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chalkrevelations · 3 years

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Huh.

Well, this is not the next episode reaction you were expecting, but a while back, in the middle of the night, while I was ready to cry from working on a pharmacology paper, out of nowhere, Youtube threw up Street Dance of China S3 Ep1 at me. And yeah. I am, admittedly, f’kn weak for a dance show. (There are enough SYTYCD episode reax on my old Livejournal that I feel there’s no point denying this.)

So – no, actually, wait. FIRST of all, I do NOT believe the “towel vote” we ended up being given for the opening routines from the four captains. That was the most blatant bit of bullshit chicanery I’ve seen in my LIFE, and I say this as a person with a ton of SYTYCD episode reax on my old Livejournal, and I also say this not because Wang Yibo ended up last (well, not entirely), but because I saw Wallace Chung’s routine. As someone closer in age to him than to the other three captains, I have to give him props for trying, but come on, man. The critique that Yibo got from random contestants – if the subtitles are to be believed, so I realize this needs a grain of salt - basically boiled down to “it was too good for the stage lighting.” :hands: Also, I saw your face at the reveal, Wallace, and you were as shocked as I was. No way you got more towels/votes than Wang Yibo. Not unless there’s some super wild undercurrent of nostalgia propping you up, which, I guess could happen, because literally all I know about pop culture in China, current or otherwise, is filtered through Tumblr and Youtube, both notoriously suspect, but … anyway. There’s got to be a TON of behind-the-scenes manipulation going on for Yibo to be rock-bottom with last pick of teams but then also to end up with THAT pool of possibles. Are you kidding me with this?

ANYWAY, what I wanted to say is that I actually really like Wang Yibo here, and it’s not just because he’s the only captain I have even a sliver of familiarity with, and it’s not just because Lan Wangji was banging Wei Wuxian. I do realize all of this is influenced by whatever edit they’ve decided to give a particular captain or contestant, but I’m impressed with the way Yibo immediately starts team building by getting his group into a warmup, getting them dancing together, getting them dancing with him before they have to worry about dancing for him. (I mean, come on, Jackson Wang. The way to get people to stop being nervous is not to say “Stop being nervous! It will make you fuck up!”) The way Yibo immediately recognized and responded to his group’s concerns about that one dude copying someone else’s routine probably also bought him a lot of return investment. He’s dressed to work it, in his sweats and his flannel (what IS that fake-leather TAC vest and random leg holster-looking thing, Jackson Wang?). He’s convincing me he really loves to dance, he can’t hold still while he watches the contestants, he’s wandering over into other captains’ turf when it sounds like there’s a dancer performing who he might like to see, he’s being the best Yibo he can be, and I’m grooving along, wind in my hair, totally down for this ride. He’s also adorable at the beginning when all the other captains are like, my goal for this season is to slaughter the competition and dance on their graves! And he’s like, well, I’d like to … make some friends? And learn some new stuff? I don’t know if the perpetual Humble Student schtick is natural or persona, or whether it’s general or specific to dancing, but it’s working for you, my dude. This is also made better (read: ironic), by the fact that it’s immediately before the towel reveal, when he flips over to utter disbelief and gets all sulky for a while over the “fact” that his dance routine got the least votes.

Also, OH WAIT. This is where that clip of Yibo dancing with his crew ALL OVER HIM came from that I saw floating around a few months ago, isn’t it? You’re telling me those guys had never danced together before and had like, three minutes to throw together that routine? I’m even more impressed than before. Meanwhile, the towels symbolize courage and challenge, Mr. Emcee? OK, fine, cheesy reality show blah blah whatever. Can we get to the dancing now?

I’m going to put the rest of this behind a cut, because it got super long, because it turns out, when you watch in 5-minute increments, it takes two and a half weeks to get through a single episode, but you actually can see and have opinions on all 5,328 contestants, plus every single one of the captains’ battles. Meanwhile, I’m trying to convince myself this is not going to be another series of episode reactions, but 1) I do have the benefit of not having a ton of hometown media giving me a next-day play-by-play, so even though this is six months old, everything’s a surprise; 2) I am, admittedly, f’kn weak for a dance show; and 3) it’s easy to watch in 5-minute increments between researching drug interactions in hypothetical hypertensive patients with stable ischemic heart disease, erectile dysfunction, and seasonal allergies. So, I guess we’ll see. It’ll be slow going, though, because I don’t ever have two and half hours to sit down and watch an ep cover-to-cover – if it happens, it will likely keep happening in 5-minute increments. Meanwhile, there is a metric shit-ton of nattering below the cut, so caveat lector. No, seriously, I kept adding to this little by little until it became a monster. Hashtag long post (remorseful).

OK, I am generally out of my depth here, as this is not at all my area of dance not-really-expertise, but some reactions:

Team Wang Yibo: I can see why he didn’t want to choose between Colin and Dian Men – Colin might have been a touch better technically and a better showman, but Dian Men didn’t seem to have a single wasted move – but, also, my dude. Yibo. You maybe should look a little bit less stunned and overwhelmed by the mere presence of Colin, it’s giving me ideas about your taste in men. Continuing with the powerhouses, I probably shouldn’t even attempt to critique Klash, but I did feel like he was a bit stiff in some of his footwork; that final V kick, though, shit, that’s what having that kind of upper-body strength is for. Bouboo … I mean, excellent flexibility and control, of course, but mainly I’m just terribly amused that Yibo got last pick of teams but somehow ended up with the guy who’s literal world champion, and who’s just as useful for getting into the other captains’ heads – without even trying – as he is for his talent. And then there’s a montage of Yibo giving out towel after towel after towel, and my dude, you cannot keep up this pace. There are still too many dancers to see, and you don’t have that many towels. AAANNNND Towel Battle #1 (See Footnote 1).

Team Jackson Wang: I do like Gai Gai, although that may be influenced by the fact she’s working in the twilight area between hip-hop and contemporary that I have more familiarity with - but also, I suspect she’s pretty good in her genre. I thought Xiao Jie was inconsistent and didn’t stick the landing on his initial attempt, so I have to give you that hesitation, Jackson, even though you’ve somehow ended up the villain in my inner narrative for this show, for no particular reason I can yet discern. Maybe it’s that you’re the direct competition for Yibo’s team in the towel battles. Good enough. Anyway, Xiao Jie definitely stepped up his game for the battle with Bingo, so I can kind of see why both of them got a towel, but we’re not even halfway through this, and most of y’all are giving away towels like you have an endless supply. Yang Kai is a fucking menace with fantastic musicality, and I’m just gonna say it and take the fallout - I think he gave a better performance first time out of the gate than any of Yibo’s powerhouses did. Whatever power Klash has got, whatever skill Bouboo has got, Yang Kai feels more explosive and engaging, at least in these initial showings. He’s going to be one to beat, I’d hug him too, if he was on my team and was going to help me WIN. Yibo’s probably lucky that happened during his little stroll over to check out the competition, so that he can see they’re definitely competitive and be prepared for it. Also, Jackson, I have to admit - that face you made when Chao really kicked in? That was the same face I made, because wt actual f, you have a literal secret weapon – secret because he CAME FROM NOWHERE and NO ONE EVEN KNOWS him, how is that even possible, how did he get that good – fluid, creative, controlled, incredible musicality - without anyone having any idea who he even is? And then there’s a montage of Jackson just giving out towel after towel after towel, and my dude, you need to slow down. You can’t just be like, “THEY LOVE DANCE WITH ALL OF THEIR WHOLE HEARTS!!!!1111!!!!11!” I get it, but everyone there loves dance with all of their whole hearts, and there are not enough towels to send all of them on to the next round. ANNNND, Towel Battle #1 (See Footnote 1).

Team Lay Zhang: lol at how diplomatic you’re being, Lay Zhang – your team’s fierce roar startled you, OK. At this point, I suspect you’re the street most likely to have a knife fight break out before this is all over. I do like Alex, I think he’s got a lot of interesting, super-clean details in his moves, and he’s engaging - I cannot BELIEVE you made him battle that dude whose moves were so mushy, Lay Zhang, it leaves me doubting your ability to judge this thing. At first I thought maybe you were just looking for an excuse because you wanted to see Alex freestyle, but then you actually said something about both dancers being equal, and my estimation of you plummeted, and also sadly, my sound dropped out for the actual battle, including the part where the clearly inferior dancer fell over and then accidentally POPPED ALEX ONE IN THE EYE, and I TOLD YOU SO. I do agree it’s a good idea to make dancers in the same genre do some battling, so you can kind of plan out your towels and put together a team with broad strengths, instead of giving out towels like you’re making it rain for the first 20 contestants, and then you have 1,375 more people to get through, with 3 towels left, as EVERYONE ELSE seems to be doing, so it’s nice that at least one of you guys is thinking – if not actually acting - strategically. That was clearly not even a contest, though, GIVE ALEX HIS TOWEL and send him to the next round. Xiao Bao is hilarious, with his concern that his team captain, who’s into krump, which is “beating,” isn’t going to appreciate his waacking, which is “slapping.” I also don’t know a whole lot about waacking, so thanks for the primer, Xiao Bao, and don’t worry, your performance is just as engaging for those of us who don’t know what we’re watching as you are generally. You deserve that towel for your ability to interact with and engage your audience, alone. Lingo is a good solid performance, although he’s got his team captain strategizing edited over some of it, and here’s the thing: we are 1:56:00 into this, at this point, with another half hour to go, and all of you are starting to disappear into the sea of dancers who are very good at what you do, but at generally the same level? Anyway, Lingo, I approve of your ability to interact with your audience (read: your captain) to ensure engagement, too, so keep that up. Annnd, we actually haven’t seen that much of you guys, but it’s time for Towel Battle #2 (See Footnote 2).

Team Wallace Chung: I’m glad Su Lian Ya insisted on performing, I thought she started off slow but warmed up, and that ending was creepily fantastic and had me spontaneously grinning at the screen in delight. Then we lose sight of this group for a really long time, actually. We go back to find Wallace putting through a couple of urban dancers who we barely see, but who apparently claim to have some choreography experience, and he really likes that. TI shows up, and they’re solid, but honestly, not as good in this performance as they were in some of the stock footage the show threw up to introduce them, but Wallace remains super-excited about the idea of choreography and sends at least choreographer Zhang Jiang Peng through to the next round. And then, we really haven’t seen that much of you guys, either, which maybe doesn’t bode well, but it’s time for Towel Battle #2 (See Footnote 2).

FOOTNOTE 1, aka TOWEL BATTLE ONE, Team Yibo vs. Team Jackson, 3V3 freestyle: First of all, I have to say, I love Yibo - Mr. I Just Wanna Make Some Friends And Have Some Fun - being all, “I have three crappy white towels I’m stuck with for coming in last place that I can’t use to send dancers to the next round and that I DO NOT DESERVE, and I am getting BACK the colorful towels that ARE RIGHTFULLY MINE. I am coming for whoever is in my way.” Team Yibo is Bouboo, Klash, Dian Men, and OK, given what we’ve seen so far, that’s the safe choice, but honestly, I think we’re just taking some things for granted right now, and I’m not sure they actually have given the best performances so far. Yeah, I said it. Team Jackson is Yang Kai, Chao, and Xiao Jie, and … ok, on that last one, I think you probably could have substituted Bingo, but all right. Yang Kai is a definite yes. Chao will be great if he can stay out of his own head and not psych himself out, but given what we’ve seen so far, he’s an obvious pick. First round, Yang Kai vs. Klash, and Yang Kai is still a fucking menace, with super lines. Klash definitely stepped up his game for the battle, and I can’t get over the upper body strength he’s got, to get that kind of airy bounce in his moves, but to be honest, I can’t even be mad the first round went to Yang Kai and Team Jackson. Second round, Yang Kai is still … y’all, the beautiful lines from this guy in his poses, I can’t get over them, but I think he doesn’t have the stamina, his footwork is getting sloppy. Bouboo also steps up his game for an actual battle, his fluidity and control is amazing, and yeah, round to Team Yibo. Round three, Xiao Jie gives it a decent effort, but the polish isn’t there; meanwhile Bouboo is still in champion mode, and I was kind of surprised this was a split vote and went to another round. Xiao Jie absolutely surprised me, coming back stronger on his second try, although I suppose a more familiar genre helped, but Bouboo continues in champion mode. Round four, Chao looks like he’s going to throw up right before he steps out there, and then as soon as the music starts, it’s like, he doesn’t even think. The music just moves him. I feel like his dance vocabulary is more limited than Bouboo’s, though, and Bouboo’s flow is amazing at this point, so I feel like the judges just want to drag this out and see more dancing when we go to one more round. Strong effort all around, but yeah, round four and two towels to Team Yibo. I can’t really complain about that. I do feel like Yibo’s powerhouses have been holding back until now, though, and I’m not sure how I feel about THAT.

FOOTNOTE 2, aka TOWEL BATTLE TWO, Team Zhang vs. Team Wallace, 3V3 w/ captain: lol, Team Zhang really wants someone to pick the Sailor Moon song because they know Xiao Bao and his waacking will tear it up. Anyway, Team Zhang includes Lingo and Xiao Bao, who does not get his Sailor Moon song and continues to be hilarious in his disbelief about being chosen to participate in this battle, when he’s not looking almost as sick as Chao from Team Jackson before HIS performance. Team Wallace includes Su Lian Ya – and honestly, despite how I’m getting ready to bag on him for the entire rest of this battle recap, I like that Wallace put one of his female dancers up there for the battle - and some dude named Ba that they haven’t given us any footage of, up ‘til now, at least that I can remember and who I … don’t even know has been formally given a towel and sent on to the next round, yet? Oh wait, he must have, because there’s talk in the pause for choreography about somehow using the towels during the battle. Wallace relies on Su Lian Ya and Zhang Jiang Peng to choose Ba, and then Ba ends up choreographing a lot of the performance, at least from the edit we see. I continue to feel you may be in over your head, Wallace. This feeling … is not assuaged by your performance in the first round, which is fine, but not really up to the level of almost anyone whose name I’ve bolded so far in this entire recap. Also, using the towels was a cute idea, but it doesn’t translate well, and Team Wallace has a lot of wasted time throwing the towels around instead of actually. You know. Dancing. Lingo gets a credible solo during Team Zhang’s performance, and even though Xiao Bao is clearly lost during a good bit of his backup dancer duties, he manages not to throw up, which – given this team’s general skill level – should be enough to give them the first round, EXCEPT SOMEHOW Team Wallace gets the point from the judges, who then try to justify this inexplicable decision by saying Team Wallace had better interaction, I guess because of the hot mess with throwing the towels around, but adding that Team Zhang was more scattered, which what? More scattered than the hot mess with the towels? I’m not buying this. I can’t tell if they’re propping up Wallace or fucking with Lay Zhang’s head, but I’m having bad acid flashbacks to the many and varied ways dance show judges will try to gaslight you, telling you that things you just saw with your very own eyes did not actually happen when it’s right there! On camera! Visible, despite whatever edit bs you’re pulling! ANYWAY, they’re definitely managing to fuck with not only Lay Zhang’s head, but Xiao Bao’s, and Xiao Bao still doesn’t seem to have his choreography down, but they manage to pull it together enough to take the second round, which to be honest is kind of a muddled mess on everyone’s part. The only one who really stands out to me on this go’round is Su Lian Ya, but OK, Team Zhang might have had it slightly more together as a unit. And then, yeah, OK, I think they were fucking with Lay Zhang’s head, because we then find out that, holy shit, the song the show powers-that-be chose for the tie-breaking third round is that gd Sailor Moon song, and we can all see the writing on the wall. Poor Team Wallace is no match for Xiao Bao, who frankly, carries this entire round on his shoulders without breaking a sweat and barely needs any backup dancers to do it. There’s some ridiculously dramatic reveal of scoring, with the judges dragging out their decisions like this was any actual contest - I’m beginning to suspect that some of them grew up with Wallace Chung posters on their bedroom walls - but finally, round and towel to Team Zhang.

Cut to a little bit of Next Time On, and wow, the first two-and-a-half-hour episode is over, and we aren’t finished with the initial round yet. It’s gonna be Christmas before I make it halfway through this season.

#street dance of china #sdoc episode reax #should i put yibo in the tags for this?#sure #i guess #wang yibo #anyone else?

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shinsorokiri · 4 years

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UA Idol | Chapter One

Hitoshi Shinsou x Reader

Word Count: 2,058

Warnings: Language, big anxiety

A/N: So here’s chapter one! This is the first My Hero fic I’ve ever written and published, so I hope everyone who reads it enjoys it! Now, there’s gonna be a lot of chapters. I’m not sure how many yet, but it will be updated every week, so every Saturday (where I live) is when I will upload! There will also be a tag list, so let me know if you would like to be on it. I have a lot of ideas for this, and I hope I’m able to translate them through writing. Anyways, please enjoy!

UA Idol Masterlist

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You anxiously picked at the number stickered onto your thigh. “Mina, I really don’t think I should be here, this is a lot,” you mumble, motioning your head to the camera crew in front of you setting up. “Oh shush, (Y/n/n). The only reason they’re interviewing us is because we’re cute and are friends and they’re hoping one of us will get through while the other doesn’t and there will be drama, and we both know that if that happens there will only be support. Although I think we’ll both get through. You especially.” You snort at her enthusiasm and shake your head. “Definitely not, but okay. Whatever you say.”

“Okay! Give us your name and where you two are from and if you have any specific reason you’re here.”

“Well, I’m Mina and I’m from Tokyo, and this is (Y/n) and she’s from (hometown). We’re actually roommates and best friends, not to brag, but I’m really here to support her! She’s amazing!”

“Literally shut up, Mina you’re better than me,” you mumble, rolling your eyes at your enthusiastic best friend. “I most definitely am not! Besides, this is a great fuck you to your ex. You know the one who told you that you would never be able to become a singer and shit on you every opportunity he got.”

“Yeah. Thank you for bringing him up.”

“Yes! Thank you for bringing him up! Could you talk about him a little more? If that’s okay?”

You stare at the producer and sigh. “Yeah. Sure, whatever. I had a boyfriend a while back who didn’t support me in my artsy ways. Since he was older, he would always make sure I knew that he thought it was a childish hobby, and that I should grow up and do something that I would actually be able to survive on. He kind of ruined my love for music, but after he broke up with me, I got it back since it was how I coped with it.”

“So, you’re here to get back at him? Show him what you’re made of?”

