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btsgotjams27 · 9 months

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things you don't know (2) | jjk

summary: the aftermath of jimin's party is weighing on your mind and you wonder if you have the courage to face jeon jungkook again.

✨ title: things you don't know (part 2) ✨ pairing: jungkook x f!reader | ✨ rating: PG-13 ✨ genre/au: angst | ex best friends!au | ✨ word count: 3.8k ✨ warnings: pov switch, we get to find out what happened to reader's panties, jimin's a menace, but overall a good friend :'), minor language, reader loves to threaten her friends (in a loving way ofc), jk & reader talk (properly), not really a warning but a mint mojito is a iced coffee drink not alcohol lol ✨ a/n: hi??? we're back with these two :') I didn't think anyone would like the first part that I wrote bc it was so angsty! lol but I'm so happy it was well received. i hope this gives everyone some closure. also, i'm scared of this flopping bc so many people asked for another part. i was so close to not writing it, but alas here it is. as always, i'd love to hear your thoughts. don't be afraid to drop any questions or comments. gonna go hide now, byeeee!

✨ mini-series masterlist ✨

~ JK POV ~

A haze of darkness loomed in the early hours of the morning. The night sky should've been clear according to the weather icons on Jungkook's phone. Could it be that his eyes are deceiving him? Were they hazy and cloudy? If he rubbed them, would the sky finally be clear? Or maybe you have blurred his vision, distorted his mind.

As if you weren’t already on his mind 24/7, 365 days for the last seven years. Your prodigal return has made him want to be close to you again, see how you were doing, and see if you had somehow found a way to forgive him. Your appearance at tonight’s party confirmed you must’ve hated him and could never find it in your heart to forgive him. At least, that’s what he thought.

On his late-night drive after dropping off Josie, he went the long way home through the city streets. He ended up at the park where you used to stargaze when you needed to clear your mind, and it was one of those nights for him.

You had taken over every fiber of his being, capturing his heart and holding him hostage. You’ve haunted him every day of his life since you left. At least when the two of you were in school, he could see you in class and the hallways, but once you left, there was no way to keep track of you, that is, until you started posting your college adventures on Instagram. He’d see your stories and how you’d come home to visit your parents and old friends, but of course, you wouldn’t see him. Why would you? He hurt you.

He replays tonight’s events—studying every word, every facial expression, your body language. He’s looking for a way to make it right, a way back into your heart. He doesn’t like it when you’re hurting, doesn’t like it when you’re mad at him, and especially doesn’t like it when you hate him.

He wished he could redo the last seven years and the moment when he decided to kiss Josie. He should've just left Jimin’s and come to yours, confessed his feelings, said how much he’d missed you, maybe even been brave enough to ask if he should go with you to college. Maybe he could’ve saved a lot of heartache for you, himself, and even Josie.

He took a deep breath, exhaling the unease lingering throughout his body. Opening his eyes, he realized the sky finally cleared out. He tucked one hand behind his head, and with the other, his finger traced constellations into the shape of animals—a little game you used to play together.

Thoughts raced through his mind: Do you still have a love for stargazing? Did you find a new spot? Did you have someone to accompany you? Or did you go by yourself? He guessed he’d never find out the answers to his questions.

“You’re coming in late. Or early. Were you with Josie?” Jimin’s sitting at the dining table, sipping on his coffee.

Jungkook shook his head. “Just out.”

“Man, it was good to see ____, right? I haven’t seen her since we graduated. Did you catch up with her?” He shifted in his seat, his foot pushing against the table’s leg, causing his chair to lean back. He licked his lips, suppressing a smile.

“Kind of.” Jungkook shrugged.

The chair made a loud thump when Jimin leaned forward. He set his coffee aside, his eyes narrowed, hands folded. “What happened between you guys, anyway? You were so close in high school, and whenever I ask you, you always change the topic.”

Jungkook looked at his friend, hoping he’d get the drift and move on from this conversation. He wasn’t keen on being bombarded with questions this early in the morning. He pulled out a chair, the legs screeching against the floor as he buried his face in his arms on the table.

“Or you quiet down whenever I bring her up. Well, whatever happened, you should just make out—I mean makeup with her since she’s back,” Jimin suggested, grinning at his mistake.

Jungkook looked up. “I don’t think she wants to see me.”

“See her anyway.”

Jungkook raised his eyebrows.

“What? You’ll either sit here and keep wondering what could’ve been, or you can talk to her like an adult and hash things out—get everything out in the open.”

“I hurt her, Jimin.”

“So? Go and apologize.”

“I don’t think she’ll accept it.”

“It’ll be up to her to decide, but at least she’ll hear it from you.” Jimin sipped his coffee again. “And don’t think I haven’t seen you lurking on her Instagram throughout these years.” He shook his head and chuckled. “Your Instagram handle is the alphabet without ‘JK’ in it—so obvious.”

Jungkook's eyes widened. He thought he was careful all these years, hardly posting anything but random food dishes he’s cooked.

Jimin let out a hearty laugh. “Oh—you thought you were slick, huh? I’m quite the detective myself, Jeon.” Jimin pushed his chair out to stand, massaging his friend’s shoulder, shaking his head at him. “It’s time, my friend. Don’t let the past continue to haunt you.”

He lightly tapped his fingers on the table, debating his next move. He knew he had to break things off with Josie once and for all. No more letting her hover, giving into her, or letting her manipulate him. He let her have too many years of him–it was finally time to cut off the head of the snake.

~ reader pov ~

The early morning sun peeked through your curtains, beaming rays of light reflecting off of your mirror, making you sneak a glimpse of the time on your phone.

7:30 AM. It’s too early for anyone to function like an average person.

Propping yourself against your pillows, you begin scrolling through Instagram. You were tagged in one of Jimin’s photos.

The caption read: Look who’s back.

You were tipsy when the photo was taken. You had let Jimin wrap his arm around you, kissing your cheek, as you made a kissy face at Lana, who snapped the picture.

You looked at the amount of likes and comments. Jimin was still popular after high school. Your finger tapped on ‘view all 90 comments’, and then you realized it was just Jimin and Josie arguing back and forth in the comments about you.

Rolling your eyes, you were ready to exit the app, but then you couldn’t help but notice the username of ‘abcdefghi_lmnopqrstuvwxyz’ in the comment section, also telling Josie to ‘stop.’ You recognized the username because they liked a few of your posts and had seen your stories but never interacted.

You never bothered to look at everyone who followed you, but this username was too creative not to have a look.

When you clicked on the username, their profile picture was a sunset; their bio only had an emoji of a cookie and photos of food dishes. You guessed this person was an aspiring chef. Everything they posted looked scrumptious.

A series of knocks on your door interrupted your train of thought. It’s so early. Who could be here at this hour?

You peered through the peephole, your hand ready to unlock it, until you saw it was none other than Lana. There was a burning feeling in your chest, and your jaw clenched as you debated whether you wanted to let her in. She claimed not to know who Jimin’s roommates were, and you so happened to come to the party where Jeon Jungkook lived? Coincidence? Yeah, right.

“I can hear you breathing on the other side of the door,” she said, moving back to show you she had brought coffee from one of your favorite places.

You unlocked the door knob but left the chain lock intact. Opening the door, you peeked through, staring at the coffee in her hand.

“Leave the coffee, and I shall let you live to see another day.”

Lana rolled her eyes. “I know what you’re thinking–I set you up, but I swear on my mother’s grave that I did not know Jimin and Jungkook were living together.”

You tilted your head and crossed your arms. “You are correct. I believe you set me up, and I won’t be forgiving you.”

Lana sighed, digging through her bag. “I have something else for you too.” She pulled out the very thing you were looking for last night–your blush-pink panties.

You reach out to grab them, but she withdraws, clutching them in her hand. “I did you a favor by swiping them, washing them, and getting your favorite coffee. You’re still not going to open the door for me?”

You huffed, closing the door and unlocking the chain. Crossing your arms, you stood in the way, unwilling to let her in.

She showed off her biggest grin, holding up the tray of coffee and your panties.

You grabbed the coffee before grabbing your panties, leaving the door open if she willingly wanted this to be her last day on earth.

Lana follows you, closing the door and plopping beside you on the couch.

“Anything else you need to get off your chest before you breathe your last breath?” you ask before sipping the mint mojito iced coffee. You forgot how much you loved this drink.

“Yeah. How did the conversation with Jungkook go?”

“I swear to god, you’re addicted to drama.”

“As long as it doesn’t involve me, then I’m all ears,” she beamed from ear to ear, sipping her coffee. “And I also want to make sure you’re okay.” She elbows you before laying her head on your shoulder.

You couldn’t be upset with Lana. You knew she just wanted you to heal from what happened with Jungkook.

Last night felt like a fever dream, bumping into Jungkook. He sprang up on you with no warning. You had no time to prepare yourself—your heart, for what you’d say.

It’s like you had traveled back to that 18-year-old girl watching her best friend repeatedly hurt her. The scene replayed in your mind like an endless film reel–Jungkook and Josie holding hands, finding a letter in your locker, tearfully reading it in your room, and realizing you didn’t have a friend anymore after that day.

“So?”

“He blames me for everything that happened.”

Lana’s eyes widened, and jaw dropped. She put down her coffee, got up, and pulled her hair back. “You better hold me down before I beat his ass.”

You dragged her back beside you. “Stop being so dramatic.”

“How was it your fault?”

“He said he was upset that I was leaving for college and didn’t care to include him in the conversation. Then he went to one of Jimin's parties and kissed Josie, and they started dating.”

Lana’s upper lip raised in annoyance, glancing up at the ceiling. “I'm gonna punch him and his little girlfriend in the face the next time I see them.”

“And apparently, he says they’re not together or whatever.”

She gasped in disbelief. “Not together? She was practically all over him! And he was letting her do it!”

“That’s what I said, but he says it's complicated.”

“What are you gonna do?”

“What am I going to do? Nothing? Absolutely nothing. Avoid them like the plague. What else am I supposed to do?”

“What if he comes looking for you?”

The thought crossed your mind, but you had nothing to say to him. What more did he want from you? Since he blamed you, it’s not like he’d come asking for forgiveness.

“I don’t know. Maybe I shouldn’t have moved back.”

“Stop. I'm so happy you’re back. This place is so fucking lame without you.” Lana curled herself into your couch, hooking her arm in yours.

“Yeah, I didn’t think I had to endure all this drama with Jungkook the week I returned.”

“Maybe you should just talk to him and clear the air once and for all,” Lana suggested.

“I don’t know if I can do that without strangling him.”

“I’ll bail you out of jail, don’t worry, or I can help you. We can be cellmates.”

You loved how at least one of your best friends would go to such lengths for you. “God–I don’t wanna be an adult. I don’t want to talk to him.”

“I know, but I bet you’ll feel a million times better if you do.”

You didn’t want to hear the truth but you knew it was what you needed to do. You and Jungkook had unfinished business. Maybe it’s better to just talk to him and close that chapter of your life and finally be able to move on.

You Jiminie 🦗

JAMAN Oh, are you sliding into my DMs?

You 🙄 In your dreams

JAMAN 😂 I’m kidding. What’s up?

You Can I ask you for a favor?

JAMAN Anything for you

You Can I get Jungkook’s number?

JAMAN Huhuhu…the plot thickens

You Oh, stop it. Will you give it to me or not?

JAMAN Idk it depends.

You On?

JAMAN If I get to see more of you

You Jiminie…

JAMAN 😞😞

You You saw me once, that’s not good enough?

JAMAN Let me take you out to dinner. I want to catch up with you.

You Then I’ll never have to see you again? 🙂

JAMAN Sure…

You Fine fine fine Give me his number

You waited a few days to call Jungkook in case Jimin told him he gave you his number. You didn’t want to seem desperate; at least, it would be at your discretion. You’d be more prepared with your heart and your mind.

You sat there, staring at his name, tapping on the screen, and before you knew it, the line began ringing. Ah, fuck.

There’s no going back now.

Hello?

“Hey, Kook. It’s ___.” You can hear him shifting through the line.

Oh, hey. Jungkook cleared his throat. What’s up?

“I wanted to see if you’d be up for coffee or something. If you’re not busy, that is.”

Like today?

You hummed.

Just tell me where and what time.

“Philz Coffee at 2?”

Yeah! I’ll see you then.

You quickly ended the call. Well, the easy part was done. Now, onto the rest.

Even for a Thursday afternoon, the street where the coffee shop was located was rather crowded. You blamed the increased remote jobs and everyone flocking to work from there instead of their homes.

Walking toward the shop, you looked up to see Jungkook sitting outside with two coffees on the table.

He gave a small wave and stood when you approached him. “Hey!” His voice was enthusiastic as he flashed a warm smile, dimple on display. Jungkook gestured for you to sit.

“Do you still like mint mojito iced coffees?”

You chuckled to yourself. You didn’t think he would still remember your coffee order. “Yeah, I do.”

“Cool, figured you still did.”

You gave a half-smile.

Jungkook leaned forward in his seat, eyes on you. “So, why did you want to meet up?”

Your lips thinned before you cleared your throat. “I guess we have some unfinished business.”

“Yeah, I guess so.”

You sighed, pulling yourself together to turn to him, looking him in the eye finally. Never in a million years did you think you would be sitting here, talking. His doe eyes sparkled, his boyish charm lingered, and that sweet smile made you swoon.

“I’m gonna say my piece, and then if you have anything to add, go for it.”

He nodded, listening intently to your following words.

Closing your eyes, you take a deep breath. “When you stopped talking to me—it hurt, fucked me up for a long time. I convinced myself for years I was over it, but that wasn’t the case at Jimin’s.”

It felt weird to finally say everything that had been building up aloud in front of him.

“It was hard going through college without you. I couldn't talk to you when I wanted, come over when I was bored, and experience new things with you. It was like this big piece of my life was missing, and no one could fill it. Sometimes, a song would come on shuffle that reminded me of you; then I'd get sad because I didn't know your new favorite songs or if you had seen the new Marvel movie.”

Most of all, you missed his presence and how he’d light up when he was excited to show you something or how he’d put a smile on your face when you were down.

“You were my best friend, Kook. I shared everything with you. So it hurt when you felt like you couldn’t talk to me. I would’ve understood if you couldn’t be friends with me because of Josie—I mean, it would’ve sucked big time, but I would never want you to feel like you can’t be honest with me.”

Jungkook stayed quiet for a bit before responding. “I’m sorry about what happened. I was hurting too, and I guess I wanted you to hurt too.”

“Well, it worked.” You let out a sad chuckle; your hand began playing nervously with the coffee cup before you.

He looks at you, scanning your face. “This might not mean anything now, but I know you. I know what songs you like, movies you watched, what made you sad and happy.”

Your gaze slowly flicked to his, your eyebrows knitted in confusion.

“I don’t want to sound like a creep or anything, but I’ve been following you on Instagram.”

“You have an Instagram account?”

“Uh, yeah. I just don’t post my face or anything.” He pulled out his phone to show you.

Your jaw dropped. “Oh my god. You’re alphabet boy?”

“Alphabet boy?” Jungkook’s forehead furrowed.

As soon as he said that, you began to piece everything together. So he was on social media. He was just good at hiding it.

“So, you’ve been keeping up with everything I’ve been doing?”

“You were my best friend. I missed you and wanted to know what your life was like.”

You didn’t know how to process this information. You had been lurking on Instagram, trying to get a glimpse of Jungkook, but after all these years, he was trying to keep a part of you with him.

“Just because you’ve liked my posts or watched my stories doesn’t mean you know me.”

He nodded in agreement. “You’re right. I don’t, but I would like to get to know you again.”

“What about Josie? What is she going to think?” You didn’t want to get in the way of whatever they had going on.

“I’ve tried breaking up with her multiple times, and she keeps on coming back, and I’m pretty dumb for letting her back in. I think we’ve just gotten into that rhythm where we’ve been comfortable with each other that it’s hard to let it go, you know?”

You chuckled to yourself. He was never really good at speaking up, was he?

He looks at you. “Do you think we can start over?”

You take a deep breath. “I don’t know. I—I don’t think I can lose you as a friend again.”

“You won’t,” he responded immediately.

You liked how sure he was of himself. That nothing or no one could get in the way of a new friendship again. But with Josie still in the picture, you didn’t think it would be as easy as he was making it seem.

A car drives by, music playing loudly from their speakers. It stopped the conversation, giving you time to think.

A part of you would love to be friends again, and the other part was ready to let go and start fresh. You weren’t the same person you were in high school. You had grown up, lived, and loved a little, and after finally getting to speak everything you’ve held onto—you were ready to close that chapter you had kept open for so long.

Jungkook waved his hand, calling out to you.

“Hmm?”

“What happens now?”

You shrugged, and your mouth twisted to the side. “I don’t know, Kook. How about we just take it one day at a time? And I don’t mean like we talk every day or something, but if we see each other, we’ll be able to say ‘hi.’”

Jungkook nodded. “Baby steps.”

“Right. Baby steps.”

“I can do that.”

JAMAN Dinner. Friday. 6 PM.

You Why, hello, Jimin.

JAMAN Right, hi. Dinner. Friday. 6 PM. Be there.

You You didn’t tell me where.

JAMAN My place.

You Is Jungkook going to be there?

JAMAN No, he’s outta town. Going somewhere with Josie.

You tut. Of course, he hasn’t broken it off with Josie. Why would he? No one changes within a week, right?

You Okay, fine. See you on Friday. Can I bring anything?

JAMAN Just yourself 😘

Friday.

JAMAN Hey, I’m running late from work. But make yourself at home! I’m going to grab some food on the way back, too.

You Am I supposed to break in?

JAMAN Oh, you silly girl. The code is 0613.

You ‘Kay, see you soon.

You couldn’t believe you agreed to come to Jimin’s place for dinner. Meeting up somewhere would’ve been safer if you bumped into Jungkook again. But you two did decide to take baby steps.

