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jamiiviper · 3 years

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The Jamil Essay

this is a reupload of a post i made a couple of weeks ago - previously it was an external link to a google doc, so it never showed up in any of the twst tags, but i worked so hard on this and i would really love it if more people read it, so i’m reuploading directly to tumblr.

to put it simply, this is a 3.7k word character analysis purely about jamil. and even with a word count like that i wasn’t quite able to cover everything i wanted to say, so who knows, maybe there’ll be a part 2 one day. i’ve also decided i do want to write a kalim version, so i’ll probably start working on that sometime soon! stay tuned!

trigger warnings: mentions of child abuse

jamil is the vice dorm leader of scarabia, who’s been kalim’s caretaker practically since birth. he puts on a facade of not standing out, preferring to remain completely average, and plans his life around kalim’s antics. as we learned in chapter 4, however, his true feelings are that he bears a lot of resentment towards kalim, and that he wants to stand out - he just wasn’t allowed to, as he can never surpass kalim.

in this essay i want to cover not just my personal interpretation of jamil, but also some common misconceptions that people tend to have about him. twitter doesn’t have this problem as much, but with tumblr i’ve found that there are very few jamil stans, especially in the theory and writing communities - meaning it’s quite common for people to misunderstand his character. in the fandom as a whole, it’s common for people to only acknowledge him insofar as “gay for kalim”.

firstly, jamil’s character development in the main story - i would say he’s arguably the best-developed character in twst, since yana now has enough chapters available to flesh out characters after their main story arc ended. jamil holds very deep-seated resentment against kalim, to the point that he plotted to betray him for probably several years. he plotted to have kalim not just thrown out of nrc, but thoroughly ruin his reputation in the process. after his overblot, those feelings did not magically vanish - far from it. i think earlier twst chapters suffered from arcs being wrapped up a little too neatly post-overblot, but pomefiore’s arc has already proved itself to be the exception and thoroughly covers not just jamil’s continued dislike for kalim, but also the wider consequences for what he did.

since the twst school year begins in september, we know jamil is about 9 months older than kalim. from literally the day kalim was born, jamil’s life has been dedicated to kalim. possibly since the day jamil was born, and he was always fated to be kalim’s caretaker. it may even have been the reason he was born at all. either way, it’s not like he remembers those 9 months. all jamil has ever known is that his sole purpose must be to serve kalim. he must not have desires of his own, he must not do anything for himself - from childhood he was expected to be ready to give up his life for kalim at a moment’s notice. he can’t be good at anything - kalim must always be better (i’ll cover this in more depth in a later paragraph, this philosophy is key to his character). his own parents drilled this into him, even going to the extent of hitting him if he didn’t comply. it seems he has a normal relationship with his family despite this - he bickers with his sister like regular siblings, and pre-overblot he indicated that his desire to be free from servitude wasn’t just about him, he wanted to free his family. nonetheless, the psychological damage his childhood caused him is severe. is it any wonder his unique magic is mind control, when he’s never had an ounce of control over his own life?

moving onto his early teen years, we know both jamil and kalim were severely poisoned at one point, both falling into comas for around two weeks. although we don’t have a timeframe for jamil’s coma, we know kalim’s was when they were around 13 years old. if jamil’s was around this age too - probably a short while afterwards - i think it’s plain to see why jamil’s resentment began to build. he’d have been around the age where he first started to question why his life has to revolve around kalim. why should he be expected to die for someone he doesn’t even like, who’s spoiled and doesn’t realise how much jamil does for him? kalim takes everything for granted: status, friendships, freedom, and jamil is meanwhile left in the shadows with nothing. then one day kalim gets poisoned so badly he falls into a coma - how much do you want to bet jamil was blamed for that, at the age of 13? after that he’s expected to taste-test anything kalim eats beforehand, and eventually starts making all his meals for him because the risk of poison is so high otherwise. then one day he slips up, or it’s an undetectable poison, and jamil is the one to fall into a coma. is anyone blamed for that? does anyone pity jamil outside of his immediate family + kalim? no, probably not. after all, he’s just doing his duty, right? it’s truly… no wonder jamil’s resentment became so intense. he finally has proof that his life truly does not matter. although kalim certainly cares about him, he doesn’t understand jamil’s position. he sees jamil as a friend, an equal; jamil knows this can never be the case, and he also knows kalim is too privileged to ever hope to understand.

fast forward on a couple of years to jamil receiving his nrc acceptance letter. he thinks that finally, finally he’s going to be free. four years of freedom - and who knows, maybe after that he can be free forever! he can finally excel at his classes and be his true self, without fear of upstaging kalim!

and then kalim gets accepted a month late. for no reason other than his surname.

and then kalim gets sorted into his dorm.

it’s a miracle he didn’t just overblot on the spot - but that’s his nature as a scarabia student. careful foresight and planning. this moment was, undoubtedly, the moment he started planning his betrayal. he had his one month of freedom ripped away, just like that.

oh, don’t forget the fact that not long after, kalim was made dorm leader not because he notably embodies scarabia values at all, but because of nepotism. (side note: most scarabia stans agree kalim does actually reflect scarabia values, just not as obviously as jamil does, but either way jamil himself wouldn’t see it this way. this is a jamil essay so i won’t go in depth about this unless asked to!)

under kalim’s watch, scarabia - known for its intelligence and cunning - is turned into “the party dorm”. this seems to be the fandom’s perception of them too - i mean, just ask any non-scarabia stan what goes on in scarabia, that’s probably the answer they’ll give you. jamil would have probably loved the original scarabia; although we don’t know much about it, we know scarabia students are on a par with octavinelle when it comes to intelligence (paralleling azul’s constant interest in jamil). yet by winter break, scarabia is doing so badly in those same exams that they didn’t even place in the rankings…? without meaning to, kalim clearly harmed scarabia. instead of getting chance to study magic and show off, jamil is now essentially an unpaid, full-time party planner by the time his second year starts.

a few months later, winter break finally arrives, and jamil executes his plan to dethrone kalim. i may have just spent the last two pages defending jamil’s grudge, but his actions themselves are still indefensible. there’s evidence to suggest kalim knew what was occurring on some level - refusing to answer jade’s question about who was hypnotising him proved that 1) he probably had some idea deep down that jamil was betraying him 2) he doesn’t want jamil to get in trouble for it. nonetheless, this does not make what jamil did okay in the slightest, even if kalim allowed it to happen. jamil is, undoubtedly, the bad guy in this situation, no matter how sympathetic his childhood makes you feel. i could go into detail about why kalim acted the way he did, but again, this is jamil-focused.

i’ll skip talking about his overblot, because i covered his hatred for kalim in a lot of depth already and i want to talk about the general aspects of his personality like his desire for praise later on. so moving onto the end of chapter 4, we see jamil’s true self: a snarky, heavily opinionated boy who honestly just wants to be free to be himself.

but just like his freedom, that side of jamil once again only lasts for a brief moment. jamil almost loses everything after his overblot. practically every scarabia student hates him and wants him thrown out of the dorm - even kalim, his sole defender, can’t call him a good person. he’s a traitor. he says he trusts the scarabia students to work out that it’s better for them if he stays, but that day won’t come any time soon, and until then he’s keeping his distance from them all, because their hatred is that strong. if azul truly had been streaming to more people than just jade, his life would have been ruined beyond repair. so what does jamil do? he goes back to serving kalim. as a scarabia student, his foresight is good enough that he knows the option he hates the most is the only one that’ll be good for him in the end. for jamil, being himself is nothing short of a death sentence.

now i’ve talked for far too long about the timeline of his character arc, i can finally get to the good stuff: jamil’s personality, and how it’s changed throughout the stories we’ve seen so far.

the first thing that springs to mind when you think of jamil, other than “snake”, is probably “tired”. or “he’s going to snap”. something along those lines. which... yes, we know he is. he did snap. after chapter 4, this doesn’t seem to have changed too much, but i do get the impression that he’s somewhat less stressed out by kalim. his resentment has dissipated, for the most part (he does still openly insult him, though), so while he does grumble at kalim there’s no suppressed fury behind it. what replaced that fury?

guilt.

in 5-10, jamil tells azul that he intends to continue to obediently follow kalim around in order to restore his reputation, both inside and outside of scarabia. this does of course make him sound pretty selfish (as per usual), and in classic jamil fashion he doesn’t let his true emotions show, so it’s easy to take this at face value and assume he just doesn’t really care. i think in this case, we need to look more at his actions that we see throughout chapter 5. namely, the way it’s being emphasised how he’s silently watching kalim from afar - something he’s always done, yes, but yana seems to be really making a point of it in chapter 5. it’s not just kalim he’s distancing himself from, either. he’s staying away from the rest of the scarabia students too, as mentioned earlier. he never had any friends at all to rely on, even before his overblot. so by doing this, he’s effectively completely isolating himself. he clearly has a lot of thoughts about everything that he’s not sharing with anyone - just listen to the way he sighs at the end of the flashback in 5-10, how annoyed and frustrated he seems. if jamil was telling the truth about just wanting to restore his reputation, he’d probably appreciate kalim’s efforts, even if he dislikes kalim himself. he shouldn’t be upset by kalim persuading the scarabia students to give him another chance. not if he truly just wants to get back to normal. i think on some level, jamil feels incredibly guilty over his actions. he might not have even admitted to himself yet that he feels this way, and by saying things like “i just want to restore my reputation” he’s just trying to convince himself. after all, that’s something he has a history of doing.

ever since jamil’s first introduction, we’ve known jamil lives his life by the philosophy of “not standing out is the best way to succeed”. he hates standing out or receiving any kind of positive attention at all, because he thinks that it’ll only attract trouble. or so we thought, because as we learned from his overblot, jamil desperately wants to stand out. he’s powerful and intelligent, and he wants people to acknowledge that. he wants the praise and recognition he knows he deserves. this means that whenever he said he didn’t want to stand out, he was lying through his teeth - he probably constantly tried and failed to convince himself of this throughout his childhood. during his lab SR story, he even repeats it to himself in his thoughts, like a mantra - “I want to avoid standing out. I can’t be satisfied with this. I cannot be too good, nor fall behind, and neither should I get satisfactory grades or fail. This is the best shortcut to success.”. much like his feelings of guilt, jamil refused to acknowledge how much he truly wanted to show off, even in his own thoughts. he is awful at being honest to himself.

post-ch5, we find out that despite everything, jamil does still hold this philosophy, to some extent. he of course shows off his singing and dancing skills enough to be chosen as a main vocalist, and he says he wants to make a name for himself and show various people just how talented he truly is: kalim, his family, the asims and MC, to name a few. yet in the chapter before that, when kalim compliments his singing and dancing, he’s like “i don’t really want to stand out, but…”. which is honestly a little confusing at first because he does want to. i’d probably interpret it as something along the lines of he wants to show off to the people he cares about, but he still wants to keep his head down in general. so i think that to some extent, maybe he actually has internalised that philosophy now. the one time he truly expressed his desire to stand out, it ended in catastrophe for him. he has this tiny seed of doubt within him now, telling him his parents were right all along. but... he’s working past it, and applying himself as and when he’s comfortable doing so.

going back to him being bad at being honest, jamil’s a pretty big tsundere. there’s one person he does regularly receive praise from: kalim. yet despite desperately wanting to be praised, he often gets annoyed at kalim and tells him something like “this isn’t about me right now” or “what does that have to do with anything?”. plus when the praise is coming from kalim, it’s often in the context of kalim praising him to other people - as a servant, he can’t be seen accepting all these compliments, right? he can never be better than kalim. so he has to reject kalim’s praise. when it’s just the two of them alone, though, is when jamil gets embarrassed to the point he has to hide his blush under his hood. given his childhood, chances are that he doesn’t really know how to process being praised. he knows he wants people’s approval, but when he actually gets it, he just short-circuits. it was the same at his birthday celebration; although he wants to be the centre of attention, when it actually happens, he gets all embarrassed and tsun. i was trying not to let my own personal feelings spill in this but oh my god he’s so cute i can’t

next... this isn’t really linked to any previous topic, but i want to talk about jamil’s cooking! jamil cooks all of kalim’s meals, and regularly cooks entire feasts for kalim’s parties, too (as well as being in charge of getting any animals kalim wants to show off, decorating the dorm, making sure everything runs smoothly… you get the idea). his cooking is very good, and he has a lot of technical knowledge about cooking too - azul, whose parents run a restaurant, didn’t know about emulsification, but jamil was able to explain it to him. despite being so good, though, according to his dorm SSR homescreen lines he doesn’t actually like cooking very much. he says the fact that he cooks so much is “just how things turned out”. of course, he could just be being a tsun, but i do feel like he’s being honest with this - what reason does he have to seriously enjoy something he was forced into doing his entire life? However there is evidence that he might enjoy it after all; he’s particularly good at alchemy because of his cooking knowledge, and according to magical archives he’s completely neutral in motivation for both flying and history lessons, but has slightly higher motivation levels for alchemy, indicating that he can’t stop himself from putting a little bit extra effort into that class. i think it can be interpreted either way with the canon info we have currently, but regardless i would not say he’s the cooking fanatic people often depict him as.

also, when jamil cooks, although his cooking is good, visually it’s usually very boring, to the point he and his sister would bicker over it. he has the technical skills to cook good food, but no idea how to present it. similarly, in his fairy gala SR he was told that although he perfectly memorised the dance, it was boring to watch - it looked like he was just executing the routine without any passion behind it. jamil is so emotionally repressed that he has no idea how to express his individuality. even in his bedroom, the only truly personal items he owns are a first aid kit (related to his servant position, not him as a human being) and a stereo + headphones set for dancing. he doesn’t have any other hobbies or interests - he doesn’t even know what people his age do for fun, because he’s never been allowed to think about such things.

dancing is all jamil has that’s not directly related to serving kalim, really - but even that ties into his servant status. although he genuinely enjoys it nowadays and dances by himself for fun, he only picked it up as a hobby because kalim wanted to go to dance practice, and of course jamil had to accompany him. when his flashback after his overblot talks about him deliberately losing to kalim, the story focuses specifically on a dancing competition. which is why it’s honestly so important to jamil’s character that chapter 5 focuses on a singing and dancing competition. jamil finally has the chance not just to show off his skills in general, but his skills at the one thing he’s been allowed to love throughout his life. the one thing where losing to kalim at it hurt so much that it was such a prominent memory for him. when jamil was chosen as a main vocalist, he instinctively tries to say kalim would be better suited for the position, but stops himself and accepts it. it clearly means so much to him that he was chosen for this.

okay i started to scare people with how long this was getting when it was only 50% finished, i think if i write anymore people will actually be concerned for my health so i’ll leave it here. if you read all of this, thank you so much for putting up with my anime boy brainrot for over six full pages! i really.. really like jamil. again, i most certainly do not think his actions should be defended, but god if they’re not fascinating to read about. and i hope i covered the other sides to him well enough, the things that you’d never ordinarily pick up on because so few people talk about him outside of him and kalim as a pair (both platonic scarabia + romantic jamikali, i mean). he has so much depth to him that people don’t see and god i could easily have gone on for another few pages if i wasn’t forcing myself to stop. but please please talk to me if you want to hear more...

yana has treated him so well, jamil stans get too much food if anything but i’m absolutely thriving off it as you can see! thank you for allowing him to exist, yana-sensei!

having said that, i couldn’t stop myself from adding some extra facts about him below. please enjoy.

some fun jamil facts for your soul:

his sister used to bake him cookies on his birthday - specifically, these!

when jamil and kalim went to eat at the cafeteria with ruggie and leona, leona took one look at jamil and went “you look like you’d kill kalim in his sleep”

sebek and jamil find each other’s positions enviable. sebek wishes he could have been by malleus’ side from birth as jamil was with kalim, and jamil just… wishes he served someone he respected as deeply as sebek respects malleus (but he does think sebek is too enthusiastic)

jamil hates surprises with a burning passion, and despite being with kalim for 17 years is still not used to them. for his previous birthday, kalim held a huge surprise party, and i think he still hasn’t recovered from the shock

i think a lot of people already know that in his birthday SSR story he said he wanted a parrot after graduation so he could teach it to call him master, but it goes a bit further than that? it was actually first mentioned during his lesson chats, when kalim gets a parrot. jamil has to research how to care for it, and ended up wanting one of his own afterwards (but got too tsundere to admit it at the time).

also, he heard that the sorcerer of the sands’ parrot (iago) could speak as fluently as a human, and he got excited and watched a bunch of parrot videos on magicam, but was of course disappointed to find out that this was not the case.

he frequently uses flattery to try and get his way, like when he attempts to flatter vil during his SSR story - unfortunately he misjudged vil, as vil’s actually the type of person who hates meaningless flattery. because he does this so frequently, when he genuinely does give compliments people don’t always believe him.

according to the halloween event, jamil is surprisingly environmentally conscious, and insists on holding a sustainable halloween theme. after organising so many parties and seeing the waste they probably produce, i think there’s no wonder he’s so concerned about it.

#twisted wonderland #jamil viper #twst jamil #scarabia #twst #kalim al-asim #twst kalim #i'm a busy uni student so don't expect the kalim essay to be finished anytime soon #i procrastinated way too much writing the jamil one #and i would not do the same for kalim ajdfjshsjhs #also i know people have said they'd like to see my take on other charas but please consider:#the only reason i have this deep an insight into jamil's character is bc i never think about the others #there's only jamil in my head #so i don't think i'm the best person to go to for interesting analysis about anyone else #but again who knows #tw: abuse

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midnight-moonlight-and-mars · 3 years

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Beyond Wayward Part 1 (Reuploaded)

A/N: Had to reupload this because Tumblr especially hates me. If I had made any revisions off the cuff after retyping it on here they're gone. Please give some love though! Reblogs and comments are appreciated!

Y/n hated the rain. The chill of every drop, the gray overcast skies. When Y/n was younger it always seemed so inconvenient and intolerable. The rain never meant good things for her for as long as she could remember. So it was no surprise that it happened to rain on Y/n’s wedding day, as well as the entire week before.

Wedding dresses can be a challenge when walking in the rain. Especially when you’re not wearing shoes… and walking on asphalt. It gets ten times heavier and one hundred times dirtier.

Y/n lost track of how long she had been walking, and the pain in her legs and feet was starting to get to her. She didn’t know whether not being able to feel anything below the waist was a bad or good thing but either way she would keep walking. She had to figure something out eventually.

The further Y/n walked the quieter and more sparse the roads got. The trees lining the roads became taller and darker with every step she took. The few cars that passed her faded into gray curtains of rain in the distance. A part of her wished it was him looking for her, or one of her coworkers, but like the rest of the world they moved on. Why can’t she? It was at this moment reality had officially set in. She was alone…

Y/n came upon a bridge she used to venture to as a child when she had a lot on her mind. It seems fitting since she could barely hear herself think. The minute she reached the arc of the bridge and looked over the rails to water gushing below, she uncontrollably sobbed for what seemed forever.

She had been fooled and played by the one person she thought she could count on. The foundation of who she was meant to be and hopes of living a life she wanted fell through her hands. Just like the rain did. Y/n's life as she knew it was over.

She grabbed the wooden railings of the bridge and took a deep breath. It was hard to stay focused with the way her body was shaking. Wiping away the tears, rain, and hair sticking to her face Y/n pulled herself on top of the railing.

