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restlesswasteland · 3 years

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Miserables Month Day 5: "Lesson"

Written for the Miserables Month @themiserablesmonth Get your shit together, Enjolras told himself. He tried to focus back in on what the professor was saying. They seemed to have jumped to economics in Ethiopia. The last thing Enjolras had written down were notes on the poverty stats in Hong Kong. He wasn’t sure when they’d switched topics. Or continents.

He resisted the urge to slam his head into his desk repeatedly.

Instead, he scanned the rest of his notes. They were nearly illegible. Chewing on the end of his pencil, he contemplated his situation. He’d never had trouble taking notes before. Concentrating was easy for him. Distraction wasn’t in his wheelhouse.

Until he'd met his new TA.

SOS, he texted Courf as soon as class was over. Need to borrow your Global Diplomacy in the Modern World notes.

He’d given up on trying to fill in the gaps for the rest of the lesson. His notes were already useless, he’d have to borrow anyway.

He absolutely did not spend the rest of the time trying and failing not to stare at a certain curly haired TA. Definitely not. Nor did he find himself frequently looking down at his mostly blank notebook when said TA kept meeting his gaze. Nope.

His phone buzzed as he was packing his bag.

I dropped Global Diplomacy, Courf responded.

Well, fuck.

He looked around at the rapidly emptying classroom. He didn’t know anyone else in the class. And only two weeks into the semester, he wasn’t even on speaking terms with any of them.

Which left only one option.

Enjolras shouldered his backpack and made his way to the front of the room. There was no way in hell he was going to let this- well, whatever this thing was- ruin his GPA.

“Hey,” he started, when he got to the front of the room. The TA was sitting in a chair next to the professors recently vacated desk, notebook in his lap.

“Oh, hey,” he responded. Enjolras felt his determination crumbling when the man looked up at him, but he held his ground. GPA, he reminded himself like a mantra.

“Can I help you with something?” The TA asked when Enjolras just stared at him.

“Oh, right,” Enjolras felt his face flush in embarrassment. “Can I get a copy of your notes from today’s lesson?”

“Yeah, I just have to upload them first, if that’s cool?” Enjolras nodded. “Here,” he flipped his notebook around, offered his pencil to Enjolras. “Write down your email and I’ll send it in an hour or two.

Enjolras took the pencil and scribbled down his email address in the margins, next to a doodle of a cat. He started to second guess if it was smart to put his GPA in the hands of this stranger. As if he had a choice. He handed the pencil back.

“Enjolras,” the TA read, turning his notebook back around. He offered him a lopsided smile. “I’m Grantaire.”

“Grantaire. Thanks,” Enjolras said. He fiddled with his backpack strap for a moment. “For the notes, I mean,” he added when the silence became uncomfortable.

“No problem, that’s literally my job,” Grantaire shrugged.

“Right. Well, see you on Thursday,” Enjolras said. Before the silence could stretch on again, he turned on his heel and left the classroom.

And so it began.

Grantaire sent him the promised email a few hours later. Just the notes attached to an email that read, “See you Thursday, R.”

Enjolras was relieved to find that the notes were acceptable and his GPA was likely to remain intact.

So when he found himself staring at Grantaire with a blank notebook in front of him on Thursday, he wasn’t as concerned as he’d been. That fact alone concerned him more than anything.

When class ended, he asked for his notes again. Grantaire just smiled up at him.

“Sure. Might want to try taking some of your own, though,” he said, though there was no malice in it.

“I just,” Enjolras felt his face flushing yet again. “like to make sure I’ve got all my bases covered, is all. So I don’t miss anything.”

“Very studious,” Grantaire laughed.

When he got the email later, all it said was, “So you don’t miss anything. R.” Enjolras wondered if it was too late to drop the class.

It became routine. Even when Enjolras managed to take decent notes, he asked for Grantaire’s anyway. Most emails came with a quip or reference to their brief conversations. Some were blank, though he always signed them. Enjolras found himself checking his email more habitually.

A little over a month into the semester, Enjolras’s first test came back with a satisfactory grade. His GPA no longer in danger, he began to settle into their pattern. As the semester continued to pass and nothing changed, Enjolras resigned himself to this form of communication.

“Enjolras,” Grantaire greeted him at the end of class in early November.

“Hey,” Enjolras said. “Can I-”

“Yes, you can,” Grantaire interrupted. He smiled up at Enjolras from his chair.

“Oh, okay,” Enjolras said. “Right. Thanks.”

Grantaire continued to look up at him, studying his face for a moment.

“I graded your last paper,” he finally said.

“Oh,” Enjolras wasn’t exactly sure what he meant by that.

“It was the best in the class.” He said it matter-of-factly, not exactly a compliment.

“Thanks?”

“Enjolras,” Grantaire held his gaze, “you can just ask me out for coffee instead of making me put my notes online every class, you know.”

“I-” Enjolras felt his cheeks burning.

“I can tell you don’t need them.” Grantaire mercifully cut him off. “And I only have so many pick-up lines that work via email.” He grinned.

“Pick-up lines?” Enjolras asked, blinking at Grantaire.

“You’re really dumb for a smart person,” Grantaire laughed, standing to gather his things. “So. Coffee. You free Saturday around three?”

“Yeah,” Enjolras said weakly.

“Great. I’ll meet you at Uncommon Grounds on the other side of campus.”

“Sounds good,” Enjolras said, his mind drawing some kind of blank. He couldn’t recall ever being at such a loss for words. Or being such an idiot, for that matter.

“I’ll email you the time and place, so you don’t forget,” Grantaire said, wearing a shit eating grin. “Gotta cover all your bases.”

Enjolras cringed. “Am I ever going to live that down?”

“Probably not.” Grantaire shouldered his bag and met Enjolras’s eyes. “See you Saturday,” he said, turning to go.

“See you Saturday,” Enjolras repeated to Grantaire’s back. He received a wave for his trouble.

Enjolras stood there for a moment. Huh, he thought. Are you even allowed to date your TA? He smiled to himself, uncaring. Fuck it. I’m going to have the best GPA in the class.

#the miserables month #day 5 #lesson #enjoltaire #college au #wow sorry about this #wish i had time to turn this into smut lol #les mis #writing//mine #themiserablesmonth

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beecherdrysdale · 3 years

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Project Partners - Brendan Brisson

Hey guys, so here’s a fic I started like a month ago and then kind of forgot about. Please send feedback bc I’m trying to improve my writing skills! Also, covid doesn’t exist in this.

warnings: language, underage drinking, that’s all i think?

///

“Y/L/N and Brisson.” You groan as you hear your professor name your partner for the term-long project. Of course you know who Brendan Brisson is. You had grown up as a huge hockey fan, so of course you had been watching the draft when he got drafted by the Golden Knights, and of course you had seen him playing for Team USA at World Juniors. From what you could tell of him, he seemed like the kind of guy who would make you do all the work and use hockey as an excuse as to why he couldn’t help. That’s too bad for him though, because he’s not the only varsity athlete, and swimming takes up just as much time, if not more, than hockey. Your professor continues to drone on about the project requirements as you contemplate why you even decided to take this course in the first place.

Finally, class ends, and you see Brendan walking toward you. “Hey, you’re Y/N, right? I’m Brendan,” he introduces himself.

“Yeah, I’m Y/N. Guess I’m stuck with you for the rest of the semester, huh.”

“Yeah, so I just wanted to let you know I have hock-” he started.

“Save it, Brisson,” you cut him off, “you’re not the only athlete here, OK?”

“Wow, someone really woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.”

“Sorry,” you sigh, “I’m just really tired of having to do all the work in group projects. I did it enough in high school, and I’m just so done with everyone’s excuses y’know?”

“Well, what I was trying to say is that I have hockey a lot so we should coordinate our schedules to work around it.” He pauses a second, then adds, “And whatever sport you play.”

“Swimming,” you supply.

“What?” He looks confused.

“Swimming is the sport I do,” you clarify. “Anyways, does the library at 8 on Tuesdays and Thursdays work for you? Besides when you have games or I have meets obviously.”

“Yeah that works.”

“Ok, see you tomorrow then,” you reply, turning to leave.

“Wait!” he stops you. “Can I get your number or snap or something in case I need to talk to you?”

“Yeah, sure,” you reply, quickly typing them into his phone.

“Thanks! See you tomorrow at 8,” he says before jogging to catch up to his friends.

///

The next day when you get to the library, the first thing you hear is, “You’re late. Where were you?”

“Sorry we got out of practice late and then I had to shower cuz chlorine and then I couldn’t find my hat and I didn’t want to go outside without it cuz my hair would freeze...” you begin to ramble.

“Hey, calm down, I was joking. You’re literally only like 2 minutes late.”

“Ok but I lowkey still feel bad.”

“Seriously, it’s fine,” he says, “Come on, let’s choose our topic.”

“Ok,” you respond, “so I don’t know if you have any ideas but I was thinking maybe we could do the effect of hockey on the Cold War? Cuz like you play hockey and I watch it all the time. Plus, I did a research paper on it in high school, so we could pull info from that and it shouldn’t be too hard.”

“Yeah, that sounds good,” he says, seeming distracted. “Hey, why didn’t you tell me you’re a big hockey fan?”

“Ummm, cuz you never asked? You’ve literally only spoken like 3 words to me before yesterday so I don’t know why I would tell you.”

“Ok, I guess that’s true,” he responds. He then proceeds to quiz you about hockey, seemingly trying to make sure you’re an actual fan and not just trying to use hockey to get to him like some other girls he knows. You seem to pass his test, because it’s not long before the two of you are messing around, making fun of each other’s taste in hockey teams. Two hours later, the two of you have gotten to know each other a lot better, but you haven’t even started your project.

“Shit,” you say, checking the time on your phone, “I gotta go. I still have to help my friend with her math and I have morning practice tomorrow.

“Ok, I’ll see you tomorrow in class,” he says. “And Y/N?”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t be late.”

“Omg shut up. You’re not funny,” you say playfully, as he laughs his ass off.

“You know I am,” he shoots back.

“Sure, Brisson, whatever you say. I’ll see you tomorrow,” you say as you leave.

///

After a few more library sessions, the animosity between you and Brendan which, you admit, was your fault had completely dissipated. The two of you quickly learn you actually have a lot in common, like your love of sports and your music taste, and despite his fratboy vibes you quickly grow to trust him. That’s why you don’t hesitate to say yes when he asks if you can meet at the hockey house to work on your project instead of in the library.

When you arrive at the house, you are greeted by the sound of the entire hockey team arguing over whose turn it is to make dinner. “I have to work on my project though,” you can faintly hear Brendan.

“It’s OK Brisson, sounds like you have more important things to do. We’re somehow ahead of schedule anyway,” you say, entering the kitchen.

“Seriously Y/L/N?” he groans. “You were supposed to be on my side.”

“Sorry,” you say, shrugging.

Your apology is interrupted by Cam, “Hey Brisson, who’s this? Wanna introduce us to your new girlfriend?”

“Funny,” you say. “We’re just friends. We got assigned to work on this project together. Isn’t he wheeling like 3-4 girls a weekend anyways?”

“Hey,” Brendan protests. “You make it sound like a bad thing. I only do what they want.”

“Beside the point Brisson,” Johnny jumps in. “Just introduce us to your new friend.

“Fine,” he groans. “Guys, this is Y/N. Y/N, these are the guys. Now,” he says, grabbing your arm and dragging you toward the stairs, trying to make his escape, “let’s go work on our project.”

“Not so fast, Brisson,” Nolan cuts in. “You’re making dinner. Y/N said it’s fine.”

Brendan sighs in response.

“C’mon,” you say. “I’ll help you. I promise it’s not that hard.”

Brendan begrudgingly follows you back to the kitchen as the rest of the guys scatter. You begin to pull the ingredients to make tacos, which thankfully they have, out of the fridge. “Here,” you say, tossing Brendan a tomato. “Can you dice this?”

The two of you work in silence for a few minutes before you decide to turn some music on. As you turn to reach for your phone, you glance over to see Brendan’s pile of tomatoes. “Seriously, Brisson?” you ask, staring at the haphazard pile in dismay. “Have you ever cut a tomato before? I had better cutting skills than that in preschool.” You hear a few guys snicker from the other room at that. After showing him how to cut it properly and turning on your Spotify, you continue to work, chirping Brendan occasionally. Once you and Brendan finish making dinner, you call the rest of the guys back into the kitchen to come eat.

As the guys eat, they drill you with questions, trying to find out as much as they can about Brendan’s “project partner.” You answer all their questions, and by the end of dinner you fit in seamlessly with the boys, even joining in their good-natured chirping of one another. Eventually, you have to leave, but the boys are quick to let you know you’re always welcome back whether it’s for your food or your company, you don’t know before you go.

///

As soon as you leave, all eyes are on Brendan. “So Briss, you wanna tell us about your new girlfriend?” Nolan asks.

“She said it herself, we’re just friends. We’re working on a project together,” Brendan is quick to reply.

“Sure...” Cam counters. “Friends don’t look at friends like that Brisson.”

“Like what?” Brendan asks.

“Like she hung the stars in the sky or some shit like that,” Johnny responds. “Look Briss, just go for it. It’s not like she’s gonna say no, she literally looks at you the same way.”

“But she would say no,” Brendan protests. “She’s the one who said we’re just friends first so obviously she doesn’t like me like that. Why should I go for someone who’s gonna reject me when I an go to a party and pick up whatever girl I want, like she said?”

“Because you can’t get whatever girl you want, Brisson. She’s the one you want. We can all see it,” Johnny replies.

“Ok you know what, fuck off. Leave me alone. The two of us are just friends,” Brendan reaches his breaking point. At that, the guys let it drop, Brendan’s outburst giving them all the proof they need.

///

Meanwhile, you are back in your dorm chastising yourself. Why did you have to say you and Brendan are just friends? You know any chance you had of him liking you back is now gone, because he thinks you only think of him as a friend. You debate what to do, even going so far as to pick up your phone and tap on his contact, before changing your mind and getting ready for bed. Guys like him don’t go for girls like you anyway or so you think. You’re sure he wants one of those perfect girlfriends who are always put together and dress cute, not some athlete who always walks around in sweats, and the last thing you want to do is fuck up your friendship by confessing. You ignore the feeling of jealousy that rises in your chest when you think of Brendan with another girl and force yourself to go to sleep.

///

It’s not even two days before you get a snap from Nolan asking if you want to go to a party with all of the guys. You agree immediately because you don’t have morning practice tomorrow and your plans with friends got cancelled and you’ve secretly been looking for an excuse to see Brendan outside of working on your project.

That night, you try to dress extra cute, even going so far as to ask your roommate to help you choose your outfit as she seems to have no problems picking up guys. You finally settle on an outfit and hurry out the door, wanting to make sure you get to the party on time so you can meet the guys outside and not have to walk in alone. As you walk out the door, you hear your roommate call, “Have fun! Be safe! Use a condom!” You flip her off as the door closes.

When you get to the party, you see the guys outside waiting for you. “Hey Y/N,” you hear a couple guys say.

“Heyyy,” you reply, as you guys start heading toward the house. Brendan lags behind the group, eyes trailing down your body. As much as he loved the fact that you wore what you wanted read: sweats and didn’t try to be a Barbie doll, he had to admit seeing you like this was hot. He hurries to reach the rest of the group, deciding you were standing just a little too close to Cam for his liking. He may not be able to be with you, but he sure as hell wasn’t gonna watch you date one of his teammates. He catches up and wraps an arm around your shoulders.

“Hey Brisson,” you greet. “What’s up? You learned how to cut a tomato yet?”

“Haha, very funny Y/L/N,” he responds.

“Oh come on, you know it was,” you protest.

As soon as you guys enter the house Johnny says, “I’m going to get a drink. Anyone want one?”

“Yeah, can you get me a Natty?” you’re quick to respond. “But please make sure it’s closed.”

A couple other guys request drinks, and Johnny goes to get them while the rest of you head further inside. You stay with the guys pretty much the whole night, not wanting to get separated because you know what happens to girls who are at parties alone.

At some point in the night you guys end up near the beer pong table, and when it’s Brendan’s turn he makes you be his partner not that you’re complaining and drags you over to the table. The two of you quickly get on a winning streak and you end up winning the tournament you got pulled into. At this point you’re pretty drunk, so you don’t hesitate to go along with it when Brendan hugs you, the two of you stumbling a little bit. Both of you are reluctant to let go, reveling in the feeling of each other, as each of you thinks the other doesn’t like you back so you’ll never get to experience the feeling again.

You and the guys stay at the party a little longer before they realize how drunk you are because you had had more beers than any of them and decide its time to leave. All the guys come with you back to your dorm in order to make sure you get back safe, a gesture both you and your roommate thank them for before they leave.

///

It’s a couple weeks later and you’re hanging out with the guys, as has become usual for you, when Johnny ask, “Hey Y/L/N, how come you never come to any of our games? I thought Brisson said you’re a big hockey fan.”

“Yeah, I am,” you reply, “I just usually have swim when you guys have games. Plus you guys never invite me so...”

“Well we kinda assumed you already knew you were invited,” Nolan says. “You’re always welcome at our games, and if you tell us you’re coming we can probably get you good seats.”

“OK, well we actually don’t have swim practice on Friday for some reason, so I can probably come,” you say. “I’ll try to drag my roommate to come with too.”

The boys groan, “Really, Y/N? You want us to get two tickets? Do you know how much work that is?” before quickly revealing that they’re joking and telling you that of course they’ll get you two tickets.

///

True to the boys’ word, when Johnny sits next to you in your class together on Friday, he hands you an envelope with two tickets. “What are you wearing to the game tonight?” he asks with a plan up his sleeve.

“I don’t know,” you respond. “Probably my Michigan swimming hoodie.”

“You wear that everywhere though,” he protests.

“Yeah, so?” you fire back. “It’s a Michigan hoodie. School spirit.”

“Or you could wear this,” he says pulling something out of his backpack. He unfolds it to reveal that it’s one of Brendan’s hockey hoodies.

“Doesn’t he need that for the game tonight?” you ask.

“No, he has two,” Johnny replies. “Now stop trying to get out of wearing it. You have to wear something hockey related to support us.”

“Ugh fine,” you give in, knowing Johnny will be persistent.

///

That evening, you arrive at the arena with your roommate, begrudgingly wearing the hoodie with “Brisson” boldly stamped across your back. You are not enjoying yourself, because knowing what it feels like to wear Brendan’s sweatshirt and smell his cologne makes you all the more aware that this will never be your reality. Nevertheless, you force a smile on your face as you and your roommate sit down to watch warmups. You can feel the energy in the arena even now, before the game begins, as UMich is playing rival school Ohio State.

Once warmups are over you and your roommate go to use the bathroom and get snacks. The line for the bathroom is so long you don’t think you’ll make it back to your seats before the game starts, but thankfully you get to them just a second before puck drop. The game gets off to a rough start, with Ohio State scoring twice early, but by the end of the first the guys have picked up their pace, and you hope that they’ll be able to tie it up in the second.

After intermission, the boys come out guns blazing. Brendan scores just 30 seconds in to the period off an offensive zone face-off win. As he cellies, he makes eye contact with you up in the stands. “He is so into you!” your roommate squeals when she notices.

“No he’s not, shut up,” you reply, turning your focus back to the game. The guys stay on the forecheck pretty much the whole period, and it finally pays off when Johnny scores with 5 minutes left to play in the second. When the period ends and the guys head back to the locker room, the game is tied 2-2.

The third period begins with an Ohio State faceoff win, and they quickly get off a shot attempt. Thankfully, the shot goes wide and play continues. The teams go back and forth all period getting good scoring chances, but neither team is able to capitalize. It looks like the game is going to go to overtime, but then Brendan scores again with just 43 seconds remaining. Once again, he makes eye contact with you and smiles as he cellies, and once again your roommate freaks out and says that he definitely likes you. You make her shut up and start to grab your stuff as the final seconds wind down.

“Woah, slow down. Where are we going?” she asks.

“The guys told me to meet them outside the locker rooms,” you say, beginning to lead the way.

///

When you get to the hallway outside the locker room, you lean up against the wall and start scrolling through Insta as you wait for the guys to come out. Eventually the guys slowly begin trickling out of the locker room and heading over to their various girlfriends gathered in the hallway as all the single guys congregate around you, but you ignore them so you don’t get dragged into one of their arguments.

Finally, you see Brendan come out of the locker room so you put your phone away and push your body away from the wall. He starts to make a beeline toward you and does a double take when he realizes you’re wearing one of his sweatshirts. The guys had been bugging him for weeks to ask you out and he had been thinking of maybe doing it tonight, but seeing you in his sweatshirt has finally given him the confidence to make a move. As he reaches you, you say, “Hey Briss.”

“Hey,” he replies, and then his lips are on yours, and you don’t know where this is coming from but you’ve been wanting it for a while now so of course you kiss back, and it just feels so right you don’t ever want to stop. When you finally break apart, all the guys are cheering and whistling and you hear a couple guys mutter “finally”.

As the guys quiet down, you ask Brendan, “What was that for?”

“Shit, sorry, I shouldn’t have done it,” he panics, thinking you were mad, even though you kissed back so you obviously weren’t.

