Tumgik
#even though i almost always end up doing the “5-minute tasks” for hours. like scrolling through tumblr or youtube shorts and shit
rubys-domain · 5 months
Text
i really have to motivate myself to finish the thelxie event fast or it's just going to end with no freminet on my alt account
#⇢₊˚⊹ 🩷∥ruby∥yo,ide yo !!#it's not that i hated the event per se#i'm just really not in a genshin mood these days#i reached a milestone irl,but that doesn't mean i can afford to relax and play a game for hours on end#which is how i prefer to play this game. i want to sit somewhere comfy and comb through the world with the interactive map#for combat players that might sound like the biggest slog of all time#but i think it's a nice,chill way to play. the world was created to be enjoyed after all#unfortunately i'm very susceptible to falling into “waiting mode”#so anything that registers in my brain as “time-consuming” gets put on the metaphorical top shelf (out of reach)#and then i can't bring myself to do anything that doesn't feel like i could be done with in 5 minutes#even though i almost always end up doing the “5-minute tasks” for hours. like scrolling through tumblr or youtube shorts and shit#there's also other reasons but i don't like talking about those much#suffice it to say that i'm in a weird place in my life rn where i can *technically* relax but i still feel like i can't#i've also been sleeping so much. to the point where it feels like my waking hours are being sacrificed for too much sleep#i really am getting older huh. it doesn't feel that long ago when i was a kid and had the exact opposite problem#tbh my current problem saddens me way more. i don't want to sleep any more than absolutely necessary#because then it feels like i'm sleeping my life away. it's almost surprising how shitty that actually feels#i feel like taking a fucking nap right now even. it feels crazy that this would bring me to tears but it does#it feels like my life didn't get any less pathetic. just pathetic in a different way
1 note · View note
btswishes · 3 years
Text
Love me for who I am now
Tumblr media
Bucky x Reader ( Chapter 1 )
Part1 / Next 
Summary: You apply for the Stark internship and end up getting it, so now you have 5 months to make a good impression to continue working with the Avengers.
A/N: This is my first Marvel fic and I am taking it as a challenge. It is opposite of what my account was made, but here I go. Sorry for any mistakes made, hope you enjoy it even a tiny bit.
Word count:  3,281
Warmings: fights, harsh language, not part of the original MCU 
Y/N- Your name Y/L/N:  Your Last Name
                                   --------------------------------------
  Through sleepless nights and dark circles, books and pens, through months of work you reached your goal. The moment you received the acceptance letter from Stark University you almost flew out the window without a fear in your mind. This was it!
  Time had passed since that moment, but it is still engraved in your mind- a memory keeping you strong during the hard midterms and piles of work, even the small glimmers of regret. Trying your best wasn’t an option, you could do only that and no less. It was no easy task, lost social life as much as you tried to keep it. You were really lucky you had good friends that understood and supported you. University wasn’t easy for anyone making this one even tougher. People of all ages, backgrounds and cultures were piled up with you in this building. The best of the best as the slogan said, the ones that proved themselves and emerged victorious.
  When you were young ,you used to spend a lot of time with your uncle at his places outside the country. He would introduce you to his work colleagues and things you had never seen before. There was a time where you would spend months on end with him. Not many memories were left from those moments in your head. At one point you spend a few years with him, your mother thought it would be good experience for you and it turned out to be nothing but the truth-at least you hoped so. You learned a lot from him and his friends, it felt like each spend day would offer you more knowledge in areas you never knew of. Computer work, ways of thinking and so much more that had become second nature to you.
  The sky was tinted in a wash of oranges, reds and yellows bleeding one into the other, swirling around the sun emitting them. The day was ending, but you found yourself filling up an application in the library, covered by the silence and smell of exam worry.
  Sponsored and founded by the one and only Tony Stark, this establishment offered an internship. Being part of the Avengers, Tony didn’t let just anyone from the students attending in, even if they were the best labeled by the school. It had been a year and a half since you started pushing yourself harder to be able to apply and there was nothing that could stop you. Pressing your finger over the enter button was very nerve wrecking yet simple. Even if it didn’t work out this year, you planned to do it again and again ,till he had no other choice but give you a chance.
  Usually F.R.I.D.A.Y. went over everything and left only the applications worth going over by Tony himself or Pepper. The next 5 weeks for you were very stressful, but there was nothing more you could do but wait and focus on your own work. The first person you wanted to tell about this was your uncle. He went to work in some distant place where they had no internet so you switched to mail. Not as much paper under his name passed through your hands, as he had stopped answering you. You missed him, but the muddy childhood memories kind of compensated for that.
“Did you send it in?” the phone muffled a bit the sweet voice coming from the speaker 
“Yeah, a few days ago actually.” You answered with a gentle sigh
“And no answer yet?” the girl’s pitch rose at the end of the sentence, amazed at that what she just heard
“I know, I know. Think about it though Nea. Who knows how many applications get submitted. Someone has to brush through them after all.” defending the situation was a form of coping for you, made you feel hopeful.
“So you are trying to tell me Tony Stark’s interface or whatever it’s called, can’t sort them out in a couple of hours? Come on Y/N! You and I both know you are trying to make yourself feel better.” The small pause made you anxious over what Nea said “Listen.” A breathy start of the sentence “ I don’t mean to brag, but I think I am one of the people who know exactly how much you deserve this. You were never the studious type, plus that you were gone for years on end with that mysterious uncle of yours. I never expected you to suddenly go for Stark University. Your dream changed you, from this quiet kid to crazy ol’ you right now on the call with me.I ain’t letting you bust yourself up over this just because it didn’t happen the first time around-”
                Ding ding
  Nea’s deep speech was cut off before she could unleash herself completely, by the slight ring of your phone’s notification.
“Who tf has the audacity to text while the great me is giving this legendary –“
                Ding!
  The second time the sound sung out made her choke up with anger, you could almost see the fumes coming out of the phone.
“WHO IS IT!” a loud hiss pierced your ear
“Maybe if you gave me a minute I could answer your question.” Pulling the call down, your finger ran over the screen to the email, making your notification lamp blink like a car. Almost instantly it opened before your eyes and you gasped. The action made you swallow suddenly and cough out a bit ,giving poor Nea an idea about the level of shock you were in.
“What?What? You can’t just almost die and not tell me what is going on.” She proceeded with a not so tasteful interrogation.
“I-…they accepted my application…” at the end a small smile flowed over your lips contorting the sound coming out
“Stop!?” she choked up as well “You gotta be fucking with me!? No fucking way this is real!”
“I am honest. It says here that they liked my skill set, my grades and the way of thinking I presented in my essay. I got the spot Nea! I fucking did it!” you threw the phone on the bed letting it bounce as you started dancing.
“Of course you did! I told you! You will be working with THE AVENGERSSSS!” at some point it sounded like your best friend was more excited than you “When do you start?”
“Well…” taking a second to calm down and re-establish contact with your phone, you looked up the schedule that came attached with the email “…ok…so it says here that I will be starting on Monday so~ in 2 days? “
“So soon! Any requirements for the job miss Avenger’s sidekick?” and the teasing begins
“A list, surprisingly.” Rolling onto your back, you held the screen away and above your face, scrolling past “ I guess my first job will be with Dr. Banner in the lab. Apparently I will be given some sort of assignments throughout the 5 months work span. I will be monitored by Dr. Bruce Banner and the grading, I guess if you can call It that ,will be done by Tony Stark himself.”
“Basically Hulk will be your babysitter.” once this girl starts teasing she never stops even in amazing situations such as this one, good thing you loved her “That sounds so cool though! You will be able to meet Captain America and Black Widow~! I am so jelly of you I swear! When you leave work make sure to wait for someone from the group to walk by, omgggg I am fangirling so much right now.What if you go to dinners with them!?AAAAA!”
“Fun thing about that.” Your eyes landed on the last paragraph of the email “It says here that I am supposed to move into the compound and stay there till further notice. The whole idea is that if I do things well I will get a permanent job. Weird…” you hummed
“Weird !? How? That is so cool! Who knows you might even become an Avenger! You will be living with them anyways.” at this point Nea was either not breathing or hyperventilating so fast you couldn’t hear it
“Don’t be ridiculous.” your attention landed once more on the thought process you had a moment ago “I don’t get one thing. They say here that my PE grades combined with my IT and overall studies make me a great candidate, but I don’t remember sports being a requirement at all, or even providing them in the first place. Does it mean that if my grades were low in that department I wouldn’t have gotten the spot?”
“I guess people of science aren’t that flexible. Who cares anyways! You got in, no ifs and buts. I am telling you, at this point you could be an Avenger.” poor girl began thinking of names and suit designs for you “ Hurry up and pack those bags before I drop by with take away, so we can gossip over Steve Rogers’s abs.”
“Um…don’t get me wrong he is super hot, I just see the Cap more like an older brother figure than anything.” It was true, you looked up to him since the first time you studied about the Civil War. Fearless, gave his life in a way for his people, astonishing man over all.
“Hey! Let me drool over him! You were always more of a Winter Soldier fan anyways.” Nea pouted audibly . Her words made some lone memory pop up in your head, but it was as murky as the rest. “I don’t know why I am interested in him. Somehow his look is very nostalgic and rugged. Anyways. ”you shook your head out of the mental image of the soldier “I will go pack up, tell my parents and fix up all my documents. Probably find some stuff from former Stark employees online. I want to have a bit of an idea of what he expects and what I am getting myself into.”
“Fine fine, you could have just said you like troubled guys. You were the one who was happy Loki got a second chance after all. I will be over in like 3 hours.” She informed you
“Hey! He deserved to redeem himself, he was used!” a firm Loki supporter as always “Ok then, see ya.”
   Hanging up the call you placed your phone to charge and rolled off your bed. The email gave vague information about what you needed, but clothing wise you would still be able to come home and get stuff if you had to. What was on top of your priorities were papers, documents, all your research materials and tech. Those things had to be organized no matter what ,since they got you this far in the first place.
  Nae came over as planned and you two had a nice sleepover talking about you know who. The night came and left, letting the morning find you in your bed at 11am. Your forearm rested on top of your forehead in a relaxed manner, letting enough space for an exhale to linger in the air in front of you. Your mind was going over everything that was about to happen to you. It was one of your dreams, you worked for it nonstop day in day out, so why were you so worried about meeting the rest of the Avengers? Maybe it was just anxiety or fear of the unknown, yeah made sense.
  All you did during the day was make lists for every piece of tech you were binging with yourself. Things seemed to be in order, but worry kept nibbling on your bones. The moment of truth finally rolled up and so did your suitcase in front of your house. Nea came to send you off as she promised.
“Sweetie, make sure to call us every day. Eat well, don’t overwork yourself and-“ your mom went off with caution about anything and everything that came to mind
“Mom, you know I am going 3 blocks down from here right? Plus I can come home at any time I want to. I am not moving to Mars or getting arrested.” You smirked the panic away from her, giving them a big hug.
“Call me or text me when you get there.” Nea pulled you in, whispering in your ear as quietly as possible “And don’t forget to sneak me a booty pick of good ol’Cap. You know what they say-”
“That is America’s ass.” Your voice came out in a mocking tone
“That i-…let me at least finish it by myself! Geez!” she pushed you towards the door “Ok ok, go now before you spoil me something else” her arms crossed in front of her chest
  The walk wasn’t that long, you were too invested in your own thoughts to notice when the time and distance had passed. The glistening windows of the compound building shined into your eyes. Your lungs filled up with a breath that they kept in for a moment, before releasing it back in the outside world. Pulling out the documents you stepped in. The fresh smelling air hit you making you close one eye for a second.
People were walking around you fast and concentrated. Some looked in a hurry, others were on break with a cup of coffee and a strain-leaving expression.
 Your feet, as slightly shaky as they were, took you right up to the front desk were a lady with a dark rich red colored uniform looked at you. She flashed a professional smile, her eyes asking for your purpose.
“Um, hello. My name is Y/N -Y/L/N.” she saw the logo on your papers and gasped
“You must be the new intern Mr. Stark told us about.” She signed something and reached out “Can you give me your hand for a second.” Your fingers didn’t go past the surface of the desk when she pocked your skin. Pulling in your extremity, your palm wrapped around the spot that began to sting a bit “Don’t worry about it. This is your identification pass. Fancy, no?” she smiled winking. Her body stood up as she pointed at the elevator far in the back of the foyer.
  Instructions were given with each step of the way, calming your nerves a bit. The moment you found yourself inside the elevator she pulled your hand to the sensor on the wall next to the buttons.
Recognized: Code 2514. Welcome Miss Y/N  
 Your head shot up when F.R.I.D.Y.’s voice echoed in the small space. The women smiled giving you a small nod and stepped out of the vicinity. Once her body was outside ,the doors slid closed. Over them glowed a protective blue light layering over the material like a soft veil.
 It felt like you weren’t moving an inch. Your body flinched when the sun stung at your eyes from the window. Your gaze landed over the view of the city, as you went higher and higher, ascending into the clouds  The blues and yellows were covering the inside of the elevator, such vibrant and lovely colors warming your body. For a moment your heart felt heavy- lost memory tugged onto it again. An often occurrence lately, yet you kept brushing off as deja vu. 
Floor 134. Welcome to the Avenger’s compound Miss Y/N
“134!?” the numbers cracked out with your voice. The interface made you turn towards the opposite opening doors revealing a room as big as a hall, if not almost a stadium. The ceiling was high being the lid to this round area. Your heart beat increased pumping blood to your body, dilating your pupils at least twice their original size. It look amazing, almost like you had just entered heaven. The walls were white, the furniture was perfectly placed and cream colored. Stepping outside you jumped at the sound of the elevator doors closing behind you. 
“Wow” escaped your lips, your hand pulling the suitcase closer. So this was the common room or the shared space. The windows were so big they were practically a wall of their own. The bright rays were making themselves at home giving the white paint a new color with each passing minute. The ceilings were probably the equivalent of 3 floors in height. There was this weird feeling of home inside, a bit of isolation maybe mixed in. 
“Miss Y/N?” your head swung to the side when you recognized that shy but bright smile. Throwing the papers on top of your suitcase, you extended your arm at the man.
“Ah.” Good thing your mind automatically responds politely to people without you giving it much thought “Dr. Banner. It is my pleasure to make your acquaintance.” you shook his hand gently a couple of times and let go ,finding the papers and showing them to him “My name is Y/N-Y/L/N.” gentle bow and a smile followed the words skillfully chosen
“Welcome Welcome. Tony is out right now so I might be the only one actively walking around the compound. Well…”he scratched the back of his neck, lightly hunching over with a sheepish smile “I am one of the people you will be working under anyways, so I guess it is good that I came to get you. I would love to show you the lab, but I am sure you would like to set up your things first.” You nodded and he showed you to your room. The corridor had 3 tall doors scattered on the walls, all looking modern and elegant.
“This is the side where usually we have our female members. Natasha and Wanda will be your nextdoor neighbors. Hope it won’t be any trouble.” Bruce looked at you ,when an aggressive shake took over your neck
“No, no. Not at all sir. I am very grateful to have such amazing heroes next to me. As a matter of fact won’t they be troubled with me here?” and here came the normal anxiety that you had for everything
“I am sure they will like you. Don’t worry about it.” Bruce stepped next to the door and waved you over “You don’t have a key or a door handle as a matter of fact. Tony’s idea, don’t ask. If you got up here on your own I assume he made the girls downstairs give you an identification implant. That is basically your entrance for everything here. Kind of an Avengers thing.” You nodded and him wiggling his fingers like a spell. Placing your hand on the door like he told you activated F.R.I.D.A.Y.
Recognized: Y/N. Access and ownership granted.
  The metal frame slid open and you found yourself standing before a big room. It was nicely furnished. The desk was big enough for you to work on it and have everything around. Bookshelves empty and ready to be used on your left and a large bed on your right flush against the wall. The window was once more its own wall right in front of you standing behind the desk. The bathroom door was opening a space before the shelf the same color as the paint in the common room.
“I will let you set up. If you need anything F.R.I.D.A.Y. is always here. The room is interactive, you can ask exactly what works under the interface’s control. The door is one.Take your time.”he was on his way out “Would you like some coffee or tea?”
“I would like some tea, thank you very much.” Bruce flashed you a smile “F.R.I.D.A.Y. the door please.”
Door closed 
  Done as said and requested, clicking behind you. 
Would you like an extensive list of my functions as an assistant?
“Please do.”
62 notes · View notes
hwallout · 4 years
Text
quatervois - ljy
summary: “Listen up pretty boy, we’re both murderers. We carry the souls of hundreds on our weapons. It doesn’t fucking matter who our targets are. We’re the exact same; except, I’m honest and I only do this because it pays good fucking money, and what is it you’re striving for? With your ass always covered? Pitiful peace and justice? That’s pathetic. There’s no such thing in this job.”
words: 21,7k (this was 38 pages on word im,,,i birthed a monster im so sorry)
genre: assassin!juyeon, assassin!reader, angst, drama, fluff, crack if u use a microscope
warnings: (not explicit) violence, murder, language
early an: holy shit it’s here
Tumblr media
The way you got introduced and became a part of such a job wasn’t exactly how one would imagine.
Becoming an assassin hasn’t been a direct wish of yours. As expected, in the beginning, this exact possibility had never crossed your mind. Growing up in an ordinary, middle-class household, it was expected of you to follow the footsteps of many. Never the smartest kid in class, but with a knack for logic and solving thought experiments, you’ve imagined becoming a philosopher of some type. Nothing too spectacular, but interesting enough and different than a usual 9-5 job.
So then, how exactly have you come to holding a knife against a random man’s throat almost daily?
Of course, while young, a person is prone to the effect of the outside world and people surrounding them. Some pupils are lucky enough to live in the best surroundings and are given amazing opportunities; therefore, they grow up into kind, successful people. Then, there are those who thanks to certain circumstances end up walking a different path, all of them hoping for the best possible outcome.
In today’s society, the importance of money was huge. It was expected that every family, containing at least one adult person, was able to deal with constant fluctuation of cash and sudden, unanticipated expenses. Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case in many households and those kids had to experience helpless life without enough money, while their parents fought for every coin.
It was incredibly unfortunate that it affected you as well, even so in the worst possible moment – right before university.  
Thanks to stupid reasons that could’ve easily been prevented, your family fell into dept, causing both of your parents to find second jobs. Not having enough money to continue with a rather expensive education, you felt obliged to find a job.
And of course, being so young and ambitious, but mostly misfortune driven, you thought that the future of the household was in your hands. It was a must to find something that pays good, fast.
Consequently, the first night was spent scrolling down the endless pages of Google. You searched for something that didn’t require any special education (because of obvious reasons), but would generously help your situation. Seconds extended into minutes, those into hours, days even. Finding a good job with no degree was pretty hard, yet what else could’ve you expected?  
The issue had you visiting most irrelevant sites, clicking on shady ads (and installing a thousand viruses, probably), asking strangers in online chatrooms. Lost and unexperienced, you struggled and almost accepted the proposal of being a stripper in a famous strip club downtown.  
Almost.  
The job you were suddenly introduced to was something seen in movies and video games only. For whichever reason, it appeared in a dream one night. The dream had you play the main character, dressed in all black, doing all the terrifying, dirty work with random weapons, but being paid a huge sum afterwards. It was scandalous enough to have you hesitating for a little while upon waking up, disgusted at the thought of doing it.
Still, remembering the money filled suitcase, you’ve overcome the initial revulsion fast. Unexpectedly intrigued by the idea, you thought a little research couldn’t hurt anyone. Finding a reliable site that offered information on paid assassins only took a couple of minutes. The author of the article was an ex-FBI agent, therefore you thought there couldn’t be data more reliable than this. Upon a quick look, you’ve come to the conclusion that the study was most definitely written with intent of educating people on this topic, rather than motivating them to apply for it. Oh well.
From an objective point of view, it was exactly what you were looking for. It didn’t require any special degree from any university and it paid horrendously well, with small variations on the amount due to different employers. Reading further though, you realized that not just anyone can become an assassin, or hitman, as people liked to call it.
It demanded years of training, hard work and terrifying change. The author described it as “...complete mutation of one’s mind and personality, utter desensitization to almost everything. Those people become machines...”. You didn’t doubt their words, on the contrary, you believed them completely. It was only logical that a person has to get used to blood, extreme violence, emotionless murder, which were no ordinary or acceptable sights and actions. Of course, you were in denial, about to laugh at yourself for even reading the article seriously.
But then your eyes landed on the pay again. The numbers were huge. It would definitely help. Your family needed this. Sacrifices had to be made.
The next day, you bought a burner phone with the last bits of your savings. Entering an empty alley, you immediately dialed a phone number you’ve found at 3am. You didn’t know what was the worst that could happen, seeing as you were dialing a shady number from a shady website with shady intentions. Maybe the phone would blow up – in which case thankfully, it was a burner. But that then meant you wasted money with no reason.  
Thankfully, the other side picked up and scheduled a meeting for the next day.
Everything about it was suspicious, from the first to the last moment. From the first meeting with a tall, fat man, wearing an expensive suit and a shiny Rolex on his wrist, to the moment that exact man patted you on the back for good luck on your first mission.
The training was all you’ve expected and more. Tears, sweat and especially blood were shed during that tough period. You were put through complete torture – whether it be emotional or physical. In the beginning, they had you watch videos containing mild abuse of random people, only to progress to horrible violence as time passed by. In times where you wanted to look away, a stern and strong man would yell at you, ordering to stay focused on the task – one that would make you used and nonchalant to seeing such monstrosities.
You were trained to take words, threats and even hits with a straight face, only to return ten times harder. Sometimes you thought that self-defense classes you were offered but never took in the past, would’ve definitely helped with the current situation. Simple pistols were immediately introduced to you, strange looking men always pressuring you into improving the mediocre aim. More complicated guns and snipers were thrown in your direction upon noticeable improvement.
Surprisingly, they began “paying” you from the start. The big boss said it was because he noticed your potential and incredibly fast progress, therefore used the money as constant motivation for further improvement. Unfortunately, the trainees you’ve encountered weren’t so positive about it, saying it was the boss’ way of making sure no one ditches out once they enter (“you’ll have to pay the complete sum back, he basically indebted you”). The money you received wasn’t a lot, but it was definitely a good starting position.
In a relatively short period of time, a huge change happened. You’ve transformed from someone whose eyes watered at harsh words, body flinched at sudden movement and hands shook while holding a knife, to a person who had no trouble taking a hit to the face, only to counterattack by slitting throats.
Your knack for logic and solving thought experiments and predicting outcomes came in handy, for they’ve worked on further developing that as well. They created a thousand puzzles, testing possible situations (“you have to run away, which route do you take?", "two witnesses saw you; how do you deal with them without anyone else noticing?”), always questioning your answers (“but then wouldn’t that make you more exposed?”, “what if suddenly your target chose to change their usual route?”) and having you argument them thoroughly.
You were trained to notice even the smallest of similarities between two situations, perceive possible danger/risks, predict where a target would appear next based on their recent roundabouts and analyze certain types of behavior. Basically, they tried recreating situations that would slowly introduce you to the harder part of your future job – the planning, unnoticed execution and escape from the crime scene.
The boss had personally hired personnel to train your selective attention. Everything a normal person would pass by and dismiss, you’d notice. The unusual movement of leaves in the corner of your eyes, a black bird in a flock of dark grey ones, the inconsiderable change in a person’s demeanor, a reoccurring but overlooked detail in everyday situations.
Friends weren't particularly made in such a setting; therefore, like many others, you've been alone through it all. Evidently, you've noticed other people around, mostly teenagers who were just introduced to the whole thing – yet never really bothered or had enough time to go and meet them. Everybody was just as scared and hesitant as you were when it all started. In the end, who knew who you'd have to fight against in the future. “Save yourself a heartbreak”.
Interestingly enough though, there was a boy who caught your eye. You weren’t sure when he was recruited, for he never seemed lost or inexperienced. The boy would walk confidently around the training site, shoot exceedingly well at the shooting range and progress through his endurance training perfectly.
Silently, you watched and admired the handsome boy with attentive eyes. Everything about him was as captivating as ever, further piquing your interest with every passing day. His form and skill were envious, while his mature behavior and breathtaking looks stole your breath away.
Eventually though, the boy disappeared.
Your parents were a sensitive topic. At first, they were told the job you found didn't have fixed hours, which sounded like the only logical explanation for why you never came home at the same time.
When the training became more serious and the changes in your personality and looks became obvious, you stopped seeing them. The place of stay was a motel a couple of miles away from the training site (or the supposed store you lied working at). Despite their constant messages and phone calls, pleads to come back home and stop “overworking” yourself, you stood your ground. The money you were paid was still linked back to them, and after a while you were informed that the debt was no more.  
Unfortunately, though, you've come to the point where you didn't want to back out from this horrendous job. And a couple months later, the boss forced you to cut contact with your parents.
Maybe it was for the better, because it wasn't possible to predict if they'd even recognize you. Their daughter built muscle, had a scarred body and went through a drastic change of personality. The desensitization did wonders to young minds. It came to the point where you were able to firstly watch and then execute a certain violent act (on a specialized, human-like doll), without having to look away. The two elders definitely wouldn't want such a person in their household.  
Although there really should've been, there was no shame or regret once the trainee period was finished and your feet set out on the first ever mission and first real kill.
Tumblr media
Fast forward a few years after the first mission, and you were considered a high valued assassin.  
There really was no proper reason, but the flow of the river happened to direct you towards the more infamous customers. Drug dealers, wanted criminals, corrupted politicians, all sorts of people involved with illegality hired you. Over time, you've gotten used to it. Already familiarized with customers, type of targets and forms of execution, switching to work for a different type of people simply stopped crossing your mind.
Your prices weren't low at all. Actually, they were one of the highest for the job, yet with a great reason. Despite the victim count passing hundred, there hasn't been a single case that was ever (properly) solved, the employers always getting away with their work. Not even once have you been suspected or connected to any of the assassinations either, and it was all thanks to your tactics.
One could argue that there weren’t many ways a person could be murdered, but you managed to prove such a statement wrong. Not a lot of executions you've done followed the same path – which only showed how creative but also knowledgeable your mind was.
Because of one simple hair strand, whose color faded a long time ago, they called you Red. The nickname stuck with you ever since those torturous, trainee days, and nowadays, it helped avoid using your real name. You doubted anyone even knew what it was.
An interesting period began during your sixth year. Numerous politicians, usually the ones that heavily opposed the new government, would be found dead around the city. Not just them, but gang and mafia leaders who became too powerful and prominent in the public eye as well – many of those who hired you in the past.
Much like always, this government experienced the lack of trust and satisfaction from citizens. Rightfully so though, the public demanded change after supposed rigged elections, finally having enough of the fake democracy. Heavy and frequent protests blew up the nation, huge crowds of people led by a few brave individuals. Unfortunately, though, a few weeks in, the leaders of those would be found dead after announcing the protest scheme.
The terrifying amount of sudden assassinations were never solved or explained. At least to the public. The huge leap in numbers shouldn’t have been thrown under the mat so easily, yet it just happened. People began living in anger and fear. All the officials had to say about it was a simple “we're looking into it, but it’s not our main priority”, words that only intensified the rage felt by the citizens. That topic would always be dismissed with the same exact answer, occasionally adding that those assassinated already had “worrisome and problematic backgrounds”.
“It was only a matter of time when something as tragic as death would happen to them”
The situations greatly benefitted them; they wouldn't make an effort to explain whatever happened even if they weren't involved. All of those people worked against them, one way or another anyway. Still, the murders weren't spontaneous, and just like many others, you caught onto their sly play.
For a little while, you tried getting some insight and information on the cases. Your intentions weren’t to solve them and serve justice, but rather find whoever was the one hired by the government. It was pure curiosity to know who was the infamous colleague.
The information given to the public (obviously) wasn't much, and you were left connecting all the different cases using simple wide shots and shitty descriptions. The best source of information appeared to be freelancing journalists, who published the most details. Unsurprisingly though, those weren't enough for a proper open case either, for someone evidently prohibited them from posting more.
One thing that had you frowning was the fact that everything was way too clean, perfect and similar to your own way of work.
Closing the laptop after reading yet another empty article, you looked around the dark room. Sighing out in frustration and cracking fingers one by one, you wondered if you're supposed to consider those people your actual colleagues or rather enemies.
The clock ticked eleven and fifteen; just forty-five minutes before midnight. The atmosphere in the tiny apartment was calm, no sound other than your quiet breathing heard. Darkness filling your bedroom was only interrupted by the big moon that greeted you through an open window. Yet, much like any other Friday, the outside world seemed to be bustling with life, getting ready for what's yet to come.  
Standing up, you stretched fast and walked towards the entrance door. Picking up a black coat from the hanger, keys and phone from the little table next to it, you headed outside. Tomorrow was yet another mission, this time a man by the name of Lee Baekgon. The reason was usual, another member of a gang who had involved himself with the government, becoming an unfortunate mole.  
Thanks to the extensive week-long watch and study you've done on the man you had gotten used to his ethics and everyday habits. The experience you had and the surprisingly uninteresting and bland life of Lee Baekgon allowed you to do so in such little time – which always brought more money. The faster the execution is, the more expensive it is, and of course, you cared about the amount in your pocket.
Now, having everything planned out and prepared, you went out for a relaxing walk – as per usual on the night before. The streets were filled with people, hurrying in all directions, either coming back from their late shifts or going out with their friends.
Setting a regular pace, you camouflaged into the crowd and breathed in heavily. Colorful lights from nearby stores lit up the street in a thousand shades, creating a unique palette out of the usually dull path. Your eyes skimmed over people, not really staying locked on anyone's head or scalp. All of them were plain shapes to you, only looking similar to those who you've had the job of executing. Either way, it was pleasurable to hear the overall sound of people. The voices, laughs, gasps.
Suddenly and surprisingly, as if trained, your eyes locked onto a tall, lean, dark blue haired man walking in the opposite direction. It could’ve been because of his height or hair, but he stuck out of the dense crowd like a sore thumb. The stranger wasn't looking at you, rather ahead of himself, but you immediately scanned his profile. An unfamiliar feeling spread through your body, sending shivers down your spine.
The man carried himself with a certain kind of confidence, his steps calm and collected. He held his head high, looking forward as if staring at an invisible dot, walking towards an unknown destination. His eyes, although dark and hooded, were sharp and focused. The nose bridge of his created a slight shadow over the side of his handsome face.
Unexpectedly, as if sensing your eyes, the man looked back for a short second. Immediately, a familiar image of a teenage boy who exceeded in all training fields flashed before your eyes. Alas, before you knew it the man was taking a sharp turn and straying away from view.
The organ inside of your chest performed one incredibly hard beat, before going back to normal. Someone bumped your shoulder, apologizing right away and breaking the short-lived daze. For another moment, you stood motionless, looking in the direction of the other, the blue strands now long gone.
Shaking your head quickly and picking the pace up again, you tried processing what has just happened.
Tumblr media
You'd see the man quite often after laying eyes on him for the first time. He even had a nickname. Blue.
Blue's fashion was quite predictable now, for the man seemed not to prefer colorful clothes. During the day, his wardrobe consisted of simple t-shirts, black jeans and occasional black leather jacket. One thing that changed almost daily though, was the bag that he'd carry. Nonetheless, Blue would always walk as nonchalantly and confidently as ever.
Each time you'd encounter him, the man would remind you of that certain boy. Weirdly enough, Blue never once looked back, no matter how many times or how close you'd pass by. No matter what though, you'd notice the same pair of sharp eyes peeking through thick blue bangs – a feature you very well remember.
The second thing that would have anyone's interest piqued, was that you'd see the man at the shooting field as well. On the days when you decided on visiting and practicing your (already impressive) aim, he would already be there. You'd watch from afar, the last couple of shots he'd take before turning around to leave. The male never once stayed any longer. Blue wouldn't even check on his hits - he'd shoot thrice and leave immediately.
A thing that many would fail to notice, would be the fast movement of his arms as he pushed the gun back into his rucksack.
Over time, you've realized that the number of encounters with Blue was too great for a stranger. The possibility of it not being an accident started bugging you. Eventually, it became worrying.
In the dead time of the night, while walking through forgotten alleyways no one really passes through, you'd see him. On rainy nights, while everyone else ran or hid away as to not get soaked, Blue would walk calmly.  
And maybe he had always been there, yet you simply never cared or gave it enough attention up until recently. Or maybe, it was something more serious.
His sight would often be locked onto his feet, hands shoved deep into jean pockets. During the night, Blue would wear all black, a mask and hood frequently covering up his face, yet the dark blue strands never failed to peek out. He'd also wear the same black worn out backpack, the one he never brought out in the daylight.
Although you've met and dealt with many different kinds of people, never once had someone managed to make you feel so curious but anxious at the same time. Neither of those feelings felt good.
Despite your initial pleasant surprise, Blue became someone who you disliked pretty fast. It bugged you how the two worlds happened to overlap at the most unconventional of times. Whether it was when you were spying on someone, following them or coming back to the base with blood on your hands, the man would make his appearance. You suddenly felt as if this stranger had a whole insight of your life and knew all of your secrets. As if he was aware of your job and worked as a spy whose target was you.
Feeling apprehensive was something you never expected to experience, especially while out of work. For the first time ever though, you thought about executing someone who you weren't ordered to take out.  
Thanks to instances such as those stated earlier, you've developed a side mission over time. As if in you were in a game and suddenly had to unlock another small part of the main story to progress. There was an undying need to find out if your suspicions were correct and what exactly was so off-putting, upsetting about this man (who seemingly did no real harm to you). And of course, if there was a way to fix it before jumping to the last, desperate solution.
Tumblr media
Truthfully, you never got any thrill from the pure act of execution. Taking someone's life was as emotional as raw poetry, but those emotions were never felt by the heart, much less the brain. Sometimes you wondered what your thoughts on everything would've been if you hadn't changed so much.
Taking another deep breath, you grit your teeth and backed the scared man against a wall. With a knife held close to his Adam's apple, the man gulped and winced for the last time. Fat beads of sweat raced each other against his neck. There was no remorse for the other – neither him or the rest of his happy family.
You didn't hear the pleads and wishes of the victim, as the cotton gag filling his mouth prevented any noise from escaping. The thin blade sliced through skin and flesh in a delicate manner, effectively damaging his windpipe. The man gasped for air, but only coughed back blood. White cotton soon changed color. Watching the white material turning red didn't make you feel any different, just like the eyes of the man who struggled in pure agony.
