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mynameisnotfiveweenies · 9 months

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Red String - Katsuki Bakugou x fem!reader

Summary = When you turn 16, a red string wraps around your finger and leads you to your soulmate. What happens when it is the person who has bullied you and your brother, Izuku, for years?

Soulmates were amazing, knowing that this person was made for you, made to be with you for life. In theory, it was like a dream come true. In practice, maybe not so much.

Well, maybe if it was someone else rather than Katsuki Bakugou it would have been easier.

Me and Katsuki grew up together. Me and Izuku are twins which meant being around Katsuki. We were all close for a while until he got his quirk. I got my quirk around the same time but Izuku did not. He was quirkless. Katsuki did not like that. I did not like how Katsuki had turned sour towards Izuku. This lead to many arguments and burns from Katsuki whenever I stood up to him.

Then, suddenly, Izuku had a quirk. It was weird. He had always been small but ever since he helped Katsuki when that villain attack happened, he began training like crazy. He joined me on runs, lifting weights like I've never seen.

We went to the entrance exams together and he, impossibly, had a quirk. I confronted him and he told me about All For One. It was hard to understand at first but it made him happy so I did not question it too much. He will finally be the hero he has always been destined to be.

Now, when the quirks began to come a thing, so did soulmates. When you turn 16, suddenly a red string appears on your little finger. The end of the string connects you to your soulmate. It was an incredible phenomenon, much like the quirks. This meant divorce was almost 0% and the population was better off.

I felt ... strange about the soulmate situation. I was excited at the prospect of having someone who was made for you but it was scary thinking it could be anyone. It could be a murder, a creep - it could be absolutely any one and I had no control over it.

Second year at UA came around quicker than I could ever imagine. Time seemed to move faster and before I knew it, it was April and Katsuki's birthday was fast approaching.

Throughout the years, Katsuki has grown and even became my friend. It was hard. He was mean and confused about Izuku's sudden quirk but when he found out about One For All, he changed. He apologised to Izuku for everything and then apologised to me. It was hard for me to forgive him but I did it.

Now, his sixteenth birthday was a few days away and I was scrambling around the mall to find something. He is impossible to buy for. What do you get someone who has everything he wants?

I decided to go by myself to get him a gift, needing all the time to really think about it. When I asked him what he wanted he told me to 'not bother'. But, I wanted to. When we were children I used to make him a card every year and wanted to make up for all the missed years.

After four hours, I managed to find him something.

When I walked through the dorm, I ran into him and quickly hide the bag behind my back.

His eyes narrowed suspiciously. "What's that?"

I repressed my smile the best I could (not at all). "Nothinggg." I sang.

He slowly began to approach me and I backed up.

He snarled, "It better not have been expensive."

It was a bit out of my budget but he didn't need to know what. I rolled my eyes, "Just appreciate the present, grumpy."

I bopped his nose before running off into my room, successful in hiding it.

At dinner, everyone was asking him how he felt about finding out his soulmate. He blew up, so no one asked again.

It was weird, to think Katsuki could be soulmates with anyone. It could be a random stranger off the street, it could be someone in our class. Every time I thought about it, my chest felt very tight. I didn't want to think too much about it.

His birthday came and I had everyone help cook a big breakfast.

Katsuki came down, after Izuku got him out of bed and looked sheepishly at the effort we made.

I took the plate of waffles and brought them over to him. He was sat, waiting.

He looked over to me as I approached and the face he made almost made me drop the plate. His mouth was partly open, his eyes slightly wide and he looked at my hands holding the waffles. I admit, it was a lot of waffles but the reaction was something I was not expecting.

I smiled as I put the plate in front of him, his eyes did not leave the plate until I put it in front of him and then his eyes went up to my face. "Happy birthday Kat!" I cheered, clapping my hands together.

He did not look away from my face but his face spread into a small smile, "You did all of this?"

I shrugged, "Everyone helped."

He looked around at the class surrounding the tables, all tucking in. "Thank you." He said it quietly but I heard.

He spent the rest of his birthday with Kirishima and his family (they went to a concert I believe). At the end of the day, we all gathered in the boys living room. The TV was on but no one was watching it.

I sat on the floor, chatting until I heard Kaminari talk to Katsuki.

"So?" He asked excitedly. "Do you know your soulmate?"

Katsuki was silent for a while. Luckily my back was to him or he would realise I was listening. "Nah, it goes too far to follow it."

The breath I didn't know I was holding released. I didn't know how I felt. I was relived it wasn't someone I knew but to know he had someone and could go find them whenever he wanted filled me with a strange sense of dread.

Tsu must have read my face as she asked me if I was okay. I snapped out of it and nodded, maybe a bit too enthusiastically to be believable. "Yeah, I just think I'm gonna go to bed."

I got up, said goodnight to everyone and began to walk. When I got to elevator to go up to the girls floor, the sound of someone walking towards me made me look up.

Katsuki was dressed in an all black tracksuit and walked towards me with his hands in his pockets.

"Hey," I greeted.

"Hey, you okay?" He asked, looking down at me.

I nodded, a small smile on my face. "I'm okay, just tired." As the elevator dinged I suddenly remembered. "Oh! I didn't give you your present!"

I grabbed his arm and dragged him into the elevator. He opened his mouth to protest, "Come to my room and I'll give it to you." He was quiet then so I pressed to button to go up.

I asked him about the concert and he spoke animatedly about the rap artist I have only heard coming from his bedroom but he seemed to have a good time.

"Okay," I said, opening the door. "Sit and don't move."

"Yes ma'am." He said mockingly but my stomach whirled anyway.

I retrieved the box from my bedside table and sat beside him. He looked down curiously.

I was suddenly nervous, what if it was too much or he didn't like it? Too late.

I gave him the box. He took it and then opened it, looking down with wide eyes.

"I saw it and knew I had to get you one."

He let out a breath before pulling it out of the box. It was a silver dog tag. When I saw it in the mall, I thought it was something he would actually wear. I got it engraved. Katsuki Bakugou and underneath Dynamight.

He read it and looked at it for a while before turning to me, clutching it. "Thank you."

I smiled, "You like it?"

He scoffed, "Its perfect."

He pulled it over his head where the tag rested against his chest. I reached over, touched the tag and hummed. "It suits you like I thought it would." I let it go back down and when I looked up, his eyes had not left my face.

I swallowed nervously.

"Must be weird now you know where your soulmate is right?"

His mouth parted, still looking at me. "Yeah..."

I was the first one to break eye contact and then he cleared his throat. "I better go..."

He stood up, making his way to my door. I followed him and leant against the door as he hesitated outside.

He turned and wrapped his arms around my head. My chest, for what felt like the hundredth time that day, clenched. I wrapped my arms around his waist. I can't remember the last time I hugged Katsuki. He was hard with the muscles that were hiding under his hoodie but he smelt of caramel. My head rest on his chest.

We stayed like that for a minute before he let go. "Thank you, for everything." He said before quickly leaving.

After that day, I could not stop thinking about him.

No matter how many times I told myself it was futile and stupid, I couldn't help the crush that was fast forming. Katsuki did not help either. He would hold open the door for me, offer to partner up with me in training and help me when it came to my turn to cook dinner.

He has another soulmate for Christ's sake but that did not stop my heart. I knew it could never happen, my birthday was three months away and soon I would also know who my soulmate is but I felt myself fall deeper and deeper.

One night, all of our class were having a movie night and I sat beside Katsuki. My mouth was already dry being so close to him and he did not help by putting his arm around me. He said it was to be more comfortable so I accepted it. Halfway through the movie, I rested my head against his shoulder before realising what I was doing. I quickly lifted my head up and whispered a 'sorry'. Luckily the room was so dark or else the whole class would see how red my face.

"I like it." Katsuki whispered and I blushed even harder. It was a sentence I never thought would come out of his mouth and it made me feel all sorts of things I shouldn't.

Bravely, I rested my head back down and his arm come down and his fingers began to draw circle's on my bare arm almost unconsciously.

I went back to my room that night with my heart racing out of my chest and my thoughts racing even more.

Mine and Izuku's birthday was fast approaching. We decided to spent it with mom, with Katsuki and Uraraka coming round later in the evening for dinner.

Uraraka's birthday was before ours and she found out Izuku was her soulmate. She told him almost immediately and they've been together ever since. Everyone knew they would be but the confirmation is always nice.

I woke up at home on my sixteenth birthday and immediately looked down.

On my right hand pinky was a thin string wrapped around it. I followed it and it went out of the window, going further than I could see. I looked out longingly, wondering who was at the end.

I went to touch the string but it fell through my fingers, I knew I could not touch it but the feeling was weird.

Physically, I felt the same. I could almost forget about the string if it did not appear every time I lifted up my hand.

I kept staring at it, even at my birthday breakfast.

"Oh, leave it Y/N, you'll know who they are soon enough." Mum scolded.

The rest of the day was spent at the mall and visiting family until it was time for dinner.

Mr Aizawa was bringing Katsuki and Uaraka and the door rang at six o'clock exactly.

Mum got the door and I stood anxiously behind her. I didn't know why I was so anxious but it made me shift on my feet a lot.

"Hello sweethearts, come in! Come in!"

Izuku ran to greet Uraraka and I looked up at Katsuki, smiling until I noticed something on his hand.

I looked down and the world seemed to stop.

Around his pinky on his right hand was a piece of thin red string. But, only soulmates can see each others string, I thought until it stuck. Oh my god.

I followed the string with my eyes and it went all the way to wrap around my own pinky.

I looked in between the string for a while before looking up at Katsuki, my mouth open.

He looked at me with his eyebrows furrowed. "Y/N..."

I was suddenly full of anger. I did not say a word but turned around and stomped up to my room.

Why didn't he tell me? After all this time, he decided to hide it. Did he not want me as a soulmate?

Angry tears welled in my eyes, he clearly did not want me that's why he hid it for so long.

"Y/N, wait, please." I heard Katsuki follow me but I reached my room quick. I slammed the door, fully crying now.

He knocked on my door lightly. "Please, let me explain."

My hands shook as I rested my head against the door. "There's nothing to explain." I growled out.

I get why he wouldn't want me. I'm needy, I'm angry and I'm not the prettiest. Someone like Katsuki should have a model for his soulmate.

He knocked again, louder. "Please, Y/N. I don't want to ruin your birthday."

Too late, I thought.

I sighed, wiped my eyes (not that it would make any difference) and opened the door.

Katsuki stood slumped and look at me with caution. I stepped aside, and let him in.

I closed the door behind him and turned with my arms crossed my chest. "If you don't want me.." I took a big breath, "We'll just have to find a way to make it work."

The thought was horrible. My whole life I was told your soulmate was suppose to complete you, the other side of a coin and the thought of losing that fantasy terrified me.

"No, thats not what I want just," Katsuki sighed before rubbing a hand over his face and sitting on my bed. "I wanted to tell you, I did. It's just harder than I thought. I didn't know if you'd want me. I wasn't exactly nice to you for years and although we're friends now, a soulmate is completely different."

I was quiet and Katsuki continued.

"Y/N, I've," He sighed again, looking concerned. "I've always liked you, I was mean to you because I liked you too much and because you would stand up to me."

My voice seemed to have disappeared and I couldn't do anything but listen.

"Over the past year, I've liked you more and more and then on my birthday I was scared who my soulmate would be. I wanted it to be you and when I saw you, I saw the string and everything just made sense. You're so beautiful and so funny and so kind I just," He hung his head. "I don't deserve someone like you. That's why I didn't tell you."

I was quiet, taking in his words. It made sense but I couldn't help the nagging insecurity. It did not make sense to me how he could possibly like me and how he doesn't think he deserves me. Katsuki could have anyone he wanted, he got asked out all the time whenever we could go out but always denied them. I thought it was because he was too focused on hero work but maybe not...

I looked at him, his face was turned down as if he was too scared to look at me. I could see then, in the way he looked so small and vulnerable that he was telling the truth.

Katsuki never spoke about his feelings so if he has now, it must be genuine.

"Okay," He looked up, his eyes hopeful. "I believe you."

He smiled wider than I have ever seen.

I knew that this moment was when my life was going to change forever, but I didn't mind.

A/N = Hi! I know I haven't wrote anything in a very long time. I have just finished my first year of university so now I have more time to write! I am taking requests so feel free to send them in! <3

#katsuki bakugou #katsuki x reader #mha #fluff #soulmate au #katsuki bakugou x reader #katsuki bakugou x fem reader #female reader #bnha #my hero academia #mha self insert #my hero acedamia #boku no hero academia

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strayheartless · 9 months

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I’m thinking of liverpepper… and it’s making me sad.