For a moment she sat there and tilted her head back. She let the rain pour down the sides of her face and took in the ambiance of the woodland scenery. The way the waves of rain hit the leaves on the trees, the smell of pine and earthly decay was soothing. Keeping that focus she slowly leaned forward and loosened her grip she had the ledge. Just another second and it will all be over…

Suddenly, an otherworldly screech bellowed in the distance. At first, Y/n dismissed it. There was no way that was real. Then once again it echoed just beyond the trees and sounded much closer this time. Jumping down from the railing she looked to see where it was coming from but the rain made it impossible to see anything.

Seconds later a shadow appears in the distance. It seemed to be heading right towards Y/n. Instinctively she slowly backed away before she turned to run. Whatever it was it picked up quite a bit of speed. What the hell was this thing?? Why was it chasing her??

Zig-zagging through the trees and navigating the slippery and uneven terrain only slowed down Y/n’s escape from the monster. The rain and cold air hitting her legs made it nearly impossible. Not to mention she was still in a wet wedding dress with no shoes. The longer Y/n went, the more numb her legs became.

Spotting a clearing to her left, she made a sharp turn narrowly escaping a fatal swipe from the monster’s claws. Just as she was about to reach it the creature had snatched the end of her wedding dress, causing her to crash face forward into the dirt.

Turning over, Y/n was face to face with her pursuer. The creature let out another screech before stretching its arms towards her. The monster’s cold and bony hands snaked around her throat and squeezed as it held her face closer to its own.

Its translucent skin combined with rotting teeth painted a horrific picture. The monster's eyes were nothing but a void sucking the life out of her. The otherworldly noise that came out of its mouth was enough to make Y/n retch.

Grabbing the nearest object Y/n swung at its head and kicked it in the chest before knocking it back, but only slightly. She tore off the ends of her dress the monster was holding giving her a small headstart as she scrambled towards the open field. As soon as she reached the tree line a black car had appeared out of nowhere and driven right between her and the monster.

The vehicle made a screeching stop as two people swung open its doors and began firing shotguns at the monster. It put up a fight with its ear-piercing screech and a swing of its monstrous claws, but the guns seemed to slow it down. The moment it fell to the ground, one of them took some sort of rod through the monster’s chest causing it to dissipate into dust and ash.

Y/n stood frozen trying to comprehend what just happened. She didn’t know if it was fear or the freezing rain that inhibited her to move properly, but what she did know is that this had to be the worst day of her life.

The two mysterious strangers seemed to take notice of Y/n now that the monster was gone. Y/n tried to call towards them but a shock wave of pain surged through her entire body. Looking down at her leg she noticed a large stream of blood coming from her thigh.

Now that her adrenaline had subsided and the rain began to calm, her body was now able to feel every ounce of pain and work it had put up with for hours. Between the gushing blood and the pain, Y/n collapsed.

The weight of the world seemed to close in finally. Her eyelids felt heavy and the rest of her body was limp. Before Y/n lost consciousness entirely, she felt someone’s arms lift her off the ground. She felt the warmth of their body against the cold of hers. Voices clouded around Y/n trying to talk to her, but Y/n could barely make out a single word. All she could hear was the car engine before everything went black.

Part 2!

#supernatural #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester #dean x reader #supernatural imagine #sam winchester #castiel #supernatural au

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fandom-monium · 3 years

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In Your Eyes - Episode 1

Soulmates - Heterochromatic Eyes AU: In which the soulmate system isn’t everything it seems and Shouto could be the only one who sees it.

Tags/Warnings: soulmate AU, friends to enemies to friends to lovers trope, Shouto Todoroki x GenderNeutral!Reader

AN: Fuck you, Tumblr, for glitching out my entire masterlist and every piece of work I’ve made over the years. Here’s the reupload. I hope the new gen enjoys this, and if you’re an old reader who liked my works in the past, I hope you enjoy the nostalgia?

A soulmate is a person who is ideally suited to another as a close friend or romantic partner. Your other half, the person that completed you, made you better, and understood you like no one else. It’s rare to find your soulmate. There’s billions of people in this world, so what’s the possibility you’d find yours?

The chances are you won’t. Although, it’s not impossible. There’s people who have had significant others even without finding their fated other half, but the yearning to find their soulmate has never faded.

Centuries ago, the gods were fed up by the pain put on mankind often caused by futile searches. One god and/or goddess (because we don’t discriminate) in particular decided to deal with the problem.

Thus, heterochromatic eyes became the solution. At birth, people receive two different colored eyes, the right yours and the other your soulmate’s. Upon meeting your soulmate’s eyes for the first time, your soulmate eye will return so that your eyes will match. The god made this system to assist mankind with finding their soulmate. To find true love. To find happiness.

However, that was a matter of opinion.

Todoroki Shouto doesn’t know about soulmates till he is 5. His mother is in the midst of comforting him again after a rather intense training session with his father. His small, beaten body curls at his mother’s lap. He sobs in pain and fear, tears staining her pants. She doesn’t mind. She’s more focused on trying to comfort her youngest son. Shouto’s mother presses her lips together, trying to contain her own tears, trying to be strong for him.

“I hate him, Mommy,” Shouto hiccups. It wracks his whole body. “I don’t want to be like him.”

It’s not unusual for his mother and him to end up like this, Shouto at his mother’s lap and her comforting him. It’s become a routine since he started training. But this time seems to last longer than most. The same comfort routine doesn’t work. He still cries and he hugs his mother close, burying his face into her stomach.

Shouto’s mother doesn’t know what to do but tries to stay calm. She pats his back softly, whispering sweet nothings into his ear. How else can she comfort her child?

Then she gets an idea.

“Shouto, have I ever told you about soulmates?” Shouto’s mother asks gently. She’s afraid a single word might shatter the boy.

For a second, Shouto pauses, his arms still wrapped around her waist. She takes it as a sign to continue.

“Do you know what soulmates are?”

He shakes his head into her stomach.

“Well, come out and I’ll tell you.”

And it works. Miraculously, Shouto stops crying and the tears are left forgotten. Instead he watches his mother, mesmerized as she tells him how their world works, of soulmates and how they would bring each other happiness, and fairy tales involving searches for soulmates, fights about soulmates, and other interesting tales.

The idea of happiness gives Shouto hope. He doesn’t notice as his mother gives him a strained smile.

After all, they are just fairy tales, and only fairy tales have a happy ending.

……..

Todoroki Shouto is 6 when he realizes he might not have a soulmate. It happens late at night when he wakes up to go to the bathroom. Once he finishes washing his hands, Shouto stares into his eyes on the bathroom mirror. He smiles tiredly. He’s still hopeful that he’ll one day meet his soulmate. Then he remembers his mother’s words.

“People are born with heterochromatic eyes, that means different colored eyes. The right eye’s their own eye color and the other their soulmate’s. And when they meet their soulmate’s eyes for the first time, their soulmate eyes will switch so that they become the same color.” His eyes widen in shock and his smile drops.

Between training with his father and being with his mother, he never took the time to notice his eyes. They aren’t different colors. They are the same.

At this, he rushes out of the bathroom to search for his mother. Why are his eyes the same color? Did he meet his soulmate already? Or did his mother make a mistake?

Shouto finds his mother in the kitchen. She’s talking on the phone, and he waits at the door to see if she’ll end the call. Her voice trembles as she speaks, “Mom, I know it’s not right, but I can’t do it anymore. They’re like him more and more everyday. And Shouto,” This catches his attention. “His left side, sometimes I look at him and hate what I see.”

What?

His mother’s figure shakes, closer to her breaking point. “I can’t raise him anymore. I shouldn’t raise him.”

“Mommy?” Shouto calls out.

His mother jolts in surprise before turning to him, her eyes dilated.

She’s not the same is his last thought, and he realizes his mistake.

Then everything burns, and Shouto doesn’t get the chance to ask about his eyes.

……..

Todoroki Shouto is forced to grow up when he concludes that soulmates are a hindrance. A pain. Up till the young age of 6, he only knew that soulmates were supposed to make each other happy. That’s what his mother tells him. He believes her.

Shouto was so focused on imagining his soulmate that he never thought to ask. If Father was her soulmate, why wasn’t she happy with him?

It isn’t until his mother is taken away when he realizes how broken the soulmate system is. Shouto despises it. Loathes it. He hates it almost as much as he hates his father. He remembers his mother every time he reminds himself why. He thinks about people like his mother who are stuck with people like his father, thinks about people who don’t want their soulmate, and people who choose someone else over their soulmate.

Shouto thinks about how there’s no choice. How happiness is not guaranteed.

Shouto knows that it doesn’t apply to everyone. There are many people who happily live with their soulmate. But he can’t help feeling jealous for those who are lucky enough to be matched with good people. People who can make each other happy.

……..

Todoroki Shouto is 10 when he accepts that he doesn’t have a soulmate. Since his mother was taken, he doesn’t think about soulmates a lot. He’s endured 4-5 years of training with his father. Forgotten what it feels like to be comforted by a mother. His brothers and especially his sister, Fuyumi, do what they can for him, but it’s not the same. Because of his father, Shouto is mostly separated from them. His father went so far as to put him in a different, more prestigious school in order to achieve his goal.

In his darkest times when only silence is there for him, Shouto tries to distract himself. Whether with training or something else productive to keep his mind occupied. He doesn’t care. He can’t stand doing nothing. He dislikes when he daydreams. He’s afraid it might give him false hope. But sometimes he stares in the mirror and finds himself wondering about his soulmate. What would it be like to meet them? Would they think his scar is ugly? Maybe-

Then Shouto looks at his eyes and remembers. They’re not heterochromatic. Not like his brothers’ or sister’s or everyone else in the world. They’re the same color. But strangely, his eyes aren’t the same color as his parents. Not a warm gray like his mother’s or a cold blue like his father’s. That part leaves him curious. None of his closest relatives have (eye color) eyes either as far as he knows.

When his brothers are out (if they’re around, they’ll tease him till he freezes them) and it’s only his sister at home, Shouto finally asks about his eyes and what they mean.

“Why are they the same color?”

Fuyumi’s eyes widen and she nearly drops the dish she’s washing. “What?”

“Why are my eyes the same color? Shouto asks again, a bit impatiently. He’s wanted a reasonable answer since he was younger. Fuyumi is smart. He figures she could at least give him one.

“I didn’t think you even cared about soulmates,” Fuyumi stops what she’s doing, turning to give him her full attention. “Why the sudden interest?”

“It’s clear that I haven’t met my soulmate, yet my eyes are both (eye color). M-” Shouto catches himself before he continues. “-I was told that everyone is born with heterochromatic eyes till they meet their soulmate. So… why?”

For a moment, Fuyumi stares at him in surprise. She’s never seen Shouto show interest in anything else except maybe training or studying. She asks, “Shouto, what do you know about soulmates?”

Shouto blinks, more impatient now that she’s answered his question with a question. “I know that everyone is born with heterochromatic eyes till they meet their soulmate, and when you meet them your eye color switches so they become the same,” he states robotically. He doesn’t add that they supposedly bring each other happiness.

He knows that’s not true.

“Well, not exactly. Not everyone is born with heterochromatic eyes,” Fuyumi answers. “It’s true that most are born with them, but there are the rare few who aren’t. I don’t know much, but I’ve heard that those who aren’t born with heterochromatic eyes don’t have soulmates. In my opinion, I think it’s a sign. A sign that they aren’t tied down by the soulmate system, by the gods, or the universe. A sign they’re free to make their own choice.”

Shouto says nothing. Then he thanks his older sister for her answer and leaves silently, contemplating.

Shouto doesn’t worry about his eyes after that. He used to when he was younger. He would fret about not having a soulmate. Now he feels slightly relieved.

He isn’t tied down to someone he might not even like.

……..

Todoroki Shouto is now 16 and has long forgotten about soulmates. Well, not entirely. He knows they exist and knows the soulmate system is broken, but he stops caring. Enduring 10-11 years of training with his father, Shouto is completely focused on rebelling against him and surpassing All Might. Nothing more, nothing less.

When he first becomes acquainted with his classmates, one of the first questions he gets is, why are your eyes the same color? Or, you met your soulmate already? His classmates aren’t the first to ask this personal question. Many others have asked. He gives the same answer every time.

“I don’t have one.”

The reaction varies depending on the person, but he’s used to it. People like Yaoyorozu Momo and Kirishima Eijiro politely apologize for prying. People like Uraraka Ochako and Midoriya Izuku nod in understanding, minding their own business. Then people like Bakugou Katsuki and Minoru Mineta have the audacity to laugh in his face because even they have soulmates.

(Shouto pities whoever’s stuck with them. He wonders how their soulmates could tolerate those two.)

Shouto isn’t mad or anything. His expression remains neutral, unfazed. None of that bothers him. Not anymore. Most are naturally curious and polite about it. He shouldn’t be angry at them. But when he sees the pity in their eyes, it makes him want to give frostbite and third degree burns as a reply instead.

He doesn’t need pity. He doesn’t need a soulmate. He’s done just fine on his own.

However, the topic of soulmates is popular. Unavoidable. Other Yuuei students, mostly girls for some reason, come up and ask him if he’s met his soulmate because of his eyes. He gives them the same answer.

“I don’t have one,” he replies.

“I don’t have one,” he clenches his fist.

“I don’t have one,” he says through gritted teeth.

Shouto gets tired of it and eventually stops answering the question. He hopes someone would spread a rumor or something for him.

Shouto sits at the lunch table eating his cold Soba with his friends. The word soulmate pops up again and he sighs, blocking out the conversation. Why is everyone so obsessed with soulmates? Can’t they see that the soulmate system wasn’t everything to life? He glances at his friends. They chatter amongst themselves as they talk about their soulmates and such. Then he looks away and focuses on eating his Soba.

They don’t mean to exclude him from the conversation. He knows that. They’re just trying to spare his feelings.

Shouto is surrounded by his friends and classmates, but he can’t help feel lonely.

……..

Todoroki Shouto is still 16 when he finally encounters his soulmate. He doesn’t know it but he does. It’s just before the Hero License Acquisition Exam. Class 1-A arrives at the national stadium in Takoba where they’ll be taking the exam, the atmosphere thick with teenage anxiety. It’s clear the students are nervous, but it fades into resolve as Aizawa finishes giving them a pep talk.

“Awesome. c'mon everybody, let’s go hatch into chicks!” Kirishima cheers, “Let’s hit out of the park like always!”

His loud, ecstatic voice catches the attention of others.

“Say it with me now, Plus…” No one notices the broad figure coming up behind him. “Ultra!”

“ULTRA!”

Everyone flinches in surprise before they turn to see a tall boy with a buzz cut standing behind Kirishima. The boy grins widely, adorning a school uniform and a signature cap.

Seeing his face, Shouto feels a spark of recognition but doesn’t react. He assumes he’ll remember him at some point.

“Don’t go crashing the circles of outsiders without invitation, Inasa,” a boy behind Inasa scolds.

“Ah, you’re right, please accept-” Inasa leans back “-my sincerest-” and throws himself forward. His skulls meets the ground with a crack. “-apologies!”

This guy is doing the lowest bow Shouto has ever seen. He doesn’t like it. It reminds him of Iida and Kirishima combined.

The chatter among the surrounding students increase as they realize that the students before Yuuei are Shiketsu Academy freshman.

“I’ve always wanted to say it at least once! ‘Plus Ultra’! I love Yuuei Academy! ” Inasa exclaims politely, standing again. “It’s such a pleasure, the highest honor, to be able to compete against Yuuei!”

“Ah, you’re bleeding,” a Shiketsu girl notes as the scrapes on his forehead well with blood, trickling down his face.

“Let’s go,” The boy who scolded Inasa begins walking to the stadium entrance. They follow without complaint.

Shouto hears from Midoriya that Inasa had the top qualification for the recommended spots, but he stops listening. Instead, he watches Inasa, his back turned to them now. Why does his face seem so familiar? He can’t remember and it annoys him.

Then someone walks up to Inasa in the same uniform as the rest of Shiketsu Academy.

Something about you pulls at Shouto’s heartstrings almost painfully. His eyes widen, pupils dilating.

Walking up to Inasa, your voice is calm as you begin to scold him. “Inasa, you should be more careful. I get you’re hot-blooded and all, but you need to chill. You get hurt over the littlest things.” You sigh, pulling out bandages and antiseptic from your bag. You begin to tend to his wounds before reaching the stadium.

“Sorry, (Last Name)-san. I’ll try to be more careful,” Inasa promises. He pats your head, grinning wider.

You swat his hand away and frown. “Don’t try. You will be more careful and stop being so extra all the time. Seriously, I can’t keep patching you up for dumb things like bowing.”

Your eyes don’t meet. Hell, you didn’t even look at him, but the way his heart pounds like a drum says it all. Heat creeps up his neck slowly. His heartstrings feel like they’re being pulled and he almost groans as his chest aches, but it’s unlike any time he’s been injured. It’s more urgent.

Shouto decides he doesn’t like you.

So, I decided to try my hand at the downside of the soulmate system (because I’m tired of the bright side). Hope you enjoy the first episode of my soulmate au.

Splitting it into a few parts, not gonna be long though. May become a mini series?

Episode 2 available in Masterlist

Got any requests or suggestions? Ask box is open.

#shouto todoroki #todoroki shouto x reader #shouto todoroki x reader #shoto todoroki x reader #todoroki shoto x reader #todoroki shouto #todoroki shoto #shoto todoroki #bnha #my writing #soulmate alternate universe #soulmate au

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fotiathymos · 4 years

Photo

VULCAN VS LIO DELETED SCENE.

More under cut along with analysis/script. Warning this is a long post!

REUPLOADED CAUSE TUMBLR HATES ME.

(I apologize that the quality of photos changes. It not me its tumblr, I swear!)

Script recap of scene: (takes place right after the Burnish are freed from prison, this is an extension to that scene. It takes place right before the lake scene with Aina and Galo.)

START OF SCRIPT TRANSCRIPT

EXT. INNER COURTYARD

All the gaurds can’t move either from the fire walls or being frozen.

The captured Burnish get on the fireproof helicopter.

Gueira sits in the cockpit. Lio is instructing.

LIO: Okay, go.

The helicopter takes off.

*SUBURB, SKY

The fireproof helicopter is flying with Lio’s group in it.

Three fighter jets are pursuing them.

It is Vulcan leading the Freeze Force in their tactical aircrafts.

Gueira notices them.

GUEIRA: Boss, we got someone on our tail.

LIO: Must be Freeze Force.

VULCAN: You never know when to give up, Burnish!

The tactical aircrafts are in range to shoot.

VULCAN: You can’t shake us off at that speed.

Vulcan locks on. He fires freezing missiles.

Then, the entire helicopter is enveloped in flames. It melts the ice on the freezing missiles. Lio’s flames had enveloped the helicopter.

VULCAN: What?!

Then, the back of the burning helicopter emits flames with great force. It increases the speed of the helicopter.

VULCAN: Tch!

Vulcan’s three jets also increase speed. Then, the helicopter shoots a fiery shell. It’s aiming for Subordinate 1′s jet.

SUBORDINATE 1: Damn it!

He barely dodges. But the firery shell changes direction and pierces the aircraft.

Subordinate 1 ejects. His parachute opens.

VULCAN: What?!

