#can you tell I'm unravelling and going a bit insane

[springseasonie]

Unravel Me | LHC (M)

Forced proximity, Haechan x fem reader

Summary: Haechan loves chasing you, but you hate it. You've rejected him so many times, but that just makes him come back stronger. One night, he takes it too far, and the both of you end up locked in a tiny room together after trying to set the record straight. You tell him you hate him and would never date him, let alone fuck him, but is that true?

Warnings: sexual content, tiny bit of dubcon elements, dom Haechan, unprotected sex, pull out method, degrading, bit of a pain kink, spanking, choking, pacing is a lil fast in this one, proofread but may still contain errors

Word count: 4,1k

Song recs: unravel me by Sabrina Claudio

A/N: Happy 300 to me!!! I'm already almost at 400 followers already. I really appreciate that you guys like my writing so much so this is for you guys and for me a little too. Hope you enjoy!! Feedback is loved and appreciated 🤍🤍

"Haechan stand up," you said through gritted teeth.

"No, I'm not gonna stand up."

People were staring at the both of you, confused looks all over their faces. Haechan was on his knees in front of you in the middle of a banquet begging you for your attention. He asked you out multiple times on multiple occasions, and you always rejected him. You truly weren't interested and wanted him to move on, but this time he's taken a new low.

"Is he proposing," you hear someone say.

A shiver crawls up your spine, now feeling more panicked than ever. You took him by his collar, lifting him off the ground swiftly. You had a blank look on your face as you took his hand and pulled him out the hall trying to stay calm. Walking out doors to the back of the estate, you let out a frustrated sigh. Your eyes shifted, seeing that the both of you wouldn't be the only people there. Too many people would hear the mouthful you're about to give him.

Haechan followed you with a small smile as you dragged him around the estate. He knew what was about to happen and he loved it every time it did. Every time you told him no, it made him want to go back and try again stronger and harder. You always said you didn't like him and couldn't stand him, but if that was the case why hadn't you blocked his number yet? Why did you keep responding to his messages and flirting? Haechan always felt like you were holding back, so maybe this incident would be the tip of the iceberg.

You were still walking around looking when you noticed the private office of the house was cracked open, without thinking you pulled him into the small space, shutting the door quickly behind the both of you.

"What the fuck is your problem," you spat.

Haechan shrugged, giving you a look of indifference. "You said in order for you to date me, I'd have to get on my knees and beg."

"I didn't mean it literally Haechan! Are you fucking crazy or something," you whisper yelled. "You know what? I tried to be nice, but now you're just completely insane. I don't fucking like you. I don't want to date you. Do you understand the words that are coming out of my mouth?"

Haechan looked at you with a blank face. "I think you're lying."

You squinted at him frustrated, scoffing at his words. "Lying about what?"

"I think you do like me," he protested.

You let out an annoyed groan, throwing your head back. "And why the fuck do you think that?"

"Because you would've blocked my number a long time ago," he started. "You wouldn't have pulled me in here in private to tell me to stop if you didn't like me."

"Well you know what.." you reached for the door knob, grabbing it as you looked at him. "Now I'm gonna leave, so you can be alone." You twisted the knob expecting the door to open, but all you got was nothing. You twisted it again, pulling it harder but it still didn't budge. Panic started to sleep in as you kept repeating the steps over and over with nothing changing.

You were locked in a room with Haechan and no one knew. Not only that but it was on the other side of the estate. You turned to him, being forced to look at his mocking smile. "The door is locked."

"So shouldn't you call someone," he inquired.

"You're right," you sighed. You pulled out your phone and called someone you knew was there, but they didn't pick up. You called again, but the same thing happened. The third time you called, the call was immediately dropped. You pulled the phone from your ear, looking at the top corner. You had no bars and you were pretty sure he knew this.

"You let me drag you over here knowing I would have no service," you grumbled. "You're evil."

"I'm not evil. I just let you act freely," he claimed. Haechan stood in front of you with the most smug expression you've seen yet. His hands were in his pockets, leaning on the door frame that the both of you stood in front of. You glanced at his neck, realizing that he never fixed his collar that you messed up when you dragged him off the floor.

Just then is when you realized how small the room was. It was a bit dark, the only thing illuminating the room was the moon light and the small desk lamp that was on. You watched him as he loosened his tie and unbuttoned his shirt a bit, gulping at the sudden action.

"Well we're probably gonna be in here a while so we might as well get comfortable right?"

"Whatever," you grumbled. You walked to the chair in the corner of the room sitting in it and crossing your legs. He was right, the two of you were gonna be in that small, stuffy, dark room for a bit so there was no need to keep your heels on either. Quickly, you kick them off your feet, sighing at the relief you were given.

Haechan sat on the desk, leaning on his arms that were now being him. You wanted to pretend to be busy on your phone or something, but there was no use when you couldn't even use it, so now you were forced to sit there with your arms crossed staring at a wall.

"You know you can talk to me right? We don't have to sit here in silence."

You scoffed, turning your body away from him in the seat. "I don't wanna talk to you."

Haechan laughed softly, licking his lips as his eyes scanned over your body. He loved messing with you, getting you angry just to curse at him. You always held yourself in so much regard, never getting angry or losing your cool with most people. But for some reason he bought those feelings out of you, even in places like this.

You had to stop letting him get you angry, and you were going to stop it for once and for all in this very room.

-

It had been about 2 hours already and you were sure no one was looking for you both. You haven't even heard any noise from outside the door and it was already 11:30. You were beginning to think that you'd be there till the morning. But even if that was true, you still wouldn't say anything to Haechan.

He figured out the game you were playing when you wouldn't respond to him after a while, leaving him to talk to himself. You were really stubborn and he knew that, but he didn't think you would be this bad. But even when you were mad at him he couldn't get the thought of all the things he could do to you in the room. Take you and fuck you over the desk. Or rip your dress off and fuck you against the window. Maybe he could just spread your legs in the chair you were sitting and just eat you out like there was no tomorrow. Your legs did look good in the dress.

"Can you stop staring at me?" That was the first thing you said to him in a while, the annoyed look forever stuck in your face.

"I'm sorry, you just look really good tonight." Haechan smiles to himself seeing how obviously off put you were by the sudden compliment. "You're not good at hiding your facial expressions."

"Stop talking to me."

"As if you want me to stop talking," he replied, giving you a dry laugh. You shot him a glare, but he looked so good at that moment. You don't know how, but his hair was a bit disheveled and looked like he unbuttoned his shirt a bit more.

You wanted to say something but you couldn't. He had a response for everything. You couldn't stand it. You couldn't stand his witty mind or how he laughed at you. You couldn't stand how he would smile at your anger or lick his lips every time he saw you. The way he would tease you just to make you squirm. You couldn't stand the way his hands would brush against yours sometimes. Sometimes you wanted his hands on you, sometimes you wanted his soft lips on yours. You wanted his body against yours, holding you tight as if he would lose you.

Haechan was so observant, and for some reason you forgot this when you crossed your legs and squeezed them tight. His eyes went from your face to your legs quickly. "What was that about?"

"What? I can't cross my legs now," you snapped. You responded a little bit too quickly, almost like you were caught doing something you weren't supposed to. You looked over at him, breath hitching when you see the way he was sitting now. His legs were open leaning back on one hand while the other was ghosting over his zipper.

"If you wanna fuck me all you have to do is ask."

"Oh please, I would never in a million years fuck you," you said rolling your eyes.

"Well it's looking like you want to right now," he snickered. "We wouldn't have to beat around the bush if you weren't so uptight."

Something in you snapped when you heard the word uptight. You stood up, walking to him with anger. You stood directly between his legs, a scowl overtaking your lips. "I am not uptight. I've worked too hard and too much to ever let myself be called uptight by anyone, especially a man child like you."

Haechan tilted his head, lids dropping as he glanced at your glossed lips. "Don't you ever get lonely," he asked out of the blue.

"What are you talking about?"

"You aren't good at hiding your emotions," he pointed out. "I saw you staring at all the other couples earlier. I know you're lonely."

"I am not lonely," you argue. "I'm perfectly fine by myself, thank you very much."

He raised a brow, not believing your words for one second. "When was the last time someone touched you?"

"W-why do you care?" You didn't mean to stutter, but the mere thought of it was actually starting to drive you insane. It's been a long time. You never meant for it to happen that way, it's just been because of work and family drama that you haven't really been able to find anyone. You've just been so tired and exhausted, sometimes you couldn't even be bothered to touch yourself.

Haechan couldn't take it anymore, being so close to you and you still pretending you didn't want him. He put his hands on your waist, pulling you closer to him and the desk.

"Haechan stop," you said, shocked. You uncrossed your arms, pushing at his chest to get out his grasp, but he wasn't budging. You gulped, the feeling of his soft hands on your skin showing in the cutouts of the dress making your head spin. And he smelled so good, did he always smell this good? Maybe it was the lack of sexual attention, but you were starting to lose your mind right about now.

"You don't really want me to stop do you?" His quiet, warm, nothing like the usual mocking he took with you. It made you wet, and you didn't like that. His hands moved to your lower back, rubbing circles on your body.

Your heart was beating out your chest at this point and you just kept getting wetter and wetter with the way he was talking to you, looking at you, just being near him was enough. You didn't realize how touch deprived you had been, but now you're too deep to get out. Your mouth went dry trying to fish the words out your head. For the first time in your life, you're completely speechless.

"I'll take that as a no." Haechan moved his hands back to your sides, raising them ever so slowly till his thumbs brushed the underside of your chest. "I can feel your heart beating. Fuck that's hot."

You stood there completely still letting him touch you. He was so close to you, you could feel his breath on your skin. You couldn't help but let your eyes flicker to his lips, they were so pretty and plump, and probably really soft.

"You wanna kiss me don't you," he whispered, leaning into you. His mouth hovered over yours the perfect amount, lips brushing over yours lightly. "It's okay, just admit it Y/N. You wanna kiss me. You wanna fuck me."

Gulping, you shook your head, but Haechan was quick to see how your brows furrowed. "No.."

"I bet you wore this pretty dress just for me didn't you," he accused, laughing dryly when you scoffed. Haechan trailed his hands down your body again going directly to your ass, gripping it hard, but not too rough. "You want me to tell you what I want right now?"

"If you were man enough, you'd just do it." You were completely caught off guard when he planted a firm smack to your ass smiling and biting his lip. You let out a gasp, fingers taking a soft hold of his shirt. "H-haechan, don't do that," you stuttered. You wanted to not like it, but you did. You liked it a lot and you wanted him to do it again. At that moment, you just happened to look down and see that he was fully hard, straining against his pants.

"You talk too much," he mumbled. He was breathing heavily, taking every bit of energy in his body to restrain himself from jumping off the desk and bending you over.

"Shut me up."

Haechan wasted no time capturing your lips on his in a heated, messy kiss. Your hands flew to his face, holding it as you kissed him deeply. He still tasted like the whiskey he was drinking earlier and his lips are softer than you imagined. The little moans that left your mouth made him dizzy. He always thought of this moment, always feeling like it would be a bit anticlimactic, but he was so wrong.

Haechan moved you back a bit, lips still on yours as he hopped off the desk and spun you around. He pressed his body against yours, fingers traveling up the slit in your dress. "Are you kidding," he said against your lips, smirking to himself. "You're not even wearing shorts under this. Fuck, you drive me crazy."

He slips his hand between your legs, parting lips with you when he feels exactly how wet you are. "Fuck babe is literally down your legs."

You hide your face in his neck from embarrassment. He affects you too easily and all you had to do was hide it till someone could find the both of you. But here you were, kissing him, letting him touch you.

"Nuh uh, look at me," he said gently, making you face him. He pulled his fingers from under your dress, your arousal making them glisten in the low light. "So this is what I do to you hm? And you said you'd never fuck me."

"Shut up," you whined softly. "You're so annoying."

"I can't be as annoying as this pussy aching to be fucked, can I?" He put his fingers up to your mouth, looking at you like he was about to pounce. "Suck it."

"What? No," you refused, shaking your head slightly.

"Suck. It."

Haechan's tone suddenly changed, going from teasing and soft to demanding. You stopped talking and licked his fingers, wrapping your lips around them tasting yourself in your tongue. And if you didn't know any better, you'd say the look you were giving him right about now could make him cum alone.

"That's it," he cooed. "That's a good girl." Heat rushed to you when he took his fingers out your mouth, looking away to avoid his hungry gaze. Haechan let out a chuckle, kissing you softly. "Now let's get this dress out the way hm?" Haechan turned you around gently, unzipping the back of your dress. You let the silk fall off your body, and pool at your feet.

All too quickly, he bent you over the desk, making you gasp in shock. Just when you were about to say something, you felt a hard smack on your ass. "Fuck," you choked out through gritted teeth.

"That's for saying no the first time."

Smack.

"That's for the second time."

Smack.

The list kept going and going, some smacks harder than the next. You completely forgot where you were at the point, moans and groans becoming louder with each hit. You were sure you weren't gonna be able to sit without feeling pain for a bit.

"God you're enjoying this aren't you," he chuckled darkly. "you're so wet, it's dripping all over the floor. I should make you lick it up."

Panicked, you shook your head fast. "N-no."

"It's okay I wouldn't do that to you. Yet." He moves down your spine with his fingers, snapping your bra against your skin making you whine softly. "God, you're really loving this aren't you."

You started hearing the clink of him undoing his belt, the sound making you both nervous and excited. You needed this so badly, you were so sensitive, any touch, sound, taste would probably send you over the edge. You were pretty sure you were going to cum if he kept spanking you.

Haechan quickly pulled himself out of his pants quickly, cock already dripping with precum. "Now you tell me. Should I just fuck you or should I make you wait like you made me?"

"Haechan please, just fuck me," you whispered breathlessly. You absolutely hated begging for anything. It was so embarrassing that you went from yelling at him and demanding him to now pleading for him to be inside you.

"I wonder what all those people out there would say if they saw you like this." He rubbed his tip against your core, pushing it against your panties teasingly. You arched you back against him, wanting to feel more of him. "You're like a bitch in heat. Fuck Y/N, you needed this for a long time didn't you?"

You nodded fast, pressing your legs together for some pressure. "Please Haechan just give it to me already."

"Since you asked so nicely.." Haechan ripped your panties to your ankles, eyes never leaving the absolute mess between your legs. Pressing his tip on your entrance, he held your hip tight. Slowly, he pushed himself into you letting you feel the stretch you long needed. And at that moment, a look of surprise spread across his face when you let out a loud shaky whimper fluttering around him.

"Did you just cum," he said, mocking tone lacing his voice.

"I-I couldn't help it," you said, voice muffled on the table. You wanted to say something else, but was cut off by the feeling of him thrusting into you slowly. With each movement, you let out a choked moan. He thrusted so deep into you, you could feel every inch of him. The feeling was so intoxicating that you started to move your hips at the same time as him.

"Good girl," he grunted lowly. "Fuck that pretty pussy on this cock."

Your moans filled the room, the constant whimpers jumping off the walls back into your ears. Haechan took your arms and pinned them to your back when he started to fuck you faster. Your face was pressed on the smooth wooden desk practically drooling. You jumped feeling him plant a hard smack on your ass. "F-fuck!"

"You like that?"

"Mhm," you whimpered, hissing at the feeling of another smack. Haechan smacked your ass again, pounding into you hard. Your skin pinched slightly against the edge of the desk, but the pain mixed with the pleasure made your eyes roll back. "Haechan, I-I'm gonna cum."

"No you're not," he growled. Haechan pulled out of you and lifted your body off the desk. Haechan turned you around, lifting you and sitting your body on the wood. He pushed your body down looking at the mess he made of you. Your makeup was a mess, drool and small tears painting your cheeks. In his eyes, you were an absolute dream. So pretty, messy, weak, submissive and it was all for him.

Haechan swiftly pulled your hips off the edge of the desk, making you groan quietly. He lined himself back with your core, pushing himself in you and bottoming out. Haechan gave you no time to make sense of the change in position, fucking into you quick and hard.

"Haechan," you whined loudly, wrapping your legs around his waist. You were intoxicated in his touch, eyes practically rolling to the back of your head when his hand rubbed up your body and around your neck.

"These are in the way," he mumbled, a grin spreading on his lips. And with that, he ripped the pearl necklace off your neck, the sound of the tiny expensive balls hitting the ground all around the both of you.

"That..that was expensive," you moaned breathlessly, brows furrowing at the pressure around your neck.

"Don't worry babe I can buy another one." He squeezed your neck the right amount almost as if he knew it was perfect. Your hands flew to his wrist, squeezing it as you stared up at him lost in the feeling of him filling you up.

"I'm gonna cum," you whimpered breathlessly.

"Cum. Cum for me Y/N," he grunted, slamming into you. "Fuck I'm so close." He took his hand on your neck, plunging it between your legs, rubbing your neglected clit fast.

You were so fucked out of your mind, so sensitive to the point where you couldn't even form a coherent sentence. All you could do is reach up and make grabby hands to communicate with him, and luckily for you, he understood. Haechan leaned down, kissing you messily and passionately. You held onto his shirt, your grip so strong he was afraid you'd pop a button.

