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#but the fact that he 'quit' only like  5 years ago and is now Back is objectively hilarious
ssprayberrythings · 2 months
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it'll be ok | LN4
lando norris x female!reader
warnings: unexpected pregnancy, talk of throwing up/being nauseous, suggestive actions implied if you get what i’m saying, early on pregnancy symptoms, mention of alcohol and being drunk (not the reader!!), lando being a simp for his girlfriend in every aspect of his life.
note: i know how pregnancy works and i’m not saying that reader got pregnant on this trip, her and lando are just h**ny 😭 (increased sex drive is a symptom of pregnancy though so..…) 
double note: i’m not sure how lily (oscar’s lily) is as a person but she seems like a sweetheart so i went off those vibes and i referred to alexandra by her full name cause if i said alex, someone might think alex albon lol 
okay thats it. enjoy 😉
word count: a little over 5k
masterlist | taglist
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You and Lando had been dating now for close to 2 years. You were happy with the life you were making with him and he was happy to have you by his side through his success. 
Everything was going great, at least it was up until 5 minutes ago. Now here you were sitting in the bathroom to the villa you had rented out for a vacation with friends, holding a pregnancy test not sure what to do with the fact that there were two lines looking back at you. 
48 Hours Before Finding Out
“Omg this is so much more prettier than the pictures” you said as you, Lando and some of your closest friends which included some of the other drivers and their girlfriends, walked into the villa 
“This is gonna be great” Lando exclaimed excitedly while wrapping an arm around your waist “Alright everyone get their rooms sorted and when you’re done, meet down by the beach” he told everyone, earning a round of “okays” and “sounds goods”. 
You and Lando made your way to the master suite on the second floor, seeing as you had been the ones to suggest the vacation and rent the villa, it was only fair you got the biggest room. 
“Lan I don’t know which bathing suit to wear” you asked as you stared at the bathing suits you had brought. 
“Doesn’t matter to me, either way it’ll end up on the floor later” he whispered in your ear as he came up behind you 
You blushed at his flirty remark “You’re naughty” you joked with him 
“Only for you” he reiterated as he put his hands on your hips and started kissing your neck 
“Lan if we start doing that, we’re never gonna leave” you tried being serious even though the shudder in your voice gave you away, telling Lando he was succeeding in distracting you. 
This happened quite frequently. Lando knew you so well and he made you feel things, none of your previous boyfriends had ever made you feel. 
He continued kissing your neck, knowing exactly where to put his lips. You felt yourself giving in with the way he was kissing you and how his hands were slowly moving down from your hips, you knew you wouldn’t be making it to the beach anytime soon. 
-
You and Lando eventually left your room, joining your friends on the beach. 
“Where the hell were you two” Max asked as he sat on a beach chair with everyone else doing their own thing 
“Y/N needed help picking a bathing suit” Lando responded smirking, knowing Max wouldn’t believe him but also knew he wouldn’t push for the truth, he was smart enough to put two and two together. 
“Babe I’m gonna go in the water, care to join?” Lando asked turning to you as your hands were interlocked 
“No I’m okay for now, I’m gonna try and tan a bit then I’ll come join you” you told him, he smiled at your answer and then gave you a quick kiss on the cheek and started making his way towards the water to join the friends of yours that were currently playing water volleyball. 
You spent the rest of your day in between tanning with the girls and playing in the water with Lando. Once everyone was done with the sun, you all made your way back to the house where you went to your perspective rooms to rest a little before you went out for dinner. 
You felt extra tired which on any other day you might be more concerned about but you had been travelling between time zones and then spent a significant amount of time in the sun, so in your head it made sense to be this tired. 
Once you had changed from your bathing suit into some clean undies and a oversized T-shirt, you crashed on yours and Lando’s bed where he was already sitting scrolling on his phone 
“Lan im gonna take a quick nap, wake me up in like an hour so I can start getting ready” you told him as you curled into a ball nuzzling your face into the pillows 
“Sure thing sweets” he said leaning down to kiss your head before going back to his phone, keeping one hand free to play with your hair knowing that always helped put you to sleep. 
-
Lando stayed true to his word and gently woke you up about an hour into your nap, not wanting to, seeing as you looked so peaceful but knowing you’d be upset if he let you sleep longer than you wanted.
“Babe” he said gently stroking his hand over your cheek 
“Hmm” you mumbled still half asleep 
“You wanted me to wake you so you could start to get ready” he told you smiling at how cute you looked 
“Why are you a good boyfriend and actually listen to what I say” you grumbled 
He chuckled “C’mon we can take a shower together, that’ll wake you up” he suggested knowing you’d get what he was implying 
You opened one eye looking at him to see if he was joking but knew he wasn’t when you saw the look in his eyes, this got you to open both eyes and slowly stretch, waking up fully in the process 
“Alright pretty boy let’s go” you said as you got off the bed causing a laugh to leave Lando as he got off the bed, following you into the bathroom. 
-
Once everyone including you and Lando were ready, you decided to visit a cute Italian restaurant nearby. Everyone in the group all loved Italian so it worked out perfectly. 
While you were walking to the restaurant, you felt a slight squeeze in your stomach but chalked it up to that all you had to eat today was some fruit and a small salad. 
Lately your appetite hadn’t been what it normally was, you pushed this thought aside though wanting to enjoy your vacation and deciding you’d worry about it once you got back home. 
After some walking you reached the restaurant, Charles taking point and speaking to the hostess in Italian to get a table. They brought you to the part of the restaurant that was more private and made sure there were enough seats for everyone. 
The host got you all menus and water, letting you know your server would be there momentarily. 
You politely smiled at her and offered her thanks in Italian, you may have loved everything Italian but your knowledge of the language didn’t go past basic phrases and words. 
You sat next to Lando and Lily, Oscars girlfriend. The two of you had gotten close with your boyfriends being teammates. You felt that squeeze in your stomach again, this time more intense so you casually reached for your water and hoped it would help. 
Once you had drank enough water to feel better, you went back to look at your menu 
“Baby are you okay? You just practically chugged your water” Lando asked quietly turning to you 
You nodded “Yeah, I'm good, I just didn’t realize how thirsty I was” you lied offering him a smile, he seemed to believe you and went back to the menu, Lily however offered you a strange look, having overheard your words and not fully believing you but deciding not to push. 
You could still feel that slight squeeze in your stomach and was apprehensive to order a large meal so you went for a simple soup, figuring it was the safest option. 
When everyone’s food arrived, you caught a whiff of the food around you and suddenly that squeeze in your stomach was becoming too much to handle. You didn’t want to bring attention to yourself but if you didn’t go to the washroom now, you weren’t sure what would happen so you turned to Lily.
“Lils I need your help” you whispered to the girl who had just taken a bite of her food 
“Is everything okay? You look pale” she asked concerned 
“I’m gonna throw up and desperately need to get away from the table” you explained trying to stuff the nausea down until you were somewhere else 
“Say no more” the girl said then turned to Oscar letting him know she was using the washroom, he smiled and moved out of the booth, luckily he was on the end 
“Y/N will you come with?” She asked, acting like the washroom was her idea and just wanted a friend to accompany her 
Your name sparked Lando’s interest and turned to face you 
“Babe I’ll be back im just gonna go to the washroom with Lily” you told him quickly before getting out of the booth, offering Oscar a small smile to say sorry for interrupting his meal 
Then you and Lily made your way to the washroom, as much as you would’ve preferred to run there, you didn’t want to seem weird so you casually bit your lip and hoped you could get there in time. 
“Girls are so strange in always wanting someone with them to go to the washroom” Lando said to Oscar eating his food 
Oscar just shrugged “I’m used to it at this point” he replied to his friend and teammate before both drivers went back to their previous conversation with the others around them. 
Meanwhile in the washroom, you were in a stall on your knees with your head over the toilet. Luckily Lily was there to hold back your hair and rub your back. 
“Are you okay? Did you eat something you shouldn’t have?” She asked after you were done and had stood up, using some tissues to wipe your mouth 
“I didn’t have anything weird to eat, just some fruit and a small salad” you told her as you fixed your hair and did your best to get the taste of vomit out of your mouth. Remembering you had gum in your purse and silently saying a prayer to your past self for putting it there. 
“That’s strange” she said even though you could sense there was more the girl wanted to say but held back 
“I don’t know how I'm gonna get through dinner. The smell of everything is what triggered this” you told her turning to her 
“Maybe just tell Lando you aren’t feeling the greatest and are gonna walk back to the Villa” she suggested 
“He wont let me go alone, he’ll want to join me and I don’t want to take him away from everyone” you explained 
“I’ll go back with you. I’ll just tell Oscar to bring my food home in a to go box” she offered 
“Are you sure Lils?” You asked the girl, feeling bad
“That’s what friends are for” she smiled
“Okay, let’s go then” you told her 
-
When you made your way back to the table, Lando looked at you, you could see there was some concern behind his eyes probably because of how long you had been in the washroom 
You slid in the booth to tell him you and Lily were gonna head back 
“I’m just not feeling super great and don’t want to take you away from everyone so Lily’s gonna walk back with me” you explained to him 
“Are you okay? What are you feeling? I’ll walk back with you, I don’t mind” he told you the concern only worsening 
“Babe I'm fine, really, I'm sure a good nights rest is all I need and then tomorrow I’ll be good” you reassured him, offering him a small smile 
“Okay but text me if you need anything or want me to come back” he told you which you nodded and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before getting out of the booth and walking to the exit with Lily. 
“Where’s Lily and Y/N going?” Charles asked 
“Y/N’s not feeling the great so they’re going back to the villa” Lando answered him 
Charles nodded then went back to talking to his girlfriend, Alexandra.
Lando shared a look with Oscar as both of their girlfriends had left them 
“Did Lily say anything?” Lando asked Oscar as they moved closer now that there was some space between them 
“No, just that she was going back with Y/N” he told him. He could see Lando was worried “I’m sure she’ll be fine and Lily will text if anything happens” Oscar did his best to reassure the Brit. Lando just nodded and silently went back to his food. 
-
24 Hours Before Finding Out
The next day, you had woken up and luckily you didn’t feel any feelings of nausea, hopefully that was an indicator that today was going to be different from yesterday and you could enjoy your trip. 
You got out of bed and made your way to the kitchen, you had a strange craving for orange juice which wasn’t normally your go to breakfast drink but you weren’t mad about it, seeing as the orange juice in the fridge was freshly squeezed. 
You smiled when you poured yourself a tall glass and went to sit on the patio furniture outside enjoying the beautiful view.
You pulled your phone out, scrolling through TikTok. You tried to avoid TikTok because most of the time you’d see videos of your boyfriend or any sort of f1 content but today you gave it a chance. 
So far it was going great until you saw a video of this creator explaining their battle with cancer and how they were finally in remission. You felt the tears gathering in your eyes but figured it was just your hormones and you being a sensitive person. 
Then you moved from TikTok to Instagram and saw a post about puppy adoptions and suddenly you couldn’t hold the tears back and that’s how Lando found you, crying over your phone 
“Babe what’s wrong?” He asked instantly pulling the chair next to you, rubbing your back 
“These puppies, they’re all up for adoption” you told him, showing him the rescue centre’s instagram highlighting all the dogs they had up for adoption. 
Lando found you the cutest for crying over dogs “Why are you crying though?” he asked still rubbing your back 
You shrugged, wiping your eyes with the back of your sleeve “I don’t know, they just all look so cute and I want them to find their forever homes” you tried to explain why you were crying, even if you didn’t fully understand why. 
“You’re adorable” he smiled at you “How about when we get back, we can try and organize an adoption event with the centre, I’m sure the attention from an f1 driver should help” he suggested.
He would do anything to see you smile even if that meant having to talk with his PR manager about organizing a puppy adoption event sponsored by McLaren. 
The idea brought a smile to your face and you sniffled “Thats really sweet of you Lan” you told him 
“We’ll get all those dogs adopted” you leaned over giving your boyfriend a hug. The tears had subsided which Lando was grateful for, he hated seeing you cry. 
He hugged you back, kissing the top of your head “Anything for you sweets” he reassured you. 
-
After your moment, you and Lando joined the rest of your friends inside. You all enjoyed a nice breakfast together, then once the dishes were dealt with, you all went your own ways, everyone wanting to do something different. 
You and Lando planned to go take some pictures around the area. That was one of the things that drew you two to each other, both having a passion for photography. 
On your first date, you spent so much time sharing pictures and the stories that went with them so when you started dating, it became something you did together, whenever you could. 
You were walking up to your room when Kika called your name. You turned looking in the direction of where your name had come, seeing Kika sticking her head out of her and Pierre’s room.
“Whats up? Is everything okay?” you asked as you approached their room. 
“Yeah, I just was wondering if you had a tampon or a pad, I got my period and just realized I didn’t bring anything” she chuckled 
“Oh yeah, I have tampons in my room. I’ll bring you a few to get you through until you can go to a local store” you told the girl, she smiled at you “Thank you, youre an angel” 
You just smiled and then turned walking to your room, going straight to the washroom, to look through your toiletries bag. As you looked at the mini travel sized bag you brought filled with tampons, it hit you, you had never gotten your period. 
You were supposed to get it right before the trip and the last few days of your period should’ve been the first couple days you were away but as you got ready for vacation, you still hadn’t gotten it which was why you brought a weeks worth figuring you’d end up getting it on the trip but you still hadn’t gotten it and that sparked a fear within you. 
You quickly grabbed a few for Kika and closed the bag. As you turned to leave the washroom, you bumped into Lando “Oh sorry babe” you told him, you must’ve seemed frazzled judging by the expression Lando offered you 
“Are you okay?” he asked “Oh yeah, just need to give something to Kika” you told him hiding the tampons behind your back.
Obviously Lando knew what a period was, having a mother, 2 sisters and a girlfriend, he was used to it and had they been for you, you wouldn’t have cared but you didn’t want to make Kika uncomfortable so you with held those details from him. 
“Oh okay..well I’m ready to go whenever you want to go take some photos” he told you, offering you his typical Lando smile. You smiled, leaning up to kiss his lips “I can be ready in a few minutes” you told him once you pulled away. 
Then moved around him, being sure he couldn’t see what was behind your back before leaving the room, walking to Kika’s. You knocked on the door, she answered almost immediately  “You’re my lifesaver. I owe you” she told you once you handed her the tampons. 
“Really glad you said that, I need you to get me something from the store whenever you go” you told her biting your bottom lip, something you did when you were nervous 
“What’s up?” she asked 
“Can you get me a couple pregnancy tests” you whispered, not wanting anyone to hear. Kika’s eyes grew in size “Woah, really?” she confirmed, you just nodded, not saying anything. 
“Yeah of course. Want me to leave them in your suitcase while you’re out?” she offered 
“That’d be great. Thank you” you told her 
“Do you really think you’re” she started before gesturing to your stomach instead of saying the word 
“Honestly I’m not too sure, it didn’t cross my mind until moments ago when I realized I missed my period” you explained, she nodded along 
“Well you aren’t alone regardless of the results. We’re all here for you” she reassured you, you smiled at her words. 
“Thanks Kika, I appreciate that” you told her “Anyways I should go and get ready, Lan and I are going to take some photos around the area, I’ll see you later” you told her offering her a goodbye before walking back to yours and Lando’s room. 
You quickly changed into something clean, washed your face, tied your hair into a high ponytail and then slipped on your converse to go meet Lando downstairs. 
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fan2: they’re so cute 
fan3: y/n giving us the lando content 
fan4: the y/nlando crumbs 
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-
You and Lando ended up having an awesome time. You walked around and took plenty of photos. Yours were of the area, some of the locals, some of Lando, a good variety meanwhile Lando’s were mostly of you. 
He called you his muse the first time you asked him why he took so many pictures of you but by now you had grown used to it and didn’t question it. 
In the midst of walking around, you had grabbed a quick bite to eat at a cute cafe. You went with a fruit parfait and water, figuring it was the safest option not wanting to risk being sick. 
After being out for a couple hours, you eventually made your way back to the villa. When you got back, you got a text from Kika after passing her in the kitchen. 
Kika: ‘They’re in your suitcase, under a pile of bathing suits’ 
You quickly texted her back 
Y/N: ‘Thank you. Now I owe you’ 
Kika: ‘If you end up having a girl, name her Francisca 😌’
You laughed, not answering her but rather hearting the message then going to find the tests. 
When you walked into your room, you heard Lando in the washroom, so you checked your suitcase to double check where they were and then once you had confirmation, covered them back up. 
You had plans with everyone to go out tonight so you wouldn’t be able to test until tomorrow. You weren’t sure how you were gonna avoid drinking tonight. 
It’s not as if you were a heavy drinker, you just enjoyed doing shots while you were out and you could handle your alcohol well so nights out never phased you. 
Tonight however to be cautious incase you were pregnant you had to avoid alcohol. 
You sighed, so far this trip you had spent more time stressed out then relaxed and you weren’t sure how much more you could handle before you exploded from the uncertainty. 
You heard Lando finishing in the washroom so you quickly grabbed an outfit from your suitcase before shutting it. 
“I thought you were gonna join me in the shower” Lando said when he walked out, his curls wet from the water
“Sorry my love, I took too long trying to figure out what to wear” you lied, offering him a soft smile 
“It’s okay, I can think of a couple ways you can make it up to me” he winked at you, you blushed. 
“Your cheeky” you told him smiling as he laughed at your comment. 
You quickly got yourself ready and then you made your way downstairs with Lando to meet everyone else. Once everyone was ready to go, you made your way to the local club. 
On the way, Kika linked her arm with yours and walked a bit up from the boys. 
“Did you test?” She asked in a low tone, you subtly shook your head 
“I need your help tonight avoiding alcohol” you replied keeping your voice low 
She nodded “Don’t worry, we’ll get you a mocktail at the bar and you can either sip on it through the evening or keep going back for the same one. Then with shots, we’ll tell the bartender to give you water” she explained still keeping her voice low, you offered her a small smile 
“I don’t know what I would do if you weren’t here. You and Lily have both been the best” you exclaimed, Kika just smiled and gave you a side hug 
“That’s what friends do” she told you.
-
Once you got to the club, Kika went to get your drinks and made sure to tell the bartender the plan. The bartender was a female and without even having to explain why, somehow she understood and told Kika to always give you the shot with a rounder base. 
So far everything had been going smoothly and once people became more intoxicated, it was easier to let loose and not keep up the show as much as you had been. 
Surprisingly you were having a great time sober, just getting to dance with everyone and enjoy being with your friends, this was exactly what you needed and it took your mind off what you had to do tomorrow. 
Currently you were dancing with Lando, his hands were on your waist and you could smell the alcohol on his breath. It didn’t bother you as much as you thought it would. 
“Babyyyyy” he said into your ear due to the loud music 
“Yes Lan?” You asked laughing at your boyfriends behaviour 
“I love youuu” he told you stretching out the you. You smiled at him 
“I know. I love you too” you told him running a hand through his curls, he closed his eyes enjoying the feeling 
“Can we go back to our place, I just want to be alone with you” he told you, pulling you closer and nuzzling his face in your neck, breathing in your perfume.
“What about our friends?” You asked him, even though you knew they’d be fine and you wouldn’t mind alone time with Lando
“They’ll be fine” he said as he started kissing your neck, you shuddered a bit at the sensation. 
“Don’t start doing that here or we won’t be able to stop” you told him even though you didn’t want him to stop 
“I don’t want to stop” he said pulling his lips away to answer you before leaning down and kissing you. 
You felt yourself getting weaker in the knees. This was the effect Lando had on you. 
“Okay fine, let’s leave then” you said in between breaths, he smiled and then grabbed your hand, intertwining his with yours and carefully made his way to the door. 
“Where are you going?” Kika asked as you passed her and Pierre 
“Back to the Villa. See you later, stay safe” you told her quickly offering a wave over your shoulder 
She chuckled “Children having a child” she muttered under her breath 
“What did you just say?” Pierre asked his girlfriend 
Kika didn’t think he had heard with the music “Nothing” she quickly said 
“No I swear you said” he started but she stopped him before he could finish. 
“Pierre just drop it for now. Please” she asked. The look they shared said enough. He nodded and then they went back to dancing. 
She hoped he wouldn’t say anything further on the topic, her boyfriend had a tendency to spread gossip even if it wasn’t always intentional but hopefully this time, he’d keep it to himself. 
Back at the Villa, you and Lando were having a great time and took advantage of the empty house, getting to be loud as you pleased. If you weren’t already pregnant, there’s a good possibility after tonight, you might’ve been. 
-
Moments Before Finding Out
The next morning, you woke up wrapped in the duvet and Lando. You smiled at how peaceful he looked. Then you remembered what you had to do and suddenly you felt the nerves creep back up on you. 
You sighed and carefully got out of bed, being sure not to wake Lando. Thankfully he was a heavy sleeper when he had been drinking. 
You crept over to your suitcase, finding the pregnancy tests and taking them to the washroom. You had googled that testing in the morning was the best time so that’s what you were doing. 
You locked the door and then opened the first box. Taking the test and sitting on the toilet. You quickly peed on the stick and then placed it back on the counter, on top of a piece of toilet paper. You finished up and then pulled your sleep shorts back up and set the timer on your phone. Sitting on the edge of the toilet. 
