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#and yet it carried on because that's what it's about
afterglowsainz · 2 days
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i'mgonnagetyouback | max verstappen
summary: after you and max broke up you released an album about it and when you go on tour, you didn't expected max to be there front row after being dragged by his new girlfriend's daughter
warnings: none
word count: 877
a/n: this is kinda told in max's pov (?, also heavily inspired on taylor's eras tour and i slightly changed the lyrics of the song to relate it a bit more to max
the tortured athletes department series
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the lights were out in the stadium but there was barely any darkness. the lights of flashes from phones and twinkling colored light bracelets illuminated the allegiance stadium in las vegas, every person there waiting for the one and only y/n y/l/n.
if you would’ve told max months ago that he was gonna be at her ex-girlfriend’s sold out concert the same weekend he was racing in vegas, he would’ve laughed in your face. but here he was, waiting with the other 69,000 people for her to show up on stage and sing all her hit songs, including the ones that she wrote about him after their breakup.
he had to remind himself that the only reason he was doing this was because of his new girlfriend's daughter, who begged them for weeks to take her to y/n’s concert or she would simply die. she was y/n’s biggest fan because, of course, karma had to do that to max. so there he was, in the vip section of the stadium without y/n’s knowledge, next to his new girlfriend and her daughter.
the lights on the bracelets turned off and the stadium went a bit darker than before, announcing the start of the show. when a huge clock on the stage came up and it reached the number zero, y/n came out singing the first song of the concert and the crowd went wild. max was immediately mesmerized by her. she hadn’t changed much since they broke up, that much he noticed, and she was as beautiful as ever.
he had to control himself not to sing along to her songs to not give his girlfriend a bad impression, even though her daughter was singing all her songs by heart. he just nodded and move along with the rhythm, avoiding the gaze of his girlfriend who was very well aware of her boyfriends history with the singer on stage.
y/n was singing her most famous songs and a few that were more lowkey, and when they reached the acoustic set of the concert, she was carrying a wide smile while playing a few keys on the piano. max smiled at the sight of her.
“hello, vegas!” she shouted at the microphone, making the whole stadium scream. “welcome to the acoustic set.” she smiled. “i’ve been meaning to sing different surprise songs every night, some that i haven’t played in a while, some others brand new. this one particularly is from my new album, i hope you enjoy it.”
max stopped breathing for a second. it was very well known with the public that y/n’s new album was about their breakup and she hadn’t sung any of those songs until tonight. he didn’t know what to do with himself or how to behave, so he simply crossed his arms and stood a bit further into the vip section. in the location he was he had a perfect view of her, but she hadn’t seen him all night.
soon enough y/n start singing one of the songs from the new album that max new for a fact was about him. he hadn’t listen to the whole album because he just didn’t want to relieve the breakup. in his defense he did try to give it a listen, but it was just to overwhelming for him so he had to stop listening mid-album, but this one he knew.
Lilac short skirt / The one that fits me like skin
max submerged himself in the lyrics and y/n’s incredibly familiar voice. only now she wasn’t singing just for him, but for thousands of people.
Whether I'm gonna be your wife or / Gonna smash up your car, I / Haven't decided yet / But I'm gonna get you back
a rebel smile appeared on his face, incapable of hiding how much she meant to him, how much he had missed her. seeing her there, singing her heart out on stage for a crowd of people who were crazy about her, god, how could he lost her?
I can feel it comin', hummin' in the way you move / Push the reset button, we're becoming something new / Say you got somebody, I'll say, "I got someone too" / Even if it's handcuffed, I'm leaving here with you
the smile on her face while singing the song she wrote made his smile even greater. he didn’t know the song fully like his girlfriend’s daughter, but he knew; he lived it, just as much as she did. in that moment in time, he felt connected to her in a level that no one in the stadium was.
I hear the whispers in your eyes / I'll make you wanna think twice / You'll find that you were never not mine / I'm gonna get you back
when the song finished, the multitude exploited in praise and y/n’s smile grew on her face. max completely forgot about everyone else and joined the crowd, screaming for her and applauding. y/n stood up from the piano and did a small bow before leaving the stage for her next set of songs.
it was as clear as day for max and it struck him like lightning. he was gonna get her back.
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luveline · 12 hours
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omg jade i heard you asking for hotch reqs and i RAN to your inbox
what about hotch taking care of r after they have a lil baby?? i think if i saw that man hold a new baby id die!!!! he could hole their whole head in the palm of his hand 😭😭😭
Every time you move, your hips and more intimate regions hurt like a hot poker. You probably won’t cry, but you require some tylenol and some sympathy to carry on. “Hotch?” you ask. 
Silence. You tip your head back over the armrest to find him. Even upside down, he looks handsome, sitting in the two seater with your little bundle of agony in his arms. Or, arm. The baby rests neatly in the curve of his forearm, his free hand dedicated to the baby’s small back. 
“Hotch?” 
“Who is she talking to?” Hotch asks your baby gently. You know what he’s doing immediately. 
“You get so hung up on the Hotch thing, if you didn’t want to be called Hotch, you shouldn’t have introduced yourself as Hotch.”  
You’ve been calling him Hotch for years, you aren’t going to suddenly kick the habit now. 
“She was my subordinate,” Hotch tells the baby. “She couldn’t have special treatment, even if she is the prettiest subordinate I ever had. It wouldn’t have been fair.” 
“I wouldn’t mind some more tylenol.” 
He raises his gaze. You twist into a painful but better suited position to watch him move the baby closer to his collar, his hand covering the entirety of the baby’s small head. Hotch said Jack was a little baby too, but you’d been terrified regardless, and no matter the size, it was too big for you to come out of the ordeal unscathed. Tylenol isn’t so much wanted as required. 
“I’ll get it for you,” he promises. 
“Thank you, Aaron.” 
“Oh, you’re welcome, honey.” 
He stands and shifts your tiny baby further into his chest, little snores pressed to his collar. “You okay to take him? I’ll make you some lunch at the same time.”
“I can’t eat.” 
“Just chips and a sandwich, honey. You can manage that.”  
You open your arms, letting Hotch lower your baby down into your arms and the surrounding nest of blankets. “You need to go see where Jack is,” you say. 
“I know,” Hotch says, kissing your cheek quickly. “I’m gonna make his lunch too. I’ll be right back.” 
You cuddle your baby to your chest and lean back. Your baby Hotchner is, as previously stated, so tiny, but he’s a nice weight against you, and he sleeps like a champ. You thought easy babies were a myth until now. So far he’s done nothing but sleep and stare at you whenever you talk. You think it’s love, or the surprise of seeing the voices that talked to him nonstop while he was in your belly now out in the open. He does the same to Hotch whenever he’s awake. 
You haven’t named him yet. You asked Jack for help, but he’d recommended you name your new baby Mister Awesome, so you’re at a loss for now. It doesn’t matter, though. He’ll have a name eventually. Until then, he’s the baby. And he’s very well loved. 
You wish he hadn’t hurt so badly to bring into the world, is all. 
Somewhere deeper in the house, Jack tumbles down the stairs, to Hotch's audible horror. “Are you alright? What are you doing, buddy?” 
“I’m being quick!” 
“Please be careful!” There’s the sound of a kiss. “You sure you’re okay? Yeah? Gonna go and keep Y/N company?” 
“Yeah, dad.” 
“Okay, thank you. I’m gonna make your lunch now, any requests?” 
“Peanut butter. And chips. And pretzels. And orange slices? And–”
“How about I bring you lots of everything, bud?” 
“Yes. Please. Hug?” 
They must hug, though you can’t see or hear it, as Jack walks into the living room with wildly tousled hair and a smile. He climbs over the back of the couch even though he shouldn’t, dropping onto your feet, a tangle of arms and legs. “Hi, Y/N.” 
“Hi baby. You hungry?” 
“Dad’s gonna make me a sandwich.” 
You reach over to collect his hand in yours, squeezing his fingers gently. You’d thought for sure that having a baby in the house would upset him, if only because his usual routine was disrupted —he’d had to make room for you first, and now suddenly there’s a new baby taking all the attention? it’s not what only kids usually want— but Jack’s an easy kid too. He squeezes your hand back, shimmying up the couch to lean on your leg. It aches, every touch to your lower half a reminder of the pain further inward, but he’s not rough. He climbs further onto your leg and rests his cheek on your shoulder. 
“Is this a cuddle?” you murmur. 
“Pretty please.” 
“No please required.” You frown to yourself, trying to juggle the baby into the opposite arm so you can wrap the one closest to Jack around his shoulders. You manage it poorly. “Dad makes this look so easy.” 
“He has longer arms,” Jack says with a shrug. His nose jabs the skin just above your chest. “Don’t worry about it.” 
“I won’t. Thank you, babe.” 
Jack touches the baby’s back. “He’s sleeping?” 
“Yeah. Must be weird getting to sleep all the time and then suddenly being born. At least he’s not crying.” 
You and Jack lay with each other for a while, watching the baby snore as you whisper about what Hotch is making for lunch. You wish he’d brought you the tylenol before he started, but he’s got a lot going on. You’re glad he’s the one making lunch (though you can’t be expected to right now, considering). The idea of having to stand there and butter a sub roll sounds like a low level of torture. 
“Don’t let me fall asleep holding the baby,” you tell Jack, your eyes drifting closed as Jack snuggles closer to your face.
“I can go get dad.” 
“I’m here,” Hotch says swiftly. You drag your face to the side to see him in the doorway, two dinner trays balanced with ease in his hands despite their obvious weight and full glasses on either side. “Don’t fall asleep, I’m coming. Sorry about the wait.” 
Hotch puts your trays on the coffee table and scoops the baby from your chest, leaving behind an awfully warm patch of skin. 
“Tylenols on the tray,” he says, smiling at you lovingly. “You okay?” 
“Fine. Jack’s gonna feed me.” 
To his credit, your lovely stepson offers to really feed you, but you’re not so tired now there’s food in front of you. Your stomach groans in want. 
Hotch stands looking down at you, baby somehow even smaller looking in his arms. “Need anything else?” 
You hold half of your sandwich up to him. “Eat that.” 
“I’m fine. My hands are full.” 
“I’m not asking, Aaron. Take it.” You force the sandwich on him. “We both know you only need one hand.” 
He’s cautious not to rain crumbs down on the baby. You make no such fuss, bread and lettuce falling down into your lap as you eat. Jack can’t stop giggling, “You’re not s’posed to eat like that!”
“Sorry!” you say, “I’m just so hungry!” 
“It’s okay,” he says. “Dad will vacuum you.” 
Hotch’s mouth is full to bursting, but his nod is vehement. He swallows hard. “I’ll mop you, too.”  
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starqueensthings · 3 days
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We need to talk about Echo (and by talk I mean screm). S3 E13 + 14 Spoilers!
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FRIENDS, I'M GOING TO EXPLODE. I need to talk about Echo for a minute. We need to talk about Echo for a minute,  because he has spent the last two episodes in the absolute thralls of complete and total danger, and I personally don't feel like there's been enough of a celebratory uproar for me to be satisfied with the level of appreciation and love that man deserves. (Remember when Hunter ran face first into a colossal exhaust pipe and we all collectively lost our minds because it was so impressive and so sexy? Remember when Tech drove a speeder really fast through a tunnel and we all fainted? I'M A TECH GIRLY. IT WAS ME! I FAINTED!!) but, Y'ALL, Echo deserves that right now!! And for all eternity!!! Because he is wholly submurged in the harrowing potential of torture and execution, and he didn't even bat an eye to put himself there. My awe of him is all-consuming, so please forgive me if this rant reads as nothing but incoherent screaming. 
Echo haters (first of all, we can't be friends....) come on this journey with me! Let's back pedal to the beginning of the last episode (13). He stole an imperial shuttle. Let me repeat, he stole an imperial shuttle. And not just an attack shuttle. Not just a lil one-pilot transport. Bro somehow stole a Rho-class medical transport, which is very large, obscenely conspicuous, and very easily tracked. And, to use his own words, it was "the best he could do on short notice." The man stole a shuttle on short notice. ON SHORT NOTICE? HELLO, HOW DID HE DO THAT. WHY AIN'T WE LOSING OUR COOL ABOUT IT. 
Next stop on this I-love-Echo journey through my mind: not only did he provide his brothers transportation in the complete void of their own (RIP havoc bb), but he also came equipped with intel and clearance codes, and, as Rampart stated, those things change DAILY. Echo somehow procured top secret imperial clearance codes, and a fkn SHIP, within hours of the Batch requesting his help. Not to mention, the ship had yet to be reported missing (which means it was only-freshly commandeered), and the clearance codes worked. Of course they did. Echo never fails. Never doubt Echo. "Echo's on it."  
Choochoo, next stop! Once they arrived on that station orbiting Coruscant, and made their way to the control room (lookin sexy as heck in his armour-au-noir), he broke imperial encryption, hacked into the Imperial database, almost instantly found them the location of a ship departing for the prison that holds their daughter Tantiss, AND THEN DIDN'T EVEN HESITATE TO CLIMB ABOARD AND STOW AWAY.  
He didn't even remotely have a plan, or have time to make a plan. He didn't know who or what else would be on board that mysterious vessel. He didn't know where it was going other than the name of the fkn mountain (which has proven to be nothing but unhelpful thus far). He just ARC-troopered his way through that crowded hangar, dodging aggressive astromech's and inconsiderate loader droids, shirking from the perspective eyes of highly trained commandos, and snuck his way onto a heavily guarded, extremely unknown science vessel. Then, of course, he wasted no time, hacking into the ships control system (may I gently remind- there were at least three pilots and an officer prepping the ship for jump and closely watching all aspects of its controls), disabling the proximity sensors without being detected, and then seamlessly covered the troopers absence by pretending to be him (which we all know is what should have happened on Serenno but... hindsight is 20/20.)  
So... SO.... now we're at Episode 14. Here we at fkn terrified station because HULLO ECHO IS ALONE ON A SCIENCE DIVISION TRANSPORT; we have literally seen them carry around Zilo beasts in that shit. What the heck else could be on there that they don't know about? Literally anything. Because THEY KNEW NOTHING before attaching themselves to it. Echo knew NOTHING before sneaking onto that thing and creepin' around. Thank heck he didnt come across a fkn fresh wave of slither vines ok?  
NEXT, Echo shoots (not stuns- lol) a sassy fkn droid (they had it coming, not sorry), then another trooper. AND THEN discovered his only option for departing the ship once it enters atmosphere is going completely undercover, because (in true "we improvise everything" CF99 fashion that gives me heart burn just thinking about it), they had zero fkn plan to get off the ship. I will repeat: completely undercover. On Tantiss. COMPLETELY UNDERCOVER ON TANTISS. NO COMMS, NO BACK UP, NO RECON, NO PLAN, BARELY ANY GEAR, and I would just like to stress... no neuro brace. He left his neurobrace on that ship. Left it. LEFT IT AND TOOK A HAND INSTEAD. PLEASE FKN SEDATE ME.  
We can't leave this station yet... This I-love-Echo train needs to linger at this point for a sec because I think it's lost on some people how wild this is. Echo without his neurobrace is huge. It's a bigger deal than Echo without his armour. Armour is, in the grand scheme of things, inconsequential (one can find more- see Howzer). Echo's neurobrace is not armour, it's a computer and it's so so so crucial to how his mind processes information and events. Don't forget, the Technounion HIJACKED HIS BRAIN. They took every memory from him and manipulated it for their gain. Pruned it, tweaked it, blanched it, poached it, turned it into scrambled eggs, and then fkn ate it up and used it to defeat their enemies (Echo's family- I'm sobbing). They implanted him with an unfathomable amount of information; they changed the way the neurons in his brain fire in relation to stimuli. That neurobrace is so so critical for him. Now, we know he can operate well enough without it, we saw it in the last episode of the TBB arc in season 7 of Clone Wars, but... please.... to what extent? We don't know what an extended time without that neurobrace looks like for him... especially when all other aspects compliing his surroundings foreign, unknown, and dangerous, and that scares me.
AND NOW HE'S ABOUT TO RUN AMOK IN TANTISS with Emerie who, (I'm sorry) is wishy-washy as heck (who are you loyal to!!!!! What is your history!!! Are you trustworthy and what are you looking to gain!!!), trying to adopt a collection of Jedi children whove spent maker-knows how long playing space tetris, WHILST ALSO ATTEMPTING TO LOCATE AND ESCAPE WITH HIS BROTHERS UNDER THE EYE OF THE GALAXY'S SECOND MOST DANGEROUS MAN. 
So yes, short of d-d-d-di... can't say it... short of THE WORST CASE, Echo has made the ultimate sacrifice to save not only Omega who is literally the only person we've seen able to make him truly laugh, but all the clone brothers that he's been desperately trying to locate and rescue. His bravery and determination are literally unrivalled, and he did it while feasting on nothing but humble pie because that man wouldn't know arrogance if it danced naked under his perfect nose.  
Okay so welcome, we've finally pulled into I-Love-Echo station. Before departing the ride, please stand and do a hip hip hurray for the miracle that is Echo, including but not limited to, everything he's done, is doing, and is willing to do for other people. 
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ghostofhyuck · 3 days
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NCT Dream when you fainted after having an argument with them.
AN: Fainted, like literally falling on the floor blackout, also in this scenario, you fainted literally minutes after the argument. it's pink because it's more of a comfort scenario than hurt.
Mark Lee
The moment you fainted, Mark wouldn't hesitate to grab you and carry you to your room. He looks at you with worry and will be guilty about it. It's the reason why you two had an argument, you're not taking care of yourself and Mark was worried about you!! See this is the result of your carelessness, he thinks but what's important first is you. So the moment you regain consciousness, he'll tend you and ask you if you're okay. You don't know what to say but you were still thankful that he took care of you, but just be prepared to be nagged by him.
Huang Renjun
Renjun would also carry you to your room and prompt you to your bed. He'll watch over you, check if you have a fever, or if your breathing is normal. He was WORRIED because he thinks that it was his fault that you fainted after a heated argument. It took you the whole day to regain consciousness and as soon as you're awake, Renjun will ask you if you're okay or if you need anything. You don't know what to say but it felt like a silent truce between the two of you, discarding the fact that you two had an argument earlier. 
Lee Jeno
Jeno will be EYES WIDE, like he'll be frozen for a second when he sees you slumped on the floor. He'll panic that he'll try to wake you RIGHT THERE. He will shake you aggressively and while you attempt to open your eyes but it's all black and blurry, you can still hear Jeno's voice. You can hear him saying sorry to you for having an argument with you and promises you that he won't do it again. You were just too numb to answer him, so when you were okay a few hours later, you told Jeno (who carried you to your bed and watched over you the whole day) that you're fine and you were sorry too. 
Lee Donghyuck
Haechan would panic when he saw you dropped on the floor, he'll try to wake you up but when he sees your pale lips, he'll carry you to your bed and just watch over you until you wake up. As soon as you wake up, you can see the tray of food and water on your side table. "You haven't eaten yet didn't you?" he asked, and you know that that's the reason you two fought. He hands you the food but starts nagging you about it, you didn't answer anymore because you were just too tired. But immediately, Haechan apologizes to you and tells you that he's just worried about you. 
Na Jaemin
Jaemin will immediately bring you to your bed and just watch over you. While he was watching over you, he'll think about your argument with him earlier and a part from him feels guilty that you two fought again. He'll be the type to hold you hands while you're still unconscious, would look at the clock numerous times to see how many hours had passed. As soon as you woke up, his face lights up, and will try to ask you if you need anything. You only opt for a glass of water, and he tries his best to make it up to you. The two of you didn't brought up the argument earlier. 
Zhong Chenle
When Chenle hears the loud thud, and sees you on the floor. He'll carries you immediately to your bed. He'll try to look up what to do with you, and as he checks if you're breathing and your heartbeat can be felt, he leaves you for a moment to give you some space. A few hours later, you woke up and sees Chenle enters the room the same time. You two had a staring contest then he proceeds to nag you! He tells you how shocked he was and that you shouldn't scare him like that. Then he'll hug you and will apologize for arguing with you earlier.
