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meltwonu · 3 years

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✦ 👻 𝕸𝖔𝖓𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖍 SEASON 2 👻 ✦

↪ ✧ TEMPORARY ROMANCE ✧

this chapter pairing; werewolf!seungkwan x vampire!reader

genre&warnings; werewolf!au, vampire!au, dom!seungkwan, brat!reader, ‼️knotting‼️, dirty talk, degradation, sixty-nine, size kink, friendswithbenefits!au, impregnation/breeding kink, ‼️cumflation‼️.

notes; HAPPY THURSDAY!! 😈 If anyone remembers a long time ago on my blog, and by a long time I mean like, maybe over a year ago, I said I didn’t rly write werewolf/abo/wolf-hybrid au/fic bc I wasn’t too comfortable since I’d never really written anything for it… 😮‍💨 So I really busted ass on this so if it’s not up to par, please don’t let me know LMAO I was experimenting and trying to come out of my norms a little bit!! 😭💕I was really excited for this chapter honestly, hehe because of that 😗✌️ Enjoy ch 3 and I’ll see you in ch 4 🧙‍♀️ HEH have a good rest of your day! 💕🎃

word count; ~3000

chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - x - x - x - x - x - x - x - x - x - x

i want you to get stuck in my head;

i hear you over and over again.

don't make things so serious;

i don't mind, we'll be fine after this.

Seungkwan tells you again and again through the haze of alcohol and confidence - “I think you’d be so good at taking my knot.”

And you grimace in return, always - wondering why you even befriended him in the first place.

“Keep your weird alpha wolf things to yourself, Seungkwan.” You always reply back with a huff; breath shaky at the way he’d keep his eyes on you even after you reject him time and time again.

Tonight is no different as the two of you share a drink under the full moon; quietness taking over as the two of you sit and enjoy each others’ presence.

Except, it doesn’t last long as Seungkwan glances over to you - lips itching to say something when you put your bottle of liquor down.

“What if I liked you.”

“Huh?” You raise a brow at him, “How drunk are you, Seungkwan? That’s already skipping a lot of the weird drunk things you normally say after a few sips.”

He laughs back in return - eyes rolling before he takes a swig of his own bottle.

“Well, let me rephrase that, what if I wanted to fuck you really bad right now?”

You hum in response, taking in his words as your eyes flit over to the full moon looming over the two of you. “Is that some weird werewolf, full moon thing or just a Seungkwan thing?”

“I guess a little bit of both.”

Nodding, you set the bottle of liquor down next to yourself on the ground before laying down on the grass. “Wouldn’t we get in trouble for that?”

“What do you mean?”

“Jesus, Seungkwan, do you really think we’d get away with fucking each other and not getting each others’ scent on us? It’s probably bad enough that we hang out with each other - I get commented on how I always smell like wet dogs when I get back to the house.” Huffing, you cross your arms against your chest as you look at him leaning on his side next to you. “And don’t you… people, mate? Or something? Go get your rocks off with someone at your den or something.”

He sets his own bottle in the grass - uncaring as it tips over and spills into the dirt.

“Kinda hard to do that when I’m wondering if they’d be as good of a fuck as you.”

“Seungkwan… Are you okay? Be honest. You’re, like, skipping a lot of steps here.”

“Will you just admit you want to fuck me too? I could smell the way you were getting wet last time I told you how much I wanted to knot you.”

Oops.

You sit up as he leans in close to you - alcohol on his breath when his face is only centimetres from your own.

“Why didn’t you say anything about it last time then?” You whisper.

“Hah, and embarrass you like that? Anyone in a five mile radius could smell how badly you needed to be fucked.”

“Fuck you.”

“Well, on the contrary, that’s what I’m trying to do to you if you’d let me.”

You grit your teeth, “That’s not fair.”

“What isn’t fair?”

You push him until he’s laying on his back on the grass and you’re hovering above him; crimson eyes peering down at him as he stares up at you with an amused expression.

“Werewolf blood tastes disgusting so technically only you benefit from this, right? You get to do your weird sex, mating thing and I can’t even feed off of you.”

Seungkwan laughs loudly as you roll your eyes and lean away from him.

“That’s not true. You get a good fuck out of it, don’t you, baby? So let’s help each other out.”

You’d met Seungkwan around the time you’d just been turned - meek persona making him immediately want to protect you despite the major differences the two of you shared.

‘You’re new to this and you don’t have any friends so I’ll help you,’ he’d said - chest puffed out in confidence as you’d glued yourself to his side.

He’d been right too; the vampire that’d turned you had skipped town and left you with no guidance and no idea how to fend for yourself.

And despite the differences, Seungkwan had been extremely knowledgeable and did his best to help you catch your bearings before you’d met other vampires that had kindly taken you under their wings.

“W-wait, Seungkwan…”

In present day, everything felt new again as he laid underneath you - propped up on his elbows as you knelt between his legs. “I--Are we sure about this?”

“I am if you are. But if you think this’ll change too much between us, we can stop and I won’t be upset.” He smiles up at you and you bite the inside of your cheek.

You wanted him too - even if you’d never admit it out loud to anyone.

“Gotta say though, babe, you’re really cute when you’re shy. It reminds me of when we first met all those years ago~”

“Okay, now you’re being an asshole.” You sigh dramatically as you reach for the waistband of his jeans. “Next time, you’re eating me out until I say it’s enough, got it?”

“Anything for you, baby.”

You undo the button and zipper, gulping when he helps you push down his jeans and boxer briefs.

“Holy shit.”

Your eyes widen as you stare at his thick cock - mouth watering at how big he was. “I--oh…”

“Cat got your tongue?”

“S-Seungkwan what… What if it d-doesn’t f-fit…” Panic starts to nibble at you as his cock curves against his abdomen and you can’t take your eyes off of his size. “I--um… I don’t k-know what to say… Hah--haha…”

You can’t help but imagine how he’d feel inside of you; subtly trying to rub your thighs together to alleviate some of the arousal in your body when you remember that Seungkwan can smell you anyway.

“Oh, it’ll fit. Your cute ‘lil pussy can take me, I’m sure~”

You push all your shyness aside when Seungkwan offers to eat you out while you blow him - palms clammy as you get into position.

“Fuck, you’re so wet…” He mutters; hands on your ass as he spreads you open. “And you smell so fucking good…”

Seungkwan wastes no time as he slowly tugs you down towards his mouth - a shocked gasp leaving your lips when you feel his tongue gliding through your wet folds as he collects the wetness on the bed of his tongue.

“Mmh, o-okay…”

When you wrap a shy hand around his cock, you can’t help but whimper at the way you can’t even close your hand into a fist around his thick girth.

But you do you best to return the favor as you peek your tongue out - kitten licking the leaking tip as he groans against your wet skin. ��Ngh, S--Seungkwan…” Muttering, you drag your tongue from the tip to the base, teasing him as he does the same to you.

You feel yourself getting more and more comfortable as the minutes pass so you take a deep breath before you’re wrapping your lips around the head of his cock - slowly sinking your mouth down around his length as you whimper.

“Fuck, b-baby…”

Your mouth is tight and warm around him as he pauses his movements to savour the feeling of finally getting to feel you - hips threatening to thrust up into your mouth as you get used to his size.

“Shit, if your pussy is as tight as your mouth, I might not be able to last long, baby…”

He gulps and brings his fingers to your cunt; dragging them through your wetness as you mewl and shake your hips above him.

Seungkwan collects your wetness on his fingers before he places his index and middle finger at your entrance - slowly sinking them in at the same time as you moan around his cock.

“Mmmnh…”

The two of you work in tandem; Seungkwan scissoring and curling his digits inside of you as you take more and more of his cock into your mouth until the head of it taps your gag reflex.

He thrusts up into your mouth as you whine and try to fuck yourself on his fingers - pleasure building up quickly when he curves his fingers right into your sweet spot.

“Fuck, can I just fuck you already, baby? Your mouth feels so fuckin’ good around me and your pussy is so fucking wet… Your body is begging me to breed it.”

Oh.

A shiver rolls down your spine as you pause and take in his words - your walls clamping down onto his fingers as he grins and immediately pulls his sticky digits from inside of you.

“Is that what got you? Me saying how I wanted to breed your pussy?” Seungkwan laughs as he goes in to lick your wetness off of his fingers, “I’ve thought about it so much, baby~ You know, you might’ve always thought that I was joking about knotting you but… Ah, you’d look so pretty while my cock swells in your pretty ‘lil cunt and my cum fills you up so much that you’re swollen with it~”

You pull off of his cock - lips chapped as a thread of precum connects your trembling lips to the head of his cock.

“M-more… T-tell me m-more…”

Your voice is hoarse as Seungkwan starts to maneuver you into a different position; body buzzing with newfound energy when he situates you on your hands and knees with your ass in the air.

“Mm, you think my cock is too big for you right now but… Well, I guess you’ll just find out, right, baby? Tell me, have you ever imagined how I’d feel inside of you?”

“I--h-have you thought about m-me?”

“All the time~” He grins at your back before he slightly pushes you upper half down - his shirt spread out underneath you the only thing separating you from the dewy grass.

“I, a-ah, m-maybe thought about it, ngh, a--a few times after we had drinks but, mmh, t-that’s it…”

“Oh? So all those times that I told you about how you’d be so good at taking my knot, you actually were thinking about it?” Seungkwan teases.

“Fuh--fuck, yes! Yes I did, okay?! Now can you just f-fuck me, please?!” You dig your hands into the fabric underneath you - mildly embarrassed that he’d been right all along.

“As you wish~”

You feel the head of his cock teasing your entrance as you hold your breath knowing that he was a lot bigger than anyone else you’d ever been with.

“Relax or else I’ll end up hurting you, baby~ Your pussy already felt so tight around my fingers so I know it’s going to be a tight squeeze~”

Taking a deep breath, you try to do as he says as you relax all your muscles but the second he starts to sink his cock into you - you can’t help but tense up at the way he immediately stretches out your pussy.

“O-oh, g-god, Seungkwan… Fuck, Seungkwan!”

He goes slow and lets you adjust before he continues to inch in little by little - soothing your lower back as he whispers soft praises.

“You’re doing so well, baby~ I don’t think all of my cock is going to fit inside… Your pussy can barely take me, I bet you can feel it in your stomach, hmm?”

You nod feverishly as you slowly start to work your hips back; subtly trying to fuck yourself on his cock once you get comfrotable.

“Ngh, you’re so--so deep inside of me… Mmnh, hurry, S-Seungkwan I--I need to be bred so badly…”

He grits his teeth as he fights the animalistic side of him that wants to pin you down and use your pussy to his liking.

“Don’t try me, baby.”

“Ah, but---but I want it…” You mewl - giving into the delirium but half blaming it on the full moon still high above the two of you. “D-don’t you want me s-swollen with your p-pups…?”

Seungkwan gives you a few more minutes of adjusting to his size before he’s starting a hasty pace; his thick cock stretching you and making you cry out in pleasured moans as you soak his length with your wetness.

“Fuck, every time I had to fuck someone during my heat, all I could think of was you,” He growls, “I couldn’t even give any of them my knot because I knew it wasn’t you.”

His hips piston into your ass as your body rocks forward with his powerful thrusts - mouth permanently agape as drool spills from your lips and onto the measly fabric underneath you.

“S-shit, oh my god, Seungkwan…! Please--please, I wanna, ah, f-feel all of you…”

He peers down at where the two of you are connected; licking his lips as he pauses for a second before he sinks in his entire length up to the base.

“How’s it feel knowing your tiny ‘lil cunt is stretched around my cock, huh? Nobody is ever going to fill you up just like I can~ Hah, there’s probably not even enough room for my cum anymore, baby~”

You clamp down onto him and start to work your hips back - trying to get him to resume his pace as you pant.

“I--fuck, I don’t c-care… You’re not--not moving fast enough, Seungkwan!”

He slaps your ass once as you whimper and arch your back; toes curling when he does exactly what you wanted all along.

“Don’t get bratty with me or else I won’t,” He growls, “Can you imagine? I’d leave you here with your pretty ass up in the air, pussy stretched wide but feeling so empty without me fucking it like the good ‘lil cocksleeve you are. And then you’d have to go home all alone… Probably try to get off by yourself, huh?”

“O--okay, okay!” Muttering, you do your best to keep the snarky comments to yourself as Seungkwan slowly starts to hasten his pace.

“You’re soaking my cock so much though, baby… Every time I pull out of you, it gets wetter and wetter~

“Mmnh, you a-always talk about knotting me so--so fucking do it… I, a-ah, wanna feel it for m-myself…”

He licks his lips as he reaches a hand around your body - softly caressing your stomach as you bite your lip.

“You feel me pouding your cunt right here, don’t you? My cock is fucking you so deep and once I cum, you’re gonna be swollen with it - with my pups when I get you fucking pregnant.”

Seungkwan lets out a growl and starts to feel his cock throbbing after a few minutes and you feel yourself teetering on the edge of an orgasm yourself when he slides his hand from your stomach to your clit as you cry out.

“I want you to cum first though, baby… ‘Cause once I do, I know you’re gonna run that pretty ‘lil mouth of yours.” He retorts teasingly.

“F-fuck you… Ngh, fuck, p-play with my clit h-harder… I want it h-harder and f-faster…”

He pinches your clit as you mewl and arch your back; thighs trembling as your orgasm starts to crest.

“O-oh, Seungkwan…!”

It takes a few more quick snaps of his hips before the pleasure hits you hard - toes curling and walls fluttering around his cock as he bites his bottom lip and staves off his own pleasure to let you ride out your own.

“That’s right, baby… Get my cock nice ‘n wet before I give you want you really want and breed this filthy ‘lil cunt~”

His words sound fuzzy and faraway as you ride out your pleasure; Seungkwan still fucking you through it even when it starts to fizzle away.

Your body feels tired but you know you’re nowhere near done when you hear him growl - his grip on you tightening as he pinches your overly sensitive clit one last time before you feel his blunt fingernails digging into the skin of your waist.

“Now you’re gonna be a good ‘lil cocksleeve and take my knot.”

Whimpering, all you can do is nod back in return as you let Seungkwan chase his pleasure; already gasping when you start to feel it.

“O-oh my g-god…”

Your breath hitches when Seungkwan thrusts into you one final time before he starts to grind against your ass instead and you feel his cock throbbing before it starts to swell inside of you.

“Oh my--my god, oh my god…! Seungkwan!”

You all but tear into the fabric underneath you as he starts to unload his hot cum into your pussy - the sheer amount of it almost making you pass out as your body adjusts to accept it all.

“Fuh--fuck… you’re c-cumming so m-much inside of me…” You sob quietly; body buzzing as your stomach only swells more and more as Seungkwan continues to cum. “Ngh, a-ah, Seungkwan… H-holy s--shit, I--mmnh… I’m--I’m...”

The words die on your tongue as you try to catch your breath and adjust to the new feelings and sensations.

And Seungkwan grits his teeth as his cock continues to swell inside your cunt - stretching you to your limits as you do your best to take it all.

“Guess everyone is just gonna have to accept this relationship whether they like it or not, huh, baby? You’re gonna be smelling like me for weeks at this rate~ My cum is gonna be inside of this pretty ‘lil cunt for a while.”

He grins at your back as you whimper back in return - the thought of him actually impregnating you with his pups making you feel lightheaded.

“H-how m-much, ngh, m-more are you--you going to cum…?” Crying out, the urge to orgasm a second time making your teeth chatter as Seungkwan keeps your pussy plugged up with his knot.

“I’ve been saving it all up for you, baby~ I’m just going to keep cumming inside your pussy until I’m satisfied~” He chuckles darkly as he leans over your back; his warm chest meeting your back as you moan.

“Once I can tell you’re nice and bred and swollen with my pups, I’ll think about letting you cum again, okay? For now, let’s see how long you can last with my knot stretching you out just like this~”

#seungkwan smut #seventeen smut #svt smut #seungkwan scenarios #seungkwan imagines #seventeen imagines #svt imagines #seventeen scenarios #svt scenarios #seungkwan fic #seungkwan

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thran-duils · 3 years

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Learn Her Place

Title: Learn Her Place Summary: Fem!Omega!Reader x Alpha!Tony Stark x Alpha!Steve Rogers x Alpha!Bucky Barnes. The reader works for S.H.I.E.L.D. and is on suppressants. In this universe, we obviously are working with multiple Alphas being able to share an Omega. The reader has had sex before but it has been with Betas. She is very distracting to the Alphas and they’re tired of not being able to focus on their work, so they decide to make sure her suppressants no longer work and she is where they think she belongs. Without the suppressants, the reader succumbs to her hormones very quickly. Words: 4,894 Warnings (for the fic in entirety): Non-con, ABO dynamics, smut, breeding, brief mention of infidelity, multiple partners, angst. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK! Author’s Note: Kudos to whoever picks up on the movie line reference

Masterpost

Steve hated it.

Watching her come back from one-night stands with Betas and not feel any remorse about it.

She was an Omega and was granted freedom by the suppressants given to her. She was wasting her fertile cycles away on frivolous orgasms with random strangers. She was able to infiltrate regular society, mainly hide herself away into the crowd. It was not foolproof though.

There was still something there during what her cycle should be. If one did not know she was Omega, they would not attribute the feeling of arousal to her. But he – along with every other high ranking agent – knew she was and it was that much easier to pinpoint it. He could pick up on it and it made him clench his fists every time she was in close proximity, her infiltrating all his senses. He saw the other Alphas in the room tense too at those times, having a difficult time focusing on the mission briefs with her sitting so close. And one of those times was right the hell now. Tony was staring at her abashedly across the table, his fingers at his lips, his jaw clenched. His stare could be excused, he was an intense person. Bucky, next to Steve, chewed on his cheeks while he tried avoiding looking over at her.

It was selfish.

And foolish because the suppressants only did so much, and they acted like it was a solve all. S.H.I.E.L.D was trying so hard to be inclusive and it was only serving to bring down focus and morale when all they wanted to do was mount one of their team members who was acting above her Omega rank.

She had raised her hand and was answering a question. She was smart, there was no doubt about that. She had worked really hard to get up to this level and she continued to go above and beyond.

But…

Steve’s eyes raked down her clavicle to where the top of her breasts were exposed above her shirt. She most certainly had a push up on. His thoughts trailed to what they looked like bare. How they would look at different angles… when she was riding him, below him, from the side… all the different positions he could get her in. His favorite: cradled in his arms, his hand on her round stomach…

He snapped to attention when Wanda literally snapped her fingers in front of his face. He had been spacing out.

“You alright?” she snorted.

“Yeah, fine,” he said rubbing the back of his neck. He gathered up his file and got up from the table without another word, walking towards the door.

He spotted her down the hall, speaking with Thor. Thor was enthralled, looking at whatever she was showing him in her file. He was a huge teddy bear, just like Bruce.

Steve caught sight of Tony and Bucky coming to stand next to him, their eyes fixated on her too down the hallway.

“Anyone else not catch a single thing that was said in that meeting?” Bucky half joked.

“She’s distracting,” Steve snapped in hushed tones. “How do they not notice the affect she has? Has no one said anything?”

