#those missing years before canon starts were probably the closest he got but even then the knowledge he couldn't use martial arts | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

half-deadmagicperson · 1 month

Text

PJO Equinox Solstice Exchange

Hi there @fixation-central I'm your gifter for the @pjo-equinox-solstice-exchange

I went with your prompts: Outsider POV, Percy & Leo Valdez, and Percy & Poseidon

Title: Weekend Plans

Warnings: Canon-Typical Violence (Non Descriptive)

I hope you enjoy!

To most people, Percy Jackson was an enigma. Some people thought he was quiet and strange. Others were scared of him. Many of the students at Goode admired him from afar, because they had to admit, he was rather attractive.

They've seen the news articles about his abduction and escape at the age of 12. They whisper about the strange occurrences, like when the band room exploded, and Percy went missing for a while. They notice his intimidating eyes glance around the room taking notice of every possible exit.

The swim team thought he was friendly enough. His classmates were a bit weary. The freshmen were terrified of him, but none of them have seen him as cheery as when he walked into school after winter break.

Percy walked through the halls chatting with a Latino next to him. The two were in their own little world until Mr. Blofis walked over to greet them.

The person with Percy was apparently a transfer student named Leo, from what the people nearby heard. From the looks of it, Leo knew the Jackson-Blofis family well.

The students watched the two of them whenever they were together. Percy, the usually quiet kid, was seen laughing and exchanging inside jokes with Valdez. Other times, the duo would murmur things that others were probably not meant to hear, whispers of ‘celestial bronze’ or ‘Argo’.

Leo was a lot more approachable than Jackson. He was outgoing and charismatic, but his eyes gave out the same ‘seen too many things’ vibes as his friend. When people asked Valdez about why he came to Goode, he would simply state that it was highly recommended to him. It took the students another month or two to figure out he was bunking with the Jackson-Blofis family.

So the students and faculty of Goode watched and observed in silence and left the boys alone. Some classmates, however, were a bit curious.

~~~~~~~~~~~

It was Friday, last period, Jeffery Johnson sat in his usual seat close to the window, next to his buddy, Evan. Directly behind their table was where Jackson and Valdez sat. Jeff remembers the fear at the beginning of the school year when Percy Jackson chose to sit behind him. He had heard all the stories and rumors circulating the school, and he had seen the calculating, green stare in person. Every bit of Jackson unnerved him.

When Valdez joined the school in second semester, Jeff learned that with his current seat, he could hear everything they talked about. A lot of times, it was just idle chatter or comments on whatever the teacher was talking about. Other times, like today, it was conversation that added to the mystery of Percy Jackson.

“So any plans this weekend,” Jackson asked Valdez before class started. As if they don’t live together.

“Not much. I’m gonna continue working on Michael’s new leg and hopefully deliver it to camp by Sunday afternoon.”

Did Jeff hear that correctly? He looked over at Evan who looked equally confused. Jeff shook his head. Leo was probably talking about some robot of his. Then there was the mention of camp.

A few classmates, including Jeff, have heard about some summer camp Jackson attends, sometimes outside of summer. Jeff assumed it was probably one of those camps for troubled children.

Jeff tuned back in to listen to Leo finish his ramble about specs.

“But anyways, how ‘bout you? Got any plans?”

“Yeah, actually, my dad wanted to spend time with me and ‘try mortal beverages’ so we’re going to the closest boba place to the Hudson.”

“Woah, wait, your dad actually wants to spend time with you?”

“I mean, he has wanted to in the past, but usually his brother doesn’t let him. He might even come over for dinner, if he’s not called away, but it’s not very likely. Mom and Paul both said they’d be happy to have him though,” Percy paused before continuing, “As far as the rest of his side of the family goes, he’s not too bad. At least he’s trying.”

The teacher walked in, and the two finished their conversation. The words Jeff heard started stewing in his brain. Percy’s biological dad was rumored to be lost at sea. Also, what did he mean by ‘mortal’? There was so much to unpack here. Jeff needed to get to the bottom of this, and he’ll start by Googling boba shops near the Hudson River.

~~~~~~~~~~

When Jeff got home he devised a plan. He was going to figure out which boba shop Jackson was going to, take Evan with him, and see if he can learn anything. Was this stalking? Maybe, but it could just be pure coincidence that he and Evan were at the shop the same time as Jackson and his dad.

