#idk I think it’s made worse because like while I’m not busy not I use to work and be busy and still tried to create time to keep in contact | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

hearts4leeknow · 2 months

Text

pushed away || lee minho (leeknow) x reader

Warning(s): no comfort (at least not in this part), hurtful words unrequited love uses of y/n (pls im sorry idk what leeknow is supposed to call reader) SWEARING!!!

Genre: angst

Summary: you two have been bffs since forever, you two know everything about each other. well not everything.

minho has yet to tell you about the fat crush he has on you, he’s scared it’ll ruin everything so he thinks pushing you away will solve this situation, but it only makes it worse. he ends up loosing his bff the one he loves in the process.

leeknow x reader

!!LOWERCASE INTENDED!!

a/n: just got a random idea based on nothing!

you and leeknow were inseparable, you two told each other everything… well maybe not everything.

what he didn’t tell you is that he liked you, like was an understatement, more like love you. of course he couldn’t tell you what if it ruined years of friendship, what if it makes it awkward what if he gets rejected. he hated rejection and he can’t bare loosing such a precious bond. his feelings for you only surfaced a few months ago, he realized he liked- no loved you when he had gotten extremely sick due to sweating and performing in the rain making him super weak and unable to walk properly due to dizziness. so you took care of him, everyday made him food and soup, tried to make his sick days less cloudy and more sunny, and it worked. you made his worst days still feel happy, that’s when he fell for you and oh boy he fell hard. how was he supposed to handle this, now he gets flustered every time you speak to him he can’t continue like this and he can’t just tell you what if-

“minho hyung” han snapped his fingers in front of minho’s face.

“hi” is all he responded with.

“you were zoning out think about…?” han questioned curious of what his hyung was thinking about.

“oh nothing just spacing out cause you’re to boring” he lied with one of his snarky remarks.

“rude!! i am not boring” han pouted while he flopped onto the couch. you walked in talking to felix.

“min!” you smiled seeing your best friend seated on the couch.

“hi y/n” he returned the smile. felix sat down next to han as those two talked you and leeknow had your own conversation flowing.

oh how leeknow was struggling to keep his composure, you looked so cute in the tight short sleeved shirt with baggy cargos. he felt his face heating up but he was good at hiding it.

“min? are you okay you’re spacing out” you looked concerned and confused. minho usually tells you what’s wrong immediately because he knows he can’t hide it from you, but today he just shook his head.

“min, are you sure you don’t wanna talk about it?” you asked feeling a little hurt that he didn’t want to tell you what was wrong, but you knew if it was something personal you couldn’t force it out.

“i’m just not ready to tell you yet” minho mumbled with a slight frown, he could tell you were upset by it.

“it’s okay take your time” you give him a light smile trying to make him feel at ease. little did you know this would be one of the last real convos you would have with him.

—— 🎀 ——

you 🌷: minnie we haven’t hung out in a while! movie night?

min 🐈: i cant im sorry

you 🌷: how come? we barely hangout anymore..

min 🐈: busy

you 🌷: minho cmon you’ve been saying you’re ‘busy’ for weeks now, what’s wrong?

min 🐈: nothing just want time for myself

you 🌷: ok…

you switched off your phone and flopped down onto your bed.

he’s been ‘busy’ for weeks and he’s saying he wants time to himself but he’s had 3 weeks for that

you thought, you knew there was no way he was just busy or wanted time to himself. wouldn’t he have told you what’s up so you don’t worry? does he not want anything to do with you anymore because he finds being friends with you is embarrassing? it hurt to think about it, now what if that’s what he wanted?

no, it can’t be.

that’s what you kept telling yourself but at the 3 week mark it wasn’t working anymore, you kept getting worried and you felt helpless. you’ve had enough and so you called him…

—— 🎀 ——

ring ring ring…

he picked up his phone seeing your photo as the banner with your name ‘y/n (my love💞)’ he read and he answered.

“minho!” you screeched

“what!” he mirrored the energy

“tell me what’s wrong please? i know it’s not just that your busy or need time to yourself, please!” you begged and pleaded for him to tell you, he wanted to tell you trust me he just didn’t know how.

“i can’t” he didn’t dare say more than that, your pleading voice broke him but what else was he supposed to do?

“minho, i feel like i’ve been pushed to the side by my best friend since childhood, we barley hangout together your always ‘busy’. you’re not telling me something, please?” your voice broke mid sentence, you were at your breaking point.

“no, i can’t always hangout with you! i have a busy idol life unlike you.” minho spewed out in an instant not realizing his words until after.

“what the fuck? minho, im busy too but i always make time for you.” you frown when you hear him lash out.

“whatever, your annoying and just a distraction to me anyways” minho scoffs.

“im-im annoying? ive been your best friend for who knows how long, i’ve always been there for you and now im annoying and just a distraction? wow, i thought you were different, minho. i’ve been trying to drop hints that i like you! but i guess all i am to you is a distraction.” you spill out all the emotions that were inside of me, you were hurt and felt betrayed. “i dont think i wanna talk to you after this.” you say my voice was quiet.

“wait-wait, y/-“ you hung up before minho could finish talking.

——🎀——

as soon as you hung up everything came crashing down on him.

you liked him?

he thought, you liked him back and he ruined everything with his attitude and harsh words. hes hurt the love of his life, how is he supposed to get you back after such words left his mouth? angry tears trickled down his face, this anger wasn’t directed to you though, it was directed to himself. hes messed up, and hes messed up bad.

——FIN——

a/n: i dont know why i decided to post this sosososoossoo late!! im so sorry i havent been active, i havent been feeling well lately. but i promise ill have more stuff up soon! 🤞🏻🤞🏻💞

a/n: @sona1800 IVE LEFT MY POOKS WAITING FOR TOO LONG, im so sorry bby you waited to long and it’s not even that good. i hope you still some what like it 💞💞 (lemme know if i should make a pt2 and if i should make it angst or fluffy 👀👀)

77 notes · View notes

frechiiie · 2 years

Text

alright, so here’s the deal since I need to come clean with y’all

I’m paying off my 2021 year taxes since I owed them money and stuff, I made a payment plan with TurboTax and shit and I’ve already made 2 payments out of 4. I’ve been paying that pack easy and on time; no issues there. However, I got a letter from the irs saying I was 2 months late on my payments (which I wasn’t) apparently I made the payments in the wrong year or section?? I have no fucking clue tbh; I thought I was paying it right but apparently not. BUT luckily the 2 payments I made were still under my name and social but they were unclaimed. I gave them a call to sort it out and got the 2 payments back to the balance of where it should’ve gone! I was firm to tell them I was already in a payment plan (I have them the 2 last dates on the other 2 payments I need to do) and we AGREED to stick by it. All is good, I thought I sorted it out. I got another letter confirming it and everything. Awesome!

Then yesterday I got YET another letter from the irs, basically they want me to pay the full remaining balance (aka: 3.5k) by AUGUST 28th of next month. So uh, I’m a little stressed out and anxious about that because idk about y’all but I literally do not have 3,500 dollars. IF I DID…I WOULD’VE PAID IT OFF.

