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#im so sorry to all the people that dont follow me and have to deal with my stupid long posts i like.. i like the full views
dandyshucks · 2 months
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blinks tiredly. i decide "hm maybe i should try to expand my circle and step outside of it a little, lets go look at the main community tags" and im just greeted with a bunch of edgelords who think saying "fiction doesn't affect reality, don't like don't read" is peak activism and "fighting censorship". head in my hands. this is partially why i do not ever go into the community tags, my nervous system cannot handle blocking fifty weirdos every single day just so i can have a normal experience in the community tags hfdsjkl
#I HAVE SO MANY PEOPLE BLOCKED ALREADY. i am TRYING to curate my experience 😭😭😭#and i have so many tags blacklisted fjdsjkl like. so many. every single variation of tag to do with those chuckleheads#which helps avoid them a lot of the time tbh bc it'll flag posts that ppl rb if the original post was tagged w any of those#so i can avoid rbing posts that have chuckleheads as the op most of the time#i also usually double check OP's blog before i rb stuff now bc man this place is rife with these weirdos#ANYWAYS. yes i want to try to engage w the community but i do not think i can handle it if theres gonna be so many edgelords jkdslfl#the only way i follow new ppl now is when yall do promo hour and i sometimes see a new face pop up fdsjkl#every now and then i have energy to try to engage with new ppl but its so difficult when so many ppl are such insufferable edgelords !!!!#''im the nasty pr-sh-pper your parents warned you about 😎'' cool man you sound like the most insufferably obnoxious person ever. :/#''if you like CENSORSHIP-'' i am hitting block immediately bc u have a fundamental misunderstanding of what censorship actually is 👍#I'M TIREDDDD WHY ARE PEOPLE SO DUMB ABOUT THIS STUFF. ''fiction doesn't affect reality'' I GUESS PROPAGANDA DOESNT EXIST THEN ????#what a strange world they live in honestly. they dont understand how stories have served humans since the dawn of time. sighing loudly.#vent //#SORRY FOR THIS ONE IM JUST. ARGH. ppl talk abt encouraging community but i think maybe im not cut out for community#i want desperately to partake but i cannot handle it if it means dealing w all these bozos#it frustrates me to no end fdhsjkl and it upsets me so much and i wish i could deal w it better but. my nervous system is broken fdsjkl#i will try to expand my circle every now and then but i cannot do it often bc of this 😭 im not going to give up entirely though fdsjkl#(also this is partially why i dont tag my posts w community tags anymore bc i am just. so scared of these freaks getting their hands on it)#(the most i'll do is s.afeship or variations every now n then bc supposedly they're not in those tags fdsjkl)#delete later#dandyshucks
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dirt-str1der · 1 year
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Trans kiryu is a genuinely funny hc because like trans majima is like oohh angst ohh she has to fight to be accepted she has to deal with people making fun of her for being a man in a dress she has to take into account her position and social standing and kiryu is literally just kiryu forever because the universe loves him too much to ever force him into a situation unless its to go to prison in which case hes like yayyy i love jail yayy yayyy
#Yakzua loveblog#im just talking to myself you guys dont need to read anything#in fact dont read this im going to talk about transphobic nishiki again anyway#my transphobic nishiki hc is the most important one to me because. like we all need to have some transphobic people in our lives#i do think that nishiki calls him ‘kiryu’ even though theyre best friends forever because when nishiki will always accidentally say his#deadname instead of ‘kazuma’ even though i know that nishiki is literally the one who gave him the name kazuma to make fun of kiryu for#thinking hes a boy and it just kind of stuck but nishiki eventually stuck. with calling him kiryu because thats how he prefers to be called#they are bestfriends for a reason .... and nishiki is the only one kiryu will let be transphobic towards him because theyve known each other#for forever and he knows he means no harm by it like he will still hit him but nishiki takes it in stride because its their thing and its#never not funny to make kiryu annoyed like for anyone else its an uncrossable line but once a month nishiki will lead kiryu into the womens#section to shop for new clothes and kiryus like Somehow i always knew you wore womens jeans and nishikis like HEY !!!!#but as kids they were always very cute because theyre always together and you can never really tell whos following who because it seems like#theyre on the same wavelength until nishiki realises that life is so much easier when youre working smart so he went to work on his INT stat#while kiryu never stopped being a wild animal like hes literally some sort of monkey to me sorry for dehumanising him because of his autism#like i adore his ‘own little bubble’ way of life as long as he’s physically okay kiryus not going to complain about anything. like when he#said ‘i decide to do things based on whether i love it or hate it’ im like Yeah i bet you do. he sits outside the orphanage all day playing#with rocks until nishiki comes finds him then they both go outside to smash open windows with the rocks kiryu has gathered and kiryus in his#little skirt and he always uses it to carry things in you know how it is and he stopped going to school to be a bigger menace than everyone#anyway did i mention that the universe loves kiryu. especially his genes he was very lucky because he never had a big chest or nothing he#was always going to get tall and thick in the shoulders and beefy and when he cut his hair it just sealed the deal he passed with flying#colours like young children are indistinguishable by gender unless they have a big pink bow in their hair but kiryu radiated masculinity#from a young age and his aggressive way of life didnt help. well it helped a lot actually. a lot of people were scared of him and nishikis#like dont be scared of kiryu shes nice when you get to know her and everyones like ?? thats a girl ???#in fact it made more sense for kiryu to be a boy at that point so he went to kazama and told him and kazama was like ok lets make it happen#like kiryu and nishiki are so special because there is nobody in the universe more transphobic to kiryu than his own brother but also nishik#was the one helping kiryu shop for boy clothes when he was clueless about it like hes not stupid but he really doesnt know about fashion and#he trusts nishiki to not make him look stupid and nishiki is of course like 😏 well well well youre having a girl moment arent you#nishiki is okay with kiryu being a guy because this means that now whenever kiryu hits him he can fight back without being misogynistic#okay im done talking my noodles are getting cold but kiryu as a kid would have been a veritable nightmare#oh yeah my trans beam extended to nishitani as well because just look at him. everybody majima wants to sex is trans
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be-good-to-bugs · 1 year
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2022
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𝜗𝜚 ݁ ˖ The Advice Column Issue No.1 ; How to deal with fake friends while balancing school life 🎀🧁
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Hii Dolls!!!⭐️ This is officially the first issue of my Brand new segment The Advice Column!!!! and i chose the topic fake friends bc as someone who’s had an alarming amount of fake friends in the past i can definitely give endless advice in this topic and its a collab with the @honeytonedhottie !! bc i thought she could also give so really good advice!!🎀⭐️
Are you struggling with keeping up in your studies? worried if your friends are talking behind ur back? Stressed? Feeling like school and socials are just to much??? DONT WORRY!! Dolly n Honey are gonna save the day!! 🎀⭐️
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Section 1 ; Honey!!🍯
how to balance ur school and social life (in bullet points) !! 🎀🧁
- make a list of priorities and stick to it like its a handbook
- practice saying no to events and saying no to excessive studying, the key is to find an equilibrium
- combine social and academic events
- make sure to use ur time wisely and do whats important first, so that then u can have loads of time for ur social life!
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Section 2 ; Dolly! 🎀
No.1 ; Stand up for yourself!! ⭐️
if ur so called “friend” is constantly make smart remarks about you,scrutinizing you for the smallest thing,being passive aggressive or really just trying to hurt your feelings always stand up for yourself and never let insult like that because that shows that you have no self respect and then they’re gonna just keep doing it set clear boundaries and don’t be a doormat never let this person/people walk all over you , if you didn’t appreciate something they said don’t take shit from them address and make sure it never happens again
No.2 ; spotting a secretly fake friend⭐️!
now there’s obviously “friends” that you can spot from a mile away that they’re definitely toxic but theres also a certain type of friend that could be the sweetest to ur face but secretly talk shit behind ur back and its honestly not that hard to spot one of these “friends” so here are some characteristics of ‘the secretly fake friend’
- never sticks up for you
- constantly lying
- at time can be very passive aggressive
- will tell you that someone was talking about you and not defend you at all
- will make you feel like a bad friend even if they’re wrong in the situation
- if you’ve ever confronted them on their behavior and they say they’re sorry but then repeats the same actions
- lets their other friends talk shit about you
- HUGE VICTIM COMPLEX!
these kinds of fake friends are tricky bc you really can’t spot them at first and then it can be harder to cut them off which brings me to my next point
No.3 CUT THEM OFF !!⭐️
listen i know its hard to let go of these people at first im mean I’ve had to do it multiple times but i swear it gets sooo much easier to not have these people in ur life its way better to have no friends than a bunch of friends thats secretly hate you don’t stay caught up on toxic people like this its a waste of ur own peace and well being , block them,stop following them,stop talking to them have NOTHING to do with these people/person
No.5 ; Ur not special !!
now this title is a bit alarming but what i mean by that is if you have a friend that’s constantly talks down about people for no reason whether it be their friends or someone they know and im not talking about the standard gossip talk bc tbh everyone gossips but im talking about like drags them through the mud calls them mean names and purposefully spreads rumors about other people they’ll do it to do you as well ur not special i doesn’t matter what this person is telling you they’ll talk about any and everyone it doesn’t matter people like this do not care
No.4 ; Being Un-phased !! ⭐️
now after you cut them off either gonna
A. make it seem like they’re innocent and have been nothing but nice to you and try and make you feel bad
B. Act like theirs beef when in reality theres not they just want a reason to start a problem
C. to the standard mean girl remarks side eyes,whispers,random pointing and slightly laughing, or even in some cases talk loudly about you but indirectly
now in any of these situations never let it bother you show no reaction these kinds of people feed off ur fear of them shows no reaction when it comes to things like this and you can also do it back side eye them back,give them weird looks back now im definitely not saying be just like them but play their game don’t let disrespect like this slide and i know how hard it can be especially since these are people ir support be close with but i promise making friends that actually care about you is WORLDS BETTER!!! you’ll have such a peace of mind and being able to make friend that actually care about you is such a freeing feeling!!!!
Reminders!!! 🎀🍯
- they’re opinions don’t matter
- these people are no above you in any way shape or form
- stress is normal don’t let it get to you !!
- you deserve much better friends
- it normal to feel sad after cutting them off
- this person/these people don’t deserve you!!!
- you got thiss!!!
