#i tried to hide it cos i was wearing a mask but the mask don't hide my eyes so

[rainbepourin]

What do when the dietitian I can barely afford pushes me to go to a therapist to """"""feel good about yourself that's the most important thing. It's not like you're overweight"""""""

Like girl, I don't come to you for this. I don't come to you to convince me not to want the results I want, i come to you to get them

#tbf i did cry in her office #not like sobbing or anything but uh the tears oh my god #i couldn't hold it back #i tried to hide it cos i was wearing a mask but the mask don't hide my eyes so #anyway #I'm just fucking sad #I'm just sad #oof I cried a lot though i cried so much I'm nauseous #I'll never be happy

[sandy-the-glader]

Hi!! I hope this is okay!! If not, no worries!! 💜💜💜 (I love you lots!)

Can I please request an Adrian Chase x fem!innocent!reader Where while Adrian is out and about doing his Vigilante work he comes across a bunch of criminals in a warehouse, and after they’re all “taken care of”, he hears someone crying and finds a girl hiding behind a pile of the criminal’s stuff, and she’s handcuffed to something over there, so she couldn’t leave even if she wanted to. She’d obviously be completely terrified of Vig, but as we know, he is very good at reading a person and would clearly see that she is innocent, and had been taken by the bad guys. Normally he would just set the innocent girl free and be on his way, having already taken care of the bad guys, however… He had unfortunately taken off his mask right before finding her, and had forgotten to put it back on, so she has seen his face. Panicking, he just picks her up, and takes her to his car with him, driving straight to the 11th Street Kids HQ, carrying in a terrified Y/n, he himself all panicked, and the team is like “wtf did you do????” “Did you abduct her???” And he’s just like, “No no, I saved her! But then she saw my face… So I guess, yes??”

Lmao it’s honestly a mess, but the team takes care of Y/n’s injuries, apologies for Adrian’s behavior lmao, and lets her stay there until she has recovered, as not only is she hurt, but very scared. After a while of staying with them, she gradually starts warming up to Adrian, him desperately trying to get her not to be afraid of him anymore (for a while there she was terrified of him), and their relationship eventually grows into a more romantic and intimate one🥺🥺🤧

Afraid of Me

*Not my gif*

Character: Adrian Chase x SoftFem!Reader

Type: Fluff and sorta angsty

Length: 5.4K (a bit long)

Summary: Request above <3

Trope: Strangers to friends to lovers, Slow-burn

A/N: LONG A/N!! Sorry this took forever I've been busy with a lot of stuff and I just haven't had any time but I worked on this whenever I could. Btw again I bent the request a little bit (I'm not sure if I wrote what you wanted for it and I apologize ) so I hope it’s okay I just made this go over the whole period of time the show does and like more so there's more time for a bond to be built lol

I heard a quick gunshot followed by another. Tears continued to fall from my eyes as I was tied to some random wall in some warehouse, Apparently, I was not supposed to come across two men selling heroin to each other but here I am. They claimed I saw too much, took me, and tied me up. Who even does that?

I just wanted to return to my apartment and read this new book I bought. That's all I had planned for my day anyway. Yet now I was tied to a pole in some wet and cold warehouse with random crates surrounding me. I tugged and tried to break from but it was helpless. I cried and sniffled as I continued to try but there was no avail.

Were those shots from them or someone else? Please god, let someone save me. I had been here for hours and I was scared of what they had planned for me. They already hit me pretty hard over the head which caused a small trail of blood to fall from my temple.

I heard loud and heavy footsteps coming towards me. I braced myself and waited for the figure to come around the crate to where I was. He was wearing a teal suit, with blood covering it. It was Vigilante. Should I be happy or terrified? He's a killer but isn't he supposed to be a hero?

"Fuck oh my god." He gasped slapping a gloved hand over his mouth. He was missing one exceptionally important part of his suit. His mask. That must have been why he was so frantic.

In all honesty, he looked nothing like I always pictured him. He was lanky with glasses and he looked really young. He looked mid-twenties though I had a feeling he was older. He honestly looked nerdy.

"I'm sorry. I really won't tell anyone who you are. I-I mean I don't even know your name." I stammered. He didn't care though because he continued to curse.

"Fuck fuck fuck. This is so not good." he groaned. The man ran a thick hand through his hair while bouncing back and forth. "Umm." He pondered confused about what to do. "Shit, I can't let you go." My eyes widen. He already has saved me why not let me go on my merry way? He took off his glasses and put his mask back on.

He came over to me and examined my situation. He crouched down and started untieing the rope that kept me on the pole but didn't bother with the ones around my hands or feet.

I was about to thank him for his acts but he picked me up and started to carry me out. Oh, he's actually not letting me go.

"What are you doing!?" I panicked. I started wiggling my body in his grasp then he held me tighter. "Where are you taking me? This hurts." He continued to keep walking until we reached his car a couple of feet from the warehouse.

Holding me with one hand, he opened the door to his back seat and tossed me in. Judging by his face, he didn't mean it to be as aggressive but it was enough to get me to shut up. He slammed the door and rushed over to the driver's seat.

This is it. After all that's happened today I'm being kidnapped by Vigilante and who knows what's going to happen. I guess the law doesn't apply when it comes to him. I actually can't believe it right now.

The entire car ride was silent. Not a sound from the man or from me. It was terrifying. All I could think of was what was going to happen to me. it took him forever to get to his destination and when we got there I realized it was some rundown video store. That couldn't be where we're going right?

-

"Guy's we got a fucking situation!" Adrian called opening the door with the girl in his hands. The whole team in the building stared at him with wide 'What the fuck' like eyes.

"Who the fuck is that?" Economos asked adjusting his glasses and leaning over his desk.

Adrian (not so carefully) dropped the woman on the floor making her yelp out in shock and pain.

"Did you just kidnap a girl?" Adebayo's eyes widened at the sight.

"No Adebayo!" He yelled defensively. "Okay, well technically yes but-" He was cut off quickly.

"And why did you bring her here?" Harcourt burst out running a hand through her blonde hair.

"Okay, I was doing my badass stuff, right? Like beating up these bad dudes and I found her behind some crates." They all stared at him waiting for him to continue. "And since I didn't know these dudes took a hostage I took my mask off and that's-" He removed his mask again and replaced the glasses on his face. "Really bad." He grimaced.

"Adrian what the hell dude you could have left her. She would have never turned you in. Look at her. No offense." Chris said. She stayed silent like she never heard the comment in the first place.

She was scared to death, trembling on the floor with small tear streaks down her face. Some of the tears mixed in with blood on the left side of her face. She looked innocent as could be and she definitely didn't deserve to be in this mess.

"Dude what the fuck!" He shouted at Chris. "Now she knows my real name! You have so fucked me!" He continued to cure which didn't make the girl feel any better.

"I did not fuck you! Besides it's your fault for bringing her here anyway." Chris furrowed his eyebrows looking back and forth between the petrified girl and his idiotic friend.

"What is happening out here?" Murn came out from one of the rooms and immediately regretted his decision. "We're supposed to be working on the project butterfly case what are you doing Chase?" He asked sternly.

"Oh, now she knows about Project Butterfly!" Harcourt placed a hand on her forehead.

"Well, it's not like I can kill her because she's innocent" The girl's face drained at the mention of death. "and we can't get rid of her because she might tell someone who I am!" Adrian wined out. He was finally right about one thing.

"She also might screw our plan up," Murn muttered trying to think of a reasonable thing to do with this girl.

"Then what do you suppose we do with her?" Economos folded his arms. The girl had been silent the entirety of this conversation but she finally piped up.

"Um.." Her voice caught everyone's attention and they turned their heads to look at her. "I-I can clean and o-organize around here." She stammered. "I can help you guys just please don't kill me." She pleaded. They all non-verbally agreed she had been through enough judging by the look of blood running from her temple and dirt caking her shirt.

"Yeah that honestly could be useful," Harcourt spoke. She looked around the room to only be met with agreeing faces. She let out another deep sigh before Murn spoke up.

"You will work the same hours as us and will get paid a fair amount." He folded his arms tightly over his chest. He didn't ask he just demanded she work.

"I'm also a fast learner and I can help you with anything you need. I don't have a current job so that would be perfect." She tried to look at the bright side of the situation. I can work for money but this is a destructive and hard-core business she pondered. "And since this is a very um dangerous job I just so happened to be trained in medical care." She offered.

"Oh, sweet! That's perfect so now dyed bear can stop doing such a shit job of stitching me up!" Chris smiled.

"Hey!" Economos protested. It was perfectly fine he thought.

"What about my living situation? C-can I still stay In my apartment?" She asked. They all looked around at each other because that was one thing they hadn't thought of. If they let her stay, she could always tell people without them knowing.

"If we let you stay in your apartment, you must realize he" Murn pointed at Adrian Chase himself. "has to keep watch of you? He somehow always knows if someone is doing something they shouldn't be." She nodded slowly. "And if you tell anyone and I mean anyone you will be terminated immediately, do you understand?" He spoke firmly making her hands tremble.

"I understand." She muttered.

"Now that everyone is done with this whole situation I suggest you get back to work," Murn concluded walking back to his office annoyed with the inconvenience.

-

I sat there absolutely stunned at what just happened. I just got myself into a bat shit crazy job. I mean I don't even know these people and one of them literally abducted me. This is not normal.

Project butterfly? Are these guys all heroes or something? I already was aware of Vigilante's existence and somewhat Peacemaker but there's a lot more than just those two.

"Oh my god, he didn't even untie you." The blonde-haired woman spoke in surprise. I didn't say anything because really what was I supposed to say? "I'm Harcourt." She kneeled beside me. She opened a switchblade and sliced through the ropes binding my hands together and then my feet. "Come on let's get you cleaned up. She went and collected the first aid kit from one of the desks on the left side of the room and motioned for me to sit at her desk. "What's your name?" She asked.

"Y/n L/n." I said quietly as I stared into my lap anxiously.

"Come sit Y/n." She said calmly trying to make me comfortable.

I stood up uneasily and almost fell back down. I steadied myself and carefully walked over to the chair and sat down gently. She pulled out a couple of cotton swabs and some alcohol. She poured the strong liquid onto the small ball.

"I'm sorry about him." Harcourt hummed taking the cotton swab to my forehead.

"Hm?" I replied softly.

"Adrian." She looked me in the eyes. "He just isn't all there sometimes." She mumbled. She tossed the bloodied-up swab in the trash and put a bandage over the small cut.

I looked over at Vigilante who I guess was named Adrian. He was talking to Peacemaker and he looked perfectly innocent. Not even an hour earlier he was tossing me into the back of his car. Jesus, what did I really get myself into? Not only does he have to escort me home, but now I have to work with him. He's a psycho!

"She has a point you know." The woman I was pretty sure was Adebayo spoke up. I glanced at her and she nodded trying to make me realize it. "He's a really good guy you just have to get to know him. I get it he basically kidnapped you but he's stupid in everything but fighting."

"Yeah okay," I mumbled softly. I don't care what they say now I can't trust him after what he did unless he really proves he's trustworthy. At least these people actually had the decency to tend to my wounds.

She continued to bandage and take care of every cut I had on my arms and face. I enjoyed her already because she was delicate to me and cared about my feelings. Pretty quickly she finished and put all the materials away.

"Come over here I think we found a box of old clothes you could change in." She led me back into the store and I could feel Adrian's eyes burning into my back.

-

"Dude she's afraid of me!" I panicked at Chris looking him dead in the eye. I waited for her to leave before I talked to my best friend about the whole thing.

"Well, I mean you did throw her in the back of your car. Chicks don't really dig that. Unless they're like hardcore." Okay yeah obviously I fucked up big time but I was under a lot of pressure and I wasn't doing what I should have!

"Dude I didn't know what else to do." I whined

"I mean you just gotta make things right with her I guess. I don't know I usually don't have to apologize to girls." He shrugged his shoulders. Great okay how am I supposed to do that when she's obviously afraid of me? Fuck. "Listen when you walk her to her apartment just be like 'Sorry for kidnapping you in my shitty car that was a pretty bad thing to do!' or something like that." I let out a heavy sigh. This is never going to work.

-

I came back out to the main room in a sweatshirt with the video store's logo on it and sweatpants that were longer than my actual legs with the same logo down the side of it. I held my original clothes in my arms and I was quiet.

What do I do now? Go home? How am I supposed to feel safe in my own home when I know that guy is watching me?

"Listen." Harcourt grabbed my attention. "You can take as much time as you need before you go home. I know that was probably a traumatic experience for you so let me know when you want to leave." She spoke as if she had read my mind. I nodded. "Also we have your address so we can get you home easily." Okay well, I told her my name and that was all it took to find out where I lived. Spectacular.

"What are my work hours?" I still can't believe I got myself to work for these people.

"Just don't get here any later than 8. Hours are different every day. Since you now work here I guess I should tell you who everyone is." She pointed to Peacemaker and Vigilante who were still chatting near the corner of the room "Chris and Adrian ." Then to the other man in glasses. "Economos." The guy in the other room that I could see through the glass. "Murn." Finally, she pointed at the last girl which I already knew. "and Adebayo."

I stood around for not too much longer before very anxiously describing to Harcourt my wishes to leave. She understood fully and went over to Adrian to make him take me home. He looked at me with some sort of care in his eyes but I just couldn't look at him so my eyes fell back to the sight of the floor.

"Come on kid." Harcourt motioned with her head to leave out the door with the man. I walked out the door and the cool air hit me as the sun started to sink down below the horizon.

One car ride and then I'm home. This time I got to sit in the front seat of his car instead of being thrown in the back like a doll. I secured my seatbelt and then just slumped against the car door. All I could really do was pay attention to the passing cars outside and the quiet buzz of the radio.

I also noticed the pleasing smell of his cologne that filled the car or how he hummed along to the Taylor Swift song on the radio. Someone like him is a swiftie?

"I'm sorry that I kidnapped you." Adrian broke the silence between us in an attempt to apologize. I ignored it and kept looking out the window. It was a long day and I genuinely couldn't tell if he was being sincere or was just trying to make me feel like he cared. "Please talk to me. I know I fucked up." I glanced over at him; his eyes flickered between the road and me. "Hey." He reached for my hand and flinched away with wide eyes and a quickened heartbeat.

His eyes lit up in sorrow. He looked like he felt bad. He backed off and for the rest of the car ride, he didn't talk anymore. There was so much tension in that car I felt like I was going to suffocate. I could barely look at him. I was still scared of his guts.

Every turn and stop made me think over and over about the events that occurred today. It was nauseating.

Finally walking through the door of my apartment left me with this feeling I couldn't describe. All of the events that happened today were fucking unbelievable.

The book I was planning to read was on my bed and was quickly tossed on my side table with a small thud. I sprawled out on my bed not bothering to do anything else tonight.

What. The. Fuck.

-

It's my first day on the job and my teammate already hit someone with a car. A van actually. I got to the disguised video store a bit after seven and Murn described the plan to me. Since I wasn't significant to the plan I just stayed in the car with a first-aid kit just in case things went south. And oh they did.

"Is he dead!?" I stood in the van looking at Economos dumbfounded. He didn't reply at first he was just making shocked quivering noises.

"I... I don't know?" My eyes widened as he started to get out of the car holding a crowbar tightly in his hands. I left the kit on the seats (since I had been fidgeting with the latches the whole ride) and followed him for support or something like that. Maybe I thought I could help. He inspected inside the car which he had hit fully force.

Judomaster was crawling on the ground in front of the car slowly. Economos inched closer and closer to him holding the crowbar. He whacked him once over the head and jolted backward then his body went limp. We waited and sure enough, he kept crawling. He hit him again and he still was moving. I slapped a hand over my mouth as he repeatedly hit him on the back of the head. He poked him a few times like you would a bug making sure he wasn't moving.

"Oh my god." He let out. "Fuck yeah!" He turned around to high-five me. I lightly returned it. "Don't worry he's not dead." He said sensing my shock. "They're hardcore it takes a lot."

"Well, what do we do with him now?" I looked at Economos for ideas. We ended up tying him up and throwing him in the back of the van. I watched him intensely. When would this dude wake up? I really hope not any time soon. Murn radioed us and let us know that they would be coming back soon with of course Vigilante. Economos drove us back to the spot we were supposed to be in and awaited their arrival.

"You're pretty cool." I complimented him. He was taken aback by the positive words.

"Well thank you." He adjusted his glasses with a bright smile.

We waited for 15 minutes until they finally arrived and loaded themselves into the van. Everyone looked untouched besides Harcourt's messy hair, a couple cuts on Peacemaker's face and Vigilante crying about his bleeding toe. I grabbed the medical kit I had set down on the seats just minutes before and rushed to Adrian's side.

I motioned for him to move his foot up to where I needed it. He hesitated for a moment but then proceeded to lift his foot into my lap. I scoped out his injured toe and I pulled out the needed materials.

Yikes. I was definitely glad that I stayed in the van. Adrian’s foot jerked in my lap as I tried to get some alcohol.

"Hold still!" I complained to Adrian trying to hold his leg down from wriggling under my grasp. From the looks of it, this man had managed to get half of his pinky toe cut off. That is such a bizarre thing for torture.

“It hurts so bad though!” He wined when I took the alcohol to his foot. He had obviously had worse happen to him but this?