With a plan in place, he headed off to bed, his mind reeling with theories.

~~~~~~~~~

Okay, so maybe he didn’t entirely think this through. Jeff and Evan have been sitting at the same table for the past hour and there has been no sign of Percy Jackson. He didn’t know exactly what time Percy would be at the shop, so they arrived when it opened. The owner of the place already called them out for loitering, which led to Jeff buying them more drinks. The two of them were about to give up when the door opened.

Percy Jackson walked in talking to a man. The pair shared an uncanny resemblance. They both shared the same sea green eyes and chiseled build. Despite his intimidating looks, the man was dressed in Birkenstocks and a Hawaiian shirt, like he was going to the beach and not Manhatten in the middle of winter.

The two strolled up to the counter and ordered, idly chatting while they waited for their drinks. Jeff couldn’t hear them until they walked over to a booth in the corner.

“Yeah, which reminds me, Mom said she was making that casserole that you really like,” Jackson spoke. His father (?) smiled.

“No matter how many feasts with the finest cooks my brother likes to host, it will never compare to Sally’s cooking.”

“Agreed.”

Jackson’s father decided to take a sip of his drink, almost choking on the tapioca pearls. Percy barely covered up the snort he made. Jeff couldn’t see the teen’s face from this angle, but he was sure he was grinning.

“I forgot to warn you that you have to be careful about the pearls.”

“Yes, I believe it would be a tragic fate if I had to reappear in Olympus because I choked on whatever you said these were called.”

“Boba.”

“Yes, that.”

Olympus??? What was that about? Before Jeff could process it further, the window closest to the corner booth was smashed open. Thankfully, neither he nor Evan were hit by it. Jackson and his dad were both standing at this point, and both very alert. Percy pulled out a pen. What does he need that for?

A gleaming, bronze sword replaced the simple ballpoint that was just in his hands. Jeff gasped. He shook Evan’s shoulder.

“Are you seeing this?”

“You mean Percy yelling at those random kids who smashed the window?” Jeff arched a brow before looking back at the scene.

“You’ve got a lot of nerve coming here,” Jackson’s dad said. Jeff could see where Percy gets his intimidation from.

Jeff’s eyes were messing with him. The image of a group of street kids kept shifting into something more sinister. Jackson’s sword had a similar effect, morphing back and forth between a pen and a weapon. It was like trying to see through a dense fog.

Maybe he was going crazy. Evan didn’t see the sword or the monsters, so maybe he was hallucinating. Jeff’s eyes fixated on the mysterious Percy Jackson as he engaged in battle with the street kids, if they even were kids.

Evan slipped out of his seat before tugging on Jeff’s arm.

“We should get out of here before the cops show up.” Jeff gave a silent nod, still watching the fight. He had just caught a glimpse of floating streams of water before they left the shop.

It was from that day that Jeffery Johnson made it his mission to uncover the secrets of New York that no one has ever dreamed of, starting with one Perseus Jackson.

#percy jackson #leo valdez #pjo #percy jackon and the olympians #cannon typical violence #outsider pov

5 notes · View notes

lunarfly · 3 years

Text

Essay: Harry and Hermione’s chemistry

We all know that Emma and Daniel had excellent chemistry so Harry and Hermione naturally had great chemistry in the movies. It was quite obviously visible. But many book readers have claimed that Harry and Hermione’s chemistry only exists in the movies and they felt they lacked chemistry in the books. It can be quite tricky at first since the book scenes are only imagined in our heads and we can’t see the author’s imagination and her views on the scenes and interactions. But, luckily, canon has provided us with plenty of evidence that Harry and Hermione had excellent chemistry, visible to many people around them. Let’s take a look:

“That was a really horrible trick of Hermione Granger’s,” said Cho fiercely. “She should have told us she’d jinxed that list —”

“I think it was a brilliant idea,” said Harry coldly. Cho flushed and her eyes grew brighter.

“Oh yes, I forgot — of course, if it was darling Hermione’s idea —”

“Don’t start crying again,” said Harry warningly.

It’s very obvious that Cho has noticed how close Harry and Hermione are and she’s jealous, even suspicious that there’s something going on between them. It’s clear that whatever interaction between Harry and Hermione Cho has witnessed, they had chemistry.

If this was all of our evidence of H/Hr’s chemistry, I’d ignore it and assume Cho was only jealous because of their disastrous date when Harry left Cho to see Hermione. Perhaps most of her jealousy came from that scene. But this isn’t all of our evidence. We see even more people being jealous and getting suspicious about H/Hr’s relationship:

When at last they had reached a quiet stretch of ground a short way from the Beauxbatons horses’ paddock, Krum stopped in the shade of the trees and turned to face Harry.

“I vant to know,” he said, glowering, “vot there is between you and Hermyown-ninny.”

Harry, who from Krum’s secretive manner had expected something much more serious than this, stared up at Krum in amazement.

“Nothing,” he said. But Krum glowered at him, and Harry, somehow struck anew by how tall Krum was, elaborated.

“We’re friends. She’s not my girlfriend and she never has been. It’s just that Skeeter woman making things up.”

“Hermy-own-ninny talks about you very often,” said Krum, looking suspiciously at Harry.

“Yeah,” said Harry, “because we’re friends.”

He couldn’t quite believe he was having this conversation with Viktor Krum, the famous International Quidditch player. It was as though the eighteen-year-old Krum thought he, Harry, was an equal — a real rival —

Very interesting indeed. Not only is Krum so jealous that he’s “glowering” (”have an angry or sullen look on one's face; scowl”) at Harry, he also doesn’t believe Harry that he’s just friends with Hermione, even after he explained it very clearly. He still adds how much Hermione talks about Harry, he’s looking suspicious and feels the need of a reconfirmation that H/Hr are not dating. It’s possible that Rita Skeeter’s articles are influencing his thoughts and sure, Hermione talks about Harry a lot (already indicating that she’s very passionate about Harry, we talk about things we like, or feel strong emotions about) and that could be the only thing that makes Krum “suspicious” about H/Hr but would he really still be that jealous if there was absolutely no chemistry between Harry and Hermione? This is definitely a clue on Harry and Hermione’s chemistry in the books.

Another extremely interesting detail is that Harry is enjoying this. He likes the idea of Krum being his equal, a rival! This has nothing to do with their chemistry, of course, but it’s definitely suspicious...

Still think there’s no chemistry between them? Here’s another person who noticed that Harry and Hermione were very close, a little too close:

Harry has at last found love at Hogwarts. His close friend, Colin Creevey, says that Harry is rarely seen out of the company of one Hermione Granger, a stunningly pretty Muggle-born girl who, like Harry, is one of the top students in the school.

So Colin Creevey noticed how much time they spend together, but I just can’t believe that’s the only thing making him believe they’re in love! There has to be some noticeable chemistry between them to come to this conclusion.

I know it’s Rita Skeeter assuming that H/Hr are so close only because they’re dating, but Colin probably told her more than it’s written here. Would Rita believe Colin that Harry and Hermione are boyfriend and girlfriend merely because he said they hang out often? I don’t think so. I think Colin elaborated on his suspicions of H/Hr. But maybe it was just one of Rita Skeeter’s exaggerations. Either way, there’s more proof of their chemistry:

“Are you going to tell us — ?”

Hermione shook her head warningly and glanced at Mrs. Weasley.

“Hello, Hermione,” said Mrs. Weasley, much more stiffly than usual.

“Hello,” said Hermione, her smile faltering at the cold expression on Mrs. Weasley’s face.

Harry looked between them, then said, “Mrs. Weasley, you didn’t believe that rubbish Rita Skeeter wrote in Witch Weekly, did you? Because Hermione’s not my girlfriend.”

“Oh!” said Mrs. Weasley. “No — of course I didn’t!”

But she became considerably warmer toward Hermione after that.

So even Molly believed that Harry and Hermione were boyfriend and girlfriend (and Hermione had ‘broken Harry’s heart’)? Come on, their chemistry was so noticeable that even Molly thought it was believable enough. ...Although Molly does believe everything that newspapers and magazines say. And maybe she didn’t know them well enough because she assumed Hermione could break Harry’s heart.

Still don’t believe that Harry and Hermione had lots of chemistry in the books? Maybe you’re right, we need to actually see the chemistry, not just have others notice it. And guess what? We do get to see their chemistry. This often happens when Ron becomes suspicious of a possible H/Hr relationship. Ron, their closest friend who knows basically everything about them, suspects that Harry and Hermione are secretly in love. And he is quite rightly suspicious of them when we have moments like these demonstrating their perfect chemistry in the books:

“We’ll go down after Quidditch,” Harry assured her. He too was missing Hagrid, although like Ron he thought that they were better off without Grawp in their lives. “But trials might take all morning, the number of people who have applied.” He felt slightly nervous at confronting the first hurdle of his Captaincy. “I dunno why the team’s this popular all of a sudden.”

“Oh, come on, Harry,” said Hermione, suddenly impatient. “It’s not Quidditch that’s popular, it’s you! You’ve never been more interesting, and frankly, you’ve never been more fanciable.”

Ron gagged on a large piece of kipper. Hermione spared him one look of disdain before turning back to Harry.

“Everyone knows you’ve been telling the truth now, don’t they? The whole Wizarding world has had to admit that you were right about Voldemort being back and that you really have fought him twice in the last two years and escaped both times. And now they’re calling you ‘the Chosen One’ — well, come on, can’t you see why people are fascinated by you?”

Harry was finding the Great Hall very hot all of a sudden, even though the ceiling still looked cold and rainy.

“And you’ve been through all that persecution from the Ministry when they were trying to make out you were unstable and a liar. You can still see the marks on the back of your hand where that evil woman made you write with your own blood, but you stuck to your story anyway. . . .”

“You can still see where those brains got hold of me in the Ministry, look,” said Ron, shaking back his sleeves.

“And it doesn’t hurt that you’ve grown about a foot over the summer either,” Hermione finished, ignoring Ron.

“I’m tall,” said Ron inconsequentially.

Wow. Hermione really made up a whole monologue about Harry being fanciable and attractive! If this conversation doesn’t convince you that there was chemistry between them, probably nothing will. Let’s analyze this scene:

Hermione starts talking about Harry and how fanciable he is, how interesting he is, how attractive looks and qualities he has, going on and on... Hermione is clearly showing her interest in Harry and basically flirting with him. But what interests me is this moment:

Harry was finding the Great Hall very hot all of a sudden, even though the ceiling still looked cold and rainy.

He’s actually blushing. Hermione’s compliments have a very obvious effect on him. But something that fascinates me more is the way this is written. He isn’t just blushing, no. Harry never said something like:

Harry was feeling his face growing very hot all of a sudden.

Instead, we have the Great Hall going “very hot”. It isn’t just his face and his blush, it’s the whole hall. This indicates clear tension between Harry and Hermione.

You could say that all of these compliments that Hermione is giving Harry are just facts and reasons why other girls find him attractive. But this isn’t the case. There’s obvious romantic tension between them.

Another thing to note is Ron’s jealousy. He “gags on a large piece of kipper” and he keeps interrupting Hermione, saying and showing why he is fanciable too. The chemistry is undeniable at this point.

You could argue that Hermione was complimenting Harry to make Ron jealous, that his suspicions were expected and intended. And it does seem so at first sight: Hermione compliments Harry in front of Ron, also being very impatient as if she had been planning this conversation, as well as pointing out lots of “fanciable” things that apply to Ron as well (the scars, the height), ignoring Ron to make him more jealous. You may be tricked into thinking so. But this isn’t the case.

First of all, if she wanted to make Ron jealous, don’t you think Hermione would’ve been enjoying the reaction? Why is she giving him these “looks of disdain”(note that this isn’t the first time she has given him nasty looks)? Wouldn’t she be looking away from him, smiling to herself? At least looking a little pleased?

And if she really wanted to make Ron jealous, why would she use Harry of everyone? Maybe because he and Ron had a lot of similarities that could be convenient for making him jealous? But this isn’t like Hermione at all. This isn’t her technique of making people jealous.

“What’s happened to you?” asked Harry, for Hermione looked distinctly disheveled, rather as though she had just fought her way out of a thicket of Devil’s Snare.

“Oh, I’ve just escaped — I mean, I’ve just left Cormac,” she said. “Under the mistletoe,” she added in explanation, as Harry continued to look questioningly at her.

“Serves you right for coming with him,” he told her severely.

“I thought he’d annoy Ron most,” said Hermione dispassionately. “I debated for a while about Zacharias Smith, but I thought, on the whole —”

“You considered Smith?” said Harry, revolted.

“Yes, I did, and I’m starting to wish I’d chosen him, McLaggen makes Grawp look a gentleman. Let’s go this way, we’ll be able to see him coming, he’s so tall. . . .”

Hermione picks the people Ron despises the most to make him jealous - like Cormac McLaggen and Zacharias Smith. Hermione had no reason to use Harry to make Ron jealous. She had no reason to make Ron jealous at all. So that argument is definitely debunked.

Could Hermione have told Harry all of these things because she really didn’t mean them and was just pointing them out from a different teenage girl’s point of view? That just can’t be the case. Otherwise she would’ve been complimenting Ron too. If the only purpose for this speech was to show Harry his attractive traits, she would’ve laughed at Ron’s remarks and agreed that he was fanciable too in other girls’ eyes because he had many of the same “fanciable” traits.

So Hermione was definitely showing her attraction towards Harry which is also made obvious by Harry’s reaction to it and the romantic tension between them that even Ron couldn’t deny.

Believe it or not, this isn’t the only moment when Harry and Hermione are literally flirting. Take a look at another scene of Ron third wheeling Harry and Hermione and looking suspicious:

As they came into the castle they spotted Cormac McLaggen entering the Great Hall. It took him two attempts to get through the doors; he ricocheted off the frame on the first attempt. Ron merely guffawed gloatingly and strode off into the Hall after him, but Harry caught Hermione’s arm and held her back.

“What?” said Hermione defensively.

“If you ask me,” said Harry quietly, “McLaggen looks like he was Confunded this morning. And he was standing right in front of where you were sitting.” Hermione blushed.

“Oh, all right then, I did it,” she whispered. “But you should have heard the way he was talking about Ron and Ginny! Anyway, he’s got a nasty temper, you saw how he reacted when he didn’t get in — you wouldn’t have wanted someone like that on the team.”

“No,” said Harry. “No, I suppose that’s true. But wasn’t that dishonest, Hermione? I mean, you’re a prefect, aren’t you?”

“Oh, be quiet,” she snapped, as he smirked.

“What are you two doing?” demanded Ron, reappearing in the doorway to the Great Hall and looking suspicious.

“Nothing,” said Harry and Hermione together, and they hurried after Ron. The smell of roast beef made Harry’s stomach ache with hunger, but they had barely taken three steps toward the Gryffindor table when Professor Slughorn appeared in front of them, blocking their path.

Try denying their chemistry here.

Just imagine two (straight) friends of the opposite gender, the boy grabbing the girl’s arm and turning her around (the tension!!!) and her acting all defensive, and then the boy telling her something that makes her blush and admit something while whispering. Then the boy jokingly teasing her about it and smirking while the girl tells him to be quiet playfully. Yeah, that’s called flirting and they have extremely obvious chemistry.

The funnier part is Ron noticing this and suspiciously confronting Harry and Hermione while they quickly say “nothing” at the same time and catch up with him.

I don’t think an explanation is even necessary, anyone who denies their chemistry in this scene is basically lying to themselves and is willingly blinding themselves.

Here’s another interesting scene from HBP with Ron getting jealous of H/Hr’s chemistry once again:

Malfoy looked rather as he had done the time Hermione had punched him in the face. Hermione turned to Harry with a radiant expression and whispered, “Did you really tell him I’m the best in the year? Oh, Harry!”

“Well, what’s so impressive about that?” whispered Ron, who for some reason looked annoyed. “You are the best in the year — I’d’ve told him so if he’d asked me!”

Hermione smiled but made a “shhing” gesture, so that they could hear what Slughorn was saying. Ron looked slightly disgruntled.

Here Harry and Hermione’s chemistry isn’t really made clear but just look at the way Hermione turns to Harry. He literally sees her expression as “radiant” (this adjective has also been used to describe Ginny’s smile) and Hermione looks simply delighted. They were clearly having a great moment here, so good, in fact, that Ron becomes jealous and annoyed and tries to pretend Harry’s compliment wasn’t a big deal. He compliments Hermione the same way as Harry did but she doesn’t have such a “radiant” smile this time, does she? Instead she shushes him(poor Ron just wanted attention from his future wife!). Ron has every right to be disgruntled in this scene.

This is the third time in HBP that Ron is third-wheeling Harry and Hermione. Whether anti-H/Hrs want to admit it or not, Ron is a third-wheel to Harry and Hermione very often and becomes very jealous of their chemistry. JKR, it really isn’t funny, where are the R/Hr flirting moments? They’re supposed to be the endgame couple, aren’t they? Why do you have so many moments between Harry and Hermione when they’re clearly flirting and demonstrating what excellent chemistry looks like?

Apparently, Harry and Hermione have had such chemistry in the past that, even when they’re not flirting, Ron still becomes suspicious of Harry and Hermione’s ‘possible secret relationship’:

“Because she was crying,” Harry continued heavily.

“Oh,” said Ron, his smile fading slightly. “Are you that bad at kissing?”

“Dunno,” said Harry, who hadn’t considered this, and immediately felt rather worried. “Maybe I am.”

“Of course you’re not,” said Hermione absently, still scribbling away at her letter.

“How do you know?” said Ron in a sharp voice.

“Because Cho spends half her time crying these days,” said Hermione vaguely. “She does it at mealtimes, in the loos, all over the place.”

Ron suspected that Harry and Hermione had kissed before. His suspects are quite obvious, judging from the tone of his voice. No matter how insecure Ron is, he is still their best friend, he should know that they’re not interested into each other romantically. But it seems like it’s so apparent to everyone that Harry and Hermione have something going on.

Here’s another moment showing us Harry and Hermione’s chemistry:

“Harry!” Hermione cried.

“I know!” Harry shouted. Unable to contain himself, he punched the air; it was more than he had dared to hope for. He strode up and down the tent, feeling that he could have run a mile; he did not even feel hungry anymore. Hermione was squashing Phineas Nigellus’s portrait back into the beaded bag; when she had fastened the clasp she threw the bag aside and raised a shining face to Harry.

“The sword can destroy Horcruxes! Goblin-made blades imbibe only that which strengthen them — Harry, that sword’s impregnated with basilisk venom!”

“And Dumbledore didn’t give it to me because he still needed it, he wanted to use it on the locket —”

“— and he must have realized they wouldn’t let you have it if he put it in his will —”

“— so he made a copy —”

“— and put a fake in the glass case —”

“— and he left the real one — where?”

They gazed at each other; Harry felt that the answer was dangling invisibly in the air above them, tantalizingly close. Why hadn’t Dumbledore told him? Or had he, in fact, told Harry, but Harry had not realized it at the time?

“Think!” whispered Hermione. “Think! Where would he have left it?”

“Not at Hogwarts,” said Harry, resuming his pacing.

“Somewhere in Hogsmeade?” suggested Hermione.

“The Shrieking Shack?” said Harry. “Nobody ever goes in there.”

“But Snape knows how to get in, wouldn’t that be a bit risky?”

“Dumbledore trusted Snape,” Harry reminded her.

“Not enough to tell him that he had swapped the swords,” said Hermione.

“Yeah, you’re right!” said Harry, and he felt even more cheered at the thought that Dumbledore had had some reservations, however faint, about Snape’s trustworthiness. “So, would he have hidden the sword well away from Hogsmeade, then? What d’you reckon, Ron? Ron?”

Harry looked around. For one bewildered moment he thought that Ron had left the tent, then realized that Ron was lying in the shadow of a lower bunk, looking stony.

Just look at the intensity of this scene!

Firstly, when Harry and Hermione find out exciting news, they figure it out themselves and alone, they didn’t even think of Ron. Then look at how happy Harry and Hermione are feeling, their hopes high, their spirits lifted, their excitement causing the tension! Hermione’s face is “shining”!

Then they start discussing, knowing what the other is thinking and finishing each other’s sentences! The way they interact is precious, they’re “gazing” at each other, feeling something “tantalizingly close.” They start whispering. It’s so intense and full of tension and chemistry. They’re so excited. They even completely forgot about Ron(I feel so bad for him), Harry even thought that he had left.

This is one of the strongest Harmione scenes ever, the chemistry between them is incomparable to anyone else’s. Just imagine being Ron right now, watching the love of your life have this intense conversation with your and her best friend, sharing this exciting moment, experiencing all of this without you. And you just sit there and watch. Just watch. Ron’s jealousy, intensified by the horcrux, was the one thing that made him leave Harry and Hermione in the tent. And Ron did have a reason to be jealous.

So they do have chemistry in the books, everyone sees it, including Harry and Hermione’s dates, their closest friend, their “families”, their fans. Everyone except for anti-Harmiones. I tried making up excuses for why others assume Harry and Hermione are together, that maybe I’m misinterpreting something and it’s not because of their chemistry. But when you put everything together, it should become obvious. You have to be insanely biased and willingly ignore everything to come to the conclusion that they don’t have any chemistry.

I’m not even going in detail about physical contact between them. It would take too long. They grab each other’s hand/arm, they hold onto each other for strength and protect each other, they’re very comfortable with hugs and kisses and their physical connection is another piece of proof of their undeniable chemistry.

Even JKR has admitted that they had some “charged moments” in DH in the tent, which is her way of saying that they had intense chemistry:

[Kloves] felt a certain pulll between them at that point. And I think he's right. There are moments when [Harry and Hermione] touch, which are charged moments. One when she touches his hair as he sits on the hiltop reading about Dumbledore and Grindelwald, and [two] the moment when they walk out of the graveyard with their arms around each other. Now the fact is that Hermione shares moments with Harry that Ron will never be able to participate in. He walked out. She shared something very intense with Harry. So I think it could have gone that way.

In conclusion, Harry and Hermione have excellent chemistry in the books, even better and stronger than in the movies. None of the movie scenes showed their chemistry with this intensity. Their romantic tension was much better in the books. Harry and Hermione have chemistry.

555 notes · View notes

corysmiles · 3 years

Note

The angst idea?

You know the one

Stone

————————

Friendly Giant AU

CW: MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH, angst, extremely brief mentions of blood/violence, mentions of depression(Also this can be treated as canon or not, if you want to believe a different ending that’s okay! )

Notes: sorry :) Also please read the whole content warning before going on, I hope you like it!

————————

Dead grass crumbled under Ranboo’s feet as he walked through the forest. The leaves from the tall pines around him shuddered and whistled under the frigid wind, but his thick fur kept him warm.

He’d go into hibernation soon, most likely in a few days, so he knew he had to make the trip then. He’d been avoiding it at all costs, but he needed to see it. At least before he went to sleep.

His breath clouded up in front of his eyes as his feet led him on the small dirt path to the graveyard. He’d been to the destination many times before…As his friends, his family, passed away they held the burials in the same place. It was a beautiful clearing he had to admit. But every time he went he could feel the dread building up in his stomach. The clearing took too much from him already, and it hurt to see the graves.

Only a few minutes into his trek, small blue and purple flowers started to pop up across the dirt. He recalled that Michael had planted the blue ones a few years after Wilbur had passed.

And the purple ones…they were added after Tubbo…

“They attract pillbees,” Michael had told him, when the pain was still fresh and his tears wouldn’t stop flowing, “He loved those.”

Ranboo felt a fresh wave of guilt crash into his heart as he realized he’d have to step through the flowers. The wild buds had completely covered the area, and while it was beautiful, to get to the the graves he would have to walk over them.

He hoped Michael wouldn’t mind too much if some of the flowers were flattened.

He winced as he felt more of the soft petals crunch under his feet, and out of the corner of his eye he saw a pair of pillbees fly past him.

“Sorry,” he whispered as the bees buzzed around his face, “I’ll be gone soon.”