Park Jisung
It's obvious that he will panic. He doesn't know what to do and tried to wake you up by calling your name. He thinks that he needs to bring you to the hospital but luckily he called help from Dreamies. They told him to move you to your bed and let you rest for a while. He did the following but he didn't leave the room. He'll watch over you, try to wake you up every chance he can have, and poor baby will be very guilty because he started the argument. So when you woke up, he'll apologize to you and will start rambling at how he will be a better boyfriend to you. 
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"are you awake yet?" "no." "oh, okay sorry." + peter parker + and it's like the first night they've spent together
Pretty Girl
✮ tasm!peter parker x fem!reader
✮ word count: 0.6k
✮ summary: a soft morning with peter.
✮ warnings: allusion to smut, mention of sexy times the night before, reader has hair that can be tucked behind her ear, mentions of morning breath, a soft kiss and a steamy kiss.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
main m.list ⋆ peter parker m.list
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not my gif. credits to the owner :)
The comfort of the blankets covering your bare body makes you want to sink deeper into the mattress, but the sudden confusion of your surroundings pulls you out of your groggy state. You come to your senses as you feel for the sheets around you, the unfamiliar texture makes you realize the arm thrown over your waist. 
For a split second, you panic, until you force yourself to calm down. You sigh as you remember that you spent the night with Peter, and you nuzzle your body closer to his, a soft smile appearing on your lips. 
Peter must have felt your sudden need to be closer, because he pulls you closer to his chest, his skin warm from sleep. A flush of warmth runs over your cheeks. Some of it is from pure joy, but most of it is from giddy at the thought of the night before. 
The sun is starting to peek through the blinds of Peter’s window causing you to squint, effectively pulling you out of the sluggishness of sleep. Now that you’re awake, your body can’t stay still. The urge to turn around and press small kisses to Peter’s face was strong, and it took everything in you to stay facing away from him. 
You could only move for so long before Peter started to stir, his heightened senses picking up on your restlessness. An incoherent groan slips past his lips, causing you to giggle. You finally turn your body to face him, your hand reaches up to push a mess of his hair away from his eyes. Your hand lowers to rest on the side of his face, your thumb slowly rubs back and forth. Your voice is still warming up as you ask, “Are you awake yet?” 
Peter’s eyes are still closed, but a small laugh leaves him. His smile falls rapidly as he tries to conceal it. Now with his face forcing a frown, he responds, “No.” 
If your boyfriend wants to play games, you could too. You pull your hand away from his face, and quickly turn back around and move away from his grasp. He opens his eyes at your sudden movement, and he’s met with a view of your bare back. “Oh, okay sorry,” you mumble to him as you make yourself comfortable on the other side of the bed, a grin appearing on your face. 
You can hear a chuckle coming from him behind you before you feel an arm around your waist, turning you around and pulling you onto his chest. Pieces of your hair fall around your face as you laugh. “Hey pretty girl,” Peter whispers as he tucks some strands of hair behind your ear then moves to hold the side of your face. 
Your heart melts at his greeting. He brings your face down to his to kiss your lips softly. You savor the feeling, but quickly pull away, “I have morning breath, Peter!” 
His eyes are still on your lips, his gaze carries an unmistakable look of longing. “I don’t care,” he mumbles as he pulls you back down again. 
This time, you don’t pull away. Your lips are beautifully entangled with his. The kiss is deep and fills you with an overwhelming sense of love. Peter’s fingers begin to weave through your hair, giving it a slight tug as he moans into your mouth. You don’t pull away until you absolutely have to, the lack of air causing your head to swirl. “I thought you weren’t awake,” you tease. 
“No, no,” he starts, “I’m definitely awake. I don’t know what you’re talking about?” You laugh at his response before looking over his features. You take a mental picture of the Peter you’re looking at now. The morning sun looked good on him.
✮ author's note: hi all!! first of all, thank you for the support during my unplanned hiatus. your kind words have meant so much to me. once again, im slowly putting out the rest of the recs from the 400 follower bash, so stay tuned for those!! and im literally so close to 500 already...like what?? so keep an eye out for a little celebration for that too!! ok, ily bye!!!
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gunnerfc · 3 days
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First Time | Hayley Raso x Matildas!Reader (18+) [Wednesday]
Summary: You and Hayley finally take the next step in your relationship when you are roomed together during a Matildas’ camp [r plays in the NWSL]
Warnings: bottom hayley, top reader, oral (hayley receiving), she’s a tease lol
WC: 3.2k
AN: Ignore that I've used the same title for a different fic with the same plot, I could not for the life of me come up with something different 💀
Night After Night masterlist 
You huffed as you opened the hotel door that led to the room you’d be staying in for the next few days in Sydney, dropping to the bed the moment you sat your things by the unclaimed bed. Ever since you got called up to the Matildas, the traveling had yet to get easier given you had to fly in from America. You got in later than most of your teammates minus those who also played in the NWSL so you had the room to yourself at the moment, though you could tell whoever your roommate was was already in camp.
You didn’t look too hard at the belongings on the other side of the room, though if you had you would have realized you were rooming with your girlfriend. You and Hayley had been dating since the start of the World Cup last year and with the long distance between Spain and America, Tillies camp offered you a short time together. 
Because of the long distance, you two have yet to take the next step in your relationship. You two had made small comments about it happening at the next camp if you were roomed together but it seemed the staff were out to get you as you were never paired together. But now, everything was falling into place for you and your girlfriend to finally have sex. 
You sat up on the bed and sighed as you stretched your arms, the long flight was starting to catch up to you. You took some time to make yourself a little more comfortable in the room and put some clothes away before heading to the bathroom to get ready for bed. You opted out of the small team bonding session since you got in so late and needed to sleep enough for training the next morning. 
Just as you exited the bathroom, the hotel door opened, making you jump slightly at the unexpectedness. You recognized Hayley immediately despite her having her back facing you as she carried on the conversation she was having with Ellie and Teagan. An idea popped into your head when she remained in the doorway and had yet to notice you were so close.
You caught Ellie’s eye and quickly raised a finger to your lips to ‘shh’ her which earned you a small smirk from the blonde. You stuck your hands out to grab her waist, yelling slightly as your hands touched her. A yell left her lips as she quickly turned, catching you with a bright smile on your face.
“What was that for,” the winger groaned, earning loud laughter from your teammates in the hallway. “Dickhead,” she mumbled as she hit your arm before turning to tell Ellie and Teagan goodnight. 
You laughed as she passed you but followed her toward the beds. Before you could process it, Hayley’s arms were around your neck as she pulled you into a tight hug. You wrapped your arms around her body, holding her close to you as you rested your forehead on her shoulder. You lifted your head slightly until your eyes were locked with her before they dropped slightly to land on her lips.
Hayley moved her hands to rest on the sides of your neck before pulling you in for a long kiss. You hated playing in different leagues in two different counties, being long-distance sucked but you two made it work. You cherished the time you got to spend together during camps and wouldn't take it for granted. 
Your lips moved against hers slowly as you pulled her as close as you could to your body. Your lips fought each other before Hayley pulled back when air became an issue. You leaned forward in an attempt to chase her, wide eyes and your chest heaving slightly as you did so. 
“I didn’t know you were here already,” she mumbled as she moved a hand to rest on your chest, her eyes still lingering on your lips.
“I got in not that long ago and came straight here to get ready for bed,” you explained, your thumbs rubbing circles against her clothes where they rested around her waist. 
“Give me a minute and I’ll join you,” she cooed as her hands ran down your arms to rest on your wrists. You reluctantly let go and moved to let her get her things to change. You jokingly rolled your eyes and laughed softly when she made her way to the bathroom to change, knowing you’d seen her change countless times before and after games. 
You returned to the bed you first sat on, this time moving to get under the cover as you waited for Hayley. You quickly set an alarm for the next morning before placing your phone on the charge on the nightstand between both beds. The forward joined you a few moments later, quickly tossing her clothes into her suitcase before joining you in bed.
You opened your arm to let her rest her head on your chest, your arm wrapping around her once she was comfortable. Your eyes fought to stay open, knowing you didn’t get much time to spend with your girlfriend. “We have all camp, y/n/n,” Hayley whispered softly as if she could read your thoughts. 
You placed a quick kiss on the top of her head before your eyes closed, muttering a small ‘I love you’ before sleep took over. Hayley whispered it back even though she knew you were out and she wasn’t far behind you.
You moaned softly when your alarm blared in the morning, light peeking in from the curtains, helping to wake you up. Sometime in the middle of the night, the two of you moved around and ended up in a spooning position, your arm resting softly on Hayley's waist. You were the first to wake up, turning slightly to snooze your alarm before it could wake the forward. 
You turned back around and moved her hair slightly away from her neck and the side of her face. You leaned forward before placing soft kisses along her cheek before dropping a few to her jaw on your way to her neck. “Baby,” you murmured against her neck in an effort to wake her up.
Hayley whined softly as she woke up, but that didn’t stop your light kisses. Her soft whine turned into a low moan when you sucked a bit harder on her neck, a small hickey to form in its place later. She rolled onto her back, forcing you to pull away from her neck before she was moving to straddle your hips.
The forward pulled you by the front of your shirt into a sitting position as her lips locked with yours. This kiss was different than any other make-out you two had, it felt needier as her hands tilted your head slightly to make the angle better for her. Hayley pulled back slightly, lifting her shirt in the process and tossing it to the unoccupied bed, leaving her top half completely bare.
Her lips were back on yours before you realized and you moved your hands to her bare waist, earning a small gasp from her at the feeling of your cool hands on her body. You two were too in your own world, lips fighting for dominance though neither of you really winning. Her hips rolled softly against you as you held her tightly. 
You were rudely interrupted when your alarm went off again after the short snooze, both of you pulled back in surprise at the loud noise. You fumbled with your phone as you turned the alarm off completely this time before dropping it back to the nightstand. You refocused your attention on your girlfriend as you forced your eyes away from her bare chest. You licked your lips as you locked eyes with Hayley, both of you slightly out of breath from the kiss.
She smirked slightly as she watched you catch yourself looking down, doing your best to avoid looking any lower. “We should probably get ready, baby,” she teased, earning a fast nod from you which made her smirk grow. She was going to have so much teasing you today.
She moved off of you and reached for her shirt that she tossed, taking her time to put it back on. Just as she turned to face you, you quickly jerked your head to the front, your face heating up knowing you’d been caught. Hayley kept her reaction to herself but leaned in to give you a quick kiss before grabbing her training kit and heading to the bathroom.
When you hear the door close, you fall back to the pillow with a quiet groan. You weren’t sure how you would function being in the same room with her for the entire camp. After a quick breather, you got up to change as well, taking your time to calm yourself down. Just as you finish slipping your shoes on, Hayley exits the bathroom and joins you at the edge of the bed to put her shoes on as well.
You lean back on your hands as you watch her, your eyes subconsciously dropping to shamelessly scan her body. Hayley turned her head in your direction, raising an eyebrow as she sat up fully. “Y’know, if you take a picture, it’ll last longer,” she teased as she stood up, offering her hand to pull you from the bed.
You laugh softly at her comment but opt to give her a quick kiss as a response. You both moved to grab your bags and phones before heading out into the hallway and down the hall toward the conference room being used by the team for breakfast. You two walked hand-in-hand, swinging your interlocked hands between with bright smiles on your face. As you enter the conference room, teasing comments fly your way from your teammates earning an eye roll from Hayley and a middle finger from you.
Breakfast was uneventful aside from Kyra pranking Steph and Caitlin, both of who are used to the young midfielder’s jokes. The bus ride was filled with laughter from most of the team as Alanna made everyone use a TikTok filter to pass the time. You kept to yourself as you laced your boots in the locker room, more focused on doing your best to prove you should start in the upcoming match against England. 
You looked up as you finished tying your boots, catching Hayley’s eye who was sitting right across from you. The forward winked at you before she stood up, you quickly hid your face from her so she wouldn’t see your reaction but she didn’t need to see your face to know she affected you. The team quickly finished getting ready and slowly started filtering out of the locker room and you made an effort to be one of the first ones out to avoid any more teasing from your girlfriend. 
Once everyone was on the pitch, the training staff handed out warm-up instructions and sent everyone on a jog around the pitch to get everyone's legs moving. You did your best to stay away from Hayley but she seemed to be everywhere you were. After warm-ups, everyone was divided into small groups, and at first, you were thankful you weren't in the same group as Hayley. That is until one of the trainers said you’d be playing a small scrimmage and your group would be against Hayley’s first. 
You knew as a defender you had to do everything you could to keep her from scoring and she was going to do anything she could to get past you. For the most part, your team kept possession and you didn’t have to deal with Hayley but that was until her side won possession and she had taken off down your side. You kept up with her the whole time but when she smirked and sent another wink your way, you misread her step and she managed to get around you. You sighed thankfully when Teagan saved her shot but that didn’t make you feel any better.
“Better luck next time, yeah,” the forward teased when she walked past you, despite not scoring she was still proud of herself for distracting you.
You sent her a glare that had no malice behind it and moved to the sidelines as the next two groups took the pitch. You took a seat to catch your breath and a water bottle came into your vision, your girlfriend standing above you. “Thanks,” you huffed as you took the bottle and turned the bottle to pour water into your mouth.
Hayley chuckled to herself as she took a seat next to you, practically invading your personal space. Her hand moved to rest on your thigh and you had to fight from flexing the muscle under her touch. She was making it her mission to tease you as much as she could during training and she was succeeding. You needed training to go by faster than it was but to your dismay, it seemed to drag on for eternity.
When Tony finally called it a day hours later, you were thankful. You could only handle so much teasing from Hayley mixed with the demanding training. You spent little time changing your shoes and were back on the bus before anyone could realize you had left the locker room. You sat in your seat by the window with your head tilted back against the seat as you took deep breaths. Mainly from how much running you just did but also because of how turned on you were by your girlfriend. 
Your teammates started filling the bus and you could see Hayley’s teasing smirk as she walked down the aisle. You didn’t meet her eye when she dropped to the seat next to you despite her waiting for you to look at her. She laughed to herself when you didn’t budge and gave your thigh a light squeeze before joining in a conversation with Steph and Mary. 
You were quiet the whole ride back to the bus, your thoughts racing with different images that had your skin on fire. You swallowed lightly when the bus pulled up to the hotel and you were pulled from your thoughts when Hayley grabbed your hand. You let her pull you off the bus and to the elevator, her squeezing your hand every so often.
You needed the two of you to be behind closed doors as soon as possible but of course, the elevator was taking its sweet time. You sighed softly when you were finally headed up to the team’s floor, your hand still tightly interlocked with Hayley's. You had to hold back a groan when she purposely missed the electronic lock with the hotel key, knowing she was doing it to get a reaction out of you.
As soon as the door was opened, you were pushing both of you through the threshold, and all but slammed the door shut behind you. You threw your kit bag to the floor and pulled her’s off her shoulder to join yours. Before she could realize what was happening, her back was pressed to the wall next to the bathroom door, your lips locked with hers in a heated kiss. Your hands pulled at her clothes as your lips easily won their fight for dominance. 
Hayley moaned into the kiss and you picked her up, her legs wrapping around your waist as you moved into the room. You lightly dropped her on the bed that had since been made by housekeeping, hovering your body over hers as you moved your lips to her neck. This time you left harsher kisses, leaving deep marks along her skin as you did so. 
Her head fell back against the pillows as you pushed her shirt up her body, pulling back slightly to lift it over her head. With her shirt out of the way, you had more access to her bare body to leave more bruise-like marks. You moved your lips back to hers as you ran a finger under the waistband of her sports bra, a sign that you wanted it off her.
You sat back some to give her room to take it off which she quickly did and you back in a similar situation to the one you were in this morning. This time though, you didn’t hide your eyes as you stared at her naked torso. You placed a few kisses in between her breasts as you kissed down her body, pushing the remaining articles of clothing to her ankles, which she kicked to the floor. 
You left deep kisses along her hip before placing a few on the inside of her thigh, earning a low moan as one of her hands tangled in your hair. You could tell how turned on she was from her teasing as well once you moved your head slightly, now face to face with her wet cunt. You placed small kisses on her sensitive clit, and a loud gasp fell from Hayley’s lips as her back arched off the bed. 
You ran your tongue through her dripping folds, her grip on your hair tightening as she pushed you closer to her. You hooked one hand around her thigh, the other trailing upwards to grope her breast, pulling her hardened nipple slightly.
“F-fuck,” Hayley stuttered as you sped up your movements, your nose hitting her clit each time you licked up. You looked up between her legs, meeting her eye just as she looked down at you. A loud moan escaped her lips when you locked eyes, her hips bucking slightly as you pleasure her.
“Please,” she begged, her hips bucking ever more as she was brought closer to her release. “I’m so-,” a loud moan interrupted her as you sucked her clit, pulling back with a small ‘pop.’
You kept your movements consistent as you fucked her, your grip on her thigh tightening as her back arched even higher. With a few more rough thrusts of your tongue, Hayley moaned loudly as she came all over your mouth. You kept going, helping her through her orgasm before she pulled slightly on your hair. 
You pulled away from her before moving back up to give her a long kiss. You both moaned at the taste of her on your lips, your tongue slipping past her lips. You pulled back to let you both breathe, it was your turn to wear the teasing smirk. 
“Next time, don’t trip me up like that, baby,” you taunted, leaning down to give her one more kiss.
Before you could process, she had the two of you flip, in the same position from this morning. “If this is how you react, I should do it more often,” she smirked as she pulled your shirt over your head.
You let her have her way with you, happy to finally have taken the next step with her. Though you both seemingly forgot you were still in camp for a bit until you joined the team for dinner later on in the evening, necks covered in hickies. You two heard more teasing from your teammates at dinner than you could have ever imagined.
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Something In The Way You Move | The Redemption
Author’s note: I struggled writing this next instalment, and there was a lot of chopping and changing, so apologies for the late update. There’s one final part after this, and the plan is to have it out by mid-May. In terms of their apartment, this is how I pictured it but feel free to switch it up. This is only for fictional purposes only, but please don’t copy my work without my permission. Enjoy 🤎
Warnings: angst, fluff, suggestive/implied smut, bad language, couple reconciling, side chick confrontation, some relationship issues, minors DNI (let me know if I missed anything)
famous!Reader x Jude Bellingham Word count: 8k words
///
‘So, Bestie,’ Winnie starts, ‘what’s the plan? And how are we going to pull this off?’
That’s a good question: how will you break the big news to Jude? It’s been five torturous days since the positive pregnancy test and you’re yet to tell him about it. The timing just hasn’t been right, and the next bit’ll sound silly, but you’ve kept this from him because you don’t want to take the attention from him. 
His first season at Real Madrid has exceeded all your wildest expectations, and you just wanted him to celebrate it all without detracting from it with the baby news. 
Girlfriend of the Year, right?
‘To be honest, Wins, I haven’t thought about it.’ 
You’re standing in the kitchen waiting for the water in the kettle to boil and Winnie’s in the living room, her limbs stretched out on the sectional as she mindlessly browses through one of the coffee table books. 
Your best friend’s in town for work, and earlier today, she actually filmed a couple of scenes with you for the show, and that’s when you told her about the pregnancy. 
Off camera, of course. However, looking back at the moment, you regret not filming it. 
Between filming your scenes, you quietly pulled Winnie to the side and showed her the sonogram you now carry around in your bag, and her reaction was exactly what you expected it to be and more. There was squealing, excited jumping, and there were lots and lots of tears shed between the two of you. 
‘Okay, well, when do you plan to tell him?’
Tonight. You think enough time has passed and yesterday, you went to your first doctor’s appointment and confirmed that you were indeed pregnant, but despite your excitement, you kept the news from Jude because you wanted the announcement to be well thought out—special.
Also, there has been so much distance between you, you’re hoping that the baby news could be the catalyst to bring you two together because you kinda miss being close to him. 
‘I’ll be honest with you, Y/N/N, that doesn’t give us much time to plan it.’ 
Winnie makes a good point, but you’re not looking for perfection, all that matters is that he knows. 
‘Well,’ the kettle boils and you walk over to where it sits on the counter to grab it, ‘it depends on what we decide on.’
You start pouring the boiling liquid into the cups.
‘My only request is that we incorporate the sonogram.’ 
‘Wouldn’t it be cute if we could find a pair of infant football boots?’ 
It’s kinda cheesy—very cheesy, actually—but you like the idea. A lot. 
‘Yeah, that’s a good idea. We’re getting somewhere with this.’