Keying in the code, you stepped in, eyes wandering around the house. Surprisingly, it was well-kept. No throw pillow or blanket is out of place. All the coasters were neatly lined up. Even the house plants were flourishing.

You closed the door, then heard a shatter of glass hitting the ground along with a ‘fuck’. You didn’t see any cars outside when you arrived. Maybe Jimin was dropped off.

“Hello? Jimin?”

You walked into the kitchen, peering around the corner, and saw someone’s head bobbing up and down.

“Kook?”

He looked up with doe eyes, and his jaw opened. “Oh—hey.”

“What are you doing here?”

Jungkook furrowed his eyebrows. “I live here,” he said slowly, sweeping the glass in a dustpan.

“Yes, I know that. But where’s Jimin?”

“Jimin’s at work. He asked me to make dinner.”

You huffed, throwing your head back. “Did you plan this?”

“Plan what?”

“This. Us. Dinner.”

“What? No. I didn’t know you were coming over.”

Your phone buzzed in your back pocket.

JAMAN Oh, hey, friend. I can’t make it to dinner. Guess you’ll just have to eat with Kook. 😘😘

You I’M GONNA BLOCK YOU PARK JIMIN

JAMAN 😘 I love you.

“I’m—just going to go. See you later, Kook,” you said, turning around to leave.

“Where are you going?”

“Home. Bye, Kook.”

“Why don’t you stay? I already made dinner and don’t want it to go to waste.”

You stopped in your tracks. Whatever he made smelled good.

He set down the dustpan and walked over to you. “Come on. It’s just dinner.”

You turned back to him, scanning him from head to toe. Why did he have to look so boyfriend in his all-black outfit and matching baseball hat?

You pointed your chin to the ground, staring at him. “Just dinner.”

✨ read part three ✨

#jungkook fanfic #jungkook fic #jungkook angst #jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #bts fanfic #bts fic #bts x reader #bts x you

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somehow-a-human · 27 days

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Whose POV is it Anyway?

The Dirty Donkey, I think I found *Clue!*

DO NOT ASK NEIL ABOUT FAN THEORY

Continuing with my analysis of the changing POV's in Good Omens 2, let's take a look at the pub scene in the Dirty Donkey and the rest of episode 2!

For reference & context, I recommend reading these posts:

Whose POV is it Anyway? - Introduction

Lens Filters

POV "Your 'Something's Wrong' Voice"

POV a Trip to Hell and a 25 Lazarii Miracle

POV a Companion to Owls

When we first see Crowley in his tactical turtleneck, it's when Shax shows up at the Bentley. He is asleep in the car and his sideburns are long. Is this because he's being observed by Shax first in this scene so it's her POV? It's difficult to distinguish if the filter could be the BDFX Crowley filter or the BPM Hell filter, but if we're using the sideburn lengths as an indicator we can look at this initial scene as an external POV.

*Fun thing I noticed here: when Shax threatens Crowley the plants in the backseat start squealing and shaking because they're afraid lol.

Next we get to see Crowley and Aziraphale go to the pub! They never go to the pub! Aziraphale strokes the thin dark dukes chest, and is saved by his snusband from the scary carpet man. The entire scene inside the pub is warm and hazy and glowy AS HELL (well not as hell, that's a different filter) It's clearly filmed with the BGG filter and likely Aziraphale's POV, which makes sense, they talk about making people fall in love, romance, Jane Austen, Cotillion Balls, it's VEERRRYYY Aziraphale. Crowley's sideburns are long throughout and when the pair get up to leave it's because Aziraphale mentions he wants to show Crowley *the Clue*!

Crowley's response to this is: "I'm lost, am I doing a rainstorm?" nothing rude about the Capital C Clue, yet.

Then the scene cuts to a shot of them walking out of the pub and we have transitioned to Crowley's POV! The lighting has changed and is saturated and cool toned, Crowley's sideburns are short, and he IMMEDIATELY roasts Aziraphale,

"Whatever you found, don't call it a Clue... well don't pronounce the capital letter!"

spicy snek.

Even if you make the argument that they could have filmed these scenes on vastly different days, the continuity for the extras dress and placement was spot on the, as you can see from these shots of before and after the cut. Notice the extra in the red jumper near the door is there in both shots with the same group of people, nobody seems to have moved, and Crowley's sideburns are the only thing that very obviously changes length between these scenes.

Crowley and Aziraphale then head back into the bookshop.

We're back to the warm hazy tones of the BGG filter and Crowley's sideburns are long again. We've switched back to Aziraphale's POV. They get a prophecy of sorts from Gabriel, and Aziraphale goes to study his Bible and think for a while.

We next see Crowley Asking Nina about Sudden Rain.

His sideburns are short again, and the BDFX filter is back evidenced by the bright cool saturated tone of the scene, so we're in Crowley's POV. Aziraphale meets him at the Bentley and says he'd like to drive the car. We can hear Crowley even smacks Aziraphale's hand away, which if this was from Aziraphale's POV I'm sure is a detail that would've gone omitted!

NEXT POV Bodysnatchers & Cosplaying a bookseller

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jklinges2003 · 9 months

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Just a Ghost of a Girl You Once Knew and Loved

A/N: Hey guys I decided to make my first short fanfiction on here. Even though I’ve made a lot of fanfics on Quotev, this is my first time writing one on tumblr, so if I mess up, don’t judge lol! Anyway, I started watching “The Summer I Turned Pretty” with my mom, including watching season 2 this summer and I swear it just leaves me intrigued, makes me laugh, makes feel like I’m actually in it and I wish I really was. And I am so team Jeremiah all the way! So, after I watched 2x06 and 2x07, in episode 6, Jeremiah and Belly almost kiss while at the end of episode 7, they finally kiss, but I can’t find the GIF from episode 6 from when they almost kiss cuz that’s what I want this short fanfic to be about and take place in. And I also might switch POVs.

codes: Y/N = Your name

Y/EC = Your eye color

SUMMARY: So, I imagined what would happen if a girl in the show (Y/N) was best friends with Belly for a long time and had a huge crush on Jeremiah at first, and even Y/N hooked up with Jeremiah in the first season but after him and Conrad’s mom Susannah died and after Y/N has been seeing signs of Jeremiah having feelings for Belly, they broke up before the events of season 2, but Y/N’s feelings for Jeremiah have never faded and as the group reunited in season 2, Y/N has been holding onto hope that something could happen with her and Jeremiah because she’s missed him so much. And even Jeremiah feels the same, but he just wouldn’t admit to her or even to himself since a part of him still has feelings for Belly. And throughout season 2, Y/N has been trying some casual attempts to get Jeremiah’s attention but failed every time. So, one night as the gang throws a party at the beach house to honor Susannah, and while Y/N was hanging out with a couple of friends, she witnesses something that just pushes her to her breaking point, increases her insecurities and her anger/jealousy towards Belly while she’s been trying to keep her friendship with her intact, and Y/N’s heartbroken behavior strikes a chord in Jeremiah and hits him with guilt.

SONG: “Part of Your World (Reprise II)” by Halle Bailey from Disney’s live-action Little Mermaid. I feel like the song matches Y/N’s situation really well, and I love Disney songs, so I wanted to choose this song.

Y/N’s POV:

The party for Susannah has been going great! It’s fun, loud, and it was a beautiful way to honor Susannah. I hoped I’d get closer with Jeremiah this time because out of all the attempts to try and get his attention while he’s been going all lovey-dovey on Belly even though they’re not even dating, I’ve failed. Jeremiah and I had something special last summer, we bonded really well, he brought out the best in me, and there’s nobody like him. He’s irreplaceable. At first I’ve always been a very shy and self-conscious girl, but after bonding with Jeremiah, his childish personality and his sweetness and fun energy is just so contagious that it just makes you wanna have fun and laugh with him. So, he brought out the fun and confidence that I never knew I had in me. And we even felt a strong connection and spark between us. Being with him always made me feel safe, he’s easy to talk to, he’s relatable, his light blue eyes just take my breath away and you can easily see the emotion in them. But, unfortunately, I regret us breaking up in the first place after Susannah died. And I could see it in his eyes that he does, too. Whenever he and I would talk, I could easily see that he feels lost and confused, like he wants to be with me again as if us breaking up was a mistake for him, too, but also another part of him wants to be with Belly since his feelings for her never faded while my feelings for Jeremiah have never faded. And every time he’d be affectionate and sweet towards Belly, my close best friend and who’s like a sister to me, I can’t help but feel nauseous as if seeing the sight of them together just makes me wanna puke, even though they’re not dating, but I respect their close friendship since they grew up together, and I have been trying to be strong and understanding and nice, but inwardly I just feel sick and it’s suffocating me, like I’m tired of bottling it up. And I have no one to talk to about it since I feel like they wouldn’t understand and that they’d think of me as just a sad pathetic ex-girlfriend who can’t get over her ex-boyfriend.

After watching Taylor and Steven’s talented dance moves for the song “Party In The U.S.A.”, I went back to hang out with Nicole and Dara. We laughed and talked for a bit until one of the girls brought up a relationship she’s in, and that immediately made me think of Jeremiah.

Since Jeremiah has always brought out the confidence in me, I have been thinking about it for a while and I have been waiting all summer to tell him my feelings and that I’ve never stopped loving him even though I was scared to since I didn’t wanna stand in the way between him and Belly. But, I realized I’ve got nothing to lose, and that it’s now or never.

I excused myself from the girls and walked into the crowd to look for Jeremiah. I looked and looked and looked. Until I saw something that just hit me in the heart. I saw Jeremiah and Belly sitting together closely, talking and looking at each other that way. I stood and watched worriedly as I glanced at Jeremiah and then Belly. The way they looked at each other was the same way me and Jeremiah looked at each other last summer when we hooked up and fell in love. I felt like I just wanted to run out of the room and throw up. Then, they stopped talking while still looking at each other with smirks, and then they both slowly leaned in, almost about to kiss until a girl yelling “Fight! Fight!” in another room interrupted them and gathered a crowd. Seeing Jeremiah and Belly almost kiss just hit me in my breaking point. I was about to tell Jeremiah how I felt and that I never stopped loving him, but after seeing what I saw…my chance was ruined. I was too late. The hope I had in me all summer was broken and turned into dust. And I felt ignored after all the tried-and-failed attempts to get Jeremiah’s attention, like as if I were a ghost of a girl he once knew and loved. Like as if what we had before was just nothing.

While the fight between Taylor’s ex-boyfriend Milo and Belly’s brother Steven was occurring in the other room, some other kids didn’t bother to watch the fight and just stayed behind, wanting to stay out of it. And also they were also either drunk or high. I’ve never been one to drink or do drugs or smoke or any of that stuff, I’ve made a vow to myself that I’d live life in a clean state of mind. But after witnessing Jeremiah and Belly together, since it hit my breaking point, I was at that stage where I didn’t wanna feel anything anymore.

I walked over to the group of kids in the kitchen, not wanting to talk to them, and instead just opened the fridge and grabbed a bottle of beer. Since my emotions were shut off, I let my impulsiveness get the best of me and I started to open the bottle and chug the alcohol drink. I didn’t care that it tasted bad, I was just tired of feeling this way. After finishing half of the bottle already and walking around the party, trying to avoid Jeremiah, I then saw him and Conrad standing outside with Belly stuck in the middle of them and the two brothers were arguing, and I could easily tell that it was about Belly.

Ever since Belly has been hooking up with Jeremiah at first and then Conrad and then having to choose between them, I felt bad for her but I also got irritated at her because every time they would be loving and sweet to her, instead of listening to her heart about who she truly wants to be with, she just kept letting it happen and kept throwing herself at them, playing both brothers. They both don’t deserve that. Especially Jeremiah since after he and I got together, Belly and Conrad got together temporarily, and then since Jeremiah’s been crushing on Belly while he was really in love with me, and he was angry at Belly for hooking up with Conrad since her and Jeremiah kissed before while he and I were together which also caused our relationship to go downhill. The love triangle between Jeremiah, Belly, and Conrad is just stupid and annoying since Belly won’t make a decision about who she truly wants to be with, and now with me in it, it has turned into a love square. And the last thing I wanted was to be involved in a love triangle, let alone a love square. And now I got dragged into it due to my feelings for Jeremiah never leaving me. Could things get any worse?!

I continued drinking the rest of the bottle of beer, trying to numb everything inside me and to just escape from the pain. I started to get a little tipsy and even though it felt wrong, it also felt good since it helped numb the pain. Then while stumbling around the party and then sitting on the floor in a corner of a room, taking a few more swigs of the beer bottle, I started to lose myself into sorrow and despair.

The bottle of beer was then almost done. I was now really drunk. I kept accidentally bumping into people while stumbling and trying to keep myself standing. But, I started to hear Nicole ask me if I was okay since she saw that I wasn’t myself. My facial expression was blank, my eyes looked like as if something inside them had died, my face was tear-stained which caused a bit of mascara to run down my face, and my hair was a little bit untidy. When she asked if I was okay, my vision was blurry, my hearing was distorted and echoey, and my head was spinning and fuzzy. I didn’t respond to Nicole and instead just accidentally lost my balance near another kid who was carrying a glass of a drink, causing that kid to accidentally drop his glass which broke when it fell. And when I fell, the palm of my hand landed on the broken glass which caused my hand to bleed a little, but I didn’t feel the pain since I was numb and drunk.

A tiny crowd of the people gathered around me and started to look at me in concern, worry, and confusion all at once, and that was the last thing I wanted. I didn’t wanna be viewed as someone who was fragile and vulnerable, even though I knew that it was okay to be vulnerable once in a while since everybody has strengths and weaknesses. But, I just didn’t care anymore.

While there was a few people gathered around me, I kept reassuring them that I was okay, but the one person who I definitely didn’t want to check on me was none other than Jeremiah himself, but he checked on me anyway.

“Y/N? Y/N, are you okay?” Jeremiah asked as he kneeled down beside me to try to help me up, but I kept brushing him off and tried to pretend that I wasn’t hurting, both emotionally and physically. Emotionally from witnessing Jeremiah and Belly almost about to kiss, and physically from losing my balance due to my drunken state and falling to the floor and the palm of my hand landing on broken glass. So I even tried to hide my drunken state from Jeremiah since I didn’t want his pity.

“It’s f-f-fine. I’m…fine, Jer.” I tried to reassure, my voice slurring a bit as I tried to help myself up and stand on my own feet without losing my balance again and without Jeremiah seeing my bleeding hand.

But, he was looking at me that way with concern and worry. I finally managed to stand on my own two feet and then walked away from the crowd, stumbling and limping.

Jeremiah’s POV:

Seeing Y/N like this had me worried. I didn’t know what was going on with her, but she seemed pretty drunk and she looked upset for some reason. She shouldn’t be alone. She could get hurt or end up doing something stupid.

I followed her as she stumbled out of the room, but I lost her in the crowd. I looked around for her until something caught my eye. I saw her outside on the patio, walking away from the beach house and just heading down to the beach, still stumbling and limping.

I walked outside to the patio and follow Y/N down to the beach with the dark night sky in the view. She didn’t look like herself. I was really worried.

“Y/N! Y/N, what are you doing?” I asked her in concern as I caught up with her. Her pupils were dilated, her hair was untidy, she could barely walk, and she even had mascara running down her face so she looked like she had been crying. But why?

“Going to the beach. What do you think I’m doing?” Y/N asked sassily, her voice slurring. She was definitely drunk. I’ve always known her to be a goody-goody girl who would never want to drink, do drugs, or smoke, but she was actually drunk. What changed?

“But, y-you’re drunk. Are you sure you’re okay? And you fell back in there. Are you hurt?” I asked as I stopped her from walking any further towards the water since she’s too intoxicated to go for a swim. When I asked if she was hurt, I looked all over her body for any cuts or bruises or anything, until I spotted her hand bleeding. I took that hand gently and looked at her worriedly. But she immediately yanked her hand away and glared at me for some reason before stumbling to walk further towards the water. I stood in front of her and put my hands on her shoulders, preventing her from doing so.

“Y/N, your hand is bleeding. We need to clean that up and put either some band-aids or gauze on there. Let’s just go back inside, okay?” I said to her calmly, but sternly and worriedly before I put an arm around her shoulders to help her walk back inside the beach house. But she immediately refused and put up a fake smile, and her fake smile looked angry.

“No! No, no, no, no. I’m fine, Jer. You don’t need to help me. Why don’t you go and help Belly instead, hm? I’m sure she’s probably going through a lot after being stuck having to choose between you and your brother. So go ahead, why don’t you go help her and be her shoulder to cry on? I can take care of myself.” Y/N said while slurring before letting out a hiccup at the end of her last sentence. She was being stubborn as hell. And this was also a side of her that I’ve never seen before. Why was she acting this way, especially towards me?

“Y/N, I’m not gonna leave you out here by yourself, especially with your drunken behavior. I’m not gonna let you do something stupid. Like, what were you planning to do out here at the beach? Why were you walking towards the water?” I asked her, trying to be calm and gentle, but I had a bad feeling about Y/N’s intentions that it built worry inside me which caused me to raise my voice a little bit.

“None of your business. What is this, 20 questions or something? Just leave me alone, Jeremiah.” Y/N spat out, still slurring before she walked past me, still stumbling. I watched her about to go into the water, but her legs were shaking as if she could barely stand. I wanted to stop her and go get her, but I wanted to see what she was planning to do first so that I can really know what’s going on. She stopped for a second as the water reached to her knees, then she kept going until it was at her waist and she started to cover her mouth with her hand and then cover her nose with her other hand before she began to dunk her head into the water.

