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unabashednightmarepizza · 9 months

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𝑆ℎ𝑎𝑑𝑜𝑤 𝐴𝑛𝑑 𝐵𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝐶ℎ𝑟𝑜𝑛𝑖𝑐𝑙𝑒𝑠, 𝑃𝑎𝑟𝑡 7

Tagging: @bloody-mf-bsc, @augustwithquills

Liked by benbarnes, freddycarter1, sujaya_dasgupta and 6,348,672 others

Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes: Wonder where they had gotten these... weirdness?👀

P.S: Continue to laugh. For now. Because one, I'm working my ass off here as you all have fun and two, I'm gonna be feasting on your tears later.😌

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freddycarter1: benbarnes, will you please tell your wife to cool down?😰😧

User6: NOOOO, MOMMY Y/N DON'T DO THAT TO US

User7: They were just in a silly mood, they didn't mean it right?!

user4: Ever since that interview with "Never Have I Ever", she is giving them absolute hell and bitch behaviour except Ben( he barelly saved his ass) lol djdbjc

user9: I missed that one! Why, what happened? user2: They answered "Never Have I stolen anything from the set?" which they all replied with yes and were cocky about it. Y/N then answered that it wasn't because of them being discreet and stealthy but because she let it happen, and she told them she knew everything they have ever stolen. user7: Didn't that put her in a rough situation tho? user2: Nah, she just flipped her hair and dramatically said "I'm rich, I payed for them." dındekjn user12: I wonder how Ben, who is usually the one being bullied by her, was able to save himself? user4: Simple. When he was asked what else he "stole" without her knowing, he answered with a puppy eye "Y/N." and that was how he saved himself from the couch.

User7: Smooth... Very smooth benbarnes😏 Still, we were there before you tho😒😐

User5: It's just the way they are mommy, look, we are your precious babies right? Please don't make us cry.

User2: putting the people begging Y/N to spare their fragile mental health, I'd like to say how Callahan looks like a God but is a cutie pie in Real life... please step on me.

jacktwolfe: Danielle the Axelotl and Freddy... I don't know what Freddy is

Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes: Me too boy, me too... I don't want to know how he did that with his mouth

freddycarter1: I have many talents Y/N, not that you know 😎

Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes: 🫥😶😐😒🤨 Say that to your wife 🍹👎

kittheyounger: 😧😱😨

User9: Ben is such a mood. My life would be in chaos, and the life around me could also be chaotic but as long as I have my tequila and whisky, we are all fine.

User6: Freddy is their New victim lol Love you all💓

User1: I think Danielle is becoming an eagle...

Liked by benbarnes, pascalispunk, tchalamet and 6,921,311 others

Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes: This man is a lot of things. Husband, father, son, friend... Occasionally cool, but never for too long. He told me to take a photo of him to show how cool he is to our son but instead he giggled at his silly father in his own Darkling costume...🥹💓

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user8: With every picture she posts, I gain one year in life. With every photo shadowandbone posts of her, I gain 10 lives.

User2: So precious ❤️

User1: Piercing and charming brown eyes on a man is the sluttiest thing ever.

User5: Y/N, will you ever talk about that first "Lego Date" you and him had that you two became official?

Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes: Maybe in my YouTube channel, if people really want to know, with Ben's permission ofc, I don't see why not? 😊

User3: Y/N the Concent Queen 🙏

User2: Guys, let's not traumatise Ben again with our thirsty comments about him being a real dilf🤣

User13: Darkling: evil incarnate with every possible War crime, perhaps a groomer, manipulative bastard who is obssessed over power... Meanwhile Ben: Babygirlified 42 years old man who simps for his wife and would commit war crimes FOR her and their son and is "the twit with the portrait"

User5: nOoo you didn't just bring Dorian into this djskdjjs

User13: Someone had to

User6: May the lord save us, how were you able to shoot those photos with him so close to you Y/N?

User12: I'd have folded easily

Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes: A little bit of heart attack, swooning for my husband and then definetly folding, everything was fine. It's easy really 🙃😊

benbarnes: Stop saying those things just like that 😊☺️🤭

User14: Ben is melting hard~😏😋

User15: If this doesn't end up with her pregnant again, I don't know what will. Maybe a girl comes this time sjsjsj

User15: Okay, guessing the little Barnes looks like the exact copy of his dad, the kid will have immaculate looks coming from both his dad and momma. LOOK HOW GORGEOUS THEY ARE?!🥹 *crying intensifies ehiel holding the family picture of them in my hands delicately*

pascalispunk: Want to see my little champ and his reaction as well!

Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes: Just sent you the video!

User7: Ben lost to little Barnes today, the baby ADORES his momma🥹

amita_suman: He looses every time anyways🍷😎

User6: Y/N is winning in everything she does, this is her Barbie world💯

benbarnes: My little girl will definetly think of me cool, just so you wait for a few years,love.🙃😤

Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes: And what makes you say we are having a girl in the future?? Maybe it will be another boy who adores me???

Liked by freddycarter1, calahan.skogman, emilia_clarke, emmaroberts and 6,893,561 others

Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes: Another day, another chaotic moment!

1.The fuck hoe? Leave my precious camera alone, do you know how expensive is that? I can give you a toy one, just please go and threaten someone with that cane of yours.

2. I'd like to say, seeing a huge man absolutely melt at the sight of these cuties were pretty funny! Don't worry though, we adopted them!

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User2: Freddy, Y/N already pays for enough, please stay away from the cameras. Those shits are expensive as fuck!

User9: Have a lovely day you two!

User12: Guys, I just came back from her YT video, and the fact that Y/N fucking Y/L/N-Barnes literally went and visited every single one of the cast members, who are already the biggest simp possible for her and almost fainted when they saw her before their door, to thank them personally for how FUCKING amazing they are and how much of a GOD TIER acting they did is just... Ma'am you shouldn't be THAT FUCKING AWESOME❤️💓

User2: she brought gifts for them too! But her explanation is way funny: I brought something edible to all of them because come on, what am I gonna do with flowers? Eat them like a cow? 😒😉😋😁( her face expressions btw)

User5: and with the straightest face possible to mankind djskdjjeks

User4: Thinking about the fact that we're living at the same time as Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes, Ben Barnes, Amita Suman, Jessie Mei Li, Kit Young, Freddy Carter, Patrick Gibson, Archie Renaux, Daisy Head, Danielle Gallighan, Calahan Skogman, Jack Wolfe and everyone else in the cast is... What a fucking Era to live Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes liked

Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes: Okay first of all, I'm impressed by your sheer dedication of writing every single name... And thank you for being so sweet, we are lucky to have fans like you as well! ❤️

User12: Y/N, the mother of us all, the best decision you had ever made was choosing Freddy Carter as Kaz FUCKING Brekker and Ben as Darkling beyond doubt... We can't thank you enough 🙌🫶

User3: Emma Roberts liked her post... Does that mean the new project is AHS? 👀

User14: That would literally top her(near) every project

User15: Someone please include her in a new emoji game, thirst trap video, interview whatever! I NEED MOMMY Y/N AND HER REACTIONS ON EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM

user6: Unrelated but I want to know what was the hardest scene to film for her?

Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes: Anything with that damn goat. It kept either distracting us, or head butted someone. Mostly Kit tho

Liked by benbarnes, freddycarter1, archierenaux3 and 5,978,352 others

Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes: To anyone who calls this cast "A happy and cute family"... I'd like to point out that these six are the worst of them, including yes my own husband.

1. Those little shits after Archie pointed out me tripping on my own feet and my husband daring to laugh( I feel pretty betrayed because why are you cackling amita_suman and jessie_mei_li?)

2. Them, finally able to take a serious photo because damn it, I need to have a decent photo to give to the press! Poor photographers were begging me to keep them serious long enough 🤣😄

View 621,541 comments

User5: We are now at a time when all the women like Y/N had been at least once in their lives...

User8: Wanting to have some appreciation because everyone has been doing exactly the opposire even if we women work hard ASF and even harder than most people?🤨

User5: That too, but no. Homicide. And murder. 😈👹😊

User7: These people + Y/N could break me in half and I'd say thank you mommy/daddy

User5: their laughs are so precious... even if It's at poor Y/N 😁

blakelively: Your husband is there and you are feeling betrayed because of the girls laughing?

Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes: I'm used to him making fun of me since... I'm the weird one in this marriage lol But not Amita and Jessie, we are weird together, why did you laugh at me? 😭🥲

User3: Is that the way we treat her? Is this what her children(us) and little Barnes wants?🤨

Y/N Y/L/N-Barnes: I agree luvie... I was thinking about giving him the couch punishment while my boy sleeps with me.

User2: Mommy Y/N please stoo working too much! Your health matter more and you should spend time with your family and friends!

User13: Y/N, we are grateful you taught Ben the Emoji Language really. Thanks to you, he finally understands the young fans like us and win games 🙃

#ben barnes x you #ben barnes x reader #ben barnes imagine #ben barnes #shadow and bone series #shadow and bone imagine #shadow and bone cast #shadow and bone fanfic #shadow and bone #celebrity au #celebrity reader #celebrities #celebs #celebrity #fluff #instagram au

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rose-sophia-isabella-rogers · 4 months

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A Steel That Went Through Hottest Fire: Chapter XXI - Putting Down Roots

Chapter Summary: A sort of epilogue. Presenting how your and your loved ones' lives look few years after the war. Did you get your happy ending? Or maybe rather a happy beginning?

Pairing: Aleksander Kirigan/Reader, Zoya Nazyalensky/Nikolai Lantsov, Fedyor Kaminsky/Ivan, Genya Safin/David Kostyk

Characters: Aleksander Kirigan, Reader, Nikolai Lantsov, Genya Safin, Baghra, Ivan, Fedyor Kaminsky, Zoya Nazyalensky, David Kostyk

Word Count: 3915

A/N: Smut alert! If you don't like it or are underage, please, don't read from "'No, I've waited long enough,' he says and enters the bedroom with you." to basically the end of this scene. Enjoy! zyoma maya olya – moon of my life eya fyela chi – I love you

Tag list (let me know if you want to be added or removed):

@budugu

@intothesoul

@mizelophsun11

@pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy

@zeeader

@marrymonrich

@wonderland2425

@chelseyyouraverageluigi

@thehufflepuffavenger1

@drinix

You sprint past the corridors of the Little Palace. People usually gasp when you suddenly show up.

'Out of my way!' you shout. 'Careful, coming through! Excuse me! Sorry! Move!'

Most of them quickly jump aside, used to it. It's not the first time they see you racing with time. Some even shake their heads, amused.

Finally, you reach the doors to Aleksander's chambers and open them with a flourish. You stop in the threshold, panting. The owner of the room raises his eyebrows, not moving an inch from his spot by his table.

'Well,' he says, glancing at his watch, 'cutting it close today. A few more minutes and I would go to drag you here myself.'

'This time it's the Queen's fault,' you say, rolling your eyes, and walk to join him. 'I swear, once she finally gives birth, I'm going to visit Nina and Matthias.'

'Can I come with you?' General asks, amused.

'Naturally,' you answer and kiss his cheek in greeting. 'I wasn't planning to go without you.'

You sigh and fall on your chair. The Darkling raises his eyebrows yet again.

'What?' you ask.

'You missed,' he answers. You look at him with confusion. He taps his lips with his finger. You roll your eyes but stand up. You lean down and join your lips. You both sigh and groan quietly. Even after all those years, kissing your husband gives you the same thrill as it did when your relationship began. Same goes with calling him your 'husband'.

'Much better,' Aleksander says, satisfied, when you pull away. You shake your head and sit back down. Kirigan pours you both teas.

'How was your day?' you ask.

'Tedious, as always,' he answers. 'Keeping Novyi Zem and Kerch from killing each other is becoming bothersome. The only reason they're not doing it is thanks to our Crows.'

'Bless their souls, even though they helped to bring you down during civil war,' you say. Your husband nods in agreement.

'You will have to show up tomorrow,' he continues. 'Nikolai has a mission for you.'

