#but i am not nearly as scared to just express myself

[wis-art]

and she's happy about it

#from grim loser #to cuddly girl #she changes a lot lol #i used to be all edgy and stuff #i still wear all black cause it's fun #but i am not nearly as scared to just express myself #art #my art #sketch #lucy wiki #lucy #wiki #i dont know #i wanted to express how i went from always trying to sell how sad i am through my drawings #and my looks and clothes #to just how happy i became and how happy my art became #when i started being myself you know #just comfortable with myself #she has became a little chubbier #and dyed her hair orange #maybe because she's no longer constrained by what she thought she has to be #but there's still a lot of her in what she is now #hehe #trans

[daidonzo]

Doctor, thanks for seeing me today

"She hit her head."

You looked at Usagi, wondering what the best way to kill her would be. Maybe strangling her? No, no way. She was way too strong for that. Drowning her or asphyxiating her with a pillow while she slept were also out of the question. Maybe you could throw her down some stairs or something. If you were at her back and gave her a little push…

"I did not." You pronounced each word clearly, as if they were a sentence on their own, shooting daggers at her.

You had gone bouldering with your friend. She had been asking for a while and you had finally agreed, although you were nowhere near as physically active as she was and were a little bit scared of heights. Not too much, just like any other sane person would be. And boy, were some of those walls high.

She had taught you the basics before getting started.

"It's basically a game of balance, technique, strength and brain."

"I have maybe like one and a half of those things." You had said, not very convinced.

It had actually been quite fun. The place you had visited had the circuits' difficulty organized by colors: white, yellow, orange, red and black, white being the easiest and black being the hardest. You had manage to do all the white ones, and Usagi was nearly beaming with pride.

You had got a little bit too confident, adrenaline pumping through your veins.

"Now I'm going for a red one!"

"I think… Maybe you should just take it slow, progressively. Let's go with yellow?"

But once you set your mind set on something, you always found a way to achieve it.

So you walked towards the artificial rock walls where those were, with your extremely uncomfortable climbing shoes and hands full of chalk to get a better grip on the fake rocks.

Usagi had given up.

"Well, at least there are safety mats…" And shrugged. She knew you too well by now.

You kind of wish she had kept insisting, because while you managed to get pretty far on the red circuit, you also lost balance at some point in time and hit your head against one of the fake rocks. And then you fell. Pathetic. Utterly awful.

It didn't hurt that much, but Usagi still insisted on taking you to the hospital.

"Slow down, cowboy. This is not my first rodeo. You know how clumsy I am, I fall all the time!"

But just like it happened with you, there was nobody stopping her when it came to worrying for her friends. And you loved her for that.

What you didn't love her for was for telling your long-haired, blonde, extremely-handsome doctor every detail about your ridiculous fall.

"She did hit her head. And then she fell. She also scratched her hands, trying to grip at anything while she was falling, but she couldn't do it so…"

"No. That didn't happen like that. I decided to let myself fall because…"

The doctor's brown eyes moved from Usagi to you and from you to Usagi. Was there… A hint of entertainment in his face? Was he actually enjoying this?

"If you don't tell me what happens, I cannot do a proper examination." He finally said, his intense gaze focusing on you.

You looked at his identification badge, squinting your eyes to read what it said.

"You see, Dr. Chishiya…" You started, curving your lips upwards, into the most charming and seductive smile you could manage. "Nothing happened. I'm fine."

He kept looking at you, without changing his expression. He was kind of intimidating.

"Whatever, I hit my head." You finally agreed, rolling your eyes. Usagi laughed, but covered her mouth with her hand, and had the decency to mask it as a cough, at least.

"Could you wait outside?" Chishiya said to your friend, who nodded and left the room.

He started his examination. He checked your vision, your hearing, asked you simple questions, and touched your head to see how it felt. You felt shivers down your spine when his skin came in contact with yours, but didn't say anything.

He was just a doctor, doing his job. There was nothing strange about this. However, you couldn't help but imagine that his fingers lingered for a moment longer on your skin because he liked you, that maybe he was not required to touch you but he also felt the connection, the attraction…

Of course, that was not the case. But there was nothing wrong with creating fake scenarios in your head, as long as you were realistic about it. One had to be.

"You are alright." He determined after the examination, sitting behind his desk. "The spot where you hit yourself is inflamed. It shouldn't hurt more than it does already, but you can take ibuprofen if it does."

"Thanks, doc."

"If there is nothing else…"

But there was something else. You didn't want to just leave. You wanted to get to know him. Maybe get his number? Was it ethical to ask for a doctor's number?

No, really, was it? Maybe since he was not your doctor, but someone who simply had to work today in emergency care…

Your brain was spiraling, fast and furious, trying to find a way.

"What if I hit my head again?" You asked, trying to gain some time.

He lifted his eyes from the piece of paper he was writing something on, perplexed. "Is that something that happens often?"

"More often than you think. It's quite big so I guess it has its own gravitational field and you know, objects get attracted to it."

You didn't have a particularly big head. You used to, back when you were a kid, but your body had grown as well and now everything was more or less balanced.

You still made jokes about it, from time to time.

He looked as if he didn't know how to react.

"Well, then…"

"Do I just come back and ask for Dr. Chishiya?"

"No."

Damn, that was fast. He could have pretended at least to think about it for a few seconds.

"I'm actually still a student."

"Ah."

"Specializing in pediatric cardiac surgery."

"None of those words have anything to do with me, I get it."

One of the corners of his mouth lifted up. Well, at least he found you funny.

"And it wouldn't be very moral."

"What do you mean? Repeating an appointment with the same doctor is not moral?"

"I meant I was waiting until after your visit was over to ask you if you wanted to get coffee. And it would not be appropriate for me to do so if you were my patient."

You blinked, unsure of what you were hearing.

He wanted to ask you for coffee?

"Ah… Okay, sure. Are you…"

"I'm free in half an hour."

"Okay, yeah. I'll… Be by the entrance?"

"See you then."

Was he serious?

You left his office, still not believing what just happened. Usagi was waiting for you by the door.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes, don't worry. I'm having coffee with him in thirty minutes."

"You are what!?"

You lifted your shoulders, your mind devoid of thought. "I don't know…"

Usagi let out a bubbly laugh, feeling all the excitement you should have been experiencing.

She agreed to wait with you by the entrance.

Arisu, her boyfriend, would come pick her up in thirty minutes and you could leave with them if it all turned out to be a cruel joke the handsome doctor Chishiya was playing on you.

It wasn't, because exactly twenty-eight minutes later you heard his voice coming from behind.

"Are you ready to go?"

#chishiya x fem!reader #chishiya x reader #chishiya fanfic #chishiya #aib chishiya #chishiya alice in borderland #chishiya imagine #chishiya fic #chishiya angst #shuntaro chishiya #shuntaro chishiya x reader #chishiya shuntaro #chishiya x you #chishiya x y/n #chishiya fluff #trapped in your spider web #chishiya oneshot

[everythingne]

out of the woods, 5 (ls2)

With clear favoritism boosting all of Ferrari's tactics, Dhanishka makes a difficult decision after a crash causes her to see the true colors of her team. Logan sweeps in to save the day.

series masterlist

warnings/notes: mistreatment of Dhanishka by Ferrari, car accidents with very minor injuries, this chapter was originally twice the length.... i had to cut half of it for next chapter LMAO, wrote this instead of doing my finals !

(ch4) (ch6)

--

The little room they've shoved us all into for media is more crowded than I want it to be. The Chinese GP was off to a rocky start already, with downpour rains all day on Thursday. I'm looking for Charles, turned in on myself even in the room full of flashing lights as I try to hide from the world. I want nothing to do with media. I know its going to be a shit show, and my stomach churns and knots until I make eye contact with Logan across the room. A weird wave of calm hits me, before its also sprinkled with anixety.

We haven't spoke since he kicked me out.

I swallow my pride and smile at him, and though I note his smile isn't full, he does still return one. I can tell he senses my apprehension as he nods, and he excuses himself from Oscar and Alex's sides to cross the small, cramped room. I manage to slip through a wall of reporters surrounding Max, nearly being shoved aside before I'm grabbed and pulled and into the firm protective hold of Logan. Instinctively, his arm wraps tight around my waist as he brings me to his chest. My hands find his shoulders and slide across in a hug as he leans his head down to whisper,

"You look terrified, Isa." His hand squeezes my waist and leaves the skin tingly, as if he's shocked it with little electrodes hidden in his finger tips. All his lingering touches feel like that, they have since I was seventeen.

"I am." I say back to him as I pull back from the hug just enough for us to look at eachother, "It's first media day after we announced this whole... thing."

Logan nods and then sighs, bringing the hand thats not still clutching my waist up to comb through his hair, "This is probably the worst possible time to bring that up, but I'm sorry for just..."

He trails off and before he can finish, I shake my head softly and give him the tiniest reassuring smile I can muster. He quiets at the soft expression on my face as I bring one hand down from his shoulders to pat his forearm, before squeezing it as I speak,

"No, Logan. I should've told you from the beginning what I wanted. It was wrong of me to string you along like that," and I hesitate before adding, "I don't regret it, if you're scared about that, too."

He seems taken aback by my apology, but before we can say more, we're split apart by media duties. I try to turn back to say something when he grabs my wrist to pull me back to him and from Charles, who turns back with a confused look. Even I'm confused, before I'm laughing as Logan's planting a goodbye kiss on my cheek with a softy murmur of 'keeping up the look.' And no matter how hard I try, I can't find a logical defense for my blush.

So of course, Charles teases me about it, which is caught on nearly every camera in our direction as we're brought to the little media pen this time. Luckily out of the grabbing range of asshole reporters and the people who want a headline.

And the first reporter for me is luckily The Ophelia Piastri.

"Danny..!" She sings, handing me a microphone labeled 'VOGUE' as she steps in, ever so elegantly, next to me.

"Hi, Ophie." I smile, leaning in to give her a tight hug. Luckily during media I didn't have to wear my team uniform, so I had been dressed to the nines in the white and red Ferrari dress-jacket-thing, with the little cape thing on the back. I knew I looked good, which is why I assumed Ophelia had grabbed me before she went off to find Lewis.

"Since we last spoke, quite a bit has happened, but lets talk about this outfit?"

"So, this is Ferrari, of course. I cannot remember the name of the jacket for the life of me. It's a white leather trench coat with a red silk trim, Ferrari's black boots with, of course, the red trim, and a black Ferrari purse. I am completely Ferrari today."

"You look stunning, the red of the Ferrari suits has always looked good on your but this pop? Stunning, brilliant, we love to see it."

Her interview is a bit longer than I'm expecting, mostly because we keep getting off track, and then I'm pulled away and into the mass of the boring, normal interviews.

It's Sky News who comes to be annoying, some reporter I don’t recognize. I glance over to Logan, who is on my left side down a bit in the media pen and find him staring. He looks away quickly and I bite back a laugh as Charles knocks my shoulder with his to keep me paying attention. I miss the reporter introducing himself but don’t miss the way Charles tightens his grip on my wrist.

“Any specific reason you were spotted in London last weekend?” The man asks me, holding the microphone towards me and I shrug with a tiny smile.

“Just making some visits to my friends, is all. I also had some media responsibilities.” I reply calmly and catch Logan’s eye again, this time my look lingers long enough to see him try to mouth something to me before the reporter talking pulls me away again.

“A certain driver seems to have caught your eye, though, are we correct to assume there’s some heat between you and a certain Williams driver?” The man smiles almost predatory and Charles taps the back of my arm to signal me to move back as he eyes the reporter with a confused look. As I fall back, I let a soft laugh tumble out of my lips as I realize it’s fucking Anthony Davis and that’s why both Logan and Charles have stopped to watch.

“Thought my instagram post was pretty clear,” I chime once I find my footing and push my emotions back, “if that hallway stuff you released to press as blackmail against Logan to do that interview with you wasn’t already enough.”

Charles is staring like I’ve just cursed this man out, I think I can hear Lando laughing somewhere off to the side.

“We’re done with you, thanks sir, make sure to tell David I said hi.” I grin forcibly, watching as Anthony’s face grows in anger. Charles steps between us, asking Anthony to leave and I allow myself a reprieve here to look around. Logan gives me a little smile and an appreciative nod, which I return, before I’m being pulled away by PR.

-

Qualifying brings back Ferrari’s curse.

Charles tires go and he nearly crashes out right before the end and my back wing is broken by the time I’m done. With the challenges we faced, we both do qualify higher than expected which does make me feel a bit better.

After standing and talking about the car and strategy for way too long, I’m let loose to the solstice of my drivers room. The pristine and almost shockingly tidy room is a safe haven as most the chaos of this weekend and I allow myself to relax as I slowly get myself undone from the race.

I change and take my hair out of its now frizzy braid, taking the time to brush it as I stick my head under the sink faucet to wet my hair. I’m wringing it out as I hear a knock on my door.

“Come in!” I call, grabbing a towel to place over my shoulders as the door pops open and I’m greeted with the soon to be Norris’ couple.

I gawk, “How did you both get in here?”

“Charles owed me a favor for all the times I’ve snuck him into Red Bull.” Olivia shrugs as she pops her purse down next to me on the couch, “and Lando doesn’t like me walking the paddocks by myself anymore.”

“That fucking reporter.”

“Don’t.” Olivia points at Lando, who huffs, and she then crosses the room to sit next to me on the couch before Lando can snag the seat. Olivia continues to speak after pausing to sip her drink, “good take down of Anthony today, little debutante."

“Ah. Thank you.” I laugh softly, brushing my hair with the same red brush, eyes glancing over to Lando and Olivia as I try to keep my blush to a minimum. Olivia's soft compliment made my heart skip, as any praise did. It was hard to come by it in this sport and I was honestly happy it was Olivia who was supporting me like this.

“How’re you feeling? You did pretty good for a busted car. I saw how fucked that rear wing was when I was pulling in the pits after Q1.” Lando continues the conversation and I shrug, turning at Olivia's cue so she can start to braid my hair for me. It's weirdly like having my mom or sister do it, I hate how much it makes me miss home.

“It sucks I’m not higher. Wallahi, I'm so tired of this." I complain, rolling my eyes back as I try and keep myself calm. Frustration wouldn't get me anywhere here, "they’ve been harping on me all season about getting back to the level I was at in Bahrain. And they're acting as if every race since, I haven’t had terrible car issues! Sorry you guys fucked up my car!"

"Sounds like Ferrari." Olivia hums, "I think I've heard both Charles and Carlos say this same thing over the years."

"Maybe talk to Charles about it, he'd know Ferrari better than I would." Lando suggests, watching his fiance as she finishes off my braid and then squeezes my shoulders and pulling me back to rest on her chest as she lazily wraps her arms around me. Lando kicking his legs up to rest on my lap as he yawns into the back of his hand.

"I have been, he's been a huge help, but it's still ridiculous." I complain, smushed against Olivia's Red Bull tee as I close my eyes to fight off the stress migraine forming. I complain for a bit longer, Olivia convincing me to talk to Charles about my frustrations once again. But by the time I've gone off to find him, I notice his attention being held by Fred and some of the engineers. Even when I try to get him away, he's continuously pulled back with soft sorry's thrown over his red clad shoulders.

I go to bed that night with a migraine. The next day I nearly crash twice when my tires are too worn but they won't box me, and sulk in my drivers room after due to losing my podium position. Sure, I finished a lucky P9 for my car issues... but I was fighting with Max in P2 when my rear tires decided they hated me.

I ask so many times to be boxed. It’s not the first time they refuse to pull me into the pits, but it’s the most dangerous. I have no grip, I have nothing but prayers and maybe a bit of luck because I don’t crash out.

And when Aakash is not supportive over the radio, maybe I lose my cool, and maybe that’s what causes half the garage to give me the cold shoulder as I get out of the car. I do what’s needed, barely speak, don’t smile, and then retreat to my room with the hope of my anger dissipating.

When my frustrations don't wear off, even after I snag the treadmill to sprint until my legs are jello, I go to try and find Charles for our little private post-race debrief. I need him in this moment like a fish needs water, the debriefs we have been having being the only thing keeping me from losing my mind in Ferrari. I spot him in the garage still, but he's being held captive by the team. They engross themselves in deep plans for his racing, smiling and waving hands in excitement. I notice no one had come to grab me and swallow the sick feeling in my gut.

"What about Dhanishka?" Charles asks, eyes flickering over to meet mine and I feel the pull to enter the conversation until Fred shakes his head and squeezes his golden boys shoulder, saying,

"Dhanishka comes second to you, Charles. You are more important than some girl. We'll use her to help you..."

Fred's voice fades out as I swallow hard, my hands shaking immediately in a mix of rage and embarrassment. How could I have been so stupid?

And when Charles snaps his head up to meet my eyes after a moment, I've already turned to rush down the hall. Tears prick in my eyes at my own stupidity, that I felt like I belonged in this red building. Sure, it was something off hand, maybe he didn't mean it the way he said it, but it was enough to frustrate me to tears.

If I cry one more time before the end of May, someone might get strangled.

I retire to my hotel room early that night. Even when all I wanna do it party, I choose not to join anyone in the festivities, and ignore the mass amounts of messages blowing up my phone asking why I'm not at the after party. I ignore the world, let the sun set into black skies as I stay tucked in my bed--still in my fireproofs. I can't bring myself to move, a mix of anxiety in my gut and genuine pain in my body keeping me in the plush blankets. My parents call to congratulate me, I humor them with a tired smile and blame it on the time zones. I pretend I'm asleep when I see Anya tries to call me twice. I can't lie to her.

I have to ignore her so they think I'm doing fine. I can't worry them about me turning into the monster I had been after Trident again. But that monster claws at the restraints and slowly breaks them.

Hours later, not that I would know the time, someone knocks at my door. I ignore it, even as the muffled voices call for me and ask if I'm alright. I just stay still, tucked up to my chin in blankets, until someone scans a card in the door and begins to let themselves in. I jump, preparing to throw my phone in defense, when it's Danny who pops his head in.

"Just checking to see if you're alive, mini-me." He smiles, opening the door a bit more so from my vantage on the bed, I can see Charles and Logan behind him. I know they all see I'm still wearing everything I had on at the track, and I see remorse in Charles' eyes when he sees my state, but I shake it off.

"I have a bad migraine, but I'm alive." I say, choosing for that to be the reason as to why I was laying in the dark. Not because I felt too tired to get up to turn the light on, or that I felt my seventeen year old rage returning.

"Need anything?" Logan asks, feather soft, before the others can. I hate how I can see him noticing all my soft lines turning hard. I just sit there, then I shrug when I realize they're expecting an answer.

"Just some sleep. I'll see you guys next race weekend." I wave them off, yawning into the back of my hand. Logan steps into the door frame, welcoming himself in. I don't argue as he crosses the room to sit on the edge of my bed, pressing his hand to my temple.

"You're not sick." He murmurs, "just a stress migraine this time, then?"

"You--huh?" I blink and Logan smiles party, a soft blush on his cheeks only illuminated by the light in the hallway.

"You always get migraines when you're stressed or when you've got a fever, Isa." He squeezes my wrist, watching my face carefully, "If you don't feel hot when you have a migraine, it's just stress."

“It’s just… it’s been a rough weekend and I kinda snapped after the race ‘cause this migraine won’t go away.” I lie half now, Logan seems to buy it a bit more as he leans forward and gently pulls some of my stray hairs back behind my ears—settling them how he knows I like it.

