#adele voice- go easy on me

[billybob598]

Teasing (Alessia Russo x Reader)

Just ignore how absolute shit this is. I told everyone I would write this, so I actually had to write it sadly. This was requested by an anon so hopefully this is what you wanted. I'm sorry for how short and terrible it is. Next fic is Sydney Lohmann x f1 reader so hopefully that will be better than this. Again any feedback good or bad is welcomed! So, please enjoy this absolute shitshow this fic is.

Word Count: 979 (Omg this made me sad)

“Y/N? Any chance we could leave this century?” Alessia calls up the stairs. You roll your eyes, continuing to straighten your hair. The sound of feet stomping against the carpet gathers your attention, Alessia wraps her arms around your waist while nuzzling her head into your neck.

“Love, if you don’t move your head I’m going to burn you,” you say gently, trying your best to move the hair straightener away from your girlfriend. All you get in response is her mumbling some incoherent words into your neck. The pout on her face makes your heart melt, but for everyone’s safety, you stand your ground. 

Ten minutes later, the two of you are heading out to the bar Ella and some of your teammates had decided to meet. With the World Cup coming up soon, the Manchester United team was trying to spend as much time as possible together.  It was a fact in your relationship that Alessia was the driver and you were the passenger princess. As she settles into the driver’s seat, you connected your phone to the car and decided on a playlist. For the excruciatingly long five minutes, it takes to get to the bar, you and Lessi are singing your hearts out to Adele. When your girlfriend parks the car, she rushes out over to your side and opens the car door for you.

“Ever the gentlewoman,” you say with a slight tease in your voice. She blushes as you get out. 

“Y/N/N!” A booming voice startles you, but you grin widely as Tooney approaches you happily. The midfielder links your hands and pulls you into the bar, not before you grab a hold of Alessia and drag her with you. The blasting music hits you like a shit ton of bricks. You were not prepared at all for the EDM blasting at full volume. Tooney says something about getting drinks so, you and Lessi search for any teammates that are already there. A few of you guys find a booth while Tooney brings over some shots. You sit close to Lessi while handing her a drink. She smiles gratefully at you before turning her attention back to the story Millie is telling very passionately. For about an hour everyone is talking and laughing, you were even able to get Alessia to dance with you for a few songs. In Alessia's fashion, though, she tripped on both her own feet and yours multiple times. After some of the team had calmed down, the five or six of you that were sitting in the booth fell into an easy-flowing conversation. Soon, the conversation turned toward the impending World Cup. Of course, you were on the USWNT and Alessia had made the Lionesses squad. Both of you had avoided talking about the fact that you would be away from each other for around two months and that there was a chance that you’d play against each other in the final. 

“So lovebirds, are you excited?” Mary Earps asks jokingly. Alessia laughs lightly.

“I’m ready, I don’t know about the US though. They better be ready to get their ass whooped,” she mocks, watching you out of the corner of her eye. To your credit, your reaction is controlled and measured, to the naked eye you don’t have a reaction, but Alessia knows you too well. The way your jaw clenches slightly and your hands closing into fists just the tiniest bit are all telltale signs that you’re pissed. Even if she didn’t know, you turn to look at her with raised eyebrows, cementing the idea that you were not pleased with your girlfriend. For the next few hours, all of the English girls continue to poke fun at your American ass. Again, to your credit, you hold your tongue and take the jibes with ease. It’s only when Katie Zelem makes a particularly harsh joke about the England v USA game back in October, that you snap.

“Man, you guys are talking a big game for a team that got knocked out by us in the last World Cup,” you retort. Your words catch everyone off guard. They all look at each other before bursting into laughter. The look of confusion on your face only making them laugh harder. 

“Damn Lessi, your girl’s got some bite,” Maya Le Tissier laughs out. Alessia smiles at you, but the smile soon turns into a smirk as she thinks of a comeback.

“Your talking a big game for a team that lost three games in a row,” the English player teases. As you narrow your eyes, you realize that neither of you are going to let the other off the hook with talking trash about their national team. 

“Mhmm I am, maybe ‘cause we’re 4-time world champs and you guys haven’t even made it to a final yet,” you say cheekily. While you both know it’s just fun and games, you’re determined to not let the other get the upper hand. For the rest of the night, your teammates watch in amusement at how the two of you continue to bicker. The banter being thrown around some might consider as being over the top mean, but to the two of you it’s perfectly acceptable. 

That night, as you settle into bed alongside of Alessia, you sigh loudly.

“You’re going to be sighing that loudly when we destroy you in the finals,” she snickers. You sigh again, this time in annoyance. 

“Seriously Less? It’s much too late for this and I’m much too tired to do this again,” you grumble, dragging one of your girlfriends arms across your waist. The blonde chuckles quietly and gently puts her face into the crook of your neck, kissing it softly. 

“I’m sorry, love. You just go to sleep now, and don’t forget…the USA is going down in the World Cup.”

#alessia russo x reader #alessia russo #woso x reader #woso imagine #engwnt x reader #man u women x reader

[st-kitten]

707 pt.3

← previous chapter christmas special

A/N: um... i've got two small special effects for this part, sooooo see if u can use them at the right moment :")

WARNINGS: trauma, implied death by accident, a good cry honestly, violence (intended IM A GIRLS GIRL BUT SOME THINGS ARE OKA-), that shlong, sloppenheimer (kidding: oral sex, both receiving), age gap (newsflash 😒) (reader is obv 20+ and toji is idk 38?)

"can we call y/n? for cake?" asked megumi.

"i'm not sure she wants to see anybody today, kid," replied a distressed toji

"but it's my birthday..."

toji couldn't resist megumi's puppy eyes. but he figured that if there was anyone you'd listen to, it would be him. it was worth a try.

both of them stepped out of their apartment, hearing music coming from your apartment. toji felt his breath returning to his lungs. music meant you were okay. or at least alive. your singing got clearer as the two of them stood outside your door. he tried knocking but it was left unanswered. toji wondered whether it was just a recording playing, so he pressed his ear on the door. no, that's definitely her. open the fucking door, y/n!

all toji had as a sign that you were inside were was you were singing.

[mention: easy on me, by adele, again for the lyrics ft.]

"i know there is hope in these waters..." is she crying?

"but I can't bring myself to swim, when i am drowning in this silence..." your voice croaked in the end. she's definitely crying. what the fuck did i do...

toji looked around the lobby. seeing it empty, he grabbed your doorknob and pressed hard on it, tearing it apart, breaking it. he gave it to megumi. he barged inside your barely lit, dark living room, only to find you sitting on the floor, head against the sofa, looking at the ceiling. broken glasses and torn papers surrounded you as you sang at the top of your lungs, voice overcome with some kind of pain that toji couldn't understand, but just feel.

"you can't deny how hard I've tried i changed who I was to put you both first but now I give up..."

"i was still a child..."

"so go eas-" hearing the door blast open, you stopped, whipping your head in its direction.

you were about to bark at toji when you saw the look on his face. fear... then you saw megumi, holding your doorknob, standing behind his father.

toji saw your grief-stricken face. the haunting melody of whatever heart-wrenching song you were singing still echoed in his ears, reaching out from the walls like a desperate cry for help. your disheveled hair clung to your face, a stark contrast to the carefree spirit that used to reside next door.

"w-what are you d-"

"what happened?"

toji treaded carefully around the broken glass, telling megumi to wait where he stood. he knelt down beside you, pushing away the small shards.

you sat there, too horrified to say anything. why is he here? a small shaky breath left your mouth, the rest bubbling up like lava, ready to erupt.

"i don't know what i did baby, but i'm sorr-" toji's apology went unheard as tears streamed down your face and a cry tore through the air like a wounded animal's howl. it was guttural, unrestrained, and laced with a pain so visceral that toji felt it in his bones. the sound wasn't pretty; it was raw and unfiltered, like the ugly side of life laid bare for anyone in earshot.

without a second thought, toji enveloped you in a tight embrace, pulling your trembling shoulders into him. he sat on the floor next to you, one leg folded down and the other tucked to his chest. he felt an involuntary shiver run down his spine as you sobbed into him.

"it's okay..." was all he could say. even he knew that it wasn't about fixing everything; it was about being there in whatever storm was raining down on you. he looked at megumi, unsure about how his son would take seeing you break down. the child stood a silent witness to all of it, his eyes glistening slightly.

"why is it okay?" you muttered. "for parents to be your first bullies..."

"what... stopped them," you sniffled, "from just listening to me?"

toji held onto every word that came out of your mouth. a part of him was relieved that this wasn't about him.

"i didn't want a fucking cake... i didn't want a cake, i just wanted them..." your breath hitched.

"you spend half of your life raising a child in the cruelest way... your last words to each other end up being an argument and... your last words to me were nothing..."

toji felt a knot in his stomach. he watched megumi leave and go back to their apartment. he was torn between his kid, disturbed on the eve of his birthday and the woman he was cradling, on her birthday...

as the echoes of your cry faded, they left behind a heavy, oppressive silence. only your shaky breath could be heard. he sat beside you, his eyes searching for the right words as you wiped away the tears that had traced down your cheeks.

"birthdays are supposed to be happy, ya know..." he whispered to you, as gently as he could. as if the wrong words would shatter you.

"they're also supposed to be spent with family apparently..." you said, gritting your teeth. toji didn't know what to say... he wanted so desperately to talk to her. but how do you even say something at a time like that?

megumi's small steps echoed in your living room. both of you looked at him. you felt like bawling your eyes out and toji simply smiled at his son.

megumi carried a small plate with a loaf of bread sitting atop, two tiny candles buried in it, their flames flickering in the dark room. he stood in front of you, holding out the plate to you with his tiny hands.

you held the plate, placing your hands on his. you glanced at the clock, which was seconds away from midnight. you blew one candle, covering the other with your palm. and when the clock struck 12, megumi blew the other candle out.

"happy birthday, gumi," you put the plate down and hugged him. he wrapped his tiny hands around you, resting his head on your shoulder. "happy birthday, y/n," he said softly.

hours passed by as you talked to toji about your unforeseen disappearance. megumi had fallen asleep in your lap and you stroked his head. you told him about your 13th birthday, your parents death in a car crash... you left some things off the conversation. oh, how toji felt each word you said. he knew how ruthless families could be. his own was never kind to him. he told you about his scar in return, and how he felt insecure about it.

"it's kinda hot, if you ask me." seemed like you were back to being your normal self.

toji smirked. "i know. you wouldn't stop kissing it last night."

you smacked his chest with the back of your hand. but it brought you two to that conversation. toji wanted it off his chest.

"i like ya."

you looked at him, taking a shallow breath.

"not just 'cause we made out yesterday. i'm the worst person to talk about feelings and shit to, but... i got 'em. for you." toji was done with it. he didn't want to stretch it any further. not after the day you'd had.

you opened your mouth to speak but he cut you off, "sit with it for a while. ya don't need to answer me right now."

toji picked megumi up from your lap, carrying him in his arms. he pressed a soft, patient kiss to your lips. "belated happy birthday," he said against your lips, got up and left, leaving a large hole in your door.

[ambient song y/n might vibe to: jeene mein aaye maza, by ankur tiwari]

you wandered aimlessly in the convenience store, picking up things and putting them back where they didn't belong. you circled the whole store thrice until the cashier asked you if something was wrong. paying for cheap beer and rice crackers you didn't even want, you left the store.

you walked home in the evening, head in the clouds. (a cloud shaped like toji)

he liked you. his words hammered in your mind like construction workers at the crack of dawn. girls usually felt giddy after hearing a boy confess to them. the fuck were you feeling? and why was it some kind of diarrhoea? you mind went back to how you'd kissed and how good it felt. there was no doubt that you found him attractive. you liked spending time with him. but did you like him? what even would you do if you did? date him? be his girlfriend? mother to his child? how did one go about dating an older man? if anything, he'd end up with another child.

you walked by a park, watching children playing (mostly falling), building sandcastles in the pit (and falling on them), running around chasing nothing (and falling), scurrying into their parents' arms (guess what).

did you want to be that to megumi? because being with toji meant being with megumi and being responsible for him.

you sat down on the pavement, sipping on beer that tasted like toothpaste, pondering over what kind of life you'd build for yourself. you were not interested in hook up culture. committed relationships were made to sound like life imprisonment sentences. the titles didn't apply to you and especially him. what would being with toji even look like? once your little quinn project comes to an end, what then? would he grab the cash and bolt? would he stay? would he stay anyway?

the more you sat and thought about it, the more things blurred. you thought it best not to overthink it. he did tell you to not rush an answer. but you were not the most patient of all people. the one thing you disliked was how things get awkward every time someone confesses their feelings out of the blue and the other has to be the dealbreaker.

you decided to do the rest of the thinking at home. the city was twinkling with christmas lights and decorations. it was always a wonderful sight to see. it made you want to travel to a quaint countryside only to realise your long lost love for the holiday season and family values as you broke into song about reuniting with your childh-yes, that hallmark movie.

when you entered through the gate to your building, you spotted megumi near the postboxes. a very uncomfortable megumi... in the arms of a woman you'd never seen. she looked rich. fur coat, pradas, sunglasses that covered her whole face like a covid shield. megumi so didn't want to be held like that. your gaze fell on toji, who... drumroll... had the exact same expression as his kid. as you walked in that direction you could hear the conversation.

"he likes me, don't you think?" PLEASE that's what rich people sound like?

"just put him down," toji sighed.

"no, i'm gonna steal him!!!" she giggled, shoving her face into megumi. he flinched and pushed himself away from her.

"aww, he's so playful... toji, why don't you invite me over for a drink?"

megumi wiggled like a worm in her arms, trying to escape her grip. he twisted like a pretzel until she had to put him down. but she held onto his hand tightly. that didn't go unnoticed by toji who was growing angrier every passing minute.

"come on... it'll be fun," she sneered.

"i gotta look after my kid." that was all he said.

"i'm sure he won't mind... right meggy? you'll let daddy and i play for a while, right?" megumi tried to pry her hands off, but she tugged at him harshly.

suddenly, all the diarrhoea made sense. the blur cleared. your eyes narrowed as you observed the audacious scene unfolding before you. something in your head snapped and you took purposeful steps towards her, and offensive gaze locked, devoid of any remorse.

swatting her hand off of megumi's, you put the kid behind you protectively. in a millisecond, your hand swung with conscious thought, as you smashed the beer bottle on her head. the glass shattered on her scalp, cutting through the background noise like a warning shot.

"not. your. kid."

caught between shock and appreciation for your sudden defence, toji covered his curled mouth with his palm. he looked at megumi, who stood behind you, holding the ends of your jacket. the kid looked back at his father, smirking mischievously. toji turned his cackling laughter into an asthmatic cough.

the woman couldn't take a hint even when it hit her in the skull.

"who do you think you are?"

"how dare you hit me? do you know who i am?"

"i'm talking to you!!! hello!!!??"

you let her run her mouth. you weren't interested in what she had to say. you looked down at megumi. you could see the faint red strip that circled his wrist. you knew how manipulative it was to use toji's kid as a means to get to him. you already befell his threat. but you understood it all of a sudden.

the honest urge to protect your kid.

the woman eventually stomped and left, mouthing cuss words at passersby.