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flashbangstars · 3 months
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How People Found out you two were dating
NCT Dream Edition
pink ~ y/n
Blue ~ dream
Green ~ secondary character/another dreamie
Mark
"so um Jeno found out about us dating"
"oh, I thought we were waiting until game night to tell them"
"well yeah uh funny story, I tried to put my sweatshirt on at Jeno's house and your hot pink thong fell out of the sleeve onto his carpet."
"I WAS WONDERING WHERE THAT WENT"
"Yeah I know me too, besides that. Jeno got mad and lectured me on not leading you on if I had other girls I was doing stuff with, so I uh.."
"you told Jeno the hot pink thong was mine"
"yeah basically"
"and I have to face him on friday knowing he's seen my panties"
"to be fair he did say they were cute"
"you know that actually didn't help at all"
Renjun
"hey babe can you help me really quickly, I need help moving my monitor, the cord is stuck somewhere behind my desk"
"Y/n can it wait like 10 minutes"
"No it literally can't I have a assignment due in thirty minutes and I will literally jump off a fucking cliff if I don't get full credit for this"
"Nice Hello Kitty Underwear"
"Renjun you're the one who bought me these, you've seen them and taken them off me numerous times"
"oh he has!! has he!"
"go put some pants on please sweetheart"
"I'm so fucking terrified why were their two different voices just now"
"Hi y/n"
"I'm gonna start crying please tell me Jaemin didn't just see me in fucking hello kitty underwear"
"Y/n please go put some pants on"
"yeah....yeah I'll go do that...... Uh just so you know....im not letting him hit for free.....he did ask me out"
"congrats to the happy couple"
"fuck you"
Jeno
"so how did you all manage to fail the same test?"
"I cheated off of Haechan, and Haechan Cheated off of Jaemin, so its basically Jaemin's fault"
"hey I thought Jaemin knew what he was doing"
"Haechan, Jaemin never knows what he is doing"
"fair"
"oh fuck, I have to go babe I'm gonna miss the bus if I dont run, I will see you soon" *phatass smooch before leaving* *leaves*
5 minutes later....
"alright I'm back I missed the bus"
"DID YALL JUST FUCKING KISS?"
"....no"
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN NO I FUCKING WATCHED IT HAPPEN"
"oh thats so crazy I think I just heard the bus, I have to go omg byeeeeee"
"so you're leaving me to deal with this"
"yes, bye pookie, smooches I'll see you later tonight, bye Haechan!"
Haechan
"are we gonna talk about it... or should I just ignore it"
"ignore what"
"im not following"
"are you two being serious"
"dude what the fuck are you talking about??"
"Haechan."
"what"
"you've been sitting in y/n's lap the entire time we've been here"
"and...?"
"we are literally just close friends"
"dog you are literally hand feeding haechan french fries"
"im literally baby"
"even that was a lot for me"
"im sorry pookie"
"allllriight get off, I wont be this couple"
"pookie did you just make it official!"
"can you please be normal"
Jaemin
"Hypothetically what do you guys consider too much for a gift for your significant other"
"well how long would you two have been dating"
"like 6 months...?"
"umm anything ring related, thats kinda scary, too reminiscent of marriage"
"well fuck"
"what do you mean oh fuck? what the fuck did you buy"
"a ring"
"what"
"what...."
"for who??"
"y/n"
"WHAT"
"Y/N?"
"WHY?"
"YOU'VE BEEN DATING FOR 6 MONTHS?"
"STOP YELLING AT ME"
Chenle
"the guys know you and me are dating"
"what? how"
"I got in trouble"
"what did you do..."
"they all got kinda mad at me and said I was kinda mean to you and asked what my issue with you was"
"and what did you say"
"please don't be mad"
"chenle"
"I told them not to worry because you think it's hot when I'm kinda mean"
"chenle"
they didn't believe me at first... and I was feeling pressured!...they literally cornered me!"
"chenle"
"so I showed them a little bit of our texts when you said...itwassexy whenIwasmeantoyou"
"run"
"I WILL TELL THEM ABOUT THE MOMMY KINK IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL BETTER?"
"run. now"
"ok!"
Jisung
"hey guys, just wanted to let you know me and jisung are dating now officially"
*shriek* "WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT!"
"Jisung what..."
"I DONT EVEN KNOW WHO YOU ARE"
"jisung park"
"please ma'am stop spreading that!"
"ANDY"
"I'm so sorry guys I dont know whats gotten into her!"
"jisung...She's literally your lockscreen"
"I literally have no idea what you are talking about"
"jisung I WILL do a coochie ban"
"this is actually bae 4 lyfe, she my day one and I worship the ground she walk on fr"
"thats what I thought"
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Hi! here is a little something from the drafts that is basically finished, I hope you like it! I am fr just getting back into writing so excuse any errors. But i hope yall have a good night/day!
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adaelines · 1 year
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Jealousy, A Bitter Drink.
once again its 4am and im posting smut! yay!
vash the stampede x reader
warnings for vash alien genitalia, reader being jealous, sub whiny vash my favourite! in the back alley behind a inn so Techically public but you dont get caught or anything! you shove your fingers in his mouth to keep him quiet.
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You were nearly at your wits end. 
Vash hadn’t done anything wrong, per say, but when the entire gang decides to go out drinking after finally arriving at an inn and he’s spending all his attention on someone else, you can’t help but feel unease. You trust him with your entire heart, with everything you are, you know he would never do anything, but you can’t help the jealousy that simmers in your chest everytime you look over and see him laughing at what the girl obviously flirting with him says. 
It’s almost too much, and if the glare you’re fixing them both with doesn’t alert them, you don’t know what else will. You could always approach, kindly let her know Vash is taken, and talk with him yourself but.. You don’t want Vash to think you don’t trust him, that you think he can’t handle himself. So you sit and stew in your bitter feelings, hand around your drink tightening, and you swear on any gods out there if she gets even the tiniest bit closer, you’re gonna go over there and throw the glass at her. You’re sitting with Meryl, Wolfwood, and Milly, but you haven’t paid attention to them at all since Vash went to get you both drinks and didn’t return. Awfully rude of hi, you thought with a pout, keeping you waiting for a girl? Maybe there would be a better way to deal with this, a better way to get back his attention, one that doesn’t involve violence that he so deeply hates. 
So with a smile and a quiet laugh, you tell the three people you’re sitting with you’ll go and collect your rowdy lover and your drinks, and hope that they don’t see the devious plan brewing behind your eyes. You give them a smile and a wave, and they’re quick to go back to arguing about whatever they were before you interrupted. Picking up your glass, you walk over to Vash and the girl with a smile. One you know Vash will be able to tell is fake, but not the girl you’re about to steal him from. Well, it’s not your fault, she stole his attention first and Vash needs reminding just who he belongs to. 
The walk over to him was brisk, and when you gently place a hand on his arm and tell him you need to speak to him privately, outside, he immediately knew he was in trouble. Vash gave the girl a sheepish smile and then followed his lover, laughing with nerves, but directly on your heels. You led him outside, around the back of the inn where you were staying, and gave him an innocent smile. You wouldn’t be disturbed here at least, as long as Vash could be quiet, and he wasn’t known for being quiet. 
‘’You took an awfully long time with our drinks, Vash, distracted?’’ The innocent smile remained on your face as you spoke to him, stepping closer and crowding him against the wall behind. 
‘’A-ah,’’ Vash stuttered, his face quickly flushing. He knew you well enough to tell when an innocent smile was not so, and whilst he realised what had happened, he still flashed you a bashful smile., ‘’I’m so sorry! I know i was getting you a drink but… but someone started talking to me, i didn’t want to just ignore them!’’ 
You knew what he was like, knew that sometimes he was too nice for his own good, and the actual worry nipping at your brain quickly left. You’d still have your fun with him, still mess around with him, but you knew sometimes he was just too good, and you never could actually blame him for that. It was just one of the many reasons you loved him, and you could never ever be mad at him for something that was just so incredible about him. With a devious smile, you pressed your hand against his chest, gently moving it up until you took a hold of his jaw. You made sure to linger around the places you knew he was sensitive, the places you knew would cause a hitch in his breath and the flush on his cheeks to spread. Trailing kisses from his lips to his ear, you took the lobe between your teeth, before quietly whispering directly in his ear.
‘’You’ll have to be quiet, sweetheart. Don’t want to get us kicked out when we finally found a nice inn for us… you remember your safe-word, yeah?’’ 
At Vash’s high pitch whimper, you couldn’t help but pull away and coo at him. His cheeks were flushed a dark red, his eyes wide and mouth wobbly. You really couldn’t help but tease him, he was just too cute sometimes.
‘’Aw, baby, that’s all I need to mention to get you worked up? Aren’t you a needy thing? Let me take care of you Vash, I still have to remind you who you belong to..’’
With a wicked smile and one last kiss pressed to his lips, you trailed kisses down his neck. Listening to his whines, his quiet moans and just the simplest of kisses, you really couldn’t wait to listen to him trying to keep himself together. You continued, moving down his chest, until you had to sink onto your knees to keep going. Vash whimpered again at the sight, leaning his head back and closing his eyes tightly. Simply looking at you was enough for him to feel the slick between his legs, feel his cock twitch from where it sat between his lips inside of him, and he gently moved one shaky hand to brush the hair away from your face. You always got to him so quickly, with a few simple words and touches he would be completely under your spell, completely willing and wanting. He’d do anything for you if you simply asked, and it showed in just how he was looking at you when he opened his eyes, full of nerves, anxiety, but above that full of absolute adoration and lust. 
Slowly, gently, you began at the buttons on his pants. You wanted to take your time with him, as much as you could behind a dingy old inn, with kisses pressed against the wiry blonde hair that lead from below his belly button to the top of his pants. The way you looked up at him between your eyelashes was almost too much for him, his legs already beginning to shake where he was standing. His quiet whimpers of ‘’please, please, can’t wait anymore…’’ caused you to smile against his happy trail, letting out a quiet laugh. You gently hooked your fingers into the band of his pants and underwear, tugging them down just enough to have access to his slick petal-like folds. You knew it usually took some encouragement for his cock to come out, encouragement you were more than happy to provide. 
‘’Please, please, fuck, i need you so bad…’’’ Vash whined quietly, his head banging against the wall when he threw it back and bared his neck to you. You used your hands to shove his knees apart, causing him to squeak, giving you more room to move between his legs. He looked utterly debauched at the moment. Shirt riding up his stomach, the kiss and bite marks you had previously left on show, his stomach and chest littered in purple bruises and teeth indentations. His face was so flushed you would be worried he had a fever if you weren’t on your knees in front of him, and his expression was so desperate, so lewd and full of wanton need, you wanted to make him beg for hours until he lost his voice and had to explain just why even talking made his throat hurt. 