It turns out the fiery shell was Lio. Lio is enveloped by a fiery ball, emitting flames like a jet, flying.

While Lio is dealing with the jets, the helicopter escapes.

VULCAN: He can fly?

Flames come out of fiery Lio’s arms, becoming swords. They slice Subordinate 2′s fighter jet into two.

SUBORDINATE 2: Aaaghh!

Subordinate 2 ejects.

VULCAN: He’s evolved that much, eh?

Lio pulls the canopy off of Vulcan’s jet.

LIO: Tell the governor the Burnish are free. We won’t let you and the Foundation do as you please. I’m taking back my comrades who were hurt.

VULCAN: Did you get caught on purpose?

LIO: Thanks for the help.

Lio flies away.

VULCAN: Come back here!

Just when Vulcan tries to increase speed, the fiery ball at the injection port explodes. It destroys the injection port. Lio had placed it there.

VULCAN: Damn it!

Vulcan ejects as well. He descends in his parachute.

VULCAN: That kid better not get too cocky.

His expression is a bit sly.

END SCRIPT TRANSCRIPT

( Yes I did type and copy that all out from the book .-. )

If you did not notice. Both scenes are Vulcan vs Lio but one is in the air entirely and the other on the ground mostly.

I’ll semi-describe the storyboard scene.

-----

The Burnish are exiting the prison when spot lights shine directly on Lio. An armored vehicle comes crashing through the halls and out the exit, headed straight for the Burnish. Lio runs straight for it.

Vulcan is driving the vehicle. It has a claw attached to the front. The claw raises, prepared to grab Lio. Lio doesn’t stop running straight to the moving vehicle. Right before the claw clamps down, Lio jumps up. Lio flies up into the air. Vulcan seems startled and the vehicles wheels flatten and stop from moving. The flatten wheels bring the vehicle up into the air after Lio.

Fire balls seem to shoot at the vehicle’s front claw. Blinding the veiw of Vulcan. Vulcan looks up from a sky roof in the vehicle only to see Lio skyrocketing above him and then coming straight back down with several firey attacks. Lio aims for the wheels and busts them.

The vehicle starts to smoke and come crashing down. Vulcan is shown peeking out as he falls with an very angry expression.

Another armored vehicle comes out of the prison door below, seemingly ready to fire at the Burnish still on the ground. Suddenly Vulcan’s vehicle comes crashing into it from the air.

Vulcan grumbling out of the rubble of the two crashed vehicles, suddenly notices Lio. Lio is above them, flying, with a stern look on his face. At this point it mimics the script in which Lio tells Vulcan, “ Tell the governor the Burnish are free. We won’t let you and the Foundation do as you please. I’m taking back my comrades who were hurt. “

It then shows a helicopter flying away from the prison, most likely the Burnish rescued. Vulcan grumbles more.

-----

SO. Now thoughts. You can stop reading if you just wanted to see the storyboards deleted scene and the scripts deleted scene.

I understand why they took out this scene but it seems they really wanted it to happen. The storyboards are fleshed out much more then some other deleted scenes and they even had it in the script! It would have shown more power and leadership to Lio’s character and really undermine Vulcan. I almost wish it was included cause then Vulcan beating up Lio restlessly after getting him the with freezing bullet later in the movie would’ve complimented his rage towards Lio.

But of’course, it wasn’t vital. It disrupted the flow in a way. And we do get Vulcan fighting Lio many more times. I think Trigger just was being Trigger and wanted cool fight air scene? I don’t have much of a preference between the script’s scene or the storyboarded scene. I almost enjoy the scripts more cause Gueira has more lines/importance. But Meis still doesn't or is even mentioned? (Though according the lore the leadership ranking is Lio > Gueira > Meis.)

The scene gives the rebellion of the Mad Burnish and the movement to free their people more flesh. Lio’s small speech of ‘tell the gov to suck it and also you suck it too’ was just perfect. Also showing more of Lio’s immense power is a plus!

It also seems like Lio being able to fly is a rarity. Another nudge to his power. I was honestly shocked in theatres when I first saw him flying with groceries in hand. They don’t show anyone else flying but they also don’t show any other Burnish attack much besides the Mad Burnish trio. (Not so much counting the Pizza Man since he just kind of blocked with flames more so then attacked)

There is a lot of things left unshown/unexplored with how Burnish flames work. But also if most Burnish are tortured/captured/told to feel shame for their flames.. they probably don’t try to use it much. This is also why I feel Kray had to have had some sort of practice room/area where he burned and used his flames to gain such power to rival Lio. Lio was forced to learn and adapt to his Promare and use its powers for survival of him and his people. Kray had no threats to his life and had to have had some secret evil lair in the earths core just burning pictures of Galo for practice.

I do enjoy they still take note and care in showing that Lio isn't trying to outright kill anyone. Guards are blocked off or frozen with their own guns. Lio has the pilots eject from their seats and land with parachutes.

All in all this scene played out in either way would’ve been highly enjoyed if it was included in the film! But it understandably was cut out. We can’t have everything! If we did well......................... lets not get into that.

I never know how to end these posts so thank you for reading again! My ask box is open for requests to see other storyboard/script scenes! And please share your thoughts! Everyone sees things differently!

SORRY FOR THE REUPLOAD

#promare #promare storyboard #lio vs vulcan #lio fotia #deleted scenes #GROANS REAL LOUD

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waitimcomingtoo · 4 years

Text

Captains Orders (reupload)

Pairing: Peter Parker x Venom!Reader

Synopsis: you go through the process of finding out Peters secret, losing him in the snap, and reuniting with him

authors note: tumblr is giving me all sorts of problems lately and now its not tagging people 🙃sorry if you weren't tagged last time but hopefully this time works

Masterlist

Finding out

“You never know what’s out there. Be ready for anything. That includes an extra pair of underwear in your child’s backpack. Lucky for them, I have my own brand.” Captain America, clad in his old fashioned uniform, held up a pair of underwear on your TV screen. Being as a big of a fan as you were, you tended to leave on his old commercials when they came on.

“I don’t know about the underwear, but I’ll take your advice on being ready for anything.” You smiled as you turned the TV off and climbed out the window that lead to your fire escape.

“Ready?” Venom’s metallic voice filled your ears and you nodded.

“Ready.” You confirmed and jumped off the terrace. You shot a black tendril at a nearby building to anchor yourself as you swung through the streets of New York.

Like you usually did, you encountered Spiderman while you were out on patrol. No matter how many times you explained to him that you only hurt bad guys, he always came after you to try and stop you. In turn, you sent him away with a few broken bones and a couple bruises to keep him at bay. When he approached you on this particular night, you and Venom were in no mood for the usual banter. Venom picked him and and hurled him against a wall before he had a chance to speak.

“Woah woah woah, what did I do? I haven’t even said anything yet.” Spider-mans youthful voice came from behind his mask as he rubbed his head.

“Leave us alone. You have been a thorn in our side since we started patrolling the streets.” Venom growled. “Don’t make us hurt you. We would have no problem crushing a pesky bug.”

“Crushing seems a bit extreme.” Spiderman insisted as he stood up. “Perhaps we could compromise on a simple smush.”

His sarcasm only angered you further, making you charge at him. Spider-Man skillfully slid under you and shot a few webs at your feet, cashing you to fall and roll along the pavement. You angrily ripped his webs off of you, causing Spider-Man to let out a surprised squeak.

“No ones ever broken out of my webs on their own before.” He gulped.

“No one gonna get through chance again.” You threatened as you lunged towards him. As much as you hated to admit it, Spiderman always put up a good fight. For every time you threw him against a building and knocked the wind out of him, he got in a few punches or wiped you off your feet. Growing tired of the nightly routine you had with him, you decided tonight was the last time. You shot a tendril at Spiderman, pulling him towards you at full speed and punching him in the face when he got close enough. This disoriented him enough where you could grab him by the neck and hold him up, grinning wickedly as he struggled to breathe.

You pulled his mask off at the same time he yanked Venom off of you. You immediately looked to Venom, who was laying on the floor, unharmed. You only looked back at Spiderman when you heard him making gawking sounds. Your eyes traveled up his red and blue suit until they landed on the face of your best friend. His jaw was dropped and eyes wide, and your face quickly did the same. You both pointed a finger at each other and froze, now knowing what to do or when. Venom crawled to you and bonded with you but stayed inside as you stared at Peter. Finally, you broke out into a laugh.

“Yo!” You laughed in happy surprise.

“Dude, no way.” Peter looked you up and down, unable to process what he was seeing.

“You’re Spider-Man? The Spider-Man?” You whispered so it wouldn’t catch anyone’s unwanted attention.

“And I take it you’re Venom?” Peter said as he nodded.

“We’re Venom, but yes.” You corrected as Venom rested on your shoulder. “What are the odds?”

“This has never happened before. There are no odds!” Peter exclaimed.

“I can’t believe I’ve been beating the life out of my best friend every night and I had no idea.” You scratched your head in amazement, suddenly feeling guilty about all the bruises and scratches you’d seen on Peter that you now knew you gave him.

“I can’t believe it either.” Peter remarked “Especially since you still ask me to open jars for you.”

“Venom can open jars. I can’t.” You informed him.

“So you’re two different people?” He tilted his head to the side.

“Yes, in one body. Two minds, two personalities.” You listed.

“One love.” Venom spoke up.

“Okay, Venom.” You laughed and patted her head. “What about you? If you have all these crazy abilities, why aren’t you the captain of every sports team by now? You’d crush all those meat heads.”

“If I couldn’t play those sports before I was bitten, I can’t play them after. It’s not fair to everyone else.” Peter told you his philosophy.

“Bitten?” You asked.

“Radioactive spider.” He confirmed. “And you?”

“Symbiote from another planet.” You pointed to the sky.

“Symbiote? So you guys are a host and parasite situation?” Peter couldn’t keep from geeking out a little.

“We don’t like that word. We call it a buddy system. Cause we’re buddies.” You shrugged with a happy smile.

Infinity War

You were at home, eating a big bowl of Cheerio and getting left on delivered by Peter when a rather large space ship pulled up to your window. You dropped your spoon into your bowl in shock and stopped chewing as a bridge extended from the ship onto your fire escape.

“Hey space balls, think you can do something for me?” Tonys voice came from the ship, though you didn’t see anyone inside except a pilot.

“Yeah, sure.” You nodded slowly. “What is it?”

“I need you to help me with something. Get on the ship. And bring your little monster friend.” Tony continued. You swallowed your mouthful of Cheerios and blinked a few times to snap back into focus.

“Sir, I can’t get on that ship.” You said apologetically.

“Why not?” Tony asked.

“Stranger danger.” You said weakly.

“Listen Space Jam, there is a much more imminent danger at hand than the stranger steering the jet. Get on it, or die. Simple really.” Tony quipped.

“Okay.” You nodded confidently and got up. “Should I bring a jacket or-“

“Get on the jet!” He interrupted.

“All right! I’m going, I’m going.” You blew out a nervous breath and walked onto your fire escape. The jet was hovering outside your terrace and you contemplated what to do. Mr. Stark needed you, yes. But you were not equipped to fight the battles he was typically caught in. You could let him down in a big way if you went, and a bigger way if you stayed. The TV caught your attention and you saw one of Captain America’s informercials playing. They were usually dumb and pandered mostly to kids, but you admired him and often found yourself tuning in to what he was saying.

“Go out there and be brave.” Captain America saluted on your screen. Your face lit up in a smile and you stood up straighter.

“Captains orders.” You saluted the TV and ran to board the jet.

Wakanda

The space dog stalked up to Cap, pinning him against a tree with nowhere to go. When the dog was about to pounce, Cap put his arms over his face to protect himself. Just when the dog was about to get to him, you dropped down it front of him. You punched the dog out of the way and turned to asses Cap.

“Hey, you okay?” You asked. Before he could answer, another dog came running at you. You shot a black tendril at a tree, yanked it from the ground, and used it as a bat to ward off the remaining dogs. Once the area was clear, you turned to Steve and pushed him higher against the tree for support. You shot a web at his shield and handed it to him as he watched in admirable confusion.

“Yeah, just locked the wind out of me. Where’d you come from?” He asked as he looked you up and down, not recognizing the giant white spider symbol on your suit.

“Mr. Stark sent for us and flew us down here. We haven’t fought too many people before but he thought we could help.” You explained as you pressed a firm palm against the gash on his thigh, covering the wound with your black goo. When you took your hand away, the gash was gone. Steve watched you in awe as you did the same to other cuts of his.

“Right.” He nodded as he began to watch your face instead.

“Have you seen my friend Peter? He’s my age and kinda short, but if you ask him he’ll tell you he’s average height and I’m like yeah, average height of a woman.” You nervously talked as you healed a cut on Steve’s forehead. “He was supposed to text me when he got to MOMA but he never did.”

“I haven’t seen him.” Cap shook his head, watching you heal a scrape on his elbow.

“Shoot. He better not be here. It’s not safe.” You fretted as you looked up and saw the raging battle all around you. “If you’re okay to keep fighting, we’re gonna go find him.” You looked him over to make sure he was okay to leave.

“You can’t go alone. Thanos will be here any minute. You should stick by me if you’re an inexperienced fighter.” Cap insisted, grabbing your arm so you wouldn’t leave.

“Trust me Captain, I’m never alone.” You smiled gratefully at him for showing concern for you.

“Who are you?” Steve asked in wonder, still not having figured it out.

“Well, my name is Y/n, but we,” you said before turning around and catching an alien about to attack, throwing it across the woods, “we are Venom.”

You turned up to leave, only getting a few paces away before you heard his voice.

“Hey.” Steve shouted after you. You turned to look at him and he smirked.

“You mind giving me a ride?” He asked.

“Hop on.” You smiled. You turned into Venom and let Cap climb on to your back.

“Run as fast as you can.” He commanded.

“Captains orders.” You said as you took off towards the battlefield.

In the battle

You and Venom were punching as many space dogs as you could when a large axe landed a few feet away from you. You went to pick it up to swing it at the dogs, but found it impossibly heavy and unable to be moved.

“Why can’t I lift this?” You called out as you tugged on the handle. Thor ran up to you and picked up the axe with ease, using it to send a wave of lighting towards the advancing group of dogs.

“Because you’re not worthy.” Thor said smugly as he cut an alien in half.

“Why am I not worthy?” You asked as you punched a space dog and sent it flying. “Because I eat people?”

“You eat people?” Steve and Thor said in unison, making your face redden in embarrassment.

Endgame

You sat next to Scott as Steve and Tony argued, quietly looking around to admire the cabin he had moved in to. Peters face flashed among the ones lost in the snap, making you grimace and wipe a stray tear.

“We gotta do this, Tony. I lost Bucky.” You heard Steve plead.

“Who the hell is Bonkey?” You whispered to Scott.

“Some girl I think.” Scott whispered back as he munched on a pop tart. He saw the distraught look on your face as you stared at the montage of people dusted and offered you half of it.

“No. Not happening. It’s over. We lost. I gotta shave.” Tony shut down Steve’s idea of looking for Thanos.

“Please Mr. Stark.” You stood up and everyone looked at you. Your legs trembled as you walked towards your mentor. “Please. We’re the only people with the power to fix this. How can we not?”

“Look, Rocky Horror, I’d love to bring everyone back as much as the next guy. But there is no protocol for this. We have no idea what could happen if we snapped again.” Tony reasoned with you.

“But we know exactly what will happen if we don’t.” You countered. You and Tony stared at each other for a moment. He couldn’t deny that every time he looked at you, he saw the empty space by your side that Peter used to take up. He looked at his feet and sighed.

“Give me five days. If you don’t hear from me, the Time Jinx-“ Tony began.

“Time Heist.” Scott corrected.

“Time to go Eff yourself.” Tony snapped. “If you don’t hear from me, it’s off. Sound fair?”

“Thank you.” You nodded and ran to him to hug him. “Thank you so much.”

“Thanks for sticking up for me back there.” Steve looked at you in the rear view mirror as you drove home from Tony’s cabin.

“I can’t say it wasn’t for selfish reasons.” You shrugged. “I need people back too. For the first time in my life, I’m all alone.”

“Who are you doing this for?” Steve asked you.

“Peter Parker. My best friend in the whole world.” You smiled sadly. You did your best not to think about the fact that he was gone.

“I’m doing this for my best friend too.” Steve told you with a kind smile.

“Right. Bucket.” You remembered.

“Bucky.” He corrected.

“Bucky.” You repeated.

The snap

“I have to do it.” You interrupted the argument over who would be the one to snap after being quiet since Clint broke the news about Nat. “It has to be me.”

“Not now, the adults are talking.” Tony tried to dismiss you but you didn’t let him.

“I’m serious. I lost Venom in the last snap. That means I’m the only one hear who isn’t enhanced in some way. That makes me expendable.”

“No. It’s going to be me.” Thor shook his head.

“Wrong, Lebowski. It’s going to be me.” Tony told him.

“It can’t be either of you.” You insisted. “If Thor does it and dies, we lose our best fighter. If Mr. Stark does it and dies, we lose Iron Man and the only person here who can make another gauntlet. It has to be me.”

“No.” Tony said firmly. “I’m not about to let a child kill herself for this.”

“Nat just gave her life for this.” You raised your voice at him. “Are we gonna come this far to only come this far? You know I’m right. You know I’m expendable. It has to be me.”

“We don’t trade lives.” Steve said, looking at you with his Steele blue eyes from across the room.

“We don’t have the luxury of morals right now.” You told him. “Trillions of people died. You can afford to lose one more to bring the rest back.”

“No.” Tony snapped. “It’s out of the-“

“Let her do it.” Thor cut him off.

“What?” Tony looked at him with anger.

“She’s right, Stark.” Thor said solemnly. “It’s a horrible fate but it’s true. When Thanos comes, and he will, we’re gonna need every fighter we have. It has to be her.”

Tony stared at him for a long time before his face softened as he realized he was right. Without looking at you, he handed you the gauntlet. You gingerly took it, your heart racing as everyone took precautions, stepping away from you and putting shields up. You looked to Steve for comfort and he gave you a somber salute.

“You better come back from this.” He told you with a pleading look in his eyes. You smiled softly at him and saluted.

“Captains orders.”

Thanos comes to earth

Right as you got out from under the rubble of the Avengers tower you saw Thanos beating up Steve. His shield was in pieces so you grabbed the nearest item to you and ran to his aid. You stepped between him and Thanos and planted your feet.

“Don’t touch him!” You cried as you swung a baseball bat in front of you.

“Is that a baseball bat? Did you seriously show up to this fight with a baseball bat?” Steve asked from the ground.

“Hello, trying to save your life here.” You shot back at him.

“Sorry. Carry on.” Steve said.

“Give it up.” Thanos sneered. “There’s no use fighting anymore. I’ve done what I had to do and I’ll do it again.”

“No. I will never stop fighting.” You heaved. “You took everything from me. Until there is no air left in my chest, I will never stop fighting.”

One swift kick the head and you were knocked to the ground. You saw stars for a moment rad your head spun. A tall man with long brown hair came into your sight and stood over you.

“Hey, get up.” He held out his hand for you to grab.

“Jesus?!” You gasped, thinking you were dead.

“No.” He sighed as if he got that a lot. “My name is Bucky. You gotta get up.”

“Bonky!” You cheered, grabbing his cold, metal hand and standing up. You immediately heard an explosion to your left and an array of screaming from your right. You and Bucky looked at each other and nodded before running opposite ways towards the sounds.