“Oh, I’ve already brought it up,” Tony told Steve and Bucky, rolling his eyes. “They’re marking it up to me not being able to ‘control myself’ and shaming me for it.” He added scornfully, “Were you forced to watch that goddamn video—”

“Where they were described as ‘delicate flowers’? Yeah, I did. And was that supposed to make us feel any better about thinking about them being put in harm’s way?” Bucky muttered, shaking his head. “They shouldn’t be putting her out in the field. Here in the office is one thing. But they shouldn’t be putting any position outside. They’re too susceptible to persuasion.”

Tony said, “That’s why it’s supposed to be secret about their Omega status.”

“I don’t like them out there,” Bucky repeated. “Not just for them but for the rest of our safety too.”

Thor was so close to her, laughing at whatever she had said. He was not affected at all. Steve ground his teeth watching that in front of him. She was comfortable around him, her hand coming to rest on his arm. He felt jealously scratching away at his insides, knowing she was in a cycle.

“It’s gonna drive me insane if I don’t leave,” Tony grated, tearing his eyes away from her to focus on the other two. “You going to the party tomorrow?”

“Yeah,” Bucky and Steve said in unison, still staring down the hall.

Tony snorted, “Who the hell planned it on a Thursday, anyhow? Don’t get too worked up if she takes a random person home. I for one won’t be there to witness that. That is unless…” He pulled a syringe out of his pocket, holding it up and Bucky swiped it in the blink of an eye, making it disappear again. Tony threw him a wry smile and said, “I think it’s about time. Don’t hesitate too long now since she’s just gone into the cycle. It’ll take a day or two though to work, remember! And don’t let Banner catch you with that.”

He clapped Bucky on the shoulder before turning on his heel, leaving the other two Alphas to stew.

<><><>

Bucky and Steve walked into the loud club, finding everyone in disarray already in the VIP area. They had been on last minute mission and had returned late and the party was already well underway. The upper space of the club was packed of S.H.I.E.L.D agents at all varying stages of intoxication. Some had set up tables to play poker – something normally illegal in clubs but no one was bothering them – as well as varying card games.

Of course both of their attention was drawn in towards Y/N. Clint was laughing at the fact she had walked back from up the stairs with a sandwich shoved halfway in her mouth. “Y/N! The food is on the way! You remember? That we ordered?”

“But I’m hungry now,” she whined, her mouth full. “And Wanda asked for half of it!”

“You’re such a baby,” Clint laughed barely keeping it together.

Wanda was in stitches, her head thrown back against her chair. Vision was laughing in tandem with Wanda, following her movement. She only laughed harder when Y/N held out the untouched part of the sandwich that was supposed to be for her.

“Thank you,” Wanda said, taking deep breaths as she tried to stifle her laughter.

Natasha appeared at Bucky and Steve’s sides, raising her eyebrows. “They are drunk,” Natasha hissed at them over the music.

And she smirked then, an unfamiliar kind of smirk. And Steve cocked his head.

“Are you drunk?”

She shrugged sheepishly which was all the answer they needed.

You grasped onto Steve’s arm, startling him. “Have you guys done shots yet?”

Steve’s eyes flicked down to her hand only for a moment and he could feel every press of her hand into his bicep. He looked back up at her and told her, “I can’t get drunk, Y/N.”

“Oh, right,” she said looking immediately pitying of him. She rubbed his arm excessively in her drunk state and he stiffened, his jaw clicking. “I’m sorry. I forgot!” She laughed, noticing how stiff he was and poked him in the chest. “You need to loosen up, Steve.”

“I’ll try,” he said forcing a smile.

“You too, Bucky,” she commented eyeing his stoic expression. She touched the side of his face and he inhaled sharply. She giggled at the response and said, “Maybe you’ll feel better after a drink? You can get drunk right?”

Before he could respond, her attention was drawn elsewhere by Wanda. As soon as she was gone, Steve let out a frustrated sigh and Bucky mirrored his state.

“She’s not taking care of herself,” Bucky murmured, shaking his head. “Anyone could take her home. Anyone!”

“Yeah, well, we’ll make sure that doesn’t happen,” Steve returned firmly. Bucky frowned and Steve rolled his eyes, “You can have some drinks. I’ll just be the sober eyes.”

“Thanks for that leeway, but this has gone on long enough hasn’t it?” Bucky asked.

“It has,” Steve exhaled heavily. Y/N was holding Clint’s hand as they danced their way down the staircase from the VIP section, away from where him and Bucky were standing.

Steve was close to her all night, especially on the dance floor. At one point, he grabbed a female Alpha who had started grinding on Y/N and yanked her away. The other Alpha had started to get buck until she realized who exactly she was trying to fight. He was not a hard man to mistake, not with all the press conferences and his mere presence on top of that. She gritted her teeth before leaving seeing his icy stare, taking the hint. Y/N was oblivious, dancing to the techno music, hands in the air still with Clint and Wanda.

Y/N fanned herself and her hands came to the hem of her shirt. Steve’s eyes almost bugged out of his head as she began to tear it off. Steve was at her side immediately, grabbing the shirt before she could remove it completely, yanking it back down.

She focused in on him, confused, and he demanded inches from her face, “What are you doing?”

“It’s hot,” she yelled at him over the music, as if that was a reasonable explanation for her behavior. He imagined all the eyes on her now, his blood pumping in his ears.

Steve shook his head and grasped her arm, pulling her through the crowd.

“Steve!” he heard Clint call from behind him, but it went ignored.

Bucky knew when Steve walked by with Y/N it was time. He got up, following Steve’s movement away from the VIP section towards a more isolated part of the club. Y/N was asking Steve where he was taking her before Bucky snuck up and administered the shot before Y/N could even react to his presence.

She began to ask, “What the hell…” but her eyes were already drooping.

Steve caught her before her knees gave out from beneath her. She was conscious but she was far past coherent. She groaned in his arms and he picked her up, hushing her.

“Wish I could have gotten even two drinks in before that,” Bucky said, eyes searching the club. He looked towards the hall and said, “Should try to take her out a back way or…?”

“She was reckless,” Steve grumbled in his ear as she slumped into his side. “Let’s take her home. She shouldn’t remember any of this. But no, let’s take her back by so everyone can see how ‘drunk’ she is.”

“Right, good idea,” Bucky agreed.

<><><>

Tony walked in, seeing Y/N at the break room table already, at 7:00am. But, her head was resting on her forearms, a large cup of coffee next to her. He looked over his shoulder, seeing people were walking by in the hallway. Slowly, he closed the door, the handle clicking into place when it was fully closed. She did not stir, and he cocked his head. She must really be out.

He tapped her shoulder and she grumbled, sitting back uncomfortably. She was squinting at him and recognized him, before rubbing at her eyes.

“You alright?” he asked, feigning concern.

“Yeah, just… not feeling great,” she told him.

Hungover. Every clue of it clear as day to everyone else. But Tony was not everyone else. He knew this was not a withdrawal from alcohol but another drug entirely. Her body was correcting itself from that nasty medication, right at the height of her heat.

“You should be drinking water instead of coffee,” Tony told her, his Alpha peaking in his tone.

It was an easy way to worm himself in. He was not supposed to do this – but they had also not been supposed to administer that drug without her consent –, it was against protocol. But he just had to know. He had to see if she would respond.

Simultaneously to his surprise and not, she made eye contact with him. He saw… doe eyes. She quickly averted her gaze and looked at her cup.

“You’re right,” she told him.

Tony watched her with arousal as she got up and tossed the coffee in the sink. She went towards the fridge, but Tony was already there, opening it up to grab a water bottle for her.

“Let me,” he told her, and she stopped, looking at him patiently as he held it out to her.

She took it from him, taking a drink. “Thanks. I… I really don’t feel great.”

Tony pointed at her and said, “You probably need oxygen. And a lot of water.”

“Oxygen?”

“Clears a hangover pretty quickly.”

“Oh, I’m not—” she began to stammer, and he could not help his lip twitching in amusement at her looking embarrassed.

Tony chuckled, “It’s alright. The party was last night. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

Y/N looked unsure if she should relax or not for a few moments before she relented, nodding. “Yeah, what idiot decided tequila shots was the way to start off the night?”

“Probably the same idiot who planned it to be on a Thursday.”

“Thirsty Thursday,” she mumbled, taking another drink.

“Thirsty Thursday,” Tony agreed lightly. “Eat something too. Something healthy. Fruit, maybe.” She grumbled in response but nodded as she sat back down at the table. She swiped an apple from the center of the table and took a large bite. Tony watched her for a few more seconds, anticipation nipping at his heels before he parted with, “Feel better.”

He needed to tell Bucky and Steve she should be ready by tonight if she was already reacting to him like that.

<><><>

Y/N was the last one in her office, the other two had gone home already. She looked up at Tony walking into the office, carrying a bag. Her stomach growled at the smell coming from the bag, her eyes falling to it. Tony only stalled for a moment, the smell of her coming to him. She was tumbling fast, she looked flushed.

Tony approached her desk, a friendly glint in his eye. “Ah, you are still here. Here, we ordered some food. I always go for greasy at some point after drinking and I’m sure it’ll help.” She looked past him to where Bucky and Steve were in the hallway.

“You didn’t have to do that,” Y/N told him timidly.

Tony loved the sight: she was tying to avoid direct eye contact, speaking in soft tones.

“Just thought we’d be nice.”

“Thank you.” She would not grab it from him. “Today has been… I don’t know. I can’t focus. I need to finish this before I leave. I just… I don’t feel great,” she said her voice getting smaller as her eyes were dragged back to her computer screen.

Tony ordered, “Press save and close the laptop. Eat.” He placed the bag on her desk. “It’ll help.”

He turned to leave, and she blurted, “Where are you going?”

Tony came to a stop, his gaze locked with Steve and Bucky, his back to her. To them, he gave them a sly, knowing smile that only lasted a few seconds before he turned back to her.

“I mean, you don’t have to leave and go eat somewhere else if you already have your food too. You don’t want it to get cold. I promise I’m not throwing up or anything. I just feel off. Like a headache… a little hot.”

She wanted them to stay, that was obvious. She needed something from them and even if she could not figure out what it was just yet, her body was telling her they were needed.

“Sure,” Tony chirped. “If it won’t bother you.”

She shook her head and he started walking back towards the desk beside hers. His suit jacket came off, and he swung it around the back of the chair. Steve and Bucky had come into the room as well, purposely leaving the door open. Bucky sat across from Y/N, his eyes following her movements as she opened the bag Tony had placed in front of her. He watched the way her hands shook ever so slightly, her tongue running across her bottom lip as she opened the container of food.

Y/N made a satisfied sound as she tasted it. “God, thank you. This is delicious. I needed it. I feel… shaky.”

The three of them around her was making it difficult for her to focus though. She kept stealing glances at them, being met with blatant stares back as they slowly ate. Steve adjusted, trying to hide his length that was starting to grow at her being so damn close and smelling so damn good.

Tony spilled some on the desk and said, “Shit!”

Before she could offer he was leaning over her, reaching across the grab a kleenex from the other side of her desk. He heard her inhale and he forced himself to not react, sitting back down, dabbing at the food he had spilled. His jaw was clenched; he should not have done that because now he was working himself up quickly.

The three of them noticed her chewing slowed to a stop and her eyes moved between the three of them. Something was starting to click… the tense silence in the room getting under her skin. The off feeling no doubt growing ever stronger.

Swallowing, she cleared her throat. Her voice was higher pitched than normal, “Do you guys want a cookie? To go with it for after, I mean? I… there’s some over here.”

She pushed her chair back quickly and moved away from her desk. Along the wall, she fumbled with the drawers, looking for these mysterious cookies. She was getting squirrelly, nervous, like she wanted some air. They could all sense it and they wanted to get ahead of her stressing out while they could. All three were out of their seats: Bucky strode across the room away from her, closing the door while Tony and Steve came closer towards her.

Y/N turned around startled at them all having moved so quickly, holding a handful of fortune cookies. Bucky leaned against the doorframe, staring directly back at her. She gave a small laugh, “Are people still working out there? Were we being too loud, do you think?”

Tony and Steve said nothing and her smile faltered, a frown growing. “Can…Can I just… get by,” she said trying to skirt around them but each time, one of them blocked her way. She tried to brush it off, holding the cookie out. “Do you just want it now?”

She asked, so innocently. Sweetly. Steve shuddered at it. She could not hide her true nature even in her tone. And the phrasing, the three of them smirked.

Bucky was still by the door, leaning against the frame. He popped a chocolate in his mouth, watching the scene unfold.

“Well, I would really like to get eat—” She said, trying again to break through their rank and being unsuccessful. She frowned visibly now, worry lines showing up on her face. She chuckled nervously, “Did I do something wrong?”

Steve noticed the spiral coming. He could hear the increase in her heartrate. She knew she was surrounded by Alphas and was growing uncomfortable. Especially since she was alone, it was late, and they were encroaching. His hand came up to slap over her mouth and she yelled frightened, the sound muffled. He pulled her away from the counter, dragging her back towards the third desk. Tony was ready, grabbing her arms and twisting them behind her back, slipping the retractable cuffs around her wrists. The cookies tumbled to the floor and he paid them no mind, stepping on them as he passed her to Steve solely. Her arms were bound at the small of her back and she fell face first against the table. All three of them were growing hard at the sight.

As soon as Steve removed his hand she began to scream, and he clamped back down.

“Omega,” Steve purred in her ear and she whimpered behind his hand. He laced his tone, his Alpha rumbling, “You’re going to be quiet aren’t you?” She said nothing, her chest just rapidly moving up and down. “Omega… are you gonna be quiet? Nod for me if you are gonna be good.” She nodded frantically against his hand and he slowly removed it.

Tearfully, she said, “Can you let me go?”

“Oh, no. No, we can’t, beautiful,” Steve said, his finger running down her exposed neck, causing her to squirm. He pulled away, turning his attention to Tony.

“But… I… I didn’t do anything wrong,” she tried to plead, looking at Bucky across the desk to where he was standing at the door. “I followed all the rules. I—” Tony’s hands lifted up underneath her dress and she let out a choked noise, craning her neck to look back at him. “Alpha, please!”

Tony audibly groaned at her slipping up and giving in to calling him by his title. He yanked her leggings and underwear down to her ankles. He freed himself from his slacks and his fingers pressed at her pussy. She buried her face in the desk, trying to squeeze her legs together.

“Oh, come now. None of that,” Tony ordered, and she loosened. His fingers pressed in, stroking her slowly. She was already wet, probably had been for the better part of the day. It is why the three of them had stayed away, they could have lost control before now and ruined it all otherwise.

“You’re not being punished, Omega,” he told her. “Rewarded actually…” She whimpered and he cooed as he continued stroking her gently, “Oh, sweetpea… beautiful Omega. You’re going to be just fine. You’re in the perfect hands. You feel sick for a reason and we are going to help you.”

The more he spoke, the more he watched her body relax against his hand and his tone. The smell of her was driving him insane – he could only imagine Steve and Bucky not being able to touch her at all. He should not stall for long, wouldn’t want to start a fight.

“You’re going to feel so much better,” Tony promised as she tried to push back on his fingers, and he bit his lip at the sight. His fingers were gone, and she let out a disappointed noise. Tony rubbed his cock up and down her ass, slowly. “God, this is gonna feel so fucking good.”

Tony’s head pressed in and she gasped, adjusting to his width. He gave a strangled laugh, relishing in how tight her walls were. She was squirming beneath him and he gave her a rapt smack on the ass.

“I know you haven’t had an Alpha cock before but relax, Omega,” Tony ordered gruffly.

“It’s too much,” she said pitifully.

“You’ll adjust. You’ll adjust,” Tony moaned, pressing in further. “You’ll be able to take all of me. All of us. It’s what you were built for.”

Bucky was becoming shifty, chewing on his thumb nail, his eyes boring into Y/N. He had stepped away from the door, coming closer to where she was. His dick was outlined in his jeans but he had refrained from releasing himself just yet. Steve on the other hand had taken his cock out and was stroking himself, needing some type of contact. Both of their eyes were blown wide.

“Oh. Tony,” Bucky said, aroused. “You would love this sight.”

Y/N’s eyes were glazed over as Tony thrusts grew deeper and quicker. Looking the perfect example of a subservient Omega, impaled on an Alpha’s cock.

“I love the feeling,” Tony choked back, holding tight to her wrists to drive himself deeper.

Soon, they came tumbling down. Tony came with loud grunts, emptying inside of her and he left a claim mark on her shoulder. Tony only took a moment to kiss at her neck, whispering something sweet into her ear before he backed off. His pants were buttoned back up and he collapsed in one of the chairs, his eyes falling on her.

Steve wasted no time coming behind her and entering her with ease. She whimpered at the intrusion, still so sensitive. His thrusts were unbridled, worked up into a frenzy. Y/N’s hips bounced off the desk.

“Alpha,” she whined.

“You’re okay, you’re okay,” Steve panted, his fingers digging into the skin at her hips. “You feel so goddamn good, Omega. You’re doing so well. So, so well. Everything I dreamed.”

The room was filled with skin slapping skin and the aroused moans leaving Y/N.

“Alpha,” she whined again, and Steve groaned, knowing she was getting close. He could feel her clenching around him.

And when she did, shaking and whimpering, Steve thrusted quickly as she tightened. He finished with a shout unable to help himself, coating her walls. He left another distinct claim bite at the base of her neck. His fingers traced it gently before he noticed Bucky standing there.

“You know, for an Alpha. Buck, you sure as hell are patient,” Steve joked.

Bucky gave a curt smirk before shoving Steve out of the way. Steve held his hands up in surrender, turning away and letting Bucky have his way with her. Y/N was doing so well still, behaving and letting Bucky rut her into the desk without pushback. Bucky had been right, Tony thought to himself. He loved that look in her eyes. She was lost to her arousal.

“P-p-please, alpha,” she begged moments before she cried out again.

Bucky grunted loudly, his thrusts becoming more erratic, chasing his high. He shook as he emptied himself and went to the opposite shoulder to leave another claim mark. She was exhausted, breathing heavily having not one but three Alphas imprinting themselves on her and using her.

The door opened and all three of them froze, Bucky still buried in Y/N, his large hands at her hips.

Clint was standing there, his mouth fallen open in disbelief at the scene. There were a few seconds of suspended shock before he asked them disgusted, “You couldn’t even lock it?”

“Didn’t think about it,” Tony admitted.

“You? You didn’t think? That’s rich,” Clint spat back at him. He noticed Y/N was handcuffed and realization dawned on him. He glared daggers at the three of them and snapped, “You’re going to get sidelined for this!”

“No, I don’t think so. More like chewed out… I’ve been chewed out before,” Steve said. Impatiently he added, “Now, will you close the damn door?”

His request went ignored by Clint, who pressed on furiously, “No, seriously. You guys know that right? Compromising an agent like this! Especially one they’re trying to keep up because they’re in such big demand to even out the ranks! She’s only going to respond to your Alpha commands now! That compromises her!”