“You did really well for all the issues you were having. Can’t beat yourself up over something you can’t control, Danny.” Daniel says from the doorway where he and Charles lean, I squint when I look towards them in the light and see while Danny looks full of concern—Charles looks sick.

“I know. It’s just been a hard adjustment.” I shrug and Logan nods.

“Adjustings a bitch.” he says and I laugh. About twenty minutes later they leave, after Charles runs down to grab a Doordash they force me to order. Logan calls me much later, telling me to sleep so I don’t feel like shit tomorrow.

We talk on the phone for so long he ends up sleeping in the same bed as me, arm wrapped loosely around my waist as my head is tucked in the crook of his neck. It’s safe. It’s definitely not platonic, but it’s safe, and it’s what I need.

--

-

So far it's been:

Bahrain, P3,

Saudi, P5,

Australia, P8,

Japan, P4,

China, P7,

and now it's Miami, where I land a solid P10 after Carlos clearly attempts to knock me off the track entirely and runs me into the gravel. I have to fight for my way back up from P20. I'm impressed with the run some of the back drivers give me (especially Haas and Alpine) but I'm frustrated in general with my finish.

Because what could've been more is fucked over when Carlos in P9 swings purposefully wide and damages my front wing.

"It's not fair!" I complain to Charles as I pace the length of my tiny drivers room, "I don't know what he has against me!"

"Isa," Charles sighs, running a hand through his hair, "Be proud of what you did accomplish, a wonderful ten place overtake in only seven or so laps! You did amazing tonight, even with that fuck up!"

"You've been podium every race except for Australia when Oscar beat you and Max." I snip, whipping around so hard my braid whacks the side of my face, "What I would do to be able to get up there... its just annoying some drivers have made it their agenda to get me off the track! Carlos has no reason to nearly knock me off the track multiple times today!"

"Carlos is frustrated Ferrari dropped him for you. He'll pretend to be amicable over at Mercedes but he's fucking miserable." Charles sighs, "Ferrari's been no help either, they've yet to pay him the rest of his contract."

"Well how is that my fault, Charles!" I ask, groaning softly as I bury my head in my hands and come to sit next to him. It's not like I had told Ferrari to pick me, it had been a huge surprise they had. Charles has no answer and I just huff and lean back into the couch's plush surface and hide my face.

"I'm miserable too." I complain into the air, and it's frustrating to admit it. Charles can tell I don't wanna talk about it, so he just pulls me to his side and lets me curl up there. I feel like a child, but I feel safe.

—

Miami proves to be more difficult than I expected.

I had qualified really well, starting in P4 with Max, Charles, and Lando ahead of me. I was holding my own during the race, but Ferrari wasn't clearing me to pass Charles to try and take P2. Which is honestly the least of my worries right now. Aakash has been non-exsistant on the radio today, barely answering as per usual. I was basically using my own strategy at this point, pulling off of tips I had been given by Charles for this track.

And everything is surprisingly going well.

“Woah!” I shout, turning clear of whoever is in the Alpine that’s stuck half off the gravel, I make some sort of contact but not enough to deter me, “Alpine is down on the track, hit him, I think front damage? Rear wing is still locked in DRS.”

“Understood. Possible red flag coming up, use these last seconds to try and secure position.” Aakash says into my headset and I reply back with a soft ‘copy’ as I go to turn normally but for some reason I find that I whip to the side—under steering hard. Luckily, by pure coincidence, it keeps Oscar behind me and secures a place in P3 behind Charles. But the car isn’t driveable in this state, extremely dangerous, and my hands shake as I struggle to press down my radio button while holding the wheel steady.

“My steering is going out!” I curse, trying to stabilize myself—waiting for a red flag or a safety or something. Where the fuck is this safety car for the crash?

“How bad is it?” Aakash asks and I grit my teeth as I pull into the next turn. I curse softly, breaking a bit harder than I need to but managing somehow to keep Oscar behind me. I think he knows to stay back, that something is clearly wrong,

“Terrible, terrible! I can’t fight like this!” I snap, groaning as we move now to a straightaway. Oscar comes to my left and I steer towards, Aakash is calling that the flag is flying and the safety car has been deployed, but my eyes are on Oscar as he tries to maneuver around the other side but I cut him off again—or try to.

I steer too hard, clipping the front of Oscar’s tire on the slick of the still drying Florida rain and spinning out. I feel the gravel as the car spins and then the world rocks when I hit the wall. I can't breathe for a moment, breath caught in my chest as I grip my seatbelts. No one calls over the radio for a moment, and then,

"Dhanishka, is the car okay?"

"Fuck you." Is my reply as I grab my restraints and slowly unclick them. It's agony to move as I take out my steering wheel and pop it on the top of the car, hoisting myself up and nearly buckling back down into the car in pure pain. I manage to get myself out by the time medics arrive, they take me to medical to get checked and it's like I'm not even worried about. No one from Ferrari comes to check on me.

I limp myself back to the paddock, guarded by McLaren employees and followed closely by Lando and Olivia--who is softly scolding the FIA in her phone. Her voice thick in frustration over Ferrari's dismissal of me, her hand on my lower back supporting me as I walk. Once they get me back to Ferrari, Olivia forces her way in to escort me to my drivers room.

"I'm gonna get them fined for this bullshit." Olivia mutters, helping me sit down on my bed. I don't reply as she hands me a change of clothes and then gives me a soft hug, the painkillers slowly kicking in and making my dull pain fade. Once I feel a bit better, I wave her off to go home and she reluctantly does.

And my migraine flares when Aakash knocks, entering my room. He's still got his headphones on, and I bite back about thirty insults as he crosses his arms.

"Feel better?"

"No." I huff, "and your precious car is fine."

"Listen, we're pushing you because we need you to be a better driver." The mechanic looks at me, arms taught over his chest and I wish it was still Ami in charge of my comms.

"I don't understand what you want from me!" I shout in frustration, my hand itching to throw my helmet across the room at him. I’m not violent, I never have been, I don’t understand why I’m so short of breath. It feels like the rage in my belly fights to be fed by all the oxygen in my lungs, my hands shaking as he slam my helmet down and punch the plush surface of my bedding.

“Dhanishka—“ Aakash tries and I whip around, pointing at him and watching his face fill with shock as I finally snap under the pressure of the weekend.

“No, listen to me! [You all love Charles, treat him like your golden child! He coughs and you all run to get medicine, but when I am out there and I am struggling and nearly dying, you do nothing! I fought with a broken wing and a fucked up steering wheel and what help did I get?!]” I snap at him in my mother tongue, watching his face fill with something like horror as I step even closer, “[None of you were there for me! You all went to coddle poor Charlie—he was fine! I was the one who suffered for you! Where is my help? You have all done this the whole season!]”

“[Charles was frustrated—]”

I cut Aakash off, screaming, “[And I nearly killed myself out there because none of you would help! Do you think I wasn’t also frustrated?!]”

“Listen, I—“

“Get the fuck out of my room! I’m not doing media! I’m going the fuck back to my hotel.” I snap and Aakash listens, quickly ducking out of the room. I rip off my suit and throw it in my bag and I get changed into my street clothing, only pausing to touch up my makeup. I pass by Charles coming back from podium with a cold shoulder and shove through the crowd to my car, digging out my keys and getting in. I sit there, hands tight on the wheel for a while, and my fingers start to go numb as I feel like my brain is shutting off and going into autopilot.

I just sit back and watch, like a movie goer, as the world around me fades in my mind.

I come back to my senses sharply, knees digging into the tile as I’m sitting on the floor in the bathroom. I can feel the remenants of a panic attack shaking off my limbs, leaving them staticky. My hands shaking at the slamming at the door to my hotel room.

“Isa!”

There’s only one man who calls me that.

I try to shout that I’m gonna let him in but the words are caught in my throat, and I hear him echo and think I’m going crazy as I whine into the bathroom air. Then I realize I’m clutching my phone tight enough to shatter the screen and Logan’s contact is up—blazing bright into my face.

“Lo…?” I wheeze and I hear him pause mid knock before he shuffles and—

“Isa?” He crackles into the phone screen and I nearly sob at the familiarity of his voice.

“I-Give me a second. I’m coming to the door.” I whisper, slowly raising to my feet and stumbling out into the hall as my senses fight to try and come back to me in full. My hands are numb when I un-deadbolt the door and I barely have enough time to step back after I pop the door open. In a flash, Logan is everything around me, tucking me against his chest, his hand carding through my hair, kicking the door shut behind us and sighing softly.

“Oh, Isa—“ He murmurs into my hair and I feel the numbness snap away in favor of tears as I bury into his grasp and sob. I have cried more since starting F1 than I have in my entire life.

“Oh, Isa, I’m so sorry they’ve turned you into me.” Logan presses his hands to either side of my face, lifting me back so I can look at him. I remember how a week ago I was afraid of loving him, how I was terrified I'd lose him, and yet here he was as stubborn and comforting as always.

"I can't do this Logan." I hiccup, letting him bring me into his arms once more, kisses trailing my forehead as he keeps me locked in tight, "I can't take another day of this comparing bullshit! They hate me, all of them in Ferrari. I don't even know if I still have Charles."

"Charles aactually spoke to me this morning about getting you out of Ferrari." Logan murmurs into my hair and I step back, wiping my face as I blink at him.

"What?"

"Ferrari is using you as a way to push Charles up and he hates it. He was seeing who is staying in what teams for next season. Alex might be moving, Williams might have an open seat, and I might've helped to convince them to write 'Dubey' on it." Logan wipes some tears I missed and smiles, kissing my forehead again and I lean into every soft touch of his, "Obviously, they still need to talk to you, but I can set up that meeting if you need help with that."

When I don't reply with words, but rather the quick press of my red lips to his, his eyes widen in shock and a giggle erupts from the back of my throat.

"Have I ever told you that you're amazing?" I whisper, watching blush peek on his cheeks as he wipes a few more tears from my splotchy face and grins.

"A few times, but I don't mind hearing it over and over again.” he grins.

--

f1 made a new post!

liked by oscarpiastri, anyadubey, logansargeant, and 697k others...

f1: hours after it was announced that @ scuderiaferrari is being investigated for mistreatment of @ dhanishkadubey, Dubey announced her departure from the team in the next season, citing 'differing opinions' as the reason for the split.

dhanishkadubey: love u tifosi thank u for an incredible rookie year so far <3

logansargeant: 👀

user1: run girl run

user2: that didn't take long.

charlesleclerc: je te souhaite le meilleur pour ton avenir, petite étoile xx

user3: WAIT?? IS SHE CONTRACTED FOR 2025 BC IT DOESNT SAY SHES LEAVING ENTIRELY??

user4: WHO IS TAKING MY POOKIE.

--

taglist (open, and thank you to those on it now!)

@chasing-liberosis @justsomejess @struggling-with-delia

#f1 fanfic #f1 smau #logan sargeant fic #logan sargeant fanfic #logan sargeant imagine #ls2 fanfiction #ls2 fanfic #ls2 fic

[rainroses45]

My Moonlight

(Neteyam x fem. reader)

☾description: You wander off into the forest and Neteyam is out looking for you….this takes place 10 years later

☾a/n: I promised fluff so here it comes

☾song inspiration: Neytiri’s song cord and melting

:･ﾟ✧:･.☽˚｡･ﾟ✧:･.:

You twirled through the forest as a gentle hum played in your mind. Your hands scattered through the different plants feeling their unique textures. The simple breeze of fresh air flowed through your messy hair. A smile spread across your face as you stopped your movement and stared off into the distance. The beautiful sun began to settle down for bed, but still giving you an hour or two to rejoice in its natural glow.

“Ngati oel munge soaiane.” You sang gently as you sat slowly onto the ground, needing a little rest from the climbing and walking. Your baby bump caused you to struggle a bit, but you still managed to get comfortable. The beautiful flowers blossomed around you, heavenly disposing their scent onto your smooth skin. The forest stayed quiet as you sang it a song.

“Lie si oe atanur,” your voice carried through the forest surrounding you. The moss underneath you was so soft and laced in bright green. A soft small kick was felt on your stomach. You smiled down rubbing one hand on your bump.

“Pähem parul, tì'ongokx ahuta.” The flowers swayed towards the melody as the wind grew quiet. Your necklace rattled gently with the wisps of the breeze. The feeling of freedom and glee made you glow in the evening dew.

“Lawnol a mì te'lan,” your soft voice sang as the sun slowly began to leave you for the night. It was the moon’s time to shine.

“Lawnol a mì te'lan,” you sang the lyric once more, wood spirits flowed towards your direction like graceful dancers.

“Ngaru irayo seiyi ayoe, tonìri tìreyä,” the world around you began to glow in vibrant colors. It’s soothing pigments lured you into a sleepy trance.

“Ngaru irayo seiyi ayoe,” you were so tired and liberated from the world around you. The need to close your eyes grew stronger and stronger every passing second.

“Srrìri tìreyä, ma Eywa, ma Eywa.” You let out a yawn as you finished the song, nestling up next to a tree you allowed yourself to drift into dreamland.

༶•┈┈୨♡୧┈┈•༶

“There you are my love,” a familiar voice said as you opened your eyes to greet the special intruder. He gently placed his hand on your shoulder softly waking you back up.

“Neteyam, you nearly scared me to death,” you weakly laughed as you turn yourself to lay on your back. A yawn escaped from you as you rubbed your eyes open.

“I could say the same thing,” he commented back “I told you to not travel too far, with you being almost ready to deliver, I do not need you to be far away in pain.” His expression lightened up after seeing you and the baby were more than alright.

“I know, but I just wanted to adventure out for a bit.” You explained lifting yourself up with the help of your husband into a sitting position. “I’m just tired of being cooped up all day staring at the same wall.”

“I understand my love, but tell me when you are going to wander off so I may accompany you or send one of my siblings too.” He pushed back a strand of your hair behind your ear, admiring your beautiful features.

“I don’t need a baby sitter Neteyam.” You stated in an annoyed tone. “I am perfectly fine by myself.” You looked away from your mate, wanting to enjoy the beautiful night sky before you were sent back to your prison.

“And I didn’t say you weren’t capable sweetheart, I know fully well who I chose to spend the rest of my life with. You are a strong warrior Y/n, but-“

“There is no but, I just want to be able to have some privacy.” You responded back with tears in your eyes. The moon light shines across the sorrowful liquid.

“I understand that Y/n. I just don’t want to be told that my lover is in labor alone with no one to help her.” He argued back grabbing your hand in his, intwining your fingers in a tight hold.

“I’m sorry,” you apologized looking down at your baby bump, grabbing Neteyam’s free hand and placing it on your stomach allowing him to feel his baby’s kicks.

He looked back at you with gleaming eyes and a soft smile. You had the sweetest soul he has ever seen, he thought as he cradled your right cheek carefully. Gently bringing your faces together, your lips touched in a passionate delicate kiss. He held your face as you melted in the feeling of love.

The kiss was soft, he held you like a fragile flower who’s petals only began to bloom. Neteyam loved to lavish you with his love. You are his sweet caring mate who deserves nothing less than the world after all. He was so proud of you, so very proud of you for carrying his child.

He did everything for you, feeding every one of your cravings no matter how weird they were, massaging your sore feet as you cried out in pain over the cramps. His protectiveness over you increased once he figured out you were gifted with the blessing of having life. Oh how he loved you, you were his moonlight who paired so well with his stars.

A blush blemished your face as you parted away from the kiss. Your hands still intwined with one another.

“Nga yawne lu oer,” you whispered softly as you shifted yourself into his arms, trying to drift back into your wonderful nap.

“I love you to Y/n.”

:･ﾟ✧:･.☽˚｡･ﾟ✧:･.:

a/n: if i was only this motivated to finish essays this fast…welp

#neteyam #neteyam x reader #neteyam x you #neteyam x y/n #fluff #na'vi avatar #avatar #neteyam sully #family #pandora #avatar way of water #omaticaya

[venerawrites]

hi! could you write a naruto x reader fic where reader just moved to konoha and saw naruto being bullied and decides to help him? maybe they become friends after and naruto develops a crush on reader

thank you thats all!

author's note: my exams are getting near and I have not been super active lately, but writing this was a nice break for my brain and actually gave me a chance to recharge. I absolutely love Naruto and I am so happy I finally got my first request for him! I really hope you enjoy! x

warnings: none, but what was supposed to be fluff did turn into some light angst? (sorry, can't control myself); also gn! reader and characters aged to be over 18 towards the end;

"It should've been you, freak!"

The words were followed by a shove to the boy's chest, but it didn't hurt nearly as deep as the statement said. In a way, Naruto agreed with what the other kid was saying - maybe it shouldn't have been him buried deep underground, instead of the dozens of innocent lives that were taken by the demon sealed inside of him. Maybe death is indeed the better option compared to his life filled with loneliness and being hated by everyone in the village.

"Just leave me alone!", his voice came out weaker than he intended to and caused nothing but laughter by the five boys surround him.

"Or what, whisker boy?"

Naruto opened his mouth to reply, but quickly closed it again, once no good comeback came to his mind.

What was he going do?

He could try and fight them like last time, but with five versus one, he was bound to lose again. He could also run… but with 3 of the boys being a few years older and already training at the Academy, they would surely catch him. Alternatively, he could just sit and a hope for a miracle to happ-

“Get lost.”

The little pebble you held in your hand flew toward the head of one of the boys, forcing him to turn around with annoyance written all over his face. It took a few seconds for Naruto to locate where the voice came from, but once he spotted you, his breath hitched in his throat.

Just like an angel, sent straight from Heaven, you stood in the middle of the street, eyeing all of the boys with an unimpressed expression and with one of your hands playing with two more pebbles between your fingers. You must have been just a visitor since the blonde boy was sure he would have remembered you if he had seen you before. His eyes fell down towards the front of your vest, where a small scorpion was embodied in gold.

A clan symbol, that's for sure. But which?

"Who the heck are you?", the boy you hit yelled, his palm still rubbing the sore spot at the back of his head, "Go away before we make you go away."

A loud scoff escaped past your lips and before he could react, you threw a second stone at him, this time successfully hitting his left eye.

"Ow!", he screamed, and a few of his friends immediately rushed to his side, checking if he was okay. Moving their attention to you, their bodies tensed, instinctively taking a fighting stance. Naruto, on the other hand, stood behind them, still unsure of what was going on.

"I give you exactly ten seconds to run before I make you go away", you mimicked their earlier words, a note of challenge in your voice. Your threat was met with nothing but laughter and you narrowed your eyes at them, your fingers reaching to the little pouch attached to the side of your waist.

"Ha, like you can scare us aw- OW!", with no chance to finish, the boy, who you assumed was the leader of the gang, was hit again, this time in his other eye, making him stumble back. Calculating the distance between you and the other males, you expertly threw the rest of the stones in your hand in their direction, hitting each one without a miss.

Before he could realise what was happening, Naruto found himself facing you alone, his bullies now running quickly down the street. They kept shouting some curses and threats back at you, their words mixing together and making it impossible to actually understand what were they saying. You didn't look too bothered about it either, your eyes boring into the blonde boy.