“No, I liked it,” comes your reply. “It just kinda came out of nowhere.”

“Oh,” he calms down. “Well I’ve been wanting to ask you out for a while now, but I was kinda nervous so I kept putting it off. But then you looked really hot in my hoodie, so I just went for it.”

“Yes,” you say.

“Yes, what?” he asks, looking confused.

“You said you wanted to ask me out. I said yes,” you explain.

“Ok, so do you want to go get Chipotle or something tomorrow then?” he asks.

“Yeah, of course,” you reply. “But for now let’s go out and celebrate with the other guys.” He wraps his arm around your shoulders as the two of you walk with the team, and you are finally content.

#brendan brisson #umich #brendan brisson fic #brendan brisson imagine #brendan brisson x reader

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wiypt-writes · 3 years

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Stark Spangled Forever

One Shot: Wings

Intro: They say that once you’ve been inked, it kinda becomes an addiction…

Warnings: Bad language.

Pairings: Steve Rogers x OFC Katie Stark

A/N: CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR STARK SPANGLED BANNER

Disclaimer: This is a pure work of fiction and classified as 18+. Please respect this and do not read if you are underage. I do not own any characters in this series bar Katie Stark and the other OCs. By reading beyond this point you understand and accept the terms of this disclaimer.

Stark Spangled Forever Masterlist // Main Masterlist

“Jamie, ”Katie sighed exasperatedly as her 9 year old looked up from where he was sprawled on the rug of the den, piecing his newest lego kit that Sam and Bucky had bought him for his birthday “You need to get your stuff for school.” “Don’t wanna.” he pouted.

“Tough.”

“I don’t feel well.”

“Oh no, really?” Katie bent down, feeling his head. “Hmmmm. You do feel warm. What’s wrong?” “Sort throat.” “Oh, well… that means no soccer practice tomorrow then…and you should go straight back to bed until I can take you to the doctors later today…”

Jamie paused and looked up at her and she raised an eyebrow “Nice try Pal.”

“Mommmm”

“Don’t make me shout your father.” she used her ace card.

Jamie gave an exaggerated sigh and stood up, rolling his eyes. Katie bit her lip to stop herself laughing at the utter indignation on his face.

“It’s Friday dude.” she smiled at him. “You got all weekend to play legos if that’s what you wanna do.”

“Does that mean I can stay up late tonight to work on it?” he asked hopefully.

“Define late.” Katie looked at him.

“11?”

“Hmmmm, I dunno.” she said playfully.

“Please?”

“I’ll speak to your dad.” she said and he smiled at her, the pair of them both knowing full well that Steve was a soft touch when it came to stuff like that. He’d probably be there helping him out with it anyway.

“Ok Mom. Can you make sure Harry doesn’t touch it whilst I’m at school?”

“I’ll keep this door shut, I promise.” Katie assured him.

He left the room and true to her word Katie shut the door to the den and watched him head up the stairs, passing Aurora who was on her way down with her rucksack, Steve right behind her with their youngest placed on his hip.

“Hi mammamama!” Harry babbled at her and she grinned, taking him off Steve and planting a kiss to his cheek.

“Hi baby!” she grinned as his hand instantly went to grab the chain of her necklace.

“Jamie not planning on going to school today?” Steve asked her with a grin as Rori headed off to find her shoes.

“Tried telling me he was sick so he could stay home and play legos.” she snorted “Soon decided he was ok when I told him that meant no soccer practice tomorrow morning.” Steve shook his head, smiling to himself.

“Daddy?” Rori tugged on his trouser leg and he turned his attention to her.

“What’s up Princess?”

“I can’t find my sneakers.”

“Where did you leave them?” he asked, his hand gently dropping to the back of her head.

“Erm…” she pondered for a moment, before she looked up at her mom bashfully.

“Somebody left them in the middle of the lounge…” Katie looked at her. “So the Fairies put them away.”

“Sorry…” Rori wrinkled her nose and blinked up at her mom.

“It’s ok. They’re on the shoe rack sweetie.” Katie nodded to the kitchen in the direction of the utility room located at the back of the house.

“Thanks momma.” she said, running off to retrieve them.

“What time does Emmy’s train get in?” Steve looked at Katie.

“Just after twelve.” Katie said, blowing a raspberry on Harry’s cheek. “I’ll meet her and then take her straight to get inked…” Steve let out a breath from his nose. All Emmy had talked about since turning 21st was a tattoo. Steve wasn’t particularly sure he approved but then what could he do? She was an adult now. Katie hadn’t been bothered, but then as she’d pointed out, she had a big enough one on her thigh so it would be fairly hypocritical if she had. Emmy had won Steve over though when she’d asked him to draw it for her. She’d described what she wanted, a small Phoenix type bird that would sit just above her ankle. So after a few designs and sketches she’d finally settled on something she wanted and after a consultation she was having it done this afternoon.

“You staying with her?” Steve looked at Katie, concern etched across his face. Katie gave a soft laugh.

“She’s a big girl now Steve but yeah, I’m gonna stay.” she said, tugging on his beard playfully.

“Good.” he nodded, jerking his head out of reach. “Do you need me to pick the kids up later or…”

“No, by the time their afterschool clubs are done we’ll have finished so I’ll do it.” she smiled as Rori came back, sneakers in her hand. She sat on the bottom step and proceeded to push her feet into the pink converse, Steve crouching down on one knee to tie her shoelaces for her.

“Thanks daddy.”

“You’re welcome sweetheart.” he said, dropping a kiss to her head before he turned to look up the stairs “Jamie! Come on!”

“I’m coming…” came the surly reply, and no sooner had they heard it he appeared at the top of the steps, rucksack in hand.

“Drop the attitude.” Steve said sternly as Jamie trudged down the stairs, scowling. Steve looked at Katie, raising his eyebrow as their eldest son stalked past them, heading to the door, Rori running behind him.

“Wait for me Jay…” she called, her small feet slapping on the tiles of the hallway as she went.

“Told you…” Katie said, smirking “He’s a mini you…”

“That filthy look he had on his face? That is a Stark expression.” Steve said, looking back at her as he picked Rori’s rucksack up.

“Is not.” Katie laughed “That’s the face you make whenever someone’s pissing you off.”

Steve gave a snort before he dropped a soft kiss to her lips, making Harry shriek.

“Kissy!” he laughed.

“See you later.” Steve smiled against her mouth “Love you.” “You too” she said, and with a last peck and a ruffle of Harry’s hair he headed after Jamie and Rori, barking out an instruction for them to quit their squabble over who was sitting in the front seat.

“Easy solution…” Katie heard Steve say loudly “You can both get in the back. End of discussion.”

Their protest’s died as the door snapped shut.

Katie chuckled to herself and looked at Harry “Shall we get you ready to go too baby boy?”

“Go!” he nodded, grinning.

*******

Katie’s morning was reasonably easy. A meeting and a manuscript to review which she’d managed to do by half 11. Changing out of her office clothes into a loose pair of sweats, trainers and a hoody she headed out and made her way to Grand Central.

She spotted Emmy emerging into the main terminal and swept her daughter up into a hug.

“Hey mom.” Emmy said, squeezing her back.

“Ready to go get inked?” Katie asked, Emmy grinned and slung her satchel over one shoulder, linking her arm through her mom’s.

“You eaten?” Katie asked as they walked out into the early April sun.

“Yeah, followed the instructions.” Emmy nodded.

“Good.” Katie said. “Nervous?”

“A little.” Emmy shrugged “It’s gonna hurt right?”

“It’s not so bad.” Katie shrugged, “Some places hurt more apparently but…most important thing to remember is if you need a break just ask.”

“Ok.”

The two women walked a few blocks, catching up. It had been a couple of weeks since Emmy was home, fast approaching the last few weeks of the semester at Harvard before her exams started. All of her marks so far had been sky high, leaving her parents immensely proud, although both had taken great pains to tell her that they didn’t care what the outcome was, as long as she tried her best.

Eventually they reached the place and Emmy opened the door, stepping in. David, the man that had done the consultation a few weeks back beckoned them both through.

“Ok, so…” he said, tilting the screen to show Emmy the picture of her design he’d scanned “I gotta say I’m excited about this one, it’s pretty unique.”

“My dad drew it.” Emmy beamed.

“It’s phenomenal.” David smiled “I had to sharpen some of the lines up but there’s no major changes. Are you happy with it?”

Emmy nodded.

“Ok, and yours Mrs Rogers…” David clicked and the imaged changed. “The touches we’re adding to your thigh are fairly straight forward but this one…this is what I think it is right?”

Katie nodded.

“Awesome…” David smiled, and hit print and stood up to collect both the prints.

“Have you told Dad?” Emmy looked at her. Katie smirked and shook her head.

“Nope.” she popped the p on the word “Thought it would be a nice surprise when he gets to see it later.” “I’m not sure if I should be grossed out by that thought or not.” Emmy mumbled and Katie simply laughed.

Just over 2 and a half hours later they were done, leaving the parlour with strict after care instructions. Emmy had hardly flinched through hers, whereas Katie’s new one had been slightly uncomfortable due to the placing.

“Think that earned us a beer…” Katie said checking her watch. “Come on, we got time before we need to collect the heathens.”

***** “Show me! Show me!” Rori demanded.

“You can’t see it yet short stuff.” Emmy said fondly “It’s still wrapped up.”

“When can you unwrap it?” Jamie asked.

“Another hour or so yet.” Katie answered “So quit bugging your sister and go put your school bags away.”

“Emmy do you wanna watch Sponge Bob with me?” Rori asked.

“Only if we can sing the special song…” Emmy grinned, holding her hand out for a hi-five. Rori giggled, and slapped her smaller palm against her sister’s.

“What special song?” Katie looked at her.

“Oh just a variation on the theme tune we made up.” Emmy said, grinning mischievously

“I dread to think.” Katie muttered, watching Jamie and Rori head up stairs to deposit their rucksacks in their room.

Katie bustled around making dinner, simple spaghetti and meatballs as requested by all 4 kids…well, the elder 3…Harry merely clapped his hands and yelled “getty” in agreement. She was stood stirring the sauce when she heard Steve walk through the door an toss his keys onto the table in the hall little under an hour later.

“Daddy’s home!” she heard Rori shriek and a moment later Steve chuckled.

“Hey…” he said, sweeping her up and placing a kiss on her cheek. He carried her through to the kitchen where he greeted Harry with a ruffle of the hair as he sat by the table doodling on a pad with Emmy.

“Hi sweetie.” Steve said, as Emmy stood up to give him a hug. “How was the tattooing?”

“Good.” she nodded, “Oh, actually, mom….should I unwrap it now?”

“Errr, yeah.” Katie said, turning the heat down on the stove and accepting the kiss Steve offered. “Can you watch these 2. I’ll go help Emmy out…”

“Sure.” Steve said, “Where’s Jamie?”

“2 guesses” Katie grinned at him and Steve shook his head, smiling, knowing full well that meant he was nose deep in lego.

Katie and Emmy bounded up the stairs and returned about 15 minutes later, Emmy proudly showing off the design on her right ankle. Steve had to admit, it did look pretty good, but then he would say that, he drew it after all.

They dragged Jamie out of the den for dinner, where the boy managed 2 helpings before he ran off again, almost having a meltdown when Katie told him he had to share the den as Rori wanted to watch Cartoons. One stern look from Steve nipped the tantrum in the bud and the 4 kids departed once dishes had been deposited in the sink, Katie waving away Emmy’s offer to help, telling her to go spend some time with her siblings. It didn’t take her and Steve long to clear down and they were heading towards the living room to collapse onto the sofa together, but the shriek and cheers coming from the den made them both stop in their tracks.

“What on Earth are they watching?” Steve looked at his wife.

“Sponge Bob, apparently…” Katie said. The two looked at one another, before they headed back towards the den and peeked through the door which was open a crack.

Emmy was stood, swaying with Harry held on her hip, the pair of them laughing, whilst Jamie was doing some kind of strange running man dance as Rori bounced up and down on the sofa as the opening credits began to roll. Emmy opened her mouth and started singing along to the opening theme tune in a pirate voice.

Only she wasn’t singing the theme tune. They were completely different words.

“Who lived as a Capsicle under the sea?” Emmy paused to look at Jamie and Rori who both yelled back in chorus, Harry mimicking them as best he could whilst clapping his hands.

“CAPTAIN ROGERS!”

Steve blinked, looked at Katie, his mouth dropping open as she burst out laughing at the look of utter confusion and perplexment on his face. She pushed the door open further and all the kids turned to see their parents watching them. But instead of stopping, they continued to sing even louder at Steve as he folded his arms and leaned against the door frame.

“Saluting a hello and killing Nazis…” Emmy continued

“CAPTAIN ROGERS!”

“If patriotism be something you wish…”

“CAPTAIN ROGERS!”

By this point Katie was laughing that hard she couldn’t breathe. She doubled over, tears pouring from her face as the kids continued their relentless serenade to their father.

“Then throw a big shield and punch with your fist…”

“CAPTAIN ROGERS!”

That was it. Steve couldn’t keep his face straight any longer and he too started to laugh, grinning as Rori ran over to him and pulled on his hands dragging him into the room to make him twirl her round.

Eventually the song stopped and the room was simply filled with laughter which died down. Steve wiped his eyes and looked at his kids before he crossed his arms.

“You’re all grounded.” he smirked, and then ran as they started pelting him with throw cushions.

****

Later that night, as always, Steve couldn’t stop his eyes from roving his wife’s body as she walked out of the en-suite and into the bedroom, dressed in one of his shirts and a pair of sleep shorts ready for bed. As he lounged on top of the duvet, back propped up against the headboard, his gaze travelled down the lines of her body and he frowned as he spotted something on her thigh that looked different.

Suddenly it dawned on him what it was.

“Is that…is that a new tattoo?” Steve sat up, looking at her leg then to her face, and back again.

“Technically it’s an addition to an existing one.” Katie grinned as she made her way to the bed and knelt up in front of Steve. His hands gently fell to her hips as he examined the new ink. The area surrounding one of the 4 stars that formed part of the original tattoo had been shaded with red and gold in a water colour effect. He didn’t need her to explain, but she did anyway.

“That’s for Tony.” she said softly, “And these…” she pointed out 4 additional stars she’d had placed within the existing design “One for each of the kids.”

“Not one for me?” he eventually pouted playfully, looking back up at her.

She bit her lip and grinning slightly, pulled his shirt over her head leaving her top half naked, and she turned her torso slightly the left, holding her arm over her breasts so he could see. His eyes widened as he saw the design that was now etched onto her skin just underneath her left breast on her rib cage.

It was his wings. The wings he had worn on his helmet. The wings adopted by the Howlies as their symbol in the war. And above that sat a star that was the same as the others on her thigh.

“That’s for you…” she said softly.

Steve was struggling for words. There was something he was finding outrageously sexy about the fact she’d had that placed somewhere that no one would really see other than him. And something ridiculously sentimental about the design she had chosen.

“Do you like it Soldier?” she asked softly, biting her lip.

He looked up at her, smiling as his hands gripped her bare waist and he pulled her down with him so she was led on top of him. “I love it.”

“I love you…” she grinned, melting into his arms as his hands ran up her bare back, her nose nudging his softly.

“Back at ya pretty girl.” he smirked, before his lips claimed hers in a heated kiss.

**Original Posting**

#stark spangled forever #steve rogers #steve rogers fanfiction #Katie Stark #steve rogers x ofc #steve rogers x original female character #steve rogers fic #mcu #mcu fanfic #chris evans #chris evans characters

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redrobinfection · 4 years

Text

(16) Graveyard

SociallyAwkwardFox’s Spooktober (2018) - Day 16 “Graveyard”

~*~

"How about four out of seven?" Tim asked with a shrug, winding up the toilet paper roll again.

Damian, his fellow barista, threw his roll at Tim's head, missing wildly. He glared. "You cheated, Drake!"

Tim rolled his eyes as he retrieved Damian's roll and began winding it up too. "How could I cheat at coffee cup bowling, ‘Wayne’?"

"You wind your roll too tightly. It doesn't unravel as much when you pitch it and thus has more mass by the time it hits the cups."

Tim raised his eyebrows. "What are you now, a physics major? That just sounds like strategy, dude. You are free to roll your roll as tightly as you'd like. That isn't against the rules."

Damian fumed. "The rules you made up! This is why I said we should use the rice crispy ba--customer."

Tim whirled on the spot, seeing that, indeed, a paying customer had entered their little, semi-enclosed coffee shop. Outside, a few students sat or sprawled over the sectional couches that filled the large basement of the university student union in which the shop was located.

Tim turned and vaulted over the counter. He heard a quiet "-tch-" from Damian as he walked to the hinged raise-able section of the counter and let himself in.

Tim straightened his apron and stepped up the register with a smile. The customer stood about five feet from the register, head tilted back, studying the menu board over Tim's head with bleary eyes. The guy was like a zombie, he was that exhausted. Tim cut his eyes over to the clock on the wall. 3:45 am. Hell of a time for coffee.

Tim glanced over his shoulder at Damian, who was reawakening the cranky espresso machine with deft fingers. Seven hours and forty-five minutes with Damian "the Demon " Wayne down, only four hours and fifteen minutes to go. Tim turned back to their customer and sighed. This was going to be a loooooooong morning.

At second glance, there was something familiar about the guy, but Tim couldn't put his finger on where he knew him. The guy had pretty teal eyes, but they were reddened and dull, like he hadn't closed them except to blink in way too long. He was also pretty well cut, Tim noticed, with clearly muscled arms and pecs so defined that Tim could clearly see them through the man's sweater. Maybe that's how Tim knew him? Maybe he'd seen him in the UREC weight room?

The guy's most eye-catching feature by far was the white forelock that curled down over his forehead. He was the third person Tim had met to have a whitened forelock like that; the other two were fraternal twins who had had small patches of albinism right at their widows peaks which affected both the skin and hair. Tim idly wondered if this guy's white lock was natural too. In any case, it looked frickin' cool, a lot cooler than his own; the best thing he could say about his own hair was that he could pull off the 90's curtain cut plus semi-mullet well enough that he could go an entire semester on a single haircut.

Tim was drawn out of his thoughts when dude finally stepped up to the counter and began to speak.

"Uh, hi, could I get a large, double-shot caramel latte?"

"Absolutely. How many pumps of caramel do you want?" Tim asked cheerily.

The guy looked up from digging through his overly stuffed messenger bag. "Uhh…the normal four should be fine."

"Okay, that will be $6.47. Can I get a name for the order?"

The guy didn't look up this time. "Uh, Jason. Gimme a sec', I know my wallet is at the bottom of this thing somewhere."

"No problem, take your time. It's not like we have a line, anyway," Tim joked.

This guy looked so dead right now--inside and out--that if he didn't find his wallet, then Tim would probably just buy the coffee for the guy himself. He understood better than anyone the sudden need for caffeine at odd hours of the day. He's not sure how he would have finished half his computer science projects this term without a much-needed double-espresso every couple of hours, to be honest.

The guy--'Jason' apparently--finally fished out a small money clip then handed over a student ID card. "Put it on my Dining Dollars, please."

"Yeah, no probl- wait a minute!" Tim cut off, staring. Suddenly, it had hit Tim where he knew this guy. "Aren't you that kid who always sits at the front of Professor Hyatt's nine-fifteen, Tuesday-Thursday, Modern European Literature and answers all the questions?"

The dude raised an eyebrow. "Uh, yeah. Why…? Wait…" He squinted and leaned in. "Aren't you the kid who once tried to sit all the way back in the AV booth, since, and I quote, 'the back wasn't far enough back'?"

Tim grinned as he swiped the ID card through the register. "Haha, yeah."

Damian moved as if to step up to the counter, the guy's drink in hand, but stopped dead about a foot away. He stared.

"Wait. Aren't you the guy who always comes in, gets tea, and sits in the window over there and reads romance novels?" Damian asked, eying him appraisingly.

The dude huffed. "Yes. My name is Jason--by the way--and they're not romance novels, it's classic lit. Now can I get my coffee?"

Damian handed the coffee over the counter, but raised an eyebrow skeptically. "You mean to tell me Rebecca is not a romance novel?"

"Wait, what!? Do you mean Daphne du Maurier's Rebecca?" Tim asked as he handed Jason's ID card back over the counter.

Damian nodded wordlessly. Tim snorted, then said, "That's not a romance! That's a totally a murder mystery! You must be confusing it with Jane Eyre. I get those mixed up too."

Jason nodded in agreement, tucking his ID away before taking his first sip of coffee. He moaned, his eyes fluttering for a moment as he savored in the sweet bliss of piping hot caffeine at 3:49 in the morning, then he looked at Damian and said, "Well, actually, I'll give you that one, uh…" --he paused to squint at Damian's name tag-- "...'Damian'; Rebecca is a modern romance novel by classification, but it's also a crime thriller just like--whazzatsay?--'Tim' said."

He turned to Tim. "I'm not surprised you'd confuse it with Jane Eyre, considering that a lot of scholars believe du Maurier adapted it from Jane Eyre."

"Wait, really?" Tim said with a laugh. "I'm glad I'm not the only one thinking that! Rebecca is like the less boring version of Jane Eyre."