I widened my eyes as it immediately clicked. Y/N was about to kill herself by drowning while drunk! As I finally knew what she was about to do, I immediately took action and rushed into the water, grabbing Y/N by the waist and dragging her out of the water. She started screaming protests at me to let her go, but I couldn’t let her do this. I care about her so much. And…I actually love her, even though a part of me loves Belly. I just don’t know what to do. But after seeing Y/N like this and after us reuniting along with the others, I was actually really glad to see her. She’s a sight for sore eyes. She’s beautiful, she’s kind, caring, warm, honest, sweet, sassy, headstrong, authentic, moral, the voice of reason, and a talented singer with a beautiful voice. She’s even a better singer than I am. I did like her when she was a shy and introverted girl, though, I thought she looked adorable whenever she’d blush. But after we bonded last summer and fell in love, I started to see a more confident and silly side of her and I couldn’t help but love her even more. I miss what Y/N and I had together, even though I love Belly, too, but it’s not really the same with Belly actually. Y/N’s the one I feel something strong and loving for. She’s even tried to be there for me after my mom died, but I was too blind in my own grief and in my own conflicted feelings for Belly to even see it. How could I have been so blind?

Seeing Y/N acting like this was just heartbreaking and shocking to me. I was even more worried about her, especially since she just tried to kill herself by drowning in the ocean while completely drunk.

As I dragged her back to the sand while she was screaming protests at me, I ignored the protests and looked at her in shock, anger, heartbreak, and worry all at once.

“Y/N, what the hell do you think you’re doing? Why are you trying to kill yourself?” I asked her sternly as I held back tears in my eyes since I was trying to be strong for her.

“Why did you just help me?! I told you to go be with Belly!” Y/N snapped while slurring as tears filled her eyes. Why is she bringing up Belly while I’m focusing on Y/N and her safety?

“Y/N, this isn’t about Belly, this is about you. You’re drunk, you look like you’ve been crying, you’re acting like a different person, and you tried to kill yourself! Why are you acting like this, Y/N? Did something happen? Talk to me.” I said to her sternly, but calmly as I tried to keep myself together.

“No, if you wanna go be with Belly, be with her! She’s all yours! I won’t stand in the way! So, just leave me alone!” Y/N snapped as a tear rolls down her cheek, her voice still slurring. Why is she talking about Belly like this? She’s Y/N’s best friend and they’ve always been like sisters. This wasn’t the Y/N I knew and loved.

“Y/N, what are you talking about? What do you mean you won’t stand in the way and that Belly’s all mine? Where’s all this coming from?” I asked her in concern, hoping to get her to talk. But, she immediately exploded the truth about the cause of her problem while slurring.

“I SAW! I saw everything! I saw you and Belly almost kiss back in there before the fight between Milo and Steven broke out!” Y/N shouted through her slurs and through her tears. She even had her eyes either looking down or her eyes closed as if she could barely look at me.

When she admitted that to me, I started to remember when me and Belly talked back in the house during the party, and we talked about the flings I had from last summer and through the whole year after me and Y/N broke up and when Belly got together with Conrad. Then I remembered telling Belly that she’s a better kisser than out of all the girls and guys I’ve kissed, including Y/N. I can’t believe I actually said that because Y/N was a good kisser, too. She really was. And I even remembered during this whole summer when me and her and the rest of the gang were hanging out and Y/N tried some attempts to get my attention since she must’ve had hope for us and I didn’t even realize it. I’ve been ignoring Y/N all summer and I didn’t realize it till now. How could I have been so stupid?!

I felt such a pang of guilt and regret for how I’ve been treating Y/N. I’ve treated her as if she weren’t around and as if she were second and I’ve been putting Belly first. I realized Belly’s not the only one stuck in the middle of a love triangle and between me and my brother, I was even stuck between two girls who matter so much to me. With Belly, it was real and I really loved her, at first it was like a brother and sister relationship, but…ever since I saw her last summer, I was done for. She took my heart with her. But then, at that time, Belly brought Y/N to Cousins for the first time and introduced her as her best friend, and Y/N just took my breath away. I know that I started to feel something for Belly, but when I met Y/N, I knew there was something special about her that was just so magnetic to me. I wanted to know her. And what we had was real and strong, too. And I realized now that it was stronger than what me and Belly had because even if Belly liked me back a bit, it was always gonna be Conrad for her, even if she wouldn’t admit it. It finally hit me.

Y/N’s the one for me.

I looked at her with guilt, regret, and sympathy as I realized what I put her through and what she had to witness tonight. I put a hand on her arm, trying to be as comforting as possible.

“I’m really sorry, Y/N. I-I-I didn’t realize that you…” I was just at a loss for words as I still kept trying to process this.

“That I what?! Huh? That my feelings for you still haven’t faded and that I never stopped loving you?! I’ve tried to get your attention all summer and tried to get you to realize that I’m still here, but you just kept pining for Belly and acting all affectionate to her while you ignored me and acted as if I wasn’t the room, like as if what we had together has been forgotten! And you and her aren’t even dating, yet you act like you are, even though you two are best friends, but why can’t you just admit it to yourself that…that you still love me, too? I’ve seen it in your eyes, they can easily tell what you’re feeling. And when you were around me this summer, I had hope for us! But you just won’t open your eyes and realize what’s right in front of you! I was about to tell you how I felt, and yet I catch you and Belly about to kiss! I just…I just couldn’t bear the sight of that, so I’m actually glad the fight between Milo and Steven broke out and interrupted you and Belly. I know that’s rude to say, but I just can’t pretend that I’m okay anymore! All this time ever since everything that’s happened, I haven’t been okay! And neither have you, and I’ve tried to be there for you and reconnect with you at least, but…you didn’t want anything to do with me and the only person you’d talk to was Belly! I’ve gone through enough hell. And so has Belly, so I’m just gonna go…have a little ‘chat’ with her.” Y/N explained everything to me through her tears and her drunken slurs about the hell she’s been going through ever since me and her broke up and ever since my mom died.

And as she said everything, it was all true and I didn’t even realize it all till now. And what she said struck a chord in me. I’ve been leaving her all alone and I shouldn’t have done that. Well, not anymore. I’m not gonna leave her alone anymore, no matter how much she stubbornly tells me off. I’m gonna make up for my mistakes. Then, as Y/N says the last part, she stumbles as she stands up on her feet, holding her fingers up like quotes. I knew she wasn’t just gonna have chat with Belly, she was gonna confront her. I couldn’t have her do that. Her friendship with Belly has always been so important to her so I couldn’t let her be the one to destroy it by having a confrontation and argument with Belly.

“Y/N, no. Just…Just come back to the house, I’ll let you stay with me, okay?” I offered kindly as I tried to help her and not let her be by herself in her drunken state and in her painful heartbreak.

“No! I don’t need saving, Jer. I’m not some piece of glass who’ll end up breaking. I’m fine. Just let me go.” Y/N protested as she tried to walk away from me and walk back to the house. I wanted to stay with her, but I had to respect her decision if she could handle it. I watched in concern from behind as Y/N kept stumbling up the small wooden board steps that would lead up to the patio of the beach house, her legs started to shake again as if she could barely stand and walk.

She then took another step until she tripped and fell down to her knees, making me immediately rush up to her side and try to help her up and help her walk.

“Y/N, let me help you.” I offered while trying to help her stand, but she pushed me away and kept protesting.

“No! Just leave me alone, Jer! If you don’t walk away right now, I’m gonna have to beat the shit out of you!” Y/N threatened drunkenly while she was holding back tears again and trying to stand up on her own.

“Oh, yeah? Let me see you try. I’m not gonna leave you, no matter how many times you push me away. I’ve pushed you away already, I’m not doing it this time.” I responded with sternness and determination in my voice.

As I challenged her to see her try if she can fight me off and push me away, I knew she didn’t have the guts to do it since I knew she still had love in her heart for me. She sat on her knees while I was kneeling next to her, and she turned around and tried slapping my chest and shoving me away, but her pushes weren’t strong enough. She kept trying and trying through her frustrated grunts as if I were her punching bag, but I didn’t let it affect me. She needed to take it out on anything or anyone. And since she was mad at me, I already took responsibility for how I treated her, so I felt like I deserved to be slapped and pushed since I was actually such an asshole.

Then after a few failed shoves and slight slaps from her, she started to get frustrated and feel defeated since I wasn’t going anywhere. Her shoves and slaps started to weaken and she immediately began to finally let out her tears even more. She broke down sobbing as her attempts to push me away and slap me were weakening and slowing down, and she started to lean her head and body against me while sobbing in defeat, frustration, and heartbreak. I wrapped my arms around her securely and protectively, holding her close to me and never wanting to let go of her.

“Shhh…it’s okay, it’s okay, Y/N. You’re okay, you’re okay, I’m here. I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere, okay? Shh…” I whispered softly while holding her tightly but gently, trying to comfort her. She still kept crying in my arms, one of my hands rubbing her back and my other hand caressing the back of her head and her hair. I held back tears as the sound of her cries just broke my heart.

“Y-You left me, Jer…! Why are you still here? Why aren’t you leaving me now? You…You love Belly…!” Y/N said through her drunken sobs as if she was expecting me to just walk away from her after I’ve been ignoring her all summer that she was used to being walked away and abandoned. My heart was just absolutely breaking for her even more. She didn’t deserve this at all. How could I do this to her?

“Because…Because I…I-I-I still—” I was about to respond to her that it was because I still loved her, but before I could finish, I felt her body go limp and she was breathing normally and peacefully, her eyes were closed while her face was tear-stained, and she still had mascara running down her face. She was passed out drunk in my arms.

I sighed guiltily and shamefully, and yet in relief that she was finally out cold so that she wouldn’t do anything stupid while drunk. Then, I put a hand under her legs while I put another hand under her back, lifting her up and carrying her bridal style.

I walked back in the beach house while carrying a passed out asleep Y/N through the party in the house, hoping everyone wouldn’t gossip or be concerned about it since I was already taking care of it. And also some of the kids were drunk anyway, so I’m sure some of the other kids didn’t care.

Then, I carried Y/N to my empty bedroom which only had my sleeping bag since me and Conrad’s bitchy aunt Julia removed everything from the house since she was selling it. And I hated that the beach house was being sold. It held too much memories of me and Conrad’s mom. But now that all the furniture is gone, it’s like memories of our mom are gone, too.

I gently laid Y/N on another sleeping bag that I had laying next to mine and I tucked her in, making sure she was comfortable. Then, I stood up and looked at her sleeping figure. She looked so peaceful and beautiful, despite that she was a drunken mess tonight and despite the mascara running down her face, she still looked beautiful to me. Then, I started to hear a girl crying coming from the bedroom next to mine. I leaned against the wall and heard Belly drunkenly crying in her bedroom. She was trying to call her mom, Laurel, for help since she had nowhere else to turn to about the situation with her having to choose between me and Conrad which is causing tension between me and my brother and also she told Laurel about trying to get the house back while everything she’s trying to do to help just keeps going wrong and she needed help. Her cries even broke my heart. A part of me wanted to go in there and hold her. I couldn’t bear to have my best friend upset like this. But, after what Y/N has been through not just tonight but throughout the whole year?

I thought about it for a moment again and I looked over at a sleeping Y/N, and I told myself again that I’m never gonna abandon her again. I’ve been focusing on Belly and putting her first all summer that I’ve been ignoring Y/N, so it’s time to make up for my mistakes and put Y/N first this time.

I slowly walked over to her and laid down in my sleeping bag right next to the sleeping bag that Y/N is sleeping in. I stared at her sleeping face again and after what happened tonight, I can’t get it out of my head. I could’ve lost Y/N tonight and it was my fault. As I looked at her with remorse, guilt, care, and sympathy, it felt as if a magnet was pulling me. I sat up and leaned forward and down, planting a gentle loving kiss on Y/N’s cheek before laying back down, getting ready to go to sleep.

Y/N’s POV:

As I was passed out asleep from being drunk tonight, I had no idea where I was at the moment. But, I opened my eyes very slightly in which my vision was very blurry and the room was dark since it was nighttime and my hearing was ringing and echoey as the party was going on downstairs. All I could see was someone’s sleeping face in front of mine, but I couldn’t tell who it was. Instead, my eyes just closed again as my eyelids just felt too heavy to be open and my head was pounding.

The next morning, I started to feel like crap. I opened my eyes slightly as the ringing in my ears started and then finally faded away. My head was pounding, I felt a bit nauseous, makeup was running down my face, and my hair was untidy. I looked around the room and wondered how I got here. I also noticed a gauze wrapped around one of my hands. I couldn’t even remember a thing about what happened last night. I could only remember that I was dancing and hanging out with a couple of girlfriends, and then I was crying for some reason, and that I took a walk on the beach. But the rest was all just a blur.

As I slowly sat up, I immediately heard a familiar voice next to me.

“Morning, Y/N.” Jeremiah said to me sleepily but with a concerned and sympathetic look on his face. I looked over at him and seeing him lay there next to me startled me and left me in surprise. What was he doing here laying next to me while he ignored me all summer? What the hell happened?

I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion as my head was still pounding a bit.

“Jeremiah? Wh-What are you doing here? What am I doing in…in your empty bedroom? What happened last night?” I asked nervously and in confusion, my voice slightly slurring since I was hungover, and I needed answers.

“You don’t remember?” Jeremiah asked in concern as he sat up, sitting next to me. I tried to think hard and see if I could remember anything about what happened last night, but I couldn’t remember. I looked over at him and shook my head.

Then, the moment was interrupted when me and Jeremiah heard Belly and her mom Laurel arguing in the room next door, their voices muffled until we heard Belly’s bedroom door open and close. Jeremiah helped me stand up to my feet before we both walked over to the door and opened it, only to see a crying Belly walking past us and past Conrad in the hallway. She looked behind her and glanced at us before continuing to walk away and walk downstairs. I wondered why she was upset. But whatever it was, I was concerned and felt bad for her.

Then Conrad looked over at us and glanced at me before looking at his brother as if he were encouraging him or something. Jeremiah nodded softly at him before taking my hand, closing the door behind us as we’re still in his empty bedroom. He sat us on the sleeping bags as I looked at him in confusion and in concern. He looked like he wanted to tell me something.

“Y/N…are you sure you don’t remember anything about last night?” Jeremiah asked me in concern in which I shook my head slightly before responding.

“All I remember is dancing and laughing while hanging out with a couple of girlfriends and then…I was crying for some reason, and then I took a walk on the beach. And the rest is all just a blur. And now for some reason I ended up here. What happened, Jer?” I explained all I could remember before asking him in concern about what else happened last night.

He took a deep breath while trying to find the right words to explain to me about what else happened last night. He looked as if he didn’t wanna bring up what happened last night since it would bring back the pain and heartbreak.

“Well, um…you, uh…you were pretty drunk. And…you were at the beach to go in the water to…to commit suicide, but I stopped you and asked you what was wrong, and you…admitted that you, um…saw me and Belly…almost kiss. And…you also explained to me the hell you’ve been going through ever since our breakup a few months ago and ever since my mom’s death. And…also that I’ve been ignoring you all the summer since I’ve been focusing a lot on Belly and I was too blind to see that…that you were still in my life and…” Jeremiah explained everything to me before he trailed off and paused as he could barely finish the sentence. His eyes were tearing up as he felt huge remorse and guilt for what he put me through and he wasn’t sure if he could ever forgive himself.

“God, I’m so sorry, Y/N. I’m so, so, very sorry about how I’ve treated you like as if you weren’t in the room. I’m so sorry I ignored you and didn’t put you first and didn’t realize what you were going through. That’s a mistake I won’t make again. I feel like I don’t deserve your forgiveness, but…I realized that…that I also never stopped loving you.” Jeremiah apologized sincerely as a tear rolled down his cheek. As he explained everything, I started to remember a little bit even though it was still a blur. I felt embarrassed that I vented to him about how I’ve been feeling the night before and I didn’t wanna drag him into my problems. But when he said that he also never stopped loving me, I widened my eyes and looked at him in surprise.

“I…Oh my God, I feel so embarrassed for my behavior. I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I dragged you into my problems. But…But what about Belly? You love her, don’t you?” I asked, unsure if he was just playing me if a part of him is gonna feel something for Belly and I didn’t want him to choose between me and her. But I was unaware that he already made a decision.

“Yeah, about that, I thought I felt something for her since…last summer when I saw her new glow up and when she first brought you to Cousins for the first time…I thought I was done for. Like, I really felt something for her, but…when I met you and bonded with you and also she’s always gonna love Conrad, even if she won’t admit it to herself…I realized I was lying to myself. I thought I liked her, but…Belly’s not like you, Y/N. You’re irreplaceable. And I’m so sorry that I didn’t see that sooner. Ending things between us was a mistake. I miss what you and I had just as much as you do. And…I don’t know if you can ever forgive me, but I—” Jeremiah said honestly to me as he took my hand. But, I was actually proud of him for finally making his decision. And I just hoped that Belly would soon decide who she truly wants, too, and I hoped it would be Conrad she’d choose because they were actually good together, even though they were opposites.

So, as Jeremiah kept talking, I immediately cut off him off by quickly leaning in and kissing him on the lips, taking him by surprise until he kissed me back. Our kiss was passionate, loving, and tender. His lips just felt so soft and smooth and he was a very good kisser. Then, we pulled away as we gazed in each other’s eyes, his bright blue eyes staring into my Y/EC.

“So…does…does that mean you…forgive me?” Jeremiah asked while he was still in shock from me making the first move and kissing him.

“Of course I forgive you, you lovable doofus.” I responded while smirking and tousling Jeremiah’s golden curls, messing his hair up and making him laugh.

“Hey!” Jeremiah whined playfully through his laughter before flipping his short golden curly hair, making it still look the same as it did before. I giggled before he smirked and tickled me on my waist as revenge from when I untidied his hair.

I squealed and laughed and squirmed around as he tickled me. Then I waved my hands up in surrender.

“Okay, okay! I give! I surrender!” I protested through my laughter before Jeremiah stopped tickling me and smirked. Then he leaned down as I was laying down on my back on the sleeping bag and we giggled again before we shared another tender, loving kiss.