"Heh, t-thanks for that...", Naruto nervously murmured with a crooked smile, his hand rubbing the back of his neck. He was not sure if you were going to attack him next, but judging by your more relaxed stance now, he hoped not. Your face remained stoic, your eyes tracing his face and dirty outfit, the corners of your mouth twitching in disgust.

"You need a shower", was all you said, before turning around and starting walking towards your house. It took a few seconds for the blonde boy to assimilate your words, his head shaking once he realised that you intended this to be the end of your conversation.

"Hey! Wait!", he yelled, his feet hurrying after you, "What's your name?"

You did not stop, but your steps did slow down. Casting him a side glance, you raised an eyebrow at him in question.

"Why do you need my name?"

"Well, you know...", the boy trailed off, but your facial expression remained unchanged. Clearing his throat, he shoved both his hands in his pockets, while still walking next to you. He stayed silent for a minute, wondering how to word his thoughts. Did he actually need a reason to ask for your name? Was there even a right answer to that?

"So we can be friends! I assume you are new here, but that's okay because you can't have a better guide around Konoha than me and-"

"I don't need new friends", you immediately shot him down, your focus moving from him to the road ahead. The feeling of his curious stare burned at the side of your face, yet you refused to elaborate further.

"Well, I...", his movements stopped and he remained frozen in his place. The way you turned his offer down so quickly hurt more than he expected from someone he didn't even know. There was something cold and unfriendly about you and he couldn't decide if it was directed toward him, or if it was just who you were.

Have you heard about him and the demon inside of him already? You didn't look scared of him, but it was also clear you wanted nothing to do with him. Maybe you thought he was weak because of the way he let those kids talk to him?

"It's Y/N", your voice took him out of his thoughts and he lifted his gaze up to you. After seeing the confusion in it, you clarified, "My name is Y/N."

A small smile formed on his face and he closed the distance between you once again, reaching his hand toward you.

"I am Naruto", he shivered at the feeling of your smaller hand placing itself into his, "Naruto Uzumaki."

You nodded your head, despite already knowing well enough who he was. It has been only a week since you moved from the Village Hidden in the Rain to Konoha, but your parents had already made you aware of the rumours going around the village of the so-called "fox demon boy". Looking at the whiskers on his face, it didn't take long for you to realise it was him.

"The gates in front of the academy. Eight o'clock tomorrow morning. Don't be late", you instructed calmly, pulling your hand away from his grasp.

"Huh?"

You rolled your eyes at his dumbfounded look.

"I could use a guide around the village", you shrugged your shoulders, before turning around once again, "But if you are even one minute late, I would leave."

Needless to say the next day was the first time Naruto actually showed up for something on time.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Two years have passed since the first time you met Naruto. Surprisingly for him and many of the other villagers, an unlikely friendship formed between you despite your contrasting personalities.

Naruto was like the sun - bright, positive, bringing light into everyone's life. Despite what others have put him through, he remained dreaming big, eager to prove himself as the strongest ninja in Konoha. While he still encountered unfriendly stares and was avoided by the majority of the kids, he radiated optimism and never shut his mouth about how one day everyone was going to admire him.

You, on the other hand, were... well, you.

Raised as the oldest daughter of the Doku clan, one of the few wealthy clans in Amegakure, your life drastically differed from the one of your blonde friend. Moving to Konoha after the political tension in your home village threatened the influence held by your father, your parents made sure to continue your comfortable life by purchasing a large compound in the outskirts of the Leaf Village.

Too busy to climb the social ladder, your parents have left you in charge of looking after your two younger sisters, thus never really giving you the chance to enjoy a carefree childhood. Sure, you were aided by the many maids who helped around the house, but having to constantly keep an eye on your siblings made you mature way quicker than expected. It was no surprise that even since your early childhood you developed a moody personality, your state of mind shifting only between annoyance and boredom.

Nothing really impressed you, nor could make you sad. Interactions with people were draining the little energy and patience you had left and you avoided them as much as possible, preferring to sit in your compound's garden by yourself, immersed in one of your many books about nature, plants and poison making.

Despite that, you were not heartless. So when you saw Naruto for the first time, being cornered by these five boys, you knew you had to intervene, despite having no intention to get to know him. But the moment you saw his expression after you made it clear that you were not interested in forming friendships, something inside you stirred with guilt and despite your better judgment, you decided to give it a shot.

You often wondered if that was a mistake, especially in moments like this, when Naruto was loudly complaining to you about the team he has been assigned in, pieces of the food he was chewing falling out of his mouth while talking.

"Can you believe it? Me and that teme in the same team together! This has to be a joke!", he moaned, stuffing his mouth with more ramen, half of which flew towards you, while he kept trying to talk and eat and the same time.

You looked in disgust at the small piece of noodle that rested on your sleeve, carefully picking it up and throwing it away.

"Can you stop talking with your mouth full?", you asked in annoyance, rolling your eyes. Naruto hummed under his breath but showed no signs of following your request. At this point he was so used to your grumpy comments, that often they went in into one ear and came back out of the other.

"And Sakura doesn't even pay attention to me, too busy to fawn over that duck-butt looking jerk!", he lifted the bowl in his hands to his mouth and obnoxiously slurped the remaining food at the bottom. You quietly chewed your chicken while you listened to his complaints.

The relationship between him and the Uchiha has been confusing, to say the least. Before being assigned to a team together, they rarely interacted, showing no real interest in each other. Since Team 7 was formed, however, they were constantly clashing with each other and turning even the slightest things into a competition.

"What do you think?", he asked you, face leaning towards yours, while his hands moved to grab the second bowl of ramen.

"About what?", you asked with a sigh, your chopstick twirling your food in a bored manner. Naruto rolled his eyes, stuffing a large piece of pork into his mouth.

"About Sasuke, duh!", he said like it was the most obvious thing in the world, "I don't really understand how girls are always after him!"

You shrugged your shoulders in response.

"I don't think about him", was all you said, returning your focus to your food. Naruto glanced at you, his mouth opening to ask you something else, but his cheeks suddenly flushed red, and he closed it again. You noticed his weird reaction, but did not comment on it, leaving him to be the one to break the silence once again.

"What about your team? Are they nice?", he cleared his throat, surprising you with the sudden change of topic. While Naruto was extremely kind, he usually preferred to talk about himself and what was going on in his life, rather than show interest in someone else.

"They are alright", you put the last bit of chicken into your mouth, before pushing your plate away. Having only two other students in the whole class who were not natives of Konoha, it was no surprise they decided to pair you together, thinking that this was something you could bond over.

Luckily for you, both of your teammates were just as uninterested in forming friendships as you. Hisa, the oldest one in your group and originally born in Suna, was an excellent swordsman and pretty good in taijutsu, making him the front fighter of your team and in some way the self-proclaimed leader of it. He rarely talked, unless he was sharing battle strategies, preferring to rely on actions rather than words.

Mako, the other boy in your team, was the most timid and shy one in the team, yet somehow the most sociable. Born in the Village Hidden in the Mist as part of the Yuki Clan, he moved here when he was just an infant. He was the only one in your team that possessed a Kekkei Genkai, and while not master at it in any way, he was an extremely valuable addition to your team and probably the best sparring partner out of you three.

You, on the other hand, were the long-shot weaponry fighter of the team. Specializing in poison making, just like the rest of your clan, your skills lay in ambushing and immobilizing enemies from far away with the help of your poison needles.

While you still could handle yourself pretty well in hand-to-hand combat, even against opponents like Hisa, you rarely had to do that, your expert aim almost never missing your targets. You were also the only one in the team who knew basic medical ninjutsu, a skill which your sensei often encouraged you to pursue further, but you refused.

"Kami, sometimes it's exhausting to be your friend, you know?", Naruto groaned, unsatisfied with the short answers you kept giving him. He expected you to give him an annoyed look or even slap him on the arm, but was caught by surprise once your melodic laugh reached his ears.

This was the first time he has EVER heard you laugh.

"Could say the same about you", you shook your head, stealing a piece of tomato from his bowl.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Everything changed once Sasuke left the village, including the friendship you had with Naruto. His unjustified (to you) determination to bring him back completely baffled you and forced you to completely lose your temper once he told you he was leaving the village in order to get stronger.

"You are delusional", you hissed, crossing your arms in front of your chest, "You are leaving your whole life behind for what? To bring a traitor, who wants nothing do to with you, back home?"

Naruto's eyes hardened and his hands shoved the last bit of clothes into his backpack, not caring if they were about to be wrinkly. He had invited you to his place to share his decision with you and while he knew you were not going to agree, he did not expect you to react that harshly.

It was not a secret that you did not harbour warm feelings toward any of Naruto's teammates. The Uchiha was a skilled and powerful ninja, but too blinded by his own emotions and ego, to be able to appreciate the reality of his life. He thought he was better than everyone else and seemingly this also included you since he never missed a chance to jab at you or Naruto when he saw you together. You, on the other hand, also did not hold back, giving him the cold shoulder and making him feel just as small and pathetic as he was making everyone else around him feel.

Naturally, Sakura did not like you since you were treating Sasuke that way, but that hardly bothered you since in your eyes she was both weak and annoying. And while there were dozens of girls, just as obsessed and in love like her, there was something about her that made the ugly feelings of rage and jealousy burn inside your chest. Maybe it was the fact that Naruto always talked about how pretty and confident she was, or maybe it was the fact that you were more than convinced she did not deserve even a minute of attention from your best friend... you did not know what it was exactly, but there was a reason for you not liking her.

"It's not just that...", he sighed, taking a sit next to you on the bed, "I just... I need to get stronger. Even Kakashi-sensei agrees going with Jiraya would help me improve my chakra control and makes me a better ninja. One, that deserves to be a Hokage."

"What does Kakashi-sensei even know?", you countered, "His whole life he has always been here."

Naruto looked at you with his eyes full of regret and disappointment. His arm tried to reach out to you, but you quickly pulled away, standing from the bed.

"You are never going to be strong, Naruto."

"What?", he furrowed his brows, your words taking him completely off guard. The way you said that through gritted teeth and your narrowed eyes made you look like you were facing your biggest enemy.

And Naruto did not like that.

"You are never going to be strong!", you repeated, this time your voice raising, "Because you keep wasting your energy and efforts on stuff that don't matter. You keep chasing people like Sasuke and Sakura, who don't give a damn about you! You keep overlooking the people that actually care about you! People like me!"

You ended your rant with panting body and teeth biting into your bottom lip, stopping you from saying anything else that you knew you were going to regret later. You hoped that like many other things you said, Naruto wouldn't actually register your words, but unluckily for you, this time he was carefully listening.

"You care about me?", he repeated, his eyes boring into yours. Unable to face the consequences of your words, you stared at him for a whole minute, before slowly nodding your head.

"I...", he loudly gulped, a light rosy colour covering his cheeks and ears, "Like... Like a friend? Or.. like something else?"

The silence that followed his question made you both fidget uncomfortably in your places. You kept biting your lip, the metallic taste of your blood soon filling your mouth.

What was going on? Where has the control you usually had over your thoughts and words gone? You didn't know how to answer his question, without utterly and completely destroying your friendship.

"I...", for the first time since he had known you, Naruto saw you speechless. You turned your head, the pressure of his gaze too intense for you to handle. Taking a breath, you managed to gather your thoughts together and carefully proceed:

"Like someone who I want to grow and hopefully spend my life with in the future...", you explained, your voice carrying an unusual softness and vulnerability, "I... don't make me actually say it, Naruto."

You didn't know what you expected. Maybe for him to stand up and embrace you in a hug, telling you that he shares your feelings. Or for him to storm off, his normal reaction when he feels stressed and cornered.

It was a surprise, however, when you heard his voice right behind you.

When did he even got up from his seat?

"Y/N...", your name rolled out as a broken whisper out of his lips and you already knew that nothing good was about to follow.

"Don't!", you tried to stop him before he could put the final nail into your already cracking heart.

“You have no idea-“

“Don’t do that!”

“..what your friendship means to me”, he finished his sentence, laying one of his palms flat on your shoulder, "But I... I just don't see you that way."

You flinched away from his touch, eyes still refusing to meet his. Your heard him take a breath and it sounded like he wants to say something else, but thought better of it. Both of you stayed silent - him, because he was too scared to hurt you even more, you, because you desperately tried to control the building tears that threatened to spill out on your cheeks.

"There is nothing I can say to change your mind about staying, is there?", you finally said, the question sounding more like a statement. Naruto did not reply, instead taking a step back and returning to packing his bag.

Without another word, you bolted towards the door, promising yourself that this was to be the last time you allowed your heart to be vulnerable.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Naruto found himself surprised once he came back to the village.

Sakura was now an extremely strong kunoichi, the best student of Lady Tsunade. His friend, Gaara, has become the Kazekage and many of his classmates have already been promoted to the rank of Jonin.

It seemed everybody was growing and starting to cave their own path. And while he managed to catch up with pretty much everyone and everything during his few weeks back, he was yet to see you.

The blond Uzumaki would lie if he said he hadn't thought about you during his time away. He had... a lot. Your last conversation kept replaying in his mind, your bored face appearing in his mind every time he closed his eyes, sometimes even blessing him with one of these rare smiles he knew were reserved just for him.

Your words that day shocked him. Never had he imagined he would be the subject of someone's affection, let alone yours. You were always so reserved and composed around him, that it took him years to crack your personality, and even then, he was not sure you were fully letting him in.

Naruto was a confident being, which included his feelings. He was always sure of what he felt and why he felt it. Yet, he couldn't explain why you haunted his thoughts way more than his other friends, including Sakura. The crush that he thought he had on his teammate was not shadowed by the big question mark of who were you to him.

On one hand, you were his closest friend. You were also grumpy and pouting the majority of the time, but for some reason, he found that cute and often took it as a challenge to make you smile. You were very blunt, which sometimes hurt his ego, but he appreciated your honesty. Also, unlike Sakura, you never physically hurt him, even though he had to admit just your glare was often enough to stop him from doing whatever he was about to do.

On the other hand... well, he couldn't really think about something bad about you or your personality. Other than the fact that you reminded him too much of Shikamaru, by being constantly bored and finding yourself lacking the enthusiasm to do stuff.

"You can take Y/N out of the Hidden Rain Village, but you can't take the Hidden Rain Village out of Y/N" - Naruto often joked about you, saying that he finds your moody personality reminding him of these comforting rains, that makes you want to stay in bed all day and do nothing. You were never sure if that was a compliment or not, but with your friend having a more unique way of thinking, you never really asked him to elaborate.

After a few more weeks of not seeing you, Naruto decided it was finally time to knock on your door. Were you avoiding him? He has been out every day asking his friends about you, but they couldn't provide any information, saying that they rarely see you anyway because of how many missions your team was taking.

The door to the Doku compound opened and suddenly Naruto was tackled by two giggling girls. He landed on his bum and with a wide smile, he hugged them back, supporting their weight while both of them just hung on his neck.

"Naruto!", they both screamed in unison, "You are back!"

Chaya and Kaya were your two younger sisters, who were also Naruto's biggest fangirls. From the first time they met him when they could barely walk, they were constantly clinging to him, admiring him and even getting jealous if he had to leave them to hang out with you. The blonde ninja also enjoyed spending time with them, feeling them as close as if they were his own siblings.

"Hey, easy!", he laughed, carefully untangling their hands from his neck and crouching in front of them. He ruffled both of his heads, chucking once they whined he was ruining their hairstyles.

"Are you going to stay for dinner?" "I have this new ninja doll - do you want to see it?" "Are you going to tell us some stories of your travels?"

The two children bombarded him with questions and he kept looking between Chaya and Kaya, unsure who was asking what. Almost like she knew he needed to be saved, your mother showed up at the door, pushing the two girls back and giving Naruto an apologetic smile.

"Naruto, glad to see you! It's been a while."

"Lady Doku", the boy greeted, bowing his head, "It is good to see you too!"

Your mother stepped aside, a silent invitation for Naruto to enter and he took it without a second thought. Looking around, he was glad to see that your home was the same as he remembered it. Despite being somewhat scared of your parents in the beginning due to their reservations based on the rumours going around Konoha, your whole family has welcomed him and made sure he had a full stomach on more than one occasion. They also have paid for his ninja uniform in the past, as well as provide him with a warm bed in the spare guesthouse during the coldest months, when his apartment was freezing.

"Are you going to stay for dinner?", Lady Doku asked, leading Naruto to the dining room, "Y/N and Hisa would be here soon. They are just giving their mission report to the Hokage."

Ah, so that's why he hadn't seen you around! You were on a mission!

"Can't wait to see her!", Naruto smiled brightly, taking a seat at the dinner table, "I have been wondering where she is! I was going around the whole village trying to find her, heh!"

He took the glass of water in front of him and gulped almost half of it at once. He was nervous and he was sure your mother could tell by the way he was rambling and his voice went higher than normal. Still, she said nothing of it, instead turning towards the door, once your father entered the room with a huff.

"Are they here yet?", he grumbled under his breath, looking at his wife with an annoyed expression, "They have been giving this report for an hour. Are they writing it now or something?"

Your mother cleared her throat and gave him a scolding look, her eyes briefly moving to Naruto to show him that they were not alone. The man stared at her with confusion for a few seconds, not understanding what she is trying to say.

"What, woman?", a movement at the end of the table caught his attention and he finally turned around, only to see your childhood friend sitting awkwardly, giving him a small wave. Your father suddenly smiled, his mood improving drastically, and he went round the table, patting the blond boy on the back.

"Ah, the Uzumaki boy!", he laughed, squeezing his shoulder, "We were wondering when you are going to show up. Dinners without you have been dull, you know?"

Naruto smiled at his words and bowed his head to him as a sign of respect. Your father started asking him questions about his time away with Jiraya and what he had learned during this time, and the boy enthusiastically started to explain all the new jutsu techniques he mastered and all the adventures he had with his sensei.

Soon Chaya and Kaya ran into the room, almost tripping in their hurry of who was about to sit next to Naruto. Chaya, however, being the taller one, managed to beat her sister, which resulted in loud bickering and dramatic cries from Kaya. Naruto looked at them with a smile but was quickly brought back to the conversation with your dad, once he asked him about his future plans as a ninja.

"Girls, stop!", your mother sighed and rubbed her temples, "Kaya, just sit next to Hisa today."

"I don't want to sit next to Y/N's boyfriend, I want to sit next to Narutooooo!", she moaned, crossing her arms in front of her chest with a huff.

Hearing the word "boyfriend", Naruto's head suddenly whipped in her direction, his throat tightening and making him choke on his own spit. He started coughing and his fist made its way to his chest, hitting it a few times in an attempt to help him swallow. Everyone's eyes went on him and your father's heavy hand went to his back, slapping him so hard he was thrown forward, almost banging his head on the table.

"Hit him one more time and he may fly through the wall", your monotone voice sounded next to the entry and Naruto immediately lifted his eyes, his mouth opening slightly once he saw you leaning on the door frame.

You were taller and leaner than the last time he saw you, your long hair now sitting in a high bun on top of your head. A golden bracelet in the form of a scorpion, the symbol of your clan, shined on your wrist, partly covered by your long sleeves.

What didn't change, however, was the unimpressed look that you currently gave him. The blonde tried to offer you a small smile, but you had no reaction, other than sighing and taking the seat opposite him. Closely behind you was Hisa, your teammate, and what Naruto learned to be your "boyfriend".