You ran towards the yelling and looked around for anyone you could help, even though you were still without Venom and pretty much defenseless. Ebony Maw saw you looking vulnerable and floated over to you.

“What’s a pretty thing like you doing in the middle of a battlefield? Don’t you know there’s a war going on?” He said as he approached you.

“Really?” You stopped to ask. “I thought this was a Febreeze commercial.”

“Just for that, I’ve decided to terminate you.” He began to make rocks around you float and threw them at you. You were hit in the arm and began to ran until you were knocked over by a boulder.

“No, wait.” You help up your left arm to protect your face as Ebony piles rocks on you, all with just the flick of his finger. Your right arm was still out of commission after snapping, so you didn’t have much of a defense system. He dropped more rocks onto you until you were gasping for breath and could barely speak.

You could see Cap in the distance, just out of earshot. You opened your mouth to speak, to call out to him, but no words came out. It was like every nightmare you’d had as a kid when you lost your voice and couldn’t cry out for help. Hot tears fell out of the corner of yours eyes in frustration as you tried to scream, yell, talk, anything. Instead of words, blood spilled over your lips, filling your mouth with a metallic taste.

“Help! I need help! Cap!” You tried to scream but it came out as a hushed whisper.

“He’s not coming.” Ebony said as he began to pile rocks closer to your face.

“Cap! Mr. Stark! Please! Can anybody hear me?” You wheezed.

“I’m afraid no one can hear you, my child.” Ebony Maw said as he dropped a rock onto your head, silencing you. “Not anymore.”

He turned around and began to float away when he heard the sound of rocks tumbling and moving. He turned back to where he left you and no longer saw you under the pile. As soon as he turned back around, he was met with Venom towering over him.

“We heard.” Venom snarled before biting Ebonys head clean off.

“Nice work.” Steve’s voice came from behind you and startled you. You turned back into yourself and faced him. “I was just on my way to help you, but it looks like you got it handled.”

“Thanks. I had help, though.” You said and Venom slid into your hand, as if to hold it.

“You find your friend yet?” He asked you.

“Not yet. I met Bucket, by the way.” You said as you brushed some debris off your suit.

“He told me.” Steve smiled. “Go find your guy. I’ll cover you.”

“Captains orders.” You saluted him and turned into Venom before running off.

The reunion

“I got this! I got this! I don’t got this!” Peter realized in fear as space dogs piled onto his faster than he could fight them off. He instinctively threw his hands over his face and curled himself into a ball. Thanks to his high tech iron spider suit, he barely felt the blows from the bad guys. It wasn’t until he felt himself being thrown onto his back that he began to worry. An alien with sword for a hand tilted Peters chin up with the edge of his blade. Peter felt fear rise in his throat, not knowing how to use his suit yet and not being able to put his mask up to protect his neck.

“Help! Someone help!” He shouted, but it fell on deaf ears. No one heard.

“Someone, please! Can anybody hear me?” Peter cried. Like a hand coming down into Peters open grave to pull him out, he heard a voice.

“We got you.”

The alien on top of Peter was knocked off in a blur of black. Peter scrambled to sit up and looked in the direction of his savior. He tried to catch his breath as he watched Venom ripping the alien to shreds like it was made of paper.

“Venom?” Peter panted, making you snap up to look at Peter. You slowly got off the alien, still in Venom form, and began to run towards Peter. You melted back into yourself as you ran, tears streaming down your face as your legs carried you. Imagine My Tears are Becoming the Sea as you run towards each other. You meet Peter in the middle and throw your good arm around him, tangling your fingers in hair at the back of his head as pressing him as close to you as possible. You dry heaved a few minutes as the scent of your best friends shampoo filled your nostrils for the first time in five years. Hot tears of joy poured from your eyes when you felt him rubbing your back for comfort. You pressed a kiss to his temple, before saying screw it and kissing every inch of his face and neck that you could reach as he laughed. You pulled back and kept your left hand on his face as your right arm hung limply at your side. Your thumb stoked his cheek as you took in your best friends face.

“Is this a trick?” You whispered, searching his face for comfort.

“It’s not a trick.” Peter shook his head with a childish smile, loving all the affection he was getting from you.

“What if it is? What if I wake up and this is just a dream?” Your voice broke. “I can’t take it if it’s fake.”

“It’s not a dream. It’s real. I’m real.” Peter assured you as he took your hand and pressed your fingers against his neck. “You can feel my pulse, yeah?”

“Yeah. I can feel it.” You nodded as you felt the rhythm of his heartbeat under your fingertips.

“Then I’m real.” Peter said gently, making your lip tremble and rendering you unable to speak.

“What happened to your arm?” Peter asked when he caught sight of your right arm, still red and sizzling from the snap.

“Oh, um…dragons.” You said the first lie that came to your head. “It was a fire breathing dragon.”

“Wow, really?” Peter looked at you in amazement. “Did it hurt?”

You broke into a smile at seeing your best friend excited again after so many years of not seeing him at all. His eyes lit up just like you remembered.

“No. It didn’t hurt.” You lied through a genuine smile. “I’m all right.”

“I missed you, Y/n.” Peter said suddenly. “It’s only been a few hours for me, but I missed you.”

“I missed you too.” You said through your tears.

“I had a few hours to think when I was in the soul stone and ran out of questions to ask Dr. Strange.” Peter began, looking nervous for the first time. “I think we’ve been wasting a lot of time.”

“What do you mean?” You asked him.

“I love you.” Peter said firmly. “I have for years. For whatever love is at my age, that’s how I feel. I know I’m 18 and you’re 22, but Knives Chau was 17 and Scott Pilgrim was 23 when they dated so I just-“

You cut Peter off by pulling him into a kiss using your one good hand, feeling a sob rise in the back of your throat when he kissed you back. You pulled away and rested your forehead against his, only feeling him in the middle of a battlefield.

“I love you too.”

Funeral

You stood apart from the crowd after Pepper sent Tony’s memorial into the water, watching from a distance while fumbling with the bottom of your dress. You watched Peter talk with the other Avengers, a newfound sadness in his eyes as he once again put the “e” in “dad”. You sighed as you watched him, feeling a guilt you didn’t know to explain. You told Mr. Stark the snap would kill him, and he did it anyway. Feeling uncomfortably hot all the sudden, you attempted to pull your hair into a ponytail. Ever since your arm had to be amputated from snapping, little tasks like doing your hair seemed impossible. Hot tears of frustration filled your eyes as you struggled to get all your hair into the ponytail. Right as you were about to give up, you felt someone’s hands take the hair tie from you and gather your hair into a ponytail. They secured the hair tie around your hair and stood beside you, all without saying a word.

“Thank you.” You said quietly as you touched the ponytail, surprised to find it was well done.

“It’s all right.” Bucky nodded as he stared off at the lake. “I owe you one.”

“Who told you?” You asked him, feeling a sharp pain where your elbow used to be.

“Someone had to snap their fingers and you’re the only missing an arm. I took a wild guess.” Bucky smiled half heartedly. You folded your lips into a line as the pain worsened in your phantom limb.

“Are you gonna tell anyone?” You asked in a hushed voice. You hadn’t told anyone that you were the one who snapped. It seemed almost insulting to speak of it since the very same action had killed Tony. It made you sick to your stomach to know both of you had snapped but you were the one to survive and attend his funeral.

“I take it seriously when people risk their lives for mine. I’ll keep your secret.” Bucky assured you. You stared at him for a moment as tears filled your eyes until you brushed your sleeve up to look at the remainder of you arm. It had to be taken off right below the shoulder, so all you were left with was an immobile nub. You looked back at Bucky and saw him silently staring at your residual limb with a look of understanding.

“Does it always hurt this bad?” You whispered, never having vocalized your pain from losing your arm before. Bucky sighed sympathetically and slowly looked up at you.

“The pain gets easier with time.” He told you. “Mine still hurts when it rains or snows.”

You nodded at his words and looked at your residual limb again, pain evident on your face. Bucky could see you struggling with your new body and remembered how hard it was for him when he first lost his own arm.

“You think it’s ugly.” He spoke, making you look at him. “I thought my stump was ugly too. It’s not, though. Steve told me what happened before Thanos came back. You snapped thinking you were going die. You risked your life for us, and you haven’t even met most of us.”

“Someone had to do it.” You mumbled, not wanting to take the credit.

“But you made sure that someone was you. I think that’s beautiful.” Bucky shrugged, and a small smile appeared on your face. “So don’t look at it like its ugly. It’s not ugly.”

“Thanks, Buggy.” You said softly, looking at your stump in a new light.

“Bucky.” he corrected.

“Thanks Bucky.” You repeated.

“Well, Steve sent me over here to get you, so I can’t leave empty handed. He wants you to meet the rest of the Avengers.”

You looked at the group Peter was in and let out a nervous breath before looking back at Bucky.

“Okay.” You agreed. “Captains Orders.”

Tag List 🏷

@awesomebooklover17 @maybemona @thebookwormlife @imanativeofswlondondahling @weirdr-artiest @serendipitous-amor @dummiesshort @damnyoudameron @lavender-writer @captainmandeestudent17 @whatareyouhidingpeter @takenbyheartstrings @ultrunning @imyourliquor-youremypoison @theolwebshooter @andreasworlsboring101 @guksmyfav @waiting-to-be-myself @letsloveimagines @peterparkoure @a-villain-vying-for-attention @justcallmehitgirl @averyfosterthoughts @jackiehollanderr @tiny-friggin-human @celestial-skylines @mara-twins @iamaunicorn4704 @spideygirl2003 @the-crazy-fanfictionist @maryjanee23 @geeksareunique @emmamarshmellow @jillanaholland @unbelievableholland @rebekkah4766 @flixndchill @sovereignparker @wendaiii @thisisthebiplace @spideydobrik @every-marveler-ever @undiadeestos @caelestii-e @eridanuswave @itscaminow @fiantomartell @solarxmoonchild @where-art-thau-romeo @canyouevencauseicant @illwritetomorrow @thehappygrungelife @saysomethingspiderman @parkerboop @smilexcaptainx @hes-amarillo @quaksonhehe @kelieah @quaksonhehe @kickingn-ames @purefluff @seasidecrowbar @lovelessdagger @love-sick-blues @electraheart-3174 @lou-la-lou @unbelievableholland @yourtypicalhotmess @goldfishinahat @spideyanakin @horanxholland @thesuitelifeofafangirl @anapocalypseinmymind @quacksonfics @marshxx @heyheycharlatte @nooneinvitedfascistbarbie @tomshufflepuff @cookiemonstermusic258 @maybemona

#peter parker x reader #peter parker fanfiction #peter parker x you #peter parker x venom!reader #venom #Steve Rogers #captain america #Bucky Barnes #avengers endgame #avengers infinity war

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itgetsdarksometimes35 · 4 years

Text

Day 2: Dayton White- Glory hole

Warnings: Non con, drunkenness/tipsiness,

Tags: @saiyanprincessswanie @mcudarklibrary @bucksgoat @coconutqueen21 @jtargaryen18 @collette04 @nsfwsebbie @what-just-happened-bro @gigistorm @avengerimscreaming @venusavengers @saharzek @navybrat817 @xoxabs88xox @harrysthiccthighss

This is a reupload b/c Tumblr sucks and deleted it, lol

XXX

You were a model at a race car track. You couldn’t say you were fond of your job, but it got the bills paid and it was an easy addition to your resume. You were an aspiring model but needless to say, it was a rocky road.

That was until the notorious NASCAR racing came into town. You were more than happy with one of the contestants that were on the list to compete: Dayton White. He had been your celebrity crush for years. If only you didn’t have to work.

As you were catering before the first race, you see a very familiar face in the crowd alone on his phone. You looked around for Brittney, your bitch of a supervisor. Talking to the racers was a huge no no, and you could easily have your job taken from you, but this was a once in a lifetime opportunity! Besides, you’d be fast. You just wanted to say hi.

“Uhm, Mr. White? Hi, I just wanted to say I’ve been a huge fan of yours for years.” Dayton looked up a little upset, but quickly changed his demeanor when he saw you. He quickly replaced a scowl with a wide smile.

“Hi, thank you that means a lot. I didn’t catch your name.” He extended his hand to you, one you happily took. You gave him your name as you formally greeted each other. “Happy to meet you, honey,” you couldn’t help the smile that crept up on your cheeks at the pet name, “Here, how about I sign something for you.” Dayton started shrugging the jacket he had on off as he reached into his pocket to retrieve a sharpie. Your eyes got big at the realization.

“Oh no, thank you. I just wanted to say hi to you, really.” Your insistence got you nowhere as he brushed it off and continued to sign the expensive jacket. He handed the fabric to you, and you hesitantly took it with shaky hands. If Brittney saw this…

You thanked Dayton as the speakers blared back to life. “All racers are to report to their positions at this time. I repeat, all racers are to report to their positions at this time.”

“Well, that’s my cue. Meet me after the race, I like to celebrate my wins with beautiful women.” You would normally cringe at an arrogant comment like that, but you couldn’t hear it over Dayton’s complement. You just smiled like an idiot and nodded your head as he strutted to his car.

Dayton of course won, blowing the other racers out of the water with an ahead speed of almost 10 seconds. As he emerged from the steaming vehicle, several photographers, journalists, and models working the show ran to him. You were never sure how he was able to stay cool under so much pressure and divide his time among the different mediums.

You continued working the catering until your shift was over when you felt a tap on your shoulder. You turned around to see a security guard with the name “White” on his left peck. “Ms. y/n?”

“Yes?”

“Mr. White would like to host you in his trailer if you’re free.”

You looked at the beer clock behind the bar and nodded your head as you saw you were now off the clock. You followed the guard, taking a pit stop of your own at your locker, then made your way to Dayton’s trailer.

You looked at the massive trailer that you were led to and you weren’t sure if “trailer” was the correct way to describe the house on wheels. The security guard opened the door and held it open to you to enter first. The inside was just as glamorous as the outside. The living area you stood in had more room in it than you had at the apartment you lived in with your roommates.

“Make yourself at home! Sorry about the mess, I don’t have a maid with me on the road sadly,” Dayton waltzed out of one of the back rooms with just a racer jacket and pants on. You could see his chiseled chest that looked like it was crafted by a Greek God, and you could feel your arousal in your bikini bottoms.

The door was closed and you looked back to see the guard gone. You walked to sit down as Dayton walked to you with a flute with what you assumed was filled with champagne. He handed it to you, but you eyed it suspiciously. Sure, he was a celebrity, but you weren’t naïve.

“Oh,” he took the glass and took a sip before handing it back to you, “I’m sorry, I didn’t think about how it looked,” he nervously laughed and sat down next to you. “I don’t drink due to my strict diet, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have a little fun.”

You nodded your head, you remembered reading somewhere that he took his diet and exercise very seriously. You deemed the champagne safe and sipped it down as you and Dayton continued to talk. You told him about your modeling career, or lack of, and he told you about his private life. He had been racing since he was a teenager, and even built his own race car at 19.

Your vision was getting fuzzy around your 5th glass, but Dayton didn’t seem to notice a difference in your demeanor. The next thing you knew, your lips were connected and his hands were traveling up and down your body. You tried to shake out of his grip, but his body just followed yours. You pushed him back the wall he called a chest, finally becoming successful.

“What?”

“I’m sorry, I think I should get home. I’m getting a little drunk.”

“You’re fine,” Dayton simply said as he tried to go back to kissing you. You blocked his kiss and quickly got up, causing you to almost stumble over. He followed you up as you reached for your things.

“Really, I think I’ll call an Uber. I’m sorry, I had a really good time tonight.”

Dayton drew out a sharp breath, but he didn’t try to stop you. “Okay, but don’t call an Uber. That’s not safe, you can crash here for the night. I’ll show you the guest room.” You didn’t have time to argue before he took your arm in a stronghold and brought you to a dark room in the back. The bedroom didn’t look like a normal one, the only thing remotely comparable to a normal one was the bed in the middle of the room. It looked more like the room in that movie, Fifty Shades of Grey was it?

Dayton continued to drag you into the room but he went nowhere near the bed. Instead, he pushed you to your knees in front of a black board with a hole in the middle and two poles on either side. Your mind was still trying to catch up with what your eyes were seeing as he handcuffed your wrists to the poles.

“W-what?”

“Shh, you’re going to be a good girl for me and suck my cock. If you do that, maybe I’ll release photos of us together, modeling agencies will be up your ass for years.” You sobered up at his words and pulled at your restraints with no luck.

“No! Please let me go, Dayton, please.” You tried to beg with your words due to your view of him being blocked because of the board. He just chuckled at your defeated efforts as you heard him undo his pants. He shoved his veiny cock through the hole, making the tip touch your lips.

“Can’t do that, baby girl. Now suck.”

#itgetsdarkspookychallenge #mcudarklibrarykinkmonth

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woulddieforperrytheplatypus · 4 years

Note

How do you feel about the new show coming out? Got any questions about it? Cause I have a thousand!

I’m gonna put my opinions under the cut, but for anyone wondering, Dan Povenmire (co-creator of Phineas and Ferb and voice of Doofenshmirtz) has a new show that Disney just greenlit called Hamster and Gretel. Here’s the link to his announcement on twitter and instagram, as well as the video reuploaded to tumblr

In all honesty, I think it sounds really bad 💀 It sounds like one of those kids' shows you'd see on Nick Jr. that you'd decide is really stupid by the time you turn eight. I think I said the same thing about MML, though, and it ended up being really good, so here's hoping Hamster and Gretel is like that.

I don't think I know enough about the show yet to really have any questions tbh. Google suggested this article on it from Deadline that has a little more info, but it seems like we won't get to know much about it until it gets closer to the release, whenever that will be.

I guess my biggest question is whether it's part of the Dwampyverse. I almost feel like it won't be because it doesn't look like Swampy had anything to do with it, which is kinda disappointing because they're such a power duo but I hope that means Swampy's working on his own project that we'll get to see soon. My guess is the most we'll get are a few references like we got in the first season of MML, which is kinda sad because obviously I love the Dwampyverse but at the same time, I'm glad Dan has the chance to start something new and I hope it works out well for him. I’d hate to think his legacy stops at Phineas and Ferb when he clearly wants to move on and do other things.

My other question, though I'm already assuming the answer is no, is whether this is another A-plot/B-plot type deal. I love the PnF — and somewhat MML — arrangement of A-plot (Phineas and the gang) and B-plot (Doof and Perry) that kinda alternates throughout the episodes because it keeps you on your toes, and if you don't like one half of the episode, you'll probably like the other half, so there are no bad episodes. Unfortunately I'm thinking that's not the case here or it would have been somewhere in the description, but I'm still holding out hope.

tl;dr I'm pretty pessimistic about the new show but I will be watching and most likely adding it as another subset of this blog, whether it occurs in the Dwampyverse or not. Also, fair warning but if I do end up liking it, I will 100% start coming up with HnG/PnF and HnG/MML crossovers and long and unnecessary metas about the HnG characters and no one can stop me lmao

#I've already claimed Kevin #i think Kevin's gonna be my favorite character #dan povenmire #hamster and gretel #i'm going to abbreviate it as HnG because we seem to agree that Phineas and Ferb is PnF and it just kinda works #if we as a fandom come up with a different abbreviation tho I'll start using that

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scxrlettwxtches · 5 years

Text

pretty cute | hwang hyunjin

Genre: pure fluff, highschool au

Warnings: none!

