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#i feel like i always say 'i'm not normally like this'
nanaslutt · 2 days
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shameless
ʚ yuta x reader
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ʚ cont: fem reader, fluffy fluff, jealousy, possessiveness, clingy!yuta
note: congrats @dracrimes for winning my fic giveaway, I hope you enjoy ^.^
MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DO NOT FOLLOW
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"Um...I'll take the brown sugar boba please!" You chirped to the young-looking waitor, who nodded and smiled as he took your order. "Is it gonna be normal sugar, hon?" He asked, tilting his head at you and squinting his eyes a bit as he voiced the pet name. You were so busy looking at the delicious desserts on the menu that you didn't hear the pet name, and you didn't notice the spike in Yuta's cursed energy. 
"I'll take it a little sweeter than normal please!" You asked, handing your menu to the man in front of you. Yuta's eyes were glued to where your hands met as the waiter's finger grazed across your own. "Extra sweet drink for an extra sweet girl." He said, winking at you. Your eyes opened a bit in surprise, but you ultimately shrugged it off, thinking he was joking. 
At this point, Yuta felt his blood boiling. Was he stupid? Was he so dense that he wasn't able to realize you were on a date right now, or was he so shameful that he didn't even care? Yuta wasn't used to feeling like this. It was rare that he experienced jealousy like this regarding another person. He balled his fist by his side and reached his hand across the table with one hand to adjust your bracelet which had gone crooked, a small show of affection in front of the waitor. 
"Are you getting anything Yu?" You asked sweetly, your chest swelling with love as you watched his fingers drag down your wrist to play with your fingers. Yuta looked up from your hands and smiled sweetly, his jaw clenching under the weight of his teeth as he tried to calm himself before he spoke. "I'm okay baby, I'll just have some of yours." You were unable to stop your eyebrows from shooting upward in surprise at the nickname. 
It was rare that Yuta used pet names with you, he always got so flustered whenever he tried, so you felt your heart jump when you heard the pet name. You missed the way the corner of the waiter's mouth twitched as he watched Yuta talk sweetly to you in front of him. It was quite obvious what he was doing. You on the other hand were in your own little world, listening to your internal voice scream as you replayed the nickname over in your head. 
After the waitor walked away, Yuta quickly got up from his place across from you and scooched into your side of the booth. "You're being so cute today, what was that?" You teased, tilting your head to the side at him as you took his hand in your own, resting your hands over your knee. "You never call me baby." Yuta felt his demeanor change the instant you had called him out. His face went red and he looked away, covering his mouth with his hand as he poorly disguised his embarrassment as a cough.
"I uh, I don't know. Just wanted to say it." He said bashfully, turning his head back your way. "So cute." You gushed, squeezing his hand tighter in your own. Yuta sighed and plopped his forehead down on your shoulder, his breath tickling your arm. "Don't tease me, I just wanted to try it out." He mumbled under his breath. You brought your other hand up and ruffled his hair, making him sit up and look at you with a slight pout as you continued to play with his hair. 
While Yuta looked into your eyes the only thing he could think about was how lucky he is, how grateful he is to call you his. And you were, you were his, not that waiter's. Yuta felt bad for feeling so malicious toward the waitor when you had no idea. Maybe he was overreacting, but it still stands that you were his, and he hated to see people hit on you so blatantly when he was sitting right there. He had enough of being treated like he was being invisible for an entire lifetime. It sucked being treated that way on his own, but it sucked even more when you were involved. 
"Alrightyy, here's that extra sweet boba for you, hun," Yuta swore he felt a blood vessel in his head pop when that same man's irritating voice echoed from behind him. Yuta still had a smile on his face while he looked at you, but the second he turned his head there was nothing but a smile on his face. He would never treat staff this way, but this time was different. He called you that stupid pet name not once, but twice now? 
The waitor had a blood-boiling smirk on his face as Yuta turned around, the two boys making eye contact with one another. You were blissfully unaware of their little rivalry as your mouth started to drool while staring at your drink in his hand. Yuta stopped his hand in motion by grabbing the cup in his own when he looked like he was trying to set it in front of you. "I got it," Yuta said coldly, not even daring to blink as he grabbed the cup from the weaker waitor with ease. 
"Right, just make sure you look on the side of the cup little lady, left a little something for you." The waitor explained, directing his focus on you and winking before he walked off. Yuta grits his teeth as he burns the face of that man into his brain, imagining what he would do to him if he could. "Yu look! The top is a bear how cute." You exclaimed, your voice instantly melting away some of the anxiety and malice he was feeling.
Yuta turned his head back to you and rested his head in his hand by placing his elbow on the table as he watched you enjoy your drink. "How is it?" He asked, his heart swelling with love as he watched your eyes light up with joy. "It's soooo good! Try some." You offered, holding the drink up to his lips. He hated to hear you praise the drink that man made, but he closed his mouth around the straw and sipped down some of the liquid. It was a little too sweet for his taste, but it was fitting for someone like you. 
"Good huh?" You said, smiling as you pulled the cup away from him. Yuta watched curiously as your smile turned into confusion as your eyes read something on the side of the cup. "Oh..." You said, looking uncomfortable all of a sudden. "I think the waitor left his number on my drink." You said, your expression dropping as you turned the cup around to face Yuta. 
The inside of Yuta's head felt like a battlefield as he sat up and grabbed the cup, reading the number over. He took a special interest in the little heart on the side of the cup. "I thought the names he was calling me were a little weird, but I think it's pretty obvious we're together." You laughed. Yuta found nothing funny about the situation, he wanted to throw the drink and the soiled cup at the shameless employee, but he had to hold himself together for you.
"You okay Yuta, don't let it bother you, okay?" You said, caressing his cheek and taking the drink back from him. "I'm fine." He nodded, leaning into your touch. He wanted nothing more than to get out of the shop and go back home with you. Spend some time watching a movie or sitting in the garden alone with you, where he doesn't have to worry about other people ogling you or trying to take you away. 
"Is it okay if we leave?" Yuta asked, grabbing your hand that held his face. You felt your heart skip a beat as you watched Yuta close his eyes and bask in your touch. You think you were starting to catch on to why Yuta was being so uncharacteristically clingy, but you didn't want to say something and make him stop acting so cute. "Of course, you feeling okay?" You asked, letting him hold your hand.
"I'm okay, just wanna leave now. Getting a little tired." He said, smiling softly at you. You nodded and began to gather your things. "I'll throw this away for you." Yuta offered sweetly, picking up your finished cup of boba. Yuta made a point to find the trash can closest to the register, where the boy from earlier was standing, waiting for customers. Yuta watched him like a hawk, hoping he would notice him throw the cup with his number on it away. Sure enough, the boy looked over and watched with raised eyebrows as Yuta threw the drink away with a little more force than necessary, the trash shaking from the impact.
The boy sucked his teeth and squinted his eyes at Yuta, watching him turn his back on him and walk back to your table. "Ready?" Yuta offered, holding his hand out for you as you got up to sit from the booth. "Mhm." You smiled, letting him take your hand in his and walk out of the cafe. "I'm actually glad you said something, I was getting a little tired myself." You said as you walked hand in hand down the street, drinking in what was left of the sun before it set soon. 
"I'm glad, I didn't want to ruin anything if you wanted to stay," Yuta said, resting his head on the top of your head as you walked together. You smirked and squeezed his hand tighter. "That guy really bothered you huh?" You asked, slowing as you walked up to a crosswalk and hit the button, watching the cars go by. Yuta felt his face heat up as he rubbed the back of his head. You tilted your head at him and smiled, watching his eyes dart around as his face scrunched in embarrassment.
"It's okay Yu, I love you and only you. I don't even remember his face if that makes you feel better." You giggled, smiling up at him. Good thing Yuta remembered his face well enough for the both of you. He wasn't going to let him off the hook so easily. Maybe he would have Panda and Inumaki call the establishment over and over again and complain about him to get him fired. That would make him feel better. Yeah, he would probably do that, and you didn't have to worry about a thing.
Yuta stepped towards you and wrapped his arms around your shoulders, holding you tightly against his chest. "Good, because I don't either," Yuta replied, lying in his words. He would never forget such an ugly face so easily. You rubbed your face against his chest and squeezed him tightly, so tight he let out a funny noise of discomfort as you squeezed all the air from his lungs before pulling away. 
"Don't be jealous okay? We can spend the rest of the day cuddling in my room when we get back." Yuta couldn't help the smile that spread across his face as he looked at you, his heart brimming with joy and satisfaction. He nodded and let you escape his grasp fully as you took his hand in your own and started walking across the street, dragging him along with you. "Just an FYI though, I like it when you're clingy with me, it's cute." You giggled, looking back at him.
"Alright, alright," Yuta said, waving his free hand in front of him, trying to get you to change the topic. You giggled at his embarrassment as he stumbled over his own feet while crossing the street. Yuta was so lucky to have someone as comforting as you as a partner, already he felt the malice from earlier melt off of his body, but the need to hold your hand tightly still prevailed until long after the two of you got back to the dorms.
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roosterforme · 1 day
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Covering the Classics Part 8 | Bob Floyd x OC
Summary: Now that Anna knows what Bob's hands feel like when he's holding her close, she doesn't know how to stop herself from going back for more. But she's unwilling to even humor Bob when it comes to what he wants the most.
Warnings: Fluff, angst, adult language, masturbation, eventually 18+
Length: 5300 words
Pairing: Robert "Bob" Floyd x Female OC (this story is part of the Beer Boy/Sugar and Jake/Jessica universe)
Covering the Classics masterlist. Check my masterlist for more!
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"I'm waiting for you to thank me."
Bob looked up to see Nat in front of him with a little smirk painted on her lips. He'd been spending the last twenty minutes trying to act normal, something he forgot how to do after Anna kissed him in the kitchen. Because it wasn't just a kiss, it was everything. It felt like she really wanted him.
"Thank you for what?" he asked cautiously.
Nat laughed heartily like he'd just told a very amusing joke. "For pushing you and Anna together. Bradley told me the situation, and that woman was jealous of me touching you. Her face was all pinched, and her lips were pressed into a tight line. Jealous. She wants you. And my god, she's hot. What the fuck do they do at San Diego State? Only interview you if you've got your PhD and a modeling contract?"
Bob knew he was blushing, and he was happy she wasn't calling him out on it. His friends were all talking about him and Anna behind his back at this point, trying to figure out what was going on. "We kind of just made out in the kitchen," he muttered, glancing across the yard at Anna who was talking to Jess and still holding the can of ginger ale he gave her.
"Yes!" Nat said with absolutely no subtlety, slapping Bob's shoulder. "Oh fuck, the two of you will have the cutest kids! Freckles and strawberry blonde hair!"
He had to close his eyes against the idea of it, willing the flush in his cheeks to subside. When he opened them again, Anna was looking right at him. Her gaze was a little unsure, and he was starting to get afraid she wouldn't let him drive her home later. But he wanted to walk her up to her door. He had been thinking about it since the very first time he drove her home.
"It's not like we're together or anything," he muttered.
"Yet," Nat told him, looking so certain. "Not yet."
It was getting late, the sun dipping lower in the sky. The temperatures would start cooling down once it was dark, and Anna was only wearing shorts. Bob's eyes easily found those freckles on her thighs once again. Her skin looked so damn soft. He wondered if he would feel goosebumps beneath his fingers if he traced that pretty pattern, gently connecting her freckles with an imaginary line. He had to swallow hard as she started heading his way.
Nat squeezed his wrist and muttered something about work, and then she vanished into the house. With Anna standing right in front of him, Bob wished he could just lean in and kiss her the way Jake always did with Jess, and the way Bradley always did with his wife. He wanted it. With Anna.
"I'm getting a little chilly," she told him. "I guess I overestimated how warm autumn was going to be in San Diego. It's still better than New Jersey though." She was talking to him like she hadn't been rubbing the front of those little shorts against the fly of his jeans barely an hour ago, and now he was sweating.
"You should wear jeans next time," he replied before realizing how stupid he sounded. "Not that you should be covering your legs or anything like that! You have very nice legs. Nice freckles? I just don't want you to be cold."
He cradled his forehead in his hand while Anna laughed softly. "I'll wear jeans next time. Do you think you could give me a ride home soon?"
"Sure," he promised immediately. "Absolutely."
"Great." Then she turned, and Bob heard her saying goodbye to Jessica. Why was he so awkward? Why was that exchange so weird? How was he supposed to make Anna want to kiss him again when he could barely string two normal sentences together?
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Anna was trying to make a quick getaway, craving another few minutes alone with Bob. His truck was cozy, and she knew it would feel warm. His voice was sexy, and so was the way he moved. She wanted to kiss him again, even though she knew it was a terrible idea.
"Take some leftovers!"
"No, I'm fine," Anna told the hosts as Bradley tried to talk her into taking some of the extra burgers home. "But thank you." She was terrified that Jess may have said something about how sad Anna's lunches were; she had been doing her best to hide her current financial state from her friends, but she must have slipped up somehow.
"Well, will you come over for dinner one night? I love cooking for Sugar, but I always end up making way too much food."
Anna looked down at her feet. "Sure. I could do that. Jake invited me over there, too. I know he always cooks for Jess."
"Okay," Bradley said, his voice a little rough and his face annoyed when Anna looked up. "I'm a lot better at cooking than Jake is, first of all. Second of all, why don't you have dinner at his lame ass condo, and then let me know what he cooked. Then I'll cook a much better version of it for you and Sugar one night."
She was trying not to laugh; she knew they were competitive, but she didn't know it was quite this bad. "That sounds great, Bradley. Thanks for inviting me over today."
He just waved her off. "You're always welcome. You're one of us." He said it so casually before he started scraping the grill and cleaning it up, Anna just stared at the pattern of his tie dye shirt for a few seconds. He considered her part of this group now? This ridiculously cool friend group? If she thought about it for too long, she knew she would start crying. 
"Thanks," she whispered, turning and running directly into Bob's solid chest.
When she looked up at him as her fingers grazed along his shirt, he asked, "You ready to head out?"
"Yeah." Anna felt the slight pressure of Bob's hand at her lower back, guiding her toward the door.
"After you," he said softly. 
Anna had to walk inside the house and past Natasha, who she had clearly embarrassed herself in front of before. But the brunette just waved goodbye like she was completely unfazed by the events from earlier. Like it was totally normal for Bob and Anna to be together, heading out front to his truck as the setting sunset turned the sky orange.
Bob pulled the door open and helped her into his truck, and Anna thought maybe it was okay for this to be normal? To get a ride home from Bob after kissing him in her friend's kitchen? To have a painfully unrelenting crush on him that made her feel like perhaps love was a choice that you made for yourself? 
She watched him walk around the font of the truck, his glasses catching the last rays of sunlight as the streetlights started to warm up. He was beautiful. He climbed into the truck gracefully and looked at her bashfully. She was the reason he wasn't more confident right now; she knew it, and she was annoyed with herself for it.
He cleared his throat quietly and said, "Before I forget, I have your copy of Papillon." Then he reached for the glovebox, his knuckles brushing her bare knee. "Sorry," he whispered, pulling his hand away immediately.
Anna's heart was in her throat. How was she supposed to tell him that she liked it when he touched her, even by accident. He reached for the glovebox again, this time making sure his movements kept him clear of her leg. "It's okay," she told him, breathing deep. "I didn't mind it."
The only answer she got was Bob carefully handing her worn out book back to her. There was another little note folded up inside which made her remember she never read the one that was in Wuthering Heights before she left it in her office at work. He started the engine. The drive back to her place was too long, and too short at the same time. She was surprised to find that he was heading in the right direction without a reminder about her address. As the sky darkened, Anna tried to listen to the music playing on the radio, but all she could really hear was the sound of her own heart pounding. 
When Bob parked the truck in front of her building, she watched him squeeze the steering wheel with both hands while he stared out the windshield. "Anna...when you say you didn't mind it when I touched you...what does that mean? And what happened back at the cookout? Am I allowed to kiss you now? Or am I supposed to just figure out how to get over you?"
She fumbled with her seatbelt, heart thundering at the sound of his unsure voice. She wanted to ask him why he even liked her, because she had literally nothing to offer someone like Bob Floyd. But instead she said, "I meant I like it when you touch me. Even if it's by accident."
He turned to look at her, and when he saw she was crawling across the seat, his eyes went wide, and his hands slid from the steering wheel. "Anna." He inhaled a sharp breath when she planted one hand between his thighs, brushing his jeans with her fingers. She couldn't stand him thinking she didn't want him for another second. He was all she wanted. Somehow moving to San Diego got her some actual friends and a job she liked, and now a decent man with only green flags was into her, and she just couldn't make him think she felt otherwise. Even if they couldn't be together.
Bob's hands were planted on the seat at his sides, and he wasn't moving an inch as Anna straddled his legs. It was dark out, but she could see his gaze dip down to her cleavage before he met her eyes. When he spoke, his voice was deep with need. "Is it okay if I touch you now?"
"Please."
Anna's little cry of delight echoed through the cab of the truck as soon as Bob's hands settled on her bare thighs. His touch was light yet intentional, and it just left her wanting more. He was running his thumb along the frayed edge of her denim shorts, teasing her as he whispered, "I want to kiss you."
She didn't answer. Instead she reached for him, letting her fingers sink into his silky hair, leaning closer until her lips met his again. The kisses in the kitchen had been a little frantic, forcing her to get over the fact that Bob didn't want Natasha. He wanted Anna. But this was something different. Languid and slow. Needy yet decisive. She wanted to touch the rough stubble of his cheek, so she did. She wanted to feel his bottom lip tugged gently between hers, so she did. Then she parted her lips and tasted him.
The scrape of her nails along his jaw had his fingers sliding up inside the bottom of her shorts, and she wished she wasn't wearing them at all. She wanted to know the feel of his hands everywhere. "Anna," he murmured against her lips. She tugged on his hair and kissed him a little rougher, but she gasped and gave up control as soon as his big hands found their way over her shorts to her hips and yanked her snug against him. There was no more polite distance. No more breathing room. Just his hard body pressed to her soft one.
Bob's glasses were cool against her cheek, keeping her grounded as his fingers met the skin of her lower back while he tasted her tongue. His touch tickled her, and she rolled her hips forward, earning a grunt of pleasure from him. "Please," Anna whined, like it was the only word she even knew. Then her mouth was back on his. Bob's fingers traveled an inch higher, and she ground against him, but this time he broke the kiss.
When he tipped his head back, he looked bashful in the glow from the streetlights. She could feel him. He was getting hard for her, and it was delicious. Her brain supplied every suggestive line of poetry it had ever absorbed in her lifetime, and all she wanted was to make him get harder. 
She was ready to start unzipping his jeans when he eased his hands away from her body and whispered, "Will you let me walk you to your door? I've been wanting to do that for weeks."
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It was slow going, trying to get to Anna's apartment door. They kept stopping to kiss, even going so far as to end up with her body pinned between his and the wall in the stairwell. Her soft laughter as he kissed the side of her neck echoed through the enclosed space, and then she said his name.
"Bob."
Actually, it was more like a whine, and it reverberated off of the walls beautifully. "Yes, Anna?" he whispered, letting her lace their fingers together. He wanted to do this all the time. He wanted to be her boyfriend. 
She just made a strangled sound as he kissed as many of her freckles as he could get his lips on before pulling her away from the wall. Then they finally made it upstairs to her door. If she invited him inside, he wasn't sure what she would expect. As much as he was ready to skip all of the pleasantries, he knew he needed to do this just right.
"Oh," she whispered, seemingly to herself as she unlocked her door. But she didn't turn the knob as she looked back at him over her shoulder. Her pretty brown eyes flashed with concern, so he took a step away, but then she just looked sad. 
"Everything okay?" he asked. She nodded. "Will I get to see you this week? I'd love to buy you a ginger ale at the Hard Deck. Or Chippy's."
She bit her lip before abandoning the door and wrapping her arms around his neck. She was all rough kisses on her tiptoes, and Bob was ready to turn the knob, head inside and deal with the consequences later. But she ran her tongue along his bottom lip before pulling away from him just as quickly. "I need to...I'll see you later, Bob."
In a flash, she squeezed herself in through the smallest gap imaginable, and then she gently closed her apartment door behind her. Bob stood there for a minute, his cock still half hard in his jeans as he stared at the spot where Anna had just been standing. She was giving him whiplash at this point, but maybe he sort of liked that kind of thing.
He quickly adjusted himself in his jeans before heading back downstairs and out into the cool night. He was going to have to ask Jake or Bradley how long he needed to wait before asking Anna out. They would know what to do. And he had Nat back now as well. He had enough resources that he would figure it out.
But the next day after work, they all seemed to make everything more confusing for him. 
"So did you finally fuck her then?" Bradley asked casually as he put deodorant on in the locker room.
"Well, no," Bob muttered. "We just made out for a bit."
"Kids these days," Bradley muttered, shaking his head. "Well, did you at least thank Nat? For coming to your rescue?"
Bob sighed, knowing this man was going to be no help after all. "I already talked to Nat," Bob replied as they walked out of the locker room. 
Of course Natasha was in the hallway and did a double take. "Did I just hear my name? I've been so popular since I got home yesterday." Her smile slipped into a look of excitement. "Did you fuck the redhead?"
Bob cradled his forehead in his hand. "Her name is Anna. And no, because I'm actually trying to date her."