He watched with amusement as one of the bugs curled up and plummeted through the air before catching itself and soaring upwards again. It’s small translucent wings glittered under the light like a tiny ball of fire.

Tubbo always loved watching them fly around.

Even near the end, when he could barely walk on his own he’d ask to see the pillbees, and Ranboo would bring him out without hesitation. Tubbo hated how helpless he felt, but Ranboo would do anything to help him.

Even as his vision failed and his memory started to falter, it always made him happy to feel their tiny bodies crawl over his hands. And he’d always smile so brightly when they fluttered around Ranboo’s face.

Ranboo wished he could see him smile like that again. Just once more, but there was nothing he could do. The closest he had to Tubbo’s face were the old chalk drawings Michael had made in the den.

And even they were starting to fade away from old age.

“Come on,” he whispered under his breath, he couldn’t put this off any more.

It wasn’t long before the graves came into view, and immediately he felt his whole body tense up. Memories of funerals and burials weighed down his heart.

The stones were all lined up in a perfect row. The farthest one on the left was already crumbling at the top, a sign of how long it had been there, while the newest one on the right sat pristine and fresh. There was still a bundle of flowers neatly tied up on top of it.

‘Probably from Michael’, his brain input.

As carefully as he could he knelt down in front of the stones and tried to keep his breathing steady. Every inhale felt like liquid fire running down his throat. And the sight of the newest grave made him feel nauseous.

He could do this. He had to.

“Hey,” he exhaled finally, “It’s been a while…”

The wind howled around his ears making them prick back from the icy cold. Tubbo always thought it was funny how his ears twitched, his mind reminded him.

“I’m sorry I didn’t come earlier. And that I missed the uh…that I missed the burial,” he choked after a few moments, “I’m so sorry Tubbo.”

Slowly, he wrapped his tail around the base of the stone- it was so so small. Even near the end Tubbo had never felt that small. He was so magnetic and larger than life, it hurt knowing he was deep under the dirt.

If he closed his eyes he could almost imagine it was still Tubbo, his husband and his best friend instead of a cold lifeless stone.

“You know Michael joined the guard,” he hummed, keeping his eyes trained down at the grave, “Sam convinced him to after you passed… He’s doing great; you’d be proud of him. But you probably already know that huh? He visits more than I do.”

Ranboo willed away the tears threatening to spill as his fingers found the human-sized ring in his pocket. It perfectly matched the ring still snug around his horn, even with it being worn down from how often Ranboo rubbed it between his fingers.

“Oh and they finally found it you know…Tommy’s badge. I know you spent a long time trying to find it,” he swallowed, “Some hunters found it in a cave. Whatever killed him must have spat it back up, and Michael has it now…It’s pretty beat up but he refuses to wear any other badge.”

The mention of Tommy’s death was like a stab to his heart. He couldn’t help it as tears slid down his face and wet the ground underneath him.

Tommy’s death was brutal…and the first time he’d felt loss. But it was also the first time he’d really seen Tubbo break.

It was a few years after Phil had already retired from the guard. It was supposed to be a normal roundtrip, the ones the guard did every night, but Tommy never came back.

Later that night Techno showed up at the walls alone and covered in blood. The entire town had watched as he fell into his father’s arms, not wanting to think about what it meant. Tubbo and Wilbur didn’t find out until later, when they got back from his den the next morning.

And Ranboo didn’t know until hours after.

That night the town held a funeral, but there was no body to bury. They’d set up his stone right next to his mother’s under the tree Phil had planted years before.

The tree Ranboo now sat in front of where one by one each of the humans he loved had been buried.

“Sam said I probably have ten more years yaknow,” Ranboo stuttered out as he grazed his claw against Tubbo’s gravestone, “I feel bad for leaving Michael but…I’m happy- I’ll get to see you all again. I miss you so much.”

“Michael isn’t in the den much anymore, and it feels so empty now that you’re not there Tubbo,” he broke, “I miss you so much. I don’t know what do with myself anymore.”

He was bordering on dangerous territory as his mind sped up. He knew he needed help, and that the way he coped wasn’t healthy but he missed Tubbo so much. Sam checked on him every few days, but often he just stared at the chalk drawings of his husband and cried until he fell back asleep.

“Most of the time I can’t even get up,” he admitted sadly, “I don’t want to move because it means you won’t be there. And I know you didn’t feel good near the end but…but I want you back so badly Tubs.”

He paused to wipe away a tear that dripped down onto Tubbo’s stone, “I know it’s selfish but I want you back so badly. I love you…You meant the world to me Tubbo. Meeting you was the best thing that ever happened to me.”

Ranboo let his head fall forward as tears streamed down his cheeks. It was unfair. He didn’t know why everyone got to pass on except for him. He wanted them back so badly.

He missed guard practices with Phil and Techno and sitting and watching Wilbur strum on his guitar. He missed Tommy running around with Michael and joking with him as he worked.

And he missed Tubbo most of all. He missed laying down with his best friend and sleeping curled up with him at night. He missed fishing while Tubbo sat on his head and told him stories. He missed Tubbo teaching Michael how to speak and draw until Michael was taller than Tubbo himself. And he missed the soft touches he received from the boy.

He missed everything about the only human who’d ever given him a chance.

With quivering lips he bent down and pressed a kiss to the cold stone. For a moment he swore it felt warm under his touch, and he could almost convince himself Tubbo was there with him.

“I love you Tubbo,” he whispered, “I’ll be back again.”

But only the wind whispered back.

The next day Ranboo went into hibernation for the first time without Tubbo, and when Michael arrived to check on him he found his father curled up around a pair of rings and a small clump of purple flowers.

#mcyt g/t #mcyt gt #angst #friendly giant au #major character death #cw major character death #g!ranboo #t!tubbo #corywrites

112 notes · View notes

incorrectlumityquotes · 3 years

Text

Why Amity fell for Luz: A Theory

Watching all the episodes of The Owl House and reviewing them brought back a lot of thoughts and feelings that I maybe forgot about. We all ship things and sometimes we do it for fun; sometimes for deeper reasons. I just started lumity because it reminded me of Diana & Akko from Little Witch Academia. I loved that show so much that I wanted more, and I thought it would be cool if Luz & Amity did something similar. I had no idea that it was going to go beyond that, so DAMN. To quote a talking science wolf, “For years we ask how, but we should ask why.” I mean, we saw how. But why? Well I can take a guess.

If we’re are going to start anywhere it’s going to be with the girl in question, Amity Blight.

As far as I know as of this typing, Amity Blight is a witchling from The Boiling Isles. She lives in Bonesboro at The Blight Manor estate with her parents and her siblings. She attends Hexside School of Magic and Demonics. Good for her.

Amity has an ambitious and competitive personality. She’s always striving to be better and be at the top of whatever she is doing. When she’s introduced in I Was a Teenage Abomination, she’s showing having great pride in being the top student in her abomination class. In Adventures in the Elements, she goes to The Knee in hopes of training to beat her siblings’ high score on the placement exam.

Amity also has a bit of a temper and gets annoyed easily. In I Was a Teenage Abomination, she sics her abominations on Willow and Luz just because she wasn’t named top student that day. In Enchanting Grom Fright, Amity snapped at the person she bumped into before realizing it was Luz. And later in the same episode, Amity beat up Hooty when he decided to get too close.

But she does have a soft sensitive side. She keeps a diary in her secret room in the library and even reads to kids in her free time. Amity also has a strong sense of integrity. She despises cheating (and cheaters) and feels guilt when she’s forced to break ties with Willow.

So why did someone like this fall for Luz of all people? (see above image)

Enter what I call my Shipping Theory of Compliments

The Shipping Theory of Compliments is that two characters would be shipped and sometimes canonically enter a romantic relationship based on their personalities complimenting each other and fulfilling elements they don’t have alone necessary to developing the character.

People like to use the image of a missing puzzle piece, but I don’t like that comparison because I think it’s a little inaccurate and I don’t like puzzles. Think of it more like the two pieces of the yin and yang coming together and then growing the circles of the opposite colors in them.

Something like that.

And it’s compliments, not opposites. When you think compliments, think more Star and Marco from Star vs the Forces of Evil. Star wants to go on a magical adventure. Marco also wants to go on a magic adventure. The difference is that Star goes in recklessly while Marco wants to plan it out a bit. They still have their adventure as oppose to Star’s opposite who wouldn’t want to go on a magical adventure. That sort of thing.

So how do Luz and Amity compliment each other?

Let’s start with that they have in common. Obvious stuff aside, they’re both training to become the best witches they can be. The difference comes that Luz is a human who has to learn magic via glyphs that she finds and Amity learns magic the “proper” way on The Boiling Isles.

Luz and Amity are also both fans of The Good Witch Azura book series. Difference is that Luz is more open about her fandom while Amity tries to keep it a secret. Also petty thing but they’re both fan artists too, but I think Luz might be a better than Amity. But hey, her crosshatching is improving.

Luz and Amity are also (at the start of the series) both lonely people. Luz’s mom says that she doesn’t have any friends, and Amity doesn’t like her “friends.” The difference is that Luz reaches outward to ease her loneliness (being social and friendly, trying new things, etc.) while Amity reaches inward (keeping a diary, staying busy, having a secret spot, etc.). They both also use escapist fiction to ease their loneliness.

That’s all well and good, but now we get into the real speculative parts.

...complimenting each other and fulfilling elements they don’t have alone necessary to developing the character.

When I was taking acting classes I was taught that the way you see people act is a persona based on their experiences on what it takes to survive and avoid physical, emotional and social death. So now we have to speculate based on what we were given on what emotional/social needs and wants has Amity not been getting before that she has with Luz.

First let me point you to another show called F is for Family. F is for Family is an adult animated sitcom on Netflix that follows a very dysfunctional family in the 1970s. These are legitimately bad characters, not in terms of being poorly written. What I’m saying is that these guys are assholes. But here’s where it gets interesting.

One of the characters is Kevin Murphy, the teenage son of the family. He’s a dim-witted wannabe rockstar who is always yelled at and put down by his parents throughout the entire series. However in season four Kevin meets Alice. Alice teaches Kevin that his favorite band is a big reference to Tolkien and gives him a copy of The Hobbit. They bond over their love of Lord of the Rings and get along really well. Alice calls him smart for being able to read all of Lord of the Rings over a few days and never puts him down. Even in the one time they did fight she never yelled at him or raised her voice which he found weird because he’s so used to being yelled at. Alice gave Kevin the emotional support he always wanted but never got from his family.

Using that as a backdrop, let’s go back to Amity.

Amity grew up with her parents making her do things she didn’t want to do, making choices for her. Amity wanted to be one way. Her parents wanted something else. Amity’s mother even dyes Amity’s hair green so it matches her siblings. Amity wanted to be friends with Willow. Amity’s parents wanted her to be friends with the mean kids. While Amity does work hard to be the best at what she’s doing, her parents also put pressure on her to make sure that she is at that level.

Her siblings are another bag of awful. They constantly refer to her by an annoying nickname that I’m guessing has an embarrassing moment attached to it. They seem to live by a double standard that Amity despises. She has to work hard and follow the rules just to be accepted while they are naturally talented and break the rules with everyone still thinking that they’re perfect.

Family is supposed to provide unconditional love except it looks like the love of the Blights is based on conditions. Nobody just likes Amity for who she is. She doesn’t have a friend.

Enter: the friendliest person she’s ever met

Amity has to struggle and work for the simplest things, even affection. Except when it comes to Luz. Luz is naturally friendly and positive. Amity doesn’t have to earn her kindness. Even when she’s bullied Luz before, Luz is always coming back with a smile. I suppose when you live life surrounded by jerks, you’ll want to hang out with the one person who’s always nice to you. Sort of.

Yes, Amity did think Luz was a bully for constantly getting her into trouble. But even at Covention and Lost in Language, Luz kept reaching out to her. This combined with Amity’s awareness of her own behavior is what convinced her to try to reach out in kind to Luz by the end of Lost in Language. “She’s trying to be nice to me, so I should try too,” I’m guessing is the mindset especially in Adventures in the Elements. And then...Luz continued to be nice to her which is kind of a big deal for Amity.

Let’s tally up what we have so far:

Luz and Amity have similar interests (The Good Witch Azura series, art, fiction, learning magic)

Luz and Amity have similar values (work ethic, disdain for cheating, protecting those closest to you, etc.)

Luz gives Amity the positivity and affection that Amity doesn’t normally get anywhere else

They still have differing personalities with Amity being more competitive and Luz having more of a live-and-let-live attitude.

Even with all these things in mind, why was Amity so scared to ask Luz to Grom?

Speculating again but my theory is that Amity wasn’t sure if Luz actually liked her or if Luz is just friendly because that’s how Luz is. Amity was scared of being rejected because she felt that maybe she was just reading the situation wrong. Luz is this ray of sunshine in her gray skies (if you’ll forgive the cliché). People like Amity always think of all the worst possibilities (I know because I do this too). Amity was probably thinking a bunch of what ifs. “What if Luz doesn’t actually like me? What if she’s just being friendly because she feels sorry for me? What if she has feelings for someone else? What if she never actually liked me? What if she’s straight?”

Luz is Amity’s first crush and it is scary as all hell to put yourself out there like that for the first time. She wasn’t expecting to get married at Grom night. She just wanted to dance with the girl she liked.

The dance at Grom was like confirmation for her that it could happen. Amity didn’t have to ask out Luz because Luz asked her. Being with Luz isn’t a pipedream. It’s a definite possibility. And we all know how she reacted to that idea.

Uh...she’ll be in her bunk.

While Luz and Amity aren’t together as of this typing, I believe it’s bound to happen. Until then, after The Lumity Trilogy, Amity knows that Luz is the girl she likes.

tl;dr version

Amity fell for Luz because they have similar interests and values, their personalities differ in a compatible way and Luz provides Amity emotional needs and wants that she doesn’t get anywhere else.

Also, round eared girl pretty.

Thanks everyone for reading.

#my thoughts #lumity #meta #analysis

237 notes · View notes

apocalypseornaw · 3 years

Text

One Condition

For the square "Friends to lovers" on @girl-next-door-writes make me feel bingo

Side note Bobby is alive in this cause screw canon

No real warnings besides cursing and lots of fluff

First meeting

You had just thrown your bags into the trunk of your nova when your cell phone started ringing. You cursed under your breath and ran to the front seat to grab it. You barely glanced at the screen but recognized the number instantly.

You answered with a smile on your face “Bobby! How are you doing?” You could hear other voices in the background but that wasn’t exactly an uncommon occurrence.

Bobby was pretty much one of the few people that tried to coordinate the efforts of hunters and offered a place to crash and or get patched up to those he was close with. “As good as I ever am sweetheart. Look I got some boys here that are hunting a witch and since you’re a bit more attuned with that type of thing from everything your uncle taught you I was wondering if you could lend them a hand” You didn’t even think about it before you said “Of course. I’m about three hours from you but I’ll head that way” if Bobby was asking you to work with them they could be trusted. You heard him call someone in the background an idjit before he told you to drive safe and hung up.

------

“You think this chick can handle a witch better than me and Sam Bobby?” Dean was a bit skeptical about Bobby calling in another hunter to back them up. “Son, her uncle raised her and he was a witch. She didn’t pick up a lot from him but she knows enough to spot the signs and had a few defensive maneuvers up her sleeve. Give her a chance, I’ve known her for years and she’s just as good a hunter as either of you”

The sound of an engine pulling up drew their attention. Sam stepped around the corner from the kitchen with a bottle of water in his hand and motioned to the door “That her?” Bobby tilted his head slightly and listened for a moment before nodding “Yeah that’s her nova”

Dean and Sam both followed Bobby out to the porch. You parked just behind the impala and killed your engine before climbing out your car. Bobby walked down the steps to greet you and a smile slipped onto your face the moment you saw him “Bobby!” you hugged him and he did his usual checklist to ensure your last hunt was successful and you hadn’t had no recent injuries before finally turning his attention back to the two standing on the porch watching the two of you greet each other “These the boys I told you about” he started so Sam of course stepped up first and extended his hand “I’m Sam. That’s my older brother Dean” you shook Sam’s hand with a smile “Name’s Y/N”

Dean nodded at you but you could see how skeptic he was about working with you. “Hold on..Sam and Dean? John’s sons” Dean nodded again so you turned back to Bobby not meaning to talk about the Winchesters in front of them but needing to ask “I thought they didn’t really work with other hunters? Did they change their policy since their dad died?”

Dean cleared his throat so you looked back at him. He gave you a smile that was much more sarcasm than friendly “Sweetheart we can answer questions for ourselves.” You laughed sharply before replying “My name isn’t sweetheart darling and I was just making sure the two of you had worked up to the point of playing well with others. I see your brother has manners but from where I’m standing I ain’t too impressed with yours”

You brushed past Dean into the house so he begrudgingly followed you. Bobby whispered to Sam “Either they’ll work well together or the witch will be distracted enough by their fighting you should be able to kill her easy enough”

Friends?

“Can I ask you one thing sweetheart” Dean spoke from the other side of the motel room and you cut your eyes up with a raised eyebrow “What?” He motioned to where you were currently painting your nails “I mean what I’m about to say in the least offensive way possible”

“Not a good way to start a conversation with a woman who is armed and can kick your ass but do please continue” you replied and he laughed before holding his hands up defensively “It’s just..you’re a hunter and one of the best I know. You’re pretty badass in my opinion but you always have your nails painted and yeah it’s normally a dark color but I was just curious as to why”

You let a sly grin slip onto your face as you closed the nail polish and placed it back into your bag “It comes in handy” “How so?” he asked so you shot him a wink “You’ll see”

------

Later that night you and the boys headed back to the motel to catch a little sleep before parting ways the next morning. Dean stopped you just outside your room door “C’mon Y/N tell me how you knew who the shifter was” you stopped and leaned back against the doorframe glancing over where Sam was watching you and his older brother with an amused smile.

You held up one hand and wiggled your fingers. Dean looked confused for a moment then realization flashed across his face “Does your nail polish have silver in it?” You grinned “Silver infused basecoat and that my dear is why my nails are always painted”

He nodded approvingly “Smart and yet again proves my point of why you’re one of the best hunters I know” you touched the tender spot on your side when the shifter had thrown you into a wall and probably would’ve went for a killing blow had Dean not been there “You’re not so bad yourself Dean, in fact I would say you’ve finally learned how to play well with others” Sam laughed but Dean simply grinned “Only took a few years of knowing you huh?”

“What can I say? I’m a miracle worker even with seemingly lost causes” he shook his head with a light laugh “Goodnight Y/N” “Night Dean,Night Sam” after Sam wished you a goodnight you walked into your room and shut the door behind yourself. Who would’ve thought all those years before when you first met the brothers that they’d end up being your two closest friends?

Maybe more?

Dean stopped in his tracks when he walked into Bobby’s living room and saw you curled up on the couch fast asleep. You had grabbed his discarded jacket from the arm of the couch and was using it as a pillow. A small smile slipped onto his face at seeing you were finally resting so he grabbed one of the blankets Bobby kept in the hall closet to spread across your legs. You moved slightly in your sleep and for just a moment he worried he may have woken you up but you were simply burrowing further into his jacket and the blanket.

He walked quietly back into the kitchen and sat down at the table across from Bobby “She doing ok?” Bobby asked, nodding back towards you. “Yeah she’s finally asleep. I’ve been worried about her these last few days” in truth you had done something incredibly stupid while also simultaneously brave.

You, him and Sam had gone up against a coven and you’d taken the brunt of a spell protecting him without even knowing what the spell could do. He had felt an ice cold jolt of fear when you’d gone down. He was afraid when he made it to your side that you’d be gone. Thankfully you were stronger than given credit by the witches. They’d gotten you into the impala and Dean hadn’t come under ninety getting you to Bobby’s.

Bobby being well Bobby had an antidote waiting but apparently it’d take a few days to get your system back right after the shock of the spell. The last week and a half you’d gone through shivering spells hard enough you’d cracked a tooth only to spike a fever the next moment.

You hadn’t kept much to eat down and sleep had been out of the question completely. You’d been in and out of it and Dean hadn’t left your side for a second even refusing to go into town if anything was needed. That’s where Sam currently was.

“You care about her don’t you?” Bobby asked, forcing Dean out of his thoughts about you. “What? Of course I do, she’s my friend” Bobby sighed in frustration with the younger man who was like a son to him and just as stubborn “Dean that’s not what I meant” that made Dean really stop to consider what Bobby was saying. Did he have romantic feelings for you?

When was the last time he’d sought another woman? It just seemed natural to spend time with you after a hunt or just crash. When he needed to talk to someone he’d call you if the two of you weren’t around each other. He always looked forward to seeing a smile on your face and when it was because of him? There wasn’t a better feeling. You’d become such an important part of his life over the years he hadn’t even realized it.

When you’d gotten hurt this time and he faced the very real possibility of losing you it had just confirmed what he’d already known deep down. You were who he wanted in his life. You were the most amazing woman he’d ever met, you kept him on his toes and made him strive to be a better man every day although you never missed an opportunity to tell him just how good of a man he already was. “Bobby..” he started but was silenced with a look “Don’t tell me son. Save it for when Y/N wakes up then you two need to have a talk”

------

When you slowly started to wake up you felt like you’d been hit by a bus. Christ what had happened? Everything was a little foggy. You caught a whiff of gunpowder,leather and cinnamon and memories started flooding back. Dean. That damn witch had thrown a spell at him!

You sat up quickly only for a wave of dizziness to push you back down. You then realized your pillow had in fact been Dean’s jacket. Where was he? Was he ok? “Dean?” you called weakly calming slighty when you recognized your surroundings as Bobby’s living room.

You heard footsteps and looked up to see him walking into the room with a worried smile “You’re awake” you nodded slowly being careful to not cause another wave to push you back under and started to sit up much more carefully this time. He stepped forward to help you then sat down next to you so you leaned your head over on his shoulder with your legs curled up under you while you turned to face him on the couch.

“Are you ok?” you asked, voice slightly muffled due to the fact that your face was buried in his shirt. He laughed slightly which caused you to pull back enough to look at him “Why are you laughing at me?” he raised one hand to gently cup the side of your face “You’re asking if I’m ok while you’ve spent the last week and a half going through everything this side of torture because you decided it was best to shove me out the way and take that blast for yourself” you grimaced slightly “Well at least we’re both alive”

You realized he was still holding your face and probably would’ve been embarrassed had you not been fighting the urge to curl up against his chest and go back to sleep. “Why?” he asked and you were confused for a moment before you realized he was asking why you’d saved him. “Because whether you believe it or not Dean you’re worth saving time and again” he smiled slightly and opened his mouth to talk but you raised a hand before he could “Wait let me get this out while you feel bad and may not make fun of me later if it backfires I can blame it on the after effects”

