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astaroth1357 · 3 years

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How Often They Worry about MC…

For those who don’t know, I have a little dog named Charlie and she is a large portion of my world. There's no need to be alarmed, my dog is fine, but there are days where I hold her and all I can think about is how much I worry about her health down the line… I suppose we often do that for the people we love, particularly the ones who may not last as long as we will. Take that as inspiration if you'd like.

Lucifer

Near constantly.

If you tracked his blood pressure on a grid, you'd see it start to continuously rise about when he decided they were worth having in his life.

Lucifer is the eldest sibling to a whole crew of brothers so he's no stranger to worry. He worried about his brothers when they were young, he worried about them after the Fall, and he still worries about them now (even if he's less open about it).

But a part of him knows that his brothers can handle their own, at least to varying degrees. The MC, though? He's far less sure…

They've proven rather resilient, but also headstrong and reckless. Neither of which are good things to be in a place this dangerous...

If Lucifer isn't careful, he can catch himself staring at a wall or window just wondering where they are and if they're doing alright… If he called them every time he had a passing worry, their inbox would be full by the end each week.

He holds himself back because he doesn't have the time to constantly protect them, but that doesn't stop him from sending a text once or twice a day. They better respond or he'll start (secretly) panicking.

Mammon

He forgets their mortality from time to time, but every time he remembers it hits like a ton of bricks…

Mammon is a pretty "in-the-moment" person. He doesn't spend a lot of time dwelling on the future, but whenever he does the thought of losing MC always comes back to him again and again.

Like. It's gotta happen eventually, right? They're human, humans die, hell they don't even live that long to start with!

The MC can always tell when Mammon's getting worried because he'll get uncharacteristically quiet and pace around or hover by them…

Every little injury or strenuous task will suddenly seem like too much to him as well.

If they need to carry some boxes, he'll carry them all.

If they have to jog to class, he's carrying them.

If they so much as get a papercut, he'll have a heart attack.

It's not very hard to get Mammon out of these funks - he really does want them to reassure him that they're okay - but he's never going to get fully over it…

Not until he can steal whatever top secret immortality formula Solomon must have used anyway… He'll get it off that bastard eventually.

Leviathan

Thinks about it so often he has to actively try not to just to get any peace…

He dodges his fears for MC like a protagonist dodges lasting consequences. Every time he feels one creeping up, he's always got a distraction waiting…

"Hey where's MC at? I hope they didn't fall into the riv-OH HEY CHECK OUT THIS NEW GAME!!"

"What are they doing over there…? That looks hard, what if they bre-WAIT DIDN'T MY FAVORITE VOICE ACTOR JUST RELEASE A NEW PODCAST???"

"What if the MC dies tomorrow and they leave me all alo-DEVIL FIGHT 200! YOU CAN'T BEAT DEVIL FIGHT 200, LET’S BREAK MY HIGH SCORE!!"

Cut him some slack, his psyche cannot handle the idea of losing them on top of everything else he grapples with every day.

If, on the rare occasion, he does let himself fall down that rabbit hole he becomes extra clingy and practically begs MC not to leave his room… like ever. He'd bubble wrap them if he could.

Anytime they get really hurt or really sick he refuses to leave their side even if it means he has to awkwardly sit on the floor. He just needs to be able to glance at them every so often to be sure they're alive… Still breathing?? Phew…

Satan

He worries, preps, rationalizes, then worries again…

For Satan, knowledge is power and every scrap of information he can learn about MC is more power he can use to keep them safe and healthy.

Yes, he will want their medical history. Yes, he's going to need a list of prescriptions. Family members too. And no, you do not get a choice.

He'll read up on as many things as he can - pawn medical journals off of witches and get magical alternatives from Solomon.

The cycle usually goes:

1. He's lying awake at night because he just heard about some terrible bacteria that makes human's skin peel off or something.

2. He does all the research he can on this bacteria, its treatment options, best prevention methods, etc.

3. Gets right about to break out the rubber booties for MC to wear around, then realizes they have a very slim chance of catching said bacteria since it's only native to incredibly remote parts of Indonesia.

4. Feels instant relief that MC will probably not catch flesh-eating bacteria and can finally sleep again…

5. Hears of some other human medical horror from Solomon and starts to worry…

It's a vicious cycle indeed… But at least he's getting a lot of medical training. Soon enough he'll be the Devildom's version of a human vet (which I guess is just a doctor, come to think of it. 🤔)

Asmodeus

Lives so "here-and-now" that he doesn't remember often, but when he does it's always heartbreaking…

Asmo usually tries to worry about things as little as possible. It’s bad for the skin, you know? But when the MC is involved, all of that goes out the window.

Like how a delicate blossom eventually wilts in the snow, the MC is bound to leave them in time… Usually there's supposed to be something beautiful in that kind of tragedy, but perhaps he's just too close to them to find any romance in it.

The thought of their death gives him breakouts and anytime they get hurt or sick he's the first brother to offer them comfort. Every time.

Because he doesn't feel like he's as physically strong as he brothers, he tries to make up for it by minding their health in other ways. Anything to keep his MC strong and beautiful as always!

If Asmo is in a worrying mood, then he may also compensate by trying to take the MC out to a party or some fun event. Why sit around worrying by himself when he could be making memories with them now, right?

Beelzebub

It comes in waves, mostly at night.

When your thoughts throughout the day are mostly, "I wish I wasn't so hungry," it doesn't afford you a lot of time to think about much else.

In a way, it's a good thing since he experiences a lot less stress. But those worries are still there and they mostly plague his dreams…

Beel doesn’t feel hungry when he's sleeping, so a lot of his fears will make themselves known overnight. An injured or dying MC is often in his rotation of nightmares though, of course, he'd rather it not be…

After having one of these dreams, his first instinct is to always make sure the MC is okay. If they're with him, he'll hug them and check their heartbeat. If they're somewhere else, he'll go to them or shoot a text.

He has woken up without realizing his nightmare was all a dream though, and usually it's up to Belphie or MC themselves to console him while he cries… It's so heartbreaking, sweet boy just puts a lot of pressure on himself to be sure they're safe…

When he worries, it's like they're the most beautiful and expensive China set in a room full of bulls and hammers. If he could tape them to his side, he probably would. He gets scared for them that much…

Belphegor

More scared about it than anyone else in the House.

Despite his calm demeanor, Belphie is truly afraid of losing his loved ones beneath the surface… He's already lost one of his most dear siblings before, going through that again may just break him.

Unfortunately, he's also felt just how fragile the MC is firsthand... He's not even the strongest of his brothers, yet he was able to snuff them out so easily… Who's to say someone else won't try?

Like Beel, MC's death is a recurring nightmare for him but he can usually shake off his dreams fairly well, if not change them mid-sleep. More scary is when something is actually wrong with them or they're not feeling well.

Belphie always sets his inner laziness aside for the MC when he can. If they get sick, he'll usually be right along with his family to take care of them - even if he has to skip school to do so (not that he cares about class anyway).

When he's worrying about them, he tries to play it off at first, but soon enough they'll notice him acting overly concerned and losing sleep… Best to calm him down before he starts getting cranky.

#obey me #obey me shall we date #shall-we-date-obey-me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me headcanons

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hiraethenthusiast · 3 years

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"I love you most."| t.h.

pairing: actor!tom x reader

warnings: floof attack.

synopsis: tom gives you the best wedding you could've gotten. he's in love with you madly, that's what he says.

a/n: guess who wants this? i do. i absolutely adore a loving husband no matter what, and i adore heartfelt gifts even more! i hope you all like this fic, this one's really close to me! tpwk everyone!

listen to clinton kane's i guess i'm in love

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“So do you, Y/N Y/L/N take Tom as your lawfully wedded husband?” The priest asks you while you and Tom look at him with impatience in your eyes.

“I do.” You say, making everyone cheer and making Tom smile.

“And do you Tom Ho-” “I do!” He shouts before the priest could even complete his sentence, making everyone at the altar erupt into laughs.

“Let him finish bubba” You laugh along, signalling the priest to go on when Tom mutters a small ‘sorry’ to him.

“Do you, Tom Holland, take Y/N Y/L/N as your lawfully wedded wife?” He asks again, while Tom looks at you with nothing but adoration in his eyes.

“I do.” And everyone cheers once again, and you gently squeeze his hand.

“So I shall now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.” The priest says lastly before getting off the stage and as if on queue, Tom sweeps you under his arms and holds your waist before pressing his lips to yours. The moment was wholeheartedly content, his and your parents, both with tears in their eyes, even Paddy and Harry shed a few, because the moment was so pure to just not cry at. Tom kisses you as if he was the luckiest man on Earth, like he had achieved something which he thought he could never. He pulls back to look at you beaming with the biggest smile he’s seen on you in years, and smiles to himself once again.

This was the best day of both of your lives till now, and there was no doubt about it.

After 4 years of being together, Tom finally proposed to you, and then forgot where he kept the ring, but you couldn’t care less because the man you were in love with was now, going to be a forever favourite in your lives. And today, he was now your husband from your fiance, and you couldn’t be anymore happier.

You both settle down after roaming from one place to another greeting every guest that had attended your wedding, finally for a drink and some food. Harrison sits right behind you, completing the duties of best man with all his will, and you smile at him. The twins and Paddy come in a bit later, but your eyes are looking for someone else. Where’s Tom? Your question was answered when you hear the clinking of a glass, just to find your handsome husband there.

“May I have your attention please?” He looks directly at you and you blow him a kiss, him pretending to catch it making everyone laugh. Actors.

“Thank you all for attending and being a part of our very wonderful day, I swear you guys are our favourite people” He says while chuckling.

“Today is the day I married my wonderful and stunning lover, Y/N and in recognition of that, I decided to give you the best gift of this evening.” He says, making you wonder what he got for you.

“I remember when Y/N once told me that she always loves heartfelt and handmade gifts filled with love more than people buying her the gift of her choice. She likes the element of surprise, as she likes to say. So Y/N my darling, I thought you might notice and scold me for it but you didn’t, not even once in this 4 year old relationship, and trust me this is going to shock you. I’ve managed to record every important and goofy moment of our lives, from falling on a staircase to the time I proposed to you, I have it all. I’ve compiled them into one sweet video for you, while your favourite singer of them all, Mr. Clinton Kane sings a song for us! Please give him a huge round of applause!” You jerk your head to the place where Clinton enters from, and he waves at you making you wave instinctively as well.

You look back again towards Tom, who was smiling sweetly at your little fangirl moment and continues.

“I’d also like to thank Harrison and Harry for helping me edit this video, because I’m literally so dumb without anyone of these four with me.”

“Can you put the lights out and start the video please?” He asks one of the workers there at the venue, and jogs up to sit down beside you, giving you a small peck while you take a hold of his hand.

And on queue, the lights are dimmed and the video starts to play. You can hear the faint strumming of the guitar that Clinton is currently playing, but you aren’t able to identify the song just yet. You look ahead towards the screen, and your eyes light up when you see Tom dressed up in his wedding tuxedo, you finally realising that this bit was filmed just a few hours ago.

“Hello my lovely wife! Well, I’m filming this part before the ceremony starts but I think I’m pretty certain on showing you this video after we’re married. This was...boring. Anyways, I hope you enjoy the video my love, and don’t hit me when we get home! I love you so so so much, enjoy!” He says before shutting off his camera, while everyone laughs at his goofiness and you glare at him playfully. The video rolls again and you look forward, but suddenly realise the song. It’s ‘I Guess I’m In Love’, you say to yourself. Tom had proposed to you after a few days when the song came out, and somehow on the night of him proposing, this song was played. You labelled it ‘our song’ and he happily obliged.

“Haz hold the camera correctly for god's sake...” You hear your husband’s voice and move your head towards the screen, smiling brightly.

“Oh I’m obsessed. With the way your head is laying on my chest.” Clinton starts, immediately soothed by the presence of your lover and the melody in your ears.

“I am holding the camera nicely mate bugger off! Nikki taught me well!” Harrison says in the background making everyone giggle.

“She’s coming shut up”

“What’s this Tom?” You ask him, as he looks at you like a kid in love.

“Y/N”

“Tom” You say in the same manner, feeling anxious by the second.

“So we’ve been dating for 4 years and trust me those have been the most beautiful four years of my life. I know this is so out of the blue, but Y/N Y/L/N, will you do the favour of marrying the person who loves you immensely? A.k.a. Tom?" He says and you laugh. You hold on for a few seconds, looking in his eyes which were filled with desperation.

"Yes" You say and his face lights up like a Christmas tree. He can't stop beaming and searches for the ring in his pocket, only to find out that he didn't have it.

"Oh I'm a mess. When I overthink the little things in my head."

"I have the ring I promise." He says, moving frantically.

"Tom-"

"I swear I kept the ring in my pocket-"

"Tom-"

"How can I be this stupid you probably don't want to marry me anymore-"

"TOM!" He jerks his head towards you as you shout his name.

"It's okay. I just want you right now." You say and he immediately hugs you, the tightest of them all.

The clip ends and you knew the tears were coming very soon, Tom senses the action and rubs your knuckles., giving you a hearty smile.

The second clip rolls in soon, your eyes brightening almost instantly.

"You seem to always help me catch my breath. But then I lose it again, when I look at you, that's the end."

"Why the hell are we on the top of the Eiffel Tower? And why do you want your phone to crash?" You ask him, while he struggles to make a video with his phone while the winds roar at the top of the monument.

"Because I want to remember this moment!" He shouts, making you smile even more.

"My goof"

"Your goof"

"You're lucky I love you"

"I wouldn't have it any other way darling" He says and gives you a quick peck on the lips, this moment too pure to realise.

"Why do I get so nervous when I look into your eyes? And butterflies can't stop me falling for you."

"Now we may invite, a very handsome young lad, who happens to be Spiderman, Mr. Tom Holland!" Harry shouts in the video, while you all pretended to have a grand gala when you couldn't attend Tom's premiere.

He walks in wearing a black tuxedo, his shirt buttons open from the top, looking dashing.

"Thank you for inviting Harold, but please, call the star of today's night." Tom says, making everyone groan about how in love he was with you.

"Patience Thomas. Now may I present, the queen of today's night, Ms. Y/N Y/L/N!" Everyone applauds as you walk down the stairs as you hear your name. You reach the door wearing a red and black dress, the clothing complementing your body more than ever. Everyone seems to keep clapping but your attention is towards that one dummy, who's standing like he's seen a ghost.

"..Oh wow." He's speechless, and everyone knows it. You blush at your boyfriend's gesture and nudge him in the shoulder, as a signal to stop staring.

"I hope you all understand that I scored a jackpot, thank you" He sees and everybody laughs.

You laugh along with the other guests, remembering the faint memory from over two years back. This was one of the most fun nights you've had with Tom. While you laugh at the clip, all Tom can do is stare at you in awe. How did he get so lucky, he thinks. He watches how your face glows when you see someone happy on the screen. He truly was blessed.

"And darling this is more than anything I've felt before. You're everything that I want, but I didn't think I'd find. Someone who was worth the wait of all the years of my heartbreak. But I know now I've found the one I love."

"Please don't go" You sniffle on Tom's shoulder, asking him to stay one last time before his flight leaves for Atlanta.

"If it was in my hands darling I'd never leave your side." He says, trying to hold back tears.

"It's okay, I understand." You say, pulling back and clearing your throat.

"Awh Y/N please don't cry." Tom tries to persuade his emotions by telling you to stop, but a tear falls down his cheeks in an instant.

"I'm sorry." You say, chuckling lightly, making Tom chuckle too.

"I'll be back before you know it."

"I know you will be"

"Please board the flight for Atlanta which leaves at 1330 hours" The flight attendant announces, and you know it's time to let him go.

"Come back home to me soon okay?" You say, wiping your tears.

"As soon as possible"

"I love you" He says.

"I love you more."

"I love you most." You can't argue with that now.

"Bye bubba" You say, giving him one last kiss, a very long one indeed, that left you both searching for oxygen.

"Bye darling" And he leaves to board his flight. You look in the same direction until he disappears and you turn around.

"Harrison, are you crying?"

"No-" He sniffles and you laugh.

You knew you were going to cry as soon as you saw the location. This was one of the hardest moments of your life, letting your lover go away from you for so long, and you weren't ready for that. You wiped your tears while Tom rubbed your hand with one of his, the other cleaning his tear stained face. You look back to see Harrison crying once again, and you laugh a bit at him before giving him your hand for comfort. He really was the best man. You blow a kiss to your family and Tom's, who were currently high on emotions. Even the brothers had tears in their eyes. You really did get the best family.

"And I love the way. You can never find the right things to say. And you can't sit still an hour in the day. I'm so in love, let's run away because us is enough."

The rest of the video were some clips of you and Tom being goofy and so in love, which were a delight to watch. The song played in the background, adding its own special touch, which was necessary to bind this moment together. All these moments which Tom managed to shoot secretly were a lifelong reminder of how much your person loved you. He loved you.

And that is all you need.

The video gets over and Tom looks at you with puppy eyes.

"So, how was it?"

"You're the reason my makeup is ruined and I have mascara stains" You say, laughing while crying.

"That good, huh?"

"That good." You say and he pulls you in for a hug and kisses your forehead.

"I love you bubba"

"I love you more" He says, kissing your cheek.

"I love you most."

He couldn't argue with that.

"But I know now I've found the one I love."

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tagging some friends who'd like to read!

@evanssimpybaby @hollandsmushroom @tomsoxytocin @scarletspideyy @leafy-holland @t-lostinworlds

#tom holland angst #tom holland gifs #tom holland x reader #x reader #tom holland and reader #tom holland smut #tom holland #fluff #romantic #wedding #love #holland and co #cute as a button every single one of you #raya writes #raya is a mohmaya

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extraintrovertedalien · 3 years

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It hurts a little bit too much

'It’s time to grow up. I’m finally doing something that people enjoy! Something that people take time to pay attention to! Why can’t you understand that!'

