#me updating this project after four months: YO | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

blueheavensims · 3 years

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State of the Blogs Address

Half of 2021 is gone and here we are. I’ve been feeling pretty shitty lately. I’ve been battling an ear infection for the past two weeks. It’s in both ears, but it’s much, much worse in the left, and it’s starting to cause hearing issues. The city of Chihuahua has endured some of the highest temperatures on record, with days where the mercury hit 42° C (about 104° in freedom degrees). Needless to say, it’s been nearly unbearable and we’re struggling to keep our garden plants alive. Fortunately, the last week or so we’ve received temporary respite in the form of gentle summer rain. I don’t care terribly about politics (mostly I use Tumblr as an escape from that, but inevitably have to plow through three or four woke SJW BS posts for every one about Sims 2 because it’s Tumblr), but every three years our state makes a feeble attempt at democracy. We had a state-level election. I had no desire to stand out in the heat, in a COVID incubator, so I sat this one out. I didn’t lose any sleep over it; the options were brown PRI (MORENA), orange PRI (PAN), and original recipe PRI. In a landslide that surprised absolutely no one, Maru Campos of the orange PRI (our current mayor) is now our governor-elect. In other news, while folks in the U.S. are already receiving their second round of vaccines and returning to work, we’re still waiting patiently for our government to deploy the first round. I’m in the 40-49 age group, so I may actually get it sometime around October. For 2021, I made the commitment to close out two or my longest-running “brands”: The Shop and Midnight at… I finished both; the last installment of The Shop (in three parts) went up in April, and the last Midnight at... upload went up at the beginning of June. I enjoyed making both series very much. I’m a bit sad they’ve come to an end, but from the beginning I knew that they had logical endpoints. Rest assured that even though these two beloved series have been retired, *I’m* nowhere near retiring. Another major update on my blogs is that I’ve phased out Legacy BSOK on all of my clothing and switched to mfBSOK (for Barbarians at the Gate and other fantasy-ish clothes and accessories) or nuBSOK (for modern and sci-fi clothes and accessories). Not a major change, I was just dissatisfied with Legacy BSOK’s limitations and wanted to revamp my clothes projects. I haven’t made a lot of noise about it, but after the temporary collapse of Pillowfort I started making a third Wordpress blog called BHSA- Pixel Smut. Pillowfort’s closure left my fans without access to some of my content for a week or more, and I wanted to prevent this from happening again. But the problem was finding a workaround to Wordpress’s adult content policies so that folks would actually have access to my adult poseboxes/accessories/things I can’t publish on BHSA.. While BHSA- Pixel Smut hosts the links, the pose catalogs are hosted offsite at Imgbox (or available to download). It’s a bit clunky, but it beats not having access to my blog for months (Seriously, fuck you very much, Pillowfort!). The fans are happy, Wordpress is happy, and I’m happy. So while Blue Heaven Sims will continue to feature all of the family-friendly goodness and Blue Heaven Sims Adult will continue to have sexy topfreedom (and bottomfreedom!) outfits, BHSA- Pixel Smut is the new home for all the secks poseboxes and accessories. I’ve made the commitment to engage more on Tumblr, which seems to be where the pulse of the Sims 2 community is at. In the first half of 2021, I’ve had some great discussions, got to know some people, and attempted to reply to everything. So far, this has worked pretty well for me. I don’t publish “Coming soon!” or “On the Horizon” type posts all that frequently anymore, because I feel that they put undue stress on me, but I like to post a general outline every so often. With Midnight at… and The Shop wrapped up, my flagship brand is Barbarians at the Gate, and I have big plans for it moving forward. —————————————— Ya pasó la mitad del 2021 y aquí estamos. Me he medio jodido mal últimamente. Llevo dos semanas luchando contra una infección de los oídos. Es en ambos oídos, pero es mucho, mucho peor en el izquierdo, y está empezando a causar problemas auditorías. La ciudad de Chihuahua ha soportado algunas de las temperaturas más altas que se han registrado, con días en los que el mercurio alcanzó los 42° C (unos 104° para los que usan F). No hace falta decir que ha sido casi insoportable y que estamos luchando por mantener vivas nuestras plantas de jardín. Afortunadamente, en la última semana hemos recibido un alivio temporal en forma de unas lluviecitas de verano. Por lo normal me importa una cagada mojada la política (sobre todo uso Tumblr para escapar de ella, pero inevitablemente tengo que leer tres o cuatro posts políticos por cada uno de Sims 2, porque así funciona Tumblr), pero cada tres años nuestro estado hace un intento a medias a la democracia. Tuvimos elecciones a nivel estatal. No tenía ningún deseo de estar fuera en el calor, en una incubadora de COVID, así que me quedé en casa tal y como recomienda la secretaría de salud. No me preocupa mi falta de participación; las opciones eran el PRI café (MORENA), el PRI anaranjado (PAN) y el PRI receta original. En un desprendimiento que no sorprendió a absolutamente nadie, Maru Campos del PRI anaranjado (nuestra actual alcaldesa) es ahora nuestra gobernadora electa. En otras noticias, mientras la gente en Estados Unidos ya está recibiendo su segunda ronda de vacunas y regresando al trabajo, nosotros seguimos esperando pacientemente que nuestro gobierno despliegue la primera ronda. Yo estoy en el grupo de edad de 40 a 49 años, así que es posible que la reciba más o menos en octubre. Para 2021, me comprometí a cerrar dos de mis "marcas" más antiguas: The Shop y Midnight at... Terminé ambas; la última entrega de The Shop (en tres partes) se subió en abril, y la última subida de Midnight at... se subió a principios de junio. He disfrutado mucho haciendo ambas series. Me entristece un poco que hayan llegado a su fin, pero desde el principio sabía que tenían puntos finales lógicos. Tengan la seguridad de que, aunque estas dos queridas series se hayan retirado, YO no tengo planes de retirarme. Otra actualización importante en mis blogs es que he eliminado el Legacy BSOK en toda mi ropa y he cambiado a mfBSOK (para Barbarians at the Gate y otras prendas y accesorios de fantasía) o nuBSOK (para prendas y accesorios modernos y de ciencia ficción). No es un cambio importante, simplemente estaba insatisfecho con las limitaciones de Legacy BSOK y quería renovar mis proyectos de ropa. No he dicho mucho al respecto, pero tras la falla temporal de Pillowfort empecé a crear un tercer blog de Wordpress llamado BHSA- Pixel Smut. El cierre de Pillowfort dejó a mis seguidores sin acceso a algunos de mis contenidos durante una semana o más, y quería evitar que esto volviera a ocurrir. Pero el problema era encontrar un rodeo a las políticas de contenido para adultos de Wordpress para que la gente tuviera acceso a mis poses/accesorios/cosas para adultos que no puedo publicar en BHSA. Mientras que BHSA- Pixel Smut aloja los enlaces, los catálogos de poses están alojados fuera del sitio en Imgbox (o disponibles para descargar). Es un poco complicado, pero es mejor que no tener acceso a mi blog durante meses (en serio, ¡vayanse mucho a la mierda, Pillowfort!). Los fans están contentos, Wordpress está contento y yo estoy contento. Así pues, mientras que Blue Heaven Sims seguirá presentando todas las publicaciones aptas para toda la familia, Blue Heaven Sims Adult seguirá publicando los atuendos que tengan las bubis (y las nalgas!) al aire libre, lo cual no se puede publicar en BHS, y BHSA-Pixel Smut es el nuevo hogar de todas las cajitas de sexo y accesorios. Me he comprometido a participar más en Tumblr, que parece ser donde el pulso de la comunidad de Sims 2 se ubica. En la primera mitad de 2021, he tenido algunas discusiones estupendas, he conocido a algunas personas muy brillantes y he intentado responder a todo. Hasta ahora, esto me ha funcionado bastante bien. Ya no publico con tanta frecuencia publicaciones del tipo "¡Proximamente!" o "En el horizonte", porque creo que me estresan demasiado, pero me gusta publicar un resumen general de vez en cuando. Con Midnight at... y The Shop terminados, mi marca insignia es Barbarians at the Gate, y tengo grandes planes para ella en los próximos meses. —————————————— Here’s a brief summary of what I have planned and what I accomplished in the last half of 2021. In production: • Helping Hands (Regular Sizes) • Helping Hands (Extra Sizes) • Koils (Regular Sizes) • Koils (Extra Sizes) • Under Where? (AF/ Muscly Sizes) • Under Where? (Curvy Sizes) • Bold Brenna: Midnight Raid • Aim for the Sky (Part 1) • Lord O’ Bones/Lady O’ Bones Planned projects: Barbarians at the Gate • at least 3-4 weapon accessory & pose projects • an additional 2-3 warpaint overlay boxes • 3-4 more Bad Witch outfit sets • 4-5 more “regular” outfit sets • 2-3 more Bold Brenna poseboxes Tutorial Library • Time permitting, few new tutorials. Body Talk • 2-3 more adult poseboxes Corporate Affairs • 2-3 more adult poseboxes Clothing conversions • Many, many planned projects, conversions of meshes by Julie J, MDPthatsme, WeBluePeace, and more

#smeg #non-sims

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blackkudos · 4 years

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Todrick Hall

Todrick Hall (born April 4, 1985) is an American singer, songwriter, actor, director, choreographer and YouTuber. He first gained national attention on the 9th season of the reality singing competition American Idol, where he made it to the semi-finals. Following this, he amassed a following on YouTube with multiple viral videos including original songs, parodies, and skits. A documentary series about his video-making process titled Todrick aired on MTV in 2015.

Starting with season 8, Hall became a resident choreographer on RuPaul's Drag Race, and occasional judge. From 2016 to 2017, Hall starred as Lola in Kinky Boots on Broadway. Later in 2017, he began appearances as Billy Flynn in Chicago on Broadway and the West End.

As a singer-songwriter he has released three studio albums, including the visual albums Straight Outta Oz (2016) and Forbidden (2018).

Early life

Todrick Hall was born in Plainview, Texas, on April 4, 1985. His family consists of his mother, father, one brother, and a stepfather. He knew he was different, he liked playing with dolls, and worried if they would still accept him if he turned out to be one of those gay people they made fun of on television. Hall began studying ballet at nine-years-old, and later worked with Fantasia in The Color Purple. He came out as gay to his family when he was fifteen; it took them a few years to accept. He also appeared in Disney's Beauty and the Beast, the Radio City Christmas Spectacular, and performed with Royal Caribbean, Holland America Line, and Walt Disney Parks and Resorts.

Career

2009–2010: American Idol

On August 24, 2009, Hall auditioned to the ninth season of American Idol in Dallas, Texas. He sang a self-composed song mentioning the judges – Simon Cowell, Randy Jackson, Kara DioGuardi, and guest judge Joe Jonas – to plead his case for inclusion in the program. All four judges approved of his participation; he went into Hollywood week and eventually the semi-finals. In the Top 24, he sang Kelly Clarkson's "Since U Been Gone" and in the Top 20, he performed Tina Turner's "What's Love Got to Do with It". He was eliminated in the Top 16 on 11 March 2010 after his rendition of Queen's "Somebody to Love;" he was one of four contestants eliminated in that round, and thus ranked between 13th and 16th overall.

2011–2013: Career growth and YouTube fame

Hall joined YouTube on May 27, 2006, and posted his first video to the site, a performance of "It's Hard to Say Goodbye", in 2008. In following years, his audience has grown considerably: as of June, 2019, Hall currently has 3.1 million subscribers on YouTube, and as of March 2018, his videos have been viewed 531.9 million times. Hall's videos include several of his own original songs and music videos, choreographed flash mobs for Ariana Grande and Beyoncé performed in an actual Target store, (the latter of which Beyoncé personally recognized Hall for), musical collaborations with Pentatonix, and personal updates.

In May 2011, he released a video audition for the third season of Glee titled "I Wanna Be on Glee", for possible inclusion in the show. Though the video was popular, Hall was not cast in the program.In November 2013, Virgin America produced a pop-music safety video directed by Jon M. Chu with music by Jean-Yves Decornet. Hall wrote the song and lyrics and starred in the video.

In December 2013, Hall released a Christmas album entitled Dear Santa, with covers of "This Christmas" and "Sleigh Bells", produced by wiidope as well as original songs "So Cold" and "SplitsOnXmasTrees".

2014–2015: Pop Star High and Todrick docuseries

From April 1 to May 13, 2014, Hall released an eight episode web series on his YouTube channel called Pop Star High. The series takes place in a world where all of the most famous Pop Stars of our day all went to high school together. The series portrays and parodies pop stars like Lady Gaga, Beyoncé, Britney Spears, Nicki Minaj, Christina Aguilera, Justin Timberlake, Taylor Swift, Ne-Yo, Kanye West, Eminem, Jay-Z, and Tyga, and draws on the tropes of high school comedy movies. The soundtrack for the series was released on April 1, 2014.

On October 22, 2014, MTV announced Todrick, a docuseries following Hall, would premiere in 2015. On 20 December 2014, Hall produced and appeared in a commercial for the series and featured other celebrities' holiday wishes. Eight episodes of the docuseries were ordered and aired throughout 2015. The soundtrack for the show was released on October 13, 2015.

In October 2015, he was picked as Elvis Duran's Artist of the Month and was featured on NBC's Today show hosted by Kathie Lee Gifford and Hoda Kotb and broadcast nationally where he performed live his single "Wind It Up".

2016–2017: Straight Outta Oz, Broadway, and RuPaul's Drag Race

Hall appeared as a guest judge on the eighth season of RuPaul's Drag Race; the episode, which featured a Wizard of Oz-inspired challenge, first aired on April 11, 2016. Hall reappeared as a full-time judge for RuPaul's Drag Race: All Stars 2 later in 2016 and again for the ninth season aired throughout 2017.

Along with Drag Race, Hall frequently appeared on Logo TV's game show Gay for Play Game Show Starring RuPaul alongside other celebrities. A second Season of Gay for Play is expected.

On June 23, 2016, Todrick self-released his second album, Straight Outta Oz. Straight Outta Oz is a visual concept album that uses the imagery of The Wizard of Oz to explore Todrick's own life and rise to fame. The project's first video was posted to YouTube on June 23, 2016 as well. Shortly thereafter, Hall announced the Straight Outta Oz Tour to promote the album. The tour originally ran between July 7, and August 12, 2016 in the United States and Canada.

The Straight Outta Oz Tour was interrupted by Hall's casting in the Broadway musical Kinky Boots. Hall starred as Lola, a drag queen cabaret performer. Hall's performance was well received by critics. He performed as Lola from November 1, 2016, to March 1, 2017.

The Straight Outta Oz Tour was revived in 2017 and ran between March 30, and June 5, in various North American, European, and Australian locations. It was accompanied by an expanded deluxe edition that included songs that were featured on the tour but not on the original version of the album. Additionally, the album included an extended version and new video for "Wrong Bitch" featuring Bob the Drag Queen, and a rerecorded version of Todrick's previous single "Low" featuring RuPaul.

In August 2017, he had a cameo as a back-up dancer in the music video for Taylor Swift's song, "Look What You Made Me Do".

From November 30, 2017, to January 14, 2018, played Billy Flynn in a limited engagement role in Chicago. During his tenure, the show had its best-grossing week in its 21-year Broadway history.

In December he released the documentary film Behind the Curtain about the production behind Straight Outta Oz. It was screened in select theatres and later released on home video. Later that month he had a guest appearance in the Bob's Burgers Season 8 episode "The Bleakening" as drag queen Miss Triple-Xmas (or Cleavage to Beaver) performing the song "Twinkly Lights". He also released a medley of covers of songs from the Pitch Perfect film series that was featured on the Pitch Perfect 3 Special Edition soundtrack.

2018–present: Forbidden, Haus Party & The Greatest Dancer

In March 2018 he announced his new visual album follow-up to Straight Outta Oz called Forbidden. It was released on March 27, 2018. To promote the album, Hall embarked on Forbidden: The Tour across the United States, Europe, Asia, Australia, and New Zealand.

On May 15, 2019, Hall revealed that he will be releasing a trilogy of extended plays to be released across the next six months. The first EP, Haus Party, Pt. 1, was released on May 23, 2019. The first single "Glitter" was released with the album pre-order on May 16, 2019. It also featured Hall's first big hit "Nails, Hair, Hips, Heels." The EPs will be supported by the Haus Party World Tour. While it was originally announced that Part Two would be released in July followed by Party Three in September 2019, the release of Haus Party, Pt. 2 was delayed to September 19, 2019.. It was supported by the singles "Wig", "Fag", and "Dripeesha" (featuring Tiffany Haddish). Part Three was originally announced to be released on October 30, 2019, then November 27. It was put up for pre-order on January 10, 2020 with two singles available, "Blue" and "Pink Dreams", and an announced release date of February 14, 2020. However, this was later pushed back to May 1, 2020.

On June 17, 2019, Hall appeared in the music video for singer-songwriter Taylor Swift's song "You Need to Calm Down"; he co-executive produced the video with Swift. On June 19, 2019, Hall announced that he will be returning to Broadway to play Ogie Anhorn in the musical Waitress opposite friend Colleen Ballinger, who will be making her Broadway debut as Dawn Williams from August 20 until September 15.

In August 2019 he joined the panel of Dance Captains for the second series of The Greatest Dancer alongside the other Dance Captains Cheryl, Oti Mabuse and Matthew Morrison. The series aired on BBC One in January 2020.

Artistry

Hall is a baritenor with a soulful, expressive voice, including falsetto; in addition to a singer, Hall is also a rapper. The genre of his works include R&B, pop, hip hop, neo-soul, funk, and musical theatre. Many of his lyrics include elements of social commentary, such as gun violence in and against black communities in "Water Guns" (featuring Jordin Sparks), acceptance of interracial relationships in "Color" (featuring Jay Armstrong Johnson) and queer culture; Hall writes and produces much of his own music with Jeeve Ducornet and wiidope. Hall also posts musical tributes to his favorite musical artists such as Beyoncé, Rihanna, and Taylor Swift. These tributes feature elaborately-produced mashups of the artists' songs sung by Hall.

Hall's music videos often feature extravagant production value not typically associated with artists outside major labels. Hall's videos often include bespoke costumes and urban fashion, elaborate sets, and extensive choreography, much of which is designed or created by Hall himself. He frequently directs his own videos as well. As part of his style, many of Hall's music videos include drag as a central component, either featuring Hall in drag himself or famous drag queens including RuPaul, Bob the Drag Queen, Willam Belli, and Alaska Thunderfuck, among others.

Personal life

He came out as gay at the age of fifteen.

#04/04

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aparticularbandit · 4 years

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State of Bandit Fic

because i haven’t done one of these since last december apparently.

i don’t think this will be as long as that one but gonna go under a read more anyway. my apologies to you, mobile users.

plans for the rest of the year:

the next three monday updates get us through what i currently have roughed out of if you lived here, you’d be home now. this gets us to what i would call the halfway point.

next monday’s update should also make it the longest roisa fanfic on ao3 - longer even than you’ve got mail and ethics 101. that’s...kind of an accomplishment for me.

roisa fic week 2020 starts on august 15 and will go for that next week, so no other monday update that week.

the next two monday updates are undetermined at this point. the poll says y’all are fine with me taking the time off but i think i may do a couple of updates anyway. we’ll see.

roisa hp au book 1 starts getting posted on september 6/7 and carries us through the rest of the year.

roisa secret santa applications should open on october 1 and i plan to keep those open a month.

prompts will hopefully go out the first week of november.

fics will hopefully be posted on december 23.

i’m currently maintaining a 2k average, but i expect that to potentially drop next month as one of my writing times switches focus to the last round of editing for roisa hp au book 1 before its posting begins in september.

right now, i’m currently doing 1k average on fanfic and 1k average on original fic - which is good! it is so nice to be writing original fic again!

i hope for my nanowrimo focus in november to be on roisa hp au book 2, which i have already started and already have outlined out. given that the last book didn’t deter too much from its outline (with the exception of the Christmas break chapter, which got split in two, and one of the chapters after that which...was completely different from my outline but still served the same purpose), i think that’ll get me a good chunk written. excited to get back to hogwarts, you know?

because i will have approximately four months mostly off in terms of monday update writing, i hope to make progress on one or more of the following fanfic projects:

soulmate timer au - particularly fic #4, which i already have about 30k in (i think - it has been a few months since i was focusing on it)

fic #4 focuses on petra and michael and picks up pretty much immediately where fic #3 left off

roisa hp au book 2 - for november, as i mentioned above

iylhybhn - i really want to finish this one, y’all; it’s just really long

epic superhero crossover - i originally hoped to finish mexican stud, the first book in this series, sometime this year and start posting it but i only just recently figured out how to work around something i was kind of avoiding writing. it’s outlined and etc. i just...should actually write it.

i know i have other fics, but i think those are the projects i’m most interested in continuing and focusing on at this time. but you know me, prepare for those to shift, etc.

and obviously i want to continue to focus on getting original fic written. i’m so happy to be writing original fic again, y’all.

plans for next year:

maintain the 2k average on a bimonthly basis (to be determined based on how i’m feeling as the months happen - sometimes i can keep that average two months in a row, sometimes i take a month off for editing, etc.).

maintain monday updates with saturdays or sundays (or both) set aside for editing the update.

basically this is a maintaining goal right now more than anything specific because it’s still july and i may change those plans later.

i’m not going to get into specific updates on individual fic projects right now. i may at another time, but right now, i think i just wanted to have this general update for y’all.

that said, thank you last update for reminding me i had a timeless/noir fusion i started that i was excited about because yo.

and also. i’m debating potentially writing another jtv rewrite. i know that the soulmate timer au is (kind of) one, and i know jane: the real story is my bitter one - but i want one that is basically:

if luisa didn’t screw up. if jane hadn’t been artificially inseminated. if petra was actually inseminated instead.

and this kind of currently relies on an additional character (who may or may not have a role past the prologue i have not decided that yet) - and i don’t think rose is sin rostro in this rewrite because i really want to use that prompt that one of you sent me a while back where rose actually married emilio for the money and i think that one fits well with this idea. but this is still in the brainstorming stages so i’m not sure yet.

anyway! that’s the update, y’all! thanks for reading! if you have any suggestions or things you want to know or anything like that, feel free to leave me a comment or send me an ask or something!