“It could have been worse,” I said. My hold got tighter on his leg since it kept jolting side to side.

“Pft yeah, this was nothing!” He lied as if he hadn’t been complaining two seconds ago. “I’ve gone through worse in DND.” A small smile appeared on my cheeks. DND huh? Who knew the big strong Vigilante was a total nerd? And a swiftie...

“One of my characters got their arm bitten off by a bear so I’d say you’re okay,” I said. His eyes lit up at the mention that I had played before." Just sit still it's about to get worse." His eyes clenched shut.

"Oh shit!" He screamed out making everyone irritated in the van. I shushed him gently with a soft hand on his leg. He shut up very quickly but his body still tensed occasionally with every sting. I held his foot carefully as I bandaged it up thoroughly.

"Are you hurt anywhere else?" I asked. I still didn't dare to look him in the eye.

"Yeah, but I can wait until we get back." He tried to act tough but I could hear the pain in his voice. I noticed a couple of holes in his shirt. Maybe I could fix his shirt while I'm at it. God am I being too nice?

I mean I'm trying to think of the bright side of what happened yesterday and honestly, it didn't seem so bad anymore. He saved my ass and I'm having a paying job. I can only imagine the pay is fantastic for what these people have me doing. I sat next to Adrian. I was feeling a little less scared of him now when I thought about him like that. Even through the visor, his eyes were peeled onto me. It felt like since I got here they never left.

Getting back to headquarters I couldn't get Adrian to get out of the van without making a scene. I dragged him quickly into the store so he wouldn't draw any attention from people lurking around In the streets. I pulled him by his hand and made him sit in the closest chair I could spot. He whined and moaned obnoxiously loud. I knew the stories and new articles about the man. He was tough and put up a big fight, he never lost against criminals.

I grabbed the larger bandages from an area Harcourt showed me just this morning and also some more alcohol.

"Show me where you're hurt." I looked at him curious about what else had happened to him. He pulled off his chest plate and revealed the deep stab wound in his shoulder. The fabric of his shirt clearly revealed the bloody mess it left. My eyes widen. "You kept this from me until now?"

"I could handle this. The toe I'm not entirely sure." I cleaned and bandaged the wound with intense concentration. I was careful and sure not to cause any more harm after this long night. "Thank you." He said softly. I just nodded and didn't reply with anything else.

-

The days passed as we worked on this project and the days were long and there was a lot of work to do. I didn't have almost any free time anymore so it was hard to make time for friends I actually wanted to talk to or things I really wanted to do. Adrian continued to try his hardest to earn my trust and befriend me.

I started to warm up to him crazy enough. He did little things for me I thought were sweet. Sometimes he brought me breakfast or he would try to learn about things I liked so he could talk about them with me. I started to trust him more and more as the mission proceeded because he was really good company. He would talk and I would listen.

A couple of days after the whole 'Adrian getting his pinky toe almost cut off' situation he got himself arrested. I didn't even know until Harcourt talked to me about it and what Adebayo said to him. I felt bad for him because as much as I thought I disliked him, I hated to hear he was where he was and how Adebayo literally manipulated him into doing it.

The night he got out he showed up at my apartment because he still needed to check up on me and since he hadn't been able to. For the first time, I felt comfortable enough to hug him. So I did, I wrapped my arms gently around his torso and gave a small squeeze. We stood like that for a minute before he quietly wished me a 'goodnight' without any further words. That was the kindest moment we had ever shared with one another

Then the next day we had another mission. Since all this time has passed, I had been informed on what a Butterfly fully was. At first, it was entirely confusing until I realized these were tiny alien butterflies here to kill us. I know it sounds like something straight out of a sci-fi movie.

I had to sit through a whole meeting in the morning next to Adrian where he (the whole time) joked with me. It felt sorta nice honestly. He never stopped being friendly and I just kind of started to accept it more.

And the whole mission went by quickly.

"Oh my god." I blurted when everyone arrived back in the truck. Peacemaker and Economos were fully drenched head to toe in blood, Harcourt had a good amount on her, and Adebayo and Adrian had little to none on them.

"We fought a fucking gorilla!" Adebayo exploded with astonishment. Jesus, sometimes I wish I didn't sit in the car the whole time.

"Economos is the fucking man." Peacemaker clapped him on the back with a proud grin. I did miss a lot if those two are now getting along.

"All the blood is the gorillas right?" I asked startled for a second considering the amount.

"Yeah we're all fine," Harcourt said tiredly.

"At least no one's arm got bitten off, like your DND character right?" Adrian nudged me in the side and sat down next to me. Sure I had only told him a few days ago about that but it still made me happy that he had remembered that tiny detail.

"Right." I smiled. Chris sat in the front and started playing music like he had at the beginning of the ride. I sang along with the rest of my team members to 11th Street Kids and I actually started to enjoy my work a little more.

I looked over at Adrian who was dancing like a dork. He looked so adorable? He was playing air drums and making up random dances as he went. I don't know why but I started to not hate him anymore. I started seeing this more personal side of him. Not Vigilante but Adrian.

"C'mon dance," Adrian whispered in my ear and nudged me again. I started to sway along with the group.

Later that night Harcourt made a group chat with all of us and sent a photo she had taken in the van. I set the book down I had finally got to reading beside me on my bed and picked up my phone.

Everyone was dancing in the van but on the right side, you could see me looking at Adrian with the sweetest smile on my face. The chat is filled with different emojis. The only number I had was Harcourts but from the merman emoji, I already knew it was Adrian. I liked his message and sent a fitting emoji to match the others.

I set my phone down and continued reading with a big smile. I never seemed to stop today.

-

It was the final day of the project and I wasn’t allowed to go. I wasn’t entirely complaining since this job was so bizarre but I was also disappointed. I mean all this build up and I don’t even get to go. They said it would be safer for me and of course, I understood.

But as the night carried on and the morning came through I was nervous. I had no texts or word from anyone. Sure, they still could be busy and have to do some other stuff before texting me but what if?

I heard a rushed-sounding knock on my door which threw me off. I ran to my door since the person decided to not stop knocking.

"What do you want?" I hissed as I threw open the door but I was only met with Adrian. My eyes soften upon seeing him. Oh, thank god he’s alive. "Adrian. Hi." I paused when noticing he was in a pair of shorts and a nursing gown. "Come inside." I ushered him in with wide eyes and closed the door quickly behind him. "What are you doing here?"

"Listen I jumped out of a hospital building to be her so-"

"Adrian!" I scolded him for being careless. I had started to really enjoy him I didn't need him being so careless all the time.

"Shut up. Sorry, but I need to tell you this." I stared at him silently with folded arms awaiting what he was about to tell me. "Okay, so after almost dying, I know what you're about to say please just wait. After almost dying, I realized had more feelings for you than I have ever had for someone and that's like a lot for me." He stepped closer to me. "I had to tell you those feelings just in case I actually died sometime. But now I'm scared if you reject me because of the whole kidnapping thing when we first met and usually I would be okay with rejection but I don't feel usual with you." He rambled and his hands made several confusing gestures along the way.

Everything about him told me he was being truthful. His hands were trembling with nervousness, He literally came from a hospital to tell me this and he just had that look on his face.

The feelings from the other day came rushing back. I really enjoyed being with genuine Adrian. The time we spent together over the course of this project was enjoyable. I noticed small things about him like the way he always made sure to keep an eye on me and was careful not to get me into anything super dangerous. He had become almost like a personal guard.

He even taught me how to use weapons, and also never overstepped my boundaries. So yeah maybe I developed a crush on my kidnapper co-worker.

"Why are you looking at me like that I'm like really nervous right now." He asked.

"Because I feel the same way. Even though you did totally kidnap and traumatize me." I nudged him smiling but he didn't return it. "Adrian I was playing with you. But I really do feel the same way." He let out a long breath. I was quite sure he had stopped breathing for a little while.

"Oh thank god." Adrian stepped closer and picked me up in his arms as he kissed me deeply. I've kissed a couple of times in the past but never did it feel as amazing as this. I held him close to me as if he would slip away again. He pulled away to look closely at my face.

"Just because you kissed me doesn't mean I won't scold you for almost dying." I glared at him but he just smiled kindly and kissed me again.

"If I keep. Kissing you then. I won't. Get yelled at." He said in between kisses making me start to laugh.

“Don’t scare me like that again Chase.” I shook my head kissing him passionately once more. I could get used to this feeling.

#adrian chase #adrian chase x y/n #adrian chase fanfic #vigilante #vigilante x you #freddie stroma #freddie stroma x reader #in such a vigilante brain rot again please help #adrian chase x reader #soft angst #fluff

[yfere]

Going to obsess over Husk and Alastor for a second

ok. ok. OK. so. more on why alastor and husk's dynamic makes my head spin. is because, on paper, I have. NO idea,,, how they work??? they have the absolute most clashing personalities I have ever seen, and yet alastor chose husk and continues to choose him as a confidant and a co-conspirator and workhorse, even though he has much more obviously like-minded people around him in Rosie, Mimzy, and Niffty. And Husk -- I'm a little more forgiving on Husk's end because a) he has zero choice in his involvement here and b) he's kind of a bleeding heart himself, so I can kind of understand the moments where he looks out for Alastor or shows care outside of the bounds of his contract. But still. I look at them, and I'm just... why????? I'm so intrigued by it.

Because.... listen. What I understand about Husk is this. That he's a very compassionate person at heart, and cares about other people, even though he tries desperately not to. Hell, from the way he acts he seems like more of a true believer in Charlie's ideas for redemption than even Vaggie at times. He has a high degree of empathy and can easily see through people's bullshit (probably part of what makes him a terror at cards). I think at core he's a very sincere person, and this is part of why it is absolutely not in his nature to sugarcoat things, or refrain from speaking his mind. Husk is also a person who demands two things from the people around him - one is to treat him and his boundaries with respect, and this is why he snaps so much at Angel to begin with, and also what made him so furious with Alastor in episode 5. The second thing that Husk demands is honesty and vulnerability from the people around him, and he's openly disdainful of "fake" people. He tells Angel outright that he would treat him better if he were "real" -- his respect and affection for Angel was contingent to an extent on Angel being willing to drop his mask.

So you take this person, and stick him with Alastor, the fakest of fake motherfuckers in Hell, who can't stand the concept of being vulnerable and whose basic operating philosophy is "wear a mask smile so that you can hide your true feelings and always seem in control." Alastor, a person who is so desperately hungry for respect and power that he goes ballistic over what he sees as disrespect (even if it's just plain honesty), who pathologically needs the upper hand, who is casually and constantly disrespectful, who showboats relentlessly, who spits out one liners and strikes a pose even when he's a hair's breadth from death and fleeing the scene. THIS guy.

...who hand selected as one of his closest companions a person whose philosophy and personality is diametrically opposed to his own. I think... that says something about alastor, though it's hard to say what exactly that is, yet. maybe he likes watching husk "I lost the ability to love years ago sike I'm falling in love again" care and then suffer for caring and start the cycle all over again, similarly to how he said that he wanted to watch charlie try her hardest with the hotel and fail. on the other hand, as much as Alastor tries to stay aloof from the hotel's residents (not him looking over them all from a proverbial theater box in episode 8 as they prepare to face execution day), I don't think he's lying about his affection for them. maybe there's a small part of him that's looking to be surprised, or even proven wrong. maybe he thinks he'll be happy either way, and that's part of why he doesn't act the saboteur. or maybe there's even another element to it... alastor doesn't only court respect and fear, he courts adoration, and deliberately looks for and soaks up the affection thrown his way by charlie and the rest. maybe alastor is attracted to people who can't help but genuinely care for him, even against their better judgment.

#and I guess husk DOES like magic and showboating so maybe alastor has what... one good point in his favor? the mind boggles #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel spoilers #alastor #husk #I think maybe alastor and husk's relationship is like a microcosm of alastor's relationship to the hotel at large #certainly husk seems more closely aligned with the hotel itself than with alastor #ahem. anyway

[tres-fidelis]

Fear

Mask

Midnight

I forgot which one I'm interacting with so why not all three? ; 3

oc asks: not-so-nice edition

fear: What is your OC's greatest fear? What do they do when confronted with it? Are they open with their fear, or do they hide it away?

((She's very afraid of speaking out. The times she's ever tried standing her own ground by voicing her opinions, she's been shot down by her parents intervening and speaking for her. If she disagrees with a choice made by her parents, they reassure her its the best choice for KC's interests. If she pursues the topic or decision further, she's told to keep quiet and not make a scene. She's had very little moments where she could freely speak about what's on her mind, how she feels about a situation or problem, or even saying what kinds of food she prefers eating.

This is what initially turned her away from speaking at all, and why she has selective mutism now in her teenage years. At this point, KC wonders if she even has a physical voice anymore. She's too nervous and scared to find out on her own.))

mask: Does your OC wear a mask, literally or figuratively? What goes on beneath it? Is there anyone in their life who gets to see who they are under the mask?

((Jayden has to, everyday. She has one to wear around her co-workers, she has to put one on when she's working with other news companies, and of course she needs to wear one when she's reporting live in front of the cameras. There's too many she needs to juggle all in a single day, but she's learned well how to keep the act going. It's been like that for years now. She's built a craft out of it. It's been practiced enough where switching between her masks doesn't make her feel much of anything.

But it's tiring, and she knows it too well. Appearances and pleasantries, however, are necessary in her career field. When you're a well-known face to thousands of people, all of them looking at you and waiting to hear what you have to say, you need to please them. They don't want to hear the truth. They want to know what's best for them. Yet despite knowing this, Jayden always tries her best to speak the real truth. No lies, no cover-ups, but she knows she has to say whatever nonsense will rake in the ratings.

It's a mess, and Jayden knows it too well. But she continues to strive towards bettering her workplace, and keeping the viewers informed about local news stories. None one really knows the true, broken, damaged Jayden other than her mother, though. Jayden's mom is the only person who knows the real Jayden.))

midnight: What keeps your OC up at night? Do they have nightmares? Fears? Anxieties? What do they do in the small hours of the morning when they should be sleeping?

((Most nightmares Rin has involves her parents and the night of the car crash. They're reoccurring at this point, she almost expects to have those dreams again whenever she sleeps. Then again, Rin doesn't get sleep too much to begin with. Most nights she's out driving around the Inaba mountainside, winding down curved roadways and racing against any out-of-town racing groups.

That's her usual nights, and they last sometimes until early morning. She doesn't care too much about getting enough sleep if it means more time driving in her racing car. The asphalt is a comfort for her, in an ironic and twisted sense. When she's flying down the road, the adrenaline gets rid of all those anxieties or fears that plague her during the day. Behind the wheel, she doesn't need to think about any of that. It's just her, her car, the street, and nothing else.))

#ic #KC #Jayden #Rin #rubbarband #P4 Verse - Follow the Music #P5R Verse - What Lies Beneath Shibuya #P4 Verse - Inaba's Star Driver #((made one for each of the prompts #thanks for sending in!))

[hamsolo]

🌓

(note: Star Wars and any recognizable characters/ settings/ ideas do NOT belong to me.)

This is the next part of your story, Ryan! part one two

Also, please let me know if you wanted a different story.

send me an emoji and I’ll write you as a SW character

"Stop doing that! You're going to blow our cover." Halle tries to slap my hand away from my collar.

"Not my fault that this collar is tight and itchy...as if I needed another reason to dislike senators," I grumbled. "What exactly was the matter with the clothes I did have?" I grumbled under my breath.

"Well...for starters, everything you have is a version of what you're wearing in your wanted poster. And since you didn't want me to give you a haircut-."

"You and sharp objects near my head and neck don't seem like a good idea. I've seen you on jobs..."

"Thank you."

"But I didn't-."

"Oh, you did." She smiles and for a split second, it's all I can do. Just looking at her. Maybe even for the first time. Openly. Without screaming on frowning at each other.

And the strangest part? She's smiling back. Suddenly it feels like a porg is hopping in the pit of my stomach. Maybe it isn't so bad to be the "married" senators...I open my mouth to compliment her gown.

"Y'know-."

"Hello senators." A tall Pantorian strolls up, or rather... stumbles up. With the slender glass in his hand it's easy to see why. Wine and lots of it. With the ball on Zeltron it's no surprise. "Having a good time?" He looks from me to Halle's chest.

"Yes sir. What about you, Senator Braxion?"

He grins, waves his hands about and goes on about the latest bill running through the Imperial Senate and the stress it's putting him under. Bingo!

"The blasted Imperials...blockades...do you know how hard it is to...money without....Oh dear! I'm getting ahead of myself hic-!"

"Blockades?"

"Oh yessss, dear...those Imperials. Oh I shouldn't even be...s-saying this but they have their noses in...things."

"Noses in what?" Halle continues.

"The blasted bill...too much stress...and the blockade." After a few more minutes of talking in circles, I lead Halle away from him. The Pantorian may be harmless, but he's just a useless.

The next senator a female Human representing some Outer Rim world actually reveals herself to be the sub-senator who knows nothing.

The official after her, seems to know about the blockade but passes out in a heap beside the buffet table.

"Oh my."

"I know, tell me about it. This has been a waste of time. The only good thing is that no one has looked too, too closely at us."

"Shhh, not so loud!"

"Oh come off it, everyone is too busy having a good time."

"Not everyone." She nods towards a tall, older Human Senator. "He's looked over at us a couple times."