Au August

Day/Prompt: Day 2 - Acting

Ship: Prinxiety, brief platonic moxiety

Word count: 1780

Cw: swearing / yelling (I'm sorry) / self-deprecation / crying / La la Land spoilers? (some people haven't watched it)

A/N: This is solely based on La La Land but I changed a few things that may change the direction of the story than what was actually in the film and this is my first time writing something angsty so forgive me angst gods </3 Also, Roman wants to be a Broadway actor but signed as a pop band singer instead. Virgil is still like Mia but not as headstrong

@tsshipmonth2020

Virgil has been with Roman for quite a while now. Roman has recently signed a contract for a pop band with his old friend, Janus, despite their doubt about the guy. Virgil wasn’t exactly pleased with what he witnessed when he was invited to one of his partner’s concerts. With the single confused tear left on the venue floor, Virgil has been worried since then about what Roman has gotten himself into.

~*~*~

Virgil was returning home after his dinner out with his friend, Patton; the only person keeping him stable since Roman left for… Boston? Maybe Dallas? He stopped keeping track a while ago.

When he reached the porch of their apartment, he hears the faint instrumental of ‘Only Us’ playing inside. He continues inside to see his partner setting up the table, his back facing him. “Roman?” The man suddenly drops the pot he’s holding on the table and turns to him. Roman let out a sigh of relief before flashing a small endearing smile to Virgil. “Surprise?” The taller man says in a small breathy voice, almost a whisper. “I have to leave in the morning but, I just had to see you,” he continues.

Virgil freezes for a moment before rushing to Roman, dropping everything he’s carrying, wrapping his arms around the other’s neck to kiss him. Roman wraps his arms around Virgil’s waist to keep them steady.

~*~*~

“I’m so glad to be home,” The taller man says with a smile. “Stay,” Virgil replies with a hopeful look; only to be returned with the same look from the other.

The pair are now seated at the dining table across from each other, instrumental music playing in the background.

“How’s your play? Hope you’re not too nervous,” Roman breathes out as he notices the other’s mood shift as he mentions the play. “You know me. I’m nervous about everything,” Virgil jokes with a chuckle. “Plus, what if people show up? I’m gonna perform in front of them. They’ll think I’m terrible,”

“Fuck ‘em” They laugh a little before Roman continues, ”They should be lucky to see it. It’s gonna be incredible. YOU’RE gonna be incredible. I can’t wait.” Virgil looks down on his food with a sad smile.

“I have to leave early tomorrow,” As much as Roman thinks that the statement sounds wrong when it left his lips, he doesn’t want Virgil to worry. “Boise, right?” Virgil inquires still looking at his food. Roman hums in agreement and continues, “You should come,”

“Wish I could. I still have to rehearse cuz’, we’re not all gifted in acting like a certain prince-like man I know,” Virgil teases with a smile. Roman chuckles, “Well, if you wanted me to help you, you could’ve just said so, darling,”

“I guess it’ll have to wait until you’re done with the tour,” Virgil replies with a forced smile. Roman’s face falls. “When are you done?” Virgil continues. “Uhm. Well, we’re only touring so we can make the record. After we’re done, we’re gonna record then, we go back to tour that record…” He trails off.

Virgil processes this information and decides to just let his brain talk. His heart is too soft for this conversation but, it can’t continue hurting for months. Or years.

“Do you like it?” Roman was caught off guard with the question and was confused with what Virgil meant. “The music, the band, the tour, singing on stage. Do you like it?” Virgil clarifies.

“I…” he trails off. “I don’t know how it matters,” Roman doesn’t like where this is going. All this time. All this touring. He thought it was what Virgil wanted him to do. Roman looks Virgil in the eyes, “Do you like the music?”

“I do. I just didn’t think you did…” The pair fell in uncomfortable silence, letting Virgil’s last statement linger between them.

“Why are you doing this? I thought you wanted me to do this. This is what we’ve been waiting for,” Roman is deep into confusion at this point. He’s been in this band for a while, he just wants to know why Virgil hasn’t anything before he signed on the dotted line that would seal his life.

Virgil sighed, “I just wanted to know where you’re theatre is gonna fit into all of this.” He said in such a small voice that, Roman wanted to just sweep Virgil off his feet to make everything better again. “There’s a reason why there are no theatres here because no one is like me. No one likes musicals here. Not even you,” Roman explained.

Virgil can’t take how pathetic Roman thinks of this entire situation. Yes, it’s Virgil that usually overthinks these things and, it’s not entirely impossible for Roman to as well but, this is just pure non-sense to Virgil. “I do like them now, because of you!” He blurted out with a slightly raised voice.

“Well, what am I supposed to do? Wait for you to be successful only for me to build something no one likes? It- It’s time to grow up. I’m finally doing something that people enjoy! Something that people take time to pay attention to! Why can’t you understand that!” Roman exclaimed, determined for Virgil to understand his point of view, not bothering to look at the other.

“Since when did you care about being liked? Why do you care so much about being liked-”

“You’re not an actor! How would you know?!” Roman immediately regrets his statement, knowing he doesn’t mean it. To him, Virgil is the greatest actor he has ever seen and, nothing would ever change that. He glances at Virgil and, sees the destruction his statement has caused slowly unfolding.

“No. No- I- I didn’t mean that, Virgil. I’m sorry. I promise it’s not true-” he tried to reverse his mistake but, to Virgil, the destruction has always been always there, this was just what he needed for everything to fall apart.

“Maybe you just liked me because I made you feel like a better actor,” Virgil stated blandly in a matter-of-fact manner. Roman knew that he was never better than Virgil, as an actor or not. He was heartbroken to hear that his partner thinks that he was just being used. His statement earlier was just a slip-up but this… What Virgil’s feeling is all his fault.

“Are you kidding?” Roman can’t bear to lose someone that he loves so much. Tears well up in his eyes, tempting to let them fall.

“No,” Virgil calmly replied, keeping a stern face.

Both of them, heartbroken, stared at each other, not letting go of what’s left between them.

But before any of them could say anything, Roman’s phone, which he left in the kitchen, rang. His ringtone echoing through the apartment. Roman sighs at the sound but doesn’t stand up. However, Virgil does and eyes for the door. Roman stays frozen for a moment before going after Virgil.

“Virgil, wait-” before he could continue, Virgil had already slammed the door.

~*~*~

You guys can use your imagination to fill in what happens after the argument up to before the next part.

But, if you haven’t watched La La Land, basically, Virgil did the one-man play and Roman didn’t show up and only a few people show up then, he goes back home to his parents in a different state, leaving everything behind. I think that’s all you need to know??

~*~*~

It’s been a few weeks since Virgil came home to his parents. He was devastated to see his old stuff and how hopeful he was to become an actor. Yet, he can’t bring himself to take it all down.

Virgil had abandoned his phone and his laptop to the very back of his closet and sticks to using his mp3 in the meantime. He has been needing some time to rethink his life decisions before facing the real world again. Leaving Roman to pick up whatever he left in Los Angeles.

He was finally enjoying peace and quiet for the first time in a while, until…

HHHHHHHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

~*~*~

“The fuck are you doing here?!” Virgil whisper-yelled as he walked towards the man, wondering what’s so important that Roman had to follow him all the way to another state.

“Thomas Sanders. The casting director. He was at your play-” Roman began. Just at the mention of the name, Virgil had become more troubled but hopeful at the same time.

“And he loved it so much, he wants you to audition for this HUGE-” Roman stated as he slammed his hand on his car for emphasis, startling Virgil a little. ”-huge movie that he’s got,” He continued with visible excitement.

Virgil shook his head with a little chuckle before running his hand over his mouth, “I- I can’t- I’m not going to that- That.. will kill me,” he continues to shake his head.

“WHAT?!” Roman exclaims, startling Virgil again. “What?! Shh shh! You have to be quiet cuz’ if my neighbors don’t call the police on you, I will,” He attempts to calm Roman down. “No. You have to make sense. You can’t stay here and be miserable for the rest of your life. You need to be reasonable here,” Roman persists.

“Because it’s just another goddamn audition!” Virgil explodes with all the hurt and anger he’s gathered through the years of auditioning for shows. “I’ve been to hundreds of auditions and it’s just the same thing over and over again! I’m sick of it! Yeah, sure, I get callbacks but, where does it end? Another fucking rejection! All of those countless hours of waiting for the phone to ring. Be- because maybe I’m not good enough,” Virgil pauses.

“I’ve been wanting this for years. And, now... Now that I don’t want it anymore. Now that I gave up on it. Another one fucking presents itself to what? Another rejection? I’m- I’m not giving myself another heartbreak, Roman. It hurts a little bit too much,” Virgil admits, already crying. It hurts Roman to see Virgil this way. He’s seen Virgil become so passionate about his play, he needs to let him see that this is not ‘just another audition,’ it’s the reward his hard work is all for. He needs to know.

“You’re a baby,” Roman bluntly states. “Maybe I am,” He couldn’t continue arguing anymore. “But, you said it’s time to grow up. And, I’m doing that so, why won’t you help me?” Virgil continues.

“You have an audition at 5:30. I’ll pick you up at 8,” as much as Roman wants Virgil to grab this chance, he can’t force him to if he doesn’t really want to. He loves him too much for that. At least he tried. “You’ll be out front or not. I don’t know,” Roman continues as he gets in his car and drives off, leaving Virgil standing in the middle of the road, staring at the library in front of him. The library that once helped him set his path to acting.

~*~*~

Perhaps Virgil was out front at 7:30 and got accepted in the audition.

Perhaps he wasn’t.

Told ya I'm not good at angst ;-;

#TSSAUgust #sanders sides #sanders sides fic #sanders sides au #thomas sanders #virgil sanders #roman sanders #ts virgil #ts roman #prinxiety #ts prinxiety #em writes

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fireemblems24 · 4 years

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Flame Emperor Reveal Analysis

This game is all over the place with this. This level delivered some of the most intense and emotional moments so far, but doesn’t always capitalize on character development and conflict.

I’m playing all four routes in Fire Emblem Three Houses mostly blind. Below is spoilers for all four routes (which I’m learning the names of now). And for the first it’s actually 4!

Crimson Flower & Silver Snow

I lied. Originally I planned on writing a different analysis for Crimson Flower and Silver Snow, but the build up is the same. Only the fallout is different, and yeah there’s a lot to say about how things played out.

The Black Eagles routes have the biggest advantage for this scene because your main character is the Flame Emperor. It does not hold back. All of your students, sans Edelgard and Hubert, are terrified, confused, and hurt. None of them grasp fully what’s going on when Edelgard takes her mask off and orders her army to kill anyone who stands against her. The voice actors do a fantastic job here: Dorothea, Caspar, Bernadetta, and others sell the mess of emotions the Black Eagles experience, and Edelgard sounds stone-cold and in-command. Her betrayal is the gut-punch it should be.

The level presents a no-win scenario. One of your students is willing to kill you and everyone else you’re supposed to protect, and Rhea is out for blood. No matter what happens, no matter what you do, you lose. It’s a heartbreaking, emotional mess of a situation the writing sets up.

Even prior to all this, the dance between revealing to much or to little about Edelgard’s true intentions is fantastic. Where the Blue Lions basically dumps the answer in your lap and the Golden Deer gives little to no hints at the Flame Emperor’s identity, the Black Eagles is the only route where I do not know if I would’ve guessed correctly or had so few clues that I didn’t bother trying to guess.

Edelgard drops enough hints to guess correctly if you’re looking for them. She always questions Byleth about his thoughts on the Flame Emperor, trying to drive a wedge between the Emperor and the heinous actions the masked knight is involved in. Likewise, Edelgard constantly asks Byleth if he’d pick her over the whole world. She also makes alarming declarations that tow the line between reformer and despot. All of these actions make sense in retrospect - she was fishing to see who would and would not side with her regardless of her actions.

The scene in the Holy Tomb builds up to a crescendo, Edelgard is defeated, and Rhea makes her demand to kill Edelgard. It’s a bit telling Rhea needed to go so extreme in order to make siding with Edelgard believable, but it’s counteracted by the game going as far as making Edelgard an enemy unit who can and will kill her classmates. Both women resort to extremes. Rhea is emotional, hateful, and screaming for blood. Edelgard is cold, calculated, and resorting to using victims of human experimentation to kill her own friends. These are two driven, passionate women exposing their ugliest sides in an emotional scene ripe for fantastic character development and conflict.

And then . . . the wrap-up.

Silver Snow

Should you choose to kill Edelgard, you land in Silver Snow. Rhea’s angry rant against Edelgard is fantastically delivered and makes me anticipate further development from her character. Back in Garreg Mach Monastery, Rhea juxtaposes her earlier scene for a softer one. She implies a willingness to sacrifice her life to protect her home, and asks Byleth to take her role should something happen to her. Rhea’s plan all along was to put Byleth (who is connected to Sothis, who is connected to Rhea, though the details are still unknown to me) in charge. After hearing Rhea call for blood, it’s a sweet scene between Byleth and the archbishop. The problem with it is that every route gets these scenes sans Crimson Flower. It’s two great scenes for Rhea, but not unique to Silver Snow.

And here’s the weird part - there is no unique content for Rhea outside of a few initial lines when choosing to kill Edelgard. Instead, we get the Black Eagles upset and unsure about Edelgard’s actions, a few wondering how much she planned all along and how involved she was in every horrible thing that happened during their school year. It’s necessary, but there’s nothing stand-out in anyone’s dialogue to bring home a real gut-punch.

Seteth gets the best unique content in Silver Snow when he offers the Black Eagles a chance to defect to the Empire should they desire. It’s delivered softly with no threat behind it, showing an earnest desire for the students to feel comfortable even if it means they’re going to turn around and try to slaughter him in thanks. Thankfully, none of the students leave. Cyril and Catherine automatically join your team, and Hilda is now recruitable as well to make up for losing Hubert and Edelgard.

The fall out for choosing to stand against Edelgard is . . . fine. For such a unique event in Fire Emblem (siding against your lord, possibly losing two units you’ve heavily invested in should you not know what’s coming), I expected a bit more drama and flare and a lot more Rhea. However, this is only the start, and it gave what it needed to give.

The stage has been well set. Everyone’s in a no-win situation. Should they lose, they and everyone else in Fodlan will suffer an all-out, dragged-out war. They’ll lose their school and have to fight against their home country (sans Petra) where most of their family and friends live. Killing Edelgard ends the conflict, but she is their former friend, classmate, and rightful leader. She gives them no choice - fight for me or die standing against me. Neither option will leave Byleth and the remaining students wholly satisfied, so I foresee more bittersweet confrontations coming, and I look forward to it.

Crimson Flower

Deciding to protect Edelgard lands you on the Crimson Flower path. I have to say, I’ve read and watched thousands of stories and this one scene stands out among all others.

Never in my life have I ever seen characters react to a situation in a way that makes less sense. Even more baffling is how much potential gets tossed out the window. Stories thrive on conflict and character development and this scene is ripe with potential, but instead of even letting the fruit grow rancid they just . . . act like it never existed.

After Byleth picks to guard Edelgard, Rhea loses it and is ready to tear Byleth to pieces before turning into a dragon. The Black Eagles and Edelgard all run away and, not long after, make it back to Enbarr safely. How they escaped a rampaging dragon or successfully fled Garreg Mach is hand-waved away. This is the kind of hand-waving I can forgive. It’s lazy writing, but it doesn’t really impede the story. What I cannot forgive is the hand-waving that comes next.

Edelgard has a brief scene where she tells her classmates her intentions - she wants to rid Fodlan of the Church of Serios’s control, claims that Rhea and her fellow beasts have secretly ruled humanity and held them back, and is going to declare war. She asks who will join her. Predictably, all of them do - except Flayn. Edelgard mentions that Flayn has opted not to stay with the group.

Hmmm. I wonder why. Could it be Edelgard’s lackey kidnapped and tortured her for a whole month, preparing her for blood experiments at the hands of an evil group of mages who just happen to be Edelgard’s allies? Maybe that had something to do with it. The fact the game presents this is as some magnanimous act is hilarious. I believe Edelgard would let someone like, say Petra, turn away too, but she deserves no “brownie points” for allowing someone who she allowed to get tortured and set-up for a slow death as a human sacrifice to leave and not decide to attack her the home where her father still lives. I think this aspect of Edelgard’s character would’ve hit home significantly harder if someone who wasn’t so throughly victimized by Edelgard’s actions had fled, or you actually saw Flayn leave.

No one asks about the Death Knight. No one asks about Flayn’s kidnapping. No one asks about Kostas attempting to kill students. No one asks about the students kidnapped and experimented on or Remire Village or Jeralt. No one asks where the Crest Beasts Edelgard is using came from. No one asks about the fact she just tried to kill all of them, or what she’s going to do with the Crest Stones. No one even mentions the Flame Emperor. No one questions the history she spilled on them, claiming the church was behind the splitting of Fodlan despite not even having enough knights to guard their own monastery and needed students to help out at events.

I could buy the Black Eagles running away with Edelgard. The scene where Byleth chooses Rhea or Edelgard is highly emotional. Things happen quickly and no one is given much of a chance to process anything. Rhea doesn’t give anyone much of a choice by shifting into a dragon. I wish they didn’t rely so much on “Rhea bad” to make any sense of siding with Edelgard, but it is believable. What I cannot buy is how no one questions anything afterwards.

It’s like the whole cast just forgot the first eleven chapters. No one even mentions the Flame Emperor’s existence. The moment the mask came off, it ceased to exist. Everyone mindlessly believes everything Edelgard says, and no one even asks any questions - not about Rhea, not about the history of Fodlan, not about the Flame Emperor’s actions. Barely anyone bats an eyelash at the idea of attacking their own school and killing former classmates, teachers, and friends. Everyone comes across borderline brainwashed. Did the writers have so little faith in Edelgard’s position they were afraid to even attempt exploring it? Even worse is the strategy meeting is just Edelgard, Hubert, and Byleth - the Black Eagles are no where to be seen. It makes them come across like mindless puppets rather than anyone remotely rational - like pawns arranged on a board required for gameplay reasons than actual characters.

Never in my life have I seen a story throw away so much potential character development and conflict. The situation here is intriguing. Edelgard’s stance is fascinating, but everything falls short when all that’s interesting about it is getting tossed out the window because Rhea is secretly evil and nothing Edelgard did beforehand seems to matter anymore. I am seriously concerned about where this route is heading, because despite the massive potential, it seems like it cares less about that and more about making sure Edelgard looks good rather than complex and interesting, even at the cost of logic, character development, and by turning other interesting characters black so Edelgard has someone she can look better than in comparison rather than standing on her own ideals.