It’s almost hard to believe that you’re standing here, plotting out a way to tell Jude that you’re expecting. 
If someone had come up to you the night you first met him and told you that in two years, you’d be standing in the kitchen of your shared apartment in Madrid, planning a pregnancy reveal, you would’ve called them a liar. 
Excuse your French, but. . . ‘Holy fuck, Wins, I’m pregnant.’ 
It’s like it’s hitting you for the first time. 
Winnie laughs, amused by your sudden realisation. ‘I can’t explain it, right? But it feels like a teen pregnancy.’ 
There’s no need for her to explain it further ‘cause you know exactly what she means. When you first saw the positive pregnancy test—you know, after your initial shock—you first panicked about how your family would react to the news. 
You had to take a moment to stop and remind yourself that even though you’re still so young, you’re more than capable of raising this child. 
With Jude’s assistance, of course.
‘Do you want to record it?’
‘Record what?’ 
You take the steaming mugs from the island and make your way over to the living room, where you place them onto the coffee table. 
‘The moment you tell him. Not for Netflix,’ she clarifies, ‘but you know, home videos or whatever.’ 
Yeah, you’re definitely keeping this one in the family. Maybe if the show gets renewed for a second season. . . but you’re jumping the gun. 
‘I want to, but’ you look around the ostentatiously decorated main living space ‘where can we put the camera? I don’t want him to see it.’ 
‘We’ll figure it out.’ 
Winnie’s composure is just what you need right now. You can always count on her to be calm in stressful situations. 
‘Is your camera charged?’
You’ll have to check. It’s been some time since you last used it. Part of your job is that you’re a part time YouTuber, it’s something you dabble in because you like filming and editing. . . all that jazz, but lately, your channel has taken the backseat. 
Why vlog this period of your life when they can catch it on Netflix when the show comes out? 
‘Come,’ Winnie shifts to make space for you on the couch. 
You take your seat next to her and by the time you settle, she’s already got her phone out, with her Pinterest open. 
‘What’s that for?’
‘Well, something’s got to inspire us.’ 
Duh. It must be the pregnancy fog. 
‘Don’t worry,’ she assures. ‘We’ve got this.’
And got this you do. A half hour and two cold teas later, there’s a plan, but this plan requires you to leave the house. 
Booooo! 
You’re not too keen on the impromptu outing, but there are baby football boots to be bought, and at least you’ll have Winnie there with you. 
‘Well, that was easy.’
You beg to differ, but whatever. 
Winnie locks her phone and sets it on the couch, ‘When’s The Boy coming home?’
You’re not sure when it started, but Winnie now refers to Jude as “The Boy” which you find to be endearing. 
Probably late. He’s out with Toby and Noah, and he mentioned something about his other teammates joining them, but you weren’t really paying attention. 
‘I’m not sure.’ 
And it’s not something you wish to discuss further because the thought fills you with dread. It’s been days since your discovery but given the circumstances, there has been no time to sit down and talk about Coralie. 
The result of that is that whenever he goes out—and he’s been going out plenty to celebrate his victorious season—you can’t help but feel anxious that he might cheat on you again. 
Surely this is no way to live. 
‘But it doesn’t matter, does it?’ you rise off of the couch and start for the bedroom. 
Naturally, Winnie’s trailing after you and you just know that this conversation is far from over. She’s persistent. 
‘It doesn’t, but I think you should ask him.’ 
She makes it sound so simple. And you guess it is simple, he is your boyfriend after all, it’s your privilege to call or text him whenever and wherever. 
‘We don’t want any surprises.’
You don’t, but if he does walk into something he’s not supposed to walk into, that’s all on him. 
‘I don’t think it’s necessary, really.’
Inside the walk-in closet, you start stripping out of your house sweats to change into something appropriate. Once upon a time, you could leave your house in your house clothes without the fear of being pasted on the MailOnline and labelled “dowdy” and “unkempt”.
But that was a long time ago.  
‘Oooh, what’s this?’
Winnie finds herself distracted by the Chloé box that’s sitting on the closet island. 
‘Oh, yeah, that’s a PR box they sent me on Monday,’ you state matter-of-factly. 
She opens it and gasps when she sees what’s inside the large box. 
‘What the. . .’ 
‘It’s crazy, right?’ 
She turns to you in utter disbelief. ‘They gifted these to you?’ 
You hum.
She grunts and confesses, ‘I’m so jealous of you right now.’ 
Twelve full sized perfumes, all gifted to you by the brand. 
You tell her to take a bottle, and of course, she’s over the moon. And it earns you the title of World’s Best Best Friend. 
‘Well, I still think you should text him,’ she states as she tests the different scents. 
And here you thought she had forgotten about that. 
‘Just so we have an idea.’ 
You don’t really want to send the text, but you don’t want to raise any alarms with your friend. Lately, things between you and Jude have been far from perfect, but you’d prefer to keep your relationship problems from the world—even if it’s Winnie and she’s your best friend. 
‘Yeah, alright.’ 
Your phone’s in the living room, so you have to leave the closet to grab it, and when you come back, Winnie’s discovered your new Chanel handbag—a gift from Jude. 
‘He bought this for you?’ 
‘Yeah,’ but you’re not trying to make a big deal of it. 
Jude bought the bag for you about a month ago. At the time, it seemed so random—his urge to buy such an expensive gift on a whim—, but after seeing those text messages, you know it was the guilt that made him do it. 
‘Lucky bitch.’
‘I’ve been telling you to bag yourself a baller,’ you tease as you take your seat on one of the ottomans. 
You: Hey, when are you coming back tonight?
You read over the text to make sure you’re not coming off as desperate. . . a nag. But whatever, the text needs to be sent, and the way he interprets it is up to him. 
He doesn’t immediately respond, but you don’t expect him to. He never does when he’s out. 
You take a final look in the mirror. You look so good, it’s almost hard to believe that the look was put together in ten minutes. And you’d take a picture to post on your story, but there’s no time for that now. 
‘You ready, Wins?’ 
She smiles, ‘Ready.’ 
‘Alright then, let’s go.’ 
///
When he did finally respond to your text, Jude said that he’d try to be home by midnight, which gave you more than enough time to prepare for the reveal. 
For her visit, Winnie will be staying at the apartment with you, but she’s gone out because she’s not pregnant and she’s actually got a life. However, she did help you set everything up for the reveal, which you appreciated because she came with all the good ideas. 
Like she suggested that you do it in your closet as opposed to the kitchen, where you had initially planned to do it, because the lighting and acoustics were better. 
And now it’s a little past eleven o’clock and you’re rewatching an old episode of your favourite series. Earlier in the night—after Winnie left—you filmed a night time routine vlog for your TikTok, which you should be working on editing, but can’t be bothered about.
Waiting for Jude to come home has reduced you to a ball of anxiety, and despite your eyelids getting heavier and heavier with each passing minute, you simply can’t make yourself fall asleep. However, one thing’s certain, no pregnancy reveal will be done tonight. 
Damn him, and damn your feelings for him.
You can’t believe he’s once again ditched you for his friends this week. It’s disrespectful at this point, but the worst part? 
You keep allowing him to get away with it. 
But what can you do, leave him? As if that’s an option for you. The love you feel for him runs so deep, you can’t bring yourself to imagine a life without him in it, especially with the baby coming. So apologies to all the feminists of the world, but your love for this man surpasses all reasoning. 
Your phone dings with a notification and you quickly grab it, hoping to find a text from him—you’ll take an incoherent drunken text at this point, anything—but instead it’s Winnie asking if he’s home yet. 
Fuck. 
You: Not yet, but soon :) 
You hope. 
She’ll never confront you about it, but you think that Winnie suspects that things aren’t good between you and Jude. The lack of calls and texts throughout the day was a dead giveaway. The two of you can’t get enough of each other, and even when you’re apart, you’re constantly updating each other one way or another so the silence was deafening.
But whatever, right? 
People across the world experience relationship problems every day. You’re not the first couple to experience this, and you’re certainly not the last. You just wish that your relationship problems weren’t because he stepped out on you. 
‘Babe?’ 
And now your mind’s playing tricks on you, because you swear you can hear him–
‘Y/N?’
Oh shit, he’s home!
You quickly reach for your phone to check the time: 11:26.
Fuck! 
In the last text you sent him almost an hour ago now, you gave him strict instructions to text you before he left the club. 
Guess he didn’t catch that text. 
‘Baby?’ he calls for you again, but his voice sounds distant, so you figure you have enough time to do what it is that you have to do.  
But you’ve got to move fast, so you clamber off of the bed, and scurry to your closet. You head straight to the camera, which you’ve carefully propped on your Louis Vuitton jewellery box, and switch it on to start recording. 
This probably isn’t the best of angles, but so long as it captures his reaction, hopefully with his face in the frame. 
‘Baaaaybeeee?’ 
His voice sounds closer now. 
‘In the closet, babe,’ you finally call back, then internally brace yourself for what’s to follow. 
With Jude, the plan was always to get married and have children, but the when was never discussed in detail. 
‘Why are you hiding in here?’ 
Some of that anxiety leaves your body at the sight of him. He’s beaming at you, so visibly happy to see you. 
‘Hiya.’
This man has seen you in all kinds of vulnerable situations, why are you so shy all of a sudden? 
As he closes the distance between you, you notice that his eyes are kinda red and glossy, the only sign of his intoxication. When he reaches you, his smile widens—if that’s even possible—and he leans forward to connect your foreheads. 
‘Hi, gorgeous.’ 
He smells of mint with the faint scent of alcohol, and a smell you can only describe as Jude on a night out. 
With your eyes shut, you deeply inhale the comforting scent, happy to have him back home. 
‘Hey, why are you hiding in here?’ he asks again, his words running into each other, the second sign. 
‘Uh, ‘cause.’
You weren’t anticipating that question, and you don’t know how to answer it. 
‘“‘Cause?”’ he chuckles. 
You hum.
‘Come here,’ he envelops you in his large and strong arms, practically suffocating you but you can’t bring yourself to tell him to release you because you’ve missed his affection and the intimacy.
You fear you’re starting to sound like a broken record. 
‘How was it?’
‘How was what?’
‘The club?’
‘Fine.’ 
And that’s all he’s willing to offer.
‘I thought you said Winnie was staying over?’ 
She is, she’s just gone to a party with the new guy she’s seeing. 
‘And you didn’t join her?’ 
‘No.’ 
You give him a half-baked explanation for why you didn’t, but all you’re thinking is how this isn’t going the way you hoped for it to go. This isn’t what the other significant others did in the videos you watched earlier.
But how do you save it?
‘Why are you asking about her?’
‘Just curious, I guess.’ 
‘Alright then,’ you fist his jacket in your hand. ‘It’s good to have you back home.’
He likes that, you know that because his heart rate picks up. Things are still a bit awkward between you, but that’s to be expected since you haven’t been talking much. 
With your arms around his neck, you press onto your toes and crane your neck to peck him on the lips. ‘And actually, babe, there’s something I want to show you.’
Jude tenses up at that, but it’s so subtle, if you weren’t in his arms, you would’ve missed it. 
‘You do?’ 
And like magic, he’s sobered up. Only a bit though. 
‘Don’t worry,’ you assure him, amused. ‘It’s nothing bad.’ 
Your assurance does nothing to ease his wound up body. 
‘Jude, relax. . . please.’ 
Still tense. Whatever, you won’t dwell on his anxiety. 
With a final peck to his lips, you step away from him and direct his attention to the island, where the football booties you went out to buy earlier are placed next to a toddler Real Madrid jersey, a positive pregnancy test—you took another one a couple of hours ago—and the sonogram.
‘Surprise,’ you say softly. 
You want to sound excited, but it just comes out dejected.
You watch as he takes it in, your heart hammering against your chest. Unfortunately for you, you only have a view of his side profile but even from this angle, you can see that his usually expressive face is perfectly still. You can’t read him, and it feels like an eternity before he turns to face you.
‘Is this for real?’ 
You nod, the lump that has found a home in your throat making it hard to speak. Your vision’s also blurred, courtesy of the tears that have pooled in your eyes. 
‘It is?’
The first tear falls. 
‘Oh, baby.’ 
Jude lifts you into his arms and squeezes all the air from your lungs. 
Man, he’s so strong. 
Then he sort of holds you like that for a long time, and the next thing you know, your neck is damp. 
‘Babe, are you. . are you crying?’ 
He denies it, but you can feel the damp spot grow with each passing second you’re in his arms. Oh goodness, he is. 
‘I think you are.’ 
‘Shut up,’ he mutters, his voice muffled. 
You giggle when he tickles you. 
His reaction’s quite the relief and it feels like a ginormous load has been lifted off your shoulders. In terms of his reaction, you weren’t sure what to expect, but this is the best reaction possible, and as he holds you, all the lingering resentment about his past transgressions are forgotten.
Eventually, he sets you down to reveal his red rimmed eyes and similarly hued nose. 
‘How far along are you?’ 
Seven weeks and three days today, according to your doctor. When Dr Hernandez told you, you couldn’t believe you were so far along and didn’t notice. 
‘That’s what, almost two months?’ 
In defence of you though, between your work and Jude’s chaotic football schedule, you’ve been out of touch with your body. 
‘Did you know?’
‘I suspected it.’ You tell him about the morning after that night when you noticed that your period was late.  ‘I wanted to tell you, but I wanted to take the test first.’
‘And why didn’t you tell me after?’ 
‘I wanted the doctor to confirm it.’ 
You’ve grown so tired of standing, so you sit on the carpeted floor of the closet, and Jude joins you, pushing the ottoman to one side so that he can lean against the island. 
‘I called Dr Morena who referred me to Dr Hernandez.’
He scowls, ‘Who’s that?’ 
‘My obstetrician.’
The scowl deepens.
You sigh, ‘The doctor who’ll care for me during the pregnancy.’
‘Oh.’ With his legs spread and stretched out before him, he pulls you into him and sets you between them. ‘And you said that Dr Morena referred you to this. . .’
‘Obstetrician.’
‘Yeah, that.’
You hum in agreement as you rest your back against his torso. 
Dr Morena is your family GP.  
There’s a silent beat then he asks, ‘So he knew before me?’
‘Winnie too,’ you turn your head so that you’re partially facing him. ‘I’m sorry.’
‘Winnie knew before me?’ 
The offence is evident in his voice.
‘I had to tell her,’ you defend, but this isn’t where you want to steer the conversation. ‘She helped me set this all up.’
He grunts.
‘Are you mad at me?’ 
‘Kinda.’ 
Well, now you feel bad. 
‘I’m sorry,’ you sit up and turn to face him, maintaining eye contact as you explain, ‘Had I known it would’ve offended you, I wouldn’t have done it.’
But she was so integral in all of this, a part of you’s glad you did. . . 
‘Oh, come on, Jude.’
He’s pouting, your big baby.
‘Cheer up, will you?’ you straddle him, cupping his face to gently stroke his cheek with your thumb. ‘I’m really sorry.’
It’s about another minute of silence and avoided eye contact, and you’re about to give up and on the verge of tears when: 
‘Babe, I’m only messing with you.’ 
A quiet beat, then there’s relief, followed by loud laughter. 
‘That wasn’t funny,’ you grouse, slapping him lightly on his chest. ‘I almost cried, you know.’
‘Come here,’ he pulls you into him. 
The traces of alcohol still linger in his speech, but he’s significantly sobered up since he got home ten minutes ago. 
‘I can’t believe you’re pregnant.’ 
And you can’t remember the last time Jude was this excited about something outside of football. His reaction almost makes you wish you had waited to share the news with him on his birthday, but that wouldn’t have worked because he’ll be in Germany then with the national team for the Euros. 
‘What are you thinking?’ 
‘How the pill doesn’t work a hundred percent,’ you pull away. 
But then again, with all the jet setting you’ve been doing, you probably weren’t taking it at the same time every day. 
With a flash of his signature smile, he concurs. 
‘My knees are starting to hurt,’ you announce as you move off of his lap and back to your previous spot between his legs. 
Jude places a hand over your stomach, and with your hands over his larger ones, you move them lower to the pelvic area.
‘There.’ 
He chuckles. ‘You know, I always dreamed of being a young dad.’
You didn’t know this about him.
‘Not at twenty-one,’ he continues, ‘but you know, in my twenties.’ 
It’s comforting to know that this baby fits into his life plan.��
‘How about you?’
‘I don’t know,’ you admit after a moment of consideration.
You’re still wrapping your head around the turn your life’s taken. The WAG thing kinda blindsided you, the fame too. The craziest part of this all is that you’ve made a career of it, built an entire brand. 
‘But I’m not mad at this plot twist.’ 
‘Our kid’s a plot twist?’ he chuckles. 
You nod. ‘Clearly we weren’t paying attention in sex education.’ 
He kisses the top of your head. 
‘Dr Hernandez said that the baby’s about the size of a blueberry,’ you tell him.
It’s such a random fact, but you feel compelled to share it with him. 
‘That’s really tiny.’
‘Right?’ 
Jude keeps rubbing over the area, and you have an inkling he’ll make a habit of this. 
Some minutes pass, and then you remember that the camera’s still going, so you excuse yourself from Jude. 
‘Where’re you going?’ 
His grip is firm around your waist. 
‘I’m going to get the camera.’
He looks confused, but he releases you. On bended knees, you shuffle over to the other end of the island to quickly grab it, but you don’t stop the recording. When you get back to Jude, you find him in a daze, silently staring at the sonogram in his hand. 
‘She’s so tiny,’ he comments when you sit at your previous spot, facing him. 
‘She?’ 
Talk about wanting to be a girl dad.
‘You think the baby’s a girl?’ 
He looks up to find a camera in his face. ‘What, you think it’s a boy?’
You shrug, you haven’t actually given it much thought. ‘Well, do you think you can handle a mini me?’
He makes a face. 
‘Ah, take it back,’ you giggle. 
He takes the camera and turns the lens to you. ‘Well, now I’m asking you. Y/N, do you think Baby Bellingham’s a girl or a boy?’ 
You pause to think about it. A mini you or a mini Jude, how difficult. ‘Well, I’m going the opposite, I think Baby Bellinghamʼs a boy.’
You snuggle into him, ear pressed against his chest, camera still in your face, but you’re both in the frame. One fact people don’t know about your boyfriend is that he’s a master vlogger, and he’s actually recorded many segments for your vlogs that will never see the light of day because when it comes to Jude, you’re a shameless gatekeeper. 
‘I want to shower before bed,’ he proclaims once the recording has stopped. ‘Join me?’ 
You’ve already taken your shower, but you figure a second one wouldn’t hurt. Jude takes your hand and leads you out of the closet and into the bathroom, where you strip out of your clothes. 
‘Is it my imagination, or are your boobs getting bigger?’
Huh? 
You look down at your exposed breasts, ‘Are you joking?’
‘No, I’m not,’ with a hand on each shoulder, he turns you towards the mirror. ‘Look.’ 
You’re looking at them, but they still look the same to you, but he’s adamant. Then, in a move you deem perverted—in a good way, of course—, he cups them in his hands. 
‘What are you doing?’ At this point, you can’t contain your laughter. 
‘How are you not seeing this?’ 
He must’ve drank more than you realise, because what the fuck is this? 
‘Are you high?’ 
His face twists with disapproval, ‘No, why?’ 
‘The boobs,’ you turn to him, ‘what’s with the sudden fascination with them?’
‘I like your boobs, you know this.’ 
You do. And you like his butt. 
‘Come,’ you wrap your hand around his wrist and pull him into the shower. ‘I think you’re tired.’
And horny. 
You turn the faucet to run the water. 
As you’d imagine, not much showering is done. 
‘Careful not to wet your hair,’ you warn him, but it’s too late.
‘I don’t care,’ he says flippantly as he takes your face between his hands and leans over to kiss you. 
This is not what you came here to do. 
You’re both covered in suds. 
‘Jude, I need to rinse my body.’
‘Later,’ he mutters against your lips. 
‘Jude!’ you squeal. 
He’s such a Silly Billy when he wants to be.
You gasp into his passionate kiss when you suddenly feel the cold shower wall against your back. In a swift and slick movement, Jude trails kisses across your left shoulder and you tilt your head to one side to give him better access to your neck.
A soft moan escapes your parted lips as he sucks on the sensitive skin. 