Only when it looked like the blood was about to create a puddle on the ground, did you remove the cotton. The other gasped two, three more times, too exhausted and lightheaded to take any action. With much force, you pulled the body towards an open manhole and dumped it inside, listening to the way it heavily fell into the water.
That's what drug debt does to you.
Closing the manhole up, you stuffed the bloody cotton inside your coat and hid the knife inside of your boot. Taking off black gloves and mask, you pushed them beside the cotton and walked in the opposing direction than the one you came from.
The connected alleyways seemed to go on forever, but they were no unfamiliar place to you. To say that you used them often wasn't a lie, but there was rarely anyone else doing the same. Light steps echoed shortly; the fog that unusually filled the tight space became thicker as you delved deeper. Suddenly, there was yet another echo coming from the other direction. The person was seemingly walking towards you. Unconsciously, you prepared to reach down for the knife.
Through the fog you could faintly make out a silhouette of a man approaching. Every step you took allowed a clearer view of the other, and eventually the full sight of his figure. With an exaggerated eye roll and in pure disbelief, you silently cursed your absolute luck. It once again proved to be just who you expected.  
Blue walked with hurried steps, something you haven't seen before. Upon coming close enough to you, he looked up from the ground, pace slowing down and eyes meeting for the first time in a long while. Time seemed to slow down as well for both, one short moment extending to unexpected lengths.  
Both were dressed in similar, dark attire, carrying a fake expression of innocence. Yet, the moment their irises met, a certain feeling spread throughout their bodies, as if they quietly confirmed it wasn't a coincidence that they met here at this time.  
No words were exchanged, the moment finally ending as you passed by each other. There was a strong urge to look back after the other, but an inner voice whispered quietly, saying it was smarter not to do so. Not even when the man's steps promptly stopped echoing and you felt eyes on your back.  
A couple of steps later, you picked up on a sudden, but barely noticeable smell of human blood. For a moment, you were tricked into thinking it was the cotton or knife that were stuffed inside your coat. Still, the closer you got to a certain container leaning against a building wall, you realized it couldn't be it.
Once a foot away from the huge object, you stopped. The smell wasn't at all strong, but still noticeable enough. You didn’t want to interfere with whatever took place, but it didn’t take long to realize someone laid dead in there. In the end, it was the smell you were surrounded with pretty much daily.
Dots were beginning to connect slowly, but you were once again forced into moving. The feeling of being watched was making you feel uneasy, but this time you were tempted enough to turn around.  
There was no one standing where you expected them to. He was gone.
Sighing out loud, you turned around, took a quick left and finally walked out of the alleyway. There were almost no people on the streets, and the weird feeling was finally gone. The walk back to the base was just enough time to analyze all the different possibilities that unexpectedly plagued your mind.
Tumblr media
It shouldn’t have surprised you that it happened so soon.  
A few rather peaceful days have passed since your last encounter with him. Time seemingly fled by, but unlike many other, these days were calm. The missions have come to a stale; therefore, you effectively used your free time to do chores and visit the market. In the end, the fridge wouldn't fill itself up.
The thin paper bag swung side to side as you walked. Cans and bottles made an unrecognizable but even melody as they clashed against each other. Lost in thought, you aimlessly walked forwards, enjoying the cool gust of wind hitting your face.  
But then, in the corner of an eye, you picked up on a man running towards you.
He was in his forties, a body of short, strong and somewhat fat build covered by a formal, grey suit. There was little to no hair in the middle of his head, while two thick patches spread on the sides. He wore a panicked expression, eyebrows furrowed and eyes all but screaming for help. It took him only a few seconds to reach you.
“Miss?” The man panted, immediately bending down to place his hands on his shaking knees. “Miss, I beg for your help”.
Glancing at his face again, you recognized the other as Mr. White - a man who has been barking against the government quite a lot recently. The propaganda he preached was slowly but surely gaining more supporters, and it suddenly clicked for you. This little rat probably had a sudden reason to feel unsafe and afraid of experiencing the same end as many others. What a shame he was brave only on the TV.
For a moment, you were hesitant, unsure if accepting to help was a right thing to do. Especially when such a person was in question. You waited a minute, while the other gathered his thoughts and managed to form coherent words. He must’ve sensed your reluctance, for not another second was wasted before he began explaining.
“I’m sorry, I feel exposed and like I’m being followed and...” Mr. White went on, blabbering something you only hummed along to, while scanning the surroundings. The park he came from wasn’t that crowded, unlike the last time you’ve passed by. There were only a few families playing with their kids and people walking their dogs.  
Nothing out of the ordinary, yet a certain man walking a tall Doberman managed to have you interested.
“...that hooded man...”
Lips moving to form a smirk, you almost patted yourself on the back for suspecting the right person. The stranger was rather tall, wearing black fitting jeans and an oversized cherry red hoodie. Despite it being warm outside, a big hood was pulled over his head, and his face was somewhat covered by a cap he wore underneath. A strong hand gripped the chain leash that held a dauntingly big, black Doberman on a trained distance, walking in a calm pace. The dog was huge, with ears pointed up and forwards, steps elegant but threatening. One could swear that it could rip a man’s head off with one bite.
“Why didn’t you take a taxi?” You asked back, cutting off the current ongoing speech.
“I tried... I tried calling for one but... none... none stopped, please help me... stay with me, wait with me” He practically begged, knees bent and hands pressing together as if praying. Passerby watched the scene unfold with surprised expressions, some even mocking the way the male behaved. Frowning at the current situation, you pulled the man up by his bicep, not in the mood for any unnecessary drama. He looked way too pathetic.  
Nodding as a reply, you started walking towards the pedestrian crossing not so far away. On the other side, at the designated spot, you’d be able to call for a taxi.
The whole time, you ordered Mr. White to walk in front - as if your smaller form would be any coverage for him. Despite not being strong, the wind was still powerful enough to carry the quiet echo of footsteps behind you. The person walked with the same pace, keeping suspicious distance.
Once at the traffic light, you stopped. The panicked politician didn’t dare move, his limbs stiff and frozen like a paused frame. At the given moment, you weren’t sure if the man was even breathing – his chest wasn’t at all moving. Unfortunately, the wait for the light to turn green was quite long. The steps that used to echo behind you came to a halt as the suspicious man finally caught up. It was then that you turned around to look at him – eyes meeting with a pair that held no emotion inside of them.
Blue looked even more handsome up close and in broad daylight. With fierce eyes and dominant aura, he seemed quite intimidating. While his facial features now resembled a grown man, they once again reminded you of that certain young boy. It was a sudden flash of clear memory, something you’ve only experienced while crossing paths the blue haired man.
Blue attentively caught onto your interested gaze, for his eyebrow rose and lips formed a smirk. Slowly, as if you were supposed to notice, he glanced behind at the motionless politician and then back at you, this time with a wider smirk. Such a bold move.
And of course, it shouldn’t have surprised you that it was him. Coincidence no more; your doubts were crumbling down like a house of cards thanks to the sudden stimuli.
The black dog watched you like prey, hungry eyes tracking every move. Thankfully, it was properly held in its place by the stronger man.
As soon as the light turned green, Blue took off, not sparing any more attention to neither of the two. The Doberman trailed in suit, walking graciously beside its owner, following the exact pace. You let him a few steps ahead, before crossing the street with Mr. White who seemed more relaxed now.
Paying the last bit of attention to the young man, your eyes unconsciously trailed down his leg. Immediately, you noticed the outline of a certain object that strained against the material of his fitting jeans. With a quick analysis, you recognized the weird shape – it was a knife.
That was it; exactly all the additional information you needed. The young boy grew up to be someone you now worked against.
Tumblr media
Work, work, work. That’s all your mind was filled with for the past few weeks, and with a good reason. Being an undiscovered assassin often demanded immense amounts of creativity (which really proved to be hard when unmotivated) to avoid similarities between cases. Sometimes, you even had to choose the riskier and more public approach, much like today.
The current mission demanded a month-long preparation and as crazy as it might sound, obtaining explosive was the easiest part of it. You were lucky to have a couple of acquaintances who somehow had the exact stuff you needed, and at a great price as well.
For exactly four weeks, you’ve watched over a certain man, a tall, strong and well-known drug dealer called K. Besides actively selling all sorts of opium and illegal substances, the man led a powerful gang named The Vipers. You’ve never been hired by that gang, but you’ve heard a lot about them through numerous connections and accidental eavesdropping. Sometimes, you thought that assassins were the biggest threat to their employers, thanks to the amount of insider knowledge they pick up on over time.
The Vipers heavily depended on their leaders, brothers K and B. The older sibling, K, as the stronger leader, took most control over their big bites, while B did the other, sporadic and less serious work. Still, they cooperated perfectly, working in sync to create a big, illegal underground market, that the government never spoke about.
Unfortunately, they got themselves into a big fuss with another powerful gang, Weiro, the details never once directly explained to you. There were a couple of things that you could’ve suspected went down, but really, it wasn’t your job and interest. Anyhow, Weiro employed you, with a strict order to kill K in an extravagant way that will have his gang warned properly. Their request had your eyes rolling back; music wishes were never a favorite.
For a whole month, you studied the man, all of his whereabouts and paid attention to the people he interacted with from an unassuming distance. While K probably lived a very stressful and interesting life behind the closed doors of his hideouts and warehouses, his everyday ethics were pretty bland and easy to predict. Of course, you weren’t the one to complain, for it made your job easier.
During that time, you’ve also thought of an extravagant but careful enough way to finish the mission. Thankfully, creativity wasn’t a skill you lacked most of the time.  
The plan was simple when broken down. Every third day, at 4pm, K. drives from his home to The Vipers’ main warehouse. He takes the exact same route to reach that destination in the shortest period of time, driving either his black Porsche or B’s red Dodge. Both cars were one of a kind in the area. There are exactly 6 traffic lights he has to stop at before advancing to the highway and leaving the city. With some advanced work, you managed to interfere with them through a tiny device that was set up and connected to a phone. It still didn’t work at command (which you wish it did), but it bought some time by prolonging the red light.
Thankfully, your city had a wide chain of sewers that spread under every single street, numerous manholes leading in and out.  
The public town cameras positioned at almost every corner were connected to your phone as well, allowing a great view of the street you’ll be operating on – or underneath, for a better narration. Navigating through the sewers should be relatively easy, thanks to the map you’ve studied numerous times. After interrupting the traffic light, K’s car will (presumably) stop right above a manhole, through which you’d be able to set up a 30-second explosive. The car should explode a street away, killing K.
Surprisingly enough, the plan worked out perfectly. With hurried steps you’ve walked into one of the empty alleyways, immediately running towards an already open manhole. There was a bright yellow warning that indicated a hole in the ground – one that no one closed even after a whole year of the sign just standing there. Looking around for the last time, you slipped in, sprinting away the moment your feet touched the ground.
Steps echoed through the empty tunnel, contact with wet surface only creating loud splashing noises. Currently, the screen of your phone was split, half showing the camera display of the street and half exhibiting a blue button and a frozen counter. A few minutes of fast navigation through the sewers, you looked up, realizing the designated place was there. A quick look up granted proof that the plate was there. K was then taking a turn, only a few hundred meters away from you.  
With a quick and forceful tap of the blue circle, you watched the light turn red.
The powerful vehicle driving closer appeared even louder down there. When K stopped and the noisy engine came to a halt, the cameras were there to confirm his perfect position. Hurriedly, you climbed up, working the plate open with a miniature crowbar (that you carried in a backpack, along with the explosive). Then, with calculated and calm movements, the metal cover was carefully moved and the car was right there.
Huge amount of smoke entered through the opening, making you cough. Much like always, time was precious and there were only twenty more seconds. Skillfully, you securely tied the tiny bomb to the underside of K’s vehicle, closing the manhole up and setting the timer off immediately after.
The light turned green and the mighty engine roared for its last time.
Taking a clean jump down, you ran back the same way. Somewhere in the middle, you heard a huge bang, followed by strong vibrations of the ground. Smirking, you nodded in satisfaction because of yet another case well done.
Outside, on the main street, while many panicked about the car currently on fire and a dead man inside, the familiar blue-haired stranger watched with calm in his irises. He was leaned on one of the walls, laughing at the scared pedestrians and their clumsiness. Then, as if programmed, the moment you came out of the alleyway, he turned to face you.
Caught like a deer in headlights, you stopped in tracks. Blue smirked boldly, nodding slightly with a raised eyebrow – as if giving props for the finished job. Once again, an anxious feeling overtook your body, slight goosebumps appearing on soft skin. Gulping, you took a deep breath and walked right past, trying not to look intimidated by his sharp gaze.
Despite the familiarity you felt, Blue never once showed any signs of knowing who you once were or where you came from. Yet, it looked as if he knew exactly who you were and who you worked for currently, which was a worse situation to be in.
Tumblr media
Once again, you aimlessly walked through lit up, bustling streets. Unnecessarily, you felt like a part of the normal community during these times. The chilly wind was somewhat relaxing against warm skin, serving as a distraction from overthinking. There were a thousand things that could go wrong every time, and thinking about them wouldn’t make anything easier. In the end, your skill and instincts never failed you, every move already memorized as muscle reflex.
About twenty minutes in, you caught onto a familiar person a few meters ahead. There was a small group of people separating the two of you, therefore they allowed short glimpses. Still, the tall, lean physique and dark blue hair that gleamed under the street light, gave their identity away. It was him.
The man’s posture was something you were already used to – relaxed, with steps long but calculated. His head was bent down lifting up for a second only, before falling down again. With the way his arms were positioned, you supposed the male held a phone or some sort of device in his hands.  Not daring to approach, you chose to follow his movements from a safe distance.  
A tall, strong man took a quick right turn into one of the side streets, effectively distancing away from the crowd. You wouldn’t have paid any special attention to him, if it weren’t for Blue’s gradual stop as well. Choosing not to blow the cover off, you continued with the same pace for a little while, ignoring the other as you passed right by. After about thirty more steps, you sat on one of the free benches that allowed a clear view of the blue haired man.
He stood on the same place, now leaning against one of the street lamps, phone still in hands. The device lit up Blue’s beautiful features, his stern eyes occasionally looking up and at the direction that man disappeared in. From his actions, you presumed he was the next target, and the assassin was only studying his behavior and roundabouts.
Although you couldn’t see, Blue watched the man enter one of the buildings, then waited for the lights on the 3rd floor to turn on and a window to be opened, much like always. When that happened, he pushed the phone into his jacket and turned around, happy with the final observation. You sneakily watched from afar, admiring the relaxation and carefreeness.
Then unexpectedly, Blue turned his head slowly, eyes meeting with yours. They found you so easily and that’s when you realized there was no cover to begin with. The uneasiness once again itched your skin. It was clear that he was aware of your positioning, hell, he probably even knew when you were behind him. The man’s eyebrow rose in an amused manner, before he looked the other way and walked away.
Something told you to go and follow.  
Taking careful and light steps between people, you tried to stay as low-key as possible, although the other probably expected – scratch that, knew – you were behind. His phone rang, an annoying ringtone interrupting the previous atmosphere. Blue picked up quick, talking quietly but laughing loudly at whatever the person on the other end said. Quickening the pace, you were able to get close enough to hear pieces of their conversation – unfortunately it wasn’t anything interesting, rather a casual talk between two friends. You suspected the man used this as a foolish cover.
Suddenly, he turned a corner, disappearing right behind. The phone call was still ongoing, his strong voice echoing through the alleyway for just a short period of time before getting lost in silence. You waited a couple of seconds before advancing.
It was your shadow that first made it around, but it made no effort of warning you about what’s to come. A silent scream left your lips, as the man you’ve been stalking for the past twenty minutes stood right ahead. His body was so incredibly close, minty breath fanning against your face. The corner of his lips formed a teasing smirk.  
“Hello, Red” He spoke, voice low, but with a pinch of playfulness in it. His big hand lifted up and reached behind your ear, taking a hold of a certain strand of hair. Noticing the expected color was no more, Blue frowned lightly. “Oh? It’s not red anymore?”
His act evidently surprised you, eyes wide open and lips parted slightly. The fact that he called you Red had only increased the bewilderment. A battle of foreign emotions started inside of your mind and chest. A foreign, bubbly feeling was fueled by pure hope that the other somehow remembered you, while the rational mind suspected the man’s real intentions and knowledge. In the end, Blue had never once interacted with you directly, how would he know about a hidden strand? Who did he hear it from?
“Hello, Blue” You replied, looking him right in the eyes and choosing to ignore his previous question. There was a slight tinge of dominance in your words, something that the other wasn’t quite expecting. “Nice to finally meet you”
“Haven’t you a long time ago, though?” He questioned, the smirk now turning into a light-hearted smile. Something about it had you wanting to wipe it off immediately. Nevertheless, his words once again had a double meaning. They echoed in your mind, replaying like a never-ending mantra. Technically, the two of you were no strangers, but what reason should you give him? Was it thanks to the faith that intertwined your paths or was it the history you’ve indirectly shared?
“Let’s just say I like to make things formal like this” The more you observed the man’s features, the more you grew intrigued. He was just so perfectly sculpted, and it made no sense that someone as breathtaking as him busied himself with such dirty work. Yet, God only knew what had forced the young boy to choose such a path.
“Well then, my name is Juyeon” Blue extended his hand for a handshake, once again showcasing just how big his hands were. Not bothering to take the gloves off, you accepted his greeting, somehow managing to feel the roughness of his palm over the black leather. A quick mutter of your own name was seemingly enough for Juyeon, for he hummed along and repeated it with the same tone. You didn’t miss the smooth flow of the vowels off his tongue.
Tranquility enveloped the small alleyway. Wind blew through it in strong waves, messing up your hair. Two frames stood just a step away, never once breaking eye contact, but prolonging the silence that swallowed every other sound. It was becoming awkward, yet neither knew how to bring up topics that obviously interested both.
“So, want to grab coffee, or?” Juyeon asked, breaking the suffocating atmosphere. His words served as a splash of cold water that brought you back into Reliaty, eyes averting their gaze for the first time. You watched a rat run from one trash can to the other, disappearing behind it in a matter of seconds.
“No, I actually have something more important to do” The truth was, you wanted to go with him out of pure curiosity, but a lot was holding you back. Even after imagining this exact moment a thousand times, you weren’t sure you were ready for it. Apart from that, there was yet another more impulsive reason for the refusal. You’ve been taught that everyone was an enemy when looked at from the right angle, especially in this job. Therefore, you were to deny as a precaution to not allow just anyone to use any information against you.
And what’s the most unfortunate was that Juyeon wasn’t just anyone. He was exactly your type. Which meant that he was both the most dangerous and safest of them all. The worst combination.
“But less important than following me for about...” The male looked down at his watch, an expensive device tightly secured around his wrist, “20 minutes?”. Blue's expression was one of curiosity, probably anticipating the reply to his remark.
“I had time to kill” It wasn’t at all believable, but the other let it slide with a slight chuckle. He glanced at you with an amused look, before speaking.
“Kill huh? Working so late?” Juyeon teased, the chuckle from before now growing into an audible laugh. Truthfully, this exact reply had caught you off guard pretty well and the silence that suddenly spread was a solid proof of it. Fortunately, though, the other allowed time to think of an answer properly, all while having the cheekiest smile spread on his lips.
“Why so surprised? Weren’t you doing the same a little while ago?” Juyeon nodded at your question, shoulders shrugging fast as if to nonchalantly approve of it. You were quite surprised with his quick confirmation that didn’t hold a pinch of hesitance. It felt as if he was perfectly fine with verifying all of your suspicious and letting you know about the trivial things. Logically speaking, it was only fair, considering how much he apparently knew about you.
“Well then... I can’t do anything about your time” Tsking to show fake disappointment, the male pushed his hands into tight jean pockets and gazed down. It was surprising that he wasn’t pushing the proposal, rather accepting the denial. For whichever reason, your pride accepted a decent hit. With one foot, he carelessly kicked a rock on the ground with a heel, making something underneath his shoe cling. The sound didn’t go unnoticed.
“I guess I’ll see you around then” Juyeon added, before turning in the other direction and slipping away. Before you could react, the man was already ten steps ahead, carrying himself in the same relaxed fashion as before. His steps echoed, the soles of his shoes way too hard on the ground. Upon a quick accidental look, you noticed a piece of shiny metal on his heels, reflecting off the light that happened to hit them directly. Huffing was your only reaction to it.
The whole way back, your thoughts were a hectic mess, one that couldn’t be calmed down, for they always wandered towards the blue haired assassin.
Tumblr media
You never really liked warehouses, for they were way too open. Thankfully though, the one you were working in today wasn’t empty – crates and boxes filled with unknown substances and materials were scattered all around, as well as machinery that’s used to move them around. Overall, all of those objects allowed much cover and plenty of room to comfortably work around the broad place. Moreover, your steps weren’t going to echo too much in such a setting.
Today’s target was a man named Captain Lee, a case similar to about a hundred others previously assigned – work with government officials. You never cared how many people did what, but you supposed the most died because they hadn't paid their part of the deal or smuggled with the government. Either way, they happened often and you will never run out of work just because of that.  
Hidden and on a great distance, you watched Lee and another man (assumed government official) enter the warehouse. Unfortunately, both had a generous number of bodyguards, but luckily, none were allowed inside. The huge door was the only easy entrance option, but since that would immediately ruin the mission, you decided to infiltrate some other way. Working fast and precise, you climbed up set of drainpipes and entered through an open window on the roof. Done in less than three minutes – record time. Dropping down was a more challenging move, but nothing too bad, for you entered far enough from the two men to remain unnoticed.
Your shoes that were two sizes bigger, proved to be a bigger hassle today than ever before. The metal railing was very hard to move over without making any unnecessary sound. The mask on your face helped you breathe properly, the air being way too stale for anyone’s liking. Thankfully, there were no major light sources that would interfere with your cover. Full black attire matched perfectly with the semi-dark surroundings.  
The voices of the two males weren’t loud, but in an empty space like this, the echo was immense. It helped you navigate around or between the crates and gigantic shelves in the most accurate manner. The pistol in your hand was already equipped with a silencer, your hand reaching up to stabilize it for the last time. Slowly, you sneaked closer, back pressed against a set of boxes.
Then, unpredictably, something moved in the corner of your eye.
Stopping dead in tracks, your full attention moved to the staircase not so far away. It was protected by one of the huge machines – those you supposed organized all of these crates. Your mind promptly wandered off to the worst scenario – it must’ve been a guard you failed to notice. Gripping the pistol with more force, you aimed at the suspicious area, holding the bullet in, but ready to fire if needed.
Despite the darkness, you noticed a puff of blue hair. Lowering the gun with an inaudible sigh, your eyes rolled back, jaw clenching in frustration. The boy peeked out carefully, irises finding yours in an instant. He nodded in your direction, hand moving slightly in a low wave.  
Looks like the day has come when the two sides get to work together.
Juyeon seemed to realize that as well, for he moved closer to the edge of his cover, evidently willing to make a plan of action. For a moment, ego and pride made you think about ditching the offer, why would you ever need help? But on a second thought, he would definitely make everything easier, and who in their right mind would deny that? Shuffling closer, you accepted the silent proposal with a nod.
Although far away, the two succeeded in communicating through short signals, functionally organizing a proper scheme. You’ve got to know the male was equipped with a knife only – which really didn’t make things easier, but it was possible to work around it.
Juyeon got moving quick after ending the discussion, making his way around the warehouse. You watched his steps until he disappeared, readying yourself to fire at Lee and disappear if anything goes wrong. In the end, you weren’t going to risk getting caught because of someone else’s mistake all while already being so close to completing your part of the job.
Once in position, the other assassin threw a coin in another direction, the tiny object immediately serving as a distraction. Exactly then, both of you jumped out of cover, not giving the two men any reaction time before It was too late.
Juyeon grabbed the official from the back and covered his mouth with one hand, the other coming up to slit his throat, while you fired two rounds at Lee’s head. The pistol, although suppressed, made two sets of noises that still sounded through the warehouses.
Experienced, you knew that if the bodyguards had trained ears, they’d pick up on the sound. Therefore, in a hurry and with a wish to get out of there asap, you grabbed Juyeon’s unoccupied hand and took off running. Hurried steps probably made more sound than the shots you were worried about, but thankfully there was still no one that could hear them.
Juyeon diligently followed behind, holding onto the thin blade and occasionally looking back at the entrance door. Fortunately, both of you were able to reach the exit in a matter of few minutes. Just a moment before slipping out, he picked up on a glimpse of two bulky silhouettes entering the warehouse. Pay people to protect you, only to be murdered without witnesses. Bodyguards my ass, Juyeon thought.
Neither spoke until far away from the mission location. Walking through the woods, both tried making as little noise as possible, gripping their weapons tight just in case there was any more danger. In the natural setting, black clothes greatly contrasted the greens, yellows and browns. Nonetheless, the two figures silently walked through with determination.
Only when in complete clear, did the both stuff their weapons inside their attire, taking the hoods and masks off before anyone could notice. More relaxed and less covered up, you’d look like a normal couple taking a walk in the nature. The road you took led towards the center of the city, but it was a long, long walk.  
After scanning your emotionless face for a few minutes, Juyeon was the first to break the silence.
“Don’t you feel the smallest bit of remorse? He had a sick wife and year-old twins waiting for him at home” The question was a pure shocker. Instantly stopping in place, you looked the other in the eye with the most baffled expression. Out of everything he could’ve asked, that’s what he chose to say? Was he judging you? Was he expecting you to actually care?  
You weren't sure where he was coming from.
“Excuse me? Do you? Are you any better than I am?” You bit back, hoping the pure annoyance that dripped from your words reached the other. Juyeon’s face didn’t change at all though, it remained blank, as if your passive attack hadn’t even touched him. As if you were getting worked up for no reason.
“He didn’t have a family; I don’t sign such things; therefore, I don’t feel that way” The male replied, in a matter of fact tone. His attention wasn’t on you, but an invisible dot in the distance, somewhere between all of the trees and bushes. Still, he could clearly feel you looking at him with a suspicious expression.
“Don’t look at me with those eyes. I have a choice and I choose not to do it, simple as that. Not everyone works for the same people and has the same goals as you”
You wondered how can someone make your blood boil in such a short period of time. Much like you, Juyeon trained for years; it was a fact that he had no empathy for any of his victims – such thing was inevitable. Every assassin in training had to go through the desensitization program, and no one was different than the other when it came to feelings of this kind. So, what exactly was he trying to do with his questions?
Why did it matter if you cared or not? Why did it matter if someone had a family or not? What was the difference? Just because he worked for ‘the good guys’, he got to be the morally right one? What even was it they fought for? Peace, order, harmony in the community as a whole? Or satisfaction, more power of the hungry ones on top by murdering individuals? You had to laugh.
All these years of work and you’ve never once stopped to think about someone’s family or friends, for it simply wouldn’t have changed anything about the final decision. “No hard feelings” was one of the few rules of the whole ordeal. Killing people was your job, the execution of someone didn’t have anything to do with their sick wives or young children.  
You stepped forward, pressing a finger into Juyeon’s chest.
“Listen up pretty boy, we’re both murderers. We carry the souls of hundreds on our weapons. It doesn’t fucking matter who our targets are. We’re the exact same; except, I’m honest and I only do this because it pays good fucking money, and what is it you’re striving for? With your ass always covered? Pitiful peace and justice? That’s pathetic. There’s no such thing in this job.”
At this point, you were fuming, jaw clenched and eyes boring holes into the other’s forehead. Although your voice was hushed, it was quite authoritative. The boiling blood that flowed through veins quick only fueled your irritated brain. Truthfully, the boy did feel slightly intimidated, but more so intrigued.
“Get your head out of that utopia mindset. “Oh I’m killing because that helps keep our community peaceful”, no! You’re killing to make the rats on the top happy and get paid a fortune! You’re taking a life whoever you’re working for. It does not matter if they have ten starving children, or a sugar baby waiting for them at home. There’s a reason they should be dead and you’re not the one to question it! Much less using family as an argument! That’s pointless!”
Juyeon didn’t try and oppose your thoughts, only watched your annoyed being work itself up with every sentence spoken. The smirk on his lips slowly grew wider, eventually turning into an honest smile. Although not in ideal conditions, you managed to captivate him so much, and the man wanted to know and hear more from you, even if that meant you had to yell at his reasoning.
It was interesting how the tables have turned though. Juyeon suddenly wanted to continue observing and listening to you, admire this smaller being that held so much power and determination. It was only now that the male realized the appeal of doing so, after so many years of wondering just what had you looking at him from a distance for so long. The two of you were so different now, despite being so similar back then. Yet the one thing that hadn't changed, was the beauty of the young girl that had evidently followed her into adulthood.
He’d hardly admit it, but he was glad that faith had done its job at setting the two of you up again.
Thanks to your state, the next fifteen minutes went by without any more words. Juyeon kept a safe distance, a couple of steps behind you, unsure of what to do. The tension was beginning to make him uncomfortable. At one point, the thin blade placed inside of his hoodie moved, and the boy let out a fast yelp. The knife managed to shift in such a way that fortunately didn’t harm, but warned the other of its position.
Juyeon crouched down and pushed one arm underneath his hoodie, moving the weapon and trying to push it deeper into the hidden fluffy pocket. For whatever reason, worried about the lack of presence behind, you turned around and noticed the man crouching down, an uncomfortable expression on his face. Approaching out of pure curiosity, you lowered to be on eye level – not quite expecting Blue’s next move. Just to break the unbearable tension, he thought.
With a quick grasp of your arm, Juyeon pulled you towards him, falling back into the soft grass. The two figures fell down, one of which was smirking wide with hooded eyes and the other wore an astonished expression.
“You see Red, you’re some type of enemy for the regime as well, working for sketchy people and killing unnoticed... Be more careful, otherwise I can make some money off you too” The boy joked, voice calm but low. His sudden change of demeanor had you pleasantly surprised and without much thought, you joined in on the play. Situated on top of him, you lowered yourself down, just a few inches away from his face.
“Oh, you can, but you won’t” You replied back, a smirk of your own bidding its hello.
“What makes you think I won’t?” Juyeon answered, suddenly pressing something sharp against your stomach. In any other instance, the action would have immediately set off your self-defense mechanism, but right now, the man was allowed to have his harmless fun. Somehow, you felt the other wasn’t a threat, and your senses never lied to you.
“Because it’s against your morals, pretty boy. You wouldn’t dare. You kill only when ordered and I highly doubt I was ever on your list” With that, you managed to take home a doubtless checkmate. The man tried ignoring the way you called him for the second time that day. Slowly but surely, you took a hold of Juyeon’s big hand that held the weapon and moved it away to a much safer distance. The other let you, without any protest or fight back.
“Plus... I don’t think I’m working against you; I don’t touch anyone else but the bad guys, remember?”
At such close proximity, it was possible to predict what were the thoughts of both. Unexpectedly though, beside a moment-driven need to press your lips together, there was a hidden feeling of understanding and content. Both remained in the exact position for a little while, breathing the same air and enjoying this unique situation.
Without any special reason, you lifted up and touched Juyeon's nose with a soft finger. The act changed the atmosphere quick and caused both to giggle, pleasantly surprised to experience it recklessly Mindfully, you then hoisted yourself up and off the boy, helping him get on his feet as well.
An imperceptible crack formed inside of your soul, something that was just a beginning of a storm.
Tumblr media
The next two weeks passed by without any encounters. You took time off to regain energy before moving onto the next scheduled and fixed mission, while Juyeon busied himself with the usual, easy executions. He’d run around the city, hang about in underground passages throughout the day and sneak through alleyways during the night. His victims weren’t big bites at all, for he had gotten used to simple cases of unprotected individuals.  
Juyeon has always been covered by the government, which was to be expected since he did work for them. Every single life the assassin had taken, was never recorded in his dossier, for it remained as clean as ever. The cases he and a few other colleagues worked on were never investigated properly, always thrown under the mat or closed by the court after a few days. It often happened that innocent people were forced to take blame, just so the families of victims felt ‘content’ and ‘justice’ - despite it being far away from that.
The boy had a proper reason for why he chose the path of paid assassination. It's not rare to hear that people who’re born in a violent environment grow up to be violent as well – and unfortunately that was exactly what happened to the blue haired assassin.
Juyeon was only seven when he had lost a dear parent. On an unfortunate night, his father had come home shitface drunk and proceeded to beat up his mother. It was sad to say, but the boy, as well as his younger brother, were used to violence, as it occurred almost daily. Their mother would always usher the two youngsters into their rooms, before she strongly took all of the anger of the older so her kids wouldn’t have to. The man had rarely ever come home sober, and the number of times they listened to the pitiful gasps and cries downstairs was way too great to count.
Still, one night, Juyeon noticed his mother laying on the ground in a pool of red liquid and her mouth parted with eyes fixed on an invisible dot. The father, enraged and unable to process the situation properly, lunged towards him. With extreme amount of luck, Juyeon managed to shield his younger brother for a second, immediately grabbing him by the hand and running out into the open.
Even so young, Juyeon was aware of everything. Raindrops fell in an even, calm rhythm on the pavement while the sky flashed every now and then. He ran almost barefoot, the socks on his feet soaked by the wet pavement. All the time, he held tight onto the younger’s hand, encouraging him to continue running despite everything else. The teddybear his brother carried was dragged along the ground, plastic nose creating a strange noise over asphalt ground.
It took a long time until they were able to find someone on the streets in such weather. One young and reliable looking woman stood under a shop shade, seemingly waiting for the pour to stop. Mindfully though, she ran out of cover to help the same moment they came into view. The woman was shocked and distressed, listening to the heartbreaking story of two young souls who spoke through never-ending tears, their voices breaking with every sob.
Juyeon and his brother were taken into custody quick, and their father was arrested in a matter of one day. Sadly, the siblings were soon separated, both going into different families due to unknown circumstances. They never saw each other again.
Juyeon grew up into a teenager with a never dying urge to get revenge on his father. The picture of his mother lying dead on the ground replayed behind his eyelids every time they closed, it only fueling the hidden fury. He couldn’t fall asleep easily and when it somehow happened, he wouldn’t sleep for long as the image would haunt his young mind even then. Juyeon was unwillingly updated on the state of his father, who he visited not even once.
Either way, Juyeon silently plotted how to get back on the remaining parent, not letting anyone know anything about those plans – which fell apart in the end. The elder died in prison two years later – cause unknown. Juyeon hadn’t bothered to go to the funeral.