“Well, no... but that would be pretty dope, not gonna lie, he can go fuck himself,” you say, with a small smirk on your face. After a few more questions about your ex-boyfriend and yours and Mina’s crippling student debt, the producers wander off to someone else. “They are totally using your story for television,” Mina says, and you scoff. “They only use stories for people who they want the audience to vote for, I know how these shows work,” you say, glancing around and having your eyes land on the next poor soul the producers trapped. Looked like it was a very sleepy purple haired e-boy. Damn. He’d for sure make it through if this competition was based off of looks alone. How the hell were you supposed to compete with people who looked like that. “I don’t think I should be here, Mina,” you mumble, tearing your eyes away from him. Unbeknownst to you your gaze was replaced by his as his quick little interview ended. “What? (Y/n), stop with that! What were you just looking at that made you even think that?” Mina asks, frantically searching around. “Well the producers were-”

“Oh my god! Denki?! (Y/n), that’s one of the guys I was really good friends with when we were in high school, come on you have to meet him,” Mina cuts you off, literally dragging you over. “Mina?! Why didn’t you tell me you were gonna be here?! We have phones you know,” You watch the blonde with a black streak in his hair tackle your best friend in a hug with an unamused expression. You didn’t want to meet anyone. You were tired. The anxiety of this situation kept you up all night long. Then again, staying up all night was normal for you. At least you looked bomb though. You felt the burning sensation of someone staring at you, so naturally you turn your head in that direction. Your eyes were met with the back of the purple haired boys messy head, but no one was looking though, so you shrug it off. Probably someone just scoping out the competition or something. “Denki, this is-”

“Contestants number 14788 and 14789? Follow me please,” a producer cuts off Mina and you feel a wave of anxiety wash over you. You grip the neck of your guitar tighter than you had been gripping it before. It’s not performing that makes you nervous, it’s performing in front of the panel of world-renowned judges that makes you nervous. And try as you might you can’t hide it. “Oh, shit, sorry Denki, I’ll talk to you after, okay? See ya!”

“Break a leg, Mina,” Denki says as Mina links arms with you and pulls you along with her happy steps. “I’ll introduce him to you after we both make it, I wanna know more about his friend anyways, so he better not leave until I interrogate him,” she starts rambling and you laugh a bit. “Awww, does Mina have a crush on the purple haired boy? Pink and purple go well together, you know.”

“No, she doesn’t. She thinks that you would look great with him though.”

“No. Not happening.”

“Come on, (Y/n), you gotta put yourself out there! It’s been two whole years since he who shall not be named broke up with you, you can-”

“Mina. Drop it. Please.”

“…Okay. So, I’m going first. hopefully I come out with a golden ticket, but if I don’t don’t let that psych you out, okay? You got this you crazy talented bitch,” Mina says, trying to lighten the mood. She knows you don’t want to be in a relationship ever again after what happened with your ex, but she can’t help it. She loves playing matchmaker and she just wants you to be happy. Recently you’ve been a little sadder the usual, so she’s concerned. It was like she turned back time to when you two first moved into your apartment and you were dealing with school and your douche of an ex. She knows you find Denki’s friend attractive, he’s 100% your type and you two would look amazing as a couple. Not to mention that his friend just so happened to be staring at you at any moment you weren’t looking in his general direction. Not able to read her mind going 100 miles a minute, you just nod at her words as you come face to face with the most famous emcee there is. Hizashi Yamada. Better known as his stage name, Present Mic, PM for short. “HELLO!!! You two look amazing! You ready to become the next UA Idol or what?!” he says, way too enthusiastically. You always wondered just how loud he was in real life, and he rivals Mina. That’s saying something. “I’m totally ready!” she responds, and you laugh at PM’s face when he realizes she’s just as loud, if not louder, than him. “So, you’re both auditioning, right? Are you going together? Separate?”

“Separate, we’re just here to wait outside for moral support,” Mina responds, and he nods. “Awesome! Well, tell me your names! If you two get through to Hell Week there’s a good chance you’ll be televised, so I would like to just talk for a minute!” he says, and you both introduce yourselves again. “Amazing! I’m assuming you two are great friends, I mean you must be pretty important to each other to have it just be you two with no partners or family or anything coming. Reminds me of me and Aizawa!”

“Yeah, but we’re just best friends actually! And roommates, we moved here away from our families and we’re both single, so all we have is each other,” Mina says, pulling you into a quick little squeeze. Present Mic screams something about how adorable that was before wishing Mina luck and sending her in. Shockingly, you’re both quiet as you hear her audition begin, and unsurprisingly, she flawlessly hits all the notes in Lady Marmalade. Her voice isn’t only loud when she talks, after all. PM’s eyes go big as he points at the door, looking at you and mouthing “She’s really good!” You just grin and nod. This isn’t news to you. After hearing her blast Whitney Houston and Mariah Carey all the time and belting out their runs and matching their high notes for about three years, it’s not shocking to you how great she can sing this song. Eventually, her singing stops, and PM waits a minute or two before he begins talking again, not necessarily quiet, but quieter than before. “I did not expect that kind of soul to come out of that little body of hers!”

“Yeah, she can be unpredictable like that... now imagine living with her,” you mumble, half kidding and half serious, but he laughs at that. Loudly. Not even a moment later, Mina walks through the doors and violently shakes the ticket in her hand at you. “I DID IT! I DID IT, KICK ASS, TAKE NAMES, AND MAKE SURE YOU COME TO HELL WEEK WITH ME SO YOU’RE NOT ALONE AT THE APARTMENT FOR A WHOLE WEEK!”

“I won’t be alone; Nyx will be there she is great company.”

“(Y/n), she is a black cat.”

“She is our third roommate and you will treat her as such,” you point your finger at her before PM gives you the clear to go in the room. “Make sure to hit your mark! That’s the tape shaped like a T on the floor! Break a leg,” he says, giving you two thumbs up. You nervously make your way through the short hallway, eventually landing right smack in the middle of the room. You make sure to hit the mark, as PM instructed, and you need to tell yourself to calm down as you look at four of the most influential people in music. In front of you sat Shouta Aizawa, Keigo Takami, Nemuri Kayama, and Toshinori Yagi.

Better known as just Aizawa, a well-known singer-songwriter. He stays behind the scenes mostly, and the rumor is he’s written over 20,000 songs for himself as well as other artists. The majority of course go to other artists, as he isn’t a big fan of all the fame and things, but the few albums he’s put out have some of your favorite songs ever written. He’s genuinely someone you’ve been looking up to for years upon years.

Then there’s Keigo Takami, who is known as Hawks. He chose his stage name because he’s always admired the strength and freedom of hawks and he decided that he wanted to be the same way. And he is, he literally can do everything. Every song of his sounds different, varying from rock to country. A lot of people really support his country music considering he calls his fans his chickadees. People just think it fits. The genre he seems to gravitate toward the most is definitely more of a rock vibe, even having his own band. And yes, the band’s emblem is a pair of red wings.

Next to him is Nemuri Kayama, or Midnight. She’s a world-famous popstar, but she makes sure to include some soul sounding belts in every single one of her songs. She’s Mina’s literal idol, and the amount of times you’ve had to listen to Midnight’s songs? So many. So many times. Not that you were complaining, her voice is amazing. You just wished she didn’t sing about love and sex all the fucking time.

And finally, there’s Toshinori Yagi. People tend to shorten his name to Nori, but he’s the most famous judge here. Not only does he own the All Might Record Label, he has won 11 Grammys, his music is played everywhere all the time, and he manages some of the biggest stars today. Unlike his rival record company, Endeavor Records, it’s said that Toshinori is ridiculously nice as well as a little strange, but in comparison to Enji Todoroki? The nicest man to walk the planet. 100%. Not to mention he’s also a singer himself. His songs are instant smashes, and everyone loves his voice. Even if he isn’t mean, he’s so ridiculously powerful in the business.

To say you were intimidated was an understatement.

#shinsou x reader #hitoshi shinsou x reader #shinso x reader #hitoshi shinso x reaedr #my hero academia x reader #bnha x reader #boku no hero x reader #shinsou #hitoshi shinsou #shinso #hitoshi shinso #my hero academia #bnha #boku no hero academia #anime

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capricornus-rex · 4 years

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Playing Pretend (7)

Requested by: @calkesttiss | Prompt:

Hi! I just watched isi & ossi (rich girl and poor boxer boy AH) on netflix and now i cant stop thinking about cal and fake dating. Do with that what you will

Hey guys! I hope you’re enjoying the fic as it goes along :) I think I got too carried away in making the story outline because this was such an interesting reference (Isi & Ossi), so I guess I had fun writing it that’s why I ended up making so many parts. I hope you don’t mind that! Again, I hope you enjoy the story and it would be great if you support me in my future content (fics), it means a great deal to me 💓

Cal Kestis x Reader

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | Next: Part 8 | Masterlist

7 of ?

When you got home, you were greeted by your parents with faces blanker than a canvas. They were now fully aware that you are definitely spending time with this boy. Your mother is usually the one who had the most to say, whereas your father had nothing much to say—in fact, your parents were perfect opposites of one another.

“Oh, so now you suddenly care that I come home late, that I’m gone for hours because I’m spending most of it with my boyfriend, and that I actually exist?”

“What’s it going to take for you to stop this behavior?”

“Postpone the engagement with Logan that you made without my consent and 40,000 credits,”

“What in the world are you going to do with forty-thousand, [y/n]?!”

“What? A girl’s gotta shop,” you say condescendingly. “Plus, when did five digits ever worry you, Mom? You’re one of the filthy rich, remember? Forty-thousand is barely a dent on your joint account!”

“[y/n], please can we sort this out?” your poor father sighed.

As much as you want to give in for your father, if you give in now then you have broken your deal with Cal by default—you couldn’t allow it, your parents even seem to have overlooked your demand of postponing the engagement.

When your parents were sure that you were out of earshot, Sorhan reassured his wife that he will send out of the bodyguards to keep an eye on her—even though he was against the whole idea. Little did they know that you were hiding behind the walls near the living room, though it didn’t surprise you that they will be sending out spies for you—you knew exactly how to evade them. Even if they did see you, there’s nothing much they can do.

You repeated the exact same words of your non-negotiables to your parents, your words were almost immediately eaten by the air as soon as you released them. You shake your head in utter disappointment and retreated to your bedroom. By rote, you check your holotable for transmissions and messages that you received while you were out—majority of them came from Tazha begging you to call her back once you’re back, which you did.

“Ugh, finally!”

“Really? That’s how you’re gonna start the call, Taz?”

“You’ve been gone all day!”

“Yeah, I was with Cal the whole time,”

“You mean your fake boyfriend?”

You paused from removing your jacket just so you could shoot back a look at Tazha. You picked up something from the way she put that out, though you shouldn’t have a reason to get that word under your skin. You forget that it was the reality of this whole ordeal.

“Got something to tell me, Tazha?”

“Well, duh, tell me how your date go?”

“It wasn’t a date, we just met up and talked,”

Tazha rolled her eyes and sighed, “Gee, how romantic.”

While folding your jacket, a smile had curled up in your lips when the memory of you and Cal back at the abandoned park suddenly flashed in your mind. Not even the slightest smile escape Tazha’s eagle eyes—even through a holotable transmission.

“Hup! I saw that, [y/n],” she perked up, pointing her finger at you. “Come on, you’ve got something to tell!”

“Does it really interest you or nah?”

Tazha debated that she definitely wants to hear about your day and so you narrated everything to her from the very beginning until the end when you two were in the park all day. It wasn’t the moments you retold that interested her, it was more of the way you told it—even your face was telling a lot more of the story than your lips.

“He listens to The HU too!”

“So what are you guys gonna do tomorrow or next?”

You shrug your shoulders but you didn’t worry about it too much.

Wow, this is so unlike her. Tazha thought to herself when she saw you squeal like a toddler, she’s never seen you this excited for anything. Being your best friend since forever, she knows that you were the planner between the two of you—and to see you not panicking over the fact that you’ve got no specific plans for the next time you and Cal meet up kind of surprised her.

The dates continued on. You brought Cal to the farmer’s market where they sell delicacies and drinks found only in Alderaan, one of your favorites being the Starblossom fruit and the beverage Mocoa.

“Be sure to remove the seeds, they’re really bitter when you bite them,”

“I’ve never had these ever, these are really good!”

“Yeah?”

“I think this is gonna top Jogan berries in my list of favorite fruits,”

There are still so many things you want Cal to see and try. The pubs and its drinks, the farmer’s market and what it has to offer, and even the mosh pits. He was surprised that even in a classy planet as Alderaan, there are such things.

“Well, the rich people aren’t the only ones who wanna have fun!” you exclaim.

You still couldn’t wrap your head around the fact that you and Cal are getting along well despite this fake relationship—sometimes he forgets that he was even in one in the first place. He continued to spend time with you, meeting up with you whenever you asked. In the first few days, he did it out of obligation and for the sake of following the agreement; but the more often you two hang out, he slowly warmed up to you some more. He allowed you to drag him around the city and bring him to places that you usually frequent.

Each time you’re with him, the more you wanted the moments to last longer. You didn’t want to come back to your house.

You and Cal get into a mosh pit, the show was about to start, and the crowd was beginning to go wild. Most of the partygoers were young people—just about your age—and they were clad in a complete contrast to the luxurious clothes that the elites wear.

Cal wrapped his arm around your shoulder which startled you, when you tilted your head up to look at him, he had that casual look in his face.

“What are you doing?”

“Figured we ought to look the part,” he smirked.

You scoffed as you smiled back, seeing that there was no harm in it, the two of you approach the bouncer at the gate.

“Hey-hey, look who it is! It’s [y/n]! Where the heck have you been?!”

“Hey Fritz, heard that the band’s here!”

“For sure!” the bouncer takes notice of Cal, he points at him but kept his eyes on you. “Your boy?”

“Yeah, this is Cal.”

“Hoo-whee, and I thought the princess could never score a keeper!”

You brush off the bouncer’s teasing and he finally lets you and Cal in after you hand him a handful of credits. From afar, you found the bodyguard that your father had sent blend in with the crowd but he sticks out like a sore thumb, you ignored him and let him see you enter the mosh pit; he later contacts your father shortly after you and Cal entered.

“You’re a regular here?” Cal closed in on your ear as the bass was blaring through the speakers.

“Yeah well, I come around here more often than the Tipsy Taun-taun! I’m sure you’ll like it here, just wait and see!” you confidently assured him.

Cal stayed close to you while the two of you stayed at the bar, watching the crowd and whoever performer is on stage, and sipping Alderaanian brandy. After the performer that was already on stage when you got there, the emcee walks in and says his spiel for the next one. He vaguely introduces the band until he declares the name.

“The one you’ve all been waiting for: The HU!!!”

The crowd went wild, they roared and whistled, some of them even spun their bandannas in the air as the band members enter. As for Cal, his lips parted open starting from the moment the emcee uttered the band’s name. He looked to you, as if looking for some confirmation, and you answered his expression with a smile combined with a single twitch of your eyebrows.

The song started with a few strokes of their fiddles and then the beat of the drums. The crowd was bobbing and rocking to the rhythm of all the instruments and the unconventional yet impressive vocals—to you, the scene almost looked like a cult meeting.

“You knew they’d be here, didn’t you?”

You beamed a playful smile, “Told ya you’d like it!”

The HU was reaching its chorus, the instrumental was gradually heightening its intensity, and the crowd chanted along to the lyrics—even covering the background voices in certain verses. Eventually, you and Cal joined along as you knew the song as well as everyone else watching the gig. The songs became wilder. Laughter drowned in the roars of the crowd and the acoustics of the instruments, but neither of you didn’t care, the two of you are simply having fun in the heat of the moment.

The next band comes in. It was a drastic shift of mood compared to the last band as the vocalist belted out mellow tones, but the crowd—including the pair of you—adapted quickly; from bobbing your heads to the impactful beating of the drum, you sway left to right with your hands raised up harmonizing with the smooth strumming of the guitar and the neon lights have softened into warmer tones of purple, blue, and orange.

Cal wrapped his arm around you while swaying with the crowd. Much later, he gently cups your chin and angles your head so you face him. Was it on a whim or by impulse? Is there a difference anyway? It didn’t matter to him. Without warning, he brings himself closer to you until the gap in between is gone.

In the middle of the crowd.

Cal’s lips presses against yours.

Everything suddenly seemed to slow down—the movements of the crowd and the band, the beams of light dancing around the place, and the pace of time.

He presses his lips to yours, now your heart is beating ever faster, he softly suckles your lower lip and he slowly pulls away. The two of you exchanged tender gazes at each other, in the next second you gently pull him close by the straps of his armor and return the kiss.

Your trembling hands perched on his broad shoulders. The intensity was flaring, he allowed himself to get carried away. Everything around you felt like it was spinning. You were caught in the moment.

You didn’t even realize that your father and the bodyguard had tracked you down to the mosh pit, but when Sorhan saw you, he almost thought that the girl he was seeing wasn’t his own daughter: lips stretched to an ear-to-ear smile, eyes squinted into tight slits, and a laughter drowned by the blaring sounds of the music and the roaring crowd.

“Sir?”

“Come on. Leave her,” your father resigned and marched out of the bar, the confused bodyguard followed suit.

When the hype in the mosh pit died down, Cal offered to take you home. You walked the streets hand-in-hand, the rush is still fresh in both of you, and he would steal glimpses of you smiling to yourself—in turn, he would smile too as the two of you walk.

His pace got noticeably slower when you arrive to the manor’s porch, you were reluctant yourself, you didn’t want to get near the front door either. Cal squeezes your hand and step forward to the first step of the porch, he remained standing on one step below. You turn to Cal and the bright glint in his eyes that you saw at the mosh pit had dimmed down.

“Hey,” you cooed, giving his hand clutching yours a gentle shake. “I had the most fun tonight.”

“Me too.”

He manages a smile. Cal slowly closes in on you, your head tilts up as your eyes follow him; he softly brushes the wisps of hair to the back of your ear. He was hesitant about something. Your heart was racing again, he gazes at you intently and tenderly. His eyes trail to your mouth, he gently cups your chin with one hand and inches you closer to him.

His lips met your lips again, but this time, his kiss was much tenderer. You suckle his lips back as your felt his hands crawl and caress your neck. He finally wills himself to pull away from you.

“Good night,” he whispers while the tips of your noses brush against each other.

You smile, “Good night.”

His grip on your hand slowly loosens until the last of yours fingers have slid away from his grasp. Your free hand blindly pawed the door and turned the knob. You push the door open while still looking back at Cal; you step in and the last thing you see as you slowly close it is him smiling back at you—but it was a sad smile, you somehow understand why because the feeling’s mutual.

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sprnklersplashes · 4 years

Text

heart of stone (7/?)

AO3

Unlike most of his peers, Damian isn’t excited at all about moving out. There’s a lot he loves about living at home-having a mom who cooks him his own meals, not having to pay bills, living withing walking distance of his best friends and a not having to do his own laundry. All those little conveniences are things he’ll miss sorely when that day comes, but the biggest reason has nothing to do with any of that. No, the reason he dreads moving out is because he’s not sure if he’ll be able to find a roommate that will put up with his constant singing around the house. Especially around audition time.

Which is why now, he’s practicing his rendition of Dressing Them Up in his bedroom, his mom being incredibly cool about the whole thing downstairs and Janis on Facetime, earbuds in and bopping along with him and giving him more enthusiasm than the actual audience probably will.

“You sound great.” She’s sitting cross legged on her hospital bed in a sweater and leggings, her face more bare than it was yesterday, but her eyes still bright and laugh lines creased around her eyes and mouth. She’s still her.

It was tough, seeing her for the first time, but weirdly, it wasn’t nearly as tough as he thought it would be. Once he got past the strangeness of the hospital environment and the little emotional hiccup she had with Cady, he knew she’s still her. Hard situation, uncomfortable new world, but still his Janis.