‘Jude. . .’
You want to tell him to stop, but the hand on his naked lower back pulls him into to you. 
He hums into the kiss as his hand moves up your body to cup your boob, ‘Tonight, you’ve made me the happiest man alive.’ 
His vulnerability catches you off guard, how can you not give into him. . .
///
For breakfast this morning, you’re making honey butter toast using a recipe you found on the internet. It’s your first time making it and you’re not entirely sure what you’re doing here, but Jude saw it on Pinterest the other week and begged you to make it, so that’s what he’ll have for breakfast. 
It’s a simple enough recipe, but knowing you and your iffy cooking skills, this could either be a major success or an epic fail—nothing in the middle. If it does fail though, you’ve got the regular bacon and egg fry-up on standby. 
But only positive thoughts in this kitchen. 
You’ve got your favourite morning playlist going softly in the background, and today’s what you consider the perfect Saturday morning. The sun is fully out, and the expansive windows of the apartment allow for the natural light to pour into the space and warms it. 
You put the toast into the oven and set the timer. 
At the end of the summer, your lease for this apartment will be up, but the likelihood of you extending it has significantly shrunk with the latest development in your life. The song goes, “First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes Y/N with a baby carriage,” but you’ve skipped parts, so some things need to be shifted around. 
That means that the house hunting that you’ve been putting off needs to start. . . now, really. 
This is where Coralie comes in handy, but you’re not talking to her. She actually reached out to you Sunday morning to apologise for your awkward encounter at the restaurant that night. Her text read: 
Coralie: Last night, I overstepped and I’m really sorry and embarrassed by my actions. Please forgive me. 
You’re yet to respond to the text, but you don’t plan to anytime soon because you don’t accept her stupid apology. As far as you’re concerned, she’s an insignificant homewrecker. She is two-faced and vindictive and incredibly cruel for subjecting you to such humiliation. 
She laughed with you, acted like a friend when she was fucking your man behind your back for six months. 
‘Bitch,’ you mumble as you load the dishes into the wash.
But she’s not worth the time, emotions, nor the energy. So with a deep breath, you bop thoughts of her out of your mind, and move on with your day. 
Easy. 
A half hour later, breakfast is ready to be served. You’ve gone all out with this meal, and it would be an absolute shame to not take a picture to post onto your IG story. Very quickly, you snap a picture to post later, and take the food to your sleeping boyfriend before the ice-cream starts to melt. 
He’s still fast asleep, but he’s since shifted sleeping positions, and he’s hugging your pillow. 
How cute? 
When he wakes up, you expect him to be hungover and grouchy from all his boozing, and you just know he’ll play it up for attention. If there’s one thing you know about your boyfriend it’s that he dies for attention, and he simply cannot resist being babied. 
‘Wakey wakey sleepyhead.’ 
You place the heavy tray onto the bedside table, on the other side of it to avoid it getting bumped by mistake, and attempt to wake him again. 
Still, nothing. 
‘Jude,’ you mount him, peppering a million tiny kisses against the side of his pretty face. Even in his slumber, he looks perfect. ‘Come on, you got your eight hours, it’s time to wake up.’ 
He grunts, then sends you away. 
‘But I got food,’ you object with feigned sadness. 
But he doesnʼt budge. 
Alright, sweet coaxing out the window. ‘Babe, I made honey butter toast and the ice-cream’s rapidly melting. Wake up.’ 
There’s another silent beat and then, ‘What the hell is that?’ 
Of course he doesn’t remember what it is.
‘Honey butter toast,’ you repeat, as if it’ll somehow miraculously make him know what it is. ‘That bread you saw on Pinterest and begged me to make.’
He’s still clueless, but at least you’ve got his attention. Finally, with a long groan, he sits up, moving cautiously to not send you tumbling to the floor. 
‘What time is it?’
‘Ten.’ 
He cusses softly as he rubs his face. ‘I’m supposed to meet with my parents at eleven.’
You didn’t know that. 
But it’s clearly nothing pressing because he doesn’t seem fazed by the fact that he’s running late. He yawns, rubs his eyes and face some more, then turns to you—sitting comfortably on his lap—and smiles. ‘Good morning.’ 
You mirror his expression. ‘Morning. You hungry?’
‘Starving. What’s for breakfast?’
‘Here,’ you slide off his lap to take the tray and hand it to him. ‘It’s my first time making it, so be nice.’
He assesses the tray of food you’ve placed before him, then looks back up at you. ‘Nine out of ten for the presentation.’
Your brows furrow, ‘Why not ten?’ 
‘Some of the ice-cream has melted and it looks a bit sloppy.’ 
‘Yeah, and who’s fault is that?’ 
He lets out a hearty laugh, but you’re not amused by this judge. 
You climb back onto the bed, your eyes fixed on Jude as he puts the first forkful of the honey butter toast, with a little bit of the vanilla ice-cream and salted caramel sauce, into his mouth.
He chews, then he moans, his eyes widen, more chewing, and then finally, he swallows. 
This is a good reaction. 
‘You like it?’ 
‘I love it,’ he cuts another piece of the toast. ‘Ten out of ten for the taste. Did you make the ice-cream and caramel sauce yourself?’
‘Alright, Paul Hollywood.’ You grab the extra fork you had on the tray and dig in—curious about the taste—and are met with protests from Jude. ‘I just want a little taste.’ 
‘Get your own.’ 
Your bottom lip juts out, it’s your turn to pout. ‘Yeah, but I’m pregnant.’ 
With a heavy sigh, he proclaims, ‘And so it starts.’
You can’t help but laugh at his solemn tone. 
The two of you remain in bed, even after he’s finished having his breakfast, because his outing with his parents has now been postponed to two o’clock. If it were any other day, you’d join them, but you promised to accompany Winnie to the art gallery and you don’t think you can get out of it. 
Turning into your side, Jude questions, ‘Why does she have to go to the art gallery?’ 
Because she’s in her art girl era, inspired by her latest fling, an up-and-coming visual artist from Portugal. His name’s Baltasar, and they met at Coachella a couple months back, and lately, he’s all she ever talks about. You think she’s in love. 
‘A visual artist?’ 
‘Yep.’ 
‘So he’s broke?’ 
‘Hey, don’t be mean,’ you chide. 
He doesn’t care though, he thinks it’s funny. 
‘You’re such an asshole, d’you know that?’ 
‘Babe, I’m just kidding.’ 
Yeah, right. 
‘Well, she really likes him so if she mentions it to you, keep the bad jokes to yourself.’ 
‘Noted,’ his mouth connects with your cheek.
The conversation smoothly transitions from Winnie’s new boyfriend to Jobe, who’s relentlessly trying to convince his older brother to take a short trip to Ibiza before he has to report for international duty. You think it’s a great idea, a final hoorah before it gets serious again.
‘Will you come with?’
‘Ibiza sober? Count me out.’
‘I’ll drink for the both of us.’ 
‘Uh, definitely not,’ your fingers glide up and down his naked back. ‘And I think Jobe wants this to be a boy’s trip. No girlfriends.’
‘But you’re not my girlfriend.’ 
Huh? ‘I’m not?’ 
‘You recently got upgraded to baby mum.’ 
He’s an idiot. Who even laughs at their own jokes this much? Either way, you’re not going to Ibiza with them. It’s another half hour of mindless chatter before you ask,
‘What time is it?’ 
‘Early.’ 
‘Jude, I’m being serious,’ you reach blindly for your phone and find it on the other end of the bed. ‘I need to start getting ready.’ 
‘Can’t you postpone it for another day?’
‘Winnie leaves tomorrow night.’ 
But he’s not budging, and so you have to use all of your might to shove him off of you. 
Your strength leaves him shook. ‘Where’d that come from?’ 
‘It’s all those training sessions you’re paying for.’
He swells with pride—men. 
‘Will you join me?’
Jude perks up. 
‘But we’re only showering, nothing else.’ 
And he’s dejected. 
‘I’ll just sit on the side and watch.’ 
That’s fine by you. 
He follows you into the bathroom, and you think you hear him mumble something about you making it worth his while. 
///
What your gallery date conveniently forgot to mention was that Baltasar would be joining your gallery excursion. Had you known he’d be here, you would’ve asked Jude to tag along so it could be a double date or something.  
Jude: How’s it going? 🖼️
You’re miserable here, and you’re pretty sure you’re third wheeling. And look, you want to be supportive of your best friend, right? But it’s so hard to be when the guy she’s seeing’s the textbook definition of an asshole. 
You’re one pretentious comment away from faking morning sickness to get out of this. 
You: I’m having the worst time
You: The art is great, but he’s so smug 🙄
And he’s rude, so rude, and he’s determined to talk over you. 
Jude: The artist? 🎨🧑‍🎨
You: Yeah, I don’t think he likes me :/ 
And you’d actually be doing him a favour by leaving, you’d be doing you both the favour because at this point, you feel like you’re intruding and you’re starting to feel awkward. 
Jude: Well fuck him 
His text makes you chortle. 
At least Winnie’s making an effort to include you. Every now and again, she’ll ask for your opinion on certain pieces, but in the end, you just can’t do it. 
You can’t be here anymore. 
‘Hey,’ you lightly tap Winnie’s shoulder.
She turns to regard you, ‘Hey, what’s up?’
‘Can I talk to you for a second?’ 
‘Sure.’
She excuses herself from Baltasar, who’s really displeased with your intrusion, and you find a quiet corner. 
‘Is everything okay?’
‘Yeah, everything’s fine, the art’s great, but I’m not feeling too hot.’
‘Oh no,’ her brows knit in concern, ‘is it morning sickness?’ 
She’s buying it, good. 
‘I think I’m going to head home, you know, to lie down for a couple hours.’ 
‘Yeah, alright,’ she takes your hand in hers and lightly squeezes it. 
‘But how will you get back to the apartment?’ 
You are her ride home after all. 
‘I was planning on spending the rest of the afternoon with Baltasar,’ she looks over her shoulder at him and when she looks back at you, she’s blushing, ‘but what about you? Are you fine to drive in your condition?’ 
‘It’s just a little nausea, I promise I’ll be fine.’ 
It takes a minute to convince her, but you don’t relent, and in the end, you manage to convince her. 
‘Now go,’ you nudge her towards her waiting love interest. ‘Have fun with your boyfriend–’
‘Uh, he’s not my boyfriend,’ she quickly interjects, her voice dropping to a scolding whisper. 
You smile knowingly, sure he isn’t. 
‘What makes you say he’s my boyfriend? Did he say something to you?’
‘No, but I saw the way you were looking at him,’ you shrug, ‘the way he was looking at you.’ 
Winnie’s uncharacteristically shy all of a sudden. 
‘I’ve clearly misread the situation,’ you start backing away from her. ‘But we’ll talk more about it later, okay?’
‘Promise to text me when you get home.’ 
‘I pinky promise to call you when I get home,’ you blow her a kiss. 
You wave goodbye to Baltsar, who seems pleased to see you go, and then you’re out of there. 
It’s a short drive home from the gallery, and you’re glad to be back home, but you wish Jude was here with you.
You: I miss you.
As soon as the message’s sent, you regret sending it. But you can always blame pregnancy for making you so clingy. 
You fall back onto the bed with a long exhale. What to do with your time? You could watch a movie or you could go the self-care route. 
The other day, a skincare brand sent you a few collagen face masks you’ve been dying to try. It’s one of those that melts into your skin. And since you’re on that path, you can also soak in the tub ‘cause you haven’t done that in a while. And if you’re really up to it, maybe you can do your nails. 
But first: 
You: Got home safe. Have fun with your friend ;) can’t wait to hear about it later x
Jude misses you too. He’s also still with his parents but should be home before dinner.  
You: Did you tell them about… 🫄
Jude: No. I thought we’d do it together.
That’s a good plan. 
You: Great idea. I’ll see you later, I love you x
Jude: I love you more 😘
Dinner time’s a while away, so you’ve got plenty of time to have your self-care afternoon. 
The tub is halfway full, the bubbles foaming, the steam and aroma engulfing the space when your phone notifies you that someone’s at the door. 
Your body’s sheathed by a robe, but you still feel indecent as you make your way to the door. 
The doorbell goes off a second time just before you reach the door, and when you open it, the last person you expect to find standing on the other side of it is Coralie. 
Yes, Coralie’s at your door and she looks like. . . Well, she looks like shit. 
‘Y/N,’ she forces her lips into a tight smile. ‘Hi.’ 
The shock has you frozen for a moment, but you’re quick to recover. ‘Jude’s not home.’ 
You’re curt because you want her out of your sight and you’ve left the water running in the bathroom. 
‘I know he isn’t.’
She does?
‘I’m not here to see Jude, I’m actually here to see you.’
Of course she’s here to see you. 
‘Why?’
‘‘Cause there’s so much we need to talk about, woman to woman.’ 
“Woman to woman”, what a joke? And it takes everything in you to stop your eyes from rolling. What the fuck does that even mean?
‘Can’t we schedule this for another time? I’m kinda in a rush.’
‘It won’t take long, I promise.’ 
Hell, she can’t take a hint, can she?
‘Can I come in?’
‘We can’t talk about whatever it is here?’ you tighten your grip around the door handle to stop your hand from shaking. ‘I mean, you said it yourself, it won’t take long.’
‘Yeah, but it’s weird doing it at the door, so can I come in?’
‘You’re in no position to call the shots.’ 
‘Please,’ she sounds desperate. ‘I just need ten minutes of your time, then I promise I’ll go.’ 
The more you look at her, the worse she looks. Honestly, she looks like she’s been to hell and back, and if you didn’t hate her so much, you’d feel sympathy. 
‘Ten minutes, then you have to leave.’ 
‘That’s all I ask, thank you.’
And so despite your better judgement, you step to one side to allow her into the apartment. As you shut the door, you offer her a drink.
‘I’ll have a water, thank you.’
‘We’ve got water in the fridge.’ You walk towards your bedroom to shut off the running water, ‘I’ll be with you in a moment.’ 
On the short trek, you dig your phone from your robe pocket. 
You: Coralie’s here she says she wants to talk but i’m uneasy
You shut the faucet. You quickly change out of your robe into the first clothing items you stumble upon, which are the sweats Jude was wearing earlier. They’re loosely fitting, but they’re comforting because they smell like him.
Coralie’s in the living room, bottle of water in hand, and she’s focused on something out the window. 
‘Sorry I took so long.’
Your sudden intrusion snaps her out of her reverie, ‘It’s fine.’ 
Her eyes are fixed on you as you move around the space to take your seat on the sectional, feet tucked beneath your bum. 
This is so awkward. 
‘So,’ you start, breaking the ice, ‘you said you wanted to talk?’
You heard Jude out, so it’s only fair that you hear Coralie’s side of the story. 
‘Right,’ she clears her throat. ‘I assume you know about our. . .’
‘Affair?’
She winces at your choice of words. 
‘Yeah, I do.’
‘And he told you everything?’ 
‘That you got drunk last December and hooked up? That you’ve been hooking up behind my back for the last six months?’
She sits perfectly still, but her trembling lower lip betrays her. 
‘That you were sending inappropriate texts, pictures, and videos. . .’ you continue, pleased to see her squirm in her seat. ‘Am I missing anything else?’ 
It’s only been, what? Five days since you last saw her, but in the short time span, she’s aged a decade. Coralie’s never disclosed her age, but you’ve always placed her in her late-twenties, maybe early-thirties, but today she looks well into her forties.
‘How did you find out?’
‘I saw the drunk text you sent him, what did it say again?’ you pause for dramatic effect. ‘Right, “I’m drunk and I miss you. Call me.”’ 
She’s fidgeting with the bottle in her hand, her head bowing in shame. ‘Y/N, I’m really sorry.’
‘What are you apologising for?’
‘All of it.’ She looks up at you, ‘I’m sorry that you found out the way you did.’ 
You hear her, but you’re not ready to accept her apology. Especially because she’s cutting into your self-care time with this crap. 
‘Who made the first move?’ 
‘Jude did.’
Your heart aches at the revelation, it’s like someone has driven a sharp knife into it. 
‘He was upset at you, he didn’t say why but he was really cut up about a fight you had,’ she proceeds. ‘And if it wasn’t me, it would’ve been someone else.’
You think you might throw up. 
‘But he was drunk, we both were, and. . .’ her voice trails. 
An uncomfortable silence descends upon the room because really, what else is there to say? 
‘Do you love him?’ 
‘Does it matter?’
It doesn’t matter, but you want to know. Let’s say it’s curiosity.
‘He’s hard not to love.’
That’s true.
‘But am I in love with him? No.’ 
Some of the tension in your shoulders eases. 
‘And he doesn’t love me either,’ and she almost sounds sad when she says that. ‘It was only ever sex between us, nothing more.’
But the texts. . . what did they mean? 
‘Nothing,’ she insists. ‘Call it harmless flirtation.’
‘Harmless?’
She flushes, ‘You know what I mean.’ 
So you now know that he was mad at you, they were both drunk, they fucked and you think Coralie regrets it, but you’re not sure. 
‘Who pursued it?’ 
‘What?’ 
‘Your. . . thing, the affair,’ it irks you to say it. 
‘Oh, Y/N, I don’t think you–’ 
‘Was it Jude?’ 
‘He loves you.’
‘I know he loves me.’ 
Coralie’s quiet which furthers your frustration at her. 
‘Did he pursue the affair?’
‘Why does it matter? It doesn’t change anything because in the end, he chose you.’ It’s like it pains her to say it. ‘He’ll always choose you.’
You nod. 
After another long and awkward silence, she professes, ‘You know, I felt awful deceiving you because you really are such a good person.’
‘Don’t start with that crap.’ 
‘No, I mean it. You’re a good person, and we were friends–’
‘We were never friends,’ you interrupt. ‘You were never my friend.’ 
You tolerated her, there’s a difference. 
‘I know you’re upset with me, and trust me, I get it, but come on,’ she persists. ‘We were friendly with each other.’ 
‘You sleep with all your friends’ boyfriends?’ 
That shuts her up. 
‘Look, Coralie, I appreciate the apology,’ you pull your phone from the sweatpants pocket to check the time and discover eight missed calls from Jude. ‘But you said you’d be here for ten minutes, and you’ve exceeded that time.’ 
‘I know, and I’m really sorry about that, but there’s one last thing I want to tell you.’ 
Your stomach twists with dread—she better not tell you that she’s pregnant. The cheating you can move past, but a child you can’t recover from. 
‘You’re pregnant?’ 
‘What?’ She looks offended that you’d even ask her that question. ‘No, I’m not pregnant.’
You sigh in relief. 
She’s not pregnant, but she did lose her job. She received the call this morning to let her know that her services were no longer required by the club. She’s certain Jude had something to do with it, so she’s here to plead with you to talk sense into him. 
‘And I meant what I said, I really am sorry for the inconvenience that I’ve caused in your life, but Y/N, I really need this job,’ she concludes. 
‘How are you so sure he had something to do with it?’ 
She shoots you an incredulous look as if to say, ‘Really?’ 
‘And if he did have something to do with it, what makes you think he’d listen to anything I have to say?’ 
‘Because you told him to end our arrangement and he did.’
‘But you said it yourself, you mean nothing to him.’ 
She flinches again. 
‘I mean, I can try to talk to him, but I can’t promise you anything.’ 
‘Thank you,’ she smiles. ‘That’s all I ask.’ 
‘Well, like I said, I have somewhere to be so–’
You don’t get to finish the sentence, ‘cause you’re cut off by a panicked Jude who storms into the apartment, followed by an equally panicked Mark. 
‘Babe?’ 
Thank the heavens he’s here.
///
You wake up in the middle of the night to find Jude’s side of the bed empty. At first you think he’s in the bathroom, but when five minutes pass and he’s not back, the panic sets in. You grab your phone off of the bedside table to check the time: 2:38. 
Where the hell is he?
You sit up and search the dark room for traces of him, but there’s nothing—only his phone on the bedside table.
It’s been hours since your confrontation with Coralie, but you’re yet to process it all. You’re still in shock at the fact that she rocked up at your door the way she did, but you’d be lying if you said the conversation wasn’t cathartic. 
‘Jude?’ 
You push the covers away and climb off of the bed. After you locate your house shoes, you set out to find him. 
His phone is here, so he shouldn’t be far. 