So here, have a AU brain dump over cloud and his Geostigma:

I know we’ve seen Mako drawn as tablets, but I kind of imagine Clouds Mako days as being either injections like steroids or him having to go to the hospital for specific mako treatment, like chemotherapy.

Cloud was off school a lot. As a result he had to work twice as hard as everyone else just to keep up and graduate. His friends always brought him his homework, but there were some teachers (you know the ones) who made him feel guilty about how often he got laid up.

Like it got bad enough that now Cloud kind of has a complex about it as an adult, and Leon has to keep reminding him that he’s not weak for letting his body heal.

We know (from sora) that Mako used to affect his memory, make him pretty much a zombie. But I imagine that it’s worse straight after treatment. Like he’ll be in bed for two or three days but then for the next week -maybe two if it’s bad- Cloud kind of used to walk around in a haze. Squall, Zack, Tifa and Aerith used to tag team on who would guide him from lesson to lesson.

Squall used to act as a bit of a body guard with Zack. If anyone dared gossip about Cloud or try to make his day more difficult while he was vulnerable, they’d end up having the terrible twosome descend on then. Turns out there a lot of ways you can threaten someone without getting caught.

Cloud didn’t stop taking Mako until age 18. And he absolutely has been hospitalised by it.

He’s had Mako poisoning twice, and each time people truly thought he would die.

He was part of a clinical trial for materia to begin with, and it meant he had to forgo Mako treatments for 4 months (to get it out of his system) before they could start him on Materia.

Those four months were probably the most fraught and painful of his life. He spent most of it asleep and in agony, while Squall refused to leave him ‘just incase’. The entire friend group rallied to try and make it easier.

The first month on Materia was also not fun. Lot of knew side effects while his body got used to it. Some got easier, some he still has. He doesn’t suffer from tinnitus or depth perception issues anymore, but he still has periodic bouts of insomnia. He also deals with almost chronic heart burn.

Materia doesn’t effect his memory like the Mako, but it doesn’t help either. The Mako did a serious number on his brain tissue, and while doctors are sure his brain will recover, it seems to be a long arduous process.

Sometimes Cloud requires a mobility aid. Sometimes a cane, sometimes crutches, sometimes -if it’s bad- he needs a wheelchair to get round a supermarket or mall. It depends on the day, the spoons and the sores.

The first thing Cloud demanded be done when they adopted Sora and Roxas, was that they get them checked for the Geostigma Gene. He knows they are not - biologically speaking -able to get it from him, but Leon agrees just to settle Clouds anxieties about it.

Nowerdays his Geostigma is the most manageable it’s ever been, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy.

Lockdown was scary In their house. It’s no exaggeration to say Squall whipped down every surface, sanitised every piece of food packaging, made sure anybody with even a sniffle quarantined as soon as it happened. And Cloud -for all his griping that it was fine appreciated it.

after lockdown rules started easing Sora and Roxas started feeling super anxious about going out incase the brought something back. Because it wasn’t a joke to them.

Cloud himself dealt with a sudden surge of powerful anxiety even going out the front door.

Squall got him one of those sunflower lanyards, that lets people know you are immunocompromised, and it helps a little, but they all felt different about going outside.

These are just a few thinly thoughts.

#liverpepper #kingdom hearts #cloud strife #squall leonhart #strifehart #liverpepper au #thinking thoughts #Geostigma #chronic illness #cloud has Geostigma #liverpepper family #KH sora #KH roxas #ffvii #ffviii

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cobiehaven · 1 year

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Painting with Our Hearts — Lee Juyeon

SYNPOSIS; you despised your best friend for asking you to mentor her in the field of dating when you yourself hated the idea of being tied down to a man. but soon enough, she got the hang of it without the usage of your advice. so much so that her relationship escalated with a ring of engagement! in only 6 months? you know you should focus on your studies and get ready for graduation in dreams of starting your new life, fresh and problem free, but you face something much more scary than freedom. the side effects of this forbidden relationship you have fallen into with a man who you know you shouldn’t love..

PAIRING; artist!juyeon x fem!reader

GENRE; drama, fluff, angst

WORD COUNT; 4.7k

TAGS/WARNINGS; collage au, art major au, strangers to lovers, lowkey obsessive!juyeon, reader hates basically everyone, cheating (im sorry ily juju), strong language, tension, mentions of starving for weight loss, a bit suggestive, mentions of engagement, mention of starting a family, legal drinking, lying and betrayal, arguing, broken friendship, lowkey didn’t know where i was going with the ending, procrastinated wayyy too long on this so probably ass 😀.

AUTHORS NOTE; i felt awkward writing this because never in a million years would i imagine juyeon cheating but then again it was for the sake of the fic so enjoy.

FLASHBACK

“don’t you think you’re going a little too overboard? at this rate, you’re going to gain some kind of disorder,” you sat with your chin resting in the palm of your hand as you watched your best friend, feng, continue to whine and complain about her body.

you swore you had never seen her whip her head around so fast. “what?! overboard? psh, as if,” she waved off but was awkwardly cut off when a loud rumble erupted from her stomach. you raised a brow, her expression lowering to a pout.

“okay, and what about it?” she stuck her chin out at you.

“you’re going to get sick.”

“so? it’s worth it.”

your eyes trailed from head to toe and pressed your lips together with tension. how could she possibly care more about her image over her health?

“what are you even doing this for? doesn’t your rich family already force you to keep a healthy diet?” you asked, lifting your head out of your hand and instead, leaning back in the comfort of your chair. “which makes it even easier to loose all of this fat!” it was silent for a moment as your friend took her sweet time to check herself out in the long body mirror she had behind her overly decorated door. “anyways,” you waited for her go on with her sentence. “you know that boy that sits in the back of your arts class?”

“oh my god.”

“no, listen!”

“i’m leaving.”

“please!” she pouted.

you still sent her the most uninterested look known to man. but with one hard eye roll and loud groan, you sunk down into your chair. “go on.”

“good!” her emotion changing within seconds. “i heard he likes girls on the smaller side. the ones with small waists and tiny faces! minjoo told me so last week! i’m setting goals for myself,” she shot her brightest smile and swayed around her room as she went on and on about the likes and dislikes she had heard from others about this boy. this boy that had been the talk of the school since he moved into the fine arts department. the exact one that had many other girls soothing over him when he didn’t even do as much as even look their direction. sure, he was good-looking but was that really all anyone needed to fall head over heels for someone?

“minjoo? as in the minjoo that supposedly dated and dumped juyeon after 2 days because he was too ‘quiet’?” you raised your brow again, this time tilting your head down in a ‘you’ve got to be joking’ kind of way. “yes! her!” feng smiles. “as if two days is enough time to learn all about someone’s likes, dislikes, turn-ons, turn-offs!” you sighed. “have you even talked to him before?”

feng shook her head which only had you rolling your eyes for probably the 5th time this morning.

“i was planning on asking you to help me approach him..?” she tangled her fingers together in front of herself, shrugging up her shoulders in a pleading manner. “i know it’s a stretch to think i have a chance with him but please!” she begged. “why me?” she knew how much you hated things like this. much less men. you’d never be able to understand them. “because you love me~!” she shot you the biggest smile as she took your hands into hers. you gave her a playful and shocked expression, “ain’t no way you just pulled that card on me.”

her glued on poker face seemed to prove you wrong.

pushing her away, you stood up and crossed your arms in front of her and with one deep sigh, “what do i get out of this?” you asked.

payment was expected for hard and excruciating work.

“i’ll do all of your house work including running hall errands for you during the school day for a month!”

“two months.”

“a month and one week?”

“listen, i’m getting involved with a man for you.”

“okay okay!! a month and a half.”

“cool, now go get me a soda.”

“what?! but i said during the school day!” she complained while you wandered over to the bed. falling down into it with a satisfied grunt. “and technically we have class in 30 minutes, so you better get the drink quick so we can walk there in less than a hurry,” you replied which had her shuffling her way to the door.

PRESENT TIME

you didn’t really know why you agreed to this. why you didn’t just gather up everything in you to just tell her no and get on with your life. it would have been easier for you. without feng around, it was awkward to see juyeon’s face around. neither of you went out of your way to say hi to each other but you could feel his eyes staring into the back of your head during classes.

without feng, you would have no business with juyeon at all.

so why was he the one to invite you to your departments celebration party for winning 1st in competition during winter break? saying that he needed to discuss something with you in private?

especially when he was already dating your best friend?

what exactly was he in need of telling you so badly?

sucking up a large sigh, you swung open the door to the korean bbq place everyone had agreed to meet at. you were a little surprised by the amount of people this place agreed to let in but it seemed to be the class presidents last resort since many in the class were still too young to go clubbing. luckily, not everyone showed up.

“y/n!” a familiar voice called, gesturing you over to the table.

you sat at the end, not wanting to be squished in between anybody who reeked of alcohol and grease. you insisted on getting a table for yourself but the staff wouldn’t let you as they were already finding a hard time serving your department as it was. maybe it would have been easier to just not come. while juyeon was the one to invite you, he didn’t seem to be anywhere around the tables that were already set.

“hey, where’s juyeon?” you asked the girl sitting next to you. “i think he said he was running a bit late.”

speaking of juyeon, your head whipped around when you heard your department cheering for his arrival. he looked winded and messy coming in through the door but he shot a happy smile when everyone was glad to see him. you rolled your eyes at how obnoxious everyone was being.

unfortunately, you had to give up your edge seat and slide further down the booth for him to sit down. it was the only space that was left.

yeah, you really shouldn’t have come.

claustrophobia was overcoming you as you could feel juyeons cold pressing against your side. “i’m glad you could come,” he turned towards you. “i’m glad you could come late,” even without looking his way, you could feel his expression falling into a frown.

it was silent amongst you two. you really didn’t have much to talk about with him considering you only knew each other through feng. only chiming in when the guys across from you both had interesting things to comment on. the reek of alcohol became stronger as you started to get more and more out of it with each sip.

it went on like that for a while before your attention was caught by the girl next to you suddenly banging her hands on the table. “soojin?” you called out her name over the booming music. “are you okay?” you asked half-slurred. before you knew it, she had turned towards you and spilled whatever she had eaten that night all into your lap. the guys around the table all backing away with disgust and shock. but you were paying no attention to them and only at the pool of vomit seeping through the thickness of your clothes. your eyes trailed up to the girls in front of you before she slurred some “im sorry”’s before slumping back against the booth.

“oh my god, i think im going to throw up,” one of the guys across from you slapped his hand over his mouth. to which the other guy had yelled out an abundant of curses for him not too.

you were still in shock. you could feel the warm liquid seeping far enough to touch your bare skin, that alone making you want to wake the girl up and sock her right in the nose for putting you in such a disgusting situation. if it wasn’t for your hazy mind, you probably would have. suddenly, you felt a pair of hands on your legs making you nearly jump out of your seat, but you just tensed when you realized it was juyeons, scraping the chunks off of your pants with a thick handful of napkins. it wasn’t long before he grabbed your hand and dragged you to the mens bathroom, not even having the mind to argue with his actions.

“im sorry, y/n.”

was he apologizing for touching you? or forcing you into the bathroom with him? or maybe inviting you to this overly crowded korean bbq?

“i have spare clothes in my car. do you think you’re okay enough to wait here while i go get them?” he asked, looking into your hooded eyes. “im not fucking five. i don’t need your help,” you shrugged his protective arm off of you and headed for the door. “wait!” juyeon grabbed your wrist, making you whip your head around. “you have shit all over you. please, let me help you.”

technically he did get you into this situation. even if he didn’t know something like this was going to happen.

“fine. just hurry,” you huffed. “its already embarrassing enough just standing here in front of you like this..” you mumbled as your arms coiled around your body.

just as so, juyeon didn’t take long. he came back to hand you a change of clothes, even adding a pair of socks to the pile. patiently waiting outside the family stall as you took your sweet time changing, you grumbled with each peel of damp clothing off of your body.

“juyeon?” you called.

“yeah?”

“can you hand me a wet paper towel?”

within seconds, you shuffled over to take the wet cloth out of juyeon’s hands from under the stall door. “thanks.” it took you a while to wipe yourself down, trying not to stumble over every time your mind started to give in to the heavy alcoholic haze overcoming you but soon enough, you flushed the paper down the toilet and shrugged on the loose fitting clothes into your body.