“You think so?” he says. “I don’t know about this song. All the forums say it’s a really good song to audition for the Emcee with.”

“And it’s your party piece,” she tells him. “Remember freshman year, you sang it for my grandpa?”

“I miss your grandpa,” he sighs.

“I’ll let him know. He calls me weekly now.” She shifts on the bed, tossing her hair over her shoulder. Before he even realises what she’s doing, he checks her arm. No IV in there. Why does that make him feel better? “So do you think you’re going to change it?”

“Should I?” he asks, looking through his music. “The audition’s tomorrow. I don’t know if I can research and learn a new song by tomorrow.”

“Then don’t,” she tells him. “You’re overthinking it.”

“You’re telling me off for overthinking,” he says rather indignantly, raising an eyebrow at her. “This is the same girl who texted me at 2 in the morning for my opinion on a dog meme to send to Cady.”

“I needed a second opinion,” she says.

“Thought you didn’t need opinions,” he teases.

“Maybe I need yours,” she says softly, the grin on her face lighting up the screen. “Dick.”

“Don’t even love you,” he replies, blowing a kiss softly to the screen. Janis giggles, hiding her face behind her hand.

“Okay, you have the scene worked out as well?”

“I think so.” He picks up the extract from his bed. He’s done it for everyone, Janis, his mom, Janis’ mom, Cady, even the plastics. He learned that day that Gretchen is amazing at giving weirdly specific compliments and also knows more about theatre than he’d have guessed. Maybe in another life she’d be a drama geek like him. “It’s just an audition anyway. They’re not looking for the finished product. Just potential.”

“And you my good man are 6’2” of raw mother fucking potential.”

“Janis, language!”

“Raw mother freaking potential. Sorry, mom.” Somewhere behind the phone, Janis’ mom says something and Janis chuckles, rolling her eyes. “I’m not allowed to cuss in here. Since this is a ‘children’s ward’.” She quotes the word with her fingers. “Which is apparently where I belong.”

“You are a children,” he reminds her.

“I am older than you!” she spits back, laughter shaking her voice. She leans back on the bed, tossing her hair over her shoulder. The joke slips from her face, leaving soft sincerity in its place. “Are you nervous?”

“I don’t get nervous.” She raises her eyebrow at him, of course. By now she can see into his brain like there’s a little window on his forehead. It’s why he can’t bullshit with her, and conversely, why she can’t with him. “A little. I just really want a good role, you know. It’s our last show.”

“Which is why you’re going to ace that audition so hard,” she tells him. “Just don’t drink dairy in the morning and do your breathing before you go in. And stay away from the candy!”

“Pity you’re not here to remind me,” he says.

“True, but I did take the liberty of passing on all the info to Cady,” she tells him. “She knows what to do.”

“You’re a hero, babe.”

“Don’t I just know it,” she says. “Are you going to do the whole ‘dress for the part you want’?”

“Of course.” He runs over to his wardrobe and shows her the outfit he’d picked out for tomorrow, black silk waistcoat and black skinny jeans, his dance shoes in his bag. “What do we think?”

“Oh, that’s so sexy,” she tells him. “We need to bring waistcoats back to the collective again. I miss them.” Before he can answer, she looks beyond the camera, nodding along to a conversation he can’t hear. She casts an anxious glance at him, so quickly that he would have missed it if he blinked. “Okay. Okay, yeah fine, I know. Okay fine.” She turns back to him, letting out a long exhale that makes the hair on his arms stand up. He can’t help it; he has built-in parental instincts and they’ve been heightened ever since Janis went to hospital. So much so that even when she flashes up a peace sign and grins, it’s hard for him to grin back. “I have to bounce. Go get a good night’s sleep, ace it tomorrow, and tell the drama club that my services are still available.”

“I’ll let them know,” he says. He sits on the bed, tucking one leg under his body. He’s reluctant to let her go, their time together so precious now. “I love you, honey pot.”

“Love you more, bitch.” Her face freezes and then she’s gone. Not gone, he corrects himself. Just… not around for him right now.

“Okay,” he exhales, giving himself a shake. She’s fine. She said she was fine, she looked fine, she is fine. And she will be fine. She even said that she might be well enough to come see him in the show, all things going smoothly. The thought alone is enough to make him smile. Of course she will. The show won’t be for months anyway. He just has to get through this first. So he picks up his music and bounces down the stairs, ready to treat his mom and sisters to yet another rendition.

*****

It’s just after second period when the nerves do start to kick in. He’s not scared or intimidated, he can’t be he approaches auditions the way Cady would a calculus test, as a thrilling challenge to be overcome and a way to improve, whatever the outcome. But like he said to Janis, it’s his last year. He’s not gotten parts before but would be different. He wouldn’t throw a fit or leave the show if he didn’t get it, those types of divas make him cringe so much it hurts. But he can’t shake the idea that it wouldn’t be as special if he were in the ensemble in his last year. Besides, this is his part. Always has been.

“Hey.” He jumps off the floor, so wrapped up in his own thoughts he’d barely noticed the person sliding up beside him. He’s even more surprised when he sees who it is; Regina, wearing a lacrosse jersey over her white dress and a smile that’s uncharacteristically apprehensive. Since when did Regina George doubts? More to the point, since when did Regina talk to him? He wouldn’t be surprised if she didn’t even know his name until Cady told him. He just assumed he was ‘Janis’ gay friend’ to her, nothing more. The same way she’s nothing more than ‘asshole Queen Bee I’d punch given the chance’ to him.

“Hi,” he says flatly. Her smile falters at his tone, and he has to hide his own smirk behind his locker door. Someone clearly isn’t used to not being given the golden treatment.

“So… how’s Janis doing?”

And the surprises keep on coming.

“You care?” he snorts.

“Yeah, I do.” Her tone is more defensive this time, the familiar anger that’s become her trademark making an appearance. Somehow, she sounds more natural this way. She shakes her head and tosses her dark hair over her shoulder. “You’ve talked to her recently, I’m guessing.”

“Of course I have. She’s my best friend,” he fires back, suddenly finding himself on the defence. Heat prickles on his skin and he wants nothing more than to get out of this conversation.

“I just�� wanted to know how she’s doing,” she says, her voice quiet and her arms crossed over her chest. He closes the locker door and looks at her, trying to find some semblance of the ruthless predator he knows rather than the timid, vulnerable creature before him. It’s unsettling, seeing her like this, and he’s almost certain it’s a trap. “So how is she?”

“She’s great.” He slams the locker door closed and now it’s her turn to jump. “Janis is doing great. And she’s being let out for a week on Friday. So, she’s great.”

“O-okay,” she replies. She picks at her nails, her eyes growing wide. It’s only when she takes a step back that he can breathe again. She gives an attempted smile and it doesn’t look right on her face. “That’s cool. That’s good to hear.”

“Yeah.” He puts his bag on his shoulder and pushes past her. Admittedly, he does feel a little guilty here. Regina’s a horrible person, but she’s still a person, right? Maybe she is worried about Janis, that there’s some sincerity beneath the make-up.

No. Of course not. And if Regina wanted his respect, she should have started back in middle school. And in any case, why is he even thinking about Regina? He’s got way bigger things to worry about today than her.

He checks his phone at lunch, finding nothing from Janis. Which is normal these days. Normal re-adjusted pretty quickly and she’s just finished another round right about now, so she’s probably resting from that. Besides, no news is good news, as his mom likes to say.

“Damian. Damian!”

“Woah, yeah, I’m here.” He shakes his head, grabbing the side of the table. He really needs to tune back in today. Cady is sitting beside him, her hand on his shoulder and her eyes big with concern.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I am,” he says, patting her hand. “Just daydreaming, kid.”

“Okay.” Silence settles over them, tight and uncomfortable. It hurts. Janis’ absence hasn’t rocked their friendship at all, but at the same time it’s felt like there’s been something missing since the start of the year. And that there’s constantly something going unsaid with them. “When’s your audition?”

“T minus four hours,” he tells her. “They’re after school.”

“Speaking of I see you’ve broken out the two-litre bottle of water.”

“Are you kidding me?” he asks. “Honey, I am a professional.”

“A professional drama queen,” she teases. “You think you’re ready?”

“As I can be. My mom and sisters all gave me a standing ovation,” he says proudly. “And I think my cat liked it.”

“I mean that’s all the validation you need,” she says. “When you go into your first Broadway audition, all you need to tell them is how highly your cat recommends you.” They burst into laughter as Karen and a forlorn-looking Gretchen sit down next to them, Karen holding the other girl’s hand and looking helplessly at Cady and Damian.

“Hey, what’s up, Gretch?” Cady asks. Without a word, Gretchen slides a crumpled sheet of math questions over the table and lets out a huff. Despite trying not to look, Damian can’t help noticing the score at the top, and the “see me” written at the bottom. Cady’s face falls instantly as she takes in a sharp breath. “Well, it’s just the second week. And it’s one homework.”

“Oh, what’s the use,” Gretchen sighs. “I’m never going to get it. It’s all so complicated. I wish I had a brain like yours, Cady. You’re super great at math.”

“Well you’re good at stuff too,” Cady responds.

“Yeah,” Karen agrees. “Like you’re super good at English. And at picking out clothes.”

“I don’t think Ms Gardner will appreciate me picking out clothes,” she says glumly. “Besides, I need to get better at math this year. For one thing, my dad will totally kill me if I get another C.”

“Well… hey why don’t I tutor you?” Cady offers, changing Gretchen’s entire demeanour in an instant. She sits up and gasps, a smile breaking out across her face and lighting up the cafeteria.

“You would? Really?” she squeaks.

“Of course! I mean, I did all this stuff last year, so I know it well. What do you say?”

“Oh, thank you so much!” She reaches out the table and grabs Cady’s hand, and judging by Cady’s face, it’s stronger than you might think for Gretchen’s slight frame. “This makes me feel so much better.”

“What does?” Regina sits down beside her, looking from Cady to Gretchen and funnily enough, avoiding Damian entirely.

“Oh, Cady’s going to tutor me in math,” Gretchen explains.

“Oh, cool,” Regina says. “You know that’ll look great on a college application.”

“Yeah. I mean of course that’s not the only reason I’m doing it,” Cady replies, smiling at Gretchen. “But I know. All I’ve heard since we got back is ‘college applications’.”

“Me too,” Damian sighs. “And I am not looking forward to telling Miss Meyer I want to do theatre.” He rolls his eyes and mimics shooting his head.

“Oh, hey Damian, Cady?” Karen asks. “Can I ask you something.”

“Um… sure?”

“What kind of muffins does Janis like?” The four of them all fall quiet, Damian looking to a confused Cady before back at Karen, who seems to be the only one who sees the sense here.

“Muffins?” he echoes.

“Mm-hm. Well, I want to bake her muffins to cheer her up, and since you two are her besties, I thought you’d know,” she explains. “Trust me, there’s nothing worse than bringing someone the wrong muffins. One time my cousin brought my other cousin muffins that weren’t her favourite and I was so, so ashamed for her.”

“Oh, okay,” he says. Karen nods severely, apparently taking the muffins incredibly seriously. “Um… she really likes raspberries I guess. Oh, and white chocolate. That’s one of her favourite combos.”

“Perfect!” she chirps. “I’ll start shopping for those tomorrow. I told my mom about her and she said she might like something sweet.”

“That’s… really nice,” he says. Life with the former-Plastics is a surprise even after spending the summer with them. He isn’t sure how ‘former’ he’d consider them, especially Regina, but they’re softer than they were a year ago. Gretchen more caring, Karen more kind. Or maybe they were always like that and he simply didn’t notice.

As they get up to leave, he takes out his phone and checks it. Still nothing from her.

He walks Cady to her next class, the two of them being on the same floor.

“Should I wait for you until your audition’s done?” she asks him.

“Oh, you don’t have to do that,” he says, patting her on the back. “Go live your life, little one.”

“Okay, but…” She rests her head on his shoulder and warmth sparks in his fingers and a stupid grin crosses his face. “Would you like me to wait until after your audition? We can go to the donut place after?”

“Did Janis tell you to do that?” Grabbing donuts after auditions to unwind has been their tradition since middle school.

“Well, yeah,” she says, shrugging innocently. “Just thought it would be cool. It’s what you always do, right?”

“Yeah. Yeah of course, totally. That’d be awesome.” They stop outside her history classroom. “Okay, I will see you later.”

“I’ll be in the library,” she explains. “You can meet me there?”

“Awesome blossom.” They have a quick high-five before he sets off down the hall to American Literature. As he goes, he finds a small but fierce sense of anxiety sparking in his chest and he can’t work out what it’s for. Probably the audition. After all, no amount of experience can chase away the terror of this process. Waiting around, learning and re-learning lines, sitting by his computer waiting for an email and fighting through crowds to see the cast list. He puts up a confident face, but that will never stop shaking him.

He takes out his phone again, just to check the time and location again. There’s nothing from Janis again, which is fine. Completely.

“Damian Hubbard.” He halts and looks up at the face of his Literature teacher, Mr Bock. He’s not great, but he’s not awful either. Once upon a time he may have actually liked kids. “Is that phone meant to be out during school hours?”

“No, sir,” he replies, sliding it back into his pocket and hoping for the best.

“Well come on, you’re in my class next and I won’t have anyone being tardy.”

“No, sir,” he repeats, doubling his pace and making it into the classroom, looking up at the clock as he does so. Just three more hours to go.

*****

He spends the time waiting for his slot breathing and doing small vocal warm-ups, enough to get him ready but not enough to irritate anyone else. As well as consoling a fearful looking little freshman kid. There are few things in the world that warm his heart quite as much as seeing new faces in auditions and watching them bloom during the show. He always makes sure to build connections with each and every one of them, taking up the role he wished someone had done for him. By the time Damian’s name is called, the freshman is grinning and his hands are nearly steady and he even whispers ‘good luck’ before he goes in.

“Afternoon all,” he greets the panel; Miss Petersen, the director/oldest drama teacher, and the perky little new one, fresh out of teaching college and rearing to go, as well as the choreographer and head of the drama club. Three familiar faces and one new, all smiling back at him. Something he tells every freshman; they want to cast you. He hands the sheet music to the girl at the piano and takes his spot, always remembering to smile and compliment her.

“Hi Damian, how are you?” Petersen asks.

“I’m great,” he replies. He clears his throat slightly, not having realised how tight it was. Did he not warm up enough? “Ready to go.”

“Okay so what song have you picked for us today?” the new teacher asks. Miss Hadsell, someone said her name is. She’s cute, with wide dark eyes and blonde hair in a messy braid. He wonders if she also takes art, he hasn’t seen her around the art room.

Then he remembers he hasn’t been in the art room this year.

“I have picked Dressing Them Up from Kiss of the Spider Woman,” he says brightly, bringing himself back. Here and now, that’s what matters.

“Good choice,” Miss Petersen says. “And you’ll be reading for the part of the Emcee?”

“Yes ma’am.”

“Okay.” She grins at him, although it doesn’t really do anything to bring his focus back. What is wrong with him today?

He takes two deep breaths, and then another, and quickly shakes out his hands before nodding to the pianist. Once the song starts, he’ll be fine. Lost in the music, laser focussed. And he is. After missing the first note. He’s never missed a note before. Still, he manages to pick up the rest of it and keep going, throwing everything into it.

But it doesn’t feel enough. Like something is holding him back. Every time he’s sang this song before it’s come as naturally as breathing, the movements coming from him, not a character or persona. Now nothing feels right. Like he’s on a string and someone else is moving his limbs and every gesture is artificial.

By the time he finishes, it’s almost a relief. And he’s never thought that about performing.

“That was great!” Miss Hadsell says. “You must love that song a lot.”

“It’s an old favourite of mine,” he agrees. He can still bring this back. Maybe it was better than he thought.

He reads through two scenes for them before he’s asked to leave. At least those are stronger, partially because he knows them like the back of his hand. He feels more himself in them, or rather he feels more like the character. Even if his mind’s still a little fuzzy, it clicks for him. If only it could have happened earlier.

Rather than running right to the library and Cady afterwards, he sinks down onto a bench in an empty corridor, wringing his hands together. He doesn’t remember ever feeling that nervous or having an audition like that. Not even when he was a kid. Being in drama clubs since he could walk chased away the strong jitters that could affect him like that. So what happened in there?”

You know a voice in his head whispers. He goes to wave it off, but he can’t quite do it. Because what if there’s some truth in it. He’s worried about Janis, he’s only human. But he has it under control. She’s getting what she needs and she’ll be back with him by Christmas, and they’ll move forward like nothing ever happened. He presses his fist into his palm and bites his cheek. He’s handling it, and his own issues have never affected his performances before. Why would they now?

There’s no point in worrying now, he tells himself. It’s over, so just go home, tell everyone it was fine and whatever happens, happens.

It’s with that mantra that he gets up and heads to the library to pick up Cady.

*****

The next day is Wednesday and when he wakes up he’s suddenly immensely excited and won’t pretend he doesn’t know why. As his mom likes to say, ‘Wednesday is halfway to the weekend’. Which is enough of a reason to be happy in itself, but this means something more. It means it’s two days until Janis gets out of hospital and three days until they hang out again. They arranged it a few days ago; a movie night in her place, just like always, with blankets and pillows and junk food and an equal balance of musicals and old sci-fi and horror. So he can’t not be excited, so much so that it’s enough for him to block out the memories of his audition yesterday.

So when he half-walks, half-dances into the kitchen, it’s justified, and what’s more, his mom picks up on it.

“Someone’s in a good mood,�� she remarks.

“Sun’s shining, birds chirping,” he replies as he puts on the coffee pot and pops bread into the toaster.

“Did you talk to Janis at all last night?”

“A bit.” He pours himself a cup and one for his mom. All the milk in his and one sugar for him, black and two sugars for his mom.

“How’s she doing?”

“She’s fine,” he says. “You know her. Tough as hell, fighting anything.” His phone vibrates in his pocket and it brings an instant smile to his face. “As a matter of fact that’s her now… oh…”

Janis’ message is a picture of the medical student, Jackson, fiddling with her IV, shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Below is the caption ‘forgot to send you this yesterday. Thought you might enjoy’. And a winking face, of all the emojis.

‘Appreciated, thank you,’ he texts back. ‘Though I am debating the ethical ramifications of this.’

He probably won’t get an answer for a while. She tends to sleep in in the mornings.

“Her poor mother,” his mom sighs, seemingly to herself. He looks up at her, her hands tight around the hug and her head shaking. “I mean, poor Janis as well of course. No one deserves to go through that. But if anything like that were to happen to you…” She runs a hand through his hair, a fond smile along with her sad features. “God knows what I’d do.” There’s a small moment, a sigh, and then she kisses his head.

“Mom, you’re so mushy,” he sighs, not meaning any of it. Mushy is a well-established Hubbard trait passed from mother to son and he’s not ashamed of it, not at all. It’s that exact mushy-ness that gives him the capacity to love his friends the way he does and let them feel it every chance he can. He’d never trade it for anything. “I have to get ready. Don’t want to be late. Love you!”

When he gets into homeroom, Cady is bent over her notebook with her pens out, which strikes him as odd. Surely the study bee Cady Heron isn’t catching up on homework already. He’s not even catching up on homework yet.