Word Count: +1.6k

Description: The moment Hwang Hyunjin snatched the unofficial confession from your desk (which he was definitely not supposed to read), you knew you were royally screwed.

A/N: 2nd reupload cause tumblr is mean. 🥺

Be honest, which of those boys do you think is the cutest?

That was the question written on a ripped piece of notebook paper, passed to you discreetly by your best friend. You blushed, because wasn’t it a given that all of them were the work of divine beings? Flipping the paper over, you wrote back in messy scribbles.

I don’t know! Aren’t they all handsome?

Sana giggled as she read your reply. Ripping out another piece of her notebook, she passed another message, giving a quick glance at the teacher in the front of the room to make sure he wasn’t looking.

You’re no fun at all. If you had to pick one…

You sighed, because you knew your friend would not stop bugging you about this until you gave her an honest answer. And it had to be an honest one, cause Sana somehow had the superpower of detecting lies even through paper messaging. When you passed her your answer, she gave a silent, but clearly delighted squeal, and you hoped to god this wouldn’t come bite you in the butt.

Hyunjin.

Speaking of the devil, just as you thought the conversation was over, the classroom door slid open, revealing a sweaty, black-haired, ridiculously handsome Hwang Hyunjin, who probably just finished his extra soccer practice during lunch break. It felt like the air had been sucked out of the room, and it didn’t help that his just-as-handsome friend, Felix, followed him in.

They commanded attention, and you swore every person had forgotten about the class entirely as the two bowed politely in apology and took their seats. You looked away, but couldn’t help sneaking occasional peaks at Hyunjin from the corner of your eye.

He was a good student, always being in the relative top of his class. Of course, you always had better grades than him, but it was pretty even seeing that he had to juggle his sports with his schoolwork.

Another paper slid onto your desk as Hyunjin walked to the front of the classroom to answer a problem on the whiteboard. Stop ogling him. You’re so whipped.

You gave Sana a dirty glare, ripping from your own notebook to write a furious response, but not before you caught the teacher scanning the classroom for disruptions. Discreetly, you folded the paper and placed it at the side of your desk. You’d just give it to her once Hyunjin sat back down.

Too caught up in your own head, you didn’t realize that Hyunjin was walking back to his seat through your aisle until he swiftly snatched the paper from your desk before you could even blink. Your mouth opened in protest, but no noise came out since you knew that you’d only be exposed to the teacher if you made a fuss. You were forced to watch as Hyunjin smoothly fell back into his chair, your note in hand. To your horror, Hyunjin unfolded the ripped piece of paper, scanning over its contents nonchalantly.

Sana had covered her mouth to stop physically herself from cackling, but not before she mouthed some kind, encouraging words to you.

You’re so dead.

Yeah, like you didn’t know that already.

You watched as Hyunjin read the note over, his eyes moving through it once, twice, then three times. You expected him to smile triumphantly, to gloat, because now he has dirt on the best student in class. But instead, his eyes darkened suddenly, and with a clench of his jaw, he stuffed the note into his uniform pocket.

Class flew by, and the moment the bell rang, you leapt out of your seat, not even bothering to wait for Sana as you escaped. She could handle herself. You had a national crisis on your hands, and there was no way you were gonna look Hyunjin in the eye for the next ten months.

You were successful for about four hours, when you were alone in the hallway, putting your textbooks back. Staying after school to help some of the teachers, the school was relatively empty, so your guard was lowered.

A hand slammed against the locker next to you, and you flinched, jumping up in surprise. Turning around, you could only see the familiar piece of paper dangling from the person’s other hand.

“Mind telling me what this is?”

Ignoring the painfully obvious blush on your face, you said tiredly, “Hello to you too, Hyunjin.”

Actually, unknown to many people, you and Hyunjin weren’t strangers. Back in the baby days of freshman year, the two of you were grouped together for the science final, which was a pair project. This was before Hyunjin became the prince of the school, when you were all still innocent freshmen trying to swim through the dark, scary ocean that was high school. The two of you got along fairly well, but before you knew it, he was swept away into a world of popularity that you couldn’t even begin to fathom.

You doubt Hyunjin really remembered, though.

Hyunjin looked unperturbed by your tone, “You didn’t answer the question.”

Rolling your eyes, you trained your face to look annoyed rather than nervous, “What do you think it is, genius? Don’t act like you haven’t passed notes in class before. It’s nothing.”

Hyunjin raised his eyebrows, pulling the note to eye level, “Really? A note that reads, “he’s so pretty, I think I’m gonna faint,” doesn’t seem like nothing.”

“Give it back!” All pretense forgotten as your face flushed, you lashed out for the paper, but your library-dulled reflexes were nothing compared to the speed of the school’s star athlete. You glared at Hyunjin angrily.

“I didn’t write it,” you lied smoothly, not breaking eye contact, but Hyunjin only laughed.

“Nice try. Don’t you think I’ve looked at your handwriting enough to know it’s yours? We literally spent hours a week on that science project.”

Oh, so he did remember. Utterly defeated, you sighed, slumping against the locker as you waited for whatever teasing was coming for you. You knew Hyunjin wasn’t mean, but anyone would feel powerful when they catch a love note from a girl who’s never dawned over anyone before.

“So, who’s the lucky guy?”

“W-what?”

“Who’s the lucky guy? Who’s the man special enough to steal the heart of the reserved, brilliant Ms. Y/N?”

Did...did Hyunjin not know that the note was about him? You were certain he was messing with you, trying to prolong the teasing before the two of you became strangers again, but Hyunjin’s face looked so genuinely distressed it finally hit that oh my god Hyunjin doesn’t know the note was about him.

“It’s Felix, isn’t it?” Hyunjin asked, a bitter tang to his voice that you couldn’t read, “I think I’ve seen you staring at him a couple times.”

“What? No!” You spluttered, because you couldn’t remember a time you actually stared at Felix. The only reason you ever looked in that direction was because he—

Hyunjin looked unconvinced, “It’s not Felix?” he then scowled deeper, “Oh, it’s Jisung, huh.”

“The hell? No, it’s not!” you exclaimed, because as handsome and friendly as Jisung was, the idea of liking the boy who almost set your table on fire after a failed science experiment was terrifying.

“You don’t have to lie,” Hyunjin said rather glumly, “He always got the better girls, anyway. If you want, I could set you up with him—”

You waved your hands wildly, “Noooo, thank you. I swear, I’m not into Jisung.”

“It’s okay, don’t worry. You’re so captivating, I’m sure he’d love you a lot and—”

“It’s about you!”

Your statement caught Hyunjin totally off guard, stopping his words instantly as his jaw grew slack. You turned your head, because now you’ve really done it. You just indirectly told Hyunjin that he was so pretty, you were going to faint. Well, it was the truth.

“Th-the note was about me?” Hyunjin backed away from you, and to your utter shock, his face was bright pink as he covered his mouth with his hands.

“You don’t have to repeat it out loud,” you said uncomfortably, “Honestly, I’d rather you just forget this whole thing ever happened—”

“No!” Hyunjin exclaimed, surprising you again at the desperation in his voice, “It’s just—do you mean it?”

“The note?” your face must’ve been an impossible shade of red, but you answered truthfully, “Yeah, I think you’re really pretty, and…I’ve liked you since freshman year.”

Hyunjin’s eyes widened, “A-are you serious?”

“Well, I’m blushing like a tomato. Do you think I’m lying?”

“It’s just,” Hyunjin’s hands fell from his face as he looked at you, “I’ve had a crush on you since freshman year, too.”

What the fuck.

“Don’t even lie,” You warned, your heart pounding but your brain urging you to be logical, and logic says quite clearly that someone as perfect as Hyunjin couldn’t possibly be interested in someone like you, “We haven’t talked since the science project.”

Hyunjin looked rather hurt as he retorted, “I tried, don’t you remember?” his face still pink as he murmured, almost to himself, “You’re always running away from me, so I assumed you just figured out I had feelings for you and thought I was weird.”

Sighing, because there was obviously a distinct miscommunication, you said earnestly, “No, Hyunjin, I started avoiding you because I didn’t want to bother you when you were getting so popular around school.”

“I don’t care about my popularity!” Hyunjin exclaimed, before gently reaching for your hand, brightening when you didn’t pull away, “All I cared about was that you stopped talking to me.”

You blushed, because Hyunjin was moving closer and closer until his lips could almost brush against your ear.

“Would you give me a chance?” he asked softly, hesitation clear in his tone, “I promise I won’t screw this up.”

In your heart, you knew he wouldn’t. There was a reason you’ve admired him from afar for so long. Before he could react, you stood on your toes, gently pressing your lips against his cheek.

“Okay, let’s try it.”

#stray kids imagines #stray kids scenarios #stray kids reactions #hwang hyunjin scenarios #my fics

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millennial-star-gazer · 4 years

Text

The Draconic Demon Within: Chapter 4: A Demon’s All-Consuming Rage

The Draconic Demon Within

Genres: Romance, Friendship/Family, Drama/Angst, Hurt/ Comfort, & New Adult Fanfiction

Vera's April 2018 Prompts: Soul, Empyrean, Savage, Memory, Trust, Fear, Unstoppable , Resilient, Supernatural (Implied) Lost (Implied) and Loathing.

Nalu Lovefest 2017 Prompts: Dreams

Nalu Week 2019 Prompts (Implied:) Lost, Curse, Trial, Treasure, Chance and possibly Bare.

Pairing: Nalu/EndLu,( Natsu x Lucy/ E.N.D. x Lucy)

Rating: M for language, steamy and mature adult sexual content (all consensual) in these and future chapters. Reader Direction is advised.(You have been warned!)

Summary: Now faced with the reality of who he is truly is, the son of Igneel must contend with the new darker instincts of his new demonic identity- all while navigating through his ever-growing, intense feelings for a particular celestial wizard. Originally a Submission (semi -au) for Nalu lovefest 2017 (on my previous celestialgeekmage account and now an entry for nalu week 2019 with chapter 3. (Also was on my earliest previous accounts of teamedwardjace/Twishadowhunter in the past. Also part of Vera's April 2018 prompt challenge from fic-writers appreciation on cosmicdragonwizard).

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Chapter 4: A Demon's All- Consuming Rage

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A/N: Hey guys, it's your girl back again with another installment of TTDW! Fun fact: Being temporarily off work for a few weeks due to pandemic has provided some extra free time to edit and posta new chapter for this fic ( which is on account of the temporary closures of public institutions, and public spaces along with non-essential businesses/services in Ontario-the Canadian province I'm from). This isn't to suggest I'm not without fear or concern about the pandemic or potential effects on global infrastructure but at least I'm mostly coping as best as anyone can at this time. Hope you guys are all too. ( A bit more on this in the A/N at the end of this chapter .) Anyway, hope that this chapter and my other fanfics along with those from amazing writers can help you all while stuck at home. All right, that's pretty much my whole spiel for now. Without further ado, here's Chapter 4 of TTDW-Enjoy!

(Note: Scroll down past the read more button/cut for the designated legend menu and actual story content).

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Disclaimer: Fairytail does not belong to me, but to the most honourable Hiro-sensei instead, for whom without this work of love wouldn't be possible.

Read Previous Chapters of TDDW and on platforms here:

(Copy and paste the links into another window if need be)

A. Tumblr

Previous (Click Here:) (or here: https://millennial-star-gazer.tumblr.com/post/185917542578/the-draconic-demon-within-chapter-3)

Next (Coming Soon:)

B. Fanfiction (Click Here:) (or here: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13113898/1/The-Draconic-Demon-Within-Reupload-from-cosmicdragonwizardaccounts)

C. A03 (Click Here:) (or here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17365061/chapters/40861307)

2. Ongoing Master Post Of All My Writing (Click Here:) (or here: https://millennial-star-gazer.tumblr.com/post/179665258923/master-fic-rec-post)

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Legend:

Italic: Song Lyrics/Quotes (or flashback dialogue)

Bold: First Person Thoughts

Bolded Italics: Empathized, stylized Word(s) or bloodthirsty fantasies

Bolded Italics (Within and Outside Bracket) including for author's side notes also known as (A/N:) within brackets (though none for side-notes in this chapter ).

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"Your body is full of rage.

Every sinew. It is easy to read.

You speak volumes with a clenched fist."

( Paolo Bacigalupi: The Drowned Cities)

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"Seriously? Luce's alive?

That…. I can't...

A wave of overjoyed relief was washing over Natsu from the spectacular news about his best friend still breathing.

"Hear that Luce?!" He sobbed, not bothering to wipe the moisture from his eyes." You're alive and gonna be okay— Thank God! Really... don't ... know what I'd do without ya…," Scarlet-red eyes remained focused/trained on the face on the motionless angel in his arms.

"Pretty sure the guild and the rest of the people we know would be just as devastated if they lost such an incredible person and wizard . Glad you're okay either way though." Natsu's hands were stroking sweat-plastered strands of Lucy's hair back from her eyes with delicate care .

Really glad she's still in fact alive and kicking…

In that very moment , it was as if the world had fallen away; leaving just the two of them. Nothing else seemed to matter then . Not cold-blooded enemies in the room, or the recent battle just moments before; Not even E.n.d's unnerving metamorphosis. Just a dragon-demon and his most precious star with those subtle breaths, the visible rise and fall of her chest that somehow escaped any kind of major notice before.

Words can't even describe how relieved I am . Digits combed through Lucy's blonde tresses from crown to tip in a physical display of tender affection.

Hmm... Lucy's hair feels really nice. Natsu couldn't help but marvel at texture of her beneath his fingertips .Don't think I've ever stopped to fully appreciate it before .

"Gotta say that your hair feels really nice, Luce." Natsu voiced this innermost thoughts aloud; though his words were coming in soft. ."Smells real amazin' too."

Damn was the appealing fragrance of jasmine with a hint of cyclamen flooding his senses beyond intoxicating."like jasmine and that other flower we saw once— cyclamen, I think. . You've been using a new scented shampoo again, I see. Not that I'm complainin'."

"Psh—Listen to me" Natsu tacked on with a rueful chuckle that was still a bit thick from all that weeping before. " Gettin' all sentimental and crap. Hell... stripper would never even let me live it down if he heard . Still be damn proud of you though just like I am for how well you handled yourself in battle. Why don't we tell him all about it once you're awake and we're out of here?. Bet he'd like that . Till then, the two of us just need to sit tight and figure out our next move, okay?"

Wait ...

The fire demon's hands continued their fond movements- only for blood to freeze in his veins when noticing an unsightly contusion on Lucy's forehead; accented by a small gash just above her brow.

When did this happen? I swear those injuries hadn't there been seconds before .. .

Crimson eyes scanned his best friend's battered frame for further damage in alarm . My God... Natsu's breath caught in his throat at the sight of that line of discolorations on her legs . Not to mention all those scratches along with the small gash peeking out through the tattered remains of Lucy's Star dress .

"Oh Luce..." He sighed, remorseful voice breaking on her name. "Can see that you're in pretty rough shape right now. I'm so sorry. Honestly don't know how or why you had a delayed reaction to all the damage. But this wouldn't have happened if I only had grabbed you and run or got your spirits to transport you to their world, Hell— Maybe we could've both escaped and I could've helped kept you safe while figuring out this new demon form means for us together. Anyways, time to put pressure on your wound."

A hand tore a loose piece of fabric to apply pressure on the hemorrhaging wound. "See? You'll be okay . Gonnal get ya' all fixed up and good as new in no time ."

Damn Luce stills looks like an angel to me, Natsu mused in reverent admiration . Even with those injuries...

"Ooh- how cute!" Jackal's dervisie voice cut through the other demon’s reverie; whose arms automatically protectively tightened around Lucy's frame out of fierce instinct-automatic without a second though. Not to mention those two pair of eyes he could sense that set him on edge."

"Aw Damn." Jackal broke in again with a gleeful taunt that bordered on sadistic."That poor,pretty girl of you is covered in ugly bruises and scratches, Dragneel."

That little ...

Natsu's head automatically snapped around to meet Jackal with a baleful snarl. Damn was that all that black rage roaring in his veins all too consuming.

"There's that growling again" Jackal cackled, clearly unfazed at by the alpha demon's bared canines ." Bared fangs and what not. Such a shame what happened to Blondie here , or is it? You really did a number on her, huh Tempester?"

"Huh," Tempester mused, bland disinterest colouring his tone."it seems I did . Kind of forgot that my curses can sometimes have o delayed side effects on people . Who knows? That pathetic wrench might even have internal bleeding.

"You goddamned bastard!" The flame- eater raged, fury boiling over. "Lucy ain't pathetic or some kind of toy to play with ... God.. All those injuries… are you fault and . I swear that You're both gonna pay for what you did to her!"

"Oh-You think so?" Jackal scoffed with let out another infantilizing laugh —beyond infuriating .

"Someone's rattled." Tempster pointed out, listless eyes trained on the stone-brick wall ahead. "Unfortunate."

"You don't say," Jackal deadpanned, with a disdainful roll of the eyes ."But Seriously Though , E.N.D, do you even hear yourself? .I mean getting all riled up over a human girl in that way —talk about pathetic. Sure said girl is extremely beautiful with a killer bod and feisty personality to boot—I'll give you that. But is she worth losing your cool over or fraternizing with? I don't think so and neither should you . God knows all that pent up rage and aggression would be far more suited for another cause. Not to mention, you'd better off without her life tainting your judgement and hindering your full potential as the most powerful of all etherious. So let's resolve this, shall we? Hand over the celestial wizard and I'll gladly dispose of her for you . Sound good?"

" 'Sound good?'Sound Good?!’ Are you kidding me?"!

Good God did those last words only serve to incense the snarling dragon further.

" There's no way in hell I'm gonna give Lucy up or let either of you touch her!"

"Come on Dragneel-be reasonable."

"No-rot in hell!"

"Oh honestly E.N.D.-"

"My name is Natsu!"

"Well okay then, Natsu— Just calm down ." Jackal's couldn't seem to resist reprimanding the fire demon; as if he were some errant child pitching a fit ."You're being ridiculous. Anyways, tell you what. I promise to make her death as qui-"

"Shut up!"

" Quick and mostly painless..."

"I said shut up!" En.d's voice rose to an ear-splitting roar that could've struck terror into the hearts of the gods themselves. "Try anything on her and I swear I'll kill you!"

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To Be Continued

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A/N: Well that's Chapter 4 folks- hope you enjoyed! Now a bit more about the pandemic situation in Ontario . Like many other provinces and countries around the world,, the government of Ontario has opted to shut down/ temporarily close non-essential services, businesses, public spaces and institutions to help curb the spread of the virus for a few weeks (or more) before spring break. Such institutions include all schools and childcare centres/ services in those settings which applies to the childcare company I'm currently employed with. You know on account of most of their centres and programs being based in public schools. (Independently-run Daycares also remain closed. And yes i'm a ECE by trade for any who were wondering or didn't already). Schools and child cares were tentatively scheduled to reopen after April 5th; though the closures have been extended for another month (according to Doug Ford (the premier/leader of Ontario). Not ideal but at least it gives me some extra time for me to work on things alongside my writing(i.e editing upcoming chapters for fics and WIPS). All right folks, that's all I have to say on that subject.