Jason froze halfway into sitting down in one of the arm chairs that lined the wall closest to the door and looked up at Tim as if he had just suggested burning down the library or something similarly unthinkable. "Whaaaaaat?! I can't believe you just implied that any of the Brontë sisters' works is boring!"

Tim laughed again. "I mean, don't get me wrong, I was only twelve when I read Jane Eyre, so maybe I'd enjoy it more if I read it again now--with a mature perspective--but I remember Rebecca being a blast for thirteen-year-old me so…" He smiled, then shrugged.

Jason stared. "Twelve? Thirteen? Jeez. What else were you trying to read that young?"

"I mean, I read Moby Dick the year before that, in sixth grade," Tim admitted, shrugging until his shoulders hit his ears.

Jason gave him a flat stare. "Moby Dick? Moby fucking Dick? You've gotta be kidding me. And lemme guess, you also thought Herman Melville's masterpiece was a load of crock?"

Tim laughed, but shook his head and waved his hands placatingly. "No, no, no. I only understood, like, every fifth word--so.many.whaling.terms!--and it took me four months to get halfway in only to realize there was no way I was going to finish it by the end of the school year--I ended up skipping to the end and guessing for a lot of the AR test questions--but I definitely got the sense that it was a seminal work and that I was just too young to appreciate it. I've always meant to go back and try it again, but I still haven't gotten around to it."

"Why the hell were you trying to read Moby Dick at the age of twelve?" Jason asked incredulously, leaning back in the chair and taking a long sip of his coffee.

"Eleven, but, ah, well, my mom was convinced I had to be The BestTM in everything, so she pushed me to max out my Accelerated Reader level by the end of sixth grade and demanded that I always get the most AR points of anyone in my class, so I read a lot of the 20 point-and-up books." Tim tapped his chin thoughtfully. "I think Moby Dick was 47 points...Rebecca was 25...Jane Eyre was 33..."

Jason stared, shaking his head slowly. "So…what? You're fine with Moby Dick, a romance of the American Renaissance, but a gothic romance of the British Victorian era like Jane Eyre isn't good enough for you? Next you'll try to tell me you think Wuthering Heights is a snooze fest!"

"Well, I mean, I never could get into it, so…"

Jason slammed both hands down on the arms of his chair, incensed. "Okay, Mister, get your butt over here and sit down, we need to have a talk about Victorian Gothic and why, hands down, it is some of the best literature ever written."

Tim laughed again, then bit his lip, considering the offer. He glanced around the nearly empty coffee shop. Then he leaned over the counter and looked out into the lounge--there were exactly four people there and only one of them wasn't completely asleep in their books. Yeah, he could probably afford to humor the man.

He turned to Damian. "Hey, Dames, I'm going to make myself a coffee and take my break. You good to hold down the fort?"

"I told you not to call me that," Damian snapped, but there was no real heat to it; he liked to pretend that he hated the guts of all his coworkers, but Tim knew that he was Damian's favorite. "However, yes, I think I can manage. Go take your damned break, but when you come back I fully expect a rematch in bowling…and don't you dare cheat this time!"

Tim rolled his eyes and groaned, then turned toward trying to coax Ol' 'Spressolino--their affectionate name for the cantankerous espresso machine--into spitting out a double-shot for him. "It's not cheating, but fine, we'll do it your way," Tim replied. "But I'm telling you, you have to buy those rice crispy balls. I definitely don't want to have to explain to Barbara why some of the food on sale looks like it went through the spin cycle in a dorm washer."

Damian grinned smugly. "My pleasure. It will be a small price to pay in order to ensure your swift defeat."

Tim shook his head, grabbed his espresso in one hand and two biscotti off the front counter in the other, ducked under the counter drawbridge, then slid into the armchair across from Jason. He offered one of the biscotti to the other man and Jason accepted the free food with an appreciative smile. He already looked ten times less zombie-like, thanks to the caffiene, and he was honestly pretty damn attractive.

"Okay," Tim said, peeling the wrapper off his own biscotti and dunking it into his bitter cup of joy, "Educate me."

Between sips of coffee and bites of biscotti, Jason began explaining his thoughts on the romantic period of literature, but barely a minute into his lecture, a plastic-wrapped, ball-shaped rice crispy treat about the size of a cantelope whizzed by their feet and crashed into the ten extra-large paper coffee cups arranged in a bowling triangle at one end of the coffee shop, scattering them in a definitive strike.

Jason jumped in his seat and looked around wildly. "What the fuck?"

Tim sighed. "Daaaaaaamiaaaaaaan…"

"Shut up, Drake! I'm practicing. I need to hone my skills and adjust my form so I can thoroughly crush you in our next round," Damian called back. He marched from the counter to the end of the shop to retrieved his plastic-wrapped projectile.

Jason blinked in confusion. "I repeat: what the ever-loving fuck?"

Tim sighed again, then explained, saying, "It gets pretty boring in here during the graveyard shift, so we invented a game, coffee cup bowling. Normally, we'd sleep or study, but Damian finished his exams two days ago and I don't really study for exams, per se-"

"And sleep is for the weak," Damian finished, nodding as he walked past them carrying his sweet, gooey ammunition.

Tim nodded sagely, in agreement. "Sleep is for the weak."

Jason glanced over Tim's shoulder at the coffee cup bowling 'pins' and then over his shoulder at Damian as he lined up another throw. "You guys are insane," he declared.

Tim made a dismissive gesture. "I mean this is my third graveyard shift in a row and Damian here is almost 20 hours into a 24-hour stint. After that much sleep deprivation, you'd lose your sanity too."

Jason tilted his head in acknowledgement. "Fair enough."

"If you want, you're welcome to join us after we finish our coffee and literature talk," Tim offered amiably.

Jason watched as Damian threw another strike, sending one cup so far it landed in the pot of the ficus in the corner, and raised his eyebrows. "You know what…why not." He turned back to Tim with a grin. "I could use a bit of fun before I go back to work on my Native American Lit paper."

"Are you a lit major?" Tim asked curiously.

"I am."

Tim nodded. "That makes sense."

"And you?"

"I'm a CS major--computer science."

"That makes sense," Jason echoed, grinning.

Tim grinned back at him and waved a hand. "Okay, so as you were saying…?"

"Yes, as I was saying…"

Jason continued his little lecture while they continued sipping their coffee and nibbling on the biscotti. When they had finished--the coffee, not the discussion, because Tim was pretty sure Jason would go on for hours about literature once you got him started--they joined Damian in a game of "ten-cup."

It was in the middle of this heated battle of cups and marshmallow-bonded puffed-rice cereal balls that their next customer found them fifteen minutes later. The man, dressed in flower printed leggings and a black hoodie with "Gotham University Aerial Arts" printed across the chest in blue, took one look at them and grinned.

"Oh, hey! Coffee-cup bowling! I love that game! Do you think I could interrupt you guys for just a sec to get some hot chocolate?"

All three of them--the two baristas plus their customer--turned and stared.

"Hot… wait, what?" Jason said, laughing a little. "Man, it's like 4:30 in the morning. Why are you getting a hot chocolate at 4:30 in the morning?"

The man laughed, too, shrugging before he explained, saying, "I don't like tea or coffee all that much, but I just finished a 20 page paper on ethics in police enforcement and I need a pick me up. I need to get my warm fuzzies going again."

Tim rolled his eyes and sighed, moving back toward the counter to get the man his drink. "You're going to end up being the cuddliest cop on the street, Dick."

"You know it, Timmy!" the man--'Dick' apparently--exclaimed, pulling Tim into a bear hug when he made the mistake of passing too close to Dick on his way to the counter. The hug escalated into a full on octopus hug as he lifted his legs to wrap around Tim's hips. Tim, for his part, ignored the grapple, opening the leaf in the counter and hobbling over to the drink bar with the human cephalopod still attached.

Damian and Jason stared. Damian cleared his throat and eyed Dick with poorly disguised interest. "Wait, do you know this man, Drake?"

Tim blinked dully as he turned around, a cup in one hand and a packet of instant hot chocolate in the other. "Yes. He's my brother." Dick made a squeeing noise and nuzzled his head into Tim's neck. Tim sighed. "My adopted brother," he amended testily.

Dick laughed, dropped his feet back onto the floor and stood up. He nearly wrung Tim's neck as he tried to hug him around the shoulders. "Awww, don't be like that, Tim. We haven't seen each other in two whole weeks and I needed my Tim-hugs! Gotta meet my cuddle-quota."

Tim shook his head and handed the hot chocolate back over his shoulder. "You're insufferably, insatiably clingy when you're this tired, Dick. Go home and sleep."

Dick finally released him to take the drink. He took a sip of the hot chocolate, sighing in appreciation. "Thanks, Tim, and yeah, but, only if you do the same. You're just as bad as me when you haven't slept, if not worse."

"Can't. Working," Tim answered curtly, vaulting the counter to escape before Dick's grabby hands could reach for him again. His brother wasn't wrong; Tim was always up for a good cuddle after a long stint without proper sleep, but he didn't like public displays of affection.

Dick took one look at the nearly empty coffee shop, the three of them, their game, and then laughed out loud. "Ahhh, the days of getting paid to drink coffee and make up games at 4:30 in the morning. I kind of miss it."

"Would you care to join us," Damian asked abruptly. Dick brightened.

"Absolutely!"

And so that was how the four of them ended up bowling for empty coffee cups with rice crispy treats the size of spaghetti squash while blasting ABBA’s greatest hits--Dick's terrible, wonderful idea--until the sun rose and their shift ended, at eight AM.

By the time the four of them walked out the door, Dick was trying to convince Damian to join him in the aerials gym before breakfast, and Damian, clearly eager to do anything with the handsome college senior, accepted readily. Jason and Tim, on the other hand, were back to discussing literature over coffee--now focused on the merits and downfalls of contemporary science fiction and fantasy as an art form--and making their way to the East Campus Dining Hall, so they could continue their discussion over breakfast.

Tim snorted softly as he listened to Jason list all the ways Dune defined an era of sci-fi/fantasy, then smiled at the way Jason took his hand--without seeming to realize it--to pull him forward after the crosswalk light changed out of Tim's line of sight. Oh, yeah, this one was totally gay/bi/pan and he was definitely asking him out the minute he saw the opportunity, Tim decided.

He smiled. Who would of thought he'd come out of last night's graveyard shift not only having seen his demon coworker and his older brother hit it off--of all things!--but having met someone for himself too! He laughed, thinking, you never know what crazy things you might see, or the people you might meet, at the campus coffee shop at 4 o' clock in the morning!

#my writing #christmasriverswrites #jaytim #dickdami #tim and damian #pre-relationship #college au #no capes #new for 2020!#barely edited; life is rough right now 🙃

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argylemnwrites · 4 years

Text

Why Are We Still Waiting? - Prologue

Pairing: Drake Walker x MC (Riley Liu)

Book: The Royal Romance (It Couldn’t Wait Another Moment universe, just over one year after the epilogue)

Word Count: ~5500

Rating: R (language only)

Summary: As Riley prepares for a new chapter in her life, she’s forced to reflect on a time when things felt much less certain.

Author’s Note: Well, the sequel’s here... and I feel like it’s gonna not be what any of you all are expecting, but hopefully you will enjoy the journey still. We are so far from canon at this point, given the diverging plots, so no point comparing this timeline to that timeline. This prologue is set 13 months after the epilogue of It Couldn’t Wait Another Moment, but it does feature a flashback (in italics) to an event that happened about 4 months after that epilogue. The subsequent chapters will pick up about 8 months down the road from this prologue, or 21 months after the ICWAM epilogue.

Riley rifled through her purse, trying to find her keys, eventually finding them shoved beneath her phone, three tubes of lip gloss, and her flashcards that had scattered everywhere when the rubber band broke. Flashcards that were now sticky with lip gloss, she realized as her hand came out with tacky coral streaks across her knuckles. Oh well. Nothing was going to kill her good mood today.

She had just finished her last final exam of the spring semester. And provided she passed, which she was pretty confident she had, she would be a college graduate. It was crazy to think about. After her mother’s death, she assumed her degree would just sit unfinished, those last two semesters of credits seemingly unattainable. But now, she had probably just completed her last requirement for her BA in Communication Studies and Resources. Combine that with the fact that she had a likely job offer pending from the director of a PR firm who had led her Race and Media seminar and that she was getting married in four weeks, and she was riding high.

Hana had told her she was crazy when Riley had told her the wedding was going to be a month after her courses ended, but honestly, it hadn’t been too bad. Sure, Riley probably should have checked the academic calendar before she and Drake set the date, but they only had 23 people coming down to Texas, and that included Maxwell who was officiating. And an outdoor, casual wedding on a ranch involved a lot fewer details than the ritzy London soiree Hana and Catherine were currently putting together. At this point, all that was really left was trying on her dress one last time so Hana could see if she needed to make any last alterations, and that was happening next week when Hana was coming to New York for both business and the bachelorette party.

Climbing the steps, Riley knew she had to be basically grinning. She could smell something delicious coming from their apartment. She’d suspected Drake was going to make something special for dinner tonight, and the aroma that was wafting down the hallway confirmed that she was in for a treat. He could hear his voice muffled through the door as she turned the key, meaning he was probably on the phone. Knowing that he liked to keep the phone on speaker when he was cooking, she kept quiet as she opened the door and entered their apartment, not wanting to interrupt his conversation.

“Savannah, you gotta slow down,” Drake said towards his phone which was sitting on the counter as he held a knife over a cutting board.

Savannah’s sobs could be heard through the speaker phone, slightly distorted and off. “I just feel like… such… an idiot. And Drake, I don’t know what to do.”

Drake glanced up as Anderson trotted over to greet Riley, but she raised her hand and shook her head. If his sister was having some sort of crisis, that came before celebrating the end of finals.

“It’s bad enough that I’m the… unwed Baby Mama at court, but to get knocked up... again? Drake, I can’t let them know. They barely accept me being with Bertie as it is.”

Riley’s eyebrows shot up as she quietly hung her purse up on the hooks Drake had installed by the door and sat down at the table. Maybe she should feel bad about essentially eavesdropping, but Drake was going to tell her everything Savannah said anyway. Particularly something as massive as this.

“Who cares what they think?” Drake asked as he set the knife down and rubbed the back of his neck in frustration.

“I care!”

Drake let out a little sigh and shook his head. “What does Bertrand think about all of this?”

“He was a little shell shocked at first, but then he marched into his office and pulled a ring box out of a desk drawer. Apparently, he’d been planning on proposing for a while.”

Riley glanced down at the heirloom ring on her left ring finger. Savannah’s story was eerily familiar, and suddenly found herself thinking back on an afternoon last August.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Riley laid on the floor of the kitchen, trying to slow her mind down. It was a technique she’d been trying at her therapist’s suggestion for the past few months any time she found herself about to dive into a massive decision without giving it any thought. Apparently, her life experiences during her childhood and adolescence had created a habit of her rushing through major choices so that she wouldn’t have to think about possible negative outcomes. An avoidant coping mechanism was what he called it. Riley thought it was a little absurd that he needed a term for everything, and she didn’t think it took a genius to figure out that her absent father, her addict mother, and the endless string of foster homes messed her up in some ways, but he was relaxed and easy to talk to, which she supposed was what really mattered.

“Just find a way to ground yourself in the moment. Connect yourself to the physical environment, and let your thoughts settle. Give it a try, okay?” he’d requested, so she’d done it a few times since then, like when she was signing up for courses for the semester or when she and Drake had decided on this apartment. Laying down and closing her eyes usually worked pretty well. It helped clear her mind as her body adjusted to the position and the feel of the floor. But today, she couldn’t slow things down. Probably because her mind was racing thinking about the feel of her body, trying to determine if she felt any different. She knew that was stupid, but she just couldn’t help it.

Her phone buzzed on the floor next to her, but she didn’t want to pick it up. Because if she picked it up, she would have to look at her calendar again, the thing that was the source of her current panic and that she had killed the screen to avoid.

It was really the phone’s fault, her current predicament. She and Drake had upgraded their phones about 6 weeks earlier, and it seemed like her calendar notification settings hadn’t imported over. Apparently, she hadn’t really used the calendar at all over that time. Until today, that is, when she had downloaded the syllabi for her course load and gone to add key dates for the semester. That was when she had realized she had missed her window for her depo injection by just over three weeks.

This was bad. She was too old to be this careless about birth control. She had just paid her tuition for this semester’s classes. She’d cut back to part time at the bar. Drake’s job paid okay, but this was absolutely not a good time for them. But she also felt weird even thinking about ending a pregnancy when she and Drake had recently had the “kid talk” and said they want children in the future. He wasn’t some random one-night stand. She wasn’t seventeen anymore. Their relationship was in a good spot. Things felt stable. Why did she have to go and fuck all that up?

She didn’t know what to do, what to think, how to feel. Kids with Drake was a someday thing. A down the road a bit thing. Not a now thing. They hadn’t even been together a year, and she might be pregnant. All because she forgot to go in for her depo. They’d been essentially trying for three weeks without even knowing. And because she hadn’t had a period for the past few months on the depo, she didn’t even know how to judge if she was late or anything.

Trying to calm herself down, she sat up, leaning forward and hugging her knees. Even in her panic, she was able to recognize that part of her dread came from the fear of the unknown. That much, at least, she could take care of. So she grabbed her purse and marched down the stairs, outside and over to the little drug store a block over. She grabbed the first pregnancy test she saw, paid for it, and went back home, ready to do what needed to be done. But she couldn’t. She just stood in front of the mirror, staring at herself, trying to will herself to just pee on the goddamn stick. But she felt locked and frozen, unable to take that final step.

She didn’t know how long she stood in the bathroom, but eventually, she heard the front door unlock and Anderson’s tags jangling as his little feet pattered across the floor. Drake was home. And she should probably tell him what was going on.

“Hey, Liu!” he called out, “What do you want for dinner? I was thinking maybe…” but he trailed off when he saw the look on her face as she walked down the hallway and joined him in the kitchen. “What’s wrong?”

“Drake, I…” she paused, taking a deep breath before she continued, “I forgot to schedule an appointment with my OBGYN.”

“Okay…”

“For my depo injection.”

“Oh.” Drake nodded slowly, like doing so would help him process the information.

“And I was supposed to get one over three weeks ago.”

Drake kept nodding slowly. “Okay… so you’re saying that?”

“That I very well could be pregnant, Drake. And it’s freaking me out.”

Drake just kept nodding, like he was a fucking bobblehead doll or something. It was annoying the shit out of her.

“Don’t you have any thoughts on this?” she ground out, frustrated at… well basically everything. Drake. Herself. That they were even having to deal with this at all.

“I think… you should take a pregnancy test before we do anything else. Do you want me to go pick one up?” His voice was calm and steady, but it felt like he hadn’t really processed, almost as if he had no reaction to the fact that she could be pregnant with his kid.

Riley wanted to scream and shake his shoulders. It was like she’d told a robot she could be pregnant. “I already went and bought one.”

“Okay, well then I think you should take it.”

“How are you so fucking calm about this?”

Drake just stood there for a second before giving her a little shrug. “I don’t know. I mean, it could be worse, right?”

“How could it be worse? We live in a one bedroom apartment in a mad expensive city where we just paid a bunch of money for my tuition and you work as a temp and I’m a fucking bartender and-”

“Shhhh, Riley. Come here,” Drake said, stepping forward and wrapping his arms around her. “First of all, we don’t even know if you’re pregnant. Second of all, I guess I don’t see it as that big-”

“Oh, that’s easy for you to say! It’s not you that might be pregnant!”

“Yeah, but this would be our kid. I guess I just feel like we could handle it, you know?”

“A kid is a huge fucking deal, Drake! Pregnancy is a huge fucking deal before the kid even gets here! And I get that for the guy it doesn’t seem like it. And you can act like it’s no big deal and we’ll just figure it out, but that’s because you aren’t facing the reality that you might have a baby growing inside you that you were not planning on. So, don’t you dare try and minimize this, Drake Walker.”

Part of her knew she wasn’t being fair to Drake. She’d been processing this possibility all afternoon. She’d just unloaded on him and expected him to react the same way she did. But a big part of her was just frustrated that he didn’t seem as worried or scared as her. Regardless of her storm of emotions though, her little rant somehow focused her. Taking a deep breath, she turned around and headed back toward the bathroom. She might as well get this over with.

“Riley, wait! Can’t we talk about this?” Drake called out. She spun to face him, throwing her hands in the air.

“I have to go pee on a fucking stick. And according to you, there’s nothing to discuss until I do that.”

Marching into the bathroom and slamming the door, she let out a deep breath as she scanned the instructions on the little purple box she’d left on the counter. It made it sound so fucking simple, like this wasn’t mad terrifying. She popped open the box, and pulled out a thin piece of white plastic. How could something so tiny be so fucking intimidating?

Somehow, she kept her hand steady as she did what she needed to do, setting the little stick on the side of the sink before she washed her hands. She let out one last sigh before opening the door and leaving the bathroom, setting the timer on her phone for five minutes as she walked back towards their kitchen and living room. She found Drake sitting at the table, hands lightly tapping in his lap as he glanced around the room. When he noticed her approaching, he seemed to hold his breath for just a moment. Eventually, he broke the silence as she sat down in her usual chair.