“please, let me take your clothes home and wash them for you,” he insisted the moment you unlocked the stall door. his eyes locking on his oversized clothes quite literally engulfing your figure. it took you a moment to register his staring, much less his words. but once you did, you just scoffed and crossed your arms over yourself. “stop staring you perv,” you fixed a hardened gaze on him. “forget it, just, thank you for the clothes.”

“wait!” he stopped you after you had pushed past him.

“ugh, what now?”

“how are you getting home?”

“why do you care?” you asked with a raise of your brow. “because if you plan on driving home, you’re way too drunk to be driving,” he exclaimed. “its fine, ill just take a taxi or something,” you said before rushing out of the bathroom, this time not giving him the time to stop you. “oh? y/n? why did you just come out of the boys- hey!” you pushed past your classmate rudely just to get out of there. you could care less about the many voices calling for you, not wanting you to leave so soon. you were done with ‘parties’.

you just wanted the embarrassment to stop.

the next few days seemed to go by normally. along with the next month or two. nothing out of the ordinary seemed to happen and primarily just went back to your daily school work and boring life. feng and juyeon were together per usual and you stayed silent for a lot of their interactions. the only times you seemed to see juyeon without feng around was whenever he happened to pass by you in the halls or in class but other than that, it became a common occurrence that juyeon joined in on you and feng’s time together. it annoyed you a lot, especially when feng never gave you the option to leave when she wasn’t even paying attention to you in the first place.

actually, the annoying part wasn’t the two of them together, necessarily, it was more so juyeon that wanted to get your attention outside of that time that started to get you annoyed of the times when he was with you and feng. for example, the multiple times he begged you during class to lend your notes to him, or the times he asked you to do the bare minimum like open his milk carton for him during lunch, or even the time he made you walk 5 blocks down the street during a heatwave just to return his clothes to him while he was working.

as much as you hated him for wasting your time, the more you started to have less of a reason to want to hate him with the efforts he made in occupying your time.

but of course, at the end of the day, he still belonged to your best friend.

you found it easier to block them out with the help of your headphones and laptop. your music and videos was much more worth it than some guy and his obsessive girlfriend.

oh, you mean, your best friend.

you sat quietly as you were trying your best to block out the distracting noise coming from the two of them, focusing more on your homework that was giving you more of a headache than their love language. you brushed it off for as long as you could before you sighed and stood up, the scrapping of your seat against the floor made feng crank her neck towards you.

“where are you going?” she asked. “home, i can’t focus here and my head is killing me,” you replied, packing up your stuff as the enormous pile of books weighed you down everyday.

you failed to notice juyeon’s visible concern.

“oh okay,” she shrugged.

“feel better.”

you and juyeon shared eye contact with each other for a few seconds before heading off. you didn’t know why but something about that sounded like it had much more of a deeper meaning than just a get well wish.

when you got home, you were relieved with how still your house was. it started to subside your headache. but your relaxation was cut short when you felt a buzz in your pocket.

juyeon:

that’s quite the amount of stress you have packing on

you:

what?

juyeon:

the books

you’ve been working non-stop on papers for the past three days, you really deserve a break

you:

i’ll be fine, it’s nothing to worry about

you stared at the messages for a few seconds before realizing he probably wasn’t going to say anything else. putting your phone to your side, you sat up on your bed with a deep sigh. “i’ll probably just take some pain killers and work some more..” you mumbled to yourself, rubbing your palms over your tired eyes.

another buzz caught your attention.

juyeon:

meet me in 10 in the loft.

the period scared you.

15 MINUTES LATER

you arrived in the loft as told, figuring that there would be no reason to ignore it when you knew he’d probably just come to your house if you didn’t answer.

he was really confusing sometimes.

“juyeon?” you called.

the lights were still off. had you gotten there too early? surely not, a walk from your house to the studio was 15 minutes, not 10.

“juyeon, this isn’t funny. let’s just make this quick.” you called again, this time stating your conditions. you were about to get fed up with waiting before you suddenly felt something cold splash onto your back, making you yelp and jump forward, whipping your head around in the plain darkness. you could see a dark silhouette and quickly made it out to be juyeon’s slender figure. “what the fuck?!” you cursed before the lights were flashed on. your eyes having to take a moment to adjust to the sudden change.

he was laughing. crying, even. looking at yourself, you realized he had thrown white paint on you seeing as he still had the bucket in his hands.

you were not going to let him get away with this.

“you little shit,” you cursed again before taking all of your anger and grabbing the first bucket you saw and prying open the top, chasing juyeon around the room and successfully whisking the liquid onto him. you both when back and forth, the challenge becoming so much that you soon started to forget about your troubles, about your work, about feng and even the ones deep down that you didn’t want to admit.

this was the most fun you’ve had in a long, long, time.

“please! have mercy!” juyeon cried with added laughter as you continued to pour, purple, paint onto him. “you’ve brought this upon yourself,” you laughed before he tried pushing you away from him, somehow fully knocking you over in the process and bringing himself down along with you.

he shielded your fall with his hands behind your back and head but once he came to realization as to what position you were in, his eyes widened and his whole body tensed up. yours did the same.

it was silent. the short few moments of you both having fun was turned into long and breathtaking moments. not to mention how close he was to you, what it felt like to have his fingers tangled in your hair, what it felt like to hear both of your hearts beating the same cadence in this silent room. you watched as his eyes trailed from yours, down to your lips, and then back up. the look he was giving you was almost inviting but also scared.

you really didn’t know how to describe this feeling.

in a panic, you broke the moment to trail your hands up the tiny space between you both to quickly smear what paint you had left on your hands. the colors mixing into his caramel tone and making him not any less beautiful than he already was.

maybe you were starting to see what girls saw in this man.

“hey..!” he whined, smacking your hands off of him. he squinted his eyes at you challengingly, but just gave you a sly smirk instead.

it was hard to believe this was the same timid guy from a few days ago.

helping you to your feet, he ran his fingers through his dry but, at the same time, wet, hair. “how do you feel?” he asked.

“definitely better, no more headache.”

“that’s good. that was the goal,” he smiled and fixed himself up. just as you were about to straighten your clothes, you paused and looked up at him. “wait, you brought me here just for that?” you asked.

“don’t get mad. i was just trying to-“

“i’m not mad. it’s just.. i thought you wanted to talk.”

“about what?”

you rolled your eyes at his stupidity.

“about whatever it was you wanted to tell me a couple months back? you never ended up telling me.”

it took him a second to try and think back on it, but eventually he did.

“yeah because you left before i could!” he protested. you giving him yet another eye roll. “well i’m here now so what was it?”

he hesitated. you could tell by the way he was looking around at anything but you that the same timidness from before was back.

“juyeon?” you called out to him, awaiting his answer.

“feng proposed to me.”

the silence was long. extremely long. nothing could express the amount of shock and unknown pain that you were overcome with. you swore you felt your heart sink down into the pit of your stomach.

“what..?” you refused to believe it.

“she proposed to me. a week ago. after 5 months of dating and she’s waiting for my answer on our 6th month anniversary.”

“which is when?”

“…today.”

you wanted nothing more than for the world to open up from underneath you and swallow you whole. what was feng thinking? what were you thinking? how could you get flustered over some boy who you barely know? especially one who was about to get engaged to your best friend. one that you helped your best friend get together with!

“well, what are you going to say?” you asked, you could feel your blood starting to boil with anger. but not knowing where exactly it was coming from. but you tried your best to sound calm and collected as your biggest fear was probably him finding out that you were lowkey crushing on him, this way.

“i don’t know yet,” juyeon murmured. “i was going to ask you.”

“why do you need to ask me for advice on your own personal problems?”

“because.”

“because?”

“because!”

“i’m not following.”

you could tell he was starting to get riled up. “because i’m not sure if i actually like her!” he screamed. to your own shock, you could tell he was holding in those exact words for a long while.

“so.. you played her?” you weren’t sure wether to feel relieved or pissed off about that. “or i guess.. playing her?” you switched to present tense.

“i don’t know..” he ran his hands down his face in frustration. “i just.. im not sure if i’m ready for marriage? but knowing her, if i reject her, she’ll think i don’t love her anymore and i don’t want to have that sort of confusion within our relationship all of the time. she already thinks i talk to you too much,” he sighed.

feng thinks he talks to you too much? since when has she ever been around to see the both of you have a consistent conversation other than about school work?

whatever, you didn’t want to worry about that right now. you had a boy stressed out of his mind right in front of you. “juyeon, it sounds more to me that you’re just in a toxic relationship.”

it was silent for a moment as all he did was just stare at the ground but as much as he didn’t want to agree with you, he knew you were right. “what should i do?” he asked. but he already knew what your answer was going to be… and you didn’t want to give him that kind of heartbreak. “do what you feel is right,” you said softly. you hesitated but after a while, you snaked your arm around his back and rubbed light circles onto his shoulder blades. he lowered himself to your height and buried his face into your shoulder, his arms wrapping around you into a deep hug. he didn’t cry, but you could tell he was confused and hurt. this had been bothering him for quite some time.

cutting the relaxing hug short, you were met with his eyes as your own filtered with confusion. “are you feeling better now?” you asked. “no,” he replied. as you were about to open your mouth to respond, he quickly furthered your confusion as he captured your lips into a soft kiss. your eyes growing wide in utter shock as you didn’t know what to do with your hands. much less your anything else. this was the first time you had ever kissed someone. or.. be kissed by someone. nonetheless, with your little knowledge from the various kdramas you had watched in your time, you closed your eyes and tried to act like you knew what you were doing. luckily, juyeon sensed your embarrassment and swiftly led your arms around his neck as he did all of the work for you. leading the kiss into soft multiple ones that had you getting the flow down instantly. after about a minute or so, you broke away, or maybe he did. you couldn’t tell with how hazed your mind was right now.

“are you.. feeling better now?” you asked for the second time.

you didn’t get an answer.

“did you have a talk with feng?” you asked juyeon as the two of you walked into class together, having conveniently run into each other in the hallway. “i don’t want to talk about it,” he sighed out, though it sounded more of like a groan. luckily for you, you sat right in front of juyeon so you didn’t have to cut the conversation short.

“you should just be honest with her, it’s the better option.”

he agreed yet he still looked so troubled.

“don’t tell me you were planning to do it through text-“

“do you really think that lowly of me?”

well… considering he got himself into this whole mess…

“please don’t just bare through it when you know it won’t work out. that’s possibly the worst thing you could do,” you sighed, reaching your hand out to place on top of his in a comforting way. but he snatched his hand away with such force that it had you even more confused than before.

did he not want to be around you? if so, then why did he kiss you?

“am i just that bad at kissing?” you said half-heartedly but you were immediately shut down by juyeon who hushed you. “don’t say it so loud!” he whisper-yelled at you. you understood that he didn’t want anyone to know that he technically cheated on his girlfriend—which you still weren’t sure if you were happy or upset about—but he didn’t have to reject your comfort when you tried to give it to him for his sake. “then what is it?” he rubbed at his temples, “y/n, i think she already knows.”

juyeon sighed and stared down at his fingers that sat in his lap. when he felt like he could muster up the courage to tell you more, he glanced around one time just to make sure no one was within close enough range. “today, before school, she told me that as soon as we got married with our parents approval.. she wanted to move abroad and start a family. she kept going on about how much of a future she wanted with me and i wasn’t sure how to respond to it all. i got so stressed out that i ended up snapping at her and walking away.” he shifted awkwardly in his seat as if he was waiting for the moment his girlfriend would walk in through that door despite not sharing a single class together. “she didn’t chance after me like she usually does when we have arguments,” he said.

for as long as you knew feng, she had always been an overbearing person. she was a very ‘up in your face’ kind of girl and that’s what made people either really like her or really hate her.

hearing about how she bombarded juyeon with such a wide topic, you could only imagine how he must of felt.

luckily, she knew her place when it came to conversations with you. it was a blessing.

“that’s good, though!” you exclaimed. “it would make it easier for you to break it off.”

“i just cant stop thinking about what she’d say if she found out i kissed her best friend on the day of our 6 months,” he sighed and cupped his hands over his face, leaning forward onto the desk.

your attention was caught when you felt a buzz in your back pocket. pulling out your phone, you were greet by a message from your best friend. except.. maybe said best friend, didn’t want to be best friends anymore.

“oh no..” you trailed off.

