#kpopfic

[yeeehwa]

A Gift that Keeps on Giving - (k.ys x reader) nsfw

Summary: Yeosang decided to play games, so let the games begin.

Genre and Warnings: smut. afab reader. unprotected sex. use of derogatory terms (slut). one shot. dirty talk. rough sex. dom!yeosang. sub!reader.

Word Count: 4K

Notes: Still getting used to writing smut so please be nice. This is a work of fiction and is not meant to represent any of Ateez at all. This is all for fun.

***

“I have a gift for you,” Yeosang said as he poked his head into the bathroom. You applied the last of your lipstick before turning to address him.

“A gift?” You looked at him, still in his sweatpants and large t-shirt he liked to work out in, and quirked your eyebrow.

“Yes. Now close your eyes and hold your hand out.” He grinned at you, a glint of mischievousness in his eyes.

You did as told, and a thin, lacy material touched your hand. You were surprised when you felt the weight of it.

“Yeo. . . what is this?” you were hesitant to know the answer.

“Open your eyes.”

You slowly peeked one eye open, then the other. What lay in your hand was a black thong, with a tiny vibrator hidden in it. Your eyes widened when you finally processed what he wanted.

“But we have dinner with your friends! I can’t- not when I’ll be around the guys! You know they’ll know!” You argued with him.

“You can.” was all he said. He leaned against the bathroom door frame, arms crossed. He smirked at you. “It’ll make me happy if you wore that tonight.”

You sighed. He pulled the “it’ll make me happy” card, and you were so whipped for him that you couldn’t say no to him. You hang your head, knowing he was going to get you in trouble tonight.

“Okay.”

He smirked again. “Good kitten,” he praised. “Remember, I control when it goes off, the intensity, and how long it goes for.” There was warning in his voice when he said that. He pushed himself off the door frame and snatched you, his hand on the back of your neck as he pulled you towards him in a dominating kiss. Once he pulled away he shot you his signature smirk. “Put them on and fix your lipstick. We’re leaving in 5.” He walked away, leaving you breathless and processing what had just happened.

You knew not to keep him waiting though, so you quickly discarded the panties you had on and replaced them with Yeosongs “gift.” You shook your head as you hiked them up under your dress, cursing the man under your breath.

The vibrator sat snug against your clit. The thin fabric that separated you from the toy doing nothing to stop the chill that ran up your spine in anticipation. You jumped when you felt the vibrations start, knocking over your pile of makeup products. You heard Yeosang laugh from the other room.

“You okay in there?” he yelled down the hall.

“Peachy” you responded in a sickly sweet sarcastic tone.

Yeosang appeared in the doorway again, this time dressed in a black button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, and a pair of black jeans. It was such a gorgeous color against his skin.

“You still have some lipstick,” he points to the area all around his own lips, “there.”

You rolled your eyes at him and grabbed your makeup remover wipes. You held the pack out to him. “You made the mess. You clean it up.”

He smirked at you, grabbed the pack and pulled a wipe out. He beckoned you forward, and you listened. You heard a small little click and the buzzing against your clit started again.

“Now be a good girl and stay still,” Yeosang cooed at you while wiping your face. Your legs quivered as you fought back a moan.

“Yeosanggggg” you whined at him as he pulled away. The buzzing stopped as he threw the wipe away and looked at you.

“I have one rule for tonight.” He looked you in the eyes, Master Yeosang finally coming out to play for a moment. “Do. Not. Cum. You know what’ll happen if you disobey.”

You made a small whining sound at him, but nodded your head. “Yes sir.”

He smirked at you. “Then let’s go.”

***

You walked into the restaurant where you were meeting up with some of Yeosangs and your friends for dinner.

Four of them all stood outside the restaurant, all wearing either black or dark blue jeans with a button down shirt. Seonghwa in pink, Hongjoong in green, Jongho in red, and Yunho in purple. Mingi, Wooyoung and San had their backs towards the rest of you, leaning on the bar and knowing them, probably trying, and failing, to flirt with the female bartender.

The vibrator didn’t go off again until you were in the middle of greeting his friends. Yeosang stood at your side with one arm around your waist, the other in his pocket, where you suspected that stupid remote was hidden.

“Don’t react,” Yeosang murmured in your ear as you approached your friends.

“Hey guys! It’s good t-” you slightly choked when you felt the vibrations start again. Yeosangs hand tightened against your hip and you swallowed. “To see you.” you shuttered out. It stopped once you finished your greeting.

Your friends gave you a weird look, in which Yeosang smirked at them. He’s not exactly broadcasting what’s going on, but the looks that came over their faces meant most of them understood, at least somewhat.

“Excuse me,” a voice came from behind your little party. “How many will there be?” The hostess of the restaurant addressed one of the guys.

“There should be nine of us” Yunho turned to the girl, turning his charm up to his fuckboy setting. He smiled. “We’re just waiting on a few more. They’re just at the bar.” He pointed to them.

The hostess visibly melted at Yunho. Blushing, and suddenly a little nervous, she responded “Okay! I can seat you when your party is ready then.” She quickly turned on her heels and walked away. Yunho laughed at her reaction.

You smacked Yunho in the chest with the back of your hand when he returned to your group. “Do you have to tease her? She’s just trying to do her job.” You playfully scolded him.

“I can’t help how incredible I look! It’s not my fault!” He argued back.

You shook your head and rolled your eyes at him. “You’re so annoying.”

“But you like it.” He batted his eyelashes at you.

“Fuck you Yunho.”

“Only if your boyfriend over there lets me.” He smirked at Yeosang and gave him a teasing look.

Yeosang decided to interject then. One of his hands went to his pocket and you knew he was about to turn the vibrator on again. You tensed up as you felt the first wave of pleasure. “The only one I’d let-” buzz “fuck Y/N” buzz “Out of all of you assholes would be Minig, and that’s only-” buzz buzz buzz buzz “because I know he would be too shy to actually do anything.”

You bit the inside of your cheek to prevent yourself from making a sound. An idea popped into your head as the pleasure rolled through you. Not a good one, and one Yeosang will NOT be happy with you for. But he decided to play tonight, so let the games begin.

Yeosang turned the vibrator off as the hostess returned. She led you to your table and you all sat. You strategically placed yourself in front of Mingi and next to Yunho, with Yeosang on your other side.

Yeosang leaned towards you. “You’re doing well Kitten. We’ll see how long that lasts.” He planted a kiss below your ear.

You smiled back at him. “I’m sure I don’t know what you mean baby.” You gave him a fake hurt expression. “I’m always good.” You winked at him.

The wink made him narrow his eyes at you. “You’re planning something Kitten, aren’t you.”

“If I was, then why would I tell you?” You gave him a cheeky smile and turned to the others at the table.

Throughout the night, Yeosang teased you mercilessly with the vibrator, and you were determined to not let it noticeably affect you. You attempted to ignore him for most of the night, deciding to flirt with Yunho and Mingi. Yunho had picked up on what you were doing and turned his charm on once again, taking every opportunity to push Yeosangs buttons. Meanwhile Mingi just looked flustered and nervous, always glancing over at Yeosang.

By the time your food had arrived, you were the wettest you’ve ever been. You had followed Yeo’s instructions so far. You haven’t come, but you were so close, and also in a foul mood because of it. So when your food was set down in front of you, and he turned the vibrator on AGAIN, you had enough.

“I’ll be right back.” You muttered as you took your napkin and almost threw it on the table. Mingi tried to stop you when you walked past him, sensing something was off, but you sent him a glare and he let you go.

You heard Yeosang’s seat slide against the floor behind you, but you didn’t care. You stormed into the bathroom and locked yourself in a stall. You were more frustrated (sexually) than anything, and you had to get yourself off.

Leaning against the wall, you pulled your panties to the side and started to touch yourself, trying to heighten the feeling that the vibrator was sending through you. You let out a low moan as you got yourself over the edge. You bit your lip to stifle the noises that you were making.

The vibrations stopped as soon as you orgasmed. You knew that he knew. You knew he would be upset with you, but you needed to cum. You pulled your panties fully off, wadded them up in your hand, and walked out of the bathroom.

Yeosang stood outside the door, anger clouded his face. “We’re leaving.”

“Yeosang I-”

He slapped a hand over your mouth as you tried to make excuses. You knew you fucked up. “I said we’re leaving. Don’t argue.”

He turned you around, and his hand pressed against the back of your neck in a possessive way. He led you to the table, whispering in your ear as you walked. “You’re going to apologize to the guys and tell them that we have to go.” The hand on your neck squeezed a bit. “Got it?”

“Yes sir” you whispered back.

He directed you towards the table, where seven pairs of eyes landed on the two of you. You took a deep breath, and Yeosang’s hand squeezed you a little harder and you took a deep breath.

“I’m sorry guys, but we have to go.” You sounded meek and apologetic, much to Yeosang’s approval.

Seven voices started protesting, but Yeosang shushed them with a look. He pushed you towards the door, hand never moving.

Yeosang was very quiet in the car. His hands gripped the steering wheel to the point that his knuckles were white. He was very mad. Everything you tried to speak, he would shoot you a dark look, and you would stop talking.

He pulled into the driveway of your house and turned the car off. You both sat there for a second before you tried to speak again. “Yeosang I-”

“Quiet slut.” Your eyes widened. “I’m pissed enough at you for disobeying me when I gave you clear instructions. Now go inside, go to the bedroom, and strip. Sit on the bed and wait.” He paused, finally looking at you. “Go.”

Clear instructions that you knew not to ignore, you quickly got out of the car and did as told. Stripping quickly as you maneuvered yourself to your bedroom, fully naked, and sat on the bed, waiting in anticipation.

Yeosang took his time to get to you. Knowing that the wait would kill you, but make you wetter the longer he waited. You heard the front door open and close, him kicking off his shoes, then rattling around in the kitchen. You huffed in annoyance, knowing exactly what he was doing.

Slowly, you heard him make his way towards the bedroom. His eyes were still stormy, but seeing that you listened, he gave you a small, approving smile. His black hair was messy, like he had run his hand through it a bit before coming into the room, which was fine by you. The top three buttons of his shirt were undone, giving you a little tease of his muscular chest. He looked slightly disheveled, but in a hot way.

“My good little slut finally listened. I’m almost proud of you” he teased, softly running his hand through your hair and down the side of your face.

You rolled your eyes but knew to stay silent. You knew this was a “punishment” but you both were going to get pleasure from it. You loved it; loved being disobedient so he would be so rough with you to the point of tears.

His hands slowly trailed down your body, giving you chills, and making your core throb in anticipation. In a change of pace, he grabbed your hips and pulled you closer to the ends of the bed, gripped your thighs and spread them. Yeosang walked in between your legs, your face almost pressed against his half naked chest. He roughly gripped your chin, squishing your cheeks together, and made you look up at him.

“Do you know why I’m punishing you Kitten?” He questioned, his other hand softly drawing circles on your thighs, slowly getting closer to your dripping cunt.

You locked eyes with him and nodded.

“Words Kitten.”

“Yes Sir” you whispered. You desperately wanted him to touch you, but you knew he wouldn’t until you were almost begging for it.

“And why is that?”

“I flirted with our friends in front of you. Then I came without permission” you mumbled.

“Louder. I can’t hear you.” His hand left your face and went to your throat, applying light pressure to the sides, but not nearly as hard as you wanted it.

“I flirted with our friends in front of you.”

“And?” He raised one eyebrow at you.

“And I came without permission.”

“So you knew what you were doing, and how I would react, yet you did it anyway?”

“Yes Sir.” Your eyes locked with his.

“Get on the floor. On your knees. I need you to prove how good you can actually be.”

You listened, slowly getting into position. Your legs trembled as you watched him fumble for his belt, the sound of his pants unzipping and clothes hitting the floor. “Let me see you Kitten” he cooed at you. You looked up, his hard cock fully in your face. “Open.”

You did, and he mercilessly shoved his cock into your mouth. It hit the back of your throat, and when you gagged, he still didn’t let up. Your lips closed around his shaft and he let out a low groan. His hand grabbed a fistfull of your hair, and you let out a moan, making his cock vibrate in your mouth. His grip in your hair tightened as he started fucking your mouth.

He was relentless. The tip of his cock hitting the back of your throat with every thrust. Tears started forming in your eyes, at the merciless pace he had set for himself and from the tight grip he had on your hair. Attempting to move your head at all made his grip tighten, and the pull on your hair to hurt even more.

You struggled to breath, drool starting to run down your chin as he fucked into your mouth. “You fucking slut. Flirting with our friends.” He grunted. “In front of me. Knowing-” Groan.”It would rile me up. Look at what the fuck you do to me Kitten.”

He quieted down as he started chasing his own high with your mouth. You knew he was getting close when his breath became heavier. His cock started pulsing as he shot his cum down your throat. You swallowed every drop, and when he finally pulled out of your mouth, he looked at you in satisfaction. His dick stayed hard, and still in your face, and you kissed it, causing him to wince a little with overstimulation.

You lifted your head and met his eyes again. Lust laced his features, and you knew you had only a few minutes to catch your breath before he started again.

Yeosang gave you a small smile and pulled away from you. He leaned down, kissing you, and tasing his release still on your lips.

The smile turned into a smirk. “On the bed.”

You listened, scrambling up onto the bed. Yeosang watched with mild amusement as you were so eager to listen now, compared to an hour ago.

“Look at you Kitten. I haven’t touched you, yet you’re already soaked? You’re such a dirty little attention whore, aren’t you?” He asked, maneuvering himself down to be eye level with your cunt. He blew on your core, knowing you were sensitive. “Is my attention not enough for you?” He threw your legs over his shoulders as he looked at you. Every time he exhaled, you felt the air hit your pussy, and you groaned.

He gave your pussy small kitten licks as you whined, gripping his hair and trying to push his head more forcefully against you. He resisted, and finally grabbed your wrists, holding them down at your sides. “Answer me.”

“N-no Sir.” He licked a strip down your pussy as a reward, enjoying your sweet taste.

Your legs quivered as he licked another stripe. “Yeosang please” you begged.

“Who?” he pressed his face against your thighs and alternated between kissing and nibbling at your skin.

“Sir. Sir, please.”

“Good girl,’ he cooed. He planted wet kisses up the inside of your thigh, slowly making his way back up to your soaked core. You whined and moaned, begging for him to stop teasing you, which made him just repeat on your other leg.

“Sir please. I want to cum too” you begged him. You couldn’t take his teasing much more.

He laughed quietly. “You think I’d make it easy for you? After you disobeyed me?”

“Yes. Please. I promise I’ll be good.”

“I know full well you won’t. You’re a slut who loves the attention that you get. You love how much it bothers me. You like being bad.” As he said this, he slowly crawled his way up your body, his skin sliding against yours. He stopped when he was face to face with you, his cock settled at your entrance. You thought about moving around, just enough to get some of the friction you were craving, but didn’t. You knew he would pull away if you did.

“Do you want to know how I know that?” He leaned down, whispering the next part in your ear. “Because you love it when I punish you.”

With that, he roughly shoved himself into you, and you both moaned in ecstasy. The friction of his cock as he slammed into you making you close your eyes.

“Open your eyes slut” Yeosang demanded.

You popped your eyes open, and stared into his.

“Good. I want you to look at me while I fuck you silly. Make you remember that you belong to me, and no one else.”

You clenched around him at his words, making him grunt in your ear.

“Such a dirty fucking slut. You are mine.” He pressed hot kisses against your neck, making you moan and pant even more with need.

Your hands went up to grip his back, his muscles rippling as he thrusted in and out of you. Your nails dug into his skin, leaving little crescent marks. Your orgasm approached, pooling I’m your stomach as Yeosang relentlessly slammed into you, hitting that sweet spot inside of you.

He hissed in your ear as you dug into his back. “Let go,” he hissed and pulled out of you.

You whined at the loss of friction, and he smirked. “You wanna be good for me, don’t you?”

You nodded eagerly. The loss of the knot in your stomach making you feel even more needy for him.

“Move to the middle of the bed. On your knees. Better be fast. I have little patience for you right now.”

You quickly did as told, your back to Yeosang. You felt the bed dip underneath his weight as he climbed onto it.

Yeosang took both your arms and locked them behind your back, one hand clamped around your wrists, and the other hand going to your throat. He pressed his chest against your back and you felt him move by your ear. He said nothing, deciding to let your imagination wonder as he started nibbling and sucking on your neck.

“You’re doing so well for me. Think you can last a little longer?” He whispered in your ear, and nibbled it lightly.

You moaned out your response, tired of his teasing. You squirmed around a bit, trying to get some kind of stimulation again.

He chuckled, the hand at your throat applying the perfect amount of pressure that made you see stars.

His cock was at your entrance again, his hips moving ever so slowly to rub his tip against your sensitive folds. You let out a breathy moan of desperation, needing him inside of you.

“You want me inside Kitten?” He teased in your ear. His hand on your throat making it hard for you to nod your head or make a noise. Your eyes watering in desperation.

You couldn’t see him, but you could hear the smirk in his voice. “I’m going to take your silence as a yes.” He slowly trusted his hips up, sinking himself inside of you again. He groaned as the lewd noise filled the room. Your pussy clenched around him again, causing him to hiss. “If you keep doing that, I’m not going to last long. And you want to come, don’t you?”

You moaned again. The feeling of him sliding against your walls slowly driving you crazy. You needed him to fuck you dumb.

You started rocking your hips against him, needing the hardness and speed you so desperately need. His hand came off your neck and slapped your swollen clit. You choked on a moan, the shock of him hitting you sending a shiver of pleasure up your spine.

“You like that, don’t you, Kitten?”

“God. Yes. So much.”

“Good. I won’t do it again.” His hand went back to your throat, and the movement of his hips quickened, thrusting in and out of you at a neck breaking pace.

“Fuck, you feel so good around my cock,” Yeosang groaned in your ear. The heat of your release pooled in your stomach again. Your walls clenched around him even more, until your orgasm washed over you. Tears spilled from your eyes as you whimpered, finally being able to orgasm.

Your cunt milked Yeosangs cock until he sprayed your walls with his seed, mixing both of your juices inside of you. He groaned, his second orgasm doing him in and making him sigh. He rested his chin on your shoulder as you both caught your breath.

“You did so good for me, Kitten.” He kissed your forehead and wiped some of your hair out of your face. “But you know,” he whispered. “Next time I won’t go so easy on you.” He pulled out of you, his cum sliding out of you and down your thighs. “Maybe next time I’ll let you cum more than once.”

You smiled and turned in his arms to look at him. “I’ll make sure to be extra bad for you then Sir.” You pressed a small kiss to his lips.

He laughed at you. “I would expect nothing less. Now. Come here.” He wrapped his arms around you, all of his anger at you gone, and fell onto the bed. You on top of him, and your legs tangled together.

“I love you Kitten,” he said, placing a kiss to the top of your head.

You smiled up at him. “I love you too Yeosang.”

#ateez #ateez fic #ateez smut #yeosang smut #yeosang #kang yeosang #yeosang x y/n #yeosang x reader #yeosang x you #ateez fanfic #ateez oneshot #dom!yeosang #sub!reader #kpopfic #kpop boys #kpop smut #ateez imagines #kpop scenarios #yeosang scenarios #yeosang imagines #yeosang fanfic #100 notes #200 notes

[lettersfromaphrodite]

| I feel danger on your lips but it tastes good |

― pairing : Mingyu x Wonwoo ― content warnings : fluff, smut, vampire au, mingyu feeds from wonwoo ― word count : 4.976 ― summary : «don’t venture so far from your room at night,» Mingyu spoke with an alluring smile, «you’ll never know what lurks in the dark.»

― notes : this fic looks familiar?it is! I’m reposting ALL my works on this brand new blog and therefore please, bear with me! as always, askbox is always open and feedbacks are always welcome 💌

The flames seemed to be alive, burning so bright that it seemed like the sun was rising extremely early that day; the orphanage was completely engulfed by a fire that sadly, no one managed to extinguish before noon.

Wonwoo woke up with a startle, breathing heavily as he did that same night years ago, as he did what he could to help saving few of the children still trapped in the building.

"Well, good morning”, he thought, as he reached for his glasses on the nightstand, and eventually decided to get up and get ready for the day. Wonwoo was twenty-two now, and he resigned himself that he wouldn’t be as lucky as the other adopted children; however, his life seemed to had taken a decisive turn since the day he started working at the very expensive mansion where a very young Count Kim Mingyu was living.

That morning, Wonwoo had had waited for few minutes before the heavy front door of the mansion moved, and few seconds later a woman was peeking her head from behind it.

«Hello,» Wonwoo greeted with the hint of a curt bow, «I’m here for the-»

«The butler position!» the woman excitedly interrupted him, now almost standing in front of him; Wonwoo nodded, and she answered with a gentle smile, fidgeting her hands in the white apron falling from her waist.

«I’m Ljudmila, the head maid.» she offered, making enough space for Wonwoo to get inside the mansion. He briefly introduced himself, and when she told him that she would explain his duties so that he could start the following day, he questioned whether someone else had applied for the position.

«No,» Ljudmila shook her head, not looking at him; her frown seemed to deepen, and with it – Wonwoo noticed, so did the wrinkles on her forehead and around her eyes. «I believe you didn’t hear about rumours on your way here, or anything suspicious?» Wonwoo shook his head, and the frown disappeared from Ljudmila’s features.

«You can walk into every room in this castle, except of course for the ones you will find locked. The Master’s room are in the east wing of the mansion, but you don’t need to meet him for the time being.» Ljudmila’s voice was authoritative yet kind – it was obvious that she had been doing this for many years as she explained in details what would have been Wonwoo’s duties at the mansion; needless to say, he was so happy to hear that he would have his personal room that he almost forgot to listen to the rest.

Ljudmila, however, quickly noticed that Wonwoo rarely spoke and brushed it off thinking that he must have been very reserved, something quickly denied from the letters that accompanied him. Apparently the poor boy was one of the youngsters living in the orphanage that caught fire few years earlier.

The days went by quite slowly and monotonously, something that Wonwoo definitely didn’t dislike. Most importantly, Ljudmila must have said something to the other maids because – despite everyone being friendly to him, no one actually pushed too much for a conversation. Needless to say, Wonwoo was incredibly thankful to Ljudmila.

Among the things Wonwoo definitely wasn’t going to forget was his second day on the job, since everyone was almost incredulous about him being still alive, for whatever reason.

«Good heavens!» the cook had welcomed him in the kitchen that morning, «now this is something unexpected!» he laughed his thunderous laughter echoing in the room.

«What do you mean?» Wonwoo asked, his eyebrows furrowed in doubt. Did he sleep too much? No, that couldn’t be, the sun had just risen in the sky and yet there he was, washed up and dressed up for the day.

«It’s not a good idea…» one of the maids unsurely voiced her thoughts, however, Ljudmila almost appeared out of nowhere.

«Everyone, cut it out!» she quickly and nervously walked around the kitchen, faintly hitting both the cook and the maid that spoke with a the edge damp rag, without actually hurting them, «the poor boy has just arrived, are you – think about my sanity! I’ll grow older of twenty years in three days if you keep this up.» she sat on a nearby chair, breathing an exhausted sigh before smiling kindly at Wonwoo, who was silently looking at that bizarre interaction.

It was clear to Wonwoo that there was something up with this mansion – or even the Master himself; however, Wonwoo was definitely more determined that any danger lurking around.   After all, he needed the job, didn’t he?

During the few months Wonwoo had started working as a butler, he definitely managed to make a lot of good memories, but honestly, the only things permanently engraved in Wonwoo’s mind were his encounters with his Master.

The first time it happened, Wonwoo had woken up from a nightmare and after tossing and turning in his bed without managing to fall asleep again, he decided to take a silent stroll around the garden; however, the moment he reached the path sided with roses in bloom, his feet came to an abrupt stop.

There was someone standing in the middle of the garden and right next to the fountain, his back was turned and therefore he couldn’t see that Wonwoo was there. Judging by what he could see from the distance, the boy was probably Mingyu himself, Wonwoo thought, since he stood perfectly straight and his hair seemed to be as dark as a starless night.

It was like one of t he fairy tales Wonwoo had read in the orphanage; the stranger turned his head a little, and time seemed to stop. Less than a second later, Wonwoo found himself walking away, his heart hammering in his chest for whatever reason; his feet carried him back to his room, where he locked himself in just to lie on his back, his hands firmly placed above his heart in the vain attempt to calm down as he was blankly staring at the ceiling and waiting for the morning to come.

The second time, Wonwoo was silently heading back towards his room, probably a little later than usual since he couldn’t help but rearrange the whole library in both chronological and alphabetical order, when he heard confident steps echoing in the hallway, coming from the opposite direction.

It was dark outside, and the butler was wandering a little too close to the east wing of the mansion, he realised – however, a little too late. Wonwoo heard the faint clatter of shoes hitting against the perfectly clean marble floor slowly but steadily approaching, and instinctively froze in his steps; he quickly glanced around, noticing that it was definitely too late to hide.

A tall figure appeared at the end of the corridor, and Wonwoo quickly realized that it must have been his Master, the same person he saw in the garden; the more he approached him, the more Wonwoo swore he could feel his heart quicken his pace.

Master Kim was a gorgeous young man, Wonwoo thought, it was clear to him, even if the only source of light was the moonlight shining outside of the large windows that lined the hallway; he was tall, his body seemed to be well proportioned and his skin seemed to be the same colour as honey.

However, Wonwoo thought, his mind must have been playing tricks on him because he could swear that his Master’s eyes seemed to be a deep yet bright shade of red.

«We finally meet, …» Mingyu purposely faked to be oblivious to the youngster’s name.

«Wonwoo, Sir.» the boy answered, his eyes now staring at the marble floor, since he felt incredibly small under the other’s authoritative gaze.

«I hope you managed to find yourself at home here, however, don’t venture so far from your room at night,» Mingyu spoke with an alluring smile, «you’ll never know what lurks in the dark.»

Wonwoo felt his cheeks heathen as he apologized to him, and once again, he quickly walked towards his room, once again with his heartbeat hammering in his chest so loudly that Wonwoo was afraid his ribcage was going to explode from the intensity of it.

The menacing and mysterious aura around his Master disappeared a week later, as soon as Ljudmila asked Wonwoo to bring Mingyu his breakfast.

«Knock on his bedroom door three times, he’ll let you in,» she instructed, «don’t open the curtains, he’s got a terrible temper in the morning if he hasn’t fed – oh please, don’t tell him I said that. Place the tray on the mahogany desk in the middle of the room and then wait for him to dismiss you. Okay?» Wonwoo nodded immediately, picking up the tray filled with fruits, warm milk and a crystal vial filled with a reddish liquid that definitely didn’t look normal – or edible, at all.

«Are you sure that was a good idea? The boy doesn’t know that he’s working for a vampire.» the cook – already busy cutting a large amount of carrots for lunch, asked his long time friend and colleague.

«I’m getting old,» she answered, sitting on the chair in front of him, and starting to help him in his task, «this year I will be fifty four, and believe me, I want our Master to have someone reliable at his side.»

«You could have warned him, though.» was the only thing he answered.