"Haechan, I…I" You came around him with a loud high pitched whine, core squeezing around him right. Your ankles locked around his waist, not letting him go until you calm down from your high. Once your grip weakened, he pulled out of you quickly making you whine at the loss of him. Haechan stroked himself quickly above your limp tired body.

"Shit." He came on your stomach, the white fluid sticking to your lace lingerie painting your pretty skin.

The both of you stayed where you were for a minute allowing yourselves to catch your breaths. That's when it dawned on you that you just fucked Haechan, the one person you said you would never fuck. But you didn't feel bad about it or even embarrassed. In fact, you waited for the moment for a long time.

Haechan broke your deep thoughts patting your cheek to get your attention. "You okay down there?"

"Why wouldn't I be," you huffed, sitting up on your elbows weakly. You watched Haechan eye your body, jaw clenching when he got to the mess on your stomach.

"I wanna put a baby in you so badly," he mumbled.

"Okay, that's moving pretty fast," you laughed softly. "I can't believe we just did that."

"It was bound to happen." Haechan whipped the sweat off his brow, pushing his already messy hair back. "I always thought about how this moment would happen."

"Of course you did. That's probably all you could think about for the past couple of months," you snickered.

"You say that like you didn't have wet dreams about me and probably thought about me when you-"

"Okay, okay. You win" you said quietly accepting defeat. "It's so..hot in here."

"Do you think the window will open?"

"I don't know. Give it a try."

Haechan fixed himself up quickly and walked to the window. He placed his hands on the underside of the window, not thinking that it would open at all due to how old the house was, but to his and your surprise, it did.

"Are you fucking kidding me," you groaned softly.

"Don't be mad. At least you got some dick out of this," he teased.

"Shut up and just help me get dressed."

"If I help you, will you go on a date with me?"

"If I agree, will you stop being annoying and never talk about this again?"

"Can't make any promises to that, but I can promise to buy you a new necklace."

"Then we have a deal."

#nct #nct u #nct fanfic #nct dream #nct smut #nct x reader #nct oneshot #nct 127 #nct scenarios #nct haechan #haechan #haechan fanfic #haechan scenarios #haechan smut #haechan imagines #haechan drabbles #nct dream smut #nct dream scenarios #nct dream fanfic #nct 127 smut #nct 127 scenarios #nct 127 imagines

[babybluebex]

Hi! Congrats on 13k that’s insane!! I have an angsty Eddie idea. I know people tend to headcanon that is Mother is dead. But what if she just left when he was little? Could we please please pleaseee see what would happen if adult Eddie had to find out that she was happy with another family?

UNLUCKY 13 ANGST NIGHT omg yes this is gonna be good

When you walked into the trailer that afternoon, loaded down with the required groceries to make dinner, you didn't expect to see Eddie sitting on the couch, head in his hands, sobbing heavily. Eddie was pretty open with his emotions and he cried every so often (most recently, watching an old VHS of Dumbo), but he never sobbed.

"Eddie!" you gasped, dropping the plastic shopping bags and going to him, dropping to your knees in front of him and grabbing his hands. "What's wrong? Are you hurt?"

Eddie sniffled, and he pulled his hands away from his face to expose his red cheeks and watery eyes. His lips were pouted out as he sobbed again, and he wordlessly grabbed a bit of crumpled paper next to him and shoved it into your hands. "Baby, what is this?" you asked, slowly unraveling the paper, and you saw a pit of printer paper with neat pen scrawl on it. Some of the ink was smudged from Eddie's tears, and you took a moment to read the contents of it.

The letter detailed a recent trip to New York City that the writer had taken, talking about everything they did and saw, and they spent a lot of time discussing what "Jim and David" did. The end of the letter implored Eddie to write back before signing off "I love you, baby, Loretta".

"Eddie, who is this?" you asked slowly. "Who's Loretta?"

"My mom," Eddie said, his voice watery. "She— She left when I was little, left me alone with my dad, and... And look! She's so happy!"

"Oh, Eds," you mumbled. "Baby, who's Jim and David?"

"My stepdad," Eddie said. "Her new husband. And Dave is my brother— half brother. He's 13. She found someone new, she replaced us, she replaced me. And she's so much happier with them than she ever was with us."

"Babe," you whispered. Eddie's voice was full of a venom that you had never heard from him before; he never spoke about his mother, and you assumed that maybe she had passed away with the infrequent amount he talked about her, but this proved that she was alive and well. "I'm so sorry."

"Whatever," Eddie mumbled, wiping his face with his hand. "Fuck her, I'm perfectly happy without her. I have you and Wayne and Hellfire, I have everything I need."

You sighed softly, and you touched his knee, setting the letter aside. "It's okay for you to want a mom, though," you told him. "To want a mom who's there for you."

"Yeah," Eddie said. "It just hurts because... She was my mom first and I feel like she forgets about me until it's convenient. Like I'm nothing but a mistake but, the moment she can brag about something and show off how good things are, I'm the first one she tells."

"That's cruel," you said. "Why do you still talk to her if she treats you like this?"

"I don't," Eddie said. "I haven't answered her letters in years but she keeps sending them. And I'm stupid and I keep reading them, even though I know it'll hurt. Last month, it was 'Oh, Jim got a promotion' and before that 'Dave was top of his class'. They're everything that my dad and I weren't, everything that Wayne and I aren't, and I just... She's a bitch. Plain and simple."

You got up on the couch and sat close to Eddie, and you cradled his head to your chest and let him cry into you. "It'll be okay, baby," you told him. "Listen, we can, like, burn this or whatever you want, okay? Fuck her; she doesn't deserve to know someone as wonderful as you anyway."

#bex answers #anon ask #bex's drabbles #eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #joseph quinn #joseph quinn x reader

[nancys4gf]

hating you is easier | jonathan byers

summary: you and jonathan work together to expose the lab. even though you hate each other.

pairing: jonathan byers x gender neutral reader

warnings: none

note: today i offer you.... friends to strangers to enemies to lovers jonathan.. + our favorite matchmaker: murray. i had so much fun writing this. i hope you enjoy!!! <3 ps. that gif??? i'm so in love with him.

̟ ̇.˚︵‿୨♡୧‿︵˚.✩

“you can’t drive.”

“i haven’t drank that much.”

“i’m not getting in that car.”

“well, i’m not letting you drive.”

“do what you want.” you concluded. “i’ll stay here.”

jonathan let out a sigh. he knew he couldn’t leave you here on your own, no matter how much you irritated him. 

he turned to murray, who was curiously watching the scene, and said,

“we’ll stay.”

“okay, i’m confused.” he spoke. “what’s going on here? a lovers’ quarrel?”

“please,” you choked back a laugh. “no, no love going on here.”

murray raised an eyebrow. “how come?”

“we don’t…” jonathan started, casting a glance at you. “really get along.”

“ha!” murray exclaimed, startling both of you. “yet you’re here together because…?”

“we have shared interests.” you replied. 

“shared interests, alright,” he nodded, smirking. “correct me if i’m wrong but, you were the one who went to jonathan for help, right?”

“yeah…” you said, unsure of where murray was getting at.

“why?” 

“i don’t know.” 

“well, there must be a reason why you asked him for help. instead of asking anyone else.” 

realizing murray was genuinely waiting for an answer, you opened your mouth and closed it a couple times. until you finally said the only thing you could think of: the truth.  

“he’s the only one who understands.”

murray looked satisfied, his face practically glowing with a ‘bingo!’ sign. you felt jonathan’s gaze on you, but you didn’t look at him. 

“tell me, you used to be friends, didn’t you?”

“how…?” the question died in jonathan’s mouth, agape with surprise.

“what happened?” murray continued, his excitement growing more and more as he unraveled the mystery. “you broke his heart?” staring at your blank expression, he narrowed his eyes and tried, “he broke your heart?”

“we grew apart. it happens. it’s normal.”

jonathan scoffed, and you turned to him abruptly.

“what? what’s wrong about what i just said, jonathan? tell me.”

“nothing,” he shrugged, and you were so focused on him that you didn’t notice murray cackling to himself, as he watched everything fall into place like dominoes. “you just make it sound as if nothing happened.”

“nothing did.”

your heart was racing and your face felt as if it was burning, the same way it always did when jonathan worked you up like this. murray suddenly stood up from the chair, clearing his throat and breaking the tension.

“well, unfortunately, there’s only the bed in the guest room. but if you find each other’s presence so unbearable, one of you can always sleep in the bathtub.”

he gave you a big, snarky grin, and started walking up the stairs. 

“for what is worth,” he continued, stirring the bottle of vodka. “i don’t think you two hate each other. i think it’s quite the opposite, actually.”

jonathan and you looked at each other. if there was one thing you both knew was that murray was insane, and that it was going to be a long night. 

— ❀ —

“you’re taking up all the sheets, jeez.” you protested, kicking jonathan under the covers.

“and you’re taking up the whole bed.”

“come on.” you groaned.

“i’m almost falling, see?” 

you rolled your eyes, knowing very well that he was exaggerating. but you still moved a bit to your side. the bed was already small, and you would gladly fall over the edge if it meant you wouldn’t feel his body against yours. 

“happy?”

“euphoric.” he replied sarcastically.

“you know, he’s full of shit.” you stated, lying on your back, staring at the ceiling. “he does have another bed.”

“what?”

“mhm. he just wants to feed his weird fantasy of us sleeping together.”

jonathan scoffed. “it’s incredible. you always think the worst of people. you think the whole world revolves around you. but really, he probably couldn’t care less about us.”

“and you’re so naive.” you said, deciding you didn’t have the energy to think up a more elaborate insult. “you could’ve taken the couch.”

“you take the couch.”

you crossed your arms over your chest. “who does he think he is? prying into our lives like that.” 

“he’s wasted.” he said simply. “but he did help.”

“yeah…” you whispered, hesitant to admit that jonathan was right. “yeah, i guess he did.”

“it was a good idea,” he cleared his throat. “watering down the story.”

“yeah.” you agreed, a smile creeping up on your face. 

you had been the one who had had the idea of attenuating the lab's exposé. and even though jonathan wasn’t directly giving you credit for it, he was still praising something you had been responsible for. 

and maybe that, along with the fact that you were sharing a bed at a stranger’s house, was just the little push you needed to say something that you would never have said otherwise. 

“we’ve never talked about it.” 

“about what?”

“come on, jonathan,” you looked at him tiredly. “you know what i mean.”

he gazed back at you. you were used to all the various looks jonathan gave you, but you had some trouble deciphering this particular one. 

“there’s nothing to talk about.”

“oh, there isn’t?” 

“no.”

you were really trying to talk to him, making an effort not to react. but it seemed as if his sole purpose was getting on your nerves. 

“so we kiss, and then we go on like nothing happened, pretending like we hate each other, but there’s nothing to talk about?”

“i’m not pretending.”

you let out an unbelieving scoff, turning away. you could hear his breathing, an aggravating reminder that he really was there, instead of simply being a torturous figment of your imagination. you shut your eyes furiously, determined to ignore the body lying next to you and fall asleep. 

it was easy to be angry at jonathan. anger felt safe, anger was fuel, a cage you could always lock yourself in whenever the outside world got too scary. if you hadn’t been feeling angry right now, you’d be feeling ashamed. ashamed that you had admitted something you shouldn’t have. ashamed that you felt something he didn't correspond.

at some point, you felt the mattress move underneath you. jonathan turned on his side as well, staring at your back. 

“i’ve thought about it.”

even though there was a small space separating your bodies, you could feel his breath against your bare back, and the warmth radiating from his chest.

“what have you thought about?” you whispered. if you spoke quietly enough, maybe he wouldn’t hear you. maybe you could build your walls up again.

“i don’t hate you.” 

those words were enough to make your heart skip a beat. you turned, now facing jonathan.

“i never did. but it was just… easier, i guess.” he confessed. “we grew apart. you started hanging out with the popular kids and i kept to myself even more. i saw you become this person that i didn’t know, and i…” he sighed. “i was jealous. angry. i had no reason to be, but i was. i thought we’d be friends forever, you know? and then we weren’t.”

you hesitated. you had been brave enough to come to a sketchy reporter’s house in order to expose a group of important people who were capable of ruining your life. but you weren’t sure if you were brave enough to say what you’ve always wanted to say.

“when we kissed at that stupid party, i thought things were gonna change between us. for the better.” even though your body was aching for you to look away, you didn’t. the conversation felt weak and vulnerable, but jonathan’s gaze made you feel strong.

“i know things were already different between us. but when we were together, it felt like old times. i realized that you hadn’t changed as much as i thought you had. i realized i hadn’t changed as much as i thought i had.”

jonathan attentively listened to every word, to the sound of your voice. he didn’t want to only hear what you were saying. he wanted to understand. he wanted to know what you had been feeling when he had been longing for you, as well.

“but then… you ignored me at school,” you whispered, remembering how your entire world had crumbled down one winter morning. “and you said we should’ve never kissed.” 

“i never should’ve said that.” he spoke quietly, his eyes full of regret. 

“why did you?”

“i don’t know.” he sighed. “i think i got scared. scared of what would happen.”

“but what could have happened?” you insisted. “what’s so bad about change?”

his hand twiched against his side, overcome by the strong impulse to move the strand of hair that had fallen on your face. but he pulled back. 

“we could’ve figured it out together. we’ve always been a good team.” you said as you fixed your hair.

in the faint light, jonathan thought you looked so much like the person he’d use to have sleepovers with when he was younger. you’d always end up sleeping together, the extra mattress long forgotten. he remembered he always used to reach for you, without giving it a second thought. but now, it wasn’t as easy. 

“and now we’re here.” he stated.

“now we’re here.” you repeated. “i knew i couldn’t do this alone. i also knew no one would believe me. but you did.”

little did he knew, you were also thinking about the time you had once shared. a great part of your life had had jonathan in it, and when he hadn't been there, you had felt as if you were living a life that wasn’t yours.

“you did.” you said again. “you always do.”

and i always will, jonathan wanted to say. but instead, it came out as,

“is it… too late to figure it out now?”

jonathan had faced a lot of change in his life, so he tended to keep away from it. as long as things stayed the same, he was safe. but now, seeing the way your face brightened up and your eyes seemed to spark with hope, he wanted to try. for you. with you.

“you tell me.” you said, wanting, wishing that he wanted the same thing you did.

he glanced at your lips, and your breath caught in your throat. never taking your eyes off his, you leaned in. not too much, but just enough. time seemed to slow down during those few seconds while you waited for him to do something, until he finally leaned in too, wordlessly telling you that you were both on the same page. you’d always had been.

“hating you is so much easier.” he whispered, lingering over your lips. his breath against your face was warm, and you couldn’t help the eager pounding of your heart, anticipating what was about to happen.

“but it’s not exactly true, is it?”

his lips were brushing yours now, your body tingling all over.

“no,” he mumbled, hands cupping your face. “it’s not.”

as soon as his mouth was on yours, you completely melted in his touch, all fear and tension disappearing as you let yourself be held by him. his hands were warm against your face, and you wished he’d never let go.

it wasn’t your first kiss. you two had already shared a shy, drunk kiss at one of steve harrington’s parties. yet this kiss was tentative and just as timid. the story you two shared hung in the air like night stars, new constellations arising as the story moved forward.

your hands found jonathan’s waist under the covers, gripping his shirt so you had something to hold on to. he pulled you even closer to him, and he was burning, and you were burning, and you felt as if the whole room was on fire. 

but you didn’t care, you couldn't care about anything else, because no matter how much time had passed, jonathan always felt right. coming back to him was like finding your way back home after getting lost in the woods.

and even though he’d claim you bring out the best in him, you’d argue that it's actually the other way around.

jonathan’s hands moved about your hair and face, wanting to touch every single part of you. after what felt like hours, but not enough time, you both pulled away, catching your breaths.

he stared at you, a wide grin illuminating his face. he was the reason for your flushed cheeks and disheveled hair. and he loved it. he wanted to run his hands through your hair until it became even messier, only to fix it back into place.

“what?” you said softly, gazing up at him. “what are you thinking about?” 

jonathan held your face, caressing your cheeks with his thumbs.

“he definitely lied about the bed.”

you let out a loud laugh, shaking your head as you wrapped your hands around his neck, pulling him in for another kiss.

#jonathan byers #jonathan byers imagines #jonathan byers au #jonathan byers x reader #jonathan byers fluff #jonathan byers angst #jonathan byers fanfiction #stranger things #stranger things imagines #stranger things au #stranger things x reader #stranger things fluff #stranger things angst #stranger things x gender neutral reader #jonathan byers x gender neutral reader #murray #murray stranger things #enemies to lovers #friends to lovers #there's only one bed

[strelitzia-mystery1097]

The Amazing Digital Circus: Human Games

So I want to throw my hat into the ring of TADC AUs so... here's the start of an idea. Please tell me know if you like this! ^-^

Pomni pulled at her jester hat as she spiralled. This place was breaking her. Day after day after day after day. She's already lost so much to this damned digital circus and yet it still takes more and more from her until she abstracts.

The only remotely good thing that came out of this was her friends(?) that try to help in their own ways. Ragatha somehow didn't hate her after she left her for dead at the abstracted Kaufmo's hands (well he didn't really have hands but that's not the point). Instead she's the first to ask Pomni how's she's feeling. Gangle has been showing Pomni her art and excitingly explain about her favourite animes. Zooble lets Pomni chill out in their room when Pomni needs space to keep an eye on her. Kinger has invited Pomni on bug collecting adventures and occasionally a game of chess. Even f#&%ing Caine and Bubble have tried to be accommodating in their terrible but earnest way.