#musings #bandit does an update #bandit updates

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coffeeandcalligraphy · 5 years

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Moth Work Intro + False Idol | Writing Update

Hey People of Earth!

Today I thought I’d do a writing update on a project I’ve mentioned a lot in my vlogs but haven’t mentioned as of yet on here! This is a personal ‘passion project’ that I’ve been picking away at since January and have recently taken on as my transition project from Rewired to my next book.

So yee! MOTH WORK (or ‘boys on a boat’ for those who keep up with the vlogs lols) has been my current project for the last few weeks since finishing REWIRED. I didn’t really mean to expand it as much as I have as it simply started off as a spinoff story of my boys Lonan and Harrison which I write every few months when I’m having a breakdown and need something to cheer me up. :-)

I’ve mentioned a few of these stories in the past (like Fishbowl and Mandarin), though this story is a bit different, as I’ve expanded it quite a lot more than I intended to! If you aren’t super caught up with Rewired, I’d definitely scroll through a few of my last updates so this one will make more sense!

What’s it about?

Moth Work is a FOSTERED spinoff story following Lonan and Harrison (dumb+dumber) at the peak of their relationship. I *was saying* that the plot went loosely as follows: after finding a photograph of a woman in Lonan’s father’s dark room, they set out to find her, HOWEVER, because I never stick to plans, I have yet to follow through with this main plot thread, lol. Vaguely, I’d just say the most important part of this story is their relationship at its most fragile because who is plot I don’t know her.

Moth Work follows the events after REWIRED, and is a bit of a bridge between it and the next book. This makes it kind of hard to explain because a) it’s in a different POV, and b) context, but hopefully that makes sense! In essence: Lonan + Harrison’s relationship is big sad and Harrison tries to make it less big sad and it gets even more big sad.

I’ll share a very quick profile of both of the boys so there’s some context for the following excerpts I’ll share!

Harrison

My boy

Generally very outgoing, tho around Lonan this fizzles. Only wants the best for Lonan despite their history. He’s the ‘main’ narrator of the piece (third limited to him though I’m guilty of head hopping lol), so the work has a softer tone than I’m used to. Though Harrison tries to be a Macho Man, around Lonan he’s most himself--mellow, a lil stupidly romantic, and vulnerable.

Lonan

My problematic son/probably should be cancelled

The “issue” in the relationship loool. He’s emotionally immature and lacks accountability, but because of his past, lacks the ability to recognize these faults and work on them. Because of this, he’s fundamentally stayed the same for the last few works he’s been in (if not gotten worse). Lonan requires a lot of emotional assistance, though he isn’t self-aware enough to recognize this. This is often the cause of much conflict.

Conception:

Like I mentioned, I often write short spinoff stories following these boys because it’s a safe happy place for when I’m feeling stressed. This is basically how this piece started, though I’ve continued it for different reasons which I’ll get into. I don’t remember how the first scene was brainstormed, but I do know when I started writing this a few months ago, I wanted it to be a lot longer than my previous stories--a place where I could just dump my writing, even when it wasn’t good. I think I did this to cope with the stress of my writing class honestly, lol, I think I needed a break from ‘serious’ writing AKA a place I could just goof off and have some fun.

The writing bit:

Writing this story has been a bit inconsistent. I’ve been drafting it in little pieces since the beginning of the year, and only recently picked it up as more of a ‘full-time’ work. This is subject to change depending on whether or not I get more of book 7 done. I’ve gone from writing 20 words a day to 0 to 1000--there’s really no consistency with the drafting process here.

I have recently decided that I’ll most likely expand this into either a novella or novel itself because there is literally so much tea left to explore and it’s surpassed 10k words. Drafting Moth Work has been so helpful in easing me back into the world of FOSTERED and piecing together the huge time gap from the end of book 6 to the start of book 7. I’ve been a bit anxious to really dive into book 7 for the fear of the unknown, so inching myself closer to that timeline through this project has been very helpful!

The editing bit:

I recently did an edit around the line level for this entire piece (it’s about 12k words right now) because a) it really needed it b) I was losing steam/starting to get embarrassed and c) I needed a refresher of what had happened because je suis tres forgetful. This edit made me feel so much better about the project. It initially started off as a work where the writing didn’t actually matter and this mentality was working until I got so embarrassed of the prose I found it difficult to read through old scenes to refresh myself and thus couldn’t productively draft.

This project isn’t written exactly in my usual style--it’s pretty stripped back and actually reminds me a lot of how my style would’ve been in book 3 had I been a better writer four years ago lol. I think the looser style works for the voice/the story itself but I def wouldn’t categorize this as litfic (what I usually write). Although the prose isn’t very complex, it took me a really long time to get comfortable enough to edit?? But once I got into the rhythm of it a few days ago, I completed the edit fairly quickly, and I’m 100% feeling better about the project overall! Though the prose is still not my top priority I’m not as embarrassed of it currently lols.

I also divided the project into chapters because it was getting pretty long to just be one mass of text. I currently have 3 chapters. This update will cover chapter 1.

Playlist:

Yo this is literally the best part of writing this project, lol, I get to listen to so much different music?? I’ve made a comprehensive playlist for this story with a character by character breakdown (if anyone wants to see that/highlights, let me know!). This playlist pulls from every song from my library, so we span genres and artists like crazy. Nothing But Thieves has been the primary artist for this story (specifically their self-titled album). These songs (all NBT oop) are the most relevant if you want to get the general tone lol (anything with a star has explicitly inspired the project):

Excuse Me*

Honey Whiskey*

Tempt You (Evocatio)*

If I Get High (II)

Gods

Lover, Please Stay*

I Was Just A Kid*

Get Better

Hell, Yeah*

Afterlife

Reset Me

Particles

Sorry

Number 13

Excerpts:

I don’t have *many* because prose hasn’t really been a top priority for this project, but I’ll try to include at least one per scene.

This is one of the opening paragraphs from chapter one which I’ve titled ‘False Idol’. In short, the chapter follows the boys first attempting to destroy the dark room and then getting distracted and eventually not pulling through after Harrison finds a picture of Ominous Lady.

The chapter’s chronology is wild so we can break it up as follows:

Scene A

The boys enter the dark room with the intention of burning it down

Harrison reaches for his lighter and drops it which prompts him to find the photograph of Ominous Lady

Him and Lonan mildly argue about Ominous Lady until Lonan takes it too seriously and throws a tantrum :-DD

Scene B

Not really a full scene, just a bridge between scene A and C.

Harrison has been waiting for Lonan to return to their campsite for the entire day and he decides to at the very last moment

“hey so i’m unable to apologize for anything but also! cigarette! let’s share it! lungs!”

Scene C

The boys exercising their canoeing skills

This leads us to our first “beat”.

Lonan interrupts Harrison’s peaceful evening by having a mild crisis

This takes place right after the events of Lolita, Lolita (chapter 16 of REWIRED). We then jump back to the fictive present.

This alternates like 5 more times lol then the chapter is done!

The following excerpt describes their entry into the dark room. Don’t know how smart it is to be smoking in a room full of highly flammable material but we out here.

I don’t think she’s particularly special but I also don’t hate her so!! hoping an aesthetic photo will make it read better :’)) I ! don’t ! think ! it does ! but !

Harrison shoulders the door first, traps it open with the clip of his boot. Dust and streaks of light rake behind him as he pushes through cardboard boxes, mountains of photo paper on the ground. Lonan follows silently, still wearing Harrison’s jacket. Trails of smoke from his cigarette catch in the negatives hanging by the clothespins, chemical peel between the layers of ink. In one hand he tends to his cigarette, and in the next, lugs in the canister of gasoline they found in the cabin’s cellar. As Harrison fumbles for his flashlight, Lonan sets it down by the table so it sloshes like the Pacific.

This is a bit of when Harrison finds the photograph of Ominous Lady:

He turns the photograph over, and shines the flashlight on it. It’s scratched and developed wrong, little bits of orange obscuring the woman’s face, but it’s very much a woman. A dark bob and bangs in her eyes, jewelry hanging from her septum. Sunshades enough to reflect the European street behind her. The discreet jet of ink on her skin, blues and greens peeking out from under her sleeve. Izzy, he recognizes. Lonan’s mother.

Nudging Lonan with an elbow, “I didn’t know your mom has tattoos.”

Lonan takes the photograph cautiously, holding it by the corners like it’ll burn him. His brow trembles, but it takes him only seconds to say, “That’s not my mom.” He takes the flashlight from Harrison and examines it closer, fingers nimble and tracing the edges. In the grey light of the dark room, he looks nullified. Just a monochromatic hum of chromosomes and skin.

that’s not my MOM

After the boys find the photograph, Lonan gets triggered at Harrison’s suggestion to find the woman (he presumes her to be someone involved with his father) and promptly has a tantrum and exits. This leads us into the next scene where the boys! actually! get! on! boat! In this scene Lonan tries to say sorry for his tantrum by offering Harrison a cigarette (lol) and because Harrison is hopelessly romantic and also hopelessly dumb, says yeeeees sir! They go for a canoe ride on the water. Thought it was going to be sweet, ended up being a shitstorm but!

This paragraph is kind of toast but:

The canoe isn’t hard to get into the water. After a few nudges from the dock into the slow dip of tide, it stabilizes easily. Harrison is convinced it will capsize but Lonan knows it won’t. They take one ore each, and ignore the life jackets at the back of the shed.

The moon is large and mesmerizing. As Harrison and Lonan take turns pushing the canoe into the water, mast first, then its entire belly, it colours them silver. Lonan’s protected the cigarette in the pocket of his shirt. Harrison stares at its faint outline stretched under the fabric. Lonan steps into the canoe first, rocking with the current, and extends a hand for Harrison. He pulls him in and they row until the cabin is the size of a fingernail, the wave steady and dense. Each cut of the paddle feels like plunging a scalpel into flesh and Harrison watches Lonan do it easily. In the distance, the cabin doesn’t look so menacing. Reeve has left the lamp on by the loft, and it glimmers back like an eyeball, effervescent and tiny. Nothing but a reflective penny in the distance.

Here’s some Harrison being lame:

The water laps at the base of the canoe, and Ris reaches over and touches it like it’s holy. He makes the sign of the cross and it feels perverse, cold water dripping from forehead to chin.

For a while it’s quiet. Just the distant hum of crickets, the slash of the paddle, and the off-chance flash of something in the distance; an animal, a flashlight. Ris tries not to think about Lonan’s dad, like a dead man slithering through the water, following their boat. He picks at a saltine, sucks it between his tongue meditatively. Against the sky, Lonan is backlit and lovely and flecks of his hair peek up from around the jacket’s collar. Harrison wonders if as a child, everyone said he looked just like his father.

On top of lacking accountability, Lonan is also a professional canoeist so he takes over while Harrison eats saltines and reminisces about an encounter they had weeks prior. This leads into the solid chunk of backstory that I weirdly jump in an out of for the entire chapter. :)

Backstory consists of drunk Lonan having a crisis while Harrison tries to have a peaceful evening of taping up his drawings to his bedroom ceiling. The following excerpt describes the moment right after Lonan enters the room.

Harrison’s lips secured around his cigarette, his hand mid-air with packing tape and line drawings of the moon. A tinny country song dribbled through the radio. The minute-meal he’d heat up in the microwave lying forgotten and cold on his desk. Harrison set the pile of drawings down and turned off the music.

“Emily left?” Lonan asked. He kept his face upward, stared clumsily at the ceiling. Harrison watched his eyes trace the new drawings, following the uncalculated pattern.

This paragraph is made up of 5 similes and this is the only reason I’m sharing it :)))):

Lonan has stopped paddling. The canoe sits in the middle of the lake, lifeless, like a bone in the water. He’s turned so Harrison can see him in profile, and Ris can’t tell if it’s relieving or worrying to see his face. Lonan’s jaw is taut, like there are words he wants to say there but can’t. Filling up the hollow bone. He blinks slowly, like he’s trying to re-centre himself, his chest quivering with breaths meant to steady him. The water laps at the base of the canoe, whirling. Dark hair tangles down his cheeks like the fingers of a poltergeist.

I think that’s a pretty good way to end this post lol! How many similes have you put in one paragraph? What’s your record lol this is probably mine!

Hope y’all enjoy the intro to MOTH WORK. I have two other chapters already written which I’ll update on in a separate post! For now I hope you like this more laid back project, let me know what you think!

---Rachel

#writing #writingupdates #writeblr #amwriting #writerblr #fostered #mothwork

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azulblue9 · 4 years

Link

How Prince became Prince, told by Prince.

Deia, Bizkaia News.

"The Beautiful Ones" arrives Thursday at the bookstores in its Spanish version

JAVIER HERRERO - Wednesday, November 13, 2019 - Updated at 6:52 p.m.

"The Beautiful Ones", a first-person account of "how Prince became Prince", in his way of seeing life and art, arrives Thursday at the bookstores in its Spanish version when three and a half years have passed death of one of the most relevant and influential music figures.

MADRID. "Several people he loved and admired were beginning to fall ill, which had made him aware of his own mortality. Now more than ever he understood the value of telling his own story," explains Dan Piepenbring, chosen by the star to help you in the narration of this work.

Among unpublished photos, diaries and intimate notes, the book starts with an introduction prepared by this writer and editor who became responsible for completing it after the unexpected death of the musical star by an overdose of fentanyl. He talks about this reconstruction process long and hard.

"I spoke with Prince for the last time on a Sunday, April 17, 2016, four days before his death," he recalls after becoming an orphan of the essential vertex of the project and after three months of sporadic calls and just 30 pages of hand notes that are reproduced in the book.

From the annotations and documents found in the residence of Paisley Park, in Minnesota (USA), it took years to conclude "The Beautiful Ones" (Reservoir Books), in an attempt to fulfill the original will to serve as a manual on the creative process and the music industry and even as a speaker against racism.

"The enormity of his archive gave us hope. There was a way of giving nature's letter to his ambitions without compromising the integrity of the project ... If we only included objects that had been his, we would know that we had something authentic in our hands. Only the things he had saved transmitted something to us. The voice of the book could be his, "Piepenbring says.

Divided into four parts, the first contains the autobiographical testimony he left. "Every new school year, the children and the teachers made fun of my name, but it never bothered me because it was unique. No one had the first name Prince. Except me," he says in his ramblings about the singularity.

"Many artists fall through the rabbit hole of their fantasies and never return. There have been many who have censored this as a form of self-destruction, but I prefer the term free will. Life is better lived. The path one takes us. away from the rest. Those we considered different were the ones that interested us most, "he says in this first part.

In the second, newspapers and scrapbooks discover their formative years, just before their first album. The ascent to the top is the matter on which the story of the third part is built, while the fourth has been expressly consigned to shelling "Purple Rain", taken here as "the conclusion of the process of creating oneself" .

A good part of the exploration lies in finding a formula to define "funk", a musical genre capable of messing up the body of those who recognized themselves as a lover of order in the rest of the spheres of their lives. "The space between the notes, that's the good part," he used to say.

"Somehow, funk music was also the ideal vehicle for expressing his dilemma. Prince was the vivid image of contradiction, the synthesis of his mother and father. Funk worked the same way, fusing momentum and structure." , considers Piepenbring in his personal reflections on Prince.

Some of the keys to his compositional process and musical philosophy are here discovered by the genius of Minneapolis, as when he says that "a good ballad should always encourage you to make love" or that "the best songs are in a vibrant imagination, in fantasy characters who wear fantasy clothes creating memories together and calling that life ".

For all these reasons, "The Beautiful Ones" is not a catalog of vital nonsense like other autobiographies, but a tool for personal growth, as he himself defined: "I want to tell people to be creative. Simply, start creating your day And then create your own life. "

The ONE & ONLY__________________ Prince 4ever! O(+> 💜🎵💜

De cómo Prince se convirtió en Prince, contado por Prince

"The Beautiful Ones" llega este jueves a las librerías en su versión en español

JAVIER HERRERO - Miércoles, 13 de Noviembre de 2019 - Actualizado a las 18:52h

"The Beautiful Ones", relato en primera persona de "cómo Prince se convirtió en Prince", de su manera de ver la vida y el arte, llega este jueves a las librerías en su versión en español cuando se cumplen tres años y medio del fallecimiento de una de las figuras más relevantes e influyentes de la música.

MADRID. "Varias personas a las que amaba y admiraba estaban empezando a caer enfermas, lo que le había hecho consciente de su propia mortalidad. Ahora más que nunca comprendía el valor de contar su propia historia", explica en esas páginas Dan Piepenbring, elegido por la estrella para ayudarle en la narración de esta obra. Entre fotos inéditas, dietarios y apuntes íntimos, el libro arranca con una introducción elaborada por este escritor y editor que se convirtió en el responsable de completarlo tras el inesperado fallecimiento del astro musical por una sobredosis de fentanilo. De ese proceso de reconstrucción habla largo y tendido. "Hablé con Prince por última vez un domingo, el 17 de abril de 2016, cuatro días antes de su muerte", rememora tras quedarse huérfano del vértice imprescindible del proyecto y después de tres meses de llamadas esporádicas y apenas 30 páginas de apuntes a mano que se reproducen en el libro. A partir de las anotaciones y de documentos hallados en la residencia de Paisley Park, en Minnesota (EEUU), llevó años concluir "The Beautiful Ones" (Reservoir Books), en un intento por cumplir la voluntad original de que sirviera como manual sobre el proceso creativo y la industria musical e incluso como altavoz contra el racismo. "La enormidad de su archivo nos dio esperanzas. Había una manera de dar carta de naturaleza a sus ambiciones sin comprometer la integridad del proyecto (...). Si incluíamos únicamente objetos que habían sido suyos, sabríamos que teníamos algo auténtico entre manos. Solo las cosas que había guardado nos transmitían algo. La voz del libro podría ser la suya", sentencia Piepenbring. Dividido en cuatro partes, la primera contiene el testimonio autobiográfico que dejó. "Cada nuevo curso escolar los niños y los maestros se burlaban de mi nombre, pero nunca me molestó porque era único. Nadie tenía como nombre de pila Prince. Excepto yo", señala en sus divagaciones sobre la singularidad. "Muchos artistas caen por la madriguera de conejo de sus fantasías y no regresan nunca. Ha habido muchos que han censurado esto como una forma de autodestrucción, pero yo prefiero el término libre albedrío. La vida es mejor vivida. El camino que uno toma nos aleja del resto. Aquellos a los que consideraban diferentes eran los que más nos interesaban", destaca en esta primera parte. En la segunda, diarios y libretas de recortes descubren sus años de formación, justo antes de su primer disco. El ascenso hasta lo más alto es la materia sobre la que se construye el relato de la tercera parte, mientras que la cuarta se ha consignado expresamente a desgranar "Purple Rain", tomada aquí como "la conclusión del proceso de crearse a sí mismo". Buena parte de la exploración radica en encontrar una fórmula para definir el "funk", género musical capaz de desordenarle el cuerpo a quien se reconocía como un amante del orden en el resto de esferas de su vida. "El espacio que hay entre las notas, esa es la parte buena", solía decir. "De algún modo, la música funk era también el vehículo ideal para expresas su dilema. Prince era la viva imagen de la contradicción, la síntesis de su madre y de su padre. El funk funcionaba de la misma manera, fusionando impulso y estructura", considera Piepenbring en sus reflexiones personales sobre Prince. Algunas de las claves de su proceso compositivo y de su filosofía musical quedan aquí al descubierto por el propio genio de Minneapolis, como cuando afirma que "una buena balada siempre debería animarte a hacer el amor" o que "las mejores canciones se encuentran en una imaginación vibrante, en personajes de fantasía que visten ropas de fantasía creando recuerdos juntos y llamando a eso vida". Por todo ello, "The Beautiful Ones" no es un catálogo de despropósitos vitales como otras autobiografías, sino una herramienta de crecimiento personal, tal y como él mismo definió: "Quiero decirle a la gente que sea creativa. Simplemente, empieza creándote el día. Y luego crea tu propia vida".