"Naruto is here!", yelled Kaya, taking her seat on the table, not even acknowledging Hisa.

"Really? Wouldn't have noticed", you said flatly, your eyes boring into his. Naruto shifted uncomfortably under your gaze, suddenly feeling like a nuisance by coming to your house. Sensing the tension, your father decided to shift the focus on you.

"So, how was your mission? I thought it was supposed to be only a week and you were gone for a few", he lifted his eyebrow, motioning the maid in the corner of the room to bring the meals to the table.

"The mission did indeed finish in a week", Hisa finally spoke, his face stoic, "But I wanted Y/N to meet my family back in Suna. They are excited about a potential future union between our clan and the Doku."

"I bet there are", your father mumbled under his nose, rolling his eyes while taking a bite of his salad.

Naruto, who has been sitting silent the whole time and drinking his second glass of water in an attempt to calm his nerves, now spat the liquid forward, showering both you and your partner in water.

"A union?", he asked, his voice loud and squawky, "What? Between you two?"

"Why is that hard to believe?", you asked, your eyes narrowing at him.

The truth is you were anything, but happy Naruto was here tonight. You've heard from Mako that he was searching for you and that he grew up a lot, no longer the silly boy anymore, but a man. And you had to agree - laying your eyes on him tonight, a sudden rush of your old feelings hit you like a wave. The love you thought you buried deep inside of you, suddenly resurfaced and it made you angry.

Angry, because it was not fair to you, or to Hisa, or even to your family, who seemed so excited and glad that the blonde ninja was back into your lives. You couldn't help but feel betrayed by them, especially since both your mother and father knew how broken you were once he left the village.

"Well, I don't know...", Naruto's combative personality woke up in the face of your challenging words, completely forgetting he was surrounded by other people, "Maybe it is hard to believe because both of you are completely incompatible!"

"Naruto, you need to calm down!", Hisa's voice was stern, carrying a note of threatening in it. The blonde boy, however, completely ignored that, instead furrowing his brows.

"I am calm!", he grumbled, fixing him with a glare.

The whole idea of you and Hisa was just... wrong. How did you two even fall for each other? Both of you were introverted, silent, and cold individuals, who, by what he could observe tonight, had zero chemistry between each other. Even the way you sat with almost a chair distance between you was weird in his eyes, especially since he knew you had no problem with physical contact, his own arm resting on your shoulder countless times before, even in front of your mom and dad.

"Don't be mad, because I was there to pick up the pieces you left behind!"

Silence.

Everyone looked at Hisa with surprise, even you. Never, for all the years you had known him, have you heard him be so aggressive and arrogant with his words. Naruto, also seemed shocked, but he quickly regained composure, a fire of rage burning behind his eyes.

"Shut up! You don't know anything!", he shouted, pointing his finger at your lover, "Hell would freeze before I believe she is with you because she likes you! Did you force her?"

His gaze shifted towards you, both of his brows lifting high.

"Did he threaten you? Blackmail you?"

"Don't be silly!", you scolded him under your breath, your cheeks now crimson red from embarrassment by the fact all of this was taking place in front your family members, who seemed invested in the little row by now, "Can we just eat our food in peace?"

"No!", it was Hisa who spoke first and you tried to elbow him, unhappy with his sudden confidence and eagerness to fight, but he paid you no mind, "Me and Y/N like each other. And Naruto needs to take his nose out of our relationship, before I make him to!"

You buried your head in your hands, casting a pleading look toward your dad, who actually seemed to be finding the whole thing amusing, judging by the small smirk on his face.

"Like each other?", Naruto scoffed, now glaring daggers at the other male, "A piece of cardboard has more personality than you, how could anyone like you?"

"Ha!", Chaya laughed with her mouth full, "That's true! Hisa IS boring!"

Kaya hummed in agreement, while both your parents tried to stifle a laugh. Your boyfriend, however, seemed anything but impressed by the comment and he looked at you, expecting you to defend him. You let out a sigh of annoyance, shrugging your shoulders.

How can you defend him from a fact that was true?

"Me and you. Outside. Now!", Hisa commanded, pushing his chair back and standing up. Naruto seemed to be about to do the same, when your father's voice boomed around the room.

"Sit down!", he said and Hisa reluctantly followed, his eyes still boring holes into Naruto's head, "Enough of your silly boy fight! Dinner time is family time, it is not an opportunity for you to show off in front of Y/N! Show some respect to this household!"

"Daaad!", you whined, wanting nothing more than the ground to open and swallow you. Both boys, seemingly hit by realisation of their behaviour after hearing your father's words, mumbled an apology before focusing on eating their food.

The whole dinner continued in silence, cut only by your mother who was desperately trying to lighten the mood by talking about some new market shops that opened in the village, but everyone else seemed to lack enthusiasm, choosing to remain quiet instead. Even your two siblings, who normally did not have their mouths shut, were now communicating only with glances with each other.

What was once a warm and welcoming home for Naruto, now felt weird for him to be in. So as soon as he finished his meal, he said his thanks and goodbyes, eager to get away from you and your boyfriend. Dozens of questions filled his brain and soon a headache started to form, making him rub his forehead in frustration.

What the hell has happened during these three years while he was away? He knew he hurt you that day when he said he did not return his feelings, but was it really that bad, that you felt nothing but resentment towards him now?

He was almost by the gate of your garden, when he heard your voice again.

"Why did you come?"

He turned around, finding with relief that you were by yourself. Your body language, however, was stiff and unwelcoming. You were ready for a confrontation.

"I wanted to see you", he admitted, not shying his gaze away from yours, "I... missed you."

A dry chuckle left past your lips and you shook your head. Making a few steps towards him, your sharp stare was focused on his blue eyes, searching for any signs of lies. You stood there quietly observing him, trying to gather your thoughts and clarify your own feelings.

Did you miss him? Of course, you did, every single day. Were you about to tell him? Absolutely no way.

"I am in love with you", he suddenly blurted out, catching you off guard. You took a sharp breath, unsure if he really said it or if you imagined it. Using your moment of shock as an opportunity to close the distance between you, he cautiously took one of your hands in his.

"I know I hurt you and I was dumb for not seeing what I had all along... But during these few years away, only one person haunted my thoughts. Only one person motivated me to do better, to grow into the man that they deserve, and to finally get the courage to admit in front of them and myself that I am utterly, hopelessly and crazy in love with them."

His hand rested under your chin, lifting your head towards him once you tried to look down, hiding your now blushing face from him.

"That person is you."

You let out the air that you did not even realize you were holding, his close proximity and the feeling of his touch on your hand making you feel almost like you were floating. You had the gather all of the courage you had left, in order to pull away rather than smash your lips into his.

"I can't."

Naruto looked at you with confusion, taking another step towards you, making you step back in return. He stood still for a few seconds, before pushing his hands in his pockets and looking down at his feet.

"You... You don't feel the same way?"

You stared at him for a minute, wondering if it would be easier to just lie and say "yes". Yet your heart begged you to tell him the truth, eager to be free of the weight of the feelings you have been carrying for years.

"The feelings I have for you would never go away. I have been loving you since we were children and I would love you till we are both old sacks of bones", you chuckled at your own words and suddenly the atmosphere between you felt lighter, almost like the old days. Naruto looked at you, a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

"But I am with Hisa...", his smile quickly turned into a frown, "And things have changed. I changed... and I know you did too. No matter how bad I want to believe you, I think you need to really listen to your heart."

"But I have, I do lov-"

"Were you about to say that to me if I was not taken by somebody else?", your words were harsh and cold, but also true. Naruto closed his mouth, looking down. It is true his confession came out as a result of his jealousy tonight, but he was also confident in the fact that he did had feelings for you.

Or he thinks he does.

"I want you to be sure of what you feel", you said, now with a gentler tone, "Not telling me what your temporary emotions are leading you to believe you feel."

With slow steps you moved toward him, grabbing his face in your hands and pressing your lips against his cheek. He closed his eyes at the feeling, instinctively leaning towards the warmth radiating from your touch. He almost groaned when you let go, wishing it did last further.

He watched you walk back to your house, his own heart a mess. He knew he was feeling something for you, but perhaps it was not the right time now.

He still had to deal with the lingering crush he had on his teammate, which he couldn't even tell if it was there or not. He also still wanted to put all of his focus on bringing Sasuke back, something he knew you were not on the same page as him. And perhaps, he had to also accept the fact that he did miss the chance he had with you, and it was unfair for him to meddle in your new relationship.

There was no doubt that fate was about to bring you together someday, he had a feeling about it.

But now, it was just not the right time.

cc artwork: Raja Nanadepu

#naruto x reader #naruto uzumaki #naruto imagine #naruto uzumaki x reader #naruto angst #naruto requests

[lucienarcheron]

Boner for You [Elorcan]

Prompt: Fake Dating College AU where Lorcan just wants Elide to be his girlfriend for a party and Elide wants to pretend she isn’t thrilled about it. |

Genre: Fluff/Humor Rating: SFW despite the title lol. Recommended listen: Born by OneRepublic Author’s note: Inspired by this gifset here. I saw it and it screamed Elorcan. I just had to find a way to fit it in and what better way than fake dating?

She stood scowling, rooted in her spot.

If it was up to her, she would stay rooted to this spot forever rather than step into that frat party and have to embarrass herself for him.

Elide’s eyes shifted up to glare at Lorcan who was glancing down at her with a smirk.

“Scared?”

“No.” she scoffed. “More annoyed with myself for letting you put me in this position.”

He grinned at her and brought an arm around her shoulder, pulling her closely into him. “Now now, you agreed on your own. All I did was ask.”

“Desperately.” Elide gritted out and his grin widened.  “You asked very desperately.”

“And then you agreed to come to this party with me.” He said, leaning down to meet her gaze. His smile was wicked and Elide wanted to reach up and choke him. “You agreed to come with me to the party and be my girlfriend so that my ex would leave me alone.”

“Pretend. I am pretending to be your girlfriend.” Elide emphasized then pointed at him with narrowed eyes. “And what if your crazy ex-girlfriend decides to turn her crazy on me, hm? What happens then?”

“Don’t worry. I’ll protect you, kitten.” he replied, his voice low and he playfully tried to bite her finger which she retracted immediately with a growl.

“I’m not your kitten. Don’t call me that.”

“I didn’t say my kitten but I see how you like the possessiveness of the term.” he replied, grinning at her and she scowled again. “I’ll make sure to call you that in front of people so that they know what my girlfriend likes.”

“I’m going to punch you in the face if you don’t stop.”

“You can’t reach my face, kitten.”

Elide pulled away from his arm and used every bit of strength she had to yank him down by the front of his shirt until they were inches apart.

“Yes, I can.” she replied, glaring. “Don’t push your damn luck, Salvaterre.”

“Feisty. I’m hella turned on right now.” he said, grinning obnoxiously and Elide nearly did punched him right then and there.

“Lorcan.”

“Elide.”

“I hate you.”

“Yet, you’re still here.”

Elide groaned and shot him another glare then pointedly gestured towards the door. “Let’s get this over with, you giant barbarian.”

It had been so stupid of her. So stupid.

Did she know that this would happen when she agreed to tutor his stupid ass in their Calculus course? No.

Did she think she would start crushing on this giant jock with a handsome face and really nice body while she was tutoring him? Definitely not.

Despite how annoying he was now, Lorcan was actually a good student. So when he spent the majority of their last lesson completely zoned out, she snapped at him until he confessed. He had caught her completely off guard when he asked her to go with him to a party that Fenrys was hosting. She had gotten invited alongside all her friends but hadn’t planned on going — she had even forgotten about the whole thing, until he asked.

It had taken every ounce of willpower in her not to blush and not to get too happy about it.

-Two days ago-

“Why?”

“Why what?” he had asked her confused.

“Why are you asking me?”

He shrugged. “I need someone to play my girlfriend for the party.”

“And you thought of me?”

“Yeah.” he had replied. “You’re smart and hot. Plus you're tiny and it makes me look bigger than I already am.”

Her expression flattened. “So you want me to go with you because I help inflate your ego?”

“Yup.” he smirked.

She squinted at him then said, “No.”

“Come on,” he insisted, attempting a pleading look. “I know your friends are going and it’ll be fun.”

“You think I want my friends to see me pretending to be your girlfriend?”

“They’d love it.”

“No.”

“Please?”

“No.”

“What if I told you it was because my ex was there and I really don’t want to deal with her?” he asked and Elide pursed her lips at what seemed to be a genuine expression. As if Lorcan Salvaterre couldn’t handle his ex-girlfriend.

“So you want me to play buffer between you and your ex?”

“No. When she sees you with me, she won’t approach at all.”

Elide snorted. “I doubt Maeve will be intimidated by me at all, if that’s what you’re hoping for.”

“Oh, Maeve will never see you coming. She’ll be too shocked.” Lorcan replied with a small smile.

“Shocked that you’ll stoop low enough to date a girl like me?” she asked, glowering at him.

“Shocked that a beautiful, smart girl like you would even look at a guy like me.” he corrected with a grin and Elide had wanted to punch herself for blushing.

“Well...there’s so much of you, you’re not exactly hard to miss.” she muttered, intensely gazing at her textbook. “Giant beefcake.”

Lorcan burst out laughing at that and Elide shot him a dirty look.

“If you haven’t already put that as my name on your contact list, please change it to that.” he said after it took him a few minutes to calm himself in which Elide thought of multiple ways to stab him to death with her pencil.

“I already have you down as ‘Annoying asshole’. I think it suits you better.” she huffed and he smirked at her.

“Fair enough.” he had replied, leaning closer to her. “So will you go with me? I’d be honored to have you as my pretend girlfriend.”

After a few moments of silence, she had finally agreed, on the condition that no intimate gestures would take place.

He laughed for another ten minutes at that and then Elide almost really did stab him with her pencil.

~

Currently, Elide wished she had stabbed him just to avoid stepping into this jungle.

Music was blaring, people were drunk all over the place, not to mention all over each other. Elide grimaced slightly. Lorcan’s gaze fell on her expression and he smirked before turning back to face the hallway, maneuvering them through the bodies.

“So which room do you want to start in first?”

“We will not be going into any rooms at all.” she snarled. “Open spaces only.”

Lorcan turned suddenly, causing Elide to crash into him. She staggered for a moment but Lorcan’s arm easily came around her waist, holding her tight against his chest. “Why? You’ve been in a room alone with me before, Elide.”

“That was the library. We’re never really alone in there.” she said, her arms crossed over her chest, glaring at him with flushed cheeks. “I already told you no funny business!”

Lorcan laughed and brought his face down to the crook of her neck, nuzzling his nose there before moving to her ear and speaking quietly, “Trust me, Elide. Business between us would be anything but funny.”

Her whole body heated at his words as he pulled away with another one of his wicked smiles and Elide let out a breath she hadn’t known she’d been holding.

“You giant animal.” she hissed and he snickered.

“You know kitten, you keep mentioning how much of a giant I am.” he purred. “I’m starting to think you’re hella attracted to how much of me there is. You like that I dwarf you, don’t you?”

Elide could almost feel the steam coming out of her ears as she glared at him but he only laughed and winked at her.

She wanted to run at him and pound his face in. Elide was well aware he was making fun of her and yeah she was attracted to him because he was really handsome. And tall. And beefy. She did like that he dwarfed her. In her low moments, she often wondered what it would be like to actually have his giant body on hers.

Despite how annoying he was, she had to admit, he had charmed her in one way or another. The time they spent together working on calculus was ridiculous and he infuriated her to no end. But then he also brought her a cup of coffee and a snack for every tutoring session. He pissed her off but he made her laugh too. Lorcan was nice to her, even when he was being annoying.

Sighing, she followed him. Elide would play his girlfriend. Maybe she’d enjoy it. In fact, maybe she’d be the one to surprise him. With a determined expression on her face, she followed where Lorcan was now heading towards his friends.

What Elide didn’t know was that Lorcan was giddy as hell on the inside. He had taken a risk asking her that day but he’ll be damned if he didn’t at least try with her. This wasn’t about Maeve at all. That bitch wasn’t even at the party but Lorcan was willing to use her as an excuse if only to get Elide to come with him. Tutoring had been the first excuse so he could get her number. He was crushing on this tiny girl so badly, it made Lorcan want to dig a hole and die in it. She was too good for him. Way too pure. But he saw the way she looked at him sometimes. And he saw the way she blushed at the things he said and that had given him hope. Also, it gave his imagination a lot to work with.

“Elide! You CAME!” Fenrys half screamed, already drunk. He came and threw himself on her and Elide yelped at his weight.

“Hi, Fenrys.” she choked out and Lorcan quickly yanked his giggling friend off Elide.

“Don’t crush my girlfriend. I haven’t tortured her enough yet.”

Elide shot him a glare and Fenrys let out a loud gasp.

“YOU GUYS ARE DATING?”

“Yup.” Lorcan replied, grinning obnoxiously at Elide, the glare still in his direction.

“Nope.”  She countered and Lorcan raised a brow.

“SINCE WHEN? UGH FINALLY LORCAN.” Fenrys continued, leaning against the wall for support and it was Elide’s turn to raise a brow.

“Finally?” Elide asked and Lorcan smirked.

“Don’t worry about it, kitten.”

Elide narrowed her eyes then broke out into a devilish smile. She leaned closer into Lorcan, bringing an arm around his waist. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you’ve been pining over me all this time.” she said and it was Lorcan’s turn to narrow his eyes at her. “If I didn’t know you were truly clueless at calculus, I’d think it was an excuse to spend time with me...babe.”

Lorcan blinked and prayed his body wouldn’t betray him because Elide was touching him all on her own and he felt that death was near. Her delicate hands were on his body and he felt both blessed and cursed. Fenrys giggled drunkenly.

“SHE CALLED YOU BABE. AW SHIT. YOU’RE IN DEEP LORCAN.”

“Is he now?” Elide asked, looking over at Fenrys. “Do tell.”

“Shut up, Fenrys.”  Lorcan snarled softly and Elide’s mischievous grin returned.

“Oh please, Fenrys, tell me.”

“PFFT, HE’S HAD A BONER FOR YOU FOR LIKE — MONTHS NOW.”

“Does he now?” Elide asked sweetly, lifting her eyes to meet Lorcan’s, pulling away from him and he scowled at her.

“YEAH. LIKE — HE NEVER SHUTS UP ABOUT YOU. HE ALWAYS STARES AT YOU LIKE A CREEP.”

Fenrys clearly wanted to die today. Lorcan’s scowl deepened but it was mixed with a slight panic and he bopped his friend on the side of his head causing Fenrys to yelp in return. He wanted to tell Elide he liked her. But not like this and certainly not through Fenrys.

“He’s drunk. Don’t flatter yourself and believe him.” Lorcan muttered to her, attempting the bravado he had when they first came in.

Elide blinked, her lips forming a small pout and she saw his eyes flash for a moment. “Well, geez, relax beefy.” she said quietly. “I already know you wouldn’t stoop for a girl like me. You’re the one who insisted I come with you.”

“That’s not what I meant.” he quickly amended and surprise colored Elide’s face at the red staining his cheeks. “I just — don’t listen to Fenrys — he’s being stupid —”

Elide waved a hand and cut him off, trying not to let the way her heart dropped at his words show in her expression. “Don’t worry about it. You should go get your girlfriend a drink.” she said, looking anywhere but him. “I’m going to need several if I have to keep pretending to like you.”