There is just one person who gets on everyone's nerves, including hers.

"Hey Jester, you mind jesting me?"

Pomni looked up to see the lanky rabbit learing over her. Jax was smirking and looking down on her as she's hunched into a ball near the stage. Everyone else is off doing their own thing so it's just them here.

"Can you just leave me alone for once?" Pomni asked as she lookedat her knees.

"And miss one of your entertaining spirals? I don't think so Pom-pom."

...

"Ha... ha ha... hahahahahahaha. HAHAHA... HA... I get it now." Pomni giggled as her mind unravelled slightly.

"Oh?"

Pomni stood up and looked at Jax with hateful pity.

"I'm fine with doing whatever. As long as I get to see funny things happen to people, that's what you said the day we met."

"Yeah? Congrats on remembering but I'm not following your blatant insanity." Jax said as he leaned back and tilted his head, curious.

"You need us. You would break without us."

Jax looked confused before he started laughing.

"Pfft! You really have lost your marbles! I don't need you nutcases for anything."

"You don't like Caine's games. Be being awful and seeing our reactions you stay sane. By causing real reactions from real people you become real."

"Isn't that a bit dramatic? If you're abstracting then can you buzz off because I don't want to deal with that."

"..." Pomni ignored him and just smiled with scribbled out eyes.

"Welp, enjoy your raging insanity. I'll go find someone more funny than you clown." Jax said as he walked away.

When Jax left Pomni had an idea.

"Would it be a bad thing to get Jax off of his f#&%ing high horse?... Nah."

Once Pomni had a clever idea she went to find Caine.

After calling out his name three times Pomni found Caine behind the curtains of the stage with Bubble.

"Ah! Hello Pomni! How is your permanent stay going?" Caine asked.

"It's... fine. Caine, can we talk? I have an idea for an adventure. "

"Of course Pomni! I'm all ears!"

"Not really. You're all eyes-" Bubble said before Caine popped Bubble.

"Yeah... so you are aware that Jax doesn't find your adventures very fun, right?"

"I... am aware of it. He gets quite bored or even destructive when he participates at times. You humans are quite confusing with how differently you all respond to my adventures."

"Well... I got something I want to try out that Jax might like."

"Gazooks! Pomni I haven't seen you be so invested in any of my adventures like this before! Now I'm dying to know what your amazing idea is!"

"Well, I think Jax is probably missing being human, so why don't we play some... human games. Let me explain..."

And that is it for now. Thank you for reading!

#tadc #tadc pomni #tadc jax #tadc caine #the amazing digital circus #the amazing digital circus pomni #the amazing digital circus jax #the amazing digital circus caine #human games AU #tadc bubble #tadc au

[kayfbopt-learner]

House of Leaves liveblog

Hello internet, at my brother's suggestion I'm going to attempt some liveblogging of the ergodic horror novel House of Leaves. I'm not an avid reader and I usually don't get all the way through the books I read, but this one has caught my interest. So I'm going to take a crack at writing some of my thoughts down as I read. Maybe it'll help me stay motivated to read as well.

40 pages in, I'm hooked. I feel like I'm reading an academic article (Zampanò) interspersed with some random guy's (Truant's) mad ramblings, driven insane by this horror beyond our comprehension that he just happened to stumble across. Their writing style couldn't be any more distinct. Danielewski distinguishes them by using different fonts, but it would probably be possible to tell who's speaking without this (I still think the font-switching is a good literary device though).

So far the main narrative of the story has only progressed a little bit and not much has happened yet that's truly scary (the standouts being the cliffhanger at the end of chapter 4 and Truant's...vision? hallucination? at the tattoo shop). Equally as unsettling is the foreshadowing peppered throughout these early pages, by both Zampanò and Truant. They both let you know that something horrible is going to happen in this house.

I think it's interesting how Zampanò's sections manage to tell an actual story while retaining his academic tone. Already you can tell that this book is not just about a scary house. There are relationships and family tensions and people dealing with personal and professional problems. I'm looking forward to seeing this develop alongside the house continuing to grow more...unnatural? malevolent? I'll have better adjectives to use when more of the house's horror is unraveled.

#house of leaves #books #horror

[iced-coffeebean]

Had this sitting in my drafts for a hot second and I'm bored while I wait for the college week to end soooooooo I decided to work on this <3 _______ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘɪᴄᴋ ᴜᴘ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴜʀʀᴇɴᴛ ᴍᴜꜱᴇ(ꜱ) ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ?

-

I'm not really sure tbh.

I've been in the Hetalia fandom since for a good while now but I never really gave the micronations a second thought. But as of recently, I've just been SO intrigued by them.

I got attached to Molossia cause he's a micronation in Nevada and I'm a Nevadan so I guess close proximity to him geographically??

I figured, "You know, since he's a micronation from my state, I should probably put in an effort to try to get to know him." So I began to do a bunch of research and stuff and I eventually started vibin with his character and then I was just "...Jesus christ, we are practically twins-"

Slowjamastan is another muse of mine because of his connection with Molossia. His possible backstory and upbringing is also just a really interesting thing to unravel so. He is in the brain at all times too ❗️❗️❗️

He's a relatively new character but he's already managed to snatch my heart <3

ɪꜱ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ʟɪᴋᴇ ᴛᴏ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇ?

-

Anything I just don't really vibe with or that makes me uncomfortable. Usually, dead dove items unless I'm going INSANE and I want to emotionally wreck people but yk.

If you really want to know, you'd probably have to ask me 1 on 1 and I'd tell you. Just tell me your list and I'll tell you if I wouldn't vibe with it or not.

I also don't really like Russia all that much so I try to avoid writing him or mentioning him if possible. It's probably the Latvia kinnie in me but Russia gives me the ICK and Russia enjoyers also seem to spook me just a bit. Usually the people I've been around that like him don't end up being the best of lads so... Sorry </3

I'm also not a big fan of horror so, don't expect that much from me either </3

ɪꜱ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ʀᴇᴀʟʟʏ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏ ᴡʀɪᴛɪɴɢ?

-

I'm not really sure tbh. I like the aspect of building out a character is possible and seeing them go through changes and such.

I really like writing AUs for things.

I also love writing Molossia and his relationships/interactions with other micronations, Slowjamastan in specific.

I'm slowly opening up to Ladonia and he already has a lot of canon interactions with him and even seems to be on really good terms with him so that I'm taking that and running with it.

I love werewolf AUs SO MUCH but I haven't yet to write one. Hopefully one day <3

ʜᴏᴡ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴜᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʜᴇᴀᴅᴄᴀɴᴏɴꜱ?

-

They come to me in dreams-/j

Joking joking but tbh, I just exist tbh and they come to me.

I normally do a lot of research on characters and adapt their way of being/personality into how I think would fit for them based on the info I got for them.

For characters I'm really passionate about, I try to consume as much of their canon content as possible while reading fics available about them and trying to get into their shoes, yk?

I try to BE the character for a hot second to understand them better. It just helps thing imo.

ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡʀɪᴛᴇ ɪɴ ꜱɪʟᴇɴᴄᴇ ᴏʀ ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘʟᴀʏ ᴍᴜꜱɪᴄ?

-

I ALWAYS HAVE MUSIC PLAYING

I need it. There are very few times I've tried writing things in silence but I don't usually get very far </3

I always try to listen to music or songs that fit the mood of what I'm writing. It just gives inspo and drive for the writing <3

ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘʟᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜʀ ʀᴇᴘʟɪᴇꜱ ᴏʀ ᴡɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇᴍ?

-

I usually do things in the moment but depending on who I'm talking to, I try to better plan things out when I respond so I sound like a normal human being rather than the feral, impulsive mf I am.

ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏ ꜱʜɪᴘᴘɪɴɢ?

-

I love shipping <33 It makes things fun but I do enjoy characters and interactions between characters without the need for romance.

I just like how you can play around character in ways you probably couldn't before when you add a dash of romance or romantic uses into the mix.

ᴡʜᴀᴛ'ꜱ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴀʟɪᴀꜱ/ɴᴀᴍᴇ?

-

I'm some variation of Iced-Coffeebean on social medias and I usually go by Coffee. My 2p name (for shits and giggles) is Tea <3

I jokingly call myself *insert kinnie name* kinnie on discord.

I'm also called Mythos due to that being the main DnD character I play.

So I go by Coffee, Tea, and/or Mythos <3

ᴀɢᴇ?

-

I'm 19 but sometimes I feel like I'm a 28-year-old stuck in a teen's body from how hyperindependant I am and how that makes me stress over everything and makes me hella overthink. I'm surrounded by people that are older than me but act so childish and it makes me wanna rip my hair out sometimes </3

ʙɪʀᴛʜᴅᴀʏ?

-

I'm an Aquarius <3

ꜰᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ ᴄᴏʟᴏʀ(ꜱ)?

-

I FUCKING LOVE GREEN!!!! GREENS LIKE MY TUMBLR PAGE SETUP AND DISCORD BANNER ARE SO ❗️❗️❗️

I also love navy blue, grays, tans, blacks, and lavender!

ꜰᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ ꜱᴏɴɢ(ꜱ)?

-

Shooting Star by Owl City is an ALL TIME BANGER But I have top 5 songs that are ROTTING my brain rn (no specific order):

Pedastal by Aiko

Roméo by Pierre De Maere

Zari by Marina Satti

Luktelk by Silvester Belt

Daughter of the Sun by Aiko

ʟᴀꜱᴛ ᴍᴏᴠɪᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜᴇᴅ?

-

Breathless (1960) by Jean-Luc Godard

Had to watch it for my film class. It was okay.

ʟᴀꜱᴛ ꜱʜᴏᴡ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀᴛᴄʜᴇᴅ?

-

La Casa De Los Famosos for a reality show I've watched recently. Aside from that, probably either YGO or Hetalia. I don't remember. It's been a second.

ʟᴀꜱᴛ ꜱᴏɴɢ ʏᴏᴜ ʟɪꜱᴛᴇɴᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ?

-

Appetite of a People-Pleaser by Ghost and Pals cause I'm going feral </3

ꜰᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ ꜰᴏᴏᴅ?

-

I'd honestly kill for some pupusas de queso con chicharron. That with a non-alcoholic sangria and MMMM.

ꜰᴀᴠᴏʀɪᴛᴇ ꜱᴇᴀꜱᴏɴ?

-

Probably Spring or Fall.

As Nevadan, anything that isn't 116 F/46.6 C is WONDERFUL. But anything lower than 45 F/7.2 C is COLD for my desert ass </3

So naturally I enjoy the months that aren't actively trying to kill me. I've only seen snow twice in my lifetime in my city so if it starts snowing (despite me liking the idea of snow), I'd actually just combust into flames and explode.

ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴀ ᴛᴜᴍʙʟʀ ʙᴇꜱᴛ ꜰʀɪᴇɴᴅ?

-

I guess you could say that @starfishes-and-watercolors is my Tumblr bestie <333

We met via AO3 and then chatted on here before moving to Discord. But she has seen the best and worst of me fandom wise and IRL wise.

She helped me stay motivated with YGO GX content, specifically Anikishipping content or Shou/Syrus content. She just deals with me being a Hetalia thot now but yeah, I still really care about her and I'm glad to have met her.

______ I was tagged by @heta-micronomics

Tagging: @starsmadeinheaven, @starfishes-and-watercolors, and @stardust-revolver

[thatonecrookedsmile]

Uhhh it might be pretty late (literally), but we're a little less than 24 hours away from the release of Secrets of the Machine, so I wanted to get all my thoughts in order and put them in one post. Originally I went through them in the form of screenshots within my last drawing, but I thought it would be a bit clumsy, especially in a description that was already long. And even though it was in your own post it was weird, so I'll put the whole text here. I'm not used to going and publishing my thoughts in so much detail, especially when it comes to things I like. And I already make too long descriptions that bother me, so I'll probably never do this again!!

But I've written so much so far, so there's no going back. Here's my pre-release analysis/thoughts of the new game Bendy: Secrets of the Machine.

uuuuhhhhhhh enjoy?

So. “Secrets of the Machine”? New game focused on Gent. Huh. A surprise. But intriguing nonetheless. I don't mind Gent being explored more in the future. I've been thinking for a while that it would be interesting to see more of them besides just the Ink Machine itself and Thomas Connor. Plus, even though I still like stories focusing on the horrors of Joey Drew's studio, there will come a point where there will be nothing more to tell about that place, so I have no problem starting to also focus on the Other Bad Company in this universe which also has hand in the creation of the Ink Machine itself.

They are also credited on the Steam page as developers. I don't think that means anything other than being something meta. Not in the sense of "oh, look, we created a real company that has the same name as the in-universe company" (at least, I don't believe it will be that) and more of a "funny haha" kind of meta. This is a game that will focus on them after all.

Because of the enigmatic (for lack of a better term) circumstances of this game, it's difficult for me to analyze everything on the Steam page without my thoughts colliding so I'll be straight up about what I think this is going to be. Right away, this isn't going to be a big game. Not even close. I mean, this was announced almost 2 weeks ago with a release date of April 14th, it's going to be free, and it's 1GB big. It really won't be insanely big. (And considering that the devs are also working on The Cage - a game that probably won't be that big but definitely won't be a small spinoff either, and that of current game projects this is the Next Big Thing they're working on - I doubt it really would be)

I believe that one of the points of this game, if not, the main point of it - besides being a puzzle (?) game to occupy us during these waiting times - is to tease us future Bendy projects. I don't know if it will be THE way to give us teasers going forward but I believe it could be One of the ways. The Steam description says "Lurking amongst the shadows are glimpses into the past, the present, and the future of the Dark Puddles." So whatever happens in this game, not only will we see things related to the previous games but also things that are yet to come. What I think is most likely at the moment are teasers for, again, The Cage. Which I don't think is unlikely. The Pit, originally (at least in the real world from what it seems) was the Research Wing of the old Gent Workshop, so I think it's not impossible that Secrets could be a way to give a possible look at what we can expect from The Cage and the horrors of The Pit. Maybe later in the future, we may have teasers for Bendy 3. Possibly also for the Lone Wolf rebrand of BATDS? To be honest, this last one is the least likely possibility.

I saw someone before saying that this game could be a type of "Interactable Experience/Teaser". I believe the whole "Interactable" thing in the Steam's description resulted in this thought. (“Discover the interactable Secrets of the Machine…”) (“Unravel the Interactive Mystery.”)

I only know two "games" that fit this type, that teaser for the movie "Super 8" that you can play in the Portal 2 extras and the famous P.T (Playable Teaser for a canceled Silent Hill game). I don't know if SOTM fits into the same type of experience as these other 2, but we'll see (However, even though I know absolutely nothing about P.T., from what I hear, I think I can guarantee that whatever SOTM is, it will be far from what P.T. is, lol)

In a way, I see SOTM being something more or less similar to Dark Survival/Lone Wolf (whatever you prefer). 

It's going to be another small spinoff (even though, comparing the two, SOTM is larger than BATDS, with the first being 1 GB and the second being 285 MBs),something to occupy us in these moments of waiting, and as I said before, something to tease us for future things (even though, I think it can be argued that, if that was the original goal of BATDS, they didn't do a good job) (I mean, what did that game actually give us when it came to important teasers? Nathan's first mention? An entire audio log by Wilson? I think that's it)

It also seems like it won't just be a "one and done" thing, you know. Like, the game launches, and that's it. The end of the description mentions "Stay Close for Updates." So it seems that as time passes, this game will receive new updates with new content perhaps (let's just hope that this one doesn't "die" 4 months after the original release and we will have to wait 4 years later for another update)

The end of the summary it says "But stay alert, this realm changes often..." so this could also be the case where the environments in this game can also be randomly generated like the studio in Dark Survival? (or it could be a case where, we have fixed environments, but over time, the more updates we have, the world opens up more and more, perhaps?) The Drawing Room can also be a type of "main area" like the Safehouse and the dungeons in Boris's game.

In terms of story, I don't have many ideas. The basics would be a Gent employee was placed inside the Ink Realm for Experimental Reasons, and we are playing as this employee. Whatever places we visit in the cycle this time, they don't look like they came from JDS. 

In terms of characters, I think that of those that have been introduced in the games so far, the one that has the most chance of having a role is Alan Gray. He's the head of the whole business, so it would make sense for him to show up. Maybe hear from Thomas and other employees mentioned before? But I think this is very unlikely. And, as much as this is a bit absurd, I think that characters like Henry, Audrey, or even the Ink Demon will also not actually appear in the game and, at most, will have cameos (in relation to all the 'glimpses of the past, present and future')

Something interesting that was noticed, the code "131389145" (or rather, 13 1 3 8 9 14 5), changing the numbers for letters results in the word 'machine'. On the one hand, while I was organizing my thoughts, I considered the idea that the machine in this case could be the device with a toon face that appears in the trailer and screenshots, but, as others have pointed out before, it is much more possible that it is referring to the Ink Machine itself, which is more likely (and more interesting).