‘Jude?’ 
As you make your trek down the short passage, you hear soft chatter coming from the TV room. When you turn the corner, you find Jude sitting on the couch, his long legs stretched out in front of him, feet resting on the coffee table. 
A smile takes over your face at the sight of him. 
‘Hey, you,’ he greets you as you crawl into his lap. 
‘Hi,’ you tuck your face in the crook of his neck and inhale his scent. ‘What are you watching?’ 
‘Pulp Fiction.’
Of course he is. 
‘Why’re you up?’ 
You trace patterns on his t-shirt clad chest. ‘I woke up and you weren’t in bed. I panicked.’
He tightens his arms around you, ‘Why?’
‘I don’t know,’ you sit up. ‘This pregnancy has me acting weird.’ 
‘Yeah, blame it on the pregnancy,’ he teases. 
‘Shut up,’ you shift to straddle him. ‘Why are you sitting here alone?’
His hands settle on your waist, ‘I didn’t want to wake you.’
There’s still so much to discuss in terms of Coralie and her claims, but tonight just isn’t the time for that.
‘Do you think we’ll ever be okay again?’ 
‘Yeah,’ he takes your mouth into a deep kiss. 
‘Come to bed with me,’ you whisper against his lips, moaning when he slips a hand between you, teasing his fingers through your slick folds. 
‘I don’t think we’ll make it to bed.’ 
///
Tagged:
@luv4bellingham
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asa-do-your-thing · 3 days
Text
Among the ferns
18+ MINORS DNI Halsin x F!Reader 2.6k Warnings: SMUT, cunnilingus, p in v sex, unprotected sex, loss of virginity, size kink, fluffy smut as always no proofreading no nothing this is for you bby :3 @foxyanon
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As the night grew colder, your companions retired to bed one by one. All except for Halsin, who had made a promise to stay up with you. He didn't mind avoiding Lae'zel's loud snoring; he preferred talking with you anyways, and sleep wasn't coming easy for him this night.
“Tav, may I ask you something?” he asked gently, looking down at you with a small smile. The full moon illuminated the small clearing in the woods where you had set up camp and a soft breeze played with the undergrowth.
The fire that had once crackled and danced with life was now reduced to glowing embers, casting a warm, orange glow on Halsin's face. His eyes twinkled with curiosity and earnest sincerity, making them as captivating as the night sky above.
"Well, Halsin," you responded, cradling your cup of warm cider between your hands. "You can ask me anything." Your tone was light, playful even. This was not the first intimate conversation you’ve had with him, nor would it be the last.
His brow furrowed slightly under his tousled locks. "It's just..." he hesitated, looking slightly unsure of how to phrase what was on his mind.
You chuckled lightly to yourself, finding his uncharacteristic shyness amusing considering that he was normally so confident and outspoken. With his muscled frame and towering height, he was often mistaken for a brute by those unacquainted with him. But you knew better than most that there was a lot more to him than met the eye.
"Why have you never spoken about your romantic partners before?" he finally asked, voice barely above a whisper. A breeze rustled through the leaves overhead, adding a symphony of soft whispers to the stillness of the night.
A hush fell over you both as you considered his question. The forest around you teemed with life – crickets chirping in the underbrush, an owl hooting in the distance – yet all sound seemed distant as you pondered your answer.
"Truthfully?" You start, shifting your gaze from the dying fire up into the night sky, blushing gently. "I suppose that is because I've never… had a romantic partner before.”
The revelation hung in the air, ungraspable as moonlight. Halsin took a moment to truly absorb your words. His head tilted slightly, the glow of curiosity was now replaced with surprise. "You mean…" he stumbled over his words, a rare occurrence for him indeed, "You've never…?" He didn't need to spell it out; his meaning was clear.
You found yourself shaking your head in confirmation, your cheeks heating up. The confession had left you feeling lighter somehow, liberated even.
"I know it's unusual," you admitted, your fingers idly tracing the edge of your cider cup. The warm ceramic felt grounding against your skin amidst the otherwise ethereal atmosphere of the night.
Halsin, still overwhelmed by the revelation, defaulted to silence as he stared at you with intense concentration, as if trying to understand an enigma. His gaze seemed to penetrate beyond your skin through to the very essence of who you were. It was a gaze that could make anyone feel seen for perhaps the first time in their life.
The silence lingered but didn't feel oppressive; instead, it held a certain comforting intimacy that carried an odd tranquillity with it. Perhaps it was due to understanding that sometimes words were superfluous and that silence spoke volumes more than any spoken language ever could.
Finally, as if breaking free from a trance, Halsin shifted his gaze away from yours and stared into the almost extinguished fire. His fingers absent-mindedly picked up a stick and prodded at the glowing coals – it seemed like he wished to say something, but held himself back out of respect.
“Halsin, I… Look, it’s not like I have no desire for… it, it’s just that no-one ever, uh… invited me for…,” you stammered out and looked at him, trying to gauge his reaction.
"I see," he finally answered, his voice just above a whisper and filled with an understanding that you hadn't expected. He looked back at you, the light from the dying fire dancing in his eyes. “Well, under any other circumstance…” he trailed off, looking at you with a softness you hadn’t seen before.
His gaze held yours as he continued, “I would have invited you for...” he paused as if searching for the right words, “a quick, intimate encounter.”
Your cheeks heated up further at his admission. The mere thought of it sent a jolt through your body, making your heart flutter.
"But," he quickly added, seeing your reaction, "given what you've revealed... I think I would be entirely satisfied sharing just an innocent cuddle." His words settled over your ears like a soothing balm, calming your anxious thoughts.
It was a simple offer — one of warmth and companionship without any expectation or pressure.
You felt a burst of adoration and gratitude for him. It was as if Halsin was offering to meet you at your pace, to hold space for you in a world that often demanded too much too soon. He understood, perhaps better than anyone else ever could.
“Halsin…” You couldn’t help the soft smile that graced your lips. The tension that had been building dissipated into the cool night air.
He smiled back at you then – not his usual mischievous grin but something far more genuine and tender.
Together, you sat in silence once more, the crackling embers providing a warm glow to your faces.
“Actually, I… uhm… wouldyouliketoteachme?”, you pressed out and immediately looked away, afraid that he would reject you.
“I mean, everyone’s asleep, you know this forest well, you are a gentle man and as far as I know you you are a very good teacher and I’ve liked you for so long and you’re good looking…,” you rambled, sure that your cheeks couldn’t heat up even more than they did in that moment.
Halsin blinked, taken aback by your sudden outburst. Then he laughed, a rich and warm sound that echoed softly in the quiet of the night. “Easy,” he said, his voice gentle yet laced with amusement, effectively cutting through your rambling. His gaze softened even further as he reached over and took your hand into his.
"Thank you for the compliments," he said, his thumb gently caressing your knuckles. His touch felt like a spark in the darkness, both startling and comforting at the same time. "And for trusting me enough to ask."
There was an earnest sincerity in his eyes that made you feel seen – really seen – for perhaps the first time in your life. It was as if he truly understood the depth of what you’d asked him. That he grasped how much courage it must have taken you to let down your walls and bare a part of yourself you’d kept hidden away for so long.
The silence that followed was pregnant with anticipation, each moment stretching on as you waited with bated breath for his response.
“Alright,” Halsin finally said, breaking the silence. His tone was somber now, filled with a level of gravity that reflected just how seriously he was taking your request.
“If this is what you want... If it’s something that feels right for you…” He paused to give you one last chance to change your mind. However, seeing no hesitation in your eyes, he simply nodded and continued, “Then yes, I’d be honored.”
A sense of relief washed over you at his words. It was as if a weight had been lifted off your chest - a wide smile spread over your cheeks and you hugged him, losing yourself in his warmth and scent.
Gently, he cradled your head against his shoulder, the rhythm of his heart a soothing lullaby as you relished in this newfound intimacy. It wasn't long before he scooped you up into his arms, rising from the bed of moss and ferns to carry you further into the forest. Your heart pounded with a mixture of anticipation and nervousness as pine needles rustled beneath his feet, creating a symphony with the nocturnal creatures singing their songs.
The forest that had seemed so intimidating before now felt like a safe sanctuary under Halsin's guidance. He deftly navigated through the complex labyrinth of towering trees, guiding you through dappled moonlight that slipped through the rustling canopy above.
Eventually, he came to halt in a hidden glade awash with soft silver light. It was an enchanting spectacle - fireflies danced in the air while a gentle brook murmured in the distance, providing a harmonious backdrop to this still moment. Here, beneath the vast expanse of stars, Halsin laid you down gently on another bed made of moss and ferns.
Halsin hesitated for just a moment before beginning to remove his clothing, piece by piece. His movements were unhurried and deliberate, affording you enough time to adjust to each new revelation of skin and muscle underneath. He was beautiful in all senses of the word – not just physically but in his vulnerability too.
Once he stood undressed before you, it was his turn to ask for permission. His voice was low as he asked, "May I?" His respect for your comfort evident in that simple question.
“Y-yes, you may,” you muttered and gasped as you felt his hands working on the laces of your dress and the feeling of his lips on the nape of your neck. “You may do anything you wish, as long as you… are gentle,” you whispered, drawing in a big breath as he bared your breasts, gently tracing his hands over the gentle curves.
"Yes," he murmured against your skin, "always gentle." His voice was a soothing rumble that reverberated through you, making your heart flutter in response. His hands were warm against your cool skin, his touch so tender and careful it nearly brought tears to your eyes.
He guided you to recline on the mossy bed, his strong hands supporting your back as you did so. The moss was surprisingly soft underneath you, nature's own cushioned bedding. Halsin continued to worship your body with his hands and mouth, his every touch sending waves of pleasure coursing through you. You gasped as he traced kisses down your neck, over the valley between your breasts, and then lower still.
You gasped and blushed at the sensation and bit your lip as you felt his big finger gently slipping between your wet folds. Gods, it felt so good, and the longer you looked at him pleasuring you through half-closed eyes, you felt your inner fire burning hotter and hotter. Everything about him drove you wild. From the way he loomed over you, to his strong, yet gentle hold on you, not to mention the way he caressed you - it drove you to the brink of insanity.
“Let go, my love… moan for me, my sweet thing… let nature hear your call…,” he muttered, alternating between rubbing your pearl, licking and kissing it gently.
Gasping, you struggled to breathe as the pleasure coursed through you like wildfire. You'd never felt anything like this, and it was all too much and not nearly enough at the same time. His touch was electric, igniting every nerve ending in your body and sending sparks of ecstasy ricocheting along your spine. Moans tumbled unbidden from your lips, mingling with the chorus of the forest around you.
"Halsin," you whimpered, arching your back off the cushiony moss beneath you. "Oh gods, Halsin... it feels... it feels..." Words failed to do justice to the sensations he evoked within you.
He chuckled against your damp core, sending a shiver cascading down your spine. "That's it, darling. Let it out. I want to hear every little sound that escapes those pretty lips of yours."
Emboldened by his words, you did just that - moaning louder as he continued his ministrations. His tongue flicked and swirled over your most sensitive spots, teasing and taunting you until you thought you might combust from the aching need building within. Every stroke of his tongue or caress of his fingers seemed to send you higher and higher still, until you were certain your heart would beat right out of your chest.
"Halsin... Halsin... I... I'm..." You panted, but could not finish your sentence, as a huge wave of pleasure crashed over you. You cried out in unadulterated bliss as your body shuddered and arched beneath his touch. Halsin continued to caress and kiss you, milking every last shudder and gasp from your body until at last, your cries subsided into satisfied pants.
“You did perfect. Now… are you ready for me? Or should I let you rest?”, he asked sweetly, pulling himself out from between your thighs and up to you.
It felt like you were dreaming - and could do nothing else but to shake your head and hold your chest, gazing wantonly up at him. “No, no rest, I… I need you, I want you, but… are you sure that it is going to fit?”
He chuckled, a low, rumbling sound that sent shivers down your spine. “Oh, my love, I've imagined this moment for so long... and I assure you, I will fit. Just…” He leaned in to replace his words with a fiery kiss, his tongue teasing yours as he gently slipped his hardness between your wet folds.
It felt like he was right - it stung for a second, but it was a perfect fit, and he filled you up completely as he entered you inch by inch, stretching you to the limit, even though he was still holding back from plunging completely into you. "Feel how perfect we fit together?", he whispered into your ear, gently kissing the top of your head.
"Y-yes," you panted, arching your hips against his. "Halsin... please... don't stop." You wrapped your legs around his waist, urging him onward.
He obliged, slowly and steadily, surging into your depths as if he had all the time in the world. The sensation was unlike anything you'd ever experienced - a delicious friction of stretching and heat that bordered on pain but was oh so exquisite. His every movement sent waves of pleasure crashing through you anew, his length hitting places inside you that had never known such stimulation before.
As he rocked his hips against yours, a primal, animalistic growl escaped his lips, and his grip on your hips tightened just enough to leave marks. You didn't mind, though - if anything, it spurred you on further. Your hands tangled in the moss beneath you, nails clawing at the ground as wave after wave of pleasure crashed over you.
"You feel so good... so tight... around me," Halsin groaned between gasps, the pace of his thrusts increasing marginally with each breathy moan that escaped your lips. "I... I've wanted this... for so long... You, bouncing under me… in the woods…"
The way he spoke to you - so guttural and raw - was enough to send you over the edge a second time. Your climax washed over you like a tidal wave, hot and consuming, leaving you reeling in its wake. "Halsin!" You cried out his name as your body clenched around him, contracting around his hardness and milking him for all he was worth.
"Gods...," he panted, his thrusts growing erratic as he too lost control. "I... I can't... much more... So tight…"
With one final, earth-shattering thrust, he stilled inside you, his essence welcomed within your depths as you both shuddered through the climax together. Halsin collapsed atop you, his breathing ragged in your ear.
"That…" He finally managed between breaths. "Was… better… than I ever imagined."
You smiled up at him, your insides still convulsing and hugged him tight, not minding that he squished you under his large, shuddering body. “You’re… you’re a good teacher. The best.”
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candylix · 8 hours
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great minds think alike | bang chan
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A sequel to blow my mind, read that one first! Pairing • Chan x GN!Reader Summary • After failing your test, you decide to go to the library to study. But when you get there, you see Chan. He wasn't the reason you failed, but he definitely didn't help. You said you weren't going to read his mind again, but after the first incident, he hasn't left your thoughts. It couldn't hurt to see what he's thinking about this time, right? Genre • college au, fluff, smut WC • 2.6k Content • sequel to blow my mind, no pronouns used but reader does have a vagina and breasts, mind reading, dirty thoughts about: asking you out 🥰, public sex, groping, thigh grinding, clit stimulation. Chan has an exhibitionism kink. Indented paragraphs indicate what's happening in his mind and not real life.
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You really needed to bring your grade up. Normally you do alright, but that score was going to plummet your GPA. You never expected cheating to backfire so hard... but how could you possibly predict that the person you were mind reading would be thinking about sex the whole time?
This time, you'll be prepared the right way. You carry your textbooks and notes to the school library, and you're going to buckle down and study.
You enter the library with your foolproof plan in mind. You even set your timer for an hour, so you know when to take a break after all your hard work. But you freeze when you get to the tables and see a certain man already there.
Chan is studying too. You can feel your heartbeat thumping in your chest. After the test, you caught yourself thinking about him all the time. When you saw him, you felt butterflies in your stomach. You wanted to be around him, but you felt too anxious to say hi.
Safe to say, you've formed a little crush on him. It was embarrassing to admit to yourself, because you know how it happened. You read his mind, saw him fuck you on the desk, and now you want to hold his hand and kiss him.
Before you can even think rationally, you find yourself walking over to his table.
"Hey, mind if I study here?" you ask, mentally punching yourself for breaking the plan this easily.
He looks up, startled by the sudden intrusion, but his shock fades into a smile when he sees you.
"Go ahead," he responds. You pull out the seat across from him and put your stuff in front of you, as if you'll actually be able to get any studying done.
"Did you see your test score yet?" he asks.
"Yeah... let's just say there's a reason I came here to study."
"I didn't do too well either. Not bad, but not good."
"What happened?" you ask. You know what happened, but you want to see what he has to say.
"I, uh," he starts, and you see his cheeks start to flush. "I got a bit distracted."
'A bit distracted' is the understatement of the century.
"I hope I don't distract you, then."
He laughs nervously at your comment.
"Well, um, I'll get back to studying then," he says, and hides his face behind his laptop.
You open your textbook and think about studying, but you know you wont be able to resist peering into his mind. With the way he reacted, you know he's going to think about something interesting.
While pretending to read the book, you focus on him, and his thoughts gradually fill your head.
'Ok, Chan, focus. You can do this. Just... read your notes... focus... it would be rude to leave, right? I'm not gonna be able to focus like this.'
There was a small part of you that thought he didn't actually have feelings for you, and that he was just a pervert. But from the way he's struggling to study because you sat at his table, you can tell he really does like you.
'Do you want to go for coffee after this? No, that's stupid, it's too late to get coffee. What about... Wanna go see a movie sometime? That's stupid too. Ugh. How do you ask someone out without being cringy? Maybe I should buy some flowers? No, I'd have to carry them around all day like an idiot. This is too hard. I should just jump into a volcano. That would be easier... But this is such a good chance. I have to say something before I miss another perfect opportunity...'
His thoughts are racing a mile a minute, trying to figure out what he's going to say to ask you out. He said something about missing another opportunity... how long has this been on his mind? You feel heat rise to your cheeks as you think of every time you talked, wondering when he was thinking of asking you out. There have been a few times where he looked like he was going to say something, but just kept quiet. Was that him chickening out? Maybe you should put him out of his misery and ask him to dinner.
You tune back into his mind, just in time for him to imagine a scenario involving you.
He's sitting in the library across from you, exactly how you are now, but he's wearing a leather jacket and sunglasses. "Hey babe, why don't you stop what you're doing and take a ride with me tonight. I'll make it worth your while." He winks, and a motorcycle comes crashing through the wall to stand next to him. He takes a seat on it, and you run up to get on behind him. He revs the engine a few times to look cool. You wrap your arms around his waist, feeling his six pack through his shirt. Then he rides the motorcycle out of the hole in the wall and into the sunset.
You can't stop a chuckle from escaping your lips.
"What are you laughing at?" he asks, cocking an eyebrow.
"Um, nothing. Just remembered something funny my friend said earlier," you lie.
You both go back to 'studying'. That was a close call. Not that he would ever guess what you're doing, but you did want to see where that fantasy was heading. You don't have to wait long before another one starts again.
You're both sitting in the library. He clears his throat, and you look up at him. "Sorry to interrupt, but... would you want to... maybe... go out with me?" he asks. "No." You say flatly. Then you take your textbook and hit him across the face, before leaving the room. 'Chan, that would never happen,' he thinks to himself. The daydream resets, and you're back where you were before, sitting across the table from him as if that never happened. He suddenly stands up, grabbing your attention, and walks over to your side of the table. He sits on your textbook, forcing you to look up at him. "We're done studying for today. I'm taking you out for dinner." "But-" "No buts. I won't take no for an answer." "I guess I have no choice then," you say, giggling. He fixates on your smile, they way you look at him, your lips... and everything freezes.
Chan buries his face in his hands. He wanted to be a cool, suave ladies man, but even in his imagination he loses his composure when you smile at him.
It's cute to see him like this, reminding you of when you read his mind during the test. The first thing he did was imagine holding your hand. It's possible that his feelings have gotten stronger since then, because now he's struggling just to ask you out in his romantic fantasies.
He's still sitting on the table in front of you, and he takes your hand, pulling you up you up to your feet. His other hand cups your cheek, and guides your face down to him. Your lips press into his, and you melt into the kiss. He breaks the kiss, and looks into your eyes. "Let's take a rain check on dinner," he says, and his hands move to the bottom of your shirt. "What are you-" you start, but he lifts your shirt up and over your head, throwing it to the side. He unclasps your bra and throws it somewhere as well, and he drinks in the sight of you. "Chan, we're in public. Someone might see us." "Good, let them. I want everyone to know these," he says, grabbing your tits, "are mine." With one hand on each breast, he massages them, and kisses you again. His thumb grazes over your nipples, and you moan into the kiss. You can feel him smile, and he pulls at your nipples while he gropes you. His hands travel down your stomach and to your waist. He's quick to unbutton your pants and pull them down. He massages your ass over your underwear, and his thigh parts your legs to rest itself under your cunt. You gasp, and he slips his tongue in, deepening the kiss. You roll your hips, rubbing your pussy on his muscular thigh. He grabs your waist to help guide you on him, and you continue grinding on his leg as the feeling in your pit starts to build. "Not so shy anymore, huh?" he teases. "You want everyone to see you humping my leg." You roll your hips against him faster, trying to feel as much as you can between multiple layers of fabric. He watches your breasts bounce as you buck against him, and he sits there mesmerized at how good you look when you're fucking yourself on him.