So now I have to wait for the 4th to pass so I can give them a call and ask them why they decided to fully charge me the rest by that date instead of the payment plan we agreed on. If worst comes to worst; they’re going to tell me it’s all due on august with no exceptions. And if it is, I’m literally screwed. Because I do NOT have that kind of money.

Part of me wants to open comms but I literally can’t, my body will not handle that kind of pressure with what I already have on my shoulders. I would take like maybe 2 comms but I deadass doubt anyone would even pay 100 dollars for my art. It’s not that good enough unless it’s a comic and right now? I don’t wanna be doing comic comms. No way.

And what’s worse is that I haven’t paid for shipping on the other plush orders that are done (sun, moon and teddy Freddy and Gregory) as-well as gotten the bulk order on the keychain plushies finalized because the met amount hasn’t been reached yet. I honestly wanted to cry because I felt like a complete failure,

I am not nor will I ever use the money for shipping to make any other purchases than what they are intended for, that would be irresponsible of me to do so. That money was from you guys for me to ship your orders and that will NOT be touched.

My friends lightly suggested that I upped my princess on the plushies because they cost a lot more to produce and ship, and they’re right but if I charged more then they won’t be affordable and won’t make much sales, I’m thinking after the keychain plushies I should just go back to sticking with chains, pins and stickers. BUT what I will do is charge the keychain plushies from 30 to 40 dollars because I sold my blueberry plush for 40 so it’s only fair.

I wouldn’t be struggling too much if I knew what I was doing as a small business owner but since I’m new to it I practically don’t know what I’m doing. I’ve been suggested to look for other stuff that I can do for me to make a profit while not spending too much. And target stuff I know will sell well.

But right now? I gotta go as planned, so I am begging for help.

Please please let’s try to get the stuff on my shop sold out for me (if possible), you can share to whoever you want and purchase whatever you see of interest in my shop! And if you can leave a tip that’ll help a lot!

And if you can’t buy anything on my shop, that’s okay! You can also buy me a Kofi or two! ANYTHING helps!

I’m trying to prepare for the worst, I just hope that’s not the case but I’m deadass loosing my grip. so PLEASE PLEASE help me in any way you can if you want!

The goal for my stuff is to make others happen with stuff that I create, art is something I love to do and want to make a career out of, and your support would mean a lot! Thanks!

I’ll update y’all on what happens after I give the damn irs a call on Tuesday. In the meantime, im gonna try not to spiral. Links to my Kofi, Shop and even Paypal are down below! Thank you!

https://ko-fi.com/frechiiie/shop

https://ko-fi.com/frechiiie

https://www.paypal.me/Frecher

#txt #i feel pathetic for typing this but I have to come clean #please help me out! it would mean a lot if you want me to continue what I do and wanna support what I do

2K notes · View notes

baahsu · 1 year

Text

Thinking about a vinsmoke siblings au where after judge mysteriously ends up at the bottom of the ocean sanji and reiju send 124-ji to the baratie so they can learn how to be more human (reiju will be keeping close tabs on them, obviously)

Zeff's surprised when he sees them at first and immediately goes "wtf there're three more eggplants??" but the three fit right in because you know, their main language is violence.

Obviously they're forced to tone it way down, zeff, patty and carne always hit them in the head or kick them while telling them to stay in line

Zeff sometimes writes to sanji to give him updates, it goes something like:

"The red eggplant seems to despise being around people, but he's good with numbers so he's taking care of our finances. He's saving us a lot of money and idk if it's because he's threatening our suppliers or if he's just that good at striking deals."

"The green eggplant seems to be mostly indifferent to people, but customers are scared of him and he's tried to pick fights with them because of it. He makes a good bouncer, though."

"The blue eggplant is the worse with people, but he showed a mild interest in cooking after walking around and claiming everything here is boring and stupid (I gave him another thump on the head for that btw). I let him into the kitchen under strict supervision, but so far he's only managed to destroy half of it in frustration. Patty and carne are keeping an even closer watch on him and the red eggplant made him pay for all of the repairs."

"Your sister steps by sometimes to see how the three are doing and it's always an event when she does. Patrons love her, her presence is definitely something, but she killed a guy the other day for looking at her wrong. It hurt business for a while. She apologized for it on her next visit, but I'm not sure if she really meant it."

And sanji stares at the letters and wonders if maybe he should've thrown his brothers to the bottom of the ocean too. But everything considered, it could've been way worse, 124-ji are doing better than expected and he's satisfied enough with it

[ I thought of this a while ago and actually wrote a fic for it too 😅 ]

#vinsmoke siblings #vinsmoke brothers #sanji #red leg zeff #vinsmoke niji #vinsmoke ichiji #vinsmoke yonji #vinsmoke reiju #one piece #one piece headcanons #vinsmokes headcanons

386 notes · View notes

dobs · 1 year

Text

this is a slightly doctored screenshot from when i made the local news for yellin at some cops while wearing my sweet ‘DEFUND THE POLICE’ t-shirt.

tl;dr: attend community meetings! yell at cops! shame those that are up to no good and do it in public!

context: my local pd announced a period for public commentary regarding planned expansions to their drone surveillance policy (!). a citizen group partnered with the police to host a meeting for community members to learn about the policy and provide feedback.

this, to me, seemed like an excellent opportunity to yell at some cops and maybe even prevent an already Not Good policy from getting Even Worse, so i went.

some additional context: i am new to town so i didn’t recognize the address of the event. i figured it was at like city hall or somewhere .. ‘neutral’ ? .. if that makes sense.

nope.

it was held at the center of a sprawling campus where they must do all the Serious Police Business or whatever it is they do when they’re not out in public killing minorities and family pets. cool.

even more, even better additional context: i showed up expecting, idk, like an auditorium Q&A setting where i could air my grievances in relative anonymity.

nope.

that. shit. was. i n t i m a t e.

i was the last to arrive and maybe 10 out of 30 seats were taken, so i picked an open seat next to some guy and sat down. two minutes later when he stood up to start the meeting i realized that, in addition to being just some guy, he was also the chief of police. coolcoolcoolcool.

the good news is my wardrobe and seating choices meant that the chief of police almost certainly noticed the sick grim reaper at the center of my ‘DEFUND THE POLICE’ shirt (a perfect shirt for any occasion btw, not just for yellin’ at cops).

the bad news is my shirt got cropped out of the news footage. oh and it turns out that they have absolutely zero obligation to actually incorporate feedback which gave the meeting this bizarro, almost performative vibe.

it’s.. it’s almost like wolves explaining to sheep that the sheep’s tax dollars are going to be used to fund a high-tech arial surveillance program that totally can’t be abused thanks to the Very Good Policy the wolves wrote to protect the sheep’s rights.

.. or, because cops don’t deserve to be compared to Cool Things like wolves, maybe it’s more like a cop explaining to a donut that the donut’s tax dollars are going to be used to fund a high-tech arial surveillance program that totally can’t be abused thanks to the Very Good Policy the cops wrote to protect the donut’s rights.

or something like that. i don’t know, i’m new to this and not very good yet. but i think that’s the point!

showing up and using your voice, even if you have no idea what you’re doing, is so, so, soo important.

seriously. just do it! don’t think too hard! just show up and start yellin’. it’s almost as good as therapy and it’s totally free!