“And why is anyone complaining about that? She should be answering to her superiors,” Tony remarked, watching her intently. She was so lost, trying to figure out what was going on. She had no purpose without feeling a cock being driven into her when she was this worked up into her heat. Tony almost felt bad for her…

“Barton, are you going to let Barnes pull out so we can untie her or what? She’s got to be getting sore by now. Wouldn’t want to hurt our ‘delicate flower’.” Clint stood his ground and Tony lost his humor, snapping, “Get the fuck out, Barton. It’s already been done. Now. Before I lose my goddamn temper.”

Clint’s jaw was clenched as he turned away from the three Alphas, slamming the door behind him so loudly it shook the wall.

“Speaking of that,” Bucky said, clearing his throat. He leaned in, catching her attention. “Darling… do you want Alpha to finish inside you?” She nodded fervently and Bucky grunted in response, rutting against her backside even as he pulled away from her. He pulled her up and she stood on shaky legs. In her ear, he asked, “Do you want to always be finished inside of?” She nodded again, biting her bottom lip. “Hmm… you want to please us? That’s what I thought. So. How about after you take in that feeling of that warm seed inside you, you go up to the director and tell her you want to resign? Tell her you wanna be a good little housewife for us? How does that sound?”

“Okay,” she agreed.

Steve’s fingers pressed her cheeks in, pressing her lips out and he smiled. “You wanna be an asset to the team in your best way. Such a team player.” He shot Tony a look at the end of the desk, an aroused gleam in his eye. “I’m sure we can get you a proper collar.”

“I’ve already got it built. I’ve been waiting for her to learn her place.” Tony then added, “But she can’t live with me. Pepper will kill me.”

“I’ve got it,” Steve said.