If that's the case, there's a good chance this game will take place after the end of Dark Revival, where Gent takes the machine for themselves again. Which, if this is the case, leaves me very intrigued.

Oh, and there will be mystery. We will solve The Mystery while we play. What mystery? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I don't know if there's much to say about the teaser itself, so I'm just going to comment on what I find most interesting.

- As much as I can't say that there really is something in the darkness during the first 13 seconds of the teaser, between 0:11 - 0:13, you can see something. It looks like some kind of cable I guess?

- The high-pitched scream. It appears in the device scene, and you can hear it even before, during the scene with the paint falling downwards, and before the house appears, but much lower. Nothing to comment other than I'll try to remember this when the game launches.

- The design of the house is strange to be honest. Bendy's face appears on one of the walls along with a message below, which you can't read. There is an entrance that only leads to darkness and something next to the entrance. It looks like a wheelchair to me, but I can't say for sure.

- Interesting that, both at the beginning of the teaser with the grainy film and in the device scene, you can see more colorful tones on the screen. Red, blue, purple, green, you get it. Maybe more about the experiments Wilson did? Who knows.

- The condition that Subject #131389145 is in is described as "Danger. Unstable." The name of the teaser is also "Unstable". I thought it was interesting to note.

Regarding the screenshots:

- Screenshot nº1: I don't know what this device is or what it does, but the fact that it appears in both the trailer and the screenshots gives me the idea that it's going to be something important.

- Screenshot nº2: A dark corridor with almost no light. A figure in the background, blurred. I've seen some people say the figure looks like Barley. I can't deny that they have a certain similarity (why does he look so thin, tho)

- Screenshot nº3: A kanji. This -> 悪 Means "evil". I'll be honest, this is the weirdest one for me.

- Screenshot nº4: Some kind of arch structure. I don't even think it's an entrance to somewhere, it's just an arch in the middle of nowhere. There's a cloud in the background, and something else that I can't identify.

- Screenshot nº5: A door in the middle of darkness. It leads to some room that you can't see either because it's blurred. It must be important. Maybe it takes us to the Drawing Room? In my opinion, the coolest screenshot of the 5 (I even made it my banner)

In conclusion:

I'm very interested! And this interest comes from the fact that I don't know what the hell this game is going to be. Yeah, I just wrote a few paragraphs about what I think this game could be, but at the end of the day, I don't really know what this game is going to be. And I want to know. The circumstances of his existence are so strange, and I'm drawn to it. What does this game have to offer, what will it tell me, who will I meet. I need to know what the Secrets of the Machine are,man (HE SAID IT).

This game may end up being a little different from the other Bendy games, and that goes in two different ways. Firstly, the way this game was found, the teaser, the screenshots, the logo, the Steam description. Yeah, it's a Bendy game, but there's something different this time. It could definitely be a new experience this time. (new in the sense of different) And secondly, considering what we know so far about that project, SOTM seems to share a little bit of Bendy: The Cage’s DNA, a game that, considering all the information we have available,will be a much more experimental and different game in comparison to the Bendy games that came before. And Secrets could very well be a small taste of what B:TC will offer, and if that is the case? I'm in.

Additional (or miscellaneous) comments:

- The devs have so far been ignoring this thing, which at first I found strange, but considering the nature of this game, it must be on purpose. After all, this is "Secrets of the Machine". And as far as I know, secrets are not something that are talked about in public. (Can’t believe Bendy finally entered his ARG arc)

- Even though the figure in the second screenshot looks a little bit like Barley, I have doubts as to whether the Butcher Gang will really be relevant in this game. First, what would Gent's interest in the gang be? And second...I don't know. The last time I saw people theorizing that the gang could be important in a future game, it turned out that in the end...they weren't. So I'm a little cautious.

- In the first 2 days that this game was discovered,there were some doubts as to whether this game was going to be a "troll game" or whether it was an April Fool's joke. I thought about that, and the fact that this game was discovered 1 day after April Fools didn't help. In hindsight,this idea doesn't make a lot of sense? Like, yeah, I know the joke about companies announcing games on April 1st that won't actually exist. I've seen this a few times. But like. This game was "shadow-announced" a day after the first, the whole thing had already passed, and it was scheduled to be released 2 weeks later. What kind of elaborate April Fools' Day is this where you announce a troll game one day after April Fools' Day specifically and want to launch it just 2 weeks later where everyone has already moved on with their lives? It wouldn't really be funny. Or smart.

#crookedsmile open his mouth #crookedsmile open his mouth;bendy #I'm not going to put this shit in the main tags; no fucking way lol

[iredreamer]

I watched the episode 1 of gentlemen jack season 2 and it felt a bit abrupt compared with the entire season 1. The season 1 was more delicate.

Anonymous asked: Did Sally didn't direct the season 2? That's why the episode 1 it felts abrupt to me. I prefer the tenderness, delicacy and care of the first season. I'm scared to see the next episodes.

I’m answering these two asks together since they’re very similar (probably from the same anon, anon tell me if I’m wrong).

The first thing I wanna say is that I quite agree with your sentiment – that was also my first impression – the episode is very fast paced, there’s no time to breathe, everyone talks a lot, it is very dense, very energetic, so much so that you can’t keep up, almost strenuous to watch and you feel tired at the end. There are also a lot of storylines being established (the coal, the tribe, the hotel, Mariana drama, Anne’s own emotional journey, Ann moving into Shibden, the Listers, the servants, etc. etc. – it is A LOT).

BUT

I’ve rewatched the ep multiple times (I at least did a rewatch per day so you do the math) and even if I’m still a bit on the fence about this whole vibe, I do believe it’s done on purpose and it does serve the narrative – hear me out.

At the start of this new season we find Anne at the top of her game, she has a wife, money, she’s doing business left and right, she’s renovating Shibden – the episode simply matches her energy which is insane! No one can keep up with her and we, as viewers, are not supposed to keep up with her either. The episode makes us feel exactly how we’re supposed to feel while we watch her spin all these plates.

Anne’s running on high adrenaline and everything in the episode tells you that: the music has been enriched; there’s always something going on in the background, people talking, working; there are a lot of wide shots which don’t really let us get close and intimate with the characters (a big difference from season one); there’s a lot of back and forth and Anne goes in the same places multiple times during the episode and it all feels a bit too much. Everything is too much. Even Anne’s looks to the camera feel a bit too much. Anne is all go-go-go. It is overwhelming to watch.

Because the way the episode is constructed is supposed to make you feel this way and because it serves the story, I can say that, even if personally it’s a bit too much for me (I do prefer, like you, the delicacy of the first season waaay more) it does make total sense that this is the way the first episode unravels.

Like you, I did miss Sally’s touch but I’m also very curious to see how everything evolves from here – at some point Anne is gonna hit rock bottom – I’m very curious to see how the tone of the show will change accordingly to Anne’s feelings – that’s at least how I think things will go, I guess all we can do is wait and see :)

Thank you for your messages and I hope you have a good weekend!

#ask #gentleman jack #anonymous #I'll probably write an analysis of the episode like the good old times #there are a couple of scenes that I believe are just exquisite #on so many levels #anatomy of a scene: gentleman jack

[sweetesthaaze]

I love them together but I wish Anthony had suffered a lot more and Kate pretend date Dorset, to make him jealous he still had the nerve to ask her own sister to marry him despite his feelings for her. He should never give his mother's ring to Edwina the plot was awful

Oh anon, I'm going to have to disagree with you on this one. Anthony suffered quite a bit after the whole thing, him and Kate both did. And it is not in Kate's nature to ever pretend date anyone. Pretend dating someone to make Anthony jealous would be the EXACT opposite of what she wants to do. She wants them to forget their feelings, not fuel the fire.

And yes Anthony did propose to Edwina after the first almost kiss, which was absolutely the most bone-headed thing ever, but later down the line when Anthony realizes that he cannot let go of his feelings, he tries to end the engagement. He tells Kate that he's going to break things off with Edwina and they will go their separate ways.

It's Kate that convinces him not to. Kate that says they can manage their feelings and it will never be anything else more than passion. That he cannot break Edwina's heart and has to marry her.

While it sucks that Edwina was the one to first get his mother's ring, I really don't think Kate would ever care that it was technically first Edwina's. It's a special ring to Anthony and she loves it no matter what.

There are absolutely things that could have done better, I've said as much in other posts, but ultimately I loved the plot. The writers were absolutely insane for the whole wedding fiasco and it's so great to watch the chaos unravel on screen. It's like a car crash. You just can't look away.

#anon #bridgerton #sweetestviscount #bridgerton spoilers

[itsmiyamore]

Sides of Town

Character: Sugawara Kōshi

Genre: Angst

Summary:

I have to ask your friend if you're fine or you're not 'cause you're not mine no more

Inspired by "Sides of Town" by Maisie Peters

a/n: I had this idea like, months ago when i was a major Suga simp (he's still one of my favorite characters, i just don't see him like that anymore), but I identify the song with those days so Suga it is 🥲 enjoy !

You walk down the street, already sweating from the insane heat beating down on your neck. The sun is blazing overhead, cicadas lazily buzzing around. There's kids playing in the playground, and you think they're crazy for running around in this sweltering heat.

It's the perfect day for ice cream, which coincidentally you also had a craving for. It's the only reason you'd be outside in these temperatures, it's hot even indoors with the windows open. There's no breeze, stifling air put your mind in a haze.

You don't realize it until you're there. You're standing before the ice cream parlor closest to your house. The colorful sign invites you in, children run out with sticky fingers as the ice cream melts down their cones.

It's Suga's favorite place for ice cream.

You bite your lip, looking down at your feet momentarily, cursing them for leading you here. Muscle memory sucks, you sigh. Or maybe your heart led you here, searching for the memories that once filled you with indescribable happiness.

You walk past the pretty store, ignoring the way the sweat drips uncomfortably down your shirt. Unfortunately, the other really good ice cream place was in another part of town, and you had to take the bus to get there.

The ride was short but felt like hell. You should've just stayed home, you think, and bought yourself a popsicle from the convenience store. The heat must be getting to you, you guess.

The bell of the ice cream parlor dings open as you enter, gasping in relief at the cold air. You order, claiming a table by the window. As you lick your ice cream, you peer outside, watching the people walk by.

It's a busier part of town, and your eyes subconsciously search for a familiar figure. A part of you hopes that he shows up, but the remainder knows he wouldn't. Because neither of you went to each other's favorite spots anymore.

"Out of respect" or some stupid shit about being polite. You scoff.

A brown head catches your eye and you sit up, squinting to see if it's who you think it is. You wipe your hands and throw away your napkin, rushing out. You're pushing your way through the crowd, desperate and gasping.

A small voice in your head warns you against it. You're just going to get hurt, it tells you. I won't, you lie back.

You extend a hand, grasping the back of the person's shirt, letting go as they turn around. They look at you, first in confusion, then in recognition.

"y/n."

"Daichi," you breathe. "It is you."

"Can I help you with something?" Daichi asks.

You gape at him, suddenly unsure of why you reacted this way. "Well um, what are you doing here?"

"Oh, I'm here to meet up with Suga."

You wince, gulping. Daichi's eyes widened, rubbing the back of his neck uncomfortably.

"Sorry," he apologizes. "I uh-"

"How is he?" you rush, avoiding eye contact. "Is he," you take a breath. "Is he okay?"

You're shaking, you realize. There's a strange sort of pain blossoming in your chest. A wound you thought was healed was picked at, fresh blood pouring out. Your nose begins to sting a bit.

"Yeah," Daichi shuffles, also looking anywhere but at you. "He's good."

And you think it's pathetic, the way those two words make you unravel in front of your ex's best friend. Your vision blurred and breathing became suddenly difficult as you tried to get a grasp on yourself.

"Hey y/n, are you-"

"I'm fine," you stumble out, sniffing. You rub the bottom of your nose quickly, flashing a smile at Daichi. He looks concerned, hand already reaching out in habit. "I'm good too."

You spin on your heel, shoving through the sea of people again, but this time it's suffocating. They jostle you around, and at every turn you just see him. Suga.

He's across the street, sitting at a table, a stranger pushing past you, right next to you holding your hand because he's still yours and suddenly he's not anymore and you're just trying to let everything go but you don't want to let him go because you don't think you'll ever find a hand that fits as perfectly as his does with yours.

Love wasn't supposed to be finite, you cry. It was supposed to be forever so how, you're screaming, how is it possible that he's okay when he's not yours anymore? Because he always said you made him happiest, and now you don't and you're not sure what to believe. You want to think those pretty words were true, even if just once upon a time, but aren't all lies built on sugar and snow?

You thought you were doing okay but now you're crumbling, sinking, crying, trying your damnedest but you can't seem to get it right.

He's haunting you and you can't run when he's in everything and everywhere.

Because Suga is your everything. And you're just not his anymore.

#haikyuu!! #haikyuu #haikyuu drabbles #haikyuu headcanons #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x you #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu angst #haikyuu songfic #angst #sugawara kōshi #haikyuu sugawara #sugawara x you #sugawara x reader #sugawara scenario #sugawara imagine #sugawara drabble #sugawara oneshot #sugawara angst

[ldyinblckmsk]

Always the extra, never the lead

Pairing: Bakugou Katsuki x F! Reader

Genre: Angst

Words: 1.8k

A/N: Hey, guys! I'm back hoho serving another angst (if you squint your eyes lol). I hope I broke your heart or makes you feel pain or sad coz that's what i wanna make you feel while you read my piece oftrash. This plot is plaguing mah mind. Also, the title sucks lolololol I can't think of anything argh!

Enjoy :)

It's funny how people cheer themselves up by thinking that they are the main character of their own story. You think that it's  ridiculous to give themselves a fake hope while the fact that the cycle of their story doesn't change anything. They'll never be the protagonist, no matter how hard they try to be one.

That's why you gave up, right. You settle yourself to be just a bystander, watching the main roles act their piece under the big spotlight. Watching the man you love entranced by the stare of the girl he likes. See, it's not you. Because, after all, as much as you wanted to be the Cinderella or Snow White or any other damnsel in distress, he'll never be the prince that will save you. You're just an extra.

Confess your profounding love to him? You already thought of it and considering the consequences of it, you're just a coward who didn't want to jeopardize the only relationship you had with him. You're fine with being his bestfriend. At least, you still have an excuse to be at his house until midnight just hanging out with him. You can still wear his hoodies  and imagine yourself acting like how the other girls did to their significant other.

That until she came.

He spent less time hanging out with you. He rarely even talks to you and ask if you're still breathing. As if all of a sudden, every memories you spent with him vanished like a bubble when the narrator introduced his leading lady. Of course, you were jealous, infuriating to be honest, she stole your man, the ash blond you were crushing since you laid your eyes on him. And the thing that makes you go insane is the fact that you don't have the right to be angry because he's not yours to claim.

The only thing you can do is sit there and let yourself drown in pain. Pretend that you're fine with the set-up and act normal. You didn't want to mess up the play, don't you?

Fine, my ass. You're not a masochist.

They're still not together, that means she's not his either.  They're still at the phase of knowing each other, so you still have a chance to confess. There's no way that they already fall in love with each other that fast.

Here you are in his room, laying comfortably on the silky sheets of his bed, staring at the ceiling. You just invite yourself to his house.

"Hey, dumbass! Are you even listening to me?" His voice snapped you out of trance. "I'm sorry. I got a lil dizzy for a sec. What were you saying?"

"You alright?" The hint of concern on his voice didn't go unnoticed by you and you just cherish this moment that way you always do. Your breath hitched when you felt his cold hands touch your forehead, his other hand on his comparing your temperature. The small act of friendship makes your blood rush to your cheeks.

"Geez. I'm fine, Katsu." You rolled your eyes at him, swatting his hand away. As much as you want to prolong the skinship, you didn't want to make yourself become a flustered mess. "Now, what were you saying?" You propped your head with both hands under your chin, as you roll on his bed now laying flat on your stomach.

"I said are you coming with me this Friday night. We're just going to eat." You looked at him suspiciously. For a second, your heart triumphs.

"Wow, you already want to see me again."

"Tch. Just say yes or no, idiot." You chuckled at his scowling face. "Just admit that you missed me, grumpy-chan."

"You're a pain in the ass."

And just like that, you didn't have any decent to sleep as you were so excited for Friday to roll. Whatever plan he has, you can't help but to think that it's like he's asking you to go out with him. Ignoring the second line he said, you let yourself dive in fantasy.

It's Thursday and you're still conflicted on what to wear, you asked for help of your friends. Surprisingly, they agreed to help you right away without raising their brows and questioning you about the date with the 'mystery man'. 'Cause they already know who it was, just from how eager you look.

Your love for the blond isn't news to them. Being classmates and friends for almost three years, they already knew how your mind works though they didn't really know how frenzy and complicated the wires in it. They just know the surface of it.

"How about this?" Mina showed you the haltered red dress that ends just above your knee. You decided on it right away which makes your friend shakes their head at your eagerness. After that, you're just casually having fun, giving you advices and tips on your so-called date from their experience.

You saw him leaning on his car, permanent scowl on his face while constantly checking his phone. You eyed him from your position, awe struck at the ravishing aura he oozes. The white dress shirt he's wearing highlights the muscle he workrd so hard to built. He looks so clean and sinful at the same time.