#story time #yellin at cops #acab #defund the police #drone surveillance #policy #privacy #oversight #irl #real life #activism #long reads #long post #me

158 notes · View notes

s1lly-gh02tz · 6 months

Text

Ok here’s me talking about spamton (my headcanons and shit)

So I do really like the theory where Spamton was thrown into the acid pool. I feel it went down like Spamton didn’t pay rent for a hot minute because of his business completely failing and eventually closing. For this point in time he was just slowly losing grasp of himself. As he kept trying and trying to get that phone call back, ever time there wasn’t a response he would just lose more and more of his sanity. Queen was friends with Spamton so obviously she gave him time. Eventually she got sick of it and lost patience, inevitably throwing him into the acid lake. I think it would be extra sad if it was one of the swatchlings or maybe even Swatch that threw him in so queen won’t get her hands dirty.

Once he went into the lake he tried swimming out but obviously failed. The acid made him really short. He was always pretty short compared to everyone but the Acid really didn’t help. The acid also like melted away his skin, eventually revealing a harder, puppet skin kinda thing if you know what I mean? His mouth sort of got stuck in a nutcracker kinda thing? Like he can’t move his mouth up or down. However he can move like his cheeks and upper lip, allowing him to slightly smile or frown

Like that(it’s shitty cause I’m in the car)

Once he got out of the lake after a while, he crawled out of the castle (it was probably night at the time so he wasn’t caught). He couldn’t walk because he was in a lot of pain. He stayed at a dumpster(obviously) for the night and eventually just decided to stay in them.

Now once he was able to walk and move around again, he started walking around the back streets of Cyber City and just started digging through the trash. Doing this, he found the outfit he wears in game. It was filled with holes so he patched it up with other things he found.

Eventually he snuck back into the mansion somehow, remembering the Neo body. I’m not up to date on the lore for what exactly happened so I don’t have much for this but I have one thing. Spamton found the glasses he wears at Swatches shop or somewhere in the castle. He thought maybe he could try and disguise himself but one he was short and the acid did not help. He did still alter his appearance to look more like swatch to get to the Neo body, which obv failed.

I also really like the idea of him always having that voice thing where he blurts out random advertisements, however it gets worse when he isn’t himself or just not feeling well. When he was with the other Addisons he was very quiet and shy, partly because of this. He used to really hate it and when he became successful he was so scared of messing up on interviews and commercials. The addisons (specifically Pink) would joke about this, which would get under his skin. However (of course I’m putting spamvil in this) Jevil found it kinda cool. He had an interesting way of speaking himself so he found the advertisements kinda cute.

Speaking of Jevil i wanna talk about him too. I picture him and Spamton meeting like this. Spamton takes a drive to just idk get away from stuff and his car breaks down. He does know how to fix it but he doesn’t have the tools on him bc why would he. He’s trying to call someone but the signal sucks because they don’t really use phones there. He’s super frustrated so he just walks away. Jevil just happened to be hanging around doing whatever and he saw Spamton. At first Spamton was like “what the fuck”. He asked if there were any places where he could get his car fixed and Jevil was just like 🤷‍♂️. Spamton was very annoyed and frustrated so Jevil just took him around the kingdom to pass time until the morning. The two became ‘friends’ after this but Spamton def had something for Jevil. When the morning came Spamton was finally able to get a hold of someone and he left the kingdom. However because they’re friends now Jevil and Spamton wrote to eachother to communicate. Once they became closer and Jevil visited Cyber city more and more Jevil got a phone and was able to talk to spamton easier.

Also if you’re curious about what happened between them just check out the Spamvil comic I made🤑.

Now getting to the divorce. All of what I just said happened before Spamton was thrown into the acid. Now because both of them went insane for separate reasons, they probably had a fight caused by that and just decided it would be best to separate. This happened right when Spamton started losing everything after he didn’t get the phone call back.

HOWEVER. they do get back together eventually. I do NOT want spamton or Jevil dying after their boss fights. I made a separate post about this before but after Spamton’s boss fight he lived in the castle with Ralsei and the others. He became really good friends with Ralsei and helped him decorate and paint the rooms. (I’ve said this a million times before but I hc spamton as an artist) Eventually Ralsei found Jevil because he didn’t move in after his boss fight (he was hangin around doing his own thing for a bit). Ralsei didn’t tell Spamton who was moving in so when Spamton had finished his room he was just shocked to see him.

It basically went like this. Spamton was finishing up painting his room and he heard the door open. Ralsei was just showing Jevil his room, unaware the two knew eachother. Both of them were just shocked. Ralsei was confused but Jevil had asked for him to just wait outside for a bit. The two awkwardly talked for a minute. Because they separated at such a strange time and now that they were in better places and not entirely unstable, they missed eachother. They talked it out and set up a time to just work things out.

Eventually they did and then they kissed and all is well🥳🥳

Edit: Here’s some stuff about his time with the Addison bc I forgor :3

While Spamton lived with the Addison he was closest to Blue. He was the nicest to Spamton and helped him as much as he could. Spamton and Pink probably had the worst relationship. Pink was kind of an ass to Spamton just because he knew Spamton was doing anything for his company and was kind of just really bad at his job.

Spamton helped the Addison with things like keeping track of numbers and advertisements. I headcanon that Spamton is really good with math so he can help the Addison’s with numbers stuff. He also draws many advertisements for all of them because he’s an artist.

When Spamton became successful, Pink was the first to ditch him. Then it was yellow. Then orange. But it took a while for Blue. He stuck with him. He was friends with him. But spamton grew greedy and kind of rude. He only ever focused on his business. He never had time for anything else. It was all he ever talked about. Blue cared about him but he couldn’t do it anymore. After a fight, blue ditched him and Spamton officially had no friends. He had Jevil but we all know how that ended up☹️

When Spamton is not entirely insane anymore and after everything happens he meets up with the Addisons again and tries to fix their friendship. Eventually everyone, even Pink, forgives him and they’re all friends now. Spamton still helps them out with advertisements and numbers just like he used to🥳

Okay so that’s basically it!! Really enjoyed writing this and I’ll update is as soon as I come up with something new!!

43 notes · View notes

softbobamilktae · 2 years

Text

Pretty Girl

Pairing: Idol!Taehyung x Model!OC

Genre: fluff

Word Count: 2.8k

Warnings: body insecurities...like a lot of them, and probably slightly suggestive? They directly mention sex at one point idk

Summary: Zelda's stuggling with liking herself again, and Tae makes it his personal mission to make her feel better. Cue twenty minutes of him just loving on her.

Some days, time seemed to tick by slowly when Zelda sat at home. She was used to the crammed and busy hours of the modeling workday, so the single task of taking care of a household – or condo, in this case – was simply hard for her to get used to. Dinner didn’t take all day to make, so what was she supposed to do with her time? Most of the rest of the girls worked or were otherwise busy taking care of their own places, and in the case of Astrid, she still lived on the other side of the world. So, what was Zelda to do with her time?

On top of all of this, she had two burdens hanging over her head. She’d gained weight, which despite what Tae told her, she was still mightily insecure about because of how she’d been chastised for it before. Despite this, she still wanted to model. She missed modeling. It fed some innate hunger in her for positive attention, and in the years she’d spent in the industry, she’d concluded that the only way to do that was through her looks.