Prince 4ever! O(+> 💜🎵💜

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wonderingarmy · 5 years

Text

Prince Kim Seokjin

Links

Parts 1 2 3 4 5

I have been really productive for two days, so here’s another part on Prince Kim Seokjin to all Jin bias like me. Hope you guys like it. Please look forward to part threes, they’re going to be under Princes POV. Thank you

A week had passed and Milo didn’t came back to your house or spread the video that he keeps telling you he’s going to leak if you leave him. So far, you don’t hear any news that he killed himself, which you hope he doesn’t ever do. The last thing you want to happen is for him to do that. You hate him, and he caused too much damaged to you mentally and physically, but you just don’t wish that to anyone.

You also haven’t heard anything from Jin because you chose to turn off your phone. You stayed at your parents place for awhile. Your mom said he tried to contact you but you just don’t want him to see you in that state. You just had your mom tell him that you’re busy with something and will reach him as soon as you get the chance. Yet, it never happened. You hate it when he worries about you because he drops everything he’s doing and come to you. You know he got so much on his plate too, especially now that BTS is selling out stadiums worldwide, you just can’t risk him having to stress out about you.

Weeks have passed and still nothing major had happened. While your on hiatus, you tried to heal physically and mentally, with the help of your family and some close friends. You’re friends were disappointed when they found out what happened but all they can do is be there for you and not judge you for all the poor choices you made. You did make some good friends and that’s all you needed in life.

You busied yourself with finishing all the projects that had a deadline. Going to a quiet place and taking beautiful pictures. You stayed at home and and painted, each painting represents how you’re still in a dark tunnel and still trying to get out. You also went to one of BTS concerts wearing a mask and a baseball cap, hoping no one would notice you.

Meanwhile, Jin already lost hope that you’ll ever contact him again. He hasn’t heard anything about you in the media considering that you’re a famous international model. He wished he could see you again. The more he doesn’t hear from you, the more he worries.

“Ah Jin hyung. Maybe she’s going through something” Jimin mentioned one time he seen that his brother is just sitting in the corner and just being quiet

“I know she doesn’t like me or I don’t really have a chance to being with her but I wish she tells me what’s going on. I mean, we’re friends. Like if I did something wrong so I know what to do.” Jin replied.

“Hyung,” Jungkook interrupted, “She’ll come when she’s ready. I am pretty sure she can explain what’s going on. Just try to be patient.”

“I think I am tired of waiting. It’s never going to happen. Plus we all know she is secretly dating that oh-I-look-too-good-on-everything model” he said and left the two maknaes, both looking at each other and shaking their head.

It’s been over a month and Jin lost his hope and tried to forget about you. He tried to get himself busy as well with tour and promoting their new album. It’s when you really started to miss Jin that you told yourself that you have to tell him what you feel about him before it’s too late.

You decided to go to a fanmeeting that will be happening in four days. You prepared yourself and told yourself not worry if he likes someone else as long as he knows about what you feel.

The day of the fanmeeting came and you wore a mask and a baseball cap so no one can recognize you at the fanmeeting. Jungkook recognized you as soon as you reached the panel.

“Noona!” he said surprised, “i didn’t think you’d want my signature for this photobook you made for us”

You smiled at him and said, “Let’s just say I am a big fan!”

“I missed you Noona, and you did really great in making the photobook”, he said while signing your copy.

Not long you were moved to the next member who is Hoseok, then Jimin, and Taehyung. Everyone recognized you and was so happy to see you. Then it was Jin, he recognized you as well, he recognized you the moment you reached the panel. You handed him your photobook, without saying anything and you gave him a small box wrapped in a floral wrapping paper.

“What is this?” he asked holding the box

“Please open it when you get a chance. I missed you Jinnie. Let’s talk soon?” you asked but he didn’t say anything. You smiled at him but you never got any reaction back. Not even a smile. Your time is up with him and you hurried to the next member, which is Yoongi, then Namjoon.

After Namjoon signed your photobook, you said goodbye to him and went back to your seat. You looked at Jin being busy talking to fans and signing their photo books.

After the fansign event, you left and went straight to the parking lot. Hoping that Jin is not mad at you or anything. He didn’t even looked happy to see you.

You were walking towards your car when you started to feel uneasy. You feel like someone is following you. You looked around but there are so many people that are walking down the parking lot. For some reasons, you feel like someone is watching you, and despite the fans walking with you to get to their cars, you don’t feel safe.

***

After the fansign event, BTS went back to their dorm to rest. They’re going to have another guesting the following day, so they were advised to rest for the rest of the day and sleep good. While the other members are doing a live broadcast, watching a movie and having conversations, Jin decided to go to his room and play video game.

“Jin-hyung, we’re going to order some food delivery, do you want anything?” Jimin asked while opening Jin’s door to his room.

“I’ll have whatever you’re getting. Thanks” he replied, busy with his game.

When Jimin left, Jin remembered the box that you gave him at the event. He paused his game and went outside to asked the members that were in the living room where they put the box full of gifts from the fans.

“I think it’s still in the truck.”, answered Taehyung. “One of the staff is going to bring it inside later”

“Do you need something from there?” it was Hoseok

“Yes. Do you think it’s unlock?” Jin asked.

“It should be hyung.” replied Namjoon.

Jin went outside and went through the boxes in the truck. When he found the box with his name on it. He searched for the small box that you gave him. It wasn't long until he find it. He went back inside, passed the other members, and straight to his room.

He opened the small box and found a pink USB inside.

He had to turn off his game to see what is in the USB.

“She should have just wrote a note or something.” he muttered to himself.

As soon as the USB is in, he opened the only file that was there and it was a video. When he played it, he couldn’t help but smile.

The video was a compilation of your first dates. The stolen videos and pictures that you took of him. The beautiful moments of him that you captured from their concerts you’ve secretly been too. At the end of the video, you put a message that says,

“I have fallen in love with you Jin. I fall in love with you everyday. I have a lot of explaining to do to you. You say you like someone else, but I want to let you know how I feel. I am not forcing you to be with me like how you didn’t force me to be with you. But, I wish you did force me to be with you. I wish I could spend another lifetime with you.”

After the video, Jin didn’t know what to say. He loves you too and he never stopped loving you though he lost all his hopes on being with you. He was about to text you when Jungkook came barging in to his room.

“Jin-hyung, watch the news right now!” he exclaimed

“What happened?” Jin asked, curious why all of a sudden he looks like he’s freaking out.

“It’s Y/N! Something happened to her!”, he replied, still not sure how to calm himself down.

Jin ran to the living room and saw the news. The rest of the members are just as shocked as you are. You were rushed to the E.R. unconscious due to head injury. Milo is wanted and police are searching for him.

“The bruises..” Jin whispered to himself. “That explains the bruises”

“Jin-hyung, what are you talking about?”, Yoongi asked

“Y/N didn’t have a bleeding disorder. I should have known. I have to go see her, Yo--”

Just then the manager of BTS came rushing inside.

“Jin…” he said, just like the members, he still can’t believe what he has seen in the news.

“I have to see her hyung” Jin begged.

“Jin, you will see her.” he replied, tapping Jin’s shoulders. “Just not right now. The media and the police investigating is hot right now and we don’t want you getting involve. I am sorry but I hope you understand.”

“But, I need to see her right now!” Jin is starting to raise his voice and Namjoon had to hold him to calm him down.

“Jin-hyung we know what you’re feeling right now, but we need to listen to hyung. He knows what’s best for us” Namjoon said.

“You guys don’t understand. I need to see her or I am going to lose my m---”

Jimin interrupted Jin to hand him his phone. “It’s your Eomma”

Jin took a moment to calm down and grab Jimin’s phone from his hand.

“Jin,” his mom said, Jin can tell that she is trying her best to calm herself down. “I know you’ve heard the news and I know that you are worried sick, you probably want to go to the hospital right now and see her.”

“Eomma, I need to see her.” Jin replied

“I know. I know you want to see her. But, right now is not the right time. I hope you understand. Your dad already sent one his staff to the hospital and he will keep updating us on what’s going on. Jin, I know you’re worried. But, just try to calm yourself down and you’ll see her, hopefully after tonight.”

When it comes to his mom, Jin always listens. He tried to calm himself down yet tears are starting to fall down his cheeks. Jimin and Taehyung gave him a hug. Hoseok is comforting Jungkook, who is also crying, because he loves his noona and he is worried as well. Yoongi and Namjoon talked to their manager privately about what they’re going to do next.

#Prince Kim seokjin #bts imagines #bts imagine #bts x reader #bts x you #bts x y/n #bts jin #bts kim seokjin #jin x reader #jin x you #jin x y/n #kim seokjin × reader #kim seokjin x you #kim seokjin x y/n #bts fanfic #bts fanficton #jin fanfic #jin fanfiction

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novaent · 5 years

Photo

**Note: This is not the airing of an episode, but an update for the muses involved in the project. Below will be all the plans for the second month in the SN project. If you’d prefer to follow the development of the project as other people would IC, what’s written below would be considered as spoilers! No one but the 15 Nova trainees knows that any of this is happening.

After getting over with the first month, trainees were expected to already have gotten over their nerves for the second. They’re all taken back to their dorms upon the completion of the mini-concert and then into a practice room without the time change. Just like before, Hyun Bin takes a seat at his long table next to the three coaches. The CEO appears to already be prepared.

The director lets the involved know of the start of recording and the man gets into his role. It had been a long month and all things must meet its end. “You’ve all just arrived from your mini-concert. I must congratulate you all for your endurance, but I can also confirm to you that eliminations start today.” There’s a long pause and the camera catches each trainees’ reactions.

“You were separated into SAFE and DANGER zones, which meant that if you were in the SAFE zone you did the best, and if you were in the DANGER zone, you did the worst. Stay twice in DANGER and you’re on your way home.” Hyun Bin pauses again, this time focusing his stare on the members of said group. “Although, being SAFE isn’t exactly a safe spot. We’ll also have people shifting teams and some… who won’t.”

The CEO presses a hand against the paper in front of him to get his thoughts ready. “Heo Solji was someone who last month I admitted I had no expectations to but also as someone who managed to impress me.” A camera zooms on her face briefly. “I must say I was impressed once again. You managed to fit all of the eras really well while keeping a high level of performance. You were not only talented but very eye-catching, which is what people normally look for in idols. For these reasons, we decided to appoint you as the MVP of the month for the girls. Congratulations. Please, step forward.”

During his brief pause, the coaches clap in her honor. “As for the boys, the MVP of this month was also on their SAFE zone. While he received some criticism, we like to believe he’s done much better on this month than on the previous. The boys’ MVP is Kim Jungwoo. You managed to stand out in each of the performances, and, even if your dance skills could still do some work, you still stand out between the better dancers which is quite a feat. Congratulations to you, too, and take a step forward.”

He receives a round of applause as well, but this also means it’s the end of a chance at the MVP spot. The other trainees could only aim for a spot at the SAFE zone or the risk of elimination. “Both of the previous MVPs had their roles taken for them, so their fate must still be decided. Son Chaeyoung was the one on top for the girls. She previously showed her talent under the three areas of skill, and today she faced the challenge of performing songs from different areas of Korean music. We all agreed that even if you weren’t the best, we’d still like to save you a spot in the SAFE zone. Take a step forward.”

With happy news after happy news, the applause becomes routine. “Kang Yuchan was the MVP for the boys on the first month. This means that, just as Chaeyoung did, you were considered a master of all three skills. Along with those skills, you also keep a high level of charisma. That is very important for someone who’s primarily a dancer, and also very impressive for someone who spreads himself in the different areas. For these reasons, we’ve decided to keep you in the SAFE zone. Congratulations and come forward.”

Four out of the fifteen trainees already had their positions revealed which were all with positive results. This could only appoint that the ones left had a higher chance of hearing something negative. “As I said before, not all of the SAFE zone members kept themselves there. For example, this trainee was often praised for her impressed skills, but the one thing that I criticized before is what pushed her down this time. Wendy still manages to disappear when she’s in group performances. When you sing everyone has their eyes on you, but when you’re not there’s nothing that makes people want to keep looking at you. Maybe it was the fact you were in the bigger group, but it still needs to be something to work on. Because of this month, we’ll push you down to the DANGER zone.”

The round of applause doesn’t show its face this time. If they had forgotten it before, this is the time people can start feeling the tension in the air. “This male trainee was also praised before. He is great on what he’s good at, but it can still be considered a bit lacking when they’re put in a group situation. Since this is a project that aims at debuting a group, this can be a very worrying detail. Ha Huidong was previously SAFE, but not anymore. I analyze the contestant not only during performances and we all know you like helping the other contestants, but I think it’s also important to keep an eye out for yourself. You’ll be moving over to the DANGER zone this month.”

“Meanwhile,” he keeps going. “People from the DANGER zone went up to SAFE. This trainee hasn’t been a trainee for as long as most of the other ones in this project. Kim Yongsun managed to show herself a lot this month. You were in a smaller group where only you were mainly a vocalist so you got to show your skills very well and you will be moving to the SAFE zone. Take a step forward. You must only be careful from here on out as you move to this new zone. You still have things to better and now only one month left to do so.”

“As for the boys, I think this trainee was one of the ones who grew the most this month.” Hyun Bin looks at him directly before speaking. “Kim Hosung, who joined at the same time as Yongsun did a very good job this week. You’re a good singer and proved you can hold yourself when it comes to dancing as well as fitting the different eras you were challenged to fit. I believe you’ll also fit very well into the SAFE zone so move forward. I only wish for you to keep working closely with the coaches and the trainees to try and bridge over this training gap as you still need to work on your techniques.”

Over half of the trainees have already been mentioned, but the nervousness level stays about the same. “Meng Meiqi was in the DANGER zone last month. The first one wasn’t a very good one for you. We could see your improvement on the second. You got all of your lyrics right, for one, even the ones which followed the lines of rap. There’s no denying you’re a good dancer. I always think charisma is important for a dancer and you have that. Your problem is still focused on your singing and I would have probably thought of leaving rapping behind after your first attempt. Even so, we’ll be moving you to the SAFE zone this month, so, please, step forward. You’ll only get to stay on it if you work to deserve it.”

“We also have Kim Hyuna. While you’ve been in Nova as a trainee for the least amount of time, you have more experience than a number of the other contestants. We can agree that you are a good rapper. Your dancing is not exactly up to Nova standards. With such an experience difference between you and Chaeyoung is a bit pitiful to see where you stand right now. If we were to get this group to debut right now we agree that you wouldn’t be given the title of main rapper, or anything relating to dance or to singing. We’ll be moving you over to the DANGER zone which is exactly that. So many trainees from it have been moving up, so it must mean being safe goes up too high at people’s heads.”

There aren’t many left now. “Kim Jongin was the rapper of choice after the first month. While you’re still as good of a rapper as you were before, I believe there are still a lot of areas where you lack. Spreading yourself was what kept people safe the first month but the same thing can’t keep you afloat for long. This month, you’ll be moving over to the DANGER zone. I’m sure you know what it is that you must work on and, if you don’t, then you won’t only struggle inside the walls of this project.”

Hyun Bin clears his throat and looks over at the four remaining trainees. “There’re only two girls and two boys left. Lee Kaeun, who is currently in DANGER, got to show much more of her skills this month than the last. It was probably due to the smaller number of members in your team who decided on distributing the lines over to you. This doesn’t necessarily mean your skills are exactly the best, but at least we got to see them. For the boys, it was BamBam, who I think fits the same description. With these many rappers, we didn’t get to see as much of you last time. And with a larger group, it was harder to watch you dance.”

“In the SAFE zone, we had Lee Sunmi. You’ve grown a lot since you first joined and have become a dancer Nova is proud of. This doesn’t mean there is no more room for growth, as I’m sure you understand. I think Joo Haknyeon has many more eyes than the one on this table paying attention to him. You still went straight to DANGER after his month, didn’t you? I think you as well I know you your skillset still has a lot to grow before you’re comparable to some of the trainees we have here.”

The CEO makes a dramatic pause for effect so that the cameras may capture everything they can see. “Between the two girls, the one going for the SAFE zone this month is… Lee Kaeun. For someone with so little for the first challenges, it was possible to see your development across the eras. There is a lot for you to learn and you must keep working on this if you’d like to be part of something great by the end of next month. Don’t take this chance for granted. As for Sunmi, it’s become more interesting to observe the other girls, even if they aren’t as skilled as you are. I hope you use this time to look for yourself. After all this time, it’d be a pity to see you fail. Kaeun, please take a step forward.”

His gaze traces over to the other side of the room. “Between the two boys, the one going for the SAFE zone this month is… Joo Haknyeon. There’s still… something that keeps those eyes on you. There’s still a lot for you to groom on your skillset yet you’re always ready for a stage. You’ll have to work even harder to maintain your spot this month. Just know that viewers don’t vote exactly because we aren’t forming a group of our most famous trainees, but a good collection of talents. BamBam, as I had said on our last meeting still lacked a lot even after training for so long. Even in a smaller group, you didn’t manage to stand out. So, Haknyeon, please step forward.”

The silence becomes even more silent to those who realized what was about to happen and even those who were about to discover. “I once warned that staying the DANGER zone two times in a row meant a trainee’s elimination. Since BamBam was on the DANGER zone the previous month, and now was once again placed on it, he has been officially eliminated from the SuperNova Project. Thank you for your hard work and determination up to this point. A staff member will help you out.”

A woman appears from the area of the room where other staff members wait out of camera’s reach and motions for the trainee to follow her out of the room. Once they’re gone, the CEO proceeds. “This concludes our second month under the project and starts our third and last one. I hope BamBam’s elimination will serve as an example. You all need to work hard for this. This is a competition, after all, and most of you run the risk of being eliminated by next month. Meanwhile,” the CEO looks over at the first few names he called out. “There are four trainees who managed to stay two months in the SAFE zone: Solji, Chaeyoung, Jungwoo and Ricky. It is with a strong heart that your paths have been set but the competition isn’t yet over. The last month will be the most important of all, and if you show that your time spent with such title was of worth, then a bright future must be waiting for you. While that doesn’t come, four long weeks stand between you and exactly that.”

Minsoo moves in his chair to prepare himself for speaking. “What is about to come is something that you must dedicate to more than you have for anything else in this project. For now, though, we’ll let you go say your goodbyes to the one eliminated today. Then, we’ll reveal to you the next step of this process.”

After the results scene cuts, staff members approach the trainees and tell them to change their colorful sports vests accordingly. These should be worn during practice to distinguish between their positions. Eliminated trainees are not allowed to share their current status with the public, which includes updating their SNS accounts until the episode of their elimination is aired. They’ll have until the end of the day to leave the dorm although they’re expected to leave as soon as they’re ready.

As explained, the Nova trainees will be assigned a new mission every week to work on and show their development at the end of it. The last week of each month they’ll be assigned one final mission to show in front of their CEO, Hyun Bin, which will put everyone under the risk of elimination. This month, however, the trainees will learn special performances together as well as separated into groups.

The concept for this week is concepts as the trainees will be put to the test on whether they’re able to fit what is thrown at them. The instructions to the final week are all given on the same day of the update along with the other missions and are as follows:

The SuperNova Project has its ending date set for May 26th. On that date, trainees will hold a second mini-concert, except this time it’ll be streamed live for the entire world to watch. Instead of showing performances at the end of each week, the official performances will only count on that final day. They’ll dedicate their four weeks to prepare for the final show that’ll decide their future under Nova with the risk of elimination or debut.

It’ll all start with a special dance opening sequence. First, the boys will have their own stage as seen in this video, followed by a stage by the girls as seen in this video. All the contestants will have a moment to showcase their own skills in a solo moment and they’re expected to choreograph it themselves. Once the girls' stage is done, it’ll shift into a collab stage between all of the trainees, as seen in this video. The song will then fade into the opening song of the show while the trainees recompose themselves and stand in a line.

The grand MC Lee Kyungjoo will welcome the public to the final episode and special show before the trainees are given a moment for introduction and appeal. Once they’re done, they’ll return to backstage to get changed and prepared for the next performance. While they’re gone, scenes from the preparation of the month are aired for the viewers to watch.

The following performances are all divided by gender. Each group will be given two original songs made especially for the SuperNova Project. Each song has a contrasting concept and the trainees are expected to do well in both of them. The girls will have the songs ‘HUSH!’ and ‘OMONA!”. The boys will have the songs ‘What!?’ and ‘I Like It Too’. During the concert, the soft songs will be performed before the hard songs.