“So, did you…?”

“Pee correctly? Yes, Drake. I managed to do that.”

He didn’t acknowledge her sarcasm, instead he just nodded twice before he asked, “How long do we have to wait?”

“Five minutes,” Riley responded, waving her phone in the air before setting it down on the table.

“Look, I’m sorry, Riley. I didn’t mean to make you think this isn’t a big deal to me. Because it is. All I was trying to say is that I think we can get through whatever happens here together.”

Riley nodded, but didn’t say anything. Deep down, she knew that was what he’d been trying to convey. But at the same time, she was freaking out. An unplanned pregnancy was just different for her, the person whose body would have to go through all the changes, than for him. “I know, Drake. And I know I just kind of dumped all my stress onto you and didn’t really give you any time to think or react.”

They were both silent for a few moments before Drake leaned over towards her. “No matter what it shows, you know I’m not going anywhere, don’t you?” he asked, reaching for her hand across the table. “We’ll be alright. We’ll figure it out. I can get a second job on nights and weekends if we need more money. And we probably won’t need a bigger place for a year or two. We can just shove this table against the wall by the kitchen, and then we can fit in a crib and a changing table, so we’d be set there for a while, and I know next semester might not be doable for you, depending when you’re due, but we’ll just have to see, right?”

“Drake…” Riley said, but he was just rambling off plans now, seemingly oblivious to her interruption.

“I know it’s a little earlier than expected, but this was always the plan, right? I mean, we talked a while back, and you said you saw us getting married and having kids. So what if it’s a little quicker than we thought? It’ll be fine. And I know there’s a lot to think about, but I figure we can still have a nice, little wedding. Unless you want some big, fancy wedding. If you do, that’s fine, we are just gonna have to start-”

“Woah, what the fuck are you talking about?” Riley finally said, squeezing his wrist tightly to interrupt his ramble.

“I’m just trying to figure some stuff out for us, you know?”

“Like our wedding?”

A faint blush crept onto Drake’s cheeks, but it didn’t stop him. “Well… yeah? I mean, obviously I want you to-”

“Drake, are you kidding me?”

“No, I’m serious. We can get married and-”

“No!” she called out, cutting him off before he could start rambling again.

“What?”

“Well, for one, you haven’t asked me yet!”

Drake winced at that but nodded and let out a little sigh, “You’re right. Sorry… just, lots of thoughts… but I should’ve… Shit, what I mean is… Riley, will you marry me?”

Riley was sure her eyes had never been wider than they were as she stared across the table. After a few seconds, she finally felt able to speak. “You did not just propose to me because I might be pregnant.”

“It’s not just because you might be pregnant,” Drake muttered, rubbing his hand along the back of his neck.

“Bullshit, Drake! Are you telling me that you planned on asking me to marry you when you got off work today?”

“No, of course not, but-”

“Then this,” she said, gesturing her hand back and forth between the two of them, “is all because you feel fucking obligated to propose. And I may not be big on over the top romance, Drake, but the thought of a man asking me to marry him out of a sense of duty is so not okay. I am not some fucking burden to be dealt with.”

“Hey! I never said that-”

“Drake, simply proposing because you feel like you are supposed to is mad insulting. Proposals should come when someone is sure they’re ready to commit to the rest of their lives with that one person. Not because they feel bad they might have knocked someone up.”

Drake swallowed roughly, and nodded at that. He didn’t say anything for a few tense moments, but then he stood up abruptly, shoving his chair back and stalking down the little hallway.

“Drake?” Riley called out, but all she got in response was a muffled “Just gimme a minute” from the bedroom. She glanced down at her phone, checking the timer.

“We only have a minute,” she muttered, shifting around in her chair. But a few moments later, Drake was striding back out towards her, one hand dragging through his hair, the other clutching something tightly in his fist.

“I didn’t ask you to marry me because I felt like I had to,” he growled out, dropping down on one knee next to her chair, “And I didn’t ask you because you might be pregnant. I asked you because I love you and I can’t picture my life without your teasing or swearing or jokes. Because I love that everything is a competition with you, and that you are a crazy sore loser and even worse winner. Because I love the way your eyes always show what you’re really thinking, whether you’re angry or protective or caring, not that they need to, because you have no problem telling me exactly what you think. And because for some strange reason, you seem to get me, and that makes me so fucking lucky.

“It’s not that I thought, ‘Oh, if she’s pregnant, I guess we better get married,’ but that I thought, ‘Why aren’t we married?’ Because whether it happens tomorrow or ten years from now, I know I want you to be the mother of my children. So yeah, maybe the timing is shit, and I know I’ve done this all wrong, but you were wrong too. Because I am ready to spend the rest of my life with you. I’ve been committed to that for a long time. And right now, I realized there is no good reason to wait. I don’t want to wait. So that’s why I asked you.”

He let out a couple of heavy breaths, just staring at her expectantly. Riley reached forward and grabbed his hand with both of hers, giving it a little squeeze as she found her voice. “Drake…”

“Shit,” he said as he tugged his hand out of her grasp, uncurling his fist and revealing a green, satin box, “I was probably supposed to show this to you earlier, too.” And with that he flipped the box open, revealing a beautiful, vintage, diamond ring.

“Holy shit,” Riley whispered, trying to keep up with everything that was unfolding, “You have a ring.”

“Yeah, I have a ring. Riley, I have known you were it for me for so long. So, let me-”

“Yes.”

“What?”

“Yes, I’ll marry you.” And with that, Riley leaned forward, sliding her hands around his neck and kissing him deeply. He responded passionately, tangling his fingers into her hair, but after a few seconds, a beeping noise interrupted them. Her phone alarm was chirping.

She turned slightly to silence her phone before facing Drake again, watching as he took her left hand off her lap and tugged it forward. She glanced up and found him staring at her, eyebrows raised, so she smiled and nodded. He grinned back at her before he slid the ring onto her finger. She felt like they had so many things to talk about, so many questions that needed to be asked and answered, but right now, there was one very pressing question with an answer waiting for them in the bathroom.

“Come on, Liu,” Drake said as he stood, tugging her to her feet with him, “It’ll be okay, no matter what. I promise.” So they walked hand in hand into the bathroom and looked at the piece of white plastic she’d left on the side of the sink. The piece of plastic that would shape their future.

“Two lines… does that mean…”

Riley shook her head, staring at the box. “No, that one is just the control. It’s only one line.”

“So, you’re not…”

“I’m not pregnant,” she said, feeling a rush of relief wash over her as she tugged Drake into a hug, “Thank God!”

It was like sheets of stress and panic were falling off her by the second, and she even let out a little chuckle of relief as she clung to Drake’s shoulders. Drake didn’t say anything, just loosely looping his arms around her waist to return the hug. When she pulled back after a moment, she saw just a hint of regret and sadness in his eyes.

“Drake, what is it?”

He just shook his head, “I don’t know. It’s just… a lot, I guess.”

She nodded, sliding her right hand forward to cup his cheek as she waved her left in front of his face. “Not second guessing this, I hope?”

He smiled warmly at her at that, clasping her hand against his cheek and tugging her hips flush against his, “No fucking way, Liu.”

“Good,” was all she said, before his lips were on hers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Riley had always wished she could find something in common with Savannah. She knew Drake wished that they were great friends, but the truth was they just were very different women. It’s not that Riley disliked Savannah, not really at least, but they almost never had anything to talk about. But now it seemed like they both had proposals triggered by pregnancy scares. It was a weird ass thing to share.

Except, they really weren’t all that similar. Savannah was not only actually pregnant, but she lived a life where the optics of it were far from ideal. If Riley had been pregnant back then, it would have been a lot to handle, but at the end of the day, Drake had been right. It would not have been a big deal. No one in New York would care if she and Drake, a committed couple who lived together, had a baby out of wedlock.

But for Savannah, it was different. Dukes weren’t supposed to live in sin. They certainly weren’t supposed to knock up the same woman twice, once as a one-night stand, once as a girlfriend. And as stupid as Riley found it, she knew that Savannah’s ramblings did express a very warranted fear. She and Bertrand could easily find themselves on the outside of their social group for this. Or rather, Savannah could. Bertrand might face some snide comments, but at the end of the day he was a man and he was one of them. Savannah had neither of those advantages. And while Riley and Drake had left that whole world behind for a lot of reasons, the fact remained that Savannah didn’t want to have to give that life up.

Lost in her thoughts, both her memories of her own proposal and her sympathy for Savannah, she was only half-listening to Drake and Savannah’s conversation, but when she heard her name and Drake’s tone turn suddenly angry, she snapped her head over, attempting to figure out what she’d missed.

“...Riley and I are getting married then! That’s our fucking wedding day, Sav. What the actual fuck are-”

“I know, Drake! If there was any other time that-”

“I’m not asking Riley that, Savannah. It’s not happening. You’re the one who wants a last minute wedding, you pick out a different day!”

“The Social Season already has events set for the next two months. The only exception is June 8th.”

“Yeah, because Liam blocked that weekend so he could come to our wedding! You’re just going to have to wait a couple of months.”

“I just want it to be believable that this is a honeymoon baby. People are already going to suspect, Drake. But if we just have a civil ceremony with none of court in attendance, people will know for sure.”

“Again, who the fuck cares?” Drake was clearly agitated now, pacing the kitchen and gesturing wildly.

“Bertrand’s a duke. We have to keep up appearances, at least a little. You don’t have to like it to know it’s true.”

Drake dragged a hand through his hair and let out a massive sigh, “What am I supposed to do here, Savannah? You realized this is an insane ask, right? I’m getting married in four weeks.”

“I know. If I could think of any other solution, I would. Just, talk to Riley about this, please? All I’m asking is that you two talk about it, okay?”

“Fine, Sav. But this is so out of line.”

“I know, I know.”

Drake ended the call without even saying goodbye to his sister. He slapped his hand over his eyes and let out a little growl.

“Soooooo,” started Riley, “Savannah and Bertrand are having another baby?”

He dropped his hand down and looked at her, just shaking his head. “I’m sorry you had to hear that. But you don’t need to worry about it. I’ll figure out how to tell Savannah she can’t just have our wedding weekend. How was your exam?”

“Fine, but Drake, we need to talk about your sister.”

“No, this is your day. You don’t need to worry about her drama. We’re celebrating you being a college graduate, and that’s all we need to do tonight.”

Riley shook her head, “Celebrating can wait a half hour while we figure this out.”

Drake gave her a frown and came to join her at the table. “What’s to figure out?”

“Drake, she’s pregnant, hormonal, and scared that she’s about to become a social pariah.”

“Yeah, but that’s not… I wouldn’t ask you to do what she’s asking. I wouldn’t expect you to postpone the wedding for that.”

She tilted her head forward, reaching out and grabbing his hand before she continued, “If this was just your event, if I wasn’t involved, you would agree wouldn’t you?”

“Well, yeah. But it’s not just my event.”

Riley stared at Drake for a few moments, running things through in her head. “How are you going to enjoy our wedding, knowing that it’s going to strain things between you and Savannah?”

“That’s the thing - it shouldn’t strain things between us. She’s being unreasonable here. We wouldn’t be doing anything wrong to get married as planned.”

“Oh, I completely agree. Savannah never should have called to ask you this. But the fact is that she did. And I don’t think you’re going to be able to just act like she didn’t.”

Drake sagged forward, propping one elbow on the table and catching his head with that hand as he squeezed her hand with his other. “I know I should just tell her ‘Hell no,” so that’s what I’m going to do. It’ll suck for a while, but she’ll get over it.”

Riley looked at Drake, trying so hard to steel himself, bracing to disappoint his baby sister. And a large part of her wanted him to do just that. Draw a clear line in the sand when it came to this. He already let her get away with so much. But a bigger part of her just felt for the woman that was going to be her family soon, who just felt scared and alone and was pregnant when she didn’t expect to be. And the biggest part of her just didn’t want Drake to be in this position, where he felt like he had to choose between her and his sister, even if his sister was mad out of line here.

“Drake, I think we should postpone our wedding.”

His head jerked up at that, fear and anxiety clear across his wrinkled brow and deep frown. Riley stood up and climbed into his lap, wrapping her arms around him and stroking the back of the neck and she worked to undo the worry and fears she knew her statement unleashed.

“And you know this has nothing to do with you or us or the way I feel about you. But you are a protector when it comes to those you love. And right now, you are trying to protect me from seeing how much you wish you could help your sister. And I appreciate that, but I know you, and if we get married on June 8th, I know that you are going to stew and feel guilty the entire time, even if you know you shouldn’t. And that’s not how our wedding should be.”

“Riley, I....” he sighed into her neck as his hands clutched at her waist. He didn’t say anything else, and Riley knew he was trying to find a way to contradict her. But he wasn’t going to be able to do that.

“It’s okay, Drake. I will be thrilled on our wedding day whether it’s in four weeks, four months, or four years. But your sister chose to be a part of a world that will judge her heavily if she gets married in four months or four years. We can help her by giving her the chance to get married in four weeks, and I don’t mind doing that, alright?”

Drake tipped his head back, sliding his hand up to comb through her hair. “I don’t know what to say, Riley.”

She leaned over and kissed his forehead. “Call your sister. Tell her she better start planning a wedding.��

“We’re going to lose a bunch of deposits.”

“I know. We’ll save up again. The benefit of a small, simple wedding is that it isn’t obscenely expensive.”

“I would never ask you to do this, Liu.”

“I know, because you take care of everyone whenever you can. But that mean you also want to take care of your sister, and I love that about you. So, let me take care of you here. This is my call. We are postponing.”

Drake crushed her against his chest as he hugged her tightly. Riley knew he was trying to convey a lot of things with his embrace that he couldn’t quite put into words. It just cemented her decision in her mind as the right call. As much as it would suck to postpone, starting out their marriage by making Drake do something that would hurt his sister was not the way to go about things. It didn’t matter that Savannah’s ask was way out of line. She and Drake could just afford to be flexible in ways that Savannah and Bertrand couldn’t.

“I love you,” Drake muttered into the skin of her shoulder before he loosened his grip on her, leaning back and looking up into her eyes, a clear mix of love, adoration, and regret present in his.

“I know. I love you, too. And I’ll love you whenever our time to get married comes.”

He kissed her gently. “It’ll be our time soon. I promise, Liu.”

Riley smiled, climbing off his lap and tugging him up after her, leading him by the hand into the kitchen, eager to get on with celebrating the end of her exams and to sample some of whatever Drake was in the midst of making. She wasn’t worried. They had a lifetime together. The when of their wedding didn’t matter as much as that fact.

Permatag: @walkerswhiskeygirl @riley--walker @bebepac @ravenpuff02 @oofchoices @octobereighth @drakewalker04 @kimmiedoo5 @mfackenthal @thequeenofcronuts

The Royal Romance/The Royal Heir: @ao719 @mskaneko @katedrakeohd @jovialyouthmusic @marshmallowsandfire @axwalker @kingliam2019 @sirbeepsalot @texaskitten30 @princessleac1 @ladyangel70 @dcbbw @yaushie

Drake x MC: @drakeandcamilleofvaltoria @iplaydrake @gibbles82 @drakewalkerisreal @notoriouscs @drakesensworld @drake-colt-lover-99

It Couldn’t Wait Another Moment: @thequeenchoices @sunnyxdazed

#drake walker #drake x mc #trr fanfic #trr au #trr #the royal romance #trr au fanfic

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worldoffae · 4 years

Text

My Small Joy - Rowaelin AU

A/N: Strap in cause chapter 3 is a long one. I feel like my biggest struggle is dialog and getting it to flow good so I hope this chapter turned out okay. Next chapter will be pretty steamy - so be ready. ;)

Story Rating: Explicit (brief mentions of sex)

Summary: Six months ago Aelin got the worst news of her life. She would never be able to get pregnant, to give birth to a baby that she so desperately wanted. Deciding that Aelin needs some fun in her life, Lysandra takes her out to a club where she meets the silver haired man of her dreams. A one-night stand takes a turn when 6 weeks later Aelin finds out she’s pregnant! Her world is turned upside down when she runs into him again at a coffee shop. Aelin tells him the truth and this handsome stranger tells her he wants to raise their baby together and she agrees.

Masterlist

Chapter 3:

The semester ended and just like that, Aelin was officially done with college. At least that was one less thing for her to worry about. Between working at the bookstore and trying to find an internship Aelin spent almost all of her free time with Rowan.

It had been six weeks since she found out she was pregnant and had run into him again. It had been six weeks of them slowly opening up to one another and telling each other secrets they had kept hidden for so long.

Aelin learned that outside of Rowan’s sexy and brooding exterior, he was actually incredibly kind and sweet. He was born in Ireland and lived there up until three years ago. When he was younger his father’s job would often send him to America to work so they would spend a few months of the year there before going home to Ireland.

He told her about his wife that was killed by a drunk driver. They had met in high school and dated throughout college before they got married. She was a month pregnant by the time they had their wedding. After she died, Rowan had spiraled for a couple of years. He sold their house and lived on his own in a shitty apartment. His friends, the people he currently worked with, had convinced him to come and work with them. Their company relocated them to New York and he’s been living here for the last three years.

He worked for a photography company. Rowan showed her some of his photos and he was pretty damn good.

Aelin spilled her guts about her own past. She was terrified he would decide he had made a mistake and would run out of her life. Besides Lysandra, her own friends didn’t know everything she had done. Not even Aedion. But Rowan took it in stride and held her hand through it all. He didn't judge her, just looked at her with understanding that she did what she had to to survive.

She lost her parents when she was twelve years old. The foster system had trouble contacting any known family since her aunt, Aedion’s mom, and her own mother weren’t on talking terms. So they placed Aelin in a group home that was under the careful watch of a now known criminal, Arobynn Hamel.

The group home is where she had met Lysandra and Sam. They got there about a year after she started living there. Arobynn trained Aelin to be a petty thief. Trained all of them. Told them that if they wanted to continue living in such a nice place with somebody that cared about them, they had to earn their keep. By the time Aelin turned 18 and was able to leave, she was scary good at stealing.

At first, she hated Sam and Lysandra. But she and Sam were the best at being criminals so they were often teamed up for jobs. And they ended up falling in love. He was a year older than her and was able to leave the home before she could. He went to academy to become a cop. He said he wanted to right all the wrong he was forced to do.

When Aelin turned 18, she moved in with Sam. Aelin worked at a disgusting bar illegally to help pay for the apartment. She and Sam talked about what their life would be like, about how much they loved each other and how excited they were for a day they could start their own family.

Sam was officially a cop and had begun working to uncover the truth about who Arobynn Hamel was. He was the lead officer in the bust that led to Arobynn being arrested. But Arobynn knew they were coming and put up a fight. Sam was shot and killed during the bust.

Aelin had sat up waiting for him to come home. It was around midnight that she got the call saying Sam had been fatally shot. She had fallen to her knees on the spot and screamed at what had been stolen from her. For what had been stolen from the nineteen year old that had his whole life ahead of him. She ended up robbing a pawn shop and stealing a gun. She was mad with grief and tried to break into the jail they were holding Arobynn at to kill him. She didn’t make it far before she was arrested.

Aelin ended up spending a few months in jail. Lysandra was the one that picked her up when she got out. She had heard about what happened to Sam and her. She offered Aelin a place to live. She said she didn’t want to hold onto the anger that was fed to them from Arobynn and Aelin agreed.

A few months later and Adeion had shown up at her doorstep. Her cousin had finally tracked her down and found out where she was. He moved into town and they got to know each other again.

She had never even told Chaol about going to jail. Once when they were dating he had locked himself out of his apartment. Aelin had picked the lock to open the door and he made it very clear that he wanted no part in any illegal activities. So she had kept her past hidden to him and he had never asked. No wonder their relationship crashed and burned.

A chime from her phone brought Aelin back to the present. She pulled it out of her pocket to find a text from Rowan.

Saw this and thought you might like it.

Attached was a photo of a small puppy with its butt in the air and paws splayed out in front of it, tongue hanging out while it stared at a caterpillar.

She felt her lips pull into a smile. She was beginning to form a reply of her own when she heard a familiar voice call her name.

“Aelin?”

She looked up from her phone to see Dorian walking towards her. His face brightened up when she saw him. Shit, she thought.

She hadn’t seen him since that party right after she and Chaol had broken up. When she had just found out the news that she wouldn’t be able to bear a child and had been a mess. They probably all thought she was broken over their break-up.

“Hey, Dorian. How are you?” she asked, trying to sound cheerful.

“I’m good. But, how are you? I haven’t seen you in forever. What’s it been, like half a year?” Dorian said. He leaned in and wrapped Aelin in a big hug.

“Yeah, something like that,” she forced out.

Dorian looked at her up and down and Aelin was grateful for the thick jacket she was wearing to ward off the cold January air. She was beginning to show a little and she wasn’t ready for that conversation.

His eyes softened as he said, “We all really miss you, Aelin.”

“I’m really sorry I haven’t been around. These last few months have been… difficult. I had some things I needed to work through.”