It was silly, really. She had lots of friends who adored her, but every time she made a new friend, she feared they’d leave her. Even Tae. She knew deep down that she’d found some real friends, but it had been a long time running that she’d been told she was too ‘odd’ to be friends with. She’d tried to dial down her personality for a while, but she’d realized that felt worse than people telling her she was weird. So, she was back to square one. The fear of losing friends while simultaneously being unwilling to sacrifice herself.

On the bright side, clothes could always mend an aching heart. For her, at least. That didn’t really mean buying clothes, though. It meant going to all the high-end stores and trying things on just because she could. Of course, she could’ve bought them, but she’d always been a bit of a nitpick when it came to clothes she’d actually wear. Sure, she’d model clothes of all sorts, but when it came to everyday life, there was a very small selection of things she felt comfortable in.

This only meant one thing – Tae’s phone was always pinging with new photos she’d taken in the dressing room.

“Hate the texture, but it’s pretty at least.

“I wouldn’t wear this out of the house, but maybe for you?” paired with a winking emoji.

“I might buy this one. Pretty flowers, right?

“I think this one would look better on you, honestly.

“Date night?

“This one says I’m stealing your jacket by the end of the night.

“I hate sequins. Hate.

“I think this one would look better over a swimsuit than as an actual dress?

“Again, stealing your jacket.

“What do you think of this one?”

Tae smiled after picking up his phone and scrolling through all the messages.

“You look pretty in all of them, sweetheart. Are you going to buy any of them?”

“I bought four of them. The price tag on the last one made me want to cry, but it was too pretty.”

“You shopping for that photoshoot we talked about doing?”

“Haha…no. I got bored this afternoon. I’m running out of time-consuming dishes to make.”

“I see. We need to have a baby soon so you have less time on your hands.”

“Tae!”

“I’m kidding. Unless…?

“I’m coming home in half an hour. We have a date with my camera, ok?”

Zelda grinned at her phone. He was so persistent.

“Ok. See you then.”

◇◆◇◆◇

There was something different about being styled when your husband was the one pinching at your sides and setting his hands on your shoulders to turn you towards the mirror, but Zelda wasn’t sure what was so different about it.

“All right, what do you think? Pretty enough to walk the runway?”

Zelda grinned at her reflection in the mirror. “Definitely. I don’t recognize this dress, though? Where did you get it?”

He shrugged, pulling his tie off as he walked towards their closet. “I bought it on my way home. I thought I should pick something out for you to wear if we’re going to do an actual photoshoot.”

“Oh,” Zelda breathed before looking at herself in the mirror again. The man had great taste. It was a mostly white dress, and it was flowy in all the right places while still keeping her shape. “It covers my belly well.”

Tae popped his head out of the closet and looked over her frame. “You’re right. It does. I erred when picking that out, then.”

She laughed, a bit embarrassed. “What do you mean?”

“Well, I think your stomach is cute. I shouldn’t have bought something that hid it so well.”

He stated it as if it were something obvious, and then he went back to digging through their closet for his own outfit.

“Tae, I told you before that you don’t need to lie to me.” Her voice dropped to a whisper. “It’s ok….”

“Of course, I don’t. I’m not going to lie to you and say that I don’t like how soft your belly is. I’m not going to say that you don’t make the best pillow and that I don’t enjoy just patting your stomach. Didn’t you tell me once that you liked it better when I didn’t have abs? So why should it be any different for me?”

She hummed. “I don’t know. I just don’t particularly like the way I look, so I don’t see how you do either.”

He emerged from the closet a moment later, pulling his shirt on as he did so. “I find you very attractive.” He came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, resting his head against hers. “Look at that pretty girl in the mirror. Those pretty eyes. This pretty nose,” he tapped her nose. “And these pretty lips.” He kissed her cheek, being in such a position that he couldn’t kiss her on the lips. He poked her sides next. “And look at this pretty body. I know girls who would love to have your body. There’s something here for me to hold onto, too.” He squeezed her waist then. “What’s not to love?”

She smiled shyly at him. “I….”

“Sweetheart, I don’t understand what you don’t like here.”

She shrugged. “I dunno. Everything? My chest is too big, my hips are too wide. You already know I don’t like my stomach.”

He leaned closer to her, this time nibbling on the shell of her ear. “And I’m sure you know how much I like that you’ve gained weight. You weren’t eating enough before, sweetheart. That’s why you were so tiny. And that’s not good. You know that, right?”

She nodded hesitantly, tears biting her eyes.

“Don’t you remember how bad you felt then?” He nuzzled his nose in her hair, doing his best to not sound like he was chastising her. “You were always crying. You didn’t feel good, I know you didn’t. Was that really worth it to have that body?”

“No,” she admitted quietly. She was staring at the floor now as she played with her fingers. “I like how much better I feel now.”

“Mhm. I bet you do. Anything else you’ve noticed has changed?”

She shrugged. “I’m happier now.”

“Are you?”

She nodded. “Part of it is because I don’t feel so lonely anymore, but most of it is because I’m not starving all the time.”

“Do you enjoy that?”

“Yeah.”

“Another thing?”

She cleared her throat, still avoiding eye contact with him. “It hurts less to sit down.”

He chuckled quietly. “It hurt before?”

“Yeah. I didn’t have enough cushioning….”

“Anything else?”

She hesitated. “I don’t know.”

“That’s ok. Can I ask another thing?”

She glanced up at him in the mirror. “Yeah.”

“How do you feel about your looks now?”

She settled her eyes on her own figure this time, and she had to admit how warm inside it made her feel to have Tae cradling her against his chest, no matter how embarrassed she was that he had to have this conversation with her.

“I…can you talk about what you like again?”

“You name something you like first.”

“Um…I have pretty arms?”

He nodded, reaching up to squeeze one of said arms. “You do.”

“You say something now,” she requested quietly.

“Hmm…” his fingers ghosted over her body as they traveled up and down for a few moments. Finally, he settled his fingers against her stomach and wiggled them ever so softly, making her squirm. “I still think your belly is so pretty.” He smiled. “Ok. Your turn again.”

She settled her hands over his to keep him from tickling her again as she considered herself.

“My hair is nice.”

“Oh, it definitely is.” He buried his nose in her hair again. “Such pretty curls you have here.”

She giggled.

“I know you said you don’t like your chest…but I like it.” He lowered his voice. “A lot.”

She poked at his hands that were still settled around her waist. “You just like squishing me, don’t you? I see your goal here.”

He grinned. “You caught me. I like having a soft and squishy wife.” This prompted more waist squeezing from those fingers of his. “Ok. You’ve gotta say something else you like now.”

She sighed. “Do I have to?”

“Zel….”

“Ok, ok, ok. Fine. Um.” She stared at herself for a long spell of time, this time taking notice of the things that Tae had pointed out. She had to admit that while she didn’t like them, she did like how much he did. It felt so right for him to enjoy those parts of her that she wasn’t even upset that they were there anymore.

She finally cleared her throat. “I like my eyes.”

He nodded, as if her observation had been the most obvious one in the world. “Another one now.”

She pouted. “You’re not going to say one?”