Verdant Wind

Am I correct in assuming the fandom consensus is that Verdant Wind had the least impactful Flame Emperor reveal? Because it did.

Edelgard had little to no presence in Verdant Wind. Outside of pre and post class vs class battle banter, her only scene consisted of interrogating Claude and getting and giving no answers. Claude has no connection to Edelgard and neither does Byleth or any of the Golden Deer. When the mask comes off and it’s her face behind it, there’s no emotional response.

The fallout is equally lackluster. Claude demands answers from Edelgard, which she refuses to answer, and she warps away. Afterwards, things play out the same way they do on every route. And that’s the core issue here. Claude and the Golden Deer bring nothing unique to this scene. Elements of surprise that Edelgard is the Flame Emperor, her willingness to kill all your units to get crest stones, and her declaration of war is there on every route. Claude’s character and goals have had no impact on the plot.

Analyzing this scene has brought to light my main issue with the Verdant Wind route thus far. It’s that Claude and friends have done nothing to move the plot forward. Things just happen; no character is making anything happen. You could argue it’s the same for the Azure Moon route, but Dimitri’s clearly defined goals and emotional connection makes it a streamlined story with a sense of forward progression instead of plot points getting dumped in the player’s lap.

It’s too bad, because Verdant Wind could’ve approached this differently. Instead of Claude getting nothing done and shouting about every relic that showed up, he and Byleth could’ve solved mysteries together a la Nancy Drew and the Hardy Boy. For all of Claude’s questioning everything, very little attention was paid to unmasking the Flame Emperor. Verdant Wind guided its players to look at the wrong mysteries - mysteries that ultimately got no answers while ignoring the one part one was actually about figuring out, and if this was flipped, Verdant Wind would’ve had a much more impactful Flame Emperor reveal.

I will give Verdant Wind major bonus points though. It is nice to see a character question Edelgard about her involvement in things. Dimitri’s too caught up in his Duscur trauma (which I don’t believe Edelgard participated in) and neither Silver Snow and especially Crimson Flower question Edelgard’s actions as the Flame Emperor, but Claude throws at her all the questions I wanted to hear: what about Flayn? What about Jeralt? What about Remire? So congrats Claude, you’re the only character and the only route that’s holding Edelgard actually responsible for her actual actions. If only she was the mystery you were investigating instead of one that went exactly no where for eleven straight chapters.

Azure Moon

What’s interesting here is that the Flame Emperor’s reveal is less about who the mystery person is and more about our protagonist’s, Dimitri’s, reaction to it. And that is core reason behind this scene’s success.

Multiple users on here told me to play chapter eleven of Blue Lions first, and I’m both glad and upset I listened to them. Glad, because they were all right, this route had by far the best Flame Emperor reveal, but sad because it all went downhill from there.

The Crimson Flower/Silver Snow routes should’ve had the best Flame Emperor reveal. After all, those are the routes where Edelgard plays the biggest role, but the follow up to the scene is fairly lackluster, especially in Crimson Flower. Azure Moon, on the other hand, did everything Crimson Flower was afraid to - address the elephant in the room.

Characters in Crimson Flower respond to the situation as if Edelgard didn’t just try to kill all of them, nor do they ask any questions about her actions as the Flame Emperor. Everyone acts as if none of that ever happened, and by not bothering to even mention it, those actions stick out even worse than they would’ve otherwise.

The opposite is true in Azure Moon. Everyone is unnerved by Dimitri’s violent outburst. Felix jumps at the chance to tell everyone, “I told you so.” No one knows what to do about Dimitri, nor do they really have time to process anything with Edelgard’s war machine knocking on their front door. However, this is the base expectation of a story - that characters respond realistically to what happened prior instead of teleporting to some surreal dimension where Edelgard isn’t working with people who perform human experimentation.

So what exactly did Azure Moon do to make this reveal so successful? It utilized the route’s unique aspects: Dimitri’s mental instability and desire for revenge, terrible family history, and emotional connection to Edelgard.

Unlike Verdant Wind, Edelgard has an actual presence and relevance in Azure Moon thanks to her connection to Dimitri. He cares about her like family, which makes her betrayal more personal and automatically more impactful than in Verdant Wind. Even more brilliant here is milking the emotional aspect of what happened. Instead of focusing on “shocking” the reader with Edelgard’s betrayal, it drops hints about her secret identity with all the subtly of a lead brick.

You know what inevitable, dramatic, and tragic outcome is coming. Edelgard, Dimitri’s only remaining family (outside of an uncle he’s on bad terms with), is working hand-in-hand with the people who caused the deaths of his family which led to the genocide of a race of people and the source all of his trauma. Dimitri makes it quite clear he’s out for revenge, and that anything related to Duscur triggers his PTSD so bad it seems like a dissociative or psychotic episode. Azure Moon does not build up a mystery, it builds up an emotional conflict - like watching a train wreck that you know is coming and can’t stop.

And that’s the brilliance of it - this scene isn’t about Edelgard being the Flame Emperor, we already know that, it’s about Dimitri, who this route is about and who the player is emotionally invested in during this version of the story.

Nor does this game disappoint here. There’s no softening anything to try and make Dimitri look “better.” He has a full-on violent breakdown. It’s devastating. He is succumbing fully to his demons after fighting against it over and over while getting tossed into triggering situations ad nauseam and getting no help in return (after all, therapy, medication, hell even the concept of mental illness simply doesn’t exist). All the signs that the route has built up explode in an emotional scene, and probably thee best cut scene so far with some of the best voice acting in Fire Emblem to carry it out. Every plot thread comes to a head: Dimitri’s lust for revenge, his unstable mental health, the mystery of the Flame Emperor’s identity, etc . . .

The upcoming battle has more meaning now. It has what is at steak in the other routes - win or lose and the fear of having to kill former classmates - and more. Because it isn’t just about the battle of Edelgard vs the world, but also the battle for Dimitri’s mental health and for his soul. There’s a bit of a catch-22 here, is Edelgard dying really the best ending? Killing her saves many lives, but at the cost of Dimitri’s mental health? What if she dies and he doesn’t kill her, but what if he does? Would he kill himself now that the dead are avenged? Or what if she lives and this drags on longer? No option is good. There isn’t an easy win button by offing Edelgard or taking over the school. Every possible ending is a bad ending. Your lead character is in the middle of a mental breakdown, and giving into his demons and lust for revenge (which is a separate issue exasperated by ill mental health) and the situation only makes it worse and is to dire to properly let anyone deal with said breakdown. The tension, the drama, the sense of foreboding dread, is all so much more here than in all the other routes.

What makes Azure Moon’s handling of the Flame Emperor so good is that it widely succeeded where the other two routes failed. Verdant Wind didn’t make the reveal relevant to anything Claude was interested in or working towards. Crimson Flower completely and utterly failed to address Edelgard’s actions let alone use that to create compelling tension. Azure Moon did both. It made the Flame Emperor reveal relevant to the route, even made it actually about the main character of the route. Nor is it shying away from conflict and tension, even if it means letting it’s main character fall out of grace and risking the player’s infatuation/admiration/whatever with/of Dimitri by having him succumb to his dark side. Because it’s not protecting him, he’s going to turn out a way better character for it.

I will admit though, that I think playing all four routes impacted this a bit. It didn’t benefit Azure Moon, but I think this route spoiling who the Flame Emperor is hurt the other routes. Verdant Wind might’ve had at least some tiny smudge of an impact because it’s the only route where there’s very little way to correctly guess who the Flame Emperor is - the only one where it may be truly a surprise. Crimson Flower/Silver Snow does make it a bit more obvious, but doesn’t quite spell it out for you the way Azure Moon does. Here, the player kind of has to be looking for it. Obviously though, you can only learn this once, and good writing could’ve made all the routes impactful with very small tweaks - have Verdant Wind actually focus on the mystery that’s solved at the end of Part 1 (who is the Flame Emperor) and actually have characters react to and get answers about Edelgard’s actions. I also think the choice between Silver Snow and Crimson Flower looses its tension when you go into it knowing you’ll pick both. Azure Moon easily had the best reveal, so I want to ultimately thank everyone who told me to do this one first - you were all very, very right.

#fire emblem #Fire Emblem Three Houses #fire emblem 3 houses #fe16 #fe3h #am #cf #ss #vw

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jazy3 · 3 years

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Thoughts on Grey’s Anatomy: 17X3

SPOILERS AHEAD!!!

I liked this episode, but nothing beats that Premiere. I mean Wow! This episode for me felt very much like a continuation of the two part Premiere. It was confirmed that Meredith has COVID-19 (!) and we got to see how she’s doing and where her treatment is at. My best friend who I watch with pointed out that some of the treatments they mention are things that health care workers were trying in the early days of the pandemic that we now know aren’t very effective. It’s interesting to see the doctors work through this process as it would have happened for health care workers at the time.

We get to see Derek Shepherd again which is always a treat! His words confirm that the beach Meredith is on is some kind of limbo and that her reaching Derek will mean she had died and is transitioning into the afterlife. Derek tells her she can’t reach him because she’s worried about the kids and how reuniting with him means leaving their children behind. My guess is that she’s going to code in an upcoming episode and will reunite and talk to Derek once that happens and then they’ll resuscitate her and she’ll come back to the land of the living.

I loved how Derek kept saying the sand wasn’t real and then Meredith ran to him and tripped and fell and she called him on it and he laughed. Classic Derek. He loves her, but he was also kind of an asshole at times and that was so him. I loved the scene with Bailey and Meredith and that we got an Alex reference. God I miss him. I got the Meredith and Richard scene I’ve been hoping for! That I felt like was missing last season and in the premiere. It was so sweet.

I think Meredith made the right choice with her Medical Power of Attorney (POA). Richard loves her enough to do everything to save her, but is clear headed and wise enough to respect her wishes if she becomes too far gone. I loved his joke about it being pay back for what he did years earlier. I loved the conversation she had with Hayes too! When Maggie asks if he wants her to say Hi he says no and jokes that he wouldn't her to think she’s special and we later see that Hayes does that so that he can visit Meredith in person and talk to her through video outside her window.

I had a moment where I thought that Meredith might make Hayes her POA, but then he made the comment about how you don’t want it to be a family member or someone who loves you so much that they’ll do anything to keep you alive. It should be someone who can be objective and respect your wishes. Hayes cares deeply for Meredith and if it were him he’d do everything to keep her alive no matter what and I love that implication from their conversation. I love how he told her all the reasons people fear and respect her and how the disease had nothing on her. So great! I love their interactions so much.

I liked that she asked him about Abigail because we’ve seen him ask her about Derek and her past relationships and it’s been implied they’ve talked about his, but this is the first instance we see on screen. Through this interaction we learn more about his wife too. He called her Abby and when she was sick with cancer her sister was her POA and made them do everything they could to save her even though Hayes and his boys objected. Which is interesting considering on her death bed Abigail described her sister as crazy, but not a bad person and made Hayes promise to let the boys see her. I’m guessing she didn’t want to put Hayes through having to make those decisions for her.

We also get to see Hayes and Maggie interact for the first time! We see that like Amelia, Maggie is a fan. She knows about his feelings for Meredith and their relationship and is supportive. Which is more than anyone else except Derek ever got from anyone in Meredith’s life so major points there. The interactions between Maggie and Winston we’re very sweet and I love how they comforted each other and the shot where they made it look like they were on opposite sides of the wall was very cool.

Some great acting on the part of Kelly McCreary in that closet scene! I felt her heartbreak. I’m disappointed we didn’t get more Meredith and Hayes scenes and that we haven’t gotten any explicit romantic content from them so far this season. I love a slow burn as much as the next person, but after watching Meredith jump feet first into relationships with men who turned out to be her boss, married, engaged to someone who wasn’t actually dead, her student, or that she wasn’t ready for only to have those relationships completely blow up in her face I want to see her in a healthy committed relationship with an actual grown up.

Hayes is that person and while I loved their slow burn last season I really wish they would pick up the pace here. I love seeing their relationship develop, but at this point they’ve established that they are good friends who have a lot in common and are able to talk openly about their kids, dead spouses, past partners, and problems. Hayes has made it clear he’s interested in her romantically and Meredith appears to reciprocate his feelings, but it feels like those feelings are just under the surface of their interactions and I’m starting to get a bit frustrated.

There are multiple romantic plot points I could have done without over the years with regards to Meredith’s storyline. This is one that I really want to see and I wish they would hurry up. I did like the mention of how Meredith will have to quarantine at a hotel for at least two weeks after she’s discharged. I’d love for Hayes to be the person she quarantines with and see them spend some time alone together and I think there’s great potential there.

I loved that we got to see a scene with Meredith and Ellis! She’s so cute! Bailey and Ellis are starting to talk more as characters and we’re getting more insight into who these kids are which is great! Up until recently we only really got a feel for who Zola was. I love also that they’re finding ways to do it that keep the child actors who play them safe while incorporating moments with them.

I love seeing Richard step into the Chiefs role. He’ll be great in it and can really help Grey Sloan and the other Catherine Fox hospitals through this. I liked his speech to Tom although he didn’t seem to take it to heart. It was also cool to see him give a speech to the new interns that they introduced. It’s not his usual speech because these are not usual times and I like that they reflected that. Also, Sandy from ER is one of the new interns and I love that. My best friend and I have spotted a lot of cameos in this season of Grey’s so far from other long running shows which is really cool.

Tom was floundering again this episode and I feel like they might be moving towards wrapping up his storyline because if him and Teddy aren’t getting back together, which appears to be the case, and with Amelia on maternity leave there’s no real story for him. Since it’s now been revealed that he has COVID-19 they could choose to kill him off or have him recover and return to where he was working prior to moving to Seattle. It was heartbreaking to watch Amelia and Maggie worry over Meredith. Especially Amelia knowing that losing her sister who was also Derek’s beloved wife could compromise her sobriety that she has worked so hard to achieve and maintain.

I liked the scenes with Amelia and Link, but it’s starting to feel a little gratuitous with the sex angle I think because none of the other characters are able to do that right now. We got some nice Jo and Link interactions. It was nice to see Link back in the OR. It was also nice to see Jackson remember he has a kid and talk about Harriet! We get some updates about his co-parenting situation with April and Matthew and that he doesn’t get to see Harriet as much as he’d like because he’s picking up more COVID shifts than April is. He likes Matthew, but he’s irked when Harriet says that he cuts her sandwiches better and I mean fair.

We see that DeLuca is wearing a yellow scrub cover whereas the Attending Physicians are wearing dark blue and the new interns are wearing light blue. This appears to confirm that he’s doing his Fellowship as otherwise their scrub covers would be the same colour. He spends the episode following Teddy around which seems to imply that he might be doing a Fellowship under her. Which would explain why Meredith didn’t know about it as she and Teddy aren’t super close and Meredith is presumably on Owen’s side in the fallout of Teddy’s affair being made public. Still, we’ve never seen DeLuca take any interest in Cardio or have any scenes with Teddy prior to this so it’s unclear.

I feel like the actor who plays DeLuca must have some kind of personal connection to someone who works behind the scenes on the show because at this point his character doesn’t really serve any real purpose in terms of the plot. His character doesn’t move any of the other characters storylines forward and you could remove him from Seasons 15, 16, and 17 and it wouldn’t affect the story at all. Prior to that his character served a purpose in Maggie, Alex, Jo, and Amelia’s storylines, but that ended in Season 15.

Since then we’ve seen him creepily pursue Meredith, date her largely off screen, and then get sick with Bipolar Disorder. That’s it and none of those plots affected the larger story of the show in any major way because they made it clear through dialogue that DeLuca isn’t part of the gang and the other characters don’t like him and simply tolerate his presence. Now they’re having him follow Teddy around and help treat Meredith off screen. It’s like they’re grasping at straws. His character serves no purpose at this point so I’m confused as to why they haven’t written him off. Maybe they will in the second half of the season?

In the Promo for next week they tease that there’s something else on that beach that’s a familiar face. Someone Meredith has lost that’s passed on and that they’re hanging out at the outpost we see on the beach. My money is on George O’Malley.

Until next time!

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wearetakingthehobbitstogallifrey · 4 years

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Kdrama recs Part 2

Hello @camsthisky and anyone else who cares! I do apologize for the delay on this post--it has only been 84 years since Part I of my kdrama recs, I know, and I thought about going for a full century but this is me finding a way to de-stress after watching the first episode of I-Land alkdjfadlksj I’m gonna die of heartbreak but whatever

Speaking of heartbreak, there is a lot to be found in Korea’s wonderful historical dramas, so like, be warned—or, if you are an angst-loving monster like me, settle down for hot guys and good cries

Let us begin! (or, if you want romantic modern dramas see Part 1)

1. Scarlet Heart Ryeo/Moonlovers:

aha ahahahahahaha *weeps* You may have heard people talk about this show. You may have heard ME talk about this show. This thing was my first kdrama ever and it RUINED ME

Disclaimer: I have seen this show once and rewatched it twice and on the rewatches I can never quite make myself watch the last 4 or 5 episodes because things get tragic and messy and I get mad. HOWEVER there is a lot of good in the first part of the show and because this thing was all the rage in everywhere but Korea itself, there’s like over 300 fanfic for it and several good fix-its, including one by my good friend @thelonelybrilliance

Ok so anyway this show which could also be called An Abundance of Princes starts with a young woman from modern times getting thrown back into ancient Goryeo during an eclipse and finds herself in the body of Hae Soo, the cousin of the wife of one of the princes, and thus she gets embroiled in royal affairs which are, quite frankly, a mess. See, the evil eyeliner prince (whom I love even when he’s the worst) is plotting with his mom to get the Crown Prince out of the way aka dead BUT who should return to the Palace but the 4th Prince, Wang So, who has spent at least half his life living as hostage to a powerful family.