“what?” juyeon asked, peeking at you from between his fingers.

you hesitated for a long minute but eventually flipped your phone around enough for him to view the screen.

feng:

[sent attached photo]

once a cheater, always a cheater.

fuck you both.

proof read by @hwasluvr

84 notes · View notes

xojennyboo · 6 months

Text

A/N: double update today! This one contained loads of smut. Thank you for reading and liking my stuff. This will be the last part of this mini story. Let me know what you think. There’s also a small message at the end of the chapter for anyone who needs to hear it. Love you guys. Thanks once again. Happy reading!

Y/N POV

As the months passed, dealing with what happened got easier. I continued on going to therapy, having some sessions by myself and some with Harry. When I had brought up Harry joining in on some sessions to my therapist, she instantly thought it would be a great idea considering how comfortable I felt with Harry. Harry also had private sessions by himself to talk about his feelings with everything. As the days passed by, Harry and I got closer and closer. It was weird adjusting to not spending time with one another prior, to now spending every minute together.

After doing months of therapy, I learned to stop blaming myself for what happened. I also learned so many things about myself that slowly started to make sense as the days went by. Having control of my life was important to me. I wanted to be able to be happy for myself and to be able to not break out if things didn’t go my way, things that I have overcome by therapy. As for my fears about pregnancy, I learned that it’s all about taking chances and going with the flow. Yes, it might be scary obtaining the answers to tough questions, but these are obstacles that we must surpass. After facing my fears to obtaining the answers to my fertility questions, I decided on booking appointments to my gynecologist. I went with the same doctor who oversaw my pregnancy since I felt super comfortable with her. I had expressed my worries and she helped me get all of the fertility exams done. Harry came to some of the appointments when he wasn't busy with the last-minute arrangements for his album release. He was officially finished with it and was super excited to release it to his fans. Once the doctor provided me with the results on my fertility, I was relieved to know that I had no issues. She explained that sometimes, miscarriages can be common, especially when it's your first pregnancy. Harry came to this appointment with me, and he was very happy to know that I was okay too. Harry also decided to do a fertility test on himself with me, and his testing came back clean as well. Having him take a fertility test with me meant the world to me.

Harry moved back into our house a couple of months ago, selling his apartment. Things felt right with him here. He became super attentive with me, making sure I was okay emotionally, physically, and mentally. We cooked almost every night together and created new memories that I Cherish every day. Our relationship has been kept private from the media, only our closest family and friends knowing about it. Thomas was very happy when he found out about it. Thomas has been supportive about everything. We’ve definitely had gotten closer after everything that had happened. He occasionally came to our house for dinners or just to hang out and write music with Harry. He recently started a new relationship with one of the women who works with us. I couldn't be happier for him.

Since Harry and I decided to rekindle our romance, we haven't had any intimacy. This being that I wasn't ready emotionally. I was too scared to take that step. I had talked about it with my therapist, and she mentioned that it was okay to feel that way but that I would have to take those necessary steps to overcome. As the time passed by, the need to feel Harry intimately was consuming my thoughts almost every day. The desire to feel his naked skin against mine grew and grew each day. I knew that he felt the same way by the way he would look at me with desire. Today, I planned on taking the first step. He had a long day of meetings which gave me plenty of time to plan what I wanted to do. I was going to cook a romantic dinner for us, decorate the dining room and our bedroom with candles. Our bedroom will have rose petals are around the floor and on the bed making this very intimate and romantic.

As soon as Harry left for the day, I went to the grocery store to purchase the ingredients for tonight's dinner. I decided on cooking chicken for dinner with a creamy sauce to accompany it. I also decided on making mashed potatoes, roasted asparagus, and a bit of rice. Then I went to a flower shop to purchase enough roses for tonight. Lastly, I went to Target to purchase enough candles,the light up ones, not the real ones. Once I got home, I decided on decorating first since I knew it would be more tedious. Once finished, I started cooking dinner. Once that was done, I went back upstairs to shower, shave, get dressed and do my makeup. I decided on wearing a simple champagne colored dress that hugged my curves in the right places. Underneath, I wear a sexy lingerie set I had purchased a few days ago. it was also champagne colored, having the matching bra, thong, stockings, and garter belt to put together the whole outfit. I was definitely nervous. I went downstairs after I finished getting ready and heated up the food. It was already 6 pm. Harry usually comes home around 6:30pm, which is perfect since it gives me time to set the table. At precisely 6:15pm, I get a message from Harry saying that he's on his way home. I quickly get the champagne out of the fridge and place it on the ice bucket. I look at the time again after a couple of minutes I hear Harry pulling up in the driveway. "Get it together y/n ", I tell myself. "You're ready", I tell myself again, giving myself as much affirmation before he walks through that door. I go to the dining room to wait for him there, shaking away the last-minute nerves that have appeared in the last hour. I take a couple of deep breaths before I hear the front door open.

"y/n I'm home! It smells so good in here", I hear him say, lightly giggling at his comment. I take one last deep breath before building up the courage to answer. " Babe where are you?", I hear Harry say. "In the dining room!", I yell back so he hears me. I hear his footsteps coming closer and closer until he's fully in here. He looks shocked at first, and then a wide smile spreads across his face. "What's all of this for?", he says walking up to me placing a small peck on my lips. "I have decided to cook us a romantic dinner", I say to him. "It looks delicious ", he says admiring the table before him. "What's for dessert?", he teasingly asks, knowing that baking wasn't my expertise. With all of the confidence I had left I answered. "Me", his head snapping back towards me in shock and desire. A Mischievous smile takes me in a trance, my need for him growing intently. "Hmm. Is that so honey?", he says with a raspy voice. His arms snakes around my waist pulling me closer to him, his eyes darker than before filled with lust. "Y-yes", I stutter at the close proximity, his face getting closer to me, his eyes staring at my reaction, eyes, and lips. "Well, in that case, I think we should skip right into dessert don't you think?", he says, his lips extremely close to mine, barely touching. "Dinner will get cold", I whispered against his lips, my chest rising and falling at a quick pace. "Hmm, you're right. Let's eat then that way I can eat you afterwards ", he says, placing a kiss on my lips finally. The kiss intensifies as he pulls me closer to him, his tongue entering my mouth. My fingers go directly to his hair, tangling in his curls. He pulls away, our breathing heavy, as he walks towards my chair to pull it out for me. Still stunned, I gather myself and sit down. I feel Harry getting closer to my ear, his breathing heavy. "By the way, you look absolutely beautiful tonight", he whispers against my ear as he places a kiss on my neck before he sits down across the table from me.

How am I going to get through this dinner. That whole interaction, as simple as it was, made me wet. Harry had a thing of making everything he said super sexy, especially towards me. Or maybe it was just in my head. We eat in complete silence at first, savoring the meal I made. I poured us a glass of champagne needing it a bit more for confidence. I watched as Harry ate his dinner his jaw clenching with every bite he took. " Mmmm, so good", he moaned in satisfaction. I felt those moans directly on my clothed clit. Every bite he took of his food he would make some sort of moan or groan, making it harder to contain myself. The suppressed want and frustration for him slowly making its way out. He knew what he was doing, loving the reaction he was getting from me as I squirmed in my seat at how wet I was getting. Once we were done eating, I got up to clear the table. "Stay here", I instructed before going into the kitchen and placing everything on the island. I quickly took my dress off and let my hair down, exposing the lingerie. I felt so sexy in this it boosted my confidence more. I took a deep breath, seems I have to do that a lot nowadays, before walking back into the dining room. Harry quickly looked in my direction and gulped down the bit of champagne he had left. "On my...", he said, as he squirmed around in his seat. "Do you like it?", I ask as I walked towards him. He didn't utter a word, too stunned to speak.

"I'll take it as a, yes?", I say. He gets up abruptly, attaching his lips to mine, the force causing me to take a step back. His tongue entered my mouth swirling around with mine, tasting the champagne on his lips. "You look like such a goddess", he says. He gives me a couple more kisses before pulling away and sitting back down. "Now do me a favor baby and come sit in front of me so I can eat my dessert", he says with confidence. Jesus. I walk towards the table, getting on top of the table to position myself in front of him. Once I’m lying on the table, he gets up to admire me. He takes one of the straps that's attached to my stocking around his finger and pulls it back before letting it go causing it to snap against my skin. I moaned a little at the sensation that it gave me. “My goodness where do I start with you?", he says, unclamping the clips. He slowly reaches to the hem of the thong that I have on and removes it, bringing it up to his face and smelling it, before placing it in his packet. "You smell divine", he says as he places my foot on either side of the table, my legs spreading in front of him. He sits back down on the chair, scooting closer to my exposed pussy. "So wet for me y/n", he says before kissing my clit. My hips buck up at the satisfaction of his lips making contact to where I need him the most. "So ready for me", he says, spreading my folds with his fingers before sucking on my clit, a moan coming out of me. His hot wet tongue swirled around my aching clit over and over, my moans echoing throughout the dining room. My hands gripping at the sides of the table as the noise of Harry's tongue on me consumed me. His tongue licked me all over, not missing any spots.

He inserted his tongue in my aching hole, slowly licking all of my arousal onto his tongue. My legs spread for him, giving him more access. "Oooh fuck Harry, don't stop baby, don’t stop", I moaned as he sucked and flicked my clit. My back arching on the table as I felt my orgasm coming. "That's it baby, let the neighbors know who is making you feel this good", he says as he inserts two fingers inside me making me gasp and choke up. He instantly starts thrusting his fingers in and out of me as his tongue works on my clit. My aching hole clenched around his fingers as I was about to come. Before I did, he withdrew completely from me causing me to whine. "Gosh look at you so desperate", he says. He gets up, attaching his lips to mine, tasting myself on his tongue, causing me to moan against his lips. "You taste so good baby ", he groans against my lips, his clothed crotch pressing against my cunt. "Take me upstairs", I say breathlessly. I wrap my arms around his neck as he carries me bridal style up the stairs. He slows down and notices the rose petals on the hallway leading up to our room. "Oh y/n what do you have up your sleeve ", he smirks. I open the door with my hand since he's carrying me, and we walk into the dark pre-lit room that is filled with rose petals. "Surprise!", I childishly say to him smiling widely at my work. He looks around in awe giving me a long passionate kiss as he places me on the bed. "Do you like it?", I ask. "Like it? I love this", he says, climbing on the bed with me. "Are you sure you want to do this?", he asks. "Yes Harry", I say grabbing his face and pulling him in a kiss. He reaches behind my back and unclamps my bra, exposing my breasts. The takes one in each hand, gently palming them and pinching my nipples occasionally. My head falls back in pleasure, my body sensitive at the lack of pleasure that it hasn't received in months. My neck exposed, Harry places kisses on my neck, biting and sucking the spot below my ear causing me to moan."Harry please", I gasp, pleading for more. He groans as he kisses down my neck and onto my chest, taking one of my nipples into his mouth while massaging my other breast, my fingers playing with his hair. He switches, now sucking on my other nipple, giving it the same attention.

I kneel up, pushing him against the matters. "Now it's your turn baby", I say as I unbutton his trousers. I took them off, taking his briefs with them. I took his shirt off exposing his tattooed body to me. I could never get tired of looking at his naked body. I straddle his legs, placing delicate kisses on his chest and down his torso. His stomach flexing at the contact of my lips against his skin. "I've". Kiss. "Missed", kiss, "you", kiss, "so", kiss "much", kiss. His eyes closed, feeling every kiss I gave his body. I kissed down his torso and down to his pulsating cock. I placed delicate kisses up his shaft before placing the tip in my mouth, Harry hissing at the sensation. I moaned as I felt his precum on my tongue, the sensation causing Harry to buck his hips upwards inserting himself more into my mouth. "Fuck", he moans as I start bobbing my head, gently squeezing his balls as I sucked him off. I took more and more of him in until I was able to put all of him in my mouth. His tip hitting the back of my throat causing me to gag in pleasure. " fuuck ", Harry moaned as he felt my mouth close around his cock. I was so horny, our actions making me wet. I pulled away a bit looking at him, how sexy he looked right now. "Fuck my mouth Harry", I say as I fully take him into my mouth causing him to groan in pleasure. He reaches down to gather my hair together as he starts to thrust himself into my mouth. "That's right baby, take my cock ", he pants as he continues to hit the back of my throat causing me to gag around his dick. I close my eyes, tears spilling from them as they go down my face. "Fuck baby", he moans the sound of our moans filling the room. Before I can pull back, I feel his cum shoot down my throat. I pull away, a string of my saliva attached to his cock making this super-hot.