“Nope. I need you to say another one first.”

She seemed slightly agitated by this, furrowing her eyebrows as she stared at herself again. A few moments passed before she shook her head. “I don’t know, Tae.”

“Ok. Just look at yourself as a whole. You’re pretty, right?”

“I…am.” She reasoned finally. “Just…not as pretty as I feel like I should be.”

“What can we do to fix that?”

“Makeup…would help.”

“Would it?”

She nodded, feeling less insecure about her body now and more about her face.

“And after we fix that, will we need to fix something else?”

She hesitated. “I don’t know. I…I don’t think I’m going to be 100% happy with myself by the end of the day no matter what we do, Tae.”

He hummed, resting his lips against the crown of her head. “How about we stop looking in the mirror for now, then? We can head out and take some pictures, and I can do all the looking at you.”

She smiled softly. “Ok. I think I’d like that.”

◇◆◇◆◇

She loved it even more than she’d expected to. Tae, ever her hype man, was convinced that she looked absolutely stunning from every angle, and despite the fact that she knew she’d disagree with him once she saw the photos, she let his words make her feel good anyways.

Before they left, she’d insisted on taking a few of him, too. He was always gorgeous, especially today with all the kind words he’d fed her heart. Maybe she needed a little something to remind her someday of everything he’d said today.

“See, look at that one,” he grinned, showing her one of the photos he’d taken as they walked back to their car. “Stunning. It’s a wonder how I got to marry someone so beautiful.”

And she had to admit…she absolutely glowed in the photo. He’d been saying something to her when he’d taken the photo, she knew that much. Whatever it had been, it had made her light up like the noonday sun. She had the biggest grin on her face, and the lighting was doing her all sorts of favors.

Tae grabbed her hand and swung it as they walked along. “This is fun. We should do this more often.” He glanced down at her. “I especially love having you as my muse.”

She smiled, her face flushing. She didn’t even know what to say to everything he was saying today. He was just full of sweet things to say today, and it was making her bones melt. She knew how amazed he was that he’d gotten to marry her, but she felt even more privileged than he.

The compliments didn’t stop once they got home that evening. They’d run out of time to make dinner, so the two of them sat on the couch eating takeout. He’d insisted that she sit on his lap while they ate despite how this complicated things, and then the two of them had headed to their bedroom just to lounge around for the night. The two of them had ended up in barely any clothes as they prepared for bed, and this led to even more compliments spilling from Tae’s lips.

“Look at this pretty tummy.” He buried his face against said tummy.

She giggled, rubbing her fingers over his scalp. “I love you, Tae.”

He grinned, turning to look up at her. “I love you too.” He patted her hip.

“You’re very touchy today.”

“Well, my wife is feeling insecure about her body, and I need to let her know that I think it is a very pretty body.”

“You think so?”

He gave an “mhm” that sounded more like a purr, making her giggle again. “What do you think about making a baby tonight?”

“I dunno, Tae…do we really need one of those right now?”

“I think so. I’m looking forward to a miniature you running around our place. We’ve gotta have someone to fill these bedrooms.”

She laughed. “I think the likelihood of any of our babies looking like me is very low.”

“Nah. If we have enough of them, surely at least one of them will look like you.”

“I don’t know about that.”

“We won’t know until we try.”

This earned another laugh from her. “Do you actually want to make a baby, or do you just want to have sex?”

He clearly had already thought about this, because his answer was immediate. “Both.”

“I see how it is.”

The two of them were silent for a few moments before Zelda spoke again. “Thank you for today. You made me feel a lot better.”

“Did I?”

“Mhm. You made me feel very pretty today. I haven’t felt that way in a long while.”

“Really?” he asked, frowning. “I need to compliment you more often, then.”

She shook her head. “It’s ok. Today you just…it was so nice, Tae. Thank you.”

He lifted his head off her stomach before climbing to the top of the bed so that he could lean over her.

“You know I always think you’re beautiful, right?”

She stared up at him. “I know. You’ve made that very apparent, even if not with words.”

“Good. I always want to make sure you know. I married such a pretty girl; I can’t just let her forget how pretty she is.”

She reached up and cupped his face in her hands, rubbing her thumbs over his cheekbones. “And I married the most darling man.” She was close to tears now. “You make me feel so adored, Tae. Thank you.”

He grinned and pressed a gentle kiss to her lips. “You don’t need to thank me. You’re so easy to adore.”

That was all it took to get the tears flowing. “Am I?”

“Definitely. You’re the most adore-able person in the world.”

She grinned widely, trying to ignore the tears streaming down her temples. He reached up and brushed one of those tears away before tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear.

“You’re so, so pretty. I don’t know how someone didn’t snatch you up before me.”

“None of them were you,” she replied simply. “No one wanted me, but you did. You wanted the grumpy girl who would barely talk to you.”

“Of course,” he nodded. “You were the one girl who didn’t put on a show for me. You were just you, no matter who I was.”

She smiled, pulling him in for another kiss. “You wanna make that baby now?”

This is part of the Dad!BTS series that can be found here

A/N: and hence…Zoro was born. Ahahaha I spent like 98% of this fic melting into the carpet so excuse me while I go attempt to reform myself or however you treat melted candle wax.

It would be greatly appreciated if you reblogged the story if you liked it!

Taglist: @jiminie-and-his-pinky-finger @jinnie-forthe-winnie @thornedswan @kookstempo @fly-you-dam-fools @aianloveseven @armys-dna

123 notes · View notes

armando-triplepapito · 6 months

Note

Seeing your posts about the first episodes and everyone was so mean to Betty since always, and that’s only taking into account the instances where she actually heard or saw people treating her horribly or calling her ugly and whatnot, but they were even worse behind her back (Mario and even Armando lbr especially at the early stages of their affair) and when Armando dresses as a drag queen and Betty takes him to her house to help him get rid of the make up and stuff just as he is leaving he asks her if it’s really that horrible to work at Ecomoda. Dude, do you really need to ask that? 😪 At least, he has time to reflect later because when they want Betty to help them get out of debt by keeping the embargo, Armando says that if she doesn’t want to help them it won’t be because of the things that were said to her during the board meeting, but because of the things that were said to her repeatedly before that and during her whole time working there (All the things Daniel said to Betty when she had her first makeover? He’s gross). The Human Resources department at Ecomoda was simply nonexistent.