Steve rubbed her stomach and said, “Regardless, she’s gonna be serving her real purpose soon.”

~~~

Forever tags: @coconutqueen21

#abo marvel #steve rogers x reader #tony stark x reader #bucky barnes x reader #alpha steve rogers #alpha tony stark #alpha bucky barnes #my shit #dark smut

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dmb-fngrl · 3 years

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Summer Bluberries--Monoma Neito

A/N: This is my second ABO fic ever. My first one is, sadly, still up, and I hope this one is much better! Thanks for 50+ followers!

TW: ABO, Scenting, Falling in Love, Alpha Monoma, Omega Reader

(I got this wonderful picture from @agustcult)

It was a different smell than you’d expect from an Alpha. It was warm, comforting, and sugary-sweet. He smelled exactly like a fresh blueberry pie.

His disposition, however, was less sweet.

No one else understood your fondness for the blonde Alpha, but you saw something--be it the hidden softness, the fierce loyalty to his class, or that sweet, sweet blueberry scent--no one else did. Even when he would insult your class, you couldn’t help but hope those words would be directed at you. He was insulting you far less frequently than he used to, and even if they were insults, you felt yourself craving any form of attention you could get from Monoma.

You were beginning to feel lonely, especially around your already-mated friends. The Omegas had someone to help them with heats, Alphas had someone to protect, and Betas just loved being tied to someone forever. You were the only unmated Omega in your class, causing some of the unmated Alphas (mainly Todoroki and Bakugou) to vie for your attention. It was stifling when they didn’t allow you to speak to whoever they assumed was their competition, including the fruit-scented object of your affections.

One such occurrence happened on a warm spring afternoon as you were training outside. You punched the bag in front of you, pausing to catch your breath before you smelled a clean scent--almost like hand sanitizer--float towards you.

“How’re you doing, baby?” the dual-colored Alpha purred, sauntering up to you, wreathing you in his near-antiseptic scent. It was too sharp, too harsh for your tastes. You couldn’t find it in you to dislike him though. Even if he had tried to keep you from other Alphas, Todoroki had never been less than courteous to you.

Unfortunately, where there was one, the other always followed, and soon the scent of ash and fire began to compete with the disinfectant smell in your nose.

“Hey, Y/N. Is this extra bothering you?” Bakugou walked up behind you, shoving Todoroki away with his shoulder and wrapping his arm around yours. You shook the overly aggressive Alpha off, continuing to punch your punching bag (that it was a miracle that you got outside, thank you teleportation quirk!) as if neither of them was there.

They, of course, continued to talk, bragging of their accomplishments and having small skirmishes over who was the better Alpha. Finally, your watch beeped, signaling the end of your workout. Neither Alpha seemed to notice, still fighting over why you should give me attention instead of him! You grabbed onto your equipment, a bright flash of light surrounded you, and you were safe. Back in your dorm, away from those thickheaded Alphas outside.

You purred softly, your Omega finally at rest as you took in the sights and smells of your dorm. Your scent--you had been told it was like honeysuckle and apples--mixed with the scent of one particular hoodie at the bottom of your nest. You had stolen it from Monoma’s room when Class 3-B was on a field trip. It barely held his scent anymore, so you had a few options.

A: Go to his dorm and ask him, politely, to scent a few more hoodies for you and also you and a large portion of your nest.

B: Sneak over to his room and steal more clothes.

You went with option B, deciding that that would be far less humiliating and far less likely to get you caught by anyone from your class. The only people who knew were a select few from both of your classes, and they wouldn’t tell a soul.

#############################################

You decided to make your move that night, when you had picked up that Monoma would be on a late shift at his internship. Unfortunately, since you hadn’t seen it before, you couldn’t teleport directly to his room. You could only find their building, sneaking through the common room to the boys’ hallway. Luckily, all the doors were labelled with names.

You eventually found Monoma’s room, labelled with a sign that had beautiful white flowers edging it. The door clicked as you unlocked it, and you cringed at the sound. You shut the door behind you, making sure no one saw you enter. Taking a deep sniff in, you instantly felt comforted. The scent of blueberry and sugar flooded your senses.

You opened his closet, sifting through its contents for the exact right piece of clothing to add to your nest. Despite the door opening and closing sounding monumentally loud when you did it, it was actually very quiet. Either that, or you were way too absorbed in finding another of Monoma’s hoodies. Said Alpha was now watching you, mouth agape and mind whirling.

You were the one who had stolen his hoodie? Monoma didn’t keep track or anything, but the one you had taken had been his favorite, and he knew he didn’t leave it in the laundry basket or anywhere else, for that matter. But you had taken it? To be fair, Monoma was decently attractive. For every person who found him annoying, there was someone willing to overlook that for his good looks and charm. Of all the available Omegas he could’ve had, it seemed ironic that he would fall for one from his rival class. The Alpha couldn’t find it in his heart to hurt you, though, so his insults had been few and far between.

And here you were, basically professing your affection for him by stealing his clothes. Finally, you found one of his t-shirts that was up to your taste, burying your nose in it and giving it a deep sniff. Monoma had just enough time to jump up, closing the door behind him as quietly as he could in his haste. You didn’t notice, using your quirk to go back to your room. You had had one too many close calls on your way to Monoma’s room, and you wished to avoid any on the way back (unbeknownst to you, you had already been caught).

#############################################

Monoma began to try and take later shifts at his internship, noting that whenever he did, more of his shirts would disappear. The only downside to this was that he was beginning to run out of shirts. He knew at some point he would have to confront you about it, but he couldn’t deny how his Alpha adored seeing you happy. You had been practically preening these past few weeks, too, enjoying the pseudo-attention you were getting from Monoma. It was nothing compared to the real thing, but being surrounded by the Alpha’s scent was good for you.

Still, he couldn’t ignore the fact that he was running out of shirts. He decided that Thursday would be the night. He told all his friends that he would be working, but he was actually hiding in his closet, lying in wait.

You came in a little after 9, opening and closing the door with the same caution you did every time you tried this. You paused to close your eyes, taking in Monoma’s scent once again. You cooed, softly, letting out pleasant pheromones that you hoped didn’t taint the room too much. Monoma had to fight back a purr at the scent.

You shoved apart the doors, pausing mid-sniff and letting out a shriek as you saw the blonde squatting on the floor. You began rambling out apologies, averting your eyes as a sign of respect to the Alpha, although you had probably disrespected him already by stealing his property.

You were still going on and on, mumbling something about returning all of his clothes, and never coming back again, but you barely had time to breathe before Monoma captured your lips in a tender kiss. “I’m not mad,” he said, “You may be a typical class 1-A idiot, but I could never be mad at you, Y/N. Just, please return my shirts? I need those.”

You nodded numbly, blinking your eyes to help you process if you just heard what you thought you did. He...wasn’t mad that you stole his clothes? Even better, he kissed you? You were so lost in thought that you barely registered what Monoma said next.

“Oh, but, love?” Your heart flipped at the nickname. “Keep that first sweatshirt you took. Consider it a courting gift.”

#mha monoma #bnha monoma #mha neito #bnha neito #monoma neito #monoma x reader #alpha/beta/omega verse #omegaverse #alpha monoma #omega reader #scenting #abo #falling in love #monoma fluff #bnha fanfiction #mha fanfiction

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jacaranda-bloom · 4 years

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Monthly fic rec showcasing some of the fics I’ve read this month. Once again, there are quite a few fics, which is a testament to how lucky we truly are to have such an amazing group of talented writers in this fandom.

In this months instalment there are fics from @yvesaintlourent @soldouthaz @liltinylouis @i-graefin @allwaswell16 @cocoalou @risthebrave @kingsofeverything @jaerie @sadaveniren and @lululawrence.

Thank you to all the writers for sharing their wonderful talent with us. Please don’t forget to leave kudos and a comment if you enjoy their work and also reblog their Tumblr posts where available. 💜

💜 A Trail of Honey Through It All by faeriestyles

@yvesaintlourent Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 27k

# Trailer Park Harry, Mechanic Harry, Rich Louis, Fashion Student Louis, Smut.

The boy in front of him, well really, the man in front of him, was like something out of a confusing wet dream. Built, tall, tan and muscular, his skin glistened with sweat after a long day of working outdoors with his hands. He was wearing a cut up old American football shirt, the bottom hem was torn and the sleeves were cut off to the point where the t-shirt was really just a loose tank top. The shorts he had on had clearly been full length jeans at one point, and were now just crudely cut off above the knee. His white socks were pulled up too high on his calves, and the brown work boots he had on were old as fuck, the leather peeling along the edges of the soles. Curly brown hair stuck out from the edges of his backwards snapback, and there was a smudge of grease wiped along his brow bone. The smattering of hair along his jaw proved that he hadn’t shaved in a week or two, the hair growing in thicker across his upper lip and around his chin. His sinfully bowed mouth was pink and plump, and Louis was suddenly hyper-focused on the way that he chewed at the toothpick stuck between his lips. He looked like he needed a shower. Louis wanted to lick him.

Or, the TPH fic we’ve all been waiting for.

💜 You Know What They Say by soldouthaz

@soldouthaz Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 10k

# PWP, Intern Harry, Secretary Louis, Smut.

(You know what they say) ...nice guys always finish last.

💜 Lock Me Up With Your Love by clicheanna

@liltinylouis Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 30k

# Famous Harry, (kind of) Famous Louis, Musician Harry, Ex-Footballer Louis, Coming Out, Karaoke, Baked Goods.

Louis had a messed-up knee, ruined career, and labradoodle to take care of. Harry had a normal knee, perfect career, and concern for his recluse neighbour. Harry's baking skills were enough to bring them together.

💜 You Kill My Mind by Graefin

@i-graefin Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 13k

# D/S Relationship, Dom/Daddy/Top Harry, Sub/Baby/Bottom Louis, Porn With Feelings, Bondage. (Read full tags and author’s note.)

Harry has always been ashamed to reveal his kinks to friends and partners alike. One day he meets a man who seems perfectly designed for him and they embark on a wonderful, sex-filled exploration journey.

💜 Waiting by allwaswell16

@allwaswell16 Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 8k

# ABO, Omega Louis, Alpha Harry, Pining, Sexual Tension, Soulmates, Nesting, Heat, Idiots In Love, Smut.

Louis Tomlinson was Harry’s omega, of this Harry had always been sure. Unfortunately for Harry, Louis seemed to think they were just best friends. The six weeks that Harry has to live with Louis were going to be rough.

💜 The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face by sweetrevenge

@cocoalou Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 5k

# Strangers to Lovers, Meet-Cute, Pining, Fluff, There is a twist, Smut.

“Hi, is this seat taken?” The stranger asks and Harry swears he short circuits for a moment. He’s been staring at him from across the bar all night and he still doesn’t feel prepared to see him this close up. He gazes at the stranger for what probably is an inappropriately long amount of time, eyes catching on things he hadn't noticed when he was sitting so far away. He opens his mouth to say “No, please sit” but then... “Did you know that center bit of citrus fruit is called a juice sac?” Harry is a little bit enamoured with the gorgeous stranger sitting across from him at the bar.

💜 Too Nervous To Be Lovers by WritewhatIwant

Harry/Louis | Mature | 6k

# Roommates, Quarantine, Miscommunication, Mutual Pining, Snuggling, Smut. (Read full tags and author’s note.)

Louis doesn't want to spend quarantine with Harry, his straight roommate, who doesn't even acknowledge his existence.

💜 At Your Fingertips by falsegoodnight

@risthebrave Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 27k

# Strangers to Lovers, Bake Harry, Calm Employee Harry, Teacher Louis, Insecure Louis, D/S Undertones, Voice Kink, Phone Sex, Smut. (Read full tags and author’s note.)

He finds himself wrapped up in sheets in bed on Thursday night, staring at the familiar name on a new story that was posted the night before.

His fingers twitch, ready to hit play and surrender to his impulses, saving the regret and turmoil for later.

And still he hesitates, internally praying that he’ll somehow gain the strength to exit out within the next few moments before he inevitably loses his patience and hits the button.

Three… Two… One.

Play.

OR the one where Louis really should have seen it coming.

💜 If I Had No Love To Give (I Wouldn’t Give It To You) by kingsofeverything

@kingsofeverything Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 30k

# Exes to Lovers, Chef Louis, Chef Harry, Older Louis/Harry, 35/33, Smut. (Read full tags and author’s note.)

Small town restaurateur Louis Tomlinson needs someone competent to work in his kitchen.

Chef Harry Styles needs a job.

💜 The Prince and The Thief by jaerie

@jaerie Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 20k

# ABO, Omega Harry, Alpha Louis, Prince Harry, Thief Louis, Rapunzel Elements, Innocent Harry, Strangers to Lovers, Knotting, Bonding, Kidnapping, Smut. (Read full tags.)

Harry is an omega prince locked in a tower and Louis is the thief sent to kidnap him. Nothing turns out as planned.

💜 Tastes Like Strawberries by SadaVeniren

@sadaveniren Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Explicit | 5k

# ABO, Alpha Harry, Omega Louis, College, Nesting, First Time, Smut.

I’m stressed. I’m nesting and demand cuddles. Come over

Harry frowned and double checked who the text was from. Yup, it still said Louis - Grad, which meant it was from Louis from his grad school.

aka Louis texts Harry by mistake. It works out.

💜 Wrinkles by lululawrence

@lululawrence Tumblr Fic Post

Harry/Louis | Not Rated | 4k

# Soulmates, Fluff and Crack, Age Difference, Plot Twists, No Smut.

Louis looked at the elderly couple sitting at the table across from where he and Harry were currently sat. They looked so happy, and he admired the wrinkles that appeared beside their eyes and mouths. The signs of their time passed on this earth, for all to see. Signs he would never see on himself.

#July 28 2020 #28th appreciation #fic rec #ficrectag

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ladylunasolis · 4 years

Text

Zutara Week 2020 - Day 2 “Counterpart”

Thought I would take this a different route (and barely made it to post before the day is over in my time! pls forgive any errors lol). My first modern/college AU for Zutara.

You can also read this on AO3 :)

Rating: G

Zuko shifted his stool forward, and adjusted the easel his canvas was on. Blank white stared back at him. Today, they would be having new live models coming in to start their final project for the quarter - and the best ones would be displayed at the university student art show. They were working on portraits, different styles of painting one, and would have to submit a piece in their own style. Whatever Zuko lacked in expressing emotion verbally, he always did his best to show it in his art.

One of the things that did challenge him about portraits specifically was working with other people and being responsible to get their feeling across. Not one to back down from a challenge, Zuko had definitely worked hard and took extra practice to get a bit more comfortable.

He was feeling pretty confident to start this painting. And then the new models walked in.

One lanky young man with wild hair strolled languidly to the side of the classroom as the curious whispers of the class continued on. Zuko noted his eyebrows were in a shape he had never seen before, and it would probably be interesting to get them just right. Next, a girl with chin-length brown hair and a pretty smile walked in talking to the last model.

If that first girl was pretty to Zuko, this last girl was stunning. She had beautiful chestnut hair in gentle waves, golden skin, and surprisingly blue eyes to die for. Zuko cleared his throat and scooted again to hide his face, an unexpected shyness hitting him.

Katara noticed him with the cough and shuffle behind the canvas. She caught a golden eye surrounded by light pink peering at her before ducking back to start prep on what materials to use. Gold? She had never seen such a hue before. Curiosity flit through her mind as she slipped her bag off and prepped to sit for this session.

Suki had told her about a way to get some extra credit for their shared class, and she had sat for a few photographers in the past so she didn’t mind helping out. She hardly knew the guy with them, Jet, but he was nice enough. He was definitely a smooth talker and had tried to kiss her once when they went out with Suki and other mutual friends, but he was only a fun distraction.

Bad boys were definitely a type she’s had, but Katara couldn’t help but wonder about the shy guy shielding himself from her.

Some time had passed and the professor went up to Zuko, regarding his art with an amused expression Katara could see. “Zuko, you realize there are three people modeling, correct?”

Zuko’s face heated up and he took a moment to still himself and make his voice as steady as possible. “Yeah, I’m just starting off with her since she’s closest to me.” Zuko wanted the ground to swallow him whole, as quickly and inconspicuously as possible. He looked up to the models once more and found the blue-eyed girl watching him, a small smile on her lips.

Zuko. Katara had never heard that name before and despite that, she thought it would feel nice on her tongue. She felt a bit self-conscious for a moment after realizing he was focused on her, and so she straightened up and shifted her shawl down a touch to show a little more bare shoulder. She was flattered at his attention and Katara had always been a kind person. She figured she could do a small kindness to be an interesting model, and help Zuko get a good grade. The skill was all up to him but in a way, she felt like his partner in this project.

The class was coming to and end and she replaced the tank top strap back where it should be, and skirt over the workout shorts she had on for the class. Zuko was completely hidden while gathering his own things and Katara was going to say hi to him until Suki grabbed her by the elbow.

“Sokka, Aang, and Toph are at White Lotus for happy hour! They have shots waiting for us.”

“I think I-.”

“Uh-uh, I don’t wanna hear it, Katara. We deserve it!” Suki shot her a toothy grin which Katara always had a hard time being stern with. She shot one last glance at Zuko who had his back to them, before letting herself get dragged out with a laugh.

Behind her retreating form, Zuko was packing his things when he heard her name. A secret smile formed on his lips and he chuckled. “Katara, huh?” Beautiful.

The project continued on, as each class was only an hour long. Zuko wasn’t so taken aback anymore and was able to keep his wits about him each time he saw Katara. She always sat closest to him and it got to the point where she would give a smile to greet him, and he would return a small nod in return. Katara was appreciative of the fact Zuko finally let himself show his whole face from behind the canvas. It would have been a shame if she never had a chance to really see it — a light pink scar running on one side of his face and despite that he was still one of the most beautiful men she had ever seen.

On this day Katara’s ears piqued as the professor neared Zuko’s form. Zuko had taken to standing up, and was close to the canvas, brush moving slowly. The professor hummed and Zuko only turned to acknowledge him for a moment. “Zuko this piece…there’s more feeling behind it than I’ve seen so far this quarter.”

Blue met gold for a split second and Zuko straightened up. “Well, I guess you could say I was inspired.”

Ever the curious girl, those words triggered an even bigger desire to see this Zuko’s work. That’s it, I’m talking to him today. No matter what Suki has planned!

And so Katara didn’t even wait to be fully dressed in her street clothes before going up to Zuko, zipping up her light jacket. He startled when she greeted him. “Hey! Uh, how’s it going?”

How’s it going? Really, Katara? You have more game than that. She resisted the urge to roll her eyes. But then again, I really don’t even know him as much as I know the back of his easel.

“Oh uh, hey,” Zuko scooted the easel to face the wall and neared her one a few short movements. He shot her a lopsided smile. Katara noted the brightness of his eyes. “It’s going pretty good. What about you?” His movements didn’t go unnoticed and she aimed a pointed look at his easel before returning her eyes to him.

“Good,” she replied with a smile, tucking her hair behind her ears before offering her hand in a handshake. “I’m Katara, the girl - or I guess - one of the girls you’ve been painting.”

Zuko took her hand and Katara noticed how warm his was. It was also much more smooth than she thought it would be. A little calloused and dry paint to the touch, but smooth. “Hah yeah, nice to meet you. I’m Zuko.” He ran his other hand through his hair absentmindedly and got a spot of blue in his locks. Katara giggled and pointed it out.

“You got a little…” His eyes widened, then he looked down at his hand and rolled his eyes.

“Thanks,” he mumbled, grabbing a cloth to wipe himself, small blush on his face. “You would think I would be used to it by now after painting for so long.”

“Well don’t worry, I think blue actually kinda suits you,” Katara quipped. The ghost of another smile passed over his lips before she continued on. “From what your professor said it sounds like your painting’s going well! I’ve been so curious to see it…”

Katara took a step towards the easel, and Zuko stepped in front of her with his hands up, sheepish grin on his face. “Sorry, it’s practically done but I kinda have this thing about my subjects seeing a work in progress…”

“Oh, like bad luck or something?” she asked, lifting an eyebrow and crossing her arms, smirking up at him. Boy, he was definitely taller than her. And she couldn’t place the scent, but he smelled good even with a paint apron on. Zuko thought a moment and shook his head, deliberately picking each word to answer.

“I want to keep my subject’s emotions as genuine and authentic as possible. I’m still learning all this too, but in the past when I’ve had to practice, sometimes a person starts to think they should sit a certain way or have their face be a certain way. But the thing I’m really starting to like about portraits is capturing who they really are in those moments, the small moments they let their guard down and let me into their world. It’s my job to interpret that onto canvas.” Zuko paused as Katara remained silent and laughed. “That’s the first time I’ve said that out loud before. Seems a little more weird than it sounded it my head.”

Katara shook her head. “No, I don’t think it’s weird at all. When you put it like that, it does make sense. Every artist has their way of doing things, right? So this is your thing. I can respect that.” She gave him a smile, softer this time, before turning away. “I guess I just wish I could see it somehow when it’s done.”

Zuko hesitated as she began to talk to Suki, who had been talking to his classmate Ty Lee. He just finally spoken to Katara and is that how he was going to leave it? She was almost out of the classroom when he called out to her.

“Katara!”

The sound of a new voice calling her name made her turn quicker, to see Zuko making his way over to her and Suki. Her friend shot her a look and actually took the cue to give her a little bit of space — though still listening intently.

“Thursday is the last day we’ll be doing this project, and after that we’ll be submitting to a panel. If my work does get picked, how about we go to the art show together so I can tell you all about it.” Katara noted it was as if Zuko had decided on something in the few moments between their conversation and now. Even the last words he said weren’t really a question, more so a request. She felt a flutter in her chest as she nodded.

“Yeah, that sounds like a plan.” And Zuko’s smile widened.

A little over a week later, she arrived at the show to meet Zuko, who had been there early to set up. Suki had bombarded her with questions about that black haired hottie after she made sure they exchanged numbers. During the last session, Katara did her best to keep in mind what Zuko had said. She just let herself be and stopped worrying. She even exchanged a few smiles with the boy behind the canvas, a few jokes after class.

Not long after she sent the “I’m here” text, she heard him call her name. I could get really get used to that. “Hey, I’m glad you made it!”