She could’ve swore hurt, then regret, flashed in his eyes before he reluctantly left her side to find the drinks. Elide watched him as he left and let out a sigh then her eyes scanned the room for any of her other friends.

“You know — hiccup — he really does like you.” Fenrys said, still rubbing the spot where Lorcan hit him. Elide turned to him with a raised brow.

“Does he now?”

Fenrys nodded then winced, rubbing his head again. “He just has a s-shitty way of showing it.” he slurred softly. “Maeve was a manipulative b-bitch. She totally — hiccup — fucked him up.”

Elide’s eyebrows furrowed and a small frown came on her face. Maybe Fenrys was right but that was certainly too much to hope for. Sure, he flirted with her nonstop and she had been attracted to him but Elide wasn’t really experienced and he most certainly was and —

“You’re overthinking it, t-tiny one.” Fenrys said with a drunk chuckle. “I can see it on your pretty face.”

Elide rolled her eyes but her cheeks heated nonetheless. “You’re drunk. You don’t even know what you’re saying right now.”

“Listen, I’m drunk cupid.” he said with a hiccup. “You got a b-boner for him like he has one for you. Just DO IT.”

Elide winced as he yelled the last two words, the blush deepening on her face before she waved Fenrys off. “Stop it. If he comes back just tell him I went to find the girls.”

“When you guys bone, I w-want a gift in exchange for this encouragement!” he called out after her and she flipped him off, causing him to laugh.

Elide’s eyes took in the mess of the room around her. People making out, people dancing, people laughing and drinking. She really wasn’t big on parties so she only came from time to time and each time, she was sure it would be her last.

“Well, it certainly isn’t a Fenrys party unless he’s getting flipped off by multiple people.” Aelin’s voice came from behind her and she turned with a wide grin to find her close friend.

“There you are! I was just starting to look for you and the girls!” Elide said, hugging her. “Where are they?”

“Manon and Dorian ran off doing things I don’t want to think about and Lysandra is kicking Aedion’s ass at beer pong.” Aelin replied with a laugh and Elide grinned.

“What about you and Rowan? I’m surprised you’re not all over each other at the moment.” she teased and Aelin gave her a smirk.

“We break up our intense make-outs and inappropriate touching into sessions so we don’t miss the party. You missed the first two times.” she replied with a nonchalance shrug and Elide burst out laughing.

“I’ll try to avoid any further sessions, thanks.” Elide said with an eye roll, her eyes scanning the room again, and fell on a current arm wrestling match going on between Rowan and Gavriel. Her eyes fell on the hulking figure of Lorcan intensely cheering the two on, the drink he was supposed to be getting her still in his hands.

“Forget about me...what about you?” Aelin asked and her tone made Elide meet her gaze. “Is there something you want to tell me?”

“What do you mean?”

Elide knew what she meant. Her cheeks heating on their own indicated she knew exactly what Aelin was asking and the way Aelin’s smirked at her made Elide want to run from this stupid party.

“You walking in with Lorcan? Lorcan having his hands all over you when you first came in? His face buried in your neck? You having your hands all over him moments ago? Fenrys screaming something about boners and for you two to just do it?” Aelin rattled off and Elide groaned. “I mean, Elide, when were you going to tell me you guys were boning? Everyone has been taking bets on how long it’ll take for the two of you to go for it.”

Elide’s expression turned to horror and Aelin started laughing hysterically. “I-It’s not like that!” Elide quickly explained, her face burning. “I — we — it’s not like that! I’m just pretending to be his girlfriend! I’m doing him a favor!”

“Elide, Elide, Elide.” Aelin tutted, wrapping an arm around her shoulder. “I may dislike Lorcan because he’s an annoying pig, but the heart wants what it wants. I will support you. And cut his balls off if he does anything stupid.”

Elide was about to protest again but Aelin pulled away to give her a look and she let her eyes wander back to where Lorcan was.  As if feeling her gaze, his eyes flickered to hers and Elide tried not to let his expression unnerve her. She braced herself as he started walking towards her and slowly handed her a drink.

“Sorry. I got distracted.” he said quietly and Elide took the drink, their fingers brushing as they had many times during their tutoring sessions. She curled a loose strand of hair behind her ear and gave him a thin smile.

“It’s fine. You guys look like you’re having fun.”

“Yeah.” he replied and his free hand came up to rub on the back of his neck. He shot Aelin a look before looking back at Elide and leaned closer to her. “I’m sorry. About earlier too. I didn’t mean what I said.”

She raised a brow at him. Lorcan’s expression was that of a scolded child. She almost laughed.

“It’s fine.” she repeated. “I get it. Fenrys riles up everyone.”

Lorcan chuckled then his expression turned serious again as if weighing his next words carefully. His eyes flashed to Aelin again but Aelin only crossed her arms, rooted to her spot and watched earnestly. Lorcan scowled and Elide bit back a smile then brought a hand to his chin, bringing his attention back to hers.

“What’s wrong?” she asked and Lorcan’s jaw clenched when she pulled her hand away. Elide had no idea what was going on in his mind but his eyes gave away to the hurricane which were his emotions. He cleared his throat and took a step back, taking the drink he had handed her moments ago then finished the entire cup in one go.

“I just wanted to say…” he began, then licked his lips. “Fenrys wasn’t wrong. He’s...he’s right.”

Elide blinked, looking between her empty hand and his earnest face. “W-what?”

“He’s right. I do. You know.” he said and Elide saw color heat his cheeks as he waved his hand, looking anywhere but at her. “Have a boner for you or whatever.”

Her eyebrows shot up as Aelin snorted behind her but the two ignored her.

“What I meant — I mean — that isn’t how —” Lorcan growled then stopped himself, crushing the empty plastic cup in his hand. He cleared his throat and then locked eyes with her. “I like you. I’ve liked you for a while. It doesn’t mean you have to do anything about it. I’m just — I’m being upfront with you.”

Elide stared at him. She heard the words he was saying but she wasn’t sure she could comprehend it. Lorcan watched her expression of shock and swallowed.

“So uh. You don’t have to pretend to be my girlfriend anymore. Maeve was just an excuse for me to ask you to the party.” he said and gave her an embarrassed smile. “I uh...I’m just going to go. Have fun with the girls.”

Elide blinked again and watched him go. Her body lurched forward after him but then she paused, turning to Aelin with a dumbfounded expression.

“Did he just —?”

“Yup.”

“Does he really —?”

“Yup.”

Elide’s whole body flushed and Aelin burst into giggles.

“I can’t believe he actually likes me.” she mumbled and Aelin squinted at her.

“Why wouldn’t he? You’re amazing, El.”

Elide shook her head. “I just...never thought I was his type.”

“You are very much his type.” Aelin confirmed and Elide looked at her curiously. “He’s whined to Rowan about you before when he doesn’t think I’m around. Jokes on him, Rowan tells me everything anyways.”

Elide’s cheeks flushed and she bit her lip. “So...so this is real? He isn’t...playing a game or anything?”

Aelin shook her head with a smile. “Definitely not. He knows you’re the real deal.” she said and Elide’s eyes flickered back to where Lorcan had returned to an even more intense arm wrestling match than before. He was seated in the place of Rowan, giving his opponent a menacing look as they got ready to go.

Elide watched him. She watched the curve of his body as he sat, barely putting in any effort to knock his opponent down. The corner of her lip went up when he started sniggering at the poor fellow clenching his arm and at the two who took his place. Idiots. She thought. He was a giant beast, none of them would actually be able to beat him.

“Jeez, Elide. Get a damn room.” Aelin said with a snort. Elide shot her a look.

“That’s rich coming from you.”

Aelin grinned. “Maybe. But at least I’m usually in his lap when I stare at Rowan like that.” she said then gently pushed Elide. “You should probably move along if you would like the same fate.”

“You think he’s annoying.” she said incredulously.

“Yes, he is and I would love to stab him if pulls anything.” Aelin said and then shrugged. “But he's not a total loser. What can I say? I’m a sucker for love.”

Elide blushed then bit her lip. He had been upfront with her. Maybe it was time she returned the favor.

Taking one last look at Aelin, Elide moved. She weaved her way through the bodies, her eyes locked on Lorcan and his bulging muscles that easily knocked over the two opponents across from him. She watched him laugh at his success but the laugh quickly died in his throat when Elide slid into the seat across from him.

She heard the murmur of confusion that her move had caused but her eyes were locked on the male across from her as he gazed at her with a raised brow.

Elide rested her elbow on the table and held her hand up, in position for the silly arm wrestling game he’d been playing. She gestured with her chin to his arm and with a tilt of his head, he slowly reached out to clasp his palm in hers.

“What are you doing?”

“Did you mean what you said?” she asked quietly, her heart racing at their linked palms. She really did like how his hand completely enveloped hers.

Lorcan held her gaze and she saw the sincerity in them when he answered. “Yes.”

“You have a boner for me then?” she asked with a small smile and his lips twitched.

“I do. A big boner.” he replied, a grin spreading on his face now. “Both emotionally and physically.”

“That’s good.” she said and leaned her body across the table, planting a quick kiss on his lips. His eyes widened in surprise and Elide took that moment to bring his arm down, giving her a cheater’s win in the arm wrestling match. “Because I have a boner for you too.”

At that moment, with him gaping at her stupidly, it felt like the rest of that room had vanished. It was just the two of them and a thrill rushed through her body. Lorcan stared at her for a few seconds before his head leaned back and he barked out a loud laugh.

Cheeks burning, Elide pulled back with a grin of her own.

“You owe me a date, Salvaterre. I expect you to deliver.”

He leaned back in his chair and gave her a look that made heat flood low in her belly. Oh, how she hated him.

“I owe you several dates and I plan to deliver on every single one of them.” he replied smoothly.

“Don’t expect me to go any easier on you during our tutoring though. I’m a dedicated instructor.” she said and leaned against the table, crossing her arms over her chest. His eyes lingered there a little too long before meeting her gaze and leaning forward against the table as well.

“I wouldn’t expect anything less from my girlfriend.”

“Actual girlfriend now, huh?”

“Mm. This plays into so many of my fantasies.”

“Does it now?”

“I’ve been a very bad student, kitten.”

“I honestly cannot stand you.” she replied incredulously, but the knowing grin he gave her had her toes curling and cheeks burning again. He held his palm open to her.

“Wanna get out of here?” he asked quietly and she slipped her hand into his. She really liked how much he dwarfed her.

“I most definitely do.”

#elorcan #elide lochan #lorcan salvaterre #lorcan lochan salvatorre #elorcan fanfiction #elide x lorcan #elorcanweek2023 #tog fanfic #throne of glass fanfiction #fic: bfy #gfics #I miss them

[elionwriter]

Sherlock Holmes the Awakened: a Review

(SPOILERS AHEAD)

Sorry, sorry, sorry, but I just NEED to talk about this game! I have been a Frogwares Holmes fan since the very beginning and 'The Awakened' was always among my favourite titles. Not to mention one of the games that had scared the wits out of me. So I have to speak about the Remake now.

First and foremost, I think it needs to be reiterated that this game was made DURING THE FU****G INVASION OF UKRAINE! During such dark times, the team kept working on this. I would have supported this game even just for this reason alone.

Now, let's be honest: Frogwares never had the most marvelous graphics nor the most polished of gameplays and this entry is not an exception. I still feel the map system is a bit difficult to navigate (I may be an idiot, but I had the same issue with Chapter 1) but I really appreciated the added help the game gives you when you're recreating a scene, letting you know which passage you got wrong. Last game I found myself changing everything trying to hit the right combination so I really liked this fix.

This needs to be said: the game doesn't feel under any shape or form a product for a new fan. Everything from dialogues to game mechanics sort of take for granted that you've at least played 'chapter one'. Honestly? I'm ok with this, I hate having to always go through nearly identical tutorial stages for games I know inside out (like Pokémon) and I believe that most of not all people who are going to get this game ARE old fans!

I wasn't originally a big fan of the new Holmes and Watson models when the last game came out but....I dunno, they have grown on me. I find myself liking them now for, I suppose, no other reason than 'they are very expressive' and 'I've gotten used to them'. I think it's gotten to the point that these might be my favourite models of the two to date. Please ignore how fickle I am! (In honesty, just to draw a similar parallel, when Roger Craig Smith was first announced as Sonic's voice I hated it and now he's my fav Sonic v. actor)

This game has something.....compared to its predecessor, that makes it less scary. I can't really put my finger on it, but I distinctly remember the feeling of claustrophobia building in me when I was in the Black Edelweiss. Or the sheer jumpscare I got when the sacrificed American detective on the altar had tentacles coming out of it and severing his head making it roll to the ground. I remember almost not wanting to paddle the rowboat under the tree of hanging men in the Bayou. I remember how viscerally sick I felt at the lighthouse by all the gore and blood depicted. This time round.....I just didn't. I'm honestly not sure why this didn't hit me nearly as hard as its 2006 predecessor did!

And talking about comparisons, one thing I'm a bit disappointed they didn't grab the chance to do in this remake was fix the loose ends that were left hanging in the 2006 version. I mean....they still abandoned completely the search for that one Maori servant, what happened to all the people they managed to rescue? Who hired the private American detective that was killed? Why give out the cheap pendants? I know I'm a bit dumb and need extra explaining than what is necessarily needed but...I can't be the only one right? Sometimes you want to be told just a bit more.

Now, getting into the really good bits, that make all of it worth it!

'Chapter One' acted as a 'de facto' reboot of the Frogwares Holmes series, and I honestly think that was for the best. I don't really see where they could have gone with things after 'Devil's Daughter' and their Holmes had changed too much to be the same guy from 'The Silver Earring'...let alone Watson. But like this? They have a fresh, clean slate to start off from and they can rebuild the two mains' relashionship and lore from the ground up in a more strictly consequential manner. And the way they are doing it? I think it's state of the art!

The fact that they poke fun at themselves on certain points like Watson stating: "What about when you used to roll up only one of your sleeves? Did you get bored halfway through?!" I think the Devs themselves realized this was a cringe design choice and I like that they said so out loud.

The meta-conversation they wrote in towards the end, 'because yes, this HAS Happened before and the story still has the same outcome', is brilliant. I don't think I've ever seen another remake that acknowledges that it is a remake, and in the general madness that is mounting in the narrative this makes perfect sense! It adds one more layer of horror and inexplicable to the tale. The villain's warning 'that the Final Problem is coming and Sherlock will fall in the abyss too' is such a powerful way to use Canon. The prophecy is only made more real and dreadful by the fact that this person is aware of what has already happen in a similar but different scenario!

Also, not them using that one quote from 'The Valley of Fear' novel which happens to be one of my all time favourites!

I say, Watson,’ he whispered, ‘would you be afraid to sleep in the same room as a lunatic, a man with softening of the brain, an idiot whose mind has lost its grip?’ ‘Not in the least,’ I answered in astonishment. 'Ah, that’s lucky,’ he said, and not another word would he utter.

I think the thing that has most benefited from the Remake is Watson's character. Compared to the 2006 version, this Watson is a truly compelling character in his own right and this time round he's not just along for the ride. In this version, you simply cannot imagine how Holmes would have done it on his own. Watson was in every way a key component to the solution of the problem and the reason why Holmes didn't drown in madness. That point is driven home by Rochester asking 'How did you defeat me?' and Holmes answering 'I made a friend!'

Much of the narrative in the game was focused on Holmes truly learning to accept Watson's friendship and him as a person when he was still clinging so much to his old imaginary friend. You can see how, at first, Holmes refuses to be honest with the Doctor about what he thinks and feels and it's only as they move forward in the adventure that they both open up to each other. You can see as the adventure progresses that Holmes shifts his desperate cries from 'Jon' to 'Watson' to 'John' and the Doctor goes more and more often from 'Holmes' to 'Sherlock'. Mycroft also points this out when he says that Sherlock 'went from one Jon to another'. But this one, John Watson, is real and there to stay. In the context of a story that happens mostly in the detective's mind, Watson's friendship is really what turns the situation around!

I could add of little tid bits which were so random and on the nose that somehow worked, like the possessed 'Heidi' doll or the fact that you had to actually 'Kill Holmes' with the booby traps instead of avoiding them.

Also, "The director Guygax was randomly killed.....by a doll?!????!?!?! Yeah, let's just walk out of here no questions asked. That's too deep a wormhole even for this f***d up Adventure to go down. I'm sure nobody is gonna ask us questions, suspect or stop us as we go out the main doors!" 😃 -Holmes, probably.

So, yeah, I loved this game despite it not being perfect and my love and support goes to Frogwares more that ever!

#sherlock Holmes the awakened #sherlock holmes chapter one #sherlock holmes #john watson #frogwares holmes #sherlock holmes devil's daughter #holmes x watson #sherlock x john #sherlock and jon #jon #mycroft holmes #chtulhu #eldrich horror #lovecrafian

[zippiestdraws]

Choking Curiosity Ch19

Michael Myers x ftm reader

read on ao3

“Hey!”, your face burns with embarrassment and anger.

Michael doesn’t react at first, lazily turning his head towards you before removing his hands. It occurs to you that Michael probably heard you come in, but getting spotted was low on his priorities list.

“Seriously? Michael get out of my room.” You’re too tired and too annoyed to deal with this right now.

You get a blank stare in response. With exaggerated steps, you walk past him and close the drawer he was in while he watches.

“I knew it was you- I haven’t been able to find my dick for two days and it's not funny anymore.”

Michael offers an aggravating head tilt.

“Where did you hide it? Is it in your room like my shirt was? Because if you’re not going to go get it, I’ll go look for it myself.” You punctuate your sentence by turning on your heel and starting towards his room.

You get three steps past the bathroom door in the middle of the hallway before you’re jerked back by the neck of your shirt. A choked noise escapes your throat as you collide backwards into Michael’s chest. Trying to step away proves futile as he holds you there with an iron grip on your clothes.

“Oh, so you can go in my room and root through my shit, but I can’t go in yours? C’mon let- go-” you fume, struggling against him.

When he does let you go, you stumble a few steps and you swear you hear him snort behind his mask.

“Why are you acting like this.” you ask, though said more like a statement. You think it catches him off guard because his eyes meet yours and then flit away.

You press harder, but hold a casual pose leaning against the wall. “I know you don’t like to think about your feelings, but why did you suddenly change? What are we-or I guess what am I to you?” you don’t force eye contact.

An awkward moment passes and you’re sure you’ve fucked this up when Michael gives a shrug. He’s given you something and so you keep going.

“You took your mask off for me…you can’t pretend like there’s nothing between us.” you say gently.

You give him a minute, and then it feels like five and you sigh, ready to push yourself off the wall and walk away.

“Alright. If that’s how you want it to be.”

It’s then that Michael moves, almost shyly, pulling the mask off.

You can’t help your staring, he’s just too beautiful and you’re too taken with him. His hair has gotten soft and feathery with living with you and his eyes brighter. His head is set at a sheepish tilt and when his deep blue eyes meet yours, his usual neutral expression seems almost guilty.

This in itself feels extremely lucky, but when Michael signs, you feel like you could sing. It’s slow and stuttering and your eyebrows raise as you follow his words.

You changed him into something- something different. It scares him. Both of you stand in silence: him having finished his piece, you at a loss for words.

This is more of an understanding silence than an awkward one, which you break this time. “Is that why you attacked me that day?” Your voice is nearly a whisper.