"Why not both?" Nat asked, leading the way out to the parking lot. "Give that girl what she so desperately wants."
Bob was scared Anna was going to pull away again. He hadn't heard from her at all since last night when she disappeared into her apartment. He wasn't sure if he was supposed to be texting her or not today. It was like he was living in a choose your own adventure story, but somehow none of the options were correct.
He turned right toward his truck while Bradley and Nat both turned left, but then he realized that Jake had parked next to him and was already in his own truck talking on the phone. Bob tried to sneak past, but Jake put his window down and said, "Jess wants to know what's up with you and Anna."
"Is she on the phone?" Bob asked, tossing his bag into his own truck.
"Hi!" came Jessica's voice through Jake's bluetooth. "What did you do to Anna? She was practically singing when she showed up at lunch today."
Bob immediately scrambled toward Jake's truck and stuck his head in the window. "She was?"
"Yes. And she was having a hard time paying attention. You know how she gets when her head is in the clouds."
Jake met Bob's wide eyed gaze and smiled. "You should go to her office hours," the other man drawled. "That's like a green light for fucking on her desk."
"Hey!" Jessica complained through the phone while Bob grimaced. "Jake, keep your mouth shut about it. But yes, Bob, you should go to her office hours. She'd probably really like that. It shows you're thinking about her."
Well Bob was almost never not thinking about Anna, so maybe it wasn't a bad idea. "Take her some flowers," Jake added. "Seriously, man, she'll be handing you her panties within a minute."
"Hey!" came Jessica's voice again, and this time Bob ducked into his own truck, not wanting to hear any more of that conversation.
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Monday was a bit of a blur. The first thing Anna did when she got to her office was grab her copy of Wuthering Heights from her shelf. The note she forgot to read from Bob made her smile right away.
This book made me feel like it's okay to be completely caught up in another person to the point where you forget where you are or what you're doing. Also, I'm going to think of you every time I see a dog eared page for the rest of my life.
She whimpered softly. There had been a similar, slightly more intimate note tucked inside Papillon when she checked it last night after she squeezed herself into her depressingly tiny apartment in embarrassment. She would never be able to invite Bob inside for anything. Not for a cup of tea, and not for a sleepover.
After that, Anna spent the entire night on Sunday reading her favorite poems and touching herself. Sky Writing seemed to have fallen in love, based on his new post. That idea wasn't surprising at all. Anna was convinced he was the perfect man, so it was just a matter of time. But the thing that did surprise her was the way he wrote about a certain woman with red hair. Late into the night, she was laying in her tiny bed with her fingers inside the font of her underwear, picturing Bob as she read the words to herself.
It was almost too much. Her lips were still a little bit puffy on Monday from all the making out, and she felt sated if only by her own touch. She knew Bob's beautiful hands would be so much better, and she was still thinking about them when she went to find her friends at lunchtime. 
Tuesday wasn't much better. The only damper was that she hadn't heard a single word from Bob. Nothing. She hadn't texted him either, because what was she supposed to say? Hi, I think I could fall in love with you, but I'm not allowed. Can we still make out? That would be the worst idea in the world.
"She's got her head in the clouds again."
Anna blinked a few times and realized she was sitting by the weird tree with the warm sunlight on her face. Her uneaten sandwich was in her hand, hovering halfway to her mouth, and she had been staring off into the distance. "Sorry," she muttered, finally taking a bite. Her lunch didn't even seem as sad today as she thought about Bob's hands on her thighs. 
"Can you blame her?" Jessica asked. "She kissed Bob."
"Not one bit," the other woman said with a grin, as if Anna wasn't even there. "He's a damn catch. Sweetest man ever."
Anna rolled her eyes and said, "As if you aren't married to the human equivalent of a golden retriever."
"Oh, so she is paying attention," Jessica said with a laugh. "We thought you'd blasted off for planet Bob with no return ticket."
"Your astrophysics jokes are the worst," the other woman said, and Jessica pretended to pout.
"Listen. All I know is that he's a great kisser, and that his hands fit really nicely right here," Anna said pointing to her back and her hips. Both women squealed in delight. "But I can't take things any further with him."
"Why not?" Jessica demanded. "The two of you have been playing this game since you met at the bookstore. And also since you met again at the Hard Deck."
Anna thought about Kevin and all of her money that she'd never see again. She thought about her manuscripts she'd put on hold to work three jobs. She thought about how she'd willingly given up Princeton for him.
"I don't want to drag him down to where I am," she whispered, running her finger along the condensation on her can of ginger ale. "I can't be in a relationship." That's all she wanted to say about Bob and Kevin right now, still too afraid to tell her friends everything. So she cleared her throat and asked, "What's with the cooking rivalry between Bradley and Jake? It's like an episode of Chopped." That seemed to open a very controversial can of worms, but at least the focus shifted away from her personal life.
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Bob didn't even know what kind of flowers were the right ones to get, and once again, everyone else gave him useless information. 
"I rarely get flowers for Sugar. I usually just grab some good beers on my way to pick her up from school, and that's enough to seal the deal. Then I get to drink the beer I like while my hot wife goes dow-"
"We get the picture, Bradshaw," Jake said loudly. "Bob, just get some cheap flowers and save the money to make her dinner one night."
"Do not get her cheap flowers!" Natasha chimed in. "If the two of you weren't attractive looking," she said, pointing to Bradley and Jake, "Sugar and Jessica would have bailed before they bothered to uncover actual brain cells underneath the pretty hair." Both men looked startled before eventually nodding in agreement. "You need to get good flowers and plan to invite her for dinner. Not one or the other," Nat finished, pounding her fist into her other palm. "No wonder Bob never gets laid when I'm not around to straighten everything out."
"Can we not talk about that?" he mumbled, adjusting his glasses. "And it's not like I just want to...get laid. By just anybody."
"Yeah, yeah," Natasha said, tapping away on her phone. "You're a romantic. Go get her flowers like these ones."
Bob examined her screen when she held it up for him. He memorized the red and orange blooms the best he could, and soon they started to remind him of Anna's hair. "Got it," he told her, turning toward his truck before anyone else could tell him something that may or may not end up being useful. He'd get the flowers and then invite her over. He wasn't as good at cooking as Jake or Bradley, but he'd try anyway. He was mostly out of practice since he didn't have anyone to cook for, really, but they both offered to send him their favorite recipes. 
The florist was nice and listened to him ramble about orange and red flowers for a minute before putting together something that was even prettier than he could have imagined. The sixty dollar price tag shocked him, but it didn't stop him from also grabbing a book from the front window of the shop next door. It was a new one he'd been wanting to read himself, not quite one of the classics that Anna seemed to favor, but he figured she wouldn't have read it yet. He'd let her borrow it and dog ear all the pages up, and then he'd read it and think about her the whole time.
But when he got to the San Diego State University campus, he sat in his truck and stared at the clock on his dashboard. It was 6:32. She had office hours until 7:00, so he really needed to head in there. Doubt was creeping in now, because they left things off at a weird place. He had no idea what Anna really wanted from him, if anything. If she told him no or hesitated today, he was going to have to start sorting out his feelings for her and dismantling them bit by bit.
It was 6:47 by the time he finally made his way through the academic building on his way to Anna's office. Several people turned and looked at him in his khaki uniform with the huge bouquet of flowers in his hand, and this would have been a lot less stressful if Anna was actually his girlfriend and not a woman he thought might never be that. When he reached the hallway that smelled like freshly baked bread, he found her small office right away where it was tucked back from the main walkway. The door was ajar, and he could hear her voice, so he stood there in the hallway a little awkwardly, trying to fight the urge to run back to his truck.
The door opened another inch, and Bob could see Anna's fingers and her burgundy painted nails peeking out as her voice got louder. "Here's a copy of the extra study guide. Don't forget there's a quiz on Monday. If you can ace that, then I think you'll be in better shape for the final. And try not to be too hard on yourself, Hemingway can be a bit of a challenge for anyone."
"Thanks, Dr. Webber."
The door opened all the way, and a young man filed out with a frown on his face, and then Anna was just standing there right in front of Bob. Her hair was in a loose braid, her lips had some sort of purple-ish gloss on them, and she was wearing some snug jeans and an SDSU sweatshirt. "Bob," she breathed, and it sounded like music. Her gaze raked over his uniform and the vibrant flowers before returning to his face, brown eyes more vulnerable than he ever thought they should be.
"Hi, Anna." He couldn't think of anything better to say as she backed up a step into her small office and nodded her head once for him to join her. After two of his long strides, Bob was practically bumping into her desk. Then she closed the door and leaned against it, hands tucked behind her back.
She cleared her throat, but her voice was still soft as she said, "You look nice in your uniform."
"Thanks," he replied automatically. She could have said anything, and he would have thanked her.
"Those are beautiful. Are they for me?" she whispered, eyes falling to the flowers again.
"Of course they are."
Bob watched her eyelashes brush her cheeks as her eyes fluttered closed. "You didn't have to do that. Flowers are so expensive."
"I got you a book, too," he said, sliding it out from behind the bouquet. Her eyes snapped open so she could read the title, and he said, "It's a new release, so I was hoping you didn't preorder it or anything."
Anna's cheeks were growing pinker by the second, making her freckles look more prominent. He was about to ask if she wanted to come over for dinner one night when she launched herself across the three feet of empty space, colliding softly with his body. Bob dropped the flowers and the book onto her desk just as she kissed him, her arms coming up to wrap around his neck.
She kissed him like they did this all the time, and his hands went right to her waist where they fit perfectly. "Thank you," she murmured against his lips. "Nobody ever got me books before you."
The words before you echoed in his brain. He didn't want there to be an after. He wanted this to be the real deal where neither of them had to be in a relationship where they weren't constantly trading books back and forth with someone. 
Anna kissed him until his glasses were crooked, and she raked her fingers through his hair until he was sure it was a mess. And somehow she ended up pushing him back until he was sitting on the edge of her desk with his long legs splayed apart. He knew he was in trouble; he could feel himself slipping already. She let her hands trail down the back of his neck, over his shoulders, and down the front of his shirt. She adjusted all of his pins and touched his name tag along the way as her lips barely brushed his. Her fingers moved so slowly, he thought maybe he could get himself under control, but it was no use. He was hard in his pants, and her exploratory hands weren't stopping.
"Anna."
All that did was make her kiss him harder again.
"Please."
All that did was have her pressing the font of her jeans to his khakis with a little gasp. Maybe the guys had been right about this kind of thing after all. Maybe visiting her during office hours was all it was going to take to get to the next level. Her fingers made it all the way down to his thighs, scraping along just inches from his erection, and Bob was afraid he was going to embarrass himself. He thought about icebergs and refrigerators and the Arctic Circle, but nothing alleviated the aching heat under his skin as Anna licked his lip and almost nudged the tip of his cock.
But then she said the most devastating sentence he could think of. "Bob, I really like you. But we're just friends, okay?" Then she kissed him again like she hadn't spoken something so harsh, and he thought maybe he imagined it. "Just really good friends who make out with each other."
"Fuck," he grunted, trying to get control even as his hands kneaded the bare skin of her lower back. "Anna." He swallowed hard and pulled his mouth away from hers, examining her wide eyes. Her teeth sank into her pouty bottom lip when he said, "I was going to invite you over for dinner later this week."
"As friends?" she whispered, her hands still planted on his thighs. 
Bob nodded like an idiot, because once again, he was going to agree to anything she said right then. "Sure."
She kissed him softly and said, "Okay."
-------------------------
But is it okay? Is it really? Next up, let's see how this dinner goes. We might need Nat to fully step in and take care of business again. Also, I love Bradley and Jake in this chapter so so so much! Thanks @beyondthesefourwalls
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masonreds · 3 days
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mason mount x reader
Summary: Y/N distances herself from Mason thinking that it would help her feelings.
word count: 3,7k words
notes: sorry if this is a bit too dramatic for you’re liking 👀 also take a shot for everytime y/n says sorry 😂😂 I’ve also not posted in a while so please leave feedback if you can, it will be appreciated 💞
This isn't how you expected tonight to go.
Here you were, in the bathroom locked away from the fun downsatairs, away from your own birthday party. You just couldn't handle it anymore.
You couldn't handle your feelings for him anymore. You hated being friends when deep down you know you knew what you wanted and the possibility of him turning you down, rejecting you just thinking about it made you an anxious mess.
You couldn't keep this up anymore. You wanted more.
The knocking on the bathroom door made you snap back into reality, and you already knew who it was without them even talking.
You just knew it was Mason.
The person who'd you been trying to avoid for the rest of the night.
'Last I checked, the afterparty hasn't been moved to the bathroom.'
'I'll just be a minute!' You say, trying to sound normal enough.
'What's wrong?' Apparently not.
'What do you mean? I'm just freshening up a bit.'
'What's bothering you?'
'i don't know what you mean,' you try to laugh it off , but the pressure in your chest becomes a little too tight and it comes out as a more gasping noise than a light chuckle. You clear your throat. 'i told you, I'll be out in a minute. It's getting late, everybody else has probably gone, you can go too. I'll see you tomorrow, yeah?'
Mason just ignores what you said. 'You would've at least made five sarcastic comments in the last two minutes if everything was fine. You forget how i can read you like a book.' He pauses. 'And you certainly wouldn't be hiding away from your own birthday party for most of the night. Especially when you always refuse to let me leave without helping you clean up.'
Shit
'Mase, i told you, I'm -'
'Cut the bullshit, Y/N.' He told you sternly, before continuing, 'I watched you blow out the candles. I saw that look you made after you made your wish, and you looked up at me for a split second. And that look you had on your face, as if you were going to start crying right there and then. You masked it quickly, but I saw it. I’m not going to stand here and pretend I didn’t see it.’
‘I don’t know what you’re-’
‘Yes you do,’ he interjects. ‘Because right about an hour ago I’m handing you a drink and the next thing I know, I see your face crumple like that again. And-’ he takes a deep breath before continuing. ‘And it fucking broke my heart.’
You stood there, stunned.
‘So, are you going to tell me what I did wrong?’ He asks.
‘You didn’t do-’
‘Because you’re my best friend,’ he reminds you. ‘And I feel like I have a right to know what I did that made you make that face.’
There’s a beat of silence, and he says, in a lower tone than before. ‘Because I would do anything to make sure I never see it again. It breaks my heart seeing you like that.’
Stood still, your gaze is fixed at the door speed the two of you.
‘Y/N.’ He calls out, sounding more desperate than you ever thought him capable of being.
And that does it. The tears you’ve been desperately holding back through every conversation with him you had, not only tonight, but since the day you realised that you were in love with him. You’ve reached the point where there was no return, and the person you want to run to the most is also the one you couldn’t possible bare to see you in this state.
The stretch of silence following your name from his lips feels endless. You feel like you’ve been standing in front of the door, with your face painfully scrunched in a vain attempt to stop the tears from falling, for an eternity. That is until it’s broken by your shuddering gasp for air.
‘Y/N.’ He says again. Only this time his voice has shifted, even thought the distance hasn’t changed, you can feel his voice everywhere now. It has penetrated the walls and filled every corner of the room. You realise this is the first time he’s seen you cry.
Well, no. He still can’t see you.
He can only hear you, which means there’s still time to fix things going from bad to worse.
‘C’mon princess, don’t cry sweetheart,’ he beckons. ‘Please. Just come out and we’ll fix whatever’s happening. I swear.’
Those nicknames, which he sometimes throws around fondly and always makes your chest tighten in joy every time you hear them. It feels worse now. It feels torturous and cruel to hear him casually call you things you wished he truly meant.
And that only makes you cry harder.
Oh how you wish things were different, and how you wished you were destined to be with him.
‘I-I’m begging you,’ his voice sounds strained, and you feel guilty for putting him in such an uncomfortable situation.
‘I’m fine,’ you manage. ‘I’m sorry. I’ll be okay in a sec.’
‘But you never cry,’ he says. Which was true, you never let him saw you raw emotions. You wanted him to think that you were fine and that you could handle it, until you couldn’t anymore.
‘I’m sorry,’ you whisper.
‘Stop apologising,’ he says firmly. ‘Now, can you please come out?’
‘I can’t.’
‘And why’s that?’
‘Because,’ you squeeze your eyes shut as more tears spill over. ‘You can’t see me like this. I don’t want it to change our friendship.’
‘Well what if I want it to?’ He counters.
‘What?!!’
‘What if I want it to affect our friendship?’ He sighs. ‘What if I want you to think you can come to me when you’re upset? Do you really think I’d push you away when you’re like this?’
You can’t get any words out. All you can do is let out a pathetic sob at the kindness of his words.
At my crying he stammers, ‘I’m sorry, did I say something wrong? I just meant-’
‘No!!’
‘No?’ He questions.
‘No,’ you can’t help but smile a little.
‘Well, look, I’m not going to force you to come out,’ he says. ‘If you truly want to be alone, I get that, and I’ll leave and you can come out whenever you’re ready.’
Good.
I think I can work with that - you thought.
‘But if the only reason you’re not coming out is because you’re afraid of how I’m going to react, then I’m the one who fucked up for making you think that you always need to be in a good mood around me,’ his voice softens. ‘I’ll leave you alone if you want, but please don’t try to push me away.’
Damn.
You almost left out a huff of laughter, because you know that no matter what you promised yourself, he always weakens your resolve. And it’s at this moment where you realise just how exhausted you are - how nearly two years of suppressing your feelings have been slowly eating away at you. And the weight of your misery becomes unbearable, and all you want is to leave the terrible ache in your chest behind.
More tears come running down your cheek, that you couldn’t seem to stop. You don’t bother wiping them away as you stare at yourself into the mirror. You see the hollowness of your eyes, the way you look pale in the dim bathroom light, and you know you can hardly handle the weight of your secret for much longer. Giving yourself an almost nod of understanding before reaching the door handle, unlocking the door and throwing common sense out of the window.
‘Princess?’ He asks. Your chest tightens at the sound of that stupid nickname again. It started off as a joke, Mason teasing you after you shared your love of fantasy books and fairy tales with him. And it stuck around, quickly becoming Mason’s favourite way to make you flustered while you always shoot him with an annoyed glare. You always told him you hated it, but after a while you began to carry it with a sense of pride. As much as it pained you to know he was only joking, it always made your heart contract in a way he was only capable of causing.
‘Promise me one thing?’ Your voice is unsteady from all the crying you’ve been doing.
‘Anything.’
‘Shut your eyes, will you?’
‘Why’s that?’
‘Not to brag or anything but I’m certain I’m one of the most ugliest criers out there. And I’m not sure if I can stand you see me like that,’ you do your best to joke. ‘Just for now, at least.’
‘You don’t realise how silly you sound, do you? But if that’s what makes you come out, then yeah sure.’ He says.
And with that, you pull the door handle down so you can open the door.
Mason’s perched at the very end of your bed, his hands resting on his lap. He’s facing you, and you’re relieved to see that his dud are still shut, as promised. You stand there for what feels like an endless amount of time, too stunned to move. But slowly, his hands move from his lap and palms his face up, beckoning you over.
It’s all the cue you need, and you step forward, placing your hands on his forearms, your grip is still shaky. Whilst his eyes are still closed, he engulfs you into a hug. You have hugged Mason plenty of times, more than you can count, but never with you crying into his arms. One hand rubs your back while the other gently caresses your hair, but the tenderness and kindness he’s showing only makes you cry harder.
‘Can I open my eyes?’ He murmurs. All you can manage is a quick nod against his chest. He tries to pull back from the hug so he can face you, but you figure that he cant see your tear stained face if it’s buried in his hoodie, so you remain firmly planted in the hug.
A few moments pass like this, both pressed impossibly close to each other and you can feel your heart rate begin to calm as your tears slowly subside. The exhaustion has saturated your body as you feel as though you can fall asleep on his chest before you heard him speak.
‘You’ll tell me what I did wrong, won’t you?’
‘I want to, but I can’t,’ you tell him.
‘Why?’ He doesn’t sound annoyed, his voice has a playful tone to it with a twinge of worry.
‘Because-’ you whisper. ‘Because you’ll hate me.’
‘Impossible,’ he says. ‘You’re one of my best friends, I don’t think I could hate you even if I wanted to.’
‘As much as I want to tell you why I gave you that look tonight,’ your voice is slightly muffled with your face buried in his hoodie. ‘I know it will ruin our friendship and I don’t think I can bare losing you.’
‘You’re not making any sense. I thought I was the one who upset you,’ he manages to pull away, untangling my arms from around his neck. He slowly rises from his perch, towering above me as he rests his hand on my shoulders. You can’t look at him though, so you lock your gaze onto the floor. ‘Seriously, Y/N, you know I won’t force you to do anything you don’t want to, but you’re starting to scare me.’ His confession makes your heart ache impossibly.
He brings his hand underneath your chin and slowly guides your face up to meet his. A few more tears escape your swollen eyelids, and he gently brushes them away. ‘I want to tell you,’ you avert your gaze, not being able to stand the intensity of his eyes on yours. ‘But I know how it’ll end. And I know you’ll resent me for it.’
‘Please don’t say that,’ he tries to meet your eyes. ‘There’s nothing that you could say to me right now that would make me even think about hating you, okay?’