«Don’t you remember how each one of us eventually found out? We both seen Mingyu grow up, and I believe you know better than me that Wonwoo’s is in perfectly safe hands.» she explained, smiling fondly at the memories of an extremely young Mingyu, running through the kitchen and eagerly wanting to taste human food.  

The east wing was symmetrical and perfectly equal to the rest of the mansion, still, the feeling of being allowed to venture inside it for the first time was more than enough for his heart to pick up pace in anticipation.

Wonwoo knocked three times against his Master’s door, before hearing his faint order to come in, just like Ljudmila had said. The bedroom was huge and, surprisingly enough, the furniture seemed to be really minimalistic.

“Less for me to clean”, Wonwoo thought, as his eyes quickly scanned the room. A mahogany desk with a large velvet-covered chair stood in the centre of the room – behind which stood the door-window leading to the small terrace attached to the room; to his left, a small bookcase formed a corner between two walls while to his right, there was a wide canopy bed where he easily found the target of his task.

His Master was sprawled on the mattress, his clothes were half unbuttoned and the sheets looked like he had tossed and turned all night without getting a minute of sleep.

«My dearest Ljudmila, believe me, I will die soon if I don’t personally feed on a human.» Mingyu sighed, his eyes lost in the ceiling above him, as he ran his fingers through his hair with a distressed movement.

«Your- your Grace» Wonwoo cleared his voice, immediately capturing the other boy’s interest, who was watching at his every move as his life depended on it, «Ljudmila is busy, she sent me.»

Mingyu was quick to lift himself on his elbows, studying Wonwoo’s movements as the butler placed the tray on his desk; while he was there, he took advantage of the situation and quickly re-arranged the order of few papers, just to make a little more space for him, if he decided to eat.

As Wonwoo re-adjusted his glasses, he heard his Master sigh, «Fine, but you’ll have to feed me, bring the blood to me, please.»

Wonwoo stared both at the ample filled with the ominous coloured liquid and then at Mingyu; did he hear that right?

Mingyu, however, noticed the confusion in the other’s eyes and chuckled briefly, tilting his head, «I guess Ljud didn’t tell you anything.»

«About what-» Wonwoo abruptly cut his own sentence with a sigh; he run a hand through his hair, before eventually, he took off his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and index finger, «what was she supposed to tell me?»

«For a start, that the Master of this mansion is a vampire.» Mingyu answered with a confident smile, finding Wonwoo’s reaction a weird mixture between adorable and cute.

«You really want me to fall for that?» he questioned the boy who was still looking at him with a confident and mischievous smile.

«Fall for “that” as in, fall for me?» Mingyu teased as he decided to get up from the sea of sheet he was lying comfortably on top of; with few confident strides, he closed the space between himself and Wonwoo, now standing in front of him.

Without realizing, the butler instinctively took an imperceptible step back, but the desk was there to stop his short and useless attempt to keep a reasonable distance.

«First thing first, I know you noticed my eyes when we met,» Mingyu tilted his head down to meet Wonwoo’s gaze, who definitely couldn’t deny the fact that normal people didn’t have bright red eyes.

«Most importantly, now that we are so close,» Mingyu leaned towards the butler, who instinctively leaned back on the desk, his hands reaching behind himself in order not to fall, «I can’t help but notice that your blood smells delicious, Wonwoo.» Mingyu spoke with an alluring and husky voice, every trace of the lively and teasing Master from seconds ago seemed to have disappeared; Wonwoo’s heart started to quicken its pace, as he was having troubles identifying what he was feeling.

Actually, he was almost sure that among the mixture of confusion and astonishment he felt at the sudden revelation, he could also find a little bit of anticipation, especially when he was certain to have felt Mingyu’s teeth ever so sightly graze at the exposed skin on his neck that the collar of his shirt didn’t cover.

The intimate moment they shared ended shortly after, when Mingyu lifted his head, tilting it back so that their gaze would meet.

«Do you believe me now?» Mingyu questioned him with a smile, and as soon as Wonwoo’s gaze fell to the two pointy fangs that were oh so visible in his Master’s dazzling smile, he eventually came to the conclusion that his words were true.

Actually, thanks to the other servants, he had always known that something was up with the mansion, he was just glad that it didn’t turn out to be haunted with ghosts.

Satisfied with the butler’s answer, Mingyu went back to his bed, and Wonwoo quickly recomposed himself.

«Should I get an empty cup of tea or-» Wonwoo nervously adjusted his glasses, which were about to fall off the bridge of his nose.

«You were really going to obey that silly order?» the vampire stared at him with wide eyes; Wonwoo nodded, and with a lively laugh, Mingyu fell back in the sea of white sheets.

From that day, much to Ljudmila’s happiness, Wonwoo became Mingyu’s personal butler.

Few weeks later, Wonwoo knocked against Mingyu’s bedroom door, scoffing while hiding an amused smile as the only answer the vampire decided to give him was a groan.

«Good morning, Your Grace.» Wonwoo politely greeted Mingyu, who was lying in the usual sea of sheets he loved, with his pillow tightly pressed against his head.

Now, Wonwoo had spent enough days at the vampire’s side to realize that something in his behaviour definitely was off; he quietly placed the tray of breakfast on the desk, before quietly approaching the bed.

«Is everything okay?» Wonwoo gently questioned, reaching out to touch Mingyu’s hand over the pillow, but eventually halting his movements; the vampire kept silent, and the butler crouched next to his bed, finding it impolite to sit on his sheets.

«You can sit here.» Mingyu mumbled few seconds later, gently patting the empty spot next to his waist; Wonwoo thanked him and complied.

No one spoke for few minutes, and the both of them fell into a comfortable and weirdly intimate silence; Mingyu didn’t move his hand from the mattress, and Wonwoo didn’t realize that their fingertips were almost touching.

«I simply have a headache, you can go if you want to.» the vampire’s hoarse voice broke the silence, but somehow, Wonwoo believed that he wasn’t telling the whole truth.

«I’m your personal butler, meaning I don’t have much to do if you’re sleeping.» Wonwoo lied. He definitely had something to do in the morning: collect mail from the entrance hall and sort it in order of importance before bringing it back to Mingyu – who most importantly had requested Wonwoo to drop formalities when they were alone. Then he needed to collect his freshly washed clothes from the laundry room, and then he promised Ljudmila he would help her clean the crystal chandelier in the living rooms, not to mention -

«I get very bad headaches and really dizzy if I don’t drink human blood.» Mingyu confessed,  his pinky finger unconsciously touching Wonwoo’s index finger.

«Haven’t you been drinking blood every day, though?» Wonwoo curiously questioned, barely moving his hand, so that their fingers touching wouldn’t be as casual as it was few moments ago. Mingyu groaned, and that was the only answer Wonwoo thought he’d get; eventually, the vampire sighed, lifting the cushion from his head, his gaze adjusting to the partial brightness in the room.

«You’re perceptive, little one,» Mingyu teased, «however, that’s animal blood – which for being clear, is definitely not the same.» Wonwoo hummed, as he seemed to be lost in thoughts for few seconds, he asked the vampire if there was anything he could do, but Mingyu simply sighed, shaking his head.

«I appreciate your concern, but unless you want me to feed from you, there’s nothing you can do.»

A whirlwind of thoughts seemed to float inside Wonwoo’s mind after he heard Mingyu’s magic words. Of course, he thought the vampire was insanely attractive and of course, he found himself more than once fantasizing about the possibility of kissing those full lips; moreover, he had to admit that the fact that Mingyu was both extremely clumsy and effortlessly funny was enough for him to get fond of t he vampire every day a little more.

Actually, his blooming feelings were completely reciprocated by the vampire, but nor him nor Mingyu had ever considered the possibility, and therefore, when Wonwoo spoke a faint «okay, let’s do it.», Mingyu thought he was hallucinating.

«I’m not undressing more than this,» Wonwoo clarified, as he stared at the vampire, lazily sitting on the bed; the butler was basically still completely dressed, with the only exception of his gloves and his jacket. His shirt was completely unbuttoned, and thanks to the partial darkness of the room, he didn’t notice how Mingyu’s gaze hungrily travelled on the glimpse of toned skin that he could see.

«Works for me, but if things get messy I’m gonna stain your shirt, and you’ll have to tell Ljud.» Mingyu shrugged, a breathless chuckle escaping his lips as he heard Wonwoo groan in agreement, since he didn’t want to feel Ljudmila’s beloved damp rag on his skin anytime soon, especially for something he didn’t do.

Wonwoo lowered the suspenders keeping the shirt in place, letting the pieces of fabric dangle from his belt loop; he quickly got rid of his shirt, before folding it and placing it next to his jacket.

Following Mingyu’s direction, Wonwoo climbed on the mattress, and awkwardly sat on his lap; the vampire was keeping his left hand behind himself for balance, while his right hand immediately reached out to gently hold the other boy’s slim waist.

«This should be the part where you relax.» Mingyu mumbled, as his hand hesitantly slid from Wonwoo’s waist to his thigh. He tentatively widened the palm of his hand, just to squeeze the skin ever so lightly; needless to say, he found Wonwoo’s sudden whimper an addictive sound.

«If I do, we’ll be touching touching.» Wonwoo answered, hesitantly; despite his embarrassment, he didn’t want to move away, and as he felt Mingyu guide his hands to his chest, he let him, relaxing a little bit further against the other.

«I’m about to drink your blood, so it works for me,» the vampire shrugged, hiding behind a nervous smile, «are you sure you’re okay with this?»

Wonwoo didn’t need time to think about it before answering that yes, of course he was; a faint tug at his left thigh was what made him spread his knees a little more, completely sitting on Mingyu’s lap.

Now, clearly the both of them noticed that the other one was half hard but still – thankfully, no one decided to mention it. Mingyu’s lips immediately found Wonwoo’s collarbone, trying to focus his mind on his task of feeding before he decided to succumb to the lust and the attraction he felt for the younger boy.

«It- It tickles.» Wonwoo whispered, his shoulder instinctively twitching, making Mingyu move the direction of his open mouthed kisses a little upwards. If he were to be honest, that amount of kisses definitely was not necessary, but still, Mingyu didn’t exactly know why he was paying so much attention to it; whether it was because he wanted Wonwoo to fully get comfortable in his presence, whether he was loving the feeling of the other boy tightly gripping his shirt while trying to hide needy whimpers, Mingyu thought he would gladly stop time in that moment, so that they could enjoy it a little bit longer. Mingyu felt Wonwoo giggle again, and he breathed a little exasperated giggle as he leaned back once again.

«I’m sorry, it really tickles a lot.» Wonwoo apologized, and the both of them ended up finding that situation incredibly surreal to the point where they were thrown into a fit of small giggles.

«I’m good now, I promise.» Wonwoo took a deep breath as the both of them seemed to have calmed down; his hands found once again their place against the vampire’s chest – tightly gripping Mingyu’s shirt.

Wonwoo didn’t know what to expect, since the only time he had heard about vampires were in fairy tales; was their bite supposed to hurt, was it supposed to bring him a weird kind of pleasure?

Whatever the butler was trying to prepare for, he definitely didn’t consider the fact that Mingyu decided to place his hand on his nape, just to connect their lips; Wonwoo immediately reciprocated in a clumsy and passionate gesture, and he believed he could feel the butterflies in his stomach do somersaults as soon as he felt Mingyu groan against his lips as soon as he faintly tugged on his hair. They ended up kissing passionately until their lips felt swollen, and as they were both panting to catch their breath, Wonwoo gently guided Mingyu’s head to his neck.

It was crazy how a simple gesture was about to make him come untouched, but Wonwoo thought that nothing could have prepared him for the feeling of Mingyu sucking on his blood; it was weird, he had to admit, but at the same time, Wonwoo felt like his blood was being turned into a molten core gently spreading through his body. His senses felt heightened in an almost inhuman way, and the feeling of Mingyu’s arms gently but firmly holding his body close were driving him to hypersensitivity; whatever was happening, Wonwoo definitely didn’t want for it to end.

«Are you sure you feel better?» Wonwoo questioned, watching Mingyu nod as he wiped the small amount of blood falling from the corner of his lips.

«I know it’s really not romantic and I kind of planned to do things a little differently, but I really like you,» Mingyu confessed out of the blue, his gaze searching for Wonwoo’s as he felt him instinctively tense up in his lap, «and I really want you,» he added, moving his gaze towards the other’s lips, «heavens, how I want you.» he mumbled again, the huskiness and arousal in his voice were enough to drive Wonwoo’s mad.

The butler studied the vampire for few seconds, but still, he found no trace of lie in his gaze, especially because he has proven more than once that he didn’t have a single reason to lie to him. Wonwoo relaxed once again, his arms snaking around the vampire’s neck. «I really like you too,» he mumbled against Mingyu’s lips, feeling them part as if they were magnets, «and I really want you too.» That morning, Mingyu and Wonwoo ended up making love for the first time, showering each other with the eager affection of a blooming love, as their fingertips remained tightly intertwined.

For the whole day, no one among the servants asked where the Master and Wonwoo were; if the reason was Ljudmila threatening to kill everyone who suggested to look for them, that’s something neither Mingyu or Wonwoo needed to know.

Few weeks later, far too early on a Sunday morning, Mingyu groaned, turning the other way as he tried to fall asleep again. He stretched out his arm, realizing that Wonwoo must have woken up already; with an annoyed sigh, he silently cursed his servants for being so loud in the morning for no reason at all.

Eventually, Mingyu ended up shifting on Wonwoo’s side of the bed, trying to enjoy what was left of his lover’s warmth, but the noise didn’t seem to stop anytime soon; the vampire crooked one eye open, just snort while trying to hide an amused laughter – of course, Wonwoo hushed him immediately with a quick gesture of his hand.

«I told you, that I don’t want us to get married, not yet!» one of the maid’s loud voice echoed from the courtyard. Wonwoo was hiding behind the heavy curtain, following the interaction with extreme interest while carefully avoiding for too much light to peek into Mingyu’s room; he knew that light didn’t affect his lover, but he also knew that his temper wouldn’t be great if he were to be woken up with too much sunlight peeking inside the bedroom.

«But why not? Is it because of your parents? You didn’t tell them you’re pregnant, did you?» the gardener immediately retorted, his voice filled with irritation and astonishment. Wonwoo did his best to hide his surprised gasp, the tray –  on which Mingyu’s dressed for the day were neatly placed, now digging a little more in his waist.

«I knew it!» Wonwoo faintly mumbled to himself while bringing his free hand in front of his mouth – still unaware about the fact that Mingyu was awake, and therefore earning another amused giggle from the vampire.

The argument between the couple went on for minutes, and Wonwoo was too immersed in his activity that he definitely didn’t notice Mingyu eventually walking up and walking towards him.

«What’s the commotion?» Mingyu’s hoarse voice spoke right against Wonwoo’s ear as he hugged his waist from behind, and the butler almost had a heart attack on the spot.

«Shh!» Wonwoo quickly silenced him, ignoring the fact that on that moment, he was definitely being louder than his lover. «One of the maids is pregnant, the gardener asked for her hand in marriage.» Wonwoo briefly explained. Mingyu gave him a brief nod, yawning and scratching his chest; he absently took the tray from Wonwoo’s hands – who immediately let him, and right after he placed it on his desk.

The next few minutes looked something in between from ridiculous to adorable; Mingyu, a vampire, was peeking from behind the curtain and repeating whatever Wonwoo’s ears couldn’t hear while Wonwoo, his butler, was mirroring his actions while moving his right hand as if to urge him to tell him more because «I didn’t hear it! Oh, damn that gardener’s thick accent.»

Mingyu yawned again, kissing his lover’s shoulders three times before eventually walking to the side of the door-window in order to open the curtains; Mingyu took the other’s hand – and of course Wonwoo let him lead them to the small balcony.

«I thought we were eavesdropping in a discreet way.» the butler mumbled with a small pout, not enjoying the fact that his fan had been cut short; however, now that the couple was on the balcony, Wonwoo definitely noticed that a large part of the servants had gathered in the courtyard as well, everyone suddenly interested and invested about the issue.

For a second, Wonwoo’s gaze met Ljudmila’s exasperated one, and as she shook her head, he chuckled briefly.  

«Say, Wonwoo, what if we give them something to actually gossip about?» Mingyu’s alluring voice was once again speaking next to Wonwoo’s ear. The poor butler didn’t even have enough time to turn around and ask the vampire what he meant, when he found Mingyu’s lips gently crashing on his. Immediately, Wonwoo returned the gesture with equal fervour, as if it was the first time him and Mingyu were kissing and they haven’t been doing it on a daily basis for weeks.

Mingyu’s hands gripped Wonwoo’s waist, and pulled the younger boy flat against his chest; he didn’t need to check to be sure that the lovers quarrel had been already forgotten in order to talk about how «did you see the way young Master Mingyu was dragging Wonwoo to his bed?»

all works © lettersfromaphrodite

Do not modify, repost, translate or plagiarize my stories. I only publish my works on tumblr & AO3.

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#fanfics #seventeen fanfic #meanie fanfic #wonwoo x mingyu #mingyu x wonwoo #seventeen au #seventeen vampire au #svt fanfic #seventeen fic #seventeen scenarios #kpop fantasy au #kpop fanfic #kpop smut #kpopfic #fantasy au

[a-casual-kpopfan]

Looks Like Rain.

Previous Part: Behind The Scenes - Haseul

Next Part: ?

A/N: There will few spoilers and easter eggs here for all future fics as this really ends Jinsoul's first phase in the MoonVerse.

~~~~~~

Click

You turn on the light switch to your small apartment. It was a mess, old take-out containers, glass bottles of alcohol on the counter next to the sink. You lock your front door, slipping out of your shoes and bringing a plastic bag with a few bottles of soju over to the table. Not even cleaning up, you pull a bottle out and open it to immediately sip from it.

You pull your phone out of your pocket as you take a seat at the table, seeing you have several missed calls from a certain Jo Haseul.

“Oppa, you got to talk to her.”

“She’s not talking to anyone. I really think she’s going crazy over this.”

“Oppa… She’s locked herself in her room, Sooyoung is trying keep her calm.”

These voicemails were all from a week ago. You were a wreck. Everything has come crashing down on you all in an instant. You requested a Leave of Absence from work, which was granted for 2 months.

You couldn’t bring yourself to stare her in the face.

Jeong Jinsol.

“I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOUR FACE!”

“LEAVE ME, DON’T EVER TOUCH ME AGAIN!

“GET OUT!”

You believed those were the last words you would ever hear from the woman you love, kicking you out of her life.

*Knock, Knock*

You sluggishly get up and walk over to your front door, opening it revealing a certain silver-haired leader of a 12-member group. She looked at you with a smile, while you felt disgusted and just drank another sip of the soju you have in hand.

You didn’t say a word but turned your back on Haseul and walked towards your living room, leaving Haseul free to enter the mess of an apartment. Haseul walks in and closes the door, going through the hallway and kicking around the trash that’s laying on the floor. “Ugh oppa, don’t you ever clean up?” Haseul starts picking up empty chip bags and cups of ramen off the floor.

You completely dismiss whatever she has said and just took another swig of the bottle of soju. Haseul then puts the trash into the big under the sink in the kitchen and walks over to the couch where your sad ass has taken refuge.

“Why are you here Jo?” You lay the back of your head on the couch, looking at her as tears start running down your face. “I miss her.” Haseul looks at you, taking the bottle out of your hand and placing it on the nearby table. “I miss her too Daewon.” Haseul places her other hand on top of yours.

“I regret not telling her.” Haseul’s voice is toned down much lower than ever, this of course is a hard time to be the leader of the group. “You know if you don’t talk to her before we leave, things will never go back to normal.” The leader sat down next to you, trying to comfort, and hopefully put some motivation to see her.

~~~~~

“WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS WITH HER?” Jinsol yells at you as she enters your apartment, as you are following behind her. “What do you mean babe?” You were growing irritated with how Jinsol is reacting. “Why are you always with Jiwoo.” Jinsol’s voice was lowered, she was not shouting. She was trying to stay calm in this situation, trying to keep herself composed.

“I’m not always with her, Sol. I’m with you almost every day.” You were growing annoyed being questioned by her. “Why can’t you tell me what’s going between the two of you. Jiwoo has been distance with us too, this isn’t a coincidence!” Jinsol is starting to get more suspicious by the moment.

“There’s nothing to tell you babe, I just happened to see Jiwoo.” You put your coat away on the coat rack, proceeding to pass Jinsol in the hall leading to the kitchen. “Can I trust you?” Without hesitation, you answered right away.

“You can trust me.”

~~~~~

“Have you spoken to her?” A voice over the phone asks you about Jinsol. “No… I don’t think I should get near the dorm anytime soon.” You tell this person, very sadly. “Do you want to get a drink tonight?”

You look at your window and see the sun setting down, indicating nightfall is coming. “Sure, I’ll come over.”

“Okay oppa, I’ll see you soon.”

You hang up the phone and got up from your couch, walking to your bedroom to open the closet. It’s hitting once again, everything felt so much emptier than before. It’s been a week, a week that Jinsol took all her things back. A week ago, when Jinsol swore she would never set foot in this apartment again.

You can say that your closet really represents what you feel like. Having lost someone so close, your lover, your best friend, but in the end, you had to do what you had to do. You shake your head to bring some sense to yourself. Trying to not think about the past, trying to not think about the way you lost her.

You put on a jacket, grabbing your wallet and keys on the way out. You receive a text holding details of the new address that you will be heading to.

As you leave your apartment, you look back inside. The lack of photo frames, the endless mess that’s taking up the space inside.

Empty.

Just like you.

~~~~~

You walk up to an apartment, knocking on the door while holding a bag of food and drinks with the other hand. “Who is it?” A familiar cheerful voice can be heard from the other size, you smile as you hear that her voice is still as happy as it could be.

“It’s me Jiwoo.” The door opens to a homey looking Jiwoo.

“You look settled.” Smiling slightly as you see Jiwoo taking the move to a different dorm well. “Come in oppa.” She moves out of the way, letting you in the new dorm. It’s more so a one-bedroom apartment, yet more roomy than your own apartment. Taking in the look of the dorm, there’s still many boxes that have yet to be unpacked.

“Did you call me over to unpack your things?” Looking back at the little peach, but to your surprise, she shook her head. “My assigned manager will come later in the week to help me. I think his name is In-Su?” You shrug and unpack the snacks and soju you brought over.

The two of you sitting at a table in the living room, taking a few shots each and eating little snacks such as chips and roasted nuts. “How’s the new company?” You curiously ask Jiwoo wondering about her wellbeing. “It’s nice, I guess you can say that you’ve been in one agency, you’ve been in all of them. But the CEO… Ree Yong… Kind of a stickler, so into his business.”

Jiwoo continues telling you about the new agency she joined since her relationship with BBC started falling out. “How are you feeling about leaving?” Jiwoo shrugs and leans back a little. “I want to look out for myself, and I’m not leaving the group, it was just a contract dispute.” You shrugged as well as she’s technically not the only one who left.

“How about you oppa?” Jiwoo pours herself another shot of soju, also pouring you one as well. You can hear from the tone of voice that she understands what you’ve been through. “Is unnie still mad?” You just sat there smiling somberly, Jiwoo knew everything that had happened.

The only reason why you had spent so much time with Jiwoo, not telling Jinsol anything was because you were sworn the confidentiality by the new agency she was moving to. Jiwoo asked of you to help her with the move but to keep it a secret from the group until it happens.

“Haseul visited me at my apartment this morning. It doesn’t sound like she’s having any luck with Jinsol either.” Jiwoo can’t do anything other than pout and raise her glass with you. Picking up your glass, you clinked it off Jiwoo’s before the two of you take the shot down.

Meanwhile…

“Unnie, it’s time to eat.” Yerim knocks on the door, opening it to see her unnie, Jinsol still concealed in her bed. “Okay Yerim… I’ll come down later.” Jinsol’s voice sounds broken, a piece of her is missing, you were missing. “Come down soon unnie, you need to eat to be healthy.” Yerim then closes the door and leaves.

Following quickly after, the door quickly opens, causing Jinsol shoot up from laying down. “I said I’ll be-” “Unnie, can we talk?” A tired looking Haseul is confronting the one equally tired Jinsol. “Can I sit?” Jinsol is confused but nods, letting her group leader sit on the bed with her. “Haseul, I-”

Haseul shakes her head and raises her hand. “Just listen to me right now.” Jinsol just stayed silent and stared at Haseul. “Do you know how much of a mess he is right now?” Haseul smiled a little while holding onto Jinsol’s hand. “Well, I can tell you, that the apartment misses you too.” Jinsol snickers a little knowing her ex partner is a real mess.

“Unnie, maybe you should find everything out and talk?” Jinsol looked up to her leader because of course she must be right… Again. Jinsol knew that she had to get some kind of closure, or at least speak to you properly this time.

“I need to talk to him.” Haseul nodded and promptly left the room, leaving Jinsol to do what she needs to do. As expected, Jinsol got out of bed and got dressed. Without a thought in her mind, she leaves with barely presentable sweats, no makeup, only grabbing her bag and jacket.

Sooyoung who happens to be in the living room with her significant other Gungjeun just watches the blonde run down the stairs and immediately out the door. “What was that about?” Gungjeun asks while he and Sooyoung are snacking on chips on the couch. “Bet you a cup of ice cream that it’s Daewon related.” Sooyoung immediately counters with a bet.

“Why do you only make bets when you know you’re going to win.” Gungjeun questions, with Sooyoung give him a pretty smile and tells him happily. “Because nothing will be in between me and my snacks.” Sooyoung says confidently.

~~~~~

Jinsol arrives at your apartment, getting out of an uber. Jinsol was scrambling, feeling flustered, she’s insanely confused of her actions but not as confused of her feelings. She doesn’t know why she’s there, why she’s there to see you. Is to get back together? Is it to clarify why it’s best to break up?

Jinsol breathing heavily, thinking about the last time she was in your apartment.

*Drip*

Jinsol looks up to the sky, it’s starting to get dark. “It really had to rain out of all days?” Jinsol ran towards the apartment, Haseul would totally scold her for not being sensible to bring an umbrella. After taking a deep breath Jinsol enters the lobby still having an extra key you gave her months ago.

In a matter of moments, she’s in front of your door. Jinsol gently knocks on the door still feeling like she should respect your privacy even though she still had your extra key with her. She patiently waits at your door, although one knock turned to another knock. One minute turned to two minutes.

Jinsol knew you would have answered by now, slowly losing all her patience she opened the door with your spare key. “Daewon?” Jinsol called out your name, peeking inside she notices that your shoes aren’t here. “He’s not home?” Jinsol looked around the apartment and damn, it really was a mess.

Jinsol smiles as she remembers all the time that you and she spent, you’ve been in this apartment for years but today, it felt like you’re visiting for the very first time. “I guess I should do something while I wait.” Jinsol tells herself as she takes her shoes off and starts picking up trash all over the floor.

~~~~~

Jinsol has swept the floor, cleaned up around the living room. “Already looking better.” Now Jinsol gazes at her work, keys can be heard from the front door. The door swings open to you and Jiwoo wet from the rain, as she is holding your arm.