To your surprise, Michael straightens up- his set in a blank pout again, but the slightest amount of pink dusting his cheeks and ears.

‘It’s hot when you get scared’, he signs without looking you in the eye.

*** It’s four days until Halloween and you’ve finally set up that stupid ski mask scarecrow that’s been getting covered by leaves in your backyard. It stares at you lopsidedly as you go check the mailbox.

You don’t get letters, but the junkmail piles up and sometimes there’s coupons. Today there is a single blank envelope.

Turning it over, puzzled, you find no return address or name other than that it is addressed to you. Sharing a look with the scarecrow, you bring it inside and toss it on the kitchen counter.

You run over the list of people in your mind of who it could be from. Laurie, Quentin, and Jed are the only people who really know your address and could possibly want to send you something. Michael is off the table because he would just leave it lying around the house or throw it at you or something.

After taking a bite from a granola bar, you grab at it again and tear it open from the side, not bothering with the glued down flap. The first thing you pull out is a simple sheet of lined paper, folded to fit in the envelope.

Unfolding it reveals a short letter in a loopy scrawl that almost looks romantic.

Hello (Y/N), I’ve been watching you for some time now and, my, aren’t you an interesting subject. You have something that I want and soon I am going to come for it. Consider it in your best interest to cooperate, or else word might get out about the company you keep in your home or call your manhood into question. Oh, and I will kill you, so keep this behind your lips or I’ll have to sew them shut. I’ll know if you tell Michael. Happy Halloween~

Your mouth sours and it feels like that granola bar is going to come back up. What is this? In shock, you’ve been holding your breath; once you breathe out, it comes back too shallowly.

This can’t be real. But it has to be, how else would someone know about Michael? Wait- what is it that this person could possibly want from you? You’re living paycheck to paycheck in a rotting house.

You try to swallow, but can’t. Your eyes unfocus as you shakily fold up the letter multiple times and stuff it in your pocket. You’ll have to keep it somewhere hidden- under your mattress?

Picking up the envelope to throw the accursed thing away, you feel something else more substantial between the paper. You tilt and jostle it and a square of thick, glossy paper slides out.

A photo of you sleeping.

#michael myers #slashers #michael myers x reader #slasher x reader #trans writers #male reader

[storiesforallfandoms]

need help ~ nikki sixx;the dirt

word count: 1789

request?: yes!

“The dirt Nikki sixx x female reader, the reader been best friends with Nikki sense they were kids and became friends through them having terrible home lives, when motley Crüe started up she was their cheering him on. The reader also been in love with Nikki for a long time but when Nikki starts taking heroin she ends up finding him and taking care of him and this happens more than once but after he overdoses the reader snaps and says that she can’t keep watching the man she loves doing heroin. Please and thank you”

description: after finding her friend overdosing, they have a heavy talk about his addiction and his desire to get help

pairing: nikki sixx x female!reader

warnings: swearing, mentions of drugs, mentions of overdosing, lil angst?

masterlist (one, two)

It wasn’t the first time I had found Nikki in the midst of one of his highs. In fact, it was becoming such a regular occurrence that I usually expected Nikki to be high as a kite whenever I went to see him.

What I didn’t expect this time around was to find him almost dead. Or...I guess completely dead.

I had gotten a call from one of his junkie friends - also nothing new. He sounded frantic and scared as he tried to tell me there was something wrong with Nikki. I thought at first that maybe he was just too high and was freaking out because Nikki was also high, so I wasn’t too alarmed at first. I drove to the address that the guy had given me, convinced that I was going to have to carry Nikki back home yet again and nurse him through his heroin hangover.

When I showed up to the house and found it completely abandoned, a feeling of dread started to grow in me. I walked into the house to find Nikki on his own, passed out, with ghostly pale skin and dried vomit on his mouth and chest. My heart stopped as I fell next to Nikki and checked his pulse. When I couldn’t find one, I immediately called 911.

The ride to the hospital was mostly a blur. The paramedics let me ride with Nikki, but I was basically curled up in an anxiety filled ball as I watched them trying to operate on Nikki. Just when I had lost all hope of him being helped, one of the paramedics injected him with something and he gasped back to life.

Nikki was put in a hospital room to make sure the drugs fully left his system before he was discharged. They allowed me to stay with him since he had no other immediate family to call. I slept in the chair by his bedside while he went through his detox, which was probably the most uncomfortable I had ever been. But I didn’t want to leave until I knew Nikki was okay. I wanted him to wake up so I could tell him that I couldn’t keep doing this.

I was eating a bland hospital food meal when Nikki woke up. I watched him slowly come to life before taking in his surroundings. He turned his head and focused his attention on me.

“(Y/N)? Where am I?” he asked.

“The hospital,” I responded. “Do you remember much about last night?”

He shook his head. “I don’t remember anything.”

“You...um...well, you overdosed, Nik. Your heart stopped and everything. One of the paramedics managed to re-start it in the ambulance.”

“Oh.” I couldn’t read his facial expression, but I assumed he was shocked by this news. Or at least I hoped he was.

I sat at the edge of my chair, looking down at my hands. I couldn’t look at him. The words bubbling in my throat were hard to get out.”

“Nik, I can’t do this anymore.”

“What do you mean?”

I started picking at my hands. My vision was becoming blurry, but I refused to let Nikki see. I had to remain strong so I didn’t back down from this decision.

“I can’t keep watching you nearly kill yourself with drugs. I can’t keep finding you high out of your mind and having to take care of you until you’re well enough to shoot up again.”

“What are you saying, (Y/N)?”

I took a deep breath and forced out, “I can’t be friends with you while you’re like this, Nikki. I can’t keep doing this to myself.”

Silence filled the room. I was picking at a hangnail on my thumb until I accidentally made it bleed. I stuck my thumb in my mouth to try and combat the bleeding, which resulted in me finally looking up at Nikki. He was looking at me with sad eyes. I was a little caught off guard by the reaction and felt guilt building inside of me.

“You...you don’t want to be friends anymore?” he asked. “(Y/N), we’ve been friends since we were in diapers. You really want to end all that?”

I nodded. “I have to, Nikki. I can’t do this anymore. This isn’t good for me, and I can’t come to your rescue and worry that I’m going to find you dead permanently.”

“That’s not gonna happen.”

“I didn’t think so either, until I walked into a crack house to find you unresponsive and alone.”

“That’s because those idiots left me. That won’t happen again.”

I shook my head. My guilt was quickly being replaced with anger. He wasn’t understanding what I was saying. He wasn’t understanding the severity of the situation I had found him in the night before. He wasn’t going to get clean, he was just thinking about when he could get his next high.

I had to get out of there. I was no longer worried that I would go back on my decision, but rather I was worried of what I might say while angry. I got up from my chair, my body aching from being there for so long, and collected my things to leave.

“So this is it?” Nikki questioned as I headed for the door. “A lifetime of friendship and you’re throwing it away while I’m recovering from a near death experience?”

“Don’t give me that shit, Nikki!” I snapped. “It wouldn’t have been a near experience if it weren’t for me! In fact, there has probably been a number of times I’ve saved your ass. And do I get so much as a ‘thank you, (Y/N)’, ‘I appreciate you, (Y/N)’, ‘I’ll stop taking drugs and nearly killing myself, (Y/N)’?”

“I never asked you to do any of that.”

“No, you didn’t, but I still did. Because I love you. And I can’t watch the man I love killing himself anymore!”

The silence that hung between us was thicker now. I felt a wetness on my cheek as I realized I had finally let the tears start falling. This was exactly what I hadn’t wanted to say, but now it was out there and I couldn’t take it back.

I quickly threw myself out of Nikki’s hospital room. I made a beeline for the elevator, trying to put as much distance between me and that room as I could.

At least admitting my feelings made it easier for him to let me go, I thought to myself.

The sudden sound of hospital machines beeping followed by voices yelling drew my attention back to Nikki’s room. The brunette rock star was trying to shove past the number of hospital staff that was trying to coax him back into his room.

“Sir, you’re still detoxing, you have to go back to your room until the doctor discharges you,” a nurse was saying as she tried to push Nikki back into his room.

“I’ll go back in if she comes with me,” Nikki said, pointing towards me.

I felt my face heat up with embarrassment as the staff looked at me. “Nikki, you have to finish your treatment. Go back in and I’ll come see you when you’re better.”

“I don’t believe you,” he said. “I think if you walk out now that I’ll never see you again, and you can’t leave me after what you just told me.”

It felt like my throat was closing over from trying to hold back the fresh tears welling in my eyes. I managed to choke out, “I can’t.”

Nikki finally managed to break away from the staff trying to restrain him and rushed over to me. Before I could realize what he was doing, his hands were grabbing my face and his lips were on mine. It was far from being the picture perfect kiss you see in romantic comedies. It was rough and almost felt desperate. But it was a kiss, and I couldn’t help but get lost in it because it was something I had been dreaming of for years.

It was broken up when two hospital guards appeared and grabbed Nikki, forcing him away from me and back to his room. He tried to fight against them, but when he saw that I was following them now he stopped and allowed them to put him back in his bed and hook him back up to the machines he had been attached to.

I sat back down in the uncomfortable chair and we were right back to where we had been moments before, as if the last ten minutes hadn’t happened at all.

“So,” I started, “was that...real?”

He gave me a funny look. “How could it not be real?”

“I don’t know, it could’ve just been a tactic to get me to come back into the room.”

Nikki chuckled a little. “You don’t think there’s even the smallest possibility that I did that because I also have feelings for you and I didn’t want you to walk away without me telling you that?”

I shrugged my shoulder, which caused him to laugh again. “You’re so cute.”

It was hard not to smile when he said that, but I quickly wiped the smile from my face. “I still mean what I said, though. This admitting that we have feelings for one another isn’t going to change my mind. If anything, I’m much more firm on my decision that I’m not going to sit around and watch you kill yourself.”

Nikki sighed and nodded his head. “I know. I have a problem, (Y/N). I didn’t want to admit it, but I always knew that I did. I crashed Tommy’s wedding because I was high, I’ve ruined friendships, I almost died. I almost lost you. It’s just not worth it anymore. I can’t keep living like this.”

I moved closer to his bed and took his hand in mine. When his eyes met with mine I felt like my breath was taken away. He was always so handsome, even now when he was being his most vulnerable with me. Especially now that he was being his most vulnerable with me.

“We’ll get you help, Nik,” I told him. “There’s plenty of good rehab facilities you can go to, or you can try and do it on your own without the help of professionals. Either way, I’m going to be by your side every step of your recovery.”

“And when I’m clean, I’m going to do what I should’ve done a very long time ago and I’m going to take you out on a proper date.”

I smiled again at him and said, “It sounds like a deal.”

#nikki sixx #nikki sixx imagine #nikki sixx x reader #Douglas Booth #douglas booth imagine #douglas booth x reader #the dirt #Motley Crue #motley crue imagine #netflix #imagine #one shot #request #fanfiction #fanfic #fandom

[arctrooper69]

My birthday is on March 9th I don't know if you do Twins Hunter X female reader like one twin is bad the other is good they both like her but she has to pick one.

Happy Birthday! I apologize for posting this a day late, it kind of ran away on me and what was supposed to be a short drabble ended up becoming six full pages long. Hope you had a great birthday!

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Fire and Ice

The icy caves of Illum hold insight to many secrets. Will your feelings for Hunter help you or hinder you on your journey?

Warnings: Dissociation. Mental struggles. Hypothermia and all the fun stuff that goes along with it 😂

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"I just don't understand! Why now?" Hunter frustratedly threw his hands up. You shook your head and took a deep breath, trying not to be angry at his unexpected outburst.

It had been two years since life as you knew it had suddenly been flipped upside down. Two years since your master had sacrificed himself to save you. One year since your best friend was killed by the Second Sister. A year since you'd cut yourself off from the Force, and a year since you'd sold your lightsaber and joined this ragtag band of rouge clones - your new found family.

"I just..." You looked at your feet, struggling to find the words to speak to the man who'd become your closest friend. Your confidant. Your unrequited love.

You sighed, biting your lip. "Seeing Tippoca City destroyed, seeing everything the Empire has done and is still doing.... I feel like I should've done more."

"Cyar'ika," Hunter breathed, sitting down beside you. He put a hand on your shoulder. "You know none of that was your fault."

You sniffed, wiping tears that threatened to fall. "I know it's not, Hunter. But what if Echo is right?" You looked back up at him. You didn't need the Force to read the conflicted look on his face. "Maybe we should be doing more. We could be helping a lot more people!"

Hunter furrowed his brow. "We are helping people. We're keeping Omega safe. We're doing what we can!"

"Yeah, but I'm not!" you huffed.

"What do you mean?" Hunter turned to face you with a confused expression.

"Hunter, I am -" you paused, "I was a Jedi. I should be doing more."

He cocked his head. "I thought you said you cut yourself off from that. You sold your lightsaber."

You nodded. "I did. I was scared, Hunter. I was a scared kid who wanted to be done with fighting wars. I hid my identity. I hid who I was because I was terrified that an inquisitor would find me like they did my friend. People got hurt because of me."

"So what changed?"

You shrugged. "I just...after seeing all this evil being done under the guise of peace, I feel guilty. It was selfish to cut myself off from something that can help fight that evil."

Hunter shifted, "But it's also dangerous. You cut yourself off to keep the Empire at bay and now you want to just jump back into the fight!? What about Omega? What about her safety? What about us?"

Us? Your heart skipped a beat, but then a more reasonable thought smothered it. He was probably referring to the team. Not me and him.

"If that's really how you feel, then I'll leave with Echo and Rex when I return." You said bitterly.

Hunter tensed. "I -" his shoulders sank in defeat. He couldn't say what he wanted to say. Not when you'd already made up your mind. Maybe he was being the selfish one. "When are you leaving?"

"Tomorrow."

"Where? Where will you go to do this? To be a Jedi again?"

You sighed, suddenly feeling very heavy. Did you really want to leave him on these terms? You didn't have a choice.

"I'll need to meditate. And I'll need to rebuild my lightsaber. I need to go to Illum. To the crystal caves."

***

It was colder than you remembered. At least it wasn't windy inside the caves. The wind had nearly blown you off the mountain as you'd waited for the crystal's amplified rays to melt the entrance of solid ice.

You were only a youngling the last time you were here. You recalled the excitement flooding your veins. But that was years ago - you were young then. Back then, that youngling had friends, she wasn't alone. She was naive - ignorant of the horrors of the war to come. Now you were flooded with an air of uncertainty.

Though cut off from the Force, you'd felt different upon entering the caves. Something in the air felt conflicted - stretched and pulled in so many different directions.

***

"Uhgggg!" You shouted in frustration. You'd been wandering around for what felt like hours.

"What am I even doing here!?" You shouted out loud. Your voice echoed eerily through the icy passageways. You sunk to the floor in defeat.

"You were right, Hunter." you mumbled. You couldn't remember what you did as a youngling all those years ago.

Meditate. Your master's voice rang in your mind. You recalled the hours he spent teaching you and scolding you when you'd begin to drift off to sleep. It had been a long time since you truly meditated. You closed your eyes.

I am one with the Force and the Force is with me. I am one with the Force and the Force is with me.

***

It seemed like hours had passed when you opened your eyes. You sighed. Nothing was any clearer. No epiphanies, no sudden emotion, no direction.

A figure appeared suddenly in the distance. A man stood straight at attention. His brown eyes were sharp and hair was long, swept back in a red bandana. Hunter.

What was he doing here? Relief flooded your veins - a welcome distraction from the dangerous chill in the air. So he decided to follow you after all. Despite the heated argument before, he hadn’t left you on your own.

“Hunter!” you called out. He didn't answer but turned on his heel heading down the icy corridor away from you.

"Hunter?" You pulled yourself to your feet, wrapping your coat tighter around you and ran after him. He didn't stop to see if you were following. It was almost like he was certain that you would.

The corridor emptied into a small, natural cave. Frozen stalagmites glistened, sending fractals of light dancing from an unknown source of light. You looked around and realized that you were alone once again.

"H-Hunter?" You shivered. No response. Had you imagined him?! It was common knowledge that the caves could show you visions. Even the younglings knew that. But why would the Force choose for you to see Hunter?

You blinked and suddenly jumped in surprise. Hunter stood before you once again but this time he held out his hand towards you, palm up as if offering something to you.

It glittered in the light - almost as if it were glowing of its own accord. A kyber crystal. Was it yours? It couldn't be. This was too easy. On the other hand, it almost felt romantic, the way he held it out to you. Alluring. You reached your hand out to take it but before you could, he vanished in a cloud of fog. Snatching your hand back as though it had been burned, you stood there in confusion. What was happening!?

Two figures emerged from the fog and you took a step back in surprise. One was Hunter and the other was also Hunter.

Each clone had a crystal in his hand, holding it out to you.

One Hunter was more prominent than the other. He stood tall and at attention. His brown eyes looked at you with pride and...something else you couldn't quite place. He smelt of pine and blaster grease. He was warm, and very attractive.

The other was fainter than the first. He still stood strong but his face was kind and sad - almost pitying. But nevertheless, he felt like home. You wanted to curl up next to him. He was cool, calm, and collected - but still he held an air of authority. That attitude was what you loved about him.

"You have to choose, cyare." The first one spoke.

How could you choose!?

Both figures had Hunter's looks and his deep, husky voice, but there was still something else there that you couldn't explain. Something different between the two of them.

Tapping into the Force did nothing but make you dizzy as if a tornado was tossing you this way and that, like you were wandering around in circles. Light and dark. Peace and Passion. Chaos and Order.

"Don't make this decision lightly, Mesh'la." Warned the fainter one on the left. "You have to choose one of us."

You took a step backwards, head reeling. Choose? How? Both were Hunter. Both were the man you'd fallen in love with.

"We'll be together, Mesh'la." The darker Hunter spoke. "Forget these inscessant politics. Screw the Empire. Screw the Rebellion. It's us against the galaxy. Just us. You, my brothers, and me. That's all that matters."

The lighter Hunter emerged again, holding the crystal in his palm.

"Apathy is just as dangerous as ignorance." He said. "You know this and that's why you have to go. You have to leave."

"No!" Growled the other one. "You can't leave me! How can I protect you if you're gone? You're mine, cyare. I care for you too much to let you go. Choose me, cyare. I'll go with you."

"Everything in moderation, Mesh'la. Be careful. I trust you, and even though I don't like it, I know that our paths are different. Our battles are different. You have always been meant for greater things. Trust me, Mesh'la. Choose me."

You looked back and forth between them. The darker one gazed at you with a lust in his eyes that made you weak. It made you hungry. This Hunter was feral and dangerous. This Hunter excited you. He wanted to join you. Together you'd be nearly unstoppable. The rush he gave you told you that the two of you could take down the Empire. You could save everyone. You could fix everything.

"Save everyone, but at what cost?" The lighter Hunter spoke sharply. There was that tone of voice you knew so well. The voice of a leader. Powerful but kind. He did what was in the best interest of his squad. His family.

"Didn't you say that you wanted to make a difference, cyare? You came here for a reason. Remember that."

You came here for a reason.

Save everyone.

Stop the Empire.

Yes. This must be the right one. The darker one made sense. This must be the right Hunter to choose. Your Hunter.