You might as well confess your feelings now considering you’d nearly died for him. When he nodded you took a deep breath then said “Dean I’ve had feelings for you for a while. I couldn’t very well just let you die. It was worth the risk” “Can I speak now?” he asked with a slight smile so you nodded. He leaned forward to press a gentle kiss to your forehead before saying “I feel the same way about you. When you’re better I want to take you on an actual date, ya know actually romance you but for now thank you and please don’t ever scare me like that again”

You smiled slightly then said “On one condition” “Which is?” he asked so you motioned to his chest “Can I go back to sleep on you?” He laughed and pulled you into his lap “For as long as you want”

@girl-next-door-writes

#spn fanfiction #supernatural fanfiction #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester x female!reader #girl next doors make me feel bingo

99 notes · View notes

novelconcepts · 3 years

Note

omg can you do a print of damie in canon just interacting with flora bc i would love that

She’s lost Flora.

There is, Dani thinks with the forced calm of one already beginning to spiral, little cause to panic. The house is big, but it’s not that big--and Flora is a good kid. She’s not exactly prone to just wandering off. She certainly wouldn’t, say, vanish from sight and reappear somewhere unexpected, suddenly acting like she didn’t entirely remember the time in between.

That doesn’t sound like Flora at all.

She isn’t running, per se, from room to room. Running would suggest there is a problem to be handled, and if she starts thinking along those lines--if she starts obsessing about Flora’s distinctly off-putting way of gazing over her shoulder, of saying things just a little too odd to be hand-waved away, of looking at Dani as though she can see straight through her to the unease thrumming under the surface--well. That way lies nothing useful. Nothing at all.

“Have you seen Flora?” The kitchen had seemed a good bet. Here, after all, is Owen, puttering away over the ingredients for the evening’s meal, his mood somber as he uses the manor to avoid reflecting on his mother’s upcoming funeral. Here is Hannah, dutifully rearranging the china, pretending not to steal glances at Owen’s lanky frame every few seconds. That spot at the table is made for Flora, little legs hanging off the chair, brimming with questions--

But Flora isn’t there, and Owen is shaking his head.

“Not since lunch. Lost her, have you?”

No, she almost snaps. A count of three, a long-held breath; she smiles tightly, reminding herself that this is not Owen’s fault, nor Owen’s job. The children will be your responsibility alone, after all.

“She’s quick,” she says instead. Hannah purses her lips.

“Perhaps upstairs with Miles?”

She isn’t. Miles, bent over a book with a solemn expression, blinks up at her as though she’s dragged him by the shirt collar out of the actual wardrobe to Narnia.

“She asked me to color--what time is it?”

“Two,” Dani says, sparing the briefest glance for her watch. He shrugs.

“An hour ago, I think? I told her to ask Hannah.” A flash of concern crosses his face, a too-adult creasing of brow. “Was that wrong? I just wanted to finish my book--”

“It’s fine,” Dani assures him, ruffling his hair. Too-adult, his expression may be, but this is the most kid she’s seen Miles in days. The last thing she wants is to dissuade him from reading, or from the loose sprawl of his posture.

An hour, though. In the days since coming to Bly, Dani can’t remember twenty minutes passing without Flora turning up underfoot.

Outside, she thinks with another swell of barely-restrained panic. She’s outside. By the lake, probably, where Flora can so often be found keeping company with dolls and talismans and snatches of ethereal song.

It isn’t exactly a reassuring thought, particularly with summer rain sluicing down the windows, scattering over the roof like pellets. A storm, it isn’t, but an eight-year-old girl has no business wandering in weather like this.

You'd have loved it, at her age, Dani reminds herself. There’s nothing at all wrong with a little girl puddle-jumping for the sheer joy of it. Flora probably got bored, cooped up with a bunch of busy adults and her brother uninterested in playing games. She’s fine. She’s almost certainly fine.

An umbrella is waiting beside the door, still damp from Owen’s trip in before breakfast. Dani takes a breath, pops it open, steels herself for the brisk wind.

The grounds are gray, the puddles turning the grass to a squelchy mess beneath her shoes. She keeps her head up, her eyes carefully turned away from the puddles which sit like recklessly-dropped mirrors at every turn; if she so much as glances down and spots a flash of glasses, she’s not sure she’ll be able to keep her composure.

Flora is not by the lake, as it turns out. Nor the statue gardens. Nor the rose bushes. Flora is nowhere, she’s starting to think, and her mind is finally turning toward the worst--toward the depth of that lake, how easily a small girl might slip off the embankment and tumble headlong into its hungry waves without notice--when she remembers the greenhouse.

Jamie will help. The thought rises without warning, a solid patch of sunlight at the center of the storm. Jamie will help--because Jamie knows every corner of these grounds as well as her own hands. Jamie, who maybe doesn’t know Dani all that well, but didn’t seem to mind offering gentle reassurance, exchanging unexpectedly deep conversation on the couch...or Dani taking her hand in the dark. Jamie, who had said, Who the hell knew? Jamie, who had worn an expression a little like awe.

They haven’t had time to talk about it since, but even so. Even so, for Flora, Jamie is sure to--

She hesitates at the door, fist raised to knock. It feels foolish, rapping on the entry to a greenhouse like it’s Jamie’s own bedroom--but this is, she reasons, as close to Jamie’s home as she’s ever likely to get.

“Jamie, are you...”

“Here,” her voice comes from somewhere just out of sight. Dani takes a cautious step in out of the rain, jostling the umbrella and pulling it hastily shut. Best not to invite bad luck--she’s certainly already had her share.

“I’m looking for Flora,” she calls, feeling a bit silly. There’s so much going on in this room--plants and tables, pots and a variety of outdoor furniture draped with old blankets. Normally, Jamie is easy to spot amid the riot of greens and pinks, her hands busy coaxing seedlings to life. Today, Dani feels as though she’s tripped and fallen into a game of hide and seek.

“Don’t have to look far,” Jamie’s voice comes again--from behind the sofa, Dani thinks. “C’mere.”

“Miss Clayton!” Flora pipes up, and Dani feels the tension leave her body in a violent rush. Her hand grips the nearest table for support, her eyes closing in relief. “Come color with us”

“Come--sorry?” She can’t have heard right. Jamie? Jamie the gardener, putting aside work and temper to waste an afternoon on crayons?

Yes--yes, that appears to be exactly what Jamie is doing. Sprawled on her stomach, still dressed in her coveralls, she’s got a blue crayon in hand and a green one tucked behind her ear. She glances up as Dani steps nearer, a smile lighting her face.

“Kid came stumbling in out of the rain an hour ago. Expect she didn’t think to warn you in advance?”

“Sorry.” Flora offers a sheepish smile, sitting up quickly. “Are you very cross?”

“No, of course not.” Just going to need a minute to purge the image of finding you facedown in the goddamned lake, is all. “Next time, though, you’ll have to tell me you’re leaving the house alone. I need to know where you are at all times, Flora.”

She expects Jamie to scoff at this--to say, Ah, she was with me, she’s fine. Instead, Jamie stretches over to land a sharp flick on Flora’s upper arm.

“Rude to make Poppins worry. Look, she’s gone all pink.” She looks up at Dani, grinning. “Not a bad look, if we’re in the market for honesty.”

Dani suspects pink is the lightest shade she can manage, with Jamie gazing at her that way. It’s too easy, all of a sudden, to remember an unexpectedly soft hand under her own fingers, Jamie turning reflexively at the wrist to hold her back.

“I’m terribly sorry,” Flora says, a phrase Dani is starting to think is more Flora than even perfectly splendid. “Here--I was just about to do one of you!”

Jamie gestures with the blue crayon, a silent suggestion for Dani to sit beside her. “Might as well. Rain doesn’t look like it’s letting up anytime soon.” She lowers her voice, eyes fixed on Flora’s determined rummage through the crayon box. “Sorry about that, Poppins. Know she’s been unpredictable lately, didn’t like the idea of her stumping around in the cold. If I’d known you were worried--”

“It’s all right.” In truth, she’s glad Flora made her way out here. Growing more pleased by the moment with this development, really, as Jamie slides a blank sheet of paper in front of her and presses a purple crayon into her hand.

“Join us. We’re doing portraiture.”

“I can see that,” Dani laughs. Jamie’s handiwork speaks of a distinct lack of care for detail--each sketch on her page is, at best, a stick figure with a single defining feature. “How does Owen hold up his head, carrying a mustache the size of his torso?”

“With minimal decorum,” Jamie says, grinning. “And she’s right, it’s your turn.”

Dani suspects she’s going less pink, more a volatile shade of maroon, with both parties squinting at her face, their papers, her face again. Flora is doing her very best work, taking several minutes just to select the closest shades of blue, yellow, pink. Jamie makes an enormous production of holding up a crayon, closing one eye, gauging proportions--and then, cheerfully, scrawling a figure identical to the other four already on the page.

“I’m taller than Hannah?” Dani asks, unable to resist a giggle. Jamie frowns.

“Ah, you’re...standin’ on a crate.” She adds a box beneath Dani’s non-existent feet with a flourish, nodding. “There. It’s symbolic.”

“Of what?”

“I’ve ranked you all on how much I like you. Takin’ into account, of course, certain accusations pointed my way regarding mud and shiny floorboards.” Jamie winks. Dani finds herself gripping her crayon almost hard enough to hurt.

“You’re not drawing, Miss Clayton!” Flora observes. Dani glances away from Jamie’s smile--a difficult act only a few days ago, nearly impossible now--and clears her throat.

“Well. Maybe just until the rain stops.”

There are, she thinks as a comfortable quiet settles over the greenhouse, infinitely worse ways to spend her afternoon.

#fanfiction #ficlet #the haunting of bly manor #dani x jamie #flora wingrave #soft prompts #hope this is about what you were looking for #soft it certainly is

70 notes · View notes

yozzers · 3 years

Text

vexos hcs and random notes

ill update as i go, because yes i do update my masterlists every once in awhile, i should probably add them to my pinned...

General

I sincerely hope they have a small living arrangement so I can inflict them with the pain of having to share almost everything with each other

I just want Shadow and Lync to share a bunk

Like to think that alongside Volt, Mylene and Lync were also recruited by Hydron

None of them officially joined until they were a bit older but probably trained to eventually join the Vexos; in the mean time they probably worked for Hydron or something like that

Volt recruited at 11; Lync a year later and Mylene following not long after (respectively 13, 8, 12 when they’re all gathered)

My reasoning to why Volt is patient with Lync’s antics and Mylene less so but doesn’t lash out as badly as you think she would around annoying little kids; grew up tgt moment

Spectra probably forced his way into the Vexos like “hiiii i see you dont have any Vexos members <3″ bcs obv he wasn’t using royal scientist dad privelages (i think, bcs Clay seems horrified abt Spectra being a Vexos and well, being Spectra)

Shadow had an advantage of being a nobleman (in terms of him being accepted into the Vexos’ ranks)

the Vexos and their set of rules magent-ed on the fridge door or something and every time they go over a page they have to staple/tape a new page on

Joined in this order, Volt, Spectra, Shadow, Mylene, Lync, Gus

Vexos being a “chance of death low but the chance is still there” type of job... they feel like idols girl help they are bakugan idol group who work for the government

sorry the way the vestal kids talk about them... going to treat the Vexos like a kpop group now

Spectra Phantom / Keith Fermin

[canon] son of a (royal?) scientist. definitely had it good and comfy

think it’d be REALLY funny if he already knew Shadow before he became Spectra, Shadow just doesn’t recognize him bcs of his stupid get up

throws childhood friends Shadow Spectra at you, just two weirdos

Keith specifically keeps Shadow from ever meeting his sister which is why neither of them really recognize each other

Pre-Spectra; probably would’ve been really into bakugan biology and what not. Feels like the kind of person to talk w/ his dad about “do you think we could change their appearance if we messed w/ their mechanical ball form or would it not carry over to their released forms”

this mf looks like a biology major i feel it in my guts

mom isn’t dead she just divorced Clay bcs he didn’t know how to balance family and work, good for her

probably lives in another city now, and it’s a bit more of a hassle to meet with her kids so they don’t see her as much but she is present in their lives (keep in contact in other ways)

probably went a bit silent when Keith went missing

didn’t bleach his eyebrows bcs he didn’t want to harm the skin around there and he never thought he’d take the mask off around others, or about how stupid he’d look without the mask

please please please please draw him with his pink hair roots in his MS fit he should've grown out some of his bleached hair by then

daddy issues is truly the root of evil

Gus Grav

Just Some Gut background; middle class just living life

[canon?] was going on a route to being an “idol brawler”, because that’s kind of what their brawls felt like, since it was all purely for show with some competition. it felt less like a sport and more spectacle.

Gus wanting to be an idol brawler is actually such a funny string of words put together I’m making that a thing, if he didn’t join the Vexos he would’ve been an idol brawler

I like the Gus needs glasses hc (shoutout to @marmeladebois ‘s post on that)

The hc of him being half human and Runo’s half brother is so good

Cooks well but refuses to help cook fr the Vexos (unless Spectra specifically asks) --> that job is usually left to Volt

not related but reminds me heavily of yugioh vrain’s Spectre (or other way around... Gus was the blueprint)

Shadow Prove

[handbook canon] a vestal nobleman

has an older brother (oc; Lux- casual Haos brawler)

inferiority complex or whatever, the only thing he bested his brother in was Bakugan

the Prove family being typical prim proper noble family and forcing Shadow to be repressed is something, but the Proves having the same kind of wavelength as Shadow but in different variations is funnier. They’re just Like That.

Probably not a military family, does work closely with the government still; um im thinking somewhere under the Fermins but not by much

Considered running away from home several times

Unwillingly has knowledge on Vestal classic literature/ music

hard clutching a wall whenever he wants to join in on discussions about it bcs he knows this stuff but no way is he going to make himself look like a nerd + hes not actually that interested

*debates you for fun and bcs i hate u <3*

You know how he doesn’t take his job as a Vexos member super seriously, I wonder:

did his parents force him to be a Vexos since he wasn’t interested in the political side of his family and probably against taking up anything related to it, so they had him do something that’d still be beneficial to the family?

joined to pursue a freedom he didn’t have as a nobleman and is now just taking it really easy?

has clowns > jesters debate with volt; obv he’s team clown, volt is team jester

incredibly irrelevant but if he was a human he’d be chinese, i’ve claimed him, prodigal son older brother and fail son dynamic is there

Mylene Ferrow

While I like the idea of her being from a military family, I want to make her like Ling Wen (TGCF) in the sense she started from the bottom and climbed to the top... it fits her ambitious nature of grasping for more, she hasn’t reached what she considers the top just yet...

[very Ling Wen specific but Mylene being put in jail fr crimes unknown to me and being recruited by Hydron bcs she kicked serious ass is an entertaining thought]

I like to think she’s closest to Shadow due to the fact he kind of forces his presence onto her so... not her choice in that matter. “annoying” to “endearingly annoying, you still aren’t getting special treatment though”

Ofc Volt and Lync are on the same level, but I think they all know when to give each other space so they’re more of a “we hold each other at a distance, but we’re aware of out closeness which is enough for us”

Then its Spectra and then Gus in the “closest to Mylene” scale; she just straight up hates Gus and it’s mutual

whoever made the “Mylene and Spectra were exes” hc I think it’s really funny so I’m adding it here

terrible fashion, she’s the one who chose the outfits when she and Shadow went to earth; her fashionable armor look she usually has was designed with Volt’s help, she just voiced what she generally wanted

Her red lipstick look was bcs she thought it’d make her look more serious/ intimidating (Volt and Lync approved, it rlly does work on her)

Shadow matches w/ her (via his red nails) after they get teamed up tgt several times bcs he thinks they’re basically the go-to duo matchup whenever they’re assigned work n it’d be cool

Very forthcoming about the fact she used to be considered a criminal and was from same rundown area Volt and Lync come from

She’s grateful she got out of jail but she still has no respect for Hydron and despite how much she tries to hide it she does make it pretty clear to him she doesn’t really like him

I wish I had more to say about her... but It’s all relationship esque, i think in general she’s enjoyable and good so what I want more out of her is character dynamics

Lync Volan

[eng dub] he has grandparents; whether they’re still alive or not is...?

was part of the same area Volt is from

probably aware of each other but didn’t really know each other

you sound like you have mommy issues

came from the same area as Volt, but lived further out and closer to those areas where there were some bits of nature left

ill expand on why he got picked up by Hydron another day lazy rn

Volt Luster

[canon] he’s from an area that just straight up looks like yugioh 5ds’ Satellite, and Hydron was the one who pulled him out of there

He says Hydron pulled him out of there when he was a kid? I’d assume at youngest it’d be like Hydron (8) and Volt (11)

has a neat collection of handmade jester dolls

lot more artistic than he seems

Had his guardian bakugan with him the longest; had Brontes even before he met Hydron

Would the others consider him weird fr having a talking Bakugan that acted friendly with him n cracked jokes?

#bakugan #croak

27 notes · View notes

ichika27 · 2 years

Text

My Thoughts on Carry On

I usually only make posts like this for anime but I have some thoughts after reading the book. I’m aware there are other covers but this was the cover of the one I bought. So yeah...

I’ll be doing this the same way as I make the anime posts. No pictures though cause it’s a novel.

Story:

Simon Snow is the chosen one of the magical world according to the prophecy. This is his final year at Watford School of Magicks where he has to deal with the complicated things in his life: his girlfriend Agatha, his roommate and enemy Baz, and their enemy the Insidious Humdrum. On top of it all, he has to think of his future after Watford.

Characters:

Simon Snow - an orphan who was admitted to Watford School of Magicks as a child who is said to be the Chosen One and is now also the Mage’s Heir.

Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch - Also knowns as Baz. He’s Simon’s roommate and rival/enemy and the son of a powerful magical family. He’s also a secretly a vampire and Simon has been trying to prove this for a long time.

Penelope Bunce - A smart and capable magician and is Simon’s best friend. She takes studying seriously but would do anything when it comes to helping Simon.

Agatha Wellbelove - Simon’s girlfriend whose having doubts about the things going on in her life. She prefers the life of a Normal better and is starting to question her role in the events of the story.

The Mage - The school’s headmaster, an important figure in their world, and the closest to a parental figure Simon has. He was the one who found and brought Simon to Watford.

There are other characters but it feels like they’d be spoilers if I had to describe them.

Thoughts:

I liked it a lot. The book was fun to read although it felt kinda slow at the beginning before it started to get exciting (the murder mystery needed to be solved got me). The book is one of those that switches POVs and it was fun reading the thoughts of other characters and not just our protagonist’s.

Okay, so the story felt like a fanfic of a series that doesn’t exist and I don’t mean that in a bad way. I know people usually say that as an insult but as a fic reader and writer, I can’t do the same so I’m not saying it in a bad way. It just feels like the way the first couple of chapters were written the way canon divergent AUs are made - those fics that follow the events of canon but deviate one way or another. Their beginning is like how the beginning of this book is: lore dump for people who need to catch up on how we got to the events of the story, the “here’s what you missed!” stuff. Plus the focus on character’s thoughts and emotions on the things that happened and are happening in their lives reminds me of character-centric fics. I love it! It made me like the characters even more and care about them despite the main story being like, the finale of an entire series we barely got to know.

I know this story is sort of like supposed to be a “Harry Potter” parody for the book “Fangirl” (which I have read before) so that the MC of that could have a fandom to fangirl over which the audience could relate to but Carry On is more than just that now. It’s no longer a parody and is not a rip-off but it felt like the author’s own take on the “chosen one at magic school” story. If that’s confusing then I’d liken it to the modern isekai genre - many creators decided to make their own version using what the main components of such stories have and put their own spin on it. Like, I can somewhat pinpoint some story/character information that Carry On has in similar to HP but it’s not entirely the same. It was like a familiar mold but so many other different things were put in it that they are their own selves. It’s pretty cool, really.

The way their magic works seem simple and kinda weird at first but the explanation made it make sense in the story.

I like how the story progressed and even the ending but I was left with many questions that probably got answered in the sequel books. Still though, it would’ve been confusing had I read this before when those sequels didn’t exist. Like, I’m wondering if Simon would ever know the truth about his parents or what the heck happened to Nicodemus (he was important enough to get his own POV chapter and then he isn’t mentioned in the end) among other things. I’d have to get the sequels someday.

Spoiler Stuff and Random Whatevers:

Character Thoughts-

-> Some short ones: I liked Penny and how much she cares about her friends and that she’s also a rule-breaker if she wanted to be. Agatha was interesting as a character who is like this person stuck in a story they didn’t want to be in. I was happy for Agatha in the end.

-> I found Simon to be kind of annoying at first lol. Simon is kinda the opposite of Agatha (as he’s like the character who was placed into a story he thinks he needs to be in cause those around him made him feel like it’s all he’s got) but it can’t be helped. He had nothing and still questions his origins and then many of the things he does love which make him happy are at Watford.

He’s at Watford and the world of magic as a chosen one and the Mage who he respects and think of as an important adult in his life has expectations of him as the chosen one. It makes sense many of his actions and thoughts connect to this - being with Agatha and the happy ever after he wants after the chosen one duties are done because that’s how it goes, right? And there’s his obsession with defeating (or at least exposing) Baz cause he’s the hero and Baz the obviously antagonistic (to him) vampire is the enemy.

-> My favorite character in the book is Baz. I thought he’d be a brooding, arrogant, jerk but then his POV chapters came in and he’s actually a pretty fun guy (still a kind of a jerk though lol). I love his thoughts and commentary on the things that happened and are happening. He’s in love with Simon despite them being enemies so he wasn’t trying to hurt him really bad but if asked if he was, he’d say “Fuck yeah!” cause he still has a reputation and he does enjoy pissing off Simon lol. His entrance to school at the beginning made me laugh too - it was a waste of magic but he looked cool and that’s what’s important.

One of the other things I liked is that he wasn’t the one who didn’t know what their plan is. Usually in a fight between the protag and the enemy, the enemy is the one who has to think of what would be next after their plan succeeds. But here, Baz knows or at least have plans of what to do for the future and it’s Simon whose confused about what then after doing his chosen one duties.

He’s also like Simon, I guess. He believed in his own role in the story: he’s Simon’s enemy and one day they’re gonna be fighting seriously and one is probably gonna die (and he believed and held onto the idea that it would be himself who dies). But even still, like I said, it seems he’s got plans for what if that doesn’t happen which I think is nice.

-> The Mage is a complicated and confusing character to think about. He had points and good ideas but he strayed badly due to his ambition. It sucks cause many of his intentions definitely would benefit many and had given so many others a chance but the way he did everything is definitely not good.

I like the twist about him and Simon though. The story is still about the chosen one but the Mage created his own for it. So, I wonder: did the prophecy mean Simon and it knew the Mage would create the chosen or is there someone else out there but it’s just never found out who?

-> Ebb was an interesting character so it’s too bad there’s not much of her own POV. I wish it was shown what happened in between her being taken away and the final battle. I wonder how her brother is and what he did after her death?

-> Baz’s aunt Fiona is cool. Despite being his aunt, she seemed more like an older sibling to him in the story.

The Romance-

It was cute lol. Especially in the Baz POVs. Just, I wish their first kiss went differently. It would’ve been better if Baz was the one to kiss Simon first and not the other way around. Don’t get me wrong, it was still cute and I still squeed over it but the progress just bothered me, I guess?