“Of course, I wasn’t going to miss this!” She really meant it and he gave her a lopsided grin, guiding her along with a hand barely brushing her back. “I’ve been way too curious.”

“I’m sure you have been,” he replied, nervous once more. He had never revealed his art to someone like this before and he wasn’t sure how it was going to go. He brought her to a wall set up with the light focusing on the singular canvas displayed in this section. “Here it is.”

Katara’s lips parted as her mouth dropped. Suki and Jet were painted on the right and left sides of the canvas, respectively, and there she was in the middle and larger than the other two. They were all full body in the frame but her’s was definitely the center. Brilliant blues of all different shades surrounded all of them and it was almost as if they were windswept, or perhaps underwater would be the best way to describe it with how her hair floated around her. She looked ethereal, she was glowing, she was happy, she was…Katara didn’t even know she could look like this.

Zuko stood next to her, waiting with bated breath. Katara looked up at him almost speechless. “How did you…get all of that from me just sitting there?”

Zuko shrugged and looked up at his painting. “I guess…that’s just how I saw you. That’s how you looked in my eyes.”

“Zuko, it’s…it’s beautiful. It’s really lovely, and I don’t know much about art but everyone is so well done,” she managed to get out, finally coming down from her surprise. Zuko looked down at her at his side and smirked.

“I couldn’t have done it without you to inspire me.” Katara and blushed and mumbled something of gratitude and Zuko couldn’t help but think about how adorable she looked. “So, what questions do you have?”

Thank you for reading!

#zutara #zutara week #zutara week 2020 #zutara fanfiction #writing #atla #avatar #avatar the last airbender #avatar: the last airbender #zuko #katara #counterpart

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prose-for-hire · 3 years

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Yesss , yay!!!

(I wrote this all out before but tumblr decided to delete it>:( )

Basically our lunch room , for first years of forensics and applied science is a lab. I hate going to canteen and stuff like that so I just stay there. Anyways it was just me this boy and and this girl. And our teacher came in to talk to us about how we was doing and noticed we hadn’t made any friends yet. So, she said we should do small talk and say something embarrassing.

So, I took this literally and began talking to them. I had my switch out , the boy was like

“Is that a Wii u?”

I was like no, “I wish then I could play all my Lego games, it’s my switch.”

“Ph what Lego games to do you have?”

Lord of the rings, Lego Star Wars , the hobbit , pirates of the Caribbean, Indiana Jones one and two, probably more. But I cannot play them on my switch and I am still waiting for the Star Wars f r the switch to come.”

“The complete saga?”

“Yesss!”

Then he told me he didn’t see the assignment we had due in that day until yesterday day and I was like oh my gosh I was doing that all holiday only finished Thursday after staying up till five doing it wihilst listening to Andy serkis.We discussed other things too all today but in the end I decided it was fitting to mention my crush on David Bowie after we complained about our parents.

“David Bowie?”( this point the girl had went to her lesson whilst we walked to ours.)

Yess , I wrote a fanfiction about him, one you don’t want to know about the other had obi-wan kenobi in”

“Obi-wan?”

“Yeah, I have a crush on him too.” “Oh wow, what did you write about for English then”

“Well basically for my gsce I wrote about Andy samberg, his parents had the same death as Batman’s but they were killed by the backstreet boys.” Then I tell him the story

“Wait a machete?” “Yep he kebabs them with a machete named Sam.”

Then I began to tell him about my mandalorian fanfiction and lord of the rings ones

“Yeah I quote i this is what I wrote ‘you know remind me of a fridge, but a broken one because your yogurt it warm.” WHY DID I ADMIT I WROTE THAT. HE LAUGHED

“Oh wow.I once wrote a fanfiction on doctor who.” I assumed he he liked the conversation because he didn’t run off he held doors for me and everything. “Ph I love that.”

** “I am sorry I’m talking so much, I haven’t made friends since year 7 “

“Neither have I.”

“Basically obi-wan is in this fanfiction too and he’s frenc and somehow there’s a lightsaber theres and azogs dick gets chopped off and is put o a cocktail stick on display. “

“He’s french? Yeah I can see that happening.” (My memory is terrible.)

OH AND WE START TALKING ABOUT LESSON AND I AM LIKE I HOPE THEY DONT SAY MY NAME BECAUSE I BET THEY WILL SAY MY NAME WRONG. “Seriously it’s lilianlea ( lili an lee) not Lilian LeaH! It’s so annoying.” “Ph same, I get egg, Jammy dodger and blah blah.” (Don’t want to give his name up.

“People suck why they so stupid, I got called lil before, I am not a rapper.”He laughs.

Anyways we go into class I get my folder out, it’s covered with David Bowie, obi-wan and picture of obi-wan. “Oh no.” He looks over to see my pull out a soggy piece of paper ( on the bus my drink had spilt everywhere and I told him this.

“Yeah you wouldn’t guess I like David Bowie, would you?o h and obi-wan”

“Ph thays him from the office, I can’t think of his name.”

“Michael Scott?” “Yess that’s it.”

Anyways it was really exciting because this is the first time and the most I’ve spoke so so much at college, i had spoken to him to him before but not about things other than college work, I always fthougnt he was cute. Though, nothing will happen because I never have relationships no one ever likes me because I am ugly.BUT YEAH THAT HAPPENED i dont know IF ILL HAVE TO CONFIDENCE TO TALK TO HIM. EXT WEEK. I hope so he’s so nice.

Wow, this like the size of a fanfiction sorry abo that. I just really wanted to share.

That’s so nice that you’ve managed to connect with someone at college !! I think you should definitely try to have more confidence in yourself - you’re always so lovely so just let that shine through !! Be kind to yourself!

I absolutely feel you on not talking so much! I used to be so painfully shy in college (as in sixth form college, not uni) and I literally only hung around my partner at the time and like two others I already knew lol so I feel you on the friendship thing !!

It can be so hard especially if you’re second guessing yourself but I’m excited for you this interaction sounded really genuine and friendly! I think that’s the ultimate ice breaker though admitting something “embarrassing” and it seems to have worked! I’m really pleased for you! And I’m sure you can talk more next week, I have faith in you !! 💜💜💜

#long post #tw yoghurt #lol #ask #idjitlili #not buffy #don’t apologise love #!!#I’m happy to hear this it’s nice

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epicstuckyficrecs · 4 years

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Weekly Recap | March 9-22

Didn’t even realize but I completely forgot the recap for the week of March 9th to March 15th because I was too busy trying to find a flight home from Scotland (fuck coronavirus and bojo!!!) So now you get two weeks worth of fics!

Complete

good on my own (needed me) by mcwho (Modern AU, Teacher Bucky | 12K | Explicit): There are some mistakes that could be made by anybody. Anybody. Bucky taught high school pretty much his whole life, and that was fine, those were kids, and he knew all of them anyway, which meant there was very little chance of him accidentally fucking any of his students during an impulsive post-marital-breakdown Grindr hook-up. Which is exactly what he had done with Steve.

💙 The Conservation of a 17th Century Painting by birdjay/ @bird-jay (Modern AU, Artist Steve | 13K | Explicit): Well. He does live alone, and it’s not like anyone would find out. He could safely stick his hand down his pants right now and not have to worry about it. He’s jerked off loads of times in his own apartment. It’s...healthy to let stress out this way...right? And the fact that it’s to a doctor of art history isn’t weird. Or at least, not super weird. People have masturbated to weirder things. Steve knows that for sure. And it’s not like Dr. Barnes is rough on the eyes or anything, either. He’s quite possibly the most handsome man Steve’s looked at in months. And, well, there’s the whole art side to things, as well. (Part 1 of The Met: Art Conservation Studies)

Re-framing the Canvas by birdjay/ @bird-jay (Modern AU | 4K | Explicit): Steve and Dr. Barnes's first date. (Part 2 of The Met: Art Conservation Studies)

Perfectly Mad by ClaraxBarton/ @claraxbarton (PWP, Shrunkyclunks | 2,2K | Explicit): Whoever had decided to seat Steve beside Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes - eldest son of President Winifred Barnes, war hero, recently returned from a three month stay as a hostage of an offshoot of the same terrorist group that had once held Tony Stark - was clearly an idiot. Actually, in Steve’s opinion, whoever had thought Barnes attending the dinner at all was an idiot. Whoever had thought inviting Steve to the dinner was an idiot.

own me, i'll let you play the role (i'll be your animal) by voxofthevoid/ @voxofthevoid (Werewolf Steve, PWP | 6,7K | Explicit): He wanders into a clearing, the same one where he stood, almost three months ago, watching the Quinjet while waiting for Steve to come running to him. It was the start of something…educational. It’s one thing to take Steve as he is, another to love it the way Bucky did. He has no regrets. He’s been worse things than a monster-fucker. - Bucky’s not wearing red, but he’s got a big, bad wolf on his tail. (Part 3 of 💙in this story, you have claws)

i look like all you need by howdoyousleep/ @howdoyousleep3 (PWP, Daddy Bucky | 4,9K | Explicit): “Steve,” James starts, voice so low and so deep, a shiver running down Steve’s spine, “Baby, you can either come here and stand in front of me…or I’ll drag you by your fucking hair and put you there. Choose.” (Part 1 of Daddy James Bucky Barnes/Twink Steve)

i'm seein' the pain, seein' the pleasure by howdoyousleep/ @howdoyousleep3 (PWP, Daddy Bucky | 1,8K | Explicit): Steve had barely been able to keep up, gasping and trying to ask what James was doing, his thigh pulled up and hiked around a thick waist, a filthy roll of James’ hips. James had whispered low in his ear, “Wouldn’t be a good Daddy if I didn’t make sure my sweet boy got to bed…” (Part 2 of Daddy James Bucky Barnes/Twink Steve)

💙 No One Else by howdoyousleep/ @howdoyousleep3 (Sugar Daddy Steve | 12K | Explicit): And now here he is, walking up the steps to Steve’s brownstone at 12:03 in the morning on a Thursday night. He’s standing there like a fucking idiot with his tail between his legs, his hand coming up to ring the doorbell and falling back to his side maybe 8 times, and he lets out a shaky sigh. What if Steve wasn’t awake? Was this out of line? Showing up to his house in the middle of the fucking night? Fuck. (Part 1 of Modern Daddy Steve Rogers/Young Bucky Barnes)

Never Before by howdoyousleep/ @howdoyousleep3 (PWP | 5,6K | Explicit): Before Steve, Bucky enjoyed sex, engaging in it frequently with various partners, enjoying himself and the pleasure he could bring others. But when Steve came along his world was flipped upside-fucking-down. Bucky had never felt so desperate, so needy, so pathetic for someone. He had never once been brought to tears during sex or because of sex but Steve brought them out of him almost every time, whether it be from the sex itself or for begging for it. He had no idea what his body and what his mind were capable of during sex until he came along. It was like Bucky had never had sex before Steve entered his life. (Part 2 of Modern Daddy Steve Rogers/Young Bucky Barnes)

Slumber by howdoyousleep/ @howdoyousleep3 (PWP, Daddy Steve | 4,1K | Explicit): “Bucky, honey. Can’t get enough even when you’re sleepin’, huh?” (Part 3 of Modern Daddy Steve Rogers/Young Bucky Barnes)

Mad With It by howdoyousleep/ @howdoyousleep3 (PWP | 3,9K | Explicit): “Bucky, come here.” Fuck that. He doesn’t move. He doesn’t move and he finds himself gritting out, “Make me.” He knows he’s being a brat, knows he has been all damn day. He knows Steve is being as sweet as can be, trying to be supportive, but he can only take so much. (Part 5 of Modern Daddy Steve Rogers/Young Bucky Barnes)

Cyclone by howdoyousleep/ @howdoyousleep3 (PWP | 4,9K | Explicit): “Listen to those manners, baby, so good. You can have all of Daddy’s cock you want but you better fucking work for it.” (Part 6 of Modern Daddy Steve Rogers/Young Bucky Barnes)

Delirious by howdoyousleep/ @howdoyousleep3 (PWP | 2,8K | Explicit): “Fuck, honey you look so good takin’ it for me. That little cock has come twice already and look how hard it is for Daddy. Said you couldn’t come and look at you about to come all over my cock.” (Part 7 of Modern Daddy Steve Rogers/Young Bucky Barnes)

I Just Wanna Tell You Somethin' by howdoyousleep/ @howdoyousleep3 (PWP | 1,4K | Explicit): Bucky had been so preoccupied at the library studying with Natasha that he hadn’t even realized his phone had been ringing. Or that he had missed quite a handful of text messages. Luckily it was only one missed call, but his stomach clenched nervously when he saw that there was a voicemail. A long voicemail. (Part 8 of Modern Daddy Steve Rogers/Young Bucky Barnes)

Lately You've Been on my Mind by howdoyousleep/ @howdoyousleep3 (PWP | 1,8K | Explicit): As soon as Steve’s office door is closed behind him, he lets out an incredibly deep sigh, his tense shoulders slumping, his eyes falling shut. Meeting after meeting after meeting had consumed his day and most of them had unfortunately been arduous with difficult clients and a test of patience. Steve needed to go home for the weekend and it felt like he needed it more than he needed to breathe. He slips his phone from his pocket and immediately curses. He missed a call from Bucky. (Part 9 of Modern Daddy Steve Rogers/Young Bucky Barnes)

💙 Gym Day by howdoyousleep/ @howdoyousleep3 (PWP | 19K | Explicit): He sits up and rolls his neck, hands planted on either side of his hips on the wooden bench beneath him, focusing on his posture, and looks over at the man sitting with him. Oh shit. (Part 1 of Non-Serum Steve Rogers/Winter Solider Bucky Barnes| Shrinkyclinks)

Easy Like Sunday Mornin' by howdoyousleep/ @howdoyousleep3 (PWP | 3,2K | Explicit): Today is a Sunday and the universally-accepted laziness of the day may be why Steve finds himself wanting it slow and sweaty and deep. Bucky didn’t ask questions. (Part 2 of Non-Serum Steve Rogers/Winter Solider Bucky Barnes| Shrinkyclinks)

💙 Right in my Space by howdoyousleep/ @howdoyousleep3 (PWP | 9K | Explicit): Fuck. Steve’s head falls against the door with a gentle thump that he knows Bucky has to hear from the other side. Bucky was the absolute best and the absolute worst thing he could have seen on the other side of his door, especially with his slightly muddled red-wine-filled brain. He has worked so hard to avoid this moment, has hurt himself over and over again, and here he is feeling vulnerable standing at his door at midnight while the guy he definitely doesn’t want to date and definitely might not be in love with stands on the other side. (Part 3 of Non-Serum Steve Rogers/Winter Solider Bucky Barnes| Shrinkyclinks)

life is but a dream by howdoyousleep/ @howdoyousleep3 (PWP | 2,3K | Explicit): “Beg for it.” The phrase bounces around in Bucky’s brain like a pinball, off different sides, rolling around the curvature of his skull. His eyes are open, but his vision is a little hazy, can make out Steve’s slim backside as it hovers over Bucky’s angry erection, his amused but hot facial expression. Steve lets go of Bucky’s dick, smacks his hand down hard on his stomach instead, “Gone on me already, honey?” (Part 4 of Non-Serum Steve Rogers/Winter Solider Bucky Barnes| Shrinkyclinks)

Edging Closer by leveragehunters (Monkeygreen)/ @leveragehunters (Modern AU | 1,4K | Teen): Bucky had an apartment of his very own (okay, technically he co-owned it with the bank) and a neighbour of his very own: Steve Rogers, tall, blond, built and ridiculously kind. Sure, Bucky had accused said neighbour of being a butt-pic snapping pervert, but amazingly enough he'd been forgiven. In fact, he'd been more than forgiven, but even after dating Steve for not-quite-a-year, Bucky's eyebrows shot up when Steve dropped down next to him on the couch and casually asked, "Do you want to try edging this weekend?" (Part 2 of Two Men and a Single Entendre)

WIP

💙 Like it's the Only Thing I'll Ever Do by howdoyousleep/ @howdoyousleep3 (ABO AU | 3/4 | 22K | Explicit): When Steve opens the door, Bucky feels like he’s been living in clouds for the past few days, maybe even his entire life. Steve is life, Steve is happiness, Steve is the sun. He has such a visceral reaction to seeing the Alpha that he feels his knees go weak, feels his body draw tight towards the other man, pulled in. Or big Alpha Steve moves into sweet little Omega Bucky's apartment building and a roller-coaster build of a romance ensues.

💙 the reverie was not of me, you never saw nothing (so good for you and good for me) by voxofthevoid/ @voxofthevoid (Canon divergent | 2/? | 15K | Explicit): S.H.I.E.L.D and the Red Room throw Captain America and the Winter Soldier together for yet another mission. Serendipity is a tricky thing. (Part 2 of lay your heart into my perfect machine)

The Mnemosyne Project by onymousann (Post-WS | 2/? | 4,5K | Explicit): Someone's trying to talk to the Winter Soldier. Steve intends to find out who. (Part 2 of ocean eyes)

Paradise Lost (& Found) by JJK/ @trenchcoatsandtimetravel (Modern AU | 28/? | 62K | Mature): Meeting at a tropical resort AU where Steve is there on a 2-week honeymoon package after his fiancee left him at the altar, and Bucky is there for his sister’s destination wedding but doesn’t have a room because there was a mix up with the reservations in the system.

💙 Whip Crack by Quarra/ @quarra (Tentacles AU | 109K | 13/? | Explicit): Tentacle Monster Steve is captured by Hydra. They send in the Winter Soldier with a bull whip to break him, but as far as Steve's concerned the most beautiful creature he's ever seen walked in to his cell and started waving a sexy black tentacle at him. It's love at first sight.

Re-read

wild at heart by spacebuck/ @spacebuck (Shrunkyclunks, Soulmates AU | 11K | Explicit): Steve's volunteering when he meets his soulmate, and the cheetahs Bucky's responsible for make pretty good matchmakers, too.

#stucky #stucky fic #stucky fanfic #stucky fanfiction #stucky fic rec #weekly recap

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not-close-to-straight · 4 years

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Wednesday!

“Thank God the week is half over” I say, knowing full well I have long days at the office both Thursday and Friday and also have to work Saturday and Sunday to cater a birthday party. This has been the longest week ughhhhhh send help.

On a related note, I know the next chapter of LOST AND FOUND is late posting but it will be up tonight, and then another one this weekend so we stay on track! Our faves start getting close and it’s SO FUN.

If you emailed me last night about the STUCKONY WESTERN ABO post, I emailed you back, check your folders! I still haven’t decided how to work on that fic whether try and KoFi Pot it or just do it traditional commissions or put it away in the “to be written” folder for sometime in 2022 but don’t worry, at some point we WILL see Western Shenanigans from our favorite OT3.

Also emailed a few people back about COMMISSIONS so keep an eye out for those too. It’s still too early to set any ideas/dates in stone, but you’re more than welcome to put your name on a waiting list and work out a few general ideas with me! “[email protected]”

I updated GALLAVICH on Monday...(?) and it’s a great chapter, go check it out.

Be sure to keep an eye on the 2020 WRITING PLANS post because I update that anytime something changes in my line up/plans and that’s honestly the easiest way to keep up on it!

I hope everyone is doing okay with all the Covid stuff, I know in my state AZ it has gotten sort of insane again which is definitely stressing me the hell out, and I can’t imagine what it’s like for those of you closer to the hot-spots/big cities. Sending good vibes and positive thoughts and a reminder to wear your goddamn mask and social distance!

#ncts personal #fic updates #winteriron #stuckony #gallavich #commissions

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javierpenaspinkshirt · 4 years

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Dear Diary

Javi x Diarist - One Shot

Warnings: brief mention of some NSFW activities, mentions of tight jeans, some Carrillo thirst because I’m only human.

Words: 2.7k.

Summary: writing in her diary, the Diarist documents her first few weeks at her new job and her first encounters of Javi.

Day one - Monday

Dear Diary,

Today was the first day of my new job! Mom said I should keep a diary so I can look back when I’ve been in the job awhile and see how much I’ve progressed. To be honest with you, Diary, I feel a bit daft writing in you… but hey ho! Maybe you’ll be fun to look back on?

Anyway! Today was the first day of my new life in Bogotá! I’m a secretary for the DEA at the American Embassy in the city – the building is a bit posh! The university isn’t too far away so I can easily get to my evening classes (studying History with Spanish) and even though I’m classed as a ‘mature’ student (mature! HAH!) I’m hoping I’ll make friends both at class and at work… maybe someone with a car so they can drive me, teehee!

It’s a group of five girls working as secretaries for the DEA. We have a good age range and I sit sort of in the middle of the group age-wise I think. They’re all really lovely, there’s two other Americans and two Colombians so a cool culture mix. Hopefully they all like me!

I didn’t do much work today, just shadowing the others and walking round to meet everyone. The agents all seem to keep to themselves. There’s two Americans down the hall from my desk – I didn’t catch their names (whoops) but apparently they’re the two I’ll spend the most time working with. I should introduce myself properly tomorrow.

I’m looking forward to my first Tuesday on the job!

Day two - Tuesday

Dear Diary,

Today was day two. It was good, there’s a lot of information to learn and it’s especially difficult to flick between English and Spanish in my brain… But I guess I’m new to all this and I’ll get the hang of it! One of the other secretaries – Erica – has promised to speak to me mostly in Spanish so I can get into the habit of speaking like a local, I thought that was sweet of her!

But that wasn’t the most interesting thing to happen today, Diary, oh no no! Today I met Javier and Steve. They’re the two Americans I’ll be working for mostly. Steve is nice, barely speaks any Spanish which I can tell frustrates him and Javier, but just like me he’ll get there! I think I might end up his interpreter… but he seems kind and he is really into the job! He’s got a wife and they haven’t lived in Bogotá all that long either so we have that in common! Well… the being new here… not the wife bit(!)

And then there’s Javier, who all the other secretaries call Javi… so I guess I will too. I can tell he’s going to be trouble. He came up to my desk after lunch just to tell me that he liked my blouse and that the color suited me! I have to admit he is very handsome… But he strikes me as the ‘would ruin your life for a shag’ type? That might be harsh and he does seem nice. The others all say he’s lovely and is a man you can depend on but he is a dreadful flirt!

I wish I’d had something smart to say back to him as he stood in front of my desk telling me he liked my blouse but honestly, Diary, I think I just whimpered?? I was so taken aback by it! If there’s a next time I’ll have to be smarter!

Day 3 - Wednesday

Dear Diary,

This morning Javi bought me a coffee and brought it to my desk. He actually apologised for trying to flirt with me yesterday! He was very sweet actually. He said he wanted to make sure we got off on the right foot so wanted to apologise if he made me uncomfortable! I told him he didn’t I was just surprised he would even notice me! He was very sweet and said something like ‘I’d have to be blind not to notice you’… wait was he flirting with me again??

Diary, I am going to have to get better at this!

Day 4 - Thursday

Dear Diary,

I think we have a situation. I think I might have a teeny little crush on Javi. I mean, I am certainly not the only one! All the girls seem to melt slightly when he talks to them… Except Coleen actually… somehow she’s immune to his charms… Maybe she’ll teach me?

I caught myself actually waiting for him to come over to me today because I was looking forward to chatting to him. He always seems to make time to chat to us all and sees us as actual people… a lot more than most of the other staff.

He does wear some insanely tight jeans though. It's like it's 1985 and he thinks he's Axl Rose! But Javi does look good in them... like really good… Oh dear… I think I fancy a government agent. Who have I become??

Day 5 - Friday

Dear Diary,

That was my first week! Done and dusted! I think it was good! Everyone has been so kind and supportive and Erica has even invited me out for drinks tomorrow night with some of her friends! I cant wait!

School is going well too, I had my first classes this week and I think I’m going to be okay! The subject material isn’t going to be easy, but we like a challenge don’t we, Diary?

Now back to the important stuff – Javi’s outfit of the day. I was sat at my desk making some phone calls when Javi walks passed in a pair of those damn jeans and a red shirt. He caught my eye as he walked passed and gave me a smile and – I shit you not – my brain kicked in to gear and I said:

‘Nice shirt, the colour suits you’ and I was so cool and casual with a little smirk on my face, Diary I have never played anything so cool in my life. I got a chuckle from him and a wink and I swear down I would have taken my panties off right then and there.