I felt my heart beating out of my chest. I was so ecstatic and relieved that I was actually back together with Jeremiah! I felt as if the darkness inside me has been taken away and then the light has risen inside me again.

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odessastone · 2 months

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NEW LIFEWEAVER AND SYMMETRA LORE BITS FROM "REBUILDING RUINS"

So I got my copy of Heroes Ascendant today and THERE WERE SO MANY GOOD LITTLE MOMENTS IN THIS STORY I MUST gush I MUST

So here are some new bits of Symmetra and Lifeweaver lore that we got! I bolded my personal favorite ones. 😚

(spoilers!)

Satya and Niran "grew up together" as friends, so they were friends in childhood too, not just at a teen or university age.

Apparently when Satya would get overstimulated and need recovery time, Niran would keep people away from their room and tell them she was sick so she didn't have to face anyone 😭

He also used to hang out and watch her practice her dancing for hours on end, without ever getting tired of it.

Satya considered (possibly still considers) Niran her closest friend.

Niran is late to everything (CALLED this one). He's even late for their meeting LOL

"He looked good. Satya almost wished he didn't." Bits like this are going to feed my Symweaver ass for YEARS

Satya is (still) extremely hurt by Niran leaving all those years ago, and perceives it as him having left her, not just Vishkar. She still misses him dearly, even though they've been apart for eleven years.

Speaking of which, being apart for eleven years means Niran was twenty when he left the Academy. For all you fellow fic authors out there 😊

Satya's autism is stated, full-out, no dancing around it or talking about being on "the spectrum". They flat out say "her autism" in a sentence. Cool!

One of Niran's first questions upon reconnecting with Satya is if Vishkar is mistreating her, if she needs help. Of course she denies this, but...

Niran can read Satya's emotions without her saying them, and even while thinking she's hiding them 😭 Several times throughout the story she's surprised because he cuts right through her stoic bullshit and gets right to how she feels about something.

The Architech Academy was really overwhelming for Satya, and it sounds like they made no effort to accommodate her needs. Unsurprising, considering they didn't accommodate Niran's, either.

Vishkar fiercely discouraged her from stimming, instilling in her a fear of looking "immature, or distracted, or rude, or strange".

She gave a speech at graduation, then had to spend a full week in bed afterward to recover from all the stress. And there was no Niran to guard her by then ☹

Even now, she finds many things about Vishkar overstimulating and uncomfortable, such as her uniform's fabric, and her living quarters.

Satya called Niran "Bua" way back when, possibly the first person to use the nickname for him. Partway through the story the narration (from Satya's POV) actually switches to calling him that, which is cute.

The Arcology seems to have uh, basically no real protection against attacks... Null Sector just shows up on a train and starts blasting lol. This is something I address in my fic The Light You Deserve, so it was kinda funny to see that I was right in predicting that.

She feels comfortable enough around Niran by the end to stim around him without realizing it (apparently she taps her fingers together and twirls her hands in circles, I guess kind of like flapping). She immediately stops and is embarrassed when he points it out, but Niran encourages her instead. She then uncertainly stims in front of him, growing more relaxed and confident as she lets herself do so (this had to be my favorite part of the story).

Toward the end they double down on Satya's belief that she can change Vishkar from the inside (girl....) but then at the VERY end, Niran suggests she look more into the founder of Vishkar and his ideals, and then says that "The Arcology will be delighted to have you". SHE MIGHT DEFECT TO THE ARCOLOGY IN CANON AND BE WITH NIRAN HHHHH AAAA sorry this was supposed to be an unbiased list I'm cool I'm cool

AAAAAA I'M NOT COOL I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

THIS WAS EVERYTHING I COULD HAVE WANTED IN A STORY BETWEEN THEM okay minus the random Null Sector attack tbh that was weird

Anyway the very last line says that Satya now has "whenever she needed it, a friend to return to". So they're definitely gonna interact more going forward!!

#overwatch #lifeweaver #niran pruksamanee #symmetra #satya vaswani #overwatch heroes ascendant #overwatch spoilers

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sanzu-sanzu-sanzu · 10 months

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sae

i think that more than sae’s switching from striker to midfielder what’s sadder for me upon knowing the bit that we now know of the itoshi backstory (note: through rin’s pov) is the whole fact that sae had to go through it all while being in an entirely different country. at 13 years old. completely by himself. apart from having to face this huge wake-up call regarding his skill level with regards to the world’s, he also had to deal with the crushingly different environment, language, culture, and people. no way that those did not affect his getting the results that he wanted.

this got me thinking that, even though (i’m guessing) the more widely accepted reading right now is that sae’s got his ego crushed, i also feel there’s another possible explanation for sae’s extreme bitterness regarding japanese football. (yes, it’s extreme, he doesn’t even wanna be associated with it!) japan propped him as their ‘striker’ because in a way he was the closest thing they had to a striker. and then he gets to play in a world-class setting and realizes that japan was not developing his true talent at all, which could mean two things:

1) the football he grew up playing prioritized teamwork more than the individual (and this is exactly what ego jinpachi is railing against when he started blue lock) and so this mentality hampered his striker motivations/his ego.

2) sae realizes that they were blowing smoke up his ass because they wanted him to be that striker, when they actually didn’t know what a striker was or was supposed to be; and hence he’d lost some precious time training, instead, for the role that fit his skill-set better: being a midfielder.

because sae’s the kinda guy who sets unforgiving standards—even and especially to himself—in pursuing his goals, standards that even made him recognize the brutal realism that he isn’t fit for best striker in the world, hence his laser focus on being best midfielder instead. he’s not gonna waste his perfect passes on strikers that are unable to score, he’s not gonna waste his energy on a team that won’t be able to keep up with him, and he’s not about to waste his time and his future in a country, in a football, that’ll waste his potential. if someone like him finds out that his time was wasted that way, of course he’s gonna be furious and unforgiving. (not that it’s too late now, but he could’ve started earlier, you know what i mean..)

it’s no wonder the ideals and philosophy of blue lock appealed to him then (whereas the current japanese football federation could eat shit as far as he’s concerned lol) especially with their focus on the assertion of one’s ‘ego.’ the insistence that your football shouldn’t have to depend on a teammate/your team/someone else to be great, because you yourself should have that power, the confidence/ego, and the skill to back it up. sae, anri, and ego are probably all in the agreement that these are the vital things that could help a japanese football player in the world stage.

i always thought it fascinating how there seem to be some parts in the story wherein ego (or even anri) would be explaining something, a blue lock principle or whatever, as if he were speaking to or referring to sae, even without sae being mentioned or shown in the page. blue lock is for players like sae (and oliver aiku, and many others that came before) as much as it is for the younger, much more ‘unpolished gems’ like rin, isagi, barou, etc.

i also think that while the sentiment (throughout blue lock maybe) seems to be that the striker is the best position of all and that everything else: meh, and that sae is somewhat of a tragic character for ‘settling’ on being a midfielder, i hardly think it’s tragic. it’s fair to think so (because plot) but it’s really not so bad, considering there’s many midfielder stars out there in the world, too. nowhere in the story did it also say that sae couldn’t compare to the strikers of the world; he only said that the world is filled with amazing players, and that he wants to become the top midfielder in the world not because he lost to strikers...i mean, seeing him play, his scoring ability is very much still top notch even for a midfielder. he simply has very high standards, so if he’s at his best in his passing, he wouldn’t be expecting any less from a scorer.

the striker being the like ‘main character’ in the team (according to blue lock) is not a bad thing, though—i mean they are the principal scorers so they kind of are in a way lol—because for the purposes of ‘reseting’ their current football landscape and mentality, that’s kind of important. i guess blue lock is like, we’re all about building the no. 1 striker because it’s what japan needs at the moment, but it goes without saying that the other positions are just as important, too.

#anri 🕷#sae 🕷#itoshi sae #sae itoshi #sae #itoshi #blue lock #bllk #blue lock sae #sae blue lock #bllk sae #sae bllk #itoshi sae blue lock #blue lock itoshi sae #ego jinpachi #anri teieri #ego

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m4g3114n1c · 3 months

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Desperate Measures

hi michael afton x reader fem! smut idk bro

i wrote this in my notes so i didnt read it over LMAO crossposted on ao3 im m11kyw4y!!

tags (ripped straight out of ao3): Shameless Smut, Porn with Feelings, Porn With Plot, just a little bit, Creampie, Begging, Submissive Michael Afton, Backshots, Hand Jobs, Switch Reader, Switch Michael Afton, Vaginal Fingering, Closet Sex, Penis In Vagina Sex, Co-workers, Semi-Public Sex, lol i want him so bad, Mutual Pining, poc friendly, no blue eyes white paper skin shit here yall idgaf, POV Second Person, No Y/N mentioned

word count: 3 339 !!

"my dad passed away 14 yrs ago...this her day🙏🙏" "WHO WANT BACKSH💔TS????" #michaelcore somebody get the reference pls

Sometimes desperation is a positive thing. Going to desperate measures for pleasure is a positive thing. Getting fired would be the exact opposite of said desperate measure. Michael couldn’t help himself, and when you found him like that, you couldn’t help yourself.

Michael ducked his head down slightly at the doorframe, leading you. His much more taller frame had completely enveloped you and the cramped space of the closet. The once warm closet had become unbearably hot and damp.

Every step, every hitch of breath and every shuffle of clothes against another was heard within the four walls of it. His head lowered to be the same level as you was all he needed, the moment that door shut was when he couldn’t get his mind off you, or his hands either.

His hand was cupped on your cheek, the other wrapped around the nape of your neck to be able to tug you in closer into the kiss. His somewhat chapped lips melded against your soft ones just at the right angle was just what he and you needed at work today.

His tongue had already begun exploring since near the beginning of the kiss. The taste of the tart bubblegum he had once chewed dissipated along with the chill of your gum when your mouths met.

You tugged on the collar of his already crinkled purple button up, the feeling of his muffled groan reverberating throughout your body. Michael pulled away with a soft smack, his hand never leaving your cheek. He breathed deeply, inhaling the faint scent of your perfume you had sprayed all over.

Michael was enamoured with the way your button up had been buttoned down enough by him to reveal your collarbones. His hooded irises of sapphire flitted nervously all over your face, taking in how beautiful you looked under the dim light of a weak bulb.

You had leaned in only a couple of inches to be met with his neck. Pressing a light kiss onto his Adam’s apple, you had began to pepper kisses onto his neck, then up his jawline. Michael repressed a soft whine, which in turn had caused him to sigh instead.

The whine he had tried his best to hide still came through with his sigh; it still sounded as desperate. Michael knew you were enjoying having this much control over him but you also knew he was impatient as hell when it came to a quickie. But then, being at work meant a whole other thing of quickies; being careful.

Michael’s eyes squeezed shut tightly at the feeling of you already pressing hard against him with your hand. His jaw tightened at the sudden intrusion of pleasure. You palmed at his growing erection through the pain and pleasure of the friction of his jeans.

It felt completely different having himself do this than you doing it. He pushed his hips against your hand, wanting any kind of movement right now. With that knowledge, you pushed on, pressing your lips to his already kiss bruised lips once again to distract him from how sloppy you were unbuckling his belt.

It wasn’t enough to distract him, because once he noticed, his large hands had nudged yours away, quickly unbuckling his own belt but still keeping it looped through his jeans with the desperation of wanting this to go faster.

He kept his lips tightly pressed onto yours, now unbuttoning his pants and unzipping them fully. The anticipation was killing him, he had to do this quickly. As fast as he undo his pants, you were as quick when your hand snaked its way down below into his boxers.

Michael let out a quiet moan at the immediate contact with your warm hand. You fisted him out of the confines of his boxers, just to remind him how slutty he looked right now. The tip shone wetly, pre cum already collecting.

He was more long than he was girthy, although it seemed perfect enough for you think about how much he’s going to be able to reach when he’s deep in you. Your eyes couldn’t help but keep at his cock, it being so close to you, it was quite impossible to.

You subtly licked your lips at the sight, but even that didn’t go unnoticed by him.

Quickly, you smeared it on your palm to lubricate it, then had started from the base of his cock to his tip. Your actions repeated, much antagonizingly slow than he would’ve liked. Michael’s arm came over his mouth to try and mute the absolute filthy sounds that was coming out of his mouth.

Every now and then you’d graze the sensitive head with your thumb to collect the pre-cum continuing to leak out. He was so turned on right now; it was embarrassing in a way. It didn’t help how loud the slick noises were coming from your hand and his cock.

With how good it felt for him, the buildup was only beginning slow as the familiar dim feeling in his abdomen. It was perfectly timed with the way you finally began to speed up your hand, he removed his arm, a strangled moan ripping its way out of his throat to present to you what he wanted.

“Faster,” He sighed, his eyelashes fluttering when he had closed his eyes for a quick second. His voice sounded completely different from what you heard on a daily basis at work, this wasn’t the same chill and professional person you were working with. His voice had sounded so whiny, you swore it sounded pornographic.

The look he had given you after almost made you want to ride him right away, no hesitation; you decided to fight away the voices in your head telling you to. “Please,” He whispered for good measure and with the way he was looking at you, he meant it.

“Okay,” You said drily, even though you had held back the urge to fuck him. Michael’s breaths grew shorter, feeling your strokes pace quicken almost aggressively. Leaning in more, your lips grazed against the shell of his ear.

“Is this okay?” You whispered, voice sensual enough for Michael’s mouth to begin rambling. And by rambling, it was horny rambling. “Yes, please, god, I need it, fuck—it feels so good,” He gasped out.

His abdomen twitched and you swore if he was about to cum right now, he was goddamn crazy. So you pulled your hand off him. “No, fuck, please don’t—“ His chest heaved, a plethora of curses leaving his mouth after he just let out another pornographic whine.

“Please don’t do that,”

Michael’s cold hand grabbed your wrist that had pulled off him, with a grip tighter than a vise he had tugged you closer, so close you could feel his warm breath fan out your face. You were so close you could see his damp eyelashes and the tears brimming his waterline. “I’m—please. I need it.” He said, emphasizing his please. You smiled at how needy he was.

“I’m sorry Michael,” You lean in to quickly peck him on the lips.

As you began again, his hips experimentally pushed up into your fist while you moved. He saw that you didn’t seem to mind so he did again. Then again. He continued to buck up into your own hand, head tossed back while he breathed out repeatedly what seemed to be your name and something else that was incomprehensible but sounded needy enough. His brain felt fogged with pleasure that it felt wrong to think of anything else. He couldn’t think of anything else anyway.

“You look like a loser, wow.” You mumbled, feeling his cock twitch in your hand at how rude you sounded. He swallowed, hesitant at first. “You wont be saying when I have you against the wall,” He managed to say. It sounded like a challenge that you’ve been waiting for.

The thoughts in your head were screaming now, with the added ache in your core that could only be sated by one person. Michael was crazily good at being both a whiny bitch and a freak.

“Do it then,”

And like that, the tables were turned with you completely having him wrapped around your finger as he took this as permission to do whatever he wanted. You let go off his cock, feeling his hand sliding up your inner thigh.

He kept his eyes on you to make sure he wasn’t doing anything wrong. He kept his face as expressionless, all while immediately going to press his thumb onto your clothed clit to make you squirm.

It had your desperate hole squeezing around nothing as you waited for him to actually begin. With how long you two were taking, it surprised you with how nobody was noticing you two were gone. Although being on break, this was taking longer than you expected.

Michael couldn’t wait either. He needed it, just as much as you needed him.

He wasn’t ashamed to admit that he had wanted this ever since you stepped into his life as his co-worker. You thought the same.

Unexpectedly, he brought his two fingers up to your mouth, eyes glaring. “Open,” He commanded firmly to which you listened to, opening your mouth wide enough for him to slip his fingers in.

You closed your lips on him, sucking and evenly coating his fingers with just the right amount of saliva. Humming, your eyes glanced up at Michael who felt himself grow even more turned on before if that was even possible. He withdrew his fingers with a pop, watching the trail of saliva that sloppily ran down your chin, your throat then into the crevice in between your breasts.

Michael’s eyes were devastating, they never failed to hungrily take you in, break you down to your very fiber. It was addicting to be so dependant on how he looked at you.

His hand again lowered down to your soaked underwear, pushing aside the lacy fabric to reveal your fluttering core. With how Michael stared ahead into your eyes, he knew just how wet you were already.

Slowly, he slipped the first finger in with ease even though he could’ve just began with two. His hands were big, but his lengthy fingers were huge. Although it was something, it wasn’t enough to please you immediately. With your cunt dampening his palm, he scoffed under his breath. “You’re just asking me for it without even talking,” His eyes wildly scanned your face, expression now amused as the second finger entered you. With how huge his fingers were, two fingers were enough. He idly pumped his fingers in slowly, enjoying listening to the noises of your cunt squelching and squeezing desperately around his fingers as if asking for more. He knew you were.

“Shit,” You choked a moan out, his fingers curling to press his fingertips against your g-spot.

Michael then pulled his fingers back out, quickly cleaning them off, tasting you. “Respond when I talk to you,” He firmly said before attaching his lips to yours again. You reciprocated the kiss, moaning when you had tried to part to breathe only for Michael to pull you back into it immediately again. There was nothing else coming in between just how Michael’s kisses were fervent; your mind clouding with lust and only pleasure.

He finally pulled away, leading you to the far end of the small closet where it wasn’t near the door. The next words that came out of his mouth were what set the dim flame inside you ablaze. It was as if his words were gasoline. Michael’s voice had a low rasp in them that you’d only heard once in your life before when he was impatient.

“Turn around,”

Playing with your bottom lip, this was what you were finally asking for. What you needed.

With no hesitation, you were turned around to face the wall, feeling his hand on your hip; the warmth of his hand seeped through the fabric of your skirt onto your bare skin.