You closed your eyes trying your best to keep your breathing steady. Everything would be fine. Lando loved you and even if this was unexpected, he wouldn’t leave you, at least you didn’t think he would, he wasn’t like that. You did some more deep breaths until your timer went off and you quickly silenced it not wanting to wake up Lando. 
You shakily stood up from the toilet and with your shaking hands, reached for the test and that’s when you saw, the two lines looking up at you, indicating you were pregnant.
-
After Finding Out
After the first positive, you had to do the other 3 tests to be sure and of course those all came back positive. You put them back in one of the boxes and just stood there in shock. 
You were pregnant. You were going to be a mom and Lando was going to be a dad. You wanted to cry but you also knew once you started you wouldn’t be able to stop. 
You weren’t sure how long you stayed in the washroom until you heard Lando call your name, you knew you had to tell him now or else you’d drive yourself mad keeping it in. 
You opened the door and made your way back to the bed. Seeing Lando sitting up rubbing his eyes, he must’ve just woken up.
“Lan, I need to tell you something” you told him biting your lip due to your nerves. He looked confused 
“Is everything okay? Did something happen?” He asked as you made your way to sit next to him. You sat with your feet tucked under you 
You reached for his hand “Nothing happened” you reassured him then took a deep breath before continuing
“I’m pregnant” you told him trying to keep your voice steady and calm not wanting to show your nerves, already knowing Lando would have plenty of his own. 
“Sorry but I think I heard you incorrectly; did you say pregnant?” He asked rubbing his eyes to make sure he wasn’t dreaming. 
You nodded your head, not sure what was going through his mind at the moment. You sat in silence for what felt like a lifetime, the longer the more nervous you got. 
Lan was never speechless and this scared you “Lan please say something” you said, feeling yourself wanting to cry even more now 
He must’ve sensed you were on the verge of tears “Baby I'm sorry, come here” he said opening his arms which you gladly accepted and buried your head in his chest, the tears finally leaving. 
“It’s unexpected but it’ll be okay. We’ll figure it out together” he said rubbing your back “I love you and there’s no one else I’d want to have children with, I just thought it’d be a bit further down the road but this is okay. Baby’s are a good thing regardless of when they come” he told you. 
You pulled away, wiping your eyes “So you aren’t gonna leave?” You asked as you hiccuped 
“Not a chance. You’re stuck with me for life now” he told you smiling. You returned the smile finally feeling better. 
You and Lando spent the rest of the morning cuddled up, talking about your baby, what you thought they’d look like, how they’d act, if they were a boy or a girl. 
At some point you must’ve started to drift off cause you found yourself cuddled up next to Lando as he played with your hair, subconsciously your hand found its place on your stomach and Lando kissed your head. 
He loved you and would do anything for you and now that meant your baby as well. The two of you were his world and he planned on spending the rest of his life making sure you both knew how much he loved you both. 
-
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AH! I hope you all enjoyed this <3 I had such a fun time writing it and I'm proud of how it turned out! Im always open to feedback so please share your thoughts !
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crvptidgf · 8 days
Text
Pogue Gone Rogue • pt. I
Rafe Cameron x Routledge!Reader
➸ summary: following a nasty divorce with Big John, your mother moved you to Figure 8, separating you from your step-brother and his group of misfits. 5 years later you’ve integrated into the kook life, but what happens when your estranged brother tries to bring you back to the pogue ways?
➸ warnings/notes: best friend’s brother trope, rafe isn’t crazy in this (sort of), heavy daddy issues from both reader and rafe, secret relationship, some strays from canon, eventual smut (18+)
A/N: i am NOT a ward apologist, but i had to glaze the guy for the sake of the story ok i'm sorry
word count: 2.8k
next part
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THE TRANSITION FROM Pogue to Kook was rough and daunting at first. You had lived on the Cut for as long as you could remember. Even though you were born in Kook territory, you were fully raised on Pogue turf. You never thought that you would live a life outside of it.
Now as you stood in front of your vanity, pearl necklace dangling from your neck, you couldn't imagine life any other way.
Figure 8 has been your home for 5 long years now. It was where you graduated, where you had your first boyfriend and your first job - it was where you met your best friend. Sarah Cameron.
When you were first whisked away from home, you were 15. John B, JJ, and Pope were your best friends; until they weren't. Time passed and they eventually forgot about you, saying that you were long lost to the 'Kook ways' and you were soon replaced by Kie. This was a fact that Sarah did not take lightly.
She had raved on and on about how much she hated Kiara, about how John B should've stuck by you as your step-brother. She was the first person to truly understand you and have your back.
Grabbing the duffle bag on your bed, you began to make your way downstairs.
Your mother was out of town on business and Sarah had offered you to come over to her house for a few days. It was an ongoing tradition of yours. When you had the house to yourself she always insisted that you shouldn't have to stay home alone. In recent years, since you were both adults, you tried getting her to sleep over in yours instead, but Ward wouldn't be caught dead letting his 'baby' leave the house for days on end.
So agreeing with his compromise of allowing you to live with Sarah whenever you wanted, you decided to buy him a bottle of whiskey as a token of gratitude.
The only issue you ever had at the Cameron's estate was Rafe.
It wasn't the same issue everybody else had with him. In fact it was quite the opposite. You see, your frequent visits to Tannyhill had caused you and him to form a sort of… friendship. If you could call it that.
Occasionally when Sarah would go on dates with Topper, Rafe would bring you outside for a drink or two and a chat. He would claim that he felt bad that Sarah 'left you' for her boyfriend. You couldn't complain. Rafe was cute. He was nice when he wanted to be (or had to be), and he was never rude with you. Well, never intentionally. Sometimes he just had a certain sour attitude about him - but that was just how he was.
"Honey, I'm home!" you called out into the vast mansion.
Ward had given you a key to the house months ago saying that if anything were to ever happen, you would come to them. Whatever that meant. You figured he was just looking out for you as Sarah's friend.
A squeal sounded around the white walls as your friend came running towards you, her little sandals clacking across the floor. She scooped you up into a hug, rocking you from side to side.
"Okay, okay!" you giggled. "Don't hug me too hard or I'll drop your dad's gift."
"Oh you didn't have to," she said as she grabbed the fancy bottle from your hands.
Ward always had a soft spot for you, something Rafe never failed to mention and grumble about. He was kind of like a father-figure to you. Your own dad was never too present in your life. Despite his immense love for your mother and step-brother, it felt like you were constantly cast aside, which is probably why your mother left his sorry ass.
"Here she is. Kook princess number two." Rafe.
Your heart sputtered as you turned to face him. Damn, he looked good.
Sarah rolled her eyes. She never liked encouraging his stupid nicknames for you. After all, Rafe was a player and she didn't want you falling for his stupid tricks.
"Well if it isn't the Kook prince himself," you replied back. Rafe scoffed as he came up to Sarah to examine the bottle that she took from you.
"This is a good brand. Nice choice, princess."
If you weren't in the presence of his sister you probably would've passed out at the mere tone of voice he used. How was it that he was always so effortlessly hot? Sometimes it felt like he was deliberately trying to make you flustered. You pushed the thought from your mind. He was only being friendly - he had to be, you were always at his house.
"Stop flirting with my friend," Sarah said as she dragged you by the hand to bring you upstairs. "Perv," she mumbled under her breath which earned a laugh from you.
"He was just being nice."
Continuing up the stairs, Sarah turned her head behind to look at you. "Rafe is never just being nice."
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IT WAS NIGHTFALL now and you were getting dressed for a kegger that was being thrown at the beach. You were never really one for big parties but Sarah was excited to go, so you agreed.
You were glad you decided to bring your makeup with you as you stood in the bathroom with your various brushes and powders.
"Hey, babe," said Sarah as she patted your waist while walking past you. "I'm so sorry to ask you but can you use Rafe's bathroom?"
This wasn't new to you. Rafe would let you use his mirror and shower when this one was occupied, but for some reason you would get nervous each time. Knowing he was only a few meters away from you always sent chills down your spine.
"Sarah," you groaned.
"I'm sorry but I need to use the shower!"
You gave in, sighing and nodding. This was her bathroom after all. Collecting all your things, you made your way down the hall to her brother's room. The door opened after one knock and you presumed he already knew why you were there.
"Got kicked out again?" Rafe asked as he moved to let you in. You only hummed in response as you made your way through his room swiftly. His room was almost as familiar as Sarah's considering you were in here at least one out of every two visits to their house.
Rafe let out a chuckle. "Sure, make yourself at home," he said once he saw you tumbling the contents of your makeup bag onto the sink counter.
"Don't you have to get ready? Stop bugging me, Cameron."
"I am ready, Routledge," he snarked back.
Your back straightened at the name. "Don't call me that."
Rafe put his hands up in defense, walking into the bathroom to grab his comb. He never really knew what happened between you and your brother and he never asked (because he knew better than to dig into people's family problems). Moving to stand behind you, he brushed his hair out, his eyes following your movements as you applied your mascara.
"Do you really have to do that here?"
Rafe rolled his eyes with a smile. "You're in my bathroom. You don't get to tell me what to do."
"I'm not telling you anything, I'm asking a question," you said. This was how your conversations always went. He would say something sarcastic and you would quip with something similar. It was like you two bounced off of each other's behaviors.
"Maybe I just like watching you."
Pulling out your lip-gloss, you snorted. He always found a way to jokingly flirt with you no matter the situation. Sarah thought it was annoying, but you? You secretly liked it. It was times like these where you could pretend that he wasn't your best friend's brother, but perhaps something more.
That would never happen though. It was hopeless to wish for it.
"Well, when you decide to stop being creepy can you please grab my shoes from downstairs?"
"And now you're bossing me around," Rafe muttered as he leaned down behind you to place his comb on the sink in front of you. You could smell his woody cologne as his back pressed against your shoulder ever so slightly. It was like he knew how to drive you crazy.
By the time he returned, you were already changed into your outfit. Sarah convinced you to wear a mini-dress. She raved on and on about how it was too warm for jeans and you just had to wear it.
"Maybe you can even catch a few guys' eyes," she had said with a wink. Little did she know that the only eyes you wanted to catch were her brother's.
Rafe paused when he walked back into his bathroom. There you were in all your glory, your hands ruffling up your perfectly curled hair. He mentally thanked Sarah for making you wear the dress. You looked stunning - and he chastised himself for even thinking it. You were his sister's best friend, he shouldn't be saying things like that.
"You're gonna wear that?" Rafe teased as he clutched your sneakers in his hand.
"And you're gonna wear that?" you mimicked, eyeing his plain button up and slacks.
Shoving past him, you grabbed the shoes and went to sit on his bed. The mattress bounced as you made yourself comfortable. Rafe's bed was unusually high and you struggled to tie the laces as you leaned down. Your short dress was not practical enough for this.
"This is pathetic to watch. Let me."
Walking to you, he kneeled on the floor in front of his bed, patting his knee. "Here, lift your leg."
The visual of him on his knees before you made your breath stutter. Not-so innocent images playing in your mind as you placed your foot on his thigh. His breath tickled the inside of your ankle.
You prayed to everything that he would do this fast because you weren't sure how much you could handle. Warmth spread throughout your body as Rafe took the other leg in his hand and put your foot on his knee, his fingers moving nimbly to tie this shoe as well.
Skin buzzing at the ghost of his touch, you quickly stood up and marched to the bathroom. You cleaned your items up at the speed of light and vacated his room, throwing a 'thanks' over your shoulder as you left.
By the time you three arrived to the party it was already in full swing.
Sarah skipped over to her boyfriend, encasing him in an embrace. You jokingly grimaced and gave Rafe a look. You liked teasing Sarah about how touchy she was with Topper but, really, you thought they were cute.
"Drink?" he asked.
You nodded. "Drink."
Both walking to the drink stand, you grabbed a bottle of beer and Rafe did the same. You guys were not too fond of the drink - you found this out during one of your late night chat sessions after Sarah snuck out to meet Topper - but the situation called for some sort of inebriation. I mean, it was a party.
"Out of everybody here, who would have the highest chance of taking you home tonight?" Rafe asked, completely shocking you.
You took a swig of the beverage you held before pondering. Realistically the answer would be Rafe, but you couldn't exactly admit that.
Making a face at the taste of the alcohol, you shook your head. "God, none of them."
The man side-eyed you, raising an eyebrow. "No one at all?" he asked, his voice lowering as he moved closer to you by a bare inch.
Swallowing down the spit that had formed in your mouth, you shrugged. You couldn't even look at him for fear that you would say something you regretted. Every time you were alone with Rafe it felt like everything inside of you was on fire. Half the time you weren't sure if he saw you as just one of Sarah's friends or if he actually liked talking to you. He was just so difficult to figure out.
The feeling of someone's breath on your ear awoke you from your thoughts. Rafe was leaning down to your level, his eyes boring into you.
"Because I know who I'd wanna take home," he moved a piece of hair from your face as you craned your neck to face him. Holy shit. This was not real -
A loud yell interrupted the moment, both you and Rafe jumping at the intrusion. People were screaming in the distance, some sort of commotion happening near the shore.
You were first to move, leaving your drink as you neared the altercation. Upon closer inspection you recognized John B and JJ. What where they doing here?
However you barely had time to wonder anything else as you witnessed Topper throw a punch directly to your brother's face, causing him to tumble down into the water. You ran up to your friend, holding onto her arm.
"Sarah, what happened?"
She was practically hyper-ventilating at this point, holding her chest. "I- I don't know. They just got here and Topper, he-"
The rest of her words were jumbled and incomprehensible. The only thing you could do was rub her back in comfort. Looking around you noticed Kiara and Pope were also there, a worried look on their faces.
"Hey!" you directed it to the duo standing in the sand, "what the fuck is going on?"
Kiara opened her mouth to speak, but she quickly stopped once she noticed something happening in the water.
Turning your head to see what she was staring at, you gasped. Topper was shoving your brother's head under the ocean, his eyes glazed over with a certain fury that you had never seen before.
You ran up, not caring that your shoes were now full of saltwater. "Topper, stop!"
He only pushed you in reply, your ass hitting the sand harshly. Before you could do anything else JJ appeared, a soft click sounding through the air. Suddenly Topper tensed, his eyes locking onto yours in fear. Of course JJ had a fucking gun.
Faintly hearing people scramble away, you stood up to your feet, ignoring the fact that Sarah and Rafe were screaming at you to get out of the water.
"JJ!" you shouted, "stop it."
Sarah ran towards the water, her dress whirling in the wind. You paid no mind to her as you watched Topper let go of John B. Wading towards your brother, you helped him stand up, his breath heavy and his eyelids drooping. Rafe stood next to his sister as he looked at you in concern, making sure no one pulled anything else.
A gunshot rang through the air and you flinched. "Hey, sis," coughed out John B, water shooting out from his nose and mouth. You fought the urge to slap him.
"Don't 'hey sis' me," you grumbled as you dragged him to shore. You knew you would have to evacuate soon enough. The gunshot had to have alerted any nearby cops, and you did not want to be here when they arrived. Dropping John B onto the sand, you walked past him.
Grabbing JJ's gun, you threw in onto the floor. “The fuck is wrong with you? Are you stupid?"
He made a mix between a scowl and a sneer as he turned away from you. Picking the gun back up, he went to help John B.
"She's right, JJ," said Pope. He was always the one with his head on his shoulders. "You shouldn't be waving a gun around. Especially not around here."
His friend ignored him.
"I came to see you," John B's voice came. "Dad's gone."
You whipped your head around. So much was happening all at once, and you didn't know how to handle it. Rafe was at the far end of the beach, scolding Topper while Sarah tried to calm him down, presumably pleading with her brother to let go of her boyfriend's collar. Kiara and JJ were holding John B up while he regained his strength. And you - well you were trying to figure out what your brother's statement even meant.
"He's dead?" you asked.
"No. He's missing. He's been missing for months."
You widened your eyes in disbelief. "And you're only telling me now?"
Pope gave you a sympathetic look but you turned away. You didn't want to deal with any pity right now. How could they keep this from you for so long? Sure, you never had a great relationship with your father, but you had the right to know this information sooner rather than later.
"Dude, you are unbelievable," you muttered before completely turning around and making your way off the beach.
It was safe to say that the car ride back to Tannyhill was painfully awkward that night.
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yeahspider · 2 months
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let the light in
Ve’s note - soft fic about chan going back home to australia . this is so fluffy and warm . he is just so lovely and writing about him makes me happy(im drunk as usual so this is sparsely proofread my bad) no warnings sfw !! enjoy <3
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the sun was setting as you were finishing up your closing tasks at your parent's record store. picking up a record from the bin you blew gently on it, watching as dust flew off and into the air. this place could use a good dusting you thought to yourself. the clock hit five signifying the end of your shift. at 5:01 the bell above the door chimed alerting you that someone entered.
“we’re closed sorry” you quickly said without looking at who entered. you were tired and ready to eat. you went to grab your purse and head out but stopped seeing the person standing in the doorway. it felt like your heart jumped out of your chest when you made eye contact with Chris.
“I know I'm sorry I was just hoping you’d make an exception for an old friend,” he said with a shy smile. a smile that made your heart swell even if it's been years since you’ve seen it in person. the setting sun illuminated his body. hair in its naturally curly state, teeth on full display. he looked like the young boy who you once loved. the same boy who chased his dream but broke your heart in the process. you could never blame him though. it’s not like you ever confessed. too scared of rejection and unwilling to hold him back from his potential.
“of course, I always have time for you its been so long,” you say to him as you usher him to a chair. your mind still catching up to the fact that he was actually in front of you. tentatively you reached out and brushed his hand, discreetly checking to see if he was real. this was a moment you’ve only dreamed of. chris was still all smiles as you sat across from him.
“i’m sorry i never came to see you sooner. i always meant to but i just chickened out everytime.” he admitted with a blush rising to his cheeks . you wanted to cup his face to feel the blood rush under his skin..
“Why would you chicken out am I that scary,” you say jokingly.
“well i used to have a massive crush on you that i never really got over and i didn’t want it to be weird between us. didn’t want to ruin the familiarity.” he said as a blush ran up his neck. familiarity ? what does that even mean ? and what did he mean he had feeling sfor you? that your pining wasnt singular, but shared. your mind races as seconds drag on after his confession. you cant seem to find the words to decribe what you feel right now. are you relieved? scared? happy? nothing feels quite right.
"I'm sorry i didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. let's just forget about it. how have you been?" Chris said trying to save the moment. You could see the embarrassment tinted on his ears.
"wait- you didnt make me uncomfortable i was just shocked. i ..." you hesiated to admit you felt the same way. but he waited for you . your chris . ever so patient. ever so understanding.
"i've had a crush pn you for years." you finally admit. feeling a weight lift off your chest, the pressure in your ears lessening. "ever since you first picked me up from that party years ago. youve always been there for me, even when you were thousands of miles away you checked up on me. so the feelings only grew overtime."
"Are you serious? You've had feelings for me this whole time? I thought you just viewed me as some foolishly ambitious boy. I never thought you would want someone like me." he says, with a look between sadness and relief on his face. you guys have been dancing around each other for years. two idiots in love.
"you were never a fool to me channie. I believed in you wholeheartedly and still do. i always knew you would make your dreams happen."
"let me take you out somewhere. we should reconnenct i want to relearn everything about you, if youll let me." chris said. nothing but smiles and dimples.
of course you agreed. you let him learn everything as long as you could do the same
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yorackerman · 1 year
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the happinness that we deserve
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synopsis: former enemies share a heartfelt conversation as the world around them is ending and make each other one last promise.
tags: love confession, first kiss, slight angst/bitterness, fluff, proposal if you squint
word count: 3.2k
cw: none
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The look you exchanged with him as he transformed in front of your very eyes was a sight that had not once left you, it haunted your nights and your daydreams. A look that made you wonder if there was more to it. There had to be more. You wanted there to be more.
But alas, as he escaped with Eren and no remorse, you realized that there wasn’t anything at all and all the years you’d spent with him, building this friendship that probably covered something more, was nothing. All your trust had been built on lies and dirty secrets.
And once again, when you and your comrades had to go after Eren and you got to stand on the armored titan’s shoulder, you promised Reiner a painful death. You promised that you’d kill him with your very hands for daring to play with your heart like that. You knew he could hear all of your words and you hoped they hurt but deep down, you knew very well that they did not.
After all, you were just one of the hundreds of people he had lied to for 5 years, an insignificant worm that stood in his way and he was the armored titan. The man responsible for the death of many, including Eren’s mother. Your words held no meaning and neither did your rage and your sadness.
Yet you bore them within your heart for as long as you could as they were the only thing keeping you alive but like all things, they ended up losing their meaning as well and you almost forgot why you hated him so much in the first place. Maybe you were still naive, but after all… you didn’t get to speak this through with him.
There had to be more to it, right?  
Time had passed and anger and hatred left place for bitterness and numbness. Your murderous ideas had long left you, just like he did, 4 years prior. Since then, days had been but a mere copy of one another, making you lose track of time. You couldn’t really believe that it had been 4 years since Reiner betrayed your trust and left you alone in Paradis. But the passing time made itself visible on your face as well as your friends’. As young as you were, the drain and tiredness that you had been bearing since encountering the outside world was visible and painfully obvious.