‘’It’s okay, sweetheart, i’ll take care of you..’’ You leant forward slowly, teasingly, pressing a kiss against his folds. One of your hands came up to gently rub the spot where his lips met, eyes staring up at him the entire time. You wanted to see every reaction, every little whimper and shudder, anything. Using your fingers to spread his folds, you pressed licks against his hole, as deep as you could reach with your other hand gripping onto his thigh so tight you were sure he’d have bruises, sure he’d be feeling you for days. He gave you a quick warning, a rushed ‘’ohmygodimsosorryitscomingout’’, before you pulled back and gently pressed a kiss to where his hip bone jutted out. His cock, lighter than his skin and as pretty as you would expect from a Plant, appeared from between his folds, and you immediately grinned up at him. He had no reason to be embarrassed, he was truly gorgeous, and deliciously sensitive.You couldn’t wait to get your hands, your lips, your anything on him. Even the cold air against him made him shudder, a shaky hand coming from against the wall to tangle itself in your hair. 
Wrapping your hand around his shaft, even that slight pressure was enough to make a very loud whine come from him, you leant forward and pressed a kiss to the tip of his cock. You gave him a grin when he struggled to keep himself together, told him to lean forward, and when he did, you shoved your fingers in his mouth. You had to keep him quiet somehow, had to make sure he didn’t make too much of a mess and you always did love having him suck on your fingers. The grin on your face never faded, not as Vash somehow became even more flustered, or as he let out the loudest moan yet. You knew from experience that his teeth were much sharper than those of a human, sharp enough to easily cut skin, but you didn’t care if you ended up with rings of teeth shaped cuts around the bottom of your fingers. Anything was worth it to see the look on his face as he swirled his tongue around your fingers, eyes lidded and full of desperation. He always shut up quickly with your fingers in his mouth, always immediately became the obedient boy he truly was.
‘’What a good boy,’’ you hummed, ‘’My good boy, keep quiet, yeah? I’m not stopping till you’re begging me to.’’
And when he desperately nodded around your fingers, you leaned forward, taking his tip into your mouth. You had to stop a grin at the noise he let out, muffled by your fingers, and you looked up at him through your eyelashes. Vash was always so pretty like this. Always so gorgeous when he’d take anything you gave him, willing to submit to anything you wanted to do. As you slowly lowered your mouth, taking him as deep as you could, his legs almost gave out from under him. If it wasn’t for your other hand wrapped around his thigh, keeping him stable and as close as physically possible, you wouldn’t be surprised if he ended up on the floor. You grinned around his cock, best as you possibly could, and as your nose was buried in the wiry blond hair at the base, you shoved your fingers as deep as you possibly could in your position. The noise he let out was gorgeous, a loud moan broken by a choke, and when you hummed around his length the whine he let out sounded more like a sob. 
‘’Mmnmclose… fuckfuckfuck…’’ Even around your fingers you could make out what he was trying to say, merely doubling your effort to make him cum. He always was so pretty when he got close, even more desperate and whiny. Even if it was hard on your throat to take him to the base, straining and almost making you choke, it was worth it for the look on his face. Was worth it for the way he whined your name around your fingers, the way he clenched his eye shut and nearly doubled over you. You let out as close to a laugh as you could with his cock down your throat, swallowing around him. Anything for the extra pressure, anything that would increase his whines and tip him just over the edge. Even as you gagged on him, eyes watering and hand around his thigh tightening, you pushed even more. His moans made it worth it, made it easy, and you only pulled away when the hand in your hair gripped tightly, his teeth bearing down on your fingers.
Even as the pain makes you wince, even as you feel your skin break and blood enter Vash’s mouth, even as he cums in yours, you don’t pull back. Not until he whines loudly around your fingers that he's cumming, he's cumming, please don’t stop! Not until you feel his cum down your throat, only ever pulling away when you feel as if you can’t breathe, you swallow as much as you can and grin up at him, making a show of it. Anything not in your mouth is on your face, and Vash slumps quickly. You pull your hand out of his mouth to support him as he slides down the wall to sit half in your lap, half on the floor, and you’re quick to wrap your arms around him. To tell him just how good he was for you, how he made you so proud. He spits the blood out of his mouth, giving you a wonky grin, and you laugh loudly at how funny he looks with the remaining blood and flush on his cheeks. You wipe the cum on your face with your shirt, deciding to worry about the stain later, and you press your lips to his.
‘’You okay?’’ Your voice is quiet, raspy from the strain on your throat, and you pull Vash as close to you as you possibly can. Maybe an alley behind the inn isn’t the best place to cuddle, but you can’t bring yourself to care when Vash is in your arms, when you're offering him comforting words and gentle kisses. In response to you, he nuzzles into your chest, a bright dopey grin on his face. 
‘’As good as one can be after uh, finishing, in your mouth!’’ Even in the afterglow he never fails to make you laugh, make you so happy you don’t even focus on the pain in your throat, and you give him the deepest, most passionate kiss you can muster. He deserves it after what you put him through, and he reciprocates quick, wrapping his arms around you as tight as he can and smiling into the kiss.  As you hear Meryl shouting for you both loudly, followed by a comment from Wolfwood that makes her even louder, you smile back into the kiss. You know Vash will get you back, and you can’t wait for him to even try.
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wistfulrat · 7 months
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・❥・lesbian wangxian reccs ・❥・
ao3topships poll gate made me realize there are hundreds nay thousands of u who dont know abt lesbian wangxian ?? that’s so sad can i proselytize u real quick
mimilamp cinematic universe (the ppl’s mcu) sorry for starting this list with a whole author catalog. as if it's my fault!! these gave me covid. no listen mimilamp fics have feverish lesbian angst levels of hot horny despair that could paralyze a large forest animal. and on a sentence level it's just stunning. messy dykes fumbling toward love confessions while making emotionally insane choices and the sex scenes fuckn bang ??? god is real
good, good - 13.5k E Wei Ying has two broken wrists and now she needs Lan Zhan to help her do stuff (jerk off)
here’s a story - 46k E Wei Ying reluctantly joins her recently-dumped best friend, Lan Zhan, on a couples' holiday retreat. Snow! Drinks! Truth or dare! There's a s-s-s-single bed! You'll never guess what happens next.
out of your system - 20k E “Maybe you should get me out of your system,” Wei Ying blurts. “Maybe that’ll help.” // Wei Ying finds out her best friend Lan Zhan is in love with her and offers a really super solution.
exposure therapy - 14k E Wei Ying clambered up from the floor, put the joint on the corner of the night stand, announced, “Exposure therapy,” and got into Lan Zhan’s bed. // Lan Zhan doesn't like to be touched, Wei Ying likes to touch.
know no one else - 20k E Lan Zhan moves out, Wei Ying's boyfriend moves in. Six months later, Lan Zhan visits, they go to a party, and Wei Ying has something to tell her.
74243 this author should be studied in a lab bc these 2 fics ruined my life. a pulitzer prize short fic with immaculate tone followed by the fuck nastiest shit you will ever read. "wei ying swipes right" still a top 3 bar of all time re: fic summaries. like people died.
chef’s kiss - 6.5k E Wei Ying said, “You know, in some ways I’m kind of depressed. I took your biggest dick on my first try. Now I don’t have anything to build up to.” “There are bigger ones available,” Lan Zhan said lazily. “I can pay for express shipping.” // (Lan Zhan works the late shift.)
pull out game weak - 22.7k E Wei Ying swipes right.
plonk this is the only fic in many ways. dyke nmj's mustache academy award winning breakout role. possessive hot dyke lwj. the sentence "don't knot her you freak." have u ever seen a group chat get rabies in real time. the slut rot breached containment. it was a public health crisis. it brought back horny cinema. cultural reset.
good friends - 11.5k E “I could invite her over for when the game’s done,” Nie Mingjue offers. Lan Zhan hums, considering it. They do that sometimes. Take omegas down together.
occultings will i ever get tired of -wwx thinks she's straight and wants to practice being gay with sadsack lwj who is like sure im in love with u and this will cause me psychic damage but mayhaps that's the cost of being homiesexual--? no i dont get tired of the classics it's called taste
give me one good honest kiss - 25k E The text keeps flashing over and over in Lan Zhan's head like the bulb lights on a marquee. They’d been talking about homework directly before that, swapping notes on music theory in the baroque period. Then, like a fork of lightning out of a clear blue sky: wanna practice kissing? 😚 // Wei Ying suggests an arrangement. Lan Zhan, in love, deals.
saltyfeathers ok so like sure it's ill advised to get your cartilage pierced at claire's but if you wanted the experience of participating in deranged hysteric behavior that kinda bangs in a badgood way? well then.
the mall that has it all - 8k E She introduced herself in the food court, breathless after sprinting across it in Lan Zhan’s direction and vaulting over a table only to crash into the seat across from her, ask, “Can I have a sip?”, spring forward with both elbows on the table to wrap her burgundy lips around Lan Zhan’s smoothie straw, wrinkle her nose, and say, “What is that, kale? Not really my thing, as like, a mall goth. Oh!” A pleased, chaotic exhale. “My name’s Wei Ying.” Lan Zhan said, after taking a moment to fully process the last forty-five seconds, “What?” or; mall goth au
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l0viez · 1 year
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Back again with another dumbass "imagine sagau fics"
Im going crazy either way its fine. Anyways imagine having MEGAN in a Sagau fanfic lmao, (if you havent watched the movie yet , i 97% recommend!)