He nodded. “I get it. I’m actually having a birthday party tonight, if you’d maybe come? Aedion and Lysandra will be there. I had asked Lysandra to ask you to come but I had never heard back.”

Aelin opened up her mouth to make an excuse and realized she had none. “Um, yeah, I can try to be there.”

Dorian perked up a little at that and smiled at her. “Great. It’s at my place at 8.”

Aelin felt panic begin clawing its way through her chest at the thought of having to go alone. So she said, “Could I bring a friend?”

Surprise flashed across his face. “Yeah, that’s fine with me. It’ll just be the usual gang so the more the merrier.”

Aelin smiled a small smile and nodded. “Okay. I’ll see you tonight then. I gotta go though. Doctor’s appointment.”

They hugged again and went their separate ways.

Aelin pulled her phone out as she continued walking down the street and sent a text to Rowan.

Hey, how would you feel about going to a party with me tonight?

She watched the ellipses pop up as she opened the door to her doctor’s office and walked inside. A party? An odd request for somebody who can’t drink.

I couldn’t think of an excuse to get out of it. It’s for a birthday party. What do you say, Buzzard? You in?

“Your wish is my command,” a deep and accented voice said in her ear.

Aelin jumped at the sound of his voice. “Shit you scared me,” she said as she smacked Rowan’s arm.

He chuckled and walked with her as she got checked in at the front desk. They sat down and waited for her name to be called.

“I ran into Dorian on the way here,” Aelin said, her knee bouncing.

“Oh?” Rowan’s brows rose.

She nodded. “The birthday party is for him. I got a bit nervous about going by myself.”

A moment of silence passed between them before Rowan said, “Why not ask Lysandra or Aedion to go with you?”

“They’re already going to be there.” Rowan had already met the two of them and he and Aedion got along a lot better than Aelin thought they would. “You can say no to going, you know.”

“That’s not why I asked,” Rowan said softly when he noticed the change in Aelin’s tone. “Me being there will just bring up questions and I didn’t know if that was something you were ready for.”

Aelin took a deep breath. Rowan was just trying to be thoughtful. She needed to stop jumping to conclusions and assume he was trying to find an out. He had more than proven how badly he wanted this baby too.

So instead she shook her head and said, “I know. But I’d really like for them to meet you anyways. I’m going to have to come clean about this pregnancy at some point and that will just start the whole, ‘Well who’s the father?’ questions.”

“So I’m the one being outed now.” Rowan’s chuckle sent shivers down Aelin’s spine and she tried her best to keep it from showing.

“I’ll just introduce you as my friend. They don’t need to know that part yet. But I do miss them. And I don’t want to hide the shit I’ve been dealing with anymore.”

She felt Rowan’s gaze on her and she snuck a glance at him. There was a softness in his eyes and smile that had her breath catching in her throat. She had done her best to ignore the feelings he brought up in her. And she had caught him on more than one occasion giving her the same heated looks she gave him when he wasn’t looking to know he felt the same. The agreement was to get to know each other first. They had their baby to think about.

“Galythinius?”

Aelin tore her eyes from Rowan to look at the nurse that called her name. She stood up and Rowan did the same before they followed the nurse to her room. Aelin got settled on the bed and waited for the doctor.

“Hello. Are you Aelin Galythinius? I’m doctor Towers. It’s nice to meet you,” the doctor said. She was beautiful with her long, curly hair and golden skin. She gave Aelin a smile as she nodded.

“I know this pregnancy has been a bit scary so far. But today is a day to celebrate. You’re at 12 weeks so you're officially done with your first trimester! The chances for a miscarriage are much lower. Are you excited to see your baby today?” Doctor Towers asked as she set up the ultrasound machine.

“I am so excited. Still scared though.” Aelin blew out a breath and smoothed a hand over her small bump.

Dr. Towers glanced up beneath long lashes at Rowan before getting settled in her chair. “And are you the father?”

Rowan nodded and looked at Aelin. “Yes I am. And I am also very excited to see our baby today.” He took Aelin’s hand and smiled. Gods he was so handsome.

Dr. Towers nodded and put on her gloves. “Okay, let's get started then. If you could pull your shirt up a bit and unbutton your pants for me, Ms. Galythinius. Yes, that’s good, thank you. Now this is going to be cold.”

She squirted the ultrasound gel onto her stomach and Aelin flinched a litte. “Shit you weren’t kidding.”

Rowan chuckled and the doctor smiled. She put the wand against Aelin’s abdomen and Aelin squeezed her eyes shut as the doctor began moving it around to find the baby. She heard an intake of breath beside her and opened her eyes to find Rowan leaning down next to her. She saw tears begin forming in his eyes.

“Look, Aelin,” he breathed, his eyes not leaving the screen. “It’s our baby.”

Aelin tore her eyes away from him to look at the screen. She was too scared to look at first. She still felt like this was all some dream she would wake up from soon. But there on the screen was the small bean in gray and white. She couldn’t stop the tears from falling as she took in the tiny figure.

She pressed her shaking fingers against her lips and let out a little, “Oh. There it is.”

Rowan gently took her hand in his and squeezed. She could feel his own shaking like hers. He pressed a kiss to her forehead.

Dr. Tower’s froze the screen. “Your baby is looking very healthy. It looks like it’s right on track and there’s nothing to worry about. Just keep doing what you’re doing, okay? Would you like a picture to take home with you?” Aelin nodded so fast she thought she would give herself whiplash. “Can we have a few, please?” she whispered, her eyes still not leaving the screen.

The doctor smiled and nodded. “I can do that. I’d like to schedule you for a 16 week check up if that’s alright with you. Since this is a higher risk pregnancy I’d like to have you in for check ups more often than I usually would. I’ll meet you at the front with your pictures.”

Dr. Towers stood and handed Aelin a wipe for her stomach and left them to have a moment to themselves.

Aelin felt a sob work itself out of her throat and Rowan leaned his forehead against hers. She let herself lean into it, let herself breathe in his pine and snow scent to steady herself.

After a moment she looked up at Rowan’s face. She could see the tears and happy smile that lit up his face. “Our baby. I can’t fucking believe it,” she said, taking another shuddering breath.

“Our baby,” Rowan echoed.

Aelin laced her fingers with Rowan’s and smiled at him with no restraint. The pure happiness on his face was mirrored on hers and together they looked at the tiny bean that was their small joy.

-----

Hours later and Aelin found herself standing at Dorian’s apartment door. She was fiddling with the zipper of her jacket in anticipation of what was to come. Rowan slid a hand to her lower back and Aelin glanced up at him, grateful for the comfort.

Underneath she wore a red empire waisted dress. It stopped just above her knees and she wore a simple pair of flats. Her hair was half up and half down and it fell in loose waves. Rowan had let out a whistle of appreciation when he had picked her up at her apartment and she tried to hide her blush.

He wasn’t looking too shabby either in his dark green button down shirt and tight pants. Although he could be wearing a trash bag and still be hot as hell. She told him as much and that earned her a blush of his own.

Aelin took a steading breath and nodded before she knocked on the door. She felt Rowan’s hand fall from her back and she found herself missing the contact. But she straightened her spine and stood tall, trying for that old swagger that was slowly coming back to her.

The door swung open and Dorian’s wide grin met them. He faltered slightly when he took Rowan in beside her but recovered. “Aelin! Welcome! This must be your friend.” Dorian shook Rowan’s hand as he continued, “I’ll admit, though, that when Aelin asked if she could bring a friend I assumed it would be a woman.”

Aelin rolled her eyes as she nudged her way into the apartment. “Of course you did. Not getting laid enough these days, Dorian?”

Dorian let out a howl of laughter and shut the door behind them. “Everyone, Aelin’s here!”

They took off their coats and walked out of the entryway hall and into the living room. Seated on the loveseat were Aedion and Lysandra, smiles on both their faces as the latter waved at Aelin and Rowan. On the couch was Chaol and a beautiful woman with golden skin and thick, curly hair pulled up in a bun.

Aelin stopped dead in her tracks as she made eye contact with the woman. Recognition lit up her eyes as she noticed the two of them and Aelin’s eyes fell to Chaol and her hands intertwined. Shit shit shit.

Her doctor was Chaol’s new girlfriend.

Her hesitation went unnoticed by Dorian as he made introductions. “Aelin, this is Yrene. Yrene, this is Aelin. I’m really hoping Chaol told you about them having dated or this is about to be real awkward.”

Dr. Towers, or Yrene, tried to hide her amused smile. Aelin couldn’t help but let out a rasp of a laugh. She felt Rowan’s steading presence behind her and took a step forward so she didn’t lean into him.

“We’ve met actually. She’s my new OBGYN.”

Chaol’s eyes widened in surprise as he looked between his girlfriend and his ex.

Yrene nodded in confirmation. “It seems this was always going to be a little awkward at first, huh?” Amusement lit her eyes as she looked at Chaol and back at Aelin.

Oh, Aelin liked this woman.

Chaol turned his eyes to Rowan. He looked like he was about to say something when Dorian interrupted. “And this is… I actually never got your name,” he said, gesturing to Rowan.

Rowan stepped up to Aelin’s side and extended his hand to Dorian and then Chaol. “I’m Rowan. I’m Aelin’s friend.”

She could see how the three others looked at Rowan with questions on the tip of their tongues. Aelin hadn’t come around in seven months and all of a sudden she brought a guy friend with her. She would be curious too.

“An accent,” Dorian said, waggling his eyebrows. “What is that, Scottish?”

“Irish, actually,” Rowan answered. He didn’t supply any more information and silence fell.

“What’s up, man,” Aedion said, breaking the awkward tension. He stood and pulled Rowan into a half hug and clapped him on the back. They said their greetings and Lysandra came up and said hi, smiling and batting her eyelashes at him. Aedion grumbled and Aelin laughed.

“There’s beer in the fridge if you want one,” Aedion said to Rowan, walking into Dorian’s kitchen and helping himself. Rowan gave Aelin a look and shrugged before he followed suit. Aelin tried to hide her smile and failed.

Dorian stood for another second before he seated himself next to Chaol on the couch. Lysandra sat in her spot again and Aelin took a seat on the floor in front of the coffee table.

“I can go grab a chair for you, A,” Dorian said quickly, starting to get up. “I didn’t know if you were going to be able to make it so I didn’t grab it earlier, but-”

Aelin shook her head and he stopped. “I’m okay here.”

Dorian looked unsure but sat down again.

Chaol was the one to speak next. “So, what have you been up to, Aelin? We haven’t seen you since…” he trailed off, looking like he was unsure if he should continue.

Aelin rolled her eyes. “Since shortly after we broke up. You can say it, Choal. And before either of you two try asking,” she said with a pointed look at Dorian and Chaol, “no, I wasn’t a mess last time you saw me because I was hung up on Chaol.”

Dorian leaned forward at that. “Then what was it? Like, shit, A. You two break up and then we see you a month after it and you’re drunk off your ass and tell us all to stop asking you what was wrong. What else were we supposed to think?”

Rowan and Aedion had walked back in as Dorian started talking and they took their respective seats, Rowan sitting down next to Aelin.

Aelin took a deep breath, preparing herself for the conversation she had been dreading. She hated being open and vulnerable.

She felt Rowan’s knee brush against hers as he readjusted himself. She knew it was intentional. To remind her that he was beside her.

“I was a mess at that party because I had just had a doctor’s appointment where I was told I would never be able to get pregnant.”

She watched as Dorian and Chaol’s faces fell. Chaol opened his mouth to say something but Aelin held up a hand.

“Clearly, I didn’t handle the news well. But I should have been honest with you guys instead of pushing all of you away. I realized that and I’m really sorry for doing that.”

Both of them shook their heads. “Aelin,” Dorian said. “You don’t need to apologize. Yes, I think both Chaol and I both would have appreciated it, but you don’t owe us anything. But I wish we could have been there for you.”

Aelin nodded, looking down at the table where her hands were crossed. She pulled them off the table and into her lap as they started shaking. “There’s more. Another reason I realized I didn't hide from you guys anymore, no matter how awkward it would be to have to explain everything.”

She looked up and held her chin high as she pulled the ultrasound picture out of her pocket. She saw Lysandra sit up abruptly out of the corner of her eye and could hear her intake of breath. She hadn’t told them she was getting her first scan today.

Aelin watched as Chaol and Dorian sat forward to get a better look at the picture. Their jaws went slack when they realized what it was. Their eyes shot up to Aelin’s.

“I’m twelve weeks pregnant today,” she said.

“Shit, A,” Dorian breathed. His face broke out in a huge grin. “That’s amazing!” He hesitated. “It is amazing, right? You’re happy?”

This time Aelin didn’t try to hide her smile as her eyes fell back onto the photo. “Yes,” she breathed. “I’m very happy.”

“I’m so angry you didn’t tell me you got your scan today,” Lysandra said, picking up the ultrasound picture. “But I’m so happy for you, Aelin. Does this mean I can finally start buying baby things?”

Aelin laughed and shook her head. “Soon. Not quite yet.”

Lysandra huffed in annoyance but the smile didn’t leave her face as she handed it to Aedion. She saw the tears well up in his eyes but he didn’t say anything as he handed it back. She knew that would come when they had a moment alone. Neither of them were fans of crying in public.

“I have to ask,” Dorian finally said, his eyes darting to Rowan and back to Aelin. “But who’s the father?”

“Why is that important?” Aelin asked. She knew this question was going to come but gods, she really didn’t want to explain how it had happened to them.

“Because you just told us that you lost your shit after you found out you couldn’t get pregnant, then tell us that by some miracle you are, and you brought your ‘friend’,” Dorian used air quotes for the word friend, “to my party. One can only assume.”

Aelin opened her mouth, trying to think of an excuse to deny it, when Lysandra chimed in. “No, don’t you dare, Aelin. I know you’re going to try and come up with some lame excuse so you can save yourself the embarrassment, so let me do it for you.” She turned to everyone else. “Aelin needed to get laid so I took her to a club where she fucked Rowan in the bathroom.”

Rowan choked on his beer and flushed while Aelin cried in outrage, “Lysandra!”

She threw her hands up. “What?” she said. “It’s true and I don’t want any more secrets.”

Rowan chuckled. “She’s not wrong.”

“That doesn’t mean you have to agree with her,” Aelin said in exasperation, swatting his muscled arm. Rowan chuckled again and grabbed her hands in his to get her to stop hitting.

Chaol spoke this time. “So you two are just friends?”

She could see the questions in his eyes. That he could see that answer for the lie it was. Before she might have interpreted it as him being jealous. But she could see how relaxed he seemed around Yrene, their hands still intertwined. She could see now that they had both moved forward and were maybe at the point where they could try to be friends again.

“For now, yes,” Rowan answered for her. Aelin’s head whipped in his direction.

Choal looked at Rowan for a beat before he nodded. He smiled. “I’m happy for you guys. This is really great, Aelin.”

Aelin looked back at Rowan and smiled, her hand smoothing over her stomach for the thousandth time that day. “Yes, it really is.”

-----

Rowan walked Aelin back to her apartment door. They got to her door and Aelin unlocked it but made no move to open it. She wasn’t quite ready to say goodnight yet.

“What did you mean when you said that we’re just friends ‘for now’?” she asked.

Rowan smiled slightly, lifting a hand to tuck some hair behind her ear. His fingers grazed against her cheek and her eyes fluttered at the small touch.

“I meant,” he rumbled, “that I know we agreed to get to know each other and take things slow for the sake of our baby. But I also had every intention of asking you out on a date tonight.”

Aelin didn’t think she was breathing. “And now?”

“And now,” he said, stepping closer so they were sharing breath, “ that I still have every intention of doing just that. So, would you want to go out on a date with me tomorrow night?”

Aelin had to tilt her head up to look him in the eye. She could see the mischief dancing there. But she could also see the hope there.

Aelin smiled at him. “I’d love to.”

Rowan’s eyes dropped to her lips and she tracked the movement. She saw a slight blush grace his cheeks and he swallowed hard, his adam’s apple bobbing. She tracked that movement too.

So she leaned up on her toes and let her lips graze his cheek. “I’ll see you tomorrow night, Buzzard.”

Rowan let out a breathy chuckle that had Aelin involuntarily leaning into his warmth. She felt his hand gently grasp her hip and she pulled back. She flashed him another dazzling smile and winked at him before she opened the door and stepped inside, shutting the door in his face.

#tog #throne of glass #rowan whitethorn #aelin galythinius #rowan x aelin #rowaelin #rowaelin au #my writing #my small joy #fanficion #fanfic #pregnancy au

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kuratoki · 4 years

Text

Changes FINAL

THIS IS THE END!! It feels so good to be done with this ^_^ I hope you all enjoyed it and I would love to know what you guys think :) Thank you to the Anons for cheering me up when I was burning out and thank you to someone for letting me blurb all the ideas for Distance to you. I should be posting the first part in the coming days so make sure you look out for it!

Changes Masterlist

Do you agree that things change in time? Well four years abroad would tell wouldn’t it?

Pairing: Reader x Jeno ft. NCT`

Words: 4025

Warning: Swearing

It had been a week. A week since you got back from your bonding weekend with Jisung and Mia, a week since Jeno told you off in front of almost everyone at the airport, a week since you’ve spoken a word to him. Worst of all, a week since you told your third period instructor that you weren’t going to be able to complete the term project for some unknown reason but apparently, the instructor had seen it coming and allowed Jeno to perform the term project solo.

He wasn’t going to admit it but he was jealous seeing the Instagram posts with Jisung. He was upset that you decided to get on a plane and spontaneously fly somewhere with someone he didn’t know and someone he didn’t completely trust. Granted it wasn’t a twelve hour flight but still. You didn’t tell him and that upset him. Was he being childish? Maybe. So here he was, in one of the schools practice rooms, wallowing in his thoughts instead of practicing his solo piece he’d have to present instead of with you.

“You know, the mirror might break if you continue glaring at it.” Jaemins voice came from the door and Jeno turned to see him, Renjun and surprisingly Yukhei watching him with interest. He was used to seeing Yukhei around at this point. Renjun said that he had made amends with you and him in the last few days and Yeeun was also slowly becoming part of your girlfriend circle.

“Shouldn’t you be with your girlfriends right now?” he asked trying not to sound bitter and the group of boys only laughed at him as they walked in.

“They’re all out with Y/N and Jisung grabbing dinner. So we thought we would have this little intervention and ask…” Yukhei started gently but Renjun cut him off.

“What the fuck is wrong with you idiot!!?” he exclaimed, “I know you and I are working on a friendship right now but Y/N is still my best friend and comes first!”

“Renjun, calm down.” Jaemin said being the only rational one, “We just want to know what’s up and why you yelled at her in front of all of us at the airport that day only to drop her off at her house and not speak to her for like the whole week.”

“I would rather not talk about it.” Jeno muttered with a huff, “It’s none of your business anyways.”

“That’s kind of where you’re wrong.” Renjun corrected, “You’re upset that she hopped on a plane without telling you again right?”

“How are you NOT upset that your girlfriend did that?” Jeno shot back and Renjun shrugged casually knowing that his assumption was right. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure it out.

“Cause it’s typical Y/N and Mia.” he said as if that explained everything, “I warned you about their friendship, how they can be spontaneous from time to time. Heck, Y/N and Mia used to disappear for days when we had our breaks without telling anyone but they post on their social media to show that they’re okay. Jeno, they went to Ireland in the middle of the season for no reason but to take pictures once. Xander and I were about to have a heart attack!”

“Guy’s Jeno’s not only upset about that okay.” Jaemin said, “It’s Jisung too right?” he asked his best friend, “The fact that Jisung was with them the whole weekend and you don’t know what happened or what they talked about. They came out of the terminal arm in arm with Mia and you blew up on Y/N without a greeting. It was obvious.”

“He’s also lucky Yuta and Sicheng were there to hold Jisung back from smoking Jeno in the face.” Yukhei commented, “I would’ve done the same thing.”

“You hit me in the eye.” Renjun reminded him, “Anyways, you should know that Mia was the one who suggested they go to Japan. Y/N and Jisung went along with it.”

“You should also know something else.” Jaemin said and looked at the other two who nodded, Jaemin was going to tell Jeno because he was the only one who would be able to calm him down if he got angry, “What you’re doing right now...is all according to Jisungs plan.”

Jenos head shot up, “Excuse me?” What plan did Jisung have?

“What do you think you’re doing right now?” Jaemin asked, “You’re literally pushing Y/N towards Jisung by not talking to her. By not talking to her, she’s starting to lean on someone else because she’s confused. She’s tried to talk to you multiple times right? She never got mad at you when you yelled at her in front of everyone and she apologized to you but you ignored her.”

Jeno stayed silent knowing that what came out of Jaemin’s mouth was the truth. You didn’t get angry at him, you tried for three days to talk to him but he kept brushing you off. Leaving for school later so you wouldn’t run into each other and ignoring you during your shared classes. It wasn’t until the third day he realized that you stopped trying all together. Suddenly, everywhere you were, Jisung was too. In the library where you worked, the practice room when you and Renjun would fool around with Mia, Jisung was always there.