‘But there is!’ You grip on to his forearms, relishing your closeness one last time. You know you’re going to be selfish you’ve ever been and ruin the most important thing in your life just to give yourself a moment of peace. ‘And I thought I was fine keeping it to myself, but I just can’t go on like this anymore.’
You stagger backwards, as you see the panicked look on his face. ‘I can’t eat or sleep,’ your fingers begin to nervously tangle themselves into your hair. ‘And I know you don’t deserve this, but I can feel myself going crazy and I know that I can’t keep this up.’
He slowly moves closer to you, his brow knotted in concern. ‘Keep what up?’
‘I can’t keep pretending that I’m not in love with you.’
There it is.
There’s no going back now.
He starts to say your name, but you cut him off quickly. ‘No, just let me finish,’ you bury your face in your hands, knowing damn well that you cannot possibly handle his reaction. You try your best to steady your breathing. ‘Because if I don’t do this now, it’ll just continue to eat away at me until I won’t even recognise myself.’
You take his silence as a cue to keep going. You remove your hands from your eyes but focus your attention on the floor. You eyes catch on a potted plant in the corner of the room by three window, and you keep your gaze focused on it as you utter your confession.
‘I thought it was just a little crush,’ your voice isn’t much louder than a whisper. ‘When we met a couple years ago. And then it was like one day I blinked and you and I had become best friends. I couldn’t remember a time when I was so happy.’
You’re crying now. You take another moment to gather your strength, and carry on, refusing to look up at him.
‘I thought us being friends would be enough, and for a while it was. I was fine loving you platonically, because I figured having you in my life as a friend would be better than not having you in my life at all. But my feelings never went away, they just continued to grow stronger and stronger and-’ you try to discreetly wipe your eyes. Your tears blurred your vision almost completely. ‘I knew you would never love me like I love you, because guys like you don’t date girls like me. The date models or influencers. The type of girl you brag to your friends about.’
‘I feel terrible because I’ve lied to you our entire friendship. I feel like this secret has just been festering inside of me and honestly I’ve been so miserable when I wake up everyday thinking this is it, this is the day you’ll find someone else and I’ll truly be nothing to you. But no matter how badly I try to protect myself from getting hurt in the end, I just can’t stay away from you.’ You let out a weak laugh.
You’re rambling now, you can feel it. You find it impossible to stop until he speaks. ‘What if I feel the same?’
You jerk your chin up to meet his eyes. He’s standing closer now, and you have to tilt your head back to maintain eye contact.
Your stubbornness got in the way. ‘No you don’t. You could never love me.’
It feels like time stops when he says, ‘who said that?’
You shake your head, and viciously swipe your hands under your eyes. ‘No, Mase. Don’t say things you don’t mean. I know we joke around a lot but I would never fuck around with your feelings like that.’ You can feel panic rising in your chest.
‘I’m-’ Mason tries to go on to say until you interrupt.
‘You don’t have to let me down gently.’
‘Please give me a chance to speak, will you?’ He grips your shoulders gently, placing his face close to yours. And then he goes on to saying something you would’ve never expected. ‘Could you just pump the breaks for a second so I can tell you that I’m in love with you too?’
You stood stunned for a while before you managed to come out with ‘what?’
‘You do realise that I’ve been crazy about you for years now, right? I just didn’t know where you stood so I never had the guts to ask you out,’ He lets out a breathy laugh and runs his hands through his hair. ‘Oh god if I had known that you liked me back even a little I would’ve said something! I–I just thought you never saw me like that,’ He trails off. He stops and turns to me suddenly. ‘Princess, I am so sorry. All this time you felt like you couldn’t be yourself around me, like you couldn’t just tell me how you felt.’
You’re still staring at him, dumbfounded. You’ve realized that you still haven’t stopped crying, much to your absolute humiliation. If what he’s saying is true, you think, then why on god’s green earth can’t you calm down? But at this point the panicked sobbing has taken a new shape, now strangely mixed with exhaustion, giddiness, and confusion. You attempt a smile, but you imagine it looks very off-putting, considering your emotional state.
His hand on your arm breaks you out of your thoughts. ‘Sorry,’ I furtively wipe your eyes. ‘I don’t know what’s wrong with me – I mean, I should be jumping up and down with joy, but,’ you release another shuddering breath. ‘I can’t seem to calm down.’
The look he gives you is one you’ve seen many times before, though you never knew how to describe it. Calling it a look of kindness or interest didn’t seem like it was enough to describe the depth of his stare, and it felt too far to call it a look of worry. Only now after these past few minutes have you understood what his gaze is implying. It was more than affection, it felt like love.
‘Hey,’ he murmurs. ‘It’s okay, you’ve been through quite a bit just now, baby.’
I laugh a little at that. ‘That’s a good way to sum it up.’
He smiles again, and your stomach does more than just flip, it somersaults and launches itself into a dive roll. And then he pulls you into his arms again, and though you can’t stop the tears leaving your eyes, you feel like you can at least control your breathing a bit more.
‘Now I know you have a tendency to overthink,’ he says after a moment or two. ‘But there can’t be any of that right now, alright? Don’t think about tomorrow or this new thing between us, alright?’
You pause, but relent with a small nod.
He continues. ‘I care about you like I always have, and my priority right now is to make sure you’re okay.’ His hand rubs reassuring circles on your back as he speaks. ‘It’s late now, and you must be exhausted after everything tonight.’
You let out a small hum of agreement. Now that he mentions it, you feel absolutely wiped out, and a dull pain has begun to take roots in your temples. Mason gently moves back, pushing a lock of hair behind your ear and taking in the sight of you in front of him. For what felt like the millionth time, you feel yourself becoming self-conscious. You know how red and swollen your face becomes after you’ve cried, and you’re willing to bet that the mascara running down your cheeks gives your features an added air of insanity.
‘How about you let me deal with some of the mess in the living room, while you wash your face and wind down a bit?’ he suggests.
‘Yeah,’ your breath still comes out a little shaky as you restate his commands. ‘No overthinking.’
He nods, satisfied with your answer. ‘And when I come back tomorrow, we’ll talk, and then you can let that brain of yours ask a hundred and one questions as it always does. But not until then,’ he finished with a smile.
You can feel your heart start to drop at his words
‘You’re not staying?’
The words are out before you can stop yourself. You know he doesn’t want you thinking about this new thing between us right now, but he has no idea how much overthinking you’ll do if he walks out that door. You know if he leaves, you’ll barely get a wink of sleep all night, wondering if our heated exchange was nothing more than a champagne-induced dream.
Mason looks at me with a smile. ‘Of course I can stay.’
‘Are you saying that because I asked, or because you actually want to?’ You shoot him an incredulous look
‘Let me tell you something, princess,’ he stares deeply into your eyes, refusing to let your gaze slip from his. ‘I’ve never, never left your side willingly.’
His words cause your breath to hitch and for your heart to constrict almost painfully, but you refrain from grabbing the skin over your chest, from making sure that your heart is, in fact, still beating.
‘I wanted you to know that you don’t owe me anything right now, and that we’re still – we’re still us,’ he says. ‘I didn’t want you to feel weird if I stayed the night, that’s all.’
You let out a soft breath. ‘Thank you, Mase,’ you whisper. ‘I trust you, you know that I do.’
‘Good,’ he replies. ‘That’s a relief because I honestly didn’t feel comfortable leaving my girl alone right now.’
You have to physically hold yourself back from grinning at his words. My girl. The thought of those two words, and all they could possibly imply, made me feel light-headed. All you can do is nod your head in agreement.
He gently brushes some hair behind your shoulders, giving you a soft grin. ‘So how about you get ready for bed, and I’ll grab a T-shirt from my car and put away the stuff in the living room. I’ll be back in a few minutes, alright?’
‘Okay, I think I can manage washing my face before I pass out,’ you say jokingly.
Mason chuckles as he walks out of the room. ‘That’s my girl.’
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jerreeeeeee · 3 days
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i don't think taako's voice is really all that high most of the time. it's higher than justin's normal voice a little, but idk, the defining quality of it isn't its pitch to me, there's something else that i don't really have the words for. but anyway i do notice that his voice gets lower and less exaggerated when he's being serious. which is interesting bc it sort of implies that the usual "taako voice" is something he puts on.
i don't really think of taako as a habitual performer. his charisma modifier is a -1, he's not this ultra smooth charming actor, and although he does tend to hide behind humor and is slow to build connections, he's also very frank with what he's about and what he wants. he goes on an entire tirade about wanting to talk about his feelings (he's multidimensional!), he never acts embarrassed or hesitant about big moments of vulnerability and caring for others (arms outstretched, "i'm not going fucking anywhere," admitting a deep fear to kravitz on their first date, spilling his tragic backstory to angus, not to mention several serious moments with lup) (and not all of these can be chalked up to "forgotten connections," either. he does have a foundation of growth with magnus and merle, even forgotten, and his conversations with lup are of course all with memories intact, but he does not have that with kravitz and angus). he's just slow to reveal all of his hidden depths, because of (understandable) trust issues. but all in all he's not nearly as closed off as i think fandom tends to portray him (which is not to say he's open, either), nor is he someone who wears a lot of masks and obscures himself. i don't think he hides his "true self."
sizzle it up was successful because of his intelligence, not his charisma. he's a natural teacher who's knowledgeable and passionate, and that was what made the show great, not his personality or performance (though i don't think those were bad. just not the primary appeal of the show. the only fan we see is ren, and she loved sizzle it up because it inspired her and taught her to cook, not because she thought taako was awesome or whatever). bc that's the thing, he's not a performer, but he is extremely adaptable. so when he's set up with a stagecoach and a show lined up, sure, he'll have a TV persona, he'll learn to be charming, he'll learn to be showy, when he's on stage. when he gets famous, he learns to like being famous, but i don't think it was really a dream of his before then. or at least not in the way people think of it. i don't think he ever wanted to be a celebrity as much as a celebrity chef or celebrity wizard. he doesn't care if people think he's pretty. he doesn't want people to adore him (before the voidfish, anyway. afterwards is a different story. there's a void where love used to be that he's desperate to fill, and adoration almost feels like it works). really what he wants is for people to appreciate his skill and intelligence and depth (and he's also very afraid of actually displaying those things. he's multidimensional).
but most of the time, when he's not literally performing for an audience, i just don't think he's putting on a show, desperate for people to like him and think he's charming. he'll do what he needs to do, say what he needs to say, be who he needs to be in any given circumstance, with strangers and antagonists, but he also drops the act when it's not necessary. or at least his performance is subtler. he performs stupidity, he performs nonchalance, he makes efforts to be funny (because he is always funny, but that's something you have to work for and always be thinking about, even when the humor is dry), he carefully does just enough to be useful, but not enough to raise expectations. he's very aware of how other people view him, but he's also perfectly okay with people thinking negatively about him—as long as they're the negative traits he wants people to see. but, he only does all those things in the beginning of the show; after a little while with magnus and merle, after a little while with the bob, he drops the act. so i guess that's the difference to me. he's adaptable out of necessity, it doesn't bleed into his entire life. i don't even really think i'd qualify it as a performance. it's more of an invisibility. he's not performing charisma to get people to like him, he's trying to lay low. but then when he actually wants people to like him, he's himself, fairly unapologetically. with the people who matter, lup, magnus and merle, kravitz, the other bob members, the other ipre crew, he's pretty comfortable with himself.
one last interesting point is that while he doesn’t seem to hesitate when it comes to actions, he does shy away from verbal displays of affection, trust, vulnerability. and the best two scenes to show that play out almost exactly the same: lup’s best day ever dinner, and dropping his disguise self with kravitz. in each, taako does something meaningful for both npcs, who then verbalize their affection for him, which taako immediately deflects with a joke.
taako drops his disguise spell for kravitz, totally honest with him, (although… i don’t tend to think the beauty sacrifice was as meaningful to taako as fandom tends to portray, i think most of his vanity is an exaggeration he intentionally cultivates, but still, it’s a vulnerable moment, he clearly cares what kravitz thinks), and kravitz tells him he loves him. to which taako replies with a joke. he does not return the words.
taako doesn’t hesitate to construct the best day ever for lup, never even questions why she’d ask. he puts it all together, cooks for her, shows her he knows her, he loves her—and then when she bears her heart to him, tells him he is her heart, all he says is, “i know,” and pulls out a bottle of vodka. of course lup knows he loves her, the whole day was an elaborate demonstration of it, but he doesn’t say anything. to be fair, it’s not exactly a typical interaction between them, taako is textually scared shitless, lup did just tell him she’s going to turn herself into an undead abomination, so he’s not exactly at his best here. but anyway.
i don’t really have anything to add to this observation, it’s just very consistent and interesting to me. taako is fairly comfortable with grand gestures, but sidesteps around words. which ties in perfectly with his identity as a chef, to me. cooking is an action, work, intention, cooking for people is an act of love, an act of connection, an act of caring, and taako’s character doesn’t fit the bill for that—except, he kinda really does.
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snoozbin · 1 day
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kiss ban gn!reader x sungho ・ drabble college au fluff established relationship ・ cw kissing hickeys (NOT SEXUAL !!!!!) swearing ! wc 538
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sungho is the perfect boyfriend you could ever ask for.
from his jaw-dropping looks to his heart-warming personality, he always made you smile and appreciate your relationship. but—
he has a habit, a very up-and-close habit. kissing. or as he sees it "showing his love to someone he loves" this is mainly nice as everyone likes physical touch from their significant other, but this time it's bad.
very bad.
hearts pounded as you locked lips with sungho, his plump lips glossed with a thin layer of spit as the two of you were making out. his slender fingers playing with the ends of your shirt. kissing was a very normal thing to do every day as you couldn't help but melt into a puddle every time sungho pouted at you. you disconnected with sungho and stared into his eyes, such loving and doting eyes that could make you fall in love with him all over again. 
suddenly you feel his lips against your neck, giving you chast kisses down to your collarbone. "we have to go soon, sunggg.." you huffed out as you watched him continue to kiss you. "just give me a sec, wanna give you more kisses.." 
his lips sucked down on your neck. you didn't mind this as you were in the moment. 
soon after the kisses were done and you were ready to go to college that's when you realized what happened. "sungho. what did you do to my neck??" you froze, only looking at the mirror in front of you. "i didn't know it was gonna bruise up like that.." he was referring to a hickey on your neck. 
park sungho just gave you a hickey... ! when you were about to campus.
"i'm dead. i'm fucking dead sungho." you muttered, surprisingly sungho caught what you said. "maybe just cover up? or maybe put makeup on it?.." he advised you, but you frowned. sungho's hands clasped onto yours as his eyes looked into yours, showing pure empathy and anxiousness. "y'know i didn't mean to do this to you, right? i'm sorry babe, i just got too into it." he apologized. 
a sigh fell off your lips as you looked back at sungho. "it's fine, uhm, i can just wear a sweater." sungho nodded at your response, feeling bad about the hickey on your neck. "you better not feel bad right now sung, it's just a silly hickey. 'ts isn't gonna kill me!" you chuckle while zipping your sweater up. 
sungho didn't say a word and placed his arms around your waist, pulling you into his embrace. "i'm just so sorry." he whispered into your ear. "i know you are, and it's okay!!" you reassured him. 
your hands gently picked up your bags and headed straight to the door. "you better not be sad when i come back sung!!" "i won't, okay?" you nodded to his response and opened the door. 
"just so you know though —"
"you're on a kissing ban, till this thing goes away." sungho's eyes widened as you said that with a smile. "NOOOOO" sungho whined, a pout forming on his lips. "i might give you a kiss if you at least help get rid of the hickey." you giggled. 
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🐰 : sorry if this is bad. I'm trying to get into the groove of writing (TT)
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hello! I am the person who requested that reader with a cat who likes the boys a lot if u remember that request.
may I request (if ur not uncomfortable with it) some period comfort with an afab!reader (they/them pls) just taking care and helping reader with their period? if it's not too much can u also include reader sleeping a lot and craving lots of food (typical ik) and how reader just gets mad rlly easily.
characters: bi-han, syzoth, shang tsung, kenshi, raiden and liu kang
thank u and have a good day :) (smiling through the pain)
author note: I'm super late, but I suppose it's better than never. Hope you'll like these! Link to the cat post
Kenshi Takahashi: -He…He can smell when you are on your period. -Actually Kenshi can even tell when it is coming so he is always ready with food when it finally comes. -He tries to keep your pelvis warm and treat you softly since your body gets sore way more easily. -Kenshi goes a bit insane when you're ovulating, so now he is more calm and soft. -He'll try to make your mean comments slide, but it is hard for him, so it's better not to exaggerate, or Kenshi will snap back.
Raiden: -Really sweet and understand your needs. -But Raiden won't be a sticky boyfriend. He has work to do and won't take a day off. -When he finally understands how this period works for you, he will be prepared for the next one. -Your fave food? Check. Warm beverages? Check. Cover and 3 different kinds of movies to match your current mood? Check. -When Raiden gets home tho he is all for you. He likes to put you in his arms and draw circles on your hand, waiting for you to fall asleep on his chest. -Mean words are nothing to him. A king of taking the hit and making it slide off him.
Liu Kang: -"You bastard! Couldn't you erase menstruation while creating this world?" You whine into his arms, cramps making you curl in his body.
"Would you rather lay eggs, dear one?" Liu Kang replies, with a smile on his face, forefinger lifting your chin up to make you look into his brilliant eyes.
"You are just a meanie." You snap back, pushing his face away from yours, making a laughter blossom in his throat. -He tries not to make you eat too much junk food, but he'll back off when you look at him with fury in your eyes. -His body is better than any cover.
Bi-Han: -I'm sorry, but he would be pretty cold. -He was raised in a way that even if you were dying, you should take care of yourself without the help of anybody, so at max, he'll send your way a doctor. -Bi-Han has to work A LOT on being a normal human. He really doesn't know how to work around normal feelings that are outside his field of work. -And the future grandmaster lessons he has been given as a kid never focused on helping his partner out. It is already much that he decided who to be with. -Bi-Han probably knows very little about how menstruation works, mostly because they taught him not to care about other people and just think about how to be the perfect Lin Kuei's leader. -First work on making him act as a decent human, then Bi-Han will even make you a special tea to make your cramps less painful. -And if you look particularly pitiful he may snuck junk food too…
Syzoth: -The first time he saw you losing blood, he panicked because "Why are you losing blood?!?!" -After you explain how things work, Syzoth will let out a breath of relief. -Surprisingly, he understands pretty well that losing blood is a pain, so he doesn't mind following your order like a butler. -Syzoth is gonna snuggle under the covers with you, btw. -Not used to you being mean tho, even if he understands you aren't fine, he still takes those words personally.
Shang Tsung: -Actually, he'd make a potion to make your cramps fade. -But he doesn't do anything for nothing…are you ready to try his next experiments? Maybe the potion isn't as safe as he says. -Shang Tsung satisfies your cravings, but don't nag too much, or he'll get annoyed. -Also, don't be mean, or he will snap back, then you'll start to cry, and actually Shang Tsung has a weakness: your tears. Then he'll have to try to make you stop, but sadly, another mean word slips…it's an endless cycle that makes him think just "Hope this will end soon."
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ghyulia · 1 day
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𝗢𝗯𝗲𝘆 𝗠𝗲 𝗕𝗿𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝘀! 𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗙𝗶𝗻𝗱 𝗢𝘂𝘁 𝗧𝗵𝗲𝘆’𝗿𝗲 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗧𝘆𝗽𝗲 𝗽𝟮!
p1 | p2
‹𝟹 ft. Satan & Beelzebub
sorry for any grammar mistakes!!
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𝗦𝗮𝘁𝗮𝗻
𐙚 . He's pretty surprised. Satan knows that he's pretty attractive, but he doesn't have the best of qualities. He genuinely thinks you would fare better with someone who isn't as.. short-fused as him. He appreciates your feelings, of course! He's so madly in love with you
𐙚. Satan resolves not to mention it or make an appearance at the moment as quietly makes his way back to his room. He doesn't think you noticed him.
𐙚. Little did he know, you managed to catch a glimpse of a blonde head swiftly disappearing from behind the door. You knew he heard you and chose not to say anything or make himself known. This threw you for a loop. Did he like you? Did he try to flee the scene in hopes that you wouldn't notice him because he didn't feel that way about you?! All of these thoughts were weighing you down.
𐙚. After a few hours, you finally decided to man up and pay him a visit. It wasn't unusual for you to visit him at this time, since you both usually liked to read while occasionally talking about events that transpired through the day.
𐙚. You knock twice. "Satan?"
"Oh, (Name)." "Come in."
You warily open the door, all your confidence from a few minutes ago dissipating. It's now or never, anyway. You swallow your fear.
"How was your day?" You say. "It was pretty normal. Remember that book from the human world that piqued my interest? It finally came in. I was pretty excited to read it, but I thought it might be better to wait for you. I got a little impatient and read the first few pages, though...I hope that's fine." "Hey, (Name), you seem really tense. Is everything all right?" Satan points out.
"Huh? ..Oh yeah. I'm good..I'm super excited to read the book, too!" You force out. He really is acting like he didn't hear what you said. You were starting to get frustrated, and Satan could notice it too.
"Seriously, (Name). What's up with you?" Satan inquires, confusion written all over his face. His beautiful face. That stupid face!! That face to the body of a stupid demon who's acting like he didn't stupidly hear your confession of love (it wasn't even really a confession..)! That tipped you over the edge.