"Coincidence."

"I dunno..."

---------------------------

The tall, arched doorways leading out to the patio let in a gentle breeze enough to counteract the stuffy air of the ballroom. Halle and I hide out behind a tall potted plant.

We can scan the room and breathe easy. Or easier, at least.

Or so we thought.

"Told you so..." Halle whispers in a sing song voice.

"I didn't expect to see you two here..." A tall, older senator stalks up to us. The tall, older senator! He has Imperial written all over him. The both of us realizes this and once again. Halle slips into her mask.

"How do you do? I don't think we've officially met. i'm Iella Logarth and this is my husband, Gav." She holds out her hand.

I follow suit, "we represent Christophsis."

"Iorio Myron, from Chandrila" he answers crisply. "I thought that I heard that the two of you regretfully declined..."

I looked at Halle and she at me. Giggling nervously she takes a sip of her drink and I smile. At least... I hope it's a smile for all I know it's a grimace. "Well, Iella and decided to come anyway. You know those Zeltrons. They know how to throw a party."

"Yet you two are by the patio away from the party..."

"Gav needed some air. Too much to drink." Halle supplies.

"Right...so I suppose your cousin is feeling better, Senator, hmmm? I heard from the Coreillian senator that she was in bad health." He looks me square in the face. The porg in my stomach has now morphed into a rock that sunk to my gut. Cousin? We didn't even consider why the two senators weren't attending.

"Oh yes, she's fine Senator Myron." I feel the sweat already starting percolate at the nape of my neck. "Tip top shape. Heh." Halle reaches over and squeezes my hand.

"I guess she wouldn't be in immediate danger in a medical facility bed..." His lips curl, he's got us.

Quick, quick Ryin! Now would be a great time for quick thinking!

Halle jumps in, "well, we've visited her so much the last few weeks the medical center all but barred us. Shame really, we're absolutely saddened by it all.

I've barely nodded before another slimey smile appears on his face. "But she's not in any medical center, in fact she's at home living out her last days with her family." The smile widens and the rock has sunk lower.

"Her family which includes cousin Gav and his lovely wife, Iella by her side." A pair of stormtroopers appear at the end of the patio. "Now I'm going to ask you once, who are you?" Click.

I gulp and look down at an impressive looking blaster.

"Be careful of how you answer that, Rebel. For you know there is a whole ballroom of people behind you. One false move and panic ensues..."

I look a Halle and she looks a me and then, quickly back to Myron. She mouthing a countdown.

Three.

Two.

One. "Now!"

Using the element of surprise and not know what else to do, I launch myself at Myron, knocking him down like a sack of protatoes. Unfortunately for us, shot rang off and, of course, panic ensued.

Soon every senator, their aides, sub senators, guards, staff and any other being had blasters drawn or grabbed something use as a utensil and was flailing about wildly.

"Ry, c'mon!" I heard her rather than saw Halle. So much dust and dirt from the potted plant had been kicked up. Following her voice, I stumbled around until her hand closed around my fingers.

------------------------

My stomach started fluttering again and my breathing was coming out ragged as we dashed off the patio and onto the beach where the ship was waiting.

Myrrk was standing on the ramp. He took one look at our rumpled clothes and a sly smile appeared. "Well kids, I told you not to have too much fun-"

"Can it, would ya we've got to get out of here! Stormtroopers on our tail!"

Okay, okay. Hop on!" And then calling down the hall towards the cockpit, "I5-1B fire up the engines!"

#star wars #star wars stories #sw stories

[instantcloudengineer]

'The Creature'

part ||

EJ present headcanons:

Bloggers note✍:

I tried to make a more in depth analyse of mine version of EJ about who he is now.

⚠️Please keep in mind that i'm writing this only for entertainment, and don't mean to be disrespctfull. All credits to the rightfull creators of EJ. And also please keep in mind that english is not mine first language so i'm sorry for any grammatical mistakes.⚠️

⚠️TW: mention of canibalism, Black Market and manipulation.⚠️

•Now with that out of the way let's get into it...

• As I mentioned in mine first headcanons Jack has two forms the demon form and human form, however his human form is only for an certain amount of time. The reason why he has two forms is beacause something went horibly wrong during his possesion that led to the abomination of a being with two 'minds'.

•Even though he has a human form he usually stays in his demon form because it's easier for him that way. But when he does change into his human form he goes to university wich led him to be a third year general surgery residency student. He goes to university for two days and the rest of the week he studies from home and follows online classes. If he's not studying he works like a surgeon in training, or he is finding a new victim if not that he is doing things he enjoyed like working out or watching Netflix.

♤Living situation, relationships and income:♤

•Most days he lives and stays in his appartement. But he also has a cabin in the woods where he always brings his victims to despose of their body and cut out their organs, some of the organs he eats himslef and other organs he sales on the blackmarket wich led him to have a pretty good amount of money.He also uses his cabin as a hide out.

•He lives somewhere in America where his apartament and cabin is. Although he did inherit a pretty big vacation cabin in the slavic forest, he doens't go there often. But he does use it as a emergency hide out, or just for vacation if he finds the time for it.

•All of his places are highly secured. Beacause of his intrest in the Black Market and real identity.

•He also makes pretty good amount of money through his trainings.

•Jack also still has contact with his family and friends he deems usefull.

•But even though he has important connections. He still likes to have a companion so he got himself a German Shepherd called Demitrius.

♤But a demon can only stay normal for so long...♤

•Even though he has contact with his 'loved' ones he still will and is messing with their heads. Like keeping them attached to him even though they sometimes like to leave. Jack has the habit to dissapear for long amounts of time wich leads them to feel like their relationships with him are not worth it anymore, and everytime they try to leave he manipulates them into staying even though he realy could care less about them.

•He doesn't want to hurt them, and that's not because he cares and loves them but because they are usefull 'tools' to him.

•Sometimes he uses the people who he realy dislikes as his 'experiments' For new vaccin or just testing out for some 'diseases' he tried to make himself.

•He makes those 'diseases' to use on people he deems wrong doers. It's mostly people he meets and sees in the blackmarket. Jack has his own opinions on 'wrong' and 'right'.

♤Demon and Human form:♤

•He is mostly a demon during the night. But his human form is only around 8 to 10 hours before he starts craving blood,flesh and organs. But if he still needs to finish a shift or school day he knows how to keep his cravings under control but after this he will probably end up going on a killing spree.

•The annoying thing to Jack is that he doesn't see his demon or human form coming,it's mostly unpredictable. But he can control it a little bit.

•If he is in the hospital he will put on his mask so co-workers won't get alarmed.If people ask questions he will manipulate their minds into thinking it's normal that Jack is wearing a mask.

•I mentioned before that Jack's demon form is between 6'8 and 7 feet tall that's between 203 to 213 cm, gray skin, empty black socets, black claws and dark brownish black hair.

•So let's now talk more about his human form:

• he is still tall around 6'5 that's 195 cm. He has dark brown hair and dark blue eyes, he is also fairly musculer.

•Jack is known in his work environment and school as this confident, independent, a pretty good leader, hard working, calm, patient, wise, gentle and a good hearted doctor, co-worker and student. Basicly the perfect picture. Even though it's mostly far from the real truth...

•For his family and friends is he known to be mostly honest, loyal, patient, calm, independent, hard working and sometimes reliable. But he is also known to be manipulative, selfish and cold hearted, sometimes cruel and also sometimes a liar when it comes to his where abouts.

♤Black Market:♤

•As I mentioned before Jack sells mostly organs. He usealy sells them to cults who need the organs for their rituals, even though he is not their biggest fan, but they still are good money.He also sells organs to other cannibals.

•Jack likes to build wealth through his intrests.

•On the black market he is known as this "business mind" who likes to go straigh to the point, He is also known as this charmer even though it's just manipulation to get a deal.

•But he is pretty well known on the Black Market mostly as a good and succesfull co-worker that's why he is mostly invinted to big parties in the hope that he will work with them. But he usealy declines all the offers beacause he just finds it pathetic that people party around, drink around and fuck around. However if he does go he tries to get a good deal and just leaves, he hates parties not because he is introverted but because he finds the people there just pathetic and stupid low lifes. But he has three powerfull co-workers who he helps out and they help him out...

So this where mine second headcanons of EJ I hope you enjoyed them, there will be more headcanons in the future.

Have a nice day or night and take care.

~💋

#creepypasta headcanon #creepypasta #creepypasta hcs #eyeless jack #eyeless jack headcanons #creepypasta fictive #fanfiction #creep #creepypasta fandom #creepypasta fanfiction #creepypasta imagines

[mugunghwc]

unprompted ask / always accepting

@badheart said: Jiro smiled at her, seemingly awaiting for Rei to tell about her day, which hopefully offered a pleasant and very pink surprise for her at work.

upon leaving the office, she could be spotted talking with some of her co-workers, who appeared amused by something—gossiping amongst themselves as they walked until rei spotted jiro waiting for her in his car. a timid smile would spread across her lips before she turned on her heel & waved them goodbye. rei wasted no time & approached him with eager steps ; opening the passenger's door & taking seat. her back fully leaning against it while she seemingly tried to maintain her composure. "i'm glad you could come." she admitted, as she did not expect him to always be available to pick her up. her seatbelt was buckled after placing her purse to the side, turning her head towards him to ask about his day when he asked about hers—completely cutting her off.

"kind of unbelievable" rei admitted, while still wearing that same smile on her lips. "i know you don't like me talking about my superior, but... it has to do with him." her exhilaration was barely contained in her voice, as if she was still riding some sort of ' high '. her expression still showed some disbelief about the whole thing. "he came in furious, & took it out on us... or well, tried to." for once, it was difficult taking it to heart given the circumstances, which led to a few moments in which she had to mask the curl of her lips with the back of her hand. "apparently, he had a hair appointment today, & something must've happened that it turned out a different colour." a neon bright pink that was hard to wash off. he had tried, by the sound of it. "he ended up demanding for a cap to hide his hair since today we were going to sign in the contract with our american investors." a big day for all of them, & rather than experiencing joy, he was left beyond frustrated over his misfortune.

"luckily, the investors took it with humour & signed regardless, which we were thankful for... you have no idea how tedious it has been working with them." especially, in the way that idachi handled it. the man had zero charm or tactfulness, which meant re-wording most of the things he said. "he had to force a smile on his face when they got their picture taken." something to commemorate this day. the entire time, she had difficulty suppressing her laugher, which she let out now while thinking back on it.

"you should've seen it... bright pink hair." her cheeks flushed a similar shade from the euphoria she experienced over finally getting a laugh at his expense. no one wanted to deal with his bad attitude, but today was worth it. "i had a hard time keeping a straight face."

#badheart #.ic / way too many people tryna take the crown #.ask / never have any regrets after the game #verse 01. theory of beauty / main #he definitely popped a vein or two

[freya-rat-face]

Maybe ten years ago, I found out that a good ninety precent of the things that make me "weird" in casual society are actually just autistic traits. Huge revelation. But I'm still pretty fucking weird to most people.

I suck at pretending to be normal. I can't mask worth a shit, and I assumed since early childhood that everyone had masks (I even called them that) they wore for everyone else so the little bits that make them weird can't be seen.

I insist even now that people wear masks, just not the kind specifically for hiding neurotypes. You hear about it sometimes from allistic/NT people, it's all over the place in entertainment media-- you have to maintain your image. No farting on the first date, anxiety to even take too long in the bathroom. Can't be seen without makeup, can't be seen in a place like this, must be seen in a place like this. There are fucking publicists whose fucking jobs are to create exactly that. Don't tell me it doesn't count just cos they're not holding back infodumping. It's different, but I was gaslighted WAY too long with "everyone has those problems". For whatever reason, whoever they're presenting to, literally everyone is pretending at least a little. Even just for themselves.

But anyway-- I tried for a long time, then gave up, then tried some more, and eventually I took on a very David Attenborough attitude of observing my peers. "See the homo sapiens adolescents practicing their mating rituals. Only a few will gain a mate in this process, but for most, it is a vital learning exercise." (You'll be unsurprised to find out I didn't date until I was nineteen.)

And this translates pretty directly into writing. In the worldbuilding groups, it was quickly obvious that the lot of us are ND and most of us are in the hobby specifically because of how we've taken to observing the world and trying to figure out why the fuck people are Like That.

It also goes into character building. And I've finally figured out why one of the things that makes my characters the way they are is also one of the things that's socially unacceptable. (Or maybe vice versa, I'm not sure what order this is going in.)

Loads of people dislike that thing where I see all the little bits that make them special, because it makes them feel exposed and too much on display. Intrusive, is a word I've been called to my direct knowledge. (I'm not great at non-explicit communication and only learned in my mid twenties to let people know I need to be told to fuck off.)

I never understood it, and I came around to it when I was talking to the Cat.

They're trying to blend in, dammit, trying to fit in and not get kicked out of the in-group, whatever group that may be. Of course picking out what makes them an individual makes them uncomfortable.

Those little special things are what brings the characters to life, though. Eupa's anxiety and cleaning tic, Brotz's fluster with forward women, Daemon's tail tapping the floor when he's impatient.

Funny how I wouldn't notice that one, but I suppose all my characters are a living out-group and can't feel rejected from their community like that.

(Brotz did for a while, Eupa finally came around and helped him settle.)

[glossytoji]

End Game (Katakuri x F!Reader, college AU)

Themes (& warnings): Reader consistently pursues/courts Katakuri. A bit of angst(?). Romance.

5290 words

Main masterlist|part 2-Katakuri's POV

The whisperings in the halls are getting louder every second. At this point, they are not even trying to hide the fact that they are talking about Y/n. It has been months since Y/n has practically announced her affection towards the burly man; and by this time, the whole university must have caught grasp of the situation— some didn't care about the situation yet the incident has called on their attention since it's the Charlotte Katakuri involved. Among the whispers in University's hallway, Y/n caught wind on what they have to say;

"She's too shameless."

"She should wake-up from her delusions."

"She deserves someone better."

"She's too desperate."

"I am honestly getting embarrassed for her."

"This is just so embarassing—"

"Oi!" (Friend's name), Y/n's friend nudged and interrupted her from her intent listening of the gossips.

"Hey, don't mind them—"

"They're right. I should stop." Y/n interrupted, at this point, her friends' attempt for comfort are pointless. From the get-go, she shouldn't have taken her crush for Katakuri so seriously. Afterall, the man's even rejected the most beautiful woman to have ever prance around campus. He rejected every woman who has ever tried to go close to him. Typically, when Katakuri rejects a woman, they would either cry and immediately turn their backs on him but surprisingly for Y/n, that's not the case, every time he would ignore her, a glimmer would spread through out her face, as if she's actually honored to have him turn his back on her? That was the case a few months ago. Right now, the tides have changed. Katakuri is always a handsome man. The first time she met him was when they were paired for a university assignment for a prerequisite subject, for a single semester. He was kind and accommodating. She spent most of her time with him working on the case study on cafe's and in his wealthy apartment— afterall he is the son of a business tycoon, Charlotte Linlin. Everybody was jealous of her, she didn't understand at first how everyone is so attracted at the male until she got a taste of his kindness as well. He was thoughtful, strong, intelligent, and even intimidating— which made her saw him as someone who is very hot and sexy. She personally thinks that it's not a common occurrence, that someone who is a university jock, a star player on their University's soccer team, a muscular, hot, and handsome fellow could be kind, thoughtful, and very intelligent at the same time— no offense to the other jocks. What's unusual for Y/n is how he maintains to wear a scarf around his neck, her throat would often gulp when she caught glimpse of the brand. Everybody has seen his face probably once in their life, yet even when he plays soccer he keeps his scarf up or when he's not, he'd wear a mask.

Beneath his scarf, he covers his mouth where on the right end extending below his right cheek is a scar, barely visible if you squint— since he has acquired the injury since he was a kid— yet still there. Everybody knew it was an injury yet no one knew the cause. Nevertheless, they would still swoon over him but of course he would never understand that, he always thought they were in it for the money. No amount of self-confidence could recover his esteem when his very own mother would look at his uncovered mouth in disgust. Charlotte Linlin, was a great businesswoman yet a very awful mother to Katakuri. Katakuri does not only hold the burden of the Company's future but also the burden of being "the perfect son" and "the perfect brother". He didn't have time for relationships which would obviously—as per Katakuri— end up in tragedies, and probably a dent in his bank account.

Y/n was so sure he was getting close with the burly male who smelled good all the time. A few jokes and laughs were exchanged here and there, until he has loosen up his scarf and threw it at the couch on his apartment. He didn't realize that he purposely did so for a while now yet what made him feel aggravated was when she was intently staring. The incident happened the night before they had to turn in their paper. Right after they have submitted their paper, he returned to ignoring her. And what's worse he became rather cold than civil.

It was probably when Katakuri mistook her stare of adoration as disgust. Y/n didn't know what went wrong but she knew she would never want to lose someone like Katakuri, most especially without knowing why. It has been months since she has actively pursued the man, slowly realizing along the process that she is absolutely whipped for Charlotte Katakuri. She's hopelessly in love with the man. At the first few weeks, everybody thought it was cute yet right now... they were embarrassed for her. It has been months for Christ's sake! Her friend's started to worry for her. She doesn't seem to be obsessed, she was not reinforcing to Katakuri as well. Y/n was optimistic at the very beginning of the courting process yet right now... it has been probably two months since she had heard gossips about her shameless courtship.