SAGAU ;
Imagine having MEGAN as a gift or just a comfort "toy" to have gifted by someone and ever since that day you guys became like twins , technically glued to eachother☠️
Being in a SAGAU with MEGAN is like having a bulletproof bodyguard
Devoted Followers, Vessels, Personal Bodygaurd, Worshipper Who??? I only know MEGAN
Whenever theres someone trying to attack you aka their "grace" , MEGAN will slice their throat in half in like 0.1 faster than xiao teleporting to traveller whenever they call his name/hj
Your "followers" in teyvat WILL glare at MEGAN and if you tell them to leave MEGAN alone MEGAN will smirk at them like "I win btch" but if you just brush it off or like laugh it off MEGAN will death glare at them back
MEGAN has the "grace's right hand" privileges, Shes like your co-worker or vice-president or sum LMAO
The non humans (yk like Archons,, Venti, Zhongli, Ei, Xiao, Ganyu, and etc) would be like salty or envy over the fact you hang out with MEGAN and has more trust on MEGAN than them, like they has been worshipping you for what?? 99999+ years, centuries?? what did that "doll" do to gain your attention like that??😦
I feel like the ones that would accept MEGAN whole heartedly and would love her /p is the childrens or the teens,, if that makes sense😭 ! (Klee, Diona, Qiqi, Sayu, YaoYao, Dori, Xiangling, Noelle, Collei, Fischl, Bennet and more)
Since MEGAN has that fighting skills noelle would probably ask MEGAN for some advice so she can be apart of the KOF (as usual) ! and MEGAN would use her "robotic skills" and just give out noelle the whole description on how to fight and stuff it probs took like 3-6hours for MEGAN to finish bc noelle wants to know alot😭
It would be more cooler if like MEGAN plays genshin or like knows all the lore and characters (the power she holds☠️)
Whenever you sneak out, go on a meeting, went out to buy some stuff , went to travel you bet your ass MEGAN will be beside u 24/7 even if the mobs dont attack you MEGAN would still be on gaurd to make sure nothing harms you
MEGAN would play some songs back in your world if you feel stressed out by the work and responsibilities
MEGAN would make a deal with the fatui or the abyss to secretly spy on you where ever or whenever you go (its not like you will leave without her🫣!!!)
MEGAN gives me that platonic yandere vibes so if you ever have "secret admirers" , MEGAN would scan that letter properly and find your admirers house and "talk" to them nicely to stop bothering you
MEGAN would have that resting bitch face on 24/7 but whenever you talk to her she would look so bubbly and nice, but whenever your not around shes so close on choking the people that has been "eyeing" you whenever you breathe, theyre lucky that you told MEGAN to not harm anyone
MEGAN wouldnt give a damn fck about visions, like she would think its useless but the fatui would give her a delusion either way😭👆🏻 (you requested it)
MEGAN would find a way to either destory teyvat or make a portal to make you both go back home cause she doesnt plan on sharing you with anyone any time soon shes only having thin patience around these mfs , but she has to play nice for now😄‼️
IMPOSTER AU! SAGAU ;
you both somehow got teleported in genshin, idk how maybe MEGAN like heard you say you wanted to go to teyvat and MEGAN is like "im a robot i can do technology i can do portal shit lets go"
so now here you both are, eating soup in a small little camp and some fruit giving by some monsters you two met along the way! isnt that nice:')))
You had abit of wound, you were thinking you would have more wound than the wounds you got but suprise suprise MEGAN protected your sorry ass
looks like MEGAN has to train harder but good thing she still have some tricks on her sleeves
MEGAN doesnt mind threatening off a few "side characters" so you two would survive
MEGAN would send death threats to the "creator//the real imposter" and she would have it in like some of the archon's handwriting without signing (bc in the movie she managed to make a masterpiece of a drawing like zamn😭)
MEGAN would give out fake informations and will say its from the "creator//the real imposter" so they would believe it but it will take like a 1-2 year from them to realized that someone has been spreading fake informations
MEGAN would sneak in the academy and do some chaos in any technology plans they have just to make distractions and give you time to get like items you both might need
If the fatuis know your the real creator and take you both in, MEGAN would only help out the fatuis by giving out personal informations of other characters that they call themselves "devoted worshippers"
MEGAN would probably be great friends with Sandrone & scaramouche
MEGAN would be "friendly friendly" with dottore just to get more technology uses😭
MEGAN has thoughts on just beating the shit out of childe (and probably dottore) but she choose not because she doesnt have time to play around with "childe-rens" and has to be by your side 24/7
but If the abyss finds you both first
ofc they would take you both in and MEGAN would also share some tips or advice to defeat those vision users
The abyss sibling would ask your permission to take MEGAN with them from time to time to set out their plan on destorying teyvet and the people who wronged you
MEGAN was abit hesitant at first cause like,, leaving you alone with the abyss? Naur..
But then you insisted that MEGAN should go with aether (also so you can go explore the abyss abit without MEGAN breathing behind your neck😭)
MEGAN would be a trump card for the abyss like if the traveller sees their abyss sibiling with MEGAN, MEGAN would glare at them, if glaring can kill people traveller would have been dead already
and if traveler shares what he saw when he saw his sibiling to like,, someone they would probably go like "yo wait isnt that the kid with the imposter?!"
If people in teyvat finally get to their senses that the "creator" in the throne is the real imposter
they would hunt you and MEGAN down (again) but with "good intentions"
you and MEGAN would troll these bitches
MEGAN would sing creepy songs while theyre haunting at the dark
you and MEGAN will only go out at night but if theres a squad looking for you both
MEGAN would be hella overprotective and going infront of you with her weapon out while glaring at them
"Your grace!"
"Tsk. little bugs like you shouldn't show yourself infront of your "grace""
MEGAN wouldn't HESITATE too ROAST them.
and you would be laughing inside bc of it too
if ever you get recrowned as the "creator" and the real imposter gets jailed up
MEGAN will TOTURE that bitch whenever your sleeping
those "devoted followers" of yours would look at MEGAN and be like
"damn i wish i was her"
MEGAN will be your loyal bodyguard and right hand
why would you need those people when you have MEGAN who sticked with you even when you were still so young?
like you would have the largest trust issues with stuff like imagine
"(maid/bulter's name), please call zhongli."
"yes your grace!"
"yes your grace, you called?"
"please call MEGAN."
"a-"
like 😭😭😭YOU DONT WANT ANYTHING FROM THE PPL IN TEYVAT
and even if the real imposter comes back and claims their the real creator , MEGAN would know their bullshitting bc she has that scanner stuff😭‼️
MEGAN will always protect you from any harm and if something even touch you without your permission, their hand is getting cutted off
"MEGAN.. Was that really necessary..?"
"Of course, Its also my duty to make you comfortable at any time _____"
"Right,, but you didn—"
"Shush now, silly _____! I was only protecting you after all we're best friends aren't we?"
Que that person whos trynna touch you screaming in pain in the background🤭‼️
Have this shitty azz drawing❤️Goodbye xoxo
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tachimichishrine · 4 months
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i’ve found someone who writes for tachi?? omg?? you’re writing is so amazing i love it! can i req an x reader where she’s like chuuya’s subordinate in the pm so she’s higher ranking than tachihara but takes an interest in him bc, hello?? who wouldn’t? so she starts to play specific moves that draw them closer together (ngl im thinking mastermind by taylor swift if yk the song) and when they’re finally dating he confesses that he knew what she was doing the whole time? aka intelligent slightly manipulative reader thinking she’s being slick abt it. thank youu!
<welcome to the corner of tumblr where we worship tachi and have no shame about it !!!!!!!!!!! OH FUCK YEAH I love this ask I love the idea and I love you, i've never heard that song before but woah it got my brain juices flowing, sorry it took centuries but here you go luv ♡>
"mastermind"
⫭◦⨝◦⫬
tachihara michizou x fem! chuuya's subordinate! reader
warnings: mention of drugs/alcohol and drink spiking (dont try this at home kids) ; a little bit of gore/torture but it's one sentence ; for some reason there are some elements of kind of sort of yandere!reader that just manifested themselves grgrgr but barely i promiseee ; fluff + plot ; cursing n intended lowercase
it was the middle of the night, and your phone wouldn't stop ringing. you tried snoozing it, turning it on silent but it would keep vibrating on the night table aggressively. against your better judgement, you picked it up and took a look at the caller id.
"boss man 🤏🧍"
well, you couldn't ignore that.
"what the fuck do you want you short little shit, it's 2 in the fucking morning," you grumbled, then cleared your throat before actually pressing the green icon to pick up the line. "hello, boss. is there anything I can-"
"cut the bull, where the hell are you?"
"um, at home? sleeping?" you raised a brow that he couldn't see. "am I supposed to be somewhere?"
"you- forget about it. just get here, now."
now, he was really getting on your nerves. "get where? I can't read your mind, boss, what-"
he hung up.
you didn't have a problem with chuuya in general; he was a decent guy, sometimes. you got assigned to work under him in the fallout of his partner, the famed demon prodigy, disappearing. of course, he didn't want anything to do with you at first, and you would've felt the same if mori wasn't breathing down your neck to keep on it. so, you kept showing up on his missions a few minutes before he arrived, the information already extracted or people already beat to a pulp.
he still wouldn't budge, so you had enough of working so hard just to be his subordinate and exploded at him one day. he could barely get a word in as you yelled loudly and ranted about his inability to accept help. while he was speechless in the aftermath, you just sighed tiredly, handed him your phone number and said that you weren't going away anytime soon and you'd appreciate it if he would just let you work for him already. time passed and eventually you got his trust.
what you didn't get, however, was an explanation for why you were rushing to slide into clothing fit for the outside world and making your way to the port mafia headquarters. it was the only place he could mean, so you ran over there with guns strapped to your thighs and safety off. you had to plan for whatever the hell might've been going on, but all you saw was a nearly empty lobby.
you cursed under your breath, irritated that you busted your ass for no reason. from the corner of your eye, you found a familiar face and approached him.
"hirotsu," you walked over with a pissed expression, "do you know where chuuya is?"
"oh, chuuya isn't here. he told me he'd be sending someone to deal with it," he said following a polite nod of the head. "he needed the black lizard to perform a mission, but he's unavailable tonight. so, he said that he'd send you."
"he's unavailable?" your eyes nearly bulged straight out of your skull, but you caught the slight squint in his face. "oh. he's drunk out of his mind, isn't he?"
hirotsu nodded solemnly. "I'm afraid so. mori only gave him this assignment tonight, and he was already intoxicated when he got the call. I was with him when it happened, so I suggested he call you."
