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harmoonix · 6 months

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Nature's Alurre

° Short Astrology Observations °

H a r m o o n i x

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❀ -> Ceres Asteroid (1) at 6°, 18° 10°, 22° degrees can end up working in a comforting space/place for them, something about their work is very dear to them

❀ -> Sagittarius Degrees (9°. 21°) in your big 3 make you "wild", you seek for curiosity, for knowledge, for adventure, for passion all these combined make you fierce

❀ -> Someone with an Water Sign in their 6th house/Moon in the 6th house has a deep love for animals, they love animals and can find a comfort when they're around

❀ -> Ceres (1) in your 1st house/Ceres aspecting the ascendant are the type of people who need to nurture themselves first instead of nurturing others

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❀ -> Moon square/opposite/conjunct Uranus are going through 100 moods every day, I don't think they can function if they stay in one mood because their own nature is to be able to feel everything at once

❀ -> Neptune trine/sextile/conjunct Sun are the type of people who always want to be in a good mood and try staying positive about the things in their lives

❀ - If earth Venus would be described by emoji: 🌍🧚🏼‍♀️✨💚💲🍵🥗☘️ these would mostly be their most used emoji

❀ -> Pandora asteroid (55) aspecting the ascendant or in the 1st house. Can be the type of people everyone has questions about or is curious to know more about, it can even indicate that person who ask you a lot of questions and they don't like your answers/replies to their questions

❀ -> Ceres (1) in Scorpio/8th house may need sex to nurture themselves, natives with these placements can be highly sexual and sometimes can even seek for it

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❀ -> Asteroid Angel (11911) aspecting the Moon can indicate that your angels may protect/guide you through your mother, for some of the natives their mothers could've be their biggest protector, if this doesn't relate to you then your angels may have an motherly energy when they're around you

❀ -> Sun/Saturn in the 12th house can indicate daddy issues, and no.. not that type of daddy issues where girls try to date guys with 100 yrs older than them, it actually indicates issues with your father or an absent father

❀ -> For people with Chiron in the Pisces/12th house, they can heal with music, if you're in a bad mood just listen to some music it may help your mood in that situation

❀ -> I don't know why but so many people tend to ignore "Parallels" in their chart, parallels share an close energy to the same aspects as "conjunction" . And they're so underatted, we need to cancel the person who said they are not important.

♥️♥️♥️Here is a post about how you can find your Parallels in your chart ♥️♥️♥️:

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❀ -> Did you actually knew that you have a guiding planet in your chart? Your guiding planet is supposed to help you understand this life and it's lessons better and to help you in your everyday day, to know what planet you have as a "guide" you need to look at your chart and find the closest planet to your Sun. (if you have multiple planets conjunct Sun then find the conjunction with the closest degree)

For example: In my birth chart Venus is the closest planet to my Sun, they're not conjuncting but they're at 1 sign apart from eachother. That makes Venus the closest planet to my Sun...now it's your turn to find yours 🥰

❀ -> Asteroid Nike [307] shows victory/something you'll accomplish in your chart

Example:

Nike in the 10th house = good job/career

Nike in the 8th house = transformation about yourself

Nike in the 2nd house = your finances/money. Usually Nike in the 2nd house can indicate being wealthy

Nike in the 7th house = relationships/marriage

If you have Nike in none of these houses then look in this photo: Here are all house descriptions for every house specifically

❀ -> Gemini/Sagittarius placements can be very talented in writing, is way easier for them to describe something while writing

❀ -> Mercury in 10°, 22° degrees can have it hard when it comes to explaining things, they may also struggle with finding the perfect words in a conversation, on the other hand you choose your words with a good mindset

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❀ -> Aquarius Juno/Juno in the 11th house > Don't get in relationships with people who seem strict/manipulative and obsessive, you need freedom in a relationship the most, is way better than being like a bird blocked in a cage 100%

❀ -> Aries Juno/Juno in the 1st house > They desire someone intense, who can understand them perfectly. Someone who can be there for them. Don't settle for less. You desire someone who can be more than a lover to you, to be half of your soul

❀ -> Eros (433) in Libra/in Libra Degrees (7°,.19°) are seeking for true love, they want to have that true love like in movies and they really desire it

❀ -> Eros (433) in Cancer/in Cancer Degrees (4°,16°,28°) seek for a nurturing love, they'll love to nurture and take care of eachother

❀ -> Eros (433) in Sagittarius/in Sagittarius Degrees (9°, 21°) seek for a partner who they can share the craziest things with, they'll love if you will hang out with them in a adventure/place where they may like to go

❀ -> People with an Earth sign in their 8th house may have an husband/spouse who can work hard, because the 8th house also represents your spouse resources and the earth signs are usually the one who work the hardest for what they got/have (It also shows deep respect for eachother)

❀ -> I'm gonna tell you that if you love someone with Virgo Venus/Venus in the 6th house, make sure to use words of affirmation when you are with them because it simply makes them to be better (be supportive)

❀ -> Psyche (16) is the asteroid who is the most connected to your soul, and it can describe a lot of things about it based on the sign/house the degree, and the aspects

For example:

Psyche in the 4th house may be very connected to their family/especially on their mother side, their soul may feel safe around females

Psyche aspecting Uranus shows a soul of an artist who is constantly changing and evolving in something better, also there is something striking about them

Psyche in Scorpio/Cancer/Pisces may have an thing for physical touch, bounding, and dedication, their soul can be highly emotional

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🌼 Today is such a good day for shorty astro observations, coming back with a theme that so many of you like it, I rarely post on Saturdays so here we go🌼

🌼 Have a blessed day everyone and I'll see you all again at the next post 🌼

Stay in harmony and peace together with the moon - H a r m o o n i x 🌙🌼

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itsmattchou · 8 months

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even if it's a dream, i like it !

pairing: zb1 maknae line x fem!reader warnings: swearing, broke reader, mentions of food, reader being drunk in gyuvins, english isn't my first language!!! genre: fluff, kind of crack if you squint synopsis: zb1 + kdrama cliches notes: had that idea so long ago and finally i have done it!! yay yippee. school has started again n i am not haply about it

SHEN QUANRUI :: rich boy x poor girl

who's seen this coming? everyone. everyone did.

ADDITIONALLY he fits the secret millionaire trope (my dream fr) but that's for another post

you grew up in a poor household, sometimes struggling to afford basic things

so you had a job after school to help your parents with money

your grades weren't all that good either as you barely had time to study

so now, after graduation, your job kind of ✨sucked✨

you work in some korean bbq shop and the salary is pretty much mid🥰

there was a group of people that were regulars at your store; they were most likely working at that firm nearby and went out to eat here because it was most convenient

but there was also a really handsome man among these people, and he seemed kind of interested in you???

but he always wore luxury items and shii n that stuff is intimidating, especially to a broke loser like u r

until he suddenly entered the shop without his colleagues and ordered what he usually ordered

but BAM when he paid he also asked your for your number and also asked you out on a date

BAM you said yes

bro took you out on multiple dates, always trying to woo you with his wealth but you weren't really affected by it (you know that scene in business proposal? "you know what my love and this card have in common?"? yes he pulled that stunt too. INSPIRED by the kdrama of course!)

IT HONESTLY THREW HIM OFF. but it also made you even more interesting to him so💕

you finally convinced him to let you plan a date and let you pay for everything (it took a lot of convincing.) and on that date you managed to learn more about his real personality he usually hid behind all his money

lovelicky > rich ricky every day fr

anyway you started being gf bf eventually!! he was out there spoiling you rotten and you were trying your hardest to keep him humble

lovely😍

KIM GYUVIN :: piggyback ride

for the sake of this headcanon. you two are legal adults OKAY?

SO you two were working in the same company!

he was the fun and loud colleague, while you were mostly keeping to yourself and focusing on work

you weren't all that close at all, more like acquaintances

but he was very nice to be around, so you liked working with him🫶

as you've seen it in kdramas, the whole group of colleagues sometimes goes out to eat or drink!

so now you were in some korean bbq restaurant (the stories connect😱) with them yay

gyuvin was busy telling a story about his pet toad gerald he had at age 7, ricky was busy staring at one of them korean bbq workers, and you were silently deciding on drinking tonight or not

but as you've also seen in kdramas, your higher ups ended up making you drink a shit ton with them for NO FUCKING REASONNN👹

it didn't help that your alcohol tolerance was really low too

so by the end of the night you were pretty much wasted. but hey, at least you were conscious!

gyuvin really liked you and your shy persona! so he was like "yo let me take her home" when your colleagues tried to figure out how to get you home

he knew you lived close by so he just decided to give you a lil piggyback ride to your home

you were way more outgoing when drunk, gyuvin figured

you were chewing his ear off about some drunk nonsense he could barely understand because you kept mumbling

when you arrived in front of your apartment, he made you enter the pin code and brought you in, trying to get you ready for bed (more or less)

you kept blabbering and somehow ended up crying your eyes out because you remembered gyuvins pet toad gerald had died

bro was straight up panicking😭😭

he tried to comfort you and (another cliché) you ended up falling asleep on him, leaving him NO CHOICE other than staying the night🫶🫶 because YOU DID NOT LET GO 👹

PARK GUNWOOK :: "yes, very beautiful."

schoolmates/friends to lovers? yes very much🥰🥰

and to spice it up you can imagine it as academic rivals to friends to lovers

ACADEMIC RIVALS TO LOVERS IS SUCH A GUNWOOK TROPE UGHHHHH💥

but, this too, is for another post <3

anyway!!

so i'm pretty sure south korea does not have a 4th of july typa thingy

or do they? i have no idea

but let's pretend they do! i mean why shouldn't south korea celebrate america's independence?! 😁

it was the day of that long awaited cool festival yay! and your friendgroup decided to go together

gunwook n you are in said friendgroup ^

so after school all of you met up at the festival ground and started to check out all the tents and what not

the hours went by quickly and the fireworks, the highlight of that festival, were getting closer n closer

but this is a fucking kdrama so naturally your friendgroup got separated because of the big crowd shortly before the fireworks started🥰

leaving you and gunwook alone. obviously

figuring you wouldn't be able to find your friends before it started, you two just searched for a nice spot to watch from

gunwooks mind was just racing because poor boy highkey has a crush on you (and you were oblivious to it👍🏻)

you found a great spot, not all too crowded and the firework show went off

it was really a gorgeous sight. all those different colors in the nightsky and the stars?? pretty

you were watching excitedly, your eyes practically glowing

"wow, look at this gunwook!! isn't it beautiful?", you asked, thinking he was watching the fireworks just like you did

he was watching you instead, a small smile forming on his lips at the endearing sight of you

"yes, very beautiful," he answered, truthfully

HAN YUJIN :: you trip and he catches you

now this one isn't only a kdrama cliché but you get it

off topic but i was reading that book where this happened like 5 times before they officially started dating (in 200 pages) i was screaming because it was so oVERUSED

anyway! now i'm also using this overused thing! yay! 🤩

so idk if you remember but i wrote one reaction that was like "them when you fall asleep on their shoulder". this thing happened prior to that (you n yujin really are a kdrama couple bro)

so your class were on this fun class trip where you were just. walking through a forest.

and the guide was talking about nature and shit, which wasn't very interesting, not gonna lie💀💀

so you were playing around with your friend yujin

who also happened to be your crush WHAAAAAT😱

you two were walking at the very back, not really trying to keep up with the rest of your class

but still making sure not to fall behind too much. losing them would be a big no no🥴

the path, of course, wasn't very even

it's a in a fucking forest after all WHAT DID U EXPECT

so while talking to yujin about something silly that happened to you just a few days ago, you weren't really paying attention to where you were going

and ended up falling over a branch! oh no!

but yujin reacted quickly and caught you before you could hit the ground, one hand grabbing your arm and the other holding your waist

CUE that short n awkward moment of eye contact while you're still in shock

"uhm" "yeah"

he let's you go and you two just continue going your way, pretending that shit never happened for the sake of everything 🥰

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dandelionxbby · 3 months

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: ̗̀➛ Modern TWOW Kids Headcanons

╰┈➤ Neteyam

High school junior - 17 years old

Captain of both varsity basketball and soccer

4.1 GPA, working towards Stanford

Often spends time in the library

Reads classical literature

Played Romeo in their school production of R&J

Has his licence and drives a ford

Models for small black owned fashion brands for a little extra cash

Runs Tuk's Etsy were she sells bracelets

Collect Records - R&B and Rap

Headphones > Speakers

Introverted but Extroverted around his friends and sports teams

Teacher's pet - carries the whole class. Answers when no one else does

Often gets into fights with Ao'nung because Ao'nung wants to be captain of the basketball team

Drives Tuk to school and extracurricular activities

Love to cook, in the kitchen almost every night with Neytiri

Not that close to Jake, he craves Neytiri's approval more than his

Nose, industrial, and multiple cartilage piercings

Plays violin

Has been growing his dreads since he was 7, but they don't look bad bc he keeps up with them

╰┈➤ Lo'ak

sophomore - 16 years old

JV Football and Basketball

2.3 GPA, Lo'ak isn't dumb, he just doesn't try

Made a music video to his rap for film class and it got a B-

Facetimed Reya right after he got his grade, he was really proud of himself

Skateboards to school and practices but Neteyam drives him home

Collects 90s/00s rap CD's - eminem, tupac, biggie, etc.