She couldn't waste her time. Most especially when Katakuri is rarely seen in the university considering he is only here for his Master's Degree and spends most of his free time on his mother's corporate. She wouldn't want to waste her time most especially that Katakuri is graduating this year. She wouldn't want to believe that her fate with Katakuri is meant to be passing only. The fact that she's still pursuing for her undergraduate course yet she still has the chance to work with Katakuri despite him being almost three years his senior— as a prerequisite on one of her major subjects— she believes it somehow meant something, even friendship. Her friends', out of worry only prayed for her to succeed.

Y/n sighed as she remained her eyes at the open field from the bleachers. She always hangs out at the bleachers whenever she felt like clearing her head, yet to categorize her current situation as luck or misfortune remains unknown; across the field, the university's soccer team has been working hard on the field. One of the players is none other than Charlotte Katakuri. Y/n buried her face to her palms as she groaned.

"God, I love him." She mumbled against her palms. To her right, resides the set of donuts that she bought from his favorite bakery. She planned on giving the donuts to him after his game, although she honestly didn't realize that today's a schedule for his soccer practice. Looking back at the field, she realized Katakuri might hesitate at accepting the donut since their team is currently on strict diet— well to be honest, he always does hesitate, with or without practice, and there are times that Y/n would eat the donuts alone at the bleachers.

It has been hell of months since she started to actively pursue the burly jock. She didn't want to keep count since she has went pass five months because she herself is sometimes embarrassed about it. But what she can all say is... it's all in the name of love. Always dreamy and lost in her optimistic imaginations that she somehow forgets that she's been chasing the same man for... almost a year. Already too deep on the grave that she's digging, for no one but herself. A smile shot up her face as Katakuri has managed to kick a goal. As if she's a proud girlfriend, she clapped her hands with no one to hear but herself. A gloomy look immediately plastered on her face as she realized what she came here for. It was bearable for the first few months, the way he leaves her on read. If she really thinks about it, not once did Katakuri bothered to reply to her ever since but somehow, the way he leaves her on read gives her relief, it means he still looks forward to her good morning and good night texts, to her texts which urged him to eat well and never miss a meal, to her texts which would remind him to double the comforters because a storm would be hitting the area, to her texts that would tell him that she had left him donuts or some other snacks on the soccer team's quarters. She was never as updated about the weather before Katakuri, but ever since her affection towards the man, she would always check on the weather and often remind him to check his breaks and to be careful on the road because news stated it's the slippery season.

A heavy and dark cloud loomed over her chest as she stared at her phone in her hand, her fingers hovering the block button on his phone number. Tonight, she's ending everything and would give him closure even if he never asked to, even if he never cared. Maybe it's the scorching heat or the post-winter blues—although it has been a few months since winter— Y/n is somehow feeling disheartened than ever. No growth or even development on their relationship, maybe everyone was right. Although she never really expected anything in return... although she was happy while she pursued him, the looks he gave her managed to drill a pain in her heart. Afterall, she was just a speck of dust in Katakuri's world. People would even gossip about Y/n being a mere fangirl; she has become a joke in the eyes of everybody. She would have pushed for more but in the name of self-respect, she's surrendering. It would probably be a huge relief to have her— who is in the pain in the ass of Katakuri— lost from his sight. The last message she sent was "can we talk?", her heart started to beat out her chest when she realized that Katakuri didn't even bother to read her message. He's tired and luckily for him. She's giving up. Although Y/n was so sure that if ever times and situations were different, she would truly take care of him in the best of her abilities.

The sun is setting very low, and soon enough, evening took over. Practice was still on going. She was contemplating to leave the donuts at the lower bench for him to see but she decided to just wait for him. The idea of ghosting him crossed her mind but she knew she couldn't do that to Katakuri, even though he won't surely care about what she'll do— whether she leaves the country or get off the grid.

An irresistible ache continued to hover on her chest. She couldn't believe she's finally doing this. Her mind was set and she prayed to the heavens nothing would convince her out; although her resolve is very weak, she's still going to push through. Maybe the love she allocated for Katakuri is not actually for Katakuri, maybe somewhere out there her soulmate is actually watching Netflix or playing soccer—

She shook her head, as all the reasons she starts to come up would always circle back to Katakuri. How can she be so in love with someone who does not even care to give her a glance? And even if he did, it's one laced with annoyance or disgust. She cared so much for someone who she never even as much held hands with— with someone who is always as close as hairs' length yet still never managed to seal. There were tons of almost-instances in her life, yet it's never enough. She inhaled air to her cheeks and never exhaled, her cheeks seeming to resemble a pufferfish— trying her best to not bat an eyelash as tears would fall down her face. This is her, trying not to cry.

She realized that the soccer practice has concluded. She fixed her backpack through her shoulders with her right hand on the box of donuts. Everybody was heading home yet Katakuri could not be seen. She immediately descends from the bleachers, having met some of the freshly showered players as she planned to head towards where he typically parks his big bike. And there he is. Suddenly, a few steps ahead from her.

"Katakuri!" She exclaimed, slowly jogging to catch up with his long strides. He didn't even bother to slow down for her sake.

"Donuts?" She asked, as she forced to swallow the lump on her throat. With every step they make, a new burden seemed to lay upon her chest. He remained to ignore her. As if she's a ghost who had not rest in peace.

"K-katakuri. I have to tell you something." She spoke while she panted, afterall, she is not as athletic as Katakuri. He continued walking in the open space towards the parking lot. Having enough of his behavior, she hopped in front of his form and blocked his way, extending her arms wide to further emphasize her point.

"Katakuri, please listen to me just this once. Just for the last time. I won't bother you after anymore." She said as her breathing got deeper. She contemplated whether to harshly shove the donuts at his chest yet she didn't. She realized Katakuri stopped on his tracks as he stared down at her form, afterall he's six foot five, she's smaller compared to him. She gently shoved the donuts at his chests and when his hands did not bother to accept, she immediately dropped it which made him extend a palm out of reflex.

"Katakuri, why do you always ignore me? Why not reject me?" She asked, gulping at her question, her heart tripled in speed. Although the latter seemed like a stupid question, since him ignoring her is probably a sign of his rejection. She realized that Katakuri has not covered his mouth at all. She wanted to extend her hand, and caress his scar but instead she clenched her fists. As Katakuri began to move forward, she blocked her hands to his chest.

"No, listen—You know how I feel about you!" She croaked, biting the insides of her cheeks right after to stop herself from crying.

"O-or is this about our gap? Wait— is it because of our social standing?" Y/n spoke, referring to their social standing. While Y/n was considered rich from where she came from, she is nothing compared to Katakuri. Katakuri's brows furrowed in confusion. Y/n gulped as she realized what she said, she has crossed the line for the sake of entertaining her delusions.

"I-I-m sorry... I didn't mean to imply that you're... a-and I get it. You don't like me for me. There's no need for extravagant reasons." She immediately apologetically added.

"I care so much about you, Katakuri." She added, sounding defeated.

"I have more to say but— whenever you feel sad. I hope the thought of me would somehow make you laugh. Whenever you feel uncared for, I hope you remember that it's not true— because I always do care for you. A-and— I'm sorry for ever wasting your time but I still think you're the coolest person ever. You shine bright and I lov—"

"Oi, Katakuri ni-san!" A gruff voice, interrupted her confession. She was confused whether to be relieved or annoyed. Katakuri remained silent as footsteps coming from two people from behind Y/n approached— spanning around ten meters away from them. It's probably Katakuri's triplet-siblings.

"So— uh... this is goodbye. And please be happy in whatever choice you make, eat well..." Y/n awkwardly and hurriedly spoke as his brothers seemed to be fast-approaching. Was that it? Was that how she was supposed to say goodbye? She was just about to be more dramatic. Nevertheless, she rushed and and dashed out of the campus, her breath harsh against her chest as she didn't stop running until she reached another block.

"Fuck off." Katakuri hissed at his brothers while he massaged his temples.

"Hey, that's rude!" Oven immediately raised his hands up in surrender, surprised by his unprovoked anger. He was always calm... what could have happened.

"Was that Y/n again? Damn, it must have been annoying for you brother—"

"Just shut the fuck up." Katakuri harshly hissed, interrupting Daifuku as he jogged towards his big bike, leaving his brothers behind. With the donuts in his hand, he immediately retraced his steps as he shoved it at Daifuku's chest.

"That's mine." He warned as he jolted the bike to life, hoping that Y/n was just around the corner.

"Fuck shit." He muttered in his breath.

While Y/n was about to recover from her harsh pants, she groaned as she heard the familiar grumble driving towards the street she is in, forcing her exhausted legs to push towards the nearest alley to hide. Although chances that Katakuri would merely pass her when he drives by, she honestly thinks that seeing Katakuri is just so embarrassing for her. She immediately glanced at the watch on her wrist and realized that it's already seven in the evening. A squeaking noise from the huge trash bin beside her made her squeal and jolt which urged her to settle across the café, afterall, she deserves a smoothie at her boldness.

The door to the café rang as she enters. She rolled her eyes as she realized that this was the café where she first met with Katakuri— to prepare for their case study.

As she waits for her order, she haven't realize that a familiar purr of the big bike parking outside. A soft bell rang from the cafe's entrance, indicating a new customer. She didn't give as much as a glance to whomever entered but when a familiar gruff voice chimed saying "Iced Americano".

Her heart doubled in speed, she coughed as she felt her breath stutter in her airways.

"Let's talk." Katakuri, who is now standing behind her, said.

She slowly glanced at Katakuri's form that's now headed towards a secluded space in the café. Y/n gulped immediately placing cash on the counter and whispering "you can have it"  to the bartender, as she planned to leave the café secretly.

"Miss! Your (favorite smoothie)!" The old man behind the bar exclaimed which caught Katakuri's attention, Katakuri immediately followed suit, placing cash in the counter as he realized she's running away again. For tonight, the tables have turned.

Y/n hissed as she heard the old man call for her, and before she could move an inch further away from the cafe. A tight grip has managed to land on her left wrist.

"Y/n." Katakuri's deep voice managed to ignite the butterflies she planned to bury.

"Hmm? What's the matter?" Y/n asked as if she does not care, slowly turning to face him while his grip remained unrelenting.

"Let's talk." He firmly spoke.

"O-okay." She gave in. Katakuri never made requests from her, so to grant him this for the last time, she didn't mind.

Katakuri led the way to his bike and Y/n wordlessly followed suit while glancing around the environment, making sure that no one familiar has seen.

They are at an empty park that seemed to be abandoned at night— where some of the random couples would shamelessly have sex— the duo remained silent. Katakuri's eyes remained on the ground, and so does Y/n's as they've sat side by side at an empty bench.

"Do you really want to be with me?" Katakuri asked, finally interrupting the booming silence. His gaze remained distant.

"I-I'm setting you free... that's what you want right?" She gently asked. Caught off guard at his question.

"Do you really want to be with me?" Katakuri asked, for the second time.

"I-I mean there's nothing to set free since you were never mine to begin with." She said, confused at where their conversation is going. Unbeknownst to her, to her right, Katakuri continued to stare at her side profile. She then glanced to her left, as she studied the dimly lit park.

"Katakuri I—" as she faced him to continue talking, lips interrupted her. Her eyes became wide open due to shock... did Katakuri just kissed her? Huh? What is going on? She swear she's going to have whiplash at the sudden and unexpected turn of events.

"What was that?" She gasped. Katakuri remained silent, still not knowing the right words to say.

"Do you really want to be with me?" He asked. Was she supposed to say yes? Well she wanted to but she is so confused about the current situation at hand.

"I did not pursue you for months long just for nothing Katakuri." She firmly said, as she felt slightly and suddenly annoyed by his behavior. Is he playing with her right now?

"What's going on Katakuri?" She gently asked, amidst the harsh emotions. Her heart tripled in speed, as she pushed herself from the bench and stood in front of Katakuri.

"You ignored me for months and... you suddenly kiss me? As if that's the normal between us?" She interrogated, her voice remained gentle yet quivering. A torn expression evident on her face. She refused to believe that she's not dreaming. Yesterday, all she ever hoped for was for him to suddenly sweep her off her feet and kiss her but why does it have to happen now? When she's about to let go?

"I'm sorry." He mumbled.

"You're sorry? Who would take someone almost a year to realize they were sorry Katakuri? Are you p-playing with me right now?" She trembled, the strings of her heart remained bias towards Katakuri, even at her emotions, she remains defeated.

"Aren't you disgusted with me?" He asked, a pained expression suddenly on his face.

Disgusted? Y/n? Since when?

"Huh, why would I?" A confused expression replaced Y/n's pained ones. Katakuri was embarrassed, for a long time, he was deflecting his insecurities. Guilt and shame suddenly overcame his being but he didn't have time to hesitate, when he knew that he had always been hesitating when it comes to his happiness— not this time. It would probably take him a hundred summers to make it up to Y/n.

"Katakuri, not once were you ever disgusting for me." She expressed, although she didn't understand what he meant, she assured with her honest thoughts. Katakuri avoided her gaze, yet this time, Y/n inhaled and exhaled all her nervousness as she mustered the courage to cup his face. She gently then run her thumb at his scar, Katakuri flinched; Y/n realized what he probably meant. This scar must have meant so deep to him to ever think that way.

"Katakuri... I wish you could see what I have always seen. You're the most beautiful person that has ever walked in my lifetime and that won't ever change." Y/n gently spoke, a gentle smile on her face, as she lowered herself a bit to meet him eye to eye from his seated position. She was confused for a moment. He is truly beautiful, everyone around him thought so as well. Didn't he knew? Did no one ever told him? That he is beautiful and worthy of all the love and good things? She then decided to tell him what she truly felt because she knew it is what he truly need. The pain of being ignored was suddenly replaced by a different pain. It brought her so much pain to see Katakuri this way.

"You deserve all the good things in life. And all the love and I think... I have so much to give. I-I love you. As funny and  delusional as it sounds." She croaked a bit embarrassed at her love confession. She always finds herself around the corner whenever she noticed that Katakuri's day sucks. She would always notice the defeated and confused look on his face while the world was busy moving forward. She wanted to move closer but she didn't want to scare him, so instead, she sends him snacks and water whether he had practice or not, she sends him text messages— even when it's appearing as small talk, she atleast wanted to make him feel that she's with him.

"I feel the same way b-but do you really want to be with me?" He asked, this time with his mighty façade crumbling. Y/n finally knew what the question meant.

"I'm so sorry. I don't know what to do." He added, pained and lost as he always had his life planned by others for him.

"I'll make it up to you, I promise." He croaked, relieved that he got it out of his chest. The misunderstanding from months ago, the painful assumption that he made about her because of that night, was suddenly swept by the night's air and is replaced by something more meaningful. His resolve slowly crumbling as he asks himself, can I really lay myself bare before her?

"But I need your help..." he mumbles.

"With?" She encouraged.

"I don't know how this works." He asks as he gestured between the two of them.

"We will figure that out." She assured.

"I'll also let you know, that I want to be with you. For the next ten years, and for a lifetime." Katakuri boldly asked, as he is a busy man with plenty of dreams, he didn't have time for what ifs. He also knew that Y/n has many dreams up her slate and he would make sure to be with her in every step of the way.

"Is it so soon?" He worriedly asked. Fortunately for the both of them. Y/n's vision are always long term. It would have sounded like a proposal if anybody were to hear the both of them; but they both know what it means.

"And just you know, I'll never let you go. So please think about it because if you'll make a decision with me, I'll cling onto you." He added, insinuating that there's only an in and no outs. He didn't want to force her into anything that she's never sure about. Katakuri is always a man of his word, his family could surely attest on his behalf.

"I want to be with you Katakuri. For the next ten years, and for a lifetime." She assured. From his seated position, he immediately snaked his arms around her while she met him halfway and crashed her lips against his with a sense of urgency.

The next morning rolled by. Katakuri promised to pick her up from her apartment yet due to unforeseen events he offered to drive her home instead.

It's around five in the afternoon, thankfully, Y/n's schedule ends there. She giddily hopped out of the building with her friends trailing her from behind. Her friends couldn't help but notice that she's unusually brighter for someone who had to end something meaningful yesterday. She's also dressed very nicely than usual as well. In fact, she was practically glowing through out the whole day. Y/n was suddenly a giggling school girl, she remember of having to pinch herself first thing in the morning to make sure she wasn't dreaming last night. A text from Katakuri has served as evidence, she also made sure to take a candid photo of Katakuri when he drove her home just to prove her sane the next morning. She was giddy and excited since she haven't got a chance to meet him the whole day but only this afternoon. The University's campus was buzzed with students leaving and entering the campus. Her eyes glimmered as she eyed Katakuri, handsomely leaning in his big bike without his scarf around his neck. Everyone was surely gawking, most especially when the black shirt that he had on, clinged to him as if it's his second skin.

"Hii~!" She exclaimed in a jolly manner, a large distance away from him. All eyes were suddenly on her and in unison they groaned for the girl (even strangers who only caught the tale of their story), thinking that it's the same old cycle. Her friends' somehow looked worried... didn't she say she ended all the ties with him yesterday?

"Hey, excuse me." A random male university suddenly approached her, she realized he is a member of the skateboarding team and was classmates with him on some subjects.