Still, you couldn’t recall everything that had happened and when exactly your hatred for Reiner started fading away, making it possible for you to stand in front of him without feeling the need to strangle him, just like you were doing right now. Was it when Eren started the rumbling which would most likely lead you and your comrades to death? Or was it before that, when you saw what life outside of the walls was like and when you too were forced to kill innocent people?
You decided to stop pondering as it held no importance anymore. You probably didn’t have much left to live and neither did Reiner. Even if he was to survive the rumbling somehow, his term would end soon. Both of you were screwed and as hateful as you could be, you didn’t wish to die with hatred in your heart.
“You’ve changed.”
You raised our eyebrows at his words, quite surprised that out of all the things he could’ve told you after years of not seeing each other he went with… that. You eyed him from head to toe, observed his features and the passage of time and marks of stress written all over his face as well as the beard that made him look much more grown than when you last saw him. His body had changed too, he was taller and looked stronger.
But what was more noticeable, was the constant pain his eyes bore. He did not look as confident as he did years ago. In fact, he looked sad, in despair even. Like the guilt had finally caught up to him and was eating him alive. His eyes did not shine like they once did, and he did not carry this “know-it-all” aura he did back when he was a soldier.  
In front of you stood a different Reiner. Or perhaps was it the real Reiner, the one he always was but concealed for the duration of his mission, who the hell knew at this point? This man whom you swore you knew turned out to be a complete mystery and if he was able to hide that he was the armored titan, he was very much capable of hiding his true personality as well.
“You changed too.” You finally spoke. “You look miserable now.”
“Can’t say that I’m not.”
“Yeah… why did you follow me?”
You shot a quick glance at the small campfire where your friends and enemies sat together while eating Hange’s stew. You had left a bit to take breath alone and gather your thoughts but before you could think anything, the warrior was already behind you. From where you stood, no one could hear, but you could be seen, in fact, you could feel the cart titan’s eyes on you from time to time, or perhaps was it just because its eyes were positioned this way…
When you looked back at Reiner, he seemed to be lost in his thoughts. His eyes were glued on you, but they looked as dead as ever. You tilted your head to the side, waiting for his reply which appeared to have brought him back to reality.
“I just wanted to be alone with you, I…” He marked a pause, seeming to question himself. “I missed you.”
“You what?”
“I missed you. I’m glad you’re alive after all this time.” He sighed. “You’re really… as strong as I expected you to be.”
You took a few steps back to lean against a tree, thus hiding your figure from your friends near the campfire. Reiner stood at you side, making himself visible to the other as you looked at the dark ground below your feet, replaying his words in your head. So there was more to it after all. It seemed, that despite the circumstances, he never really regarded you as an enemy… or maybe he did, but just like you, grew out of it.
“Well, I did have for goal to kill you one day. Vengeance pushes people to stay alive, you know.”
“Do you still want to kill me?”
“Heh…” You chuckled and raised your head to lock eyes with him. “Who knows. Perhaps when we’re done with this mission and you’re no longer useful to me I’ll find out.”
Lies.
You knew very well that you didn’t want to kill him anymore. But you had too much pride to admit it to his face. You wanted him to doubt you, fear your next move even if he was much stronger than you and could easily defend himself against you.
You looked at him, hoping to see even the slightest bit of fear on his face, but all you were met with was a smile. You furrowed at the sight, wondering what was wrong with him and if losing his mind was a symptom of his term ending soon, but he spoke again, cutting your questioning short.
“I wouldn’t mind dying to your hands, but I don’t deserve it. It’s too peaceful.”
Perhaps he had lost his mind, yes.
“Who said I was going to make it peaceful?”
“Your presence alone would make it peaceful.”
You chuckled at his words despite not finding the conversation even remotely funny. You couldn’t tell if this was a subtle manipulation technique to stop you from thinking of murdering him or if he was being genuine with his feelings for once. Feeling overwhelmed, your knees buckled under your weight and you ended up sitting in the cold grass, still leaning against the tree.
Reiner took a few steps toward you to position himself in front of you before crouching to be on somewhat equal height.
“If I were you, I’d go back to where I was. No one can see us behind this tree and I wouldn’t want them to think we ran away or got kidnapped.” You spoke.
“It’s okay. If they call us, I’ll say we’re here. I just really want to… see you.”
You sighed, feeling defeated and not having the energy to reply back with something that will create more distance between the two of you. You were tired from today and the days before and… as much as you hated to admit it, you did find some sort of comfort in his presence and his body being so close to you.
It reminded you of simpler times, back when you were cadets, and your biggest worry was to not give Keith a reason to scream at you or find a way to sneak out of the dorms to be with Reiner alone for a few hours just to sacrifice some sleep and speak about anything and everything. You would do anything to go back to these times but alas you knew it was impossible and all you could do was relish in the bittersweet feeling of nostalgia that his mere presence brought to you.
Oh you wished you could hate him the same way you did when you found out his secret. But after everything that happened and the mountain of corpses you stood upon, it was impossible for you to hate him or not understand him to some extent. The thought of that night back in Liberio was enough to make your eyes wet.
You bit the skin of your lip anxiously before looking up to him. He noticed your teary eyes and a worried expression grew on his face.
“Reiner, do you feel the same way as I do?”
“What do you mean?”
“When I think of the people I killed back in Liberio, the civilians, the children… I want to throw up. The guilt eats me alive. To have done this to protect the so called hope of humanity who is about to wipe us all out… it feels like a waste of innocent lives.”  
Reiner looked at you with a shocked look on his face and almost instinctively, his hand went to grab yours. The sudden contact made your heart skip a beat as it was the first time in years that you felt his skin against yours. He gently squeezed your hand inside of his own and looked at you in the eyes, a serious look now harboring his face.
“I know how you feel.” Was all that he said.
And this simple sentence once again confirmed the doubts you carried with you all those years. There was more to it. Reiner was the armored titan and killed countless of innocent people but…
“You were just a kid.” You replied.
Back then, you hated Reiner not only because he had betrayed your trust, but also because you did not understand his stance nor ever imagined that you would have to walk in his shoes even once. You never considered that his crimes had been orchestrated by someone else and he had been forced to do all of this. Because killing innocents, no matter the reason, was inhumane and you could never do it.
Until you were forced to not so long ago in Reiner’s homeland. Killing innocents for a “greater cause” was awful until you were the one slaughtering innocents to protect the owner of the founding titan, Paradis’ devil, Eren Yeager. Now you understood, and you felt sorry.
Tears started to form in your eyes as images flashed inside of your head again. You looked away, embarrassed to cry in front of the very man you threatened to kill 5 minutes ago but you felt no judgment coming from him which made you feel thankful. With his thumb, he rubbed small circles at the back of your hand.
“Back when I was a soldier in Paradis,” Reiner spoke, catching your attention. “I sometimes wished I had never met you.”
“Huh…?”
“Because I knew revealing the truth to you would be the most painful part, and I was right. It was.”
You remembered of how your eyes locked as he was transforming, how for a quick second the world ceased to exist as all you could read on his face was…
“I’m sorry.”
Like he’d been reading you mind, Reiner interrupted your thoughts to say exactly what you were thinking.
“I’m sorry.” He repeated. “If I knew back when I was a kid that going on this mission would make us meet, I would’ve refused. I grew up hearing that the people of your island are devils.” He marked a pause and chuckled. “I seriously wished you were a devil, so that leaving you would have been easier.”
You remained quiet, letting the memories of that day flash in your head again. It had been so long, yet they were as clear as ever. Reiner’s hand timidly moved from your hand to your face that he cupped gently. You glanced up at him, finding his shy expression quite adorable.
“I’ll tell you… you’re the furthest thing I know from a devil.”
A single tear rolled down your cheek and before you could even notice it, Reiner gently wiped it away with his thumb before starting to caress your skin. You leaned into his touch, allowing it to ease you even for just a few seconds. It was almost embarrassing how he could make you forget about the mountain of responsibilities that laid upon your shoulders, just by showing you some love.
“Do you remember when I said I would marry you?” He asked, making you chuckle.
“Vaguely. You seemed pretty serious about it too… too serious for someone who was supposedly joking.”
“Ahah… well I wasn’t joking. Though I knew it would be impossible, I still said it as a promise to myself but disguised it as a joke to you.” He marked a pause. “It’s stupid to think of old promises and have hope in such a situation but…”
“Do you want to marry me, Reiner?” You cut him off.
A long silence installed itself between the two of you, as he slowly stopped caressing the skin of your cheek. You tilted your head to the side to observe his expression. He was completely out of it, his eyes glued to the ground. You almost regretted asking this question but once again, you knew you didn’t have much left and you were more than ready to hear this man’s each and every secret.
Especially those regarding the feelings that he seemed to have hidden from you.
You couldn’t help but let out a sarcastic chuckle escape your lips. You almost felt bad for having such a childish conversation while the world was dying, it seemed Reiner was thinking the same thing and it was probably why he was staying silent. You sighed, giving up on the idea of heartfelt last confessions.
You gently grabbed his hand and removed it from your face before getting up on your feet.
“Sorry, that was a stupid thing to ask.”
“No it’s not that-“ He got up as well, towering over you. “I… I want to marry you!” He almost shouted.
So he did love you.
You looked at him with a shocked expression then glanced away, feeling bad to have sort of forced this out of him.
“Do you think we deserve this happiness?�� You asked, looking in the distance.
“I don’t know.”
Your eyes wandered back to him, noticing a slight blush on his cheeks which made you smile fondly. You couldn’t believe this man was the armored titan. Yet he was, in all its glory. You imagined him in a suit of some sort, pronouncing his vows and everything else that a marriage ceremony included. It sure sounded nice.
But Reiner was a titan shifter with less than 5 years left, and colossal titans were destroying the world around you.
“Do we have time to reach this happiness?” You asked again, locking eyes with him, your next answers depending on what he’d say.
He paused for a while, looking for an answer, then he cleared his throat.
“Yes.”
Oh.
You closed your eyes, fully relishing in his reply and taking it as a marriage proposal. As happy as you felt deep within, you couldn’t help but also feel bitter over the wasted time, the wasted years, hating that if it weren’t for this world’s cruel ways and the sins that some pricks committed thousands of years ago, the two of you could’ve been happy.
This was all but unnecessary pain.
“Then make me a promise, Reiner.” You opened your eyes and took a step toward him before grabbing his hand.
“Yes…?”
“Stay alive.” You said, bluntly. “When all of this is over, I’ll marry you.”
Before you could say anything else, Reiner’s big hands grabbed your face before pulling you closer and gently pressing his lips on yours. You felt the corner of your lips form a smile as you responded to his kiss and wrapped your arms around him to pull him closer as his hands moved from your face to your hips.
The kiss was soft and gentle, just like how you’d imagine your first kiss with him to be. Although you could tell from the way his hands firmly squeezed your hips that he wanted to be more passionate, he was eager and desperate for your touch. He needed you so badly. 
When you parted, you were out of breath, bearing your eyes into his. You were surprised that he looked as nervous as you did, although he tried very hard to hide it.  
“I’ll stay alive.” He finally said. “If you promise me that you will too.”
“Mhm. I’ll try.”
You stayed in this position for a few seconds, just resting in each other’s arms, contemplating what would come next. The both of you were lost in thoughts, relishing in the comforting feeling of being in each other’s arms, knowing very well that it was just temporary comfort.
Soon enough, you heard Jean and Connie shouting your names from the distance which brought you back to reality. You quickly let go of Reiner’s embrace as he took a few steps back to not look suspiciously close if someone was to come now.
You walked back to where you were previously standing and waved at your friends who had thankfully not moved yet. You looked over your shoulder and shot a quick glance at Reiner who stood behind you with his arms now crossed on his chest.
“We should go back before they start asking us too many questions.”
“Right.”
The both of you walked back to where your friends were but before you could reach them, Reiner broke the silence again to speak.
“So… I take it that you don’t want to kill me anymore?”
You glanced at him, almost swearing for a quick second that cadet Reiner had taken control of his body just to speak right now. And when you noticed the little grin on his face you couldn’t help but rolling your eyes, feeling embarrassed when remembering all the emotions you went through in the span of just a few minutes.
“Shut up Braun.” Was all you could reply which earned you a chuckle from Reiner.
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reggieslocket · 2 years
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prepare yourselves because i'm going to give you a bunch of reasons and hints that will show you the high chance of eddie being actually gay and him and steve becoming a thing >:)
1. "freak" as a queercoded word
let's start with the scene where dustin, robin, steve and max find eddie in the house where he was hiding and particularly on the dialogue between the five of them
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there's this scene where eddie says something about how the people in town are getting ready to hunt him because they think he's guilty and he says "hunt the freak right?" and we see robin giving him an almost sad but understating look before replying "exactly" and i find it curios that they made her respond that out of everyone, i feel like it could be because she kind of relates to eddie's situation? she also would probably be considered a freak by people if they knew about her sexuality and that's why i believe the word has a queercoded meaning, if you think about it, "freak" was already used in the past seasons when bullies made fun of will, who also happens to be a queercoded character (even though we know he's coming out this season)
2. the handkerchief code
the handkerchief code gained popularity in the 70s and later on in the 80s and it was used especially by gay men to let others know their sexual preferences and fetishes. there were different and specific meanings depending on the color of your handkerchief and where you decided to put it (left pocket or right pocket)
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now if you watch closely eddie can be seen wearing a black hanky in his left pocket throughout the seven episodes and of course these little details have their own meaning, in fact the black one was used to indicate S&M (sadomasochism) and as mentioned before the fact that it is placed in his left pocket isn't casual because that placement indicated that the person wearing it was a top (the dominant one in bed) while if you put it in your right pocket it meant you were a bottom (the submissive one)
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this whole hanky thing made quite sense for me except for the fact that it was hard to believe that eddie is into sadomasochism but then rewatching the show a few days ago i noticed some handcuffs in his room and i found it weird because honestly what is a 20 year old man doing with those? he's not a cop or anything and so the fact that they are in his room is a bit strange for me... i just hope that the choice of making eddie wear the handkerchief isn't casual but a powerful move by the duffer brothers in order to hint at his sexuality
3. joe and joseph's interview
this interview really do be getting my hopes up. basically the interviewer asks joe what season one steve would think of his season four self and he replies with "surprised, approving... approval" WHILE looking and smiling at joseph who is also grinning, like there's no way they aren't hiding something and i hope it's the relationship between steve and eddie and steve's bisexuality. plus the fact that even maya is smiling while it seems like natalia is the only one able to be subtle about the whole thing lmao
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then obviously there are steddie-antis saying that he would be approving of him and nancy getting back together but like... what should he be approving of? they were already a couple in season one so it wouldn't make much sense
4. gaten ships them as well
remember: if gaten ships it then it's canon
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i love how the first couple that came to his mind is steddie and how proudly he says their names. he seemed so serious while saying it that it made me reflect on the fact that it's not that impossible seeing it happen and if not in season 4 maybe in season 5 since i read somewhere that luckily neither steve nor eddie are going to die in the last two episodes of this season (i don't know if it's true but let's hope so)
5. the chrissy-eddie thing
almost everyone who hates the fact that we headcanon eddie as gay will give the same explanation that he is clearly straight because he was flirting with chrissy and honestly i didn't see that as flirting at all, i just thought he was being really nice to her like he is to everyone. she was having a hard time and he was able to make her laugh and loosen up a little, i didn't find it as something romantic and furthermore who says that every interaction between a man a woman has to be romantic?
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like friendship exists as well people?? and don't try and say "tHeRe cAn'T bE sO mAnY qUeEr cHaRaCtErS iN oNe sHoW, iT's nOt rEaLiStIc" like trust me it's more realistic having a group of only (or almost) queer people than one where everyone is straight and i know the show takes place in the 80s but gay people existed even then but they just couldn't openly say it so stfu
6. steve's attempts to find a girlfriend
we all know mama steve is trying his hardest to find a girlfriend but none of them really "suists" him right? what if eddie is the person that suits him? i mean it would be epic if he spent two seasons trying to find a girlfriend and then he ends up with a dude lol, i'd like to see bi steve happening so bad and i just know that robin would be super supportive of him and my boy dustin would be the happiest person on earth if his two dads got together
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you can't tell me that they aren't developing a little crush on each other or that they don't care about each other, just look at eddie's face and his loving eyes in that scene and steve staring at eddie's lips for the whole time. i swear if they are really trying to get nancy and steve back together i'll start a riot because honestly they would be so forced, it wouldn't be good for both of their character development and also my boy jonathan doesn't deserve this, they made jancy dirty this season and i'm still pissed ugh
anyway if you read the whole thing ily and thanks for coming to my ted talk :)
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i984 · 1 year
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Your Love, My Religion
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|Pairing|: Wednesday Addams x gender neutral reader
|Warnings|: Ooc! Wednesday Addams, childhood best friend! Wednesday Addams, canon-divergence because there's no Tyler, it's Parent's Weekend but this detail is useless, Pugsley LOVES you, kissing but weird 'cuz you'll see, author is in their experimental phase.
|Summary|: It only takes half a semester away and a stupid (yet surprising) school event to get Wednesday quit being a coward.
|A/n|: This was requested by my wife @wol-fica and reposted because yesterday the tags hate me.
· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·
Bewitching.
You were that in so many ways.
And now, as Wednesday locks eyes with you from across the quad—past all the bustling crowd of students and parents of Nevermore Academy—she realizes the fact hasn't changed, not one bit.
Her foot took a step forward for her. Then another. And another. Before she knew it, she was already heading toward you—bumping and trampling past the people she couldn't care less for—her heart hammering wildly against her chest.
You've always had that effect on her.
When your parents brought you for a playdate years ago, Wednesday had locked you in one of the rooms of the Addams family mansion. But instead of crying or screaming for help, all she heard you do was mutter a small okay and bye-bye. 
And she was content to let you rot and die a slow death, but when she pressed her ear to the wood and heard your faint giggles, she had to open the door to see what had brought you glee amidst her kidnapping.
She found you—sitting with your legs crossed on the floor—petting Nero, her pet scorpion on your lap, with a fascinated look on your face.
Ever since that day, 5-year-old Wednesday Addams would invite you to playdates every week without fail with excuses like, "Nero loves your pets more than mine," or, "Nero wants you to come over."
Even after the scorpion's tragic death a year later, she allowed you to continue visiting her weekly. Your title had changed from 'playdate partner' to 'study partner' as soon as both of you went to the same elementary school, and you've been joined by the hips with the Addams girl ever since. 
The weekly visits grew into daily ones, and soon, Wednesday would spend nearly every waking hour of the day with you, filling her childhood with memories of endless thrilling adventures.
She'd never admit this to anyone, but she respects you for not judging her for who she is. Other people had called her a freak, a menace to society, and Wednesday couldn't care less about them, especially when you look at her with so much kindness and passion every time she talks about torture methods or unsolved murder cases. 
You were there when Pugsley was born, and Wednesday blames you for the tender personality his brother would later develop. In a way, you raised Pugsley just as much as she did, and it proved to earn you an unbreakable bond with the boy. 
And that's why as she gets close enough to you, she can see Pugsley standing on your side, holding your hand—a perfect mirror of the picture she had seen a thousand times growing up.
Her breathing quickens, and so do her steps; Wednesday was basically sprinting at you with butterflies in her stomach. But she didn't care because you met her halfway and embraced her with a ferocity that nearly matched hers. 
"I missed you so much," You whisper, and Wednesday swears to memorize the sweet sound. She hadn't realized how much she had missed hearing your voice until now.
"You came."
"Pugsley invited me for this Parent's Weekend thing," You mumbled into her shoulder before pulling back to look at her face properly, "I know it hasn't even been a semester since you moved, but I have to see you again."
Wednesday almost melts then and there at the intensity of your words and how you look at her with so much compassion and trust—like you knew she'd never hurt you or betray your devotion. 
And she wouldn't. Not when her lips are so close to yours, with your breath fanning her face, nose scrunched adorably. 
You look perfect, like the last time Wednesday was in the same position with you, the night before she had to leave for Jericho and this damned school that has cursed her entire being. 
Last time, she acted like the coward she was, turning her face away from your longing gaze, heart too weak to leave you if she'd kissed you goodbye. 
But now, as Fate has presented her a second chance, Wednesday grabbed your jaw and pressed her lips to yours. Unlike last time, her move was sure as she felt your soft silken lips on her chapped ones. And when you kissed her back—with the same tenderness that she finds in your eyes, words, and touch—warmth fills her pitch-black heart, luring her deeper into your spell.
She kisses you like a prayer—your lips the altar, your love her false God—and Wednesday now understands how man can sink so deep into their religions; to die for their Gods. 
Because she would die for you, kill for you, live for you, and unlike last time, she'd gladly sin over and over again, redeeming herself on the lips that perfectly match hers.
The bewitching you; her life was a living testament to that. And she'd never let you go.
· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·
Tag list is in the comments or else this post breaks.
|A/n2|: I am never posting this day of the week ever again. Also I forgot to say thank you to 700 of you! 🥲💖
Edit: NOW I FORGOT TO ADD TAGS TO MY POST HELP WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME-
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lousypotatoes · 14 days
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So Dark Up Above
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Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7
90 years ago...
It was now mid-June. Alastor had visited the flower shop every day since Mother's Day, buying different kinds of flowers each day.
Y/N was sweeping the floor when she heard the tiny bell ringing, signaling the arrival of a customer.
"I'll be with you in a second," she said, continuing to sweep, not looking up from the floor.