You wince. Just what you need.

'You know I hate those meetings,' you groan.

'You're the peace advisor, it's your duty,' the Darkling reminds you. 'The only reason you don't have to be on every one, is because you've been bolting them anyway, because you had new ideas your Durast mind had to test out at once.'

You narrow your eyes at him. He simply smiles and drinks a sip from his cup. He frowns instantly and looks at you with disbelief.

'Did you make my tea grow cold?' he asks.

'You know better than to annoy me,' you answer innocently and drink your perfectly warm tea. You sigh with content.

'I see your trainings with Zoya are going well,' Aleksander says.

'Yes, but I preferred them when she wasn't pregnant,' you say. 'Her hormones exhaust us both. I'm seriously wondering whether she's going to kill Nikolai one day.'

'No, he has a survival instinct,' Kirigan denies, shaking his head. 'The moment the hormones take over, he runs for safety.'

'And leaves me alone with her,' you add grimly. General pats your hand.

'Your sacrifice is noted and appreciated,' he says. You scoff but move your hand to squeeze his. Comfortable silence falls between you two.

'How are things between you and Baghra?' you ask at some point. Your husband shrugs.

'Better, but we still don't trust each other completely,' he answers. 'Which is not fair, because she seems to absolutely adore you. Especially when you scold me.'

'What can I say?' you ask with a grin. 'I've always been her favourite. And don't complain. I'm yours, too.'

'That you are,' the Darkling agrees, smirking at you. His gaze roams over your body. You shiver.

'Tease,' you say. 'I know very well we can't indulge now. You promised to visit young Grisha.'

'Yes, but while I'm away, I can give you something to think about,' he says, slowly standing up. You freeze with wide eyes.

'Aleksander Kirigan, don't you dare,' you warn him. But he stands in front of you and puts hands on the armrests, caging you.

'Or what, [Y/N] Kirigan?' he asks, already kissing your neck. You smile when he calls you that, as usual since you've taken his surname.

'Or I… I… I…' you try to say, but it's very hard to concentrate when he kisses you like that. He chuckles and joins your lips in a passionate, heated kiss. You moan and press yourself to him, wanting more. Needing him.

But he pulls away. You pout. He chuckles quietly.

'I hate you,' you murmur.

'We both know you love me,' he says, winking at you. He sits back down, as if nothing happened, and returns to drinking his tea with that mischievous smirk of his.

'I hope you realise I'm going to take my revenge later,' you say flatly, frustrated beyond measure.

'Oh, I'm counting on it,' he chuckles. You glare at him.

'I promise you, you're going to change your mind,' you say. Aleksander's smile drops when he sees the look in your eyes. He's actually a bit afraid now.

'Still, I can't wait,' he says, trying to regain his composure. You just hum and drink your tea. He can see in your eyes that your vicious mind is already plotting. He gulps. Now he's gone and done it. He's in trouble, he's sure of that.

When hours later Kirigan walks into your shared chambers, he's surprised to see the chambers covered in darkness. He walks tentatively into the room.

'Milaya?' he calls. He gets no answer. He looks into your bedroom but he doesn't find you there. He enters the bathroom… and freezes.

You're in the bathtub. The only source of light is the moonlight coming from the windows. Your body is almost completely in the water. Only your head, neck, collarbone, tips of your breasts and that taunting leg, that's hanging on the edge, are sticking out.

General gulps. Oh, he's in trouble now. He can see that. Even more when you lazily turn your head to him and smirk.

'Hi, honey,' you greet him. 'Do you want to join me?'

Instead of answering, the Darkling hastily undresses himself. He doesn't mind how it makes you laugh. He loves your laughter, so he's happy to hear it, even if you're laughing at him.

'Have I known this would greet me when I come back, I'd have tried to do it sooner,' he murmurs, hurrying to you.

'Well, it was your idea to leave me hot and bothered for a long time,' you point out, slowly raising, showing him more of your skin. He licks his lips.

'So, how are you going to take your revenge?' he asks, watching you straddling him.

'Well, I thought about it,' you start. 'And I decided it's not fun when you're expecting it. So, I'm going to take my revenge another day.'

'That's cruel,' Aleksander hums, kissing your chest, his hands on your hips. 'Now I'll be always anxious, wondering when you will strike.'

'Exactly my point,' you say, grinning, proud of yourself. Kirigan chuckles.

'Do you want to start here or wait for when we're in bed?' he asks huskily.

'Hm, that's a very good question,' you hum and start massaging him. He groans and closes his eyes. He throws his head back.

'Milaya…' he moans.

'Saints, you're really tense,' you say, frowning. 'Looks like you're getting a massage now and the good part will take place in bed.'

'Yes, please,' he grunts and grabs you tighter when you attempt to get up. 'But stay where you are.'

'That is not exactly a good position to give a massage,' you protest, raising your eyebrows. The Darkling opens his eyes and grins.

'But I have a better view,' he explains. You huff and roll your eyes. You shake your head and do your best to give him a massage while on his lap. Which turns out to be a torture because of his groans, moans and hands wandering on your body. Soon you're both hot and bothered.

'So, how about we wash quickly and move to bed?' you suggest some time later.

'Fine by me,' your husband answers, staring at you with lust. You quickly get off of him and you both clean each other. While brushing bodies occasionally, obviously. Finally, you get out, dry yourselves and…

'Aleksander!' you squeak, when he suddenly picks you up, not letting you dress yourself. 'Put me down!'

'No, I've waited long enough,' he says and enters the bedroom with you. There, he gently lays you on the bed. Immediately, he starts kissing every inch of your body he can. He hums, satisfied, when he reaches your womanhood.

'Already wet for me,' he purrs. 'Such a good girl.'

'Hello, I can see you're hard for me,' you huff. He looks up at you and you shiver from the dark look he gives you.

'Only for you,' he declares seriously, causing you to blush. Then, he starts preparing you for him. You gasp and moan, throwing your head back, when his fingers and tongue work magic on your private parts.

'Don't stop!' you gasp, clutching the sheets tightly. He doesn't. He keeps his ministrations until he has you ready for him, drenched in sweat and your wetness. He pulls away and looms over you.

'You're so beautiful,' he murmurs, gently caressing your body. 'My gorgeous wife. I still can't believe I get to call you that.'

'Feel as if only yesterday I was confessing my love to you, huh?' you ask.

'I've been such a fool, denying my feelings for you for so long,' Kirigan says and kisses you gently. 'But now… now I can scream them as many times as I want.'

You smile at him and cup his cheek. He nuzzles into it and presses his lips to your palm.

'Are you going to get inside me or not?' you ask after a moment. He barks a laugh and slowly slides himself into you. You both moan softly.

'Ready, milaya?' he asks after a moment. You nod and he starts moving. Slowly, at first. But he speeds up with time. He wants to hear you screaming as well. His name. How good he makes you feel. He wants everyone within reach to know you're his and he's yours.

'More!' you moan. 'Harder!'

The Darkling takes your legs and puts them on his shoulders. This allows him to thrust deeper into you. He's sure your hips are going to be bruised from how hard he's gripping you. Well, just more to your collection.

'Oh, yes!' you gasp, tangling your hands in his hair. You pull and he groans. He connects your lips and you make out passionately. You move your head and kiss his neck. He grunts when you bite him softly.

'You do realise I have a meeting with a Shu-Han ambassador tomorrow?' he asks, more amused than annoyed.

'I see how she's looking at you, why do you think I did that?' you ask and kiss the spot. 'She must understand you're taken.'

'Maybe you should kiss me in front of her,' he teases you. 'Like you did during that party years ago.'

'Don't tempt me,' you murmur and join your lips again. It's messier now. Your breathing is fast and laboured. You're both close, you can feel it. You moan and move your hips to match his thrusts. He groans and goes even faster.

'I'm gonna…' you pant a moment later.

'Together,' your husband says through greeted teeth. 'One… two… three! [Y/N]!'

'Aleksander!' you cry out, as you both reach your peak. You arch your back and smile, enjoying the feeling of Kirigan filling you up. You deflate after a minute or two, or more.

'Do you want to go again?' the Darkling asks, looking up at you. You laugh and kiss him. Something tells you it's going to be a long night.

Nikolai is taking a walk among the gardens of the Grand Palace. His mind is elsewhere, though. He doesn't even really notice when Kirigan joins him. For a long moment they stroll together in a comfortable silence.

'Congratulations,' Aleksander finally speaks up. 'You have an heir. The line of succession is secured.'

'Yes,' Lantsov mumbles, still in shock. 'I have a daughter. I'm a father. Saints. How did that happen?'

'I imagine you and Zoya-' General starts, amused. The King quickly elbows him to the side with a huff. The Darkling laughs.

'Remind me, why do I keep you around?' Nikolai sighs.

'Because I'm keeping your country safe,' the Shadow Summoner answers. They both stop. Lantsov looks ahead, in the direction of the city.

'It still feels strange,' he says after a beat. 'Our country at peace. Not in a war with anyone. I keep expecting it to explode in our faces.'

'It won't,' Aleksander assures him. 'We've made sure of that. Ravka is strong.'

'And it's a safe place for Grisha,' the King adds, looking at General. 'Like you've always wanted.'

'Yes,' Kirigan confirms, smiling. 'At long last.'

'And we're no longer poor. That's nice as well. I hated being dependant of other countries' good will.'

'You mean Kerch's good will.'

'Yes. Speaking of other countries… are you ready for yet another meeting with them?'

'Do I need to be there? It's your child.'

'Yes, but you're the Second's Army's general… and my friend. I need you there.'

'… Very well. But know I shall hate every moment of it.'

'You think I won't? All those fake smiles, congratulations, blessings… I know it's Zoya's revenge for making her go through birth.'

'That sounds like her.'

They turn around and head back to the Grand Palace. They both smile when they see near the entrance a small gathering consisting of you, David, Baghra and Genya. All of you are smiling. Even Baghra has a shadow of it on her face.

'Does she feel happy and safe?' Nikolai asks, looking at you.

'Yes,' Aleksander confirms, feeling warmth in his heart. 'Thank you.'

'Hey, you did all the hard work,' Lantsov insists. 'I just helped out. I mean, I couldn't really help it. You two have been melting my heart with your love practically since day one. I know you were too busy staring at [Y/N], but I actually cried on your wedding.'

'[Y/N] cried on yours,' Kirigan says. The King looks at him, intrigued.

'And you?' he teases. General chuckles.

'Maybe a little,' he admits. 'It was a beautiful ceremony. And it felt good to see Zoya so happy. And I was right. She's a marvellous queen.'

'Oh, I know,' Nikolai says with a stupid grin. 'I love seeing her showing everyone that there's no messing with her nor with Ravka.'

'I especially enjoy when they cower with fear, seeing her eyes changing to one's of a dragon,' the Darkling says and chuckles. 'After one of such meetings, [Y/N] asked me, troubled, if her eyes turn to the eyes of a bee's whenever she's angry.'

'I've never noticed,' Lantsov says and ponders. 'Do they?'

'They don't for some reason. Thankfully. I imagine she would lock herself in her chambers again if they were.'

'Small mercies.'

They stop. They know they have to join your group and go to accept the congratulations from the delegations of other countries. But neither of them wants to do that just yet.

'So, when can I expect little Kirigans running around?' the King asks, smirking.

'I don't know,' Aleksander answers wistfully. 'We're not rushing. It will come with time. Or maybe not at all. I think we're good with both.'

You finally notice them and smile. You start heading their way.

'How is it Zoya rarely smiles when she sees me and [Y/N] always smiles whenever she sees you?' Nikolai asks.

'She always does,' Kirigan denies. 'You're just not looking then.'

Lantsov stares at him, surprised. He opens his mouth to say something, but just then you join them.

'Everyone is ready,' you inform them. 'We're waiting just for you.'

'We know and we're trying to prolong the moment of going there,' the King explains. You roll your eyes.

'Now you know why I'm always late to the meetings,' you say.

'Can't say I blame you,' Nikolai admits and sighs. 'Shall we?'