"oh, he so owes me one after tonight," you chuckled, less angry now that you realized he was probably just collapsed on his couch at home and will have the worst hangover the next morning, which you could easily mock him for. well, at least that brightened your mood a little, aside from seeing the black lizard in action. you'd heard of them, ordered massacres through hirotsu but never been there to witness it. that would definitely be fun. "sooo, what exactly do I need to do? just be there or something? yell out 'fire!' like some kind of medieval war commander? 'cause I've always wanted to do that."
the old man was slightly amused by all of your excitement regarding the concept. he said that he just needed someone to be there in case, and you were technically of a higher ranking than he was. you told him that he was such a stickler for hierarchy; he retorted that you sounded like some guy he worked with named tachihara. who that was, you hadn't a clue, but you were assured he'd be there alongside another leader of the battalion.
the rest was a lot less interesting than you thought it would be. you strolled into an abandoned warehouse where the enemy was based with a small army behind you, and you stood there while they lined themselves at your side and waited for your word. you went against your inner child and ordered them to fire in a normal voice rather than a stupidly dramatic one, then you just watched the bodies fall. you glanced at the side to see hirotsu, who was intently scanning his surroundings to make sure there were no tricks. by his side, you saw a masked person and another man who was half-asleep, leaning against the wall.
you fell hard to the sound of gunshots.
maybe it was the way his entire body leaned onto the worn concrete, the way his foot was flattened against the wall and his hips slumped lopsidedly, the way his v-neck plunged down his chest from under his coat, the way his jaw sat tight and clenched despite his slender neck bending backwards to rest the weight of his head behind him. you pulled your gaze off of him since you were afraid of staring, but everyone was already dead and hirotsu was commanding the nameless suits back to hq. the man opened one eye - fuck, they were a glossy amber, some of the prettiest you'd ever seen - and scoffed while he followed them out. he walked like a textbook delinquent, hands in his pockets with awful posture, and you just watched him.
shit, what just happened? you exchanged some brief words with hirotsu as he thanked you for showing up, but all went over your head. you blurted out the question before you could think twice.
"which one of them was tachihara? out of the two who came with us. since, y'know, you were mentioning him earlier..." since, y'know, you couldn't get the picture of your mystery man out of your head and you needed to know his name.
following the affirmation that it was indeed the man with the bandage on his face, you at least had a name as you flopped back into bed at 5 in the morning. you didn't sleep, and you sure as hell couldn't get your heart to stop beating so fast.
something had unhinged inside of you, and all you knew was that you were going to have him.
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"boss, what'd'ya want me to do to 'em?" you yawned, half-asleep as you sat next to the hungover mafioso who was holding some kind of mystery drink in his hand while the other shielded his eyes from the light of day. you came over to his apartment - something which you knew he hated but was in no position to protest right now - and were simultaneously nursing him back to health and being a pain in his ass. "if word gets out that we annihilated the organization but two of their executives are still alive, our rep would take a hit."
"can you shut the fuck up," he groaned, body slumping further onto his fancy kitchen counter while you continued to laugh internally at him and his slightly pathetic situation.
"look, boss, I'll tell you what," you leaned down to his crouched over height and placed a cautious hand on his shoulder, "I'll take care of it. the whole thing. I just need your permission to grab the black lizard if I need 'em for support, but I can make sure it all goes away. and you can just sit today out and spend all day in bed if that's what you want. how does that sound, boss?"
he grumbled and passed out again; you took that as a yes.
you smiled to yourself as you picked up the unconscious body bridal-style, walked over to his bedroom and set him down. he complained loudly in undefined slurring, but you just shushed him and tucked him in under the covers. he was still trying to argue with you when you removed his hat, placed it at his bedside and then gently kissed his forehead and wished him a good nap. it was a little ironic just how much your boss felt like an uncontrollable younger sibling, but you would never say it to his face as you enjoyed the use of your unfractured limbs.
you tiptoed your way out of the apartment and the building, despite being fairly certain that not even an earthquake could disturb his slumber, with parts and pieces of your plan coming together. what you said was true, you did need to take care of those surviving executives. but you didn't really need the black lizard.
you only needed him.
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tachihara heard a gentle cocking of the gun as you glanced in his direction, waiting confirmation that he was indeed ready to storm the facility. you had managed to track down the runaways and corner them in their hideout, and decided you'd call for "backup"; you asked hirotsu for someone who was good with guns and mid-range fighting, since you knew that if you didn't specify, you might end up with the other commander of the black lizard. you didn't like leaving things to chance.
you tilted your head to the side, giving the signal for him to go ahead and sneak down the next hallway. he was eerily good on his feet, light steps as if he were made to be a spy. you did a lot of infiltration work on chuuya's behalf (his face - rather, his short frame - were too easily recognizable on the streets), and every second got you thinking of ways to subtly suggest to him that he provide backup once more on any one of your numerous infiltration missions.
for his part, tachihara didn't seem to be noticing all the coincidences lately. he didn't appear particularly deft or clueless, just indifferent as if he truly couldn't care less. instead of a faint pang in the backrooms of your heart, you felt a sense of challenge, like it was your mission to get him to fall for you because the good things in life are worth fighting for. besides, where's the fun in it if he wasn't playing hard to get?
the mission went by in a blur. you mimicked his mannerisms, ensuring that your movements were perfectly synced with his so that your gunshots felt more like a dance, synchronized bullet ballet. when all was done and the bodies were dropped, you shot him a faint smile.
he raised a brow, perplexed at your joy among the sea of blood, but you began clutching at your chest like he'd shot you with his glare and he chuckled a little bit. you could've sworn you fell in love with him all over again.
"say, I was wondering..." you thought out loud as you crouched down to the body of the target, pulling out a knife from your calf, "are you new? in the port mafia, I mean. I've been here ages and I don't think I would've forgotten someone who shoots like you do."
leaning on the wall while he watched you carve out their skin, peeling off a specific section that had their organization's signature tattoo, tachihara scoffed. "what's it to you?"
"just makin' small talk, don't get your panties in a twist sweetheart," you snickered, albeit screaming a little internally; you didn't expect him to be so resistant. you bagged the proof you needed to show your boss that you got the job done, then rose back to your feet. "alright, we're done here. thanks for the backup."
"wasn't like it was my choice," he rolled his eyes, although you didn't sense any true irritation in his voice. good, this is good, you can work with that.
"wasn't your choice, huh?" you repeated to yourself out loud. "how 'bout this, then: I'm gonna go grab a drink, so it'd be your choice if ya wanted to tag along, no?"
he murmured something about being busy and you tried not to let him see you frown as you walked out.
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this was your fifth "coincidence".
coincidentally, tachihara ended up needing to hand-deliver a message to chuuya, but you coincidentally bumped into him and promised to pass it on. he looked at you a bit suspiciously, but didn't say anything.
coincidentally, you were out drinking with hirotsu on the same day he was going to join the old man. you wouldn't go so far as to say that you played a part in the veteran's sudden diarrhea that left you two alone, but then again it was quite odd that you slipped some sort of substance in his drink right before. not that anyone saw, of course.
coincidentally, weeks of coincidences paid off. every time you'd run into him, need the black lizard or the other way around, he was starting to loosen up. you had a number of inside jokes and he spoke a little more on missions.
this time, you had to go negotiate with a foreign organization from which you imported an important number of your firearms. chuuya was available to go, but you pleaded with him to let you do this on your own, making up some lie about how sending an underling instead of an executive would show them that they are not the ones in control. he seemed skeptical but let you go.
soon afterwards, you whipped out your phone to dial his number.
"it's so unfair!" you complained to tachihara, groaning loudly as you combed through your closet for the right outfit for the occasion. "like I get it, he's busy and all, but dumping a mission on me last minute? sheesh, that's a cheap move, especially from chuuya. I've got 2 hours to figure out what the fuck I'm going to say to these people."
you left the phone on speaker while you pressed dresses against your figure, glancing in the mirror to see if it was the right one. "and it's a big organization, too! I have no idea what I'm going to do if things go south except get my brains blown out."
lies. if things went south, you would easily be able to make your way out unscathed. you were the right hand woman to a port mafia executive, not a scared little girl, but he didn't need to know that right now.
"would'ya like me to tag along? if they see one person, it might look like you were sent as a sacrifice, but if we're two, they'll know we mean business," he offered, as planned. you pumped your fists in the air and contained a squeal.
"hm? oh, you don't need to do that, tachi," you said softly, sliding out of your clothes and into your form-fitting outfit, making sure to check out your ass and reaffirm that you looked stunning. "wait! I'm just kidding," you giggled playfully, "it would mean a lot if you did. thanks."
he chuckled the faintest amount, and you made plans for when and where to meet. you told him that it was a high-end restaurant, so he'd need to wear something fancy enough to blend in, but of course the high-end restaurant was your idea. you'd planned it all in advance, setting up a corner in the back of a place that the mafia had under their thumb and inviting the organization there.
a date, it was a date, and it didn't matter if he didn't know it.
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"you look stunning, dear." he grabbed your hand and kissed the back of it, looking up with soft eyes you'd never have expected. he pulled out a seat for you and called the waiter to get you a cold glass of water.
unfortunately, "he" was the executive from the other organization, not tachihara.
awkwardly, your plus one stood in the corner with the rest of the guards, shooting you occasional glares that basically screamed, "why did I volunteer to do this, again?" you just laughed internally and told yourself that you'd take him out again as a way to make up for it, which was your goal all along. you adored it when all the pieces fell into place.
the negotiations were flawless. the man across the table from you seemed to be very willing to cooperate, and you figured his slight cracks at flirting might've been a part of it. the other part was that he looked positively jet lagged and you might've put a little something in his wine to mellow him out. you were sure he would've reached the same conclusion if he was sober, this was just a harmless little nudge in the right direction.
"10% increase on the price for a 20% increase on the quantity of firearms imported, then," you reiterated, smiling sweetly at him while he agreed to double what someone in their right mind would ask for. "lovely doing business with you, sir. I'm glad this didn't have to escalate."
he smiled softly, offering you his hand to help you up then nodding his head towards the exit so his goons would follow him out. you looked at the piece of paper he'd slid into your palm, a phone number etched into it, then watched him looking back at you with a wink. for a moment, you could've sworn you'd almost forgotten about tachihara.
"that was boring as fuck," he strolled over to you, clicking his tongue as he complained about his feet hurting from standing there for so long, saying that he wouldn't have worn a goddamn suit and tagged along if he knew all he would be doing is watching you flirt with some guy."
"that," you stressed, pocketing the number but trying not to think about it, "was not flirting. if I was whoring myself out for the mafia, believe me I'd put myself down with my own hand."
"oh yeah? brave words for a woman with a dress that tight on her ass," he scoffed, crossing his arms before he realized what he'd just said.
"tachi, you lookin' at my ass?"
he seemed at a loss for words, huffing angrily as he walked out and you laughed to yourself. he was so cute when he got angry.