"I don't mean to intrude and to be nosy but... It's best if you stop seeing him... if it makes you feel better, you're not the only person he had rejected. And also, I have a friend who actually likes to go out with you so how about that?" He suggested, as if to persuade and console  Y/n.

"Thanks for your concern but I'm happy with my boyfriend right now!" She exclaimed as she harshly pats his shoulder in excitement. The man continued to stare at her as if she has grown three heads, same goes with her friends.

"Um, Y/n—"

"Hold up." Y/n interrupted as she happily jogged towards Katakuri in her heeled boots. The majority remained to stare at her form nervously as she happily skipped towards the intimidating man. She immediately jumped on to his arms and nuzzled her head to the crook of his neck—inhaling his very calming scent—while he snakes his arms around through her waist, holding her tight close to him. Everybody gasped. What just happened? Her friends laughed from a distance in relief, while one of her friend started to dramatically wipe the tears from her eyes. What a relief. The supposedly one sided and tragic story has a happy ending.

"Hmmm, I missed you." She mumbled against his neck which made him chuckle and place a kiss against her forehead.

"Would you look at that." She comments then laughed as she took heed of the crowd's disbelief, the very same crowd who mocked her. She then waved at her friends which made her friends squeal lines of "oh my god!" and "please take care of our friend!".

As if to jab on the on-lookers, Katakuri softly gripped her chin then landed a soft and lingering kiss on her lips. The on-lookers then dispersed and continued their day— some with smiles in their faces and some remaining in the state of disbelief— yet her friends remained glued on where she left them. The squealing of her friends in the background has now started to embarrass her.

"I'm sorry about them. They're just very happy for me." She spoke as she leaned her head to his chest to hide her flushed face.

"I see..." he said, then attempted to wave at her friends which made them squeal once more.

"That's it." She hissed, as she planned to silence her friends.

"Hey love, let them be." He insisted as he held her elbow to stop her from storming off. Did he just call her, love? She swear that she's going to explode if Katakuri continues to be lovey with her. Will she ever get used to this? She realized that Katakuri was slightly laughing at her friends.

"Hey, who do you think you are waving like that? Jeon Jungkook?" She teased.

"Am I supposed to be jealous by that john— whatever." He mumbled.

"My place?" Katakuri asked, which made Y/n eagerly nod with a grin that Katakuri finds adorable.

As Katakuri revved the engine with her clinging on his back, some of the people in the campus sighed in relief at the turn of events. It was like witnessing a web drama of a one-sided love unfold before them but the angst arc is finally over.

"At last." One of her friends said. And almost in unison, the crowd muttered "at last" in their breaths.

#Charlotte Katakuri #katakuri x reader #katakuri imagine #charlotte katakuri x reader #one piece #one piece x reader #op katakuri #glossytoji.writings

[ssavanessa22]

Supermodel 2.0

@cmwocappreciationweek Tuesday: write a fic between 500-10,000 words with a POC coded as y/n (only writers of colour)

Paring: Spencer x curly-haired reader(POC)

Warnings: Fade to black type of thing, an insinuation of sex so like 16+

A/N: ahhhhh day two bitches, this is the most self-indulgent fic I have ever written in my life. I rewrote it so it’s much better so enjoy :)

Both their heads hit the pillows beneath them after they had finished, after months of pinning, worry and stolen glances all the push both of them needed was a couple of glasses of Rossi’s fancy wine and a push from Derek Morgan. Spencer turned his face to the side so he could further study her face, even though he’s seen the most intimate parts of her for the last couple of hours he still wanted to study the like speckles of amber that were etched in her brown eyes.

“That was amazing Y/n, I'm glad we got to finally do that” he said slowly tracing his finger around her lips

After months of looking from afar, being in bed with Spencer doesn't feel real; it feelt like a dream.

He was feeling too vulnerable being next to her, she was so open with him in this bubble of love and affection they had created, so he tried to use humour to light the overwhelming feeling of love he had.

"I'm glad we finally had time to do this to be honest cause I've been really horny for like the past 2 weeks"

"Jesus Spencer you didn't have to say that", she replied cakaling

"I'm sorry I'm sorry he said whilst laughing, hey"

"What Spence"

"Let's go shower"

"Uhhhh yeah yeah sure"

Lifting her legs off of the bed and began to walk to the bathroom, however, all the pent up soreness from her legs hit me like a truck as she staggered to get out of bed.

"shit Spence can you help me get to the bathroom" he looked at her confused at first not really understanding the reason why this whole type of thing was new to him

"Why would you need help going to the bathroom?" she looked at him gesturing to her hips and legs

"Spence I know you're a genius and everything but your lack of common sense amazes me all the time," she said whilst laughing.

"ohhhh yeah, yeah I'm sorry let me come help you"

He lifted her both of them giggling like school girls all the way into the bathroom and sat her gently on the toilet seat. He walked into the shower turning it on, letting the water get hot.

"Hey Y/n"

"yeah, Spence?"

"Can I wash your hair? I mean you don't have to say yes I mean you can just wear that thing what's it called again the thing you and tara where when you guys have sleepovers at Garcia's"

"do you mean a bonnet Spence"

"yeah a bonnet"

"I mean unless you have a whole day of cause washing my hair takes like the whole day to do so you don't have to worry about that", she dismissed him in a jokey manner

“Okay then if your whole hair routine takes the whole day it will take the whole day I don't mind, I mean I know we've only been dating for a few months and we only just slept with each other last night but you know you've washed my hair ad I wanna return the favour"

She was partly shocked but also not surprised at the same time spencer loves to learn especially when it's about the people he cares about

"yeah ok let me just comb out my hair and I’ll get in the shower okay"

"uhhh yeah yeah sure," he said trying to hide his excitement as much as possible but failing miserably

sitting on the toilet seat she undid her braids and used her tangle teezer to detangle the ends of her hair

"so when I researched about black hair read about different hair textures, now from looking at the different hair products in your bathroom like the Cantu apple cider co-wash, the protein hair masks, hair oils, Camille rose shampoo and edge control I would guess that you're a 4a/b. you probably struggle with your hair not being as healthy as you would probably want because we travel so much causing you not to have proper hair care. You like to rotate between having braids, faux locks and wigs. It makes your hair easier to take care of because our jobs are so demanding."

She was in utter shock. He had read her hair to filth but it was sweet, he did all this research for her and she didn't even ask him, she could already tell she was falling for him before but now with this, she was basically in love already.

as they both stepped into the shower she said "Spence you didn't have to do all of that I could have just told you if you asked"

"yeah I mean sure I could have asked but you probably always have people asking you and if I'm gonna be your boyfriend and you basically know everything about me already the bare minimum I can do is research on my own, and I love reading so it was no prob-"

She interrupted his speech by placing a sweet and tender kiss on his lips he was caught off guard at first but began to reciprocate the kiss, as he slowly started to trail his hands around my body deepening the kiss and pushing us both into the water as she snaked her arms around his neck tugging at the nape of his hair whilst biting his bottom lip. He started to dominate the kiss moving from my lips to my jaw going to my plus point. He began to trail his hands to grip my hips. quickly I pulled myself away from him smiling at him.

"spencer," I said breathing heavily

"yep what's the problem?" he said whilst peppering kisses all over my neck and face

"I still need to wash my hair," She said whilst moving closer to the showerhead, he chuckled

"Yeah okay, I’ll stop but I did wanna give you some advice and yes if I may be unsolicited as a white guy who doesn't really take care of his hair but you buy travel versions of your hair products, so you can have a hair routine even when we travel."

“Spence you are amazing and your a wonderful man I hope you know that”

his face morphed into a massive smile as his cheeks filled with blush "you've told me a couple of times"

"Okay, so my hair has shrunk about 10x smaller. Do you wanna wash it?"

"yes yes! I would love that" he took the shampoo from her shower floor and massaged the shampoo into her head scrubbing my head but somehow being gentle whilst still cleaning her hair well, he washed the shampoo out the repeated the process once more he then grabbed the conditioner and slathered it on her hair.

"Hey, can you pass me the Denman brush?"

"yeah sure Spence"

He began to brush and detangle her thick hair with the conditioner, he stopped every once in a while massaging her scalp whilst gently kissing her face in between.

I know that we haven't been going out for a while but I really like you Vanessa and your hair. I love your hair.

"giggling, I asked which one do you like more, me or my hair?"

"easy answer your hair"

Taglist

@alexlovescriminalminds @samuel-de-champagne-problems @halcyonsdream @cmvibess @vincentvanshoe @kk-kaiaw @jatthew

#criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer reid x black reader #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer red x black y/n #ssavanessa22 #cmwocappreciationweek #criminalmindswoc

[redstarbonky]

a breakdown of zemo reacting to dr. nagel, or, >:3 face versus :| face

!!!this post is packed with spoilers!!!

we all know by now that zemo tends to wear his villainous >:3 face while interacting with sam and bucky. it's the face of a dude who's not very stressed out! but this expression goes away during the encounter with dr. nagel. in fact, the whole gadfly personality melts away like it was never there.

so here's a BUNCH OF WORDS ABOUT IT while MAXING OUT THE NUMBER OF PICTURES I'M ALLOWED TO HAVE PER POST

tagging @h-zemo because...*vague zemo gestures*

in the dockyard scene, zemo is the first to poke around enough to discover the secret door to nagel's lab. he's a man on a mission...and notably, sharon and the lads have elected not to give him a weapon

in this image he is looking at nagel, who is unaware of his presence. this is the face he wore through most of CA:CW, when he was mostly thinking about how superpeople destroyed his entire country and got his family killed, and how that is all the fault of captain america (sort of), the serum's first and most dramatic success

zemo doesn't even want superpeople to exist. you can imagine what he would think of the continued existence of the serum itself, let alone a person who knows how to make it

not coincidentally, he has this expression the entire time they're dealing with nagel. this is the face of desire to murder

sam has taken nagel gently hostage (sam is good ok?) and 'introduced' him: "this is baron zemo. i know you've heard of him, too, right?" zemo just looks like this and doesn't say anything...

nagel avoided looking right at bucky after initially seeing him (probably thinking that that's the winter soldier, likely known to the world after CA:CW as a dangerous person, an assassin, a terrorist). but he does stop to make eye contact with zemo before sam pushes him along.

in what capacity has nagel heard of zemo? the aftermath of the events of CA:CW? has zemo tried to kill nagel before? i don't want to read too much into the glance here, it can be read as straightforward simmering anger at the intrusion. but nagel looked pretty intently at zemo for the half-second he was allowed to. contrast to sam, whom he barked at immediately, and bucky, who made him freeze on the spot

i don't believe nagel is anything more than a plot point, especially because he's dead by the end of the scene. but would i be surprised if zemo had looked for nagel before? not at all

as sam leads nagel out of the work area, zemo follows...(bonus handsome sam profile in blur-o-vision, you're welcome)

and when bucky subtly threatens nagel with a shot that should have deafened all of them but hey it's television, sam flinches, but zemo just looks dispassionately

like this pic doesn't need to be a gif. he doesn't flinch, he doesn't move his eyes, he's just looking

then he wanders around and looks for a...let's call it 'security system.' because as mentioned before, sharon & co. chose not to give him a weapon. he finds it under the lab table. i believe this gun is what nagel was likely going for when telling sam to gtfo of his lab and starting to leave his work area. zemo was part of a kill squad. he probably knows common hiding places for weapons

zemo casually walks back out, looks at nagel, and seems conveniently positioned to fire the chekhov's gun in his left hand

(btw i don't believe for a second that there's no serum in the lab. i think nagel is just lying, badly, and banking on the three of them having no idea what the finished serum looks like. THEY ARE LITERALLY SURROUNDED BY BLUE VIALS FFS anyway getting off-topic 😶)

then sharon bursts in to tell them they need to hurry up, and zemo takes advantage of the distraction to shoot nagel dead

he has pretty much the same expression when sam and sharon pin him (sam even yells "NO!" for the illicit chemist because he's a grade-A good guy, while bucky wanders around short-circuiting. seriously watch that part again it's hilarious. he's "???😐????" while everyone else is ">:OOO")

we don't clearly see zemo's face again until after he's escaped the burning lab, blown up several dudes, and taken off his thanos cosplay/stunt double face hider/bank robber mask

with a serum creator and a serum lab totally obliterated, the >:3 expression returns, and he's back to his normal, quietly ridiculous, vintage car otaku self.

it's not even just that zemo is pissed off throughout the scene - he's tense. when his >:3 face comes back, it's because he's not stressed anymore!

big ups to daniel brühl for this piece of interesting acting, i'm sorry it COMPLETELY went over my head until i rewatched the episode

#mcu meta #tfatws meta #zemo meta #tfatws spoilers #tfatws #helmut zemo #baron zemo #wilfred nagel

[muffindaddystyles]

𝐑𝐎𝐋𝐄𝐒 𝐑𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐄𝐃

Author note: Mention of drugs, sickness and blood (if you're not comfortable with it don't read it) . It mighty be heart warming fluffyyyyyy.

You're his kitten. No matter the consequences you're. Cause even in his anger sometimes (which's rare and it's on the silly go-to's) he still sticks to that pet name because he met you like that under the bus stop's shelter in a heavy rain offered you an umbrella (while you were huffing and puffing like a kitten annoyed with the weather), walked you home, had a tea with you and some chocolate chip cookies. Been bestfriends from that year and there isn't a red light to your guys wild adventures—but he's been having a rough time recently. Had a cruel heart shattering breakup from a relationship that he thought was a never ending dream (she brought him happiness in a weird way he couldn't put into words) indeed it tightened your chest but his happiness's most important to you. To overcome it he's been scribbling notebooks over notebooks with lyrics that screams he miss her and the sex for the most part of it. It breaks your heart.

He's usually the one to melt all over you, give you forehead kisses, cuddles you when your periods are the bitchiest, makes you brekkie if he stays a night, runs you a bath and sometimes brings you pomegranate berried candles (he lies that he got them as a gift, he's one hell of a liar). He takes care of you with so much gentleness and helps you with study after wiping your tears and reassuring you telling you how proud he's of you. It made you guilty sometimes 'cos if you'd be in camille's place. . .you'd never be able not to get jealous. She was cool with it. Fills you with another curiosity that maybe she treated it like a fling.

He was devastated. Knocking on your door feebly. Then the moment your small confused body was under his weary gaze, boom!! It crashed upon him like a pitch storm and he fell to his knees tucking his head in your armpit crying his heart out. At that moment you felt his pain radiating to you and twisting your own stomach with a dagger, it was insufferable. He gave out no-deep scrapes but not to freak your bones muttered that he lost her. Eventually his bottled up emotions seeped into hues infront of you by passing week and to your littlest of information you got to know that they didn't ended up well in some perspectives so their relationship turned out to be a downfall. So As, you do with your girlie best-friend when she have a breakup you did it with Harry too. It didn't included feral clubbing (you left that part to his mates) but watching sappy movies that could fill your ice-cream bucket once you eat it whole, doing homemade face masks, playing drunk uno and knocking on your neighbours door to run way at last, dragging his arse to museum and in all of this you ended up convincing him to adopt a kitty (she lives with you thou).

The roles have been reversed completely!

He's been living at your flat for five weeks now. It's fading his usual cheekiness and the itch to annoy you every second he gets. Instead, it's just eating, spending bits of hours with you, going out with his mates and coming back to crash at your couch padding in your room in the wee of night demanding a warm coddle from you and that his back hurts from the cruelty of that single spring popping from the leather, staying with him when he'd wrench his stomach out in the morning. He's sensitive. His heart's soft that's one of the reason he gets hurt real quick, you admire that about him and reminds him that it's one of his qualities you're totally in love with. You're gentle with him. Giving him space and time to recover. Going with him at his friend's birthday little get together not drinking at all knowing one would have to stay sober as he chugged red wine staining his hawain shirt and when he clumsily poked his pink tongue out lazily to reach for the cigarette in her hand you tugged him back into you before he'd burn his tongue with sparkles announcing it's time to head back home and he'd be a pain in arse (a beautiful one though because his antics makes you all mushy) when he pretended to steal sandwiches from the table hiding them under his shirt saying that "'m pregnant with twins and it's hard to carry them" while you dragged him outside making him wear his coat like a stubborn toddler. Making him cupcakes sometimes, playing with his fluff of curls while he reads the book she gave him. It hurts. But, it subsides down with his single amiable glance that tells you he needs you. He always had. He always will. You give him extra forehead kisses and pecks on cheek while leaving for UNI, because it's irresistible to give dust to his pouty sulk.

It's seven in the morning when he tumbled through your door (has a key, you even brought his clothes and toothbrush from his house—he even uses your strawberry scented shampoo and body wash) his nose tip blushed matching his cheeks, eyes pooling with haze and hair poking in every direction. You were studying for a class you've in an hour. When you saw his irirses blown out you arched your brow putting the cup down beside your thick book, to mingle his sadness he's experimenting different fun wild things (told you bout it and you even called Mitch to take care of him).