"so... care to explain what that was?" asked toji, folding his hands, looking at you with fascination.

"my answer," you said with a smile as you held megumi's little hand, rubbing the back of it with your thumb.

toji smirked proudly.

"what happened here?" asked the building watchman, who heard about the act of violence from others who witnessed it.

"nothing interesting,"

"they're saying you harassed a woman," he was quick to throw an accusing glance at toji.

"nonsense! just some personal drama," you interrupted. "that's the father, this is his son."

"and that's the unholy spirit..." toji mumbled to the guard, earning a death glare from you.

the three of you walked towards the elevator. you handed megumi the rice crackers you bought and he wasted no time in digging in. toji put his arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer as he whispered in your ear, "what does a fella like me have to do to see you smash another bottle again?"

"flirt with another woman and i'll gladly smash one on your head."

toji's deep chuckle vibrated in your ear.

megumi dragged you inside their house to show you his new sketches. he'd really outdone himself. he'd also made his father hang all the small drawings on the christmas tree they had in their living room. toji was glad that he'd found something to occupy himself with. not that he didn't want to spend time with the kid, but seeing him not get overly attached to a single parent relieved the giant weight on his shoulders.

"mmm! gumi, i have a gift for you."

megumi trotted to you like a puppy, eyes twinkling like stars.

"you're gonna spoil him."

"correct."

you gave him a cd. "i wrote you a song." megumi clutched the cd like a prized trophy. he opened the case and showed his father the cd. you'd chased down your producer's sales guy to put one of megumi's sketches as the cd cover.

"when did you even have time to do this?"

"last night. and today morning."

"you didn't sleep?"

you looked away from him, perfectly expecting a fatherly scolding. instead, toji just chortled. he left megumi to listen to your song on a loop as the two of you went to your apartment. (sorry megs, but this is a toji x y/n)

you closed the door, swearing that the hole where your doorknob used to be was getting bigger by each minute. not a moment later, toji had his arms wrapped around you, his mouth on yours. you dropped the grocery bags on the floor and threw your hands around his neck. bumping into nearly every piece of furniture along the way, you sauntered into your room, lips glued to each other. he kissed you like it was the last thing he could do in the world and you kissed him like it was the first thing you wanted to do before anything else.

"mmm... hold on," toji pulled away momentarily and said, "promise me one thing."

"what?"

"you don't disappear when shit hits the fan. you come talk to me."

you felt guilt churn inside you, recalling how you'd left toji and megumi to wonder what 'they' had done wrong to make you go distant.

you nodded. "i promise."

toji held you in his arms for a while, taking a look at your face. he tucked a strand of hair behind your ear and you winced.

"ow! careful, i just got my ear pierced."

toji raised his eyebrows. he pushed your hair aside and saw a helix piercing, the edge of your ear pink and slightly swollen.

"that looks like it hurt."

"oh, it did."

"then why'd ya get it?"

"i always get piercings on my birthday."

"why?" toji honestly didn't understand this form of self-harm.

"what can i say, buddy, i love getting stabbed..." you said plainly, backing away and took your shoes off.

toji snorted a laugh at your comment. "masochist."

"aww, big man uses big words now..." you said, keeping your shoes under your bed. toji simply slapped your ass.

"sadist."

"by the way, i added some background noises to our recording. it sounds so good!"

"oh? let's hear it then," said toji, sitting down on your bed. he was glad to see you be your usual confident self. last night had him tensed with worry. even though he wasn't the source of your pain, he couldn't imagine how lonely you must've felt spending your birthday crying as life wickedly toasted to your parent's death, scarring the one day you were supposed to own with pride.

you made him listen to some excerpts, but ended up talking over them anyway, excitedly telling him how smartly you had edited some things. he just watched you with a small smile. whenever you turned to face him, his eyes fell on your piercing. he counted how many you had. nine. marking nine years of an anniversary nobody would want to remember like this. four piercings on each ear and one in your nose. did you really need the pain to validate your broken heart? did it make you feel like you deserved it?

he dismissed those thoughts from his head. it was your decision. and you bore it like an ornament, and not a scar. plus, he now that he fully took your face in, he couldn't deny hot incredibly hot those piercings looked on you. the thought of you sitting through that and showing off your piercings made his stomach flip. seriously, how much more hot could you get?

as if to answer his question, your recording played in his ear, some scene at a party with your characters failing to keep their hands to themselves. his voice blended with yours like the perfect duet. the way you spoke, changing your tone, pitch, hell, even your little laugh to suit your character made him feral. he wanted to hear you more. but not for some recording. he wanted to hear you for himself.

the moment the recording ended, toji pounced on you, grabbing your neck, careful not to hurt your ear as he kissed you roughly. you gasped, but melted on the spot. you liked where this was going anyway. toji moved his lips along yours, nibbling at you mouth. he let you catch a breath, before shoving his tongue inside, only for it to hitch again.

he pushed you into your bed, immediately hovering over you. he let his hands run up and down your legs. you hummed under his touch. he felt you shuffle underneath. he pulled away for a moment to watch you sneak your phone out of the pocket, finger pressed on a red dot.

"you wanna give your fans a show, baby?" he murmured.

"nuh uh, this is for me," you panted.

toji smirked. "gotta make this good then..." he peppered kiss on your neck, sucking on your skin. he could smell that god awful coconut perfume. to ease the weight his humongous body dumped on you, he shoved his knee between your legs, hoisting himself over you properly. you practically moaned in his mouth at the feeling of his knee rubbing against you. you had no idea what to do with your hands, so you just let them stay on your stomach lifelessly.

toji broke the kiss once more, chuckling at the whine that escaped from your mouth.

"so needy..." he growled, taking his shirt off with one hand. your jaw hung open as you took him in. the way he towered you even when sitting on his knees made him seem almost... monstrous.

toji only it thought it fair to get rid of your clothes too. he held your waist and pulled you to him, hoisting you on his lap. he took your jacket off, throwing it on the floor.

"be careful with the shirt. it's vivienne westwood."

"strip then."

slowly, taking the sweet time of your life, you pulled the shirt off, turning it right side up and neatly folded it, placing it at the far end of your bed.

"you done, sweetie?" he cooed in your ear.

"done."

"lovely. put your hands to use." he had you folded under him, back on the bed, kisses getting rougher, wetter, messier. you clawed at his shoulder, back, neck, chest, every part of him that you could touch. he licked a particular spot just under your ear that made you mewl in pleasure. like a vampire, toji bit your neck, causing you to moan softly.

his free hand unclasped your bra and tossed it away.

"would it kill you to not throw my clothes here and there?"

"thought you liked it violent, baby..." he murmured in your ear, biting a hickey on your neck. he kept switching between kissing your lips and sucking at your neck while he played with your tits, squeezing them, pinching them, kneading them like dough. he was right. they did fit in his hands perfectly. he latched his mouth onto one, making you squirm under him.

toji was absorbing your body. he felt bold; bold to take what he wanted from you. well, what he wanted was you. your body, your hips, your mouth, all of it. he wanted to show you just how desirable you were to him.

the hand that roamed your waist slowly trailed down your cargo pants. you didn't even realise when he took them off, but it was good anyway. less is more.

at an agonisingly slow pace, the tips of his fingers teased you over your panties. toji took a look at you, covered in his marks, lips pink and swollen.

he chuckled, "just how many of these stupid panties do you have?"

"I FUCKING KNEW IT. PANTY THIEF!" you smacked his abs.

"they're mine now," toji murmured as back away, spreading your legs apart with his hands, grabbing at your thighs. he kissed your inner thigh languorously making his way down to your wet cunt. he took your panties off, once more putting them back in his pockets. he dipped two of is fingers inside slowly, as if he was learning about your body. he watched your every reaction, every quiver, every hitched breath as he took his time and prepped you for himself. he curled his fingers at an optimal spot and like a cat on heat, you mewled and your legs shut tight around his hand.

"uh uh uh, i need these legs wide open, darling." he knew how much you liked it when he said that. when you didn't spread them, he smacked a hard slap on your hip, causing you to gasp and giggle as you did as directed.

"don't be a brat."

"or what?"

toji didn't retort. instead, he dove straight into your cunt, painting your insides with long strokes with his tongue. he paired it with his forefinger running up and down, inside and out, pushing against your clit. hearing you whimper and pant just made him want to tease you. recording all those dirty audios with you had him gain a mind in the game. like an illusionist, his hands disappeared and he pulled away, making you pine for him.

"toji fushiguro, i will smash a bottle on your head if you ever take your mouth off me like that again..." god, you sounded so sexy.

"ya know... it makes my dick hard when you talk to me like that."

you crunched forward and grabbed his hair, pulling him back to your pussy. toji chuckled, resuming eating you out like a man starved for days.

"oh i bet it does," you said breathlessly, throwing a few more slurred taunts his way. toji extended his free hand and shoved two of his fingers in your mouth.

"put that mouth to use, brat." he groaned in pleasure feeling your tongue swirl around his fingers, sucking them, gently biting them whenever he lapped at your cunt the right away. even with his fingers stuffed in your mouth, he could hear your muffled moans loudly. he sped his pace, slipping his fingers in and out of you, lapping at your core. he felt you clench and he took it as an open invitation to increase the pressure. you let out a long, stretched moan as you gushed all over his chin.

"is this what you ladies call girl dinner?" toji took his fingers out of you, licking them and tasting you, smacking his lips.

you laughed, throwing your head back.

"ugh, shut up."

"make me," you commented, practically waltzing into the man's next plan for you. toji's hand wrapped around your throat as he pulled you up as if you weight nothing. he got off the bed, standing in front of you as you were on all fours.

"gladly," toji slid his pants and boxers down, freeing his hard-as-a-rock girth.

"this isn't fair, toji," you cried at the size of it.

"i know, baby..." he gripped your chin with his fingers, nearly crushing your jaw. you looked up at him and seeing you on your knees for him lit a fire within him.

playfully you licked his wet lip like a kitten...

"cute. but that's not gonna cut it, sweetheart."

"i'll have you know i won the popsicle eating contest in my college..."

toji chuckled, holding his cock out to your face and smacked it against your lips. "gonna keep me waitin'?"

you took his head in your mouth, swirling your tongue around it, letting the tip run between the faint slit. you bobbed your head a few times, adjusting to his length and width. you'd be grateful to have a jaw left by the time you've sucked him dry. you took his length in your, stroking what you couldn't. you felt his cock twitch and pulsate in your mouth.

"god, you're doing so well..." toji reached forward, accidentally thrusting more of his dick in your mouth, making you whimper. he picked up your phone, which had been recording every lewd sound you made and he held it by his hip. "you sound so... fucking perfect, baby... gagging over my dick like that."

he pushed your hair aside, gripping it tightly as he pushed your head further in, moaning at how good it felt to have you take damn nearly all of him.

"fuck... shit.... s' good" toji let a buffet of grunts and moans spill out of his mouth. first, because he you took him that well, and second because he wanted you to get off to his voice, just like he did to yours. he began thrusting into your mouth faster, feeling his release creeping its way up. had he known how easy it was for him to come just by getting a quick blowjob, he'd have put more work into the foreplay. but fuck, he loved every damn moment of it. how your mouth was wet and warm, how your pointed tongue knew just where to lick, how your cheeks hollowed to pull him in.

"keep going, baby... i'm almost there," he panted, closing his eyes and letting his head fall back, hips moving at a brutal pace. his mind went to you eating a popsicle for some reason and he laughed, paving the way for a guttural moan that rumbled through his mouth as he came into your mouth. you closed your eyes, letting the uncomfortable feeling pass away as you managed to swallow the barrel full of cum he just shot into your mouth.

toji pulled out, feeling euphoric. he was completely obsessed with you. he wanted to take your right there. he wanted to be inside you. fuck, he wanted to see how loud you could get for him.

a knock on your main door and a small voice calling out to toji snapped you back to your senses.

"what a cockblock," toji sighed.

you threw a pillow at him. "that's your adorable birthday boy you're talking about!"

toji changed back into his clothes, refusing to give you your panties back, earning another pillow to his face. he looked at you to make sure you still didn't have second thoughts about him. but there you were, effortlessly moving around the room, picking up the pieces of clothing he'd tossed here and there. he loved how much fun you had doing all these things with him. it made the experience twice as much worth it.

you changed into your pyjamas and led toji out of your bedroom.

"does it say 'juicy' on your ass?" he said, reading the glittery text on your pants.

"ya bet it does," you smacked your own ass, proud of your sense of fashion, no matter how ridiculous it was.

"gonna fuck that ass someday."

"fix my door first." you peeked through the hole in your door, looking at the top of megumi's hair.

you opened the door to see megumi standing in his pyjamas, holding his demon dog, yawning.

"awww, sorry for keeping your dad for so long."

megumi yawned again, nodding.

"she sang a song for me too, you know..." said toji, picking up his sleepy kid, giving you a wink. you kicked his ass, making him stagger out of your house.

"good night."

"good night..." you smiled at the two.

ଘ(੭ˊᵕˋ)੭* ੈ✩‧₊

TAGLIST: @kaininety2 @ruixrei @chicken-fifi @mrsfush1guro @szillx @queendessi24 @sillysillygoofygoose @shadowmoonlight0604

#forgive me father for i have sinned #toji fushiguro #dad toji #toji #fushiguro #toji fushiguro x reader #toji x reader #toji x y/n #toji fushiguro x y/n #megumi #juicy pants

[brunchable]

All I Ask - Part 1 || Stephen Strange x Reader

Word count: 2.7K

Warning: References to Multiverse of Madness. Angst. 

A/N: This is my first time writing, so please take it easy on me. This imagine has been inspired by All I ask by Adele and Arcade by Duncan Laurence (ft. FLETCHER).

PART II // PART III ***Strictly do not: claim, repost, copy, translate my stories anywhere else***

You blankly stared at your reflection as you wore a pair of diamond earrings, it was the very first gift Stephen has given you. There's a lot of things running in your mind; Stephen's unresolved feelings for Christine being the centre of it. It was her wedding day today and you've been invited considering the fact that you're a close friend at work. You straightened yourself up with a sigh, feeling that your beauty is inadequate compared to Christine. 

"You look beautiful." Stephen's silky deep voice whispered against your ear before giving you a tender kiss on your temple. His slender, yet scarred hands rested on the curves of your waist.

Stephen's sudden appearance startled you, the mini heart attack causing you to clutch the centre of your chest, "Damn it, Stephen! Will you stop creeping up on me like that? Dating a wizard should come with a warning." 

Stephen gave you an offended look through your reflections, stepping away to sit on the edge of your bed, "Uh No, correction, you're dating sorcerer, wizards wear hats and use wands, lame."

"Mhm, and I guess the warnings for Doctor Strange come after you've been bagged right?" You chuckled, reaching for your sweet perfume that Stephen goes nuts for and sprayed it on your wrist then dabbing it behind your ears. 