“Hey.” He pulls on her ponytail, a far more amusing way of getting her attention that tapping her shoulder. She grins and looks up at him, stretching out her arms. “What are you working on?”

“Trying to make a schedule for tutoring,” she explains, handing it over to him. The page is divided into seven days and those into hour long slots, and true to form, everything is colour-coded. School is green, Mathletes is blue, and so-called ‘Janis time’ is purple. Her name is written in silver glitter pen rather than black ballpoint, and there’s a little star doodled in the corner. It’s nothing short of adorable, and Cady’s cheeks go pink as he knowingly catches her eye. “Gretchen says she can’t do weekdays, so I might squeeze her in on Saturday mornings.” She takes the page and tilts it, scrunching up her face. “Wonder how many more I can fit in.”

“How much tutoring does she need exactly?” he asks.

“It’s not just Gretchen,” she says, shrugging. “I just thought, well, why not expand it. See who else needs tutoring? I could make some money off of it. And it looks great on-”

“The college applications,” he finishes, earning an eyeroll from her. Still, they both smile. “I think that’s a great idea little slice. As long as no-one’s faking stupid to score a date with you.”

“Oh hush,” she chides, swatting at him playfully. “Besides, no one would dare. Half our grade is kind of terrified of Janis.”

“We all know she could still kick their collective asses.”

“Even hopped up on chemo, she could.”

“Yeah, completely.” Something shifts inside him, and suddenly his smile feels more plastered on that natural. Keep it together, he tells himself. “So has anyone gotten back to you about tutoring?”

“I haven’t put the word out yet,” she says. “Although I did make this!” She reaches into her bag and hands another page to him, this time with a photo of her in the centre and “Tutoring Services-Math and Science, specialising in calculus” printed below it, and her phone number and email address in a different, cursive font below. And true to form, she decorated it with little ClipArt lions and tigers. “What?”

“Nothing.” He hands her it back. “It’s just very you. And if I needed help with math, I’d call you in an instant.”

“You flatter me,” she jokes, putting it back in her backpack and dropping it on the floor. It catches his eye and he doesn’t understand why it would for a second, but then he remembers. She bought this backpack the day they went to the mall. She picked the white one with the little frogs. Janis had laughed at it, affectionately calling her a ‘permanent child’. That was the day Janis had passed out. The day she had overslept. The day before she had gotten that doctor’s appointment. And all the while, none of them knew the truth. None of them had put the pieces together.

“Damian?”

“Oh, yeah.” He nods quickly. “Yes, you should definitely do that.” Across from him, Cady’s eyebrows are shot up, her mouth half open. He’s blown it. Whatever ‘it’ is.

“Okay,” she sighs. “Um… are you okay?”

“Of course I’m okay.” He leans back in his chair and tosses his head. “Look at me, I’m the King of Okay, baby girl.”

“I know a bad Doctor Who reference when I hear one,” she tells him. She taps her pencil on the desk. If she knows a Doctor Who reference, then he can recognise a tell. She’s building up to something. “Look, it’s okay if you’re not okay. I mean what’s going on right now with Janis… it’s rough. It’s okay if you’re a little out of it. I am too.”

“Well that’s fine, but I’m not.”

The words shock him as soon as they leave his mouth. He wouldn’t be surprised if he hadn’t said them at all, rather someone behind him, and he wishes that were the case. He’s not like that. Those words are sharp and he’s rarely ever sharp. He made himself a promise never to be sharp or cruel or nasty unless absolutely necessary. He’s put in so much work over the years building up his cheerful, warm persona and it took a while for it to become fully natural. Apparently, he still needs work, because Cady’s face is falling at his outburst and she’s turning around him her chair and his gut is twisting and churning with guilt.

“Caddy, wait.” He reaches out and grabs her shoulder. “I’m-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it to come out like that. It’s just-I’m so sorry, Caddy.”

“Hey.” Cady takes his hand and wraps her own around it, giving it a comforting squeeze. “It’s okay. Everything’s a lot right now.” Is it? Well, it is anyone can see that. But he’s coping, he’s sure of it. He woke up today so full of happiness he may have burst. How did he go from that to this in the space of an hour?

“Yeah,” he simply says. He runs his thumb over Cady’s knuckles, still shaken from what he said. He grips her hand tighter as if that can make sense of it. “I’m sorry.”

Despite Cady telling him it’s okay, a bad feeling follows him around all day, guilt combined with something else he can’t figure out. It leaves him feeling nauseous and uneasy all through his classes and even during lunch with his friends. It sits there all day, right in the pit of his stomach and wearing him out. By the time his first class after lunch starts, all he wants to do it go home. That very last bell is music to his ears and he barely remembers to bid goodbye to his friends before bolting out the door.

His hands are cold and unsteady as he pulls books out of his locker, his heart beating quickly and faintly beneath his shirt. He checks his phone, his messages empty, and makes a mental note to text Cady later before closing his locker and heading to the front gate. Hopefully by the time he gets home he’ll have come back to himself.

“Damian!”

Oh god, he thinks, suppressing a sigh. Ms Towers slips out in front of him, a file held close to her chest and her glasses perched on her head. She’s the school guidance counsellor, someone he’s never really interacted with. All of his issues were either fixed or in the process of that by the time he reached high school. She sure had her work cut out for her when the Burn Book was released though.

“Um, hi,” he says.

“Could I grab a quick word with you?” she asks.

No you cannot is what he wants to say. The school bell has gone, I’m free now.

“Sure,” is what he says instead, and his body follows her into her little office and even takes the seat she offers. It’s only when she sits down that he turns off autopilot. “Is this going to take long? Only I’ve got a lot of homework.”

“Not long at all,” she replies. She clears her throat, pretends to fix some papers on her desk, and leans forwards on the desk, her hands clasped beneath her. “Damian, what you’re going through is very difficult.”

“That’s indeed one word for it.”

“And the schoolboard is fully aware of any challenges you might be facing this year,” she goes on. “You probably know your teachers are all aware of the toll this may take on your schoolwork.” He hadn’t actually thought of that before. “But there are many support systems in place outside of the classroom. I want you to know that if you need any of them, we would be more than happy to schedule something for you. You could talk to me, or one of my colleagues on the care team, during one of your free periods maybe once or twice a week? Or if you want, our pastoral care team would be more than willing to talk to you in the school chapel-”

The image of Damian sitting in a church sitting on a pew talking to a priest about anything is so ludicrous to him that he actually bursts out laughing in her face.

He’s really being the resident asshole today, isn’t he?

“Sorry,” he replies, making a show of clearing his throat. “Something caught in my throat. You know how it is.”

“Oh, of course. I can get you some water if you like.” He shakes his head, taking his own bottle out of his bag, and gives her a gesture to keep talking. “Just if you want to avail of any of these services, they’re here. We’re all here for you Damian. So… do you think you might?”

“I appreciate the offer,” he says. His hand wraps tightly around his knee. “I really do. But I’m fine. I don’t need any school therapy or anything like that.”

“I don’t mean therapy,” she says. “Well, I could. But just if you needed a quick chat. This is a hugely stressful situation.”

“I know,” he snaps. He takes a deep breath in. He feels as though his insides are shaking, like a town caught in an earthquake. “I know. But I’m fine. I’m coping. And I have my own people anyway. I’ve got my friends; I’ve got my mom.” He stands on sore and unsteady legs and puts his bag on his back. “Besides, everything’s fine. Janis is coming home this weekend and we’re going to have a movie night and it will be exactly like it always has been. So we’re all good here.”

He lets her nod before bolting out the door. He doesn’t let anyone slow him down this time as he runs outside, down the front path and out the school gates, only starting to slow down when he’s off that street.

All the while, he doesn’t let himself think about Ms Towers’ offer, because doesn’t need it. He’s good. He’ll make himself good if he has to. He’s had enough practice at that after all.

*****

Saturday night takes forever to come around. The clocks on the wall tick by too slowly no matter where he is. Janis must get home late on Friday, because at some time after nine she posts a video of her dog cuddling her on her bed with the caption ‘I missed this boosh so much’. While Maxie takes up half the screen, he can see the smile in her cheeks. She looks good, healthy, happy, and that’s the main thing.

But finally the time comes, and he’s standing on her doorstep with a rucksack full of treats, DVDs, and the sleepover essentials. Butterflies flutter in his stomach, something he hasn’t felt since the early teens, and he has to hold back his arm lest he press the doorbell again.

“Hubbard!”

“Sarkisian!”

The moment he’s in her house, he envelopes her in a hug, letting her head rest in his shoulder and his hand rubbing up and down her back. His knees buckle in relief once she’s back with him, back hugging him. Sure he’s seen her before back in the hospital, but that was too alien. This is home. This is real.

“Missed you, dork,” she whispers.

“Missed you more,” he replies. When they finally let each other go, he sees her dressed down, blue and green galaxy leggings and a deep purple sweatshirt with a cartoon dinosaur on the front. Sleepover wear.

In the living room, Laura is setting up a bowl of popcorn and a try of tortilla chips, as well as a litre bottle of water and one of lemonade. She brightens up at the sight of him, hugging him lightly like you would a family member.

“Nice to see you, kid,” she tells him. “Hey how were the auditions? Janis told me they were this week.”

“Oh yeah,” he replies. It’s an effort not to wince. “They were fine. You know.”

“Well, we’ll be expecting front row tickets,” she tells him. “And a discount.”

“Sorry Laura no can do. Janis knows the importance of providing funds for the drama club.” Behind her mom, Janis nods as she fiddles with the DVD player.

“Oh, Janis, hon, let me do that.”

“It’s fine,” she replies, force behind the words. “I’ve got it. Besides you’re the one always asking me how to work it.”

“Fair enough,” she mutters. “Well, you two enjoy your night. I’m just down the hall if you need anything.”

“Cool. Thanks Mom.”

“Do you want me to take the dog out?”

“We can keep him. I think he’s missed Damian anyway.”

“And I’ve missed him,” Damian adds in. Maxie is pawing at Damian’s legs, his head rubbing against his legs and his tail wagging.

“Okay, just make sure you keep him calm. Otherwise he won’t let you sleep.”

“We’ll keep him calm,” Janis promises. “He’s a good boy.”

Laura mutters something to the contrary as she leaves, the door clicking shut behind her. Janis rolls her eyes at her.

“She’s so mean to the baby,” she says, patting the ground. “Come here Maxie-boy. Isn’t mama just the meanest and nastiest to the poor baby boy?”

“Should I leave you two alone?” he asks, only half-joking. Janis looks up from where she was making kissy faces at her dog and chuckles.

“I missed him,” she says. “Can you blame me? Imagine not letting your dog into the hospital with you.”

“It’s lunacy all right.” He kneels down beside her, opening up his rucksack. “Okay, I brought chocolate peanuts, I brought mini pretzels, I brought sour gummies. And to top it off, I brought your faves… crispy NemNems!” He holds up the box of M&Ms, wiggling them in her face. She bats them away, grinning.

“Perfection. Okay, what do we watch first?”

“You pick. That’s the rule after all, remember?” he reminds her. “Your house, your rules.”

“Okay. Then I pick…” She holds up the DVD to him; A Nightmare On Elm Street and wiggles her eyebrows. One of her favourites, which just so happens to be one of his least favourites. He’s not a horror fan. It’s one of the few disagreements they have.

“Deal. But I may have to hide behind your hair.”

They settle themselves on the couch, a pair of blankets resting on the heater behind them and Maxie plopped on top of them for extra warmth. His little head is on Janis’ lap, demanding pets, and she is only too happy to oblige. He snuggles further into her with his paws up on his legs and whimpering whenever she so much as shifts.

“Someone missed you.”

“Yeah he did,” she replies, her voice fond. “You know when I came into the kitchen last night he peed himself because he was so excited.” She leans down to the dog and starts speaking in what they call her ‘Maxie-voice’. “Didn’t you to a peepee on the floor and Daddy had to mop it up?”

“Awww. Also ewww.” Janis digs him the ribs even as she laughs. Maxie is oblivious to this, his ears pricking up as he looks between the two of them. Damian cracks open the snacks, already commandeering the tortilla chips (what can he say, he’s a carb lover) and placing the rest of them delicately between them before opening the M&Ms and handing them to Janis.

“Oh, thanks…” She picks a few out of the bag while holding the dog down with the other hand, lest he eat something he shouldn’t.

When he looks back in the bag, it’s like no-one took anything. Sure enough, there’s probably only three or four in her hand right now. And they’re one of her favourite things in the world, ever. She’s hidden them under pillows at sleepovers before. Before he can stop, she notices him looking and gives him a shrug.

“I’m just not that hungry,” she explains, taking a sip of the water. “It’s fine.”

It’s fine. There you go. She said it’s fine, so it’s fine.

Despite that reassurance, and against his better judgement, he doesn’t stop taking peeks at her as the movie goes on. It’s probably a good thing he doesn’t like this movie. She picks at the food she would normally be fighting him for, eating a pretzel here and there and nothing else, only long, slow drinks of water. The hair on the back of his neck pricks up at it, his instincts once again kicking in.

Maybe instead of instincts, he thinks he might just be paranoid. Janis said that she hadn’t had much of an appetite recently. It’s just a side effect of the medicine. Nothing to be worried about, surely, especially with the way her eyes are wide and her grin is excited and bright, the way she jumps at scares she’s seen ten times over and ‘ooh’s at Freddy coming down the hall. She even calls him a ‘magnificent bastard’. Why should he focus on what she’s eating when she’s still her and is in good spirits? With that in mind, he turns his attention to the movie, properly this time, accompanied by Janis’ rantings and commentary.

When he does lose focus on Freddy Kruger again, it’s nothing to do with Janis or ‘instincts’, but rather nature calling, courtesy of a half-empty lemonade bottle on the floor. He stretches his stiff legs and turns to let her know, probably having to tap her to pull her out of the movie… only to find her curled in on herself, eyes closed, lips slightly parted. Her hand rests limply on Maxie and her chest rises and falls slowly. How long has she been like that, he wonders.

“Janis?” he whispers. Nothing. “Janis.” She doesn’t move, doesn’t even flinch. That’s her for the night.

She looks younger in sleep, especially without make-up. And a lot less tough. It’s easier to see her as the little girl he met crying in a bathroom all those years ago. But she was tough even then, and she’s even stronger now. He rises slowly, careful not to wake her. Maxie is still awake, but antsy at sitting down for too long.

“Come here, kid,” he says quietly to him. He lifts Janis’ hand a little and coaxes him off her, patting his knees until he reluctantly climbs down. He settles beside her instead, sitting beside the couch like a little guard dog. “Good boy.” Next he takes the blanket from the heater and throws it over her, making sure to tuck it over her shoulders. That’s what moves her, and for a second he panics, but she only murmurs something and burrows into it. His heart swells in that moment, and he presses a swift kiss to her head.

“Good night, kid,” he whispers, even if it’s still light outside.

He doesn’t go home after that. He sticks around all night, despite Janis’ mother asking if he wants to go home. Neither one of her parents are surprised she fell asleep, telling him she’s tired a lot in the hospital. Her dad heaves a sigh before telling him that’s how they know it’s working. Damian nods, unsure of what else to say, and heads back to the living room. The idea of leaving her alone in there unsettles him for whatever reason.

He slides Cabaret into the DVD player, the volume at 2 and the subtitles on. At least if Janis does wake up, it’ll be to something she likes. For now he bounces between watching the movie and watching her until he gives up entirely. He changes spreads himself on the couch next to him, the light from his phone the only light on in the room. As he does start to doze off, a mere four hours after Janis, he starts thinking about what her dad said. If this is how they know everything’s working, then he can take it. Because it means she’ll be okay at the end.

#mean girls fanfic #mean girls broadway #mean girls the musical #damian hubbard #janis sarkisian #cadnis #cadnis ff #mean girls ff #despite that cadnis is barely in this chapter ....#fic: heart of stone #look its a damian pov!

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bilgisticallykosher · 4 years

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Selfishness vs. Selfishness Redux

Pre-episode thoughts. I don't think they're going to address the dark side Everybody-already-knew-that thing right away. I'm still thinking Deceit's gonna be Virgil, but I'm also not so certain that's going to wind up going down. Because there's a lot of other stuff to get into. We know from the first Asides that stuff between Virgil and Patton is growing, and simmering. It's coming, and while that's in the future, there's probably going to be more build-up here. Is it that Patton knew about Virgil's past? Is it something else entirely? This is going to be a two hour episode, geez.

Also, I can't believe he's actually going to the wedding. Idk. All those people saying he got the date wrong, though? First of all, Logan is in charge of the schedule, he'd never let that happen, how dare? And also, I always double check dates and invitations for stuff. I really doubt Virgil wouldn't have looked at the invitation and checked the information again. Watch me be totally wrong now.

I don't know who I think the cloaked figure is. Could be Deceit ("like a freaking Scooby Doo villain"), could be Thomas himself. Probably not Organization XIII, but I'm not completely eliminating the option, let me have this.

Things I'd like, but am 99% certain won't happen; Deceit's name (which I'm both hoping and expecting to not start with D), a new side, Remus and Deceit interacting on camera, or really Remus at all. Except for that green score of BOOBS, I maintain that's Remus's contribution.

ALRIGHT, LET'S GO, I'M NOT READY!!!!

First impression of the thumbnail. You vs. Yourself???? Oh my gosh. Ohhhh, I'm freaking out. Patton looks so apprehensive, and I don't know if that's on general, or because of Roman or in response to Roman, because Roman looks so annoyed at Patton! He's so angry oh my gosh. I mentioned I wasn't ready, right? Okay. Okay. So their sprites are different styles, which is cool. Patton's looks risk-based stroll around town type of RPG, Roman's looks fighting style.

The options for the character select???? Oh my gosh, that's. Hi, Remus. Anyway, uh, I don't know what this means, but there's three character options on top and- DARK SIDES ARE SEPARATE FROM LIGHT SIDES! Oh gosh, I was thinking maybe it was something to do with specifically Logan. Ooh, Deceit's in his lawyer outfit, nice touch. THERE'S AN EXTRA BLANK PLAYER OPTION. I don't know if that means he'll be revealed this episode, or just that he exists. I mean, we just had Deceit's logo, Remus's reveal and name reveal… here goes.

IT STARTS WITH THE VIDEO GAME??? THIS IS THE INTRO????? THE WEDDING??????!!!!!!! Oh hey word crush. Oh hey, it's the couple! Starting to think this is a dream or fantasy, btw. Also, Lee and Mary Lee sound like...Esteban and Valerie? Maybe? Idk. Omg, Life is pain.

This is awkward, beautiful. Pfft, hence the marriage. Photographer is great, no idea who he or the emcee are. Ooh. Crushed.

INTRO??? EXCUSE ME??? Oh was SvS originally on 3/31? Yeah, good, play a review like all of us haven't been obsessing over what happened last time. "APRIL 13" I'm just going thi pause forever now. Oh this is going to be the angry walk in that was previewed in the bloopers, I can tell. Oh no. OH NO! And it is at night and he seriously freaking actually went to the wedding????

Oh my gosh he's so angry. Ohhh, Patton rethinking his phrasing, nice. You should never→I'm surprised that you etc. Oh Roman! Oh, maybe we should… not review. Oh boy.