So has a scar that cuts across his eye and which in this society makes him a horror to look at or smthing idk he just looks extra hot to me but anyway he wears a mask and is known as the wolf dog (or as the MURDER ANGST CUPCAKE thanks @abadpoetwithdreams). He might seem a little rough around the edges at first because his life has been hell but he really just wants to love and be loved okay people need to be nice to him wtf

Other princes include:

1. the Crown Prince, Wang Mu, a good egg, not particularly charismatic but he tried to protect his lil bro when no one else would

2. the 8th prince, Wang Wook, who reminds me of a fellow named Shane and I don’t mean the cowboy

3. the 10th prince, Wang Eun, a dumb adorable spoiled bby (played by Baekhyun from EXO)

4. the 13th prince, Baek Ah, a tol soft boi, an artist, a BAE, a BRO, a SHIPPER ON DECK

5. the 14th prince, Wang Jung this son will fight everyone he’ll fight himself he just loves to fight! Not always wise but he’s a good boy and I like him a lot

6. just realized I skipped the 9th prince but nobody cares

One quick note is that IU plays Hae Soo, and I enjoy her a lot in the first half of the show where she is still spunky and rebellious...sadly her character kind of falls apart/gets too weak for my liking as the episodes progress

The MAIN reason why I feel it my duty to recommend this show to everyone despite the fact I have never met anyone who wasn’t traumatized by it is LEE JOON GI

Yes, this man:

I mentioned him in the previous rec post—he played Bong Sang Pil in Lawless Lawyer (AND IS NOW CURRENTLY STARRING IN FLOWER OF EVIL WHICH WILL BE ON ANOTHER POST AHDFOIASDHGALDSKJF FRIQ I AM IN LOVE WITH THAT MAN)

BUT SERIOUSLY LOOK AT HIS PHOENIX EYES!!! HIS RAZOR SHARP FEATURES! HIS BIG ADORABLE EARS! HIS BEAUTIFUL EXCESSIVE BANGS! 4TH PRINCE WANG SO LOVE OF MY LIFE

SOMEONE PROTECT THIS BBY

2. Hwarang: Ok so right off the bat I am going to smack down a disclaimer that I can’t stand the female lead. TRULY CANNOT. Thus, I don’t like the romance, and only care about the love triangle as far as it just shows how sad and lonely one of the guys is. (Also there are scenes of dumb old men plotting and I don’t like them either). At the end of the show, I am happy that the one guy is NOT stuck with the female lead as his wife. Good for you sir

Sounds like a show to steer clear of then, right? WRONG. This is a show that you skip through because the scenes that are good? Are GREAT

Picture this: It is the Silla era of Korea, and the queen is ruling as regent in place of her son, who has been hiding all his life because everyone wants to kill him. Well, son is now grown and must soon come into the light and take the throne. Queen who both wants her son as king but also really likes being queen decides to do everyone a favor and form an elite fighting squad out of all the prettiest and most talented sons of nobles in the land, with the idea that they will be loyal only to the throne, and thereby keep their dads from plotting to destroy everything.

Let me tell you something, these ARE the prettiest boys in the land. Good hair, good jawlines, beautiful smiles—the cast lineup includes Park Hyung Sik and his cute lil elf ear, Park Seo Joon, Taehyung (yes from BTS!), and Choi Minho from Shinee, plus two other actors who are lesser known but who are drop-dead gorgeous. Anyway. Sorry, but they really are all beautiful.

The fun thing is they don’t all get along right away, a few of them are VERY much opposed to the other for various reasons, but they all have to bond and become brothers in arms. And what they don’t know is that the real king snuck in and is one of them. 10/10 I would die for the boys! (also Tae has an older half-brother who is a lower rank than him but whom he looks up to and that makes for cuteness and pain) Once you skip the boring or annoying parts of the show, the rest has so much delight, laughter, and oops pain, lots of pain. I want to go re-watch.

Two other things I should mention about the show: a super soft side romance between secondary characters and a game of, as they call it in the show, HOT SOCCER

^pretty boy 1 (with the cute elf ear sadly on the other side of his head)

^pretty boy 2 (sad cheekbone bby) and pretty boy 3 (happy cheekbone bby)

^pretty boy 4 (the prettiest of them all, and he knows it!)

^pretty boy 5 (aka Taehyung danced around the set of a historical drama and made everyone adopt him as their bby)

3. Faith/The Great Doctor: This is a longer kdrama at 24 episodes and they didn’t have much of a budget so special effects aren’t the best or anything but I just got really attached to all the characters? This is another modern girl goes back in time but UNLIKE SHR it actually has a happy ending, so if you need a historical drama cleanse after that tearjerker/enrager, this could be it for you

Eun Soo has to navigate the ancient kingdom, keep people believing she is a heavenly doctor with special powers, and keep Choi Young alive so he can fulfill his promise of returning her to her own time. The problem with that is Choi Young does have kind of a death wish because of reasons—

Eun Soo is a plastic surgeon who would really like a rich handsome husband one day but them’s the breaks for you, aka she has had no luck in that department. Back in ancient Korea, Choi Young (played by Lee Minho in sadly the only role I really love him in) is a high-ranking beloved captain who can fall asleep anywhere. Oh he can also make electricity with his hands! :D

The story begins when the sleepy sad captain tries to escort the new king and queen to their palace. This was during the time period when ancient Korea was basically a puppet kingdom/tributary of ancient China (Yuan). The king (who is very smol and lacks confidence, but still has a good heart for his country) lived as a hostage in Yuan for many years, and his wise tol queen is a princess of that land, and someone needs to sit them down and make them talk because they actually love each other a lot. Anyway, when the queen gets injured by assassins, Choi Young goes searching for a legendary doctor, winds up in modern Korea, and steals both Eun Soo and a SWAT shield, because hey, it looked cool I guess

Lots of fun things in the show: Choi Young has a crew of soldiers who are BEYOND loyal to him, and while he doesn’t think much of the king at first because he’s been burned by kings before, they slowly become bros and shippers on deck for each other. Eun Soo does not lose her spunk or loyalty unlike other people I could mention *cough*HaeSoofromScarletHeartRyeo*, and it cracks me up when she curses people out. There are also a bunch of people (mostly bad guys) running around with special powers or gifts, including a flame lady and a flute boy, and the latter wears delightful anime wigs, keeps his sword in his flute, and plays his flute to kill—literally! I love flute boy very much

sorry it’s black and white but DO YOU SEE THE SWAT SHIELD

4. My Country: A New Age:

ANGST ANGST ANGST PAAAAAIN BUT ALSO BEST INTRO BEST FAVES BEST ACTORS

Picture this: two young men, who both hail from childhoods of trauma, who grew up together and are best friends, and who are tragically forced apart and end up on opposite sides of a conflict that threatens to upend the current rule of the kingdom. This IS the star-crossed brotp you’ve been waiting for!

Seo Hwi is the son of a general who died a criminal, and all he wants is to live simply and earn enough rice take care of his younger sister, who has seizures and a sweet crush on Hwi’s bestie. Hwi is the best softest most loyal boy with a good and true heart, a great deal of courage, and a talent for wielding a sword, and just wait till you see the best one-shot fight scene ever of him in battle, it is INCREDIBLE! (He is played by Yang Se Jong, who I now want to see more of) Hwi has an abundance of charisma points in that he picks up a small band of loyal soldier friends and they become the best little found family, lots of brotp-ness in this crew—do not mess with any of them because they will all FIGHT you

Seon Ho meanwhile is the illegitimate despised son of a powerful nobleman, only tolerated because the legitimate son died. Seon Ho loves his friend and is very protective of his friend’s little sister who crushes on him but his dad is a high class grade A power-hungry jerk and that causes complications of course. Seon Ho also has a good heart, he’s a gentle soul really, but he always gets stuck in bad positions and unfortunately makes a couple of difficult/bad choices so he hardens himself as much as he can but the consequences always kill him and he just wants to save his friends and destroy his dad and the stupid hierarchy that treats bastards as lesser. WHY IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?

Seon Ho he is played by Woo Do Hwan who has so much talent I die so many times over in this show just because of the way he portrays Seon Ho like that sad sad boy is one of my favorite characters evER! Is he problematic? At times maybe but I am HERE for him he just needs LOVE AND AFFECTION AND AN ABUNDANCE OF GOOD FRIENDS BUT INSTEAD (SOMETIMES THRU HIS OWN FAULT BUT HE ADMITS THAT) HE JUST SUFFERS AND SO I SUFFERRRR

*grabs a towel and dries up my tears*

Hwi also falls in love with a woman named Hui Jae (or was it Hee Jae i can’t remember) and they are very cute together, she’s pretty cool but the show’s one failing is arguably that they kind of underuse her in the plot as the story goes on? But I still like her and she still has a good role, and she is both brave and kind and not afraid to step in or tell people off, also keep a weather eye open for patching up scenes!

Oh yeah, eVERYONE in this gets hurt/stabbed/shot/bloody, such a shame they have to take their shirts off to clean and bandage the wounds ;)

Last character I must mention is Bang Won, played by Jang Hyuk in his second interpretation of the historical figure. Bang Won is the fifth? son of the guy who becomes emperor/king, and he has his own plans for the country, so when Hwi catches his eye, he recruits him to his cause. What you need to know about him is that he has issues with his dad, is slightly unhinged, and cannot and should not be parted from the fan that he constantly carries around with him. Gotta say, Jang Hyuk is FANTASTIC (heheheheheheh) in the role, able to convey all kinds of emotion in the rise and fall of his voice, in the tilt of his head, the tears of his eyes, the flick of his fan. Give this actor all the awards!

To sum up: if you like to cry for days after watching a drama, if you like excellent heart-wrenching brotps, if you like conflicted characters, if you like amazing music and setting and plot, if you like guys with good hair and arm muscles (and

abs, thank you shirtless scenes what) this show is a Must Watch

DID I SAY STAR-CROSSED BROTP I MEANT SWORD-CROSSED BROTP ADKJFADLSKJFLKJDFALKDGKLJL </3

Ok I was going to leave the historical drama post at this for now but...I’m going to cheat a little and include the one historical C!drama I just finished.Yes folks I am talking about:

5. Nirvana in Fire:

Ok so maybe the switch from kdrama to cdrama makes you uncertain. Maybe the fact that this show has FIFTY-FOUR EPISODES makes you go hell no I don’t have enough time for that. Well if you overlook this show for those reasons, you are making, and I do not exaggerate, the greatest mistake of your show-watching life!

Look, first, this drama has one of the best, most intricate, most satisfying plots in history, with like 20 characters you would die for, and second, the episodes are only about 42 minutes each, which is shorter than most kdrama episodes, so you can deal.

Once upon a time there was a general/family who were just too good to exist in corrupt old China, so naturally they were framed for treason and there was a giant massacre and everybody died, including the eldest prince who was like um dad maybe this is all a horrible mistake and the king was like no u are the mistake. Sad times.

One of the many younger princes named Jing (A NOBLE HEART, if not always the cleverest) returns home from wherever he was, finds out that not only did his prince brother die, but so did his best friend/brother in the whole wide world, Lin Shu, son of the general. Because he insists on the innocence of said bros/family, Jing becomes an outcast prince and is shuffled off to fight in wars where he can’t cause any trouble. Meanwhile, Princess Nihuang, Lin Shu’s brave, awesome, amazing, wise, incredible girlfriend, refuses to marry anyone else, and because she is too cool to be messed with, nobody tries to banish her

Cut to I think eleven years later, when the two most powerful princes are vying to be the crown prince and heir to the throne. They both try to recruit the aid of a renowned clever and sassy strategist named Mei Changsu, to help them with plotting and PR and such.

Well little do they know that Mei Changsu is actually the not-dead Lin Shu, with a completely new face (for reasons), and that Mei Changsu is a chess master setting up a long con for the dual purpose of obtaining revenge/justice for the dead and of raising Prince Jing to the throne, since Prince Jing is the only man with a good enough heart and strong enough will to make China a better place for all the people. But just to make it hard on everybody, Mei Changsu is dead set on not telling anyone who he really is—again, for reasons. He is not always successful in keeping his secret.

I literally don’t know what else to say because there is so MUCH to say, so many characters to love, and I mean LOVE. How do you get a cast this good? How is everyone so different yet so important? How do you feel bad for the emperor even when he’s slimy? How do you have to stop yourself from rooting for the prince who would destroy some of your faves? I can’t praise the charisma and acting talent in this show enough! And the music! IS GORGEOUS!

1 strategist too sassy for his own good and too clever for everyone else’s good + 1 prince who loves his mom and his dead best friend and his dead older brother more than anything else in the world + 1 gentle wise mom + 1 eternally loyal princess who would defend her loved ones with the sword if necessary + 1 sassy Elrond healer man + 1 grumpy sulky baby who loves being a better fighter than almost everyone + 1 loyal to the death, brave badass general who is going to have a stress breakdown if the strategist doesn’t take better care of himself + not 1 but 2 good boys who deserve to be protected but who are willing to throw themselves into battle if necessary + 1 antagonist tiger prince who I love and am not ashamed to say it = THE BEST OF TIMES

^he hardly ever wears his hair down but when he does <33333333

*checks calendar* how soon is too soon rewatch something, asking for a friend

#kdrama recommendations #scarlet heart ryeo #hwarang #faith: the great doctor #my country: the new age #nirvana in fire #my kdrama recs #historical kdramas #plus one cdrama #i went overboard on gifs sorry not sorry

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vaguely-gestures-to-the-void · 3 years

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Hindsight: My thoughts on Loki (2021)

Welcome back folks. Read the innocence dying inside me as I accept that this show eats my expectations for lunch and leaves me like it's going to buy milk.

As a side note from what I said in my first review, here’s an interesting article. Apparently I was clowning because the Gobi desert scene was filmed (probably? idk) with the tech from the Mandalorian. I think the studios were the same. Oh well. https://www.atlasofwonders.com/2021/06/loki-filming-locations.html

Episode 4: THE NEXUS EVENT

Pre-title scene

The new perspective of Asgard is incredible.

Oh baby Sylvie, what did they do to you. Also, RAVONNA??

The TVA through a child’s eyes is heartbreaking. The mixed use of shots that were familiar (the feet walking into the TVA) and new (the TVA logo on the floor) convey how though routine, this is an alien experience for Sylvie.

She too wants to help the man being dragged in. Maybe Sylvie was a better person than Loki, the TVA taking her away was what changed it.

We don’t see Casey, but iIt’s the same ‘sign here’ guy. The changing perspective and music really alters the mood created, contrasting the whimsical procedure we followed in episode one.

She hadn’t even said much in her life. They knew how to influence the audience’s emotions, that's for sure. Props to the actress, I felt genuine concern for her before I remembered that she’s acting.

TVA

Ravonna probably underestimated Sylvie as a Loki, a mistake that cost her greatly.

The golden doors.

Ravonna looks tense and a bit fearful.

Scattered throughout the episode are eyes watching. George Orwell’s 1984, anyone?

Big Brother is watching.

Mobius! He’s a good friend to Ravonna, but there’s a power imbalance.

Ravonna is shaken. Her past failure is haunting her.

Someone edit the “What? How?” into “Wow.” It’ll be a service.

Lamentis - 1

Loki’s apology and Sylvie reflecting on her childhood are the conclusion to the previous episode. Faced with death, Loki realises that her goals were hindered by his actions. His apology is the first time he acknowledges he had something to do with it. Sylvie’s offering her emotional vulnerability in the form of memories. Her mind and experiences are her most prized possession because they’re all she has of the person who she was as Loki, her childhood and what she was supposed to be. Her glorious purpose, what really makes a Loki a ‘Loki’ was her life.

THEY TRUST EACH OTHER. THIS WAS WHAT CAUSED THE NEXUS EVENT.

C H A R A C T E R D E V E L O P M E N T.

Ravonna pointed out that Loki will always be a “lying scourge” but they went against this. In any timeline, this could cause a nexus event. They found a middle ground.

“That should be setting off alarms if someone steps on the wrong leaf.” I had a whole idea about entropy and the timeline being an isolated system but I struggled to define an isolated system, and thus I couldn’t use the whole irreversible process causing entropy to grow causing a br- if you have a clue of what I’m going on about, or want to know more, I’ll explain my thoughts. I can understand why this isn’t scientifically accurate and I’m no physicist.

The unbranched timeline means all the things that were speculated - Wanda’s kids, what happened on Saakar, all of it - is gone.

“Any news on C - 20?”I called it! B-15 is having doubts! Her subtle unease building up throughout the ep is perfect!

Most settlements have a street design that can be from space. Sharru doesn’t.

“No. We may lose... ...you’re amazing!” Damn it literally took the end of a world for Loki to change as a person.

“Their smiles. If that isn’t people accepting their deaths I don’t know what is. Man, I just want both of them to be happy.

Please don’t let that be the love theme, it’s so pretty.

The music fading into the TVA theme as they get separated is so sad.

Time Theater 25

Back to square one in terms of trust with these two, but now they have history and hurt feelings too!

Oh Mobius.

Cycles are a part of who Loki is within Norse mythology (from what I know, correct me if I’m wrong). This scene is conflict.

Loki needs both Mobius and Sylvie to incite change. One can empathise whilst the other believes in him.

Mobius believes in Loki like no one else in the TVA. He treats him like an individual, they developed a bond in episode 2, so his disappointment and anger were genuine. This is reflected in their dialogue.

Even when Loki was going through all the Feels in ep 1, he didn’t shout at Mobius. It makes it more heartbreaking when Mobius laughs and dismisses him after the “TVA is lying to you” thing. His laugh was so bitter, it’s like his belief that Loki would be the variant to prove that variants were individuals had been shattered. What Mobius doesn’t realise is that Loki was genuinely trying to warn him. The trust between them was fragile but Mobius needed to come to his own conclusions before he could see that Loki had broken out of the mold the Time Keepers set for him.

“Just kind of an asshole and a bad friend.” Y’all, Mobius doesn’t rise to Loki’s baits. He’s so hurt.

I can’t be the only one that thought Loki was going to be brainwashed when they saw the red door. Turns out it’s just a time cell.

I love Mobius but he makes me feel so conflicted. Oh shit, he’s my problematic fave.

Watching Loki get his ass handed to him by Lady Sif shouldn’t be this funny.

This particular memory reflects what Mobius will talk about later, Loki being abandon by the people around him.

Putting Loki through a memory that was physically and emotionally painful was nasty. If you hear something horrible, over and over especially from a friend it would take a toll on your self-perception. Mobius was hurt by Loki leaving him, he’s getting revenge whilst doing his job and getting into Loki’s head.

Ravonna’s office

Ravonna has hang ups from failing with Sylvie. Who she is and what she knows is going to be interesting.

Heck I just realised are Mobius’ lapels not real? They look fake.

I wonder whether the “mastermind” thing was foreshadowing the next ep.