Jaemin let out a sigh at his best friend's silence, “Listen...Hana had a talk with Jisung earlier this week and I’m not even supposed to tell you about this. She found out that he applied for the study abroad program the day Renjun and Y/N got the offer. He had no interest in the Selects team until Y/N mentioned that there was a high chance of her going back.” Jaemin let out a breath, “Jeno, I really don’t think Jisungs feelings for Y/N are as platonic as he claims they are.”

“What are you talking about? This whole time he’s been trying to push me towards Y/N. What does he have to gain now?” Jeno asked in disbelief. He was already wary of the boy but the things Jaemin said didn’t make sense.

“A lot.” Yukhei said, “If you really want proof, ask yourself this. If Y/N was faced with a difficult situation right now at this very moment, who would she turn to? You? Or Jisung? If she ended up in the hospital right now, who would she go to for comfort? You or Jisung?”

Before Jeno could answer, Renjun’s cellphone went off and he was quick to answer it.

“Hey babe.” he said into the receiver and the four boys could pick up a hints of distress in Mia’s voice and Renjun let out a sigh before throwing a glare at Jeno, “Is she okay? Okay and which hospital are they taking her to?”

“Hospital?” Jeno whispered, his eyes shot to Renjun but he was no longer paying attention to anything since he was busy getting up and seemed to be in a rush.

“Hana, Yeeun and Jisung are still with you right? Okay, Then you’ll be fine. I’m on my way now, tell the Doctors I can tell them everything they need, be it over the phone or when I get there. Call your Mom and let her know too okay?” he said in a soothing voice, “For fuck sakes Y/N” he muttered to himself, “I knew I should’ve made you stay home this week.” he shook his head as the three others watched him with concern, knowing the phone call was about you, “I’ll be there in twenty tops. Okay, love you too.”

After hitting the end button, Renjun let out a huge sigh and turned to glare at Jeno, “You are a fucking moron. I can’t believe my girlfriend supports a guy like you in Y/N’s life. I can’t believe I supported you! If it were me, Jisung would’ve been a better fit. At least he doesn’t over react over stupid shit.”

“What’s going on with Y/N?” Jaemin asked as Jeno tried to find the words to speak but the words Y/N and hospital seemed to freeze him in time.

“She collapsed when they were leaving dinner. Actually straight collapsed, she didn’t fall or anything cause Jisung caught her in time. I have to go to the hospital because I’m apparently the emergency contact on her file for fuck knows why but at least I know her medical history.” Renjun explained and let out a huff, “You guys can tell this stubborn asshole the rest but I gotta go.” He looked at Jeno once more and if looks could kill, “Don’t show up at the hospital. She’s going to be too weak to even deal with you. Take this as a warning or I’ll really let my fury off on you.” and with that, Renjun flew out the door literally leaving the three boys in silence, “WONG YUKHEI I SWEAR YOU ARE A CURSE”

Jaemin, who had received a text from Hana sighed, confirming Renjuns explanation. “Jeno…’ he put his hand on his best friends leg, “Y/N’s leaving after the Christmas party this weekend...She decided to go early instead of waiting till the New Year…” Jaemin said softly and hesitated to continue when he felt Jeno tense under him. Looking at Yukhei, he silently asked for reinforcement, “It’s been decided that Jisung and Mia are going to go with her.”

“What the fuck?!” Jeno suddenly said springing up causing the two boys to jump slightly, “Jisung wasn’t supposed to leave until next Semester.”

“He’s going to finish his classes online and his instructors gave him the okay to take off early. As of next week, Y/N and Jisung are both gone for the next six months.” Jaemin stated, “It could’ve been prevented too, if you actually TALKED to her.”

“Dude, I know I may have a sketchy past with Y/N but Jaemins right...the way Jisung is around her, is too much for something platonic.” Yukhei said, “You need to talk to Y/N, tell her how you really feel. I know you guys confessed to each other but make her yours, OFFICIALLY. Tell her about how you feel with Jisung around.”

This suddenly made Jeno agitated, extremely agitated. He trusted Jisung, he was so supportive of the two of you up until now and he wondered what changed. Where did things go wrong? Or was Jisung playing this whole time? With both of you? You were supposed to be with him, that’s how it was supposed to end. He saw you first, you were his childhood friend, you were his first love...and plus, you didn’t like Jisung that way did you? After all the conversations you had, he assumed Jisung was nothing but a brother to you, but he knew that there was a chance that his feelings changed.

Unfortunately, a lot of his thoughts he thought he was keeping in his head actually came out and Jaemin had to resist the urge to slap his best friend on the head.

“It doesn’t matter if you saw her first, you idiot. He’s going to be there with her physically while you’re a twelve hour plane ride away. You trust her...but do you trust him” Jaemin said getting up, “FYI, Y/N’s getting discharged from the hospital. She had a high fever and her iron levels dropped beyond normal so she’s in a weak state. This is your last chance, you have one week to talk to her because I know for a fact Jisung won’t let her change her mind on leaving early. Like I said, it was all part of his plan. He knows you Jeno, he beat you at your own game.”

“And in the end, only one of you can have Y/N and unlike Renjun, I think you two suit each other quite well.” Yukhei commented, “But it’s on you to make things right. She’s in the hospital BECAUSE of you.”

“What do you mean because of me?!” Jeno asked, furrowing his eyebrows and clenched his fists, “I literally haven’t talk to her all week. You know this.”

“Yea...but she also waited for you outside your place in the rain for four hours when you decided to avoid your house for a while. Yuta told me.” Jaemin snorted, “With the stress from her current responsibilities, the argument you started and having to deal with a lost loved one, her immune system probably screwed her over and she got sick.”

“She..she waited outside my house for me?” Jeno whispered, eyes wide, feeling guilty. He had no idea.

“Why do you think Renjun has been such an ass to you? Mia, her mom and Jongin are all staying at Y/N’s house until they have to leave again. Mia and Renjun tried to convince her to go inside after an hour but she was adamant...she wanted to fucking talk to you Jeno. She really tried and you blew her off.” Yukhei said shaking his head, “Yeeun tried to get her to go home on multiple occasions today but she kept insisting she was fine. She threw herself into her work because the one person that she wanted to lean on decided to ignore her. Now she suffers the consequences.”

“And Jisung…” Jeno whispered, “I have to go…”

“I’ll see if Hana or Chenle can distract Jisung for a while.” Jaemin said pulling out his phone, he knew what Jeno was feeling, Despite him being an ass to you all week, Jeno actually had a strong guilty conscience which was why Yukhei said what he had to say, “Just don’t fuck it up.”

“I wont.” Jeno promised and ran out of the room and towards the direction of your houses.

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“Guys I’m fine!” Jeno heard you say and assumed that you had people smothering you, “I just need to breath. Take a break AND GO TO SLEEP!”

The more you talked, the louder your voice got and soon the door opened and you walked through, almost slamming it shut. Noticing the extra occupant in the room you groaned. That wasn’t the reaction he was expecting.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” you asked tiredly placing a hand on your forehead, “Please...just leave...I’m tired, I’m sick, I just need to be alone and you being here isn’t helping.”

“I-” Jeno tried to speak but you continued your ramble, abruptly cutting him off.

“I don’t care if you take the door or the window. I just need to be alone and away from you.” you grumbled, leaning against the door where you felt another headache coming on and covered your face with your hands. Why were the lights in your bedroom so bright?

Instead of speaking, Jeno got up from your bed and gently grasped your wrist, pulling you into his embrace. You were too weak to fight him off and the scent that you missed for the past week invaded your senses.

“I’m sorry.” he whispered, burying his head in your air, inhaling your sweet scent, “I...I was jealous…”

“Why would you be jealous? You started hanging out with my friends the moment you met them.” you grumbled weakly, trying to pull away but Jeno was too strong and held you in place, “But the moment I go somewhere with Jisung and Mia you have a freak out.”

“You didn’t tell me.” he emphasized, “You got on a plane without a message, call, smoke signal...do you understand how scared I was?”

“Mia’s mom, Jongin, Yuta and Sicheng knew.” you muttered weakly, “If I told you, you would have insisted to come with us. Why do you think Mia didn’t tell Renjun? Same reason.”

“Why though?” he asked, letting out a breath, “Why was it so important to go with just the two of them?”

“It’s Mia’s way of getting to know someone personally. She’s going to be helping run training camp and she wanted to get to know Jisung. Taking him to Japan, putting him out of his comfort zone was the best way to do it.” you explained, “The only other time they met was this past summer when she came to visit me with Xander and Jisung was taking care of me. Jisung and Xander spent almost the whole night talking and I guess Xander told her good things and she wanted to find out if everything Xander told her was true.”

“Were they? Was she happy?” Jeno asked.

“Jeno...I have a headache, a fever and I feel like I’m about to pass out again. Why are you asking me all these questions?” you asked, your voice getting weaker and Jeno could feel your body sway so he held you tighter.

“I just…” he hesitated for a second and let out a sigh, burying his face into your hair, “I just don’t want to lose you to him.” he muttered, “I don’t know how he feels about you and the fact that you guys are so close bothers me…I already lost you once Y/N and you’re leaving again...I just...I know a lot of things happened in the last few weeks and I know I was an idiot for blowing up and ignoring you...but I really don’t want to lose you...to him or anyone else.”

His answer shocked you. The Jeno you knew was confident and sure of himself but the Jeno in front of you right now was vulnerable. In your lifetime of friendship, you had only seen this side of him as a child and when he got older, he got a lot better at hiding his emotions in front of people, including you.

You felt yourself wrap your arms around his waist and nuzzled into his chest. You were exhausted and even though you were annoyed with him, you were leaving soon and a staying mad wouldn’t solve anything.

“I don’t want to lose you either.” you muttered against his chest but he was lucky he heard it as you felt your legs go weak, “I need to…” you let out a shaky breath and Jeno picked you up bridal style, placing you gently on your bed.

“Rest.” he said gently, pulling the covers over you. “I’ll go get you some stuff and come right back okay?” You were sick and knowing that you were going to leave in a few days, he wanted to be the one to take care of you. He wouldn’t let Jisung, even if he tried.

“Are you going back to your house?” you asked weakly, looking up at him as he nodded, “Can you bring Nal then? I could use some kitty cuddles.”

“How about you stay home tomorrow and spend the day at my place? No ones going to let you go to classes anyways and then you can cuddle all three.” Jeno suggested, “Would Jeno cuddles work for tonight?”

“Only if you never refer to yourself in third person again.” you answered tiredly, “Come back soon…”

“Close your eyes and I’ll be back before you know it.” he said placing a kiss on your forehead and really feeling your temperature and was shocked to see how hot you had gotten.

Leaving your room, he was unsurprised to run into Mia and Anne-Marie who had a basin of water and a face cloth in her arms. Items he was just about to get. The two smiled at him and gave him some medicine along with the basin.

“Thank you for letting me in.” he said to Anne-Marie who had been at home when he got to your house, “How did you manage to keep the guys away?”

“Renjun knows you’re here but won’t try anything. Chenle reminded Jisung that he had to pack everything for his semester abroad so that’s what they’re doing now. Just try to be asleep by the time they get back so they can’t do anything.” Mia suggested, “Y/N has to head into the city tomorrow night to finalize the Christmas party stuff so she needs all the rest she can get.”

“I’ll drive her. I know you guys all want to stay at the hotel where the Christmas party is being held but I’d like to take her to my place which is near the venue if that’s okay.” Jeno said, he already asked for permission to take an extra day off school for the event, “I’m not ready to let her go yet…Also, thank you for letting the NCT Club members attend your Christmas party.”

“Jongin is an alumni of that club and you’re going to be one of us soon anyways.” Anne-Marie said giving Jeno a motherly hug, “And that’s completely fine with us. We understand that letting her go won’t be easy but think about it, you’ll be seeing us sooner than you think.”

“Then...I guess I’ll get back to her then.” Jeno said and gave the two a slight bow, “Thank you again.” he then disappeared into your bedroom, with his hands full, he couldn’t shut the door and it gave Mia and Anne-Marie a clear view of his affection towards you.

“You know Mia, I have never met two people in my life as young as you who have remained so devoted to the other regardless of distance…it really must be the stars” Anne-Marie said with a smile, watching Jeno soak the face cloth, dabbing your face with it before repeating the process and placing it on your forehead.

“I agree Mom, maybe Xander was right...Jisung might be a good dance partner for her but her heart always belonged to Jeno.” Mia agreed and she gently shut the door to give you some privacy.

A few hours later, Jeno heard the sound of a door opening and a slight gasp. Judging by the voice it had to have come from Jisung. He popped one eye open and his suspicions were confirmed. He saw the look of shock and then annoyance cross the other boys features and held in his snicker, pretending to sleep. When he heard the door shut, Jeno shifted and smiled, feeling your arm tighten around his stomach area. He could still feel your temperature was high but he had you in one of his hoodies and a really thick blanket so you could sweat the sickness out.

Closing his eyes once more, he pulled you tighter against him and felt you snuggle into his chest. He would have to wake you up later to change but for now, the best thing was for you to rest.

In the coming days, you would have to leave but in the coming months, he would see you again. It wasn’t going to be four years this time and he was definitely not going to let a day go by where he didn’t remind you how much he cared for you. There was Facetime, text messaging and social media. No matter what, he would remain devoted to you even if you were on different continents. A part of him was uneasy because Jisung was going to be there with you physically but he trusted you. Plus, Soonyoung, Renjun and Mia were going to be there too and judging by how Soonyoung had explained things to him, the only time you would ever cross paths with Jisung was if you and Renjun decided to step in and check on training camp or when you guys were at home.

He didn’t like that Jisung was going to be staying with you at your apartment that you had bought with your own money but he was glad that Mia and Renjun would too be staying with you and again, he trusted you. When the right time came and the two of you could be together once more, then he’d ask you to be his. But for now, you had your own path to walk and he was willing to wait. At least it wasn’t four years right?

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jaehyun-eclipsed · 4 years

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Before I Met You | Eight

Updates: Sundays, ~8 PM EST

Pairing: NCT (Jaehyun, Lucas, Mark…) X Reader/OC

Genre: Romance, Angst, Coming of Age

Summary: Four. There were four people before I fell in love with you… Here are their stories.

Author’s Note: I’m sorry for the delay! I got distracted watching videos of Lucas 🙈 That man is disrespectful to my feelings.

Before I Met You Masterlist

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The furious scritch-scratching of a pencil can be heard even amongst all of the chatter in the dorm’s fifth floor study room. I glance over at Mark as he scribbles down incomprehensible equations in his lab notebook, furrowing his brow in frustration as he struggles to make sense of whatever solution he has just derived.

“You doing okay there?” I ask.

He huffs and pushes his notebook over to me. “Does this look right?”

I squint my eyes in confusion. “What did you do?”

Mark throws his hands up in defeat. “I don’t know! I was just trying to find the density.”

I scan the semblance of chemistry equations, acknowledging the attempt at the proper steps that ultimately fall short. “Well, first you need to find the number of molecules…”

He nods, slowly understanding the task at hand. “Ah, okay, okay! And then you divide that by the Avocado number to get the number of moles, right?”

The corner of my mouth raises to form a half-smile, amused at his use of the term he uses to memorize the name of Avogadro’s number. Mark was quirky like that. “Yes, then multiply that by the molecular weight to convert it to grams.”

“YO! Then I can plug that into the density equation!”

He pulls back his notebook and starts crossing out his previous work before quickly writing in the correct equations.

Mark and I met in our intro chemistry class. He was one of the five boys in our class and one of the only two cute ones. But what really sold it was that he was much nicer than the other guy; more open, less reserved, and he had an infectious smile. He was the definition of sincere happiness.

As is with every class, we started out by introducing ourselves:

“Hi, I’m Y/N and I’m a freshman. Um, I’m a biology major.”

“Hi, my name’s Mark. I’m a freshman and I’m an English major and I’m taking chemistry because I’m also sorta interested in biology.”

He was the only person in the class that I was moderately interested in speaking to; he seemed to get along with everyone. Admittedly, part of my motivation was because I thought he was cute.

I had only decided to speak to him after I caught him staring at me at the beginning of class once. We were listening to our TA give instructions for the day. Mark was standing next to her and I happened to glance at him, realizing that he was already looking at me – and that’s when he smiled that captivating smile of his. Later that day, I went up to him to confirm the melting temperature of the final product (even though I had already confirmed with several groups around me).

A few weeks later, we both happened to be at the fume hood, evaporating our solvents out of a flask in order to derive our final precipitate. As we were the only two in that part of room, an awkward silence happened to pass between us – one of ‘I know you, but have absolutely no idea what to say.’ Luckily for me, he was the first one to speak this time.

“How was your spring break?” he asked, keeping his focus on his flask.

“It was fine. I went home and studied for most of it since we have that midterm coming up in a week.”

“And where’s home for you?”

“Medford,” I said. “Oregon. It’s a small town, really pretty. How about you?”

“I’m from Vancouver.” He turned to smile at me. “Canada.”

Another pause passes between us.

“Hey, have you looked over the post-lab questions for this experiment?” he asked.

“Yeah.”

“Do you know how to do them?”

“Yeah, I think so. The equations we need are in the lecture notes.”

He hummed in response before turning to look at me. “Do you think I could get your number in case I need help? I get really confused in lecture sometimes.”

The excitement on my face was clearly evident as I said, “Sure!”

And that is how this all started. Every week since then, Mark and I would meet up to do the post-lab questions together.

That first homework session Mark and I had together was a turning point for me. Transitioning to college had been a challenge. Leaving home, living on my own, and adjusting to the rigor of the classes left me feeling defeated a lot of the time. Back in high school, I had to put in a lot of homework hours, but none of the material was necessarily difficult. It was just time consuming because we were given so much. But the content in college was tough. I had gotten a C on my first midterm and due to being a 4.0 student in high school, a C was unfathomable. It didn’t lend me anymore comfort knowing that more than fifty percent of my grade was based on exam performance and yet, I could spend hours and hours studying without a guarantee of a positive return. It was discouraging.

If I wasn’t in class, I was spending my time by myself in my dorm. I had two roommates, but I didn’t particularly care for either of them. One would wake up early to go to the gym and come back in the morning and slam everything she possibly could on her desk as if nobody else lived there. The other girl – well, her laptop’s wallpaper was a selfie… I think that tells you plenty.

Overall though, it was lonely. I didn’t care for the people I had befriended at the beginning of the year for various reasons so I called my dad every day and counted the days until I could go home.

I’ll never forget the way I felt when I returned home for winter break. Doyoung, Hana, and I had gone over to Taeyeon’s house one night after having dinner and milkshakes. We were there until three in the morning doing acroyoga and dancing in her living room. We were just being kids – carefree and happy. The overwhelming joy I felt that night was something I hadn’t felt in months and I remember having a moment of self-awareness as I watched Doyoung balance Hana on his knees.

I’m not happy.

Starting college in a different state was supposed to be a new beginning. One that’s supposed to be “the best four years of my life.” One where I’d meet a diverse group of people from all over the world. One where I’d get to experience my first college party, fall in love, discover my passion, learn new things... And while I was learning a lot in class, met many people, and did go to my first college party, I was slowly hoping that it would all end soon even though everything had just begun. I was alone and didn’t feel like I had anyone to talk to. That made me realize something else: Being alone never bothered me until it was no longer a choice.

Shortly after those moments of realization, the nightmares started. I had trouble sleeping and when I did finally manage to fall asleep, I’d abruptly wake up hours later, hyperventilating in a cold sweat.

What am I doing? How am I going to get through this?

Who was that confident person I was back in high school?

Where did she go?

Maybe she was just... acting.

Great, I’ve been acting my whole life.

“Y/N.” He sighs loudly and turns to look at me, pulling me from my reverie. “Why are you so amazing?”

I smile back at him. It’s comments like these that make my heart stall and my chest feel warm. Though, I wish I believed him. I know he’s just talking about me helping him with chemistry, but sometimes I hope that it’s a little more than that. We’re in the same year and we get along really well. Plus, he’s really cute. Perhaps we could start dating.

Mark has made me feel comfortable here. I look forward to seeing him every week. His carefree and go with the flow nature is addicting. If he’s ever stressed, he’s very good at hiding it. It’s the complete opposite of my personality. Mark is someone I want to be around all the time.

I love his little quirks. Like when he gets frustrated and furrows his brow. He shakes his head in frustration and clicks his tongue. Or when he laughs – it’s a loud, boisterous laugh followed by a punch in the shoulder to whoever is closest to him. He has this youthfulness to him that will never die. He searches for the happiness in everything and encourages everyone around him. He’s the friend everyone wishes they had.

“You know,” he begins, “I can’t believe that we lived in the same unit this whole time.”

Mark lived in the neighboring dorm building, leaving little opportunity to meet unless we happened to dine near each other in the cafeteria or attended the dorm-wide events in the multi-purpose room.

It would’ve been nice to have a friend earlier on.

“Oh, I saw you a few weeks into the semester,” I say.

He looks at me, clearly surprised. “Yo, what? You did?!” he exclaims. “Why didn’t you say ‘hi’?!”

Mark is in disbelief when I shrug. We hadn’t spoken yet when I saw him that time. I was surprised and quite excited that the cute guy from chem class lived in the same unit as I did. But I was way too shy to say anything. I didn’t want him knowing that I remembered his name and had been paying attention to him ever since the first day of class. He probably didn’t remember my name anyway. But knowing we did live near each other did give me some encouragement to make an attempt to talk to him.