If María Beatriz que was not a Valencia, they would treat her just as bad as they did with El Cuartel tbh

Thank you for your gifs, your blog is awesome 😎

Yea it’s rough to see how everyone treats Betty and like how you said they’re even worse when they talk behind her back. They even call her names right after she saves their skin! Calling her Murciélago 🦇 de la Guarda and whatnot. Like bruh she’s doing all she can to help you guys yet y’all can’t compliment her without an insult?! Seriously! They’re dickheads! And the worst part is that Betty probably hears them all the time yet pretends she doesn’t cause let’s not forget the walls are thin in Ecomoda 🫠. (Okay side note- there’s this scene where Armando and Mario are trash talking about her and she trips into the office, I feel like she heard them but of course used her “clumsiness” to brush over the situation if that makes sense? Definitely gonna talk about that later in a post once I rewatch the scene). Anyways when I’m reminded of Armando asking Betty if it’s that horrible to work for him it seriously makes me laugh! That’s not something he should be asking! He KNOWS he’s awful 😀 I think Betty only tells him that Don Hermes heard him yelling at her on the day she made him a business proposal (or something like that, tbh when they talk stuff about the company everything goes over my head) what she should’ve mentioned is that Don Hermes heard him yelling at her on the day he FIRED HER!! Bro that scene made me soo mad! The way Armando didn’t even wanna listen to her, insulting her basically saying that if he has to have a useless secretary might as well only keep Patricia like ugh you dumbass!! How dare you!! I kinda have wished she didn’t made that business proposal for him cause he didn’t deserve it! And the worst part is that right after he told Betty to go take a lunch break he basically tells Mario he did notice that Betty was limping but he just didn’t cared! Ugh!! Idk how Betty was able to handle all that abuse! F Armando man! Betty shouldn’t had helped them not because of what was said to her during the board meeting but ALSO because of what they did and said to her before, during her time in Ecomoda! For sure Betty is stronger than me, I would’ve been so petty😮‍💨 honestly I kinda liked how Armando read Betty’s diary, he deserved to know exactly how Betty felt during her stay in Ecomoda. I loved how he felt her pain through those pages☺️ tho I wished Betty had reminded him how he fired her😒

Don’t even remind me of Daniel during Betty’s first makeover! He was such an asshole for no reason! My poor Betty 🤧 trying to defend herself😭 and now that I think about it, it was brave of her to stand up to him while she was basically cornered cause let’s not forget he attacked her while they were alone who knows what could’ve happened if Armando didn’t appear 😰. I have to admit Armando was such a sweetheart in this episode 🥹 the way he defended her not only from Daniel but from Marcela and Patricia those bitches so kudos for him but not many cause he was still trash talking behind her back with Mario😠

Seriously! Hr was definitely nonexistent in Ecomoda! The way the executives got away with everything is crazy! How Mario played with Patricia and Aura Maria, Hugo’s insults towards the Cuartel especially towards Betty, the way Marcela tried firing Betty and how she probably fired a lot of models (probably without good reasons other than they slept with Armando). There was just so much mistreatments from the executives it’s insane! And the worst part is they never apologize not even Armando who’s the least bad one from them all. He should at least apologize after yelling at the workers 💀. Omgosh that reminds me! Okay sorry for going off track but I’m remembering that time when Armando pulled Patricia’s hair!! That was so insane of him! So scary!! Patricia is an awful person but she did not deserve to get her hair pulled by her boss!! Armando should’ve definitely been arrested there!😰 from what I understand the Cuartel had worked in Ecomoda for years, idk how they handled working in such a toxic environment 😬 but then again Don Roberto was the president so things were way different, I hope😶

Omg if Maria Beatriz was not a Valencia she would’ve been treated even worse than the Cuartel! The Cuartel were treated bad because of their appearance and Patricia was treated bad cause she’s an airhead. Maria Beatriz was not only ugly but also an airhead! Everyone would’ve eaten her alive! She’s lucky that she was born a Valencia but even still I feel like everyone pushes her to the sidelines. I feel like her family and the Mendozas try to forget she even exists💀

Hehe thanks for the kind words🙈❤️ I’ll try to make more gifs but tbh I’m kinda in a hiatus on my rewatch cause it’s kinda hard to see Betty being mistreated by everyone. Everyone is so cruel to her and I’m only 10 episodes in! Just thinking about what’s to come breaks my heart😭 but Ik it’s worth it I just need more time to mentally prepare myself. Also I’m thinking of making some fanart! Idk how to draw but if I can’t do fanfics might as well do some fanart! So watch out for them😜 and hey you never know! Maybe my fanart can inspire talented artist to make some of their own for the fandom 🤭🤪 anyways thanks for messaging me! I always have fun when I have someone to talk to about ysblf 🥰 tho I apologize for taking so long to reply😭

Don’t hate me! I love ya 😚❤️

#bruh i always go on a rant!#also! sorry for going off track💀#ysblf #betty la fea #yo soy betty la fea #armando mendoza #beatriz pinzón solano

8 notes · View notes

musette22 · 1 year

Note

Hiiii loveliest Minnie!! 💕💕💕

I know it’s been WAY too long since I’ve been in your asks screaming, which is honestly a travesty, but I’m here now!

And I’m here because I’m FURIOUS with Chris. He’s just…he looks so fucking good and he’s being all like THIS:

And it honestly drives me insane 😫😫😫 He’s looking so ridiculously good and happy and excited and dorky and HOT and stupid and UGHH when will it END????? (I hope never)

I know that you’re still catching up on Chris content (like me), and this freaking movie isn’t even here yet and he’s already killing me. Just…those eyes!!! The grey patches in his beard!! His whole stupid entire face!! The outfits!!! 😭

UGHHHHH. I honestly love him soooo much and this look makes me want to cry and scream and bite and idk where I was going with this ask but yeah I’m going slightly crazy & I wanted to yell at someone about it 😂

I hope you’re having a lovely, not so busy day today!! I love youuuuu 💕💕💕💕

MAYAAAAAAAAAAAA 🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹 Man, I love you 🥺 Thank you for sending me not one but two extremely relatable and slightly, endearingly unhinged asks today!!! I can always count on you feeling the exact same overwhelming feelings about this guy (about both guys, really) and it's such a joy to yell and scream and thrash on the floor about him with you 🥰 💕

Now, about Christopher. HE LOOKS. SO GOOD. I'm honestly a little (i.e. a lot) mad about it too, because you'd think that at some point he'd stop looking better than ever, or he'd have an off day sometime, but nooooooooo. Not Chris Evans. Chris Evans laughs in the face of off days. Chris Evans simply doesn't acknowledge their existence, let alone has them. Chris Evans only knows on days, and he only knows how to get BETTER looking, not worse. It's really fucking annoying and life ruining, actually 😫

THE GREY IN HIS BEARD ☠️☠️ and his pretty pretty eyes, his fluffy hair that I desperately want to touch and his gorgeous beard and stupidly cute knitted shirts that just make him look like the world's most stylish grandpa, I just klsdgndlkk 😤😤😤😤 I'm so glad that he's looking so happy and healthy and thriving, but GOD, could he just have a tiny little bit of compassion with us for once, maybe?????? This level of gorgeousness and adorability is just rude and unnecessary 😭 Absolute life ruiner, this man. And like you said, we haven't even caught up with everything yet and the movie isn't even out yet, so it's only going to get worse from here 🥴

I LOVE YOU TOO, HONEY <33 Sending the biggest hug imaginable!

p.s. while your ask was loading, he made this face and I just thought it was worth sharing:

#chris evans #mayaaaa 💗💗💗#I have some more asks I'd love to reply to right now #but I'm so tired lmao #I need sleep #I will reply to them tomorrow! <33 #minnie answers

12 notes · View notes

drac-onion · 6 months

Text

Beneath Their Masks Chapter 22 is Up!

Sorry it's so late. Better late than never? I guess?? Is it weird that I feel like these chapters are getting worse as time goes on? Maybe I'm just not vibing with the prompts or anything, but I dunno... Definitely not a good way to sell you on this chapter, but like, idk.