Talks back to the teacher, kind of a class clown

Wants to join the Marines like Jake

Worked as a cashier at the movie theater to buy him and Reya tickets to the Eras tour. He didn't know all the words to the songs but he tried.

Is outside from the time he comes home 6:30 to 11:00 at night shooting hoops bc he really wants to be on varsity basketball with Neteyam

Always has his airpods in

Records his raps in his bathroom bc it has good acoustics

Closer to Kiri than the rest of his siblings

They all has their own rooms but he is always in Kiri's for some reason

Taper fade with braids

Besties with Rotxo, he talks to him about things he can't with other people

Wants a tattoo so bad, but Jake says "You can get one once you paid your own rent"

Has an Ig with 134K followers

╰┈➤ Kiri

Sophomore

Crochets her clothes

Thrifts or depop clothes only, doesn't believe in fast fashion

Low-key in her Kat Stratford era

Plays piano and bass

Has an all girl band - boygenius is her idols

Loves anime and K-pop - has her Bias as her laptop wallpaper

Anti-plastic, only uses her hydroflask - hates stanleys bc "consumerism has America in a chokehold"

Photographer for the school's digital newspaper

Wears dangle mushroom earrings everyday

Has a wolfcut and red hair

She has natural freckles but they are barely there so she draws them on with a brown eyeliner pencil

She's in theater club and is the composer of all the musicals

Dance moms is her guilty pleasure

Very much vegan and will give someone the stink eye if they eat meat next to her

works at a crystal shop and will geek out anytime a rookie collector ask her what a specific crystal is for

has a septum piercing

Super introverted her only friends are Reya and Rotxo

Always challenging her teachers

Her only social medias are Twitter (X), tumblr, and tiktok

Loves Taylor Swift and Minski

Watches french films and reads french books

Closer to Jake but Neytiri is her go to girl when she needs to talk

Her phone background is Grace and her when she was 3, it was taken 3 months before Grace died

Hates sports, doesn't understand why people are going crazy over football recently

Her walls are covered with posters

Low-key loves all of Lindsay Lohan's movies - she's her celb crush

╰┈➤ Ao'nung

Same year and age as Neteyam

I feel like his family is rich

Drives a benz

going to uop on a basketball scholarship

6'3 1/2 - got his dad's height

Super protective of Tsireya

On the debate team, he loves arguing

If he's not playing basketball, hes surfing, if hes not doing that he's studying

Posts him playing basketball on his tiktok and ig, hoping one day he'll get noticed by a scout, thousands of people repost his videos

Has every pair of Jordans known to man

crosses people over in the hallway

I feel like he bullies freshman boys but sticks up for the freshman girls bc he sees them as his little sisters

Ronal is the principal so he get's good food at lunch

always late to class but has amazing grades

introverted extrovert

teaches basketball to kids at the community center

Throws the best parties

brings speakers to school

Frenemies with Neteyam and Lo'ak

Of all the Sullys, Kiri is his favorite

╰┈➤ Tsireya

Sophomore - 15 years

Post GRWMs on tiktok

Tennis and volleyball

Starting ballet this year

skincare and makeup obsessed

wears her mary janes everyday

super coquette / coastal grandmother

team conrad

Loves Taylor Swift and Lana Del Rey

Priscilla, Marie Antoinette, Belle, Girl Interrupted, Black Swan are her favorite movies

Wears the friendship bracelets that Kiri and Tuk make her

Watches Vouge Beauty Secrets when she gets ready

Her favorite youtuber is Sabrina Lilliane

Thrifts with Kiri

Has a baby pink Stanley and wears ugg slippers

On the school dance team

Has a Jeep but can't drive it yet so she rides with Ao'nung

Carries K-pop Idol photo cards

4.0 GPA, she doesn't play about her grades

Often helps Lo'ak with school

Reads poetry books

Researching to start her own haircare line with the help of Neytiri

Doesn't wear a backpack only tote bags

If she doesn't have starbucks every morning then she'll be cranky all day

Always wears a locket that has her parent's pictures in it

Is the star of all the musicals

Sophomore year class president

Did the best petting zoo fundraiser

╰┈➤ Rotxo

Junior

Head of the school paper

doesn't play sports

The smiths are the only people he listen's to

works at a record shop

volunteers at a soup kitchen

4.2 GPA going to Harvard Med

OCD

Wants to be a surgeon

Manages Ao'nung social media accounts

Introverted, hates large crowds

Drives Kiri to thrift stores, they're besties

╰┈➤ Tuk

3rd grade - 8 years old

Sells friendship bracelets

Went to the eras tour with jake, had a big sign that said "Give her her scarf back, now"

She traded bracelets with a bunch of people

Did ballet for a while and hated it so now she does gymnastics

Spa days with Neteyam

in her "only eating chicken nuggets and craft mac and cheese" phase

loves to rollerblade

Has an unboxing channel on youtube

always making slime

doesn't have any electronics bc Jake and Neytiri doesn't want her to be an Ipad kid

Tuk is really popular on youtube but she doesn't know it

Loves Reya like another sister

Takes horseback riding lessons

╰┈➤ Spider

Doesn't go to Pandora High like the rest, he goes to an athletic boarding school on a lacrosse scholarship

Was really close to the sullys but since his school has a no phone rule they've grown apart

Still hangout on the weekends and in the summer

no doubt he's going pro

Grew up around military vets

cut his dreads off once he got to school

takes archery as an extra class

really good at math

The sullys send him care packages full of junk food

He sleeps over at the sullys on the weekends bc he would rather not be with his dad

Still really close to Kiri but not as close to Lo'ak as they used to be

Loves the MCU and goes to the theaters when the movies come out even if they are bad

Thank you for reading <3

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violetrainbow412-blog · 9 months

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Andy [S. R.]

Spencer Reid x fem!reader

Word count: 2.7k

summary: you and Spencer have to learn to deal with grief without losing your marriage in the process.

warnings: grief, death, angst with unhappy ending, separation, divorce, alcoholism, minor details of a murder, two totally different points of view (don't hate Spencer or the reader)

The set of keys jangled in Spencer's hands, who was struggling to open the door without dropping the shopping bags in his other hand. He tried to do the shopping with only healthy and non-hazardous things and lately he had started bringing some of your favorite sweets, hoping this might cheer you up in some way.

When he entered, he assumed that you were asleep, as always, so he thought of going directly to the kitchen to place the food in the corresponding spaces, thinking that maybe after that he would clean up the place a bit. He never expected to find you sitting in the dining room and both of you were startled to see the opposite. There was half a bottle of wine in front of you, you were puffy-eyed and carefully holding a photo that Spencer recognized perfectly. He noticed that you had lost some weight and you noticed the same characteristic in him, coupled with the marked bags under his eyes that evidenced the lack of rest. But in fairness, he hadn't had a decent night's sleep in a while.

"What are you doing here?"

“I brought groceries,” he reported, though it was obvious. Spencer reached over to the fridge to rearrange things and he noticed that almost all of last week's food were there. The milk was out of date, some of the vegetables were blackened, and there were a couple of bottles of alcohol that he definitely hadn't bought for you but always turned up there. He brought the garbage can closer and began to get rid of the rotten food, replacing it with the contents of the bags. "You have to eat something, there are things in here that you didn't even touch."

“And that's why I insist that you don't bring so much. Don't waste your money”

“It's not about the money. It's about you” he said in a stern voice and when he turned to look at you, he noticed that you weren't even looking at him.

He continued to organize things in the fridge while out of the corner of his eye he watched you take occasional gulps straight from the bottle. Before, it was the task of both of you to put the purchases in the cupboards and it had become a habit, because he liked to make you suffer with the high spaces of the cupboard just to accommodate things himself and take the opportunity to steal a kiss, which you always complained about.

He was so lost in memories that he couldn't understand you when you muttered something and then he asked you to repeat it.

"We promised to take him to Disneyland," you said, your slurred words a clear sign of drunkenness. You were holding a picture of Andy's 6th birthday: he was blowing out the candles while you and Spencer held him on either side, grinning from ear to ear. You had bought some green party hats, Andy's favorite, for the three of you to wear and the cake was a dinosaur, your son's absolute obsession “Somehow he found out they were going to have a Cretaceous world attraction and he was dying to go. We told him that when we had vacations, we would take him and to comfort him we bought him an illustrated book."

He perfectly remembered what you were telling him and a lump formed in his throat. That book was kept carefully on the small shelf in his room, along with the figures that multiple people had given him and with which he loved to play, since neither of you had had the heart to move a single object that was there.

Spencer was silent because he simply didn't know how to respond to what you had just reminded him, but he couldn't help but his stomach turned at the thought of your little boy. Although two months had passed, he hadn't even allowed himself to talk about what happened, and very rarely did he think about your son. Not because he didn't want to do it, but because he felt that if he did, things were going to completely collapse and he wasn't in a position to let that happen, not when he had so many responsibilities to fulfill.

Receiving no response, you tried to drink again, but Spencer didn't take more than a second to cross over to you to take the wine from your hands.

"Stop"

"Give it to me," you defended, standing up to try to take your drink back, but he held it just far enough out of your reach.

"You cannot continue that way"

"That's none of your business"

“Of course it is. You are my wife and I care about you."

Spencer hated the way you looked at him since that night. He felt that you were looking at him with contempt, as if he wasn't even worth your eyes on him, as if you had stopped loving him completely. And now you were looking at him like that while he was holding the alcohol you'd been drowning in for the past few weeks.

"I don't need your pity" you practically spat, standing in front of him, but at a safe distance.

He didn't want to answer anything, for fear of hurting you in some way, so he just went to the sink to start emptying the contents of the bottle. Of course you squealed in offense at what he was doing and just headed for the fridge to get something else to drink, but before you could Spencer got in the way.

"You need help" he murmured, with a tone that reflected nothing more than the desperation he was going through. You looked at him, from below, with the same disdain that completely broke his heart "You are not okay"

"How do you expect me to be okay? I lost my son"

"He was our son," he said, suddenly sounding quite angry. It was so rare for him to get angry, much less when it came to you, but these two months had been too much to bear "Do you think I don't suffer the same as you?"

"No, I honestly don't think so. We never talked about this, Spencer, we just cried profusely at the funeral and then you carried on like nothing happened. All this time you have seemed so calm that I doubt very much that it will affect you”

“You are so wrong. You don't even know what you're talking about. Do you think it's easy for me? I have to go and work in a place where I see murderers and dead bodies all the time so that both of us can eat, pay the mortgage and basically keep our economy afloat because you decided to sink into depression and drink like a barrel without background"

“Oh, do you really want to talk about addiction problems? Because I don't think you're the best fit for that."