"What's up with me is that I said you were my type! You were there! You were there....and now you're pretending not to have heard me! That obviously means you don't like me, or at least not enough to mention it! It makes me feel so stupid, Satan. So, so unbelievably stupid. And I know it's not your fault, but sometimes I feel like what we do is pretty intimate, you know?! I mean when we read in your room I'm basically on top of you. A guy who doesn't like me should at least have the decency to stop me from making a fool out of myself. He should push me off him! I really like you, but you obviously don't reciprocate, so you should at least say somet-"
Your ramble is abruptly halted with a short, sweet peck on your cheek. You tilt your head a little to face the Cynical Fourth born, whose ears are fully crimson.
"Y-You.."
"(Name), I'm sorry. I didn't... really know how to bring it up. I told myself that I would later, after we got comfortable. Of course I'm into you. Who wouldn't be? You're amazing, funny, and kind, and you never fail to bring a smile to my face. I'm always quick to anger, as you know..but around you, I always find myself striving to be a better person. You keep me in check. I'm not just into you... I know for a fact that.. ᵗʰᵃᵗ ⁱ..ˡᵒᵛᵉ ʸᵒᵘ." He barely mumbles out the last part. Your smile grows wider and wider, before you all but pounce on the demon.
"I guess that would make us the perfect pair because I feel the exact way about you, 'Tan!"
Satan's smile is the widest you've ever seen. He doesn't know what the future has in store for him, but he knows that as long as you are by his side, there will be nothing he can't overcome.
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𝗕𝗲𝗲𝗹𝘇𝗲𝗯𝘂𝗯
𖦹 He doesn't understand. He's your ideal type of what? He doesn't get it, so he just ignores the statement for a while and continues doing his daily activities.
𖦹 A few hours later, the thought of what you said resurfaces, and while filming his new DevilTube workout video with Asmodeus, Beel decides to ask what it means to be someone's "Ideal type." Once Asmo explains what it means and he finally understands and fully processes what you meant by the statement, he goes fully red. He's so embarrassed he didn't get that earlier. But at the same time, he's ecstatic. You're his type too!
𖦹 Poor guy can't even focus on his workout video. He wraps it up as quickly as possible, leaving Asmo with the editing, and makes a beeline for your room. He stops halfway.
𖦹 He's sweating like a pig...It would probably be best to freshen up before confronting you about what you said. He makes a mad dash to the shower, freshens up quickly, and then hastily makes his way to your room.
"(Name)? You in there?"
"Yeah! Come in, the door is unlocked." Your voice was muffled. "Sorry, I'm looking for a potions book Solomon lent to me. What's up? Asmo was texting the group chat about how you abandoned your "Deviltuber Duties"..or something," You giggled, still not facing him.
"Earlier..You said I was your ideal type. I didn't know what it meant, so I ignored it, but I know what it means now.." Beel confesses.
You freeze. "You heard that?!" You quickly turn around. You felt like all the blood you had in your human body was rushing straight to your face. Your eyes meet his, and you finally realize that the 6'4 demon's face is also decorated in a deep shade of red. You guys are practically matching at this point!
"(Name)... You should probably know that you're my type too. You've always accepted me and my brothers. You still treated Belphie with kindness even after the rough start you two had. I admired that about you. I'm okay with sharing my food if it's you. I've always thought you were amazing ever since the day you stood up for me and Luke. You didn't waver in front of Lucifer, who can be really scary at times...and it made me feel so warm. My feelings only grew from there."
You tear up a little. "Beel, you're so amazing. I don't know what I did to deserve someone like you."
"I think it's the other way around, (Name)." Beel leaves a chaste kiss on your lips and engulfs you in a warm hug.
The Gluttonous seventh-born knows he'll continue to treasure you forever. Beelzebub had never paid any mind to the sun at first because it never shined in the Devildom, but you changed that. You exuded light and radiance from the moment he met you. You were the sun. His sun. He's just so happy that he gets to be the one closest to your heart. You smile and indulge in his embrace, the potions book long forgotten.
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a/n: ahhh it's done!! sorry for the wait omg :(( I'm thinking of what to write ab next but I hope ygs enjoyed this one! oh if anyone has any ideas on what I shld write abt next pleaseee lmk haha :)
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borathae · 2 days
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↳ Index [Chapter 01 - Besuch]
• Besuch (German; noun: visit)
Focus on Pairing: Taehyung x f.Reader
Warnings: so many fluffy sweet moments, talks about polyamory & sexuality, Tae suffers from PTSD, but he gets so much comfort, Yoongi is a nervous cutie, Jungkook is so sweet <3
Wordcount: 14.5k
a/n: OMFG BESTIES WE'RE FINALLY BACK IN BUSINESS! I'M SO HAPPY TO BE BACK WITH A LIL STORY FOR YOU GAAAH 💙
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“Okay. Are you ready?”
“I am.”
“Me too.”
“Where’s Yoongi?”
“He said that he’ll be here soon.”
“I could call him.”
The door opens.
“I’m sorry I’m late, I couldn’t get the button to close”, Yoongi says, running to get to you and the others. You are busy closing the safety circle while the others are waiting on your floor surrounded by your travel bags.
“Why are you dressed like this?” Taehyung asks, following Yoongi with his eyes.
Yoongi looks down at his own body. He is wearing a black suit with a small white boutonniere in his front pocket.
“What’s wrong with my outfit?” he asks with a pout, “you’re wearing a suit too.” 
Taehyung, dressed in an emerald green suit, shrugs his shoulders.
“It is just that these are my normal clothes, but you look as if you stumbled out of the wrong movie.”
“Why? What’s wrong with my clothes?” Yoongi whines, “I’m meeting her grandma. Can’t I dress up for that?”
You and the others laugh fondly. 
“Stop laughing, you brats”, he hisses, crossing his arms in front of his chest.  
“I’m just laughing because you’re so cute, my love”, you tell him, sitting down cross legged and patting the spot next to you, “sit down.”
Yoongi follows, tugging and pulling at his clothes insecurely. He can’t even look at your eyes because he feels so insecure in them all of a sudden. 
You lean in and give him a smooch on his cheek, “you look so handsome.” 
Yoongi blushes, “thanks”, he mumbles.
“I also think that you’re handsome, hyungie”, Jungkook says. He is dressed in a fancy shirt and slacks and has his hair in a neat half-updo.
“Thanks”, Yoongi says.
“I still think that you look peculiar”, Taehyung teases.
“Tae, stop that”, you say, hitting his leg gently.
“Fine. I won’t say anything again”, Taehyung gives up and snickers.
“You’re a brat”, Yoongi says.
“Can we start now?” you ask, looking between him and Taehyung fondly. 
“Yes, of course”, Taehyung says and takes your hand. Next he takes Jungkook’s hand, holding it tightly.
“I guess. It’s so mean, I dressed up for the occasion and I get made fun of”, Yoongi murmurs with a pout as he takes your and Jungkook’s hands.
“I wasn’t making fun-”
“Hush, you guys. Focus. I need to channel your powers and I can’t concentrate when you talk”, you stop them in a chuckle. 
The two bickering vampires stop, looking at you with the most innocent of eyes. 
“Now”, you begin, “close your eyes and relax. It’ll tingle a little.”
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The next time you open your eyes again, the scent of pine and wild herbs tickles your noses.
The ground beneath your feet crunches like small, angular stones. You run your eyes over your surroundings. Your lovers are beside you, looking around with awe in their eyes.
A high, dense forest surrounds you. The call of a blackbird echoes high above your heads and the humming of thousands of insects hangs in the air.
“Remarkable”, Taehyung gets out under his breath.
“Yeah right”, Jungkook whispers.
You find yourselves on a narrow gravel road. The road is just wide enough for one car and on the parts where no tires run along, high grasses and forest flowers grow. They tickle your legs as you stand in them. It is a nice sensation.
You know this road. Behind your backs, it leads into denser forests and high mountain paths. In front of your eyes, it will bring you to your grandmother’s house. You took this path a hundred times when you were younger. You will always find your way on it.
“Are we right here? Where are we? It looked different the last time we were here”, Jungkook asks.
“Yes, we’re right. It’s just not the back entrance”, you assure him, “come, follow me. I know the way”, you say and shoulder your bag, taking confident steps into the correct direction.
The three vampires lift their own bags and follow you with their eyes sparkling in awe. At least those of Taehyung and Jungkook, Yoongi’s eyes are glued to the ground. 
“I can’t believe that you truly managed to get us here”, Taehyung says, following a squirrel with his eyes as it escapes through the trees, “a squirrel! Right above our heads!”
“Where?” Jungkook gasps.
“There. Right there”, Taehyung shows him and after some intense searching, Jungkook finally finds it.
“Wow a squirrel! So cute!” he exclaims in a terribly cute voice. He and Taehyung share giggles and hold hands, swinging them back and forth happily.
You hold hands with Yoongi, who has been worryingly quiet until now.
“My love?” you call his attention with a soft pull at his hand.
His head snaps to you, “mhm?” his eyes are widened.
“Are you okay? You’re really quiet.”
“I’m okay.”
“Are you sure?”
He nods his head, “nervous”, he confesses and looks away.
“You’re nervous?”
He nods his head, rubbing the side of his neck.
“I never really did the whole, uhm, meeting my partner’s family and stuff before. Uh, yeah, it’s new to me. Scary, uh, yeah.”
“Aww my love, don’t be nervous. My grandma will love you so much.”
“Yeah, uhm”, he lowers his head shyly.
“I’m serious, love. She told me that she saw glimpses of you in my memories and that she can see how well you treat me”, you assure him, hugging his arm, “don’t worry, she’ll look at you and see a kind, sweet and very loveable person. Yeah?”
He nods his head and glances at you. He squeezes your hand just once and leans in to kiss your cheek.
“Thank you”, he whispers.
“I’m only saying the truth”, you say and pull Jungkook and Taehyung closer by holding Taehyung’s hand, “as a matter of fact, she’ll love all of you. Oh, you guys”, you begin skipping in happiness, “I’m so, so happy to be back and to see my grandma again and to introduce her to you.”
“I’m really happy too. I can’t wait to see grandma again”, Jungkook says, watching you with sparkling eyes. You are so happy. He likes that you are.
“I am very excited as well, my darling. I cannot wait to try her raspberry pie.”
“Yes, god you really can’t”, you say and wiggle your shoulders, “it’s so, so yummy.”
Another squirrel scurries past you, crossing the narrow gravel road in small jumps. Jungkook giggles.
“It’s so cute.”
“It truly is”, Taehyung says, “however, I cannot find an explanation as to why there are animals and insects living here. Isn’t this a realm for the souls of deceased witches and warlocks? How come there is other form of life in this realm?”
You all look at Yoongi for an answer.
“What?”
“Why are there animals and insects here?”
“It’s just the way it is. I don’t know.”
“But didn’t Namjoon create this realm? Shouldn’t he have talked to you about his plans for it?”
“He did. I don’t know, it’s been too long. Maybe it’s because he loved plants and animals back then. I don’t know, sorry I’m nervous”, Yoongi says, ending his rant by exhaling loudly and blinking his eyes at you.
You give his hand an encouraging squeeze.
“It’s okay, love. Thank you for telling us.”
“Okay, okay I apologise for asking”, Taehyung says and reaches past you to caress Yoongi’s arm, “don’t be nervous, hyung. I am sure that you will be welcomed splendidly. If there is someone who should be nervous, it should be me.”
“Don’t say that, Tae. She’ll love you as well”, you insist.
“Yes, well”, Taehyung lets out a nervous chuckle, “she saw how wonderfully Yoongi treated you, so I am sure that she must have seen how awfully I acted.”
“Even if she did, that means she also saw how much you changed for the better. Don’t worry my darling, she will love you just as much as she’ll love Yoongi and Kookie.”
“Okay, okay”, Taehyung says and grins shyly, “thank you for saying this.”
You hug his arm against you and give it a little kiss.
“Of course, my sweetest”, you say and straighten up, “now let’s go. I can’t wait to see her again. Oh, I’m so happy. Do you guys think that she can feel that we are coming?”
“I am certain that she could sense it.”
“Yes, I get the feeling as well”, Jungkook assures you, while Yoongi is still lost in his nervous thoughts.
The walk to your grandmother’s cottage is a long one, but a terribly beautiful one. Being in nature is truly the best thing one can be. The long grasses and colourful flowers brush against your legs as you wander. The trees sway in the warm breeze and the sun shines through the canopy and makes light dance all around you.
“Did you know that there is a word in Japanese which describes the light shining through leaves?” Taehyung asks.
“No, I didn’t”, Jungkook says to which you agree with a shake of your head.
Yoongi seems to know already, because he doesn’t react. Or perhaps he is currently completely dissociated in nervousness. That would explain why he is staring into the distance with dazed eyes.
“Indeed there is”, Taehyung says, “komorebi. It is a beautiful word and I would say that it is rather fitting for such a beautiful view.”
“Yes”, you agree, letting your eyes follow the light. It is as if it was in a dance with the shadow, creating ever changing paintings, “yes I agree. Komorebi. I have to remember this word.”
“Thank you for telling us. I learned something new”, Jungkook says, painting great happiness onto Taehyung’s features.
The cottage is within reach. You can see the cozy house and the colourful, loved garden surrounding it. The rather unwelcome wooden stake fence doesn’t greet you this time around. A normal wooden fence stands in its stead. There are high wooden pillars on each side of the road and a wooden arch on which roses climb up and bloom. The gates are currently open, inviting you inside.
“It’s so peculiar not to see grandma’s staked fence”, you say.
“But it was there the last time we visited her, right?” Jungkook makes sure.
You nod your head, “it must be because we accidentally switched from my memories to this world. Remember? There were no stakes when we left the realm again, but because we were too preoccupied with our emotions, we didn’t really notice it.”
“Yes, right. Right, now that you mention it, I didn’t see any stakes when we left. So that means that we’re right, ___. You actually took us to the safe realm where no vampires are present.”
Jungkook breaks away from Taehyung and gets in front of you and the others. You all come to a stop. He steps closer and puts his hand on the chests of Taehyung and Yoongi. While Taehyung smiles at him, Yoongi seems to come back to reality with the touch. He blinks rapidly, gawking at Jungkook.
The latter smiles and bounces on the spot.
“You’re human”, he says, “you guys are human. We’re all human again”, he says and touches his own chest, “my pulse is back. Wow!”
Taehyung and Yoongi touch their chests and while Taehyung seems marvelled by it, Yoongi exhales shakily, blinking away the emotion in his eyes. He tightens his fingers around the fabric of his shirt, furrowing his brows.
“Oh how fascinating”, Taehyung gasps, looking at you, “darling, I can feel my heart beat.”
“I know”, you say, touching him gently, “I can feel it too, Tae.”
Taehyung smiles and places his hand over yours, pulling you closer this way, “sweetest”, he whispers and kisses you. It is a nice revelation that his first instinct upon being human again, is to kiss you. You kiss him back with a racing heart and in return, you can feel his heart race in his chest. Oh, how good it feels to kiss him.
By the time you pull back for air, you are just a little dizzy. He smiles at you, squeezing your hand gently. You retort his smile.
Jungkook’s giggles make both of you turn into his direction. He is giggling at Yoongi, while the latter is looking into Jungkook’s face. Their hands are on each other’s chests, feeling the other’s heartbeat.
“I can count the beats, hyungie”, Jungkook says, “your pulse is real.”
“Yeah, I know”, Yoongi answers him.
“It’s beating so fast.”
“Yeah, I know…”
You join their sides, caressing their arms.
Jungkook pulls you into a group hug instantly, smothering you between his body and Yoongi’s.
“Oh? Okay”, you accept your fate with giggles, which only grow when you can feel Taehyung join the group hug as well.
“We are human again”, Jungkook says and begins jumping in a circle. You join him soon even if Yoongi whines about it. It’s just way too exciting to be with each other.
“Honeybee!” someone calling your nickname breaks the group hug. The boys release you, watching with curious eyes as a couple seem to hurry to you. They are dressed in flowy summer clothes and seem to be in their forties. Jungkook is smiling, waving his hand.
“Grandma! Hello!” he calls out, but you can’t hear him anymore.
Your grandfather is next to your grandmother. Safe and sound. And alive. He is actually alive.
“Grandpa?!” you gasp, “you- oh”, you stop talking to instead run to them.
They welcome you with open arms, engulfing you in the kind of hug only loving grandparents can give. Despite promising yourself not to cry, you still do. You went so many years without them and to see both of them again, well and alive, overwhelms you in the best way possible.
“You’re alive! Grandpa, you’re alive!”
“Hello my little forest strider, how have you been?”
“Oh grandpa, I missed you so much”, you choke out and sob into his chest.
“Mhm, my girl”, he says and pulls you closer.
You break away after a few moments of emotional hugging, eyes switching between your grandparents’ faces.
“You guys are so young and, and you’re both here. I don’t understand. How can you be here?”
“This is a peaceful world. A good world. I am here because Agatha wanted me to be here.”
“And you are real? You are truly real?”
“I am”, your grandfather smiles and tugs your grandmother closer, “she just couldn’t say goodbye to me, could she?”
“How could I, Harald? I need to have someone I can annoy”, she jokes, which makes him laugh and kiss her cheek. She takes your hand afterwards, “there is a way to make sure that your loved ones will find peace in this world even if they aren’t born witches.”
“There is?”
“Yes, yes there is, but I will tell you later. My boys, welcome”, she says and turns to your three boys with open arms, “I’m Agatha, but you can call me grandma as well. Jungkook my dear, welcome back.”
“I’m so happy to be back, grandma”, he says, bowing his head.
She however tugs him into a hug, forcing a squeak out of him as he stumbles into her loving embrace. He is so much taller than her, lowering himself for her comfort.
“Welcome back, my boy. How have you been?”
“Good, really good. I missed you.”
They break the hug, but she keeps holding his hands.
“It’s so nice to have you back for a happy occasion”, she says to which he agrees with an enthusiastic nod.
Afterwards he turns to your grandfather, giving him a tight handshake.
“It is so nice to meet you. I’m Jungkook.”
“Agatha already told me a lot about you. It’s good to finally put a face to the stories”, he says and grabs his upper arm, “you’re a strong one. I can feel it. Are those tattoos?”
“Oh, uhm…” Jungkook blushes, “yes, I guess they are.”
“Aha, I see. How far up do they go?” he asks, trying to tug Jungkook’s shirt further up his arm.
Jungkook laughs nervously, glancing at you as a call for help. But before you can save him from your grandfather’s nosy, yet kindly meant, hands, your grandmother does.
“Harald, don’t be nosy. Dear god”, your grandmother swipes his hand away, turning her attention to Yoongi next.
“You must be Yoongi.”
“I am”, he croaks out, “sorry”, he says and bows deeply, clearing his throat as he does, “nice to meet you and thank you so much for housing us”, he says and bows at your grandfather as well.
“I’m happy to have you, my dear”, she says and gives his arm a soft caress.
“Agatha told me that you enjoy woodworking. I was a carpenter in my time”, your grandfather says and takes both his hands to inspect them, “mhm good worker hands. They don’t fit your face.”
“Uh? Thank you, yeah, uhm.”
Your grandmother rolls her eyes at him because he is being nosy again.
“___ told me that you were a carpenter. Yeah, uhm”, Yoongi pulls his hands out of your grandfather’s hold and scratches his own ear shyly, “I think woodworking is good. Yeah”, he mumbles and clears his throat again.
Your grandfather smiles. Yoongi is shy. Just as Agatha had told him.
Taehyung bows at both of your grandparents as well, “I am Taehyung. It is truly wonderful to finally meet the people who are so utterly important to ___.”
“We could say the same about you”, she says and studies him from head to toe. There is just the slightest, smallest, faintest mistrust in them. 
“I, uhm”, Taehyung begins fumbling in his bag, “I have something for you”, he says and pulls out a box.
Your grandmother accepts it, opening it. 
“Oh? Seeds?”
“Yes, indeed. They are seeds from our garden. ___ told me that she inherited her enjoyment for gardening from you and I thought that growing seeds from our garden in your own could be a special way to connect our families.”
Your grandmother exchanges a look with your grandfather. They smile, reaching out for a warm caress to Taehyung’s arms.
“Thank you, boy. We will cherish them.”
“This is such a wonderful gift, thank you my dear”, your grandmother says and points at the house, “come, I bet you must be really exhausted from the journey.”
“Not really. ___ did a really good job at sending us here”, Jungkook says and looks around, “it looks a lot nicer here than last time.”
“That’s because you entered this realm willingly and not accidentally. That is also why your heartbeats feel so real and why you can take bags with you. Because your bodies are actually here.”
“Woah, that’s wild to me. Did you know that, hyung?”
Yoongi shakes his head, “no, I’m sorry. I don’t know a lot about this world”, he murmurs shyly.
“I see. That’s okay, but you seem to know a lot, grandma.”
“Oh? Oh no”, she laughs, “I know enough to know that this world is safe, but that it will also be punishing to people who aren’t dead yet.”
“What do you mean? Are we in danger?”
“Only if you die in here. You will be lost forever, which is not a nice fate to have.”
“Oh god. You guys gotta be extra careful from now on. Okay?” you tell your three boys.
“We will, don’t worry”, Jungkook assures you to which the others agree.