'Give us a moment, will you?' the Darkling asks, his eyes focused only on your face.

'Which means you will be joining us in ten minutes,' Lantsov says and shrugs. 'Fine by me. Hah, take even half an hour. I won't mind. Not at all.'

He walks away and joins others. You and your husband stare at each other with smiles.

'Hi,' you say.

'Hey,' General says, grinning. He caresses your cheek. You lean into his touch.

'Moi sol ye tselai,' he murmurs, moving so his lips are above yours. You can't help but smile.

'Zyoma maya olya,' you say. His smile widens. He cups your face and kisses you softly.

'Eya fyela chi,' he says.

'Eya fyela chi,' you reply. He puts his arms around you and hugs you. You smile and breathe in his scent. Safe and sound. Loved. Not alone. You finally have what you've longed for your whole life.

Baghra stirs her tea, waiting. She knows he will come late, as usual. But there will be a smile on his face. A smile she hasn't seen since Luda. She chastised him for his love for her, then. She was foolish, she knows that now. His loneliness drove him to do the unspeakable things. But maybe it was meant to be. Otherwise, he wouldn't have met you. And she knows you're the one that's supposed to be with him. Forever.

There's a knock on the door. The old woman stops the smile forming on her face. Less late than usual, but still late.

'Come in,' she invites him. The door opens and Aleksander walks in. His cheeks are rosy, but she doubts it's from the cold, and there's a smile on his face, like she's expected.

'Forgive me, mother,' he says, taking off his cloak. 'I-'

'Was busy kissing your wife, I know,' she interrupts him and raises her eyebrows. 'Or doing something more with her.'

'Not this time,' he laughs and sits opposite to her. This time she can't hide her smile. He looks at her, puzzled.

'What is it?' he asks. She scoffs. Is it that surprising to see her smiling? Hm. Maybe it is.

'Nothing,' she quickly says. Her son raises his eyebrows. He crosses his legs and arms.

'I know very well it's not,' he says. 'So? Spill it.'

'How commanding,' she says, rolling her eyes. 'You know you're not the Black General here, but my son.'

'You keep reminding me that,' he says flatly. She bites her cheek. Wrong. She's trying to mend their relationship, they both are. But her defence mechanism is working, trying to protect herself, even from her own son. And he always puts his armour on then, also trying to keep himself from getting hurt.

'It's good to see you happy,' she finally manages to say. He blinks, honestly surprised.

'I am,' he says carefully. 'And I have no nefarious plans.'

'I know that you don't,' Baghra says. '[Y/N] is making sure of that. She really is all that matters to you. I'm… sorry I ever thought otherwise.'

'You had every reason not to trust my intentions,' Aleksander says after a pause. 'Even though I've wanted your trust. Wanted you to be proud of me.'

'I am now,' she says, looking him in the eyes. 'Truly.'

He stares at her for a moment. Something blossoms in his heart. Hope? Maybe it's not too late for them yet?

'Thank you,' he says. They talk and drink tea for some time since then. The moment is gone, they're back to guarding themselves, but they're more friendly toward one another. Small steps.

Finally, he puts his cloak back on and leaves his mother's hut. She still refuses to live in the Little Palace. Maybe once their relationship is better? Who knows.

Aleksander walks toward the Little Palace. Grisha who pass him salute him, bow their heads or even smile at him. A few now don't trust him. To others he has proven himself. He's also more open now, more cheerful, so he's not that fearsome anymore. Well, they're still afraid of him, of course, he's still powerful after all, but they're no longer awfully tense around him.

'General! General!' a little girl shouts, rushing to him with her friends. 'Will you play with us today?'

'I'm afraid I don't have time, Clara,' he chuckles. 'How about tomorrow at this hour?'

'Okay!' the little Grisha answers cheerfully and looks at him hopefully. 'Will you bring Lady [Y/N] with you?'

'I'll do my best to convince her to come,' he answers, winking. The girls squeal and run away. They stop a few feet ahead, turn and wave at him. He waves back and watches them joining other Grisha children. He shakes his head fondly and gets inside the Little Palace.

'General!' he hears a moment later behind him. He turns and sees Fedyor approaching him.

'What is it?' Kirigan asks. Kaminsky catches up to him.

'Are you going to dinner today?' he asks.

'I might as well,' the Darkling sighs. '[Y/N] said she has some project she wants to finish, so she may be late. Why?'

'I just wanted to warn you,' the Heartrender explains. 'Zoya said she may drop by.'

'Ah, good to know,' the Shadow Summoner says and nods. 'Thank you, Fedyor.'

'No problem,' Kaminsky says with a smile and goes on his way. Kirigan goes to his chambers and gets to work.

A few hours later he goes to the dining hall. He frowns, as he gets closer. Usually, he can already hear Grisha chatting. But now it's suspiciously silent. He cautiously opens the door.

He stops dead in his tracks. In the middle of the room, there is a giant birthday cake. Every Grisha is standing behind it, Nikolai and some officials as well. But his eyes are on you, standing a bit to the right to the cake (Ivan, obviously, close by). You smile.

'Happy birthday, Aleksander,' you say. 'Come here and make a wish.'

Suddenly, everything strange from today makes sense. How his mother has insisted he comes and visits her. How earlier you stopped him from getting in here, distracting him with kisses and sweet words. A surprise party. Just for him.

'You didn't have to,' he says, touched, as he walks to the cake.

'Shut up and blow out the candles, so I could have cake,' Zoya says. General chuckles and stops in front of the desert. He stares at it for a moment. Then, he closes his eyes and blows out the candles. Everyone cheers and the cake is quickly cut into pieces.

'Thank you, lapushka,' he says, when you walk to him. 'Truly.'

'Of course,' you say. 'You're not going to tell me your wish, are you?'

'No,' the Darkling says, pulling you to himself. He kisses the top of your head with a smile and looks around the room, at the happy faces, at his friends, thinking about his wish.

Please, let me, and people I care about, continue to be this happy.

A/N: Thank you so much for reading this story! Thank you for every comment, likes and reblogs, and I hope you will let me know what you think of this end. Because this is the finale of the story of Aleksander and his Durast Girl. I really hope you enjoyed it. As to what's next, I have some ideas, but I'm not sure when I will post something new with this pair. Thank you and I hope to see you again!

This story can also be found on Archive of Our Own: https://archiveofourown.org/works/52696933/chapters/135806941

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where-theres-smoak-2 · 1 year

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Ok I am in rant mode again, sorry, this blog just happens to be a place where I dump all my thoughts negative and positive both, unfortunately for all who follow me. But I have seen some bad and incorrect takes from anti darkling/darklinas. So here’s just a few things I want to say.

Firstly LB has never stated that she based the darkling on her ab*sive ex. This is misinformation that was spread by antis. The only thing she has ever said about an ab*sive relationship was that she wrote the first book, Shadow and Bone, at a dark time in her life right after she had got out of a bad relationship. She has said in the past that the darkling was inspired by every bad boy she’s had a crush on in fiction including david bowie’s the goblin king.

So it seems from these comments like the character was supposed to emulate those types of characters that woman find attractive, the ones you would fall for.

I’ve also seen the argument that LB clearly wrote the darkling as a villain, well LB might disagree with you there as she herself has said on multiple occasions that she doesn’t write villains:

LB says that the darkling believes he is doing the right thing and that ‘you can make a case for most of the choices he makes, even the despicable ones.’ So if LB says that she doesn’t write villains and that you can make a case for his actions you can’t really blame darkling fans for doing the same.

The truth is LB promoted the heck out of both the darkling and darklina (or as it was known back then Darlina and Alarkling) when she was writing the og trilogy, even admitting to ‘fanning the flames’ when talking about people shipping m*lina and darklina and was clearly encouraging the shipping of both ships:

She also put out teases for the darkling and darklina:

And promoted darklina fan edits even using the ship tags:

It was only post the release of book three that she changed her tune, likely because of all the backlash she got about the ending of the books. So no LB wasn’t always against fans shipping darklina or liking the darkling. All of this information is easily found with a simple google search, I wasn’t even in the fandom back then being a show watcher first and yet I was still able to learn all of this with minimal difficulty.

Which brings me to the whole darklina being an allegory for a older man manipulating a younger girl and how the darklina fans ‘missed this’. Well if they did miss it then it was for a very good reason, but the truth is darklina’s didn’t miss it, we just didn’t think it made sense within the narrative, the darklina fandom have talked about it, myself included, in fact I’ve already posted a whole pretty much essay on the topic. But let me explain why some people may have ‘missed it’ and why it doesn’t work in the story or with darklina as the allegory. The first is because LB chose to use an immortal/immortal couple for this allegory. The thing with immortality in fiction, especially as love interests, is it makes age pretty much meaningless. The whole point of immortals is that they are ageless. Immortal ships have always been accepted within fiction and this whole age gap issue has never come up before. Nobody was going omg but the age gap yuck with Bella and Edward when twilight came out, or when Magnus and Alec got together in Shadowhunters or with any of the ships in Vampire Diaries. Yet now anti’s are trying to use the argument that the darkling is 100s of years older than Alina and that’s creepy all of a sudden. Sorry but not in my book, an immortal is always going to be significantly older than anyone else what’s the alternative they spend eternity alone, never knowing love? At least with darklina they are both immortal. Another reason why it doesn’t work is because of how the darkling is described in the book, he is said to not look much older than Alina, so in the books he looks like a teenager. So of course people weren’t going to pick up on the older guy/younger girl allegory because the darkling isn’t presented in the books as an older guy. He’s described the same way every other immortal being in every YA book at that time was. It’s also worth noting that I am not sure if LB ever actually said that darklina were supposed to represent a older guy with a younger girl or whether that was something the fandom came up with. I’m not saying she didn’t just that I myself have never seen a direct quote from her that I recall and I wasn’t able to find one. I think the first time I heard of it was when someone sent me an ask about the topic. I know that she has said it was meant to serve as a warning of attractive and charismatic men being able to manipulate young girls but I don’t know that she herself has ever talked about an age gap or specifically mentioned older men?

Another thing that I have been seeing alot of are comments like darkling/darklina fans only like him because he is hot. What bothers me about this is firstly even if that were true and the only reason people liked him was because he is hot, so what? There’s nothing wrong with that, its fiction and fiction is used to escape for a bit, its for enjoyment and entertainment, so if that enjoyment and entertainment comes in the form of staring at the hot guy irregardless of whether they are the hero or villain, let them be. Why are you criticising the way someone enjoys fiction? Sometimes a gal just wants to look at the hot guy. Secondly its just a really irrelevant argument because the darkling is not the only hot, charismatic character in the books or show. M*l is also described as being attractive and charismatic with no shortage of friends and girls, Nikolai is another character that fits that description, so by this argument the only reason M*l fans like him is because he is hot, and the only reason Nikolai fans like him is because he is hot. Thirdly its just plainly not true, whilst I am sure there may be some fans who only like him because he is hot, again nothing wrong with that, most fans like him for a variety of different reasons because he is an interesting and complicated character. As someone who spends a fair bit of time in the darkling/darklina tags the most common reason I have seen for fans liking him is because of his dedication to the grisha, his willingness to fight for the grisha something that he has dedicated 100′s of years of his life too. Personally I like Aleksander/the darkling because he has a sympathetic backstory, because he is fighting for the grisha and when seeing that they had no place to go where they could be free from fear he vowed to make them a safe place, a sanctuary, of course I am going to root for that goal too. I like him because he is complicated and complex and despite being an immortal being who has become deeply effected by past traumas there is still something beautifully human about him, particularly in the show. I also like the connection he has with Alina, the whole yin/yang of it and them being each others balance. I love the complexity and angst of them having this deep connection and pull to each other but also having this anger and sense of betrayal, how they have to try and navigate around having different points of view and seeing the world in a different ways, it makes for a very compelling story and their chemistry in the show is electric. The fact that he is hot is merely a bonus, but even if he wasn’t a conventionally attractive person I would still like his character because of those complexities, because of that connection he has with Alina. But one thing this rant has done is make me curious as to what my other fellow darkling/darklina fans like about the darkling? What drew you to the character? Anyway that’s enough ranting for one day, again my apologies, I am going to go and rewatch season 1 of shadow and bone in preparation for season 2′s release tomorrow...sheepishly shuffles off my soapbox, waving awkwardly.