“J-Jinsol?” “Oh, unnie when did you get here?”

Jinsol was in shock, you, and Jiwoo? Did it really happen? Two weeks and you were already with someone… You were with Jiwoo. “Jinsol?” Her name, her real name. No more babe, no more Soulie and no more JinJin.

Just Jeong Jinsol.

“Uh… I was just here to…” Jinsol was flustered, she couldn’t think properly. She stared at Jiwoo’s hand around your arm, Jiwoo noticed right away and immediately let’s go of your arm and looked down. “I’m here to return your key.” Jinsol takes the key off her chain and leaves it on the table.

“Wait, Jinsol.” You tried to call her name, but Jinsol rushed out the door, her eyes starting to shine like she’s trying to hold in the tears. “Jiwoo.” Jinsol didn’t bother looking up to Jiwoo. The tone wasn’t cold but more so giving up. Jinsol ran out the door, the tears have come out, the dam has come down.

“Jinsol!” You chased her down the hallway, she reached the elevator, the doors closing before you can call the elevator open. You look back and forth trying to find a way to find her. The end of the hallway, you find the emergency stairs rushing towards them.

Jinsol leaning back on the wall of the elevator, looking up to the ceiling, tears coming down her face. Regretting coming to see you, it should have ended that day when Jinsol left, there was no chance to reconcile and fix things.

You and Jiwoo.

Jinsol should have seen that coming.

The elevator finally makes it to the lobby, the doors open and the tearful blonde inside slowly walks out.  “How could I have been so dumb…” Jinsol couldn’t stop thinking about it, you and Jiwoo being together. The rain is coming down hard although Jinsol didn’t care. She was determined to leave as soon as possible.

“JINSOL!”

Jinsol turns around to see you chasing after her, you didn’t think twice about running through the rain to see the one you care about. “Jinsol, why did you leave?” This new look of concern on your face is noticed by Jinsol, of course knowing you for so many years. “What do you want?!” Jinsol yelled back at you.

“Why did you come?” You searched for answer, she hasn’t seen you in weeks and this is what happens when you two see each other again? “I saw the way she held your arm.” Jinsol looked you in the ear, her red tearful eyes, a look you never seen before. “The way you two were laughing.” You were confused, what did she mean? “How come you couldn’t be there for me like you are for her?” Were you not there for her all the time? You begin to question yourself, when was the last time the two of you went out for a date? When was the last time you had time off from work?

“You were always my priority!” You tried to counter, only wanted to be with Jinsol but work and other things got in the way. “Then why can’t you tell me what’s going on with you and Jiwoo?!” You were quiet, you couldn’t respond to her. “You can’t even answer me that.” With that, Jinsol signalled to a cab that was conveniently come up the street.

“I don’t want to see you ever again.” Jinsol opens the door to the cab seats, and shortly the car drives off before you could react. You were left in the rain, you don’t know what you could have done, what you could have answered. “I should have just told her what happened, whether you were allowed to or not.”

“Oppa!”

You turn around to Jiwoo running with a large umbrella in hand. “You pabo! You could get sick!” Those were the exact same words Jinsol said to you the night you two got together, the night two of you shared your first kiss, the night both of you finally confessed your love for each other.

At that moment it hit you, the tears came out and you couldn’t hold it in anymore. You fell on your knees, Jiwoo panicked, threw the umbrella to the ground, and dropped down to you. She held you, she tried to comfort you, she stayed there for you.

~~~~~

“Are you ready for the article to drop?” The CEO of Jiwoo’s new company asks you and Jiwoo as you’re in an office of a small building in Seoul. “How do you think Orbits will take it Yong?” It’s been about a month since what happened, after that you solely focused on work with Jiwoo. “If the trend of Jiwoo’s popularity keeps rising, I don’t see how this can go poorly.”

Jiwoo seemed nervous, you were sitting next to her, and you grabbed her hand. “It’ll be okay Wooming.” Jiwoo looked at you and smiled, her nervousness went away, and all became well.

In a blink of an eye, the article drops.

“LOONA’s Chuu to leave BBC over lawsuit, opts to open a self owned company.”

“Oh my God, oh my God, it’s out!” Jiwoo jumps up as you, the CEO Ree Yong, and his assistant Byeon In-Su. “Ms. Kim, I must ask you to calm down, I believe this will be a successful campaign.” You just laugh at In-Su’s attempt to calm Jiwoo, the years you’ve known her, there’s no way to calm her down.

Jiwoo still staying panic mode, both Yong and In-Su watching as she’s in a panic, but you finally step in. “Jiwoo, shouldn’t you get ready for the opening celebration?” Jiwoo heard you quite clearly and stopped panicking, took a deep breath, and nodded. Yong nodded at you in thanks for calming the young peachy girl “In-Su please take Ms. Kim down dress and makeup.”

In-Su accepts and heads to the door to open for Jiwoo, before leaving she goes up to and gives you a hug. “I’ll see you at the party.” You hug her back and you nod. Both Jiwoo and In-Su leave, you sit down in a chair, sighing slightly.

“Daewon.” You look over at Yong who’s going through his laptop, over the last month you, Yong, In-Su, and Jiwoo have met quite a few times during the month, Yong even meeting a certain bunny we all know and love. “I need to let you know that the rest of the group will be attending the party.” Rather than telling you that they’re attending, Yong is warning you.

You look down, but back up with a small smile. “Well, it was bound to happen.” You knew you must face it eventually, especially working for Jiwoo instead of BBC now. “Is Heejin still pining?” You joke with Yong, he may have a cold and serious demeanour, but he is quite entertained with the shenanigans that have been going on the past month or so.

“Shouldn’t you prepare for tonight?” Yong reminds you as you notice he has a little smirk. “Should I be worried?” You knew something is up, it’s just the matter of what it is. “Here’s the seating plans.”

Table 1:

Heejin (Of course) – Yong – In-Su – Jiwoo – Daewon (You) – Jinsol – Yerim – Jung – Jungeun – Jae-Sun – Sooyoung – Gungjeun.

Table 2:

Hyunjin – Jin-Ho – Vivi – Haneul – Yeojin – Taesuk – Haseul – Min-Joon – Chaewon – Taeyang – Hyeju – Jiwu.

Your eyes widen, looking up towards Yong in shock. “Yong!” You yell in a panic, but Yong stays calm in his chair and shrugs. “You don’t need to show up you know.” The cold CEO casually says, it would be better if you didn’t attend although you can’t leave Jiwoo on her lonesome.

“Looks like I’m stuck.”

Meanwhile…

“Girls, table seating plan just came in!” Heejin calls out the girls while she’s sitting at her laptop, receiving an email from Yong… Well Yong’s business email. “Since when did you get group related emails ahead of Haseul?” Sooyoung walks in eating a pack of chocolate pocky. “Since I started annoying him with Jiwoo unnie.”

“Oh my God…” Both Heejin and Sooyoung stare at the open email and smirk at each other. “Tonight, is going to be fun unnie.” Heejin giggles while Sooyoung can only smirk while eating her pocky. “I think us being in the same table to watch up front is going to be a treat.” Sooyoung says as she snaps a pocky in half in her mouth.

~~~~~

“So, Jiwoo really did start up her own company.” Jinsol casually says as she’s scrolling through her phone in one of the cars taking the group to Jiwoo’s new company’s building. “Yeah, to think this all started with a lawsuit.” Haseul who is pleasantly surprised that Jiwoo was able to pull this feat.

“Are you okay with attending Sol?” Sooyoung sitting in the back with Gungjeun and Heejin, the only reason why Sooyoung is asking in the first place is because she knows for a fact that Ms. Blondie sitting up front has not seen the seating plan, otherwise she would not even bother with this event.

“Of course, Jiwoo is still my friend and one of our members!” Jinsol tries to reassure the members and member’s S/O that she’s 100% okay with being there, though Jinsol isn’t holding a grudge towards Jiwoo, but a sour taste was left in her mouth every time that Jinsol would think of Jiwoo.

“Of course, Sol, we’re all there to support her.” Min-Joon (Haseul’s partner) who’s driving the car, accepts what Jinsol says and believes that she’s telling the truth. Joon looks in his mirror with Jinsol in the refection, the two smile at each other.

~Flashback~

“Have you spoken to him at all?” Min-Joon whose friends with Daewon back in high school, asks their other companion of being in the chaotic lives of the moon girls, Gungjeun, Sooyoung’s partner. “I haven’t, that day Jinsol came back in the rain, it was scary.”

“I tried calling him, he didn’t pick up.” Joon is now in a panic for his childhood friend, he doesn’t show it on his face, but his actions do. Joon is standing in front of the window, staring into the sky. Haseul is worried for both Jinsol and Daewon, a member and a friend who’s worked with them since the beginning and all went to high school together.

“How do you think Jiwoo is doing?” Gungjeun asks out of curiosity, worried for the missing’s member’s wellbeing. “I don’t think Jiwoo is having a good time either.” Sooyoung frowns as she misses her best friend who isn’t in the dorm anymore.

“We just have to do our best to support Jinsol right now.” Joon says looking back at the table consisting of Haseul, Gungjeun and Sooyoung. As they all agree, nodding towards Min-Joon.

~Present Time~

“We’re about to start.” Daewon enters Jiwoo’s change room, knocking first and getting permission of course. Jiwoo looks in her large vanity mirror, with you in the reflection and smiles. “I’m nervous oppa.” You look into Jiwoo’s eyes through the mirror, and you can see the worry in her eyes.

“It’ll go well Jiwoo; you have nothing to worry about.” You walked up to Jiwoo and put your hand on her shoulder, she smiled and pulled up her hand and rested it on yours. She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath and looks up to you. “I hope so.”

*Knock knock*

“Ms. Jiwoo, it’s time to greet the guests.” Yong’s assistant In-Su is standing in the doorframe of the changeroom, you and Jiwoo look at each other and know that there’s no going back now. “Let’s go Ms. Kim?” You playfully put your hand out like you’re going to walk the Queen out to her horse drawn carriage. “Let’s go.” Jiwoo says softly taking your hand in the same action.

As you take Jiwoo out to In-Su, you head to the other direction heading to the main hall where the event is taking place. You pull up your phone to look at her contact.

JinJin <3

You never dared to change her name on your phone, but you thought about the last month.

Was there going to be another chance?

Can she forgive you for what happened?

Will she understand?

Does she still love you?

JinJin <3|

JinJin|

Jin|

Jinsol|

It pained you but you eventually had to do it.

~~~~~

“So, you are alive!” You and Gungjeun shares a little man hug, Joon as well shortly after. “I’m sorry for not picking up your calls or messaging, I was more or less preoccupied.” You look behind the boys to Jiwoo smiling and seeing the other Loona members. Although when looking in the direction of Jiwoo, Jinsol happens to pass by and awkwardly makes eye contact with you.

Your smile falls from a normal one to a hurt one, you friends notice this sudden change in vibe. “It’s okay, we just got to get through this night, and we can go along with our lives.” Joon puts his hand on your shoulder trying to comfort you.

But that’s the thing.

You don’t want to go back to a normal life, you want your chaotic life you had with Jinsol. The hugs and cuddles, the adventures you two had together since kids. A person you spent your whole life with and it’s over.

“Yeah, I guess so.” You just had to accept it. But you were extremely weary of what’s yet to come due to some… Unusual seating plans. “Let’s get seated? I believe us three are at the same table?” You try to change the subject as you dread the upcoming event. The boys agree and all sat down and caught up with each other.

Jiwoo and Jinsol has greeted each other but more so respect that they’re members in the same group, there was still a large amount of tension between the two and the rest of the members really feel it as well. “Is it me or does it feel like the place is much smaller than how it actually is?” Heejin quietly asks Sooyoung, who nods and agrees.

The night went on as it should, but the awkwardness is starting to rise high between Jinsol and Jiwoo. The greetings have ended, both Yong and Jiwoo take the stage of the auditorium in the building, everything is going fine and well… Other than the fact that you and Jinsol are sitting next to each other.

The table is silent, more so for the respect of Jiwoo and Yong going through the opening pleasantries with all the ones who attended.

Once when the opening announcements were over, both Yong and Jiwoo join your table while noticing the awkward tension around here. Servers have appeared and started serving guests their choice of chicken or beef, everyone getting their preferred orders until.

“Sorry ma’am I only have chicken left.” The server apologized to Jinsol as she requested for a beef dish, but it seems like the kitchen miss counted.

“Oh.”

You know that “Oh” that was a disappointed “Oh”, and of course Jinsol, didn’t want to make a big deal out of it and just accepted it. You can tell she was disappointed and felt lost, not knowing what to do.

You looked at your untouched plate and awkwardly tried to talk to Jinsol. “Hey.” Jinsol heard you, but decidedly ignoring you. “Hey.” Jinsol acknowledges that you’re trying to talk to her, but again ignoring you. You roll your eyes as you know Jinsol is giving you the silent treatment, you went ahead to grab her plate.

“Yah! What are you – Oh.” Jinsol watches you giving up your beef plate for her chicken. “Thanks.” Jinsol thanks you but doesn’t look at you, but you know she is thankful that you have done that, otherwise she’ll be complaining for the whole night. While on the other side of the table, Heejin and Sooyoung are watching everything that is happening between the two of you.

“You didn’t have to do that.” Jinsol resentfully said to you, it was uncalled for but hey, she initiated a conversation. “But it seems like you’re happier with that rather than with this.” Jinsol doesn’t want to admit she is happy with your actions. “Whatever.”

You: 1

Jinsol: 0

“At least I stay loyal to my first choice.”

Ouch.

You: 1

Jinsol: 1

You didn’t have a comeback for that, you sort of just sat there in silence eating. You looked around and saw some unfamiliar faces sitting with some members. “Did the other members meet some people?” Jinsol rolled her eyes but decided to continue with the conversation. “The one sitting next to Chaewon, the guy she’s fixing the tie for, that’s Taeyang. A part time arts director at the college, recently hired as a stylist.”

You nod along, you’ve been away from BBC for so long that you haven’t gotten familiar with the new hires. “And this is Jung oppa.” Yerim with her bright smile, shows her partner. “Hello!” Jung, equally as bubbly and bright as Yerim. “Yup, they’re definitely a couple.” You nod respectfully to greet Jung. “And you remember Haseul’s younger brother?” You begin to get more invested in this. “Yeah… Vivi unnie fell for a young guy.” That was little shock for you.

As the dinner went on, Jinsol and you continued talking, it’s gotten less and less awkward. Jinsol had caught you up with everything that’s happened with the members. “What about you… What’s new in life?” Jinsol oddly asks you.

“Well since the debut of the company, I don’t need to comply with an NDA that I signed… About 3 months ago.” You finally dropped the news to Jinsol that you couldn’t before, with the shocking reveal, Jinsol makes eye contact with you for the first time since… That night.

Nothing was said, you continued to eat your meal, Jinsol did the same.

Feeling regretful of what happened, she had no idea about you signing an NDA. Well, that is a supposed reason for being so secretive. “Ah that’s why he’s been with Jiwoo so much, he couldn’t say anything at BBC for what Jiwoo was doing.” The newfound knowledge is hitting Heejin as she and Sooyoung are enjoying watching this drama unfold.

Sooyoung and Heejin clink their wine glasses together, having the time of their life with front row seats of the new and current K-Drama they call “Jinsol and You.”

Dinner has passed, the welcome greetings are all done, it seems to be a casual thing now with ballroom dancing being open to all guests. Jiwoo is out there with Jungeun, Sooyoung and Haseul, Vivi is trying to teach Haneul to properly slow dance while not stepping on her feet, Heejin and Yong are having their drinks at the open bar on the other side of the hall.

Sooyoung’s and Haseul’s partners, Min-Joon and Gungjeun are sitting at the table having their coffee, while you? Sitting where you have been sitting all night. Jinsol? With Yerim and Jung. “You know you’re always in your own little world?” Joon sneaks up behind you with Gungjeun as all, shocking back into reality.

“Yah, what else am I supposed to do?” You try to defend yourself, although very poorly, but both of your friends know you’ve been thinking about something, well someone, all night. “We know you’re dying to have a moment with Jinsol.” Of course, they knew, these are your closes friends from the rest of the group, considering you only found out about half of them tonight.

“Why can’t you approach her?” Gungjeun asks, although Joon gives him a little stare. “Yah, you can’t outright just ask that, this kind of thing takes time.” And here you are, in the middle of them arguing of how you should go about your night. You lay your head down on the table in frustration.

“Excuse me?”

The two men arguing go silent, while you don’t bother to bring your head up. Both Joon and Gungjeun smile and get up from their seats, “Good luck” they say before leaving you. In confusion, you lift your head off the table and turning around behind you.

“Would you care to dance with me?”

Jinsol in her bright red dress, really a different choice for her as to oppose her normal black dresses. Jinsol put her hand out and with a smile on her face, she wanted this dance with you. “Sure” You took Jinsol’s hand in yours, smiling back at her as you get up from your chair. “Shouldn’t I be the one asking you to dance?” You jokingly said.

“You weren’t getting your ass of your chair all night.” Jinsol retorted back, of course she would have the winning comeback. “Yeah, that’s on me.” Your reply making Jinsol giggle.

Both you and Jinsol arrive to the dance floor and proceeded to get in a position to go along in a slow dance, her hands on the back of your neck, yours around her waist, just like the way you two danced with each other many, many times.

The eye contact between you two is electric, the smile on both of your faces is sickening to look at if you hated what couples look like when they’re happy. It was the first time you seen Jinsol smile to you, about you, in months. It was the first time Jinsol felt warm towards you, happy for you just as long.

“I finally understand why the last few months were rough.” Jinsol was the first to break the silence. “It’s not that I didn’t trust you, I was scared what could have happened legally.” Daewon explains to Jinsol, she’s finally understanding everything and nodding along. “With the ending of Queendom and the Flip That promotions, both of us were stressed and tired. I get it.” You can see Jinsol’s eyes tearing up ever so slightly.

“What will you be doing now?” Jinsol asks, you pretend to look deeply in thought to try cheering up Jinsol, which ended up working making her giggle. “I will be working part time for both BBC and Jiwoo’s company for the time being.” You explain to Jinsol your plans as the NDA you signed months ago is now voided with the official opening of the company.

“Then I guess you won’t be coming on tour with us?” Jinsol frowned a little as she can already guess your answer. “I’m sorry Soulie, I have my duties here with Yong and Jiwoo.” Jinsol just nodded and slip her arms from behind your neck to underneath your arms, essentially hugging you with her head resting on your chest.

You bring your arms together around Jinsol, hugging her back. “I miss you oppa.” She quietly says while the two of you are swaying slowly back and forth as the music plays in the background. “I miss you too Soulie.” You rest your cheek on top of Jinsol’s head, facing the same way as she is.

“Do you think it would work out… If we got back together?” Of course, that question was eventually going to be brought up. There was no avoiding it, there was never a subject that bothered you through your life, but being anything that involved Jinsol, it was always something that bothered you.

You kept swaying back and forth with Jinsol, your holds on each other eventually turned to full on hugs. Jinsol can hear your heart beating, how hard it’s beating, the nervousness that’s in you. Jinsol can hear that. You felt her grip around your back tighten up, you knew the lack of an answer is telling Jinsol that it wouldn’t.

“Jinsol.” Jinsol moved her head away from your chest and looks you in the eye. “It’s okay, I know.” Jinsol brings her hand up to your cheek, her smile slowly slips into a frown while you try to keep a smile on your face. “I still love you Soulie.” Little drops of tears start falling from Jinsol’s eyes. “I still love you too.”

“Keep dancing with me?” You ask, trying to keep this moment together while it’s still here. Jinsol nods and places her head back on your chest. You try to hold back the tears, you had to be strong for her, this is the choice you made.

The night went on, the later it gets more guests are departing, as each song play, the two of you continued swaying back and forth in the same spot.

.

.

.

.

.

“Should we stop them?” Sooyoung asks, Haseul shaking her head. “You can head to the van if you’re tired, I think she needs this.” Sooyoung nods and heads to the van outside, Gungjeun going along with him. “You can go, I can keep an eye on them.” Haseul’s partner Min-Joon offers as he pulls a chair next to Haseul.

Haseul lays her head on Joon’s shoulder. “Remember when we were so lost without each other?” Joon smiles slightly, knowing that Haseul ignored his questioned and continued to stay here for her member, no, her sister. “I remember jagi.” he reaches down for Haseul’s hand and almost by instinct, her hand was looking for his until eventually intertwining.

The current song comes to an end, the next song coming up shortly.

Haseul and Joon watch the young broken up couple continue dancing in the middle of the floor.

They were the only ones left on the floor.

~~~~~

It was the next day, you, Yong, In-Su, and Jiwoo take a trip to the airport to see off the other 11 girls to leave for their first world tour.

“Ah!!! Good luck! I’m going to miss you!” You swear you can hear Jiwoo screaming from one end of the airport all the way to the other side. “Yah, Jiwoo, you’re seeing them off, not trying to bust ear drums!” You complain as Jiwoo is possibly breaking everyone else’s eardrums around in the airport.

“Oops, sorry! I’m just going to miss them for the next two months.” Jiwoo pouts as she holds both Heejin and Jungeun in her arms. “Just let them be, I know I’ll miss you too.” Jinsol comes up next to you, understanding what Jinsol is saying, you nod and smile.

“What did you pack?” You turn and face Jinsol who is wearing a corgi themed neck pillow, in all grey sweats and socks and slippers. “Just clothes to sleep in and to go out in, my Switch, toothbrush, washroom essentials…” Jinsol went on and on about her list of things she packed, you smile knowing that Jinsol really grew up knowing how to take care of herself.

“Hey Soulie, I brought you a bag of snacks to take on the plane. I know how picky you are, so I picked out your favourites.” Jinsol smiled and accepted the bag. “Thank you.” Jinsol drops the bag down gently, and proceeds to give you a hug. You take the embrace and hug Jinsol, knowing that it’ll be two months without her presence.

“I’ll call you everyday.” You chuckle at Jinsol’s never ending clinginess, even though you two aren’t together anymore, she’s still your childhood best friend. “I won’t be going anywhere Soulie.” You tell her so she can feel more assured that everything is okay now, things can be made up between you two, but of course.

There’s always going to be that feeling of “what if.”

What if the two of you never broke up?

What if the two of you got back together?

“I’m going now.” You let go of Jinsol and she does the same. She smiles at you before picking up her bags and walk off to the gate with her members. You and Jiwoo start waving to the members a few of the boys who went on tour with them. They’re all looking towards you and Jiwoo waving at them, except for one.

Jinsol.

In a few short moments, everyone disappears into the tunnel.

“It’s going to be a long two months Jiwoo.” You continue staring at the gate, you were going to wait till the plane took off but there seem to be a weight on your shoulders that you can’t get rid of. Jiwoo didn’t say anything because she knows how you feel, seeing Jinsol like this, just making up the night before and only staying as friends.

.

.

.

.

.

“WAIT!!”

You heard a yell out of the tunnel, shocking you, Jiwoo and even the stone-faced Yong and In-Su who are in the distance waiting for you and Jiwoo.

“WAIT!!”

You turn around to see the source of the yell being a Jinsol doing her signature dork run from the tunnel to you, reminding you of the same night she found you alone in the park.

“Jinsol?!” You watch Jinsol run past the flight attendant at the desk and through the gate, although it seemed like Jinsol completely forgot she’s wearing slippers instead of regular shoes which the tip of the slipper gets caught on the ground, causing her trip and fall face flat.

“Omo, Jinsol!” You panic and you run past the lane dividers to a fallen Jinsol. You get down on both your knees, watching Jinsol also gets up on her knees.

In the moment of staring into each other’s eyes, both of you break into laughter.

The first interaction the last two days with her and it’s not awkward.

The first genuinely happy feeling between both of you.

“You’re crazy, you know that?” Amid the laughter, you really did expect Jinsol to be teary eyed and in pain, but it seems that the fall wasn’t that hard.

“I didn’t want to leave feeling any regret.” The laughter ended, Jinsol started holding your hand as she started speaking. “You’re my best friend, always had been and always will even if we’re not together anymore...” You went ahead and held Jinsol’s other hand as well as it felt like the moment. “Jinsol, before you leave, I just wanted to say…”

“I love you.”

You and Jinsol said simultaneously.

The incredible weight taken off your shoulders, Jinsol’s as well. Jinsol then leans in and kisses you on your cheek, just like how you two always did before even before getting together.

Your cheeks began to glow a very flushed red, not caring about how you look, you smile after Jinsol pulls away. “Get up from the dirty floor!” Jiwoo yells in the background, catching both yours and Jinsol’ attention to finally stand up.

“I’ll see you once you get back.” Jinsol nods and smiles. “I’ll see you.” Is all she said to you before slowly walking away that turned into a full run again, but this time inside the tunnel towards the plane. You start waving and this time she turns her head and waves back at you before disappearing inside the tunnel.