Line distributions have been arranged for each song as seen in this document, but it will be the trainees’ decisions to decide who will take which line.

The first week will be from April 28th to May 4th. The groups will be introduced for the first time to the original songs and should focus on learning the lyrics to each of their new songs. They’ll have the entire day to practice either by themselves or with the company of a fellow trainee up until Saturday. On the morning of May 5th, a Sunday, they’ll go into a recording studio to record their lines.

The second week will be from May 5th to May 11th. The groups will be introduced for the first tie to the choreographies of their original songs and should focus on learning them. They’ll have the entire day to practice either by themselves or with the company of a fellow trainee up until Saturday. On the morning of May 12th, a Sunday, they’ll have a first big rehearsal in front of the three coaches when they’ll need to both sing and dance at the same time.

The third week will be from May 12th to May 18th. This will be the time they’ll learn about the opening dance stages. The contestants will not only work on their group choreography but also on their solo part which they’ll have to choreograph themselves. They’ll have the entire day to practice either by themselves or with the company of a fellow trainee up until Saturday. On the morning of May 19th, a Sunday, they’ll have to do the group performances in front of the three coaches.

The fourth week and last week of the project will be from May 19th to May 25th. The trainees will have this moment to completely dedicate themselves to the grand finale which they’ll perform on the 26th in front of not only the coaches and the CEO, Hyun Bin, but a live public of 800 people followed by the people also watching at home.

For this month, trainees will be visited every on May 23rd, a Thursday, by a Nova stylist to get costume fittings done so they may match the concepts given. These costumes will be the ones used at the concert.

Apart from that, trainees will each take an hour of their time every Friday (3rd, 10th, 17th, 24th) to have a one-on-one session with one of their coaches. When it’s their turn, the trainee will walk inside one of the practice rooms and sit down in front of their assigned coach. The room will be empty except for their chairs and a camera recording everything they say. The coach will ask questions such as ‘How was your week?’, ‘How are you adapting?’, ‘What are you feeling?’. Since it’s the last month, questions regarding their feelings about the end of the project and the previous month would also be integrated. These will serve as private time for the trainees to confess their feelings and let out any emotions they may have, as well as a great way to make content for the show. The assigned coaches are as seen below:

Yonghwa: Lee Sunmi; Son Seungwon; Kim Jungwoo; Ha Huidong; Kim Jongin

Hyemi: Heo Solji; Kang Yuchan; Lee Kaeun; Kim Hyuna;

Minsoo: Meng Meiqi; Son Chaeyoung; Kim Hosung; Kim Yongsun; Joo Haknyeon

Writing about these sessions is optional, but will award you bonus points. Each solo you write regarding the solo time spent with the assigned coach will give +2 CHARISMA OR CREATIVITY POINTS, with a cap of one solo per meeting (3rd, 10th, 17th, 24th). This means you may earn up to 8 points depending on how many solos you write. Posting these is not restricted to the week they are referencing to. As long as these solos are posted between April 28th and May 26th you may collect their respective points. Since you won’t receive debut points from these you may add your charisma or creativity points directly to your tally without a need to verify them.

Every month you’ll be given four different written requirements, one referring to each week.

WEEK 1: In order to collect +3 SHOWCASED SKILL POINTS and +2 DEBUT POINTS, write a four post thread or a 250+ solo about the preparations or execution of the first week mission.

WEEK 2: In order to collect +3 SHOWCASED SKILL POINTS and +2 DEBUT POINTS, write a four post thread or a 250+ solo about the preparations or execution of the second week mission.

WEEK 3: In order to collect +3 SHOWCASED SKILL POINTS and +2 DEBUT POINTS, write a four post thread or a 250+ solo about the preparations or execution of the third week mission.

WEEK 4: In order to collect +3 SHOWCASED SKILL POINTS, +2 CHARISMA and +2 DEBUT POINTS, write a four post thread or a 250+ solo about the preparations or execution of the fourth week mission.

Please tag all of the related posts with #nova:snmonth3 and have them up by midnight EST at the end of Saturday, May 25th. There will be no more updates.

SN PROJECT - UPDATE 3 (for the May 29 verification form)

PROOF OF ACTIVITY: [ WEEK 1 - WEEK 2 - WEEK 3 - WEEK 4 ]

POINTS:

- WEEK 1: +3 ___ POINTS; +2 DEBUT

- WEEK 2: +3 ___ POINTS; +2 DEBUT

- WEEK 3: +3 ___ POINTS; +2 DEBUT

- WEEK 4: +3 ___ POINTS; +2 CHARISMA; +2 DEBUT

NEW DEBUT POINTS TOTAL:

#nova:sn

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letsgetfuckingsuperwholocked · 6 years

Text

Words On My Skin (Part 8)

Bucky Barnes x Reader Soulmate AU

A/N: Sorry this took forever! My best friend is back in town, and I’ve been busy! To compensate, I made this part looong! Though, if I look at this part any more (meaning: going back and editing), it will never get posted! So forgive me, but I refuse to edit this! XOXO

Thanks for being patient! -Kristin-

Warnings: UNEDITED, swearing, idk...

Main Masterlist // WOMS Masterlist

“Oh, my god! You need those shoes!” Wanda gushed, grabbing your hand and dragging you into another store at the mall in New York City, boots clunking against the tiled floors of the busy mall. She skips into some fancy shoe store, hair swinging behind her, picking up a random pair of nude pumps with a peep-toe. “You would rock these heels.”

“You’re lucky Stark pays me an obnoxious amount of money and refuses to let me pay rent.” You huffed, shifting your multiple bags up your arm, “I think I’ve spent enough money to last me a lifetime, in just this short shopping trip.”

Wanda had made good on her promise, making sure that you updated your closet with things that were more stylish and updated. She’d taken you to a few random, name brand shops, and was now pulling you through some fancy mall in New York City. Vision and Caleb were trailing behind, chatting about Vision’s new interest in cooking… though you weren’t sure if he could actually taste what he was cooking. Caleb was talking about loaning him some copies he had made of his grandmother’s cookbook.

You thought you’d be fine shopping with just Wanda, but – apparently – Bucky had thrown a goddamn temper tantrum about you shopping without security, so Vision and Caleb had joined you by the third store. You’d let it go, deciding that it wasn’t an argument you’d wanted to deal with.

Even if he was such an overprotective dumbass, sometimes.

“If you’re worried about money, I’ll buy them.” She replied, flagging down a sales associate. “Stark set me up with a card.”

“I’m not worried about money, anymore.” You smiled, shifting the bags, again, “I have more money than I know what to do with, lately.”

“Do you want me to carry your bags?” Caleb spoke up from behind you, pausing his conversation with Vision, “I don’t mind.”

“Oh, my god, that’d be lovely.” You sighed, sliding the bags off your arm and into Caleb’s outstretched hand. “Thanks, man.”

He nodded, turning back to Vision to talk about the difference between baking soda and baking powder.

Meanwhile, the sales associate brought back the appropriate size shoes for you to try on, and Wanda gave her four more pairs of shoes to grab in your size. You hadn’t even noticed her browsing through the aisles. “Wanda, how the hell are we going to carry this back to the car?”

“We can just make Vis and Caleb bring them back while we go to the girly underwear store.” She winked, holding your flats while you shoved your feet into the pumps, nodding when you tested them out. “If your closet looks the way it does, I’m sure your underwear collection is just as sparse.”

You looked down, a blush warming your cheeks, “You might be right…”

“I figured as much.” She laughed, twisting one of her many rings around her fingers. “I don’t know about you, but a good set of underwear can completely brighten your day. I feel so put-together, with a matching set.”

“I’ll take any advice on how to feel put-together,” You sighed, slipping off the heels and grabbing another box that the associate had set on the bench. “I’ve been stressed out more-so than usual, because Bucky is projecting his stress onto me, without realizing it.”

“You can feel his stress?” She asked, eyebrows shooting up in astonishment, “I didn’t know that was something that could happen with soulmates.”

“He’s been overworking himself.” You rolled your eyes, zipping up the backs of a pair of black, caged booties, “Even if we didn’t have the soulmate bond, you can see it in his eyes. They get all dark when he is stressed out.”

“You should be the one overworking him, not Avengers business.” She winked, bursting out into laughter as your eyes widened and blush spread to your neck and chest. “You should be overworking him all night long.”

“Oh my god, Wanda, stop it.” You whined, clearing your throat as your heart rate sped up at the thought of you and Bucky getting intimate. “We’re still in the early stages of our relationship.”

She gaped at you, shocked, “Have you even kissed, yet?”

Looking down in embarrassment, you shook your head, “Uh, no. Not, yet. We’ve only really ever hugged and held hands.” You cleared your throat, again, unzipping the pretty boots and putting them in the ‘yes’ pile. “I feel like a fucking teenager.”

“How the hell do you deal with the sexual tension?” She laughs, shaking her head with a large grin on her face. “You two work out, together… I’ve seen that man work out, and I don’t know how you deal with it.”

“Lots of cold showers.” You giggled, slipping on another pair of red heels, “I don’t want to overstep.”

“You’re literally soulmates.” She rolled her eyes, swiping her hair behind her ear, nodding at the heels. “You’re meant to be together.”

“Still.” You sighed, slipping off the heels and putting your flats back on. “That doesn’t mean we need to jump each other’s bones right off the bat.”

She hummed, putting on what you liked to call her ‘plotting face’. You could tell that she was plotting some sort of evil plan to try and get you and Bucky to further your relationship. She’d tried it the week previous, by talking about how she was going to take you lingerie shopping, today, and winking at Bucky. She’d, also, got the rest of the team – sans Steve – to make sexual comments when you were both together.

It was awkward as hell, but you and Bucky just decided to ignore them.

“I have an idea.” She suddenly sprung up, a large grin on her pale face, white teeth fully on display. “You’re going to go along with this idea, whether you like it or not.”

Oh god.

“You scare me.” You gulped, shoving the shoes back in the appropriate boxes so you could pay. “I’m not doing anything I’m not comfortable with.”

“It’s nothing too terrible.” She smirked, following you to the cash register. “Just a little… revamping of your work-out clothes, underwear, and giving that chest a little… oomph.”

You glanced down at your chest, a frown on your face. It wasn’t that bad, you weren’t necessarily upset about your… assets. “What’s wrong with my chest?”

“Well, the grandma bra I guarantee you’re wearing, for starters.” Wanda giggled, ignoring the weird look from the woman ringing up your shoes, “You could use an upgrade.” She leaned against the counter, crossing her arms and giving you a smug grin, “Imagine the look on Bucky’s face if you walked into the gym with a sports bra that actually gave you boobs? He’d really want to throw you down onto the mat, if you know what I mean.”

“Wanda!” You hissed, face heating up in embarrassment as you glanced around at the other women in line and the woman ringing you up, “There’s people around.”

“So?” She scoffed, waving her hand nonchalantly and rolling her eyes, “You’ve been with Bucky for like… six months. You haven’t even kissed, yet. You two are literally the definition of a slow-burn romance. It’s infuriating. I hate slow burns. What, are you courting?”

“Shut up.” You mumble, taking your bags and thanking the sales woman, “I’m throwing out all your romance novels.”

“I’ll throw you through a wall, if you do.” She raised an eyebrow at you, lips pressing into a hard line. “I can move things with my mind, remember?”

“Quit meddling with my love life.” You grumbled, following her out of the store to reconvene with Vision and Caleb. “We’re getting to know each other. We have the rest of our lives for the… intimate stuff.”

“The ‘intimate stuff’ is the best part!” Wanda whined, looping her arm through yours, “Right, boys?”

Vision frowned, face scrunching in confusion as he thought about what you were talking about, “I don’t…”

“Just say ‘yes’, Vis.” Wanda chuckled, letting you go to grab Vision’s hand, “Anyways, us ladies are going to go girly shopping. Would you boys mind giving us some privacy and bringing the bags to the car? I promise we will be fine, and I will call if there’s an issue.”

“I suppose we can do that.” Caleb replied, a small smirk on his face. “Girly shopping isn’t really my forte, anyways. I prefer the fun stuff, like fast cars and food.”

“Such a manly man.” You rolled your eyes, lips turning up into a small smile, “Coming from the man who literally yelled at me for not knowing the difference between sorbet and sherbet.”

“I’m a food connoisseur.” Caleb laughed, lips stretched over his straight teeth as he juggled your bags onto one arm, so he could run his hand through his spiked up, dark brown hair. “You know the difference, now, don’t you?”

“Only after you sat me down and made me watch an entire video about how each of them are made differently.” You snorted, pulling at your sleeves as you noticed some civilians trying to slyly take pictures of your little group. “Anyways, we should get going. I want to be back to the compound by five, so I can finish my paperwork.”

“Shoot me a text when you’re done, and we’ll meet you.” Caleb nodded, stepping closer to Vision, “I’ll go show Vision around some kitchen stuff, so he can learn more about cooking.”

“Go nuts.” You waved, looping your arm through Wanda’s so you could follow her along towards the women’s underwear store. You stayed close to her, taking note of all the civilians who seemed to recognize the Avenger, and the soulmate of The Winter Soldier. “So, where did Vision find this newfound love for cooking?”

“He said he wanted to be able to make my favorite dishes, to lift my spirits.” She smiled, eyes lighting up, “Though, he can’t actually taste the food… nor does he eat.”

“It’s the thought that counts.”

When you arrived at the fancy pink and black themed store, you were immediately overwhelmed with lace and silk. There were so many different options, and you had no idea where to even start. There was lingerie, different types of underwear, all types and sizes of bras, robes, pajamas, garter belts, shapewear, and anything else that went under your clothes. There was even an attached subsidiary store for the younger women, which sold the work-out gear that Wanda was mentioning, previously.

“What size are you?” Wanda broke off from you, browsing the racks. “You look like you’re about to have an anxiety attack, just let me handle this.”

You repeated your size, fingers gliding over the silk material of the nearest robe, which was a pale, blush pink with large pockets and lace trim. “I like this.”

“So, buy it.” Wanda replied, hand already full of hangars and undergarments, “We’ll start with bras and lingerie, then move onto work-out clothes and underwear.”

“Do I have to buy lingerie?” You whined, grabbing the hanger with the robe and moving on to a silky nightgown that matched it. “I don’t think I really have any use for it…”

“Yet.” Wanda sung, branching away from you and filling her arms with more items.

--------------------

Bucky: How’s shopping?

You grinned, waiting in the dressing room for Wanda to return with a different size babydoll piece that she claimed was a must-have. Though, everything you’d tried on that fit was apparently a ‘must-have’.

You: Pretty sure I’m lucky Stark doesn’t charge me rent. The dent in my bank account is pretty sizeable. How was your meeting?

Bucky: …do I have to keep going?

You: Yes. It’s part of your deal with the U.S Government.

You: I have no idea where the heck I’m going to put all of these clothes…

Bucky: Just make Wanda organize your closet. She did this crap to all of us. You’re her newest victim. Though, she’s nicer to you and Nat about it, than she was with us. She bullied me the whole time.

You: You’re three times her size you big baby.

Bucky: She’s thrown me through a wall. I choose my battles, now. I just let it happen.

Bucky: We’ve got a three hour slot for the gun range tomorrow, by the way.

You grimaced, as a knock on the dressing room door sounded through the small room.

“I got it.” Wanda called, as you got up and unlocked the door. “I, also, started a small check-out pile for you, so just give me the ‘yes’ pile, so I can go give it to the sales ladies.”

You grabbed the hangers, rolling your eyes as you traded, “Small, my ass.”

“Your ass isn’t small.” She grinned, sending you a wink, “Bucky’s a lucky man.”

“Shut up.” You chuckled, shutting the door on her. You sat back down, quickly typing your reply.

You: UGH. Fine. I’m going to complain, though.

Bucky: I expected nothing less, darlin.

You: Just for that, you don’t get to see anything I bought.

You realized just how dirty that sounded, right after you clicked send.

Oh god, this is how people start sexting conversations…

Oh Jesus Christ, what have you done?!

Your heart leapt from your chest as your phone buzzed in your hand, his reply popping up quickly.

Bucky: Oh? What might that be, darlin?

Say something snarky!

You: That’s for Wanda and I to know, and you to never find out.

Bucky: Wanda’s a lucky woman.

“Did you try it on, yet?” Wanda called, scaring you into dropping your phone and swearing quietly. “I want to see it.”

“Hold on!” You called back, quickly switching the top and trying to contort your arms, so you could close the clasps on the bra part of the outfit. “Okay!”

When you opened the door, letting Wanda slip in, she raised an eyebrow at your flushed appearance. “What’s up with you? Why are you all blushing?”

“I was… texting Bucky.” You admitted, adjusting the strap and looking away from her prying gaze. “I think it turned into something dirty.”

“Let me see!” She squealed, snatching your phone from your hand and glancing over the texts. “Oh my god, you’re flirting with him.”

“I flirt with him, all the time.” You grumbled, sitting down on the small, plush bench. “It’s never been this… inappropriate, before.”

“Wow… this isn’t even inappropriate.” She snorted, rolling her eyes and handing you the phone. “You should send him a picture of what you’re wearing.”

“NO!” You shrieked, hands covering your face. “I’m not ready for that, yet!”

“Fine…” She sighed, putting the items in the ‘no’ pile back on the hangers. “At least take a picture of the bag, so he knows what store you were just at.”

“That… isn’t too bad.” You bit your lip for a moment, willing your cheeks to stop flaming up and removing your hands from your hot face. “This is just… still so new.”

“You’ve had boyfriends before, right?” She asked, gathering all of the hangers of the outfits that didn’t fit. “That guy at the club was your ex, right?”

You groaned, rolling your eyes, “Unfortunately, my exes are all just like him. Self-centered, entitled jackasses.” You shook your head, remembering the faces of the boys your mother forced you to date. “I’ve dated 6 guys in my life, and Jack was the longest… and the last, before Bucky. We dated for a year, until I was eighteen.” You stood up, turning around to remove the lingerie and put your regular clothes back on. “My mother wanted me to date the types of boys who would further her connections as a lawyer. Rich people are always needing a lawyer.”

“Then,” You continued, pulling your shirt back on, “when I broke up with Jack for cheating on me, that’s when I decided that I was going to do what I wanted with my life. I told her I wasn’t going to college to be a lawyer, I got kicked out, and I decided to leave the state to get away from her. We were living in California, at the time, so I moved to Florida to go to college. I didn’t see her until the day I graduated, when she flew all the way to Florida to tell me how much she was disappointed in me…”

You swallowed thickly, willing the negative feelings to leave your body. “I left Florida, following my boss to Rhode Island, and continuing to be a Personal Assistant. She passed away four weeks before I got the job here.”

“I heard about that.” Wanda leaned against the wall, face soft with sympathy, “Pepper and Rhodey where talking about it a few days before you started. Pepper was excited to have someone who studied mental health and have assistant experience. She said she took a chance and was excited when she met you in the interviewing process.”

“Well, I have a lot of reasons to be an advocate for positive mental health.” You lifted your lips a little, meeting her eyes, “After all the shit I went through, in my life, if I could make one person feel like they matter enough to better themselves and have a positive outlook in the world… that’s a win in my book. It’s the reason I chose mental health. I learned so much in my time in therapy, that I wanted to be able to do the same for other people.”

Wanda was silent, eyebrows furrowed together, teeth pressing against her lower lip and chewing on it as she took in your words. After a few moments, her eyes looked a little misty, as she quickly cleared her throat. “You… remind me of someone. Someone who – after all the shit he went through – tried his hardest to help people.” She twisted one of the rings on her thumb, running a finger over the smooth metal, “I think that’s another reason why I like you so much. You remind me of him. He was too good for this world. So are you.”

With that, she quickly darted from the dressing room, muttering about putting the items on the return rack and needing a bottle of perfume.

You picked up your phone, biting your lip as you stared at the picture of you and Bucky from the sushi restaurant that was your background and lock screen. Your heart hurt. It hurt for Wanda, and the person that she was talking about. You didn’t know all the details about her past, but you did know that she had a brother who died. That had to be who she was talking about…

Your phone buzzed in your hand, and a little notification popped up from your old college friend, Farida. She’d replied back to your picture of a scarf you bought her from some fancy name brand store and called you insane for spending that much money on her. Her quirky little text brought a smile to your face, making you instantly feel better.

You quickly replied that you wanted to see her and her husband soon, since they’d moved with their new baby to the New York area, pretty recently.

Another text came in, from Bucky.

Bucky: What’s up? You went a little dark for a second, there. I could feel you from here. Are you okay?

You smiled at his concern, typing out a small reply of being okay, and that you were coming back, soon.

“Y/n, are you ready?” Wanda called into the dressing room, lightly knocking on the door, “The boys want to get back, and I think we’ve bought enough to start your closet.”