I take my finger and wipe my lips, tasting him on my fingers as I sucked his juices off "mmm", I moan. "Delicious", I say as I straddle his hips. His hands were instantly on my waist ready to guide me. I was in a euphoric daze, wanting Harry to fuck my brains out. I grab Harry's dick and I slowly rubbed my wet pussy against it, feeling every pulsating vein on me. My wetness glistening on his cock. "Look at how wet I am for you baby", I moan as we both look down. "Fuck Y/N, please baby", he says as he digs his fingertips on my sides. I grind on him a couple more times before I lift myself up and insert the tip in me, causing both of us to moan. My head falls back in pleasure his tip already stretching me. "You're so big Harry", I say as I slide down on him completely, his cock stretching me out in all the right ways. "Move baby, gosh you feel so good", he pants out, his hips bucking up in desperation. I move my hips up and down, my hands on his chest as we finally connect. With every movement I make, the more I feel my orgasm coming. I'm a moaning mess, my body overly sensitive. "That's right baby, ride my cock", he moans. "Look at your arousal dripping down", he moans as he starts to thrust up, in need of a release from the both of us. We look down and I can see his cock disappearing inside me, covered by my wetness with each thrust. My hands go down to my throbbing clit, rubbing myself as I try to reach my high, but Harry swats my hand away and replaces it with his instead, rubbing me at a steady pace. “Oh fuck, baby that feels...uh", I moan out, my release spraying on Harry's torso. Our actions stopped, looking at the mess I just made. “Fuck that was hot to watch", Harry says. "Want to see if you're able to do that again for me baby?", he says as our movements resumed. I start riding him faster and harder, each thrust hitting that familiar spot from earlier, causing me to moan loudly as Harry rubbed my clit faster. The feeling was so intense sending me into a bliss. "Fuck. Fuck. Fuck", I moan out I squirt on Harry's torso again, my arousal dripping down his sides and onto the mattress. "That's a good girl", Harry says as he stops my movements and switches positions. One thing you enjoyed about your sex life with Harry was that he wasn't afraid to explore different things sexually.

Harry pushes me against the mattress, taking my legs in his hands and placing them in a "V" position. My head is hanging from the bed as he positions himself in front of my entrance. Slowly, he thrusts into me, both of us moaning in pleasure. "Look at you already fucked out of your mind", he says, his words causing me to be wet again. "Do you like me stuffing you with my cock y /n?", he asks as he begins to thrust into me. "On fuck, yes Harry", I say as I squeeze my breasts in pleasure. "Tell me how much you love it", he tells me as he thrusts harshly into me. "Il love it baby", I say as he thrusts into me harder and faster, this position hilling my g-spot repeatedly. "I love how your cock stretches my tight wet pussy. I love how hard you fuck me. I love how you make me yours, baby", I gasp for air as his thrusts are literally knocking the air out of me. I let my head hang, the rush of my blood going down causing me to feel the pleasure with much more intensity. "Fuck baby I'm gonna cum", Harry pants as the grip on my legs tighten. I feel very lightheaded in this position but I'm enjoying Harry ramming into me. My moans become louder as Harry rubs my clit again. A few more thrusts and we’re both screaming and moaning our release. I lift my head up, afraid of passing out from the intensity of my orgasm. Harry drags me closer to him, so my head is no longer hanging. He leans closer to me, his sweaty body against mine, our breathing heavily from our highs. "That was", "Amazing", I finish saying.

We both started laughing at what just happened. Harry removes himself from me laying down next to me and engulfing me in a hug. Still in a daze, too tired to do anything. "That was a very good dessert", he says causing both of us to burst out laughing. "You're too much", I playfully hit his chest. "I love you", he tells me, a bit more serious. I look up at him, a few strands of curls sticking to his sweaty forehead. I take my hand and push his hair back, removing it from his forehead as I lean up and kiss his lips softly. "I love you more", I whisper against his lips as we start kissing passionately. He sits up on the bed before straddling me on his lap, my chest against his. He holds me tightly against him, his lips molding against mine, our tongues fighting for dominance, he wins. Smirking against my lips, he moves his arms around my waist and slowly sinks into me again, my head resting against his shoulder. We slowly start to move against each other, kissing our lips with passion. We both moan against one another, his fingers tracing down my back, the sensation causing goosebumps against my skin. The familiar feeling in my stomach appears. My arms are around Harry's neck, my hands gripping at his hair at the intensity that he's making me feel. "Marry me ", he says abruptly, his movements not stopping whatsoever. I look into his eyes and see the sincerity in them. Our movements pick up, our breathing picking up as we’re about to cum together. "Marry me y/n", he says again. He puts his arms around me tightly as he thrust upwardly, my head falling back. "Yes. Yes.yes", I moan out, answering his question repeatedly. A couple more thrusts and we both cum on each other, my orgasm taking a toll on me. After calming down and feeling Harry's dick go soft inside me, I look into his eyes. " a million times yes", I say against his lips. He smiles widely and kisses me passionately.

This whole experience has taught me that life can be very difficult. Everyone is dealing with issues left and right, some more intense than the rest. In my case, I lost our baby, got depressed, and surpassed it. Having a support system, whether it’s a family member or a close friend, having someone there who is willing to help you can make the biggest difference in your life. Seeking help doesn't make you weak or a failure, it just means that you need that extra help to become the better version of yourself. Trying to control everything around you will he straining and will cause you to burn out. Take it one step at a time and learn to take it easy from time to time. Always live in the moment and cherish where you are now. Also...always remember to stay true to who you are and never let anyone change you. You're perfect the way you are whether you believe it or not.

#harry edits #harry edward styles #harry fluff #harry smut #hslot #harry styles #smut #1dsmut #harry styles one direction #harry fanfic #harry styles x y/n #harry styles blurb #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #harry styles one shot #hary styles #wattpad #harry's house album

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randomwriteronline · 2 years

Text

He is terrified of that guy.

He supposes he should feel a sort of kinship with that guy. Both misplaced. Both taken in. Maybe Irida or someone in his village keeps reminding him that because he’s an outsider there are still people who don’t trust him, like Kamado does. But in this case he would say they are right.

He doesn’t like that guy.

He doesn’t like his haunted face, and his steely gaze into your soul, and his pale skin like he has never been in the sun, and how he talks loud and careful like he’s acting out a play, and how his torn coat and hat hang on him. He heard that somewhere there’s a Ghost Pokémon that is a doll full of hatred: if he tries to imagine it now, he thinks it would be pretty similar to that guy. He already looks so much like a ghost that he wouldn’t be surprised if, by touching him, he would dissolve into a horrible mess of rotten meat and bones.

He almost prefers Melli to that guy.

He definitely prefers the Professor to that guy, but that goes without saying because the Professor is the closest to his mom he can get here, and he’s very kind. And he also prefers Volo and the Captain to that guy, even though they have their own things that make him tense. And he prefers Iscan, because he’s a sweetheart, and he prefers Mai because she is cool, and he prefers Calaba because even though she was really rude at first she apologized and was very nice ever since. He definitely prefers Adaman and Irida, because they both trust him. Hell, he’d prefer any of the people in Jubilife, even Beni, who looks at him like he wants to cut off his ears, over that guy. He’d even prefer Kamado over that guy.

That guy is...

“I would like to ask you a question.” that guy had said suddenly once, on he training grounds: “Do you remember where you come from?”

Mom taught him that if you’re too scared, don’t talk, but stare. That throws people off. Makes them uncomfortable. Makes things awkward. Nobody wants to stay where things are awkward.

So he had tried doing that, closed in his own shoulders.

They had looked at each other for what felt like an hour.

“I apologize.” that guy had said: “I was far too forward. Please ignore my words.”

That guy is...

(That guy’s words in Wayward Cave - he thinks about them sometimes, the things he barely remembers. A Fire type Pokémon partner. A relative, maybe. Train lingo. Hidden Moves. That’s it. That’s his entire world. All he knows is battling and some vague images circling in his brain. Does he live anywhere? The only place he always sees him at is the training grounds. He leaves the Highlands and just stands there for hours and hours, staring into nothingness. He doesn’t talk to anyone. Waits for a challenger. Nobody wants to challenge that guy. He is too strong.)

(That guy’s Pokémon are terrifying. Strong. He trains them. Nobody else trains Pokémon. Not like him. Not even he trains his Pokémon like that guy. And he seems to have so many. And he trains all of them. Is it all he can think of? Training Pokémon? Is it all he can do aside from warden duties?)

(That guy - does he have any friends? Does he have any human friends? Nobody from the Pearl Clan who comes to Jubilife ever talks to him. Nobody seems to know him. They wonder where he came from, but know nothing of him. The wardens seem to think of him as an aquaintance. Even Irida thinks that. They don’t talk to him. Neither does he talk to them.)

That guy is...

He watched him cry once.

It was...

He didn’t think someone could cry so hard yet so quietly.

That guy is...

“Do you... Do you remember where you came from?”

That time he had nodded. Terrified. He couldn’t stand those white eyes staring into him.

“That’s good,” that guy had said. He had looked... He had looked something he had not been able to place at that moment. He had looked strange in his horrifying way of existing. “That’s good.”

That guy is...

Miserable.

And maybe that should make it all easier. Should make that guy less scary. Because he is pitiable despite all of himself, despite his mangled form and blood-freezing gaze and void where his soul should be. Despite the chill that sticks to him even under the hottest sun.

But when he looks at him - when that horrible gaze sits on him -

He can’t find it in himself not to tremble.

That guy is terrifying.

#pokémon #pokemon legends arceus #submas ingo #pokemon rei #random writing #hey what if the protag was so scared by ingos Whole Deal that they didnt grow a bond with him or even just speak his name #'why did you do this??' i have no idea #'but does this fear pass? do they go home?' I Have No Idea #hmmmmm suddenly dont like this. fuck #anyways have it

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ecemichi · 1 year

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Ring.A.Bell chapter 5

Leo: Anzu's getting married?! Married married?! You sure she's not gettin' carried instead?!

Midori: Carried? Where would she even be carried…?

Midori: Haah… By the looks of it, Tsukinaga-senpai doesn’t know what’s up with Anzu-san either.

Mao: Well, we don't really know for sure if she's getting married... But it's been on our minds ever since we saw her earlier.

Leo: Wahaha! There's no way, right? If you keep saying stupid stuff like that, Anzu'll get pissed at you, y'know?

Midori: But she was so happy after buying that magazine… How else could you explain that?

Leo: Well... Anzu was probably just looking at it for some new outfit references. Or something like that, I dunno!

Mao: That's what we thought, too, but... Anzu’s mostly taking care of idols from Yumenosaki and Reimei now, right?

I don't think a bridal magazine'd be very useful when making outfits for any of them…

Leo: Oh, I got it...!

Mao: Wait, what've you got?

Leo: Somethin' right out of these genius brain cells out of mine! Thank you, Holmes! Colombo!

— Anzu's gonna make all of us wear dresses! Wedding dresses!

Midori & Mao: No way.

Leo: What the hell?! How're you so sure, huh?! You can't just dismiss the possibility, you know?!

Mao: Do you really think people would want to see us in wedding dresses...?

Midori: ...I don’t even want to wear one in the first place. I’m nearly 180 centimeters tall — I wouldn’t look the slightest bit cute if I crossdressed. It’d be a different story if someone asked me to wear a mascot costume instead, though.

Leo: Really? But Wataru makes a perfectly lovely lady, you know~?

Mao: Please don't lump us in with that guy. If we did it, we'd probably just cause a commotion.

Leo: Like I said, you can't just rule it out! Stop using your stupid common sense! Ahh, what a waste, what a waste! Anyone should be able to wear anything they want, that's what Naru'd say.

Midori: Eeh… Why’s he acting like we’re the ones who wanna wear it…? How depressing…

Mao: This convo’s going nowhere... Anyway, the circumstantial evidence we've got on hand doesn't really line up with your theory.

Leo: It doesn't, huh~?

Mao: Putting that aside, you're surprisingly calm even after hearing all that, huh? Anyone'd be shook if they heard this sorta news outta the blue, but you're as cool as a cucumber…

Leo: Wahaha! ☆ You can keep the compliments coming, y'know~? I don't mind at all!

Also, it's more like it hasn't really sunk in yet? This came outta the blue — you can’t just expect me to accept that she’s getting married!

Midori: That’s a normal reaction, I think. I probably wouldn’t have made a big deal out of it if I’d only heard the story, either.

Mao: That's true. I wouldn't have believed it at all if we hadn't seen it with our own two eyes.

Oh, I know. Tsukinaga-senpai, how about you try imagining your little sister getting married? That way you can imagine what it'd be like for Anzu to suddenly get married too.

Leo: ... Ruka-tan... getting married...?