"Unlike you, I have not relapsed"

"Okay, then forgive me for being a weak dueling drunk."

“It's not about that, it's about the fact that you don't want anyone to help you. I hired a therapist that you decided not to go to, I have bought you everything you need in recent weeks, I have even stopped sleeping in my own house, all so that you feel calm”

"I never asked you for that, don't justify with it the fact that you wanted to leave"

"Well, maybe I left because every time I come here to check on you, you ignore me and look at me as if it was all my fault"

"Maybe it was"

"What did you say?"

"I said maybe it was" you exclaimed, now a little louder to make sure he heard you. You didn't mean any of that, you really didn't, it was just all the alcohol speaking for you “It was yours and it was my fault that man took our son from us. We should have done more"

“How, Y/N? Please explain to me how you want that, because I honestly don't understand you."

"Well maybe I should have been a better mother, because if I had been I should be dead instead of him" at this point it was useless to try to stop your crying. You were tired, dizzy, and hurt. You just wanted the whole nightmare to end “Spencer that man killed Andy just because you provoked him and you know it perfectly. He wanted revenge on you and decided that the best way to do it was to kidnap an innocent child and then kill him and then simply throw him on the side of the road. He could have hidden the body, but he wanted you to find it. He wanted us both to know that we couldn't question him like that without suffering the consequences."

"And that's why you see me as the cause of all your suffering?" tears had also started to roll down the man's cheeks, who was just as bad at holding them back as you were “Y/N I had to go identify Andy's body. I had to see him in a morgue, bruised and…” suddenly his voice broke completely. He had never told you things because he didn't want to stress you out anymore, but he felt that after everything that was happening there was no point in continuing to protect you “I barely knew it was him. He was completely deformed, I only recognized him by that scar he got on his knee when he fell from the swings and as soon as my fingers passed through it and felt the frozen skin I was completely destroyed. I had… I had to see my little boy in that state just so we both would have peace and yet you dare to say that I don't care."

“If you didn't have that job none of this would have happened to begin with! That has always been the problem, that as a family we had to compete with your work as a profiler”

"So you expected me to give up my life's work overnight?"

"I did. I quit my job to be able to raise our son.”

"And I had to stay in mine to be able to give him everything he needed"

“And look at us now. What of that did we do well? We weren't good parents and now I don't even think we're a good couple”

You two knew that this conversation was useless. You always knew Spencer went to superhuman lengths to spend time with your family, and you couldn't blame him for anything. He knew everything you had given up to take care of the housework and raise Andy. And when there were bad days, you were there for each other, but at that very moment you weren’t thinking straight. Your judgment was clouded by the pressing pain that was building up.

“Y/N, why are you doing this to me?” his voice sounded so sincere and wounded, that even with the unconsciousness caused by the alcohol you felt a pull in your heart. Spencer was silent for a moment, a lump in his throat, and when he finally got up the courage he spoke again, “When Andy died I thought… I was devastated. I am devastated. But even with everything I thought that… I thought that I still had you. I thought together we could get through this and now you're telling me you're not even sure this is working. I try to take care of you, but you refuse to eat, you refuse to go to a therapist, you drink and sleep all day and I don't know what else to do."

"I just want you to be here, Spencer."

"I am"

"No, it's not true"

“I am supporting you, I do everything in my power to make sure you are well”

“But I don't want you to take care of me like someone sick, I just want you to be my husband! I just want you to stop pretending nothing is happening, just sit here and cry with me... I don't want you to support me, I want you to love me”

Both of you looked at each other for a second, your vision blurred by accumulated tears.

“Every day I wake up and I am strong just because I love you. You are the one who seems to no longer love me"

How could things work when the two of you offered such different things and needed such different things? Spencer thought you didn't love him anymore, you thought he didn't love you anymore, and neither of you knew what to do about it. You wanted him to be there but not the way he did and that's why you pushed him away. He walked away because he thought you didn't want him with you anymore.

But those were things none of you understood, and probably no one could. Mourning was a complicated, heartbreaking, but above all confusing process.

And, as much as he evaded reality, Spencer knew that it was a matter of time before you two broke up permanently. He knew the statistics; he knew that a large number of couples divorced after the death of a child and the numbers were more decisive than his hopes of maintaining the marriage with you. So, if these were the conversations you guys were having at one of the few times you saw each other, perhaps the threat of disbandment was closer than he imagined.

Suddenly the ringing of your husband's phone rang and you could tell by the look on his face what kind of text it was.

"A case" you guessed bitterly "It's always a case, right?"

A part of you desperately hoped that he would ignore the message, come up to you with an apology, and tell you that he would stay right there with you. But the utopian version your mind created didn't look like the real situation at all, where he just gave you a pained look from behind those teary eyes.

"I promise I'll be back. I'll come and… we can talk about all this when we're calmer. We can try to fix it, things don't have to be that way."

“But that's how they are,” you muttered, shrugging, as another message rang on Spencer's phone.

You wanted to tell him that if he really wanted to make things right with you he'd send the FBI to hell and stay there to talk, but you held back because you simply thought it was useless to do that. You were tired, so you were just going to let it go; you told him to come back whenever he wanted, without much interest in when that would be, and new dizziness hit your head from the decision you had just made.

You didn't push him away when he approached to hold your face, with a softness that surprised you, and he left you a kiss on the forehead, one of those you'd received thousands of but now it felt so strange to share.

The case dragged on into the next day, and the entire time Spencer pondered your words. Maybe he was right about some things, but you are right about others too. Perhaps if you tried to understand each other things could improve and if both of you reached an agreement little by little you would return to being a married couple and not just two people going through the loss of a child. It was worth stopping avoiding the problem and facing it to be able to be not only with you, but also for you.

When he got home, the silence made him think that you were resting, and he still wanted to be able to lie next to you to simply hug you without saying anything. In a matter of a few seconds, so many nights passed through his mind in which he had loved you, in which you had feared and he had protected you, and those in which you had been immensely happy talking for hours until the sun bathed your face. You hadn't shared a decent kiss since Andy's funeral and suddenly the need to taste your lips became urgent, not to satisfy itself but to tell you how much he loved you. He had been an idiot these months, too busy not to break down to realize what was falling around him.

But upon reaching the room and turning on the light, all his hopes were shattered by a half-empty closet, a bed without you and a letter resting on the nightstand.

taglist: @navs-bhat @reidwritings @tricia-shifting14

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds #criminal minds fanfic #dr spencer reid #matthew gray gubler #aaron hotchner #derek morgan #jason gideon #JJ #penelope garcía #david rossi #emily prentiss #spencer reid x you #spencer reid angst #heartbreaking angst

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nostalgebraist · 3 months

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Can I ask a question about AI?

I'm given to understand that sometimes neural networks (particularly image-recognizing ones) will be found to have a particular neuron that corresponds to a particular concept, like 'dog'. I don't understand why this would happen. My understanding is this:

Each layer of the neural network can be thought of as a nonlinear function R^m to R^n. If we imagine a 2-layer network, we can call layer 1 'f' and layer 2 'g', and the machine learning is trying to approximate some function h as g∘f. But if we imagine another version of the network, with f' which does the same thing as f, except then rotates it some amount (f' = rf), and g' undoes the rotation (g' = gr^-1), then g'∘f' = g∘f, so both are equally good approximations of h. So there's no reason for the machine learning to prefer one over the other.

If the original network had a dog neuron, 'dogness' was an axis in the codomain of f, in the direction of one of the basis vectors. But after a rotation, this won't be aligned with a basis vector anymore, so in the new network, g'∘f', if you want to read off the 'dogness', you have to take a linear combination of all the intermediate neurons. These f' and g' are no more complicated to approximate, so there should be no reason to prefer f and g to f' and g'. So why would we ever happen to find that 'dogness' is aligned with one of the basis vectors rather than at an awkward direction? Or more likely still, it's some messy nonlinear function on the codomain of g, because none of this argument depends on r being linear.

Or is there some reason the learning process would sometimes prefer the 'dogness' axis to be aligned with a basis vector?

Sorry if this is unclear.

Ah, the part you're missing is that NN layers aren't fully generic "nonlinear functions."

They are particular, restricted kinds of nonlinear functions. Most commonly, each layer looks the composition of

first, a linear map from R^m to R^n

then, a "pointwise nonlinearity" from R^n to R^n

By a "pointwise nonlinearity," we mean some function S() from R^n to R^n, such that applying the function to a vector v is equivalent to

writing out the components of v in a particular basis for R^n

replacing each component a with s(a), where s() is some function from R->R

And usually when we say "neuron" in this context, we mean "one of the components of S(v), as written in the basis over which the s() functions get applied."

Of course, since S(v) is a vector, we can look at it in whichever basis we feel like. But if we rotate our axes so they no longer line up with the axes along which s() was applied, then we're no longer talking about what people call "neurons." (It's the same vector, but it's no longer written in the "neuron basis.")

In short, it's not generally the case that if a layer can learn a particular function (f), it can also learn that function followed by a rotation (f'). The last step in a layer is this pointwise-nonlinear thing whose definition fixes a particular "preferred output basis," and the layer's outputs will always look special in that one particular basis, no matter how the layer's weights are set.

(The action of an NN layer bears some resemblance to the SVD or eigendecomposition view of a matrix multiplication, but with the final part of the decomposition set to the identity matrix: we change to a new basis, do something aligned with the axes, and then just stay in the new basis.)

#ai tag

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sun-stricken · 5 months

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Don’t have to answer if it’s not your style, but headcannons for overprotective dragon slayers to new demon slayer gray?

Random person: you’re all dragon slayers?

Slayers: yeah, why?

Random person points to gray: why’s he here?

Slayers: he’s adopted

anon you have no idea how much i love you for asking this, ive been waiting for an excuse to do this, i am a SLUT for anyone and anything being overprotective of Gray

i don’t believe in canon or timelines so use ur imagination

i like to think of Gray as person practically everybody ends up really liking, and a total cat magnet.

And dragon slayers r just big cats. So Gray already had close friendships with them

so when they realized ‘holy shit hes like us now’ their protective instincts went in overdrive

Natsu, Wendy, & Sting didnt even try to hide it; constantly trying to make sure hes comfortable and felt safe and didnt sit alone confused and scared by all these new things he has to deal with

Natsu definitely drags him onto impromptu jobs and fishing trips with Happy, in an effort to get away from people, or just so they can spend time together, the reason is unclear

i think dragon slayers as a whole are like violently touch starved, and thats what Sting focused on mostly.

he would drape himself over Gray when he felt like the other needed or wanted it but wouldnt ask

it helped Gray get more comfortable for sure

Wendy, as a healer and friend, tried to give him every piece of advice she knew, offering remedy after remedy to help ease him into his now heightened senses

Gray tried to explain to them once that his abilities are fairly different from theirs, yes he has heightened senses, but his instincts and needs were a hell of a lot different than theirs; that only spurred them on more, making them try to research everywhere they could about demon slayers

Rogue & Gajeel were more subtle with it (not by much tho), they understood when needed it quiet, when he just wanted company without the talk

If Gray was having a hard time, whether or not it was bc of his slayer magic, Rogue would offer up Frosch and sit with him, offering silence or white noise. whatever he needed

Gajeel probably thought he was subtle but he absolutely was not, like asking Gray if he wants to run errands with him when places theyre at get too sensorially intense

he tried to ask Levy about everything she knew abt demon slayers without being too obvious, when she kept sending him knowing glances he just asked (very resigned) for some books on the matter.

there was surprisingly little

But he made do and probably studied every piece of literature there was on the matter

The others probably found out and teased him even tho they did the same thing (they also probs asked him to drop a list of books for them)