“To start my closet?” You scoffed, exiting the little room with the rest of your ‘yes’ pile. “I’m pretty sure you’re going to have to organize all of this for me, so I know where the hell to put it all.”

“I would love to.” She grinned, grabbing your hand and dragging you to the cash register. “I did that for everyone else who has no knowledge in fashion. Who do you think made Bucky buy the leather jacket he likes so much?”

“He does look good in that leather jacket.” You mumbled, sliding your card through the reader. Ignoring the fact that you just bought enough stuff that there was a goddamn comma in the total price and multiple bags of undergarments and work-out gear. “I can’t wait to see Bucky’s eyes bulge from his head at the new leggings.”

“That won’t be the only thing bulging.”

“Wanda!” You squealed, slapping a hand over your face. “I’m seriously burning all your romance novels!”

“Your reactions are just too good to stop!” She laughed, pulling you out the door. “Besides, you’ve been together long enough to start saying naughty things.”

“I don’t actually know if he considers us together.” You mumbled, removing your hand from your face with a small sigh. “I know we tell people we’re soulmates, and the world knows from the TMZ article… but we’ve never actually established any of that stuff.”

She frowned, rolling her eyes in exasperation, “You both act like you’re in a relationship, why not stick a label on it?”

“I don’t know… I don’t exactly see myself with anyone else.” You followed her out of the store, glancing around for Vision and Caleb – not spotting the dark haired man and the android, anywhere. “We just haven’t…”

“DTR? ‘Defined the relationship’?” Wanda supplied, a small smile spreading on her face. “I’ve been watching American reality TV. I’ve been learning the slang.”

“Ew. Watch something that’s actually worth watching… I’ll show you Netflix.” You laughed, as you sat down on the bench to wait for the guys. The mall was starting to get busy, people husting through the crowded halls of the giant building. You watched as a young mother pushed her toddler along in a stroller, her partner walking alongside of her as they made their way into the baby store a few shops down. “This soulmate shit’s weird.”

“I wouldn’t know.” She shrugged, eyes flitting down to your exposed tattoo on your wrist. There was no reason to hide it, anymore, when everyone knew whose soulmate you were. “I don’t have a soulmate.” Her eyes glossed over, lost in a memory that you couldn’t see. “My… my brother had a soulmate, though. He never got to meet her. The poor soul is without him, suffering, and there’s nothing I can do to help them.”

“It happened to my grandma.” You held her hand, which was surrounded in a twisting, red light. “It was the hardest thing she’d ever had to live with… but she managed to live her life. There is always hope.”

“I hope so.” She sighed, realizing that her powers were starting to show in public, and reigning them back in. “At least that’s one less thing I have to worry about in my life. Though… it’d be nice to know that someone is destined to love me… like in the books.”

“Someone does love you.” You smiled, catching sight of the boys, who were leisurely walking down the crowded path. Vision, though wearing civilian clothes, was catching the eyes of everyone around. “Just because you don’t have the tattoo, doesn’t mean that someone isn’t destined to love you.”

She followed your line of sight, cheeks flushing red at the sight of Vision walking with Caleb. “You might be right.”

“I know I am.” You pulled her up, thankful that Caleb had brought your bags to the car. “Now, lets head home. I have to mentally prepare to shoot guns, tomorrow.”

“It’s not that bad.” Caleb snorts, grabbing your bags from your hand and glancing around the shops – as someone with training always does. “Squeeze. Don’t pull. It’s fairly simple.”

“Speak for yourself.”

Part 9

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jinniesxlamp · 5 years

Text

Hello, Goodbye - Chapter 5

LIST OF CHAPTERS –> Masterlist

A/N: Hello, my loves! I know I’ve been quite slow in updating this series compared to my first one. I’m juggling this between my full time job. Thank you so much for being patient with me. My ask is always open to all for any comments/chitchat! ♡😍

Even with the absolute sunlight that marked the beginning of a new day, the fact that it was merely 8:02 am remained an ungodly hour for Min Yoongi. He had lost count of how many times he switched positions on the ruffled king sized bed in hopes of falling back to sleep. But the indistinct sounds and maffles from the outside made that utterly impossible.

“Jinjja” sighed Yoongi as he struggled to sit himself up. Keeping his eyes wide open was an even greater wrangle.

Shuffling his hair on the way out the bedroom, he started walking towards the kitchen where the noise was coming from. Within a six feet distance stood a clear view of three pajama’d bodies crowding over the laptop that sat on the kitchen counter.

“Ya! keep it down will you? Not everyone in this house is fond of waking up early” it was Jin yelling by his doorway from the other end of the apartment.

“Ani, hyung. Come see this” responded Jimin whose eyes glistened with gossip all over them.

The three maknaes and the oldest hyung barely noticed Yoongi on the far corner, who was just standing behind the wall dividing the kitchen and the livingroom.

“Museun il iya?” Giving into the curiosity, instead of dragging himself back inside his room, he shut the door from behind and headed towards them.

“Mwo ya?!” His eyes growing with his voice, now waking the rest of the household.

“What’s going on?” Appeared Hoseok, half awake and Namjoon who seemed slightly irritated. This time, Yoongi decided to join in, wondering what the comotion was about.

“Hyung!” Gasped Taehyung, seeing him enter.

“Museun il iya?” Yoongi asked.

“Ya. This producer for your show....this isn’t our Y/N, is it?” Interrogated Jin, pointing at the k-media article flashing on Jungkook’s laptop screen

“Mwo rago yo?!” said Hoseok who seemed to have completely woken up, startled with the quick turn out of events.

It was evident on Yoongi’s face that he felt a little flustered, avoiding eye contact with anyone, stuttering in between words.

“O-oh”

“Wah daebak” Namjoon couldn’t help but react in surprise, with his hair sticking out in all directions. Hoseok and Jin were quick to pick up from where he left.

“Jinjja? Is it really her?”

“Oh”

“Ya! Jeongmal, why didn’t you tell us! It’s been a month”

Yoongi’s POV

our Y/N

I couldn’t help but roll my eyes, grunting at the back of my head hearing Jin hyung’s preposterous choice of words.

“I didn’t think it was something I had to announce” I said plainly, opening the fridge, taking the water pitcher out. They all began pausing, staring at me as if waiting for another explanation.

“So......did you get to talk to each other?” Started Jimin after clearing his throat to break the silence.

I nodded, pouring water into my glass.

“Jinjja?! Waaah! Aigoooo Min Yoongi” Jin hyung slowly started clapping his hands with eyes closed and head swaying from side to side.

“She told me to get lost” I said back with a glare.

“Ehhh?!??” The maknae line shreiked in unison.

“Did she really, hyung?” Asked Jungkook

“Oh”

Before the air of awkwardness dragged further between the seven of us, I felt the need to walk back towards my room, not having the need to say anything else. Sleep sounded much better than meaningless conversations such as this.

“Geureom”

“Ah chakaman hyung. Before I forget, drop by the office today before noon. Manager Hobeom wants you to pick out a suit for tonight.”

“Oh” I answered with my back facing towards Namjoon.

“Suit?” I heard Jimin’s fading voice in a whisper before stepping inside my door.

“It’s their premier night this evening.”

—

Y/N’s POV

Seven stacks of scripts, contracts, notices and everything else in between. Nothing else but those seemed to have occupied my desk leaving absolutley no space even for a cup of coffee. It’s unacceptable how time runs ridiculously fast.

“Come in” I said, my eyes not leaving the fourth packet I had just picked up, addressing the knock on my door.

“Gwajang-nim, you should probably start heading home. You won’t have much time to prepare for the premier.”

Wanting to ignore the reminder Soojin had just given me, something else instantly came to mind. The lunchbox she had brought me four hours ago sat on the same spot she had left them. I tried to act normal in hopes she wouldn’t notice but soon enough she did.

“You haven’t even touched your food. Again.” She said in a stern, disappointed voice.

“Is it lunch time already?” I tried to act stupid, fully aware that it’s ten minutes past four in the afternoon.

“Eonnie.” The fact that she addressed me in that manner at work was more than enough to bring me to her attention.

“Mianhae, Soojinssi. I got carried away with work again.” I gave her a weak smile, trying to pacify the dismay she felt towards me.

“Jeongmal. What am I going to do with you?” She sighed, arms crossed and head swinging from side to side.

“If it makes anything better, I’ll start heading home to prepare for tonight”

“Ya. At least take a bite of the kimbap. Your gown was already delivered to your house earlier.”

“Arasso. Komawo”

—

Having consumed two glasses of champagne, I thought I’d feel less bewildered with the news I just got from Chairman Byeon himself. Apparently, a big meeting was held in the higher office today, discussing about Park In Jung’s alleged money laundering investigation. They had evidence to confirm his abomination from left and right, forcing them to come up with the decision to fire him. Another meeting will be held next week, announcing his termination from the project and my promotion. Chairman Byeon just thought it was a good idea to give me a heads up. Or not. Ever since that conversation happened, my stomach started feeling ill, I felt hot flushes creep all over my back towards my neck. Frankly, the sudden shift of events made me very uncomfortable. I couldn’t swallow the sense of responsibilty I’m about to be handed. What happens if I screw up? I might ruin the whole production.

“Would you like another glass, maam?” I shook my head gently, coming back from the harrowing conversations I was having with myself.

“De.” I muttered in unison with another female’s voice, failing to notice her hand grabbing on the same glass I laid my fingers on.

“Joesonghamnida” releasing my grip on the glass, I looked up to apologize.

“Y/N”

There was no need to register anything, like a natural instinct, which I thought would have faded over the years, my throat began to dry, and my tongue curled almost unwanting to speak. But I did anyway.

“Long time no see” I said bitterly, with no intention of sounding so.

“What brings you here?” She asked, failing to hide the slight belligerence in her tone.

“I’m the Supervising Producer for this show” like her tone of voice, the surprise in her eyes too was just as unsubtle.

“Ah. Chughahae”

“What brings you here, Suran?”

Believe me, I don’t know why I asked either.

“Yoongi-yah asked me to come. I was thinking why he didn’t mention you when he called me for the invite.”

Whether or not she was doing this on purpose, I couldn’t seem to pin point what her intentions were of even bringing that up. Was that supposed to affect me in anyway?

“Geureom. Enjoy the rest of the night.”

There was no point in going on with the conversation so I ended it and walked away, dragging myself towards the open balcony of the venue. I needed some fresh air. My eyes were distracted at the sight of city lights, covering the entire landscape of Seoul.

“Yeppuda” I said to myself.

“They are”

Hearing a man’s voice from behind, I turned, leaning my back on the balcony and having the entire hallway in clear view.

“Aren’t you cold?” He asked, savoring the view of the lights I was admiring awhile ago.

“The cold doesn’t bother me. At least not anymore.” I answered, allowing my eyes to wander along the crowd in front of me.

“Do you really not remember me?” he asked so calmly while I eyed Suran from feets apart, she was with Yoongi.

“How can I not remember you when you’re doing it again?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He said, acting oblivious.

“Jooheonssi, I’m not very fond of flowers. Not when I was an intern years back, and definitely not now. Those flowers you’ve been sending to my office will rot in there, eventually.” Going around the bush would do no good for men, I’ve realized this over the years. I had no choice but to be blunt and straightforward.

“How did you know it was me back then? We barely even made conversation” He asked. I continued to gaze on Yoongi and Suran laughing, talking. They were so casual with each other.

“Women have a strong instinct for things. Especially if something odd is going on—“ My eyes couldn’t detach themselves from what they were seeing. I took the last three sips of alcohol in my glass in one gesture, the image of Suran moving closer to whisper something in Yoongi’s ear constantly appearing, even with my eyes closed.

“—I followed my instinct. And I was right” I said, slowly taking a step towards the exit.

“Chakaman.” I felt a gentle grip on my wrist, which I freed myself from almost instantly.

“Joesonghamnida. I don’t feel so good.”

I left, not even sparing him one last glance.

Perhaps it was the alcohol. Perhaps not. But it seems like the demons I tried to burry a long time ago didn’t want to be forgotten after all.

—

Days went by faster than ever, today marked exactly a week since the turn over of positions between the production team. Park In Jung’s dismissal from the project caused a lot of controversies not just with the board members, but the crew, the sponsors and of course, In Jung himself. Needless to say, he didn’t take the situation very well. Not only was his reputation ruined, but the money he had to return to the sponsoring companies, let alone the long list of lawsuits he could possibly face soon.

Y/N, on the other hand, has been struggling to keep up with things that were new to her. And that didn’t only apply to the technical aspects of the job, there had been a lot of prejudice against her for being a woman, first and foremost. Her young age was another issue. People never failed to compare her to In Jung who was well branded in the industry, with over thirty years of experience on the feild and theory-wise. They couldn’t seem to grasp the idea of having a young lady with an unknown background and rookie experience to take over what In Jung left.

Sadly, Y/N herself too, didn’t think otherwise. Especially with the erratic, disorganized, unsystematic turn out of things since her supervision.

Yoongi’s POV

Above all the things I wouldn’t be willing to waste my time and patience on, incompetence and amateurism came first. Everything went by smoothly during Park In Jung’s Supervision. But I can’t say the same for Y/N. And I’m sure most people in here have a lot to say about that too. In a span of one week she had fired two of her staff, blaming them for their own incompetence and lack of effort towards their work. It made no sense to the rest of us. Those people hadn’t caused us any problems since the start of the production. Her unnecessary cuts and interferance with the Directors and other staff had established a significant amount of stress onto the entire team working on site.

“Cut, cut!—“ for the eleventh time in less than thirty minutes, she announces.

“Jinjja, can you please be more lively? We don’t have all day” every pair of eyes avoided hers, trying to hide their sour faces, not wanting to cause any more trouble.

“We won’t have all day if you keep making unecessary cuts” mummbled one of the contestants, who happened to have forgotten about the microphone attached on his body, announcing the remark he had made for everyone to hear.

“Mwo rago yo?” She said, leaving her original spot, advancing towards the young boy who was turning pale at the mistake he had made.

“Don’t they teach you manners before they send you here?” The disappearing distance between them horrified the poor boy. He could barely keep his head up.

“J-jo-joesonghamnida”

“Do you want to stay in this production?”

With what she had said, I felt a sudden urge to walk up to her and stop her from all this nonesense.

“P-please, don’t kick me out. I-I’m begging you” begged the young boy who was on the verge of tears.

“Jeongmal. Do you really think begging will do you any good at this point?”

“P-please maam....this is my last chance to prove myself. If I get kicked out from here, my company will fire me. My parents have invested all their money to send me here...please” disregarding the number of people standing in front of him, without considering his pride or dignity any longer, the poor boy knelt down in tears, begging.

My eyes grew in shock, not believing the reality of the situation. I’ve had enough of this nonesense.

“That doesn’t change a th—“

“That’s enough.” Halfway through my attempts towards Y/N. Lee Jooheon was already standing behind her, his hands gently patting on her shoulder. One that she shrugged off unforgivingly. Daehan, one of the producers, assisted the boy up, taking him to the back, furthest away from her.

“Please mind your own business.” She said.

“Drink this. It might help you calm down” replied Jooheon, passing her an opened water bottle from the side.

“I said mind your own business.”

It wasn’t her voice, because she wasn’t yelling, but the sound of the bottle which landed harshly on the floor, followed by water splatter that disturbed everyone even more.

Realizing what she had done, she immediately walked out, leaving Jooheon startled.

Never in my whole life have I ever encountered a person as horrible as this. Eyeing where she had headed to, I followed quickly, wanting to talk to her in private. As I started closing in the gap between her back and I, I noticed her taking bigger steps, attempting to flee away from my presence. I wasn’t going to let her.

I grabbed her arm, gentle enough to avoid hurting her but harsh enough to stop her.

“Let go of me!”

I did what I was told, releasing my grip from her arm.

“What is wrong with you?” that questioned seemed to have caught her attention as she glued her eyes to mine. Something she hadn’t done in a long, long time.

“Excuse me?” If only looks could kill, I wouldn’t have a second to spare. But I wanted to deliver what I needed to say.

“All this time I thought you’ve changed that attitude of yours. I was wrong, you haven’t changed a bit. You’re still so careless, unreasonable. So selfish. Jeongmal, you can’t even be professional in front of your people. How do you expect them to respect you when you don’t even have any respect for yourself?”

Y/N’s POV

Unbelievable. How dare he talk to me in this manner? I waited for him to finish, saving all the things I needed to say until he was done with his own.

“Don’t you ever dare compare me to who I was in the past. You have no idea what I’ve gone through to get to where I am right now—“

Heavy, seething breaths came out from me in between.

“—What right do you have to talk about my past or present when you’ve done nothing significant to contribute to it?”

“Mwo rago yo?” His hands had travelled from his pockets to his hips, face sour as he said those words.

“You may have fed me, clothed me, and supposedly ‘cared’ for me in the past. Those are things any normal person can do without requiring much sacrifice. Especially for entitled people like you. But ask yourself Yoongi....have you ever done anything beyond those?”

“You knew why I had to end things with you, Y/N. Don’t act like you don’t.” It was irritating how he said it so calmly, just like before.

“Geurae. I was toxic. I was lazy. I spent most of your money, if not all, ruined your reputation more than necessary—“

“—but I loved you—“

I took a quick pause, not to get myself together, but just to breathe for a second.

“—you know what the difference is between the both of us?—“

“—I was there for you through the worst days of your life. When you were yelling and not calm, when you were slacking more than succeeding. Even when you were tired and barely paid attention to me. When your so called career was only on thin ice, with cracks in almost every corner of it. I was there for you through it all.....you, on the other hand—“

“—tossed me on the streets like garbage.”

His expressions were unreadable. But I didn’t care to understand them anyway. I only wanted to say what I should’ve told him a long time ago.

“Do you even know what sacrifices I had to make just to stay by your side?—“

“—Even just once, did you ever come to think of how hard I struggled for you too?—“

A disappointing yet satisfied smirk curled upon my lips.

“—I thought so.”

—

After the confrontation Yoongi and I had, I didn’t find any reason to stay on site, I need rest until the morning. Soojin had called it a day, announcing that the shoot will continue tomorrow.

My head was throbbing mercilessly, and my body ached to be laid down and eased, yet, somehow, I couldn’t. So I got up, dragging every unwiling part of my body towards the storage room at the back, grabbing one of the boxes I had kept at the top shelf. I took off the lid as soon as I sat it on top of my bedside table, revealing a bundle of letters and pictures that had been untouched for five years. Going through the bundle of letters, scanning through each piece of stationary paper until I found the one I was looking for.

“This”

Opening the letter slowly, my heart sank, remembering the state I was in while writing this. The handwriting was barely recongizeable, some of the letters were smudged; the ones on which my tears fell on. I cleared my throat unecessarily as I started reading the letter in silence.

“..........even during the last moments of us being together, there was nothing else I could say except that I loved you still. There was so much that I kept inside, so much that I still wanted to tell you but in the end, could not. For now, I only have one wish; someday, somehow, if the world is kind enough...I hope our paths will cross again, so I have a chance to say this, the things I failed to tell you;

Goodbye, my love. I hope I see you again when time is better for the both of us

And if not—then, this, the things I hope to tell you;

Hello, my love. I hope the world is kinder to us this time.”

I stared at this piece of paper with nothing but empty, foolish words. What was I thinking? Was thinking even done at all?

Andwae. Who was I to blame for denying the reality of what was happening before my very eyes?

I knew then, and I know now....the world wasn’t always kind enough.

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marlahey · 6 years

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we stumbled in the dark; i knew we’d be alright (part three)

a shawn mendes rpf fic rating/warnings: standard teen language; references children and illness (sorry this keeps going to sad places) misc notes: thank you so much for all the love – I have never gained so many followers in such a short amount of time! please reblog/drop in my inbox/tag any reactions with wsitd. any feedback is really loved and appreciated. I have a paper due this week, so have a super long update to tide you over. and because I want to know if anyone actually reads these notes; a question with no context: ‘queen’ or ‘champagne birthday’? also how much does everyone love the new album? I can’t stop listening to it. (previously; start at part one here)

lisbon; now Shawn’s a little superstitious when it comes to new venues.

He’d deny it up and down out loud, but you’ve now spent enough time in his company to know the truth. You have to carefully avoid laughing while he places a worn pick in the exact centre of B stage, or getting distracted when he always hums Life Of The Party with his acoustic before any other song, his feet dangling off the edge while he waits for the crew to finish setup. “Is that even on the setlist?” you ask, though you know the answer: of course it is.