"Oh, take all the time you need, dear," said a voice. "I can wait."
At the sound of Alastor's voice, Y/N jumped and dropped the broom. This made Alastor laugh.
"Alastor!" she said sternly, picking up the broom. "Don't be scarin' me like that!"
"My apologies, Y/N" he said, still laughing. "I didn't mean to give you such a fright."
"Oh, is that why you didn't say anything when you came in?" she said, a doubtful look on her face.
Alastor didn't answer, instead looking at the different arrays of flowers. "Say, when did you get these Geraniums?"
"Oh," she said, putting money in the cash register. "I got them yesterday soon after you left."
"They're quite the lookers, aren't they?" he said softly.
"Oh, they are," she said, smiling. "Did you know that they hail from South America? They also come in a range of hues from white to lavender and-"
Listening to her rant about Geraniums of all things made something in Alastor's heart stir. Looking over at her, he found it adorable the way her eyes lit up and the way she talked with her hands. Alastor found himself staring and immediately blush started to creep up in his neck. He cleared his throat.
"Apologies for my rantin'," she said sheepishly. "I find the history of flowers rather captivatin', it's real easy for me to get carried away talkin' about them."
"There's no need to apologize, darling," Alastor chuckled. "In fact, I find it rather endearing."
"Oh, your words carry weight, Al," she said, picking up a vase of Geraniums to hide her blush.
"I'm glad you think so,"
It was silent for a few seconds.
"You plannin' on buyin' some flowers," Y/N said playfully said. "Or are you just gonne keep on smooth talkin' me?"
"Oh, right,"
"What do you even do with all the flowers you buy, hm?" she asked, as he picked out a bouquet of Narrowleaf Sunflowers. "That'll be two buck per stem, if you please."
"Sometimes, I present them to my mother," he said, handing Y/N the money. "Other times I adorn my studio with their beauty."
"I'm pleased you're makin' good use outta them," she said. "Y'know, you don't need to pop in here every day."
"I'm aware," he began. "But I enjoy our daily conversations, my dear."
Alastor saying that made butterflies appear in Y/N's stomach. "I do as well, Al," she said.
"I'm mighty curious, darling," he said, propping his elbow up on the counter. "What is your favorite flower?"
"Daisies," she answered immediately. "I know it's boring, but there's somethin' about them that I absolutely love .Why you askin'?"
"Just curious, dear,"
Alastor looked at his watch. "Good heavens, I need to rush if I'm to make it for my 2 o'clock broadcast," he said heading out the door with the bouquet of Narrowleaf Sunflowers. "Will you be phoning into the station tonight?"
"Don't I always?" she smiled, sad see to Alastor leave. "Have a splendid remainder of your day, Alastor."
"You as well, Y/N," he smiled back.
And with that the little bell above the door rang, signaling that he left.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Later that night...
"You only have yourself to blame, sweetheart," Y/N said, out of breath. "Had you not strayed from your vows, your husband wouldn't of hired me to kill you."
"Please," the woman sobbed, backed against the back alley wall. "Please don't do this! Just tell him-"
"I'm not tellin' him nothin'," she said, grabbing the woman's throat. "Why do you think I'm in this line of work? I like killin' people. The only reason I'm not doin' this for free is 'cause I also like the money."
"Please," the woman choked out. "Don't do this, I'll do anything."
"Broads like you really piss me off," she said, squeezing the woman's throat tighter. "What's the point of tyin' the knot if you're gonna sleep around with every Tom and Harry you lay your eyes on?"
The woman started thrashing and trying to pull Y/N's fingers off her throat, but she couldn't get out of Y/N's grip.
"Make sure you tell Satan I said hi, sweetheart." she grinned, placing her other hand on the woman's throat.
Suddenly, the woman lifted up her hand and scratched Y/N's cheek, drawing blood with her manicured nails.
Y/N yelped in pain, letting go of the woman with one of her hands. With Y/N distracted, the woman started thrashing a lot more.
BANG!
BANG!
BANG!
Y/N pulled out her gun from under her dress and shot the woman three times in the head.
The woman fell to the ground, blood oozing out of three different places on her face.
Y/N put the gun back under her dress, glaring daggers at the dead woman. She touched the scratch on her face and hissed in pain.
It stung, and it stung a lot.
After she put the body in a dumpster, she walked home as fast as she could, not wanting to draw attention to her cheek.
As soon as she got home, she rushed to the bathroom, putting rubbing alcohol on the scratch to clean it out, and finally putting a bandage it on it.
She sat on her couch, trying to relax. Honey tried to jump up on her lap, failing each time, making Y/N giggle.
After a few moments, she got up turned on the radio and walked over to the phone, dialing the radio station's number.
"You've reached Alastor Altruist!" said a voice that made Y/N smile giddily. "To whom do I have the pleasure speaking to on this lovely night?"
"You're gonna be gettin' tired of my voice, here soon, Al," she giggled.
"Ah, I had a feeling it was you calling," he laughed. "What tune do you fancy, dear?"
"It's been a spell since you've played Singin' In The Rain," she said. "I reckon I wanna listen to that."
"I was hoping you would request that tune," he said. "You'll be hearing it in a jiffy."
"I'm lookin' forward to it,"
"Have a lovely rest of your night, Y/N," he said into the phone. "You keep yourself outta trouble now."
"Trouble usually finds me," she giggled.
With that she hung up, sighing happily.
It had been a real long time since Y/N felt in love. She wanted to cherish every single moment of it and never let it go.
Just as she was about to get ready for bed, the phone rang again.
"This is Y/N, to whom am I speakin' to?" she said, picking up the phone.
"I could never get tired of your voice, dear," Alastor's voice came from the phone, making Y/N jump for the second time that day.
"Alastor!" she cried out. "I told you to stop scarin' me!"
"I apologize, Y/N," he said, laughing. "I didn't mean to give you such a fright.
"Yes you did, don't lie to me,"
"Alright, perhaps I did,"
"How'd you get my number?" she asked curiously.
"A friend of mine prints out the phone books," he said. "I was calling to see if you might wanna grab a drink with me tomorrow evening?"
Y/N had a loss for words. Since the two of them had met, she had imagined going out for drinks with him.
"Uh- yeah, of course," she stuttered. "What time?"
"I could pick you up at 8 o'clock, if that's alright with you?"
"Oh no, that's perfect,"
"Wonderful!" he exclaimed. "Could you give me your address?"
"Oh yeah," she said. "Write this down. It's 2734 Burgundy Street."
"Oh, that's not too far from me," he said "I look forward to see you tomorrow, Y/N." he said softly.
"Yeah, me too."
"Sleep well, my dear.
"You too, Alastor
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ughhh i absouletly love writing for characters in love, makes me feel all warm and fuzzy
i am so down bad for this man
stay safe and drink lots of water <33
xoxo, Izzy
Taglist 💋
@maksdust @trippoverrt @slytherin4ever @lucifers-silhouette @a-small-tyrant @leviwife1
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brooooswriting · 11 months
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For Sam maybe that Sam and R were dating before Sam left. Over the time that Sam was gonna R and Tara have gotten close (in a sister way) and hang out a lot so when R heard Tara got attacked she immediately rushed to the hospital and stayed there with her. Then Sam came with Richie. Maybe R could also be related to Sidney cuz I never really see Prescott R. And just scream 5 with some cute moments between Sam and R and at the end they kiss and Sam asks R to forgive her and that she still loves R
Five fucking years
Sam Carpenter x reader
Tara Carpenter x reader (platonic)
A/n: so this is a lot, but hey I hope you like it. And send requests for Jenna and her characters and Melissa and Sam or Vanessa
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“We will get through this” was probably the sentence you’ve said the most five years ago to 13 year old Tara.
Four years ago you it turned to “we will be okay”
It then turned into “we will be fine without her” and then “let’s never talk about her again” and while the last one didn’t quite work the rest did. After she left you, you and Tara fell into a deep hole. Miss Carpenter never said anything about it, never really grieved and wasn’t there for Tara as she had to go through all this pain. So you had to stay strong for the girl, over the time that you and Sam had a relationship you grew really fond of Tara and her friends. They were little idiots, uncoordinated, chaotic and loud but they were really nice. By now Tara referred to you as her sister, when people asked who you were she always answered “family” and you believe that it was her way to cope with the whole thing and due to the fact that you didn’t really have somebody except Sam back then, it did make you feel better too. So you also always said that she was family too.
You were on your way to meet Tara at their house when you got a call from her. “Y/n, he’s here” she cried into the phone making you flinch and adjust the volume. “Who’s here T?” You asked calmly hoping to calm her too, “ghostface. He wants to kill me, I think he’s inside” your heart stopped before your foot pressed down on the pedal until it touched the ground. “I’ll be there in 5, go lock yourself up somewhere. Did you already call the police?” The only answer you received was a scream and then the line went dead. You tried to call her back several times but she never picked up, so you called the police and drove even faster.
“Tara” you screamed as you went inside, even tough the police told you to wait outside. “Tara where are you” you walked in the kitchen where you found ghost face standing over her pulling the bloody knife out of her body and turning towards you. “Get away from her motherfucker” you called out and tackled him to the ground. After a short wrestle he pushed you on to your back and climbed on top of you before stabbing you two times and slicing up your upper arm. As soon as you hears the police sirens he was gone. “Tara” you got out the best you could as you sat up to look after her, she still had a pulse making you relax just a tad as she was sobbing next you. “You’ll be okay, we will be fine” you mumbled as the police and the doctors came inside.
You always dreaded this day, and you had hoped that it would never come but after all you did live in woodsborrow and you were Sydney’s niece. And now? Now somebody you love got hurt because of you. You sat next to Tara’s bed, your wounds already patched up and theoretically you should have stayed in bed but you couldn’t leave the girl alone after what happened. “Hey, you’re alright” you mumbled to her as she woke up, your hand holding hers. “Are you okay?” She asked as she saw your arm, “I’m fine, he got some small hits but hey.” She grinned before her face turned completely serious “but for real, thank you. You acted like a real big sister today, you didn’t even think about leaving, you just saved me” your heart broke for the smaller girl. “Because you deserve it and a) I am your bigger sister and b) don’t think about her alright? She didn’t deserve you” you comforted her the best you could. “ and You took it like a damn champ” you joked as her friends came in, all of them immediately swarming her asking if she’s alright and what had happened. You talked for a while until the door opened again, your and Tara’s heart sinking when you saw who stepped inside.
“Tara, are you alright?” She immediately asked and went to her bed. She wanted to take her hand but then saw that it was already taken and that was the time she noticed you, her eyes falling to your arm and then the bandages on your stomach, “are you al…” she started but you shook your head. “Don’t” was the only thing you said, Tara squeezing your hand in a comforting manner. Sam greeted all of Tara’s friends before turning to the man behind her, you only get noticed. “This is Richie, my boyfriend” your heart broke a second time that day, “I gotta go. I’ll be close thou. Call me if you need anything” you mumbled to Tara who nodded, “Tara’s tired, we should all go” Amber said, all of them were nodding and leaving the room, “not you Sam” Tara said.
———————————————————————————
“I was so scared” she cried out while Sam carefully stroked her cheek, “and when he attacked y/n, it got even worse” Sam frowned and kissed her sisters forehead, helping her calm down.
Later they fell asleep while Richie sat on a chair in the corner, you checking on them every now and then, you couldn’t stand being in the same room as them.
“T, honey, I’ve gotta get checked up. I’ll come by afterwards again, alright?” You mumbled so you’d only wake her. “Yeah, thanks for staying even tough, you know, all of this” it made you chuckle, “obviously, you’re my sister” you grinned and placed a kiss on her forehead before leaving.
———————————————————————————
“Get the fuck out” you could hear Tara’s voice emerge from the room, causing you to throw the door open and step in. “You should go Sam” your voice was cold making her freeze, “y/n” she started but you shook your head. “Leave the girl alone, you’ve done it for the last five years so continue for a while” you brushed past her, sitting on Tara’s bed and wrapping her up in your arms. The older carpenter sighed and went outside. She pulled you outside, “I gotta do something, so you gotta look after Tara. Don’t let her out of your sight and make sure she” you laughter interrupted her, giving you the option to speak up. “Do you really wanna tell me how to look after T? It’s what I’ve been doing the last 5 fucking years Sam and we got through life just great, so why don’t you take your boy toy and go back to where ever the hell you came from?” Your voice was harsh and you could see her flinch, you used to be very chill, never really aggressive and always looking for solutions. “Y/n” she started again but you only shook your head, “I thought you said you had to do something” you turned and walked back to Tara’s room.
“What did she say honey?” You asked as you sat on her bed, hugging her to your chest. “She… she’s billy loomis daughter, that’s the reason she left. My mom had an affair and now after 5 years she’s putting all of this on me” a grumble left your lips, your anger bottled up inside you to give Tara the comfort she needed. “I’m very sorry to hear that” she hugged you closer, soaking up the comfort and warmth you had to give. “How are you feeling with Sam being back?” She asked into your chest which suddenly started to hurt, “I’m fine” was the only thing you said making her giggle. “I’m not 13 anymore, be honest. I know that you can’t feel fine” it was crazy how mature she got, “I don’t feel fine, it’s crazy. She left, she didn’t even break up with me, she ghosted me and now she’s coming here with this dude and she’s acting like you three are family” you sighed, blinking the tears away. “You’re my family” was the only thing Tara mumbled before falling asleep.
After some time you decided to wander around the hospital for a bit, your legs were sore from sitting and you were bored. You’ve been gone for about 15 minutes when you got a text from Mindy
“There’s a whole lot of police around Wes house”
And then the lights suddenly turned off. Without a second thought you sprinted towards Tara’s room to find her gone. Then a sudden scream leading you the way. “Oh, you” you grumbled when you saw Sams boyfriend in front of the younger carpenter. “Yeah, Sam called me to look after Tara” he explained still holding where Tara hit him, “I’m capable of doing that myself” you said checking the corridors for a masked killer. “Oh really? Why weren’t you with her then?” You were about to open your mouth when the brunette spoke up, “don’t you dare” it was directed towards him, he held up his hands and backed away.
He walked a bit behind which was why you didn’t immediately notice him being thrown to the ground and knocked out, you only noticed when you were being pulled away from the wheelchair. “Run” is the only thing you got out before your back made harsh contact with the ground, knocking the air out of your longs. He was quickly on top of you stabbing you again before standing up and walking towards Tara. You could hear her whimper and sob, you could hear Richies heavy breathing and you could hear your heartbeat in your ears. Then you heard him talk, “come on Sam, choose. Tara or Richie, I mean poor y/n is already out isn’t she? You left the poor girl behind like she was nothing and that’s what she’s always been to you” you tried to somehow get to Tara but there was no way you could stop him, he’d only get angrier.
The ding from the elevator was like being saved by the gong. The ding was quickly followed by gunshots and a thud, ghostface laying on the ground. Sam immediately went for Tara while Dewy came for you, “get him” you mumbled your heart pointing towards the man but Dewy hesitated and looked towards Sam. You were his best friends niece, you kinda were family and leaving you behind wasn’t that easy for him. Sam nodded, “take Richie with you” and even tough you just said the same thing it hurt a lot more when she said it. “No, NO! I’m not leaving without her. Don’t. Take y/n” Tara screamed with every bit she still had but you only shook your head. “I’ll be fine. It’s what I told you the last five years, isn’t it?” You smiled and watched them each carry them to the elevator, your eyes slowly closing.
You could hear the elevator door open again and somebody stepping out, you opened your eyes a bit to see Dewy in front of the masked killer, his gun held up to its head. You noticed ghostface getting the upper hand and getting ahold of the gun. You didn’t know where the sudden energy came from but you jumped up and tackled dewy into the elevator catching the bullet that was meant for him. “Fuck” you mumbled out as the bullet went through your arm and the doors closed. Tara let out a relieved sigh while dewy started to lecture you.
Your wound were being tamed in the lower parts of the hospital while the police searched upstairs. Even tough you were short you were allowed to go before Tara. “We gotta talk” you said as you entered her room, the nurse leaving you to talk. “They are gonna take you away, and I can’t do anything. Richie is threatening with a lawyer and I legally don’t have any say in the matter where you go or don’t go” you explained to her, tears streaming down your face and now, hers too. “What? You can’t leave me with them” she cried out causing you to hug her. “I’m not, you’ll go with them and once I figure out who this asshole is and once he’s done, I’ll come get you. Unless you’re happy there, it’s okay if you wanna stay with them then” you said and kissed her forehead a couple of times. “Promise you will come and get me?” You smiled and held out your pinky, “I pinky promise that I won’t leave you like she did. Ever” you kissed her head again before parting. “Where are you going now?” She asked making you chuckle, “Amber is having a party and I’m in desperate need of alcohol. I have a lot to process and if I don’t leave I won’t let them go without you” you chuckled with tears in your eyes. You’d get her back but it still hurt to let her go. “Then don’t let them take me” you sighed, “I can’t stop them, but I’ll come get you. 5 days maximum alright? I’ll come and get you and then we will get Mindy, Chad, liv and Amber and we will leave. Go wherever you want, meet Sydney in her cabin or move to Alaska. Wherever you wanna go” she smiled, “I wanna move to New York” she said with a small nod. “New York it is” you said your goodbye before leaving her room, walking into the lobby, where Sam, Richie, Gale and Sidney were talking. “Syd” you called out running up to hug her, “y/n. God are you okay?” She asked as she held you tight when you parted Gale immediately hugged you. “Thanks for saving Dewy, even though he didn’t chose to save you” she mumbled into your ear causing you to pull back, “he chose me, somebody else just didn’t” you explained with a shrug. “Well, we were just getting to know Sam carpenter” your aunt explained, “don’t get used to her, she’s very quick when it comes to leaving” you told her, looking shortly at Sam who was rolling her eyes. “That was uncalled for” was her response but you only shrugged, “I guess it depends who you ask” you hugged Gale And syd goodbye. “Where are you going?” Sam asked making you laugh, “your neither my girlfriend nor my mom so non of your business” you said and walked out leaving the four of them behind. It was the moment where Sidney connected all the dots, that Sam was your ex girlfriend who ghosted you, Richie her new boyfriend and that you were pissed. As she was about to say something a nurse came up to them, “Miss Carpenter, we need you upstairs” Sam nodded and followed while Richie excused himself to get the car.
The older woman signed some things before walking into her sisters room where she sat on a chair next to her. “Can I ask you something?” Tara nodded a bit hesitant, “how did you guys do the last 5 years? I know that’s a stupid question but I need to know” It was silent for a moment. “I was 13 Sam, without a dad and with a mom who was always working, who didn’t care about her child. So y/n took care of me, she became my family, pulled me out of my depression. I just wish I would have been old enough to take care of her too, but I wasn’t. So Sara did it” she answered, her voice cracking while talking. “Sara?” Tara sighed, “your friend? Or better said ex friend. She took care of y/n, still does” Sams eyebrows furrowed. “Did they…? Are they? She’s always been flirting with y/n even when we were together” a shrug followed the question. “She doesn’t like to talk about it, so we don’t. Just like we don’t talk about you”
After some silence Tara was brought into the car while Gale and Sidney wanted to talk to Sam. “I’m not gonna play bait. I’m gonna get my sister and my boyfriend to safety. It’s my job” Sydney laughed at her. “Really? Wasn’t it your job to keep them safe 5 years ago too?” “Syd” Gale interrupted her but she shook her head, “because if I remember it right you left them. You left your sister and girlfriend without a word. You sent them through hell. Don’t think that this is gonna erase everything” Sam scoffed before walking to the car.
“Sam, I need my inhaler. I don’t know where it is. I only have one at ambers house” Tara said, causing a argument to break out. “Fine, what’s the address?” Richie said when they finally decided to drive to Amber.
You were at the party, you were taking shots with Chad in honor of Wes, you watched him fuck up with Liv, you smoked weed with Mindy and finally met Sara on the couch in the living room where you sat on her lap, rambling about whatever in your drunk and high state. “Everybody out! The party is over” someone screamed and turned on the lights, the voice making you freeze, Richie. “Party is over. Get out” sams voice came from behind you cashing you to sigh as Sara tapped your thigh, signaling you to stand up. “Want me to drive you home?” She asked as you stood in front of the older carpenter, her hand on your waist. “No, Im going home with Mindy and Chad. Wanna make sure they get home safe” you mumbled to her, she nodded and kissed the corner of your lips before rounding the couch. “Samantha” her cold voice said, “Sara” was mumbled in response. As soon as she was out of earshot she turned to you, “really? Her? Real mature” you shook your head and walked away, trying to find Chad.
You walked around the house for a bit but no sign from the boy, so you returned to the living room where you found Sam hovering over a bloody Mindy. “What the fuck Sam” you yelled, pushing her away from the younger girl to press onto the wounds. “It’s you isn’t it? Is this why you are back?” Your heart hurt when you thought about the possibility that it was her, but after all she was gone for 5 years and now suddenly reappears. “Come on y/n, you know me. You know that I wouldn’t hurt you or Tara” she tried to calm you, taking her focus of Mindy. “Really? Because if I remember right you did hurt us 5 years ago and I don’t believe that I know you anymore” before she could say anything Tara and Amber and Richie came from another room. “Mindy” Amber called out, pushing Tara behind her in a protective manner, “Tara and I were together the rest of you was on your own” after some more bickering about who the killer might be Liv entered the room, covered in blood. ���Why are you covered in blood? Are you alright?” You asked her, still crouching next to Mindy. “I-I found-Chad he-he’s” Sam gasped, while Richie spoke up “it you. You’re the killer” Liv started to curse at all of you while Amber tried to calm her down, “I’m not the fucking killer” she cursed out and suddenly Amber laughed out, “I know. Welcome to act three” she pulled out a gun and shot Liv causing you to gasp in surprise.