The teen ended up without a revenge, nor the justice he thought his mother deserved. Juyeon turned towards bad habits and streets fights, often falling victim to toxic relationships. Everything he did was to ease off the horrible feeling of guilt and anger he simultaneously felt. Secretly, everyone feared him, his sharp words and skills, despite the boy never doing any intentional harm to others without a proper reason. The fights Juyeon got into were only when he felt immoraly wronged, or when someone really pissed him off.  
Eventually, the boy was introduced to the job he’d later become a professional at. Young Juyeon thoroughly thought this tough decision over many times, especially when standing before the big, bossy man who immediately offered him a contract. The older said that people like him tend to be perfect for the job, particularly when driven by a certain emotion – something that would drive them on. At first, Juyeon wasn’t sure where he would end up with a “degree” in assassination, therefore hesitance was a reasonable reaction.  
Sly as a fox though, the boss used unfortunate history against the rookie. Juyeon was told that if he did well enough, there’s a chance he’d be accepted into the government guard – and it fought for justice and peace.  
It was surprising how kids of different backgrounds happen to receive the same treatment and training, only to end up on different places again. One could think that since everyone experienced identical programs, they were meant to work together – when it was the exact opposite. The minor differences in performance and work ethics that could easily be overlooked, were the ones that labeled you a certain position. And unfortunately, it often depended on just what kind of person they turned you into.
Juyeon thought about his time there often. Short pieces of memory flying by and disappearing in an instant. The six years he spent watching different clips of torture and learning how to flawlessly execute a silent murder. All the days his mobility was challenged – running the same course, climbing different heights and crawling through miniature gaps while carrying different weapons.
He thought about all the different people there, all of the kids that he watched get beat up and heard scream – many of those giving up after only days of training.  
But she never did.
The little girl that always observed his practices and paid attention to his every move, as if she was trying to remember them as well. He remembered the younger taking everything thrown at her like a complete champion, determination and will for success written over her face in bold letters. Juyeon always wondered just what it was that made her so persistent.
Shivers ran down his spine as the face of the little girl in his head took on familiar lines. They formed a mature and stoic, yet beautiful as ever face. Juyeon sighed loudly, still not processing the fact that faith made it be so their paths crossed again.
Tumblr media
How exactly the two of you managed to find each other so fast in a club full of people, was unexplainable. It could’ve been a sixth sense that you’ve developed, for the two pairs of eyes immediately locked the moment you walked in. Thanks to previous experiences and an uninteresting game of guessing, you’ve come to the realization that once again, the playing field was same for both.
Slowly creeping up to the man, you threw your hands around his neck, attempting to dance to whatever song the DJ was remixing. It was an easy way to get blended into the crowd and communicate with the other without raising suspicion. Flashing colorful lights along with the excessive amount of fake mist and sweaty people once again reminded of the reason why you didn’t like clubs. But alas, work had to be done.  
Juyeon had caught onto your plan, but the smirk and hooded eyes clearly showed that he was quite amused with your boldness. Carefully, his big hands creeped up to your hips, bringing close to his and swaying them to the beat of the song. With a gasp of surprise, you giggled, turning around in Juyeon’s hold, back pressed flush against his strong chest. The male’s head moved closer, lips lingering just above your ear. Out of pure curiosity, with a swift move, your ass ground against Juyeon’s crotch, eliciting the sweetest gasp in return. Before any remark could be made, you glanced back, speaking in such a volume that no one else heard.
“Who is it tonight?”  
“One of the sisters, Yuri” Juyeon replied, voice low and rough, soft lips finally touching your ear. The grip on your hips tightened, as a precaution to not dare pull the same trick twice. Although the colorful tints of flashing lights turned the whole room into hectic mess, Juyeon was thankful for it hid the flush that unknowingly overtook his features.
“Oh, how exciting!” You replied in a sarcastic tone. “I’m here because of Aria!” The answer received a hum of understanding in return.  
The two sisters, Aria and Yuri, while not the most influential on the streets, had managed to get themselves involved in quite a few problems with the big ones, for a short period of time. To know that the fall of both happened due to one’s mistakes was slightly disappointing. It was one of those rare cases you were disclosed all details, and simply put, it had your eyes rolling back. Everything could’ve been easily sorted out.
Despite being twins, they were complete opposites. Aria was always the calm, calculated and careful sibling, while Yuri ran around, causing problems, concerning herself with illegal jobs and getting away with it thanks to her connections. Those associates often asked for something in return, and more often than not, it was someone with some type of political power. You guessed that’s why Juyeon was here tonight. Can’t say it wasn’t to be expected.
Aria, although the more mature twin, got dragged into everything thanks to Yuri. Surprisingly enough, she managed to find a place in the community fast. At first, Aria often did the dirty and hard work of finding new druggie customers for her bosses. Eventually, she progressed and ranked up significantly (no one really knows how she did it so fast), finally allowed to deal crack and heroine by herself – while of course having to pay a percentage back to the leader. The semi-autonomy was there in theory.  
It all went smooth and well until Yuri found out. To her irrational brain, it only meant free shots of fun every time she needed it. Therefore, like a fool, Yuri started using the drugs her sister had to sell, without giving a coin back. Whatever the reason was, Aria let her.
Debt happened fast, as Aria couldn’t pay back enough money, nor make up a good enough excuse as to where the drugs went. The siblings tried prolonging their (Aria’s) payment date and buying just a tad bit more time to get everything sorted out. Empty promises were spoken through disposable phones as Aria pledged the money will be ready soon.  
And as if they were suddenly blind and deaf to the fact of being in debt, the sisters decided to open a nightclub. Apparently, the earnings (they hoped would happen fast) would be used to pay back thousands of dollars they owed.
Unfortunately, being too hopeful was never a good thing. And that’s why you were there on the exact day of the grand opening.
“Well then, can I ask you to be my partner in crime, Miss?” Juyeon whispered, nudging your temple with his nose. Although in the mood to play with the other for a little while longer, you had to get to work first. Once again turning in his hold, you nodded and began bopping along to the new beat that vibrated off the walls. With foreheads pressed together, you tried ignoring Juyeon’ sharp gaze and focusing on discussing a plan of action.
°•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° 
It was unusually easy to get inside of the security room, turn the cameras off and delete all footage of the current night. With a bit of secretive work, two assassins found a blueprint of the whole floor, familiarizing themselves with all important points of the nightclub – first and foremost the security room. Immediately, both got to work.
Thanks to your moderately revealing outfit and Oscar-worthy acting (no sarcasm intended), you worked as a distraction in the first part of the plan. Accidentally walking into a male bathroom, you managed to gain attention of drunk and drugged men. As expected, they followed out like hungry dogs.  
In the meantime, Juyeon slipped in and out of the bathroom through an open window. The drain pipes, weird infrastructure and façade of the whole building, allowed him to make his way around and towards the security room. The window was barely open, but with a bit of force, it was lifted up higher and Juyeon jumped in without much sound.  
With quick work of skilled fingers, the footage was deleted and all cameras were disabled for the night. Following the same path, the male left, making sure to lower the window into its previous position before returning to the bathroom. Luckily, your charm and flirty words worked well enough to keep other men outside the room until Juyeon came back.
He felt wronged seeing everyone looking you up and down as if you were some type of provocative art piece, hoping to get a feeling with their nasty fingers. Immediately, Juyeon approached the little group and wrapped a protective arm around your shoulder, leading you away. Sounds of disapproval were heard from the rest, but neither paid no mind, already focused on the next piece of the plan.
°•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° 
Keeping up the cover often required creative and interesting measures. You’ve been there, done that many times, yet never once have you made out with someone in public because of it.
At one point of the night, while progressing towards the next point, you’ve noticed a couple of guards paying a little bit more attention than usual. The amount of security surrounding one piece of the corridor was enough information to understand that the sisters (or at least one of them) were in one of those rooms. Trying to play drunk and drugged was so far the best shot at being left alone, but it seemingly didn’t work this time, as one bulky man walked towards you. The sound of his voice was almost silenced by the deafening music playing in the background.
“I’m sorry this is a-”  
Suddenly, Juyeon pushed you against a wall. Big hands cupped your face, holding it so delicately, carefully, as if you were a rose made out of glass. Yet, his lips moved against yours with a hungry and lustful feeling, only breaking apart to catch a breath before continuing where interrupted. One of his hands trailed lower, hitching one of your thighs over his hips, earning a rather surprised and breathless gasp in return. Unfortunately, the guard wasn’t willing to cooperate.
“I’m sorry, you’ll have to leave this area” He yelled, voice unexpectedly high for a man his built. Juyeon chose to ignore the other, kisses now trailing underneath your jaw and over the tender skin of your neck, nipping but not strong enough to leave any marks.
Growing impatient and with an obvious pressure from his colleagues that bore holes into his back, the guard grabbed and  Juyeon’s bicep, effectively breaking the two apart. It took all of Juyeon’s mind strength not to turn around and break the man’s arm – that much was obvious from the sudden fire in his eyes.
“Leave” The bigger said, pointing back towards the direction you’ve came from. With glassy and hooded eyes, you watched the intimidating man, giving him a wide, forced smile. Pointing between the two guys, you started laughing, occasionally looking away and trying to suppress more giggles from spilling out. Juyeon caught onto the tactic and followed it, his shoulders rising and falling in a fast rhythm.
“I’m sorry~ we’ll goooo” Not wanting to create any unnecessary drama, you grasped Juyeon’s hand, leading the way while fake stumbling and force laughing the whole time. The male tried supporting you, and for a more authentic look, his own steps shortened and uneven.
“Drunk kids... I can’t bel..” Was all you’ve heard from the guard, before his voice blended in and disappeared in great noise that was an EDM beat.
°•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° 
Around one in the morning, when the night was reaching its peak, the two targets came out of their room. Despite other distractions, Juyeon and you spectated from a safe distance, dancing against each other for the nth time that night. As per usual, Yuri appeared high and out of her mind, while Aria dragged her towards a small terrace that overlooked the dance floor. There was a guard that followed behind.
“I guess it’s true that they’re giving a speech tonight... how eventful” With a sarcastic tone, Juyeon whispered in your ear. You looked up towards the terrace and hummed along to signal his words have been heard.
“There’s only one guard following, there must be more up there” He continued, head dipping low and lips caressing the exposed skin of your neck. Following the beat of the song, Juyeon moved one of his legs between yours, interested to see the reaction he’d get. His bold touches and moves intensified the unusual tension and sudden heat you already felt. The mission had to be done fast, since you weren’t sure how much more of this new, pleasurable torture you could take. Both were being pretty unprofessional, evidently forgetting about their main focus at times.This wasn’t at all like either of them.
“Taking them out up there is too risky anyway” You began, leaning your head back into the juncture of Juyeon’s shoulder, before speaking again, this time with a more teasing tone “Can’t guarantee that my idea is safe either, though. Are you up for the challenge?”
“Oh woah, don’t get too cocky on me now, baby” Blue replied, smirking when your head shot up to look him in the eyes. It faded fast, an eyebrow raising in a questionable manner, as if his words weren’t special and deserving of such a reaction. “Tell me. I get to hear the offer first before taking it, right?”
“You’re acting way too unprofessional. We’re here with a reason” You whined, suddenly wanting to distance away from the other, but a tight hold on your hips didn’t allow that.
“Me? Unprofessional? Maybe I’d believe that if you weren’t the one grinding down on my thigh” Juyeon bit back with a generous amount of confidence, the one that people carried themselves with when they were aware of being right. The colorful lights hid the immediate flush that overtook your features. A quick look to the right proved the man that his words definitely had an effect.  
“So? Are you going to tell me or let a chance slip away?”
°•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° °•. ✿ .•° 
Aria and Yuri laid dead inside a big closet, their necks snapped and heads hanging in an unnatural way. Juyeon and you once again happened to be the most compatible teammates, getting the job done and leaving the club before anyone suspected a thing.  
The time between leaving and present passed by in a blur and way too fast. Or maybe it didn’t, maybe it was just the power of Juyeon’s soft touches and hungry kisses that made you forget all about it.
Currently pressed against a cold brick wall a few streets away from the nightclub, you enjoyed the attention the man was offering. It all felt unusual and new, but not in a bad way. The wall temperature greatly contrasted the one of the body pressed against you, creating an unusual but pleasant combination. Juyeon’s lips rarely stayed on yours, often wandering down to your jaw and juncture of shoulder. This time though, he didn’t care about the marks, pink bruises now decorating the expanse of your neck. With hands in his dark blue strands, you pulled Juyeon closer, moving in just the right ways to allow more access to the soft and undamaged skin.
It wasn’t clear why both assassins gave in to the sudden want for each other. There were no evident emotions to back up their actions, just a strong need that had to be fulfilled with no one else but the other. Some could suppose it was the consequence of their blunt actions from before, while others may argue that it was something much more meaningful. A relatively new, exciting state of mind and experience that obviously didn’t have to happen, yet it did. A slipup so to say - or at least both hoped that it was.
“How can you be this hot after just murdering someone?” The man asked breathlessly, a quiet chuckle leaving his lips that formed a slight smile. His sharp eyes looked at yours with a new kind of emotion, something you weren’t able to pinpoint just yet. Juyeon’s deep but quick breaths matched yours, both trying to take in as much air as possible in a short period of time.
“What can I say, I’m a natural at keeping people around my finger” You raised a pinky up, playing along, voice low and seductive. Truly, there were missions that required acting flirty and playing dirty, therefore your charm has developed quite a lot. Still, what you tried implicating at was the situation from earlier that night, when all those men gathered around you. There was no reason to expect a reaction from the other. Juyeon’s expression quickly changed into something that resembled a frown, but it disappeared just as fast, not allowing any time to make any remarks about it.
Suddenly, the thigh that was once again positioned between your legs flexed, making you flinch and unwillingly whine. The man smirked, closing in the distance again, but not enough for yet another kiss.
“Should I be scared to become one of those people, then?” He whispered, irises playing between your eyes and lips that were just a breath away. The intimate proximity that went on for way too long happened to have a negative effect on you. Gradually, a pinch of doubt and hesitance began clouding your mind, scolding it for being too carefree next to the other. They reminded of just who the man was, and that the game currently played was a dangerous one. Without much thought, like a reflex, your hand moved quick, retrieving a pocket knife and pointing the tip at Juyeon’s barely covered stomach.
A gasp of sincere shock left the man’s lips, eyes opening wide, as he scanned your face. With an indifferent voice, but a slightly different mind, you spoke.
“I don’t know, should you?”
Tumblr media
It was impressive to see how much effect people had on each other. Despite being busy with constant planning and thinking, there was always space in both heads to think about each other. Occasional pondering about his lips on hers, or her hands in his hair – all intensifying the anticipation for the next time.
Juyeon often found himself rushing missions because he knew the female wasn’t busy at the moment. Whenever passing by the familiar building and a certain room had even the slightest bit of light in it, the boy would invite himself over. It appeared that Juyeon risked much more than the other, and definitely much more than he should’ve.
Just out of pure skepticism that underlined every action, you never directly planned any of the meetings, rather letting the other barge in or set time and date. It was easy to catch onto his habits and when to expect a knock at your entrance door. For added security, weapons were kept in secretive places for quick use if the man ever decided to turn on you. And although fighting a never-ending battle inside of your mind, you grew to anticipate the hidden meetings. His kisses were spreading fire throughout your body, words messing with your mind and touches offering pure euphoria.
There were occasions when the two of you would meet at the rooftop, one always back from a mission while the other waited patiently. Sometimes, Juyeon’s hands still dripped fresh blood, the male not willing to waste any time on cleaning them before rushing towards you. It was a special feeling knowing that the fingers that used to do such horrifying things caressed your skin so delicately.
Slowly but surely, some type of understanding was established between the two. Then, the whole relationship wasn’t purely based on physical connection, and it meant much more than a way to satisfy hormonal human needs. Periodic talks about present worries and bothers, as well as thoughts on current events, allowed them to get to know each other better. Alas, the connection never reached its highest level, as numerous obstacles stopped them from reaching it – biggest being the female's constant hesitation.
Objectively speaking, Juyeon let himself open much more than the other did, always easy on bringing up topics to discuss about and contemplate on. He also shared much more information about himself, many of them being trivial and harmless things, but still something you stoically held back on. Of course, that didn’t mean you were silent during two-way conversations, just pickier about what you wanted to share.
Juyeon understood that, and he appreciated everything you’ve told him. That compassion was the foundation that will slowly build a more trusting and open relationship in the future. You valued his way of acting, enjoying harmless discussions and gradually getting used to having a companion who became a part of your almost daily life.
With a little bit of effort from both sides, everything was going to work, or at least you hoped. You encouraged every passing meeting, every second together, to hit the wall of reluctance with as much force as possible – still, unfortunately, it stood strong.
Blue and Red created purple during their nights together, merging with the beautiful melody of the storm that only grew bigger the closer it got.
Tumblr media
Thanks to the impeccable weather, it was slightly challenging to get to the roof this time. However, with master level acting, fake politeness and a little bit of luck, you were able to avoid suspicion from the residents you passed by. Most definitely, and fortunately, not a single soul knew that there was a sniper rifle packed in a rather sizeable guitar bag you carried. Along with its components such as silencer, optical sight, bipod, additional ammunition...
Once on top of the building, you immediately unpacked the bag’s contents. First of was an expensive, albeit small door jammer that was installed straight away, effectively sealing the entrance you just walked through. Trying it a couple of times just to make sure, you deemed it impossible to open. Next was the sniper.
Having done such a thing countless times before, it didn’t take you long to properly set and load the weapon with a set of new bullets. The fresh smell of metal filled the small space around. Hiding behind a pile of rubbish, you set the bipod behind the cornice, muzzle and barrel pointing towards the road your target was supposed to appear on soon.  
Then, like a lightning, you immediately withdrew back, sniper pulled way behind and body pressing flush against the ground. There was a sudden feeling of being noticed and even watched, to which you were always quick to react. Keeping low for as long as time allowed, you dismounted the bipod as it only made advancing more difficult. Slowly but surely, you moved around, setting everything up on another corner with tall plants and flowers. The aim wasn’t as clear as before, but it wasn’t too big of a problem. Yet, despite the natural cover doing its job relatively well, the dangerous feeling was still present.
Taking a quick risk, you took off the current optical sight and mounted another, angled one, that allowed you to look around without being too exposed. Since you were on the 11th floor, on the tallest building in the area, there was no way someone could’ve noticed you from the roads down below. Glancing over them quickly just to make sure, the theory was deemed correct – no pedestrians had their heads raised up and looking in this exact direction.
Looking at the sky, you searched for drones or any other objects that could be supervising the area (as that unfortunately, did happen before and they had to be destroyed manually, via a gun). Thankfully, there were none, but instead of making you feel relieved, it only intensified the anxiety previously felt. Where was it coming from?
All you needed to get the desired answer, was an accidental glance over the roof of the building right across from yours. There, behind a pile of wooden planks, metal bars and all other unnecessary trash, you noticed a barely noticeable, but suspicious movement. Locking eyes on the exact spot and rolling the plastic on the sight, you zoomed in, getting a clearer image.  
Shockingly enough, there was a barrel peeking right between the two wooden planks, and it was pointed right at you.  
And then it quietly fired.
The bullet would’ve missed anyway, but thankfully, you moved down just in time, watching it penetrate the wall behind. Your heart leaped, pumping blood faster and kicking against your chest, almost as if it tried jumping out. Strange type of fear enveloped your body. It wasn’t fright for own life, rather unpleasant surprise that fueled thoughts of being outplayed. At this stage, you knew very little. Was it only one person? Were there more people? Were you cornered?
For whatever reason, the person on the other building continued firing, twice to be exact – yet both bullets hit the exact same spot as the first one. It didn’t make sense at all, but at least ir allowed keeping track of the opponent.
In a quick act, you moved, peeking just enough to expect to be fired at, but it never happened. Moving once again and receiving nothing in return, you positioned the sniper and looked through the sight for the nth time, trying to confirm if they were still on the same location. And that’s when you noticed.
A blue haired man peeking out, head cocked to the side, his sharp eyes and smirk offering a teasing, harmless expression.
Rage, disappointment and distrust overtook your body fast, blood boiling on a temperature higher than before. All emotions served as a strong reality check, a shot through the heart and mind, reminding of just who you were. They helped strengthen the invisible wall you were so desperately trying to weaken, ruining almost all of the progress made. Still, their consequences that will definitely leave a mark were your own fault and no one else’s.  
A drastic switch happened. While following Juyeon’s movements through the sight, you unconsciously aligned his head with the red dot in the middle. That person was suddenly someone who made you feel threatened, anxious, alarmed, and not the one who was supposed to help achieve change. You expected so much from him, yet all you currently felt was pure let down and anger. The inner battle was as hectic and loud as ever. A finger creeped up to the trigger, trembling as it came in contact with cold metal.  
Before the pull happened, your phone vibrated almost unnoticeably. It apparently did the right, desired trick, as it effectively broke the dangerous, fury-driven daze. With an audible sigh, you remembered who the actual target of the day was, aim moving downwards in a quick motion. Just as predicted and on time, a big black jeep turned the corner, driving into the street underneath you. Getting into a more comfortable position, you trailed the movement of the black vehicle.
First and only to come out of the car was the exact target. His appearance was immediately followed by two quick, (thanks to the silencers, somewhat) muffled gunshots, the bullets hitting just right. With two holes in his big shiny head, the man was sent falling down, momentarily holding onto the open door before faceplanting the cold concrete. Blood seeped out, painting the previously grey ground in a dark red, almost black color.
But the thing was, you only shot once.
Albeit caught off guard with the shocking realization, there was way too little time to get lost, every second more precious than the last one. Hurriedly, you deconstructed the sniper, pushing everything inside the guitar bag in a careless manner. When done, you moved towards the door and took the jammer off in record time before storing it inside the carriage as well.  
A quick glance was thrown in Juyeon’s direction, but unfortunately there was no sight of said man. For whatever reason, you were somewhat glad.
In a slow and relaxed manner, with calculated steps, you took the stairs again, making sure to appear just as natural and neutral as before. Thankfully, almost no one occupied the hallways. On the 5th floor, there were two elderly women happily boasting about their children, beside who you passed with a polite bow. You even smiled at them, but the expression was deemed unseen thanks to the black mask that covered your face.
Luckily, another semi-smooth mission was done with. You were out of the building and away from the scene in a couple of minutes, with no doubts about being seen or suspected. The only bothersome thing was the sudden change of feelings towards the blue haired man. A dangerous and slightly embarrassing switch could’ve had a very tragic outcome.
And of course, it wasn't worth missing out on the fact that for the first time, both had the same target.
Tumblr media
You agreed on further meetings, although they were much different than those in the past. A drastic change in atmosphere was present from the first second, yet neither really wanted to comment on it. Despite being close physically, Juyeon didn’t feel warmth coming from you anymore, or at least not in the same amount as before. The male felt your body shiver under a cold gust of wind, but your skin didn’t feel any colder underneath his fingertips. When he tried offering you a jacket to cover up, you denied with a half-hearted smile.
It was unreasonably late, around three in the morning, which meant the city was at its calmest. There were less people on the streets than fingers on both hands and almost no apartments had their lights on. The moon was the most trustful source of light, its soft hues illuminating everything and making it more beautiful.
Nowadays, fewer words were exchanged as well. Silence was common, both bodies quietly cherishing what was left of a cracked relationship rather than trying to fix (or ruin?) it with meaningless talk. Leaned against the male’s shoulder, you tried forcefully letting go of tension to feel a piece of that carelessness that once existed between you. Truthfully, there was a willpower to continue fighting and experiencing the strange kind of joy, but there were so, so many obstacles. And most of them were created by you.
Neither had the explanation as to why this was still an ongoing thing, why neither gave up despite the little flame burning its last few seconds. No matter how long you searched for the answer, it just didn’t appear. A deep sigh resonated in a small bubble of space.
The biggest and constant bother was that invisible wall, still standing proud. Apparently, it grew taller and stronger every time you remembered the unfortunate event from two weeks ago. As time passed by, you became more skeptical, giving time and attention to thoughts you weren’t fond of. They whispered and laughed at a poor being for daring to experience something it wasn’t supposed to in the first place.
You didn’t even look Juyeon in the eyes anymore, always finding a nearby rock or wall crack a more attractive sight. Why? The fear of looking up and seeing no emotion in the man’s eyes was a fearful thought, mighty enough to forbid you from even trying. And why was it affecting you so much, why were you still holding onto it? You didn’t know.
Hell, your fucked-up mind was daring you to kill the man and he didn’t even know about it.
Juyeon, much like always, put more evident effort into the whole thing. It looked as if the male was aware of the trigger for this sudden stumble (not fall!), and was ready to give it his all to fix everything. Immense guilt was evident on his face, and if you looked up just once, you’d be able to read it off his beautiful features.
Despite your mental distancing and defiance, he never gave up transparently trying. You being there with him every night was all the hope Juyeon needed to continue. Even if you weren’t as willing to see him the next day, Juyeon would knock on your door. Even if you weren’t in the mood to talk, he’d ask a question about one of your favorite topics. The assassin wasn’t religious (and truthfully, how could he be?), but every night he’d pray for this tough period to end already. If for nothing else, then to have your eyes lock with his one last time.
Overall, these last few nights were a weird type of battlefield. Juyeon’s hand moved up to your shoulder, occasionally rubbing down your arm, hoping to feel just a bit of warmth there. You’d allow it, sighing and leaning into his hold, trying to, for the nth time, force a bit of feeling back.  
Either way, the two waited for a beautiful sunrise before disappearing in two different directions.
Tumblr media
You should’ve believed the tension that thickened with each word the other said. You should’ve refused and backed out from this exact job when not even one person in the room appeared familiar. But it didn’t happen.
For the first time in an incredibly long time, the employers weren’t a part of a mafia or drug dealing gang. That much was disclosed, with a rude comment that it wasn’t your job to know anything more about them, anyway. It had your blood boiling and eyes squinting suspiciously, irises locking down every of the five men present.
Their detailing about the job that had to be done was just as, if not more, brief. Not believing that someone expected you to work properly with just three sentences of information, you asked a couple of times to have them repeated. Every time, the leader of the group sighed louder, eyes rolling back in an over-exaggerated manner, before turning around and giving a knowing look to the man beside. Were they joking around with you?
When asked about the basis behind this assassination, in hope of getting at least a little bit of early lead on who you’re dealing with, the man offered nothing useful in return. Instead of giving a proper reason, or at least putting effort into making a believable story up, he threw something senseless right at your face. Upon asking how you’re supposed to work without knowing how the target looks like, they replied with:
“They’ll be the only ones there, guaranteed. It's just a little game of hide and seek... with a twist. Isn’t that exciting?”
You were spared the detail that the target was just as (if not more,) experienced than you at these “murder plays”, and they demanded huge amounts of caution. Three main points were specified, the address, time and the fact that this was an extremely dangerous mission. The legitimacy of that information remained unknown, as they once again failed to give a coherent explanation. Despite the last point serving as a warning, you suddenly weren’t given a chance to back out.  
“Excuse me?” You said, disbelief all but dripping from those two simple words. “You’re sending me against another assassin, did I connect the dots correctly?”
“You’re a smart one”
“I don’t want to work on this case” You denied, getting ready to leave, when the other cleared his throat.
“We want this person taken out at any cost, and we particularly chose you for it. In the end, we did hear quite a lot of positive reviews... therefore you seem to be the right person, no?” The man tried flattering you, but his voice was laced with venom, lips moving slowly to form an unnatural, wicked grin. He wasn’t looking at you with fake friendliness anymore, rather an emotion that could soon turn dangerous.
“That doesn’t matter to me, I have the right to not accept the job. My signature is not yet written on the papers” A small pile of documents resting on the table was pointed at, endless rows of black text only missing a simple name written in ballpoint pen. The other chuckled lightly, gaze turning threatening in a blink time as he lifted a blue pen and spun it around his thick fingers.
“That’s easily dealt with” The weight of his words hit immediately, a shocking situation that you’re dealing with for the first time. There was no training for this and lack of experience was making you a nervous mess.  
Shuffling body mass from one leg to the other, your eyes remained on the ground, hands anxiously intertwining. There was nothing that came to mind that would help the current position, and you wondered what all of this was about. No one has ever forced you into working for them, much less threatened to sign the contract in your name.
The man chuckled once again, saying nothing but thinking a lot. This was it, they had you.
“Don’t you want this?” Another male spoke, his frame moving from the doorway and opening a black suitcase on the table. The carriage itself probably cost a fortune, as it was made of expensive leather, and the mouth-watering amount of money inside was as alluring as ever. It would probably be the best paid work ever. Still, you managed to look up from the bills and into the leader’s eyes with strong confidence.
“Does it even matter? You’re forcing me to do it anyway” The words barely made it past your tongue, their weight way too heavy. The freedom you had while working was something greatly cherished (for a lack of better words), and it was suddenly taken away. It almost felt as if nothing was in your power anymore. Fearful shivers ran down your spine.
“Well then, glad we got that behind ourselves. Sign here”
The whole process of sealing the deal was done in a matter of seconds. Your signature was scribbled in the ugliest way possible, and the pen was thrown to the other side of the room as a form of protest. The weak plastic broke due to the force of impact, the ink painting a patch of white wall blue. Turning around to leave, you stomped with heavy steps, glaring at each and every male in the room for the last time. Then, one step away from the doorway, you heard it.
Your name. Your real name.
The one no one ever used.
“Good luck, you’ll need it”
The door closed behind in a loud thud, not allowing you enough time to properly react. Just once your face hit the fresh air, did the heaviness of the decision fall upon your body. What have you done? Who were those people and why did they refuse to introduce themselves?  
Doubts filled your head – were your employers suddenly against you? Were they suddenly hyperaware of your knowledge, or scared that you’ll turn to the other side, become their enemy? Was this actually a ploy made to get you out of the game? The thought made you gulp audibly; wondering if but knowing that it was too late to turn around and tear the contract paper into thousands of pieces.
There’s also no way ditching the mission came into discussion. With the way they acted, god only knew if each and every step of yours was watched on. Holy shit.
The walk home was a long one, not particularly because time passed by slow, but because you purposely chose the longer path. Eyes filling with tears, your reaction was one of pity. Reaching up to brush the watery substance away from the corner of your eyes, you looked at the shiny finger. This was the first time in a long while that something managed to bribe out the emotion of grief. And for the first time ever, it was for no one else but yourself.
Tumblr media
Tiny rocks sounded under your shoes just quietly enough to not ruin the perfect sneak up. The sky was grey, thin but overlapping clouds blocking sun from coming your way. Luckily, it meant you could move with more freedom, not having to worry about unnecessary shadows and their power to ruin cover.
The first abandoned building you were heading towards was huge, with main walls almost completely ruined. Chunks of concrete, bricks and other unnecessary trash created stable cover that you’d usually be thankful for, yet now dreaded.  
This was the exact address you were given, but the trick was that it happened to be a whole wide field with two abandoned buildings. On top of that, the opponent’s identity was still unknown, therefore you had no knowledge of who to look for and where. For all you knew, they could already be in position and aiming right at your head. “It’s just a little game of hide and seek, with a twist”. Instinctively, you ducked behind the nearest tree, feeling the heart strengthen its beats. Carefully and in calculated pace, the advance towards the entrance was continued.
There was a huge hole in the ceiling of every floor. It reached all the way up to the destroyed rooftop, almost as if something heavy fell from above and demolished the concrete surface. With back pressed flush against a piece of wall that still stood strong, you took a deep breath and reached down for a favorite of weapons, your trusted knife.
Suddenly, there was a strange type of noise coming from an unknown direction, resonating throughout the whole building. In the midst of a less careful and more panicked moment, while trying to retrieve the blade, it sliced through the delicate flesh of your calf. A quietly yelp of pain escaped your lips, hand immediately stretching to press on the wound. The feeling of blood running down your leg was accompanied by burning pain, and you tried ignoring it while climbing up the stairs.
Thanks to the special soft soles of the boots, your steps weren’t heard over the hard ground. They also didn’t put much force on your calf, therefore the advance to the 1st and 2nd floor went by almost without a problem. Occasionally, due to a bad step, the wound would reopen, another flow of blood quick to rush out along with a thousand silent curses.
The doorways on both floors were as demolished as the rest of the building, preventing anyone from walking through and forcing you to move up to the 3rd. Dodging and crouching down at places where you’d be exposed to the outside, you all but crawled up.
The third floor seemed different; way less disintegrated than the rest. Once there, you looked around and through the now available doorway. The corridor was very long, filled with wooden planks that once resembled doors leading to empty rooms. On the other side, about fifty meters away, there was another stairway, much like the one you took just now.
Alas, despite the burn in your calf, there was suddenly that alarming feeling of being watched.
Immediately ducking behind cover, you gripped the knife tight and took a few deep but quick breaths, planning the next move. Someone was definitely in there, and the rapid heartbeat was making sure you were constantly aware of it.
The feeling gradually subdued the more time passed by. You looked around attentively, once again taking notice of the still gaping hole on the ceiling. There was no one watching you through it though, so the trigger must’ve been from either outside or down the hallway. Remembering the noise from earlier, you completely crossed out the possibility of them being outside.
Which of course, wasn’t in your favor at all.
Peeking out just so the top of the head showed, you tried bribing out shots or any kind of attack from the other – something that would indicate where they were located. Receiving nothing in return was slightly confusing, but it also offered a pinch of hope. Maybe they moved, which meant you had a chance to sneak up behind them, or maybe they’re just hiding, which meant it could all go down very fast.
With a hurt leg that was slowly growing numb, there wasn’t a lot of time you had left before retreat was necessary. And never once did that happen. Therefore, trying to protect pride and get this done just to never see those nasty men again, you tried winging it. Pressing the wound one last time, you whispered a prayer before taking off through the open doorway.
There was just enough cover to move around in semi-safety, back turned towards one of the walls. Your eyes perceptively scanned every corner, every pile of rocks which could offer any type of protection. Occasionally, ignoring the pain, you’d jump inside one of the rooms to your right, hoping to catch the other off guard. The knife in your hands was gripped tight, leather handle shining slightly due to a thin layer of sweat coating it.