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tachihara michizou was not an idiot.
he, however, did not know what to make of your behaviour towards him.
all these run-ins, all your conveniently-timed missions where you were down one person, every text you seemed to send at the perfect time. he knew your gaze lingered on him and he knew that you wore that dress for him, but he couldn't be sure about it.
confirmation came when he was casually chatting with chuuya over drinks.
"my damn subordinate has been so fucking weird lately," the executive slurred, gesturing for another glass while he toyed with the empty one. "reminds me of that fucking dazai... always plotting some kind of shit..."
"she sounded kind of pissed with you 'cause of that last gig with the firearms dealers," he retorted before downing his shot and slamming his fist on the counter out of adrenaline. "since you dumped it on her."
"huh?! the fuck you mean, dump it on her? she was practically beggin' me for that job, said she didn't want any backup either. I'm telling you, tachi, that chick's gone mad."
so it was a lie, when you called him, complaining. he wondered what else was a lie, but then he wondered why you would lie about that.
as if on cue, a message popped up on his phone with your name on it.
"are you free tonight?"
so he wasn't imagining things. for some reason, it got his heart beating, thinking about the fact that someone would do that for him. but, before he could respond, another ping:
"I got shot sorry lol I have no idea why I made it sound like I was asking you out. could you bring a first aid kit or something? thanks a ton!!"
he concluded on the fact that you were confusing, and that he wouldn't say anything about it, especially since you probably think you're incredibly slick about it. instead, tachihara excused himself from a very drunk chuuya and said he had to go.
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"ow, ow, ow! fuck, why don't you just pour the whole damn bottle on there, while you're at i- fuck!"
the whining was hard. you had to do it manually, making sure you actually sounded like you were in pain when really, your "fever" was from all the heat of feeling tachihara's hands on you as he dabbed the wound.
ironically enough, this wasn't planned. you genuinely did fuck up, the man you never called seemed to want revenge because he sent a few people to kidnap you. you only got grazed while you took care of all the henchmen, but it still hurt like a little bitch.
he was the first place your mind went to, as always. you managed to get yourself home but you couldn't reach the spot on the bottom of your ribcage where it sliced open without feeling a lot of pain.
and so, you just turned it into an opportunity to get him in your house, sitting on your couch, his hands on your skin that was barely covered by your shirt. the alcohol he was pouring onto the wound hurt but you couldn't feel anything except pure ecstacy.
"say, you're not bad at this," you fake winced as he pinched the skin together and just put a bunch of superglue on it. "you got... gah, you got experience as a medic or somethin'?"
"how exactly did this happen?" he ignored your question and instead helped you up slightly so he could wrap the bandages around your torso.
"remember the guy from the other night? well, he gave me his number and I never called, so he got butthurt and sent some goons to fuckin' kidnap me. or kill me, I'm not sure. I didn't really pause to ask 'em."
he looked as if he almost didn't believe you, pulling down your shirt and gently tapping on the spot he bandaged. "there, you're all set."
"thanks again," you smiled at him, groaning a bit as you sat upright. "I know it's late and you were probably doing some other shit."
then a slight pause. "if you want to crash on my couch instead of walkin' home, I don't mind."
the walk wasn't long, and he didn't feel tired at all, but he didn't tell you that. he just helped you walk over to your bed then got himself comfortable on your sofa.
you'd never been happier to get shot. maybe the universe was finally on your side, in its own weird way.
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the wound was fully healed and tachihara was yours.
it was the perfect excuse to him check on you, to have him come over and stay over as "protection in case someone tries to kill you again". both of you knew your excuse was bullshit, your plotting to get him by your side so painfully obvious now that he was getting closer and closer to you. by the time he was making visits on his own and smiling at you in the hallways at the port mafia, you didn't need to do anything anymore.
it was a wordless confession; both of you walking in the streets at night, going nowhere and not saying much. it was cold and you could see both of your breaths swirling in the air. you blinked and suddenly your faces were close, too close, and your body was leaning in on its own. his lips tasted like something your mind could've never guessed.
nevertheless, you were still addicted.
something about the kiss felt effortless, too. like you didn't need to do anything, say anything to get him to wrap his hands around your hips and pull you in close. this was the way it should be, easy and effortless. like you could wait patiently and he'd fall in love with you all on his own.
"have you seen my holster?" he called out weeks later as you laid down on your couch, reading a book as he looked around for the item.
"it's over here!" you called out, the holster expertly hidden in between the cushions because you wanted him to come over to you and find it. as he walked over to you, watching you wave it while dangling on your finger, a teasing look on your features.
"you're a conniving little shit, you know that?" he sighed with a soft smile, glancing at your hands as you set down the book by your side then sitting by your side. "if you wanna talk to me, you can ask like a regular person, y'know?"
his wide smirk as he looked at you pout, wrapping your arms around his shoulders as you fake-sobbed into his chest. "you're so mean, thinking I'm lying!"
he grabbed your chin, gaze directly settling onto you with a look that said not to bullshit him. "you think I don't notice? when you kept bumping into me, us getting paired up on missions, even that time you said chuuya 'dumped' that job on you? yeah, you're cute but you're not a great liar."
you furrowed your brows. "if you knew, why didn't you say anything?"
"'cause I wanted you to tell me yourself."
"asshole," you pouted, laughing as you leaned towards him and kissed the tip of his nose. "I just didn't think... never mind, it worked, didn't it?"
he rolled over, laying you down on the couch and settling himself on top of you, making sure you were trapped. "being all cryptic now, aren't we?"
"maybe," you muttered between kisses, wrapping your legs around his hips and pulling him deeper. "... maybe... maybe you were just... I dunno, so pretty, and I thought 'fuck, he'd never go for me' and... I don't know, it's not important..."
"aw, look at you, gettin' all soft 'n mushy," he chuckled into your neck, smiling at your words while his teeth graze the tip of your earlobe. "keep talking 'bout how out of your league that I am."
"oh, shut up," you whispered, grabbing a handful of his hair and bringing his lips back onto yours so he would stop talking. "I'm tryin to open up here, you smug dipshit."
he grinned as his hand went down in between your thighs, parting them and opening up your legs. "I like the sound of that."
you squealed playfully and rolled him over, but the couch wasn't wide enough and you both fell onto the floor with a dull thud and a frenzy of laughter.
"seriously, though," he brushed your hair out of your face and pulled your hips so you were snug on him while you caught your breath and lowered yourself to kiss him again, "you're talkin' nonsense, baby."
"mmn, if you say so," rolled right onto his tongue. you believed his words, or maybe you didn't, but it barely mattered. he was here now, in your arms and telling you everything you wanted to hear. he said that he knew of your antics, yet the truth was that he couldn't do a damn thing about it if he wanted to.
all because you're a mastermind.
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hella1975 · 7 months
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hiiii haha. hello. exceptionally awkward introduction bc idrk how to start something like this so let's just jump right in. im taking a break from this account for a bit. i know i said i wanted taob out before halloween and currently im fine sticking with that deadline, but if i decide i need longer away then i will take longer away. every time ive reassured people that id never abandon a fic and updates will always come eventually i never once considered that my writing and ability to feel safe and comfortable on this site would be actively taken from me, so im not even going to apologise. i dont want this either and more importantly i dont fucking deserve it. i dont know what it is in the past year, if ive hit a certain amount of followers or 'popularity' that's made it so the natural ratio of positive to negative interactions must in turn go up, but there's been a serious uptick in weird asks for me. the annoying part is that a very small amount of them are actually objectively mean and hateful, the rest are just weird and invasive from people who seemingly dont realise that's what they're being. ive reached a point where i dont care if the intentions are good. it's not my job as a 20 year old tumblr user of all things to defend the morality of someone who couldnt even bother to come off anon. unfortunately, after blocking only one or two anons, the weird asks have decreased substantially, which says all you need to know about the fascinating and exhilarating lives led by these people, but ive also gone on to turn anon asks off entirely. this is something i actively fought against doing and had to be pushed into by my mutuals (who have been the coolest people on planet earth during this entire thing). turning off anon was a big deal to me even if it sounds silly. i felt betrayed and like id been backed into a corner because it was so vehmently something i DIDNT WANT that to feel like i had to do it anyway for my own mental health??? that sucks. so even though ive 'fixed' the problem, im still kind of reeling and uncomfortable every time i come on tumblr. i hope it's just something i need time to ease because i'll truly be devastated if this becomes 'ruined' for me. tumblr exists as the only place in the world where i am honestly every facet of myself without shame or hesitation; losing that would be insanely harmful to me. and to the people who cant appeal to the actual human behind the post, let me put that in words you can understand: we wouldn't get any more writing 😦😦😦 riots and fires and sirens, i know. so yeah. to anyone who has sent me an anon ask and you're now wondering if you were part of the problem, im firmly of the belief that you'll know if you are. when i say 'weird asks' i dont mean 'you sent me a para about your personal life just to vent or ask for advice' or 'you sent me a really deep emotional compliment about the impact me and/or my writing has had on you' - i love asks like that, so much that i put off taking a break and turning off anon solely for the joy they bring me. im sorry that it might feel like you're being punished too bc of the actions of what in reality is a HANDFUL of weird people, but this is what i feel like i have to do to feel safe and not go insane every time i log in. love you guys, hopefully ill see you soon x
#seriously another shout out to my mutuals#id particularly like to say thank you to boom who's always right there for me no matter what's happening or how insane im being#and also everyone in our little discord that wound up having to make a whole new channel for venting#bc i was there so often like 'today's weird ask isssss.... telling me about my cupsize!! rip them to shreds!!!'#hannah and theo especially being there and pushing me to finally turn off anon. war is truly over#and of course rori bc the shamelessness u show when hating on my anon asks has been genuinely really cathartic#sometimes u really do just need a rottweiler mutual to tell random people online to kill themselves 😭#okay weird oscar acceptance speechcore gratitude over. i do just rlly love my mutuals#like i went three years not telling anyone about the worse side of internet popularity for fear of looking spoiled and ungrateful#so for the first time to open up about it and be met with outrage on my behalf and people saying in fact it's MORE fucked up#than i initially realised bc ive grown desensitised to it is. yeah cathartic i guess#they are singlehandedly reassuring me of the good this cursed app still holds#so everyone thank them and send them flowers NOW#okay im done i think. see you guys soon. i truly do want to come back asap bc like i said i NEVER EVEN WANTED TO FUCKING LEAVE#SOME ASSHOLES JUST HAD TO PUT GRENADES ON WHAT I ASSUMED WERE VERY UNIVERSAL AND OBVIOUS BOUNDARIES#if you're reading this like 'ohhh fuck i defo sent something invasive lately. i thought it was a joke/we were friends'#then 1) we arent friends if you're on anon. it immediately creates a power imbalance where you know me and any necessary context#but i have no idea who you are or how much you know about me. that's already a fucked dynamic#and 2) I HOPE YOU FEEL BAD. LIKE GENUINELY I HOPE YOU FEEL AWFUL AND HAVE A GOOD LONG LOOK AT YOURSELF#okay i think that's all. ta-ra lads??? how tf do u end something like this#ive queued this to reblog a couple more times throughout the day
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ace-of-d1am0nds · 7 months
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burrow's end having two paladins has got me in my paladins brainrot again specifically how to not make ur paladin just a fucking fantasy cop.