“Welcome to Akira Kurusu’s first official coffee workshop. We’re glad you all could make it.” Akira said, looking a little too proud of himself.

As a kind gesture, Akira had volunteered some of his time and expertise to show the Niijima household how to make a decent cup of coffee. After all, the best kinds of Christmas gifts were the ones you could actually use, right? …Ignoring that Christmas was months ago and Akira was a little busy being in prison to give anyone anything.

“Akira, we’re just hanging out. You don’t need to make this an official anything. ” Ann said, rubbing her eyes.

“Ok, fine, I’m embellishing a little. Sue me.”

“Is that turn of phrase in poor taste?” Sae said. “I mean, you did get sued. That’s why you’re even in Tokyo to begin with.”

“It’s not if I’m the one who says it. That's how it works.“

“I can’t believe we’re already off track…” Makoto said under her breath.

“I have to ask, though. Why am I here again?” Sae said, chin resting on her hand. “While I appreciate the gesture, I already know how to make coffee.”

“While that may be true, Sae-san, you still insist on using that single serve coffee maker and I can’t abide by that.” Akira said, shuddering at the thought. “I was like you, once. Blind. Blind to the wonders of well-made coffee and the effects it has on the soul.”

Sae blinked.

“Also, you were already here. Makoto was the one who asked me to show her, but I don’t mind a larger audience.”

“The coffee I make helps keep me awake, so I don’t think there’s any issue with it.”

“Caffeine doesn’t work on me, so the taste is pretty important.” Akira deadpanned. “Besides, knowing how to make good coffee is paramount to a good relationship…at least, that’s what Sojiro tells me. Basically, this is like one of those couples painting classes. Except you get to have something to drink afterwards.”

“Yusuke would beg to differ.” Ann pointed out.

“Just because Yusuke accidentally drinks paint water sometimes, that doesn’t make it alright. The opposite is true, in fact.” Akira said, shaking his head.

#persona 5 #persona 5 fanfiction #makoann #makoto niijima #ann takamaki #sae niijima #mitsuru kirijo #flufftober

3 notes · View notes

anonymous-tals · 1 year

Text

I guess we don’t know how much of Tony’s story from his show on gay night is true because he was “only pretending to be gay” and a lot of his persona had been cultivated at that point but, of course, we do know that he does like guys(I hc him as bi but bi, gay, whatever, he likes guys) so we at least know the whole society and the police thing is just, like, inherently a real thing. The only thing that I guess would be unconfirmed is the dad one, where his dad is disappointed in him and said he doesn’t want to look at him.

I feel like it probably is true. I’d at least like to believe it is. Because Tony would have to come out to his parents since he was rebranding himself with the persona of the gay magician, so even if he didn’t directly tell them, there’s a good chance they’d find out.

Although, I wouldn’t put it past the Gay Mafia to, like, make Tony come out to his parents so he’d a strong, self-confident gay role model. Because, like, they were willing to force Gob to go to conversion therapy(man, that always makes me wanna cry) just to prove it doesn’t work so, even if Tony didn’t want to tell them because clearly, at the very least, his dad doesn’t have a favorable opinion of him, he might’ve just been forced to.

Anyway, this is all just to say that it’s a really sad detail that Tony’s brother died, a detail mentioned in an earlier season, and then, in the reenactment of him coming out to his dad in his magic show, his dad says, “I don’t wanna look at you, son. Just go to work. Why can’t you be like your brother?”

Like, idk how many siblings Tony has. For all we know, this is a different brother. But, I feel like its likely that this is the same one.

His brother died and is being used to tear Tony down for something he can’t change…That is so sad. And, awful. Like, that has to be a sore spot. Clearly, there’s already some disdain there when it comes to Tony’s dad’s opinion of him. It’s probably a similar kind of situation to Michael where the brother took a more traditional route when it comes to life and Tony and Gob got into magic. They were more creative types. I don’t think Tony would’ve had the same kind of struggles Gob did in school but I feel like they both wouldn’t have done well; I hc Tony not doing well in school to be due to more of a rebellious lack of caring while Gob would’ve had, like, learning disabilities that got in the way and made stuff inherently more difficult(but he also eventually adopted the idc mindset even though it definitely would be a sore subject if brought up).

Anyway, using the brother against Tony is awful in it’s own right but the fact that he’s dead just makes it even worse. Like, “Tony, you’re a burden and you’re brother was better than you in every way; more successful. But, he died, so now I’m left with you and…and now you pull this? You’re telling me, what, you’re gay?”

“I don’t want to look at you, son. Just go to work. Why can’t you be like your brother?”

Or, another scenario I thought of:

So, his dad says get back to work. I mean, we don’t know Tony’s life but I feel like he’s been a full time magician for the run of the show. What work would he be getting back to(not to say this still couldn’t work with the other idea I had, it’s just a detail worth looking into)? So, what if Tony came out earlier on his life to his dad. Maybe they have a family business, idk. Or, maybe he was helping out at his dad’s job. Whatever. Or, maybe he was just, like, raking the leaves and that’s the work.

It doesn’t matter. Moving on.

He comes out to his dad and he has this negative reaction, chastising him and all that, and that pushes Tony back even deeper into the closet, leading him to that womanizing guy we see in the earlier seasons; the one who sleeps with his dead brother’s widow.

My idea for how Tony got involved with the Gay Mafia was that a member of it caught Tony making out with some guy in some position of power related to the magic scene or some good venue. And, either they just assume this or Tony comes up with the story that he’s not actually gay, he was just making out with the his manager to bribe him into getting him a good deal or something(which isn’t true, he was making out with him because he likes guys and they both wanted to do that). But, they’re like, “Whatever, we don’t care if you’re actually gay or not. There’s two options we’re gonna give you, though. Either we out you to the world, potentially losing you the platform and the audience you had been building for yourself for your entire life, or you agree to rebrand yourself as the gay magician and we’ll provide you with a platform and an audience even better than you had before,” and Tony, backed into a corner, chooses the second option.

Anyway, that’s all I really have to say. We don’t know a lot about him but there are sprinkles of detail in there that really lend to an interesting backstory for this guy. I suppose that’s all I have to say for now. This was just kind of a messy ramble of Tony thoughts. Hope ya liked ‘em!

#tony wonder #ben stiller #arrested development #another day another arrested development essay written #blunder #gob bluth #will arnett

10 notes · View notes

kitakashi · 11 months

Note

not anime related but I do need some kind of advice (if you can call it that) (also you can answer this privately if you need to) I just wanted to ask you how do you deal with everyday insecurities or how did your journey to self love start and ended? (I don’t think it every ends tho bc I feel like people still learn everyday) I usually don’t feel much insecurity these days but there are some days when like a tiktok video I see I guess triggers is and I try not to let it get to me at times and it doesn’t most of the time but there’s always that slip up where it does affect me.. it use to be much worse back before I started to go to therapy. I don’t usually read people’s works anymore bc idk why it triggers my loneliness and insecurities and that’s why I’ve strayed away in reading cute little stories most people post here. then when I do it’s like it hits me like woah okay that’s why I stopped reading this stuff. it’s weird tho bc it really never did but not sure why it does now? its a little confusing.