Your alarm goes off. You both jump in your seats. His daydream instantly vanishes as the noise brings you both back to reality. You scramble to shut it off.
"Sorry, I forgot I set that alarm." "Oh... Does that mean you're done?" he asks. He looks at you with sad puppy dog eyes.
'Shit. I was too busy being horny that I completely forgot to ask. Ugh.'
You decide that if you want to go out with him, you're going to have to ask him yourself. "Actually, I have something I wanted to ask you," you say, and he instantly perks up. Your feel your heart beating, and you hesitate for a moment. You know he'll say yes, but you still feel nervous all of a sudden. Asking someone out apparently doesn't get easier even if you have nothing to fear. Finally, you make yourself say the words.
"Do you want to go out sometime?" He pauses, and starts overthinking about what you could possibly mean. "Um... like you want to hang out? Like a friendly 'go out'?" "More like a date 'go out'."
"Oh... OH. Yes!" He coughs, trying to sound nonchalant. "Yeah, let's go out sometime."
He can't hold back the grin that forms on his face. "Actually, I was going to ask you the same thing."
"Really?" you say, feigning ignorance, "That's crazy. I didn't know you were interested in me."
"Yeah... I've liked you for a while," he says shyly, and his cheeks turn pink. God he's cute.
"In that case," you start, walking around to his side of the table and grabbing his hand, "there's something I want to do." You pull him up to his feet, and lead him to the bookshelves. You walk into an empty aisle near the back. "I really want to kiss you." His face turns bright red, and you can hear the thumping of his heartbeat. "O-ok," he stutters. He's completely different from the Casanova in his daydreams, but the juxtaposition is very endearing.
You cup his face and lean in for a kiss, and he kisses back softly. He doesn't know where to put his hands at first, but he rests them on your waist. Gently, you push him back against the bookshelves and press your body into him. He melts into the kiss, and his confidence grows enough to lower his hands to your ass.
For the first time, his thoughts are completely silent.
You're the first to break the kiss. "Do you want to go a bit further?" you ask. "Further...?" he asks, and when your hands leave his face to travel down to his hips, his eyes go wide. "What if someone walks in on us?"
"Then they'll know I'm all yours," you whisper. With the way you're pressed up against him, you can feel his erection forming. If his daydreams didn't convince you of his exhibitionism kink, this sure did.
He nods his head, and you lean back in for another kiss. You palm his crotch, and as you slowly stroke his bulge, you feel him harden under your touch. He grabs your hand, stopping it in its track. "What's wrong?" you ask. "Sorry, I just..." he hesitates for a moment, but continues, "I want to be the one touching you." You remember everything he's fantasized. That is what he likes. "Go ahead," you say. He turns you around so that your back is on his chest, and he brings his hand between your legs. He kisses your neck while he rubs you, and you lean your head back into him. His hand moves into your pants, and he feels the wet spot in your underwear. He moves it aside, and his fingers circle your clit. When he finds a spot that makes you twitch, he presses into it, rubbing it harder and faster until your body rocks into his hand. His other hand snakes under your shirt to grope your breast, and he plays with your nipple. He rubs it and pulls at it, earning a moan from you. The fingers on your clit stroke you faster, and you can hear how wet you are as he moves in and out of your folds. The sensations from your breast and your core has you bucking wildly on him, and your ass presses against his dick. He buries his face into your shoulder, dampening the moan he lets out. He grinds into you from behind, with no rhythm in his movements.
You can feel your orgasm building, and you can't control how you hump Chan's hand while he continues his brutal pace against your cunt. He works his fingers, caressing your folds and rubbing a sensitive spot. You writhe under his touch, and you know you're close. You feel the dam burst, and he continues to rub circles around your clit as you buck into his hand, riding out your high. His hand continues to hold your pussy as he humps your ass, feeling his own orgasm building. He moans, and his pace slows down as he finishes on you. You're both breathing heavily, and he takes his hand out of your pants.
You both lower yourselves to the ground in exhaustion, and you turn to face him. He leans back against the bookshelf. "You don't know how much I wanted to do that," he finally says, and you have to stop yourself from saying yes, you did know.
"Me too," you admit.
As much fun as it was peeping into his thoughts, the real thing felt way better.
"Do you... want to make plans for our date?" he asks. You completely forgot about that in the heat of the moment. "Maybe we should get cleaned up before we think about next time." "Oh, right. Do you want to come to my dorm to shower?" he asks, before adding "Just to get cleaned up! I didn't mean- unless you want to-"
"Yes," you say, answering his question before he overthinks and uninvites you. "I don't want to have to go home like this."
"Yeah, um, alright. Come with me."
You go back to the table to get your stuff, which thankfully is still there, and he leads you to his dorm.
You didn't end up studying, but you did end up with a boyfriend, and that's more important anyways.
Although he would argue otherwise.
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EPILOGUE:
You're chilling in Chan's room while you wait for your final grades to show up on the school website. You check your phone, it's finally the time they said it would be posted. You both open the website.
"Yes!" he yells, "I got a 93%!"
You wait for the page to load, and when you see your mark, you breathe a sigh of relief.
You barely passed, with 1% over the failing grade, but a pass is a pass nonetheless. Your GPA fell significantly after you started dating Chan, but it worked out in the end.
He looks at your score.
'Wow, what a terrible grade.'
He looks back at you.
"Hey, you passed! Great job!" he says, and gives you a high five.
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Note
What would your headcanons be for the 141 in nursing homes? As in old ass man.
Maybe some extra characters as well? 👀
I'm splitting this up into 3 categories: Physical appearance, personality/behaviour, and overall shenanigans.
John Price
Went bald but still has a killer mustache and a ridiculous amount of body hair and yet all the hair he has left has gone grey. Is SOOO wrinkly. His eyes are hooded/droopy beyond fucking belief.
He's 100% a "Back in my day..." old man. Has def gone half-deaf. Is both a flight risk AND a fall risk but refuses to use his walker/zimmer frame. Is the first one up in the morning, before the staff even changed shifts (consequence of early rising all his life in the military)
Insists on being called 'Captain' by the staff, gives everyone the stink eye if he gets called 'John' or 'Mr.Price'. Sometimes still wakes up dreaming of Makarov and/or Shepherd and spends all day grumpy. Staff hates him.
Simon Riley
Does not go wrinkly. Instead, his skin gets taut and he loses weight and muscle, and becomes skinny/frail. Is VERY hunched over.
Has def lost most of his hearing as well. Is impossible to talk to. A conversation between him and Price spirals from a topic to the next because they misinterpret each other's words. Blasts his fave TV shows (The Price is Right) at top volume all hours of the day.
Has dementia or some other brain degenerative disease, which means he's often lost/confused... So it's not uncommon to see him walking around carrying a cane or umbrella like it's a rifle because he thinks he's still a soldier. Has scared the shit out of night staff by sneaking up behind them with a mask on (where did he get the bloody mask?) and nearly stabbing them with a syringe-like it was one of his knives.
Johnny MacTavish
Does not make it to a nursing home, he's already dead.
Kyle Garrick
Has gone grey but not that wrinkly. Still looks surprisingly good for his age. Is very charming. Wears colourful shirts (Hawaiian and not), and has a nice style... but still wears that stupid bloody hat of his. Has VERY bad hip pain from falling out of helicopters so much.
Is SOOO sweet and polite, and charms all the old ladies AND the nursing staff, every kid that comes visit other grandparents LOVES him. Is the least annoying senior at the nursing home. Also has terrible hearing. Spends his time shouting at Price and Simon to have a conversation.
Still gets taken to veteran/war remembrance days by his family and watches the parades and such... only to look at helicopters with disdain in his eyes and curses them out with a fist.
Alejandro Vargas
Has not gone grey but is a healthy salt-and-pepper. Still keeps his little stubble OR an anchor goatee. Wears glasses now, but they're those types that transition into sunglasses.
His hearing is ALSO shot. Has very shaky hands so he keeps dropping things, especially his pills. Talks crap about everyone with Rodolfo (they gossip in Spanish so no one can hear him.) Is never grumpy. Loves playing cornhole and pétanque.
Is 100% a cougar hunter. Has a silver-tongue and is still so attractive that he just seduces ALL the old ladies. Some of them were still married to their husbands (who were ALSO in the nursing home) and he STILL flirted with them.
Rodolfo Parra
Rudy has gone chubby, wears glasses, and still stays clean-shaven. Wears cardigans and corduroy trousers. Is on a wheelchair.
Is very polite. Spends his time reading in the garden, and likes tending to flowers. Loves a good gossip with Alejandro. Loves playing cards because it's the one game Alejandro cannot play, is very smug about it.
Falls asleep suddenly after meals. Hates Philip Graves with a fucking passion. Hates him so much he still wakes up dreaming about the betrayal in 2022 and gets MAD about it. Wheels himself to Alejandro's room every time and complains. "Pendejo de mierda, Graves."
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flowersandbigteeth · 3 days
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I think I need a part 2 of the baby creatures because its absolutely ADORABLE!! What about driders, centaurs, orcs, and merfolk?
Thinking about monster babies is so soothing ^_^
The first one is here
👇🏽
Merfolk are born with little tails that take time to gain the strength needed to get them around, so their parents mostly carry them as infants. They are born with an extra fat layer, making them extra chubby, but also to keep them warm in the deep ocean. When they are old enough to swim on their own, most baby merfolk prefer to swim around in a school so they can play and for safety. They have an inherent understanding of the vastness of the ocean and prefer to play near their parents. While they are young, their parents prefer to keep them away from the shallows as there is danger of being spotted by a human or reef shark. Instead, they prefer to keep them in caves, floating kelp, or high sea grass where they can hide easily.
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Centaur babies, like humans, take time to develop. Though their bodies are capable of carrying weight when they are born, their brains aren't developed enough to put two and two together, so they are carried for the first six months of their lives. For the first few months, they tend to stay in the fetal position, snuggling in nests or on their parent's back, until their vision and core strength develop. However, once they are on their four feet, they are tiny menaces. They have all the energy and good sense (none) of a toddler but with four strong legs to carry them where they want to go. It's the job of the entire herd to keep them out of trouble. They are easily startled and will retreat to a nearby adult if scared, but they love physical activity. Since they take so well to athletics, centaurs start training their toddlers as soon as they can walk to keep them occupied. Their first training is usually small gathering expeditions, where a few centaurs will escort all of the children to the forest to learn what mushrooms, berries, and nuts are edible. That's followed by runs that grow increasingly longer to learn scouting and camouflage techniques so that they can take their turn on patrol when they are old enough.
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Driders are born with their eyes closed and a soft carapace. Their parents generally keep them in a web nursery while their skin hardens, and they eventually open their eyes. Young driderlings are precocious and curious, driven by their natural hunting instincts to explore. When they are small, they can't yet weave or chew through their parent's webs, but they enjoy observing whatever their parents happen to be doing. They are even happier if they are allowed to help. It takes them a bit to obtain the grace and stealthiness normally associated with Driders. When they are little, they are very clumsy and need help from their parents to figure out which leg goes where. They come of the age to be relatively independent when they are able to escape their nurseries, meaning their teeth and claws have developed as well as spinnerets to help them get wherever they want to go. They are astute students when it comes to weaving, writing, and hunting, with a natural lean towards perfectionism. When they are older, they tend to be more solitary. While they enjoy drider society, they are driven to create safe spaces within it for themselves and can be alone for long periods of time without a problem.
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Orc babies are expressive and needy. They crave physical touch and interaction to keep them engaged or they get bored and naughty. They need lots of toys to develop their motor skills and learn to crawl earlier than human babies from their excitement to follow their parents around. They hate being in their cradle unless they are asleep and prefer to be in the same room with their parents while they work. They take well to other Orcs in their family, excited to meet new people. Orc society is cooperative, so they learn at a young age to depend on others and seek out company. In a well-guarded Orc village, little Orcs are allowed to roam around as they please as soon after they learn to walk because the village works together to keep them safe. Older siblings or cousins feel a responsibility to keep an eye on the little ones, and often, young Orcs will form little packs to run around the village collecting cookies from indulgent mothers and grandmothers. Little Orcs enjoy crafts, group games, and getting into mischief together. Orc parents encourage them to play independently, developing relationships that will become more and more important as they grow.
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Bluesky -- Carrd -- Commissions -- Instagram -- Threads -- Subscribestar
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sl0t4matt · 23 hours
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Marc Guiu and reader making up after an argument pls
m. guiu | into it
ik hector doesn’t have his license yet but here he does ok?! also sorry i got carried away and wrote smut :o
warnings: toxic relationship, smut, not proof read
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“are you actually fucking kidding me, marc?” you scoff, grabbing your things ready to leave. you were sick of his shit. sick of him taking his anger out on you when you did nothing but support and be there for him. how could be so mean? you understand that him loosing a game would get him upset, but making it seem like it’s your fault, when he should’ve been the one to kick the ball in the net is just not fair.
“yeah run away, like you always do when it gets tough.” he walks after you, shrugging his shoulders. “marc, don’t you take your shit out on me, because the both of us know it’s literally not on me you can’t kick a ball.” you shake your head, clearly having enough of your boyfriends whining. “fuck you can be such a-.” he stops himself before saying something stupid. “yeah, no we’re done. don’t even try to call me because i won’t come back. i mean it this time.”
you walk out the house, catching marc’s sister on the way. “hey, what happened, i heard yelling, are you guys okay?” she gives you an concerned look, probably noticing the tears that have been building up in the corner of your eyes.
before you completely break down in front of her, you decide to give her a nod, before leaving. you couldn’t believe marc. he has gotten mad about his team losing many times, but it has never been this bad. sure you would fight, it’s just something that was part of your relationship, but maybe that isn’t so normal after all.
you were both toxic playing stupid games with each other like how to make the other jealous. you loved it, the fights, the trouble. it’s what kept your relationship entertaining, but now you weren’t so sure anymore.
just fucking great! now you have to walk home. you go to walk on the other side of the street, when you suddenly hear a honk, making you jump. you turn to see hectors car stopping beside you. “shit, you scared me! what the hell are you doing here.” you sigh, shaking your head. “came to take you home.” he answers. “i’m f-.” “just get in the damn car, y/n.” hector interrupts you. you roll your eyes, walking to the passenger seat.
you wouldn’t have needed him to drive you if it wasn’t so dark out. “did marc tell you to drive me?” you ask, looking over at him. he doesn’t reply, instead he keeps looking at the road not giving a reaction, so you must take his silence as an answer. “what happened?” you can’t help but scoff. “as if marc didn’t tell you already.” he shakes his head. “he didn’t. he just told me he fucked up again and that i should pick you up.”
“we’ll at least he knows he did.” you breathe out a laugh. “seriously, what happened?” he repeats. “he’s just bitching about the lose of the game and literally behaves like a child, acting like it’s my fault. he also almost called me a bitch… so told him we’re done.” hectors eyes widen, looking like they are about to pop out. “wait what? you broke up with him, like for real this time.”
you giggle, nodding. “i’m just done with all the fights, you know.” you look out the window watching the peaceful road, with almost no cars to be seen. “but you guys love it.” he furrows. “i’m just tired lf it, you know?” he nods. “that’s fair, he’s dumb for treating you like that.” hector says, before shutting the motor down, because you arrived home. “what are you doing right now?” you ask hector, since you guys haven’t talked much previously. “nothing, why?” you smirk. “you have to stay with me! we haven’t had our gossip sessions in so long.” you nudge him. “yeah, if that makes you feel better.” he smiles shrugging. “definitely. god, there’s so much tea!!” you walk over to your house
“i still love him, even if he does stupid shit like that you know.” you tell hector, while stuffing the chips in your mouth. you would probably die if anyone saw you like this, but it’s only hector, he’s seen you your worst times. even though he’s marc’s best friend, he never told him anything when you would talk about him. that’s why you can talk so openly with him about anything, he just won’t tell anyone. “then why don’t you get back with him?” hector asks. a knock on the door cuts in your conversation. “y/n?” you hear marc’s voice, making hectors mouth drop in a gasp.
shit, this looks so wrong right now, with hector laying in your bed as well as yourself. you walk over to the door, opening it a tiny bit to see his sad looking face. he genuinely looks like he’s sorry. you look back to hector that sits dumbfound in your bed. “who’s in there?” marc asks. you shake your head. “no one.” you answer way too quick. he pushes open your door, revealing hector that is sat on your bed. you look him in the eyes to see an hint of reaction, but he doesn’t show any.
“why is he here?” marc asks, way too calm, it’s almost scaring you. “we just talked.” you say your eyes meeting with the ground, mentally preparing yourself for the yelling. “okay.” he just nods. you look up at him, a furrow on your face. have you heard that right? “can i talk to you..alone?” marc scratches the back of his head, nervously. you nod following him out.
“did you fuck him?” woah straight to it marc! also what the fuck? “what the fuck, no!” you exclaim. “okay.” he nods. “marc, can you explain yourself other than replying with an “okay”. why are you here?” he just keeps head low. he almost looks like.. he’s intimidated by you.
“i wanted to apologise.” he finally looks at you. suddenly hector comes out of your room. he points to the door awkwardly, mentioning he’s gonna leave. you give him a smile before looking back at marc.
“marc..” you start. “no please, don’t say anything, just hear me out. i shouldn’t have talked to you the way that i did. it was stupid of me to take everything out on you, because you’re the best thing that has ever happened to me and i would never want you to feel guilty of something that i did. i understand that you probably never wanna talk to me again, but i just need to make sure that despite what i said, you know that i love you.” something in the way he’s saying it makes you believe him, but you’re not sure if you can forgive him so soon.
but fuck, he has no right to look this good right now, you’re supposed to be mad at him! his lips plump and red from the way he’s been biting on them nervously, his biceps broad and strong as he crosses his arms and his eyes looking lowly down on you. how can you be mad at him, when he looks like that? “you’re on probation, i guess.” marc’s eyes light up. “what’s that supposed to mean? please. are you ever going to forgive me?” he asks, needing to know. “like i said, you’re on probation.” you reply, getting closer to him. “that isn’t a yes, y/n. do i need to get on my knees and beg for you?” you can’t help but smirk. “getting on your knees wouldn’t be such a bad idea, actually.”