Diary, my mom can never read you.

Day 6 - Saturday

Dear Diary,

It’s pretty late as a write this but that’s because I’ve been out with Erica and her friends! A couple of the other girls from work joined us as well so it was a lot of fun! We just went to a bar and had a few drinks and a giggle.

Erica did tell me she noticed me “making eyes” at Javi in the week though and I must’ve turned as red as the strawberry daiquiri I was drinking because she laughed at me. She told me he is, to quote her, ‘a bit of a slut’ and that most of the girls in the city know him in the biblical sense... I don’t think that put me off? I mean it’s the 80’s, do we still shame people for having sex? And to be fair, here I am making heart eyes at a man I’ve known for a matter of days. So no, Diary, I don’t judge him for that.

But I also don’t think I’m going to pursue him? I’m certainly not looking for a boyfriend. Although as I write this down I kind of figure he’s not after a commitment either? I mean I don’t know him that well but what kind of man shamelessly flirts with the new secretary on her first day if he isn’t looking for some fun? Maybe that’s what I’m looking for?

Diary, no more daiquiris for me!

Day 7 – Sunday

Dear Diary,

I went shopping today. Not the boring food type of shopping, clothes shopping! It was a lot of fun actually! I got to explore the city a bit and although it has a reputation (and my mom would kill me if she knew) I actually felt fine walking around on my own! I was in the busy shopping streets mind and it was daylight, but I really think this city could feel like home!

I bought a couple of pairs of jeans because mine are old and raggedy and I got some new shirts and tops for work, but the buy of the day – a pencil skirt that makes my butt look like I’ve done a 100 squats a day since the day I was born. I mean, not to blow my own horn, but I look GOOD in it!

I’m going to wear it to work one day… And yes Diary, I know I might be playing with fire, but a little fun never hurt anyone?

Day 8 - Monday

Dear Diary,

I wore the skirt.

Oh my! The girls all gave me compliments on my ass and legs (which lets be honest is better than any compliment from any man!) so that was great!

I’ll be honest though, by the end of the day I wanted to rip it off myself… I had severely underestimated how difficult sitting in a pencil skirt for 8 hours would be. Lesson learned!

I did see Javi though. He didn’t say anything but I was stood up as he walked passed and his eyes were stuck on me for so long Steve had to practically drag him up the stairs. Diary, I was very pleased with myself!

Day 9 - Tuesday

Dear Diary,

I don’t know what it is about the American Embassy but somehow the building attracts the most beautiful men.

Today, Diary, I met Colonel Horacio Carrillo and believe me I have never seen such a MAN! He must be 90% shoulder and 10% snark because Diary he is built like a wall and has a mouth sharp enough to even shut up Javier Peña! Not that I was listening in, I was collecting some papers in their office as the Colonel was talking to Javi and Steve.

Steve introduced me to the Colonel and he shook my hand (Diary, his hand was the SIZE OF MY HEAD)… he was wearing a wedding ring though. I’m no home wrecker… but my god is he beautiful!

I did catch Javi’s eye before I left their office though and I’m sure I’m not making it up when I say there was a flash of jealousy. I thought I was being crazy and arrogant to think that but no, I’m sure! The Colonel was very polite to me, very courteous, and were he not a married man I would have wished I was wearing my new skirt again. Diary, I can not stress enough the thickness of this man’s arms.

Anyway, despite definitely having the hots for the Colonel, I think I’d still rather go out with Javi. If we put the whole Carrillo-is-married thing aside, I just think Javi is more my kind of guy? Up for a laugh, not too serious, likes a drink and likes a smoke... very pretty!

I think we’d have a lot of fun if we went out. I’m beginning to wonder if he thinks the same?

Day 10 - Wednesday

Dear Diary,

Today the five of us girls went out for lunch. It was great! They showed me their favourite café, great for people watching but far enough from the embassy that we weren’t just looking at officials in suits! Great food too, I really do love this city!

I was sat with Coleen at lunch and she told me Javi had caught her after I’d left work for class and asked her about me. Apparently he asked if I was single!! Coleen told him she didn’t know because she didn’t want to drop me in it if I wasn’t interested in him (bless you, Coleen!) but I definitely am interested! Diary, when she told me he’d asked about me my heart raced! Like I’m some kind of school girl!

I really do like him and I’d like to get to know him better. But I think I’ll give it some more time maybe?

Day 11 - Thursday

Dear Diary,

I spent the whole day look at Javier Peña and his black fucking shirt. Oh my god, Diary! I am in too deep. He walked passed my desk while I was on the phone today and I stopped listening completely so I could concentrate on his butt.

It is becoming a problem.

So I have resolved to do something about it. I have decided that I’m going to ask him out for a drink tomorrow night after work. Fingers crossed for me!

Day 12 - Friday

Dear Diary,

Well… it’s sort of actually Saturday… I didn’t have time to write in you yesterday, Diary because… well because I didn’t come home last night (!)

Let me explain the events of last night:

When I got to work yesterday morning Javi was sat at my desk. He was wearing that damn leather jacket that, for no reason at all other than its his, I find incredibly sexy and was waiting for me. He said good morning to me then got up to let me sit down.

He watched me as I took stuff out of my bag and settled in before, seemingly out of nowhere, he asked me if I wanted to go for a drink with him after work!

Diary, I was so uncool. I was like one of those nodding dogs people have in their car or on their desk.

He laughed and said he’d come by my desk to get me when we were done. I spent the entire day obsessing about whether it was a date or just a friendly drink? Erica was sure it was a date, so sure in fact she made me borrow her red lipstick and made me promise to wear it.

I did wear it. And was I glad I did!

He complimented me on it when he came by my desk to get me. As we left the building he put his arm out for me and we linked arms and walked down the street and Diary it was the easiest, loveliest conversation I’ve ever had! He made me feel so at ease straight away, it was sort of like I’d known him for ages?

We actually ended up at the same bar I’d been to the weekend before… so I was back on the daiquiris!

We talked for ages, right up until closing but it was still like there was so much more to say! When we eventually got turfed out of the bar we ended up walking the streets, arm in arm again, laughing and chatting. Diary, it was lovely!

Turns out he only lives a few blocks away from my place but his is closer to the bar. We stopped at his door and he invited me up. I’ll be honest, I hesitated… but I was wearing his leather jacket (he’d let me wear it for the walk home) and he’d been such a gentleman, well I couldn’t resist the smile on his face!

So I ended up sat on his sofa as he told me about work and fixed me a whiskey… I don’t know what possessed me but when he came over to give me my glass I stood up and kissed him!

Diary, you know me, I’ve never been particularly forward! I blame those daiquiris… but oh no, it didn’t end at a kiss.

Before I knew it we were pulling each other's clothes off (I didn't even mind that he ripped one of my new tops)! I don't know if it's because he's well practised or he's just one of those guys that knows what he's doing... but lord did he know what he was doing!

Before I knew it he had me on my back on his sofa, screaming his name and Diary… well what can I say… I’ve had to write this all down quickly because I’ve just come home to shower and get a change of clothes before he comes to pick me up. That’s right, we’re going out again tonight!!

Diary, don’t wait up!

#javier peña x reader #javier peña fic #javier peña fanfic #javier peña x you #narcos fanfic #narcos fanfiction #javier peña #javi x reader #javi x you #javi #narcos

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doof-doofblog · 3 years

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"Right!"

Friday 11th December 2020

Hello again everyone! Hope you've all had a good weekend. I apologise this post is late, I feel over the weekend the news about Barbara Windsor's death got me more than I had expected and I just didn't feel up to writing anything, also working 2 jobs as well can get in the way of writing this blog. But I'm now going to focus on getting this blog up to date. Hopefully come Thursday this week, I will all up to date with the blog and EastEnders. Thank you all for your on-going support and patience.

So let's jump into the episode - oh my it was another jam packed one wasn't it! Firstly, I just want mention Bobby and what such a brilliant actor Clay Milner Russell is! The beginning of the episode I found really intriguing. Bobby stood in the police station, waiting to be questioned, he is absolutely convinced that he's to blame for his Father's attack. At first you seem to think it really was him - he confesses by basically saying that it's his fault that his Dad got attacked. However as Jack continues to question him, it becomes aware that Bobby truly isn't the one to blame for the attack on his Dad. I don't know whether it has something to do with his mental health or OCD or religion, but he truly believes that because he didn't count the correct amount of numbers, he's to blame for his Dad's attack. I can't applaud Clay Milner Russell enough, having to come into a new role (even though he's been in the soap for a while now) without having any previous acting jobs, and to have been given such a gripping storyline - it's pretty impressive I have to say! I think it's easy to say that Bobby can be cleared a suspect, as it's come to clear to us a viewers and to Jack, being a police officer, Bobby is mentally unwell and maybe needs to be assessed, why does he think he's to blame? Just because he's gotten into a ritual of counting and he firmly believes that if he counts to a certain number, everything will be okay. It must be his OCD making him believe it? I hope he'll eventually get the help he needs as it's quite clear he needs it.

The second thing I want to mention is Rainie!! She's finally returned to the Square after disappearing for about 48 hours (or maybe more)! Her poor husband has been going out his mind with worry, leaving her countless phone calls and text messages, you can understand his relief when he's finally reunited with her. However it's not long before a police officer approaches them and inform them they're needed at the station for questioning. Firstly, Rainie appears to have no idea what has happened on the Square in her absence, she appears to be shocked after hearing the news about Ian. Only the interesting thing is, later on in the episode, she's on her own walking to the Cafe, when Callum spots her and hurries to have a word with her. When they're sat together and Callum is asking her all sorts of questions, it becomes clear that she's knows more than what she's letting on. She informs her Brother-In-Law that she told the police that during the night Ian was attacked, she was in fact at home with her husband watching Deal Or No Deal - (Is that even still on TV?!). But when Callum asks her further questions she responds with "No Comment!" - as if she doesn't want to give out any more information, or maybe to hide the fact that she does know something? Later on in the episode, Rainie appears to have cleaned herself up and had a wash as Stuart returns home from the police station. Rainie starts to beg forgiveness from her husband after leaving him in the lurch the way she did, and also not responding to his messages, I think we can all tell that she simply hasn't been with her Mum's - had she been sleeping rough? Or maybe gone to a hostel of some kind? Her face is in complete worry and concern as she panics her husband might've thrown her under the bus. Stuart softly questions her statement to the police, about them being home together, she nods tearfully. He then drops the bomb that he in fact gave the police the exact same statement - he was at home with his wife watching Deal Or No Deal! They both jump for joy in unison as they believe that they're alibi's are clear and that they've helped each other.

This episode seems to be all about alibi's doesn't it? Another person who's fretting about their alibi is Max. After pleading Linda to tell the police that they were together on the night in question, he seems to be having second thoughts? He visits her at the laundrette and she informs him that she told Jack that Max with with her. However, Max reveals the one thing that we didn't know earlier, that they didn't spend the whole night together, just part of it. So in all fairness, what did he do for the rest of the night? Where did go? Who did he see? As much as he seems grateful to Linda for giving him the alibi, later he informs his brother Jack, not to listen to a word she has said. It's quite interesting that he's chosen not to accept her alibi, as Jack states, the whole entire Square will be pointing at him and questioning him! Max admits that he can live with being looked at and gossiped about. Part of me is thinking is he doing this for Linda?! Is he doing it for her sake as he doesn't want to be the reason for her and Mick to call an end to their marriage?! It is an interesting one - why would Max not snatch up the alibi whilst he can? Or is he really a proud man and is certain that he has nothing to hide - so why would he need one? I don't know, I am simply guessing at this point. I'm just simply giving out my thoughts on what Max could be thinking.

Meanwhile, whilst all this is going on in the Square, sweet Honey has come up with an idea to hold a community Christmas dinner for those who have very little on Christmas Day. After what happened with her son, Will, shoplifting for his poor friend, she feels that maybe this should be the time when everyone rallies round together and help the community. She pulls in Jay and Isaac to help and even Billy agrees to help by asking Max if they could use the restaurant as a venue. I think this is a lovely idea and it seems only perfect for Honey to be the one behind it, as Jay explains she can cook and she seems to be the only one who cares. If this community Christmas Dinner takes place, it'll be very interesting to see on Christmas Day, that's for sure. Either way I'm looking forward to seeing it come together and have Honey be right in the centre of it, as she well deserves to be after what she's recently been through! Could this Christmas Dinner in fact be the start of her blossoming romance with Jay? (Yes! I'm still convinced it's going to happen - sooner or later!)

Looks like there are still people who are still needing an alibi, specifically Tina and Ben. Even though Tina admitted to hitting Ian, the main thing is is that their encounter happened at the Beale household and not the Vic. After being questioned, it was revealed that Tina went straight home after her punch up with Ian and the only person who will be able to vouch for her for would be a pizza delivery boy who delivered pizza to the wrong house. Since then, Tina has been trying to track down the pizza boy but to no avail. She spots Jack on the Square and asks him about Ian's condition, which we then find out is that he survived his operation, much to her relief. However it's then that Jack states that Ian isn't out of the woods yet, plus the main fact is, if Tina can't find the pizza boy for give her the alibi she so desperately needs, she will remain a suspect. Whereas Ben's story hasn't been mentioned yet - as far as we're concerned, no one knows when Ben was when Ian got attacked, the only thing that's known for sure, is that Ben did leave the pub that night - but did anyone see him? Will anyone really be able to give him an alibi? Callum perhaps? If it comes to it that Ben doesn't have an alibi, will Callum fight for his boyfriend and possibly give him a false one? Who knows? Things still yet remain to be seen when it comes to Ben, what do you think?!

Does anyone else think Sharon is acting very shifty?! Since agreeing to marry Ian, I am so convinced that she has something to do with Ian's attack - or maybe she knows more than what she's letting on. the thing that really stood out for me was when she and Kathy were talking to Ian just before he was due to go in for surgery. She happened to mention something along the lines of "I'm waiting for my wedding ring!" - what a thing to say just as someone is about to go into theatre! The thing that pops into my head as soon as she says that, is that as soon as she gets the ring on her finger, she'll basically own half of what Ian has - I'm guessing. I am still SO convinced that she's learned the truth about Ian's involvement in Dennis's death, that she is definitely out for revenge. If killing him hadn't worked, she will go to the next best thing and take him for everything that he's got! Even later on the in episode, Kathy questions whether Sharon will have their marriage annulled, as everyone knows she doesn't love him the way he loves her. However, interestingly, Sharon admits to Kathy that after seeing Ian pleading to her to marry him, she explains that it's become clear how much they need each other, and especially him during this tough time he's having. For her it's not a case of she won't annul the marriage, but she can't. In all seriousness - what's the difference?! Or am I just missing something? Don't you guys agree though? Why on Earth would she marry her best friend after just a few weeks prior to rejecting him?! She must be out for revenge or something?!

Right so, the Panesar's are also looking shifty! On the Square, it looks as if a van has some interesting with regards to Ian's attack. Kheerat is walking along the street as he watches with great suspense at the police investigating the vehicle. However it's only later on when Jack visits the shop to question both Suki and Kheerat about their whereabouts on the night in question, Suki reveals that she was at Ruby's club. Which, I guess is try - as we saw she was sat at the bar, but how long was she there for? Could she and Kheerat have cooked up the plan to attack Ian together?! However, when Jack takes an interest in Kheerat's whereabouts, Kheerat reveals that he wasn't even on the Square at the time of the attack and just happened to be out of time in a meeting. But then, to his surprise, Jack questions the vehicle in which he drove to the business meeting and whether there was some kind of accident. He then drops the bombshell that the van has been taken for testing as there had traces of blood found on the vehicle. Instantly you can see Suki and Kheerat have a panicked look in their faces, as Jack leaves the scene, Suki seems to lay into her son about being careful, however Kheerat informs his Mother not worry as he will sort it. Later on in the episode, we see a hooded figure enter some type of building after entering it in some kind of alley way. As Kheerat enters his office we see a hooded figure sat in a chair waiting for him, he mentions to the unknown figure that the police are sniffing round and asking them dodgy questions. Suddenly the figure removes his hood and we see that it's actually Peter!!! He asks why the police would go the Minute Mart, but as their conversation continues it looks as if Peter and Kheerat are more involved together as they are in the attack than we first believed. They agree to give each other alibis!

So what the heck does this mean?! The only thing I can think of is that both Peter and Kheerat had it out for Ian and they both went to the Vic for the same reason, but maybe things got out of hand and one witnessed the other attacking Ian? I'm unsure. I don't think they would've planned anything together, I do think they crossed paths purely by accident and because of their mistakes of getting caught, they basically have no choice but to give each other an alibi. So - who do I think attacked Ian?! Sharon, Peter and Max are on the top of my list. However I could be wrong, as we still yet to hear/see Ben's encounter of the evening. My opinion could change over the coming episodes, I do not however, think it was either Bobby or Tina - I feel I can positively rule them out! I'm feeling a little unsure when it comes to Stuart and Rainie, I'd like to think it's not either of them, but like I said - who knows? My views could change.

Do you guys have any thoughts or theories as to who could be Ian's attacker?! I'd love to hear your thoughts and opinions! Please feel free to leave me a comment or message I'll always find the time to respond. Enjoy the rest of your evening folks and I'll be back again tomorrow evening! Love you all xXx

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jasontoddiefor · 5 years

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Title: Death shall not rest on my doorstep

Summary: Bruce dies and suddenly Gotham, previously claimed by the Omega, is without a ruler. And Jason hadn’t planned to do anything about it, but-

AN: Written for @thursday-batfam-prompts ABO! Because I like non-traditional A/B/O AU’s so this is NOT CREEPY. I repeat: NOTHING CREEPY!

In-between all the vigilante occupied cities, Gotham had always been the odd one out. Not simply because none of its heroes were aliens or meta-humans of any kind, but because it was a claimed territory.

If you passed Gotham city borders, you entered the home of the Bat. It made outsiders vary. They weren’t used to the omnipresent feeling of darkness waiting to wrap them in its shadow. They thought of it as unnatural, gross, and downright frightening. For those who called Gotham home, the Bat’s presence was the sweet reassurance that someone would be there for you at the end of the day. Whether it was to welcome you to the gates of hell or heaven’s feather-light embrace, nobody knew. It was the reason nobody ever truly left Gotham. After years of living under someone’s protection, it was hard to move to another place.

During his training, Jason had spent a couple weeks in Bialya, first tracking down a teacher, then learning under them. While the country wasn’t a place Jason had wanted to spend more time in than necessary, Bialya was also one of the few claimed territories still left in the world. Its ruling Omega Queen Bee couldn’t be further from Bruce, but the weight that came from being in claimed lands had been comforting on Jason’s shoulder.

He had never known what it was like to live in free land. Jason had been a toddler still when Batman had started his crusade. He couldn’t even recall what the city’s scent had been before the Omega had torn through the streets, declaring it his city to nourish and cherish. In the course of one night Gotham’s fate had changed.

And now its direction had turned once more.

Jason knew that there was a difference between death and absence. He was the best example of what either did to you. Absence was breathing in and remembering the taste of something you were missing dearly. Death was defined by taking a breath, choking on glass, and wondering how you could ever lose something as precious as your heart.

Gotham was grieving, had been since Bruce had died - or disappeared if you were to believe the words of an equally destroyed teenager. Jason almost felt sorry for Tim. First, another little Beta disturbed the careful balance of Gotham’s vigilante pack, then their parent and guide died, and finally Dick proved incapable of putting his foot down properly, effectively pushing Tim out.

And meanwhile, Gotham was still in tears. Sure, there was a new Bat on the streets who could hit just as hard as the old one, but in the end, Dick was a Beta and couldn’t claim a territory. It was almost ironic that Crime Alley, Jason’s region, was the most stable one. Its people missed the Bat – How could they not when it had such a much more merciful chokehold than the Red Hood? – but at least its borders were still defined every night.

Jason stretched his arms above his head. It was time to get going, least of all some other second-rate Omega thought he could take what belonged to Jason. As he made his way across the rooftops, Jason stopped once in a while just to turn west and stare. The rest of Gotham whispered sweetly, begging for its Knight in shining armor or, perhaps as Jason used to dream so long ago, for a Robin who had spread his wings.

Bruce gave him a promise ages ago when the streets Jason walked hadn’t run red with his own blood yet.

Nightwing had made his home in Blüdhaven then, barely even a member of their pack, and Batgirl had sought new heights to explore. There had been no other children tearing at Bruce’s cape for attention, whether that was in form of an angry blonde Alpha, another silent Omega or two Beta Robins.

Jason had been a son then, the only other Omega. It had been logical that he’d become the next Bat and inherit Gotham. His eyes had been so wide when Bruce promised him this city, so full of disbelief.

The child that had died had been right to question it. Crime Alley was all of Gotham that ever should belong to Jason, to the Red Hood. The rest was the home of the Bat and a naïve, hopeful Robin dreaming of the future.

Red Hood couldn’t care for a city. His job was to keep it contained.

Jason’s attention spiked when he felt a disturbance two blocks further down. The Bat was halfway across the city, but he could tell that the newest Robin was interrupting on the edge of Jason’s territory. Jason wasn’t really able to pinpoint Damian’s scent. He was a child still, smelling more like a mix of his parents than himself. But Jason was more than familiar what Robin’s scent should be. Before they were even allowed outside, Bruce had taught them how to divide themselves.

This was who you were at home.

(Old books, oil, hot chocolate, lemonade tarts)

This was who the media got to see.

(Ink, money, gold, summer)

And this was who you will be on patrol.

(Hope, streets, laughter, the Bat)