Mao: Yeah, exactly. I bet it’d be easier to get what we mean if you thought of a family member.

Leo: Ruka-tan... suddenly getting up and leaving me...? And... with some guy I don't even know...?

Mao: U-Uh, Tsukinaga-senpai...? You seem a little…

Midori: Eeek...! Your eyes are scary!

Leo: Grrrrrah! Where's he at?! Where's the guy tryin' to steal my Ruka-tan away from meeeee?!

Midori: EEEEEPK!!!!

Mao: Uwaah?! Did I cross the line or something?!

Midori: You didn’t just cross it, you went two feet deep!

Mao: Geez, what happened to his composure?! I thought he’d be the last to snap, but he was the first! Who said he was cool as a cucumber?!

Midori: You’re the one who called him that!

Leo: IS IT YOOOOU?! YOU'RE THE ONE STEALIN' MY RUKA-TAN FROM ME, AIN'T YAAAA!

Mao: Uwah?! I-I'm not doing anything like that, Tsukinaga-senpai, calm down!

It's fine! Your little sister's not leaving your side, okay?! That's why you've gotta come back down to earth!

Leo: ...She's really not?

Mao: ...! (Nodding like his life depends on it.)

Leo: Of course she's not~! Yup yup, there's no way she would! My cute Ruka-tan'd never leave me! She loves me, after all~! I love her too! I loooove her to bits 'n pieces!

Midori: Haah… I'm so glad he calmed down…

Mao: Yeah, let's never touch that topic ever again…

Leo: Huh? Hold on a second. Ruka-tan's not getting married, but Anzu is?

Mao: What? Uh, well... Maybe not, but we've been thinking that maybe she is…

Leo: This is terrible, you know?! How the hell're you two actin' so carefree about this, huh?! Don’t just stand there, you should be panicking too!

Mao: Huh!? W-Wait, Tsukinaga-senpai, where’re you going?!

Midori: ...Haah. I feel like we went to the wrong person for help… How depressing...

Mao&Leo TL: Peace

Midori TL: me

JP Proof: 310mc

ENG proof:ryuseipuka

←previous →next

#ring.a.bell #takamine midori #isara mao #tsukinaga leo

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dreaminggoblin · 8 months

Text

Wolventraum - Chapter 6

We were rocked about in the carriage, squeezed between two nervous travellers and their mountain of luggage. It was awkwardly silent as the horses trotted along the road at an easy pace, and the driver seemed determined to hit every single rock jutting from the unpaved ground, every rain-filled hole. Every time he stopped the carriage, Lucie and I were nearly flung into the other two, or got bruised by their suitcases and boxes. After two days, we decided to continue on foot for a while, much to everyone’s relief. It would feel like it took forever, but at least we'd end up with fewer broken bones.

When we started it, the march back to headquarters felt much like it had the first time I had gone there, barely thirteen years old, only this time it wasn't my guardian who walked with me, but my friend.

“Penny for your thoughts,” Lucie said and clapped my shoulder. “Are you getting sentimental on me?”

I gave her a half-hearted grin. “Just feels like way back when I first came to headquarters. The walk is easier this time, though.”

“Must've been rough on a kid,” she said. “I got there by carriage, mostly, and horseback. Isharn tried to make it as easy on me as possible.”

“Isharn? Really?” Our stone-hearted weapons master had personally picked up a recruit? “You're joking.”

Lucie shrugged. “Not like I asked him to. He was passing by my village on a hunt with Edwin, and saw me mess about with my illusions, and then told my parents he was gonna take me somewhere I could learn how to use them without causing anyone trouble. They said that as long as I got to send letters home sometimes, they'd let me go. I think they were relieved to have some peace and quiet.”

“They just let you go with a stranger? Even if he was a Hunter, that's still, you know...”

“They probably thought I could just escape with my illusions if anything went wrong. Not their best move as parents, but in hindsight, it was the right decision. I mean, they did both stay for a day or two at our home to explain what the order was all about and what I was going to do and learn.” She shrugged. “Isharn even did a lot of paperwork for them about it all, and informed our mayor, and Edwin stayed behind to visit someone in the farms around.”

“Still,” I said, but didn't finish the sentence. Lucie was from the countryside, which was a much safer place than the town orphanage playing at being a boarding school I'd grown up in, unless monsters or bandits showed up. But with those, you could always tell when something was about to happen.

We walked in silence for a while, until I eventually said, “I'll have to rethink my opinion of him, huh.”

Lucie shook her head and laughed. “He wasn't much different outside the training sessions, but at least he fixed my Stuffles up every time I tore him.”

“Why am I only now—what is Stuffles?”

“My stuffed donkey. He should still be in my room, I'll show you. Would you expect Isharn to be good at sewing?” She made motions with her hand like she was stitching something back together. “Like this, every other week. Never taught me how to do it. Vrehden told him to at least take care of me, since he'd convinced my parents to let me go at that age.”

“How old were you?”

“Ten, I think. Not much for a small girl in a small village, not when everyone already thought I was weird and scary because of my magic.” She kicked a pebble off the road. “I do go back from time to time. The kids love me now, they always go on about wanting to see my magic, and everyone else appreciates some distraction from their routines.”

“Heh. I can imagine.” I'd always loved when someone secretly put on a magic show in my town. Not that I was ever allowed to see them, but I got good at sneaking out, and even better at sneaking back in.

Lucie's eyes wandered over the horizon, for a moment lost in the memories. Then, she said, “What about you?”

I looked at my feet as I talked. “Thirteen, freshly kicked from the boarding school for being a menace to the teachers. I saw a recruitment poster in town, and went from there. Don't remember who took me to headquarters in the end, a few older recruits and the Hunter training them, I think.”

Lucie chuckled to herself. “Somehow, I can't see you menacing your teachers. You were basically our model student.”

“I learned something I cared about,” I said with a shrug. “I don't care about cutlery etiquette, but even back then I thought monsters from the stories were fascinating. I think the only teacher who liked me was the one who taught us reading and languages, she kept using these stories for us. Can't remember her name, though.”

“Shame. Ever wanna go back and show them what you made of yourself?”

I laughed. “Gods, no. They wouldn't even recognise me.”

“Not with that face, yeah.”

I elbowed her in the side for that one. “Not with this name, either.”

Lucie perked up. “What'd they call you?”

I shrugged. “Nothing I would respond to now.”

“When did you pick Reaper?”

“When I was a stupid kid on the road to becoming a monster Hunter. They always had such descriptive names and titles in the stories, Lucien The Beastbreaker and stuff like that. I wanted one too.” I smiled bitterly at the memory. A name that sounded less like impending doom would have made hunts on which I actually had to talk to people a lot easier. But if a child gets to pick their own name for the first time, they're bound to come up with some weird things.

Lucie nudged me. “What other options were there?”

“Horrible ones. I won't tell you.” I laughed. “Reaper is the most harmless of them. And the shortest.”

For a full day after this, Lucie tried to get names out of me that didn't make the cut, but I held firm, and in retaliation made her tell me what it was like being adopted by Isharn The Stone-hearted, our chief instructor when we were older, and one of the most famous Hunters I had ever met. He had no mercy for his students, and his prey surely got the impression he didn't even know what the word meant. For someone who was worse at magic than me, he had an impressive record, achieved with swordsmanship, wit, and probably good luck. And he wasn't that much older than us. Lucie and I had come to headquarters at almost the same time, and Isharn hadn't been a certified Hunter for more than a few years at that point. I hadn't seen him much when I last visited, but he looked like he was in his early forties at most.

When Lucie and I had gone to separate outposts for specialised training, he had gone with me, rather than being among mages. He hated them, as far as we knew at the time, so I struggled to wrap my head around how he had managed to raise Lucie into the woman she was now, with all her quirks and all her magic. But when we had met again at the headquarters manor, after the incident at her school, he almost, almost, fussed over her like a worried father.

“It's so weird how we still have our rooms at headquarters when we're staying there maybe once a year,” I said. “All recruits start out there, they should use our rooms for the new kids.” We often sent in our status reports by letter, after all, unless we were close enough to drop by. But most of us hunted at least a few days' march away from headquarters.

“We need a safe place to come back to,” Lucie said. “I mean, it was a manor with a few buildings when we were kids, but last time I went, it looked more like a fortress.”

I thought for a moment. It was summer when I last left. “Weren't they even building new barracks? Wonder when we'll hit the outer wall with our fields and houses.”

She shrugged. “Give it a few years and Vrehden will have to grovel before the local lords for more land.”

I frowned. “Didn't go well last time he did it.”

Lucie nodded. “They don't like him.”

“Neither do you.”

“You don't like him either,” she shot back. “I'm surprised Isharn gets along with him.”

“Well, they are both kind of arrogant,” I said, holding up first my index finger, then more as I added, “they're both around the same age and probably know each other from training. Before Vrehden became boss, he and Isharn often hunted together, or at least in the same region, and someone needs to look big and scary behind Vrehden, so he'll probably have some reason or method to keep Isharn around.”

Lucie glared at me. “They'd both smack you across the training fields for talking like that.”

I laughed. “I know. Good thing they're not here. Honestly, I try to stay out of the higher ups' business as much as anyone with sense, but Vrehden isn't doing a good job. Especially not with new Hunters. He basically sent me to a death trap for my first solo hunt, which he shouldn't have done in the first place because rule number two, and blamed it on me when I complained.”

She sighed. “Not just you, I think others had pretty much the same experience. Linea didn't come back from hers. I'm pretty sure Elias almost didn't, either. Fucker's been ignoring our no-solo-hunts rule since even before he became boss,but until enough people get sick of him and call for his demotion, he'll stay where he is. And at least he's keeping up with the paperwork. Which, I remind you, we'll need to fill out extra forms for because we've been gone from headquarters for more than six months. Or did you write letters in that time?”

I groaned. Our Masters and senior Hunters chose our leader, usually, but Vrehden's predecessor had specifically called for him to take his place, and no one had an official opinion on why. I was still a year from my first hunt when that happened, but I vaguely remembered the old headmaster being wilfully ignorant of our no booze rule the years that I'd been at headquarters. Only rumours, of course, no investigation had ever taken place when the old man suddenly dropped dead one evening. He had been very old, at least by our standards.

We continued our walk in silence until we reached a small, rundown tavern by the roadside. It was evening, and getting cold, so the light coming out of the windows and the crack under the door was inviting.

The owner of the tavern almost had us kicked out the moment we walked in. “The hell does your kind want here? Ain't no monsters here, get out!” he shouted from behind the safety of his counter top.

“We're paying customers,” I said, and held up a purse that very obviously contained coins. “No hunting in these parts, anyway.” Not yet. It was likely that this tavern and the handful of rickety houses around it would encounter thralls eventually when they spread out from the capital, or some other kind of monster. Any collection of lives eventually ended up with something going bump in the night, whether it was of their own making or something wandering in, curious or hungry.

The tavern keeper begrudgingly accepted my money, and pointed us to a table in the corner, furthest from his other paying customers. “Food will be brought soon,” he said. “Wait there. No rooms left.”

“Thank you kindly, sir,” Lucie said, and made a point to place her sword well within sight when she sat down on the old chair.

I lifted my chair and moved it next to Lucie's so that the only things behind me were a dirty log wall and our backpacks. “Such friendly atmosphere, don't you think?”

She kicked me under the table, then whispered, “They probably think we lure monsters in just by existing.”

I shrugged. “Can't be helped. Run me through the detox spell again?”

“You're actually worried they'll poison our food?” But she went through the motions again anyway. It was a basic running your hands over the plate or glass and mumbling something, one of the first things any recruit was taught before going off to specialised training, but it was very close to the limits of my magic skills. Studious as I had been, I had never had patience for the heavy tomes like Lucie and other students of magic did. I had always preferred swords and monster trivia.

The food we were brought wasn't poisoned, but we made sure to detox it just in case. It was a simple, sad meal, stale bread with bland soup, way worse than what other people were served, but a warm meal was a warm meal, and I even found a few bits of cooked chicken and potatoes in the broth.

We slept in the stables that night, and moved on after breakfast, not stopping in the tiny market to buy more supplies. We still had enough for a few days, and Lucie said she'd rather get water from a stream than the village well. It didn't seem like the people would have sold us anything at fair prices, anyway, judging by their spitting and cussing as we passed.