Oh there's Patton's avatar. In then guitar hero thing. Oh, Thomas is associated with the color white, confirmed??? I like how they did the notes there. So much detail. The talk sprites are great, but the expressions on the dancing sprites are worth paying attention to. Okay, Patton's still very, um, defensive, I guess is the word? Thomas is angry and bereft and confused and full of doubt, and Roman's heavily on the confused side (ha) about him aligning with Deceit. This is why he stole his hat. Great animation work, everyone, that was fantastic, artists!

"Why didn't I just talk to them before the wedding?" THOMAS. Also, because Deceit specifically prevented Logan from being too close to the courtroom scene by benching him and not asking him what his idea of a compromise was. "I brought that up," well, you did, but Deceit kinda made it seem like you were suggesting lying to them, so you got shut down. Sorry, Ro. Listen, I love Deceit, but the boy's a manipulator.

We learn to predict the future!!! Roman, no. Woah, Patton's just being completely dismissive. I mean he's been through some hard times the last few episodes, minus LNTAO, but damn. Oh. Roman's very much defending Patton. This forebodes very badly. This is going to explode terribly. Oh no.

Okay, so, the thing with the feral cats. Is Roman okay? Did someone do this to him? More importantly, did he do this to me? Also, on a serious note, I'm super shocked Deceit hasn't come in yet, because he (and Thomas, and arguably Patton) is obviously regretting going to the wedding. I mean, Virgil's not coming in right away because of the reveal at the end of DWIT, but- hey where's Logan?! Logan and Deceit should both totally be here! *gasp* Except in the one on one episodes (Heart vs. Mind, My Negative Thinking, Logince; the argument) it's always primarily been the two sides that are featured with the others either not there or off-screen or making small cameos. But Deceit was and is an important part of this decision past, present, and going forward!

Oooh, I like the Lee and Mary Lee backstory. Hm. Patton does bring good points, but. I still agree with- oh, Thomas just solidly saying no made me snort. Okay, so speaking of the coin bleeping, why the video games? I know there's more to come with it, how do they come into play? Oh okay metaphor.

That was clearly not the good ending, Roman. Bringing up Is Thomas A Good Person again. OOH xylophone, is he a-comin'? Oh he's directly blaming Patton. Wow, Roman.

A BAGEL?! Oh, game sssssssstore. Really? Frogger, Pat? 16 graphics. Oh there's the hotdogs. OH and there's the cloaked guy! Smashing our theories. That does not seem like Sondheim.

The puns, oh my gosh, brilliant. Getting to the meat of them here. Gosh these graphics are fantastic. 6AM dull.

Oh. Hm. Technically, he does not have to give him the 'dog. The building tension is fascinating.

HI, LOGAN! Patton looking real uncomfortable at "regret." I mean, they all know they regret it now, right? Roman making fun of behoove, that's so funny, I have no idea why. Seriously, whoever's doing the art, I'm dying at Logan's expressions. Woah good thing viewers have the pause button. I'm all for not buying X-mas decorations. I'm doing my part, goyim.

I'm counting "it's not like Kingdom Hearts" in lieu of that having been Organization XIII. Oh boy, Patton. Right thing vs. Feeling good vs. Feeling good about doing the right thing. This is falling apart. Patton's noise.

BOOBS omg Deceit is Bowser. I love that painting in the background! Scutes! Time went from limited to being lost to poorly spent to wasted! I'm standing by the purple being Virgil. Fyi, in Judaism, doing a good thing for the wrong reasons doesn't matter, because you're still doing the good thing, even if it's just for the reward. There's a thing about it with Avraham and a King.

Roman's getting close to breaking. Reptilian rapscallian guy. And who's to say he can't be doing it for the reward and to help people?

"... an individual's happiness and the amount of selfless acts…" that should be number, not amount, Logan! Can't judge good deeds only by how good you feel when you do them.

Okay, here we go. How do we know what's Right? Killing and stealing is illegal everywhere, yes, Thomas, what are you doing, Thomas???

Oh my gosh, not the trolley problem. They're referring to Deceit as Denial and Roman as Passion! Oh gosh, that looks like Joan, Talyn, Dot, Valerie, and Terrence, and Leo by himself, maybe? Oh geez, I jolted. Logan index carding for trolley problem.

Unus Annus is right, the trolley problem is stupid. Oh my gosh, Logan's giant wall of text physically pushing Patton back, I spit all over my screen. Skip All.

Roman's… blaming himself? Oh!!! Are we getting Roman's insecure arc???!!! This is a complex issue, and Patton's having a hard time backing down, and everyone's feeling bad.

Scared?! I hear music! NO. Why is he scared, oh my gosh?????? That's not a tired metaphor. Oh! I've heard of hypoxia! It was hypothesized (and disproven) to be the reason for a specific Bermuda Triangle incident.

Good point, Logan. Regarding theory and in the moment instincts. Remus mention with intrusive thoughts! Shocked that Logan is arguing for leisure time. Logan's self satisfied smirk at the self-sacrifice. GLITCHY! Oh he's a frog. Lilypadton.

Oh my gosh I'm getting so stressed. Yes, thank you, Logan for the scream. I… don't. The conscientious comment. No, it's not. This seems… Deceit-y. IT IS! SHARP SIDE OH MY GOSH! Oh, he didn't rise up, he popped out in the freaking dialogue box, NO, FRICK IT WAS RIGHT THERE! And the Nietzsche and the specific examples that he used!!! I'm so angry! I DIDN'T THINK HE'D TAKE LOGAN'S PLACE AGAIN! I MISSED THE SIGNS!

Hey guys, look, it's Deceit. Bull… frog. Lord of the lies. Oh! 8-bit Deceit theme. Okay, the first thing Deceit said about him not doing it on purpose was nice, but yeah, those words striking him is accurate. Yeesh, harsh.

Is Patton eating his own words? Oh, uh, is anyone going to acknowledge he hit Thomas? Is that telling of the situation instead of just being a funny background event?

The crick in Thomas's neck is so funny. SNAKES ON THE PLANE!!! ...Hm. Happy that he brought that up. Oh my gosh, Deceit's spluttering, he's like so bad at things sometimes, I love it.

Logan! No, don’t do that, everybody appreciates you! Double curse? Pffffft, Logan. Deceit…definitely smiling at Logan's logic. Deceit is interesting here. Oh wow, yikes. He's really fascinating here. Legitimately complimentary? Oh, no, kind of not, maybe. Roman looks distressed.

"...Trees?" Roman's super pumped up. Good for him! Ha, his imitation. Deceit looking confused? Patton looking all sorts of things, I really think that Deceit is being genuine here- NAME?! I'D THIS HAPPENING? Why is he stripping? His, no, what does his glove have to do with his name?

………. Janice? Did he say Jenus or Janice. It sounded like Janice. Deceit. No. Oh, burn, Roman. Damn, he almost got me. His name is not Janice. No. It's not. Don't even. Deceit was being so straight(ha)forward for the past couple of minutes. Awww, Roman. Insecurity addressing time? Wait, why is Deceit nodding at the hero thing? His lip is trembling, his voice is cracking and oh no! Roman just sank out.

Don't call him Janice, that's not his name. Oh he's being genuine again. Patton's talking about himself. WAIT WHAT. He had a five second cameo, omg.

Yeah, those are the easier questions. No, Deceit, bad Deceit. Man, his facial expressions in this episode. Fractionally fiendish fibber. Oh, I like the reasons for Deceit being a part of him! That's… cute? Oddly cute, maybe. So, freaking how far in the future is the Asides?

Stop calling him Janice, that's not his name. Oh, Deceit and Thomas bonding. That snort, oh my gosh. Oh, serious Deceit again! That reaction to "you're right" is oddly similar to that fake laugh at the end of Embarrassing Phases.

………. Virgil's not here yet. His reveal isn't being addressed. Accepting Deceit. That's why he's so pissed at Patton in Asides. The next episode proper they're going to reveal that Deceit's accepted, more or less, and Patton was a big part of that, hugely changing his mind, that's why he's so pissed at him!!!

April 30th? Oh is this Lee and Mary Lee? I was wrong on the voices. Door-yelling! Hm. I mean. It's nice that they're acknowledging him, but I really don't think that sways the situation one way or another. Cute more background, and Thomas being awkward. They. This could have been instead of the wedding. Kingdom Hearts again!

Oh hi, Patton and Deceit. He seems annoyed at the situation. Patton and Deceit bonding. Hi again, Leslie. Wild.

This video really didn't go at all how I thought it would. Roman was barely miffed at Patton. Oh man, this was intense. I. Oh man. I need to process a lot. But I think we're on the right path, here. Janice is not his name!

Okay, I went on tumblr and two seconds in, I saw Janus, which I looked up and that makes way more sense. Another, more condensed post to follow. And several thousand reblogs.

#roman sanders #ts spoilers #janus sanders #patton sanders #logan sanders #virgil sanders #remus sanders #svs redux #character!thomas #sanders sides #new video reaction

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retro-rudy · 4 years

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Logic- No Pressure Album Review

In summation of Logic's career, the foremost qualities that can’t go unnoticed is the dedication, respect and admiration the man has always had for the art of hip-hop. From the beginning, dating back to his Young Sinatra mix-tape series, in an era where trap beats were overtaking hip-hop, Logic arrived as a breath of fresh air with his conscious driven lyrics and entertaining flow, fueled by the boom-bap style he enjoyed from earlier influences such as Wu-Tang Clan, A Tribe Called Quest, and Mos Def. Logic lived up to the hype and expectations by delivering a successful debut album and painting a promising future, in which, considering how the industry measures success, Logic went onto surpass by reaching the heights of mainstream play and various award nominations with his next 2 studio albums. Amid the commercial success came the broader spotlight, the very one that emphasized his every move, and drew fluctuated criticism to an all-time high for the Maryland emcee. The challenges for Logic however were not the subjective opinions people had towards his music, but rather stemmed from the more personal jokes, memes, and the non-music related opinions that seemed to overshadow the music he was creating for audiences. In 2019, these unfortunate circumstances led Logic to step away from music and social media for some time with no public explanation to the reasoning of his hiatus. That was until the ever so unpredictable 2020 saw Logic emerge with a staggering album announcement accompanied by an unexpected retirement announcement.

Logic, returned in 2020 as many anticipated, with his 7th and final studio album, No Pressure. The joint announcement of album date and retirement came on July 16th, just one week before the set album release date. While the announcement was abrupt and left many with lingering questions, the 1 week wait would eventually lead fans to the clear reasoning of his decision through No Pressure’s foundation of honest and convincing lyrics.

Right out of the gates, Logic sets the tone and premise of the direction he will take the album on the opening track, No Pressure Intro. Logic applies audio from the famous Orson Wells “The Hitchhiker” introduction, which Logic chops and edits perfectly to bring us into the album. Within the edits, Logic cites No I.D and The Incredible True Story to give the intro a fun twist that adds the thematic touch many have grown accustomed to in Logic’s discography. The fundamentally ear-hitting boom-bap beat produced by NO I.D could not have been curated any better for Logic on the opener. Logic and the instrumental go hand in hand as he delivers bar after bar for over a minute and a half before reaching an abrupt interruption that catapults you into the next track. “B*tch I’m too alive, like twins in a womb, come hither, consume” and “But it cost a fee to be the boss it cost to be, over possessions like an apostrophe.” are some of the more standout bars on this intro.

On No Pressure, Logic’s overall mood comes off positive, natural, motivated and unforced which benefits each song on this record in its own way. On songs such as Hit My Line, Celebration, and Amen, Logic’s unhinged and unpressed mind state injects everlasting life and validation to the long peace, love and positivity advocate. Logic’s comfort with his current-self shines through on Hit My Line with a confident, worry-free chorus and candid verses as he persuasively calls on god for a fixing of humanity. Logic’s positive drive has been a stapled message within his raps since the beginning of his career and the messaged remains well intact on Hit My Line and the entirety of this project. The confidence he shows when he says, “They say they don’t want messages in rap, it ruins the art. Well here I am people, yeah, now tear me apart.” further endorses his attempt of leaving it all out for this record with no regrets. Even on the track, Celebration, where Logic taps into his braggadocio side of rap to pen out the worry-free mindset he now has and how there is nothing for him to prove to anyone, you can hear the freeing mentality he has as he spits:

“It’s been a minute now; my style is feeling infinite now. Used to people pulling me down, it ain’t shit to me now. Don’t let it get to me now: threw out my phone, they can’t get to me now.”

These tracks dwell on a cheerful and flamboyant tempo that Logic ceases throughout the entirety of the tracks. The same can be said for songs like Dadbod, Perfect, and 5 Hooks, that show versatility in terms of beat choices and the ability of Logic to naturally execute each varying flow that comes off as effortlessly in this stage of his career.

Meshed in with the collection of the more upbeat and elated-expressive tracks, Logic sprinkles in tracks built off well executed hip-hop samples that serve up a heavier dose of conscious articulated bars. Dating back to the Young Sinatra mix-tapes, Logic has never been shy to wear his influences on his sleeve, and tracks like GP4 and Man i is prove this to the be the case in present day. GP4, a nostalgic tie-in with Logic’s Growing Pains’ song collection, which we last heard on Under Pressure, contains a sample constructed from OutKasts’ Elevators song from ATLiens. Given the track record of various and well-respected hip-hop samples Logic has placed on each of the Growing Pains’ tracks, this one fits cohesively with the bunch. Much like the previous Growing Pains’, Logic leans on his story telling to paint witty and mental pictures of a variety of thoughts floating in his mind. From adolescent memories, to admitting his once determination of becoming the greatest rapper alive now being inessential, Logic goes onto acknowledge how the greatest rapper alive might not even be rapping and is instead stacking groceries at an ordinary 9 to 5 with no care in the world, resembling much how Logic feels at this point in his career. On Man i is, Logic’s maturity and growth flourishes among the inspired instrumental created out of an iconic mashup consisting of OutKasts’ SpottieOttieDopaliscious, Tarika Blues’ Dreamflower, DJ Screw and Pimp C. Logic self-reflects as he looks back on where he came from and what he endured, to which through it all has led him to this point in life where he can confidently say he is sincerely proud of the man he has become. In hip-hop it’s made well-aware that high expectations are to be met when paying homage to classics and Logic absolutely fulfills the task on this one in a form that without a doubt places Man i is among the most prominent tracks within his discography. Open Mic\\Aquarius III keeps Logic on the lyrical prowess and serves as a bridge for fans to connect with the bar for bar artillery the emcee has long had. The beat switch that takes place in this track is superb with the pure hip-hop cypher sound of Open Mic interestingly transitioning into the more jazzy and mellow Aquarius III. The high-volume of bars continues immediately on the following track, Soul Food II. The deserving sequel to one of Logic’s held in high regards track off his debut album Under Pressure. Logic retains the format of spitting a series of bars as he did in the original Soul Food. It’s warming and evident to hear the growth in both, his mentality as a human and abilities of his craft as an artist when you hear both songs in sequential order. In Soul Food II, mentally, Logic remains as humble and passionate as ever while sonically the tone and delivery of his raps resonate with the listener enough to have them capture and break down his every word. This along with the metaphors within this song is what prompts Soul Food II to standout on its own and give its predecessor a run for its money, and dare I say, maybe even edge out the original.

On the last leg of the album is where I find Logic taking the listener towards the conclusion of the album on a pure, passion driven energy specifically due to the openness of Dark Place, and the spiritually motivating Heard Em Say. Dark Place is the first of its kind for the emcee as it is by far the most personal track Logic has ever released. While Logic has been open about personal situations before, it has never been to the degree and sentiment he lets out on the track. What was meant to remain an unreleased and personal track shares a transparent view of his feelings regarding the real toll the amount of negativity and criticism took on his mental state.

“Writin’ rhymes was easy before the fame. Now I’m constantly overthinkin’ every line, it’s a shame. Rap used to fill me with joy, now it’s nothin’ but pain. I’m stuck in the game, tryna get back from where I came.”

The entire song contains some of Logic’s most honest and heart-breaking lyrics that transport you directly to the most difficult year he experienced as a mainstream artist. “I’d love to end this on some positive shit. Hit you with punchlines instead of some derogative shit, but it’s okay to be sad sometimes and tired of shit.. I guess.” Logic becomes as relatable to the listener as ever with his sincerity on here. And while the song might show vulnerability, it’s okay. In the end the fan and artist label are irrelevant compared to the human label we all fall under. Another evident example of the earnest connection between Logic and his Rattpack. Fittingly so, the best in my opinion is saved for last. Heard Em Say easily ranks in the top 5 of Logic's entire released discography for me. From self-producing the song, to writing one of his most heartfelt verses, the song sums up as one of Logic’s most range defining cuts from an artist standpoint. The 3rd verse on Heard Em Say is one of Logic’s best verses from his discography, and impressively so isn’t due to the depth of lyricism, but due to Logic’s infinite passion heard throughout the verse. Logic grabs you with every word and instills raw emotion and inspiration with a hopeful send off in quintessential fashion Logic has long been known for.

After Confessions of a Dangerous Mind failed to reach favorable appreciation within hip-hop enthusiasts, and his fan base respectively; the project left many wondering if perhaps Logic’s better days were behind him. With unfavorable reviews and criticism weighing heavily on the emcee, Logic spent the better part of 2019 and 2020 writing raps vigorously on his Louis Vuitton rhyme book as he mentions on the freeing Amen. Logic stated in an interview with Nick Huff Barili of Hard Knock TV, that No Pressure essentially came to fruition out of his essential love for hip-hop no longer being intact, before coming to the conclusion of ending his career and delivering a final project in the form of which he came into the game with, a project he would give his every ounce of love for hip-hop to, to showcase pure hip-hop built on a foundation of bars and verses made up of the emcee’s best abilities. With executive production from No I.D, No Pressure achieves this and sees Logic set the record straight in his place among hip-hop. In retrospect, while the time apart might have been difficult, I believe both Logic and fans of Logic in the long run reached a perfect ending of a prominent and inspiring career. No Pressure serves as a celebrated accumulation and reflection of the inspiring emcees’ hip-hop career, the final chapter that gives the fan closure and comprehension for his farewell. Logic is now free of pressure and has found happiness by obtaining the greatest blessing in life, family. Thank you for delivering us this classic, and the best of wishes on your future endeavor Bobby. Final rating: 10

#Logic NoPressure hip-hop music review journalism Rattpack YoungSinatra Rap

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secret-diary-of-an-fa · 5 years

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Hidden Gems of the Silver Screen (And, to a Lesser Extent, the Telly)

It can’t have escaped your notice that the majority of my more recent posts (and fuck knows I’m not posting regularly at the moment) are about movies and TV. The reason for that is pretty simple: 2019 has, surprisingly, yielded some great movies and TV... and also some really torrid shite. On the one hand, films like Ma, Brightburn and The Perfection continue to breathe new life into the horror genre. On the other hand, sci-fi as a cinematic and televised thing continues to ignore its actual audience in favour of sniffing its own farts in a sound-proof chamber designed specifically for next-level virtue-signalling. One thing I will say about the dreck of 2019 is that it’s interesting dreck, at least so far. Another Life, for example, isn’t just bad: it’s mind-bogglingly, fascinatingly bad, as though someone set out to make the worst TV series imaginable and accidentally created a portal to another dimension made entirely of crap.