Robin was supposed to be attuned to the Bat. Jason had buried that part of himself deep beneath the anger, blood, birth and decay of the Pit. Damian, however, still smelled like the Bat. Like a Bat who was out of his depth and should have stopped hanging onto Daddy’s legacy when he left this city the first time, but a Bat nevertheless.

What was the little brat doing here? There was no reason-

Oh.

Jason bit on his tongue until it bled. It was a bad habit he hadn’t been able to unlearn even after all the terrible lessons his silence had taught him already.

Someone was trying to lay claim on Gotham, or at least a part of Gotham.

Jason shouldn’t care.

He had his part of town, the rest was up for grabs since Jason distinctly hadn’t claimed it and yet-

It had been supposed to be his years ago. When he still recalled how to not only be the danger waiting to snap your neck but the person you ran to for help. The kids on the street came to him, they recognized his slang and knew he was one of their own – but therein laid the problem. Robin hadn’t been one of them. Robin was theirs, body, soul, mind. If you misbehaved, you’d get hurt, that was given. Batman and Robin wouldn’t be effective if they just gave stern talks. The reassurance that despite everything, you wouldn’t die on the cold and dirty asphalt though, was enough to trust Robin above Red Hood every day. As long as Batman had been there, Jason hadn’t needed anyone to trust him.

But now the difference of Bruce’s disappearance managed to tear a rift the size of the Grand Canyon in-between him and everyone else.

Jason hurried to his bike and raced to Damian. He wanted to see which idiot thought he could trouble the most lethal Robin to date yet and dare to claim his father’s city right in front of him. Jason was halfway there when he recognized the intruder.

Victor Zsasz.

Fuck. Jason hadn’t even known the serial killer had escaped from Arkham.

He was already driving way above the speed limit, the few miles more he pushed for shouldn’t matter. When he arrived at the scene, Jason first scanned the situation. Zsasz was armed, Robin didn’t have his belt, and a couple kids were standing behind Robin’s back. Oh great, civilians. Last thing Jason needed tonight. As soon as he jumped off his bike, even before feet touched the ground, Jason threw a smoke bomb in Zsasz’s direction.

“What the hell-?”

While Zsasz was distracted, Jason ran for Damian’s belt lying on the ground.

“Don’t let anyone ever take this from you,” he hissed as he threw it in Damian’s hands. “You lose the belt, battle’s already looking worse.”

Then Jason turned to the kids. “You, scramble. You don’t want to see this.”

They didn’t have to be told twice and rushed off in the opposite direction, disappearing into another street.

“I had it under control!” Damian lied, so Jason didn’t even bother with a reply.

The smoke cleared up and Zsasz didn’t wait for even a second to jump Jason. The serial killer was dangerous, but he had nothing on the teachers Jason had trained under. Jason grabbed Zsasz’s outstretched arm, breaking his wrist as he took the man’s knife away and used his speed against him to throw him on the ground. He crashed harshly against the asphalt, but that wasn’t enough to stop him from trying to kick Jason’s legs away.

Out of the corner of his eye, Jason could see Damian reaching for his batarangs and no. The last thing he needed was more knives in Zsasz’s reach. Instead, Jason let himself be caught and crashed onto the attacker’s back with his knees.

“So you get out of Arkham and the first thing you do is try to claim Gotham,” Jason said. “You’re not really that stupid, are you?”

Zsasz growled and tried to shake Jason off.

“Nobody’s taken Gotham yet!” Zsasz shouted. “The Bat is dead. Has been for weeks now. We all know it! I’m just the first to try to do something about it.”

“And you think you deserve Gotham? You think you’re strong enough to keep this city under your thumb? Don’t make me laugh.”

Zsasz’s face turned into a torn impression of a snarl and he tried to push himself up again, but Jason stopped him by putting pressure on his broken hand. Zsasz hissed and reached for Jason’s leg with his other hand, digging his nails into the armor.

“Don’t act so high and mighty now, little Red Riding Hood, you didn’t do anything either! You’re weak and scared. Barely brave enough to stick to Crime Alley like the trash you are- urgh.”

Jason dunked Zsasz’s face in the ground, but that didn’t stop him. He just kept talking and talking, cutting into Jason’s skin with his words just as well as he would with a knife.

“All dressed up with a Bat across your chest, but we all know you’re not really a part of their pack. You just take like the rest of us. Take, take, take and cut this city into pieces, but you don’t try to fix anything at all.”

“Shut up.”

He didn’t need to hear it, he didn’t want to listen to it anymore. All Zsasz should do now was keep silent and stay down like the scum he was.

“What? Little red afraid to hear the truth?”

“I said, shut up!”

Zsasz kept grinning despite lying on the ground defeated. Jason only had to put a bullet into his head and it would be all over. It would show him what happened when you messed with the Red Hood and tried to take what didn’t belong to you. Jason should claim Gotham to keep all the monsters away from ever touching this city again. Jason should let them rot in the same depth of anger and decay as him.

Them and the rest of the city.

He couldn’t do that to everyone. The rogues of this city, the ugly creatures of terrible massacres deserved to drown in the worst of Jason’s self. But the kids spraying Batman murals and Robin Rs should grow up in a better place.

“Speechless, Red?”

“You,” Jason said and injected Zsasz’s with a sedative. “Talk too much.”

Slowly he stood up. Tomorrow, maybe, Jason would regret it. The Pit would scream at him, and he’d wake up wondering how he could ever let the broken little Robin spread his wings again. But right now Jason was angry. Gotham was his city. The city they had sweat, bled and died for. The hell would he let anybody else take it from them.

No matter what you did, you couldn’t forget Robin. It was almost a little too easy to open up the cage he’d put the kid in and let hope, laughter and the Bat wash over him, effectively switching places with the scent of the Pit.

Zsasz’s eyes went wide, he looked up to Jason as if he saw a ghost. Jason licked his lips.

“Y-you’re dead!” The man screeched. “The Joker killed you! How is your scent like the dead second’s?”

Jason’s shoulders tremored. He wanted to cry, but instead, a pitiful laugh escaped him. He grinned, bright and just on the edge of unsettling.

“He did,” Jason said. “He took a crowbar to my head and didn’t stop until only heaven could have saved me, and it didn’t care. But do you know who cares? Do you know who wanted me back?”

Zsasz tried to push himself to his feet again, only to stumble and fall again in a fit of hysterics. Jason stepped on the man’s back, pushing him down.

“I said, do you know?”

The man sobbed and shook his head. With his hands, he tried to protect his face. Jason could feel Damian’s eyes on his back. He wondered if the kid had ever gotten to see Bruce like this.

“Gotham did. She called me back to keep this city from falling. So listen well and tell all your buddies: This city is mine. It always was, it always will. The Bat gave it to me and if you want it, feel free to knock on our signal and we will answer.”

“W-we?”

“The Bat, Robin, me and all your worst nightmares.”

Before Zsasz could say another word or continue with his freak-out, Jason hit him at the back of his neck, knocking him out. Zsasz deserved death. All of Gotham would be better off with him dead in a ditch six-feet-under.

But murder was hardly the first thing Jason should do after taking Gotham, if it was something he could afford to do at all.

In the distance, Jason could already hear the police sirens.

“C’mon, Robin,” Jason told his Robin.

His.

It hadn’t even been minutes and Jason was already getting protective. He could already feel the headache coming. Was this how Bruce had always felt day in and day out? No wonder that Betas were usually the organizers in charge of keeping everything else running and Alphas were sent to defend their land. Jason had a hard time recalling a moment he had ever felt as cheerful and nauseous as right now.

But maybe his suffering would be short. Dick would kill him as soon as he got to them. Even if Jason would still have to walk Gotham’s borders at least once to finalize his claim, but Dick would be able to tell right away that this particular Robin had laid claim on the city.

He’d shout and accuse Jason of trying to be Batman, except Jason really wasn’t. The man he had grown up to be couldn’t be Batman.

But he still remembered how to be Robin. To look like he belonged in any street, crack a joke for the crying children and give them hope, and linger in the shadow of the Bat and support him.

Their city, their pack, didn’t need Red Hood to spread the fear right now. He could do this when their runaway Batgirl returned to be this pack’s Omega.

Right now, though, they only had Jason, and there was a particular responsibility that came from caring for a city. Mainly, that you had to love all of it. Every corner, every flaw.

And Jason could do it.

“Todd, what are you doing!? How dare you put your filthy scent on Father’s city!”

Damian had finally found his voice again it appeared.

“I’m putting a claim on our city. And I smell just like you, brat.”

“This isn’t yours-“

“Then whose is it?” Jason interrupted the squirt. “Zsasz is right. B is dead and everybody knows it. Unless this pack got another member with the ability to claim territory lying around, be my guest and let them take all of Gotham. Until then, Gotham will be dealing with me. Don’t worry, I’ll stick to your rules. Now, are you coming or not?”

Another second passed, then Damian got onto Jason’s bike.

“Did B ever take you ‘round the city and showed you how to do proper claiming?”

Jason could feel Damian shake his head.

“Then I’ll do it. The most important part is the visualization. If you don’t know how your home looks, you can’t draw proper borders. You know how Batman forces you to memorize maps before you go out? Imagine that but a hundred times worse. Every day he’d have me learn each street and then go about practicing it. I swear, the first time I managed to make a part of the Batcave mine, it was the most exhausting thing I’ve ever done.”

They covered all the bridges, kept driving until the sun was rising again and the newspapers began to shred each other apart trying to explain that it was their dear second Robin who had taken over for Batman. Jason enjoyed the silence of the drive. He and Dick would scream at each other long and loud enough once they returned to the Cave.

#jason todd #bruce wayne #damian wayne #dc #dc comics #batman #fanfic #idk what I'm doing with my life

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schweeeppess · 5 years

Note

Baby Jason gets into a fight at school, but he calls Dick to come pick him up because he doesn’t want Alfred or Bruce to know and throw him out

tip that this is platonic, no-sex, abo for those of you who prefer not to read it! I’ll put the fic under cut even if it’s not long for you guys ^^

Walking down the halls of Gotham Academy slaps Dick across the face with nostalgia. He feels like a kid again, heading to the dean’s office because he got in a fight with some other kids because they called him and his family gypsy trash again.

But he’s not here for himself, he remembers as he steps into the office and is greeted with the scents of frustrated pup and irritated alpha. He’s here for Jason.

“Mr. Grayson,” the dean greets cooly, glaring at him through her rectangular-framed glasses. “Please, have a seat.”

Dick nods and sits down next to Jason, the kid’s scent flashing with surprise he tries to mask. He didn’t think Dick would show up, did he?

Dick didn’t think he’d show up either.

“Hey, Jason,” he greets, placing a hand on his little brother’s shoulder and looking at him. “Got held up in traffic.”

Jason blinks. “Uh. S’okay, Dickie.”

Nodding once, Dick turns to the dean again, and says, “I understand I’m here to pick my brother up because he got in a fight?”

“You’re correct.”

Again, Dick nods, fighting down the irritation he can feel rising in his chest. He’s an omega, and that’s the only reason he isn’t getting the whole story already. An alpha would have been informed and out the door by this point. Dick has to pry information away from the dean’s hands if he wants to know anything.

He looks back to Jason, asks the alpha pup, “What happened?”

“Mr. Grayson, I don’t think–”

Dick glares sharply over at the dean, effectively shutting her up. “I was asking my brother a question, ma’am, and I’d appreciate it if you’d let him answer.”

They glare at each other for a few seconds, but Dick ranks above her even as an omega. He’s the primary pack omega for the Waynes, which gives him more authority than she as a single alpha has. Nevermind that fact that he’s a Wayne on paper, period.

She looks to her computer, an unofficial submission but a submission all the same, and Dick looks back to Jason.

Jason looks stunned, but speaks when Dick nudges him a little.

“Uh, they made fun’a my accent, but I didn’ care. So they started makin’ fun’a Bruce, an’ you, an’…” Jason trailed off, looking down at his blood-streaked hands, kicking his feet a little. “An’ then they called mom names…I didn’ wanna fight ‘em! I didn’t!”

A wave of sadness hit Dick in the chest, and he pulls Jason into his side, hugging the little pup close. There’s the sharp sting of pain and a touch of despair in Jason’s scent, and he buries his face into Dick’s shirt. Dick does his best to help Jason, letting calming pheromones seep into his scent, and it seems to work as Jason relaxes in Dick’s embrace.

Dick looks to the dean, who watches with tight-lipped stubbornness, and asks, “You knew about this?”

“No, Mr. Grayson, I didn’t,” she admits with a small sigh, pinching the bridge of her nose.

“Did you bother asking?” He knows that answer, too.

“No.”

“I see.” Dick stands, Jason shuffling to his feet beside him, face still buried in his side and body slightly behind Dick’s. “Ma’am, with all due respect, I’ll be taking my little brother and leaving, now. He’ll be back in school tomorrow, and his bullies will be the ones punished.”

The dean raises a brow, crossing her arms. “Oh, is that so?”

“It is,” Dick easily replies, narrowing his eyes. “Jason didn’t do anything wrong. He was defending himself.”

“He broke Ryker’s nose–”

“Because Ryker wanted to get a rise out of him, and verbally abused him.”

“That–”

“Matters, and is actually a felony.” Dick raises one of his own eyebrows. “Would you prefer we discuss this with Bruce?”

The dean goes silent for a minute before speaking again.

“Mr. Todd may return to school on Thursday.”

A two-day suspension, then. It was better than nothing.

Dick nods, grabs Jason’s hand, and leaves, without another word.

When they’re driving for the Manor, Dick glances over at Jason in the rear-view mirror, a question on he tip of his tongue.

“Hey, Jason?”

The kid looks over.

“Why’d you call for me to pick you up?” The question’s been on the forefront of Dick’s mind, and has been ever since he’d gotten the phone call.

Dick looks back to the road while he waits for Jason’s answer, content with the brief silence.

“…don’ want B t’throw me out.”

Dick snorts. “You think Bruce will throw you out because you got in a fight?”

Jason huffs indingnantly.

“I got into fights when I was a kid too, Jay.”

“No way.”

Dick nods, stopping at a red light and looking at Jason in the mirror again. “Way. Why do you think the dean doesn’t like me?”

Jason gapes, and Dick laughs.

“I can promise Bruce won’t throw you out, Jason. He’ll probably do what I just did, but, like, somehow better. Because he’s Bruce.”

The light turns green and Dick looks back to the road, which means looking away from Jason and being unable to see his face as he says, “Yeah, but m’jus’ some street rat he picked up.”

“And I’m a Roma kid from the circuis.” Dick rolls his eyes. “I don’t see your point, Jason.”

Jason sighs. “Whatever. If you’re sure B won’ throw me out, can ya at least stay a bit?”

Dick shrugs.

“Sure.”

#ask #workingchemistry #mutual #treasured mutual #abo fic #abo #prompt #writing prompt #i hope this was semi-good at least?#dhfgisl #Omega Dick Grayson #Alpha Jason Todd #ummmm slight rank prejudice #idk what else to tag

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workingchemistry · 4 years

Note

Hi! do you follow an update schedule when it comes to your stories or is it more of when the inspiration hits or when your worm load gives you time to write? Just love your stories and frequently check ao3 to see if you've updated. pretty sure I subscribe but I never check the email my ao3 account is attached to haha. Premature Happy New Years! ✌🏻👍🏻

You’re so so sweet. >.<

I used to have an update schedule! During the summer I posted on saturdays and the semesters were Thursdays. Lately it’s just been whenever I found the energy to finish things up. This last semester was about the worst three months I’ve had in the past six/seven years.

I want to get back to a schedule this year. I’ll probably stick with Thursdays bc I don’t have class that day. I’ve got the next chapter of May I, Protect Your Heart, and Good for Goodness all halfway done. I’m also halfway through the first chapter of a new ABO AU featuring Joyfire in a non explicit harem. And then I’m also about halfway-ish on two oneshots. I’m just feeling really burned out from work so I haven’t had a chance to work on them. (Work keeps scheduling three and four of us at a time and we’ve been slammed so I can’t sneak sentences here and there anymore on my phone)

The plan is to get those all finished and then be able to post once a week again. I’m afraid that I can make no promises tho.

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kutekasplon · 5 years

Text

Just A Little Sugar (1/?)

A/N: Okay, so here is the sugar daddy AU that I’ve been talking about. I would Like to thank @honeybeehanlon for betaing this chapter for me, I am so thankful for her. I hope you guys enjoy this.

Paring: Stan x Mike

Warning: It’s a sugar daddy as Idk what to tell there might be NSFW but as of now there is not. Stan is 20 and Mike is 26

Word count: 1571

Edited: Yes

Read on ao3 here

Signing up for a sugar daddy app was not how Stan saw himself spending his Friday night. Usually, he would be sitting on his couch with a glass of wine and book trying to relax, and not think about the stress of paying for college and keeping his small apartment. Working two jobs and going to school full time was strenuous. Each week it seemed that more and more assignments piled up, and Stan was becoming sleep deprived and drained. He didn’t realize how tired he was until Thursday, while he was studying at Eddie’s, or for better saying, sleeping at Eddie’s.

Eddie had left to use the bathroom, and when he walked back into his room five minutes later Stan was asleep on his with his face in the textbook. Eddie lightly tapped him on the shoulder and watched as Stan jumped from his sleep. Disoriented, he looked around, seeming to calm when he met Eddie’s eyes.

“Stan this is getting fucking ridiculous,” Eddie sighed with exasperation. His hands were on his hips and he was giving Stan a concerned look.

“What are you talking abo-,” his words were cut off by the big yawn that left his mouth.

“You really have to ask,” Eddie frowned, “Every time I see you, you look dead, and during our study sessions you spend most of the time sleeping instead of actually studying. You’re making me worried.”

“It’s nothing I can’t handle, just work,” another yawn l his mouth.

Shaking his head Eddie snorted, “That’s believable.” He groaned with sarcasm.”Is there any way that you can take off work on Thursdays?”

“No Eddie, I have bills to pay. Missing one day throws everything off track, and I’m not in a financial situation to do that.” Stan said seriously, though his tired expression and constant yawing didn’t make his point all that convincing.

Sighing, Eddie sat down next Stan and grabbed his hand, “What if there was a way that I could help you?”

“What do you mean?” Stan asked nervously, looking between his and Eddie’s hands. The sudden serious was starting to make Stan worry.

“I mean...that maybe if you find someone to pay for your things that it might be a little easier to get things done.”

“Eddie I am way too tired to try and figure out what the fuck you are saying, stop beating around the bush and tell me,” he groaned, starting to feel more confused than before.

“I think you should find a sugar daddy.”

Stan broke out into a sudden laughter. Surely Eddie was only joking, there was no in hell that Stan was going to get a sugar daddy, he wouldn’t even know where to get one and even if he did there was no way that he would do something like that. Regaining his composure Stan looked at Eddie and noticed that he still was carrying a serious look on his face.

“You’re joking, right?”

Eddie shook his head, “Of course not, I wouldn’t joke about something like this. I think it would really help Stan. I hate seeing you so stressed out, you can barely function. “

Stan jumped up from his spot on the bed, turning to Eddie with crossed arms, “You really think I'm so desperate to get some sleep, that I’d fuck some old man?” he was starting to feel offended. Stan knew that the two hadn’t known each other for long, but he thought that they were to a point where they respected each other.

“What? No, of course not. The oldest that people go on the app is forty-five, you wouldn’t be fucking old men. I promise. You wouldn’t be fucking anyone if you didn’t want to. A lot of the guys on the app just want someone good looking to spend their time with.” Eddie shrugged.

“There's an app, Eddie how do you know all this?”

“Oh uh...” his cheeks warmed at the question, eyes darting to the floor. “I’m kind of a sugar baby.”

“Eddie, what the fuck?” Stan was bewildered.

“What? You know as well as anyone else that it’s hard to work and school. My mom cut me off, and it was the last thing I could think of. The guy that I’m with is actually sweet.”

“You have a sugar daddy?” Stan practically yelled, eyes wide.

Rolling his eyes, Eddie answered, “Ugh Stan yes, that is what I just said. You don't have to do it, I was thinking that it might help. If I knew you were going to lose your shit like this I wouldn't have told you.”

“Eddie, I really appreciate the idea, but I don't think I could do something like that.”

“It wouldn't hurt to try," hope was laced in Eddie's voice. "I'll send you the name of the app.”

“Okay, I'll think about it,” gathering his things and putting everything in his backpack, “I have to go get ready for work, I'll talk to you later,” he walked back to his apartment. Opening the door he set his key down on the small table and flicked up the light switch.

Just as quickly as the light turned on it went off. Frowning, he flipped the switch up and down hoping that the light would turn on. When it didn't he sighed and tried to navigate his way through the dark, small area. He quickly found his room only managing to only bump into a few things. Feeling for the doorknob, he opened it and found his way to his bed, and laid down. He had forgotten to pay the electricity bill this week between studying and work.

Everything had been so busy that he forgot to call the electric company. His eye's started to sting with tears. Everything was becoming too much, and Stanley wasn't sure how to deal with it. Having the first two years of college paid for made his life so much easier, and now he wasn't sure how to function. Eventually, the tears started to fall, and all the stress from the last few weeks set in.

After crying for a little while Stan grabbed his phone out of his pocket and sent a message to Ben.

I'm not feeling too good, do you think you could cover my shift?- Stan

Yeah, ofc- Ben

Seeing the text, he felt relieved. Slowly, he moved from his bed to the closet to find his pajamas. Using the flashlight on his phone, Stan picked some that matched. Then, he walked to his bathroom to do his nightly routine, electricity or not there was no way Stan was going to mess that up.

It was almost two in the afternoon when Stan woke up. The sun was shining through his window onto his bed making it hard to keep his eye's closed. Opening them he looked around for his phone, turning it on he saw that there was a message.

Please just look at the app- Eddie

Rolling his eyes, Stan got out of bed and went to his kitchen to call the electric company. An hour later his electricity as back on. Seeing as Friday is his day off, he spent the rest of the day lounging around and getting a few assignments done. Around 8:30 he was sitting in a bubble bath, drinking wine and messing around on his phone. For about the fifth time that week, a picture of Eddie and his boyfriend showed up on his Instagram feed. They were at the park watching a movie that was being featured, and in the picture, they were holding hands.

To Stan, Eddie seemed very happy with this guy compared his past relationships. A lot of the guys were assholes who had very little regard for Eddie, but this boyfriend treated Eddie very well. It made much more sense to Stan when he learned that Eddie had a sugar daddy, all of a sudden Eddie was going shopping a ton, and getting a lot more of his work done. Thinking more about Eddie's relationship Stan was starting to feel lonely. For a while now Stan has been boyfriendless, his last relationship didn't end well, and since then he hasn't been in another. It wouldn't hurt if he checked out the app, and it didn't sound too shady when Eddie was talking about it.

Opening the app store he typed in the name and quickly pressed install. The way Eddie was describing the man didn't seem so bad. He looked happy when talking about him, in love even.

When the app finished downloading he created a profile. It asked for his age, weight, height, and something interesting about him. Once everything in he chose a picture for his profile. He settled on something Eddie took of him. He was laying in the grass with a flower in his hair, smiling at the camera. Pressing the create account button, he exited out of his phone and sent a message to Eddie.