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#dreaming goblin writes #Wolventraum #my writing #writeblr #werewolves #vampires #fantasy #fantasy writeblr #fantasy writer #fantasy writing #dreaming goblin writes books #writers on tumblr #original writing #creative writing

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aether-wasteland-s · 1 year

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15 questions tag

Thanks to @sergeantnarwhalwrites for the tag! I'm gonna do this for Cassian from TDE, and hand this over to: @chuuyas-beloved , @brieflyinfatuated

1. Are you named after anyone?

I am actually! Cassian was my grandfather's name. My mother thought it'd be a nice sentiment cos it was a family thing, and he only ever had daughters...

2. When was the last time you cried?

I'd say I'm fairly good at keeping myself in check. The last time I properly cried has to be before all this, when my father passed. I say "passed" as if that helps me just not think about what happened, but that ain't important right now

3. Do you have kids?

That I do! We had that strange deal with the map maker, I met the first person who could make me feel like I wasn't third wheeling around Marco and Antony... And here we are now. I've got a son. His name is Nathaniel, and he's a blessing

4. Do you use sarcasm?

Ah. You got me there. I am pretty sarcastic, but in my defense, I use it like a tool, i.e. when someone really really deserves it

5. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Depends on the situation, I think. First thing I noticed about Antony was that he seemed way too lax about the fact that I'd stolen from him, and it was Marco's quickness to trust, Herron's ever-moving gaze, and Tilly's laugh. I guess it kinda depends on the person too

6. What’s your eye color?

Weird, first thing I'd say. Kinda... Melted sugar, but there's a bit of green in there somewhere... It's a very weird mix.

7. Scary stories or happy endings?

I gotta say, I prefer a happy ending over facing the unknown. Done enough of that in my actual life, I need some certainty, y'know?

8. Any special talents?

I was always told that I have a really strange gift for retaining information, is that something? I tend to remember a lot, and yeah, most of it isn't important, but c'mon, who remembers things that are important all of the time?

9. Where were you born?

The accent gives that one away to most, I'm afraid that's the most obvious thing about me. I was born in the northern isles of Trilliona. I don't remember how long I stayed there, but it was long enough to make it very obvious..

10. What are your hobbies?

I tell you what, ask anyone, and they'll tell you that I made archery part of my personality. I can't say it's a hobby, though, it's more of a habit at this point. May as well be my job... Anyway, a real hobby would be disassembling stuff and tryna see if I can put em back together. It's kinda fun, keeps me busy too..

11. Do you have any pets?

Can you imagine me with a dog? That'd be brilliant I can't lie, but alas, at the moment that's not the case. One day, I hope...

12. What sports do you play/have played?

I've pretty much been doing archery for most of my life. That's maybe the main thing, of course, but I've had a bit of experience in other things. Swordfighting was never taken beyond a couple years of trying, but I'll admit that was intense fun.

13. How tall are you?

I am not sure of that exactly, but somewhere between 5'10" and 6'0". I don't have an exact height for that but I do know I'm a good few inches taller than both of the housemates and my wife too, so somewhere around there.

14. Favorite subject in school?

I was always a science guy. I love the idea of chemistry and the things it can do. Granted, I've never been all that good at physics, cos I'm not all that good at maths, but chemistry was always something else

15. Dream Job?

Engineer. Maybe that's a little easier than it should be, by I would absolutely love to be an engineer, and actually put purpose into taking stuff apart and putting it back together. Yeah, maybe that'd be fun, I'd be into trying that out

#passing the mic → tag games #my ocs #oc: cass #life the queue niverse and everything

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futurewife · 5 months

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actually it's because you haven't found someone with their head on right apparently. i still don't understand why you'd be single...not on purpose. you're friendly and gorgeous and everything

Yeah that's how you know how dire things truly are for me vibe wise hahaha /hj

Whomstever this anon is that keeps sending me nice messages you should know you are an extremely kind and good person and friend. I fear it is more a inherent lacking and wrongness and unlovability (a defectiveness schema basically) that fuels my fear rather than superficial concerns- I believe anyone becomes beautiful in the eyes of someone who loves them.

I struggle to connect with people in real life probably due to some kind of attachment disorder. It's easier for me on the internet, I have time to think and reply and kind of already have some idea of the person I'm talking to which puts me at ease. In real life I have been told that many people just assumed I didn't like anyone I suppose because my social stuntedness/feeling that I have nothing to contribute that anyone would care to hear translates to aloofness and silence.

read more cause I keep promising myself to not go on these depressing rants anymore on tumblr cause i feel it drives people away and makes me vastly scary? and unlikable and this is a SELFSHIPPING!!! blog lol I guess today is not that day

I guess I've just been touchier about it lately cause I keep having these long hysterical crying fits about it at night. I would try and explain it to my irls but I feel it is something only other chronically alone and isolated people can really relate to. Like the creep of the feelings of warmth or kindness or love just not being meant for people like you or that you're undeserving of it, to the point where you feel pathetic and idiotic for even having the audacity to imagine a fairytale happy ending happening or being chosen over anyone else. I'd be inclined to tell him to turn around and walk away because there are other girls easier to love and deal with and I'm actually saving him a lot of trouble and no, he doesn't want me and I'm sorry for being deceptive.

MAN!!!!! I know it's not true and I'm only 25. But that's 25 with no experiences at all. It freaks me out to think a lot of people have had their first love or had relationships as teenagers by this point already. It makes me feel like I'm not competitive, and I don't have anything else to compensate for...me being me. Who wants to spend all that time getting to know me and dealing with my inexperience and issues and the aloofness and the fear when at the end of the day the reward is literally just me and there are 4 billion women on earth?

I think it's a terrible cycle I am in where I feel deep in my bones I'm a miserable little stain on existence with nothing to offer or present to other people so I try and minimise it as much as possible and isolate myself like cutting along the dotted lines of my own life. I feel guilty sometimes for trying to imagine my f/os comforting me in the middle of it all even though that's like one of my biggest fantasies hahaha

#do not give your kids mommy issues!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol

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m1ckeyb3rry · 10 months

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hii i have returned with my ramblings on SITH like i do every chapter lol :))

omg the mention of friedrich being “scary looking” reminded me of that time u said that only the mc genuinely finds him handsome & i still have not recovered from that /pos

I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABT THAT TIME FRIEDRICH BEAT HER UP DURING TRAINING, THE MEMORIESSS

i love how much falco looks up to the mc & how this chapter kinda showed her being a mentor to him, it was so sweet <3 falco being out of breath from JOGGING is so real, like he’s just like me fr we’re both terrible at running

I CALLED IT THAT FRIEDRICH WOULD INHERIT THE JAW, ALL THE SIGNS WERE POINTING TOWARDS HIM LMFAO

the irony of colt being the first of the trio to inherit his titan & also being the first who will die. idk if u plan on diverging from the canon plot & having him live or just sticking with canon plot, but the “i’ll be the first” line rlly hits hard either way, & it’ll hit especially hard if he still dies.

now that i think abt it, the trio rlly is just the found family trope & im gobbling that shit up bro, i love them with all my heart 🫶 i feel like they’re not only soulmates, but also the “our fates are intertwined in every universe” trope as well. so even if one of them dies & the other two have to live on w/o them or two of them die & the last has to preserve their memory, all 3 of them will meet again in another lifetime. they just can’t be separated (they come in a set LMFAO). that’s my take on their relationship at least.

i hope u like my theories & takes lol. when im super invested in smth, i always like talking abt it & going in-depth bc that’s just what i like to do. even if i get some shit wrong (when theorizing or analyzing), that’s ok, bc im just having fun & enjoying smth im interested in :))

hope ur doing well & taking care of urself!! remember to hydrate & get lots of rest. and dont overwork urself (even tho that’s prolly easier said than done). <3

— 🪐

HIII I love your ramblings I always smile when I get the notifications!!

LMAOOO I would like to slightly revise that and add that friedrich isn’t really considered ugly by anyone either he just always looks 0.5 inches away from snapping so people are too busy being scared of him to think he’s handsome. Ofc the mc knows him so well that she sees past that and can appreciate him for what he is <3

HAHAHA IT WAS SO LONG AGO THEY WERE SUCH LITTLE BABIES BACK THEN!! So much has happened since then 🙁

I wanted to somewhat show Y/N being a good person again since we’ve seen so many chapters of her struggling and overcoming her faults and traumas. She’s definitely not a perfect person but she can be very kind at times and she is canonically super good with kids so I thought showing her and falco bonding and her doing something for someone other than herself would balance out the heaviness of everything post-athyae. falco is so sweet I actually love him sooo much but I was lowkey dying writing him in this chapter because he’s just so hopeless 😭 I would like to add that in the running scene Y/N is the one jogging…my man falco is SPRINTING to keep up with her 😩 up to interpretation whether it’s because “slow” for Y/N is fast for like anyone else or because falco is just really not athletically blessed.

I feel like friedrich being the jaw titan is the most obvious choice. He’s way too slippery (does that even make sense?? Idk how else to describe it) to be the armored titan and way too independent to be the colossal, he could be the cart but tbh Y/N just exemplifies the cart to me I couldn’t see anyone else inheriting it, colt being the next beast has been a thing since like the first chapters of the fic, and he just…is not a girl so I can’t imagine him as the female titan.

I won’t spoil the trio’s fates, but writing that scene knowing their futures was definitely painful. I’m trying to write and update more often so you don’t have to wait years to find out what happens to them because there is SO much planned for the future of this story. I’ve been struggling because the past two mini arcs (which were titled return to liberio and warrior’s welcome if you were wondering) have been the hardest to write so far. They’re a lot more introspective and focused on Y/N’s mental development, conflict, and recovery, so it was a lot of just “people visiting houses” with inner monologues as opposed to plot and external conflict. The next mini arc is very different though so I’m excited to get to that!! One more chapter of warrior’s welcome and then I’m finally free 😭

I ADOREEEE FOUND FAMILY!! That’s why endure and SitH are my favs, I feel like they both have their own versions of the found family tropes that make me feel so 😫 but the trio and the endure crew are definitely super different. like the endure found family is just a bunch of siblings (case in point Y/N and Jean) but the trio defies categorization. They’re in love but they’re best friends but they’re somehow more than that?? Idk their dynamic isn’t something I’ve written before but it’s definitely one of the most interesting I think!! (I’d say it’s my favorite but my favorites are endure jean and y/n, endure eren and y/n, and promise y/n and tullia, with an honorary mention to endure y/n and tullia)

I LOVE YOUR THEORIES SO MUCH!! I won’t confirm or deny if they’re right because I don’t want to spoil but I love reading them and responding to them so much. It makes me sosososo happy that you’re so invested in this random story I decided to write on a whim one day and that you’re having as much fun with it as I am. Your asks motivate me sm because with a story like SitH it can sometimes feel like I’m only writing for myself (which is good because it gives me creative freedom but sometimes demotivating as there’s no engagement)

Thank you so much and remember to take care of yourself as well!!

#ship in the harbor #answered asks

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daintyduck99 · 2 years

Note

Ash prompts ash prompts

100, Tía Victoria & Reggie (platonic) ???? I have been meaning to ask anyone for a Victoria prompt and you are the lucky winner

This is set in the same universe as these last perfect days, which is absolutely lovely and everyone should read it!

Reggie hadn’t expected to be confronted with so many suits.

He figured Julie would have the difficult choice—dresses come in every shape and color and material imaginable. Suits are just a basic ensemble. Jacket, pants, dress shirt, shoes. It’d taken his mom all of five seconds once to pick out a pair of dress shoes for his dad to wear to a work event—the only real choice had been whether to get them in brown or black.

Whatever store they went to—it was so long ago that he barely remembers—it was nothing like the ones in this outlet mall Victoria and Rose have scoped out. They’ve been scarily coordinated about this whole trip, actually, aside from Victoria’s insistence that Rose should use a wheelchair and Rose’s vehement claims that she could still walk—which had also been—

Not scary. Maybe—a little intimidating—

Loud in the way that makes his body tense like a spring, ready to fly away at any given moment.

They’d quieted when Julie took his hand, though, with Rose relenting that she’d send Julie back for the chair if she needed it, and hadn’t made it into a big fuss, for which he’s grateful.

Julie had held his hand until they’d had to split up, stretching her arm to let go at the last possible second. Then she’d waved goodbye in that adorably awkward way of hers, and he’d waved back despite the nerves gnawing at the pit of his stomach, though they’d lessened a little bit when she and Rose gave him identical grins before disappearing into the nearest store.

Now he’s surrounded by a sea of suit jackets—just the jackets—and drowning in the options Victoria’s tossing out and his head is spinning—how are there rules about the buttons—and he has to make the right choices so he doesn’t ruin Julie’s look which will surely be flawless and—

Needless to say, the nerves are back in full force. He chews his lip as his eyes slide over all of the options, which are starting to blur together and look as identical as he thought they were.