Now, Laxus really was subtle

telling Gray to go home when he was visibly pushing himself

talking about his new sound canceling headphones and then conveniently leaving them near Gray

or little compliments abt how his new magic is coming along, quiet support type shit

also staring someone down to get them to shut up if they’re being too much

i feel like they turned from ‘one of our own’ protective to overprotective when they realized ppl werent as accepting of demon slayers as they were with dragon slayers

Most ppl exposure to slayer magic is limited to dragon slayers, who refer to themselves as dragons. so when a demon slayer pops up, the correlation isn’t pretty, and their actions are even worse

While Gray understands people must just scared or confused, so he doesnt blame them; he has a hoard of extremely protective dragons who think differently

Wendy had to be physically restrained by multiple people after she heard people calling Gray a monster

Natsu genuinely considered burning alive someone who refused to pay Gray after he finished up a job

Gray definitely now had scary dog privileges, the dog being every single dragon slayer he knows

Laxus zapping people who so much as look at Gray wrong, or frying whatever electronic (ik its lacrimas but work with me) device they have.

or both

Them all hyping up (in their own ways) Grays physical demon features when they start showing up

Post joint guild party at Sabertooth: some guy talking shit abt how Fairy Tail could allow a demon into their ranks, how he is gonna hurt someone. They are now guildless and only eating through a straw and a face not even a mother could love

Someone at an event giving Gray a backhanded compliment and immediately getting death stares mixed with a violent increase of magic in the air that would make the gods shudder

Remember when i said Grays a cat magnet? its not just the dragon slayers who adore him, its their exceeds too

if u asked them to list their favorite people, Gray is in the top 5 for all of them

im stealing another hc from someone and saying Gray fosters cats, and Happy may or may not of gotten jealous once or twice over the pets and scratches that were supposed to be his

If Rogue loses Frosch and Gray happens to be in town 70% they’re probs together

The incorrect quote u put is so canon in this universe btw

Gray “Honorary Dragon Slayer” Fullbuster

i have so many more but neither of us are prepared yet

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cherry1sblog · 5 months

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I don't understand why people are Soo butt hurt about asking for Ni-ki smut yeah it's a little weird cuz he's JUST turning 18 but they don't have a problem with making stories like that about anyone else's in the group and we basically watched them grow up too just cuz they weren't AS young as Niki doesn't mean they weren't young not only that but some of the smuts they write about the legal line is even more disturbing and disgusting then just simply asking for a slightly suggestive story for Niki seeing as teenagers (not me tho lol) are doing way more and nasty stuff at even younger. And about that thing with the older members like people literally ask for disgusting smut stories all the time like the members watching you and one of them do stuff or I EVEN SAW A NON CON REQUEST THAT SOMEONE ACTUALLY WROTE AND WAS PROUD OF BUT THEN WHEN SOMEONE ASKED THEM TO WRITE ABOUT NIKI NIT EVEN SOMETHING THAT BAD THEY SUDDENLY HAD A PROBLEM WITH IT and someone had asked Ni-ki to be included in the non con thing and I understand being uncomfortable with that but why even write it about that situation in the first place coming from someone who's been sexually assaulted and abused and harassed and taken advantage of multiple time even before I was 8 by people I thought I could trust like multiple of my one of my brothers (I have 3 brothers so one of my brothers) friends and my cousin and someone who was walking me home a classmate and even my brother who let his friends do that to me THAT is disgusting teenagers do nasty inappropriate stuff all the time and none bats an eye but suddenly it's a famous person and there's a problem not saying people sexualizing him is good or ok or not bad I'm just saying there's a double standard it shouldn't be OK for them to write about the other members just cause they are legal it still kind of weird to sexualize them the way people do . Like I can't eleven open tumblr without seeing MDNI and some inappropriate content about them that I don't want to see JUST because I follow enhypen tags or tags like enhypen x reader (even though I mainly only read Niki x reader) AND I'm one year younger than Ni-ki and my bday is the month after his but that's not important what I'm trying to say is that I have like a huuuuugggggeeee crush on Niki like I'm in love with him I swear (not literally I just have like an enormous humongous crush on him) and I don't think that it's that wrong to have feelings that normal teenagers feel (I'm a virgin so I've never done anything) but what I'm saying is it's WWWWASAAAYYYYYYY more weird to ask tobbe non con by the legal line than it is forbme to ask for something like a story where the reader and Ni-ki make out or some (I'm not the one who asked for you to write after he turns 18 just defending you from the people who have been dogging you for no reason when they probably read TONSS ON THOUSANDS Of WWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYY WORSE AND MORE DEMEANING AND DISTURBING DISGUSTING THINGS ABOUT THE OTHER MEMBERS AND JUSTIFY IT BY SAYING THAT THEY ARE LEGAL? LIKE COME ON NOW AND THEN THEY HAVE THE NERVE TO MAKE IT SEEM LIKE THEY'RE SAINTS WHEN THEY ARE DOING THE SAME ABD EVEN WORSE TO THE ITHER MEMBERS JUST CAUSE THEY'RE "OF AGE" like seriously a A NON CON REQUEST AND THEY ACTUALLY WROTE IT? that's like not ok especially considering people actually struggle and go through that the double standard is CRAZY LIKE INSANE they don't have the right to look at you when they write and read stuff like non con or sleep stuff that basically just r*pe fics

I know I went on but it's crazy how people will dig you and make you out to be the bad guy when they're doing the same if not worse stuff

You ate all of this up I’m so sorry about what happened to you but your a really strong person and I appreciate what you wrote you couldn’t have said anything more fucking true people are so blinded it’s actually fucking crazy literally everything I wanted to say you summed it up

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findafight · 8 months

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key reason why steve would be a better tutor than ppl like nancy or dustin tbh. esp nancy (given how prevalent nancy tutoring other characters is in fic),,,, whenever ppl talk about her tutoring steve or eddie or something i can't believe it bc ik she would get v frustrated w other ppl who are struggling w something she didn't personally struggle w. nancy would get v irritated if the tutee didn't understand something the same way she did and being able to explain something in multiple ways/look at something from multiple perspectives is literally number 1 most important skill for a tutor imo. god forbid if they were neurodivergent too r*nance shippers can lie to themselves all they like but it doesn't change how she acted w robin. genuinely think that those fics where nancy tutors eddie are subjecting eddie to his own personal brand of hell.

I JUST mentioned in the replies of that ask that Steve was a Lifeguard, and almost certainly was also teaching swimming. You have to be able to adapt how you teach something for that, not only because the age range is between babies and adults, but because people learn differently. You can't explain front glide to side glide the same way to a four year old as to a twelve year old as to a forty year old. it also requires spacial and physical awareness. Steve would probably understand that maybe he himself needs to repeat things back in his own words, and that others need to hear it again or write it down or something. I think he would only really succeed or even try in something he knew well and was confident in, hence swimming and the abundance of steve-helps-lucas-with-basketball headcanons. He's good at physicality, and that's a knowledge base the rest of the cast (except for lucas, now) seem to lag in.

Tbh i don't know if Nancy would be a terrible tutor, but yeah she would get annoyed and frustrated if whoever it was she was helping didn't learn in the same style she did. (and maybe take it personally? like maybe think it was on purpose or reflected badly on her, when they are just incompatible learning-wise) but she is very "My way or the highway" and stubborn, so I agree that she wouldn't want to or possibly not even think of adapting how she's coming at teaching it. Just personality wise Nancy is very smart but not exactly a teacher.

Ah. yeah. with robin i'm not sure how else to look at it other than Nancy being annoyed that robin was talking too much, worried about how Nancy saw her, and suggesting the conspiracy newspaper. People can have multiple interpretations I guess but as someone who is neurodivergent and doesn't pick up on a lot of that stuff in person except in hindsight or when pointed out to me, but can clock it in media, it really did strike me that way.

#findaanswers #steve harrington #anti nancy wheeler #anti ronance #not really for both of those but to be safe!!#stranger things #stranger things meta #anonasaurus

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zeep-xanflorp · 6 months

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rambling about the rick-unity-wong talk bc i'm upset about it

r: look, it's clear you weren't lying when you said you could've taken over earth because your finger just took over america. i need you to help me fix that.

u: oh, it took that to make you believe me?

r: why should i believe you? you show up unannounced and hijack a state.

u: i called you! multiple times! you ghosted me.

so there are two ways i think you can read rick not believing unity. one is that he believed it was trying anything to stay in proximity to rick even though he was asserting boundaries, or two, he did actually believe it but wanted to deal with the situation on his own or just wanted it gone. either way, he didn't want to be around it.

then there's the part about rick ghosting it. like okay yes. unity tried giving rick a heads up but the fact is that it knew rick wasn't answering its calls. it Knew rick wouldn't know it was there unless it made a big deal about it being there and that's what it did. it literally showed up without permission and assimilated a whole state on rick's home planet, in rick's country. just to get his attention.

w: rick, is that true?

r: she dumped me. why would i answer her calls?

and now we get a blatant explanation for why rick was ignoring unity. i imagine it would've been clear enough anyway without this explanation but rick is still upset from being broken up with. so he decided to ghost it with no explanation, cutting it off entirely.

w: alright, i'm going to commit a cardinal sin in couples therapy here, but rick, i think you're wrong. [..] you had an outer-space lady who was worried for your life and your response was hostile enough to cause a huge problem.

u: thank you.

w: now you're asking her to both forgive you and solve it?

now, the mistake wong makes here is assuming she knows the full story. obviously she's smart and i think she gave her best analysis based on what she knows of the situation, but in her ignorance she fails to listen to rick, her patient.

the whole theme of this episode is rick asserting his boundaries. he doesn't want to see unity because last time he did it ended catastrophically for him. he's not ignoring it out of pettiness but as a defence mechanism. a coping strategy. and when it decided to follow through with its plan of coming to america anyway, destroying the boundaries rick had in place, it made him lash out.

rick also has a tendency to self sabotage when things are going well for him, whether he realises it or not. he abuses morty when they get too close. he made unity party with him instead of doing its duties. his actions push people away, keeping them at arms length.

i believe his boundaries are in place to prevent these episodes of self sabotage. so when they get ignored and discarded, he goes back into that mindset.

and wong, who would be aware of this at least vaguely, blames unity's actions on rick ignoring it which is not fair in the slightest imo.

w: unity, i think the reason rick brought me here is that he doesn't know how to indicate to you he's changed. because he's changing very slowly. but he is.

now this is something i had trouble understanding bc i am a shameful rick apologist at the best of times and couldn't remember what he actually did wrong. his crime in this instance was when he was distracting unity from its work, influencing it to drink and party all the time and avoid its responsibilities. this became too much for it, especially when it saw how rick used the same methods to detach himself from his family.

so it broke up with him, leaving him to spiral into the worst mental state we as the audience have personally seen him in in present day - his suicide attempt. unity doesn't know about that, and i'm guessing wong doesn't either, because all rick needed to say to wong was that their breakup ended horribly for him so being around it is difficult for him and maybe she would've understood more. but no that's too much vulnerability for old man sanchez.

rick has changed since then. i imagine he better understands why unity left him. i also think he knows that it wants the best for him but struggles with accepting that. that's what led to this mess of a situation.

he feels hurt from being abandoned. it feels hurt that rick couldn't understand why it left. and all of this culminated in a messy situation where unity acted drastically to get rick's attention, and rick in his stubbornness and pain refused to accept it.

and so. i think wong spoke too quickly. i think she definitely knows rick's patterns and is right to call him out but made an unfair judgement on only him because even she expects the worst from him. he is changing, but she is encouraging unity not to give him a second chance because he's not there yet. when really that decision should be up to unity.

even though it does take agency at the end. after unity releases america from its hold, we get this absolutely heartbreaking scene between it and rick.

r: i trust you now.

u: that's nice. but i don't trust you.

unity turns rick's lack of trust in it back at him, and it's telling the truth. it feels betrayed by rick's actions in this episode because it only wanted to make sure rick was alright. to it, rick seems to be punishing unity for caring about him.

anyway in conclusion. rick is mentally ill, wong was a little too harsh on him in this episode bc it's a complex situation, and unity will act drastically if it can't get rick's attention. it's unfair to blame it all on rick in this case (even though things are normally his fault) bc while he did act immaturely in response, he wasn't the only one that escalated the conflict so drastically.

this is not a refined analysis. i might fix it later but no promises.