Tension was as high as ever, air becoming thick to an almost suffocating degree. For the first time, you felt undoubtedly scared. Your mind was clouded with a thousand racing thoughts, all of which only intensified the sensation of panic. The more time passed, the more your eyes aimlessly wandered around empty spaces, growing more tired and unable to notice possibly important details.
The amount of blood you lost was probably in the red zone, moving around becoming more challenging with every step. Still, doing the best possible job was always a requirement, therefore you used last spurts of strength to enter the 2nd to last room in the long hallway.
Once again met with a different terrain, you immediately noticed a demolished doorway, connecting the room to the one right beside. Upon quickly deeming the current room safe, you crouched down, sneaking towards the linking point. As if sensing danger, you patiently waited a couple of moments, trying to breathe as quietly as possible. If not for the protective leather handle, the blade would’ve sliced through your hand due to the impossibly strong grip.
Someone on the other side coughed. A curse followed right after.  
Both moved rapidly, reaching out for the other through the doorway.
You were held at gunpoint, jaw feeling the pressure of a cold muzzle on it, while a strong hand grabbed your hair, pulling it back. Your own hands grabbed the other’s collar, tugging down while holding the thin, sharp blade against their most sensitive point, Adam’s apple.
Neither moved.
Blue watched Red with surprised eyes, irises playing inside the broad space of dark brown. Your gaze tried locking the man down, scanning those beautiful features while still avoiding his sharp eyes. Unexpectedly, a weak wave of emotion hit, bringing back a piece of what you wanted for a very long time. There was a slight urge to reach out and caringly caress his sharp cheeks, cup his jaw and kiss his lips.
But there was a gun pressed against your skin, and a knife against his.
And neither moved.
The war started. Horrid battles began and ripped your heart piece by piece. Everything was on the line and an indecisive mind was as dangerous as ever. The realization that this man, despite everything that happened, was the last person you wanted to harm, hurt the most. It was the quick moment of reminisce about the old times, when everything was just starting. He was the only one who gauged new, thrilling, pleasant emotions and made them feel like they’re exactly what you needed. And it was the truth.
But the weight of the weapon on your jaw reminded of the not-so-bright moments as well. A flashback of the day you were teasingly shot at sent shivers down your spine, feelings of pure anxiety and fear coming back in an instant. Rightfully so, they were strong and rivaled the positive ones, trying to outweigh them and take control over your next actions. The man was still someone who dared pull the trigger on you, dared taking that type of unpredictable risk.  
If he dared pull it again, you dared slit his flawless, soft skin. But embarrassingly enough, you’d never have enough strength to be the first one, no matter how impulse-driven. Harming him definitely was your last wish. The thought of it even being a possibility made your eyes water, tears welling up and falling like never before, straining your soft cheeks.
Juyeon’s heart ached as well. Sadly, it opposed two separate and strong thunders. The first one hit hard, touching the intimate topic of his feelings towards you. It wasn’t a secret that you’ve changed him as well. In a word of gloom, blood and violence, you made everything disappear and instead of war, brought peace to his mind. Most of the time, it was enough for Juyeon to know that you were there, and every worry would fade away. The mutual understanding was then something he grew accustomed to and happy for. The male didn’t feel like he didn’t deserve attention anymore.
But what hit even harder was the fact that Juyeon was aware of your current thought process, and the guilt once again ate him away, bite by bite.
Carefully, the grip on your hair was released, gloved hand reaching up, thumb wiping a falling tear. Rough material nearly scraped your skin, a frown appearing on the other’s face almost immediately. Juyeon bit down on the glove, taking it off before placing his hand back on your warm cheek. The act made your eyes water even more, lips trembling and throat constricting to stop loud whimpers from escaping.
Still, the weapons didn’t move.
“Juyeon” You suddenly whined, finally finding strength to say his name. Lightheadedness was slowly overtaking your whole body, vision blurring fast. The pain in your leg although still present was long forgotten. Every letter carried huge weight, every taken breath felt like the last and you wondered if taking that bullet hurt any less. Unconsciously, your hand began shaking, resulting in the thin blade moving against the man’s delicate skin. It wasn’t enough to hurt, but Juyeon visibly and audibly gulped under the metal.
“They... they set us up to kill each other, Juyeon” The realization hurt like a sudden kick to the gut. It was supposed to happen sooner or later. All suspicions you weren’t willing to think about came out to be true and the terror spread through your body in a strong wave. Everything made sense – why those men weren’t willing to introduce themselves, why refusal wasn't an option and why no proper explanation was given to you. They were aware that if you knew even one of those things, you wouldn’t have dared to show up in the first place.
Or would you? Would they be able to push just the right buttons and play with your mind as they were right now?
You were set to break apart.
Do it. Don’t do it. Do. Don’t. Past and present were clashing together, habits and new found emotions. For the first time in a while, you felt somewhat disgusted with your job. Yet, the wheels were turning, reminding that you’ve been doing this for years and now was no time to give up under the pressure. It was so, so easy to end this all, much like hundred times before. Swallow down the hard feeling and contractions of your heart, cut through like you’re used to. Emotions were just an accident, an error in the system of a machine.
All this time though, Juyeon’s hand remained on your cheek, and only now was it only noticeable that he wasn’t holding you in place. The muzzle of the gun wasn’t as strong on your jaw as it was before. Juyeon wasn’t going to actively fight or harm you either, that much was clear. This had to end somehow, and the male was about to use his last possible chance.
“Look at me” The voice he said it with was soft, but underlined with a certain type of authority. For whatever reason, as if under a spell, your eyelids opened, irises immediately locking on his.
And then it all crashed down.
All the doubts and hesitation were immediately gone. Your hand moved, putting pressure on the weapon for just a quick moment before letting go completely. Heavy blade fell onto the ground with a loud and high-pitched noise, one that echoed throughout the whole building. The invisible wall was no more.
At the same time, Juyeon released the gun, hefty metal hitting concrete with just as loud of a thud. When the pressure disappeared and the current situation processed properly, your body went numb. Legs giving out, you almost collapsed on the ground. Luckily, Juyeon managed to catch you just in time. The male lowered the smaller body onto the ground, holding it carefully.
Your head hung low; eyes wandering all around the room, but not focusing on one spot. This was the first mission you’ve ever failed and the fear of possible consequences was scary.
Juyeon’s hands enveloped your face, just holding it firmly. Neither had an obvious cheerful expression, but there was a lack of certain something that made both seem more at ease. He caressed the soft skin, examining your face that was blank of any emotion. It was the moment of complete calm.
Upon focusing on the man, you noticed a clear red line just underneath his Adam’s apple. Instinctively, you reached out, running a smooth finger over it and listening to Juyeon’s strained hiss. A new wave of tears welled up in your eyes, yet the other was quick to wipe it away.
“Can you listen to me?” He questioned, with a gaze that suddenly turned more serious, albeit none the less caring. The breathing rhythm was slow and deep, almost as if he was trying to calm down in the fastest way possible. With a slight nod, you replied, hoping to keep enough consciousness to listen until the end.
“Let’s escape this hell” You would’ve definitely reacted greatly to the proposition, if it weren’t for the lack of energy in your body. Instead, the reply was a simple, perplexed look, a result of not quite processing what was talked about.
“Escape, disappear, perish, they’ll never know. They’ll never find us because... because they’ll think we’re dead. Isn’t that what they wanted? To wipe us off the list?” The tone Juyeon used was a hopeful one, as if the man already had everything planned and was ready to go right this second. And maybe, just maybe, that was the case.
“We’ll move countries and get new identities – I have a couple of friends that could and will help us with that. We’ll start a new life away from... away from all of this, because we can’t stay” Gradually, his words became more rushed, too many thoughts and too little time to wrap them up. “We can’t go back. They’ll kill us themselves, you know that, right?”
Juyeon was right. In the planned scenario, one of you was supposed to die today, while the other would’ve been finished off upon reporting the case. You’ve thought about it many times, making up scenarios and trying to find a way to get out of them. No one has ever trained you in that field or shown any ways of dealing with it, and there was an exact, fucked-up reason for it.
“Or we could just...” His eyes wandered off to the two weapons lying on the ground, tears welling up fast. There’s no way that was the only other option, yet...
For a moment, you glanced at the objects as well, not out of interest, but pure disgust. Just a mere thought of what could happen made your stomach twirl and heart hurt. Turning around to look at the other, you noticed a teardrop that made it down his jaw. Wiping it off gently, you smiled, speaking in a low and calm whisper.
“No... no. Let’s... let’s go. Let’s disappear together, wherever that takes us, Juyeon” The mind finally accepted the sudden feelings that were no longer confined and hidden. The imaginary, but nonetheless strong, cage and restrictions were no more. You finally felt proper euphoria of freedom.
Speechless, but immensely happy, that’s what Juyeon was in that exact moment. His chest abruptly wasn’t enough space for the organ that beat at an incredible pace, with new-found strength. Tightening his hold, the male pulled you towards his chest, into a first, proper hug. Your hands sneaked around his body, trying to squeeze as hard as possible and relish the beautiful moment. In such an intimate position, it was possible to feel that exact excited heartbeat of the male.
After a long period of comfortable silence, you quietly spoke into his chest, “Please piggyback me... wherever... I don’t think I can walk”  
“Oh my god, you’re hurt?!” Juyeon noted in an alarming tone, eyes immediately scanning your body and finally noticing a streak of red liquid on the concrete underneath your leg. He loudly cursed at himself for not seeing it earlier, hand reaching down to press on the wound. Although not fresh, it still gushed out more blood, earning another hiss from you.
“Yeah, no shit mister... fuck be careful! I wouldn’t go all baby... and soft on you if I... I didn’t feel like fainting. You were lucky today” You bit back jokingly, trying to keep the light atmosphere that was slowly coming down its high. Juyeon’s head shook at that, a quiet ‘you’re not in position to speak like that’ passing through his barely parted lips. A pair of hands worked fast on tying a thin jacket around your calf to stop further bleeding.  
“How?” He asked, confused but curious at the same time.
“I’d rather not talk about it” Your head turned away from the other, irises locking onto one of many holes on the wall. The male chuckled at that, checking the knot before standing up with knees half bent. He helped you stand up and climb up on his back, strong arms instantly gripping the back of your thighs.
“Bet you hurt yourself, clumsy”
“Yeah, bet”  
With a loud, content sigh, your head lowered onto Juyeon’s back, eyes closing as you finally drifted off to sleep. There, on the closed, but broad battlefield, the two warriors accepted their faith. They made up their minds for a different future, something neither were sure how to approach, but were more than ready to experience together. A future that didn’t revolve around blood, murder and secrecy, one that would allow both to heal and live their lives breathing properly.
Quatervois, a heavy change no one expected. A decision made fast, but a result of long, aimless thought and experience. And some may say this was deemed to happen sooner or later, but was it? If things were just slightly different...  
Guess we would never know.
Tumblr media
AN: well... here it is? truthfully speaking, i’m very satisfied with this work, and i love every piece of it, but it has been giving me so much stress oh my god... writing has taken me so much time because i tried so hard to make it perfect and i really hope reading almost 22k of this was worth it, and that you’ve enjoyed it. at some parts, i’ve maybe focused on the main female character too much, but i think that to understand her character, it’s important to have an in-depth point of view. i’d really appreciate it (to the moon and back) if you guys could leave feedback for this one. thank you so so so much for reading, have a good day <3
170 notes · View notes
hitsuackerman · 4 years
Text
Unpredictable (Overhaul x Reader) pt.11
a/n: some well deserved fluff-of-some-sorts and yes surprise upload :)
warnings: this cannot be read solo, fluff(?)
Links: part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8, part 9, part 10, part 12
Masterlist to my other fics: here :)
Overhaul’s waiting list: @jjk-biased​​ @infinite-universe-love​​ @dirtypride​ @blackymomo03​ @azzie @purple-rabanito @meximorrita​
Tumblr media
The night had now settled and you were laying in bed. Scrolling through some news articles about any reported fires or small crimes that might lead to the Fukuo Kai. Your thumb merely brushed your phone past all the reports. This had been going on for almost an hour. Sure that nothing was worth noting, your eyes landed on to the green bomber jacket.
“Does it still smell like him?” Blinking your thoughts into existence, you dragged your body out of bed. Tiptoeing to reach the jacket, you had to hop a bit to grasp on to it. Still not accustomed to its weight, the jacket flopped to your face. The fragrance still there. “Holy shit. Wow.”
Walking back to your bed, you sat down and began to feel the material. It felt like a normal jacket even the purple fur felt no different than what you owned. A thought entered your mind. Turning the lights on, you wore the jacket and skipped to your mirror. Giggling at how large the jacket was, you zipped it up and wore the hood as well.
Grabbing your phone, you took a selfie. One where you hid your face behind your phone, the purple fur framing your head, and your fingers peeking through the sleeves; Making a peace sign. Your pyjama shorts barely showed.
Walking backwards, your kneepits hit the edge of your bed causing you to tumble onto the springy mattress. A playful smile resting on your face. It was hella unprofessional but he was a villain. He wouldn’t mind right? Of course he would.
Checking the time, it was still 11pm. Clicking send, you waited for his response. Not that you were expecting something but, he always managed to surprise you. Just as you were about to put your phone down, your phone vibrated.
Sitting up straight, you tightened your jaw in an attempt to contain a grin.
Birdman: Garbage wearing garbage. Can you get any lower than that?
You: Mean :(
Birdman: What else did you expect?
You: Perhaps a picture in return?
Birdman: No.
Unzipping the jacket, you tucked yourself back into bed. You could feel heat traveling to your cheeks but merely dismissed it as the air conditioning messing up your body temperature. Inhaling his scent, you began to read the exchange of messages you two had. Barely any messages but it was enough to make you feel giddy.
Stretching your limbs, you groaned at forgetting to turn the lights off. Standing up once more, your feet dragged across the carpeted floor till the orange and yellow lights softly illuminated your room. Now that you were back in your bed, you got into a comfortable position and slowly drifted off to sleep.
That is till your phone buzzed. Reaching for it with your eyes closed, you unlocked it and your eyes widened.
What met your eyes was a picture the Birdman sent himself. His molten gold eyes ever so intoxicating, his right brow cocked upwards, and his auburn hair a bit messier than normal. There was something wrong with the picture but you couldn’t tell what it was. His hands were free from the latex gloves and his smooth cheek peeked--
“Wait…” Realizing that it was simply his hand covering the half of his face, your hands began to tremble. Losing the grip you had on your phone, the device landed straight on your nose. Rubbing your nose, you groaned and tried to ease the pain.
“Problem child?” His voice broke the silence of your room. Your head jerked to your phone. Your god damn nose must’ve hit the call button when it fell. Not sure what to do, you considered the action of ending the call. No. You had pride.
“Sorry. My phone fell and pressed call.” You apologized. Heartbeat banging loudly in your eardrums.
“When will you learn?” His voice wasn’t muffled, even over the line. “Get some sleep. I shall see you tomorrow.”
“Hey, Birdman. I have a question.”
“Hm?”
“You don’t have to answer it though. And, this is off the record.” Were you really going to invade his privacy? You two had just exchanged pictures so the line had already been crossed. Either that or you were just sleepy. “Yeah, nevermind. Forget I asked.”
On the other line, Overhaul already knew what you wanted to ask. It was as clear as the disinfectant in front of him. Still, you didn’t force him so why should he bother. If you knew him as ‘Birdman’ then so be it.
“Suit yourself.” Waiting for your response, all he could hear was your breathing. This would have to be the first time someone had the audacity to fall asleep while on the phone with him. Shaking his head, Overhaul decided to end the call. But he still chose to say: “Good night, (Y/N).”
--
The morning now arrived and you woke up smelling faintly of expensive perfume. Taking his jacket off, you neatly folded it and placed it on the empty side of the bed. Checking for any notifications or email, you had received 5 and the day had only just begun. Rubbing your eyes, you stood up and began the day.
In the blink of an eye, you were now seated in your desk. Adjusting your schedule since Burnin had managed to clear a slot for you 4 days from now. Everything was going smoothly till your nose picked up an unfamiliar scent. Roses but with small notes of leather? Pivoting your chair, you swallowed your saliva when you were met with the chief.
Dragging the empty chair next to you, he sat down and placed a cup of coffee on your table. A small note attached to the side not facing you made you squint your eyes.
“A coffee a day, melts your heart away.” He greeted you.
“Yeah. That’s not how the saying goes.” Eyeing the coffee, you forced a smile. “I already had my daily dose but thank you for the thought.”
Patting your back followed by a squeeze to the shoulder, he stood up and left you. As he walked towards his office, you turned the cup and cringed at the note he had written. In his iconic scribbly penmanship, he wrote down: ‘For my sweetcheeks. Think of me when you sip this.’
Turning on your selective sight, you turned the cup once more. Choosing to believe that the note had never existed.
Glancing at the clock, it was now 15 minutes till 10.
The Shie Hassaikai base would take 30 minutes from where you were. Still needing to buy an earpiece, you packed your things and made your way to the nearest electronics store. The stop was quick and smooth, thankfully.
Now inside your car, pulling the sun visor down, you checked your reflection to see if you were presentable. Immediately grabbing a lipstick, you added color to your pale face and began the drive.
--
Walking down the dark hallways, you stared at the raincoat wearing man in front of you. The area wasn’t that cold so it must’ve been hot underneath that material. It was rather tempting to fake a trip and tug his hood down but you wanted to live so you chose not to.
“He’s in here.” He opened the door for you.
Inside the room, you were met with Overhaul. One second of seeing him and your heart quickly began to pick up its speed. The way his eyes followed your every movement made you want to curl into a fetus and fangirl scream but staring games were fun. Eye contact was made till you sat on the sofa across him.
“Shall we get started?”
Taking the box from your bag, you placed it on the table and set the device up. When everything was ready, you were about to hand over the earpiece but stopped midway. Overhaul observed as you rummaged through your bag and took out a pair of latex gloves.
“Mocking me now?” He commented.
“Of course not.” You took the earpiece and handed it to his open palm. “I just thought that you wouldn’t want to touch my palm.”
Wearing the earpiece, you were able to connect the device and confirmed that he could hear the prompt that it was connected. Now it was time for the real deal. Taking the earpiece off, you watched as he overhauled his glove along with the device. Looking at your phone, the connection was now disconnected.
“Give it a few minutes just to be sure.” You instructed. Not wanting to have any dead air, you began a conversation. “You’re not wearing the plague mask today.”
“Lunch was planned for today and all my tasks are indoors. I see no need to wear it as of the moment.” He intertwined his fingers and leaned on to the chair. Resting his head on the back of the sofa, your eyes fell down to his neck. When he faced you once more, you noticed a small scar on his forehead.
“You got injured?” You had failed to see that in the picture he had sent.
“I met up with the League of Villains yesterday.” The slight twitch in his eye made you wish you hadn’t asked. “Things escalated hence the small reminder of that day.”
“Intimidation? From that small thing?” Your voice laced with teasing.
“I lived to tell the tale and destroyed 2 of their pawns.” He eyed your reaction to which he couldn’t tell what they were. Your guard was up but he was somehow thankful it was. Looking at his palm, he restored the device along with his glove. Staring back at you, he wore the earpiece once more as you tried to check if the device worked.
“It works.” You kept your phone and told him to keep the device. “Now, onto the real business. Where’s the food?”
“Mimic.” He called for one of his minions. The door opened and the small creature came with a trolley of a full on meal. A paper bag was there as well that had the logo of where your favorite food comes from. Chrono came in as well to help set the food. Once everything was set, the two of them left.
The food he had brought was enough for a mukbang. An expensive set of washoku was set in front of you. In your mind, you took note that perhaps Overhaul liked traditional Japanese food. Both of you said itadakimasu and he motioned for you to start eating.
Grabbing the bowl of rice, you began to attack the tempura. The juiciness of the shrimp was amazing and you could tell that this was ordered from a very expensive restaurant. Wanting to try some sushi, your chopsticks held on to a piece of temaki. The burst of delicate flavors made you shut your eyes to fully savor the taste.
Overhaul simply stared at how you attacked the food. Finding it rather amusing, he reached for a shrimp nigiri and munched on it.
“If you constantly have this for lunch, fit me into your schedule~” You thought out loud. Eyes still focused on the food.
“Don’t get used to it.” He replied and took a sip of his water.
“Mean.” You tore your gaze from the food and caught your breath. The man sitting across from you was in the middle of putting his glass down. The food you were currently chewing lost all its flavor. It almost felt as if some cheesy song played in the background while the world around you slowly began to move in slow motion. Feeling your jaw about to drop, you immediately caught it and swallowed the bland food.
“Are you enjoying the meal?” He asked. His canary yellow eyes staring at you.
“Yeah. The food is really hot.” You could feel your cheeks gathering heat. It was not helping one bit that the face you were so used to seeing partially covered was now fully exposed and smirking at your statement. For a moment, you forgot how to breathe till you took in a deep breath.
“The meeting with the Fukuo Kai will take place in 5 days.” He informed you. Overhaul kept on sharing information about the case but your ears failed you. All your mind focused on was how this villain was hiding such a pretty face under the mask. He stopped talking and noticed how you were staring intensely at him. Saying your name, he was only met with a nod. “Let’s have dinner the night before to finalize your plans.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Problem child.”
“Absolutely.” The way his lips moved to say those words were enough to make you awestruck.
“Chisaki Kai.” He wanted to test just how zoned out you were.
“Whut?” Realizing that you had zoned out for too long. You shook your head and snapped back to reality. Somehow, the information he had stated a while made it to your brain save for one. “ Chisaki Kai? Is that a new gang of yakuza?”
Face palming at your remark, he ushered you to continue eating. Perhaps taking his mask off was a wrong move. But, the redness of your cheek and how you were a mess was something he liked. Something he’d like to see more often if given the chance. Who was he kidding? Of course he’d have all the chances in the world. He would be the one to make them.
“Hurry and finish eating.” He instructed. “I still have tasks waiting for me.”
“Fine, Chisaki.” For once, you caught him off guard. Giving him a wink, you somehow survived long enough before burying your face in food once more. Just in time for your cheeks to flush even more.
“Well played, Problem child.”
Chrono and Mimic were on stand by outside the room. Simply chatting about what might be happening. The door suddenly opened and they stood in attention, their heads followed as their boss led you down the halls himself. Not sure what to do, the two of them followed suit.
Observing how his boss walked you all the way to your car was a sight he would forever relish. A mere seconds out without his mask, he would’ve complained about the filthiness surrounding him. Yet, he was still staring at THE Overhaul sending a girl to her car. For a moment, his mind went back to the old days.
Once your car was out of view, Chrono was now walking side by side with him. Both of them on their way to the laboratory. The mask now back on hiding his features.
“Kai.” If he would die here and then, it would be worth it. Overhaul stared at his right hand man in the corners of his eye. Giving him permission to speak. Not expecting the reaction, he had to shake his head a bit to remember his next statement. “You showed her your face.”
“You were right, Kurono. She has peaked my interest.”
Meanwhile, as you were driving your way back to the precinct, your finger tapped on the wheel as you waited for Gei to answer.
“Yas bibi? What can I do?” Gei answered after a while.
“You were right…”
“I know I am. But about what exactly?”
“He really is a 5 star Michellin meal served in the finest China the world can offer.” You wailed.
“OH GLORY OF QUEEN TODRICK. SPILL!”
You were about to say that you saw his face but another call was trying to connect. Putting Gei on hold for a while, your ears were met with the chief’s.
“Drop by my office. Now.”
- - - - -
was the fluff okay? i hope it was xD
do you guys have any questions? feel free to comment and ill gladly answer them :) take care and i hope you guys like this chapter <3
99 notes · View notes
jadekitty777 · 4 years
Text
Where the Heart Is
*Looks at the 80% of entries so far being in some vain about that moment*
*Holds out her own overly cutesy entry* I-I can still join the party, right?
More seriously, I’ve been super stoked to get to this day! This entry is one my favorites, with tomorrow’s being my absolute favorite. I hope you all enjoy!!!
Day 5: Hurt/Comfort
Rating: K+
Pairing: Qrow/Clover
Word Count: 4.6k
Ao3 Link: Where the Heart Is
Summary: After facing off against Salem's hordes and managing to secure some of the relics in Vacuo, the team stops in Patch for some much needed rest and recuperation. It was meant to be relaxing. So, why was Clover more troubled than usual?
Qrow isn't sure, but he is determined to figure it out. With, maybe, a little bit of help from his family along the way. [Canon Divergent from V7C12]
A series of shouts snapped Qrow awake in an instant and he was already half out of bed with one hand around Harbinger before his sleepy brain caught up with his body and reminded him that he was home and safe. He settled back on the mattress with a groan, running a hand over bis face. A quick glance told him the space behind him was empty and from all the noise downstairs, he surmised he was probably the last one up.
Not that it bothered him much. He so rarely got to curl up under the ridiculously soft sheets and warmth of a real bed, especially his own, why wouldn’t he take the opportunity to lounge around in it for a few extra minutes? Or hours.
Still there was definitely no going back once something got him up, so he resigned himself to preparing for the morning.
By the time he was making his way downstairs, the game the kids were playing was in full swing. Yang and Nora were both standing on the coffee table, scrolls in hand and trading off insults as they tried to decimate the other’s character in Grimm Fighters 3. Ruby was cheering them on in the background. Removed from them, Penny was settled against the far wall, a charger plugged in the back of her bow, but she seemed intent on watching the proceeding battle from her corner.
As he hit the last step, the TV proudly proclaimed, “Fatality! Player 2 wins!” And Yang gave a yell of fury, dramatically falling to her knees while Nora started doing a jig and proclaiming how she was still queen.
“Isn’t this a little much for nine in the morning?” Qrow asked them once the victory shaming had ended.
Instead of an answer, he got a chirpy, “Morning Uncle Qrow!” from Ruby.
“Wanna join us?” Yang waved her scroll invitingly.
“Maybe after a dose of caffeine.” He left them to their own devices, slipping into the kitchen.
Despite the room’s smaller size, it was just as energetic and even more packed. Jaune was wrist deep in an argument with the juicer, while Ren was rolling out dough on the counter beside him. Tai was whipping eggs in a large bowl. Weiss was the only one going about her vegetable chopping task with a bit more slowness, concentrating hard as she tried to coordinate her hands into doing a task unfamiliar to them.
Acting as silent observers, Blake and Oscar were sipping on their respective drinks of tea and coffee. Or, he realized as Oz gave him a friendly nod, hot chocolate. “Good morning Qrow. I hope you slept well.”
“If he’s the last one up, that’s always a good sign.” Tai jabbed, instantly earning forgiveness when he added, “Tea and coffee’s made if you want any.”
He nodded his thanks, hiding a yawn as he carefully reached over Weiss to get a mug. It felt like a coffee day.
So close, he didn’t miss the whisper of, “Am I doing this right?” her tone having a note of frustration to it.
He glanced down at the potatoes she was trying to cube, none of them matching in size or width. Certainly wouldn’t win any of the many awards the Atlas Elite was accustomed too. “Looks good to me.” Her surprise reminded him of another thing she never had – easily won praise. “Maybe cut the bigger pieces in half so it’ll cook the same.”
She didn’t respond, maybe just not sure how to, but the shift to her knife told him she was taking his advice. Qrow left her to it, going across the kitchen to pour himself a cup. As he added the sugar, he finally asked, “Where’s Clover?”
“Patio, with Zwei.” Tai pointed his whisk in the direction of the open back door.
“Got it. Let us know when breakfast is ready.” He said, heading that way. The commotion starting up again from the living room followed after him.
Despite only a few days having passed since their arrival, it all felt exceedingly normal. It almost didn’t belong after all the senseless tragedy that had plagued them on their journey. Haven. Mantle. Atlas. When they finally secured a small victory in Vacuo, managing to seal two relics away, it seemed time to take a breather. To recuperate and plan their next step. What better place for that then home?
He’d like to say Patch had been mostly untouched by the calamity the rest of the world had been facing – but Signal’s provisional closure and the shrinking shelves in the grocery store told otherwise.
While no one in the general public understood why huntsmen-focused schools were being attacked, no respectable headmaster could justify continuing to place their youngest generation in danger until a more permanent solution to the massacres were devised. Likewise, supplies were becoming scare as less people felt safe to travel and even less eager to trade among kingdoms. With less to go around, it only increased more devastating problems – like crime, sickness and starvation. Which brought Grimm. And with fewer huntsmen and huntresses able to come to arms and the ones that were left being stretched beyond thin and past their limits…
Well, the new scars on Tai’s forearm was a precautionary warning about just how bad it was really getting.
If the new blemishes bothered his brother though, he certainly didn’t show it. Then again, he’d been on a permanent cloud nine since their return so it was hard to tell anything right now, but it sure was nice to see him smile so much. Just like it was nice to see the kids enjoying a bit of peace and quiet enough they felt okay to be rowdy and young again.
For once, Qrow also felt like he should take advantage of it all – to enjoy the little pleasures in life while he had them. He knew their break was temporary, maybe only a week or two more before they finally set out again. But right now, all he wanted to do was drink his coffee while snuggled in Clover’s arms.
As he stepped out onto the patio though, he came to the conclusion things might not go as planned.
Clover was seated on the porch swing, motionless beyond the idle hand petting down Zwei’s furry backside. His face was a troubling puzzle of drawn down eyebrows and a seldom-seen frown set in place. His eyes seemed to be far beyond the little grass field he was looking at and, so lost in thought, he didn’t notice Qrow at all until Zwei lifted his head.
If he’d been suspicious before, he knew without any doubt that something was wrong when the former soldier took one look at him and smiled way more widely than necessary and said with a voice full of false cheer, “Oh! Morning Qrow.”
He only did that when he was purposely trying to hide something from him.
“Hey.” He returned levelly. “Room for one more?”
Clover pat the space beside him. “Of course.”
He settled down in his spot, accepting the dog that flopped over both their laps. He propped his feet up onto the firewood rack, the movement rocking them a bit, and languidly sipped at his coffee as he tried to plan out his method of attack.
This was one of the more unfortunate things they shared in common. Neither of them had had an upbringing that encouraged them to get all ‘touchy-feely’ with their feelings, though their circumstances were widely different. In Qrow’s case his was all self-disciplined to deal with the pain of constant rejection whereas for Clover it was the Atlas academy that conditioned students like him into refusing ‘unwelcome’ emotions like sorrow or hurt.
It was one of the reasons he was never crazy about the military. It was like looking at a bunch of hims, and no one wanted to be like him.
“Been up long?” Qrow decided to test the waters carefully first.
“Lil’ before sunrise, I guess.”
So, first one to wake. It wouldn’t have been so terribly unusual for the early riser, if not for the fact they were still readjusting from their more night-based timeclock in Vacuo. The unforgiving desert heat had meant traveling in the dark kept their energy stores higher and their water supply more under control.
Still feigning casualness, he followed up with, “Well, until my ugly mug greeted you this morning, what’d you do?”
“I’ll have you know that I find your face quite lovely.” Clover chuckled, stretching an arm out across the back of the seat. “Honestly not much. Watched the news. I don’t recommend, it was all reruns.”
So, no distressing headlines they hadn’t already heard. That was good.
“Did some warm up exercises with Penny.”
Nothing too unusual there.
“Took a walk.”
That rose an alarm bell. “Alone?”
But he already knew the answer – Clover didn’t take walks. He sprinted. He jogged. Hell, if time allowed, he’d do a mini marathon. But he never walked. The only person in this household who did was-
“No, no. With Tai and Zwei. It was nice.”
Oh Brothers no. What thoughtless things did his best friend spout that had made Clover look like his whole world had suddenly flipped upside down? Did he tell him the skirt story? Please let it only be the skirt story.
“Okay look, whatever terrible things Tai said about me, they’re only half true.” Qrow defended.
“Uh, okay?” Clover only seemed confused. “Actually, we didn’t talk about you. Well – except for the typical ‘You hurt my brother I hurt you’ spiel but, I think I’m pretty used to that one by now.”
He turned away, hiding his embarrassment. “Oh.”
“Guess it was a missed opportunity.”
“Get that evil smile off your face.”
“You’re not even looking at me!”
Qrow looked. It was even eviler than he’d imagined. “Careful, you might give Salem a run for her money.”
Clover barked a laugh, abrupt enough to startle Zwei. His arm fell from the back of the bench to his shoulders, pulling him in just enough to drop a kiss on his temple. “Whatever you say babe.”  
No amount of self-control could prevent him from melting into that touch. Looks like he was getting that snuggling session in after all.
But, at the back of his mind, the question still nagged at him. If it wasn’t about him, then what had it been?
~
He didn’t get a chance to investigate further until a little after noon, when he got the chance to corner his brother-in-law in the shed.
“Sorry, but we didn’t really talk about much. I’m not sure what could have upset him.” Tai told him as he sorted through his gardening equipment.
Qrow sat across from him on one of the stools, leg bouncing impatiently against the footrest. “Are you sure?”
“Maybe I should be more offended here.” He waved a trowel at him. “What makes you so certain I caused the problem?”
“Because you’re you.”
“Oh, you’re right.” Tai placed a hand over his heart, tone full of theatrics, “I, as the better looking one among us, probably made him swoon and now he’s contemplating eloping with me.”
He threw a screwdriver at him. “Not. Funny.”
He grinned cheekily back, setting aside the tool he’d caught between his fingers. “Why don’t you just ask Clover what’s bothering him?”
“In the decades we’ve known each other, have I ever been able to be that direct about this kind of shit? Now, work with me here!” He shifted backward until his shoulders rested against the edge of the table. “Go over with me what you two talked about. Maybe I can figure it out from there.”
“Really not gonna let this go, are you?” He straightened up, stretching out his lower back. “I really meant it though, most of it was small talk. He asked me a lot of questions about Signal and what it was like to be a teacher. We thought up some ideas how to strengthen the Grimm defenses around Patch before we all leave.”
He tried to hold back his disappointment. “That’s it?”
“Yeah? I don’t know what else you’re looking for.” Qrow must have been doing a poor job, because Tai’s expression shifted to something more sympathetic. He wrung a hand through his dulling blond hair, trying to find an answer he didn’t have. “Uh, we talked about Misty Ridge for a bit?”
Qrow snorted. That certainly had been nothing more than idle chitchat. Misty Ridge was just a small mountain range that ran through the island, given its name from the near permanent mist that clung to the cliffs. He wouldn’t argue that they were beautiful to look at; he never failed to admire them from above whenever he went for a fly. Especially this time of year, when they were-
They were dusted in snow.