“Two months.” You thought to yourself knowing now instead of two long months, it’ll now be in two short months. The feeling of having someone wanting to come back to you really changes how you see everything.

~~~~~

Some time in the future.

“I don’t think this is working.”

#jeong jinsol #jinsoul #Loona #loona fic #kpopfic #fanfic #loona jinsoul #male reader #moonverse

[cupoftaae]

Forever and a day (KTH x READER) series♡ silent treatment cant last forever (chapter 5)

Summary: your lifelong friend is forced to face his true feelings for you once he breaks the number one rule of becoming friends with benefits: dont fall in love. He knows he loves you, but you on the other hand need more convincing of the most important thing: the right decision.

Genre: fwb. Roommates, friends to idiots to lovers, fluff, angst, smut, the whole 9 yards tbh.

Pairing: taehyung x female!reader

rating: 18+ (minors dni!!!)

word count- 4.1k

chapter warnings: swearing, tae is struggling :( kaito is a fucking LOSER and does a bad thing. literally all I can say is SORRY in advance !! mentions of domestic violence and abuse. Quick mention of pregnancy

A/N- I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, I have most of these already written out, but I like to take time and add ideas as I go along. I kinda came up with a plot twist that will eventually play out, just dont hate me. What can I say? I love angst. ALSO- chapter 6 will be out this weekend possibly, if not, then monday ;) just a treat bc ily guys

"he's such a fucking dumbass" Kaito scoffs and takes a sip of his wine, collapsing back onto the couch next to you. You remained quiet as he ranted after you told him about the night you had.

Immediately after coming back to the apartment with taehyung, you two ended up fighting again. Something about him being childish, you being self centered, him being nosey, and you not being the old you. What does that even mean? You havent changed at all, its him who is always starting these fights.

after that, you packed a bag and ran over to your boyfriends house. It wasnt where you wanted to be, exactly, but you needed a place to hide.

"I dont think he is a dumbass, I just think....hes....i dont know? having a midlife crisis?" you shrugged, leaning into your boyfriends touch.

"midlife crisis....at the ripe age of 23 years old?"

"yeah, I think he is always comparing himself to me, and hes confused about who he wants to be. He wishes he stayed in college so bad, he even signed up for this little credit art course they ha-"

"art??" kaito laughed covering his mouth for a moment

"yeah" you turned around to look at him

"so he thinks finger painting will help him snap into being an adult?"

you stared at him, scrunching your face up in thought. Yeah, you kinda poked at tae and made jokes, but you didnt mean any harm deep down. Maybe you dont understand his little desire to paint away his feelings, but watching kaito laugh about it is different, because he means it. You suddenly felt guilty for talking about him behind his back, even if he was a dick for yelling at you a few hours ago.

"he enjoys it, its kinda cute. If its helping him back onto his feet then who cares...its not like he quit his job or anything, kaito."

"cute? more like immature"

"hey, cmon, leave him alone"

"you cant seriously be defending him"

"I just dont like talking about people behind their back, you know?"

"whatever" he scoffed, taking a sip of his drink before pulling you onto his lap. "wait..." he stopped, thinking before laughing. "I thought....I thought you said you were sick?"

Your heart stopped the minuet he spoke, how could you forget your own fucking lie, more importantly, how is he just catching this?

"Oh I was feeling better, mhm. This morning I felt like shit but I figured it would be better to suck it up and go to the dinner anyways, should have stayed home!" you blurted out and got off his lap, standing to your feet.

"right" he eyed you, standing up as well as he put his drink down. "well....do you wanna go to bed?" he asked, doing that stupid smirk face that made you somewhat angry.

"uhm, well, yeah, but im really tired kai, also im still not feeling 100% you know? so, maybe we should sleep. just..sleep." you nodded quickly and turned around on the ball of your heel, only to be yanked around by the wrist.

Your eyes widened in shock at the sudden action from him, heart pounding in your ears. Was he drunk? who knows, but that was not an ok thing to do regardless.

"let go of me, what the fuck?" you breath out, trying to tug your hand out of his tightening grip.

"you arent lying to me about Taehyung right?"

"what? What are you talking ab- let go!"

"you wouldnt lie to avoid me, right? you and him arent doing shit behind my back?" he asked, anger in his voice, something youve never seen.

"No! theres nothing!! I promise, I was just sick and, kai you are scaring me please!" you whine, mad at the tears that showed up so quickly. He saw your eyes and immediately let go, making you yank yourself backwards quickly, allowing the tears to fall as you hugged yourself.

"oh my god, im so sorry baby, I didnt mean to d-"

You both looked down at the mark left on your wrist from his grip

"shit, im so.....im so sorry, y/n, listen-"

"get away from me!!" you yelled, "Im sleeping in the guest room, d-dont come in, sober the fuck up and dont touch me again, I swear to God..." your voice shakes as you spoke, aware that if he really wanted to, he could hurt you again.

you saw regret in his face, but it didnt matter. jealousy has always been an issue for him, but its never shown like this....it was scary.

you turn quickly to run upstairs, hiding in his guest bedroom and locking the door, you wanted to leave but also didnt have anywhere to go exactly. You promised to meet up with your friend Dahyun tomorrow for lunch, so you would have to ask her to pick you up earlier.

kaito looked at the wine glass that had spilled without him even knowing, sighing and sitting with his face in his hands instead of going after you.

-

Taehyung woke up the next morning in the same state he had fell asleep: mad, clothed, dirty, and missing you.

He knew he was fighting you when it was happening, but there was just an overstimulation of emotions that had over poured, and unfortunately, you happened to be the punching bag.

He made a mental note to call his parents and explain later as he walked into your room. you were still not there. Given the things he said, you doesn't blame you, however he would like to apologize.

He walked into the kitchen and looked at all the food, well, more like ingredients for meals he doesnt know how to make. You said something last night to him about him needing to depend on you with everything, including meals. It hurt, but it was right. He sighed and closed the fridge, moving to go sit on the couch in the quiet apartment before opening his phone to his social media’s.

He hated to see other people and how well they were doing, but he found himself online more often then he used to be, maybe it was to inspire or motivate him, he wasn’t sure. He scrolled across Annie’s art page, stopping to pay extra attention to one post in particular.

She was good, her art was something people would pay money to see, he understood why she would be in all the art classes she could find. The post showed her setting up at the banquet hall a few streets down, something about an art fair. Tae smiled and like the post, wanting to know more about it. He contemplated dming her, eventually just giving in and doing so.

Taehyung: hello Annie, it’s taehyung, you probably know that because you can see my name, anyways, I saw your recent post and was wondering what you were setting up for?

He tapped his phone with his fingers, feeling odd to text someone who wasn’t, well, you.

He was surprised to see her answer quickly

Annie: hey tae :)) i was hoping you would text soon enough. I’m setting up for an art festival at the Julie banquet hall! You should totally come if you aren’t busy :0!!!

He laughed and bit his nail, suddenly hearing your voice in his head telling him not to do that...bad habit.

He texted back

Taehyung: when is it?

Annie: it’s being held this entire week for a viewing, but next weekend there is a contest....winner gets a prize!

taehyung smiled and looked around, that could be huge for him. Maybe this was the universal sign from the universe he needed, a sign that his rash decisions were actually working out for him. He knew he probably wouldn’t be able to go down today, for obvious reasons other than the fact he needs a shower.

He also needed to prepare something worth winning, and that required time.

Taehyung: oh wow...that sounds really interesting. I’ll probably be down later this week, thanks for letting me know.

He tossed his phone to the side and began to head for his room, knowing that he wouldn’t leave until he created a masterpiece.

As fun as this was, he had to admit, it was a good distraction from you.

-

"How come kai couldnt just drop you off?" Dahyun looked over at you, taking a bite of her sandwich. "well, he was a bit hungover, he had a lot to drink last night" you cleared your throat, sipping your water.

It had been a while since you and your friend saw eachother, and going out for lunch together was nice, a step away from all the boy drama going on. You were in college, and you just wanted to do normal stuff and leave the high school shit behind.

Dahyun sat back and looked you over, concern on her face. "sweetheart are you alright?"

"why wouldnt I be?

"because you look like shit, in the nicest way. Have you been sleeping?"

you laugh, looking down at your hands, "yeah, ....well, no"

"mhm, whats going on?"

"tae and I got into a fight last night, and it was just really annoying because we are always fighting nowadays, I hate it."

"is that why you were at kaitos?"

you nodded, eyes looking out the window. "I should have just stayed at the apartment though. I hate to admit it but I kinda miss him, he hasnt texted me" you sighed and re-checked your phone.

"hes a grown man, y/n, he can handle shit"

you looked at your friend, quick to remind yourself that they dont see the true venerability of taehyung like you do, they dont know that he's just emotional and feels things differently than others, so as much as you hate to say it....he cant take care of himself.

"mm" you shrug, taking a bite of a fry. "lets just talk about something else?" you suggest

"okay, let me think...." dahyun smiled to herself, searching her brain for something to talk about. "Oh did you hear about chae?" she suddenly spoke up

"no, what about her? is she ok?"

"dude she had such a pregnancy scare, she called me 2 nights ago because she was fully convinced she was preggo....shes not though so its alright" she shrugged

your eyes widened at your friends words, "what?...how did I not know this? why didnt she call me?"

"well, not to start anything but...we kinda have been calling and texting you, but you dont seem to have time anymore, which is perfectly fine, but we miss you."

you slumped down into your seat, food on the plate in front of you has now gone cold and unedible. "I dont know, man. Life is so messy right now, theres just so much going on. I miss you guys like crazy, we need to plan like a sleepover or a girls weekend." you suggest, leaning into the palm of your hand sadly.

"hey, y/n, just breathe, everything will be okay. If you are free next weekend I know a friend of mine is throwing a really fun party, i'll text you the info if you are down to go?"

you smiled hopefully, not that you were the super most outgoing person on campus, but the idea of going to a party with other kids seemed like a set up to meet some new people.

"Dahyun that sounds really fun, yes please send me the info, is chae going?" you ask, pulling out your phone

"mhm, yep...but we are gonna have to keep her with us because her boyfriend is going...well now ex boyfriend considering they broke up over this whole 'almost pregnant' scare, and-"

you quickly shut out your friends voice as you checked your socials, suddenly coming across a photo taehyung had posted on his story of a painted canvas, seemed normal enough, except the fact someone was there with him. at your apartment.

you whip your head up, "I think I have to go, im sorry, uh, something just came up and I need to get home, but uhm, you'll have to text me about nate and chae!" you spoke quickly, grabbing your purse and standing. "Thank you for having me out, I really needed it. Dont forget to text me the party details!!" you sing as you hug her and make a dash for the door.

-

You exited the elevator and made your way down the hall quickly, searching for your keycard in your over packed purse before bumping into someone and falling to the floor.

"ow? hel-, oh.." you quiet down when your eyes meet the person waiting outside your apartment door. kaito.

"What are you doing here?" you quickly stood to your feet and brushed past him, still searching for the key.

"baby, you havent answered my calls, we need to talk about last night. Im so sorry, I never meant to make you feel unsafe, im going through so much and I just....I just, I dont know what happened, but im so sorry!" he rambled quickly, touching your back and making you stop your movements.

"kaito..."

"i know, im so sorry, i suck and im an asshole and you probably hate me, I would too"

you sighed as your hands fell to your sides, turning to face him. "you....you arent an asshole, dont say that." you breathe out, grabbing his hand "just promise me you'll cut down on the drinking or something...I dont wanna see that again." you felt guilt throughout your chest as he looked down.

"I promise, baby, I will"

you pulled him into a hug and squeezed him, rubbing his back and moving to kiss his cheek. "head home, now, please" you whispered, watching his face fall.

"wait why? I was hoping we could hang out or make food or something?" he gestures towards your front door. "hm, Im sorry kai, maybe after classes sometime this week, I have to handle something right now...you know how he is" you quieted your voice at the last part, watching your boyfriend nod.

"okay....just, uh, text me ok?"

you smiled and nodded, "of course"

once he made a turn for the hall, you placed your keycard into the door and walked into the apartment to see Annie and Taehyung in the kitchen. You usually werent too keen on having random people in your house, you and tae promised to not invite others there without letting eachother know.

"y/n..." tae turned and saw you, making annie stop whisking whatever was in the bowl she held.

"tae" you nod, waving quietly to the short girl behind him. "didnt know there was something going on today" you joke, putting your bag down and walking in with arms crossed over your body.

"I just invited her over because it was a little too quiet over here" he joked, looking at her and smiling.

"ah I see" you smile and lean against the island counter. "what are you guys making?"

"apple pie" annie cheerfully responds, moving to her phone to change the song that was playing

"oh, yummy" you awkwardly reply, somewhat angry that she was in your kitchen and took it upon herself to use your ingredients that you bought yourself.

"tae, can we talk?" you turn to him, talking quietly.

"yeah..." he looked over at annie, "ill be right back"

she replied with a thumbs up before returning to her baking, reading the recipe off tae's phone.

You led him into your room before shutting the door and leaning against it, the boy looking back at you like he was expecting to get yelled at. "I'm sorry" you exhale, "For the other night, I dont wanna keep doing this with you" you shrug

"I dont wanna fight with you either." he spoke simply, biting the inside of his cheek nervously.

"I dont...I dont really know whats been going on with us but I rather just sit and be your friend than your enemy, you know"

he nodded, "you are right, and Im sorry too, all that shit I said, I didnt mean it, It was out of frustration which still isnt okay bu-"

you cut him off with a hug, "its okay"

he took a moment before wrapping his arms around you in return, "Are you mad she is here?" he whispered, "no...just wish you would have texted me...."

"i know, im sorry" he shook his head, sighing. "um, also, my parents called and I explained kinda the situation simply and they seemed to understand somewhat. I spoke honestly with them about how their words effected me and shit, and they said they would try to stop...well...mostly my mom will try to stop" he laughed, making you smile.

"they want us to go over to their house before they go back home, sometime later this week. I know you have classes and stuff but even if its just for one night over there, ill drive you to school in the morning if you need" he added.

"okay, we will work it out, im proud of you for sticking up for yourself" you laughed softly, making him look down shyly. "did you take your medication today?" you remembered to ask suddenly

he looked up at you and pressed his lips together before hesitantly shaking his head, "uh...I forgot.."

you sigh, "okay, lets go take it" you grabbed his hand and went back into the kitchen, brushing past annie to get to the medicine cabinet.

You took notice of how the girl eyed you and your hand against his, making you smirk to yourself. Even if you and tae were just friends, you knew no one would ever be able to squeeze between you both, not kaito nor annie.

"here, bubs" you whisper, handing him his pill and a water bottle

"whats that?" annie spoke up, cutting up apples on your good cutting board you didnt even get to use yet, making your eye twitch.

"allergy meds" taehyung spoke up, taking a sip of water as you look back at him with sympathetic eyes, his face telling you to just not say anything. His ADHD was something he assumed he should be ashamed of, something people would always use to blame his behavior on.

He didnt want to be that, he just wanted to be Taehyung.

Annie nodded and patted her hands on her apron before moving to the next thing, engaging in conversation with taehyung. "so what were you saying before she came in?" she asked, catching you off guard as you threw your hands up and walked over to tidy the living room area.

"Oh I was just talking about the art thing and how-"

"tae.." you stopped fluffing the pillows to turn to him, making annie sigh as you once again interrupted their conversation.

"what?" he looked around, confused.

"why arent you working? todays a work day?"

"oh, uh-...."

Annie smiled, "I didnt know you had a job, where do you work?"

Tae looked between the two of you before speaking up, "well...I used to work at this buisn-"

"used to? you got fired??" you walked over and held his arm

"no no....I quit, like....last week" he huffed, seeming relieved to get it off his chest. "tae, why did you, what?? why would you do that?" you looked at him seriously, knowing that there was no income for you two anymore.

"because I plan to apply for college again, I have a whole thing in the works, y/n, I promise, I didnt just do it on a whim" he spoke quickly

"y/n, he can handle himself" annie sarcastically spoke with a smile

"kindly leave please, him and I need to talk" you finally looked back at her, making her plead to taehyung.

"what? but we were doing something!" she puts the rolling pin down when tae shrugged, "im sorry annie, ill text you okay?" he walked her out before apologizing again and shutting the door.

"well aint she the sweetest" you scoff and collapse on the couch. "come here please" you spoke calmly, wanting to approach this correctly. Taehyung walked over slowly and sat on the couch next to you, keeping his body close and away from you.

You took a deep breath in and looked at him, "tae, honey, why did you do that?"

he shrugged, sighing.

"look at me"

he turned his head around to you after a few seconds, revealing the tears in his eyes. "tae..."

you are quick to wrap him into your arms, "its ok, im not mad. I just wish you told me, everything makes more sense now" you mumble

"Im sorry for not saying anything, I was just so unhappy working there and I just had to leave" he chokes out, face hidden into your shoulder. your hand finds his hair as he gently pulls away.

"i'll find a side job or something, but I really am serious about this school thing" he quickly muttered as you wiped his tears.

"Its okay...I can probably pick up tutoring for Mrs.Chin again, she pays well and if I do it after classes everyday it'll probably be enough to sustain rent" you sigh, rubbing his arm.

you watched as the boys face was filled with regret and sadness, making your heart split in two. "dont tell my parents, please" he whispers

"no...of course not" you smile lightly, "ive learned my lesson"

Taehyung laughed and leaned back against the end of the couch, head looking up at the ceiling. "so....we can talk more later if you like, but for now lets go finish making that apple pie" you leaned into him jokingly, making him laugh.

You two got up and walked into the kitchen "why did you let her use my cutting board" you pouted

"im sorry" he smiled shyly "If it counts, I know nothing about how to bake, and if I was the one making the pie we would all be food poisoned."

you laughed, "i'll teach you"

-

You two sat in Taehyungs bedroom, both eating a slice of apple pie as he played some game on his Xbox, you watching.

"so..." you began, scarping your fork on your plate. "art, huh?"

he paused his game and turned to you, smiling, "what?"

"youre passionate about it?"

"yeah, I suppose" he shrugged, watching you get up and walk over to his desk. "I saw these on instagram, they are actually quite nice" you added, eyeing them over as he came up behind you. "yeah, those were just some doodling to be honest." he itched his neck.

"but uh, im working on something big. Can I show you?" he spoke, watching you nod before pulling a canvas from his closet and placing it down.

The sketch included an empty, bare forest of trees in the center of a town square, details to a perfect ten on even the smallest things. "Its not done, not in the slightest but..."

"woah.....holy shit tae, you...wow" you were actually in awe. You knew he liked art, but this was beyond anything youve seen from him, it genuinely made you feel something. "this is really beautiful, is this pencil work?"

"thank you" he mumbled shyly, a blush on his face, "yeah, its pencil, I plan to add color to everything but the tree, itll remain black and white." he spoke, looking it over himself.

"does it mean anything?" you pondered aloud.

"well...its like this, trees lose everything they have in the winter, no leaves no flowers, nothing, right?" he spoke as you listened, "yet they still are just...there, while everything continues to progress and move around them, because they know if they wait, whats theirs will grow back."

"wow...." you said again, truly speechless by his work. Clearly you underestimated him, because this is beyond anything youve seen.

He looked at you lovingly before clearing his throat and putting it away again, "yeah... its for this art contest that Annie told me about. Winner gets like, a cash prize, im not sure how much, but it doesnt matter because they also win a trip to a really cool art museum in Paris" he looked back at you.

"Paris?...wow tae, I have no doubts you will win this"

"dont jinx it" he teased, walking back to his chair.

you put your hands up in defense, giggling. "so is it an art show?" you asked, following him

"yeah, I was actually gonna ask if you wanted to come....the exhibit is all this week and I plan on going on friday....was gonna ask if you'd wanna come with?" he spoke quietly, hopeful tone evident.

"hmm..I would love to" you smiled and grabbed his plate to clear, heading towards the kitchen

"oh, also...." he sat up, making you turn to him. "whats up?" you ask,

"I know this is kinda odd, but would you mind if you just...like, slept in here tonight?"

your eyes widened at him, making him feel like he overstepped

"I shouldnt have said that im sorry, I just didnt sleep last night and I always fall asleep quickly with you"

you giggled quietly, "no its okay, ill sleep here alright?" you watched his face light up , nodding

"thank you..."

-

"what happened to your arm?" tae asked as you climbed into his bed and shut the light off.

"what do you mean?" you were confused, sitting the side opposite of him. Taehyung pointed to your wrist, oh...yeah, that.

"oh I burnt myself, curling iron. wasnt paying attention" you sighed as he frowned. "be careful, ok?"

you nodded, "ok"

once you both were in and under the covers, the silence was welcoming. To be fair, you slept best here too, and the last time you laid here the circumstances were completely different, so it was a bit weird.

You laughed to yourself when you heard his soft snores after a few minuets, he wasnt joking. you lifted your arm and raised your fingers across your wrist.

be careful

there was so much to be careful about, and if only he knew the full extent of it.

You looked over at the sleeping boy next to you before turning to your side and closing your eyes, allowing yourself to just be here, in his bed, in this very moment, because it gave you the safety and comfort you needed so badly

be careful .....

taglist-

@turnthepageandbeburnt

@taebangtanbabe

@kthstrawberryshortcake-main

@borahaexoxo

@lelefoodlover

@tan-veee

#taehyung smut #kim taehyung #taehyung #taehyung fluff #taehyung fanfic #kim taehyung bts #kpopfic #kim taehyung fanfic #bts fluff #bts x reader #bts smut #bts fanfic #bts #kth x reader #taehyung drabble #tae fic #tae smut #tae x reader #tae fluff #tae drabble #run bts

[whatsk-poppinhomies]

A Million Miles of Heartbreak Pairing : Sim Jaeyun x F!Reader TW : long distance relationship ; breakups ; generally angsty ; Jake is kind of an asshole ; Word Count : 1.4k A/N : Starting off the New Year with a quick angsty one! Let's go!!

“Oh man, have you seen the new trainee? She’s so cute.” Jake said as he sat beside the guys at the table in the cafeteria. He had managed to pass by her on the way down to get lunch, and it was like seeing the girl of his dreams, it was almost like she was haloed in the fluorescent lights that hung in the ceiling, he could barely keep his eyes off of her. “Think she might be the one honestly. I’ve never seen anyone so beautiful.” He mused, earning himself chuckles, eyerolls, and sounds of disgust from the other six guys around the table. 

“Then go talk to her. Don’t tell us about it.” Jay grumbled, his nose wrinkled in disgust. “And don’t let your heart eyes mess up your practice. Just… pretend like she’s watching or something.” Jake grumbled incoherently under his breath at Jays clear lack of interest in the conversation, but quickly turned his attention to Sunghoon who seemed mildly curious. It felt like he just had to talk about it, he had to talk about her. He had only seen her once and she already took over every corner, nook, and cranny of Jakes mind, and he didn’t ever want her to leave it. 

The hands on the clock lined up perfectly, just as they did every single day, to the time where you’d jump on your computer and call your boyfriend. He was the love of your life, and you couldn’t wait until you were actually able to be with him in person. It was crazy just how much you were able to love someone over the internet, someone that you had never spent a day with in real life, but you spent every single day with through your computer screen at least for an hour or two, and for the both of you, that was enough. The promise of being able to see him, being able to hear his voice, that’s what kept you going throughout the day, that’s what kept you happy. 

The call tone chimed in your headphones as you waited for him to pick up, and you felt like every single weight that had been on your shoulders were removed when you saw his face come up on your screen. “Hey!” He called out to you, his smile making your heart skip a beat when he flashed it to you. “I’ve got something amazing to tell you!” He said, and you couldn’t help the excitement that swelled in your chest at his words. 

“I have something amazing to tell you too!” You exclaimed back, and you did. You had managed to purchase tickets to go to South Korea so you could see him in person, having saved up all the money you had made the last couple months and requesting time off work so you could go out there. The trip was booked for next week, and while you wanted it to be a surprise for him, you also needed someone to pick you up from the airport. “You can go first though. Do you have a big concert coming up, or a tour?” You hadn’t heard anything about either of the two, and you hoped that your plans didn’t class with his schedule. 

“Alright, alright… So…” His breaths were coming out quicker now, more heavy, it was like being in a wind tunnel in your headphones, but he seemed so excited, so you simply turned down the volume and listened intently to what he had to say. “There’s this new trainee at the building… Oh man… She’s so perfect, so beautiful. She’s like, the perfect girlfriend. I think I’m gonna talk to her, get to know her, ask her out. What do you think?” 

Had you heard him wrong? That would be impossible. You couldn’t have possibly heard his entire plan wrong… But… It didn’t make any sense to you and it felt like your head was spinning as you tried to wrap your brain around what he said. “I… I thought… I’m your girlfriend… We’ve been dating for two years…” You mumbled, the disappointment and hurt that you were feeling was evident in your voice.

His eyes wavered as he seemed to look around the room that he was in, and he’d take a deep breath as if he were about to talk, and then let it out in a heavy sigh, the process repeated about three times before he finally spoke. “Of course you are… I just thought that while we were waiting to see each other, to be together… Well, you know…” He shrugged his shoulders, his teeth barred as he inhaled sharply through them. “I mean, let’s be fair here… You can’t really have a life with someone over the computer. There’s never going to be anything really there.” 

You nodded your head in agreement although his words came as the biggest slap in the face. It was like your heart was being ripped from your chest and all you could do was sit and watch as he squeezed it in his hands until it stopped beating. “It’s not like I wasn’t trying…” You mumbled, unable to even look at him through the screen anymore. He was the love of your life, you truly thought that there would be something there between the two of you, you felt that there already was, but that clearly wasn’t a shared feeling. “I even… I bought tickets… To come out there…” 

His lips parted into a small o as he watched you, and even though he wasn’t really there, you could feel his eyes on you through the screen. “Really? Well… When were you supposed to come out? Was that what… Was that what you were going to tell me?” You weakly nodded, your head still lowered as you looked down at your phone screen, the email for the tickets pulled up and your tongue in your cheek as you stared at it. “You can still come out. I still want to see you… I didn’t know that… Hey… Come on, baby… Look up at me.” 

The pet name that would usually have you gushing or squealing now had you feeling disgusted and foolish, your skin crawling and the hairs on your neck standing on end. “So… If I didn’t have the tickets… You’d just go about your pursuit of the new trainee?” You whispered, your thumb hovering over the button for the refund. “I thought you really liked me… That you really wanted to be with me. You said that we’d be able to make this work… That you wanted this to work.” You shook your head, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath in an attempt to ward off the tears and fight back the sob that was building in your throat. “You lied… You didn’t want it to work, you didn’t even think it would… You just strung me along because it was convenient for you until you found someone that you could really be with. I was supposed to come out next week… Surprise!” You said unenthusiastically, pressing the refund button and finally looking up at the screen, scowling at him directly through the webcam. “But I’m not. You can spend that week chasing after the new trainee that would be the perfect girlfriend.” You mocked him, finding joy in the look of regret that was painted on his face. “Have fun.” 

“Y/N, that’s not what I want, I was just-” But before he could finish you ended the call, pulling off your headphones and placing them off to the side of your desk as you got up and walked over to your bed. You should have known this would happen, you should have known that it would never be real, but you were so blinded by the love that you had for him that you didn’t want to face that reality. Now you had been hit with it, blindsided by it, and while you had done well in acting unbothered by it when he was still on the call, now that you were alone you could cry, you could have that breakdown that had been building inside of you from the moment he uttered the first word about the new girl. 

Long distance relationships weren’t always awful, they sometimes worked out, but a long distance relationship with someone like him was destined to fail, and in the end, you were the one that was left broken hearted and crying into your pillow. He would move on and ultimately forget that it ever happened, he was far too busy to let someone like you fog his thoughts, but you had just the right amount of free time to have your heart broken, to let the thought of him and what you wished could have been plague every waking and sleeping moment of your day. 

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[yang2sfishkeeper]

ateez as vampires (hyung line)

side note: this is not a sexy-blood dripping down chin interpretation (as much as I wish it was) might do the maknae line if i dont forget this acc exists

HONGJOONG:

The kind that has tried every lasting occupation known to man. He was probably an oil paint portrait artist whenever those were a thing, a philosopher and then a nursery daycare teacher all in the span of fifty years. Any form of vampirism takes a backseat to his colourful portfolio, and I firmly believe he is currently a haute couture designer for vintage pieces; and only drinks the blood of people who refuse to ethically source their leather and furs. The image of him living in some apartment in Paris smoking a cigarette (that has a hole in it because of his fangs) is perfect to me.

SEONGHWA:

The brooding, edward cullen type. I’m talking; hand perpetually covering ¾ of his face, avoiding sunlight at all costs, falls in love with some pale girl kind of edward cullen. He has to move every ten years because all the women feel like cougars when they go after him despite him being at least double their age. He lives in some dusty cob-webbed mansion in the forest during the weekends but his real house is a small flat and he’s best friends with his elder neighbour who he has dinner with sometimes. Wears contacts to cover his eye colour but it's not strong enough so people think he’s always wearing red Halloween contacts.

YUNHO :

Newly turned vampire who just wants to go back to his normal life. Has trouble controlling his cravings and tries to drink a gallon of tomato juice because that's what google told him to do. He got violently sick and now just sticks to blood bags. Doesn’t understand why he’s always surrounded by crows and black cats (he is a dog person) but is very thankful to have so many furry friends. Definitely the type to accidentally show his strength by breaking the football goal net, or accidentally shaking someone’s hand very tightly because he was excited. People thought he was a werewolf, honestly.

YEOSANG:

Sitting on a chaise lounge, monotonously sipping on a glass of blood while wearing eyeliner. That’s sort of the image I get when thinking of him. Something very high class and untouchable that demands respect from his peers. But at the same time he’s only pretending to read The Art of War, and is using it to cover his copy of some trashy romance novel he’s actually reading. Secretly really wants the modern human experience, but is too attached to the concept of velvet couches to really let go. I can see him pointing towards any form of fast food and saying “What... desperate concoction is that?” While grimacing (he really wants to try it)

#ateez #ateez vampire au #vampire ateez #hongjoong #seonghwa #yeosang #yunho #ateez imagines #kpopfic #ateez non idol au #i havent posted here in almsot a year hahaha

[ftmfics]

han jisung - roll call

fanfic : cute, angsty , highschool.

total chapters : 22

intro

how could someone's precense make other person so happy and cheerful. it was possible for choi y/n.

han and his two other friends juwon and seojun were gonna play soccer match against other schools. y/n was gonna help them.

chapters :

chapter 1 ,

chapter 2 ,

chapter 3 ,

#hanjisung #han #skz #stray kids #stray kids imagine #stray kids imagines #kpop #han jisung x reader #kpopfic #kpop imagine #kpop fic #quokka #han quokka #cute #fluff #angst

[bluenails074]

Hold my hand and don't let go

Synopsis: Harua wasn't feeling well but he didn't want to burden his members, so he didn't say anything until it was too late

Genre: hurt/comfort, fluff (platonic)

Warnings: medical content, needle phobia, being overworked, exhaustion, physical and emotional distress...

Note: please be kind<33 (if you don't like it go away :p)

As we all know being a kpop idol ain't easy. Sometimes it leads to injuries, strained muscles or getting overworked.

Well one day, as &team were practicing hard for the upcoming comeback, Harua woke up feeling a little weak. He felt very cold and his head was pounding. He thought it was nothing and so he just brushed it off.

"Harua why aren't you eating?" Nicho asked. "You barely touched your food."

"I'm not hungry hyung." Harua answered even though he was hungry but his stomach felt like it would burst if he ate something.

"Harua you have to eat something." K said. "We have four hours of practice. You'll need energy for that."

"Yeah Harua eat at least a few bites." Fuma encouraged. Harua ate just a few bites of his food but it made him feel so much worse. After a few minutes, when everyone finished their breakfast, Harua felt nauseous and like he wanted to throw up.

"Rua are you okay?" Maki asked worryingly

"I feel like I'm gonna puke." Harua answered in a panic. "Like the breakfast inside me wants to get out."

"Okay, okay go to the toilet then, I'll go tell Fuma hyung."

"NO! DON'T TELL HIM!"

"Why not? You're clearly not well. You should stay at the dorm and rest. "

"No! I need to practice more. The comeback is coming and I'm not ready."

"Well i won't let you put yourself at risk, your heath comes first. Plus the hyungs need to know Harua."

"No they don't. It's just a little stomach ache. It will pas- *gag*" Harua didn't get to finish his sentence as they both kneeled down next to the toilet. Maki rubbed Harua's back while he was throwing up.

"That's it Haru, let it all out." Maki encouraged. After Harua finished he went to wash his face.

"Even if i don't tell them they'll find out. You know that." Maki said.

"Yeah, i know but you can't be the one who's going to tell them. How about this? If i feel like my condition is getting worse, I'll tell the hyungs. But you CAN'T.

"Okay" maki answered worryingly

"You promise?"

"Promise i guess"

"Okay then let's go. We're gonna be late for practice.

When they arrived, every minute Harua felt weaker and weaker and the thought of 4 HOURS OF PRACTICE alone made him question how he's going to get through this.

He got through the warm up pretty easily but the rest was a lot more challenging than usual. It was ten times harder than he expected. After some time passed, he started feeling very exhausted and it showed in the way he danced.

"Harua, make those moves sharper!" The coach yelled. "More energy Harua!" He tried to give his all but it wasn't enough. At this point he didn't know how long he would be able to continue like this. He felt his fever increased and he started shivering, but again he didn't say anything cause he didn't want to alert his members.

"Okay, you guys can take 5." Their coach yelled as they finished the choreography. The members took their water bottles and sat down in the corner of the practice room.

"Harua, are you okay? You're kind of pale." Taki noticed.

"Yeah, is everything okay? Why are you shaking?" Fuma asked as he took Harua's hands in his own to make them warmer.

"Y-yeah I'm o-okay it's j-just a little c-cold in h-here." Harua said while studering.

"Cold? It's literally so hot in here." Jo exclaimed. Fuma put a hand on Harua's forehead.

"Oh wow! Harua you're burning. Maybe you should sit down a bit." Fuma said worryingly as he moved Harua's soaked in cold sweat bangs to the side.

"No I'm okay guys, i'll just go wash my face in the bathroom and i'll be fine."

"I'll go with you." Fuma said following Harua out of the room. His gut was telling him he shouldn't let Harua go to the bathroom alone. Harua washed his face but he still didn't fell good at all. He started feeling a bit light headed. His head started spinning, his ears were ringing and his whole body was aching.

"Harua you really look sick, I think you should go to the nurse."

"I-i told you I'm totally fi-fi..ne.."

"GUYS COME HERE QUICK HE FAINTED" Fuma shouted alarmingly as he caught Harua.

The members rushed to the bathroom. Euijoo immediately turned on leader mode.

"Guys call the menager. Tell him we're taking Harua to the nurse. Fuma pick him up, let's take him there." Euijoo commanded.

When they got to the nurse they put Harua on the examination table.

"Fuma, K and I will stay with him, you guys go back to practice and stretch." Euijoo told the rest of the members.

"Hyung, i just got of the phone. The menager said he'll cancel the schedule for the rest of the day, and that he has the car ready if you need to take Rua to the hospital." Maki explained.

"Okay, thanks now go back to practice and stretch, then all of you can go back to the dorms." Fuma said. "Don't worry we'll keep you updated on Rua's condition."

"Okay okay, thanks hyung." Maki thanked them before leaving. "Um hyung, there's one more thing I have to tell you.."

"Mhm, and that is...?"

"Harua threw up after breakfast."

"HE WHAT?!!" K, Fuma and Euijoo exclaimed "And why did nobody tell us?!"

"Well only me and Rua knew and he didn't want to tell you so... yeah"

"Okay, we'll talk later, now go, i can see Jo waiting outside for you." Fuma said

"Okay, okay bye" Maki said before leaving

"Boys what happened?" The nurse asked calmly as she walked into the office (she wasn't in the office when they got there so Jo and Yuma went to find her) .

"Well he's been looking very pale since this morning and he barely ate anything for breakfast. After breakfast he also threw up and he looked very unwell during practice so i went to the bathroom with him, and there he fainted." Fuma explained to the nurse.

The nurse measured Harua's blood pressure, heart rate, and oxygen levels, when suddenly he regained his consciousness.

"Look he's waking up!" K said worriedly.

"Hyung, what's going on? Why is everything spinning?" Harua asked, looking like he's on the verge of tears.

"Hey, hey, don't panic. It's okay." K said reassuringly combing the youngers hair. "You fainted so we brought you to the nurse's office".

"Harua how are you feeling now?" The nurse asked.

"Everything's spinning and my head hurts."

"Is he gonna be okay?" Euijoo asked the nurse after she finished checking Harua's vitals.

"Yes, but his blood pressure is at a very low level, so knowing that your comeback is coming up i think he should get checked out by a doctor to see if he's just exhausted or if there's some kind of bigger issue. And even if it's just exhaustion, he should get an iv drip or some medication to boost his immune system." The nurse explained.

"Okay, we'll take him to the er now." The boys thanked the nurse and K gave Harua a piggyback ride to the car.

When they got to the er they were seated in a small room.

"Well, Harua you are showing sings of exhaustion and a mild fever, but I'd still like to run a blood test just to make sure that there are no further complications." The doctor explained after doing a check up on Harua.

Harua's eyes widened. "A-a b-blood test?!"

"Yes, a blood test, a nurse will see you shortly. Do you have any questions?"

"No, thank you doctor" Fuma answered noticing the fear in Harua's eyes. As soon as the doctor left, Harua started panicking.

"HYUNG PLEASE I CAN'T TAKE A BLOOD TEST! YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I HATE NEEDLES! PLEASE HYUNG! PLEASE"

"Whoa whoa calm down Haru. I'm sure you'll be just fine" K said calmly.

"Yeah, you won't even feel it" Fuma added

"Plus you have us by your side" Ej said offering a warm smile

"No but you don't get it. I HATE NEEDLES. They're so disgusting and pointy and they hurt and i just can't. Please tell them i won't take the blood test."

"Look at it this way.." Fuma said trying to make the younger seem less scared. "This blood test will tell us if there's anything wrong with your immune system. And since we have the tour soon we all have to be healthy and in great shape. So this little needle that you won't even feel, could help you a lot." Fuma explained

"Hello boys!" A nurse interrupted them. "I see you're up for a blood test Harua."

"Y-yeah" Harua answered as the nurse put down a tray with medical equipment on it.

"H-Hyung..." Harua closedhis eyes quickly, panically tapping the bed, searching for Fumas hand, when he saw what was placed on the tray.

"I saw the needle" he said on the verge of tears.

"Alright, you saw it, but it doesn't matter cause you're going to look at me and think about something else and not the needle, okay?" Fuma said trying to make Harua as calm as possible.

"Harua, don't worry. The needle is very small, and it won't last long" The nurse explained calmly. "If you want I'll tell you everything that I'm doing, so there are no surprises."

"Mhm, thank you" Harua answered, clearly terrified.

"Could i see your arms please? Just to see which one is better?" The nurse asked.

Harua showed the nurse his arms as Fuma rubbed his shoulders to ease his nerves. After a minute she found a vain to inject.

"Okay, now I'll firstly use an alcohol swab to clean the area. It might be a little cold."

Harua squeezed Fumas hand tightly. "H-Hyung i-i can't b-breathe." Harua said in a panic.

"Look at me here, look how I'm breathing and imitate that okay?" Euijoo said trying to help Harua.

"Can i start the process now?" The nurse asked

"Yeah breathe in... and breathe out.." K tried yo help.

"Wait! Hyung i can't.. seriously, I'm too scared! I really can't" Harua whimpered trying to catch his breath.

When the nurse touched his arm he pulled away.

"Okay, okay take your time." she said patiently.

"Harua, look at me! It'll be over in less than a minute. This suspense hurts more than any needle. So just let the nurse do her job and finish this as soon as possible." Fuma said "We're with you. Just take some deep breaths."

Harua took a few deep breaths "okay i'm ready, but don't let go of my hand."

No, don't worry, i won't." Fuma squeezed his hand reassuringly. Harua closed his eyes shut and waited for the nurse to inject him.

"Okay 3,2.. " she said before inserting the needle

"A-au H-Hyung... Mhh it hurts" Harua whimpered as the needle pierced his skin.

"Over in a second, just don't move" Fuma hugged Harua so that he feels safer. At this point Harua was crying but without noise. You could only hear him violently sobing.

"You're doing so good Haru!" Euijoo said

"Yeah just a few more seconds and it's done." K added

"And done! That's it, you did amazing!" the nurse said trying to make Harua stop crying

"That's it, you did it!" Fuma said running his fingers through Harua's hair.

"Good job!" Euijoo said

"Yeah you did so well!" K exclaimed

"Could you press here for him please?" The nurse asked K.

"Mhm, of course" he said taking Harua's arm so he could press the cotton ball that was placed where the needle went. Harua flinched when K pressed Harua's arm.

"No, no it's just me" K said gently.

"A doctor will come see you after we see the test results". The nurse said before leaving the room.

After some time, a doctor went to tell the members about the results.

"So Harua, the test showed thet you're very dehydrated, and you're lacking vitamins. That's what caused the fever. It also showed that we won't have to do an ECG. A nurse will give you an IV, which will last about 2 hours and that should boost your immune system. Apart from that i will prescribe some pills to control that fever and your stomach, so you can eat something without vomiting. If the he faints again, bring him back to the hospital. Even though i don't think that will be needed. Do you have any other questions?"

"No thank you doctor" Fuma answered quickly before Harua could say something.

"Alright, then I'll send the nurse here" tha doctor said before leaving

"Hyunggg..." Harua said with puppy eyes

"You did it once, im sure you can do it again" Fuma answered.

"But it hurts so much"

"Well we'll be by your side" K said trying to convince Harua

"Hello boys" a nurse said a she walked inside. The boys greeted her and she told them how Harua is going to come with her to a different room where he'll be untill the iv drip is over.

"The room is really small so it would be great if only one person came inside with Harua."

"Hyung what do i do.." Harua asked worriedly

"I'll go with you if you want?" K said

"Yeah you can go with K" Fuma confirmed "okay?"

"Yeah okay..."

Harua stood in the sterile white room, his heart pounding against his chest as he stared at the medical equipment laid out in front of him. With a reassuring smile, K stepped forward and gently took Harua's trembling hand in his own. He helped him sit on the counter where the nurse told them to sit.

"You're going to be okay, Harua. I'm right here, I'm not going anywhere."

Harua nodded, still shaking. The nurse approached, her voice calm and soothing as she explained the procedure. Despite her reassuring words, Harua's pulse quickened, and his palms grew clammy.

As the nurse prepared the IV, Harua's breaths came in short, shallow gasps. He squeezed K's hand tightly, trying to distract himself from what was coming. K squeezed back with a reassuring smile. "It won't be bad, trust me".

As the nurse came close to them Harua tried to back away a little but bumped into K.

"H-Hyung I can't.. really.. it's too much... I-I-" Harua said with puppy eyes.

"Okay, okay i get it, but let's just put your arm here," K said as he extended Harua's arm so the nurse could find a vain. "and you just look at me and it'll be fine, alright? I know how big this is to you and how much you don't want to be here, but I'm here with you and just focus on me and not on anything else that scares you." with this said Harua took a deep breath and nodded. The nurse found a vain and took an alcohol swab to wipe his arm. Harua slightly winced as the cold alcohol touched his skin.

"That's just alcohol, okay" K said.

"I'll countdown from three alright?" The nurse said and Harua nodded but K noticed tears peeking out the corners of his eyes. "3, 2..." The nurse inserted the needle, and Harua winced as a sharp prick of pain shot through his arm. He bit his lip when he felt the tears coming. K, who was kneeling in front of him, stood up to hug him. He's heart ached at the sight of Harua crying. He leaned in close, whispering words of comfort as Harua's head was pressed to his stomach, slowly getting K's shirt wet with the his tears.

"You're doing great, Rua. Just a little longer, and it's over." After taking the needle out and inserting a little tube, the nurse taped around the canula. "All done." She said after finishing. "That's it buddy, it's over, you did it." K said while rubbing Harua's back with a smile of relief on his face. Harua said as he let out a shaky sigh of relief .

"Oh buddy "K kneeled down and wiped Harua's tears away. "Was it that bad?" Harua just nodded.

"Harua, could you sit up, please? I have to connect you to the IV." The nurse said as she attached a bag of fluids to the infusion stand. Harua sat down on the bed. When the nurse approached him he backed a bit. "H-Hyung.."

"I'm here, I'm here," K said giving Harua his hand. "Give her your arm. It won't hurt now." After the nurse connected him to the IV stand she explained to the boys that the IV will last about 2 hours and that Harua might get a little sleepy and drowsy when the fluids start to kick in, and after that they can go home. The two of them were left alone there after the nurse left the room. "I have to tell Euijoo and the members that you're okay. Are you already sleepy?"

"Mhm" Harua said

"Okay, I'll wake you up when it's time" K said with a big smile on his face.

#kpop #kpoppost #kpop fanfic #kpopfafics #kpopfic #kpop fics #&team #&team fanfic #&team fics #sickfic #hospital #hospicecare #harua #trypanophobia

[jyunshiim]

Broken compass *✬★*☽ ⤷𝘉𝘢𝘯𝘨 𝘊𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘟 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘶

Genre → angst | romance | friends to lovers | lovers to strangers | college!au | uni!au

Contains → implies slight nsfw content

Listen to → Broken compass

Word count → 12.9k

TW → No major TW

Summary:

It’s just the way it is. Fate brought upon such intermittent human emotions, fracturing a person and their bond.. Though it was inevitable. However thoughts dwell on a person over time and slowly sink in, making one question…’If only…’

The warmish rays of the autumn sun beamed gracefully through the towering windows in your spacious cafeteria as you and your friends conversed about your summer and reminisced about the fun you all had. A cushioned booth that seated at least 6 of you was perfect for you and your friends as you leaned back into the booth, knees pressing against the round, creamish table in front of you. Han, Hyunjin and Yeji had been your friends since the age of 16; they’ve seen you at your highs and lows, your best and worst and yet they stayed with you and treated you like someone incredibly special to them. They were the best friends you asked for and they had, without fail, made sure everyone was treated equally with lots of love and adoration. It was staggering to you how you all grew up together and attended the same university too, though it was comforting - despite knowing you wouldn't see them all the time as you would in school - but that was okay. They all took a course suited them best spotlighting their talents; Han took literature with a combined English degree, Hyunjin took fine art with a year abroad and Yeji took graphic design. However, they all pursued something they wanted a career in, something they enjoyed…except for you. You were denied entry for criminology since your grades and entry points did not add up to the requirements so it was Communication that you had to choose because your points aligned with the requirements. The disappointment was spiteful but it was out of your control to change it now.

The ice in your plastic cup brushed up against each other, rattling, as you swirled the watery coffee as you and your dear friends talked about summer and all the things they got up to; Hyunjin opened an Etsy shop, Yeji managed to complete a course during summer to increase her skills to get a job and Han had been relentlessly writing in his charcoal grey notebook with his chewed pen slipped into the spine. The 4 of you spoke together as the ice in your cup melted further before Hyunjin had to leave for his class. “oh yeah you reminded me that I had a class too!” you pounce up grabbing your bag and cup before waddling past Yeji to get out of the booth.

“I finish my classes at 6pm today,” Yeji frowned as she opened her arms to give you a hug.

“oh my god no! that’s so long, you can do it though and if you want us to wait we can,” you offer as she waves her hands gesturing not to.

“We’ll message you later, good luck on your classes!” Han bounces his leg as he waves you and Hyunjin goodbye.

You take a sip of your coffee as you open the large, tan doors to your lecture room before the professor arrives. You take a seat; The theatre was ample with elevated ceilings. It was bigger than you expected but you played it safe and sat close to the front of the room,5 rows up, 3 seats down so it was easier for you to dash out. The faint, bitter, diluted taste of coffee was repulsive since the water weakened the caffeine that you needed for that energy boost for a 9am class. It was completely diluted now and there is no use in drinking it. What a shame you couldn’t finish it before the class. Other people begin to fill up the room although your row remains empty. It was relieving. You gently place your phone on the table and scroll through your social media to kill some time before your professor comes in.

You felt a tap on the table before your head shot up in dismay, your skin going slightly pale since you didn't know a single soul in the class - yet.

He clears his throat. “Excuse me, is anyone sitting here ?” pointing at the seat next to you.

“Oh, yeah-” you realised what you said “OH NO I mean no, sorry,” your ears flared up red but from the corner of your eye the person sat down and put his headphones around his neck. Your eyes scan across the row and there was no one but you and him. Regardless, you embarrassed yourself to the first person who actually spoke to you.

“You seemed a little bit lonely, I hope you don’t mind” He smiled. He seemed incredibly sweet so you let it pass. You unconsciously picked up on certain features like the dimple on the left side of his cheek, his walnut locks perched at his eyebrows and his lips were full and were a pinkish hue like a strawberry bonbon.

“I’m Chan by the way, it’s rude of me not introducing myself and then invading your personal space” he lets out an endearing giggle. Your ears began to burn up again with embarrassment. Did you really give such an aura? your semi dry throat croaks slightly before you clear it again.

“Ah no no, you didn’t.Thank you for the company Chan!” you nervously chuckled as your thumb picks at your cuticle.

The energy you created was tense and you felt nervous but he seemed to be very gentle and calm with you and your nerves. He seemed… really nice.

“and you are?” he attempts to persevere with the conversation. You felt a wave of awkwardness and cringe dissipate through your body before you turned your head to him to respond.

“oh yeah of course i’m [YN]” you nod as you give a polite smile.

“It's very nice to meet you, I hope we can become friends over the course,” his gentle tone sounded sincere and honest, it was comforting and refreshing.

You felt deflated after 2 hours of your first ever class and wanted to head off to the rooftop cafe that looked over the campus, so you latched onto your bag strap and briskly tried to head off alone without any more conversation. “Hey, what other classes are you in?” Chan asks. It was obvious he was starting a conversation with you because he wanted to know you better and of course you couldn’t be open with him just yet. Sharing schedules wouldn’t hurt though?

“Oh, well i’m in seminar class A i think that should be the only different thing on everyone's schedules?” You turn to him leaving a gap in between. He inches closer; “I'm a bit confused about how to know what my class is?” he shows his screen on his phone. You carefully examine his timetable and pinpoint the class he's in.

A deafening silence flooded your mind.

“Oh great! We can always go to class together, if you don’t mind,” he smiles again both his dimples appearing.You nodded your head before he walked around to leave but stopped to turn around; “I hope we can be friends!”

That would be nice.

–

A few months go by. You and Chan became closer since he was the only one in the class that cared about the subject and understood it at the same level as you. You studied together often whenever you had the time and met up outside of campus with him and your other friends. Chan and your friends got along extremely well and he treated each one of them as he would a close friend.

Hyunjin and Yeji organised a small gathering to get to know Chan better.

[Online]

You: I was wondering, why dont we go out sometime?

Chan: that sounds good to me

Yeji: woow this is the first time I heard you say that?! but of course!!

Hyunjin is typing

Hyunjin: Sounds good to me!

You: okie, we can go to the one near my house?

Han: sure thing, 7pm tonight, lets go.

You: that was so straight up but okay lmaoo

Everyone agrees in unison and so that evening you, Chan and your friends were hanging out again. The night felt like a blur to you. A lot happened at once but what you could remember was Chan asking you if you were okay every minute and making sure you didn’t feel too overwhelmed. He didn’t drink a lot, perhaps only two drinks but it seemed to you that he was a heavy weight. Only Chan, You and Yeji were sober, however Han and Hyunjin visited another universe that night…

“Why does my brother have to embarrass me like that!” Yeji whines as Hyunjin anchors her down. Chan helps Yeji put Hyunjin into her car.

“I did not expect him to-”

“be like this? yeah never put him and Han in one room.. a competition every time!” Yeji groans in disappointment. “put the other one in the back as well i’ll take him home too but he’s going to get a slap from me tomorrow!”

You and Chan slip out a laugh in unison before looking at each other, stupefied.

“Well, I’ll be off, Yeji, I’ll see you soon, good luck with those two…” you giggle before waving goodbye.

“Hey, don’t leave without me,” Chan runs after you, the side of his arm brushing against yours slightly.

“Oh, you live this way too?” you ask him slightly staggered that he was walking in the same direction.

“Oh, no I don’t but I am in no way letting you walk alone in the dark,” he shakes his head. You felt his body lean into yours before his hands placed themselves on your shoulders to move you away from the road. It didn't faze you in the moment but it truly did mean a lot.

“Where do you live then?” you ask him, tilting your head to the side.

“I live in a student apartment complex too but it’s not your one, it’s the one that’s opposite the convenience store,” you instantly knew where he was talking about. It was a 10 minute walk from your place so it wasn’t far at all.

The breeze was gentle, gliding through the leaves that rustled above your head as you walked contently next to Chan as he talked about his experiences in his flat - it was not sounding pleasant at all!

“Oh.. that does not sound fun at all I’m so sorry! Just know you can come over anytime just drop me a text and i’ll be down,” you nudge his shoulder playfully instantly becoming bashful.

He chuckles softly, it was the half giggle half chuckle that you found endearing. “thank you, I will keep a note of that. Feel free to ask me out whenever, my flatmates are awful so I wouldn't want to bring you around,” he shakes his head, tsking at the comment he made.

“a-ask out?” you thought to yourself, a sheer wave of panic inundating you. He didn't mean that way.

“Well Chan, if you need an escape I'm always here…” you smile, assuring him some sort of freedom from his flatmates.

What was that? That foreign feeling in your stomach?

“thank you so much, you’re the first person to actually offer that and care about how I feel, thank you,” he looks down smiling in appreciation before he lowers himself to the ground.

“wow, hey are you okay?” you stop your hand before it touches his brunette curls. You inspect to see what he was doing and you feel his fingers on your shoelace. Your body is set into panic.

“Hey! you don’t need to do that,” you squeal in embarrassment.

“hey, listen, it’s fine,” he swats your hand away. You were completely dumbfounded to say the least.

–

The crispness of the air was nostalgic to the days when you were younger, around 9 years old, when you and Yeji used to play in the park together despite your fingers freezing into icicles. You vividly remember when you, Yeji and Hyunjin used to play at the top of the play trail before a young boy climbed up to the top and was startled that there were people there and started crying - that was how you all met Han.November had emerged. The temperature plummeted drastically which was a shock to you yet you felt reminiscent of your youth. The blanket on your lap accumulated warmth as you fiddled with the corner because the soft material was satisfying to touch. You sat at your desk, gazing out of your window on a bleak evening as the sun wanes at the horizon setting to let the entrancing moon set itself directly outside your window, a mighty breeze  perforates the warmth of your bedroom through a crevice at your window since you forgot to close it fully. Your room had the perfect view of the moon, especially when it sat high and mighty beaming its pearly luminescence. Your eyes were almost magnetised to such a simple thing but it felt like home to you since the moon was the only thing that gave you comfort when you were alone.

You reached over to your phone to cure your boredom and decided to message Chan.

You: Hey, what are you doing?

Chan: Nothing right now, my flatmates are burning something in the kitchen and honestly being irritating.

You: Well, you’re free to come over if you want to. I’m only doing some of my assignment

Chan: Oh yeah! If you don’t mind I'll be on my way in like 15… thank you

You were caught by surprise at the instantaneous reply yet you felt gratified that he was keeping you company as well as letting him escape from his flatmates from hell.

20 long minutes go by and you get a text from Chan that he’s downstairs. You take the elevator down and scan your keycards to open the security doors to let him in. “Wow, your place is so much nicer…” he looked around mouth, slightly parted in awe.

You push the ashy grey door to your room revealing a heaven-like scene - to Chan. Everything was a simple white, from your bedding to your blinds to the accessories that decorate your walls. He scans the room; the white, flower fairy lights adorned the headboard of your bed along with the outskirts of the window frame, draping down the sides to create an heavenly atmosphere. Your room was comfortable to him and he instantly felt at home.

“It’s so peaceful here,” he lays on your bed as he turns his head to the window. “Wow, it must be so nice here, you really made this place so homely.” he smiles.

you giggle, “seems to me you’ve made yourself at home,” you say as you push his legs aside so you could sit down too. There was a brief silence as Chan turned his head to look at you with his sleepy eyes, your eyes felt as if they were bolted to him before you shook yourself back.

Chan inhales sharply. “Well I have my laptop too so we can actually be productive because trying to study in my flat is so shit,” he scoffs as he pulls his laptop out of his bag. You follow by standing up and moving to your desk, resting your knees against the desk for comfort.

He leans against the white wall whilst sitting cross legged on your bed. His eyes were fixated on his screen; he was focused and the quiet allowed him to focus. As you sit at your desk, you rummage through the last draw of your desk;

“Hey Chan, did you want a drink and some snacks, I have a few things here,” you grab a few different ones for him to choose.

Chan’s heart was warm and he felt like he met a friend just as genuine as himself, as selfless and caring as himself. It was surreal to him. Everything was starting off strong and you were grateful. Who would’ve thought that you and a mere friend would be studying together with the scintillating orb that gleaming into your bedroom. Everything just felt perfect.

–

The new year is thought to be filled with goals and ambitions that ought to be fulfilled by the end of the year. You thought it was stupid. To you, it meant more deadlines which were incredibly close together from your most difficult units. You and Chan sat at a library, he had an energy drink and you had your coffee next to your laptop, it was very clear that you both would talk all night instead of actually getting any work done. You prod Chan’s hand to attain his attention, his deep brown eyes looking up to focus on yours instead of the screen he had been staring at for the last 35 minutes;

“Chan,” you call his name in a hushed tone. He peeks above his screen and pushes one of his headphones back from his ear. “Yeah? Are you alright, do you need help with anything?” he asked, heedfully listening to what you had to say.

It had been a few months and you wondered why he spent 90% of his time with you. Was it because you were his only friend? It couldn’t be right? He’d always help you with your work and always give his notes to you and wait for you, it didn't matter where or what the weather was. You wondered for a while and thought you’d ask him the question whilst it was just you and him together so you gathered your courage to ask.

“you almost always hang out with me all the time and talk to me and share literally everything with me… why?” it almost sounded like you were putting yourself down and you had to admit a small percentage were the pure insecurities talking. Why did he even like you in the first place?