#rick and morty meta #rick and morty #rick sanchez #rick n morty #r&m #rnm #rick c 137 #rick c137 #rick #rick and morty spoilers #rick and morty season 7 #rick and morty season 7 spoilers #unity #dr wong #air force wong

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emblazons · 1 year

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So I saw someone make a post about THIS video (a commentary on Juliet’s age and autonomy in Romeo & Juliet, which is phenomenal for understanding mlvn too), BUT: I’m gonna need every single mlvn shipper who thinks the Romeo + Juliet parallel is a positive, anti-Byler association to watch this video (stitched from the first) right now, while considering that, across all 4 seasons now, we have textual evidence that:

1) Mike may not have ever been as genuinely in love with El (while devoted to Will) as we were lead to assume with earlier contexts (S1-S2)—much like Romeo was in love with Rosaline long before before he saw Juliet (the problem was Rosaline was too reserved in her sexuality for his liking something that people here sometimes say is a flaw in Will’s romantic behavior too as of S4? Oop)

2) Mike’s “secondary” love interest, much like Juliet for Romeo, is not only someone he knew BEFORE meeting El / having this “whirlwind week” that supposedly lead to their immature infallible love, but a character who is now also familial coded with El herself, the same way Rosaline is Juliet’s cousin

3) the fact that MULTIPLE characters, including his own sister, have assumed that the reason Mike was acting certain ways was because of Will, not El, even though the audience seems to frequently forget that fact—just like people constantly forget that, in the play at least, Romeo’s friends only really ask him about Rosaline at first, despite his “love at first sight” vibes with Juliet.

Because. You know. Understanding the actual context / narratives of the referenced works in Stranger Things (and how the duffers use them) might be helpful in not just understanding the context for R+J and it’s actual contribution to the breakdown of Mlvn, but how also Will was “it” for Mike first (like Rosaline for Romeo) as well.

** bonus points for the ‘the thing we thought was love at first sight was actually a matter of convenience’ comment, and also point out that Romeo sees Rosaline on the first dance floor before he sees Juliet being similar to the way people constantly have Will in their minds in S1…only find El looking like a boy in his place. 🤷🏽‍♀️

#anti mlvn #byler #willelmike #mike wheeler #will byers #el hopper #st inpos #my st commentary #the fact that they call Romeo a fuckboy in this though and that’s mikes ‘parallel character’ LMFAOOOO #stranger things

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jjksblackgf · 2 years

Text

dámelo dos, papi | 2seok (m)

pairing — papi!seokjin x reader x hoseok summary — Seokjin always knows how to get you out of a bad mood. He brings out his secret weapon, Jung Hoseok. genre — smut, pwp, mafia au i guess rate — 21+ word count — 3.7k warnings — explicit sexual content, alcohol intake, crime related conversations, threesome, nipple play, anal play, protected sex, double penetration, masturbation (f & m receiving), cunnilingus, voyerism, light choking, multiple orgasms author’s note — this has been a year in the works, so i'm glad it's finally out! big thanks to Isi @raplinesmoon for taking a look at my notes and outline many moons ago.

Dancing right below the glamorous chandelier, Seokjin’s black suit contrasted beautifully to my red dress. All guests had eyes on us as they sipped the finest Laurent-Perrier champagne and ate their Parma ham with truffled burrate. This night couldn’t be on the top 10 worst nights of my life. Nonetheless, the preppy white-collar businessmen who chatted around us were always a reminder that this wasn’t a leisure event.

Seokjin held me tighter to his chest as he swayed me around the dance floor. He already knew that I didn’t like these events, and my deep sigh let him know I was reaching my limit.

“This is boring,” I whispered to Jin’s ear. “Can’t we leave?”

“You know we can’t, baby. Be a good girl so I can reward you later, eh? Keep in mind the little gift I gave you earlier.”

I knew it wasn’t an empty promise, Jin never joked about pleasing me, especially when buttplugs were involved.

But it didn’t really move my mood. This was probably one too many. One too many corrupt people to please, one to many dangerous tasks to complete. One too many risks to take. Waking up one day and not knowing if I would see Seokjin at night. Did it matter that the job paid ten times more than your average surgeon?

“I want you to stop pouting,” Seokjin said to my ear after a minute. “It’s adorable, but I know the reason why, and it breaks my heart.”

“Aren’t you a softie?” I retorted sarcastically.

“Only for you,” he whispered before kissing my neck.

That thawed my heart. I may not like the reason why I’m here, and I may not always understand why, but that’s the man I fell in love with. With all his flaws. The song ended, and he hugged me tight before leading us to our table.

“I was going to start applauding, but I would be the only one doing it,” Hoseok started with a big grin, “You two have a plan B if this laundering thing doesn't work out.” I snorted and Jin rolled his eyes.

“You know what-” Seokjin started “No, you won’t, I’m not going to entertain this,” he gave me a look and got up “I’m going to the bar, can I bring you anything?”

“Surprise me,” I responded with a small smile. I watched as he walked away with stiff shoulders. I was still being an annoying pain in the ass, and I couldn’t let my bad mood ruin his’ even further, so it was time for a change in attitude.

“So,” I said to Hoseok, “how’s the left wing of Seokjin’s crew?” He wasn't paying attention to me, just mainly looking around the room, bobbing his head to classical music. But he turned to look at me.

“Just the same, you know how they are,” he shrugged. “Corey started chatting up the wrong police officer last week. I almost had a heart attack, and then Steve almost got into a fight with one of the Kobariv’s guys…” he sighed and brushed his fingers across his forehead.

“So you’re just running around putting out fires,” I chuckled and he joined.

“Pretty much. I wish I had your team, though. They’re just always so precise…” I shrugged, very smugly.

“Maybe they’re scared of pissing off Jin’s girlfriend,” I offered with a shameless smile.

“Do you think if I kissed him in front of everyone they would respect me more, too?” he asked teasingly.

“That’s a weird way of saying you have a crush on me,” Seokjin said, sitting down and handing me a pink drink, he had his signature rye whiskey in hand. I laughed when Hoseok blew several kisses to Jin.

I reached closer and rested my head to his shoulder. I smiled as his fingers softly caressed my naked back, and his cheek rested on top of my head.

“Aren’t you two just the cutest butter commercial couple?” Hoseok teased, batting his eyelashes and we couldn’t help but chuckle. “Hey, look at that,” he pointed with his chin to the dance floor where a group of three men were dancing. I didn’t know any of them. “They’re with that Snake guy I was telling you earlier.”

“Well, at least they’re allies for now,” Jin said, no emotion in his voice. “Want to go back there and start some friendly competition?” he asked me and I shrugged.

“Why not? I don’t mind winning.” I smiled confidently.

We made it to the floor, and the live band at least had the decency to play something more upbeat. Neither of us cared if there were people watching us dance. Both of my hands were secured around his neck, and his’ traveled freely between my hips and my back as we swayed. His lips also did a trip of their own, kissing my bare shoulder and neck whenever he could.

I let the music and Jin guide me, throwing my head back a couple of times, giving his lips full access. I closed my eyes and let my hips move to his command. My palms once rested on my neck, after pushing my hair off my face. Jin gently guided me around the room, before placing my hands to his neck and holding my exposed knee close to his thigh for a final dip.

When he placed me upright, I was a new person. I could almost feel the confidence taking over my veins, clouding my somber thoughts, leaving only lust behind. He held my chin up to hold my gaze. That wasn’t necessary anymore, as I didn’t intend to look at anything that wasn’t Seokjin. He leaned in and our noses touched, I parted my lips in expectation, “You’re intoxicating,” he whispered before he leaned deeper to kiss me.

I hugged him tighter against my body and felt him relax a little more. I was ready to deepen the kiss when we heard someone clearing their throat. “Mind if I have one?” Hoseok asked, looking at me with a small smile.

I stared into his eyes for a second and was taken aback by his beauty. I never noticed him this way before. His hair was pushed back from his face, making me notice his perfect nose. His small smile made me notice the tiny freckle he had on his upper lip. Seokjin chuckled lightly by my side and kissed my forehead before releasing me. I blinked, coming back to the present.

I approached Hoseok, placing one hand on his shoulder as he took my other. The song was slower this time, and he guided me across the dancefloor. I giggled when he twist-turned me, before hugging me against his chest.

“I see you’re also a dancing expert,” I teased and he laughed too.

“I guess we have a future,” he joked. The sudden flip of my stomach surprised me. I knew he hadn’t meant it like that. I bit my lip and closed my eyes, savoring the sensation. It didn't go unnoticed. “Yes, get into it,” he whispered into my ear.

I tried to control my breathing, but it was hard as I could feel his thumb caressing my waist, and his palm resting on the bare skin of my back. My attempts were not successful, though.

“Are you okay?” He asked, concerned. I just nodded, taking a deep breath. He pulled back, probably to see me more clearly. His lips twitched, fighting a smile. “You don’t have to blush-” he started.

“I’m not blushing,” I interrupted him, a little too loudly. A few heads turned to our direction and I closed my eyes again. What's wrong with me?

“You don’t have to blush,” he continued, “I don’t think Seokjin is that preoccupied with us,” he pointed to our table with his chin.

My eyes widened slightly as I gasped. I didn’t even think of Jin. My heart sped up a little, and the damn butterflies were at it again, too. I turned my head to look at him. He was sipping his drink as he looked at us dancing. I was pretty sure he was smirking. I turned my attention back to the dance, shaking my head a little. It was probably the alcohol making me see things, feeling things where they shouldn't be felt.

“I know what will cheer you up,” Hoseok said, looking down at me. He twist-turned me again as the song morphed into a more upbeat tempo. He giggled at my surprised expression before pressing me against his chest again.

I wouldn’t let embarrassment ruin this moment for me, I needed to get back to my good mood. Jin promised me a good time, and I deserved some fun. I squared my shoulders, holding his gaze as I lifted my chin up. “That’s my girl,” he smirked, and the butterflies were set loose again.

I was just going to let loose. If the pathway to fun was to feel things I shouldn't, then so be it. I focused on enjoying the dance with Hoseok. I could hear his breathing, his body close enough to mine that his lips were right above my ear. My hand traveled from his shoulder to his hair, pressing our bodies closer together.

His hands were all over me as he led me on the dancefloor, I could feel his fingertips through the fabric of my dress. Even more tempting when they grazed my spine, before his palm pressed firmly against my back. Every now and then he would bow his head so he could whisper directions to me, and I was almost purring.

He started humming the song, more to himself, and I couldn't help but smile a little. His eyes sparkled as he let loose, he was clearly in his element. He got more animated as the song progressed and he noticed my encouraging smile. Once the song ended, he curtsied and I laughed, slapping his shoulder. He laughed too and held my hand as we walked back to our table. Jin was waiting for us, a teasing smile on his lips.

“That was nice, I'm feeling a little jealous,” he said, wiggling his eyebrows at me.

“What can we say, we have chemistry,” Hoseok shrugged. I grabbed Seokjin’s drink and took a sip, avoiding their eyes.

“I hate to be a killjoy, but I need to coordinate some things with you two.”

Strange is a word that could describe the journey from the hotel ballroom to a room Seokjin had just booked. I'm used to his compliments in front of our mutual friends, even in front of people neither of us knew, but somehow this was overboard. I was deep into shame, thinking about how could I be so horny for Hoseok, Seokjin’s best friend and right-hand in business, while dating Seokjin.

Walking into the elevator, I got to see Seokjin taking a look at me into the corner of his eye. I didn't know if my face showed my inner troubles, and to make matters worse, it looked like he was on a mission to make me feel even more guilty.