“Hands on the wall,”

The cold air nipped at your bare thighs as you bent over, feeling Michael’s eyes already on them. He hooked his fingers on both sides of your panties, pulling them down and you helped get them fully off. He pocketed them for now.

Anticipation grew when he had scrunched up your skirt, displaying your bare cunt to him.

He stepped an inch closer, levelling himself to be at a perfect height with you. As he swayed a bit, the tip of his cock grazed your entrance, a gasp emitted out of you.

“Condom?” He nervously asked, as he doesn’t really keep some on him while at work. It’d be a disaster and also embarrassing if he dropped it or something. Although for you, you had come always prepared just in case but not in condoms.

“On the pill, it’s fine,” You breathed out, glad you were because you would be able to feel him raw inside you. Unanimous moans and whines escaped both of you when Michael finally decided to ease his way in, although he didn’t need to with his wet you were already. It felt so much more better feeling your plush walls hugging around him. And with this, you swore you could feel every single vein he had and how he twitched.

He cursed under his breath, inching his way more in to finally bottom out inside you. He deliciously stretched you out just perfectly, but he had waited a few seconds just in case you still needed to adjust. Your breaths filed the entire room. “You okay?” He asked, voice soft.

“Yeah, you can move,” You reassured. Michael pulled out fully, before plunging himself into you. A curse was drawn out of you, clinging to the wall for any sense of sanity for what you were currently doing. At work.

You seemed to keep forgetting that.

His tip just kissed your cervix every single time he moved. His quick strokes were enough to leave you winded. He had then created his own pace, which was absolutely ruthless.

The rhythmic sound of skin against skin filled the broom closet, and his belt buckle clinking. The smell of sex had also began to quickly make you lost in your cloud of a proper mindset. There was nothing else you could possibly think about but him.

The way his cock was curved just the right way made it for him to slam himself into your g-spot as he wanted. Tears dampened your mascara covered lashes, messing up your makeup real bad.

You tried your best to not drool with how much you were making noises. Even Michael seemed to be lost in this, his eyes unfocused as his body spoke for himself.

“Fuck, yes,” He mumbled, swallowing. “God, you have no idea what you fucking do to me,” He leaned in close to your ear, feeling how hard you were clenching around him. But that only made him quicken his pace. Michael spoke like his life depended on it, and you loved how talkative he was.

The familiar buildup you knew began, the string slowly becoming taut in your stomach. Michael’s hand sneaked around to massage circles into your sensitive nub which sped up the process. His other hand stayed on your hip, pushing you more against the wall. “Michael, yes,” You gasped out. “Please—fuck, deeper,”

Your legs were ready to collapse with how hard he was going. The tip of his cock grinded deeply into your g-spot, whilst rubbing his thumb against your engorged clit. The string wound itself tighter, the feeling of release finally just at your fingertips. “Michael, I’m going to cum—yes,” You groaned under your breath, feeling him move much more faster than last time in your favour.

“Shit—you’re tight,” He gripped your hip with his free hand. It felt like he was going to bruise them with how hard he was depending on them.

“I’m not going to last, please,” He swallowed hard, breaths short as he stared at the ceiling for a second.

There he went again. It felt like he was blurring the lines in between himself being the one in control and you being in control. “Please make me cum, please,“ His speed gradually increased, losing control of his own body due to the desire to release all of his pent up sexual frustration onto you. His begging only made you grow closer to cumming.

“Fuck, ‘m gonna cum,” You rambled, up until you felt the band pulled taut enough to break. The quick flash of pleasure and the release washed over you. A moan was ripped out your throat, ricocheting off the wall in front of you back to Michael.

Michael knew you had already cum with how much your cunt had unevenly fluttered around his still hard cock. Overstimulated, was what you felt when he had continued. But you knew he wasn’t going to last longer with how much his hips stuttered against you.

He rasped your name out, throat raw from making so much noise. You swore both of you didn’t even care about other people hearing you at this point.

“After this, you’re mine, right?” His mind managed to coherently say. He had to know if this was going to be more than just a mistake between two colleagues.

He liked you. A lot. Probably a lot more than you thought, but he did. He wanted to be more than just your co-worker friend.

“Please,”

“Yes,”

This wasn’t the lust talking, this was you. The colleague he works with. And the person who has a crush on him. You were the person whose heart stopped every single time he interacted or even looked in your direction.

“Yes, I’m yours,”

I’m yours.

His.

You were his. That was what was running, echoing, throughout his mind. He was relieved with that answer.

God, he was obsessed with you.

And you didn’t even know it. You thought it was one sided, until now.

“Fuck, yeah?”

With one last thrust, he buried himself as deep as he could into you, ribbons of hot cum spilling inside you. As fast as he came, he didn’t want to make it uncomfortable by staying like this so he pulled out. His eyes couldn’t leave the way your cunt had begin to ooze out his cum.

And then he realized that was going to make a mess, so he looked around in the closet, finding a tissue box. He began to clean up both of your mess, to which you gladly appreciated. Michael’s hands decided to let go of your hips, and you almost stumbled straight to the ground. He quickly caught you though, with a laugh. His usual awkward laugh that you associated with Michael.

“Shit, sorry,” He mumbled, quickly becoming sheepish once again. “Nah, it’s okay,” You held onto his shoulder, watching how flushed his freckled face was still. He flashed a smile, helping you up properly before realizing that you possibly couldn’t go anywhere without something underneath your skirt. He fished your underwear out of his pocket, giving it to you.

You laughed shortly before putting it back on again.

This was way too fun that you both immediately came to your senses at how long you’ve been away. People must’ve been wondering.

Michael cracked open the door, looking around to see nobody in this hallway. Thankfully.

You both sighed out of relief that nobody had known what you two were doing. It would be suspicious to get out of the closet at the same time though, so you knew it was time to part. “I’ll see you around, Michael,” You leaned up to kiss him on the lips quickly before sneaking out of the closet.

“Yeah, I’ll see you,” He whispered, seeing as though you were already far enough to not hear him.

“You should be glad I guarded the goddamn closet,” A familiar voice butted into his train of thought.

Jeremy.

“Wait, what?”

#fnaf #five nights at freddy's #michael afton #smut #michael afton x reader #michael afton x you

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toomanystoriessolittletime · 1 year

Text

Counting Stars

Summary: Mel gets used to the life in Jackson. And her two new roommates.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Melanie Summer

Wordcount: 2.4k

Rating: T

Warnings: Soulmate AU, Angst, Pregnancy, talk about forced pregnancies, talk about childbirth, mention of child death, mentions of human experiments, character death, slowish burn, a ✨moment✨, changing POV's

A/N: I started writing this chapter four times and this is the version I hate the least lol

follow @toomanystoriessolittletime-fics to get notified for updates

Counting Stars Masterlist

✨two✨

Mel was living in a house. With a porch. And a small garden.

She had a fully stocked kitchen.

Her own bed.

A bathroom with warm water.

And she had two roommates.

It had been two weeks since she had been cleared to stay in Jackson after arriving with Joel and the girl whose name she had learned was Ellie.

When she arrived in Jackson with them she had been given the choice to stay with someone she hadn’t met before until new houses would be finished, or live with Joel and Ellie.

Before she could have answered Joel had asked her quietly to stay with them. She didn’t question it, deep down thankful he had offered, not wanting to stay with someone she had never met before.

Jackson was like entering the twilight zone after so many years of running and surviving.

If she did not know that outside of these high and strictly guarded walls cordyceps had taken over the world, she would almost believe nothing changed. The first night she spent switching the light on and off until she fell asleep. Exhausted from the previous days, maybe years.

Sleep felt different now that no one was there to watch her.

It did not stop the nightmares though. She woke up drenched in sweat in the middle of the night, with the knowing feeling like somebody was watching her.

But no one was there.

The Fireflies had kept her like a prisoner and Mel couldn’t even remember how it was to make her own choices. Yesterday she had eaten almost a whole bowl of potato salad that had been in the fridge, one of the many welcome presents the townspeople had gifted to their newest residents, like a cavewoman just because she could.

She felt rather sick for the rest of the day but the point was, she could (and would) do whatever she wanted, and she did not really know how to handle it.

And then there was Joel.

Even though they lived together, they did not see each other much. He had been taken advantage of pretty quickly, going on patrol and when he wasn’t there, he was helping around town to build houses or fix things.

She had learned that he was a carpenter before.

Ellie had told her so. Ellie, who has spent most of her time with Mel since they got here.

The girl clearly was going through something, zoning off through conversations and being in her thoughts throughout the day when she wasn’t talking a hundred miles per hour. She also was struggling with her relationship with Joel.

He had lied to her when Ellie asked about what exactly had happened in the hospital. Even though he was completely right doing it, saving Ellie before the Fireflies got the chance to kill her.

Marlene really had done quite the job on the girl. In her talks to Ellie Mel noticed that she genuinely believed the Fireflies could have found a cure because of her immunity. And she was angry Joel took that from her for whatever reason.

If Mel could talk to Ellie and explain what the Fireflies really had been up to… But she hadn’t even talked to Joel about it. And she didn’t know if she would ever be ready to talk about it.

Mel only had to take one look at Joel to know that it was because he loved the girl.

So, living with these two was quite… intense. And most of the time quiet once they were in the same room.

And Mel could not handle quiet. Because her own thoughts would get too loud.

So she kept busy.

Cleaning the house, even though her back was killing her. Attempting to cook dinner (mostly with average success), always keeping a plate for Joel in the fridge because he mostly wasn’t home by dinner time.

She read books.

She took a bubble bath in the middle of the day with home made soap Joel brought home one day just because she could.

Today she had a doctor’s appointment to check on her and her baby. She’d even get a sonogram picture to take home to pin at the fridge, like her mother did with the paintings she made for her before….

“Ellie?” Mel called upstairs to where the girls room was at the moment. She wanted to move to the garage but hadn’t asked Joel yet. Not because she wanted his blessing, but because she needed his help to build the place but was simply too proud (or stubborn) to ask.

Ellie also was weirdly fascinated by Mel’s pregnancy.

It was quite adorable actually.

Tommy, who she met as Joel’s brother on the day they arrived, had brought over some books the day after, intended for Mel to read. Yet Ellie had been the one to read all of the book in a matter of days, making for some weird conversations when Mel and her were making cookie dough and she wanted to taste some of it.

Ellie literally knocked it out of her hands before asking her if she didn’t know she wasn’t supposed to eat anything that contained raw egg.

Mel didn’t.

Ellie’s protectiveness about Mel’s unborn child was why she asked the girl if she wanted to come with her to the first real doctor's appointment with her.

She wasn’t interested until Mel told her that they might be able to see the baby.

Ellie almost fell down the stairs, stopping just in front of Mel.

“Ready?” Mel asked. Ellie nodded.

It was like Joel knew she was there when he turned his head and found Mel and Ellie walking down the road towards the center of Jackson.

He hadn’t talked much to Mel since they got here.

He hadn’t talked much at all since they got here.

There were so many things on his mind, the easier way for him was to keep busy and bottle all of his feelings inside and try to make sense of it.

Like he had been for twenty years.

“You’re starring,” Joel’s hand whipped around, finding his brother grinning at him.

Joel only grunted before he focused back on his task, pointedly ignoring his little brother.

“You talked to her yet?” he asked.

“Who?” Joel asked, still not looking at him as he grabbed his hammer.

“Your soulmate,” Tommy hummed and Joel narrowed his eyes before he looked up.

“What? You think I did not see the scar on her temple?” he asked.

“Could be any scar,” Joel pointed out.

“Sure. What about your Butterfly Tattoo on her shoulder?” Tommy asked.

“When did you see that?” Joel asked suspiciously while Tommy’s grin only got wider.

Joel had seen it earlier this week, his chest tightening at the sight for a number of reasons.

Yes, he had seen some of his scars on her body, his eyes seemingly finding another one whenever he saw Mel. But the Tattoo…

When Sarah had turned eleven her wish was for Joel to get a Tattoo.

And because there was nothing in this world Joel wouldn’t do to make his girl happy, he let her paint a butterfly which he took to a local Tattoo Artist and got it tattooed on his left shoulder, much to his daughters delight.

He had been inside the house when he saw it on Mel’s shoulder as she sat on a blanket, directing Ellie in the garden on how to take care of the wild vegetables growing there.

It was like the air had been sucked out of his lungs as he saw this tattoo on her skin.

Because up to this moment he lived in heavenly denial about the scars that seemed to match his.

But the tattoo?

He could not deny this. But he didn’t know what to do about it, because he was bad at feelings (that he totally was not having). And he was even worse at talking.

He felt a hand on his shoulder before Tommy sat down next to him.

“Are you gonna tell her?” he asked.

Joel sighed.

“She has more important things to take care of soon,” he shook his head. Which was the truth. And then there was this part of himself that didn’t want to allow the idea of someone new in his life. Because the people he loved either leave or die and he already cared too much about Mel to lose her either way.

“You deserve to be happy,” his brother said. Joel turned his head to look at his brother. The brother who disappeared for years because of the way Joel chose for them to stay alive when the world ended.

“Do I?” Joel asked, before he got up and left.

“This is so weird,” Ellie had not stopped looking at the sonogram picture since leaving the doctor’s office. She had gotten her very own copy of the picture of the baby girl growing in Mel’s belly. Mel had some reservations about going to see a doctor with the way she had been treated the last years. Her anxiety was on the highest level, yet she chose to work through it instead of hiding away.

Because she needed to know the baby was okay. That one good thing would come out of the hell she went through these last years.

Ellie seemed to pick up on her mood, hesitantly offering her hand. Once Mel took it, she didn’t let go of it until they were through with the doctor's visit.

“Even more weird when she moves,” Mel put a hand on her belly.

“You feel that?” Ellie looked at her with wide eyes which almost made Mel laugh.

“All the time,” she fondly rubbed her belly.

They walked back towards the house after picking up some groceries, intending to try themselves at cooking again. Mel was bad at it, and Ellie had never done it before, so they made quite the team.

Mel was pleasantly surprised to find Joel sitting on the porch, guitar in his lap.

It was the first time he was home earlier.

She watched Ellie shrink a little, her smile disappearing. Mel didn’t know what their relationship was before Salt Lake City, but she’d bet that it wasn’t that… difficult.

“Promised I would teach you,” Joel said with the hint of a smile as he looked at her.

“Uh. Yeah. That… That’d be great,” Ellie mumbled.

“You play?” Mel asked, walking up towards the house.

He nodded.

“Been a long time though.”

“You taking requests?” she asked with a small smile. He huffed a laugh.

“Maybe later,” he said.

Mel’s eyes lingered on the scar on his temple, her own scar tingling.

“Well, I’ll leave you to it then. Gonna try to cook some dinner,” Mel smiled, looking from Joel to Ellie.

“You sure?” Ellie asked.

“Very. I might yell for help though cause I have no idea what I’m doing,” she opened the door, letting Ellie carry the groceries they had gotten inside, before she followed her.

“Mel?” Joel asked behind her. She turned around, looking at him as he got up.

“Yeah?” she asked.

“Thank you,” he said. Mel frowned.

“For what?”

“Looking after her. Things have been… Tense and you could have just… left or I don’t know but… Fuck I’m just…”

“It’s okay. I’m glad to look after her.”

“Good. That’s… yeah. That’s good.”

Mel was smiling softly at him and Joel seemed to lose every word he had ever learned before.

“Between us, I think she misses you.”

“She hates me,” he said and Mel shook her head.

“She’s hurt because she knows you lied to her. And I more than understand why you did, now that I got to know her more. I don’t think she would have understood why you did what you did if you explained right away back in the woods.”

She took a step closer, and Joel stopped breathing for a second.

“Try talking to her,” she put her hand on his arm and he closed his eyes for a moment before he sighed.

“I will,” he promised.

“And spend more time with her. She wants to ask you to redo the garage to live in there, but she doesn’t know how,” she whispered the last part, hearing Ellie come back outside.

She gave Joel a meaningful look to which he nodded.

“I put the picture on the fridge,” Ellie informed Mel to which she snorted.

“Of course you did,” Mel said.

“What picture?” Joel asked.

“We went to the doctor today and he got this cool machine where we could look inside of Mel? Like at her baby? It was so fucking awesome. And also weird,” Ellie sat on the bench outside, grabbing the Guitar.

“You got a sonogram?” Joel asked. Mel nodded.

“You wanna see?” she asked softly. After a moment he nodded.

He watched her reach into the tote bag she had been carrying, his eyes lingering on her tongue between her plush lips as she searched for it.

She got a book out, opening it to reveal a black and white picture that had been sitting in between the pages, probably to keep it safe.

“She’s a perfectly healthy baby girl,” she smiled as she held the picture out for him to look at.

He remembered the feeling of seeing the first sonogram of his daughter like it was yesterday. He had been so fucking scared when he learned that his ex girlfriend had been pregnant. But seeing his baby girl for the first time?

He felt a finger on his cheek and he blinked his eyes a couple of times to get back to the here and now, finding Mel brushing tears from his cheek, he hadn’t been aware of.

“I can not wait to meet her,” he managed to say quietly.

Mel wanted to ask a million questions at the way he reacted to seeing the sonogram picture. But this wasn’t the right time. Maybe she would get some time to talk to him some time.

“Me neither,” she cupped his cheek.

“I’m gonna head in and try to cook,” she said.

“Call for us if you need help,” he said as he let her hand fall from his face, immediately missing his warmth.

“Oh I will,” she winked, giggling as she turned away from him and walked into their house.

#my fic #counting stars fic #Joel miller x ofc #Pedro pascal #Joel miller #fanfic #fanfiction #fan fiction #tlou fanfiction

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kammii · 1 year

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Onyankopon x black fem!reader

Contains: heavy language, praise kink, breeding kink?