“I’m sure nothing will happen”, your grandfather says and places his arm over your grandmother’s shoulder, “are you hungry? We were just about to start dinner when Agatha felt you enter this realm.”
“Dinner sounds lovely, Harald?” Taehyung says, “please forgive me if I got your name wrong.”
“You got it right. Name’s Harald, but you can call me grandpa if you want to.”
“It is lovely to meet you, Harald. ___ told me a great deal about you. You mean a lot to her.”
“Oh, she means more to me. My little girl, she’s my treasure.”
Taehyung feels warm in his chest. He loves to know that you have family who truly and honestly love you.
“We made raspberry pie as well”, your grandmother says.
“Yes, pie! I’m so ready to eat at least three slices!” you exclaim happily and take her hand, “grandma, can I have the recipe? I forgot to ask you last time, but I would really love to make it at home.”
“Of course, my honeybee. Do you have raspberry bushes at your home as well?”
“I do. Yoongi wants to teach me one day how I can make them grow like you make yours grow, but for now I have to learn better control.”
“Control is really important. I’m impressed that you managed to get all of you here unharmed.”
“I know. Oh god, grandma I was so nervous you have no idea.”
You take off your shoes by the front door. Your grandmother scurries off to prepare lemonade, while your grandfather leads you upstairs. He is carrying your bag because he insisted that it is a grandfather’s job to carry his grandchild’s bags. 
“It’s so cozy here”, Jungkook says.
“Aye, cozy it is”, your grandfather says, leading you to your bedroom, “I built all of it myself. Not in this world, but the real one. The house was already there when I came here. Don’t ask me how it works, Agatha’s the one with magic, I’m just here to be her support.”
He makes you laugh with it. He smiles fondly, putting your bag on your bed.
“Two of you can sleep here. The rest can sleep in the guestroom. Ignore the mess on the desk. I use it as my hobby room when it’s just the two of us.”
“What do you enjoy as a hobby?” Taehyung asks, walking next to him. They are the same height, carrying themselves with good posture.
“I’m a collector of old weapons. Without the ammunition of course. I spend a lot of time cleaning and restoring old weapons.”
“Oh, that sounds wonderful. I have quite a few rare pieces in my own collection. I shall bring some of them with me next time we visit.”
“So you’re a collector too?”
“I am sure not as passionate as you, but my age automatically comes with many trinkets and pieces, which I find myself collecting.” 
“I see, well anyways, that’s the guest room. Make yourselves comfortable”, he says and studies you, “however that will work. Do you pull cards to decide?”
“We prefer to decide spontaneously.”
“I see, well anyways, rest for a bit, get comfortable. I’m downstairs for now”, he says and turns to leave. He gives you a hug before he does, patting your head, “my girl.”
Once it is just the four of you, Taehyung speaks.
“I got the feeling that he wanted to ask more about our situation, but he didn’t know how.”
“Knowing my grandpa, he really did. Especially because I came back dating three men, who also date each other.”
“Mostly. Some are only acquaintances”, Yoongi corrects you, making Taehyung gasp dramatically.
“Acquaintances? Excuse me? Have we not spent enough centuries together to at least be friends?” 
“I don’t know. You made fun of my outfit.”
“Oh, hyung you”, he nudges his arm, “you know that I was only jesting. You look very handsome.”
“Whatever”, Yoongi says and looks around the room awkwardly.
“Do you guys like it here?” you ask them.
“It’s so cozy. I like it a lot.”
“It also smells very good.”
“It does, gosh. And look, you can see the forest from here”, you say, hurrying to the small window. 
Your three boys gather behind you, trying to get a glimpse.
“I spent a lot of time in this forest. I can’t believe that I get to walk in it again. We are gonna take walks in it, aren’t we?” 
“Of course. I even packed my walking shoes for this occasion.”
“I’m so happy, you guys”, you say, following your grandmother with your eyes as she is hurrying through the garden to pick some mint, “I wanna go downstairs and help them.”
“We’ll come with you.” 
You spent the rest of the day together, talking and laughing. You tell your grandparents everything which happened in the years they weren’t with you anymore and it felt so good to do because this time around, you know that you had no rush in speaking. Yoongi was with you again. Taehyung and Jungkook as well. Everything was well and you are allowed to waste time telling silly stories of your life. Your grandparents are so very happy to listen to every single one of them. And so you spent the day talking until the moon replaced the sun in the sky and the crickets sang their nightly songs.
Yoongi helped your grandmother with dinner. You could listen to them bond over food. They even exchanged recipes and chatted about bread making. It made you feel really good inside to hear how Yoongi talks to your grandmother. Respectful and in a soft spoken voice. He is such a gentle person.
You and your other two boys wanted to help as well, but then your grandfather dragged you into a game of cards. He was sure that he could win, because he always won when you were still a child, but soon had to realise that his little girl was all grown up now. It made him a little sad and so you let him win the next round, which made him tease you in the adoring way he always teased you when he won. It made you really happy. You missed the game of cards with your grandfather.
Dinner has been served by now. You sit around the table, sharing the food your grandmother and Yoongi prepared with utmost love. It tastes so good that everyone goes for a second serving. You even go for a third because the combination of Yoongi’s cooking and your grandmother’s cooking is quite frankly, the most delicious combination to ever exist. Two cuisines which taste like home mixed into one. Truly, food couldn’t get any better than this.
You talk about food for most of it. Soon your grandfather leads the conversation to a different topic however. It was during dessert when tea was shared with your grandmother’s raspberry pie. You feed a spoonful to Taehyung and then to Jungkook, doing so with giggles on your lips.
“Is it yummy?” you ask them.
“Really, I missed your pie so much”, Jungkook murmurs.
“It is so sweet and rich in flavours. I truly enjoy it”, Taehyung gushes.
“Well, thank you my dear”, your grandmother says with fondness in her eyes. She likes to know when people enjoy her food. Especially her pies. She is very proud of her pies. All the recipes are her creations and she takes great pride in them. She wipes down the counters with a happy smile on her lips, listening to the conversation.
You break off another piece of the pie and turn to Yoongi.
“Now you, my love”, you tell him.
Yoongi meets you in the middle with an open mouth. He takes the pie off your fork gently, meeting your eyes shyly.
“And?”
He chews and swallows, nodding his head.
“Mhm”, he lets out, “really good. How are you getting the raspberry flavors to stay so intense, Agatha?”
“I couldn’t tell you. I think my raspberries really like me. It’s how they taste naturally.”
“Mhm, I could have figured. As a nature witch, you have a talent for gardens.”
Your grandmother chuckles mischievously and that is the moment when your grandfather stirs the conversation into a different direction.
“___ my girl, now I must ask something.”
“Yes, grandpa?” 
“Why are you all dating?” 
“Harald, you can’t ask that out of nowhere”, your grandmother gasps, dropping the wipe on the counter to run to him and nudge his arm.
“It’s not out of nowhere. I really thought about it before I asked”, your grandfather defends himself.
“It doesn’t make it okay”, she throws back, but you assure her that it was alright to ask.
“I understand that it’s not really common to see, questions are allowed. Right, guys? Is it okay for you as well?” 
“Of course. We are very open to answer your questions”, Taehyung says.
“I don’t have a lot of experience with polyamory, but I’m okay as well”, Jungkook says.
“Me too. I’ll try my best to answer”, Yoongi says, “I was honestly just waiting for you guys to ask us. I know it must be weird to see your granddaughter return with three men by her side.”
“Not weird just…uncommon.”
“Gosh Harald, stop being so negative.”
“What? I’m just saying. It must be uncommon for you too. I’m sure they know that it’s not something you see every day.”
“Harald!”
“It’s really okay, grandma. We know it’s not seen a lot. It would be weird if you weren’t confused.”
Agatha gives up with a sigh and sits down by her chair.
“Fine, okay. I admit that I’m a little curious as well.”
“What do you want to know? I don’t want you guys to have a bad idea of polyamory so I’m really open to all questions”, you say.
“What does it mean to be poly? Is that what you call the dating you are doing?”
“Yes, that’s the official name for it.” 
“It sounds really stressful to me”, your grandfather says.
“It can be stressful if you don’t communicate and understand each other. If you talk and respect each other, it’s not stressful at all.”
“But how can you spend enough time with every person?” 
“It’s easy for us because we live in the same estate, so sometimes we spend time by being in the same room.”
“I would also say that it really helps to make a schedule”, Taehyung says.
“A schedule?” 
“Indeed. We sit down and make a plan of when someone wants to spend time with another. We plan dates, schedule holidays and decide on who wants to spend time with whom.”
“So you decide on special date days just for this one pairing? Are you even couples? How does it work?”
“Yes, we plan special couple days so nobody feels left out. Not all of us are dating however.”
“How can I understand that?” 
“I’m dating Yoongi, Tae and Kook”, you say, “while Yoongi is only dating Kook and me.”
“I am dating ___, Yoongi and Tae”, Jungkook says, “but Tae only dates ___ and me.”
“So you and you”, your grandpa points at Yoongi and Taehyung respectively, “are just friends?” 
“Indeed we are.”
“I guess.” 
“But how does that work?”
“We aren’t interested in each other”, Yoongi says, “but we respect each other enough not to want to break up the polycule.” 
“Indeed. We spend friendship time with each other, isn’t that so?”
“I guess”, Yoongi murmurs, avoiding Taehyung’s eye contact shyly.
“This is really mindboggling to me. All of it”, your grandfather says and looks at your grandma, “do you understand it, Agatha?”
“Oh Harald, why must you be so negative? If it makes our___  happy, then I understand everything I need to understand.” 
“I wasn’t judging. I am just really confused. Don’t you get jealous or insecure?”
“Sometimes”, Taehyung says, “I think that jealousy can’t even be prevented in monogamous relationships and there are definitely more opportunities to get jealous in a polycule. Sometimes a person wants attention from someone, but the person they want affection from is busy with someone else. Jealousy or insecurities are unavoidable.”
“Exactly, sometimes you also feel as if your time spent with them is shorter than that of the others and you get jealous of that”, Jungkook agrees.
“Or as if you received less love than others, which can make you feel insecure”, Yoongi says.
“But the most important thing to remember is that jealousy is human and that it is important to talk about it. When one of us gets jealous or insecure, we sit down to talk and fix the issue together”, you say.
“It really helps because almost all of the time, the insecurities are gone after the conversation”, Taehyung says.
“And we realise that the jealousy was useless”, Jungkook says.
“I see. I might start to understand a thing or two. I thought that you never get jealous and found it unbelievable. It’s good to hear that jealousy happens, but that you talk about it”, your grandpa says and reaches out to caress your hand, “my girl, you have this from your grandmother. She always wants to talk about everything.” 
“Talking about the issue is important. Otherwise it will linger and become an unwanted curse on your heart.” 
“That is true, my darling witch”, your grandfather says and kisses her cheek.
She leans in with a mischievous giggle.
“Now one last question. You know me, I’m too nosy.”
“Yes?”
“Does it mean that intimacy is always together?”
“Harald, you are inappropriate”, Agatha says with a slap to his arm.
“I’m just saying. You know, the seventies were a wild time. Your grandmother and I have some experiences with org-”
“Harald!”
Your grandfather lifts his hands in defeat. 
Your grandmother clicks her tongue, “crazy. Please don’t listen to him, he is being childish.”
Taehyung and Jungkook chuckle knowingly and exchange a boyish look with your grandfather.
“Do not worry. I find it very important to make sexuality a normal topic and to remove the negative stigma around it. Without sex, none of us would be here right now and intimacy can be a very important part to show affection to the people you love. So I believe that it is important to see sex as something positive and normal, instead of demonising it. Of course it is very important to keep such conversations age appropriate, but I see no evil in talking about it between adults”, Taehyung says.
“I agree, yes”, your grandfather says, “I don’t even want details, just a yes or no.”
“May I answer it?” Taehyung asks to which all of you consent to with a nod. So he looks at your grandfather and talks, “sometimes we share intimacy between more than two people, but most of the time, intimacy is shared between two people.”
“What about you and Yoongi?”
“We do not sleep with each other.”
“I see. Forgive me for asking.” 
“Worry not. I hope that I could answer your questions.”
“You could”, your grandfather says and looks to the side. He seems just a little embarrassed to have asked such a question.
“Now I have a question as well”, your grandma says.
“Yes?”
“Does polyamory mean that you like men and women?”
“It can, but not always. There are also strictly same sex polycules or non binary polycules.”
“What does non binary mean?” 
“Well, to put it very short. It means when you don’t identify as female or male. In a sense the person can identify as both or neither. This is the very short answer.” 
“I see. And in your case it means that you are all attracted to men and women?”
“Yes, in my case it does. However I identify as queer. Gender isn’t important for my attraction to form, as I am drawn to the person and not their gender identity and I feel most comfortable in identifying as queer.”
“Gender doesn’t matter to me either, so I resonate most with being bisexual”, Jungkook says.
“I don’t do labels. I like who I like”, Yoongi says.
“I don’t know what I am. Sometimes I think about kissing a girl”, you confess, “I never told this before. Please don’t tell mom and dad, they don’t know.”
“How should we tell them?” your grandmother says with a fond laugh on her lips.
“Ah yeah, I totally forgot that this isn’t the real world. Damn, it’s insane to think that we’re in a magical afterlife right now. It feels so real.”
“In an unexplainable, but wonderful way this is real.”
You smile at the thought, reaching out to hold your grandparent’s hands.
“I’m so happy that it is. I really missed you so much.”
“We missed you too, my honeybee.”
“My girl, hm, my girl.”
“How is it possible for grandpa to be here? You said that you would tell me later.”
“Ah yes, I did”, she says, shifting into a more comfortable position, “there is a ritual you can do to mark the soul of a person so it is worthy to live in this realm after death.”
“There is?”
“Yes, yes there is. Harald, get me the book”, she says and gestures to the bookcase in the living room.
Your grandfather stands up, “the purple one?”
“No, the black one with the moon on the front.”
“Okay.”
He looks for it for a moment, returning with it once he found it. He places it on the table and sits down. Your grandmother opens it in the middle. Drawings of spell materials are on the right page while the left describes the ritual in detail.
“It is a very difficult ritual and dangerous too.”
“Yeah it really is”, Yoongi agrees, “if you get the mixture wrong, the soul ends up cursed.”
“So you know the spell?”
“No, I haven’t heard of it before, but I know what citrine powder mixed with too much beryl dust does. Especially when you use it in this kind of way and with these enchantments. It can curse the soul so that after death, it dissolves into nothing.”
“You know a lot about magic, don’t you?”
“Yoongi was a student of Nilrem.”
Your grandmother widens her eyes in surprise.
“Nilrem? The creator of magic?”
“The bringer of magic, yes. He always said that he came from another universe, but he was honestly crazy so I don’t know if he just made stuff up.”
“This is actually very shocking to me. ___ told me that you had knowledge in magic, but I never connected the dots that it is because you were one of Nilrem’s students.”
“Yeah no, I was”, he says shyly, scratching the side of his neck.
“Fascinating”, she says and giggles shyly, “please forgive me, but this feels as if I am meeting a celebrity.”
Yoongi blushes and looks to the side. You give his cheek a little kiss.
“He’s so cool, isn’t he?”
“Don’t say that”, he whispers, nudging you under the table.
“Mhm, he is the coolest”, you say and smooch him a second time despite his protesting nudge.
Your grandmother watches it fondly before looking back into the book.
“I bet you already know what you have to do for the spell to work, don’t you?”
“No please, don’t feel inferior in my presence. I seriously don’t know a lot about magic”, he assures her. He is being humble for her sake. It is obvious to all of you that he is.
“Did you enchant grandpa with this spell?”
“Yes I did. I measured the ingredients multiple times and practiced the spell many times.”
“So you can practice spells?”
Your grandmother looks at Yoongi.
“Please go ahead, Agatha”, he tells her, giving her enough confidence to continue.
“Yes you can. There is a method where you can enchant a hay puppet with it and then throw it into flames. When the smoke turns black, the spell would fail but if it turns white, the spell is correct.”
“I see. This is actually so helpful. When Yoongi was in a magical coma, I got help from Meredith and her coven.”
“I know Meredith.”
“Yes, we got help from them and they tested spells by drawing blood from Jungkook and inflicting the portions with the curse. It was really fascinating and I never thought that it was possible.”
“Oh you know so much already, my honeybee”, she says with great melancholy in her eyes, “it’s correct that you can find an antidote against blood curses by testing it on small amounts of the right blood”, she says and looks at Jungkook, “that would mean that you are from Yoongi’s bloodline.”
“I am. Wow, how did you know?” Jungkook gasps.
“The vampire curse is just a little different in each Creator’s blood, which means their creations are each just a little different because the change is based on the Creator’s blood. Which means that Meredith could only successfully test out the different antidotes on your blood because you shared Yoongi’s specific curse properties. It wouldn’t have worked otherwise.”
“Wow, I didn’t know that”, Jungkook confesses, “did you?”
Yoongi shakes his head, “not so detailed. I knew that my sire line shares the same curse as me, but I didn’t know that my curse also changed their blood to be the same as mine.”
“Does that mean that they’re the same in here as well?” you ask.
“No”, she shakes her head, “in here no curses can reach. You are all how you were when you were still human”, she glances at Yoongi, “or witches.”
Yoongi looks at his hands with widened eyes, as if he just realised what it meant to be free of his curse.
“Oh.”
“Wow, this is so cool”, you are too occupied with being excited to notice, “you know so much, grandma. This world is so cool and this spell is even cooler. Does this mean that I could make sure that they find peace in this world if they ever die?”
“You could, but you have to be careful”, she furrows his brows in seriousness, “this curse isn’t to take lightly. I only started practicing it once I knew I had complete control over my powers and I only put it on your grandfather after practicing it for months.”
“I understand. I won’t do it without practice, I promise.”
“That’s what I want to hear, my honeybee”, she says and caresses your cheek, “I’m so proud of you.”
You lean into her touch, feeling so very warm in your chest.
“Thanks, grandma.”
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Taehyung helps with washing the dishes after dinner, while Jungkook and Yoongi help your grandfather outside with the animals. You stay with your grandmother and Taehyung, telling her more about how you think that your boys are the coolest people ever. She listens to you happily. After cleaning up, you play cards until your grandparents get too tired and excuse themselves for the night.
Your grandparents are the first to wash up, while Jungkook and Taehyung say that they will unpack their bags a little. You are the next to wash up, now currently leaving the bathroom in your coziest pyjamas.
“Careful.”
“Oh? Oops”, you stop in your tracks after almost crashing into Yoongi.
He lowers his hand, having wanted to knock.
“Did you want to knock?”
He nods his head.
“I didn’t hear anything, so I didn’t know if it was empty already. Human hearing and shit, it’s useless”, he says, making you chuckle.
“It’s empty now”, you tell him and step out of the doorframe, “if you’re quick, you even get the warmth.”
“Yeah, thanks uhm”, he says and disappears inside.
You study the closed door for a moment, having to smile. He’s especially cute tonight. Really awkward. You love when he’s awkward, because he gets so adorable when he is.
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Jungkook is in your bedroom, turning to you when you enter. He looked at your desk before that. His eyes begin sparkling, his lips curl into a smile.
“Hey there”, he says.
“Hey there”, you say.
“Wow, I love the pyjamas. Purple. The colour fits you so well.”
“Thanks, heh”, you say, posing for him in a cute way.
He appreciates it with sparkling eyes and the brightest smile ever. 
“And they’re really soft.”
“I can tell”, he says and continues with a shy gleam in his eyes, “I didn’t wanna be all alone downstairs, so I waited for you. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Not at all. Did you find something you like?”
“I looked at the drawings on your desk. Are they yours?”
“Yup, my childhood drawings.”
“Wow, you had talent.”
You close the distance between you and him, travelling your eyes over the drawings.
“I did, didn’t I? I mostly painted the cottage, my grandparents and the animals. This is Moo and this is supposed to be Jumper”, you say, pointing at the childish drawing of a cow and a brown rabbit.
“I can totally see the resemblance. You really nailed Jumper’s long ears.”
“I did, yeah”, you say, having to snicker.
Jungkook snickers as well, rubbing his hand up and down your back in an innocent show of affection. He ends the adoration with a little massage of your neck and a soft brush down your hair. You really love receiving it, feeling safe in his presence.
“The fabric’s really soft. You’re right”, he says, caressing your back again.
“I know, it’s so comfy.”
He leans in and sniffs you by your shoulder.
“Hm, smells good too.” 
“It’s the detergent we always use.”
“It’s nice.”
He kisses your shoulder in an innocent show of affection, then straightens up to look at the drawings on the wall. More drawings of the cottage and its animals, a few drawings of flowers and other plants and some are family portraits of you and your grandparents. 
“It’s kinda cute that they kept all of this even in the afterlife”, he says.
“I know, it’s so cute. Do you think that it looks different here than it did last time?”
“Yeah, totally. More alive I would say and a lot more lived in.”
“Yeah, I think so too. Did you test out the bed yet?”
He shakes his head, “I didn’t know if I could. I’m still in my clothes and all.”
“No, you totally could have”, you assure him and walk to your bed. You throw yourself onto it, bouncing on it with a big grin on your lips.
Jungkook laughs in fondness.
“Come here, the bounce is great.”
Jungkook closes the distance and sits down next to you, laughing loudly when you bounce next to him, making him shake around this way.