"How many am I, pet?" You asked walking towards him seeing him struggle to get out of his vans and your giggles echoed into coldness when he peers down at your crouched state with his gold fish-y eyes, "dunno. . . but ye'r seem like. .like a-a sunflower floatin' in me head." His lips molding around his each word agonisingly slow drawl and his voice hoarse and scratchy. "You need rest, bambi." You got him out of his jeans and socks knowing he despises to sleep with layers on. "I'll be back with you in some hours. Hmm? Then we'll snuggle into blankets, you me and. . .salsa the pussy cat." You have to control your laugh everytime you take the kitty's name (Harry's worst at giving names you were horrified when he once joked that he loves chelsea boots so much he could name his daughter Chelsea) He whines at that nodding his head but not loosening his grip from around your wrist while you tucked him under your baby green patch work quilt. It's like his brain and heart can't decide how to choose.

On your way back you got Jeff's call asking why Harry isn't picking his phone his own voice resembling that of Harry's and you know he'd be looking shit at the time. Harry was still snoring out like a bulb in bright day on his tummy and you shook him gently at first but when he didn't woke up you had to be a bit harsher. "Harry wake up pet. . . Jeff's been calling ye for since." But, not even a hum in response so you placed your finger under his nose checking if he's even alive. Gratefully he was just sleeping like a literal corpse (he argues that he isn't that bad of a sleeper but in fact he is. Everything around him would burn down and he wouldn't even change a side).

It was seven in the evening when you were preparing for dinner when he woke up grumpy. His nose scrunched up, lips quirked up as if he tasted something yucky and his gait jello. You eyed him quietly even when he came in kitchen to drink water.

"Jeff was callin'. . ." You quipped stirring the veggies before pouring soup into a bowl and sliding it his way on the counter, "I know bombarded me phone with calls—" He gruffed spooning a mouthful and you flinched when he tried to cool it inside his mouth with "hawahhoohaha" little sounds (he knew it was hot, he's just an impatient leech).

"Stop being a gremlin. He told me ye' aren't writing, leaving everything like a cliffhanger neither you're attending the meetings he calls you at. . . I think you're done with your mourning it's time to do what you actually love and is there for you. Your music." You frown seriously trying to put some senses into his forever high brain. He drops the spoon back and dips his brows frustratedly, pinching his eyes shut.

"Fuckin' hell. Stop being my mama!" It's not the first time you guys are arguing and you're not gonna take it to heart. You stood up towering him and jabbing your finger to his chest, "you better stop filling your system with drugs before eighteen year olds come to you thinking you're a drug dealer—" He snickers at that a total mocking one (you know he's doing nothing hard it's just shrooms in the safe environment otherwise you'd have never never allowed him) but still you had to bring him back to his line so it was necessary. "Piss off." He mutters still slurping on his soup and you left him there with a loud smack on his head, "Wanker."

You care about him. Always did. Always will. He's the love of your life. Even your love has nourishment of just water and lacks sunshine from your sun it's still there into existence, how could you see him like this? Wasting his precious time and energy. It's impossible.

All you heard before going to deep slumber was the tinsy creak of your main door after that it was silent and darkness until now your phone buzzed under your pillow resonating Niall's tired words. You were a wreck havoc fumbling for your coat and wallet, covering pathway to tube with shivering legs hallucinating that everyone's eyeing your fiddly self with judgemental stare even though there're few.

You rushed to Niall's doorsteps knocking like a maniac, "where's he? Is he okay? told ye—" You pushed him aside marching inside to look for him. "He looked fine, he's a strong guy y/n they took him to hospital." You snaps your neck raising your brows.

"What the fuck, d'ya mean hospital!?" Your heart hammering in her ribcage overthinking the worst scenarios. "Take me there. right. fuckin' now." You tell him firmly not caring even if he's high too. Niall leads you to his car heating it up in the first beat taking glances of your petite body leaning against the glass with lips sucked in, eyes watered and legs constantly on bounce so placed his hand atop your knee giving you reassuring squeeze and a genial smile.

Your pink cheeks warming up with the heat of hospital radiating your way and loud growl left your chest when your blurry vision cleared to the sight of dishelved Harry sitting on the bench outside of ER, his irirses weary, mouth stuffed with cotton and has few scratches of rashes on his elbows otherwise he's fine. With each step of yours towards him something kept breaking inside you like you're walking on the nails and it's ripping you raw. He raised his head timidly hearing footsteps and when his eyes fell over your worried state panic flashed over his features and his only gaze turned you a puddling emitting heavy sobs within you before reaching towards him. The reality of situation dawning upon you because from what Niall told you in the car that they were high trying to have some fun, drove around neighbour hood and Harry jumped out of the window and bit his tongue between his teeth resulting in heavy bleeding a deep gnash (the fuckin' dumbstick he is).

"I hate you. I hate you so fuckin' much! you bastard." You tried to shout at him but the voice that came out of your mouth was that of mice as you threw harsh blows at his chest, bottom lip jutting wet and salty tears tricking down. He wraps his hand around your wrists ushering you closer down to his chest speaking muffled, "'orry." causing you to grunt angrily into the crook of his neck.

"Sorry my ass!" When you tried to pull back he tightened his hold round your neck snuggling you warmly to him with a hum. Jeff came back with medicines and when he parted his lips to speak in his defence you ignored him wiping your tears with the heel of your palms muttering a, "I hate you guys." The drive back was silent and the walk to your flat too, you passed by him to lock yourself into your room (you wouldn't because of the fact you wouldn't be able to sleep if not sure he's okay few feets away from you). When Harry attempted to roll his tongue to make some words nothing came out but a hiss making you spin, "'s okay we'll speak in the mornin'." Saying this you headed to bed and when you were bout to turn the lamp off he was lurking at the foot of your bed with a pillow in his arms smushing his face into it and squeezing it close to his chest gesticulating you that he wants a cuddle.

"Only 'cos y're adorable." You muttered moving your bum to make space for him suppressing your cooe when he grinned showing nothing but snow cotton, fuckin' hell being this cute should be illegal! He snapped his finger to call Salsa and she instantly galloped to shrink into his side while you spooned him. You woke up to the running tap and the time you were stretching under your quilt with yawns he padded out looking healed than last night.

He got a little lisp as he spoke, "can we talk?" You nodded knuckling at your sticky eyes criss-crossing your legs. "'Forgive me kitten." He continues, "sorry fo' mistreatin' ye' last night." You shake your head not realizing tears are dropping down your collarbones.

"Please. . .I don't wanna be a party-pooper in your life. you can live your life to finest but not at the sake of your life Harry– and. . . and if you're trying to invade the feelin' of sadness with all of this I don't approve it. What bout me? dunno what'll do if somethin' will happen to you, pet. S'not fair to me. is it? Just. . . love y—" your confessions cameflouging with sobs.

"Oh baby. ." He immediately cradled you in his embrace trying to soothe you with 'sorrys' and 'I'll never do somethin' like that again, promise'. Smooching slobery kisses all over your face and when you gazed up at him attracting him closer to your clean warm features all he did was peck the corner of your lips tenderly pulling away to pat your hair with a sigh.

"So. . .ye' love me." He teased you and you rolled your eyes grabbing his chin with your fingers, "show me your tongue." biting down your laugh when he retorted misheviously, "hmm. Wanna kiss it better?" Blowing him off with a remark that he's an utter pervert hiding the fact it splashed crimson to your neck.

"Mind makin' me poor self some brekkie?" He pouts and you giggled pecking the corner of his burgundy lips getting a timid smile in return, "in trade of?" He hip-checked you straddling Salsa over his shoulder and grabbing her little paws to expertise her in some dancey-dance moves.

"Mind bloggin' orgasm–ique dinner." He cackled loudly at the end when you shook your head in fake disappointment at him and he clinged by your side helping you to make some breakfast.

Think so you guys will figure it out.

#harry styles #cute harry #harry styles blurb #hsh #fluff #harry angst #harry smut #harry styles smut #dom harry #harry styles fanfiction #naughty harry #harry #harry × y/n #solo harry #harry x reader #harry dirty one shots #harry styles dirty imagine #fanfic #harry styles fanfic #harry fanfic #harry art

[vidkid20ssimblrlair]

Episode 32: Sundown At Ashfield (Part 3)

Billy groaned. "I told you to come alone! What the hell?!"

"She's not supposed to be here," I fumed. "She must have followed me! Christ!"

"Yep," she grinned as she sat down beside me. She opened the twinkies and stuffed them in her mouth. Her cheeks budged out much like a chipmunk as she talked. "By the way, you forgot to mention some guy named, Bones visited us last night. And why is Gemma so weird? It sucks Ace lost his daughter, but that doesn't explain Gemma's wacko behavior."

"Oh, God! Were you here the whole time?!" I shrilled. "What the fuck?!"

"So you're Billy?" she smirked ignoring me. She held out her hand to him and they shook hands "I'm Audrey. Sup! The mask I saw earlier. From Naruto, right? How come they call you runt if it's a bear?"

Billy's eyes widen. "You like anime?"

"Yeah. I wish I had a manga to read, but yeah I love that stuff."

"A fellow anime fan. Also a video game fan from what I hear. I thought they all died out by now," he chuckled. "Everyone thinks my mask is a dog. When I tried to tell them where it's from and what it is, it's like I'm speaking a foreign language."

"Oh, Vince zones out when I talk about that stuff too. I know the feeling."

I scoffed. "Um...hey nerds. This conversation is quite riveting, but..."

"Woah! Wait! Are you the girl who has the samurai sword?"

"Yes. How you know?"

"I've sort of seen you before when they put me on surveillance duty once....at your house."

"What?!"

"I know it sounds creepy but...it wasn't my choice," he babbled. He then blushed. "If it makes you feel better, I thought you were super cool. I even gave you a cool name. Samurai. Hey, where is your sword if you don't mind me asking?"

She rolled her eyes and looked back at me. "And this guy is your friend?"

"Nevermind that. I know he's a creep-"

"Hey!"

"Anyway, I wasn't done asking him shit, so can you politely hush!" I growled at her. "So buddy boy, why are they watching us? Why were you put on surveillance duty at our house?!"

"Well, I didn't know it was your house at the time. All I saw was Ms. Audrey here and some woman with short brown hair, but I had no idea they were part of your group!" he cried. "I swear! If I knew I would have warned you sooner."

"Warn us of what?"

"That they plan to take your place from you. If Gemma's there, she's there to spy and fuck with you. If Ace is keeping you alive, he wants to use you. That's got to be it."

"Well, that comforting," Audrey said sarcastically.

"To answer your earlier questions about Gemma and Bones,...um Audrey?"

"That's the name."

"Well, Bones visited you to check on Gemma. Gemma was probably signaling Ace and Co. every night to show everything was fine. Then you tied her up so Bones probably came to check on her when he didn't receive any signal or indication she was fine," he said. "As for Gemma's or Red's deal, I believe she was in an insane asylum at one point."

"You're serious?" I gasped.

"It's not confirmed, but when we found her she was wearing a hospital gown over jeans with a band around her wrist.  The band was pretty worn out but it indicated as such. She was also staying in a burnt-out hospital building as well. She slit the neck of one of our men when we came looking for supplies in the place. It was a big burly guy too. Ace thought it was pretty damn impressive she could take down a guy like that and he took her under his wing. He likes to think he's building some sort of army. I don't know why but people like that fit the mold for him but they do."

"Well, that's even more comforting," Audrey groaned. “Continue. I have to go to the bathroom and this willow tree is looking pretty tempting.”

“Ugh, can’t it wait?”

“No, and don’t look! You and Billy advert your eyes or something.”

“Like anyone would want to look at you anyway!”

She glared at me and stuck her tongue out playfully. She then walked over to the tree and shot us a fleeting look before disappearing behind it. I sighed and turned back to face Billy. The guy looked pretty mortified and covered his face with both hands.

“Not much experience with girls?”

“Huh?” 

“Nothing. It’s getting pretty dark. Going rain.”

He turned his whole body around on the log and continued hiding his face behind his hands comically. "You probably should go then. Night and rain are a recipe for danger. And if Big Red or Gemma as you call her is at your house, it's not safe to leave your people with her. She could be up to anything. Not to mention, what Ace might have planned for you."

I nodded. "Is anything we can do?"

"I'll do my part on the inside. You? Um...well let's see. I can draw you a map of the junkyard. Provide you weapons. Anything to get the upper hand. Then we can try-"

"Enough!!!" I heard a woman shout.

I then heard muffled cries behind me. I slowly looked back to see to my horror, Billy's sister holding Audrey hostage. She had one hand on her mouth and the other aimed a gun at her head. Her face covered by a mask just like before.

"Get up!"

"Sis?" Billy yelped. "What...?"

"Shut up, Billy. Shut your mouth!" she snapped. "Now get up! Both of you!"

We did as she demanded and she took her hand away from Audrey's mouth. She used two fingers to fire off a whistle.

Then more masked figures appeared walking up to us. I looked around and realized we were now surrounded.

Part 1

Part 2

Part 4 is the last part for this one.

#sims 3 dead on arrival #ts3 dead on arrival #sims 3 doa #ts3 doa #sims 3 #ts3 #sims 3 story #ts3 story #simblr #sims 3 simblr #ts3 simblr #dead on arrival season 2 #doa season 2

[seriouslyblacklikemysoul]

Her eyes, the stars - Bucky Barnes x Reader (Steve Rogers x Reader)

[I know, I am a ghost. Sorry guys. Enjoy.]

The reminiscence of a rose - the single flower that’s so impossible to hate, delicate and pretty, even when it stops blooming. Her voice could calm even the most chaotic oceans, always soothing with soft notes of comfort. Even her eyes could mesmerize the most soulless creature; her sweet face left him dreaming in heartache. On the nights his loneliness stung him harder than cheap liquor; he was always thinking of her. For he reveled in the memory of her heart placed on his hands. As he tried to get drunk on other people’s skin. Yet all that regret still burned his chest. And he realized that he once had the best. Since she loved his highs and lows. He thought about what he once held. He regretted leaving her. But she deserved more than his pettiness and demeanor.

She begged herself to stop loving him.She hated herself for all the mistakes she had made, all those wrong decisions - she blamed him for he made her vulnerable. He was the sun, never really committed to one planet, always dancing around the universe, with bright colors revealing themselves, leaving her in awe. Her heavy blues of night opened to reveal the chariot of the sun lighting up the sky with various shades of yellow and gold. The feeling was almost theatrical and the dramatic intensity was palpable. How could they end up in the same sky, when he was the sun and she was always so fond of the night? They were just celestial objects, trying to find the one perfectly still moment, so they could co-exist in harmony without worrying about nature's balance. That moment had passed them by, ignoring their desperate attempts to escape the chaotic force.She was a whole universe in motion - he had guessed that was why she seemed so tired lately...It must be an exhausting, yet beautiful thing to brush the orbits of all the universes she walked by. He had tried to stop thinking that he made her so unhappy. He couldn't. Instead, he tried to understand her a bit better than before, to get close to her, without hurting her. Again. She was no pawn in his game, she was clever and cunning - but just to hide her true self.

"You think you can define me, that I am a tick in just one box. Like my being is a door that a single key unlocks. But let me tell you something - something I figured out after you broke me. I have the universe inside, I hold an untamed ocean with a constantly changing tide. I'm home to endless mountains with tips that touch the sky, flocks of grand migrating birds and deserts harsh and dry. Please, don't tell me that you know me. That "this right here is what you are", trying to get an old and very dead version of me back. I am the universe in motion, for I was born from the stars" she was talking to him, trying to make a point, to seem sure about what she had become - but she was scared of her heart. Oh, the things it made her do. He wasn't taken aback, which surprised her. He was looking into her eyes, watching the soft colors of the sky fooling around with the dark strokes of her irises. It was true, her eyes held the stars. She closed her eyes, overwhelmed by the swirling feelings inside her. She felt every single cell of her body begging for her to forgive him - there was nothing to forgive, really, for he had done nothing wrong. It was her that could not - would not - handle things. She never saw herself in a relationship - so many obligations. She was not made for ballgowns and parties but for battlefields and saddles.

"I am yours, forever yours… and when the last star of the universe blinks silent, I will still be yours", his answer came naturally to him. It was the most sincere thing he had ever said. He knew her as a sea breeze, but now she met her as a hurricane. So he knew, she needed to be alone. She had been craving freedom so long and he had been blind. He was a liar- he lied to her, to the entire world, to his own self. He wasn't the Golden Boy, people made him to be. He had hurt her in ways he couldn't have imagined before. She softly smiled to his words, because she knew he was being honest. Once upon a time, everything was magical and they were found themselves walking through a chaotic paradise. The entire multi-universe had changed.

"I might have been too harsh, Stevie. Truth is that this, us, has turned to dust right after we were defeated. Five years now, we have been foolish enough to try and make things work. We have been lying to everyone, we want them to move on and be alright when I know that all those sleepless nights we have been thinking of a way to make everything as it was. I also know, and please do not try to deny it, that you are not mine. Not really, not entirely, not ever. For you, it's always gonna be Peggy. Accepting that, was the hardest thing I have ever done". His face twisted in a guilty way. Everything she had experienced for the first time, had been with him. It hurt her but she would move on, find someone else to make her feel alive again.

"I... I am sorry. I love you, you should know that. It's just. I can't shake the feeling… I am so sorry" he calmly apologized to her. He couldn't control his heart.

" And I love you. You can't unlove someone. You can, however, become just friends with them. I wouldn't want to lose you from my life. So... Hey dude" she tried to change the dark and painful situation into something less... 