Shawn’s smile is a little rueful as he scrubs a hand through his hair. “I just want to remind myself to remember, you know? Where I started.” You throw your arms out in the cavernous arena. “You mean you didn’t spend your childhood in concrete stadiums made to seat twenty thousand people?” There is a particular kind of joy you get in making Shawn laugh that hasn’t really faded over time, though it’s less of a surprised pinch in your stomach than a warm glow, now. He shakes his head a little, his you’re ridiculous face. “Nah, can’t say I did. Pickering was missing out.” You let your grin spin out as you do a little circle there in front of him at the floor edge of the stage, on the other side of the metal grate. It’s just high enough that you’d have to stretch your arm to touch him, if you wanted. “I can see why you love it.” “Is it big enough for you?” Shawn asks, and you stop, confused. You find him on his feet, leaning down towards you with his hand outstretched. You know he’s strong enough to pull you onto the stage; you’re a little more doubtful of your own ability to balance on the only foothold available: the barrier. “C’mon El, I won’t let you fall.” The trust me is implicit; you can see the question in Shawn’s eyes, behind his grin. All you can do is dig your foot between the pipes and take his hand, and pretend that it’s Shawn hauling you across two feet of empty space that caused your stomach to summersault a little. It’s further than probably either of you realized; you land unsteady on your feet and then Shawn’s hands are there, on your waist, keeping you upright. His necklace clangs against your forehead while your nose presses into his sternum. Your heart is hammering a little unsteady in your ears. At least, you think that’s yours. “You’re lucky,” you mutter, uncurling your fingers from his shirt. “Ava would have killed us both.” Shawn exhales against your hair, a faint laugh. You remember the flight and pull back as normally as possible. “What were you saying before? Big enough?” He blinks, and then his smile is wide and familiar and you’re sure you imagined something off in his face. Shawn steers you by the shoulers to face out from the stage, right at centre. There’s already a white x of tape at your feet to mark where the mike stand is meant to go. “This,” he says, and you follow the line of his gesturing hand out to the sea of empty seats. “Everything the light touches is our kingdom?” you ask, just to make him laugh again. “Not unless you think Queen is about you,” Shawn says. “And I wouldn’t let you sully Mufasa’s reputation with such a lie.” You wince and you’re suddenly glad he’s still looking out and not at your face. There’s a memory there you’ve tried to forget. “No, just hang on. Stay here.” His hands leave your shoulders as Shawn hops off the stage with infuriating ease and vaults over the barrier. “Show off!” you call after him, and from here you can see his shoulders shake a little. Shawn turns around in the centre of the standing floor. Even in the middle of nothing, or even in the middle of everything, you’d always be able to find him. It’s a fact you’ve resolved never to examine too closely. “What do you think?” Shawn asks, looking amused that you still have no idea what he’s talking about. But you indulge him anyway, pulling your eyes away from him to properly look around. Alone, the arena feels even more massive than before. You think back to that first concert in Ottawa, crammed up against Ava and hundreds of other bodies. Though you’ve traveled across two countries with Shawn doing exactly this, you’ll never know what it’s like to throw your voice out and have twenty thousand people send theirs back. “It’s huge,” you tell him, as if it weren’t obvious. “Sometimes I still can’t believe you do this every night.” Shawn’s smile is that pleased, humble one. Fondness for him wraps around your ribs. Shawn lopes forward, draping his arms over the grate and leaning forward to speak as though you’re the pop star. It’s a strange thought. “In Montreal,” he says, “You told me that you like to visit places places that make you feel small. Like the ocean.” His lips lift in a teasing smirk. “Well, smaller.” You’re so busy wracking your brain that you don’t even respond to the dig at your height. “Montreal? But we won’t go there till…” You trail off. “You mean, Montreal almost two years ago?” “You don’t remember?” Shawn’s tilted his head, looking up at you in vague disbelief. “On the bus, before the show.” “I do,” you assure him. You have to grapple with the truth of what you’re about to say. “I just...I had no idea you did.” God, is that horrible? But Shawn doesn’t look upset. “Wasn’t that like, the day after we met?” You have to make a joke before a carefully controlled part of you freaks out. “I can barely remember what we ate yesterday.” It’s that you’re ridiculous face again. “Tims. I think your exact words were, timbits are a Canadian institution and if you don’t eat this, you’re no longer allowed to tell people that’s Toronto’s skyline on your arm.” It’s been a while since Shawn’s made you flush in embarrassment and endearment at the same time. You cross your arms, feeling petulant and silly. “I stand by that statement. We were about to leave the country for four months! I even gave you the last chocolate one. I can’t believe you almost gave it up.” “Yeah, and there was only jelly-filled left.” “You hate jelly-filled,” you remind him. Two can play the memory game. “So do you, Lenny.” Ava’s nickname, even teasing, is so strange coming from his mouth. This stalemate is a lot more loaded than a conversation about timbits ought to be, in your opinion. But Shawn is clearly trying not to laugh and you’re losing the fight against a smile. “Let’s go you two!” Mike barks from offstage. “If you think I’m setting up all this equipment by myself you’ve got another thing coming.” “Duty calls,” you say. The moment is broken and you can’t decide if you’re disappointed or relieved. “Shouldn’t you be rehearsing, superstar?” Shawn makes a face. “You know I hate it when you call me that.” You just smirk at him. “Fair’s fair.”

toronto; then Hannah: So I have a surprise for you. You: Ooh tell me. The tour left Montreal at sometime past midnight, arriving at a Toronto hotel at dawn. You and tech crew fall into bed to sleep for a few more hours while Shawn and Ava rise for an early morning interview. They pick you up in the tour bus and all you can think about is how this might be the last time you ever get to see it. Hannah wants to FaceTime. Slide to answer. You scramble up from your bunk so fast you nearly hit your head. There’s only another few seconds to figure out if there’s anything revealing in the frame; thankfully it’s your phone instead of your laptop and only a blank section of wall is visible. You can see Shawn on the couch on the far side of the bus, earbuds in, engrossed in his journal. You scramble to plug your own headphones in. You should be fine. Hannah’s smile is suspiciously normal, though her eyes give her away.

“You know, I still can’t believe you got to bail on the last few days of school.” “I wouldn’t call getting an ear infection bailing, but fine.” You feel badly lying to your best friend, but it was Ava’s first condition: no one can know. “Where are you?” Hannah asks, peering into her screen. You try not shift uncomfortably. “Doctor’s office. Just getting the all clear.” “Good timing.” She’s just bursting at the seams to tell you something, but you can’t help a coil of dread that twists in your stomach. “So you know who’s playing the Air Canada Centre tonight?” He’s like three feet from me. “No,” you say, feigning ignorance. “Who?” “Shawn Mendes, idiot! Remember, that guy you’re always trying to get me to listen to?” “You–” You can barely choke out the words. “You have tickets to Shawn Mendes?” You don’t mean for your voice to crack – or project – like it does. Ava’s head jerks up from her desk right across the bunks. Paul, Shawn’s personal security, winces. Shawn’s pulled his headphones off with that classic, I just heard my name? look on his face. You clamp your hand over your mouth, which thankfully Hannah just takes as shock. Which it is. “Surprise! I’ve been dying of boredom since you’ve been gone so I finally just sat down and Youtubed him. He’s amazing! My mom got last minute tickets at her work in a raffle. The seats are shit but...” Ava’s eyebrows are shouting at you, get off the phone and Shawn’s getting up. This whole thing is too hilarious; you can barely suppress panicked laughter. “Han, I’m sorry they’re calling me in. I have to go!” “Okay, good luck! I’ll call you later with the details and we can meet there!” You drop your phone. “What,” you hiss, “the fuck?” “Language,” your sister says, more automatically than with actual disciplinary intention. Shawn snorts a laugh. The absurdity gives way to horror. You bury your head in your hands and groan. “This can’t be happening.” Andrew is surely going to kick you off the tour for this. “Don’t panic.” Ava clearly doesn’t share your concerns as she taps away at her phone. “Worse case scenario, you go to the concert with Hannah and then you go straight to her house from there. Saves me from having to drop you off.” No one says it, and you can’t either: the Winnipeg stop. “At least the seats are awful.” You finally look at Shawn, and then wince. “No offence. I mean, it’ll be amazing from wherever.” He laughs. “You’re trying to save this and it’s not working.” You exhale. “I’m just glad she doesn’t have a meet and greet package. Pretending I haven’t seen you live before is one thing. I don’t know if I’ll be able to fake having never met.” Shawn recoils dramatically. “Are you doubting my acting abilities?” It’s your turn to snort. Even though it’s only been a few days, the thought of missing him is an ache, so deep and wide you have to push yourself away from its edge. Please don’t let this be the last time I see you. The bus pulls into the Air Canada Centre. You can’t move. As if on cue, Ava’s phone rings. “Oh Mrs. Marshall, so nice to hear from you! Mhmm, yes she’s feeling a lot better now.” Your sister sticks her head out the doors, and then nods at Paul. “Ready you two?” he asks, and it occurs to you – like it had the first night you met Paul – that he could probably very easily haul you anywhere, whether you were ready or not. But as it stands, you sling your purse over your shoulder and nod. Keeping up with the strides of your bee-lining sister and two men who clear six feet isn’t easy, but there are no frenzied screams. You’re safe. “Of course, Elle would love to have dinner with Hannah before the show. I can just drop her off– oh yes, that’s perfect.” Ava ignores your attempts to disaster wave as everyone troops behind her through the arena. “She’ll see you at six. Great. Bye!” At your affronted expression, your sister rolls her eyes. “You’ll survive. But you’ll definitely need to change – you’re going to a concert, not the farmer’s market.” “My avocado shirt resents that!” Shawn is smiling like he’s trying not to. “It’s a great shirt.” “See?” You gesture at Shawn and force down a blush. “The pop star approves.” “The pop star,” Ava says, pointing you both into the dressing room in the next hall, “wore khakis and Vans until Serena sorted out his wardrobe.” You and Shawn look at each other. You can’t decide whether or not you’re allowed to laugh, until Paul intones, “You’re gonna need some ice for that burn, kid.” Twenty-five minutes later, you’re in the room adjacent to Shawn’s, wearing the only dress in your poorly packed emergency travel bag, your sister’s leather jacket, a hasty smokey eye and lip gloss, and are trying (and failing) to fasten a third bracelet with your left hand. “Need help?” You whirl around to find Shawn, clearly ready. His hair is shinier, the curl slick, dark skinny jeans paired with a grey button down, rolled up to reveal his guitar tattoo and his watch. You have to blink to reconcile him with the Shawn from an hour ago, slouched in a hoodie into which he burrowed like a turtle. He blinks, like he’s doing the same. Embarrassment feels like a default reaction at this point. “Um, yes. Please.” You meet in the centre of the room and you hand Shawn the small string of black marbles, holding out your wrist. “Thanks.” “Don’t thank me yet,” Shawn says. His fingers are warm on your skin in the room that is just a touch cold. Do not be weird. All you can smell is his cologne. The clasp doesn’t click at first; he swears under his breath and your stomach jumps. “Language,” you half-whisper, desperate to be rid of the butterflies. Shawn’s silent laugh shakes his shoulders. The marbles clink together. “God El,” he mutters. “Stop that. This is precision work we’re trying to accomplish here.” No one’s condensed the name you buried with your parents into one syllable before. Shawn finally manages the bracelet; for a moment he doesn't move and you take it to admire his swallow again. You wonder if it always looks like it’s in flight, if that’s why he put it on his hand, so it’s always in motion. You want to ask him how you find home without a place, when most of the people who make up your home are gone. “I’m amazing.” Shawn’s victorious grin as he steps back is so ridiculous you can’t help but smile back. “I should just call it a night right now.” “Please don’t,” you say. “Hannah would never forgive me for introducing her to your music if you bailed.” You pick up your bag and point at him. “And yes, I introduced her to you. Don’t let it go to your head.” You have no idea where all this sudden confidence is coming from. Maybe it’s just all the energy you’ve amassed from being stuck on a bus and in dressing rooms for hours at a time. Maybe it’s delayed reaction from the fact that you’ve just spent the last four days with one of the most famous teens in the world and you haven’t made a complete idiot of yourself. Or maybe, he’s as real of a person as you never let yourself believe before. There’s so much you wish you could say to him, because this might be your last chance, but you can hear Ava’s shoes from down the hall. “Thank you Shawn.” You can only smile and hope that’s enough. “Wait, El–” He stops. “That’s okay, right?” You shake your wrist. The bracelet holds. You hold it up, but Shawn shakes his head. “I mean– El. It’s okay I call you that?” Your heart’s doing something strange inside your chest. “Of course it is.” You’re suddenly torn between laughing and crying. His smile is so wide it’s hard to take in all at once. “I’ll see you soon,” Shawn says, like he’s certain. You flash back to Ottawa. The gaping space without him is open beneath your feet. “Have fun.” Ava is making a we gotta go wave at you. So you let her pull you out of the doorway, and even though your last glance at Shawn is of him smiling, you pretend that that the look in his eyes is because he’s sad to see you go. * You meet Hannah on the steps of the arena. By some miracle you make it through dinner without falling apart and confessing to this whole wild charade. Security is tighter than you’ve ever seen at an event here; parents stick close to their merch-covered kids and teens and your heart aches a little. Hannah clutches at your arm, chattering in your ear. “I think my favourite is Ruin–” “Excuse me, girls?” You both turn to find a middle aged woman hand in hand with a little girl, who has two tiny clear tubes extended from her My Little Pony backpack to wrap around her face and nose. You jerk your eyes back up to the mother, afraid you’re staring. “Clara and I had special passes to meet Shawn before the show but I’m afraid we can’t stay. Would you like them? We’re not–“ The woman’s smile wavers a little. “We’re not feeling too well. You can have our seats as well, if you’d like to be closer to the front?” You recognize the look on Clara’s face. She’s distraught, but clearly holding it together for her mother. You remember being close to her age. You remember seeing that face in the mirror. Your throat feels so tight that at first, you can’t speak. “Oh no,” you start, “We couldn’t–“ “Thank you so much!” If Hannah can read your horrified glare, she ignores it in favour of grinning brightly at the woman and accepting the pass from around her neck. Clara silently holds out hers to you; her nails are sparkling. You’ve never wanted anything less in your life. You’d never be able to look Shawn in the eye again. “What’s your name sweetheart?” Clara’s mother takes her daughter’s pass, pulling the card from its plastic case. She's looking at you expectantly, but there’s something soft in her eyes, a kind of motherly understanding, as though she can see how awful you feel. “Ellie,” you manage. The woman just nods, scrawling something in pen on the back of the pass. She takes Hannah’s and does the same. “There you go,” she says. You take yours automatically. “Just in case they give you any trouble at the doors.” Her expression is resigned, as though this is the best she can make of whatever situation she’s been given, but her sincere smile crinkles the corners of her eyes. You’re so ashamed of yourself that you can barely keep her gaze. “The tickets are in there too. Have fun, okay?” “Thank you!” You stare at Clara’s backpack until she and her mom are swallowed by the crowd. “Oh my god Ellie can you believe–” “We shouldn’t have done that.” You’re a lot calmer than you thought. There’s a deeper, angrier reaction somewhere further down, but you can’t bring yourself to have a full blown fight with your best friend in the middle of a concert venue. “Han, they–” “They weren’t gonna use them! You heard her, Ellie. You were seriously ready to pass up an actual meet and greet with Shawn Mendes?” You open your mouth, but Hannah has clearly had enough of this conversation, and turns her attention to the pass. “Oh my god, we only have ten minutes to get there! God, where are we supposed to be?” While Hannah flags down a passing security guard, you force yourself to take a deep breath. And another. Don’t deprive her of this chance just because you can’t bear the thought of seeing Shawn again. But that’s only the reason you’re using to coax your feet to follow your best friend; you can’t help but think that Clara deserves this more. You recognize the guard at the top of the dressing room hall, where a barrier’s gone up and teens and parents line up and peer down towards the room you left Shawn in not two hours ago. Your heart hammers, harder even than it did when you first met. Cameron’s eyebrows furrow as the other guard explains the pass swap; you make as subtle of a wave at Hannah and an I’m sorry as you can. Cameron looks from you to Hannah, who eagerly thrusts her pass at him while the two girls Shawn’s just seen, flushed and giggling, make their way back up the corridor. You can see Paul now, standing outside the dressing room door. Cameron lets the other girls back through the barrier towards the main concourse hall. “Okay, go ahead you two.” Your steps feel like lead. Hannah is squeezing your arm so tightly it almost hurts. Paul’s surprise is – like most of Paul’s on duty expressions – almost imperceptible, but it’s too late for any sort of communication, because you’re in the doorway and Hannah’s practically pushed you ahead of her into the room. Shawn looks up; some irrational part of your brain screams at you to run. You have no idea what you look like, but you feel trapped. You’re sure this is it. Hannah is going to find you out and everything will be ruined. Until he smiles, stands, and turns first to her instead of you. “Hi.” Hannah is very rarely speechless. Some distantly vindictive part of you is strangely smug to see her this way. “Oh my god, hi.” She goes to hug him and you look away instinctively, flipping over your platinum pass as Hannah proceeds to find her voice and explain her mother, the raffle and– Plat pass for Ellie. Don’t let go of that big heart. – Alice

“I just love your music so much.” “Oh thank you! That’s so sweet.” “I’m Hannah, by the way.” “Hi Hannah, it’s so nice to meet you.” Your best friend giggles – the kind of giggling she flirts with. Your stomach turns. “Someone just gave us their passes! Her daughter was sick. I still can’t believe it.” You can tell without having to lift your head that Shawn’s looking at you. Can he see your hand shaking? Can he see your guilt? The truth of what you’ve done slams back into your ribcage; Clara’s determinedly okay expression is burned behind your eyes. It’s hard to tell in the moment that if your secret didn’t entirely depend on your ability to fake enthusiasm, that if Hannah wasn’t standing right there, if you’d have let yourself cry. You can’t remember the last time you cried. You really need to stop letting the almosts be with him. “I’m excited for the show,” you blurt, grasping at the memory of Ottawa to keep you grounded. Shawn’s eyes are searching for something in your face. You can’t tell which one of you is currently worse at this ‘we’ve never met’ game. Panic squeezes in your chest. Just keep pretending. “I can’t believe you’re really here.” “I’m definitely real,” Shawn says, smiling not quite the way he had four days ago. From outside, Paul tosses a quick, perfunctory wave into the room. Time’s up. Shawn nods, but looks back at you. “I can even prove it.” Here at last is something you don’t have to fake. You’re not sure what to blame on the innocuous fact that you’ve never hugged Shawn. Both Ava’s sisterly concern and Andrew’s constant watchfulness flash through your mind. But you don’t have time to overthink it, stretching into the space Shawn leaves as he bends down to meet you. His cologne’s gone softer against all the perfumes and deodorants of everyone he’s probably already hugged tonight, but you can still catch traces of it. You want to close your eyes and squeeze a goodbye around his ribs, but you don’t. Shawn’s arms reach nearly all the way round your back and your waist; his hands slide down your elbows, dropping from your wrists as he pulls back. The marbles of your bracelet clink and go silent. “Have a great time, guys.” Shawn’s smile sweeps from you to Hannah and it’s almost a relief. “Thank you for coming.” “Bye!” Hannah waves, her hand clamping around your arm like a vice, and you’re being dragged away from Shawn for a second time. You don’t look up to see his face. Hannah is practically vibrating beside you. She skips forward, hopping through the open metal barrier, but it swings shut before you can follow. “I’m sorry miss,” Cameron says when you gape up at him, his lips twitching on the last word. He has his hand to his earpiece. “I’m told you dropped something in the dressing room?” Your face flames as people gawk. You hurriedly pat yourself down – bag, phone, rings– “I’m sorry, I don’t–” You don’t know he’s talking about, but Cameron just nods down towards Paul, who is beckoning you back. You’re tempted to bolt back to him just to escape the particular awfulness of public humiliation, but you manage a fast walk instead. Paul just points into the room. “You have thirty seconds, Shawn.” Your eyes dart around: his jacket, his guitar, a water bottle. When they finally land on Shawn, you can only stare as he holds up your marble bracelet. “How–” “I saw that look on your face,” he says. Now that you’re alone, you allow yourself to really look at him. It seems like concern in his gaze, almost urgent in its openness, but there no time to process it. “When Hannah said someone gave you those passes. I just–” Shawn’s mouth twists, a shadow of regret, as though he wants to say more. “I saw it.” Well that answers that question. “I didn't want them,” you blurt, feeling helpless against fear of his judgement. ”Do you know her name?” Shawn asks, and you’re too dumbfounded to pull away when he reaches for your wrist and returns your bracelet. “The girl?”