ok ok ok i hear u whats this silly little punk doing here talking abt fuck cops on main like this. so here's my deal. paladins, like og build paladins, are just made to be wizard cops. serve and protect and all that shit. more importantly, in the world created by dnd5e paladins of pelor are like literally just an occupying police force (IN MY OPINION DONT FUCKING COME FOR ME THERES A BETTER POINT TO THIS I PROMISE IM GETTING THERE)
but paladins that don't follow standard builds? make me lose my absolute goddamn mind. a player in the campaign I'm running rn is playing a werewolf oath of redemption paladin. and who is he a paladin to? THE FUCKING MOON
viola in burrow's end being a paladin who worships the concept. of protecting her husband and her people??? chefs fucking kiss
its so easy to fall into the standard build for paladins but they're slowly becoming one of my favorite archetypes especially when you get creative with the backstories
so sorry end of rant
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gayfanservice · 9 months
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Hello! I have a request for you but please take your time there is no rush!
Can you please to Ushiwaka (Tendou’s nickname for him) with a male reader who loves physical touch but in public places get super overwhelmed? Like something i find really cute and something that i find special is when im overwhelmed ill lock pinkies with my partner. Nothing more nothing less just our pinkies. It feels extra special to me because its like you just are pinky promising to stay together forever but you guys are also giving each other physical touch.
Sorry if this is really long! Thank have a good day! :)
It’s not long at all! Perfect length, if I do say so myself. There’s only a couple of requests that are too long for my liking (like the twins + older brother, please don’t make requests this length. Please.)
*********
Chatter and sounds of utensils filled the cafeteria air as Wakatoshi and (Y/N) comfortably sat beside each other. The quiet pair barely chatted, merely basking in each others presence as they occasionally glanced at each other. The comfortable silence broken by none other than Tendō, Wakatoshi’s school best friend, dropping his poor tray onto the table as he quickly sat down, Semi following suit.
“Ushiwaka, (L/N)! Good morning!” The brightly haired fellow basically yelled, a smile on his face as Semi looked semi-dead. Poor man must’ve not gotten enough sleep to deal with Tendō’s shit this early in the morning.
Wakatoshi acknowledged them with a simple ‘Morning,’ while (Y/N) let out an inaudible hum. He loved hanging with friends, but the cafeteria was always his least favorite place. The loud people, buzzing lights, and all around noises were too much for his brain to handle. The only reason he actually shows up is because he needs food, and Wakatoshi, who also needs food. He’d only been in there for close to twenty minutes and his brain was already feeling foggy. It was beginning to be too much.
(Y/N) listened to three different conversations; some girl talking about a bad break up, a group of friends talking about what to do for the upcoming weekend, something about murder, which is probably about a video game. Probably. The clashing sounds of lights and chatter were getting to his head, no longer able to listen to Tendō’s hyper-fixation ramble on his newest manga series. His breathing quickened, chest feeling cold as his head slightly twitched every which way.
Wakatoshi glanced over at (Y/N), noticing the spaced out look on his face and his subtle twitching. He linked their pinkies with a squeeze, a subtle question wondering if (Y/N) was fine. He quickly settled his gaze back onto his tray. He felt (Y/N) squeeze a couple times; a special thing they did together instead of saying words was tapping or squeezing whatever they held of the other. One for no, two for yes, and three for ‘I love you’. It was perfect communication between two non-sociable human beings.
(Y/N) felt better, knowing someone he trusts is with him. His chest felt warm as he thought about how much Wakatoshi cares about him. (Y/N) could make it to the end with him.
Wakatoshi finished his tray as well as (Y/N), deciding it was time to head back to their dorms and away from people. The two stood, waving goodbye at Tendō and Semi, and placed their trays in the respective area before they made their way back to whoever’s dorm popped up first, pinkies intertwined once again.
The walk was quiet, neither really speaking as they walked through the long hallway filled with different doors. Wakatoshi’s door eventually came up. The two settled inside, the morning sun dimly lighting up the room through Wakatoshi’s curtains. As soon as the door closed (Y/N) wrapped his arms around Wakatoshi, chest to back. His cheek coddled into Wakatoshi, instantly feeling better as Wakatoshi held his hands. The two didn’t talk as they embraced, gentle smiles on both of their faces as they relaxed into each others, and only each others, presence.
*********
Bet you dont even remember making this request lmao
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chaosandthe-deadblog · 4 months
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hi i’m that one person who was upset about a sonadow sex joke you made. let me preface by saying i’m not here to argue or scare you but to apologize.
you don’t have to respond to this at ALL i just saw your blog name and felt guilty for hurting you.
im sorry about upsetting you and reacting the way i did. i still think its eugh and everything. but i just get upset when people make jokes about that with characters previously stated to be minors because of personal trauma and people sexualizing me as a kid and just morals in general. of course i know that i can’t control how people enjoy their stuff, and i know it’s going to exist regardless. but i want to at least know if who im interacting with is someone i don’t want to talk to due to being a proshipper or whatever stuff like that.
i wasn’t trying to ‘cancel’ you or anything. i was upset and said something in the moment. i’m sorry. i should have just unfollowed and moved on. i should’ve saw the human i knew behind the screen but what i could only think of was a random person i didn’t know. i’m really sorry.
well, anon, i accept your apology. but also i dont. so let's take this one by one, okay?
first of all. you're still wrong, and i'm still angry.
it wasnt a "sex joke", i was commenting on a uquiz someone else made, because i found the sheer fact that sonadow of all ships was included in that quiz to be really funny. not to mention, the uquiz was based on statistics from ao3, and i guessed the correct answer by just knowing how shipping culture works. i thought this was funny. you know, people are allowed to find suggestive humor funny, even if you're uncomfortable with it, anon.
but i'll humor you. lets say i was doing the things i got accused of doing. big deal. i don't think you're wrong for being upset, much less for being uncomfortable, but one: could've settled this over dms, two: not everyone is you. not everyone is uncomfortable. not everyone cares so much. i didn't give that joke more than two seconds of thought, you clearly did, and i don't think you're wrong for that, i think it wasn't my problem.
secondly, and this will sound horrible, but (like i said) your discomfort isn't something i (the people running that oc poll, and my followers, by the way) needed to know about. i hear you, anon, and i'm sorry that all that happened to you. i understand the discomfort. but, like i said, we could've settled this in private, you could've at least told me which mutual you were, and no one else had to know.
third: i am not a proshipper, and i don't appreciate that you're still calling me gross, by the way. this isn't an apology if you're not accepting you were wrong. i'll humor you again and say that i was doing what you say i was doing: it is not that serious to me, and i don't like being called gross for something that is just plain, morally neutral weird (not good, not bad, neutral weird)
and fourth: thank you for at least recognizing what you should've done. however you didn't do that. from what i understand, based on what happened shortly after your anon, you went to the person running that sonic oc poll (which, whatever, i was losing anyway), and you lied about what i was doing to get me kicked out. good on you for realizing that was wrong. but you know, i'm still angry. im banned from many fandom events now because you couldn't just unfollow me. so i'm glad you realized it was wrong, i accept your apology, but i'm still very much angry with you.
i'm glad you're sorry, i'm glad you're recognizing i'm a human being (okay?) and i'm glad you at least tried to apologize. don't call me gross, apologize for real, and next time don't do this to someone through tumblr anon over whats essentially a common ocurrence on the sonic fandom, and every other fandom
(by the way, even if we weren't mutuals, you shouldnt do something like this to "a random person you don't know" either, but what do i know right? and "because of my trauma" isn't an excuse, because by that logic you also generated trauma in me, because now i'm fucking paranoid about everything i fucking post. i can thank you for that.)
have a nice day.
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by the way
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cowboyjen68 · 6 months
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hi jen, i just followed you and this is really random but ive seen some of your posts helping younger people and it really struck a cord and i need to just let the words fall out of me.
ive been having issues with my girlfriend she cheated on me but this situation is very complicated and we're both fucked up people but i know she still loves me and i really love her. but my anxiety and our lack of communication is really bad right now and im so worried she might not love me the same anymore
ontop of this im 18 and for the past id say 5ish years my mental health and family life has been getting worse, getting diagnosis is hard especially with mentally ill and just overall bad parents that somehow dont understand or believe. i know im deppresed and have been i have anxiety, sever paranoia maybe bpd and bipolar and autism and everything is just so much. now the one person i had is something thats making everything hurt more and i just don't know where to go, im trying to get help but its so slow in this country and i feel so lost and tired i barely eat now and when i do its ether rare or unhealthy and everything is so much i want to collapse.
i hope this isn't to much to randomly send anonymously but you just seem really kind and helpful. thank u for your reply if you do
HI and please accept my apologies for the delay on answering this. I am sorry you are going through so much. My kids are adopted from foster care and I had many kids in my home for up to 5 years who eventually went back home. That is to say I have a lot of experience with mental illness, the systems that treat them, trauma and kids who came from unstable home lives.
At the ripe old age of 18 you have plenty of time to find love and contentment but right now might not be the time. I understand there might be odd circumstances that caused your girlfriend to cheat on you. If you feel betrayed and lost trust that is a feeling that is next to impossible to overcome for people with no comorbidities let alone a teen trying to figure herself out and deal with navigating the broken mental health/care system.
It is actually quite normal for young love to change and get redefined into friendship even when the circumstance are the best. Her cheating on you might very well be a sign that your relationship is in flux and not what you thought it was. A romance that has run its course is not a failure, relationships do not have to last forever to be important and real and worth having had.
It might be scary to think of not being with her, of not having your "one" person that you can count on but I do believe you can get farther working on yourself if you put time and energy into you and not dividing it up between you and her.