#darklina #the darkling #anti leigh bardugo

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aleksanderscult · 1 month

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so. First of all I love your blog. Seriously I think you are one of the person who have comman sense in this fandom. I like everything you post. While scrolling through Tumblr I came across the usual anti darkling post ( he is groomer , murderer etc etc ) i did the thing I usually do when I came across such thing : I skip. A tag caught my eye. I don't remember but it's say something like : the only reason you like him is that he is Ben Barnes if darkling is a girl you couldn't like him. Which made me think what if darkling was a girl and alina as a boy. I just image a sexy hot black hair women with pale skin and grey eyes and morozova genes. Which..........is enough to made me think if I am a Bi 🤔. That image has not left me for a week and my dreams. So my question is

What do you think might happen if darkling is a girl and alina is a boy. How might the events of SaB and SaS will be affected. And m*lina too,of mal is a girl too. You thoughts 🤔

Thank you so much, anon! It makes me happy to know that others enjoy my blog and content. 😍

First of all about what that anti said: I personally didn't like Ben Barnes as the Darkling so it obviously doesn't apply. And even if the Darkling was a girl I would still root for her. I root for any character that fights for something better, for a positive change to happen among such oppression. And I think that's one of the major reasons his fans love him as well.

Now about your question: Boy, I would love to see that. I was always attracted to dangerous women, especially the ones that combine beauty and slyness (like Milady in "The Musketeers" or Morgana from "Merlin" post season 2).

But I don't think the story would be affected that much with the only exception that Alina in a male form would probably not be slut shamed for his attraction to the Darkling (in this version she would be called Aleksandra which is a fact that I love!)

The Darkling would remain an interesting character but, God, does that mean that Alina as a man would still avoid his duties?? 😭

And Mal as a girl. She would obviously be popular and well-liked by everyone but imagine that: she would sleep around with many guys and then attack her best friend for falling in love with a girl that isn't her. Well, for one thing it doesn't stick. You see if Mal as a girl fucked around then she would be called a whore (just like Alina was indirectly called one by Mal for wanting Aleksander) while in the original story when Mal did that no one raised a single eyebrow. So we live in a fictional world where if you do that as a guy then you're okay but if you're a girl then you should be called a prostitute. And Leigh had Mal get away with his behavior so she was more willing to let Mal pass with his sexist behavior than the Darkling who had enough and tried to put end to his people slaughter for good.

Anyway, I believe Mal's character would change a lot if he was a girl (primarily his fuckboy nature because the author doesn't allow a girl to have sexual liberation in her books) and I have a feeling she would be boring (again). And I don't think she would be a tracker?

Alina as a man wouldn't be slut shamed (because he's a man 🤷) but he would still avoid the Darkling. Nevertheless the chemistry would be off the charts. And the Darkling would slay like always. She would be the personification of femme fatale but her goal would be selfless and true like always. For some reason, I imagine her as a very seductive figure (although my wishful thinking might be speaking here).

The real question here is how the relationship between the Darkling as a girl and her mother, Baghra would be. Would Baghra want a daughter in the first place but she got stuck with Aleksandra because it was her only child that shared her powers? Or if Baghra had no problem with her child's sex, would she still be that possessive and controlling over her?

My own answer is yes and Baghra would most definitely leave a trauma to the Darkling even if she was a girl. That woman has no parenting skills in any universe. Just like I can't see the Darkling be anything else other than a fighter and a survivor in any other scenario.

#you see TGT contains some very specific sexist views #if the roles were reversed (the Darkling was a woman. Alina a man and Mal a woman) then things would be complicated #People wouldn't even accuse Alina that she had a thing for the Darkling. They would just call the latter “a manipulative selfish bitch”#anon asks #lovely asks #grishaverse #AU #shadow and bone #the darkling #alina starkov #anti mal oretsev #pro darkling #aleksander morozova #pro aleksander morozova #grishaverse trilogy #pro darklina

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greensaplinggrace · 4 months

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it is just calling out misogyny. calling baghra abusive and not darkling because you want to fuck him.

i imagine this is about this post, in which case i want to be very clear here about a great many things. first of all, you are factually incorrect, and misconstruing the situation. it is not just calling out misogyny, because there would have to be misogyny occurring in the first place. which there was not.

second of all, i want to go over what exactly you did that fundamentally undermined your argument. what you were doing in that post is called a red herring. it is the act - in a debate or intellectual discussion - of diverting focus away from the original topic with an irrelevant one. what you are bringing to the table is a bias; it is the misconception that one must always be discussing what you believe is the more serious topic when addressing other issues - and it is the equivalent of, say, bringing up men's rights on posts about feminism.

to argue that there is a double standard occurring, one would have to have sufficient evidence that the template used to judge one side is being completely discarded or changed when judging the other. in that case, the biggest argument to be made in this fandom about double standards is the double standard of watering down the female loyalists while holding the male revolutionary accountable to an entirely radical degree.

but that's beside the point. because the post referenced didn't come close to showing any type of double standard in any direction.

now, i want to be very clear here: a woman being brought up or critiqued in any space does not equate an automatic attempt at misogyny. that one cannot discuss a woman's complete actions without also - by social consensus - bringing up a man to divert attention away from her, is more damaging in that regard than the initial discussion about the woman to begin with.

as such, what you are also bringing to the table is another bias - an assumption. that anyone critiquing a woman when there is a man right beside her is automatically ignoring his crimes. and not only that, but they are ignoring his crimes due to sexual intent.

this assumption often arises if one believes their own worldview is superior to anyone else's. and if one ignores how the delineation of focus and critique in fandom spaces operates. furthermore, this is rooted in the belief that moral pandering must be done at all times to remain acceptable in social (fandom, in this case) spaces. which i have already mentioned before as being incredibly harmful and engaging in a black and white worldview that simply does not comport with reality. people do not operate in boxes, and they do not need to give all of their focus all of the time to the things you have issues with. if they are so pressing to you, you should discuss them yourself.

in fact, this brings me to a recent post i made about cross-tagging, which seems strangely relevant to the way you and many others operate within fandom - and believe others should operate as well. and that is this: there is an obscene amount of inflammatory hate posts cross-tagged with irrelevant topics. they're always tagged with the groups or fandom spaces assumed to be similarly minded just because the media or character they engage with are more acceptable and "pure".

i've seen anti darkling posts tagged with genyalina. completely unrelated in any capacity to the subject of the main post. i've seen even more hate posts tagged with six of crows, when their only subject matter was shadow and bone. do you know why this is? it's because these people (when they are not simply trying to attract attention) believe wholeheartedly that their views on morality are homogenous with the whole, and that if one hates this amoral character in the ways they do, they must also like the morally acceptable things as well, and condemn others similarly. it is an automatic slide into 'us vs them' based on a shared impression of ethical ideology.

this is how people with little real capacity to decipher nuance end up getting their wires crossed about the complexity of literary discussion and personal interest in fandom. and how this somehow correlates to one's inherent goodness.

which is the long way of saying that a person does not have to raise every other issue when discussing one subject. they do not have to always mention the darkling when they talk about baghra - and they do not have to (as i am well acquainted with this fandom's obsession with female purity and gender essentialism) automatically support every female character spat out of those books just to make the people incapable of media comprehension and basic critical analysis feel better. they are not beholden to you, or your egocentric worldview of a homogenous social sphere. you are not the authority on operating in fandom spaces, and you are not - believe it or not - the authority on acceptable behavior in fandom spaces.

#sorry but there's more of a double standard in people praising baghra for the things the darkling does #than the other way around #sorry :/#grishaverse #shadow and bone #fandomcourse #negative #baghra morozova #the darkling #aleksander morozova #asks and answers #anon #weird fucking people lmfao #like maybe go read a book or something idk #abuse mention tw #sab discourse #darkling slander sunday

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lexxierave · 4 months

Text

I Don't Need You Part 2

Part 1

“You men come with me there are some things which we must discuss.” The King said after he spoke with his daughter.

Fedyor nudged General Kirigan to gain his attention away from the princess that he seemed to be intently studying. It didn’t pass by the heartrender that after the King arrived the girl had changed her attitude about leaving but what he didn’t get was why the General seemed more intrigued by her now than before. He remembers when they first received word of this mission.

“Mon sovereign, we have received a letter from the Grand Palace,” Ivan stated walking in with Fedyor to the Darkling’s war room.

Their general was sitting on the table in the middle of the room caught in an intimate moment with the sun summoner. He had asked not to be disturbed unless it was of the utmost importance and Fedyor could tell a letter didn’t seem like it was under those lines. Still, when Genya had returned to the Little Place, she carried this letter with her and in a rushed tone instructed the two to give this to the general at once by order of the king.

When General Kirigan noted the look Ivan gave him and sighed in agitation before turning to Alina, “I’m sorry but we’ll have to continue our chat later.” He told her taking her hand in his and caressing it.

The sun summoner’s face instantly flashed red before she nodded and turned to leave, “I look forward to our next talk.” She walked out of the room.

The Darkling nodded to Feydor and Iven to shut the doors while he opened the letter and peered at its contents.

“What does it say mon sovereignty?” Fedyor asked after a long silence.

“Fetch the horses. We ride out tonight to West Ravka.” He ordered suddenly causing the heartrender to jump a little bit.

Both Ivan and Fedyor agree and leave their general to his thoughts about whatever that letter says.

It wasn’t until they were away from the Little Palace that he told them about their new mission. To retrieve a princess who was not only supposed to be the guest of honor, but Prince Vastly’s betrothed.

Now they are in Os Kervo meeting with their king in private about why they escort her so early to the Grand Palace.

“Here we are.” The King states as he has his guards open the doors in front of them to a grand room filled with gold or jewels.

“Welcome to my treasure room gentlemen. The safest room in the kingdom.” He informs them as he takes a seat in the only chair in the room.

“What about that of the princess?” Kirigan asks, after all was there not a guard placed outside your bedroom door.

“Merely formality. After the attempt to kidnap her? We had to make it look like we upped her protection. At least until the ball but I see old Pyotr had other plans. Sending in his Grisha to make me look like a fool. But so be it, so long as this marriage goes as planned I could carless where she stays. I just want what was agreed upon by your tsar” He remarked.

“And what was that?” Aleksander questioned with an eerily calm composure. Something about this touched a small nerve in the Darkling. It reminded him of how his Grisha were treated as if they were someone else’s property and not people.

“Gold, of course.” He chuckled tossing some nearby coins at their feet. “Now you have your orders. See to it she gets to the Grand Palace in one piece and marries that prince of your general and I’ll pay you handsomely.”

Aleksander could do nothing more than nod. Though this treatment bothered him, it had nothing to do with his overall plans and nothing to do with his Grisha. So, like the good soldier he was he agreed to the terms.