Am I the only one who thinks this isn’t the first Loki Mobius has dealt with? Could that mean there’s a reunion next ep?!

“Variant pet.” There’s a culture of dehumanising variants within the TVA.

The cuts showing both B-15 and Mobius’ faces reminds me of ep 1, but now there’s a new angle to things. B-15 certainly sees things differently.

Time Theatre 25

Lady Sif would kill with short hair. Or long hair. It’s Lady Sif, she’s a badass.

Loki’s exhale reminds me of how he tenses before a fight.

Notable things about this scene:

Heavy use of metaphors to trade jabs.

The lights are shifting in a consistent pattern, scanning the room almost.

Shots are constantly moving and cutting.

Loki’s speech pattern changes when he’s lying. Nice touch there.

When they start arguing in earnest, the shots are close ups of their faces, not circling around each other.

Loki was at first willing to talk to Mobius if he was treated with respect, the way they engaged in episode 2. He also wants to trust that Mobius won’t kill him. Mobius dismisses him (rightly so, his trust is gone) and Loki’s pride about ‘not working for anyone’ gets in the way rather than listening to each other. Loki’s behaviour is cyclic and his lying about Sylvie affirms Mobius’s understanding that Loki won’t (or maybe can’t) change. I wouldn’t be too surprised if Mobius is a Loki, the man’s uncannily good at reading him. He deduces that Loki and Sylvie have a bond and unsettles Loki to get answers out of him, because he knows that’s the only way he can force Loki to reveal his cards. He definitely wasn’t expecting Loki’s earlier admission to be the truth. What Mobius did was not right, but it sure was effective.

“No. Not partners.” I believe this. They had an understanding, but their goals differ. Maybe just give Sylvie her own show.

“Guess you don’t do partners.” MOBIUS WHY ARE YOU SO BUTT-HURT? Probably to make Loki feel bad ik, but it’s still funny to think Lightning McQueen is salty.

That memory really hurt Loki. He stuttered.

Loki fixates on Sylvie rather than his own freedom. This was the cue to Mobius to start interrogating.

Bruh, the feeling they were experiencing better be friendship.

This made me uncomfortable because I was so sure we weren’t gonna get a romantic subplot that I related the characters to my actual family relationships. Marvel. Why?

The music combined with Mobius’ subtle shift in demeanor from irritated to mockery was very unsettling to me. I never realised how good an actor Owen Wilson was.

“Our interests are aligned.” Once Mobius tells him the truth, Loki does the same. I really hope this is the extent of their relationship. Just let them recognise one another as equals. Please Marvel.

Mobius’ hands twitching, the slight swallow. Yeesh, he certainly doesn’t think Loki’s lying, but he’s not about to accept it.

Loki’s head shake is sad. He knows he can’t convince Mobius.

“That I can respect. I mean the lies you tell yourself.” This was the best writing imo. Loki doesn’t make any final attempts to connive his way out of the situation because telling the truth to someone he’d trusted had failed. He willingly walks into the Time Cell.

Time Theater 47

B-15 being unable to support herself, having to rely on the structures around her to stay upright. This woman deserves so much y’all.

WE NEED HER NAME MARVEL.

You better appreciate her beyond shipping her with Sylvie or istg.

The music is so mournful. It just emphasises how much everything changing is going to hurt not only the main characters. Lives change because of the TVA and the events of this episode, it’s not overlooked by the writing or music.

The poster and the 1984 parallels. Exquisite!

Sylvie not sitting straight made me snort.

Ravonna Renslayer’s office

More Theremin music! This time I’m pretty sure it’s Carnival of the Animals, XIII. Le Cygne (the Swan) : Le carnaval des animaux: No. 12, Le cygne (arr. For theremin and piano) by Clara Rockmore.

Fun fact! Clara Rockmore influenced theremin music and the instrument and was a virtuoso of the instrument. Give her a google, it’s worth it. Also look up Leon Theremin, he was (among other things) a Soviet spy. There’s a great Wiki spiral for anyone there.

Mobius was probably being lined up for a high position in the TVA. Damn.

TemPads are personal, or have different levels of clearance.

Mobius didn’t stop interrogating Ravonna throughout that scene. He knew that she wasn’t telling him the whole truth.

Sleight of hand wasn’t shown how Loki and Sylvie do it, they didn’t use misdirection.

Ravonna knows something is up with Mobius. Maybe he hasn’t been around for long if this is his ‘career case’.

The pacing becomes really fast like in the end of episode 2 as conflicts get resolved. Buckle up comrades.

2050 Roxxcart Disaster

I don’t have much to add, it’s a powerful scene.

They use close ups whenever a truth bombshell is dropped.

The music varies considerably between these scenes, each one has a different tone.

“We’re the same.” With what she knows of B-15, Sylvie knew not to be smug when delivering the news about B-15’s life.

B-15 crying in the rain hurts.

“I looked happy.”

TVA archives, Time Cell, Time Theater 25

The floor opposite Mobius is FE3, above it is 3FG.

Oh Mobius.

C-20 deserved better, I'd love to see her later in the series.

The music goes from mournful to harsh and we’re left in silence when it cuts to the Time Cell.

“You told me to shut up.” Loki can be salty sometimes.

“Do you really think you deserve to be alone?” Mobius is rattled, he wants to unsettle Loki.

The music starts to build somewhere between “...your connection... “ and Loki saying “‘WE?’”

The faint tinkling reminds me of the Avatar (blue people) score.

“How about the word of a friend?” This is Loki’s olive branch. When he admits Loki was right, their trust is tentatively reinstated.

The music is finally back to that chaotic theme we know. I think it’s the TVA’s theme.

“You can be whoever, whatever you wanna be, even someone good. I mean just in case anyone ever told you different.” Mobius corrects what he says in the first ep.

They are friends y’all I’m so sad.

Mobius can lie through his teeth like it’s nobody’s business.

Pruning hurts, Mobius’ face is in agony.

Loki’s tears. GIVE THEM ALL JETSKIS.

Ravonna takes a moment to compose herself.

Time Keepers (the final smackdown)

Why are the last 10 minutes always so insane?

Loki’s eyes only show hurt. I’ll leave.

Ravonna’s so sharp, she instantly catches Sylvie’s wet hair.

All of our expectations from the trailers always get yeeted out of a window because the scenes are never really what we think they are. I get that that should be expected but it’s refreshing that the writing is never what we think it is.

Did anyone else notice the egg timer/infinity sign murals on one of the hallways to the left of Sylvie?

Ravonna is so cold (and yet I’d simp for her).

The M.C. Escher staircases I see you set designers/CGI folks.

B-15 just gets knocked out. They better not kill her for no reason or I riot.

I’m pretty sure that Sylvie ripped off one of Ravonna’s TVA badges (or buttons) when she fought her.

Sylvie’s the better fighter, she’s had to use it more often though.

The elevator doors stay open.

It would be so funny if we get an elevator scene where Sylvie is just dragging Ravonna somewhere.

They really led us on with the Time Keepers, particularly the middle one. I was somewhat convinced there’d be something more to it. I’m interested to see where it goes.

Ep 4 review

I really don’t have much to add with these last two episodes. I’ve definitely come to appreciate that no matter whether you liked the writing of the show or not, it’s never what you expect. Is that a good thing? I guess that that remains to be seen. Nonetheless, I appreciate how much effort went into this series. It’s been a fun romp, I’ll be back with my reviews of the final episodes. I’ll also stop posting Loki content to my blog because the Gods know that my followers don’t read this lol.

I’m just going to survive until the season is over and then hopefully keep my sanity together until the next Marvel content or at least Dr. Strange.

Here's the link to my episode 3 review.

Thank you all for being here, you're wonderful my loves.

#loki #loki series #loki review #loki (2021)#loki spoilers #spoilers #man how is this fandom gonna cope? By fixating on other TV shows? Good luck lads.#I'm gonna go buy milk at this point #they better not mess with B-15 or istg #B-15 deserves none of this #give mobius a jetski #and give loki therapy #and Sylvie too pls my babies need rest.#boy if Mobius is a Loki variant I'm going to grab my popcorn because the circus that this fandom will turn into will be legendary

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thecatprince · 4 years

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Roman vs Catra

A comparison and additional thoughts by me

Disclaimer: I am only on s4 of She-Ra at the moment, and so all of this is an observation from s1-4. Thank you and enjoy.

Part One - Introduction

So while watching She-ra and the Princesses of Power, I was thinking a thought that many fanders had probably thought before (unless they are normal) which is ‘what characters are most like what side?’. It is one of my favourite things to do, assign the characters of whatever show I am watching to one of the sides or fusions of the sides. It is kind of like sorting characters into Hogwarts Houses!

So I decided on the obvious ones, Scorpia being most like a version of Patton (she is so friendly and kind and has lots of love), Entrapta potentially being Logan (being entirely motivated by knowledge), but when it came to Roman I had an interesting take.

See, the most obvious choice for Roman was Adora. She had the classic hero’s story, gifted with incredible power, having to save the world and wanting to be for her friends, and having the mistakes of someone who had her power before her to amend etc. And that seems like a classic Roman thing, being Thomas’ hero (yes I went there) and a prince. But there was another character who was almost too perfect of a fit. Catra. Let me break it down...

Part Two - The Comparison

- All her life Catra has been told she is not good enough by Shadow Weaver, so much so that she does everything in her power to prove herself worthy, no matter the cost. Roman has the same mindset, although he has never been told he wasn’t good enough directly he obviously believes it and it is not out of character for him to do whatever it takes to feel worthy and become good enough.

- Everyone Catra loves, or even didn’t love, leaves her. It started with Adora, who couldn’t stay with the Horde when she found out what they were doing and joined Glimmer and Bow. Catra takes this to heart, believing that Adora left her because she didn’t care about her, making her more insecure. A comparison would be Patton accepting Janus, which Roman would take as him choosing Janus over Roman and that Roman wasn’t good enough, making him more insecure.

- When Catra is feeling insecure she lashes out, ironically causing others to leave her, which just makes her more insecure. Guess who else does this? Roman!! When he feels insecure he tends to lash out (take the making fun of Janus’ name as an example)

- Catra will do whatever it takes to prove herself, no matter the cost, to make herself worthy in the eyes of Hordak and prove everyone who doubted or hurt her wrong. Roman does a similar thing, choosing the wedding over the callback to please Patton, being nice to Janus to make up for his mistakes with Virgil, then being against Janus to once again be seen as good in the eyes of Patton and Thomas. They both crave validation and base their self worth in how someone they look up to or in a place of power perceives them.

- They both mask their insecurities by acting a certain way. With Catra, it is by being nasty and mean, lashing out at people and intimidating them. She is a pretty good actor (take when she is talking to Hordak in s4 ep 11, she looks perfectly fine and in control but the moment the call ends she bursts into tears). With Roman it is by being overly dramatic, hiding everything with his acting as much as he could and playing every off as a joke.

- Everything builds up until they finally snap. With Catra, it had started with Adora leaving and ended with Scorpia leaving, everyone slowly leaving her behind, she started to become angrier and angrier, she craved more and more power, and she pushed herself to the absolute max and then she finally snapped. It was a gradual buildup of all of her insecurities, everything everyone had told her, and everyone she had ever cared about leaving her, and then at the end of s4 she finally fully snapped. You could see the tear in the rope become thinner and thinner. With Roman, it started to get real at around about CLBG, and gradually built up, with some particularly heartbreaking moments during LNTAO, CTM, SVS and POF, and you could see it was very gradual, until Roman finally snapped at the end of POF (I am not entirely sure if this is the peak of his arc or if there is something worse to come but this is the start of the peak at least). With both Catra and Roman you could see the build-up, you could see everytime they were hurting and you knew why, and you could see what was coming. But they sort of kept it up inside them and hid behind a mask until they couldn’t anymore.

I think Catra and Roman are scarily similar, the main difference being the exact circumstances (duh) and the fact that Roman is a light side and Catra is on the evil side. Which is an excellent segway to my next section of called...

Part Three - Dark Side Roman!!

So, I don’t actually think that Roman will become a dark side per se, given that the definition of a dark side in the Sanders Sides Universe is a side which Thomas either doesn’t know about or hasn’t accepted. So, no, I don’t think Roman will become a dark side. However, I do think there is a possibility for a darker Roman, a more villain Roman if you will. And if that happens I think that Roman will act exactly like Catra (minus the cat noises of course). If he becomes dark, I reckon he will drive everyone who stood beside him at first away by lashing out because of his insecurities, he has already finally snapped and he would do whatever it takes, no matter the cost, to prove himself worthy to Thomas and probably Patton too. It is entirely in Roman’s character to act like this, and I think that Catra is a sort of reflection of the traits that they share in a more villain/darker light. After all, Catra said in the Crimson Watse ‘threats only work on someone who has something to lose’. Catra had nothing to lose, and after POF, neither does Roman.

In Conclusion

Roman and Catra are scarily similar in terms of their personality and their arcs and their situations in a broader sense. I think that if a villain/darker Roman were to happen he would act exactly like Catra and that Catra is a reflection of their shared traits turned dark. Despite them being two different characters, they are the most similar out of any Shera/Sanders Sides comparison and it sheds a new light (for me at least) on how Roman’s character arc could play out and what a villain Roman could look like.

But that is just my opinion and a theory. Feel free to tell me your thoughts!!

Also tagging @moxy--sanders101 because she expressed interest (hope you don’t mind ☺️)

#cat.txt #roman my beloved #catra #sanders sides #spop #long post #catra vs roman #villain roman

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booasaur · 4 years

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I loved warrior nun! I went into it w no expectations other than my brother telling me to watch it and it ended up being so good! I looooove Beatrice and was so happy to see she’s gay (I’m assuming based on her heartbreaking reaction to the word lesbian that she’s specifically a lesbian). Ava honestly annoyed me a lot of the time but I loved all the others, esp Mary! And Ava/B seemed like a potential thing in that hug for me too and then post cinderblocks was !!!! Even tho I think it’ll (1/2)

End up as a one-sides crush given her earlier fixation on JC I could also see them as a slow burn friendship turned more. I doubt the show will go there but you never know lol. The show was good beyond any shipping tho which is actually rare for me nowadays, I really hope they get a second season! (2/2)

It was good! I was shocked, tbh. It was good in this very specific way that I appreciated, partly because recently, in addition to the shows I watch on the regular, I’ve been trying some f/f books, mostly genre, and the variation in quality of the pacing and especially dialogue can be so noticeable. I need dialogue to be four things: natural, distinct between different characters, advancing character, and advancing plot and honestly, this should be the bare minimum, but it’s really not. So I just super appreciated it in this show that I absolutely didn’t expect it from, first seasons and super cheesy sff plots usually mean tons of worldbuilding exposition and attempts to establish and nail down characters, but this did so well with that, just jumping in and passing info as needed. And the actors all committed to their admittedly absurd characters and totally embodied them. I think honestly I just had such low expectations that this exceeding them so well made for an even bigger positive gap in the experience.

Yes, I LOVED Beatrice, god, what a character! From the start. So compassionate while being such a competent leader, that is my absolute favorite character combo. It’s like, you’re a good judge of people, you see them for what they are, and you still think well of them. Love that. And the little hints about her gayness, which I do agree with you, I think she is a lesbian, but how it was revealed! This goes back to what I was praising above, how the show chose to tell this story, what and how it revealed, who it focused on when it did it. Like, you know from Camila telling her about that passage while smiling to herself, that she knows about Bea’s past and if she does, you can speculate that it’s probably a whole open secret, and from Camila’s own reaction, not everyone judges her for it as harshly as Bea herself seems to. How much was conveyed in just that little! I loved her relationship with Camila, tbh! I almost wonder if that’s where they might go, but maybe not. I’m kind of afraid they’ll kill off Camila if/when s2 picks up because you can’t have this high stakes battle and not kill someone off, right? Maybe Mother Superion (who had the HOTTEST voice, btw).

Ava...Ava, Ava, Ava. I can totally see how she rubs people the wrong way but I found her endearing. She’s a total dumbass, for sure, but she knows it, they all do, lol. She’s trying! Mary was greaaat. The way she’s gonna protect Ava because of Shannon...everyone’s so multilayered. Lilith being raised for this and being passed over again and again, like, I love them all.

The Ava/Bea (Beava? oh wait, lmao, probably not) thing is...it’s definitely canon one-sided, yeah, I guess we’ll have to wait to see how they go with them? The way they introduced JC and even his whole crew, I thought he’d stay relevant the whole time, but he disappeared halfway through and tbh, I don’t know what he could offer next season, except a place to lie low, since Jillian’s now distracted? But they have other contacts already and if they bring him back, it’ll have to be for more than that. He better not get his own powers or something.

Man, though, I would so love if they went with Ava/Bea, not just for the main character wlw part or it being super central f/f, but they’re legit great as friends and teammates, Bea gets through to Ava in a way nobody else does (though Mary comes close--who’d have thought, being nice works) and Ava helps Bea let loose a little without compromising her leadership. I actually super loved that even after the ep 8 reveals, Bea didn’t lose what made her Bea, she didn’t start to moon over Ava and drop the part of her that’s a great leader. A lot of media has so much trouble writing character dynamics after that turn, they’ll soften and neuter them far beyond they should, they become different characters, but Bea was exactly who she always was. I also hope they get a second season to like, at least finish off this story, but also I wouldn’t mind seeing more of the f/f. :P

#replies #femslash related stuff #sent on 20200704 #Anonymous #warrior nun spoilers #warrior nun #avatrice

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nellie-elizabeth · 3 years

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Doctor Who: Revolution of the Daleks (2021 New Years Special)

I honestly really loved that! Like, a lot!

Cons:

It wasn't perfect, however. Of course. A few little nitpicky things, and one or two bigger complaints:

So, the bad guy was a little too one-note evil capitalist/politician. Some of his lines made me roll my eyes, like "this is a PR nightmare" being his reaction when he learned that the Daleks were eating liquified humans. The irony of him suddenly being hailed as a hero worked okay, but he was maybe just a touch too cartoonish for my personal preference, in an episode that mostly managed to feel really grounded.