"You and me against the galaxy," You whispered, stretching out your hand to grasp the crystal he offered.

The ground shuttered and the lights extinguished.

Wrong wrong wrong.

Every sense stood on edge as the sharp warning in the Force came too late. Too sudden. Instead of Hunter's warm grip, your fingers closed on nothing but the frigid air.

The ice beneath your feet cracked and crumbled, knocking you to your knees. Pain shot up your leg, drawing a sharp gasp.

“Hunter!” A shrill scream of terror echoed through the crevasse as you fell into the dark abyss.

***

The painful, stinging smack of flesh hitting water jolted you out of a daze for a fraction of a second before your senses exploded. A violent, stabbing, cutting cold thrust itself around you - through you - stealing the air from your lungs. In a panic, you opened you mouth to scream but the icy torrent forced itself inside sending paradoxical sensations of both blessed numbness and excruciating agony to your mind. Like a datapad overloaded with too much information, you couldn't think. You couldn't breathe. You couldn't feel beyond the brutal cold.

You were vaguely aware of the sudden stop, sliding down out of the water into a small cave of ice and rock.

Coughing and sputtering, you placed your hand against the ice, forcing you to sit up but your arms shook too badly and you collapsed, teeth chattering so hard you thought they might break.

Lying there on the ice, you tried to make sense of your situation. The Force heavily surrounded this place but whether it was light or dark, you couldn't tell. You couldn't discern anything right now.

Maybe Hunter was right. I'm not ready for this. I can't do this. I'm going to die here.

"H-Hunter...." you whimpered, words barely slipping past numb lips. Cold. Maker, it was so cold. The alarm bells in your head were screaming. Get up! Get up! But you found that the will to do so had long since ebbed away.

Tears froze on your cheeks as you choked on the deathly cold - teeth chattering endlessly as muscles painfully contracted.

"You're a failure." The dark whispered harshly. The menacing voice echoed off the walls of the ice chamber, reminding you that you were trapped. There was no way you'd be getting out of this one. Not this time. "Weak. Pathetic." It growled. "You failed the Jedi. You failed yourself. You are unworthy and now you are going to die alone."

Curling in on yourself, you wrapped your arms around your stomach in a desperately futile attempt to stay warm.

So tired.

Hunter I'm sorry.

Your eyelids fluttered closed.

***

"Get up!" A harsh voice whispered at your ear. "Get up!"

A half breathed groan eked past your lips as you lay huddled on the ice, unmoving. The cold didn't bite as hard now. You felt listless. Slow. Gazing at only white through heavily hooded eyes. Even blinking seemed to take tremendous effort.

"Now!" The voice urged.

A thousand fleeting thoughts tumbled around in your mind - slow and mottled together as though trudging through an avalanche or wading through honey. Nothing made sense. You were just so tired.

"Fine." A different voice echoed through the cavern. It was darker than the last. "Just stay here with me then." It growled - dark, sultry, and warm. It was so warm.

You could smell him - a musky, rich, woody scent. It was Hunter's scent. His warm hand swept gently across your face, cradling your head as you leaned into his embrace.

"Hunter," you mumbled, closing your eyes as he wrapped his arms around you.

"Yes," he responded. You could almost feel the vibrations in his chest. "Just rest cyare. Close your eyes. I'll keep you warm."

His words were compelling, his voice intoxicating. More than anything, you wanted to believe him. You longed to give into his embrace, to close your eyes and sleep. He was warm. The ice was cold.

"This isn't right!" The first voice whispered from the ice. "You're not supposed to be here."

The icy whispers gave you pause, suddenly giving voice to the lingering doubt flickering in the back of your mind like a powercell on its last sparks of life.

"Get up! Move!"

An overwhelming jolt of terror flooded your chest as panic gripped the ragged edges of your mind. You shouldn't be here. This wasn't Hunter.

You turned to look at him and gasped. Red flame burned in the holes where his eyes should've been. He stared back at you longingly. Possessively.

"Stay here with me, cyare. I told you I'd keep you warm."

Oh how you longed to stay in his embrace - to drift off to sleep in his arms, but something told you that if you did that, you'd never wake up.

Stiffly you shook your head, unable to do much more. You felt frozen, out of place, paradoxical to the warmth surrounding you.

His arms held fast, gripping your body tighter and tighter against his chest.

Wrong.

Get off. Get off. Get it off!

You panicked, flailing around, though his arms locked you in place.

This was wrong. What was once warm and comforting was now becoming suffocating and hot. Too hot.

"No!"

Finding a sudden strength, you tore him off. Fingers ripping at fabric in a desperate attempt to rid yourself of the suffocating heat.

"Quickly now! Move!" The ice whispered.

You found yourself running. A hole had now formed in the wall of your icy prison. For a brief dissociative moment, you watched yourself run, body dragging itself onwards towards an outstretched hand.

Sliding around a corner you caught a glimpse of the fire behind you. Still burning, still pursuing. You stumbled, flames licking at the backs of your legs. Hot. Too hot. A frenzied panic gripped you as you fought to free yourself from it's ever burning touch.

"Keep running, cyar'ika!" The ice whispered, stronger this time. "Run!"

A figure formed ahead of you, giving voice to the whispers. He held out a hand. A second figure emerged. The same two as before.

"CHOOSE!" They both screamed. Your head pounded. You fell to your knees, wanting to curl up into a ball and give into the numbness consuming you.

Just close your eyes. It's all a dream. Sleep. Your delirious thoughts flickered traitorously through your mind.

"Choose! Choose! Choose! Choose! Choose!" The screaming voices seemed to get louder and louder, wrenching you from your lethargic stupor.

"I CAN'T!" you screamed. "I CAN'T CHOOSE. Neither of you are right. Neither of you are Hunter. I love the real Hunter."

The ice shuttered again as you sank to the floor, closing your eyes, preparing for your imminent end. You couldn't move but it didn't seem to matter anymore. You would freeze to death - even if you got it right.

Goodbye Hunter.

Suddenly the two figures merged into one. Your eyes flickered open, squinting at the blinding light. The figure held out a hand.

No. Please no more. I can't take anymore.

As though it could read your thoughts, a voice spoke from the cavern. Hunter's voice. The two had become one voice now.

"Take it, cyar'ika. You survived. You did so well. Trust me one last time."

You reached out with the last of your strength and took the hand. The ice shook with a violent finality.

Had you chosen wisely? Was this another trick?

You burst through the ice and collapsed. There was no fire. No ghostly ice vapors. Just quiet. Peaceful quiet.

You lay on your back staring up at the clouds. It was snowing. A giggle escaped from your throat, drawing a weak smile on your lips. The snow felt so good on your exposed skin.

Voices drifted down the hill. Tech. Echo. Wrecker. Hunter.

There was something heavy in your hand - the hand that had grasped onto your savior. Slowly, finger by finger, you uncurled your hand. The kyber crystal glimmered as the sun emerged from behind a cloud.

Hunter's frantic voice grew louder as the clones neared you.

A smile formed from frozen and cracked lips as your eyes slipped shut. You were safe. Hunter was here. The real one. Your Hunter. You'd passed the trial. You'd chosen the light. And Hunter would be there when you awoke.

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@zoeykallus @ttzamara @nahoney22 @merkitty49 @viva-la-whump @agenteliix @dumpsters-little-matchbook @nekotaetae @ladykatakuri @loverofclones @heyitsaloy @padawancat97 @jambolska-grozdova @flyingkangaroo @melymigo @rain-on-kamino @jiabeewrites @my-own-oracle @dragonrider9905 @queenofspades6 @ordinarylokix @jupitersaturnapollo @queencousland101 @vampirerouge @southernbaguette @staycalmandhugaclone @dalu-grantkylo

If you want to be on my taglist, feel free to send me a message! Also, asks are open! Reblogging is very much encouraged and it makes me do a happy dance every time any of my writing gets reblogged 😂❤️

#hunter #hunter x you #hunter x reader #tbb hunter #tbb hunter x reader #tbb hunter x you #hunter the bad batch #hunter the bad batch x reader #hunter the bad batch x you #sergeant hunter x you #sergeant hunter x reader #sargent hunter #the bad batch #star wars #star wars the bad batch #sw tbb #swtbb #star wars the clone wars #the clone wars #tbb x you #tbb x reader #tbb echo #tbb tech #tbb wrecker #tbb crosshair #tbb omega #clone wars #swtcw #sw tcw #clone force 99

[glitterdustcyclops]

okay it's nearly one in the morning and i can't sleep because i'm thinking too much about astarion so permit me to ramble for a moment (you actually have no choice)

but just

ugh

the more and more i play the game and experience all the different facets of the conversations you can have with him (and also ruthlessly spoil myself on his arc both ascended and not because i'm impatient lmao) the more i am just, completely in awe of the depth and care that went into writing him??

like, okay, cards on the table, i have a pretty major vampire kink, biting kink, blood kink, etc. and from the first moment i heard there was a romanceable character in a fantasy rpg that was a flirtatious queer vampire pretty boy with a Traumatic Backstory and a twisted master/slave relationship with an Evil Dude i was immediately like 👀👀👀

could not draft the marriage proposal fast enough, you know?

and larian could've just stuck with that! they could've had him be an incorrigible flirt, and have his whole arc focused on getting revenge against the horrid man what wronged him, and by helping him on his quest you earn his love and you two ride off into the sunset, happy forever

but no. instead we got something so much more, and it's entirely fascinating to me. all of his layers and contradictions!! the different masks he wears on top of each other, and all his pain and trauma barely simmering under the surface of his pretty polished façade.

and not only do we go ahead and take this man whomst on the surface appears to be a walking vampire erotica trope in a gorgeous package, but we pull off the reveal (and depending on how you play it this can happen almost immediately after you express interest in him) that this whole thing, is a very blatant, deliberate act. one cultivated by a sexual abuse survivor, as a way to protect himself from the things that scare him, that make him vulnerable.

he straight up tells you to your face that this is a lie!! this all pretend!!! you're supposed to fall for it, he wants you to. what he does not want, what he could never predict, not in centuries, is that you would see past his mask(s), and then go ahead and love him anyway. him. the real him, the one he barely knows himself, the flashes he reveals to you accidentally in small moments, as much as he doesn't want to: all those messy cruel capricious terribly horribly wonderfully real parts of himself, and how he wants to be real with you in turn, even though it scares the absolute bejeezus out of him

and THEN!!!! the further you go in his romance, the more you realize that this walking series of pickup lines, this supposed master seducer, is actually incredibly wary of sex because of all the trauma and pain it's caused him. sex is not something he associates with true joy or pleasure or even intimacy, not anymore; the ability to feel good about his body was taken from him. the game makes it explicit that, as a man who was robbed of his agency and his ability to meaningfully consent to sex, not only is it the objectively wrong decision but it is downright evil to force him into doing anything sexual with you, even though you're his True Love or whatever, and as he learns and grows and feels more secure in himself he will straight up dump your ass if you violate his boundaries around sex!!!

and instead of flirt-flirt-flirt-true-love-forever you get all these really sweet, tender moments of nonsexual intimacy, hand holding and hugs and just, honest sweet conversations? you can even tell him "hey i don't think it's good for us to be serious right now, but i still want to be your friend." and even if you do keep romancing him, you can reassure him that you don't hold his lack of interest in sex against him, you still want to be with him just as he is!! he is worth it to you, with his ten-piece designer set of luxury baggage. and he practically melts about it!!

and this is not even getting into everything post cazador quest, i haven't even gotten to those scenes yet except for the "evil" version (trying not to ruin it for myself haha) but the way his arc ends in the "good" version where you talk him out of doing the ritual, out of perpetuating the cycle of abuse that was forced on him, and instead show him a better way forward? and he experiences true actual freedom for the first time in centuries, and he hesitantly decides that he wants to keep going forward with you??

UGH!! i just, i care about astarion so much!!!! i am absolutely head-over-heels-stupid in love with him and the way he's written and i will never fucking get over it, oh my god, help me, i'm DYING

#shut up chocolate #baldur's gate 3 #astarion #spoilers #we have reached FULL BLORBO STATUS #i am UNWELL #i will NEVER be the SAME oh my GODDD #he's my perfect precious angel princess and a miserable little rat bastard of a man!! #he's petty and mean and silly and lovely and so scared but so so brave and i just #AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH #as i said in the tags of another post #we are down APOCALYPTIC #absolutely NO survivors

[indibutterfly]

One shot fic about Showtime where Caine "mildly" celebrates how he isn't the smallest/shortest member of the group anymore when Pomni arrived at The Tent!

This one was a bit tricky, but I think I got it! (Hopefully)

Hope you like it!

“Ah Crap, I can’t reach it.” Gangle said trying to fit into the small room.

“Hate to break it to ya ribbons, but I highly doubt you are going to fit in there.” Jax snarked from the outside.

“I really thought I could get it by myself.” Gangle nearly sobbed, as she exited the room.

“You might be made out of ribbons Gangle, but there is no way you are short enough to get your crayons.”

“Well you were the one who scared me and made me drop them in the first place.” Gangle pouted. Jax chuckled and patted her head.

“Don’t worry your little head Gangle, we can just ask the shortest member of the circus to get them for you!” Almost as if on cue, Caine teleported right next to Gangle and Jax.

“Did someone say my name?!”

“Uh no, neither one of us said your name, but since you’re here could you do me and Gangle a favor?” Caine pulled at the cuffs of his jacket, trying to act like he was about to do something extraordinary.

“What can I help you with Jax?!”

“Could you bring Pomni here?” Caine was confused at this request.

“Pomni? What do you need her here for?” Jax could tell Caine was getting a tad annoyed at the fact that Pomni was needed instead of him. Gangle face palmed as she practically could read what Jax had in mind.

“Just bring your jester here, would ya?” Caine raised his eyebrows (did he even have those?), nevertheless with a snap of his fingers Pomni was teleported to them. She stood there with a shocked look on her face as she tried to process what was happening.

“Pomni my dear! It seems as though Gangle and Jax are in need of your assistance! I am not quite sure what you could do for them that I can’t do, but still they insist on you!” Pomni blinked her eyes, finally catching up with everything that was happening. With a shake of her head, she was able to process everything better.

“Uh sure? What do you guys need?” Jax grinned and pointed towards the small hole-like room.

“Gangle here needs you to grab her crayons that mysteriously disappeared down there.” Pomni nodded and hopped into the tiny room with ease. She quickly was able to retrieve the crayons without any issues.

“That’s what you needed her for! Why couldn’t you have asked me to help you? I could’ve just gotten it for you I am the shortest member of the circus after all!” Caine asked with a shocked tone of voice.

“Well you see Caine you aren’t. Well at least not anymore. Pomni here is now the shortest member of the circus, and is way better at fitting into small places.” Caine floated dumbfounded at this new information. Pomni was…..short. The silence was awkward but short lived.

“I am going to get back to my drawings, thank you Pomni for your help.” Gangle said before walking away to another room.

“It’s my job to bother her, and I am on the clock. See ya!” Jax ran off quickly in the direction of Gangle. The ringmaster just floated in silence, causing his jester to be quite uncomfortable.

“Uh Caine?” She tapped the end of his heel, causing him to quickly snap out of whatever trance he was in.

“Pomni my dear! I just had the greatest revelation!” He said as he picked her up and twirled her around.

“Oh really? What is it?”

“You are short!” Pomni looked at him with a weirded out expression.

“Don’t you see my dear! I have always been the shortest member of the circus! However, you have beaten me in terms of short height!” Pomni nodded her head slowly.

“I don’t see why that’s a thing you are excited about, but uh yeah I am short.”

Caine gave her a giant squeeze before putting her down on the ground.

“I’ve got to go my star! There are so many things I have got to do at this moment!” Pomni felt some unease. Normally when her partner says that it usually ends in her having to do something unorthodox, but at the moment she didn’t really care. A few hours later though, Caine teleported her to his location with what appeared to be a huge smile on his face.

“My dear, would you be so kind as to assist me with something?” He said in a way too excited tone.

“What is it Caine?”

“Well I seemed to have dropped my staff and it rolled under that chair. I am afraid I am unable to retrieve it due to my height. Would you be a dear and help me get my staff?” Pomni rolled her eyes. She would do it of course, but now that Caine has found something new and “exciting” for him he is going to make sure that he continues to do it until the rest of the cast (or in this case Pomni) yelled at him. She was right. He had a numerous amount of “jobs” and “ways she can help”. After a while of this taking place, she decided to talk to the ringmaster.

“Uh Caine, can we chat for a second?” Caine floated towards his lover.

“Why of course my love! What exactly would you care to discuss?”

Pomni took a deep breath.

“Why exactly are you giving me jobs fit for a short person? I get that I am short, but it’s starting to get really annoying.” Caine took off his hat and gave a soft expression towards Pomni.

“That certainly was not my intention, I simply thought it was really interesting having someone be shorter than me. I had no intention of being considered annoying my dear! I was more excited and curious! I hope you can look past this error.” That actually made a lot of sense to Pomni. Being an AI who’s seen everyone else be greater in size, seeing someone of a different height is interesting. She gave a slight chuckle and patted him on the shoulder.

“It’s fine Caine. As long as you promise to not make me do any “short tasks” again.” Caine placed his hat back on his head and scooped her up into his arms.

“I make no promises on that my dear! I think your height is rather adorable! I am going to show everyone that only my cute jester has the ability that no one else possesses here!” Pomni gave a small laugh.

“Are we just going to ignore the fact that you can magically teleport things and change the sizes of spaces?”

Caine laughed along with Pomni.

“For this instance, I suppose we shall my love!”

Fin~

(I am still doing ship one-shots. If you have an idea send me an ask or comment and I will do it. As long as you follow the guidelines.)

#the amazing digital circus #tadc caine #caine tadc #tadc pomni #caine x pomni #pomni tadc #showtime ship #tadc jax #tadc gangle #pomni x caine #tadc fanfiction #fanfic

[666writingcafe]

A Trip To The Past

Upon grabbing Not-Solomon's hand, my vision goes momentarily black, but then I find myself in a brightly lit meadow with lots of colorful flora. This has to be somewhere in the Celestial Realm; everything's overly saturated.

The last time I was in the past, I was with Barbatos, observing the memory of Lilith's death. We had to hide in the shadows to make sure we weren't spotted, or we'd permanently alter the memory.

You don't have to do that this time.

Great. Not-Solomon's in my head. I am tired of people walking in and out of it like it's their own place, because it's not.

Reach up towards the top of your head.

Confused, I do as he instructs, and something burns my hand.

Except when I pull it back to see how much damage I've done to it, there's no mark. Which means I've assumed the form of something that's resistant to this kind of bodily damage. And given that I'm in the Celestial Realm...

"Why, hello there." A voice pierces through my thoughts, forcing me to focus on the person standing before me. A rather familiar looking person.

"I don't think I've ever seen you around before," Asmo continues. "What's your name?"

You can use your real name.

"MC," I answer. Asmo smiles.

"That's a good name. It suits you. I'm Asmodeus, but you probably already knew that. Everyone here does." He pauses. "You don't work for Raphael, do you?" I shake my head.

"I just arrived here," I tell him. "I got separated from my group, and I have no idea how to find my way back."

Good. New angels go through an orientation-like process.

I had no idea that was a thing. I just figured I'd play up the sad, pathetic, and clueless schtick. It's worked to my advantage before.