His eyes went wide as his brain finally made the connection.
“Figure it out?” Tai asked.
“Yeah.” He sighed. “He’s homesick.”
“Oh.”
Qrow fidgeted with a stray nail, spinning it around between his fingers. “All of us have been running from town to town for weeks now. We’ve barely had time to catch our breath, let alone our thoughts. I should have figured when we finally slowed down, something like this would happen.”
It was something he certainly had to contend with on the norm – but at least he had the peace of mind knowing his home would welcome him back. Not so much for the guy who was court martialed out of his position.
What must Clover be missing? The novelty shops he used visit? The sandwich place he brought Qrow to on their first date? The two-room apartment, with his clover-potted plants and paintings of the seas? Or maybe it was the things ingrained in his heart – like the routine of motions he was used to when he got ready for a day full of Huntsman missions and the people he used to spend it with.
His friend hummed, crossing his arms. “So, what are you gonna do about it?”
He shrugged, looking up at his friend. “What can I do? It’s not like I can stuff Atlas and Mantle in a travel bag and bring them here.”
“Very astute.” Tai remarked. “Now that you’ve ruled out the impossible, how about something smaller? Maybe make his favorite Atlesian dish? Or there might still be some wares from Mantle at the trader stalls in the market.”
“I’m not much of a cook. And he can’t exactly take a bunch of junk with us.” Qrow reminded.
He rolled his eyes. “Brothers, I hope Clover doesn’t think he’s dating a romantic.” He waved his hands outwards. “It’s not about him lugging it around, it’s just about creating a familiar space for him. Something he can look at and feel a little less out of sorts.”
Qrow tossed the idea around his head. Would Clover be touched by such a gesture? Or would it just put a bad taste in his mouth? Never mind that he didn’t even have half a clue what to get him if he could find anything.
Maybe he could just bring him up to the mountains? Or- wait! That was it!
“I got it! Come on.” He said, jumping up from his stool.
“Uh?!” Tai flailed as he was shoved towards the door. “You gonna tell me what it is first?”
“In a minute, we need the kids.”
~
The most accurate thing to say about the way Qrow’s life operated was that even his best laid plans never went perfect. That’s why he clung to the background as a spectator while everyone else did the task he’d set them out on, mostly limiting himself to occasionally running messages between the groups.
It was probably for the better anyways – he certainly didn’t have Weiss and Yang’s knack for detail or direction for something like this. Or their general enthusiasm.
“No, no!” The ice princess pointed at the tallest Maple in the center of the yard. “A few more on this tree Penny!”
“Ruby, bring the hose over here!” Yang called from the east side of the backyard, a shovel propped on her shoulder.
The request fell on deaf ears as, with a wicked cackle, Ruby aimed the nozzle at Oscar and blasted him in the back. His resounding screech could have caused an avalanche.
“Young lady!” Tai bellowed over the poor farmhand’s shouts, “If you can’t handle that hose responsibly, I’m taking it away from you.”
Her silver eyes glinted, pointed it his way now. “Just try it dad! I’ll get you next!”
As the war for the gardening tool got into full swing, Blake looked up at him from where she was tacking down the last of the fabric to the porch railing, her smile fond. “I believe that’s the sign for we’re ready.”
“Seems more like a sign to get started before they ruin the surprise.” Qrow replied, watching Oscar wrest the hose free while Tai threw his youngest up over his shoulder, ignoring Ruby’s shrieks and cries for her other teammates to avenge her. He stood from the bench, calling over the field, “I’m gonna go get Clover. So, chill everyone!” He shot a look at his eldest niece and brother-in-law when they both started cackling. “Clam it you two!”
“Go get him Uncle Qrow! We’ve got this!” Ruby encouraged.
Too bad he wasn’t sure if he was ready. The nagging worry that Clover may not like this at all continued to tangle around him like a buckthorn bush. It only sunk its thorns in deeper as he made his way inside and back into the living room area.
It seemed he’d come just in time, because Clover was just finishing up wiping the floor with Team JNR over their friendly round of Remnant: The Game.
“Ugh.” Jaune’s forehead thunked on the table top. “How do you always get the best trap cards?”
“Guess I’m just lucky.” Clover earned every bit of the scathing glare the younger team leader sent his way. “Wanna go again?”
“Might want to pause on that.” He intervened before anyone could speak up, striding forward. “Ruby’s looking for you three. She’s out back.”
Taking their obvious cue, the kids got to their feet, heading out with one last ‘We’ll get you next time!’ from Nora. Clover only chuckled at the baseless threat, beginning to pick up the game pieces.
Qrow collected some stray cards strewn along the floor, eyeing the placement of the board. “Controlling Atlas, huh?”
He shrugged, setting some of the tiny plastic soldiers back into the box. “What can I say? I know it best.”
“’Suppose you do.” He rubber-banded the rest of the stack together, choosing his next words carefully. “You’ve been thinking about Atlas a lot, haven’t you?”
“No more than usual.” He replied, tossing the dice in their little tray.
“Really?”
He wasn’t sure if it was his tone or just his insistence, but Clover suddenly paused, meeting his gaze, pushing that same unerring optimism to the forefront of his smile, “Hey now, what’s with the 4-1-1?”
If there had been a stenographer detailing every moment of Qrow’s life from the beginning to now, the record would show he was not in any way good at these things. So, when he finally explained himself, it sounded harsh even to his own ears. “Cut the act already. You looked miserable this morning.”
“Well, miserable’s not the word I would have used.” He turned away from him, focusing on folding up the game board instead. “Nostalgic, maybe.”
Yep, screwed that one up. He exhaled softly, wishing he could just borrow the other’s softhearted patience for the next five minutes. He rounded the table, taking residence in the spot beside him, tapping their knees together. “Sorry. I just know you have some heavy stuff on your mind and I don’t know how to ask about it without sounding like an insensitive jerk.”
Clover took his time to put the box top on before he responded. “No, it’s not you. Not really. I have been feeling pretty lost lately, but I was hoping you wouldn’t notice. Heh, guess I should have known better then to get something past Oz’s best spy.”
“Damn straight.” His chest swelled with pride. “I don’t get it though, why wouldn’t you want me to know?”
As rare as his frown, the other was suddenly hesitant as he ran a hand over the back of his head. “Because I didn’t want you to think I was regretting coming along with you.”
“I wouldn’t think that.”
He rose an eyebrow, and in a tone nearly identical to the one Qrow used on him, said, “Really?”
“I’ll – try not to think that.” He amended. “But I don’t want my stupid inhibitions to stop you from talking to me about stuff like this.”
“They’re not st-”
“Sshh, stop being my personal therapist for a sec and just listen.” Qrow placed his hand over one of Clover’s, taking a deep breath to calm his own nerves. Nothing to lose, right? “When we started to get to know each other, you saw right through all my bullshit almost immediately. It was – kind of annoying, actually. I’d been building up those walls my whole life and you just leapt right over them. Or, maybe you busted through ‘em with that hard head of yours.” He chuckled softly. “I didn’t know how to handle someone like you. What I really wasn’t expecting was that I’d grow to like it.”
The hand he was holding rotated, until their palms where touching instead, strong fingers squeezing his.
A smile tugged at his lips, the simple touch encouraging him to go on. It was funny. Eight months ago, he never imagined himself speaking like this, open and raw. “There are things I’ve been able to tell you that I’ve never even admitted to my own family before. It’s been so unbelievably freeing.” He rose his eyes, staring into deep teal. “But I don’t want this to be one-sided. What’s happening between us, it’s important to me. I know I’m not as good with this stuff as you, probably never will be, but I still want you to feel the same safety and ease I do.”
“Qrow…” Clover murmured, but words seemed to fail him. Instead he shifted towards him, enough so he could cup his jaw with his free hand and lean his body forward.
Qrow’s eyes slip closed as their lips touch, the lingering caress gentle yet searing. He could have stayed in that moment forever.
So, of course, his scroll buzzed and broke them apart.
He pulled it out, seeing a message from Tai.
What are you two doing? Making out?
Cheeky bastard.
He tapped back a response, reassuring him they were on their way. “I uh, heh, I got so caught up I kind of forgot I have a surprise for you.”
Clover’s face lit up immediately. It was rather cute. “What kind of surprise?”
“You’ll see.” He got to his feet, tugging him by their clasped hands.
It didn’t take more than that to convince his partner to his feet. He led him to the darkened kitchen, the shades drawn to keep the gift hidden just a little longer. As they came to stand in front of the door, he placed his hand on the knob, but didn’t turn it quite yet.
“I know there’s probably a lot you miss about Atlas and Mantle. Things I can’t really bring back.”  Qrow started, trying to cool his nerves. “But I wanted to try to give something to you, even if it’s just for today.”
He kept his eyes on him, even as he opened the door – meaning he didn’t miss a second of how Clover’s expression shifted from curiosity, to shock, to, finally, absolute wonderment as he took in the transformed backyard.
“SURPRISE!” Everyone shouted from their places around the winter wonderland they stood in.
With Penny, it hadn’t been quite as difficult to pull off as Qrow had feared it might. A few sheets of ice, and suddenly they had enough chill to make snow stick. Between boulder-sized ice chunks that the various blade-oriented fighters could shear into shavings and Tai’s old pressure nozzle that turned buckets of ice water into flakes, they soon had the majority of the yard covered – enough that they could shovel the snow into great big mounds. The overhang of the roof and all the nearby trees had real icicles hanging down. For the places they didn’t have time to reasonably cover, swathes of shimmery, white fabric were used instead, ribbons of it spiraled over the porch railing or along the still leafy tree-tops.
As they stepped out into the temporary, magical world, for the second time that day, Clover seemed a loss for words. “I… This is… How?”
“Do you like it? We worked all afternoon on it!” Ruby asked, perched onto one of the many snow mounds Yang had shoveled together.
Penny lifted a finger, adding methodically, “We followed all the exact specifications of a snow day for optimal fun.”
“It’s, incredible.” Clover said, grinning ear-to-ear. “You all didn’t have to do this for me.”
Weiss waved him off first. “Don’t be silly. Of course we did.”
“You’ve become a vital member of our team. If we can show our appreciation of that with such a gesture, then it’s our honor.” Ren surmised wisely.
“Yeah! Now get down here so we can kick your butt at a good ol’ fashioned snowball fight!” Yang pumped a fist in the air, the sentiment quickly echoed by Nora and Jaune.
Qrow smiled at the sound of his partner’s laughter, the mirth wiping away any doubts he’d had that this wasn’t the right call.
Blake glanced around. “Shouldn’t we make teams then?”
“Right! Teams of three!” Jaune called.
“Uh, maybe I’ll just sit this one out-” Oscar tried to back away.
“Nice try lil’ Ozcar!” Nora swept him into a chokehold. “Me, you and Ren are gonna take home the gold!”
“Qrow’s with me and Ruby!” Tai claimed.
“Yes!! You’re all going down!” Ruby cheered.
Yang threw her arms over Blake and Jaune’s shoulders, boasting right back, “Hah! Not when we’ve got Mr. Strategy!”
As everyone continued their false taunts, Qrow squeezed the hand he held one last time, before letting go and hopping over the railing to join his family.
“Hey wait! What about me?” Clover protested. “Don’t you want to be on a team with me?”
He turned around, smirking. “And miss the opportunity to bean you right in that perfect face of yours? No way.”
He looked mockingly hurt, which was quickly wiped away as Weiss announced “That’s fine.” She made her way over to Penny, the android practically beaming over being chosen. “He can be on ours. This is our element after all.”
Clover looked from them, back to Qrow, a smirk of his own growing as he made his way off the porch. “Well babe, you had your chance. Don’t regret it when we utterly thrash you.”
“We’ll see lucky charm. We’ll see.”
The battle lasted until the sun was going down, when the icicles had long ago dripped and fallen from their perches and the snow and ice underfoot was little more than slush and mud. They trekked inside, sitting around the roaring hearth and trading stories over a meal of soup and bread. As the night waned, one by one they started to turn in until only Qrow and Clover were left, lounging on the couch together while the embers faded in the fireplace. Head pillowed against the other’s clavicle, Qrow was content enough he started to drift.
On the edges of sleep a faint ‘I love you’ breathed over his hair.
As he slipped into his dreams, he smiled, because he realized that even if he could never truly give Clover back his old home, things would be alright.
They could create a new one together.
64 notes · View notes
wethepixies · 4 years
Photo
Tumblr media
Welcome to part two of our interview series, pixies! Today, we’re presenting our interview with four of the flaptastic people who make this rewrite possible. They had a lot to say, so this post is rather long - keep reading to see the full interviews!
Our first two Game Creator interviews feature two of our beloved artists - Rachel and Ci.
How did you first find out about the WTP project, and what inspired you to start working as an artist?
Rachel: In a computer graphics class I took last semester, one of our projects reminded me and my friend of Pixie Hollow, so we were reminiscing about the game and I really wanted to see if there was a rewritten version of it. When I found WTP and saw they were accepting artist applications, I was super excited because I loved the game and was starting to get into animation at the time as well. I also just adore the process of game development in general, so I was thrilled to become a part of WTP.
Ci was introduced to the project by a friend who’s also a staff member!
What is your favorite part of your job as a WTP artist?
Rachel: My favorite part is being able to contribute my work to a bigger project. Seeing the art I worked on in the game is really exciting to me. Just knowing that the work you put in is helping to further the game is really cool. As for my favorite thing to work on, it’s really strange, but I enjoy creating the UI buttons and signs for different meadows or shops.They’re super small and no one really pays attention to them, but they’re also extremely necessary so I guess I just like to make them, haha. They don’t always take too long to make but I think they’re cute. Also, I’m especially excited for all the new meadows, as I really enjoy helping to restore the beautiful art for the meadows.
Check out this gorgeous sign that Rachel restored for one of our meadow teleporters!
Tumblr media
Ci: My favorite piece of art that I’ve created for WTP was probably a background I restored for a general winter theme/season back when I first joined. It’s not being used right now, but it’s pretty and you’ll just have to take my word for it :’)
How long does it take for you to work on art for WTP, and how do you fit that in your schedule?
Rachel: The time it takes really depends on how much of the project we have completed already. Oftentimes we’ll be working collaboratively and finish what other people have started. So if we are working on something from scratch it can take quite a while, but sometimes it’s just a matter of adding finishing touches and compiling pieces together to create a finished product. And each task takes a different amount of time. For instance, resizing something small will take a few minutes, but creating an atlas for fairy clothing can take hours, especially when you need to restore an item from scratch. Either way, I think it’s still beneficial for us to take our time to create the best product we can. Personally, I don’t always get to work everyday, but when I do, I’ll spend hours because I like to finish tasks in one sitting if I can, although I can’t always haha.  I think that working in moderation is always a good idea as long as you’re getting your work done, and knowing we have so many fans really pushes me to get tasks done and do them well. As for fitting it into my schedule, because of quarantine, I definitely have a lot more time to work on WTP, but during the school semester I would have to plan out what I needed to get done and when I needed to do it in order make sure I could get all of my school projects and WTP work done on certain days in order to avoid as much stress as possible. 
Ci: I don’t have time to work on artwork daily, but I do try to stay on top of what other people are working on, so a small chunk of my day is dedicated to discord. Sometimes I’ll be busy for weeks and do a whole bunch of tasks afterwards in one go, and sometimes I try to take on smaller things (pre-corona I’d sometimes spend time between lectures because that’s often the only time I have!). Some tasks are 5 minute jobs, like UI, but others, like adding clothing, take a few hours. Backgrounds probably take me the longest. A couple hours for a few days, if I have time to work on them daily. They’re really fun when starting!! but after day 3 it’s quite the grind. I like to sleep on those, since there’s so much detail in the PH backgrounds that I’ll inevitably miss something.
Rachel, you mentioned atlases and spritesheets - can you explain what they are and how you use them?
Rachel: An atlas and spritesheet contains all of the different variations of a clothing item or anything you can change on the fairy. So for instance, the hair atlas has all of the different types of hair you can choose when creating your fairy packed into one single file. So in order to make one you have to create all the hair pieces, position them correctly on a fairy reference, export each hair image, and then combine them all onto the atlas file. Then a json file is also created to describe where each image is in the file in order to use it in the game. The spritesheet is similar and is basically a horizontal version of the atlas with all of the images that we use in CAF to scroll through whatever you’re changing.
Do you start the graphics by hand or via some digital web design program?
Rachel: I almost always use digital programs. Sometimes I’ll plan something out quickly on paper but most of the time I’ll use Photoshop. We also use DragonBones for animation.
Ci: All of the research we do is online, so it saves a couple of steps and retains image quality to just keep everything digital. I also don’t have a scanner :’)
And finally, what’s the most challenging piece of art that you’ve made for WTP?
Rachel: The most challenging piece that I’ve done for WTP was probably the hair atlas for when a player creates a fairy because it was the first project I was taking on. All the hair was made already, I just had to resize, reposition, and fix any pieces that were lower quality, and although it was daunting at first, once I started, I was able to get the hang of it (even if it took a few tries), and now I’m super happy I learned how to do it.
Ci: We were missing a whole area of the CAF background (the part that shows up when you’re picking a name) that got passed around for one or two months, and eventually I got to work on it. It was the closest to a custom piece of art that I’ve made for WTP; the middle was a giant blur when I got to it. My motivation to complete it was honestly just being able to get it off the to-do list forever, when I was done I posted a before and after to the staff chat (which I try not to do bc it’s not really productive) because I was so excited about it :’))
__________________
We had so much fun learning more about our artists’ jobs! Next up, we decided to sit down with WTP game developer and administrator Teresa!
How did you first find out about the WTP project, and what inspired you to start working as a developer? 
Teresa: A friend I made in the Pixie Hollow community said that her favorite mini game was Bubble Bounce, so I decided to make it for her. I had started prototyping and showing it around, and someone from WTP saw my work and invited me to join the team.
As we know, WTP is a voluntary project. How do you fit working on WTP into your schedule?
Teresa: I’m actually quite good at time management, and I’ve decided to make WTP a priority. That means that I can’t always say ‘yes’ to other things I want to do, but that’s ok.
What are some of the main things you look for when adding staff members?
Teresa: You need to be able to take criticism well and communicate effectively. A certain level of quality needs to be maintained to build a good game, and criticism sheds light on any blind spots you may have. If you aren’t communicating clearly and frequently, then your value to the team is very low – everyone needs to be on the same page so that work doesn’t get redone and wasted, and to keep an accurate development schedule. Being willing to devote more than a couple of hours a week is also a major plus.
How do you decide which parts of the game you should work on first?
Teresa: There’s this concept called the Minimum Viable Product. Basically, you just strip the project down to what is necessary and work out the kinks. Then you can add new features that enhance the gameplay.
What’s the most challenging issue you’ve faced while creating the game?
Teresa: There was a problem with the animation plugin that I was hoping would be fixed by the maintainers before the demo release. It was a really big deal, the game would be entirely unplayable. At the last minute, I had to dig into the plugins source code and figure it out myself. In the end, it wasn’t actually so difficult – but boy was it stressful. Really I would say that the biggest problems have stemmed from not having enough artists on the team! There have been multiple times where we had to delay updates because we didn’t have all of the assets ready for me to use in the game.
How do you go about fixing a game bug?
Teresa: Gather all the info I can from users experiencing the bug, and try to reproduce it. Just observing the behavior is often enough to figure out the problem. When it’s not, check the logs or step through with the debugger.
Have you ever worked on or made a game before WTP?
Teresa: I’ve worked a bit on some 3D open source game projects, never worked on the multiplayer parts before, though. I also make mods for games.
Lastly, what are your favorite and most rewarding parts of being a game developer?
Teresa: Pushing the boundaries of my knowledge and comfort zone, definitely. As a developer, I’ve learned a lot of new technologies and some new domains specifically for WTP. I also find being able to fix things that I don’t like about games very rewarding. Being an administrator has benefitted me as well. As an admin, I’ve had to cultivate skills in team leadership and project management.
__________________
Finally, we interviewed Lavender Merryheart, our sound designer.
First off, how did you first find out about the WTP project?
Lavender: I found WTP from a Youtube video, and played the demo. I was excited to be able to re-visit PH and when I saw the audio designer application, I wanted to help out however I could!
Are you remaking the music from scratch based on any remaining audio from sources like youtube?
Lavender: Both! We salvage what we can, and re-create what’s needed if. In the future, there will be some new, original music too! When we need a sound effect or music, we first check to see if there’s a good quality clip preserved of the original. It needs to be clear and without extra background sounds. If we can’t find any, then I will dissect the sound or song and try to figure out how it was made, then recreate it.
You mentioned that you make new sounds if needed, how do you go about making them?
Lavender: New sound effects are made by piecing different recordings together, such as the audio you hear when you click the talent orbs, which was re-made from the sounds of a heavy book shutting and wind chimes. If we need to remake a song, I make a new track by re-recording each instrument’s part on a midi keyboard. Then it will be edited it in Logic Pro X, using instruments and synths from the Kontakt audio library.
What’s the part of being an audio designer that you’re most excited about?
Lavender: I’m most excited about getting to write new music for the game! I can’t reveal to you what it’s going to be used for yet, but in the process for the last WTP track I wrote, I thought about how to represent the area it will be used for and what instruments and mood would suit it the best. It was a lot of fun to try to both express my style and also give it that Pixie-Hollow-sound!
Finally, how do you fit working on WTP into your schedule?
Lavender: I keep a to-do list and project notes to help organize what needs to be done, and work on WTP between class assignments. To refrain from burning out, I try to spread out my different tasks and work on a variety of things.
__________________
After we learned about what goes on behind the scenes on WTP, we wanted to learn a little bit about some future plans and hopes the staff have for the game. 
Art wise, what sorts of things will be designed from scratch in the future?
Rachel: Although we still have a long way to go before creating our own work as we have to replicate what was in the original game first, I believe that new clothing and hair might be designed from scratch in the future.
Ci: Right now, we’re still committed to restoring the game in its original form–this means that we try not to design anything from scratch. We’ve discussed the possibility of custom content in the future (items + clothing, pets, meadows, maybe even minigames?), and when the time comes, all of that will be built from scratch. That said, pertaining to the look and feel of the original pixie hollow will be a priority for those updates too.
What game feature from Pixie Hollow are you most excited to have?
Teresa: Personally, I am excited for the skill system and wilderness! We have some new ideas to try out, but I don’t want to spoil anything.
Do you plan to have seasonal differences and events, as well as competitions and activities?
Teresa: Yep! Can’t wait! We are already featuring player’s outfits in the shop catalogue, so that’s sort of a mini fashion spotlight, but there’s definitely more exciting things to come. Fashion spotlight was one of the most beloved competitions/events in the original Pixie Hollow!
In the future, will the game be available for mobile and/or consoles?
Teresa: You can already play WTP on mobile! At some point we will have options that allow the game to run smoother on mobile devices. Console versions won’t be a thing, though.
Is there anything that was in the original Pixie Hollow that you’d like to change in WTP?
Lavender: I would change the whisper noise it made when you got a message, it got a bit annoying. And it would be really neat if you could choose from a few different songs to have played in your fairy’s home depending on your mood! I had the ice themed house and have heard the music a few too many times!
Teresa: There are things I want to tweak, and fully plan to! We have already added a couple of small new things, such as the second sitting pose and featuring real player’s outfits in the shop catalogue. I hope everyone enjoys them!
The last thing we wanted to talk about is the staff’s personal feelings about WTP and about their jobs, as well as ask them about their inspiration.
Is there anything new that working on WTP has teached you?
Rachel: As an artist here I am definitely learning new technical skills and developing as an artist in general. Some examples of art skills I’ve been able to develop include creating atlases and spritesheets for fairy clothing and hair, getting familiar with DragonBones as I’d never used it for animation, and just gaining more experience in Photoshop. And I basically just learned all these things by trying them out and asking questions if I needed help.
Lavender: Through WTP I’ve learned more about creating sound effects, because when remaking the old sounds for WTP, I really have to think about what each one is made out of (for example, the pouch sound was re-created using a paper bag rustling, leaves crunching, and a bell synth).
How do you feel about the community growing so much in a short amount of time?
Teresa: I really didn’t expect it, and it has been a bit stressful, but I hope we are handling it well. I would never have imagined that a TikTok would be the reason either! Having more eyes on us makes me feel restless. We had to adapt the discord server to keep it safe and make information more accessible to new members.
What do you remember about Pixie Hollow? And did it change your life in any way?
Lavender: I joined right at the beginning, and loved how it really felt like you were stepping into a different, magical world. My favorite thing to do was decorating and creating/collecting items for my house, as well as the minigames and item crafting/ baking, I’m most excited to see these features again! Also, a good memory from the game I have is going to the summer pool party in the ballroom, and playing games in the tearoom with friends! The music in Pixie Hollow was one of my earliest inspirations for pursuing a career in film/game scoring. Currently I am studying for a degree in film/game scoring! I’m obsessed with fantasy games, nature, fairy tales, magic, and mythology, and I write music to try and illustrate the stories and have the listener feel like they’re visiting the scene. You can hear some of my original music on Spotify under the name June Westfield!
Rachel: I was so young that I have trouble remembering everything. I do remember sometimes getting on the phone with my friends and talking as we played together and explored meadows, which was really fun. I also really enjoyed completing tasks and playing the minigames. I have no idea why that was so fun to me, but I just liked getting achievements and beating my scores.  
Do you feel like some people may have unrealistic expectations for WTP? And do you think it can ever be as big as Pixie Hollow was?
Teresa: Yes, but I can’t blame them. So far I am the only developer to have actually worked on this game, so it’s a lot of pressure, but of course the players can’t know that. For some reason the things that everyone thinks will be the easiest to code are always the more difficult ones, funnily enough. For example, a flying mechanic like the original game is sort of complex, whereas adding new meadows is extremely simple. Do I think WTP will ever be as big as PH? Definitely not. Pixie Hollow had millions of players, Disney advertised it, and it had a full development team behind it. A lot of the original players will have moved on. I’m actually surprised that so many people have found us already!
Are there any artists that you look up to or are inspired by?
Rachel: I don’t have anyone specific in mind who I look up to, but I do watch a lot of cartoons and really admire animation and all of the work that goes into it. I get really inspired seeing different animated works and am super impressed by the entire process of it.
Ci: I used to actively make art outside of WTP and definitely had a whole list of people whose styles I looked up to, but now that I’ve moved away from that I mostly remember individual pieces. I had to dig some up for this question! loish, gawki, and Hethe Srodawa, are a few.
Lavender: Some composers that inspire me are Enya, Faun, Loreena McKennitt, and Secret Garden. They are all fantasy/new age genre artists that create enchanting music!
The WTP community is a great place to make friends! Is there a person in the staff that you’ve formed a strong friendship with?
Rachel: I’ve definitely become a lot closer with many of the staff members, whether it be looking up to certain people like our team leads, chatting with the other artists in DMs and helping each other out, or just having fun conversations with all the other staff members and sharing funny stories and pictures.
Teresa: Asteria is probably the best friend I’ve made at WTP, as we have talked the most. I have also met Kass in real life – she’s the sweetest! I love everyone on our team.
(Kass is one of our moderators - we’ll hear from her in the final interview post!)
And finally, What does working on a game that’s so loved by people mean to you?
Teresa:  It is so heartwarming to be a part of something that brings people joy and makes them nostalgic. Pixie Hollow’s fan base can make me a bit anxious at times. Sometimes a group of players will want one thing, and then another group wants the exact opposite and it can be hard to make a choice. There’s a lot of pressure in trying to stay true to the original game’s vision while also being fresh, but it drives me to deliver the best work I can. I put a lot of time into WTP, and have actually burnt out a few times already. Luckily, I love building things so much that it never lasts long.
________________
Next up in our interview series - our social media team and server moderators! Stay tuned to hear their answers to some of your questions.
16 notes · View notes
meta-squash · 3 years
Note
Your ADHD procrastination post has really stroke a nerve with me. I've had the same issue for years, but thought it's normal for everyone. Since about a year or so, I've been wondering if I may have an undiagnosed ADHD along diagnosed conditions. If it's not too personal, how else ADHD manifests in you? I hope it's okay to ask. I love hearing women's stories about ADHD because they are much different than the stereotypical image of it...
It’s not too personal! (FYI I go by they/them pronouns, but I am afab; it’s all good though!) Also, this got VERY long, I’m sorry! I’m verbose and have a lot to say, apparently.
So I personally have a weird relationship with ADHD. I was diagnosed with it (or some sort of attention deficit thing) when I was in like 3rd or 4th grade. I was briefly medicated but I think I was on Ritalin (I forget) and my child body couldn’t handle it; I was a zombie during the day and then when it wore off at night I was Evil and freaked out and wanted to fight everything. So I went off it pretty quick and didn’t get medicated after, presumably because my parents thought my ADHD wasn’t bad enough.
The reason they probably thought that is because my brother has Really Bad ADHD. Like, all the classic stereotypical symptoms and characteristics to the extreme: never shuts the fuck up, really damn loud all the time, extremely high energy, can learn pretty much anything in about 5 seconds but can’t actually hang on to an interest really (now that he’s an adult he can, but not as a kid), can’t sit still or pay attention in class, doesn’t finish homework, etc etc. I was able to mask mine and function enough to get through school just riding pretty much on my humanities grades alone. It sucked a lot but I somehow did it. I had an IEP (Individual Education Plan, which is a US school thing for kids with learning disabilities and such that allows for accommodations and assistance in school) but it didn’t do much except I think give me extra time on math tests because of my dyscalculia (I was in Special Ed Math my whole grade school career). My mother is an OT but I also think that (as you said) ADHD in afab people often manifests differently than in amab people, so I guess my parents just didn’t know what to look for and that’s why I never really got the same help as my brother.
I like to jokingly categorize ADHD into two distinct but overlapping types: Fast ADHD and Mush Brain ADHD. Fast ADHD (in my opinion; this may vary from person to person) is the classic stereotype symptoms. Fast ADHD’s focus problem is too much happening all at once. Lots of thoughts and ideas flying by and you get distracted mid-thought with another thought, or your train of thought gets really crazy but is super fast so your reply to someone’s comment might not make much sense to anyone else because they weren’t privy to your brain’s journey, or you go down a focus worm-hole and sit and do One Thing all day and forget to surface for things like food/water/bathroom. Fast ADHD has more energy (though when paired with depression that usually manifests as restlessness or anxiety) and is quicker to pick up new things. Mush Brain ADHD is kind of the opposite. Thoughts take longer, or you think of something and then it almost immediately disappears (for example, scrolling a website, seeing something that you want to google, you scroll for like 5 more seconds and think “wait, I completely forget what I was going to look up”). With Mush Brain ADHD it’s harder to have conversations because thought-to-mouth time is slower, rather than (with Fast Brain) lots of stuff is going on up there. Mush Brain often feels like, well, mush and like you can’t really form thoughts very well if you want to do stuff. It’s like you’re trying to focus on thinking a thought but it just slides away. Another way I’d describe it is having thoughts but it’s like they’re on a blackboard and they’re being erased as you think them, so they end up mostly smears. Obviously, this is just based on my own experiences as a Mush Brain ADHD person while my brother has Fast Brain ADHD, so this might be different for other people.
Both have lots of overlaps: executive dysfunction (that’s the big one), insomnia, auditory processing problems, hyperfixation (which is not a bad thing! I love my hyperfixations! They’re fun!), absolutely crap organizational skills, constantly losing things, really bad perception of time, detachment from the world (like you drift off into your own daydream, or things feel distant, but not quite the same as depersonalization/dissociating),  difficulty making choices, sensory processing disorder, crap abilities with money, rejection sensitive dysphoria, and often comorbid mental illnesses like depression, OCD, anxiety, dyscalculia/dyslexia, etc.
 Oh, and a lot of ADHD characteristics also overlap with depression characteristics (and a lot of people with ADHD have comorbid depression, so it really doesn’t help).
But I can tell you about my own experiences with some of these.
The Big One which is basically what that schrodingers motivation post is about, is executive dysfunction. People also call it procrastination (it only kind of is) or inertia. Basically, executive dysfunction is where the difficulty lies in starting the task. You want to do something, but you just can’t get going to do it. You get sort of paralyzed. It even happens with things you like. For example, when I made that post, there was a short (just over 100 pgs) book I wanted to read before the end of the day. It’s a good book! It’s on my reading list! I want to read it! But I just sat on my computer and watched dumb youtube videos because that’s what I was already doing and executive dysfunction makes starting tasks really hard. This happens to me a lot. It can happen with reading a book, or getting up to go to the store and buy groceries, or making a meal, or watching a movie. The movie-watching one happens to me a lot. Basically it’s the brain struggling to switch tasks; you’re scrolling tumblr, and that’s what your brain is focused on, and it doesn’t know how to switch from doing that to doing your bio homework or folding the laundry or whatever the task may be. This happens with “bigger” or more complex tasks too, like starting an art project or starting a new book, because your brain has to figure out all the components of that task (I need these items for my project and this amount of time and I need to use them in this order) which is overwhelming, or it needs to comprehend how “big” the task is (how much time/concentration should I try and commit to in order to read this book) which is sometimes hard to gauge. Oh, also this can happen if you’re interrupted in the middle of a task, whether it’s to do another thing or just to answer a question or something; it’s hard to get back to it because it’s another kind of switching tasks. Aside from the blackboard-being-wiped-thoughts, this is my biggest ADHD problem. I can go more into how I dealt with executive dysfunction in college and now if you want!
Auditory processing issues is another thing that I deal with, although to a lesser extent than some people. It just means it’s harder for your brain to process sounds/talking. Part of this, for me, is because if someone is talking to me but there’s other noises (music, other conversations, general loudish ambiance) going on around us, my brain treats them all as equally important and I can’t focus in on the person talking. Another part for me is in my experience I seem to process conversation different from explanation. If I’m talking back and forth with someone about something and it’s not terribly important, I’m fine. If they’re trying to explain something to me, give me instructions, or read a passage of text to me, it just does not stick in my brain. If I’m helping my best friend with her grad school applications, I have to read the sentence she’s asking me check, I can’t have her read it to me. If she does read it to me, I’ve realized that I try to imagine the words as text in my head so I comprehend it better (it doesn’t always work). Auditory processing issues means that a lot of my conversations in public with people who are not my close friends (and therefore easier to pick out from the noise because familiar and/or easier to predict because familiar) are filled with a lot of me going “what?” Retail conversations with customers are slightly easier because there’s at least a mild “script” that they’ll stick to, usually.