Simon has been hung up on Agatha and what his feelings for her must be in almost the entire book so it felt weird that kissing Baz at all would even cross his mind. Especially since he has been and sort of still a bit suspecting Baz of being evil (and Baz doesn’t want to prove it otherwise). Meanwhile, Baz’s feeling for him had been revealed already and his thoughts on Simon are shown on his POVs. I wish Baz kissed Simon instead - he already thought it will be the end as he didn’t want to go on but he still wants to believe they were enemies. What better time to kiss Simon, right? He’d get his kiss and confuse Simon as he ends it all. It felt like it would’ve made more sense if Simon would think of Baz differently after this event and their relationship would slowly change after when Simon slowly accepts they could be something else other than enemies.

But like I said, I don’t hate what happened in canon. It just felt like it suddenly went there too fast.

Other Stuff-

I have read “Fangirl” before this one. I didn’t really like that book’s main story (sorry!) but I found myself enjoying the snippets of Simon Snow’s story in it. It’s why after I read Fangirl in 2019 (on March that year, too!), I’ve hunted for this book in the sale events I went to. I’m not rich and a lot of things are on the expensive side in the country I live in - a book in it’s regular price is the same price as at least two days worth of food for my big family. I can’t afford it at it’s normal price so I had to find a discounted one and it was difficult.

Frustratingly enough, it seems the same event that sold the copy of Fangirl that I have also had Carry On and I just didn’t find it. I actually didn’t find my copy of Fangirl either and someone I saw who had it in their cart gave me theirs after I asked where the stock was. I decided to look online at secondhand sellers and everyone is still selling it at a price I can’t afford (it’s popular so they won’t just sell it for a low price). It was only a few months ago when I finally found someone online selling it at an affordable price. I was lucky to get it before someone else did. The same store was selling a copy of “Eleanor &Park” which I also want a copy of but couldn’t buy yet. I thought I’d buy it next time but it got sold out the same time I bought Carry On lol. I read E&P already so I let it slide - it was borrowed from a relative who no longer has it. I want my own copy cause I wanna reread it plus is sort of one of the reasons I became a bookworm in the first place so it’s important to me.

Anyways, it was worth it looking for this and not giving up on getting it. This is a really fun book I know I’d reread again someday. Now I guess I’ll look for the sequels. They’re only a few years old so it’d be a miracle if anyone sold them for cheap.

*sigh* The sad thing about novels are they usually don’t have any character photos though. I know there’s descriptions on the story itself but I have trouble imagining outfits especially school uniforms (I’m not really into fashion either so I don’t know exactly what some of the outfits were supposed to be). The two main characters do have official photos from the other book covers but they don’t seem to be wearing their uniforms though and the manga version of Fangirl (which I found out exist yesterday) apparently didn’t have their canon outfits/appearance from what I understood from the interview with the author. There’s also no official photo of the other characters as well. I wanna draw fanart but I can’t if I don’t have a reference. :P

Anyone know if the author released any reference photos or something?

----

This was hard to write. I’m not used to writing my thoughts on books (at least, not this long. I write shorter than this thoughts on goodreads). Well, that’s one book on my ‘want-to-read’ list crossed out. I also do the book challenge on goodreads and this is like, the 6th book out of the 10 I’m planning to read for 2022. XD

Lastly, in the book Fangirl where Simon Snow is a popular novel, it’s sad that Simon/Baz is a popular ship (non-canon, I think) and I can’t really blame anyone: they’re rivals/enemies which makes things interesting plus they’re roommates. lol

Well, that’s all I guess. This was long but I’ve written longer (the ToA one is longer than this, I think). It was fun and if anyone had read this far, thanks and I hope that had been an okay way to kill time.

#Carry On #Simon Snow #novel #sana_post #snowbaz #I ship it so I'm using the ship name lol

5 notes · View notes

lambourngb · 3 years

Note

If you are still doing this, to make it through (with hearts and wrists intact)

combining the wip ask with WIP Wednesday ! Alright, so there’s two remix challenges going on right now, but I didn’t sign up for either of them because I have enormous anxiety about deadlines and I’m also kind of a control freak about my work. I do love the concept, so I decided to remix my own work.

to make it through (with hearts and wrists intact) is a remix of Last Years Wishes. It is completely the fault of @haloud who mused aloud about what if Jesse got to use the shed on Michael. You guys remember what I did to the shed in LYW right? Yeah. Poor Michael. So while Alex is waiting at the Airstream, talking to agents Ross and Rollins, this is how Michael’s day is going....

[warnings: canon divergent within 1x13, mention of Michael’s feelings for Maria, but nothing happens past the discovery of Rosa’s body in the cave ]

“Old man, you are calling me on my day off,” Michael yelled into the receiver of his cell phone speaker over the rushing sound of air after picking up the call.

The windows were down because his AC in his truck went on the frizz again sometime during when Max had stolen-borrowed it to drive Liz home from Texas, leaving him behind to share a long awkward ride with Maria in her classic Chevy. Awkward because he had been buzzing from the encounter in the desert. He hadn’t slept with anyone in weeks, not since Alex, and that had been a ridiculous attempt for him to pine in celibacy considering just how little the other man had missed him. Some things end in a whimper.

Texas had been about hope, about maybe finding someone who was connected to him on a species level. He hadn’t realized how deeply Max’s enthusiasm had sunk into him until the fraud had been revealed and disappointment had set in. Between Alex’s brusque brush off and realizing they really were alone on this planet, Michael hadn’t thought he could feel even lower with the weight of Isobel’s salvation fully on his shoulders (and Liz’s). Then shining like a bright star in the night sky, he had found Maria.

She had effectively chased away the touch starved ghouls that had haunted his skin that night, he could still barely believe they had dropped right to the rocky ground and scratchy blanket to fuck. It was the type of raw passion he had with- no, in that particular moment he hadn’t thought about Alex but afterwards? He couldn’t avoid the connection the next morning, particularly when she had sworn him to secrecy, and then had reinforced it when she had fully kicked him out in the cold after he had returned her repaired necklace.

It was unfortunate for her that he was already wired to enjoy a push-pull hot-cold dynamic.

Ten years of Alex Manes meant Michael had learned to read past a blustering denial to see the real truth. She really liked him, she just didn’t want to admit it, and good god, if that wasn’t a déjà vu moment for Michael, he didn’t know what was. Maybe it was stupid to believe it would work out any better with her than it had with Alex, but with Noah dead, his m- his reason for building his ship gone, what did it hurt to try again?

His healed hand curled around the grip on the steering wheel with a shiver of disorientation at the new flexibility, but he pushed it down to concentrate on that meager bubble of hope of what was ahead for him. Maria. Normalcy. When he had offered to leave her alone at the gala, she had refused to take him up on it. That's the problem, I never do.

It had felt good to hear that, that he was wanted, even as he heard the conflict in her voice over what she desired versus what she thought she deserved to have. That was also painfully familiar to Michael as well.

Caulfield had seeped into his skin, three layers deep in the worst type of burn. That brief moment of his mother, wrapping around his mind with her love and sorrow and hope, and then she was gone. The screaming, that he had heard from outside the chain link fence, suddenly disappeared as the explosion moved outward in a shockwave. For a few minutes he had stood on solid ground in that prison, for the first time since a sweet boy had returned his kiss at seventeen under a galaxy of plastic foam planets, and then it was over. His mother was gone, and in her stead, he had Alex telling him that -

Michael forcefully pushed that thought away and returned his attention back to the cranky drawl of Walt Sanders, “I know kid, but I’m already out with the wrecker in the other ass-end direction, so I need you to go help this cry baby who can’t change a flat. Help me make some money, so I can afford to keep your ass employed.”

“Fine, tell me the location, but this is holiday pay, not overtime.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Sanders muttered, before rattling off the mile marker and the highway. “It’s a Lincoln sedan, black. Probably some old geezer out on a drive to church who ran into trouble.”

“You calling someone else a geezer is funny to me, I hope you know that,” Michael replied, hitting his turn signal to make a left to pick up the state road. It wasn’t as if he had a planned time to see Maria, the lunch hour and official opening of the bar was still an hour away. A little delay that made him some extra cash was doable.

“Shut the hell up kid, and get going,” Sanders griped good-naturedly, before hanging up on Michael.

The sun was bright overhead, the storm from the night before having washed the land and sky clean of clouds. Across the pavement ahead, the heat and the brightness, cast a mirage of dark shimmering water that creeped just out of reach as he drove toward his new destination. His mind ticked over the set of priorities ahead, to make a little money with a tire change, then to drop in on Maria to make his case, and finally, he knew he needed to swing by Isobel’s to check on her in the aftermath of Noah’s betrayal. Somewhere in all of that, he knew he would need to make it home to see Alex for that promised talk, but there was plenty of time for that because Alex rarely came by during the day to see him.

“I’m still fighting his battles, not mine.”

Michael flexed his hands on the steering wheel again and pushed down the heaviness in his heart that accompanied thinking about Alex. Ten long years of waiting and wanting him. If Michael cared to count up all of the trips to Roswell that Alex had made on leave, the two weeks together after the class reunion that frankly felt like a hallucination to Michael, all of those hours spent together would add up to a month. A month that stretched out over ten years, 520 weeks, or 3,650 days.

Counting the distance to the nearest star was in light years, but when it came to counting the distance between the stash of wedding rings he had purchased for Alex over the years and what he had been actually allowed to have with Alex, well, that was a calculation beyond the redshift spectrum. It would take energy to transverse that distance one more time, and Michael had nothing left inside to fuel that journey. He couldn’t afford to be lost in the black again, not with Isobel in free-fall from Noah’s years of manipulations, not with the prospect of telling Liz they had found Rosa’s body on the horizon. It was just too hard to believe that this time, with Alex calling him family, with Alex throwing back the closest declaration to love that he had ever made, actually meant he was ready to move toward Michael and work to cut the distance between them on his own.

It was better to head forward in a new direction, than to look back like Max had said. Besides, every other time he had failed to be enough of a reason to help Alex bridge his own chasm between what he wanted and what he had allowed himself to have. What could have changed? Caulfield had just cemented the complications for them both.

A dark shadow in the distance, parked just off the road caught Michael’s attention. He glanced down at the odometer to mark the mileage and started to ease up on the gas. That must be the motorist Sanders had fielded a call from earlier, he realized. The ‘old geezer’ in the black Lincoln with a flat tire. He glanced in the rearview mirror to check for traffic but the road behind him was devoid of other vehicles.

Michael hit the turn signal and hazard lights on his truck, turning briefly to the side to check that he had some spare water bottles for the customer and his toolbox within reach and then turned onto the shoulder of the highway. Mentally he was already five steps ahead of himself as he stepped out of the truck to approach the car, thinking about the size of socket to fit over the lug nuts for the Lincoln’s wheels, whether his torque wrench was even in his box, or if he would have to camouflage his telekinetic efforts to change out the tire, that it took a moment to realize the tires on the Lincoln were whole and unharmed on the driver’s side.

Puzzled, Michael slowed his approach, and started toward the passenger side of the car. The windows were rolled up and dark, the tint was straddling the threshold of legal for New Mexico. There was still no sign of defect in the tires, he noticed as he was halfway around the passenger fender. Faulty tire gauge, he mused before he noticed the engine was rumbling almost inaudibly. Fucking hybrid, which meant whatever issue it had been definitely beyond the parts available at Sanders.

It was a little odd that the driver hadn’t stepped out to greet Michael, but not terribly unusual when it came to elderly customers who seemed to have a healthy paranoia about everyone they encountered. Still, Michael pasted a smile on his face and tapped on the window.

The automatic window slipped downward in an expensive whisper, but it wasn’t a helpless old man on his way to church at the wheel.

Jesse Manes smiled at Michael flashing his teeth, “Surprise.” Before Michael could do more than step backward, Jesse lifted a large gun-shaped object and fired. Yellow particulate matter exploded into the air, enveloping Michael completely. Pulling his arm to his mouth to attempt to block the pollen, did little good as he felt the sedating effects almost immediately.

He coughed into the open air, scrambling back toward his truck on weak legs as he tried to clear his lungs of the fast-acting poison. Behind him, he heard the car door open, and the crunch of boots on the loose gravel from the road’s shoulder as Jesse approached him. Though his powers were gone and his strength was waning fast, Michael had never backed down from a fight in life.

Certainly, not a fight for his life.

Swinging with all of his might, he hurled his heavy toolbox at Jesse blindly. There was a thump and a curse, but the footsteps kept coming. Animal-like terror set in as Michael crawled now on his knees toward the cab of his truck. He had to move, he had to live, he wasn’t going to die here on the side of the damn road- Suddenly a black boot came down on his hand, pinning him place and lighting up a fierce agony of pain in its wake.

“I like the fight, Guerin, I do,” Jesse remarked with a quiet menace. “Shall I make this hand match your other-”

It was on the tip of Michael’s tongue to point out the obvious, but then Jesse saw it for himself. His left hand, healed and pristine, clutching at the hot blacktop surface.

“I see.” He barked out a laugh that chilled Michael. “I knew it. I knew you weren’t the only one in Roswell. I thought about killing you right here you know, but now, you might finally serve a purpose in your useless life. You thought you could use my son in your perverted schemes? Well now it’s your turn to be bait.”

Michael’s vision was already fading into blindness with the pollen taking hold, but he managed to spit out between numb lips, “Go fuck yourself.”

“Not today. You’re the one who is fucked.” A hand grabbed a tight hold of Michael’s hair, wrenching him backward, and then it was merciful darkness.

***

#malex fic #wip wednesday #last years wishes universe #wip meme #michael guerin #jesse manes is his own warning #Anonymous

24 notes · View notes

aurora077 · 3 years

Text

Intervention

Summary: Lan Xichen’s seclusion had gone on long enough, in Jiang Cheng’s opinion. It was time for an intervention. Fem!JC

Author's Note: This work is set in jiucengta ‘s haunting legacies au (https://archiveofourown.org/series/1716682)which I suggest you check out. Jiang Cheng is female and was married to Wei Wuxian before shit hit the fan. The relationships are not explicitly stated here, it's very background. I just had this idea and wanted to get it out there. I may or may not do another fic very similar to this one but not set in an AU, just post-canon instead.

-----------------------------------------

Two years had gone by since the fateful Guanyin Temple incident that rocked the cultivation world. Two years (a little more really) since Jiang Cheng’s erstwhile husband had returned from the dead. Two years (a little less actually but who’s counting) since she lost her widowed status and gained an extra love to boot somewhere in the middle. And two years since Sect Leader Lan had gone into seclusion, punishing himself for his blindness and mourning the loss of both his sworn brothers.

Normally Jiang Cheng would not stick her nose in other sects’ business. But Gusu Lan had become more than just another sect to her; it was important to those she loved and so, it was also important to her. And even if things hadn’t turned out the way they did in her personal life, Lan Xichen is someone she would have wanted to help anyway. During the thirteen years her husband had been dead he had been one of the few to show any open support for her.

She would never forget that fateful discussion conference-- the one where she’d been dubbed Wife of the Yiling Demon after she rebuffed Jin Guangshan’s attempt to pressure her into marriage (brokered by him no less-- undoubtedly trying to get her to wed one of his own relatives...control over the Jiang could only work in his favour). Loudmouthed Sect Leader Yao would have turned things even uglier for her had it not been for Lan Xichen’s timely intervention on her behalf. His steady support had helped her in more ways than one over the years despite the fact that they were not ever particularly close. With Gusu Lan seemingly in her corner, the voices that would (and initially, did) loudly decry a young female Sect Leader were forced to whisper instead.

That was why she found herself sitting opposite the man, sipping on a cup of tea as he gazed inquisitively at her.

“Sect Leader Jiang,” he greeted, sounding weary, voice containing only a trace of his former warmth, “What brings you here? As you know I am still in seclusion, technically, I should not be having visitors. Is there something urgent that you need my help with?”

“Yes,” she said, and continued bluntly as was her way, “I’m here to convince you to leave it.”

His eyes widened slightly. “Excuse me?”

“You heard me.”

It spoke to the measure of self control the Lan’s had that he didn’t simply kick her out of the hanshi.

“I beg your pardon but I don’t see how that’s any of your business.”

She cleared her throat and tried to measure her words more carefully; she didn’t want to be asked to leave before she had made her arguments and she tried to remember that this Lan Xichen had been hurt too deeply to retain his former magnanimity.

“You may not know it Lan Xichen, but outside these walls you are sorely missed.”

His lips twitched, as if he wanted to smile but couldn’t quite make it.

“I’m aware my family may miss me, Sect Leader Jiang, but I had no idea that you harbored such strong feelings towards me that you now miss my presence.”

She sputtered slightly, not expecting him to joke about it when he looked like he could keel over if she spoke too loudly. “I…” her face turned red, “That wasn’t what…”

Taking pity on her he waved her protests away, voice becoming more solemn, “Why don’t you tell me why you think I should leave my seclusion. You of all people should understand why I need to do this. It was your family hurt the most by my ignorance.”

She drew in a breath to steady herself, “Did you hold me responsible when Wei Wuxian did all the crap that he did?”

“That’s different, he was manipulated,” he frowned.

“Nobody knew that until recently Zewu-Jun. And manipulation or not he still made choices that led to a lot of harm. So I ask you again, was I to blame? Should I not have been able to stop my husband? Is it not, therefore also my fault? Maybe I should join you in seclusion since his demonic cultivation was partly because he gave me his core and had no options left.”

He looked pained, “I have never blamed you for his choices. You couldn’t help what you didn’t know. None of us knew he didn’t have a core.”

“And none of us knew Jin Guangyao was a megalomaniac either. So how can you be blamed for his choices? If you are to shoulder the blame then so should all the rest of us.”

“The rest of you weren’t his sworn brothers!” he almost shouted.

“Mingjue knew. He warned me not to trust him so many times. I dismissed him. I thought he was paranoid and misjudging A-Yao like so many others. If he could see it, why didn’t I? I wronged Da-ge in the worst way because I thought I knew better than him,” His breathing was coming out ragged, “I thought A-Yao was the one who knew me best. Who I knew best.”

It spoke to his state of mind that he even let all of that out in front of her.

“Sect Leader Jiang, the man I considered my closest companion is the man most hated by the cultivation world and reviled as a monster. How do you think I must look in comparison? I am sure there are those out there wondering if I had known and if I even helped him with all of his plans. There are people who will speculate as to the bounds of our relationship. If I did not go into seclusion they would say I had no shame, look what his sworn brother did and he’s out and about like normal. Then there are those who look at my decision to seclude myself as an indicator of guilt and may accuse me of complicity. Or they will look at my mourning and see someone who mourns a monster and who does that? Why mourn a monster? Sect Leader Yao even openly criticised your young nephew for crying at the coffin of his uncle who also helped raise him. A parentless child who saw one of his only remaining close family members die brutally after being exposed as a serious criminal, who even threatened him with bodily harm, could not grieve him without censure. What of a grown man, and a Sect Leader at that!”

“With all due respect, so what?”

“E..excuse me?” Lan Xichen was torn between being confused and insulted.

“You heard me. So. What?” she started, “So what if they think these things? Does that make it true? If Sect Leader Yao thinks that you’re an incestuous troll would that make it true? If Sect Leader Ouyang says ‘hey did you know that Sect Leader Lan likes to visit brothels in secret’ would that make it true? Just because people think something does not make it a reality. Your sect certainly does not believe you are responsible for the actions of Jin Guangyao and would stand by you if anyone insinuates otherwise. You have your brother and your uncle who love you and are worried about you. Your sect has thrived under your leadership and undoubtedly they all miss you too.”

That Lan Jingyi kid couldn’t shut up about how much he missed Zewu-Jun. And she knew Lan Zhan missed his brother and lamented that he could not do more for him. He and Lan Qiren were working themselves ragged trying to pick up the pieces. He’d hardly had time to come back to Lotus Pier and she and Wei Ying missed him dearly. They’d had to make up so many ‘official’ reasons to find themselves in the Cloud Recesses so that they could spend some time together. So yes on the one hand it would be good for them if Zewu-Jun were to leave seclusion but she wasn’t simply doing it for that reason. It was because if anyone could understand what Zewu-Jun was going through, it would be her. And she didn’t think that seclusion was going to help anything. All it would do is make him ruminate on his mistakes over and over again until he likely went mad himself.

“You said that the man you considered your closest companion turned out to be a monster. Gee, I wonder what that feels like? You said that people will wonder if you helped him with his plans, oh gee, I wonder what that feels like?” Zewu-Jun had the grace to look abashed at that.

She continued, softer, “You said people will talk about what kind of person mourns a monster. But you’re not mourning a monster, are you? When A-Ling cried over his coffin, did you blame him for it? Did you think ‘why is this child mourning when he should celebrate the end of the one who fractured his family?’ like Sect Leader Yao did?” Zewu-Jun shook his head but didn’t say anything, letting her continue.

“A-Ling was mourning the loss of the uncle he knew. And you are mourning the loss of the companion he had been to you. The world will only ever view him as a monster because the world never knew him. But you did. Maybe you didn’t know everything about him, but not everything about him was fake. I hate Jin Guangyao, I will not pretend otherwise. But I was there, Zewu-Jun. I was there, and I could see that he truly did care for you and value you. Not everything he showed you would have been fake. You of all people probably got more sincerity out of him than anyone else. And so you, of all people, have a right to mourn the man he was, the same way A-Ling still mourns the loss of the man who gifted a lonely child a dog. Not everything had an ulterior motive. Even monsters can love can’t they? Even monsters had people who loved them. I would know. So if you need to mourn him… then just mourn him.

Who gives a damn what people will say about it? People will always talk, Zewu-Jun. It doesn’t matter what you do or don’t do, people will believe what they want to believe. So why let their opinions force you into repenting for something you didn’t even do? Let them think what they want to think. It is not a crime to be deceived. We all were. Why take the world on your shoulders when you don’t actually have to? And again, with all due respect Sect Leader Lan, if I, a family-less, alliance-less woman whose husband was the most reviled personage in the jianghu, who suffered the scorn of the cultivation world for over a decade, could raise my nephew on my own and build my sect back from literal ashes into one of the strongest and most respected once again, then you, who have a strong sect and people who love you, who believe in you and will support you no matter what… you can manage to live too.”

“Sect Leader Jiang…” Zewu-Jun was at a loss for words. What could he say? It only sounded selfish and petty to claim that he suffered more than she did, because he truly didn’t. She was right after all. Sect Leader Jiang was a remarkable woman. Life had not been kind to her. And...her words struck something within him. He felt ashamed. He hadn’t even thought about what it was like for her before this. He’d never offered her any support, but here she was trying to get him to live his life again without guilt. She, whose family most assuredly suffered because of his inaction, was here telling him to let it go, to not take responsibility. But how could he do that so easily?