Sometimes the Dalek stories will touch on this "race purity" thing, and the Doctor will talk about how they are beings of hate, and it really feels like we're doing a Nazi allegory, but they don't quite... go somewhere with it? Like, we've got the Prime Minster character talking about protecting borders and increasing security, and then the Daleks who are trying to stamp out "impurities," right? And there's something there, it's not exactly the most subtle of story craft, I guess I just wish it felt more intentional. The Daleks have metaphorical resonance here, and I'm not sure it was totally utilized.

My biggest complaint is one that could have been fixed with an added line or two of dialogue. See, the Doctor drops her "fam" off, then immediately gets imprisoned and remains trapped for literal years, from her perspective. Jack shows up and saves her, and when they return back to Earth, ten months have passed for Graham, Ryan, and Yaz. And the fam, especially Yaz and Ryan, are pissed. They're livid with her for abandoning them, and it really made them think about their place in life, if they want to stay with the Doctor or not. That's all well and good, but there's not really a confrontation of the fact that the Doctor didn't abandon them because she was off on a lark... she was imprisoned. Alone, cut off, for years. I was really flummoxed by the lack of sympathy extended by the others. I know it's her "fault" or maybe the TARDIS' "fault" that she got back ten months later, but what about the years that she spent without them? In my opinion, there was a lack of balance in dealing with that aspect of things.

Pros:

So... if Yaz is not supposed to be in love with the Doctor, someone forgot to tell the actors. And writers. Because WOW. I'm kind of obsessed with the way Yaz was written here. When the Doctor is gone, both Graham and Ryan try and get on with their lives. But Yaz remains firmly focused on finding the Doctor. Of all three companions, Yaz is the one who gets a special moment with Jack, where they basically commiserate over what it's like to be in love with the Doctor and know you won't get to stay with her forever. And then Yaz decides to stay, while the other two leave the TARDIS. There is just so much material here, so much love and desperation from Yaz. There were ways to make this a lot more no-homo, and they didn't take it. For example, during the Jack and Yaz conversation, Jack starts off talking about all the amazing things he got to see with the Doctor, and how losing that was so hard. But Yaz doesn't frame it around her experiences in general, she frames it around the Doctor as a person - wishing she'd never met her so she wouldn't have to suffer knowing what she'd be losing. It's GAY, I tell you. GAY!

Just look at Yaz's arc in this episode. She's missing the Doctor, she's conflicted about staying with her because of the heartbreak awaiting her at the end, but she chooses, ultimately, to stay by her side. Honestly, Yaz is the first companion since... well... Rose, maybe, whose character arc is best served by staying with the Doctor forever. Because she loves her. Romantically. Other companions, notably Martha, Amy, Rory, and Bill, all had other shit going on, other things they had to learn through their adventures. A life to grow into. Yaz? Yaz's place is by the Doctor's side, and I for one am thrilled to see where they're going with this. Come on, BBC. Don't be cowards. Make it gay.

Having Jack back in this special was such a treat. He's an undeniably fun and hilarious character, but Barrowman grounds the performance and gives Jack some real weight. I kind of love the way Jack and this version of the Doctor interact, with this depth of history but also a certain frostiness. We must remember that the Doctor knows what happens to Jack, exactly how long he'll live and how his end will come, and this version of the Doctor, more than any of the other modern versions, has a bit of a wall up when it comes to revealing her inner self to the people around her. But they still love each other, and you can see that love shining through the performance. At first, I was kind of miffed that Jack basically made his exit offscreen, just a voiceover saying he was staying on Earth, a very casual goodbye... but then actually I ended up loving that choice. It's like the Doctor and Jack are two people who were once very close, and will always have that bond, but now they're kind of like time traveling coworkers, just flitting in and out of each others' orbits. The way Jack leaves, there's no reason why he might not come back another time. It's refreshing and fun.

And Jack gave himself a bit of a mentor role in this episode, coaching the others (especially Yaz) on what it is to be the Doctor's companions, on what it might mean. I loved the moment when the Doctor came up with a plan to defeat the Daleks, and while the others were all confused, Jack got exactly what she was doing and tried to talk her out of it right away. Then, when the ship needed to be destroyed, the Doctor assigned the task to Jack, knowing that he'd be happy to blow it up. That shared history really shined through for me!

And now let's talk about Ryan and Graham leaving the TARDIS to stay on earth. Earlier, I was talking about companions and how for the most part, the characters have a growth arc over their time with the Doctor. For Ryan and Graham, it was about healing their relationship, as they grieved for their shared loss. And they did that. They have purpose now, as we see them continuing their life and fighting to protect Earth in the Doctor's absence. I love the idea of having more companions around for the Doctor to interact with. This has never been an ensemble show (not since it rebooted anyway), and the gimmick works best by having the Doctor and one or a small number of companions along for the ride in the TARDIS. But imagine Ryan or Graham giving the Doctor a call someday, whether it be in this regeneration or the next, because they need help with a problem back on Earth. Or maybe the Doctor calls them up the next time she's in the neighborhood! It warms my heart to think about it!

I haven't talked much about the Daleks or, you know, the actual plot of this special, and that's because frankly I'm not sure that was where its strengths lie. And that's okay! I will say I liked that the focus remained on the characters and their relationships, but we also had some commentary about the growing prevalence of the police state in first-world western countries. And capitalism is always an easy motivator for a villain, and that was executed more or less well, barring the complaints I made above. It was a serviceable story that created a proper threat, while really only being there to serve as a backdrop for the human drama.

So that's it! I've seen some mixed responses to this one floating around, but I for one quite enjoyed myself, and I'm excited to meet this new companion coming in. As long as they don't try and make him a love interest for Yaz or the Doctor. These ladies are spoken for.

8/10

#review #doctor who #doctor who review #dw

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yeocult · 4 years

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ateez film diary analysis

ok i am currently typing with tears in my eyes but that’s cool!!!! gonna talk about ateez diary film for a moment. btw if you’re here for theories, this might not be for you, my brain is not capable of that critical thinking lmao. although, i will be rambling/analyzing the cinematography and overall admiring the film!! under the cut because this happened to be 1.5k words oops.

man, first of all, 16 minutes?? thank you for the food kq!! i think their concept is super cool. it’s unpredictable, refreshing, and just gives me a lot of high hopes for this comeback. ateez never disappoints, they come back each time stronger and better.

“this is the story where their dimensions are split into eight pieces again.” that kinds hurt me. throughout the film we see clips of them being happy and joyful with each other, but we also see scenes where they’re all alone. they didn’t get separated by losing contacts or whatever, literally dimensions.

phew okay, when the man with the black fedora approaching hongjoong like that was soooo dskjdj ugh i love it when they have a bright light in the back, capturing the silhouette perfectly. sorry i’m such a sucker for those types of shoots!! now hongjoong’s dream. “the world inside a television cannot be reached. the world they live in and the world that i live in is blocked.” yea.. they’re separated from dimensions. isn’t that so heartbreaking?? separated by time and space.

um this might be a huge stretch, plus i’m horrible at science. i’ve read a lot of articles on where, ‘if time stopped would gravity still apply?’ and i thought of this because of the items floating up around hongjoong. without time, gravity, acceleration, speed and force are simply meaningless, so i guess that’s why it’s floating? as if we’re going back in time. there’s a lot of consequences and weird things on going back in time/time travelling (most famously the ‘bootstrap paradox’) because time is not an object and cannot ‘go’ anywhere at all, not forward, not backward, nor can it stop. so i expected some not so happy events to occur.

anyways moving on to seonghwa’s memory. i loved this. “i thought i lacked in many areas and have much to learn.” then we see a bunch of to-do lists and i guess they’re kinda like goals to accomplish or things he wants to learn. the somewhat long shot of him sitting on this table and the camera moving away from him gave me a sense of isolation (i also don’t know why yeo in the smn box is on the tv but it could mean he’s trapped). we also see him walking straight, kinda like following a straightforward path with a lot of control, hence the to-do lists. then he hits stops. now the girl is the total opposite of seonghwa. she’s dancing, moving, and overall carefree i would say. everything seonghwa is lacking. she’s freedom. i don’t have much to say about this scene but i really like how when he was walking one step at a time, it was completely dark. but as soon as it hits stops and sees her, there were lights.

now my favourite, wooyoung’s choice. that transition to seonghwa’s little emo time to wooyoung’s hyped underground music and dancing was the serotonin boost i needed. let’s talk about his ponytail because it made me a whole simp for him. plus he’s so fucking cool?? if i become a wooyoung biased soon, you know why. he talks about stage fright and the scene where people were looking down at the camera was perfect, low camera shots show dominance or superiority. when you have stage fright, you’re worried and insecure about your abilities (at least that’s how i feel) and with people look down at you is almost like they’re judging and aren’t expecting much from you. ateez brings him courage and reassurance, they give him strength. the last scene with the rain and the flickering light so chilling. its almost like the rain washed away his everything.

yeosang’s time giving me slight dark academia vibes and i’m here for it!!! also bird metaphors?? yes please! “limited freedom. like a bird in a cage.” we see yeosang in a room surrounded by other musicians but he isn’t playing his instrument. almost like he doesn’t wanna be there or has no real passion for this field. hence him talking about ‘expanding his dreams’. we get a close shot at his face looking forward to the right, i feel as if he’s daydreaming or reaching out. taking back to say my name, we have yeosang trapped inside that box, almost like the birds with limited freedom. he drops his violin and suddenly the birds (they symbolize peace, transformation, freedom and power) are free, giving us a scene with his friends. he’s free.

san’s resolution might just be my favourite in terms of cinematography. can we just talk about the long amount of time san has the stay put for the timelapse to work?? the scene wins my heart. now we see the classroom in a mess, meaning school was never enjoyable to san. always moving and no friends. the way he’s moving seems like there’s not much he can do in his life. the escalator scenes kinda look like the one in wonderland. time is always moving, the escalator moving, and san runs back up despite it moving in the opposite direction. im not sure where i was going with this but i thought i was kinda cool, how he’s running back up to be with his friends.

next, we have yunho and his brother. in a matter of seconds, all the light in the studio flicker and turns off. this is quite similar to the flicker lights in wooyoung’s last scene. there’s a pattern here with flickering lights and how it means lost and loneliness. we don’t know what 5:07 mean, maybe its completely relevant but knowing kq and their team, almost everything seems intentional. also i saw on twt (not my analysis) but seonghwa’s to-do list includes a task of learning how to drive, then we get yunho getting hit by a car. not sure where i got from this but i thought i would include it.

actor jongho!!!! he’s so good i love him. ok so we get that basketball was his dreams but due to his broken leg, it seems impossible for him to pursue that dream. we him sitting at a distance, admiring the game and the people who are able to play. but when he’s in the court, he’s all alone (might just be because he can’t go in court when other people are playing but just let me be deep for a second oki). the burning basketball means he cannot play again. then the fight scene between him and mingi. i want to talk about the camera work for a second. it’s unstable, harsh and a little unfocused (because it’s handheld) and it makes it seem like another member’s pov, pushing the realism on us. hmm this might be kinda dumb but the loud bang when mingi got pushed was a little unexpected hence every scene with the boys was all very calm and had music in the back, no sounds. idk just a noticed. ohmygod another silhouette scene with beautiful lighting in the back!!!! the camera is moving away from him, moving away shows weakness. i loveee this so much along with the smoke. his dreams are burning up, literally.

last we have mingi’s diary. “earphones in my ears, the world is mine for now.” again, similar to seonghwa in the dark walking, mingi is isolating himself from the world. he’s using music to escape from reality. mingi looks trapped by the way its shot, cutting off his forehead and lips only showcasing his eyes and nose. this could be his facial features are more important than anything else right now. the camera angle is below mingi, again with the dominance and superiority… because he literally kicked someone. but still the same camera angle except this time mingi is looking up at the sky or forward, not looking down. with that, mingi no longer looks intimidating, he seems slightly vulnerable. and i think that’s really powerful how quickly he transitions despite the same angle. so we know mingi uses music as an escape, “i would rather be alone than encounter the world.” then we see yeosang (by his flannel) taking off his earphones. bringing him back to reality with the boys, and everything seems a lot more peaceful. its kinda like, without his friends, he would rather be isolated. now i want to point how the loud bang from jongho’s shot. it’s literally the same shot but the noise isn’t there indicating that mingi has earphones in (i think even when they’re not literally in, he still shuts out noise), shutting off the noise. i think the little details were so well done. we also get a match cut of mingi blinking, back to the darkness. i think it shows how quickly things can be taken away from you.

MAN THE SCENE WHERE THEY ALL GATHER TOWARDS HONGJOONG JAKJDSJKSDJKSD I CANNOT BREATHE IT GAVE ME SO MUCH CHILLS MYGODDOO !!!!!! like that scene in say my name. gotta love the build up of the song then it drops when the members all show up UGH I LOVED THAT SOO MUCH!! “the memories of short happiness. and dreams broken into pieces” brb gonna cry. the hourglass is finished,, what does this mean? ;o also i cant help but to notice the lighting on how one side is dark and the other has light. this could just be for aesthetics but idkkkk just another notice.

hehe sorry this made no sense,,, anyways that’s all i have to say, i’m so excited for their comeback <33

#h.txt #pHEW #haha dont clown me i know nothing about film #also send me your thought?#i would love to talk about cinematography!!#ateez #might add on to this later!!#moon talks

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popcornbutterflymedia · 3 years

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it’s a little before seven in the evening as i am attempting to begin writing this post on the day a former president has died. in other words, i am winging it and praying it comes out half decent. i have been winging all my the posts for this show, but writing this post about this particular episode at the tail end of the last week is interesting, to say the least.

upon first viewing on iwanttfc, i had already tweeted “consider this the soul of the show.” at this point we’re not even halfway to the entire series. that declaration carries such weight, but this episode did prove to be the soul of the series. this is also the first episode i’ve had a visceral reaction to, beyond the understandable kilig. i was lightheaded, stumped, and on the verge of tears after the first episode viewing, that’s probably why this is taking awhile to put out.

this also feels like an episodic answer to a lot of questions.

max has entered the lion’s den, lost, but with her defenses up. deib was less than prepared to fight back, considering the circumstances, but he was quick to gather his wits about him, pinning max where he is at an advantage. even now, as i am writing it, i feel it - it’s a notch above giddiness, it’s an awareness, it’s pushing the envelope in a way that’s right for their age, but still surprising, and refreshing. it’s the naughtiness of the sly smiles, the role reversal, and the trading of banter, all of them collectively are building blocks to max and deib’s dynamic.

the banter graduates to actual conversation, that, for people who are considered arch rivals, is surprisingly decent, and seemingly cordial. both max and deib give as good as they get, much like a tennis rally where either one refuses to be on the losing end. this amuses to no end, and ups the kilig factor in such an intelligent and substantial way. this is how you know, this part of the series is their story. more on this later.

outside of the boy’s room, the banter becomes a challenge, a daring as represented by a pool table, and the number of games that such table hosts. these pool games between benison’s star player and mindoro’s top billiard player, and pool center fixture, these games are metaphors, with the stakes higher each game, for their rivalry, and their curiosity about each other. more so his curiosity about this slip of a girl who he finds difficult to win against. i daresay, at some point he gave up trying to win, and just gave in seeing her in a different light. deib’s eyes give him away, and as for donny’s eyes, finally doing the work, this is it, and it’s a sight to see, a growth to enjoy.

it’s a given that belle makes donny’s job easier for him. four episodes in, and i am still in awe at belle’s ability to transform. it’s still surprising, how she willingly gets lost in character. i am watching max, but she doesn’t make me forget that i am watching belle. it’s a weird thing i have watching actors in character - i am aware i am watching both the character and the actor wholly and simultaneously, and belle is one of the few who makes me do that with ease.

deib’s mother announces her presence, interrupts the pool tournament shaping up between taguro and sensui.

in front of his mother, deib the star bear, the alpha disappears. he signals for max to leave, and just when she was about to, max is invited to join them for dinner. it is insisted that she join her for dinner. he warns his friend: 'don't say anything that will get us into trouble' prompting said friend, max to wonder, what could she ever say that will put them both in trouble?

at the dinner table, the silence weighs heavy between mother and son. a silence foreign to the lone guest, a silence she attempts to diffuse, by talking about anything other than subjects, as touchy as family, and the like. then again, between this mother and son, the line between touchy and permissible topics of conversation are blurred and fragile.

food! food is a free for all, food is a benign subject. the food's delicious, is it her own recipe? max is genuinely curious ma'am. the woman across the table laughs off such a formal honorific. call her auntie, she says. 'tita' is more like it. 'tita' it is, max decides. not stopping there, max asks if she'd gone to one of deib's games to see his lay ups and three pointers. she regaled him with embellished stories of his reputation, of being an all around star student and an instant friend. this, much to the mother's relief - her son is apparently surrounded by good people. max was able to do all this, when all deib asked of her was to not get both of them, into trouble. just like that, the girl single handedly broke the tension and dispelled the air of formality, in a way no one else has. if that isn't enough of a surprise for deib, max held the door open for him, and granteded him access to his own mother's heart, and let hope spring in his own.

after dinner, we find max and deib in his room, steeped in the assigned work. it's an easy silence between them, proof that from that dinner encounter, something new and beautiful and unnamed grew between them. he pays her his due, and thanks her for not damaging his reputation more in front of his own mother. so he knows how to say thank you, after all, she's surprised...in jest. he allows it. and so insues an exchange of histories, and fears and lessons. she reads him so perfectly, he's supposed to be scared, or condemn her, or banish her from this earth, or whatever it is the deib lhor enrile does to those who get a bit too close for comfort. he, instead allows it, giving her unprecedented access to his friends, his brother, his heart. and his heartbreaks. he dares to get closer himself, in the most physical sense so the curiosity planted at the pool table grew exponentially. that is until she breaks the spell. there is resistance in letting him in, which he knows to hold against her. he wins, and she relents. we learn of a ghost of a past love, a young love. a better player than deib is.

just a note though: for a past love who ghosted her, max boasts of rj being the better basketball player still. this could be true, based on who I am guessing rj is, but consider this: could she be clinging onto the untarnished memory she has of this first love, disregarding the pain she was caused, because straying away from that memory will allow her the space to fall, and that's what she promised herself she would never do? if that's the case, max is just as complex as deib is, maybe even more so.

after knowing her story, he did promise to go up against this ghost of a lover, in a one on one game of basketball and win it for her. someone is making her promises now. that's unsettling.

meanwhile, the barb is winding down as alpha two plus lorde strolls in. they keep it open for the boys who are in for a later night shot of caffeine, sweets, a shot at love perhaps?

art and sweets and flirtatious, funny quips are choice ammunition in this game of love, or something like it. naih's confidence is legendary. she gets away with her boldness because of criza's charm. joao, you know, that boy always makes it work.

tob and michiko are easy, because rhys and kaori make it easy. i understand the visual. I get the chemistry. I swear I get the hype. I have been waiting for this. you all know that. they've only cemented their place in the industry as new partnership, and there are hardly any words for it, a chemistry this strong. theirs is an unspoken connection and sincerity that cannot be taught. they are all that.

it is clear, though, that this is deib and max's story. see, I have been hyping myself up for thst tochiko moment, probably from the time when we still had very little news in the junket about donny and belle. and they did deliver, they did not disappoint. max and deib's chemistry surprisingly captured my heart from the get go, though, especially in this episode (as they should, this is, again, their story anyway). if I was a teenager, I would be fawning over tochiko's eye to eye silent conversation and up to now, I still do to some extent. I'm just older now. give me substantial kilig more than anything any day. give me kilig in context. kilig that opens up the heart. kilig with emotional intimacy.

max and deib in the fourth episode is kilig (just as tob and michiko are), but I can't stress enough, just how much and why. from the entire conversation from the banter to the interaction with the mom to the entire encounter in the room, they aren't trying to make us kilig. it isn't exactly sweet, but you'll reach a point where just the mere act of people wanting to have a conversation with you is life changing, when someone cares enough not to put you in more trouble than you expect, matters so much more. it shows you your worth. and that to me is the sweetest most loving thing ever. that is, even before both of them acknowledge that love between them.

a breakthrough has been reached. walls have been shattered.

the day of their school presentation, the event is met with an air of uncertainty, not for the two's lack of skill, but because two people from separate ends of the social spectrum are to work together, which up to that point is unprecedented.

the presentation started out shaky even for max and deib themselves, but once they got drafted, they had the audience, most of them, at least in the palm of their hands.