“Do it too.”
Jungkook does as he is told, bouncing on the mattress with silly laughter on his lips. You have to laugh as well, wiggling your toes because it’s so fun to be silly with him.
“Ah, I love it here”, you say, dropping into the sheets with your arms stretched far from you.
Jungkook rests his weight on his hand, having his torso turned to you.
“It’s really nice here, yeah”, he agrees.
“It also smells so nice”, you say, sniffling vividly.
Jungkook breathes in deeply, “yeah right. Like fresh laundry and hay.”
“Yeah, so nice.”
“My nose is so weak though. It’s a little weird not to smell a million scents all the time.”
“Gosh, this must feel like a holiday.”
“It does. I can only smell the laundry, the hay and your soap. At home I would smell your emotions and your blood and the animals outside and, and, and”, he huffs out air, “damn, I really smell a lot don’t I?” 
“You really do.”
“Ah, it’s nice to take a break from it.”
Silence overcomes you where Jungkook gazes at you and you gaze at him. You end up having to smile at him. He retorts it and shifts his eyes to your stomach.
“You’ve got a little skin showing”, he says, reaching to fix the slipped up shirt.
“I know, the movement made my shirt slip up.”
“Mhm”, he hums and does the unthinkable thing of pulling the shirt further up your tummy so he could lean down and blow raspberries on it.
“No please!” you squeak, lifting your legs and grabbing his head because it tickles so much.
Jungkook does it again, forcing the loudest cackle to escape you.
“Koo stop”, you complain, trying to push his head away.
“Sorry”, he laughs and pulls the shirt down. He lies down next to you and attacks your neck next.
“This isn’t better, Kook stop it”, you complain in cackles and little squirms.
Jungkook smiles against your skin. His heart is racing like crazy in his chest.
“You’re so fucking cute”, he whispers and goes to attack you again.
“Please”, you squeal, having to laugh honestly and loudly. He is tickling you, but it doesn’t feel awful. It feels good. Safe. Tingly. You can’t stop laughing, trying to fight him off with soft tugs at his strong arm.
But Jungkook is stronger than you, pinning you down even more by lying some of his weight on your chest and attacking the other side of your neck.
He probably would have teased you to the point of tears of laughter if someone hadn’t knocked on your door. He stops instantly, lifting his head. Did you wake your grandparents?
Knock. Knock.
“Yeah?” you call out.
“It’s me”, Yoongi says. 
“Come in.”
The door opens and in steps Yoongi. He is in his black pyjamas with his hair unstyled and his cheeks looking especially dewy. He closes the door, waddling to your bed. Then he stands. Stands and stares and rubs his own tummy. 
“Do you need something, my love?” you ask him, sitting up in bed. 
Jungkook sits up as well, looking at Yoongi with curious eyes. 
“I was maybe thinking that, I don’t know, maybe uhm maybe, uhm”, he stutters, blushing shyly, “nevermind, it’s stupid”, he says and tries to flee.
You however stop him with a gentle touch to his inner wrist.
“You can talk to us”, you assure him, giving him a sweet smile, “what’s the matter, love?”
“Uhm”, Yoongi begins, “uhm, uh. Do you wanna, uhm, share a bed tonight?” he finally gets out, looking at Jungkook.
“Me?” Jungkook makes sure.
Yoongi nods his head, touching his own ear to soothe himself. 
“I was thinking maybe it could be nice. I don’t know, it’s stupid. Sorry, it’s stupid.” 
“No, it’s not. I love this idea”, Jungkook says and reaches out to touch Yoongi’s waist, “I would love to share a bed with you, my hyungie.” 
“Okay. That’s cool”, Yoongi says dryly but with flushed cheeks. 
“Is that okay with you, ___?”  Jungkook makes sure. 
You look between them. Jungkook is excited, while Yoongi is nervous.
“Of course that’s okay with me. You two deserve all the bed snuggles in the world”, you say and grin, “I also get to snuggle Tae, so that’s a win for me.”
Jungkook chuckles fondly while Yoongi relaxes in relief.
“That’s true, Tae snuggles are very nice”, Jungkook says and pecks your cheek, “is the bathroom empty?”
“Yeah”, Yoongi confirms.
“Coolio, I’ll wash up and I’m expecting you in the guest bed once I’m done”, he says and snickers, rolling out of bed to leave the room.
He closes the door. 
Yoongi sits down on bed instantly, taking your hands. He squeezes them so tightly, one might wonder if he wanted to crumble them.
“I’m sorry.”
“For what?” 
“I don’t wanna make you feel as if you’re not important to me. I, I love sleeping next to you, but I, I wanna spend time with Jungkook too. Sometimes. I’m sorry, Please don’t be too mad at me.” 
“Gosh Yoongi, you’re worrying for nothing”, you say in a fond chuckle and kiss his cheek. You keep close afterwards, running your fingers through his hair, “I’m not mad at you. This is part of what being poly is. Sometimes you just wanna spend time with a certain person, but that doesn’t mean the other automatically loses value. I don’t feel mad that you crave Kookie time tonight.”
Yoongi relaxes his shoulders, gazing at you.
“Thank you for understanding, you’re so…” he sighs and speaks in a softer voice, “I’m a mess and you’re calm. This is all new to me. I haven’t done poly before. I’m a mess. I practiced outside ‘cause I was scared of your reaction. You’re so calm. I feel peaceful.” 
“Gosh Boongie, you cutie. I’m glad that I make you feel at peace”, you say and kiss his cheek a second time. 
He leans into the affection, closing his eyes halfway.
“I also understand your feelings about doing poly for the first time. It’s my first time as well and I’m really scared to mess up, but I think that our little family can make it work.” 
“Yeah me too”, he agrees, nodding his head.
“We’re doing really well, I think.”
He nods his head, shifting his eyes to your intertwined hands. He traces your knuckles with his thumbs, following the movement with sparkling eyes.
“How are you liking the stay here?” you ask him because you crave just a little more of his voice.
“Good. I think it’s good”, he says, nodding his head.
“Yeah? Me too. I really love it here. Gosh Yoongi, it was my dream to show this place to you. It makes me so happy that you can finally see it.”
“I like it, yeah”, he meets your eyes, “I’m sorry.”
“For what?”
“I didn’t talk a lot.”
“At dinner?”
“Yeah.”
“That’s okay, my love. You were perfect. I can assure you that my grandparents love you.”
“I hope. I’m really nervous.”
“I can tell, but don’t be. You’re doing really well”, you assure him, combing your fingers through his soft hair.
“Thank you”, he whispers.
You kiss his cheek, rubbing his back afterwards.
“I spent so much of my early childhood in this room. I have really dear memories of it.”
“It’s a good room.”
“Yeah it is”, you agree and stand up to get the drawings from the table. You sit down next to him and show them to him, “I painted a lot in my free time. Mostly the cottage, the animals and my grandparents. Do you recognise the cow?”
“Is it the one outside?”
“Correct. Her name’s Moo. I named all of the animals here, which is why the names are very unoriginal.”
Yoongi smiles softly and takes the drawing with careful fingers.
“Moo is a good name for a cow.”
“I guess so, yeah”, you snicker, “the bunnies are called Jumper, Flopsi and Daisy.”
“Cute.”
“Yeah, they’re so cute. The second cow is called Milky.”
He laughs.
“Don’t laugh, I told you the names are very unoriginal.”
“It’s cute, I’m laughing ‘cause it’s cute”, he says, meeting your eyes shyly. You give him a grin, kissing his lips afterwards.
“You’re cute.”
He looks away, blushing instantly.
“You’ve been freaking cute the entire day. Do you know that, my love?”
He shakes his head, touching the side of his neck.
“Now you know.”
“Okay”, he mumbles and tries to change the topic by flipping the drawings, “do the chickens have names too?”
“Of course they do. I was obsessed with Greek mythology back then, so I named all the chickens after Greek goddesses, except for Jolene who I named after the song because my grandparents always played it and I was obsessed with it.”
Yoongi smiles. He thinks that you were very adorable as a child. 
“The second brown chicken is Helen, the white ones are Aphrodite and Hera. The two black ones are Persephone and Hades.”
“Hades?”
“I was obsessed with him. I genuinely thought that he was so cool.”
“You think the weirdest dudes are cool.”
“I think you’re cool.”
“Exactly.”
“Yoongi, come on”, you nudge his arm, “you’re not weird. In some strange way you remind me of him.”
“I do? Why?”
“He really loved Persephone and dedicated a lot to her. He’s this scary dude to so many people, but secretly he is just a big softie for his wife.”
“Yeah, I guess that’s true. I’m soft for you”, he says, leaning in to kiss your cheek.
You accept his affection with closed eyes.
“Didn’t he also kidnap her and force her to marry him and live with him? I don’t think that’s what a softie would do. He forced her and that’s definitely not me.”
You laugh, “no, that’s definitely the part we’ll ignore. You’re not like that at all.”
“Yeah, he’s a fucking asshole”, he agrees.
“God, you and your harsh tongue.”
“I mean it. He’s an asshole. I don’t think I’m like him at all. I would never force you to do anything.”
“Okay fine, I admit it. You’re not like him at all, sorry. You’re a cutie patootie”, you say and kiss his cheek.
He smiles, leaning in with a fluttering heart.
“But you are a softie. Don’t fight me on that.”
He laughs, “I can live with that.”
You snicker.
“Hyung?”
You and Yoongi look at the door where Jungkook is standing in a light blue pyjama set.
“Are you coming?” he asks Yoongi.
“Huh?”
Jungkook steps into the room, grinning cutely. He struts to the bed and takes Yoongi’s hands. It results in Yoongi gawking at him with big eyes and parted lips.
“I told you to wait for me in bed, but you’re still here. Get your butt over here”, he says, tracing his knuckles gently.
“Sorry, I’m already coming”, Yoongi murmurs and looks at you, “sleep tight, my princess.”
“Sleep tight as well, my prince. And you too my honey, sleep tight.” 
“You too, my honey”, Jungkook says, stealing a loving kiss.
You smile, smiling brighter when Yoongi steals a kiss as well before he finally stands up. The two men turn to each other and soon after, leave the room.
“What are you thinking, hyungie? Do you wanna make music together?” 
“Only if you want to. I don’t know, maybe, yeah. Or no. If you want to.”
“Why are you so nervous? It’s just me”, Jungkook is teasing.
“Shut up, you brat I…”
Their conversation drowns out as they close the door behind them, but seconds later, Jungkook’s bright laughter can be heard. 
You sigh in fondness, grinning to yourself. You are so happy that they have each other. To think that they will spend a lovely evening with each other, doing stuff they enjoy doing together, just makes you so incredibly happy. You really hope that their night is wonderful and filled with safe intimacy. 
You roll out of bed and leave your room in search of Taehyung. You can’t wait to spend time with him. 
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The cottage is empty. How weird. Where could he be? You look around for a bit, noticing that your grandpa left the lights on outside. You open the front door, which is surprisingly unlocked. How weird indeed. Your grandpa is normally very particular with locking the doors at night. 
“Huh?”
You turn off the lights to see better. There are candles burning where the small table is. Someone is sitting by it. You squint your eyes. Taehyung. Taehyung is sitting by the table. Your heart flutters. There he is, you finally found him. Oh, you can’t wait to get to him.
You wrap a blanket around yourself and grab one for Taehyung, leaving the house afterwards in your slippers. The good thing about this magical realm is that it never gets dark enough that you feel blind. You can still walk comfortably even now that it is night. And yet somehow when you are lying in bed, trying to sleep, the night feels like the darkest night you have ever experienced. Perhaps it is the magic infused in this air, which makes the night as bright or as dark as one needs it to be.
Taehyung doesn’t hear you. In the real world, he would have lifted his head the moment you stepped out the door, but not here. He is still oblivious to you. Only when you tap his shoulder, does he finally react.
“Oh heavens”, he gasps, flinching vividly.
“Sorry, oh dear”, you get out, placing your hand on his shoulder, “it’s just me, don’t be scared.”
“Darling”, he whines, looking up at you with big eyes, “you frightened me. Do not sneak up on me like this.”
“I’m sorry”, you say and snicker, “gosh, this was hilarious. You should have seen your face.”
“Yes, yes make fun of me all you want, but the truth is that I almost died right now”, he says and touches his own chest, “my heart is racing. Feel it.”
You reach down and place your hand on his chest. He wasn’t lying. His heart is hammering against his ribcage.
“That’s true. Your pulse’s going crazy”, you say and giggle.
“Yes, because you frightened me”, he says, giving your hand a gentle squeeze.
“I’m sorry, really”, you chuckle, “but I have to make use of you guys’ weak senses. You guys keep startling me in the real world, so this is all just part of my revenge plan.”
He laughs.
“Oh how terribly mean of you. I will pay you back.”
“Will you now?”
“Yes.  Yes, I will”, he says and hugs your waist, squishing his cheek against your stomach this way. He giggles, scrunching his nose.
He is such a cutie. You feel so incredibly soft for him. You ruffle his hair, making him look up at you this way. The candle light shows his sparkling puppy eyes. His features look so timelessly beautiful. You trace them gently, which makes him open and close his eyes at you slowly. 
“Okay, okay. If you really have to”, you say with a fond smile on your lips, brushing your fingertips down the slope of his nose. 
Taehyung giggles and nuzzles his nose into your stomach. A kiss comes next. He turns back to the table afterwards. 
You follow his line of sight. He is drawing. Using what formidable light the candles emit to sketch your bedroom. He uses a photograph as reference, drawing it with impressive accuracy.
“Are you drawing my bedroom?” you ask him, running your hand up and down his back mindlessly. He is already a little cool to the touch.
“Indeed I am”, he says, “I want to sketch it so I can finally start on designing the murals.”
“Really? Wow Tae, I’m so excited.”
“Yes, me too. I haven’t worked on murals in years, although I truly enjoy the process of them. Working on your wing will be a lot of fun.”
“I can imagine”, you say and rub his back more vigorously, “gosh darling, aren’t you cold? You feel so cold to the touch. Here, let me.”
You place a blanket over his shoulders, smoothing it down carefully. Taehyung looks up at you with big puppy eyes, holding his breath. You end your affection with a soft brush of your fingers against the underside of his chin. He tilts his head as he chases the touch.
“Why?” he asks in a whisper.
“What do you mean?” 
“Why did you put a blanket over me?” 
“Because I know how chilly it can get and you don’t have superpowers keeping you warm right now.” 
“I see. That is correct”, he says, lowering his eyes shyly. His pulse is racing. It flusters him terribly whenever you take care of him. 
“Can I stay with you a little while?” 
“Yes, of course. Of course, you can”, he says, scooting to the side to make space.
You take it instantly, looking into the notebook. Your left hand is resting on his thigh.
“Are these sketches for the flower murals?” you ask him, pointing at the opposite page.
“Indeed, they are. What do you think of them?” 
“They look lovely.”
“Do you like them?”
“I really do. I’m already excited to have them on my walls. I love them.”
Taehyung giggles and rests his cheek on your shoulder, grinning brightly.
“Thank you so much. It makes me so happy to hear this”, he says and nuzzles. 
You turn your head, placing a kiss on the tip of his nose. Taehyung sighs and chases your kiss. 
You and he share a sweet moment. He tastes like smiles and chocolate. It is a lovely combination. You break the kiss with a stub of your nose, caressing his skin with it afterwards.
“You taste like chocolate.”
“I am eating chocolate”, Taehyung says and sits up, “do you want some?” he offers.
“Thank you”, you say, breaking off a row. You bite off a good piece and let it melt on your tongue, the other piece you feed to Taehyung. He allows you with a fluctuating pulse. Truly, you make him feel so giddy. 
“What do you think of it?” he asks you in a soft voice.
“It’s slightly bitter but with a sweet aftertaste. I really like it.”
“I like it as well”, he says and lowers his eyes, letting out a shy giggle. He turns his head away, “oh heavens.”
“What’s the matter?”
“When I look at you, my heart races. The feeling is so unfamiliar.”
“Can I feel it?”
Taehyung nods his head, holding his breath when you place your hand on his chest. 
Badums. Badums. Badums. 
His pulse is rhythmical and steady, keeping him alive here in this magical realm where no curse can reach and the world is alright. You circle your thumb in a gentle caress, lifting your eyes and meeting his shy gaze.
You smile. Taehyung retorts it. 
“It’s racing.”
“It is.”
You kiss his cheek, speeding up his pulse for the duration of it. You pull back. Taehyung touches the spot you kissed, gazing at you with parted lips 
“It fluttered when I did that”, you whisper. 
“I know”, he breathes.
“It feels so strange, but in a good way.”
“I cannot get used to it.”
“You can’t?” 
He shakes his head, “my heart stood still for centuries, but all of a sudden it beats again. I keep having to take deep breaths because I am so aware of it.” 
“I can imagine. It must feel crazy to be alive again after all these years.”
“Crazy. I guess one can say it like this”, he whispers and turns away so he can draw again. Except that he doesn’t draw, twirling the pen in his fingers as his eyes race over the sketches. 
You slide your hand to his side, hugging him and resting your cheek against his shoulder.
“Do you remember our first time?” you ask him.
“Our first time?” 
You nod your head, “when we snuck away from acting class and hurried to my apartment. You were so touchy and I felt so giddy because you hadn’t been like this until then.”
Taehyung smiles softly, listening to you reminisce with a fluttering heart.
“I could barely unlock the door, but got nervous once inside. Do you remember?” 
“I do.” 
“Do you remember how we talked and shared some tea?” 
“Of course I do. You told me that you didn’t have a lot of experience.”
“And you were so sweet about it”, you squeeze him gently, “do you remember the dreams we talked about?” 
“You said that you wanted to make people happy.”
“And you told me that you wanted to be alive. That you wanted to be happy again.”
Taehyung lowers his eyes, tightening his jaw. 
“Remember?” 
“I do”, he whispers.
“Well, now you finally know how it feels to be alive”, you say and lift your head to gaze at him.
You furrow your brows.
“What’s the matter?” 
“Nothing.”
“Tae, what’s the matter?” 
“I don’t know”, he says and turns his head away when you try to cup his cheek.
You try again, doing it with both hands. You succeed, meeting his eyes. 
“What’s the matter, darling?” 
“I don’t know if I’m happy”, he whispers, forcing your brows to furrow. He attempts to look away, to hide because the worry in your eyes embarrasses him.
“Taehyung my darling oh god, this is so awful. Is there a reason why you feel this way?” 
“I’m sorry, I just…I shouldn’t have said that.”
“No, please don’t be embarrassed. Talk to me, my darling.”
He meets your eyes again. Worry and love meet him there. Honest, deep love. The kind of love that wants to welcome and heal, to hold and cradle, to stay and grow. He remembers the last part of his wish then. That he wanted to be loved for who he truly is. He remembers it and realises that he can find this kind of love in your eyes. And as he realises it, his heart races unbearably, reminding him that he is experiencing the first part of his wish as well. He is alive and he is loved unconditionally.
Only the second part is hard to do. It wasn’t always difficult, or perhaps it was and he pretended that it wasn’t, and lately he is very aware of it, finding it hard to accept. 
“Talk to me, my sweetest”, you whisper.
“It”, he begins and looks away because it is too embarrassing otherwise. 
You allow him, holding his hand instead and listening to him with all your attention.
“It is difficult to be happy. I do not know what to do with myself now that I am…” he falters.
“It’s okay, take your time.”
“Namjoon is captured. He won’t ever hurt me and Jimin again. I should be happy, but I am not. I feel so lost.”
“Because we don’t have to hunt anything anymore?” 
“No.”
“What then? If you want to tell me.”
“I want to tell you, but it is difficult to speak.”
“Do you want to write it down instead?” 
He looks at his book. His pen. He picks it up and opens an empty page, writing down what he can’t speak. You allow him the time he needs, scratching his scalp all throughout. 
Taehyung doesn’t take long. The unspeakable words aren’t much, but you know that sometimes the hardest words to speak are the shortest. I love you. I’m sorry. I need help. The words aren’t long and yet they are some of the hardest to speak for so many people. The way to the heart is short with them, which perhaps makes them so difficult to speak. Taehyung slides the book to you. You pick it up and read it.
“I feel lost and shaken, as if I am still drowning even now that I am on safe land. A scrambled mind and tortured body were my reality for decades and now I am to believe that I am free? How do I be free?”
You lift your eyes. He can barely keep up contact, but does it because he craves it.
“Oh Tae. My beloved, gentle Tae”, you get out and cradle his cheeks.
He leans into your safe touch, closing his eyes.
“I understand that the words are difficult to speak. This is a lot to feel all alone. How long have you been feeling this way?” 
“Too long.”
“Gosh, come here”, you say, pulling him into a hug. You sway him gently, playing with his hair because you know that this soothes him.
Taehyung lets it happen with closed eyes and his arms tight around you. His nose is buried in the crook of your neck, his skin shares warmth with yours. The once scary words feel manageable in your arms.
“I’m so sorry that you feel this way, my darling. It must be so unfamiliar to be free after so many decades. I don’t know if you want advice from me and I honestly don’t know if I can even give you some, but I want to be there for you. That much is sure, you’re not going to figure it out alone because I’ll help you with it.”
Taehyung smiles and it is honest. He nods his head in understanding.