"Are you seriously comparing me with spell books?" His brows raised, feeling a hint of an edginess in your attitude, which he decides to ignore. He was reading this situation as banter. 

You remained quiet, because for you, your question had two meanings; one was about his use of magic and two, you know that he is not over Christine. You didn’t know how you hadn't noticed from the very start when all the signs were clear as day. Stephen still wears that damned busted watch, there is sorrow in his eyes when she becomes the subject of conversation, the way he lights up when he talks to her and the way he looks at her. 

You searched for those behaviors whenever you're together and by the time you realized he was never going to look at you the same way,  you were already in too deep, you didn't have the guts to say anything because you're scared of losing him. You decided that you will wait for him quietly, but it’s been one year and you're close to snapping. You're a ticking time bomb. 

•••

You admired the decorations inside the church while you and Stephen sat waiting for the ceremony to start. Doctor West was chatting with Stephen and you quietly eavesdropped on their conversation. The man seemed consumed by grief as he talked about his brother and cats, asking Stephen if there had been another way, "... and still you didn't get the girl." Doctor West said.

Ouch. Was it really necessary to be so brutal? You thought and grimaced.

Stephen adjusted his tie on Doctor West's comment, you could feel that he was hurt by it even though his face remained expressionless. He wasn't the only one who got emotionally damaged though. You clutched onto your dress looking elsewhere but Stephen.

Music began and all the guests stood up as Christine prepared to walk herself down the aisle. She looked immaculate in her white dress, her eyes focused on her soon-to-be-husband as she graciously made her way to the altar. 

You turned your body slightly to look at Stephen behind you and there it was again, that longing look, it was obvious that he had tunnel vision towards the bride since he didn't even notice you looking at him. Why am I not surprised? You caught Doctor West's gaze for a split second with water welling in your eyes, as Stephen was fixated on Christine who was fixated on the groom. You quickly turned and wiped them away before they fell, only then Stephen came to his senses, "(Y/N) are you alright?" 

You cleared your throat before talking, afraid that your voice might crack,"Yeah I'm fine, weddings y'know? They're a real tear jerker." You lied and laughed it off. You felt his hand cover your smaller ones, his thumb rubbing the back of your hand as consolation. You sat frozen on your seat for the rest of the ceremony, too afraid to look up at Stephen, too afraid that your cup of emotions might overflow. 

"Should anyone present know of any reason that this couple should not be joined in holy matrimony, speak now or forever hold your peace." The Pastor asked the guests. Stephen squeezed your hand, his jaw clenched as if prohibiting himself to speak. This man, he is in love with someone else, if this wasn't enough proof then you don't know what is.

•••

You decided to separate from Stephen for a while during the reception, you were feeling a range of negative emotions that you needed to suppress. You hid it well towards your friends and colleagues, you weren’t so sure if you would be able to hide it from Stephen any longer, that's why you needed to remove yourself from his presence. 

Stephen hung out at the bar drinking a martini after another round of failing to find you. Christine cleared her throat as she approached the bar where Stephen stood, "A glass of red please." She smiled at the bartender.

You glanced towards their direction from time to time as you caught up with your colleagues, chugging your cocktail and grabbing another from a server that offered. You watched your lover turn water into wine, a sardonic laugh managed to slip from your lips. 

Juliet, your work bestie, followed the direction you were looking at and gave you a look, "I warned you from the start girl."

"I know, I know, I was too blind to see that he probably just kept me around to fill in that black hole, he calls his heart." As much as you hated to say it, you did, you downed another glass and grabbed a glass of champagne this time, "Jeeze, I'm so pathetic, what was I thinking I got something that Christine doesn't?" You laughed at yourself, watching Stephen stopping Christine from walking away. 

"Don't say that! You are not pathetic. Stupid and blinded? Yes. All you need to do now is to follow your head this time babe." Juliet rubbed the side of your arm, glancing at the other two. 

"I want to know what they're talking about." You darted towards the pair, at the same time you made sure that you weren't spotted. Juliet tried to stop you from causing yourself anymore torment but as much as you hated to admit it, you wanted to feel the pain, just in case if tonight doesn't end well, maybe it would be less painful then.

"Christine— I should’ve, " Stephen took a deep breath, "I wish it would've been different– I never stopped caring about us, but I had to make sacrifices… to protect you, I’m sorry." Stephen lowered his gaze.

Christine shook her head, keeping her eyes on him, "It was never going to work out between us."

Stephen raised his eyes to look at her again, her reply stung a lot, "Why not?"

"Because Stephen… you have to be the one holding the knife, and I've always respected you for it but I couldn’t love you for it." 

Stephen pressed his lips together, avoiding eye contact this time, "Truly, I’m just glad that you're happy."

Christine nodded, smiling and getting teary-eyed, "I am, I really, really am."

"Good." Stephen smiled though it was a pain.

"Are you? Are you Happy?" 

"I'm happy." He said, uncertainty present in his tone. Then the thought of your relationship with him crossed his mind.

"Good, you deserve it. Take care of (Y/N), she's heaven sent." Christine patted his shoulder before walking away from him. Your eyes shut tight while also walking away after hearing Palmer mention you in a positive light. Every noise around you becomes a blurred sound, while all that's been said keeps replaying in your head, you can hear Stephen's words loud and clear. I wished it would've been different– I never stopped caring about us. 

Strange noticed your figure walking towards the elevators in a hurry. After not being able to find you in the time frame of being there, he could feel something was wrong because now you're leaving without a word. He ran after you but he was too slow, your eyes landing on each other as the elevator doors shut. At least he had the decency to run after you. 

You saw a glow of golden light reflecting all around the elevator's metal walls, "You're really leaving without me?" Stephen asked after stepping out of the portal. You chuckled quietly, amused at the fact you forgot that he could easily catch up to you. 

"I could never get used to this sorcery," A cold laugh followed, "And yes I am– was leaving without you, Stephen." You answered his question, your face turning dead-pan. The storm that was brewing inside you was only getting stronger in his presence. Another portal opened in front of you, the other side appeared to be your living room— where you're likely to spend the night alone eating ice cream while you drown yourself with tears. You passed through without hesitation and he followed.

"How much have you heard–" He broke the awful silence between you, the portal closing behind him at will. So he knows. 

"Enough. Enough to wake me up from this dream I've been having." You answered his straightforward question with a straightforward answer. You've beaten around the bush long enough to do it now. You didn’t want to tread carefully anymore, you were ready for what's to come, you've had enough. 

"What dream? What are you talking about?" He asked with a slight impatience in his tone. His hands grabbed you by the shoulders and spun you around to face him.

"I've come to a realisation that I am never going to be good enough for you Stephen. All of this– this– this is one sided, and I was stupid and naive to gaslight myself to believe that one day you will look at me like how you look at Christine." You looked anywhere but his blue eyes, afraid that you would melt and give in your false bravery right now. 

"I can't believe this— you're jealous of Christine? Where did we just come from? Her wedding! I can’t have her!" His voice slowly got louder. This time you found the courage to look at him in the eyes, your gaze burning into his soul as you pushed him away from you. 

"I am not jealous of Christine, I am everything but jealous. I know you cannot have her and I know she definitely doesn't love you romantically anymore, so why would I be jealous?" You increased your tone as well. Stephen cocked his head back, surprised to get shouted at by you for the first time, "And since you don't have a clue of what I really am feeling– then I will gladly tell you."

"Oh please, enlighten me." Stephen replied through his gritted teeth. His gaze was unwavering.

"I feel unappreciated, unloved, unnoticed–" You began but instantly got cut off by the man.

"So you’re acting like this because of my lack of attention towards you?" He rolled his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, "That's real mature (Y/N)–"

"Oh for fuck's sake Stephen!" You threw your hands in the air, irritated at the fact that he had the nerve to get narcissistic with you, your patience was hanging by a thread, "You just asked me how much I had heard! You wished it would've been different right? If you had the chance for a different outcome, you would choose–" Her. Your throat burned and had to stop yourself from talking before your voice cracked, you bit the inside of your cheek and swallowed the lump you felt inside your throat.

You continued, "I know you're still holding onto her Stephen, I have for awhile– It’s so fucking obvious." 

"If I am then why am I with you?" He asked with his low baritone voice that gave shivers down your spine, he was getting angry and you could tell he didn't want to have this conversation.

"You should ask yourself that– because I. don't. know. Maybe you're lonely, maybe you need someone to make you feel something to mask the fact that you can't get over Christine." 

Stephen scoffed, "And you need to understand, that I was gone for FIVE YEARS and when I came back the love of my life was engaged and now married to someone else!" He finally snapped, his angry eyes telling you that his brain is in a different mode, he was incapable of seeing your side of the story at this point. 

You flinched at his passion, "I understand how you feel—" 

"Oh please, how would you understand exactly how I feel?" 

"For the past year Stephen I have watched you love someone else from afar. I've spent my time trying to please you even though it is not enough to make you genuinely happy– I have been very understanding that you prefer wearing that watch or eating dinner at her favourite places over mine, I do the things that remind you of her with you— all because I had hoped that maybe someday you would come to realise the weight of my feelings for you. 

And I really thought I could do it forever, because I love you— little did I know that I was self-sabotaging myself in the process. I’ve gained nothing and it’s all at my expense, I have spent all the love I’ve saved and you received  all that love and I got nothing in return, what the heck am I supposed to do with that?” You poured your heart out, shouting the words when necessary. You felt free after letting it go, you weren’t able to fight back your tears this time, they burned your cheeks as they dripped down your face. They came as a full acceptance of your emotional pain.

Stephen stayed silent, his eyes flickering as he took the time to let all your pent up feelings sink in. He’s never seen you cry hysterically like that and knowing that he was the cause of it dealt him great heartache and his expression softened. Stephen took a step towards you, his hand reaching for your wrist to pull you into a hug but you pulled away, “(Y/N), I’m sorry. I—”

“Don’t touch me! I don’t want to hear it, I don’t want to hear your pity when I already feel pathetic.” You took a deep breath before drowning in yourself. You wanted him to say that you’re wrong, that you’re overthinking it; you wanted him to pull you in and kiss you like it’s your last day on earth, but you didn’t need honesty to come out from him in a form of speech, it was already in his eyes that he accepted the fact that he made the mistake, “Do you love me or am I just a rebound?” You broke the deafening silence.

Stephen lifted his blue orbs and locked themselves into yours, approaching you slowly as if he was walking on glass, afraid that you might push him away again, “No of course not (Y/N). I love you.” His scarred hands slightly tremble as they cupped your cheeks, his thumbs wiping away your tears. His eyes flickering between your eyes, allowing himself to get lost in it. Your hands clutching onto his blazer until your knuckles turn white. 

“But you’re not in love with me. I have to let you go.” It came out as a whisper, it was probably one  of the most difficult things you’ve had to say. Panic took over Stephen after hearing your request, he forced a smile while trying to find the words to say.

“No, don't say that, (Y/N), we can work this out, I can’t lose you too.” He rested his forehead against yours, “Please.” He whispered. 

You shook your head, “I’ve got nothing left to offer you Stephen, I had a hunch it would end like this but I still carried on because I was selfish and wanted you for myself, but I can’t— I can’t do this anymore. All I ask of you now is to figure yourself out and find something that truly makes you happy.” You gently pushed him away, “Please leave.” Before I change my mind. You bit your swollen lip and looked down on the floor.

"Is this really what you want?" He asked quietly, like he's also preparing to let go. You nodded bracing yourself as this maybe the last time that you'll be with him, "I'm sorry (Y/N), I truly am." And you felt the warmth of his hands slip away as he disappeared without another word. Once you didn’t feel his presence anymore, your knees gave in and you dropped on the floor, holding your broken heart in your hands.

#stephen strange #benedict cumberbatch imagine #stephen strange x reader #stephen strange x you #marvel x you #benedict cumberbatch x reader #benedict cumberbatch #benedict cumberbatch x you #doctor strange imagine #doctor strange x you #doctor strange #doctor strange x reader #dr strange x reader #dr strange x you

[mountingpulisic]

REMEDY

a/n : i literally broke my own heart when writing this.

warnings : mention of death of a parent

i remember all of the things that I thought I wanted to be

so desperate to find a way out of my world and finally breathe

right before my eyes, I saw that my heart, it came to life

this ain't easy, it's not meant to be

every story has its scars

you had a contrasting outlook on life growing up.

you had been asked a million times what you wanted to be and you had always responded the same, you just wanted to be happy. 

if your nine year old self could see you now, she'd be disappointed nonetheless. 

she’d ask you exactly when did you lose your sparkle?

she’d ask you why you are desperate for a way out of your world?

you’d tell her how you just wanted to breathe, to wake up and not feel as if the entire weight of the world was on your shoulders. 

you had recently relocated, moving back home to take care of your dad who had fallen ill after a stroke. with your mother no longer in the picture, having died a week before your fourteenth birthday with no siblings, it left you next of kin to look after him. 

you just wish things would’ve been different. 

taking care of your dad meant leaving everything you knew behind. 

your job, your friends, your independence. 

you didn’t mean to sound selfish, he sacrificed everything for you while growing up. so why couldn’t you do the same? 

tucked away in a booth at the back of an old diner you used to come often as a teenager, knees to your chest as you stared out of the window, you didn’t feel the soft gaze of the stranger with the chocolate brown eyes.

having stopped by to grab a quick bite to eat with mason, christian was infatuated with you upon first glance. he didn’t know what exactly had drawn him to you, had it been how small you looked wrapped up in your jumper? or how your shoulders slumped forward as if you had everything weighing down on you? 

christian didn’t know your story but he was sure you had your own scars, brushing off mason’s question of if he wanted to split a serving of the fish and chips, christian made his way towards you.

But when the pain cuts you deep

And when the night keeps you from sleeping

Just look and you will see

That I will be your remedy

When the world seems so cruel

And your heart makes you feel like a fool

I promise you will see

That I will be, I will be your remedy

you had found him on the bathroom floor, hanging on by a thread, suffering yet another stroke. 

your dad’s health wasn’t getting any better, it was declining rapidly and you were having a hard time swallowing the pill that you were about to lose him, the only remaining relative you had left. 

to say it cut deep when the doctor came in asking you if you wanted to keep him on life support, would be a lie. It has cut to a surface you didn’t even know existed in your body. 

christian had come running when he had gotten your call about your dad. he had only met him briefly, answering the door when christian came to collect you for your first date. you had stood behind him pleading with him not to embarrass you by playing the role of the tough dad. 

when he arrived in the hospital room, his heart sank at the sight of you. you had your hand tightly wrapped around your father’s, stroking the back of his, softly singing a song your dad had dedicated to you when growing up. 

“promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance, and when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.” christian could hear the pain in your voice as you sang, voice cracking as a few tears fell from your eyes and down onto your father’s hand. 

feeling paralyzed in the moment, christian didn’t know the right way to comfort you. he had never been put in this situation before, never having to console a loved one during a tough moment like the one unfolding infront of him. 