'we are all bullies, yet we are also victims. the cycle never ends...because we are all trying to survive this cruel world, trying to succeed, trying to grow. trying to discover who we really are. trying to accept who we really are. trying to be accepted for who we really are...'

this was followed by definitive apologies from both deib, for bullying, and max, for judging, and not necessarily helping to make things better. this prompted the entire community to mingle, and make their own apologies.

a few things about this whole moment:

there is such power in calling things as they are, calling things by their name. 'bully' and 'victim' are such weighted words and there is such a relief in taking responsibility for your disgressions and through that responsibility allowing your victim to embraced their pain guiltlessly.

there is also such power and humility, that while one did not do anything explicit, to stop the cycle, they did not do anything to make things better, easier. there is humility in realising that even as a victim your own pain, might have caused more pain to others.

apologies matter. the word 'sorry' matters. and it matters across the board. while metaphorical apologies are in some ways acceptable, and poetic, sometimes, the simpler, the better. a sincere 'sorry' should suffice. no one is ever too old to apologize.

now, even the sincerest words have parameters that are dictated by how many listen, and how many don't. and that's what we cannot control. there is power in recognizing who you are in the community, and that, especially when you are in a place of influence, you have the power to create change. the power to stop the cycle. there is peace in knowing we've done all that we could to make things better, just like deib had his own moment of reckoning.

as for max, the moment she stepped into that school, she was meant to be a trailblazer, and even at this point, she had been nothing but an agent of change.

I am curious now, how she is changed by the newness of her surroundings and the possibility of a budding love?

everything is well and dandy for everyone else, max and deib even had that little moment by the tables, again with the simple but powerful chemistry. everyone is changing (this is a shoutout to melizza again. every time the camera pans to her, especially when max was speaking at the auditorium, you could sense an internal transformation. she knows the assignment well, huh? )...everyone else, but aimee. I feel sorry for her. it makes me want to know more of her story. what makes her cling to being mean? why the volatility? more than anger, there's curiosity. I feel sorry for her. there's more to be told. breakthroughs open the narrative up for more, newer stories.

this was a fast one to write, but I held off until these last few moments, because it's incredibly triggering and just as healing. more than the kilig I understand and we all enjoy, the real message is the importance of communication, telling people how you really feel. don't let them assume and don't assume they know. it's also important to call things as they are, even if it's ugly, even as it hurts. some days, there is no replacement for a 'sorry,' a genuine apology.

be gentle. be kind. listen. everyone, after all, is a story.

#tv #tv: he's into her

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bepoets · 3 years

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Review for Trish’s Dream Fic

Trish ( @couragedontdesertme ) said she’d write an epilogue of the elsarik dream Fic if I made a Formal Review of the elsarik dream fic. So here we are.

Please note review should be taken VERY LIGHTLY this is more or less me re-reading the Fic and loudly yelling about things with too many exclamation points. Enjoy Trish.

Ch1

First of all imagine my fucking surprise I didn’t even know you had gotten work done on the dream fic???? Here I was thinking the link you sent me was the next chapter of city of ice and then I click on it and it saYS DREAM FIC???? E X C U S E M E oh my goodness

The first section is just so entirely domestic and beautiful and you can tell how lived in and content they are in their life as roommates. ALARIK (listen my phone autocorrects ALARIK to be in all caps and I’m too lazy to fix it so y’all are gonna have to deal with reading ALARIK’s name as if I’m yelling it every time I type it) anyway ALARIK just bringing her the chocolate croissants she loves so dearly and Elsa curling up with a book and him fretting and worrying over her being there alone all day and later... it’s just SO DOMESTIC. it’s such a small short moment but it’s so domestic and a perfect opposite of the PAIN THAT HAPPENS AFTER!!! And we al know I LOVE READING PAIN

The fact that ALARIK was only home late because he was doing tutoring to earn more money to by Elsa A PRESENT????? Shut up no one speak to me that’s true love but also PAINFUL the guilt he must feel oh my god

Elsa...stops struggling... because she doesn’t want ,,,, ALARIK ,,,, to get hurt. Because she cares for his safety more than her own because he has protected her and he is her friend and she loves him I am going to SCREAM

The fact that you use the phrase ~marching her out of the warmth of the room~ when she just used her magic to like cover the walls in frost makes my Heart burst cause idk if it was intentional or not but I just love the thought that this room has become Home to her it’s become safe and beautiful and lovely and WARM because it is full of love and friendship and companionship rather than the cold loneliness of say her ice palace of her locked room as a child. I like to think Elsa could have covered the room entirely in ice and snow and frost and it would still feel warm to her because of the love that’s developed there thank you for coming to my tedtalk

Ugh fuck hans

I have literally no words other than fuck hans for any section with hans in it I DONT even want to RECOGNIZE THAT HE EXISTS !!! Making Elsa feel like she’s nothing I am going to punch him in the eye

~ALARIK weeps over smushed chocolate croissant. End scene~

I know that it’s such a heartbreaking sad ending for that first chapter but also I really can’t stop laughing about him crying over a stepped on croissant since I know that your like planning note for that last scene was literally just some variant of ALARIK cried over a smushed croissant and that’s just such a funny IMAGE TO ME EVEN THOUGH ITS SAD

I just like to imagine ALARIK cradling the chocolate croissant in his arms like a bébé as he sobs

Ch2

I’m fucking S A D

ALARIK having like NO MONEY and just thinking about that the money he has was going to go to a gift for Elsa and the guard LAUGHING AT HIM LIKE THATS IT THATS ALL YOU HAVE?? Like shut UP HES TRYING TO SAVE HIS BELOVED

P e t t y c h a n g e HE IS TRYING MR GUARD I WILL HAVE YOU KNOW HE WORKED EXTRA TO GET THAT MONEY

ALARIK is so fucking DEVOTED I’m going to run through a goddamn wall I cannot cope. Willing to sell the clothes off his back have you ever seen an idiot more iN LOVE

ALARIK just going willingly cause he has no fight left in him and he just wants to see Elsa even if it means he gets imprisoned too oh my GOD

THE SCENE ITS THE SCENE!!!!!!!!!

STRAIGHT FROM TRISH’S SUBCONSCIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WHAT STARTED IT ALL!!!!!!!!!!

ALARIK wanting to hold her hands when her hands are what are chained up and seen as dangerous and what ~make her a witch~ the absolute love and power that holds.

LET ALARIK AND ELSA HOLD HANDS

“I promised to keep you safe” the pain I feel oh mY GOD

“They’ll KILL you” they’re really out here trying to protect each other at all costs oh my god nothing matters more to the other than keeping the other safe and for that I want to cry and love them and also I want to ram their heads into the wall because wHY WONT THEY JUST PROTECT ESCH OTHER TOGETHER

The PARALLEL OH MY FUCKING GOD

the P A R A L L E L of ALARIK stilling and no longer struggling when the guards threaten Elsa’s death in the same way that Elsa stilled and stopped struggling when they threatened ALARIK’s death oh my god that broke me right there

U g h hans fuck that guy

A N N A !!!!!!!!

When I first read this,,, I DONT know why??? But for some reason??? I didn’t think Anna would be in it???? Which like thinking back on that it makes no sense of COURSE Anna would be in the FIC why would I ever think otherwise. But anyway I was so surprised when she showed up I literally gasped and went ANNA??? Out loud because I was so shocked

ALFAFA GERANIUM

ALARIK really is just so bad under pressure who thought this was a good idea

AG FOR SHORT wink wink nudge nudge cough cough

I’ll be thinking about ALARIK shouting alfafa geranium on my death bed let us never forget

“No harm, no foul” is literally the most fucking Anna line I’ve ever heard. She absolutely would say that to someone who was being question for a crime she’d be like “it’s not biggy”

Why is it that when hans says “BUT ANNA!!!” I hear it like he’s wining like a petulant child I read it like “bUT annNNAAAAA” ugh I hate him

“Don’t scream” *ALARIK’s inner monologue* “this ,, is the story of how I died”

ILL HELP YOU HELP HER ESCAPE!!!!! HELL YEA YOU WILL ANNA HELL YEA YOU WILL

Ch3

My dumbass really went “why are none of the children named neta” before remembering that is the child of Anna and Kristoff and these...are the children of Anna ,,, and .... ugh please don’t make me say his name

I would die for these kids though I love them and I want to protect them at all costs

Johannes at 5 (and a half!!!!) being a fine soldier GOOD FOR HIM

Isak owns my entire heart from the moment he started fake crying for his mother what a star performer a true Actor he’s too good

Arendellian Royal Guards, are they guards? Or are they simply baby sitters? The world may never know

JOAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! One of the babies being named JOAN!!! Hang in there Joan!!!!!!!!! That made me cry oh my god J O A N

Bébé Isak lookout supreme with his big eyeballs and smile and goofy lil salute I love him

The fact that Elsa says she felt stupid for being lured into a false sense of security means she felt secure and safe for literally the first time since she was a child when she was with ALARIK and I cannot properly articulate how much that made me cry I love that so much that has to mean sO MUCH TO HER oh my god

“You have to get out!! Do the magic!!” NO ONE SPEAK TO ME ABOUT ANYTHING EXCEPT THIS LINE FOR THE NEXT SEVERAL MONTHS I LITERALLY WEPT

the use of DO THE MAGIC oh my god AND ELSAS HEART LIKE BREAKING BECAUSE SHE FEELS LIKE SHE CANT

DO ! THE ! MAGIC !

Brave little boy with his mother’s determination saying “be brave. That’s what mama said to tell you” oh my GOD THESE CHILDREN HAVE MY WHOLE HEART OH MY GOD

A rooster crow for the signal COUKD they be more obvious I love these kids they’re ridiculous they are truly the children of Anna

Elsa!!! Chose!! To be!!! Brave!!!

IF SHE TRIED TO SAY GOODBYE TO ELSA!!! SHE MAY NEVER LET GO!!!

SHE HAD NO WHERE TO GO!!! BUT SHE DOES BEVAUSE THERES ALARIK WAITING FOR HER BECAUSE GUESS WHAT

ALARIK IS HER HOME !!!!! HE IS HER HOME !!!! SHE CAN GO TO HIM!!!!

Queue another one of my shocked and delightfully surprised screams as I shouted KRISTOFF????? Because blonde dude driving a reindeer cart

Let’s get you somewhere safe I’m going to cry THEYRE finally together again and they can keep each other safe together as. They. Should.

They are cuddling and my heart is exploding oh my god ALARIK seems so surprised like you big dumb idiot you’re both in love with each other it’s a mutual thing get with the program

SLEEP ELSA! ITS GOING TO BE OKAY! AND FOR THE FIRST TIME IN PROBABLY FOREVER! IT WILL BE!

Ch4

*queue another gasp* there’s only one bed?????

Yea I saw it coming yea I was just as shocked even so yea I got very excited about it wHAT DID YOU EXPECT

They’re cUDDLING and he went to move away and she DOESNT WANT HIM TO they could’ve been sharing a bed THIS WHOLE TIME AND I JUST WANT TO SCREAM BECAUSE OBVIOUSLY

ALARIK laying all the credit on kristoff and the kids when he’s kind of the one that steamrolled the whole plan into happening because he’s the one who showed up ALARIK please give yourself more credit

“You came back” “of course I came back... I couldnt ...” “why?” And then ALARIK refusing to meet her eyes has me absolutely weeping this is the kind of shit I THRIVE ON this is truly a gift to us all everyone say thank you Trish for these three bits of dialogue I will be thinking about them for all my days

ELSA KISSED HIM!!!!!!!!!

Yeah I do lose my shit anytime Elsa is the one to make the first move you go girl you go

THE SPICE VENDOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bringing in all my favorites I am going to cry thank you Trish I love Darius

I SUPPOSE YOU TWO HAVE FINALLY GOTTEN MARRIED

listen I SCREAMED WHEN HE SAID THAT I SQUAWKED!!!! MARRIED!!!!!!

I had been observing you two and just assumed!!!!! You would assume right mr spice vendor sir if they WERENT so stupid for so long it’s okay we understand

WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE ??? And Elsa says MARRY US? And ALARIK is going to PASS THE FUCK OUT

He literally got to finally kiss the woman he’s in love with for the first time last night and now they’re getting married poor boy is going to get WHIPLASH from how fast things are progressing but it’s okay im sure he is happy

Elsa’s little vows of just needing each other and keeping each other safe and keeping company and not needing gold or silver ugh TRUE LOVE

And ALARIK hopelessly devoted to her being like I PROMISE

“just you being there no matter what is enough” peak romance true love the devotion the dedication I’m a wreck

LE SMOOCH! LE MARRIAGE! INCREDIBLE I LOVE THEM

~end review~

Okay where is my epilogue please and thank you

#shards of shards #couragedontdesertme #Trish’s fics #shards #shardsverse #elsarik

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lliaq · 4 years

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okay, now that I’ve slept on it I’m actually gonna try to put down my thoughts on the season, so obvious TUA season 2 spoilers below and it’s probably going to get really long

Just to preface this, I haven’t read any of the comics, so I can’t speak to how the show compares to them.

Guess I’m gonna start with the positives, and I think what I enjoyed most about the season where just little moments between the siblings. Obvious standouts being Ben getting to talk to Vanya and Diego. I think those were the only two scenes that acutally made me tear up a bit. It was just really nice seeing him get that opportunity, and something that I’ve wanted to see since S1. It would have been even nicer if he got a moment with all his siblings, but hey, I’ll take what I can get. Another one was at the very end with Vanya and Diego just sitting on the stairs together. Just a nice little moment, even if it was short.

Luther apologizing to Vanya was a pleasant surprise and showed that he actually used his time alone to reflect and have a bit of character growth, so that was another plus.

I overall liked Allison and Ray’s relationship, and I was okay with the way it ended. It was kind of bittersweet, but it made sense and felt in character.

On that note, I also liked that Allison learned to achieve things without her powers, because never having to do that was kind of a big note of her character in S1. Not necessarily sure it had to be done by taking her voice away, I think if anything it would have been even better if she did it by choice, but I’ll get back to that.

I enjoyed the whole old Five vs “young” Five thing. Not much more to add to that, really.

And lastly, I enjoyed Reginal a lot more than I thought I would. It was interesting to see a bit of a different side of him when he was with Grace, felt like it gave his character a bit more depth, and I mean the actor is just fantastic. Like, I fucking despise Reginald, but it’s a joy to watch his performance. The way he went in on Diego at the dinner was fucking brutal, man. That was heartbreaking to watch, and the fact that none of the others stood up for him sucked, but honestly I think it just shows that despite them bonding a little, they still have a ways to go in terms of being a functional family. S1 didn’t span all that much time, and they were separated for most of their time in the 60s, so it makes sense that they’re still learning in that department. Them getting into the car with Vanya showed that they’re getting there though. Also, to get back to Reginald, I think they’ve made it pretty clear now that he’s an alien, so there’s that too. No more confusion about that.

Now on to the so-so stuff. Things that were neither all good nor all bad.

Vanya & Sissy - oh boy man. I mean first of all: give me that lesbian farm life, hell yes. I was rooting for them from the start, and I just really loved all their interactions. Also, idk if that was intentional on Ellen’s part or not, but her chemistry with Sissy was leagues above whatever the fuck was going on with Leonard. That being said- I’m personally not a fan of cheating storylines, just in general. I get why, in this case, but yeah. And unlike with Ray, I really wish they would have taken Sissy and Harlan with them to 2019. Because, for one: can we at least have one happy gay couple on this show? And second: They both deserved to have a life where they’re not constantly judged for who they are. From a character standpoint I get that going to the future would be really scary and shit, but just imagine man. Vanya and Sissy could have been together without having to hide, and Harlan could have vastly benefited from the better understanding of autism we have now. Not that either of those aspects are perfect in 2019, but they’re a long way from the 60s.

Diego and Lila’s relationship I honestly didn’t care much about. It felt like they just completely dismissed Patch and the impact her death had, by not even so much as giving her a mention. And I also just didn’t really feel it man. I mean they spent some time together in the asylum, but it seemed like they weren’t even friends really - and then by the end of the season they love each other, like girl, it’s been less than a week. Relax.