“Yeah, exactly. I’ll be with you. We’ll do it together. Everyone always says that healing is easy, but it’s not. Healing can be ugly and hard and scary. But we’ll do it together, okay?”
“Yes, okay”, he whispers, having to lift his head to make sure that you were truly real. 
You cup his cheeks, caressing his skin. He smiles and so you smile as well.
“I’m happy right now”, he confesses in a quiet voice.
“You are?” 
He nods his head.  
“I doubt a lot in my life. I think the love I receive is an act of pity.”
“No-”
“Except yours. I don’t doubt your love for me. I gaze at it in wonder and awe because I find it unbelievable that you still love me after all I did, but I never doubt it.” 
Your heart flutters.
“Thank you so much. You told me that your wish was to make people happy. Well, you are making me happy”, he smiles shyly, “at least happier for now.”
You laugh softly. He does too.
“You’ll be happy again, I promise”, you say and tug a strand of his dark hair behind his ear, “also thank you for saying this. I love you so, so much and it makes me happy to know that I don’t make you doubt it.” 
“I love you too. I have done so ever since we snuck away from acting class and will always do so.”
“Oh my darling Taehyung”, you whisper, leaning in until you can rub your nose against his’ slowly.
“Yes, this will never change”, he whispers, matching your rhythm with his eyes closed. 
“Oh my sweet, gentle Tae”, you breathe, kissing him softly afterwards. 
He kisses you back, holding you in his hands as if you were the greatest treasure. And in some way you were. He feels lost and vast of happiness most of the time, but not right now. You gave him support again, an anchor to hold onto and hope to cling to. Maybe the feelings won’t last forever, but at least for a little while, Taehyung feels safe again. And that is perfectly alright for him, because sometimes just a little while is already enough to keep the soul going. 
Taehyung breaks the kiss so he could hug you against his chest and feel your heartbeat this way. He cannot hear it, but that is okay for him because he can feel it match with his’ tonight. He is alive with you. He is alive and safe and loved. Taehyung presses you closer, inhaling the scent of you to make all of this realer.
“Our hearts are beating the same”, he whispers.
“I can feel it too”, you whisper.
“Wow, I really love you so much.”
You smile, “I love you too.”
“Holy fuck, I really love you.”
You laugh, “I fucking love you too, Tae.”
He laughs, “you have me cursing. That’s what you are doing to me.”
You snicker, “it’s cute.” 
Wind rushes in the trees and reminds you of your own vulnerability. You and Taehyung tug the blankets tighter around your bodies, but the cold remains.
“I am very cold.”
“Yeah, me too. Maybe we should continue the cuddles inside”, you suggest, “after a warm shower and under the sheets.”
“This sounds very cozy.”
“It is cozy. Come on, we’ll get warm inside.”
“Yes, okay okay”, he says, standing up and packing his stuff so you could get inside.
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Taehyung allows you to brush your teeth first because he still has to wash up for the night and will therefore take longer. So after brushing your teeth, you go to your room alone. The slit under the door of Yoongi’s and Jungkook’s room shows no light anymore. They must be asleep already. You wish then a silent good night behind the closed door and slip inside your room. 
Taehyung comes inside not long after, still wrapped in a towel and nothing else.
“My bag is in the guest bedroom”, he says with a pout, “I forgot to take out my sleeping clothes.”
“Oh dear. Do you want to borrow some of my clothes?” 
“Your clothes?” 
“Yes, wait”, you roll out of bed to get to your bag, “luckily for you, I have another sleeping gown with me. You’ll look really fancy in it. I could also offer you some of my panties.”
He laughs, “I have to decline. My good parts are not going to stay in such little fabric.”
You snicker, “I bet it would look pretty, though. Here, I can offer you this”, you say, unravelling a long night gown, “tada.”
It is made out of lilac cotton fabric and has a rather straight cut to it. It isn't at all the prettiest nor the fanciest dress, but it is comfortable and that is all which matters.
“Oh pretty. It will do”, he says and exchanges the towel for the dress. He twists and turns in it, fixing the creases in the front, “how do I look?”
“It actually fits you perfectly, wow, you are so handsome in it. You also kind of remind me of Ebenezer Scrooge.”
“Hey”, he gasps, having to laugh, “if you were attempting to compliment me, it did not work.”
You laugh, “no, it’s cute. It fits you really well.”
“It is so comfortable. No wonder you took it with you”, he says and wiggles his hips, “oh? I feel so very free between my legs this way”, he jokes, gyrating his hips in a funny way and making you laugh with it.
“You look so handsome. Gosh, Tae you cutie you, com’ere”, you hug him, using the momentum to pull him into bed.   
He falls onto you with a squeaked laugh, burying you under his weight, which makes you laugh and hug him even closer.
“Careful, ah, darling you are going to expose my bottom this way”, he giggles, trying to fight you gently.
“Com’ere you cutie, god you cutie”, you care rather little about his complaints, rolling around the sheets with his body in a tight lock.
After some rolling around and soft wrestling, you have him on his back with his face under your lips as you attack it with kisses. Taehyung lets it happen with giggles and squirms, feeling so goddamn giddy that his heart might burst in his chest. 
“Mwuah”, you end your love attack with a loud sound, lifting your head so you can grin down at him. You slide your hand down his torso so you could fix the messy dress, caressing his waist afterwards.
“What?” he whispers.
“I just love looking at you.”
“Oh”, Taehyung blushes and scrunches his nose shyly, “I love looking at you too.”
“Hehe”, you let out and give him a kiss, lying down next to him afterwards.
Taehyung sits up, tugging you in under the blanket. You let it happen with a fluttering heart. 
“Thankies”, you say.
“My darling should stay warm”, he says and rubs his hand up and down your covered arm, “are you warm this way?”
“Yeah, I am.”
“Wonderful.”
He leans down to litter your cheek and temple with kisses. He even kisses your ear and leaves a few tender love nibbles on your neck. 
“My sweetest.”
He snuggles into the pillow, holding your hand. He gives you a cute grin.
“You are right, this is very cozy.”
“Right? It’s this place. Something about this room makes everything ten times cozier.”
“I truly believe that it is because everything is placed perfectly so the energies can flow.”
“Yeah, this could actually be it. It always felt healing to be here.”
“I can imagine. I find great healing here as well and it hasn’t even been a day.”
You smile, “I’m glad that you are healing. You deserve it.”
Taehyung kisses your knuckles in gratefulness.
“Thank you”, he breathes.
“I mean it. You and Jimin, you both deserve it.” 
“Thank you.”
“Mhm, I mean it”, you say and kiss his lips.
You and he stay closer afterwards, still holding hands. You gaze at each other, feeling so connected that nothing could separate your souls. 
You do not know how much time passes like this, but it must have been enough to allow sleepiness to settle in your fibers.
You yawn, setting off Taehyung as well.
“Oh dear, this sleepiness came out of nowhere, wow”, you say. 
“Indeed”, he agrees mid-yawn.
“Do you want to turn off the lights?”
“Yes, we could do that.”
“You have to do it, you’re closer.”
“Okay, okay”, Taehyung says and reaches for the lamp, “I started saying okay, okay because of you”, he says, switching off the light, “it is addictive, I can’t seem to want to stop.”
“It’s cute, don’t stop”, you say, “it means that we’re spending so much time together that we started picking up habits from each other. I catch myself adding rather in front of words because of you.”
“I noticed”, Taehyung says and intertwines his hand with yours, “it is like we became versions of each other.”
“Yes, definitely”, you say and close the distance between you and him to rest your forehead against his’. You kiss his nose, nuzzling your own nose against it afterwards, “I love you, Tae.”
“I love you too, my sweetest”, he says, closing his eyes.
“I hope you’ll have a good sleep tonight.”
“I will. I am with you. I will.”
You smile, burying your hand in his hair to play with it until sleep drags you down. You are with him and he is with you. Sleep is going to be good. It truly will be.
“___?”
“Yes, Tae?” 
“I just…I don’t know why I called your name, I guess that I wanted to talk some more.”
You chuckle.
“What do you want to talk about?”
“Whatever. I really enjoy the sound of your voice.”
“Gosh Tae, you’re so sweet. I love your voice as well.”
He relaxes in a small wiggle, running his fingers over your scalp as best as your hair texture allows him to.
“What is your favourite colour?”
“My favourite colour?”
“Yes. Do not ask why this is my first question, I didn’t know what to ask.”
You laugh softly, “it’s a good question. Mhm, I guess my favourite colour is the colour of your blush after I called you mine.”
“___”, he gasps, “why would you say such a thing? Oh, heavens.”
He makes you laugh. He is so adorable when he flusters.
“I’m serious. It’s a very pretty colour.”
“You”, he wraps his limbs around you, shaking you around gently, “I will cuddle you to silence. Stop it.” 
You giggle into his chest. Taehyung lets you go after a few moments, heart racing very noticeable.
“Do you have more questions, you cutie?”
“I do not know. I am afraid that you will use them to fluster me again.”
You laugh, “I would never do such a thing.”
“Yes, you would. You became such a flirt. I remember how shy you were in the beginning, how I always managed to fluster you and now look at what you have become.”
“Hey, do not complain about the monster you created. If you hadn’t been such a smooth talker with me all the time, I never would have learned all this stuff.”
He laughs, “I cannot even argue you on this one. You have shown me the truth.”
“See? I’ve simply learned from the best.”
Taehyung hums and tries to kiss your lips but because of the blinding darkness, he ends up snogging your nose. 
“Ew Tae, that was so wet”, you whine, wiping your nose on his shirt.
“Forgive me, I aimed for your lips but I…ew? Excuse me, did you just call my kiss ew?” 
“I did. Loud and proud. You completely snogged my nose.”
Taehyung closes his lips around your nose again and drags his tongue over it as sloppily as possible.
“Tae”, you squeak, fleeing him, “why did you do that?”
“This is for calling my kiss ew. Now I gave you something truly ew.”
“You’re so gross, dear god”, he makes you laugh. Wiping your nose on his shirt again, you snicker and chuckle. He does the same. 
You tilt your head, touching his chin to feel for his lips. Once you found them, you make your move, claiming them in a kiss. He kisses you back eagerly, ending it with a soft bite to your lower lip. You stay close, smiling goofily.
“This was wonderful.”
“It really was. Gosh Tae, I love kissing you. It’s been so long since we shared a night of kisses.”
“Indeed, far too long. Either danger kept us apart or we fought or were forced to be separated. These past few years haven’t been very kind to our bond.”
“Yeah, they really haven’t.” 
Taehyung feels for your lips and kisses you. He tastes minty, his lips are soft and so nicely moisturised. His big hand cradles your face, soaking you skin in his warmth. You touch his chest because his racing pulse feels amazing to you.
The kiss breaks because Taehyung is so human here and humans need air way sooner than vampires.
“Oh heavens”, he gasps for air, “I genuinely became out of breath.”
“Now you finally know why I have to keep breaking the kiss in real life.”
“Now I truly know. Is this also how you see when we kiss in darkness?”
“Yes, it’s exactly like that.”
“Well, this is just heartbreaking. All this time, I believed that you were seeing me at least a little bit, but there is nothing. How are you even able to figure out where to kiss?”
“Practice. I’ve only known nights to be dark, so I learned how to navigate it.”
“I see. This is still very sad, you cannot even see me.”
“I know, it’s sad. But it’s also exciting because it feels like sensory deprivation without the blindfold.”
“Oh? Oh, yes it does. Oh how exciting, if I wasn’t so utterly exhausted I would have asked you to play.”
“It’s okay. I’m really exhausted too. Bringing you all here was really tiring.”
“I can imagine”, he rubs your back, “you are truly remarkable. I do not know if I told you already, but I am very proud of you.”
“Thank you, wow”, you whisper, feeling like floating. Being praised by him will never lose its spark. 
“My darling witch”, he says with a kiss to your lips. One he only breaks when air is sparse and you are both just a little droopy from it.
You touch each other innocently, both having your eyes closed without managing to open them again. Sleep is so very close. The safe intimacy and love you exchanged only strengthened the tiredness. 
“What do you imagine our days to look like from now on?” he asks in a sleepy whisper.
“Peaceful. Probably exhausting for me because I need to learn control, but once I did and we managed to get rid of Superior, I think our days will be peaceful.”
“I truly hope that they will be. I wished for peace for too long.” 
“I promise you that they will.”
Taehyung sighs, hugging you against his chest. 
“My sweetest ___”, he whispers, “I am so entirely grateful that I never lost you. There were so many chances where you could have been taken from me, so I am entirely grateful that you never were.” 
“Me too, Tae. You’re very important to me.”
He sighs again, tangling his legs with yours. He yawns into your hair and smacks his lips.
“Sleepy”, he whispers, making you snicker.
“Me too.”
“Sleep tight, my darling. This time for real.”
“Sleep tight, you cutie.”  Yes, sleep will be peaceful. It really will be.
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wasteddmoondust · 21 hours
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pineapple || james potter
pairing: james potter x reader 1,219 words, teacher and james go on their first date! what could go wrong? a/n: can you tell i am horrible at titling my fics... somehow i just need it to relate to what happens. so uh. enjoy!
prev. chapter
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You feel your heart going absolutely crazy. You know it's first-date jitters, but somehow it feels worse this time. It's nothing special, really. You try to tell yourself. Just another first date. Just like other first dates (that has turned to nothing...) And now this first date is the father of one of the children you teach. Yeah, nothing special.
After several attempts to make yourself busy by looking at your phone, you hear your name. It's James and he's walking up to you.
"First name basis already?" you ask smugly.
He chuckles, "What? Sorry, I guess I'll just call you-"
"Please don't, I hate being called that outside of work."
"Got it."
The two of you walk together and he leads you to a quaint coffee shop, James swears by the coffee made here. When the orders are made you find a seat and sit down.
"It's been a while since I've been on a date," he says, hands fidgeting with the receipt.
"Same here," you admit.
He stops playing with the receipt and furrows his brows. "Really? But I'm the parent."
"And I'm the one taking care of your kid for a whole day, 20 kids, actually."
"Huh... and you don't even meet people in the industry?"
You snort. "Unfortunately no, a lot of them are older and married with kids. There's no one to date there. Trust me, even the older teachers try to make me get on dating apps. If anything, you're doing them a favour."
He grins that grin that makes your heart do a little flip. Oh god, it's happening, huh?
"I'm happy to do that."
You continue your conversation, keeping it light with small talk. Then, a waiter comes by to give you your meal and you both thank him. James' phone dings, he checks the message and he replies to it while you patiently wait for him.
He looks back up at you and keeps his phone. "Sorry, my best friend is taking care of Harry today, he was just sending an update."
"That's alright. Is he doing okay?"
"Harry?" he asks, looking a little nervous. His arms are resting crossed on the table. "Uh- yeah. He's fine. Not so sure about Sirius. He just said he's letting Harry use his tattoos as a colouring book."
You laugh. "Yeah, I can see that. He does love to colour. Have you always wanted to be a father?"
James looks stunned, but laughs it off. "Not a normal question for the first date, is it?"
"Well since you already are one," you shrug.
James thinks for a while before answering. "Yeah... I've always wanted kids... Well I'm sure you've seen from the documents I sent to the school when Harry enrolled. I'm widowed..."
You nod, you do in fact know this, you had read through those documents for every child. Understanding their family structure and dynamics can be a big help in understanding the child and improving their development in school and at home.
"She uh- had complications at birth and didn't make it." He let out a sigh and shrugged. "So now it's just me and Harry. And I wouldn't trade him for the world.
"You really love him, don't you?"
"I do."
"You know you can talk about him, right?"
James looks down and purses his lips. "It's just that... other people I've dated weren't really... keen on the fact that I have a kid. You know, another person's child and all."
You tilt your head down to try and make eye contact with him. Somehow, your hand reaches out to his. "You know that doesn't matter to me, right? I already knew you had a son, hell, I even taught him for a whole year, and I still accepted your date."
His mouth forms a small frown, but his hand grabs yours anyway. "I just didn't want to seem weird."
"You're not. Promise," you give his hand a squeeze.
"Is it too early to want to kiss you?"
You both stare at each other for a second before you burst out laughing, making him laugh too.
James starts to tell you about Harry, and visibly gets more comfortable the more he does it. He tells stories from his first words to potty fails. He shows videos and pictures. From there, the both of you fall into an easy rhythm of branching from topic to topic in your conversation. You exchange bites of your food. Before you know it, you're laughing while your meal is long done and you're both on your second cup of coffee.
For some reason, you feel an itch in your throat.
Nonchalantly, you ask, "Did your pasta have pineapple?"
"Yes, why?"
"Firstly, who the hell puts pineapple in pasta? Secondly, I think I'm having an allergic reaction."
James sits up in a panic. "Oh god- I'm so sorry-"
You cough into your first. "It's fine, it usually doesn't react as bad as it used to but I like to stay away from pineapples anyway. I'm not gonna die. Can you get me some cold water, please?"
He immediately stands up and gets you a glass from the counter. You down the glass in seconds and you feel better.
"I'm so sorry that was embarrassing-"
"You're sorry? I gave you a bite!"
"I forgot to ask, it's my fault."
He gently places a hand on your shoulder. "I'm so sorry, let me make it up to you"
"James, trust me, it's fine-"
"I'll bring you on a second date."
You furrow your brows. "You just saw me cough my lungs out from an allergic reaction and you still want to bring me out?" you can't help but laugh at the ridiculousness.
"I mean... I still find you attractive after all that so if you find me attractive after I rambled about my own child to you though you have taught him for this past year I don't see why not."
At this point, you're pretty sure your cheeks hurt from all the smiling you've been doing the entire time.
Despite your protests, James insists on driving you home. When you reach the entrance to your apartment building, he tells you to wait before rushing out of the car to open the door to the passenger's side. You giggle and take the hand he holds out to you as you step out of his car.
He tugs the hand that is holding yours to make you face him. He's so close, you're desperately hoping your cheeks don't show how flushed you are.
"So... same time next week?" you suggest.
He nods. "No pineapples this time, guaranteed."
"And you're allowed to talk about Harry."
He beams at that, looking down and letting out a sigh before looking back at you. "Is it still too early to kiss you?"
"Yes, but for now I'll give you this," you press a kiss to his cheek. You slowly walk towards your building, your arms stretching until you gently let go when you're too far away. "I'll see you next week!"
And like that, you disappear into the building. James is left standing there, still in disbelief of the entire day.
He lets out a sigh, smiling, and gets into his car. He 's so excited to tell Sirius when he gets home.
a/n: if i'm being so honest i have zero idea how most allergies work so please don't get technical with me... also!!!! thank you so much for the love on part one eek i am on a roll i'm so happy to be writing this series.
taglist: @willows-lane @celosiastarr @nsr-15
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thurio-edau · 2 days
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SBG GANG MENTAL ANALYSIS
sorry for the delay!
alright, gotta say... this one's a bit shorter. but the next will come like a train wreck i promise😇
Part 3: Ben Clark
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oh the sweet old Ben... a kind and loving soul muted away. I'm thinking of inspecting his trauma and his general actions, and give him a diagnosis which I'm sure is canon even. I'm sure everyone who knows the disorder itself is aware that Ben is, in fact, suffering from PTSD.
let's start. first, what is PTSD?
PTSD, or Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, is a mental condition where someone feels what they have previously went through in a past traumatic experience. PTSD is frequently found with flashbacks to the moment, overwhelming feelings and sudden responses. there are two types of this disorder, PTSD and C-PTSD. but we'll look in the first one for now.
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Ben has always been a really kind character. ever since the beginning. more of a 'gentle giant' type of character, though we never see him talk. he's soft, he loves to help his friends and never does anything vulgar around them, including the phantom dimension. he feels nice when he gets praised even if he doesn't show it too.
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the first time we see him getting flashbacks and his anger issues being visible is when we first see Barron's behaviour towards Logan. anything that includes actual bullying gives him flashbacks and his response is his anger issues unleashing.
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in his backstory, Ben is shown that he's more of a shy type of person, but he loves singing. because his tall and intimidating appereance doesn't match his softness, a group of dumbasses try to 'fix' him which he rejects. back when Shane strangled him, is what he gets flashbacks to. it was something that changed his entire life, he had a passion for singing but he never did with his damaged voice. god knows how many times he was hospitalized when he was going around to fights because of his outburst of rage.
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yep, rage. I'd classify his anger issues as the 'rage' type with PTSD. PTSD rage makes more sense to me than just normal anger problems. I've seen and lived with many people with anger issues, but none of them are similar to rage. anger problems in general are usually verbal, if you don't make them mad to a point they're all bark and no bite. but of course after a point the violence behind the generic anger issues can unleash (see Tyler)
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okay, back to Ben and rage. rage is an extreme condition of anger, the person gets violent and their thoughts are clouded with the rage which makes them not think before doing anything drastic. but he's not very closed off about it either, actually. the time where he accepted Aiden to do the storytelling was before the first half of season one, the gang wasn't even that close.
this means that he saw them as actual friends so early on. probably before everyone. Ashlyn took her sweet time accepting the friendship, I'm kind of sure that Aiden didn't at first (see Tyler, yet again), Tyler also definitely didn't (as said by Taylor in season two premiere) and I think Logan has attachment/trust issues but that's for later. the only other possible person that might accept the group fastly is Taylor but with Tyler's influence so close to her, there is also a chance she didn't at first.