“ben told me that the hospital’s ice cream isn’t bad, we could go get a cup if you want?” christian shyly asked you, hand rubbing the back of his neck as he shot you apologetic eyes.  

looking up from where your father laid, you couldn’t help but to admire the boy before you. you could tell he was trying his absolute best to comfort you, even though it was in a weird way of asking if you wanted to go try the hospital’s ice cream. 

“ you think they have strawberry?” 

No river is too wide or too deep for me to swim to you

Come whenever, I'll be the shelter that won't let the rain come through

Your love, it is my truth

And I will always love you

Love you, oh

your friend had always stated how sitting in the first row at a funeral felt different, and at the moment you didn’t understand what she meant by that. 

however, now you did. 

all the guests in attendance had expressed their condolences about the loss of your father, telling you how good of man he was. 

you already knew what a great guy your dad was, you didn’t need to be told multiple times by people you hadn’t seen since your mother’s own funeral. nonetheless, you still gave them an appreciated smile and thanked them for attending. 

when the service ended, you found yourself stuck to your seat, staring at the lifeless figure in the coffin. a slight breeze was felt as someone had taken a seat next you, engulfing their hand in yours. 

christian had been by your side through this whole process, speaking to the doctors when you couldn’t find the words, calling everyone to thank them for the flowers, holding your hand as you said your last goodbyes to your childhood hero, he was there through it all. 

“I wish i could’ve at least made him proud before he left.” you whispered, admiring your father’s features as you sat grounded in your seat. you always walked around with a sense of guilt in your heart, feeling as if you didn’t live up to your father’s expectations. you had gone away for uni when he had begged you to stay close, you had broken up with the guy he had begged you to marry, it was as if everything your dad loved, you found a way to rebel against it. 

“he was proud of you, y/n.” christian whispered back just as softly. “he was so proud to call you his daughter.”

“yeah?” you asked, looking at him teary eyed, a noticeable shakiness to your voice.

christian nodded his head as he pulled you closer to him. he knew there was no amount of words or gestures that could fill the empty hole in your heart caused by the passing of your dad. 

“thank you christian, for being here." before he could respond you placed a delicate kiss to his cheek, "you know i love you?"

your lips ghosted over his neck as you whispered your confession, christian had already spoken the words to you before, telling you not to obligated to say it back, wanting you to say it when you truly meant it as well.

you had felt as if the universe sent you the remedy in the form of christian as an apology for the hurt it has and continued to put you through, and you mentally thanked it.

When the pain cuts you deep

And when the night keeps you from sleeping

Just look and you will see

That I will be your remedy

When the world seems so cruel

And your heart makes you feel like a fool

I promise you will see

That I will be, I will be your remedy, oh

#christian pulisic #christian pulisic imagine #christian pulisic x you #christian pulisic x reader #Spotify

[oromaangel]

CREEPIN’ PART 1

A/N: Hey guys, this is the first fic im posting here and the first one I've written since my My Little Pony era so in the words of Adele go easy on me.

Word Count: 0.9k

Summary: You're a terrible hider both you and Shuri know this so after being caught and having your plans foiled so many times you decide to conjure up a more elaborate scheme.

Themes: Fluff, Comedy, Very unserious

Today would be the day.

After numerous attempts in the past two weeks, all of which resulted in blank stares and cocky laughter, today would finally be the day you scare Shuri. Shifting quietly in the uncomfortable dark closet you decide to reminisce on all your failed attempts while waiting for your target to arrive

.

.

.

.

.

Last Week

“Your highness, I should report Y/N is currently down in the lab”

“Again?” Shuri said through a laugh of both humour and disbelief. This was the third time this week you had tried to scare her and every time you’d forgotten to take off your kimoyo beads that revealed your exact location. If she wasn’t so amused by your persistence and terrible hiding skills she would find this little game quite annoying. But she loved you and she loved winning so in that moment Shuri decided to play along…again.

In a dark corner of the lowest levels in the palace you stood still as a Dora. You were proud of yourself. Learning from your past failures you were dressed in black from head to toe and wore the plushest pair of socks you owned.

Your first attempt ended in Shuri asking what an oversized packet of bubble gum was doing sneaking up behind her. Reflecting on that day made you wonder why you thought wearing pink pyjamas and trying to sneak up on someone standing in front of a mirror was a good idea.

Shivering slightly from the cold floor of the lab, Shuri’s comments about your heavy rhino feet giving you away only stung a tiny bit but at the very least gave you some constructive criticism.

You were ready this time, today would be the day.

The zipping of the elevator informed you of her arrival. Your breath ceased and you proceeded with your best impression of a statue.

Even from the top of the lab Shuri could see you. Given her vision had enhanced significantly since drinking the heart shaped herb but even the oldest of council elders could see you standing in the corner trying not to breathe. At first Shuri thought to simply announce her arrival to make you aware of your fourth failure but just as the words were about to leave her lips the spirit of mischievous took over and she reached for the light switch.

At first you were confused and let out the breath you were holding ‘Was she locking up for the night??’ You thought in a panic ‘Oh no I’m gonna be stuck down here’ The perceived reality of the situation set in and you began to frantically feel around in the dark trying to navigate your way back to the elevator.

“Shuri? Shuri! Wait for me please, I'm still down here!” You pleaded to no response. Panic began to rise up your throat, not only were you stuck down here for the night but it was really dark and you hated the dark.

In a split second just as your foot contacted with the second platform you felt something wrap around your waist and pull you to the floor.

The scream that escaped your body would make even a Dora flinch. Your life began to flash before your eyes and you mentally began your apologies to Baast and your ancestors before a familiar laugh rang through your ears.

“Shuri!” You shrieked, eyes blinking feverishly trying to adjust to the low lighting.

“Griot, turn on the lights” Shuri's voice commanded through coughs and heaves and graced you with the gift of vision again. You turned to your loving girlfriend capsized on the floor laughing and your face began to heat up.

“It’s not funny,” You pouted “You could have given me a heart attack!” Shuri turned to your sulking frame, tears still forming in her eyes and cooed at you.

“I’m sorry love but you make it so easy”

.

.

.

.

Present Day

Shuri knew you were there. She knew because when she went to grab something from your shared bedroom your kimoyo beads were on the dresser, something you never do unless you both quarrelled in the morning ‘Must have learnt from last time' she left the room in search of her sneaky lover.

When she enquired her favourite AI assistant about what corner you had tucked yourself into Griot responded with

“I have been asked to withhold that information your Highness, my apologies” Shuri scoffed again, since when does an AI not follow her instructions, maybe her mother was right about that. Nevermind Griot’s disloyalty, she knew where you’d be hiding because it’s the same place you hid the other five times. The lab.

Arriving on the bottom floor the elevator doors opened to a suspiciously quiet laboratory. No heavy breathing, no stifled laughs, and no comically timed stomach grumbles. If Y/N was in here she was doing a great job at not making it known. Shuri shut her eyes. She was in search of any sort of clue to where you’d be hiding. She waltzed slowly through the lab whipping her head round corners and swinging closet doors open in an attempt to startle you. When she finished, it was as though a tornado had made its way through the room and yet still no sign of where her girlfriend was hiding.

‘Maybe we fought in the morning and I forgot?’ Shuri disregarded the silly idea because if you two did fight she would have felt a lot worse throughout the day. Shrugging her shoulders Shuri concluded that you must have been hiding somewhere else and she was going to find you.

A/N: reposting this cause tumblr hid my first one, hopefully this one goes alot smoother

#shuri x reader #shuri udaku #shuri #black panther #wakanda forever

[sunhalf]

@fumalsamakah : “ come cuddle with me. “ jokai baby!!!! / accepting!

"Sir, yes, sir!" it says, saluting, and then pulls a face; they've got a soldier in their head today, and he'll probably be here until at least next week, which is doing weird things to Jocasta's speech patterns. ( a voice : oh, hes, he's the cause of our odd phraseology / another : maybe the chief of stars relishes the stronger title? / another : we do not have time to be horny right now. ) They're by his side quick as a flash, the hallucinations on the walls pulling away as they settle in, facing him, noses touching — chests would be touching, were their hands not pressed between them against him, broad and solid, fingers tapping a tune that Adele is going to release in a year and a half.

( a voice : this would have eviscerated us, a year ago / another : the bad hands consumed our wherewithal / another : bone - laid melody, let it rest with our corpse / another : we're not the only body between us with too much screaming to bear touch. ) Jocasta grins at the closeness and the exception, unafraid and pleased with her own lack of fear. He kisses him, even, a quick thing, easy as a hello. "Missed having us in your arms? We missed it, too. 'Specially 'cause your arms are so strong."

#jocasta : main verse. #queue. #fumalsamakah #answered. #CRYING I MISS THEMMMMMMMMMMMM #throwing this in the top of the queue they are IMPORTANT #i missed writing jocasta....love jo's brain

[gxrlcinema]

dear maria count me in

Bucky + all your expectations of my love are impossible/ surely you know I'm not easy to hold (adele)

hand in unloveable hand

tw: graphic injury, non-graphic depictions of violence, bucky being the biggest fucking asshole (but like, in a way i think i could justify as in-character)

Bucky had done a number of things to piss you off recently. Ever since the breakup he’d fluctuated between ignoring you, openly criticizing you. But almost getting you killed on a mission because he couldn’t care enough to provide backup? Really takes the fucking cake. 

Not since your time being pheremone brainwashed in the Red Room had you been so fucking angry. 

You enter the conference room fuming, slamming the door open and making a beeline for Bucky. He stands with his arms crossed, his face schooled into hard lines.

“What the hell was that?!” you shout. 

Bucky has the audacity to look affronted. His eyes linger on the bloody shell of your right ear. You had asked him multiple times to cover you in the base you guys took down today. You were incredibly lucky that the agent you'd faced alone had been a terrible shot and had barely skimmed your ear before Sam swooped down to pull you out. The asshole had been aiming for your heart.

"Should've been more careful, doll face." His smile is condescending and downright mean.

“Agent Y/l/n,” Steve gives you a pointed look from his seat at the head of the conference table. “Please try not to kill Sergeant Barnes.”

Bucky’s wide eyes are turned on Steve. Steve’s look towards him is pointed too; you deserved that one, pal. You smirk.

“If you could both please take a seat, we have a lot to discuss.”

You huff, but pull back one of the rolling chairs and throw yourself down into it. Bucky sulks next to you. You both cross your arms over your chest. 

“Whatever is going on between you needs to stop, now. Your conduct on missions has been reckless and it has endangered the entire team.”

Bucky scoffs, looks at you. Steve thumps a hand against the glass conference table.

“Agent Y/l/n came very close to losing her life today so I have no idea what’s funny to you right now, Sergeant.”

Bucky scoffs. “If you’re so worried that Agent Y/l/n is going to get hurt, maybe she shouldn’t be on this team.”

You nearly flinch. It’s an insecurity that runs deep in you and Bucky knows that, knows you think you’re not good enough for the team. You turn to look at Bucky.

“There’s not a single other member of this team that you wouldn’t have backed up today. It’s almost like you want me dead.”

You wish he would just say sorry. You can see it clear as day, the anguish that flashes through his eyes. But he rolls them anyways, says, “I mean, I would make things easier.”

“Barnes,” Steve warns. Neither of you listen to him.

You can recall nightmares, tears rolling down his face and “they took you” “I’m so scared that you’ll get hurt and I won’t be fast enough” said between sobs. Had you really hurt Bucky so badly, that he didn’t care for you at all?

Your mind reels from the hurt. Externally, your nostrils flare and your voice goes cold. 

“If you’re so unprepared to prevent a teammate’s death then maybe you’re the one who’s not qualified for this team.”

Bucky’s neck turns red, a familiar sign of his anger. His face remains Winter Soldier blank.  

“I trained you myself. If you can’t keep up during missions it’s because you’re getting sloppy. Besides, it’s not my responsibility to look after you. I’m a tactical master, I’m not here to babysit.”

“Are you?!” rage and hurt overwhelm all your senses, turning your lips loose for half-though words. “Or are you just a scared little boy who acts all tough because he’s terrified he’s an unloveable fucking killing machine!”

“Agent Y/l/n!” Steve roars. It cuts through some of the anger pounding in your ears. 

Bucky’s breath comes in short gasps, his muscled chest heaving although you haven’t touched him. His eyes are wide, face contorted in a pain that’s usually reserved for his nightmares. The victory is savory on your tongue. 

It’s a dirty satisfaction, knowing the truth of Bucky Barnes. Knowing that, no matter how practiced his blank stare is or how beyond human capacity they’ve enhanced his cells, James Barnes is just a broken man who did not have the luxury of mourning his life after it was taken from him. 

You look towards Bucky, ready to see the hurt he so casually dishes out to you written all over his face. But when your eyes meet his, all you see is a dreadful, gut wrenching recognition. 

“Takes one to know one,” Barnes mutters, more to himself than to you. 

You feel like you’ve been doused with cold water and at the exact same time, slapped in the face. Your mouth falls open, perhaps to save yourself the embarrassment of such a staggering defeat, but Steve cuts you off. 

“Y/l/n, you’re dismissed.” 

Your Captain’s voice leaves no room for argument. Not that you have much motivation to stay, the tears pressing against your eyelids threatening to burst through at any moment. 

You nod and storm out without another glance at Bucky.