“How did you do it? Sect Leader Jiang...” his voice cracked, “Can you ever forgive me, for the harm that my inaction caused you and your family?” Maybe if he heard it from her, maybe he could begin to forgive himself.

She sighed. “On my part, there is nothing to forgive Zewu-Jun. And so I can’t grant you forgiveness because you haven’t done me any wrong. But there are a few people who do deserve an apology from you. And your seclusion is a self-imposed punishment that you feel you deserve but at the end of the day, it does not actually do anything tangible when it comes to making amends to those who have been hurt.”

He was silent for a moment, stunned by her words. He hadn’t considered that his seclusion might have been causing others even more harm than he’d already done to them. Sect Leader Jiang was wise (she would disagree...she’d just learned from bitter experience in her opinion). He felt like he’d done her a great disservice all of these years, by not making an effort to reach out to her.

“Please, tell me. I.. I confess I no longer trust my judgement. I thought I knew A-Yao. I thought I was a good judge of character. I no longer know how to tell what is up from down. All I know is that I was so, so wrong about A-Yao. If you say that I have not harmed you then I am glad. I would hate to be the cause of more pain. You said that I am not responsible for A-Yao’s actions, and though it isn’t easy to believe that just yet, if there are those who I have truly wronged then please...please tell me. I still don’t know if I am ready to leave seclusion, if I even know how to, but I need to atone for my actions.”

Jiang Cheng nodded, “That’s the right attitude at least. So to start with I’d say you need to have a chat with Huaisang.”

His eyes widened, “I… I don’t know if that’s such a good idea, Sect Leader Jiang.” His face darkened slightly. He wasn’t pleased with Huaisang at the moment. It felt like he never even knew him.

“And why not? Out of everyone, it’s Huaisang that you unintentionally hurt. And I don’t mean because of not listening to Nie Mingjue. His death was not your fault.” He was about to protest but she cut him off. “It wasn’t. I told you, stop taking responsibility for what isn’t your fault and own up to what is.”

He sighed heavily, “If it’s not about Da-ge then how did I wrong Huaisang?”

“Well for one, you’re still his Er-ge. Yet you seem to have forgotten that in lieu of what happened in the temple. Huaisang… has lost everyone. He may have been acting like a shady shit for the past however many years but… do you know what it’s like to be the last one of your family, Zewu-Jun? To have nobody beside you except subordinates?” He inhaled sharply. “I.. I hadn’t thought of that,” he said mournfully. How much did he just not consider? What kind of a person was he that he resented Huaisang for his deceit but yet did not consider for one moment that Huaisang may have done those things because he thought he was all alone and could not come to him for help? What kind of brother was he that his little brother could not confide in him? He should have been there for Huaisang, instead he had thought so highly of Jin Guangyao, even dismissing da-ge’s claims, that Huaisang had not dared to approach him with his suspicions.

Sect Leader Jiang was being very understanding however, “Zewu-Jun, I know you’re not pleased with Huaisang. I know there are many things that he’s done that are not right. I know there’s a possibility that he lied and forced your hand at the end. Believe me, I know the feeling...more than anyone, I know what it feels like to be deceived by someone you love...to kill someone you love. I know what it feels like when everyone praises you for it. Like you did such a great thing and you should be happy and celebrating with everyone else, except you can’t because your heart has shattered…has been ripped to shreds.

As someone who once loved a so-called monster...as someone who as good as killed that person with their own hands, I understand better than anyone what you’re going through. What Huaisang did was cruel, even though I’m glad Jin Guangyao is dead. It was cruel to have you be the one to end him. Huaisang likely knew that Jin Guangyao valued you. He knew it would be the worst end for him to be killed by your hand. I can’t speak for Huaisang, but I don’t believe he did it to hurt you, even though that’s inevitably what happened anyway. He did it to hurt Jin Guangyao. But even though it was not kind of him to have you be the arbiter of justice, he still deserves to have his Er-ge in his life.

She paused remembering the pain of losing her husband and sister all in one night.

She didn't have to imagine how Huaisang would have felt at losing the last member of his family at the hands of someone he cared about.“You and I aren’t the only ones who were deceived by someone we loved. Huaisang loved Jin Guangyao too, didn’t he? He loved and trusted him. When Nie Mingjue was getting worse, didn’t Huaisang trust and rely on both you and Jin Guangyao? It wasn’t a front. You were both dear to him. He loved him. He loved him and was betrayed by him in the worst way. And then yes, he orchestrated a whole convoluted plan to have him exposed and killed.

But you and I can both attest that justice, and even revenge, doesn’t stop the pain does it? Huaisang avenged his brother, but he lost another in the process, the same way you did. Don’t let him lose you too. You said you wronged Nie Mingjue by not listening to him. I think you’d wrong him even more if you left his little brother alone, without anyone to call family. You don’t have to forgive Huaisang right away, or at all if you don’t want to, but eventually you should at least try and reconcile with him. You’re his big brother... the only one left. And you know, Huaisang would have had the realisation that he was fooled by Jin Guangyao all on his own. But you don’t have to be alone.

Huaisang and you share the experience of being blinded by him. It would be much easier to talk to someone who has gone through the same things, no? Huaisang is there. And I am here. You don’t have to endure this on your own. We may not be very close Zewu-Jun, but we can understand each other, not so? So I’m here if you need someone to confide in. And Huaisang...Huaisang must be waiting too. For his Er-ge. You both owe each other apologies.”

By the time she was done speaking there were tears rolling down his face. She didn’t think it was quite appropriate given their positions, (though she was sort of his secret sister-in-law so really, he counted as family) but she moved over to his side and embraced him. If he was surprised he didn’t show it, only moving to cling to her more tightly and sob with a ferocity that had her a bit surprised. She wondered if this was the first time since the temple that he’d allowed himself to fully grieve what he had lost, without the guilt of letting his sworn brother die, killing the other one, and feeling bad for mourning for someone who he should hate.

Everyone praised him for killing Jin Guangyao however, it was something he didn’t want to be praised for. But what could he say? That he hated the fact that he killed him? He was right about one thing, if he ever said something like that people would most assuredly say he was complicit and probably want to implicate him. Jiang Cheng of all people knew how hard it was to listen to people praising you for a deed you were not proud of. And so she was the only person who would understand. The only person who would, who could, acknowledge the hurt it would have caused him to do what he did, especially if he was tricked into it.

His feelings about Huaisang would be complicated, but it wasn’t too late to reconcile as long as they were both alive.

She rubbed his back consolingly and just let him cry. It must have been no more than 15 minutes, but it felt much longer, before his tears slowed. When his sobs petered out he tried to compose himself. She let go of him and he embarrassedly turned away, sipping his tea. He cleared his throat, “I’m sorry Sect Leader Jiang, that was unbecoming of me.”

“Don’t mention it,” she waved off. She was there to help after all.

“I will give your words due consideration. It was remiss of me to forget that I was not the only one affected by A-Yao’s schemes. I truly regret not thinking of how Huaisang would have felt when he first found out. You are right. I have done my little brother a disservice,” he said, voice croaky from his bout of sobbing.

“You said that there were people I needed to apologise to. Who else have I wronged?” he continued. His respect and admiration for Sect Leader Jiang had grown exponentially since the start of this visit. He would take her words under advisement if he could.

“Oh Zewu-Jun,” she sighed, “What you’re doing with this seclusion, doesn’t it remind you of someone? Because it sure reminds your uncle.”

Zewu-Jun looked as if she had slapped him.

“Nobody would begrudge you needing time to grieve and to come to terms with what happened, it is human nature. It’s understandable. We were all blindsided. And I understand the wish to seclude yourself because I wish I could have as well, though I didn’t have the luxury,” she said, not unkindly but it made him wince anyway, “But it’s been too long. A few months would be okay, though grief will last longer than that, but more than that is just being unfair to others. You are the Sect Leader. Your uncle has already had to watch his brother shirk his duties and seclude himself from the world for the rest of his life.

Your uncle has had to pick up the slack. He raised you and your brother like a father would, while taking care of sect matters. None of those things were his responsibility yet he did it. And now… now he has to go through it all over again. Master Lan is elderly though and he cannot keep up with all of the duties required of an elder, teacher and now Sect Leader once more. And so that leads me to the last person that you have wronged.

Lan Zhan is Chief Cultivator now, did you know? His duties are myriad and yet he has to come back here and help Master Lan run the sect. It pains Master Lan to see history repeating itself. A younger brother once again has to take the reins from his older brother and he does it without complaint, because he loves you. But it is unfair to A-Zhan. He can’t live his own life because he’s too busy living yours. He’s barely managing to keep up with both sets of duties, but he’s doing it for you. It has been two years, Zewu-Jun. He worries so much about you, as does your uncle. It pains them to see you this way. And so Sect Leader Lan,” she pointedly used his rank, “I beg of you to consider leaving your seclusion. You have people who love you waiting for you. Your family needs you.”

His eyes were glittering once more, but no tears were shed this time. He swallowed thickly. The past few months it had seemed as if he was living in a fog. He’d barely managed to keep his routine up, it was only through decades of strict routine that he’d gotten himself off the bed and eaten his food and meditated everyday on his shortcomings. But it seemed that while he was doing that he’d missed quite a few. Because she was right wasn’t she? He hid himself away like a coward and didn’t even think about how it would affect Wangji and Uncle. He hadn’t even considered how hurt his uncle would feel to see him go down the same route as his father.

Her words were like a splash of cold water. It seemed to wake him up; it got him out of the daze he was in. If this woman before him could raise a child and a sect from the ashes all alone after going through more tragedy than a hundred people in one lifetime would...he could get himself in gear and do what he had to do. He felt ashamed in front of her. She was right that she didn’t have the luxury to seclude herself. But he did. He did, and he took advantage of the support system that he had to take time for himself. More time than he should have.

She said it was understandable, and maybe it was, but she was also right that it should not have been going on for this long. He had no desire to be Qingheng-Jun the second. But if she hadn’t come here today… if she hadn’t said all that she had said… He would not have even thought of those things. He was too busy thinking of himself. It was likely that he would have stayed for years in his seclusion, just ruminating on what went wrong and what he could have changed. It was all too easy to get caught up in could-have-beens.

“Sect Leader Jiang,” he said, devastated at the thought of his uncle, the man who raised him when he didn’t have to, who did his best to prevent them from turning out like their father, thinking that he had failed when it was Lan Xichen who failed, “I’ve heard you loud and clear. But…”

“But?”

“But I don’t know if I even know how to go about being Sect Leader anymore. I feel like the decisions I make would be questionable now. How can I trust that I will do what’s best for the sect? I have already failed in so many ways. Now I have failed Wangji and Uncle too.”

“What did I tell you? You’re not alone Zewu-Jun. You don’t have to leave seclusion immediately. You don’t even have to start doing everything right away. Ease back into it. Your family will be there to help you. I’m offering to help you. If you need to talk about things that you can’t with them, you can write to me. Master Qiren should not have to be taking on these responsibilities any longer and A-Zhan needs to have time to breathe...his own position is challenging enough. Besides you haven’t failed, you’ve just had some setbacks is all. Failure would be wallowing in self-pity forever and leaving everyone else to do your duties indefinitely,” she looked at him pointedly. He got the hint.

“Okay Sect Leader Jiang. I shall take you up on that then. But I do have a question if you’ll indulge me,” he said.

“Shoot.”

“I mean no offense at all, in fact I’m actually extremely grateful for your concern, but I am curious….why do you even care? You didn’t have to do any of this. I’m well aware that you have your own duties and worries. Why bother about mine?”

She smiled for the first time since she walked into the Hanshi. He was struck by it. It had been a long time since he’d seen her smile... truly smile. In fact, the last time he’d seen a smile as bright as that on her face was probably right here in the Cloud Recesses when she was a student.

“You may not remember it, Zewu-Jun, but there was a time Jin Guangshan sought to marry me off. It was your words of support for me, against that awful Sect Leader Yao, that saved my skin, though they still called me Wife of the Yiling Demon after that. But at least I was only his wife. I will be eternally grateful to you for that. It was thanks to your words that nobody else tried to make me marry. I was able to focus on my sect in relative peace. It was a kindness that I have never been able to repay until now, though you shouldn’t think that it is only because of repayment.”

She got up and dusted off her clothes perfunctorily.

“I shall take my leave now, Zewu-Jun.”

“Please, call me Xichen,” he said, thinking that after all of the things that were said that day, she might as well.

“Well then, Xichen you may call me Wanyin. Thank you for hearing me out and please forgive me for barging in unexpectedly. I have intruded upon your hospitality long enough.”

“It is no matter,” he said, and for the first time in a long while he was able to manage a weak smile, “I was honored by your company. If you did not give me so much to think about, I would offer you some more tea.”

She laughed, “Thank you Xichen, but I will be missed soon anyway. I do not need to cause an uproar in Cloud Recesses if they can’t find a Sect Leader. Plus the scandal that would happen if someone other than A-Zhan or A-Yuan finds me in here will not be pleasant.”

“A-Zhan?” he raised an eyebrow, “Is there something I should know about, Wanyin?”

She snorted and threw him a cheeky smirk, “If you want to find out you’ll have to come to Lotus Pier.” And with that she saw herself out, leaving nothing but the scent of lotuses behind her.

Huh. Well then. How curious. He’d thought that Wangji had gone off with Wei Wuxian, who he’d been in love with since he met him. How did Sect Leader Jiang factor into this? As far as he knew they didn’t even particularly like each other. It seemed like he missed quite a lot while he was in seclusion. Was his little brother in a love triangle? It would explain why Wanyin said that he shouldn’t only think of her visit as repayment to him. It wasn’t the purest motivation but huh maybe he would leave seclusion after all. His brother might need support in more ways than one. Sect Leader Lan leaving seclusion because he was too invested in his brother’s love life was a hilarious thought, and for the first time in two years, he chuckled mirthfully to himself. Maybe he would be okay after all.

8 notes · View notes

bumbleberrysky · 4 years

Text

alexa, play candyshop (bass boosted) | 02

pairing: gabriel x reader genre: soulmate au, canon divergent around s13, hurt/comfort, humour, future smut (probs) wc: 3.7k rating: sfw warnings: same as before, wounded gabriel & removal of those stitches notes: the fire under my ass burns as strong as ever, hallelujah

You knew there was a reason some divine power brought you to the Winchesters all those years ago, but to this day you still have no idea what that reason is. It’s something you’re destined to find out soon though, especially when you return to the bunker after months away and find not only a new face, but one that belongs to someone who up until that point you’d thought was dead. What does his return have to do with the changes you’re suddenly experiencing in yourself? Will you finally find out the reason you’d been brought here in the first place? Maybe…

Chuck works in mysterious ways after all.

prev. || next

Much to your regret, your plans the next morning to continue being a nuisance to Dean are thrown in the bin at his decision to leave early and meet Castiel somewhere a state over for a case that the angel had found. Something about vamps in a mine or something, you’re a bit hazy on the details. You’d only half-listened when Sam filled you in upon your arrival in the kitchen, a good hour after Dean had already departed the bunker.

While you would like to say Dean is completely to blame, the truth is that once you passed out last night you slept like a log and didn’t wake up until mid-morning today, which classifies as a sleep-in of sorts for you. You love sleep, but your body is wired to wake up not long after sunrise, unfortunately. It’s that hunter lifestyle you love to hate.

Sam had huffed a laugh at your face when you found out you’d missed Dean, but otherwise had kept to himself with his healthy breakfast as you went about making yourself a coffee. You tend to be a bit nauseous in the mornings, so a coffee will be enough for you for a few hours. It’s likely your stomach won’t roar in hunger until a bit after midday, as it is wont to do.

“How is your arm?”

Sam’s question breaks you out of the dissociative state you’d slipped into as you sip your coffee, grip on the mug tightening in reflex. It takes a few blinks before your eyes focus back on him, a small smile on your lips.

“Much better, thank you doctor,” you answer, before mumbling into your coffee as you take another sip. “Despite apparent attempts at making it otherwise…”

Sam snorts, not even bothering to comment on that. “I’m glad. Did you have anything planned for the day?”

A contemplative hum escapes you, your gaze wandering to the ceiling. “No, not really. I kind of went hard for a while there, one case after the other, so I’m due for a break. Not much of a fan of burnout.”

Your eyes move back down, meeting his own. “I’m probably going to just hang back, for a bit. Recuperate. I mean, I didn’t get any injury besides my arm, but I’m just… tired, I suppose. Didn’t get much sleep the past few weeks.”

“Of course you didn’t hurt anything but your arm,” Sam rolls his eyes, taking a sip of his smoothie—you’re not a fan of the green tinge it has, but if he likes it then you suppose it must be alright, at least. “You and your stupid good luck. Dean is still mad about last time, you know. When he got splattered in monster guts that just missed you by a centimetre.”

The memory yanks a giggle out of you before you can stop it, almost spilling your coffee as a result of the abrupt movement. “Oh, that was good. I wish I had a picture so I could scrapbook it.”

Sam laughs around a mouthful of food, swallowing it down before he continues. “Dean would kill you.”

“I know, but it would be worth it.” You place your cup down, deciding it a better course of action than continuing to hold it and risking spillage. “Also, I know you think my luck is really good all the time, but it’s kind of just good occasionally. All other times, it sucks.”

“It kicks in when you hunt, though, so I suppose that’s all that matters,” Sam muses, flicking through an article on his phone somewhat distractedly. He hums to himself before turning the screen off and angling his body to you properly, meeting your questioning gaze.

“I’m… I’m gonna need your help,” he says, appearing somewhat sheepish. “With Gabriel.”

You try not to let your sharp intake of breath show, but from the look that flickers through Sam’s eyes you figure he catches it anyway. Your teeth worry your bottom lip for a moment before you can muster a proper response. “Alright. What are you thinking of doing?”

Sam adjusts once more, pushing his plate away, cutlery stacked on top; it’s only now that you realise he’s finished the meal and the only thing left to consume is his smoothie.

“Well, I’m not… entirely sure yet.”

You huff a laugh, attempting to regain a sense of normalcy. It isn’t that you’d forgotten about the battered archangel hiding in a room a few doors down from yours, but it’s moreso that you’d made it a point not to think about it so early in the morning, lest your mood be ruined for the entire day. Thinking of Gabriel… it kind of hurt. You’re not sure you’re ready to sit down and analyse exactly why you’re having such visceral reactions yet.

“I don’t think we can really plan much, here,” he says, features softening with empathy. It reminds you that when it comes to Hell and being tortured, the youngest Winchester isn’t as unfamiliar as you might hope. A pang of something hits against the confines of your chest at his tone and the passing look in his eyes; as always, there’s the useless feeling, the wish you could take away all the bad memories and experiences and make it all better. You know you can’t, nothing can, but you hate seeing your friends in any modicum of pain.

You suppose that includes Gabriel, if the sensations whirling within you at the thought of him are anything to go by.

“We’ll just have to take it as it comes,” you say, taking your mug into your hold and downing the rest of the drink in one go. “Alright! I’m gonna shower and then… I guess we go see him.”

x x

Unlike the Gabriel you were once so familiar with, this Gabriel is decidedly not fond of visitors.

Sam had gone and prepared some things while you’d showered and dressed, and by the time you reappear outside your room you hear shuffling from the direction of the library. Curious, you make your way down the hall, peeking your head in and blinking in only minor surprise at the sight of Sam, his shoulders heavy.

“What’s up, Sam-o-saurus?”

Sam looks up and gives you the closest approximation to a bitch face that you’ve ever received from him, clearly not fond of the new nickname that came to you on the spot like a divine enlightenment. He takes a moment to close his eyes and breathe, though, which is probably for the best considering your mission for the day. It would do none of you any good if he went near Gabriel while all riled up.

“Gabriel is, uh,” he clears his throat, placing down a sterile steel tray in the shape of a bean and small surgical scissors, along with a scalpel. Your gaze strays to the side and sees that it was the first aid box he’d been ransacking as you arrived. “Not very open to visitation from me right now. I think I might be a bit… bit big. He doesn’t really even see me when he looks at me, so I don’t think he realises who I am.”

You wince, trying not to dwell on the information longer than needed to file it away for later consideration. “Oh. Sorry, Sam. You want me to go see if I can bring him out?”

“Please,” the tall man says, gesturing to the tools on the glossy oak table. “I figured we could start by getting rid of those stitches over his mouth, if nothing else. I don’t think he has enough grace right now to stop infection so we should try and reduce the risk.”

His words sadden you, but you know the truth they hold. Your limbs feel a bit heavy as you push away from the doorway.

“Alright. I’ll be right back.”

Gabriel’s allocated room isn’t all that far from the library, and the note on the door sticks out like a sore thumb so you don’t have to worry much about getting lost on the way (ignoring that at this point you know most parts of the bunker like the back of your hand). Once outside his room, something gives you pause though.

Are you ready to see him in that state again? Or is it that a small, tiny part of you fears he won’t recognise you, either?

Ridiculous of you, really. You take a moment to admonish yourself for the thought. If you take a second to factor in the difference in time spent in hell, even without considering all the time he was missing, Gabriel had to have been trapped and tortured for over a century at the very least. Centuries and years might mean nothing to a celestial being who has been alive for millennia, but over a century of fear and torture is a lot even for someone with such impressive mileage.

You shake your head, attempting to clear your thoughts and emotions so you don’t enter his room with an overwhelming aura. Okay, showtime.

A soft knock echoes as your knuckles meet the wood, a moment passing before you speak, attempting to keep your voice as soft and nonthreatening as possible.

“Gabriel? It’s y/n, I’m going to come in now.”

You allow another moment to pass before you ease the door open, blinking in surprise as your eyes are greeted by light—it seems the archangel has every bulb in the vicinity burning its brightest. Understandable, since you presume he wasn’t exactly kept in well-lit conditions.

For a second, you think he’s not in the room. You don’t see him anywhere, and you’re about a split-second away from turning and calling Sam when you catch a glimpse of something shifting in the corner, behind the bulky side of a wooden dresser. You think for a second that you’ve forgotten how to breathe, chest painfully tight, as you realise that the small form huddled and curled in the corner is, in fact, the archangel Gabriel.

You hate that you’d noticed him only because of the filthy scraps of material that stick out against the dark décor of the bunker.

“Hey, Gabriel,” you say softly, keeping the door open so he has a route of escape and moving over as slowly and cautiously as you can. “I’m just gonna come over and sit in front of you, alright?”

You figure that even if he’s not entirely listening to everything you’re saying, it’s better to announce what you’re doing before you do it, for his benefit.

Something painful ricochets off the inside of your chest as you grow close enough to see him around the dresser and you’re confronted with his beaten, bloody and battered figure once more. His gaze is anywhere but you, and the way he presses himself into the corner is like he’s trying to make himself as small as possible. It takes all of your willpower to squash down the unexpected sob that catches low in your throat. What is wrong with you?! You need to get a grip.