With all the amazingly wonderful and transifxingly terrible visual media on offer lately, it’s easy to forget that there’s a rich repository of films and TV series from just a few years ago that you’ve probably never watched. You see if you, like me, are a snooty, card-carrying member of the elitist intelligentsia, you probably missed films and TV series that looked dumb as soup on the surface on the grounds that they weren’t worth your time. Luckily for you, I’ve dived nose-first into the detritus of our dying culture, so you don’t have to, and I’ve ferreted out the diamonds from the pig-swill. Without further ado, I’d therefore like to present my list Easily Overlooked Gems.

1. Mandy The phrase “Nicholas Cage stars in a sword-and-sorcery rape/revenge thriller” does not inspire confidence. It’s therefore easy to ignore Mandy and the promptly forget it ever existed. Which is a shame, because it’s kind of a work of genius. The plot is exactly what you’d expect: a cult kidnaps, rapes and kills Cage’s girlfriend, Mandy, and Cage sets out on a mission of revenge culminating in a blood-bath. The nature of the revenge quest is what puts a sting in the film’s tail- or tale, if you’re feeling puntastic. You see, a lot of the bad guys exist in a constant hallucinatory haze after taking a drug that sent them mad after one dose. In order to fight on their level, Cage has to take a dose too. As a result, the world around him slowly but surely transforms into a nightmare landscape that looks like a cross between a D&D illustration and the cover of a heavy metal album and his grubby, personal mission of fury takes on the unmistakable resonance of a Conan-esque hero’s quest. By the end of the film, you have to wonder if Cage has actually slipped into some sort of alternate dimension or if he’s just lost his game-pieces completely. In places, it’s nearly as painful to watch as Landmine Goes Click (crikey, there’s one for the history buffs) but it looks and feels like Beyond the Black Rainbow. Worth your attention just because of how weird it is. I give it a solid four-out-five decapitated rapists.

2. Baby Driver Nothing about Baby Driver suggested it would be a good film: the way it was advertised as a car-chase movie trying to be cute; the stupid title; the fact that it came and went through cinemas like a fart in the night. Which is a shame, because it’s secretly brilliant. It’s a highly stylised crime film populated with the archest archetypes money can buy (to the point where some of the dialogue has a weirdly beat-poetic feel to it). It’s saturated colour palette and off-beat affect actually have something of a full-colour Jim Jarmusch flick about them. The hook, of course, is that the lead character (only ever referred to as Baby, because he’s got a punchably youthful face) has tinnitus and therefore has to listen to music constantly to drown at the buzzing in his head. The practical upshot of this is that a) every single scene is overlayed with surprisingly great and situationally appropriate music and b) he goes through life like he’s always dancing, so his way of moving lends to the film’s easy-going sense of flow. It also explains where his preternatural driving skills come from (I mean, not really, but within the context of the plot): he’s used to sliding effortlessly into patterns and rhythms because of the music thing. All of this could make a terrible film, of course, but execution is everything and, to everyone’s surprise, especially mine, this flick was executed with an astonishing level of panache. I rate it ten out of ten grizzly motor way pile ups.

3. Nightflyers It’s not just films that get overlooked as the tide of culture washes back and forth, like a great big sea of effluent. TV series also vanish unduly into the dustbin of history. Case in point, the criminally underappreciated Nighrflyers: Netflix pre-Another Life sci-fi offering that was actually good. It’s a pretty classic set-up: a group of mismatched wing-nuts on a spaceship, all of whom have secrets that that will threaten to tear them apart while they try to make contact with an alien life-form. What elevates Nightflyers is just how fuck-uped the cast are. There’s an angry British psychic whose spent his whole life in captivity in case he goes full Scanners on somebody’s head, a guy who only ever appears as a hologram for reasons too twisted to explain here, his evil mother whose uploaded her mind to the ship’s computer and gone batshit crazy, a genetic superbeing and a hacker who can send her mind into computers via a dodgy implant and who may or may not be drifting out of touch with the human condition. It’s great. 6 and half billion out of 7 billion monkeys, boiling in the void.

4. Hardcore Henry No, I don’t know who thought that title was a good idea either, but the point is that Hardcore Henry has no motherfucking right to kick as much arse as it does. It was clearly made on a budget that would embarrass a Youtube shampoo commercial, but it just flat-out rocks. Shot entirely in first-person, it follows the adventures of a mute cyborg as he seeks revenge against the bastard psychic entrepreneur who first built him then tried to kill him. Along the way, his main ally is a dude who keeps dying and coming back to life in a series of identical bodies but with radically different personalities and haircuts (this is eventually explained, but I’m not going to spoil it for you). It’s premise is demented, it’s surprisingly well-choreographed and its soundtrack is an aphrodisiac for your ears. Also, Tim Roth is in it, so that’s just yer seal of quality right there. It came out to a lot of fanfare and many, many cinema trailers back in the day and was then promptly forgotten about as soon as it launched. So I’m dragging it kicking and screaming back into the limelight. It’s on Netflix right now, so go watch it. I rate it a solid 11 out of 15 creepy duplicates of Tim Roth.

5. Upgrade Another lesser-known film about a cyborg. Unlike Henry, however, this cyborg’s life doesn’t so much ‘rock’ as ‘suck balls’. He gets crippled and then ends up with a sentient computer chip in his head that allows him to remote-control his own body despite not having a working spine anymore. Naturally, his experimental tech attracts the attention of some unsavoury characters and he and his brain-chip have to work together to figure out what’s going on, often through a series of ultra-violent, gory fight-scenes that horrify the protagonist himself. Of course, all might be well, except that the head-chip is a homicidal little shit that clearly has its own agenda. I give it at least 0000 0111 out of 0000 1001 painstakingly restored vintage kill-bots.

6. The Tick The Tick isn’t as overlooked as everything else on this list, especially since there have been a couple of previous televised incarnations of the franchise to lay the groundwork. However, I still feel like the modern iteration doesn’t quite get the love it deserves, so I’m throwing it out here. Following the adventures a mad, amnesiac and possibly stupid superhero and his neurotic sidekick, The Tick explores a world where superheroes aren’t the paragons of good from classic comics, the corrupt psychotics of The Boys or Watchmen, or the eternally struggling, walking moral life-lessons of modern cinema. Instead, they’re just ordinary people operating at various levels of competence/incompetence and mental illness and working within a bureaucratic, wildly inefficient framework. That might not sound like a recipe for a successful TV series, but it really is. Drawing out the mundane, human side of heroes and villains against the backdrop of cataclysmic, civilisation-threatening events makes for infinitely compelling and very, very funny viewing. It’s kind of doing for the superhero genre what Futurama did for sci-fi a few years back. It’s also where the phrase and/or popular song ‘seven billion monkeys boiling in the void’ comes from. My rating is four out of five sapient, homosexual boats (which will make sense when you watch it).

7. The Void Amid the high-budget horror extravaganzas of recent years, it’s easy to forget about the void, which feels like the best story H.P. Lovecraft never wrote and looks like David Chronenberg tried to adapt a Heironimous Bosch painting... in the ‘80s. The actual plot concerns a group of people getting trapped in a hospital by murderous cultists and discovering dark secrets and, arguably, a whole other dimension in its basement. You’re not exactly there for the plot though: The Void is a mood-piece and an exercise in visual FX craftsmanship. You’re there to drink in the atmosphere and see what each new cosmic horror looks like. I am delighted to award it ten out of ten unspeakable whisperers in the darkness. That’s enough for two barbershop quartets, an emcee and a supporting act.

8. Happy Death Day It’s Groundhog Day but as a horror film starring a really annoying lass in her late teens has to keep dying horribly until she learns to stop being such a terrible person... and also kill her murderer with a little help from her newly-minted, non-cunty friend. There’s a sequel that I haven’t seen yet, but the original is a low-key, oft-overlooked delight. I give it 9 out of 11 suspiciously similar corpses.

#Secret Diary of a Fat Admirer #films #tv shows #movies #Mandy #Baby Driver #Nightflyers #The Tick #The Void #Tick #happy death day #Upgrade

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lunawings · 5 years

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King of Prism SSS 2nd Day Greeting Show at Wald9 3/3/2019

Today I went to a 2nd day greeting show for King of Prism SSS Part 1 at Wald9.

In attendance was Junta Terashima (Shin), Takuma Nagatsuka (Leo), Yuma Uchida (Yu), and of course Masashi Igarashi (Minato).

As I thought, it was waaaaay different from the live viewing I saw of the 1st day greeting show. There were only four of them this time, they were dressed really casually, no press. Instead of all of them being interviewed by someone else, they were basically on their own to do whatever they wanted. Junta-san had the program on a clipboard in his hands and was supposed to be emcee but he was really bad at it. The others were kinda like "weren't you supposed to do this?" and he was kinda like "oh yeah haha I wasn't going by the schedule" pfffffffft.

They even acknowledged how awkward the greeting show was yesterday since they had to be super careful not to spoil things at the time. Since this greeting was after the movie finished they could talk about whatever they wanted. And they did. Oh boy they did!

To be honest I didn't understand most of what they were saying because they were just talking and joking like crazy so fast like a runaway train about random specific things from Part 1. They were pretty self aware of this, being like “ahahah I guess all day’s gonna be like this huh” like I think this was a terrible (=good) combination of members to have. At one point they were just going on and on and on I swear for several minutes about this like three second part of SSS episode 1 where Minato is cooking in the bath (he does this in Pride the Hero too).

At one point they were teasing Igarashi-san because his collar was popped at the back for some reason. And they were like "are you trying to do kabuki style or something?!" and he was like “no, no I was trying to do Ride on Sportsmanship Style" (whatever that means ahaha I guess he thought that was sporty). But somehow this just devolved into Igarashi-san trying to imitate kabuki anyway?!

At some point they had asked the audience if anyone was new to King of Prism and a few people raised their hands. Igarashi-san then launched into this very expressive and active description of what a prism jump is. And Junta said something kinda like (intending to be apologetic) "For people who are new to the series... this guy comes with the package... (so get used to it)"

Then later in Igarashi-san's final speech to the audience he was addressing the new fans again, saying that King of Prism is weird but keep watching and you'll grow to love it. And when he said that Naganyan was like pointing at him. The audience cracked up and I’m not totally sure if he noticed, I think he thought we were laughing at his speech ahahah. He also forgot the order of the series. He was like "And also watch Pride the Hero, and Rainbow Live and... wait" and the audience had to tell him about the first movie. But I don't blame him because the first movie has a weird name ("By PrettyRhythm") and I never use it either ahaha.

I always talk about Igarashi-san so much but if you've seen him at an event like this you'd understand. Anyway.

So I have seen the Edel Rose boys in real life once before, at the MRS concert. But that was from much farther away. I was only in the 7th row of the theater which is pretty darn good. Much closer to the front than the back.

So I’m pretty sure Junta Terashima saw me. He must have. Other than being, well, the only foreigner, I was was also dead center and I had a large Shin fan that’s old and kinda rare.

Actually he looked in my direction a. LOT.

But the thing is, I was sitting basically exactly where he would look naturally if he just turned to the audience. So it was hard to tell if he was looking at me specifically or not.

But there was this one particular moment.

Someone else was making a long speech about something, I think it was Yuuma, and I moved my eyes back over to Junta for whatever reason. And that just happened to be the time when he decided to look back up at the audience, for whatever reason.

And I am like.... 85% sure... he looked RIGHT at me.

And because I just had no idea what to do I think my face must have been really weird maybe something like:

nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnngggggggggggggghn

So the idea that Junta Terashima is now vaguely aware that I exist is actually pretty likely.

#king of prism #king of prism sss #kinpri #shiny seven stars #king of prism shiny seven stars

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hoshigomi · 5 years

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Takarazuka Special 2018- Say! Hey! Show Up!

Man, am I lucky to be able to see so many incredible things in Japan. Under the cut are all the thoughts I had about this year’s TCA special! Forewarning- they’re hardly cohesive, they’re very personal and biased, they’re SUPER LONG because I’m not writing this for anyone in particular or editing it whatsoever, and they’re whatever came to mind between the two showings or while waiting at intermissions!

The Beni/Tamakichi/Mirio/Daimon group is like. Something else. You put all four of them up there and they split off into FACTIONS, and it turns out to be Beni vs. Everyone which melts into Beni and Tamakichi vs. Daimon and Mirio and by that I mean if Beni and Tamakichi are teasing Daimon and Mirio MAN can those two sweet, sweet women not hold up. Beni is a troll. Beni is relentless. I’d call her a predator to Mirio and Daimon’s prey. The teasing never ended- but to that end, the laughter never ended either, and honestly, I loved them. I loved it. They were all charming and they all shone and the way their personalities differ (OOH do their PERSONALITIES DIFFER) was the most obvious and beautiful thing in the world. We have a FUN set of top stars, y’all. It was nice to see them all together.*

*I missed Makaze for a lot of reasons, most notably: 1.) she would have made for another great target for Beni to give hell to, and 2.) there were a lot of silk, deep, deep v-necks, and it’s kinda cruel to leave Makaze out of that, don’t you think. See you next year, Soragumi. Your energy was missed.

Daimon can’t eat gluten??? She certainly didn’t eat any bread in France, which has everyone including me pretty aghast.

Tamakichi used to? Swim? Play HANDBALL? They for sure teased her about being in the Olympics at the noon showing, but that’s as far as my Japanese got me. Makes sense though because have you seen her shoulders?

Sorry I need to say AGAIN how much Beni Ran This Shit. She IS the oldest top right now, by a year to Daimon and Mirio and like...more years to Makaze and MORE years to Tamakichi, and I’m sure that’s part of it, but I think the other part is that she’s a natural born emcee and comedian and she knows it. When I watch Beni I think ‘oh my God I love you so much for so many reasons,’ I love that woman. That’s my top star. But then MAN, I can ABSOLUTELY SEE how those reasons might make someone else feel the exact opposite. She also like applied herself for a bunch of this show and oooohhhhh it’s so lovely when she does.

Tamakichi asked Mirio and Beni to talk about going to Taiwan, and they sung the little ditty that I don’t know the name of but clearly is done every time they go to Taiwan because they both knew it. Beni also spoke some Chinese for the Taiwanese live viewing audience.

There was also talk about why they all chose their final songs, how their years went and what each troupe did, and some general banter.

Aside from the Top Stars and Todoroki Yuu, no one really spoke. The Top Musumeyaku certainly didn’t talk. To be TOTALLY HONEST, as far as this live viewing went at least, unless you’re Top Star, nibante, Top Musumeyaku, or Kacha/Hanagata Hikaru/Akira/Kai you don’t seem to have TOO MUCH camera time. Still thankful for the fact that they do the live viewings! But it IS tough to spot your whoever-else, unless they’re doing their little solos.

Moving on from our lovely Top Stars, here’s the quick-n-dirty lowdown on what stood out to me in the show! (I’m sorry if I missed your favorite, there were a lot of people, a lot going on, and I’m REALLY biased towards watching certain people.)

Miya had a lot of great stuff. She and Saki both had some funky songs with acoustic accompaniment. Saki’s had kind of a Western vibe. (Like cowboys, not like Western Hemisphere.)

Sorry, back to Miya, I really really hope she hangs on to top. She has her act together. She knows what she’s doing onstage, she’s pretty polished, and I personally really really dig the general tone of her voice, especially when she goes a little high.

I saw the show twice. Both times, when Coto came on for her solos, whoever the person next to me was like SLOW NODDED. Same, seat neighbors. God she’s good. She’s looking a lot more grown up! She’s CUTE. I’m kinda obsessed! I can’t like compliment Coto enough. Y’all know how good she is. She stands out just because she’s THAT GOOD.

Maaya Kiho. Maaaaaya. Maaya, come back to Hoshigumi so I can see you every day of my life. That girl has SOMETHING SPECIAL. Her energy is unique and a little aggressive but flirtatious? She has one of my favorite voices in the company, hands down. She knows how to work that like specific musumeyaku sexuality but you can kind of totally tell she also wanted to be an otokoyaku. She has that IN her. I love Maaya. I want to listen to like four hours of just Maaya.

If I had to listen to something else for four hours, it would be Ari singing Yami Ga Hirogaru.

If I had to listen to something ELSE it might be Aasa because her voice is definitely UNIQUE in a way that really pleases me.

I also want to quickly shoutout to Tom for running as much of this as she did- and I want to comment that I like....like her voice. It has a REALLY unique quality to it now. She’s really interesting to listen to, and she’s still truckin’!

I want Mao Yuuki and Mikkii to stand exclusively next to each other for as long as they’re both in Hoshi because that height difference is SOMETHING else.

Speaking of Mikkii, I’d like to challenge everyone who records and edits anything for the rest of her time in Takarazuka to actually put the camera on her for more than .9 seconds, because she is ON TO SOMETHING REAL. Tenju Mitsuki is always on. Whether or not you particularly care for what she’s doing, everything she does is done with 100% follow through and intention, she has a target, she isn’t doing anything superfluous or pointless with her body. She’s SHARP. Tenju Mitsuki is a fantastic performer and I really want to see more of it.

Speaking of fantastic performers, shoutouts to Coto (sorry, duh), Daimon, and Maaya for being magnetic in the same 100% followthrough, target, intention way. What incredible performers.

Yuki and Tamakichi sang OKLAHOMA and while I thought I knew what heartbreak felt like, it turns out I didn’t until I realized that we won’t ever get Tamakichi/Yuki Oklahoma.

Daimon and Sakura’s Climb Every Mountain was NICE.

I love these Top Musumeyaku Very Much. It’s almost dumb to say but God they just all bring such different things and personalities and voices to the table.

Welcome to Top, Misono Sakura. It’s good to see you. <3

Senna Ayase has Got It. She rocks. She has a lot of power and she led her musumeyaku in something really sassy and nice and I just want to say that man, I hope she loves her post-Takarazuka life.

I want to compliment Maitii on everything and mourn the fact that she isn’t leading everything, honestly.

There was a kind of long but not too long In Memoriam Section featuring the Top Musumeyaku all speaking for a few seconds and then mostly senka members + Kai + Akira with vocal solos all in white.

I never want to see another musumeyaku’s dress dragging on the ground. Someone almost Ate It when her dress got caught on something at the edge of the stage. Please. Keep our musumeyaku upright. Hemming things isn’t that hard.

Wow, Tsukigumi is fun. I also literally can not fathom HOW Baddy was THIS YEAR. As a whole they just have a really fun, kinda off-the-cuff energy that I find very endearing.

Shimon led Chaos Paradise, which, if you’re me, was one of the most satisfying things in the world.

Tamakichi is so beautifully EARNEST in a way that really suits all the golden age musicals she’s been getting. Maybe we CAN cross our fingers for Oklahoma...

From now on I’m formally requiring 8-10 business days to prepare for hearing Inochi from Gaisenmon because I didn’t walk into Hey! Say! Show Up! expecting to get chills and feel the weight of the Human Condition on my shoulders.