The question was striking to him. He blinked blankly at you and titled his head, scrunching his forehead as he thought about the question, his lips slightly pouted. “ No reason, I just think you’re nice to hang around, you’re a nice person,” he smiles again. That sickly sweet smile. That’s when you felt it again but this time it was different from the last. The breathlessness, the pains within your chest, the burning ears. It couldn’t be the feeling of embarrassment, it was much more than that.

“Oh right, I was just curious because you always talk to me and message me and wait for me and -” you pause for a moment to see his expression. It was a softish smile, his features so gentle; “slow down, don't worry, you’re just a really really nice person and I enjoy hanging out with you”

You nod at his response. It sounded so simple yet you felt like it had more meaning to it, like an iceberg. You remained silent after his response attempting to process what you were feeling.

“now let's get some work done, we are not good study buddies!” He prods the surface of your hand before your fingers close inwards instinctively.

Your cheeks burn a crimson along with the tips of your ears, panic settling in for no reason. “O-oh um i’ll be back, i’m just going to the bathroom,” you point, nervously breathy laugh escapes your lips before you push the chair back and speed walk to the nearest bathroom.

Your hand lingered over your chest, your forehead forming tiny specks of sweat that would race down your face. This was abnormal. Your heart felt like a rock anchoring you down but you had to compose yourself. you didn't want chan to feel like he was a problem because he really wasn't. He was nothing but sweet and selfless. You inhaled sharply and exhaled slowly and gathered your emotions and walked back out. You hoped Chan didn’t think you left upset or worse, abandoned him.

You walk back to the corner you were both sitting in, your legs feeling like jelly, and sit yourself down in front of him. His thick lips were pouty and a rosy hue, his hair was messy from ruffling it and his eyes were droopy as if he were to drift away whilst he looks down at his notes, hand on head, processing what he wrote but he seemed so gentle at this moment, like a sleepy puppy. Your fingers twitch to move his stray hairs away from his face before his eyes glance at you and you retrieve your fingers. “are you alright? you went away for a while?” He asks with a concerned tone.

“oh dont worry I just felt a bit sick,”

“sick! we should get you home!” he sits up alert.

“Wait, no! not sick… I think I'm just tired. It’s fine Chan don't worry,” you tut, clearing your throat as you sit up straight adjusting your posture.

“we’ll go in an hour from now,”

The remaining time there was awkward yet spending your time with him was enjoyable as if you didn't want that moment to end at all.

–

You were desk bound again because of your assignment deadlines that were close. You rest your elbow on your desk, leaning your head onto your hand as you fidget with a pen tapping it onto the desk. You contemplated the things that happened over the last few weeks for a while. The bedroom was silent, the ticking of the clock getting quieter as your clamorous thoughts engulfed you in that moment. You could hear your heart thumping out of your chest, the sudden feeling of pins and needles in your right leg from the lack of movement. You were overthinking again. The phone pings and the blue screen beams back at you alerting you of a new notification. Could it be the email from your professor or was it him?

Chris: Hey, you haven’t messaged me when you went home, is everything okay? Are you feeling better?

You breathed deeply, your fingers grasping the phone until the little line pops up and starts blinking.

blink

blink

blink

You carefully thought about your response. it shouldn't be too painstakingly cringe, or serious or blunt. Just the regular you. Although you were too aware of your behaviour for you to be somewhat normal.

You: Hey, i’m okay. i think i’m overworking a lot and my head started to hurt don’t worry about me

Chris: Oh okay, just don’t overwork yourself. I can hand you some of my notes if that helps and you can copy them?

Chris: And don't say no because I know you would :/

he read you like an open book, welp.

–

As time went by, your relationship with him was flourishing like a blossom tree on a spring day. Every moment was something new with your new friend and it was enjoyable to be with him. You went out with him, he came over to visit, you spent your breaks with him and he obviously helped you with note-taking. He made sure you were walking away from the road which caught you off guard, his hands gently settling on your shoulders and carefully moving you aside. He drapes his arm over your shoulders as you walk towards your accommodation;  It was only then, when you and Chan were walking back where you really felt something and you realised what it was this whole time, it was like a final awakening and you accepted what this feeling was. You really did like Chan. It wasn’t the typical ‘i like him’, it was a burning passion, a longing for someone so kind and selfless like him, someone who understood you through your highs and lows. Chan was everything you wanted in a person yet you forced yourself to believe it was an unrealistic standard and went along with it. Your heart thumped through your best. You could feel your ears redden from the nerves and coyness.

–

The door to your room slammed against the wooden door frame that had only recently been replaced. Chan crashed onto your bed, his face buried amongst your plushies and pillows, his black cap beside him letting his chestnut locks sit against your ivory pillows. The sun rays beamed in through the blinds that were open enough to let a few rays illuminate your small bedroom. It was getting dark soon. You set your bag on the tan wooden floor although before you could sit on your bed, you had to change. “Chan, I'm just going to change real quick, you can play whatever you want on my laptop,” you point at your laptop as you open the door to the bathroom. You needed some time to get yourself together. You and Chan are just friends. Chan leaned back into your bedding, he felt at ease when he was at your place.

It darkened outside, the resplendent sunset disappearing over the horizon allowing the scintillating stars to adorn the stygian night sky. After you put your things away and hung up your bag behind the door, you jumped into your bed crossing your legs and leaning back into all your plushies and pillows. Chan was closest to the wall, leaning his head against it in a torpid state.

“are you alright?” you prod his shoulder, his head whipping to face you. His resting face was extremely pouty and his eyes seemed droopy from being exhausted. Almost always, Chan seemed sleepy with you but little did you know he was comfortable enough to be in a vulnerable state around you.

“oh yeah, I’m okay don’t worry about it!” He tried to sound somewhat energetic.

You and Chan talked, ate some snacks, talked again and watched a show together before it got too late. Chan teased every now and then by taking something of yours and holding it back, annoying you slightly; “Come on Chan give me my phone back!” you whine

Chan laughs “it’s kinda cute when you’re annoyed,” he says returning your phone.

What did he say?

You and Chan peacefully sit together again, only millimetres apart from each other, the tension in the room rising by the second until Chan sighs deeply.

“oh wow it’s already 12:30!” he leaps out of your bed. “I have to go, I have a meeting with the director of our year tomorrow at 9am”

“oh! i’m so sorry for keeping you for so long, i’ll walk you out,” you hastily lurch out, finding your slippers and a zip up hoodie to keep you covered and warm.

Chan’s smile was only on one side of his face, one of those smiles that you give (or get) when you are appreciative. “Thank you,” his voice was hushed but to you it sounded relaxing. You didn’t want him to leave.

You wave to him as he walks down the tenebrous street alone with his hood up.He exhaled in relief. He felt nervous, bothersome even, causing him to want to tear his hair out. Of course, these were destructive thoughts however they were one of many. He aggressively slapped his cheeks as he tried to shake himself back to what he thought was reality.

You tap away at your phone to message Chan despite him only just leaving. You couldn’t get enough.

YOU: let me know when you get some, it’s really late and dark

CHAN: I will <3

You stare at your phone with your mouth slightly parted. Do guys send hearts like this to anyone? It was too late at night to even ponder about it so you buried your face into your heap of pillows and plushie although something was different. Chan’s scent lingered. A mixture of sandalwood with hints of rose, you didn’t want to get up and stayed laid down on your bed, your cheek pressed against the pillow Chan was laying on as you held your phone on the lowest brightness waiting for him to reply.

Your eyes begin to droop, becoming heavy like rocks were tied to your eyelids before everything went dark. Your phone remained in your hands.

–

Sun rays greeted you as they slipped through the tiny gaps in the blinds gradually awakening you. A small groan passes your lips as you hear the birds chirping to one another, singing their morning song. Your hands pat your mattress in search of your phone; 7:56AM. You could’ve sworn you were waiting for a text from Chan! You shoot up awake, panic stricken, and jumped up from your bed frantically to unlock your phone. There was no message from Chan and you began to get worried, why did you fall asleep without checking if he got home safe! What if he got ambushed or hurt? Thoughts flooded your head until it began to overflow. Your fingertips pushed the hair out of your face despite stubborn strands falling back as you paced the room.

You pause as you see the ‘typing…’ pop up on your chat with him and relief hits you instantly. You

CHAN: Hey, sorry for not messaging you. I got home within an hour of leaving yours and fell asleep really quickly. I can imagine how worried you must be. let's meet on campus? sorry …

He finally responded at 8:10AM. Your anxiety evaporated and you brushed it off for now and calmed yourself down.

However Chan didn't get home within the hour of departing from your home. He took a detour to a small convenience store to buy a simple iced tea and took a stroll down a bridge. He thought to himself, a lot. There are many things a person could think about when it comes to understanding a relationship, whether that may be platonic or romantic. It was a topic that was sensitive to him due to whatever happened in his dismal past thus choosing to ignore it and start afresh. He knew he was insecure and worried of losing your trust or that he might do something to upset you resulting in you not liking him. He felt on edge most of the time though he tried to push it to the side because he knew you were nothing but caring to him although he was worried that he wasn’t up to your expectations. It was a constant battle with himself and he didn't know how to deal with it. He walked the rest of his way home, exhausting himself as you rested peacefully. That's all that mattered to him. Chan is a person that thinks about his actions and the consequences to an extent that is damaging. He is incredibly fearful of doing things wrong or hurting people which explains why he chooses to not have many people in his circle unlike yourself as you rely on your wonderful friends. He couldn't tell exactly what he felt and how to put it into place, so he thought and thought over and over again until it was painful to even think again.

Chan lay in his bed with his towel dried hair and sighed at the ceiling. “leave it until tomorrow,” he said to himself. He unlocked his phone to message you but before he could tap a few letters into the keyboard, he curled up in his bed drifting soundly to sleep.

–

During the first period class, as the lecturer presented the class, Chan nudged you to grasp your attention. Your head turned first and your eyes followed; he seemed a little different today his curls were messier and his cheeks were rosier. You didn't know if your feelings were just making you hallucinate.

“what?” you whispered in a hushed tone.

“ I got you this,” Chan hands you under the theatre room desk. It was your favourite drink from the store you always go to with him, it was surprising he even remembered.

Your demeanour changes. You were excited over such a small thing that he remembered that it made your heart skip a beat.

“What are you going to do now?” Chan asked as you both walked side by side to leave the room.

“I’m not too sure to be honest, is there anything you wanted to do?” you ask him.

Chan thought for a moment. “Have you started the assignment yet? could we start it together?” he did and said anything to spend more time with you.

“you’re eager aren’t you,” you giggle, your cheeks blushing a roseate hue. He couldn’t say how much he wanted to be in your company so these excuses will have to do.

It was always assignments that got you and Chan to be together otherwise there would be no excuse for you guys to hang out. You weren't the most straight forward person and nor was he so beating around the bush was something you both had turns out which began to get frustrating. You and Chan sat next to each other at a table as you assisted each other with the assignment. He had an endearing habit of chewing the top of his pen when he was focused planning and to him, it was endearing that you would do piano taps on the table to keep focused. He made sure he was close to you, shoulders touching, knees touching under the table and faces a couple inches apart. You had to contain yourself, so you started biting your lips due to your nerves. Thoughts raced through your head as you gazed at Chan focused staring back at his notebook. You turned back and felt his knee touch yours, causing you to move your knees together tightly so they didn't hit him again. His company was pleasant.

After an hour or so, you tapped the back of Chan’s hand -

“what’s up?” his face was close to yours and you felt like you could just kiss him right now but you couldn't let your impulsive thoughts take over. You gulp as your eyes trail from his lips back to his hazel brown eyes.

“should we perhaps go now? we’ve been here for a while” you gulp as you try to maintain eye contact with him though the nerves began to creep up slowly but steadily.

“If you want to, let's go,” he closes his notebook and laptop. “do you want to see the sunset with me today, only if you want to of course I understand if you have other things to do,” he scratches the back of his head and lets out a slight nervous chuckle.

Your heart was beating out of its chest that it felt painful but you didnt turn down his invitation. He made a bold move and this was clearly a date! you were relieved that he could ask you out for something other than writing an essay…

“ Of course, that sounds really nice! I’ll go home and get changed and I'll meet you,” you tell him sweetly.

“i’ll come to yours and we can go together,” he smiles as he rests a hand on the side of your arm. Chan actually meant ‘let's go on a date and watch the sunset, i’ll pick you up’ but he didn't try to coerce you into something you didn't want such as going on a ‘date’.

–

You got ready and changed into something a little warmer. You checked your phone and instantly saw Chan’s name on the screen meaning he was waiting for you downstairs. Your hair was tied up today, a long, tan coat draping down your body. You and Chan walk side by side talking about all the intricacies of the world. Just you and him under a setting sun and the potential sight of the moon. Chan took you to a secluded area away where there was a perfect view of the sunset. “this is where I come sometimes when I need a break from everything,” he says as he sits down on the sand, looking out to the sunset looking over the ocean. It was like a small cove looking area that was separated away from the main beach.

The sound of the ocean crashing onto the warm beige sands; the beach was imbued with such serenity within that moment in time. It was later during the evening so people had gone home and it was just you and Chan. The gentle breeze misplaced a strand of your hair sticking to your lips until you felt a finger brush against it attempting to move it away. Within that moment, your eyes locked with his and for a moment you felt the world stop. The waves stopped crashing against the shore and the wind stopped, although that’s what you thought. You could tell from the way he looked at you something in him changed.

“Too close?” his dimples deepen as he smiles at you shyly.

Your cheeks were now visibly red from being incredibly flustered. “o-oh no! no, don't worry” you clear your throat as he continues to smile, furrowing his brows as he gazes endearingly at you.

You and Chan spoke about a plethora of things from dreams and ambitions to your childhood unlocking deep aspects that you haven't told anyone. You felt like it was safe with him, he felt safe to be around. This felt more like a date than hanging out but ‘date’ was never uttered so you thought to keep that idea to yourself except, Chan thought the exact same thing.

–

As you and Chan walk side by side down the promenade, his fingers twitch as you admire the view to your right. He gulped hard before clearing his throat before his fingers slipped between your fingers attaining your attention as you turned your head around instantly. Your cheeks flood a pink, then a red and your eyes widen as if you saw a ghost, turning pale; his fingers tightened and grasped your hand. Your mouth was agape, eyes doe eyed facing Chan as he simply smiled with red ears. He was just as nervous.

“I hope you don’t mind,” he gulps.

You process it for a moment. He’s holding my hand. Chan is holding my hand. He likes me. He actually likes me back. you stop for a moment and you move your hand away from his, now facing him.

“I really like you, I hope it’s not something that would push us apart because I know we’re good friends too and I want us to stay as good friends bu-” You cut Chan off his nervous rambling by laying a soft kiss on his pouty lips. He paused for a moment before he pulled you in and returned the favour. A million fireworks and an army of butterflies set off whilst a heavy weight from your shoulders ascended. Chan moved back slightly, the winsome sparkle in his eyes clasping your heart as his flushed cheeks were a soft rosy pink, you couldn't help but examine his face again and again. Although, to Chan, you were just as entrancing as if you were an angel set free to roam earth. Every inch of you, to him, was like fine china; so dainty and delicate and he knew he wanted nothing but for you to be happy and safe. Anything he did was for you.

From that day, the rose tinted glasses veiled the naive eyes of two new lovers.

Although, it wasn’t official as one would say. Feelings were mutual although there was no step further into the relationship. It was confusing but you knew he liked you back but you waited for the right moment and the right time.

–

You were on campus using the library for some study time since you had some exams approaching. Chan had a meeting prior to meeting you to study as you alway do although this time he was a little later than usual:

You: hey where are you? It's been over an hour. Should I meet you elsewhere?

You: I feel stupid sitting here alone :/

typing..

typing..

Chris Bang: Hey, I'm so sorry. The meeting went over a bit today but if you want we can go and study somewhere else instead of the library.

Chris Bang: the librarian is a bit moody sometimes and doesn't like it when we talk

You: Where were you thinking?

Chris Bang: how about at a coffee shop together, you like coffee right?

You: but you don't! it’s unfair on you

Chris Bang: I’ll get something else dont worry <3

The stupid heart again. Your heart fluttered and melted within seconds of reading his selfless messages. You wondered to yourself if he was truly human because of his genuine kindness and selflessness. You closed your notebook and laptop and slid them into your grey, leather tote that you decorated with keychains that he gifted to you for no reason. One was a pearly keychain with a white, clear puppy charm attached to one side; you saw it when you visited a store together and he instantly bought it for you. However, you were the same when it came to love languages. You bought him a necklace with a tiny bear charm in the centre because he knew how much you loved them so it felt like having you with him all the time. The sentimental gifts were one way to keep a part of him with you and vice versa. You got up from the booth you were sitting at and realised you dropped something. You crouched to grab it from under the table before knocking your head from underneath. You bit your lip to stop any noise leaving your mouth but the back of your head thumped from the collison.

“hey hey, are you alright?” you hear a concerned voice from behind and as your teary eyes meet Chan’s worried face, you feel at ease.

you nod, despite the back of your head hurting slightly. “Let's go before you get hurt again,” he whispered as his hand hovered, waiting for you to grab it. As you stood up, he gently ruffled your hair to tease you a little bit before you winced at him, swatting his hand away. He found it endearing but he knew you didn’t like it all the time so he kept it to a minimum.

Everything felt too good to be true.

–

The weather began to get colder considering it was around mid November now. You could barely  comprehend that summer went by so fast and it pained you to reminisce about it because of how amazing Chan made it for you - not that it usually isn’t but you get the idea. The icy air brushed the tip of your rosy red nose as your hands shovelled deeper into your coat pocket attempting to accumulate some warmth. You glanced to your right to see Chan with his hood over his head, his side profile peering from it. Your sharp inhale caught his attention as he turned his head to you slightly; “you alright?” he asks as he offers his gloves to you from his pocket without a second thought, it’s like he prepared himself.

you nod, “yeah, it’s just really cold and i’m so smart, I didn't bring a scarf with me,” you scoff at yourself.

“hm, maybe you should organise yourself a little more, good thing i’m pretty organised” his honey-like voice distracts you from the fact he removed his scarf from his neck and wrapped it around yours.

“ Wait, stand still for me,” he asks as he carefully secures it, the gentleness causing a tornado to whirl in your stomach. You were bewitched by Chan and his ascendant nature since he wasn’t worried about taking bold steps. You felt comfortable enough around him although your fervid feelings made you feel agitated at times.

You felt agitated because you knew you weren't just friends but you werent dating either so it was confusing. The anxiety consumed you from the inside out even though you knew what he saw you as.

–

The reason Chan kept it this way was simply because he was afraid of commitment and afraid that he would end up alone again. It was his fate to be left isolated from the world and he couldn't help but challenge it. He wanted to make sure that things would go smoothly and that his intrusive thoughts didn't get to him although it was a constant battle against him and himself, attempting to fight for something he really wanted.

–

His scent lingers on his scarf; A light lemon scent combined with a hint of apple, but the slightly sour green kind, with a sprinkle of spice and slight mintiness. During your daze, you and Chan end up at a coffee shop where he leads the way to a sequestered spot near the back of the cafe. “This is my favourite seat,” he says as he places his bag down along with his jacket. Your bag rests against the wooden panelled wall, painted a light beige tone as Chan turns to go to the counter.

“wait, wait for me!” you leave your things and your jacket at the booth.

“hey, it’s fine, I can get the things you si-”  

“nono, let me come with you,” you insisted.

Chan’s heart set free butterflies swarming his stomach when you insisted on joining him. It always happened whenever you would stand by him, brush fingertips on accident, the gentle nudge whenever you look over to his notes or whenever he’s showing you something, whenever he accidentally bumps into you when you suddenly stop walking - a habit of yours you never knew you had. It was the small things that made his heart ache, his stomach flutter and his cheeks burn up by his nerves. You had an impact on him and yet you were left unaware of it.

You and Chan stood side by side waiting to order at the counter. You scan the comprehensive menu that had a million different combinations - maybe a million was an exaggeration. You couldn’t decide between a coffee or a cold pressed juice or perhaps a smoothie? The choices you had were almost impossible to choose from until you turned to Chan to ask for his opinion.

“hey Chan,” you tug at his sleeve, his cheeks blazing red.

“u-uh yeah,” he turns to you, gulping hard.

“Firstly, are you okay, you look really hot?” The choice of words were interesting but you went with it.

“oh yeah, i’m fine! i think the heating in here is on full,” he chuckles nervously.

“ohh yeah, I suppose it is. I was meant to ask, what are you getting?” you point at the menu.

Chan takes a moment to decide. “What do you want?” he asks

“I don't know, that’s why I'm asking you?” You prod his arm.

“oh well choose 2 things,” he says calmly.

“umm I liked the hazelnut latte and the green apple and berry smoothie,” you carefully read the menu.

“Then we’ll get those!” he decides before going to the counter to order without telling you what he wanted. He ordered both the things you wanted and you were left speechless, why was he like this.

During that evening, you both worked on things you had to do for your assignments while sipping on your drinks. “Can I try the smoothie?” you ask Chan. He nods and pushes the tall glass to you. You share the same straw as him, sipping the smoothie; “mm I made a good choice this is really good!” you return the glass with a ring of your lip gloss around the straw. Chan didn’t care. His lips place itself on the straw from where you drank, the rush of nerves and butterflies swarming through his body. To him, you were angelic; the way you spoke to him in a soft tone, whenever you found something funny and gently pushed him or hit his arm he found it extremely endearing. Whenever your head was absorbed into your textbooks or study or the habit you had of having your forehead creased as if you were angry was endearing to him and the way you’d chew the inside of your cheek and had to remind you to stop. All the small things made his heart flutter

–

You and Chan left the café at closing time after spending 90% of the time talking about something unrelated to the topic you were writing about, laughing with him and exchanging looks full of adoration. You never felt happier. You walked together, endlessly talking about a myriad of random things that seemed to be engaging for both you and Chan. It was the small acts of service that would send you into a daze like pulling you in front of him when careless people run by or when your earring got stuck onto his bracelet when he tried to take a leaf out of your hair but was gentle with you. It was the small things you loved so much, your heart physically couldn't take it.

–

As hours passed, the clouds began to appear, heavy, ready to set the torrential rain charging down to  brawl with the concrete and leaves.

“It’s about to give us a rainstorm…” Chan sighs as he looks up before the heavy raindrops descend from the sky. You squeal at the cold drops of water gradually drenching you before you reach out to grab Chan’s hand. Who knew it would rain the day you forgot to bring your umbrella…

“I think we should go home,” you say as you hold his hand to guide him back to your place in the torrential rain. It was rather sweet how during the whole route home, Chan held his jacket over you to try and keep you as dry as possible although it was no use. The rain pounded the ground in rage as the wind roared fiercely; it wasn’t a pleasant experience.

–

The doors to your flat open up and the warmth collides with you like two elements combining; like fire and water. Luckily your accommodation complex was always warm during the winter time. Your hair was dripping in water as well as Chan’s hair too; “oh no, everything is drenched!” You gasp at his hoodie that felt like a soaked sponge, the palms of your hands pressing against his chest examining the saturated attire.

His hands gently wrap around the wrists moving them down, away from the hoodie with a smile full of endearment;  “It’ll dry up soon, don't worry,” he smiles. Even though you both were stuck in bad weather, he managed to make you feel safe and happy first.

<< For Chan, it was the lack of safety he had that made him so unbearingly cautious of you and your safety. He wanted to make sure you were safe and happy with him, it was the least he could do by giving, if he couldn’t receive it in the first place >>

There was an odd feeling in your stomach that evening, something felt like it had shifted and was ought to happen although you brushed it off. It was a typical thing for you to feel when you and Chan were alone together. You felt sorry for him for having to hang out with someone who did the same thing day after day, you felt sorry you didn’t make things interesting despite trying but he didn't seem to mind. He seemed to always be immersed into anything and everything you had to say, do, or show. But why did he keep things as ‘just friends’?

–

It was late. You and Chan hadn’t stayed out for this long since you met and it felt somewhat rebellious, not to anyone in particular but mostly to yourself. It felt like Chan would whisk you away to somewhere so far away, where it would only be you and him. Nothing else in the world would compare to that. You tapped in your keycard to get into your building, Chan closely walking behind you; The sliding doors closed behind you, your footsteps resounding in the hallway as you walked towards the elevator. Your fingers itched but you clenched them tightly, digging your nails into your palms; glancing over to your side, you see Chan with his gentle smile as he tugs at the strings on his drenched hoodie. You press the button. No one was around, not a single student in the building was walking around at this time, considering it was 4:10AM. You press the up button to the elevator and wait for it to descend to the ground floor. “Thank you for tonight, this was the most fun I have ever had,” your voice was hushed and soft only for him to hear. Chan lowered himself to your face; “Thank you for giving me your time and allowing me to take you out for this long” the huskiness was soft and gentle, especially when he was speaking in a softer tone. You both stepped into the elevator and pressed the 6th floor since that was the floor your room was. Once the doors close, you turn to look at Chan; you both exchange a few looks. The energy was tense and you felt like something would happen and it did to your surprise. Chan’s palms cup your jaw as his lips press firmly against yours. It felt desperate, as if he had been holding back for a long time. Your cheeks burn up, your heart races and your forehead forms beads of sweat from the sudden surge of emotions. You froze, not in fear, but in shock. You didn’t know what to do and quite frankly, there was a lot but instead you leaned your body against the metallic wall of the elevator, your hands clenched towards your chest and eyes closed tightly. A million thoughts in a millisecond hasten intensifying your anxiety about everything within that moment. To him, it seemed like it didn’t matter; He parted away from you and let you open your eyes to comprehend what he did. “I’m sorry, I didn't mean to shock you like that I just–” he sounded regretful, gulping so harshly as you watched his throat, your eyes gazing back up at him again.

“it’s fine,” you mumbled, trying to gather your thoughts, attempting to fathom his actions.Though from that moment, it did feel a little awkward and your response was worse than anything else you could have said.

You got to your floor and opened your room with your keycard taking off your jacket and throwing it onto the floor because it was still wet, pulling your hair tie out from your hair to let it down. You turn around to Chan who hung his head low, chewing his inner cheek, his solemn expression making his aura grey and dismal.

You clear your throat and take a step towards him.

“You can try again,” you whisper to him, “but please take your wet hoodie off,” You giggle. Chan’s face changes from a sad frown to a confused expression although his face also had relief written all over it. His eyes shot up in confusion and disbelief. “Wait, you didn't mind? you’re not mad?” the franticness of his tone causing Chan to stutter.. you shook your head.

And so, he slipped his hoodie off his body. “Seems like this is wet too…” he tugs at his t-shirt, the mischievous character slipping out within this moment as he starts becoming comfortable.

Without words being exchanged, without any more time being wasted Chan was cupping your face as his lips collided onto yours. The desperation in his bearing conveying to you everything he wanted. His lips brushed against yours like an ocean on an empty shoreline, like the universe paired you guys together like the ocean and the shore, like the moon and the sun; you both already knew you couldn’t live without each other. Chan inches closer to the edge of your bed. You melted into him, the way his lips would trail from your wet lips down to your jaw, to your neck and back to your lips again. You hesitated for a moment as your fingertips hooked under hist-shirt, halting Chan briefly before he eagerly pulled it over his head, casting it to the floor without a care. Living with this hellish anxiety about Chan seemed to dissipate as if he were a celestial being. It felt like you were living in hell with heaven right by your side. Chan’s teeth nip the tender skin on your neck, your gasp alerting him. “are you okay with this?” He asks with a worrisome tone in his voice. You nod your head, your fingers entangled between his locks, your fingertips grazing over his cheeks and lips ever so lightly. He left more kisses, whilst you placed your hands under his shirt holding him closer to you. One thing led to another as impulsive decisions were made between the two but you didn't care. You liked him a lot to the point you would definitely call it love. He loved you more than anything. The intimacy between you and Chan was all that mattered, you wanted nothing more than that.