Part 3

Tag list:

@drinix

#general kirigan x reader #aleksander morozova x reader #ben barnes #general kirigan #aleksander morozova #shadow and bone #the darkling x reader #the darkling #i don't need you #aleksander morovoza x princess

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grishaverse-chaos · 2 months

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The Darkling

why I like them: could have been SO GOOD in theory okay? I will never shut up about this because "character who everyone thinks is evil is actually just the victim of a smear campaign and some really bigoted propaganda" is SUCH a good character concept and I wish darkling fans were right about him because it would be so fucking cool and aesthetic

why I don't: he uh. he isn't that. he could have been so fucking iconic and instead he was just a vicious murderer. who grooms teenage girls.

favourite episode/scene: LOVE the bit where alina stabs his hand in s1e8. tbf that's more of a fav alina moment than anything else lmao, let me think... okay fr I love the "fine. make me your villain" scene bc it just really showcases who he is as a character and how he sees himself (hint: those two things are not the same)

favourite season/movie: imo he's better written in s1 of the show than in s2, idk though. and I do love his story in the kos duology lmao

favourite line: that one bit in rule of wolves where he says "everything I have done has been for ravka" because it's so clearly Not True and yet.... he clearly thinks it is.... so where does intent stop and impact begin...... it's deep okay

favourite outfit: purely for shits and giggles I'm going to say his black kefta in s2 where there's bits of gold bc I loveeee people being haunted by those they've wronged and I think alina haunting him really fits into that theme

otp: no thank you! in all honesty he prob could have been Fixed™ if he'd had a genuine relationship at an earlier age but he didn't so I refuse to inflict him on any other character. darkolai is interesting to consider though bc I feel like the ways they see themselves clash so heavily.... it's about self image and it's about villainy and law and justice and power and and and. they would Not be a good relationship but I think they should interact more for the Narrative

brotp: his sister ulla! they'd have such a fun sibling dynamic lmao I think it'd be sweet

headcanon: tbh I don't tend to think about him much beyond the big narrative stuff so I'm struggling to think of something that fits the genre of "headcanon".... but let's humanise him a little! I bet he reads really literary fiction and gets ever-so-slightly pretentious about it lmao

unpopular opinion: is it unpopular to say that despite his original good intentions he's a bit of a dickhead and not as smart as he thinks he is? in some corners of the fandom it totally is but idk

a wish: at this point there's not much more that could be done with his character beyond what's already been set up (him being mercy killed so he's not suffering in the thorn wood for all eternity) so I'm going to say that I hope his stans get better reading comprehension bc dear GOD some of the takes I see (posted in the alina tag btw I'm not deliberately seeking them out) are absolutely horrendous. is that too salty? perhaps. idc though it's my blog and darkling stans are free to block me if they don't like my takes

an oh-god-please-don't-ever-happen: I swear if he goes NEAR alina genya or zoya again I will reach through the fourth wall to kill him myself. only half joking btw I'd be so pissed. imo they've all had the closure they need narratively and for him to seek them out again would be a dick move of the highest degree

5 words to best describe them: used to have good intentions. that might be cheating but idk if I can pick 5 random adjectives lmao

my nickname for them: I call him darkles sometimes (bc it's funny and also I think it'd piss him off if people called him that in-universe) also a lot of less positive nicknames ("that prick", "shithead" etc) but idk if that counts

#anyways sorry this took FOREVER it's been sitting in my drafts for weeks #but this was fun to think about! he's not my fav character as a person but holy shit is he interesting to analyse #anti darkling #<- just to be on the safe side #mayhem.txt #answered

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mihrsuri · 1 month

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unpublished fics game

I got this from @nocompromise-noregrets - thank you friend <3333. I’ve been having a ‘this is cliche, annoying, bad writing and not historically accurate/worse than philippa gregory’ brain crisis so I’m hoping to maybe get my brain started by talking about. So I thought I’d divide into categories.

Really Just Ideas/Outlines At Best

TWW Poly AU - the scandal isn’t the MS (they disclosed that) the ‘scandal’ is the Jed/Abbey/Leo relationship

TWW Ballet AU

The Roger/Chioke ‘worst recognises worst but Roger is absolutely playing him like a master musician’

The Plantaganet OT4 AU

The Multifandom Sex Slave AU (set in sort of fantasy Rome)

Persian Jewish Sara Crewe

Robert Dudley Travels Back In Time

TWW characters + trauma survivors

TWW Hunger Games: Abby’s Games

Multifandom Sex Slavery AU

Specific Tudors OT3 Verse Ones (That Are Just Ideas)

Helen Norwich

Dance Rehearsal

Tudors OT3 Verse Ships + Taylor Swift

English Civil War

The Crows Have Cameos

The Big Ones (that actually have stuff published)

Grishaverse Hunger Games: I wrote summaries of all the characters journeys and I wanted to go into detail - I have Jespers and I’m working on Kaz right now (he is very difficult to get talking). It’s taking the fact that the Crows and My Favourites From Shadow And Bone know each other and became friends and made me think - all these different Victors coming together to become family and also take down some fuckers (mostly Darkles)

Rewrite The Stars 2.0: I’m rewriting the first Tudors OT3 verse fic because it was only meant as a one shot and I have so so much more world building and ideas to write. I’m just stuck right now because (see above). It’s a fairy tale with a happy ending but it has a fight, it has pain and it has scars that will remain heavy but also, there will be love.

In another world this is how it might have gone between the three of them. The story of how the love between three extraordinary people change the world for the better and made it the kindest. The story of a fight for a fairytale

Crown Of Ashes:

Crown of Ashes is very inspired by the Taylor Swift Song Castle Crumbling. It’s a ‘what if Mary Tudor made similar choices to her father’ for better (and worse and maybe in between) reasons to her. What if everything the world tells you you should believe and want is wrong actually - what if you get everything you thought you wanted and it sucks.

This one. I know where I want to go, I’m just Not Getting There. I think I need to listen to the playlist again.

Tortall Found Family: Essentially this is about Numair/Arram coming to Tortall, heavy on the Jon-Thayet-Numair friendship but everyone is here, my absolute conviction that Ozorne never stopped loving Numair throughout all the books, that Roger had a really creepy possessive thing for Jon and also BONDING. Also contains Biracial Jon of Conte content (I think).

I’m going to quote from @nocompromise-noregrets here: Do please ask me about any that catch your eye, I am in dire need of talking about them, and it might just kickstart the muses…I do need interaction to spark the ideas, it turns out, I'm not great at this in isolation.

Tagging (if you want to obviously): @boleynqueenes @boleynecklace @theladyelizabeth @jackironsides @emilykaldwen @miabicicletta @unseenacademic @sherwoodknights @corporalicent @dr-dendritic-trees @endoftheworldhere @cinemaocd

#meme #lil and her ridiculous aus #ot3: political power trio

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padfootagain · 10 months

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Hello everyone! It’s still hard to believe that I’ve hit 6k followers this month! I can’t believe there are so many of you interested in my silly little stories!!

In order to celebrate, I’ve asked you what kind of event you wanted, and you’ve voted for the tropes/AU event! So, here we go! I’m going to use the same prompts as a previous event, as I prepared a pretty thorough prompt list already.

I hope you have fun during this event!

Carole, what is all this new mess now?

The idea is simple: you can make a request for a character I write for (the list of characters is under the cut) by choosing a prompt in the lists that are (also) under the cut. You can add specific details if you have a more precise idea (but please, remember that I do not write nsfw content). In the coming weeks, I’ll write all your requests! I will accept a maximum of 15 requests, or as many requests as I will have received in the next 72 hours, depending on how many requests are submitted! The requests for this event will thus be open between today (August 14 2023) and Thursday (August 17 2023).

How can we request a fic?

You can request a fic by sending me a message through my inbox. I will not accept requests sent through private messages because it is very difficult for me to keep track of them that way. You can, however, request a fic on or off anon. So, if you’re a little shy, don’t hesitate to send me an anonymous ask!

You must choose a character in the list under the cut, for whom I will write a one-shot using the prompt you have chosen (the list is also under the cut). You can write down only the letter/number corresponding to the prompt you’ve chosen instead of copying them in full if it’s easier for you. You can choose an AU or a trope or an AU and a trope. You can also add whether you would prefer some fluff, angst or hurt/comfort.

You can include additional details if you have a specific idea and want to see it included in the fic ; however, I can reject a request if I don’t feel comfortable with the details you’ve added.

Your request must thus include :

A character from the list below

A prompt from the list below

The combinations for the prompts can be :

An AU only

A trope only

An AU + a trope

For example, you can request :

Caspian, modern AU

OR Caspian, Friends to lovers

OR Caspian, modern AU, Friends to lovers

If you have any questions regarding the event, don’t hesitate to ask me! Also, a little nice word in the request is always nice, don’t forget to at least say ‘hi’ :)

I hope you have fun with this event! I can’t wait to see the combinations you will choose!

Thank you all for your support! Have a lovely day! :)

Characters :

Ben Barnes

Caspian

Ryan Brenner

Logan Delos

Sam Adams (Ben Barnes’s character)

The Darkling

Sirius Black

Blackinnon

Wolfstar

Remus Lupin

Jily

Poe Dameron

Cassian Andor

Jyn Erso

Obi-Wan Kenobi

Ahsoka Tano

AUs :

Modern AU

Florist/ tattoo artist AU

Soulmates AU

Neighbours AU

Roommates AU

Historical AU

Professor AU

Bookshop or library AU

Bodyguard AU

Coffeeshop AU

College AU

Painter or artist AU

Royalty AU

Coworkers AU

Parents AU

Tropes :

Only one bed

Road trip

Caught in a snowstorm

Friends to lovers

Mutual pinning

Enemies to lovers

Idiots in love

Angry love confession

Established relationship

Drunken confession

Wounded character leads to confession

Rivals to lovers

Fake dating

Secret dating

Arranged marriage

Domestic bliss

Jealousy angst with a happy ending

Poorly-timed confession

Friends with benefits to lovers

Forbidden love

Highly romantic dance scene

Oh… oh no…

Wrong time to right time

"I'm not good enough for you."

Miscommunication

Heard the confession spoken when the other thought they were asleep

Arranged date

Almost kissing

Kissing under the rain

"Please, don't leave…"

******************************

Tagging a few people who might be interested (aka people in the taglist...) : @wolfbrideinhiding @sergeantbuckybarnes @wolfmoonmusic @reg-arcturus-black @idek-what-to-put @kpicard @rhapsodyonthethames @intothesoul @pat-sirius @rockintensse @budugu @sayumiht @hells-escapees @omgrachwrites @cloudbroomblog

#6k event #6k followers event #event #prompts #writing prompts #tropes and AUs #6k followers

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mcgnagallsarmy · 1 year

Note

Hi! I'm new to Spuffy and I was wondering, are there any "big" fics that you would recommend? Like the fics that most people have read/heard about, if that makes sense lol😅

Hi, anon!

Well, I only started reading Spuffy fanfic a couple of years ago, so maybe I don't consider the same fics as classics as most people do, hope my recommendations will work for you anyway (:

*if you're looking for more Spuffy stories, check out my ficrec tag!

These are my top 5 favourite OLD fics:

Found by CupcakeCute [PG-13]

Begins between TGIQ and Power Play, continues post-NFA. Buffy learns of Spike's resurrection from an unlikely source and immediately sets out to make things right as The Apocalypse breaks out in L.A. Spike/Buffy pairing, some Angel/Cordelia.

My Life Closed Twice by anaross [R]

Post-Not Fade Away. Buffy seeks Spike's remains, but then finds him in the most unusal place.

The Other Side of Midnight by Holly [NC-17]

In the months following the destruction of Sunnydale, Buffy cuts herself off from her friends and resumes life the only way she knows how: fighting evil. It’s only a matter of time before her past catches up with her, and brings about the man she lost and loved too late…only he doesn’t recognize her face.

Promise of Frost by Eurydice [NC-17]

When a snowstorm strands Buffy and Spike, they are forced to turn to each other for strength, especially when a missing Giles, mysterious visitors, and way too much magic threatens to turn it into a not so very merry Christmas. Set mid-S4.

The Writing on the Wall by Holly [NC-17]

There was no body to bury. There was no funeral. There was nothing but the three rules and the knowledge that a thousand years of torment was nothing compared to a world without her in it. Spike embarks on a journey through the Gates of Hell to rescue the one he loves, but in order to save her, he must risk losing himself.

And these are my top 5 favourite LONG fics:

A Different Kind of Hell by OffYourBird [NC-17]

Jumping through Glory's tower portal, Buffy and Spike find themselves in a hell dimension they never expected. One that looks suspiciously like 1880's London. Will they find a way back home? Will the truth behind William the Bloody at last make itself known? Will Buffy ever stop butchering the Queen's English? Join them and find out. Starts off at the end of "The Gift."