Another one I experience is organizational problems. This one was bad enough that I actually went to a tutor-like thing to help me with it for most of grade school. Basically, I had no ability to organize tasks like doing homework or other activities, so things would get forgotten/lost/never even written in the calendar/etc. I couldn’t do projects because I couldn’t (and still kinda can’t) organize far enough into the future. I didn’t know how to break the project down across multiple days or weeks and make it manageable without totally forgetting pieces of it. I’d forget to write down homework when the teacher wrote it on the board, or I’d write it down but forget to do it. Or I’d do it but misplace it or leave it at home. My perception of time was also really crap; I couldn’t read an analogue clock until I was in maybe 6th grade? Even now I sometimes have trouble. It was hard to know how much time I had to allot to certain projects because I didn’t really have good perception of how hours fit in the day and how much time until homework is due and stuff. (Which meant lots of finishing things in class minutes before I had to turn it in and stuff. Once in uni I completely forgot to do an Entire Essay; luckily it wasn’t a class I needed to graduate.)
Along with this is losing EVERYTHING. I misplace things CONSTANTLY. I’ll put something that’s in my hand down to get a cup of tea or something, or even just to like, move a blanket, and I’ll forget where I put it. I’ve solved this problem with Important Things (wallet, phone, and keys always go next to my bed, for example, and rarely move from there if they’re not in my pocket. All important papers go in my Important Papers Folder as soon as soon as possible) but I lose regular stuff all the time. I’ll be working on an art project, I’ll put my glue stick down to reach for a piece of paper, and lose the glue stick in the time it takes to pull the paper towards me. The other day I was brushing my teeth and I put the toothbrush cover down to say hello to the cat and forgot where I had put it down once I had followed her to the next room. When things have a Place it’s easier, but I’ve learned to live with going “Where the FUCK did I put this thing? I had it a second ago!” at least once a day.
The “Mush” in “Mush Brain” is another big one for me. I don’t know if this has, like, a name? Or anything? It’s just what I call it. The best description for it would either be that blackboard description from above, or like you’re struggling to get to a thought through a lot of mud. Oftentimes I’ll have a sort of concept of a thought but not something full, and I know it’s there, but I can’t get to it. This is really apparent when I’m trying to remember a synonym for something, or trying to elaborate on certain concepts or pull ideas from texts. It doesn’t happen all the time. I was an English lit major in uni, so this affected me a lot back then. It’s sort of a similar feeling to reading the same sentence over and over and not registering the words, except it’s in your own brain instead. This kind of goes away for me when I’m writing/typing. Writing this out is easy (minus me forgetting the word executive dysfunction for like 5 minutes) but if you were asking me to explain this aloud I would struggle, probably. This is probably because I can stare at what I’ve written to see what’s missing or edit my thoughts, which I can’t do while I’m speaking, and also can’t do to other people’s interactions with me.
Just a general inability to focus is also one I struggle with. It goes with the “mush brain” to an extent but I think it’s different. It’s more like my brain doesn’t want to, well, focus on anything. If I’m just messing around on my laptop, that means I end up clicking back and forth between tabs endlessly because nothing is holding my interest. If I’m trying to read or do anything “intellectual” or “academic” it means I just can’t get myself to read or I can’t keep my thoughts on what I’m trying to write no matter how hard I try. Nothing holds my interest for long enough, it’s like brain restlessness. I try and concentrate on doing something, watching something, reading something, and my brain just slides away from it.
Rejection sensitive dysphoria is something I experience on a more minor level. It’s something that also overlaps with anxiety and depression. Basically, it’s a really intense emotional reaction to (perceived) rejection. For example, if my best friend says something to me with a certain tone or gets mad at me for doing something minor, my brain just goes “She hates you! She doesn’t want to be friends with you! You should isolate in your room and never speak to anyone again because you’re so annoying and terrible!” I know that’s mostly incorrect (although I also know I’m quite annoying and that’s another ADHD characteristic; knowing you’re annoying someone in some way and having no idea how to stop) so I can fight it but sometimes I do end up holing up in my room for a little bit. Things like criticism (whether towards you or towards, like, an essay or something) can also trigger this reaction. So can things like having an expectation that you’ll be good at something, and then failing at it or just not being as good as you’d hoped. (I developed a sort of defense mechanism for this one of never expecting to be good at things and never expect higher than a C in a class.) It also can come with a sense of feeling inferior around people doing similar things. It happens to me a lot here on tumblr, actually, because I’ll write a meta about something, and then read someone else’s good meta on the same thing, and feel like I’m an idiot and they’re really smart and nothing that I wrote was insightful or good. It happened to me in uni a lot too. It also happens to me kind of...secondhand, now. What I mean is, my best friend/roommate is extremely smart. Like genuinely one of the smartest people I know and an incredible thinker, straight A’s at uni in a degree she created, etc. She still gets imposter syndrome herself and feels like she’s not smart, and when she says she’s not smart, I feel bad for her but I also feel really terrible about myself, because if she thinks she’s stupid, then what am I? But again, it’s an overreaction to perceived rejection. It still sucks though.
There’s some evidence that ADHD comes with a whacked out sleep schedule. And not just insomnia (although that too, I know this because it’s 7am and I haven’t slept yet lol), but also Delayed Sleep Phase Disorder. Which basically means that most people’s circadian rhythms start slowing down so they’ll go to sleep around like 11pm-1am-ish, give or take. ADHD circadian rhythms are shifted so often we start getting tired around 3am or even 4 or 5am. (This is different from insomnia, btw, with DSPD you can fall asleep fairly easily, you just get tired later in the night; with insomnia it’s an inability to or difficulty in falling asleep quickly.) I always thought I’d just gotten my dad’s night owl genes, but it’s more likely that it’s the ADHD. I also have at least mild insomnia and it takes me a million years to fall asleep a lot of the time.
Hyperfixations are the Fun part of having ADHD (in my opinion). They can get in the way sometimes but they’re also really comforting and nice. Hyperfixations happen when you find an interest and it’s basically all you want to think or talk about, and you relate to the world through it, and you want to learn everything about it. It’s also a characteristic of autism. I’m not autistic, so I don’t know if there are major differences between ADHD hyperfixation experiences and autism ones. Anyway, often hyperfixations stick with you for a good amount of time, depending on the strength, and then you might find something else to focus on. Some of my hyperfixations have lasted a few months, some up to 4 years. A lot of ADHD people rotate through the same or similar ones. For example, a hyperfixation I had back in 2011-2014/15ish was Les Miserables. I then found a different thing to hyperfixate on. This past year I have returned to Les Mis. Hyperfixations are usually pretty cool, because it’s usually something you really like and enjoy learning about or doing and it’s kind of like the thing your brain would rather be doing/focusing on.
Personally, I’ve lived so long without ADHD medication that I’m fairly functional without it just due to coming up with personal adaptations and stuff. The thing that I have the hardest time with/that upsets me the most is the Mush Brain part, which also gets worse when my depression gets worse. I really would love to have clear, quick thoughts whenever I want. It’s frustrating to hold a conversation or try to write creatively and quickly when it takes forever for thoughts to fully crystallize in my brain and then come out my mouth or fingers. Right now I don’t have very good health insurance (all blame to covid layoffs) so I can’t really do the meds thing but I often wish I could. My ADHD is definitely not as intense or severe as some people’s. I have friends, and also my brother, who struggle a lot more than I do, and with different things
Holy hell this was so long. Feel free to message me if you have any questions! Or if you want me to elaborate on some of the things I do to deal with stuff.
3 notes · View notes
zaheela · 5 years
Text
So on a lancaster centric server I did a Chose your own adventure thing.... their first time around didn’t end so well....
-----Story Start----
A plume of dust idly floated away as Jaune stood by the road, sword stretched out in front of him. The tip was unsteady in his hands now, muscles screaming in his exhaustion, but part of him wanted to continue swinging his blade. The now memorized instructions  echoing from his scroll however reminded him to take a break, and almost methodically, he did. The group would have another long day ahead of them, the next town easily being 2 days away, even by wing.
“Though, thinking about it, they would be able to get there faster if I wasn’t so slow.” He muttered to no one, bitter chuckle under his breath as he let his doubts take control of his tongue. With a vicious shake of his head, he banished the thought, they were a team and a team never left someone behind; Ruby would be the first to tell him that.
He left it at that, heading back into the campsite and using the familiar task of removing his gear as a way to drive off the dark thoughts lurking in the back of his head. Flexing his hand, he savored the feel of hard calluses appearing on his palm. Jaune remembered fondly his grandfather’s hands, rough to the touch and as tough as leather to his little hands. He couldn’t remember what his grandfather had said then, but he like to imagine the powerful man promised that one day his hands would be just as strong as his own, holding up the family sword and shield. A shield that - Again he shoved back the dark thoughts and ran a hand through his hair, sweeping aside his bangs. The shield stared back at him, the bright arced shapes drawing his gaze, and next he knew his hand was brushing against the vivid red feather hidden under a wing. His heart ached as the loss chilled him again, but then he realized something else was amiss. Ruby’s sleeping bag was empty. He shot up, ready to wake the others when he noticed that  while her breastplate was still there, her beloved Crescent rose was also gone, most likely settled against its master’s back.
As quietly has he could, he moved to her sleeping bag. It wasn’t worth checking if it was still warm, it wasn’t even used. Most likely she had left the camp after he snuck off to do his training. It had been hours, which made his stomach sink. Grabbing Crocea Mors, he found the one trail, other then his own, that did not lead toward their temporary privy. Following it quickly, he found Ruby not 5 minutes away, perched on a low branch above a clearing, hair down and ornamental feathers missing. Her head whipped up as he approached,  arms unwrapping from their hugging around her knees and moving to both grip the wood and reaching behind her. Owlishly, she blinked at him.
“Oh, uhm….” She fidgeted a little, before looking sheepishly to one side. “Did I wake you?” Her voice warbled a little, her expression pinching into a grimace as she realized how stupid her excuse clearly was. 
“Ah, no, obviously. I mean, Ruby what are you doing out here?” He blurted, eyes darting every which way before settling on just staring at her. The moonlight behind her framed her face, dimming her normally childlike glow and letting the delicate, feminine features take stage. It wasn’t a surprise to him anymore, their journey gave him ample time to watch her and see the lovely young maiden that had blossomed from under her seemingly cherub like shell. His gaze lingered on the pale column of her neck, then trailed upwards, before zeroing in on her tired eyes. There was that look he saw in his own reflection, someone lost, but it looked wrong on her.
“I thought I heard something a few minutes ago so I check it out. Didn’t find anything, and then I couldn’t sleep. Must be all that adrenaline.” She chirped, giving a serene smile and hopping off the branch, and waving a free hand wildly. Before he could call her out, he bit the inside of his cheek, a useless hand frozen half way out toward her. There was that perfect, happy mask again.
Tumblr media
---------------------------------
♦ A) Impulsively, Jaune moved to confront her; This couldn’t be the first time. B) Jaune’s eyes narrowed, but he let his arm fall back to his side. There had to be more to this, but he needed to make sure she wouldn’t have an excuse the next night.
--------------------------------- 
His body moved before his mind could stop him, hand completing its momentum to place itself on her arm. Mouth opening, he froze as he realized what her body language was screaming at him, Do not touch. Her wings clamped down tight against her back and he could feel her muscles jump at his touch, but he had to give her some credit, she didn’t do much more then that. The smile remained as she, after a moment of awkward silence, to pat his hand reassuringly. 
“It was nothing, just doing my job as the watch.” Ruby said soothingly, but Jaune’s own mind filled in the gaps. It was true, she did have the second watch, but then why didn’t she bring up that he hadn’t been at his post when she woke up? It then hit him, she knew about his nightly practice. It wasn’t anything to be ashamed of, he always remained close by in case of any grimm came too close, but why she always insisted on taking second watch now made more sense. She was covering for him, though honestly if Ruby knew, then both Nora and Ren did too most likely. He stared blankly at her moving lips, before she smothered a chuckle at his expense. 
“Wow, you must be tired if you didn’t hear me. You really should get some rest, we’ve got a long day ahead of us!” Teasing him as she pushed her hand off her shoulder, Ruby moved away, wings springing open. “I’m still on watch, don't worry! Night Jaune!” She gave him a quick wave and stirring up a blinding cloud of dust, launched herself into the air. His eyes narrowed as her take off wasn’t as smooth as normal, she struggled to muster the normally smooth, powerful strokes, and almost crashed into a higher branch as she landed. Ruby had purposefully chosen a branch too thin and too close to the other trees for him, effectively declaring that the conversation was over. 
---------------------------------------------------------
♦ A) This wasn’t over by a long shot. He’ll make her talk tomorrow. B) Ruby is smart; It may take a bit, but I’m sure Ren and Nora will help him make sure she can’t wriggle out of it. C) This battle isn’t one worth fighting. Best to just let the topic die.
---------------------------------------------------------
If Jaune was thinking logically about it, he would of remembered that Ruby was stubborn as well as team orientated. But to his defense, girls were hard to understand and contradictory at times. So while Ruby would be quick to talk and support others, she was absolutely as stubborn as a mule when it came to herself.  It was how he found himself metaphorically chasing after a elusive Ruby, who in turn was trying her damnedest to turn all his attention and attempts off to other issues. Endlessly chatty, she played him like a fiddle, turning his own questions and attempts to ask about her mental being against him with innocent commentary and happy smiles. The same smiles a day before wouldn’t of alarmed him, but today he was straining to hold himself back from dragging her off and forcing an answer out of her, leader to leader. Thankfully his own experience with a gaggle of sisters had taught him that such methods were a surefire way to falling flat on your face, if nights of slammed doors and wails of oblivious or bullheaded boyfriends was any indication. Problem was, he knew the cause, but how to avoid that kind of thing was as clear as mud to him.
It worried him, how the corners of her mouth were stretched too tight and the faint tilt of her head, she was still strung up for some reason. He tried waiting for her to leave camp, but she must of predicted his move, staying unmoving in her own sleeping bag, shadows hiding her face until her watch came. She didn’t stray from the camp, diligently tending the fire and keeping watch until he couldn’t keep awake anymore. Jaune could tell she still wandered though, the appearance of a freshly skinned and prepared hare clued him in. While Ren was skilled in many of the culinary arts, the art of skinning and gutting a kill was not one of his skills, and Nora didn’t have the equipment. With a low exhale, he stood up, ready to resort to something that would most likely result in a slap across the cheek, but he was mostly sure that Ruby would forgive him eventually, when a hand slammed down on his shoulder. 
“Hey Ruby!” Nora yelled, momentarily deafening one ear, “Race you to the next town!” before she shoved him back, glancing over one shoulder, then launching herself into the air, with Ruby on her tail. Left behind, he could only stare at the two girls darting through the trees before Ren gave him a comforting pat on the shoulder. “We need to talk, I’m afraid that Ruby’s tendencies are worse then what you think…”
--------------------------------------------------------- 
♦ A) After hearing Ren out, once again, we need to end this quickly before Ruby can get herself in trouble. B) Ruby’s going to get herself hurt, but the others are right, maybe we need to handle this tactfully. C) … 
--------------------------------------------------------- 
Thoughts swirled through Jaune’s head as he motioned the other two to head back to rest at the inn as Ruby gathered up a list of supplies. Ren mentioned how both Nora noticed her sporadic sleepless nights, diminished appetite, and nightmares that plagued her on nights that weather ended their journey early or arriving into a town, as well as her habit of keeping things focused on everything but herself. He got the impression that Ren and Nora wanted to say something about his own… habits, but for now they spoke of caution. “Ruby is going through a lot, give her time.” Ren suggested, his tone soothing and pleading. He gave it some thought, Ruby was struggling, but she was just a little girl, it would just be better for her to get it off her chest and leave the more painful brooding to her elders. 
They always went in pairs to resupply, so Ruby didn’t see much to worry about it, though she kept ahead of him as they walked. Watching her finish her internal debate over Fine grade or extra fine grade fire dust rounds, he took a steadying breath. “Ruby.” He kept his voice firm, like any leader should when confronting an errant teammate. When she glanced at him, he faltered before at the trusting look on her face, but he was a leader, he needed to stay firm. “Ruby, we need to talk.”
“Jaune, it’s not that big of a deal. Maybe some other time, but…” She trialled, unconsciously gripping herself in a self-hug as her mind raced. Again he followed, making the feathers on her wings rose up, as if to make herself bigger, before she turned away to storm off. 
“Ruby! Don’t walk away from this!…Pyrrha!” That made Ruby pause, before standing her ground and staring at him. Her eyes were cold, as if the tables were changed; He was the child and she the adult. His stomach sank as she gave him a piting look, as if she didn’t know what to say to him and his own pain.
“Jaune, I know you miss her… we all do… But…” She doesn’t finish before ignoring his orders, before letting lose a sigh and handing over the bag of supplies. “For now, head back to the inn, I need some time to think.” Before he could say anything to stop her, she turned a corner and disappeared. For a moment, he just stood there, guilt curling in his stomach, in the middle of the street. 
This had gone horribly wrong.
-------------------------------------------------
“Ha, my luck has been really bad lately…” Ruby muttered and then laughed mirthlessly. Mercury only cocked his head before giving her a haughty grin.
“Thems the breaks, brat, but if it makes you feel better, this time this wasn’t planned.” Which was true, he had been sent to pick up a package when Ruby had almost slammed her face right into his chest. They both had reflexively jumped back, her scythe in hand as he removed the safeties off his boots. He shrugged before falling into a defensive stance. Ruby’s muscles tensed, her anger simmering under her skin. Memories of Penny’s demise, his cruel taunts, and then Pyrrha’s anguished screams of pain made her want to hurt him, end him. The wounds were too fresh, her anguish too deep, all she felt was pain upon seeing his face, and all for what? To make a statement? Seeing him here let all her pain and anguish focus her; whoever was behind all of this, to Cinder, she would send her own message. 
For his part, Mercury could feel the blood lust, as rich and vibrant as her scarf, roll over him. It made him shiver in both fear and, in a perverse way, anticipation. The thrill of battle, the humbling of the proud and naïve, made him feel alive, almost savoring the taste of battle. His fists clenching and relaxing he contemplated his opening choices. Offensive or defensive? If he knew Ruby, she would more likely take a defensive stance, most likely offering him the chance to run. It was this wait, this tension, the natural lull in the flow of time that made his blood sing and rush pleasurably down his spine. Now all he needed to do was wait for her to start her noble speech and he’d…
He wasn’t expecting her to reach up and pull off her iconic shroud. Was it some kind of limiter or perhaps she thought it would be used against her? While the latter was true, he had never seen her do this in a fight, hell she’s never seemed to take it off ever! 
The crimson cloth fluttered down to the ground, neither one of them taking their eyes off the other. She shifted, arms lowering as she pulled the scythe back to the side. Her wings spread wide, the vivid red and  soft, downy gray a surprisingly stunning threat display. However, he noticed her left leg slid to the side as she got ready to launch herself. When she did, he would raise his guard to block the blow, giving him ample time to counteratt- He froze as she suddenly let go of her scythe, scattering the contents of an open casing of a bullet, the fine red dust arching towards him. Before he could launch himself backwards, she flapped her wings, sending the dust cloud forward into his face, the impact of the gust setting off the fire dust. Momentarily blinded and disorientated as the air around him exploded into heat and flame, he felt the sharp edge of a blade sink into his side. Only his instinctual need for self-preservation saved him from being bisected. Skidding back, he blinked away the smoke and confusion and scanned the alleyway before him. He caught sight of her again, far out of sight and staring down her scope. Diving for cover, he felt the bullet ricochet off the wall right where his head had been, startling the crowd nearby into running back toward the town. 
It was then he realized she wouldn’t fight like usual. Noble intentions traded for ruthless efficiency, her natural aversion of taking other lives gone. He couldn’t see her face, but he’d bet Emerald’s stolen lien that it’d be looking into a mirror. Cold, focused…Would she also be experiencing that sick thrill of hitting the mark? Doubtful, she was still too pure and innocent to know that, but he didn’t want to find out. He needed to get to her before she managed to off him. He hadn’t survived this long just to die cause some brat felt understandably vindictive. 
-----------------------------------
Falling to the ground, Mercury pushed himself off the floor and kicked her body away as it fell with a heavy thud to the ground off his boot. Gripping the stub where his arm once had been, he laughed. Luck had been in his favor as a small nevermore, attracted to all the dark emotions had dived down towards the woman, giving him an opening he exploited immediately, leaping up and firing a shotgun round point blank into her chest. Her aura had shattered and the pellets inside the shell ripped through her. She lost blood quickly, but was sure she was dead, now all he had to do was somehow stop the torrent of blood pooling around him and escape before her companions found her. Funny, the world was swirling and for some reason he felt the need to laugh as their blood mixed and turned the ground red. 
He stumbled as he remembered she had cut off one of his legs as well as his arm, and finally fell back. He lost too much blood, and Emerald was back in the castle. Letting his head fall back, Mercury focused on the thudding of his heart in his ears. Suddenly the sky above him was no longer unblemished, a small black shape diving down until the bird exploded. Black feathers twisting and expanding until a man replaced it. Mercury felt the cold rush of dread replace the haze of death as he recognized the man, the stink of booze filling his nose. Unlike when  he had run into him while battling the fall maiden or seeing him in the crowd, Qrow’s aura was oozing off of him, as red as blood and as furious as a blade. The bastard said nothing, only stared for a moment. Then a weapon had sunk into Mercury's stomach before the pain hit him. With a twist, he could feel the metal vibrate as hidden gears began to shift, only to have the sudden segmented blade ripped out of the wound. 
“If you think your death is going ot be quick, I’d bet against being the lucky.” The raspiness of his voice made Mercury’s spine shudder. And true to his word, Qrow made sure he kept his promise. At least he could send his beloved niece off with an escort to oblivion, but he had to make sure the shit was properly broken before sending him with her. —Bad end---
31 notes · View notes
artificialqueens · 6 years
Text
Convenient Denial Ch. 1 (Biadore) - Valencia
AN: FINALLY IT ME, THE BIADORE HOLIDAY FIC <3 I’m sorry it’s taken so long, it’s my first time writing fanfic so please let me know how I’m doing - I’d love to get any feedback/constructive criticism :)) The next two chapters are going to be super smutty with a sprinkling of angst/fluff and I think it’ll probably be around 4-5 chapters in total (I might write a pure fluff epilogue as well to finish it off depending on if you guys like it)
Thanks heaps for reading, love Valencia x
Blurb: Roy is convinced the only reason why he misses Danny so much is because they’re such good friends - nothing more, nothing less. Danny is supposedly well over the silly crush he used to have on Roy back in Season 6. As they go on holiday together, feelings surface that neither quite know how to deal with.
Chapter 1
The tensely corded muscles in Roy’s neck and his constant stress headaches are a blaring sign that he needs a holiday. He always a bit on edge lately, but surprisingly he’s been in a good mood the last couple of days –since Adore’s father’s day post. Danny always knows how to make him smile, and the annual father’s day post dedicated to him never fails to do so. Roy can’t quite pinpoint why, but he’s missing Danny more than usual especially after seeing his latest photos online. Not for the first time, he scrolls through Adore’s instagram feed, trying to ignore the way his eyes lingers on the more racy pics. A stupid grin refuses to leave his face as he clicks on Adore’s post to him. He reads the cute caption over twice before letting himself look at their photo. His heart tugs as he sees adorably rumpled Danny. They both look so happy, so content and comfortable in each other’s company. He misses the days during and after Season 6 when it seemed like his entire world was Adore and Courtney. Now all the time they get together is a group dinner every couple of months if they’re lucky. And barely any time with Danny.
Danny’s the one person he misses the most when he’s on the road. He knows exactly when to make him laugh, and when to stay quiet - even though he never actually does, and he’s a pro at reading him right back whenever Roy dishes it out. No one knows Roy Haylock, or Bianca Del Rio as well as Danny does, and that’s why they’re the closest of friends. He just wishes sometimes they could be like normal best friends, be able to walk over to each other’s houses whenever they feel like it and spend lazy Sundays watching trash reality shows, gossiping about their co-workers and painting their nails. He can’t remember the last time they saw each other for more than a couple days.  
Feeling unreasonably sorry for himself, he pushes all thoughts of Danny away. He’s lucky to be given this opportunity to travel the world, he firmly reminds himself, and he’s worked so hard to get to where he is now. But even Roy can tell he’s overworked and stressed, especially judging by the fact that he’s getting all soppy over something as small as missing his friend. He definitely needs a fucking holiday. The thought of a holiday has plagued his mind the last year or so but he’s never let himself commit to going. He dislikes being on a plane a second longer than needed but if he stays at home he knows he’ll end up working again, doing taxes or some other mundane task. Roy decides he has to go relax and unwind, have some drinks and maybe a massage or two - hopefully that’ll work all this tension out of his system.
He trawls the internet, researching destinations and browsing through idyllic beachfront resort photos. For some reason he doesn’t really feel that excited. After some thought he realises he can’t just sit alone in his own company for a week, he’ll be bored out of his mind. But on the other hand, he generally prefers his own company over others. Except for… No.. he can’t take Danny, can he? He mentally checks Adore’s schedule; refusing to admit to himself that it’s kinda stalkerish that he knows her entire upcoming month off by heart. He tells himself that he’s always made an effort to keep tabs on her career only because he’s incredibly proud of her success but it goes deeper than Roy likes to acknowledge - he mainly just likes to know where Danny is, especially when he’s not home. Adore isn’t touring at the moment but she’s fully booked around the States. What if he asks and Danny doesn’t think spending time together is important enough to miss his prior work commitments? Danny’s biggest pet peeve is being called lazy based on his punk drag and throws himself into his work to prove everyone wrong. Roy can’t do it, he’s so nervous even the thought of that conversation makes his stomach lurch. He knows he isn’t going to be able to face the rejection that may follow. With the idea of a holiday dismissed yet again, he pours himself a bitterly strong drink and slowly starts painting his eyes like a racoon for Bianca’s evening show.
The idea of Danny and Roy on vacation together buzzes around in Bianca’s head all night, no matter how hard she tries to concentrate on her comedy gig. Can’t help but get a little lost in the thoughts of having breakfast with Danny every single morning for seven days. Hearing Danny’s sunny laughter when he succeeds in making the younger man laugh and being able to say “See you tomorrow” and actually mean it. Bianca glugs through her drinks like a deprived alcoholic the entire show, trying and failing miserably to get Danny out of her head. Slowly everything starts to get a bit hazy, but that does little to repress the thoughts she’s been attempting to ignore. After a couple more drinks after the show has ended, with yet another stiff drink in hand, he finds himself picking out their seat selection so Danny can sit next to the window.
Roy wakes up the next morning to a pounding headache and a flight confirmation in his email inbox. His stomach slightly twists as he reads over the details.
Holiday resort package for two - Bali - one week.
Paranoia takes over, and he’s wondering how he’s going to break it to Danny - would Danny think it’s weird? Would he assume that Roy is just old and lonely, trying to buy company? Fuck. The older man doesn’t want to hear the hesitant ‘Sorry, I’ve got a lot going on right now’ from his lips, and the guilty ‘oh no, I feel so bad for wasting your tickets’ that will follow. Well. The tickets are already bought so he commands himself to suck it up, grow a pair and let Danny know. It’s his choice what he wants to do.
“I’ve got tickets. A week holiday, from this weekend.” Danny isn’t surprised at the early morning call from Roy or the lack of a greeting. “Oh my god cool! Where to?” “I won them.” He blurts out. Where the fuck did that come from? The white lie just slips out, his subconscious clearly a tad too insecure to tell him the full truth. Danny laughs, “You fucking lucky bitch. I guess once a winner always a winner.” “Guess that’s what happens when you’ve got talent.” Roy retaliates. A characteristic scream laugh from Danny’s end of the line. “Lucky for me I get to enjoy your benefits. So who’s the real winner bitch?” Roy’s laughing into the phone and Danny’s chest elates - he loves making Roy laugh.  He can’t remember the last time someone besides Roy has made him this goofily happy.
“So you wanna come?” “Fuck yeah, I’m down.” It’s only after Roy hangs up he realises with a grin that Danny has agreed to come without even knowing where they were going.
The second his call with Roy ends he’s calling his manager and cancelling the week block. There must be something in his voice, an urgency perhaps, that makes his manager silent for a few seconds on the phone rather than a straight up ‘what the fuck?!’ “You’re sure?” She asks dubiously. Danny’s never asked for time off before. “Yeah man, I really need some time, you know, to take care of myself.” She agrees to postpone whatever she can and Danny is thinking to himself that the stars have finally aligned. He gets Roy all to himself in paradise for a whole week - for free too! They’re going to have time to talk for fucking hours and do every single thing he misses doing with Roy. It’s gonna be fucking epic.
*  * *  * * *  * * * *
Roy tells Danny a later flight time so he knows the messy man won’t be packed. He drags Danny off to the airport with just a carry on each, haphazardly packed last minute. “Do you know what my deepest, darkest fantasy is?” Roy says suggestively, quirking a brow. Danny brain stutters for a split second - god yes, he wants to hear every single one of Roy’s dirty fantasies. “Wha?” He cringes at how he breathless he sounds as soon as the word is out of his mouth but thankfully Roy doesn’t seem to notice. “Travelling with just a tiny ass carry on!” Roy says with a laugh. Danny nods in full agreement, suppressing the tinge of disappointment he feels when he realises the latino man isn’t talking about anything remotely sexual. “Yeah girl, if we’re hauling their asses back on a plane we’re gonna do it without 5 motherfucking suitcases of drag.”
*  * *  * * *  * * * *
“Does our room have a balcony?” Danny asks with puppy dog eyes. Roy chuckles, and Danny nudges him with his shoulder as they’re walking from the resort lobby to the elevators. “I’m serious! I need a balcony for my morning joints.” “It’s not our room pussyfart, we have our own rooms. We’re famous remember? We can afford it.” Roy sarcastically retorts. Their rooms are side by side, almost identical with a king bed and a ridiculous number of pillows on each. Danny cheekily waits until Roy is unpacked before declaring that he prefers Roy’s balcony and that he better get used to him using it. The two look similar - actually Danny’s room seems to have the better view. Roy doesn’t argue though, he knows Danny will be out on his balcony pretty much 24/7 - and he doesn’t mind at all.
“We made it girl!” Danny flops onto the bed like a mermaid, legs tilted together before stretching out into a starfish and rolling around. “And the flight wasn’t even too bad.” Danny had thoroughly enjoyed the seemingly too short flight, mainly because he had spent most of it with Roy’s head nestled between his neck and shoulder. The show they started watching was so good too, even though half his attention was constantly fixed on how close Roy was to him. They spy the massive pool from their balcony and decide to have a dip, overly excited by the fact the pool also has a built in bar. “Wanna get a drink to celebrate?” Roy asks smiling. Danny jumps up without hesitation, “Party.”
They freshen up and make their way downstairs. Roy’s changed into a pair of khaki shorts that are tighter than usual and Danny’s eyes can’t help but trail down his toned back and linger on his round ass. Danny loves the booty, no matter what size or shape, but goddamn - the curve of Roy’s heart shaped ass is mouthwateringly gorgeous. Ugh, such a gorgeous man with such a gorgeous ass. He pushes the thought out of his head as they enter the outdoor balcony seating, he can’t think of Roy like that. He isn’t allowed to, not after the first time around. There had been a period after Season 6 where he let himself indulge in that fantasy. Mistaking every friendly and affectionate gesture as hidden romantic interest only led to the most painful heartbreak of his life – and it was worse because he never had Roy to begin with, so technically he didn’t even have a loss to mourn. But he’s over it now, and as long as he doesn’t let this thoughts stray to what could’ve been, he’ll be just fine.
They sprawl themselves on reclined lounge chairs, enjoying the luxury of ordering their food and drinks poolside. Impatient to swim, Roy wolfs down his noodles in record time and starts to lather on sunscreen. “Wait 30 minutes girl. I got mad cramps swimming after eating pizza once it was not cute.”  Roy secretly loves that Danny fusses over him a lot of the time but he rolls his eyes for dramatic effect. “No need to mother me.” “I’d rather be daddy actually.” Danny pouts his lips and winks suggestively. Roy lies back down to tan as he waits for the food in his stomach to settle and Danny moves himself closer so they can chat over the noise of the busy pool. They start discussing the drama on the tv show they’ve started on the plane, their unending stream of conversation diverging until they’re somehow giggling at each other’s childhood stories.
They’re so wrapped up in each other and it’s only when the sun is setting in glorious streaks of red and purple that they realise how late it’s become. Not wasting any more time, they jump in; Roy swimming long, powerful strokes while Danny splish splashes around like a flying fish. He keeps accidentally splashing Roy in the face, shrieking and pretending to drown when Roy retaliates. They have handstand competitions and bet drinks on who can hold their breath underwater the longest. Danny always wins despite his smoker lungs and Roy playfully accuses him of cheating, jumping on him and pulling him under. “It’s ‘cause I’m a mermaid.” He says with a theatrical hair flip. Roy shakes his head, “More like a siren. Luring trade to their tragic deaths.” Danny blinks up at him with wet eyelashes and a cheeky smile and Roy can’t stop staring at how fucking perfect his face is. He can’t stop his hammering heart either and even though he knows his heart shouldn’t be beating that fast for a friend, especially Danny, his heart gives zero fucks.
They swim until they’re the only two left in the pool and it feels like their entire bodies are pruned. Roy gets out first to get them towels and as the multicoloured poolside lights reflect off the sheen of water on his body, Danny can’t help but gawk at him. Roy’s wearing a thin loose singlet, and seeing it plastered wet on him is almost more erotic than his bare chest. The clingy see through shirt defines the lean muscles of his torso, not leaving much to the imagination yet not revealing everything. God, his thoughts turn dirty so quick it makes his head spin and Danny gets hard as his eyes trail down to where Roy’s tight shorts do nothing to conceal his bulge. He’s trying to think of repulsive and un-sexy things like centipedes and people getting run over by a bus but his efforts get lost in a sea of filthy fantasies where Roy and him share the starring role.