As usual, please feel free to let me know what you think by leaving a comment/review , through a reblog or by any other means. Be sure to check out the rest of my writing while staying tuned for future updates of my fics and new projects along the way! (Links above, in the navigation and in bio If on tumblr . Also on fanfiction.) Anyway, take care and stay safe! Ta ta for now!

#fairytail #ft fanfics #nalu #endlu #natsu x lucy #natsu dragneel #etherious natsu dragneel #lucy heartfilia #future lucy dragneel #the draconic demon within #my writing #millennial stargazer writes #millennial star gazer #please reblog

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berri-hopefulspouse · 4 years

Text

-- A Look Into The Past --

[ Reuploaded for your convenience~ Because tumblr is an ass~ ]

Fandom & Characters: Danganronpa, Ren (DR s/i, Ultimate Empath), [Mentioned/Minor roles] Celestia Ludenberg, Chihiro Fujisaki, Junko Enoshima, Sayaka Maizono, Makoto Naegi, Aoi Asahina, Kiyotaka Ishimaru, Yasuhiro Hagakure, various Future Foundation technicians and scientists

TW: Self-Harm & Suicide Mentions/Implications, violence/gore warning, emetophobia, Laboratory/Science stuff, Panic attacks, Runaway, Dissociation, Dysphoria implication, Neglect, Bullying mention, General assholery, Hella angst, Mention of bondage & restraints (mostly as jokes), Deadname drop, general PTSD stuff, Hallucinations, Alcohol mention, Homo & transphobia, NB-Phobia, Manipulation, Gaslighting

AN: Another reuploaded story from my previous account! This one was definitely the most uh. Chaotic in terms of trigger warnings, as you can see. All of these are events following THH, and not long before the events that predate DR2 occur. So keep that in mind. ALSO! At the time this is posted (10/3/2020) - this is the story that precedes the current F/O event going on, hinted at here.

Summary: After the events at Hopes Peak High, each member of the class- over time- are put into a procedure to regain the memories lost over the 2 years. It’s Ren’s turn, and being the last one for various personal reasons- they are nervous. Is it worth it to retrieve memories of the past? Or would they have been better off not knowing at all?…

Fidget. Fidget and broil in thought. Fidget and listen. Listen.

“You understand the conditions in which you'll go under, Mx?” An older man asked them, “The process will take but a few hours, with one of the devices we have on hand.” They didn't know much of this man- save for one thing. He was one of the technical scientists who worked for Future Foundation- something somewhat new to the brunette.

The weeks following their escape from Hopes Peak...from Junko...it was a bit messy. Scooped up by this organization that apparently was the revolution for hope and trying to contain the disease that was despair. Taking days to breathe and recover from the events, only to have to explain themselves alongside their classmates. So, here they were now. One by one, they were all being asked the same thing; Do they want their memories recovered? Do they want to recall the two years lost to them due to Junko’s meddling?...

“Yes, I understand.” Soren mumbles, shyly, wringing their hands into their shirt, “I am ready to proceed.”

Whether they were ready for it or not, they knew they had to know. They had to know what they missed, how they were connected to everyone...what their past was like…

Believe it or not, even their childhood felt fuzzy to them. In a way, them and Kirigiri were connected in that sense. Theirs however was...different.

‘I’m the last one who’s going through this procedure…’ They recalled to themselves as they got up, following the scientist into the laboratory...they felt nervous- and part of them wished Makoto was with them to offer some reassurance.

‘He’s been running himself ragged lately with tasks and plans though, we’ve all been working hard...I let him rest when I got called up.’

They thought back to exactly why they were one of the last people to be brought to this laboratory. Intensive therapy, trying to recover from the events of the Killing School life...sure, it affected everyone quite differently, but for them it almost seemed to bring out the worst in them. Persistent nightmares, paranoia, fainting spells… It didn’t take long for them to be brought to counselling once the others found out- although it was mostly due to Makoto outting his concern for them.

‘They figured it was PTSD, naturally. I knew that, it’s basic psychology... But still…’ From what they explained… ‘It seems like it goes far beyond just Hopes Peak. It just seemed like that whole shitshow might’ve just been a breaking point.’

Sitting down in one of the chairs in the laboratory, they looked to the various technicians who were around. All typing away at computers, ready to begin the process.

“Like I said, this will take a few hours...and given your special circumstance, definitely a bit longer than most to recover. However, we’re also not certain if all your memories will be recovered.” He explained, securing both their legs and arms to the chair with small clasps. Easy enough to break out of given an emergency were to occur, but enough to restrain any potential flailing. They lightly tugged on the restraints, feeling very little give.

“You going to explain the bondage, or am I just gonna have to deduce that on my own accord?” They joked lightly, giving a shaky smile to the older man who shook his head with a sigh, ignoring the younger adult’s antics.

“They’re just in case. We don’t know what memories might surface, and given your previous history...we just want to make sure you don’t injure yourself in any way.”

Looking away, they felt the slight phantom burns along their wrist as they recalled exactly what they all meant. Sure, the scars on their wrist were...older than they recalled...Most of which were faded deep into their skin. All except one, from a more recent relapse episode.

‘Hence the need to keep me safe, I guess,’ They thought to themselves, ‘No one at Future Foundation really treats me like the rest of the class…’

And why would they? Ren was a special case, after all, being hung with a slew of various mental disorders… As the psychologist in charge of them put it; “They walk the line of both hope and despair. They try so desperately to cling to hope, but given their potential history, succumbing to despair might simply be an inevitability.”

That anxious thought caused them to shudder, not quite listening to the scientific rambling of the technician as they secured a device to their head. Deep breaths...one after another. The static in their ears receded, until they heard the technician speak again.

“Did you hear what I said, Soren?”

“Huh? Oh. Oh yeah!” They lied through their teeth, “Let’s just get this over with, yeah…”

The technician headed out of the room, reappearing behind the glass wall that was before them. Taking one last glance around the room, it was circular. It reminded them almost of the trial grounds- but more...high-tech. It was an observation room of sorts, however, shown by the glass and the scientists working away behind it.

‘This is either going to go well…...or really, really poorly.’ They thought to themselves as they took a slow breath.

There was a slight crackle, an intercom. Their heartbeat skipped for a second but they quickly regathered themselves.

‘It’s not him. You’re not there anymore.’ They reminded themselves as a voice came on.

“Okay, we’re going to begin the procedure. Are you ready?”

They tried giving a stiff nod, but finding their head was basically fixed in place, simply hummed.

“Ready.”

“Proceeding then, in Five...Four...Three…”

‘Deep breaths, in and out.’

“Two…”

‘Everythings going to be just fine.’

“One.”

A weird sensation started, right at their temples, only mere moments after the word left the technician’s mouth. Then, a low hum, that made Ren sit a bit straighter with a nervous anxiety and itch at their mind. The hum got louder, louder, louder still…

Until they completely blacked out, altogether.

–☆–

“Ḷ̵̨̜̹̣̖̮̮́ȁ̶̧̼͖̥̰̱̆̈́͂i̴̦̗̪̯̲̻͇̫͑̾̄̆l̸̘̗͕͎̩̈́̄̃͆a̷̡̯͑̑̃̔̈̂̓.̸͓̮̓͂͛̆̏͗̈.̷̗̲̞͙̼̗̈́͗͌̈́͜͠͝.̸̡̛̺̰͓̟̼̙̙̯̀̂̌̓̅͑͜͜?̶͔͍͛̾̊̑̓̇̌̈̅̈́̚͝͝”

A voice. Disconnected. Everything felt heavy, almost familiarly so. The name- it didn’t feel like their own, and it rang with such a chord of familiarity that it felt like a dagger straight through their throat. They suddenly felt so...so sick, but they couldn’t place why...

“Laila?” A bit louder this time, taking a slow breath in and out, they- no, she- looked up.

“Huh?”

She was seated at a desk- one that...she(-they, no wait uh)...she believed was their own. However, the face that greeted her...she couldn’t even figure out who it was.

“Jeez, I can’t believe you fell asleep in class again.” The person said, a cheeky grin on his features. Jet black hair and light brown eyes greeted (him...them, fuck-) her, and she tried putting a name to a face but...she can’t seem to quite remember, “C’mon, slowass, we’ve got practice.”

“Pra...practice?”

Drama practice.

The word clicked into her mind, and almost instantly she sat up further.

“Oh shit- That’s today?!”

“No duh, it’s Tuesday, remember?! Sheesh, you’re so forgetful. Cmon-!”

Before the person- Viktor, the name clicked in her brain almost like it was always there- could finish what she was saying, the brunette had gotten up and run out of the room, into a hallway.

‘Hercules Middle School…’ She thought to herself (Himself? Why was it so difficult?), as she ran down the hallway, ‘I always grew up here...jeez, I just wanna leave from this nightmare of a school already.’

She skidded a bit as they turned, running straight into a wall with a slight thud and a yelp of pain.

“Okay, ow.” She groaned a bit, blinking. He- She had ended up on the floor, head fuzzy slightly as she pulled themselves to their feet.

“Sheesh, dude, you’re so clumsy.” Viktor talked to her, chuckling as she pulled herself to her feet, only to get smacked upside the head, “Watch where you’re walking next time!”

“Eheh...s-sorry.” She stuttered a bit, almost shy.

“Don’t apologize for everything, man, it’s gonna look pathetic on ya,” Viktor assured, causing her to blush a bit and look away.

“R-right.”

She chuckled nervously, not meeting his expression- afraid to express his- her (their?) mild hurt at what he said.

“Lets get going, we’re running late.”

“Okay…”

With that said, Viktor quickly took a hold of her hand, and the two quickly raced off through the winding corridors of the school.

Even so, as they started to step into the gym, he felt a slight buzz in her pocket. Taking out her phone- dated as it was- they checked the message she received from their- His- her childhood best friend...Kayla.

[ (Kay) 2:43 PM: Hey...dude, U should see this shit. Are you with Vik rn? ]

[ (Lai) 2:44 PM: Yea, y? ]

[ (Kay) 2:44 PM: U need to see this. ]

[ [Kayla sent IMG32452 ] ]

Looking at the image, her heart froze. It was a series of texts between her and Viktor, with the former talking about how childish she was. How much of a crybaby she was over the littlest things, sensitive to every little poke at her. How much of a copycat she was. How it was just so easy to be friends with her, to use her...And her eyes teared up. Kayla looked to be at least trying to defend her...these weren’t even from 20 minutes ago…

“Laila? You coming, dude?” His-Her thoughts were interrupted by Viktor, as their head jerked up to look at him. He-- She didn’t know what she felt. Part of her wanted to hit him, part of him wanted to scream at him, part of them wanted to ask if they did something wrong...but...

“I...Uh...I don- I don’t feel good suddenly. T-Tell t-them I’ll be in...in a minute…” She mumbled out, feet slowly staggering back as an arm laced around their stomach. That wasn’t entirely a lie, either, they felt faint…they felt sick...she felt...hurt.

Before Viktor could see them cry...she turned and ran off, tears blurring his-(her-their--) her vision as the squeak of sneakers filling the hallways and their crowded mind.

The colors around them blurred, holding their head in their hands as they trembled in place. Suddenly, they were in the bathroom- though they sensed the day was different than it was mere moments ago. But that wasn’t what was taking up their thoughts. It was staring into the mirror- at the square glasses and overly pudgy baby-face they have. Staring at someone that wasn't her- that isn’t who they are!

‘Fuck, fuck, why do I hate myself so much?!’ (They- She- he-) She asked herself, struggling to breathe. Even being in the girls’ bathroom felt suffocating, but it was all she knew. Sure, she didn’t feel “dysphoria” like Viktor did...but she felt wrong. She felt WRONG. Her arms shook, nails digging into her skin as she hugged herself tightly. She wanted to shave all her hair off- she wanted to rip off her chest- she wanted- she wanted--

‘Agh! I can’t...I can’t breathe-!’ She forced herself to look away from the mirror, thinking about all the times she was addressed as a girl...all the times she felt wrong in an environment where she should feel comfortable. She always considered herself a tomboy- someone who definitely wasn’t on the feminine side of things...but it felt deeper. Her name made her want to puke- this long hair made her want to scream. The floofy, glittery, feminine clothing made her want to cry, scream, do anything. Something. But all she could do was struggle to breathe, struggle to consider what was happening to her.

That wasn’t even going into all the bullying. How she didn’t fit in with anyone in her class- even amongst her friends. She didn’t THINK she was transgender like Viktor was, but she knew something was...wrong with her. Something different. She couldn’t be a girl, either, she couldn’t be. All the torture she went through day to day- with her family, with her friends, with her classmates, with her-fucking-self. She was in a war she felt like she was losing.

‘...Wouldn’t it be great, if I died right here?’ A voice whispered in the back of their head, causing them to freeze up, ‘Taking the razors and digging them deep into your neck-’

“Laila?”

A voice from outside the bathroom quickly shut them out of their intrusive, suicidal thoughts. She recognized that voice- it was the school nurse. She took a deep breath, in and out- but words struggled to escape their throat, save for a soft squeak of a sob.

“Is everything okay?...”

‘...I can’t keep doing this to myself...I-I need to tell her...what’s going on…’ She at least was self-aware enough to know that much. She couldn’t put herself through her own hell anymore...So whether she was ready for whatever would come or not...she rubbed her eyes a bit, slowly stepping back out into the hallway to try and finally reach out- after years of remaining silent.

...Darkness...it kept swallowing them up, almost like a tidal wave. It took a second to recall what was going on. Right. The procedure. Future Foundation. Was...was that a memory then? Were these dreams of memories of their past? How long did they feel like this?!

‘Viktor…’ The name felt bitter on their tongue, and with it a small swell of various emotions came to head. Depression, anguish, betrayal…

‘He talked shit behind my back… we went all the way back to middle school. I trusted him with everything but…’

A voice, Viktor’s, cut through the noise of their head.

“C’mon man, you know I never mean it. Besides, if you weren’t such a damn prick, I wouldn’t need to call you out on your shit all the time.”

“Jeez, you never had gender issues before until I started bringing up that I was trans. What are ya, a copycat?”

“What are you gonna say next, that you’re trans too? Haha! Dude, Nonbinary folk can’t be trans. Besides, you don’t have any physical dysphoria, yeah?”

For years, he manipulated them. Teased them. Backstabbed them.

‘How could I forget about him?...How could I forget about how I was treated growing up by everyone?! Well, I guess I chose to after I came to Japan…’

The sadistic smile came into their mind’s eyes. Those dark brown eyes they admired for so long...it was because of him they became an artist. That they were exposed to who they were, and yet-

A sharp pain echoed through the back of their head, causing them to physically flinch- though it was restricted.

‘That’s right, I was bound to that chair in case something unforeseen happened…’ They reminded themselves, despite still trying to thrash. If their voice would work, they’d likely be crying out in pain.

Still, after another moment, the pain ebbed a bit. They recalled something else. Why that betrayal, that anger...it was so strong…

The blog. The hate. The messages telling them to do something drastic- to kill themselves. The pressure that nearly did cost them their life, had it not been for their escape…

‘...Yet it took me until...some point later...because I know he’s definitely not in my life anymore.’ They told themselves, taking a few breaths to try and ease the picture of the blog from their mind- to stop themselves from seeing red.

They didn’t notice the shuddering they were feeling until a few moments later, but that soon calmed back down.

‘...I do wonder how Kayla is...I didn’t even remember her until now. Did she hurt me too? Did she forget about me when I ran away to Japan…? I don’t know..’ Still, they sighed as Viktor’s laugh cut through their thoughts. Despite themselves, they felt a sense of nostalgia at the sound.

‘Even if he’s a bastard...even though he hurt me in ways that could potentially never heal...I hope he’s doing okay in all of this.’ That little part of them whispered in the space of their subconscious, as memories of their friendship swirled in their mind, ‘I wouldn’t wish despair like this on anyone else…’

It was vague images, ones that felt distant enough that they couldn’t recall in full detail, but they were still there...his house- all the sleepovers. He helped them get their hair cut. He helped them with art. He introduced them to all sorts of new media that, looking back then, they realized was what made them who they were now… A small smile drew out of them. He took them in when they almost couldn’t take their home life anymore, for a short time. Laughing together with Kayla...it felt so distant, but the happiness they felt then...it was still real. It was still real to them, throughout all of that.

Still, that hum, that distinct hum from before that they realized had fallen into the background noise was suddenly at the forefront of their attention once more- growing louder and changing frequency, in a way that made it feel like they were burning. Not with any emotion, but just...burning.

Soon, their thoughts slipped away once more, and with it- the hum died back down once more.

“All readings are going according to plan.” One scientist said to another, “Though we’re picking up distress and hints of pain after turning up the frequency... Is the machine correctly calibrated?”

“It should be as such, unless…” The technician that talked to the brunette earlier pursed his lips in though, before hissing lightly in annoyance through his teeth, “...Unless the subject has an auditory processing issue. Shit- Turn the frequency down a few notches.”

“But sir, if we do so, the memories will most definitely be unable to resurface. Remember, this science isn’t quite perfect yet- we can’t make expenses for the issue.” One female technician spoke up, adjusting her glasses.

“...” The man bit his nail nervously, before sighing and nodding, “Of course. Continue the procedure.”

–☆–

“Where is that piece of shit kid?!” It was dark. There was lightning going on outside. Their heart was racing, “I’m going to rip her to shreds!”

‘It’s just a hallucination, god please just let it be a hallucination,’ They thought to themselves, closing their eyes- trying to shut out the feeling of fear- even if their head was pounding.

“I can’t believe she got another F on a math test- can you believe this?! I work with her constantly on it, and yet it's like she doesn’t even hear me!” The gruff man grumbled, the voice a distinct echo, as the brunette hid their face into their knees. The sounds of screaming, the sounds of banging… the sounds of things being thrown- it made their heart race. But they knew better. These were just their mind playing games on them from the past. Focus. They had to ground themselves, but…

‘I’m so scared, god I’m so damn scared…’ They took a few deep breaths, putting their hands to their ears. Focus.

‘I’m in my room. It’s summer. There’s rain outside and the...smell of... alcohol... is very strong in the air… M-maybe I should open the window.’ Reaching up, they fiddle with the locks in their window for a few moments before flinging it open, letting the smell of nighttime air and rain pattering to the ground slowly drown out the scent of booze that lingered. In moments, the noise in their ears ebbed, and they were able to breathe again. Thankfully. With a bit more focus, the numbness seeped in, and they felt themselves slowly relax. Numbness...it was the only reprieve from the living nightmare of their heart. Controlling it took practice, and being able to shut everything out...it was their only escape. Even if…

‘...Even if it cost someone their life before because of my neglect…’ They thought to themselves, feeling their focus wane and the anxiety starting to ebb back into their vision.

“It’s okay...it’s okay…” They whispered to themselves as they got up, “It’s...It’s not like that anymore. It’s..It’s okay.” They forced themselves to breathe again, focusing again on keeping that numbness deep in- if only to protect themselves from their own pain. They had to get up. They had things to do. They had to keep going.

Their feet felt heavy, slowly gliding across their small room and peering out into the hallway. Silence. Somber, peaceful silence- save for the sounds of the television faintly heard from downstairs. Slowly slipping downstairs, a voice greeted them.

“La- I-I mean, Soren?”