"There you are, grumpy-chan!" You walked towards him slowly, smacking his back as your usual greeting, smile plastered on your face with the hint of blush spreading on your cheeks. You watched him stunned for a while, eyes roaming to your body. "About fucking time. Let's go."

You were surprised when he opened the door for you but you just shake it off. He's gentle, seems like his careful with his actions.

He glanced at you for a moment before he went inside the car. His heart went wild when he saw you. He thought you looked prettier when you dressed up. He always saw you wearing baggy shirts that's why when you showed up with that tight dress he malfunctioned for a bit. You looked bold and sexy like a predator hunting its prey, quite opposite from the girl he's pining. He shakes the thoughts of you away as he began to drive.

Akiya is full of sunshine and rainbows. She's sweet and looks vulnerable like an antique dishware that needs to be taken care of. And he has the great urge to protect the quirkless girl. Funny, how he was so bully to Deku being quirkless and  here he was falling for one.

He was so upset to himself when he found out his stupid affection to the girl. Their constant talking amd bubbly personality made it possible to like her. But everytime he's with her, his mind straying away to your well-being. He knew that you have feelings for him but he didn't dig further because you're not vocal about it. With how much his time was spent with you, he cared deeply for you. He loves you, of course, but it isn't like kind of love you felt for him.

After sorting out those endless thoughts, still, his adoration for Akira weighs more than your friendship.

That's why he's inviting you to dinner with him.

The anxiety is bubbling up inside you. The look on his face screams that there's something going on inside his head that you're not ready to unravel. Call it instinct but something feels odd. The ambience around you doesn't suit your guts. You're beyond happy that you're having a good time with him but there's this unsettling feeling that's eating your inside.

Is this what you think it is?

He's the one who initiates the conversation first, sensing the awkwardness in your table. Feeling blue, you just answered him with nods and short words. Clenching your jaw as you forced yourself to smile naturally. It's not really that difficult for you to do it since you are good at hiding.

The dinner was served and you just sat there, eating in silence. You don't dare move your eyes from your plate. You felt him checking on you for the nth time of the night then followed by a sigh.

You fucking knew it. Your grip on the knife was tight while slicing the tender beef. You're silently praying that you'll have the control of your emotions tonight. The night is still young but the 'date' is nearing to end. 

"Y/n, just don't fucking talk and listen to me." His hand combing his spiky hair in frustration. He didn't know how to break it to you without hurting you. "What's with the serious talk, grumpy-chan? It's not like you, ya know." You laughed.

"I said I'll do the talking, idiot." You rolled your eyes at his remark."You know Akiya, right?"

"Uh, yeah, she's the girl you like, right." You said with an obvious tone in your voice, smiling, almost seemed like you're teasing him. Almost. Because the bitterness you felt left a hint on your voice.

Silence. No one dared to speak. Not because of your last statement. It seems like gods are not in the mood to heed your prayer as you desperately trying to stop the tears that you didn't know were already falling. You inhaled deeply, calming yourself down, slowly accepting your defeat.

You were the one that breaks the eerie silence. "So, you two are already together. Is that what were you going to say to me? Or is there anything el–" 

Oh.

Realization strucks your chords. How can you be so fucking simpleton? A small laugh leaves your mouth while nodding your head crazily, new batch of tears forming in your eyes. He only watched you, confused.

"Oh my god! You fucking knew it. Am I right?"

"Y/n–"

"I'm a clown. You knew I love you yet–" You laughed again. People gaze at your direction, feeling pity at your state. You are mess right now.

"What the fuck are you talking about? Yes, I knew it. I knew your feelings but your my bestfriend for fuck's sake!" He raised his voice, bloodshot eyes lingering at your form.

As if like you flipped your switch, you looked at him with blank eyes, no emotions were found as you speak to him. "Is it entertaining? Is it funny to watch me make a fool of myself? Am I stroking your ego when I looked at you with fucking heart eyes huh, Bakugou? Tell me."

"That's why I'm fucking talking to you right now. I want you to stop it. I need you to stop loving me because I can't reciprocate it...I love Akiya."

"I know! Don't fucking rub it on my face. I know it. I already knew it! Okay? And yet here I am still fucking hoping that there's still a chance." You're desperately trying to sound fine, wishing for your voice not to crack. "I-I'm still fucking praying that I wish it's me. Why the hell it can't be me? Why, Katsuki?"

No, you're not going to break down in front of him. That will be last tears you'll shed. You shut your eyes tightly, regaining your control over your emotions. You didn't spare a glance at him, looking yourself at your mirror while retouching your make-up. You grabbed your phone, texting Mina to pick you up while you're talk to him. "Just so you know, I'm not going to cut ties with you. If that's what you're worried about. I'm still your friend, dropping the 'best'."

You looked up at him, eyes meeting his for the last time. You saw his pained expression, clenching his jaw when he looked away.  You get up, ready to leave. "Another thing, next time when you reject someone don't do it over a fancy dinner. That just gives them a false hope and that's fucking painful." You chuckled.

Bitter smile plastered on your face,  you prepare yourself for the conclusion of the story. Walking to his side, you bend to him while placing a kiss on his cheek, whispering your final dialogue as the side character.

"Goodbye, grumpy-chan."

#bnha x reader #bnha angst #bakugou x reader #katsuki x reader #bnha #mha bakugou #bnha bakugo x reader #bnha bakugō #bnha bakugo katsuki

[fanmoose12]

May I request a one shot where hanji goes to this cafe a lot to hear a pianist play and said pianist is Levi. (So i guess this is a cafe au? I'm not sure lol) and then romance blossoms between them ❤. Thank you and I hope you are well!

hey sorry for taking so long to finish this thing, but i’ve been veeeery busy with my homework

that being said, huuuge thanks for your prompt, i’ve had a lot of fun writing it!!

It was Hange’s favorite café. It was situated perfectly between her workplace and her apartment, and she liked its calm and cozy atmosphere. She also liked the people who worked there – the owner of the café was her college friend Erwin and Hange’s childhood friend Mike worked in the kitchen.

So she frequently visited the place, coming with Moblit or her other coworkers to relax after a long day of work with a cup of soothing tea, or stopping by to drink a cup of coffee with her friend Nanaba, chatting softly and enjoying Mike’s delicious cupcakes.

Every Friday, there was an evening of live music, and Hange came every week to listen to the soft sounds of the piano, that stood in the corner.

She did not, of course, come to gawk at the insanely attractive pianist with black hair and the most piercing grey eyes she had ever seen. She did not, because she didn’t find him attractive. At all. It’s just… he was really good at playing the piano and Hange lost herself in watching how his long and slender fingers pressed the keys, how he moved his hands across the instrument, never missing a single note. And that was all she liked about him! Surely she didn’t enjoy looking at his sharp and scowling face or his black shiny hair that obscured his beautiful eyes.

However, Hange couldn’t help but notice that all the songs he played were melancholic and more than a little bit sad. The more she watched the man, the more she wanted to unravel his mystery. He seemed lonely, so very lonely, and Hange wanted to know his story. She wanted to befriend him, to know more about him, maybe even put a smile on his permanently scowling face.

                                                           ***         

One evening, as she was once again mesmerized by the sight of the man, bended slightly over the piano, as his fingers danced over the keyboard, Hange got an idea.

She noticed, a long time ago, that from time to time, in between the songs, the man rose from his seat and exited the café, using the back door.

And this evening Hange, curious, decided to follow him.

When she walked outside, she saw the man, leaning against the brick wall and smoking a cigarette, his face raised up to stare at the night sky. Hange stopped dead in her tracks, unable to take her eyes away from the scene in front of her. She couldn’t stop staring at his long fingers, which held a cigarette, at the way he inhaled it, releasing the smoke slowly and watching the small cloud disappear into the night.

Looking at him like that, Hange was having problems remembering that she just wanted to befriend the man. To be honest, she was having problems remembering why the fuck she even decided to follow him in the first place.

“Do you want something, four-eyes? Or are you going to just keep staring at me like a creep?” the man asked, finally turning to face her. His voice was deep and husky, and yeah, Hange definitely needed to take a grip on herself.

So she shook her head and put a radiant, cheerful smile on her face.

“Hi!” she exclaimed, taking a step closer to the man. He didn’t make a move and just stood there, regarding Hange with furrowed eyebrows, his face set in an expression of annoyance.

Hange didn’t let it faze her. She was used to people looking at her like that, after all.

“I just wanted to tell you how talented you are! I’ve been coming to this café for a long time and-“

“I noticed.” The man told her quietly, looking away from her and taking another drag of his cigarette.

“Huh?”

“I noticed that you come here a lot.” The man repeated and his face became even more annoyed than before. “It’s very hard not to. You and your friends are very fucking loud, four-eyes.”

Hange chuckled awkwardly in reply, her hand coming to scratch her head shyly. This conversation didn’t seem to go the way she planned.

“Well, as I said, I wanted to compliment your skills. And to introduce myself.” Hange extended her hand, her eyes lightening up with amusement at the man’s obvious confusion. “I’m Hange Zoe.”

The man stared at her for a couple of seconds, bringing the cigarette to his lips and inhaling it deeply. He then put out the cigarette and flicked the butt of it to the nearest trashcan.

Hange still stood with her hand outstretched, waiting for his reply.

The man turned away from her and opened the door to the café, ready to go back inside.

“Oi!” Hange cried out, grabbing him by the shoulder. “It’s very rude to just ignore other people like that!”

“Well, I am very rude person,” the man replied, walking into the building, even though Hange’s hand was still on his shoulder. “I’m not going to tell you my name. Hange Zoe.” the man huffed arrogantly. He shook Hange’s hand off him and disappeared behind the door.

Hange stared after him, confused by what just happened. A moment later, though, a big grin appeared on her face, as she thrusted her hands inside her pockets and chuckled softly.

So he didn’t want to tell her his name, huh? Well, that just meant that Hange had to find it out some other way.  

                                                         ***    

So the next Friday Hange, armed with her new-found information, followed the man outside again.

He was once again smoking, leaning against the brick wall and staring up at the sky.

When he noticed Hange standing next to him, he sighed and rolled his eyes.                        

“Fuck off, four-eyes. I told you already I’m not going to tell you my name.”

“I don’t need you to,” Hange’s lips curved into a shit-eating grin, as she clasped her hands behind her back. “I already know it. Levi Ackermann. I also know that you are 29 years old and you’ve been working at this café for two years. Apart from playing the piano every Friday, you also work here as a janitor and sometimes as a waiter.”

The man gave her an unimpressive look, throwing away his cigarette and crossing his hands on his chest. “Have you been stalking me, four-eyes?”

Hange huffed. “As if I needed to. I just asked Erwin and he told me everything I wanted to know. And I’ve told you already, my name is Hange Zoe, stop calling me four-eyes.”

“Should I call Dr. Zoe then?”

“Huh?” Hange widened her eyes in surprise. “How did you-“

Levi gave her a flat look. “You’re not the only one who can ask Erwin about shit.”

“Aha!” Hange pointed her finger at him, smiling victoriously. “You were interested in me too!”

“Keep dreaming, four-eyes,” Levi grumbled, waving Hange’s hand away from his face. “I just asked Erwin why you are such a weirdo, and he started blubbering some stupid shit about you.”

“Oi, Levi, c’mon!” Hange whined as she followed him inside. “We should become friends! I know you want to!”

Levi turned around to face her. His eyes were narrowed, as he gave Hange his most terrifying glare. Hange didn’t even flinch. “What makes you think I want to be friends with a freak like you?”

“The fact that you still talk to me?”

Levi rolled his eyes and started walking away from Hange. “I don’t do friends.”

“Mark my words, Levi!” Hange shouted after him, waving her hands around. “I’ll make you my friend! You can’t escape from me!”

“What a weirdo,” Levi muttered, although his lips involuntarily curved into a smile.

                                                           ***    

One evening, Hange visited the café by herself. Usually she came together with her friends, but Moblit was out of town visiting his family and Nanaba was too busy with her work. And Hange, despite her typical cheerfulness and easy-goingness, preferred to be left alone for tonight. This week had been rather stressful for her, with so much work to do, and Hange felt tired to the bone.

As she sat at her favorite table, holding a cup of green tea in her hands and listening to Levi playing the piano, Hange felt her mind go numb, the peaceful atmosphere and relaxing sounds of Levi’s music soothing her. Soon she felt her eyelids grow heavy and Hange laid her head on her hands just for a second, just to let her eyes rest.

She didn’t notice how she fell into a deep slumber.

                                                           ***    

Hange woke up with a start, as she felt how someone tentatively laid a hand on her shoulder, squeezing it awkwardly, but gently.

“Oi, Hange, there is no need to cry about some asshole. I’m sure you can find yourself someone ten times better than that idiot.

Hange’s lips immediately curved into a smile as she recognized Levi’s gruff voice.

Wait, what did he said?

Hange lifted her head to stare at him.

“Levi, what are you talking about?”

“What? I was just trying to comfort you. You are obviously heartbroken over the break-up with that shitty boyfriend of yours.”

“Huh?” Hange blinked a few times to make sure she wasn’t still sleeping. Levi was surely spouting some nonsense right now. “Levi, I don’t have a boyfriend.”

“Yeah, I know you don’t anymore, that’s why I brought you a cake,” he showed her the tray with another cup of tea and a plate with a piece of Hange’s favorite chocolate cake.

Hange stared at the tray, her mouth filling with saliva at the sight of such delicious food. She grabbed the plate from Levi’s hands and immediately started to stuff her face with cake.  

“Disgusting.” Levi commented, sitting at the table across from Hange and staring at her. “You eat like a wild animal, Hange.”

“It’s so delicious!” Hange smiled happily at him, her mouth and cheeks already dirty with chocolate. “You should try it, too, Levi!” She outstretched the fork with cake to Levi, waiting for him to take a bite.

“I’m not going to do it.” Levi crossed his hands on his chest, scowling at Hange.

The smile on Hange’s lips grew wider as she moved the fork closer to Levi’s mouth. “C’mon, just a little bite!” She said in a sweet voice.

“No.”

“Please.”

“I said no.”

“Pretty please?” Hange made her best rendition of puppy eyes.

Levi huffed, cursed and then bended over, putting the fork in his mouth and eating the offered piece.

Hange beamed. “And?” she asked impatiently. “Did you like it?”

“It’s fine. Guess, Mike really knows how to cook.”

“By the way,” finished with her food, Hange put her chin on her hand, studying Levi intently. “How did you know that it was my favorite one?”

“How do you think? I asked that giant Mike.”

Hange’s lips curled into a sly smile. “I thought Mike’s shift ended at six? It’s half past nine already.”

Levi turned his head away from her, but Hange could swear she saw a faint blush on his cheeks. “I called him.”

“Oh my god!” Hange clasped her hands in delight. “Levi, that’s so nice of you! Thank you!”

“Don’t mention it. You just looked really shitty today, and I hated it.”

“Thank you, Levi, really, I appreciate it more than you think,”Hange said softly. To be honest, she appreciated Levi’s gesture more than she probably should, as a warm, pleasant feeling settled in her stomach. “But I still don’t understand what you meant earlier. With that whole break-up thing.”

“Huh? Weren’t you crying over something? I thought it was because that idiot dumped you.”

“What idiot?”

“The one you always come with? The guy with a constantly constipated face.”

Hange giggled at Levi’s description. “Do you mean Moblit? But, Levi, we aren’t dating. We’re just friends.”

Levi narrowed his eyes. “Then what the fuck have you been crying about?”

Hange awkwardly scratched her head. “I wasn’t crying? I just fell asleep on the table.”

Levi stared at her in disbelief. “You… you what? You were sleeping this whole time? What the fuck, Hange?”

Hange burst out laughing and the crease between Levi’s brows deepened.

“Unbelievable.” He continued. “And here I was worrying about you like some idiot, thinking you were heartbroken, and you… you just fell asleep! In the café! Which was full of people!”

“I had a pretty crazy week,” Hange tried to explain in between her laughs.

“You’re a goddamn weirdo, Hange.” Levi said in exasperation.

When her laugh had subdued, Hange smiled softly at Levi. She covered his hand with hers.

“That was very sweet of you, Levi, thank you once more.”

It took Levi a couple of seconds to register Hange’s words as he couldn’t look away from their joined hands. His heart started to beat faster and he felt his hands becoming clammy. He couldn’t decide if he liked this feeling inside of him or not, but he didn’t want Hange to move away.

But he also had a reputation, and he couldn’t just sit there, holding hands with Hange as though he was some love-struck idiot. Because he was not some love-struck idiot.

So Levi threw Hange’s hand away from him, swiftly getting to his feet.

“It’s getting late, four-eyes. Go home and get some sleep for fuck’s sake.”

“Yes, sir!” Hange mockingly saluted to him and also rose from her seat. She grabbed her bag and put on her jacket.

Before she walked out of the café, she grabbed Levi by the shoulder and leaned it to kiss him on the cheek.

“I told you we will become friends!” she exclaimed loudly, trying to be louder than her wildly beating heart.

This whole exchange with Levi was confusing her. Hange thought she was just a nuisance to Levi, but tonight he showed that he actually cared about her.

As a friend, Hange had to remind herself, he cared about her only as a friend. Or maybe, he just pitied her.