I created an account- Stan

What's your username?- Eddie

Why?- Stan

Because I want to see what you did- Eddie

Rolling his eyes he sent his name and set his phone to the side. After he finished his wine Stan got out of the bathtub and put on his pajamas. Eddie sent a thumbs up, approving of Stan's profile. The rest of his night was spent texting Eddie and waiting for someone to message him.

#stan x mike #stanlon #stan uris #mike hanlon

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fattygraves · 5 years

Text

Nashville

My weekend did not have a proud start. On my 8:30pm flight to Nashville, I was exhausted. When exhausted, I also feel frisky and cuddly. This was not helped by the fact that I was flying next to a man who was the epitome of Canadian masculinity—avid winter sportsman with rough hands and rugged opinions. What magnificent hands he had. He was married with children, but we were flirting heavily anyway. I told you– I’m not proud. There was a lot of wonderfully unnecessary leg-touching. We sat in the back of the plane and ended up creating a little foursome with a Norwegian oil-worker, an obese southern health care worker, Renee (the masculine Canadian), and me, a wide-eyed woman in finance. I landed in Nashville at 9:30pm & was ready for bed, but ended up taking an Uber with Renee to his hotel in the opposite direction of my brother’s workplace. We thought the two locations were close. And, we were having too much fun flirting to double-check. I told myself it was innocent. I’m still not sure it was.

We dropped Renee at his hotel, where he hovered, saying nothing but looking at me like I look at Pizza when I’m on a diet. Then he disappeared to his room alone. We didn’t even hug goodbye because I think we both realized we were playing with regrettable fire. Renee didn’t seem to want to be the kind of man who’d do that to his wife. I didn’t want to be the kind of woman who would do that either. My hormones made me sullen, and my mind made me ashamed. So that’s how I felt when I went to wait for my brother at the bar of his restaurant/bar workplace, Bastion.

The cocktails were good and I quickly found these young artist-looking bucks. Amid joking with one that I really liked, two women walked between us and sat down. They said my brother had sent them over. Food industry friends of his, apparently. And they said “you’re welcome” for saving me from the weirdo with whom I was talking. My face did not inch towards smiling at that comment. I liked the weirdo and his too-big glasses and greasy hair. I liked him a lot. I made a salty comment about how Alex must not know me at all to send over two women to keep me company in a room of strangers because I love strangers. They were staying for good at this point as they had bought drinks, and I decided against being awkward or miserable. I definitely didn’t want to embarrass my brother, which is easy for me to do as we are polar opposites in almost every regard. So, I decided to enjoy being with them. Besides, everyone is interesting if you dig, I reminded myself. So I dug. And they were interesting. We talked post-baby bodies and post-baby shirt-on sex. Tracy, my favorite between the two, called herself corn-fed a couple times, which I learned is the same as calling yourself a heifer with a smile.

Alex took me to Attaboy after that. It’s a gorgeous bar. It’s secretive and stripped down and makes you want to curl into someone’s arm and swim around so deep in their gaze that you nearly drown smiling. I can tell you the cocktail I drank was a work of art and the people’s faces were flesh-colored, but that’s it. Because after the initial impression, I flopped myself over the bar and nearly fell asleep. I remember one thing—the male bartender was married to a man and had a beard. But that’s not distinguishing because in Nashville every man who can grow a beard grows his goddamn beard.

Thursday Thursday Thursday. I woke up alone on Thursday morning on the pull-out bed of my brother’s new house. He was sleeping at his old house as his bed was still there. He would be moving into his new home later in the day. I called him and asked if he’d be alright to meet at 2pm because I had a whim to try out Kundalini yoga. The opportunity for alone time seemed to be a relief for him. So, I threw on my tennis shoes and jogged at a tortoise-like pace for 6.2 miles to the nearest Kundalini yoga class.

I’ll give you two words to sum up my experience there: Asshole surgery. Unexpected, right? I thought so too. But that’s what we talked about after class. You see, Kundalini Kate (as I began to call her) was a 30-something yoga student who spent the ENTIRE yoga class talking, coughing, crying, belching, complaining about nausea, complaining about heartache, and farting. This is not from illness. Oh no. This is how she is at every single class and how she has been at every single class FOR FOUR YEARS. This is just her spiritual journey physicalizing itself, they explained— just like a guy who had three asshole surgeries. THREE surgeries on his sphincter, and this was an apparently healthy part of healing his soul. I was dissuaded from Kundalini by this point because if being healthy means asshole surgery, bring on the refined carbs. Nonetheless, it was a beautiful thing to see the genuine acceptance of our yoga teacher who, by the way, calls herself a Catholic Mystic and could not believe more in every aspect of Catholicism and every aspect of Kundalini Yoga. Did you know we all have ten selves and some of those selves are in love with people who we loved from other lives? I didn’t. Apparently, we should all recognize this truth to better understand ourselves. For example, she’s married but just knows she was in the deepest of loves with a man in another life and in another self but he is, in this life, a very wise practitioner of evil black magic and also a kundalini yogi. She’s also a spiritual shapeshifter, appearing as different people depending on the circumstance. I got in my Uber at this point because I had to meet my brother to help him move some boxes, but I bet there was a whole lot more.

That night, Alex had me set up to get the tasting menu at Bastion. Eating at Bastion is more spiritual than a gospel choir. God! I didn’t realize food could be like this. It was art. Art is honestly boring a lot of the time, but then you’ll hear that one song or watch that one movie or see that one painting and it stops you… like your scarf catching in a car door. This was the night I learned that food can do that to you. Soup from a can is so depressing to me now. I keep getting hungry and eating crap like that anyway, which makes me feel a little sad and frustrated. So, I think I’ll start cooking. I mean, if it doesn’t make me feel something, if it doesn’t have some intimacy and care to it, my new Foodie religion teaches me that I should wait until I can make or find something artful.

After dinner, I went to the bar in Bastion to wait for Alex to get off work. This is when I met Joey. Oh boy. If I wanted a man who was a relationship guy, it’d be him. He’s a good 4 inches shorter than me, slightly chubby, bearded (surprise), and he just sparkles. He loves people, and people love him. He zipped around behind the bar, but it felt like he was strolling around instead. He lingered and peered into each person’s soul just a bit when he handed them their drinks. He listened well. He made drinks well. He felt good in every single way a person can. Almost. You know how being on the ledge of a skyscraper, holding someone’s hand makes you feel? That’s a damn good feeling, but he doesn’t feel like that. He feels like that Attaboy bar did. He makes me want to curl up and swim in his gaze and in his arms. He’s safe, beautifully safe.

Okay, now Friday sweet Friday. My brother and I started the day at Barista Parlor. It’s a gorgeous, open coffee shop tucked away in a big garage with high ceilings, white shelves full of records, chic yet simple design, and hipsters everywhere. The coffee was good. I mean next level good. It’s famously ridiculed for the care it gives to its beans, its roasting, and its pour-over technique. But that coffee is the best in the nation. My brother was distant and irritable at first, as he had to deal with some personal finance stuff. So, I sat at the big hand-crafted wooden table tapping my fingers and looking around uncomfortably since he clearly didn’t want me to be there with him, but I had no escape. I turned from bitter to giddy when I realized that I could just get an Uber out of there. I suggested this with glee which offended him, so I stayed there, tapping my fingers. After he ate something and had coffee, he was all smiles. Not smiles, I suppose, more so smirks. But, he was definitely happier. He showed me this 3D wine map he created, which must have taken between a hundred and two hundred hours and was wildly impressive to say the least.

That night, we had dinner at a place called Rolf and Daughters, a rustic high class restaurant where we ordered nearly everything on the menu and tried different wines with each of the foods to see how they paired. It was really fun, actually. My brother finally sighed and said, “Okay. See, now I feel okay.” His month had been hectic and he was nobly trying his best to be present and kind, but the guy needed a break.

The meal was good. The conversation was better. My brother was honest about his perspective. He’s still upset about how distant and not nurturing our parents were and frustrated with their attempts to be close and nurturing now. Too little too late, he said. I said I wanted a relationship with them because they are fantastic people, albeit not so interested in being classic parents, and that I didn’t really care that they were reasonably absent in our childhood. He didn’t feel the same. That makes sense though. He has trouble seeing beyond the purity of ideas—He is an idealist to his core, worshiping the thoughtful, thorough, and pure. That means the titles “Mom” and “Dad” are more important than the individuals to whom the titles belong. If you’re a Mom, be a mom. If you’re a Dad, be a dad. I imagine this love of purity is what causes his frequent frustration with the world. No one is pure. Pure isn’t even definable.

He also told me to slow the fuck down. As I talked about my career and how much I loved working and wanted to progress, he just said, “That’s good… but slow down.” That was it. That was the whole conversation about my work. Just “slow down.” He was right. I changed my perspective almost instantaneously. I don’t need to be staring at the future all the time. It makes me feel inadequate to not yet be there. The stuff of life however is the right here, right now, person-to-person aliveness, isn’t it? That’s where the best surprises are. They’re right now, with you, right here. Smell the roses and all that. The rest of the dinner doesn’t matter really. Except the sourdough noodles. Damn, those were good.

After dinner, we went to the LCD Soundsystem concert. This is where I met Matt.

Matt and I met because of two things: One, my brother knew and loved him already because they are both top-of-class alcohol people. (My brother, wine. Matt, cocktails and some wine.) And two, he was dancing more wildly than anyone else at the venue, arms flailing, head banging, knees bending, eyes often closed, which drew me like a similarly flailing magnet. I stared smiling at his black skinny almost-handlebar mustache when my brother introduced us. The wonderful weirdo. Matt’s brother danced just like Matt. I joined in with them instantly, and Matt was downright amazed by this. The rest of the audience members were bobbing their heads to the ethereal rock tunes. It felt surreal, like we were floating on the eerie beats. The three of us, Matt, his brother, and I continued on with the head-banging and body-thrashing until the lights came up and the stage was cleared. I didn’t think much about his affection that night. I was not thinking about anything besides having as much fun as possible. And of course, I interspersed my flailing with scanning for Joey.

He was there too, Joey. And I only had eyes for him all night. 5 of us squeezed into a compact Uber car after the show—his short arm was forced around me and my big ass was forced on top of him. We both mentioned that we liked the arrangement. My brother was in the front seat. The Uber driver said, “Well, everybody’s squeezed in here pretty awkwardly.” My brother replied while chuckling, “Yeah, but it’s not as awkward as one of my best friends and my sister blatantly flirting in front of me.” This is the closest to protective I’ve ever seen him. It was surprising for us both I think.

Joey sure can hold his own in a crowd. Everyone adores him and he adores everyone. He’s short, but refuses to stand above people when they talk to him from a chair anyway. He always squats down to get on their level. I saw him do this multiple times. He just seems inherently humble and confident. Joey is a man to fall in love with. He’s a guy who I’d want my genes to mix with. He’s a guy who’d love well and parent kids well. He’s a partner kind of guy. I say all this after onle two days of knowing him, so I’m very likely wrong. Why do we do that? Make all these fantasies and plans with so little foundation to base them on.

I’m not really good for people like that. I realized this fact with my traveling of late. I love adventure and freedom and opportunity and flirting. I’ve been trying to find the perfect regimen of food and sleep and exercise for my mental health. Yet, enjoying life with all its booze, calories, and people leaves me beaming for days. So does being curled around this computer alone, typing to you in darkness. There’s a balance. But balance is so annoying to try to strike. Extremes, baby. That’s where the fun lives.

There’s one more person you need to meet from Friday. He has a first name, but he lied about what it was six times in a row so I don’t know what it is, but everyone just calls him Finney.

Finney is Alex’s manic-depressive addict ex-roommate. They lived together 3 years ago, and the experience was equal parts hilarious and hellish. Finney says more lies than truths because facts about himself (where are you from, what do you do, etc.) are not worthy of being shared in his mind. I don’t think he thinks that people actually want to know those things. Or maybe he thinks that if they do care about those things, they’re idiots because those things don’t matter. Maybe he’s right. And maybe we only want to know those things so we can decide if someone is worth knowing more deeply. Maybe he’s afraid no one will want to know him once they see he’s just as human as they are.

He said he had been in the Navy, Law school, and about 3 other false professions I can’t remember. I can’t tell you where he’s from because he gave too many different stories to too many different people. I can’t tell you what he does currently for work or what his musical preferences are as he pretended to both love and hate about every genre mentioned. I can only tell you how he felt— that was the one thing he was honest about. I know he really liked a girl named Jacqueline that night and was sad that she didn’t seem to end up liking him all that much. I can tell you that he was uncomfortable when a couple people didn’t laugh at his jokes and that he was annoyed by some man’s bro vibes at the party we went to after the concert. He was so loudly himself and so relentlessly mocking of the world around him that he made almost everyone shift uncomfortably. I really liked him, hilarious hellion that he was. I really really did.

And so did my brother, funnily enough. He likes eccentrics too, it seems. They make him smile like a dog with his head out the window. He so thoroughly enjoys the ride.

Saturday. Okay. Buckle up.

My brother and I had brunch with Tony, the 33-year-old charming horndog and Sarah, the 22-year-old sexy bundle of substances. Tony owns the house my brother moved out of over the weekend. That’s how we spent our daylight hours—moving my brother from Tony’s house to Jordan’s. Tony was, that very day, moving back into my brother’s old room from LA. And he brought Sarah along for the road trip because, as my brother eloquently put it, “he needed someone to keep his dick wet.” This is maybe a heinous thing to say but it was also accurate. We picked them up at 10:30am, and she was already drunk. She was maybe 95 pounds, glossy-haired, manicured, tanned, and scantily clad. Her most redeeming quality was her wide flat box of a nose.

She bobbed into the car and said a slurred comment about her star sign and Nashville and how happy she was to be here. Five minutes later, I kid you not, she asked, “Hey… where are we?” Alex laughed and said, “You mean, where in Nashville?” To which she responded, “OH! We’re IN Nashville. Wow. I can’t believe I’m in Nashville. I really like you guys so much. You know that? And Tonty loves Nashville so much. Do you guys call him Tonty here too? Ton. Tee. Tonty Tonty.” She rubbed herself all over him while giggling before he put her back in her spot like a child who escaped her car seat. She went back to smiling blankly out her window.

The meal we shared with them was delicious beyond words. We went to Urban Cowboy, which is a B&B that has a restaurant considered a food industry secret—everyone worth their salt in the food industry is in love with the Urban Cowboy brunch menu. We ordered the whole menu to share. Sarah didn’t experience this lovable brunch because she only ate the grapes, which were grilled. The fact they were grilled surprised her every time she ate one. All 6 times. I know this number because she mentioned that they were too warm every time she put one in her mouth to which I would respond, “Yes, they’re grilled.” To which she would go blank for a bit and then reply, “It’s weird that they’re warm, right?” I sounded like a tired caretaker of an Alzheimer’s patient by the end of the meal, at which point she was 4 tequila shots and one cocktail in, this added to whatever she was hopped up on before the meal.

When we dropped Tony (or Tonty as Sarah was still relentlessly singing) and Sarah off, Sarah told us to maybe text later, but definitely much later, because they’d be “fucking for like four hours.” Then, she giggled and stumbled into the house on Tony’s arm. As soon as that house door closed, my brother and I laughed the kind of uncontrollable laughs that only come when you’re making fun of someone. It’s sad that making fun of someone can be that fun, but damn, it really is. We drove off with giant guffaws, aching sides, and needle-sharp jokes.

That night, my brother and I bought prosciutto and basil pizza by-the-slice at this place called Five Points Pizza, where the chefs all had tattoos and casually flung pizza crusts in the air with cool smiles on their faces. We bought a bottle of wine, went home, and fell asleep watching Rick & Morty nestled into our individual spaces on the L-shaped couch, empty wine glasses and pizza crusts discarded around us.

I woke up at 11:30pm and asked my brother if he wanted to go to Matt’s big after-party for the fancy chef-centric event at the baseball stadium. I can’t remember what the Nashville team name is, but it was a Major League. Who cares about their name though? My brother said he’d do what I wanted and I said I’d do what he wanted and after a couple rounds of that I said, “If I wasn’t here, what would you do?”

He responded with, “I’d honestly go to bed. These last few weeks are catching up to me.”

“Perfect!” I said, “I’ll grab an Uber over and you go to sleep.” I threw the last of the pizza crusts in my mouth, gussied myself up, and ordered an Uber.

The Uber driver was a large, white, bald Iranian man who was thrilled to hear that I was visiting from Chicago because he loved the movie Chicago, the “beautiful, beautiful” movie Chicago. He said that the movie taught him not to “mess up with Chicago women, because Chicago women are dangerous. In a good way, they are dangerous. The most dangerous women– Chicago women.“ He then told me I look like Catherine Zeta-Jones, which I very clearly do not. The compliment made me feel powerful and gorgeous anyway.

I bounded out of the car to a dwindling after-party crowd. It was five minutes past the stadium’s closure for the night (meaning, the after party was supposed to be over) and they were ushering everyone out. I plowed right past the exiting numbers with my arms flung up in the air like I was Dolly of Hello, Dolly herself. Matt waved and sidled his way out of his conversation, but Tracy got to me first. Yeah, you’ve read her name before. She’s the corn-fed woman my brother sent over to greet me the first night I was in Nashville. We had a witty but forgettable conversation, because both of us were too distracted by the small Filipino guy dancing intently to the DJ. He was the only one dancing. And when the DJ stopped and began to pack up, he continued dancing. Drugs were very present this evening for him, I think.

The DJ group called themselves Sparkle City Disco and they were composed of three young men whose individual personalities had no hope of living up to the personalities of their clothes. They played disco music on vinyl only and accompanied the music with a series of flashing retro neon lights. I met all three of them but talked most with Jonas. He had a tight lil butt and high fashion overalls and gorgeous hair and thick-rimmed glasses. He talked to me slowly with his southern drawl, a crooked smile that wouldn’t quit, and the sweetest eyes. He told me about how he co-owned a pizzeria with a recovering drug addict, and I smiled at him like he was the most beautiful soul I’d ever met. The DJ’s and the chefs packed into cars to go to Matt’s brother’s place at 1:00am or so. They were running out of space so Matt suggested I ride with him on his scooter. I adored the idea and skipped and danced my way to the two wheels of fuel-efficient freedom.

The scooter looked like a motocross bike but was under 50 cc’s and had a horn that sounded like a kid’s toy. The horn gave him so much pleasure that he could not stop giggling when he honked it, which must have been 50 times in the 15 minutes we rode. When we were climbing on, he put the only helmet on my head and tied the strap under my chin because the snap was broken. When he did that, he kissed me on my mouth/cheek, which took me by surprise so I responded by saying “ohwoah. I didn’t realize… I would’ve…” but I stopped my sentence there because I didn’t know what I would have done. He smiled but otherwise didn’t respond. We just climbed on and rode, the slightly drunk Matt and I. Yes, I agree that was a dumb move. What a glorious ride that was though. That was the way to see the city—in the quiet 1:00am glow, whipping through the wind with my hands around his torso, resting on the small pouch of stomach fat over his otherwise muscular body. I breathed in deeply, just to smell the warmth of him. Ah, men. Yum.

Matt made me feel good in a dangerous way, like death might be a consequence of loving him. He listens to albums from beginning to end without distraction, often on vinyl. He has a typewriter, which he frequently uses. He talked about kindness and how he tried to train clients of his restaurant to be kinder, which seemed ironically patronizing to me. He spoke of politics only from the perspective of the heart. He talked music and food and drink and people only when he loved them, and oh man did he love the things he talked about. He also had a lot of idealistic arguments about how one should live life that did not make a lot of sense. His arguments weren’t arguments really though. They were impassioned perspectives. Beautiful little flimsy boats floating along without any motors or sails, boats that I liked looking at too much to bare filling them with holes.

He also offered me cocaine, an offer that I politely declined. Actually, I confidently and rudely declined, now that I think about it. I just laughed outright and said no without hesitation, which does retrospectively explain why he got sheepish immediately after the rejection and then said “yeah… yeah. Me either.” He then remarked, “Sometimes you want to be a nut. Sometimes you want to not be a nut. I’ve learned that when I want to be a nut, I have to tone it back.”

He was an angel-headed hipster through and through, wasn’t he? That Allen Ginsburg descriptor just rolled around and around in my mind like one of those carnival tilt-a-whirls that I almost killed myself on as a kid. When I was 6 or something, I tried to climb out of one of those and my dad about lost his own life trying to get on and stop me from committing self-inflicted manslaughter. All I remember is feeling sick and also angry that Dad wouldn’t just walk through the metal death trap and save me like Jesus on water. It’s so funny how confident we all were that our dads once had biblical superpowers.

During my discussion with Matt, the Sparkle City Disco DJ’s had brought in their whole set up. Flashing neon lights were transforming the white walls to lime green to blue to pink. Old disco records spun on the vintage DJ record table and filled the crates piled around the couch. There was plenty of room for the whole DJ setup too because Matt’s brother’s house, a large proper house, mind you, not an apartment, was nearly empty. Books were stacked here and there. A small couch sat in the middle. Otherwise, nothing. Just a house full of disco records, bearded chefs, and me. One of the chefs I talked to practiced Jiu Jitsu in his off time. He taught me how to choke him out and then tried to trick me into full-on knocking him out with a sleeper hold.

I talked more with Jonas, the DJ with the tight little butt, about his pizzeria before getting swept away by Matt again, that Angel Head. But that didn’t stop Jonas from tying to kiss me at the end of the night, which I was too surprised by to even know if I’d want to return the affection.

When the clock hit 3:15am, I left the party, took an Uber to get my bag at my brother’s, and then took another Uber to the airport, boarding my plane at 4:30am. I fell asleep immediately upon sitting down in the airplane, a smile plastered on my face.

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