Not to mention the sheer amount of dollar signs—

“Breathe, mijo.”

A set of warm hands squeeze his shoulders, and he dutifully expels a pent-up sigh. Victoria swims into focus with concern in the intense set of her frown and her eyes.

“I didn’t mean to throw you into the deep end. We’ll find something that you like, okay? I’ll sit outside the dressing room all night if I need to. Bueno?”

He hesitates before he opens his mouth, and she wags her finger in his face.

“And don’t you dare say anything about the cost. Don’t even look at the price tags. Prom is supposed to be fun—let me spoil you. You kids can return the favor by spoiling me once I’ve decided I’ve reached old age. Plus, I get to brag about you to the ladies in my pilates class.”

He flushes and mumbles, “I’m sure it’d be easier if I understood any of this stuff.”

Victoria flaps her hand and takes his arm, gently guiding him through the rows of suits.

“Pah. You don’t need to know the difference between a notch and a peak lapel to know what you like. You’ll know when you see it, and you’ll know for sure when you try it on.”

Still, with every stitch and every compliment she heaps on him when he opens the curtains, he sidesteps with a joke and dances around how nothing feels right, and some suits are downright uncomfortable, and he can’t imagine standing beside Julie looking like someone he’s not—

But he doesn’t know how he’s going to stand beside her looking like exactly who he is. He has a sinking feeling that he doesn’t translate to a suit.

The more nervous he gets, the more and more self-deprecating stuff starts to fall out of his mouth, even as Victoria’s purses severely each time. He shuffles his feet and tries not to shrug as she plucks—in vain—at the large blazer he’s wearing. He has no idea why he grabbed it—desperation possibly—but it’s at least two sizes too big, and he huffs a laugh.

“If I was taller, or—”

“Reggie.” Victoria lifts his chin. Her eyes rage with a fierce compassion that he’s seen in Rose’s and Julie’s before, and her voice is taut with conviction as she says, “There is nothing I would change about you. Alright? Don’t talk about yourself like that.”

He swallows around a lump in his throat. “Really?”

“Really, mijo. The suits are what’s not working. You’re a wonderful boy, and Julie thinks so, too. Why do you think she said yes? To stand next to a Ralph Lauren? No. She wants to dance with Reggie Peters. And she will like whatever you wear as long as you like it. So let’s get back out there and comb through every suit until we find one you actually like. Comprendes?”

“Do you—” He chews his lip and looks away. “Do you think I’ll find one?”

She shrugs, then finally releases his chin, rewarding him with a smile as he keeps his head up.

“Maybe not. But again—it doesn’t matter. Whatever you find may not be a suit. I’ll put you in a dress too, if you want—”

He splutters, but she blithely continues as if he hasn’t made a sound.

“—and when you see the thing you like, you’ll know. We’ll keep looking until you find it.”

While he has—thoughts—to unpack about the dress thing, the thing he ends up finding is a red jacket with leather lapels in a different store. It’s just—so rockstar, and he can’t stop running his fingers over it. Victoria insists that he try it on despite his protests—he did see the price tag—but as soon as he slides this one on and greets his reflection with a huge grin, this one—

“Now this,” Victoria says with an air of finality, beaming, “this feels right. This feels like Reggie.”

Julie—who goes home wrapped up in the jacket after the dance with stars in her eyes and the ghost of his grin on her lips—evidently thinks so, too.

#ahhhhhh I know you said I could use one of your AU's but I really hope this is okay #I tried to use what all I could remember from our conversations #victoria & reggie #reggie & the molinas lbr #rulie #reggie x julie #ficlets with ash #one hundred compliments #also I never know when to put a read more on these but it was a little over 1k so #these last perfect days #julie and the phantoms #there are also some references to jeremy's album because they just worked and I could lol

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usaigi · 2 years

Text

Marc, Jake & Steven

Lunar sys au character cards | Read all chapters on ao3

Continuation of Birdy calling their dad, Marc finds out

CW: referencing past suicide attempts and past suicide idealization (does not go into detail), discussing mental illness, joking about mental illness

Birdy Spector Tuesday – 3:12 PM

Attachment: Fullhouse-Only-It’s-In-My-Head.ppt Lunar-sys.docx image_642.jpeg

I made the powerpoint when we first started seeing our therapist but some of the information has changed. At the time, I only knew about Marc, Steven, Jake, and myself.

Steven and I made another document with some info about the others

I know SMJ made another document that’s like a history/timeline of everything we’ve been through but they won’t show it to me 😒

Which is bs because I literally have all the trauma for trying to unalive ourselves but they think I can’t handle it

Elias Spector – Tuesday 5:26 PM

Thanks. Is it ok if I show this to my therapist? Also, I finished reading two books you recommended, we can talk about it next time you can call.

The cat is very cute.

Sorry to ask but

Since leaving home

Did you attempt again?

Birdy Spector – Wednesday 11:32 AM

Yeah, that's fine

Not me, just Marc I think. He’s doing better though.

Probably lol

Jake’s really good at keeping us safe

He;s funny, Jake made him a jar and now Marc has to drop a dollar every time he makes a joke about dying lmao

Also whenever Daniela is mean

or anyone says someone mean about themselves

Although

It’s less funny when he makes me do it 😒

Elias Spector – Wednesday 12:57 PM

I’m just glad you’ll are safe now

I understand you dislike labels but just for my comprehension, is it safe to say that you didn’t have BPD and/or Bipolar disorder? Was it just different alters fronting?

Birdy Spector - Wednesday 4:46 PM

Not sure 🤷🏼

What gets confusing is that while yes we are separate alters and all but we do all share the same brain, body, hormones, etc. And even when we’re not fronting/co-con, we can still have influence

So its hard to tell if we are acting a certain way because of another disorder or if its related to DID

Steven and I were reading about how childhood trauma shapes dna, brain development, how bodies react, etc it’s wild ngl

Maybe depression with mixed features? We’re testing out some new mood stabilizers to see if they help. Not everyone is good at logging the effects/side effects Steven and I are the only ones that are super consistent but I don’t actually front that often. It’s sooo exhausting trying to get everyone on the same page 😩

And it’s not that I don’t like labels, I justthink it was super frustrating how doctors would keep throwing whatever label at us and just hoped it’d stick

I felt like I was hoarding mental illnesses lmao like damn lunar sys leave some for everyone else

U know anyone who wants some? Currently got a buy one get one free special lmao

Elias Spector - Wednesday 4:48 PM

I imagine that’s difficult. How have you been doing otherwise?

Birdy Spector - Wednesday 4:50 PM

I joined Steven and Marc for some sessions this week. Three times a week is too much. since I was there we talked about the stuff that happened when we were younger. Jake was also there, but he only watched

EMDR is terrible, I hate it so much

But…

It’s easier to open up to the psychologist after talking to you about it first

But I’ve been fighting with Marc less so that’s probably good. Although he still won’t tell me about what he remembers and he even forbid Steven from telling me too. Jake has always been weird about it and Daniela is still pretty scary

Can you please tell me?

Elias Spector - Wednesday 5:05 PM

Be patient with Marc. I don’t want to overstep any boundaries, I think it’s best if you talk to the others about it.

Marc isn’t scooping, he’s totally fine with his alters having boundaries and privacy. He just happened to come across Birdy’s email account–which she stayed signed into–and stumbled across a chat thread with who else but Elias Spector.

His vision turns red, scrolling through dozens and dozens of messages, images, and call receipts. The earliest message is dated just over 6 weeks ago, although the first couple of messages imply that they were already in contact before then.

‘Steven. Steven! Steven!!’ Marc yells out internally, hoping to wake Steven up from wherever he is in the inner world.

‘What?’ He says grouchily, slowly stepping towards the front.

‘Look at this shit. What the hell was she thinking? Did you know she was in contact with our dad?’ Marc says as Steven takes control of the body to look at the screen.

‘Marc, you need to calm down,’ Steven says, still working his way through all the messages, he can feel Marc in the headspace making trenches from pacing around so much.

‘How dare you tell me to calm down? I can’t even trust my own fucking alters to not go behind my back. This is fucking Khonshu all over again!’

‘What’s going on, are you doing something dumb?’ Jake jumps in, suddenly appearing in the front conference room, as if he appearing out of thin air. He must have sensed their stress level rise.

‘Respectfully Jake, go fuck yourself. This isn’t about you.’ Marc snaps back, irritated he had the nerve to stick his head into this.

‘It looks like Birdy has been a messaging dad. Talking on the phone too, I think.’ Steven tells him, essentially ignoring all of Marc’s wishes.

‘She what? ’ Jake asks in disbelief, getting closer to the front to get a better look at the messages in question.

‘That sneaky little bra–’

‘Marc, stop it. I’m mad too but I won’t let you talk about her that way.’ Jake interrupts him in his tracks.

‘Oh of course you’re on her side. She’s always hiding behind you. And we all know you’re an expert at making decisions behind our backs, aren’t you? Tell me, what other secrets have you been hiding from us? Was it actually you that got me kicked out of the military?’ Marc rages with an exasperated outrage, arms wrapped around himself, taking careful steps backwards. Keeping his back against the wall.

Jakes glares at Marc over that comment, standing his ground, he shouts back, ‘Ok fine! Maybe this is my fault! Sorry I didn’t have the heart to tell her the truth about our childhood! You don’t think it hurt me when she talked about how nice and protective her dad was when my dad failed us?’

‘Maybe we all need to take some deep breaths, yeah? I can make us a cuppa–’

‘Steven, your endless optimism and desire to make everything ok is exhausting sometimes. Can you please just shut it?’ Marc says, in a low bitter voice.

In response, Steven shut the laptop close, dropping his head to his hands, ‘Fine! Then I guess I won’t share what I think!’

‘What do you think?’ Jake asks with a heavy sigh.

‘Maybe… we should reach out to dad, it’s obviously helping Birdy. Looking over at his messages he seems accepting. And it looks like he’s in therapy too.’

Marc's knees buckle as his breathing rises, ‘I can’t believe this. Steven, what happened to system cooperation? I can’t believe you’re siding with her.’

‘I’m not siding with anyone.’ Steven replies calmly.

‘Marc, stop it. You’re acting like our mother.’ Jake states sharply and it hits Marc like an asteroid. Marc's mouth opens in shock, his eyes glare, almost as if he's going to attack back but he doesn't. His eyes, rapidly flashing from betrayal to anger to disgust to shame to fear. He slides down to the ground, wrapping his arms around his knee, dropping his forehead onto his forearms.

Even Steven tenses up at that comment.

Exhausted, Jake pulls out his chair from the crescent conference table, pulls out a cigarette from his jacket, and places it between his lips. This is all fake– all of this is happening inside their head, but somehow, the smell of tobacco fills the body’s nostrils.

Jake lets Marc recollect himself for a bit before saying, ‘There are no sides, we are a system. If you yell at her, all the work we’ve done to get her to open up will be for nothing. Tell me, who does Birdy remind you of?’ Jake asks in a stern but calm voice. When Marc doesn’t reply, he says, ‘She acts like we did at that age. Time has always been fuzzy for me but I remember feeling like I had no control over anything. Like adults were quick to dismiss all my problems. I’m guilty of this shit too, I’ve fed into her delusions about how great our dad was and how our mom was too sick to visit her in the hospital. I kept telling myself I was protecting her innocence but maybe I fucked up.

‘I still do that shit with Kid. I know he’s confused but I can’t explain it to him. Maybe I am protecting him, or maybe I’m just trying to protect myself.’

The three of them let words seep, processing Jake's words and the situation. It feels like all the hard work that Marc has done to try to heal, not just suppress, has been for nothing, he still felt like a scared child, abandoned by his parents.

‘Maybe...' Steven says, once some of the initial tension calms down, 'we should think about how our alter didn’t feel comfortable talking to us first before sneaking off to talk to dad. Be honest Marc, how would you have reacted if she asked you for permission?’

‘I would have blown her off…’ Marc mumbles, still hiding his face in shame.

‘Yeah, and I wouldn’t have been any better…’ Jake sighs.

‘Steven, I know you want to talk to dad, I know you don’t see him like I do. But his…indifference almost killed us,’ Marc says softly.

Steven pauses, before warily saying, ‘I think… there’s no growth living in the past and maybe… closure would be good for us.’

#moon knight #moon knight fanfic #marc spector #steven grant #jake lockley #mk lunar sys #layla el faouly #moonscarab #lunar sys & dad arc

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