, when vex goes all stone-jawed and stubborn. ‘didn’t you - tell percy that? it’s true for him too. isn’t it?’

vex rolls her eyes to the ceiling. makes a wet, disgusted noise. ‘i suppose.’ after a long moment, she says, ‘how did she look? delilah’s doll?’

‘don’t call her that.’

‘my lookalike.’

‘she doesn’t look much like you,’ keyleth tells her. it’s a lie. she looks so much like vex had, like vax does in their memories. young. ‘i don’t know. they’re due back today, maybe tomorrow. stay. you can - ow - talk to her.’

vex nods. strokes keyleth’s clenched hand. ‘i’ll stay until you’re well.’

‘you’re a hero, vex. you’re needed elsewhere, i’m sure,’

‘keyleth, it’s war. the treasury is open. they don’t need me for that—they need my very expert clerks, gods bless them. i’m here with you.’ the stubborn look resolidifies. vex tilts her head in such a way that keyleth is sure her heart is about to fall right out of her split-open chest, and leans forward to press a kiss to the corner of her mouth. pulling back, she searches keyleth’s eyes; whatever she finds there makes her nod, quite satisfied, and she smiles. ‘besides, your assistants are going to need a hero to keep you in bed and resting. i volunteer, as it happens.’

#tagging my stories #prompt fill #vexleth in the year 2023? yeah I guess!! #cr fic #vexleth

[letsgetrowdy43]

Say yes to heaven ☆—

This takes place from Christmas 2020 to the spring of 2021

Warnings: heavy making out, swearing, lmk if anything else :)

The first part

Au Masterlist!!

It had been months since Honey and Quinn's summer of rendevous, the nights of secret-filled kisses and promises of a forever slowly withered away with time as the autumn months approached. On their last night together in Michigan the two of them sat down in her room at the lake house and talked about it all, from the break up to what they wanted after she was done school.

He'd asked her only one question that entire night "what do you want in your life?", it was simple really, but Honey was at a loss for words. How do you say 'the only thing I've ever wanted in my life is you' without sounding completely lost, like she needed to re-evaluate her entire being. But it was the truth, Quinn was really all she wanted, she had only ever pictured a life with him in it, where he was she would settle, it seemed so unworldy but it was something she'd decided long before everything got messy. Instead she settled for a quick "I dont know yet," leaving both of them disatified with the conversation.

The next morning regret of falling back into old habits hit Honey as she watched him pack up his bags and head to the airport, she missed him a lot more than she cared to let on, but this was how it was meant to be, longing for love on two different sides of the continent.

☆☆☆

Honey was asked to go with Team USA to the World Juniors to help with the media during her Christmas break, seeing as the pandemic had taken a hit on hockey at the time it was the only work she'd really been offered in a while so she took the opportunity.

Quinn on the other hand had been itching to see her, the moment he pulled into his driveway with Jack he expected to her be at his house along with her family waiting in their kitchen for family dinner as they usually did when they were finally altogether. He was gravely disappointed when he walked into his house to only see her parents and older brother on the couch, with no Honey in sight.

Honey's senior year had gonna by quicker than she'd anticipated, after Christmas it felt as if in the blink of an eye she was searching for a grad dress and searching for media jobs in the Michigan area. She also gave in to her curiosity and looked into jobs in the Vancouver area as well, pretending not to be upset as she job searched, fully knowing that there was and probably wouldn't ever be a set plan for her to move in with Quinn.

She and Quinn had yet to talk about if their futures aligned, she silently hoped that maybe he would ask her to get back together cause there was no one else out there for her, she knew that, but she wasn't going to be the girl to insert herself into his new life.

The night before her graduation she received a short message from Quinn saying sorry to her for not being able to make it to her big day, telling her how proud he was of her for accomplishing her dreams and wishing her well. She followed his text up with a quick thanks and a joke about him being a university dropout, then turned off her phone and cried in her room as she laid out her cap, gown, and dress.

Something about his absence felt suffocating, this was something she always pictured, and she had always imagined Quinn next to her during all of it. She remembers the end of their sophomore year and how hopeful they had both been in their relationship, it felt like a slap in the face, they were so naive to what the reality would be for their futures.

So now she sat in her bed, deep breathing as she tried to calm herself down to get a good night's sleep.

The next morning was hectic, getting up just as the sun began to rise to get her hair and makeup done, and her dress ironed along with every other small routine she needed in order for her morning to go as perfectly and smoothly as possible.

A quiet knock on her door startled her out of her anxious daze, she fixed the sleeve of her dress and opened the door to see a smiling Quinn in a suit. "You're here?" she said as she pulled herself into his chest, his arms wrapping around her as he held her for the first time in nearly a year. "You really thought I wouldn't make it?" "Yes, and I was mad at you for it" she laughed as she pulled away, her eyes tracing his face, thumb running over the growing beard, face seemingly more mature than the last time she had laid eyes on him, he looked really good. "I could hear the anger in your message," he whispered as his hands found solace on her waist before she allowed him to enter her apartment bedroom, and motioned him to take a seat on her bed.

She searched her room for her jewellery box, Quinn watched her brows furrow as she finally found it, his heart thumping in his chest as he grabbed the small box from his pants pocket. "Hun?" he whispered as she made her way over to him, she stood in between his legs as she put her last earring in, an awkward smile on her face as he stared up at her, "this is for you" he then pressed the small black box into her palm.

Nerves filling his stomach as she opened the tiny box, "you really didn't have to get me anything," she paused as she revealed a key, "is this?" "It's a key to my apartment, I know you said you didn't know where you were gonna end up after school, but a little selfish piece of me wants you all to myself in Vancouver," he mumbled as her gaze switched between the key and him. A grin grew on her face as she nodded, not ready to giving him a verbal answer just yet.

"Can I kiss you?" she asked lowly as she held the key in her hand, such a small thing that just changed the entire trajectory of her entire life. "Please," he mumbled, staring up at her with lustful eyes as she cupped his face as smashed her lips onto his.

His hands gripped her thighs as he pulled her forward and into his lap, "did I tell you how pretty you look today?" he pulled away and rested his forehead against hers. She shook her head and placed a kiss on his jaw, "did I tell you that I think the beard is hot," she grinned as his face broke out into a smile, his hand finding the back of her neck and pulling her down to kiss her again.

"I missed this so much," she said in between kisses, smiling at how careful Quin was, trying not to ruin her hair. He hummed, "m' never letting you go again," he whispered as his hands travelled down to her ass, making her laugh at the suprise contact.

"Guys!" Jack swung the door open to tell them that everyone was taking pictures, but screamed at the sight before him and slammed the door shut. "I'm not ready to deal with that," she whispered with a laugh as she looked at a wide-eyed Quiin, placing a kiss on his cheek as she got up off of Quinn's lap to flatten out her dress. "He should've knocked" Quinn shrugged and straightened out his tie, cheeks a cute pink hue as Honey took his hand and led him downstairs.

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