Written in 3rd pov

ONYANKOPON || his eyes watched y/n’s body bounce up and down, Her boobs were slapping against her skin as she gnawed down on her bottom lip, letting her whimpers slip out the cracks of her lips as she felt pon’s thick dick slide in and out of her. Onyankopons large hands were on each of her sides, taking in her thick flesh that jiggled every time she would go down.

“That’s it baby keep going” hot tears spilled from out her eyes falling onto his bare chest. Y/n’s manicured hands slithered its way up from his stomach to his toned chest. She pressed down against it and slams down hard on his erect dick letting out a loud moan. Onyankopon lets out a grunt, knitting his eyebrows. Y/n couldn’t help but moan as she felt his brown tip brush up against her mushy walls, almost making it to her cervix.

“Fuck baby” onyankopon mumbles, his brown eyes traveling down y/n’s sweaty body and landing on her fat pussy that was taking in his fat dick. He rubs his lips together feeling his cheeks heat up. “Oh fuck-” y/n’s eyes rolls to the back of her head as she feels his dick hitting the right spot.

she screw her eyes shut and slows down her movement clenching hard around pon’s large dick before she looks down at him. The moonlight shinned through the cracks of the brown colored curtains landing on his face. This man was handsome. “Baby i cant do it anymore” whines fell from out of y/n’s lips as she felt her legs giving out. Due to their previous rounds they’ve done in the living room, on the couch.

“Uht uhtn you better not stop” onyankopon voiced, taking notice of her slowing down. His fingerstips piercing into her delicate skin, onyankopon starts bucking his hips up. His skin colliding with her wet, sticky skin y/n had let out a cry feeling the tip of his dick hit her cervix making her body jolt.

“Ah-! Baby” y/n’s nails clawed down deep into his skin as she hisses at the little pain. Onyankopon listened to her cries as he continued to bring her down on his dick, gripping her soft skin for better control before looking up at her contorted face, letting out a low groan.

“Fuck pon im fina cum” y/n hummed as she closed her eyes. The second Onyankopon snapped his hips up into her, y/ns back arched forward, having her whole body spams, she moans aloud cumming hard. “Thats my baby” Onyankopon smiles, continuing to fuck up into her. He watches as her cream spills out of her pussy and covers his dick. “Baby…m’tired” y/ns head was full of clouds from the sudden orgasm.

“I know i know im almost finished” pon wrapped his arms around her waist and picked her up switching positions. She was now laying on her back and onyankopon was widening her legs. He placed her feet ontop of his shoulder and kissed her ankle “you got this baby i just wanna fill you up okay.” Onyankopon starts to move his hips again, working inside y/ns sore walls.

He knew by the morning he was gonna get a ear full but he couldn’t help but love the way how she felt. So warm, so mushy he loved being inside y/n. His balls slapped against her ass as she tightened around him. Nothing but whimpers left her mouth as she scrunched up the satin bed sheets feeling the overstimulation. “Shit baby” pon grunted, he was getting close to his climax, he could feel the pleasure flourishing throughout his body as his stomach tightens.

His dick twitches as he lets out a loud “shit!” Hes cumming so hard that hes painting the insides of her walls white. Onyankopon does a few more thrusts before feeling the last bit of his cum spewing out of his dick. His chest heaves up and down before he slid out of her, his thick white cum spilling out of her sore cunt “you did so good for me mama, now lets get you cleaned up. He says.

A/n: this my first post on here just a lil drabble lol i hope you like it.

#attack on titan #onyankopon #x black reader #x black fem reader #aot x black reader #aot anime #aot imagines #black reader #anime x black!reader #black fanfic writer #black fanfiction #x reader #character x reader #drabble #drabbles #lil drabble

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itstorimf · 1 year

Text

risky, risky, risky - professor!dad!chan x female reader

chapter three: "ENG 333"

word count: 3.2K

warnings: foul language, sexual activities (not smut, but she talks about their hookup), age gap (the ages kinda don't make sense, but look past it. i'm begging you lol), let me know if i missed anything else

a/n: i really wanna start getting to all of the good stuff, so there's a two month time gap that happens half way through the chapter. that's y/n's summer break and let's just assume that nothing crazy happens and she doesn't see chris again, yes? also, there's a pov switch that happens in here too, just so you're prepared. you get to hear from both of the lovers today lol

series masterlist

*written in Y/N's POV*

My eyes fluttered open and I was all sorts of disoriented. I woke up to the feeling of the sun on my face and my head pounding. The night before was a blur, but I was still sober enough to remember that I went home with Chris. Our legs were tangled underneath the blanket and my head was on his chest. I looked over at the sleeping man. His hair was a mess and his chest rose and fell peacefully as he slept. As attracted to him as I was, I knew that last night was temporary and I wanted to save myself from the embarrassment of having him watch me leave. I gently released myself from his grasp and put my clothes back on. They were scattered throughout the apartment, but once I had found everything, I wrote a note on the back of a receipt I found in my purse.

"Thank you for last night, Mr. Bang"

I left the apartment quietly and called an Uber outside. The Uber arrived fairly quickly and took me back to mine and Wonyoung's shared apartment. The driver would look at me through the window, clearly knowing that this was my sad attempt at a "walk of shame". I finally arrived back home, thanked the poor driver, and entered the complex. When I opened the door, Wonnie was sitting at our dinner table, sipping on a cup of coffee she had made and was scrolling through her phone.

"Ma'am you have some explaining to do! A. I am super glad you're home and alive and that that guy wasn't some weird serial killing murderer! B. Who was that?! And please tell me everything!" she yelled.

"Won. It is really really early and my head is pounding and I really want to shower." I complained. I was obviously still in the dress that I wore last night. My hair was greasy and I could only imagine how terrible I smelled. "Wait," I paused, "Why aren't you at the cafe right now?"

"Long story. Go shower and I'll explain." she said and I listened. I grabbed a clean towel and the comfiest sweats I owned and made my way to the bathroom. When I discarded my clothes, I got a good look at my body in the mirror. There were marks along my neck, hickies that were left by Chris, that scattered their way to my shoulders. I was insanely embarrassed, but when I touched them softly, I was reminded of the previous evening. The way he would mutter, 'mine' in between the kisses he would leave on my neck, or the way he would grip my hips as he fucked into me slowly, or the fact that he wouldn't finish until I had already came twice. Then I remembered that these were indeed huge bruises sprinkled all over my body and I would have to wait for them to fade. No wonder the Uber driver was looking at me with so much concern. I stepped into the shower and let the hot water soothe me. I let myself take an unusually long shower this time, seeing as I felt like I needed and deserved it.

When I finished with my shower, I threw on the sweats, brushed out my hair and rejoined Wonnie. This time she was on the couch, a blanket wrapped around her legs, watching a show she had been raving about.

"So why aren't you at work right now?" I asked as she paused the show. I remembered that the reason I tried to leave before meeting Chris was because I was worried that Wonyoung would've been too hungover to work today.

"Okay! So you know Heeseung from Chill right?" she started. I nodded knowing exactly where this was going. Chill was the coffee place that she worked at. I would occasionally pick up shifts there if they needed help, but I wasn't a regular barista. Heeseung worked with Wonyoung at Chill. I could already smell a coworkers to lovers trope coming on. "Basically, while you and whoever-that-was were getting handsy with each other on the dance floor, Heeseung and I started making small talk and he's actually really funny," she giggled.

"This is all really cute, but that still doesn't explain how you-" I said and she cut me off.

"Shhh! I'm getting there! Anyway, at some point I looked at the time, and I realized that I had forgotten about my shift this morning, so I started panicking. Heeseung said he would cover it for me if I agreed to meet him afterward for dinner," she said the last part giddily and covered her face with one of our couch pillows.

"Wonnie!!" I whined in response, "You're going on a date tonight?".

"I guess I am," she replied, "But enough about me! I need every excruciating detail about last night!".

"There's not really much to say, but I guess I'll start at the club."

*written in Chris' POV*

I opened my eyes and found myself in Jisung's bedroom, alone. I dragged myself out of bed and into their medicine cabinet where I knew they kept some pain killers. My head was pounding and I felt like utter shit. I walked into the living room to retrieve my scattered clothes on the ground and put them on. I looked over at the coffee table and there was note written there.

"Thank you for last night, Mr. Bang"

I smiled at the note and remembered my evening with Y/N. It was definitely a night to be remembered for a while. She was so carefree and full of light. The way her body molded to mine as we had sex, the way she smelled, the sounds she would make. It was all so desirable, and yet there was no phone number left. No trace of her anywhere. It was clear that the previous night was a one night stand and I would only be lucky enough to run into her again.

My phone began to ring from the bedroom and I hurriedly walked over to pick it up. It was Changbin. Then, I remembered that they were watching my son and they were probably panicking. I picked up the phone.

"Chris! Oh thank God you're awake!" I heard Ji yell from the other side of the phone. I could hear Leo crying.

"Hey guys! I'm so sorry. I'm on my way home now," I began.

"No need to apologize! Mission accomplished?" Changbin asked.

"Yes Changbin. The mission was accomplished. I'll be home soon!" I said.

"Great! Cause we've been trying to feed Leo for the last 30 minutes and he will not eat anything! He's getting really angry please hurry!" Changbin yelled in a panic.

"He's very picky. There's some frozen waffles in the freezer. Pop them in the toaster, he loves them. There's also some apple sauce packets in the fridge. He really likes those too," I gave them advice so that Leo could be fed before I got there. I grabbed my wallet from the side table and called an Uber back to my own apartment. When I got home, Leo was sitting in his highchair, enjoying the breakfast I recommended to the boys. They had made themselves some breakfast as well. "Hey guys," I announced as I walked over to the table, "Do you guys mind watching him for like 20 more minutes? I just need to shower really quick."

"For sure! Leo's almost done though and I'm scared," Jisung responded jokingly. I nodded and made my way to the shower. I washed up quickly, throwing on a pair of shorts and black t-shirt. I had no intentions of going out today, so I threw on a black baseball cap and headed back to the kitchen area. Leo was no longer eating, just playing with his food. I took him out of his highchair.

"Were you a good boy for Uncle Jisung and Uncle Changbin?" I asked my toddler.

"Yes daddy!" he responded with a smile. I giggled and put him in the bath. I got him all clean and looked at the time. It was around 11:30am which is when he usually took his afternoon nap. He was already probably exhausted from the breakfast tantrum so I put him to sleep. Once he was down for his nap, I rejoined my friends who were still sitting in the living room.

"So lover boy, how was your night?" Changbin was the first to break the silence. I was usually pretty private with my dating life, even if they were my best mates. It just felt kind of odd to disclose something that intimate, but considering that it happened in their apartment, they probably needed to know what went down.

"It was honestly... really really good," I responded with a smile.

"Good! So you gonna take her out?" Jisung asked.

"I.. uh.. actually didn't get her phone number," I responded, scratching the back of my neck anxiously.

"What?!" they both yelled in shock. "Dude, you looked like you were about ready to run away together last night! What happened?" Changbin continued.

"Well, we obviously went back to your apartment. Thanks by the way," I thanked and Ji nodded, "Everything went great last night. She was great. She went home. I went home. That's it."

"But you guys had sex right?" Jisung asked. I nodded sheepishly. "Great! Who's room?" He asked with a serious face. I didn't say anything except I looked over at Jisung.

"Ugh dammit!" "HAHAHA!" I heard them both say. "How did I lose $100 and had someone else fuck in my bed?" Jisung yelled loudly. I hushed them both trying to stifle my own giggles, afraid that our boisterous laughter would wake up my son. This had been the second bet I had caught them making about my sex life, and honestly, it was kinda comical. "Listen, I'm very glad you finally fucking got laid, but I'm burning those sheets as soon as I get home," he said in a hushed tone, still laughing. They eventually left, and I joined Leo in my room for a quick nap.

TIME JUMP TO THE START OF Y/N'S SENIOR YEAR OF UNIVERSITY

*written in Y/N's POV*

The start of my last year in college had finally come and I couldn't have been more excited. Over the summer, my confidence definitely grew and I think it was all thanks to the night that Wonnie took me to Venom. I was now officially working Chill, thanks to Wonyoung literally begging me.

This was it. All of the hard work I had put into the last four years of schooling was almost worth it. I looked at my schedule once more and saw that Mondays and Wednesdays consisted of a ENG 328, which was literary journalism, and ENG 335, freelance writing. ENG 328 was taught by a professor named Mr. Kim. He was a fairly easy-going professor who was constantly cracking jokes with us and often spoke in a sarcastic tone. My freelance writing class was taught by Mr. Yang. Similar to Mr. Kim, he was also pretty laid back. They were both fairly young to be college professors, but it made them more relatable. Both classes consisted of going over the syllabus and their own personal standards in class on the first day, typical first week of the semester behavior. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, I only had one class, ENG 333, which was designed to help me build by creative writing portfolio. This class, I was looking forward to. Wonyoung and I both needed this class to complete all of the credits we needed to graduate, so we decided to take the class together.

I found the classroom, which happened to be on the second floor of the campus, and walked into the room out of breath. I hated walking up those damn stairs. When I got to the classroom, there were only a few more seats left, but I spotted Wonyoung sitting in the second row somewhere in the middle. She put her backpack in the seat next to her to save it for me. I walked over to the desk and sat down.

"Y/N! Oh thank God you're here," she greeted me as I took my seat.

"Sorry. I got lost," I giggled back at her. "Where's the professor?"

"Late I assume-" she responded. Just then, a man walked in with sunglasses on and a book bag slung over his shoulder. With the sunglasses on, he seemed so familiar, but I couldn't pin point exactly why I felt that way. I looked down to take my notebook out to write down everything he would tell us about the semester. I felt Wonyoung tap on my shoulder, but I ignored her. "Y/N.. you're about to fucking shit yourself," Wonnie whispered over to me. When I looked up, the man had taken off his coat and sunglasses leaving him in a white turtleneck and dark brown slacks. I immediately understood why he felt so familiar and why Wonnie thought I was going to shit myself.

"My apologies to you all for being late. My name is Mr. Bang and I am your creative writing portfolio professor," he announced to the class while his eyes scanned the room. We made eye contact for a brief second and I could see the panic in his eyes. I was absolutely frozen in my seat and I had to look down at my notebook to keep myself from panicking as well. "Ehem," he cleared his throat and continued, "In this class, we will be preparing you for-" and by that point I had drowned out everything he was saying. I heard some snickers from other students about his name, not in a 'haha his last name is Bang' kinda way, but in a 'Mr. Bang is hot as fuck and I wish he'd bang me' kinda way. I felt the air get cold as I heard what they were saying. "Before I begin, I will be taking attendance, so when I say your name, please say, 'here.'"

One by one he called the names of all of the students in the class and finally it was my turn, "Y/N Y/LN?" he looked directly at me without having to scan the room. I was the only Y/N in the class, so he really didn't have to guess that hard. We made eye contact, again, and I announced that I was present. He didn't smile. No gesture that he even recognized me, but by the look of initial shock when our eyes first met, I knew that he did. "Great!" Chris said breaking eye contact with me and continued on with the rest of the class. He told us that our first one-on-one portfolio evaluations would be in two weeks and that the first day to schedule an appointment to meet with him individually would begin after class. Immediately I started to think of excuses as to why I couldn't meet with him. I thought that maybe switching classes altogether would've been easier than enduring a whole semester with this visceral tension.

When our class was over, Wonyoung and I started packing our things as other students rushed over to Chris' desk to sign up for individual sessions. Some of the other individuals in class were a little too attracted to our professor, purposefully batting their lashes when he talked to them, or giggling a little too loudly around him. It wasn't jealousy I was feeling, but more annoyance. The last semester of my senior year was supposed to be perfect. Once I was done packing and most of the students had cleared out of the room, I walked over to the sign-up sheet sitting on his desk. I looked at all of the times available and it only seemed to be the very last slots of the day that were free. 'Perfect,' I thought to myself, 'How cliche!". I signed up for the slot for this Friday night. I felt confident enough in my portfolio that I didn't feel like I needed to tweak it all that much.

"Funny seeing you hear Ms. Y/LN..." Chris said only loudly enough for me to hear.

"Hello Mr. Bang," I said in a professional tone as I looked up at him. His gaze was so much more intense in this setting. He was almost a little too intimidating. He took a step closer to me, still far enough to maintain an inconspicuous distance, but he was definitely closer.

"You know? The last time you referred to me as Mr. Bang, it was on a piece of paper that you left before you fled away from the apartment," he said quietly, again. If anyone was looking over at us, they would think that this was just an innocent conversation between and professor and his student, but he was referring to something much much more personal.

"I believe that the note was meant to thank you, not offend you, sir," I said matching his volume, a slight bite in my tone. "Thank you for class," I said with a smile, "See you on Thursday." I walked away from his desk, meeting Wonnie outside and I could feel him staring at me as I left.

We walked back to the apartment not speaking to each other at all, afraid that someone may be able to hear our conversation. When we got there, Won was the first to break the silence. "HOLY SHIT DUDE! Are you okay?" she asked the minute we got inside, away from anyone that could possibly hear us.

"I really don't know. I feel like I haven't stopped shaking," and it was true. My palms were sweaty and I got the chills every time I thought about the last encounter I had with Chris before today.

"Well I mean! You kinda fucked our professor. Well, you know, you didn't know he was our professor at the time, but still you like fully slept with him!" Wonyoung yelled as she made her way to the kitchen. I threw myself on the couch and covered my face with a pillow. "Did he tell you that he worked at the school?" she asked.

"NO! We didn't talk about our private lives at all! Except that he told me he was starting a new job and that that was the reason why he moved here, but fuck I didn't know the job was gonna be here!" I yelled back. I pulled myself off of the couch and walked over to meet Wonyoung in the kitchen. "Won, what the fuck am I gonna do?" I asked as I grabbed myself a glass of water.

"Suck it up and stay professional? It was a one night stand. You're so close to graduating, Y/NN. You can stick it out for one more semester," she reassured me.