She then pointed the gun towards you, Sam and Richie. Without a second thought you grabbed Sams hand and pulled her into the kitchen where you started to look for knives. The moment you got one somebody grabbed you and pulled you down the stairs to the basement. “What are you doing? We gotta get Tara” you cursed the couple out as you reached the bottom of the stairs, “how well do we really know Tara? Come on Sam you’ve been gone for a while and there are always two killers. She’s her best friend” you shook your head with a small laugh, in that moment you had to refrain yourself from becoming a killer. “Do whatever you want. I’m gonna go safe my sister” Sam looked at you walk away, “I’m gonna go too. You can stay here” she told him and followed you, quickly grabbing a knife too. “Oh, look who decided to join” you didn’t even look at her as you made fun of her, “I’m sorry for what happened Y/n” you rolled your eyes as you kept wandering around the house. “Let’s not do this, you go whatever you wanna do and then fuck off again. I’m gonna go look for Tara” you were about to part from her when she grabbed your wrist, “we are not splitting up, that would be stupid. We are both gonna look for her, together” you just nodded. You could have argued but it wouldn’t lead to anything and you’d only take longer to find the girl.
While you were looking for Tara you could hear a gunshot and some screaming. You opened a closet door where you found her tied down, “T” you mumbled moving to untie her feet while Sam untied her hands and pulled the tape off her mouth. “You stay hidden” you told her with a strict voice leaving no room for discussion. “You do too” Sam told you causing you to shake your head, “no, definitely not” it was a back and forth until you finally agreed that Sam would go outside and you’d wait to use the moment of surprise. “Be cautious when it comes to Richie, something’s wrong with him” you told her causing her to roll her eyes. “Real mature” was only mumbled in response before she exited the room just to see Richie and Sidney being thrown over railing.
It turned out that Richie was in fact the killer, together with Amber they captured Sidney, Gale and Sam in the kitchen as Amber went to look for Tara and you. “She’s gone” you could hear Ambers voice, you figured that she was talking about Tara but it meant that Richie was now downstairs alone. You gave the brunette a sign, which made her pick up the phone and call him.
“So what’s your favorite scary movie” the typical ghost face voice came out of the speaker confusing Richie. “You think this is funny? I’m gonna slice you open” he was distracted enough for you to act. You grabbed a saucepan and hit him on the back of the head knocking him out shortly.
By now Amber was back downstairs, Sid and Gale overpowering her. Setting her on fire and stabbing her. Richie was back to consciousness fighting with Sam. You were putting pressure on Gales wound when you heard Richie talk, “god Sam, you’re so stupid. You let me convince you that your sister and y/n were the killers and you were so heartbroken over this loser that it was way to easy to fuck you. That’s all I had to do because you would have taken anyone just to get over lovergirl anyway” you were about to move and help her when you saw her stab him through the jaw. She then flipped him over and kept stabbing him around 22 times. “Nobody messes with my family” she said as she stood up, shooting him in the head after Sidney walked to her. “You always gotta shoot them in the head” she explains. You all walked towards them, happy that it was over. You stood next to her, her pinky reaching out to wrap around yours causing you to blush. A scream came from your right, but was quickly stopped when a gun shot followed. Tara stood with her crutches, “you were a shitty friend” you both immediately ran towards her, engulfing her into a hug. “I’m never letting you go” you laughed into her hair causing her to laugh too.
Twenty minutes later you sat between Sidney and Gale wrapped in a blanket. “Can I talk to you?” Sam asked as she crouched down in front of you, you really really wanted to say no but you just couldn’t bring yourself to say it, so you nodded and stood up following her behind the ambulance. “I know you probably don’t wanna hear it but just this once let me explain and if you don’t wanna see me after that then I’ll never look for you again and I’ll leave Tara with you” it caused you to nod hoping that you’d be able to forgive her, you missed her. “After I found out who my dad is I went feral and I know that you know that, you were there for me through it all and looking back I regret not just talking to you but back then I was just mad at my mum and the world and when I realized how much I hurt you I decided that it’d be better not to ask you to come with me. I left without you hoping that you’d get over me and I thought that it wouldn’t be too hard for you to let me go. But I never thought about how much you do actually loved me. And I also couldnt let go of you, you were always on my mind. You’re still my lock screen and while Richie said a lot of shit today he was right about one thing, I could never let you go. No matter how hard I tried. And I guess what I’m trying to say is that I still love you and I want you back, I’ll do whatever you want to make it up to you. I want a Family, I want you me and Tara to move away, hell, let’s take Chad and Mindy with us and get away from all the things that happened here, please” she was rambling and begging by now, tears flooding her eyes. It was cute and 100% genuine. “Tara wants to move to New York” was the only thing you said before throwing yourself into her arms and kissing her. The people around you were applauding and awe-Ing making you break away to hide your blush in her neck. “Let’s go with Tara” she wrapped her arm around your waist and pulled you into the ambulance with Tara. Your hand stroking her head while sams held her hand. “So New York?” Tara asked as the ambulance door closed, causing all three of you to laugh.
You finally got your family together.
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blouisparadise · 1 month
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Today we have the fourth part of our hurt/comfort rec list for you! There are tons of amazing fics on this list that we hope you'll show some love to. If you missed the previous parts, you can find part one here, part two here, and part three here. If you enjoy our rec lists, please be sure to like and reblog this post to help spread the word. Happy reading!
1) Wanna Feel the Edges Start to Burn | Explicit | 6,111 words
Harry gives him a gentle smile. “Feeling a little bit better?” Louis nods tentatively. “I think so yeah. Thank you so much for being so kind, but you really didn’t need to do this.” He lifts his unfortunately still shaky hand and runs it haphazardly through his hair. “It was just a spilled tea, I totally overreacted. I’m a bit embarrassed to be honest.” Harry scoffs. “Are you kidding me? Don’t be. I saw the whole thing, that guy was way out of line. You didn’t do anything wrong.” Louis gives him what he’s sure is a watery smile. “Erm thank you. I wouldn’t normally admit this to a stranger, but you’ve already seen me cry today so what the hell?” He forces himself to let out a weak laugh. “The thing is, my period is due any day now and sometimes the birth control pills make my emotions go a little haywire. I think that’s what happened.”
2) To Love Without Reason | Explicit | 8,894 words
“Come on in, soldier,” Louis pats Harry’s chest and walks away, leaving Harry to follow behind. Harry stands in the living room, looking around at Louis’ dwelling. Family pictures placed high on a shelf, certificates of Louis’ practice, and other trinkets that make Harry entirely too nostalgic. “I have to warn you,” Louis says as he puts the kettle on, the water droplets from his hair trickling down the golden skin of his back. “The door jams if you lock it so you'll have to leave it ajar.” Harry acknowledges with a soft hum, too entranced by Louis’ glistening skin to form a coherent reply.
3) Wanna Do Nothing With You | Explicit | 9,606 words
The accident happens in the stupidest way possible. One minute Louis is demonstrating a skateboard trick he’d just learned for Lottie, the next he’s waking up in a hospital. He’s told that he wasn’t unconscious the entire ride, but he has absolutely no recollection of it. One second he’s fucking around in his own garden and the next he’s being assaulted with the strong sterile scent of a hospital. So. There’s that.
4) Let Me Be Your Good Night | Explicit | 10,520 words
Louis goes on a shit Valentines date and Harry's the cute waiter who takes him home
5) For The Love Of Biscuits | Mature | 16,574 words
Note: This fic is locked and can only be read by AO3 users.
The thing about hybrids is that their animal instincts make them jumpy. And quite often lends them to being owned. Harry Styles wasn't looking to purchase a half-breed. But sometimes things just happen. And owning a fox/human hybrid was something that happened.
6) Works Like A Charm | Explicit | 18,088 words
Ever since Louis joined the team in fifth year, a few facts have become set in stone. One: Louis is the best chaser in Hogwarts. Two: Harry is the best beater in Hogwarts. Three: They do not get along. So it’s really unfair of Liam to think that forcing them to spend time together as Louis recovers from his injury will make them the best of friends. The last thing Louis would do is get along with that git.
7) Soup Of The Day | Explicit | 19,958 words
It had been the single minded goal for them since college and seemed simple enough. 1. Study hard. 2. Open their dream restaurant. 3. Take the culinary world by storm. What could possibly go wrong?
8) Under The Rain Or Under The Snow | Explicit | 20,667 words
Christmas AU where they broke up a month ago but Harry shows up at Louis’ childhood home for the holidays. Louis didn’t tell his mum about their breakup so staying with them is not ideal. Harry stays.
9) Heart Eyes | Explicit | 21,467 words
Harry is a dedicated sentinel with a strong aversion to demons, and Louis is the lovesick incubus who will go to any lengths to win Harry's heart.
10) It Was All By Design (‘Cause I’m A Mastermind) | Explicit | 21,986 words
“You can’t be serious. You think I would be so awful to work for - you would rather quit?” “Don’t be all high and mighty about it,” Harry scoffs. “Surely you would do the same.” “I’m not being high and mighty. It’s called being professional.” “Really?” Harry pushes. “You’d work diligently under me with no complaints? You’d do whatever I asked of you?” “That would be my job, so yeah.” Harry shakes his head. “I’d work you so fucking hard,” he says slowly, “that you’d have to quit.”
11) Thrown To The Wolves | Explicit | 21,681 words
Louis is a human living in the Styles' wolf pack who can't stop getting into trouble, and Harry is the soon-to-be alpha who thinks keeping Louis at arm's length is the safest option.
12) Letters To June | Mature | 41,150 words
It's 1915, Europe is in the middle of the Great War. Omega Louis decides to join the Letter Home Project to become someone’s penfriend. Through this he meets a lovely soldier who hasn't got anyone else to send a letter to. Along with his letter, comes a picture of the most handsome alpha Louis has ever seen.
13) Catch Me If I Fall | Explicit | 47,099 words
Lovers when on the stage but bitter rivals as soon as they step off, Harry and Louis have butted heads from the moment they first met. Locked in a stalemate that they hope to ride out until graduation, things take a turn when Harry learns that Louis is hiding a secret.
14) As We Are | Explicit | 48,268 words
Louis doesn't think much when he's asked to meet up with the alpha of the pack two hours from his own - he figures it's business as usual. But Harry Styles is anything but usual.
15) Once Burnt, Twice Shy | Explicit | 52,644 words
Louis and Harry are polar opposites in every way. Where Louis is a bestselling author from the city, Harry is a small-town firefighter who’s never left his home. Where Louis is spontaneous and spirited, Harry is introverted and calm, never straying from routine. When an ill-fated accident and an exceptionally intelligent tabby bring them together, they are forced to confront their pasts and forge a better beginning for themselves. Will sparks fly, or will it all go up in flames?
16) Of Lost Things | Explicit | 57,890 words
Louis comes with a familiarity Harry has never felt with anyone else before. After their fateful meeting, their chemistry became undeniable, and soon after, Harry had felt like he hit the jackpot when it came to finding the person he would spend the rest of his life with. But all relationships come with their own unique problems, and Harry soon realizes that their relationship is no different. When their problems go from unordinary to nearly bizarre in nature, he takes it upon himself to find an answer to their troubles. What he stumbles upon are terrifying coincidences between his and Louis’ story, and the ill-fated mythological couple, Orpheus and Eury. But it’s all they are; just coincidences, ones that feel as frighteningly familiar as Louis. Except… what if none of this is a coincidence? What if everything Harry has always seen as fiction is true, and myth—or rather, history, is about to repeat itself?
17) Sink Into Your Sunlight | Explicit | 79,562 words
In the grand scheme of things Louis did believe in love, what he didn’t believe was that he would ever find it in his life time for himself. Low and behold he would find it with someone he didn’t anticipate, now it was just a matter of having it work out the way he dreamed of.
18) Invisible String | Explicit | 84,726 words
Louis swears on his life that that man came out of literal nowhere and he thanks each lucky star for having good breaks in his car. This strange alpha also happens to be the most beautiful being Louis has laid his eyes on. For some unknown reason, the omega feels safe around the alpha. It might seem strange, but you can't always explain why or how things are the way they are. All you can really be sure of is that they happen for a reason. There's a higher power (call it what you want) that knows better and definitely knows more than you do.
19) Wind Beneath My Wings | Explicit | 93,131 words
As an omega carer that works at a rescue and rehabilitation centre for feral alphas and omegas, Louis has experienced all sides of ferality. So Harry- a cold, near mute, non-receptive alpha- was a challenging case for everyone at Phoenix Rehab Centre. Louis wasn’t expecting to feel drawn towards an aloof Harry, or to form a slow bond with him. He certainly was not expecting for his entire life to change in unforeseen ways.
20) You Were My Because | Explicit | 109,089 words
Note: Please be sure to read the tags and any warnings.
Louis has battled the demons of his past for years now and has little hope of finding happiness for himself. Especially now that a school reunion is taking place and the memories of his school days are suddenly coming back with full force. But after rain always comes sunshine, in Louis’ case in the form of his old schoolmate Harry. A story about healing, friendship, finding trust and love.
21) Drops of Jupiter | Mature | 121,826 words
In a small, sleepy town ruled by prejudice, Louis Tomlinson runs his grandmothers shop for the occult. He finds comfort in his tarot cards, his friends, and a dog that he doesn't have room for. He thought the worst he'd have to deal with would be bigotry, until a new sheriff arrives with a headstrong little girl that's impossible not to fall in love with. But what happens when a string of break-ins leads to a brutal attack, and the towns' darling is murdered right under their Sunday hats? A murder that just so happens to bear the same modus operandi as similar homicides in neighbouring states. Has the killer been circling Virginia, or is he a local of Lavender Hills? And what will Louis do when the charming Sheriff Styles starts to suspect him of such a heinous crime?
22) Sewn Into You | Explicit | 167,485 words | Sequel
Harry Styles thinks soulmates are a fairytale, or in other words-a lie. He has no interest in entertaining anything that has anything to do with the very name that had been etched along his collarbone since his eighteenth birthday. Louis Tomlinson won't be answering to another alpha for the rest of his life if he can help it. Fuck happy endings, his soul mate can choke on it. Problem is, Harry needs a personal assistant to save his family's business, Louis needs the cash to officially move off of his childhood best-friend's couch. They can manage. Surely, nothing will go wrong.
Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.
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hihello-pinky · 7 days
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Sight (5)
Suna Rintarou X F! Reader
Sometimes, it takes losing someone to finally see them. He wished he knew this before, but Rintaro had to learn this the hard way.
Genre: Angst, Romance, Hurt/Comfort
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction and in no way represents my views of the original anime/manga characters.
WARNINGS: nothing, just fluff, and OH, did not go through proofreading lols
Word Count: 1.6k
Surprise quick update! I know I said in the last part that things are about to get downhill starting from this chapter. However, I really enjoyed writing this one that I had to cut out the angst portion. So... this is also quite a short read. Happy reading, though!
Kindly reblog, like, and/or leave a comment if you loved this chapter and let me know what you think! xoxo
part one part two part three part four
kofi ~~
˚✧₊⁎⁎⁺˳✧༚ - - - ˚✧₊⁎⁎⁺˳✧༚
“I’m very happy, Y/N,” Dr. Hirai says in front of you as she examines the papers. “These results look good. You haven’t been stressed much lately?”
You beam at the woman. “I guess so. My headaches have rarely occurred as well.”
”Great.” She smiles as she picks up her pen and starts to write. “I’m going to prescribe you some vitamins and supplements. But remember, rest and sleep is top priority, okay?”
You respond with a nod, akin to a child receiving instructions from their parent on the first day of school.
As you wait for Dr. Hirai to finish writing the prescription, a knock comes on the door. After the doctor’s “Come in”, your husband’s head peeks inside.
”Hi, Doc.” He greets before looking at you. “Hey. Something came up at the company and I have to go there. Would you want to wait for me at the cafe across the street?”
Other times you would have felt disappointed about his need to leave, but the mere fact that he’s informing you - through a cute peek at the door nonetheless - makes your heart flutter instead.
“Okay, sure.”
Rin shoots you a smile that almost melts your heart. “Great. I’ll keep you posted.”
And just like that, the door closes again. You turn to Dr. Hirai to see her looking at you. “Anything’s the matter, Doc?”
The woman just smiles before handing you the prescription. “Oh, nothing, Y/N. Nothing.”
˚₊⁎⁎⁺˳༚ ˚₊⁎⁎⁺˳༚
You watch the busy street through the window, your hand tapping a pen against your journal. You’re not one to miss writing daily but these past several weeks, you have been too preoccupied to jot down your thoughts.
Then, there’s also the matter of an irrational fear.
Truth be told, you’ve been happy since that night Rintarou admitted his attraction to you; the night he asked you to give him a chance and for you two to get to know each other.
You’d love to pen down those memories but there’s a voice at the back of your head telling you that it’s a bad idea. That it’s a prelude to something terrible happening.
You place your pen on the table and flip through the older entries on your journal, only to remember the entries you are looking for are no longer in the notebook’s binder. You had them removed and placed in a box the day before you asked Rin for divorce, thinking that it's time to give up on trying to make things work for both of you.
But then, things have changed now.
Or have they really changed? That voice in your head asks in skepticism.
What if, just like before, this “peace” is a fluke? What if Rin ends up hurting you again?
You close your eyes tightly and rub at your temples. You shouldn’t be entertaining this kind of thoughts. Overthinking and worrying about things from five years ago…
”Hey, Y/N? Is that you?” A familiar voice brings you out of your thoughts and you open your eyes only to be met by a friendly smile.
”Oh,” you say in pleasant surprise, “Hi, Hajime. What an unexpected meeting.”
The older guy's smile widens as he gestures for the seat across you. You nod in reply, closing your journal and putting it at the side.
”What brings you here?”
”I had a check-up with my doctor at the hospital across the street. How about you?”
At your question, Hajime scratches his nape. You notice his ears redden and you try not to smile at how boyishly embarrassed he looks. “Um, I’m visiting someone.”
”A friend?”
He locks eyes with you and groans at the teasing look that you know is visible on your face. “Okay, okay. She’s not technically a friend. I… met her one night through an accident, my motorcycle bumped into her. Thankfully, her injuries are not serious.”
”Oh my god,” you cover your mouth in reflex. You compose yourself before continuing, “I’m assuming she’s okay, though?”
Hajime waves his hand in front of you. “No worries! She’s fine and getting better. In fact, she’s about to get discharged tomorrow.” He suddenly clicks his tongue. “Am I bad to feel sad about her being discharged? I won’t have a reason to see her anymore.”
This time, you’re not able to stop yourself from laughing. “Hajime, that’s silly! Why won’t you just ask her out? Or her family and friends, maybe? You probably have met some of them, right?”
He smiles sheepishly and it’s a contrast to his usual demeanor when in the playground with his son. “I’m nervous to ask. Also, her family’s not here. She very recently moved back to the country from living abroad several years before. She also mentioned she has yet to reconnect with any of her old friends.”
”Oh, I see. But isn’t that reason enough to ask her out, if you’re really interested in her?”
”I guess so…”
Seeing the flush on your friend’s face makes you smile. “Who would have thought you’d get yourself in a classic meet-cute scenario?”
”Ugh, Y/N, please stop teasing me.” You know he means to reprimand, but Hajime still joins you in your laughter.
˚₊⁎⁎⁺˳༚ ˚₊⁎⁎⁺˳༚
“Fuck.” Suna resists the urge to throw his phone after the screen died on him. The battery had been on the verge of dying and he couldn’t find his charger anywhere. So, he’s on the way to the cafe, hoping that you didn’t decide to go somewhere else.
As he approaches the entrance, it amazes him how he’s quick to spot you in a crowd now. He sees the baby pink dress you’re wearing, your cardigan looking soft and comfortable over it. He also notes that you had tied your hair into a bun, a few strands framing your face.
And then he notices you’re not alone. To his dismay, he recognizes the person you’re currently with. Before he knows it, Suna is already brisk-walking the short distance from the entrance to your table.
You notice his presence as you look up at him and smile. That very sweet and innocent smile instantly calms him down a notch. He takes a deep breath. “Hey. I wasn’t able to send you a message, my phone died on me.”
”That’s okay.” Then, gesturing to your companion, you ask, “Rin, you remember Hajime?”
Suna tries to sound as nonchalant as possible as he faces the man. “Yeah. What brings you here?”
Hajime gives him what he assumes to be a friendly smile and Suna reminds himself that there’s no acceptable reason why he should give in to the urge to punch the smile out of the man’s face. “I was gonna visit someone at the hospital.”
Before Suna can respond, the man quickly checks his watch as if suddenly remembering and curses under his breath. “Oh, shoot. Uh, I should go.” He gives a wave before going over to the counter to make his purchase.