#ilanswers #ren 🐝 #ipmoshpit #dear maria count me in 🖋 #bucky x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky x you #bucky x female reader #bucky x widow!reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky angst #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes drabble #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes angst

[pelideswhore]

SONGS FOR HELEN OF TROY

seventeen — marina & the diamonds

Used to be a major scale, but the melody went stale […] Could never tell you what happened the day I turned seventeen. The rise of a king and the fall of a queen. Oh, seventeen, seventeen. Oh, you were embarrassed of me because I used my tongue freely. Bet you wished I couldn’t speak, ‘cause when I do, you know I tell you why you appear weak.

ivy — taylor swift

My pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand, taking mine but it's been promised to another. [...] He's gonna burn this house to the ground. How's one to know? I'd live and die for moments that we stole, on begged and borrowed time. So tell me to run, or dare to sit and watch what we’ll become, and drink my husband’s wine.

all you wanna do — aimee atkinson (six)

I think we can all agree I’m the ten amongst these threes and ever since I was a child, I’d make the boys go wild. […] All you wanna do, baby, is touch me. When will enough be enough? See, all you wanna do, all you wanna do, baby, is squeeze me, don’t care if you don’t please me. Bite my lip and pull my hair as you tell me I’m the fairest of the fair.

easy on me — adele

You can’t deny how hard I’ve tried to put you both first but now I give up. Go easy on me, baby. I was still a child, didn’t get the chance to feel the world around me. I had no time to choose what I chose to do, so go easy on me. I had good intentions and the highest hopes, but I know right now that probably doesn’t even show.

farewell wanderlust — the amazing devil

Goodbye to all my darkness, there’s nothing here but light. Adieu to all the faceless things that sleep with me at night. This here is not make-up, it’s a porcelain tomb, and this here is not singing, it’s just screaming in tune because farewell wanderlust, you’ve been ever so kind. You brought me through this darkness but you left me here behind. So long to the person you begged me to be, he’s down, he’s dead, and now take a good long look at what you’ve done to me.

flowers — eva noblezada (hadestown)

What I wanted was to fall asleep, close my eyes and disappear. Like a petal on the stream, like a feather in the air […] Flowers, I remember fields of flowers, soft beneath my heels. I remember someone, someone by my side—turned his face to mine, and I turned away, into the shade. You, the one I left behind, if you ever walk this way, come and find me, lying in the bed I made.

tango dancer — gelsey bell (ghost quartet)

I used to run in the sand, campfire stars in the distance, and I’d gaze into the darkness, and wonder about the void. And I’m haunted by that memory of who I used to be—so gleeful, so blank, so ready. I was empty then, and I’m empty now, but it’s not the same at all […] I’d stay up all night long and all the boys would fall over, oh, how dazzling I could be. But the magic is gone, my joy got bloated and sick.

memory — elaine paige (cats)

Memory, all alone in the moonlight. I can smile at the old days, I was beautiful then. I remember the time I knew what happiness was. Let the memory live again. Every street lamp seems to beat, a fatalistic warning […] Daylight, I must wait for the sunrise. I must think of a new life and I mustn’t give in. When the dawn comes, tonight will be a memory too and a new day will begin.

speechless — naomi scott (aladdin)

Here comes a wave meant to wash me away, a tide that is taking me under. Swallowing sand, I’ve got nothing to say, my voice drowned out in the thunder. But I won’t cry, and I won’t start to crumble. Whenever they try to shut me or cut me down, I won’t be silenced. You can’t keep me quiet […] Written in stone, every rule, every word. Centuries old and unbending. ‘Stay in your place, better seen and not heard’, but now that story’s ending.

girls against god — florence + the machine

What a thing to admit, that when somebody looks at me with real love, I don’t like it very much. It kinda feels like I’m being crushed. Is that something you’d like to discuss? […] And in my darkest fantasies, I’m the picture of passivity, waiting for you side of stage, suppressing all my private rage, but as my sister said, I’d probably last six days. […] But it’s good to be alive, crying into cereal at midnight. Oh, God, you’re gonna get it. You’ll be sorry that you messed with us.

exile — taylor swift

I can see you starin’, honey, like he’s just your understudy, like you’d get your knuckles bloody for me. Second, third and hundredth chances. Balancin’ on breaking branches. Those eyes add insult to injury. I think I’ve seen this film before, and I didn’t like the ending. I’m not your problem anymore, so who am i offending now! You were my crown, now I’m in exile seeing you out.

long story short — taylor swift

The knife cuts both ways; if the show fits, walk in it ‘til your high heels break. And I fell from the pedestal, right down the rabbit hole. Long story short, it was a bad time. Pushed from the precipice, clung to the nearest lips. Long story short, it was the wrong guy. Now I’m all about you, I’m all about you. Actually, I always thought I must look better in the rear view [...] Long story short, it was a bad time. Long story short, I survived.

dream girl evil — florence + the machine

Oh, did you miss me? Walk on water just to kiss me? Oh, come and get me, drag me out and destroy me. I’ve been expecting you, I’m ready. Deliver me that bad news, baby. Am I your dream girl? You think of me in bed but you could never hold me and like me better in your head. Make me evil, then I’m an angel instead—at least you’ll sanctify me when I’m dead […] Did I disappoint you? Did mummy make you sad? Do I at least remind you of every girl that made you mad?

broken glass — rachel platten

I’m on a highway full of red lights, I’ve lost so many long nights, felt words that cut like knives. I know they’re gonna say what they wanna […] I have been patient, but I’m not waiting anymore. I’m gonna dance on broken glass, broken glass. I’m gonna make that ceiling crash, that ceiling crash. So what? Still got knives in my back. So what? So I’m tied to the tracks, yeah, I’m gonna dance on broken glass.

trust in me — scarlett johansson (the jungle book)

Shut your eyes, trust in me. You can sleep, safe and sound, knowing I am around. Slip into silent slumber, sail on a silver mist. Slowly but surely, your senses will seize to resist. Just relax, be at rest, like a bird in a nest. Trust in me, just in me.

#greek mythology #greek myth #helen of troy #helen of sparta #iliad #marina #florence and the machine #taylor swift #six the musical #the amazing devil #adele #hadestown #rachel platten #ancient greece #mythology #greek gods #mythos #dance fever #dream girl evil #girls against god #greek mythos #trojan war #homer #classics #literature #songs #character song #female character #feminism #tagammemnon

[thelavenderwitchhh]

Heya~

Many moons ago I wrote a Black Butler fanfic. Looking back on it, it was hot garbage

However, there was potential.

So now I'm back out of my creative funk and wanna give it another go so here it is ya'll

Ciel Phantomhive, alongside his loyal butler Sebastian Michaelis, are sent to Paris for an investigation. A string of murders has been happening, suspected to be by a gang that is causing an uproar in the city. When interviewing the latest victim's daughter, Adele DeRose, the two are very suspicious of her. Sebastian knows she is hiding something, whether Adele is aware of it or not. While Adele knows Sebastian is hiding something from her, and soon realizes the truth of her mother's past, and her involvement with Sebastian. Sebastian's past before ever meeting Ciel will come to haunt him, and he will have to decide whether to ignore it or face the demon he has unknowingly created.

Sebastian is pretty much a dad so let's give him a lil demon daughter to mentally destroy lol

♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤♡♤

Chapter 1

 The carriage shook and raddled as the little Lord and his tall butler sat before one another. Ciel looked out the window with a bored expression as they passed the boutiques and bakeries; the letter from Her Majesty tucked between his gloved fingers.

"I hate Paris." Ciel grumbled to himself.

"Why is that so, Master? You don't enjoy the city of love?" Sebastian grinned, a light tease in his voice. Ciel rolled his eye.

"It is overrated and boring. It's dirty and full of crime."

"Ah, perhaps you are right. Crime is the reason why you are here, after all." Sebastian remarked. Ciel looked down at the letter and gave a single nod.

"As the Queens's watchdog it is my duty. Though it should be an easy case to solve. A simple gang leading on a string of murders? That's child's play, the police here should be able to solve as something as simple as that." Ciel said dryly.

"True, though I would not underestimate the concerns of the Queen. It may be more serious than you realize."

"She is only concerned because the last victim was a family friend of hers. She wants to avenge them."

"Humans like yourself have that all too much in common, don't they, my Lord?" Sebastian flashed him a devilish smirk. Ciel glared at him coldly.

"Let's just get this over with before Lizzie finds out I went to Paris without her." He grumbled darkly, taking a manilla folder out from his coat and began to skim the paragraphs. "The latest victim was Yvette DeRose, a 34 year old single mother killed in her townhouse, found by her daughter. I suppose we should go and speak with her daughter. She may know something; something she might have not told the police."

When Ciel realized Sebastian was silent, his eye looked up at him. Sebastian's ruby red eyes were wide, looking down at the carriage floor. Ciel arched a brow, setting the papers down on his lap.

"Sorry, am I boring you with my investigation?" Ciel's sharp words brought Sebastian's attention back, his eyes meeting his.

"I apologize, my Lord. The name of the victim sounded very familiar to me. Though I'm sure I am mistaking it for someone else." The demon recovered quickly, flashing him a small smile. Ciel stared at him with his cold, azure eyes, as if he was reading him. It was a rare sight to see his composed and calm butler out of sorts, even if it was only for a moment.

"I see. Let's go pay her daughter a visit then, shall we?"

The two Englishmen came up to the flat on the southside of Paris. It was a dirty street, the long line of ivory stone townhouse running down the street. Green ivy wasting away against the cold air as it grasped the stone houses for dear life. Sebastian sat there as a sudden wave hit him, raddling him to his very core. His head snapped towards Ciel, quickly reaching out and grabbing his arm before he could move.

"Something is here." He said in a low voice to Ciel. Ciel's eye widened at his sudden remark.

"What are you on about?"

"I...I am unsure..." Sebastian trailed off, trying to understand what this sense is "There is most certainly a human here. A child, at that. But I sense another demon."

"A demon?" Ciel repeated, his eyebrows furrowed together. "How can that possibly be?"

"I wish I had a clearer explanation, my Lord. But I defiantly sense that something here is very off. One of my own kind is here." Sebastian said darkly, his eyes trailing away as he thought hard about this.

"Then there is no time to waste. If there is a demon amongst all of this, you will take care of it. That is an order." Ciel demanded sternly. A small grin curled over the demons' lips and he set go of his master.

"Of course, my young Lord."

Cautiously, the two came out of the carriage, they approached the victim's townhouse. Sebastian knocked on the door and the two looked at each other, giving one other a single knowing nod. The door opened, a small and petite girl looking through them at the crack of the door?"

"What is it?" She asked in French, her voice small and slightly concerned.

"Good evening, my name is Ciel Phantomhive. I've come to ask you a few questions about your mothers' recent death. May we come in?" Ciel replied, all in English. The girl looked confused, glancing up at the tall butler.

"Master, your French is well enough to speak to her. I don't think she understands English." Sebastian sighed, looking back at the young girl with a small and soft smile.

"My name is Sebastian Michaelis. My Master was sent here to investigate your mother's death. May we come in and ask a few questions?" Sebastian asked as politely as he could in perfect French. The girl hesitated for a moment before opening the door fully. She looked no more than twelve, her white blonde hair tied back in a bun. Her skin was as white as snow, her red wine eyes large with curiosity and confusion.

"I have been asked a numerous number of questions. I don't know what more I can do for you people." She said, her tone a bit sharper this time.

"My master will only be a moment. Please, it will help us solve this case more thoroughly with your help. He was sent by her Majesty herself." Sebastian flashed her a charming smile. The girl did not seem moved by him, glaring at Ciel.

"But he is a child." She said flatly.

"Well that I understood clearly!" Ciel barked. The girl huffed and crossed her arms.

"Fine. But make it quick, I am exhausted answering all these tedious questions." The French girl sighed and stepped aside for them to enter. Sebastian smiled at her, slightly bowing at her as Ciel and him stepped aside the small townhouse.

"What is your name?" Ciel asked her in French this time.

"Adele." She answered as she closed the door behind them.

"Do you speak any English?"

"Eh," She shrugged, moving her thumb and index finger close together to show she only spoke little of it "I have recently been seeing a tutor to speak it, but stopped when my mother wasn't able to afford it anymore." She explained as she led them to the tiny living room. It was indeed small, but large and high windows illuminated the room. She gestured towards the blush pink sofa for Ciel to sit in. He did, and she took a seat by him in a matching armchair. Sebastian stood on the other side of the room, watching them interact. Sebastian was on high alert, still feeling the presence of a demon very close by. Ciel noticed this, looking at him at the corner of his eye before gazing back at Adele.

"Are you living with anyone? A guardian or something?"

"Ah...no." Adele said softly, smoothing out her sky-blue skirts. "It is just me here at the moment."

"Why is that? Nobody took you in after your mother's death?"

Adele's lips pressed together nervously, unable to meet his cold gaze. "I will be sent to an orphanage if I tell the police I have no other family to take me in. So, I told them my aunt and uncle from the countryside are coming soon to take me in. But do not fret, I can manage on my own." She grinned softly. Ciel blinked a moment when she gave him that grin. Why on earth did it seem so...familiar?

"I see. It is not my business who provides for you, if you can handle it yourself." He said coolly with a wave of his hand "Now please, tell me what happened the day you found your mother? Anything suspicious going on? We have reason to believe there is a gang behind this."

"Oh, how shocking." She said sarcastically, resting her cheek against her fist "My mother was out constantly, I wouldn't see her for days on end sometimes. Yet in the last few weeks, she stopped going out so much."

"Is that so? Do you know why that is?"

"We hardly spoke to one another. If I dare asked where she was, she could call me a noisy child and it was un-ladylike. My mother was a very private person so I stopped asking."

"Was she any different when she came home? More reserved than before?"

"She was more drunk, that is for sure." Adele scoffed. Ciel let out a small sigh and nodded.

"I see. Do you think she was a part of this gang by chance?"

"Maybe." She casually shrugged. Ciel was a bit taken aback by this short response. He couldn't help but feel like she was hiding something.

"You seem rather unbothered by this possibility."

"I am unbothered by anything my mother has done. I have seen her at her worst, her being a part of a gang would be the least surprising thing to me."

"I gather you two were not close."

"Not at all." Adele shook her head. Ciel's icy eyes burned into hers, like water trying to put out the red flames in her eyes.

"Where were you the day you found her?"

"I was at my tutor's house when I came home and found her dead in the kitchen. I ran outside and called for help. She was a bloody mess; her head was bashed open."

"You said you stopped receiving tutor lessons." Ciel pointed out sharply. Adele paused, a small smile curling over her lips.

"Yes, for English." Adele replied, in English this time. This made her French accent sound all the heavier. "But not for piano. My mother made me chose which one to drop, so I chose English."

Ciel's glare drove deeper into Adele, as it trying to dig the truth out of her. His eye shot over at Sebastian and then back at her.

"I see. The police reports show that there was no sign of a break-in or a struggle. Did your mother know anyone that was a part of a gang? Anyone she knew that struck you as odd or dodgy?"

"All the men my mother brough home were just like that." Adele snorted, going back to French as she crossed her arms and leaned back in the chair. "They very well could have been a part of any gang. They mistreated her but were gone by the morning. It was rare she brought home the same man. It was like every time I did my laundry, she had a new man in her arms. I almost considered to stop washing my clothes."

"Did your mother do anything for a living?"

"She worked at a boutique here and there, but she never kept a steady job. We mostly kept afloat by my grandfather's inheritance. Where that money is or what she's done with it, I have no idea."

"From her frequent absence I can only assume that she might have been a part of this unknown gang."

"It would not surprise me. But for all we know, she wasn't even a part of any gang. This could have been a random killing. All the other murders were."

"With no sign of a break in or struggle? Sounds unlikely."

"True, but I do not know what else to tell you." She shrugged "You are asking me the same things the police have asked me, and they haven't gotten far. If it's this gang you want to find so badly, I know nothing about them. I know nothing about my mother. You're asking the wrong person the questions."

Ciel paused a moment, before a smirk crept over his mouth "Your mother was single, yes? What do you know about your father?"

"Again, nothing. She never spoke about him, and when I asked her about him on the few rare occasions, she said it was nothing for me to be concerned about and left it at that. If she was not concerned about my father's where abouts, then neither am I."

Ciel's eyes squinted a bit at her words. He let out a small huff and stood to his feet. "Very well, perhaps I am asking the wrong person questions. I thank you for your time, Miss. DeRose. I will inform you if I find out anything else, if you wish. My goal is to solve this investigation and stop these murders. If you find out anything new, do not hesitate to contact me. I will be staying in a villa in the center of Paris, about a twenty-minute carriage ride from here."

Adele nodded and stood to her feet. "Very well. I wish you luck on your...investigation." she said as she escorted them to the front door. She opened it, Ciel tipping his top hat at her before exiting. Sebastian followed behind him, his and Adele's eyes meeting. Their gaze held for a few moments before Sebastian nodded and followed his young Master out. The sun was setting as they got back in the carriage, the autumn sky orange and purple.