“Oh, Gabriel,” you find yourself saying before you can stop. “I’m so sorry…”

The closer you get to him, the lower you try to make yourself in his peripheral. It wouldn’t do any good to startle him by appearing big and threatening. It makes you frown when you remember just who it is that you have to think this way about. It’s sad, you think. The Gabriel you’d known was prideful, glaringly bright and loud in his presence, both as a trickster and an angel, and that he’d been reduced to… well, to this? It made your chest feel heavy.

Slowly and as quietly as possible, you ease down onto your knees in front of him, doing your best not to rush anything. It’s hard—you’re a hunter, used to moving with speed and a sense of urgency. So to take your time and really be in the moment for each of your actions is definitely an odd change from the usual autopilot your brain resides in.

He doesn’t acknowledge your presence once you’re still in front of him, not really. You had expected as much though, and as much as he seems unresponsive you do see the occasional flick of his eyes in your direction before they dart away, like he couldn’t believe he’d dared to look at someone instead of the floor.

For a few minutes, you simply let him adjust to your presence, your company. Ever so slowly, you see the tiniest bits of tension ease from his shoulders, his eyes no longer darting around like a frantic squirrel. You take the opportunity to take in the wounds and sores littering his body, doing your best not to get too upset by what you see. Dirt and grime coats him in layers, and you mentally note that your next goal with him would be to get him in a damn bath.

It can’t be comfortable, sitting in all that grime…

“For the sake of transparency,” you begin when he seems like he will be open enough to listening. “I’ll tell you why I’m here. This is your space right now, and I don’t want to intrude on it unless I really need to.”

He doesn’t meet your gaze, but you sense you have his attention. “Given that right now you’re low on… strength, and not healing as you usually do, we need to take care of some of the worse wounds you have. If we don’t, it’s a risk of infection, and we don’t know how well you would fight that off in this state…”

You clear your throat, attempting to keep yourself on track. “So, if you’re able, we’d really like you to come out just for a moment, so we can fix up some of your sores. I promise that you can come right back in here afterwards, and that unless we have something really important we’ll leave you alone. Sound good?”

He doesn’t nod, doesn’t really move, but the way his eyes move to yours and hold your gaze for a bare second longer than you expect, you gather he’s not entirely against it. You offer him a smile, oddly proud of him. You’d seen firsthand how hard it can be to get out of these mindsets, even just for a moment. Effort is hard and that he’s making it means everything.

“Perfect,” you say, shifting in your spot so you can stand more easily. “Alright, I can help you up, if you’d like, or you can stand on your own if you want. What do y—”

Your hands had already begun to outstretch as you spoke, and you’re taken by surprise when before you even finish speaking his hand is whipping up to grab your wrist in a sort of monkey grip. You’re left blinking as you help him up, moving on autopilot. You expect him to release you as soon as he’s standing, but it adds to your surprise as he wobbles in place and retains his grip, if anything shuffling a little closer.

“Okay,” you say, angling your body and adjusting your grip so that it’s loose and as nonthreatening as possible. “Let’s go. Thank you for cooperating.”

Of course, there’s no response and he’s silent the whole way to the library. You remember that Sam is in there only as you approach the threshold, but unlike what you feared, Gabriel doesn’t seem to react too poorly to him like he apparently had earlier. Risking a glance his way reveals that actually, amongst the frayed and almost manic energy, he seems oddly… grounded, just for the moment.

Well, this is certainly going better than you’d anticipated.

“I went to bully Dean this morning, but he woke up before me and left before I could get to him.”

You’re in the process of cleaning the wounds around Gabriel’s mouth and removing the ugly stitches that have been sewn into his lips. As something to distract him as much as you from what you’re doing, you’ve begun chatting idly to the archangel, unbothered by the lack of response. Sam sits a metre or so away, researching for Dean who had apparently called earlier when you were coercing Gabriel out of his room.

Still Gabriel doesn’t hold your gaze, eyes averted as he leans forward in the chair for you to reach his mouth, but you can tell from the way his eyes occasionally flick to you as you speak that he is listening, somewhat. It’s enough of a win that you’re willing to take it.

He winces each time your alcohol swab goes over the entry point of a stitch, but doesn’t flinch away too badly. You’re pretty proud of him for that, actually, because it must hurt like a bitch.

“You got him yesterday, though,” Sam pipes in from the side, amused as he recalls your arrival. “Barely an hour after you got here and he was quitting and heading to bed.”

“It’s hard being so naturally talented,” you say, placing the swab down and reaching for the small scissors and tweezers. “I’m an absolute delight, and Dean should appreciate that!”

“Has anyone ever believed you when you told them that?” Sam asks, presumably referring to the ‘delight’ bit.

“Why wouldn’t they, Samuel?” you ask, giving the massive man a light spritz of stink-eye. “Do you have something to say to me?”

“Nothing you don’t already know,” he snorts in response, turning a page in the tome he currently has in his lap.

You bite your lip to hide your amused smile, turning back to Gabriel. You place your hand softly on his cheek to let him know that you’re about to go back in for the stitches, before raising the other tool and bringing it to the first of the thick threads woven through his flesh. Wincing, you try and snip it as delicately as possible. Now seems like a better time than any for more distractions.

“If you think I’m bad, you should be glad you never met my grandfather,” you inform the youngest Winchester, successfully severing the first stitch and beginning the icky job of pulling it out. Gabriel makes a muffled noise of pain but remains still, and you pat his hand softly in support. “He could stir the shit out of anyone, man. Like, I’m not even kidding. The bastard gene I got from him was actually watered down by the time it got to me, so count your lucky stars.”

Sam makes a noise of contemplation, like he really is taking the time to thank whatever powers that be— those apparently being Chuck, as you’ve heard— that you’re not more like your grandfather. Honestly, you’re not kidding—they really should be grateful. You loved your grandpa but you’d never met anyone so quick to stir whatever pot may present itself before them. An opportunist with bastardous tendencies, one might describe him.

In the silence that follows, you jump to another topic for the sake of distraction once more—you’re about to move onto another stitch.

“So, now that your mother is here, are you guys actually eating like normal human beings?” you ask, tongue pressed between your lips in concentration as you try to snip the thread as painlessly as possible by manoeuvring the small scissors. “Like, balanced meals with vegetables and shit?”

You hear Sam pause in the motion of turning a page, a scoff turning into a laugh as it climbs his throat. “What—homecooked meals? Our mom? Dude, she’s worse than Dean in the kitchen, and I really didn’t think that was possible.”

You pause your ministrations to face the tall man, squinting. “What? No way. No way is she worse than Dean—”

“We’ve had to replace the fire alarms twice already,” Sam says, meeting your gaze with a look that is full of both fondness and exasperation. He lets out a laugh at your flabbergasted face. “Dude, I wouldn’t believe it either if I hadn’t seen it for myself. You’ll see, whenever she gets back with Jack. She can’t cook but it doesn’t really stop her trying.”

“Another terrible chef joins the ranks,” you proclaim dramatically, pulling the stitch you were working on out and going in on the next one. “Oh, to be able to cook. I suppose this Jack kid is our last hope.”

“He’s not even a year old, y/n,” Sam says, deadpan. “I wouldn’t count on it. Also, you can cook, you’re just lazy.”

You shrug, making a face; he has you there. “I will neither confirm nor deny these allegations.”

Once more, you feel Sam roll his eyes behind you—he should get that checked if he’s rolling them so heavily you can feel it yourself. They’re not even eyes that are in your own skull, man.

You proceed to pull shit out of your ass as you take Gabriel’s mouth stitches out, the metal tin to the side soon filled with scraps of thick thread covered in dried blood and muck. The exit wounds where the thread had been have begun to well with blood, the wounds agitated by the removal of the stitches, and you bring a new cotton pad back with alcohol to clean them up. Gabriel hisses at the contact, and you rush out apologies under your breath as you finish up. You’d forgotten to warn him, and it’s only something small but you still feel bad.

“Alright, that’s done,” you announce, mostly to yourself. You look over him, deciding which wound to treat next, when your attention is drawn to the way he seems to be shaking a little on the spot. He’s not as grounded as he was earlier when he sat down with you, and even though you have much more work to do you can tell intrinsically that this is the most he can take right now. Dressing his other wounds would have to wait until tomorrow.

You turn to find Sam already giving the archangel a scrutinising look, apparently arriving at the same conclusion you had. He gives you a nod and you let out a soft breath, turning back to Gabriel and offering your hands should he need them.

“Okay, I think that’s enough for today. Let’s get you back to the room.”

You can only hope tomorrow will offer the same amount of progress as today.

prev. || next

#supernatural gabriel #supernatural #supernatural fic #gabriel x reader #supernatural gabriel x reader #gabriel x you #supernatural gabriel x you #supernatural soulmate au #soulmate au #my work #alexa play candyshop #spn fic #spn gabriel #gabriel fic #gabriel series #gabriel fanfic #supernatural series #wing fic

78 notes · View notes

fishfingersandjellybabies · 3 years

Text

Worthy of Everything (Part 3) - fic

Characters: Dick Grayson, Damian Wayne Summary: “I’ve got you, Damian. Now let’s get you home.” A/N: Location is based on that page in TEC 1029 where they show Damian reading the casebook. Also, can’t tell if Damian’s new uni is black or gray based on the three issues it’s been fully seen in so...have fun with my vague guess haha. Dick sends a picture of Damian sleeping with his pets to only Barbara, the only one that I can see in canon who has given a shit about Damian and his emotional state in the last year, to confirm that he actually found him. Damian still spends a lot of his time apologizing for things that aren’t actually his fault and it breaks Dick’s heart, but he helps as best he can. Purposeful parallels to part one huzzah!

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3

It was an old observation tower, in the historic district. Disused since the 80s, but not run down. Still owned by the city, if he was remembering correctly, and still got annual inspections, just in case it was ever needed to be reopened.

So the building was stable, just empty. And could see all of Gotham City.

Of course Damian would come here. It was so obvious. They touted that they were the family of the world’s greatest detectives, and it didn’t occur to a single one of them. Didn’t occur to Bruce.

They should all be ashamed.

Dick took a deep inhale, ignored the butterflies in his stomach, and the tears already threatening to mist over his vision.

God, he missed this kid. He missed his kid.

The threat of tears was the joy he wanted to feel, the joy he knew was coming. How long did he have that stupid amnesia? How long was he gone? Too long, no matter the actual number.

The butterflies were the fact that he knew Damian. Knew what he heard on that phone call. Knew Damian was a feral cat on a good day, always ready to run, always halfway gone even if he was standing there.

It’d been a few days since they talked, what if Damian changed his mind? What if he already ran? Dick could be walking into an empty building, abandoned again, and he honestly didn’t know if he could take that. Didn’t know if he could take losing Damian again.

To death, to amnesia, to Bruce – how many times has he lost Damian already? How many times could his boy be ripped from his fingers?

He swallowed the lump in his throat and moved forward.

Damian would be here. He had to be.

He walked up to the door, locked by a numbered keypad, and saw that it was propped open. That was a good sign.

He stepped inside, and stood there for a moment, listening. There was nothing, not even the skittering of rodents. No footsteps. No hints of life at all. That was a bad sign.

The stairs were off in the corner and Dick practically ran to them, taking them two at a time. He huffed as he reached the landing, looking both ways down the expanse of the hallway that curved in front of him. There were doors along the outer walls, ones that clearly went to the rooms that could see out to the city. A few doors on the inner walls, probably closets and bathrooms and the like.

That was fine. He’d search every one if he had to.

So he started with the one closest to him.

But the butterflies turned into moths as he walked, as he checked more rooms that ended up empty. More rooms that had no hints that anyone had been there. No beds or clothes or food wrappers.

Turned into birds as he got halfway around the circle, with sharp beaks and talons, ripping at his insides. He’s not here, his mind began to supply giddily. He’s already gone. Doesn’t trust you like he doesn’t trust Bruce.

No, he tried to fight back. He’s here. He knows I would never-

As he caught first sight of the stairs ahead, stomach dropping knowing he’d done a full lap, he heard a door close. A heavy door, like one to the outside.

He ran, believing it to be the door he’d come in, that Damian had just left. But as he reached the landing that overlooked the lobby, he saw the door was still propped open. He glanced to another set of steps nearby. Smaller ones, that went to a rooftop entrance. He was going to check there last.

“Damian?” He finally called. He’d waited on that, in case there were other squatters here, other villains. But now that there was a sign of life, a sign someone was here, he couldn’t hold back.

No answer.

It must have been him going on the roof, Dick decided, so he rushed to the smaller stairs, and took them just as quickly as he’d taken the first set. As he reached the door, he slammed into it, throwing it open.

But…there was nothing.

Again, no signs that anyone had been up here. But almost worse than that, no signs of someone leaving either. There was no claws of a grapple hooked to the roof. No tied off rope. Not even any potential scorch or tire marks from a potential vehicle, or hookup for a glider.

So…was it Damian coming back in?

He’d never left the doorway, so immediately just twirled back around on his toes.

There.

A door on the inner ring, one of the closets that he’d already checked, was open just a crack, but that was all Dick needed. Because he could see the dim light of the hall bouncing off a pair of eyes, the shadow of a face under a hood.

And just like the phone call: “I know you’re there, kiddo.” He smiled as he started back down the stairs, slower this time. “I can see you.”

Damian blinked, and seemed to almost shrink back, just a little.

“I’m not leaving.” Dick promised. “And if you run, I’m chasing you.”

As he reached the bottom of the stairs, the door opened just a little, like it was a twitch, or a hesitation, before pulling open completely.

Damian stood there, in an unrecognizable uniform. All dark grays and blacks, save for an almost white chest plate and silver boots.

But Dick didn’t care about that. He cared more about how tall Damian was now, and how he’d missed that growth. How Damian looked a little thinner than he remembered, and there were the starts of dark bags under his eyes.

“…You came?” Damian asked quietly, stepping forward.

“Of course I did.” Dick laughed. Those joyful tears were beginning to form in his eyes now. “You doubted me?”

He wasn’t hurt by the idea, and frankly didn’t blame Damian if he thought so anyway. He’d been hurt by so many people who claimed to love him before, Bruce and Talia number one on that list, why would Dick be any different?

“No.” Damian said simply. “I just…hoped you’d change your mind.”

Dick blinked, stepped forward. His heart broke as Damian took an immediate step back, but not towards the closet. Towards the steps to the outside.

“You shouldn’t see me like this. Shouldn’t want to see me like this.” Damian murmured, dropping his gaze. “Not after what I’ve done.”

“And what did you do?” Dick asked, already knowing. Bruce had told him. The prison under Mercy Hall. Potentially killing Brother Blood. None of it mattered to him.

That wasn’t what Damian confessed to, though.

“I killed Alfred. It was my fault.” Damian said, like it was an actual fact. And Dick instantly wondered how many times he’d been told that, that he believed it. Who told him that, that he believed it.

How many times Bruce told him that, that he believed it?

“No, kiddo. You didn’t.” Dick tried softly. “Bane did, and I know you had to watch. I’m so sorry that those bastards made you watch, but there was nothing you could have done.”

But Damian was shaking his head. “I didn’t try to help you.” He continued. “When…when you rejected us after you woke up, I…I guess I rejected you.”

“Convinced yourself I was gone, so it would hurt less. I get that.” Dick nodded. “I don’t blame you for that. I would have done the same thing. Hell, I did. Or do you forget that after you died, I left the country and pretended to be a spy, instead of confront the fact that you weren’t here and our family was in shambles?”

“I never visited, I never checked in. Even Father did that, in his roundabout way.” Damian sighed, but glanced up. His eyes looked so old. So tired. “I never came after you.”

“So?”

“So why did you come after me?” Damian almost sounded like he was begging, hands laid out in front of him. “Why did you waste your time?”

Dick blinked, then smiled. “Because I love you.”

Damian’s hands instantly balled into fists. “Well, you shouldn’t.”

“And like I told you before, you don’t get to tell me that I can’t.” He took a step forward, and was happily surprised when Damian didn’t step back. “And honestly? At this point, I’m going to love you out of spite. Just to annoy you. Just to be an asshole.”

He took another step forward, and they were only feet apart now. Damian just stared up at him.

“…I don’t deserve it.” Damian whispered. “Not after what I’ve done. I don’t deserve you.”

Dick took another step forward, and now they were chest to chest. Just like he was with Bruce in the kitchen. Only now there was no anger. There was only relief.

“Opposite, actually.” Dick grinned. Damian just stared up at him in wonder. “None of us ever deserved you, Damian.”

Damian blinked, and his eyes were instantly watery, his lip trembling against his will.

“…Grayson?” He breathed. And that was all Dick needed. He reached out and enveloped Damian into his arms. Held him as close and as tightly as physics would allow. Laughed when his tears fell onto Damian’s hood.

“I’m here, kiddo.” He murmured, holding the back of his head as Damian slowly returned the embrace. Squeezed as hard as he could. “I found you.”

Damian nodded, dug his nails into Dick’s back. “Thank you.”

“Titus and your cat are at my apartment waiting for you. So are a warm bed and a hot meal. Probably haven’t seen either of those in a while have you?” Dick asked softly.

“Too busy.” Damian admitted. And that’s why Dick never saw the remnants of food, or a bed. Because he didn’t sleep, didn’t eat. Focused too hard on work that wasn’t his. Just like his goddamn father.

Well, that was going to change.

“Well, not anymore you’re not.” Dick decided. He waited a moment, let them stand in silence for a second, then tightened his grip on Damian’s shoulders, buried his face against his hood. “I’m so glad I found you, kiddo.”

Damian didn’t argue this time. Just locked his hands together behind Dick’s back and repeated, “Thank you.” Another moment, and suddenly Damian tried to lean away. “…Father?”

But Dick didn’t let him. Refused to let go, refused to give Damian even an inch. “Not if you don’t want to.” Dick swore against his head. “We won’t see anyone else, not if you don’t want to.”

And that seemed to be it. Seemed to be the final bit of assurance for Damian to finally accept what was happening, whose arms he was engulfed in. He all but slumped into Dick’s hold then, and let himself cry. Let himself sob like he did on the phone.

Dick only smiled.

“I’ve got you, Damian.” Dick promised. “Now, let’s get you home.” A second, then an amendment. “Let’s get you to our home.”

Dick gathered Damian up in his arms, laughed when Damian grumbled about being carried, relished the feeling of holding his little brother again, of knowing he was never letting go, never losing him again, not this time – and they did.

#dick grayson #Damian Wayne

47 notes · View notes

jackiesarch · 3 years

Text

i’m short on brain cells so the ask got munched but @queennymeria asked for the family section of the character development questions i reblogged a million years ago and anyway here’s some andrew lore:

11. Do they have parents? What are they like and how do they act with their child(ren)?

Andrew has a mother and father, but he really only knows his mother. His father died when he was very young and the memories he does have of him are faded, hazy things.

His mother, on the other hand, has been present his whole life. Andrew tends to view her in an fairly idealized way — he was born when she was barely twenty, she was widowed shortly after and never remarried, and through it all she remained the kindest and most loving person he’s ever known. To him, his mother was a saint, and he misses her deeply after the outbreak starts. Truthfully, like all people, his mother was flawed and not a perfect parent, often being very lenient with him. Despite being a devout Catholic with fairly traditional (though not rigid) moral views, she often allowed Andy to get in his fair share of trouble as a teenager and young adult simply out of fear of losing him. She’d already lost her husband; the thought of pushing Andy away by being strict or overbearing was more than she could handle.

Neither of them were perfect, but Andrew was genuinely loved by his mother.

12. Do they have siblings? How do they interact with them? If not, do they wish they had siblings?

Andy’s an only child! He spent a chunk of time as a kid wishing he had someone else to play with, but he never really desperately found himself looking for a sibling. It’s harder when he gets older and his mother gets more dependent on him; it would be nice to have a sibling to share those responsibilities with, he thinks, but in the end he’s always handled it on his own. He doesn’t mind the only child life.

13. Extended family? Do they see them often?

He has a handful of aunts and uncles and cousins scattered across the country, but he’s lucky if he even remembers their names — and that’s before the outbreak. Afterwards, they rarely ever cross his mind.

14. Do they like where they live? (Is it a safe place?)

It really depends on where he is in his life. In canon, while he’s at the Sanctuary, he doesn’t mind much where he lives. He has a room to himself that he pays for with the work he does, the throngs of people and workers mean that more often than not it’s the safest place around, and he has his own little training room he can lock himself in when he needs to hit something.

Alexandria is a little different. He doesn’t feel as safe there as he did at the Sanctuary, but it’s leagues safer than living in a tent in the middle of god knows where. It doesn’t help that his first few months are riddled with whispers and accusations and clear disdain from Rick’s people — he deserves the treatment, of course, but he does find it hard to get settled when he has the knowledge that everyone hates him.

15. Where do they live? Are they wealthy?Poor? Middle-Class?

Andy was born in Fairfax, Virginia. I mentioned it above, but his father died when he was young, and with only his mother working his family really straddled the poverty line. They had enough to get by when he was a kid, but a lot of his clothes and toys came from thrift stores or as hand-me-downs from older cousins. Things did get a little better when he started working as a teenager and was able to contribute to the household. They were never wealthy by any means, but Andrew and his mom did manage to get to a stable place by the time he was starting to navigate adulthood.

As an adult, he was more middle-class. He worked as a firefighter and made enough money to have his own place plus enough extra to help look after his mother.

16. Do they have a lot of expectations/pressure on them from family to do great?

It sounds awful to say, but his mom did not expect great things from him. That’s not to say she didn’t believe he was capable of them, but she didn’t need him to do great to love him. All she ever wanted was for Andrew to be happy.

Honestly, he probably could have used a handful of expectations. Might’ve kept him out of trouble as a kid.

17. Do they have pets?

He sure does! Before the outbreak, he had an aquarium in his home and kept an assortment of fish. Some of their names, as a treat:

Pinky

The Brain

Bluebell

Cupid

Andrew

Bob Ross

Ugly

Honey Garlic

He misses those fish deeply.

Alternatively, he and Julie have a St. Bernard puppy named Eeyore!

18. Who do they look up to the most/are the closest to in their family?

Hands down, his mother. She was really all he ever had, and he admired her strength and willingness to carry on and get the job done once his father died. He learned a lot from her in that respect — that sometimes we have to do things we don’t like for the greater good. I’m not sure she would’ve approved of his application of that slice of wisdom, but it’s stayed with him his whole life nonetheless.

After the outbreak, he’d say his wife. By the time he and Julie get married he’s seen her in just about every situation he can think of, and he’s still blown away by her strength and tenacity. She’s his definition of ‘survivor’, she knows how to make him laugh, and she is his rock and his anchor once their baby is born. Sappy, sappy man.

19. Is there anything special about their family?

Not really! His family pre-outbreak was just like any other family with the exception he didn’t have a dad, but that’s not really anything special.

20. Do they wish they lived in a different family/household?

Never. He’s a ridiculously loyal man and no matter what kind of problems he had as a poor kid or what kind of scrutiny and hatred his family is subjected to in Alexandria, he would never actively wish for anything different. Does he entertain the thought of what it would be like to not live in those conditions? Sure. But that’s about as far as he lets it go.