Whatever the case, Levi didn’t like her, especially in the way Hange liked him. He was tolerating her, and Hange shouldn’t even hope for something more.

So Hange waved at Levi one last time and then headed home, trying to get Levi’s impossibly beautiful eyes out of her mind.

                                                           ***    

One time, Hange came to the café too early and found Levi in the process of setting up the piano.

She came to stand next to him, leaning over the instrument and watching how Levi’s fingers delicately pressed the keys.

“You know, my mother always wanted to make some kind of artist out of me,” Hange began with a wistful smile. “She tried to teach me the piano and guitar, made me join the singing and dancing classes. And I was terrible at all of them.”

Levi raised his head to look at her. “And why am I not surprised?”

“Oi, that was rude!” Hange laughed, smacking his arm.

“Levi?” Hange called as a new idea appeared in her head. “Will you teach me how to play the piano?”

“You just told me you were terrible at it.”

“Maybe, I just didn’t have a good teacher.” Hange replied, smirking.

Levi silently studied her face for a long moment. Then he cursed and moved over to make a place for Hange at the bench.

“Come here.”

“Yay!” Hange happily exclaimed, as she sat next to Levi. “What do I do?” she asked, her fingers hovering above the keys.

Levi slapped her hands away. “For now you do nothing, and just watch what I’m doing. We’ll get to practice some other time.”

Hange sighed, a pout appearing on her face, but she complied. She pressed closer to Levi and laid her head on his shoulder. He tensed for a second, but then relaxed and resumed his check-up of the instrument.

Hange watched his every movement, a small smile painting her features. This warm feeling in her chest, the same one she got every time Levi was next to her, returned.

Hange thought, fleetingly, that she wanted this moment to last forever.

And that’s when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

Hange jumped and whirled around to see whose hand it was.

Behind her stood Erwin, his hands on both Hange and Levi’s shoulders. There was a warm and a little apologetic smile on his lips.

“Is everything ready for tonight, Levi?”

Hange abruptly stood up.

“I… I need to go!” she said a bit too loudly. “Levi, Erwin, goodbye! Have a nice evening!” Hange waved at them and then hurried towards the exit, her mind reeling from what had just happened.

Just moments ago, she was pressed so closely to Levi, her head lying on his shoulder and it was… it was a rather intimate position, and Hange couldn’t understand why Levi didn’t push her away. Surely, he wanted to, right?

Hange furiously shook her head, trying to clear her mind. Levi was such a nice guy! Such kind and caring friend, and Hange was ruining their friendship with her stupid, improper feelings.

Hange had to stop being so greedy and appreciate what she already had with Levi. She had to start treasuring their tentative friendship and stop hoping for something more and imagining something that definitely wasn’t there.

                                                           ***    

Hange decided to put some distance between them, so the next time she came to the café, she just waved at Levi in greeting and then focused on her conversation with Moblit. It was hard for her to restrain herself from stealing small glances at Levi, but she always made sure to watch him while he wasn’t looking.

Moblit kept looking weirdly at her the whole time, noticing her strange behavior, but thankfully, because he was a really good friend, he said nothing about it.

In the following weeks, Hange continued in the same manner. She spoke to Levi only when he was the one to initiate the conversation and she stopped herself every time she wanted to touch him.

One time, as he was passing her the cup of coffee, their fingers accidentally brushed and Hange pulled her hand away so swiftly, the cup fell to the ground.

Levi cursed at her for making a mess. He hid his face from Hange, beginning to clean the floor, but as she accidentally made an eye contact with him, Hange saw something weird in his gaze. Levi’s eyes had a hurtful look in them, but Hange just shook her head, convincing herself that she just imagined it.

                                                             ***    

Two and a half weeks later, Levi was fed up with her bullshit.

Hange was chatting with Nanaba, when Levi came to her and grabbed her by the shirt, yanking her up and starting to drag her away.

“Levi! What-- what the fuck?”

“Shut up, four-eyes.” Levi growled, not even looking at her.

He pushed her out of the café and into the alleyway. Then he stood in front of her. His hands were crossed on his chest as he regarded her with cold eyes.

“Spill it out, Hange.”

“Huh? Spill what out?”

“What the fuck I did wrong.”

“Wh-- Levi, you did nothing wrong!”

“Then why the fuck are you ignoring me?”

Hange opened her mouth to reply, but Levi immediately cut her off. “Don’t try to deny it, Hange! You’ve been ignoring me for weeks now!”

He took a step towards her, and Hange tried to take a step away from him, but her back had hit the wall.

So Hange just stood there, hopelessly staring in Levi’s angry eyes.

“I thought I annoyed you.” Hange finally replied in an uncharacteristically small voice. She lowered her head in shame, unable to meet Levi’s gaze. There was something in his eyes, something that Hange couldn’t understand.

“Are you a goddamn idiot?” Levi asked after a few seconds. Despite the harshness of his words, his voice was soft. “Don’t you think I would make it very much clear if I didn’t like your company?”

“You like my company?” Hange widened her eyes in shock. She lifted her head to stare at Levi.

“Of course, I do, stupid.”

“And you consider me a friend?”

Levi sighed, but didn’t look away from Hange. “Unfortunately.”

Against her will, Hange’s lips curved into a big, happy smile. “And did you miss me all this time?”

Levi huffed, rolling his eyes. “I wouldn’t go that far, but,” he stopped and stared right at Hange, letting her see the rare softness in his eyes. “It was quite boring without your stupid face and shitty jokes.”

And Hange couldn’t restrain herself anymore, she launched herself at Levi, pressing him tightly to her chest.

She promised herself she would treat Levi as a friend. And friends frequently hugged each other, right?

As she wrapped her hands around Levi’s neck, Hange suddenly felt his hands on her back as he pressed her even closer to him.

“Don’t do such stupid shit again, Hange,” he whispered in her shoulder. “I thought you got sick of me or something.”

“I never get sick of my friends. And you are my friend, Levi.” Hange giggled.

“Good,” Levi’s voice was quiet, but fierce. It sent a million of shivers down Hange’s spine. “Because you’re mine friend as well.”

Hange hurried to untangle herself from Levi. The more they stood so close to each other, the harder it became to stop herself from doing something stupid. Like kissing Levi, or telling him what exactly she felt for him.

“I probably need to go back to Nanaba,” Hange scratched her neck. “She probably thinks you dragged me out there to kill me, or something.”

“Oh, yeah, sorry about that, I guess. But it was your fault too, you’re the one who kept running away from me every time I wanted to talk to you.”

“Well, we are both a pair of idiots, then.” Hange chuckled. “I’ll see you around?”

“Yeah, I’ll see you around, Hange.”

                                                           ***    

“Oi, four-eyes,” Hange jumped at the sound of Levi’s voice. She was too lost in her thoughts to notice his approach. “We are closing soon, why aren’t you going home?”

Hange checked her watch and was surprised to find out that it was almost ten pm. “Oh my!” Hange exclaimed, grabbing her bag. “I completely forgot about the time!”

She got to her feet, but before she could take any step further, Levi grabbed her by the hand.

“Wait,” he narrowed his eyes and looked more closely at her. “Where is your umbrella?”

“My umbrella?” Hange awkwardly chuckled. “I don’t have any.”

“Are you out of your goddamn mind?” Levi almost growled. “Look at the weather!” he pointed to the window with his chin.

Hange looked out of the window. There was quite a storm outside. Huh, she seemed to miss that as well.

“I’ll be fine, Levi,” she tried to wave him off. “It’s just a rain.”

Levi rolled his eyes. “Just a rain my ass.” He sighed deeply. “I’ll be finished in a couple of minutes. Wait for me, and I’ll walk you home.”

“Levi, that’s unnecessary!” Hange protested. “I don’t live that far from here, and nothing is going to happen to me.”

“And what if you get sick?” Levi pressed. Hange’s heart melted at the sight of his angry, yet worried gaze. “I’m walking you home, Hange, and I’m not taking no for an answer.”

Hange sighed, giving up. Despite what everyone thought about her, she knew when to choose her battles. And that was not the fight she had a chance of winning.

“You worry too much.” She muttered.

“Someone has to.”

                                                             ***                                   

After Levi finished with his cleaning and closed the café, they started to slowly make their way towards Hange’s apartment.

The wind was blowing heavily, and the raindrops were cold and sharp. Hange and Levi had to press close to each other to fit under one umbrella.

Since Hange was taller than Levi, she held the umbrella above both of them, making sure to protect Levi from the rain as much as possible. However, when Levi noticed that Hange was keeping the umbrella more above him than herself, he growled and snatched it out of her hands.

“You’re a goddamn idiot.” He mumbled as he proceeded to shield both of them from the rain.

Hange felt as a smile made its way on her lips once again. The wind was howling around them and the rain seemed to become even heavier than before, but Levi’s presence kept her warmer than she felt in days.

                                                         ***    

“And we’re here,” Hange announced as they reached her apartment.

Levi nodded, looking up at her.

Hange knew that now she had to thank Levi for his concern and then say goodbye to him, maybe wish him a goodnight. She had to turn around and enter her apartment. But. Something inside of her didn’t allow her to do it.

So before she could stop herself, Hange asked.

“Would you like to come upstairs? I could make you some coffee.”

“I hate coffee,” Levi answered and Hange lowered her head, taking his words as an obvious refusal.

Hange hurriedly turned away, trying to hide her disappointed expression. But Levi’s hand on her forearm stopped her.

“But I would love to have a cup of tea.”

Immediately Hange’s lips curved into a big, happy smile. “Sure!” she exclaimed, grabbing Levi by the hand and dragging him into her apartment.

                                                           ***    

Holding mugs with hot beverage, Hange and Levi sat side by side at the sofa in Hange’s living room.

Levi seemed to look around the room, while Hange desperately tried to think of something to say to fill the awkward silence.

Usually, she was good at talking, more than good, as people were frequently annoyed with her inability to shut up. But now, when she needed it so much, Hange couldn’t think of a single thing to say.

Her mind was still trying to come up with some topic of conversation, when Levi suddenly got to his feet, putting his mug on a coffee table.

“I… I’m sorry, Hange,” he breathed out. “I just can’t do this.”

Hange’s heart skipped a beat, as her lips slid downwards. She was such an idiot. Why did she even expect something different? Of course, Levi would hate spending time with her, it was probably too awkward for him, and Hange shouldn’t have even thought about asking him to come over.

She glanced at him, her mouth already forming an apology, but Hange stopped dead in her tracks when she noticed the look on Levi’s face. It was full of disgust and repulsion.

With the same look on his face, he picked one of the dozen papers that were scattered on Hange’s coffee table.

“What is this shit?” he asked, carefully holding the coffee stained paper with two fingers and showing it to Hange. “This is fucking… this is such a fucking mess, four-eyes. What the fuck?” he questioned, looking around the room.

He took a few steps, reaching a pile of Hange’s dirty laundry that she had been meaning to do for weeks now.

“What is this?” Levi continued in the same disgusted voice. He kicked the pile of clothes, as though it personally offended him. “How can you live surrounded by such trash? This is not an apartment, that’s a fucking garbage can.”

And Hange couldn’t hold it anymore, she burst out laughing. She bended over, continuing to laugh. Tears gathered in the corner of her eyes and her stomach started to hurt, but she couldn’t stop.

Here she was, thinking Levi wanted to leave, because he didn’t enjoy her company, while the man was just perplexed by state of Hange’s apartment.

“Oh my god, Levi,” Hange croaked after her laugh had subdued. “You’re something else. I don’t think I’ve ever seen such a clean-freak as you.”

Hange made a mistake of raising her head and looking at Levi. His displeased and annoyed face sent her into another fit of giggles.

“This isn’t funny, Hange. There is so much dirt and dust around, it’s not healthy for you to live like this. And you should be aware of that, you’re a biology professor!”

“Oi, you’re obviously exaggerating, Levi. Maybe, my apartment is a bit unkempt, but it’s not nearly as bad as you say.”

“You’re right, it’s way worse.” Levi took off his jacket and rolled up the sleeves of his shirt. “I can’t let you live like this, surrounded by such garbage.”

“Huh?” Hange cocked her head to the side, studying Levi curiously. “Just what are you trying to say by that, Levi?”

“I’m trying to say, four-eyes, that I’m going to clean your shit of an apartment.”

“Levi, no, no, no!” Hange walked up to him, waving her hands around. “You can’t do this!”

“Of course, I can, I have to. I won’t be able to fall asleep, knowing that my friend lives in such dirt.”

Hange involuntary smiled at Levi’s words. The way Levi casually called her a friend made her heart swell with fondness.

“Levi, c’mon,” Hange still tried to argue. “You’ve done enough for me already, you don’t have to clean my apartment as well.”

“Who told you I was going to do it alone?” Levi raised his eyebrow. “Your messy ass will help me. Go and fetch me a broom and a mop.”

Hange sighed, rubbing her forehead. “Is there any way I can stop you?”

“Don’t be an idiot, Hange.” Levi replied, not even looking at her as he already started to sort out her clothes.

Hange cursed quietly, as she walked out of the room to go look for the items Levi asked to retrieve. It’s going to be a very long night…

                                                         ***    

When Levi deemed their cleaning finally finished, Hange was ready to collapse. Which she did, sprawling onto her sofa.

Levi sat next to her. He didn’t look tired at all - on the contrary, there was a seemingly pleased expression on his face.

Hange had never seen Levi look so happy.

“Jesus, you’re definitely a clean-freak,” Hange sighed, turning her head to look at him.

Levi shrugged, unfazed by Hange’s insult. “You should thank me, four-eyes. Now your apartment looks like a place, where lives a human being, and not some sort of wild animal.”

“Whatever.” Hange replied, too tired to continue arguing.

Her hand reached over to her mug, and Hange was devastated to find out that their tea had long since grown cold.

“Oh, I should probably make another tea for us,” she said, closing her eyes. She would lie here just for a moment, and then she would get up and head to the kitchen.

A moment later, though, Hange was already asleep.

                                                          ***    

Hange woke up with a groan. The sun was shining too brightly, and Hange moved to shield her eyes.

She tried to raise her hand, but she couldn’t, something holding it tightly in one place.

Hange’s brows furrowed in confusion, as she tried to understand what was going on.

Firstly, the curtains in her room always protected her from the morning light, so how come she was woken up by a bright sunshine? Hange slowly opened her eyes and saw that she wasn’t lying in her bed.

She suddenly remembered last night’s events. She probably fell asleep on her sofa, too exhausted to move to her bed. But if she was sleeping on the sofa, then where was Levi? Did he go home?

Hange turned her head and immediately found an answer to her question. Levi was sitting on the sofa, his eyes closed. His hand was wrapped tightly around Hange’s shoulder as her head lied on his knees.

Hange felt her cheeks burn with embarrassment. For the first time in her life, she didn’t know what to do.

Obviously, she needed to get up, but she didn’t want to wake Levi up. She wasn’t sure if she could look him in the eyes after he realizes that they fell asleep on each other.

But then Hange looked up at the clock on the wall, and all embarrassing thoughts left her mind. It was almost nine o’clock and that meant she was late for work!

Hange shot up to her feet, put on her glasses and ran to the wardrobe, searching for a change of clothes.

Her sudden movements raised Levi from his slumber. He rubbed his eyes, staring at Hange in confusion.

“Hange?” he asked, his voice husky from the sleep.

Hange closed her eyes, trying not to think about Levi’s obviously gorgeous voice.

“Hi!” she awkwardly waved at him, glancing at him briefly. Hange furiously shifted through her clothes, trying to restrain herself from turning around to look at Levi again. His morning bedhead was so adorable!

“I’m sorry, I would have offered you a breakfast, but I’m really late for work!” Hange explained hurriedly.

“It’s fine. My shift at the café starts soon as well. Can I use your shower, though?”

“Of course!” Hange smiled at him, grabbing her clothes and then hurrying to her bedroom to change.

                                                        ***    

They exited Hange’s apartment and then walked together until they reached the café. There their paths diverged, and after briefly hugging Levi, Hange rushed to her work.

Levi stood on a street, watching Hange until her lanky figure disappeared from his view. He sighed and then opened the door, entering the café.

And the first thing he saw inside was Mike’s grinning face.

“Well?” he asked smugly, crossing the hands on his broad chest and looking down at Levi. “Should I congratulate you?”

Levi stared at him, obviously confused. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

“About you and Hange finally getting your shit together and admitting your feelings for each other!”

Levi felt a blush appearing on his cheeks. He pushed Mike away, walking further into café.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He muttered under his nose.

“There is no need to be ashamed!” Mike laughed. “And there is no need to deny it,” he continued, following after Levi. “You walked in here in the yesterday’s clothes and,” Mike leaned in, sniffing Levi. “You smell like Hange.”

Levi narrowed his eyes, looking at Mike in disgust. “Are you a fucking dog?”

Levi’s words made Mike laugh again. “She just has a very distinctive smell. Had it since childhood. Besides, I’ve seen you two through the window, you can’t deny it. So,” Mike clasped his giant hand on Levi’s shoulder. “Tell me how it went.”

Before Levi could open his mouth to tell Mike to fuck off, Erwin walked in. His eyebrows were raised high, as he gave Levi an impressive look.