"She was odd." Ciel commented once the carriage took off "I find her rather untrustworthy."

"Indeed." Sebastian agreed, though his mind seemed elsewhere.

"Did you still sense the presence of a demon while we were there?

"Yes...but it was faint." Sebastian nodded, raising a gloved knuckle to his chin "It was rather peculiar. I certainly sensed a demon, yet there was no threat to it."

"Adele is defiantly hiding something. Could she have a contract with a demon as well?"

"She could be, it is hard for me to tell. One of her wishes could have been to rid of her mother. Yet I still sense that she still has her soul and there are no clear seals on her body."

"This is true, I did not see any on her either. And if she had a demon as loyal as you are, they would have been there with her instead of her saying she lives alone. However, based on what she said, I can only suspect Yvette was involved in this gang. I'm wondering if her father is a part of said gang. They could have fought about something which led to her murder. But it doesn't explain the other murders."

"Could Yvette have been a part of the murders? Perhaps she wanted to come to an end of it and in fear she would report him to the police he killed her."

"She very well could have. But it does not explain why you felt the sense of another demon..." Ciel trailed off, thinking hard "Later tonight I want you to go back to the townhouse and investigate. See if you can find anything Adele or Yvette may have been hiding. If Yvette was a part of this gang, it just leads us one step closer to them."

"As you wish, my Lord." Sebastain grinned.

The fiery sky turned into black velvet, small stars piercing through it like holes. Sebastian stood outside Adele's townhouse by a lamppost, the small flame casting wicked shadows over the demon's face. In a flash he jumped up two stories, gracefully landing like a feather onto the side of the house and opened a window. He climbed into the dark room; the townhouse silent as the house slept. He crept through the dark room, realizing it was Yvette's. The smell of the unkept room hit him like a ton of bricks, weighing down in his stomach.

"It really is her," He murmured softly to himself. He stood in the middle of the bedroom for a moment, letting her scent seep into his skin. Truly, after all these years. He never wished to smell her sweet scent again. Yet here he was. Fate was a funny thing, even for demons such as him. But he agreed with his young Master, the sooner they got out of Paris the better.

He began to quietly rummage through her things, finding nothing out of the ordinary or of any significance. He then moved to her writing desk, pulling out draws and sorted through her paperwork in the dark. He reached out to the last drawer, finding it locked. With such grace and ease, he gave a powerful pull. The small sound of the lock breaking filled the room, and he smirked as he pulled the drawer back. He tiled his head to the side, pulling out a stack of dusty letters. He began to read them, his blood red eyes going wide as he skimmed over the words.

"I miss your touch..."

"How dare you leave me? Use me? How I was a fool..."

"It is yours; I am certain. Please, what will I do...?"

"What on earth are going doing in my mother room!?" Shrieked a voice. Sebastain head snapped over, looking at the doorway. There stood Adele, her eyes like pools of blood as the candle she held flickered in the reflection. Sebastian dropped the letters, the papers floating down to the ground as he stared into her eyes. So it was as he suspected. There was in fact, a demon in this small townhouse.  

#black butler sebastian #black butler #black butler ciel #ciel phantomhive #sebastian michaelis #black butler fanfiction #dadbastian #fanfic #fanfiction

[nolanhollogay]

“i feel like i’m losing you.”

gale being winedrunk and angsting about her tumultuous relationship with her son? more likely than you think

+

Tate wasn't entirely sure why he got invited to a frat's karaoke night, seeing as neither he nor Chad were affiliated with them, but he wasn't going to complain. It was nice to get off campus for once, and even though his hands were still shaking with nerves because his paranoia would never let him fully enjoy himself, he was having fun. Chad had dedicated a raunchy Bruno Mars song to him, he hadn't been laughed off the stage as he sang Bidi Bidi Bom Bom, some guy named Owen was butchering an Adele song. All in all, it was a pretty good night.

Chad was next to him, not so sneakily stealing sips of his drink, hand warm as it sat on the inside of his thigh.

Tate grabbed his hand, locking their fingers together. "Which of these guys do you know again?"

Chad drank his own beer and grimaced at the taste. "Kyle G. The Indian guy with the glasses, and the.. you know, the Muppet face. We have Women's Lit together. We share notes."

"And how many Kyles are there in this frat?" he teased.

Chad's response was drowned out by Tate's phone ringing on the table. They both froze, and Chad gripped his hand tighter.

"Why do y'all look like you seen a ghost?" One of the frat bros, his name started with a D, asked.

Another one of them, Marty, smacked his shoulder. "They're from Woodsboro, dude."

"Oh shit," D replied, as breathless as Tate felt.

The caller ID said it was Tate's mom, which only made the sinking feeling in his stomach worse.

Chad scooped it up. "I got it."

"Chad," Tate warned, but before he could say anything else, Chad was swiping to accept the call.

"Hello?" he said, and the whole table waited with baited breath as the other person responded. "No, uh, he's, he's right here. Yeah, right next to me. Yeah, he's alright," Chad turned to look at him, whispering, "It's your mom, and she's crying?"

Confusion flooded his nervous system, fitting in right alongside the fear. "What?"

Chad handed the phone over, albeit reluctantly, and watched Tate press it to his ear.

She was in fact crying, quiet sobs and sniffles filling his left ear. "Tate, is that you?"

He'd never seen her cry, or heard it, for that matter. Some part of him kind of assumed she just couldn't. It made his stomach hurt, just the sound of it. "Yeah, mom. Is everything okay?"

That sent her into another fit of tears and Tate felt nauseous. The audience wasn't helping. The frat bros were watching him like he was prime time entertainment. It made his skin crawl.

He met Chad's eyes. "Come with me to the bathroom." He had scoped it out when they first arrived after making sure he knew for certain where all the possible exits were. There was a window that'd be pretty easy to get out of if it came down to it. And it'd be somewhat private.

Chad got up without another word, still holding his hand, and let him lead the way.

-

Once they were in the bathroom, Tate interrupted his mother's cries. "Mom, what's wrong? Why are you crying?"

She blubbered, exclaiming, "It's my fault!" and he could feel bile in the back of his throat.

Chad rubbed his back, sending him a frown, his eyebrows creased in worry.

"Mom?" Tate asked, voice coming out small. "Mommy," he muttered, sounding so young that it frightened him for a second, "You need to tell me what's wrong because you're freaking me the fuck out. Are you okay? Where's Brooks?"

"He's asleep. I'm okay. I'm in your bed. I'm sorry. I'm sorry for calling," The waterworks started again, "Sorry for freaking you out. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Tater Tot."

The nickname knocked him down like a gust of wind and he pressed his forehead to Chad's shoulder. The last two people to call him that were his dad, and then Amber. Hearing it was like being stabbed all over again.

"Mom," Tate breathed. "What do you want?"

"I feel like I'm losing you." It was an admission that he wasn't sure what to do with. "I lost Dewey and I know it's my fault, the fact that you don't like me, but I don't want to lose you too. I can't, Tate, I can't."

Sounding far away, he heard Brooks in the background. "Gale, what are you doing in here, babe?"

A moment later, he could hear the phone being taken from her, despite her protests, and then Brooks was in his ear. "Sorry, Tate. She had a lot to drink tonight. She probably won't even remember this in the morning."

And wasn't that the story of his fucking life?

"I'm gonna put her to bed. You have a nice night, alright? Tell Chad I say hi," Brooks said, before he hung up.

Chad's hand was tracing shapes on Tate's back under his sweatshirt. "That was.. a lot."

Tate snorted, "Yeah. Brooks says hi."

"You wanna talk about it?"

He shook his head. "Not right now. I'm sure the bros think we've been gutted and hung by our entrails by now–"

"Dark."

"–We should get back."

Chad didn't look pleased, but he didn't argue. "Okay. Can you get another peach crush so I can have it?"

Tate rolled his eyes, but let himself be pulled from the bathroom. "Buy your own drinks!"

#ok last one let me act like i have work in the morning #tate riley weathers #tate asks #asks #my writing #leaf tag 🌿

[doctor-fancy-pants]

Finding pieces of yourself that you thought you'd lost

I have no idea why, but after several years of not doing so, somehow this year I started writing songs again. After shipboard karaoke reminded me that it’s not just Broadway While Driving, I can actually sing and people like it, I’ve been thinking about recording something.

That being said, I never developed the “ah this song is in this key and should have these chords” skill, as that was Shayne’s job as our lead guitar, and he was VERY good at finding the bones of a song if I sang him a melody line.

He’s a metal guitarist and has the requisite chops for that — mostly what I’m after is a folk/rock vibe, so we parted ways musically many years ago.

Meanwhile: I played bass and sang. I was… okay?

(I am much better now, vocally - but from memory this gig at the Old Bar in 2009 went pretty well. That's Grace the Bass, by the way. Easy action Ibanez that didn't brutalise my hands to keep the strings down. And yes, that is my hair colour under stage lighting. Rach has pretty much nailed it in my Sea Witch profile pic.)

I played bass because no one else wanted to and I figured if I was going to pick up a stringed instrument, low end and four strings seemed easier. Also bass riffs are super fun ("Baby, I got you on my mind...").

I set all that aside when the band disbanded and the PhD got painfully intense.

I never developed the skillset of figuring out the root-note-harmonic bones of a song - so I figured I was probably not a good songwriter. Like. At all.

But the songs have just come at me this year, and old songs I wrote that I’d forgotten about, and those I always remembered…

And this is the space between Xmas and New Year. This is the time between finishing the voyage and finding the threads of my terrestrial existence.

This is the perfect time to drag out my acoustic and my bass guitar, dig out my tuners, and tune them both.

A perfect time to pick up “what is a song I know that is easy to play” so I can learn enough basic guitar to help with songwriting.

(the easiest option for me would involve the piano, which I can actually play. Again, not a virtuoso, but I muddle through. However, my great grandmother’s piano is still up on the mountain.)

A perfect time to grab some bass tabs for songs I know because that will give me a jumpstart since at one point I could, in fact, play bass.

(side note: Adele is extremely fun to sing, but there are two songs on the first album that seem to be carried by bass lines, and that has my attention.)

A perfect time to do all this and not feel self-conscious because normally there’s a voice in my head that tells me not to do this.

That voice can fuck right the fuck off. I don’t expect anything amazing to come out of my songs. I just want to have a record of them. I want to be able to play it for someone and say “I made this, and I am happy with what I’ve made.”

That voice that tells me I’m not a musician and never have been…?Jesus fkn christ I can’t actually play guitar and haven’t tried in years and my fingers still found the frets for the chords I do know without even fucking trying. There’s something there.

And in terms of practice and physical skills, I think about playing Beat Saber, and how I’m fucking good at a rhythm dance game, because I’ve played hundreds of hours.

That reminds me I can acquire physical skills.

At least, I can when the voice in my head - the one that says I look ridiculous- shuts the fuck up. Because who the fuck cares if I look ridiculous? I might as well just lean all the way in and get somewhere.

I haven't done any Beat Saber bragging in a while, but I managed to get through BTS Not Today on Expert+ and score an S on the first try, which is not too shabby.

And I’m going for achievable goals: not aiming to be a virtuoso. I just want to be able to find the structure. I want to piece together the parts of the song I don’t have, and build it up the way it deserves.

Breaking that down further: I know I need interim goals to learn new skills. It’s why I had trouble trying to teach myself coding — I need an immediate use-case, and I didn’t have one.

So: I’ll learn a song I know.

Magpie (Mountain Goats) is a set of chords I already know - bam.

More immediately: Need a capo and some picks, because I have no idea where mine ended up. Fortunately those are very cheap items, and there’s a music shop in Upwey, very close at hand.

One step (fret? Semitone?) at a time.

-Doc out

#music #try new things #rediscover the old things #treat your dreams with respect #Beat Saber #between Xmas and New Year is the vertex of the parabola #that means you get to hover for a bit and it seems like flying is possible #projects

[a-moment-captured]

Wait, because I agree with you. I also feel like music is missing something. But I’m not sure if it can be pinpointed to one thing but more like a combination of things. Sometimes people use the excuse of people being older and that’s why they have a problem with some of today’s music but I’m GenZ and even I notice something is missing. I actually find myself listening to alot of older music and watching old performances now. If you have any music recommendations I’d love to hear them. Any genre

Oh anon, you are sending me down my favorite road!

I like the music today but it’s not about being older and just not liking something. I’m not old by any means! Being 30 is not old Or mean you don’t get todays music

Most of the songs that become viral, that people love on TikTok, a top 10 song for a few weeks, or just the “it” person of the moment, they don’t have the longevity factor. They just don’t!

20 years from now, no one will be talking about a good 75% of the music today. They will talk about Chris Stapleton, Adele, Taylor Swift, and maybe Harry Styles and maybe Jack Harlow:

The substance I’m talking about is definitely found in a few of their songs. Especially with Adele. Taylor is just up and down for me and a lot is repetitive 🤷🏽‍♀️.

Chris Stapleton is the singer they will talk about in 20 years. He had the longevity. He has the voice. He writes songs that reach your soul no matter what they are about. That’s what this generation needs. Not the next TikTok viral song.

I make it a point to turn older songs on in the car with my son, niece, and nephew. I want them to know about The Eagles, Al Green, Journey, Prince, Salt n Peppa, tupac, NSYNC, Whitney Houston, Janet Jackson, Nelly, Brandy, boys II men, nas, usher, Reba mcentire, brooks and Dunn, faith hill, George strait, George jones, Johnny cash, frank sinatra, the temptations, Aretha Franklin, And the list goes on! I want to give them a variety!

I will tell you that my all time favorite video and favorite performances across the board is BB King with Eric Clapton, Robert Cray, and Jimmie Vaughan playing The Thrill is Gone. Hands down the best performance there ever was.

While mentioning Chris Stapleton, go watch his Grammy performance and CMA Awards performance of Cold. Omg will it blow you away! Watching reaction videos of Chris Stapleton is one of my favorite things to do on YouTube lol.

I’ve been on a Journey kick as of late. So from them:

Faithfully

Who’s Cryin Now

Don’t stop believing

Open arms

Lights

Eagles (my favorite band of all time)

hotel California

Desperado

Take it easy

Witchy woman

Lyon’ eyes

Take it to the limit

Country songs to listen to:

Stand by your man — Tammy Wynette(watch the show on showtime and George jones and Tammy Wynette)

Carrying your love with me — George strait

You never even called me by my name — David Allan coe (the version with Merle haggard, Waylon Jennings, and Charlie pride) you will love this song! I’ve lost count the number of times I sung this while out in a bar!

Fancy — Reba McEntire

Breathe — Faith Hill

Whiskey Lullaby — Brad Paisley

Some more random ones:

Tracy Chapman!!! Please!!! Especially “Give me one reason” and “Fast Cars”.