“Let’s go back up, the pool’s closing down. I think the cleaners are getting a bit impatient waiting on us.” Roy’s standing by the edge of the pool, ready to go. Danny shakes his head, wracking his brain for an excuse to stay in a bit longer until he can get his problem under control. His face is an open book and it slowly dawns on Roy why he’s blushing and refusing to get out. “Oh my god are you haard?” Roy teases with a chuckle, his voice involuntarily deepening. “No it’s just- it’s not because of anything- it’s just like- one of those random boners you get you know? When you’re in one position for ages and then you move suddenly-” He’s rambling nervously, looking anywhere but Roy which the older man is thankful for - or else he would’ve noticed Roy heatedly staring at the outline of his hardened cock pressing against his swimming shorts. Roy forces himself to look away. “C’mere, I’ll block you. The cleaners are coming over to tell us to go.” He holds out a towel for him as Danny sheepishly gets out, avoiding all eye contact. Roy thinks to himself that red-faced, embarrassed Danny is probably one of the cutest things he’s ever seen - and accidentally-hard Danny is definitely the sexiest.
103 notes · View notes
pendingtitle-blog · 5 years
Text
overnight
A collection of stories from the CBD 24/7 McDonalds as told by the workers on the battlefields of its busiest nights. The unsung heroes bringing you food at your lowest moments. All their stories and experiences told are true.
Tumblr media
“Treat your men as you would your own beloved sons. And they will follow you into the deepest valley.” ― Sun Tzu, The Art of War
11:00 PM. A Friday night. The horde begins to fill up the Melbourne CBD. A knot forms in your gut. Questions race through the mind: How will tonight transpire? Who will make this harder than it needs to be? What will the toilets end up like? What you do know for sure is the party is about to start. The horde will need to be fed. Sustenance in the form of trans fats and fried goodness. Take a deep breath and enter the barracks. The store is clean for now. Bins are freshly replaced, tables wiped down and the stations stocked up. McDonald’s is ready for it’s beating.
You walk through the kitchen, past the managers' office and into the change room. It’s almost time to clock on. Seven hours of punishment from the general party-going public. Seven hours of providing service with a smile, drained of all energy and enthusiasm. The Japanese warriors of old were recorded to have prepared for battle through specially prepared meals that they would consume leading to a rallying of the troops by yelling “GLORY, GLORY”; which would be met by calls from the generals replying “YES, YES”. The same principle applies in this time. Your special meal is a 50% discounted crew meal or a cigarette behind the store to activate the synapses allowing orders to get out faster. The rallying calls is a change room banter. You shoot the shit with the rest of the crew, hearing horror stories from the past to the soundtrack of your coworkers selected playlists echoing the small room. The guy to your left tells you a story all too common with the disorderly drunks fighting among each other. He’s been here a little longer than you so he’s seen the worst that a Friday overnight can offer.
“I think the worst I’ve seen was this obese woman who started a fight with this guy in the store,” he chuckles “she must have been at least 200kg and she thought this other customer had bumped into her on purpose so she just flew a punch at him,
“It sounded like she thought he was making fun of him for her weight which I’m guessing she was insecure about so it turned into a full brawl with at least five different people trying to hold her back,” he goes on “it ended up with the police being called to break the whole thing up”.
Another question forms in your mind. What in god’s name is driving us to do this? It’s not a complicated motivating factor. Why else would an 18 to 20 year old put themselves through this?
Money. This is what you signed up for.
“Because doing this gets you more money. Also, tons of babes come in and will give you their number if you’re lucky,” he grins.
Time ticks closer. The shift starts soon. One sleeve at a time, button up the front, one leg at a time, tighten the belt, slip your work boots on and tie the apron on. Out into the trenches. Finally, ask to start the shift.
“Yes, yes” the manager replies.
“He will win who knows how to handle both superior and inferior forces.”
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
The greatest armies in history have always relied on coordination and careful execution to subdue powerful forces for victory. Nothing has changed in the present day. Armed with grills, beef, chicken, deep fryers and various other products. Rapid fire production is needed to keep the hunger back. A symbiotic relationship between the front counter and kitchen is needed to keep the peace. One without the other on a night like this would surely end in defeat. An army of eight against the never-ending patrons of Melbourne's ever-booming party scene. It should be noted: this isn’t the case all the time. One hour the store could be packed with order numbers being yelled at the top of your lungs and the customers responding with the ever original catchphrase:
“BINGO!”
The next it could be completely dead with the air being filled from the bleeps and blorps of kitchen. This will not be one of those nights.
Wave one begins. The families and oldies finishing off an old-fashioned night on the town with grease and salt. Children demand soft serves and chippies. The oldies wanting coffee at this hour because how else would one want to finish their night off. Police officers also load up on fuel for their all-nighter of a shift patrolling the patrons of the clubs that will eventually end up in the store.
This will be a litmus test for how the night travels. It’ll show you how busy you’ll end up being, which crew are not up to the task and how awful the bathrooms will end up being. It’s almost a given you get a crew member bewildered by the number of people storming the fort. Putting themselves in no good position to be useful and making a stressful situation even more stressful. Can you blame them though? No one can truly understand what an overnight is until you actually do it. It takes a lot of endurance to make it through a night like this. Even with the consistent sales being made, you ask,  
“Well this is busy, how worse could it get?”
Your fellow coworker replies with the smug grin of a veteran who’s seen it all,
“This is nothing.” A favourite phrase among many of the employees who have worked these shifts.
He continues, “You didn’t work the overnight of the Queens birthday public holiday. That was nasty. It was just me and the boss on the front with two others in the back. We were so backlogged with orders that we had someone from kitchen jumping up to front counter to help get rid of the backed up product while more orders were still coming in.”
The thought of this makes you uneasy and stressed. Nothing is worse than a packed house, nothing but noise resulting in orders being unheard and customers angered because they couldn’t hear. Order 116 being screamed into the void.
His account of events develop further with more horror, “This did not stop from 1 AM to 5 AM. Just constant flow of orders. It would get so bad that I would have to stop taking orders because it would only make it worse. But what resulted was disgruntled drunks now mad about not only not getting their orders quickly but now they weren’t getting served. It was a lose-lose situation for a while.”
A common occurrence on these shifts is that you gain a lot of new perspectives. You don’t have it as bad as you think you have it right now. A lot of this could be a lot worse.
“Thus the expert in battle moves the enemy, and is not moved by him”
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
The halfway point occurs and it’s time for your break. Relieved of duty for half an hour to refuel and revitalise yourself. So far the crowds are exactly what you would expect. Drunk, disorderly and disappointing. But the team has held them back well with little to no disruptions. Successful execution as always. However, the constant flow and attention drawn onto appeasing the crowds made you forget one thing: The body needs to sleep. The constant attention to everything but yourself has distracted your body from the recovery and rest it needs. Sitting down for this half hour to eat and scroll through Facebook, the effects become immediately noticeable. Speech: impossible to understand. Motor functions: harder to use. Sanity: warped. Time begins to slow down and speed up meaning this war will never be finished. The 30-minute break turned into five. Time to end this.
You would never guess it during the day, but the dining area during 12 AM to 6 AM in a 24/7 McDonalds is something else. You begin to understand how wasteful of a species we are. A trash dump is one of the first words that come to mind. Paper bags, boxes, half eaten food, sauce spills, drink stains, melted ice cream, lost wallets and phones all strewn across the tables, floors and seats. Overflowing bins create a greasy stench. The homeless of the city sleep amongst this because it's better than sleeping on the streets. A quick glimpse at the toilets reveals a myriad of monstrosities ranging from faeces on the floor and walls, a flood of urine creating ‘stank’ air as a replacement for oxygen, dried up vomit containing half digested cheeseburgers and used tampons littered about. Six million years of human evolution has lead to this moment. Only you and the coworkers around you can turn this dumpsite into a restaurant that families come into during the day. The bags fill up one by one, ready to be compacted. Where is this waste going to end up? Another landfill? You’re not paid to think about this. You’re being paid to hide it from today’s customers.
Except they won’t let you give you the courtesy to that. The final rush of club goers come in at 4 AM to add more waste and more stress. This rush will be particularly nasty. Complete disregard for everything around them. Settling into the areas already clean. Encamping into spots until 6 AM. Leaving more waste than before to be collected. A strain on everyone’s resources stopping the entire crew from finishing what they need to finish. But that's what sets McDonalds’ overnight workers from the rest of the crop. Endurance of all this bullshit. The kitchen crew will still clean and prepare for the next people coming in. The front counter crew will still stock and clean the restaurant while getting orders out the best they can. The manager on shift will still do the bureaucratic work required to make sure the store continues to run on top of doing what they can to help kitchen and front with what’s needed. A formidable force in the hospitality industry. Unbeatable.
And just like that, the pain ends. The store is clean like nothing happened over the last 7 hours. Everyone is gone and the day is starting for everyone else. Except you. It’s time to rest soldier. The journey home begins.
“Who wishes to fight must first count the cost”
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War
The body knows it must rest now. Your eyelids are drawing heavier and you're drifting off into the realm of sleep. However, it doesn’t end there. Your dreams are invaded by the events of the past shift. Surreal nightmares that take away all control. Every worst-case scenario that the brain could create is presented in high definition terror. A customer has been waiting four hours for their order. The monitor is overwhelmed with products you don’t understand. You keep packing the orders wrong. The whole team despises you. Failure. Hate. Fear. All for your viewing.
You only had to do one. Now, what happens if you were to do it four to five days in a row? You’ve heard the stories told to you by the real troopers who put themselves through it again and again, living on a reverse sleep cycle.
One of the kitchen crew had told you their “sleep deprivation would build up so much that by the time I got to a day off I would sleep around 16 hours literally wasting it, making it become, instead, a cycle of sleep and work”. A beast that keeps on consuming time and energy the more you dive deeper into.
The sleep after one of these shifts is enough to make anyone feel like they’ve wasted a day. Sleeping until 4 pm just to eat dinner then go back to sleep. Time stolen because recovery was necessary. To someone who had to do multiples of these it then felt like “a void,” where they “would be back and forth between the same two places, doing the same things” entering into what felt “like I was in a dream and granted how little sleep I got maybe parts of it was”.
This is what you agree to and there’s no shame in it. You need money and this is the lengths you and the people around you will go to get it. The hospitality industry is known for its horror stories and granted the customers are significantly worse at this time; although, a small minority remain kind-hearted in these hours. The knot unties and now you have permission to rest easy until the next time.
1 note · View note
sainadazai · 3 years
Text
When your crush is angry all the time
Tumblr media
Ch.5
"I don't think fire's all that bad, you know"
3rd person pov
°•○●○•°•○●○•°
As the sun hung high in the sky the h/t haired girl stumbled around the train station in search of a restroom. Y/n had never experienced the mundane tasks a commoner would usually persue on a daily. Things like public transit, or any transit for that matter, were an enigma to her.
So while elder men stared a little too long and young children pointed at her in recognition, she spun in circles like a lost puppy.
"Its just a fucking bathroom, should there be someone here to direct people or something! Ugh and whats with the school girl fetish, these old guy are creeps..." she mumbled to herself continuing to get more and more lost on the platform.
Meanwhile, the rest of 1-A were making their way to internships as well, Midoriya scrolled into some old guys house, Kirishima bumped into his metal replica, and Bakugou held his grump posture and nonchilauntly entered the top 3 heros agency. He was expecting to at least learn something from this guy, or gain real life experience with villains. He never anticipated being scrutinized for his personality. No shit I'm scary, Im trying to kill shitty villains not make teenage girls put a picture of me on their wall.
For the first day of this new challenged everbody seemed to be having a ridiculously mundane time. Not y/n, though. No our main character was going through it, once she made it to the restroom, she got confused by how easily the toilet paper ripped in her hand and spent 20 minutes trying to get at least one whole time out of the stubborn roll. Then, when she opened up her bag to view the new hero-suot her mother helped design...she found strings¿
She ended up having to look at an example picture and read a guide on how to put what where. It took an additional hour considering the tightness of everpiece of fabric and when she stepped out of the stall to look in the mirror, she deadpanned. How could her mother hate her this much? It was already a burden being so sexy, but this? This was crazy.
Tumblr media
She wasnt sure weather she should take a million photos, or never leave the bathroom and cry all day. However when her phone rang, a call from Mr.Woods agency, she realized how late she already must be.
In her rush, y/n also forgot about the creeps men and was recieving many stares, that went unnoticed. Until somebody had the audacity to touch her. It was just a ghost of his finger tips on the underneath of her ass that was no doubt on full display. That would not go accepted, as a girl who had turned her past trauma into nothing but a small personality traits, she wasnt scared. Still, as a woman who absolutely idolizes herself, or so she says, no one in this train station deserved the touch of her perfect, shiny, s/c skin.
The last error that secured her terrible first day was how y/n spun around and grabbed the mans fingertips. When she took a glance at him, he was smiling as if he had acomplished something. Boy was he wrong, only coming to realized so when the y/h girl suddenly had sprouted a vine from his finger.
He watched in fear as it began to grow and wrap around him, all the while the young girl he'd never met before let out a sickening aura that couldve suffocate him then and there. The vine continued to curl up around his middle and ring finger, slowly meeting the flash of his palm.
Once the growing stopped, y/n had almost decided to let him go. A part of her new that her plan wasn't well thought through, and he could be an innocent guy that accidentally touched her.
However, aggression outwayed logic and she looked him deep in the eye.
"You like using these fingers to touch things your not supposed to?"
"N-n-"
"Shhh, dont worry, im just gonna make sure you dont go touching things that arnt yours, okay?" She made an aggresive fist with the hand not touching him and the vine squeezed in. Anyone a foot away would be able to tell, but the both of them could hear how his two fingers snapped and bent under the pressure.
With a satisfied grin at the whispering man, y/n decided he had learned his lesson. Wow look at that, and I didnt even need some manly hero to come save me. Atta girl y/n.
Little did she know that not only did her pro-hero boss come to look for her, but je also saw the whole disaster. He was not pleased to say the least.
Y/n pov
°•○●○•°•○●○•°
As the tree like man sat down in his office chair across from me, all I could do was look to my feet. I didnt feel particularily had about my actions, however, I did feel bad about being late.
While it is fun to be spontanious and act like theres nothing to lose, I wasn't lying when I said I wanted to control the earth aspect of my quirk. Ill never admit it if someone asks, but sometimes the only way I can sleep at night is knowing how strong my quirk is. Knowing that they cant hurt me if I stay strong.
Still, it just seems that as I grow older, the people trying to get to be get bolder and more powerful. Some might even say...they get smarter, too. Thats a scary thought; that if I want to stay alive at all I need to be constantly improving. I am not sure if I want to stay alive or not, but Ill be damned if dying or living isnt my choice.
Feeling the need to break the silence, I began my rant on all the reasons I had come up with that justify my actions. I was planning it on the way out here.
"Look, im sorry mr.woods. I know im not very heroic and shit, but when perverts to pervert things somebody has to do something, and its not like anybody else there would have scared a glance if I didnt save myself-"
"Your wrong."
"Huh- I wasnt done. Anyways i-"
"L/n you are wrong."
"Dude im trying to-"
"There was heroes on patrol, how else did you think i found you? There were real heroes ready to protect you, if you had simply shouted people would have been alarmed of such. I dont understand kids and their need to do everything alone." He rolled his eyes behind his mask and continued to stare at me.
"Excuse me but I dont think your in a place to comment on how I react to myself being touched. He was gonna get my skin dirty and for what, two seconds of his school girl fantasy. Ew."
"Your skin....dirty?"
"Yes, he is nowhere near my standards on someone who should be allowed to touch me...not even a brush of the fingers..ugh!"
"Alright well, I cant get you in trouble because then I get in trouble...so, tell me about your quirk while we go on patrol."
His chair sqeaked against the floor as he stood up and it slid back. Then he motioned for me to follow by painting out the door.
Relieved that I didn't have to talk about all the fake reasons people aren't allowed to touch me, and that I could finally get outside so my quirk would stop suffocating me, I was quick to exit the building.
I'm not sure if its the fact that ive only been using a forth of her, but my quirks side effects have been so shitty recently. To the point that our school nurse estimsted my new rate for being inside for an extended period of time was about three hours.
I havent actually combusted in years, but I've been close and god does it hurt. My chest starts to squeeze and I can feel all the energy drain from my body, then pieces of me start to get hold and cold at the same time.
"So what really is your quirk?"
I looked up at the hero next to me as we continued on down the street of the inner City.
"How much did Aizawa tell you?"
"I-he said...she has all the right elements? And told me I'd figure it out.." He scratched the back of his head.
I smirked at that. Who knew aizawa actually listened to the words I said. I was pretty sure after the whole sulking chrollos dick thing, he would have permanently tuned me out.
"Heh, that raggedy ann bastard" I smile smugly.
"So, what does it mean?"
"Ahh, okay so, did you go to U.A?"
"Um yes kid, why?"
Then im certain je knows of my family, explaining my quirk will be easier. God, this really is my favorite part.
I reached my left hand out, knowing he was right handedly and would respond well to it and then spoke.
"Hi, nice to meet you, im y/n l/n of the elementus royal quirk family."
Once he shook my hand I did a polite curtsey, as I learned in ballet to do that instead of bowing. Its much more fun to do this at family event, where I get to wear big dresses and pretend im important...but this'll have to do.
"The-i-oh shit..." He mumbled the last part in defeat, likely just figuring out what he'd gotten himself in to.
"So, im guessing you've got ...."
"Total control, yup" I confirmed.
"And you wanna focus on earth elements, like what flowers?"
I smirk up at him allowing my aura to put an intimidating facade.
"Actually I was thing more like venus fly traps" as I said traps I let my hands clap together mimicking the plant and bit at the air with my teeth.
He stopped walking and just glanced from side to side, waiting for me to start making sense again.
Until we heard some crying in the distance.
The two of our heads shot over and were met with a strange sight. There were three young boys, looked about 8¿ and a man, hero maybe? Crouched in front of them not looking all that nice. He had spike blonde hair, red eyes, gauntlets on his wris-
"Oh my god its bakugou, look sir! Thats the hot guy I switched schools for!"
"Wha-"
"BAKUGOUUUU!! HEYYY!"
his head slowly shifted from the kids to me and it seemed to only make him more angry. Then, once again I couldn't help but bask in the pure aggression...in his eyes.
They were red, fitting for the anger thry held, but it was beautiful. It was passionate, the way he could yell for hours about god knows what because he cares. He may care about petty things, or silly things, but he always cares so much. So passionately. That I can see it in his eyes.
"Oh my, whAt is this costume deary?"best jeanist spoke from ahead of us as we approach.
"Hi sir, sorry about the skin showing, my quirk is heavily enhanced the more my pours are exposed to the natural elements, especially oxygen. If I was more covered parts of my body would begin to go completely numb. Also doesnt my body look amazing! Im a lot more in shape since you saved me last"
I blamed happily at jeanist. Though we arent neceserilly close, he is definitely a great hero and has always been someone who easily sees through my façaude. Plus his fashion sense is wonderful and I often send him pictures of my outfits. Although he doesnt respond I know he sees them and if they were bad he would be mean about it instead of ignoring it.
"Well. It definitely gives your body..access to that. And the sword?"
Ahh...the sword that I liked to carry. It was now stored in its place on my back.
"Call it a good luck charm, plus, we cant rely only on our quirks, then we are just weak people with strong powers. Rather than strong people."
I was always one to put on a show for him, as I do for lost of pro heroes. Its a lot more fun to say things like your all serious and fancy and smart sometimes. Its my little inside joke with myself, like to laugh at how easily people are awed by it.
Like how even though children were still crying bakgou was staring at me face void of emotion, completely struck at my words.
Definitely not..staring at my body that was exposed. Not eyeing the tight strap that wraps my left leg, that he doesnt know is a funcional lasso.
Noticing him, im quick to avert my attention.
"Hey bakugou~"
"Tch you really went from shitty princess to slutty princess huh?"
"You really went from telling deku you'd be number one hero, to making kids cry on the street, huh?" I challenged
I heard the crying boys laugh a little, just the age reminded me of my brother, Im sure they have nothing in common, but I havent seen any of my brothers in quite some time so I suppose a small part of me was just projecting.
I hated that they were crying, though. Ussually I dont like kids, they are stinky and gross and the main reason people have been ruining my life up til now. However, noticing these three reacting to bakugou in a way I wish emotionally available enough for, it made me feel obligated to help them. Wierd, huh.
"Hey, did that guy use his fire all scary?"
"Yeah, he was gonna kill us"
"Fires scary."
I giggled a bit, I knew fire like the back of my hand. It was the first thing I mastered as a child and the way I see bakugou use it doesnt to the element justice.
"Hm, well, I dont think so...can I show you something?"
The kid in the middle, apparently the braver of them, lifted his gaze from the concrete to meet my eyes. Just as I crouched down to my knees in front of them he nodded up at me.
I smiled at this, proud that I earned his trust for...some odd reason.
My hands formed a cup shape in front of him and I focused my ears so I could hear the blood rushing through my own brain, like waves. This was how I learned to use elements singularly: by using my internally noise to block out everything else.
I first allowed a small line of fire to dance around, now bigger than a candle wick. Then through another, and another as the boy watched carefully. Not yet impressed his face was still caustious. However I continued focusing my energy, feeling my body, the air around me, the heat of the sun, even remember the passion from bakugous crimson eyes.
I as I did so the many small flames twirled and twisted within eachother forming into a beautiful blue and orange fluctuating flower.
Tumblr media
The boy looked into my hands mouth now agape, tears dried, fear gone. Then, again, for some reasons unbeknownst to me... I felt a sense of pride.
He tapped his friends so they would look up and I continued making my fire into different things, birds, planes, people. The kids were entranced.
I looked back to see the two pros staring at me with a certain level of pride mixer with shock. While bakugou seemed at a loss for words. God knows why this time?
"I don't think fire is all that bad you know..."
"Pft, yeah, I know kid," with that I threw my little flames above their heads and let the sparks fall down of them like shiny glitter. Then, overwhelmed with this horrible feeling in my chest. I retreatdd to my boss for the weak. Was that..happiness? Ew.
0 notes
sciencespies · 5 years
Text
A 3-D printed telescope: The analog sky drifter
https://sciencespies.com/space/a-3-d-printed-telescope-the-analog-sky-drifter/
A 3-D printed telescope: The analog sky drifter
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Credit: Robert Asumendi
More
A unique 3-D printed telescope named the Analog Sky Drifter may spark a revolution in amateur telescope making.
In past years, the price of serious backyard telescopes has dropped considerably. Back until the 1960s, a six-inch aperture Newtonian was a ‘big scope,” and the only option to gain access to something larger was to build it yourself. But the advent of two innovations that came on the scene in the 1970s—the Dobsonian mount and the Schmidt-Cassegrain reflector—put serious optics in the hands of backyard observers.
Now 3-D printing technology may just bring things around full circle. So why build a telescope today? Often, constructing your own telescope can give you those one of a kind features that aren’t available on mass-produced telescopes.
In the case of Robert Asumendi, his quest began with looking for a telescope that addressed his severe astigmatism. The result: The Analog Sky Drifter, a unique binocular telescope constructed almost entirely of 3-D-printed parts.
Guiding people to the eyepiece in the dark is always a continual challenge at star parties. We’ve found that after more than a half-century of observing, reduced night vision, “floaters,” and an overall aging of our “Mk-1 eyeballs’ have also taken their toll. Binoculars do add a more comfortable way to enjoy the sky, but they bring their own challenges, including diopter spacing (the distance between the pupils of the eyes is slightly different for everyone) individual focusing for each eye, and more.
Tumblr media
The Space Age-looking Analog Sky Drifter, in the zenith position. Credit: Robert Asumendi
More
Robert’s innovation addresses these with brilliant results. And he didn’t even start with a workshop; he outsourced the designs on 3DHubs at first, before getting his own 3-D printer. And heck, the design just looks futuristic, as well.
We caught up with Robert recently, and asked him to explain some of the finer design points to the Analog Sky Drifter:
What inspired you to 3-D print parts for your telescope design?
Robert: 3-D printing allows you to imagine something entirely new and hold it in your hands a few hours later. I found there were no existing off-the-shelf telescope parts to meet my design goals, and discovered the geometry of some of those parts would be really challenging and expensive to machine. Woodworking, machining and other traditional telescope manufacturing processes were not in my skill set, my garage, or really even appropriate for the task. As someone with a graphic design background and some experience in 3-D modeling, I realized the only thing standing between me and the giant space binoculars I dreamed of was learning a CAD program and the 3-D printing ropes.
Note: The design uses a tertiary, or three-mirror system. This isn’t seen often in modern telescopes, but was once employed in older Nasmyth focus designs in the 19th century. The key advantage with this system is that it keeps the eyepiece level through one axis of the telescope, versus a traditional Newtonian, which often puts the eyepiece high up when viewing at the zenith.
Tumblr media
The forward view of the optical design for the Analog Sky Drifter. Credit: Robert Asumendi
More
The other thing for binoculars—a major factor in why you don’t see these commercially—is that you have a mirror-image left and right side for many components. So it’s more expensive to produce traditionally; twice the molds, twice the tooling, etc. With 3-D printing, you just click the “mirror” button and print the other side. 3-D printing has allowed me to both imagine new parts and keep iterating the design, sometimes dozens of times, until it works really well. It’s an exciting tool that will enable a whole new generation of telescope builders.
What were the biggest design challenges that you had to overcome?
Besides none of the parts already existing? Keeping six mirrors perfectly aligned from horizon to zenith is a more complicated dance than the usual two, especially since the scope collapses in half to save space for transportation and storage. Balancing factors like stiffness, durability, light weight, manufacturability and user interaction while maintaining that alignment is a tug-of-war. Then giving people the ability to touch up the alignment without rage-quitting is something no one had really addressed 100 percent.
How does the Analog Sky Drifter differ from standard ‘bino-scopes’ of the past?
The headline feature is the instant eyepiece and filter swapping. Neodymium magnets turn a three to five minute chore into a 10 to 15 second non-issue. With binoculars, you have to do everything twice, so every task needs to be fast and painless. This leads to a really joyful stargazing experience where the tool disappears and you’re just exploring.
Tumblr media
A close-up cut away view of the 3D printed eyepiece holder, with the tertiary mirror. Credit: Robert Asumendi
More
The 8″ f/5 primary mirrors mean we are collecting enough light to really enjoy deep space objects, but adding 2″ eyepieces means getting all that light in a wide, 2+ degree field. So these wide and bright views through two eyes are incredibly unique to a handful of scopes that have ever existed.
Really though, the Drifter’s biggest breakthrough is the ability to share the views. This scope is an outreach beast. I have two young kids and love doing public star parties, so I really wanted to be able to share these views with everybody. Different people have different pupil distance between their eyes. With hand-held binoculars, everyone knows you just pull the eyepieces apart to fit your head, but this hasn’t been the case with binoscopes. There’s usually a fiddly set of knobs nobody understands in the dark, and then this changes the focus, so you have to refocus for each person. Then people grab the eyepieces and try to move them anyhow, which throws the alignment out and the scope is down for half an hour. Look, people want to grab the eyepieces and move them, so let’s make that the way we adjust PD.
I’ve had the Drifter set up at star parties where 50 people cycled through the scope one after the other, and everyone was able to get a sharp, beautiful view with minimal or no instructions.
How well does the Analog Sky Drifter work out in the field?
It’s pretty amazing to set up a scope equivalent to a 12-14″ truss Dobsonian in 60 seconds. Busy dad lifestyle, check.
Tumblr media
A closeup view of the Analog Sky Drifter’s eyepiece holder. Credit: Robert Asumendi
More
It’s pretty amazing to get a “wow” (or muttered curse) from amateur astronomers and telescope makers with 30, 40, 50 years of observation under their belts. Totally new way to look at the sky, check.
It’s also gratifying when people with vision problems like macular degeneration, astigmatism, or just extreme myopia look through the Drifter and say things like, “Wow, I’ve never been able to see anything like this through one eye,” or “I was thinking of quitting astronomy because my vision has gotten so bad, but this gives me hope.” The true advantage of binocular vision is the image processing power of your brain. Accessibility, check.
The thing people love about binocular astronomy is this: You look up at the night sky with your naked eyes, think “I wonder what’s over there?” or “How’s the Double Cluster look tonight?” and then you just hold up the binos and stare at that spot with both eyes wide open to the gentle rain of ancient photons. It’s the most direct connection to the cosmos. The Drifter extends that same experience from 30x past 200x with serious aperture.
So it invites stargazers back to a relationship with the sky that feels more like exploring. For me, as a 38-year-old, the best analogy is the way the world map from Nintendo’s Legend of Zelda was etched forever into my brain: Through free-form exploration, no prompts, creating my own familiar routes, elective challenges, seeking hidden treasures, always with a feeling of adventure and delight. Looking at the night sky is just a lot more fun that way than scrolling through targets on a hand controller. The map above all our heads is part of our shared humanity, and everyone should get to know it as well as they can. The Drifter makes a great companion.”
How is the crowdfunding campaign coming along?
The campaign is still under development. The funds will build up high-quality 3-D printing capacity, set up an actual manufacturing space, test more accessory configurations, and put in wholesale orders for a couple hundred mirrors. It will also discover a brave crew of 10 beta testers who want to help steer us toward the final production spec. The goal is to launch toward the end of October, so there is a mailing list to keep people updated (a Kickstarter campaign is also in the works) Analog Sky is on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter in addition to the development blog.
youtube
More
More
Tumblr media
An easy view though the Analog Sky Drifter. Credit: Robert Asumendi
More
Join us on Facebook or Twitter for a regular update.
Explore further
What to look for when buying a telescope
Source Universe Today
Citation: A 3-D printed telescope: The analog sky drifter (2019, September 2) retrieved 2 September 2019 from https://phys.org/news/2019-09-d-telescope-analog-sky-drifter.html
This document is subject to copyright. Apart from any fair dealing for the purpose of private study or research, no part may be reproduced without the written permission. The content is provided for information purposes only.
#Space
0 notes
walkingmiracle · 7 years
Text
Isn’t it said that getting your feelings out is cathartic? Let me try to put into words the roller coaster of emotions that the past 2 days have been. Even if it is largely into the void. First of all, to the 13 people that currently follow me: HI! I’ve spent my time in the OUAT/CS fandom 100% passively scrolling through content and enjoying every minute of it immensely. I’ve amassed a following list of 346 blogs that have increased my enjoyment of OUAT and kept me more invested in the show than I otherwise would have been.
Highlights of the rest of this post when it gets long (I know me) in case you want to skip the long version
1. Jen’s announcement rocked me hard, harder than I thought it would. I kept thinking I’d have more time to jump into this fandom actively when the show was still on. Guess that’s not happening now, at least not the when the show is still on part. I’m taking it as a sign to just randomly start engaging with those that I follow over the summer and see where that takes me.
2. The news also spurred me to yell “CARPE DIEM” very loudly at nobody in particular and buy a Gold Pass to the OUAT Con in NJ in October, where Jen and Colin are currently both set to appear. Also bought a duo photo op with them. The thought that I would miss a chance to see these two actors who I enjoy so much when nothing is really stopping me from going proved to be too much yesterday. So, if you happen to see this post and either are going yourself or know somebody that is, send me their way! Special thanks to @alexandralyman for being a dear and answering my questions on her post about the con she’d just been at.
So, it’s no understatement that going to work yesterday morning after seeing Jen’s post was rough. I don’t think I’ve ever reacted this badly to what is essentially to me a cancellation. We’ll see what ABC actually does soon enough, but to me it’s simple: no Emma/JMo=no more OUAT. She was why I gave it a shot right away in the first place, flouncing my usual rule to wait a season before giving a show a shot in case it gets cancelled (I’ve been burned too many times). The only time I was active in a fandom was One Tree Hill back on good old Fan Forum. And there I gave up on the show and fandom before the show itself ended, so this is the only time I’ve been in a fandom when a show ends.
Though my fandom experience this time has been 100% passive, I’m not joking when I say it was still involved. For at least the last two seasons, if not all 3 that I’ve been living in my current apartment, I’ve plopped down on the couch on Sundays when the show is on with my tablet in hand, refreshing and reading people’s liveblogs, flailing over everything in my own space. It’s gotten to the point where I’ve reserved the hour after the show exclusively to sit and look at reactions, gifsets etc. Over the summers I’ve earmarked the day the show’s SDCC panel has been on to do the same over any bit of news/video etc coming out of there. To think I’ll be doing this for the last time next Sunday breaks my heart. It’s become a comfortable routine.
I was straight up sad all day yesterday at work. It’s a miracle I got anything done. I never, and I mean NEVER go on Tumblr while at work, but I broke that rule yesterday, I had to keep checking in to read other people’s reactions, to IDK, feel less alone in how devastated I was feeling? I also got a bit introspective, realizing what an amazing time in my life this show has been with me though. I was sort of rudderless when the show started, had just finished my undergrad, but had a very vague idea of what I wanted to do after that. Other than I wanted to go to grad school in the US. But I still had the task of finding a program I liked and actually get in. I was in a grad program at home that I’d signed up for but my heart wasn’t into. In hindsight I never should have persisted with it for as long as I did, it just made me feel down. So latching onto Emma’s story in that first season was great. Then by February I was accepted into a grad program, and Operation Move to Massachusetts was on!
I find it hilarious now to think that I only got around to buying a TV in my apartment around the time OUAT came back for Season 2. Enter Killian “Captain Hook” Jones, and I knew I was dunzo. CS owned my heart from that moment on. But more than that, he and Jen also. This was also new for me, shipping a ship that, say what you will about what others thought originally, I KNEW they were destined for each other. Endgame. My OTH OTP had been very much not that canonically, and other ships on that show had been less intense for me, though fun at the time.
It was really through the fact I was busy with grad school and stuff that I defaulted to being a passive observer of the fandom. But I’d like to think I chose the right people to follow. I only even started on Tumblr right after Season 2 ended. I don’t even remember what brought me into the light. And following grad school came work, which has been just as busy if not more (I’m finding that the 9-5 lifestyle does not always agree with me). I’m loving it, don’t get me wrong, but there are moments and quirks I could do without. I’ll continue to adore Jen and Colin and follow everything they do. While Jen’s decision still stings, I also understand her on a deep level. In her announcement she talks about wanting to be closer to people that she cares about, it seems having been “owned” for 13 years has taken its toll on her. I’ve been away from my family for almost 5 years now minus that one summer in between semesters (which I spent mostly working) and a recent three months recovering from an accident, and I know I feel like I’ve missed out, and miss them all dearly. So to imagine that for 13 years (yes, she’s gone home every so often for short stints, but so have I, know the feeling) I completely see where she is coming from. She had a fork in the road career wise, and chose to go right in stead of left.