“I don’t know if I told you this already,” he started, caressing my cheek as he got closer to me “But red looks amazing on you. Wouldn’t you agree, Hoseok?”

“Um… S-Sure…?” Hoseok said, trying not to sound so confused. My brows furrowed as I looked at Seokjin’s smirk. He placed his hands on my hips and brought his lips to my jaw. From the corner of my eye, I could see Hoseok looking away.

“Also, you don’t look so bad yourself,” Seokjin turned, complimenting his friend, and Hoseok snorted.

“Man, you really need to get off that whiskey” his tone was playful, if a bit dismissive.

“I’m just saying, we're just very attractive people,” Seokjin shrugged, feigning innocence.

“Jesus Christ…” I whispered, rolling my eyes, making both of them laugh.

I thanked the change of subject as we reached our level and I walked out of the elevator. It was somehow harder than before. I felt a pull towards the two men walking behind me, wanting to be glued to both of them. The evidence was damning, but I wanted to believe the tension was just between me and Seokjin. Either way, I didn’t look at either of them as I walked into the room.

“I’ll be back in a second,” Seokjin said, leaving before he could enter the room, and closing the door behind him.

Needing some fresh air, I reached the balcony and looked at the city lights in front of me. But I couldn’t concentrate on their beauty. Seokjin left the room and somehow the tension was still within me. I could feel Hoseok’s eyes on me, and I gripped the balcony bars, trying to ignore the goosebumps on my skin.

“Hey,” I heard him say behind me. I didn’t hear him approach. His fingers touched my spine again, and I shuddered in desire. “Let’s get inside. You’re feeling cold,” he said in a worried voice. I just shook my head.

“I’m fine.” I heard a rustle of fabric, before feeling the warmth of his jacket. I took a deep breath, and his perfume invaded my head, clouding my thoughts. I looked up at him, and his eyes were weary.

“If you’re feeling weirded out about what Seokjin was saying, we can talk it out. You know that, right?” I nodded again. He took my hand in his and pointed to the bedroom. My eyes widened and I swallowed. “It’s cold out here,” If he noticed my odd reaction, he decided to ignore it. He let go of my hand and walked inside. I followed him.

Seokjin was waiting for us there, sitting in the bed with a devious smile. He raised his eyebrows, clearly amused about something. “Is there something you guys want to tell me?”

“No,” Hoseok and I answered at the same time.

“Look at you two blushing… What did I miss?” he joked. I wasn’t blushing, at least it didn’t feel like I was. But Hoseok was another story. He scratched the back of his neck while looking away. “It’s okay, you can tell me.”

“There’s nothing to tell,” I said, taking Hoseok’s jacket off.

“Oh, okay” Jin started, “So you mean you’re not hot for each other right now?” My eyes widened, and Hoseok started to laugh out of discomfort. “You two looked really into it on that dance floor, and I could feel the tension from here while you two were on that balcony.”

We looked at each other, quickly looking away. Jin chuckled lightly and came to stand behind me, turning my body so I was looking at Hoseok. “It’s okay to feel horny for him, my love,” he said smoothly, moving my hair to one side, and kissing my shoulder.

I couldn’t take my eyes off of Hoseok. He was standing there with furrowed brows, but his stance was relaxed. He didn’t want to look at anything else either. Seokjin lifted my chin and started kissing my neck. My breath caught, and my lids slid closed.

“Don’t you want to kiss her neck, too?” Jin asked, his voice a little louder. “Don’t you want to smell her perfume up close?

“Dude, what are you talking about?” Hoseok asked, but his voice cracked.

“I’m talking about having some fun…” Seokjin answered, grabbing my wrist and sliding my hands down Hoseok’s arms. “God knows you both need it…”

“And this is your idea of fun?” Hoseok questioned. I knew that was directed at Seokjin, even if he didn’t take his eyes off me.

“I promised you both a good time tonight, didn’t I?” Seokjin whispered. He continued to kiss my neck and shoulder, and his hands were on my hips. I tried to move my hands, but I was too distracted by Hoseok’s beautiful lips. “Just think about it. Nothing needs to happen tonight…”

I didn’t know if it was Seokjin’s kisses or Hoseok’s beauty that did the trick. I just knew I was feeling my panties getting wetter. I really wanted to give into desire and feel Hoseok’s hands on me again, but what about Seokjin? What if he’d change his mind? In an attempt to break our eye contact, my eyes wandered the room. They settled on Hoseok’s pants, and I had to gasp at the large bulge.

My eyes darted up again, and I could see Hoseok was slightly embarrassed. That didn't stop him from licking his lips. Seokjin’s kisses were starting to make me dizzy with lust. I licked my lips and squeezed Hoseok’s arms in order to suppress a moan.

Very slowly, Hoseok started to guide my hands towards his chest and down his torso. I could see where this was going. He wanted to be all in. Then so was I.

He wasn’t moving my hands fast enough, so I helped him reach his pants. He leaned in for a kiss, and it felt better than I expected. His lips moved against mine with certainty, with urgency. The taste of champagne on his tongue made me bolder. My hands stopped massaging his bulge. Just through his pants would not be enough.

He helped me unbuckle his belt, and in a flash, his pants were on his ankles. He was quick to lower his boxer too, and my hands massaged him freely. He hissed as my fingers caressed his tip. A whine escaped my mouth when Hoseok’s lips left mine. I didn’t want him to leave. But I wouldn’t be sad for too long, as his lips kissed the other side of my neck. Having them both like this was starting to get overwhelming.

I realized I needed to take it all in at all times, because before I could grasp Seokjin’s bulge against my ass, he ripped the thin straps of my dress. It fell to the floor, leaving me only in my lace panties. I didn’t have time to feel embarrassed about Hoseok seeing my naked body. His hands went directly to my breasts as Seokjin massaged my butt cheeks.

Hoseok’s lips travel down my jaw, neck and then collarbone until they reach my nipples. His tongue swirled my nipple before sucking it. I hissed and my hand clenched on his dick when he bit it.

Seokjin didn’t waste any time. He slid down my panties before pulling my hair with one hand. The other went to my core, and he massaged my clit as he kissed my bare shoulder. Seokjin’s masterful fingers worked me up until I could feel sweat droplets against my back. I didn’t have the strength to jerk off Hoseok anymore, so I just lightly squeezed his base, letting mangled moans escape my lips.

Feeling my desperation, Hoseok placed my hands on his shirt. We stared at each other as his shirt revealed the unexpected abs he had. Absorbed in the moment, my fingers slowly stroked his chest and abdomen. His slim torso and toned arms complemented each other beautifully. I was amazed.

He took advantage of my surprised state and hugged me, kissing my lips passionately a second later.

“Should I get jealous now?” Seokjin snickered. I would’ve turned around to respond if he weren’t pushing us towards the king sized bed.

Hoseok placed me in bed, kneeling and aligning his face between my legs. His tongue went directly to my folds, tasting me completely. I moaned without reprieve as the tip of his tongue touched my clit. From the corner of my eye, I could see Seokjin, already fully naked, touching himself. I didn’t have time to nurture any shame. Hoseok’s lips started sucking me, and I went into overdrive. My moans were uncontrollable, and they didn’t stop until I felt the warm release of my climax.

“It’s my turn to make you cum,” Seokjin announced, with a sly smile to his face. He curled his index finger, and I couldn’t help but smirk.

He put in the condom as I straddled his lap. He slipped inside easily. I hissed, feeling him fill me up. My palms rested on his chest and his hands grabbed my buttcheeks. Then my hips went to work, moving up and down his dick. Seokjin grunted with the sound of our bodies colliding. He was letting his guard down, ever so slightly. His eyes were closed shut, and his hands squeezed my ass even tighter. I increased the speed of my hips. I would finally have the upper hand.

“Oh, shit!” Hoseok whispered. I was too concentrated to pay him any mind. But when his fingers traced the rim of the buttplug, I faltered. I hissed when he tugged it, trying to remove it. He was successful and quickly inserted his fingers inside. He moved them in and out quickly enough to make me cum a second time.

“Fuck!” I shouted, as shock and pleasure moved through my body. My walls clenched around Seokjin’s cock, and he hissed.

“Yes, you like feeling like this, don’t you?” Seokjin asked, “So overwhelmed with pleasure that you can’t even speak…”

I wasn’t hearing a thing anymore. Hoseok kissed my shoulder, and I grabbed his hair to keep him in place. His fingers left me, and not long after I could hear the tear of the condom package. He inserted his dick slowly at first, but sped up when I moved my hips to meet him.

“Shit,” I whispered. Seokjin’s hand cupped my throat and my moans started to get incoherent again.

I moved my hips to reignite the friction, seeking more pleasure than I could handle. They didn’t have mercy on me. They moved their hips in synchronicity, and the feeling was too good. They've definitely done this together before.

Tears rolled down my cheeks and I tried to cry out their names, but all it came out was a jumbled mess. My mind went blank when I reached my third orgasm of the night. It didn’t take long for them to be finished too.

I fell limp onto Seokjin’s arms. With my head on his chest, I could hear his heart pounding after the marathon we just finished. Hoseok made himself comfortable beside us. It wouldn��t take long for him to fall asleep.

“I told you it was a good idea…” Seokjin whispered in my ear. I promised myself I would agree with him when I had the energy to open my eyes.

#seokjin x reader #hoseok x reader #seokjin smut #hoseok smut #jhope smut #jin smut #bts x reader #bts #bts smut #bts fanfiction #bts scenario #bangtanbathhouse

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the-monkey-ruler · 1 year

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Going back to that anon that ask about the pain swk went through bc of the fillet

—yea theres r no time ever that this fainting ever happened in the novel nor do the bleeding. Yes it does happen in various other adaptations when the fillet does that but not in the novel.(not in the Anthony c yu verse at least. Idk about the tge other but im less likely to recommend them bc they either miss a fuck ton of jttw thing OR Very icky authors who is sinophobic af)

I think ppl who already tends to have a more negative idea of tang sanzang(bc of OSP iteration n more)tends to make his character far worse than it actually is.

Like w the fillet.(no hate to various adaptations who do the usage of the fillet that make swk faints. Love me that honestly but my gripes is w those who make it that it applies to alll swks and even in the og novel.) even going so far as to make tang sanzang as the abuser to swk. <that could not be more farther than the truth. It is in fact a very skewed power dynamics that make both characters be in the same but different positions of powers depending on the situations>

Im pretty sure he ended up doing it less as much as ppl assume he did pre-LEMH ARC. (Bro did not use the spell day to day basis pls ppl stop using it in argument bc its not even supported in the og txt itself. He called his disciple as good guys yet are ugly af—hes a asshole but not that much of a asshole. Hes so so naive but he trying his best even if he get swung w traumatizing shit every arc back to back. He like a perfect example of how imperfect traumatized person would act.

My gods these pilgrims need sm therapy

He didn't use it for years before the Six Ears Arc and didn't use it years after either.

It always surprises me when people say he used it too much considering that he only used it in frequency in a single day and then did not touch it for literally YEARS cause he really doesn't use it that often in the book.

The only real times he does overdue it is in the White Bone Demon Arc where he uses it multiple times and in the Six Ears Arc as well. Otherwise, there was that one-off with like Sanzang being misplaced with a fake Sanzang and they had to find out who was the real one, I think with the Black Wind Demon on their first adventure solo, and maybe the Lion-Lynx Arc with the dead king. Otherwise, that's about... 30 other arcs. (that is about 5 arcs out of 30~ other demon arcs)

So over the course of 14 years, I really don't think that should be considered 'every day whenever he could' ....cause he really doesn't. Wukong pulls a lot of tricks and schemes that do give him a mischievous air but the point is that the pilgrims had distrust for one another at the start that is question and put them to the test. And it's only when they face that collective battle and do they come out with a deeper understanding, not only of each other but themselves that they gain their merit.