“Y-yeah?” They stuttered out, feigning a smile as they poked their head over to where their father sat on the couch- watching the television screen. He at least tried with them, but still…

“Did you take your medication?”

“I-I’m gonna…” They mumbled sheepishly, their smile flickering a bit.

“Are you okay?”

“.....Y-yeah.” They lied through their teeth- in a manner that was not at all subtle. Part of them wondered if he’d ask, or if he’d just happen to not notice again.

“...Okay.” He smiled, “Don’t forget you start class next week. Hercules High needs you!”

“R-right…”

“And don’t forget you perform for the next few weeks!”

“I-I do? B-but I thought that wasn’t until next week!” Their shock was portrayed in their tone, feeling their heart race. Summer felt like the only time they got to rest, and even then it didn’t feel like it was long enough to deal with the stress they went under.

“They’re starting volleyball season early, and you know the boss needs you.” He shrugged it off, ignoring the clear concern on their features, which fell to simple stress. A few moments of silence drawled on- to which they felt their phone go off in their pocket. They didn’t look at it for a little while, trying to not start crying at even the slightest thought of performing, before finally speaking up once more in a defeated tone.

“...O-Okay. I’ll g-go take my medication, night dad…” “Night sweetie!”

As they tiptoed away though, walking only on the balls of their feet, one thought only crossed their mind.

‘I need to get out of here. I can’t wait to escape any longer. I can’t wait. I can’t deal with the bullying anymore...I can’t take the manipulation anymore...’ A slow inhale, a slow exhale. They had been preparing it for months. Getting a passport, slowly packing things they would need- including funds to transfer from euros into yen…

‘I have to buy that ticket tonight. The last plane out for the next week.’

Their phone buzzed again, which brought them from their thoughts. Slowly, they sighed, taking out their phone.

‘If anyone can calm me down after this nightmare, it’d be my friends-’ They thought to themselves, until seeing the ID.

[ (Stepmom) 11:34 PM: Have you helped your dad out with his account yet? You have to take care of him you know, he can’t take care of himself. ]

Their blood boiled a bit, and despite themselves they quickly texted back.

[ (Ren) 11:35 PM: ...I’m 16, I shouldn’t have to take care of my own parents. Also, it depends- do you still have my binder hidden away somewhere? ]

[ (Stepmom) 11:37 PM: Your what? ]

[ (Ren) 11:37 PM: You know what it is, because I haven’t seen it since I put it in the wash a month ago. ]

For several minutes, as Ren went about the kitchen preparing their medication, they watched her type, the ‘(...)’ making them nervous as they tapped their fingers along their side. But, eventually…

[ (Stepmom) 11:41 PM: Oh, that. It’s going to hurt you if you wear it, it’s too tight. Honestly, I don’t know why you wear something that physically hurts you, so I threw it out. ]

[ (Ren) 11:41 PM: . . . You what. ]

It took everything in them to not throw their phone at the wall in anger. They saved up for months for that! They just wanted to present as themselves! It wasn’t even that tight compared to other, less safer binders! It fit fine!

[ (Stepmom) 11:43 PM: This is for your own good, darling. After all, you wouldn’t want your chest to start sagging, would you? ]

[ (Ren) 11:44 PM: I told you it fit fine. I told you not to mess with it, and how to properly wash it, and you decide to throw it out? The thing I bought with my own money? ]

[ (Stepmom) 11:45 PM: I told you, it’s for your own good. Besides, this phase of yours with being ‘transgender’ will pass in time. ]

Slow breath, in and out. Their grip on their phone tightened before turning it off altogether, taking very intentional slow breaths so they didn’t outright explode into a fit of anger in the middle of the kitchen.

‘She never fucking understands! I explained it to her so many times, I’ve told her this wasn’t just a phase, I begged her to use my name and let me just exist- but she just...can’t! And my dad never does anything! They’ll never do anything!! I just...I wanna be myself. I can’t take it anymore!’

As they gathered their medication, which rested in the kitchen, along with a bottle of water, they looked to their father’s wallet- which rested on the counter. They just needed to pay for the plane ticket... Slowly, they crept over, thinking to themselves, ‘...Am I doing this?’

Their grip shakes for a moment, trembling with anxiety- anger, sadness...every emotion at once swirling inside like a broiling soup, ready to boil over...They took a photo of the credit card- front to back, and slipped it back into his wallet.

‘...I have no choice.’

In one blink, they were upstairs. The next, purchasing the next plane ticket out of there. The next, slipping out of their room and onto the lower roof of their 2 floored house. The next, running down the street and down to the bus stop. The next, in an airport. And the next...they were gone. Over the course of the next...several hours...All of this occurred within the next day or so, even if everything felt like a blur. There was anxiety flooding through their veins, slowly breathing in and out. Looking down while seated in the plane, they noted the transfer papers in their lap. A normal, public high school. They did it. They got out. They were free of everything. Of a shitty, unsupportive home life… of friends who only used them for the money they had, and talked shit behind their back...of the work that dragged them rugged...they were free.

They were finally, finally....free.

....And slowly, just like that, the awareness came back. The feeling of their hands, their legs, and the emotions that came from those memories.

‘That’s right...I ran away from home to transfer to a normal life...I got a part time job, cut off everyone I knew in the past...and left. It wasn’t even just that my family was...abusive… Or at least at that point, But they were…. Neglectful. Emotionally and mentally neglectful... My father...he didn’t acknowledge how poorly he raised me, forced me to work on my singing abilities even when sick or mentally unwell… put so much pressure on my schoolwork that chores and life-skills took a back seat. My stepmother was transphobic, homophobic...and my mother…’

Their thoughts trailed off for a short moment...before the realization cut their heart in two.

‘I haven’t heard from her since I was 7.’

A crippling feeling of loneliness flooded their thoughts, and they swore they felt warmth trailing down their cheek. They swore they felt this before...they knew this feeling of loneliness, and it felt suffocating. It felt like only until recently...they had never known what it felt like to truly belong somewhere… Shit- they were definitely crying, they felt tears falling off their cheek with what awareness they had of their surroundings, despite their eyes being closed. They tried to reach up, to wipe it off, but they once again felt the tight leather restraints keeping them still.

“Hey, Deep breaths.” A voice cut through the pain. The technician, “How are you feeling right now?”

Their eyes fluttered a bit, and eventually...opened. Their body felt heavy. It took a moment or two to piece together how their tongue worked again, but then they eventually mumbled between nervous clicks of their tongue.

“Shitty, thanks,” They sarcastically muttered, “I’m doing as well as I can be. How long has it been?”

“4 hours.” The technician spoke up, “Do you recollect anything from Hopes Peak yet, Ren?”

“...No.” They took a second to gather their thoughts, slowly shaking their head as slightly as they could to try and clear the feeling of static and prickles that surrounded their headspace, “Just...my childhood.”

“Right. Well, we’re about halfway done. If we tried going past 8 hours...well, we don’t know what sort’ve effect it might have on you.”

The intercom spoke, as they nodded, taking another breath. They had stopped crying by now.

“How does this equipment work again?” They were a bit curious now, and it's not like they were really paying attention earlier when he probably was explaining it to them. The sigh he gave confirmed this suspicion, and while quietly smothering the instant guilt in their stomach that came with feeling like a burden for making him repeat himself, he spoke.

“It basically delivers electromagnetic waves through your ears and to your brain, and depending on the frequency we put through these waves, it will help drudge up any forgotten memories...That is to say, it is impossible to ‘steal’ memories persay- but with the right technology, repressing them very deeply into your mind is very possible. It takes very miniscule, very specific triggers to drudge them back to the surface. That’s what the humming is- the electromagnetic waves,” He explained, “However, we cannot select what you do and don’t remember...and given you have ADHD, what you do recall can vary greatly. You still might not remember as much as most of your classmates, hence why yours is taking that much longer compared to your peers.”

“ADHD...of course this is the first I’m hearing of it,” They noted, spite in their tone, “Gotta have a word with that shrink later.” Even if, thinking of it then, ADHD clicked perfectly with how they acted and their personality.

“Soren, please do not nearly break the arm of another psychologist.”

The technician’s exasperation was heard in his tone, watching the brunette’s dark eyes blink up towards where he was sitting in the window. He was holding what, they could only imagine, was yet another coffee. A small stack sat on the desk next to him.

“Nah, I won’t…” They responded, hiding a hint of a chuckle at his tone...They were about to ask another question before quickly giving the slightest shake of their head to brush it off, “Anyway, let’s keep going, yeah?”

“Right. Ready to go back under? Now, I won’t be able to speak to you again until after the procedure ends. While you’re under, you’re technically unconscious, but after each memory ends- you’re briefly brought back to a slight sense of consciousness to give your head a break. Understand?”

“Gotcha, doc.” Their tone was thick with drowsiness, the slight irish drawl slipping between pursed lips. They were sleepy already… What time was it?

“Right...Good luck, Mx.”

The hum started back up as he spoke, growing louder until his voice was drowned out altogether. One breath in...One breath out...And their head went slack once more as they fell unconscious.

–☆–

How is it someone like them got accepted here again?

They honestly had no clue. Extensive testing, sure, they were a decent learner...but their emotional capabilities were apparently one to behold. Sure, they knew they helped a student down and away from suicide, but honestly? Anyone could really do that. Either way, after further examination, they were the designated ‘Ultimate Empath’...Jeez, what the HELL were they doing here?

‘But I mean...if those rumors I heard are true, I’ll be set for life,’ They thought to themselves, shyly posted up in the main hall- watching slowly students trickle in of all ages, ‘And I don’t want to work a part-time job for the rest of my life.’

Some were talking amongst themselves, others kept to themselves but...they were amongst the latter, arms nervously crossed over their torso. Amongst orientation, they would be introduced to the classes specifically picked for each individual student, and fitted into proper ‘Hopes Peak’ uniforms….you know, the same ones no one seemed to really wear- if the appearance of some upperclassmen were any indication.

But they, personally? They didn’t want to make themselves too known within the class. After all, they knew there were missing posters for their deadname so if they weren’t careful…

‘I can’t go back home. I can’t. But also...do I really belong here?’

Looking around, the energy of everyone seemed so...so different...compared to them. So much stronger, mentally and physically. Confident. Cheerful. Perfect.

‘...Maybe I shouldn't be here.’ Their thoughts started walking away with them as they slowly started backing over towards the door…

Only to run into someone- causing both of them to start to stumble.

“Eep-!”

“Whoa!”

They felt the person behind them, though, trip, and suddenly, they were on the floor, on top of this poor unfortunate soul. A few moments of silence pass, a few classmates piping in, asking if they were both okay, before Ren slowly sat up, rubbing their head… only to realize they probably nearly crushed the person below them, and jumping up to their feet.

“Oh my gods, I'm so sorry!” Their voice came out as a shrill squeak, slightly muffled as their hands clasped over their mouth in anxious surprise.

“Ah, jeez-” The boy in question they watched as he rubbed the back of his head, “I-it’s alright, really… Should’ve watched what was in front of me.” He laughed softly, and they looked away.

They wouldn’t lie...he was pretty cute.

“D-did you just walk in? I-I mean, it’s normal not to notice me...I’m pretty short.” They asked and explained themselves, fiddling with their fingers.

“Yeah, I did...and believe me-” He got up himself, standing not much taller than the brunette in question, probably around 5’2”-5’3” or so compared to their 4’10”, “I’m...Not much better in terms of height.”

There was a bewildered silence for a few moments, before the two in question bursted into a small fit of laughter, doubled over in their fit of snickers. As a result, they relaxed a bit, calming down around this boy.

“I’m guessing you’re also in my class then?” They asked, wiping away a small tear from their eye.

“Yeah, actually. What’s your name?” Olive eyes met their own, and they tried everything in their being to keep from squeaking shyly at the eye contact.

“N-Name’s Soren. U-Ultimate Empath. And you?” They offered a hand to him, despite themselves. The boy in question chuckled, taking their hand in his own and giving a soft squeeze as he shook their hand.

“Makoto Naegi...I-I’m the Ultimate Lucky Student, apparently.” He spoke, awkwardly scratching at the back of his neck. Ren tilted their head, curious.

“Luck student? How the hell do you measure luck…?” They asked, obliviously. Makoto sighed, looking a bit downcast, and they could practically see the insecurity written in his body language and face.

“It’s a long story...But honestly, it’s...kinda ridiculous.” He mumbled, “Not sure if someone like you would wanna hear about it.”

“No, no.” They quickly shook their head, not retracting their hand and instead putting their other hand on his, leaning a bit closer with intrigue written on their features, “I wanna know… If you’re comfortable talking about it, of course. I mean…” They tilted their head, “It’s weird feeling different from the other Ultimates, huh?”

His eyes widened, caught off guard, “How did you…” They grinned a bit, a soft smile, “Empath, remember? I can sense your distress about being here...I can sense your nerves. You don’t...feel like you belong, do you?” They asked.

Makoto blinked for a few moments, eyes searching theirs for any sign of joking, before sighing and relaxing a bit. Right.

“Spot on, I guess. Alright, alright, I’ll spill. But you best not tell anyone else, okay?” Makoto put a finger to his lips, a curl of a joking smirk on their face. At that moment, they noticed the faint sprinkling of freckles across his face, the slight dimples in his features when he grinned...Their heart jumped a bit, and they laughed.

“I won’t tell a soul.”

In one blink, there they were talking to Makoto, and in the next…

“Ren?” Looking over, they found themselves in a different environment. They were seated outside, underneath a tree, with a few other girls around them. If memory serves right…

‘This is Chihiro, Celestia, and Asahina.’ Their memory clicked perfectly back together.

“Hey!” It was Hina talking, “Dude, are you okay? You were spacing out pretty hard there.”

Ren blinked a bit, before shyly chuckling and looking away, “Ah, yeah, I’m okay. That just...tends to happen.”

Hina blinks a bit before shaking her head, “Well, yeah, clearly. You should really get that checked out you know! If you can’t even focus on food, how will you be able to focus in class?! I mean, midterm exams are coming up soon you know.”

“...A Lot of studying.” They chuckled nervously, biting their nails, “Still, I just have a lot on my mind lately, I guess.”

“A- A-lot on your mind?” Chihiro spoke up, blinking and leaning a bit closer towards Ren, “D-does it have to do w-with studying?” “...No, I wouldn’t say that…” They mumbled, shyly, looking down at their food and taking a shy bite.

‘How can I tell them everything that goes on in my head? How can I tell them that it's a fight everyday to survive? How can I explain...that something’s wrong with me?’

Simply put, they couldn’t. They managed a small smile and chuckled.

“Just thinking of boys, I guess.” They quickly averted the actual subject- unknowing of them setting themselves up for disaster.

“Oooh?” Asahina got a mischievous grin on her face, “Any particular boys?”

Their face flushed...it was no secret to any of them that they, simply put, were a bit smitten.

“Noooooo….?” They lied through their teeth, even if their goofy grin gave them away.

“Not even a particular luckster?” Celeste leaned in a bit, joining in on the teasing with her own little devilish grin, giggling quietly as the brunette interrogated squeaked shyly and hid their face in their hands, the image of the Ultimate in question immediately flooding their thoughts.

“Nooo!!!” They tried to protest, shaking their head rapidly. The group of girls giggled, Chihiro wrapping an arm around the brunette’s neck in an attempt to reassure them.

“You’re going to have to ask him out eventually, you know, before Sayaka beats you to it.” Asahina said with a cheeky grin. Their smile faltered slightly.

“No, no. I shouldn’t meddle...I’d feel bad.”

“Even if he clearly has no romantic interest in her?” Celeste spoke up, red eyes widening a bit, “That is to say, I’ve only seen him so starstruck around you particularly, my dear.”

Ren’s face flushed even brighter, biting their lip shyly, “Noo, he definitely wouldn’t want someone like me…” Their self consciousness was starting to show, “I mean, I’m just a nosy empath with gender issues. Sayaka is...a literal popstar.”

“And? Popstar or no, you still have something special about you that Naegi senses! Cmon, Ren, be a bit more confident in yourself!” Hina rebutted, determination glittering in her bright blue eyes before giggling and shoving a baked treat into her mouth.

“I-I’m plenty confident in myself!” ‘I...I think.’ They left that last bit out, looking away to bite their lip in uncertainty.

The rest of the girls shared a mutual doubtful, somewhat concerned look, before shaking their heads.

“Tell us that when you manage to ask Naegi out yourself, dear.” Celeste concluded, delicately eating at some sparse vegetables she had served herself, smiling sweetly towards her.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” They huffed, blushing with a slight pout as they idly drank at the sugary drink that sat next to them. It tasted sweet, and reminded them of peaches… Peach soda. Huh.

Still, looking over to the tree next to them, they spotted Makoto amongst some of the guys- laughing alongside Ishimaru, Sayaka, Kyoko, and Yasuhiro...and found their heart sinking a bit in their chest.

‘He’d...never fall for someone like me. It’s not like I’m extraordinary or anything… I’m not like the rest of the Ultimates here.’ They thought to themselves, feeling their mood start to shift. However, the next moment, his eyes met theirs and he smiled, offering a shy wave- and they felt their heart start to race all over again.

‘...Still. I’ll...I’ll stay hopeful for it. It never hurts to dream, right?’

Slowly, the memory faded into nothing once more, and while they didn’t open their eyes again, they felt the sense of their surroundings return once again.

‘Hopes Peak Academy...I never expected I’d get in, especially while I was a runaway...but when I did, it changed my life. For the first time I had friends. I had people I cared about...but at the time, I was so wrapped up in my own trauma, in my own depression...I just didn’t notice. I thought I was alone..’ They thought to themselves, a curl of a small smile on their features, ‘...And my love for Makoto...it goes even beyond the Killing School Life...Gods, Hina isn’t going to let me live THAT down anytime soon if she remembers that.’

Still...there was something about knowing their classmates...truly KNOWING their classmates now, compared to back then...that hurt their heart even more.

‘...They all deserved so much better… None of them deserved to die. None of them deserved to be murdered...none of them deserved to suffer the way we all did. I hope they’re doing okay in the everafter…’

Still, as sweet as the memory was, they had to continue. They had to keep going down memory lane. And, it seemed everyone else agreed, as the electromagnetic humming started once again, filling their head with noise. This one felt more abrupt, more sharp, and suddenly they were groaning in pain a bit. Whatever was going on, it hurt...it actually really, really hurt-

“I-Is...is everything...okay??” They managed to open an eye slightly… Only to notice the panic in the technician’s faces. Was something going wrong??? Why did this hurt so badly and all of a sudden- it felt like their head might burst from the pain that came from the sound.

...They had little time to ask, as within the next moment the world spun back into oblivion once again.

–☆–

“Soooooreeeen~!”

A cheerful voice brought them to their senses, a thin thumb running over their cheek and wiping a tear from their eyes.

“Hey, are you listening to yourself?” Junko. One of Ren’s newer friends- though she’s been the most honest to them about everything going on.

“I-I ah….s-sorry. I guess I was rambling again, huh?” They looked over to her. They were sitting in an abandoned classroom, the blonde in question was sitting on one of the desks, looking down at them through empty, crystalline eyes.

“Yeah, you were totally out of it.” She chuckled, a smirk on her face, “I can’t believe how heartbroken you look, but honestly? It’s really cute.”