“I wasn’t expecting you two to confess so quickly,” he admitted, shaking his head.

“I told you Hange wouldn’t dance around for too long,” Mike argued. “It was Hange, who made the first move, right?” he asked Levi.

For a long moment, Levi stared at them in disbelief. He expected something like that from Mike, but Erwin? Going behind his back to gossip about his personal life? And his relationship with Hange?!

Honestly, Levi didn’t know what was going on between him and Hange. When he woke up today, with his hands wrapped around Hange, he felt strangely relaxed. He didn’t feel awkward or embarrassed. Waking up next to Hange felt almost natural, as though it’s how the things were meant to be.

Sleeping next to Hange felt good, and Levi couldn’t remember the last time he slept so soundly.

Levi knew what he felt for Hange, no matter how much he tried to deny it at first. He knew that he liked her more than just a friend, but he had no idea how Hange felt about him. Was he just a friend for her or something more?

But Levi always stopped himself there, there was no way Hange could actually see him as something more, she was funny and smart, she could find someone ten times better than Levi. Someone whose mind didn’t freeze every time they talked about feelings, someone who could use their words to express how much they admire and treasure Hange, and how much better their life became, when she decided to enter it.

Just thinking about this, Levi’s head began to hurt. Feelings and all this romantic shit was such a pain in the ass! And now Erwin and Mike were bothering him about it!

“Nothing happened,” Levi gritted between his teeth, glaring at the two blondes. “I walked her home, because she forgot her umbrella, and then she invited me for a cup of tea. Her apartment was a fucking mess, so I started cleaning it. We got tired and then fell asleep. End of the story.” He said with warning in his voice, staring at Mike and daring him to say something.

“Well, that does sound like the truth,” Erwin chuckled. “So our bet is still on, Mike.”

Levi widened his eyes, as he stared up at Erwin, not believing he had actually heard everything correctly. Erwin and Mike made a bet? About him and Hange? What a couple of fucking assholes.

“You are fucking morons.” Levi muttered darkly, prompting Mike and Erwin to start laughing.

Levi rolled his eyes, paying them no mind, and went to the closet to grab his cleaning supplies. At least someone in this shithole had to start working, and not just stand around, gossiping like a pair of schoolgirls.

                                                         ***    

“No, Hange, that’s not how you do it,” Levi sighed, slapping Hange’s hand away for the tenth time today.

He agreed to give her another piano lesson, and was beginning to regret it. Hange’s сhildhood teachers were right, she was terrible at music. But still, Levi patiently continued to show her the same few notes again and again.

“You press the keys too hard, you need to do it gently,” Levi told her.

Looking at Hange’s confused face, Levi rose from his seat and came to stand behind Hange. He put his hands on top of hers.

“You press them like that,” he whispered into Hange’s ear, gently guiding her hands.

“Alright,” Hange nodded and Levi had probably imagined the slight shivering in her voice. “Yeah, I think I got it.”

“Okay,” Levi agreed, moving away from Hange. He briefly squeezed her shoulder, before sitting next to her on the bench.

Hange put her hands on the piano, repeating the short melody Levi tried to teach her.

Levi’s eyes widened, when she recreated it almost perfectly, her fingers moving confidently across the keyboard.

“That was… good,” Levi said in the same disbelieving voice. “It was really good, Hange.”

“You actually think so?” Hange asked, her lips already curving into a smile.

Levi nodded, a small smile appearing on his lips as well.

“Yay!” Hange threw her hands in the air. “I’m finally managed to do it right!”

Then Hange wrapped her hands around Levi’s neck, pressing him close to her. “That’s all thanks to you, Levi!” Hange exclaimed in a really loud voice. Levi would have moved away from her and reprimanded her for being so nosy, but being so close to Hange, inhaling her faint scent and feeling her warmth, was… good. Levi didn’t wish for her to move away.

A couple of moments later, though, Hange pulled away from him. She didn’t move too far, still keeping her hands around his neck, as she gazed softly at him.

Levi felt himself slowly drowning in the depth of her beautiful brown eyes.

“You are an excellent teacher, Levi,” Hange whispered.

She was so close, Levi could count all of her eyelashes. He suddenly noticed faint freckles on her cheeks, and a slight smile tugged on Levi’s lips as he looked closely at them.

When Levi looked up, returning his gaze to Hange’s eyes, he found out that she was actually looking on his lips.

Did she… Did she want to kiss him? Could it be that she was feeling the same as him?

Hange kept staring at his lips, and Levi leaned in slightly, silently giving Hange the permission to kiss him.

Levi closed his eyes, his heart beating wildly in his chest, as he waited for Hange to finally connect her lips with his.

However, a second later Hange untangled herself completely from him. Levi opened his eyes, staring at her in confusion.

In the meanwhile, Hange swiftly got to her feet and was already turning away from Levi.

“I… I need to go home!” she exclaimed, sounding cheerful, but Levi heard the nervousness in her voice. “I suddenly remembered I… I left the stove on! Yes! So, yeah, see you later, Levi!”

Hange almost ran out of the café, while Levi sat still, staring at her retreating form.

He broke out of his daze, when he heard the sound of the door closing after Hange.

Shooting up from his seat, Levi ran after her.

He caught up with her a minute later, and grabbing her wrist, Levi dragged into the alleyway behind the café.

“What the fuck, Hange?” Levi asked furiously. “Why do you keep running away from me?”

Levi was sure, he was sure Hange felt something for him. Why else she would be staring at his lips so intently, if she had no desire to kiss them?

“I’m not running away!” Hange protested, taking a few steps away from Levi. “I… just really need to go home.”

“Do I look like an idiot who would believe this bullshit?” Levi growled. “Just tell me the truth, goddamn it! If I’m making you uncomfortable, just say so!”

“You’re not making me uncomfortable,” Hange fiercely denied. “You’re making me way too comfortable, and that’s what scares me.” Her voice became quiet, almost a whisper, and Hange lowered her head, not able to look at Levi’s face, which was so unusually full of emotions.

“Hange…” Levi made a small, tentative step towards her. He wanted to take another one, wanted to reach Hange and hold her in his arms, but he didn’t want to scare her. “Back at the café… What did you want to do? Just tell me, Hange.”

Hange shook her head. “I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Because if I do, then it will ruin everything. It will ruin our friendship and you’ll start to hate me.”

“Nonsense.” Levi’s fierce voice made Hange raise her head to look at him. He was staring right at her, his grey eyes burning with intensity. “There is nothing, nothing, you can do that would make me hate you. And I promise you, I swear to you, Hange,” he took another step towards her, finally coming close enough to grab her hand. He raised it to his lips, pressing a quick kiss to her knuckles. “That I would never stop considering you my friend.”

Hange gazed at him, completely speechless. Her hand burned, where Levi’s lips touch it. Hange wanted to feel those lips on hers, she wanted it so badly, more than anything in this world.

And looking in Levi’s eyes, his beautiful grey eyes that gazed so softly at her right now, Hange couldn’t lie to him. So she closed her eyes and took a deep breath, preparing for her next words.

“I wanted to kiss you.”

Hange didn’t dare to open her eyes, to look at Levi’s obviously disgusted and disappointed face.

But suddenly Hange felt Levi’s hands on her cheeks. She tentatively opened her eyes and met Levi’s gentle gaze.

“You wanted to kiss me?” he asked slowly.

Hange nodded, not trusting her voice right now.

“Do you… do you still want to kiss me?”

Hange’s eyes widened as she heard a slight nervousness in Levi’s voice.

She again nodded in agreement, and Levi took a deep breath.

“Alright,” he said more to himself than to her. “So if I were to kiss you right now, would that be okay?”

“More than okay.” Hange finally found her voice, her heart beginning to beat faster.

“Oh, okay. Then,” Levi looked at her face critically. “I’m going to kiss you. Right now. Is that still okay?”

Hange quietly chuckled, amused by Levi’s anxiety. “You don’t have to do it, if you don’t want to.” she told him with a smile.

“No, I want to,” Levi stubbornly replied. “I wanted to do it for a very long time.”

Hange was shocked to hear this. Did Levi really feel the same way as her? All this time?

“Are you serious?” she asked.

“No, all of it had been a part of my very elaborate prank,” Levi rolled his eyes. “You know how much I like pranking people, four-eyes.”

Hange gave him a light shove, giggling. “You’re such an asshole, Levi!”

“Yes, I am,” Levi told her seriously. “I’m a rude asshole, who is incapable of talking about his feelings, and hides his true emotions behind insults.”

“Mm, and you’re also a horrible clean-freak.” Hange added.

“Yeah, you still want to kiss me?”

“Well, that depends. Do you want to kiss a messy, loud and slightly crazy scientist in stupid glasses?”

“Very much so.”

“Alright then,” Hange leaned in, her lips hovering inches away from Levi’s. “Still haven’t changed your mind?”

“Goddamn it, Hange,” Levi growled, grabbing her by the back of her head and crushing their lips in a passionate kiss.

Hange moved her hands to Levi��s shoulders, bringing him even closer to her.

They continued to kiss until they were out of breath. When they broke apart, Hange grinned at Levi, staring at his slightly flushed face and red lips.

“That wasn’t such a bad kiss,” Hange commented, leaning in for another one.

“That was a very good kiss!” Hange and Levi suddenly heard a very familiar voice.

They turned around and saw Mike and Erwin. They wore identical smug grins, as they stared at Hange and Levi with amused eyes.

“I didn’t know you were such a good kisser, Levi!” Mike shouted, chuckling at the furious expression on Levi’s face. “Hange, did you enjoy it? Was it better than that time when I kissed you on a bet when we were kids?”

Ignoring Levi’s curious (and slightly disgusted) stare, Hange laughed. “Literally any kiss is better than that one, Mike!” she replied, grinning at her friend.

“Were you two really watching us this whole time?” Levi grumbled.

“We had a bet!” Mike argued. “We needed to find out who was the winner.”

“Oh?” Hange looked up. “And who was?”

“Are you serious, Hange?” Levi hissed. “Those two were spying on us like a pair of fucking creeps.”

“That’s because they are a pair of fucking creeps,” Hange shrugged. “And I want to know who the winner was.”

“Well, Hange was technically the one, who confessed first,” Mike began.

“But Levi was the one who kissed her,” Erwin protested. “And if it wasn’t for Levi running after Hange, they would be continuing this pining nonsense for another couple of month.”

“Fine, you’re right.” Mike shook his head, looking at Hange. “You’ve disappointed me. I thought you would be the one to make the first move, and not our angry shorty.”

“Jesus Christ!” Levi shouted. “Can you two morons just leave us alone already?”

“Alright, alright, we’re leaving,” Erwin said, chuckling. Mike obviously wanted to add something else, but Erwin grabbed him by the hand, leading him away.

Levi released a sigh when the door closed behind them.

“Fucking assholes.” He muttered under his breath.

“Oi, don’t be such a grump,” Hange teased him, softly ruffling his hair.  

“Whatever,” Levi grumbled.

In the next second, he wrapped his hands around Hange’s waist looking up at her with a smirk.

“I think we should continue where we left off. Would you like to?”

“I would love to.” Hange replied, leaning in and pressing her lips to his.

As Levi kissed Hange, he thought that he would probably never get tired of doing this. He tangled his hand in her soft hair and felt her smile against his lips, and his mouth curved into his a smile of his own.

#levihan #levihan fanfiction #levi x hange #levi ackerman #hange zoe #my fics #this is so cheesy istg #snk #snk fanfiction

[sebastianshaw]

RP Meme from The Lost Boys

I told you to stay off the boardwalk.

Hey, I liked that song.

I don't see any boogeymen or nasty guys.

Wait. That's from my era!

That's the ocean air.

Smells like someone died.

Looks like he's dead. No, he's just a deep sleeper.

If he's dead, can we go back to [PLACE]?

What's wrong with this picture? There's no TV. Have you seen a TV? I haven't seen a TV.

You're the only woman I ever knew who didn't improve her situation by getting divorced.

A big legal war wasn't going to improve anybody's situation.

Ouch. My hair.

Talk about the Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

We've got some rules around here. Second shelf is

mine. That's where I keep my root beers and my double-thick Oreo cookies. Nobody touches the second shelf but me.

There's another rule around here, and I want you to pay

close attention. Don't touch anything. Everything is exactly where I want it.

There are some bad elements around here.

You're telling me we've moved to the murder capital of the world?

If all the corpses buried around here were to stand up all at once we'd have one hell of a population problem.

I just like to read the TV Guide. Read the TV Guide, you don't need a TV.

I was so worried. Don't run off like that.

We were that age, too, once. Only they dress better.

You have a generous nature. I like that in a person.

So how may I help you this evening? We have it all.

I look that needy, huh?

You're chasing that girl, aren't you?

I'm at the mercy of your sex glands.

Don't you have something better to do than follow me around all night?

Just scoping your civilian wardrobe.

Listen buddy, if you're looking for the diet frozen-yogurt bar, it went out of business last summer.

That's a very serious book, man.

Only five in existence.

Where the hell are you from? Krypton?

Nobody drives this baby but me.

We have to let it warm up a little. Hear that sound? Just like a baby pussycat.

That's as close to town as I like to get.

It's a pretty cool place. If you're a Martian. Or a vampire.

Are you guys sniffing old newsprint or something?

You think you really know what's happening here, don't you? Well, I'll tell you something. You don't know shit buddy.

This is just our cover. We are dedicated to a higher

purpose. We're fighters for Truth Justice, and the American

way.

Think of it more as a survival manual.

There's our number on the back and pray you never need to call us.

I'll pray I never need to call you.

If you want your ear pierced, I'll do it.

I came this close to being called Moon Beam or Moon Child Or something like that.

I can't beat your bike.

You don't have to beat me, [NAME]. You just have to try

and keep up.

Just you! Come on! Just you!

That's what I love about this place. You ask, and then you get.

I can never sleep with the closet door open, either. Not even a crack.

Don't sneak up on people like that!

What, you don't like rice? Tell me [NAME], how could a

billion Chinese people be wrong? Come on!

You're eating maggots. How do they taste?

Sorry about that. No hard feelings, huh?

Drink some of this, [NAME]. Be one of us.

Give me those sunglasses.

You need sunglasses to talk on the phone?

Are you freebasing? Inquiring minds want to know.

Anything in here that might pass for after-shave?

Have a big date tonight, [NAME]?

Lose the earring, [NAME]. It's not you. It's definitely

not you.

All you do is give attitude lately.

Go take your bath.

What did you do to my dog, asshole?

I didn't hurt him. He bit me. This is my blood.

Why did he bite you, huh? What did you do to him?

He was protecting you.

Look at your reflection in the mirror. You're a creature of

the night, [NAME]. Just like out of a comic book.

My own brother/sister/friend/etc, a goddam shit-sucking vampire.

You wait 'til[NAME] finds out!

Just let me talk. Wait a minute! [NAME]!

You did the right thing by calling us.

Does the sunlight freak him out?

He wears sunglasses in the house.

He always had bad breath, though.

He's a vampire all right. Here's what you do.

I can't do that! He's my brother/sister/mother/friend/etc!

You better get yourself a garlic T-shirt, buddy. Or it's

your funeral.

I think we have to have a real long talk about something.

[NAME] help! He's coming to get me!

[NAME], help me! Open up! Help me! [NAME], open the window!

So what are you, the flying nun?

We're gonna work this out. We*re gonna work this out. Trust

me, okay?

I thought I saw something on my window, but I guess I got carried away.

I would like to have a personal life too.

Can I sleep in here with you tonight?

You smell like garlic.

What's happening to me, [NAME]?

I don't know how to help you.

Aren't we friends anymore?

Then let's act like friends. Let's talk.

We could talk about anything you want to talk about.

I have more serious things on my mind than girls and school. Things I'm dealing with.

Looks like I wasn't the only one who got lucky last night.

The dog chased my mom like the Hounds of Hell from Vampires

Everywhere.

We've been aware of some very serious vampire activity in

town for a long time.

[PLACE] has become a haven for the undead.

As a matter of fact, we're almost certain that ghouls and

werewolves occupy high position at City Hall.

Kill your brother/sister/boyfriend/aunt/best friend/etc, you'll feel better!

Look, it says here that if you kill the head vampire all half-vampires will return to normal.

Does he know who the head vampire is?

You'll have to kill him. And if you don't, we will.

Vampire require a daytime protector, a guardian to watch

over them as they sleep. Fierce dogs, the Hounds of Hell,

are often employed for this purpose.

Truth, Justice, The American way triumphs.

Smells good. When do we eat?

Are we gonna have company again?

Well, you are the man of the house and I'm not coming in until you invite me.

He promises to behave if you come back.

I didn't know you were having guests.

Our batting average isn't terrific, is it? Zero for two.

You're so sweet to him.

I don't know what got in to him. He's not like that.

If you ever want to see [NAME] again, you better come with

us now.

Initiation's over, [NAME]. Time to join the club.

Don't kill me, [NAME]. I'm basically a good kid, so just

don't kill me.

Just work with me and I can help you. You'll be okay.

Is she one of them?

You shut the window and lock your door.

She's one of them! And don't tell me it doesn't make her a

bad person, [NAME]!

Yes, and it's my fault. You would've not met me, if I

hadn't liked you. I tried to warn you.