“Clara.” Shame presses tears into your eyes. You blink and blink and none fall. “She’s so little,” You say in a rush. “She had oxygen. Shawn, I–” “It’s okay, El.” He hasn’t let go of you yet. You don’t want to look at him, but you’re still powerless against his pull. You see the same soft smile from that very first night, when he was close enough to touch. “It’s okay.” “Time to go,” Paul says. You turn to leave; Shawn’s fingers catch on yours as he drops your hand. Paul looks down at you, his face seemingly as impassive as ever. “Deep breath now, little one.” You force it. You can see clearly again. Paul nods, and you follow in his shadow back to Hannah, and hold up your wrist. “My bracelet fell off,” you tell her, loud enough that it’s audible to the girls still staring with something like vague suspicion in their eyes. “He just helped me get it back on.” It’s only a half lie. At least, you’re fairly certain. Your best friend makes a noise that can only be described as a squeal. “God he is so sweet!” You move through most of the night on autopilot. It’s probably a credit to Shawn’s showmanship that you can, at least for a while, forget whose seats you occupy in the 100 section of the arena. After TNHMB, Shawn riffs a little on his guitar while the crowd waits with baited breath. “So I’ve already met a ton of really amazing people tonight.” Hannah squeezes your hand as she screams. “But my team let me know that there was someone super special whose been in the hospital lately, and who really wanted to be here but couldn’t make it.” Your heart leaps up to your throat. “And I thought, because Toronto has to be one of the most amazing cities in the world–” Shawn smiles when the crowd drowns him out. “We might all send this little girl some love.” He waits for the screaming to die down. “So Toronto, if you have a cellphone light, please pull it out. Clara, I don’t know if you’ll see this, but this is Never Be Alone, and it’s for you.” The tears make it hard to sing. You’ve never asked Shawn about this, in the weeks and months since. No video recording captured it with clarity, but some people are sure that in the final measures of the song, as Shawn pulled out his earpiece and listened as he did every night, that there were tears in his eyes, too. * Four days later, you lay on your stomach on Hannah’s bed while her iTunes shuffles in the background. You’ve successfully stopped flinching every time Shawn’s voice floated through the speakers. Ava had dropped your bag off with a hug and an, “I’ll let you know.” It’s half a fear of being annoying and half a fear of confirming your own disappointment that keeps you from texting her at all. “Oh my god!” Hannah’s shriek nearly makes you drop your phone. “Look!” She shoves her own phone under your nose. It takes a minute, but eventually you realize you’re looking at Shawn’s instagram story, where Hannah’s thumb has paused on a still of Shawn’s feet walking through a pristine white hall. surprising someone special! She clicks forward; your hand flies to your mouth at the sight of Clara, looking even tinier than she had the night of the concert, sitting up in bed. Her shock and her tears as Shawn walks into her room, someone else recording now, takes your breath away. “I’m so jealous of this girl,” Hannah says. “Can you imagine getting to meet Shawn by yourself?” “She’s in the hospital, Han.” “I’d put myself in the hospital if I got to meet him.” Thankfully your phone chimes then, saving you from having to come up with a reply. Ava: Get somewhere private. Calling in two minutes. Is it possible to have a nerves induced heart attack? “Ava’s calling,” you say, lurching to your feet. “I’ll be right back.” Hannah lifts her hand in a wave, engrossed in her phone again. You dash into the hall, down the stairs, and out the back door to the backyard, forcing yourself to sit on the steps of her deck. Ava wants to FaceTime. Slide to answer. You have to close your eyes for a moment before you accept. But it isn’t Ava’s face that focuses into view: it’s Shawn. Your mouth falls open as you look frantically around the yard, as if anyone else were here besides the squirrels squabbling on the back fence. You look back. He’s still there. “Shawn?” It comes out a little squeakier than you’d have hoped. His grin stretches from ear to ear. “El, hey! Busy?” “Um, no?” You don’t have time to untangle your wilting, half-up bedroom hair. You don't even know if you can hold your phone up without shaking. “Someone wanted to say hello,” Shawn says. You catch the blur of a white room as he passes the phone to someone else. Alice, leaning down to get her daughter in the frame, just smiles as you clamp your hand over your mouth. “Hi, sweetheart.” Clara waves and you return the gesture with a trembling hand. “That was a really wonderful thing you did,” Alice says, her eyes bright. “We just wanted to say thank you. It means so much to us. ” “Shawn did all the work,” you croak. “I’m a terrible singer.” Clara giggles. You think you hear Shawn laughing just beyond the screen. “Still,” Alice’s smile is fond. “He’s even better for having people like you in his life.” “Thank you,” you whisper, because you don’t know what else to say. “I’ll pass you back now. Say goodbye to Ellie, Clara.” “Bye!” You don’t even realize you’re crying until you can’t see them anymore. “Oh no, El–” You wipe frantically at your eyes to find Shawn’s mouth downturned, his eyes apologetic. “I’m sorry, I never wanted you to–” “No!” You shake your head and let out a disbelieving laugh. “No, Shawn. Please, I’m fine. I’m better than fine. Thank you for this.” You try to push your reassurance through the screen. “You just made my whole week.” Shawn’s relieved smile makes your heart stutter. This boy is seriously going to give you a heart attack. “Good. I have a question, before I go. Av looks like she’s going to rip her phone out of my hand.” You snort. “Classic Ava.” Shawn glances off camera, and then back. He makes a face like he’s trying to be serious, and failing. “Do you have a raincoat?” The question takes a second to compute. “Do I have–? Um, yes?” You don’t know why it comes out like a question. Fucking hell, Ellie. “I have a raincoat.” His grin fills your tiny screen. “Make sure you bring it to Seattle.” (part four)

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes fic #shawn mendes imagine #shawn mendes writing #shawn mendes blurb #god this is so long #please let me know what you think!#part 3 aka how many times can I whisper 'I''m gonna throw up' during scenes I write myself #the answer is many #mine: fic #wsitd

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fallinglntokillugon · 6 years

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KilluGon Fanfics Galore Revisited

It has been about 6 months since I looked at this and, well, I have to add some more... How many large-scale projects have I made for myself? How many will I start, finish, or continually think about before sleeping at night?

Here, we will add 5 new KilluGon stories/concepts that I’ve been thinking about! We will also add in some updates (like ratings!) to the older 4 stories and see what’s happening with them... If you like one in particular, let me know~

0f Fishing R0ds and Y0-y0s (working title)

Rock Band AU, KilluGon (T-M)

16-yo bassist Killua is sick and tired of playing lifeless music in the pop-rock band made up of his brothers. After a final incident, Killua runs off to the pier to cool his head by watching street performances. There, he finds a boy his age singing with an electric guitar... and a laptop? Entranced, Killua instantly falls in love with the spiky-haired teen who is able to write such heartfelt songs and perform with such passion. Can Killua and Gon create a two-man band that can compete with the band of brothers Killua left behind?

Alluring Secret [Summary Completed]

Guardian Angel AU, KilluGon and creepy one-sided HisoGon (T+-M)

Genderless Angel Killua (a ‘he’ for the sake of easier writing) is wounded after failing his mission to protect his assigned human. Gon finds Killua and nurses him back to health. Killua falls in love and asks Oracle Alluka to make him a human male. Returning to Earth as a mysterious teen years later, Killua elopes with Gon on the day Gon was to be wed to Hisoka (for money reasons). This tale follows the tragic story of the Vocaloid song of the same name.

DV AV [Summary and Chapter Summaries Completed]

College AU, KilluGon, GonBisky, and CookieBisky (M+++)

In Gon’s freshman year of community college, he and Killua used to be dating. During his sophomore year, it turned into an abusive relationship that Gon had to be saved from. Now Gon and Bisky are dating, but Gon can’t help but want to return to Killua, who is out for revenge. Flip between the present and the past to learn what will happen as the three move towards a future where all Bisky wants is for Gon to smile brightly again.

Shiro-Kuro AU [Concept Completed]

Black and White AU, ShiroKuro KilluGon and KuroShiro KilluGon (M+)

Kuro Killua and Shiro Gon’s love creates a tear between their universe and the parallel one of Shiro Killua and Kuro Gon’s. Read as Shiro Killua the tsundere prince and Kuro Gon the innocent angel must deal with Kuro Killua the unemotional asshole and Shiro Gon the scheming slut. Pure and lewd collide with every stand-alone adventure these four have~

Hikari-Yami AU [WIP Plot]

Light and Dark AU, Canon KilluGon and Nega KilluGon (T-M)

During a date, Canon Killua and Canon Gon run into a Chimera Ant. In order to kill it, they chase it through a strange rift it created. The Canon pair find themselves stuck in the Nega Universe, where they meet Nega Gon, a brooding emo, and Nega Killua, a crybaby elite assassin, only to learn that the Nega timeline is much darker than their own. Follow the hopeful and the hopeless as the Canons try to solve some the Negas’ problems before finding a way back home.

Partners in Crime [Half the Chapter Summaries Completed]

Robber AU, KilluGon and LeoPika (M)

An action-packed, drama filled “cops and robbers” extravaganza based loosely off the song of the same name. Follow the animal-masked robbers as they pull off robberies, heists, and paid missions to live through each day to eventually reach their dreams!

I Would Never Betray Him [Data Files Lost]

Alternative Timeline, KilluGon (M+)

After Gon and Killua finish a Hunter mission, instead of going straight back to Kite’s house, they decide to go on a quick adventure together. But, the fun is cut short when Killua thinks that his love for Gon will never be realized… unless he makes it painfully clear.

Love Below Heaven: Yin-Yang Souls [Never Started]

Angels and Devils AU, KilluGon (PG+-M)

Gon is an angel who wants to follow in his father’s footsteps as a Guardian, an angel that goes down to Hell to help with devil relations. Killua is a devil who tries out for the new Guardian Trade Program. Can this angel and devil help create peace between Heaven and Hell? (A loose continuation of my One Piece AU of the same name.)

Maid Killua’s Lessons [Never Started]

Master and Maid AU, KilluGon (M+)

Killua is contracted out to the Freecss Household in order to teach Young Master Gon how to handle relationships with women. Even though he’s dressed as a maid, Killua decides that instead of getting Gon ready for marriage, he’s going to take Gon for himself.

#killugon #killua x gon #killua zoldyck #killua #gon freecss #hunter x hunter #gon #fanfiction #fanfic #fanfiction ideas #I super duper want them to be happy

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bastardnev · 6 years

Text

That Guy Next Door

im finally fuckin posting this dad au fic im losing it, i meant to post this earlier but tumblr kept glitching so!!! here it is!!

anyways as i’ve said a few times already, this fic will be updating on a weekly basis, which means that there’s gonna be one new chapter every friday until all of them have been uploaded. i hope you all enjoy this fic as much as i enjoyed writing it!!

link to ao3

tagging: @tylerblacks @joonhobi @rivela @aliciasfox @sailor-slam-dunk @kidvoodoo @smolsammich @simulated-heat @douglas-leon-michael (lemme kno if you wanna be added to my tag list!!)

Chapters: 1/16 Fandom: World Wrestling Entertainment, Professional Wrestling Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Mustafa Ali/Pac | Adrian Neville, Other Relationship Tags to Be Added Characters: Mustafa Ali, Pac | Adrian Neville, Wade Barrett, Original Child Character(s), Other Character Tags to Be Added Additional Tags: Rating will go up, wink wonk, Parenthood, Single Parents, Post-Divorce, Alternate Universe - Parents, god for a sec i didn't think there was a parent au tag on here and i was gonna be so confused, First Meetings, Other Additional Tags to Be Added Summary:

"yo" "do me a favor when you get home" "i can see there’s someone new moving in next door" "introduce all of us to him plz n thx"

Single parent Neville was convinced that he would never find love again following his divorce. Little did he realize just how much these four texts from Wade would change his life.

The more that time passed, the more it seemed like Neville was never going to be able to escape this stupid little office.

He was never going to get away from his desk. From his computer. From his phone that never seemed to want to stop ringing for thirty goddamn seconds. From the sounds of his co-workers typing away on their own keyboards. From his boss who almost always seemed to have some new, pointless assignment for him to complete whenever he passed by his cubicle. Such were the woes of working for such a big company…

He told himself that this job was only temporary. Every day he would remind himself that he was only going to be there until he was back on his feet following his divorce. As difficult as this was, it wasn’t going to last forever.

But then a time where he was financially secure enough to start looking for a different job arose, and Neville didn’t jump on the opportunity to leave. He had wanted to stick around for awhile longer to make sure he had completed everything, so that the poor bastard who took this secretary -- no, administrative assistant -- position after him wouldn’t be swamped with missed deadlines and unfinished projects. He didn’t mind staying for a few more days.

Those days turned to weeks. Those weeks turned to months. Those months turned to years.

It had been almost three fucking years since he had the chance to quit, and yet there Neville was, still typing out emails and arranging appointments for higher-ups who couldn’t give any less of a shit about him if they tried.

Sometimes he would stop while in the middle of working, staring intently at his mouse cursor, debating just walking out and leaving this hell behind and never looking back. No one appreciated him. It would make more sense to go elsewhere, wouldn’t it? Where he wouldn’t have to work unnecessarily long hours just to earn a decent pay? Where a boss would actually seem grateful for the work that he puts in?

It was as he would have these thoughts, however, that he would catch sight of the pictures resting next to his computer monitor -- those of two little girls, smiling at the camera and looking so full of life.

His little girls.

The older one was Jennifer, though she was only ever called that when she was in serious trouble (which wasn’t often, now that Neville thought about it) -- otherwise, she was simply known as Jen. She was definitely more like her mother, from having the same light brown hair to the same headstrong personality. Though she was only nine, she was incredibly independent -- almost too independent, however, as she was often too stubborn to ask for help when she was in tough situations.

Then there was Daisy -- ‘Daddy’s favorite,’ as she claimed whenever Neville would do something nice for her (even if he had also done the same thing for Jen). She was six, and even at such a young age she was already showing signs of being just like her father. That is to say, she was becoming a bit of a smartass. True to the little sibling stereotype, she essentially lived to spite Jen, always making sure to say whatever it was she least wanted to hear just so that she could appreciate her over-the-top reactions.

These two lovely children were depending on him. Neville couldn’t quit and risk losing out on money when he knows that they’re counting on him to take care of them.

With that thought in mind, he continued typing.

If he was lucky, then Neville’s drive from the office back to his home was relatively short, the traffic scarce despite it technically being rush hour.

Unfortunately, that day was not his lucky day.

Despite never actually having met the driver of the minivan that he was stuck behind, Neville felt like he was deeply familiar with their personal life, considering the amount of bullshit on the back of it. There was a stick figure family decal on the back window -- a father, a mother, two little boys, and one little girl. Down on the bumper there were multiple stickers proudly announcing to the world that there were two honors students in the family. What about the third kid? Neville found himself thinking, fingers tapping impatiently on the steering wheel. Are they not good enough for a sticker?

His phone vibrated in the cup holder next to him, and he glanced down at it for a moment before focusing back on the road, pulling up a little once the traffic started to move. He heard the phone vibrate a second time. A third time. By the time the fourth vibration occurred, Neville looked back down at the device and took it in his hands, wondering just what in the hell was so urgent that it required sending that many messages.

Then again, considering that the only person who ever texted him nowadays was Wade, there was no way it was actually anything of substance.

Wade “Freeloader” Barrett: yo

Wade “Freeloader” Barrett: do me a favor when you get home

Wade “Freeloader” Barrett: i can see there’s someone new moving in next door

Wade “Freeloader” Barrett: introduce all of us to him plz n thx

Typical. Wade was once again trying to get Neville to do something for him. It seemed like all that Wade had done since moving into the downstairs apartment in Neville’s house was try to butter him up for something. That man truly has not changed since college…

Though Neville ribbed Wade for his tactics, even going as far as to jokingly refer to him as a freeloader in his phone, the truth was that he didn't have any negative feelings towards him at all. In fact, he was actually incredibly grateful for him. Wade had been employed when he moved into Neville’s home after his divorce, but he’d been laid off not too long after, and he’d had no success finding a job ever since. It seemed like every time things were looking up for him and he might have found something other than the occasional odd job, the position was always given to someone else, and as such he was never able to pay his share of that month’s rent.

He was always willing to babysit whenever Neville needed him to, however -- which was fairly often, seeing as his job sometimes required that he stay late at the office. Had it not been for him, Neville would have had to worry about paying a sitter on top of all of the bills and everything else. Difficult as things may be, he was glad to have a close friend like Wade.

Someone actually bought that house, though? Neville thought. It’s been on the market for ages. He could only vaguely remember the small family that used to live there before they abruptly moved because of the father’s job. Though the last thing that Neville wanted to do was give Wade what he wanted, he had to admit that he was just as curious as he was about this new neighbor…

Me: And why should I do that? Can’t you go over there yourself?

Wade “Freeloader” Barrett: your texting while you’re supposed to be driving??

Wade “Freeloader” Barrett: dangerous

Wade “Freeloader” Barrett: tsk tsk

Me: *you’re

Wade “Freeloader” Barrett: SHUT UP

Me: Also I’m in traffic, asshole. Now tell me why you can’t do it yourself?

Wade “Freeloader” Barrett: because i just woke up from a nap and have a killer headache and am in no mood to actually socialize

Me: What makes you think I’M in the mood to socialize? I just had a long day at work.

Wade “Freeloader” Barrett: because you’re the cuter one between the two of us and it would be better if he saw your pretty face instead of mine

Wade “Freeloader” Barrett: you could win over anyone with those eyes of yours

It was at that moment that Neville placed his phone back down in the cup holder -- partially because the traffic was beginning to move and he needed to start driving again, though mainly because he’d read enough. Wade always tried to compliment him whenever he was too lazy to do something for himself, and Neville was ashamed to admit that this strategy worked more often than not.

This time was going to be different, however. After a long day of typing away at his desk and going straight into bumper-to-bumper traffic, it was going to take a lot more than some sweet talking to get him to introduce himself to a total stranger.

Neville finally pulled into his driveway about fifteen minutes later, turning the car off and leaning back against the seat with a sigh. Somewhere along the way it had started raining, the droplets of rain tapping rhythmically against the windshield. He loved the rain -- that is, when he didn’t actually have to go walking through it. It was a short walk from the car to the front door. Even so, he was not looking forward to getting wet…

As he gathered his bearings, he took a quick look out of the passenger side window, and he noticed that there was a light on inside of the house next door, and there was an unfamiliar car parked in the driveway. So Wade was telling the truth when he said that there was a new neighbor. Wonder what their story is.

The neighborhood that Neville lived in wasn’t bad by any means, but he didn’t think that it was an area that anybody would want to willingly move into. Most of the residents tended to keep to themselves, the extent of their interactions with one another being a quick ‘hello’ and nothing more. Wouldn’t someone looking for a place to start their new life look for someplace more interesting? Whoever this new person was must have had no other options.

...Then again, it wasn’t like Neville really cared about what this new person thought. He had more important things to worry about then whatever was going on in their mind.

Neville resigned himself to his damp fate and exited the car, making sure to lock it before trekking through the rain and up the front stops until he reached the door. Despite it being closed, he could hear what sounded like a commotion inside -- just what he needed after the day he’d had. What are they fighting over now ? He clicked his tongue and opened the door, bracing himself for whatever the latest controversy was.

“Jen, you said yourself that you didn’t care if she ate your leftovers or not.” The first voice that Neville heard was that of Wade, who was clearly trying to mediate an argument between the two girls, standing in front of Jen while Daisy hid behind his back.

“I said I didn’t want them! I never said she could have them!” Jen had her arms crossed.

“I never ate them, though!” Daisy peeked out from behind Wade, clutching his shirt, dark brown curls falling over her face. “I swear! Why would I want something that you touched?”

“Uh… Hello?” Neville decided to speak up, prompting the three of them to look over in his direction.

“Daddy!!” Daisy let go of Wade and went charging towards him, now opting to hide behind him instead (and prompting a “What, am I not a good enough shield for you?” from Wade). “Jen’s bullying me again!”

“I am not!” Jen insisted. “She’s the one that did something wrong! She ate my food!”

Of all the ridiculous arguments that these two could have had, they had to have one over chicken tenders? Were fights over toys going out of style? “Okay, listen,” Neville started. “Jen, you did say that you didn’t mind if someone else ate them. And Daisy, you shouldn’t insinuate that anything your sister touches is dirty.”

Daisy blinked at him. Neville couldn’t imagine why she looked so confused, seeing as he made a perfectly good point.

“Nev,” Wade said. “She’s six. I don’t think she knows what ‘insinuate’ means.”

“Right… Okay, how about this -- don’t say that anything she touches is dirty. There, is that better?”

Daisy nodded this time. Neville knew her too well, though. It may appear as if she understood, but in reality she was plotting her next move. Chances are she had plenty more insults ready to unleash the moment that Neville’s back was turned.

Jen made a disgusted sound and stormed into the hallway, bounding up the stairs towards her room. Now that her enemy had disappeared, Daisy deemed it safe enough to emerge from hiding, heading towards the kitchen. Neville pushed his glasses up his nose as he watched her go. “How did that argument even start, anyway?” He asked.

“Hell if I know.” Wade shrugged. “I was minding my own business when Daisy came running in here claiming that Jen was going to kill her. Again.”

“Did she even eat the leftovers?”

“No, she didn’t.”

“Then who…” He squinted at Wade. “ You ate them, didn’t you?”

“...Maybe…”

“Of course you did.” Neville sat down on the couch, rubbing at his temples.