“I – I don’t know. I didn’t really know who you were,” I say. “I mean, I knew you were in my chem class, but –”

“Where did you see me?”

“You were getting the mail.”

“You should’ve said ‘hi’! I would’ve recognized you!”

I open my mouth to say something, but end up making weird gestures with my hands as I don’t know how to respond honestly to Mark’s comment.

He sighs and looks at me with a playfully stern expression. “Well next time, you gotta say ‘hi’! I like saying ‘hi’ to my friends!”

I nod. “Okay, yes, sir,” I quip. “I’ll remember that next time.”

He grins widely and puts his pencil down. “Hey, are you busy tomorrow?”

“I have class at eleven, but that’s it,” I say. “Why?”

“Do you wanna go play badminton with me?!”

I squint my eyes in confusion. This is not the request I was expecting. “Uh…”

“The weather’s supposed to be really nice and I just got the new net I ordered online! I wanna try it out!”

“Uh, okay,” I say slowly. “Sure. I didn’t realize you liked to play badminton.”

“Oh yeah! It’s my favorite! I used to play with my brother all the time back in Vancouver. Have you played?”

“I used to play in high school. Actually, my team in P.E. won our badminton tournament!”

“Oh! You must be pretty good then!”

“Probably not. It’s been a while.”

“Well, it’s gonna be fun! I’ll meet you on the lawn in front of the library? Like, three?”

“Sure!”

The next day is bright and sunny and after attending psychology discussion, I returned home for a quick sandwich followed by an hour of reading before changing clothes. I opted for a coral cold-shoulder top, blue denim shorts, knock-off boat shoes, and pulled my wavy, brown locks into a ponytail. At two-thirty, I set out for campus.

When I arrive on the lawn, Mark has already set up the net. He picks up a racket, spins it around in his hand, and then tosses a birdie with his free hand up into the air. A loud whack is heard moments before the projectile lands right in front of my feet. I look up and am met with Mark’s bright smile and an excited wave.

“Hey!” Mark runs over to me, enveloping me in a hug. “Isn’t it beautiful today?!” He pulls back to look at me. “You look very summery today!”

“Oh, yeah, I figured since it’s nice out today and there’s no wind…” I shrug.

“Yeah! It’s perfect for us to play!” He picks up the birdie from the ground. “Come on!”

I follow him over to where he had set up the net, picking up the other racket near one of the poles. He’s smiling at me when I look at him again. “Don’t make fun of me if I lose!”

He laughs. “Don’t worry! I won’t! You’ll just have to help me out with chemistry.”

“I already do that!”

It’s momentary and I nearly miss it, but there’s a very brief hesitation before his lips curve up into a bashful smile. His eyes are soft and I detect the slightest bit of admiration in them. There’s a crooked smile on my face when I narrow my eyes at him in curiosity. He remains silent.

After a few moments, I turn my gaze away from him, trying to bite back an embarrassed smile as I superficially glance over at some students playing ultimate Frisbee.

“Are you ready to play?!” Mark asks suddenly.

“Yeah!”

I walk to the opposing side of the net and ready myself for Mark’s serve.

“Zero, zero!”

Swiftly, I swing the racket with a bit of force, easily returning Mark’s serve. He misses.

“Lucky shot,” he remarks, shaking his head.

I pick up another one of the birdies. “One, zero!”

We’re able to rally for a bit when I decide to carry out my signature move from high school. I barely tap the birdie, giving it just enough force to barely make it over the net.

“Oh – what the?!” Mark shouts as he attempts to dive just as the birdie hits the ground.

“Two, zero,” I say with a wide grin.

I’m looking at him as he’s sitting on the ground on my side of the net, one arm propped up on his knee. He chuckles and looks up at me, squinting into the sunlight.

“And you thought you were going to be bad at this!”

I shrug innocently. “I don’t know… or are you just letting me win? Hm?”

“No! Of course not!”

“Oh, so you’re just not very good at this,” I tease. “That’s okay. I understand.” I break out into laughter when he looks at me with a playful frown.

“Hey!” He’s laughing now. “You know that I’m facing the sun, right?! I’m at a disadvantage.”

I wave my hand in dismissal. “Excuses.”

I extend my hand out to help him stand up. Unfortunately, the weight distribution between us is very imbalanced and results in Mark pulling me down; I fall on top of him with a loud squeal.

“I’m so sorry!” I say in between laughs, trying push myself up off of him with my hands on either side of his body.

He places a hand on the small of my back. “Are you okay?”

I lift my head to look at him, feeling my heart jump briefly as I realize how close we are together. My laughter ceases.

“Uh, yeah,” I say, quickly pushing myself off of him and standing up on my own, brushing myself off.

I watch him as he ducks under the net and repositions himself, smiling widely at me again.

There’s a warmth and giddiness that fills my chest and I recognize it immediately. It’s the same happiness I felt with Doyoung, Hana, and Taeyeon. I smile to myself.

I think things are going to be okay.

I’m suddenly caught off guard when I hear Mark’s racket strike the birdie. My eyes widen as it flies over to my right.

“Oh!” I yelp as I lunge to the side a moment too late.

“Sorry, I was thinking about something,” I say as I turn around to pick up the birdie.

“Oh… about what?”

I smile back at him. “Nothing really. Just that I’m having a lot of fun.”

He cracks a grin as I’m about to serve. “One, two,” he quips.

I frown. “Does that even count?”

“One, two,” he says again with a mischievous smile.

That night, while catching up on some psychology reading, my phone vibrates, Mark’s name flashing on the message notification.

Mark [8:07 PM] Yo! Hey! Today was really fun! Thanks for coming!

Me [8:10 PM] Thank you for inviting me! I haven’t had that much fun in a while

Mark [8:15] Oh and thanks so much for helping me out all the time in chem! You’re a life saver! 😊

Mark [8:17 PM] If you’re up to it, I’d love to take you out for lunch as a thank you! 😊

Mark has been responsible for many of my smiles over the past few weeks. And here he is, doing it again. I chuckle to myself as I feel the giddiness of having a crush return.

Me [8:20 PM] Yeah! That would be great! Thank you!

I don’t think this is a date, but at the very least, I know that Mark likes spending time with me. He’s also definitely a lot nicer than Lucas. So who knows? We have the next three years to find out.

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Before I Met You Masterlist Masterlist

#nct #nct 127 #nct u #wayv #cznnet #nct mark #mark lee #nct jaehyun #jung jaehyun #wong yukhei #nct lucas #lucas wong #nct x reader #nct fluff #nct angst #SUPERM #before i met you

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onewhoturns · 5 years

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six sentence sunday 9/1

(I lied, it’s not six sentences, it’s my excuse to post the beginning of the bartender au so FUCK IT HERE WE GO)

It’s half past 1 on a Saturday night. Technically, Alex should still be on shift at The Island. Instead, she’s waiting outside a dive called the Kanaloa, phone in hand, combat-booted foot propped against the brick wall behind her. Somehow she gets away with not wearing heels to work. The waitresses have to wear them, but Alex is behind the bar and, therefore, no one sees her feet. Ergo, no heels required.

(Or so she argued to her employers, and they accepted because no one really wants to face repercussions for a sexist dress code, and technically there may have also been some legal issues around appropriate footwear for dealing with breakable glass. Either way, she won.)

“Alex!”

Blue hair is blown out of her face with a little puff as she slips her cell into her pocket, grinning at the approaching duo before Ren already has his arms around her.

“Thought you were gonna go pink?” Her oldest friend tugs at a loose strand of hair, sharing her grin.

“Thought you were gonna go vegan?” She smirks, smacking him upside the head.

“Ow! And yeah, I did. Briefly.”

Alex laughs and hugs his companion. “Hey, Nona.”

“Hey Alex.”

“So, Miss Night Owl finally managed to make some time for us, huh?” Ren is giving her a hard time again. Par for the course. She doesn’t mind it.

“Look, when you guys are only free on the weekend and I’m working 8-4… Or if I’m picking up an extra half-day? I mean, no offense, but I’m not gonna wake up at 11 just so we can grab brunch,” she scoffs.

“Oh, like you’re so much better than brunch.”

“Keep your avocado toast, hipster. If I ever get roped into brunching, it’ll only be for bottomless Bloody Marys.”

“Or mimosas,” Nona pipes up, helpfully.

“Yes, exactly Nona. Mimosas will also do, thank you.” Alex gestures to Ren’s girlfriend, giving him a see, I told you, kind of look. He just snorts.

“So, why aren’t we meeting at your place?” Ren is actually holding the door for her. Obviously, Nona has gradually trained him into manners. Good for her. Only took, what, eight, ten years of on-again off-again highschool sweetheartdom to get him there?

Nona goes in first, and as Alex passes she makes a gesture at Ren, mouthing ‘whipped.’ It’s good for him, though. Nona’s the calm anchor to his frenetic hyperactivity. And beneath all her jibes and smirking, she’s really happy for him. They finally seem to be taking things seriously. Years of starting and stopping for school, of phone calls at 2am because there’s a guy on her Instagram, are they dating? Is she dating someone? (You’re not actually together right now, Ren. YEAH but I LOVE her!, etc) -- finally, they’re living in the same city again. And have actually moved in together. Or-- well, that was actually probably a year ago, now. They’d settled in Seattle and she… had yet to make the trip. Whoops. But luckily they came here!

“It’s called the Kanaloa! Like the thing on Edwards Island, right? A throwback to Camena! Besides, I wanted to spare you the herpes,” she tosses the comment over her shoulder, overtaking Nona to lead the way to a booth in the corner. The place is a classic dive: dart boards, pool tables, smoke somehow always hanging in the air even though no one has smoked in a bar in… years. An actual honest-to-god jukebox. It’s a shame the place is kinda dying out. Ah well, shit happens. Gotta keep with the times.

Nona snorts a laugh (ah yes, the training has gone both ways), and Ren smirks. “What a way to talk about your workplace, Al-”

“Oh shut up,” she punches him in the arm. “I meant this.” She gestures to the glitter clinging to her skin -- her shoulders, her cheeks, her cleavage (because of course there’s cleavage, she’s a bartender at a club for god’s sake, how else would she get tips? People like some skin and being given just enough of a hard time. She’s not gonna deny them that if it pays her rent). “It’s go-go night for the month, and they just love the stuff.” She’d have it in her hair for at least three more days.

There’s half a second’s pause before she turns narrowed eyes on Ren again. “Wait, are you saying you think I wear this on a regular basis?” Admittedly, yes, the shirt is one of her favorites, but the pink and white PVC skirt? Yeah no. Never. It is reserved specifically for go-go night and only go-go night. She bought it as a joke at a thrift store and ended up using it in a Slutty Power Rangers Halloween costume (college, don’t ask) and it sat in her closet for months before the Island became a gig, and go-go night became a thing, and… Well. The rest is history?

“I never see you,” Ren whines. “And all your photos are of, like, cocktails and puns. How am I supposed to know?”

Alex rolls her eyes but - fair. “Well. You’re here now. So let’s have a drink and catch up, mkay? I’m technically supposed to be back on shift in like an hour, but Mick said she’d cover me and-- well, if you want, I can probably sneak you guys in if you wanna crash some poor fuck’s party on the floor. There’s enough noise and flashing lights that you can just commando right in there.” She already knows the answer. Ren, of course, is intrigued because he might have had that phase in college of going to raves and taking too much Molly and… yikes. Nona - ever reasonable - is already grimacing at the idea of a club at 2am.

Ren turns his bright-eyed hopeful look to Nona, then smiles ruefully. “We’re probably gonna pass.”

“Should you be drinking mid-shift?”

Alex scoffs. “I drink on shift. I’m running at like BAC .02 most of the night,” she jokes.

Nona looks troubled, and Alex quickly walks it back. “Kidding. I don’t drink much outside of work, okay? It’s not-- I’m not just spending all day drinking. It’s just part of the job.” And daytime is for sleeping, anyway. And laundry. And running Postmates. And checking Craigslist. You do things to make ends meet, right?

She doesn’t like the look Ren and Nona are exchanging. It’s that we need to talk about Alex look. She got that a lot at the end of senior year, when she was spending more time tagging along with anyone else than talking with her own family. She got that the first time she dropped out (for like one semester! One measly semester! She made up for it in a summer term, God, calm down). It makes her mouth sour, and she immediately tries to smooth it over.

“Look, I’m sorry you guys came all the way down here just for a couple hours. We can…” She grits her teeth and tries not to grimace. “We can get together tomorrow before my shift.”

“For…” Ren has cast aside the worried look in favor of one more amused, watching her jaw tic.

“For…” It takes everything in her not to scoff. “...brunch,” she grumbles. As soon as it’s out of her, Ren is laughing out loud and she sticks out her tongue like it’s covered in something disgusting. “Ugh, God, can’t I just get you guys some drinks instead?”

Nona shoots another look at Ren, and it’s another one she’s seen too often. The do you make enough to be treating us, two full-time Adult Employed People, to drinks? look.

She huffs out a laugh. “Oh my God, calm down. I got this.”

(Oh hey look, here’s an aesthetic board for this that gives some more story) (And look at that, we’re posting it on AO3)

#bartender au #it needs a name #probably gonna be vaguely religious for reasons that appear later in the story #(they're jonas reasons)#jonalex #alex/jonas #oxenfree fic #jfc i'm so sorry to all the real bartenders out there alex is not a shining example of the craft #my writing #six sentence sunday #i know it's more than six sentences #oxenfree #Holy Spirits

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dillydedalus · 5 years

Text

september reading

i read some things i guess! open for the last (almost) of robin hobb, more mountaineering disasters, and …. dungeons & dragons?? (i completely forgot i had this in my drafts lol)

the nickel boys, colson whitehead idk man this is really well-written, well-paced, an important story based very much on real history, the characters serve their purpose very well, the violence and abuse is written in a way that is chilling without ever being gratuitous and with the exception of a twist that i thought was a little too predictable, there’s nothing i can really criticise. it just really lacked some spark for me, and maybe it’s just that after underground railroad (which is also didn’t particularly like, but damn that had spark) it feels a lil conventional. still good tho! 3/5

the adventure zone #1: here there be gerblins, various mcelroys & cary pietsch my brain Does Not Do podcasts but obvi i’ve been hearing A LOT about the mcelroy boys & i’m like. vaguely interested in d&d* so when this was made available on overdrive i was like okay why the hell not. it’s a fun, quick read, and while i don’t really know anything about d&d the trappings of the game were included in a fun way. nothing mindblowing, but a good time. 2.5/5

assassin’s fate (fitz & the fool #3), robin hobb y’all this is it… it’s been over a year & now i’m done with the realm of the elderlings (actually i still have the piebald prince novella & the short stories). i have some criticisms of this one (the timeline & the main climax seemed a lil muddled to me) but to be honest??? loved this, had all the feelings, was superhappy to see my cursed shores kids again, fitzy & bee were heartbreaking all the time, the paragon conflict was great, when fitz got to the quarry i literally immediately started uglycrying & pretty much didn’t stop until the end, so: 4.5/5 (series rating 4/5 i guess bc fool’s assassin was a drag & a half)

die nebelkrähe, alexander pechmann this is a speculative fictionalisation of a little episode in the spiritualist movement where medium hester dowden claimed she had communicated with/been briefly possessed by oscar wilde, which is pretty fun. unfortunately, pechmann chose to focus on his version of mr v., a pretty boring mathematician and skeptic, rather than the absolutely wild shit going on with dowden, which includes oscar wilde’s ghost dunking on james joyce (who responded by making fun of the whole thing in finnegans wake) and claiming he’s like totally straight. 2/5

oval, elvia wilk a neoliberal corporate hell/psychotropics/eco-punk gone wrong dystopia in berlin so you know i’m here (i.e. in berlin lol) for it. this is about a berlin in the not too distant future where finster corp (real subtle) is buying up everything, driving up rents through ecological redevelopment, artists mainly work as consultants for corporations, and our protags anja and louis live in a finster-sponsored zero-waste eco-commune on an artificial mountain in the middle of berlin. everyone’s jobs are nda-clad bullshit, everyone parties all the time without ever enjoying themselves, homelessness and income inequality are ignored with the barest twinge of guilt, and louis is developing a party drug that chemically makes you generous. oh and the nature on the mountain (the berg -.-) seems to be eating itself. the concepts are great, the writing is pretty good even tho it tries a bit too hard sometimes, wilk, while also suffering a lil from Expat Gaze, really knows berlin. the execution isn’t perfect, the pacing is a bit off, too much time is devoted to anja and louis’ boring relationship, and look, some of the dystopian elements are a bit obvious. neoliberalism bad. okay, we know. but there’s a lot of good here, and the ending is pretty great, if a bit underdeveloped. 3.5/5

travelers, helon habila a novel about the african diaspora in europe, told thru 6 inter-connected stories, all focusing on one story of migration. these are important stories well told, and i liked how they all linked up in the end. while berlin is the central hub these stories revolve around, not all are set in berlin and the setting really isn’t as central as i’d hoped (this is obvi very personal to me & my research interests so it’s not really criticism). i’d recommend this if you’re interested in the representation of african migrants and refugees. 3/5

the uninhabitable earth: life after warming, david wallace-wells shit’s fucked: the book. starts with ‘it is worse, much worse, than you think’ and doesn’t really get much more cheery from there. good if you want an idea of what the effects of global warming might be (a pretty pessimistic one, which is the point - when does pessimism become realism?), and how we (& how we might) respond to them. 3/5

the girl from the other side, nagabe (#1-5) spooky-yet-wholesome manga series about a snazzy demon who’s adopted a little human girl who has been abandoned/cast out by her human community, which is like 100% my jam. the central relationship is super cute & wholesome, the demon designs are amazing, the worldbuilding is really spooky & intriguing (if you touch a demon you’ll be cursed & also turn into a demon & tbh who doesn’t want to turn into a weird tall slightly monster with cool horns), and a lot of it is just the demon like. badly baking pie to cheer the girl up.

girl woman other, bernardine evaristo somewhere between a novel and a collection of short stories written in a somewhat unconventional but highly readable style. the 12 stories each focus on one woman (and one nonbinary person), most of them black, examing black womanhood in britain throughout the 20th and 21st centuries. i enjoyed many of these stories, but the observational style and the way we quickly cover whole lives left me a bit detached. there’s also a lil corniness throughout, which comes out in full force in the epilogue, and while it’s cool to have trans rep, it honestly came across as a bit clueless. 3/5

dark summit: everest’s most controversial season, nick heil did someone say high-altitude mountaineering disasters? because i’m always here for some high-altitude mountaineering disasters. this is about the 2006 season which was p disastrous in terms of deaths even tho it didn’t even have a storm (cf the 1996 season aka please just read into thin air), just people walking past dudes who were dying bc rescues are extremely difficult & dangerous. anyway this ain’t into thin air, but it’s a good one & pretty wild bc all mountain climbers are fucking nuts. 3.5/5

sense & sensibility, jane austen really enjoyed this! the pacing is a lil weird & none of the men really is all that, but it’s all very charming & witty & i love sisterhood narratives (poor margaret!). as in (tho not as much as in) mansfield park, there’s a lot of attitudes that just don’t really track but in contrast to mp i found them interesting rather than frustrating, mostly - brandon/marianne is very uncomfortable especially when you realise that he’s projecting his tragic dead first love/sis-in-law onto marianne and that we don’t really see their courtship at all, but w/e. i especially enjoyed the ferrars family drama and the hilarious resolution to it, and i gotta say: lucy steele really did that & good for her. 4/5

anyway, i’m about halfway thru alasdair gray’s lanark, which is a great big pomo brick, half portrait of the artist as a young glaswegian, half weird visions of hell in the city of unthank & i’m into it but it’s not a quick read. in october uni reading is also going to start, perhaps for the last semester ever :(

#the only podcast i ever semi-successfully followed was welcome to nightvale #and only because it was the kind of story where it didn't matter if you spaced out several times in between #and even then i kinda had to stop once they started having an overarching plot #*lmao rereading my lil review for adventure zone where i say i'm vaguely interested in dnd is a trip #after i spent the whole last month mainlining critical role and most of my dreams now involve dice stuff i barely understand #like i really had three separate dreams about dnd last night & i've never played it & know nothing about it that isn't in critical role #really just want to be a tiefling that bad huh #the books i read

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skizmin · 6 years

Text

Ravenclaw Woojin

genre: fluff of course, sorta?? enemies to lovers but?? not really???, an adamant y/n and a soft woojin,,,, none of the other members appear which i didnt even realise until i finished

okay so woojin is ravenclaws most trusted prefect as hes the eldest one and literally does The Most to make himself available for others

seriously once he asked the defence against the dark arts professor for a 2 week extension on his assignment so he could tutor 5 people for the upcoming charms exam

like,,,,,,,, damn

anyway so you actually do this extended course of charms, youre in the same class as woojin and for some reason??? the fact that hes so naturally good at it pisses you off

especially when youre falling slightly behind in that class

okay a LOt behind

your like,, only friend in that class is dropping it next term to focus on her divination classes and she doesn’t get it either but it doesnt affect her grades not nearly as much as it affects yours.

shes all “dude just ask for woojin to tutor you” and youre like

No NO no

no way are you being tutored by kim woojin. the idea just embarrasses you

you’re usually fine with getting help from peers but woojin?? everyone goes to him for tutoring and you sorta just dont??? wanna put yourself into that group???

you feel like it makes you inferior to him for some reason which is the worst feeling ever

(even tho you totally arent bc youre beating him in potions anyway)

anyway so its a wednesday morning and the class is about to end to allow the students to go have breakfast (you know how extended courses are out of normal school times ye??)

you’re tired as fuck

confused as fuck

hungry as fuck

everything as fuck

but then “y/n!” called you to your senses and you stopped packing your things

your professor had just called you up, an ancient tiny little man who was apart of the great battle of hogwarts some time ago

“yes sir?”