The Darkling by OffYourBird [NC-17]

When Buffy’s quest to get Spike returned to her is fulfilled in an unexpected way, she finds herself in a complicated relationship with an intrigued master vampire who isn’t the man she loves, but who might be someday… if she can convince him to step out of the dark.

Hunger by Sunalso [NC-17]

AU. Spike killed his third Slayer, but Dru was already dust. He's been lost, but when his supper turns out to be more than he bargained for, it leaves him hungry for something else instead. And Buffy? She's just hungry.

Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow by Sunalso [Adult Only]

Buffy has fallen into darkness and been forced to become a ghost in her own past. Only she didn't come back alone. What will it take to overcome depression, obsession, and death so that she can learn to live, love, and laugh again.

West of the Moon, East of the Sun by KnifeEdge [NC-17]

I keep having the strangest dream. Every night it's the same thing: a dark room, a big bed, and a silent vampire that I can feel, but not see. I'd be wigged, except it's just a dream, right? It'll be a cold day in hell before I ever willingly sleep with a vampire again…

#spuffy #ficrec #reply #anonymous

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she-posts-nerdy-stuff · 2 days

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Don't Go Blindly Into the Dark

Summary:

To hide that he can't read, Jan Van Eck has been forcing his son to pretend he's blind since he was eight years old. Wylan is now attending Ketterdam University, and meeting Jesper Fahey may very well be about to change his life. But is he safe to tell Jesper the truth? And what will Jesper say if he does?

Jesper is struggling to weigh up his life in the Barrel and his life at the University of Ketterdam, and there's a good chance that his growing debt is about to make the decision for him. He hasn't attended class consecutively for months, but maybe that will change when his newest project includes partnering up with Wylan Van Eck. But can he really leave the Barrel behind him? And how long can he keep up the pretence of who he thinks Wylan wants him to be?

Tags: @justalunaticfangirl @lunarthecorvus

If anyone else would like to be tagged let me know :)

Content warnings for this chapter: death, descriptions dead bodies, blood and wounds, gore, violence, murder, implied sa references, trafficking references

AO3 link

Note: I only freaking went and did it again *facepalm* Sorry, I once again updated on ao3 and left the tumblr post completely written and open on my laptop without actually posting it - but at least this time it's only been a few hours instead of an entire day haha. Love to y'all, thanks so much for reading <3

Chapter 31 - Kaz

“Kaz-”

Kaz looked up from his office door, his gloved hand half closed over the handle, to see Jesper working his way across the room towards him. He sighed and shifted his weight against his cane, leaning heavily against it as he waited for Jesper. The weather had begun to clear up after the storm but the air was still damp and clingy, and his leg never liked the wet or the cold. Convenient, for Ketterdam.

“I just spoke to Layla,” said Jesper, as he reached him, “About that girl from the Sweet Shoppe-”

“Inside,” Kaz nodded to his office door.

Jesper faltered slightly, but followed him in and pushed the door shut as Kaz sat down behind his desk. He stretched his bad leg out in front of him.

“I’ve seen her,”

“Layla?” asked Jesper, frowning, “I thought she said-”

“Amethyst,” said Kaz, “I saw her,”

It hadn’t been pretty. Jesper grimaced, leaning back ever so slightly in the chair he’d taken up.

“You mean…” he gestured vaguely up and down his own face, as though miming the place Amethyst had been cut through.

Kaz nodded.

He’d been to the Exchange just before their job this evening was supposed to start, only there to remind someone what he knew so that they’d agree to update him on which guards would be working over the coming nights. It wasn’t for a while that he’d be needing the information, but they might get ideas of lying to him and if they did then he needed to make sure they knew what would happen to them. He also couldn't afford for the night they chose to be the night he needed to know, so the work would have to begin in advance. Finding Amethyst spilling her innards down the steps had been unexpected - and unwelcome. Kaz hadn’t been prepared.

“Perfectly,” he added, watching the grim look on Jesper’s face deepen, “Straight in half,”

“Some Grisha can do that, can’t they? They say the Darkling could,”

Kaz shook his head.

“A weapon specific to very powerful Etherealki, I believe. No frightened runaway in the middle of Ketterdam could have done that, or at least not anyone who’s been flying under the radar for long - and anyway, I don’t think the Cut’s precise enough for two equal halves. I’ve heard some stories,”

Nina had an unnerving habit of dropping such things, things she’d witnessed as a child during the Ravkan Civil War, into casual conversation and being surprised when people were taken aback, but Kaz had heard of it from a couple of others as well. As far as he could tell, the Cut would have been even messier than what he’d seen today.

“So then, what?”

“I have no idea,”

There was a brief pause, before Jesper ventured.

“Do you think it’s the same person? Tara - she’s the girl from the Menagerie - Tara and Amethyst, do you think-?”

“I don’t think,” Kaz sighed, “I’m certain. The patterns are far too similar, the murders far too close together, the mode of operation is exactly the same - except the death itself,”

And was there to that? Everyone, Kaz included, had thought that the Leopard, Tara, had been strangled; the bruises around her neck were heavy, inkblots on her too pale skin, and her body was otherwise unmaimed but for scars and the remnants of old injuries. But bruises could have been placed there, couldn’t they, by a Corporalnik? Though Kaz couldn’t imagine any possible motivation for that. None of this seemed to quite make sense.

“The question is whether they have real motive or if this is just mindless killing - and the answer is that mindless killing, even in the Barrel, is much rarer than people think. In any case it doesn’t get this much attention. Mindless killing is messy, its random - mindless killing is corpses with no connection to each other, usually lower effort, sometimes a more fleeting motivation fulfilled and the victim killed in the aftermath. Mindless killing isn’t premeditated, it doesn’t involve such long-term kidnappings - remember both had been missing for at least a week, Tara for two, but those bodies were fresh. When Tara was first found, maybe we could have struck that up to mindless. The seeming randomness of it, the returning her to the Menagerie, even the method; all of it could have just been Tara’s very bad luck. But looking at it all together…” Kaz shook his head, “You know a girl from West Stave died in a similar pattern last month? From a smaller house, didn’t get much notice; I didn’t start to connect the dots until Tara, but when Amethyst went missing I knew. Something’s happening here, and if something’s happening then someone’s making it happen with intention and with motive. These are setups, and there’s somebody pulling the strings behind them,”

Jesper fidgeted a little, and Kaz saw his hands drift towards his gun belt. He’d swapped his prize revolvers, still sitting in Kaz’s safe, for two sad little lumps of pistols and apparently they weren’t giving him the comfort that his own guns usually did. He always laid hands on them when he was antsy, like a child seeking the comfort of a favoured doll, and now his fingers were dancing over the replacements like they couldn’t quite decide where to land.

Kaz flexed his gloved fingers and gripped his cane tighter. He could have given Jesper his revolvers back, the safe was right behind him, but he didn’t move. Jesper hadn’t asked for them, he knew the deal was incomplete, and Kaz could admit to himself that part of him wanted to punish Jesper a little. He owed the sharpshooter nothing, and if Jesper hadn’t left her behind then maybe the Wraith wouldn’t have been injured. Kaz may not have lost money on the proposed deal with Wylan, but Jesper’s proposition had cost Inej something more. And it was costing Kaz the loss of her skills these past few weeks, leaving him in the dark on details she could have gathered for him. He was well within his rights to keep the guns, by the deal they’d made at least, but he knew that if Jesper asked for them he would hand them over. But Jesper hadn’t asked, so they continued to gather dust in Kaz’s locked office.

“Who died last month?” asked Jesper, a little quieter than before.

Kaz shrugged.

“I don’t have a name, but the point is that whatever’s happening here is building up. The first didn’t get attention, the second wasn’t atypical of West Stave it was just showier. But Amethyst? This is new,”

Kaz suppressed a shudder at the thought - he’d never seen a body like that before. Amethyst had been splayed over the steps outside the Exchange, stripped bare, leaking blood onto the stones. Her entire body had been sliced in two, from head to foot, and the open flap of her chest cavity spilled structures Kaz probably couldn’t even name free from the cage of her ribs and flesh and skin. His eyes skirted quickly to her face. It was impressive they’d managed to identify her, he thought, and then a minute later realised that they hadn’t needed to. Her face was smashed and blood-soaked and split into two equal halves, but the dismemberment had left her arms untouched. The Sweet Shoppe tattoo, dancing on her skin in time with the mist.

Kaz swallowed tightly, stiffening his hand on his cane and readjusting his bad leg. There were more stadwatch on their way, in fact it was surprising the entire place wasn’t crawling with them yet, and Kaz didn’t fancy being the only person around the corpse when they arrived. He didn’t want to look at it any longer, everything in him was screaming to turn and run, but Kaz’s feet would not move. Amethyst’s bulging eyes stared up at him from their unnatural distance apart, and even standing there he could feel the cold skin, taut over bloating flesh, wet beneath his palms.

“Kaz?”

Kaz snapped back to the present, gaze fixing on Jesper and forcibly anchoring him in the room. He felt an unfair rage fizzing straight through him, crackling down his arms and all the way into his fingertips.

“This is new,” Jesper prompted, “What…?”

“I don’t know what kind of weapon could do that to a person,” Kaz shook his head, “And I don’t know why someone wanted to kill Amethyst, or the others. But I know they had a reason,”

It probably wasn’t anything to do with the girls themselves. At the end of the day they were easy targets, weren’t they? Heleen and Pekka may even have had some money slipped to them under the table, Kaz wasn’t sure he’d be surprised. Though maybe not, or they might have done a better job of keeping the original disappearances under wraps. It didn’t matter. Kaz didn’t think that Tara and Amethyst, or the other girl, had been chosen individually for who they were. They’d been chosen because they would get no more attention than Barrel gossip, and because no-one was going to expect the stadwatch to solve the murder of an indenture from West Stave. Kaz doubted the first victim had even been reported to them. Who would have said anything? He just didn’t understand what they’d been chosen for. If they’d all been killed like Amethyst was, he’d assume someone was testing some kind of new weapon. But something didn’t add up here, and it was putting Kaz on edge.

“They’ll do it again,”

It wasn’t a question but Kaz nodded anyway, and Jesper leaned back as he drummed his fingers against his knees. Again Kaz thought he might ask to have his revolvers back, but he said nothing.

“They’re getting braver,” Kaz mused, “Who says this only started last month?”

And what comes next?

There was a long silence.

“You were late,”

“I was setting up a sling for Inej,” said Jesper, readjusting on his seat, “And I had to wait for Anika so there was someone to stay with her,”

“How is she?”

“Restless. In pain. Improving,” Jesper shrugged, “You might know better for yourself if you spoke to her,”

Kaz didn’t bother to dignify that with a response. He hadn’t spoken to Inej since she woke up in his office a few days ago. Her sudden panic at waking up in a room she only had hazy memories of dragging herself to through the clouds of pain that were clinging to her, lying on the floor, wearing someone else’s clothes, had been palpable in the air even before she’d scrambled away from him across the boards. As soon as she moved her face contorted in pain and she shuddered to a halt, pulling her arms into herself and pressing into the cupboards behind her as she shook herself properly awake and her dark eyes found Kaz’s.

“Don’t try to walk until you’re ready,” he told her, “Nina’s outside, she’ll take you back to the Slat,”

Inej watched him for a moment, shaky breaths filling the air between them. Kaz stood slowly and began to walk towards the door, wary of Inej’s eyes on him.

“The body’s been moved,” he said, feeling something soften in his voice whether he wanted it to or not, “If you’d rather swap to a different room maybe I can-”

“It’s okay,” she whispered, and he couldn’t help but turn to see her, “Thank you,”

Kaz’s heart was in his throat and Inej’s eyes were wide and dark enough to drown in.

“I’ll get Nina,”

It was all he could bring himself to say.