How I deal with insecurities? Sleep. No joke. When I can’t turn off that voice in my head it’s nap time. Being tired blows things out of proportion, and I easily exhaust myself with self deprecating thoughts. Taking a nap allows my brain to calm down and be a bit more rational about my loathing upon awakening.

I don’t have much self love and to be honest, I get triggered constantly. I have so many insecurities. Being jobless for a year due to medical reasons that don’t seem to be going away, being so heavily in debt due to not working, gaining so much weight from not moving around like I used to, having to live with my parents (who I love and are very helpful but my mom is an extrovert who can not leave me alone). I could keep going but I believe I’ve made my point. Not a lot of self love.

All that on top of depression, anxiety, ADHD, PTSD… not a great combo. I need therapy.

I have been blessed enough to have a wonderful best friend who loves me and listens to my rants. She’s a mom, wife, small business owner, and author but she still makes time for me. Life gets in the way sometimes but she helps me remember I have strengths and not just weaknesses.

Feeling alone is completely normal. I feel it, you feel it, Bob who will scroll past without liking this post feels it. That’s one of the reasons we try to comfort ourselves by writing and reading fanfiction.

I was talking with a friend on here who loves soulmate AUs. But my brain can’t let me like something without pointing out all the things that could go wrong. So I wrote about feeling rejected by a soulmate but still gave it a happy ending because I am soft and have to have my happily ever after. I’ve also written my own comfort fic.

Unfortunately, I’m not a good person to ask about how to deal with insecurities. I stared at this ask for hours thinking of what to say. And scrolling back up I’ve said a lot of nothing. While I can’t give you advice, I hope you don’t feel so alone.

#precious mutuals 💍

2 notes · View notes

lesbolieeh · 2 years

Text

UPDATE!💁‍♀️✨

So… I haven’t posted in a while…

If u wanna skip my life update and just see the blog update go to under the red line haha

And I can explain myself! This was my last year in school so I had to focus on exams. In early June I graduated finally! And ever since then I’ve been travelling because school has burnt me out and I need to regain a part of myself again (also fuck my homophobic parents haha) and meet new people and do shit I never would’ve done before. Also I live in a country that’s way too close to Ukraine for my comfort and there’s been a heat wave in Europe so it’s nice to not be there! (Btw I am not rich I’m just a regular Swedish citizen who has saved money for a long time and is now travelling very cheap)

I spent two months in Korea and had such a fun time and made many new friends! I’m currently in Thailand and have been here for almost two months! This time I didn’t make as many friends since it’s hard to befriend locals as they mostly want to talk to you so you can support their businesses — which I can’t blame them for (Thailand’s economy was hurt by corona as it prevented all tourism)! I’ve made some foreign friends but everyone is leaving each city/island after a few days so it’s hard to keep contact unfortunately — also everyone is much older😬

HOWEVER! I did match with a girl on tinder on my last week in Korea and she was also going to Thailand and so we decided to meet in Bangkok and now we’re travel buddies :D so at least I made one good and close friend! She’s my age (thankfully) and from Germany. It’s so interesting to se how different our cultures are although we’re from close countries haha. Also we’re both communicating with English which is the third language for both of us! And I speak a bit of German, and Swedish (my first language) is similar to German so whenever we don’t know a word in English we just say it in Swedish/German and usually the other person understands that crazy enough!!

Next week I’m going to Vietnam and I’m honestly so excited to see the nature, eat tasty food and hopefully learn some Vietnamese!

—————————

If u read all of the above: thank u😘😘😘 ur so sweet wtf

I have decided I’ve been chilling enough and should go back to writing as my English skills have been hurting! (If you don’t actively practice writing your third language you will get worse at it sadly enough)

I have a lot of requests already… which I have to write and I will!

But in the meantime, should I rewrite fics from my boy group blog into girl group version so you have something to read while I write fics? (If u think it’s a good idea pls comment an emoji or private text me so Ik what y’all would like💕)

Also idk if this is too much to ask for, but if u feel comfortable could u tell me if u prefer for me to post group reactions/scenarios or idol fics? (Again comment or private text me💕)

To be clear! As I am travelling I will not make this my priority and will post on my own pace! Hope you understand♥️ anyway have an awesome day!

#update

9 notes · View notes

variousnumbers · 2 years

Text

i had a sort of epiphany about how others perceive me and my anxiety at my last job, early pandemic, and that shit stuck with me so i’m gonna share

i worked at a grocery store in order fulfillment, so while i was on the same level as most of my coworkers, i was often running around doing specific tasks and would have to ask for help quite often due to time constraints- this was a built in part of the job and other team members were expected to try and help if they had the ability. but being the neurotic thing i am, almost every request came with a “i’m so sorry, but…” and any amount of perceived inconvenience to them just made me feel worse and apologize more.

one day i had to get something off a high shelf and needed to use a machine to do so, but my role didn’t require me to have the keys for it on my person, so i had to ask someone to get it for me (or take their keys). i asked one of my favorite coworkers, a SUPER sweet dude who i never felt was secretly mad at me. (which is impressive for my brain. like this guy’s vibes were immaculate.)

i ask him, and apologize profusely as always bc it looked like he might be busy but my timing was super urgent. and almost IMMEDIATELY this dude turns to me and says “hey, did i snap at you at all? i’m sorry if i made you nervous, you haven’t done anything wrong! i’ll get that down for you.” and it fucking ROCKED MY WORLD.

i had been tiptoeing through every. single. interaction. and apologizing more than saying things of substance. for the entire time i’d worked there. because i felt like an inconvenience! and IN DOING SO I STRESSED THE KIND PEOPLE OUT! i made my favorite coworker ask what HE did wrong, because obviously my reactions were not particularly warranted for the replies i was getting- i was so insecure and caught up in being a burden that i MADE MYSELF A BURDEN.

i don’t think it was WRONG of me to act like this per se, i def have some trauma below the surface that my coworkers didn’t have the context of- but that’s just it! they wouldn’t have known i was feeling that way if i didn’t audibly doubt myself during 99% of interactions with them! and since then i’ve worked really hard to stop undermining myself before others can do it for me. because a lot of people? aren’t ever trying to undermine/belittle those around them! or sometimes people snap a bit on accident due to stress! i realized that my reactions actually matter a whole damn lot in relation to how comfortable people feel interacting with me.

which should have been obvious, right? like, i try to be kind to others bc that’s how i want them to treat me, but it never occurred to me that it might not be much fun to talk to someone who gives off more anxiety and insecurity than actual personality. i thought i was being agreeable, but i have no idea how many people felt the same way as my coworker and never felt good about asking if they did something wrong! so i could never tell them they didn’t.

idk i just want you to know that if you’re feeling like i was, (and honestly still sometimes do bc healing is not linear,) you’re worth asking for help. and a “thank you” always feels better than an “i’m sorry for bothering you.” and also i love you!! i’m sorry you feel this torn down but you can trick your brain into being nicer to itself. it just takes a while.

#uhhhh this is long and maybe no one cares #i feel like i should tag this with stuff…?#mental health #anxiety #depression #yeah idk gang that’s all i got #WELL. literally it’s not but that’s all i think applies 🤪

2 notes · View notes