Chirping birds sang their song at the break of dawn, the gentle sun peeking through the gaps of your blinds. Slowly, you open your eyes to see Chan on the other side of your once vacant bed. His messy locks lay across your pillow before he turns to face you again still soundly asleep and resting. His fingers twitched in his sleep, his eyebrows furrowing as though he saw something unsettling or fearsome. He did it again, his lips frowning in his sleep, was he having a nightmare or bad dream of some sort? You shuffled closer to him, wanting his arms to go around you again and within that instance, his arms held you close. It was a tight grasp however considering his dream, you were someone he needed then.

–

A few months went by labelless again. You and Chan did ‘couple’ things without the official title and you didn’t know why yet you didn't want to instigate a conversation about it in case it caused any problems which you strongly doubted.

You, Chan and your other friends met up again one evening at Yeji and Hyunjin’s house for a gathering the Hwangs organised since it had been a while they invited you around.

“Wow, it’s changed so much since we were kids!” you point at the new decor and wallpaper.

“I remember how we used to joke about pushing you down the stairs,” Han laughs and nudges you. “ah yes how could I forget, YOU were throwing a tantrum because you wanted something from Hyunjin’s room and he said no so that was your first instinct!” you nudge back. Reminiscing about your past with them felt as if you were reliving your past; you turned to Chan and he seemed reserved, sitting on the couch next to you his head hanging low. You duck under to peer at him though his woeful expression worried you slightly. You poke his shoulder and inaudibly mouth ‘are you okay?’. He returns a simple nod.

You and Han teased each other, as best friends do, although Chan felt quite protective of you at that moment and put his arm around you pulling you towards him. It definitely isn't malicious at all although you felt like the others were gawking at you right now.

Yeji leans over and whispers to your ear; “since when?” although you hush her by putting your index finger on your lips.

–

The beaming pearly moon shone over you and Chan as you both walked side by side, hand in hand. “You know, the moon is so pretty isn’t it?” you stop for a moment, admiring the floating orb.

“It really is..” Chan says softly as he gazes lovingly at you. His heart began thumping aggressively out of his chest, his throat becoming dry from being so flustered. You turn to him, your sweet smile releasing an explosion of confetti in his stomach. He couldn't help but smile. He inched closer, only a couple centimetres from your face before setting a soft, gentle kiss on your lips.

Everything felt perfect ~

The following few months stayed the same, just you and Chan visiting each other everyday. He visited your apartment so often, it was as if he lived there. You had so much planned for the future with Chan it was like the universe gifted you a blessing in disguise. Though something so beautiful blossomed, there was a pit in Chan’s stomach he couldn’t get rid of.

Self hatred,regret, insecurity, anxiety. The whole lot came crashing down, ruining his parade of emotions he had been enduring over the last few months. He tried to fight it and ward it off like an evil spirit but it came back, again and again. He didn’t know why he felt so much hate towards himself, constantly beating himself down to the ground when he knew he didn’t do anything wrong. It was all tough up until he had the opportunity to forget everything when he was with you, leaving any self destructive behaviour behind. He felt like he was back on track. His past was something you were unaware of since he kept it hidden and locked away, confined to the depths of his mind. He didn’t know whether he could be there for you all the time not because he didn’t love and care, but because he was so unsure about himself and whether he could handle the tragic effects of his unknown past. He didn’t tell you because he was afraid you’d leave and that would destroy him, being the reason for his demise.

But it takes courage.

Chan stares at his ceiling wondering what to do after seeing you so happy, patiently waiting for an answer that he knew you were waiting for despite not asking him. He pondered how to approach what he wanted to say; over text? too cruel. Over the phone? too cold and heated. Not at all? definitely a devilish thing to do. He knew what he had to do whilst feeling an excruciating tension in his chest whilst thinking about it. He fiddles with the necklace you bought him and reflected on the time he spent with you. The experiences he fulfilled with you. The things he took from you and couldn’t give back in case you regretted everything you did with him. He knew he was building up his walls again due to his past and the corruption that he, himself, endured.

You got a call from Chan on a random evening.You remembered the date clearly.. The blinds were slightly open as the breeze meandered through the slits into your bedroom circulating the small interior. You stood in the middle of your bedroom, with a smile on your face, since Chan called you. Hearing his voice was like medicine to you, it made you feel happier whenever you had a bad day or something of the sort. You tapped the green answer button and raised the phone to your ear as you continued to tidy your bedroom. Your cheeks ached from smiling so much since you missed him every second of every day.

Except, something wasn't right… Your stomach twisted into a knot.

Chan’s voice wasn't elated as it usually is. He didn’t sound happy or sad or excited or anything. He sounded serious, which wasn't like him at all. You clear your throat;

“Hey, are you alright Chan? Are you sick?” you ask him worried if he needed your help.

“hey, no i’m fine..” he pauses, “well kind of i don't know.. I wanted to ask if we could meet?” He asks.

“Of course Chan, i’ve just cleaned my apartment, did you want to come over? you suggested sounding rather fretful.

Chan thought for a while, this was a very important decision. “I can meet you at your place,” he said with slight hesitation.

Chan had been in a situation that had made him feel like he was a burden to anyone that he came into contact with. Despite his overwhelming, undying love for you he felt like it was too much for him to bear. Not you; the idea of eventually disappointing you with the possibility of you leaving him, loathing him, resenting him because of him. Of course he trusted you so much, he could trust you with his life however there was a feeling of guilt, worry, and an amalgamation of other things fused into one emotion. He didn’t want to hurt you and make you feel any bitterness towards him since he knew how much you loved him. He sat in his bedroom a few minutes before the phone call to you wondering what to say and how to say it but it was better said in person. He didn't want you to waste your time on someone that was seen as unreliable except no one understood his feelings like you did. That was the problem. You understood yet he refused to believe there was someone who did, someone made for him, someone who was tied to him with the string of fate.  He ignored everything and went with what he thought was right; Sometimes following the heart is better than your mind..

‘You didn't do anything wrong’ that's all he wanted to tell you but it would sound like excuses. Chan was too close with chaos to the point where fear and chaos resided comfortably in his head slowly eating at his fragmented mind. He felt like he entered an eternal darkness that was difficult to escape, he was truly trapped now.

–

Chan sat next to you, your eyes glinting in the winter sunlight that broke through the blinds. You sat against your headboard smiling at Chan with deep admiration, just as you would usually when you were with him. He gulped before he spoke. “So…” he began with a hefty sigh, “ I don’t think we should become anything more than friends,” he sets it straight and clear slightly choking up on his words.. You stare at him with a blank expression your smile immediately fading to nothing, the words you wanted to say were getting stuck in your throat. It was painful. You wanted to say so much, so many questions yet not one came out and all you could do is stare at him. “I understand if there isn't much to say and I didn’t want to hurt your feelings or lead you on and I know we did things you’ll regret and I took things from you I cannot return…,” he explains, his voice cracking at every moment he felt his heart break. “I understand if you don't want to see me again or hate me but you are so amazing, someone else would do a better job at being good to you,” he spewed absurd words at you that spiralled into your head and made you feel faint and overwhelmed but you listened because you really cared about him.

“you were nothing but amazing and I want you to know that you have done nothing for me to make this decision,” he said. “I don’t think, right now, I’m in the right state to be there for you, to protect you and to love you in the right way. I dont think I’m simply fit enough to be someone that you can be in love with.”

– “I don’t think i’m good enough for you and for whatever reason, I cannot tell you why…”

– “ For you, someday, … I wish I could give you all my love to you but I can’t help the way I feel and it hurts just as much it hurts you.”

He rambles. He lets himself say everything he felt explaining himself from start to finish. You filled your lungs with air and inhaled sharply before deciding to respond to Chan. “I understand,” you say. Nothing more, nothing less. You watched his expression change from somewhat fine to teary-eyed before he snapped and released a waterfall of tears.

“Please understand that everything I did and I said, I meant with my whole heart and I wouldn't change a single thing I endured with you,” he swallowed his words struggling to speak as his tears overthrew him. “you deserve so much more than this.”

“I understand you Chan, please don’t be upset,” you hold yourself back from exploding into tears, your heart cracking every millisecond. You have never, not once, seen Chan in such a vulnerable state, sobbing, eyes puffy and red. “Don’t cry or be upset,” you try to comfort him, brushing his cheeks dry, even though in that moment your heart was shattering into a million pieces, your soul was crushed and everything you ever feared arose from the dead. Your stomach knotted and your throat tightened making it harder for you to share your feelings but all you could do is force him a broken smile.

Chan stood up, drying his eyes and clearing his throat. “We can stay as friends and eventually we’ll be okay, right?” he puts his hands on your shoulders, gazing into your eyes that were already pooling at the sight of him. You nod without a second thought. This was a complicated relationship from the start but you couldn’t blame him. You wanted to kiss him but you couldn’t. He wanted to kiss you but he just explained why he couldn't be with you putting you both in a vulnerable state. Chan didn’t want to give you false hope but he couldn't help it so he pulled you close cupping one side of your tear-stained cheek setting a passionate, hard kiss onto your lips. You melted into him, fusing your fragmented heart with his as your eyes let the teardrops run down your cheek. This wasn’t a goodbye, yet it felt like it since the dynamic of you and Chan has completely changed now. You didn’t blame him, you never would. Once he parted away from you, drying your tears from your face, he took a step back and brushed his hands down his face and took a deep breath; “I'm sorry, I shouldn’t have continued to give you false hope…you shouldn’t have felt anything for me…i’m so sorry”

You shake your head, tears streaming uncontrollably down your cheeks.

“If you don’t feel comfortable at any point of us being friends, let me know okay?” He still cared about you so you wondered how it would all go from now on. “i’ll see you soon…” he tries to break a smile from under all the sorrow. You nod.

The door closes. As it does, you stand against it before sliding down with your hands in your palms sobbing by yourself, your heart aching from the heartbreak you were suffering. You sobbed to yourself for a while until you felt numb. As Chan gets home, he sits on the edge of his bed feeling parts of his heart empty and void. What has he done? He blames himself for hurting you, for being an awful friend, for being an awful person. He hated what he just created, he felt as though he should’ve kept quiet. All he wanted was for you to be happy although he ruined it even more.He grips onto his hair tightly as he lets himself loose, sobbing to himself on the floor. He needed something more to distract but there was nothing. He takes the sleeve of his hoodie to dry his face before lying on his back staring at his ceiling for hours on end.

You both looked at your phones to message each other but it didn’t feel right.

1:23 AM you sit on your bed squeezing a plushie for comfort as you surveyed the luminous, consoling orb that is situated in the centre of the sky outside of your bedroom window. The luminosity comforted you as you stared at it; despite tumultuous emotions and irrepressible tears you coped, the moon felt like a friend that gave you a gentle hug. You already missed the sweetness that you once had between you and Chan, his gentle hugs especially when he nuzzled his head into the nook of your neck or when he held your hands when they were turning a crimson in the bleak winter weather. He cared a lot about you so you didn’t understand why he halted anything from becoming more. ‘we can stay as friends right’ - those words echoed in your head. You knew it would be a lot for you to overcome these feelings but would he do the same? Would it take a long time? You didn't know, although you had all these questions that were left unanswered.

Time went on.

Everything felt unfamiliar when you returned to your classes even though he sat next to you and tried to make you smile. He slid a peach tea next to you before the class started but when your eyes met it was a different story. “Thank you,” you croaked before clearing your throat. You didn't open it but you put it in your bag as you tried to hold your tears back.

“how are you today?” he asked. The audacity of Chan asking that very question when you were left in tears and pain. “fine I guess,” you lied.

“I know you’re not fine, I'm sorry…” he whispered. You wanted to disappear at that moment but you simply shrugged and brushed it off.

The same thing occurred almost everyday until you began to meet your friends more and gradually tried to ignore and get over the harsh emotions you were feeling.

You: Hey

Chan: Hi

You: how are you?

Chan: the same

Chan: you?

You: i’m okay

*you lie again*

Chan: That's good, I'm happy you’re feeling better. I’ve got a part time job for the summer.

You: oh that’s cool! i hope it goes well, all the best

He’s moving on. A part of your heart felt empty almost as if it wasn’t fully healed from everything just yet but it would be easier if he moved on first. It would hurt much less than you leaving him first but Chan thought otherwise. He didn't want to leave the feelings behind first because he fell harder than he should have. Seeing you move on, to him, hurt less since he turned you down first and he felt guilty for it as if he were a villain. There was more than one shattered heart and only one was healing.

September. Autumn.

A new season and a new academic year approaches which also means your birthday was close by. You started to go into your classes later and leave later even though he wasn't in your class anymore since he chose different units. There were very few lectures you did share with him yet he sat at the front alone and it felt awkward to sit with him when there wasn’t much conversation over summer, only a few hey’s and how are you’s. That’s what broke you ever so slightly, you were drifting apart and you could feel the bond tear.

You walk through the campus and you see him walking in the opposing direction and you pretend not to see him because you couldn't face him but he called out your name;

“hey!” he waves at you, a softish smile paints his face as his eyes sparkle as he looks at you. you remembered that smile and how he used to squeeze you tight whilst smiling like that. You stopped for a moment and blankly glared in his direction confused about what he wanted to talk about.

“Happy birthday,” he says softly. He wanted to say ‘I love you’ but he put himself in a situation where it was impossible for you to go back to those feelings when you were ready to move on. He wanted to give you a hug and tell you how much he missed you but he was far gone from the opportunity.

“thank you,” you respond. A simple thank you and a smile. What more could have been said?

You hoped to be loved by him again although it felt far from that now. Despite Chan saying it wasn’t you, it felt like it. It felt like you weren't enough, unloveable and undesirable but the moments you shared with him also proved otherwise so you were conflicted with a myriad of feelings in the moment. You just wanted him to comfort you, to love you, to be yours but none of that was plausible anymore. He’s moved on and so have you, bittersweet yet something you both could learn from; it was just an instance of being the right person at the wrong time. From being someone you thought you’d be close to forever, you both seemed to have turned into strangers instead.

You lied again, you didn’t stay as friends anymore. Time found a way to rupture the bond you had left hanging by a strong and eradicated what was left. You missed him and every moment you spent with him from start to finish and despite the harrowing emotional warfare you met along the way, you missed Chan’s sweetness. His pureness and honesty was something you appreciated since he went above and beyond to make you feel as happy as possible but one wrong idea cast the relationship into ruin.

#bangchan #chan stray kids #collegeau #straykidsfanfic #straykidsau #jyp stray kids #straykids #skz angst #skzchan #skz college au #skzhan #skzhyunjin #itzyyeji #angst au #kpop angst #kpopfic #friends to lovers #friends to strangers #friends to more #skz au #kpopfanfictiom #kpopau #college and university #universityau #skz imagines #skzfluff #stay skz

[skztword]

Wait wow wait wait can I request 39 with Lee Seungmin and ler Minho? ❤️

Say it now!

Line="Say it"

As the both of them are known for their cat and mouse relationship, Seungmin tends to be the one who provokes the so called evil cat out of boredom.But one day Lee Know decides that the poor puppy needs to learn a lesson.

As every other day, Seungmin has decided to bother the older member who seemed to be busy on his phone talking to stays on an app called bubble.Minho was too busy to notice the younger approaching him since he was focused on typing and sending voice messages to his fans.

"Hi guys~ what are you doing??" Minho recorded as he sent the voice message to his fans.Seungmin smiled as he seemed to come up with a oh so evil idea to embarrass his hyung while he was sending his messages to their fans.

Seungmin slowly and quietly approached the dancer from behind to not get noticed by the older member while he reached his arm out towards his sides.Minho didn't seem to notice as he was still recording another message to stays.

"I ate bibimbap tod-AH!" Minho shrieked as he jumped up from the sudden squeeze he felt on his sides while accidentally pressing the send button on bubble, which now meant that all stays could hear the embarrassing shriek Minho yelled out.He quickly unseeded the message but already few of the stays seemed to hear it.His face flushed red while reading the messages he received from stays. 『Aw~ that was cute!』『What was that shriek? that was so cute~!』and so on.

Seungmin laughed triumphantly as he saw the evil bunny easily turn into a literal tomato within seconds.But soon his laughter stopped as he was talked down by the dancer to the ground.

"Why did you do that!?" Minho yelled still with faint blush on his face as he glared down at the younger member."What? it was fun" Seungmin cheekily commented as he smirked back at the older member."Apologize!" Minho replied as he raised his eyebrows towards Seungmin indicating that he was angry.Seungmin on the other didn't seem to care still triumph about his little accomplishment.

"Why are you still smiling Seungmin?" Minho asked with a glare.Seungmin shrugged as he replied "It was funny, and hey stays seemed to like it too!"The comment seemed to make the evil bunny flustered again wich caused the puppy's smile to grow bigger.

"You know what you need to get punished until you apologize." The dance commented as he pulled up the vocalist's arms up easily."Oh? what are you going to do? Yell at me?" Seungmin replied cockily as he rolled his eyes."Come on you know I'm not going to apologize."The older member just smirked at the younger member's reaction as he freed one of his arms using one arm to pin both of the vocalists arm up."I knew you were going to say that Minnie, unfortunately for you I have the perfect punishment for you~".

Minho smirked as he dug into the vocalist's ribs causing him to burst into a fit of giggles as he tried to pull aways from the older's fingers."Wahahait! Nohoho! pleaheahse!"Seungmin's giggles sound turned into laughter as the dancer started to lightly squeeze his sides while going under his shirt."Please what Minnie? If you want me to stop you know what to do~"

Now it was Minho's turn to smirk as Seungmin blushed still trying to desperately wiggle aways from the unbearable sensation that he could get aways from.Seungmin knew that Lee Know was one of the most skilled lers in Straykids since he used to "punish" the other younger members by using this method but it actually has been a while since Lee Know has done that to him after Seungmin started to be more independent.

As if Minho read Seungmin's mind he commented, "Been a while since I tickled you shitless huh?I guess it's been too long since you've been bugging me all the time, I guess I got to do this more often... not that I really mind." If it was possible Seungmin blushed deeper now trying to hide his face with his arms as he laughed his head off.

"ShUHUHUT UHUHUP!!" Seungmin laughed as he tried to push off the dancer's hand now attacking his hips wich seemed to drive him crazy." Come on Minnie~ Say it!".

"FIHIHIHINE! I'M SOHOHOHOHORY NOHOHOW STHAHAP!" Seungmin yelled as he was now unable to bear the tickling sensation from the older member.Minho smirked triumphantly as he stopped and got off the younger member.

"Learned a lesson Seungmin~?" Minho asked as he smiled looking down to the younger member now curled up still lightly giggling."Yeah yeah... now leave me alone...." 

"Hm...you could bug me all you want I won't mind tickling you shitless again" Minho commented as he smirked and walked back to his original spot to talk to stays again now trying to explain why he has shrieked in the first place.

On the other hand Seungmin was still a flustered mess from both the tickling and the comment that the dancer has made.From the so called "punishment" Minho gave to Seungmin, the vocalist decided to get a little break and go back to his room but then again he came up with another brilliant idea to bother the evil bunny.Obviously no "punishment" from Minho was going to stop the sneaky puppy to bother poor bunny, not that he minded the punishment though.....

#straykids #straykidsfic #skz #skzfic #ticklefic #skzticklefic #straykidsticklefic #straykidstickle #skztickle #tickle #tickling #Lerminho #leeseugming #straykidsler #straykidslee #kpoptickle #kpop #kpopticklefic #kpopfic #stray kids #stray kids tickle #skz tickle #Kpop tickle

[yeeehwa]

Dance Practice - (c.sn x reader x k.hj) nsfw

Summary: After making eyes at San during dance practice, your boyfriend, Hongjoong, gets jealous and decides to punish you.

Genre and Warnings: threesome. smut. fem pronouns for reader. unprotected sex. one shot. oral. light dirty talk.

Word Count: 1,649

Note: This is my first ever smut that I've written. Also this fic is not meant to represent or bring harm to any of Ateez in any way, shape or form.

You sat behind the camera in the practice room as the members of Ateez filmed one of their dance practice videos for Atinys. Your head was buried in your laptop and textbooks as the staff set up lighting and the members stretched. You looked up towards the members and locked eyes with your boyfriend, Kim Hongjoong. He winked at you, then his attention was pulled but Wooyoung, who had decided to take the moment to make kissy faces at him. It caused you to giggle while Hongjoong turned to scold him.

Your phone buzzed on the table a few minutes later, you trying to dive back into studying. 

Joongie <3: Better keep those eyes on me

You smiled and rolled your eyes, deciding to put your phone face down on the table, and looked back at your laptop.

The staff called the members to attention and motioned for the boys to get into position, which they did. Music started playing, and the beginning of Firework started.

You pulled your head out of your studies for a moment, deciding to watch their first run through of the dance. This was the first time you’ve seen this choreography from start to finish.

You smiled as Seonghwa and Yeosang did their parts, and then there was San. With the sensual little sway, him rubbing his hands together, combined with him biting his lip had you almost drooling, your eyes not leaving him.

You knew in the back of your mind that Hongjoong would be pissed if he realized you were making eyes at one of the other members, but there was something about San that was hitting you hard today. Maybe it was the muscle shirt he was wearing, showing his arms in all their buff glory, and the duality he seems to have, and playing up lately.

Once the first shot was done, the members surrounded a monitor that showed their record, watching the playback. You grabbed your phone, determined to send a quick text to HongJoong.

Y/N: You better tell San to stop.

You saw him reach into his pocket and look at his phone, a small smirk growing on his face as he read your text. He pocketed his phone and leaned over to San, whispering something into the younger man's ear.

San smirked along with HongJoong and nodded. You knew, at this moment, you fucked up.

The next run through, San was determined to stare deep into your soul as he bit hit bottom lip and stuck his tongue out of the corner of his mouth. Your eyes never left his mouth after that.

Hongjoong noticed the attention you were giving San and smiled. It wasn’t his usual cute smile, but the sadistic one he used when punishing you in the bedroom. You didn’t notice, as you had your eyes trained on the pink haired man.

***

Your phone buzzed once again as all of  Ateez was slowly saying their goodbyes and leaving the studio. The staff had already left, satisfied that they got a good recording of the dance.

Joongie <3: Stay here once everyone leaves. You and I need to have a chat.

I’m in trouble. You thought to yourself. You shut down your laptop, closed it, and started shoving it, and your textbooks into your bag. Mingi came over to give you a hug and say goodbye, and you saw over his shoulder, the two men who, during this rehearsal, became the bane of your existence, with their backs to you, talking.

“Bye Mingi!” You almost yelled, trying to get the attention of Hongjoong. “Have a good night! Be safe getting  back to the dorms!” You saw Hongjoong scowl out of the corner of your eye.

Once the last of the members had left, Hongjoong came up to stand in front of you, arms crossed and a pissed off look on his face.

“Now jagiya,” he started. His hand gripped your chin, making you look up at him. “You know how I feel about you looking at other people. Especially when they’re my friends.” He cooed this at you, while the grip on your chin tightened. 

He clicked his tongue at you in disappointment. “You know what I have to do now.” He crouched in front of you, his hand pushing the white hair that had fallen in front of his face back, his grip on your chin never wavering. He smirked at you and cocked his head to the side, his eyes burning holes into you.

“On your knees,” he stood up and moved back from you, allowing you space. 

Your eyes darted from him to San, who stood in the corner of the room, watching intensely. “San’s still here.”

“I know. I told him to stay.” He smirked down at you. “If you like watching other men, I bet other men like watching you.” He clicked his tongue again. “You know I don’t like repeating myself. On your knees.”

Your eyes widened as you slowly sunk to your knees from the chair you were on, eyes darting between the two men in the room.

“You see,” Hongjoong started, addressing San this time. “I have to keep my eyes on her, or else hers wander. I can’t have that, now can I?” He gripped your hair in his fist, making you look up at him. “You have to punish her if she gets out of line.”

“Is that so?” San’s voice came from the other side of the room. You dared to look at him, the grip in your hair tightening and your eyes went back to Hongjoong. 

“Be good for Master,” he cooed at you, his other hand going to the tent in his sweatpants. “Open your mouth.”

You obeyed, eyes trained on your boyfriend as he pulled his cock out of his pants. “Good pet,” he purred, and shoved his cock in your mouth.

The grip on your hair tightened even more as he fucked your mouth, feeling the tip of his dick hit the back of your throat and feeling you gag around him. Tears ran down your face as he mercilessly fucked your mouth. Drool ran down your chin as Hongjoong relentlessly pounded into his mouth.

“You better swallow all of it y/n” he grunted out as he released into your mouth. You eagerly drank all his seed.

He pulled his dick out of your mouth once he was finished. “Open,” he commanded. You opened your mouth, proving you swallowed it all.

“Good pet,” he released the grip he had in your hair, and ran his hand down the side of your face. He smiled down at you, pride shining in his eyes. 

“Can I have a turn?” San asked, his hand rubbing his hard on through his pants.

Hongjoong turned towards San and beckoned him over with his finger. “You know I don’t normally share, but I don’t think y/n has learned her lesson.” He went to sit on the couch behind you, legs spread and arms resting on the back of the couch. “Help yourself.” He leveled you with a stare. “Strip.” He commanded. “Both of you.”

You stared at him with wide eyes. “A-are you sure?” you questioned him.

He leaned down towards you, elbows resting on his knees, fingers laced together with his chin resting on them. “I said. . . strip.”

You quickly did as told, San following behind you. “If I didn’t know any better,” Hongjoong teased, “I would say you’re soaking wet right now Y/N.” He looked to San. “Check for me Sannie.”

San slowly approached you from behind, sinking to his knees as he got behind you. His fingers went to your pussy, confirming Honjoongs suspicions. San moaned at the feeling of your juices running over his fingers. He brought his fingered up to your lips. 

“Suck” Hongjoong commanded. You opened your mouth and San shoved his fingers in your mouth. Your tongue played with his fingers, sucking your juices off of his fingers.

Hongjoong smirked and leaned back in the chair again. “Fuck her.”

San took your arms and locked them behind your back as he shoved his dick into you. You cried out at the sudden intrusion, the initial pain turning into pure pleasure.

“You like that, don’t you pet?” Hongjoong asked you. “You like when Sannie fucks you while I watch?” Your eyes started to close in pleasure as San fucked hard up into you, a moan escaped you in response to Hongjoongs question.

“Open your eyes” San whispered in your ear, taking on a more dominant tone than you’ve ever heard from him. Your eyes snapped open, as Hongjoon sunk down next to you, hand bracketing your throat and squeezing. 

“Watch,” Hongjoong purred in your ear. “Watch as Sannies dick fucks your tight pussy.” You listened, watching as Sans dick rutted in and out of you, your juices running down the inside of your thighs. 

San moaned into your ear, gruning out a “gonna cum” loud enough for you and Hongjoong to hear. 

“You’ve done so well, pet,” HOngjoon said to you. “As a reward, you can choose where he comes.”

“Inside,” you groan out, the tightness in your stomach about to burst.

San cried out as he coated your insides with his seed, you following him over the edge close behind him. You slumped to the ground as San pulled out of you, suddenly overtaken with a wave of tired.

“You did so good jagiya,” Hongjoong whispered in your ear, a proud look on his face. He grabbed his sweatshirt and pulled it over you. He gathered your discarded clothes and slub your backpack over his shoulder before he scooped you up. “Lets go home.”

He turned to San. “If you want a round two, you know what to do.” He wink at the younger man, and walked out the door with you in his arms.

#ateez smut #hongjoong x reader #hongjoong x y/n #ateez fic #kpopfic #hongjoong fic #san x reader #san x y/n #100 notes #Ateez #ateez imagines #ateez oneshot #ateez fanfic #san fic #san oneshot #hongjoong oneshot #hongjoong smut #hongjoong scenarios #san smut #san scenarios #dom!hongjoong #sub!reader #switch!san #200 notes

[lololololchips]

could do some ateez ot8 boyfriend texts?? thank you so much 🩷🩷

I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS OMGGGG!!!!

finally it’s time for my babies hehe here you go:))

boyfriend texts w/ || ATEEZ

genre: fake texts, one shot au, fluff, idol!bf

warnings: kys jokes, cursing, fem pronouns, nsfw

#ateez hongjoong #ateez seonghwa #ateez yunho #ateez yeosang #ateez san #ateez mingi #ateez wooyoung #ateez jongho #ateez fake texts #ateez social media au #ateez smau #ateez fluff #ateez one shot smau #ateez one shot au #hongjoong smau #choi san smau #seonghwa smau #mingi smau #yunho smau #wooyoung smau #yeosang smau #jongho smau #kpop one shot smau #kpop smau #kpoptexts #kpop social media au #kpopsmau #kpopfics #kpopfanfics #🐾

[a-casual-kpopfan]

Happy - JiU

A/N: Hey boos, let's put a little quick fic before I start dropping larger contents. Let this be my entrance fic to Dreamcatcher. (:

~~~~~~

1:00 AM

It was silent down the halls of your apartment, nothing but the sound of your footsteps and keys jingling in your hands. Another late night in the office. Your boss demanded you finish multiple contracts for projects that weren’t going to take place until next week.

You sigh, a few steps away from your front door, and take out your keys. Your fingers fumble through each ring, looking for the right key before you try putting one through the lock. Once upon reaching it, you struggle to find the right key that fits the slit in the lock. “God damn it.” After a minute of mumbling to yourself, you finally open the door. As your door creaks open, the exhaustion suddenly crashes down, urging you towards the couch, but it suddenly dissipates when you spot a pair of flats, and a long black jacket hung on the wall.

"She's home?" A relieved smile appears on your face, and you softly chuckle to yourself as you hang your coat beside hers.

Locking the door behind you, a tiny pattering of feet could be heard. Before you know it, a tiny white ball of fluff comes waddling towards you. “Hi Cherry!” You take your shoes off and set your little bag to the side before picking up Cherry who immediately started licking your cheek.

“Hey, hey, I missed you too.” You chuckle at the excessive amount of licking as you set Cherry back down and kneel in front of her. “Is mommy home?” You ask quietly, scratching Cherry's neck as she licks your arms. After a few more moments of playing, you feel Cherry nudge your hand before walking towards your bedroom.

As expected, the little furball stops and sits in front of your bedroom door. “Thank you, Cherry." you smile, patting her head before you slowly open your bedroom door to see a huge lump under the blankets, hearing a low growling sound. “Mommy was always such a snorer, right Cherry?” You look down to the dog, smiling with her tongue out.

“You hungry?”

Cherry stood up from her sitting position and began walking over to her feeding bowl and sat next to it. You smile in entertainment as you walk over to the little dog who is patiently waiting for her food. You walk over to a huge bag that’s leaning against the wall, opening the top of it, and pulling out a cup that’s already in there, already pre-scooped for Cherry.

“Here you go girl.” Pouring the food into the bowl, Cherry almost immediately chowing down on the food. With that you finally decided to wash up and freshen up for bed as it was already late, but thankful that you got the weekend off.

~~~~~

After a good shower and change into some comfortable clothes, you slowly walk in the bedroom, trying to avoid waking up your snoring lover. Slowly making your way around the bed, you gently pick up the blanket and try slipping in.

“What took you so long, honey?”

You flinch, not expecting the blonde sunshine to still be awake. “I thought you were asleep already babe.” Coming to your senses, continuing to get in bed and eventually lay down next to your beloved Minji.

“I couldn’t feel your warmth, it’s uncomfortable without you here.” Minji’s eyes open and the two of you make eye contact, almost immediately Minji grabs you and holds you in her arms. “I missed you a lot, honey.” You smile hearing that from her, Minji and her group just returned from a world tour.

It’s been nearly a month since the last time you saw her, you felt empty without her at home. “I missed you a lot too.” You turn yourself and embrace Minji in your arms like how she’s holding you.

“How was your tour?” You were tired, you wanted to sleep, nothing would have stopped you on a normal day from sleeping, although it’s not a normal day for you.

Today is the first day in weeks that you’re being held by the love of your life.

“It went amazing. I just wish you were there with us the whole time.”

“We’re together now, babe.”

Minji embraces you a little tighter, moving one hand from your back to the top of your head so she can start playing with your hair. It was soothing, alluring even, this was the most relaxed you have felt for a month since Minji left on tour. Being home alone for the first time in a long time was different than having a whole other human being with you, even Cherry left on tour.

“How was work today, honey?”

You knew Minji was tired, she was clearly jetlagged seeing how she was knocked out by the time you got home. It warms your heart that she’s staying awake willing to hear about your day.

“My boss is still an ass, micromanaging all of us in the office” You were able to groan out as your eyes closed, your arms slowly slithering around Minji’s torso, engulfing her in a cuddle session that would eventually last all night. "The only thing stopping me from leaving the job is the good pay...."

“You know I can handle the bills honey. I did get this apartment on my own before you came into my life” Minji says, feeling like you overwork yourself too much to provide for the both of you when she clearly is able to as well. “You work just as much or more than me honey, you’re in front of audiences every other day, I just hide in an office.” You look up to Minji with a little smile, yes you hate your job but the reason why you work is what makes you happy.

As Minji pecks your lips, “It’ll be nice to have a house husband though, at least I have something to look forward to every night.” Realizing what had said, your eyes shot open, and you sat up but stayed eye contact with her. “H-Husband?” And it was at this moment, Minji knew… She spilled the beans. “I-Ye-Wait! Pretend I didn’t say that!” Minji skyrockets up to a sitting position, her cheeks becoming flustered red, she’s shaking her head and hands trying to deny the fact, she did say “husband”.

After the first few seconds of shock, you slowly, but seriously consider the option of becoming a house husband. You were always the one to cook and clean the apartment anyways, since JiU was usually busy with her schedule.

But one thing did strike you.

“I thought I had to ask you first?” And that’s when Minji became silent, looking away from you. The face of hiding something, you knew Minji was thinking of something. “Babe, is something wrong?” You give a slight smirk to her, making her feel flustered. “N-Nothing honey! Let’s go to sleep!”

Minji instantly drops down in, hiding under the blanket, making you chuckle at her goofiness. You pull up the blanket slightly and back hug Minji, surprising her slightly. You get a whiff of the shampoo that Minji used, assumingly earlier today when she arrived home.

Your arm snakes around the curvature of Minji’s waist, she lays her hand on top of yours, inserting her fingers in the gaps between yours. “I wonder how different your hand would be if we put a ring on it.” Minji giggles slightly, thinking about you two getting married.

Her imagination started going rampant, imagining herself in a wedding dress. “Can you imagine it babe?” You lay your head in the crook of Minji’s neck. “A wedding dress… The chapel… Us telling our vows.” A smile appear on your face, as well as Minji.

She’s always imagined what it’ll like to be married, to attend her own wedding, not someone else for once. Minji feels excited, feeling anticipation.

“Hey, honey?” Minji calls you.

“Yes?”

“Let’s break up.” Minji says as she releases herself from your embrace, you begin to worry and sit up as well.

“W-Wha, why?” Your face started to heat up, you can feel your eyes beginning to water.

“I don't want to be your girlfriend anymore." Minji looks at you with a smile, leaving you in confusion.

"I want to be your wife.

#jiu #kim minji #dreamcatcher #fanfic #dreamcatcher fic #kpopfic

[cupoftaae]

Forever and a day (KTH x READER) series♡ boys never grow up. chapter 3

Summary: your lifelong friend is forced to face his true feelings for you once he breaks the number one rule of becoming friends with benefits: dont fall in love. He knows he loves you, but you on the other hand need more convincing of the most important thing: the right decision.

Genre: fwb. Roommates, friends to idiots to lovers, fluff, angst, smut, the whole 9 yards tbh.

Pairing: taehyung x female!reader

rating: 18+ (minors dni!!!)

word count: around 2k!!

chapter warnings: so much angst, some fluff if you squint. tae is really sad and reader is kind of mean in this chapter (but shes just confused its ok!) some suggestive talk but nothing major. i think thats all?

A/N- hey everyone! thank you for being so patient with this chapter, I apologize again for going offline for like 2 months, school and work is so crazy but Im glad to be back and writing. Enjoy chapter 3 and check my page for the previous 2 chapters. I will make a masterlist with each chapter soon.

"Honestly if you ask me, hes not doing you any favors. hes holding you back, he works from home and expects you to stay there with him, like a child who depends on their parent. its pathetic. I dont know why hes so defensive over you, He probably has a crush. Hes not very good at hiding it-"

you stared off at the wall behind your boyfriend, Kaito, as he rambled about the previous days altercation. you agreed to meet him for breakfast at the cafe down the street despite you trying to find an excuse out of it that wasnt: "I need to talk to Tae".

you had tried to communicate with tae as soon as you walked out of your room but he was afraid you were mad, and made up some lie about meeting with a friend. you know tae isnt meeting up with anyone. perhaps kaito was correct about the whole 'he depends on you' type thing, because since you guys had agreed to be friends with benefits, he isolated himself to just you. it was slightly concerning considering the fact you two are no longer exclusive, yet he remains emotionally attached.

"What do you think?" he spoke up, taking a sip of his still steaming coffee, while yours remained untouched.

shit.

"about what?" your eyes grew large, hands resting in your lap as you met his confused and slightly irritated gaze.

"about moving in with Chae? I just said it?"

you scoffed under your breath and looked out the window, shaking your head. he was still talking about this? you think he would learn and know better after last nights scene which was caused by this very topic.

"i dont....I dont know kai. Ive got a lot on my plate right now, and she hasnt even reached out to me about that so" you shrugged and looked down at your mug.

"whats going on with you?" he began, eyes scanning over your slumped frame. "you are a mess lately, you dont listen to me when I talk, you havent been keeping up with homework, youre always busy."

you sadly fidgeted with your coat sleeve, realizing everything he was saying was true.

"you know your grades are dropping in Ms.Daniels class right? you never submitted your final scene for the semester and she keeps bugging me to tell you about it, even though you should be keeping track of it yourself, Y/N"

you sighed deeply before nodding, feeling tears at the brim of your eyes. " i know" you mumbled.

"you are becoming distracted. dont let him do that to you. hes 23 years old and he is acting like that? keeping you from being successful just because he dropped out of college himself?"

you felt like your heart had been stabbed by your boyfriends words. You loved tae, he was your best friend, you spent all night in tears over how guilty you felt about this whole situation. you loved him, more than you had realized, but within those thoughts you also came to the conclusion that all you two had was sex. there was no dates, there was no true quality time together that didnt end up with you both making out. You wanted better, you wanted a relationship, which is the one thing Tae didnt want, and you know he would never date you.

Maybe that was it, all these harbored feelings which longed for something he would never give you. but you have kaito now, and its not fair for you to allow Taehyung to cling to your feet while also pursuing a relationship. what were you thinking? about to give up a relationship with a man who actually will give you want you want for some playdate? get yourself together y/n.

"you are right." you swallowed and wiped a tear, looking up at him. he frowned, "im not trying to hurt your feelings, im just saying what I think can help"

"no, no, angel." you reached over to hold his hand. "I need to start focusing on me and less on him. You are correct"

"can I ask you something?" Kaito mumbled, his thumb running over your knuckles.

"hm?"

"were you and him ever together?"

you laughed, shaking your head while trying to think of exactly how to word it. "no. we were never together in any kind of way" you offered a reassuring smile as he nodded.

"ok, im just trying to figure out why he could be so obsessed with you" he laughed

you hummed, "me and him have been friends since we were little, we do everything together and I think since he moved away from his parents, i remind him most of home?" you shrugged.

"maybe. or he likes you" he laughed again.

you bit your lip and shook your head. "no, I dont think so"

"ive seen the way he looks at you." he went on, sitting back. "im a man, y/n, I know these things".

"what things?"

"you know...like when a guy is 'intruiged' by a girl, wants to 'be' with them." he gestures. "to be honest he does seem like the kind to just try and get what he wants then leave" he added on casually, eating the last bite of the shared muffin in front of you.

you were in shock. Is that what all men did? did taehyung only see you in that way?

"and...how do you see me?"

kaito looks back at you and smiles, "i see you as the most beautiful girl, who I love immensely and would do anything for"

your cheeks blush, sitting back in your seat as your hands fidgeted.

"do you wanna just spend the day together? you dont have to go back tonight, id imagine things are....tense, back at the apartment" kaito suggested, standing up and tossing trash away.

spend the day and spend the night with kaito? but what about taehyung? another missed opportunity to finally talk with him.

"sure" you mumble. "but I do need to head home first for a few hours so I can finish some homework, can you pick me up around 6?" you ask, getting up as well.

he kissed your forhead. "ill be there"

-

Taehyung had been sitting by the lake while he attempted to read "The Catcher In The Rye", a book you previously suggested to him. He didnt understand this type of literature, it wasnt for him. He was never the type to sit and read, but oh how he wanted to be like you.

he lied and told you he was meeting up with a friend from high school, which he knew you wouldnt believe, considering he doesnt have any friends. He just wanted an excuse to avoid you and whatever angry words you had to share with him.

he realized a few things last night, 1, that the chance of you feeling how he feels about you, was literally 0 now. and 2, he needs to get his shit together. It would be hard to just throw away how he felt, especially with what Dahyun said last night. but he knew nothing would come from this. tae needs to focus on tae.

He never regretted his college decision, but he regretted devoting his time so young with some fucking business corporation. If he could chose to do anything, it would be an artist, or something like that. He would love to teach art to younger children. He loved kids and the freedom of expression, the freedom of just being and living. He wished he had motivation to go after what he wanted like you did. Perhaps he believes reading books you enjoy will somehow change him.

or not, considering hes reread the same page 4 times. he looked up to view the water. the way it rippled slightly with the wind. His attention was then caught by a much older man sitting just on the other side of the lake with an easel and canvas, painting. he smiled to himself as he began to think of all the possibilities his life could go in. Since the pandemic, hes kinda been at a stand still. Now the world is open and, truthfully, if he tries hard enough, he could do whatever he wanted. maybe he was too dependent on certain people in his life.

he looked down at his phone to check the time, seeinng you had texted him. He nervously opened the message which contained:

bumblebee: hey, staying over at kaitos tonight. im home rn so do you want me to cook something for you and leave it for dinner? lmk."

he scoffed. you seriously think he cant cook or fend for himself. Hell, you start a kitchen fire ONE TIME and suddenly you cant make dinner.

his eyebrows furrowed. he didnt care anymore if you were gonna spend time with kaito. you were not his to claim. you dont care so why should he? he wants to just forget about everything, the friends with benefits, the dream, YOU, everything.

you had stopped typing on your computer to read his response,

tata: no, thank you though. have fun!

you rolled your eyes, considering throwing together some miso soup and putting it on the stove for him. you knew he was still angry, you hadnt even been able to talk or sort it out, but he was trying to pull some act on you.

you left him on read before getting up and cooking, knowing he would end up eating it anyway.

Taehyung had stood from his spot and brushed the grass stain off his jeans before walking back home. He hoped he wouldn't have to talk to you, but the minute he walked in proved it would be harder than he thought.

you were stood in the kitchen, hair pulled back in a clip and you were applying lipstick through the reflection of the microwave.

you both saw eachother, speaking at the same time.

"is that my book?" "you made soup?"

you both smiled. "you read the book while you were with your friend?" you mumble, screwing the cap back onto your lipstick and throwing it into your overnight bag.

"yep" he pressed his lips together. "he had to, uh, leave early and I wanted to enjoy the nice air today so I stayed out longer. Brought it to keep me busy."

you crossed your arms and looked at him, nodding.

"hm, what do you think of Holden?" you asked.

his eyebrows raised as he looked at the book in his hand.

"uh, I mean. Hes a great guy" tae shrugged nonchalantly.

you scoffed. "no he isnt, hes incredibly flawed, and you did not read that book taehyung"

he looked toward the floor, accepting defeat. "Ok...but look" he walked further into the kitchen as he explained himself. "I cant get into it, I dont get any of the books that you recommend, like cmon what the hell is the 'bird that flew over the cuckoos tree'???"

"its 'nest' tae, and of course you cant get into it" you laughed to yourself. "they arent meant for you."

he put the book down on the table and looked up sadly, confused. "what does that mean?"

you sigh "it means you are childish"

"oh" he looks back at his shoes, deciding not to say anything further.

"you just like simple things, things that dont complicate you. stick to mangas and shit." you spoke, checking your bag so you have everything ready to go to kaitos.

you didnt mean to be rude. but you were fed up. here he is being all attached and in your space again, not even addressing or apologizi-

"look im sorry" he spoke up, voice raspy as he clears it.

you stand to look back at him, eyebrows raised.

"im sorry for being awful last night, it was so out of order and I understand I am quick to act like that and Ill do what I can to avoid it. Im sorry I made things weird, im sorry I embarrassed you and your boyfriend, im sorry for all of it. I am sorry that you feel like you cant talk to me, and im sorry for reading your book, or not? reading it? Im sorry that the reason I was so off yesterday is because I had a dream where we were intimate and it made me feel gross and disgusting because not even 5 hours later your boyfriend was in the room. im sorry that im too involved with you, you are my best friend and you are only that. I wont hold you back anymore, have fun at kaitos and text me. or dont, i dont care. Thanks for the soup." he spoke flatly, taking a breath as he finished then walking casually to his room as you stood there frozen, unsure of what to do or say.

"what the fuck?" you whispered to yourself, trying to unpack everything he just said. A dream??

you clutched your head and sighed. everything is such a mess. you finished throwing stuff into your bag and grabbed your phone, wanting kaito to pick you up an hour earlier, you needed to get out of the apartment and free your mind of whatever the fuck is going on. you needed to just have a nice time with your boyfriend.

taehyung leaned against the door to his bedroom and watched you leave with kaito. once you were gone, he shut the door and threw his hands to his face in shame. he really just let everything go there.

He wanted to rip the bandaid off, he wasnt sure it was the best way to do it but....kinda too late now. He wasnt sure what you would think of him now, but his conscience is now clean and he can do what he has been wanting to do: move on.

A/N: whew. the plot thickens. !!expect chapter 4 to be out friday!! comment to join taglist!

@taebangtanbabe

@turnthepageandbeburnt

#taehyung fluff #kim taehyung #kim taehyung fanfic #bts #bts smut #bts fanfic #bts x reader #taehyung fanfic #taehyung smut #taehyung #taehyung x reader #taehyung x you #tae fluff #taehyung angst #tae drabble #bangtan #kpop #kpopfic #fluff #bts fluff #bts fic #jungkook

[whatsk-poppinhomies]

❀ Synopsis : You and Yeonjun were the power couple all through school, and everyone thought they always would be until he up and left with no real reason. Soobin was there to pick up the pieces, caring for you and the child that Yeonjun didn’t even know about, becoming the father she loved, and the man you adored. Everything is perfect… Until Yeonjun decides to show up again three years later. 

❀ Genre : Romantic Dramedy Non!Idol SMAU (18+)

❀ Pairing : Yeonjun x F!Reader x Soobin

❀ TW : pregnancy ; motherhood ; parenting ; drama ; occasional angst ; crappy comedy ; fluffy ; lots of cussing

❀ Appearances By : Choi Seungcheol , Beomgyu , Huening Kai , Taehyun , Lee Heeseung , and more… 

❀ Schedule : Gonna do my absolute best to upload every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday at 12:30pm EST

❀ Started : 20220729      ❀ Ended : 20220930

●～●～●～●～●●～●～●～●～●●～●～●～●

profiles 1 ❀ profiles 2 ❀ profiles 3

❀ Prologue

❀ 1. Homesick

❀ 2. Disintegration

❀ 3. Pictures of You

❀ 4. The Same Deep Water As You

❀ 5. Fascination Street

❀ 6. Lovesong

❀ 7. Closedown

❀ 8. To Wish Impossible Things

❀ 9. Friday I’m In Love

❀ 10. Doing The Unstuck

❀ 11. Cut

❀ 12. Trust

❀ 13. A Short Term Effect

❀ 14. A Strange Day

❀ 15. One Hundred Years

❀ 15.5 : One Hundred More Years

❀ 16. The Hanging Garden

❀ 17. Us or Them

❀ 18. This Morning

❀ 19 : The End of the World

❀ 20. Going Nowhere

❀ 21. Truth Goodness And Beauty

❀ 22. Going Nowhere

❀ 23. Taking Off

❀ 24. The Promise

❀ 25. Close To Me

(The End)

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[soobinieee]

[1:30am]

pairing: jay x f!reader

genre: smut, fluff, soft dom!jay, praise kink, riding, unprotected s*x,  established relationship

sum. jay comes home late and tired. you gave him a big hug but that big hug turned into a fluffy hot session...

!! warning: 18+ content ahead, not proofread ;-;

a/n: this is just some fic written at 1:30am....

you walked to your toilet to wash up. afterwards, you sat on your bed, scrolling through tiktok, while waiting for jay to come back home. it had been a solid 10 minutes until you heard the keys unlocking the door of your apartment. soon after, jay walked into your shared bedroom, dumping his duffel bag at some corner of the room, went straight to the toilet to clean himself. the next moment, he was lying down next to you on the bed. 

“welcome home, baby.” you whispered to jay, while playing with his hair. jay smiled to acknowledge what you said. “i miss you, y/n.” jay uttered softly. 

you climbed onto him next to give him a hug since you know that your hugs can make him better. his arm draped over your waist lazily, bringing you closer to him. you made eye contact with him and gave him a warm smile. however, jay’s eyes were flickering to your pink plushy lips instead. when you saw that, you knew what he wanted. 

strangely, both your lips clashed each other at the same time. he forced his tongue into your mouth, exploring it. the fighting with each other’s tongue lasted for quite some time. 

after the intense makeout session, you said softly, “jay....i wanna ride you....” your words became softer and softer, face pushed against jay’s chest. jay chuckled and replied, “go on y/n, i’m waiting.” he smiled internally at how cute you were. after hearing that, you sat up, and grinded on his semi-hard member. slowly, you removed your bottom clothings, leaving jay with the sight your gleaming slit. “pretty.” jay whispered out loud. shortly after, you pulled down jay’s sweatpants and removed it together with his boxers. his member sprang out with precum leaking. the sight of it made your mouth water. you slowly let yourself sink down, slipping pretty moans just for jay to hear. jay’s hands were on your waist as you started moving. you moved slowly, watching and admiring jay’s expressions. moans bounced off the walls. “you’re so cute and doing so well for me. all just for me, y/n.” jay said softly. “just for you...” you whined back. “jay, i-i’m coming soon...” you told him. “same babe...come with me, my pretty girl,” jay replied back, letting out a low groan. as both of you were chasing your release, the whinings and moanings became louder. “jay....” you moaned. “come with me sweetheart.” both of you came at the same time. 

you slumped your body on him with him inside of you. both of you were so tired that you skipped aftercare. jay removed himself slowly, while you went back, laying down beside him. he cuddled you and whispered, “thank you y/n. i love you baby, sleep tight.” “i love you too, jay” you replied softly, cuddling him back. 

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