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crowsoundsonly · 6 months

Text

rachel's "i'm on winter break and have time to write" sleepover !!

hi everyone !! i am so excited to actually have time to sit down and write without university looming over me like storm clouds. there won't be a lot of rules, just a lot of fics and fun.

a few things to know:

send requests !!

no limit on asks or prompts requested !! i'm taking requests through jan 31, 2024.

if you have an original idea, send it my way !! it doesn't have to be from the prompt list.

if you want to join, please do !! write something !! tag me !!

i don't write super explicit smut. but i will def write some light smut and kissing and whatnot if requested.

no dub/con, no incest, no ultra-kinky stuff. sorry guys.

people i write for...

bucky barnes

ben barnes characters (the darkling, billy russo, caspian)

loki

will graham (hannibal)

cillian murphy characters (thomas shelby, jonathan crane, robert fischer)

tangerine (bullet train)

bruce wayne

geralt of rivia (the witcher)

prompts:

plot:

1. touch starved 2. hurt/comfort 3. holding onto the other’s shoulders for support 4. putting a hand over the other’s mouth to shut them up 5. showing up at each other’s house late at night 6. washing the other’s body 7. kissing their bruises and scars 8. sitting close and knees touching 9. meeting the family 10. teaching the other to… 11. watching the other when they are in their element 12. comfort kisses, goodbye kisses, first kisses, etc. 13. oral fixation 14. hand fetish

quotes:

1. "You know you’re pretty much the worst. In the best way possible." 2. "You smell good." 3. "You said I love you too fast." 4. "You were not supposed to find out about it." 5. "How long has it been since someone touched you like this?" 6. "Even if you don’t feel the same… I just wanted to tell you." 7. "Can you stay with me?"/"Don't go. Please." 8. "I say I’m over it but I still imagine it’s his hands in my hair when I’m alone.” 9. "I'm anything you want me to be." 10. "How can you be so smart, yet so stupid?" 11. "You’re dead to me." 12. "I thought it was just a silly crush, but it turned into more. I’m sorry, I know you don’t feel the same about me." 13. "Why are you staring at me?" 14. "I never thought this would happen." 15. "I am a god." 16. "Where did you go?" 17. "You were in my dream last night." 18. "Please don’t look (at me)…" 19. "I know I should be happy with friendship. So is it wrong of me to not be satisfied?" 20. "Stop worrying." 21. "So you've fantasized about me?" 22. "Why are you unbuttoning your pants?" 23. "You're shivering."

au’s:

1. babysitter 2. soulmates 3. flower/coffee/book shop 4. time travel 5. neighbors 6. coworkers 7. teachers 8. royalty 9. historical 10. fairytale 11. wedding 12. fake dating

happy asking and happy holidays ! - rachel

my masterlist :)

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rose-sophia-isabella-rogers · 5 months

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A Steel That Went Through Hottest Fire: Chapter IV - The Iron Enters the Soul

Chapter Summary: You travel to the Fold, to see your skiff setting off on its first journey. But something goes terribly wrong and it returns soon after with many dead and wounded. Not everyone is dead only thanks to a surprising revelation. Back in the Little Palace many things change.

Pairing: Aleksander Kirigan/Reader, Ivan/Fedyor Kaminsky

Characters: Aleksander Kirigan, Reader, Fedyor Kaminsky, Ivan, Zoya Nazyalensky, Alina Starkov, Mal Oretsev, Marie, Nadia Zhabin

Word Count: 4137

A/N: This chapter contains plot and dialogues from episode one to four of season one. Inspired by prompt: https://pl.pinterest.com/pin/207306389089791935/

Tag list (let me know if you want to be added or removed):

@budugu

@intothesoul

@mizelophsun11

@pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy

@zeeader

@marrymonrich

@wonderland2425

@chelseyyouraverageluigi

@thehufflepuffavenger1

It takes a small thing for you to finally figure it out. Suddenly, you know what exactly is needed for building a lighter and faster skiff, and you know how to make it. You even impress the King with your idea. Albeit, you're sure he has no idea what you're talking about when you introduce your idea to him and just pretends to understand that, since other smart people in the room are looking at each other in astonishment. Still, it's not that you care. You have his permission to build it.

The next days are filled with planning, sketching, work and a bit more work. You're sleeping schedule is pretty much not existing. You sleep just enough to rest, so you could continue working. Most of the times you're on Alkemi's potions that keep you focused, awake and full of energy (some Durasts even say you have now a bit too much energy).

Aleksander is, of course, worried by it and tries to talk some sense into you. But after he tries to drag you to sleep, you actually hiss at him like a very angry cat with a murderous look in your eyes. Kirigan is sure he hasn't backed out from anything as fast as this time. Or hasn't been that much scared of anyone.

The day comes, however, when the skiff is ready. You actually cry when you look at it in all its glory. Out of emotion, but mostly because you're just so glad it's finally finished and your work with it is over. Now all that remains is to take it for the first journey.

For some reason, you're not on the list of Grisha that are about to come across the Fold on the new skiff. True, Durasts don't cross it usually, but you assumed that since you're the one responsible for creating it, you'd go and supervise how it goes. Not that you're complaining. You are, however, to be present during its set off.

You arrive on the day the skiff launches. Together with Aleksander in his carriage. You jokingly ask him if he's going because he believes your new ultralight skiff is going to be a shining success or a spectacular failure. He looks you seriously in the eyes and answers he doesn't take into account the second option, because you're the one that supervised the creation of it. You blush, shut up and don't speak a word until the end of the journey.

Once you're there, Aleksander gets out of the carriage first and then helps you out. Immediately, you look at the Fold warily.

'It's your first time, isn't it?' Kirigan asks. 'Seeing it.'

'I wouldn't mind spend my life without seeing it,' you confess grimly. 'It's… massive. Much more than I've imagined. I'm really grateful I'm not the one who has to cross it.'

'Well, thanks to you, the one who do, will do it much faster now,' Aleksander says. You smile at him. You quickly stop, when a Grisha hurries to Kirigan and whispers something to him.

'The skiff launches in twenty minutes,' the Darkling says to you. 'Shall we find a good spot?'

'Might as well,' you agree. Aleksander gives some orders. Then, together you go and take your places in front of the Fold. You watch how everyone assigned for the trip get on the skiff. Soon, the gate is raised up and the sail lowered. Zoya summons the wind and the skiff moves. You're sure your heart stops for a moment when it happens.

'Don't worry,' Aleksander says, grabbing your hand. 'Everything is going to be perfectly alright. You made that skiff.'

'And that's why I'm so scared,' you admit. 'If something goes wrong… it will be my fault. Deaths of the people will be on me.'

'They're not going to die,' Kirigan says. You smile sadly.

'You can't know that,' you say, shaking your head. In silence, you watch how the skiff sails into the Fold and is swallowed by it. You exhale slowly.

'Now all we can do is wait,' Aleksander says. You nod and follow him into his tent.

You're not sure how much time has passed when it happens. But you're sure it's not much. You're standing in the entrance to Kirigan's tent, looking at the Fold. General has given up on trying to get you to stop and go back inside. Suddenly, a burst of light is seen in the Fold. You hear shouts of surprise. Your eyes open wide.

'General?' you call hesitantly. 'Either something is wrong with the new source of light David has made… or something strange is happening in the Fold…'

Aleksander comes to your side at once. He stiffens, baffled. He frowns. Together you watch how the light disappears.

'What is it?' you ask, afraid a bit.

'I don't know,' Kirigan answers. 'But I'm sure we're about to find out.'

You wait. After what seems like forever, the skiff returns, hurrying out of the Fold with a crash. It's destroyed in many places. The mission was a failure, but at least some have returned. Before Aleksander can stop you, you hurry to the skiff, to find out what happened, what went wrong. If something was wrong with the skiff… whether it was your fault…

You pass people rushing around your creation. Shouting orders, taking the wounded to the medical… taking out the dead… You hurry to the skiff. You almost crash into your friend.

'Zoya,' you say, relieved to see her alive. 'What happened?'

The Squaller grabs your arms tightly. You look at her with surprise.

'It was not your fault,' she says sternly. 'You hear me? Not your fault. Not the skiff's. It's not on you. Okay?'

'Okay,' you say quietly, nodding. You try to break free of Zoya's grip and see to the damages. But she just tightens her hold.

'Don't go yet,' she says. 'Let… Let them clean up a bit. You'd only be in their way.'

You look her in the eyes. She looks away. You know what she's trying to do. She doesn't want you to see more of the dead, more of the wounded. She doesn't want you to blame yourself for what happened to them.

'Zoya-' you start, your voice low.

'Anyway, you should go back to General's tent,' she interrupts you. You frown.

'Why is that?' you ask. Zoya glances behind her back.

'Because in a moment they're going to bring there someone who I believe is… the Sun Summoner,' she says hesitantly. You stare at her blankly. You blink and ask:

'I'm sorry… the who now?!'

You and Zoya reach Aleksander's tent before the (alleged) Sun Summoner. On your way there she tells you what happened and you're left speechless. You look at Kirigan, but as usual, his face is a mask void of emotion in public. So, you wait.

Finally, a young girl from the First Army is brought into the tent by two soldiers and a Healer in tow. You can see the fear in her eyes when they fall on the man in front of her, Aleksander, who's standing with his back to her by the table.

'Bring her closer,' he orders. The soldiers take the girl a few steps closer and let her go. They back away themselves. Kirigan turns around slowly and assesses her.

'Closer,' he says. She looks around, unsure, and takes one step forward.

'Well?' General asks, raising his eyebrows.

'Well, what?' the girl asks and hastily looks down. 'Sir.'

You smile slightly, already liking her. Zoya gently elbows your side and you quickly become serious.

'What are you?' Aleksander asks.

'Alina Starkov, Assistant Cartographer, Royal Corps of Surveyors,' the girls answers and you see something in her eyes. 'They're all gone. It's my fault. That's why I'm here, isn't it?'

'Answer the question,' Kirigan says, raising his hand, and leans on the desk. 'What are you?'

'A… mapmaker, sir,' Alina answers, confused. Some Grisha laugh. You clench your fist. Zoya discreetly takes your other hand and gives it a squeeze.

'Quiet,' Aleksander orders and the laughter stops. 'So who actually saw what happened? Zoya? You manned the main sail.'

'We were attacked barely two markers in,' Zoya, on whom all eyes are now, answers. 'Someone lit a lantern.'

'And?' Kirigan asks, looking at Alina, who's clearly feeling uncomfortable under his penetrating gaze.

'The Volcra went after the riflemen and our Inferni first,' Zoya goes on. 'And then there was a searing light.'

'It was her,' a soldier from the First Army says, pointing at Alina.

'Our mapmaker,' Aleksander says and tilts his head. 'Is this true? Can you… summon light?'

Alina shakes her head, scared and confused. Kirigan mimics her gesture.

'Where did you grow up?' he asks.

'Keramzin,' Alina answers.

'Hmm. And when were you tested?' Aleksander asks, but Alina doesn't answer. 'You… don't remember? Well, let us just… make certain.'

He stands up as he says it and walks to the map maker. He places his special ring on his thumb. You can see fear in Alina's eyes.

'Lift up your sleeve,' Kirigan says to her. He clouds the tent in his shadows.

'What's happening?' Alina asks, her eyes darting around.

'Your sleeve. Please,' Aleksander repeats. The cartographer lifts up her right sleeve slightly. Kirigan takes her hand and rolls it up higher. He cuts her arm… and a burst of light shots out of it and cuts through the tent. Everyone looks up at it. Alina stares at it in awe and shock.

You're stunned, too, of course. You look at Aleksander. He and the Sun Summoner (it's certain now) are looking at each other. Kirigan is smiling. She is afraid.

Aleksander lets go of her arm. She takes a few steps back, gasping.

'Take her to the Little Palace immediately,' Kirigan orders. And just like that, Alina is taken away. You stay for a moment longer inside the tent. When you get out, you see the Sun Summoner riding away in Aleksander's coach. An injured soldier is running after it, shouting her name. She's also shouting something at him from inside the coach. He doesn't reach her. You feel tears in your eyes.

Mama!

[Y/N]!

Mama!

No, please, what are you doing?!