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Ben was fine with his friends knowing his past. he put his earphones on because he didn't want to hear about it, or else he knew he'd get flashbacks yet again. I'm thinking that it could be diagnosed too. Aiden knows that it's not just a memory, it's flashbacks to Ben and he covers for him whenever he sees something that might trigger Ben. after learning the situation, Taylor also does the same. they learn the severity of his problems and are all fine with helping him.
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another thing I'm sure of is that he's extremely attached to his friends. we know that everyone is close-knit, but Ben specifically. he might not speak but that doesn't mean that he doesn't enjoy their time. he does, fully. which is I think why he/his room was... like that in the facility, without any spoilers.
to say, the gang is more than just friends to him; they're his found family, where he feels like he belongs. they don't judge him for his silence there. they understand his past. they're not scared of him just because of the way he was built and they're not going to be either.
but what about his family?
families are one of the most important part of a character and their backstory. the family is what decides how they will live, act and even feel sometimes. then what about Ben's? where were they during his backstory?
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yeah. Ben's rage causes something terrible to happen.
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but it ends better for everyone. Ben gets the therapy he needed, starts to live with Aiden, makes the gang his friends and it actually goes well.
his parents?
we meet Naomi and William during Lily's birthday.
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yes, Mike, Lily is goshdarn adorable.
first, I think Naomi and William aren't to blame. I think they did the best they could; they tried to help Ben, tried to help him get therapy, sent him to Aiden's place to help himself. then why didn't Ben's story stop?
Ben couldn't control his rage until their house got destroyed and he realized just how far it got. he sneaked out of the house, a lot of people seem to not see that detail. and they seem to be very caring, too.
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they're amazing as a whole family, to be honest. even the little Lily doesn't care about her birthday getting wrecked, because she wants to help Ben and his friends. she indirectly helped Tyler extremely well, since the sedative idea came from her in the first place.
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Naomi was the first person who brought up the whole 'we-are-seeing-phantoms' discussion and William didn't hesitate to talk about it. Naomi was also the first person to notice the phantoms when the worlds collided for a mere second.
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and Ben himself has shown completely zero negative behaviour towards them. and Lily gets treated like a princess -even if she accidentally neutered Ben-
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side note here, that Lily also really loves the family too. the way she cuddled Aiden when he died and came back was so cute to be honest.
so I don't think the family is anywhere to blame either. it was Ben who was strangled, Ben who fought, and Ben who saw therapy. the reason why I'm talking about this is because a lot of people suddenly blame a character's family when there's a problem with them.
guys. people with caring, loving families can be traumatized too. just because someone has a happy family doesn't mean they're suddenly over any trauma they live. doesn't mean everything is suddenly okay. it means that they have an accepting place to go to, a safe space. and Ben's family? I think they're just like that. they desperately try to help. help their son, their nephew and their friends. hell, Lily trying to help also speaks volumes in my opinion. their father -dilf no.2 after Mike right here- William was the one who offered the idea to get the kids saved from the centipede phantom. and to be honest? it was pretty smart.
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she also tried to prevent Emma from going mad because come on, Emma would absolutely wreck anyone if they dared blame Ashlyn for this. (still I think Jessica has to apologize for being to insensitive smh)
Naomi really seems like a sweetheart to me, I already said what to be said about William in a single very important side sentence and if there was any kind of in-family neglect Lily would also be affected. but she isn't so I think we're good? I adore the whole Ben family tho.
to wrap it all up.
Ben is suffering from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder which makes him see flashbacks and turn into a rage mode each time he is triggered due to his backstory, being bullied because he's too soft. his rage causes a gang to destroy his home (HELLO?? ARE THERE NO FUNCTIONING COPS IN THIS STOR-- oh wait it's america yea there ain't nvm) and his parents try their best. move, get Ben to therapy and let Daniel's side help him by doing stuff he loves. Ben is still trying to recover, but his flashbacks are strong due to impacting his entire life from his voice and make it difficult.
(vocal chords repair by time actually, but he hasn't been speaking for like 4 years so maybe it'd need some voice exercises until it returns to normal?? if it's just vocal chords he'd be alright. imagine if he could talk and sing normally all this time but he just didn't know. it's something between "aww poor guy :((" and "lmao"
but I don't know about voice box, can someone enlighten me on vocal chord damage vs. voice box damage? thamks)
and Lily. Lily is a cinnamon roll. no other opinions allowed.
-i wanted to make a part for Ben and Taylor but i decided wasn't fit here :P-
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marquezian · 1 day
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u guys dovis biography is just an ode to his friends and what it means to experience life together in a community 😔
"the joys of returning home again and again" "i would feel more comfortable wearing a suit if there was mud on the starched shirt" "i wish motogp was about connection" "my friends, partner and daughter are a triangle of serenity" "friends are the mirror i look into to feel normal again" "i find even my relationship with my mom is affected by my fame, which is embarrassing" "life is for the time we spend together and going grocery shopping for the meals we cook" (<- this one got me so bad bc ive noticed he Loves doing that but i thought i was reading into itttt) "what would I have become if I surrounded myself with a court of jesters who are always telling me how good and handsome i am". says that the social atmosphere of the paddock is a "mine field". "starting from universes apart, we found ourselves here [note: being motogp riders together], different but similar: shall we talk about it? listen to each other? exchange experiences?"
mentions he doesn't consider any of the other riders his friends (which he regrets! hed like that connection) but then specifically talks about marc and how what they have is also special (profound is the adjective he uses) because its a relationship you can only have with another athlete. even compares marc to his dad (huge compliment)
SAYS SOMETHING SOOOO INSANE ABOUT HIM HERE first of all this paragraph starts with "A me Marc piace. E i nostri famosi duelli del 2017 li ho interpretati anche come un modo per conoscerci meglio." ("I like Marc. And I interpreted our famous duels in 2017 as a way of getting to know each other better.") and then THIS:
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the following may contain inaccuracies: "Deep down, however, he isn't crazy either, although he tries two maneuvers [on their last lap battle in Austria 2017!] that are neither in heaven nor on earth. Theoretically, and even practically, they have no logic. Yet I don't get pissed off, [unsure what this says]. I'm rather surprised to see what he tried to do to win, a kind of "I don't believe it," an astonished curiosity at how he tried to go into unfamiliar terrain where, as a consequence, I followed. It's amazing. As if together we had dug the new seam of a mine: the gold we won't share, of course, because I will take it, however, we dig the earth together as if we were pioneers. And that can't help but create a bond, whatever it may be."
(source is his autobio "Asfalto" for all of this!)
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drivestraight · 2 days
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good morning val drivestraight I have a question for you... can you sell me on lestappen. I follow you for general attitude swag and don't really follow many max blogs (I actually found your blog after that omega George fic lol) but I feel like you of all people could make the greatest ship primer. mostly I'm not very into it bc I feel like the shared history part of it gets overblown by fandom compared to other ships, and they're friendly enough these days that I can't get hatesex vibes form it + Max comes across as really well adjusted and kind of an homeboy. so I'm like what's the hook? what do you like? what's YOUR platonic perfect idea of lestappen? I want to follow u down this road 
omg what an honor...
this isn't much of a ship primer but mostly about me talking about why i like them if that's okay <3
i agree that we overplay their shared history, but it also provides a really nice backdrop for everything they are now. they've always been in each other's lives but in a peripheral sense. and it's that sort of distanced familiarity that is compelling to me. also the potential for intense physicality despite their inability to communicate like normal people. that's the hook to me: they are in each other's orbit but they never have been close. but then you get to the racing: and when it comes to the racing, they've really given some great battles. and that alone isn't enough. it's like - combined with who they are off the track: childhood rivals turned awkward work friends, the fact that they can race that hard and that they respect one another so much is just. so good. sometimes it feels like they can predict each other's moves. like silverstone/austria 19 (yes, mentioned to hell) and bahrain/saudi 22, the w2w there went crazy. and once again, this with everything else: that they have this one place and this one medium for them to communicate at such a high level, and are just so awkward everything else is very good. lewis and seb who have said in the past that max goes over the limit too much, while charles has always said with max, it's always on the limit and never above. obviously things might change if they ever get into a real title fight against one another, but i think they have such great foundations that it will be compelling no matter what. also they've lowkey like stood the test of time: look at how people characterized them in 2019 and how they characterize them today. they've changed so much and their relationship has changed so much but still, both of them are at two top teams, they have found each other again in f1.
also aesthetically, the red/blue of it all is really nice. and just like. They look good together. yknow
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they also like. say crazy things about each other sometimes. "i will remember it all my life" / "i know max very very well" / etc. etc.
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my perfect platonic idea of lestappen Is Not one where they're best friends and where max is his number 1 defender - because he is not, as many people would have you believe (everyone clipping moments from cooldown rooms and quotes from interviews are putting it out of context and putting words in max's mouth and twisting things weirdly), and because that's frankly so uncompelling and kind of pathetic to think that charles needs max to praise him/defend him for him to have any worth as a racer etc. etc. i could go on about this for ages but i won't. tldr max doesn't care enough to do that.
IN FIC my favorite lestappen is basically: an awkward lestappen who like each other so much and can't actually communicate it properly in any way that isn't physical. but maybe the physicality and the shared history and the racing can be enough.
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calumfmu · 1 day
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steve finding out reader is expecting twins and being utterly panicked, like he needs to go see robin and eddie to talk him down because he is freaking out
Ahhhhhh I love this!!! (you know the TikTok sound 'oh my goodness I love this questiionnnnn, I think-' yeah thats me right now). 857 words cw: swearing, loser!Steve trying to get his groove back,
An ice pack was pressed to his head, Robin's chipped nail polish covered fingers holding it in place. She was mumbling something, freaking out as she stumbled over her panic, 'maybe we should call 911'.
Eddie was laughing, cold beer in one hand as he took in the sight before him. Robin taking deep breaths to calm herself down, interchangeably pressing the ice to herself and Steve, while he groaned every time it was taken away from him. A dark bruise was forming on his forehead from where he passed out in your living room.
"Isn't this the shit you've always been talking about?" Eddie asked, taking a swig of his drink.
Steve closed his eyes, a deep breath leaving him. Robin yelped, shaking his shoulder.
"Stay awake, Steve!" She hurried, squatting in front of him. Steve peeked open an eye, rolling it at her.
"I'm fine, Robin," he said, wincing at the pressure he was feeling. "Yes and no, yes because I love her and I want a soccer team-"
"Damn army at that."
"Eddie. Please," He continued, taking the pack from Robin's fingers. "I'm just going to be fucking terrible at it."
"Steve, those damn kids love you," she supplied, taking his wrist in her hand, presumably to check his vitals. "You run your own babysitting service practically, and you're amazing at it, hey, you might get your ass kicked every now and then, but they're all alive."
"Not helping," he winced, snatching his wrist from her. Eddie leaned forward in his chair, handing a lit cigarette towards the younger man. Steve would normally complain about him smoking indoors, but for right now, it was everything he needed.
"She's right, Steve," he said, watching as Steve took a long drag, shoulders relaxing at the hit. "Those kids will swear up and down that you're the best god damn thing to happen to them, whether you like it or not. You're made for this."
Steve shook his head, coughing as the hit went down the wrong pipe. "No, no, no. Man, I couldn't even get into college, and here I am, working at a movie store, with twins! Twins! Two babies! On their way!"
Eddie laughed at his urgency, reclining as he looked up at the ceiling of the Harrington home. He took a look around, humming as he found it spacious.
"I think a crib will fit perfectly right there," he pointed towards a corner, closing one eye as he envisioned it. Steve whined, sinking into the couch even further.
"My dad's going to kill me," he muttered, putting the palms of his hands over his eyes. He was never a religious man, but in this moment, he felt God in his presence. "Fuck, what if I'm like my dad? I'm going to be so shit at this, she's gonna leave me. Oh my God, I'm going to be a single dad."
"Steve!" Robin grabbed his shoulders, shaking them as he lolled his head to look at her. "Snap out of it, okay?"
Steve nodded, his bottom lip jutting out as he moped. His eyes were wide, watering slightly as he envisioned the next few months, no years, decades of his life changing.
"You're going to be the best god damn dad out there, alright? You may be a Harrington, but you're not gonna be like him," Robin held eye contact, sincere as she pressed a hand to his chest. "She loves you. You love her. The two of you are like a match made in heaven."
Eddie hummed in agreement, turning so his feet hung off the side of the lounge chair. "Or hell, if you want to look at it like that."
Robin cut him a look, gaze firm.
"Okay fine, you're made for each other, alright? There couldn't be a better duo than the two of you, and you'd need to be completely senseless to not see that," he reached out, fingers spread as he expected the cigarette back. "Trust me when I say, I think you're going to be perfect at this. You may think it's the wrong timing, but I mean, it happened for a reason."
Steve nodded, looking in between the two of them. He began to feel hopeful, figuring his two friends wouldn't lead him astray when it came to this.
"What if I am bad at it though? Even if I try?" His voice was small, fear etched into it. Robin placed a hand on his knee, squeezing lightly.
"No one's good at it, especially for the first time. What matters is trying and just being there," she said, patting at him. "Now get the hell up. Give her a call, apologize for being terrible and leaving her at her house, and make it work, Harrington."
Steve looked towards Eddie, who smiled and nodded as he agreed. Slowly standing up, he felt less shaky in his movements, redeveloping the muscle he felt he had lost earlier.
Eddie gave a toothy grin as Steve crossed the room, giddy in his steps as he made his way towards the house phone. "Just wrap it up next time, Harrington."
"Eddie!"
Masterlist! Inbox and requests are open! <3
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decepti-thots · 15 hours
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while i'm talking about Whirl, one thing i've been meaning to talk about for ages just in a 'i am aware some people may not actually know this, and it hardly gets mentioned in fandom' is that Whirl in Interiors talking about briefly trying to change his name when he was a flight instructor at the flight academy is a reference to a passage in Bullets, which is in retrospect very obviously him:
Jetstream had taught him to recognize his inherent worthlessness. In front of the other cadets he'd always been supportive, but in private he would berate him for showing off and for getting ideas above his station. “You think you're something special?” he used to say. “You think you’re better than the rest, better than me, just because you can turn a few tricks? On a good day - on your best day - I’d say you were unremarkable.” Rotorstorm’s only response to Jetstream’s verbal abuse was to make jokes. If you can make light of the situation, he'd think, it can’t be as bad as it seems. Over time, Jetstream’s verbal abuse... evolved. On one occasion, Rotorstorm was pushed against a wall. On another, he was punched to the floor. Before long, he was on the receiving end of sustained and entirely unprovoked beatings. The worst day of Rotorstorm’s life - worse than the day war was declared; worse than the day of the Simanzi Massacre - was the day the IAA installed a Cryogenic Regeneration Chamber. He couldn't remember what he’d done to deserve that night's battering, but as he lay on the floor of the aircraft hangar, his torso freshly pummeled, his spinal strut bent at a right angle and his face reduced to a shallow bowl of oil and splinters, he saw something he would never forget: Jetstream was standing over him, fists clenched and head cocked, coolly appraising his options. And the look of exhilaration on his face as he wondered where to place the next punch had been terrifying. Rotorstorm had passed out before Jetstream had finished shoveling him into the CR Chamber, and had woken up the next day without a single scratch on his body. Jetstream had left overnight; he moved to a training facility in another province and later changed his name. Since then, Rotorstorm had seen him only once: he'd been sitting in the front row when Rotorstorm had been awarded the Novic Medal for Outstanding Valor, and he’d been clapping and cheering more loudly than anyone else.
and this is a really fascinating thing to consider for me because if you just describe the whole thing briefly in the abstract, it's gonna likely sound like one of two things:
whirl tried to turn over a new leaf with a new name, and it worked for a time but ultimately he couldn't and went back to his old life
whirl tried to turn over a new leaf with a new name, but he couldn't and was just as much of an aggro wildcard as ever so gave up
but this is... kind of not either of those, including the last one? whirl IS acting like the violent, bitter, unpredictable asshole we come to meet in MTMTE and know he was during the war, to an extent, but he's also clearly succesfully keeping up something of a facade of really inhabiting that 'not Whirl, nope, i'm a Normal Flight Instructor' in public. it's only to rotorstorm he's not, seemingly. (and even then, the way rotorstorm describes him here is... really cold and deliberate in a way that feels kind of different to what we see later.)
obviously it's. i mean it's SO deeply unpleasant, very effectively communicated in terms of how awful and traumatising that kind of thing is btw a+ but also Jesus Fucking Christ, but it also suggests to me a very specific experience Whirl is having in this period of his life that isn't quite either of those obvious choices. pokes at it. god. what the fuck is going through your head you terrible helicopter you.
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Oh yeah make sure neglected people get love until that neglected person is a fucking narcissist. Cause all narcissists are bad. Everything I do is intentionally manipulative or maybe they'll say I'm not actually a narcissist and are just confused or supporting them cause I've been made to feel guilty. I've been on both sides. People will believe I'm a narcissist and so therefore I'm abusive or people will not believe I'm a narcissist cause I'm too nice and just getting caught up in narcissists manipulating me to support them.
I hate the idea that my self image is not by my choice. I will always be what OTHERS perceive me as. I have always been that and it will continue to be that. People will either see someone that can't do any wrong or someone that can only do wrong. Like stfu I am a person! I can do good and bad! I have a past of being toxic and harmful esp as a teenager cause I was a fucking mentally fucked teen still in an abusive situation.
I just. I dunno. Im waiting on food so I'm very like just ranty about everything and anything. But like. Stfu. Stfu stfu stfu stfu stfu. If anyone else is needy and needs attention or reassurance then it's fine. But I have had it demonized since my fucking childhood and had my fucking meltdowns demonized as being intentionally manipulative!!! I WAS A FIVE YEAR OLD AUTISTIC CHILD STFU!!!!!
And people praising empathy as being good piss me off. Cause you know what else can also have hypoempathy? AUTISM. Low empathy is not just an "evil" personality disorder thing. Anyone can be anywhere on the scale of empathy. And it doesn't fucking matter. And anyone can be capable of good or bad. It has literally nothing to do with narcissism or any disorder.
Like wtf are anti narcissists gonna fucking do when they realize theyve done harm??? Cause you know what being someone believing in narc abuse did to me?! It made me believe that i was justified as a victim of narcissists so therefore I couldn't be wrong in my trauma responses.
Yeah. Accepting im a narcissist did way more for helping my relationships by allowing me to understand and communicate my needs than believing in narc abuse and calling my parents narcissists ever fucking did. Wtf are they gonna do when they're told about the harm they've done??? Not even related to narc abuse. I would have horrible episodes and defended myself cause I wasn't like my abusive "narcissistic" parents. And all it did was lead to more fights and more episodes and my friend couldn't help cause they were dealing with trauma responses too (people pleasing, believing it was okay what I did or that she deserved it even when I told her not to say or believe that, it's a very lengthy explanation required thing.)
Anyone and everyone is capable of good and bad and is capable of harming others. Whether it's full on abuse, even worse things, or just being insensitive and thoughtless. Focusing so much on the big bad narcissists will only continue to focus on this "us vs them" mentality that completely negates any sort of nuance and ignores the fact that harmful people, abusers, and even the worst of humanity is ALLOWED by society. It isn't a prevalence of narcissists, it is fucking bigotry. And it is everywhere. And it allows abuse to be normalized.
Big list of things I been thinking on. Fuck fuck fuck. I'm already fucking stressed and my parents won't stfu so I can think and type. Disorganized speech, semiverbal, can't thinky think.
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It is beyond dumb and annoying as fuck when people look at characters who're in intergenerational friendships and immediately jump to pedopjacking the older character even if their dynamic is healthy because it blatantly overlooks WHY kids and adults being close friends can be bad.It's not a problem on it's own,the problem is a lot adults don't actually care about kids or are fucking ped0s and the solution isn't not let them interact except relatives fullstop,it's to teach younger how to identify predators so they can stay away from them and pretty much nobody who's insistent on the thing i'm talking about does it!In latino cultures like mine,it's normalized for children and older folks to be close even with no blood relations to form a stronger and safer community and it's also normalized to tell kids that it's wrong for adults to view them sexually(admitedly,this is sadly not universal but there's tons of latino regions where pedophiles are considered not people)
Kids and adults CAN have real friendships but it's important for the adults in them to establish proper boundries and not use the younger person as a therapist and in fact,it should be the other way around because it's the job of older people to be positive figures in younger ones lives they can count on and since i'm an eldest sibling who's always gotten along with their little siblings,i enjoy hanging out with and taking care of younger people and not expecting adult behavior from them because that's what my s/os and adult friends are for!It's also a personal thing for me because i got bullied growing up and had absolute ass adults all around me so this is my way of breaking the cycle of abuse by being the person for my bio siblings and my intergenerational friends i wished i'd had and i see the latter as my siblings too(and vice versa)since it's a culture thing i was raised in to see your friends as the same as family
'Why would an adult be close friends with a kid?That's weird!'Because kids are people with feelings and personalities of their own and not 'puritans' or 'stupid' or 'losers' or 'taking up space' or 'should know better even if they weren't taught better' and some of us reacted to experiencing child abuse by growing up to care about kids because we were once them too and the fact that you'd rather believe nobody could ever love a child in a familial way without abusive intentions says a lot about you with how you treat them in general,hope this fucking helps bitch!!!!
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