"Great!" Asmo quickly adds,

"Not the bit about you being lost. That sucks. I'm just glad that you don't work for Raphael."

"Why?"

"Well, you see, I went to something called a party in the human world the other day. I'd never been to one before, and I wanted to see what it was all about. It was a costume party, and so I simply pretended I was a human dressing up as an angel. That way I didn't have to hide my wings."

"What did you think of the party?" Asmo's face lights up.

"It was so much fun!" Just as quickly, his expression sours. "But Raphael says it's a wicked and immoral thing to do."

"He's not entirely wrong. People tend to overindulge at parties." Asmo sighs.

"I suppose you're right. A lot was happening at that party, things that are considered taboo here." He pauses again. "Raphael found out about my little adventure and has called me in to see him, but I hate getting lectured, especially over something that's not that big of a deal. I should be able to have fun every once in a while."

Interesting. I wonder if this party served as the catalyst for Asmo to eventually become the Avatar of Lust. If he disagreed with Raphael about something small like the nature of parties at this point in the past, did he begin questioning more serious things further down the line?

"What're you doing here?" The sudden appearance of another person causes Asmo to scream, which in turn causes me to jump.

"Beel, you nearly gave me a heart attack!" he shrieks. "Don't scare me like that!"

"I don't think I was being particularly scary," Beel replies, looking slightly confused and sad. Once Asmo composes himself, he asks Beel to open up the Celestial Realm gates, and Beel simply answers,

"No." Asmo protests, but Beel's attention is no longer on him, but rather on me.

"Who's this?" he asks. Before I can even open my mouth, Asmo chirps,

"Oh, this adorable thing? That's MC. MC, this is Beelzebub, one of the cherubim. You probably know this already, since Beel's quite famous, but he guards the gates at the Celestial Realm."

"I remember my group leader mentioning him a couple times," I respond.

"Group leader?" Beel appears to grow concerned. "Did you get lost, MC?" I nod my head. "Are you okay? Asmo hasn't tried anything on you, has he? He likes to hit on anything that moves."

"I'm okay--"

"Beel, what an awful thing to say!" Asmo interrupts. "I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't go around accusing me of randomly hitting on everyone I see. It's not as if I'm happy to be intimate with just anyone, okay?! I care about who they are. I just happen to feel love towards everyone I meet, that's all." Beel doesn't seem convinced.

"You look like you're hungry," he remarks to me. "I have a few sweets Michael gave me earlier if you'd like something to eat."

"I'm okay, but thank you. Besides, if they're a gift, you should keep them for yourself." Beel sighs.

"I wish I could, but I'm trying to lay off the sweets. I've been eating too much recently, and I feel like I've gained weight as a result."

First Asmo, now Beel. Did something specific trigger Beel to start eating more than he ought to, or was it more gradual? More importantly, do these actions mean that they were somehow destined to become the Avatars of Sin, even if no one realized it at the time they occurred?

Signs. Of course. That's why Not-Solomon transported me to this particular period of time: to observe the early signs of their eventual fall. But why?

And then everything hits me at once.

If you were to spend any real time here–and not just in the areas prepared for visitors–you’ll find that it’s a rather dark place.

You're the one person I can trust fully.

I desperately want to hold your hand.

I need you, MC.

It's Simeon, isn't it? He's at the crossroads Not-Solomon was referring to. That would explain why he seemed so worn out at the cafe earlier; his mind has allowed him very little rest, and why would it? This is a potentially life-altering decision for him. Does he remain an angel, or does he fall and become something else?

The brothers made their decision a long time ago, but I have a feeling it won't be as easy for Simeon. They at least had each other. Simeon has Luke to think about, because I doubt he's going to take the young angel with him. I know that he wants Luke to maintain his innocence for as long as possible, and falling would expose him to some rather dark truths.

Which means the only way Simeon can actively protect him is to remain in the Celestial Realm. But is he willing to pay the price for it? Luke's purity, or his own happiness?

And how am I supposed to help Simeon decide which path to take?

#obey me shall we date #obey me mc #obey me asmo #obey me asmodeus #obey me beel #obey me beelzebub #obey me simeon #obey me nightbringer

[honeysuckleharringtons]

"I truly can't control my heart around you" (I think that's what it was lol) with Billy, plssss <33

hello anon that i definitely don't know irl 😉 i ~definitely~ haven't told you this already but i am so sorry it took me so long to post this. ily, thank you for being patient with me 🫶🏻

"The L Word" ~ B. Hargrove

Summary: When Y/N asks Billy why he likes her so much, his answer is a much different outcome than she'd expected.

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 1,031

Content Warning: Billy smoking cigarettes, swearing, i think that might be it?

Genre: Fluff. i mean, i guess Angst if you squint but i'd say it's mostly Fluff.

Extra Notes: hmmm, none that i can think of right now!

Based On the Prompt: "I truly can’t control my heart when I'm around you."

Originally Written: between 09/17/22 and 09/19/22

Beta Read By: @reidsbookclub 🫶🏻

honeysuckleharringtons's masterlist can be found here!

ship prompts can be found here!

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"Hey, how come you're so nice to me?"

This question had been prompted by what was probably seen as the smallest gesture in any other relationship—the simple act of Billy wrapping his jacket around my shoulders.

His right hand was laced with mine as the other held a cigarette, nearly dropping it as he registered my question. "What?" he asked, seeming genuinely confused.

"I mean, I don't know of any other girl in Hawkins you'd willingly lend your favorite denim jacket to," I further clarified.

Billy was quick to bounce back with, "Well, no other girl in Hawkins is as smokin' hot as you are, now are they, pretty girl?"

Normally, I would've blushed at his usage of a nickname, but instead, I found myself letting out a light scoff. "Seriously?" I asked, sliding myself up further onto the hood of his car.

He continued to lightly lean against it, taking in a whiff of the mixture of night air and cigarette smoke. "Yeah, seriously. Everyone else is either a blonde bimbo or just looks like straight up dog shit."

I cut my eyes at him sharply. "Not what I meant."

He slowly raised the cigarette to his lips, taking a long inhale. He slowly exhaled, the smell of smoke quickly wafting into my nose. "You're not gonna let it go, are you?"

I looked at home straight faced, shaking my head.

He let out a deep sigh, his expression slightly softening. "You know… it's like… I…" he struggled to collect his thoughts.

"You OK? I didn't break you, did I?" I giggled, reaching up to run my hand through his hair.

He grabbed my hand mid-stroke, moving it to his chest. "You feel that?"

I could feel the light thumps through the white cotton that sat tightly against his skin. "Uh huh," I answered, unsure where this was going.

"That only happens when I'm with you."

"What? Your heart beating?" I asked sarcastically. "Because if so, you should definitely go see a doctor because your heart stopping that often is definitely not supposed to happen."

This time, he cut his eyes at me. "Not what I meant, smartass."

I looked over his face as he began to collect his thoughts once more. He licked his lips as he searched for words, his eyebrows ruffling in perplexity.

Finally, he spoke up once more. "I don't know… it's like, I can't really control my heart when I'm around you," he said, taking a long pause. Eventually, he continued with, "If I have to be honest, it kinda scares me."

"Bills," I started, my expression gentle as I moved my hand back to his hair, "I think what you're feeling is a four-letter word that begins with L."

Despite being together for a few months, I was the only one who'd ever said the L word. Ever since Billy was a kid, he'd had this misperception that love was rare—that it was something you had to earn, not something that was inherent in everyone. I tried not to push the L word on Billy, but I believed I'd loved him harder than I'd ever loved anyone before. What was the harm in telling him so? After all, even if he couldn't verbally say it, his actions said it—he loved me too.

He scoffed, raising the cigarette to his mouth once more. "I think I'd know if I felt that way, sweetheart," he commented before inhaling again.

I sighed, hopping off the hood of the car. "You know you're not as tough as you think you are, Billy Hargrove."

He rolled his eyes, a sarcastic look appearing on his face. He leaned in and exhaled, blowing smoke just inches away from my face. "And you're not as smart as you think you are," he replied, almost daringly. "You think you've got me all figured out, huh?"

I ran a hand along his chest, patting lightly. "Trust me, big boy, I've had you figured out since the second I saw you step out of this Camaro and into the parking lot of Hawkins High."

"Is that so?" he smirked, lingering ever-so-close to my face.

"Uh huh," I nodded, "And I've figured out that what you feel for me… it's called love, Hargrove."

He rolled his eyes, licking his lips once more. "You're not gonna let it go, are you?"

"Never," I answered, shaking my head. "I mean, I've been waiting months for you to say it. I don't get why you're so scared of it. It's just a word, it's not gonna hurt you."

"It's more than just a word, Y/N," he protested. "It's actions. It's showing someone that they deserve to be loved. You don't just go throwing the L word around like it's confetti. In my eyes, it has to be earned."

I moved my arms up, dangling them over his shoulders. "Are you saying I haven't earned it?" I inquired, one eyebrow cocked upward.

He took a deep breath, eyes wandering for a few seconds. "No, I suppose you have earned it."

The air stayed silent for a beat, a comfortable silence. He ran a finger through my hair lightly, brushing some loose hairs behind my ear. I would have stayed like that all night if the universe had allowed me to.

"So?" I asked, finally breaking the silence.

"So?" he replied, his tone filled with sarcasm.

"I think you owe me something," I stated, "A certain four-letter word, perhaps?"

He scoffed, rolling his eyes. "Woman, you are so persistent," he chuckled.

"Thank you. I've heard my persistence is one of my better qualities," I told him, a giggle threatening to fall from my tongue.

He let out a long sigh, moving his hand back to my hair. "I guess I do—L word you, I mean."

I leaned in, placing my hands lightly against the material of his white tee shirt. I left a long and sweet kiss on his lips, feeling nearly dizzy when I registered that of all the mouths in Hawkins I could've kissed, I'd had the pleasure of kissing Billy's. "I guess I L word you too, Billy Hargrove."

-> Taglist: @ducky-is-dead-inside

#imagine #imagines #blurb #blurbs #one shot #one shots #billy hargrove #billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove x y/n #billy hargrove imagine #billy hargrove imagines #billy hargrove blurb #billy hargrove blurbs #billy hargrove one shot #billy hargrove one shots #billy hargrove fluff #stranger things #stranger things x reader #stranger things x y/n #stranger things imagine #stranger things imagines #stranger things blurb #stranger things blurbs #stranger things one shot #stranger things one shots #stranger things fluff #fanfic #fanfiction #fluff #honeysuckleharringtons

[sukunasbabygirl]

On a serious note with Percy’s character, I think part of the reason I myself am drawn to him is because he’s a very good portrayal of PTSD, especially because he touches on the aspects of it media tends to cover less.

PTSD, especially Complex PTSD, can often cause a person to do things that don’t just harm themselves, but harm others as well. It can sometimes, from personal experience, feel like there is a monster inside of you or that you a monster wearing a person’s skin. With C-PTSD, which is what Percy likely suffers from, there especially tends to be a difficulty with self identification, as that long-lasting trauma and repeated stress has made you unable to fully recognise who you were before as it has practically shaped your person.

Percy is not a good person either. He’s more akin to a bad person trying to do good things, someone very morally grey. You can, of course, still be a good person with trauma, just as much as you can be a bad one, although that’s a simplification of it. The point is, there are no rules as to where you end up after experiencing something traumatic - it differs. Percy, in this case, is someone who seeks vengeance to an unhealthy degree and his morals tend to rest in a very blurry, grey area because of that. He is someone filled with anger and resentment and he can bottle that up, but eventually he completely loses it and it all spills over. He is shown to be visibly scared and panicked, but he is also shown to be aggressive and unhinged, and these are things that can and do co-exist with PTSD.

He kills his tormentors in an act of revenge and does so mercilessly, believing his actions completely justified, whether they are is a question for another day, but the point here is that Percy walks a fine line where he nearly becomes more like his tormentors. That is an experience that hits very close to home. And what I appreciate is that even after defeating Orthax, he doesn’t stop being like this. Yes, he stops his plans for revenge and manages to calm down a bit, but you can still see the trauma evident in the way he acts*, he isn’t suddenly better by defeating his inner demons, those demons go beyond a physical manifestation. Trauma doesn’t just go away, and with C-PTSD - PTSD too for that matter - because these events have shaped your life, it’s very common for them to always be there, even if you’ve managed to heal.

* Editing just to clarify that his behaviours in season two and more subtle and he seems to be back in the repressing a majority of his emotions phase. His fear of being abandoned and his impulsive behaviours are definitely still visible though and he overcompensates a lot to make up for what happened with Vex, which, considering he was in his late teens when his family died, and he’s barely in his twenties now, it’s likely he, as many traumatised individuals do, puts blame on himself for what happened to his family as a way of processing and coping, and so to have killed Vex, that’s another person he’s responsible for. The overcompensating is another thing that hits painfully close to home. He’s not suddenly better in s2 but he’s also probably scared to express himself negatively anymore after what happened previously, and thats just as harmful for him, and it won’t end well. So I’m hoping season three addresses that.

Percy shows a range of the different effects trauma has, from a scared boy to a man filled with destructive anger, and I’m glad. Every time we get a portrayal of trauma that shows all the sides of the coin, whether they be ‘pretty’ or not, I gain a few extra years to my lifespan.

This is about the show specifically as I am still not on the Briarwood arc of the campaign, but perhaps I’ll add more to this when I do reach to that point.

#critical role #vox machina #the legend of vox machina #tlovm #percy de rolo #percival fredrickstein von musel klossowski de rolo iii #character analysis #cw ptsd #cw trauma #(tagging these just in case as I am not sure how to properly tag these sorts of posts)

[powderpinkprincess]

Forever [Legolas x human!reader]

⚠️ tw: mentions of sh (nothing detailed but it still could be triggering) ⚠️

Description: Legolas finds out a secret of yours

this one was a request from a lovely person ❤️ I hope you are going to like it

“Because days come and go

But my feelings for you are forever”

/Forever - Papa Roach/

***

You watched as Legolas wiped the blood off his sword with a piece of olive-green cloth. The flames of the small campfire contoured his features as if he stepped out of a painting, and you couldn’t take your eyes off him. He sensed your stare and glanced up, sending you a small smile. You smiled back.

The hushed conversation of the others made you feel warm on the inside. You belonged to them. But most importantly, you belonged to him. Legolas put his sword away and turned to Aragorn, who laid a palm on his shoulder. You didn’t even care what they were talking about, just enjoyed their company on this warm midsummer night.

This morning Legolas woke you all early, noticing a pack of Orcs near your spot for the night. Eventually, you all were forced to fight as the other safe way out was also surrounded by these foul creatures, and it was a miracle that none of you got seriously injured. You scored a small cut on your left arm, but it was nothing serious, so you took care of it by yourself.

You decided to check the wound once again before going to sleep, and with that, you grabbed the bag of healing supplies.

 “Let me help you,” Legolas stood immediately. He had been watching you.

 “There is no need,” you shook your head. Despite that, the Elf approached you. His eyes sparkled in a shade of dark blue in the half-light. You loved how he always made eye contact with you. It made you feel important to him, and his irises held such wise, infinite gentleness toward you… With his nearly 3000 years, he understood you more than anyone. He had seen enough to do so.

 “Legolas, go and eat something instead. There is no need for you to come with me,” you offered quietly as you held his stare.

 “Please,” he whispered to you in Elvish. You did not speak much Sindarin, only a couple of phrases he had taught you.

 “No,” you shook your head.

 “Why?”

 “You would not like it.” Your throat felt suddenly uncomfortably tight. You inhaled deeply.

 “What do you mean I would not like it? I am sure I had seen much worse.” His expression held pure confusion, and it made your heart heavy. You knew he tried hard to earn your trust. Each time you rejected him, it hurt you too. Especially when he was only trying to help you.

Yet you said nothing. You tightened your fist around the supplies in your hand and turned to leave where no one could see you. You thought he obeyed your wish, as he never tried to push your limits. You did not hear him follow you. Of course, his steps were light and quiet. When you stopped, his fingers brushed against your wrist, and you nearly screamed.

 “Forgive me, my love,” he apologized quietly.

 “You scared me,” you huffed. With your heart still beating fast, you did not notice he pushed up the sleeve of your shirt. He stopped in his tracks and furrowed his brows, pure concern clouding his face as a shadow. Your breaths became shallow. You felt dizzy.

So that was it.

You closed your eyes. You could not watch him leave. Not him, and not now when everything felt finally so perfect.

 “Who did this to you?” he asked quietly. You let out a shaky breath and forced yourself to look at him. He brushed his thumb against the scars on your forearm before raising his glance to meet yours again. His eyes held something strange you had never seen before. Pain.

 “An enemy,” you answered hesitantly.

 “What enemy?”

 “Myself.”

His expression changed. His lips parted lightly as he glanced back at your hand that he still held between his palms. You could not hold back your tears anymore. As he noticed the change in your breathing, he immediately pulled you closer to his body and wrapped his arms around your body. He stroked your hair while he lowered his head to whisper in your ear.

 “I will never stop loving you, no matter what. I promise.”

 “Don’t make a promise you can not keep,” you forced out through the unwanted sobs you did not expect to come merely a couple of minutes earlier.

 “This one I can because I chose it. My heart chose you and I decided to follow.” He put his fingers under your chin. “Look at me. I will never stop loving you. Do you believe me?”

 “I do,” you mumbled, mesmerized by his stare once again. You tried to ignore the nagging pain of doubt in your chest. You needed to trust him.

On this Earth where everything was so uncertain, you had to trust something. You had to trust him. He was nothing like where you came from. He was not even your kin. He was the most unexpected thing that ever happened to you. And he was with you now, here, holding you between his arms.

You pulled away and wiped your cheeks. He picked up the bag of supplies that fell from your hold and took your hand again to lead you to a trunk. He kneeled in front of you and reached for your sleeve again, but you pulled it away.

 “I am quite sure you can not see well in the darkness,” he noted simply, sending you the kindest, most gentle, pure smile you had ever seen. You teared up again. He reached up to stroke your cheek with a finger. “Let me help you, okay?”

You reluctantly let him take a hold of your hand again. You chewed on your bottom lip as you watched him work, carefully scrutinizing his face, looking for any sort of sign of insincerity. You found nothing but love.

 “Do not tell the others, please,” you asked all of the sudden.

 “Why would I?” he questioned with a frown.

 “I do not know,” you shrugged. You never gave out each others' secrets.

When he finished, he packed the items and pulled you up. Before taking a step, he brushed your hair behind your ear and leaned to kiss your forehead. You wrapped your arms around his neck, so he hugged your waist again. The moment said more than any words could.

Legolas led you back to the fire. He went to put the small bag away.

 “What was taking so long?” Pippin asked with a piece of bread in his hand, his gaze wandering from you to Legolas.

The Elf walked back to you and took a seat on the ground.

 “Don’t you see? They are in love!” Merry elbowed him with a giggle. “That is what was taking forever.”

You saw Legolas biting back a smile. His arm was touching yours, and for a casual observer it could have seemed accidental, but you knew it wasn’t. It was his way to show you that he was there for you, no matter what. Because his support, his love… That was going to take forever.

#legolas #legolas greenleaf #legolas thranduilion #legolas fanfiction #lotr #legolas imagine #legolas x y/n #legolas x you #lord of the rings #legolas x oc #legolas x reader