Al Green: the man has one of the best voices of ALL TIME! My son has to listen to “Love and Happiness” on the way to school every morning! But also “Let’s stay together” and “how can you men a broken heart”

Lynard Skynard’s “Simple Man” is truly just a great song. The meaning behind it and just the entire song is just so great.

Anything by Eric Clapton! Wonderful tonight, Cocaine, Layla (the mtv unplugged is my favorite version)

A few more:

unchained melody— righteous brothers

Anything ACDC(check out the live performance of Hells Bells in River Plate)

Living on a prayer — Bon Jovi

Early Mariah Carey—just the entire Butterfly album or DayDream album

Eminem

To understand Eminem, you have to start at the beginning. I watched his progression from the beginning and it is amazing what he was able to do. The man is one of the greats when it comes to rappers. No one will ever break the records he set. The Marshall Mathers LP and The Eminem Show are two of the greatest of all time!

#jack harlow #jackman thomas harlow #jackman harlow #music #Eminem #90s hits #90s r&b #Mariah Carey #boys ii men #dr dre #eric clapton #bb king #Taylor swift #Adele #harry styles #tiktok #chris stapleton #journey #Al green #the eagles #anon

[umbralsound-xiv]

The renovations of the Willows were finally done, after long last... The Shroud has taken a toll on my little known home, and so i saught Moe to help me ensure it wouldn’t simply... Collapse.

But, it’s all well and good, now. More spacious, almost. It has a gentle sort of gloom that i find some safety in. Some peace.

I hoped that Laurent, Duskwight though he was, would enjoy the newfound surroundings.

Bexy Amalaryssia lingers on the sofa, eyes closed. Not quite... Sleeping, at least not judging by the way her ears shifted to and fro, but simply... Being. Only the sound of the Shroud was audible, being so far from the beaten path so few could have ever stumbled across it by accident. The willows softly rustled against the windows, a shrill birdcall distantly heard... At least, until a familliar set of footsteps approached the door. Bexy's lips slide into an easy smile, as she simply calls out upon his arrival, opting not to wait until he knocked. "...Come in, love."

Laurent Mercier made his way through the woods (which he swore were slowly getting denser over time), following the familiar turns and twists in the road.  As the familiar abode came into view, he smiled and hurried forward.  When her voice reached his ears, he sighed happily and complied, swinging the door open without so much as slowing his stride.  ".... Little wonder ambush parties were never a concern of yours with hearing like yours, eh love?  All done with the remodeling then, are we?"  He peered around at the considerable foliage, humming as he took in the newly furnished kitchen and living area.  He smiled and made his way over to the Seeker, reaching a hand out for hers.  "It's so... roomy, now.  I like it."

Bexy Amalaryssia rises as he pulls into view, drawn to him like a moth to the flame, hand settled at his waist. "...My hearing is no better nor worse than any other Miqo'te. It's just... Quiet, here. Peaceful." Furnishing him with a warm smile, taking the outstretched hand in her gloved own. "...The structure had become a little more frail than i would have liked. But Moe managed to keep it together. The plants are..." She gazes up at them. "...A nice addition. Maybe i'll ask Adelle if she can stop them growing so much without killing them..."

Laurent Mercier smirked and leaned against her touch, pressing more fully against her fingers as he savored the affection.   "If you say so, I suppose you probably know far more Miqo'te than I do."  His fingers wrapped themselves around her palm as he followed her gaze throughout the house.  "Aye, she's a magician, and you can't convince me otherwise.  I much enjoy the additions of color, myself, I'd not be disappointed to hear that she found success."   Smiling, he leaned in to steal her lips for a lingering moment, squeezing his fingers around her hand before the Elezen quietly murmured,  "I've missed you terribly since this morning, love.  Just thought you ought to know"

Laurent Mercier beams with delight at you.

Bexy Amalaryssia curls a grin at his quip, smiling against his lips. "...As have i. Though my sun has not been an especially difficult or taxing one. Though..." Her fingers slowly lace with his. "...I'm glad you came out all this way to see me. I know the Willows are not the easiest to get to..." She turns her head, to rub it with some firm force against his chest. "...How has your sun been?"

Laurent Mercier simply allowed his wife to nuzzle against him, her customary habit and one that he was all too happy to go along with.  "Well, I got a good workout in after a lazy morning, then spent a few hours doing paperwork and odd tasks in and around the company house.  But, all of the deadlines are met, the evening is free."

Bexy Amalaryssia: "Then... We can enjoy the peace, and the quiet. I like the bustle of the company house, i do... But there's something to be said for the privacy here..." She walks, fingers still laced around his, to trace her free hand over the stump-like table in the middle of the room. "...So few know of it. Yourself, and a few others." A pause. "...Clan Karahli, too.”

My home borders on their territory. It’s a good relationship. I’m there if they need me, and they keep an eye on things when i’m not here.

Aside that? Only some few people know.

Adelle does, and Moe, of course. Mist, not that she bothers to visit.

Tsaivarod, of course... I wonder how she’s getting on with Daidukul?

I’ve told Sayuri. But otherwise... So very few.

Laurent Mercier was content to be dragged along by his companion, loathe to leave her for even a moment yet.   "Aye, the company house is pleasant enough, but not so much a place to recharge...  Ah, I... suppose that makes sense, Zhav at least.  How have they been, if you know?  It's been some time, hope she and Mhira and the lot are doing well enough.   It feels like opportunities to enjoy peace and quiet are growing further between and shorter in length."

Bexy Amalaryssia: "Well enough. I saw Zhav last sennight... We caught up. Mhira is snowed under as usual, but i haven't had so much time to speak with her." Her fingertips quietly drum on the table as she considers, expression falling only a hint. "...But, we must enjoy them while we can, hm? They never do last long enough..."

Laurent Mercier: "Well, that sounds about par for the course."  The Elezen chuckled as his eyes held his wife's for a long moment.  "Isn't that what makes the joy and love in life so precious, though?  Why it's worth fighting so hard for, and never letting it go?  Especially with everything going on elsewhere, peace and quiet can sometimes seem so fleeting... But it's these moments, where I can sit here and simply gaze at you, stroking your hand like this, that made all the struggling and fighting worth it in the end... Because tonight, I can simply sit here and be with you."

Bexy Amalaryssia: "...It is these moments i cherish most..." Bexy murmurs, reaching up to gently caress his cheek, before her hand drops back to the front of his chest. "...Rolanberry tart?" She asks, in an almost playful manner. "...I knew you'd be coming, so..." She side-glances the aforementioned dessert, which has around a third missing. "...I didn't eat -all- of it. At least not yet." You beam with delight at Laurent Mercier.

Laurent Mercier grinned down at the Seeker, his pearly teeth flashing at her briefly.  "Ah, jump straight to the tart, no thought for dinner?  .... Well, I suppose, life is short.  Rolanberry tart sounds delightful.  Thank you, love.  Would you care for a drink to go with dessert?  Perhaps a summer wine?"

Bexy Amalaryssia: "You always pick them best." She twirls herself beneath his arm, before fleeing to the table. "...We're not beholden to any rules, Laurent." His name was spoken with some playful mischief. "...We can have dessert for dinner. Who's going to know? Who'd reprimand us anyway, if they did?" A berry is plucked from one of the edges, sinking her teeth into it with a hum."

Laurent Mercier laughed at the rambunctious Miqo'te as she chided him and made off with her ill-gotten treasure.  "I'll know, Bexy."  Her name was spoken with equal emphasis and mischief.  "Maybe I'll reprimand you.  What sort of punishment is befitting 'dessert before dinner', mm?"  His lips curled into a coy smile as he wandered over and plucked a berry from the top of the sweet, biting the juicy red treat and offering a slight nod of approval at the flavor.  He muttered an incomprehensible comment, then offered a smirk to Bexy.

Bexy Amalaryssia: "Hmmm..." She watches, as he bites the berry, staring a little longer than she otherwise might. "...More dessert?" Her answer was delivered with a chuckle, furnishing him with another grin. No longer bothering with a plate, she picks up the fork and takes a piece, if only to point it in his direction. "...Though, i do enjoy your cooking..."

Laurent Mercier snickered and meandered over to ease himself into a seat beside his wife.  "I've been told it's one of my better qualities.  Now I know why you've kept me around so long."  Another soft chuckle and he eased a hand around her hip, drawing her in against him as he watched the fork eagerly.  "And I enjoy your writing, and the color of your eyes, and general company."  He chuckled impishly.

The forkful is slowly lofted to his lips as she raises a brow, tucking herself in close to him. At his words, a gentle tilt of her head is given, hair tumbling down her shoulders. "The... colour of my eyes...?"

Laurent Mercier canted his head slightly, quirking a brow at the reaction.  "... Mmm.  I know you were born with purple eyes, but ever since I've known you, they've been this lovely, enchanting shade that never quite seems to stay the same color.  I could sit and gaze at them until I get lost...  Sometimes I do, but I'm never in a hurry to remember where I was."

Laurent Mercier smiles at you.

Bexy Amalaryssia smiles faintly. It is a small, bittersweet sort of thing, as she takes a forkful of the tart for herself. "...I look at them in my reflection, sometimes. When it is clear enough. They were purple, once.... Darker than Mist's. Like jewels. Like amethysts. But not now. Not since... My aether.... And much too bright to be sapphires. Tainted by aether, but... They look like little blizzards. Little windows into Coerthas." She slowly pulls her lips into a short frown, before dismissing it, looking to his own. "...Yours are... Soft. The colour is warm. Inviting. A gentle blanket on a hard sun. Understanding. They do not make my heart race, but... Slow. Into a kind of comfort i had almost forgotten... Until i met you."

Laurent Mercier smiled at that, offering a soft, gentle sigh of contentment.  "... I can only imagine.  What it must have been like, the thoughts you must have had being dragged out to the restaurant, despite everything else going on at the time, by this odd fellow.  I still think back to that, sometimes.  Always glad I asked, too.  I couldn't have asked for a better place to wind up."  He reached out to take another large, overripe berry from the dessert, and offered it out towards her lips, balanced precariously on his fingertips.

Bexy Amalaryssia leans in to sink her teeth into the offered fruit, with a short wiggle of her ears. Consideration is given as she eats, mulling the words she would speak when she was able. "...I remember it. Everything, from those suns. I... Mostly asked myself why. Why you'd bother. Back then, i didn't think i'd ever be able to feel... Anything again. It was like a void. A bottomless well, once so replete with emotion... Gone. I never understood, back then. Why someone like you, would choose someone like me."

I do now, of course. He told me; long before he proposed, and then to all who would listen when we wed.

People think us perhaps an odd couple. At least, those who don’t know us well. They think him too soft, too gentle for me. And they think me too vicious, too violent.

And perhaps... I have become a little softer, a little more gentle for his presence.

...But is that truly a bad thing?

Laurent Mercier considered that for a moment as he popped the remainder into his mouth and watched her with a curious expression.  He chewed slowly, swallowed, then started with "Well... Much like you, you outwardly caught my attention, otherwise.  The dress, the decorum.  And once we spoke just a little, I knew you weren't a robot.  And I guess I just always believed that we would eventually fix it, so to me it was never more than temporary anyway.  Certainly not enough of a reason to exclude you the option.  Even if nothing came of it, I was content to enjoy the opportunity to learn about a friend, and share as much of myself.  Perhaps it sounds almost blindly naive or optimistic but, somehow I knew that you'd... find yourself again, one day.  I don't know exactly why I felt that way, but it felt... almost like I was resigned to accept it if I entertained the idea of it staying that way."

Bexy Amalaryssia abandons the fork on the plate if only to brush a hand through his hair. "...Laurent. Your optimism has ever been one of my favourite things about you." Her hand slowly traces over his cheek, settling at his collar. "...I couldn't ever have known. Not that it would come back. But it did... In drips and drabbles at first. At least, until the flood..." Her eyes slowly trace to his hands, then. "...You were prepared to sacrifice more than that... Weren't you?"

Laurent Mercier watches wordlessly as her gaze drops along the length of his arm, his fingers almost imperceptibly tightening if not for the cords of taut sinew that faintly pushed its way through the leather of the gloves covering the marred skin beneath.  For just a split second, he felt the searing heat wrought deep into his flesh, the smell of scorched meat, the flash of crimson and ebony against the purity of the snow.   But then, he blinked and once more he was in the Willows.  He quietly nodded, pushing away the distant memory.   "Maybe I didn't know it quite then, my body was moving before my brain had caught up.  I never questioned my choice, though.  Knowing full well what I would be about to go through, I'd make the same choice again, if it bought you even a scant minute longer."

Bexy Amalaryssia: "...You would. I know you would." Slowly, Bexy reaches for one of her gloves. Between her forefinger and thumb, she pinches one of the fingertips, to pull away the fabric and reveal the skin beneath. Pale skin turns pallid just beyond her elbows, a vibrant and icy blue as it passes her wrists. Fingernails painted red lay untarnished beneath, her wedding ring nestled against a scar on her left hand. "...I'm so used to being the one who protects people. I'm the one who sees us all home after a contract. After combat. But you..." She reaches to take his hand with her own, once again. "...You didn't even hesitate for a second. For me..." She repeats, quietly. "...Me." Her gaze slowly levels with his own. "...I would do everything i could to keep you safe, Laurent. And more besides, to keep you close. There are so, so many good and kind people in this world, but..."

Bexy Amalaryssia: "...None of them are quite like you."

Laurent Mercier contentedly slipped his marred fingers between her own blue and red-tipped digits, squeezing them gently as he did so.  "... Of course, Bexy.  I have to protect you, because just the same... No one else is quite you.  You are irreplacable, and I would move the heavens and the star itself to bring you back to me.  And because I know this feeling, I know you would do the same, without asking and without hesitation.  I'd be with you every sun from now until our last, and damn anyone who tries to stop me."

Bexy Amalaryssia: "...I'd do anything to bring you back to me. Gods, Laurent... The things i would do..." Her hand squeezes his, slowly tracing her thumb over the ridges of his knuckles. "...But you knew that. When you married me." Her head dips only a little, but she doesn't divert her gaze. "...You have seen the things i would do. I... Am glad you love me still, despite it."

...The things i would do for those i love...

I don’t know what extent it is. But i have ventured into those depths some time before, and not found the bottom of it.

I hope that i need never test the limits of my dedication, but... I would, if i had to.

Laurent Mercier smiled and nodded. "I did, and I do.  I've done many the same things, many things that, viewed through a clear lens, might paint me a monster.  Yet, when presented with choice, be a monster, or watch the monster take you from me, then I'll smile and thank them for the compliment."

Bexy Amalaryssia: "Laurent---" Her words are clipped a she leans in, to close what remained of the gap between them. "...You're not a monster. You could never be a monster. Not you." She raises her head to meet her lips with his own, before settling her forehead to his. "...I have seen enough of them. Been one, once, myself... You're kind. You'd do it for the right reasons. To protect. Or for justice. Not...Not because you enjoy it, or you get a kick out of it, or some other such thing..."

Bexy Amalaryssia: "...You do it because you have to. Not because you want to. At least... Not most of the time."