#sorry these took FOREVER gabby but thank you for asking!!!!#oc: andy benson

7 notes · View notes

ghostmartyr · 4 years

Text

SnK 132 Thoughts

This month, more people scream and die.

Exactly as keikaku.

Unlike certain keikakus, however, this keikaku is still missing the essential element of a keikaku in that there is no actual keikaku there’s just a lot of people running around screaming while they try not to die and then the screaming only stops when they die.

People also die when they are killed.

...Maybe.

Before we approach the obvious, the most interesting part of this chapter to me is that once again, Eren is presented with the option of stopping. While he’s in the planning stages of his assault, it is explained quite plainly that strategic strikes will completely undo any country’s attack on Paradis.

Hizuru favors a limited test run of the rumbling. Yelena provides a tactic that uses only a bit of the outer wall. She explains the reasoning. She isn’t wrong.

We’ve already had plentiful examples of what the Wall Titans can do. They can swim. They’re easy to spot from the distance, but there is no ammunition or strategy that can deal with them. Running is the best option, and even that is a risk.

Systematically destroying every single port would have bought Paradis all the time in the world. Yelena has this discussion with Eren back when she is wanting Eldians to die out, so they have different view of what counts as a win, but if Eren had wanted to, he could have easily wielded his massive power to keep every nation’s military from fucking with them.

He doesn’t do that. Instead of a small portion of the walls, he wakes up the entire part. Instead of targeted strikes, he goes for armageddon.

Eren has options. Hange can say that Eren has no solutions, hope, or future, but the lack of hope is all that comes close to the truth. There is a solution right here. Fight anyone who would oppose you, and win. Make it clear that the assaults only happen because they made the mistake of declaring war on Paradis.

Eldians might be treated like crap everywhere, but Eren’s murdered plenty of Eldians with this plan. If his only care is the island, he could have worked to protect it.

Instead, even in the most generous of reads, he's deconstructed Paradis’ government in a time of incredible strife, sowing the seeds for an ugly civil war that has already had its beginning skirmishes.

Eren’s actions are destructive in every single category. When he first activates the walls, Armin still has that flash of hope that Eren is only using the amount of force he needs to put an end to this assault.

He doesn’t. He wakes up every single titan, sends them marching, killing people on this island he’s supposed to care for so much, and now his closest friends are stuck in a world where to prevent genocide, they are probably condemning their own people to an even worse future than they already had.

The thing about this level of power is that you can do what you want. No one can stop you. If this starts with people forcing Historia into a breeding farm, Eren can just murder anyone who’s in favor of that.

(Sidebar: I still am annoyed that no one came up with the obvious solution for that problem. If they need someone with royal blood to still be around in fifty years, just turn Historia into a mindless titan and ditch her underground with specific instructions each new Founder can follow. Titans are functionally immortal when left alone. They’re much less fragile than humans. Any dedicated person could easily kill off all the royal heirs, so might as well simplify the process, keep one royal heir around and relatively invulnerable. Then each Founder has easy access to their power if they just go to the right place. Obviously there are risks, but honestly it’s more straightforward than having a bunch of free-minded little kids be your backup plan.)

Eren can destroy an entire country before even the most knowledgeable titan experts can work out a reliable plan.

Paradis was never in danger. They had this. The rest of the world had a hundred years to forget, but a handful of public demonstrations illustrates the point very, very clearly. Yelena’s strategy was meant to serve Zeke’s plan, but if what Eren wants is Paradis to thrive, it works. He doesn’t have much time left, but he doesn’t need it to destroy other countries’ options of attacking Paradis.

Hizuru is interested in allying with Paradis because of this power. They’re the first. They would not be the last.

At the very least, this would give Paradis more time, which they’ve all seen the need for.

Instead, Eren chooses to destroy everything that might even consider being a threat to Paradis. There is no diplomacy. There is no measured use of force. There is no plan. There is the monsters he’s always hated, and falling so far into the darkness that the freedom he claims to want is destroyed by his own hands.

There were countless threads Eren could have followed, being a demigod. He very honestly could have done whatever he wanted.

So he did.

I feel like we’re still missing why. By the time his head has gotten blasted off, he’s encouraging his dad to murder the Reiss family, and he’s hallucinating himself as a child, I think it’s more than fair to say this war has won against Eren. He’s broken, and this is the path he’s on.

Maybe it’s as simple as thinking in such stark black and white terms that he needs a future with a guarantee, and death is the strongest guarantee he can come up with.

Except going back to just last chapter, this is not what Eren wants. It is not something he is approaching with the passionate conviction of being in the right. He’s in tears over it. He’s horrified by the future he causes, but chained to it because he knows he causes it.

It’s a difficult problem to explain. From a plot perspective, I’m frustrated because there are so many ways this didn’t have to happen. I’ve said before that tragedy should feel inevitable, and with each reveal of what Eren got up to in the shadows, this tragedy feels entirely avoidable.

However, from a character perspective, it does make sense that once Eren’s course of action has been decided, he doesn’t see the other options. The inevitability is a trick of his mind, but it’s a trick that he’s bought into completely, so the tragedy is found in how truly unnecessary this all is. The tragedy is that the most powerful person on the planet is a slave to his own mind.

Here’s where that stops working for me:

We see that character arc play out better elsewhere.

That’s Floch’s role.

Floch is an unlikable, divisive zealot who will happily kill civilians and throw children out of airships. He joins the Survey Corps when it’s the hip and happening thing to do, and has none of the conviction to back up their ideals.

He is the sole survivor of a suicide charge. Everyone around him dies in the space of a few minutes, and he’s left alone to make sense of it.

The only sense he finds is that this has to be necessary.

This is how they win.

The world is chaotic and vicious, and the only way to answer that evil is with evil. This world that hates them is not allowed to wipe them out, and anyone who tries will feel their wrath.

Floch doesn’t bother with mercy or kindness. He doesn’t mind that the rest of the world has to die for them to live.

This is how his world operates. Kill or be killed. Those are clearly the rules. Those have been the rules for a hundred years, more clear than ever when they step outside and are eaten on contact.

If the rest of the world lives, Paradis dies.

Paradis is home.

For as long as it’s existed, it’s been hated. Never mind that the current people living there are also victims of the Eldian Empire. They’ve lived in a bubble, and forces keep showing up to pop that bubble, leaving nothing but bodies in their wake.

It is cruel and appalling.

But Paradis is still alive.

Because Erwin murders all these new recruits, Paradis lives.

Floch is the only one left alive to know that so intimately.

It is not a kind assessment.

It is one he redefines his life by.

Answer devils with devils. Their enemy is the entire world. There can be no rest. There can be no sympathy. As long as the outside world exists, Paradis will be a target for its hatred, and that hatred will eventually succeed in killing them.

Floch believes this. Genocide is not something he has a problem with. He’s been living in a world where it’s Us or Them, and has repeatedly made it clear that he will choose Us.

Floch is a teenage boy who survives brutality he’s not prepared for, and reconstructs his entire worldview around the tactic that tries to kill him. He’s a dick, and he does terrible things.

He believes in what he is doing.

He believes that if he doesn’t stop the plane, Paradis will die. He believes that our little ragtag group of heroes are the final, greatest threat to his home. He believes that Eren’s evil is the only thing that will keep them all safe.

At the end of the day, his only hope is that the Devil is on their side.

Floch dies believing in that hope, and he dies to the people hellbent on destroying it.

It’s tragic and sad, because he could never see anything better.

Our first real introduction to him is him on a rooftop, arguing that a boy whose eyes sparkle at thoughts of the ocean is not a good contribution to the war effort.

On that same rooftop, his devil argues that that is exactly why that boy needs to stay alive.

I understand that Eren’s somewhere that we can’t really reach right now, but I don’t feel like the story has shared the thread of how things got this bad. I can point to a dozen different factors that finally broke the camel’s back, but I wouldn’t say any of those are the reasons canon is operating under. We know that Eren came completely undone when the memories of the future were unlocked, but as late in the game as Marley, he’s still devastated by what he’s about to do.

So why does he do it? Why this choice? Why this way?

I think I spent most of last month’s post arguing that, so I won’t belabor it much more, but... I really feel like something’s being overlooked, and I don’t understand it. It’s hard to say if the story simply has a much different vibe than I expected, so my mind is rejecting all this, or if it’s intentionally weird. I’d like to think it’s intentionally weird, because in my opinion that’s a much better story, but either way, right now everything Eren’s doing feels like an incredibly pointless detour.

...Sure, that will end the world, but who cares about that, give me my character work.

How did hope become an impossibility for Eren?

To less painful things, I suppose.

No one suffers like Mikasa suffers.

I like Annie. She has always, very emphatically, wanted nothing to do with this. She has pride in her skills, but she spends years of her life undercover for a government that hates her, planning the deaths of people she respects. I like her opting out. This has never been her war, really, and she’s finally among people who will respect that she’s done with it.

It adds to the sweetness that Reiner is one of those people, now. As her self-appointed leader, he drives Annie into things she can’t stand, clearly favors Bertolt, and is generally just a pain who’s trying too hard in all the wrong areas.

Reiner gets that, and instead of bullying her into participating when she doesn’t want to, he lets her go.

Annie finally gets to pick her battles without anyone negging her.

It’s not a resolution I expected, but it’s one I’m glad for. It follows the trend of our leftover cast being completely past done with violence.

Who knows if that will turn out well for them, but I like the story taking the gentler approach. The world’s ending, so they might as well take the time to be kind to each other. It’s the opposite path of what ultimately destroys Floch, and I love to see it.

The Survey Corps is represented by their yearning for knowledge. Understanding. For a hundred years, that yearning has been paired with war, and the dead bodies have piled up.

Now, the remaining bodies left who call themselves Scouts are kind of. done with that. They’ve seen too many friends die. They’ve built trains. They’ve seen the ocean. They’ve tried foods from other countries they didn’t even know existed.

Surveying the outside world required weapons because otherwise you’d die, but there’s a reason why Levi keeps on missing the promotion to Commander. Levi is a defender of humanity. When he dedicates his heart, he does it to protect people. Learning more about the world is a side effect.

To match the Survey Corps’ ideals, violence is the side effect. It’s not what they’re meant to be about. Yet somehow they’re all soldiers with huge body counts, guilty even of killing their countrymen.

Levi lets Erwin go on that roof because he rejects Floch’s desire to condemn one of them to being a devil for the rest.

That results in letting a boy who dreams of the ocean live.

Hange becomes the Commander and gets to see their world expand. New friends are made, new technologies discovered. New civilization. New, new, new.

Aaaaaaand it’s still all trying to kill them.

Hange begins as a recruit who hates titans. What saves Hange from that hate is curiosity. At the end, that curiosity and awe is still alive. Even heading into death, we return to that beginning spark of salvation.

“Titans really are... incredible.”

No one else in the world looks at these monsters and sees something amazing. Hange is enamored with them. The world is burning, these things are responsible, yet still. There is wonder to be had in looking at them. They are an incredible, impossible creation, and Hange gets to see them up close.

A world like that has to be called incredible.

That’s why Armin gets to be Commander. Jean’s there to help. Mikasa’s there to help. Connie’s there to help.

But the Survey Corps exists to go out into the world and understand it. If something is hidden under a rock, you lift the rock. If you don’t know why someone’s doing something, you talk to them.

The world is fucking beautiful.

If the person in charge doesn’t remember that, they’re all doomed.

(This is why Levi is not allowed to be in charge.)

It’s a good sendoff for Hange. Time spent with Levi, getting to be a chaotically cool genius who saves everyone... yeah. It’s a good finish.

But this better not be fucking going where I think it’s going.

Let me politely frame my issues with dream sequences and time travel in fiction. I feel that I have done it before, but let us revisit, briefly.

There’s this show called Supernatural.

A thing that happens enough time to warrant its use as an example is that characters see or go into the future, and find that everything is fucked beyond belief. It is all bad, everything is wrong, see how you must avoid this so it never gets this bad.

The frustrating part is that hey, these characters in the future should have the same degree of agency as this guest from the past. Except they don’t. Because the past character is the main character. Future crew is just an extended what-if, and soon the entire plot will be devoted to making sure this what-if never happens. They are not real main characters, so they don’t get to do cool stuff. They’re forever doomed to failure.

The ghosts of the Survey Corps watching the progress of their living comrades isn’t a new concept. Every veteran has been haunted by them. Seeing them at the end of the story, doing exactly what we’ve been told they’re doing... fine, okay.

I just am starting to feel like the story’s quaking for a reset button.

Everything is bad. The world is fucked up beyond repair. There is no plan to deal with it, except to try to keep the global genocide from living its dream. In a world where they succeed in that, Eldians will be more hated and feared than ever before, Paradis being wiped off the map will probably be an international priority, there will be no Founding Titan to protect them, and there’s no path to recovery.

Then we’ve got a shot of ghosts all looking over the current happenings.

We know from Paths magic that all of Ymir’s people are connected. This doesn’t use that imagery; it’s based much more simply in the oath all these soldiers swore. But the point is, we see dead people. At a point in the story where many, many dead people are being produced.

I don’t mind a character being welcomed to an afterlife. A lot of stories go there.

But I am a suspicious, terrible person, and getting a glimpse at sentient dead people at this time makes me wonder if we’re allowed the privilege because they’re going to be newly present in the story.

And I am fine if we go the way of a Madoka ending. It’s better than a Lelouch option, and I like Madoka.

The only thing is, if we are going to hit a reset button, I become very, very cross at some of the choices made. Because sure, the characters might have still made those decisions, but the author knows that things are free to go as badly as whimsy will take them, because it won’t last. And with how my primary objection to the current plot is that it feels unnecessary, and like the choice to go here was made without enough reason to back it up...

It hasn’t happened yet, there’s nothing more than a suspicion that it might happen, but there are some specific kernels of “this needs more canon explanation” that I think the story should have, and if we’re stepping into the afterlife, magic solutions don’t seem far off, and if we get a magical solution without first establishing the non-magical ways we first ended up here, I will have a problem.

But hopefully none of that will even be an issue, and I’ll look back and feel silly for bringing it up.

...It’s just that our main character is not only threatening, but committing global genocide, and as of right now, the win condition is a moral win where everyone lives to oppress Eldians another day.

-tosses charred confetti-

And I feel like that is an incredibly pointless and boring story, so maybe it is not the story we’re being told, so.

So.

To next month.

#Shingeki no Kyojin #SnK 132 #tl;dr #chapter post

53 notes · View notes

starfighter10 · 4 years

Text

tlou2 opinion

So I really had to share my opinion(rant) on the last of us part 2 and boy I have a lot to say. I am gonna dwell deep into this one, so bear with me if you can and want to

But before that I have to share the feelings I hold for tlou1.Back when I finished tlou1, I knew I experienced something truly magical. I was pleasantly surprised by the beautifully crafted story, the execution of the characters, the music, the gameplay , and the effort that went into shaping the journey of the game,the character arcs and bonds. You could see and experience the uniqueness and passion that went into the first project. This game immediately became a favourite of mine.

When tlou2 was announced, my expectations were skyhigh,was elated to continue Joel and Ellie's journey and how it unfolds. The bar set by the first one was exceptionally high and probably impossible to achieve, but I had trust and faith in naughty dog, thought they couldn't go wrong with this one. After experiencing tlou2 , I am speechless.... not in a good way. I have no words to express my disappointment,frustration and anger I feel right now. I don't even know where to begin.... the absolute mess of a plot, the original characters being blatantly ignored, retconned and disrespected in favour of new bland characters, the plotholes in the story, the false advertising and marketing, naughty dog's hubris, making a complete mockery of your fans who are paying money to play something but getting baited for something else. I am utterly heartbroken and angry.

The plot - the driving force of the game is over ambitious, lazy,sloppy and nihilistic. It felt forced. Naughty dog bit off more then they could chew with this one. Tlou2 could have gone several ways in terms of plot with the existing characters, yet we get the cliche revenge plotline with the character abandoning the quest altogether to realise revenge isn't the answer. This trope has been done several times before, with more finesse and better execution. The writers aim for the " Ellie breaks the cycle of the revenge" but it really fails to achieve this as she blatanly annihilates several characters,npcs along the way in quest of her revenge. The damage has been done practically speaking. According to naughty dog's logic , I should expect Nora's sister or a random npc's friend/relatives in tlou3 hunting down Ellie in their revenge quest. Also Abby's quest literally does nothing for me. This character was so poorly written, executed and shoved down our throats, I didn't have any sort of attachment or empathy for her. I simply don't care about this character.

The circumstances that lead to Joel's death was out of character as well. Since the trailer drop in 2016, I was prepared for his inevitable death. Thought he would probably go out like the badass he is, maybe sacrificing himself for Ellie/tommy. The Joel I know from tlou1, a hardened survivor who has fought tooth and nail to survive the past 20 years would NEVER end up in a situation like that. Joel was intensely alert, critical,clever and intuitive. The argument here may be that he has softened in Jackson, but I feel at this point this should be 2nd nature to him. Something that is automatic. Yet the writer's now want you to believe he is a dumbass who would trust a group of strangers, make small talk and introductions and end up in a situation like that. One of the bigger issues was the constant reinforcing that Joel wiped down the fireflies in cold blood and doomed humanity for death by robbing them of their cure for survival,Ellie believing the cure would have been a guaranteed sure shot success ..... WHY? This retcons the first one completely. The beauty of the tlou1 was it's moral ambiguity and uncertainty. We were constantly hinted that fireflies is a mess of a group whose agendas weren't clearly known, whose actions caused the sacrifice of many people for the sake of a slight possibility of a cure.They were power hungry and were cruel enough to send a 14 year old girl to her death with no remorse,consent or any proper investigation or medical research. Joel initially negotiates to find someone else, gets shut down immediately, gets his means of survival snatched and was practically marched to his death. He had no option but to wipe clean these people who planned on killing someone dear to him, for something that is uncertain or in vain. And yes this was a selfish decision on Joel's part, and that was the beauty of it. The moral ambiguity. He was right or wrong or both - open to your interpretation. BUT NOW NAUGHTY DOG WANTS TO TO ERASE ALL THAT DEVELOPMENT. The active reinforcement that Joel was a cold, ruthless murderer who killed fireflies and deprived humanity of its cure? Trying to erase the fact that he was surviving and trying to keep his dear ones safe in this cold, brutal and unforgiving postapocalyptic world. So that we sympathize with Abby and enjoy golfing the tf outa Joel?. Ellie seems like a different character in this one, but again this character is immediately pushed to a whirlwind of traumatic events right from the start of the game. I missed her spark of joy,humour and enthusiasm. The treatment of the main chatacter in her own game is utterly cruel and disappointing, and seemed unfair to me. By the end, Ellie is broken beyond repair. Though she thematically chooses to be the better person and gives up on her vengeance and hate, she still manages to be on the losing side as she ends up losing her father figure which was her closest bond, loses Dina and the kid , she doesn't have her community, her people, her fucking fingers as well. Why? So Ellie could suffer a little more and be unable to do most important thing that bonded her to Joel. Not to mention she loses her switchblade too, her mother's final memory. Surprised that ND spared her mother's letter . Feel her pain and despair. Why does Ellie get such a shitty,depressing, worthless, futile and a hopeless conclusion while Abby not only gets her revenge successfully, forms a close bond in Lev and gets to escape possibly to a fresh start. Ellie? Nah she gets to suffer alone. Her BIGGEST FEAR has become a reality by the end. The least they could do is let Ellie have some solace and calm, surrounded by her loved ones on that farm,her trying to recover from her trauma slowly but surely, it's what joel would have wished for. But no, she is left all alone, absolutely traumatized, all by herself with nothing to look forward to. Oh and tommy is whole new character in every scene. So keep your eyes peeled for various versions of tommy throughout. The character inconsistencies are ridiculous.

The gameplay, beautiful sceneries, and new characters like dina and jesse are few of the positives of game - leaning more towards Jesse. Dina felt perfect for Ellie and Jesse did manage to lighten up few of the moments. The space shuttle cutscene, the museum flashback sequence, ellie and joel's flashbacks were the only parts that remotely captures the magic and beauty of tlou1. I got emotional watching them. The space shuttle sequence hits you with the feels. Joel slaying a bloater with a machete was cinematic art. (Hot too)

Abby... the forced deuteragonist, is an utter failure of character execution. Her character was forced onto us, felt hasty and lacked real build up. She starts off on the wrong foot by killing one of the most popular characters. If ND really wanted this character to work, the only possible way would have been to play her point of view and backstory prior to her mercilessly killing and torturing a guy who just saved her life. What was ND thinking? That a few hours of her pov,forced out of the blue background story, her getting to play with dogs while ellie has no option but to attack the dogs, the abby-lev bond which is pretty much discount or the walmart version ellie and joel would be enough to side with her over ellie and joel???? The part where they force you to play as abby against ellie? It made me sick. I felt cheated and disgusted.

The false advertising to make us believe joel is alive and good? That this is an ellie and joel centric game?To tug at your heartstrings like this. A complete mockery of the fans who waited 7 years to see their favorite characters get horribly treated,retconned, disrespected and thrown under the bus in favour of new unlikable characters. Butchering the heart and soul of the last of us - Joel and Ellie's bond. The fact that these two don't even get a heart to heart before his death, that Joel dies uncertain of ellie's future, maybe thought he could not save Ellie in those final painful moments, that she had never forgiven him, Ellie never getting her closure with Joel, or really getting to tell him how much he meant to her.... all these thoughts legit made me shed tears. Broke my heart. This is how much ND wanted to honour and respect ellie and joel.

The game's conclusion is hollow, futile, worthless and depressing. And in my opinion, this is non canon. This is the only way I can cope with this unsastifying conclusion. It is immaturity I guess... but I will feel better about it.

Though I utterly despise tlou2, tlou1 will continue to remain one of my favorite pieces of work in fiction. JOEL FUCKING MILLER WILL ALWAYS BE THE BADDEST BITCH AND NOTHING WILL CHANGE THE LOVE I HAVE FOR HIM.

If someone actually read it all the way, thank you for your time and effort. Really needed to rant and let these negative emotions out.

#the last of us #the last of us part 2 #tlou spoilers #tlou #tlou2 #tlou joel #tlou ellie #my rants #ellie #joel miller #joel

74 notes · View notes