She was right, and that was exactly what I was gonna do. One semester wouldn't be that bad. Right?

#bang chan x female reader #bang chan x reader #bang chan #stray kids #stray kids smut #skz bang chan #skz fanfic #stray kids fanfic #stray kids college au #bang chan college au #bang chan x y/n #bang chris #christopher bang

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kurunlulu · 6 months

Text

A (shaky) Mikoto Double Color Analysis

Tl;dr 4koto

Throughout Double there are 5 prominently shown colors, not just red and blue (John and Mikoto) despite the mv being primarily John's POV and him only being aware of Mikoto's existence, he was literally just born I don't think we can expect him to know how systems work or that Mikoto isn't the only other alter.

The main 5 colors I noticed were red and blue of course, but also green, pink, orange. I counted orange as its own alter originally, but then realized orange is also often used to represent red/John. I can only make sense of this assuming different variations of the same color (for example, different shades of pink) represent the same alter. There's a few blues that appear, a few pinks, and a few greens, and a mix of orangey-reds.

Some of these are from inverts, of colors turning into pink or green, but some are very much so standalone the color appearing.

Green and red background with blue and pink and (cut off) red text. So these are blue, pink and red's thoughts? With the background shifting from green to red, to indicate John fronting.

Red, green

Pink, red, green

I can't even screenshot it because I keep missing the frames but in this scene it also shows green silhouette which then inverts to a static overlay of a pink color, which then happens again at the door.

Finally caught the pink on the running scene.

The running scene is the most interesting to me as it shows the most.

In order, it's green flashes, then pink, then black with a blurry more monotone background, then quickly white with an orange background. Then it is blue and orange, monotone again, green and pink, orange and blue, THEN specifically orange, pink, green AND blue when it shows the silhouette of three of him running. It shows 4 Mikoto's running and shows 4 different colors.

It does of course flash between other combinations of these colors but like, come on. Showing 4 Mikoto's running away on screen and showing 4 colors... At times the red and the orange look similarly, but this one is most definitely an orange. Especially since the frame after is blue and red, orange in the corner, and then no color Mikoto as the actual? I saw people take this scene as trikoto, but there are 4 Mikoto's shown, as well as a mix of 4 different colors.

I really find it hard to believe they'd write a system character who became a system as an adult, when the writer has a psychology degree and it's very common knowledge DID stems from childhood.

Blacks and white's also often appear, but generally before drastic color changes. So would black and white indicate a 'switch'?

This scene then has blue, orange, pink, green, and a much lighter orange. Are both oranges representing the same alter? Idk lol, it looks more yellowy this time.

I wonder if whether a color is on Mikoto or in the background represents something?

This scene shows the three other alters, pink, blue, and green, but then a ring around them of orange, showing John is controlling the body ultimately at this point maybe?

Red tint fading in and out during a murder

Pink tint panning up which leads into....

Straight up pink background! With a bit of purple? So purple grouped with pink, similarly to how red had been grouped with orange and the two shades of blue are probably supposed to indicate the same alter? I have no idea, it has been 12 hours since this thing even released. What gets me mostly is the blatantly pink backgrounds as well as the pink text, that are very clearly in contrast to the red backgrounds and text.

I keep editing this and adding more on lol, but my general view of this is that Mikoto lived covertly as a system throughout his life, but then when Orekoto/John was formed, it as a lot more overt and different from the previously existing alters who, though incredibly stressed out, were managing to live in 'peace', or at least together enough to hide/not realize that they had DID. It's possible Mikoto is the only alter who was not aware of the DID, as Orekoto is clearly directing comments at someone in their body who is AWARE of what he has done, and terrified of it. Yet Mikoto himself insists he has no idea, and is truly genuinely confused.

#milgram #milgram theory #mikoto kayano #trikoto #double #milgram analysis #am i actually crazy

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nottawriter · 4 months

Text

20 Questions More

This is a deeper and more detailed version of the 20 questions for AO3 fanfic writers. Thanks to @casualsavant for the tag.

1) How do you keep getting ideas for your ship / fandom? Supercorp brainrot… I see a picture or meme or video, I watch a movie or read a synopsis, I hear a song and it reminds me of them. They are ever present in my mind. I cannot escape (nor do I want to) and therefore, you cannot escape :chaos laugh:

2) Which authors inspire you in your fandom, and why are they so freakishly good? There are sooo many super talented people in the Supercorp fandom. I’m constantly impressed and overwhelmed with the volume of amazing content. There are the fandom favs: @lostariels, @jazzfordshire, @searidings, @lynnearlington, @coffeeshib, @mycatismyeditor, @lgbtimelords and @melui-the-bookworm, and there are personal favs: @snowydragonscave, @fazedlight, @casualsavant, @luthordamnvers, @gveret-fic, @briefunknowntrash, @cantdrawshaw, @karalovesallthegirls, @vox-ex, Veritas33 (AO3), @writershapeholeonthedoor… Sooo much talent. I just want to read all the time!

3) Aside from the characters of your main ship, who are the characters you love to write? I love all the side characters. I think the relationships in Supergirl are what make Kara and Lena so great and relatable. After Kara and Lena, I think I’m most comfortable writing Alex, but I enjoy writing almost everyone. My WHBL series is an ensemble-cast style story that is primarily Lena pov, but has other povs throughout.

4) Are there pairings or tropes you know for sure you’d never write about? Which ones? I’m not a fan of writing Kara or Lena outside of Supercorp unless in reference to their past relationships. I’m not sure if I would rule any specific trope out completely

5) What is your writing process and why is it cursed? Sav’s answer for this one is pretty relatable lol but uh… I typically put notes in my phone if I don’t have paper/pen handy. I use Excel to plot out timelines and chapters. I like to use color to show what I still need to write versus what’s done or what’s uncertain. I use a simple Word doc and typically write in story order, though if I write a scene I like, but don’t like it’s placement, I’ll cut it out and save it separately for potentially using later or in a different fic. I struggle with writer’s block, anxiety, guilty, sooo much uncertainty. It’s stressful and sometimes overwhelming… But I’m still here, so I suppose getting the story out into the world is all worth it in the end.

6) What is your favorite part of your writing process? I enjoy the research, having something completed and ready to post (if not the anxiety of actually posting), and I enjoy reading the comments

7) What’s the weirdest thing you’ve had to research for a fic? Um, probably sniper rifle stuff

8) Is there a particular writing rule you struggle with (grammar, spelling, tense, reality in general)? I catch myself switching tense all the time. I try to catch it all in editing, but don’t always succeed.

9) What was your hardest scene to write so far and why? Pretty much all of Evermore because it’s Kara’s dreamscape with mixed references to Wizard of Oz and Edgar Allen Poe’s The Raven combined with The Adjudicator’s last scene. I think it actually came out well, but it’s really different and specific, so it’s gotten low interaction.

10) Have your characters ever done something you didn’t expect, changing your plot completely? 100%

11) If you could converse with any of the characters, who would it be and why? I would be in awe to meet Kara or Lena. They’re iconic and these huge symbols for so many feelings and thoughts I’ve tried to convey, but they’re also very relatable characters who’ve suffered through much. I hope I do them justice with my writing. I know others do it so much better... I would also love to meet Melissa or Katie. I hope they know how many lives they've impacted for the better.

12) What are some of the tropes or themes that you find yourself returning to in your writing? Originally, I wrote a lot of mental health themes and hurt/comfort, currently it’s fluff and smut or rom-com. I guess it depends a lot on what emotional headspace I’m in and capable of conveying. Almost always there’s some angst, but I gotta have a happy ending. Whether I’m reading or writing. A happy ending always.

13) What’s your most important resource as a writer? Talking with other writers! I’ve been so thankful to meet so many great ones this year <3

14) Can you share some of your strategies for editing and revising your work? I do many rereads, before and after I post. I will go back and reread before I add more to a story as well, esp if it’s been a while since I wrote for it. I’ve also gotten someone else to read over fics from time to time.

15) Which is worse: making the summary, picking the tags, or the anxiety when you post your fic? All of that gives me anxiety lol

16) How do you define success for your fanfic - hits? Kudos? Comments? Bookmarks? Or just if you like it? I try really hard not to define “success” when it comes to my writing. You never know what other people are going to like or connect with. First and foremost, I write for me. Secondly, I write for the enjoyment of others. I like to see kudos, but ultimately it’s the comments that are most encouraging. Seeing even just 1 person connect with a story that I wrote… there’s no feeling like that.

17) Do you have a playlist for your favorite character / ship? I don’t, but there are songs or artists I associate with the characters, esp Supercorp- Taylor Swift, Hozier, Lord Huron… Not the question, but there’s a video edit by @talconnect with Running with the Wolves that fits perfectly for Kara. https://twitter.com/TalArtM/status/1658567350046674967 I love it.

18) If fan art was going to be made from your work, which fic would you pick and which fan artist would you like to create it? I recently commissioned a piece for one scene in I Believe in a Thing Called Love and there are a couple of other scenes in that one that I would have done. Really, I would appreciate any scene though. It would be an honor to have someone chose one of my works for something like that and I would be stoked to see any of it.

19) How many WIPs do you currently have? Active WIPs: 4 (What Has Been Lost, Wouldn’t It Be Nice, I Believe in a Thing Called Love, and Tis the Damn Season); Mayhem WIP idea to be started soon. A few others always percolating

20) What’s your advice to new fanfic writers? I had no idea what I was doing or that I even wanted to write when I started. You can’t improve until you try. You can’t learn until you make mistakes. Just try. I’ll keep Sav’s advice as well: Write for yourself. Write what you’d want to see. You’ll get better at it over time.

My fics: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Notta_Writer/works Tagging but no pressure: @itsalliebitheway @jetgirl1832 @flyingpotstickers @sneezewizard

#supercorp #supercorp fanfic

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kingsofeverything · 1 year

Note

Did you post your own top ten fics of 2022? I’d love to see one of my favorite author’s top pics. 😀

i did not! but here they are, in abc order because why not:

Ace of Spades by @allwaswell16 what can i say? it's anitra and it's pirates and it's alpha louis/omega harry AND i have an in with nic @louandhazaf. she betas for anitra so i get to hear about how excited nic is about the fic and how good it is. hypes me up :D

baby, you're the end of june by @disgruntledkittenface hello, it's maggie with accidental courting alpha harry! what's not to love? and again, nic betas for maggie, so i'm pre-hyped for the fic before it posts

Counteract by YesIsAWorld @louandhazaf ok so i wanted this pov switch from the second i read the original scene in Counterbalance and it exceeded all expectations. Louis with that tattoo?? AND it was for @wankersday so twice as nice!

Darling, so it goes by @disgruntledkittenface GRACE KELLY AU!!!! i waited for this fic and it sooooooo delivered. not to rub it in lol but nic betaed this fic and THE PRAISE i heard throughout that process, plus the snippets on tumblr had me so excited for it to post. and istg i wasn't ready! it's so so so good.

Down To Be a Distraction by QuickedWeen @becomeawendybird horny model harry and footie louis? tbh i don't need to say more because it's molly and all of her fics are amazing

For the Right Reasons by @juliusschmidt a bachelor au! i've never even watched the show but i loved reading this as a wip

I Want You (Won’t You Say So) by LadyLondonderry @londonfoginacup emmu's annual fic for @wankersday NEVER disappoints. so so creative and funny and re-re-readable.

Of Mates and Men by @bananaheathen the longest fic i've ever read, and i loved every second. so much good communication! so much love!

Remember Me Before You by me. i know i know i know. BUT i lived inside this fic for like half the year and 1/3 of last year. x

Mr. Tuesday by @jaerie i just loved harry and louis in this fic and they live on inside my head

this has been sitting in my drafts for weeks. sorry for the wait, anon!

#fic rec #hope all the links are right

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toni-kirkwood99 · 2 months

Text

This is my first ever post on here. That's mine, so talk to me nice, please🥹🫶🏿💯. I've never done warnings before, so if I miss something, please let me know! I'll have to figure out how to fix it and edit this post. I've never done that before either...😅

⚠️WARNINGS ⚠️

Mentions of pussy eating, reader has female anatomy, pussy eating, begging brat reader, daydream fuck, vaginally sex, passionate sex, oral fem receiving, mention of bunny and hun bun for a nickname (no pet play tho), daddy nicknames for him, breading, vaginal creampie, squirting, cow-girl, mating press, suggestive sex at the end, Choking (slightly and gently), use of colors for safe words, brat reader, chaotic switch reader (mostly pillow princess but a switch), soft dom switch male, mostly a wholesome situation turned into a wet daydream honestly lol, healthy strong relationship✅️, fluff but NSFW 🔞, ageless blogs will be blocked, No Minors Please🙏🏾💯

⚠️END WARNINGS⚠️

Reader POV*

*We just came inside from hammocking because it started raining, and you didn't want us to get sick*

You ask me if I'd like hot Cocoa. To which I replied yes. I'd never turn down a good cup of Cocoa.

We just had a very intimate yet innocent quality time together. But as you make our drinks, I can't help but let my eyes drift. Let them wander over every expanding and contracting muscle. While you do something as simple as making 2 cups of hot cocoa, it stirs something up inside me.

I sit at the island stool across from you and run my fingertips across the countertop and imagine all the sweet yet nasty things you could do to my body.

I envision you looking up at me like a lion, thirsty, ready to drink from the watering hole for the first time in days. The same way you'd look at me, thirsty ready to taste what's between my meaty thighs that you so gently caressed, kneaded, and rubbed outside on the hammock. With nothing but love and care, but I can't help that my mind takes me to far away places, dirty places.

Places where you have me underneath you (after making me cum with your mouth because you're a gentleman And oh so gentle with me)

*wet dream while you make Hot Cocoa*

You grab me by my thighs and pull me to the edge of the bed. Before you even truly start anything after the amazing earth shattering head you gave me and the two back to back orgasms.

You say, “if at any point you want to stop, tell me. I'll always ask you what color you are throughout the whole experience. If you want me to stop, say red, slow down is yellow, and keep going is green. Got it baby?”

I'm so hot and bothered I respond a bit more rude than I meant to, “I know I know. Just fuck me already! I want you so bad.”

You just smile and laugh through your nose at my impatience. For that you decided to tease me a bit more. You caress my face and lean down to kiss me softly and slowly. I melt into the kiss. Even more when you line your tip up with my clit and start rubbing your sex in my slick and moaning into the kiss.

At this point I'm already soaked so this does wonders for you, but it isn't enough friction for me. I start whining and it's like music to your ears for a few minutes. You wait patiently as you continue for your favorite part. Making me beg.

I whine, “baby ‘tis feels good but I want more."

You pull away and smile at me, “you know the magic word that would give you everything you want right now baby, you just gotta say it and talk to me nice hun bun.”

I melt at the nickname. You could call me anything, and it would make me weak in the knees. Because it's you. I blush and get a bit embarrassed. You caress my cheeks and give me another kiss for encouragement and slow down your grinding. To an agonizingly slow pace for me but a delicious one for you.

“Can you please make love to me babe, I want you so bad, please?” I ask sweetly.

You smile a sweet prideful smile and say, “of course baby, your wish is my command.”

With that you kiss down my body one last time. Kiss lick and suck my clit and make sure I'm wet enough to take you (which I am beyond wet enough lol). You come back up and kiss me long and passionately.

You ask, “color?” and I reply “green” with a loving smile.

You smile back and line your tip up with my entrance. You ask once more just to make sure but my answer remains unchanged.

You push in slowly and watch as my eyes get lower and I start to whine and rotate my hips a bit at the stretch of you.

You ask again, “color hun bun”

To which I replied “still green baby~ it feels so good~”

As I reach out both of my hands for yours and you gladly take them. Interlocking them.

“You feel amazing, bunny. I can't wait to be all the wa-” you groan.

My coochie slowly sucks you in the rest of the way. Slurping you up in my sticky wet heat; like a hot babe at the beach would throat a popsicle on a hot summer's day.

You instantly grab my throat and ask for a color as you apply the perfect amount of pressure that you know I like.

“still green baby~” I say as you keep the pressure I like on my throat and notice again how my pussy squeezes a bit tighter when you squeeze a little tighter.

You love how nasty I can be. It turns you on so much. You do a few experimental rolls of your hip and I am keening for you.

You say, “baby i'm gonna go fast, but if you need me to slow down let me know okay?”

And I melt. You always prioritize me and my wants and needs over your own. It makes me feel so safe and loved. This intimacy is how I repay you. By showing you just how much I trust you with my body. How much I care for you with this dance we do every night.

“I don't need to, you always take care of me, you're my sexy amazing daddy and future baby daddy after all~.” I say it with the utmost confidence. And with a knowing smirk.

Knowing that talking like that gets you going and places one thing on your mind on repeat. This is your pussy forever, and since it's yours you're gonna claim it. Breed me if I ask for it. Cause you'd give me the world on a silver platter if you could.

You look me deep in my eyes with love and lust, “baby can I cum inside you tonight? You know when you talk like that all I wanna do is breed my pussy.”

And If I were on my hands and knees like I normally would be, my knees would have buckled. But I'm on my back in a mating press, nose to nose with my soulmate.

I airily say, “take me, and breed me, I'm all yours, future baby daddy~” and that's what makes you snap.

You piston your hip in my dripping heat and grip my thighs to keep me from moving around too much from the force of your hips rutting into mine.

Your big breeder balls are slapping against my ass as you pound into me with one thing on your mind.

Breed breed breed.

I moan your name loudly, your given name and a string of nicknames that make your heart melt.

Even in your breeder frenzy you still ask, “color, baby?! What color?”

And I respond lustfully, even with my cloudy mushy fucked out brain, “So good baby~ it's so… soooo good~ I'm… I’m green~ green~.”