Laurent Mercier presses his head gently against hers, smiling softly into the kiss and nodding.  "Yeah... I'll try to avoid it unncessarily, but if someone forces my hand, if I have to make the choice... I will, and I won't lose sleep over it.  I've lost my family once, I'll die before losing it again.  But, we also have the company to lean on, and I'm certainly thankful you've so many strong supports to lean on, as well."

Laurent Mercier: "Great friends, lifelong bonds, like Mist and Adelle... They'll always be there to help build you up."

Bexy Amalaryssia: "...Mist, Adelle, Sayuri... There are others, too. Many others..." She pulls herself closer if only to wind her arms around him, clutched close, and in so doing, brings her silence. Such a sound; of lack of it, clearly held some weight, as she gave a gentle squeeze. "I... I know some of them are afraid of me. And... I suppose they have right to be, considering. Even if my trust has been... Shaken somewhat." She pauses, looking to him. "...I know Dusk's betrayal was an isolated incident. I know not everyone sees me like he does. But it still... Hurts."

Laurent Mercier's expression hardened briefly at the mention of the incident and Dusk's name, but he quickly contained the reaction and stifled his anger.  He eased his arms around her and simply held Bexy against himself.  "I know.  I wish I had been there to protect you then, too.  But, for that one poor, scared man, think of all of the people who have absolutely none of you.  And not just those three, there's Zhav, and Mhira, and..."  He blinked, then quietly sighed and politely added, "... Mattisaux. "

Bexy Amalaryssia rests her head on his shoulder, quietly. "...Mist is a little afraid of me. I can see it. In every too-quick move i make. In everything i don't say. Adelle... I don't know. I don't think so. Not anymore, at least. Sayuri isn't." She glances to him, despite her angled position. "...Zhav's a little scared of me, but... I think she enjoys it. Mhira and the rest of the Karahli... I would be surprised if they weren't. To an extent." At the final name spoken, Bexy exhales with a quiet sigh.

...I used to revel in it. Perhaps i still do. Not from my friends, though. I... Do not want them to be afraid of me.

...They have no reason to be afraid of me, but... I understand why they would be.

Bexy Amalaryssia: "...Mattisaux should be. But he probably isn't. He..." She trails, a little remorseful, burying her face into the side of his shoulder. "...We argued, last we spoke. I... I haven't heard from him since."

Laurent Mercier listened quietly as the Seeker bared some of her deepest, most private concerns to him.  He wasn't looking to refute her, but he also wanted to help pull her out of her own quagmire.  "... If you say so.  I can't say I've seen it there, but I'm sure people tailor themselves around me, as well.  Zhav, let's be honest, is probably more excited than scared of the fact that you can be dangerous."  He offered a gentle snicker at the warmaiden's expense, but then hummed as he considered her last quip.  "Mmm...  I see.  Well, it's not like I need to explain to you that he's a ticking bomb with a hair trigger.  In the nicest way possible, he's quite hot headed.  I expect he'll calm down and we'll bump into him soon.   Rumor has it the man wept for you at one point.  Can't imagine he'd just storm off into the night without a word."

Bexy Amalaryssia: "...I killed for him, Laurent. I was... I was training in Coerthas. I saw people dragging a body deeper into the wildnerness, and curiosity got the better of me. And... It was him." The frown wrinkles her lips as she pulls her head up, glassy eyed to look to him. "...I killed for him. I... I was so terrified they were taking him away. After everything that happened in the last cycle... I couldn't just sit by and watch. I protected him from people, from flames, from a hail of arrows until he regained conciousness, and... And... After it had all died down... He tells me of an altercation with Adelle. He -hurt- her, Laurent! He..." Her cold brings a chill to the room, no matter how much she tries to stop it, as tears spill down her cheeks. "The one thing... The -one thing- i asked him not to do... And he... Did it anyway..."

Bexy Amalaryssia: "...I was angry at him. But most of all, i... Was hurt. I told him that he'd betrayed me, and he... I don't think i'm worth his tears. I don't think he cares enough for that. But he begged to set it right. Asked what he could do. But i... I had no answer for him. I still don't."

...What repairations could possibly be made for broken trust?

...Does he even know how grevious a wound he has given me?

...Would he even care if he did?

Laurent Mercier bit his lip as this information was conveyed, as he saw the panic and pain in her eyes, and he sought to comfort her however he could, but found all he could do was to continue to simply listen and exist there for her.   His hand came to her side to hold her, to steady her and calm her as he gently hushed her before she burst into tears.  "Woah, woah, hey, Bexy, sweetheart, it's okay, you don't have to immediately have an answer.  These things don't just happen overnight, but if he truly wants to set things right, I'm sure an opportunity will present itself.   He's known for making bad, impulsive decisions, but he usually knows when they're actually bad decisions.  You'll know when you've found your answer for him.  The only thing for him to do until then is to repent.  Perhaps the gravity of his actions will truly set in.  But you don't regret saving him, even despite everything, right?"

Bexy Amalaryssia shakes her head firmly. "N-no... Of course not. Not for a moment..." Her words are spoken honestly, though taper away into a long, quiet silence. She simply remains against him, exhaling a wavering breath until her cold settles into something a little more managable. "...We can only hope he does. And.... If he doesn't, i know where i stand." She sighs quietly through her nose, icy gaze flicking up to meet him again. "...It's a little late." She murmurs. Though she was clearly full of thoughts, she had no mind to speak them. "...I can show you the downstairs? It... Might be nice. To take a bath, before bed."

Laurent Mercier nodded at that, offering a hand to help her to her feet.  "Of course not.  The people around you treasure you for what you do for them, Bexy, isolated incident besides.  And a bath sounds like a lovely way to wind down before bed."  He gestured for her to lead him down.   "We can take a late morning tomorrow, I think."

Bexy Amalaryssia: "...Yeah." She smiles, even if it's a little bittersweet, gently rubbing her head against his shoulder. "...It sounds nice."

A bath, before bed. A bed i had no inclination to leave, once i’d gotten into it with him. Laurent’s presence is always one of comfort. Always.

He might not always be able to fix things. Or always be able to help.

But things always weigh just... A little less heavy, for his company.

#Muse: [Bexy] #Duet: [Sunshine And Snowfall] #Chapter: [Purpose] #FFXIV #IC #Screenshot #Writing #Textlog

[terrainofheartfelt]

godddddd as much as i love the outfits (and melissa fumero!) i still can’t get over how insane it was that they gave blair minions at columbia. high school hierarchy is one thing (obviously greatly exaggerated on the show, but with some basis at least) and i can even sort of conceptualize blair tricking some college freshman into following her around for a little while, however - with upperclassmen at a fucking ivy league? i mean, these girls are hot, they’re rich, and they’re in a social environment where there are no queen bees in any meaningful way, so why the fuck are they running blair’s errands????? i’m all for a certain suspension of disbelief but i have a realllyyyy hard time believing that at that age, blair wouldn’t just be told to take her binders and shove them lol

yaaaas melissa fumero is outstanding! I can't wait to see what she does next!

and YEAH. you're so right. when you think about it for longer than a minute, it gets more and more ridiculous. I mean, the show continued the schtick for easy laughs and easy plotting (*whispers* it's lazy writing), but damn, it would have been SO fun to - at either school - have Blair try to repeat the cycle and have girls be like "what the fuck. no I will not research powerful women for you, I have chem homework." and that opens up a whole world of humor, of blair trying to figure out how to operate sans minions (which of course she could, homegirl is diabolical enough on her own). and it would be funny, after that whole song and dance about columbia being "the right place" which, let the girl stay at nyu for those columbia girls to tell blair to knock it off. oof the possibilities of it make me so excited/mad that we didn't get that on the show!

like, imagine blair pulling an elle woods like "fine" and then becoming even more determined to kick their asses academically. she and melissa fumero could have had such a time.

but then being able to make friends? like, real friends. other than Serena and Nate who aren't afraid of her, so she grows into herself with a little more grace, like. *adele voice* we could have had it ALL

now I gotta go read all the college aus now to feed my soul.

#asks #anon #is this meta or hc? or neither? idk. #but you're right there would have been so many more interesting ways to take this rather than ~more minions~ #which - as has been pointed out before - involved poc characters waiting on blair. #as one of my friends would say (in humorous understatement): it's a tough look.

[larrysballetslippers]

Don’t read this in a rude voice or anything like this, yes, I am annoyed but more at the misinformation spread. It’s is okay to sometimes say that people have no idea about the industry, I skimmed through that post you have reblogged and the sheer amount of ignorance that I have read is astonishing. And the names listen? The Weeknd? His recent album flopped, peaked at number two and the streams are low. Lorde? Again, flopped era, peaked at number 5 and I don’t even think that the album has billion streams. Adele? Easy on me is successful, the album underperformed. Taylor Swift didn’t disappear from the public in 2016 because of overexposure or wanting to be likeable but because Kanye drama when she had murals announcing her death, the death of her reputation, and millions wishing her death. She has head big eras since 2012ish and every one of them had a new boyfriends and big press. Now she heavily relies on remixes and special editions, her song once dropped 38 spots from number one, and she has the record for the biggest dropped. How do people just mindlessly write shit, when all this data is available, but then it’s the same person who demanded that Harry share his queer trauma to sell nail polish, otherwise it’s not genuine.

You also shouldn't read this as a rude voice, just sharing my 11 am take on this. Look, I can't say everything what was said in that post was true, because I don't know, but it wasn't about WHY Taylor disappeared. Or about why Lorde, Adele etc disappeared off the charts. It was about the overexposure and exploitation of pop artists, like they are doing to Harry right now. Harry needs to get out of the mess he's in now, because they are killing him like this. That's all I'm going to say about that.

Also, please don't talk badly over my friend? I know that they're being hated by most of the fandom right now, but they're still my friend, and I even agreed on a lot of points. So also hate me if you're hating her? That's all, I'm not angry with you, but that's all I want to say.

#anon asks #I hope I won't be blocked by the entire fandom lmao but if that's the case so be it

[highnoteblog]

The Age for New Beginnings: 30 by Adele

By Alex Amorado

Adele’s 30, was everything her fans wanted and more. Much like her other albums, it is named after the age she wrote the songs. The age of 30 for Adele was especially significant and filled with profound of emotions as she journeys through life’s complexities following her divorce.  This album can be said as Adele’s best album yet, expressing her rawest and realest form. Narratives of the things she has gone through are found all throughout the album.

Themes of heartbreak, finding oneself, moving on, and love (romantically, for her son and for herself) are evident in the 12 diverse and brilliantly unique crafted songs. 

"Strangers by Nature," the hauntingly beautiful opening track of the album, sets the stage for an emotionally charged journey that lies ahead. With delicate organ chords, Adele's voice soars and echoes over the melancholic orchestral arrangement, creating a powerful yet vulnerable atmosphere. The depictive lyrics of a scene in the cemetery and ends with the line “Alright then, I’m ready” brings the audience in to Adele’s life in the that her marriage and love was something she had to bury for her own peace.

As the album unfolds, each song offers a unique perspective on love, heartbreak, and empowerment. "Easy on Me," the globally acclaimed piano-ballad that has won the hearts of people, as Adele's passionate voice brings to life the heart-wrenching lyrics about the consequences of staying in a love that erodes one's sense of self. It’s a reminder that even when loving other people, we also have to stay in love with ourselves– careful not to lose ourselves in loving others. As Adele journeys through her divorce, she asks her son to go easy on her as she tries to explain why their marriage did not work out. 

The album plays on different subgenres such as Jazz and R&B fusion heard in  "My Little Love"  that draws inspiration from a heartfelt conversation between Adele and her son. The velvety background vocals seamlessly enhance the narrative, a poignant tale shared by Adele about her relationship with her son. Vulnerable and honest, she lays bare her anxieties, fears, and vulnerabilities in this deeply personal piece.

Departing from her signature melancholic ballads, the album takes an upbeat turn with "Cry Your Heart Out" and "Oh My God." "Cry Your Heart Out" surprises with its vocal layering and brass instrumentation, infusing the song with a perky and soulful style that contrasts the introspective lyrics of two sides of the same coin, crying over loss but also happy crying for new beginnings. It’s a song of juxtaposition, where you can happily dance based on the tune and cry while listening to the lyrics. On the other hand, "Oh My God" embraces a playful production, utilizing claps, keys, organ, and bass to create an electro-pop feel that complements the exciting lyrics about the experience of being flirted with after a divorce.

With the divorce, Adele also wishes to find an everlasting love which is something she writes about in the song “Can I Get It” somehow asking if she could actually get that ever-after love she has been dreaming about. It’s a beautifully written song that showcases an upbeat acoustic guitar style accompanied by claps, whistling, drums, and subtle hints of trumpet, resulting in a lively and intricately layered song about the pursuit of everlasting love. 

Is it not like everyone else, when we are going through something it seems a little more bearable when we have wine on our side? The title “I Drink Wine” may give the same idea however it barely talks about the act of drinking but rather it becomes a lot more personal for Adele as it reflects both the repercussions she got from her father’s alcohol addiction as well the divorce she was going through. It’s a simple composition, with just Adele's soothing backup vocals blending with a gentle piano and drum accompaniment that reflects how she was “bounded by choices that somebody else”.

The interlude, "All Night Parking," holds a special place in the album as it features the renowned American jazz pianist Erroll Garner. With its dreamy sound, the interlude encapsulates the phrase "short and sweet," providing a moment of reflection and transition.

After that moment of reflection, we are reminded that self-empowerment and leaving something that is not worthy of you is something that worth celebrating, and “Women Like Me” does exactly that as Adele celebrates the importance of knowing when to walk away from a situation that no longer serves us. Adele reminds us that knowing when we deserve better is so important. But just as letting go can be difficult, sometimes holding on to something is also just as difficult, heard in her song “Hold On”. It’s a song written like a letter to herself about how “it's hard to hold on to something when I’m [she] stumbling in the dark for a hand”. It’s a song of double meaning where she’s losing herself trying to hold on to her failing marriage but at the same time trying to hold on to herself-no matter how little is left of her. The song in particular evokes a feeling of catharsis resonant to its listeners towards the end of the song as the orchestra intensifies to a crescendo. 

Closing the album with its final two songs, "To be Loved" begins with a piano intro that harks back to Adele's past relationship, a reminder of what she had to let go in order to find true love and be loved in return. It is a passionate and heartfelt anthem about sacrificing something that once meant everything. Lastly, "Love is a Game" ends the album with its silky cinematic jazz sound, exploring the notion that love is a game for fools. Adele acknowledges her hesitation to be love and vulnerable again, but ultimately admits that she would willingly embrace love's unpredictable journey.

This whole album is a masterpiece of real emotions transcending beyond the typical heartbreak albums as it touches on real-life complexities, making Adele more human and reachable by her audience. It’s a 5-star album and might I say her best album yet. There is no miss in this album with all very well written and proves and reassures the fact that 30 could indeed be the start of a new chapter with new beginnings. The album is incredible beyond belief, hence being nominated for two Grammy Awards, including Album of the Year, and it winning the Brit Award for British Album of the Year at the Brit Awards 2022.

#album review #alex