Lila on her own, I did kind of like, but I feel like she could have used a bit more development, and a little less ‘I had sex with this guy once like five days ago and now I love him more than anything’

Ben. Ben Ben Ben. I was kind of up and down on his arc. I actually liked that he was just so done with Klaus’ shit, even if calling Dave a fling might have crossed the line a bit for me. Some of the posession stuff was weird (though I’m glad they at least had the ground rules talk), but at the same time getting to see him experience the most basic sensations like air on his face and dirt under his feet was nice. He did also save the world through the power of communication and love, so you know- good job, Ben. And then they killed him (again). Ngl, I was pissed at that- but I figured they would probably find a way to bring him back somehow, so I held off judgement on that until the end, and I was right. Still not entirely happy, and whether or not that’s going to change will likely depend on what happens with S3.

Klaus’ cult story line was kind of eh. I didn’t hate it, but I didn’t really like it either. His attempts to save Dave were more interesting, even if they ultimately didn’t work. Other than that, he didn’t really go through any growth this season. It did piss me off that Allison enabled his drinking after he relapsed. Fuck that.

I’m glad we got to see a little bit of how Allison losing her voice affected her, but I think they could have done more there. Idk, it just felt a bit lackluster for something so huge. Like I mentioned earlier, her living a life of never actually having to work for anything was something that shaped her character and personality in S1, and I‘m glad she’s had that realization. That being said, I think it would have been even more impactful if she worked for what she wanted w/o using her powers by choice, showing that she was was willing to put in the effort to grow and change, rather than being forced into it by circumstance. But you know, sometimes life works like that, and people don’t change unless they’re forced into a situation where they have no other option.

And, somewhat related, I think the last point for this section is Allison and Vanyas relationship. While I’m glad that they’re closer now, I wish they would have at least adressed Vanya slitting her throat. I understand that Allison doesn’t blame her, we already saw that at the end of S1, but c’mon. At least have a short conversation about it, because that was a big thing. It feels like they just used that to fuel the ‘Allison needs to learn how to do things without her powers’ storyline, and then it just got dropped, never to be mentioned again. The show tends to do that a lot, and it completely diminishes the impact of these big moments.

Okay, now to the purely negatives, here we go.

Luther moping over Allison. For the love of god. Listen, Luther did grow on me this season, compared to S1 - but I was so fed up with his moping around. Can we just not do the incest thing anymore, please. I already went through that shit with Shadowhunters (except there it at least wasn’t actually incest), I don’t wanna do it again.

Harlan. I honestly did not care for him at all. That being said, I usually don’t care about child characters, so that’s not a big surprise and not necessarily the show’s fault. But also, the fuck even was that storyline. I’m sorry, but it just made no sense. Which actually leads me right to the next point

Inconsistently written powers. Diego doing the thingy with the bullets like since when tf can he do that? I understand that the show already changed his powers from the comics, but up until that point it was strictly about knives. We never see him curve or manipulate (or whatever it is he actually does) any other objects, so this just felt so random and out of nowhere, and like they just wanted to give him a ‘badass powers moment’. If they wanted to indicate that his powers were more than what we’ve seen in S1, literally all they had to do was have him use them on something that’s not a knife at any point in the season. A 2 second shot, done. And then you don’t get to the finale and are suddenly like “the fuck”. But, boy, Vanya was even worse. Sounds. That’s what we learn her powers are in S1. Sounds, she manipulates sounds and sound waves. So how in the everliving fuck does she a) bring someone back to life, b) tranfser part of her powers to that person and create a magical connection, and c) take that part of her powers back? None of that makes any sense whatsover. The stuff in S1 where she’s sucking the life out of her siblings was already a stretch, but they’ve just made it worse this season. And this is just a minor gripe with the VFX, but her floating out of the barn looked so bad. I know it’s hard to make floating/flying people look good and natural, but other shows and movies have done it, so it’s not like it’s impossible.

And lastly: The villains. They were terrible, period.

I don’t like the Handler that much, she’s just so...plain and boring and really the only thing she has going for her are the outfits. Nice outfits don’t make a good story though. But the Swedes were even worse. Just every scene they were in felt like it dragged and I just wanted to skip past it. And then they have the fucking funeral scene with swedish Adele like are you kidding me? Am I supposed to feel bad for these pieces of white toast with zero personality or development? ??? Honestly, they could have cut them out completely and replaced them with more development for Lila and I would have been perfectly happy with that. Or replaced them with literally anything else. I don’t think I would have felt like I was missing anything important. Also, AJ? What was up with that? Again, haven’t read the comics so idk if he’s a big deal or not in them, but I really thought he would play a bigger role. That felt like such a waste of a character and like what even was the point?

I really feel like AoS (esp. S1-4) raised my bar for well written and developed villains. Admittedly, a 22 episode season allows for a lot more time to actually do that than a 10 episode season, but still. If you have less time to develop characters, then you need tighter writing and TUA completely dropped the ball on that one.

Okay. I think that’s it. I mean, I probably forgot a bunch of stuff, but these were the things most prominently on my mind after letting everything sink in for a bit. Overall I’m pretty meh about the season as a whole. I’ll probably watch S3 (if they renew it, that is), but I’m not super hyped about it or anything. The only thing keeping me interested are sibling interactions and the Ben reveal (even though his emo hair is an atrocity. I’m sorry Ben, I love you, but no.)

#tua #tua spoilers #boy this got longer than I thought it would

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forgenotes-archived · 4 years

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VERONICA ROSE SAWYER AND THE MUSIC OF ST VINCENT .

word count : 3,006 . trigger warnings for : child abuse / neglect , depression , self harm , suicide , murder .

there are a few points that i will be ignoring - namely , clarke’s music does have a heavy focus on catholicism that ronnie , as a jewish woman , won’t relate to necessarily on a literal level . i might purposely misinterpret some of the more catholic songs , but for the most part , i’ll just . . . skip over that shit , lol .

of course , not every song of hers makes perfect sense with veronica , but there are a substantial amount that really hit home for characterization purposes . i’ll be pretty brief about them mostly due to the fact that this is going to be long enough but !

please enjoy a massive post about veronica’s most influential muse inspiration , st vincent , and how each song sparks a different facet of her characterization , personality , and history .

ALBUM ONE - MARRY ME .

*** NOW , NOW . this song is one of five songs that truly cuts to the very core of veronica’s persona . it is written as a cutting dismantlement of preconceived notions ; and while that in a general sense does apply to her , it pulls apart as a particularly embittered attack on heather chandler . with the deconstruction of her worth to her ( i’m not your mother’s favourite dog / i’m not the carpet you walk on / i’m not the feather at your feet / i’m not the paw to your king / i’m not anyone you’ll beat ) , it harkens to her rebellion and powerful nature that’s been crushed under heather’s heel . the chorus and final lines of the song draw perfect parallels to her and heather’s fight at the party , and the inevitable death - you don’t mean that , say you’re sorry / i’ll make you sorry . this track is desperately dramatically perfectly attached to my interpretation of ronnie .

*** YOUR LIPS ARE RED . this goes along almost chronologically with above - this song is about murder , explicitly ; and by god does that ever track ! particular lyrics of note are : this city’s red from riding us into the ground / your face is drawn from drawing words right from my lips / my hands are red from sealing your red lips / your skin’s so fair , it’s not fair . the narrative of the song leads towards a crime of passion ; anger and hate towards someone with some sort of power over them , and the eventual revenge for their ( perceived ) mistreatment . veronica doesn’t feel as bad as she should that heather’s gone ; a part of her feels satisfied , and that’s the part that this song exemplifies .

THE APOCALYPSE SONG . embracing the carnal nature of life and cutting away from those who refuse to ( or are too afraid to ) join you - in a more subdued sense , it’s similar to what veronica does in cutting loose from her friends ; and further still , ostracizing herself from her family to build a more spectacular life for herself and jason . important lyrics to note : you’ll awake with the stitches over both of your eyes , and deny me my body and all earthly delights / i guess you are afraid of what everyone is made of / your devotion has the look of a lunatic’s gaze .

LANDMINES . in terms of the tragedy of the beginnings of her and jason’s relationship - when he spirals into the worst parts of his plans , she is desperate to try and lure him back to the better side . it’s sadness , it’s hope without reason , it’s painful . important lyrics to note : i’m crawling through landmines just to know where you are / there’s smoke in my eyes , ‘cause you’re burning the ground / i’m crawling through landmines - i know , ‘cause i planted them / under cover of night , i put my heart in the ground / where’d you go ? please don’t go / i found your glove with the leather torn , five fingers that i’m counting on , smoke signals to call you right here .

ALBUM TWO - ACTOR .

THE STRANGERS . clarke said she’d written this song about a woman who’s spoiled by decadence and leisure , but is desperately sad by her situation . which , in all honesty , fits veronica to a t - exhausted by the picturesque garden , and unwilling to continue being trimmed to fit in paradise . important lyrics to note : lover , i don’t play to win , but for the thrill ‘till i’m spent / you showed up with a black eye , ready to go start a fight / desperate don’t look good on you , neither does your virtue / paint the black hole blacker .

THE NEIGHBOURS . the song paints a picture of a hatred of suburban sedentary lifestyles ; partial arson , partial alcoholism , all very accurate to the way ronnie feels being stuck in sherwood ohio . important lyrics to note : let’s pour wine in coffee cups and drive around the neighbourhood / i won’t believe not a word you speak just make it sweet to hear / these kids are foaming at�� the mouths , psychotropic capricorns / how can monday be alright , then on tuesday lose my mind ?

* BLACK RAINBOW . this is a portrait of one person in their isolation of an elevated comprehension above the brainwashed masses of average american life - the loneliness in their own self - aggrandizing thought processes , but also the pangs of hopelessness when they know that they’re still right . veronica is allowed an understanding that her parents and these remington assholes have chosen to ignore . important lyrics to note : think i’m glass , think i’m breaking it / let the children act like furniture for the ladies of the lawn / unkissed boys and girls of paradise lining up around the block / back pocket full of dynamite while the neighbours talk and talk / bird outside the kitchen , fighting his reflection , what’s he gonna win when he wins ? / if you want the neighbours woke , you’ll have to shout even louder .

* LAUGHING WITH A MOUTH OF BLOOD . clarke has described this song as a balancing act between the pain of the past and the uncertainty of the future , and the desperation that’s found when those two roads meet . ronnie’s got scars she’s healing from , but she’s also got no idea why and how to keep on living afterwards . important lyrics to note : just like an amnesiac , trying to get my senses back / laughing with a mouth of blood from a little spill i took / all my old friends aren’t so friendly , and all my old haunts are now haunting me / i can’t see the future but i know it’s watching me .

MARROW . a vague song , but one that resonates deeper with ronnie than she expected through its undertones of feeling as though she’s not in control of her body . important lyrics to note : i wish i had a gentle mind and spine made up of iron / mouth connects to the teeth and teeth to the loves and the curses / so i pretend there aren’t ten strings tied to all ten of my fingers .

THE PARTY . a dreamscape of a song that touches on her subtle alcoholism and desperation for connections that never come . veronica’s coping mechanisms lead her into bad habits in order to make connections , but ultimately leave her completely floundering after everything’s over . important lyrics to note : i’d pay anything to keep my conscience clean / there aren’t enough hands to point all the fingers / i lick the ice cube from your empty glass / honey , the party , you went away quickly / i’ve said much too much and they’re trying to sweep up .

* JUST THE SAME BUT BRAND NEW . this song is a floating heartbreak , following the descent into depression st vincent falls into after losing somebody she loves - did she do something wrong ? where do i go from now ? how do i fill this hole in my heart ? veronica feels this on a lesser level towards her friends , however few she may have had ; but in its fullest extent after jd , because despite everything ( fear , pain , abuse ) , she still loves him for what she thought she had . important lyrics to note : so i walked away all perfumed , felt just the same but brand new / and anything you wrote i checked for codes and clues / i changed my ‘a’s and ‘i’s to yours / i do my best impression of weightlessness now too / i might be wrong , i might be wrong , i might be wrong , but honey i believed i could just float away , dangling .

ALBUM THREE - STRANGE MERCY .

* CHEERLEADER . a determined cry to reject the role being forced upon her ; a final stand to shed the expectations thrown over her , while also reminiscing on how these constraints have forced veronica to become afraid of being vulnerable . important lyrics to note : i’ve had good times with some bad guys / i’ve told whole lies with a half smile / i don’t know what good it serves , pouring my purse in the dirt / i’ve played dumb when i knew better / i don’t know what i deserve , but your you i could work / i don’t wanna be a cheerleader no more , i don’t wanna be a dirt eater no more .

DILETTANTE . a brutal cutting slice of her and jason dean’s relationship - a desire to stay , but a desperation to bring their passion back down to earth . partially a love song , trying to preserve their fire without burning up ; partially a lament about overcoming the fear of stagnation . important lyrics to note : nobody’s winning , the sharks are swimming in the red / while you are sleeping , my mind goes creaking down the wall / slow down dilettante so i can limp beside you , i’m following your houndstooth / street savant , my bank in my back pocket , how far you think it’d take us ? / but let’s not forget why we crawled here .

ALBUM FOUR - ST VINCENT .

* PRINCE JOHNNY . this is the second song in a trilogy about an archetype of a friend clarke has named “ johnny ” - this particular angle focuses on the helpless desperation to stop someone you care about from falling down a dangerous , self - destructive path . in veronica’s eyes , jason is her prince johnny . important lyrics to note : prince johnny , you’re kind but you’re not simple , by now , i think i know the difference / saw you pray to all to make you a real boy / prince johnny , you’re kind , but do be careful / don’t mistake my affection for another spit - and - penny style redemption / i wanna mean more than i mean to you .

DIGITAL WITNESS . a cutting dialogue on the desperation for popularity ; in modern day , it’s a critique of social media and societal pressures , but in terms of veronica’s timeline , it doubles as a light on westerburg’s obsession with their queen bees . important lyrics to note : i want all of your mind / if i can’t show it , if you can’t see me , what’s the point of doing anything ? / this is no time for confessing / if you can’t see me , watch me jump right off the london bridge / get back to your stare , i care , but i don’t care / what’s the point of even sleeping ? so i stop sleeping / won’t somebody sell me back to me ?

REGRET . a self - explanatory song , in all reality ; you are afraid to move , and your anxiety keeps you away from opportunity - before you even realize you’ve wasted your potential , you’re doomed . veronica is trapped in a vicious cycle that won’t allow her to spread her wings ; fear begets fear , and life moves on without her . important lyrics to note : memories so bright i gotta squint just to recall / regret the words i’ve bitten more than the ones i ever said / i’m afraid of heaven because i can’t stand the heights / i’m afraid of you because i can’t be left behind / oh well , there’s a red moon rising / the door slammed and it felt like a cannonball .

ALBUM FIVE - MASSEDUCTION .

SUGARBOY . a mashup of a love song and an ode to vicious bisexuality ; a heart that is sharp and easy to slice yourself open on , but a reciprocal appreciation of the danger that comes with falling for someone . ronnie’s sugarboy is jason ; but she also learns to acknowledge that she wouldn’t have minded finding a sugargirl , either . important lyrics to note : sugarboy , i am weak , got a crush on tragedy / oh here i go - a tragedy , hanging off from the balcony / making a scene , oh here i am , your pain machine / sugargirl , dissolve in me , got a crush from kicked - in teeth / pledge all your allegiance to me / i am a lot like you , i am alone like you .

* LOS AGELESS . again - a mashup of a love song , and a loss of all autonomy . what have you lost ; a lover , or your sense of self ? veronica’s lost both , and she doesn’t know what else to do but fall into the ease of her prison position , following the orders of someone who claims to know better than she does . important lyrics to note : burn the pages of unwritten memoires , but i can keep running / but how can i leave ? i just follow the hood of my car / how can anybody have you and lose you and not lose their mind , too ? / i guess that’s just me , honey - i guess that’s how i’m built / i try to tell you i love you , but it comes out all sick / i try to write you a love song , but it comes out a lament .

SLOW DISCO . finding yourself in the crowd of a party , but not liking who you see - a contrast between the life you should be living , and the life you’re actually living . veronica falls to one side more than the other , and by trying to find herself in other people , she’s doing herself a grave disservice that leaves her feeling almost as if she’s a ghost . important lyrics to note : am i thinking what everybody else is thinking ? i’m so glad i came but i can’t wait to leave / slip my hand from your hand , leave you dancing with a ghost / there’s blood in my ears and a fool in the mirror / the bay of mistakes can’t get any clearer / don’t it beat a slow dance to death ?

* SMOKING SECTION . self - destruction . self harm . the call of the void . suicidal urges . it’s a song about trying to overcome these feelings by giving them a name , and remembering that they’re thoughts you can work through . veronica’s felt them her entire life . important lyrics to note : sometimes i sit in the smoking section , hoping one rogue spark will land in my direction / and when you stomp me out i’ll scream and i’ll shout “ let it happen , let it happen , let it happen ” / sometimes i stand with a pistol in hand / sometimes i stand on the edge of my roof , and i think i’ll jump just to punish you / and then i think , what could be better than love ? / it’s not the end , it’s not the end , it’s not the end , it’s not the end .

BONUS LEVEL - LOVE THIS GIANT .

* ICE AGE . written as a prequel of sorts to cheerleader off her album strange mercy , clarke has said it’s a get it together song of sorts . veronica’s in her own ice age ; she’s frozen over to protect herself , but in doing so , she’s deprived herself of the experience of living . important lyrics to note : oh , diamond , it’s such a shame to see you this way , your own little ice age / seams are showing , and you’re freaking me out / we don’t know how much we’ve lost until the winter thaws / it’s close to your bones , it’s far from your shell / feel it away , reason it out .

#❝ - 𝙄𝙏 '𝙎 𝘼 𝙂𝙊𝙊𝘿 𝙆𝙄𝙉𝘿 𝙊𝙁 𝙎𝘼𝘿 . / meta.#ok i just really love st vincent????#GOD i hope this stays under the cut when i post it since im dash only.....#P R A Y F O R M E #if not i will simply copy it into a doc and post a link #there was a POWERFUL LINE in a song that i just. couldn't justify keeping- but FUCK #in huey newton; the line 'fake knife / real ketchup' strikes me as a HUGE ronnie vibe #but like. the rest of the song is too disconnected to attach to her iuhrtkjgnd #and with THAT.... i fucking DISAPPEAR.....#and i made myself.... Anxious lol

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