Shoutout to Yukigumi for replacing the ‘Nya!!’ at the end of Gato Bonito! with ...whatever sound they were approximating to imitate a wild boar. Happy New Year, everyone!

Irodori Michiru is just really cute and I love looking at her.

Thank you Kai for your golden hair and 16 Year Strong insistence on being .3 seconds behind on choreography because you prefer being ~languid~ to being ~sharp~ because you sure were easy to find.

No amount of exclamation points, keysmashing, or attempts to describe it can make you understand how I felt when the music to Jump! from Oceans 11 started up, or when RUSTY was played by Kai. That was a dream come true. Nothing less.

On that note, KAI SANG RAIMEI TOO, so I feel like God really Was looking out for Her Fans this Takaspecial. Thanks, God.

Everyone’s medley started out with the Top Star singing something earnest or Powerful or Big, but our very own Kurenai Yuzuru elected to open up with SPECIFICALLY the doki doki waku waku bit from Another World. The audience loved it. I loved it. I love Beni and I love Hoshigumi and I love that they included Arigataya, Nanmaida from Another World also and I love that Kai was hopping around as Kiroku again with the biggest smile on her face and I love that we got to hear Coto’s PIPES and I love that the audience was clapping for Killer Rouge and I love Killer Rouge and I love the ENERGY THAT troupe has.

Seo Yuria. Seooooo. Seooocchi. Get that fear out of your eyes, sweet thing. You have such a SMILE when you let yourself and your voice is THERE and you’re about to step into some big big shoes. Let yourself have this.

Rei and Saki are both coming into their own vibes! I’m excited to see where they go from here.

Shoutout to Shidou Ryuu for getting WAY more screentime than intended because she was planted half a foot to the right and directly behind Tom at pretty much all times. Good to see you, Shidou!

The best thing about seeing people from different troupes performing together in any number is like....no one is quite WITH EACH OTHER. Like MAYBE your weird idiosyncrasies fit in well with your troupe, but they sure don’t fit with the weird stuff your neighbor is doing. It’s charming and it’s sweet and I LOVE seeing it.

I didn’t think I’d cry either but tears DID spring to my eyes when Kai bowed.

I would like to formally petition Takarazuka Forever to FOLLOW Sumire no Hana in encores because Sumire no Hana is kinda a downer and Takarazuka Forever is an upper but that’s personal preference.

They wished the audience Merry Christmas and Happy New Year in ENGLISH which felt like an extra treat.

I didn’t mention every single actress in this (I’m sorry if I missed yours!! It’s so hard to remember everything and watch everyone when there are such weird combinations of actresses on the stage etc.), but God, I can honestly and truly say that to me, they all shone. Everyone is so different and everyone is working so hard. Every person who had a solo did it with everything they had, and it was beautiful to say. While watching Saki and Tamakichi, the thought came to me that entertainers- people who choose to use their lives to make other people happy- are just so special. These women are all such hard working performers and dedicated individuals and the life they put into giving us this thing is incredible. I feel so lucky to even be able to say that I do what they do. Not with HALF the skill or talent but this was one of those shows that made me think. Oh. We are so lucky to do this. The world is so lucky to have this art form. Musical theatre really is the most wonderful thing in the world, to me.

If more comes to me later, I’ll add it after the cut, but this is already 80 pages long and I’ve exhausted my phone notes. If you read this far, thanks and I’m impressed! I’m HAPPY to tell you more specifics about things if you want to ask, I can try to scrape my brain for whatever’s in there.

Thanks for a beautiful 2018 in Takarazuka, everyone. Happy New Year! May 2019 bring us beautiful things we could never have expected!

#takarazuka #tca special 2018

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thefreshfinds · 5 years

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Dre Skuffs - Shade Theory

An album that gives back to the world & then some, Dre Skuff’s 18 tracked album Shade Theory (prod by Pawcuts & more) shows all sides of who he is as an individual in one. Each track alone looks beneath the surface.

Cornered in by a vision, Dre is able to scope out his truth. Their truth. “This project is for the world to hear all shades of me.” Dre adds “I’m not just calm or on my thugged out sh*t or a ladies man & that’s the greatest part about it. I had no difficulty even making this because it’s just so easy to be yourself. Shade Theory was moved by a feeling”

One moment the disciple could be fighting for what’s right for the people (Can’t Stop), showing a more vulnerable side (Sippin’ Yak) or even letting the suckers know that he not the one to be pushed! (Handouts & Fed Up). Yet Dre’s star-power remains on a thou’ (Hot & Top Ace Intro).

He’s as ill as it gets & creates a different illustration through the means of storytelling & complexed flows.

THE BREAK-DOWN

1. Top Ace Intro: Wow! What a way to make an entrance! Followed by the jingle of gold coins, the elevating pattern from the beat leaves room for Dre Skuffs make his triumph. Announcing himself as an emcee whose “rap style is impeccable” over a hallow chant in the background, he goes in about how he’s never going to stop(even if life throws some obstacles in his way.) While others may do it for clout, Dre does it simply because it’s something he’s good at & destined for.

2. Can’t Stop ft Jah Vision: Easing in with talks of struggle & making a change for the nation, this beat screams POWER as Dre allows that same laid back demeanor he carries to wrap into his verses. At most this song speaks about issues that need more awareness (like led in water fountains or even overpriced education) that people aren’t woke to. Through it all, his people remain strong so it doesn’t matter what the world tries to throw their way. To add an moving effect is Jah Vision’s war-ready vocal arrangement which subconsciously makes the people feel like they can get through anything.

3. Intelligent Thug: In pursuit of an glimmered blare of trumpets, Dre uses his eloquent ways to speak about women who want a man who’s gully & book smart. Although Dre has been through the wringer, he doesn’t allow it to determine where life takes him. He’s a knowledgeable being with a good head on his shoulders but in this song it seems like he’s mimicking the girls of this generation who just want a “bad boy.”

4. Hot ft Big Rod: An more upbeat track that aims some flexecution at his haters, Dre pulls out a “I win you lose” attitude in his verses. He’s coming for his spot & is damn if he lets anyone take it!

5. Phone Call 1 + 15. Phone Call 2: These two are basically conversation’s Dre has with another. Phone Call 2 is a conversation with a loved one about his recent tour & how he’s been living it up! (He also doesn’t forget to show her love for all she does. I mean.. this mysterious woman has been showing love since day one so it’s only right.) But in Phone Call 1 it surfaced around the Ghostface Killa & 50 Cent beef. *The speech is slowed down for effect*

6. Handouts ft. N-Omega: Bouncing through your temple with that West Coast vibe, Dre & N-Omega spit about the sleazeballs who just want to benefit off of their hard work. Frankly, they’re just fed up & advice whoever thinks to try it to just not. (Just invest in yourself. They’re not your ticket out of Bumsville.)

7. The Unknowing ft Courtney Danger: “In life no one knows what shall unfold.” This very line is best sung smoothly by Courtney Danger in this track & it’s true. Though someone’s actions may appear vile, there could be a better reasoning as to why it is done. Luckily Dre Skuffs gets it & so he tells a number of stories revolving around it over a soulful production. This track just oozes into your listening stream! You can’t help but to leave it on repeat.

8. Gimee My Cash ft Khalil Jibran: Most likely to make you two-step, Dre Skuffs is all about his business in this track! (& yes he wants to be PAID. IN. FULL.) It could all be so simple yet people want to make it difficult by not giving credit when it’s due but Dre & Khalil are here to set them straight. The versatility from these two emcees is apparent as the breakdown from the track builds up in time for them to both speak their piece.

9. Insane-Mesmerized ft. Johanny: A track that’s sure to woo the ladies, Dre Skuff puts on his charm & speaks of a lady who he attracts to like a magnet (but he seems to be caught up in his ways). In the bridge of 3:13 Johanny speaks in the woman’s perspective, singing ever so softly about how she feels the same. (Alexa cue Dangerously in Love by Beyonce’). As a sweet touch, the beat makes sure to center on a lightly pressed snare drum & trickled, lightly pressed piano chords, slowing down in time for Johanna’s piece. (Kind of how Drake does in some tracks off his latest album: More Life)

10. Mile Away ft Sunnie: Jazzy yet soulful (thanks to Sunnie’s powerful range), this track speaks about the ones who thought they blindsided Dre Skuffs but boy were they wrong! Stronger than ever, Dre Skuffs comes in empowered & ready for any other obstacles headed his way.

11. Voice Drop ft. Big Rod & Liftoff: It’s survival of the fittest & so far, these three have killed off the rest. Big Rod, Liftoff & Dre go 0 to 100 & say they’ll continue to reign as number ones.

12. Fed Up: Dropping in with a dauntful beat to scare away those who try to test him, Dre Skuffs is fed up with these n*ggas. In this track he’s basically in full savage mode. He doesn’t care about these groupies (male or female) phonies, media platforms or DJ’s. At the end of the day Dre knows who really rides for him & is willing to show THOSE people love. For those plotting: He wants the smoke. All of it.

13. Sippin Yak ft Maxx Gilliam: We all need distractions to get away from the pain (whether good or bad) it just comes easy to us. This track is significantly relatable because we’ve all been there & it specifically focuses on the pain he endured while his cousin is suffering through an illness.) Whether it’s losing a loved one or just a love.. the pain can just be unbearable. Maxx Gilliam’s sweet, hallow singing pattern also makes you feel like things will indeed be ok.

14. Wanna Tell You: Seductive in its own manner, the production that Dre Skuffs chose for this track leaves a perfect imprint for his emotionally captivating rhymes. Followed by some slick Spanish murmurs & silhouetted piano chords, the multi dexterous Dre Skuffs places himself in the tale as a knuckleheaded young bull who’s just “DTF” with a beautiacious woman. As a result, Dre leaves room for milennials to relate & ponder on. This track shows others that their are consequences to every action we make so it’s best to consider all of the outcomes.

16. Real With Me ft Sobmar: Bringing back that 90’s soulful feel Dre speaks about the woman he looks for, one that’s honest, into him & someone he can just kick it with. That’s really all he ask for. Plain & simple. In pursuit is Sobmar’s mellow singing voice.

17. Be Free ft. Trish Jane: Smooth at it’s finest with the same trickled piano chords, the light hitting drum helps to tell an intriguing tale about a man who’d do anything for his family if it means to keep them happy “who’s lost in the sauce forreal”. Little does he know it’ll have the worst outcome. It just goes to show you that humans will do anything for materialistic things & it’s sad. I especially love Trish Jane’s risen singing pattern because it helps to deliver the main message.

18. The Charge Up: The instruments are HEARD in this last track. From the cymbals to the low guitar riffs, they bring the track to life. Dre Skuff is really trying to tell the TRUTH to everyone but sometimes it’s taken as being “boring” or “corny”. Advising others to not give into the evils of the world, he just wants his people to spread the love & fight for justice.

In a word, Shade Theory is timeless. It’s going to affect the world in a positive way. Each track is different & gives you topics to ponder on. “The sound is just us [NJ artist].” (But that can’t be said about every artist. Dre’s manager even thought Fetty Wap was from the South!)

Shade Theory is full of realizations, words of encouragement & shows that Dre’s drive is apparent. “You can break me down in 20 ways, but Shade Theory..that’s me.”

By: Natalee Gilbert

Shade Theory **Available on all platforms**

https://soundcloud.com/dreskuffs/sets/shade-theory

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imsobrooklyn-archived-sameurl · 5 years

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TAGGED BY: found & stolen. TAGGING: @saturnrang, @falsedking, @valinta + whoever come across this.

► GENERAL.

HEIGHT: 5′8 — previously 5′6. After being bitten by the genetically-altered “42″ Spider, his stature is elongated by two inches. WEIGHT: 160 lbs — Miles is an ectomorph; it’s mostly maintained because of his obligatory participations in gym classes, playing basketball with the neighborhood every now and again after school, and the rare times he can sneak off for urban exploration or play around with his uncle’s punching bag. He doesn’t exactly have the greastest diet plan. ETHNICITY: African-American && Afro-Puerto Rican. OCCUPATION: Freelance photographer, explorer, artist, F.E.A.S.T. (Food, Emergency, Aid, Shelter, and Training) volunteer, Brooklyn Vision student, convenience store cashier, Dream Defender, and vigilante. GENDER: Cis-male. He/him. ROMANTIC AND SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Heterosexual & Demiromantic. MBTI: ENFP- the champion. Miles know how to relax, and he is perfectly capable of switching from a passionate, driven idealist in the workplace to that imaginative and enthusiastic free spirit on the dance floor, often with a suddenness that can surprise even his closest friends. Being in the mix also gives him a chance to connect emotionally with others, giving him cherished insight into what motivates his friends and colleagues. He believe that everyone should take the time to recognize and express their feelings, and their empathy and sociability make that a natural conversation topic.

Few personality types are as creative and charismatic as ENFPs. Their enthusiasm and vivid imagination allow ENFPs to overcome many challenging obstacles, more often than not brightening the lives of those around them. ENFPs’ creativity is invaluable in many areas, including their own personal growth.

► SPECIFICS.

FAVOURITE FOOD: Pasteles, Empanada, Chicharon de pollo, Pop-Tarts, Platanos, Chopped Cheese, Nathan’s Famous’ hotdogs, Aunt Butchie’s Desserts (chocolate mousse preferably), Chinese food, and Ray’s Pizza. FAVOURITE DRINK: He enjoys his uncle’s Whey protein drinks, but you’ll mostly see him drinking sodas, Gatorade, O.J., and water. FAVOURITE HOBBY: Vandal by nature, Miles loves snagging Priority Mail and Hello, My Name Is stickers to practice his art and toss his mark up wherever and whenever he can. Other than that, he plays mental gymnastics for fun when it comes to math problems. If he’s not doing that, then he’s fooling around with programs like Audacity, Sony Vegas, or FL Studio.

But the activity he feels most at peace at is when he’s isolated in his room or hanging around a building as Spiderman, writing in his journal. FAVOURITE SCENT: Vanilla, Sandalwood, Shea Moisture Manuka and Yogurt. FAVOURITE PERSON: Ganke. Miles never had a brother (a reality he yearned his parents make happen), but Ganke gives him an idea as to how it would be if he did have a biological brother.

► TEN FACTS.

Miles is an only child. “Born” on December 14th, 2003.

He’s Catholic.

Adaptability comes as second nature to Miles. In two days, he managed to survive his near-death experiences as he tangled with some of the best of the original Spiderman’s villains.

Miles use to cry Martin Luther King Day because the television and radio would play clips of his speeches, and he thought sounded like a ghost.

Until he reached the age of ten, Miles had irritable bowel syndrome and would crap his pants every so often.

He owns an Atari, Sega, and Nintendo console passed down to him from his father.

One of his favorite shows is American Ninja Warrior.

Calculus is one of his favorite subjects. Numbers, symbols, and alphabets is a challenge that he can never tire from.

There’s an unshakable habit he has and that’s speaking his thoughts out loud, much to his chagrin.

His facial features mostly resemble his father and his uncle, which is can be considered a blessing and a curse, depending on the environment he’s in. Because the Davis brothers dark past had them as hustlers, stick-up kids, and graffiti artists, and their lives would take a drastic turn in where one becomes a cop and the other went on to become a boxer, the name Davis is enough to put a sour taste on the tongues of certain circles. It’s a fleeting love-hate thing he has for it.

► FIVE THINGS HE LIKES.

VIDEO GAMES — Jefferson was never comfortable with sharing his questionable deeds on the streets with his son, but he was more than excited to share his childhood glory with him. He couldn’t wait until Miles was old enough to have a controller in his hand. Miles is “heir” to a collection of dated collection. He likes modern consoles too, as he does own both a XBOX ONE and PLAYSTATION 4, but he prides in being a ‘young old soul’. GRAFFITI — It just kind of happened? He wasn’t messing with actual spraypaint because he’s too young to cop them from Home Depot, so he stuck to just stacking up on stickers and using that until he’s legally able to buy his own. HIP-HOP — That’s New York. Hip-Hop was born there. Miles passionately embraces the main four elements that represents its culture: Emceeing, DJING, Graffiti Art, Breakdancing and integrates the other five in how he moves. Street fashion, language, entrepanuership, knowldge, beatboxing, Hip-Hop is something he lives. BOXING — We can thank Aaron for his interest in that. Aside from the man’s criminal resume, Aaron graduated from neighborhood bruiser to professional boxer. His had a impeccable record before he hung up his gloves, but the passion he had for the sport stayed with him and any chance he got with his newphew, it would show when he would spit game on the greats like Mohammad Ali, Joe Fraizer, Dixie Kid, Jack Dempsey, Tyson, and others and teach him a few of his old moves. CLEANING SNEAKERS — It’s nothing deep. You watch Paid in Full a couple of times and add your love for that movie to your natural love of keeping your gear fresh and you get a sneakerhead that’s addicted to keeping his kicks mean and pristine.

► FIVE THINGS HE DISLIKES.

PEER PRESSURE — His hood didn’t have too many stars. There were plenty of potential there, but due to unfortunate circumstances, they make it out, but Miles—everybody regards him as the gold representation. Because of his upbringings, Miles is sort of hood royalty in a positive sense. On one hand, he enjoys it appreciation, but on the other hand, he hates it because his father doesn’t make it easy on him at all. He doesn’t judge his father for doing what he had to do in the streets to survive, but he hates his father for shoving his demons down his throat. Becoming Spiderman was nothing to leap for him to leap excitedly over either. Being stressed with being the “good son”, the “golden boy” of his neighborhood, and acing studies was enough as is. Since Peter Parker and his uncle’s murder, he felt tremendous guilt over not being able to help, and with his abilities, he feels strong on his moral obligation to do what he can to be New York’s protector. It’s not the easiest weight for a teenager to carry. E X P E C T A T I O N S! eff dem! UNDERESTIMATED — In school, he dealt with a teacher that regarded him and kids like him as trash that would never be able to amount to anything. The Spider-gang didn’t think he had what it takes, making him feel as if he was a burden and incapable of being strong enough to keep his promise to his universe’s Peter Parker. He doesn’t do well with people acting like he can’t do anything. TALES FROM THE HOOD — Doesn’t particularly care to hear about criminal exploits, especially the ones his family participated in. Some kids would love to hear about how hard their peers went in the street—Miles isn’t one of them. If anything, he wishes he was oblivious to it and didn’t have to hear one related word to it. That’s one thing he’s thankful for when it comes to his dad and Aaron. They never bragged or felt inclined to share gorey details and for good reason. Miles know they and everyone else want better for him. LYING — His mama raised him to be a honest boy. His pops raised him to be a man of principle. His uncle instilled street honor in him. Other than that? Miles naturally hates lying. It doesn’t make him feel good and can actually make him a serious nervous wreck if it gets to be too much for him. FIGHTING — Even though he was taught self-defense and enjoyed his boxing lessons, Miles avoided conflict as much as he could. He preferred to just be that cool guy that can make friends with the whole world and keep it pushing. He accepts that it’s unavoidable as a superhero, but that doesn’t stop him from trying to come to a peaceful resolve before the situation gets nasty.

► WORDS / PHRASES THAT ANNOY HIM.