Sanzang says they are ugly yeah (rude) but he always defends that they are good people to humans that are terrified of their looks, always trying to help even if he can't offer much but a helping word and an ear to listen. He always trusts they will save him and even not he has prayed over them because he thought they died and wanted blessings in their next life for being such good people in this one. This is his journey too and I think it's unfair for people to ignore how his character also comes to get closer to the gang. Especially after he found his long-lost family only to imminently lose them again. I mean even at the start he was made fun of for being an orphan and found his parents, but one commits suicide just weeks after meeting him and the other is the same age as him since he came back from the dead unchanged and he can't even rely on as a parent.

He was kinda put through it with that family drama.

It was just one thing after another at the start for him and I think he never had a chance to have a close group of friends to rely on.

And I hate when this idea that Sanzang is a bad person or that is an abuser when there are so many ways that they are similar and both trying to overcome their challenges on this journey while learning how to rely on other people. They mean too much to each other and while it is hard for them to see eye to eye they have that bond of loyalty that was hard won and grew with time. Sanzang is just a mortal man that can be killed with a single blow in charge of three demons and a dragon on their parol. While each one of his disciple (one that more likely than not ate his past lives) have unthinkable magic and power that no mortal can dream of fighting against.

And he is supposed to lead them to enlightenment?

It is so funny it could be sad.

And they still did it.

It was literally them against the world.

And I hate how people are comparing the fillet to a shock collar as well considering its lore with Buddhism. Like it has so much more meaning both culturally and literally but people always want to overlook its real meaning as 'it's a torture device' like... no... it's really not.

No, I agree that pain is not a good answer nor that I condone that behavior but people got to remember that this was written 500~ years ago when training the body was having a similar mindset to training the mind. That doesn't make it right but it was also to show that Sanzang was never meant to be an abusive teacher and that yes while he is wrong on multiple accounts that weren't meant for him to be seen as a bad person, jut a misguided one.

The fillet does have more history to it as well even seen in other Buddhas as a symbol of self-discipline. It was to be a sign of restraint when it comes to bettering oneself and Wukong need to accept that the world doesn't and shouldn't revolve around him. I understand it’s not as common to see in America and but it's far more than just a symbol of pain, it holds a lot more meaning when it comes to personal growth and being able to recognize flaws within yourself to better them.

That's why in the end only Wukong can be the one to take off the fillet. There is no Fillet-Loosening Spell. There never was one. The Fillet is a part of Wukong and only when he has that full control over himself, that he masted his impulsiveness and attained true enlightenment and immorality did the fillet disappear because it wasn't needed anymore. Wukong at first has to overcome his own ego and arrogance to accept that he has a problem in order to overcome that.

I thank that’s why GuanYin also gave Wukong a fillet because she knew Wukong could overcome his anger and take it off she believed in him that much.

It reminds me of that Wizard of Oz with the red shoes scene where the good witch was like "You could have gone home the entire time" and the same way Wukong could have taken the band off at any time if he learned to control himself and his impulsive. The band wasn't there to teach him to learn through pain, but rather that he can go on the journey and go through that personal growth of facing his inner demons and being able to mature as a person.

At least that's how I always saw it.

#jttw #journey to the west #xiyouji #anon #anon ask #anonymous #tang sanzang #sun wukong #ask

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anonzentimes · 11 days

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last asker here wahoo weehee but yeah i dont mind the ramble !!! honestly i do feel a little similar sometimes ourgh . maybe not with being in specific fandoms but especially when it comes to like . the smaller things like self inserts . the like

but anyway !!!!!! now im curious and im not too sure if you've answered anything of the sort before but i do wonder what you thought of the difference in characterization with Nagito in the games and in the anime?

not that nagito in the games r even one for one the same- same goes for the anime-

but i do know there's a difference , and i've heard so many differing opinions on how Nagito's potrayed in both, especially discussion on how faithful Nagito in danganronpa 3's character is to danganronpa 2, so i'll admit now im very interested on hearing your thoughts on him when looking at game nagito and anime nagito side by side eyes emoji

YAYY!!!!! I love getting asked to talk about him it's so fun!!! No one has actually asked this before, and I've been planning to do something on this for a bit!

Personally I think anime Nagito is actually really good! Although I think side lining him for a little bit was a weird decision, even if I understand why. But enough of that! Let's talk more about his characterization! I'll talk about what I think about Nagito's characterization in the anime and some annoyances I have with the misinterpretations!

I will admit that some of the fandom's opinions on, "Anime Nagito vs Game Nagito," kind of bother be because a lot of it stems from people not understanding his character in it's entirety in the first place.

The thing about Nagito is that he works as an amazing antagonist because he isn't ill intentioned and is just mentally screwed up. In the killing game his coping mechanisms and absolute beliefs are on display and he is at his worst, he's practically having multiple mental breakdowns and losing it. And his beliefs and coping mechanisms happen to be morally gray because he believes Anything is okay if it's for hope. With his luck cycle, coping mechanisms, and absolute beliefs that stem from both of these things we get Nagito. And when you place Nagito who thinks being trapped on the island forever without the ultimates impacting the world in any way is worse than one person surviving and making an impact on the world, he feels like he has to do something.

Basically, how Nagito acts in the anime and before the first trial is who he is when he's not mentally crumbling and I get really irritated when people try to say that in the game he was a "malicious psychopath" but in the anime he turned into "baby boy" like, just, GRRRAGHHH!!!!! IT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE HE NEEDS TO BE GATEKEPT WHEN PEOPLE DO THAT!!! THEY'RE MISUNDERSTANDING HIM SO BAD IT HURTS ☹️☹️☹️

I believe the anime's characterization is pretty great and still keeps in tact his absolute beliefs that lead him to do morally gray things for the sake of hope! I think he's very well done characterization wise in the anime. I liked the episode where he ends up blowing up the gym because he wants to postpone the test for his classmates it made a lot sense with how he thinks and his luck cycle! I also really love his encounter with Junko and Izuru. He says several good lines in the anime that are accurate and completely in character for him, and I love it!

I think the addition that the class thought he was weird even before he was at his worst and didn't show much reciprocation is sad and adds to his tragic life. The fact that he isn't surprised when Chisa slaps him, but rather when he is shown affection gets me dude!!!

I think it is sweet though that, his time at hope's peak is probably one of the best experiences he had until everything went wrong. He isn't shown much reciprocation but he genuinely cares for his classmates beyond them being ultimates from hanging out and knowing them so long. He has some reciprocation from Chisa and the other classmates somewhat care about him to varying degrees. I believe his overall luck cycle went, get accepted into hope's peak, good luck, gets diagnosed, bad luck, gains people he cares about in his life and some who care about him too, good luck, all of them become despairs, bad luck!

The other thing I wanted to touch upon is Bryce Pappenbrook listening to criticism about how Nagito sounds more sarcastic than intended. For a lot of the english fanbase the misinterpretation that Nagito's not honest is beyond repair especially since he's hard to understand, but I really do appreciate the effort to change it slightly. Even if people who misunderstood think there's a huge difference or even retcon with his character, I think it's a nice change that he sounds more genuine like his Japanese voice in the anime.

I think the real difference with him in the Anime versus Ultra Despair Girls and Danganronpa 2 is his role in the story. I think he's very in character, we just don't see him having meltdowns and go through his self unaware freak outs. We still see him do morally gray things and impact the plot though! In the anime he's doing better compared to the spiraling we see in Danganronpa 2 and rock bottom even more extreme beliefs we see in Udg.

Also I think the anime solidifying the fact that Nagito usually doesn't go out of his way for the ultimate's attention because he thinks he's unworthy of their time actually makes Danganronpa 2 more impactful. Because, if he doesn't try to seek the ultimates attention, then that's further solidifying the fact Nagito was interested in Hajime, he felt a connection with him even when they first met. We see him do the opposite of what he usually would just because of Hajime, and I think that's really sweet.

Nagito barely mentioning hope in Danganronpa 2's prologue is for the plot twist mostly, however, there could be multiple actual reasons for it. My interpretation is that it's because he wanted to make a good impression so he focuses on that instead, that combined with it not really coming up leads to them not really knowing what he thinks. There are hints of it and he's not purposely "hiding it" at all. Nagito is an honest person who only lies when he feels it's necessary, to further prove that point when he gets the despair disease, personality inverting disease, he gets the Lying disease.

Nagito in the prologue and in the anime are the same because he's not losing it yet, the only difference is Nagito talks slightly less about hope and his beliefs because It's not very relevant, he's trying to make a good impression, and he's focusing on keeping Hajime's attention. My favorite little thing supporting this is that he doesn't complain about going swimming. In the Dangan Island events we see him worry about it, but when he's focusing on everything else he didn't really think about it. He asks what Hajime is planning to do instead.

In conclusion, I believe Nagito in the anime is pretty good. He serves his role well for it not being his usual one, info about what he was like adds a little more to Danganronpa 2 analyzing it, and it's nice that we get to see more of him when he's not at his worst. He's still absolutely the same person and I think his characterization is really good. I think they could have utilized him more or made him relevant to the plot sooner if they wanted, but I think the impact and scenes that he has still are great and work well since he, again, doesn't have his usual role in the anime.

One last thing while I'm here talking about the anime's Nagito, a lot of people like to make the joke that he's "hopesexual" because of the one fan service line of dialogue in Danganronpa 3 where he basically says, "Hope feels amazing," and I just. URAGGHHH!!!!!!!! I'm sorry but if someone unironically says "hopesexual" I hope that their pillow always remains warm on both sides because saying it Is ANNOYINGG!!! It's so easy to get I don't know why people do this, and I know I'm being a little over the top but it just bugs me sooo bad Like,

Hope = Absolute Good/Euphoric Feeling for him, Horny = Euphoric Feeling for him, CONCLUSION: GENERAL EUPHORIA DESCRIPTOR!! He doesn't have a hope kink and the people who make those jokes are weird especially since it's straight up wrong!! I know it's just a joke, but it still gets on my nerves regardless because some people take it seriously. Even one of his songs uses this comparison by allegorizing hope with sexual desires, conveying that both are euphoric emotions for him! >:(

Anyways!

Thank you for your ask and Hopefully I successfully got all of the points I wanted to across! <3

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spectrumgarden · 2 months

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Hi, I hope this is okay to ask. Is there a form of prompting is less intrusive than hand over hand prompting but that still counts as MSN? I've read your blog and some other blogs and can't figure it out (I also struggle with understanding things, so I'm sorry if I'm just missing something). Please let me know if you need me to rephrase this. Thank you in advance.

I'm guessing you read my longer post on support needs based on mentioning prompting in relation to "counting" as MSN because in there I said something like, I personally wouldn't consider someone MSN if they only need reminders not prompting. It's been a little bit since I wrote that so I do actually have a few additional thoughts on that first.

So basically I do think if you need regular prompting for bADLs it counts as MSN regardless of what type of prompt you do need. But there is some nuance there because every generalized statement is not gonna be accurate in 100% of the cases. For example I know people who rely on visual prompting for some bADLs but can live alone & considers themselves LSN, because theres no other person needed for that. Or someone who does not need prompting for bADLs but needs supervision to keep them safe, who I would not consider LSN. So yeah, Nuance.

Also, this is very nitpicky, but I think a standard reminder does theoretically count as "prompting". Because all prompting is usually defined as is "an action to help someone complete a task they are (currently) unable to do without this help". So a verbal reminder theoretically counts as a verbal prompt, and a written reminder as a visual prompt. The thing is, I seperated reminders from prompting because it generally isnt how prompting is talked about in regards to tasks that require multiple steps (aside from the fact that it also usually is a completely different amount of effort & time needed to complete compared to other prompting). Verbal & visual prompting, in all situations I've seen where it is about multi step processes, these are broken down into all (or most of) the little steps. Like, you could call a reminder a non broken down prompt and theoretically have it be accurate, but that's not how we really use the word prompt & the word reminder already exists for this specific action so. Yeah.