Another feeling that was kicking around in my heart all day yesterday was regret. More specifically, regret that I haven’t had the chance to see these people in person at cons. I never had even the faintest option of doing that back when OTH was on, but to now have the means and opportunity to do so, and to have wasted it? Inconceivable. I thought back to why in the world I hadn’t even tried to get NYCC passes last year. Thought I’d have another shot. Missing out on SDCC passes two years ago had a new hurtful ring to it, knowing I wouldn’t ever get to experience it (if I ever do) with my favourite show attending. Why couldn’t they have come closer to me? Whippany felt so out of the way, impossible to swing even for a weekend. Then I looked and saw one Gold Pass seat just sitting there, in a relatively good spot, just waiting for me. Decisions, decisions. I ended up buying the pass and flight and reserving the hotel when I got home from work.
Ultimately I thought back to last November, when I made another long standing dream come true and saw my favourite band of all time Evanescence in concert in Atlantic City. That was their small tour’s only weekend stop anywhere near me. I got a VIP ticket, was front row center and loved every minute of it. Not even 10 days later I get hit by a truck walking to work. My injuries could have been so much worse than they were, I even avoided surgery, but it necessitated the 3 month recovery at home I mentioned. Thinking that I could have died without ever seeing my favourite band when they were that close to me and I had the means to make the trip down...eye opening. So it is in that same spirit that I thought to myself “CARPE DIEM” and pulled the trip together. If either of them break my heart by cancelling their appearance there at a later date I’ll just have to deal with it then. For now I have something to look forward to and that’s a good thing. I didn’t start feeling better about the news of Jen leaving until I’d done that. Also, I’m about to buy the Killian Jones and Dark Hook Funko Pops on Ebay to compliment the Emma and Hook I already own. Always meant to buy them too, eventually. No more waiting.
If you’ve made it this far, thanks for sticking with me. If you know anyone going to NJ in October, or are yourself, hit me up with a message! I’ll be flailing about it on here plenty I’m sure.
1 note · View note
eirenare · 7 years
Text
Pitioss’ Ruins: my experience + talking a bit about the theory
[SPOILER ALERT!]
So, yesterday was THE day.
The day I was about to finally confront Pitioss and get to know by myself (with no guide by my side and just having seen a couple of screenshots) how much a torture it was... And since it was such a freaking memorable dungeon (worth every single minute of the approximately 6h I spent there), I think this is gonna be a long post. However, I’m going to organize it in parts because, well, if anyone is interested in reading this and just wants to get to some parts, it’s easier like this.
Parts: 
1) THE LANDING
2) THE WALK TO PITIOSS
3) INSIDE PITIOSS
4) INSIDE PITIOSS: APPEARENCE AND IMAGERY
5) INSIDE PITIOSS: PUZZLES
6) CONCLUSIONS OF THE DUNGEON
7) ABOUT PITIOSS THEORY 
(The link was only in that section, but I’m putting it here too just in case someone’s just interested about it but doesn’t feel like scrolling a lot: 
https://www.reddit.com/r/FFXV/comments/5t367b/pitioss_ruins_revelations/?st=j0epe7zf&sh=1111e262 )
1) THE LANDING
I already had the Regalia on the area, got to land it a day or two earlier and went as surprisingly good as to land it on at 1st attempt that day (it was my 2nd attempt in general), something miraculous given the fact that the way I was landing was everything but gracious and that the Regalia ended up being super closer to the wall of rocks, like, 1 metre of separation. PHEW: So close, haha. It was a bit stressful.
2) THE WALK TO PITIOSS
In all honesty, I thought the area before reaching Pitioss entrance would be very tiny, and I was surprised for good when I saw it had a decent amount of terrain to walk.
It would have been scary finding lvl 8x monsters close to the entrance of the dungeon if I wasn’t already almost lvl 90.
It’s nice to just be able to walk around, you can get some photos of the Rock of Ravatogh on other angles. 
Also, there’s a good deal of objects around the area, which is always good, but the best thing is IT HAS A CAMP.
4) INSIDE PITIOSS
This is how I would describe Pitioss shortly: OH MY FREAKING GOD. Buuut I’m not here to talk about it briefly, so here I go.
Pitioss is a dungeon with no explanation for the shit ton of puzzles it has. It’s just the player alone with its wits, challenging the dungeon, trying to figure out everything. The difficulty increases as you advance... but hell if it wasn’t an amazing challenge. Funny fact is, the dungeon title that appears once you enter one, doesn’t appear immediately in Pitioss: you have to do some tasks first.
And well, in this dungeon, everytime you get something right it just feels as if adrenaline and pride is running wild on you. But the thing is you won’t understand some puzzles until you think about them for a while, and you’re going to “die” a lot (did anyone say tons of jumping?). 
Also, the amount of items you can get by doing it is high, and some of the items are really amazing (like the final one, the Black Hood, which makes Noctis automatically evade attacks).
Oh, an awesome thing is that the dungeon it’s divided in areas, and there are respawn points, so if you “die” in area “Y”, you just respawn in a certain point in “Y”, with everything you’ve done intact. It’s just plain relieving.
And now, in the next part, I’m going to talk long about what I think it’s probably the best thing of the dungeon, if not the best.
5) INSIDE PITIOSS: APPEARENCE AND IMAGERY
That aspect just blew my mind, like... Square-Enix did a stunning work with Pitioss. I’m going to explain this in detail because it’s something I’ve overenjoyed.
There’s a black ooze falling from the ceiling and staining most of the dungeon, which looks like the black ooze in Ardyn’s face when he shows his darker side. That alone is already creepy...
But THEN you see the tombstones with faces carved in it on one side and a giant face on the other, surrounded by a glowing red field of energy, and it gets more creepy. And THEN you see the statues of a demon here and there, which adds even more levels of creepiness...
Suddenly, between all that creepiness, you’re seeing in some parts of Pitioss some inoffensive flying little creatures that shine in a soothing blue tone, flying carefree all together. And there’s that giant statue of a man that looks like one of those statues of the old Greece, something majestic presiding the first hall you enter.
And the statue of the woman it’s just beautiful. There’s a theory about it that says it’s the goddess of the dawn, Eos (to me it resembles Cosmos from Dissidia Final Fantasy to be honest), but regardless of who the woman is, and aside from it being gorgeous, there’s a bit of sadness when you get a closer look at her: she is handcuffed, even has a collar around her neck that looks like the ones you would see on a slave or the imprissoned in old times.
Motifs of circles are all around the dungeon too, along with cages, giant metal balls, doors with that classic golden rays stamp, round platforms that look just like the teletransportion nodes of Steyliff and Costlemark... The puzzle that involved that golden, giant rotating sphere made me get a feel of the “Cube” film. And the giant moving “wall” of heated spikes with the giant skull is just freaking IMPRESSIVE in a way that, the first time you see it, you feel powerless and scared.
And if you love lore, you might end Pitioss making yourself question some things... 
6) INSIDE PITIOSS: PUZZLES
The dungeon’s puzzles sure are tricky, even nasty.
You’re greeted at the start with platforms that go down in a corridor that have INCANDESCENT SPIKES, and that’s just the entrance. Later on you’ll have even more spikes and with even more variety: in rotating cilinders, in flat ground/wall, in moving up-and-down platforms, in that freaking giant moving wall with a giant skull on the center... 
Not forgetting the not-so-lovely platforms that moved in certain patterns in a certain area, or the metal ledges and “girders” that look so thin that if you move 1 mm wrong you might just fall.
It took me a bit to understand, by the way, that the round bronze platforms with circle motives in colour (white, red, orange) weren’t teletransportation nodes, but the things that will make you advance by unlocking more parts of the dungeon.
Some of these bronze platforms were hard to hit sometimes, be it because you had to solve other puzzles before, be it because it was jump time. It was easier with puzzles than with jumps. 
With puzzles, well, eventually you get what’s happening, even if it takes you some time. 
With jumps, however, it’s not a matter of understanding, but of doing a good performance... And let’s just say, I’m not the best at it. Some jumps were making me feel dispair, like “I know I can get there by jumping because it’s the only way forward but HOW the hell can someone reach that”.
And probably the thing that was more difficult to me was the one in which you’re basically jumping from stone structure to stone structure, in the dark except for Noctis’ lantern.
The twist is: gravity and perspective work in a VERY random way. You’re just doing jumps you would have sweared were impossible and walking on walls horizontally, only to then find out you don’t have to jump to that structure a bit faraway, but just let Noctis drop, because what seemed going horizontally was just going down.
That puzzle was trippy as heck, and how they changed on purpose the camera perspectives in that level makes it more confusing that if just was gravity messing up with you.
And the thing is, that puzzle lasted for long, and that, along with the fact that we were getting close to 2 PM (our hour of eating), made me pick up a video guide and try to end up by that time. 
7) CONCLUSIONS OF THE DUNGEON
It took me, like, approximately 6h to beat Pitioss, as I told at the start, but it was SO much worth.
I wasn’t sure it would be worth suffering just how much as I’ve read people say, just because of the Black Hood, but what was worth was the challenge itself. 
Even though sometimes raged on the inside and insulted to the air to relieve my frustration (I entered never letting the fact of dying because I jumped wrong an I finished so stressed haha), this dungeon made me feel like a genius when I could understand and resolve most of the puzzles by myself, it made me feel stunned with its amazing visuals, it made me question myself about the lore, and overall, it was downright A-MA-ZING.
Giant flying kudos sent to Square-Enix for making Pitioss’ Ruins. Truly a masterpiece.
... However, that doesn’t mean I’ll come back soon to Pitioss hahaha. 
~ABOUT PITIOSS THEORY~
To finish this wall of incandescent spikes text, I’m going to put the link to the Pitioss’ Ruins theory:
https://www.reddit.com/r/FFXV/comments/5t367b/pitioss_ruins_revelations/?st=j0epe7zf&sh=1111e262
Seriously, give it a look, it’s awesome. There’s so much details in the theory that is just mind-blowing. The story is so freaking tragic I wish the theory was true (or that something close to that would have happened in canon) with all my might... And, to be honest, I could totally see it happening... I just embrace that theory a lot.
As a warning, there’s a mention to the 15 minutes’ gameplay of Gladiolus Episode DLC though! 
Read carefully if you want to avoid what they might say about it... Although I couldn’t resist it and just took a peak — I don’t think it spoils much, in my opinion.
Aaand well, this is!
If anyone is reading this, a big thanks, and have a nice night!
20 notes · View notes
anneedmonds · 4 years
Text
Life Update: What Have I Done?
I’ve had a slightly longer break from work than anticipated; but don’t worry, there’s nothing sinister afoot. I’m not ill, the dog didn’t die, I’ve not had a drastic facelift that meant I needed to hide behind bandages for a month. I was just absolutely shattered before Christmas and then the school holidays (aka “the great relentless abyss of no childcare”) completely finished me off.
I won’t harp on about Christmas not being a holiday – you can read this post from the same time last year and just update the kids’ ages – but it’s safe to say that having a four and two year old is as much work (possibly more) than having a three and a one year old. At least toddlers (generally) haven’t discovered eye-rolling and chat-back. At least toddlers are vaguely amused by wrapping paper, empty boxes and the jangly bell from a Lindt bunny tied to the end of a piece of ribbon. Fast-forward a year and the children now want painting games on the iPad and festive biscuit-decorating sessions.
Anyway, to cut a long and fairly pedestrian story short, I decided to take a few casual days off when school started back last week so that I actually had more than twenty seconds to myself. It was great. On the first of the two child-free days (there were four school days in total but Ted only goes to nursery part time) I stayed in bed looking for second hand velvet sofas on eBay and browsing for vintage rugs on Vinterior. On the second child-free day, which – alas – wasn’t consecutive – I went to Bath in the morning with Mr AMR, had some lunch and then sorted out the shoes and boots in the utility room. Bliss.
So that covers the two days last week when I actually had some proper time off: what of the rest of the “holiday”? What an earth have I been up to, seeing as though I’ve been on a self-imposed social media ban which theoretically should free up about nine hours a day? Here’s a run-down: brace positions, people, it’s a wild ride.
I learnt how to use the scanner thing at Sainsbury’s. Have you used these supermarket handheld beepy scanner things? I’m not talking about the self checkout tills, which are so useless and stress-inducing they make me want to chew off my own feet, I’m referring to the handsets that you pick up at the start of your shop and take around with you, zapping barcodes as you go, so that at the end of your shop you can just pay and go.
No unloading the trolley at the till only to pack it up again and then unload it into the boot of your car.  (Sounds such a ridiculous waste of time when you write it down.) No watching helplessly as your bottle of Malbec slowly rolls along the conveyor belt, straight off the end and then smashes on the floor. No performance anxiety as you try to pack your bags in front of the people waiting in the queue behind you – the pressure as you feel them judging your packing speed and dexterity! The shame as you fumble to retrieve your bag-for-life from the floor! The panic as a loose lime you’ve reached for rolls away, escaping your grasp. You can feel your audience’s eyes trained upon you – they wince as you pack heavy potatoes on top of squishy cherry tomatoes, they breathe an audible sigh of relief when you realise that the milk is leaking and ask if someone could possibly get you another.
“JANET! JANET! Six litres of full fat on checkout nine! The woman’s got a leaky one!”
None of that when you use the handheld scanner. Utter genius, it is. Although I have to say, don’t let your kids mess about with it. I almost paid for eight giant boxes of dishwasher tablets and a “Pressure King” pressure cooker.
I saved over £290 on curtain tie-backs. Yes, you heard me – £290! The one from Samuel & Sons that matched my tasselled curtain (photo above) would have been £300 inc VAT and I managed to get an (admittedly much plainer) version without the tassel but with all the same tying-back abilities in the Laura Ashley sale. Eight quid! The fact that it took me around ninety-five man hours to research alternative tie-backs is by the by. I’m pretty sure my labour costs were more than the original tie-back…
I made Yorkshire Puddings properly for the first time and they were immense. Quite literally. I put a bit too much batter into each tin and they rose to just about fill the top oven. I think one of them was almost ten inches tall. Who cares, though – more is more when it comes to Yorkshire Puddings, surely? It’s the only part of a roast dinner I’m actually bothered about. Next year at Christmas I might just make myself a giant Yorkshire and fill it with gravy. Bit of al dente broccoli. Scrap of turkey and a dollop of cranberry and I’m done.
I took the stair gate off and now Mr Bear the cat is an omnipresent menace. Honestly, life was easier when he was confined to the ground floor. Now that he has free run of the house he sneaks up on you when you’re in the shower, jumps onto your back when you’re sitting on the loo and pounces on the kids’ feet in bed. He’s having an absolute whale of a time. Although I caught him pointing his claws in the direction of my velvet upholstered Soho Home bed the other day and so the gate might have to be resurrected. It’s been so nice without it though – just walking down the stairs, freely, without having to wrestle with the lock and then risk breaking my neck tripping over the frame. We could have taken it down about a year ago if it wasn’t for the cat and his penchant for creeping about the place and using furniture to sharpen his nails…
I did a self-imposed social media ban. Which I’ve already mentioned, but it’s worth saying again: I didn’t look at any social media from the 21st of December until the other day. Amazingly, my screen time didn’t go down, but that’s because I used all of the social media time trawling the internet for furniture bargains. I reckon if you squished all of the time together, I spent a full day and night searching for stuff on Vinterior – the scrolling started to make me feel seasick! (By the way, if you want to get £50 off your first order with them use RUTH CRILLY in the code box. This isn’t a special affiliate setup – anyone who orders with them can get a code.)
Why the social media ban? I just wanted a quiet and relaxing Christmas (HA!) and to properly stop thinking about work for a couple of weeks. The thing is that I have a perpetual internal monologue as I go about my day – I almost narrate my own existence – and because of this I’m always tempted to write down every thought that I’ve had, or record every action. Quite often little things I’ve done can form the basis for a post here on A Model Recommends, or I’ll jot down a thought that will then become a bigger idea which then requires a longer sit-down with pen and paper to elaborate, and unless I absolutely switch off, one hundred percent, the temptation is always there to quickly write a caption or draft a blog post.
So I moved all of my social media apps to a different page of the iPhone menu so that they weren’t staring me in the face when I opened my phone and then I just sort of forgot about them. I can highly recommend it, at least every once in a while. I actually think I have an OK relationship with social media – I’m definitely not addicted and can easily detach myself – but still. A digital cleanse felt pretty good!
Now I’m finding it quite hard to get back to work, however – I’m dragging myself very slowly into 2020, like a giant, jumper-wearing slug. I have been setting myself absurdly basic tasks so that my brain doesn’t go into shock;
email the sofa-fixing man about fixing the sofa, ask him to fix the sofa and how much it would be to fix the sofa. Can he even fix the sofa?
How are you finding the New Year? Did you set any resolutions or do you have a masterplan for 2020? Mine is to try and be more organised with work so that I don’t feel so stressed – plan my content and commitments in advance so that I know what I need to get done, rather than just fitting in tasks at the last minute or late at night. 2020 is the year of the new, streamlined me!
The post Life Update: What Have I Done? appeared first on A Model Recommends.
Life Update: What Have I Done? was first posted on January 14, 2020 at 5:09 pm. ©2018 "A Model Recommends". Use of this feed is for personal non-commercial use only. If you are not reading this article in your feed reader, then the site is guilty of copyright infringement. Please contact me at [email protected] Life Update: What Have I Done? published first on https://medium.com/@SkinAlley
0 notes
Text
Investigating the Writer’s Craft
Task: Write a story for readers your own age. - DRAFT
THE LAST RACE
“What is life?”, I lay in bed thinking to myself. It’s a Friday night and I can’t help but to overthink right as I’m about to sleep. It’s also been exactly a week since I’ve turned 18 and now that I think about it, I’m still so young, yet I feel as though I need to get my whole life together only within the next few weeks. Summer is almost here and I can’t wait to just be off school, so I don’t need to go to classes than work right after, it’s exhausting. My parents raised me to work hard for everything I want and they’re really stern on me graduating from high school and soon going to college to pursue law. I’ve always been good at english and psychology and I wouldn’t mind, but at the end of the day it’s what they want more than what I want.
The more I think about it though, the more it doesn’t add up; You go to school for 18 years of your life. From preschool, to elementary, to middle school and then to highschool. After that, to really succeed, you need to pay thousands of dollars just to get a degree from university just to get a basic 9am-5pm job which most of us wouldn’t even be happy with. Finally after four more years of school,  you end up with an average job, you’re in a bunch of student debt, and there’s probably some sort of underlying passion which you wished you could be doing for a lifetime instead of working under somebody else. At the end of the day, people forget about you. You’re just some average bugger living an average life. But think about it, there’s people out there that didn’t follow this norm. There’s people out there that went, “Screw the system, I want to do what I love and I’ll do anything to get there.” These are the people that are artists, astronauts, dancers, and whatever else exists out there. For me, I’d be a racecar driver if I really followed my passions, but what sucks is that I’m a girl and it’d be very unlikely. Holy. Okay I have to stop thinking so much.
I take a few deep breaths as I try to clear my mind, and the millions of things at the back of my head. I begin to fluff up my pillow and shuffle around to get comfortable, and it’s really not working. Moments later, my phone vibrates, perpetuating not being able to sleep. As I unlock my phone, and lower the brightness, I notice the notifications from my all my friends. Amber, Ayra and Iqra were all out, sending me photos and videos on snapchat since I didn’t join them tonight. They’re more rebellious than I am and have the courage to sneak out. I could never do that to my parents. I grin and put away my phone, under my pillow. I close my eyes to the sound of the rain as it begins to pour, tapping onto my window.
The sun glares onto my eyes as I wake up to notice it’s almost 9 in the morning. I always leave my blinds open before I sleep, so I can wake up early the next day with the brightness of the sun on my eyes. Kinda weird, but I love my mornings. I’m always the first one up. I step out of bed into my fluffy pink slippers and rub my eyes to wake myself up more. I go on my phone to see that there’s a car meet going on today. The sun is out, the weather is warm and today would be the perfect day. Car meets are where all car enthusiasts gather at a parking lot and appreciate each other's modified cars. Here in California,  the vibes are amazing at these meets and I love to see what others do with their creativity. I’m a huge car head and I was lucky enough to work hard and buy my first car just about a year ago when I was 17. My parents help with the insurance and my part time job pays me enough money for gas and parts.
I step out of my room and head to the kitchen to cook up some breakfast. As I take out toast and eggs from the fridge, I admire the sun gleaming onto whatever’s below it. The day is so beautiful, perfect to wash my car. I fit two toasts into the toaster and start cooking a sunny side up. Eggs and toast will always be my go to. Moments later, my whole grain toasts pop out of the toaster, though I allowed my eggs to cook for just a little longer. For some reason, the sound of the sizzle of eggs on a fry pan is the most satisfying thing ever to me. As my eggs are ready, I flip them onto my toast.
As I bite into my breakfast, I scroll around on my phone to see if there are any higher paying jobs. Since I work as a cashier at a fast food restaurant and only get a few shifts a week, I really need something better to support myself.
“Aliyah can you set the kettle please?”, my mom asks from upstairs. Every morning, she loves to have tea, and every weekend it’s our routine to set the kettle when she wakes up. As my mom steps down the stairs, she asks, “So, do you have anything planned for today??”, “umm yes mom there’s a car thing going on today and I’ll probably go.”, “Please make sure there’s no street racing though Aliyah, it’s dangerous and illegal.”, my mom was cool with me going as long as I stay safe. “Yes mommm don’t worry.” As we finish up our small talk, my dad steps down with his pessimistic attitude, “Oh god Aliyah when are you going to give up on that junk car of yours? Just stick to bussing.”, I rolled my eyes as he spoke. Since I’ve had my car, he’s hated it. Especially because it’s manual. But honestly, nobody would truly understand my passion for driving and cars unless they share this passion with me. Both my parents know I’ve been into speed since I was young. From buying hot wheels instead of barbies to go karting since the age of 4.
As both my parents prepare their tea, I run upstairs to freshen up so I can go outside and give my car a beautiful shine. I always wear my favourite Nascar hat which is beige in color whenever I wash my car on a sunny day. As I dress up, I was considering going to a coin car wash instead of just doing it at home with a hose like I usually do. I mean, I do work hard and have some spare change I could use for recreation like this.
I hurry down the stairs excited to drive my car to the coin car wash where all the cool cars go on days like this. “Mom!! I’ve decided that I’ll be going to the coin car wash instead!”, I exclaimed. “Honey that car wash is so far from our house.”, my mom watched me put my sneakers on in excitement. “It’s okay the drive is beautiful and I want my car to look nice for the meet!!”, my mom and dad looked at eachother and my mom agreed on letting me go. I could tell they’re only allowing me since I’m grown enough but if they really had a choice, they wouldn’t want me to shine a car at all.
I grab my car keys which are among many other keychains which I’ve collected over the years. As I step out the door, I right away admire the sun’s reflection on my car. Many would think of this vehicle as just your ordinary, daily car. But it’s a lot more than that. It’s my most prized possession and it took forever for me to save up enough for it. It’s electric blue color reflects my bubbly personality perfectly. Although it’s an older car, it drives like new.  Stepping into my car, I get comfortable and step onto the clutch as I turn it on. My car sounds loud and I’ve invested some of my money into getting a nice exhaust system and intake which definitely paid off. I plug in the aux to blast my favourite tracks, and off I went.
I shifted through the gears as my hair was blowing back with the windows down. It takes about half an hour to get to the good coin car wash with quality products. The other ones around here are rip offs. I enjoy driving, I could do it all day. The view of the palm trees and the golden blue sky, and the feeling of the warm air with a touch of cool breeze was perfect.I was approaching the car wash when I noticed a bunch of other people and their cars parked up as well; Exactly what I thought. I knew there’d be cool cars here and that’s the best part. I pull up and parked my car into one of the slots. From the corner of my eye, I noticed one of the boys staring at me and my car. He was standing beside a lowered, glossy black vehicle which looked amazing. As I turn my car off and step out, I gather the few bucks I had in my pockets for the wash.  
I start spraying my car in water. From being a detailer in my past job, I learnt that you should always start by rinsing the vehicle and all unwanted particles with water before you get into the soap. “That your ride?”, says the boy who was looking at me earlier. “Yup. 6 speed.”, I replied indicating that my car has 6 gears as opposed to the regular 5. “Pretty clean. I was surprised when I saw a girl driving.”, of course he would say that, I rolled my eyes. “Girls can love cars too you know.” I continued to drench my car, and soon began to spray the thick blue soap all over. The boy grinned, “so, do you live around here?”, “About 30 minutes away from this place, close to Ordena road.”, “Ohh I live around there too. What’s your name?”, he continues to ask questions disregarding the fact that we’re complete strangers to each other. “My name’s Aliyah, what about you?”, I gave him a small smile. Getting a better look, he’s pretty attractive. But, I can’t have any distractions in my life just yet and I could tell he’s the type to cause trouble. “My name’s Austin, it’s nice to meet you.” He watches me wash all the soap off thoroughly. “Are you going to the meet today too?”, I take the initiative to continue the conversation. “Yeah, it starts soon. Wanna cruise together?”, as he said that I felt fuzzy inside. “Uhm yeah why not. Let me dry up my car and let’s head out.”, I begin to spiral a cloth around the panels of my car, absorbing all the water.
We both step into our own cars and as he starts his, I admired the sound. Both of us turning the left, we sped up to the lights ready to go. The day was better than ever and now I finally have a friend to come with me to car meets. Both of our windows were down and we were both blasting music of different types, his bass is crazy. I grin as I sped up ahead of him, trying to show off and have some fun. Around these streets, there are barely any cops which is why hosting car meets and speeding is so much easier to do.
From afar, I could hear the music and I could see the groups of cars driving into the lot of the car meet. It’s the best feeling ever to see that view. I slowly pulled up, my new friend pulling up beside me. He sped up to a farther parking spot and I followed, parking side by side. We both stepped out at the same time. “Damn, your car is loud huh.”, he complimented. “What can I say, hard work pays off right?”, we both walked around, admiring the cars of different colors, different modifications. It’s crazy how much of a niche community we are. There’s teens my age, and adults all coming together to share the same passion, an underrated and misunderstood passion.
“So do you come to car meets often?”, asks Austin. Considering the weather always being nice here in Cali, I actually don’t come to meets too often, “Sadly no. I wish I wasn’t so busy with school and work….But that’s what pays for my car parts and my gas.”, Austin looks at me with sincere interest as I spoke; Often times nobody pays attention to me when I go on about cars, so this is new. “You’re a hard worker. I like that.”, I barely know this guy, but he seems so genuine. “What about you? Do you work?”, Austin smiled when I asked that. “Honestly, I’ve been fortunate enough to never having the burden to work.”, when he says that, it’s almost humbling yet sparked curiosity within me. He’s not bragging about where his money comes from, but I want to know. “So, how do you afford your beautiful car then? Let me guess, you’re probably one of those kids that are sponsored by mommy and daddy.”, as I said that, I sounded as if I was envious, but I really wasn’t. “Well, since I’ve loved cars and racing my whole life, I got into some business doing what I love and it gets me around a grand every week.”, as we stroll through admiring the cars and talking, I was more and more engaged in our conversation. “Wait, so you’re like a mechanic or something?”, Austin smiled as I said that. A funny smile that wore an expression that I couldn’t place a finger on. “You’ll have to find out later.”, he left me curious but the way he speaks makes it convincing that he’s probably involved in something way bigger than just being a mechanic. “On a real note though, tell me more about yourself.”, he continued to speak. “Well, I’m 18 and I’ll be going to college in September for my law undergrad. On top of that, I love cars and play a little guitar too….What about you?”, “I’m 18 as well, and honestly, I’m just your average teenage boy who’s getting by. I’ll be graduating top in my class but I’m not sure if I’ll be going to college.”, as Austin says that, he looked at me in a way that was reflective of his fear of my judgement when he said that. Surprisingly, I was kind of relieved I found someone who’s a little different than your average college student. “So what are your plans for your future then?”, “Well, with however much I’ve been earning since I’ve been 16, I want to open up my own shop. You know, for all the cars that need a little bit of work. I guess you can say, I’m a future businessman. Since my father owns a bit of a franchise himself, he can mentor me a little I guess.”, Austin spoke with optimism and although his dreams sound big, a huge part of me believed in him. Just the way he spoke, his confident demeanor. “Well, I’m glad you know what you wanna do.”, we continued to walk around in silence.
The sun was still sitting pretty and the day was still young. “Well, I’ve got to get going. I gotta catch up on homework and you know, just make sure I’m home on time.”, I say. Austin laughed. “You have a curfew?”, he teased. “Uh yeah I do, and I don’t wanna get in trouble.”, I sounded like a little goody two shoes. “Okay okay car girl. When will I see you again?”, I smiled. I held my hand out indicating Austin to give me his phone, so I could give him my number. It was nothing flirty, but just a friendly gesture because I really needed some car friends. Austin gave me a friendly smile. “Wellllll I guess I’ll see you around some other time, it was nice meeting you.”, he sounded formal and said goodbye.
I stepped into my car and drove off, into the rest of the day. It was almost evening time and I know my mom would want me home for dinner later. The air was still warm and the breeze was still a little cool. As I drove, I couldn’t help but to think about the future. For someone who’s so young, I have this constant anxiety. I fear what’s in store for me. Will I be happy? Will I be successful? I also thought about Austin a little, someone whom I’ve met for the first time today, yet I wouldn’t mind hanging out with more. I turn into my neighborhood and downshift to first gear before I park my car onto the driveway.
I step into my house to see both my parents sitting in the living room. “Aliyah your mom cooked pasta, go change and have some dinner with us.”, my dad said as I entered. I ran upstairs to change when I felt my phone vibrate. It was Austin. “Heyyyy, you down to make some money tonight?”, that message was really random and seemed fishy. “Umm, how??”, “Bring your car, meet at crew st. at 12 tonight. You won’t regret it.”, when I read that message, there’s no way I could leave the house that late. I didn’t want to be lame though, especially because I just met him and he seems so cool. “Uhh sure, okay I’ll be there.” I’ll have to find a way to sneak out then. I have to prove to Austin that I’m not some goody two shoes.
After dinner and spending some family time, I wait until both my parents head upstairs for bed. I needed to come up with a plan to sneak out without them hearing; Afterall, this is my first time doing all of this. I remember watching a movie where a kid oiled his door hinges to prevent squeaking, and I think I might have to do that. I wandered in the kitchen looking for some oil and used a spoon. How in the world can I do this without making a mess? I walk over to the side door of our house, and begin to pour some of the oil from the spoon onto the hinges. I’m pretty sure there are way smarter ways to be doing this, but it’s better than nothing. “Aliyah!! Get to bed. It’s getting late.” I almost jumped when my mom exclaimed that from the top of the stairs, it caught me off guard and my heart dropped at the thought of her catching my little scheme trying to sneak out. “Yes mom!! I’ll be up soon.”, I thought about anything else that might need to be done before I get to my room and wait for them to fall asleep. I should be fine to be honest.
I brush my teeth and cleanse my skin before “bed” and wait for my parents to fall asleep. It’s a quarter to 11 and they’re usually knocked out by 11:30 which gives me the perfect time to sneak out and make it to crew st in time to see what Austin was talking about. As I lay in bed and think, I realize that crew st. is actually really deserted and empty. Is Austin trying to kidnap me or something? My gut trusts him and I’m curious as to how he makes money. Around Crew st. there’s no cars, no stores, no houses, no schools, no nothing. It’s just an empty and dark street that everyone avoids just cause it goes nowhere, so it’s suspicious of Austin to want me to meet him there. Before I know it, it’s 11:30 and I was ready to sneak out. I keep my face bare and natural, and slip into my black ripped jeans and one of my crew neck shirts.
My heart is racing as I carefully and quietly open my room door. Before I proceed to tip-toe through the hallway, I make sure my parent’s room light is off; That usually means that they are asleep. I remember my friends telling me to always keep socks on when I sneak out to avoid making any sound from my feet. That idea was clever and actually worked. My palms were sweating as I was light on my feet. And at this moment, the worst thing happened. MY PHONE VIBRATES. The house is so quiet that the vibration of my phone could awake everybody. My eyes open wide and I grab my phone and turn off the vibration setting. This is the worst anxiety ever. I’m going to get in so much trouble. I stay still after the vibration to see if I hear any of my parents get up. So far, the coast is clear and I continue to make my way down the stairs. I slide into my sneakers and make my way out the side door. Oh my god. I made it. I have a bit of an adrenaline rush and I feel rebellious but a part of me loves this feeling. I go on my phone to see where that vibration came from. It was a message from Austin that read, “Hey you comin?”, I replied, “On my way now!” The night felt young and it felt as though I had all this time to myself.
As I step into my car I remember how loud my exhaust is. Oh god, my parents would definitely wake up if they hear me start my car. I begin to think. There has to be a way for me to leave. I put my keys in, and instead of fully starting my car, I allow my car to stay in neutral and I step out and begin to push it off my driveway, so at least the sound doesn’t go directly to my parents’ window. This is so clever. I grunt a little as I push my car off, and hop into the front seat. I start my car, clutch into first gear and drive off into the night. My parents would’ve called by now if they realized I’m out, so the fact that they didn’t means I should be safe.
I drive for about 25 minutes until I turn into crew st. and continue to drive until I find Austin. From afar, I could hear the sound of cars and people and I could see a few dozen cars parked along the side of the road. What’s going on here? As I drive closer, I see Austin with a bunch of his friends. He waves as I park beside him and has a smile on his face. “Your here!!!” I smiled back and looked around. This was like a real life fast and furious. The road was closed off and people are coming together to race one another for money and pink slips. My mom always warned me about street racing, and I didn’t know it was that serious until tonight. “So this is how you make your money huh?” I look onto the road infront of me where there are two cars behind a spray painted white line ready to race. Everyone cheering and mesmerized by the strength of these cars and how they push through the street. I could see people handing piles of cash to one another after each race. Faces of disappointment, faces of pride and faces of adrenaline junkies just like me. “You’re racing tonight you know that right?”, Austin looked at me and he seemed serious. “Hahahah no way! You’re crazy.”, I looked around as I witness pairs of drivers at a time lining up to race and to compete. Each driver going the speed of the full odometer until one of them wins. This is crazy but I love it.
0 notes