You drank someone's blood? Are you crazy?

We're not them.

Why didn't you kill me last night?

You're supposed to be my first.

What are you doing here? What do you want from me?

Don't kill anybody until we get back to you!

I got connections.

The night crawler. The bloodsucker. El Vampiro.

I don't want you going down there.

Look, this isn't a comic book, [NAME]. These guys are

brutal killers.

Who'd you rather go down in with you? Them or me?

If something happens down there, I won't have the strength

to protect you.

This time I'll protect you.

Even though you're a vampire, you're still my brother/sister/friend/etc

If you try to stop us, or vamp out in any way, I'll stake

you without even thinking twice about it!

Where did you say you met these guys?

Don't you touch her. Stay away from her.

Flies and the undead go together like bullets and guns.

There must be coffins here someplace.

I thought they'd be in coffins.

That's what this cave is. It's one giant coffin.

Right now they're at their most vulnerable. Easy pickings.

Remember. You just have to kill the leader.

We don't know which one he is.

I guess we'll just have to kill them all.

What's that, a little vampire humor? It wasn't funny.

Good night, bloodsucker.

We blew it, man! We lost it!

We unraveled in the face of the enemy!

They pulled a mind-scramble on us!

We don't ride with vampires.

"Burn rubber" does not mean warp speed!

Your dog knows a flesh-eater when he smells one.

The sun goes down. They'll be looking for us.

[PLACE] is crawling with vampires

They're coming to the house as soon as it gets dark!

I'm gonna see [NAME] tonight, and you're trying to ruin it for me.

I don't know what you don't want me to see.

I'm not talking about [NAME]! To hell with [NAME]!

Good. That's just the way we like it.

We've got a date tonight?

They'll be coming for all of us.

It's just old memories coming back.

Why are you so jumpy tonight?

He seemed so sincere, but it's insane.

Tell me. I promise not to laugh. Honest.

I think I should warn you all when a vampire dies, it's never a pretty sight.

Some yell and scream. Some go quietly. Some explode. Some implode. But all will try to take you with them.

Don't go out there! Stop him!

I say we terminate them right now.

You're mine. You killed [NAME]

Try the holy water, dead breath!

I nailed one of them downstairs with a bow and arrow.

We trashed the one that looked like Twisted Sister.

We totally annihilated his night stalkin' ass!

Death to all vampires!

We are awesome monster bashers!

Holy shit! The attack of Eddie Monster!

Stop! Get away from him! Just stay away from him! He's just

a little boy.

You're afraid to face me, [NAME]?

I tried to make you immortal.

You tried to make me a killer!

Stop fighting me, [NAME]. I don't want to kill you. Join us.

It is too late, my blood is in your veins.

Don't let them see me like this.

What happened to your face?

I knew it. You are the head vampire.

You're the secret [NAME] was protecting.

Don't ever invite a vampire into your house, you silly boy/girl/etc.

It renders you powerless.

Has everyone gone crazy? What's the matter with all of you?

It was you I was after, all along, [NAME]

It was all going to be so perfect, [NAME]

Just like one big happy family.

Great. The bloodsucking Brady Bunch.

I still want you, [NAME]. I haven't changed my mind about that.

I didn't invite you this time, [NAME]

Don't you touch my mother/father/son/dog/etc

Don't fight, [NAME]. It's so much better if you don't fight.

How much do you think we should charge them for this?

One thing about living in [PLACE] I never could

stomach--all the damn vampires.

#rp meme #rp memes #rp starters #roleplay meme #roleplay starters #roleplay memes #the lost boys #lost boys #my meme #my memes #my starters #out of shirt #okay to reblog

[fonteyn]

an update on where i’ve been

under the cut  is a long rant on which i’m getting some things off my chest.

I'm not sure if anyone is wondering, not sure if anyone even noticed, honestly, but I haven't posted or pretty much interacted here on Tumblr for at least a month now, my queue was running for a little bit but I got tired of filling it and eventually stopped posting at all. I've received a couple of messages and replies to the last chapter I posted on my Caspian fic asking about when I would update and I first of all feel I need to apologize for the long wait. The truth I found myself fighting with for the last couple of months is that actually....I'm not okay. 

I've been holding on for most of the pandemic, keeping myself busy, taking ballet classes and all, but then university came back and keeping up with the full schedule of classes, assignments and my internship (which demands about 30 hours every week) became very difficult and unfortunately sent me into a downwards spiral. 

One thing that has been constantly on my mind is that I have to get a new internship soon as my contract ends in March and I need the money from it to keep paying my bills and medication. In the last two months, I was rejected by every single one of the places I applied to (some of you might have seen other posts I made about this). 

I currently live with my parents, my brother and my boyfriend. My parents and sibling have created a war zone between them. They fight ALL THE TIME which is upsetting for too many reasons to number. I feel embarrassed that my s/o is subjected to watching this, he could live somewhere else but i think something tells him that if he did, I'd unravel too. 

Also, my dad, a lifelong alcoholic, has gone back to more hardcore drinking habits. He spent 2018 sober, but fell off the wagon in January 2019. He has done this many times before, drinking a little bit here and there, hiding from me and my mom, and becoming bolder as time goes on, which is how he is right now. Getting piss drunk every single day. This is not only saddening but also disruptive to me as he gets very touchy and mad about anything you tell him when he's intoxicated. He happens to be the kind of person who knows exactly what to say when he wants to hurt you. We argue. I scream. He says things to me that make me cry like a little girl. I feel powerless. I thought we were past this. Once I had a job and my own money, he seemed to respect me more, but when he's drunk he's right back to his old asshole self.

And then... well...the elephant in the room is coronavirus. I was feeling okay, not super paranoid for a long while but something clicked on me ever since my ballet teacher tested positive back in mid-October. Me and my partner also found out that some people whom we trusted were not being as safe as they had us believe, and now I don't want to go out EVER. I put so much alcohol on my hands every day that my skin is peeling. I clean everything, my shoes, the groceries, the car. I take a full body shower anytime I get home from a forced outing. I always wear a mask. My boyfriend also takes all the precautions. But as I said, I live with three more people, who don't have the same thoughts. Despite agreeing with the seriousness of the situation when I talk to them, they have varying degrees of protection. Yes, they wear masks. But my parents don't clean the groceries with alcohol. They don't take off their shoes when they get home. My mom cleans houses for work and doesn't wear a mask when she's at her employers as her shifts are long, and she usually ends up eating lunch there. Anyway, these are just a few quips. All of it makes me insanely anxious, so much so that I even though about moving out. But I don't have the financial stability necessary to do that as I won't have a job in three months (and this is not something I can negotiate bc there's a law in my country that you can't intern in the same place for over 2 yrs) and I need to pay my own bills (including my meds) and frequent blood tests cause - uuuuh - have i mentioned that I've been on an accutane course for six months?

It's all just been adding up. There are more weird petty things too, i guess.

I'm going into my last year of university and have no idea what to do next, I'm pretty sure I won't hold onto any college friends as even the fucking quarantine made them forget all about me (they hit me up only when they need material for a certain class we're taking). I feel alone and isolated, which i understand is something a lot of us are dealing with. I feel selfish knowing that I haven't had any major losses, and yet I feel so fucking sad all the time. The moment I realized I was definitely not okay was when I was crying as I wrote my tax law assignment. I haven't been better ever since.

If you are still reading after this nonsensical rant on which i exposed my private family life to strangers on the internet, i thank you for hearing me out.

If you're a reader of my fics, I'm sorry for not updating enter a king and a queen. I'm working on chapters, they will most likely be very long, probably longer than the previous ones. I will be taking my time, and hopefully I can get something out by mid January.

Uhh, I don't know how to finish this so....i guess...I'll see you when I see you.

Happy holidays, everyone. I wish health to you and all your loved ones 💕

#tw depression #tw anxiety #tw alchohol mention #covid19 #iz.txt

[ts1989fanatic]

The 16 Best Taylor Swift Songs to Listen to

It's hard to believe Taylor Swift has been famous for over a decade now—a staggering level of fame that has seen gossip, girl squads, and high-profile relationships come and go. Known for her narrative songwriting, Swift boasts a massive discography broken up into "eras" by her loyal fan base. From her early country beginnings to the dark pop of 2017's Reputation, here are the 16 best Taylor Swift songs.

1

"All Too Well"

Widely considered to be her magnum opus, "All Too Well" tells the cautionary tale of a romance gone terribly wrong. Listeners follow Swift and her lover (feverishly theorized to be Jake Gyllenhaal) as she paints a picture of domestic upstate bliss devastated by a breakup. The nearly six-minute track peaks halfway through, when Swift unravels and drops the line: "You call me up again just to break me like a promise / So casually cruel in the name of being honest." It's dramatic, hyper-specific, and gut-wrenching: Taylor at her finest.

2

"Our Song"

If any song sparks joy, the third single from Swift's eponymous debut album is it. Full of charming lyrics with an equally delightful music video (The tulle! The roses! The makeup and curls!), "Our Song" is a showy display of her burgeoning superstardom.

3

"Blank Space"

Described by Swift as an answer to the media's "psycho serial dater" narrative, "Blank Space" boasts lyrics like, "Got a long list of ex lovers, they'll tell you I'm insane," and "Darling, I'm a nightmare dressed like a daydream." Gone are the sweetly wide-eyed love songs: "Blank Space" is 100 percent biting cynicism.

4

"Enchanted"

An epic love song about the magical moment you first meet someone, "Enchanted" is wistful, dramatic, angsty, and...about Owl City's Adam Young??? Who later covered the song and professed his mutual enchantment???? But literally NOTHING came of it???????? I still have so many questions. It also launched one of her fandom's most beloved memes.

5

"Tim McGraw"

Taylor's debut single is an ode to the songs that transport us back in time. No wonder it cemented her status on country radio—the track bears the same name as country music megastar Tim McGraw, a ballsy and genius move for the then-newcomer.

6

"Last Kiss"

Whomst among us has not cried over their ex to "Last Kiss?" The tune is simple, with each loaded lyric sung in clipped phrases until Swift hits the drawn-out bridge: "I'll watch your life in pictures like I used to watch you sleep / I feel you forget me like I used to feel you breathe." Oof.

7

"Holy Ground"

The song that should've been a single but never was, "Holy Ground" opens with driving drums and the word vomit "I-was-reminiscing-just-the-other-day-while-having-coffee-all-alone-and-Lord-it-took-me-away," making it hard not to get swept up in Taylor's relationship nostalgia.

8

"You Belong With Me"

Unrequited love and high school pretty much go hand in hand, as illustrated in this Swift classic. There's something freeing about the melody that makes you want to sing it at the top of your lungs. One listen to the pleading lyrics "Why can't you seeeeee? You belong with meeeee," and suddenly it's 2009. Ah, simpler times!

9

"Shake It Off"

"My ex-man brought his new girlfriend, she's like 'Oh my god,' but I'm just gonna shake." That lyric? Could move mountains.

10

"Red"

Our songstress takes her favorite lip color and applies it to a whirlwind romance that's like "driving a new Maserati down a dead-end street." The bouncy tune is a bit coy, a bit romantic, and a full-on banger.

11

"The Way I Loved You"

Hidden on Fearless is this sleeper hit about dating a perfectly nice boy who turns out to be, well, boring as hell. Instead, an unimpressed Taylor daydreams about her ex and their batshit-cray romance of yesteryear, singing, "I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain." "Rollercoaster kind of rush," indeed.

12

"Style"

Pop legends Max Martin, Shellback, and Ali Payami join forces with Swift on this moody disco track. The impeccable production is backed by flirty lyrics like, "I got that good girl faith and a tight little skirt." After some back and forth ("I heard that you've been out and about with some other girl," she accuses; "What you heard is true, but I can't stop thinking about you," he admits), Swift throws caution to the wind with the "Take me home" coda.

13

"Picture to Burn"

The banjo! The country accent! The problematic lyrics that were thankfully changed! And who could forget the wonderfully terrible acting in this music video, featuring Taylor's IRL BFF Abigail Anderson.

14

"Delicate"

New relationships are a balancing act: You weigh how much you like someone against the real possibility of it all blowing up in your face. The stakes are high, and Swift knows that: "Is it cool that I said all that? Is it too soon to do this yet? 'Cause I know that it's delicate. Isn't it?"

15

"Wildest Dreams"

I live for The Drama™ and nothing is more Drama™ than the heartbeat intro, string orchestra, and old-glamour vibes of "Wildest Dreams." Makes me want to stand in a nice dress/stare at a sunset real bad.

16

"You Are in Love"

Bleachers’ Jack Antonoff helped out on this bonus track from 1989 (which is reportedly inspired by ex-girlfriend Lena Dunham). Swift sings about a relationship that’s stable and sure—a contrast from her previous stormy love songs. Focusing on details like “The light reflects the chain on your neck” and “He keeps a picture of you in his office downtown,” Taylor reminds us it’s the little things that can make us fall for a person.

ts1989fanatic did your favourite make the list, mine did my #1 Taylor song came in at #15

[hweiro]

So I just finished chapter 9 of Could Be The One (to set you free), and I'm sitting here flailing because feels and stuff! Thank you so much for this fic! I've been insanely curious, though, as to what kinds of powers the court at Karasuno had when they still had them. Would you be able to share this with us? Thank you again!

Heyo! (ﾉ^ヮ^)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧

Yay for you flailing over Chapter 9 and enjoying it! Honestly, I surprised even myself when I ended up squeeing over it as well during the editing/rechecking process. I actually messaged my beta-reader, going ‘OMG, I actually like this!??’ #truestory I usually have what I call ‘post-posting-regret’, where I wail over my incompetency in writing/plotting/creating convincing settings/vocabulary/etc. for ages; it was a refreshing change to actually like something off the get-go. *laughs* (Though…I still feel like I over-abused commas quite a bit…)

And ooh, Karasuno’s back-story! I didn’t actually set every single Karasuno members’ power, but here’s a mini-list of the tiny head-canon I kept at the back of my mind in case I needed it to explain stuff:

- Sawamura: king’s perogative + affinity with the earth- Sugawara: yousei (Japanese fairy); golem creation- Nishinoya: shape-shifter/crow; the ability to find anything- Tsukishima: amabiko (merman); precognition to a certain extent- Ennoshita: land spirit (similar to Kindaichi)- Tanaka: Tengu- Kageyama: mountain spirit; grants wishes

I also sketched a quick outline of Hinata’s creation, which was derived from ‘Pinocchio’. In an effort to create something that would be capable of holding massive amounts of magic (a ‘container’), Sugawara creates Hinata from the earth taken from the back of the Little Giant (the ‘founder’ of Karasuno). However, neither he nor Sawamura could figure out how to give him the humanity necessary to render him alive enough to accept the king’s prerogative transfer. Hinata’s only wish is to be a ‘real’ person; he doesn’t understand the urgency and desperation of the people who created him, nor does he actually care much about his role in saving Karasuno. After a heated argument with one of the court members, he runs away and stumbles across Kageyama’s mountain. (At this point, Kageyama is not considered a part of Karasuno’s court.) (Note: Hinata constantly bugs Kageyama to ‘grant my wish to be alive!’ Kageyama always retorts unliving things don’t get to make wishes.)Hinata learns to understand the strengths and weaknesses of being human while ‘staying’ with Kageyama (because he doesn’t know how to tell Kageyama ‘who’ he is and where he came from). Despite constantly threatening to unravel/dismantle Hinata, Kageyama finds himself falling in love with the short golem, to his dismay. Hinata now feels guilty; he knows he has to go back (because of his newly developed conscience), but he doesn’t want to leave Kageyama.When the magic curse strikes Kageyama, he uses the last of his power to grant Hinata’s wish to be a real person. Panicked, Hinata rushes Kageyama’s body back to Karasuno with him, where Sawamura discovers that Hinata is now ‘alive’ - in granting Hinata’s wish, Kageyama had transferred his life into Hinata. Karasuno is on the edge of crumbling, so Hinata steps up to the plate and does what he knows Kageyama would want him to do: he takes all the magic of Karasuno into him. Before Sawamura seals him though, Hinata manages to use the magic to shove half of his life back into Kageyama, essentially creating that life-sharing Oikawa eventually does with Iwaizumi. Kageyama lives, is adopted into Karasuno’s high court at Hinata’s insistence, and…clearly things go well, considering how Karasuno is in the whole Seijou situation. :3cFootnote: much later, Sugawara will discover that this is an old form of magic that isn’t limited to Japan; it is often performed between magical/non-magical beings to allow the human to live with the magical creature past their natural lifespans.….as you can see, I sometimes have huge-ass headcanons. xD;;; It’s a shame none of the above could really be featured in ‘Could Be the One’ (it would have drawn the focus away from the main story, for one). I toyed with the idea of writing this into another fic, but I haven't ever written KageHina, and I have a backlog of things to work on at the moment.Sorry for this essay of a reply! I tend to get very excited about the details I try to work into my stuff (when I bother planning them), and as you can tell, I really liked the KageHina backstory that Never Was. xD Thanks once again for reading my fic! *bows*

#akeanswers #anonymous #fanfic #i...can get very sidetracked at times #and overly meticulous #this is really long omg #no chill #i should probably link this in the epilogue #fic: could be the one (to set you free) #headcanon