“fucking hell, well we can always make that happen, ma.” his hand makes its way to your waist, pulling you onto him. in a matter of seconds his lips are on your’s. he tightens his hands on your waist and runs the other up your back, pressing you harder into his chest. your hands move in his hair, pulling him closer, if that’s even possible. he parts your lips with his tongue, to deepen the kiss. his hand on your waist loosens and trails down the side of your body, until he turns it to grab your ass. he lets out a low groan, bringing his other hand also down on your ass. you pull on his bottom lip slightly, making him smile in the kiss before reconnecting them again.
he squeezes your butt, muttering a quick “jump.” before picking you up and carrying you to your bed. he sits down, your legs each spread as you straddle him. he grips your hips, moving them back and forth so you’ll grind on him.
he groans as you feel his dick twitching under your cunt. he unbuttons his pants, making you slide your hand in them to feel his hard and veiny dick. you always forget how big he is.
he groans, taking your hand out of his boxers. “i want to make you feel good.” can he get any hotter? you smile at him, while dropping beside him on the bed. he lifts your arms before taking off your top and throwing it on the ground. he begins sucking and kissing your neck, most likely in order to cause hicky’s so everyone knows who you belong to, but it feels too good right now, to care about. his hand slides down to your loose pyjama shorts, touching your clit. you let out a whimper. you forgot how well he knew what you liked. “you look so good, ma.” he now kisses your tits also sucking on them like a newborn.
his mouth moves back on your’s, when he slides his cold fingers into your shorts, forming goosebumps on your skin. he immediately finds your hole pushing his fingers inside of you without an warning. he keeps stretching your walls, causing you to moan in his mouth. you part your mouth in the kiss, marc taking the opportunity to bite on your button lip, tasting your cherry flavoured lipgloss. he plumps his fingers in and out of you, whispering sweet words in your ear, in order to show his love for you.
his mouth moves from your face, down to your body, where you need him the most. he starts eating you out like his live depends on it licking and sucking in all your juices. you push his head deeper in your cunt, needing to feel him deeper. “marc i need your dick, please.” you moan. he looks up to you, eyes glistening, having waited for you to say that. as soon as the words left your mouth, he instantly turns you around, having your face meet with the pillow. he pulls your pants down, following with his own. you turn your head to watch him pull out his dick. lord, you’re not sure if you’re ever going to get used to his size.
he stretches your cunt as he slides into you, having you bite in the pillow in order to not let embarrassing sounds out of you. he fills you up moving, his dick in and out of you. your eyes almost fall to the back of your head, from rolling them as he fucks into you relentlessly. “fuck, so tight, ma.” he groans. you move your ass up, for yourself to feel him deeper, according to the fact he isn’t fully in you yet. “fuck, y/n. if you do that one more time i’m gonna come.” he curses.
he buries his dick deeper inside of you, his balls hitting your butt, making you whine of pleasure. he spanks your ass, fastening his peace. “marc!” you cry, as you feel him hitting your g spot. he moves rapidly, squeezing your waist. your legs begin shaking, signalling marc that, you’re gonna come. “do it.” he demands. with a cry, you cum around his cock, making him twist inside of you and pull out, coming on your belly.
he breathes heavily, his sweaty chest rising and falling with each breathe he takes. “fuck.” he mutters before getting up to take a towel from your bathroom. you look on your cum covered stomach, then back at marc that’s coming back with the towel. he smiles slightly, as he wipes it all off of you. “how are you?” he goes to lay beside you, his arms naturally finding their way to your waist, hugging you. “for a person that won’t be able to walk for the next hours, i’m doing great actually.” he laughs, pecking your shoulder.
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clotpolesonly · 3 days
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thinking about Declan and the moth again
it HAUNTS ME that the moth is one of the few times that Declan seems to lose his self-awareness completely. like, yeah, he's the ultimate king of repression, but he's usually very conscious of what he's repressing and the fact that he's repressing it. he knows his issues.
he knows that he forces down his emotions in an unhealthy way so that he can be the adult in the room at far too young an age. he knows he can't form healthy relationships because of a lifetime of danger and insecurity. he knows he dehumanized his mother as a means to cope with their batshit family situation. he knows he's competing with his father's ghost for a place in Ronan's life. he knows he resents Matthew for being the primary factor in his parentification and loss of opportunity in life. he knows he loves his father no matter how much he tries to convince himself to hate him. he knows he feels trapped in the life he's leading, doesn't see a way out, and likely wouldn't take it if he did because it would be at the expense of his brothers.
all of these things, Declan acknowledges openly, either to himself in narration or out loud to others. he may delude himself about how well he's coping with his issues, but he has no illusions about what his issues ARE.
except for the fucking moth.
it's such a perfect, on-the-nose symbol that it almost strains credulity for Declan not to acknowledge it as such, and yet not once does he ever look at the moth and feel the way he did about the black string art exhibit that made him recognize how trapped he felt in his life. "how the moth had beaten against the walls for those first few days, until it had learned it could not escape."
the learned helplessness of it - there's no point fighting to get free, just lie down and accept that this is your life. know what you're allowed to do, and have, and be. know what you're not. a creature of his father's making, confined by his father's hand.
and not even something as eye-catching as a butterfly, no, but a quieter subtler moth with eyes like glittering purple-black marbles that will never get to live a life because Niall made it so.
and the symbolic parallel of the display case and the townhouse. the rigid real world structures that Declan himself requested, because they made him feel more secure than being surrounded by dreams, and that his father provided in a well-meaning but ultimately short-sighted attempt to accommodate him. things that Declan only recognizes much later as the cages that they were.
Declan now regrets demanding his dad make the display case by hand, and when he puts himself through Ronan's bad-feeling security system at the end of the series, the memory it hits him with is inheriting the sterile alexandria townhouse that was exactly what he'd claimed to want.
these are symbols of Declan's complicity, in a manner of speaking, in the whole tragic mess that was his upbringing. at some point, quite early on, Declan's oppression became a joint effort, something that he participated in (because a complete lack of control in the situation would have felt worse). it reminds me of Declan struggling to remember which of them first decided to lie to Matthew about what he was, whether that was his dad's idea or if he'd done that of his own volition, just following pattern.
did dad trap him, or did he build the walls himself? or was it both?
but, for once, none of this is acknowledged by Declan in the text. this artistically-minded chronic overthinker carries the moth around with him - one of the two dreams he will never sell, alongside the gift from Ronan - and he stays so uncritically sentimental about it that he releases it on his wedding day with happy/nostalgic tears in his eyes, and it just boggles my mind.
this is the man who looked at a bunch of string and had the immediate revelation that he was utterly miserable and trapped in a spiderweb of a life precariously balanced on a knife's edge where one wrong move could get him and everyone he loved killed, but he looks at a direct, uncomplicated, one-to-one representation of himself and somehow does not recognize that it is not something to think of fondly. that, yes, it may be a symbol of his father's love for him, but it's not good.
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thisblogisaboutabook · 14 hours
Text
Wicked Felina (The Girl That I Love)
Part 3 - Vampire
Azriel x Reader/Rhysand’s Sister - Angst
Elain and Azriel have a moment while Tamlin and Felina reconnect. Rhys winnows his sister away following a panic attack, leaving Azriel and Tamlin to face each other one-on-one. After poor decisions are made, Azriel must answer to his High Lady. If only Feyre realized how much danger she’s in.
Part 2 Series Masterlist
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Warnings: blood, violence, self-loathing, panic attack resulting from past heartbreak and trauma, language
To Azriel, it felt like an eternity. An eternity of standing there watching his mate in the arms of a male he despised, reviled. And Felina, she looked like she was home. Like she’d just found solace after centuries of wandering alone and weary.
And fuck, it made him a bastard but it gutted him. He wanted, no, needed, to scoop her right out of his arms and carry her to a place where it was just him and her. They had so much to address. All they’d done was fed and fucked after Azriel had been turned, he thought there’d be plenty of time for talking once the bloodlust and mating frenzy settled but then everything had gone to shit.
He was so happy to have this female he adored back in his life - but to him, she was so new and he didn’t know how to feel. Because when he looked into those eyes, he still saw that swirling darkness. Not the dancing of stars he’d once adored when they were young but, the darkness of being trapped, locked away, tormented by those who should have been trustworthy. A darkness he could recognize all too well.
Where had she been all those years?
A gentle hand landed on his shoulder, pulling him from his thoughts. He looked to find the brown doe-eyes of Elain, looking to him with concern - guilt.
“Can we talk for a moment?” She whispered.
Azriel felt the muscles of his jaw tighten. The thought of leaving Felina with Tamlin made him sick.
“Not now, Elain.” He grit a bit more harshly than intended. Her eyes cast downward and he saw the hurt flicker across her soft features.
Gods, looking at her now, he didn’t know how he’d ever thought the cauldron made a mistake. She was lovely, a kind soul, she was good.
But his mate - she was wild, curious about the world around her, stars eternal. At least, she had been in her youth. Somehow being turned only amplified her into a force that had yet to be reckoned with, dark and mysterious. She was fucking everything.
She started to turn away and the guilt struck Azriel. His words of “this was a mistake.” on that cursed solstice weighing heavily between them. He could give her a moment of his time.
So, he followed her. “Elain, wait.” He spoke softly, his long strides effortlessly catching him up to her. “Let’s speak over there.” Nodding his head toward a bistro set that was far enough away from the foyer for privacy, but close enough that he could monitor.
The Shadowsinger pivoted away from the situation just long enough that he missed Felina turning her head to search for him, just to see him walking away with the delicate female.
Elain seated herself at the small table, rays of sunlight shone through the window, casting a golden hue upon her hair, rendering the middle Archeron sister nearly blonde. Her leg bounced with anxiety as Azriel took a seat across from her, sending up his shadows to block the rays.
“I-“ Elain started. “Azriel, I am so sorry. This is my fault. Lucien and I have been writing, we’ve been trying to get to know eachother. I mentioned to him about the reunion between Rhys and his sister.”
Azriel pressed his lips into a line, shuffling through his thoughts and treading carefully. “It’s fine-“
“No,” she interjected. “It’s not. I only told him because I’d had a vision of blood, shadow, and night. It alarmed me but… nobody listens to me, Azriel. They don’t understand my visions, I- I don’t either. But Lucien, he listens. He tries to help. So when she showed up, and when we realized that she- and you- were turned, I realized what the vision meant. So I told him.”
Her glassy eyes looked to him. “I had no idea about Tamlin. And I think, I think I understand why Lucien told him. He knew, about the history between she and Tamlin. But I had never mentioned all that you were going through, that she’s your mate and that there are still so many unanswered questions. I’m SO sorry.”
Azriel shook his head. How could she have known? Azriel was the gods-damned spymaster, he’d always cared for Felina and made a point to look after her, and he’d never known. He had seen a note from “Peter” once but just assumed it was some crush she’d made in Velaris. How had he never thought to look further into who she was seeing?
He knew the answer though. He always had. It was the same reason he’d never looked into Lucien’s whereabouts, or Graysen’s.
But he wasn’t ready to face that right now. The jealousy he’d harbored in those days and the well of emotions and complicated histories that it would bring to light.
So, he took a steadying breath and softened his gaze as he met her wide eyes. “Elain, it’s okay. None of us knew about their history and,” he reached a scarred hand out to brush her arm, a friendly act of reassurance. “I’m happy that Lucien is helping. Your visions are worth listening to, your voice is worth hearing.”
Elain gave a smile that didn’t meet her eyes, he could see the guilt there. And while Azriel was certainly not thrilled to see Tamlin there, he harbored no ill-will toward Elain, or Lucien for that matter, for Tamlin’s appearance today.
A sharp cry pierced the air as Felina pulled herself away from Tamlin. And Azriel almost, almost, felt a twinge of empathy for the male at the look of pain crossing his features.
“No, no, no.” Felina whimpered covering her ears, tears falling from her eyes. Azriel was on his feet in a moment, winnowing to her side as her breathing increased, pulling her in close - Felina opened her eyes, glistening with tears, and Azriel felt an intense jolt of heartbreak tug on their bond.
“I remember.” She choked out, pushing away from his embrace. She looked so small in that moment, so broken. Azriel placed a palm to his chest, as if physically feeling the pain barreling down the bond. “What is it, Felina?”
“I- I don’t. I’m sorry. I can’t-” she cried, her voice barely audible. But her next word came out clear, “Rhys?” Her brother looked to her with such sympathy, such tenderness. “What is it little star?” He asked, stepping to her side, shrouding the two of them in darkness. Azriel’s shadows whispered in his ear.
“Sad.”
“Hurt.”
“Mate.”
He couldn’t make out what was said but one moment Rhys had her in his arms, and the next, they were gone.
Rage filled Azriel as his mate vanished. Fixing his icy gaze toward a downcast Tamlin, his shadows whirled, promising violence. Elain hurried out the front door leaving just the two males. And Azriel was going to kill him.
In an instant, Azriel tackled Tamlin, fists brutally making impact with his face. “What did you do to her!?” He roared, pain filling him. Tamlin didn’t make any effort to hit Azriel, only turning his head and freeing an arm from beneath the Shadowsinger’s weight to block what he could.
Azriel was going to make this brutal, ensure Tamlin felt every ounce of pain the past centuries had brought upon them. “Nothing!” Tamlin choked out, blood filling his mouth. “I did nothing. I swear.”
“No.” Azriel spoke, landing a fist to Tamlin’s cheek. “Nothing is what you did while Feyre was fighting for her life, for Prythian, under the mountain. Nothing is what you did when your family tried to kill my mate- and her mother.” Another blow landed, this time cracking Tamlin’s nose, the metallic tang of blood filling the air. “Nothing,” Azriel spat. “Is what you are.”
It was then that Tamlin went still. All attempts of defense dropping as the words echoed through the room.
“Fight! You fucking coward!” Azriel shoved at his chest.
Tamlin turned his head to the side, vacantly staring off to the other end of the room, eyes going vacant as the weight of Azriel’s words settled within him. “You’re right.” Tamlin whispered. “I am nothing.”
The sound of Tamlin’s ragged breaths and Azriel’s heavy gasps filled the space. More blood trickled down the Spring Court High Lord’s face. “I am nothing and she is everything.” Tears lined the males eyes. “But I didn’t say anything, today. She she looked to see you walking away, she saw you with the Archeron sister, watched you caress her arm, and then she crumpled.”
Azriel gaped, his heart shattering. He was the one who’d caused her pain? Azriel let out an enraged roar, so low and loud that it rattled the windows. At that moment, the front door flew open. Feyre and Lucien entered the foyer, taking in the sight before them. The blood running down Tamlin’s face, dripping onto his tunic and splattering on the floor; Azriel’s disheveled state, his shadows snaking around him angrily, the blood coating his knuckles.
“What did you do?” Lucien ground out, stepping in Azriel’s direction.
Elain stood outside the doorway holding Nyx, excusing herself to remove the winged babe from the confrontation.
“What did HE do?” Feyre scoffed. “He’s not the one intruding in our home.”
Lucien only gave her a side-eye, swallowing whatever smart retort he had at the ready. “What. Happened?” the youngest Vanserra’s russet eye bounced back and forth between the two, the golden one whirring with each motion.
Tamlin and Azriel both stood there, like petulant children before a reprimanding father, neither speaking.
Finally, Tamlin broke the silence. “It was my fault. I’m leaving.” Azriel didn’t miss the sadness in his eyes as he looked to Lucien and Feyre and left.
“Tam, wait.” Lucien called out, but he’d already winnowed away.
Feyre looked to Azriel with a frown. “Given the state of Tamlin’s nose and your fist, something tells me this wasn’t just Tamlin’s fault. What the hell happened, Azriel?”
“I’d like to know the same.” Lucien chided, tanned arms crossing over his chest. Azriel’s hazel eyes narrowed in his direction. “You don’t need to know anything else, considering you can’t keep your mouth shut, Vanserra. You’re the reason he showed up in the first place.”
Lucien gaped, a rare show of the clever fox being caught off guard, before muttering “Shit.” He looked to the blood splattered floor, shaking his head. “I need to go find him.”
With that, he was out the door. Azriel let out a sigh, looking toward the stairwell as if Felina were up in their shared chamber and not wherever the hell Rhys had winnowed her to.
Feyre, ever the High Lady, held her head high, waiting for her spymaster to explain himself. “I need to get some air.” He muttered, making to move past her. “Oh no, you don’t.” Her hand grasped his shoulder, bringing him to a halt. “We are not finished here.”
And damn it, if she wasn’t the one person who could get him to listen right now. Rhys was one thing. Azriel could toe the line with him, test boundaries, display that icy rage that so often flowed through his veins.
But Feyre, he had no doubt that she could handle his rage as well but she was different. She had given everything for Prythian, even when she had absolutely no reason to give a damn about the fae. She was a good and just ruler. Not that Rhys wasn’t, but five-hundred years of brotherhood would jade anyone’s view, if only slightly.
So, Azriel stayed, hazel gaze fixing upon his High Lady, awaiting her next command. “Can we talk?” She asked gently, moving her tattooed hand down his arm. Azriel only nodded as she led him to the sitting room.
Situating herself on a tufted arm chair, Feyre smoothed her paint splattered dress, patiently waiting for Azriel to take his seat in the adjacent loveseat. “Elain came to find me at the studio, asking to reach out to get Lucien. She said Tamlin had shown up unannounced at the River House, that you two had talked, and something happened with Tamlin that upset Felina. Is that correct?”
Azriel nodded. It was mostly true. Was there really need to go into detail?
Feyre’s brow furrowed. “Look at me, Azriel.”
He flicked his hazel eyes to her briefly before looking back toward the entry. “You’re not telling me everything. It doesn’t take my daemati ability to see that, Az.” Her words held firm but her gaze gentle.
Emotions warred within Azriel. He didn’t want to talk to Feyre about this, about the way his heart clenches at the thought of losing Y/N - Felina - the name leaving a bitter taste in his mouth, knowing now where it originated from. At the same time, it was a support for her, a name that she held onto when nothing else made sense. He was a selfish bastard for resenting it.
However, he refused to feel selfish for the anger he felt toward Tamlin. He drew the line there. If she needed a friend, Azriel would be the first to offer that. If she needed Tamlin’s friendship, if somehow his presence were to aid in her healing? He’d swallow his pride and live with it.
He could support her, and her healing, while internally resenting Tamlin. For now it was the best he could do.
He knew he couldn’t lose control like he did this afternoon again. He’d likely have to make amends for that.
Consumed by thoughts he dropped his face into both hands, rubbing his eyes before leaning his head onto the backrest, arms crossing over his chest. Letting out a sigh of exhaustion. He couldn’t remember the last time he rested properly. Thank the gods for the unique design of this seat with indentions to accommodate Illyrian wings. The perfect spot for brooding comfortably.
A slight discomfort, however, began to set the Shadowsinger on edge. His body growing rigid.
“Hello?” Feyre’s voice invaded his mind, reminding him he still wasn’t alone.
“You’re rather persistent, High Lady.” he replied through the mental channel, that ache growing a bit stronger.
A soft laugh echoed. “Yes. Now tell me what happened.”
Azriel sent images to her, of Felina’s upset, Rhys winnowing her away, his own embarrassing outburst, the cruel words he’d spoken, the realization that he was the reason for her hurt and not Tamlin.
“That’s a lot to unpack. Speaking to you as High Lady, how you treated Tamlin was unacceptable - but, I know you are aware. From a political perspective, we should issue a formal apology at the very least. As a friend, however, you have been through a lot in a very short period of time and have so much to process. With such unusual circumstances and how new your accepted bond is - I cannot fault you for protecting her. We know so little about Vampyr bonds but I’m certain that also played a role.”
Azriel’s cheeks burned with shame. “Do you know where they went?”
His breathing increased, a metallic tang settling into his nose, seeping to his very bones.
A pause. “I do. She is safe but she needs to be with Rhys right now. Honestly, I think they both need it. He’s been on edge since she arrived.”
Azriel let out a huff, sitting upright and ending the mental connection to speak aloud. “I can understand that.”
Was the air in the house growing warmer or was that the increase in his pulse?
Sympathy flickered in those blue-gray eyes as Feyre reached out, placing a hand on Azriel’s knee. “I can’t imagine what this must feel like, Azriel, and I won’t pretend to, but things will work out in time. Perhaps the Mother knew what she was doing when she put someone with - today’s incident aside - such patience, when that is exactly what Y/N needs. What is it Amren used to tell Cassian about Nesta?” Feyre’s brows drew downward as she tried to remember.
Azriel’s restless state rendering him impatient as she searched for the words, he blurted out Amren’s saying, “Keep reaching out your hand.”
And fuck - he looked at his own hand now remembering the dried blood coating it, the blood that had filled his nostrils, when he rubbed his face.
Hunger. This was hunger. Oh gods-
His sharpened canines flashed as he looked to his High Lady, “Feyre-“
Her pulse fluttered deliciously.
Feyre’s eyes widened with realization. “Oh fuck.” She whispered, standing and stepping back from him. “Hold on, Az. It’s okay. It’s okay. We’re okay.”
And then he lunged.
———————————
Rhys sat in silence as his sister sobbed into his chest. He’d winnowed them directly to the cabin - the one that seemed at this point everyone used to avoid their own mate at some point or another.
Visions of past solstices danced in his mind. How she would sit and watch until her cheeks turned frigid. Cassian would tease her, telling her that any male that wanted to win her heart would have to take them all on in a snowball fight and come out alive. Rhys would chuckle and Az would wrap his scarf around her, or blow on her hands to warm them. He’d always cared for her. Rhys had thought in a brotherly sort of way, he knew for a fact that was how Azriel intended it, but now- he imagined it was the mating bond buried deep down, likely just starting to spark. He didn’t know whether to smile or cringe at that.