It all happened so quickly and slow at the same time. It was a disaster and a triumph. Everyone came back - well, not everyone. Once she laid eyes on Bucky, she ran like hell and almost knocked him down as she enveloped him in a bone-crushing hug. How she had missed him - her best friend, companion and well...it would take her a while to admit it but there were butterflies, even though she did push them away every time, convincing herself that it was nothing more.

"I missed you Jay, so damn much" was all that she managed to say before Steve called them to assemble. 

They won. And they lost. All thanks to the amazing Tony Stark. After a horrific scene of Thanos wearing the gauntlet and snapping his fingers - only to realize that Tony had stolen them right on time - everyone's heart fell and crushed and burnt. Yes, Tony defeated Thanos but at what cost?

He had always been the only father figure she knew- if she thought that standing against him with the Sokovian Accords was devastating, this was torture.

When things slowed down, Steve looked at her for the first time in what seemed like a lifetime. Her porcelain-like skin was bruised, stained and twisted forming a pained mask, her hands were trembling and she was leaning against his best friend- why was this the first time he was noticing the look on Bucky's face? Why was this the first time he felt that his friend craved to be more than a friend to her? 

Life has a strange way of revealing her secrets, a dark sense of humor. It goes on, like a circular river, never-ending, never resting. After the simple ceremony to honor Tony's memory, she took a step back, asking for a few weeks off of the team to help Pepper and Morgan. All she wanted was to feel normal again. One more task before that though.

Seconds before Steve stepped into that platform to be teleported back in time, she called for him. He knew it and so did she. She had seen it in his eyes after they had mourn Natasha. In all honesty, she understood why - he deserved the life that was taken away from him, without asking him if he liked the alternative options. Bucky knew it. He knew it when he saw him on the blood-stained battlefield. He felt it in their hug. He also knew that she knew- he was the one both her and Steve had asked for help before Thanos. He was the one who swallowed his feelings for her and gave her a friendly shoulder to rest her head. "Thank you" Steve mouthed to her. She smiled, eyes covered in tears threatening to spill. "Go".And he was gone. Bucky gave her hand a gentle squeeze and she turned to face him. Unknown him, she had become aware of his feelings. And her own, slowly but steadily. "A soul that carries empathy is a soul which has survived enormous pain" she softly whispered as if she didn't want to be heard. He felt that she could read his mind. All those years ago, another Bucky had existed- one who flirted shamelessly with everyone. He had to get in touch with him if he wanted a chance with her, he thought, only to be proven wrong after a while. He just had to be himself. 

She had finally realized that Steve and her were exactly like the moon and the sun- and their time together was an eclipse, a breathtaking phenomenon, a glimpse of what it could have been. A moment. And that was okay. She regretted nothing. It was perfect in its imperfection.

She found herself knocking Bucky's door, not knowing why. All she wanted was to see the stars but somehow when she was greeted by sliver blue eyes, the stars seemed inefficient. He was the night, she thought.

"Can I stay here for a while?"... because I am scared when I am alone? He opened up his door to let her get inside because he knew the part of the sentence that left unsaid. His room was warm with a serene view of the night sky. He knew that she loved to gaze the stars, how she would always complain that the moon was a hypocrite. But not tonight. She felt gravitated towards him which made him blush, thankful for the darkness. To say that he hadn't wished for a moment with her, it would be a lie. He was pulled towards her like a magnet and in all honesty, he didn't want to leave far away and get over her.

"Can't sleep?" he asked her in a hushed tone as he laid to his bed, eyes watching her every move. She let a tired chuckle and sat down next to him. He pierced her eyes and she felt naked - and she didn't mind. It was okay for him to see her in all her doomed glory.

"Jay, its past midnight and I’ve pretty much thought of all the words hoping to find something that can remedy this... I can try but my vocabulary falls short when it comes to describing the matters of my heart. My heart. Not yours - mine. I could fill pages about the likes and dislikes of your heart. What makes you tremble what softens you up. I know you like the back of my hand. I know your anger and I know your vulnerability. Vulnerability…. what does that even mean? I guess it happens when you finally take the leap to open up to one who might not ever see you the same again. I guess that your weakness is not supposed to be a different form of feeling when it comes to me. And it isn't. I guess that attachments don’t exist between the two of us. But it does. And I guess, well I guess, that I love you a bit more each day and bit less on the days you choose to ignore me. No, wait, that's a lie. And I know that this is way too forward and yes, he was, is, your best friend, and my ex, which can be a bit awkward -  but you know what? He made a choice, but not before I do. I had already fallen for you and if it's weird -" he did not let her finish. The words coming from hee mouth were burning fires inside his head, for years now. His lips were ever so gently upon hers. It almost didn't feel like a kiss.

In the end, everyone wanted to be like Icarus, hoping to fly high and soar far. Nobody was satisfied with their standing and kept pushing their limits. And that was human...  full of life, blinded, arrogant, wonderful... always falling in the end. But not every fall hurts. She landed softly on his lips, her hands caressing his face and his were holding her tight as if she was a dream and he would soon wake up.

He was the stars and she was the moon. Finally, it worked.

'From stars we came, to stars we'll return and in the middle is all we are'

#marvel imagine #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers imagine #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x reader #captain america #captain america fanfiction #captain america imagine #winter soldier imagine #winter soldier fanfiction #Avengers #The Avengers #endagme #avengers endgame #reader insert #captain america x reader #winter soldier x reader #natasha romanoff imagine #tony stark imagine #iron man #black widow

[blancheludis]

@ironhusbandsweek @rhfenovemberbash Day 4: “I’ll always protect you.”

Fandom: Marvel, Iron Man Characters: Tony Stark/James “Rhodey” Rhodes, Howard Stark Tags: Grief, Howard’s A+ Parenting, Love, Emotional H/C, Funeral Words: 4.315

Summary: "Boy," Howard calls over the cemetary, "did you really bring your college fling home?" Rhodey builds himself up, never letting go of Tony's hand. “No, sir,” he says, putting a slight emphasis on sir that could mean anything from a gentle warning that they are in public to an outright threat. “He brought his best friend to the funeral of his other best friend.”

- Jarvis dies and leaves Tony devastated. Rhodey is there to remind him that he is not alone.

---

When Tony does not turn up to the party they promised to meet up at, Rhodey’s first reaction is annoyed fondness. The past weeks were crazy, stuffed to the brim with tests and experiments and some extracurricular projects that Tony was quiet about enough to tell Rhodey they were for Stark Industries.

Things are supposed to calm down now, and the party was a good starting point for that. Rhodey has not seen Tony drink anything alcoholic for over a week, which must be some kind of record.

Dodging dozens of other students, Rhodey makes his way through the house for one last search for Tony. It is not like he needs Tony there to have fun. They do things separately often enough. But if Tony is not here, he is in the lab, where he often forgets all about the time. If Rhodey just leaves him there, he will never hear the end of it.

He could call, although Tony never hears the phone ringing and would not pick up even if he did. He is like that when he is working. It is amusing, at least when Rhodey does not have to walk all over campus to get Tony because of it.

The truth is, he does not have as much fun without Tony. His friends call them sickeningly co-dependant, which he does not mind. He loves spending time with Tony, and they did not have too many chances for that over the past weeks, at least not if it did not involve their classwork. Rhodey wants Tony here, so he goes to find him.

He walks leisurely over to the labs. It does not matter, he thinks, if they do not go back to the party together afterwards. A quiet night together is just as enjoyable, if not more so.

The labs, when he gets there, are dark. No music is turned up loud enough to turn people deaf two floors up.

“Tony?” Rhodey calls nonetheless.

He walks further in and finds no sign of Tony anywhere. Nothing has even changed from the last time they were here together. That is when Rhodey knows something is wrong.

Without further ado, he hurries towards their dorm, wondering where Tony could have gone. It is possible that they missed each other somewhere on the way, that Tony arrived at the party after Rhodey has left. Somehow, Rhodey has a feeling that is not it.

Early into their acquaintance, before they were even friends, Rhodey learned to worry about Tony. No matter how well things seem to be going, there is always another layer, another issue.

Rhodey takes two steps at a time as he hurries up to their floor and then down the hall. The entire house appears deserted. Everybody is glad to have some time to breathe again.

Rushing into their room, Rhodey stops short in the doorway. He was right. Tony is here and something is wrong.

Tony sits on the ground in front of his bed, legs pulled up to his chest, staring at something only he can see. He does not look up when Rhodey comes in, does not even appear to notice. His face is slack, far from the ready mask he hides behind at any time. He looks ready to shatter at one wrong word.

“Tony,” Rhodey says, managing to sound much calmer than he feels. Everything that goes wrong with Tony automatically pushes him into a panic. It is a trained instinct because Tony does not do half-measures.

Slowly, Rhodey walks into the room and crouches down in front of Tony, far enough to not crowd him but close enough to reach out if Tony will allow it.

“What happened?” Rhodey asks and saves all the platitudes laying on his tongue for when he knows what is going on.

Tony winces but it happens slowly. Not like Rhodey’s sudden presence has startled him but like he is fighting to return to the presence. When he finally looks up, his eyes are red-rimmed, with an unhealthy sheen to them.  

He stares at Rhodey like he does not fully register his presence.

“Jarvis,” he then says, slowly, toneless. “He’s –” Tony’s eyes drop as he finishes with a mere whisper, “dead.”

Rhodey stiffens. Of all the problems that ran through his mind on his way over here, death was not one of them. He thought of something they could tackle, something he could make better.

“What?” he asks before he can stop himself. And then, even worse, “How?”  

He wants to reach out, to help keep Tony upright, but he stays carefully back, not sure how Tony would react to a sudden touch.

Staring at the ground in front of him, Tony says, “Cancer. It was in his lungs.” He tries a shrug but is too tense for it. “He told me over Christmas but he said it was under control. And now he’s – he –”

A sob tears itself from Tony’s throat and it might just be the most terrible sound Rhodey has ever heard. Worse, it causes Tony’s composure to crack completely. A well of tears is spilling from his eyes, and he does not reach up to wipe them away as if he does not even notice them.

Not saying anything, Rhodey sidles close and pulls Tony into his arms. The way Tony buries his face against Rhodey’s chest breaks his heart. When he feels the tremors running through Tony’s body, he holds on tighter.

“I’m sorry,” he says, because there is nothing else, nothing to take away the pain of losing someone one loves.

Rhodey knows that Jarvis means a lot to Tony, but he cannot possibly know how much. That would have required them to talk about life at the mansion, about Howard, about how skittish Tony is around people when he is not putting on the full Stark heir act. For all that Rhodey is sure he is Tony’s best and possibly only friend, there is so much that he does not know. He has never insisted on finding out either, because he figured Tony would talk when he is ready, but now he wishes he would know more, if just to make Tony’s burden a little easier to bear.

“I don’t know what to do,” Tony mutters into the by now damp fabric of Rhodey’s shirt, several minutes later.

Helplessly, Rhodey says, “I’m here. Whatever you do, I’m here.”

It is not enough. He knows that before Tony shoots upright again, not quite letting go of Rhodey but bringing some distance between them. He knows it before he sees the expression on Tony’s face close off. He knows that before Tony says a single word.

Loving Tony has always been riddled with trials and errors. Rhodey has always seen that as a good thing because it meant they were one step up from the approachable, eager—to-please mask Tony likes to wear for other people. It also meant hurting each other occasionally. Rhodey likes to believe that is worth it since it allows him to see the real Tony underneath. The soft smiles and tireless genius, but also the nightmares and the flinching away. And now the grief.

“You don’t understand,” Tony says and looks like his tone is supposed to be sharp. It is still full of tears, however, sounding choked. “Jarvis is everything. Without him I wouldn’t be here.” He does not specify whether he means here as in MIT or here as in alive. From how little Rhodey thinks of Howard, it might be both. “He stood up to Howard, he made me laugh, he told me it doesn’t matter if my designs don’t work on the first try or if they’re even useless. He was always there.”

It looks like Tony has more to say, but his voice gives out. His lips keep moving for a moment, giving way to more heartbreak.

“I’m always going to protect you, Tones,” Rhodey says. He does not know where the words are coming from, but he means them with every fibre of his being.

Tony looks at him, glassy-eyed and uncomprehending. “What?”

There is no going back now, even if Rhodey wanted to.

“I can’t replace Jarvis. I can’t make it stop hurting,” he says and hates it, hates that he cannot lessen Tony’s pain. “But I can take over his job of protecting you.”

They do not talk after that. Tony sinks back into Rhodey’s arms, allowing himself to be had. That, he supposes, is answer enough, and Rhodey is glad for it. He is not sure how to keep his promise for Tony is a wildcard, tripping over everyday things while remaining unmoved by the greater despairs of life. Sometimes it seems like Tony thinks everything is fixable except for himself.

It does not matter what is coming for them. Rhodey might have said the words only now, but he has been determined to keep Tony safe for much longer.  

 ---

The funeral is a small affair. Howard Stark came but managed to leave the media circus always following him behind. So it is just a few friends, and no family but Tony. Howard holds a speech, but Tony does not. He explained that his friendship with Jarvis is not something that should be dissected by the nameless onlookers, and he did not want his experiences to be compared to Howard’s. He could not have been entirely truthful either because any of the guests could have blabbed to the press about the not so harmonious life in the Stark mansion.

Rhodey and Tony are at the very front but opposite from Howard. That leaves them plenty of opportunity to glare at each other, but at least it makes conversation impossible. It is grating on Tony nonetheless. When Rhodey notices Tony’s hands tensed up into fists, he reaches out and takes one of them into his, coaxing the fingers loose. It might be his imagination, but Tony relaxes a bit after that.

That is, of course, only until Howard stalks towards them the moment the ceremony is over.

Rhodey loosens his hold on Tony’s hand a bit without letting go. It is a silent offer in case Tony thinks it will do more damage if they are openly holding hands in front of his father. He is glad, however, when Tony keeps clinging to him, giving no sign of wanting to withdraw.

“Boy,” Howard calls when he is still several feet away. The derision in his tone has Rhodey’s dislike rising immensely. “Did you really bring your college fling home?”

This is it, Rhodey thinks, the time to stand tall and deliver on his promise to protect Tony. He wishes his first adversary would have been some jerk on campus and not Howard Stark himself, but he is glad to step up nonetheless. Tony has had to deal with this for far too long.  

“No, sir,” Rhodey says, putting a slight emphasis on sir that could mean anything from a gentle warning that they are in public to an outright threat. “He brought his best friend to the funeral of his other best friend.”

Howard builds himself up. He is not tall, not compared to Rhodey. Next to him, Tony shrinks automatically, clearly wishing to hide.

“You should take care with how you speak to me,” Howard barks, with no amount of subtlety.

“Oh, I am,” Rhodey answers with a smile that does not show teeth but is sharp nonetheless. “Someone’s always listening, right?”

Red creeps up Howard’s neck as his face pinches with anger. Inwardly, Rhodey curses himself for causing a scene when all he wanted to do was give Tony a break.

That is, thankfully, when they are called to go outside to lower the coffin into the grave. They stare at each other a moment longer, both promising that this is not over.

If possible, Tony gets even tenser when they stand around Jarvis’ last resting place, even more ready to disappear somewhere his pain cannot touch him. Rhodey stands strong at his side and never lets go of his hand, not even when it is Tony’s turn to cover the coffin with soil. Tony’s grip is even painful at times, but Rhodey is just glad he can offer some comfort at all.

Afterwards, people linger, talking to each other, while Tony stands over the grave, looking down with so much sorrow on his face that it makes Rhodey’s chest constrict.

Howard’s booming voice cuts through the serenity of the cemetery as he makes conversation with the other funeral guests. That is enough to rouse Tony from his stupor.

He looks up balefully, appearing ready to throw himself into a fight.

“I don’t mean to be disrespectful,” Rhodey speaks up, deceptively light, “but it’s a good thing this is not an event for smiling. I’m not sure I could do that around him.”

It is meant as a distraction, and it works somewhat at least. Tony does not stop glaring at his father, but he appears more present again, as if he remembers where he is and that Rhodey is at his side.

“What is he even doing here?” Tony growls.

He does not seem to be looking for an answer, but Rhodey is glad enough to hear Tony’s voice to accept even this less than ideal topic.

“You told me they were friends,” he offers, aiming for nonchalance.

Tony aims a glance at him that appears to question Rhodey’s sanity. “Ages ago,” he replies, turning his attention back on Howard. “He certainly did not act like a friend over the past years. Or ever, since I was born.”

Tugging slightly at Tony’s hand, Rhodey shifts them so that Howard is not in Tony’s direct line of sight anymore. He is relieved when Tony follows without putting up a fight. This day is supposed to be about Jarvis, not about nursing grudges.

“If Jarvis stood up to Howard, he might have only been able to because they were friends,” Rhodey argues. He cannot imagine the older Stark would have kept someone in his employ who went up against him on a regular basis just to protect the son Howard does not seem to like very much either. “Your old man certainly looks like he would love to gut me right now and I didn’t even say what I really wanted to.”

The ghost of a smile lifts Tony’s lips for a mere second. “You interrupted his favourite sport of yelling at me.”

“It’s not right.” Rhodey should have let it go. He should have accepted Tony’s willingness to talk and pushed the conversation to safer topics. He cannot help the automatic distrust. They might have never talked much about Howard, but he has always hung like a shadow over Tony’s shoulder.

Right in front of him, Tony withdraws further into himself. “It’s what it is.”