Suna shakes his head, a small scoff leaving his mouth. “Rin,” you call his attention. “Let’s go?” He watches you zip your bag close and before you can put the strap on your shoulder, he swiftly grabs to carry it for you.
If he didn’t turn his back as soon as he does so, he wouldn’t have missed your blush and smile.
˚₊⁎⁎⁺˳༚ ˚₊⁎⁎⁺˳༚
Once you reach Rintarou’s car, he asks if you have your phone charger with you. As you say yes, he asks again if you would plug it in the car’s charging port as he maneuvers the car out of parking.
You do as he asks and, as you place his phone on the console, notice some things that spark your concern.
”Rin?”
”Yeah?” He responds, eyes ahead.
”I know we both have sweet tooth, but didn’t we agree not to give Risa and Ryuu too much candy?”
”Huh?”
”Lollipops and gums,” you answer, finally tearing your eyes away from the items that had caught your attention. You turn to Rin and watch as the confusion leaves his face.
To your surprise, he only chuckles in response. “Those aren’t for the kids, Y/N. They’re mine.”
Now, it’s your turn to feel lost. “Huh?”
Rintarou bites his lips. “I’m trying to quit smoking. I heard those are nice alternatives.”
”Oh.” You’re at a loss of words for a moment, remembering the many times you have told him in the past that smoking is bad for the health. As you struggle to find what to say, Rin continues.
”It’s gonna take a while though. To be honest, this isn’t the first time I’m trying and it’s really hard.” A small laugh. “I’ve been smoking even before I was legally allowed to. But god, I do hope I can finally quit this time.” He shoots you a quick smile. “I don’t want my wife to leave me because of nicotine problems.”
And just like that, whatever response you’ve been able to come up with in your mind gets forgotten, chased away by the butterflies in your stomach.
Rintarou has been doing this a lot lately: calling you his wife.
Of course he had done so in the past, but they were all said in mockery, with the intent to spite and hurt you. It’s the very opposite now. He knows he makes you flustered and you know he enjoys seeing you blush.
You turn your head to look out the window, hoping he can’t see your very red face. Behind you, he laughs a little. It does not help in calming the beating of your heart. “What’s the matter, Y/N?”
”Shut up, Rin!"
to be continued.
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wekiamo · 1 year
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fell harder pt 2
skeet ulrich x fem!reader
a/n: here goes part 2! this is a lil longer than my fics usually are, i hope thats not a problem! have fun reading 🤍 BTW SKEET IN THIS GIF BYEE that man is something else
pt. 3 & masterlist
warnings: swearing, fluff
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you didn’t get to sleep a lot at night. maybe it’s the anxiety you’re feeling, knowing that today you were going to meet almost everyone you were going to see very often from now on. it’s not a big deal for you, the only big deal is that in “everyone”, skeet ulrich is included.
you fear you’re gonna get nervous and say something weird, act weird making him dislike you. if that was anyone else, it would be okay. but imagine skeet ulrich disliking you? that’s what you think for almost 5 minutes after getting up from bed, while looking at yourself in the mirror.
you figure out you have to convince yourself that he’s a normal person just like you, and that there’s nothing to be scared about.
“yeah, it’s not a big deal. so what if he doesn’t like me?” you tell youself, before opening your fridge and grabbing an apple. you continue talking “i shouldn’t care about what he thinks of me. he’s a human like anyone else, so i’m gonna act like i always do. that’s it!” you sound more convinced than you thought you would be, and that makes a smile grow in your face.
you jump happily around the house, until you get to the couch and throw yourself on it. you turn on the TV and you start watching some kids show, too busy biting your apple to change the channel.
it’s silly, but you find yourself not wanting to change it, so you just keep watching it until you’re done with your apple. you turn off the TV, and start feeling sleepy.
you close your eyes slowly, and then you fall asleep.
“damn, that was the best nap i’ve took in such a long time” you say, before checking what time is it.
it’s 4 pm. you remember you didn’t ask dave what time you’re supposed to show up to dinner, then you make your way to your room to get your phone.
“Hey Y/n, meet us at 7. I can pick you up if you want to” 2:20 pm
“smart guy” you think “it’d be cool if he picked me up. meeting someone for the first time in their car would be a… would be definitely a new experience”
“hey, sorry for taking too long, i took a nap” 4:07 pm
“but yes! imma send you my address rq hold on” 4:07 pm
you send him your adress.
you’re hungry.
it’s time for Topanga’s Burgers - your favorite place in the world. well, not really but thats what you call it. actually, it’s just your favorite place to eat burgers. its really near your house and that makes you love it even more. you have befriended literally all the workers there. you love the fact they’re all kind and they really like what they’re doing, you really appreciate it. it makes you remember of how amazing would it be if you had a job you’d love doing. and your last job was definitely not something you loved doing, in fact, it was the complete opposite. you quit it not too long ago and you were living with your savings and your mom’s salary. she lives with you, but she’s on vacation now. anyways, Topanga’s Burgers definitely gives you motivation to keep working hard to get where you want.
you take a bath, put on some clothes you like, do your personal hygiene, and you leave your house.
“y/n!!” a worker greets you with a big smile on her face, leaving the cashier area to come and give you a hug.
“keisha! hey, how have you been?” you hug her back tightly, happy to see her again.
keisha is a 40 years old cheerful and awesome woman. she’s probably one of the most fun friends you have. she also gives you amazing advice about literally anything you ask her about. she’s the best
“i’ve been worried about you. it’s been 3 days you’re not even coming to greet us anymore!” she says, with a genuine look of worry in her eyes. that statement of hers make it pretty obvious you come here a lot.
“yes, and i’m sorry! but i got some pretty good news”
“save it just for a minute” she says, and turns around to call the rest of the workers to hear the news you have “guys, come here! y/n’s back with good news”
everyone in the burger shop starts looking, but you don’t really care. it doesn’t embarrass you anymore.
you greet everyone coming your way as they make a circle and adjust to it, to hear the news.
“come closer” you say, and they do.
“you know when i auditioned for scream 7, right? so… i did it”
“YOU GOT THE ROLE?” keisha screamed, as some other workers gasp.
“I DID” you reply with a big smile and a happy nod, as they start jumping and screaming in excitement as you do too.
“you’re not so useless, are you?” tom joked, and everyone laughed including you.
“but seriously now, who’s going to be working with you?” tom asked in a curious tone
“there’s someone special. really special”
“hurry and give us a hint” said angelica, a funny old woman who works as a cleaning lady.
“okay, okay, you’ll have to get it right. it’s this really hot middle-aged man who you all know i always had a crush on”
“no way. skeet ulrich? he’s going to be in scream 7 too?”
“yes ma’am!”
“guys, didn’t scream end in the third movie?” linda asked.
“shut up linda, let her speak” the old woman shushed her daughter, making everyone let out a laugh
“and i’m going to meet him. today”
“wait the shootings are already starting?” tom asked you.
“no, it’s just that the cast is going to have dinner together today. and i’m going to meet SKEET ULRICH”
“tell us more. where’s it gonna be?”
“i’ll tell you all after you take my order, ‘cause im like really hungry… please?”
keisha comes running to the cashier area, to get your order. there’s another man there too in all black with a black cap too, kind of covering his face - he's probably waiting for a while now since the workers were all in a circle screaming and jumping few seconds ago.
you watch keisha greet the guy and take his order, walking to the cashier area to stand right beside him.
as she’s there taking notes of his order, he looks at you and pushes his cap up, while you turn your head to see him. you’re now able to see his face.
“oh my fucking god” you think.
“hi, i’m skeet. what a funny coincidence! we’re filming scream 7 together, right?” he greets you with a handshake and a grin, as you turn your body to him and not just your head
keisha gasps. she starts laughing at your face as she goes to prepare his order.
there’s no fucking way. skeet ulrich is right in front of you and 100% heard you saying he’s hot and you have a crush on him. your cheeks turn red.
“hello” you say stuttering a bit “i’m y/n y/l/n, it’s nice to meet you” your hands still in his. his touch is warm and you find yourself not wanting to drop it. but you did, before it makes the situation awkward.
it’s not like you love him. it’s just that you’ve had a crush on him for the last 15 years. not a big deal… right?
you remember your own words.
i shouldn’t care about what he thinks of me. he’s a human like anyone else, so i’m gonna act like i always do.
“that’s it” you finish your sentence once again, but this time not out loud.
“so…” he starts
“here’s your order, sir. sorry for the wait, again”
“it’s okay, don’t worry about it. i was called hot, you know”
he really heard you. “shit”, you think to yourself
keisha laughs. you eye her, looking done and she covers her mouth to stop laughing.
“i’ll wait for you”
“nice. he wants to sit with me. how awkward is that going to be?” you think, but you stop quickly “no. it’s not going to be awkward. once again, he’s just a normal guy who’s talking to me! nothing more than that”
“like always, please”
keisha nods, still with a smile in her face stopping herself from laughing again. she goes to the kitchen and start preparing your order.
“listen, i’m sorry. can you pretend you didn’t hear me? please?”
“right ma’am. you didn’t lie, though. i am indeed hot”
“hey!” you reply, chuckling.
“sorry, sorry. but you laughed”
you start talking to him, waiting for keisha to come with your order. she’s usually really fast with your order, but today it’s taking a little too long.
she’s definitely doing it on purpose for you to keep talking to him.
you’re really enjoying it, though. he’s a nice guy and you’re a nice girl, a perfect match. you seem to get along really well. you notice something quickly - his moves are gentle and not too fast. you’re the complete opposite, but you love it when people move calmly like this, it comforts you, you have no idea why.
keisha gives you your order as you thank her and gives her a smile.
“let’s go ma’am” he smirks at you, guiding you to a table.
“you come here often?” he asks, obviously making fun of you
“take a guess” you say and you both giggle.
“is it going to be your first time?” he asks
“hm?”
“playing a part in a movie”
oh.
“ah yes. i’ve never been part of a movie before. i’m really nervous about it to be honest. i’m not sure if i’ll be able to do my best”
“don’t worry, it’s not rocket science. all you’re going to do is pretend to be someone for a while”
“are you sure that’s all?”
“well, i told myself that exact same thing for every role i played and it went great”
“i’m talking to billy loomis right now, so i guess i’ll have to trust you.”
“yes, i’m a middle aged hot man, you should trust me”
you both laugh and he starts again “jokes aside, i’ll always be on set. if you need some advice, just call me and i’ll help you, ok?“
“thank you skeet. i really appreciate it”
you kept talking to him until you were both done eating.
somehow, this guy makes you feel comfortable around him. maybe it’s just your daddy issues, but you doubt it. this man has something in him that feels just right.
“we gotta go now. we have dinner with the cast, remember?”
“am i gonna have to see you again?” you joke as you get up and he does too, and he gasps ironically
“the middle-aged man here did not like it!”
“oh stop it” you say walking beside him to the exit and he chuckles softly.
“you want a ride home, kid?” skeet asks you, as he turns to you.
“no thanks, i live near here. you can go”
“okay then, see you later tonight!” he waves tilting his head and smiling softly as he enters his car. you wave back.
“wait”
“yes?”
“do you want me to pick you up for dinner?”
oh god. you wanted to say yes, but what about dave? wouldn’t he be upset?
“i’m sorry skeet, dave’s already going to pick me up” you say, with sort of a sad tone, trying not to upset skeet.
“it’s alright. dave, huh?” he smirks at you
“do not.” you reply quickly, raising your eyebrowns and lowering your head
“okay, okay” he laughs “see ya!”
you smile in response.
in 3 seconds, you’re going to process everything that just happened.
3,
2,
1.
“no way” you say out loud.
someone touched your shoulders behind you, making you jump with the unexpected touch, relaxing right after you see it’s angelica
“little girl you better tell me everything” she said with her hands still on your shoulders.
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maitanii · 1 year
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TOKYO REVENGERS INSTAGRAM HEADCANONS
an: missed me? I'm back with more shitty headcanons :*
MIKEY
— He likes to post the cringiest stories that you've ever seen on Instagram. You know the Facebook memes that old women post on Instagram? Yeah, that kind of thing.
— The only comments that he receives are Baji's emojis (🤣🤣🤣🤣)
— His feed is made of photos of the Toman founders and blurry photos of his bike.
— He doesn't use Instagram to flirt. He, in fact, doesn't know how to flirt.
DRAKEN
— He doesn't really post anything. Sometimes Emma tags him on a story and he re-posts it, but that's it.
— His feed is made of two photos: one of his bike and one in a mirror with Emma.
— He comments on every single Toman member post with "🔥🔥" or "lol".
BAJI
—Technology grandma.
—He posts 1715 stories per day, and all of them are the same blurry pic of Peke J.
— Feed full of photos. Some better some worse.
— Sometimes he'll post a question sticker, but he doesn't know how to answer them.
— He really tries to flirt through DM's. (Key word: tries)
— One time, a fake profile commented on one of his photos saying "You're HOT 🔥💋 Want to meet🔥?" and he tried to talk to them. Mitsuya is still laughing about it.
CHIFUYU
— Average Instagram user.
— Cute selfies of him and Peke J. Some random cafeteria. Photos of Toman reunions.
—His feed is empty but he does have his stories organized.
— He has flirted more than once through DM's.
— He mostly uses Insta to send memes to Kazutora and Takemichi. I would say Baji but Baji literally doesn't get memes.
KAZUTORA
— Now, this one.
— Feed empty. No profile picture. Stories are made of sad songs and question stickers of "someone wants to talk". Chifuyu answers to them every single time. Baji just goes to his house.
— He has a meme account.
— DM king.
— He also sends Chifuyu screenshots of Mikey's stories. They have loads of inside jokes with them.
MITSUYA
—Inmaculate feed. Best photographer.
— He usually posts photos of Hakkai modeling his designs, Luna and Mana, cups of coffee and his bike.
— His feed doesn't have a lot of photos, but they're enough to know about him and his past.
— He doesn't flirt through DM's.
— He also sends DRAKEN screenshots of Mikey's posts.
HAKKAI
—Instagram king.
— He's a model. What else should I say.
— Whenever he gets tagged by Yuzuha, he reposts the story.
—His feed is made of his professional photos.
— DM's for business enquires.
PAH CHIN AND PEH YAN
—These two come together.
— They have an account "for entrepreneurs" where they share pixelated pictures of "wise advice".
— Bitcoin bros.
— Comment on every single Elon Musk posts with " you're right bro🔥🔥🔥"
SANZU
— His profile pic is a cat.
— Private account with a few followers. Not that he cares about that.
— His feed is made of 2 photos, and both of them are from 5 years ago. One of them is with Mikey (Retrica effect included) and the other one is a cheese cake.
— His stories are quite pleasant to see, he's a good photographer.
HAITANI RAN
— ...
— Instagram king wannabe.
— His feed is made of amazing photos. He's beautiful and he knows how to get his features to shine.
— His stories... debatable.
— He tries to make himself to look interesting. And maybe it works with some people. But not with his acquaintances. Rindou always answers to his stories with "🔥🔥 so deep bro🔥🔥" while he's laughing with his friends behind the screen.
— King of flirting though DM's tho.
HAITANI RINDOU
—Gymbro
—Shares inspirational videos from TikTok and gym photos on his stories.
— Feed with a few photos, but not empty. Some are with his brother and some from parties. Quite aesthetic.
—Doesn't really use DM's.
INUI
—Is not interested in social media, but has an account because Koko told him he needed one for his business.
—He doesn't post stories, only photos of bikes on his feed.
—Once he posted one of himself with a bike and all the comments were "bro is beautiful".
—Koko follows him with a fake profile.
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darlingofdots · 4 months
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Formal vs Informal Address in German Temeraire Translations: a report
So I have picked up my German copies of the Temeraire books for the first time in over a decade for reasons unrelated to this post but I immediately got distracted by the matter of formal address in German and how translators have to make a very specific and important choice when translating from English. German (like French and many other languages) has two forms of direct address in the 2nd person, an informal one for friends, family, children etc., and a formal address for strangers, teachers, colleagues, professional contacts. It is famously a Whole Thing when you switch from formal to informal with somebody: usually the person with a 'higher' position in the relationship has to explicitly offer it and it can be a big deal! A common instance might be when you've worked at a new job for a while and your colleagues tell you to use informal to indicate they consider you Part Of The Team, or your girlfriend's parents do it when you've been dating a while and they signal that you're part of the family now. In translation, this can be a really tricky choice! For instance, I have not watched Elementary in German but I would say Sherlock and Joan would absolutely start out addressing each other formally (Sherlock calls her "Watson" most of the time), but by the end of the show there is no way they would not have switched. Obviously English-language media does not have an explicit conversation about this and the closest analogue would be switching to first names when they've only ever used last names before, but you can't rely on that and translators end up having to make choices about characterisation and relationships based on like, vibes. With all that said!
In the Temeraire series, there's a lot of formal address around, such as among officers; I knew Laurence would be addressing his cadets formally because even though they are like, 9 years old, they are his officers and deserve to be treated with that respect. I only have books 1-5 in German but I'd be willing to bet that this doesn't change even Emily's been with him for nigh on ten years, and the same goes for Temeraire. Also Laurence uses formal address with both his parents, in case you were wondering.
What I was not sure about was a) how other people address dragons and how dragons address each other and b) the finer interpersonal relationships among aviators. Jane addresses Iskierka formally but Temeraire informally; the dragons of the formation are formal with each other but Temeraire, Lily, and Maximus are not, and Temeraire quite happily scolds Iskierka like a misbehaving child. I would LOVE to find a bit of, say, Laurence talking to Lily or Berkley to Temeraire!
Among the aviators, Laurence and Jane are informal with each other once they've slept together, but I just saw that Laurence is also informal with Harcourt but not with Chenery, which is interesting but I suppose makes sense if you go by the dragons' relationships too. What really fascinates me is that at the end of Victory of Eagles, Laurence and Granby are still formal, which makes sense because until five minutes ago Laurence was his superior officer, but if I were the translator for this series I'd have them switch to informal with the beginning of book six but unfortunately I do not have that on hand so I can't check.
Now for the main event: Tharkay uses formal address with Laurence when he leaves to fetch more ferals at the beginning of book 4, and I thought he switched for the infamous "Laurence, what are you doing" which would have been exactly the right moment if you'd asked me, but in fact there is one random informal when they're out rescuing Granby in London (loose quotation: "that is [Woolvey's] problem and for those who would weep for him, even if they are close to your [informal] heart")? And then he goes right back to formal all the way to "Laurence, what are you [informal] doing" and finally switches properly, at which point Laurence follows his example. At first I thought that was weird and I am not sure if it was done on purpose, but on second thought I kind of like that he tries it out first when speaking of something personal (Laurence's concern for Edith) but isn't sure of it yet and retreats back to familiar territory until he realises that he needs to shock Laurence out of his war crime depression.
It's interesting to me that Tharkay was the one to take that step. Traditionally, like I said, it would be on the person in a position of authority to offer or, like with Granby, Laurence could have just switched once Granby was confirmed in rank to indicate that he wants to be friends now that he doesn't give orders anymore. Of course it makes perfect sense that Tharkay would not care one bit about rank, and he's not really an officer anyway and he certainly does not consider Laurence to have authority over him. I love that the translator (Marianne Schmidt) recognised that moment on campaign for what I think it is: not so much a turning point in their relationship but one that cements a degree of intimacy that Laurence doesn't have with anyone else. They would not have had access to book 6, I think, when they were working on book 5, so it very much is a deliberate choice based on their interactions up to this point. I made a list recently about people that Will Laurence calls by their first name (former first lieutenants, Catherine Harcourt, 1 FWB, and Tharkay) and now I feel like I need to make another list of people German!Will Laurence uses informal address with!
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championofsanghelios · 11 months
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love...
SPOILERS FOR TOTK (YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED) "Did something happen with you and Link?" "What?" Sidon snaps out of his daze as he hears Yona's voice. He turns around to face her, letting out a small gasp. "What- What are you doing up here? It's hardly a safe place for-" "-because he seemed pretty upset with you from what Rivan and Bazz told me." Yona continues, tilting her head at him. "Something about...past interactions." "..." The Prince blinks a few times, shaking his head. "...I-...what? I didn't find him to be upset or disagreeable...in fact he seemed quite happy to see me after all this time. I know I was delighted to see him." He tilts his head much like she had. "What makes you say that?" "Your father actually..." Yona sighs. "I went to see him at the Sanctuary and he said he was concerned about what might happen when Link learned that you and I were...well you know." "Instigating old guppy..." Sidon breathes out deep through his gills, shaking his head. He was suddenly realising what she was getting at. "I assure you the stuff that happened between Link and myself is in the past...I'm not entirely sure what drew us together originally, but it's no longer the case." "Well it's not in the past for him." Yona replies, giving her fiancee a look. One she'd given him many times throughout the years they'd known one another. "...he remembers it quite vividly." "Well you can tell my Father that I detected absolutely no signs of-" "-not for him, you silly shark!" Yona breathes a laugh, stepping forwards and prodding him gently on the arm. "For Link. Did you actually look at him when you spoke to him?" "Of course I did." Sidon replies flatly. Glancing to the right slightly. Desperately trying to remember what colour of tunic Link was wearing, if he was even wearing one at all. "It's-...it's only good manners to make eye contact with the person you're speaking to." "Like you're making eye contact with me right now?" "Uh-" "Sidon." "Alright! Maybe I was distracted by what I'm doing here!" the Prince suddenly snips, gesturing at the sludge raining down around them, and the brown gloomy mess that the waters had become. "There is a little bit of an issue if you haven't noticed! One that is taking up a considerable portion of my concentration." "Sidon." Yona continues. "He still cares about you a great deal. Maybe you're not prepared to accept that given that you've moved on from him, but the truth is the truth, no matter how much you try to ignore it." "I'm not ignoring it." he mutters. He turns from her, shaking his head. "I'm just-...it was a long time ago...we're different people now." "Do you still care about him?" is the next question, and as if she couldn't have asked a better one at the most perfect time, he finds himself turning back to her. "What sort of a question is that!?" Sidon exclaims, almost hurt by it on some level. "Of course I care about him! He's my best friend in the world! Why wouldn't I!?" Yona simply smiles at that. "...you should talk to him...properly, when you next see him." "We have a lot to do..." Sidon manages to find the words after a moment, breathing a deep sigh. "...you, my father and I have a Domain to keep safe...but Link? He-...he has 5 Kingdoms to check up on, a Princess to find. There's nothing I could do or say for him that would ease that burden." "This was the first place he came too...after finding his way back to Hyrule." Yona says after a beat. "...and do you know when he walked up to me in the Plaza that first time...his first thought was to ask where you were." Sidon processes that as she says it, his eyes widening a fraction. "...I-...It was?" "When people are under threat of losing everything they tend to seek out what matters to them most." Yona adds finally. "...for comfort, for help...and in his case...love.