MAMA!

'[Y/N]?' a voice pulls you out of your memories. You turn your head. Aleksander is looking at you with worry. Your look hardens. He takes a step back, surprised. You've never looked at him with such anger.

'What is it?' he asks.

'You didn't even let her say goodbye to her friends,' you say.

'She's in a great danger now, there's no time to lose,' Aleksander says. You scoff.

'I need to check on the skiff,' you say. Kirigan frowns and grabs your arm.

'[Y/N]-' he starts, but you harshly pull your arm away. You glare at him and march toward the skiff. You vent your frustration during repairing it. Some people want to help you, but quickly scatter away after seeing the murderous look in your eyes. You only look away from your work once, when you catch a glance of Aleksander riding after Alina. You scoff, still angry at him, and almost break a mast.

When you're done, on your way to the Grisha's tents you pass the First Army. You stop, noticing the man that was running after Alina. You stop and look at him. He's in a bad mood, same as you. You hesitate only a moment.

When he and his two friends notice you, they quickly stand up from their seats. You stop in front of him. You both eye each other warily. There are no warm feelings between the First and Second Armies.

'She didn't know,' you finally say. The man blinks.

'I'm sorry?' he asks.

'Miss Starkov,' you explain. 'She hasn't been hiding this from you. She was genuinely surprised during the testing. She didn't know.'

The man purses his lips. His friends exchange a look.

'She also didn't want to leave without saying goodbye to you,' you say. 'Or explaining this.'

Well, you're not sure about that. But judging how she was shouting and pounding on the coach when she saw her friend, you're pretty sure that's true.

'Thank you,' the man says after a moment, nodding. You nod back and turn to leave.

'What's your name?' the man calls after you. You stop and look behind your back.

'[Y/N] [L/N],' you answer yourself and glance at your kefta. 'A Durast.'

'Mal Oretsev,' the man introduces himself. 'A tracker.'

'Pleasure to meet you,' you say, smiling slightly. Mal opens his mouth to say something, but he stops seeing Zoya marching to you angrily.

'There you are!' she says, exasperated. 'I've just found out. Seriously? Have you really been repairing the skiff on your own the whole time?'

You glance nervously at the soldiers and see them staring at you with shock. You shrug at Zoya.

'Not my fault everyone has run off,' you answer and beam at her. 'But it's alright now. All fixed. It should be ready to go when they decide to try again.'

'One day my hair is going to turn white because of you,' Zoya says after a moment and grabs your arm. 'Come. You need sleep. And then you're going after General. No discussion. I'm setting off right now, but you need to rest.'

You do try to argue. No avail. Apparently Kirigan has left specific instructions before following the Sun Summoner. You are to be taken to the Little Palace as soon as the skiff doesn't require your presence to be fixed. But since it's already night, you're going the next day. Every Grisha agrees on that. No one wants to disobey General. Well, maybe you wouldn't mind, but you're clearly outnumbered on this one.

When you arrive at the Little Palace, everyone is already talking about the Sun Summoner. She's already been introduced to the King, showed him her power and has received her own kefta. She's also have had her ass kicked by Zoya. All of that you know from the rumours that travel fast in the walls. It's almost impossible to keep a secret here.

You see Alina again during supper. As usual, you arrive as one of the last. David is pleased to see you and asks you all sort of questions about the skiff and the catastrophe. And some about the Sun Summoner. The girl in question notices your arrival and looks at you with a frown, recognizing you from Kirigan's tent.

'That's [YN] [L/N],' Alina's new friend, Marie, an Inferni, says and rolls her eyes. 'General's favourite Durast.'

'Or pet, as some say,' Nadia, a Squaller and another of Alina's new friends, adds. 'No one really sees what he sees in her. But everyone knows it's better not to do something to her.'

'Why?' Alina asks, not taking her eyes off you.

'Or the punishment from General will be severe,' Marie answers. 'Honestly, all that fuss about her and she couldn't even make that ultralight skiff right.'

'There was nothing wrong with the skiff,' Alina quickly says. 'What happened… had nothing to do with the skiff.'

Marie and Nadia exchange a look but don't say anything. They finish their meal in peace and stand up to leave. At the door they almost collide with you.

'Miss Starkov,' you greet her. 'I'm glad to officially meet you. I'm [Y/N] [L/N], a Durast.'

'Pleasure,' Alina says. She's well aware of the little smirks of Nadia and Marie. You ignore them and focus on the Sun Summoner.

'I… I hope you won't think I was out of line,' you start slowly, causing Alina to frown. 'But I spoke with your friend. The one who… tried to talk to you before you left.'

Alina's eyes go wide. Nadia and Marie exchange a look.

'Is he alright?' the Sun Summoner asks. You nod.

'He's going to be fine,' you say. 'I… told him you didn't want to go before saying a proper goodbye to him. And that you didn't know. About being a Grisha.'

Alina blinks away the tears. She tries to calm down her breathing.

'What did he say?' she asks.

'He… thanked me for sharing this with him,' you answer. 'He couldn't say more, because our duties called.'

'I see,' Alina says and suddenly grabs your hand. 'Thank you. Truly.'

'Anytime, Miss Starkov,' you say and smile. 'And I mean it. The door to my room is always open for you.'

'Alina,' the Sun Summoner corrects you. You smile at her, glance at her friends who have a decency to look embarrassed, and turn to go. Only to collide with Fedyor chest.

'[Y/N],' he greets you. 'General wants to see you.'

And here goes your good mood. You force a polite smile.

'And I want the moon,' you say and walk away, leaving baffled Fedyor, Alina, Nadya and Marie. Yes, you're still angry. So, you go to the workshop to vent out your frustration on some poor piece of metal. Which maybe wasn't a good decision, since it's the first place anyone goes if they look for you. Including one certain General Kirigan.

'You know, I don't think I've known anyone who has the nerve to disobey me so barefacedly,' he says, walking to you casually.

'You must have spoiled me with your attention,' you murmur, not looking at him.

'Maybe I have,' Aleksander agrees.

'Then you can go away and not give me your attention,' you say, waving at him to go away. He raises his eyebrows. Then, he sighs.

'What have I done?' he asks, spreading his hands. 'Please, tell me.'

'I already told you,' you say, glaring at him.

'Is it about not letting Miss Starkov to say goodbye?' Aleksander asks. 'I told you already. She was in danger and could have been attacked at any moment. And she was. She almost died. She probably would have if we had waited a moment longer.'

'Do you know how she felt?' you ask, turning to face him abruptly. 'In one moment, she finds out she's a Grisha. All her world has crumbled around her. Usually, people go to someone they trust in such moments. And you… you pulled her away from them, not even letting her talk to them one last time. Do you know how she must have felt? Because I do.'

Tears shine in your eyes. Slowly, realisation downs on Aleksander. He looks at you, horrified.

'Saints, [Y/N]… I'm sorry,' he says and gulps. 'I forgot. I'm sorry.'

You blink your tears away and turn away from him. After a moment you feel him gently put his hands on your arms.

'I didn't mean to bring this memory up for you,' he says softly. 'I'm so, so sorry. Please, forgive me.'

'I know you didn't mean it,' you say a minute later and turn around with a sigh. 'I'm sorry. I overreacted.'

'No, don't be,' Aleksander says and hesitantly pulls you in for a hug. 'I know how much memories of your father upsets you. Especially the one about him taking you away from your mother.'

You let him comfort you for a moment longer. Then, you pull away.

'I missed our tea,' you say. Kirigan smiles.

'That's nothing you can't make up for,' he says and takes your hand in his. You smile back and let him take you to his chambers. All is good again between you two.

Alina takes you on your word and often comes to you for advice. At first, you're baffled by her interest in you. You quickly suspect she has some ulterior motives and plans to use you for something. After all, everyone else does. But you realise that with understanding how she felt and talking to her friend, you gained her eternal friendship. You're still not sure whether it's a good thing.

At the beginning, you're happy that she wants to be your friend and seeks you out. She even comes to you after one particular training with Baghra. You listen to her and nod understandingly.

'Honestly, is she such a nightmare to everyone?' she groans at one point.

'I've heard she is,' you confirm. Alina looks at you with suspicion.

'You've heard?' she repeats. 'She wasn't a nightmare to you?'

'No, for some reason my lessons with her weren't as terrible as everyone around me were talking they were,' you answer, tapping your finger on your chin in wonder. 'Maybe I got her respect after I almost killed her with my powers.'

'You did what?!' Alina asks, astonished. You don't answer her and hurry away. She chases you, demanding to hear the story. She doesn't, but you're both seen later laughing hysterically.

The days when the Sun Summoner's presence is a blessing to you come to an end at some point. You think it happens when she finally finds what was blocking her and her training with Baghra finally has some effects.

It starts when you come for your daily tea with Aleksander one day. You're surprised he's not in his chambers. You do find Fedyor there however.

'Oh, [Y/N],' he says, surprised, but quickly understand. 'You're here for your tea with General? I'm sorry to tell you he's left.'

'It's alright,' you say and head toward the table. 'I can wait.'

'He…' Fedyor stops you, clearly uncomfortable. 'He's just left. For a ride with Alina.'

You're still for a moment. You force a smile at the Heartrender.

'Thank you for telling me,' you say and head for the door. 'If you see him when he comes back, tell him I'm in the workshop.'

Aleksander doesn't come to the workshop. You don't even know when he's returned. You go to your bed with a troubled mind that night.

Sadly, it happens again. And again. And again. You can't tell how many times you've come to your daily tea not to find Kirigan there and hear he's somewhere with Alina. At some point… you simply stop coming to his chambers. He doesn't speak about it when he sees you. Your heart clenches in pain.

One day, you get out of workshop to get some fresh air. You stop dead in your tracks, seeing Aleksander walking with Alina. They're coming from the direction of Baghra's hut. And they're both smiling. Your stomach turns.

'[Y/N]?' Ivan asks with a frown, stopping by your side. You've been standing still for a few minutes now, staring at the pair with a blank face. He already considers shouting for General, thinking you're about to faint or something.

'Are you alright?' the Heartrender asks. You're silent for a moment. You watch how Alina says something and Aleksander laughs. She grins. And you mourn.

'You never know how much you love someone, until you watch them love someone else,' you say quietly. Ivan looks at you with wide eyes.

'You…?' he asks, astonished. You turn to him with a sad smile.

'Wasn't it obvious?' you ask. Ivan looks softens (which everyone believes is not possible).

'You've hid it very well,' he says quietly.

'I'm glad,' you say. Ivan hesitates.

'[Y/N]-' he starts.

'I'm not the first girl to be foolish enough to fall for General,' you interrupt him. 'And I certainly won't be the last.'

Ivan has no idea what to say. He's not the one people look for to seek comfort. Fedyor is better at that. Actually, anyone is better at that than him. He can pat you on your arm but he doubts it's going to be much help. Should he hug you? Oh, Saints, he hopes not. He'd be so awkward at this.

'I'll be fine,' you say and force a smile, knowing your friend is worried. 'I already know how to deal with a broken heart.'

You turn and start to walk away. You don't want to meet Alina and Aleksander. Not together. Not while they're laughing and giggling like teenagers in love. You love them both and don't want to hurt them with harsh words your jealous heart would surely cause you to spit out. Ivan stops you by grabbing your arm.

'Will you distance yourself from him?' he asks, knowing very well how much Kirigan needs your company. You close your eyes.

'As if I ever would manage to do that,' you say. Ivan lets you go. You hurry away and back to the Little Palace, blinking away the tears.

Your torture continues. Alina grows stronger. Aleksander spends less and less time with you. You throw yourself at work to ignore the pain in your heart. But it hardly helps. Because while you're used to people breaking your heart, it feels different with Kirigan. He actually saw you and understood you. And now he chose someone else. Once again, you're left with metals and other substances. Alone.

A/N: Thank you for reading! Let me know your thoughts! Reblog, like and comment if you could.

This can also be found on Archive of Our Own: https://archiveofourown.org/works/52696933/chapters/133684612

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