CLASSISM — I know it’s not a word/phrase, so I’ll just say toxic braggadocio statements. When it comes to skin color, religion, abilities (supernatural or mortal), lienage, whatever—Miles views them all as people that share the same oxygen and should treat each other like they’re aware of that. Being made to feel like a sub-human aggravates him more than he cares to admit (he once broke his classroom desk because of his teacher constant poking at the african diaspora).

► PERSONALITY TYPES HE PREFERS.

FREE SPIRITS — Chilled souls; people that are down to do whatever they please (in a healthy, non-violent way), and exudes positive energy. It’s nice to be around individuals that understands what it means to have fun without restrictions and not people that live by some book like his father. You can miss him with those that feels like they have to be tight asses all the time.

► PERSONALITY TYPES HE AVOIDS.

GOD COMPLEX — Kingpins/drug lords/gang leaders/criminal upstarts, just people that play God in the streets, dictating who lives and dies, just because they have a gun and have a little bit of power. There’s not a doubt in his mind that there will be elements in the underworld that’s going to try to seduce him to the life. It’s a mission of his to not fall into the same darkness that stained the Davis name. You will never see Miles becoming close friends with a thug or a wannabee. He’ll try to steer them clear of it and be a moral compass of course, but having that as a part of his inner circle is a big no.

#GENUINE DIME—I OPENED MY MIND / HEADCANONS #(I may come back and edit this in the future)#queue

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the-canary · 6 years

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What If? - S.R

Summary: In which Steve Rogers finally takes a chance of his own. (Reader/Steve Rogers)

Word Count: 1.5K

Prompt: Delight

Masterlist

A/N: This is for @redgillan‘s birthday challenge. This is the first time I have written for Steve and I got a little too excited and ran with the idea i got in my head. Just to step up a timeline, first part takes place after the first Avengers and the second part some time before Winter Soldier.

Please enjoy and feedback is always welcomed.

After the Battle of the New York, Steve Rogers is allowed a small respite as the Avengers Tower is finished being built and the rest of the city tries to find itself after all the destruction. Steve tries his hardest to find his own place within this new version of his home, of what he should be in this era and he spends a lot of time people watching – seeing others trying to help one another, strangers helping strangers find a place to stay or missing loved ones. It gives him a sense of hope for a society that seems so closed off to him. And through the following months, Steve finds himself in a small cafe in Manhattan, because it’s closer to the Tower and he really can’t find a good coffee place in Brooklyn without being hassled.

Blue eyes look around to watch all the people that pass by through the mid-morning rush, but one catches his attention most off all. A young woman that often sits in the back either writing on papers or hiding behind huge glasses and a thick book. However, she always pauses and talks to the older people that seem to know her so well, she smiles and laughs behind a cup of coffee – and Steve Rogers draws her from time to time. He's captivated.

“You should talk to her sometime, kid,” Stan, the owner of the shop, tells him drawing Steve out of glancing at you from the countertop seat he frequents, “Don’t wanna miss ya chance.”

It takes him two weeks to get the courage to talk to her.

You're reading something by a Jon Meacham and downing your last coffee, as he stands next to the empty seat across from yours.

“H-Hi,” he tries not to let his voice shake, as you look up and your eyes grow at the sight of him, though not exactly for all the reasons he is used to, “Can I sit here?”

“S-Sure,” you voice is equally as shaky as he does,”To what do I owe the pleasure today?”

You smile and put down your book before taking another sip of coffee. It’s small talk at first as you try to ignore who Steve Rogers actually is, who he has been to you your whole life, but as you learn a little more about him on a personal level it’s all water under the bridge. You talk about the book you’re reading and what you do for a living – a professor in a certain prestigious university.

“So, what’s your field of expertise?” he eventually asks, and you feel your cheeks suddenly burning up.

“Ummm…well you,” you cough out in embarrassment, as he looks out you in utter confusion. Oh, it could only go downhill from here, “Well, specifically the use of Captain America imagery and propaganda post World War II and during the Red Scare.”

“I see,” is all he can say, as you sweep a hand over your messy hair due to your anxiety overwhelming everything else in that moment, because only you could mess up meeting Steve Rogers after months of seeing him from afar, because in all the months of stealing glance behind books and graded papers – you saw that he wasn’t self-righteous and honorable Captain America but sweet and kind of shy man that enjoyed his coffee with two sugars and lots of cream, that sometimes liked sitting next to a window to draw those huge skyscrapers or a person passing by.

Oh god, only you could fuck this up, and you still were. If only someone could stop you from opening your big mouth.

“You should have seen it…Mr. Stark hated McCarthy using your image,” you babble on due to nerves, as Steve covers his mouth to hide his smile, though you take it as something else,”Ran all the newspapers with any rumor he could find out about ‘im.”

Steve shakes his head, something like that clearly reminding him of the flamboyant scientist and millionaire he once knew, but it also reminded him of the cruel fact that he missed so much. His face is clean of any expression as you begin to put two and two together (and try to stop yourself from saying anything worse), but your phone does the job as it rings. You surprised to hear the Dean of the Political Science Department yelling congratulations and for a moment Steve smiles at your bright eyes and excited hand movements.

“Henry, you’re joking, seriously!” you cradle the phone between your shoulder and ear and begin to gather all your papers and books, clearly not trying to glance at the specimen of a man across from you in the obvious disappointment of how your talk went – at least in your opinion, “I’ll be there before my afternoon classes…Ok, ok, as soon as possible.”

“Big news?” he questions with a slight smile, as you nod enthusiastically.

“I got awarded something huge,” your eyes widen, while talking and he can’t help but get caught in your bright facial expressions,”but, I really have to go now.”

“That’s completely fine,” Steve smiles catching some your eagerness,” and congratulations.”

“It was great meeting you. Maybe–” we could hang out again sometime, but you pause and stop from embarrassing yourself any further. He doesn’t seem to catch what you were going to say, as you wave goodbye.

He watches you run out the door without another world, promising himself that he’ll turn this awkward situation around. Steve Rogers waits two weeks and there’s no sight of you, on the third he asks Stan if anything had happened to you. Something better, he said proudly like a doting grandfather. You had gone to Washington D.C on a fellowship.

Steve Rogers had missed his chance again.

It’s another two years and Steve Rogers learns more – he slowly learns to stop living in the past, to trust in the small family he has formed. However, he still finds himself slipping to the what-ifs off it all, particularly more recent ones. Maybe, that’s why he isn’t feeling the opening gala of the Museum of the City of New York’s Captain America Exhibit – all of his accomplishments and failures in one place, though he still kept the professional smile along with the tailored-made suit Tony had made for the occasion. He doesn’t slip once, especially when talking to people and even when giving his speech – all everyone ever wanted was the hero, and he played it well. Playing it safe, he stands away from the stage after his moment, his thoughts are everywhere until the presenter starts thanking all the curators and historical professors that helped make the exhibit possible and then he hears a familiar voice.

“It is thanks to her diligent effort that we added an extra wing on Captain America’s influence after WWII,” the emcee claps, as you smile in a blue dress and stylish pair of black glasses.

You’re glowing at all your hard work and Steve smiles a little bit more than before, but he knows he can’t let this chance slip away. You blush and look away and Steve in all his single-minded stubbornness knows he needs to talk to you again. However, that's easier said and done, as both of you are pushed back and forth to be put on display but due to different reasons. It isn’t until well into the night that you are both pushed onto the empty dance floor – him due to Tony and you because of your co-workers. Steve is standing in the middle of all those dimming lights, and you’re completely breathless.

“Captain Rogers,” you greet him, as he grabs you by the waist as the old song begins to play.

“Steve is just fine,” he murmurs softly, as you smile while slowly swaying to the song. The rest of the room is completely forgotten and neither of you say anything for awhile. You hum lightly, as he chuckles while rubbing small circles on the back of your dress. But, just like before you had to open your big mouth.

“Isn’t it weird?” you ask as blue eyes turn to meet your own.

“What exactly?” he smiles, knowing where you are going with this train of thought already.

“I mean, I know everything about you from an academic standpoint,” you explain in confusion, which causes him to laugh. It’s then that Steve decides to make a what-if possible.

“Then, how about from a personal one?” he asks in a pleading, hushed tone and your eyes widen like saucers.

“W-What?”

“It’s taken me a long time to adjust,” he pauses as he swings you away and back from him. A light blush on your face as he pulls you closer than before, “But, in all this time, I still miss that little shop back in Manhattan, I missed what could have been and I’m tired of the what-ifs.”

“What if?” you keep questioning, as he moves his hand from yours to cradle your cheek.

“…What if I had talked faster? What if I had asked for her number?” he whispers eagerly as his forehead touches yours, “What if I asked to kiss her right now?”

“I’m sure she wouldn’t mind,” you pause and let out as an afterthought, “after a couple of dates.”

“You think she’s free Friday night?”

“Definitely.”

Steve lets out a hearty laugh and feels a truly warm and delightful feeling at grasping something for himself for once. It gets a little better when you decide to steal a quick peck before the night is over.

#stevesemotionalbirthday #steve rogers x reader #steve x reader #series: short stories #fabiola trying to write

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crimethinc · 6 years

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Perspectives on the August 12 Anti-Fascist Mobilization in DC: Two Interviews with Organizers

On August 12, Charlottesville fascist Jason Kessler attempted to hold the sequel to last year’s “Unite the Right” rally in Washington, DC. It did not go well for him. In the end, 2000 police struggled to protect two dozen fascists from thousands of anti-fascists and other foes of tyranny. To get some perspective on these events, we spoke with David Thurston—arts director for No Justice No Pride, a member of the steering committee of the DMV’s Movement for Black Lives, and a core organizer with Resist This—and also with an anonymous anarchist involved in organizing the anti-fascist bloc, among other aspects of the mobilization. The interview follows our comments below.

The US government spent $2.6 million to force the fascist rally upon the people of Washington, DC. Let’s do the math: that’s over $100,000 per fascist for a rally that lasted at hour at most. Would the US spend anything like that to protect a rally organized by any other sector of the population? On the contrary, when anarchists and other advocates of liberation organize public events, the government usually invests millions of dollars in repressing us, even illegally. This shows what a farce the “free speech” defense of fascist recruiting drives is—this is not an abstract question of rights, but a concrete matter of the US government asymmetrically investing resources in promoting the spread of fascism.

To put a number on it, then, the kind of “free speech” that enabled Kessler and his like to recruit someone to murder Heather Heyer is worth $100,000 per hour per fascist to the US government. That’s your tax dollars at work.

We were especially inspired by the fierceness with which the black population of DC turned out to face down the police and fascists on August 12. We have some questions about whether it makes sense for anarchists to act separately in a distinct anti-fascist contingent when other sectors of the population are mobilizing so courageously and assertively. It might be more effective for some anarchists to seek to connect with other rebels on the street, in order to bring about an interchange of tactics and ideas.

We’ve seen some alarmist reporting on the clashes, such as the following video. Permit us to repeat that what is happening here is that the US government is forcibly extorting money from its population which is then used to fund the violent imposition of fascist rallies on communities that only stand to suffer from the expansion of fascist movements. It should be no surprise that people defend themselves from police violence to this end.

One more topic bears mention: a few reactionary media outlets have taken this opportunity to accuse anti-fascists of being “violent” towards journalists for discouraging them from filming. This is the same thing they did last year two weeks after the violence in Charlottesville, when the editors of various corporate media publications attempted to create a false equivalency between fascists recruiting to carry out murder and genocide and anti-fascists mobilizing in self-defense.

In a time when fascists go through video footage identifying anti-fascists in order to intimidate and terrorize them and far-right Republican Congressmen are attempting to aid and abet them via new legislation, it should not come as a surprise to anyone that anti-fascists discourage people from filming them without permission. If these journalists are really concerned about this issue, they should prioritize helping to create a world in which no one needs to fear being documented, identified, and attacked by fascists or police just for attempting to defend their communities from fascist activity. Instead, many journalists have prioritized assisting fascists like Kessler in getting his message out.

Read on for the interviews. For one perspective on the history of anti-fascism in DC, read this.

Two Organizers on the August 12 Mobilization

What were your goals going into August 12? What did you think a best case scenario would be for the day?

David Thurston: For the past month, I’ve been working as the arts organizer for the mobilization. My first job was to make sure the rally in Freedom Plaza and the three direct action contingents got the brilliant, vibrant, colorful, and radical banners that the 411 Collective crafted. I also co-emceed the rally with Aiyi’anah Ford of the Future Foundation—we met through the organizing around the National Equality March in 2009. I wanted to see the Nazis vastly outnumbered and I wanted to see DC and DMV activists organize around a synergy and diversity of tactics—allowing us to welcome people into the movement who may never have heard of anarchist theory, but who over time could be introduced to our praxis of non-hierarchical, anti-sectarian, and revolutionary politics.

Another anarchist organizer: I wanted to make Nazis too afraid to come to DC. I also wanted to block their march. The former did not happen due to some last minute infighting, but the latter did happen.

Overall, I would say the action was an overwhelming success. Anarchists provided a great deal of labor in every aspect of the mobilization.

What did the anti-fascist demonstrators do well? What could have gone better?

David Thurston: We succeeded in overwhelmingly outnumbering our opposition, marginalizing their toxic politics, and putting forward an organizing model that can be advanced upon in the future. There were a number of internal challenges and conflicts that took shape in the lead-up to A12, but for the most part, the various components of our effort worked from a space of deep-rooted solidarity.

Another anarchist organizer: We overwhelmed neo-Nazis numerically, but because of some tactical and intelligence failures, we did not get the chance to actually confront them. But when you have thousands of people mobilizing and holding space, do you really need to escalate when the fascists are already too afraid to come out? The fact that the black bloc did not escalate when there was no reason to do so enabled us to hold space, stay disciplined until the end, and demonstrate an ability to show restraint when necessary in order to accomplish our goals of the movement.

On January 20, hundreds of people were mass-arrested during Trump’s inauguration and indiscriminately charged with eight or more felonies apiece. How did the legacy of the J20 case influence planning ahead of August 12? How do you think it influenced those who did not participate in the planning, but came to participate?

David Thurston: The fact that there were absolutely no convictions for J20 defendants was probably a big factor explaining why our city’s multitude of police forces were relatively restrained. My inkling is that someone above or in the orbit of Chief Newsham realized that it was not in the city’s interests for local police to play the role of being the extreme right’s de-facto storm troopers. That said, the massive deployment of state power was obscene. My guess is that a few million dollars of city money probably went into massive police overtime.

There may have been some folks who were afraid to come out, but my opinion is that that was probably because of what the neo-Nazis represent, and not because of anything that went down with J20.

Another anarchist organizer: We thought long and hard about how to avoid isolating ourselves from other social movements and argued against others trying to marginalize radicals. Considering that our movement had set up the tech support, website, security, trainings, and other essential aspects of the mobilization, it was impossible to isolate us on the sidelines where we would be easy targets for police violence.

Did it make sense to call for a distinct anti-fascist bloc, when so many people turned out to oppose the fascist rally with their own ways of being militant? Why or why not?

David Thurston: I think it was great to have an anti-fascist bloc that could plan direct action based on the worst-case scenario of a sizable far right turn-out. It was also good to have a space where the lessons of prior direct actions, especially J20, could be debated in depth.

In practice, there was a lot of synergy between the direct action contingents and the two permitted rallies, even though the permitted rallies gave voice to ideas more in line with traditional left liberal thinking.

Another anarchist organizer: I think the strategy of the bloc that day was to be able to

defend our communities

show a specifically radical presence that day.

A year after the Charlottesville “Unite the Right” rally, what do the events in DC tell us about the current political situation in the US?

David Thurston: I think last weekend’s events make it clear that the far right is in political, ideological, organizational, and interpersonal disarray. After the debacle of Jason Kessler’s pitiful mobilization, he went on a twitter rant attacking the rest of the self-proclaimed alt-right, calling them cowards for not mobilizing, and describing them as would-be Nazis living in their parents’ basements. While trying to get a permit in Charlottesville, Kessler managed to dox his own followers by turning over encrypted Signal threads, emails, and more to the state.

But we can’t rest on our success last weekend. While joining a proto-fascist organization remains a marginal idea for the millions of white people who voted for Trump in 2016, specific neo-Nazi proposals and talking points—especially around immigration, border security, and global imperialist hubris—remain appealing to wide swaths of low-income, working-class, and lower-middle-class white folk in our nation.

The radical left has immense potential to grow if we can shed the baggage of years of being fairly marginal to political debate. Anarchists need to organize creatively, finding space to work in alliance with left-leaning liberals, but also with socialist groupings with whom we have significant differences.

Another anarchist organizer: I think the rally on August 12 shows that militant anti-fascism works. A year ago, there were 500 fascists marching in the streets of Charlottesville. This year, less than 25 showed up because they were afraid. At least on the East Coast, anti-fascism has made sure the far right is demobilized.

So we’ve pushed back on-the-ground white nationalists… but as a movement, how do we use that strategy to disrupt other forms of organized white supremacy? How do we scale that strategy up to take on local right-wing lobbyists, local Republicans, police union officials, the Chamber of Commerce, DHS, and ICE officials?

The fascistic turn of the United States has been a 30-year process, and there are local people with local power who are marching us there. We need to figure out how to demobilize them.

Trump did not come to power because of the “alt right”—the alt right was able to use Trump to enter mainstream politics. Now our social movements need to identify the social leaders who pushed our local communities to the right and destabilize their political power.

The chief takeaway from this weekend is that even if we did not push the limits of the struggle, we did push a mobilization that was specifically anti-fascist. Anarchists and anti-fascists wrote the original call to action for the mobilization, provided experience, and pushed a strategy that allowed for numerous communities to come out and confront fascism.

The most challenging dynamic we had to navigate was engaging with liberals who wanted the day to look like “Boston” [the massive anti-fascist mobilization that took place there in response to a fascist rally a week after “Unite the Right” in Charlottesville] but did not emotionally prepare for the real possibility that the fascists could have mobilized hundreds.

Do you have any particularly instructive anecdotes to share from August 12?

David Thurston: My favorite moment was when the permitted march from Freedom Plaza entered the periphery of the “Rise Up Fight Back” contingent anchored by Black Lives Matter DC. They organized a block party near Lafayette to celebrate black joy and resistance, making the point that no neo-Nazi mobilization was going to intimidate them or cast a pall on the vision of black liberation that this movement was articulating.

On a personal note, I encountered a brother named Amir who introduced himself to me at the rally. I didn’t recognize him, but Amir told me that he was one of three young black men who tried to mug me near my neighborhood in DC. Amir apologized for his actions. I was so moved and thanked him, letting him know that I wish him the best, and never wanted anyone to go to jail for something as petty as trying to take $10 from me. To see him in the struggle for a radically different future on A12 made an impact on my psyche that I have a hard time adequately explaining.

We are living through perilous times. If we organize creatively and synergistically, radicals can lay the foundation for movements that could, within a decade or so, lead to revolutionary transformation in our country and around the world. But if we fail, the threat of global political, economic, and ecological cataclysm is immense. I have friends working hard to elect left-liberal to social democratic candidates for public office, and friends whose focus is on direct action and community based organizing. We need to build a radical tent broad enough for all of the above if the revolutionary potential of this moment is to be realized.

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