She sighs, smiling a little more when she sees it all dawn her fiancee's face. He remembers that you never gave up on him, that you believed in him when he needed it most...next time you see him, make sure you don't betray his memory of you..."
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imaginespazzi · 2 months
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Part 2: If Only You'd Been Here
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Masterlist - Part 1 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5
Ain't nobody hurt you like I hurt you (but ain't nobody love you like I do)
(In which a sadistic writer tortures her beloved ship a fair amount and maybe her readers too)
Pairing: Paige Bueckers X Azzi Fudd
Themes: Angst, Pining, Hurt/Comfort and maybe Fluff if you squint
Words: 6.5K (someone please be proud that it is in fact shorter 🙈)
TW: Swearing, Alcohol, Injuries, Alludes to Sexual Content
A/N: Good morning my lovelies <3 Just a couple of things I changed that you should know before you read. If you follow WCBB, you know UCLA didn't win the Pac-12 tournament in 2023 but in this universe they did. You also probably know they lost in the NCAA tournament last year to SC in the Greenville region but in this universe, for plot purposes, they're gonna be in the Seattle region. I kept their seeding and who they were playing vague because it was gonna get too complicated to figure out. Also if you saw my list of part titles a while ago, no you didn't lol. As always, feel free to know what you liked, what you didn't, and anything you'd like to see in future parts. And as you're reading, let's just remember y'all love me and everything I do is for the plot. Happy reading and have a wonderful week lovelies!
December 2022
The distinctly “car” smell of her car is starting to make Paige more than a little nauseous. Going by the way Drew is pouting in the passenger seat, he’s also clearly over it. They’ve been driving in circles for what feels like hours. At first, still enamoured with being allowed to sit in the front, her little brother had gone along with her ridiculousness. Now, as they approach maybe the 12th or so lap around the neighbourhood, he seems less than thrilled. 
“Alright let me out and you keep driving,” Drew says, fiddling agitatedly with his seatbelt, “I think I’m gonna puke.”
“Well hold it in,” Paige retorts unhelpfully as they re-round the block. She keeps her eyes focused on the road, ignoring the glare her brother sends her away. He takes in a dramatic breath and leans back onto his seat. She grips the steering wheel tighter as they pass the house again, still not brave enough to pull into the driveaway of a place she’d once considered just as much a home as her own. 
Drew lets out another groan, “I shoulda just stayed home.”
“Well you didn’t-” Paige’s reply is cut off by the sound of a phone call reverberating around the car. The CallerID reads “Azzi (DON’T YOU DARE IGNORE)”, a name the younger girl had plugged in herself with a warning look the day Paige had left LA. Chewing whatever dry skin is still left on her bitten-to-death lips, Paige clicks accept on the call. 
“What number lap is this?” comes Azzi’s exasperated voice and Paige can’t help the smile that creeps onto her face. 
“Oh you know my car’s feeling the need to exercise today,” Paige hums back, suddenly feeling a lot lighter than she had just a couple of seconds ago. Sometimes, she’s not sure how she managed to go a year with this constant heavy weight pressing down on her ribs, and no Azzi to slowly ease her out from under it. 
“Azziiiiii,” Drew whines dramatically, “please come save me. I’m gonna die in this car.”
Affronted, Paige splutters, “nobody forced you to come.”
“You begged me to come,” her young brother quips back and it elicits a laugh from the girl on the other end of the line. 
“I did-”
“Paige,” Azzi cuts her off, “just come inside okay? You’re wasting gas for nothing.”
“I- it’s just-,” Paige’s hands tighten even more around the wheel, as she stops on the sidewalk, switching on her turn signal, but still not entering the driveway. She leans her head against the wheel, overwhelmed by emotions she can’t quite name. Drew places a comforting hand on her back and she sends him a reassuring smile, trying to shield her younger brother from the havoc in her brain. 
“Hey,” Azzi’s voice floats through the fog, “it’s just me okay? Me and you and us. It’ll be okay. I promise.”
It’s like a child being soothed with their favourite binkie, that’s what Azzi’s promise feels like to Paige. She finally turns into the driveaway, and both Drew and Azzi cheer in tandem. The knot in her chest loosens just a little bit at that because the large crowds that scream for her make her feel adored, but this, her own personal cheer squad for her littlest of achievements, well it makes her feel loved. 
“Freedom,” Drew yells as he practically flings himself out of Paige’s barely parked car. She rolls her eyes fondly at her mini me as he dramatically pretends to kiss the ground. It’s a small distraction from the memories that are swirling like a tornado in her mind. Minnesota is home, it’ll always be home but this place, this had been her safe haven, something she could hold onto at a time where everything else was slipping out of her hands. And then, like a fool, she’d let go of it. 
The door opens even before they’ve made it halfway to the door and Azzi’s brothers run out into the front yard. Jon pretends to take pictures and José practically falls to his knees as they swarm around the blonde. 
“Paige, Paige, can we get a picture or an autograph please,” they yell teasingly, “please Miss Bueckers we’re your biggest fans.”
“Move over boys,” Tim Fudd’s booming voice hollers, as he swats his children away, “her biggest fan is actually me eh Paige?”
The girl in question nods solemnly, her smile stretching the full length of her face, and both Jon and José let out a groan as their father beams at Paige. And then Katie’s there, not a hint of anything but pure happiness on her face as she wraps the younger girl into a hug. Paige melts into the embrace, trying her hardest not to burst into tears. Because all she can think about is the hundreds of calls and texts from Azzi that she’d left unanswered, all she can think of is Azzi's devastated face as she’d told Paige about just how hard she’d tried and that wretched ache of i don’t deserve this i broke your daughters heart wraps itself around Paige’s  heart. 
Over Katie’s shoulder, Paige watches as Azzi finally walks out into the law, her cheeks immediately turning red from the cold. The younger girl winks at Paige with a radiant smile, before giving all her attention to Drew who almost trips as he excitedly launches himself into Azzi, tiny hands wrapping around her waist. Paige watches, still buried in the warmth of Katie’s arms, as Drew animatedly tells Azzi all the stories he possibly can and Azzi nods along emphatically as if she’s being told the most important facts of her life. And Paige takes a snapshot of it to add to her ever growing collection of moments i just knew. 
***
January 2023
“Call her.”
Paige doesn’t bother replying, burying her face further into her tear-soaked pillow. Maybe if she ignores her teammate, Caroline will get the message and go away. The earth-shattering pain that she’d subdued for the last couple of months had finally reared its ugly head. And that too at the worst time possible, when her team needed to be a source of strength and with cameras catching the teardrops falling as she mourned the loss of not being able to play in the epic UConn-Tennessee rivalry. She’d done so well at holding it in, breaking apart only a couple of times, sometimes alone and sometimes with Azzi on the other end of the line. Until tonight, when the bright lights and roaring crowd had reignited the itch to just fucking play ball. 
“Paige,” Caroline says again, “stop being stubborn and call her.”
“She has a game tomorrow, she doesn’t need my dramatic ass worrying her right now,” Paige replies, getting into a sitting position when she realises the other girl isn’t about to just let this go. 
“You’re eventually going to call her. The two of you haven’t gone one day without talking to each other since this summer,” Caroline gives her a look, a hint of a smirk play on her face when it tints Paige’s cheeks pink, “seriously, just call her.”
It’s not that Paige doesn’t want to. She’d scrolled through her contacts and stopped at Azzi’s one too many time’s tonight. And each time, just as her fingers had hovered over the green call button, she’d felt guilt claw at her neck. Since she’d shown up in LA, Azzi had shown up for Paige every step of the way, checking in regularly, listening to Paige vent her anger at the world and whispering words of comfort that only sounded true when they came from Azzi’s mouth. Sometimes, if she tries really hard, Paige can feel the ghost of Azzi’s arms wrapping themselves around her shoulders, just as they had that one night in LA when Azzi had held her, so delicately as if she was made of porcelain, through the worst of her breakdowns. 
“She needs to focus on her game,” Paige says after a moment. 
Caroline sighs, mind wandering to the countless texts on her phone from Azzi begging her to take care of Paige and to let her know when the blonde wasn’t doing okay, “I know but she’d want you to call her if she knew. You need her.”
“And where was I when she needed me?” it’s the word need that triggers it, the quick snap because it’s all Paige has been able to think about lately. 
Without basketball, she’d had far too much time on her hands and she’d ended up going down a spiral of watching Azzi’s games from her freshman year, something she’d religiously avoided doing when they had happened live. At first, it had just been this immense feeling of pride, seeing her best friend be the college basketball phenomenon Paige had always known she would be. She’d shoved away the envy of it was supposed to be us that immersed her seeing the way the Bruins celebrated their new star player, and just let herself be happy in her best friend’s happiness. 
And then something changed around at the beginning of January 2022. It had only lasted a couple of games, but Azzi had hit a wall. Threes were short, cuts were made at the wrong time and she kept on getting lost on defence in a way that was very unlike her. And all Paige could focus on, eyes glued to the screen, was how completely and utterly exhausted Azzi looked during that stretch, despite the fact that she’d just come back from winter break. The smile had vanished off her face, replaced by stress lines Paige wished she could go back in time and erase. 
It wasn’t until she’d binged through all the games, cheering silently as Azzi slowly returned to form, that the realisation had hit Paige. She’d been slapped with the memory of a store decorated brightly for Christmas and a familiar voice calling her name, as she’d purposely walked the other way, pretending she hadn’t heard and the more than deserved i’m done trying text that had followed right after. For a year, perhaps longer, Paige had convinced herself that she was the only one who had lost something, she was the only one who had a right to hurt, to break. And still, she thinks she’d take all of that pain again a thousand times, if it means she could erase the fact that in all of her self-pity, she’d broken Azzi too.
“Where was I when she needed me?” she repeats again to Caroline, as the brunette stares at her in confusion, “the answer to that Carol, is that I was anywhere but with her.”
Caroline’s eyes soften in realisation as she takes a cautious step towards Paige, “oh P don’t do this to yourself.”
“I want to call her,” Paige confesses in a whisper, tears brimming in her eyes, “it’s the only thing I’ve wanted to do all day and maybe- maybe I should have but I’m just- I’ve been so unfair to her.”
“You were hurt Paige.”
“I know- I know that. But so was she. You don’t- god Carol- you don’t even know the things I said to her before she left for LA. And she’s still here,” the first tears fall from her blue eyes, and then the next and the next until there’s a steady waterfall streaming down her face, “you know I almost didn’t let her in when she first came over this summer?”
Caroline doesn’t say anything, choosing instead to come sit next to Paige and wrap her arms around the point guard. 
“I didn’t answer her calls or her texts for a year and still, still she’s picked up every call, replied to every text I’ve sent her since summer. I know- I know I need her and she’s going to be there of course she is. But when she needed me, where was I?” Paige drops her face into her hands, “I just- I don’t deserve her.”
There’s a moment of silence as Caroline rubs Paige’s back and lets the older girl wallow in her guilt. And then she reaches for Paige’s phone on the nightstand, ignoring the little grunt of protest. When the screen lights up, there’s already a notification of new messages from Azzi and Caroline can’t help but smile. 
“I think,” she begins softly, “Azzi’s a smart girl so maybe give that tiny little brain of yours a little bit of rest and let her decide who deserves her,” she hands Paige her phone “let her be there for you. I think maybe she needs that too.”
Caroline gives Paige’s shoulders a little squeeze before heading out the doors, giving the older girl a moment of privacy. Paige sighs, getting herself comfortable against her pillows, and rubbing away her tears, before finally giving in and pressing the facetime call button. 
“Do you want a distraction or do you want to talk about it?” Azzi says as soon as she picks up and Paige can see the concern etched all over her face.
“Or maybe I’m perfectly fine?”
“Ah we’re playing the pretend game tonight. Should have cleared your throat for a second longer maybe Miss Perfectly Fine, your eyes are red as fuck and you sound like a dying cat.” 
“Wow, that was rude. Maybe I’m sick?” 
“With what? The “lies to her best friend” flu?”
“That UCLA education has you making up illnesses now? Damn Az, you’re supposed to get smarter in college.”
“You’re so funny, like so funny,” Azzi huffs sarcastically before they both dissolve into giggles. It’s always just been so easy with them. And Paige’s isn’t a poet, but if she was, she’d write sonnets about the sound of Azzi’s laughter, and the way it makes the corner of her eyes crinkle. 
“I watched the game,” Azzi says after a second, “and I saw you.”
Paige smirks, “so you didn’t actually watch the game, just stared at my gorgeous face the whole time?”
“There’s that comedian streak of yours again.”
“Hey you’re the one who said you were watching me instead of the game. But who could blame you really?”
“I didn’t-” Azzi rolls her eyes, as Paige’s cocky smirk deepens, “stop it.”
“You can admit I’m a pretty girl Az,” she teases, delighted when it makes the younger girl blush. 
“Fuck off, you have enough people telling you you’re a pretty girl.”
“Yeah but it means more coming from you,” she says quietly, biting her lip. It’s not the kind of thing you’re supposed to say to your best friend, at least not in the soft, wanting way that Paige says it. Except they both know that the lines in their friendship are far more blurred than they should be, even if they've both done a pretty fantastic job at ignoring that kiss. Paige had learned over Christmas that Azzi was exceptionally good at the pretending part, moving away the moment Paige’s hands lingered a little longer than they should, changing topics if they even got anywhere near addressing the something between them. It shouldn’t have hurt but it did and Paige doesn’t understand how she can so desperately miss something that she never even had in the first place. 
“So distraction then?” Azzi says after a second, changing the subject back to her initial question. 
Paige closes her eyes, taking in a deep breath, “it was just- it was a lot tonight. I didn’t realise I was being that obvious.”
“You weren’t. I just know you a little too well.”
“These are my favourite types of games, you know. The rivalry, the crowd booing my name and getting the chance to quiet them, that’s- that’s the type of game players live for and I just- I miss it Azzi. I miss shooting, I miss defending, I miss just standing on the fucking court sometimes. I miss playing basketball. So. Fucking. Much,” a fresh set of tears leak out of Paige's eyes, as her free hand fists at her bedsheets. 
There’s silence as Paige’s words linger in the air. In a way it’s freeing to be able to say it out loud, to just let herself feel how she feels instead of fighting them. 
“You’re gonna miss it every day until you play again,” Azzi says quietly, her own voice thick with emotions, “and it’s not really gonna get easier until you get it back. But when you finally do, just- just imagine it okay, your first game back. The feeling of the crowd. Dribbling up the court. Making that first shot as everybody loses their minds. Finally just playing the game you love. That’s when that feeling of loss will finally go away.”
Using Azzi’s steady breathing as an anchor to still her erratic heartbeat, Paige lets herself get lost in the picture the younger girl has just painted for her. She lets her mind run to the future that lies ahead of her and if she focuses hard enough she can almost hear the Gampel crowds roaring as she finally returns to the court. 
“It’s kinda really fucking annoying how you always know what to say,” no it isn’t, it’s the only thing that’s keeping Paige going these days. 
“Surviving an ACL injury will do that to a girl,” Azzi says with a pained smile. 
That’s not it Paige thinks, it’s not experience, it’s you and I really wish you were here. But she can’t say that, so she changes the subject instead. 
“Tell me about your game tomorrow.”
They both settle back into their pillows, getting into more comfortable positions. Azzi tells Paige all about her upcoming game and then moves onto another topic, then another and another and another. They’ll wake up tomorrow morning to phones that died and no memory of when they’d fallen asleep. And then they’ll remember who was on the other end of the line, and if that makes them smile a little too hard, well that’s just another thing they’ll pretend didn’t happen. 
***
March 2023
It’s only natural that when Paige finally feels like she can learn to live with just having a little bit of Azzi, that the world would show her just how wrong she could be. She’s been in a much better headspace these days, her knee finally starting to feel like itself again, bit by bit. The guilt of not being able to help her team is still settled into the pits of her stomach but even with that, she’s reached a sort of acceptance. And while she’s still struggling to fight the part of her heart that wants so much more, she’s learning to be content with just having her best friend back.
It’s that little bit of time in between conference tournaments and the NCAA tournament when it feels like the calm before the storm and it’s the first weekend since before the season that the UConn team finally gets to go out and let loose for a bit. They’re riding the height of winning another Big East title and even if it’s a little bittersweet that they did it without her, Paige is beyond the moon happy for her team. 
She turns up the music in her room and changes the lights for the sake of a little ambience, before sitting down at her desk, to call Azzi and do what little of her makeup she knows how to do. Normally she’d get one of the other girls or Kayla to do it, but she’d rather sacrifice a flawless makeup look then miss out on having Azzi tease her about how she still didn’t quite know how to do her eyeliner properly yet. 
The fact that it takes Azzi longer than the third ring to pick up should be Paige’s first warning sign but instead she’s sucking in a deep breath at the sight of her best friend who looks breathtakingly beautiful tonight. Paige’s heart stutters as she takes in Azzi’s face, the light layer of red lipstick (that Paige wants to kiss off), the blush-tinged cheeks (that Paige wants to caress delicately) and the perfectly done mascara on her eyelashes (that Paige wants to feel flutter against her own skin). 
She lets out a low appreciative whistle, “celebrating that Pac-12 championship in style huh?”
“Something like that,” Azzi bites her lip and really that should have been warning sign number two, “was there- was there something you needed?’
“I can’t just call you?” Paige asks, noticing the tension on Azzi’s face, “are you busy?”
“No it’s not-”
“She is actually,” a different voice cuts in aggressively and Azzi immediately gives whoever it is an exasperated look. Paige doesn’t know who it is, but she guesses it’s one of the UCLA players. It’s no secret they aren’t huge fans of her. They’d made that much clear the few times they’d met Paige during September, always regarding her with a wary eyes. It wasn’t their fault really, Paige understood their protectiveness, in fact she appreciated it more than they would ever understand. 
“Chill Angela.” 
“Are you not busy then?” the other voice who Paige assumes is Angela Dugalic says, clearly a little annoyed. And then Azzi’s phone is being shifted away from her and instead it’s Angela’s face that covers Paige’s screen. 
“Oh,” the blonde manages to get out, taken aback by the sudden change, “hi Angela.”
“Hi Paige,” the other girl says, her voice dripping with saccharine sweetness. 
“Angela,” there’s a clear warning in Azzi’s voice and Paige already knows, even before the words are let out into the open, that whatever Dugalic is about to say is going to tear her apart. 
“Azzi has a date tonight,” Angela pronounces the last words with a gleeful lilt. 
The world spins and Paige’s head spins with it, as she grips onto her desk for some semblance of stability. She can hear Azzi spluttering in the background as she tries to get her phone back but it’s of no use as the UCLA forward powers on. 
“With a really pretty girl,” Angela smirks at the camera, clearly trying to prove something, “Zoe’s really wonderful. You’d like her, Paige.”
Zoe. Recognition registers in Paige’s brain. She remembers seeing the name flashing on Azzi’s phone a couple of times, accompanied by a photo she never quite caught a glimpse of. But as she tended to do with most phone calls that came during her time with Paige, Azzi had simply just declined the call and texted whoever that she’d call her back later. And so Paige hadn’t really bothered caring about Zoe, chalking her up to being some random friend Azzi had made. But fuck, maybe she should have cared. 
“And Azzi really likes her I think. They’ve been tiptoeing around it for ages you know? But we all knew it was only a matter of time.”
A strangled noise escapes Paige’s throat and she tries her best to disguise it as anything but the cry of despair it is. It feels like there’s a thousand knives digging into her skin, pressing harder and harder until she has no blood left to bleed. 
“They’re gonna make the cu-”
“Give me my phone back Angela,” Azzi’s voice cuts in harshly and Paige hurriedly rushes to contort her features into a smile right before the camera’s back to facing her best friend. 
“So you’re all dressed up for a date then?” Paige manages to get out and the word date sounds like bile on her tongue. 