He’d become so lost in thought, holding his sister and running fingers through her raven locks that he hadn’t noticed her shutters slow down, her breathing evening out. “It looks different.” She whispered, shocking herself with the statement. “I remember this place. I think. It’s familiar, but not.”
Rhys smiled. “Well, that, my dear sister, would be because Amren and Morrigan went head to head and reduced the place to rubble a century or so ago. I rebuilt it the best that I could but made some changes - the tubs even accommodate Illyrian wings now. And Feyre darling, she added her own touches to the place.”
“Interesting…” she whispered. “I think our father would have keeled over had he seen that.”
Rhys rolled his eyes. “You’re not wrong. Our father never was the type to appreciate the arts, though he did enjoy your love of it. Not enough to let you paint the walls of any of our homes but- enough to take you to the theater whenever he could, enough to ensure the Rainbow was well-funded and thriving.”
Smiling sadly, he continued, “When I first saw the paintings here, I thought of you. How if you’d have been here, you would have been right there with her, painting along.”
Felina looked to her brother, trying so desperately to remember her old self. Who she’d once been.
“I never forgot you, sister. I’ve carried you in my heart every day, there was not a sunset that I didn’t think about the way your eyes shone with wonder as the stars appeared, about the nights you’d beg me to fly with you….wishing I’d have been there more often, wishing I’d said yes every time you asked.”
“Our past does not define us. What we do with today does.” She whispered, puzzling at her own statement. Rhys whipped his head toward her. “You remember more than you realize.”
She thought on her words. “Azriel. He used to say that, yes?”
Yes. Rhys nodded grimly, remembering the treatment his brother received as a child. “Do you remember what else he would tell you?”
“I don’t think I do.”
Rhys wrapped his arm around her shoulder, holding her closely.
“It’s the courage to continue that counts.”
Felina’s hands shook and Rhys gave them a squeeze. She whispered to herself “I am Y/N.” Her given name felt less foreign than she’d expected. “I am courageous. I will not be afraid.”
Rhys’ eyes glazed over, his posture going rigid. The grip of his hand squeezing more tightly onto his sister’s cold hand.
Suddenly she was brought into Rhys’ mind, Feyre’s voice frantic.
“It’s Azriel. He needs Felina. NOW.”
——————————————
A/n: If you read this chapter and think “Wow, Felina is being pretty dramatic over Elain” Please hold. There’s more to it that will be unpacked later - she has been through a lot and is still harboring centuries old feelings/emotions that feel recent to her as her memory slowly comes back.
Tags:
General ACOTAR tag: @lilah-asteria
Series tags: @glittervame @julesofvolterra @saltedcoffeescotch @candyjaypoppins @st4r-girl-official @nocasdatsgay @gxdsmonsters
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illdowhatiwantthanks · 15 hours
Text
The Kidney Bean & The Grape (The Surprise, Part 3)
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Emily Prentiss x fem!reader Warnings: emetophobia (nothing graphic, but characters discuss morning sickness), mostly fluff, established relationship, pregnancy times, some explicit language Word Count: 2.2k
Summary: Weeks 8 & 9 of your pregnancy are underway. Morning sickness has hit you like a freight train and you're feeling sick and gross and weak. Thankfully, Emily is always there by your side.
Week 8: The Kidney Bean
You slumped into the wall next to the toilet, shaking, a thin coating of sweat covering your face. You were so tired, so tired, of throwing up. You’d read that not all pregnant people experienced morning sickness, and that not all of the ones who did puked, and not all the ones who puked did so on a daily basis. You sent a silent fuck you into the ether to all those people.
Emily crept into the bathroom, a cup of ice chips and your favorite tiny spoon in hand. “Oh, honey,” she said, looking at you with the most pitiful, helpless expression you’d ever seen. Your hunched, exhausted body broke her heart.
You groaned and leaned your head against the tiled wall, trying to breathe steadily as waves of nausea coursed through you.
Emily grabbed a washrag from under the sink, running it under the faucet and squeezing out the excess. She folded it carefully, then sat down on the floor next to you, placing the cool rag gently on the back of your neck. She played with the messy strands of hair at your nape as she held the washrag in place.
“You think you can manage some ice chips?” she asked quietly. You thought for a moment before nodding.
You sat up and reached to grab the cup from her, your hand grazing one of your breasts. A searing, rhythmic pain shot through your body, and you doubled over, clutching your chest.
“Ow! Fuck!” you yelled, bursting immediately and uncontrollably into tears. Pain and nausea and hormones coursed through you like tributaries of some awful, body-wide river. Yet another thing you hated about being pregnant.
“What!? What happened!? Are you okay!?” Emily asked, scanning your body for harm.
You leaned into her, and she wrapped her arms protectively around your shaking body. You could count on one hand the number of times in your adult life that you’d full-on sobbed–until the last two weeks. Now you’d need at least four or five hands.
“I–” you gasped, gulping in great breaths of air as tears streamed down your face. “I hit my boob when I reached for the ice!” It would be funny if you weren’t so pitiful, if you hadn’t been nauseated and in pain for eight days straight now. The knowledge that it could and likely would last for months made you physically ill.
Emily shushed you and held your face to her chest as you cried. She knew that you’d both made the decision that you would carry. And that it was a smart decision–you were younger than her, your career was less demanding and unpredictable, and you worked from home. But at this moment? She wished with everything in her that it was her body and not yours going through all this.
As Emily rocked you, she felt like crying, too, even though this wasn’t hard for her, at least not like it was for you. It was easy to hold you when you cried. Easy to be there for you, to comfort you. To bring you plain toast and ice chips and to hand wash your tiny spoon so it was always ready. It was easy to hold back your hair while you vomited, to scrub the toilet every night so it’d be clean when you got up in the morning.
This was the hard part: watching you struggle, watching your body go through absolute hell, and not being able to do a thing about it. Somehow it was worse because you’d chosen to do it. For her. For the both of you, so that you could start a family. Emily had never realized what an immense sacrifice it was to grow a baby. You’d sacrificed your body, your time, your comfort, everything, to house this little human. It was humbling to watch.
When your sobs quieted to the occasional sniffle, she started running her fingers through your hair, matching the rhythm to your breath–or maybe it was the other way around.
“I’m so sorry you feel so bad, honey,” Emily said, her mouth pressed to the side of your head, trying to convey all the love and empathy and admiration she held for you. “Thank you for doing all this. For me and for us and for the little kidney bean. You’re amazing.”
You sat up, slowly reaching to grab the cup of ice chips.
“I thought we were calling her the blueberry?” you said, your voice still wavering, as you pressed the cool spoon experimentally to your lips.
Emily rubbed your back in gentle circles, her fingers cool and soothing from holding the ice chips. “Last week he was a blueberry. This week he’s the size of a kidney bean.”
You scrunched your eyebrows in thought, your hair a hornet’s nest, tiny little spoon poking out of your mouth. Emily beamed at you. Even now, when you felt your absolute shittiest, you were the most adorable person she’d ever clapped eyes on.
“So we’re just gonna change her nickname every week?”
“I mean, I am,” Emily decided, scooping a piece of ice out of your cup and crunching it in her mouth. “It helps me remember how big he is.”
You sighed, placing a gentle, protective hand over your stomach. Minus the puking and the insane hormones, it was still hard to believe there was a little human inside of you.
“You’re giving me a lot of shit, bean,” you said, directing your voice to your stomach. “You better be really cute.”
Emily leaned her head against your shoulder. “He’s made of you,” she observed. “How could he not be?”
You looked at her, feeling tears prickle at your eyes again. You huffed, sniffling and attempting to suck the tears back into your body.
“Ugh, stop being so romantic!” you exclaimed, smiling and wiping away a few rogue tears. You took her hand in yours, letting out a deep, shaky breath. “If you keep that up, I’ll never stop crying.”
“Anything for you,” she acquiesced. And you knew she meant it. She really would do anything for you. She’d go to the ends of the earth for you.
“Anything?”
“Mmhm,” she nodded.
“Even Ritz crackers?”
She laughed and kissed the side of your head before pushing herself to her feet. “One plate of Ritz crackers, coming right up.”
“My hero!” you called after her. And you meant it.
Week 9: The Grape
You wrestled against the apple slicer, standing on tiptoes to try to get enough leverage to break through. You were unreasonably angry at how much you were struggling. Leverage was usually an issue–you were short. But now your arms were weak and achy, too, like they were made of rubber.
Emily walked through the door, dropping her bag by the entryway and smiling at your struggling, tiptoed form.
“Need some help?” she asked, wrapping her arms around you from behind and kissing you on the cheek.
“No,” you huffed.
She raised her eyebrows at you.
You sighed. “Yes.”
“That’s what I thought,” she gloated, planting tiny, fluttering kisses all over your face and neck until you were giggling and your frustration had dissipated.
Emily maneuvered your body around so she could place her hands on either side of your face. She stared into your eyes for a moment before leaning down to kiss you. You didn’t know what she’d seen at work that day, what kind of gruesome, perverted crimes she was dealing with, but whatever it was, you could feel the stress of it, the darkness, seeping off and away as she relaxed into you. She kissed you eagerly, earnestly, as if you were a cool body of water after a long, dry journey.
When you ran out of air, you pulled away and pressed your head into her chest, wrapping your arms tightly around her. She exhaled heavily and carefully cradled the back of your head, resting her chin on top.
“You’re really great to come home to, you know that?” she told you, her voice vibrating around you as you hugged her.
“You want to talk about it?” you asked quietly, pulling away to look her in the eyes.
She shook her head. “No, not yet.”
You nodded and squeezed her hand. You wouldn’t push her to tell you, you never did. But she knew you were there to listen when she was ready to talk.
“Alright, let’s get you your snack,” she said, clearly wanting to move away from thinking about work.
You opened a cabinet, standing on tiptoes again to try and reach a jar of peanut butter.
“Hey,” Emily chastised, grasping at your reaching hand and squeezing it. “You go sit down. I’ll get it.”
“I can get my own snack, Emily,” you protested. You knew you were going to have to be less independent during your pregnancy, and it was a hard transition for you to make. You didn’t like depending on people, even Emily, though you were getting better about it the longer you were in a relationship with her.
“I know you can,” she said, pressing down the apple slicer as if it was nothing but a stapler. “But I like to take care of my wife.”
You couldn’t help but smile, blushing a little, as Emily peeled off one of the apple slices and popped it in your mouth.
“Now go sit down,” she ordered, playfully smacking your ass. You rolled your eyes but did as you were told. “Why don’t you queue up one of those animated shows you like so much? I’m not done with She-Ra yet, am I?”
Your face lit up like a Christmas tree. “Really!?”
She chuckled. “Yeah, of course. I gotta find out if they finally kiss.” She stared at you pointedly. “It seems like they should, right?” She was always trying to get you to reveal plot spoilers, and you were so gullible you often fell for it.
You raised your hands and shook your head as you plopped down on your corner of the couch.
“Listen, I’ll neither confirm nor deny any Sapphic plotlines.”
“Asshole,” she called, spooning peanut butter onto a plate with the apples.
She walked over to you, plate in hand, and sat down on the couch, raising her hands in the air so you could get into your normal TV-watching position.
You’d been embarrassed at first by how much you loved your head in Emily’s lap, how comfortable and safe it made you feel. For months when you’d first started dating, you’d always wait for her to pull you into her, breathing a sigh of relief when she finally did. Until one day, she’d sat down on the couch, lifted up her arms and said, “Come on, get in your spot.”
You rested your head in her lap, relishing the weight of her arms as she lowered them. You pressed play on She-Ra, and Emily passed you an apple slice dipped in peanut butter. You crunched happily. This was a good night for you. Your favorite show. Your favorite snack. Your favorite person. Almost no nausea!
Between apple slices, Emily ran her fingers through your hair. You hadn’t felt so relaxed in weeks. So relaxed you could almost…
“Hey,” Emily prompted, holding out an apple slice, but you didn’t answer. She looked down and brushed your hair out of your eyes to find you sound asleep. She smiled softly and ate the apple slice herself.
Emily loved watching you sleep. You always slept curled, your fist resting next to your face like a baby whose thumb had slipped out of its mouth in the middle of the night. She wondered briefly if the baby would sleep like that, too, and the thought gave her butterflies. She paused the show, knowing you’d be sad later if she watched it without you–you liked to watch her watch.
She scrolled through shows and movies, but finally gave up. All she wanted to watch was you. Her heart melted as you tensed and stretched a little in your sleep, your hand wrapping protectively around your stomach. She knew she should get up, should move you to the bed. She knew that once you got there, you’d curl right back into her. That she would wrap her arms tightly around you and bury her head in your neck and hold you and the baby. She’d hold you both so close, so careful and secure, and she’d sleep well knowing you were there next to her.
There was only one person in the world she trusted to keep her family safe, and that was her. Soon, she’d move you to the bedroom. Soon, she’d turn off the lights and arm the alarms and crawl into bed next to the love of her life and her unborn child. But for now–she just wanted to watch you, your hair through her fingers and the sound of your breathing grounding her to all that was good in the world.
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somerandommess · 2 days
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Maxiel au 1400 words
Spies? Hitman? one of them. Idk where this came from but I really want to see what happens next, sadly I’m the one who has to write what happens next. Also, the maxiel is kind of implied…imaginary, almost. Pre relationship kind of. Squint while using a magnifying glass and you’ll see it.
inspired by the adore you verse (@onboardsorasora ) literally so good.
Max walked through the hotel corridors, tapping an envelope in his hand as he went. He kept his head on a swivel mainly to check if anyone was following him, but also to keep an eye out for the room he was looking for.
Suddenly a door opened behind him and he immediately tensed, turning his head around to see who it was. A man in a grey suit walked out talking loudly into his phone. The guy paid him no mind, but he still watched as he made sure he got into the elevator and the doors closed.
A minute passed and he tried to make himself relax. He brought his shoulders down from his ears and removed his hand that, on reflex, went to his gun holster.
He hadn’t always been like this. Two years ago you wouldn’t catch him using a gun. It made things too easy. However, recent events made him pick it up again. That, and the bullet wound in his arm made him decide that he doesn’t care if guns made things easy; getting shot fucking hurt.
He shook out his arms and continued walking.
330…331…332…
He stopped infront the door.
333.
He looked down at himself, his dress shoes had flecks of blood on them and his pants were a little dusty. He frowned but decided he looked good enough. He had stolen a shirt from house keeping earlier, but threw away the nameplate.
Sorry Jerry D. , but he needed to look presentable for what he was about to do.
He knocked on the door.
No answer.
He waited and leaned closer to try and hear if anyone was moving around.
Nothing.
He knows that there’s someone in there because the front desk said they hadn’t checked out yet.
He realizes now that the front desk could have been lying.
He knocks again. This time he hears a thud and mumbling. No one opens the door.
Max has had enough of this.
“Listen I know you’re in there. I have something you want,” he hears the click of a lock, and smiles a bit, “Daniel-“
The door flies open and he’s pulled inside and thrown face first to the floor. He couldn’t catch himself as it was so unexpected and he curses himself for it.
He rolls onto his back and reaches for his gun to shoot-
The gun isn’t there. It’s being pointed in his face.
He leans back on his elbows, “Daniel”
The click of the safety goes off.
Max gulps.
Daniel is in jeans and nothing else. His chest is badly bruised (broken ribs?) and he’s sporting a black eye. He holds the gun in his left hand while the right stays at his side, his trigger and middle finger bandaged together.
With his injuries Max expects his hand to shake, it remains steady.
“Did Zak send you?” Daniel asks.
“No one sent me. I came looking for you.”
“Bullshit”
Max tries to get up, but Daniel fires a shot in the space between his legs.
“What the fuck” he scoots back till he hits the wall, “Do you know whose hotel this is? You can’t shoot me!”
Daniel scoffs, “I didn’t shoot you. I almost shot you, there’s a difference. And Toto knows I’m here, he won’t mind” he waves the gun around before sighing.
He tucks the gun into the waistband of his jeans and sits on the bed. He passes a hand through his hair and looks at the floor.
“What are you doing here Max?”
Max gets to his feet and walks over to the doorway where the envelope he was carrying fell. He picks it up and hands it to Daniel. He doesn’t take it so he rests it next to him on the bed.
“Sebastian has an offer for you. A way out… Revenge.”
Daniel takes the envelope, “Revenge? Last time I tried that they broke my jaw”
Max puts his hands in his pockets, “You won’t be the only one. Fernando went rogue, took Stroll with him. Even George left. He blew up HQ to show he was serious”
He looks at Max surprised. “Russell George…” he murmurs.
Max turns and watches Daniel through the mirror by the door. He watches as he opens the envelope and pulls the paper out halfway. He averts his eyes from the paper but he doesn’t miss the fond look Daniel gives as he reads the letter. Seb has always shown his love for Daniel in his own way.
Daniel puts the letter back and closes the envelope.
“So, what do you want revenge for?”
Max blinks, “Pardon?”
Daniel gets up and stands just behind him.
“I know why I want revenge, and I'm assuming everyone is either getting out or wants revenge. Which one is on your to-do list?”
Max turns and faces him, “You know what they say about assuming,”
Daniel hums and turns to get a shirt from his duffel on the floor. He groans as he stoops and Max wills himself to stay put.
He pulls out a blue party shirt with pineapples and struggles to put it on.
Max can’t take it anymore so he helps him get it over his head. Focusing his eyes on anywhere but Daniels exposed body. When he’s done they’re standing eye to eye and he tries to convince himself that Daniel did not just look at his lips.
Max breaks the silence, “You getting your revenge is enough for me.”
They stand there before Daniel blinks like he remembers something.
“How long ago did George blow up HQ?”
“Yesterday?”
“You think since he you know…that Toto…” he trails off and looks around the hotel room.
“Might try and kill you? Yes” Max finishes.
“We should leave”
“Yes”
They move around the room like a well oiled machine. Max gathering anything belonging to Daniel and shoving it into his suitcase, and Daniel taking note of his various IDs in his duffel.
They leave the room in a hurry, and Daniel is still shoving his feet into sneakers when they reach the stairwell.
They reach downstairs to the car park and Daniel whistles when he sees Maxs car.
Max rolls his eyes and shoves the suitcase onto the backseat with his own.
When he gets in, Daniel is running his hands on every surface.
“It’s just car Daniel”
“A very nice car. Stolen?”
“Rental” he starts it and revs it just to see Daniels reaction.
Daniel laughs and leans back. Max peels out of there with a drift.
A few minutes into the ride, Daniel takes the gun from his pants and tosses it into Maxs lap.
Max tries not to swerve, “It could have gone off!” he curses in Dutch.
“Safety was on”
Max takes the gun and puts it in between them next to the gear stick.
He takes the next left to the airport and Daniel freezes.
“I can’t exactly get on a plane right now. I have people looking for me”
Max rolls his eyes, “Everyone’s looking for you,”
Daniel tenses, “I mean more recently. They’re kind of upset that I stole from them. I can’t fly commercial”
“We’re not” Max says simply.
Daniel goes for the gun and points it at him. Max isn’t fazed.
“We’re flying private”
—-
“Since when did you get a jet?” Daniel watches in shock and awe as they pull up to the aircraft.
“It wasn’t my idea.” They both watch as the door opens and someone comes down the steps.
Max barely has time to put the vehicle into park before Daniel opens the door and steps out.
“Charlie?!”
Charles turns his head, “Daniel!”
They run and hug each other while Max rolls his eyes for what feels like the twentieth time today.
“Where have you been? Last I heard you were in Canada doing wet-work with Scotty”
“That was a year ago”
Charles sighs, “It’s been hard to keep in touch with you,”
Daniel feels guilty, and it must show because then Charles pats him on the back and shoves him up the stairs of the plane.
Max follows carrying two suitcases and a duffel bag.
They get settled and Daniel drinks two glasses of champagne.
Charles comes back from speaking with the captain and sits across from him and Max.
“I’m sure you have questions-“
Daniel cuts him off,
“Just one for now,” he taps the window, “where are we going?”
“London” Max answers easily.
“London? What’s in London?”
——
Not beta read
What’s in London? We may never know.
it’s Lewis. He’s in London and he brings them to a base, explanations happen, flashbacks. We find out- [gunshot]
I’ll stop
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