“come here would you?”

you shoved your ink jar into your bag and nodded, walking out from behind your desk and saying bye to your friend who was leaving already

god she really did hate this class you thought lmao

the majority of the students were still packing their things away in a slow drawl probably instigated by the dim, sleepy light of the chilly morning

“anything i can help you with?” you awkwardly asked your professor who smiled at you, stepping down from his place standing on books to look up at you

“yes actually, ive noticed you’re falling behind.”

you cringed, hard, not even wanting to turn around and see who was watching

“i suggest you get a tutor if you wanna get an A for this semester, y/n.”

“sir, i don’t have time to be tutored!”

“well then i guess you’re going to fail this course y/n. just be tutored enough to catch you up on the syllabus and then i can help you with the rest, okay?”

you internally groaned. this was bad

“you’re smart, it’ll only be about 2 weeks before youre caught up. im sure theres plenty of people that would tutor you.”

you nodded and politely fare-welled the teacher before turning to walk out of the classroom

the classroom was surprisingly empty, and you were happy to see that, not really excited about your professor sharing the fact that you were failing the course

sighing to yourself, you walked out of the door, planning to go meet your friends in the great hall

“hey! wait! y/n!”

you whipped around, half scared to death

the halls were practically empty yet

there was kim woojin

standing right next to the doorway you had just exited

your head tipped back. had he really been standing there the whole time?

“do you wanna meet tonight or something? we can go to the library?”

you gave him a pointed stare

“what? why?”

woojin was a little taken aback, he grew smaller under your gaze.

“oh, so i can- you know, tutor you? i heard you were behind by a bit.”

he looked almost embarrassed at how you were responding to his offer as you sharpened your gaze on him

“i dont need you to tutor me. i can find someone else.”

and with that you left a frowning, dumbfounded woojin standing in the hallway as you stalked off to the great hall

stupid woojin

who did he think he was asking you to meet him in the library

surely you can catch up on your own, you really dont need his help. you’re like, shaking your head lmao

smh

but anyway, the end of the day comes and you grab all these phat stacks of parchment and take you study charm books to the library and sit at the farthest ever table away from literally everyone

you start studying properties of all the spells youve learnt this second term

you get to the third spell, aparecium, one youve been having a lot of trouble remembering

you groaned, looking up in your book what exactly the spell meant and remembering it was in fact a revealing charm and you didnt have any pages with invisible ink on them.

you began flipping further into the book, trying to find the incantation for concealing ink writing so you could practise

“h-here.”

you fuCKING LEAPED IN YOUR SEAT

BITCH TF

THAT SCARED YOu oh my god what was he doing here

“s-sorry for scaring you b-but, its got concealed writing on it so you can, like- practise?”

he sounded sorta hopeful as he slid the paper over to you, hands nervously twining with each other in front of him afterwards

your pride was getting to you tho so

“i’m good at that spell, i don’t need to practise it.”

woojin blinked and squinted at you a little, trying to figure out whether or not you were lying

“ooookayyyy. anyway, anything else you want help with? i can explain it a little bit for you?”

you resisted the MASSIVE urge to roll your eyes at him

we get it, youre good at this

“im okay, thanks.”

you expect woojin to leave then, and it seems he does too as he stutters in his movement before clenching his eyes shut

“do you not l-like me or something? or did i-, did i do something to you?” he peeked an eye open to gauge your reaction

he looked almost

scared?

oh no, oh no

what was this guilt? you could feel your glare softening in an instant

why are you liKE THIS

“n-no! i dont!” you stuttered out a reply, eyes widening slightly

and then, he smiled. and he smiled wide

you felt blinded almost, your heart started palpitating. so this is what it was like to have woojin smile at you, and you only.

you were fucked

“oh! okay then! sorry i just-, i just thought i’d annoyed you or something so..” he trailed off, tapping his shoe on the ground suddenly very interested in the lamp on the library desk

“anyway!” he spoke up again. “i’ll uh, i’ll leave you to it. and don’t forget to practise aparecium. it’ll be on the next test for sure.” he grinned at you again and you sorta maybe might have felt heat crawling to your cheeks.

“t-thanks woojin.”

he nodded at you, still smiling before leaving

you banged your head on the table, what in the world was that interaction

whilst burying your face in your hands you noticed he had left the enchanted paper with you, you shrugged

might as well use it, right?

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, shit

1 and a half hours later yu were groaning out of pure frustration with yourself. no matter how perfectly you practised the incantation or how directly you swished your wand at the page, nothing appeared

no writing or anything

you were beginning to wonder if woojin gave you the right piece of parchment, that this was the one with the invisible ink

you shook your head, looking at the clock closest to you and deciding it was too late to be studying and that your brain mustnt be working right,

you packed up your stuff and went back to your dorm, making sure to get as good a sleep as possible because you had another extension charms lesson tomorrow morning

,,,

anyway so you woke up late in the morning with a sore neck and red eyes.

this was Not Good

quickly tugging on your robes and frantically shoving things into your bag whilst brushing your teeth you rushed out of you dormitory and ran all the way to the charms classroom

you ran in out of breath, your professor looking at you with an unimpressed look. “glad to see you could make it y/n.” he drawled before turning back to the blackboard

you whined as you saw him writing a test warning for 2 weeks time, sleepily stumping your way over to your friend who was laughing at you loudly

unpacking your things, you glanced around the room. eyes landing on woojin who had a hand resting under his chin staring right back at you

your cheeks went a bit red when he smiled at you, giving you a small wave before turning his head to the board again

your friend next to you shoved you a little bit, when your turned your head you face her she simply mouthed an i saw that

you rolled your eyes and paid attention to the rest of the lesson without any distractions

anddddd thennnnnn it was over

you blinked, your notes were cleaner today than usual

“hey, y/n!” you looked up to find woojin standing in front of your desk, toothy grin on his face as per usual

your heart sorta skipped a beat before you were able to tell it not to

“hey woojin :))” you smiled, trying your best to sound friendly whilst not looking like an absolute fool

he sorta squinted at you a bit before “so uh, how was studying?”

it was your turn to look at him sceptically this time

“it was,,,,,, good??” you questioned, unsure of how to respond

woojins smile sorta falters before coming back with a somewhat sad lilt to it

“ah, right. well i gotta go. my friends are waiting.” and with that he nodded at you and left

you were confused as fuck

well, that was certainly weird

anyway, for the next week and 3 days, woojin completely avoided you

you’d be fine with this of course if you hadnt gotten that little soft spot for him a while back

it sorta hurt when your smiled at him and he sorta just sadly smiled back and looked away, or if you were gonna say hi to him he’d scurry away before one word could leave your mouth

you were really down about it honestly

bUT you also didnt have time to worry about it

your test was in FOUR. DAYS.

AND you had studied everything else to the best of your ability apaRT from the revealing charm, aparecium.

you wanted to cry, no one could explain it well enough to you and you could say the incantation right bc everyone spoke too fast and apparently you had to use it MULTIPLE times on the tes to maKE QUESTIONS APPEAR.

QUESTIONS

INVISIBLE QUESTIONS THAT COUNT TOWARDS YOUR MARK

basically, you were having a mental breakdown and you knew there was only one person left to try and explain it to you

kim woojin

again, he was A V O I D I N G Y O U

which made you angry bc you neED TO GET AN A

anyway, so your class on a tuesday was an afternoon class and you sorta just planned to corner him there after class

flitwick usually left 10 minutes early to arrive at his choir practises on time and put a charm on the door so no student could leave early

so the time comes, the bells ring and students rush out of the class you go and lie in their beds or whatever most teenagers do nowadays

and you make your way over to woojin’s desk as he packs up his things, he was always the last to leave

you coughed to get his attention, when he looked up his eyes widened

“i need your help.” you stated, eyes boring into his, you could swear you saw pink flush over his cheeks

“im uh, im busy. sorry y/n-”

“just one charm? please? i really need it, no one else can explain it.”

woojins eyes softened and he bit his lip. he was contemplating.

“okay.” you smiled at him widely “lets try now, okay?”

you nodded, placing you bag down and grabbing out some enchanted pieces of parchemnt, including the one he gave you

you sat down next to him and he look confused

“whats the paper for?”

“the aparecium charm.” you replied simply, turning to face him

a look of realisation dawned over his face

“i thought you said you were good at that charm?” he muttered

you looked at him weird, why was he acting so strange?

“i lied, i didnt want help back then but i do now. so,”

and then he grinned widely, taking a piece of paper that wasnt the one he gave you and telling you to watch closely

“aparecium.” he said, clearly. swishing his wand almost expertly

you looked at the paper in front of you and saw the writing of hello appear on it in your cursive handwriting

you looked up at him in aw.

“can you say it again? slowly? i dont think im pronouncing it right.”

woojin giggled

G I G G L E D

and repeated himself, clear and slow. you nodded at him, taking a random piece of paper and clearing your throat

“wait!” woojin yelped “use this one!”

you furrowed your brows as he shoved the piece of paper he gave you in the library in front of you

“uh, okay?” you replied, glancing up at his smile

clearing your throat again, you swished you wand and spoke clearly. “aparecium.”

nothing happened to the paper and you groaned loudly

“oh, y/n, your pronunciation is perfect. its the swish thats wrong.”

you bored your eyes into him “what?”

“youre doing it this way. youre supposed to do it this way” he flourished his wand to demonstarte to you the wrong doing

you still furrowed your brow, not really seeing the difference between the two

“here, i’ll show you”

o hMY GOD HE

HE JUST GRABBED YOUR HAND HOLY SHIT

SIRENS CALL THE AMBULANCE

YOU REALLY ALMOST CHOKED ON AIR

suddenly you felt fire all over. red surely covering your face as you tried to concentrate but holY SHIT

“okay so youre going like this.” he moved your hand in his own, making out the movement you made before

“but you should be doing this.”

o h

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh

now you get it

you wanted to bang your head on the table for being so dumb about it

“oH RIGHT! woojin you’re literally a life saver!”

he laughed again, retracting his hand from yours as red splashed over his cheeks and onto his ears

“well, go on! try it!

you smiled, looking down at the paper and saying a strong and clear incantation whilst moving your wand exactly how woojin showed you to

you squeALED in excitement as ink dotted onto the page!

you grabbed woojin by the forearm and raised it above both of your heads in celebration

he laughed and cheered along with you before you settled down, beginning your massive thank you speech.

“seriously i couldnt have done it without your help i could have faile-”

“y/n, read it.” woojin smiled at you

“what?” you replied, confused

“read the parchment.”

eyebrows furrowing once again you looked down at the parchment with now visible ink

do you wanna maybe go to hogsmeade with me this weekend?

your eyes widened

no way

no way no way no way

you snapped your eyes up to meet his

this is why he avoided you! he thought youd rejected him in such a selfish cold hearted way!

“i’ve uh, actually liked you for a while. we missed last weekend but im down to go next weekend if you want?”

“i- i, i mean, y-you! of course! i’ll go with you, yeah! oh my god i am so sorry you mustve thought i was such a bitch i shouldnt have lied im an awf-”

oh my fUCKING GOD

CODE FUCKING RED HIS HANDS WHERE ON YOUR CHEEKS

AND HIS LIPS ON YOURS

BREATHING? WHOS SHE

your eyes clenched shut as you reached to grab the front of his robes, kissing him back

you felt so goddamn dizzy, your mind cloudy at the absolute bliss of the feeling of his lips and how they moved against yours

he started smiling against you and had to pull away, his eyes glimmering and heart beating out of his chest

“i’ll pick you up at your dorms at 10, okay?”

god, youve never smiled harder.

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legisaskerator · 5 years

Text

vent vent vent

buckle up bastards this is gonna be long as FUCK

holy fucking shit my life yhas been so goddamn hard recently and i’m not handling it well

first and foremost on my mind at this second is the fact that i am in so much fucking pain right now i do not know what to do. my EDS is acting up really really badly and i’m super bedridden right now. i took my last vicodin and i have no idea when i can get more, or how, and i have like nothing to help. i had to leave class today to weep in the fuckin bathroom because i can barely walk and even sitting up is a struggle. if i felt this sort of pain three years ago i would have likely considered doing something VERY rash to stop it and i’m amazed i’m still, almost functioning. i can barely think i’m in agony i want it to end

i’m so scared this is just the next turn that eds is taking. i know i wont ever get better but fuck, i dont want to need a mobility aid yet. i’m only fucking 22 i have to be a teacher!!! how can i fucking teach if i cant write on a board?? or maneuver around classrooms? how will i ever get a job? or even just. live in the house of my dreams. i wish there was some help for me because i am tired of ehlers danlos running my life. i am scared for my future. i cant imagine who i will become if this level of pain becomes my “normal”. someone move me to mass so i can get legal weed to try to numb myself

on the same path of injury, my mother recently injured herself very badly and was hospitalized for a little w hile. ended up needing surgery to put rods and screws and plates in her leg/ankle, and as a result, she’s not functioning for the next 12 weeks. i’m doing my best to help out aroudn the house and i’m filling in for her at work. she does advertising for a newspaper and brings the papers to subscribing businesses,, which i’m taking over now. at least i like driving?

i love my mom and i will do anythign to help her, but god it’s such a load on my shoulders. i’m upset and frustrated because i’m strugtgling to balance my life around this sudden responsibility. it’s definitely not her i’m upset about, it’s not like she did this purposefully??? she needs the help and i am willing to give it. but i am also allowed to feel these emotions. i am upset at the /situation/. her boyf and my sister are barely helping and they’re neglectful and distant. i’m the only emotionally present one in the family and also (aside from mom) am the only nurturing, caring one in the household. i keep her from having panic attacks, i keep her anxiety down, i’m warm and i try so goddamn hard to make sure shes ok. but it’s exhausting. i’m keeping my family together it feels like, everythings crashing down and i’m the only “sane” one. which is sad because ive been a depressed wreck for weeks and have been working on scraping myself off the fucking pavement, trying to get out of the spiral. i’m scared that my mom relies so much on me. she tells me everything, things i don’t want to hear. relationship troubles primarily. i know i give great advice and am ~wise beyond my years~ (thanks trauma) but, that’s what her therapist is for. i’ve told her i wish she would, tell me less, because as her daughter it’s uncomfortable, and she always overreacts like “oh i’ll never tel you anything again if it’s so terrible then” and i end up feeling fucking awful, and it’s a nightmare. but if things keep going the way they are in their relationship (i’m not gonna spill deets because, privacy still) we might lose our house!!! and everything we’ve finally worked for!!

so i feel like, if i can’t fix this problem, it’ll be my fault our lives come crashing down.

i know that’s ridiculous. it’s not my job.

but it still feels like it

i never feel like i’m doing enough. just in life in general. i’m not good enough i’m not working hard enough i just am not enough. i was very saturated with child prodigy shit when i was younger and that fucked up my psyche so much. it’s still thrown at me by my father, americas got talent and movies where the protag is a ~genius~. i hate it. ill never be that and i know that’s what my dad wants of me. i’m not the next bill gates i just want to be a teacher and live my life!!!! i don’t want to start a band and get famous!!!! i dont want to run a business!! i don’t want to revolutionize the world!! just let me please! follow my heart!!!!!! i can’t fucking stand it when he tries to tell me what to do with my life it makes me want to scream and wail and sjafkl; fd fjasfg;akldf

i can’t do this, man.

i’m so alone. i’m sick of the slut life. i’ve been hoeing around for a year and it’s taking a massive toll on my self esteem and sanity. i’s a terrible coping mechanism and i’m very very not healthy about it. i only have sex when i’m heavily under the influence of something and use it as a way of getting attention, which is, awful. i often forgo protection because it’s ~inconvenient~ and the second a guy protests, i’ll cave because i ~live to please~ and don’t want to start shit. i can’t keep doing this. hooking up is the only time people ever touch me. i just want a fuckign hug sometimes

i keep seeing so many posts like “you can’t love another if you don’t love yoursel!” and “people aren’t your medicine” but what if??? they can be to an extent?? part of being uber depressed is self-isolation and i’m so, sick of it. i need some fucking comfort because right now i am suffering through my life alone and it’s so difficult. it’s not as easy as just, settling though. i’m picky with my lovers because?? i deserve someone good? everyone that’s been coming through my life like, has a fatal flaw that i just can’t do. like long term compatability is risked for me with that shit.like, too introverted, too emotionally distant, people who just aren’t smart, i can’t do it?? i just want someone who’s going to comfort me when i need it, who i can have a healthy debate with, and someone who respects my life choices and things i do.

i’ve been talking to one guy recently who, i was hoping maybe could have been a potential. he’s super nice and considerate/respectful, hes HELLA smart, adores a bunch of the same stuff i’m into, we talk really well together, i feel comfortabgle around him, gotta say he’s hot as fuck too...and he just wants friends with benefits. I respect that. i was in a similar spot literally last semester, there was a pretty great guy but i just wasn’t in the right space for a relationship. so friends with benefits. i don’t blame this new guy for not wanting a relationship he has every right!! but oh god it hurts a little. i worry that it’s me, that i’m just a good pussy for him, or a convenient lay who’s down to clown like 99% of the time. he’s been talking to me less recently and i’m worried that he’s...done with me. idk if that’s true or if i’m just reading into it but i’m in a VERY vulnerable place right now in my life, and i really need someone by my side for it. i need the support and warmth.

i wish my warmth would comfort me. i wish i could turn my nurturing attitude around and help myself. i wish i didn’t need smoene else for comfort. i’m a fuckin libra tho i live for romance

this guys’ great though. i hope he sticks around at least for a little bit longer. i want to learn more bout lovecraft.

my sluttiness is my biggest qualm with myself right now. it’s definitely a huge problem in my life, it’s actively causing me problems. my one friend (because, i have only one fucking friend i can actually talk to. that’s it i hAVE ONE i’m so goddamn l,onely) has been like, coaching me through making better decisions? i’m very impulsive and he’s got great advice and is quick to be like “then don’t” and shit. i’m trying really hard to make sure i dont use him as a therapist though, that’s unfair to him. i’m respectful and all that shit don’t worry bout htat. he’s a huge help to me and has been my absolute rock through college, idk where i’d be without him. he also introduced me to his friend group, who are all really amazing people? they welcomed me with open arms and no ones ever done that before. i’m always super outcasted cause i’m weird and i wont hide it because it’s ME goddamnit! but these people, they’re weird too, they’re freaks and outcasts and, while they’ve all been very close friends since they were wee tots, they still welcomed me in. they still wanted me to be part of them. i’m getting to know all of them still, but i’ve got hope that, maybe i’ve got some lifelong friends now. at the very least, i’m sure i’ve got one.

onto phase 4 of my fuckin monologue i guess, topic SHIFT

my thesis is a mess and it’s due in three weeks, i’ve barely gotten anything done because my teacher is awful and i’m worried i’m gonna fail the course

which would be SUPER bad because, i’ve had this teacher too many times and we do not get along, she loathes my existence, and i really just need to get out. shes partly the reason i need an extra fucking year at school and i always DREAD going to her class. it’s humiliating and discouraging to spend three hours every monday there. no one else likes this professor, they’re only here becuase the school loooooves the researchers and writers. complaints dont matter. all of my other classes are fine but this one has been probably the worst, most emotionally devastating class i’ve ever taken

i don’t even get to write about a topic i want. i was forced to write about the play i was in, instead of Monty Python like i wanted (it’s a fucking comedy class!!!!!) the play is about SCHOOL SHOOTINGS (we won some national awards teehee it’s an outstanding play). yes it’s a “black comedy” but not really? it’s a drama with comedic moments? and i KNOW THIS cause i’ve been studying comedy with this professor for like three cumulative years at this point. i’m struggling beacuse there’s zero research, zero information, and has to be over 20 pages long??? like fuck? i’m so fucked

anyway thanks for coming to my TED talk. i’ve been wanting to make a vent post for like weeks but i haven’t had the time or energy and , i really needed to just....get this out. i feel a little better having all the words down. there’s still so much else going wrong in my life that i could talk about, all the car troubles, my other classes, dorm shit, but, it doesn’t matter in the light of these issues. i can get through this. i just gotta keep fighting.

oh and if anyones like, worried, i’m not suicidal, i’m not going to do that, there’s no chance of that hpapening. i’m in a very bad place but i’m never gonig back there if i can fucking help it

#personal #vent #tw whatever idk sensitive materail or something #i just gotta breathe

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