Anyways to save you some googling heres what I think commonly is the different types of prompting:

- proximity control: getting close(r) to someone to remind them of the task they're supposed to be doing. Obviously only works if it's already established what they're supposed to be doing (& I'm assuming staying by their side so they keep doing it, in some cases)

- verbal: saying the step they're supposed to do out loud. So like, "grab the toothbrush" then "put on the toothpaste" etcetc (contrasted to a "reminder" style thatd simply be "brush your teeth" without the additional steps. Verbal prompting pretty much exclusively refers to the multi step system) - also sometimes used to get people to speak verbally / use specific words by prompting stuff like "say: [specific thing]"

- visual: a (series of) drawing / photo / text. Basically the same as verbal but not necessarily reliant on another person to be there (the whole time.

- gestural: pointing at things for the task / direction of the task. Probably also in more intense ways "miming" the task, such as acting like you're brushing your hair with an invisible hair brush so they copy the behavior. Closely related to the next

- model: actually doing the same task as them in front of them. In that case you'd use an actually hairbrush and brush your hair, making them follow along with their own.

- physical: this is where hand over hand comes in, but it's not the only way. Less invasive (?) options include moving the elbow / wrist / ... , as well as not doing the full movement this way & only "nudging" them for the start of the action, stuff like that.

These can also all be sort of mixed and matched. Someone might pair gestural with visual. Pointing at the different pictures of the steps of a task. Or physical with verbal. Etc. Whatever seems to work best.

Also not necessarily the point of this ask but I cant stop myself from including this bit: prompting isnt the only way people with autism are cared for. I mean, some things are really hard to prompt for especially (some) iADLs, like how do you prompt someone to control their finances?? You need to understand abstract concepts for that. You can prompt parts of it like "take out x amount of money" then "give it to the cashier", "how much did you spend on x this week" etc but in the end none of these prompts generate an understanding of the abstract concepts. so sometimes it doesnt make sense to use in the greater scheme of things of learning specific things. Or they just dont seem to help in the long term (I have complicated feelings on whether they should be stopped in that case, but like. It is a thing that happens). Or also, sometimes people would need physical prompting, but they react (really) badly to being touched like that, so the thing getting done for them instead of as a physical promt might be more helpful. since it often requires less touch. (For example someone brushing your teeth for you, them holding the toothbrush on their own, touches you a lot less, compared to someone holding your own hand down with theirs on the toothbrush, or holding onto your wrist.)

#anon #long post #hm im not happy w this answer somehow but whatever #asks

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wavememes · 5 months

Text

celeb life

These were originally posted by the deactivated user herebememes. For all the RPC’s celebrity AU needs, with muses living the high life. Since these days the word “celebrity” is mostly shorthand for “big-name actors and actresses”, this is what this meme is centered around. For use with fictional characters only. Please do not use this for “Hollywood RPs”, or to otherwise portray real-life celebrities/public figures.

Getting Their Foot In The Door:

“You sure I have what it takes? What if the casting director laughs me out of the room?”

“I want to be an actor/actress.”

“I don’t even have an agent yet!”

“A lot of this world is who you know.”

“These headshots are old but I still look the same. Is that fine?”

“Nobody swears like entertainment industry people.”

“Knock ‘em dead, champ. You’re prepped and you’re so ready.”

“Yeah, I’ll run lines with you. Sure thing.”

“Entertainment is the one industry without a mandatory retirement age.”

“Listen, if you can handle having to be on set before the sun comes up and possibly not leaving until well after it goes down, then I think you can handle this industry.”

“You are a CEO of a company and your face is your brand. Remember that.”

Career Beginnings:

“I’m telling you this in confidence: I am doing this movie for the money. I have bills to pay. Personally, I think this script sucks.”

‘I can’t go into specifics, but I have this huge part in this upcoming movie by a big-name director. I think this could be it for me.”

“You need lawyers. All actors sign contracts and contracts are full of legal jargon.”

“I have no interest in a lot of money or fame. I just want to tell stories.”

“Tell me more about this project.”

“I got a couple auditions for you this week.”

“I got a callback! I’m going into the next round of auditions!”

“There’s multiple rounds of auditions for this project. It’s big. You can’t tell anybody about it until the company announces you if you get it.”

“There’s this certain big production company that’s big on secrecy of the highest order. They want you to come in and read for this character.”

“This could be your big break, kid!”

“Be ready to meet some really weird people in the acting world.”

Rise To Fame:

“I don’t think people realize how introverted most actors actually are. Acting is a very personal craft.”

“I have no life anymore! It’s just my job and whatever else I can squeeze the time in to do.”

“Now I understand why so many actors choose to not have kids.”

“It must suck having famous parents.”

“This press junket is going to take six freaking months!”

“That love of privacy you had before now? It’s gone. Forget about it. There’s no such thing as privacy for you anymore.”

On Privacy:

“I don’t discuss my personal life with the press.”

“I told my agent there’s an embargo on all non-work questions in interviews.”

“Some things have to stay sacred.”

“The paparazzi are the bane of my existence.”

“I’m glad we have something sacred. They don’t get to muscle in on us.”

“All due respect, my personal life is none of your business.”

“The more closely I safeguard my life, the more press speculation there is about it.”

“I dunno, should I just tell these reporters something so they stop asking who I’m dating?”

“Talk shows are all about personal stuff. I’m not comfortable discussing my life outside of this job.”

”I want to live a normal life.”

“Anything I give a personal opinion on, I just know the press is going to spin it and take it out of context to make me look like a jerk.”

“Please understand, I’m a very private person.”

“If you want privacy, don’t go into an industry built around PR and public appearances. You’re a household name now.”

“You should’ve thought of that before becoming an actor/actress. Nothing I can do to help.”

“Can you imagine how it feels to have flashing cameras in your face all the time, even when you’re not at events for projects?”

Romance On The Set:

“I have a strict rule against dating costars.”

“You know falling in love with your costar isn’t real, right?”

“Shomances are just PR machine bullshit. Don’t fall for it.”

“Hey do you wanna maybe go on a date this weekend, or maybe tonight if we wrap early?”

“There’s no big sappy story. I mostly just realized I really liked kissing him/her/them.”

“We met on our first movie together and I’m proposing at the wrap party for this new one.”

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but I don’t want to mix business with pleasure. We met on a television set; I don’t think we should work together unless it’s something special. You know how sets are.”

“People just assume we date or are secretly married because we’ve been on this show for ten seasons together.”

“Hey, you know what people say about assuming.”

“There’s all this chatter that you two are getting married. Any details you can provide?”

“You and I are getting married in a private ceremony.”

“Everyone loves us. This wedding is already super expensive. What’s a few magazine photographers gonna hurt? We get good pictures and they get some hefty paydays from their bosses.”

“Everyone is speculating that we’re having a baby because I happened to wear a baggy top in the winter and eat a big lunch.”

“On this take, kiss me for real. Like you mean it. That way, if we feel anything, we can decide if this is something worth pursuing.”

“You’re really great, but you’re not my type. I’m sorry.”

“I already told you I’m married to someone else. Now please leave me alone. This is me asking politely. I like working with you, so don’t make this a thing.”

“This says you’re having an affair with one of your costars. Please tell me it is making things up like it always does.”

“I had sex with one of my costars. It didn’t mean anything, I’m so sorry.”

“My marriage was rocky and you were there. That’s all it was. We’re done.”

“You came to my fucking house? It was PR stunt nonsense for the show. None of this was real!”

“It’s only awkward if people make it awkward.”

“I’m on set 12-16 hours a day, sometimes more, for four or five days a week. Where the hell else am I going to meet someone?”

“It’s a classic scenario. Two people start dating during production of the first movie or season and break up when the movies end or the show outlasts their relationship.”

Dating A Regular Person:

“Seriously? You have no clue who I am? That’s such a relief, thank you.”

“I’m glad we can just talk like normal people.”

“You’re sure you’re comfortable dating me when I’m such a public figure?”

“Honestly? I’ve dated other actors before; it’s obviously never worked out.”

“I’m wearing this so you’re not swamped by paps. We are incognito today.”

“What’s it like working with [big name actor/actress]?”

“We make it work by not talking about work.”

“I make tv all the time. I don’t like coming home and watching it.”

“Dating a public figure is a big ask. You sure you’re ready?”

“I don’t talk about you in interviews. I want to keep this separate from my work life.”

“Acting is a unique profession. It demands a lot of me. Understand?”

“I work insanely long hours and might be away from home for up to six months out of the year. You up for that?”

“If you can’t handle this, I get it. Actors are a lot.”

“Oh, God, are you gonna get starstruck if I take you to this event?”

“You get this is a cable romance, right? I’m gonna be kissing a lot of people and simulating a lot of sex.”

“I’m going to be doing these things. It’s part of my job. If you can’t respect that, then maybe this isn’t going to work out.”

“What the fuck? Do you not trust me or something?”

Being Pregnant In The Spotlight:

“I want this journey to be just for us. I’m not announcing it and there’ll be no confirmation until I can’t hide the bump any longer.”

“Fuck, how am I going to tell my bosses I’m pregnant? I’m gonna get fired.”

“Nobody would hire me while I was pregnant.”

“You mention wanting a home birth on a talk show once and suddenly there’s a million articles about it.”

“I don’t recall inviting the paps to our prenatal appointments or my yoga classes.”

“There are a million pictures of me online just going about my day with a giant baby bump.”

“Why do the paps act like a pregnant actress is the eighth wonder of the world?”

“Look at this headline: ‘[Name] flaunts giant baby bump while on vacation with partner [partner’s name].’ What the fuck? I’m not even that far along yet.”

“When I was pregnant, I was lucky to get one or two guest spots on a couple random tv shows. Always had to hide my bump.”

“I already feel like a whale. I don’t need every entertainment magazine mentioning how huge my belly is.”

“An actress gets pregnant and all of a sudden every fucking pap vulture comes out of the woodwork. It’s like free publicity.”

“I’m starting to think the paps have some weird pregnancy fetish. They’ve never photographed me this much before.”

“I told my boss I was pregnant and s/he offered to write it into the show this upcoming season.”

“Problem with a tv schedule is it moves so damn fast. I’m having to wear a fake baby bump over my real one because the character is about to pop.”

“The lead actress on my show is pregnant.”

“Three of our crew members are due around the same time as me. It’s nice to not be going through this all alone.”

“I’ve decided to have a baby by myself. The press is going to have a field day with that.”

“Does the paparazzi expect to be in the delivery room with me while I push this baby out, too?!”

“I’m just waddling around being pregnant as fuck. The paps seem to think that’s an invitation.”

“I’m doing an episode of this podcast to discuss my pregnancy experience, and then I’m coming back later to discuss the birth.”

“You know what they say: people love pregnant ladies.”

“I was pregnant all through the press for my movie. By the end, I was waddling up and down the carpets. No, really, there are pictures. I was huge!”

“I had to lug around a fake belly over my real belly because the character was having twins.”

“They had to scrap a birth scene because I was actually pregnant at the time we shot it.”

Perceptions & Connections:

“Learn to give a shit about something that has absolutely nothing to do with you.”

“You are a colossal narcissist.”

“I guess it’s true what they say: all actors are huge pricks.”

“Wow, can you be any more ��look at me, I’m such a good person’?”

“You’re the best actress I’ve ever seen.”

“You’re the worst performer in a long list of terrible performances in this show/movie.”

“You are a walking ego.”

“You’re so humble. I’m proud of you for being a genuinely good person.”

“I don’t care if people like or dislike me. I just want to be a storyteller.”

“If I am being honest, everything about him/her seems fake as fuck.”

“You are the best actor/actress I have ever worked with.”

“They wrote this part just for me.”

“That’s really what you think of me?”

“I have an in with this director because I worked with him/her before.”

“This is all a balancing act. That’s what being a public figure is.”

#roleplay meme #rp meme

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