“Doesn’t she look lovely?” comes Angela’s voice again; the girl seemingly on a mission to break Paige as much as possible, “give her a proper look Az.”
“Angela,” Azzi hisses through gritted teeth. 
“N-no show me the fit,” Paige counters, because that’s what a best friend’s supposed to say right? Show me how fucking perfect you look for a girl that’s not me
Azzi hesitates, swallowing nervously, before she takes a couple of steps back so the camera captures all of her. And Paige wishes she’d never asked to be shown in the first place, hell she wishes she’d never bothered to call tonight. Because she thinks the image of Azzi’s casual light blue jeans and simple green off-the shoulder top will be etched in her mind forever, captioned with the words not for you. 
“You look lovely Azzi,” she whispers quietly, trying to keep her voice steady.
“Zoe won’t be able to keep her fucking hands off of you,” Angela supplies and this time the glare Azzi shoots her is murderous. 
“I think I hear Emily calling your name Angela.”
“I don’t-”
“Yes,” Azzi says pointedly, “yes you do.”
Angela rolls her eyes but doesn’t protest this time. She turns to the phone with a devilish grin, clearly feeling accomplished in being a menace, “nice talking to you Paige.”
She waltzes out, leaving Paige, Azzi and a silence that feels like it could drown them. 
“You could have told me,” the blond says after a second, averting her eyes from the screen, “aren’t dates the kind of thing best friends are supposed to tell each other?”
“Paige-”
“It’s good though- you-uh- you deserve a night out.”
“P-”
“Listen, I uh- I’m going out too so- I- umm- I better get going but-,” Paige takes in a deep breath, “have a- have wonderful time on your date Az.”
She hangs up before Azzi can reply, the concern in the younger girl's eyes becoming too much to bear. For a moment, she stares straight ahead at the wall, just processing. And then she lets herself fall apart. 
***
It’s 1 a.m., Paige is drunk and miserable and so fucking tired; it’s an extremely dangerous combination. Aaliyah and Amari had practically had to carry her to her dorm because she’d been stumbling far too much and everyone was worried she’d eventually fall flat on her face. Personally, Paige thought they just didn’t have enough faith in her. She wasn’t even that drunk, she couldn’t be. After all she could still feel that stupid Azzi-sized scar on heart and wasn’t the whole point of being drunk supposed to be not being able to feel? But she has to be drunk because sober her would know better than to do what she does next, would know better than to call Azzi when she has no control over herself. 
“Paige? Is everything okay? Are you okay,” Azzi’s voice is filled with concern when she answers.
“Azziiiii,” Paige slurs, “areyoustillwithyourdate?”
“What?”
“Are. you. still. with. your. date?” Paige pronounces each word slowly. 
“I- yeah. She’s in a different room. Paige, are you okay?” 
“Interesting,” the blonde remarks quietly, “you never picked up her calls when you were with me. And we weren’t even dating.”
She hears Azzi’s breath hitch on the other end, can almost picture her doing that nervous swallow of hers, “ I just want to make sure you’re okay.”
“You didn’t care if she was okay then? Those times she called you?”
“That’s not- she didn’t call me at 1 a.m.” the younger girl justifies hollowly. 
“Bullshit,” Paige scoffs, “1 a.m. isn’t even that fucking late. Why is it so hard for you to admit you care about me waaaayyyyy more than you care about Zara or whatever?”
“Zoe. You’re drunk Paige, go to bed,” and Paige really should listen to the edge in Azzi’s voice.
“Where did y’all go?” she asks lightly, changing the subject, “c’mon Az, best friends share their date stories right?”
“Baltaire,” Azzi relents, choosing to let this battle go. 
“Oooh that restaurant we passed that one time wow,” Paige coos, “too fucking bad you hate fine dining huh? But she wouldn’t know that now would she? Because she doesn’t fucking know you.”
“Paige please,” Azzi breathes out quietly in a pained voice.
“But you know who does know you? Me. And I would have never taken you to some boring old fancy ass piece of shit restaurant like that.”
“Don’t-”
“I would have taken you on a picnic. Do you remember that park you loved, the one by my air bnb? There, that’s where I would have taken you. And I’d have gotten you supermarket sushi even though I fucking hate that shit but I know, I know, you like it. And flowers. Did she get you flowers? Because I- I would have. Roses and peonies and lilies, a whole fucking bouquet.”
And Paige is crying again, for the second time tonight, one hand gripping at her phone as the other one tries to wipe away the frantically falling teardrops. 
“And we’d stay at that park til the sun goes out and I’d take a polaroid of you in the sunset and I’d keep it forever. I swear Azzi, I’d keep it forever and I’d put it on my wall.”
“Paige,” Azzi whispers, as if it’s the only word she knows, as if it’s the only word that matters. 
“I’d bring my laptop so that when it finally gets dark, we can watch a movie. You choose Az, whatever you want. And I’d get distracted and start playing with your hair or something and you’ll pretend it’s annoying you but you’d be smiling. Fuck I love your smile.”
“You can’t- you can’t just say these things Paige.”
“Why not? It’s the truth right- why can’t I say the truth?,” Paige says petulantly, “but hush okay I’m not- I’m not finished yet. And then, then we’d just lie under the stars and it'd just be you, me and the sky. Perfect.” 
Azzi lets out a broken sob and Paige hates it, she hates it but she keeps on talking. 
“And then I’d take you home and I’d kiss you,” she whispers the last bit like a confession, “everywhere. Fuck, I’d make it so good for you Az. So good. Everything you wanted, everything you needed, I’d give you all of it. I’d make you come apart on my fingers and then my tongue-”
“Shut up,” Azzi’s voice is suddenly cold and frosty and it feels like all the heat has been sucked out of Paige’s room as well, “shut up, shut up, shut up.”
“Azzi-”
“No,” Azzi all but yells, “you don’t get to say all of that to me.”
“Then who does? Her? Zia or whatever? Who the fuck even is she?” Paige spits out venomously.
“Zoe. Her name is Zoe and you wanna know she is Paige?” 
She should say no. She should apologise for interrupting Azzi’s date and hang up the phone, but no, Paige doesn’t do any of that, “enlighten me why don’t you.”
“She’s the girl who was there,” Azzi says, her voice cracking, “she’s the girl who held me last year when I was going through the worst time of my life. She was there when I couldn’t make a fucking shot and I thought maybe I’d never be good enough. She was there when I let the pressure and the media and all of it get to my head. She was there when I was crying my eyes out over losing the one person I was sure would always stay. She- she’s who you were supposed to be because she was there, and you weren’t.”
Paige isn’t sure if it’s the bitterness behind Azzi’s words or the brokenness of her sobs that is the reason for the ache in her own chest. All she knows is that she still remembers tearing her ACL, and she doesn’t think it hurt as much as this. 
“It was supposed to be you,” Azzi sniffles, “I wanted it to be you. Because I’d have let you- fuck- Paige- I’d have let you take me on a picninc and if you brought me sushi I’d have brought you your favorite mac and cheese. I- I know you don’t really care about flowers so I’d get you chocolate, the rum-filled ones that you love. And that sunset polaroid would have been a selfie of us, where you’re kissing my cheek and I’d have it framed. I’d pick out a movie but first- first you could watch whatever basketball game was on and you’d get exasperated when I don’t know the team because I’m literally a basketball player,” she lets out a wet laugh, “but I know you secretly like explaining the NBA to me. And then- then I’d have let you take me home and I’d let you take everything. Whatever you wanted, it’d be yours.”
The vivid image of a date that never happened fills every inch of Paige’s brain. She feels like she’s in a bad dream, trying so hard to reach for a happiness that keeps on evading her grasp. 
“But you weren’t there then Paige, and you aren’t here now.” 
“Azzi-” Paige chokes out. 
“Go to bed Paige,” the younger girl says, her voice shaky but adamant, ‘Get some sleep. Maybe you’re drunk enough that you won’t remember this when I call you tomorrow.”
“Right. So we’re gonna pretend this never happened. Again. We’ll just keep on pretending forever I guess,” Paige retorts bitterly. 
“Yes, we will. Because if I stop pretending, I don’t think I’ll be able to survive.”
***
The buzzer rings around Climate Pledge Arena as the UCLA women’s basketball team loses in the Elite 8 on a last second buzzer beater. Azzi’s face contorts into one of sheer disappointment, and in the stands, Paige feels her own heart drop. She’s not one to root for a team outside of her own and god knows what would happen if Nika found out that she’d been screaming her head off each time the Bruins, or at least one specific Bruin, scored, but for Azzi, well, there’s not many of her own rules that Paige follows when it comes to her best friend. 
It had taken a fair amount of convincing on Paige’s part to even be able to come to this game. Everyone had wanted to leave immediately after the Sweet 16 loss but Paige had insisted they needed to stay in Seattle, do something to get the team’s mind off of the terrible end to their season. And that wasn’t a complete lie because even if she hadn’t been able to help when they needed it on the court, she could try and help boost morale. But she knew her teammates weren’t fooled. They knew the schedule just as well as she did and they knew exactly what or better yet, who she wanted to stay for. 
On the court, Paige can tell Azzi’s fighting back tears. The brunette had given it her all, scoring an efficient 34 points and really the game could have gone any way. That last minute heave from the opposing team really probably shouldn’t have gone in, but at the end of the day the NCAA tournament was a lot about skill but also a little about luck. But Paige knows, Azzi isn’t thinking about any of that, too busy finding a way to blame herself even though she’d had a near perfect night. They were just too similar sometimes. 
Azzi’s eyes flicker through the stands, clearly looking for a familiar face. Paige resists the urge to run on to the court and pull the younger girl into her arms and soothe away the defeated look in her eyes, if only for the fact that Azzi doesn’t actually even know she’d figured out a way to stay back for this game. Despite being in the same city, they hadn’t been able to spend nearly as much time together and while Paige’s teammates had tried to be of some help, Azzi’s teammates had seemed determined to pull her away as much as possible. All of that on top of the fact that they’re still playing that stupid game of pretend had left Paige wanting for just one moment alone for the two of them. 
As soon as the UCLA team starts heading back to their locker room, and the crowd starts leaving, Paige scurries towards where she knows Azzi will be. Their assigned locker room isn’t that far from where UConn’s had been and Paige gets there in almost record time, her mind firmly planted on being there for Azzi. She’d missed so many opportunities, but this time, this time she’d be there. 
Azzi’s leaning against the wall, her eyes closed and Paige has to take in a breath at the sight of her. Sweat sheens against her tan skin and her gameday braids are falling apart just a little but still, she’s perfect. Before Paige can take a step towards her, there’s another girl, all dark hair and long legs, brushing past her, rushing to get to Azzi’s side. It’s like the world has stopped and yet is spinning too fast all at the same time, as Paige watches this girl, Zoe, pull Azzi, Paige’s Azzi, into her arms. 
After the night of the date (and everything else they’re ignoring), Paige hadn’t bothered to bring it up and Azzi had never said anything about it again. Naively, the blonde had thought that maybe that meant nothing much had transpired after the date, silently patting herself on the back for possibly even having had a hand in that. Except, the way Zoe holds Azzi isn’t fucking platonic and the way Azzi relaxes in Zoe’s arms, isn’t fucking friendly. 
“I”ve got you Az,” Zoe whispers into Azzi’s hair and Paige wants to die. She should look away, she should walk away but her feet seem to be glued to the ground. And she remembers the way Azzi’s eyes were searching the crowd and oh- she’d been looking for- Paige can’t even let herself complete the thought because she’s sure she’ll burst into flames the second she does. 
“I’m really glad you’re here,” Azzi says quietly to Zoe. To Zoe, and not Paige. If she could feel anything beyond the dagger twisting in her heart, maybe Paige would hear the way there’s still a tinge of disappointment in Azzi’s voice, as if she’s wishing it was someone else. 
It takes Zoe pressing a kiss into Azzi’s forehead, eliciting a sigh from the brunette for Paige to finally tear her eyes away. Her feet finally move and then she’s running faster than she has in a long time, ignoring the way it causes her muscle to ache. She can’t tell if her rapid blinking is to usher away the tears or to try and prevent the memory of Azzi with some other girl from welding itself into her eyelids. It blurs her vision and in the speed of things, she can barely tell where she’s going. Paige runs chest-first into a wall, bruising her elbow. Her phone slips out of her hands, falling to the ground with a loud thud, the screen protector cracking into pieces. 
And when Paige looks at the mess of her phone on the floor, she thinks it couldn’t possibly have cracked harder than this silly little stupid heart of hers.
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pandulce135 · 8 months
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Hi hi! Can I ask for Donatello x a fem reader who finds out this normally goofy and bubbly cinnamon roll is actually really smart, but has been hiding it because she's worried that people won't like it? Can either be friends to lovers or established relationship, go wild!
Notes: It's been a month but I finally did it! I really did my best here, I kind of struggled but like, I hope I can get at least a 3.5 stars out of 5 haha. I'm gonna start naming my fics like early 2000's FOB songs starting now.
Warnings: reader labeled as 'stupid' and 'dumb,' acceptance of a negative role, reader looked down upon, not really proofread, lmk if I need to add anything else.
Word Count: 1.8k
~~~~~
So Smart, So Dumb: The Role That Was Given
You bounded into the Lair of your turtle friends. A soft smile was planted on your lips as you made the walk through the dim and, quite frankly, disgusting sewers. Not that you would expect them to be clean by any means. Just a few years ago, you never imagined yourself taking frequent walks through the underground tunnels of trash water to get to your friends. Now you knew these tunnels like the back of your hand, not that you’ve made it all that obvious.
There were subtle things you did that made both your book smarts and street smarts nearly unknown to your friends. Mikey seemed to be the only one to begin to pick up on your small habits. How you always hung around in the middle of the group when walking through the sewers but knowing where each path led, your seemingly limitless questions about Donnie’s tech and the Hidden City, how you even asked questions to no one just to realize you knew the answer all along, and how you knew completely random fun facts. You even Googled a large number of ‘how to’s recently. Sure, there were things here and there that you genuinely didn’t know, but now you had the reputation of ‘pretty and pretty stupid.’
Less work for your brain when in life or death situations. That was arguably the smartest move of all- to work smarter, not harder. You nearly laughed when you thought that.
It may have bordered on manipulation, but what the turtles and April didn’t know won’t hurt them.
It wasn’t long until you finally made it to the Lair. The opening that held the boys’ huge skate ramps and was their general hangout spot held three of the four turtles. You spotted Leo lounging on the beanbag reading a comic, Raph was doing a set bicep curls on his bench, and Mikey was laying on his plastron and doodling away in his sketchbook. The youngest was the first to notice your arrival.
“Hi, Y/N!” He smiled his big goofy smile in your direction, which caused your own smile to grow.
“Hi, guys!” You waved enthusiastically.
“Y/N! What are you doing here?” Raph put down his dumbbell with a grunt before turning to face you.
Leo chuckled, his eyes not moving away from the comic. “They’re obviously here to see Donnie.” The smirk in his voice was as clear as day and you couldn’t help but let out a nervous laugh. Your hands flew to hold onto each other behind your back as you rocked back and forth from your toe to your heel.
“He said he needed help with something he’s working on.”
There was a pause before all three of the turtles in front of you bursted out laughing, halting your movements. You watched as they laughed at the thought of you actually being of use to Donnie. Sure it was an assumption on the situation, but there’s not much else it could be.
They finally finished, each of them wiping away a stray tear. “Hardy har. I’m glad I could be amusing to you boys, but I have to go before Don starts spamming me with texts.” As if on cue, your phone buzzed in your back pocket. You pulled it out and looked down at it. Sure enough, it was him. You faced the screen to the boys. “That’s my cue! Have fun doing… whatever.”
You entered Don’s lab just as another message was sent through to your phone. “Don, I’m here,” you announced with a chuckle, which caused him raise his head from what he was working on on his desk to you.
“I heard you speaking with my brothers, but I needed you here urgently.” He was suddenly standing and moved away to focus on a few pieces of material on the table behind him. Some thick pieces of metal.
“My normal job?”
“Yes, your normal job.”
Your normal job was handing him the tools he asked for. When you first started this for him he assumed you would know nothing about the tools he was working with. He was shocked when you were able to differentiate the phillip screwdriver from the flathead and star. At that point, you had earned the title of ‘the dumb one’ but said you were willing to help him. No one else volunteered so he cut his losses and allowed you to help him.
So, you made your way over to his desk to sit down on his massive chair. You were the only one allowed to sit in it. It was like a reward for helping him out.
“So, whatcha workin’ on?” You asked as you spun around in the chair in half circles, bouncing side to side with the help of your feet as stoppers.
“Oh, only my next big scientific advancement. Once I finish up this bad boy, I’ll be the next Einstein with my own Nobel Prize!” Donnie exclaimed, holding out his hand for a tool. “The drill please.” You spun in your chair to grab the drill off of his desk and set it to the forward option. You pressed the trigger twice quickly to make sure it functioned before handing it to Donnie.
His response didn’t answer your question, so you looked down at the construction drawing on Donnie’s desk. It was for the piece of machinery he seemed to have his mind set on building. It didn’t even have a title. A glance at the materials and measurements made you furrow your eyebrows.
“Don, I don’t think your measurements are right. Are you sure you measured everything correctly?” You asked, not moving your gaze away from the paper. You started working on your own measurements on the sheet of material next to you.
Donnie produced a loud gasp from somewhere behind you. “You dare doubt my measurements?” He sounded utterly shocked and nearly betrayed. “Scoff! When will you learn, I am always precise and correct when it comes to such-”
“You didn’t take into account the actual width of the material in your measurements,” you cut him off to show him the numbers you produced. You noted how his eyebrow twitched and how his stance stiffened as soon as you spoke over him. “Sorry I cut you off, but you probably wouldn’t have let me show you otherwise.”
Upon processing your words, Donnie let out a breath and loosened up. “Fine, let me take a look.” He snatched the papers from your grasp peered down at them. His eyes narrowed at the one with your measurements before widening slightly. “Wait a minute.” With movements so fast you could hardly register them, Donnie grabbed a measuring tape to measure the width of the material. “Holy mackerel, you’re right!”
You laughed at his reaction. “Don’t act so shocked, Don. It was an easy mistake to fix, and an even easier one to make. I’m glad I was able to look it over.”
“You act like you’ve made the same mistake before.”
“Adding measurements together in a workshop environment is difficult sometimes,” you sighed but you shot him a smile anyways. “But you’re doing amazing, sweaty.”
“Oh, shut up.” He couldn’t help but smile at your words. You noticed how you seemed to have such an effect on him. “You’re a lot smarter than you let on.”
“Yeah, that’s the goal.” You laughed as you leaned back in his chair and he furrowed his drawn on eyebrows at you.
“Wait, wait, wait… what?” He dropped what he was working on. “You were just acting stupid this whole time?”
“I have a reputation to uphold. ‘Pretty and pretty dumb,’ right?” You began swinging your feet back and forth. You noticed as Donnie tensed up again. “You guys aren’t able to stay quiet about anything.” You laughed out again, but it was obvious that is was more forced. “Plus, it’s just easier to do as told than come up with any plan in a life or death situation. It wasn’t that I was like, playing you guys or anything. I was just… filling in the role you guys gave me. I think I did a pretty good job.” You gasped. “Oh, I could totally be an actor, what do you think?” You looked at him with raised eyebrows and an expectant gaze.
“What do I think? I think you’ve had plenty of opportunities to show us how smart you are and prove us all wrong! Why on Galileo’s good Earth would you not do that?” Donnie nearly shouted and you frowned. “I, personally, would not stand that!”
“I’m not you, Donnie,” you stated blankly, a firmness taking hold in your voice. Donnie grew physically uneasy. “The reputation stuck. I didn’t want to deal with the aftermath of such a revelation. Especially now. It’s easier to just… let you guys think I’m a silly, goofy idiot.” You ran a hand down your face. “Let’s be honest, it was so much easier for me, the most.”
“Oh…”
“Oh,” you mocked. “It’s such a shocking revelation that I’m decently smart, I know,” a sarcasm seeped its way through your voice as you leaned your elbow on the arm of Donnie’s chair. Your head rested on in your hand. “Let’s just… get back to work on your ‘next big scientific advancement.’” You turned in the chair to face the tools again.
There were a few seconds of silence before he spoke up. “No.” You sat up straight at Donnie’s word.
“What?”
“Let’s do something else.”
You turned around to see the materials that were supposed to be used to create scientific greatness were all discarded on the table that was now behind Donnie. He stood in front of your sitting form and planted both hands on the arms of the chair.
“How about pizza and a movie? My treat.”
You raised an eyebrow as you stared up at Donnie. “Really?” You suddenly smiled. “You sure it’s not just an apology?”
He pulled away from the chair and turned to the the side with his arms crossed over his plastron. “Psh, as if… maybe… it is…n’t.”
“Oh, Donnie!” You gushed as you clasped your hands together, most of your negative emotions left in few seconds of the past. “So you can be thoughtful!”
“Hey, I’ll show you thoughtful!”
“Really?”
“Let’s just go, you dum dum,” Donnie grumbled out with flushed cheeks before pulling you out of the chair and dragging you out of his lab. “And yeah, I guess it’s my way of saying sorry,” he muttered, holding onto your hand with a tight grip as you followed him.
Your soft smile returned to your lips. “Thanks, Don.”
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