“Oh shutup-” They blushed a bit, looking away, “I-It’s...it’s nothing.”

“Oh really? Even though Makoto is going on what’s totally a date with Sayaka?” Junko leaned into their face, “It’s okay to feel that, y’know? It’s totally okay to let those feelings manifest into something quite...gorgeous. Wouldn’t you agree? It’s like you said, right?” “...There's beauty in everything. Even the worst bits of life…Even in the pain.” They repeated, another tear falling down their cheek.

“There we go… It’s really sad, how you’re literally the side character to your own life, you know? How often Asahina and the others just go off on their own without you?...Well, at least I’m here, you know?” Junko grinned a bit as they nodded, slowly.

“Yeah…”

“Junko...We do have a plan to discuss, you know…” A voice caught both of their attention, and looking towards the corner of the room, Mukuro Ikusaba. A sweet girl with dark black hair and another array of freckles. If they weren’t so bent out of shape with Makoto, honestly Mukuro was also very cute…

“Oh shutup!” Junko’s high pitch voice cut through their gay thoughts, quickly looking back to the blonde, “Anyway, let’s go over the plan I came up with! Alright?”

“Okay…” Mukuro nodded quietly, submitting to her sister’s behavior once again with a passive smile. This seemed to be quite the pattern with these two, and Ren wondered if all siblings acted like this...

“So, I heard some super super secret news about how this whole...event that happened at the school is only going to get worse,” Junko explained, “But with the rest of the outside world. We’re pretty sure that the school will lock up a bunch of us in here, and we want to make things that much more fun for everyone.”

“...Okay…?” Ren raised an eyebrow, concerned.

“We want you to be the one to get back at them.”

“Huh?”

“You know!! Beat up everyone who keeps abandoning you! Your so called ‘friends’ and your ‘crush’ who abandon you when you need them the most? The ones who clearly couldn’t care less about you? Don’t you want to get back at them?” Junko leaned in towards Ren, who bit their lip, shaking their head.

“N-No...No of course not...I-I mean, they have lives of their own, they shouldn’t have to pay all their attention to me all the time…”

“Even when they clearly forget about you all the time? When you almost killed yourself at the end of last year?” Junko’s eyes stared into Ren’s soul, and they felt...almost violated by the eye contact.

“...E-even so...I-I wouldn’t hurt them…”

“So what are you gonna do? Turn tail and run back to Ireland? Back to your family?” They still don’t know HOW Junko found out about their past- as far as everyone else knew, they were just an Ireland transfer student.

“...N-No, of course not.”

“So, you’ll stay. And play our game.” Junko smiled, “Okay?”

“I…”

“I wouldn’t want something...devastating happening to your dear Naegi, would you?” Junko’s grin turned almost sadistic as she spoke, harshly grabbing their face, “So, you’ll play our game, right?”

Their heart stopped...if Makoto was going to put in danger.......no, they’d do anything in their power to make sure that happened, even if- for the time being- they had to play along.

“...Yes...yes of course.” They mumbled, cheeks squished.

“Good! Besides, it’s not like you’re killin’ em or anything! Not unless you wanna, then of course I’ve got your back on that!” Junko chuckled a bit, letting go of their face, watching as they rubbed their cheeks.

“I-I’d...I’d never kill anyone…”

“Oh dear, we’ll see.”

Junko got up from her seat, slowly approaching Ren and cornering them in their chair.

“J-Junko?...” Their eyes widened, “What are you doing?”

“Hmm...I just want to show you something. Is that okay?” The blonde grinned, tilting their chin up, “After that, we can further discuss this prank of ours.”

“...N-Noo…?” They had a bad feeling about it, but Junko didn’t seem to listen. They quickly got up to leave, they suddenly didn’t feel safe in the room alone with her- but they felt their arm yanked back, and pinned back into the next desk.

“J-Junko-!”

The blondes bright eyes appeared in their vision next, her grin a bit sharper than it probably should be.

“Mukuro, hold them down, I want to watch how they react to this video…”

...Something happened during that day. Something that...even to their mind's eye, was fuzzy. They remembered that they started crying again at one point, they remember they felt violated- but they didn’t know why. They don’t remember what happened. They don’t remember how they felt after- or if they even felt anything...But all they could recall after was a faint whisper of a voice, menacing yet dripping with faux sweetness.

“You’ll make them all pay for what they did to you, right?”

“Yes, Junko.”

…

“Junko?”

“Ohmygod- Yeeees?”

“...Let my memory get erased too. I promise I’ll still follow up on my deal. I...I’ll still have my anger, I’ll still have that aggression. I promise. Just...wipe my memory alongside everyone else. So I don’t spill our little secret. Okay?”

“....Fine.”

–☆–

In that brief moment, they suddenly jolted upright- body trembling and a pained gasp leaving their lungs. They- they couldn’t breathe all of a sudden, and everything suddenly felt so loud-

The primary technician who ran the whole ordeal ran inside, quickly detaching the device and kneeling down in front of Ren.

“Soren?! Hey, can you hear me?!” No. No they couldn’t. All they could think about was how sick they felt, how suddenly suicidal they felt. Were they drowning? Why couldn’t they breathe?!

‘I agreed to hurt people for Junko...S-she manipulated me...she hurt me...to get me to play her game. To keep me from leaving before shit hit the fan...Fuck. Fuck, if I followed through on any of her ideas…To think I agreed to HER game- God I’m a fucking idiot!’ Their thoughts were running at a thousand miles an hour, struggling to breathe. Their hands were tugging desperately on their restraints, unsure if they wanted to hold their throat in attempts to try and breathe again, or if they wanted to claw at their arms until they bled.

They shook their head violently, and in the next moment- with little warning aside from their stomach doing a complete 180- doubled over in their chair and threw up right into their lap. The technician, alarmed, quickly rang up their psychologist who was a few floors down, to provide assistance.

Everything in their vision swam. They conspired with Junko to hurt people. They conspired with Junko...they...they enabled the Killing Game before it even started.

They puked again. They felt like they might throw up their lungs next, at this rate.

Why were they alive? Why did they have to be the one alive?! They kept making one mistake after another- and this just proved it! This just proved how fucked up they were. How dangerous they were to others.

“Ren- Ren, tell me what you saw!” The technician grabbed their shoulders, trying to get them to focus. Their trashing just got worse. “No! No- No let go of me! Let go of me! I- I can’t breathe- oh my god what did I do!?” Their voice was hoarse from the acidic bile in their throat, struggling not to get sick even more.

“What did you see?! What did you recall?!” The technician kept trying to talk to them, which only resulted in overwhelming them all the more. The last thing they can completely remember after abruptly waking up from their memory revitalization- was screaming at the top of their lungs. They just wanted to die- they didn’t deserve to live for working with Junko- for working with despair. Frankly, they wished they had died instead of recalling anything at all.

They…frankly don’t remember the next hour or so. They remember faces, eyes, voices speaking to them...a needle being put into their arm…

And soon, they calmed down a bit, feeling sluggish and heavy. Everything felt a bit fuzzy at the edges of their mind as the screaming- both physically and mentally- all but stopped.

‘Sedatives,’ The thought connected briefly, before the word escaped them altogether in the cloud of drugs. Their psychologist helped them to their feet-- when did they get onto the floor of the laboratory?-- and out of the lab.

Being barely supported under their arm, they basically dragged their feet back to their shared apartment room within their sector’s building with Makoto. Their psychologist stuck by their side until they were able to walk easier, before heading off to schedule a few more appointments in the very near tomorrow. They had a feeling they’d be busy tomorrow, if they even had the energy to get up.

They remember looking at the time...But they don’t remember what it was. Late, they figured. They stumbled inside, nearly falling on their face as they held their head, still trying to wrap their mind around everything they remembered.

The slight shifting from one of the rooms in the apartment got their attention though, and within another blink Makoto was at their side- helping them stand up a bit and trying to help them into bed. His mouth moved, and they acknowledged that he was saying something to them...but it took a few moments before anything he said actually was heard by them. When they were, they looked up a bit more at him, to which he sighed.

“What happened?” He asked them, eyebrows furrowed in concern. Their eyes watered a bit, mumbling a quiet, ‘I’m so so sorry...I’m… I failed everyone here…’

“Failed? Ren?” He sat them down, clasping their hand, “You had the memory recovery procedure today right? What happened?”

“...I-I can’t...I can’t tell you.” They mumbled, eyes squeezed shut, “You’d hate me. Everyone would...I-I can’t… I can’t take it…” They shook their head, breathing starting to go shallow again as Makoto quickly waved his hands in mild panic.

“Hey, hey, calm down, calm down! It’s going to be okay. Y-you don’t need to talk about it right now, okay? Everything’s okay.” He reassured them, concerned and slightly panicked, “I could never hate you, Ren…” “...” They wanted to scream, they wanted to explain everything to those eyes, they wanted to prove him wrong. They wanted to prove that they should be hated, especially after what they’ve done...but they just felt too tired. They felt too scared...they felt too insecure to admit to it.

“Just rest for now, okay? I’ll bring you some water, and..” He noticed how stained their clothes were, and his nervous smile faltered, “And a change of clothes, apparently, yikes… Do you need anything else?”

“...Medication…” They mumbled quietly, tossing off their shirt and pants without much mind to it, “Please…”

“...Right, okay.” He faltered a bit and quickly looked away from their frame, getting back to his feet, “You rest up for a bit, and I’ll...I’ll get what you need, okay?”

“Okay…” “I love you…” ‘You wouldn’t if you knew what I did…’

Laying down, they felt their eyes flutter as the sedatives further kicked in, feeling their consciousness start to slip…

“I love you too.”

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fanaticwritings · 5 years

Text

smoke and mirrors [chapter 1]

The Streetcar named desire

pairing: tom holland x fem!reader

word count: 2k

warnings: smut, profanity

updates: saturdays!

a/n: i am reuploading this fic cause tumblr messed up big time the first time. anyway, i didn't plan on writing a lot of smut but my hand slipped (oops) so please don't read after the warning if you're underage. also, others, let me know if I should include more of it! happy reading!

___

You hummed sleepily as you felt warmth encompass you; the warmth undoubtedly being Tom's body. You felt his chest press against your back, felt his arm slide under your stomach and pull you close.

"Mornin' love," you mumbled into the pillow.

You didn't really want to wake up. Tom's touch, the covers, his room were all too warm and far too comforting. For a moment you could pretend you didn't have responsibilities and expectations to live up to. It was just you and him. Him and you. A perfect forever.

You were almost drifting off again when you felt Tom's fingers push one of your bra straps aside and then, a moment later, his plump lips kiss your shoulder.

"Morning," he whispered hoarsely, kissing a trail towards your neck, before turning you towards himself.

You blinked open one eye, gazing at his hazy form sleepily. "I don't want to be awake yet."

Tom reached over to run his hand down your back. It was a soft gesture but you knew what he was up to. You blinked a couple of more times, albeit reluctantly as Tom's face cleared before you. His curls were in complete disarray, eyes crusty from sleeping in and lips puckered in a funny way. And yet, there were fewer things in the world, more adorable than him in this moment.

Completely disregarding your comment, Tom decided to slide on top of you.

You groaned in mock dismay as he settled down on you because you had to admit, the pressure felt wonderful.

"Tom, what in the-," you began but were cut off by his lips gently pressing against your own.

Morning cuddles were a daily ritual with Tom. You never got enough of them.

"I'm so lucky," he murmured once you broke apart. He was now half on top of you and half on the bed, one arm propping his head up beside your own.

He looked at you fondly then, trailing a lazy finger down the length of your arm.

You brushed a curl of his hair aside, smiling.

"Oh, so we're in that mood today."

"What mood?"

"The I'm-going-to-melt-Y/N-with-my-words mood."

He smiled. "I'm always in the mood for that, love," he retorted, squeezing your waist, which was where his hand now rested.

"As much as I'd love to stay and hear everything you have to say about me, I- we- have work to do," you sighed, caressing his cheek gently.

The reluctance with which you said it was even more evident when you didn't move to shift from under him. Not your fault, he was mesmerizing. God he looked beautiful above you; freckles and curls galore.

"I hear ya," he whispered, nodding as his fingers slipped inside your underwear.

You gasped. The nerve.

You slapped his arm gently, almost wanting to give in to his obvious desire but, but, work.

He pouted at you, clearly disappointed.

"You could spare two minutes. I promise I won't take long," he mused, suppressing a grin. You noticed that his fingers were still resting on your hip bone.

Why, o' heaven's above, did this man have to make everything so difficult?

"You wish," you said, biting down your lip to stop yourself from blushing at his cheekiness. You shifted a little under him, trying to find wriggle room to escape.

"Get off!," you huffed, when he didn't budge.

Tom looked at you for a long moment and then sighed, lifting himself off of you and sliding onto the bed.

"When will I see you next?" he asked, as you rose from the bed and headed towards the shower.

"Tonight."

"That's a," he glanced at the tiny alarm clock on the bedside table, "- whole fourteen fucking hours."

You looked at him for a moment, his puppy eyes almost getting the better of you. But two years was good practice enough and you shook your head. Besides, it was fun to watch him suffer.

"Patience, Holland."

Some days at the Corp were just plain boring. Nothing of consequence happened on such days, you had to merely sit through the whole day, attending meeting after meeting to discuss short plans. These meetings you could easily avoid but you were a dedicated worker.

The Corp was where it was today because you had never slackened.

After finishing the third meeting for the day, you settled back into your office, scanning through your mail to reply to some of the pending ones.

Just as you hit send on one of the replies, there was a knock on the door.

"Hey," Lucas Valdez, your PA, entered holding a large number of envelopes. You smiled at him as he placed them on your desk.

"Thanks. How'd the date go yesterday?"

"He was a total bore," he said, shaking his head in disappointment and his curls flopped on his head.

"Aw, I'm sorry! Don't worry, you'll find someone nice soon," you said, handing him a few files. "Also could you please send these to Lopez, Sharma and Phil for me? I need them to meet me."

Lucas nodded in confirmation and politely left.

You decided to go through the post as well because it was a boring day anyway and nothing could possibly bore you more.

You quickly leafed through them; a couple of advertisements, a few job applications (you kept those aside) and one small, plain envelope. There was no name on it, no stamp.

Huh. Strange.

You grabbed the letter opener and sliced the envelope open. A smaller piece of paper slid out of it.

The material looked quite expensive and vaguely familiar. Your eyebrows furrowed as you picked it up. It felt like it was an office paper but you couldn't be sure.

You turned it over. Written in a perfect, cursive handwriting and neon red ink were the words:

"Nothing is as it seems."

Something you know too well with the secrets you keep,

As you sow, so shall you reap,

Learn, lest you fall,

Beware, take from you, I will all.

You read it once, twice.

Now, you were a pretty famous public figure. Getting hate mail was a part of the job description but that didn't make it any easier.

The poem left you feeling just as uncomfortable as others had before. Nevertheless, this was still new. People were rarely this poetic in them.

What secrets were they talking about? If they meant you and Tom..

As if on cue, your personal phone chimed with an incoming notification.

Tom <3

I'm at your place.

Fourteen hours. I'm counting.

You smiled in spite of yourself and clicked the phone off, deciding to leave him on read. More the suffering, the better.

You glanced back at the note, the uneasiness settling over you once again. What could they be possibly talking about? If it was a hate mail it was unnervingly vague. And if it was someone's idea of a cruel joke, it was working.

Just then someone knocked at your door again and you hastily pocketed the note. It was Lopez, Phil and Sharma.

You blinked at them, struggling for a split second to remember why they were here.

Get a hold of yourself.

You smiled, recalling that you were the one who had asked for them. As they say down and began talking, you did your best to push the words to a far corner of your mind, the left side of your pants feeling strangely heavy.

[smut warning]

You found Tom in the living room that was attached to the kitchen, talking to someone on the phone. He motioned to you that he'd take a couple of minutes and you nodded, slipping inside the kitchen.

Your cook had, as always, laid out a scrumptious meal for you and Tom to down. You had barely opened the lid to the first bowl when Tom called from behind you.

"Your fourteen hours are up, Miss."

You turned to him, holding the bowl of pasta in hand. He was dressed in a plain white tee and your favorite grey sweatpants.

"I've still got half an hour left," you said nonchalantly, picking one piece of pasta and popping it into your mouth.

Tom watched you chew it slowly. It was completely involuntary that you let out a moan at the warmth that spread through your chest; you were actually famished.

"That's it, you little shit," Tom muttered under his breath and the next thing you knew you were being pushed against the counter, Tom's hands working down your body in a frenzy. He unbuttoned your shirt faster than you could process and chucked it to the floor. In another swift motion, he pulled off his own shirt as well before pulling you close again. His lips slammed against your own and then you couldn't really think at all. You moaned as he ground his hips into you, his hardening length pressing against your abdomen. You let your hands wander to his hair as he continued to grind into you, your knees already giving way under you. Warmth filled the base of your stomach as you slackened against him, mouth hanging open and eyes fluttering shut.

Just as your hands moved to his neck, he stopped, dragging his lips to your ear.

"I'm going to finish what I started and you're not going to say a thing," he grunted, his voice dropping low.

Before you could respond however, he'd turned you around and pushed you further up against the counter. You could feel him press against you, your shoulder blades digging into the hard muscle of his chest.

He thrust one hand into your pants and under your panties, fingers finding your wetness immediately.

His lips attached themselves to your neck and then he began to work you.

You moaned loudly as his middle and index finger dipped inside your already aching core and began to scissor their way through. His lean fingers knew exactly how and what to do and you immediately collapsed against him, groaning. He twisted and squeezed at your clit as his lips sucked hard on the skin of your shoulder. A flick of his wrist made you buck against him and you heard a deep chuckle rumble behind you.

Fuck.

Tom loved marking you. It wasn't good sex until you'd woken up with a few hickeys all over your back and chest.

Meanwhile, his other hand had unhooked one half of your bra and cupped your breast, thumb playing with your nipple. Your senses were in overdrive. You could smell his cologne; hear him panting in your ear as he pushed against you; feel his touch inside you. And God, nothing had ever felt this good.

You groaned as his fingers worked their magic, sliding further up and towards the spot he knew would tear you down. He moved faster now, the friction pushing you closer and closer towards the edge just as he started grinding against you again.

The sensation was a bit too much and you weren't even aware of the moans that tumbled out of your mouth as you gripped the back of his head and fucked his fingers. You bit down on your lip, to stop yourself from screaming his name.

"Come for me, darling," he whispered, his voice dripping with lust, fingers moving with a pace you couldn't keep up with.

And just like that, the ground slipped from beneath you, the world erupting in colors before your eyes.

"Fuck," you moaned as pleasure rattled through your body. You spasmed as Tom's fingers slowed their movement; stopping all together as you came down from your high, panting heavily.

"I had to wait fourteen hours to do that. Told you you were missing out," he said as you leaned against the sink, still breathless. You watched him saunter back to the living room and plop onto the couch casually, as if he hadn't just fucked you senseless.

You adjusted your pants and shirt, discarding your bra altogether. You reckoned you wouldn't really need it now. Legs still wobbly, you walked over to him and sat down on his lap, straddling him.

He looked up at you, eyes still dark and hair an absolute mess.

"I'm sorry you had to wait, baby. Let me make it up to you," you murmured locking your lips with his, the tiny note inside your left pant pocket, long forgotten.

___

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