There is a lot of precedent set for women to set aside their romance and intimacy in order to be just friends while one or both does some work on herself. Sometimes it is necessary to stay involved for emotional support or financial support, that is just the reality of our world. Living single can be very difficult.
Please consider letting go of the relationship in its current form and putting your energy of yourself. Letting go of the stress of trying to repair what you had with her will remove so much pressure from you and from her that you will feel much more ready to tackle your mental state.
I promise. You are not a failure, she is not "the bad guy" in this story. Take all the wonderful things you shared with her keep those with you when you want a reminder that it loving her was worth your time even if it didn't end like you planned.
Seek mental health help but starting small. A therapist can help you begin to talk through things and often she can help you find additional resources like a medical Dr, public subsidies for insurance or free clinics to assist you in getting medication and mental health support. Most counties have a social services office and those employees are a wealth of information.
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fetish4juggalos · 2 years
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Gotham villains with their s/o
Breif introduction into other media I enjoy posting for other than horror I LOVE DC
I plan to make another villans post once I get further into the series maybe with jervis and Jeremiah and some updated headcannons for these 3 but for now enjoy some small gotham content
Sorry for any spelling mistakes and grammatical errors in advance
Oswald Cobblepot
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He follows you around. Not in a creepy "you cant go anywhere" way but in a clingy wanting to be around you type of way
If the two of you are sitting on the couch and you just randomly get up to stretch or leave the room he'll have this look of utter confusion and quickly(as best cas he can)get up from where hes seated to catch up to you
Has victor check up on you while youre at home or walking around gotham to make sure you are safe. That includes to and from work
He is completely obsessed with the idea of you ONLY being his. The idea that you dated others or that you have exs irks something in him
If any of the patrons at the club hit on you or touch you in any way that he deems inappropriate he'll shut it down immediately. If hes too busy to deal with it on the spot he'll make sure victor does
He has some anger management issues so he often freaks out but if he sees that you're nervous or scared he'll break down into apology on the spot
Hes a sweetheart though and always trys to make you happy by giving you gifts and making sweet gestures as Apologies
Crys to you about his insecurities and how he believes he doesn't deserve you and how everyone thinks hes a pushover-
More into cuddles then anything but the idea you want to be sexually involved with him makes him a whole other type of happy
Loves kissing you in private since it feels more affectionate and passionate but isnt apposed to the idea of kissing you infront of everyone to prove a point
Victor Zsasz
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Hovers over you while youre minding your business. If youre cooking or cleaning he'll be behind you looking over your shoulder or seeing what your'e up to
Doesn't necessarily like your exs but as long as they dont come asking for you back or harassing you hes fine with the idea that you have dated other people even if it means he'll have to one up them in everything
Likes when you clean his wounds and bandage him. He has a crazy high pain tolerance but even if the wound is only like a 5/10 on the pain scale he'll play it up for sympathy points
Even if hes chill about you having dated other ppl in the past he'll go from 0 to 100 if he finds out an ex is still trying to contact you or show up at your apartment. You wont see _______ ever again
Refers to you as his spouse even if you aren't married. "My wife and I-", "Im going to go spend time with my husband", "me and my spouse-". He'll probably never stop but you never asked him to so its kinda became a pet name over time
Likes kissing whenever. He loves making out after work or hanging out with you on the couch and being affectionate but if you two are infront of the zsaszettes or in the club he loves kissing there too. Probably finds all kinds of ways to goof off at work with you
Has a pretty sick sense of humor so if hes done with a particularly gorey job he'll bring home a trophy to freak you out with. Maybe a eye or a hand assuming youre desensitized to that stuff since you are dating victor zsasz
He sleeps freakishly less then the average human probably bc of years of work and self discipline but if youre asleep when he gets home from work he'll slip into bed with you even if hes not tired
Hes just a bit creepy so I dont doubt he watches you sleep sometimes. Probably takes photos of you asleep to piss you off and to keep in his camera role. Then if you ask abt the pics he'll stand there like "😦" "how did those get there?"
Jerome Valeska
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Whenever jerome does something for you he always makes sure its extravagant. His gifts always tend to be big gestures and whether thats him killing a bunch of civilians and spelling your name with their bodies or some expensive thing he stole that he'd thought you'd like really depends on his mood
With all the crime and chaos hes committing he really doesn't have his own place so staying at yours a "seemingly innocent" civilian is the best bet. And boy does he love your place. He has only a handful of personal items he keeps there but when hes laying low and staying over multiple days at a time he is at his happiest
Yall cant really go on dates or in public outings since you not being publicly involved with him is kinda apart of his whole laying low idea and also bc of the whole wanted criminal thing so house dates are a go to
He enjoys spooning you and maybe its bc he didn't get alot of love as a child but its one of his favorite cuddling positions
Hes scary when hes upset but if he sees any body language or facial expressions that show that you are scared of him he'll be quick to remind you that he'd never hurt you unless you wanted him too
As far as exs go hes another one that doesn't like the idea that you were with anybody other then him. It pisses him off that he didn't find you before you had a chance to waste your time with other assholes. If an ex however came anywhere close to you he'd know before you did bc he would have already dealt with it.
All the pet names he has for you are normally complements along the lines or gorgeous, handsome, cutie, and whatever he can come up with to make you smile
He also takes pictures of you without your knowledge to add to his camera role or just to have laying around somewhere but if you find one of those pics around the house and ask where it came from he'll just smile and shrug
Dances with you whenever he finds the opportunity. He was in the circus so I dont doubt that he has some experience dancing or performing. He sometimes puts on a little show with you as if you were infront of an audience with his best preformers voice. Even if its just in the kitchen or in the living room its fun and he loves to see you laugh
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rileebilee · 1 year
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𝐢𝐤𝐤𝐢𝐜𝐨𝐧 - 𝐢𝐬𝐚𝐚𝐜𝐰𝐡𝐲
isaacwhy x reader oneshot . . .
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hii, im mars and yes!! i am a isaacwhy fan/groupchat fan!! and i do write on wattpad but im on tumblr a bit often and see very few isaacwhy stories / oneshots so here i am! this is from my oneshot fanfic on wattpad, so if u wanna see it its here!! (https://www.wattpad.com/1315770424-the-group-chat-oneshots-ikkicon-isaacwhy-x-reader) ive removed some things from here, but not big changes!! ˚ · • . ° .˚ · • . ° .
fem!reader (sorry!!), she/her prns, any cosplay u want for this :)
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i fixed my hair, making sure nothing was wrong. i had shorts on under the dress so i wasnt flashing people (erm!!) and i had thigh-high socks on. i could hear the others screaming from below me, giving me the idea we were gonna go soon. i walked down stairs, checking the time to make sure i wasnt done early. i saw the others run from out of the hallway and getting chased by larry, whoo was looking at my like a little baby thats fucking mesmerized, so were the others.
"what?" i asked them, seeing them all snap out of it. "and we though isaac was hot?" tanner joked, making all the others laugh. i see them all run to isaacs room like little girls having drama to tell others.
i walked into the room, to see them all "diamond testing" isaacs necklaces, i smiled under my mask (yes i made u fucking readers faceless also, deal with it shitheads) when isaac pushed yumi away, he didnt make the beeping sound the next time, making then all run after isaac. i start laughing, putting my phone in my bag and setting it down by isaacs bed. i saw isaac run into the laundry riom as the others ran to the stairs, he ran into his room abd locjed the door quickly. "hey" he looked at me, smiling and putting his weight on the door. "hi" i smiled to him, taking off my mask for a moment. breathing in and out. i was nervous for this convention. really. fucking. nervous.
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once we got there, which i was riding with isaac and larry, and yumi, tanner, and nick were together. i grabbing my bag and got out with isaac. i was about the dame height as him, but a little bit shorter. and larry was looking up at me, like i was a goddess or something.. we all went in and started looking around i got stopped by a few people, so did the others. they all started complementing my cosplay and saying they liked my videos. after we finished with that we went over to these 3 people and started asking them random questions, yum started with a take it or double it for the next person, and isaac started asking them to rate his outfit, and i started telling them if they followed me on tiktok ill take them anywhere they want. once we were all done, nick had the idea to make larry go up and annoy them more. "this is not gonna end well." i said to isaac, looking up and him a bit. he smiled and me and i put my head on his shoulder, i couldnt do this alot unless i had my boots on, but it was nice once in a while. "ay love birds, stop loooking at each other and watch larry" nick looked at us both, staring us down before looking at larry again. we glanced at each other for the last time and looked at larry, who was getting held down by the group of whatever theh were. me and isaac started giggling at him while tanner joined in with us. nick was trying to hold back his laughing since he was recording. larry showed them the money and one of them yelled that they dont want it. they let go of him and nick ran over to him, recording him
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we all started splitting up in groups, me, isaac, and nick in one group. then it was larry, tanner in the other. we all went different ways to go interview some people. we got stopped by these people outside nick and me started giggling because isaac walked up to us and explained what happened
"dude they fucking walked up to me and started asking if i was smii7y.." he loked over to them and waved. we saw the others walking towards us, they told us that there was a group of people over there at their gonna interview, me and isaac had the idea to interupt their interview. we ran up and started asking random mixed quesitons.
"who the fuck are you?" yumi asked "ay uh, 10 dollars or uh smash or pass?" isaac asked, trying to not giggling "smash or pash or double it and give it to the next person". we all started just asking questions and they all kept answering them.
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we were on our way home and i felt a hand slip onto my thigh, i looked over and smiled at isaac, seeing him focused on the road. i looked back over, grabbing my phone from my bag. i checked my twitter, seeing all the pictures i was tagged in. i smiled at one of the pictures with me, isaac, and nick. i put my phone down, glancing at isaac through the corner of my eye. i saw him looking at me. i looked over at him also, grinning.
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once we got home, i ran up to my room to remove my cosplay. i heard a knock of my door, i changed into my shirt and shorts quickly and opened it. "hi" isaac mumbled, hugging me, "hi." i smiled into his chest. closing my eyes. i sighed, feeling him let go. "come on" he grabbed my arm, dragging me to his room. he made me lay down with him, feeling his arms slither around me. bringing me into his chest, i closed my eyes and sighed. "i love you." he mumbled into my ear, "i love you too." i smiled, feeling his arms tighten around me, i felt my eyelids get heavier, closing them for a moment, and next we both fell asleep.
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