Scrambling to return to a lighter tone, Rhodey says, “Never thought I’d hear you say that, Mr. it’s-only-impossible-because-I-haven’t-done-it-yet.”

It hurts to hear Tony like that, because for all of his issues and insecurities, he is mostly convinced that there is a way for everything. Just not where he, personally, is involved.

“That’s Jarvis’ doing too,” Tony answers quietly, eyes resting on the fresh grave. “He always told me that if something didn’t work, it just wasn’t yet time for it.”

Rhodey moves a little closer to Tony so that their shoulders touch. Ever since they left Boston, Tony has looked cold, washed out, like all the life is draining out of him.

“I wish I could have met him,” Rhodey says, and he really does.

As far as family goes, Jarvis was Tony’s more than his parents were, responsible for shaping him into the person he is now. The Stark act might be Howard’s doing, but the sweet, kind-hearted Tony underneath could only survive because Jarvis cared for him.

Looking up, Tony’s expression is so fragile, Rhodey almost expects him to burst into tears again. “He would have liked you.”

Rhodey nods, squeezing Tony’s hand. “I hope so. We both love you, after all.”

He is rewarded with another small smile that lightens up this drab day immensely. Rhodey knows it for the fleeting thing it is, so he savours it while it lasts.

“You make that sound like a defect,” Tony jokes, although there is no hiding the serious edge underneath, always doubting everything good that is happening to him.

That just makes Rhodey want to intercept Howard Stark before he leaves for a little chat, despite having promised to be civil.

“It’s a bit of work,” Rhodey admits lightly. Before Tony can get the wrong ideas, he adds, “But it’s the most rewarding thing I’ve ever done.”

Tony sighs but seems to stand a little straighter again, not as ready to collapse. “You’re a sap.”

Very much aware of that, Rhodey shrugs. “Well, you make it easy.”

The peace sadly does not last forever. While Tony remains in front of the grave, trying to say goodbye to his oldest friend and almost-father, the rest of the funeral guests trickle out of the cemetery. Everyone but Howard Stark. After having made small talk with everyone, he lingers. He might want to have some minutes alone with his deceased friend too, but once he turns, his eyes fall immediately on Tony, narrowed and still somewhat angry.

“Your father is coming towards us,” Rhodey warns even before Howard has taken the first step to give Tony ample time to collect himself. They have both expected another confrontation, but they had hoped that Howard would show enough common courtesy to not do so over Jarvis’ grave.

Tony straightens abruptly, the dismay on his face quickly replaced by something resigned. “Let’s go then,” he says, turning his back on the new headstone as if he had not just looked like he would never be able to leave it behind.

This strength is something to be admired. People usually think that the Starks, with all their money and their genius, have the whole world bowing to them with nary a problem slowing them down. That is a lie. For all that Tony is practiced in keeping up his smirk and doing what he set out to do, there is nothing that he cannot turn into an obstacle, nothing that cannot raise a mountain of self-doubt. And yet, nobody who does not look beneath the surface would ever know.

To himself, Rhodey can admit that he thinks it is also immensely sad. All these scars hidden beneath that glamour and shiny confidence. All these steps Tony takes despite expecting the ground to crumble away beneath him.

“Are you ready?” Rhodey asks, because he has once sworn himself he would show Tony every kindness. “I can stall him if you need some more time.”

He does not yet know how to do that without making a scene, without making even more of an enemy of one of the most powerful men in the country. Yet, it does not matter. He would do anything to make life a little bit easier for Tony.

“You shouldn’t make him angry,” Tony cautions but looks grateful for Rhodey’s offer.

With a smile for how brazen he has become, Rhodey shrugs. “I’m not afraid of him.”

That is not the complete truth. Of course he is afraid of Howard Stark. Not of his money or his company or how he could ruin Rhodey’s career in the Air Force with just a few words into the right ears. He is afraid of how much more damage that man can deal his own son. With his negligence, his derision, this shaking anger at everything and everyone in the world.  

“Perhaps you should be,” Tony says, glancing in his father’s direction with a blank face.

He is about to turn away when Rhodey steps in front of him, causing him to look up.

“Tones, I don’t care,” Rhodey intones firmly, trying to convey how much he means these words. “I’m here for you and only for you. If you need more time to say goodbye to your friend, I’ll get you that time.”

Tony leans close, not quite like he wants to be hugged, but like he is drawn in by Rhodey’s warmth. “Thank you, Rhodey,” he says, and now his smile is brighter.

“Any time,” Rhodey promises, smiling back.

With a nod, Tony takes a step back and throws a last longing glance at the Jarvis’ name on the headstone.

“I think I’m done here. That’s not –” Tony shrugs with a sheepish expression. “Jarvis is not here. He was always so alive, he wouldn’t want me to think of him dead in that grave.”

They turn towards the exit, which will lead them right past Howard who is still coming towards them. Rhodey does not offer to take another way when he sees the determination in Tony’s shoulder. They cannot run from all their battles.

“Where do you think you’re going?” Howard questions when they do not slow down, intent on just passing him by.

Rhodey bites his tongue to not snap anything back. He will step in if he feels he is needed, but this is still Tony’s father, and Tony knows how to handle him, knows how to not make everything worse.

“Home,” Tony answers simply and steps a bit closer to Rhodey as if declaring his allegiance.

In response, Howard’s eyes narrow and Rhodey has to suppress a victorious grin.

“Your mother is waiting for you at the mansion,” Howard says, causing Tony to stiffen further.

He takes a deep breath, and Rhodey wonders how he manages to keep his expression so blank.

“If she wanted to see me,” Tony says with definite accusation in his tone, “she should have come here.”

Tony’s mother has featured more often in the few stories he has told of home, but even in those she was mostly absent, withdrawn, less a mother than just another inhabitant of a house too big to allow anyone growing up in it to not be lonely.

“Watch your tone, boy.” Eyes narrowed and red creeping up into his face, Howard Stark looks like he is suited for nothing but fury. It is hard to believe he sired someone so kind-hearted. “She’s not well.”

“Come to think of it, I’m not either,” Tony replies sharply in that tone he usually reserves for professors too stubborn to admit Tony’s way of solving a problem might be better than theirs. “And we’ve got classes in the morning.”

They do not, but Rhodey nods nonetheless. If home is what Tony needs, they will go there, and hide away from everything until Tony feels better.  

“You don’t care about your classes,” Howard snaps, making Rhodey wonder whether he knows his son at all.

Straightening, Tony says, “You’re wrong.”

With that, he starts walking again, clinging to Rhodey’s hand as if he is afraid he will not follow.

“Anthony,” Howard barks and Tony winces slightly but does not stop.

“Goodbye, Dad,” he throws over his shoulder.

Rhodey takes care to walk a bit behind Tony, guarding his back. It might be a ridiculous thought that Howard would attack them, but he nonetheless makes a show of it, making a statement.

They are silent until they reach their car and close the doors behind them. Sadly, Howard does not stand on the cemetery anymore, looking after them, seething, but has already gone over to his own car too, barking at his driver.

They wait until he is gone, leaving the engine off. Tony looks a little lost but not as fragile anymore.  

“Are you all right?” Rhodey asks, even though he knows it is a stupid question. He needs to say something, though, needs to pull Tony out of his thoughts before they have him spiralling down a road he cannot get out of alone anymore.

“No,” Tony replies with a sad smile. “But I think I will be.”

Rhodey will give his best to make it so, no matter what obstacles are thrown in their way. When they first met, he never would have thought that Tony would quickly become one of the most important people in his life. Looking at him now, he would not have it any other way. Life without Tony would not only be boring but much less bright

“You really want to go back to Boston today?” Rhodey asks.

It might be good for Tony to be somewhere else, somewhere new where nothing can remind him of Jarvis, so he can get some sleep tonight.

Tony’s features darken immediately. “Well, I’m not going to the mansion.”

Shaking his head immediately, Rhodey amends his question. “I thought we could find a motel for the night.”

At any other time, the way Tony’s face scrunches up would be amusing. He might not be as much of a snob as Rhodey had initially feared, but there are still things that show exactly how differently they grew up.

“A motel?”

Grinning, Rhodey nods with more enthusiasm than the situation warrants. “Yes, something small and dingy with a too narrow bed, so I can hold you all night and you won’t have an excuse to withdraw into yourself.”

It is a good plan. Tony is good at getting lost in his own head. At the same time, he is still so touch-starved, so hungry for any kind of positive attention, that Rhodey’s arms might just be the safest place for him tonight.

Tony must have come to the same realization because his face becomes incredibly soft.

“Thank you, Rhodey,” he says and leans over to rest against Rhodey.

“Always, Tones,” Rhodey promises and shifts to put his arm around Tony. “I mean it.”

It is not very comfortable, but they stay like this for a long while nonetheless. They are together and nothing else matters for the moment.

#ironhusbandsweek #rhfe #RhodeyTonyNovemberBash #rhodeytony #ironhusbands #tony stark #james rhodey rhodes #jarvis dies #minor character death #funeral #grief #tony needs a hug #love #friendship #emotional hurt/comfort #howard's a+ parenting #my writing #ao3

[easynaturalhairstyle]

Blond ambition: how to bleach your hair

Are you bored with your hair? Think about whether it is stylish to change the colors of your fashion, why not your follicles? Then I think about using platinum.

Everyone from Channing Tatum to Riz Ahmed has been with them lately, but bleached hair has been a bold option for the barber chair for decades. Behind some of the most famous men's hairstyles in history, from David Beckham to Brad Pitt, hides a peroxide bottle. And now that trend-setters like rapper G-Eazy and actor-director Jonah Hill are also getting blond, it's clear the whiteout is the point where it lies.

To spare you the embarrassment of styling fluorine ginger, we've put together the do's and don'ts of embracing your inner Eminem. This is your no-BS guide to bleaching your hair.

Will bleached hair suit me?

Older

It really is not just a number. Tried-and-true dos may be more popular than ever, but they are still a game for young men. After the late 30's – 40 in a row – the bleaching of hair is synonymous with a regrettable affair in the backseat of a Maserati that you can not afford. But if you just can not help it, opt for a steel gray that does not accentuate your age, but complements it.

skin tone

This is not suitable for the weak skin. While darker skin tones combine well with bleached blond hair (as well as lighter, even skin tones), a very light, freckled skin does not have the melanin needed to balance out the strong tones of a bleached style. Of course, there are no hard and fast rules, but it's important to know that having fair-skinned, bleached hair, like a pastel-colored polo shirt, has a very good chance of washing you out.

Hair type & hair color

The darker and thicker your hair, the harder it becomes to bleach. "Someone with fine, light natural hair should get platinum easily with one application," says Jazzy Bayoumi, stylist and men's color specialist at London hairdressers Joe & Co. "However, someone with thick, dark or curly hair may need a second application."

maintenance

Think of your general care routine. Are you basically Patrick Bateman? Or more a shit, shower and shaving shop guy? If the latter is the case, the care required to make bleached hair look optimal may prove pain in the proverbial sense. Bleaching itself can not only take several appointments, but after bleaching, your hair also requires extra TLC, including special shampoos and deep treatments.

Personal style

Going by peroxide might not be the subversive style statement it once was (shout out to Billy Idol), but that's not to say it will wash in any situation. If you have a company job in an office-friendly dress code office, bleached blond hair is probably not a good idea. Although your casual wardrobe is mainly made up of smart shirts and meaningful chinos, a less eye-catching hairstyle could be a cozy look for your aesthetics.

Before you bleach

Wash your hair

"Do this the day before you intend to bleach it, not the day before," says Bayoumi. "Washing the hair by day can make the scalp dry and sensitive, which increases the risk of bleaching irritation that could otherwise be avoided." This is especially important if you are going to do the entire root-to-tip hog, instead of just adding tips or highlights.

Hold the product

"Styling products slow down the speed at which the bleach acts on the hair, which can delay the entire process," says Bayoumi. So, no matter how Sideshow Bob your hair predisposition, come to your appointment without pomade.

Trench heat-styling tools

Straighteners and hair dryers can be tough on the hair, making it dry and brittle even before any bleach chemicals have been applied. To improve your chances of safer and more successful bleaching, swirl it out a few days before your appointment.

Cut off the chemical relaxant.

Men with Afro hair, if you are considering having your natural hair, do not chemically relax. "Chemically relaxed hair is already weak, so bleaching would only break it," says Bayoumi. This leaves you two options: Have your hair cut or wait for the relaxant to regrow.

Come prepared

Even London's best hairdressers will have a hard job magically transferring David Beckham's bonce right to yours. However, coming to your appointment with references that illustrate the look you have in mind can help the person who welds the bleach to get a better idea of ​​what you are planning. Remember, they are stylists, not miracle healers.

How to bleach your hair professionally

Ready for a newer, blond woman? Start by doing your research. Chances are, your normal barber does not offer bleach, which means you need to go to a salon. Googling before deciding who to trust your locks with.

The bleaching process itself is similar to the dyeing of hair, but often more time consuming and expensive than a simple dyeing process. Here is the summary, says award-winning hairdresser Jamie Stevens (who, by the way, is totally worthy to entrust his locks.)

Bleaching powder and activator (usually peroxide, which activates the bleaching powder) are mixed. The amount of powder needed depends on a number of factors, including hair type, hair color, and the look you're trying to achieve – roots, for example, need less than a full head.

The mixture is applied to the hair. If you have hairs that are longer than an inch or so, you should first paint the tips and middle lengths, as they take longer to develop than the roots. Once the hair is completely covered, it's time to get the bleach to work.

The color remains to unfold. This can take between 30 minutes to an hour, depending on the color of your existing hair, the strength of the peroxide used and the tone you want.

Then the hair is rinsed thoroughly with warm water and shampoo.

Toner is applied to help neutralize all brassy yellows in the hair to achieve a cool, white hue. After the application, it remains about 15-30 minutes for his work.

The toner is thoroughly rinsed from the hair and a care treatment is performed. Although not absolutely necessary, a care treatment is advisable, as it helps to repair the hair after bleaching.

NB. Bleaching is less an immediate style change than a committed lifestyle. If you want to get blonde, there's a good chance you'll have to pay your colorist at least one more visit, possibly two.

How to bleach your hair at home

Not. At least not unless you absolutely have to. "I would never recommend bleaching your hair at home," says Stevens. "Whether you've bought products on the main street or even invested in a few out of a salon, it can lead to disaster if it's not used properly and cautiously."

DIY style hair bleaching is like sleeping with someone you work with: not deadly, but seriously unreasonable. However, if you are not deterred, follow these steps to minimize the risks. And do not say we did not tell you.

If you bleach your hair at home, wear clothes that you like to ruin and always protect your hands with plastic gloves as bleach powder is strong and irritating to the skin.

It is advisable to perform a patch test first. Mix a small amount of paint and use a cotton swab to apply to the inside of your elbow. Wait at least 24 hours, if there is no irritation, you are ready.

Follow the instructions and mix the developer and the bleach powder in the correct ratio for the intended effect.

Apply the bleach to your whole head, if possible with a paintbrush. If you have medium or long hair, divide it to get as close to the roots as possible.

Allow the bleach to work for the recommended time until your hair has a light yellow color. Dark hair may require multiple treatments, but leave two weeks between each treatment to minimize the damage.

Follow with toner to get exactly the color you want before rinsing twice.

Finish the procedure with a moisturizing hair mask so that the hair does not become brittle.

Home hair bleaching products

How to care for bleached hair

Wash your hair less

Since bleach tends to free the hair and scalp of sebum (the oily substance that prevents it from drying out), it is worth skipping a wash every now and then to prevent your scalp from getting irritated and yours Hair is extremely dry and brittle.

Use purple shampoo and conditioner

"Blond does not fade as such, but it tends to turn a brass-gold through factors such as air pollution or chemicals in swimming pools, for example," says Bayoumi. "A good purple shampoo and conditioner helps to neutralize yellows so the hair retains its platinum shimmer for longer."

Avoid heat styling

Just as it is important to protect the straighteners and hair dryers before bleaching your hair, it is important that you avoid them as much as possible once bleached. That does not mean you have to boycott them completely, but it's worth evaluating the condition of your hair before using a trowel and remembering to use a hair dryer whenever possible in a cool place.

Use a mask or a nourishing cream.

"If your hair is longer than a short harvest, swap the purple conditioner twice a week for a nourishing conditioner to keep it strong, healthy, and beautiful," says Bayoumi.

3 bleached celebrity hairstyles to try

Do you need some bleach? We asked Joe & Co's Bayoumi to rate some of the best celebrity styles and find out why they work.

Zac Efron

"The platinum blonde effect here really shows the silhouette of the split hairstyle by Zac Efron. It also complements his blue eyes and the naturally cooler tones of his facial hair. "

Zayn Malik

"Thanks to his complexion, Zayn Malik is as suitable for warm, blonde tones as it is for cool ones. Here is his hair color somewhere in between. The tone of his hair is warm, but it also has a distinctive iridescent finish. "

Miles plate

"Miles Teller's hair here is perfect for someone who wants to get blond but does not want to commit to much care. The warmer, golden tone at the roots matches well with its eye color and skin tone and will not crash hard with the natural color of its hair as it grows out. The ends, which are bleached lighter, make a nice contrast and brilliantly emphasize the texture of the style. "

Blond ambition: how to bleach your hair