“What, did you expect me to speak up? Angry Jen isn’t fun to deal with. The last thing I wanted was to be on the receiving end of her wrath. She clearly got that gene from you.”

“Ha ha, very funny.”

Wade took a seat next to him. “Enough about that, though. What happened with the new guy next door?”

“I didn’t talk to him.”

“What?” He looked disappointed. “Not even after I asked you so nicely?”

“Trying to get me to do something for you by buttering me up isn’t always going to work, Wade. I told you that I had a long day today and I wasn’t up for introductions. I’ll get around to it when I’m not exhausted.”

Wade huffed, propping his feet up on the coffee table (and having them shoved off by Neville a few seconds later). “All I’m trying to do is help you get back out there…”

Neville looked at him, eyes narrow. “Excuse me?”

“Oh, did I say that out loud? Oops.” Wade was acting as if that were an accident, but it didn’t take a genius to figure out that he’d clearly meant for Neville to hear him.

“What do you mean that you’re trying to help me ‘get back out there’?”

“Well, y’know…” Wade began to play with his nails, avoiding Neville’s gaze. “I thought you and the cute new guy next door might want to chat for awhile, maybe hang out sometime, that’s all.”

“You-- Wait, you actually want me to date this guy? This guy who I’ve never even met? Are you kidding me?” Neville had learned so much about Wade in the years that they’d known each other, but never once had he shown any interest in trying to play matchmaker. “Why do you want this so badly?”

“I just thought it would be nice! I know you’ve been lonely lately--”

“And just how would you know that?”

“Nev, I’ve been your friend since college. I’ve been living with you ever since you and Marina split. The last few years have been rough for you romance-wise, and it’s obvious that it’s taken a toll on you.”

Neville swallowed at the mention of his wife’s name. “How do you know ?” He repeated, growing a little impatient.

“I feel like I hardly ever see you smile anymore,” Wade continued. “It’s not that you never smile, it’s just… genuinely happy smiles are pretty rare for you these days. I thought that maybe finding you a nice guy to hang out with would help lift your spirits a bit -- and who knows, something great could come out of this. You should give him a chance.”

Neville knew that he was probably being rude, but he still rolled his eyes, shaking his head and once again pushing his glasses up his nose. He knew that Wade didn’t mean any harm. He was one of the few truly good people that Neville knew, and he would never do anything to hurt him.

This, on the other hand, while it didn’t hurt him by any means, was on a whole different level. “Wade, listen… I understand that you’re just trying to help,” Neville started. “I appreciate that you’re looking out for me. But I know I’ve told you before that I’m not interested in finding a partner at the moment. I have a family to support, and I don’t have time to be fooling around with romance right now.”

“Okay…” Wade’s shoulders drooped. “Sorry if it seemed like I was forcing you into something that you didn’t want.”

“No need to apologize.” Neville stood up from the couch, stretching. “I gotta go get changed. These clothes are so damn uncomfortable.”

“It’s times like these where I’m almost glad I don’t work,” Wade commented, watching Neville as he made to leave the room. “Otherwise I’d have to wear stuff like that .”

“I envy you, I won’t lie.”

Neville arrived at the top of the steps and started to make his way down the hallway. He briefly stopped in front of the door to the girls’ room, knowing that Jen was most likely still stewing inside. He knew that she would get over it eventually, but it still bothered him knowing that she was angry with the wrong person. Maybe once she calms down we can tell her… Though Wade will probably be scared shitless while we do it.

He continued down the hall and made it to his own room, taking off his jacket and tossing it onto the bed. He was about to start undoing the buttons on his shirt when he noticed that the window was open, and he let out a little annoyed noise. Great, now the floor is wet…

It was when he went over to close it that he once again caught sight of the house next door -- in particular, his eye was drawn to the window. He could see that there was someone moving around inside, but he was only able to see his back. There he is, the man of my dreams… or so I’ve been told.

Neville wasn’t in the mood to be accused of being a creeper, so he quickly shut the window and closed the blinds, resuming his undressing. Whoever the hell this new guy was, he wasn’t interested in watching what he assumed were his dinner preparations (nor was he willing to strip right where he could see it).

For all the complaints that Neville had about his job, there was one thing about it that he did like -- the fact that he was able to work from home on Fridays.

He was set up at the kitchen table, lazily scrolling through the emails that were gradually piling up in his inbox. Most of them didn’t even concern him -- in the beginning they were about figuring out what time would work best for everyone for the next meeting, now most of them were people debating which day of the week would be better between Monday and Tuesday. I’m stuck in that office anyway regardless of the day, so what does it even matter? Neville thought to himself, taking a sip from his coffee mug as he went to work deleting some of the messages.

“What a sight to behold.” Neville looked up from the screen and found that Wade had entered the room. “You’re still sitting here working and drinking from that ‘World’s Okayest Dad’ mug. Don’t you think you should give yourself a break?”

“I already took my break earlier,” Neville replied just as he heard another chime ring out from his laptop -- the meeting would officially be on Monday, despite numerous complaints. Incoming shitstorm.

“Take another one. What’s stopping you? It’s not like anyone can tell that you’re not working.”

“They’ll tell when I’m not responding to any of their emails.”

“So if you don’t respond immediately after they send it to you then they’ll know that you’re slacking off? Sounds rough. Glad I’m not working there.”

“You’re not working, period .”

“Exactly, and who would want to with those regulations?” Wade went to the fridge and dug around inside until he came back with a bottle of water, unscrewing the cap and taking a sip. “Hey, where are the girls? I haven’t seen them all afternoon.”

“Outside in the yard.” Neville nodded his head in the direction of the back door. “I’m surprised they’ve been playing for so long without getting into a fight.” Right as Neville finished saying that, he heard a thud and the unmistakable sound of Daisy yelling “Ow!” “Ah, I see I spoke too soon.”

A few moments later, both girls stumbled into the kitchen through the back door. “Daddy, Daisy threw the ball over the fence again,” Jen complained, elbowing her sister in the side.

“Ow-- It wasn’t my fault! She was the one who threw it.”

“You said you were ready for me to throw it!”

“No I didn’t!”

“Yes you did! Daddy, didn’t you hear her say she was ready? She’s lying again--”

“Alright, alright, that’s enough,” Neville interrupted her before she could say anything more, and he pushed back his chair. “You two head back outside and wait in the yard. I’ll go get the ball for you.”

Jen and Daisy looked at each other before they both walked back outside, the two of them getting into a brief scuffle in the doorway since they couldn’t decide which of the two of them got to go through first (Jen ultimately won by reminding Daisy of who the older sibling was). Neville pinched the bridge of his nose once they were gone, letting out a sigh. “What am I going to do with them…”

“Well, you can start by getting their ball,” Wade said.

Neville made a little frustrated noise and stood up, though it was as he was about to leave that he noticed the cocky smirk on Wade’s face. “What’s up with you?”

“Nev, how did you get the ball the last time they threw it over the fence?” he asked, leaning back against the counter.

“Uh… I went into the yard and got it?”

“You realize you can’t do that anymore, right? Since there’s now someone living there. That’s trespassing.”

“What’s your point?”

“My point is that you’re going to have to get the new neighbor’s permission to go back there and get it. You two are finally going to meet.”

“Oh God, are you still on this?” Neville huffed. “I told you that I’m not interested in being in a relationship right now. Let it go .”

“I never said you had to date him. Just that you’re gonna be meeting for the first time.”

“Maybe so, but I know you’re thinking it.” He waggled his finger at him. “And let me tell you this: I’m going to go next door, ask for the ball back, and then come right back here. No bullshit, no stopping inside for coffee or whatever, no nothing . You got that?”

“Whatever you say, mate.” Wade still didn’t look entirely convinced, but he didn’t press the issue any further and left the kitchen, leaving Neville all by himself.

What a pain in the ass… Neville shook his head as he watched Wade retreat downstairs. He waited until he was gone before exiting into the hallway and walking towards the front door.

The moment that the early-August heat hit his face, Neville immediately regretting going outside. God, how have those kids been playing out here for all this time? He despised the thought of meeting his new neighbor while drenched in sweat, so he decided to stop wasting time and briskly started the trek over to the house next door.

“It won’t take him much longer, calm down!” Neville could hear the faint sound of Jen reprimanding her sister from his own yard.

“We’ve been waiting foreverrrrr…” Naturally, the next voice he heard was that of Daisy.

Five minutes. It’s been five minutes since they asked. At most.

Neville looked up at the house that was now in front of him, and he marched up to the door with authority, determined not to let Wade’s nonsense get in the way of what he came here to do. He didn’t come here to flirt or do anything of that nature -- he was not going to let the wannabe matchmaker that lived in his basement cloud his judgement.

He rang the doorbell and took a step back, crossing his arms and waiting for some sort of response. He could still hear the sounds of Daisy and Jen bickering from the yard. He debated taking out his phone and asking Wade to keep an eye on them, but it was right as he reached for his pocket that the door opened.

“Hi, I’m—” Neville stopped himself once he got a good look at the man now standing in the doorway, his mouth hanging open slightly.

“Um… How can I help you?” The man asked, brown eyes narrowed in confusion, like he couldn’t figure out why this stranger was gaping at him on his doorstep. It was those same eyes that Neville found himself suddenly lost in, momentarily forgetting just why the hell he was there in the first place. That’s a good question -- how can you help me?

Neville cleared his throat, shaking his head and snapping himself out of his trance. “Excuse me, I’m sorry to bother you, but my kids accidentally threw their ball over your fence. I was wondering if we could get it back.”

“Oh, that’s what that was?” He smiled. “I heard yelling coming from next door and was wondering what had happened.”

“Ah, well, you know how little girls can be sometimes…”

“Trust me, I do. I work with them. I can toss the ball back over for ‘em.”

“Thank you.” Neville returned his smile. “Again, sorry to trouble you. I know you’re still busy unpacking.” Neville could see the moving boxes that were sitting in the hallway. “Don’t mean to interrupt.”

“Don’t worry about it, it’s not a problem at all. Hey, what’s your name, by the way? I’m Mustafa.”

“Mustafa…” Neville repeated. It was a nice name. “I’m Adrian.”

“It’s very nice to meet you, Adrian.” There was that infectious smile again. Neville found himself quite liking how his name sounded coming from his mouth -- and he normally hated his first name. “You’re the first person around here that I’ve actually spoken to, you know that?”

“That doesn’t shock me.” He frowned. “The people around here aren’t exactly the nicest. They don’t really do things like greeting new neighbors.”

“That’s a shame… But at least I have one nice neighbor in you . That makes up for it.” Mustafa shot him a wink. “I should probably go get the ball now -- I’ll catch you later, okay?”

“Okay! I’ll, uh… see you around.”

With that, Mustafa shut the door, and Neville let out a breath that he didn’t even realize that he was holding. Finally, it was over . He had done what needed to be done, and now he could go back home and rub it in Wade’s face.

I didn’t linger at all. Neville thought with a sense of triumph as he went down to the sidewalk. Wade was so sure that I was going to fall head over heels for him within thirty seconds of knowing him. Not even close.

…Still, Neville thought it was a bit strange how he had acted when Mustafa first opened the door. Everything about their conversation was normal with the exception of the beginning. Neville had been completely entranced by him, especially those eyes … What was that all about?

Neville’s moment of contemplation didn’t last very long, as he was interrupted by the gleeful sounds of his daughters, whose ball had just been returned to them. He was overthinking things, as usual. He only felt this way because Wade planted the seeds in his mind.

This was nothing to dwell on.

#mustafa ali #neville #adrian neville #wwe fanfiction #mustafa x neville #jess.txt #i sincerely apologize if you're on mobile rn and can't see the read more because this is a Long Chapter #dad au

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echodrops · 6 years

Text

The Promises I Made (2017-2018)

For the past eleven years, I have spent every New Year’s Eve compiling a list of fifty promises I intend to keep or fulfill over the next twelve months. The results have been truly amazing, and I have kept some promises I never thought I could. This year, for New Year’s, there will be a new set of promises for to me keep, but here are the old ones, for review!

The Promises I Made (2017 edition)

1) I will get a(nother) new job. Or probably just curl up and die. Status: Kept! I got a new job and moved to Texas. 2) I will translate at least one more month’s worth of Regenkatze. Status: Broken. T_T I did a few pages, but I didn’t get far. 3) I will repot all my plants that need repotting. Finally. Status: Kept, amazingly. 4) I will buy actual freakin’ curtains that I like for my house, RAWR. Status: Broken. I bought no curtains this year. D; 5) I will continue to utilize Plant Nanny to track my water intake and keep myself from getting dehydrated. Status: Broken. I was okay at the beginning of the year, but then the usage dwindled. 6) I will complete at least one craft project that requires me to utilize a new skill, like working with a new material. Status: Broken. I didn’t do anything really crafty this year… too busy moving. 7) I will repair the mortar on the fence out front and seal the bricks on the window sills. Status: Broken—ditto the above. Moved out and wasn’t able to really keep any of these promises about my Utah house. 8) I will finish at least 26 books over the course of this year. Status: …I read a lot of fanfiction. A lot. But not too many new published books. Made it to maybe ten counting the readings I had to do for World Lit class but other than that, nothing close to 26. 9) I will trim the grape vine and call the city to see about cleaning out behind the house because the water culvert is flooding into my yard and jeopardizing my garage. Status: Actually kept! It needs to be trimmed again, but yes, I was able to trim it down and keep it from flooding. 10) I will successfully pass Horsemanship II. Status: Kept. 11) I will broaden my music tastes this year by getting into at least three new bands that I have never heard of or in genres that I don’t normally listen to. Status: Kept! I got into a few new K-pop bands and also Spellblast. 12) I will do the laundry at least once every two weeks. I swear it!! Status: Uh… Somewhat kept? At the new house in Texas I have to wear nicer clothes to work so I have to do laundry more often, but I don’t know about at least once every two weeks… 13) I will finish my new Anime Expo costume early and not wait until the last moment! Status: Broken—I didn’t cosplay at all this year. D; 14) I will remove all the rocks from in front of my house because they are hella ugly. Status: Broken; see above about moving out of Utah and no longer being able to work on the Utah house much. 15) I will go to a dentist and get Invisalign or some work done to fix my front left tooth. Status: Broken. I swapped jobs and had to wait for my benefits to restart and then by that time it wasn’t a good time to get dental work done. 16) I will have at least a once weekly “game night” with my roommates. Could be fun. Status: Broken… I think that um… we played a few times. 17) I will replace the battery in my watch, finally. Status: Kept! 18) I will pay off at least half my credit card debt. Important adult thing, yo. Status: Broken, sooooo broken. T_T It just got worse, not better. D; 19) I will learn at least 100 new words in German and document them as I go to keep them fresh in my memory. Status: Broken. I totally forgot that I even made this promise… 20) I will keep up with my new book club as long as it is possible for me to attend (I.e., if I don’t move). Status: Kept. The book club kinda fell apart pretty quick, but I kept up with it until it did. 21) I will be better about walking my dog because I have been slacking lately. Status: Broken, I’m so sorry Kinguin… It’s sooo hot in Texas. 22) I will build a new PC to replace the desktop computer that my dog destroyed. SLFSFJNDFG. Still angry. Status: Broken. Moving sapped all my money away, so I could not afford a new PC. T_T 23) I will get the scratched lenses removed from my glasses and change the prescription on the orange pair of glasses too. Status: Broken. See the above deal with the new benefits not kicking in for 90+ days.

24) Also: I will get my black glasses fixed so that they stop FALLING OFF and flying into the every nearby rock and sharp pointy object… Status: Broken. T_T

25) I will obtain at least one six-star hero in Tales of Link. Don’t look at me like that. Status: Broken—I haven’t played Tales of Link in months. @_@

26) I will design at least ten outfits and post them. (I’m still trying with this one, dammit.) Status: Broken. …I guess I should probably just give up on this one…

27) I will organize my closets, especially the hall closet which looks like a bomb went off. Status: Broken. I moved out of my Utah house which did involve cleaning out the closets, but um… the closets at the new house might be just as bad now…

28) I will actually utilize the stupid Paint Tool Sai that I paid for. At least three fully colored artworks this year. Status: Broken. I was able to draw nothingggg this year. T_T

29) I will level all my battle classes to 70 in Stormblood. Status: Surprisingly broken. I wasn’t able to play much at all after July so my time for leveling just plummeted.

30) I will reach 700 followers on tumblr. You should follow me. I’m only marginally a waste of time and space. Status: Kept! I have 861 followers right now! Thanks everyone for the follows! :D

31) I will learn to make a new (delicious) cocktail or two. Status: Broken. I drank a new delicious cocktail but I didn’t make any myself.

32) I will lose ten pounds. Status: Somewhat kept? I don’t think I made it to a full 10 pounds but I did noticeably lose some weight.

33) I will reach at least 300 species on my birding life list. Status: Kept! I’m at 306 currently, thanks to making to Texas and seeing a bunch of new birdies. 34) I will win NaNoWriMo this year. (But pretend that I didn’t, to not disrupt my blue-purple-blue-purple NaNo site pattern. XDD) Status: Broken. I didn’t even get to like 5,000 words. T_T 35) I will obtain the Astrope mount in FFXIV. Status: HA. I think I’m at like 200/1000 for mentor roulettes. Broken. 36) I will see at least one new bird species in the wild that is not native to the United States. Status: Hmmm, not sure what I was thinking about for this one, but I did not succeed.

37) I will put a storm door on the side door of my house because water is leaking in (due to lack of said screen door) and causing damage! Status: Gonna count this as somewhat kept because I did try to get a storm door installed, but they wanted to charge me $300 just to install the door and I didn’t have the money at the time. But I did fix the gap beneath the door so that it no longer leaks.

38) I will visit Nicaragua. Status: Broken. T_T I had the chance but things were so bad at work I didn’t want to blow my vacation in case I needed it… And I did end up needing it, so things worked out.

39) I will water my plants more consistently and take better care of them—to the point where the one orchid that hasn’t bloomed in years will bloom again! Status: Uh… somewhat kept? Namely, I moved and left my plants in Utah, but they’re being taken care of by others so they’re alive at least still.

40) I will write at least four new chapters of my Voltron fic. Status: Kept!

41) I will get duct work done to bring heat to the downstairs bathroom and side bedroom. Status: Broken… But we did get a bigger heater for the downstairs so at least it was warmer down there this year.

42) I will update my calendar with important dates—holidays, birthdays, etc.—and be productive about sending cards and well-wishes. Status: Uh… broken. I forgot I made this promise too.

43) I will complete my series of posts about Yato/Hiyori. Really. Status: T_______T One day. One day. Broken. 44) I will pamper myself more—spa day at least once a month! Status: Somewhat kept? Maybe like barely kept. I was good at this for the first couple months, but then it tapered off. 45) I will visit my out-of-town friends more often and make better efforts to stay in more frequent contact. Status: I think I’ll mark this as kept. I visited more people this year, anyway, including @rachelwritesstories! 46) I will make sure the lawn stays decently mowed this year instead of being embarrassingly tall and weedy. Status: Hrm… Somewhat broken/somewhat kept? I did move, but apparently the lawn has been at least somewhat consistently mowed since I’ve been gone. 47) I will do some work on my laundry room to make it look less like a dungeon. Status: Broken. The dungeon persists. 48) I will revise TVR, especially the early chapters, and move it to AO3. Status: Broken. I got like maybe 1/3 of the way through revising the first chapter. Um… maybe in time for KH3 or something? :C

49) I will get an electric tree trimmer to make trimming my trees out front much easier. Status: Kept.

50) I will keep these promises. Status: Mostly broken. T_T

Totals Kept promises: 12 Broken promises: 31 Somewhat kept/broken promises: 7

Jesus, I thought I was glad to see the back-side of 2016… 2016 had nothing on the roller coaster of a year that 2017 was. What a literal dumpster fire. While politics and the environment went haywire around me, my job situation grew untenable again (ooh, but hilarious karma—just last month they fired the shitty boss and REHIRED my old awesome boss… Except of course by then I had already, you know, quit and moved across the country to pursue a whole new career field… Well, c’est la vie!) and I ended up packing up everything and completely changing my life once again…

In just the last two years I’ve swapped career fields twice and randomly packed up and moved to Texas of all places. I experienced the drama of prepping for a hurricane and also got to see it snow in Mexico. Life’s weird.

Looking back on these promises, I honestly don’t feel too bad that so many of them were broken this year. I really had no idea what was going to happen in 2017 when I made last year’s promises, and so a lot of the goals ended up not matching up with my reality in the end. At the end of the day though, I feel like I’m in a much better place today than I was at the end of 2016.

I don’t think 2018 is going to be easy, but I do think it is going to be better, and that’s a good feeling to have. Let’s do this! The new set of promises will be up by tomorrow.

#50 promises #new year's resolutions #new year #thank god #good-fuckin-bye 2017 #you will not be missed #IRL stuff

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