You smile at the fact that you've barely started and I’m already a fucked out mess. Dripping all over your cock and squeezing like a vice from time to time because of the deliciously hard fluid strokes you're giving me. Kissing my cervix deliciously without fail with every stroke.

You move your hand from my throat up to my jawline. Using your thumb to brush against my lips. I stick out my tongue and give it a kitten lick. You push your thumb in my mouth, and I suck it. You groan at my obedience. Even when my brain is mush. I'm still your good girl. To reward me, you place your hand back in my throat and squeeze the way I like, and I moan your name like a prayer. A mantra if you will.

You notice when my eyes roll back and I drool a bit. My pussy, your pussy, starts to convulse. So you press down on my lower stomach so I can feel you deeper. That's what makes me scream your name as I cum.

You smile with pride as I come undone on your cock. Even more so as you pound me through my first orgasm into my second and make me scream your name as I squirt all over your cock for the umpteenth time. But each time you count them. Every. Single. One. This is number 28, you want to hit 30 by the end of tonight at least. But I don't know about that little game you play in your head. Keeping score because you want to make sure you're actually pleasing me (so much better and unlike the men from my past).

You slow down to try to be gentle with me, knowing how sensitive I get after squirting.

I whine with a hint of mischief in my tone. “Come here, please, baby~ kiss~?” I ask so sweetly, how could you say no?

You leaned down to kiss me sweetly but I licked your bottom lip, and in your shocked state I slipped my tongue in. I make out with you.

You were pleasantly surprised. Your submissive pillow princess was ever so bold tonight. You couldn't be more proud and turned on if you tried.

When I break away I whisper in your ear, “lay down on your back for me baby, please~”

You do it without question. And I get in cow-girl position facing you. Lining your massive cock up with my entrance and slowly sinking down on it until it's sheathed inside me fully. I moan loud and proud as I take all of you.

I grab one of your hands and place it on my love handles, the other I place on one of my boob. “color?” I ask.

You chuckle and smile, “green baby, always”.

And I smile that smile that shows all three of my dimples and makes your knees weak for me. Then I start grinding, rotating my hips in a circle at a tantalizing slow pace.

You groan cause it feels so good. But your eyes roll back when I do a kegel (tighten my pussy) and start bouncing at a fast pace randomly. I moan and drip and leak all over your cock. One hand grabbing one of your forearms while the other moves my hair out of my face.

“Baby you're so beautiful, you're a goddess and I'm lucky you chose me. Fuck baby! Just like that~” you groan as you watch me fuck myself on your cock.

Nothing turns you on more than when I bounce back on you to get more friction in doggy or bounce myself on your cock in cowgirl or reverse cowgirl when I want you to slap my ass🤭.

I continue to bounce, “I'm the lucky one that you found me, I want your babies so bad, give it to me daddy~ please~ I need it so bad~” I whine with tears in my eyes.

Third orgasm approaching rapidly. You groan at that. Grabbing my love handles and fucking up into me at a rapid pace. Making your orgasm approach quicker.

My eyes roll back and I scream a string of loving nicknames towards you. As I squeeze your cock as I cum & squirt all over your cock for the second time tonight. I unknowingly milk your cock for all its worth in the process of reaching my own peak.

Your eyes rolling back as you say, “fuck baby, cumming~ oh fuuuck take my kids~ have my babies! Baby, please! Oooh FUCK! Please take it~ Take it all!~ Good girl~”

All I can do is whine and moan. Being called your good girl makes me cum again and give you all I have with my last little squirt and orgasm of the night. You fucked me so good and my legs burn from this position.

But I keep you inside me as I lay down on you and snuggle into the crook of your neck. Getting cozy while I use your softening cock as a plug for the cum that would come leaking out if I slid off of you.

I meant it when I asked you to give me your babies. I'm just wanting to take a nap while I give as many of your swimmers a fighting chance as I can.

You rub my back and arms lovingly. Moving my hair out of your face.

“I adore you, you beautiful woman, I always will. In this life and the next.” You say lovingly.

I smile and you can feel it on your neck. It gives you butterflies.

“I adore you, in this life and the next my handsome future husband and baby daddy.” I say.

You smile at that. Knowing something that I don't know. I don't know that you've been waiting for the perfect moment to break out that beautiful velvet black box and pop the question. Already planning out our life together. Already knowing you've found the one you want to spend the rest of your life with. Your soulmate, best friend, and lover wrapped up into one beautiful perfect woman you want to wake up next to every day for the rest of your life. And you smile knowing 100% for a fact that the feeling is mutual.

You smile hearing my soft snores. Knowing that I only snore when i'm super tired. And-

*End daydream*

“Cocoa is done! Do you want marshmallows in your Cocoa love?” you ask.

I blink rapidly at that. Being brought back to reality.

I take a minute to respond. To snap back into reality.

“Yeah always, you know I love marshmallows!” I say with a smile.

You smile back at me sweetly. “Of course I do. Just thought I would ask on the off chance you didn't want them this time. Like that would ever happen! My sweetie is a cannibal for sweets when you're on your period. That's why I'm getting as much chocolate & sugar in your system as I can!” You admit sweetly.

I looked at my phone and just received my notifications from the Flo app that my period should start tomorrow. I forget he has it too to know when he has to be extra nice to me. It makes me tear up a bit.

You turn around to give me the Cocoa and see the tears brimming at my eyelashes. “Oh no honey, are you cramping already?” You ask sweetly, concern written all over your face.

I have to blink away the tears and wipe a few away. “No, not yet anyway. Just feeling a bit overwhelmed that I have such a loving doting partner is all. Never thought I'd find someone like you in a million years.” I say sadly, but truthfully.

You look at me with those sad knowing eyes, and put your mug down. While mine sits on the counter and I play with the ring of the cup. You move around the island and turn me around, so I'm facing you.

“I Love you, I'm real, and I'm not going anywhere. Now you say it too so I know you're real and not a robot [lol].” you say sweetly with a joke at the end to make me laugh. I do.

After my fit of giggles, “I love you, I'm real, and I'm not going anywhere either.” I say and hug you around your waist and snuggle into your chest. You start to laugh again and I know what you're going to say before you say it.

“I am not a robot!” I shout, and that makes you laugh harder.

We both laugh, and it's another great night. Another night snuggled up on the couch watching back to back movies and cuddling. You grab us snacks and drinks. Nothing but sweet loving innocent intimacy. Until I change that… Eventually…

My anime husband's that give off this vibe (same age or aged up for some cause no I would never f*** a minor🗣📣💯)

#Demon slayer-

#Giyu tomioka♡

#Kyojuro rengoku

#Sanemi shinazugawa

#Tengen uzui (I want his hot wives more than him ngl☠️💯)

#Inosuke Hashibira

#Tanjiro kamado

#Gyutaro

#Muzan jackson (hee hee🌙🚶‍♂️🕺🎤🎶)

#Tokyo Ghoul-

#Juuzou Suzuya♡

#All out-

#Sekizan Takuya♡

#Iwashamizu Sumiaki♡

#My hero academia-

#Katsuki Bakugo ♡

#Izuku Midoriya ♡♡♡

#Tomura Shigaraki ♡

#Tamaki Amajiki ♡♡♡

#Chainsaw man-

#Denji ♡♡♡

#One punch man-

#Genos ♡♡♡

#Jujutsu Kaisen-

#Satoru Gojo

#Megumi fushiguro

#Kento Nanami

#Mahito </3 (idk what makes me so wet for this mf monster, bro)

#Choso ♡♡

#Toge Inumaki ♡♡

#Seven deadly sins-

#Ban ♡ (in a world with no Elaine lol)

#Inuyasha-

#Sesshomaru ♡

#Naruto-

#Neji Hyuga ♡♡

#Kakashi Hatake ♡♡♡

#Gaara ♡♡

#Kiba Inuzuka♡

#Blue lock-

#Bachira Meguru ♡♡♡

#Chigiri Hyouma

#Kunigami Rensuke

#Nagi Seishirou♡♡

#Barou Shouei

#Black clover-

#Luck Voltia♡♡

#Nozel Silva♡

#Fuegoleon Vermillion ♡

#Mereoleona Vermilion♡♡♡

#William Vangeance♡♡

#Jack the Ripper

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eomma-jpeg · 9 months

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In The Meadow - Music Analysis

i said i was gonna post bc i love music analysis and i love my beloved characters, so if you too have an obsession, then this is for you.

The Playlist

I think I may just go down the line

The Meadow - Nickel Creek

This song was one that i just happened to be listening to when I started writing ‘in the meadow’ but i liked it and the kind of… building and dynamic of the relationship in the song that I decided to use the song as inspiration and where i get all the chapter titles lol

Ultimately the relationship in the song doesn’t go anywhere, but the narrator still hears that person they decided to fall in love with, and they use the echo of a voice in the meadow as their reminder and it just,,,, i liked it so much and i still listen to it multiple times a day lol

You and Me - Lifehouse

So this song is specifically on here because of this comic by faestorian

It just…. Yeah, there’s not much to say except its from Knives perspective… and I love him and how easily distracted he is by her.

Not Strong Enough - boygenius

This song,,, just has Knives written all over it. Specifically these lines

I don't know why I am

The way I am

Not strong enough to be your man

I tried, I can't

Stop staring at the ceiling fan and

Spinning out about things that haven't happened

Breathing in and out

I just think it shows Knives’ overthinking and eventual kind of decision that he thinks he’s not enough for her or could never be worthy of the kind of benevolence she gives him, and so he’s trapped in his own mind about stuff

The line ‘i don’t know why i am the way I am’ is repeated throughout the song and… i just felt like knives is always asking himself why he is this way even though he knows but at the same time he doesn’t know why he and vash reacted so differently to the same trauma and its just so frustrating for him.

Also the line ‘Always an angel, never a God’.... thats a good line, especially in the knives context

Liar - Paramore

So liar was on here initially as a millyons song, but has since undergone a vashmeryl transformation, so the song applies to the both of them

Its just a song about how you tried to hide things about yourself from the person you love to keep them safe, but ultimately you realize that the person who you wanted to keep safe was the one doing the protecting, and you don’t know why you ever needed to lie to them

I love this in a millyons context bc i think Knives at first tried to hide himself from Milly, and then ultimately realized ‘why am i doing that? She’s only trying to help me’

It takes a lot for the boy to accept help

In a vashmeryl context, its the both of them… but mostly vash

They just cant figure out why they tried to hide from one another, when its obvious they care so deeply

This second verse is so good for vashmeryl

I got too good at fighting chemicals

And dodging arrows I was asking for

Wading through the fog and then it disappeared

Naked when I'm here

And why should I deny what's all

At once, so crystal clear

And i just really like paramore a lot

The Bomb - Florence + the Machine

This song,,,, geez

I initially liked this song for knives and milly, but it works so much better as a song from meryl’s perspective about vash.

It just is told from the pov of a person who has fallen for someone who never does any good for themselves, always getting hurt or hurting others in the process. The line 'unavailability is the only thing that turns you on’ is so raw and very good for meryl as a person who just thinks that vash lives in this constant of ‘i want so many things i can never have’ and thinks he can never have them

And yet meryl is always there to try and give him anything

And then the second half of the song it switches, the narrator is now explaining that that is what they have fallen for, the destruction and unavailability and the chaos

They just love to convince themselves that they love each other for the worst reasons.

Savior Complex - Phoebe Bridgers

So savior complex was added to accompany the idea that Milly herself has one, and this song is just one of my all time favorites and I needed it to be included

The relationship in the song is kind of implied to go poorly (as most one sided savior complex relationships do) but i love the lyrics to the build up

Crocodile tears, run the tap 'til it's clear

Drift off on the floor

I drag you to the shore

Sweating through the sheets

You're gonna drown in your sleep, for sure

I think,,, these lyrics relate quite well to how milly felt in the beginning of ‘in the meadow’, just desperate to help and seeing his own desperation for something different, a change, and Milly decides she going to do whatever it takes to help him through it

Crave - Paramore

I just love paramore. I’d put their entire new album on this playlist if i could

This song is uhhh from Knives’ perspective and his just desire to remember everything about Milly. Every moment of every day is just, he craves it. He wants to be near her even if he doesn’t quite understand why.

The song also delves into like, unhealthy practices and how you still crave those terrible times because of the familiarity,,,,,, and if that isn’t knives i don’t know what is

‘I romanticize even the worst of times’

(You) On My Arm - Leith Ross

This song is just a silly “I would do anything for you” song from Knives’ perspective.

It just talks about the most mundane things and being in love and im just a sap for knives becoming a sap for milly.

Apple Pie - Lizzy McAlpine

This song AHHHH for vashmeryl !!!!!! THE ONE SHOT T-T

It just is about a person who is your home away from home and how no place could be complete without this person and despite moving around and finding new adventures and new beginnings, you wouldn’t be able to do it without that one person

I think that vash is like that about meryl

The story is told from the perspective of a person who is constantly moving and changing, but they need that one consistent of the person they love, and vash is very much that way for me about meryl; he needs to return to her, or at least keep her nearby

Some day we can be in the same city

Some day we'll be grown and I'll be fine with packing up

Cardboard boxes filled and sad farewells

And I'll be fine we'll pack a bag

As long as I don't say goodbye to you as well

I think, eventually vash realizes that home is not a place, because he’s never really had a home except for the seeds ship, and meryl becomes that comfort for him

It’s Alright - Mother Mother

This song… is a doozy

So the main voice of the song is someone overcome with guilt, just unable to kind of forgive themselves for whatever mistakes they’ve made, which I really liked for knives, but the most important part is the second chorus !!!!!

The first chorus is from a first person perspective of the song’s author, but the second chorus is from an outside perspective !!! And I like to think of it as milly comforting knives during moments when he doubts he can be a good person

It's alright, it's okay, it's alright, it's okay

You're not a monster, just a human

And you made a few mistakes

It's alright, it's okay, it's alright, it's okay

You're not gruesome, just human

And you made a few mistakes

Please just,,, listen to the song and tell me the verses don’t just SCREAM knives

Eraser - Ricky Montgomery

So this song i haven’t had a lot of time to dissect this one, but i think its just kind of a perspective of milly trying to comfort knives despite his flaws and feelings of guilt. The first verse is just the narrator figuring out whats going on, and then it moves into the chorus which provides kind of a solution, stating that the “eraser” doesn’t have to ruin their life over something so small.

I just like the comforting aspect. The voice of the song is convincing their target that everything is okay, and even when its not they can work it out together, avoid anyone else and just breathe

Hate to See Your Heart Break - Paramore

Soooo this song is just chapter 23,,,,, and the both of them (mostly milly) just aching inside because she can see his heart breaking over and over again and it kills her inside, so milly just provides solace and comfort in the fact that thats what being a human is. Sometimes it hurts so much, but she’s there to remind him that there is light and she wants to be that light T-T

For all the air that's in your lungs

For all the joy that is to come

For all the things that you're alive to feel

Just let the pain remind you hearts can heal

My heart hurts anytime i listen to this song cuz i can just see like,,, milly comforting knives in any given scenario, desperate to convince him of the good and hating the pain in his expression

A New Kind of Love - Frou Frou

I really like this song for Vashmeryl because its kind of a dance of the mundane, as well as finding the love within

Because the first verse of the song kind of dabbles in the way the love becomes a branded thing, just something you buy or is fleeting, but the voice of the song and whoever they are addressing find a love despite this new kind of love

I just like vash and meryl finding each other in that classic kind of love, and just eventually realize theyve both fallen hard for one another

I also like the verse that talks about how busy each person has become, and the kind of mundane act of disregarding the person you love because you’re afraid of the outcome…. Yeah

Agoraphobia - Autoheart

Yeah this song was put on there specifically for knives and his innate desire never to leave the house again,,, just kind of lock himself away from the scary aspects of the world and life.

Slow Dancing - Aly & Aj

I love this as a vashmeryl song, specifically them getting to know each other after years of knowing each other,,, y’know?

Just the heartfelt act of having been around one another and having fallen deeply in love, but now they have to relearn how to interact, how to behave when someone isn’t hunting you down or chasing you from town to town.

And they both realize it doesn’t need to be fancy or extraordinary,,, it just needs to be real.

Iris - The Goo Goo Dolls

Okay, this song is on everyone’s ship playlist, and it often ends up paired with vashwood, but I liked it as a song from Knives’ perspective for milly

Especially the chorus

And I don't want the world to see me

'Cause I don't think that they'd understand

When everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am

Knives ultimately doesn’t care what anyone else thinks, they don’t have any say in what he does or doesn’t do, but he does care about milly and what she thinks and how she’ll react, and he knows he can always turn to her for comfort, because thats what milly is… pure comfort.

And for the first time in his long life, he wants someone other than Vash to know everything about him

Make You Feel My Love - Adele

Milly and Meryl energy in this one !!!!

Initially i had it as a milly song, where she kind of wants knives to know that no matter what she’s going to be there for him to comfort and offer support whenever

But i do like the idea of Meryl being like,,,, im going to make you understand that i love you no matter the circumstances, rain or shine i will be there and you will accept it because I love you, you DUNCE

Never Ending Summer - Wes Reeve

Uhh i added this song mostly for vibes and because I liked the idea of Milly saying ‘kiss me hard, touch me soft on the weekends’

It’s just a lovely song about like,, love blindness and i think that milly and knives will suffer from that for a bit

Graceland Too - Phoebe Bridgers

So i added this song purely for the line ‘Whatever you want me to do, I will do’, and then the repetition of ‘whatever she wants’ because i like the idea of this song being from Knives’ perspective as he watches milly kind of… unravel ? in moments when she’s working too hard or needs a break from the world, he wants to be there for her.

I just love the idea of unfailing love… and uhhh we won’t read to far into that.

#im about to post chapter 23 !!!!#millyons #millynai #trigun #vashmeryl #music analysis #music appreciation #milly thompson #millions knives #vash the stampede #meryl stryfe

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